Badly Made Bridges

Riddle's gone and done it again, folks. Can I just brag for a minute here and ask, who called it? Who fucking called it? Yes, that is right. I, the rapturous, risqué Rita Skeeter, totally nailed the virgin on the cherry with my suppositions about Riddle.

Out of 13, count 'em: 13, attempted murders by one Thomas Marvolo Riddle, there are currently 12 "victims" left alive, one of which was actually kidnapped because the tight-arse didn't even shell out the big bucks on assassins with the stones to go through with it. Those are not very good odds, even for a bloody batshit crazy bloke like Riddle. To make the best of it, he 'logically' decided that attempting to off the members of an anti-Riddle organization in one day was the best way to not get caught. On stand the psychopath announced that the deaths were meant to be "artistic and beautiful", and then proceeded to have a lengthy conversation with his right hand about how much of a genius he was before security carted him off.

Out the courtroom doors he could be heard singing The Sound of Music's "Favourite Things".

By this time you all know about that cute little band of hippies who lived through hell and got 5.1 million to split between them after Vol de Mort Fashions was liquidated and Riddle sent to the loony bin. But, just in case you're all too busy masturbating over new MILF Dorcas Meadows or her working class sex machine fiancée Edgar Bones, or even Gideon and Marlene McKinnon-Prewett, if passionate/possibly crazy men or feisty scarred chicks are your kink--and lest we forget the marathon make-outers, pretty boy Fabian Prewett and his bobby-turned-artist lover Caradoc Dearborn... where was I? Oh, yes. Just in case you pervs are all too busy wanking to whichever of these highly televised casualties makes you dewy in the nethers, allow me to summarize.

Riddle is bouncing off the walls of a padded room somewhere, and his company Vol de Mort Fashions went three sheets to the wind. The cheap bastard had his house and cars listed as company material, too, so if you're real quick, you can snap up some hideous piece of his home décor from the police auctions.

Bellatrix Lestrange--Riddle's right-hand woman and number one fangirl--got minimal time for covering Riddle's August murder of Yale Harris, and for general illegal-type dealings, though I have no doubt the woman will get parole in a year or two. She's too wild to be caged up for long.

As for the rest of them, there weren't any interesting charges. Though when Rabastan Lestrange sold out everyone from his big brother, Rodolphus, to the creepy little wannabe-rocker son of The Ministry music executive Barty Crouch, there was quite a ruckus. Crouch Junior went postal in the court room and tried to stab his way past security with a pen. Great parenting there, Crouch Sr.

Now I know what you're thinking. Rita Skeeter, you sexy thing, why speak of all this when it's all over the news anyway? Never fear, dear readers. In print as in bed, I will never disappoint.

What wasn't publicised was that before the murder attempts, various members of the Order of Weed core group--yes, kids, all members that were attacked--reported to the police various fears, reasons, and evidence (including those slashed tires and broken windshields, you'll remember) that they, you guessed it, would be attacked. Police dismissed this completely and left the bittle things all on their onesie to fight the big bad Fashion King himself. Who, apparently, was also obsessed with killing one Harry Potter, aged one years old, because some crazy fair fortune teller claimed the kid was his greatest nemesis. The young Potter was in the vehicle with his parents when it was run off the road, and survived with nothing more than a lightening shaped scar on his head. Now that is one hell of a story to tell the girls he'll want to bed in a decade and a half, give or take. Foolproof pick-up line, mark my words.

Well, that's about enough of that, don't you think? Time to party hardy and find a new fashion icon. (I recommend someone with taste.)

As always, keep your ears up and your eyes open.

This is the mouth with the message, signing out.

***

"The flights aren't too bad, but I've been having trouble getting a hold of a realtor," Gideon was saying as he and Fabian walked side-by-side down the street toward Molly's house. It was late December and most of the landscape was stark and bare, and the two brothers stuffed gloved hands into parka pockets as they crunched over a snow-covered sidewalk that had yet to be cleared off. Since the settlement from Vol de Mort had gone through, Gideon, Marlene, Fabian and Caradoc had gone into express-mode where moving to America was concerned, and were hoping to be out of England by the end of January at the latest. "I don't know if they're afraid of British people, or too busy to call back, or if the four I've called in the L.A. area all have no idea how to use their voicemail, but it's really starting to piss me off."

"I found some flamingly queer man who thinks it's his duty as a queen to make sure gay people get great housing opportunities provided for them," Fabian said loftily. "Too bad you're married to a girl. He's emailed us a bunch of nice places already, and we only told him what we wanted like, four days ago."

"Lucky you," Gideon mumbled, but he was smiling, and jabbed Fabian playfully in the arm with his elbow. Three houses away from Molly's after rounding the corner, Gideon couldn't help but notice the strangest sight gracing Arthur's front lawn. "What in the name of Prince Charles' ear wax...?" Gideon started to ask, but trailed off into a stunned silence.

Amidst the Christmas lights and the tree in the window, there was Rita Skeeter lounging in a lawn chair and wearing the smallest yellow and red polka-dotted bikini that Gideon had ever seen in his life. Next to her were three space heaters and an obvious orange extension cord trailing toward the garage.

"Uh," Fabian said, stopping a few feet from Rita and staring at her with a look of total confusion on his face.

She smiled up at them from her spot on a blanket covered lounge chair, her two propped up umbrellas apparently not keeping the wind out well enough because despite the heaters melting the snow around the cardboard they were propped on, she still had goosebumps all across her skin, and her nipples were hard as rocks.

"Hello boys," she greeted them cheerily and took a sip from a thermos that was more Baileys than coffee.

Still completely dumbfounded, Fabian managed to shake his head and ask, "What the hell are you doing?"

Gideon quirked an eyebrow. "Does this have anything to do with the message you left on the answering machine about your 'book'?" he asked, cocking his head. "And if it is, how the fuck did you come to the conclusion that sunbathing in our yard in December was the solution to your problem?"

"You haven't been returning my calls. I figured I had to do something fantastic," Rita said, as though she were being completely practical. "I'm writing this book whether you help or not. If it's unofficial, I'll just be taking a lot more liberties with the details. I'm only thinking of you, here."

Gideon exchanged a look with Fabian. "Your logic is astounding," he said. "Jesus. Hasn't our sister been out here nagging you about catching your death?"

"Yes. She brought me a top up of coffee for my Baileys when she realized I wasn't leaving. I don't think I've even been out here half an hour yet," Rita admitted, and then, gestured to the window. "If you watch, though, she looks out the window and frowns at me every two or three minutes."

"Right. Well, maybe I'm just in a really good mood, but you'd better come in. We can talk while you warm up," Fabian said, and grinned brightly at his brother. As if to pre-emptively cut off any argument from Gideon, Fabian said, "There's a girl in a bikini on our lawn in the dead of winter. I think that merits a little give and take."

Gideon shrugged. "Says the gay bloke."

"It's because I'm gay that I'm allowed to. Marlene would kill you," Fabian said with a grin, and then turned to Rita. "Put on whatever clothes you have with you and come inside."

Rita grinned, wrapped the blanket around herself and stepped into some red stilettos. "Lead the way."

Of course, Rita had brought clothes with her. They were in her car, however, and she figured this would suffice for the moment. Not like Fabian would get hard thanks to a glimpse of her thigh, and even if Rita did happen to be scar free, Gideon was sickeningly devoted to Marlene. Rita knew. She'd done her research.

In the kitchen Molly was already putting the tea on. "Lucky the children are out at Christmas party with Arthur," she tutted with a glance at Rita's attire, and also thanked Tony Blair that Ron and Ginny were sleeping upstairs and need not witness Rita's serious lack of clothing. Sure, Marlene worked at the pool, but she always came home in her clothing instead of looking like some... scarlet woman. "Did anyone want cookies? Pretzels? I can dig into the Christmas stock since you boys have brought a guest home."

"I would just love a biscuit," Rita said, draping an arm around Fabian and winking at him.

Fabian stared for a moment and then burst out laughing, draping an arm around her shoulders as well. "You are one tacky little flirt, Rita Skeeter."

"I'll take that biscuit to go, and perhaps I can take your brothers somewhere a little more private so we can... talk," Rita said, waggling her eyebrows jokingly.

"We can just go downstairs," Gideon suggested, taking a mug of tea as Molly handed it to him and thanking her by kissing her on the cheek. She passed out tea and biscuits to Fabian and Rita (with a frown on her face) as well, before Gideon led them downstairs and Molly turned her attention to her dishes. "So," Gideon asked he sat in his favourite chair and took a sip of his tea. "What's the focus of your book, exactly, Rita? The Order, or Riddle?"

"The story," Rita corrected, settling herself on the couch and taking a small bite of cookie. "I want it all. The people, the relationships, the build up, the tension, the drama, the attacks, the slowly spiralling mental state of Riddle. All of it. I want the world to hear the whole twisted tale of intrigue and crime and bad fashion sense."

"You've got your hands full then," Gideon said. "And you know all about how the Order came about since we told you in that interview last... Spring, was it? What specifically do you want us to tell you?"

"I need to sit down with you when I have my tape recorder, but I want to know all the little details. I want to know about the missions and the arrests and the drama between Gideon and Marlene, and how Fabian managed to convince a man of the law to drop out and join an illegal group. And I want to know what it felt like to watch all this bad shit happen to everyone you care about," Rita rambled. "I want to know the interesting things. And I want quotes. And for you to sign some release papers, once I get them all drawn up. I can't claim official and it'll be a lot harder to get published if you don't."

"That's a lot to ask," Fabian said. "You kind of want to publish our lives."

"The world is gagging for it," Rita said. "And I was here. Let me do this. I'll give you vetoing rights. Within reason."

Gideon let out a frustrated breath. "This was all hard enough to go through the first time," he said quietly, trying not to get angry. And it wasn't anger directed at Rita, either, as he was sure she'd do them justice--within reason. But it was the last two months since Halloween, and the badgering from police, and the testimonies, and the media, and everything else... Gideon just wasn't sure how much any of them had left in them to offer Rita. And then everything leading up to it? "Fabian's right. Your asking to write a biographical account of the last two years for twelve people. That's a bit much to chew, for you or the rest of the world. Our fifteen minutes'll be over soon enough, and people will forget about us, and about Riddle, and about this, and your book will be irrelevant."

"No it won't," Rita insisted. "It's an amazing story. Even once your so-called fifteen minute is over, this will still interest people for years. Decades. This is one of the biggest, dumbest murder attempts... Fuck, it was a conspiracy. He... it affected so many people, and you guys were right at the center of the maelstrom. You have to get how this is important. Nothing like this has ever happened before. Ever. You... Don't you see? This information belongs to the people! It isn't right of you to keep it to yourselves."

"It isn't right of us to keep the personal events of our lives private?" Gideon questioned, furrowing his eyebrows. "And it is a lot. Take asking about me and Marlene, for example. That's not even two years. That's the better part of our lives."

"To you it's a story, but for us it's real, Rita," Fabian said, taking a sip of tea. "It's not as easy as all that for us."

"Oh, bugger off,” Rita said loudly, rolling her eyes at them. “Don't talk to me like I don't understand what it means. I'm a journalist. Reality is my life. But don't you think it'll feel good to tell the whole world you were right all along when they all just thought you were crazy? You can share something real with them. You can connect with people you've never even met. I'm willing to sit in a bikini on your front lawn in December to get your attention. Can't you at least give me just a couple hours of your time? It'll be cathartic. I'll even get you drunk and fuck you afterwards."

"You're begging," Fabian pointed out dryly.

"So?" Rita retorted, voice challenging. "I have no problem with begging for this. This is an amazing opportunity, and you two are ready to throw it away. I bet I can convince the others, but if I don't have the Prewett brothers, I don't have a book."

"Mmm, yes, and it feels so nice to be this important," Gideon said with a sigh. "I don't know, Rita. I'm not sure I like the idea of exposing everything poignant in my life for the sake of getting a few laughs or a few tears out of people I've never met, and probably won't meet. What do you think, Fabian?"

"Well. I don't know," Fabian said. "It had a happy ending, didn't it?"

"I guess so," Gideon agreed, looking at his brother and chewing on his lip. He was quiet for a few moments, considering the situation, and eventually he took another sip of tea before saying. "All right."

Rita grinned brightly, and then turned to face Fabian.

"Hey, he's the tough nut to crack. I'm notoriously easy," Fabian said with a wink. "We're in."

Laughing, Rita leaned off the couch, abandoning her blanket and planting kisses on the cheeks of the two men across from her. "You won't regret it. I swear."

***

"Have I told you today how happy I am your exams were scheduled early?" Sirius asked, running lathered hands over Remus' back and up around his neck. "I don't mind getting up before noon after a double for this."

Remus leaned into Sirius' touch and tilted his face up towards the spray of the shower. He turned around then, facing Sirius, and slid his hands down Sirius' sides, letting them come to rest on his hips. It was an early start for Sirius, perhaps, but a late start for Remus. He had a few days off of work, however, and he could scarcely think of a better thing to do on a cold morning than take a hot shower with Sirius.

Ignoring Sirius' remark, Remus asked, "Do you remember the first shower we took together? When Lily almost caught us in the act and you decided sticking your hand underneath my towel while she was still in the room was a good idea?"

"It was a good idea," Sirius grinned, nuzzling into Remus' wet hair and sliding a hand along his face as he pushed his crotch forward. "You made a wonderfully indecent sound."

Remus made a sound in his throat at sensation and then chuckled, voice low. Tilting his face and pressing his mouth against Sirius' ear, Remus said, "Kind of like that noise, you mean? ...How long do you think we have before we run out of hot water?"

Sirius was about to reply when the buzzer sounded over the running water. Groaning he said, "Better question. If we ignore whoever that is, how long until they go away?"

Remus wanted to ignore it too, but when the sound came again, he thought it might be important. Sighing, he pressed a quick kiss to Sirius' lips. "Look, I'll go see if it's important. If it isn't, I'll be back in a minute or two."

Remus knew Sirius well enough to hop out of the shower right away without giving Sirius a shot to try and change his mind. Remus towelled off his hair briefly before wrapping the towel around his waist and threw a smile at Sirius before heading out of the bathroom.

Pressing the button on the buzzer, Remus asked, "Yes?"

"Well hello there. Rita Skeeter. Can I have a few minutes of your time, please?"

Remus blinked for a moment. "Uh. Now?"

"Yes. Now. If you're doing something kinky, you can just let me up and I'll watch until you finish. But it is rather important."

"Just a... just a moment," Remus said hesitantly. Taking his finger off the button, Remus called, "Sirius, Rita Skeeter wants to come up."

"What the fuck for?" Sirius called back, agitation obvious. Still, the water shut off and Sirius came out of the bathroom a few moments later with his wet hair stuck to his face and towel hitched low on his hips. "Should we get dressed or give her something to fawn over?"

Remus quirked his eyebrows and then pressed the button again. "Come on up," he said to her, electronically unlocking the front door for a few seconds and then running his hands through his wet hair. "She said it would only be a few minutes."

"Well that's kinky beyond your normal standards," Sirius smiled wryly, tightening his towel. "I'll put on the tea."

"I'm not kinky," Remus responded archly, giving Sirius a stern sort of look. "I just want to make sure she knows we were in the middle of something so she won't feel inclined to stay long."

When she finally knocked, Remus fastened his towel on his hips more securely and let her in with a smile.

"Well, well, well," Rita said with a wide replying grin, trailing her fingers across Remus' chest as she walked past him into their apartment. "Mostly naked wet men. Just what I love. Quite a scar you have there, love. Where'd you get it?"

Remus flushed. He'd actually forgotten about the scar, but her touch and her mention of it made him quite vividly aware of his state of undress. Perhaps he hadn't entirely thought that through. Sirius was having a bad effect on him.

"Uh. I was attacked by a dog as a child," Remus answered finally, feeling uncomfortable as he shut the door behind her and made his way into the kitchen, positioning himself close to Sirius.

"Tea?" Sirius asked as he set the pot on the stove, grinning unabashedly at Rita after giving Remus a quick, reassuring peck on the cheek.

"Coffee, if you have it," Rita responded and sat down at the table, crossing her long legs in front of her and raising her eyebrows as she looked between the two men. "I won't keep you long. I just have one very important question for you."

Snaking an arm around Sirius' waist, Remus looked at Rita over his shoulder and asked politely, "What can we do for you, Miss Skeeter?"

"Rita is fine, please. And I'm writing a book," she said with a grin. "The Prewett brothers have given us permission, so now I need to talk to everyone else. An interview or two, and I'll be out of your hair. Can I count on you?"

"A book about what?" Sirius asked, confused, reaching into the cupboard for the coffee canister. "The shite with Riddle you mean?"

"Yes," Rita said. "All of it. The whole story. The Prewetts are on board, but having you two too would really round out the story."

"What do you mean by the whole story?" Remus asked.

"The papers published the facts. I want to publish the people. You are all incredibly fascinating, and even what little I know of you all has me enthralled," Rita said. "You are what make it interesting. Not just you. I mean you plurally. The Order. I plan on talking to all of the core. So what do you say. Are you in?"

Sirius shrugged and glanced at Remus before moving around him to get mugs. "I don't know. If Gid and Fay are all right with it I guess. But I mean, you're not going to fuck with the facts to try and make it more juicy than it is, are you?" Sirius' real fear (though he'd never say it out loud for fear of sounding cocky) was that if Rita were writing a book she'd do the same thing a lot of the papers had done; made Sirius out to be some heroic seeker of justice because he pummelled Peter's face, while simultaneously a victim because all the blame had been loaded onto him.

"Don't you think it's sort of juicy enough?" Rita asked. "Look, I love drama. I love it. And you've read Detail Oriented. You know how I write. I have a flair and a flourish. I embellish. But I don't fuck with facts."

"How explicit is it going to be?" Remus asked. "I don't want... my whole life to be..."

"Oh, Remus. You're the one that was left behind in all of this. The one who had to watch all of his friends hurting and healing and in jail. You're almost the most tragic out of the lot of them. It'll be explicit in that sense," Rita said, and relaxed back into her chair from where she'd been leaning forward as she spoke. She trailed her eyes up and down Sirius and Remus' bodies, and then smirked. "But, it won't be explicit. They won't publish it if it's porn. But you will be outed. It's important to the story. I trust that doesn't bother you?"

"Well no," Sirius said. "I'm the disgraced son of the Black family, Rita. Everyone and their monkey knows I shag blokes. Or suck cocks in broom closets anyhow. What are you going to do, write a chapter about each of us? I mean, I don't really feel that the pony my parents gave my for my seventh Christmas is relevant to Peter Pettigrew having his head wedged up his arse, you know?"

"You got a pony for Christmas?" Remus asked, bemused, not giving Rita a chance to reply.

"What, that's shocking?" Sirius asked, although he was blushing a little. "His name was Tipper. Mother and Father sold him when they found out James and I painted the pot leaf on the side of the hospital."

"Yes, it's shocking. Somehow I just can't picture you astride a fat little pony," Remus said, not quite managing to hold back laughter. "Oh, the life of privileged children. I'm sure you and Narcissa had many fun times hanging around the stables and tying ribbons into your horses' manes."

"Jackass," Sirius scowled. "How is it that Aidan is a cowboy because he rides, but the image of me doing it makes you think of ribbons? Am I really that gay?"

"Oh my. Sorry if I've offended, cowboy. Some time you'll have to put on..." Remus trailed off awkwardly, clearing his throat and remembering they had company. He swallowed the unfinished quip about leather chaps that had been on the tip of his tongue and looked guiltily at Rita.

Rita was just grinning. "No, no. Carry on. Don't stop on my account. The look you were giving him just now was just beginning to hint at something interesting."

"We'll talk about how dashing I might look in a cowboy hat and boots some other time," Sirius said, waving his hand dismissively as the kettle started whistling. "Why are you here again, Rita?"

"Permission. Once I get verbal consent, I'll set up interviews and bring releases to be signed," Rita said casually. "The releases will protect you too. Making sure you have rights if I misquote you. I'll keep all the recordings. You'll do it, right?"

"What do you think?" Remus asked Sirius softly. "Gideon and Fabian have agreed. Do you think it'll be weird, though, to have a book out there with us in it?"

"No weirder than the photographers who camped outside of the apartment during the trial," Sirius answered. "I'll do it if you're alright with it."

"I don't really see a problem with it," Remus replied hesitantly.

"Great," Rita said, getting up and clapping her hands. "Then I'll be in touch. Unless you're going to get rid of the towels and give me a reason to stay, I have other people to talk to."

"Phone in advance next time, will you? I got up early to get clean," Sirius said. "And I guess you won't be having coffee?"

"To clean what, is the question," Rita said, getting up. "And I'll pass on the coffee. This didn't take as long as I thought. Ta ta, boys. See you later. It's been fun."

Remus frowned at the lecherous look she was giving Sirius. "Good bye, Rita."

"Don't let the door smack you in the bum on the way out," Sirius called as she left, sticking the coffee back in the cupboard. "D'you want tea, Moony, since I've gone and boiled the water?"

"Sure. I'm a little chilled. It is December, after all, and we are standing around with wet hair and no clothes," Remus said. "A nice cup of tea is definitely the ideal way to warm up, don't you think?"

"Bye, boys! Have fun!" Rita called laughingly over her shoulder as she left and shut the door behind her.

"Is that supposed to be sarcasm, Remus Lupin?" Sirius asked, looking at Remus and quirking an eyebrow. He dropped his towel. "Oh, whoops! How silly of me!"

"Well. Goodness. You're clumsy," Remus said, then dropped to his knees in front of Sirius, looking up at him and nuzzling his thigh. "Let me get that for you."

***

Harry had been looking out the window and bouncing all morning, pointing at the yard and squealing, "Mama! Dada! Snow!" until James and Lily had finally caved in and fitted their son into his snowsuit before dressing themselves and letting him loose in the backyard. Building the snowman had been James' idea, and he seemed to be the one doing all the work while Lily tried to teach Harry how to make snow angels. Harry seemed far more fascinated with cramming as much snow as he could into his mouth.

"Harry, sweetums, Mummy said no," Lily admonished for the millionth time, and sighed. Well at least he wasn't eating anything yellow.

"Come on, Harry! This is your first snowman!" James called. "Lily, stop distracting him. Snowman! It's snowman time!"

"No man!" Harry squealed as James scooped him up and carried him over to what he'd built already.

"That's the head, Harry. Want to put eyes on him? Want to put eyes on No Man the Snowman?" James asked brightly. "Come on, Lils. Let's find some stones for eyes."

"I'll grab some out of the candle jar on the kitchen table," Lily suggested, getting to her feet. "And I'll grab a carrot out of the icebox for good measure."

"Cool," James said, and then jumped as a car he hadn't been paying attention to honked. He turned and looked, and noticed a shiny black Impala with a familiar blonde behind the wheel.

"Lily, we have company," he called as the car pulled into the driveway.

"Hello, family!" Rita called brightly as she shut off the car and climbed out, dressed in purple leggings, white thigh high furred boots, and a white fluffy parka, hanging open to reveal a purple and black plaid turtleneck. She pulled off a pair of purple sunglasses and squinted into the daylight as she posed. She loved first impressions. "A day outside playing, how nice. I swear I won't interrupt for long."

Lily came out of the house, carrot and rocks in hand. "Company?" she asked, confused. "Who'd come over without..." she trailed off, spotting Rita, and couldn't help but raise her eyebrows at Rita's garb. "Oh, Miss Skeeter. Can't say we were expecting you. Er." Rita Skeeter was hardly normal 'company' for the Potters.

"I just have one quick question for you," Rita said, leaning against her car. "I'm writing a book. Will you do an interview with me and sign some release forms? Gideon and Fabian Prewett are on board, and so are Sirius and Remus, sexy little homos that they are. Shame, that. So. What do you say?"

"You convinced Remus to do an interview with you? Really?" James asked, shocked. "Moony must've been in a hell of a good mood."

"He was naked," Rita confessed, leading forward as though telling him a secret. "They both were. I think they were quite eager to get me out of their apartment, to be honest. But yes, they agreed."

"Well that's hardly surprising," Lily commented thoughtfully. "Remus and Sirius naked, I mean, not them agreeing to you writing a book about them. Or... what's it about?"

"Sir's naked!" Harry cheered happily, clapping his hands and trying to wriggle out of his father's arms, presumably to eat more snow.

James whirled him around, entertaining his son and paying very little attention to Rita. If she could sell Lily, James wouldn't be fussed.

"The story of the Order of Weed and its epic battle with the head of Vol de Mort Fashions, Thomas Marvolo Riddle," Rita said. "Mostly about the people involved. What sort of human effects it all had. The human element is much more interesting than the boring facts."

"The 'epic battle' of the Order versus Riddle?" Lily questioned, quirking her head slightly and looking thoughtful. "When you say the 'human element' you mean what? The blood sweat and tears that went into the hullabaloo, or Halloween? I mean, I'd just like to know what we might be signing up for here. It hasn't exactly been... the best few months."

"No, but you won," Rita replied. "You won 425,000 pounds each, in fact. That's nearly a million per couple. It was a journey, and it had its ups and downs. Halloween, I will admit, was quite a huge down. But, as Fabian said, it had a happy ending. What can you lose from sharing your story? I don't understand why you're all so reluctant. I'm tired of spouting out the same old arguments. Four others are already in. Can I count you two too?"

Lily sighed. "The forms you'll have us sign... they'll give us some say in what you use?"

"No. You won't get any say. It's my book, not yours. That clear? I'm not here to mislead you," Rita replied firmly. "But it'll give you legal rights if you think I've misquoted you. Which I won't, because I'll be recording everything. It isn't my intention to make anyone look bad. I just want to tell a story. This is an amazing, amazing story. It's unbelievable. I just want to share it with the world. And hopefully get rich out of the deal, too."

Lily couldn't help but smile. "Alright, alright. We'll do it then."

"Hear that, Harry? We will! Mommy said so, so we will, because what Mommy says goes, got that little man? You will always, always listen to your mommy," James said, throwing Harry up into the air and catching him again as he laughed with glee.

"Fabulous," Rita said. "Well, I'm off then. I'll be in touch to set up an interview. Kisses, family!"

"Bye, bye," Lily said, and she James and Harry waved Rita out of the driveway. Once she'd honked halfway down the street, Lily said, "That woman could probably talk George Bush into resigning if she put her mind to it." Handing Harry the carrot she was still holding, she asked, "Do you want to give No Man a nose, sweetums?"

"Yes, yes, yes! Nose fo' No Man!" Harry said brightly.

"I think that's the most complex thing he's said yet!" James said excitedly. "He must really like the snowman."

"I think he just really likes snow. Period." Lily shook her head. "What am I going to do with the two of you, hmm?"

"Love us forever and ever," James said, setting Harry back down to play and stepping towards Lily to kiss her, then rub some snow into her hair that he'd picked up when he'd put Harry down. He grinned brightly at her and said, "I love you, Lils."

"Love you, too," Lily replied with a smirk, and then reached down, scooping a handful of snow and smushing it right in James' face. "Look, Harry!" she exclaimed. "Daddy's a snowman!"

***

"All I want is to ask you and your husband if..."

"I don't care! My time is too valuable to waste on you. Now quit pestering us. I have enough real press organized, I don't need you," Narcissa replied, impatient.

"I'm not normal press. I'm writing a book," Rita said, annoyed. "I just need a minute or two of your time."

"And I don't care to give you a minute of my time," Narcissa retorted. "Which I've already told you about a hundred times."

"Narcissa?" Lucius questioned, coming into the hall with Draco (who was holding a stuffed terrycloth bunny) in his arms and frowning at Narcissa's redface and obvious irritation. "What's going on?"

"That stupid Skeeter woman won't leave me alone," Narcissa said with a sigh, lifting her finger off the button and facing Lucius. Apparently Rita wasn't ready to leave her alone just yet, though, as she began buzzing insistently. Narcissa took a deep breath, reached for her son, and said, "Lucy, can you make her go away? She's driving me insane."

Lucius shrugged, handing Draco over and moving over to the intercom. "Hello?" he asked, holding the button down. "Could I ask why you're so determined to bother my wife?"

"I'd like to speak to both of you, actually," Rita replied. "I'm writing a book and I'd like your input. I'm only asking for a few minutes of your time now to pitch my case, and if you agree, we can set up an interview. If not, I'll leave you alone. But I'm not leaving until you at least hear me out."

Lucius furrowed his eyebrows and glanced at Narcissa. "A book about what?"

"The Order and the mess with Riddle. About all of the people involved. Considering Narcissa is the highest profile person with anything interesting to say, I want her--and you, Mr. Malfoy--on board," Rita said, employing a little flattery. "The Prewett brothers have agreed, and so have the Potters. And Remus and Sirius. I spoke to them yesterday."

"Sirius agreed, hmm?" Lucius couldn't help but smile at Narcissa, whose expression had changed slightly. Without saying anything else to Rita he pressed the button to open the gate. "The least we can do is hear her out."

Narcissa was now pouting, but she wasn't quite as annoyed. "You're terrible. I asked you to get rid of her, not invite her in for tea."

"Well she's a person, Cissa darling, not a bug to be swatted away," Lucius said.

Narcissa sighed and stretched up on her tip toes to kiss Lucius. "You're too kind, you know that? I don't know what's happened to your edge."

Lucius smirked. "I no longer have to put up with your cousin and Potter as students. It's been amazing stress relief, although I must admit I get a little tense when they're over for dinner."

The mention of Sirius reminded Narcissa that Sirius had agreed to be part of Rita's whole mess. She couldn't imagine why.

The doorbell rang then, and Narcissa went to answer it. "You'd better not take long. I have things to be getting on with."

"Hello to you too, Mrs. Malfoy. You are even more radiant in person than in your adverts. And this must be Draco. Hello, you little blond devil. You're going to be a right prat with parents like yours, aren't you? Yes you are."

"Are you calling us prats, Miss Skeeter?" Lucius asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Certainly not," Rita said brightly. "Just look at you both! Narcissa and your unique temperament, and Lucius and your intelligence and class. Mix that together, and what have you got? A beautiful, over-confident, brilliant, snobby, creative enigma. What a child, what a child."

Draco looked at her, and then looked up at his mother with an unimpressed look on his face.

Narcissa laughed then, thinking the look very fitting of Rita's little speech. "Well. Come in then. Did Sirius really agree to help you?"

"And why are you writing a book about what happened?" Lucius asked, shutting the door and then leading everyone toward the sitting room. "Don't you think there's been enough publicity as is? It's a worn topic."

"I'm not just going to regurgitate the facts. I want to write about each of you, of all the people. People are most interesting in any situation, not the facts. I wish to expose the human element."

"Well, if Sirius has said yes, I suppose I can agree as well. It'll just be a matter of finding the time. I'm very busy, you know," Narcissa said flippantly as she sat on her favourite chair, letting Draco crawl down and play with his terrycloth rabbit.

"I have barely yet begun to explain," Rita said with a bemused smile. "After all of that fuss, you're that quick to agree?"

"You underestimate Narcissa's value of family," Lucius commented as he sat in his own chair and crossed his legs. "Would you like a drink, Miss Skeeter?"

"Certainly. Some brandy, perhaps, if you have it. And can I assume you will also be a part of my book, Lucius? From what I hear, you tend to do as your wife does, or as she either requests or requires," Rita said, her smile now with a bit of an edge as her curiosity sparked. She really should wait until she had her tape recorder, but Narcissa and Lucius were both just so very fascinating, she couldn't help it.

"Don't speak disrespectfully to my husband in my house," Narcissa said, voice sharp. "My husband has saved my life and my heart too many times to count, and I'll not have you, petty little leech that you are, criticizing his actions."

"It's fine, Narcissa," Lucius said. "I like to keep my wife happy, Miss Skeeter." Getting up again he walked over to the bar to mix a drink for Rita and for himself. "I hardly think it's appropriate, however, for a writer with little credibility beyond trivial, self-published commetary to make any presumptions about her potential interviewees. You're not much for manners, or etiquitte, I take it?"

"There are more important things than manners or etiquette, in my opinion," Rita said, twirling a piece of blonde hair around her finger. She crossed one long leg over the other--she was wearing her shiny black snakeskin textured pumps today--and smoothed out her skin tight knee length hot pink skirt as she accepted the glass from Lucius. Long pink nails curled around the crystal glass. Her slightly see through black lace blouse clung to her curves (and her black bra) as she positioned herself on the chair and grinned at the couple before her. "Admittedly, my lack of has gotten me into a wee spot of trouble in the past. I trust your sensibilities are not so delicate as to be offended."

"Just get to the specifics, will you?" Narcissa demanded. "What will you be asking of us? I may yet change my mind."

"And just how, exactly, do you intend on portraying us?" Lucius added, reseating himself before taking a sip of his own drink. "We have family and careers to consider."

"Only the truth, as true to you as I can be," Rita said. "I'm a journalist at heart. I just wish to tell this story."

"And make a penny off of the rest of us," Narcissa returned.

"Don't be coy. You got quite a nice emotional trauma settlement out of the mess. I know you have nothing against making money," Rita said with a laugh.

"I'm fine with it," Lucius said. "I don't know how much time either of us can give you, however."

"If I could have two hours of your time, that would be enough to get me started. Two hours, one afternoon sometime over the next few weeks," Rita said. "We will find time."

"Easy for you to say. You have no idea what our lives are like," Narcissa replied. "Nonetheless, I have committed. We will find time, won't we Lucy?"

"Yes, I suppose we will. We won't be here for the New Year, however as we're visiting my parents, so I suggest you schedule before that," Lucius said. "Otherwise you'll be waiting."

"Noted," Rita said with a smile, and then tossed back the rest of her brandy. "Then I suppose I will be off. I'll be in touch the next day or so to set up a time. Thanks ever so."

Narcissa watched the woman's graceful move to her feet, then stood herself and tossed her hair over her shoulder fluidly. "You try too hard, Skeeter. Beauty and grace should be unconscious attributes, not deliberate attempts."

"You're a model, Narcissa. You look pretty for a living. I'm just a lowly writer," Rita said, eyes sparkling. "It is my mind and my tongue that I rely on. Not my beauty or my grace or, indeed, my sex appeal."

"Good day, Miss Skeeter," Lucius said, his tone slightly warning as he stood and put a hand on Narcissa's shoulder. The last thing Rita needed to do was insult Narcissa's intelligence, and Lucius could feel the retort boiling up in his wife. "We look forward to your call."

"Little wench," Narcissa bristled.

"Bye bye now!" Draco called as Rita let herself out.

"She's absolutely insufferable. I told you we ought not let her in," Narcissa said, glaring at the now closed door.

"She does think quite a lot of herself, doesn't she?" Lucius commented, ignoring the irony in addressing this statement to Narcissa. "Perhaps if her book is successful, some of that ego might be justified. Although I certainly doubt it would make her easier to tolerate."

"Though if you ignore the prat bit, I quite like what she said about Draco," Narcissa said with a smile. "He will be a brilliant enigma."

"How could he not be considered how he came to be? And by whom?" Lucius grinned. "A religion professor and a naughty school girl?"

Narcissa smiled at her husband, and then at little Draco, still on the floor playing with his rabbit. "Though, something must be said for her sense of style. It's hideous, of course, but she certainly has a flare of something, doesn't she?"

***

Leroy's mum, Eleanor, had always been big on Christmas, and this year it seemed as though they had a lot more to celebrate. After what had nearly happened to dear little Emmeline, Eleanor had really packed a punch to her annual family get-together, sending invitations out to her nieces and nephews and their families, all of her own siblings and their spouses, as well as her ex-husband's parents. She'd extended the invitation to Leroy's father as well, but Paul had never been much for the holiday's, and Leroy had seen him in London while the band had been on tour. Eleanor doubted he'd come all the way to Salcombe, particularly during such unpredictable weather.

But the house was decorated and twinkling red and green. The underside of the tree was stuffed with presents, and Eleanor had gotten Leroy to put the insert in the table before filling it to burst with cookies and cakes, punch and eggnog. Everyone had starting coming by at around six, and by seven the party was in full swing as people danced and sung along as Uncle Pete and Leroy played guitar and bass respectively. Auntie Enid joined in on piano, and a rousing chorus of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" began, so loudly and cheerfully that Eleanor barely heard the pounding knock at the door. Exchanging a confused look with Emmeline beside her (everyone was there! Who else might be stopping by? Surely not Paul?), Eleanor headed for the front door, opening it tentatively.

"Er, hello there," she said, not recognizing the woman on the other side. "Can I help you?"

"Season's greetings!" Rita said brightly, her red lips curling up into a red smile. She was wearing a long red coat that hung to her knees with black buckles, and beneath she wore pointy black four inch heeled boots. Beneath the dress she had a beaded black cocktail dress over some fishnets. She'd gone for classy and busty and slightly old fashioned, and she thought it had come off really well. Of course, she had to get in the door before she could take off her jacket to show it off. "I'm Rita Skeeter. I'm here to see Leroy. Goodness, it's cold out. Can I come in?"

"Oh! Well, yes dear, I'd hate for you to catch your death," Eleanor said carefully. "Leroy never mentioned he'd invited a friend today."

Rita stepped inside and dropped off her coat dramatically. "Ah, well. You know Leroy," Rita said vaguely, looking around. "Where is he, speaking of the little rascal? I'd love to say hello."

"Rita Skeeter?" Emmeline said suddenly, spotting Rita. Her voice turned from surprised to guarded as she realized Rita was likely here for a story, and Emeline tried not to jump to conclusions else anger at Rita for crashing a family function might cause a scene. "How unexpected."

"Emmeline, good to see you again," Rita said, noticing the girl's cool demeanour. "I just popped by for a quick word with Leroy."

"Leroy's just over there by the fireplace, playing music as usual," Eleanor said, pointing him out. "Can't even rest for Christmas the silly boy. But my brother Peter loves playing with him so much."

Once Rita had headed toward him with a sway of her hips, Eleanor looked curiously at Emmeline and said, "Who on Earth is that? She looks like a high-class hooker." Indeed, Rita's fishnets were catching eyes from everyone around the room, particularly the older male population. Some whistled.

"That's Rita Skeeter. She's a writer," Emmeline said. "She can be a bit pushy, though. Not that I don't trust Leroy to push back, but I think I'm going to go join him."

"All right," Eleanor said. Uncle Pete and Leroy's playing and singing came to an end then, and as everyone clapped he glanced around for Emmeline, but his line of sight was intercepted by a woman in skimpy black dress and very overdone make-up.

"Er," Leroy started, unable to stop himself from making a bit of a face at her.

"Leroy! Rita Skeeter. Pleasure," Rita said, holding out her hand.

Emmeline came up behind her, smiling, and kissed Leroy happily before he had a chance to shake her hand. It wasn't motivated by jealousy, for Emmeline was not the jealous type. She was, though, still wary of Rita's intentions in coming to a family Christmas party uninvited. "Amazing, as usual."

"Do I get one of those too, Emmeline?" Uncle Pete asked brightly.

Emmeline laughed and leaned over, pecking Leroy's uncle on the cheek. "You were also amazing, Uncle Pete."

"You're a doll, Em, humouring an old codger like me," Uncle Pete said, and then turned his attention to Rita, eyes widening a little as he took her in. "Now who're you, little lady? I don't suppose we've met before. Bit odd at a family get together."

"Oh, don't you worry. I'm not family. I'm an acquaintance of Leroy and Emmeline. I just stopped by to have a quick private word," Rita said, but made suggestions with her eyes and body language so as to send him off with hope.

"I see, I see. Well, I'll leave you lot to it then," Uncle Pete said, and smiled widely at Rita before heading out to mingle.

"Effective," Emmeline said with an amused smirk.

"Acquaintance?" Leroy questioned, confused. "This isn't really the time for a private word about... whatever it is you want to have a private word about. You know her, Em?"

"She fancied herself unofficial reporter for the Order," Emmeline informed him. "I heard from some of the others that she's writing a book."

"Indeed I am. And I need you, Leroy. I need another perspective on Stubby. He was, after all, the only casualty. That makes him far more interesting than simply a deceased band front man."

Leroy's eyebrows shot upward. "Who do you think you are?" he asked, anger evident in his tone. How dare she gate crash his family Christmas party and then talk about the Stubby like that? Stubby, his best friend since he was three, Stubby, who'd only died not even two months ago! "He's not some plot device you can just use at your own convenience, and I'm not in the Order and neither was he, and I don't intend on giving you 'perspective'. Go home, please."

Emmeline slid an arm around Leroy's waist and glared at Rita.

"I'm sorry," Rita said immediately. "I didn't mean to offend. I don't mean to offend. I'm going to talk to Marlene as well, but I need an outside voice. Look, don't you want his story to be told? I can turn him into an icon. Or help to, at the very least."

"Of course I want people to know who he was," Leroy answered. "But how can I trust you to do him justice, even with me and Marlene feeding you information? You obviously don't have any problem overstepping boundaries and overdoing things to get your point across. Stubby isn't a footnote, or a fact to scratch off of your to-do list."

"This book isn't about my point. It has nothing to do with me. I'm just writing it. It will be the truth, and largely dependent on quotes. How you speak about him will wholly colour his character," Rita said. "And I think personal experience is a little more telling than the facts, isn't it? According to the facts, he was a drug addicted asshole who drove Marlene away, and then in a desperate bid to get her back, signed up with the bad guy and got himself killed, and nearly her as well."

"You're not doing a very good job recovering from your poor first impression," Emmeline said softly. "You might do best to cut your losses and leave."

"What do you want me to say? Without opinions I can quote, I can only rely on the facts. They paint him rather black, don't you think, without much to flesh out the greys and whites? I'm a journalist, and I've never met him. I would have no choice but to stick to..."

"The facts, yes, so you've said," Emmeline finished, and sighed.

"The facts are true," Leroy said with a shrug. "But that's not who he was. It's not... you can't..." This was impossible. She was impossible. "I. Fine. I guess. I don't know. I don't want people to make assumptions about him, and if you're going to write about him no matter what I do I'd rather you at least inject a bit of truth into it."

"You will not manipulate him with the memory of his passed best friend," Emmeline said firmly. "Do you know what it is to lose someone so close to you? Do you know how constantly Stubby is on his mind? It isn't right of you to play on that."

"Who's playing?" Rita asked, watching Emmeline contemplatively. "I think I'd like to speak to you as well. You're the kind of girl who's always got her eyes open, aren't you? Why don't I talk to the both of you together? That way you can keep an eye on me, and I can get two stories at once. Sound good?"

Emmeline looked up at Leroy and said softly, "Don't agree out of a feeling of duty. Just do what you feel."

"I. Okay. If Em's there, that's fine," Leroy said, looking down at his fiancée. "That would be better."

Emmeline smiled at him, and then turned her face towards Rita, the smile hardening just a touch. "Not until after the New Year, though. We have family obligations for the holidays, and seeing as you've already crashed one party, I think we'd rather enjoy the rest."

"That's fair," Rita said, and then looked around at all the good cheer. "I don't suppose I'm invited to stay, am I? It'd make Uncle Pete so very happy."

"It's a family party," Leroy said, smiling slightly. "As much as Uncle Pete might like your cleavage, it's probably best you leave. But have a Happy Christmas."

Emmeline giggled a little at Leroy's words and disentangled herself from him. "I'll walk you out, Rita."

Rita watched as Emmeline kissed Leroy again, and then walked with the girl towards the door, picking up her jacket off of the hook she'd absently hung it on. "You're a classy bird, Emmeline."

"Thank you," Emmeline said calmly. "And you are a tactless vulture. No offence."

Rita laughed. "None taken. You're protective of him, that's all."

"He's just lost his brother," Em replied. "Of course I am."

"You're really happy though, despite it all, aren't you?" Rita asked.

Emmeline put her hand on the door handle and looked up at Rita. "Life is more than the short term. We may not be married, but we're in it for the good times and the bad. Things'll get better."

"How very balanced of you," Rita quipped and pulled on her coat. "Happy Christmas, Emmeline. I'll speak with you after the holidays."

Emmeline nodded and let the woman out, closing the door behind her and heading back to Leroy. "Well."

"She is quite possibly the most horrific and yet equally fascinating woman I've ever met," Leroy said, picking up his bass and absently strumming a few notes. "And I'm not sure I mean that in a good way."

"I agree. But forget about her. Let's enjoy the party--and the season--the best we can," Emmeline said, putting her fingers on the strings of his bass and smiling at him. "Teach me a song?"

Leroy grinned back a little shyly. "You might like this one," he said quietly, starting in on a deep but simple beat that matched the hoarse bass of his voice. He never really was much of a singer; that was always Stubby's forte. Leroy was just the man behind it all, and it still felt incredibly strange to be the last of them standing. "My body is curled, and wrapped around you. Let's not untangle ourselves from this. We should stay. We should ignore the alarm, and the daylight. Nothing else matters. It's just our tumble of feet, blankets, and heavy breathing. The day can wait. Everything can wait for you."

Emmeline's smile widened and she rested her head against his shoulders as her finger tips felt the movement of his hands and strings. She felt the eyes of his family on them, his song had drawn some attention, but she didn't care.

"When did you write that?" she asked softly, her other hand coming to rest on his hip, beneath his guitar. "It's beautiful."

"Halloween," Leroy answered. "Just after you left. I was going to play it for you at the show that night. Stubby was actually going to let me have a solo because he liked it. And then he left practice, and I left to get you for lunch."

"Oh, Leroy," she said, and her smile simply widened against his shoulder even as her eyes grew shiny with emotion. "You would've had the whole audience in the palm of your hand, just as captivated as I am."

"Well your reaction was the only one that mattered," Leroy said, kissing the side of her head gently. "It still is. It always will be. I love you, babe."

"Oh, I love you too," Emmeline replied, turning her face up for a kiss, a real kiss.

"Oh look at the dears," Eleanor exclaimed, clapping her hands together as her eyes welled up slightly. Poor Leroy had been so close to losing Emmeline, and they were all so lucky to still have her in their lives. "Bless them! You too are just so adorable, I swear."

Leroy laughed against Emmeline's mouth. His mother was something else.

Emmeline laughed as well, but raised a hand high in the air, fist clenched in a celebratory motion as she wrapped her other arm around his neck to deepen the kiss. Not obscenely, of course. She was no exhibitionist and she was with his family, but she felt so happy here with him. And after all, she was a rockstar's girlfriend.

***

Michele had starting smiling at him two days ago, and since then Edgar had been so over the moon his jaw hurt from smiling back. He and Dorcas (though she was much better at being unobvious about it) were giddy about her first Christmas, and had blown nearly a full pay check of Ed's on toys the baby really didn't need. Or wasn't aware existed. In fact, of all the plush toys they'd been given before she was born---bunnies, bears, even a little piggy--the only one Michele bothered with was the rocket Dorcas had gotten at the Baker's yardsale.

Today she was sleeping in her seat on the kitchen table between her parents and her godparents, who were having tea and cooing over how big she was getting, how she already had enough hair to stick into adorable little blonde pigtails on top of her head, and how Dorcas had finally caved in and let Edgar put her in a pink dress.

"I think her hair is trying to be curly," Hestia commented, taking a bite out of a biscuit.

"She sure is pretty, isn't she?" Aidan said, gently touching the tassle on her tiny little slippers. "Did Anna knit these for you?"

"Yeah. And of course she's cute. She's fucking gorgeous," Dorcas quipped and positioned herself on Ed's lap, sitting down perhaps a little harder than necessary and then kissing Ed quickly in apology. "She made the biscuits too. I must admit, I'm going to miss it here. She helps us out a lot."

"I swear she'll be coming to London every other weekend if Pa'll let her come," Ed said a little sadly. He was really going to miss his parents, and his siblings, and their friends, but thanks to the settlement he and Dor finally had the opportunity to go ahead and do what they wanted. They'd gone earlier in the month and found a little house for themselves, and Ed had already finished the important bits of furniture for them that they didn't already have, and as of January 15 they wouldn't be residents of Salcombe anymore. They'd be living and working in London.

After all the school Dor missed because of Halloween and the trials, she'd just put her foot down about finishing her A levels, and Edgar had to admit there didn't seem much point to stick around for them anymore, not when Mad Eye Moody was practically harassing their answering machine to get Dorcas into London and into his shop. Ed himself had decided against moving on in school, and instead had found a paid apprenticeship of his own with a custom furniture company. Before he could start his own he needed a reputation.

"We have a third bedroom, so you know you're welcome yourselves," Edgar said, trying to sound nonchalant. Of everyone besides his mother, he'd miss Aidan the most; they'd been best friends since they were kids, and Aidan's move to Kingsbridge for school had proved itself hard enough to handle after getting used to seeing and speaking with one another on a daily basis. Ed was sure he was going to rack up his and Dorcas' phone bill with long distance charges.

"Hear that, Hes? We have a free place to stay in London," Aidan said, eyes twinkling and mouth twitching as he tried to keep a straight face. "Might come in handy for house hunting in a few months."

Edgar blinked. "Wait. What?"

Hestia grinned widely. "Aidan's been offered a job with a television studio in London," she explained, looking at Aidan and beaming. "Some producer heard his voice on the radio when she was visiting family in Kingsbridge, and came over to see if Aidan had a face for television. So they're going to start him off with a few little jobs on air to see what he's best suited for, and in a year or so he might get his own show."

Looking at Aidan, dumbfounded, Edgar said, "You're. She. You'll be in London? Where we'll be?"

"Indeed we will. I'm going to be a TV star," Aidan said, grinning widely.

"Good thing I like you, Hestia," Dorcas said with a grin at the other woman. "I'll bet we'll be spending all sorts of time together. Lucky for you, I'm awesome. Hey, Bonesie, are we going to have a nanny or something if we'll both be working? We can afford one now."

"Yeah, I figured," Edgar answered, still in shock over his good fortune. Aidan and Hestia living in London. What were the odds, really? "So long as we don't become one of those couples that let the babysitter raise the kid. I want to be there for all of Chele's important stuff, and the not so important stuff too. Speaking of, when are you two going to start popping them out? Aidan told me once that he wanted his own riding troupe."

"Lets get through the wedding first," Hestia said. "Mum keeps going behind my back and trying to change the plans on me. I found out yesterday that she'd hired a caterer when we were just going to have a big barbeque. Speaking of," Hestia added, smiling wryly and coping Edgar's tone, "set a date yet, you two?"

Dorcas looked down and admired the ring on her finger. "Maybe a summer wedding. We could get rings tattooed on our fingers, what do you think, Eddie? Or maybe we could do something even more radical."

"Like what?" Aidan asked, grinning at Dorcas. "I don't know if Ed's the really radical sort, Dorcas. And you are parents now, and the parents of my god daughter, no less! Speaking of, do you think you'll get her baptised?"

"No," Dorcas said immediately. "When she gets old enough, she can choose her own religion. Right Bonesie?"

Edgar nodded. "God father and mother are more like 'titles' anyway. We don't expect you to help guide her spiritual journey in life or anything. You're her guardians if something happens to us, and can spoil her all you like, pretty much."

"Well that won't be a problem," Hestia said. "I'm fairly sure anyone who meets her is going to fall head over heels in love with her."

"Don't tell me that," Ed grinned. "I don't want to be walking behind her for the rest of her life with a scowl on my face and a bat in my hand."

"Oh, come on Daddy Bones," Dorcas teased. "Once she grows up, she'll be hot like me. You're going to have to watch your daughter date one day. Oh, I can't wait until she gets big."

Aidan laughed and shook his head. "You're something else, Dorcas."

"She's not allowed to grow up, sorry," Edgar said, suddenly feeling a little overwhelmed by the thought of his little girl dating boys, and the ideas boys had, and how he and his friends acted when they were younger. "Fuck. I'm doomed, aren't I?"

"Those are the woes of being a parent, or so I'm told," Hestia said. "I certainly don't want a daughter like myself. I was the weirdest child... personally I think I'd be better with boys anyway."

"I grew up with girls. Three sisters," Aidan said with a grin. "I did enough glaring and threatening and honour defending. Least I know how boys work. You've got a task ahead of you, man."

"You say it like it's a chore. It's going to be fucking fantastic," Dorcas said with a grin, smile turning soft as she looked down at her daughter, smoothing her hair affectionately. "She's ours. We get to raise her. She is our little bundle of twenty-four hours a day seven days a week responsibility. We're going to do a good job, though. Aren't we, Rocket?"

Realizing she was damn near cooing at her daughter in public, Dorcas looked up at the others sheepishly and wrinkled her nose.

"Babies, you know. I'm still bad ass. Just... not all the time," Dorcas explained jokingly.

"Ugh, what's it like to still be a badass?" Hestia asked, grinning. "I trailed off somewhere after fifteen. This girl," she explained, pointing at herself, "got James Potter to pose in her thong one New Years Eve. And now here I am getting married and planning to buy a house. Is it just me or is everyone growing up too fast?"

"Love and babies and not going to school anymore'll do that to you," Edgar replied. "I don't know that I even think about how old I'm going to be next. I figure I've got at least fifteen years before my hair starts to recede and I'll have something worth panicking over."

Dorcas looked shocked by the talk of aging, and ran her fingers through Ed's hair contemplatively before saying, "Don't worry, you'll still make me hot, sexy man." The doorbell rang, then, and Dorcas got up to go answer it. "Are your parents expecting anyone?"

"Not that I know of," Edgar answered, leaning back in his chair and trying to peer out the window. He'd been so paranoid since Halloween. "Be careful, Dor."

Dor smiled at him in what she hoped was a reassuring way, but she did check to make sure the baseball club was still next to the door. She peered through the peep hole and then grinned and threw the door open. "Wow. Hookers canvass door to door now? Thanks, but everyone here is sexually satisfied. Anna and Joe even still get it on."

"You know, I like you," Rita said, smirking. "You're spicy. My name is Rita Skeeter. I want to ask you and Mr. Bones a few questions."

"Do you now," Dorcas said, not moving to let her in, instead leaning casually against the doorframe and getting a good eyeful of her outfit. Her long sleeved, tight, bright blue off the shoulder dress hung to thigh high, and her tall, cuffed, above the knee brown leather boots came nearly high enough to meet its hemline.

"Let a girl in. It's freezing, and I left my jacket in my car," Rita said, pushing messily curled hair back behind her ear.

"Fine," Dorcas said, and then opened the door. "Guys, we have company, and she's slutty."

"Rita Skeeter? Ooh, what a pleasure!" Hestia said in surprise. She'd seen Rita around Salcombe (the woman wasn't exactly easy to miss), and when she'd first come to Salcombe, Hesia’d had to endure Gideon and Fabian's complaining about her rag, and her bad taste in clothing. "I've heard a lot about you. Is it true you castrate professionally?"

"I've got my doubts you're selling cookies," Edgar said, turning to look at Rita. As much as she made him uncomfortable, however, he still couldn't forget his manners and asked, "Tea or something?"

"Sure, I'd love a cuppa. Cute kid," Rita replied, sitting down next to Hestia and turning to face her, whispering loudly, "And every rumour starts in truth. Pleasure to meet you. What's your name?"

"She's Hestia. I'm Dorcas, that's Aidan, and Ed just went to get you a mug for tea," Dorcas said. "Seriously, what'd you come for? As much as Hestia seems excited for your company, I'm a little confused."

"I'm writing a book about, you know," Rita said, waiving her hand generally. "The whole mess. And I want to interview you and Ed. It's pretty much a miracle you didn't drown. And your parents are the only parents I'd really worry about suing me, so I need you on my side."

Dorcas laughed. "My parents won't sue you. I don't even talk to my parents. They don't give a shit."

"Sirius told me you'd been to see him," Edgar said, coming back into the kitchen and handing Rita her cup before sitting back down. "And we're not going to be around, sorry. We're moving next month."

"Oh. Where to?" Rita asked, disappointed but still determined. She could get it in before the end of the month, she was sure.

"London," Dorcas said, sitting back down once more on Ed's lap.

Rita grinned. "Oh really."

"You look like the cat that caught the canary," Aidan quipped.

"I've arranged for a flat in London. Closer to my publisher, and a better writing environment. I'm too old to live with my father anyway," Rita said with a grin. "Looks like we're going to be nice and close."

"Well," Edgar said with a considering breath. "I suppose we can't turn you down until we've heard you out. I don't think that'd be very 'working class sex machine' of me."

"Oh, you read that little gem, did you?" Rita said with a grin. "Well, you are tasty. Isn't he?"

"Of course he is. And he's mine," Dorcas said with a smirk.

"You're cute too. Aidan, was it?" Rita said, giving him a casually contemplative sort of look.

"My fiancée," Hestia said with a smug smile, crossing her arms and quirking an eyebrow.

"While we're all getting possessive..." Edgar said as Michele woke up in her chair and started sniffling. Dorcas moved so he could reach for her and take her in his arms, soothing her.

"Down girls," Rita said with a smile. "So what do you say? Sit down and talk to me about the Order for my book? A bunch of people have already agreed. The Prewett brothers for starters, and Sirius and Remus too. Bless them, they answered the door wet and towel clad. The Potters and the Malfoys have signed on, and the rockstar and his girl, Leroy and Emmeline. But of all the murder attempts, I think yours was most dramatic. And I think I'll get some really great quotes. What do you say?"

Dorcas sat in the chair next to Ed, watching him with Chele for a moment. They were all okay, but after what they went through, Dorcas kind of wanted to spread the story. Not for fame, though she wouldn't mind a bit of that either, but because what they'd all endured felt like an accomplishment now that it was done. They'd lived through it.

"I'm in," Dorcas said firmly, and then looked over at Ed. "What do you think, Bonesie?"

"Okay," Edgar said with a nod. "I think it's important for people to really understand what happened though, not the dramatics and bullshit the papers cooked up. They manipulated a lot of what we said to make it work for themselves. I trust you're looking to tell it like it is?"

"I won't manipulate anything. I'll only use what I'm given. That's the thing about writing for real. Just because it's going to be creative non-fiction rather than journalism doesn't mean I can take any more liberties with the facts. It's nothing like Detail Oriented. Why do you think I want to talk to everyone? In all honesty, I just want to show the human element. The real human element. That's what makes it interesting," Rita rambled, pausing to sip her tea. "Besides. You guys are all icons. This is an internationally known story. There's never been a villain like Riddle before. So far as I can tell, I'm going to be producing the only official literature on the event."

"Holy fuck you talk a lot," Dorcas said. "That was pretty much a yes or no question, Rita."

Rita smiled at Dorcas and said, "That's the brilliant thing about the world, isn't it? Nothing's just yes or no or black and white."

"Are we international icons?" Edgar asked, amused. "That explains why Carter and Co. refused my application three times because they thought it was fake. I had to drive up to London and give it to them in person before they believed it was actually me. I'm not sure I could handle being famous. That's why Aidan's going to be a television star and not me."

"Not to mention you're severely lacking in the 'cowboy charm' department," Hestia teased. "What was it she said exactly, Aidan?"

"Home grown salt of the earth with cowboy charm oozing through his pores and muscles to match or some bollocks like that," Aidan said with a grin. "I stuck my hands in my pockets and she just about wet herself over what she called my 'aw shucks' face."

"Too fucking cute," Dorcas snickered. "Let's see it then. Do the aw shucks face, cowboy."

"If he moonlighted as a serial killer, all he'd have to do is that 'aw shucks' face and everyone would forget what they were mad at," Edgar said. "Like that time he used it on Ma after he put a baseball through the kitchen window."

"You played baseball?" Hestia asked, surprised.

"No," Edgar answered, bouncing Michele slightly. "But we threw them at one another."

"How utterly boyish," Rita commented, smiling.

"Aidan! Do the 'aw shucks' face!" Dorcas demanded again, laughing.

"I can't just do it on command!" Aidan said, blushing just a little even as he laughed.

"Hey now, leave my big, strong farm boy alone," Hestia said, biting her bottom lip before leaning in and kissing Aidan softly on the cheek.

Aidan's blush deepened a little and he looked over at Hestia, looking pleased and a little sheepish.

"Aw, shucks!" Dorcas crowed. "There it is. Though it's a little more lovesick than the one he gave to the producer, I'm willing to bet."

"Shut up," Aidan said good-naturedly and kissed Hestia square on the mouth.

Edgar laughed. "There's not a man I know who's not completely whipped by his girlfriend. Or boyfriend, in Sirius' case."

"They're whipped by one another," Hestia commented, pulling out of her and Aidan's kiss, but still looking at him. "Or perhaps whip one another literally. You can never tell with Remus."

"Remus Lupin? Into BDSM?" Rita snorted. "I highly doubt it."

"How many times have you met him?" Dorcas challenged. "There is more than meets the eye to that bloke. You should hear some of the stories."

"You should've been at their wedding party," Edgar said. "The only good thing about being the only two sober people at that particular event is that we got the best pictures. Have you ever wondered what Sirius and Remus might look like in women's knickers?"

Rita grinned. "Can I see these photos? You know. Just for research purposes."

"I think that's probably a very bad idea, considering you're publishing a book about the people involved, and 'people' happens to include both of them," Aidan said practically. "Wouldn't want you to get tempted to put them in the book."

"Fucking do it," Dorcas cackled. "You have to."

"Love to, but I'd have to get them to sign release forms," Rita said.

"I'm sure you could do it. You've convinced nearly everyone to be in your book, haven't you?" Hestia asked.

"I dunno," Edgar said, shaking his head. "I mean, some of those pictures are far, far beyond Remus' normal 'I'm embarrassed' standards."

"I can try, at the very least," Rita said with a smile. "If they're worth it."

"Oh, they are," Dorcas snickered. Chele started to fuss in Ed's arms, and Dorcas reached for her. "She's probably hungry. Avert your eyes, Aidan. I've got to preserve my modesty."

"I keep telling him that it's a perfectly natural thing, but unless they're mine he doesn't want to see nipples," Hestia said. "I guess I should be glad for that, shouldn't I?"

Dorcas rolled her eyes and lifted her shirt, smirking as Aidan blushed. "Isn't it fantastic? I got all sorts of dirty looks for not dressing properly, but now that I'm a mom, I can practically take my top off in public and it's okay because it's 'perfectly natural' or what the fuck ever. I fucking love it."

"Dorcas Meadows, exhibitionist. Noted," Rita quipped. "Aidan, scared of breasts."

"I'm not scared of breasts," Aidan protested. "I love boobs. Just... Hestia's in particular."

"Well I do have rather nice boobs," Hestia said. "The Jones women are all very well endowed in that department."

"I can't speak for all of them, but for this Jones in particular, I can definitely agree," Aidan said, grinning, and draping an arm around her shoulder, and gesturing at her chest. "Not scared of these boobs."

***

"Seriously, Skeeter, fuck off!" Marlene said as she stepped out of the swimming pool and headed for the bus stop.

She'd been avoiding Rita Skeeter for damn near a week now. The woman wouldn't leave her alone, and Marlene had no interest in indulging the woman who'd publicised all of their names and complicated life so much for Gideon and Fabian and the rest of the core. She knew most of them had agreed to help with the book Skeeter was writing, but Marlene didn't want to, and she was annoyed that Rita wouldn't take no for an answer.

"You're not letting me explain, good lord," Rita called after her, exasperated, clacking after Marlene in snakeskin boots that were doing little to keep her toes warm against the December air. "You're worse than Narcissa Malfoy. At least I got a drink out of her before it was all said and done."

"I'm not interested, okay?" Marlene said. "You have enough people involved. You don't need me. Gideon can tell you all about what happened to me," Marlene said, walking briskly to the bus stop, and then waiting. It was too cold to walk home and her hair was still damp. She was already chilled.

"It's not just about what happened to you," Rita said, her own patience wearing thin. "It's about everyone, you know, a collective sort of thing? And I need your perspective on Stubby. I have Leroy on board to help, and you know he wants the same thing for Stubby that you do."

"So you have him to explain about Stubby. You don't need me," Marlene repeated, sticking her hands into her coat pockets and wishing she'd brought her scarf today, or else dried her hair all the way.

"I can't immortalize a man with one perspective. Leroy can't tell me everything that made him who he was, Marlene," Rita pressed. "He wanted everyone to know who he was, right? I don't want to give people the wrong impression with this book. This is not self-serving bullshit, I swear to my knickers."

Marlene looked at her, for the first time actually considering the woman beyond what she already knew of her. She seemed sincere, but Marlene wasn't quite convinced. "And I'm the only one who can share the gory details of his death first hand, right? You don't want insight into who Stubby was. You want to know what he said to me before he died, or what his favourite sexual position was. I've had enough reporters trying to get shit out of me just because they want the details on the late great Stubby Boardman. That's not immortalizing him. That's just selling him out, and I won't do that."

"Look. I'm going to be frank here," Rita said, looking straight at Marlene and refusing to break eye contact. "This is not me trying to pry as many 'gory details' out of you as I possibly can. I want to flesh him out. I want to make him tick for the rest of the world. Sure it's about details, I'm not going to lie. But it's what you know about him, and what you experienced through him that'll help me do him justice. I want to do him, and the rest of you, justice. Please, help me do that."

"Oh, quit begging, you annoying woman," Marlene said. "Just give me a ride home. I'll think about it, okay?"

"Fabulous! Come on then, I'm over here," Rita said, unable to mask her glee at Marlene at least considering being interviewed.

Marlene saw the car and couldn't help but smile a little, however grudgingly. "Nice. Killer on gas though, I bet."

Rita shrugged. "It gets me from point A to point B," she said. "Albeit loudly."

Marlene climbed in and looked in the back seat. It was a mess, and contained what seemed to be more pairs of shoes than Marlene even had in her closet at home. Smirking, Marlene asked, "Shoe fetish much?"

"I like to have options," Rita answered cheerfully, turning her key in the ignition. "One never knows when one might needs boots over flats, or when pumps might be more appropriate than stilettos."

Marlene shook her head and then turned up the heat as Rita pulled out of the parking lot. There was no point giving her directions; she already knew Marlene was staying with Gideon as Rita had showed up an annoying amount of times the past few days to try and get Marlene to talk to her. Maybe it was the cold or maybe it was just out of annoyance that gave in this time, but now that Marlene had broken down and heard a little of what Rita had to say, she couldn't help but think Rita was just a woman. She was nothing sinister. Maybe there'd be no harm in doing an interview with her. So far as Marlene had heard, no one had turned her down. And it really would be a good chance to get the truth out about Stubby. The bare facts weren't all that encouraging, and Marlene wanted to 'flesh him out' too, as Rita had said. He certainly needed fleshing out.

"I'll do the interview on one condition," Marlene said suddenly. "I get to veto any questions I like, and you don't get to push."

"Done," Rita agreed without a second thought. Somehow she figured that before it was all over, there'd be no reasons to push between them, and hopefully no reasons to hold back. "You won't regret this. I intend to be honest, not a self-indulgent farce."

"So you keep saying. I'll believe it when I see it," Marlene said, and noticed Rita was chewing gum. "Hey, can I have some gum?"

"Sure, just pop open the glove compartment," Rita instructed. "Another of my many addictions."

Marlene did as instructed, and was pleased to see Juicyfruit. That was her favourite gum too. "I don't get why everyone likes the mint gum. This stuff is so much tastier. I see you also have the essentials of handcuffs and condoms. Well stocked glove compartment."

"Best to be prepared for anything," Rita said with a grin. "You never know when you're going to have to fuck an answer out of someone."

***

Leroy furrowed his eyebrows. "So. Elphias treated you all like shit because of his dad?" he asked, a little confused. "What else did Fabian say, babe?"

"Honestly, I think it was more a falling out between Fabian and Elphias that translated to the rest of the Order. In any case, whatever was going on was no excuse, but we're going to just treat it like it's a new beginning," Emmeline said. "I just wanted to explain because I'm sure there's going to be a bit of tension."

"I thought we were supposed to be, like the high maintenance guests. You know, being that we're the bloody musicians," Benjy said, grinning. "He sounds like a ruddy diva."

"He never was," Sirius said with a shrug. "Bit rude, but I think that used to be one of the requirements to join the Order."

It was James and Lily's (now dubbed) annual Christmas party, and the difference between the scene the previous year, and the calm conversation taking place now was quite noticeable. By this time last year, people were shagging in the bathroom, drunk, and the Hobbled Gordons were previewing their first then yet-to-be-released single for everyone to hear. The group that had already arrived (James and Lily, obviously, Sirius and Remus, Edgar and Dorcas, Leroy and Emmeline, Dale and Ben, Aidan and Hestia, and James' work friend Sturgis) were seated in the living room with snacks on the coffee table, and wine and beer, but they were chatting more then they were drinking and eating while Christmas music played softly in the background.

"Then why'd they let Remus in?" Edgar asked teasingly.

"Something about sandwiches," Sirius answered, grinning, slinging an arm around Remus' shoulder. "Or it might've had something to do with Evans and I pestering the shit out of Gid and Fay until they agreed to meet him."

Remus rolled his eyes. "I like trees, actually. I mean, that's the reason. That's also one of the first things I ever said to Sirius and James."

"Oh yeah! I remember that! We bowled him over in the stairwell, suitcases and all, and I was possibly dying on the floor while the two of them carried out a casual conversation about trees," James laughed. "Pricks."

"Maybe it was love at first sight and they just didn't know it yet. You can't hold that against them," Emmeline teased.

"Oh, I can! Can't you tell I still hate them both?" James said, rolling his eyes. "Seriously though. It's going to be really weird to see Elphias again. What stage of healing is he at? I mean, he was crushed by a rockslide. Think he's well enough for Pads and me to re-initiate him?"

"He still has a cast," Lily said. "I ran into his mother in the supermarket this afternoon. She said he's quite irritated about still having to use crutches."

"Oh, I meant to ask," Hestia interjected suddenly. "How's Frank doing with the sign language? Every time we go over to pay them a visit they're not at home."

"He's picking it up really fast, actually," James said. "They even started teaching Neville a few bits already. I swear, they're the most well-adjusted people I've ever met."

"Agreed. It almost makes me wonder if they pretend to be okay more than they actually are okay, but they just seem so genuine," Remus mused.

Coming back into the room, Dorcas sat down next to Edgar and smiled. "You'll all be happy to hear I'm just worry too fucking much and Rocket is sound asleep and happy. God, that's it. I'm supposed to be having fun. No one let me anywhere near a phone for the rest of the fucking night."

"Susan hasn't tried to decorate her with tinsel again, has she?" Edgar asked. He was just as paranoid about leaving Michele for the first time, and quite frankly wanted every reassurance that could be offered to him.

"No. Everything's fine. She didn't cry too much after we left, she went to sleep okay once she got her bottle, there were no mishaps of any sort, she's perfectly safe, and yes, Anna double checked the baby monitor. It's working. I asked. Twice," Dorcas said sheepishly. "Fuck me, children are exhausting."

"You'll get used to it. I promise," James said. "You'll never stop worrying, but it'll stop tiring you out so much in a year or so."

"I can't believe you all have kids," Sturgis piped up suddenly. "I couldn't imagine it. And I'm older than you lot, too."

"Older in years, Sturge my man, but I'm so way more mature than you," James said, reaching over to muss his boss' hair. He and Sturgis had become great friends over the year. Sturgis had even sent a baker's basket as a get well gift, with all sorts of fresh pastries and cheese bread and other goodies. Much better than flowers.

"James, if you're mature, then I'll eat my left foot," Sirius said. "A husband, yes. A good dad, yes. Mature? I'm afraid that doesn't explain you tackling me during our snowball fight yesterday and trying to haul off my trousers. That's Remus' job."

"That's ridiculous, is what that is," Lily said, rolling her eyes. "Sometimes I worry if we're traumatizing Harry. He overheard James and Sirius talking about sex, and yesterday while he was eating supper he looked at us and said 'Mama and Dada have sex?' We can't figure out what he thinks it means, but I'm a little worried who he might ask next."

"Watch him ask James' parents," Leroy said. "That'll be an interesting phone call for you."

"Leroy, you're forgetting that my mother raised me and Sirius. I don't think she gets shocked that easily," James said, putting an arm around Lily. "She caught us necking in the kitchen on one Salcombe weekend, and she just told us not to leave marks because Grandma was coming and could we please move so she could get at the oven mitts to check the lasagne."

"Your mother is amazing. I've met her a couple times, and I've always been blown away," Emmeline said with a smile.

"Yeah, she's that sort," Sirius said, smiling. "You know she was the first person to catch Remus and I. We were in the downstairs linen closet and all she did was grin and ask for sheets."

"I think we all owe her big thank yous for what she's done over the years," Remus tagged on.

"Cor, I've never wanted to meet someone's mum before. You lot are ruddy saps," Benjy piped up.

"Oh, Ben, was your drumstick still there?" Emmeline asked. "Sorry for the abrupt subject change. He went back to the Three Drumstics today to see if they'd kept the one he'd stuck in the ceiling."

"Yeah! They've plastered around it to keep it in the ceiling, and brought out a ladder so I could write my autograph next to it," Ben said with a laugh. "They want Dale and Leroy to go in and sign too."

"Good to know some things'll always stay the same," Leroy said, smiling. "I broached the last demo to The Ministry and they agreed to release it for us," he added. "So The Hobbled Gordons'll have one more single, and that'll be that."

"I have some in studio footage and photos from the last few sessions. You can put it on as bonus material, if you'd like," Emmeline said. "I have this clip from when Stubby and Ben had that twinky eating contest, and then they started laughing and sprayed half chewed mush all over Dale's keyboard, and then Stubby ate if off again just so he could win the contest. That'd be cute to include."

"Fucking hilarious," Dorcas said with a grin. "I wish I could've done a tattoo for him."

"Dude, we should get fuckin' tribute tattoos!" Ben said excitedly. "Not just to Stubby. Just... for everything that the Hobbled Gordons represented, man. Like, a severed foot!"

"A severed foot?" Lily asked, confused. "Why on Earth... Oh! Hobbling! Good lord, you couldn't come up with something a little less grotesque?"

"I still have my upper back left," Leroy said. "I'm thinking of finishing the piece with a good picture of the band. If I didn't get inked for Stubby he'd come back just to kick my arse."

"Yeah, dude, a tattoo'd really do it. Hey, Em, would you want to arrange a sleeve for me?" Dale asked, looking at his left arm with consideration. "A little something from each leg of the year, maybe."

"I'm but a lowly photographer. Dorcas is the artist," Emmeline said with a smile. "She's going to be apprenticing under Mad Eye Moody."

"No!" Ben gasped. "The Mad Eye?"

"Yeah. The fucking Mad Eye. He's coming tonight, him and Figgy, his bookkeeper slash tattoo parlour manager," Dorcas said.

"No fucking way!" Dale said in shock. "Dorcas. Babe. Hook me up?"

There was a slight knock on the door before it opened and Frank, Alice and Aidan trailed in, dusting the snow off of their shoulders. "Hello, everyone!" Frank said, he and Alice both moving their hands in the same way to indicate "Hello" in sign language. "It's really starting to come down out there."

"Hey guys!" James said brightly, and attempted an awkward 'hello, how are you?' in sign language.

Alice smiled and gave an enthusiastic thumbs up and pulled out her notepad and wrote, 'Not deaf, James!' followed by a smiley face.

Remus laughed. "We're all trying to learn, nonetheless. So you don't have to write all the time."

"They carried whole silent conversations on the way here in the car," Aidan said. "I was impressed how much they knew already. I had no clue what they were saying, and I wouldn't have even if I'd been watching them the whole time instead of the road."

Sirius signed 'Sex' and grinned widely at Alice as he waggled his eyebrows.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Honestly, that's all you think about, isn't it?" she tutted, and then, with some difficulty, signed 'Happy Christmas' to Alice.

Alice's smile widened even further at the efforts of her friends and she couldn't help but get a little watery at the eyes as she signed 'thank you' in return.

"You lot are bloody amazing," Ben said, sounding awed. "Wish I had friends like you. This lot are all wankers. Except Em and Gnarly Marly. But Leroy and Dale? Cor, bloody cunt rags, they are."

"Hello Pot, I'm Kettle," Leroy said with a smile, and then signed, 'You look lovely' to Alice before adding, "My cousin Aubrey is deaf."

"Well, I don't know any sign language except the universal ones, but I'd never say something so rude to a lady, so please forgive my lack of helpful hand moements!" Sturgis said with a smile. "We met last year, I think. I'm Sturgis Podmore."

"Sorry Sturge. Forgot it's been a year since you'd have seen them, seeing as how I see you every day," James said. "Sturgis, that's Frank and Alice and Aidan."

"'Lo," Aidan said with a smile and made his way to Hestia's side. "I was drunk as a skunk last year. Don't remember meeting you at all."

"Ha, yeah, and Gideon had to drag your sorry arse home," Sirius said, amused. "Your mum tried to force him in for a bit of pie as a thank you. By the way? You are the funniest drunk, cowboy."

"You're the funniest cross dresser," Edgar said, earning a roar of laughter from everyone who'd either been at the wedding party, or who'd seen the pictures. "You just couldn't pull off the garter belt like Remus could."

Remus turned pink and hid an embarrassed smile in his wine glass as he took a sip.

"Oh, what, no comment, Remus? You seemed pretty keen on the lace that night," Dorcas snickered. "What was it he said again? About the garters?"

"Fashinating thins, aren' they, garters?" James said, slurring his words exaggeratedly in imitation. "I'm gon take them off 'im with my teeth later."

Remus made a humiliated sound in the back of his throat and brought a hand up to cover his eyes. He didn't even have an excuse he could give. He had taken it off with his teeth later. While at the party, in front of everyone.

"Leave him alone," Aidan said, good-natured. "How come his 'aw shucks' face doesn't work on you lot when mine does?"

"Because his has kinky secrets behind it," James said practically. "You're straight laced innocence, cowboy."

"Well Aidan's taken things off with his teeth before, haven't you lovely?" Hestia asked, giving her fiancée an amused look.

Aidan blushed a little and looked oddly innocent as he answered, "Well. Least never while standing on a table with people snapping photos and both hands firmly on your arse."

"Please, stop!" Remus pleaded.

"I wonder if we could all get together once in our lives without the conversation turning to sex at least twenty times," Lily said shaking her head, but she was smiling, and leaned into James as she took a sip of her wine.

"Come on. Even Harry asks about sex," James joked. "It's unavoidable."

"It's okay, we all like sex," Ben said, and waggled his eyebrows at the room in general. "Depressingly, you're all married and engaged and committed. Freaks."

Em laughed. "Actually, Rita Skeeter is coming. She's single. I'll introduce you."

Hestia giggled. "There is something about that woman I find completely fascinating," she said. "She is strange and absurd and yet oddly wonderful, and I kind of want to hug her and then take her shopping."

Sirius blinked at her. "Er. Okay. I guess I'm the only person in the room who was sexually abused by her for three months before finding out her name."

"She's fucking awesome. Such a slut," Dorcas said with a laugh. "I want her to take me shopping. I don't know where she finds her clothes. They're fucking brilliant."

"Just out of curiosity, how come you decided not to dye your hair back to red now that you're not pregnant anymore? Or have you just not had the time?" Em asked.

Dorcas shrugged. "I don't know. The blonde kind of suits me, don't you think? And I match Bonesie and Rocket this way."

"You aren't really going to call her Rocket, are you?" James asked, raising his eyebrows at her.

"There's nothing wrong with giving her a nickname, James," Lily admonished quietly. "And it's definitely no worse than Sirius calling Harry 'Twerp'."

"He likes it," Sirius said with a shrug.

"He doesn't know what it means, Sirius," Lily replied, amused.

"Besides, Rocket likes being called Rocket. It's her middle name and her favourite plushie," Dorcas said, not feeling at all defensive. She was Michele's mother, and she could call her whatever she pleased. She didn't think James was really having a go at her anyway.

There was a knock at the door, then, and a voice hollered, "Happy holidays! Shit, this place is so bloody picket fence..."

Dorcas jumped to her feet and all but ran to get the door. "Mad Eye! Figgy! Come the fuck in! Everyone, this is Mad Eye. He's going to tattoo my rocket for me, speaking of."

"Evening, everyone!" Arabella said cheerfully, pulling off her mittens. "Good to see some of you again. Happy Christmas!"

Dale hopped to his feet and moved toward Moody like some starstruck fangirl, reaching to shake his hand before the older man had realized what was happening, all the while grinning like a lunatic. "Sir. Sir. You're work. It's like, legendary, dude. I know you're real into inking the famous people, and I play in this band maybe you've heard of us, the Hobbled Gordons? Yes, no? I would be honoured to have you tattoo me man. Totally. Like. Wow." He'd been talking so fast he'd rendered himself breathless, and he was still shaking Moody's hand furiously. "You are my biggest fan."

"Er, Dale?" Leroy said quietly. "I think he thinks you're batshit insane now."

"Seriously, dude," Ben snickered and elbowed Dale before turning his attention to Mad Eye. "What's up, man? So I want, like, this severed foot, right..."

"Guys, guys, guys," Mad Eye said, voice perpetually slurred and hips perpetually swaying from years of drug use. "You think that I care. And I don't. Talk to Figgy or Dorcas. They're my ladies."

Dorcas grinned as Mad Eye draped an arm around her and Figgy's shoulders before planting sloppy wet kisses on both of their cheeks.

Ducking away from them, he moved into the room and motioned for Figgy to follow. "We brought alcohol. Come on, Figgy, let's get fucked up."

"Fucking worship me," Dorcas said, arranging both hands into the rock symbol and making a face at Dale and Ben.

"Dorcas," Dale practically begged.

"This is getting painful to watch," Leroy said laughing. "Where'd your bollocks go, Dale?"

"His pussy ate them," Sirius answered, sounding bored. "Seriously though, last year this time I'm pretty sure I was macking up on Remus' neck with little regard to propriety..." he trailed off, seeming to consider his own words for a moment before turning his head to grin at Remus before ducking to his husbands' neck and proceeding to recreate the previous party.

Remus made a strangled sort of sound, and James quickly reached out and took his wine glass from him. Remus turned an interesting mixture of surprised, uncomfortable, and turned on, but even as the first one faded and the second became prevalent, Remus couldn't quite bring himself to push Sirius away.

"I'm really not drunk enough for this, Sirius," Remus said instead, resting a hand on Sirius' shoulder just in case Remus did after all decide to separate Sirius from his position latched onto Remus neck.

"Dorcas, hello. Pay attention to us. We love you, baby. We need you. We worship you madly. Get us in," Ben pleaded. "Giant severed foot. Sweet, right? Get us in! Dale will get on his knees and beg."

"Bonesie, your fiancée is being offered sexual favours. Aren't you going to do anything?" Dorcas called teasingly to Ed.

"I could give you some advice, I suppose," Edgar grinned gamely. "Don't let anyone go sucking on your nipples. You've a two month old daughter to feed."

"Great. Fat lot of fucking help you are," Dorcas replied, but she was smiling. "I'll talk to him, okay boys? You owe me."

Dale and Benjy both whooped and punched each other in celebration.

Lily sighed in defeat, and looking at James said, "Want to shag? We might as well join in on this Festive Eve of Being Sexually Distracted."

James grinned and rolled his eyes. "We're the hosts, Lily. We can't disappear. My parents have Harry all morning tomorrow, though. We can probably stay in bed until noon!"

"Speaking of sex. When's that Rita bird arriving? The hot, slutty, crazy one?" Ben asked with a grin.

"I haven't the foggiest," Lily said. "She runs on her own schedule, that one."

"She seemed interested in including your wedding party pictures in her book, Remus, Sirius," Edgar said. "Me, Dor, Hes and Aidan encouraged her to badger you until you let her, of course."

"Too right," Hestia grinned.

"What?" Remus asked, a little distracted thanks to Sirius. "Our... definitely not. No wedding party photos."

"Aw, come on. I think that's a great idea. Don't be a spoil sport now, Moony," James pushed.

"Sirius could snog him into agreeing," Edgar suggested. "Providing he agrees himself."

"Don't care," Sirius murmured against Remus' neck, and then, following Edgar's train of thought, moved his lips to Remus' mouth and took it from there.

Remus made a muffled sound into Sirius' mouth, and then pulled away. "You do realize I'm never going to agree, don't you?"

"My, my, this is saucy," Mad Eye said, stepping back into the room and taking in Remus and Sirius. "Mm, I do so like boys."

James' eyes widened a little and he shot a little, amused smile at Lily behind Mad Eye's back.

As though he'd seen it, Mad Eye shot a lecherous sort of look at James, winking extravagantly.

"Hello!" Marlene called then as she pushed the door open. "So sorry we're late. Did we miss anything memorable?"

"Just some snogging and suggestive conversation, nothing out of the ordinary," Hestia said.

"Dale has lost his bollocks," Leroy added.

"Well that's quite a feat considering he didn't have any to begin with," Gideon said, standing back as he held the door open for Fabian, Elphias and Caradoc.

"My bollocks are hardly a decent topic of conversation," Dale grumbled.

"Hey guys. Look who's back," Fabian said brightly, and winced at the annoyingly overly cheery tone of his own voice.

Elphias rolled his eyes as he manoeuvred himself to a chair and leaned his crutches against the arm. "Hey everyone."

There was a tiny beat of awkward silence and then James said, "Hey Elphias. Glad to see you're on the road to okay. It's been ages, what've you been up to?"

"Being a prick to other people for a while instead of to you lot, I expect," he said with a sigh. "I owe you all apologies. I assume Fabian ran damage control for me?"

Fabian smiled sheepishly. "Well, someone had to explain why'd you'd been more of an idiot than usual, seeing as you hadn't bothered to tell anyone what was going on."

"Over and done now," Gideon said, shutting the door. "There are more important things to get annoyed over in life than shit that happened nearly a year ago."

"Mary insisted I bring fruit cake for the lot of you," Caradoc said, walking around and setting the tin on the coffee table.. "Since I've told her I'm leaving next month she's been sending me baked goods up the wazoo. So if you're craving carrot cake over the holidays particularly, I'm the bloke to see."

"Can I get annoyed over the fact he brought fruit cake instead of carrot cake?" Sirius asked Gideon, settling back on the couch again and leaning into Remus. "Or anything else for that matter?"

"Go for it," Gideon laughed, and Caradoc rolled his eyes.

"I should've been more specific," he said. "If you're craving stale carrot cake, I'm the bloke to see. The fruit cake, surprisingly, does not taste like a horse's arse."

"Fruit cake is never a big treat though, however non-horse-arse-y it tastes," James said.

Alice scribbled 'I'm sure it's lovely', and underlined lovely a bunch of times before adding, 'Thanks, Caradoc.'

Fabian laughed a little at Alice's obvious attempt to teach them all manners. "We're beyond hope, Alice. Besides, you love our unruliness."

"You're welcome," Caradoc said to Alice, taking off his jacket and seating himself.

"So how's the house hunting in LA going?" Edgar asked. "Any luck with the realtors yet, Gid?"

"Yeah, fucking finally," Gideon answered, blowing his hair out of his eyes as he sat in an armchair and pulled Marlene into his lap. "She's sent us pictures of a few places we could afford. And a few we couldn't unless we wanted to put down all of our savings, and the settlement on top of it. Kin likes this one that's right on the water. Huge balcony."

"But, it's ridiculously expensive still, and it'll be way more practical for us to be a little closer to downtown for all of the casting calls and things Gid is going to be doing," Marlene added. "I can commute to beaches. Or wherever. I'm supposed to be starting my PDT course in early spring, so."

"That's so exciting. You guys are going to have such a wonderful time in LA," Remus said with a smile, his arm now comfortably around Sirius and cheeks still flushed. "And we're all going to have to come visit you."

"Yeah, between this settlement and the one from that dead uncle of yours, you two are fucking set," Dorcas said, and then smirked. "Well. We're all fucking set. That settlement is nothing compared to the ones we got this time around. I mean, fuck. We're all damn near millionaires now."

"It's sort of mind boggling," Aidan said with a smile. "Don't get me wrong. I wouldn't want to switch places with you considering all the shit you went through, but Christ. That's quite a cushion. You could live off that, probably almost your whole lives if you wanted to."

"It definitely makes things easier," Edgar agreed. "I mean, I had quite a chunk of change saved up aside from that, even after I bought the truck from Gid's mate, but it only would've gotten Dor and I some shabby flat, and we wouldn't be able to afford a sitter, or anything like that, so--"

"I can't believe so many of you are leaving," Sirius interrupted suddenly, almost looking surprised at himself. "Seriously though. There's going to be a handful of us left hanging around Salcombe while everyone else is off doing big things in big places. Strange, innit?"

Hestia shrugged. "You go where you feel you need to go, I think. Aidan and I were talking about moving to London before his offer came in, because we wanted to be closer to Ed, Dor and Michele. You and James and Lily have jobs here, and Remus has school... it's just what makes sense, isn't it?"

"You were planning on moving to London anyway?" Edgar asked Aidan.

"Well, the bigger the city, the more opportunities I have to elbow my way into the biz. Besides," Aidan said, shrugging a little. "Not to be a sap, but yeah, I wanted to be closer to you."

"It's nothing to be ashamed of. Children change things, even if they aren't yours," Remus said. "I'm happy staying in Salcombe. Sirius and I both want to be here to be a part of Harry's life."

"Someone needs to entertain me," Mad Eye said suddenly and turned to face the boy that'd been babbling about a band, and the people closest him. "Those your instruments?"

"Yes sir," Ben said with a smile. "I heard Ozzy himself used to let you jam with him. Do you... want to jam with us?"

"Oh God. Please sir?" Dale asked, the look on his face suggested he'd practically creamed his trousers at the mere thought. "It'd be an honour, sir."

"Stop calling me sir," Mad Eye drawled. "And get behind your instruments. Ozzy taught me to sing, and I'll take the mic. Do you know I Wanna Rock 'n Roll by Kiss?"

"Well enough, right Dale?" Benjy said quickly. "We can do it."

"Yes. Yes!" Dale said, jumping up and pracitcally tripping over his own feet to get to his keyboard. "Leroy. Dude."

"Yeah, yeah," Leroy said, grabbing his bass and setting up.

"This is hardly Christmas-y," Lily complained half-heartedly.

"Mad-Eye could probably substitute some festive lyrics, if you'd like," Figgy suggested. "Though I can't guarantee he won't rhyme holly with bollocks."

Ben counted them in and the foursome started in on playing, Mad-Eye doing the vocals with Leroy chorusing, everyone with big stupid smiles on their face. Halfway through everyone else started singing along, and it was only when the slight knock on the door had reached a banging level that Lily realized anyone was doing it at all. Getting quickly to her feet she rushed over to open, wondering who it was (since normally everyone knew to just come on in).

"For fuck's sake, take long enough," Rita said and stepped into the house.

She took off her long red jacket and hung it on the coat stand by the door, pausing for a moment as usual to give the others a moment to notice (and admire) her presence. She was wearing a deep green wrap around dress with hot red stilettos and lipstick, plus her hair was all done up with mistletoe in it. She almost looked classy, save for the raither high hemline and the rather low neckline. In truth, Rita felt the others would probably think she was lacking a little of her usual pizzazz, but she could still do bombshell even while doing sophisticated, and that was exactly what she'd been going for tonight.

"Hello, Rita," James called over the music. "Come on in!"

"Figured out it's not exactly bikini weather, have we?" Fabian called laughingly. "You left your space heaters on our lawn, I'll have you know."

"I don't need them anymore. They've served their purpose," Rita said, making her way over to Fabian and kissing the air on either side of his face in greeting. "You must be Caradoc. Pleasure. And goodness, is that Elphias Doge? You look a wreck."

Elf looked quite shocked indeed to see her, and more than a little guilty. "Yes, well, getting crushed by rocks will do that to you. What are you... they invited you to their Christmas party?"

"Of course we did," Lily said. "She's writing a book about the lot of us, isn't she? Only seemed fair, really, after she spent the better part of two weeks hunting us all down."

"Why Rita!" Sirius said. "You look almost normal in that dress!"

"She's writing a book," Elphias said slowly, giving Rita an amused look. Rita, however, was ignoring him and paying attention to Sirius. Elphias made a face at Fabian. "I'd better be in this book. I'm why she's involved in any of this, after all."

"Sirius!" Rita said with a bright smile and dropped herself onto his lap, smiling as she draped her legs over Remus as well. "Happy Christmas."

Remus looked awkwardly over at Sirius and carefully kept his hands away from Rita's bare legs. "Uh. To you too, Rita."

Sirius couldn't help but laugh. "You and Narcissa should have a contest sometime over who can stage the grandest entrance," he said, and then nudging Remus slightly said in a playful tone, "and it's nice to see that my hetero sex appeal is still intact."

"More than intact. Why, it's practically un-endurable," Rita quipped, and then laughed as she noticed Remus' frown. She swung her feet off of him, shifted into an upright position, and then squeezed herself in next to Sirius instead of on top of him. "It's the remaining Hobbled Gordons up there. Who's that singing?"

"That's Mad Eye fucking Moody, legendary tattooist," Dorcas answered. "He's apprenticing me while I take the course, and then I get to work in his shop."

"He's put ink in Sid Vicious and Ozzy Osbourne," Figgy beamed proudly, joining the conversation loudly as Mad Eye and the Gordons segued into slightly quicker version of Rick Springfield's "Jessie's Girl". "He's got no real marbles left of course, but he's lovely drunk and his hand's still steady. D'you know he and I got high with Nikki Sixx last month? That was a hell of a night, I'll tell you."

"Huh. That's impressive," Aidan said, awed.

"Motley Crue, no way," James said, leaning forward.

Sturgis' eyes widened. "What's he like?"

"Oh, you've got all the boys' attention now," Dorcas said, amused.

Rita looked over at Mad Eye contemplatively, wondering if she could bed him. That'd be quite the name to add to her considerably long list. Then her eyes slid past him and she noticed the kid banging away on the drums. "Ooh, nice arms."

"He's a raging dick, actually," Figgy said airily. "He and Mad Eye got along fabulously, of course."

"Hey Em, weren't you planning on introducing Rita to Ben there?" Edgar asked, following Rita's line of sight and trying not to laugh.

Emmeline smiled and got up. "Rita, follow me," Em instructed, heading towards Ben.

"Don't stop playing," Em said to Ben, bending down to kneel at his side.

Ben was already playing softly because they were in James and Lily's living room, but now he simplified the beat and gave his attention to Em. "What's up, gorgeous?"

"Ben, this is..." Em started, but Rita leaned over her and held out one hand, interrupting with, "Rita Skeeter. Pleasure."

Ben grinned, twirled a drumstick before holding it between his teeth for a second to shake her hand, then quickly going back to playing with both hands. "Benjamin Fenwick, at your service. But you can call me Ben."

"I said I'd introduce you, and I have. Have fun, kids," Emmeline said, and headed over to give Leroy a kiss as he played, interrupting him as he sang harmony for Sweet Child of Mine.

A cold, snowy breeze blurred into the room then as the front door opened and several cheerful voices entered the house. "Happy Christmas, everyone!" Albus Dumbledore called brightly and waved his hand at them all, causes the bells attached to the cuff of his coat to jingle merrily. "The Albus Posse has arrived!"

"Hey fuckers," Dung said, but seemed to be in rather good spirits. He looked just as rough around the edges as he'd looked last time, from the dirty, ripped to shit jeans to the cigarette tucked behind his ear. This time, however, he was smiling.

Minerva, oddly, wasn't bothered by Mundungus' swearing. The way he treated Aberforth (while not overtly obedient but still obviously respectful) had her thinking he was probably just a good kid who'd been brought up wrong, and far be it from her to lecture him for that. Besides, it was the holidays and it wasn't as though she'd never heard a foul word before. Goodness, she was a teacher after all.

"Good evening, good evening," she said from her spot next to Albus. "Oh, my, it's so good to see you all safe and happy. You have no idea how worried I was..."

"McGoogles!" Sirius exclaimed grandly. "James! Jamie, Prongsy, be still my heart, it's the love of our lives!"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Oh honestly," she said with a sigh and a smile, standing to welcome everyone in. Come in, then, come in. For everyone who doesn't know this is Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, Aberforth, is it? Yes, Aberforth Dumbledore, Ruebus Hagrid, and... er, well dear, I'm afraid I'm not sure who you are."

"I'm Mundungus, but you can call me Dung, everyone does 'cept old Abe," Mundungus replied, his thick Cockney accent seeming to drop sounds and syllables all over the place. "I've met those two. They wouldn't let me in their fuckin' little group."

Fabian smiled as Dung nodded at he and Gideon. "Hello, Dung. Pleasure to see you again."

"Fuck off," Dung replied, but again, wore a smile. "Has anyone got any booze? Tis the season for sharin', after all."

"You don't need to drink, Mung," Aberforth said, quirking an eyebrow. "You can have a little wine, if you like. And Happy Christmas, everyone. Good to see you all in form! I brought an assortment of pastries to share 'round. Mung here made them, apt little baker that he is."

"Better than fruitcake at any rate," Caradoc said.

"Caradoc!" Hagrid exclaimed cheerfully. "Didn't see you there! How are you, old boy?"

"I'm all right, Hagrid, yourself?" Caradoc asked.

"Not bad, not bad," Hagrid replied. "I got a fellow in first this year, and I think you'd like his stuff. Does real good landscapes."

"Girls, how are the little ones?" Minerva asked Lily and Alice warmly. "Goodness, Harry and Neville must be getting so big now."

Alice scribbled, 'He's so smart and handsome, just like his daddy.'

"And his mum too, now," Frank said, unable to hide a deep blush. "He loves lions something fierce, and Ed, you know, he's forever asking where Susan is."

"Is he now?" Ed asked. "Sherry'll be pleased to hear that. She thinks Nev's the cutest thing since Bambi."

"Harry's starting to talk full sentences. And he's insisting his stuffed dinosaur be called 'Sir's' and he gets to sit at the table during dinner," Lily said.

"Can we not talk about babies? Fuck," Dorcas said. "Honestly."

"It's her first time leaving the little one at home," James told Minerva. "She's a new mommy."

"Try having several hundred under your belt at once," Albus suggested, idly, glancing around at the pictures on the walls. "It is very trying to keep track of them at all times, particularly when they aren't even in the school. Though I don't suppose Mr. Black, Mr. Potter, or Mr. Lupin would know anything about that."

"It always worked out. We always made it back in one piece," James said with a smile.

"Had a couple very, very close calls, however," Remus said, and squeezed Sirius' thigh with one hand. "You'd be disappointed to hear about them, I'm sure, and I wouldn't want to worry you retroactively."

"Sirius nearly fell onto cement floor from a metal beam suspended by damn near fifty feet up by chains from the ceiling in an abandoned factory one night. Remus only barely caught him," James said dramatically.

"Oh. Oh my," Minerva said, pressing a hand to her mouth. "You silly, silly children."

"That sounds fucking awesome," Dung said brightly.

Emmeline returned then, having left Leroy to his playing--though she hoped he wouldn't be playing all night, she wanted him to get the chance to visit as well--and sat on the floor, facing them all. "Minerva seems slightly traumatized. What have you said?"

"About a time I nearly killed myself being a dumb ass," Sirius said. "I suppose to prevent further former professor traumatisation, Remus and I should refrain from recounting all the lovely places we've shagged at East Portlemouth... Oh, and Harry was conceived in the third floor janitor's closet."

"Sirius!" Lily hissed, shocked.

"What? I figure they've pieced together that there was an indecent amount of fornication going on," Sirius said. "And besides, that's just too romantic a conception not to relive."

"Don't feel bad," Edgar said, laughing. "Dor and I are pretty sure Michele came to be on top of a washing machine."

"Well now, really," Minerva said primly, giving them all reproachful looks. Then she smiled and admitted, "Oh, we all knew about the janitor's closet, dears. I certainly did. And about the storage room around the corner from the banquet hall, even before that mess with Mr. Black here in third year. I suppose you think you've learned far more about the school in your four years than we have in our decades, come now."

"Sounds like quite the boarding school experience," Elphias said with a smile. "Though I must say, the public school experience wasn't exactly lacking for me, either. I did go to school with Fabian, after all. He kept things interesting."

Fay smiled a little, but wasn't sure how reminiscing about their schoolyard adventures would go over, considering most of them were quite sexual indeed, and Caradoc might get a mite uncomfortable. "I must say, after all the stories I hear from this lot, I sort of wish I'd gone to East Portlemouth. Especially considering the professors are all so cool."

"Nothing beats public school," Gideon interjected, glancing sidelong at his wife. "Marlene and I got a round of applause from the swim team after going at it in the girls' change room."

"Yes, well I got disowned in front of the entire school for sucking off a violinist," Sirius countered.

"My, my," Albus commented. "You all must have such boring sex lives now that you're all married and void of half as many nooks and crannies to make use of. But, you see, that's the great thing about living in the school. And the real challenge is making sure that the students don't catch you."

Everyone was quiet for a moment.

"I'm not sure I want to know who or what was implied by that," Caradoc said, finally.

Minerva smoothed her hair back and raised her eyebrows at Albus.

"No!" James guffawed, eyes lighting up with a childlike glee. "Ohhh! McGoogles and Dumbles, all over the school? Really? But you're old!"

"'Old' does not equate 'incapable', Mr. Potter," Albus said.

"This is the weirdest conversation I've ever taken part in," Sirius grinned. "McGoogles, you absolute minx. However, Remus, when we have children, and you are a full fledged teacher and doing teaching related things, don't tell them of our sexual conquests. Because I think I might be in a certain amount of shock and doomed to having confusing dreams for many months to come."

"I promise," Remus said, awkward enough with this conversation that he couldn't imagine ever having a similar one no matter how many years he had to get used to the idea.

"I think it's wonderful," Lily said. "Weird to hear, yes, but I had no idea that you two were involved with one another. How long?"

"Oh, so long I've lost count," Minerva said, cheeks only slightly pink. They were all adults here. "Since before we were old, at any rate."

The doorbell rang then, but the door began to open before anyone had to get up and let them in.

"Good evening!" Narcissa called, stepping in and unwrapping a warm, thick, artfully patterned shawl from around her shoulders to reveal a couture cocktail dress in a deep purple colour and shoes that probably cost more than most of Lily and James' living room furniture put together. "How is everyone!"

"Narcissa! Lucius! You're even later than usual," Emmeline said with a smile. "And you're both looking beautifully elegant."

"We've brought champagne," Lucius said, unbuttoning his trenchcoat. Noticing the East Portlemouth teachers, he added, "Albus! Minerva! Reubus! What a pleasant surprise."

"Indeed. You remember my brother, Aberforth?" Albus asked. "It's good to see you Lucius. How's Draco?"

"Oh, he's a brilliant, beautiful enigma," Narcissa said brightly.

Hearing her own words, Rita looked up from her position next to Ben and laughed. "Narcissa! Lucius! Hello, lovelies, how are you?"

"Rita Skeeter. What a surprise," Narcissa said with a smile. "I didn't think I'd have to deal with you again for a very, very long time."

"Or until I need a follow up interview or fact checking," Rita quipped. "You look gorgeous. Those shoes are practically fuckable. Sexy. Can I have them?"

Narcissa looked at her and then laughed. "You could not fill these shoes."

"You could probably buy a house with those shoes," Lily said idly.

The evening wore on comfortably, everyone bouncing between conversations as Mad Eye finally gave in to the holiday spirit and he and the boys started playing a few Christmas tunes. Eventually they stopped to join everyone else, however, and the lot of them gradually got tipsier as Bing Crosby crooned in the background, and Lily handed out the eggnog. They relieved stories of their years in school, the early days of the Order, and everything to come now that it was all said and done; now that they were all parting ways, and moving on.

"Well there's a simple solution to that," Sirius said to the fear that they might lose touch with one another entirely beyond Christmas cards and news from relatives passed in the supermarket. "We just get together every few years, and we do this. We reconnect."

"We've all been through way too much together to just drift apart like that," Frank added.

"Hey Em, you have a camera with you?" Leroy asked suddenly.

"I always have a camera with me," Emmeline said and reached for her purse. She pulled out a small black case, zipped it open, and pulled out a small, flat digital camera. "I assume you want a group photo. And I think it's a great idea."

"But you have to be in it, Em," James said brightly. "You're always taking all the photos. This one you have to be in. Any volunteers?"

"I can take it," Remus offered with a smile as Emmeline started snapping candids of various people.

"If we're doing a group photo, Remus, you've got to be in it," Fabian said. "I want the whole Order in."

"I'm sure Mung wouldn't mind, would you son?" Aberforth asked.

"Why can't I be in the fucking picture?" Dung mumbled, but pulled his hands out of his pockets and took the camera. "All right. All of you cunts line up then."

"I can take it! If you want to be in it," Sturgis said brightly. "James is the only fellow that knows me here anyway, so it's okay."

"Get on with it then," Sirius said, rolling his eyes as Mundungus excitedly traded placed with Sturgis. With a cliche chorus of "CHEESE!" and a toasting of whatever they were holding, Sturgis pressed down and the flash of Emmeline's camera captured a moment in time not to be rivaled. On the couch sat Rita in Ben's lap, the two of them snogging like there was no tomorrow and seemingly unaware that there was even a picture being taken. Next to them was a laughing Emmeline with her arms around Leroy's neck, kissing him happily on the cheek as he beamed at her instead of the camera. Remus and Sirius were to the right of them, grinning together happily as Sirius had an arm casually looped around Remus' shoulders, their legs crossed toward one another.

On the floor in front of them sat Mad Eye with his hand forming the 'rock out' sign, Figgy next to him forming a peace sign, and Dale next to her flipping Sturgis off and grinning. Gideon and Marlene sat on the loveseat with Caradoc, Fabian seated between his legs on the floor holding on to a hand of cards. Elphias was toward the centre with a hand of his own, the two playing Go Fish. Aidan was beside Elphias with Hestia sitting happily in his lap, wearing his cowboy hat and kissing his neck.

James and Lily were in the recliner, snuggled together, Lily leaning back against James whose head was half-buried in her hair. Edgar and Dorcas were in the other chair, Ed with his feet propped up on the footstool, the both of them wrapped around one another, half-asleep and smiling tiredly. Narcissa was perched on the second footstool, posing herself haughtily as Lucius (who was more than a little tipsy) sat crosslegged on the floor laughing and looking up at his wife with his sleeves rolled up and his tie loosened.

And then there was Hagrid, Albus, Aberforth, Minerva and Mundungus off to the side closest to the dining table, having been seated around it and playing a rousing game of Clue (James having made commentary in the process, suggesting Minerva take Remus' place as Miss Scarlett).

They all looked happy, because they were all happy. Or at the very least, they were on their way.

Series this work belongs to:

← Previous Work Part 10 of The Order of Weed Next Work →

Actions

Kudos

an_chovy1, writingfunstories, Tollhouse, corway, Moondal, laricomentou, snarkandstuff, That0neIdiot, Kurasu, unoreversecard, Naya_and_ink, OrganizedDecay, thejuryandthejudge, every_aj_needs_an_angel, space_adventures, TheAdventureofTheVoid, Original_I_Am, rattiepuff, Remuslupinismyspiritanimal, Herbcitty, RavensVigil, katy425444, boredomreigns, Lux_in_tenebris, patatemoulue, Angelkst138, Faitour, Veale, caveofwonders, Kaninen225, maitimiel, wearingyou, and personinprogress1216 as well as 34 guests left kudos on this work!

Comments

Sorry, this work doesn't allow non-Archive users to comment. You can however still leave Kudos!

Archive of Our Own^beta

Actions

Work Header