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"Daddy?"
Hongjoong's eyes flutter open and he quickly sits up and looks around, frowning. Who would dare to wake him up this early? With those words? His expression softens when he spots San standing by the end of his bed, clutching Shiber in his arms. Who else would call him that other than San.
"Sannie? What's wrong?"
He asks, voice heavy with sleep, shifting a little so he can sit up properly. He looks over, noticing that Seonghwa isn't in his bed as he usually would be. Which isn't too strange but odd nonetheless. San lets out a displeased hum, swaying around with a pout on his still sleepy face. It clicks almost immediately and Hongjoong smiles at him sadly.
"What's wrong, baby?"
He asks slowly, spreading his arms so San can walk in. The younger sniffles, looking down at the older man with sad eyes as he steps closer.
"My tummy hurts..."
The vocalist mumbles and Hongjoong coos, bringing San closer. The younger bends down a little and Hongjoong plants a kiss to his forehead, rubbing his back comfortingly.
"Awh baby, come here."
He then says, petting the space next to him. San nods, sitting down, still pouting before laying next to the older man. Hongjoong wraps his arms around the younger, his hands sliding down to the boy's stomach.
He rubs circles into his clothed body, humming into his hair. San smiles, purring happily. He's still clutching Shiber close to himself but he looks way more relaxed than when he woke Hongjoong up.
The older smiles, slipping his hand under the younger's shirt and caressing his stomach gently. San shivers and giggles, his grip on Shiber loosening up.
Hongjoong thinks back to how this became so normal between them. It was odd at first. He knew about littles but he never knew any personally so it was a bit shocking.
That day was unlike any other.
Or at least to him it was.
He woke up later than usual but thankfully they had a day off that day. The leader tiredly dragged himself into the living room, smiling softly when he spotted San curled up on the couch, watching TV. He walked closer, sitting down next to him.
"Morning, Sannie."
He yawned, reaching for San's hand. Their relationship was still fresh at the time and both of them were shy but Hongjoong always found a way to get around their shyness. The younger took his hand, intertwining their fingers.
"Morning."
He answered, making sure Hongjoong is looking at him instead of anywhere else.
"Where's the rest?"
Hongjoong asked, nuzzling San's shoulder. The younger giggled, shivering a little at the action.
"They went shopping-"
He mumbled back before freezing when he noticed Hongjoong is watching the TV as well. The older frowned slightly, sitting straight up before looking over at San.
"Why are you watching that?"
Hongjoong asked, smiling with his tone a sounding confused. He was expecting many things but the vocalist watching Paw Patrol wasn't one of them. San looked at him with wide eyes, the hand that was holding Hongjoong's tightening it's grip.
His eyes then turned glassy and Hongjoong froze, his stomach turning at the sight. He quickly shook his head, letting go of San's hand and instead bringing both of his hands to his face. San sniffled, reaching for the remote before Hongjoong stopped him.
"No, it's okay, you can watch it if you want to."
He said softly, his thumbs gently caressing San's cheekbones. The younger nodded his head, bringing his hands back into his lap.
"Are you alright? Anything you wanna tell me?"
Hongjoong asked after a while of just staring into San's eyes. The younger hesitated before nodding his head and sighing.
The silence that followed made San tremble, he never liked talking about things that were happening to him, though he seemed like he enjoyed attention, he was afraid. He didn't like talking about this either, he was scared of what Hongjoong would think of him. He took one last breath before looking away, chewing on his bottom lip.
"I'm... I'm in... I'm a little."
He choked out, squeezing his eyes shut, tears pricking the corners of them. It was shocking, Hongjoong obviously had no idea about his boyfriend being a de-ager since they never got to that topic.
He knew his members the best, he knew things no one else knew and he was grateful because it showed him that they trusted him. But his boyfriend was still puzzling him at times. He knew San through and through out, sometimes he felt like he knew him better than anyone else in the world, but some of the things that he told him were still very shocking to hear.
He wrapped his arms around San's body, pulling him close. The younger immediately hugged him back, shaking in his arms as he quietly sobbed into his chest.
"Babe, it's alright, I'm here."
Hongjoong said, rubbing San's back. The younger nodded, cuddling deeper into Hongjoong's body.
"Do you, want me to do something? Anything I can help you with? Just tell me baby, I'll do it."
Hongjoong asked after a minute of comfortable silence, making San pull back with teary eyes. The younger took his time before nodding, pink dusting his cheeks.
"But don't tell anyone, please."
Hongjoong quickly nodded, pulling San back to hug him tighter. The younger sighed, visibly more relaxed.
And that was their little start.
Hongjoong would stay up even later than usual to search around the internet for tips and other help. He would even ask San himself what he liked to do and what he himself should do to make him feel alright.
It took them a little while, getting used to a new lifestyle wasn't going to happen in a day or two but they fought through it. Sometimes it felt funny. The amount of toys, dummies and coloring books that Hongjoong bought San were funny to him. He got a variety of different looks from other people, most of them probably thought he was an actual father, which made him laugh every time he went out.
But he felt almost overjoyed, an undescribable emotion on his face, when he saw San's eyes shine with excitement when he saw his toys and the other, sometimes very important, things Hongjoong bought for him.
The most challenging for him was when San got into his little space while they were practicing.
The yelling and stress was probably too much for him to handle and when Hongjoong noticed the way he was looking around at the members with shiny eyes, trembling and looking like he might break if someone even looks at him, he told everyone to go and get some coffee or something so he could have some time with San alone.
The members left without another word, leaving the two in the practice room all by themselves.
"Baby boy."
Hongjoong whispered gently, stepping closer to the vocalist. San looked at him with teary eyes, wrapping his arms around Hongjoong's neck as soon as he was close enough to do so.
"Pumpkin, what's wrong?"
Hongjoong asked carefully, shakily placing his hands on San's waist. He read that being careful was the most convenient for littles and he was willing to do anything as long as San felt good. Normally, he would talk a little more sternly but this was San. His San.
"Hurts, Daddy...."
San whispered back, his voice muffled and a sob leaving him. Hongjoong stroked the boy's hair gently, swaying from side to side and back and forth, smiling when he felt San's breathing calm down a little.
The younger stayed in the same spot for a few more minutes, his figure slowly calming down as well. San then pulled away, his cheeks dusted red and eyes still teary, pouting at Hongjoong. He reached for the leader's hand, squeezing it in his own.
"Thanks."
He whispered after a while, wiping his eyes with the back of his other hand. Hongjoong smiled softly, leaning in closer to press a quick kiss to San's forehead and then to his cheek. San then stumbled back into his embrace, nuzzling his neck with a sigh. Hongjoong was proud, that was the fastest San ever calmed down.
It felt nice. Yes, those times were about to come way more often and be way more difficult than Hongjoong thought but he was willing to go through them. He loved San, no matter what and he would do anything in the world to keep him happy. Because it was San, the San he basically breathed for.
"And I had a bad dream."
San whines quietly, interrupting Hongjoong's train of thoughts. Hongjoong coos again, pressing himself as close to San possible before throwing the blanket over both of their bodies to warm them up.
"It's okay baby, Daddy's with you now."
He had to get used to those words too but that wasn't too hard. He promised San he would do anything that he could so he could be the best caregiver out there and so far, he thinks he is doing a good job.