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Chapter Text

Resurrection

"In this Universe there might grow roses which sing" – Stephen King, IT

The fingers were first to move....Slowly, crackling and painful. Even before he opened his eyes, before he could smell or be aware of his surroundings. His gloved finger ticked on his chest ; a lazy movement. If someone would watch him, they would thing he was dead to the world and had a spasm.

It wasn't a spasm. It was the first sign that he was waking up again.

The second were the gritting of his teeth. No more fangs. Not sharp nor bloodied anymore and he already felt angry about it. His mind slowly came back from slumber.

And he remembered.

He remembered everything.

The Losers Club, those little shitty children and the fight they had underneath his house on Neibolt street. The memories made his chest rise, lips opened and the first breath of air was taken. Followed by a sharp pain radiating from his insides.

He hated breathing. Not because it hurt him when he took his first breaths, but because it was a habit he had to learn himself every fucking time again and again when he took on his human form.

He loathed his human form.

It restricted him in his movements and took most of his powers away that he had during his year of hunting. Of raising fear into the hearts of children and, sometimes, an adult or two. Feeding and terrorizing Derry. The thought of how the despair smelled on the humans he hunted, made his mouth water and he idly clicked his tongue in his mouth.

To his disappointment, the fangs truly were gone. No sharp edges in his mouth that he could use to tear through flesh and bone. His fingers now carried normal nails, no more claws that sliced through wood, concrete and steel like butter.

It was time to rise.

His eyes opened. Blue instead of orange though his frustration radiated of him like heat of a hot summer's day in Derry. He stared upwards for quite a while, missing the floating humans above him. The cave was empty now, the bodies of his victims probably flushed away through the sewers. Exposing them to the people of Derry and he chuckled dryly when he thought of the surprised faces the humans must have had when they noticed the deaths in their water.

The cold of the sewer water he was lying in, crept through his way to large suit and made him feel cold to the bone. And the smell hit his noise, making him scrunch up his features and lifted his hand to cover his face for a moment.

The hate in his body grew. The Losers made him like this, cursed him to spend the next 27 years being part human. He gritted his teeth again, grinded them against each other before he pulled himself up into a sitting position.

He stared down to his body. The clown suit draped loosely around him now. Way too large and when standing up, the suit fell of him without hesitation. The cold hit his now naked frame while his long legs stepped over the fabric. He left it in the water, ready to be taken away by the stream of the sewer water.

The muscles ached, the body he was in now wasn't used to moving around. The pain didn't bother him that much while he made his way through the sewers. Knowing his way by heart to the hole that he slowly crawled up in and in just a matter of time, he stood in the old house of Neibolt street.

He arched a brow and looked around. The rotten smell of wood hit him like a brick, mold formed in the crooks of every chamber and he realized this wouldn't do. He would need things in human form that he didn't need when he was in his true form. Or at least, the form of the clown he chose to take.

Oh, how he loved being Pennywise the Clown! The bells on his suit that faintly jingled with every step he took, the make up with the scars and the way his claws ripped through his suit.

He wasn't Pennywise now while he walked through the house. Every chamber he passed, transformed into a clean room with furniture he would need while living here. He could still use part of his powers, glamour being one of them. The old wood transformed into new and the stairs stopped creaking underneath his feet when he walked upstairs. Lights went on in the house with every step he took.

When he arrived in the bathroom, he waited patiently and saw how the room came to live before him with a smirk on his face. The bath in the corner shiny and new, the shower in the far left working again and the sink with the mirror were ready to be used.

His body cold and he shivered. He would need clothes soon, but first he walked towards the mirror and stared at his image.

A young man around the age of 28 stared back at him. The blue eyes he knew so well, the lanky yet strong frame and pale skin. Dark hair instead of the orange decorated his head and he slowly rubbed in the locks. He was human before. He sometimes took the form to roam around Derry without being noticed.

The man in the mirror blinked his eyes while his chest moved up and down to breath.

With a single hand movement, his body was covered in clothes : trousers and black shirt.

An evil smirk appeared in the corner of his mouth while he looked at his reflection. A slow nod was given to himself.

Robert Gray was back.

Chapter Text

26 years later

'Once you get into cosmical shit like this, you got to throw away the instruction manual' Stephen King, IT

(Trigger warning for language)

The hot summer's air reached his nose as soon as Bob took a step outside the old house. The stairs of the porch creaked under his weight which made his neighbour look up from her book. The eyeroll behind his sunglasses was unseen by the woman who shot up as soon as she laid eyes upon him. A curse was muttered between his lips when she crossed the lawn and made her way towards Robert.

"Bob," her voice sweet and with a slur that gave away she had been drinking. It wasn't even five o'clock in the afternoon yet.

If the rules of the Universe were different, if that stupid Turtle would've given him his powers during his 'slumber', Robert Gray would have killed her already. Her biggest fear was snakes. He could have worked with that! Oh, how wonderful it would be....

He had to wait, though. Wait for cataclysm happening in Derry, one excisting pure out of an act of violence before he could rise again and embrace his true nature. He...fucking...hated...to...wait.

He hated that Turtle too.

And the blonde, middle-aged woman who now stood before him with a drunk grin on her face that he would happily wipe off. Yet, Robert took off his sunglasses and his lips curled up into a smirk.

"Liliane," he muttered between his lips. "Sunbathing, I see."

His voice wasn't carrying a happy tune, nor did it betray his irritation he felt. It was flat, emotionless and Robert was already looking around him to see how he could get away from her. Without killing her. That was out of the question. He couldn't, even if he wanted to.

The red-dotted bikini was so fifties and vintage, that even Gray thought it a fashion crime. And he couldn't give a shit about fashion.

"Where you going, Bob?"

"It's Robert," he looked at her, eyebrow raised and his hand disappears into his pocket to find the pack of Lucky Strikes hidden there. He couldn't die and he loved smoking. So why the fuck not?

He didn't answer her question, just turned on his heels, lit up his cigarette and left the lovesick neighbour to stare at his back while he made his way into Derry.

26 years was a long time and his knuckles ached. His body didn't age, but nobody asked questions. Robert Gray was doomed to roam Derry without having any playtime. He could still sense what people feared the most, yet he couldn't do anything with it. The sweet scent of despair that lingered when a human felt the lovable sting of angst, could reach his nose and make his mouth water. Yet still, Robert would stay hungry until he could rise again.

He felt famished.

His long legs carried him through the hot streets of Derry. The asphalt radiating of the heat of the Sun and he wasn't bothered by it. Passing by the drain he took Georgie in without even looking at it. The smoke of his, now almost gone, cigarette travelled up and clouded his vision.

In the distance Robert saw the library and lowered his pace. His tongue clicked into his mouth when he saw an adult Mike running up the stairs and into the building. The only Loser who remained in Derry. The only one who remembered Pennywise and was slowly going insane while keeping track of Pennywise's past.

He missed the Loser's Club...Beverly, the red-haired girl with the fear of blood. Bill, the stuttering boy, who blamed himself for Georgie's death. Stan, afraid of the woman in the painting that hung in his father's office. Ben, the fat kid who loved Beverly. Richie, the foul-mouthed boy who was afraid of...clowns (how easy to scare Richie!) And Eddie, the hypochondriac who was scared of...everything that could carry a microbe.

His body trembled and Robert had to shake the thoughts off. His stomach grumbled angrily, his muscles contracted in his arms. The hunger was back when he thought about them. He diverted his gaze from the library towards the small pub a little further down the street.

He hated human food, it tasted dull in his mouth. Yet he needed it to keep this body alive.

When Robert entered, the music reached his ears and he took of his sunglasses while he took place in the farthest corner by the window. Because of the town's fair, the Pub was busier then other times and he cracked his fingers while he turned his back away from the people.

"Robert," the waitress said. "How are you today?"

"Fine," he looked at the girl who he couldn't seem to remember the name off. He just called her Miss Claustrophobic because she feared small spaced. "Just bring me something to eat."

Everyday he would ask the same and every time again, she would ask : "Anything you like from the day menu."

And he would sigh while leaning back into his chair. "Just bring me something. It all tastes like shit anyway."

The girl would dart away and her smile would fade because of his rudeness.

Every day was the same. Over and over again. An endless torment.

"You can use Tabasco, you know," a woman's voice echoed in his ear from behind him while a slender hand put down a small, red bottle before him. "Instead of being rude to her, spice up your food."

He saw a silhouette appearing next to him and Robert turned his head slightly. A brunette stood next to him, her hand resting on her hip while green eyes stared back at him. Features serious and when she wanted to turn and walk away, Robert Gray sniffed the air around her.

Peculiar.

Leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table, Robert chuckled darkly. That caught the attention of the young woman who stopped her actions to walk away from him.

"Never saw you before," he spoke, while turning his head so he could lock eyes with her. He sniffed again, tried to pick up a scent. Any scent that would float around her. He didn't smell anything except some perfume of flowers that he wasn't interested in.

There was no fear hanging around this woman. And she looked back at him with a stubborn gaze fixed in her green orbs.

"Arrived this morning," her short reply came and she took a step out of the way for the waitress who brought him some eggs with bacon. "Use the Tabasco," the strange woman said again, "you'll see, it will taste better."

She flashed him an awkward smile before she turned on her heels again.

"Your name," he asked, before she could fully disappear into the crowd.

The woman turned, the movement made her long hair dance around her shoulders. "Katherine Miller," she replied and then left him to his food.

His long fingers curled around the little bottle she left for him and he let the red liquid drop on his food. He liked the colour red. Reminded him of blood... When Robert took a bite, a smirk appeared around his lips.

Katherine was right, it did spice it up a little and he looked over his shoulder to see her sitting by the bar. Idly playing with her bottle of coke, deep in thought and not paying attention to him anymore.

This hot summer's day, was other then the days that passed him in those 26 years. This day, Robert Gray met Katherine Miller who, at first sight, seemed to fear nothing. And he damned well knew every human feared something.

Robert Gray wanted to find out what her fear was.

Chapter Text

Time always seemed to move slow in Derry, Maine. Especially in the warm, humid summer; the days felt endlessly stretched out, never ending. Then, finally the Sun went down and it would turn a bit cooler. Just to start the long torture of another day all over again.

Robert Gray had to sleep, just to keep his human body fit. He learned some time ago that sleep deprivation wasn't a good thing for a human. A waste of time for him, a necessity to keep sane while wandering around Derry in his 27 years of slumber. Just like food, sleep was a basic human need.

A week had passed since he saw the new girl in the pub. Already, he forgot her name, but not how she smelled. Or rather, lack of smell.... It made him tick. It made him want to dissect her and find out how she worked from the inside. No human had ever crossed his path without a sense of fear in them. Even psychopaths reeked of fear when their demise was right around the corner.

The thought of the scent of dread that filled people's hearts, made his mouth water again and Robert swiftly took a bit from his mashed potatoes that his favourite waitress (not really) put before him. The Tabasco that he had poured on them, stung his tongue and throat which made him swallow hard. Tears formed in the corner of his eyes, yet he swallowed the hot potatoes and giggled out loud. He did like this taste! It was something to almost feel your tongue burning.

"I see you like the Tabasco – tip that I gave you," her voice came from behind him.

His head turned slightly and a grin settled upon his lips.

"Ah yes," he replied, his voice low and Robert Gray let his eyes travel over this mysterious creature who stood next to him.

Her hand rested on her hip, big eyes on his face and she wobbled from one foot to another. Clearly getting uncomfortable by the way he was looking at her : like a scientist who discovered a new thing that needed investigating.

The giggle came from deep in his chest, started as a low growl yet when it left his lips, Robert Gray giggled when his eyes met hers again.

"Do I amuse you," the woman asked, her voice even.

While uncomfortable, there wasn't any fear...just yet.

"You do," he mused, his tone almost sang like his blood did while he was hunting. "I can't quite remember seeing you around Derry before....What was your name again?"

He dropped his fork, wiped his mouth clean and fully turned on his chair to face her.

"Katherine," her reply came and she wiped her long hair to the back. "And I'm just passing through."

Robert raised a brow and shook his head slowly.

"Nobody just passes through Derry, dear," and he saw that struck a nerve because Katherine turned her gaze towards the window.

"You know, funeral, paperwork that comes with it, a house that needs to be sold," she said, her voice trailed off, just like her thoughts seemed to wander through the window she was looking at. "That kind of shit."

The last four words made Gray laugh out loud. He didn't expect her to curse. She seemed a polite, frail woman and the words seemed strange coming from her lips. And when Katherine looked at him, first with those big and green eyes of hers, she looked as if she would walk away from him. After a few seconds though, a faint smile broke her serious features and looked younger than she probably was.

A hint of recognition flashed through him, but Gray couldn't place it instead he did something new. Something he had never done before; he stood up and, with a grand gesture and a small bow of his head, pulled the second chair that stood by his table back.

He offered her a seat.

The woman had sparked his curiosity and, unwillingly, he had hoped to see her again during the last week.

"Please, dear," he smiled, baring his white teeth. "Least I could do is offer you something to drink after the Tabasco hint. At least, now I have some taste from my food."

Katherine seemed to doubt, glanced over her shoulder and back to him. As if she was contemplating if he was to be trusted.

He wasn't.

"One coffee," she replied and slid into the seat he had offered.

When her shoulder brushed his, the scent of roses entered his nose and Robert pulled up his nose slightly. Not that he disliked the smell of those flowers, it was just...too innocent. He hated innocence.

A few hours later, Katherine had shed off her insecurities about him and they were still talking, and laughing loudly, in the Pub about everything and nothing. The Sun was going under, and when the first rain of this long summer finally started to fall and cooled down the streets outside, the few people inside cheered.

Katherine cheered too, laughed and even clapped his shoulder while smiling wide at him. Gray faked a grin, not at all entertained of the sudden rainfall. It just meant that summer was close to over and that Fall was about to start. And with that, his 26 years of roaming around as Robert Gray came to an end because the Losers Club defeated him in October. It meant he would officially be Gray for 27 years then. And he was sick of it.

"Were you born here," he suddenly asked Katherine and turned to face her again.

The woman sipped from her red wine that she ordered not too long ago and nodded.

"Yes," she said, the smile around her lips faded and for a moment, Robert wanted to see it again. "I moved when I was around four, if I remember correctly."

"Why?"

She wobbled on her chair, her fingers nervously playing with the glass before she locked eyes with him. "I had a sister. She died. My parents didn't want to be in Derry no more. So, we moved."

She stated it so a matter of factly , that Gray leaned back in his chair. Blue eyes scanned her again.

"Died?"

"Murdered."

"And, tell me, dear," he leaned towards her, "when was this?"

"Almost 27 years ago," she looked away towards the heavy rain outside, her gaze clouded again.

Robert bared his white teeth again, a menacing grin formed around his lips and he licked them. Now, murder was something that did interest him. More likely; he was probably the one who killed the sister.

"How sad," he sung.

When one of the other people left the Pub, the door opened, and Katherine's hair flew up a bit. Revealing her bare neck and the wind that hit his nose brought forth the scent of roses again.

"I don't remember her," she spoke, downed her wine in two gulps and stood up. "I've got to go."

"Okay," he said and let her walk passed him.

His gaze followed how she walked outside, went to the left and crossed the street before disappearing out of view. Not even bothered by the rain

Chapter Text

He didn't plan it, or maybe he did, but the coming three weeks, Robert met up with Katherine on an almost daily basis. Apparently, the girl took a part-time job in the Pub and stood in the kitchen cooking things most of the time. They made some kind of unspoken agreement; he would come in around five PM, order something to eat and she would join him at the table with her own food because her shift was finished.

And damn, she spiced up his food like Robert hadn't eaten it before. He even did a weird happy dance one Tuesday when Katherine had made him some Pasta. It was so good; he couldn't help drooling over the dish. She had laughed out loud while he danced around, not caring about the looks the others were giving the pair that always sat by the window on the far right. Though, it must have been a rare sight; a man they didn't seem to know but was always there and a young woman who only showed up recently.

They both didn't care. Not about the glares they got, not about what others thought. Especially Robert couldn't give a flying rat's ass about anything. He knew the people of Derry couldn't remember him. He made sure of it. They'll soon forget about Robert Gray entirely when his slumber was over. Memories of adults were a great thing to play around with. It was like turning off a switch and they forgot everything that Robert wanted.

And that's why there were hardly investigations during his hunting time. Almost no missing children cases were followed up, because the authorities in Derry, Maine forgot about them eventually.

Easy Peasy for Robert! If he got tired of Katherine, he would just snap his long fingers and she'd forget about him.

Yet, he didn't get tired of her company. There was something mesmerizing about the young woman. Maybe the way she laughed at his gruesome jokes he sometimes told, or the fact that she smelled of those stupid roses, or maybe it was just because she turned out to be a great cook. That's what probably made him propose to go to the yearly fair at the end of Summer. There would be a fun fair, a circus (yippy!) en live music.

Her cheeks had coloured a slight crimson red when he proposed it and Katherine had murmured a 'yes' to his invitation. Robert had clicked his tongue happily and felt her emotions going through him for the first time since they met. She wasn't afraid, but she had a lot of other emotions that ran through her....and because he tuned in on her, they went through him.

It was a mixed bag, and, except for fear, Robert Gray didn't know most of the emotions that humans could feel. He gave up trying to place them after a while; he didn't understand them anyway.

Nonetheless, Robert Gray started to get used to her hanging around and he himself found that he looked forward to 5 PM every day. After a few weeks, he still didn't know what it was about her that made her fearless. And he stopped trying to find out when they were talking in the Pub. The thought of wanting to investigate this creature before him disappeared to the back of his mind when she sat in front of him.

He got to know the girl who sat in front of him. Katherine always ordered a coffee or two and only then switched to red wine. Never more than one and a sparkling water to end the night. She told him her aunt had died, her only living relative, and that she had been a bitter bitch all her life. Something that made Robert chuckle. Always when Katherine Miller cursed, he could feel his lips widen into a smile.

Sometimes, it seemed she zoned out completely. Then she just sat silently next to him and Robert could stare at her without her noticing. Her green eyes seemed so far away, and he always wondered where she was in those moments. Features blank as an unpainted canvas, hands on her lap while her food went cold in front of her.

Those were the days that she would eventually stand up, excused herself and went home. Robert never said anything about it, nor did he care if he was honest. It was other days that were fun to him, that he enjoyed her company. It made the days go by faster and because of her, he hardly noticed that the Summer holiday for the children slowly came to an end.

As only living relative, Katherine had been tasked with cleaning up the house to eventually put it on sale. The aunt had been a hermit most of her life and her house was stuffed with books, papers and little statues of kittens. Which made the work last longer than she originally anticipated.

He had shivered when Katherine had told him about how many tiny statues there were of those furry rascals and she had offered him a sincere smile while wiping her hair away from her eyes.

"I know," she had said, voice soft and gentle, like it rang in his ears and at that moment, Robert Gray suddenly stood up from his chair.

He looked down at her while his insides started to hurt. He seemed to burn from the inside. His long fingers curled into a fist and he bit his lip until it bled. His breathing became erratic when Katherine followed his movement and looked up at him in worry. When she reached out to him, a growl escaped his throat and she quickly took a step back. No fear, just out of caution.

"Don't touch me," he snarled at her.

His sudden change in behaviour threw her off guard and for a moment Robert Gray, no Pennywise, wanted to grab her by the throat and throw her out on the streets. To hurt her. Kill her. Eat her.

He could imagine how the scent of roses would be replaced by the metallic smell of blood. And he licked his lips while Robert's blue eyes kept staring at her. Without moving. Without breathing.

"Robert," her voice seemed to be coming from far away, but when she spoke his name again, Gray shook his head wildly. As if he could chase away the thoughts that suddenly seemed to consume him.

"Don't ever touch me again," he spat at her, his hand grabbed his black coat from the chair, and he brushed passed her.

He left the Pub in a hurry, walked down the main street of Derry to make his way to the Neibolt house where he lived. As far away from her as possible. He couldn't kill while he was in his slumber, but he damned well wanted to kill Katherine in that moment.

Robert threw the door of his house open, went to the kitchen and stared around.

He felt locked in a cage. And that cage was Derry. And his need for violence grew inside him. Like a weed.

When Robert turned to face his cupboards, he bared his teeth in a wide smirk. The reflection in the glass wasn't the young man he got used to seeing. No. IT stared back at him. With hungry, honey coloured eyes instead of his normal blue ones. Teeth as fangs in his mouth and the red scars that ran on his white skin from his eyes to the corner of his lips.

He giggled. A creepy, uncomfortable sound in the silence of the house. He brought his hand to his lips, as if he didn't want to disturb the lingering stillness. The reflection showed a white – gloved hand.

"Oh oh," he murmured happily, "waiting's almost over."

Chapter Text

'Adults are the real monsters,' Stephen King, IT

Katherine's POV

A hiss escaped her lips when she grabbed the hot pan without thinking. The soaring heat burned her skin on her hand, making her drop it on the ground. The scrambled eggs all over the kitchen floor, but Katherine ignored them while she ran to the sink.

The cold water over the burn soothed it for a few minutes until the sharp sting of the open wound made her close her eyes. She bit her lip, tried not to let the tears, that were pricking in the corner of her eyes, escape.

'"Fuck, fuck," she cursed, getting the attention of the chef of the Pub. "Don't just stand there, idiot," she snarled, "get some Vaseline."

"We don't have any. Don't call me an idiot when you're the one stupid enough to grab a hot pan with your bare hands. And clean up the mess you made, will you?!"

The big man mumbled something about her being a cunt, but Katherine wasn't listening anymore. She was used to being called stupid all her life and it simply didn't hurt her anymore. She took one of the towels that were just washed to put on the burn, in the meantime searching for something that could ease the pain.

"Go home," the voice came from behind her and Katherine shook her head without looking at Amy. The waitress was a sweet, little thing; blonde, small of frame and freckles decorated her beautiful and flawless face. Her personality was how she looked; sparkly, sweet and caring. Most of the time she annoyed Katherine with her 'always-miss-sunshine' - mood. Yet, Katherine Miller couldn't find the courage to tell her to bugger off.

"I can't. Joe has a vacation day and the people need their food," she murmured, throwing open cabinets without any luck to find something she could use.

By now, she was sure she could feel her heartbeat bouncing up and down through the wound. The nagging pain didn't subdue, no, it became harder and harder for her to stop spilling tears from the pain.

"I'll take your shift," Amy soothed and this time, Katherine turned to face the young woman.

Amy reached out to her left, grabbed something from one of the lower cabinets and handed her the Vaseline. "It isn't going to help; you'll need to go to the hospital. It's a third-degree burn."

Katherine raised a brow while she took the tiny pot and started smearing it on the wound. "What? Are you a nurse or something?"

"I am," the reply came, and Katherine opened her mouth to say something. Thought the better of it and glanced at the burn on her hand. The skin was gone. A red, angry wound stared back at her and she knew Amy was right.

Yet, she didn't want to leave the Pub. Home here in Derry wasn't home. It was an old house that needed cleaning up and to be sold. A task that seemed never ending. It was depressing to live and sleep in a house that wasn't yours and would never will be. That, and this fucking city wasn't helping her mood either. It always seemed as if there hung something in the air that caused the people to go to bed early and dim their lights. Whatever it was, Katherine just wanted to get back to Portland when she got the chance.

That, and maybe Robert would come today. The last time he left in a hurry, suddenly angry at her, or the world, who knew. And Katherine hadn't seen him again. She didn't have a phone number, an address or anything of him. It had been a week since he had left her sitting here.

It wasn't that she needed him. It was that she became to see him as the only friend here in this dusty old city. He was weird, no doubt about that. His humour was dark, he sometimes stared at her when he thought Katherine wasn't aware. But he was the only one who was friendly enough to a stranger and invited her at his table.

Katherine had the feeling she had lost her only friend here in Derry, Maine. And this city was lonesome without anyone to talk to. When asking around about him, nobody she talked too seemed to know something about him. Only that he was from Derry and that he was here for as long as they all could remember.

"Katherine, visitor," someone called out to her and she couldn't help the small increase of her heartbeat.

When she walked out the kitchen, she smiled when noticing Mike Hanlon, the librarian of Derry. Not who she hoped it would be, but Katherine was happy for the diversion. The man answered her smile, but he looked even older when he did that. Mike Hanlon was a friendly, but nervous man. And the lines on his face showed how tired he was. She wondered how a Liberian could have so much worries he wasn't sleeping well. A divorce maybe?

Katherine went to the library earlier this week because of the number of old books that was in the house. She didn't want to sell them, too much work, and came up with the idea that the library might be a good place for them. That's when she met Mike who was more than happy to hear about some free books. His eyes lit up when she mentioned the history books about Derry.

And now he was here, and Katherine had no idea why. The man who stood before her must have seen her confusion while she held her wounded hand into the other.

"We had agreed to meet up here to go to your house today," he helped and Katherine mentally slapped herself.

She completely forgot today he would go and check out the books in the house.

"What happened," Mike pointed at her hand and she waved his worries away.

"Stupid," she mumbled slowly, "look, Mike, I completely forgot about this. And I need to go to the hospital for this," raising her hand to show him. "So maybe, we can ...."

"Katherine," another voice called her name. A deep voice with a sharp undertone. One she was waiting to hear for the last week. Katherine turned her face slightly and was met with the most beautiful blue eyes she had ever seen. It was as if she hadn't noticed his blue gaze until now.

'How silly,' she thought when her breath got caught in her throat.

Robert Gray stood before her; his black jeans and coat shielding him from the chill that the end of Summer seemed to bring.

"Robert," Katherine muttered, but he wasn't looking at her anymore.

He glared at Mike instead, and for just a second, Katherine had the feeling he wanted to punch the librarian in the face. There was a fire in his eyes that unsettled her. Until, a wide smile broke out and graced Robert's features.

"Mike," he mused and offered his hand. "The Librarian, right?"

Mike nodded slowly and doubted to take the offered hand. "And you are?"

"Robert," Gray stated, pulling his coat a bit straighter and Katherine her gaze flickered between the two men.

Mike's stare towards Robert didn't go by without her noticing it, but Katherine her eyes were now glued on Gray.

"Where have you been?" She asked.

Robert finally looked at her again and his smile disappeared when he noticed the open wound on her hand.

"What happened?"

Katherine shook her head. "I was clumsy, not a big deal it's just..."

"Let's take care of that first," Robert stated and looked at Mike again. "Pleasure to meet you, Mister Hanlon. We'll meet again, I'm sure."

'Mike didn't mention his last name,' the thought shot through her mind.

"Yeah," the other mumbled, still staring at Gray while Robert pulled Katherine with him.

When the fresh air hit her in the face, Katherine pulled her hand out of his which made Robert turn to face her.

"Last time I saw you, you were...," she couldn't finish her sentence while he glared at her.

"Drunk," he declared simply and started walking again. "We need to take care of your hand."

"I'll go to the hospital, it's no big...,"

"I'll do it. Come."

He wouldn't listen, just kept walking and Katherine took a deep breath in...and started walking.

"Where are we going?"

"My house," he simply said.

Chapter Text

Neibolt Street was only three blocks away from the Pub, but when Robert glanced at Katherine, he saw the obvious pain written on her face. Pain normally amused him...Hell, Pain made him fucking happy whenever he saw or conflicted it on others. He didn't like to see it on her face for some reason.

A hiss escaped his lips when a burning sensation started in his stomach again, made its way down his belly and when Katherine looked at him, he bit the insides of his cheeks and was able to offer her a reassuring smile. Or at least, he hoped it came off as reassuring.

The last few days, Robert hadn't left his house. After he saw his reflection as Pennywise, he had waited to see it again. To feel the energetic outburst of violence somewhere in Derry that would bring him out of his slumber. Whatever made Pennywise come out that day, was conjured up by an act of violence somewhere close by. He had felt the echo of that, but it hadn't been strong enough to fully wake his abilities.

So, he was still Robert Gray.

Something had shifted, though. He couldn't understand what or how, or why. When he woke up the day after IT had stared back at him, it was still early because the sun was barely rising, Robert had listened to his heart beating in his chest. He never once did this before, never asked himself how his heart sounded, how it worked, how it felt... Yet, there he was.... His hand on his chest, staring at the wooden ceiling above him, feeling how his heart went; Thud Thud ThudThud.

He might have done that for a few minutes, maybe a few hours, Robert had no idea. That same morning, when he finally got out of bed, and went into town to swiftly pick up some groceries, he had a taste of coffee. Nothing new. He drank coffee daily, just as he smoked. When that first sip of the day went over his tongue, he had shivered involuntarily. It tasted different. The coffee didn't taste as nothing anymore; instead the bitterness made Robert grin and enjoy the taste.

Small things, small changes. Nothing he worried about. Too much.

When they arrived in his front garden, he felt Katherine stood still behind him instead of following him to the door. He glanced back, features serious while he watched how she took in the exterior of the house. Robert knew what she saw; a white and red painted wooden house, three stairs that led up to a red front door, a two-persons old metal swing on the porch that he never used.

"What," he asked, half turning to face her when Katherine offered him one of the warmest smiles he ever gotten. And he didn't get lots of smiles. He hated smiles. Just not the smile she just gave him. It made Robert shift uncomfortable from one foot to another.

"I just saw you as a typical modern apartment kind of guy," she replied, voice light and it seemed she completely forgot about the wound on her hand.

"How so," his eyes shifted to his neighbour, who stood on her porch, watching Katherine with big eyes. He never got any visitors. Let alone he invited one, so it must've gotten his neighbours attention.

Robert ignored the older woman and turned to face Katherine again, just to take a big step away from her. While he was looking at the house next door, she apparently made his way towards him and stood before him. Too close.

His movement didn't go by unnoticed by her because she raised a brow, but respectfully took a small step away from him; creating some distance between the two and her smile became apologetic. Robert shook his head slowly and with a wave of his hand offered her to follow him inside the house.

"I don't know," she finally replied while she followed him inside the small, wooden yet charming house. "It's just what I thought. I love this, it's beautiful."

Her green orbs went over the old stairs while Katherine followed him through the living room to the kitchen area. Robert made sure the glamour was still strong; weaving his magic through the house once more.

"Just like I had no idea you liked roses," this remark made him turn on his heel to face her. No idea what she was talking about until he noticed the white roses on his kitchen table. Did he do this?

He stared at the flowers, chaos in his mind and a low growl threatened to escape his throat. Robert couldn't remember the white roses, but when he saw Katherine walking towards them, and her fingers caressed the white petals, he nodded uncertain. A half-smile appeared on his lips when the sunlight fell on her chocolate brown hair through the little window.

"Yes, I like the scent of them," walking towards her, hands in the pockets of his black trousers.

"They remind me of you," he spoke up, and clenched his lips shut again.

What the fuck was he saying?!

There was that smile of hers again, and Robert had no idea if it enraged him or if he liked it. He was conflicted and coughed to get the knot out of his throat that had formed there. Maybe he should just grab her by the throat and rip her head off. That would end everything he felt because Robert Gray was certain that Katherine Miller was the one to blame for those little differences.

Instead, he pulled back a chair.

"Sit, I'll get the bandages and alcohol."

"Alcohol?"

"Not for the wound, for youuu," he sang the last word while he went to one of the cabinets to pull out everything, he needed for her hand.

Glamour was weaved again while Katherine sat down. Robert didn't really have anything that could take care of the burn on her hand, but in less than a second he held a bottle and some cotton in his hands. A bottle of tequila, which was real, was sat on the table when he swiftly pulled one his chairs to go sit before her.

'Too Close," Pennywise's voice whispered in his head. Followed by a maniac sounded laughter. 'We should kill her, eat her...Make her fear ussss.' And Robert's head filled with the sound of small bells.

Robert shook his head, wondered when he suddenly seemed to have two voices in his head. One of Robert, one of Pennywise the Clown. He ignored it, put the Clown to the back of his mind when he took Katherine's hand in his. Skin warm, almost burning him.

The wound was red, swollen and the flesh around it smelled. He turned her hand in his a few times, to make sure he looked at it from every side. Robert felt her gaze resting on him but didn't look up.

"I was being stupid in the kitchen," she spoke, and Robert looked up at her. He shrugged his shoulders and opened the bottle of tequila. He offered her a glass; which Katherine took hesitantly.

"It won't bite," his voice short when he saw her doubt.

Katherine slowly shook her head, a nervous smile on her lips. "No, no, that's not it. I ...," she took a deep breath in, "I'm on anxiety pills. I can't drink liquor while taking them."

Robert froze in his place, the cotton in his hands and watched her. That was it. That was why she didn't feel fear. She couldn't because those pills made her numb. The grin that formed on his features was unseen by her because she had her gaze towards her feet. He could feel her shame and instead of taking advantage, one of his long fingers came to rest under her chin. Robert made Katherine look at him.

"I have lemonade too," he offered her a sincere smile.

Katherine took a breath of relief, probably because he didn't ask questions about it. She nodded with red coloured cheeks when his finger left her chin.

"Thank you, that would be great."

Chapter Text

'Do you want a balloon?' - Stephen King, IT

Katherine's POV
The small, wooden house Robert lived in was cosy and charming. The first thing she noticed when entering, was the sweet scent of something sugary. Something Katherine couldn't quite place and was still thinking about when his long, gracious fingers held her hand in his. She wasn't looking at was he was doing, only that the burn on her hand slowly ebbed away. With that the pain slowly subdued until it was just a hint of a sting anymore.

"Finished," he said and sounded out of breath.

Her gaze caught his and Katherine noticed the little sweat drops on his forehead. Her first instinct was to reach out to him, but she thought the better of it because Robert seemed to loath physical contact.

"Why did you come back?"

Her voice was soft, barely a whisper but Robert heard her more than clear in the silence of the house. The question that came out of her mouth wasn't the one she had been meaning to ask. Katherine had intended to ask if he was feeling fine. Maybe he had a fever that caused him to sweat like this.

A grin spread on his lips and Katherine leaned a bit away from him when he came closer with his face. Sometimes, just when the light hit his face just in an angle, Robert's grins seemed creepy to her.

"Are you afraid of something?"

She arched a brow and slowly shook her head.

"No...," voice uncertain and confused.

"Good!" Robert practically jumped up from his chair, swivelled around himself before he stretched out his hand to her. It was like an awkward little dance and Katherine couldn't help the laugh that escaped her lips. "I promised to take you to the fair, didn't I?"

Her lips opened and closed again when, with one arm behind his back and the other still stretched out towards her, made a bow while his blue gaze was glued on hers. A wink was given to her.

"And there's a spooky house that I just adore," he added.

Katherine caught herself grinning the whole time and finally took his hand. His skin was cold against hers, but it didn't bother her at all.

"So, you came back to take me to the fair?" Her question lingered in the air while Robert frowned, yet his smile never left his face.

"Yes, dear," and he came a bit closer to her face, "Robert Gray always keeps his promises. I'll even get you a balloon! One that floatsssss! I love those!"

She could feel his breath on her face when he spoke, so close he was to her and Katherine closed her eyes for a moment. He smelled like the house...sweet, sugary... honey perhaps? She couldn't lay her finger on it.

Opening her eyes again, she saw the twinkle in his eyes; playful, expecting an answer. She nodded slowly.

"Okay, take me to the fair. Make me see another side of Derry that I haven't seen before," her heartbeat in her chest like a monster held in a cage because he was still close to her.

Her answer liked him, because Robert created some distance between them again by taking his knee-long coat from the chair.

"Let's go, you'll need a coat. It'll get chilly later tonight," he said, voice suddenly serious and he put his collar a bit straighter. "We'll pass by your house on the way to the fair. It's close by the library."

That made her hold her pace and grab him by the shoulder. Robert glanced at her with a confusing frown between his brows. Katherine shook her head slowly.

"How do you know where I stay? I never told you that," she said, and Katherine thought about Mike. "And how did you know Mike's last name?"

Her voice didn't sound suspicious, just curious and Robert his smile that came around his lips, reassured her. Katherine didn't see it coming, but his hands were both on her face in the next second. Cold, big hands cradled her face and she locked eyes with him. The smile around his lips was gone and his eyes flickered over her face.

Katherine held completely still inside his hold. It was like Robert was taking in her features, investigating her and she felt her heartbeat speed up again. She hadn't noticed she held her breath until his eyes finally found hers. Her breath escaped in small, soundless gasps her lips.

He let go of her and there was that grin again. Yet, it was more of a smile this time. A warm and sincere smile while he kept her gaze.

"Derry has little secrets for me," he murmured. "I've been here since...forever. I know everything of the people in Derry. I know every crook of this town, every dark secret..." He wiped away a strand of hair out of her face with one finger. A fast act and Katherine already missed his hands on her face. "Also, Mike's the town librarian. Everyone knows him. As for your address, my dear, I asked your co-worker where you lived because I went to the Pub yesterday, but you weren't there."

Suddenly, she felt silly, practically feeling her cheeks heat up and she looked away from him. "Right, I forgot you lived here since you ... were born," she stuttered and followed Robert outside.

Katherine glanced to her right where a blond, elderly woman was looking at her.

"Your neighbour," she started, but Robert waved her question away.

"Nothing to be worried about. Weird old hag," he replied before he put his collar even more up.

It was only then that Katherine realised it was slowly getting dark already and the chilly wind touched her face. She walked next to him towards the house she stayed in. All the way there, they talked, laughed and she felt no pain from her hand. He even touched the small of her back when a toddler with A tricycle suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

She forgot she didn't like Derry, forgot his outburst from a week ago in the Pub, forgot everything for as long as he was next to her. As if her mind blocked everything else out when Robert Gray walked next to her and told her about Derry; how the big, plastic woodchopper statue came to be and that the townsfolk were outraged when that ugly thing decorated their square. He told her about the big fire at the Blackspot, a tale that send Katherine a chill up her spine.

Robert Gray even told her about the Barrens and that the sewer system was so old, that every time it rained in Derry (which was quite a lot) the town was flooded. The Barrens that weren't barren, Katherine noticed when she looked down from Main Street towards the fields beneath.

She was enchanted by the way Robert talked. His deep voice made her feel like in a trance and Katherine felt relieved he knew the way to her house because she just followed his lead.

The pair hadn't noticed the pair of eyes that watched them from a distance.

Mike, one of the seven kids now grown up who was part of the Loser's Club 27 years ago, had followed Robert out of the Pub towards the house on Neibolt Street. And although Robert had made sure that Mike also forgot about Neibolt Street, Mike Hanlon had felt something quite off about the young man he met in the Pub. He couldn't say what yet...only that it felt they had met before.

Chapter Text

The house they entered carried the scent of moist and mould. Not healthy for a human to live in these kinds of conditions. Even Robert knew that as soon as they entered Katherine's house, which was dark before she switched on a light. It was only the lightbulb, no chandelier or no decoration.

The living room was filled with packed boxes with names written on the sides of what was in it. Robert looked around, didn't think any of it and held still when Katherine turned to face him.

"Sorry about the mess," she apologized, "the sofa is clean though. Take a seat, I'm right back."

Before she fully disappeared, Katherine turned to face him again.

"Thank you," she mumbled quickly, "for my hand and walking me here."

He shrugged it off with a wave of his hand and saw her disappear upstairs. The healing process had made him suffer. He never used any kind of healing powers before. He didn't exist to heal. He was here on Earth to destroy, to devour, ... Yet, the angry wound and the pain it inflicted on her...Robert couldn't stand it, so he conjured up powers beyond his knowledge.

But most of all, he offered to walk her to her home to find those pills. If he got rid of them, Katherine might show something of what she feared. A grin settled around his lips when he made his way to the small bathroom on his left. He knew all the houses in Derry. Even the new ones. An older house like Katherine stayed in, practically held no secrets for him. He can even remember the house that stood before this one, and the one before.

When he pulled the cord to make the light go on, Robert his grin only widened when noticing the cabinet above the sink. He listened first; Katherine's footsteps were heard above his head and he waited to make sure she wasn't coming down again before he pulled it open. His eyes flickered over the different bottles and tubes. Hand cream, facial wipes and some random paracetamol.

He was closing the cabinet again, until he caught sight of a small, brown glass bottle tucked away on the far left. Half hidden behind a pot of Vicks and his eyes sparkled when he quickly grabbed it. The pills were small and pinkish of colour. Robert didn't doubt when he threw them down the drain until the bottle was empty. The sugar-coated pills made a clinging sound which echoed through the small bathroom.

With a flick of his hand, the bottle was filled again. Not with her anxiety pills, just sugar coloured pills that looked like them. He couldn't help the deep laugh that escaped his throat; it came from somewhere deep inside him and sounded more animal – like. A hyena.

When Robert closed the cabinet, he slowly looked up and saw his blue eyes turn a honey amberlike colour. Slowly, yet surely, two faint red scars showed up. The lines ran from his eyes to the corners of his lips.

'Can you feeeeel it?'

He didn't move his mouth; the voice came from inside him and Robert nodded absently. He did feel it in the air. He could fucking smell it. It reminded him of the small of a heavy storm raging above Derry during summer. It was the scent of violence waiting to happen. His fingers rested on the white sink and he pinched the porcelain so hard, his nails broke, and blood started to flow in small streams towards the sinkhole.

"Robert?"

That sweet voice made him pull his hands from the sink and Robert stretched his neck from left to right. The colour of his eyes back to a normal blue and his nails were back. There wasn't any blood in the sink, and he turned on his heels.

"Sorry, I needed to use the bathroom," he smiled, when she almost bumped up to him when he appeared.

He couldn't help to look closely at her. Katherine had changed into a simple, white dress. It was knee-length and had a lace border where the skirt ended. It was centred, which made Robert notice her curves for the first time since they met. The little V-neck was low, but not too low to be indecent. It had long sleeves, but Katherine had her black leather jacket in her right hand.

When he caught her gaze, she was blushing and looking down to her feet. The burn inside his stomach was back, but this time it wasn't painful. And for a moment, Robert Gray felt regret that he threw away her pill.

"You look beautiful," he said, and nodded happily when noticing the sneakers. "Good choice! Heels would get you nowhere! We'll do a lot of walking, dancing and eating!"

Katherine nodded and Robert laid his hand on his chest when he felt his heart rattle.

"Let's go," she nodded to the door while he laid his hand on the small of her back again.

They walked together, side by side. The first few minutes in a comfortable silence and Robert felt her elbow sometimes brush his arm. They saw the lights of the fair first; lighting up de now dark sky above Derry. After that, the music reached their ears and Robert smelled the air.

"Popcorn!"

He glanced at Katherine who had shouted the word loudly. Arching a brow, Robert looked at her confused.

"I love popcorn," he started, but she turned to him with big, green eyes.

"No, no," she shook her head and then nodded. Confusing him even more. "I mean yes," she continued, "Popcorn is my favourite, but I mean, your house! It smelled like popcorn. I couldn't come up with it until now!"

She looked sincerely happy and Robert couldn't hold back the laugh. "Popcorn is my favourite too," he whispered, pulling her a bit closer to him and whispered in her ear; "I sometimes make it at home. That's why you smelled it."

It was a lie. Like the white roses appearing on his table, Gray had no idea why the hell his house smelled like popcorn to her. It was something else Katherine Miller seemed to love, just like those damned, ugly roses. Beautiful roses.

"Let's see how the line at the spooky house is," he finally said, let go of her and motioned to follow him. "But first," he grinned when he saw a clown a little bit further. Let's get you a floating balloon. A red one would suit you well."

Chapter Text

The fair was lit up with white coloured lightbulbs which made it almost fairylike. It was crowded already ; teenagers, toddlers with their parents, young couples,... They ran from the circus to the mirror palace and back again. Laughter filled the air and for once, it seemed that Derry was brighter then ever before.

Robert normally loathed it yet he couldn't help the smile that spread on his face when he saw Katherine stood still and watched the scene in be-wonderment. Her green eyes sparkled and they mirrored the thousands of lights. He wasn't aware he was taking in her features, as if he didn't want to forget how she looked like when he'd be gone.

He was put out of his reverie when some screaming children ran passed them and Katherine turned her head to face him. Robert only vaguely picked up on the playing children because he kept his gaze on Katherine's instead.

His smile made place for a smirk and he tapped his feet playfully together.

"My dear," he said, "what do you want to do first?"

"You said there's a great haunted house," she spoke, the joy apparent in her voice and laugh rang through the air when Robert circled his arm in hers.

He pulled her to the far left of the fair. A computer generated voice came from the front of the haunted house. The bad recorded laughter made the exterior of the house even creepier and Robert felt Katherine held her pace.

The house was just that : an old house. Every year the Carnival was build around it because is was one of the town's monuments. Robert never understood why it wasn't tore down. The house was small, build out of bricks and smelled of rotten potatoes in summer. No one important ever lived there and he could tell ; that shit house wasn't haunted at all.

During the fair, the house was dressed up inside with creepy stuff that made him laugh. But he fed on the fear of the people entering it. Even when he still was in his slumber, Robert was sure he'd feel the dread of some of these humans around them.

He glanced at Katherine who looked at the house with an arched brow.

"You aren't scared, are you dear?"

Robert didn't really expected an answer. He already knew it ; she wasn't scared at all. He'd be able to sense or smell it on her. There was excitement radiating of her with a hint of an emotion he couldn't quite bring home. Her heartbeat went faster then normal and a soft, crimson colour decorated her cheeks whenever she turned her eyes away from him.

"I'm not," she said and determined started to walk towards the house to stand in line.

Robert chuckled. He liked her.

Then he choked on his own thoughts and spit on the ground. As if he could spit the thoughts out that pained him. He had to take a deep breath, stretched his knuckles and followed to stand next to her in line.

The people around them were filled with adrenaline that shot high whenever the fake laughter was heard. Here, there weren't any lights to make the atmosphere light and playful. Something pushed down on his shoulders, an pressure of unease that he couldn't quite shake that had nothing to do with the girl who stood next to him. It wasn't the fact that her shoulder brushed against his upper arm ; no, he quite liked that. It had to be something else that made Robert look around him.

When he finally glanced over his shoulder, Robert locked eyes with Mike Hanlon who stood at the tree-line, watching the pair from afar. They stared at each other for some time before Robert flashed one of his wide grins, baring his teeth in the process. Sharp edges , fang-like. He could feel his eyes glow and when a young girl ran passed him with a red balloon in her hands, Pennywise the Clown thundered loudly in his head to get out.

"Robert?"

A soft touch, fingers circled his upper arm gently and made him tear away his eyes from a shocked Mike Hanlon in the distance.

When Robert locked eyes with Katherine again, his teeth were normal and his gaze a soft blue. Confused, he shook his head slowly with his eyes closed.

"What's wrong?"

Tender fingertips came to rest on the side of his face and he took a deep breath in through his nose when Katherine quickly pulled her hand away. His eyes snapped open to lock with her worried green ones. Her touch didn't burn him like it had before, instead his skin tingled from were her fingers had touched him.

"Sorry," she quickly apologised, turned away from him to go while she grabbed her wallet. "It's our turn to enter."

Robert stood still, watching her pull out some coins for the haunted house before he finally snapped out of his fogginess state of mind. He couldn't help to touch the place on his cheek where her fingers had rested for only a second.

Katherine turned to face him. She stood at the entrance now with a warm and playful smile around her red lips.

"Are you coming?"

The giggle that reached his ears sounded like the old carnival songs from a hundred years ago. And Robert pushed his hands down his jacket, nodded and strode towards her.

The brown door squeaked when Katherine pushed it open and Robert felt great again. When the darkness of the house engulfed them both, he could practically feel Katherine's excitement all around them. And he didn't think about it, he just grabbed her hand in his to guide her through the house. Such a human motion yet, her hand felt warm in his cold one and it fitted so perfectly that Robert didn't question the gesture.

In the distance, in the library, Mike Hanlon poured himself a Whiskey and drank it in one go. He proceeded to search the phone-numbers of friends once lost. With hands that shook terribly, Mike first rang Beverley. The first of the Loser's Club and the rest would follow that same night.

Chapter Text

Katherine's POV

Apparently, the Carnival stood in Derry for the last two weeks in August. Ever since the first time Robert took her there, they met up every evening to visit the fair. The Summer heat had returned for a last time before Fall would take over the town yet, Katherine wasn't bothered by the warmth anymore. She even stopped cleaning up the house she currently lived in and started to enjoy Derry.

Mike Hanlon didn't show up anymore and the books were still lying around in her chaotic living-room when Robert came to pick her up. It was the last day of the fair and there was going to be a live band playing. A huge fireworks was scheduled at ten pm and Robert told her everyone would be home by 11 pm.

When the doorbell rang, Katherine's heart jumped in her throat and she felt the butterflies in her stomach. When she opened the front door and locked eyes with Robert Gray, a smile appeared around her lips while she let him enter.

"Come in," her voice cheerful yet tired. "I just need my shoes."

The red summer dress fell widely around her hips and she grinned to herself when noticing it caught his attention. For once, she would wear red heels and Katherine felt Robert's gaze travelling all over her.

She figured it out quite fast : red was his favourite colour. A few days ago, on the Fair, he had gifted her a red balloon which now floated at the ceiling of her living room. The thing didn't seem to lower, not even after a few days hanging up there. Katherine sometimes played with the cord, moving it to another place.

One night ago, she woke up to find it lingering in her bedroom. In the corner by the window. Although she wondered how it got there, Katherine slept with all the doors open and figured the summer's breeze from the open windows must have carried it to her bedroom.

"You look tired, my dear," his voice hummed from behind her.

"I sleep awful," she admitted while she slid into her pumps. "I think I must renew my medicines."

When she was ready and smiled at him, Robert was leaning against the doorframe and stared at her. He wore his black jeans and black shirt, simple yet effective because Katherine felt her throat go dry.

"I love red," he mumbled before he shook his head and gestured to leave.

"You do?" Her voice innocent but Robert glanced at her sideways with a playful smirk. "I had no idea."

She laughed when he sighed and put his hand to rest on her lower back.

"Little minx," Robert chuckled, a sound that send a warmth straight into her lower belly.

They walked together in silence, like they mostly did and when they arrived at the Fair, the sky was already getting darker. They were met with the glitter-like lights and the sound of live music. Katherine held her pace, making Robert do the same and look at her.

"Let's skip the haunted house today," she murmured and avoided his gaze.

She felt too proud to admit she got scared yesterday when Robert suddenly disappeared while they visited it for a third time. One more thing that made Katherine put a visit to the psychiatrist on the top of her list. But hers was in Portland and it would have to be through Skype. So, she didn't came to it yet.

"Why? I thought you loved haunted houses," something in his voice made her heart skip, and it wasn't in a good way.

"I do," she quickly said, still looking at something that wasn't there just to avoid his blue eyes. "It's just that I felt...uneasy."

Silence lingered between them until she suddenly felt two of his fingers lifting up her chin to look at him. A bright grin on his face but his blue eyes scanned every inch of her face.

"Then we'll dance instead," he offered gently.

"Dance," she scoffed and started laughing out of nervousness. "Oh no, really, I can't..."

"You caaaaan," he sung and took her by the hand to guide her to the wooden dance floor.

The cover band played older rock songs and when Katherine saw Robert dancing in front of her, trying to cheer her on to act silly together, she laughed loudly. His enthusiasm worked and before she knew it, Katherine was twirling around in his arms and snapping her fingers on the sound of 'Hey Mickey, you're so fine'.

She forgot about everything when Robert's large hands twirled her and pulled her against him. He repeated the movement a few times, which left Katherine dizzy in her head and her laughter echoed through the fair. Something that made Robert laughing out loud too and both of them didn't care about the looks the pair got from the others around them.

They sometimes stopped their dancing and bought some drinks. Wine for her, beer for him. Soon one became two and Katherine lost count when Robert gently dragged her on the dance floor for a ballad.

Her mind was fuzzy, in a good way, when he rested his hands on her lower back. His warmth against her and Katherine rested her head onto his shoulder. The lights danced around them while the slow guitar set the rhythm for their dance. She picked up on his faint breathing and looked up.

When a set of dark blue orbs gazed back at her, Katherine's first reaction would have been to take a step back. Robert's features were serious, almost angry-like when he looked down at her. For just a second, Katherine saw conflict in his eyes before his hands moved from her back to cradle her face.

She stood still, frozen in place when his fingertips caressed her skin. Katherine hardly realised she was holding her breath when his lips suddenly came crashing on hers. The kiss wasn't sweet nor gentle. There was an urge hidden inside it, a hunger she couldn't quite place. Yet, it stirred a heat inside her stomach and between her thighs and before Katherine was fully aware, her hands pulled him even closer to her. She tightly gripped his shirt until her knuckles turned white and deepened the kiss. Their teeth collided, their lips bruised and both out of breath when Robert broke the kiss.

"We should get you home," he suddenly spoke and didn't wait for Katherine's response.

He took her hand and guided her through the masses who were gathering for the fireworks.

They passed a gay couple having fun on the bridge and some young men who were following the couple towards the middle of the bridge.

Chapter Text

Robert's POV

He felt something burn inside his stomach and loins when Robert had grabbed her wrist. He pulled Katherine with her, not paying attention to his surroundings and licked his lips hungrily. There was something in the air : heavy and oppressive. It weighed on his shoulders and travelled down, like a hunger he never had before.

He quickly glanced at the gay couple and some guys behind them on the bridge. On another time, another place, Robert would have felt the violent electricity that hung there. He would know something was about to happen. Something that would make him hole again. Something he had been craving for since 27 years.

But his thoughts were with the woman who darted behind him. He could even pick up her breathing that was faster then normal. The way she had answered his kiss made him lose every sense of time. How her teeth had clashed with his and how Katherine had pulled him closer to her was enticing.

He felt the electricity, but for once in his existence, it wasn't violence that surrounded the air around him. It was something else.

The scream from behind him wasn't what made him stop. It was the outburst of pure fear that suddenly radiated off of Katherine. The astonishing dread that seemed to hit him in the back made Robert swivel around on his heels. Her gaze wasn't upon him but on something from their left. Her hands quickly shoved him out of the way of the upcoming truck that seemed to have lost control.

The vehicle went of the road completely and its lights were shining directly at Robert. Who was being pushed out of the way just in time by Katherine. He hit the pavement with his shoulder, but was on his feet again in less then a second. Faster then the human eye could see.

The fall didn't hurt but Robert was infuriated. With only two large steps, he stood before Katherine who was visible shaking and looking at the truck that came to a halt a few feet down the road. The sound of bells rang with every step he took and when Robert grabbed Katherine by the shoulder to make her face him, he had to hold back the growl that emerged from deep in his chest.

"Why were you scared," he demanded, his strong hands pushed on her shoulders and made Katherine hiss.

He had missed the moment that her fear had started to grow because he had been lost in his own thoughts. Robert had waited for this since they met, and now it seemed that he missed why Katherine suddenly unleashed a wave of fear that made him hunger to feel more of it.

She didn't reply immediately, which made him bend down towards her face.

"Why the fuck were you scared?"

The look of pain crossed her features but he didn't loosen his grip. He felt his eyes starting to glow and fought it when her bottom lip started to tremble. Katherine averted her gaze from him towards the truck and its driver.

"It was going to hit you!"

"Yes, I know that," he snarled at her.

"It was going to kill you!"

He took a step back and released her shoulders. His head tilted when it dawned on him and Robert's eyes grew wide.

"You were scared for me?"

She rubbed her shoulders where he had held her when Katherine's eyes locked with his. A nod was the only thing he got as an answer.

And it was as if he was punched in the gut and Robert had to try his best not to bend on his knees from the sudden pain.

"Your fucking fear is that something might happen to me?"

His voice was deeper then before, his eyes started to glow and Robert could see Katherine taking a few steps back. Anger and confusion was all he felt in that moment and he could feel his nails grown into claws. Claws that were hidden away for 27 years.

In that moment, Katherine still had anxiety and dread that hung around her. Her eyes locked with his golden ones and something inside him wanted to lash out to kill her. To feed on that beautiful fear of her. Yet, he didn't.

Instead he wiped the back of his hand into his eyes and squinted them closed. Carefully, so Katherine wouldn't see the claws.

"Go home," he hollered at her.

"Robert," that annoying gentle voice rang in his ears and he shook his head wildly.

"Go the fuck home and stay there!"

"What..."

That something else happened. The electricity that build up in Derry came to an outburst. Somewhere in the city, someone was getting beaten to dead and he suddenly felt a wave of insane happiness was over him. The laughter that escaped from deep in his chest was loud and high. The sound of a thousands of bells filled the space between Katherine and him.

"Run, my dear," he sang happily. "Run run run."

He could still feel her presence, but there wasn't any time to spare. Robert needed to be where the bloodshed was taking place. The brutality tingled all around him and he didn't want to miss it. He needed it. He hungered for it. And needed to feed.

His patience was gone. Hands came down and he stared at her with a grin. Baring his sharp teeth to her. Red lines slowly appeared as blood on his face, from his lips to his eyes. The skin of his hands and face peeled off to reveal ivory white flesh instead.

"Run!" He blared out.

The tears on her cheeks were noticed, but he couldn't care. He wanted her gone and felt some sort of relief when Katherine finally turned on her heels and ran away. Leaving the scent angst behind.

Chapter Text

Katherine's POV

The fear settled itself in her throat first ; her scream stuck in there and no sound came out. She wanted to scream, to shout or to groan. It didn't work. When Robert bellowed at her to run, Katherine was finally able to move her feet and bolted away from him as fast as she could. The sound of bells still ringing behind her.

She didn't dare to glance over her shoulder. Katherine was petrified from what she saw ; the golden eyes of the man she just kissed an hour ago had glared at her with a hunger that Katherine never saw before. The sharp teeth, the deep and harsh voice that had yelled at her, ... The image of Robert with peeled of flesh on his arms and face were burned in her memories.

When she finally reached her front door, her hands were shaking so badly it took her several tries to get her keys into the lock. Sweat drops on her forehead and the back of her neck, while strands of dark hair stuck on her cheeks and her breathing heavier then ever before.

But the sound of bells were gone... and Katherine dared to glance over her shoulder before she swiftly pulled open her door and locked it immediately. Her hands covered her mouth while Katherine slid down against the door. Her knees pulled up and she tried to hold back the loud sobs that threatened to escape her lips.

The image of Robert at the fair flashed before her eyes. The tingle of her lips, which she touched with shaken fingers to remind her of the kiss, was still there. Blue eyes that had gazed down at her right before his hands had cradled her face. The sound of bells. The scent of blood and rotten fruit. Yellow, gold eyes filled with rage.

Her mind was chaotic to the point it hurt her. Katherine's fingers clawed in her hair when she finally screamed out loud. She felt like she was going insane. She had to be. What she just saw couldn't be real.

With trembling hands, Katherine pushed herself up and carefully made her way to the bathroom. She needed her pills and would Skype her psychiatrist after she took them. Maybe there was a side-effect to her medication when taking it too long. Hallucinations. Her mind was playing tricks on her because of it.

She calmed herself down to the point she was able to take two pills from the bottle, dropping four in the sink by accident, and swallowed them with water from the tap. Using the cold water to splash it on her face and keep her eyes closed. Katherine tried to take some deep breaths in and out to help calm her down. It did and after some minutes she sat herself down on the edge of the bath. Head between her knees and she clumsily kicked off her shoes.

When Katherine finally calmed herself down, she took a deep breath in and let her head rest in her hands. Normally, her pills should have worked by now, yet she didn't feel any effect. But it felt like she had a grip on herself again and suddenly wondered what was real and what not.

What if she had started to scream into Robert's face for no reason? And just left him by the truck that had almost hit him? He must think she's a nutcase after he'd seen her running away like an idiot. She groaned to herself, cursed herself in her head and in a blind fit of rage, Katherine took her small bottle of pills and threw it against the wall.

The coloured pills clattered against the blue tiles, scattering it everywhere around her and Katherine sniffed through her nose. Wiping away the tears that started to form in her eyes and let the shower run before she took off her red dress. The dress she especially bought for tonight. A night she expected to go differently.

When the cold water hit her skin, she hissed, but let it run all over her. If the pills didn't work no more, Katherine would get new ones. Then she'd clean up this damned house and leave for Portland again. The chance that she ever would see or hear Robert again was small. Maybe she preferred to live with the humiliation without ever to face him again. No doubt, this small town would soon know about her meltdown and the strange looks would come.

After the shower, she walked to the kitchen when a soft knock on her door was heard. A glance at the clock told her it was passed midnight and three hours at passed since she came home. Katherine quickly pulled the oversized black shirt a little more over the matching shorts she wore before she made her way to the door.

"Who is it?" Her voice still shook and she cursed herself silently for it. "It's late."

No answer came, but another knock was heard and Katherine went to look through the peephole. A deep gasp got stuck in her throat and she quickly took a step back.

"Go away," she almost begged, her hand leaning on the door, "please."

"Katherine," his voice strolled through the wood, "open up."

When she stood on her tiptoes to look through the peephole again, two blue eyes stared directly at her.

"No," she whispered, forehead against the door. "I'm sorry. I can't. I need sleep and medication."

Silence until considerate footsteps took the last step up on the stairs that led to her door.

"Please," Robert's voice came through the door and Katherine hesitantly took another peek.

His eyes were blue, not gold. His hair a dark blonde as always, no orange showing there at all and his skin was as flawless as ever. Katherine was sure she had been hallucinating before and felt her face heat up out of shame. Yet, her graceful fingers opened the door and opened it.

Before it was completely opened, she was already on her way to the kitchen so she didn't need to face him immediately.

"Tea? Coffee?"

Again, she cursed herself in her mind for the shaking of her voice. Katherine turned to face the stove with the teapot as soon as she heard his slow step come to an halt. And she could feel his presence linger behind her. She shook her head, bit her lip and knew she had to say something. Her fingers absentmindedly played with the cord of the teabag while her other hand pinched the kitchen counter so hard her knuckled turned white.

"I'm sorry," she blurted out. "It's my medication. I... I've no idea whats wrong," she rattled, "Normally, I feel well. I didn't mean to freak out like that. I thought I..."

"Stop, my dear," his voice sang from behind her.

Katherine wanted to turn around to face him, but both his hands came to a rest on her upper-arms. His long fingers circled around them and Katherine looked down at them with an increased heartbeat. They were normal ; not white nor did he had claws.

His warmth leaned against her back when he took one step closer to her. Katherine closed her eyes when she felt Robert's breath in her neck and held herself steady against the counter. The cord of the teabag completely forgotten in her left hand.

The sob that threatened to escape her got stuck on her throat and made way for a surprised gasp. One of his hands travelled down on her arm, using his fingers to caress her skin and leave goosebumps all over. Slowly, Robert made his way to her lower back, lingered there for a few seconds as if he suddenly doubted his actions before it came to rest on her hip. His fingers slowly closed and Robert pulled her a bit towards him so that Katherine's back rested against his chest.

Chapter Text

Robert's POV

The warmth, no heat, that radiated of her body against his, made Robert almost chuckle with excitement. The way this human was trembling against him, not out of fear but out of .... Longing for him. That and the wave of despair that hung around Katherine, made him growl and his lips landed in neck.

He pecked the tender flesh, nipped it with his teeth. Careful not to break the skin and he could feel the moment Katherine surrendered under his touch. She leant back against him, arms loosely by her side while Robert let his hands rest on the counter. He had her locked in between him and the kitchen. The girl had nowhere to go. Nor did she try too.

Then it happened. The movement that set a fire in his loins he never felt before. Not even when just an hour ago, he'd killed the poor gay bastard who was beaten and dropped into the river. Not when he used the blood to paint on the bridge for Mike Hanlon to see. The line that would pull the man over the edge to finally be brave enough to call his loser's friends. 'Come Home'...

It was Katherine's hips that moved slightly backwards to meet his, that made Robert bare his teeth and move his hands quite fast. He grabbed her by the hips to turn her around. The moment her green eyes locked with hers, filled with lust, he groaned between his teeth before he pushed her up the counter.

His lips met hers in a fever unknown to both of them. The scent of roses filled his nose, yet it didn't bother Robert. One of his hands came to rest in her neck, keeping Katherine close to him and to hold her from breaking the kiss. His other travelled down to the rim of her top, but he got impatient with the small, frigid cords that would open it op. With one hard tug, Robert ripped the fabric off of her.

She gasped in his mouth and he felt the slightest ting of fear that radiated off of her. Robert moved a bit, pulled his head back and broke the kiss. Both out of breath and Katherine looked at him trough hazy eyes.

"I won't hurt you," he said, surprised by the words that came out of his mouth.

He meant it this time. The girl thought she was going crazy and in a few hours Robert Gray would be gone. He could finally have what he craved for for all these years he had to wait : the Loser's Club would come and he'd finish what they started. There was no need to kill Katherine. Although, he could. His slumber was finally over and he could easily rip her apart, limb by limb. And in his favourite form too ; the dancing clown.

Yet, he chose a different route. He'll let her live. He would have her first in a way that was foreign to him. Then Katherine would leave Derry, and he would let her. She was the exception in his rules.

She nodded, pulled him back in by grabbing his shirt and circled her legs around his hips. Robert snickered when her lips found his again. Her touch wild when her fingers roamed over his chest, to his neck and back again.

Robert helped her by taking his shirt off and Katherine swiftly moved by removing her shorts. She was naked before him, sitting on the kitchen counter. Long, slender legs inviting him in their hold and he didn't hesitate when he pulled off his trousers.

He grabbed her harshly by the hips again, one hand in her neck to pull it back by tugging on her hair. His teeth scraped the skin by her collarbones and he grinned wildly when his name rolled of her lips. Katherine's nails left red, angry lines on his back. A sensation that made him tremble with excitement while he quickly pulled her hips to the front and entered her.

Her head tilted back and when he started to move his hips, her legs circled tighter around him. The moans and gasps that were whispered in his ear, made his hold on her hips increase. His fingers leaving marks, and no doubt bruises in the morning, in the flawless skin of Katherine. She didn't mind, not at all as far as he could tell. She begged him to go even faster and Robert put his teeth into her neck while obliging her wishes.

This time, he did break the skin. And he tasted the blood on his tongue. The painful sensation of the bite, made Katherine suddenly cry out and he felt her walls tighten around him. Robert swiftly moved a bit back, his hands cradled her face and her eyes popped open to meet his.

In that exact moment, he felt her come around him. While her green orbs gazed hazily in his blue ones and Robert felt his own relief coming.

He murmured her name, whispered it while he came. His long fingers were tangled in her hair and Robert pulled back when Katherine softly kissed the corner of his lips. Out of breath and the pain in his stomach returned while he stared at her.

"Bathroom," was all he said and turned to leave her sitting on the counter.

He made his way through the house towards the small bathroom, swung open the door and threw it shut behind him. He cursed, he clawed at his stomach where the burning pain seemed to spread. The mirror before him showed half of his human face and half of his clown's. One amber coloured eye stared back at him.

He ran the tap, put his mouth underneath it and gurgled the cold water that came out of it. The scent of white roses lingered all around him and he fucking hated it! Yet, he didn't. Not quite. Confusion hit him as a brick when he realised he didn't want Katherine to leave Derry.

'But she must,' a tingling voice in his head rang and Robert took a few deep breaths in. 'Or kill her. Let her floaaat. Floaaaat with the others. She'll be beautifulllll.' The voice sang.

Robert looked back into the mirror, only to find two blue eyes to stare back at him. The porcelain white skin was gone, the orange tufts of hair too and the pain in his stomach slowly disappeared.

It took him a few more minutes before he emerged from the bathroom. Before he left Katherine in the kitchen, he had grabbed his trousers and pulled them on.

He found her in the living room. Dressed in nothing but a oversized red shirt and she bend over to pick something up. The drool the formed in his mouth while he watched her, was wiped away by his hand just in time when she turned. Bitemarks clear in her neck, but that disarming smile that Katherine had when looking at him, made him brass his knuckles a few times.

Robert was determined ; he would rip her apart. Make her float. She would be the first after his slumber. The first to float. The first that would see his true form ; the deadlights. After she's gone, Pennywise could focus on the Loser's Club. He could feel their memories coming back, one by one. Bev was first, then Mike. Poor Stanley wouldn't be able to cope and release himself from Pennywise's hold. One down meant the club would be less strong. He grinned by himself, unaware that Katherine was silently moving towards him.

It was only when her warm fingertips came to rest on his bare chest, Robert looked down at her and acknowledged her presence. She would indeed be beautiful while floating.... So beautiful. His fingers absentmindedly played with her hair, blue eyes gazed down upon her and before Robert knew what he was doing, her lips came to rest on his in a tender, soft kiss.

She had to stand on her toes to reach him, but seemed determined to kiss him. Her lips were soft and plump and the kiss was both passionate and shy. He felt her fear again. This time fear of rejection and Robert broke the kiss. His hands on her face and her green eyes stared back at him.

He doubted. He never doubted. In his mind, the dancing clown went frantic with rage and anger, but he ignored it.

"You have to leave Derry, my dear," he said, voice serious and he saw how her eyes widened. "Its time for you to go back to Portland. I will make sure your house will be sold and send you the money."

She took a step back, away from his hold and Robert was depraved of her warmth.

"What?"

He opened his mouth to speak again, but an urgent knock on the door made both their hands snap to their right. It was three am, most of Derry would be asleep by now. Another loud knock and Katherine glanced at Robert who just shrugged because he had no idea who it could be.

"Katherine? It's Mike. Mike Hanlon! Open up. I need to talk to you," the man behind the door said and Robert turned on his heels to completely face the door.

"Mike?" Katherine's voice was confused and she glanced at Robert again who nodded with a smirk.

"Open the door," was all he said and looked away from her. "Please, let Mike Hanlon in."

Chapter Text

Mike Hanlon's POV – a few hours before he's knocking on Katherine's door

The librarian had to get over his first shock before he made his way back to the library. The evening started at the fair for him. Looking around as he did every evening. Trying to find Robert Gray in the crowd and the new girl. Mike had observed them for the last two weeks. He needed to know more about Katherine and after tonight, he knew she was oblivious to who she sought company with.

Mike had read more history books in the passed few days then in the passed 27 years in his research. He had already read most of of them and opened them up a second time. Now that Hanlon knew the face of Pennywise in human form, he had a whole new look on the old pictures depicted in the old, worn books.

He learned that Pennywise had many forms. Even in human form it seemed the clown had its preferences of a body. Robert Gray as he was now ; a young, healthy dark blonde man, came in pictures of a hundred years old. Drawings of Derry when it first came to existence showed the young Gray at fairs, markets and events that were violent of nature.

Gray was never in the front of a picture or drawing. He was mostly in the back or the side, but IT always had its face towards the one looking at them. The grin, the empty eyes were the first Hanlon came to notice. He linked them with certain events in the history of the small town with a hint of violence. Quickly, Mike put two and two together : the young Robert Gray was the same as the clown, the older circus man, the balloon carrier, ...

He had watched Katherine and him from afar. And started to worry about the young woman who looked up at Gray with a sparkle in her eyes that even the bitter Librarian could see. And Robert seemed to enjoy her company. Mike knew it was all a façade and that Pennywise would kill her as soon as he could. The only question that was left unanswered was why he didn't get rid of her yet. Why didn't Robert kill during his time as a human? As far as Mike could tell, the clown never killed when he was human.

A question that would be left unanswered because tonight he picked up a police call on his radio. About a murder that happened near the Carnival. The woman who called it in, seemed genuinely upset but it was when the one of the Police Officers asked for back-up, that Mike frowned and had taken his jacket.

When he arrived at the bridge, he had heard the police men talk to each other. Saw one man in shock in an ambulance and a few officer who looked pale.

"There was a clown," the shocked man started but was hushed by one of the Paramedics. "He ripped his arm off! He ripped it off, off off!"

The unsettling feeling of dread and fear settled in the librarians stomach and he made his way down until he was under the bridge. That's when he saw it. In that moment he knew it.

'Come home,' painted in blood all over one of the pillars.

Mike had to take a small step back and take a few deep breaths before he was able to turn around to return home. This was the day that IT had returned. The murder on the young man underneath the bridge was the violent cataclysm IT needed. And now, Mike couldn't postpone it anymore. He had to call THEM.

He tried to contact them everyday for the passed two weeks but always backed out the last moment. Mike didn't want to break their bubble they were living in. He knew they were all successful in their own way. He had kept track of every one of his friends from the past. Mike didn't know if they would remember him... He had trouble with his memory, blanks that he didn't seem able to fill, and he wondered if Pennywise had something to do with. Maybe the others had forgotten him?

They did. He called them one by one and it took them all some time before they even recognised Mike's name. Eventually, they all decided they would be in Derry as soon as possible. Even if they forgot the promise they made, something made them agree.

When Mike heard every single one of them, he had tapped his fingers nervously on one of the old books that lie before him. Something nagged him about Katherine. Something that made him grab his jacket for the second time that night and walk out.

He could feel it in the air. Derry always had a faint whiff of electricity in the air. Filled with something dark whenever lightning finally hit the skies. It was if the whole town waited for the discharge. And tonight that finally happened. Now it felt as if the whole town held its breath for what was to come.

The walk to Katherine's house wasn't long from the library and when Mike knocked on her door, he half expected her to be asleep. He was surprised to hear her voice coming from the other side and the young woman didn't sound sleepy at all.

Mike was relieved when she finally opened the door and let him in. But that relief quickly disappeared ; Robert Gray stood in the hallway, only with trousers on and a bare chest. His blue eyes stared intently at the library and the sideway grin on his features made Mike hold his pace.

When he glanced from Gray to Katherine, Mike faintly noticed she was wearing an oversized shirt with boxers. Her hair a mess and his eyes involuntarily travelled to the bite wound in her neck. That's when Mike strode towards Robert and brassed his knuckles.

"You hurt her," he shouted and left a startled Katherine behind him.

Gray chuckled darkly, crossed his arms over his chest and smirked widely.

"I didn't do anything she didn't like," he countered and bend his head a bit to lock eyes with the librarian. "Why are you here?"

There was something dark in his voice that made Mike take a step back. As if he suddenly remembered what stood before him and that Gray was much more dangerous than he looked like.

"Mike, why are you here," Katherine's gently voice asked, but there was a hint of impatience hidden in it.

"I need to talk to you," he turned towards her. "In the library. Somewhere safe."

He urged her by taking her by the arm, trying to lead her outside. Mike had only one thought on his mind. Get her out of here. Away from Pennywise. A growl was heard behind him and when Mike glanced over his shoulder, he saw the ember coloured eyes he had feared since he was a child.

"Let go off her," a deep voice coming from the chest of Robert made Katherine pull her arm loose from Mike.

It was as if the young woman was unaware of what was standing in her living room. That she hadn't heard the growling voice, hadn't seen the yellow eyes and Mike swiftly turned to face Katherine again.

"I'm sorry, we have to go. I need your help with some research. Your grandmothers books might be of help."

"It's three am in the night," she countered and went to stand a bit closer to Robert again. Who smiled brightly while circling his arm around her waist. "Can't it wait until morning?"

Mike shook his head wildly. While Katherine kept her eyes on the librarian, Mike's eyes flickered between Robert and her. She didn't know, but Robert Gray was completely gone and replaced by the tall, dancing clown that brought back the deepest fear Mike had ever felt. The bells rang in Mike's head, almost to the edge of being unbearable.

Katherine had opened her lips, but Mike couldn't hear her through the sound of the bells. And the scent of heavy, sweetened popcorn filled the living room. So sweet and puny it almost make him gag.

"Mike, are you okay," Katherine's voice came through when bells chimed down.

The librarian nodded confused, saw the clown disappear and take the form of Robert again.

"Please, Katherine," he almost begged. "It can safe lives."

"Go, my dear," Robert spoke, and gently urged her towards Mike. "But get some trousers on first. I have ... matters to attend to anyway."

He smiled brightly, exposing his sharp fangs yet Katherine didn't see them. Robert let her go, went to grab his black shirt and pressed a kiss on her forehead. A surprising gentle gesture for a creature like him, Mike Hanlon thought. Gray passed by Mike, not even looking at him anymore but right before he exited the house, Robert turned on his heels.

"I heard your old friends are coming to Derry," he smiled widely, leaving a shiver going through Mike's spine. Almost paralysing him in fear. "Can't wait to see them again."

Robert left, closed the door behind him and left Katherine and Mike alone.

Chapter Text

Katherine's POV

Trigger warning : blood

She couldn't stop him from leaving, nor did Katherine try to hold Robert. She was too surprised and confused by the kiss on her forehead that still seemed to tingle on her forehead. The conversation that happened right before Mike knocked on her door, still lingered in the back of her mind. And Katherine suddenly wished she had held Robert from leaving.

A sinking feeling crept into her stomach, as if she would never see him again.

"Ready," Mike asked and she couldn't help but cast an angry look into his direction.

"No, I need fucking trousers," she muttered through her breath. "I hope its important."

She couldn't help the snarl in her voice. Katherine had other things on her mind than a trip to the library at three am in the night. And her mind was chaotic, so she swiftly took two other pills that were from her spare bottle in the bedroom before jumping in her trousers.

"Let's go," she brushed passed the librarian who followed her outside, into the cool air of Derry.

Katherine walked in agitated silence, not noticing how dark it truly was. There were no stars in the sky, the moon was hidden by clouds darker then ever and in the distance there was thunder rolling towards them.

The library was cold and she put her arms around her.

"Do you want a sweater," Mike offered, "the heating is off due to the expenses. Derry cannot pay the electricity bill and at the same time offer free books."

Her green eyes locked with his gentle brown ones. Yet, Katherine shook her head.

"No," she said curtly, "why am I here, Mike? What couldn't wait until morning?"

He offered her a glass of water and sat at a table with a pile of books. Some of them open, a notebook with scribbled words in them that Katherine didn't even try to read. Katherine sighed and eventually followed his example. It seemed he wanted to tell her something important and the librarian looked nervous. His hands were shaking and his voice trembled.

He looked scared.

For some reason, Katherine felt that her brain seemed lighter and found that the pills she had taken, finally did their job. Which was a relief, then she could comfort Mike, probably tell him it isn't bad whatever he wanted to tell her, and go home to get some sleep. She would visit Robert in the morning and have a talk with him.

"You're bleeding," Mike said, gesturing at her neck.

Katherine suddenly remembered Robert's teeth in her neck and took a handkerchief from the librarian to wipe the few drops of blood of her skin. She stared at it for some time before shrugging the thoughts of their intimate encounter to focus on the books.

"What is all of this," she asked, took one book that was open and saw some old black and white pictures.

"The history of Derry, or at least pieces of it," Mike replied. "You're going to think I am crazy, Katherine. What I'm about to tell you is all true and happened. I need you to hear me out until I'm finished."

She stared at him, put the book down and crossed her legs. Katherine nodded at him slowly as a sign to start.

Mike started his story, 27 years ago, about a group of outcasts who became friends during one summer after school ended. And about a clown that murdered a little brother of one of his friends named Bill.

Katherine had wanted to walk away several times when Mike was talking about the horrors of that one summer in Derry. She started to doubt his sanity and often shook her head. Yet, the fear that the man showed, made her stay seated until he finished.

"Now, 27 years later, I'm sure IT's back," he said and locked eyes with her since the first time he stared. "A murder happened last night. A horrible one and somehow IT returned. IT left a message for us, for my friends, to come home."

Silence after his words faded through the empty, dark library. The only light that was on, was the one at the table they sat on and Katherine glanced at the clock above the counter. She rubbed her eyes when realising Mike had talked for an whole hour and that she wouldn't get any sleep tonight.

A soft pop was heard from the back. Both heads turned to a door where it seemed to came from. Katherine frowned, but turned to face Mike again. He kept his eyes straight on the door.

"Rats," she said and shrugged. "Its an old building."

"We don't have r..."

Another pop. Louder this time and much closer by the back of her head. Then the scent came. Sweet and puny at the same time, like something rotten and it left a vile taste at the back of her throat.

"IT's here," Mike spoke and stood up, hands shaking and trembling all over.

Katherine didn't want too, but stood up just like Mike. The popping came more frequent and louder. Her hands tightened up, nails in her hand palms and thankful that her medication worked or else she would have had a flight response by now.

Something held her from looking behind her shoulder and instead her eyes kept on the librarian. He did the same, yet his gaze flickered sometimes away from her to the darkness that crept upon them from behind Katherine.

Katherine bit her lip when another pop was heard and she took a shakily breath in. She had to know what it was. She didn't believe in murderous, supernatural clowns and cursed that she let the story Mike told her get into her head.

She turned. Swiftly on her feet so her whole body now faced the direction where the smell and the loud sounds came from.

Nothing stared back at her. Except...

For a lonely, red balloon floating before her. The white string hung playfully underneath it and Katherine gasped silently. Involuntarily, her fingers caressed the rope, not hearing the worried voice from Mike behind her, while her gaze was stuck on the red balloon.

It looked the same as the one in her house. The one still floating somewhere between her bedroom and hallway. The one that refused to pop or even go down. The one that Robert gave her on the fair almost two weeks ago.

"Katherine, come," Mike urged, but she heard him as if he stood far away on the other side of the building.

Then it happened. The peaceful red balloon popped one last time. Loud and deafening it echoed through the empty library.

And she screamed. Katherine screamed so loud and tried to cover her eyes when the balloon that broke was filled with thick, dark red blood. The hot liquid spilled all over her, covered her with it. Hands, face and chest. The scent of sweetness and filth was replaced with iron and stickiness. A laugh was heard from a distance, but she couldn't see where it came from.

The blood covered her eyes and Katherine fell down when she tried to search for the table with her hands. Mike by her side in a heartbeat, trying to calm her down.

"Katherine, look at me!"

"I can't. Its everywhere," she shouted, trying to wipe the blood from her eyes so she could see again.

"It's not real," the librarian said with a calm voice. She never had heard him so calm before. "It's not real," he repeated. "Open your eyes."

She did as he said. Her eyelids heavy but eventually, Katherine was able to look straight into the face of Mike. She swiftly looked at her hands and chest to see where the blood went. There was none and Katherine was sure she started to hyperventilate in that moment because Mike tried to breath with her. Tried to calm her down.

"That's what IT does," he stated, "IT plays with you. Makes you fear IT. He wants to murder."

"He?" Her voice shook, her hands trembled but her mind was bright enough to pick up on the little change.

"Robert Gray. Pennywise in human form," Mike said.

Chapter Text

Mike had been talking to her non-stop about the clown and Robert Gray. Katherine stared at him wide-eyed and still in shock about what happened. She hardly moved from the spot she was still standing where the balloon had popped. A thousand questions ran through her mind and her rational side blamed it all on the pills she took.

"Robert's just a man," she stammered when Mike fell silent to gauge her reaction to his story. "He isn't some...psycho clown. I went to his house, I didn't see a clown suit, Mike."

She felt the hysterical laughter bubbling up from beneath her chest and tried to stop it. She failed. The laughter escaped her ; wild and loud. Her head back in her neck and Katherine couldn't stop.

"I'm sorry," she tried, tears streamed from the corner of her eyes. "I think I'm really going insane."

Mike bit his lip and his features turned sad and serious at once.

"I have pictures of him," he suddenly spoke, breaking Katherine's hysterical fit. "I have pictures of Robert Gray in all his forms. From Pennywise to the old Balloon seller on fairs. To his form of the young Gray."

Katherine glanced at him, wiped her tears away and shook her head.

"I'm going home, Mike. Make an appointment with my Psychiatrist, go to sleep."

She was already turning around on her heels when the librarian grabbed her arm.

"Look at the pictures. You can't go home. I know you're in danger. Gray will come for you," he snapped harshly.

She looked at his fingers around her elbow back to his face and pulled herself loose out of his grip.

"I suggest you sleep too," she countered back, rubbing the spot on her elbow where he'd grabbed her. "I'll pass by Robert in the morning. You're crazy, Mike. Robert's just a guy."

He did it again, pure out of fear because Katherine could read the desperation in his gaze. Mike grabbed her again and Katherine took a few steps back away from him.

"Let go of me," she murmured. "I promise to come back tomorrow and look at your books and pictures," she tried.

Mike let her go and nodded.

"Take them with you," he said and gestured to the books on the table. "Don't go to his house on Neibolt Street. He'll kill you. He's back, Katherine. IT wants blood. My friends will arrive somewhere tomorrow. You should meet them."

"Uhu," was all she said with an eyebrow raised, already picking up some books just to please him. "Sure, Mike."

Right before she wanted to leave the library, he took her by the shoulder and Katherine sighed angrily.

"What?"

"Didn't you lose a sibling 27 years ago? Isn't that why your parents moved out of Derry?"

Katherine gasped.

"You searched into my family history?"

Mike looked guilty and she felt the furious heat spreading on her cheeks. The books were clamped into her arms and Katherine shook her head.

"Don't ever do that again," she warned. "I swear, I'll call the Police on you."

She was finally able to breath in the chill air of Derry with the last words of Mike still lingering in her ears ; 'You can't deny what just happened here!'

In her mind a voice told her she could and would.

Arriving at home was a relief. Katherine threw the books on her kitchen table and swiftly put on the kettle to warm some water. The nervousness still raged in her body and if the pills didn't work there would be super anxiety too. Luckily for her, it seemed the medication from in her bedroom worked. Maybe the others were dated.

The soft sound of boiling water made her turn her head to the kitchen counter and quickly made her step away from it. The gift that Robert had given her on the fair, floated in the corner of the kitchen and only now caught her attention. She swallowed away the lump in her throat while Katherine kept her eyes on the balloon.

She waited as if it was going to move from itself, but it just floated there in the corner. Peaceful and doing nothing.

The sound of the kettle whistling made her jump up and curse out loud. Swiftly putting it off the fire and pour her tea, while ignoring the balloon in the corner. The sofa was cozy and her tea hot, yet Katherine felt as if she wasn't sleepy no more. Without being fully aware of it, her gaze always drifted to the kitchen behind her. The Balloon still present in the dark corner until Katherine cursed again, stood up and wrapped her fingers around the rope. She swiftly put it away in the bathroom and closed the door.

The books were lingering on the table. Hers and those that Mike had given her. All about the history of Derry. Maybe if she started reading, Katherine would be able to sleep. But she knew what it was that kept her from sleeping. Robert.

Not only did Mike's words still haunted her mind, the last words that Robert had spoken to her circled around her thoughts again and again. Eventually, daybreak came and Katherine stormed out of her house.

Making her way to Neibolt Street with a need to know what exactly was going between Robert and herself. And to warn him that the local librarian was delusional.

The whole way to Neibolt Street a voice in her head urged her to turn back. To go back home, pack her things and leave this crazy town called Derry. To leave the books, the balloon and Robert Gray to her memories. But Katherine couldn't. She would have done that three weeks ago. Not now. Not after spending day after day with Gray in his company. Not after what happened last night in her kitchen. The memory of them together made her fingers travel to her neck where he had bitten her.

The last turn right and she was in Neibolt Street. It was still silent. Everyone seemed asleep and Katherine quickly strode to the end of the street where Robert's house was. For some reason, she took a deep breath of relief when she saw the house like it always had been to her knowledge. It even breathed an air of comfort to her and Katherine swallowed hard before walking up the stairs that lead to his front door.

With shaking hands, she knocked on the door instead of ringing the bell. But the door swung open right after Katherine had touched the wood. Revealing Robert in the door opening.

"You're early," he said with a grin. "Didn't expect you so fast."

"What?"

He shook his head and gestured for her to enter. Katherine felt conflicted, not sure if she should step over the border and enter Robert's house. When he turned to look at her, to see why she seemed to hesitate, his blue gaze caught hers and Katherine smiled faintly when Gray took her hand in his.

She stepped into his house, felt the door behind her close and was met with the darkness that lingered in the house. No lights were on and it seemed every curtain in the house was shut because she couldn't see anything. Robert's hand in hers was the only thing that lead her through the dark house without Katherine tripping or bumping into something.

It felt like they were walking for a long time. Longer then it normally took to go from the door to the kitchen area where Robert took care of her burned arm. For some strange reason, Katherine held onto his hand even tighter when the frightening feeling came over her that she might get lost in this house. That it was changed. That is was bigger or even changed the hallways every minute.

"Robert?" The fright in her voice left it trembling and she suddenly wished she stayed outside.

"Don't worry, my dear," his voice gentle, soft...caring. "Don't be scared. We're almost there."

The grip on her hand became firmer but not painful. As if he was guiding her to his safe place. Somewhere no one could ever see nor touch them. Her fear disappeared and a feeling of serenity washed over her the moment they entered a room where the sun leaked through the curtains. Were white roses were on the dressers and the air seemed lighter.

She finally saw him again after walking in the dark and Katherine looked over her shoulder. The darkness of the hallway stared back at her. Until Robert closed the door and grabbed her into his arms. He pulled her against him, strong and gentle at the same time. His lips caressed the side of her neck where he had bitten her before coming to rest on hers.

Katherine gasped for air, her hands around his neck but she took a careful step back to lock eyes with him.

"Robert, I need to talk to you. I need to know..., I need..."

"Later," he growled, "I craved you," his voice deep while his fingers unbuttoned her sweater, "I missed you." His lips on her neck again and Katherine closed her eyes. "I need you."

"Robert...," she tried again, but her body betrayed her and before she was fully aware, her hands were busy taking off his black hoodie. Pulling it over his head and revealing his bare skin. Her fingers travelled over his stomach to the belt of his trousers.

Her gaze travelled up to meet his ; blue eyes staring back at her before Robert Gray softly cradled her head in his hands and made her move to the large bed behind her.

Chapter Text

Robert’s POV

It was different this time. For both of them. The first time it happened, it occured out of pure lust, and a hunger that Robert ever had before.

When he had left Katherine’s house, Pennywise had made his way to the Barrens first. Invincible for the people walking around him and a wicked grin on his face. Long legs carried him swiftly through the streets of Derry and his sharplike teeth sometimes showed when Pennywise smiled widely.

It would be a matter of days that all the Loser’s Club would be in Derry again. IT could feel it in the air and it made ITs mouth water. IT would taste their flesh and kill them for what those nasty, little children did to him 27 years ago. Maybe, he would let Big Bill float just like his tiny brother.

The Barrens were as they always been ; it stunk and was nothing more than a nest for rats. IT made its way towards the sewers, finding the entrance without a problem and strode through the filthy waters. Filth and dirt. All of the residents of this ratched little town.

Pennywise loved it and had missed this feeling.

It took merely ten minutes with his long legs to enter the wide chamber that he knew so well. Pennywise knew the sewers by heart and even giggled childishly when IT saw the room was still the same. IT could still smell the children floating in the air just above the pile of dirt that IT had gathered over the years.

The floating children were gone, the pile of dirt and garbage still there.

IT could see the vision before him ; in just a matter of days there would be children floating once more and Pennywise would feed from their fears. It almost made the clown dance with anticipation.

Almost.

Pennywise’s thoughts were suddenly overtaken by something else. Not something, but someone else.

Katherine. The wench that ran around in his mind all the fucking time.

IT gritted it’s sharp teeth together, let itself fall down to sit in the sewer water, pulled its legs up and closed its eyes. It was just a matter of thinking about her and the clown could see her standing in the library.

‘Time to play’ IT sung in itself.

The balloon accident was hilarious and the dread that came of her when the balloon exploded, made IT hungry again. Pennywise had jumped up, spattered the water around IT and started to move towards the tunnel that would lead him outside to the library.

Something made IT hold back. The clown stopped in its tracks, shook his head and growled angrily when IT suddenly doubted. IT never doubted about murder. Pennywise could feel something tugging deep inside IT. Something that pained Pennywise but, nonetheless, it seemed the clown was doubtful about killing Katherine.

And IT loathed that feeling.

With big steps the dancing clown made its way to the water hole in the middle of the chamber. Swiftly ran through it to end up in the house on Neibolt street. IT’s home for the last 27 years in human form.

The illusion was gone. The one that was used when IT was Robert Gray. Now, the house was old and dirty. And IT’s playground. Yet also where Katherine Miller had left her scent everywhere. The green of her eyes haunted IT. The laughter around her lips when IT had told her a dark joke.

The pain in Pennywise’s chest grew and a growl escaped its lips.

“NO,” IT screamed in agony when the clown saw how the white of its arms was replaced by the soft, pinkish skin of a man.

The transformation was painful but needed. Robert Gray was back again, although only or a little while. He could sense she was coming. Or he hoped that Katherine would find his way to him again. Robert needed her. Craved her in a way that was impossible for him to have.

When she had knocked on the door, Gray had made the whole house dark. In his human form, Robert wasn’t able to make the whole house look like before. Instead, he transformed one room and led her there. The pain in his chest still present and when Katherine finally stood before him, Robert felt some sort of relief washing over him.

He had kissed her, long and tender. It was as if the dancing clown and Gray were two different beings in this moment. Robert could hear the clown’s bells in his head, could feel the claws from inside his stomach urging to come out. Impatient to kill.

The killing would happen. Just not now.

Now, something else happened and it made Robert feel dizzy in his head. Katherine’s hands roamed over his bare back, fingertips tracing lines on his stomach while her lips kissed his neck and ears. She was soft, gentle,...almost innocent.

He had her in that room that wasn’t even real. Filled with the scent of white roses that would soon be replaced by the stale, iron like smell of blood.

Robert made sure to touch every part of Katherine’s body ; he caressed her with his fingers, careful not to scratch her skin or to break it with his teeth like he had done before. The moans and gasps that left her lips while Katherine lied underneath him, made the ache in his chest even worse.

She held him, legs around his hips and hands around the back of his neck. As if Katherine knew he would be gone soon. Deep inside, Robert thought, the girl probably was aware that this was the last time she’d probably see or even touch him again.

Her warmth around him became close to unbearable when Katherine’s sweet release hit him. The way her legs trembled around him, her hands searching for his and the way she held her breath. But it was they way her gaze found his in that exact moment that Gray felt the fire in his chest ignite while he had his own release.

The fire was painful at first but after a few minutes, it turned into a warm and fuzzy feeling. His fingers curled into her hair and Robert kissed Katherine long and passionate before he pulled away from her to roll on his back.

The warm and fuzzy emotion in his chest made it silent in his head. With a little movement, Robert reached for his cigarettes in the drawer next to the bed.

“Can I have one,” Katherine asked, her hot hand coming to rest on his stomach.

He grinned while glancing at her.

“You smoke?”

She didn’t reply, went to sit up and took a Lucky Strike from the package he reached up to her. Robert followed her lead so he sat next to her when both exhaled the smoke. Katherine’s head came to rest on his shoulder and he had to close his eyes to not shy away from her touch. Which was too warm for him. Too gentle. Too innocent.

Instead he laid his head on hers for a while, his free arm circled around her naked waist.

“You’re leaving,” she stated and Robert couldn’t do anything more than nod vaguely. “Will you come back?”

“No,” he replied hoarse. “I won’t. Not for a long time, my dear.”

He felt something wet on his chest and looked down. It stroke him to the core that Katherine was silently crying in his arms.

“You have to go,” he said, turned away from her and swung his long legs over the bed. He didn’t want to look at her anymore.

‘She’s pathetic!’ The clown roared inside him and Robert knew his time had come.

He was Pennywise and Pennywise was him. He couldn’t keep this up. He had been in human form too long and Katherine just slipped through his hate for humans. It had to end. He had to feed, urgently.

His teeth grew sharp again. The claws on his fingers appeared slowly and the jingle of bells slowly filled his head.

The soft rustling of sheets behind him didn’t make Robert turn around. He could tell she was getting dressed. His pink skin on his wrists and hands started to peel off.

“Mike Hanlon is crazy,” she suddenly said, “he thinks you’re a murderous clown.”

The chuckle that left his red lips sounded dangerous, even to him.

“Really,” he sung the word and felt the tinge of fear that came from behind him. “How ever could he think so….”

It was silent in the room for some time before Katherine spoke.

“I don’t know. Do you,” she asked and Robert laughed loudly.

“Time to go, my dear,” he whispered, his voice sounded painful and cheerful at the same time. “Go go go.”

The room filled with white roses started to loose its shape. The illusion of the perfect bedroom slowly disappeared around them. The roses lost their petals and turned from an ivory white to a dark red colour. He heard the trembled gasp behind him and stretched his long, pale fingers.

“You never listen,” he sang, “So stubborn. So … tasty, that fear of yours. Medication done its job until now…”

Bells again. All around them and this time not only in Robert’s head because the scream that came from over his shoulder told him everything he needed to know.

The orange puffs of hair appeared, he grew taller again and his whole body changed.

Dread filled the room, making Pennywise drool with hunger and he jumped up to turn towards her in IT’s full form of the clown. The wide, scared green orbs that stared at Pennywise in horror made IT drool even harder.

Yet, IT didn’t want to kill the scared and screaming woman in front of him. IT wanted her to leave. NOW!

“Go,” he roared. “There much more delicious humans to fed on! Go, go, go! I’ve got work to do! Performances to take care off! Go go go.”

The room around them wasn’t the same anymore and Katherine covered her nose against the smell. Disgust, fear and utter betrayal played on her features. All at the same time and Pennywise loved it.

It seemed like she was frozen in place, stared up at IT even when IT came to stand before her to look down on the young woman. The tears that streamed of her face, the sobs that escaped her throat and the way her trembling hand suddenly went up to touch Pennywise’s face… Her fingers touched the skin from ITs cheek, which made Pennywise hiss out of pain because it burned him. The smoke that came off his skin travelled up and up.

Chapter Text

Katherine’s POV

The sizzling sound when her finger touched his skin, made Katherine bit her lip. Her hands trembled, her eyes were wide out of fear and yet, it seemed that she wasn’t able to step away. Or rather, run away. Every fiber in her body screamed to Katherine to turn around and run.

The long, legged clown stood before her. A bit hunched over towards her, a snarl around his lips that exposed the long, sharp teeth. The pained, angry sound that came from the creature, made Katherine snap her eyes up to lock with his.

There was nothing of Robert Gray left. Before her stood the clown Mike Hanlon told her about. Even though, Katherine never saw IT before, not on a picture anyway, she instinctively knew what stood before her.

Her finger still rested on the ivory cheek and his ember like eyes stared back at her. Not the blue ones Katherine came used too. IT didn’t move, stood perfectly still, almost like a statue. IT was waiting on something.

Trembling and shaking to her core, Katherine let her hand travel from IT’s cheek to his hair. It felt dry and broken under her hand palm. Not the soft and shiny dark blonde of Robert.

And the sudden sob that she couldn’t hold back came out as soon as Katherine fully realised Robert Gray was truly gone.

“Robert,” she murmured and let the tears fall freely.

That seemed to get IT moving. It started with the loud, thunderous laughter from IT’s chest to grabbing her harshly by the throat with one if his hands. The claws dug into her skin while IT lifted her up from the ground. Katherine’s feet were off the ground in a second. IT moved so fast, she was hardly able to see IT.

The face of the clown was so close, teeth bared that Katherine could smell the stink of IT. It reminded her of sewer water, yet there was something sweet that penetrated her nose. Popcorn.

“Robert’s gone. He was never real,” Pennywise laughed and the grip around her neck grew stronger.

Katherine couldn’t breathe no more. She gasped and tried to cough, anything for that little bit of air that would bring her relief. Her lungs started to burn and Katherine’s hands came to rest on Pennywise’s wrists. She had little strength, but still tried to push IT away.

It only made IT laugh. A dreadful sound that filled the molded room.

“Pathetic,” he sung, while Katherine’s hands kept pushing.

She accidentally slid the clown’s sleeve a bit back, touched the bare skin and the howl that erupted from IT’s throat, send a tremble down to her core. The sizzling sound of burning flesh, and the smell, came her way while Pennywise dropped her.

The monster was in pain. And Katherine was the one who hurt IT.

“You little bitch,” IT growled and snapped IT’s head into her direction.

Katherine swiftly got up, leaning on the rotten wood of the wall, and started to back away from him. The clown didn’t come for her, just stood there staring into her direction.

Then Katherine noticed them ; the ember, golden eyes were gone and bright, blue ones gazed back at her. A little hint of Robert Gray shone through and it took her breath away for merely a second.

She came to her senses and finally turned to run out of the house. Which was nothing like it looked before. The cozy kitchen was now a dirty, dark place. Katherine could hardly recognise it. It was the white sink, now turned half green of mold, that gave it away.

The rest of the house that Katherine passed on her way out, was the same. It all reeked of death. And the sweet scent of popcorn that lingered in between.

IT roared and Katherine didn’t see or heard IT coming, but she could sense the clown was approaching. Fast.

Her heartbeat sped up to a frantic pace while she urged herself to run even faster. Katherine could see the front door, felt the tip of claws in her neck and pushed the door open with both her hands.

She stumbled across the stairs and almost fell down. Katherine managed to crawl up again, hands in the grass and pushing herself up, while her gaze frantically travelled across the yard. Even that was different. It was wild and overgrown by weeds.

A loud sob, both out of fear and sadness, escaped her when Katherine noticed the tall white roses at the far back of the fence. They weren’t completely white no more, instead thick, red liquid dripped of them. Tainting the grass underneath it.

The deep laughter that emerged from the house, made Katherine fully stand up and run. She ran. As fast as her legs could carry her. Away from the house on Neibolt Street.

Out of breath and trembling all over, Katherine tried to unlock her front door when she arrived at her house. When she finally succeeded, she left the door open just to grab the history books from her table and left again.

It seemed her mind worked slower then her legs because Katherine hardly realised when she arrived at the library. Only when she held her pace before the doors, she noticed that it was raining and that her hair clung coldly around her face.

With one hand Katherine pushed open the door, ignored the few visitors who stared at her and made her way towards the counter. An elder lady looked at her from behind her glasses.

“Mike Hanlon,” Katherine spoke, voice trembling and she knew it must look like she was hit by a truck.

“He’s upstairs in his apartment sleeping,” the woman spoke and opened her mouth again to say something.

Katherine didn’t give her the time, instead twirled around, books in her hands and made her way towards the stairs that would lead to Hanlon’s studio. She practically jumped on the stairs, skipped them two by two until she bangs on Mike’s door with so much force it trembled in its hinges.

“Mike! It’s Katherine,” she yelled, “Open up. Wake the fuck up!”

The librarian pulled open the door and scanned her up and down. Katherine pushed passed him into the small studio filled with books. She practically dropped the books she was holding on the table and pointed at them when Mike stood before her.

“Show me,” she demanded, trying to be strong, “show me your murderous clown. I need to know. Everything. Tell me everything.” She spoke fast, rattled and her voice broke. “I need to know what he did. What he is. Who is he? WHY HE DID THIS TO ME!”

She yelled and put her hand before her lips because she didn’t want to sound desperate. Mike had pity in his eyes and started shaking his head slowly.

“It calls himself Pennywise,” another male voice sounded from behind her and Katherine twirled to face a stranger. A man, roughly around forty, stood with his hands in his jeans, “I don’t remember eve-r-r-r-rything yet,” he stuttered, “b-b-b-ut, IT ki-llle-e-ed my b-b-brother.”

Katherine took a deep breath and shied away when Mike laid his hand on her shoulder.

“This is Bill,” he spoke. “I told you about him.”

Katherine turned back to the man with the jeans.

“Big Bill?” She asked, remembered the story that Mike had told her last night. The story she didn’t believe.

She turned back to Mike and shook her head while tears streamed down her face.

“I saw it,” she whispered. “I saw Pennywise. It wanted to kill me. It was Robert, but then it wasn’t.”

Chapter Text

Chapter 18
Katherine’s POV

Apparently, she fainted and bumped her head against the long table. Now, Katherine stared up in a daze to a worried Mike and Bill. Both looked down at her and she winced uncomfortable when she felt the sharp pain at the back of her head.

“Does it bleed,” she asked hazily, her hand travelled up and her fingers caressed the painful spot. Katherine was sure by now that she couldn’t see another drop of blood.

“No, but you did scare the hell out of us both,” Mike said while he helped her sit up. “Calm and easy. Don’t want you to faint again.”

“Sorry,” she apologized and felt the heavy hand of Bill on her shoulder.

“Don’t say s-s-sorry,” he stuttered and was clearly annoyed that he did. “W-w-we know w-w-what it’s l-like.”

Katherine glanced at him and used the table to pull her up to her feet.

“I’m fine,” she said more harshly than she meant when both men moved towards her.

Although Katherine was still feeling dizzy, she made it towards the other side of the table where the books were.

“Show me,” she said.

“Katherine, you should rest first,” Mike started, but she snapped her head into his direction.

“No, I don’t. I need to see it. Show me.”

It was Bill who moved and stood next to her.

“I-I w-wwill s-s-s-show you. If y-you s-ss-sit down,” he stammered and Katherine frowned.

It seemed like his stuttering only got worse but she didn’t dare to say anything of it.

“S-s-s-orrry, I n-n-n-ormal-lly don’t stutter anym-m-more,” Bill said frustrated and she shook her head.

“Don’t think about it,” she said and lifted her shoulders. “We hardly notice.”

Bill smiled at her and she answered with one of her own.

“Now, please,” she pleaded. “Show me.”

Bill glanced between Mike and her before nodding. He pulled a chair back for her to sit on and started with the books.

Katherine was mesmerized and shocked at the same time. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from the many pictures that were shown to her. One in particular stood out ; a black and white picture of a young man in a black suit. Even in the black and white coloured picture, his blue eyes stood out and that grin of him while Robert stared into the lens made her throat dry.

She suddenly pushed the books away from her. She had seen enough and was silent for a while. Both men left her alone so she could process it all. Mike went to call some other people that were arriving in Derry while Bill sat opposite of her in complete silence.

After some time, Bill finally spoke.

“W-w-what did IT d-d-o to y-y-ou?”

Katherine didn’t dare to look at him, her fingers playing with her the hem of her dirty shirt. Robert Gray never did her wrong. Nor hurt her. It was the opposite ; she was slowly falling in love with an entity that truly was horrifying.

“I didn’t know,” she said, still avoiding Bill’s gaze. “I didn’t know Robert was this…thing.”

Bill kept silent, but Katherine could feel the heaviness in the air. She shook her head slowly and bit back tears.

“And then suddenly, he was different. He was...not him anymore. He grabbed me. Wanted to hurt me,” she sobbed uncontrollably even if she tried to hold it in.

“IT’s a m-m-monster,” Bill’s voice told her, it was filled with gravel and compassion. “Don’t b-b-blame yourself.”

“I should’ve seen it. I mean, he has this dark sense of humour. He disappeared sometimes. He gave me this red balloon that kept floating around,” she took a deep breath of air and stood up to pace around.

She felt like she was losing her mind. Until Bill put his hand on her shoulder again and Katherine looked at him through her tears.

“Katherine,” he said without stuttering, “you’re not the one to blame. We’re h-h-here to kill IT.”

“He killed your brother, didn’t he?”

She remembered that Mike Hanlon had told her the story of the Loser’s Club and seeing Bill in real life, Katherine knew why Mike had told about him as if he was the leader of the group of children. He seemed so calm, so together. While she broke down.

Bill just nodded and let her go.

“Maybe he killed my sister too,” she thought out loud.

“It isn’t a he,” Mike spoke up, appearing in the living room again. “IT.”

Katherine nodded , but didn’t really listen.

“They’re all here, Bill. Except for Stanley. Maybe he won’t come.”

“Where do we meet them,” Bill asked.

“Chinese restaurant. I want you to come with us, Katherine. You aren’t safe alone. IT might come after you.”

Katherine nodded slowly and then looked at her clothes.

“I will need to chance before I meet your friends,” she said slowly.

Her clothes were dried up by now, but Katherine could smell the vague hint of sweat and the sweet popcorn scent still lingered in her hair.

“I’ll meet you at the restaurant,” she spoke up and gathered her things. “I’ll pass my home first.”

“You can’t be a-a-alone,” Bill said and moved towards her.

Katherine huffed and wiped her hair out of her face.

“Pennywise can come for all of us any moment he wants. Doesn’t matter if we’re together or not, right?”

She looked at Mike while posing the question and the librarian couldn’t do else but nod.

“Then, if he...IT, wants to kill me, it can do it now when I’m with you or when I’m alone under the shower.”

She shrugged her shoulders.

“Besides, I need my pills,” she muttered while walking out of the apartment.

Cleaning up didn’t take too long and Pennywise didn’t show himself while Katherine washed herself up. The only weird thing that happened was the loud pop of the red balloon that finally gave up floating. The red, flat plastic now on the floor of her living room. And she refused to touch it.

A million things ran through her mind, but thanks to her pills, anxiety lingered far away. When she was dressed in a jeans, black shirt and sneakers, Katherine grabbed her keys to leave towards the restaurant. Yet, she held back by her front door. Haunted by the blue eyes of Robert Gray.

“Why?” She asked out loud, fingers clenching around the door handle.

That was one thing her head couldn’t get around ; why did IT do what IT did to her. With her. A sudden outburst of anger rose from her chest and Katherine screamed.

“Why did you do it?!”

Katherine wanted to break something, get rid of the anger and how helpless she felt. An angry sob escaped her throat because she knew no answer would come. Relieved that no reply came because maybe IT would show up and that would be the death of her.

Right before she opened the door to leave, she glanced over her shoulder to a soft ruffling sound. The red balloon rose again, slowly floated up towards the ceiling and hung there.

‘I don’t know,’ the voice of Robert, not Pennywise, echoed through the house.

It was enough of a sign she needed to get out of her house, forgot to lock the door and hurried towards the Loser’s Club. Who all gathered in the Chinese restaurant around the corner by now.

Chapter Text

Katherine’s POV

Meeting the Loser’s Club, as everyone called the small group of friends, went better than Katherine had expected. She recognised Beverly Marsh Immediately because Katherine was a big fan of her clothing label. She wasn’t able to afford it, but still...big fan.

She met Richie Tozier, who seemed to find himself funny, and Eddie Kaspbrak.

“I’m starting to remember this fucked up shit, but I don’t seem to have any memory of you,” Richie said and blinked with his eyes a few time. “Shit, my lenses are itching my balls. Eyeballs, I meant.”

“Shut up, Richie,” Eddie said and smiled welcoming at Katherine.

“I don’t remember you either,” he admitted.

It was Mike who made sure everyone was seated at the round table.

“You can’t remember Katherine,” he spoke up once everyone sat down, “We will get to her later, if that’s okay for you, Katherine?”

She nodded fast and heard her stomach grumble wildly. A sound that made Bill chuckle who sat next to her. She grinned.

“Sorry, haven’t eaten in a while.”

Her eyes darted to the one empty chair at the table and during dinner, Katherine saw the others looking at the chair sometimes. With a dazed look, as if they couldn’t pinpoint why the chair was empty. Or who was supposed to sit on it.

Katherine figured it out quite fast ; every one of them who came from out of Derry, forgot what had happened to them 27 years ago. And Mike nor Bill tried to remind them. They all just talked about their daily lives.

Ben was a bit later than the others. A tall well build man who caught the attention of everyone when he entered the room. It was Katherine’s cue to look at Mike.

“Mike, why aren’t you telling them what’s happening? The whole clown thing?”

“They will remember soon enough,” was all he replied and went to greet Ben.

And they did remember. Right after dinner, the silence fell. Katherine had done nothing but listen to the others, asking some questions out of curiosity. Mainly to Beverly and her clothing line. And to her surprise, Katherine found the redhead nice to talk to and not stuck up. Though the woman must have a lot of wealth seeing she was one of the best designers out there.

It was that empty chair that bothered them. And it was Eddie who spoke up first.

“So, Stan isn’t coming?”

All eyes snapped into his direction and Katherine knew exactly when they all remembered. It was like they all took a deep breath and time stood still.

“Stanley,” they all murmured and Mike his gaze flickered into Katherine’s direction for a second.

“I called him, like all of you. He told me he would come. I don’t know where he is,” he said.

Ben crossed his arms before his chest and tapped with his right leg. He was nervous.

“Why are we here, Mike? I had no memory of you until you called,” Ben said and Katherine saw the others nod. “And now, I’m not sure if I want to know.”

“Pennywise,” Beverly whispered besides Katherine. “We’re here because of … Pennywise. That’s the name….of IT?”

She looked confused and scared at the same time. Not fully knowing what she was scared about. Katherine quickly excused herself to go to the bathroom. Not because she needed to go, but rather that she needed to get away from the tension that was rising between the friends.

And the fact that she was the only outsider. For some reason, Katherine felt like she shouldn’t be there when all of their memories came back.

The bathroom in the restaurant wasn’t too far away. Since Mike had booked a private dining room, the bathroom was just around the corner and when Katherine closed the door behind her, relief washed over her.

The chair opposite of the three sinks with the large mirrors above them, seemed like a gift when Katherine sat down on it. She didn’t care if the others would think she stayed away for way too long. Katherine decided sitting here was better while they all discovered their pasts.

And it had to suck to be them right now. Because Katherine knew too well how scared she felt right now.

“And I can feel it. Pills or no pills,” the hissing voice of the clown echoed through the bathroom.

Katherine her head snapped up and stared right into the yellow eyes of IT. Pennywise wasn’t really there, but in the mirror, staring back at her with a menacing grin. IT sniffed the air and wetted IT’s lips.

“I can tasssste it,” he sung, his long tongue roamed over his sharp fangs that were his teeth. And there were many of it.

Katherine was frozen while she stared at the clown who started to giggle.

“You look stupid as fuck,” IT said and winked playfully.

Yet, a shiver ran over her spine when Pennywise’s laughter was so loud, Katherine had to cover her ears. The soft cracking of the mirror glass reached her ears and Katherine looked up at it. The long claws on IT’s white hand scraped the mirror from the inside. First, Pennywise did it slow ; his slender fingers moved up and down. But, the monster increased IT’s pace until the clown was aggressively scratching and leaving lines on the glas. Like IT wanted to get out of the mirror.

The sound was deafening and tears streamed down her face out of fear that Pennywise might get out and finally grab her. She closed her eyes, hands on her ears and tried to make herself as small as possible.

“Robert, stop!”

Katherine’s voice carried loud and far, it seemed to bounce of the walls of the yellow tiled bathroom back to her.

“Stop, please,” she begged silently now, her eyes still closed firmly and expecting IT’s claws around her throat any second.

That didn’t happen. Instead, something caressed her hair, wiping it back behind her ears with one gentle movement. Katherine slowly blinked, still fearful that the clown wouldn’t be gone and toying with her.

Instead, she locked eyes with Robert who knelt down before her, supporting himself on one knee while he looked back at her. It was him who wiped Katherine’s hair out of her face and she couldn’t help the tremble that went through her.

He didn’t speak, just let his gaze roam over her face and his thumb wiped away the tears. Staining her mascara, but Katherine couldn’t care less.

“Don’t cry,” he spoke, his eyes looked...sad.

“Robert,” she murmured and his gaze flickered to meet hers shortly.

“I asked you to leave,” he spoke up and she nodded swiftly. Scared that he would turn into Pennywise any second.

“You, you did, yes,” Katherine spoke and reached her hand out to touch him.

But Robert shied away from her touch with a hissing sound.

“That will burn me,” he hissed and Katherine noticed the white flecks in between his skin. “You burn me.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, not knowing where she found the strength in her voice. “I...I never wanted to hurt you, Robert.”

He stared at her for a few seconds before his lips curled up into a devilish grin.

“I do want to hurt you, my dear,” he said, but his grin vanished and Robert scooted closer to her. A movement that made Katherine move as far back on the chair as possible. “But I can’t. For some fucking reason I just can’t hurt you. Yet. I will, soon. I hope. You’re a distraction.”

The beautiful blue eyes that looked at her slowly shifted to yellow and Katherine sobbed out of fear.

“Why,” she asked crying. “I just want to know why you did it?”

“Did what, my dear? Searched your companionship? Fucked you twice? That was delicious by the way,” he laughed, but it sounded dry and humourless.

“I don’t fucking know!” He suddenly roared and punched the wall next to her head.

He tilted his head a bit to the left, as if he heard something from outside the door and giggled childlike.

“Playtime,” he sung and jumped up.

The black shirt and jeans replaced by the clown suit and Katherine closed her eyes with trembling lips. She hated the transformation the most ; the one from the guy who she fell in love with to the clown.

She choked on her own thoughts and snapped her eyes open. Locking eyes with Pennywise who stared straight back at her with wide, yellow eyes. The clown looked as surprised as she was. And Katherine muttered a curse now that she knew IT could read her mind.

IT wiggled it’s long index finger to her.

“That’s it,” Pennywise spoke in Robert’s voice, his eyes blue again. “That sentiment. Love,” IT spat at her, wetting her face with spit. “How...humane. I loathe it.”

With a loud poof he was gone out of the bathroom and Katherine was left alone again. She didn’t have time to regain her senses because the next thing she knew, screams came out of the dining area next to the bathroom.

Chapter Text

Pennywise’s POV (chaotic)
Trigger warning : Language and mention of murder and such)

I’m infinite.
I’m fear itself.
And I won’t ever bow down to a human!

They’re food and I’m on the motherfucking top of the food chain.

I have awoken.
I will kill them all.
Katherine as last.

She will float.

Her beautiful long legs around my waist.

No!

I hate love.
I hate humans.
I hate her.

I was here before the Universe was shit out by that turtle.
I’ll be here when it ends.
I will be the end of everything.

I will devour everything.
I’m the Eater of Worlds!

The way her fingers caressed my human form’s bare skin.
The way she moaned your false name in your ear.

Stop!

I will let her fear me.
Hate me.
Loathe me.

She can’t hurt me.
Little wench.

But she can hurt me. She can burn me.

I’ll kill her.
Rip her apart limb by limb.

No, let her float.
See your true form.
The deadlights.

Hahaha.
I’m infinite.
Indestructible.

First
I’ll kill the children.
Now grown-ups.
Still the same fears.

They’ll remember.
Everything.

I’m so hungry.

So fucking hungry.

I craved them.
I’m hungry for them.

I’m hungry for her.

Fuck!

They can’t beat me.

Stanley’s already dead. The little Jew.
One down.
They’re not as strong as 27 years ago.

But, Katherine joined their ranks.

She’s weak.

Yet, strong.

She can’t hurt me.

I’m infinite.

And I’ll bring fucking chaos to Derry.

I’ll kill them all.

Chapter Text

Chapter 21

Katherine’s POV (Like most of the time from now on)

She didn’t have time to think about her encounter with Robert/Pennywise in the bathroom. The screams from next door made Katherine stumble out of the chamber as fast as she could, knowing full well that the group of friends might be in danger.

The moment she opened the door, she saw something that made her stand completely still. Confusion hit her like a brick when Katherine saw the Loser’s Club fighting something that was...invisible to her. They were screaming, swaying their arms and Richie even hit a chair on the table. The wood splintered, and Katherine had to duck away when Ben suddenly swung a bat wildly around himself. Where he got the bat from, she would ask later, now, Katherine ran towards Mike.

“Mike,” she yelled, seeing the uncontrollable fear in his brown eyes. “Mike, it’s not real!”

He didn’t look at her, instead the librarian his eyes widened while looking at something she couldn’t see.

A plate was thrown into her direction by Bev and Katherine was just in time to duck away from the projectile. The porcelain spat against the wall in a thousand pieces and Katherine looked around her. She found Bill not too far from her and grabbed him by the shoulders.

“Bill! This isn’t real,” she screamed. “I need your help, they’ll listen to you. Please!”

At first the man didn’t look at her, but after Katherine shook him a bit, his gaze found hers. There was dread in his features, fear in his eyes but she saw something change when Bill really saw her standing before him.

“Big Bill,” she begged, “they will listen to you, please, help them.”

She used his nickname, trying to get him back to reality, but the man’s features changed while he looked at her. From panic to fear and back again.

“Katherine,” he finally said without stuttering, his hands came to rest on her shoulders.

She took a breath of relief, saw that he had snapped out of it and when Bill let her go to face the others, Katherine fell on her knees. Partly for being out of their way when they would realize it wasn’t real, and part because she felt exhausted and drained. Her own encounter with IT still lingered in the back of her mind, but something told her, these people in the room had quite more horrific things to get through.

Every one of them calmed down, eventually. Richie being the last of them and while they did so, Katherine had to assure and calm the owner of the restaurant that everything that they broke would be payed.

“What the flying fucking fuck fuck was all of that,” Richie cursed, rubbed his eyes and the others all looked disheveled.

“Pennywise,” Bev muttered again and looked pale. “We need to know why Stan didn’t come.”

They all agreed and started to make their way out of the restaurant, but Katherine took Mike and Bill by the shoulders.

“I need to rest,” she said, exhaustion clearly dawning on her face. It was like it was crashing down on her and Katherine was sure she couldn’t carry the tiredness much longer. It weighed heavily on her shoulders and Katherine couldn’t stifle the big yawn that escaped her lips.

Both men saw the tired lines on her face. Being the only ones that truly knew what occured between Robert and her, although Katherine skipped certain details, and were sympathetic for the young woman before them.

She said her goodbyes right before Bev was dialing Stanley’s number on her phone and Katherine made her way to her house. Entering and making her way straight to the bedroom. The house seemed colder than it was before, just like it was when she just arrived in Derry. Like it was before she invited Robert in.

Her head was too full and Katherine didn’t even undress when she let herself fall, stomach first, on her bed. She wasn’t scared that Pennywise would show up. At this point, Katherine was too tired to care. Yet, it was his clown face that haunted her right before falling into a deep slumber.

She dreamt. Or at least, Katherine thought she was dreaming. Hoped she was dreaming.

When Katherine opened her eyes, it was light outside, a light hue clouded her vision and Katherine sat up on the bed. Her mind was foggy and she soon realized she was completely naked. Pulling the blanket up to cover herself when footsteps walked the stairs, she heard them nearing.

She knew she should be afraid. She wasn’t naked when she dropped herself on the bed. Nor was there anyone else in the house when Katherine fell asleep. It didn’t feel like she slept. At all. And when the curtains softly closed on their own, shielding out the morning sun, Katherine vaguely knew this was a dream.

The door to her room opened slowly, the creaking sound of the wood should bring a shiver to her spine, yet Katherine felt content when the face of Robert peeped through. He held a tray in his hands and offered her one of his brightest smiles she had ever seen.

“Robert,” she whispered happily, returning his smile with one of her own when he put the tray with food next to her.

He didn’t speak, just leaned over her with one knee on the bed and pulled her close by the waist. His plump lips caressed hers and Katherine was more than happy to return the longing kiss. Fingers disappeared into his hair and she deepened the kiss while the white sheet dropped down to her waist.

“You have to eat,” he murmured against her lips and pulled himself a bit back so he could catch her gaze. “You have to sleep. And then, you have to leave Derry, my darling.”

His blue eyes flickered around her face, his long fingers cradled her face and Katherine felt the contentment slowly fade away.

“No,” she spoke, “I can’t leave.”

He sighed, sat beside her on the bed and leaned his long arms on his knees.

“You have to, Katherine.”

She pulled the sheet back up and scooted a little closer to Robert Gray.

“I ,...,”

She stopped talking when his face turned back to her. The beautiful blue of his eyes replaced by the yellow emberlike colour of Pennywise.

“We’re the same,” he spoke, Robert’s voice gone, the raspy voice of the dancing clown filled the suddenly darkened room. “I’m Robert and Pennywise. I’m IT. I’m the Eater of Worlds.”

He sounded calm yet his features contorted into a slight anger.

“And I will fucking destroy the Loser’s Club,” he spat at her. “They can’t destroy me!”

Katherine wanted to move away from him, but something held her in place. Like one of those dreams when you’re running away from something, but get caught in mud or water and aren’t able to move.

Her green eyes fixed on his.

“I’m giving you a chance to leave!”

His voice roared into the room and scattered the glass with orange juice on the tray. Katherine felt petrified, which made Robert laugh.

“What are you,” she asked, a tear streamed down her face which caught Robert’s attention.

He stared at the solemn tear reaching her chin and for a moment, his features softened. His orange coloured hues turned blue while Robert wiped away the tear before it could fall down.

“I’m more than you can understand,” he said lowly and locked eyes with her. “Your tiny, pathetic human brain wouldn’t understand shit. Even if I would take the time to explain everything.”

Katherine felt the hold around her lessen and she was able to move her arms again. Her fingers hesitantly reached for his face. At first, Robert pulled away from it, not wanting her to touch him but eventually, Katherine felt her fingers touch the perfect skin.

He closed his eyes and hummed. A content sound that came deep from his chest. Katherine swallowed hard ; her mind conflicted. Robert looked so relaxed, not a sign of the murderous creature he really was.

“You feed on fear,” she suddenly started and he opened his eyes to look at her. “You always wanted to know what my fear was.”

“It’s Humpty Dumpty,” he said matter of factly and grinned wickedly. “That stupid nursery song about the egg. You hate it. You fear it. It’s stupid.”

She arched a brow, a part of her wanted to argue that the cracked egg was horrible, but Katherine held her lips sealed.

“I knew your fear when your pills weren’t working and my slumber was over, ” Robert spoke up, answering her unposed question. “Which, by the way, was also me!”

He chuckled a bit darkly before he stood up, pulled the curtains open and stared outside. Drool dripped from his chin. Katherine was completely released from his hold and stood behind him in a second.

“Did you kill my sister,” she asked and stood next to Robert.

He shook his head, much to her surprise and when he looked down at her, his yellow emberlike orbs were back.

“Unfortunately, I can’t take credit for that one,” he grinned. “I had nothing to do with the accident. Nothing to do with the fact that you saw how your big sis got run over by a truck. Pity,” he licked his lips, which made Katherine took a small step back. “The fear she must have felt when that truck’s brakes…”

“Shut up!”

Her voice high and pitched, trembling hands next to her side balled into fists. Robert looked down at her again, wiped away the drool and grabbed her by the shoulders.

“Leave Derry. Or I’ll make sure you’ll hate me first before I slowly rip you apart,” he growled, snapped his fingers and Katherine shot up straight in her bed with a loud gasp.

Chapter Text

Chapter 22

Trigger warning : language! (Seriously, racist language here! If that triggers you, please skip the last paragraphs. I hated using to write it, but it is the character!)

Waking up wasn’t a slow process. Katherine needed to splash cold water in her face, take her meds with hands that shook terribly and found out she had several missed calls. All of Mike.

She jumped in a clean pair of jeans and black long sleeve while she ran down the stairs. The house was still dark, the curtains drawn closed and Katherine immediately switched on all the lights that she passed. Making the house bathe in light, trying to fight the darkness that seemed to loom over it.

Her fingers trembled, dialed Mike’s number and waited for his voice.

“Katherine, finally,” his voice came with a relieved sigh. “I have been trying to reach you for hours.”

“I fell asleep,” she quickly told him, grabbing her purse and searched for her keys. “I had a dream. I think.”

“You think?”

“It seemed too real,” she said irritated, not by him but because Katherine couldn’t exactly remember where she put her keys when coming home last night. “I’ll explain later. Where are you?”

“The library. Stan is dead,” he suddenly said, his voice distant. Almost sounded cold to her ears. “He killed himself after I called him.”

“I’m sorry,” she managed to say, not holding still and saw her keys hanging on the door.

She snatched them off, her gaze being pulled by something moving in the corner of the living room. The red balloon. Still there, still floating. A shiver went up and down her spine, but Katherine yanked open the door to stride outside.

“I’m coming your way,” she said. “Be there in ten minutes.”

“Be careful,” was all the librarian told her and Katherine heard the loud click in her phone, meaning he hung up on her. Katherine picked a coffee up on the way from the tavern she used to work. Her former coworker asked how she was with concern, but Katherine didn’t even hear it.

On the way to the library, a new emotion took a hold on her. Not only fear raged inside Katherine, but anger. Pure rage filled her core when she pushed open the doors of the library and walked into the dark, large room.

She saw Mike before he noticed her.

“Where the others,” she asked, making Mike jump up towards her.

“Didn’t see you coming. They’re either sleeping or busy to find their tokens to get their memories fully back. For the ritual.”

Katherine frowned, threw her purse on one of the reading tables and let herself fall in a chair.

“You make no sense,” she bluntly spoke and sipped of her coffee. “What ritual?”

“To kill IT,” Mike spoke, eyes wide and Katherine thought he looked a bit crazy.

“Can you kill IT?”

“We can,” he spoke, voice steady and Katherine sat a bit up.

“We?”

“Yes, Stanley isn’t with us anymore. We need you for the ritual, you’re one of us now even though you didn’t grow up with us. There’s a reason you’re here.”

“I’m here because that shithead decided I was a lovely toy to play with,” she spat angrily. “He wants me to leave Derry.”

“Will you?”

Silence. The question got her of guard and Katherine sat back again.

“I don’t know, Mike,” she replied honestly. “It might be the best thing to do. I don’t belong here.”

“You do. Else you wouldn’t be here,” he said.

Katherine waited, but there was no explanation or anything.

“So,” she said eventually, opening one of the history books that lay before her. Her eyes caught the picture of children playing on a black white photograph. “We just wait until the others come back?”

“Yes,” Mike replied, proceeded with whatever he was doing and Katherine just didn’t ask. She wouldn’t get a reply anyway at this moment.

She had no idea what the others were doing around Derry and Katherine felt the nervousness radiating from the librarian who kept himself busy with … nothing and everything. A feeling crept on Katherine, suddenly wondering if she would see all of them again.

There was a sound coming from the front, a soft bang of some sorts that got her attention.

“Did you hear that?” She asked while Katherine sat up.

Mike snapped out of whatever he was doing and looked at her.

“No,” he said, but believed her nonetheless. “What did you hear?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted and stood up from her chair. “Be quiet.”

It was shuffling. Of feet maybe? Like someone was dragging something. Or something was coming their way while dragging itself on the floor.

“Something’s here,” Mike now spoke up and went to stand by her side. “Be prepared.”

Katherine scoffed and glanced at him.

“How the fuck am I supposed to be prepared for an evil clown?”

Mike just shrugged, he might have laughed if they were in another situation, knowing full well Katherine was right. There was no way in hell someone could prepare themselves when IT showed it’s face. And you would never know which face IT would show.

“Miiiikkkeee,” a voice sung from between the books.

A surprisingly human voice which made Katherine and Mike look at each other.

“I’m here, nigger. Finally made iiiit. The face in the moon came for me,” although human, Katherine found herself taking a step back by the sound of it. The curse word sending a tremble through her.

“And who’se the whore, eh?”

Both Mike and Katherine couldn’t see where the voice came from, but whoever it was could see them. The librarian grabbed a chair and put it out in front of him. A ridiculous sight, but there were no weapons here.

“Who is it?” Katherine muttered but got no reply from Mike.

“I’m here to kill you. Finally, you little prick.”

Then he came at them. Roaring and bloodied. A man about forty years old, with the most maniacal look in his eyes that Katherine ever saw. She stumbled back, hit a chair and fell down.

Mike was surprised when he laid eyes on Henry Bowers, but had no time to think about it. He threw the light chair into the direction of the raging mad man. Katherine could see that Henry carried a large knife, sharp and glinsting in the light of the library.

She crawled backwards on the floor, trying to create distance between herself and the madman. Mike moved to the left, avoided being stabbed by Bowers in one smooth movement and disappeared between the bookshelves.

Henry didn’t even notice Katherine, he went right into pursuit of the librarian and Katherine stumbled up. Her breathing fast and hard, her brain thought fast and her fingers grabbed one of the lamps from the reading tables.

She heard screams, cursings and roaring. She swallowed the fear away and ran into the direction where she saw Henry disappear in.

It was still too dark in the library, making Katherine curse Mike for not putting the lights on. The only light she had was what shone through the long, but small windows on the left side of the building. Katherine tried to listen carefully, following the footsteps and realised there was only one of the men moving.

Yet, when she entered aisle three, she was met with silence and stood still. Her heart beating so loud, Katherine was sure that Henry Bowers and Mike could hear it. Eyes flickered around her surroundings and to her surprise, she found herself between the romantic books. Katherine always loved romance books and she felt a hysterical laughter bubbling up in her chest.

The laughter never came.

She crashed down on the linoleum floor when someone pushed her towards the ground. Katherine tried to break her fall with her hands, hurting her wrist in the process and hearing a loud, ugly cracking sound coming from it. She grimaced, didn’t feel the pain yet and turned herself on her back in one swift movement.

The madman glared down at her. A grimace on her face so wickedly that Katherine her breath got stuck in her throat. The weapon high in his hand.

“I’m gonna kill you first, whore,” Henry yelled, “you hear that, nigger! I’m going to kill your whore first.”

Mike didn’t show up, wouldn’t even had the time to show up because Henry bended forward and brought the knife down. Katherine puffed out, her right leg went up and kicked him on his knee as hard as she could. The knife nicked her calf, making her scream out in pain and reaching for it.

She wasn’t the only one screaming ; Bowers let out something between a scream and grunt before he stared down at her.

“I like you. Spirit,” he muttered and shrugged before the evil grimace returned.

Katherine tried to stop the bleeding on her calf, looked up and her bottom lip trembled when Bowers brought the knife back down towards her. She wasn’t able to move and all Katherine did was close her eyes.

“No!” Another voice roared, bounced against the walls of the library and made the bookshelves wobble.

Katherine snapped her eyes open, just in time to see how Henry froze and look around himself. It was as if he didn’t listen to the voice, not really because he just turned to Katherine again and tried to bring his knife down once again.

He was catapulted by an invisible force against a bookshelf, making it fall down atop of him.

Katherine looked around her, trying to see who saved her from Bowers. At least for now, because the man was already trying to get out underneath the heavy shelf. Throwing books around in the process.

“I thought that this was what you wanted,” he yelled and Katherine could hear the panic in his voice. “To kill everyone!”

There wasn’t an answer, but when Katherine looked at the end of the aisle, a red balloon gently floated there. And she just knew. Knew that it was Pennywise who threw Henry into the shelf.

She hadn’t time to think it through. Katherine saw how Henry Bowers was slowly freeing himself.

Chapter Text

23, Katherine’s POV
(Trigger warnings for...well almost everything. From language to blood and back again. Read with caution if this triggers you)

She tried to ignore the pain that radiated from her calf. It stung and was a sharp pain while Katherine tried to get up. Her wounded leg couldn’t be used, there was no way Katherine was able to use it to fully support her weight. So, she tried to get herself up by using the bookshelves as support.

Henry bowers roared and raged behind Katherine, still trying to get himself free from under the shelves. Books were thrown around and it seemed like he kept talking to someone. But the anger in his voice made Katherine move faster.

One step at a time. With every step she took, the pain from her nicked calf seemed to shoot through her. Her troubled gaze found the red balloon at the middle of the aisle and Katherine bit her bottom lip, trying desperately not to scream out in pain. There was no other way then to go into the direction of the floating balloon.

“Mike,” she screamed, but got no answer.

A glance over her shoulder told her that Bowers was getting up, kicking some more books around and Katherine realised she wasn’t moving fast enough.

“You bitch,” she heard behind her, but Katherine kept moving, dragging herself alongside the bookshelves.

Too slow.

She heard his footsteps first, glanced over her shoulders and had no time to react when Bowers collided with her. His arms circled around her waist from the back, throwing her face first on the ground. Katherine could barely break her fall by stretching her arms out.

The full weight of Henry Bowers collided against her back and she huffed out a deep breath. It felt like he knocked the air out of her lungs and Katherine desperately tried to claw forward. Fingers reached for anything to get a hold on ; between the tiles of the floor, the lowest shelf from the books, anything,...

“Mike,” she tried, her voice not strong enough when Katherine felt a sudden rise of dread rising in her throat.

Henry Bowers’ face was buried in her neck and he sniffed loudly.

“Flowers,” he murmured sickly in her ear and Katherine felt the tears well up in her throat when she felt one of his hands travel down her side.

“Let go,” she hissed, struggling against his hold.

Her struggle had no effect. Bowers only pinned her against the floor harder and Katherine felt his fingers rest on the side of her hip. She pinched her eyes shut, her fingers stopped clawing on the floor and took a deep breath in. A sudden calm washed over Katherine’s mind and when she opened her eyes again, her vision was blurry from the tears. But still bright enough to see the dark figure of Pennywise at the end of the aisle.

IT’s ember eyes glowed in the darkness of the library, its mouth half open and Katherine could see its fangs. The clown’s gloved hands were replaced by long, dark claws that easily reached his knees.

Katherine couldn’t see it from where she was standing, but just knew there was drool dripping from his lips and chin. And the hysterical laughter that was lingering in the back of her mind for days now, finally came out full force.

It sounded like a soft cackle at first, but soon filled the library.

The sound made Bowers stop with his fondling with the rim of her jeans and Katherine felt his weight shift a bit.

“Why are you laughing,” he asked confused.

Katherine laughed even louder when she noticed Pennywise took a few steps into their direction.

“He’ll kill you,” she cackled loud. “He’ll rip you apart and you’ll be forgotten.”

Henry Bowers didn’t seem to notice Pennywise slowly moving in on them and Katherine could easily be wrong. IT could be there to kill her instead of Bowers, but deep down she just knew IT didn’t like what it was seeing.

Bowers his hand circled around her hair, pulled her head up and leaned his next to her. Katherine could see his face from the side, could see the grin that played there.

“You mean the face in the moon? I’m here because he told me too, you silly whore. Whores never are smart, that’s what my daddy told me. He’s dead now, I killed that bastard,” he told her, as if that had to mean something to Katherine.

He shifted and Katherine could see in the corner of her eyes that Bowers had brought the knife towards her throat. The cold steel touched her throat and Katherine turned her gaze to the clown.

Pennywise took a few long strides towards them, only a few feet away when Katherine sobbed when the knife drew blood.

“Robert,” she sobbed and the clown stopped in his tracks.

She didn’t want to die like this, not with the filthy hands of a madman on her body in a small, dusty library in a town called Derry.

“Please,” Katherine felt the sharp edge of the knife deepen in her skin.

A pop was heard, the knife fell and a sudden whoosh of

The weight of Henry Bowers was off her and Katherine swiftly turned on her back. Her eyes widened in terror and Katherine crawled backwards. Trying to get as far as possible to get away from the sight before her.

Pennywise held Bowers by his throat up high, the man’s feet dangled a few centimeters from the ground and he made a choking noise. IT had pure anger on his features and Katherine heard a deep growl coming from deep in the clown’s chest.

“I told you to kill the librarian,” Pennywise bellowed. “I demanded not to touch a hair of her head.”

Another growl and the ember eyes turned red, his claws digging into the soft flesh of Bowers throat.

“You made her bleeeeeed,” Pennywise sung and opened its mouth.

Katherine froze, a scream stuck in her throat, unable to move or do anything when she saw how IT’s mouth opened wide. Revealing three rows of sharp teeth and a beautiful golden light chased away the darkness in the aisle.

The next thing Katherine saw was the swift snap of Bowers neck and how the monster ripped bowers head clean off. The sick cracking sound of bone and the loud thud of the head hitting the ground, made Katherine taste bile in the back of her throat. Stupidly enough, she was suddenly grateful that she hadn’t eaten breakfast that morning.

The clown took a bite from the dangling, headless body. The fangs sunk right in the upper arm and shred the flesh and skin before IT threw the death Henry on the floor. Pennywise licked his lips, like IT just had a tasty supper and wiped away the blood from its face.

“Imbecile,” IT muttered before the clown fully turned to face Katherine.

“Such lovely fear, my dear,” he sung, the library filled with the scent of popcorn and happy sounding bells.

Right at the point that Katherine thought she would surely die, or at least pass out, from dread, the clown form disappeared and made place for IT’s human body.

Katherine thought Robert’s face beautiful once, but seeing him now, blood smeared all around his lips and neck, made her shiver and tremble. The man laughed loud and bended down, crawled towards her with incredible speed until his face was just inches from hers.

Katherine could smell the iron of blood on his hot breath that now caressed her skin.

“No one can kill you,” he grinned, his finger reached out to touch her cheek, but he thought the better of it. “I will make you float when time is right. Float, like aaallll others. Hihihi,” he chuckled, blew her a kiss in the air and with a loud pop, Robert vanished.

Chapter Text

Chapter 24

Katherine had to order herself to move. For just a moment the thought occurred to her that she could just lie down and stare at the ceiling. Just for a while...until she was able to wrap her head around everything. If that was even possible.

It was the low sound of moans that made her crawl up and move. Supporting herself alongside the shelves and leaving a trail of blood from the wound on her calf, Katherine slowly left the body (and head) of Bowers behind.

“Mike,” she mumbled, and looked to the left and right when Katherine finally reached the end of the aisle.

No answer, only hushed moans of pain and Katherine tried to follow the sound as fast as she could. She had to let go of the shelf that supported her while her hand searched for her mobile in the pocket of her trousers.

The moment Katherine went to the right and saw the counter come into view, she held her pace. Mike was on the floor, leaning with his back against the counter and was holding his stomach. The moans came from him and Katherine made her way to him.

“Mike,” she muttered while she bend down. “Are you okay?”

The librarian looked up at her, his gaze in a daze but a half smile crept around his lips when he saw her. Katherine looked at his stomach and saw the amount of blood pooling around the man.

“Stay silent,” she ordered, put one hand on his stomach to help to build pressure while she dialed 911 with the other.

The phone rang, a lady answered and Katherine made sure they understood the urgency. Her own pain forgotten.

“Bill and the others,” Mike muttered and coughed.

Katherine nodded and searched her phone for Bill’s number. She didn’t had it and saw Mike’s mobile on the floor a bit farther. She crawled over there, unlocked it with the librarian’s help, dialed Bill’s number and told him to get his ass over to the library.

“Henry Bowers,” she said quickly, remembering the beheaded body some aisle’s further down. “He..he tried to kill us. Mike is heavily wounded, stabbed. There’s so much blood.”

“I-I-I’mmm on my w-way. I-I-‘ll call t-t-the o-o-ottthers,” Bill said, trying to hurry his words which made his stuttering worse.

“Bowers,” Mike asked when Katherine put the phone down and applied full pressure on his wound.

She slowly shook her head and smiled faintly at him.

“Don’t worry about him,” she nodded, “he won’t be any trouble. You just relax and keep awake, okay?”

The amount of blood that Mike was losing, made Katherine panic but she tried to remain calm on the outside. At least until the paramedics would come for him. A painful, short laugh came from the librarian’s lips.

“Did you see that mullet?”

Katherine locked eyes with him, arched a brow in confusion and then smiled brightly.

“Yes, Henry Bowers mullet, I noticed. Hard not too,” she replied and Mike chuckled, followed by a groan of pain.

“He had that since he was a teenager,” he said with a grin. “Ridiculous.”

Katherine smiled and sniffed at the same time, the pain in her leg throbbing angrily.

“Tell me more about your friends,” she asked when noticing Mike had trouble staying awake.

He told her about Bill’s bike Silver, and about Ben being a fat kid ; a fact that surprised Katherine seeing the Ben now was a well-trained man. How Bev always smoked,...

He didn’t get to Richie or Eddie. Or Stanley.

The sound of the paramedics and the police disturbed the two when they stormed in. Katherine had to let go of Mike so the paramedics could do their work.

“You’ll make it,” she said, unsure if she believed her own words.

Mike looked at her while one of the Paramedics gently took her by the arm to help her up.

“Help them,” he said to her, his eyes begging and Katherine bit her bottom lip. “Help them defeat IT. Please, they need you.”

Mike was out of sight, rolled into the ambulance on the parking lot while Katherine was helped outside to get in one of her own. Right before the doors closed, she saw Bill, Ben and Bev came running down the street.

“Wait,” she pushed one of the doors back open. “One of them need to join me.”

She waved at the three of them and Bill didn’t hesitate when he jumped into the ambulance. His gaze travelled over her and his features were pure horror. Katherine just realised she must have looked like she went to hell and back.

“Henry Bowers,” she said and Bill snapped his eyes up to meet hers. “I don’t know him. He wanted to kill Mike. Spoke about the Face in the Moon.”

The Paramedic who was treating her cut glanced up at her and Bill made a hand gesture to not speak of it at the moment. Katherine shook her head and pulled the blanket a bit more over her to keep herself warm.

“This is quite deep,” the Paramedic said. “It will need stitches and you won’t be able to walk on it for quite some time. We’re almost at the hospital. You will be fine, Miss.”

Katherine nodded and kept silent the whole ride. Bill had one of her hands in his and Katherine could feel he was nervous.

“He’ll make it,” she said. “Mike will make it.”

She got stitched up in the small Hospital of Derry. Katherine hardly felt something and they told her she could get cleaned up. Bev and the others arrived at the hospital too while Katherine was being questioned by the Police. They found a headless body in the library and wanted answers. Answers that Katherine couldn’t give without sounding as a raving lunatic.

The weird part about Derry that Katherine hadn’t noticed yet, was the fact that law enforcement didn’t really try to get to the core of a case. The missing children from years ago never made it to the news outside of Derry. The violence happening here wasn’t known outside Derry’s borders. And the people who lived here, seemed to forget about or simply not care.

That’s what happened when Katherine had told the Officer’s and the Sheriff that she had no idea what happened, except that the librarian and herself got attacked by Bowers. She was sure that in every other city or village she wouldn’t be allowed to go anywhere or would be taken into custody. Not in Derry, the officers just nodded while jolting down some notes and let her leave.

When Katherine came into the main waiting area of the hospital, supported by crutches, Bill and Bev immediately came towards her.

“Any news about Mike,” she asked and locked eyes with Bill.

“He needs surgery again, already had one,” Bev said. “But everything looks like he will make it.”

Katherine nodded, the pain in her leg made her grimace and she shifted her weight a bit. Richie and Eddie slowly made their way to her too.

“We needed Mike. You know,” Eddie said, “to defeat IT.”

Katherine locked eyes with Bev.

“You smoke,” she stated and Bev nodded with a grin. “Can I have one?”

“Sure,” the red head grabbed her pack of smokes and gave it to Katherine.

“W-w-we will need to d-d-do it without M-mmike,” Bill said.

“Without Mike and without Stan,” Richie scoffed, “we’re outnumbered. Well, figure of speech.”

“You have me,” Katherine piped up and the remaining part of the Loser’s Club all looked at her. “I need a smoke first, then we will see what we can do to get rid of Pennywise. I’m sure Mike had gathered loads of info out of his history books. Let’s wait until he wakes up.”

Chapter Text

Chapter 25

The crutches were hell to walk with and Katherine had left them in Richie’s car. He had proposed to drive her towards the small bed and breakfast where most of them were staying. The others made their way to their sleeping place on their own.

“What happened?”

It was the first time Katherine had heard Richie’s voice carry a serious tone and she glanced at him.

“Bowers,” she replied and shrugged. “I have no idea who he is, well was. He came in the library, armed with a knife…”

“Yeah yeah,” Richier stopped her, “I know that. How come you survived? You didn’t behead him yourself. I’m sure of that,” the man told her and then stared at her in shock. “Or at least, I hope so. Did you behead him yourself?”

Katherine turned a bit and fully faced him.

“No,” she said with a straight face and saw how relief washed over the man’s face. He wore his glasses instead of lenses, Katherine noticed.

“It was Pennywise,” she said and looked back through the window while Katherine ignored the heavy pressured silence that suddenly lingered in the car.

“Wait,” Richie finally spoke while he parked the car in front of the small, cosy looking bed and breakfast. “IT saved your ass?”

Katherine licked her lip because she sudden felt thirsty before she turned to Richie. She didn’t meet his gaze.

“Yes,” was the only reply she could give because that was the truth.

He shifted in his seat.

“Fucking fuckity,” he murmured, “why did IT do that?”

Katherine shrugged her shoulders, got out of the car (with less elegance she wanted due to her leg) and leaned against the door.

“Do you smoke,” Katherine asked and made a mental note to buy a pack of cigarettes later.

Richie nodded slow, gave her one and leaned against the car himself. The smoke filled the air around them and Katherine sighed.

“I don’t know,” she finally replied to his question. “I … we… I don’t know,” she said, frowning and watching her cigarette between her fingers. “I didn’t know he was a murderer. Didn’t know he wasn’t even human. He seemed so … human.”

Richie stared at her, she felt his eyes on her face yet he didn’t speak.

“I knew him as Robert Gray,” she went on. “Met hem weeks ago, months actually. He was different. I liked him. A lot,” the laugh that escaped her wasn’t a happy one. “He acted weird sometimes. Disappeared, got angry. Then he was really sweet, took care of a wound, took me to the fair. We spend hours talking and laughing.”

“Wait,” Richie moved next to her. “Are you saying Robert Gray and you…”

Katherine didn’t let him finish his sentence and threw her cigarette on the ground.

“I’m not saying I fucking love Robert Gray,” she spoke harshly and kicked her cigarette away from her. Though, the moment she said it, Katherine knew it wasn’t the full truth. No, she didn’t love Robert, but she was quite certain that she would have if there had been more time. Now, she just had the feeling that she was starting to fall in love with him. IT. The Clown. Whatever IT was.

She shook the confusing thoughts out of her head. A headache formed above her eyes and Katherine would be happy to never have this conversation again.

“Then what are you saying? That he saved you because he likes you? Fuck this is some cosmic fucked up shit,” Richie brushed his fingers through his curls and Katherine saw the others arriving one by one.

“I’m trying to tell you that it’s complicated,” Katherine murmured and looked up at Richie. “Robert used me. There’s no other explanation.”

The moment she said it out loud, was the moment Katherine did feel her heart shatter a bit. There was no denying that she liked the man that she got to know the last few months. He made life little less lonely.

Bill must have seen the sad look that crossed her features because Katherine felt his heavy hand on her shoulder.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she tried to smile, failed and shrugged his hand off. “I need my medication soon so I hope that there’s something to drink.”

They all walked in, Richie as last because Katherine could feel his gaze burning in the back of her skull. It felt weird for Katherine being in a group like this. She never had lots of friends, not even in college when she was in Portland. Somehow, the group she was in now, made her feel safe. Calm. Like this was exactly where she was meant to be.

Bev looked at her leg while the others sat down in the small, cosy main living room from the bed and breakfast.

“Does it hurt?”

Katherine smiled and shook her head.

“It throbs a bit. It’s still sedated,” she assured the woman who gave her one of the brightest smiles Katherine ever saw.

“Now that Mike is out of the game,” Eddie started, took his inhaler and used it two times. “What’s the plan?”

Everyone fell silent, faces down to their feet. All except for Bill and Katherine’s. They both glanced at each other and Katherine wet her lips.

“Mike said you were all busy today with something. I think he said to get your memories back?”

Ben was the one who moved this time. From the one side of the room he walked to the other and back again.

“Yes,” he replied.

“Did it work,” Katherine asked, her gaze following the nervous stance of the man.

They all nodded and before Katherine wanted to ask more, Richie shook his head.

“The question here is : why are you here? Mike is out, Stan offed himself,” all heads snapped into his direction. “Yet, Pennywise seemed to keep you alive for some reason because it saved your pretty ass back in the library. Fuck, IT even killed Bowers, IT’s little puppet, for you.”

Katherine felt attacked and stared at Richie, unable to speak.

“I,” she started, but had to cough to clear her throat. “I don’t know.”

Katherine admitted. She had no idea why she was here. Just that it was right to be here.

“Mike told me I was needed. I want to help.”

“You want to help us? We’re going to kill IT. Like we should have 27 years ago,” Eddie added. “The question is, people, how are we supposed to kill something monstrous like IT? It didn’t work the last time.”

Bill brushed against Katherine’s shoulder when he passed her.

“Mike had some sort of ritual. The ritual of Chüd. He showed me. We have our tokens from today. We need to make a sacrifice. We kill it with the power of Chüd.”

“Who the fuck is this Chüd guy,” Richie spoke up, his attention completely gone from Katherine.

“A turtle,” was the answer and they all stared at Bill as if he lost his marbles.

‘They think they can kill little old me,’ a voice sung in Katherine’s ear and she swiftly turned her head a bit back. There was no one there except that the hairs on her neck stood up while goosebumps decorated her skin. ‘I’m eternal.’

A chuckle echoed in her mind and Katherine had to blink a few times before she became aware that Bev asked her something.

“Sorry,” Katherine said. “I …,” she thought about for a few seconds, knowing it would only sound as if Pennywise had a hold on her if Katherine told them she heard IT’s voice. “I didn’t hear you. My leg suddenly starts hurting again.”

Bev nodded understandably. “I asked if you’re in?”

“In?”

Richie sighed dramatically. “Oh, great. She’s slow.”

Katherine shot him an angry look before turning to Bill. He smiled vaguely at her.

“We asked if you’re going to come? We’re going to kill Pennywise. For real now.”

Katherine looked at each one of them. All of the Loser’s Club stared back at her with determination in their eyes. Something happened with Katherine’s eyes. Or mind. The group of friends before her shifted before her eyes.

She saw children standing before her. A little redhead girl with wild, short, curly hair and fire in her bright blue eyes, a boy with glasses too big for his face, young Eddie with a pink polo shirt and a scared look on his face. Big Bill with his jeans jacket, the tallest of them all. Ben, who was a bigger kid, stared up at her with his big eyes, standing closer to Bev then before.

Even Katherine felt it. Their group wasn’t complete. Stanley and Mike should have been here.

The children waited for her answer and Katherine her eyes darted between them. She saw the horror written on their faces. Horrors that they were too young to face back then. Not only Pennywise, Katherine knew and saw it in their little eyes.

Bev didn’t have to say it, but Katherine had seen the bruise on Bev’s face and arms. The young girl before her carried the same bruises. Bill had lost his little brother to Pennywise, Katherine know. Eddie and his inhaler that seemed to be glued at his thigh in a small pocket. And Ben, obviously in love with Bev and lonely.

She couldn’t place Richie.

“K-k-atherine,” young Bill stuttered.

And she nodded. Slowly but determined. The clown couldn’t kill more children.

“I will help,” she said and locked eyes with an adult Richie. “I will help killing IT.”

Chapter Text

Chapter 26

“So,” Eddie scratched the back of his neck. “Where do we have to do this ritual of Chüd?”

After Katherine had agreed to help them kill IT, Big Bill had explained about a ritual of Chüd. She had listened, shared some confused looks with Bev and Ben, and had fallen back into one of the sofas.

“So,” Katherine sat up straight again and felt all eyes on her. “Chüd is a … turtle who is … good and made the universe,” she started. “And Pennywise is the bad thing that roamed the universe before our world was here. Decided to crash land on Earth in the time of the Dinosaurs. That place is now Derry and IT just...decided to stay here and feed?”

Everyone was silent and Katherine started laughing.

“You know how ridiculous this sounds, right? I can’t be the only one who thinks this is completely bonkers?”

Bev chuckled dryly and admitted the same.

“But it is true,” Ben added and Katherine nodded.

“I know,” she said and leaned back again. “We will do this turtle ritual…. I’m still not sure how that is going to kill something that, apparently, is immortal and has seen the fucking dinosaurs.”

She arched her brow while she felt like her brain was completely forsaking her. “What did Robert feed on when there weren't humans yet? Did he scare dinosaurs?”

Richie laughed loud, holding his stomach and dried his tears.

“I’m starting to like you.”

Katherine nodded, but didn’t reply. Her gaze found Bill’s, who was still waiting and tense.

“Like Eddie asked,” Katherine smiled weakly, feeling nervous herself all of a sudden, “where will we do it?”

The thought that flashed through her mind was that Katherine would probably end up in an asylum after this. Maybe she was already and was hallucinating everything. Maybe she never even got to Derry and met Robert. Because no matter how hard Katherine was certain that killing Pennywise was the right thing to do, she couldn’t get Robert Gray out of her thoughts.

The clown had murdered so many children that IT wasn’t allowed to live much longer and continue IT murderous rampage.

Yet, Robert Gray had treated her well.

“.. house on Neibolt street,” she heard Bill say and Katherine snapped her head up.

“Neibolt Street?”

Bill and Ben looked at her.

“That’s where IT lives. Underneath it. In the sewers that lead to the Barrens.”

As if that was all the explanation she needed, Katherine stood up and went towards the door. Unaware the others followed her slowly.

“What are the chances we survive this a second time around?” Richie asked.

“W-w-e got to tr-y-y,” Bill replied. “F-f-or Geor-g-gie.”

“And the others,” Eddie said right before he used his inhaler.

Katherine felt a sudden sense of deep respect for all of them. They were about to face their worst fear and there was a chance none of them would return.

“W-w-e can’t e-e-expect you to r-r-isk your lif-f-e, Kkkkatherine,” Bill said when they started their walk towards Neibolt.

“It’s worth little to me,” she said, her voice barely a whisper and shrugged. “I spend most of my life in a state of depression. The first time I got out of it, a clown out of a Cosmic circus popped up.”

Bev held her by the shoulder and had the most serious look in her green eyes that Katherine had seen. “You’re so brave,” she spoke and Katherine her eyes widened. “If you survive this, you have to do what you always wanted to do.”

“I don’t know what that is,” Katherine admitted and Bev smiled.

“Then figure it out.”

The woman left it at that and Katherine watched Beverly go and walk next to Ben.

The Loser’s Club, which suddenly Katherine felt a part of, walked in silence through the streets. The town of Derry was shrouded in a heavy stillness that seemed to weigh on their shoulders. All the way to Neibolt House, they didn’t see anyone.

Finally, they stood still before the old, iron gates that were broken. And Neibolt House, old and rotten, stood behind it. It looked so different then Katherine was used to seeing it. It felt different. The white roses that were blooming not so long ago, lay dead on the ground. Their white petals coloured deep red at the edges.

Her gaze travelled up from the roses to the door not so far away. She could still run. Change her mind and just leave.

Bill moved first, then Ben and Bev. Richie followed Eddie. They reached the door and Katherine took a deep breath in. Her hands trembled, her heart beated frantically in her throat. Yet, she followed. Because she saw the Loser’s Club as children again. Because they were the bravest young kids she would ever meet. They faced IT once and were now going to do it again.

Katherine followed….through the rotten, wooden door that was once painted a bright red. Into the house and into the darkness that was Pennywise’s lair. And she could have imagined it, but in the distance, far underneath the house, laughter reached her ears.

Chapter Text

Chapter 27
Pennywise POV

IT heard them.
Felt them coming.

Ever since they left the bed & breakfast.
Excitement took over IT.
Hunger.

IT would have to wait to feed.
IT would play with them first.

Then eat.
Who would IT eat first?
Drool dripped of his chin just thinking about it.

IT thought about that.
Until IT felt the door of the house open.

IT laughed out of pleasure and stood up.
Careful not to bounce its head on the low ceiling of the basement.

Yet, Pennywise stood still for a moment.
IT could feel the heartbeat of all of the Loser’s.

Not only the Loser’s, or who was left of them.

The frantic, beautiful heartbeat of Katherine.
The thumping echoed in IT’s head.
Nervous, scared.

She came with the Loser’s?
To try and kill IT?

The clown chuckled dryly, but without humour.
Pennywise didn’t found it funny
That little Katherine had tagged along with the Loser’s.

Pity, pity, pity
IT sung in its head.

One more to eat.
It decided and started to make IT’s way up in the house.

Chapter Text

Chapter 28

Katherine’s POV

The house inside was nothing like she remembered. There wasn’t the scent of fresh flowers, instead it was the sweet and puny scent of something rotten. The wooden ceiling and walls had black fungus that crawled up into the corners. Katherine swallowed hard and couldn’t help the tears that pricked behind her eyes.

He really did play a game with her. Even the house hadn’t been real, she could see that now. Not for the first time, Katherine felt conflicted about everything.

“W-we hav-v-e to s-s-tick together,” Bill spoke up. “Don’t l-l-et IT s-seperate us.”

Katherine just nodded along with the others and saw, with a slight grin, that Ben took a protective stance over Bev.

“Can’t fucking believe we’re back here,” Eddie muttered with ragged breathing.

All of them seemed scared. They knew what they were up against. Katherine lingered at the back while they made the way through the house. The wood creaked dangerously and dust flew up everywhere they passed. For a moment it crossed Katherine’s mind to ask Eddie to use his inhalator, but she thought the best of it.

‘Humpty Dumpty’

Katherine stopped abruptly in her tracks and turned towards the sing song voice. The childlike voice sounded far away. She stared down the long hallway and frowned slightly. The corridor looked longer than before, and it seemed her eyes played a trick on her because it seemed to grow.

‘Sat on a wall’

She loathed the child song that now echoed louder against the walls and away again. Another step away was taken from the group until a strong hand wrapped around her wrist. Katherine snapped her head back and gazed at Eddie who looked at her as if she grew a second head.

“The fuck are you doing? We need to stay together.”

Katherine blinked a few times while she looked at him.

‘Humpty Dumpty had a great fall’

“Can you hear the song?” She asked and turned her head back to the sound.

“No,” Eddie spoke and pulled her wrist. “IT’s playing with your mind. Let’s go before we get seperated.”

‘All the King’s horses and all the King’s men’

Katherine hesitated, felt Eddie tug on her wrist and slowly started walking with him. She always glanced over her shoulder into the hallway and gasped fearful when she noticed a silhouette standing at the far end.

“Eddie,” she murmured scared.

“Where are they?” Eddie cursed when he didn’t found the others.

“Eddie,” Katherine tried again, saw the short silhouette take a step into the corridor.

It looked like an oval with arms in the distance and Katherine stopped while she pulled herself lose from Eddie.

‘Couldn’t put Humpty together again’

Her heartbeat sped up frantically and was felt in her throat when the shadow walked faster and faster towards them.

“Eddie!”

Katherine was the one who grabbed him by the arm this time. Her grip tight around his upper arm which made the man turn around to face her. Eddie looked at her in confusion until his gaze travelled over her shoulder towards the corridor.

“What the fuck is that?”

He started to back away together with Katherine.

“Humpty Dumpty,” she murmured in panic and Eddie looked at her.

“The fucking egg?”

“Yes! I’m scared of Humpty Dumpty. Ever since I was a child,” she urged him to start running when the song was sung again.

This time, it was unbearable loud in their ears and the fat, oval with small arms and legs ran closer and closer towards them. Eddie grabbed her hand, pulled her through the hallway that never seemed to end.

‘Couldn’t put poor Katherine together again!”

The childlike voice roared into the small space, sending a chill over Katherine’s spine and when she glanced over her shoulder, she saw a large Humpty Dumpty. The eyes on the egg were angry-like, with heavy, thick brows knitted together. The lips were pursed shut and the arms clawed towards her.

She screamed. Loud and terrifying.

Which made Eddie pull even harder onto her hand.

“Where the others?” She asked.

“I don’t fucking know!”

There was fear in his voice, but Katherine ignored it while he dragged her through another hallway. How big was this damned house? Katherine could only remember the small, cosy one Robert had guided her through. This seemed like another house entirely.

“Bill! Richie!”

Eddie’s voice seemed lost in the maze of corridors that seemed to start spinning before their eyes. A sick feeling took hold of her stomach when long fingers tickled the back of her neck.

“Eddie,” she croaked, but the fingers slowly wrapped around her throat and pulled Katherine back.

Her hand slipped out of that of Eddie. Katherine saw him turn around to face her with wide eyes and an outstretched arm towards her. She tried to grab Eddie’s hand again. All out of vain, because laughter roared in her ear and when she felt some pressure on her stomach, Katherine’s eyes travelled down.

A long, white sleeved arm circled around her waist and pressed her back against something hard. Katherine didn’t want to, but she glanced over her shoulder and screamed when the bright, ember like eyes of Pennywise stared back at her. A red brim around IT’s orbs this time and drool tickled from IT’s bottom lip.

“Hi,” IT chuckled and glanced at Eddie.

“I’ll come back for you,” he sang and without too many effort, the clown lifted Katherine up and threw her over his shoulder.

Katherine her fingers found some of the loose hanging fabric of the clown’s shirt at the back and grabbed it to hold herself steady. A stifled scream escaped her throat when Katherine noticed how high she was from the ground.

Pennywise started walking and turned around a corner. Katherine took one last look at Eddie who stood still in the distance and hoped dearly he would find the others.

“Let me go,” she grunted, her fist pounded against the clown’s back.

She got no reaction whatsoever of the clown. Just that IT kept on walking, down another hall, down the stairs to what looked like a basement and Katherine pulled herself slightly up to try and see where IT took her.

“No,” she murmured breathlessly.

The clown swung its legs over a hole in the ground and chuckled darkly.

“Hold on tight, my dear. It’s a long fall.”

As soon as Pennywise was over the threshold of the hole, Katherine stared in nothing but darkness. Her fingers clung tighter around the long sleeved shirt of the clown and closed and Katherine closed her eyes.

‘Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,” Pennywise hummed while crawling down the water hole.

Chapter Text

Chapter 29

Katherine POV - The Sewers

Her shouts echoed against the tunnel walls and came back to her. No answer came of any of the Loser’s Club and after a while, Katherine gave up. Pennywise’s low humming in his chest, made her feel more than just uncomfortable and his calm, yet steady walk, had a certain rhythm to it, that Katherine start to feel sleepy.

“Scared of an egg,” IT hummed. “Special. Fun.”

Katherine lifted herself a bit up. Used her hands to push on IT’s back.

“Put me down,” she pleaded.

“No,” Pennywise responded and she couldn’t see IT’s grin, but somehow heard it in IT’s voice. “Katherine’s been a naughty girl. You didn’t listen to little, old Pennywise, did you? When I told you to leave Derry? Children who don’t listen, get punished.”

She let herself fall again, her fingers on the Clown’s back, playing with one of the lose ribbons that hung there. The water made a sickening ‘thud’ sound every time Pennywise took one of his large steps. The clown’s shoes full with dirty water and Katherine nearly dozed off when IT finally let her fall.

Katherine gasped for air when the cold water surrounded her. The little scream that escaped her sounded desperate while she crawled up and searched something to stand on out of the water. She found something and climbed on the rail on the side. Only then, she took the time to look around.

Pennywise took her to a large … lair. Katherine found no other name for the large chamber she stood in. There was water everywhere, except for the tower of rubbish in the middle of the room. The clown itself moved with large strides to sit on the side of the tower. IT’s long arms rested on his knees while emberlike eyes looked at Katherine who stood on the other side.

“What is this?”

Pennywise arched a brow and chuckled darkly.

“Home, kind of,” the clown said, loud enough for IT’s voice to reach her.

Katherine shivered from the cold, her clothes drenched and one look towards her hands told her they were coloured a light blue.

“I will die here,” she whispered and Pennywise jumped up in one swift movement.

“You will,” IT sang with a serious face. “Because little Katherine didn’t listen.”

“I couldn’t leave them,” she murmured and looked back at...him.

The clown was gone. It was Robert who stood there, except his eyes were ember coloured. Which made it easier for Katherine to remember the young man before her, wasn’t a man at all.

“You could leave me,” he stated, hands in the pockets of his black trousers.

Katherine laughed shortly, a dry and humourless one.

“I couldn’t,” she replied. “You’re the reason I’m still in this fucked up town.”

When she turned to face him, Robert’s face was blank. No emotions were written on his features. He just stared at her for some time before he finally moved towards her. Robert’s form was much shorter than IT’s clown one and he drenched himself until his hips.

He stood before her in a few minutes and Katherine pushed herself against the wall.

“Stay away,” she pleaded, her voice broke and Katherine realised she couldn’t handle it if IT decided to kill her in Robert’s form. “Turn back. Be Pennywise or Humpty Dumpty.”

There flashed something in Robert’s ember eyes that she couldn’t decipher and he hesitated before stretching his hand out towards her.

“Now is not the time to kill you,” he stated and when Katherine tried to move even farther away from him, Robert sighed annoyed and grabbed her by the waist. “We’re waiting for the others.”

He easily lifted her up bridal style and waded through the water with her. Katherine felt the cold water on her feet and instinct made her throw her arms around his neck. The happy, deep hum that came from Robert’s chest, made Katherine lock eyes with him.

“Why kill at all? You killed...so many children,” she sobbed silently.

“I’m hungry,” was his short reply.

When they reached the pile of rubble, Katherine thought he would let her fall, but instead Robert held onto her.

“Eat animals, like every other living being.”

Robert scoffed at that and looked away from her.

“Why? Humans are tasty,” he pouted his lips and Katherine felt her stomach sickly turn inside. “Just salt the meat.”

He let her go so she could stand on the pile of rubble.

“Let the Loser’s go,” she spoke without thinking. “You have me.”

Robert snapped his head in her direction so fast, Katherine imagined she heard a crack of the bones.

“Let them go?” He hissed, the rim around his ember eyes turned a crimson red.

Katherine stumbled a bit back when Robert took two large steps into her direction. His hands reached towards her throat, but he pulled back right before he could grab her. Katherine looked at him with wide-eyes, filled with fear. Robert shook his head slowly.

“Your fear is tasty,” he smacked his lips together. “I don’t want to kill you.”

Katherine trembled when his finger ran over her cheek to her throat and back up again. For just a moment, Robert’s face looked sad.

“I have too, though,” he croaked out.

With those last words he spoke to her, Katherine lost all hope of getting out of these sewers alive. The man before her slowly transformed in the much taller clown again and she had to look up to fully face him. The smirk that played on those red-tainted lips grew wide and Katherine pulled back even more by turning her head sideways.

“They’re here,” Pennywise chuckled and jumped up and down out of excitement. “Oh goodie. Let’s play a game, shall we? Let’s pretend the water is lava,” he spoke to her and roughly turned her face so Katherine had to look at him. “If you touch the water, I’ll fucking kill you.”

She looked up at him in confusion and tears in her eyes because his hand that held on to her chin, hurt her. Pennywise grumbled and rolled his eyes.

“Just stay here. I want to eat you last,” he spoke before he jumped around and disappeared into the shallow water.

Chapter Text

Chapter 30

The sewers of Derry

The hysterical sobs that left her throat didn’t seem to end. Katherine tried her best to get it together, but failed miserably. It was as if everything needed to leave her mind. All at once.

She had her arms wrapped around her knees, the tip of her feet at the edge of the water because Katherine was too scared to move further up the pile of trash. Her eyes glued on the calm, dark and dirty water before her, not letting her gaze travel up towards the floating children. Their eyes were empty, they stared into nothingness.

It was so silent. By now, an hour might have passed, but there wasn’t a sign of the Losers Club nor Robert. Or Pennywise. Whatever IT truly was, after their last encounter an hour or so ago, Katherine was sure IT needed to be killed.

She dried her tears. There was no use spilling tears over ‘Robert’ because he wasn’t even real. Never was. The young man who made her laugh and feel better, took her to the fair and bound her burned hand, had white roses in his house, and had the softest of touches when his fingers travelled over her skin. He simply didn’t exist.

The moment Katherine slowly stood up, her knees hurting because of sitting silent for so long, there was an echo of voices that came to her from the sewer lines. She screamed Bill’s name when Katherine saw him emerging from one of the pipes first. It was a mix of a wail and pure happiness that he was there.

Bill immediately looked in her direction and Katherine saw the others appear behind him. They all looked dirty, but the way Beverly looked took her breath away. She seemed to be covered in a thick red liquid, her beautiful red hair stuck on her face and neck.

“Katherine, come off there,” Eddie spoke while his eyes scanned the territory.

“I can’t,” she spoke desperately. “Robert’s here somewhere. He’s hiding in the water.”

The Loser’s all looked at each other before back to her.

“Y-y-you mmean Pennnnny-ww-wwise,” Bill corrected her and Katherine nodded slowly before she wiped her hair out of her face.

Her sanity seemed to crumble down around her and without her pills, a whole new level of fear and anxiety took over her.

“G-g-g-ood, l-l-et him come out,” Bill yelled loud.

Katherine looked over the surface of the water to see if something stirred there in the darkness. Yet, all was silence.

“Come off there, Katherine,” Ben spoke. “IT will kill you if you’re up there or not.”

She cocked her head to the side while looking at Ben. It was the truth and she felt ridiculous all of a sudden. Katherine didn’t speak when she lowered herself into the water. It reached her chest and was cold to the touch.

Wading through the water, Katherine was half way to the Loser’s Club when the Earth gently trembled underneath them. She held her pace, her arms a bit up so that they didn’t touch the water and locked eyes with Richie.

“What the fuck,” he muttered when the trembling underneath them increased frantically.

Katherine tried to remain her balance while the others held onto something, anything on the sides of the large chamber.

“Katherine, hurry,” Ben shouted and reached out his arm.

She was still too far away to even be able to touch his fingers and Katherine ducked away from falling debris that came loose from the ceiling. The movement made her lose her balance and something slippery beneath her made Katherine fall back.

The black water engulfed her as a whole, her back hit it first and with arms stretched, Katherine swiftly took another deep breath before going under.

She tried desperately to find her footing again, but the ground under water had turned slick and Katherine couldn’t get a good hold on anything. Due to the trembling, waves were created and every time she was able to get her head above water, Katherine was pushed under again.

She heard voices in the distance and laughter that came from Pennywise.

“Help,” she muttered and got a mouthful of water before going under again.

No idea what was going on up on the surface and it was the least of her problems. The waves kept pushing her towards the slick ground and Katherine wasn’t able to get enough air. Her lungs started stinging painfully and her arms got tired of fighting against the supernatural current of the sewer water.

She used the last strength she had by moving her legs, trying to get above the waves one more time.

“Help,” she screamed and felt the moist air fill her lungs before she felt another wave push her down once more.

The last thing she saw from above water was Pennywise who snapped IT’s head in her direction. The clown was huge and Katherine thought she was hallucinating when she saw the clown had large legs.

She went under and gave up. Her strength was gone and the last thing that went through her mind was that Pennywise looked like a spider.

Chapter Text

Chapter 31

The final fight - Katherine’s POV

Her lungs hurt, that’s all she knew. She was too tired to even try and swim up again. The heavy current from the water carried Katherine back and forth and it was totally black. Her eyes were open, but she couldn’t see what was up or down. Limbs exhausted from trying so long to get herself to the surface.

Tired.

She was just tired. And drowning.

If Katherine died, she wouldn’t have to face the horror what was going on up there.

‘You’re not going to die,’ a voice unknown to her echoed through her mind. ‘You’re his weak spot. You can kill him.’

With all the strength she had, Katherine turned her head in the water to face a bright light not so far away from her.

‘Maturin is my name,’ the voice, strong and firm continued. ‘You can kill the culprit, the Eater of Worlds. IT has no emotion, except for hunger and fear. Never had, not since the beginning of us both. Until now. He feels for you, IT cares. And it hurts IT. Burns.’

Katherine didn’t feel the pain in her lungs anymore , it was replaced by wonder and amazement. She felt warmed by the light, although Katherine had no clue who Maturin was.

‘You’ll live to kill IT,’ the voice became vague, distant and the warmth made place for the cold of the dark water again.

If she could, Katherine would have yelled to stay.

‘I can’t,’ Maturin said. ‘I don’t have long. I’m dying.’

That made her sad, yet Katherine didn’t know why. In a second, the light and voice was gone and the burning of her lungs returned full force.

Her arms moved, slowly and painful, trying to put enough force to get herself to the surface and breath the stale air of the sewer chamber.

Katherine didn’t have to fight, didn’t have to swim because two large hands grabbed her by the waist and pulled her up without a problem. Relief washed over her and Katherine thought it must be Ben or Bill who had seen her struggle.

Her hands came to rest on the sleeves while Katherine’s face found the water’s surface and the first thing Katherine did, was take a deep breath in. The pain in her lungs worse than before, but another deep breath later, the pain subdued to a gentle burning sensation.

“Don’t die,” the man grumbled before her and Katherine snapped her head towards his.

Robert looked back at her, hair wet and sticking to his forehead. Blue eyes locked with hers and an angry scowl around his lips.

“You …,” she coughed, “saved me?”

A low growl emerged from his chest and the blue of his orbs turned ember in a flick of a second. Katherine still held onto his sleeves and didn’t think when she grabbed his hand. The touch on the bare skin of Robert, made him hiss out in pain. The contact brought forth a loud hissing sound.

He pulled back angrily and jumped up.

“Stay...on...the...pile,” he growled and grew larger. “I have business to take care of.”

IT turned, his legs grew larger and larger until Pennywise was spider like again.

‘You can kill him,’ the gentle voice echoed through her head while IT made his way towards Eddie.

IT’s voice bellowed through the cave with laughter and seemed to completely forgotten about her. The next sound was so harsh to her ears that Katherine jumped up. The tiredness completely forgotten while the cold water dripped from her long hair.

With horror and wide eyes, Katherine saw how one of Pennywise’s claws had pierced Eddie’s chest and pulled back. The scream she had heard was of Richie and everyone looked in horror how Eddie’s frail body fell down.

“No,” Katherine whispered in shock, her eyes flickered between Eddie and the others.

She caught Bill’s gaze. She only knew him for a short time, but his features told her everything Katherine needed to know when his cold stare met hers. Katherine clenched her fists and didn’t think twice.

She ran. Through the water without slipping, towards the Loser’s Club who were tearing Richie off Eddie’s lifeless body.

“I can kill IT,” she said to Bill who still looked at her.

“How?”

“Touch. If I touch IT, IT burns,” she quickly said.

“How?” Beverly asked confused.

“He loves me,” Katherine blurted out. “The part that’s Robert,” she quickly said, “loves me.”

“Impossible,” Ben muttered, a hint of disgust in his voice.

“Ooooooh, Loser’s,” the voice of Pennywise boomed against the walls and back again.

Debris fell down from the ceiling when the Spider ran towards the group and Katherine was pulled out of IT’s way by Bill. Scratching her elbow against the wall and she hissed out of pain.

The sound was caught by Pennywise who turned his head to face her with a frown on IT’s face. For a moment, Katherine caught his gaze, blue eyes stared back at her from a distance as if Robert wanted to make sure she was okay.

“Robert,” she spoke while she pushed Bill back who tried to pull her back. “Stop.”

It caught the Spider off guard and IT shook IT’s head in confusion.

“You have to stop,” Katherine spoke. “No more killing.”

“Little human can think she can command the Eater of Worlds?”

Katherine rolled her eyes and had enough with the arrogance the beast showed. Yet, she did a few steps closer to the Spider, giving the others time to get out of Pennywise’s way.

“No,” she said and shook her head sad. “I can’t command you. I can beg you, Robert.”

She had whispered his name. So silent that Katherine wasn’t sure he would hear her. Somewhere behind her back, she felt Bill slip something cold in the back pocket of her jeans. A movement that made Katherine squint, but she kept her eyes on Pennywise who stood motionless while IT looked at her.

“Katherine,” the voice that came from deep within the beast sounded nothing like Pennywise. It was all Robert and when the Spider seemed to charge towards her, the Loser’s all screamed while Katherine merely closed her eyes.

She braced herself for the impact, the pain and death.

Chapter Text

Chapter 32
Collision

The impact never came.

Instead she felt the familiar touch of two strong hands around her waist, a gush of air through her hair and a slight movement of her body that Katherine didn’t make.

Katherine had her eyes still closed when the scent of white roses filled her nose. Her brows knitted together in confusion, the warm touch on her hips still present and she could have sworn she felt his breath on her face.

“Open your eyes, my dear,” Robert whispered gently while his hands moved to cradle her face.

Katherine did as he asked, she couldn’t resist the sweet voice and when she opened them, she locked eyes with the most beautiful blue she had ever seen. And her insides hurt, her stomach turned and out of instinct, her hands came to rest on his. She rested for moment, taking in his scent and warmth.

“The others?” She asked with a shaking breath.

“With the Spider,” he said when she looked up at him again. “I wanted you safe.”

“You’re the Spider,” she choked out and Robert let his hands drop beside him. “You can’t be here and there.”

“I can. I’m … infinite,” he arched a brow and Katherine looked around.

They were in his room of Neibolt house. When the illusion was still strong. The bed untouched and white roses everywhere. The sob that escaped her was heart wrenching and Robert turned away from her, as if he didn’t want or need to see her cry.

“You have to let them go,” she pleaded.

“I can’t,” he snarled, but quickly regained his posture. “I can’t,” he sighed again. “It’s what I am. It’s what I do. I destroy and murder and eat. Then I go into slumber for 27 years. Then I do it again.”

“You murdered hundreds of children,” she gasped and wiped her angry tears away.

A dark chuckle came from deep in his chest.

“Much more, my dear,” Robert countered and leaned against the door, his arms crossed before his chest. His black tanktop and jeans, like always wore neat and clean looking.

“You’re a riddle to me,” he spoke to an unasked question that lingered in her mind. “You’re the first,” Robert wasn’t looking at her when he spoke, but at some point in the room Katherine couldn’t see. “My first. You see, your presence pains me. Burns me. Still, I don’t want to kill you. You infuriate me, yet…”

His gaze flickered back to her and Katherine bit her bottom lip.

“It’s called love,” she whispered and swiftly took a step back when Robert suddenly strode towards her.

Katherine bumped against a dresser and Robert placed his hands besides her on the furniture. Katherine was locked in and felt his warm body against hers. How could something so cruel be so warm? Be so kind while touching her?

“I don’t love,” he snarled at her, baring his white teeth.

Katherine took a shaky breath in and looked up to face Robert. Eyes still blue and she slowly realized that it was all Robert who stood before her. Pennywise busy trying to kill the Loser’s. They were the same, yet for some mystic reason, Robert was alone now.

Her shaking hands travelled up and touched his cheek. Robert closed his eyes and leaned against her touch. His face calm, no sign of anger in his features. He was beautiful.

“I do,” she choked out, breathing heavily. “And I fell in love with you, Robert. I still love you even though I know you’re a killer.”

He snapped his eyes open and let his gaze flicker over her face. Confusion and irritation both crossed his features at the same time. A growl, unlike the one Pennywise always did, emerged from his chest while his long, strong fingers crawled around her hips. With one hard pull, Katherine rested against his chest. The gasp that escaped her was both out of amazement and fear.

Hesitantly, her hands leaned against his chest. Katherine wanted to push him away, yet couldn’t. Her mind worked fast, saw all the faces of the Loser’s Club flash before her eyes, the Dancing Clown and the face of the Spider.

All that disappeared when Robert’s lips crashed on hers. Unmercifully and hard. Their teeth clashed together and Katherine’s fingers twirled in his hair. She pulled at his tank top with her free hand, closer to her and the smirk around his lips, Katherine could feel it.

Her heartbeat fast, uncontrollably thudding in her chest and out of breath by the dominating lips of Robert.

“You can stay here,” he murmured against her forehead when he broke the kiss.

His lips pressed a kiss on her hair while one arm hung loosely beside his body, the other leaned on the desk behind her.

“Forever, with me,” he whispered. “After the Loser’s Club is all dead, we can stay together forever.”

Katherine closed her eyes, held back the sob and tears.

“I think,” Robert hesitated and she heard him take a deep breath through his nose. “I think you are right, my dear. I’m in love with you.”

Katherine let out a painful whimper, her hand slowly moved to disappear into the backpocket in her jeans.

“I will stay,” she said and Robert looked down at her.

He looked almost childish now. His bright eyes sparkled with amusement and happiness. Something so foreign to him until now.

“Really?” He asked with a singing voice.

“Yes,” she said, pulled the cold steel out of her pocket while her other hand pulled Robert towards her again for a gentle kiss. “Yes,” she sobbed, tears spilled freely now. “Because I love you, Robert.”

He answered her kiss, slow and gentle. His hands cradled her face and Katherine’s eyes snapped open while her arm moved so fast, she had a hard time thinking it was her strength alone and that she had help from some force Katherine couldn’t see.

The knife pierced Robert’s skin, and Katherine heard him gasp in her mouth before he let go.
He stumbled back, surprise on his face when he looked down and saw the kitchen knife in his chest where his heart was.

The Earth trembled underneath them.

“What,” he started,but stopped when his long fingers touched the flesh around the knife and the blood coloured his hands a deep red.

Katherine pushed her hands before her mouth and cried.

“I can’t let you kill anymore,” she cried. “Robert, Pennywise must die and because of that, you must die. You told me you’re the same.”

He looked at her, his face pale and eyes still wide.

“You think you can kill me with a knife?”

He stumbled towards her, determination in his face while his eyes changed from blue to gold. Anger in his features and Katherine didn’t wait for him to reach her.

She lunged for him when she saw the first change from Robert to Pennywise when his skin started to peal of. Revealing the white, ivory colour of the clown.

“I’ll kill you, bitch,” the clown’s voice snarled, claws stretched out towards her.

Katherine moved as fast as she could before the transformation was complete. When she was in Robert’s reach, her hands took a strong hold on his wrists. There where the gloves didn’t cover the skin.

The clown wailed out of pure agony when the horrid, sizzling sound and smell of burned flesh drifted between them.

“Love can kill,” she snapped at him. “You almost killed me more than once, bastard. I can kill you now.”

One hand held on to his wrist, while the other moved to the knife and Katherine twisted and pushed even deeper. Pennywise stood completely still, his breath caught in his chest and the clown’s face turned to Robert’s again.

“Katherine,” he murmured and she looked up, her hand still around the knife as hard as she could.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled sadly. “I have too.”

A smirk around his lips appeared while a drop of blood ran down from his mouth to chin.

“I know,” was all he said before his skin started to peel off.

Underneath the soft, pink flakes of Robert’s skin wasn’t Pennywise, but grey rotting flesh. Katherine saw his lips curl up in a faint smile while Robert closed his beautiful blue eyes and with one, hard pull, Katherine pulled the knife out of his chest.

The Earth trembled again, much harder this time.

She took a swift step back when Robert Gray fell onto his knees. There wasn’t screaming, there wasn’t any roar nor curses that came from his mouth. It was silent while the Beast was finally laid to rest. In the room with the white roses that once were beautiful to Katherine, but now, the petals fell down in rapid speed. Coloured grey just like Robert’s body.

And he fell. The thud against the wooden floor never came. Instead, ashes flew up as soon as Robert touched the floor.

Robert Gray was gone.

Katherine held her hand before her lips to keep the hysterical sadness that she felt in her chest inside of herself. She knew he was a murderer, a monster. Yet, for her, a part of Pennywise, was only gentle and sweet.

The next time the Earth trembled underneath her feet, Katherine was hit by an old wooden beam against the back of her head. Everything went black and she surrendered to the peaceful blackness.

Chapter Text

Epilogue

Katherine survived the hash knock on her head by the falling beam in Neibolt house. She had no idea how or when, but when she woke, two concerned faces stared down at her. The sunlight of a new day hurt Katherine's eyes and she squinted.

“Did it work?” Her voice hoarse and when she tried to get up, Katherine decided it would be better to just keep laying down a bit more. Her body hurt and felt stiff when she tried to move her legs or arms. And there was this burning hole in her ribcage that felt empty.

“Yes,” Bill’s voice reached her ears and Katherine realised he was one of the two who stared down at her. “IT’s gone. Neibolt is gone. Half of Derry is gone for that matter.”

“What?”

Her face confused and Katherine turned her head to see the second pair of eyes that glanced down at her.

“Sinkhole,” Beverly told her and offered her hand.

Katherine took it and let them pull her up. Bill offered her extra support by waving his arm around her. Katherine took in the chaotic mess that revealed itself before her ; Neibolt's house was indeed gone, a large, black sinkhole in the middle of the street with firetrucks and people standing around it. One of them, being the neighbour of Robert.

She hissed when the burning in her chest grew when thinking about him. Katherine never wanted to think of Robert or Pennywise again. Or about Derry. She made herself pull away from Bevv and Bill, standing on her own feet. Her hair clung to her face, jeans and shirt drenched with both black, sticky water as blood.

The sunshine seemed so out of place, making the chaos in her head even worse. It was supposed to be dark because of the horrors that happened to her and Derry. And bile rose in her throat when Katherine realised that she hated Derry.

“I’m going,” she muttered and turned to face the others, still wobbly on her feet. “I need to leave.”

Over Bill’s shoulder she could see Richie and Ben. A small nod towards them was Katherine’s goodbye and she turned on her heels, trying to remember which way to go home too. A home she couldn’t wait to leave behind.

“Katherine,” Bill’s gentle voice coaxed her to face him again. “Thank you for your help.”

There wasn’t a stutter anymore and Katherine could muster up a sad smile.

“You’re welcome,” she mumbled, but there was a deep sadness in her voice. “It turned out IT wasn’t all...a monster. A small part of IT wasn’t.”

Bill frowned, but said nothing.

“Still, you killed him,” he said, using him instead of IT.

“I had too,” Katherine said and nodded one more time. “Take care, Loser’s.”

Bill laughed sincerely. “You too, Kath.”

Katherine went on her way. Her mind was a bit a blur when she got home and took her belongings into a suitcase. She threw the cases into the back of her old pick up truck and never looked back when Katherine saw the sign “You’re leaving Derry”.

She went back to Portland and sold the house in Derry through a Real Estate office. When the money came, Katherine left Portland two years later for a job offer in a small, rural town to the East.

Two years passed. Two years filled with nightmares about a clown that came to kill her. Two years filled with a deep sadness and a hole in her ribcage that she couldn’t seem to fill. It didn’t matter how many pills her psychiatrist told her to take ; they didn’t work.

Yet, when she drove through the small streets that led her through forests and alongside a beautiful cliff that had a lake, Katherine did smile. Her window was turned down, the cool September wind in her hair and on her face. It would be a new start for her. Maybe one where she could finally forget about Robert and Derry.

After she left Derry, Katherine had contact with Big Bill a few times. But, it eventually watered down to text messages until he never replied again. It was as if he had forgotten about her completely. Katherine had given up and deleted his phone number. She had tried to call Mike Hanlon a few weeks after she arrived back in Portland. The first thing he asked was ‘Katherine who?’

Her new house in the countryside was small : one bedroom, a small bathroom and kitchenette. The garden though, the garden was beautiful. The sight Katherine got the first morning she woke up there took her breath away. It was misty and all a soft green that met her eye. She had sat on her bed, staring outside for at least half an hour before truly getting up.

Today was the day. The first day at her new job. The small town had only one big company specialized in medical research and they searched for a secretary with the right kind of knowledge. Katherine wasn’t medical trained whatsoever, but she was great with languages and apparently, that’s what triggered them to invite her for a Skype call in the first place.

It went fast after that, they offered her a 38-hr contract, a deposit on her pay to pay the first three months of rent and Katherine didn’t think about it twice. She needed a fresh start, to need somewhere else, meet new people. Although, she probably would just stick to her own.

Now that she stood before the main entrance on her first day, her sweaty hands tried to smooth out her skirt that was neatly ironed before she left. The white blouse was impeccable and her nails painted a soft red. The make up she wore wasn’t a lot ; mascara and light lip gloss.

It was the first time she was going to meet the CEO and she was told he was her age. Quite young to be a CEO for such a big company, but maybe that was a good thing. Maybe he wasn’t as strict as she often heard of others. Big bosses could be dicks. Most were.

Inside it was cool and the long walls were painted white. The secretary at the info booth directed her straight to the upper floor and took the phone in her gracious long hands. The blonde woman was fully dressed up ; black blazer, black trousers and a beautiful light blue top. Jewelry that played with the light and a neat pair of Ray Ban glasses on her straight nose.

Katherine went into the elevator while she thought about it. If everyone was like the secretary , she would have a hard time fitting in. The elevator music did nothing to soothe her nerves, and Katherine wiped her sweaty palms on her skirt again. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew her feet were hurting like hell in these way too high pumps.

The elevator opened its doors slowly on the seventh floor, revealing an office with the greatest view over the small, rural village. It was empty, except for her so Katherine hesitantly walked in. The grand windows on all three sides made the sun fall in gracefully, shedding its light on the black desk. It was empty of papers, only a Mac in the middle and Katherine couldn’t help to walk to the window and look over the beautiful village.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

Katherine almost jumped up when the manly voice came from behind her. She quickly rubbed her hands on her skirt again, swiveled around on her heels and stuck out her hand quite clumsy.

“Katherine Miller, sir,” she said and only then realised the CEO sat behind his desk, face hidden behind his iMac.

“I know,” the young man replied and Katherine could see the dark blond hair neatly styled. “Please sit down. I just needed to check my mails.”

“Oh,” she murmured and did what he asked. “I can come back another time, if that’s more suitable.”

A chuckle came from behind the iMac and Katherine couldn’t help to smile.

“Nervous, Miss Miller?”

“Yes,” she admitted.

“Don’t be,” the young man spoke and moved his chair a bit while he turned off the computer. “You already have the job. I just like to know who works for me.”

“That’s…,” and her breath got stuck in her throat when the CEO finally turned his face so that he could face her.

She wanted to scream. Wanted to run. But she was frozen in place when the blue eyes of Robert looked straight at her. The hair, the eyes, the face, the long fingers,...everything was the same.

Katherine felt her blood drain from her face, gripped the chair so hard her knuckles turned white. The man before her stared at her and stood up to sit on the desk next to her.

“Are you okay, my dear? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

The voice was different. The way he looked down at her was different. He just looked the same, but Katherine felt that the man before her wasn’t Robert Gray. The young man smiled sincere at her, revealing his perfect white teeth. He must think she was about to pass out because he gave her a glass of water.

“I’m Roman Godfrey,” he said when she took a large gulp from her water. “Welcome to the White Tower and Hemlock Grove. I’m sure you will like it here.”

(That’s it! The end. Please let me know if you liked it. Xoxo Aysline)