Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

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LOCATION: 

YE RAN HIGH CHAIRMAN'S OFFICEq

It's break time at Ye Ran High but Raizel's not eating ramen. What's he eating instead? you might ask. Well it's his 2nd fave meal of course! If you haven't caught on already...it's ass. He's eating ass. 

Franky: master!!!! 

Rai: *is too busy doing other things with his mouth to respond* (*^﹏^*)

Franky: *increasingly obscene noises* maaaaaster yes right there daddy hooo 

Rai: did you just call me daddy?

Franky: y-yes..?

Rai: do it again

*they move onto actually fucking* 

*use your imagination ;)* 

Shinwoo: *walking by* hey guys do you hear that? 

Ikhan: hear what

Shinwoo: I heard somethin

Suyi: sounds like two guys fucking

Shinwoo: SUYI WHAT THE FUCK

Suyi: what??? that's what it sounds like! 

Shinwoo: how do you know what that sounds like?? 

Suyi: (ಥ﹏ಥ) 

Yuna: suyi???

Suyi: its ok guys im fine 👍

*no further explanation is provided. the kids dont investigate they just fuck right off and go play computer games* 

Shinwoo: no wait we can't go yet where's rai? 

Yuna: dude it's still school break, school hasn't ended yet can't you read the tags

Shinwoo: ??? 

Ikhan: yes shinwoo can't you read

Shinwoo: YOU SHUT UP MANABU

Ikhan: what did you just call me???!

Shinwoo: ha ha "manabu" (´థ౪థ)σ 

Manabu: what the fuck??? you just changed my name in the story! 

Unidentified Female Character #2: guys, I don't feel so good…

Unidentified Female Character #1: what's happening…

Yu-chan: huh? Manabu you hear somethin? 

Manabu: I can hear two guys fucking…

Unidentified Female Character #1: you can't see us?!! 

Manabu: * listens at the door * yes someone is definitely doing the deed in there

Unidentified Character #2: we're your friends! Suyi and Yuna! 

Yu-chan: huh, weird. I swear I can hear something else. 

Manabu: don't try to scare me!! I:m not afraid of ghosts ಠ╭╮ಠ 

*Yu-chan and Manabu fuck off to go play games* 

Meanwhile Frankenstein is filled with Raizel's holy dick seed that can make anyone without a uterus pregnant because this is that kind of fic

LOCATION: 

THE LORD'S THRONE ROOM, LUKEDONIA 

Raskreia is sitting on her throne playing Animal Crossing. The other clan leaders are hanging around doing jack shit because it seems like they're jobless enough to have the free time to hang around in the throne room 24/7. Suddenly Raskreia gets an unexpected mental image. 

Raskreia: !!!!!! 

Karias: noona what happened?? 

Raskreia: *looking shaken* i just saw...that human...ass naked…

Rajak: wut?

Raskreia: *stand up abruptly* THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE 

Urokai: UNACCEPTABLE!!!! 

Raskreia: who the fuck invited you

*it doesn't matter, he's conveniently gone the next instant*

Raskreia: anyway it looks like Raizel is CHEATING ON ME

Raskreia: that bitch ass slut ass whore!!1

Gejutel: my lord you can't call the noblesse a bitch ass slut ass whore!!1

Raskreia: everyone get outta my sight -_-

Raskreia: except kei ru 

Raskreia: I need him for...reasons

*everyone files out of the room. rael tries to leave his pet bunny Nibbles behind to spy on them but then he realizes Nibbles is only capable of saying the word fuck* 

(A/N: rael is a dumbass, the authors of this fic love him)

Raskreia: let's fuck

Kei Ru: AW YEAH! SWEET

*Cue Ominous Music* 

Raskreia: *darkly* lets make a sex tape and send it to raizel 

Raizel and Franky are done fucking. 

Raizel's phone beeps. 

Raizel: look it's a text from my girlfriend 

Franky: GIRLFRIEND?

Raizel: oops

Raizel: oh neat, pics of kei ru's dick!

Franky: how...how do you know whos dick it is……..

Raizel: *reverts to canon mode* 

Raizel: …..

Tao, who was watching them this entire time: top 10 anime betrayals

Frankyyyy: r u,,,, CHEATING on me??????! *cries*

Raizel: babe I’m a man, I have needs. One person can’t satisfy me.

Raizel: I only loved you like 49% anyway. 

Franky: *cries* u can’t do this to me I thought you loved me,,,,

Raizel: I do love you, only 49%. I love Raskreia 51%. Byeeeeeee slut keep on smacking that ass

*raizel flies off to play video games and eat ramen xDDDDDD*

LOCATION:

SOMEWHERE IN SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA. Jkkkkkk tokyooooooo beachhhhh XD KONNICHIWAAAA RAI KUN

*rai lands in front of the arcade. It is late. He has been lost for five hours. The children have gone home.* 

Rai: damn,,, where my bitches at

Rai: Time to find some pussy 

*rai flies off to find some pussy*

*rai flies over the city looking for some pussy. His pussy senses are tingling, so he stops at a burger place. M21 is there, eating his food off the floor. At the next table he sees what pinged his pussy senses: a woman with a wolf tail. Yes good, he thinks, time to get some wolf ass.*

Rai: hey sexy,,, I’m gonna fuck u so hard you’ll howl at the moon 

Wolf Girl: what are you some kind of nerd cosplaying as a vampire? I only fuck other WOLVES back off bub

Rai: *growns a tail* how about now?

*wolf girl launches onto Rai and shreds their clothes. They fuck on the table in the restaurant. The owner yells at them to get out but they don’t listen. M21 is passed out in a food coma on the floor.* a/n: I wish Rai would fuck me ;(((((( hes so smexy rawr XD

Wolf Girl: impergante me with ur wolf sperm Rai kun!!!!!11

Rai: call me sexy pls

Wolf Girl: sexy kun,,,,, suki desu yooooooo

Rai: *slaps her* you’re a wolf talk right 

Wolf Girl: ooh yeah hit me harder ;;)

*sexy noises*

Rai: ooh ahhh ahhhh 

Wolf Girl: heeeheeee heeeeeeeee 

*as he spills his magic seed into wolf girl rai howls at the moon. Somewhere in Seoul tokyo franky cries and calls up at the moon (A/N: get it??? Moon?? Lunark?? XD)*

°○°°○°

A/N: ~~end of chaptah one review plz!!!!111 no flames!!!!~~ ~~if we don’t get 5 reviews we won’t post the new chaptah!!~~

Chapter Text

LOCATION:

A NUDIST BEACH 

The trio are sitting around a beach mat on the beach. Its a nudist beach so everyone is naked. all the characters are here. naked. 

M-21: hnnnnnghhhhh

Takeo: hey whats gotten into him

M-21: nsnndidnfnfnnnnghhhhhhh

M21: *growling noises* arroo arroo arrroo ha hahahaha

Takeo: why are you laughing?

Tao: hes not laughing he's panting!!! The forced reproduction of dogs is not a joke takeo!!! >: ((((

Takeo: so he's in heat??

Tao: …

Takeo: …

Tao: hey u want some help

M-21: im not in heat fuck u tao!!!! 

Tao: wrong, you mean fuck me Tao (•́ ₃ •̀)

*they start going at it on the beach. Takeo who the authors usually ignore for plot convenience is not a part of it. he just watches them slurping his juice.* 

Takeo: *sighhh* if I wasn't such a background character maybe I would get laid too :'( 

Previous Lord: *suddenly showing up out of nowhere* oooh 2 hot sexy men can I join in

M-21: oh fuck he's totally my type

Takeo: *sobbing* what about meee

PL: huh? Who said that? 

Tao: orgy train!!!!

PL: SWEET I'm in

Takeo: *still sobbing because he's being completely left out* 

Meanwhile Rai and Wolf Girl arrive at the beach because rai wanted to fuck in the water and wolf girl wanted to spy on M21

*rai is flexing his pectorals while wolf girl is watching the orgy that has overtaken m21* a/n: wow hot 😳 I wish I was there 😛

Wolf Girl: sexy kun let’s make whoopee 😳

Rai: ill make u whoop heee heeeee 🤩

Wolf Girl: what the fuck

Wolf Girl: just put your dick in me already >:(

*rai puts dick inside her velvet cavern of love. As he does he lets out another HEEE HEEEEE!*

Wolf Girl: wow you are so unattractive to me right now

Rai: dont hate me cuz u ain't me playah 

Wolf Girl: start thrusting already i want him to see me

Rai: but did YOU ever see ME????!

*m 21's head peeks out of the pile. He is assaulted by many dicks.*

Wolf Girl: oh YEAH SEXY KUN!!!!!@$ Ahhh DONT STOP ;;;;)

Rai: smack my ass and call me mommy

Wolf Girl: SUCK MY BREASTS SEXY KUN IM A HOT MILKY MOMMA :3

Rai: ooh Ahhh hahahaha heee heee 

Wolf Girl: 😛😛😜😝🤤

Wolf Girl: ahhh sexy kun dont lick me there!! You're a bad boyyyyy ;)

Jellyfish: bada bing ba da boom *sting*

Wolf Girl: 🤡🤡🤡🤡

*meanwhile on the beach*

Previous Lord is sucking M21's wolf dick 😛😳 it has a spike on the end like a wolf does because you know hes a wolf 🐺😜

Tao: breathe breathe okay okay okay push on three one two ---

M21: tao if you dont shut up dick isnt the only thing you'll be eating 

Tao: ooh feisty. I like it when you're angry its sexyyyy ;) 

Takeo: WHAT ABOUT ME??? IM NOT SEXY???

Tao: hey did you hear something?

Takeo: STOP IGNORING ME TAO.YOURE RIGHT NEXT TO ME

Tao: I swear I heard someone, maybe all this BIG DICK ENERGY is making me craaaaazy lmaoooo

PL: *smacks his lips as the wolf cock falls out* now now boys everyone will get a turn. I've enlisted help, gejutel come (XDDD) out please!

*gejutel appears like poof* a/n: whoa crazy vampire powers 😳

Gejutel: you called...lord?

Pl: yes we need some hot old man dick energy here. Please give them some. Who here has a daddy kink!!!!!

Tao: OOOH ME ME !!!!! I DO!!@

Takeo: stop making this about you I'm the one with a daddy kink!!!!

Tao: what a noisy mosquito! I'm trying to get fucked by a dilf here shut up 

Takeo: lISTEN U LITTLE BITCh,,,,,, U WANNA FITE ME????

Tao: BRING IT ON SMALL DICK!!!! 

Takeo: PLANE GIRL NEVER LIKED YOU ANYWAY (a/n plane girl is an oc go read my other fic lmao xddddd self promotion😎)

Tao: *gasps* TAKE THAT BACK!!!!!

Takeo: mAkE mE sLuT°°•`1111•!@!!

*they greek wrestle ;;;;) a/n: omg so hot,,,, I wish I was there,,,,,, takeo is such a hottie 🤤*

*urokai puffs in, wait who urokai??? I thought his name was hottie nobody 😝😝😝*

Urogai: IS EVERYONE HAVING SEX

 EXCEPT ME??????

Urogay: WHY DOES NO ONE WANT TO FUCK ME?????? AM I NOT HOT ENO8GH?????? YOU ARE A BUNCH OF TWO FACED LOSERS WITH REALLY BAD FASHION TASTES AND I HOPE YOU GET SAND IN YOUR PEEPEE HOLE!!!

PL: now now Uruguay everyone will get a turn dont be angry 

Uruguay?: MY NAME IS UROKAI!!!!! YOU DONT EVEN KNOW MY NAME YOU OLD HAG?????

PL: lol whatever okay boomer 

Urokay: IS THAT SIR RAIZEL?????? IS SIR RAIZEL FUCKING SOMEONE?????? WHO IS THIS BITCH????? HEY YOU TWO BIT HUSSY COME THE FUCK OVER HERE SO I CAN BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU

Tao: ueuwuwuwu raizel cum daddy o pls fuck meeeee uwuwuwuw

Yrokay: YOU SHUT THE FUXK UP

*zahra (???) pops in a/n: lol who's zahra??? I only know franky 🤤🤤🤤🤤*

Zara: wow good comeback urokay 

Urokay: MY NAME IS UROKAI!!!! 

Zara: lol ok boomer 

Urokay: *explodes out of anger* 🤯🤯🤯

Takeo: ew my mouth was open

((A/N:get it? Explodes??? Haha))

Zarga: oh well. What a shame who wants to fuxk 😜 big daddy's here 

Gejutel: I believe that I am what is called a "zaddy". You have been a very bad boy zarga. I must punish you 

Zarga: 😳😳😳😳

Gejutel:😈 mmmmm yes 

*on a lonely cliff franky stands nude, clothes ripped off and screaming at the moon. Neighbors call the police. He is the police bitchhhhh a/n: omgggg frankie is so hot 😳 punish me daddy 😳*

Frankyyyy: *drawing a pentagram with blood* spirits of the other world,hear my prayer, make the one with big titties finally appear 

*frankyy hires 21 (get it 21????? xD) security guards to pee on the circle. They are being paid $27 dollars an hour*

Franky: now the circle is sealed, here is the word that will make her real…..kame….hame….HA!!!!!!!1 

*poof*

*LARGE SMOKE APPEARS*

IS IT THE WOMAN OF FRANKYS DREAMS???? WAR CRIMINAL LUNARK WHO IS AS BORING AS DRY PAINT???? 

Franky: no ,,,, it cannot be,,,,

??: hey what's up guys my name is goku! Wow this is pretty crazy huh but now that I'm here I'm dtf! My wife doesnt need to know ;;)

*Franky collapses to the ground in anguish*

Franky: god DAMMIT (ooh he said a bad word 😳😳) WHEN WILL I GET THE ANIME GIRLFRIEND OF MY DREAMS????

*Goku and the 21 guards are having sex in the background (ewwwww that's gross 😳😳😳😳 my virgin eyes are scarred for life 😳😳😳😳😳 stoppppppppp guysssssss)

A/n: okay guys thats chap 2!!!!111 what do you think???? Isnt Rai a hottie 🤤🤤 hes my husband back off bitch!!!!11111 okay reviews plzzzzzz!!!! No flames >>>>: (((((( or I'll feed you to dark Spear 😳

Ps. RaiRakseria (sp?) 4ever!!!1111 😜😜😜😜😜

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

LOCATION: 

THE NUDE BEACH

The orgy that the trio are having with previous lord, Uruguay, zarga and gejutel has become a summer event with 50+ people. 

here's what everyone's doing😂😉😎😎

Zaddy Gejutel: teaching 5 guys in fursuits how to suck dick😱😱😏

PL : getting his dick sucked by 5 guys in fursuits👏👏

Urogay: watching rai and wolf girl fuck from a small fishing boat in da water they don't even notice (a/n: urokai stop being a creep!!!😡😡 perv alert!!!) 

Tao: eating watermelon off m21's back🤤🤤🍉

Takeo: milking 3 pairs of tiddies as da communist theme plays in the background 😆😮🙏 

hmm I feel like were forgetting someone but idc...whatever biaaaaatchhhh😎😎 

♡○☆♧▪▪■□○°○□■●○●

Frankyyy: (a/n OMG FINALLY!) this time it has to work,tiddy dragon, grant my wish

Shenron: what did you call me

Goku: grant his wish!!!!!! he gave me 21 guys to fuck

Shenron: goku …you have changed …

Franky: STOP TALKING ABOUT OTHER FANDOMS!!!! THIS IS A NOBLESSE FIC!!!! ILL FEED U TO MY CRAZY LOVER/!!!!😡😈😈

Shenron: fine, I will grant you 1 wish,usually its 3 but u called me tiddy dragon

*smoke appears there is a piss shower and finally the one with the tiddies of Franky's dreams,, appears!* 

Lunark: what am going here??? I was in the middle of having my dick sucked😡😡😡

Franky: she has a dick???? 

Lunark: ooh you've been a bad boy😈😈 I'm gonna peg you so hard😈 

Franky: hoooo😳😳😳😳 fuck me Big Mommy!!!!!!

Goku: oooo can I join

Franky: fUCK NO YOU SMELL LIKE PISS

Lunark: you're not into piss??? I'm out bye sis💅

Franky: nononono I'll do whatever you want pls I need your tiddies

Lunarl: then😈😈😈 lets begin u sexy sexy bad boy😈😈😈😈

Franky: (⊙o⊙)

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LOCATION: *still at beach orgy*

*Rai has refused to pee on Wolf Girl’s jellyfish sting, so she angrily hops out of the water*

Wolf Girl: *hops to m21 under the pile of dicks* ahjusshi senpai ,,, please pee on me? 

M21: ??? *cant talk because of dicks*

Wolf Girl: 🤩🤩😜😜😜😜😉😉

M21: *spits out dick* what, you think I’m a dog??? I just pee on anything that smells????? You think I don’t have standards??? IM NOT A DOG IM A WOLF

Wolf Girl: I’m a wolf too now quit complaining and piss on my leg 

M21: all right I’ll piss on you but it won’t be your leg 

Wolf Girl: who the hell will piss on my leg???

Random Guy #16: I will 😁😁

Wolf Girl: eww you’re gross get away from me 

Random Guy #16: hey listen here lady my pee is magical, I can guarantee you results. I summoned the Titty Dragon for a client yesterday you know

Wolf Girl: whatever i only want wolf pee 

Wolf Girl: hey,,,, 😉😉😉 it’s mating season 😉😉😉 wanna make some wolf babies?? 😜😜😝😳😳

Tao: you have to be a wolf to make wolf babies 😏

Wolf Girl: LiSTEN hERE BOWL HEAD

Tao: at least I’m not wearing a tail and howling at the moon while I’m getting reamed by some guy named jihoon jasper takeshi and role playing some weird furry fetish 

Wolf Girl: whoaaaa hold up did he just call me a whore??? 

Tao: no I called you a furry whore 

Wolf Girl: I will NOT sit here and be disrespected like this good NIGHT bitch ass slut ass whore 

Tao: ITS THE AFTERNOON

*wolf girl goes back to rai*

Wolf Girl: okay fire it up again sexy 

Rai: i don’t do that anymore, I am a man of god now 

Wolf Girl: ??? What??

Rai: while you were gone asking people to pee on you Jesus came to me from the heavens and he made me see the error of my ways 

Wolf Girl: Jesus?? We live in Japan!

Rai: god is everywhere my child 

Wolf Girl: okay you know what I like a good old catholic school girl kink like anyone else but this is too much im out 

*wolf girl poofs out*

*Jesús appears*

Rai: hi babe 😘😘

Jesús: ;;) 😍🥰 

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Chapter Text

LOCATION: the cliff where franky piss summoned titty dragon 😛😛😛

Lubark: drop ur pants and call me momma 

Frankey: daddy

Lunark: wrong. *whips frankeys pants off*

Frankey: ooohhh hahahahahahehehe 

*lunark undoes her pants, her big cock pops out*

Frankey: ooh 😳

Lunark: bark bark bark woof 

Frankey: ?? Meow?

Lunark: bad kitty. Gotta punish u now 😤

Lunark: turn around 😈

*lunarks tail goes smack smack against the ground* 

Mmmm yess 😈😈

*lunark puts a condom on her tail because safe sex is important*

*she uses a magic spell from titty dragon to lube up her monkey tail dick*

Lunark: pucker up handsome ;;) 

Franken: 😲

~~~~

LOCATION: church in Seoul. Rai is wearing a replica of Madonna’s wedding dress in Like a Virgin. It’s ripped and showing cleavage. He has red lipstick smeared around his mouth. Like a Prayer is playing in the background. 

Rai: 🎶 life is a myssssteeeeeryyyy⁉️⁉️everyone must staaaaaand alone 😭I hear you call my name😱~~~~ and it feels like~~~ Home : )🤗🎶

Black Jesus: *is black* 

Rai: ❌🛑 stop u r not allowed to be This Hot

Black Jesus: when u call my name 🤩it’s like a little prayer 🙏I’m down on my knees😳 I want you to take me there 🥵🥵🥵

Rai: babe. It’s I WANNA TAKE YOU THERE. 

Black Jesus: but I do want you to take me there 

Rai: I’m sorry I don’t do that anymore. I only have sex with Jesus 😇

Black Jesus: and what am I chopped liver 

Rai: no? You’re black Jesus?? What kind of question —

Black Jesus: whatever let’s get on with it 😒

Rai: just like a prayer you know I’ll take you there. ;)

Black Jesus: it’s like a dream 💤

Rai: oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah 

Black Jesus: you are not what you seem…..you sexy demon, be gone succubus‼️‼️ *throws holy water in rai*

Rai: ….I’m wet….for your cock ;)

Black Jesus: >: ( that’s not how this works you lazy slut you fuck me

Rai: ugh fine Jesus Christ you are so demanding 

Black Jesus: my name is Jesus Carlos Sebastian Sandiego Christ don’t forget it🚫

Rai: Come here and stab me with this cross :) I’ll bleed all over my dick so I can fuck you 

Black Jesus: whip me like the 14th century flagellants in the Roman Catholic Church

*rai backslaps him*

Rai: shut up how dare you use your dirty mouth to defile his name 

Black Jesus: I’m gonna shove that cross up my own ass if you don’t hurry it up 

*rai blesses his cock. A choir appears and starts singing the backing track to Like a Prayer* 

Black Jesus: yeahhhhh now we’re talking!!!! Who wants to fuck me next??

Rai: we must fuck the sin out of him. This is a very crafty demon, and ordinary measures will not work 

Rai: everyone take a number so I can bless your cocks and vaginas 

*rai blesses cocks and vaginas while he fucks black Jesus with the bloody cross*

*in the background a statue of Jesus cries. If only it wasn’t stone : ( a/n pls Jesus don’t kill me 😳😳

Chapter Text

In a forgotten tomb in the middle of a forest, a young girl woke up. But she wasn’t a young girl, she was thousands of years old. She had long black hair with streaks of magenta and her eyeshadow was powder blue. She had brown contacts in to hide her red eyes. (yes she sleeps in contacts okay she’s a vampire she doesn’t need eyes!!!!!!!11 get off my back prepz) 

Gorl: *sigh*. It’s not Gofik enoff : ( 

Gyro: *screams* I die and no one buries me in a abandoned graveyard???? R U D E!!!!!1

Astra Zeneca: *climbs out of the grave* *it wasn’t even a grave tho just a hole she dug in the ground and rolled into* *she was wearing a ripped skater skirt from Hot Topic, fishnet stockings, combat boots, and a neon orange tube top* a/n: wow that’s so hot 😳😳😳😳 slay me queen 

Astra Zeneca: omg where has my brother gone!!!!!1111

Astra Zeneca: I have to find him!!! It’s time for whopee!!!!1

*flies off in the wrong direction*

Astra Zeneca: Reijel!!!! I have 2 find u!!!!!11

~~~~~~~~~~

LOCATION: CHURCH IN SEOUL

*raizel is still blessing cocks and vaginas*

Raizel: brothers and sistas,,,, let us pray upon the power of the holiest vessel of all,,,, the cock 🙏

Raizel: in Jesus’ name I suck

Choir: amen 

*its raining men starts to play*

SLAM!

Suddenly the church doors fly open. Lightning flashes as the wind blows in. A lean, petite figure stands backlit by the moonlight. 

Raizel: no...it can’t be!!!

Black Jesus:.... Jesus?

Raises: no?? Jesus is black??? What kind of question—

Astra Zeneca: Brother, I have come to find you!

Aster Zenika: raijeru! You must return home to rocky donia to suck the most cocks and regain your place as biggest slut!!!!1

Raizel: It’s my beloved long lost sister whom I love more than anything in the world!

Raizel: Whats up slut!!!!

Astra Zeneca: *looks around* oh my raijel-kun, I see you have been busy

Raizel: Dont call me that sis its embarrassing!!!1 IM NOT 150 ANYMORE!!!

Astra Zeneca: Whatevs, slut. Where’s that hot sexy boyfriend of yours i banged in that graveyard last time?

Raizel; you...banged...my Franky??? *cries* How could you do this to me!!!! Do you even love me???

Astra Zeneca: *sigh* Raijel-kun please don’t start. What’s yours is mine etc etc so dont be a brat

Raizel: I HATE THIS FUCKING FAMILY

Astra Zeneca: oh what happened to our evil big brother after we fought him? (astra zeneca went into her long sleep after she defeated their evil big brother single-handedly with her soul weapon Astoria)

Raizel: are u sure he’s the evil one when you banged my boyfriedn!!!!

Astra Zeneca: Should I tell him….? 

Astra Zeneca: anyway where is the food? I’m HUNGRY lol lmao I love food ;)))

LOCATION: A JAPANESE TACO BELL

(a/n: omg we are so hungry...we r sluts 4 food lmaooooo)

The Trio, PL, Gejutel and Wolf Girl are lying on the floor of Taco Bell drunk. Staring at the ceiling contemplating their lives and wondering at the meaning of existence. 

Tao: Hey guys...what is the meaning of life?

PL: all we do...is wake up, eat, do drugs and have sex….is that really living?

M-21: You and i live very different lives

Wolf Girl: m21 *clinging to him* make me ur sexy wolf gf?

M-21: Takeo is my sexy wolf gf

Takeo: WOOF WOOF BARK

Wolf Girl: what the fuck!!! Raizel lied t o me!!!!

Gejutel: You can be my sexy wolf gf ;)

Wolf Girl: ew no you don’t even shop at hottopic

Tao: I shop at hottopic

Wolf Girl: OMG YAS 

Karias walks into Taco Bell

Karias: hey babe!!!1

Tao: *springs to his feet* BABE!!!

*they start making out*

Wolf Girl: SCREEEEEEECHHH!!!!!!!!

Tao: babe...lets go to the back ;)

Karias: *gropes his ass*

Tao: omg babe!!! not in public!!!

Karias: heheheheuheu

M-21: *is barfing*

Wolf Girl: omg barf on me with your sexy wolf semen!!!!1

M-21: *barfs on her*

Tao: ewww babe lets get out of here and leave these weirdos

Karias: How do you want me fuck you love? :O

Tao: fuck me like the slutty omega bitch that I am 

Karias: GOD BABE IM SO HORNY RN

*Karias carries Tao out of the Taco Bell bridal-style* a/n: omg sah jealous!!

LOCATION: LUKEDONIA, RASKREIA’S THRONE ROOM

The Clan Leaders are gathered in the throne room wearing black hoods like a cult (omg goth aesthetic) , bowing before the badass KWEEN Raskreia.

Raskreia: My loyal servants...today, Lukedonia goes to war!!!!

Everyone: ROAAAAAAARRR

Rael: *whispers* wait i wasnt paying attention why are we going to war

Regis: *whispers* god u fukcing middleschooler, you dont even know that? Astra zeneca, enemy of the Noble race, has returned.

Raskreia: ASTRA ZENECA, THAT BITCH ASS SLUT ASS WHORE, ENEMY OF THE NOBLE RACE, HAS RETURNED!

Everyone: ROOOAOOAAARRRR

Raskreia: *sinister smirk* I’m coming for your guts, bitch. Prepare yourself...

Dun dun duuuuun

Chapter Text

LOCATION: A DARK GOTHIC CHURCH IN THE MIDDLE OF A GRAVEYARD, SURROUNDED BY MOONLIGHT

A pale, petite girl who looks like a seventeen year old highschooler walks out of the church. But she is actually thousands of years old. She has short dark blue hair with stylish bangs that cover one of her sapphire-coloured ocean-blue eyes. She also has a scar on her face that somehow only adds to her ethereal beauty. She’s wearing a simple black sleeveless top that highlights her dragon tattoo, fishnet stockings, black combat boots from Hottopic, and a choker with a cross pendant and one studded gypsy earring. 

Gorl: How long was I asleep? It feels like yesterday that I fought Satan himself and won...wah,,,Im so hungry,,,

Footsteps approach the girl. (Omg watch out!!!!!!its a rapist 😱😱)

Girl: No!! It can’t be!!!

Astra Zeneca: SUPAH SLUT!!!! HOWZ MA MAIN HOE??

Girl: *bows on one knee* my Lord I live to serve you faithfully as your loyal assassin handmaiden!

Astra Zeneca: Yaas slay gorl😍  Nova Vax, meet my brother Kadis etrama di raijeru

RaiJERU: *grumbles* what, did she sleep with my Franky too???

Nova Vax: As if I would sleep with him! I’m a strong independent woman who needs no man so you and your “franky” can go fuck off!!

Astra Zeneca: your standards are still high as ever i see!!! Come on slut we got work to do

Nova Vax: You want me to work with a dumb goth boy? Men are stupid they are the worst!

Astra Zeneca: I know girl but we need this one unfortunately

Raizel: *is off doing dumb boy things*

Nova Vax: Ugh, men…

~~~~~

LOCATION: THE FRANKY HOUSE

Everyone is gathered in the living room. 

Gejutel and PL: *smoking crack* 

Urogay: is dead LMAOOOO

Tao and Karias: *making out on the couch* 

Regis: *listening to Fall Out Boy on his airpods* 

Rael: *fighting people on social justice twitter*

M-21: BARK BARK WOOF 

Takeo: *eating the furniture* 

Idk i cant keep track of everyone

Franky: Why are you all in my house???? ANSWER ME OR I’LL FEED U TO MY CRAZY LOVER

Raskreia: we came to earth because the enemy of the noble race, astra zeneca, has returned

Franky: so?? Thats none of my business??

Rasreia: THIS CONCERNS UR PRECIOUS MASTER, U FUCK

Franky: MASTER LEFT ME FOR BLACK JESUS???? FUCK YOU JESUS IVE ALWAUS BEEN AN ATHIEST I SPIT ON UR GRAVE

PL:  jesus is black? 

Rael: of course he’s black???! What you think he’s white????? You think every1ne is white don’t u????

PL; huh

Rael: How dare you force your religion on peopel!!!! What about the non-Christians?? And “black jesus” implies that he’s NOT black and hes SPECIAL just because hes black thats degrading to the black community!!! JESUS IS BLACK, SO WHAT. ISTEAD OF SAYING BALCK JESUS WE SHOULD BE REPLACING ALL THE PICTURES OF WHITE JESUS WITH THE REAL JESUS! #WhiteJesusIsCancelled #Activism #BlackDontCrack #1like1follow #whitepeopleconspiracy #blm

Tao: Oooh whats your twitter handle follow4follow

Rheql: @social.equality.assassin.22

Lunar: but milky momma is here why do you want raijel back?? *gasp* You cheating HOE , DO U THINK OF HIM WHEN IM FUCKING YOU????

Tao: wait i thought milky momma was lagus

Franky: uh yeah? duh lol

Lunark: *wails* I THOUGHT WE WERE IN LOVE!!!111

Franky: i summoned u with a piss shower and tiddy dragon for the price of letting goku fuck my low-income workers??

Lunaku: PEOPLE HAVE MET IN WORSE CONDITIONS!!!! OMG HAVENT U SEEN 90 DAY FIANCÉ 

Franky: i only loved u like 49% don’t think too highly of urself 

Taekwondo: *stops chewing the chair leg* thats true, i met Rajak at a furry themed ecstasy party

Franky: you think thats worse?

Regis: rajak??

Takeo: uhh yes im fucking rajak now, got a problem with dat??

Tap: ooh whos top

Rajak: i’m a sub bitch bottom 

Tao: *gasp* JUST LIKE ME!!!111

M-21: bark bark growl

Karius: *slaps tao's ass*

Uroagy: what the fuck i’m still aive??

Franky: *dark spears him* not anymore

Kei Ru: Hey did you know I fucked raskreia

Raskreia: yes only for the cameras until i get my boyfriend back, fuck off

Franky: HEY HE’S MY BOYFRIEND 

snaku: *darkly* we’ll see about that, honey…

Lotus: Do I have any lines??

Rozaria: I think you only speak when I speak

Rosario: wait who r u 

Ludis: crap deal but ok :(

Takeyo: u guys wanna join us? We fuck on thursdays

Rozaria: will that give us more plot relevancy??

Takeo: no

Rael: when da hellz did u slutz get here!!!!

Tao: omg Rael u can’t just call someone a slut!!!

Rael: shit up slut I can say whatever I want u trying to censor me???? Huh???? You trying to be a censoring Nazi loser????

Tao: ???? What???

Rasreia: Listen up slutz. The future of the noble race is at steak. We have to work together and combine all our powers if we are to stand any chance of defeating Aster Sexeka, enemy of the Noble race, and her faithful assassin handmaiden aka the Goddess of Destruction Nova Vax.

M21: steak??? Where??? 

Kei Ru: Hot. 

Raskreia: ew stop being such a sleazeball

Kei Ru: Your the one who asked for revenge sex??

Seira: my lord how can we defeat a Goddess of Destruction?

Raskreia: mwhahahaha see that’s where my brains come in because unlike that bitch ass slut ass whore, I have both beauty and brains wouldnt you say? Mwhahahaha

Franky: don't tell me she has horcruxes that would be the lamest plot device ever

Regis: whats a horse cock?

Karias: not horse cock, regis…

Tao: *giggles* horse cock

Karias: awww my hubby is soooo cute

M-21: rrrrfuhhhff

Rasreia: To defeat astra zeneca and nova sex we have to split into teams and go destroy every Hottopic in the world

Tao: but i like Hot Topic…

Karias: motion rejected we will not do that

Raskreia: DO YOU REALIZE WHAT IS AT STAKE HERE?

Lunark: not really you havent told us exactly what these 2 are capable of

Raskreia: WHY WONT U TRUST ME!!! I HATE THIS FUCKING FAMILY!

Franky: but your not part of the family

Raskreia: *goes away cursing everyone. PL, gejutel, ludik, rozaria and kylo ren go with her*

~~~~~~~

LOCATION: HIDDEN UNION BASE SOMEWHERE IN OKINAWA

In a dark neon lab in the basement underground with tubes and computers and stuff (okai??? I'm not a nerd XD I dont know these things), a perfect clone of Astra Zeneca grows. 

Third Elder: Sir? The secret weapon is ready….

A/N:

CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!

Dont forget 2 like and comment!! peace!! no flamez or we block u!

happi fangzgibing slutz!!!11111 if u meet miss rona tell her she owes me a dollah >>>: (

~ author-chans

Chapter Text

LOCATION: the woods, somewhere idk I’m not good at geometry lawlZ XD

*asstra Zika and nova box are sitting in logs smoking marijuana they brought from Zika’s drug dealer*

Raijeru: why am I here??? I need to bless cocks and make sure my hot black boyfriend doesn’t cheat on me with his bbc >: ( a/n: that means big black cock omg so dirty 😳😳 were not being racist ok

Nova Vox: ur our bait duh 

Raijeru: ??? Why???

Nova Cocks: stop asking questions and blow 

Raizel: uhh I would be rn if you guys hadn’t kidnapped me!!!!!11

Astra Zeneca: 🙄🙄🙄 baby brothers are the WORST

Raizel: I’m older then you?

Aster: by a second,,,,

Raizel: wow surprised you can count that high

AstraZeneca: I learned how to read!!!!

Nova Vox: wait u guys learned how to rea?D 😳😳

Astra Zeneca: we’re gonna. We’re gonna plan. How to overflow the throne and take over the life of that poser bish Raser

Raizel: Raskreia

Astra Zeneca: gesundheit. Im gonna. Braid my hair and wear that dumb outfit all you loserz wear and then. No one can tell 

Nova Vox: whoaaaa THATS crazy i knew ur the boss for a reason,,, you have da biggest brain slay gurl

Astra Zeneca: u know what comes with a big brain right ;;;)

Nova Vox: crushing mental illness and an inferiority complex?

Astra Zeneca: huh no? A big dick 

Nova Vox: ohhhhh master pls whip me😳

Astra Zeneca: ???

Nova Vox: sorry. Got carried away. Pls enslave me my lord 

Raisel: *sobs* my franky used to say dat😭

Astra Zeneca: that’s better : ) do u want to be my dog and sleep on the end of my bed and let me feed u table scraps at dinner? ; )

Nova Vox: woof woof bark 

Raizel: *disintegrates into the earth to find black Jesus : (*

——————————

Location: Chuck E. Cheese 

Raskreia: okay. We need a game plan

Lotus: oh can we play the games after this??

Rosario: I want to play skeeball…

Raskreia: no. Focus. 

Rael: focus is a fun game 

Regis: no that’s called concentration 

Rael: I know what it means I’m not stupid!!!!!!11 GOD

Kei Ru: SHUT UP *bangs his fists on the table, breaking it in half*

Manager: sir if this behavior continues I will have to ask you to leave 

Kei Ru: u don’t tell me what to do, only the lord tells me what 2 do 

Raskreia: every1 shit up I can’t think!!!!11

Rael: wow you can think?? 😳

Lotis: hey I’m still here

Rosario: who?? are you???

Ludis: LUDIS

Rosario: that sounds like a disease?

Ludis: >: ( u wanna go u two faced hussy 

Rosaria: no sorry I don’t fight children 

Rosaria: isn’t ur your bedtime little boy

Kei Ru: THE LORD SAID SHIT UP!!!

*punches ludis through the glass window*

Manager: okay that’s enough I’m calling police 911

Kei Ru: u shit up too!!!2 *also punches him through the window*

Rael: ACAB FUX THE PIGS IN BLUE!!!1 #acab #antifa #spitinacopsface 

Regis: Rael shut up 

Rawr: you’re trying to censor and demean me and my right to free speech!!! What are u gonna do next, set up re education camps???? fascist pig u make me sick 

Regis: ??

Raskreia: I SAID SHIT UP *punches Rael in the face* 

Regis: lord. Why don’t we steak her in the heart

Raskreia: what kind of steak?

Kei Ru: hanwoo beef lord 

Raskreia: I mean that’s really expensive do u think I’m made of money 

Regis and Rosaria: yus

Raskreia: oh right *melts bc she paper : (*

KeiRu: nooooo!!!!!111 lord!!!1111 i can glue u together!!!!

*raskreua reforms bc the power of keiru’s love and tears* a/n whaaaaaa so romantic uwu 🥺🥺🥺 raskru 4ever :((((

———-

LOCATION: THE UN HEADQUARTERS, GENEVA, GERMANY

Some peeps in white robes coem intop the room with a huge tube that has bubbles and a floating Astra seneca clone inside. The clone looks like Astra, with pale moonlight skin and long eyelashes and raven black hair with natural magenta streaks and a petite slim fra]me. Third elder walks in fornt and bows b4 every1

3rd elder: god evening eveyrnoe, we are the union and we propose this clone for the world domination plan.

The UN: OOOOOOOOHHHH

Thrid elder: she is the clone of asta zeneca conquwerore of world’s and enemy of the noble race

The UN: AAAAAAAAHHHH

Third ElderL: with this clone we will have UNLIMITED POWER!!!!!!

Palpatine: UNLIMITED POWER!!!!!

3rd elder: who dafuq invited u get out

Ban Kee Moon: how do we know we can trust thos clone??

Third: idk bitch, thats up 2 u. pay up.

*Ban Kee Moon gives him the money*

3rd: oh sweet now we can get married in vegas

Fisrt elder: FUCK YES

Location: Franky house

Frankyyy: my master,,,, has been kidnapped!!!11 i must rescue him from dat bitch astra Zeneca!!11 >: (

M21: isn’t he like cheating on you with everyone rn?

Franky: it’s because he loves me too much okaY

Franky: master!!!!! *Jumps through the window and breaks it shattering glass everywhere*

M21: aw crap 

*the full moon shines in through the window 😳 yes it’s full moon again okay I make the rules!!!!! Science sux haha haha fuk u mr zito!!!!!11*

M21: oh oh oh oh OH IM CUMMING 

*squirts jizz as he transforms into werewolf*

M21: WOOF WOOF BARK 

*goes to find some hoes to snack that pussy 😳😳 Wolf pussy 😳😳😳 he has a wolf pussy😳😳😳😳*

Chapter Text

LOCATION: A BROTHEL, FRANCE, SRI LANKA

Neon dislco lightz are pulsating and vibrating the air liked a nightclub (a/n: i havent gone to a brothel okai?? Wtf how ould i know?/ gross!!!!) and Fall out boy is playing blasted on the speakers. 

Astra ZEneca: nova sex why are we here??? This place is bad for us!!

Nova Vex: We are here to  feed on the thot energy my lord

Rai: u-u

Astra zeenca: EWWWWW I SAW A NAKED MAN1!!!!

Rai: but u?? have seen 1 before???

Nova vex: ALL MEN ARE PIGS

Astra Zeeneca: RAIJEL-KUN COVER YOUR EYEZ!!

Rai: black jesus??/ are u there??? Black jesus-kun???

Nova Vax: “BLACK” JESUS? EXCUSE ME U FLAMING RACIST!!! ITS “AFRICAN-AMERICAN” JESUS! GOD! HAVE SUM RESPECT!

Astra Zenica: nova vox how DARE YOU forget about latin jesus and korean jesus!!! I cant believe i have to cancel my own best friend! GOD. 

Nova Vax: ooooh oh yeah>?? You justsaid GOD right now well i have news for you slut GOD is not universal and i am an athetits!!! YOUR OFFENDING ME! 

Raizel: Ooo *dips his head into a bowl of white powder*  owo

Astra Zeneca: U WANNA GO??/ U WANNA GO BICTH?? 

Nova Vax: MY POWERS RIVAL YOURS MY LORD FONT FORGET THAT

Astra Zeneca: ASTORIA!!!!!

Nova Vax: MARIANA!!!!!

Astra zenec’as soul weapon is a beautiful heavy ornate sword with pure white swans on the hednel nd gold edges with red energy that obey’s astra’s every command Nova Vax’s soul weapon is not really a s=oul weapon ( like franky’s!!!! Omg we r genius take that peeps!!!!! ? ) but made from the tormented souls she stole from satan himself who are loyal 2 her and her alon. It is a beautiful staff with winges and but its pitch black like the color of a moonless night. There are magenta energy sparks on it. 

Rai: owo?? Weowowowowo (boys come from Jupiter cuz they r stupider Lolo Lolo Lolo lol XD)

Astar zika and novae vax start fighting with their soul weapons (idk im bad at writing action ok???)

Meanwhile Raskriea, ludis and kei ru are hiding behind the counter spying on them raskreia is dressed in ordinary human clothes like pink glitter eyeshdadow and a black studded leather jacket from hottopic and a neon blue tube top and fishnet stockings, purple platform sneakers six inches high and a NYC pink cap and pink lip gloss and cross earrings. Ludis is wearing a white shirt kei ru is wearing a black shirt. theyre dressed like normal humans bc their undercover to spy on astra zeneca and nova vex.

Raskreia: oh no 

KeI Rua: what is my lord???/? What botehrs you>>??

Raskrua: Astzra zeneca and nova vax are more powerful than i thought

Ludik: OH NO WHAT DO WE DO NOW1

Raskrei: I dont know their soul weapons ar far more powerful than ragnarock or any soul weapon ive evee seen!!!

Raiskeria: wait who r u again?

???: lud--

Kei ru: shit up mushroom head lord iz talking 

Kei ru: even your sul weapon my lord???

LotusL: should we just surrender then>??

Raskreia: NO WE WILL NEVER SURREBDER TO THOSE POSER BITCHES

KeI RAW: ROOOOOOOOAAAARRRRR

Raskria: *standing up* WE WILL FITGHT TO OUR LAST BREATHS!!!!!

KEI RU: RORORORORORORROROROAAAAARR

Raskreia: I WILL KILL THOSE 2 BITCH ASS SLUT ASS WHORES 1NCE AND FOR ALL!!!!!

KEI RU: RAAAAAARAARRRRRRRRRGHHHHH

Ludis: my lord everyone can see you buoth

Raskriea: fuck

Astra zika and nova vaz are too busy fighting to notice theme but Rai spots them and stops snorting cocine

Rai: RASKRIA!!!! 

Raskrea: who? What? Where? 

Rai: oh nvm i thought u were someone else :(

Kei RU: OUR LORDS DISGUISE IS BRILLAINT!!!!

Raskrea: OF COARSE I DO UGH I hate tehse GIRLY PINK CLOTHES!!!

lUDIS: My lord you look great in pink!!!1

Raskria: its still GIRLY IM NOT A FAKE PREP POZERSSSS BITCH!!!1!1!

Kei rau: LOARD UR THE GOFFFFIEST MOTHSFUCKAAAAA GRUNGE ASS BITCH ID ON POINT LAYWAS YASSS SLAY KWEEN!!!

Ludis: SLAU QUEEN!!!!

Piccolo: SLAY KQWEEN!!!

Ludik: who r u

Piccolo: im piccolo

Ludis: why

Piccolo: cuz i look like pickles duhh

Lidik: ohhh

Raskria: LUDIS *throwns barbell at him* FOCUS

Lotus: AAAARARGGGHH MY FACE :((

Raskreia: thats what u get for being a little bitch now focus

kei ru: how dare dat little bitfhhh call loard a prep!!!1!1!1 watch ur mouth u little biatch!!!!!1

Lodus: ok :((

~~~~

LOCATION: SUM HOTEL IN VEGAS IDK CALIFORNIA

1st eldeR: Omg babe its our wedding we alwuas wanted!!1`

Third elder: yes thanks 2 my cloning scheme

Fist: do u think that will like cause world problems or something

Third: idk

Dr crombel: Stop talking abou dumb shit no 1 cares about 

Thirf: nobody asked u 

drocter crumble: i’m?? Litrllay ur priest??? 

FIST: OH RYT WE’RE GETTING MARRIED~~! Father crumble pls bless our marrage

Cromble: I HATE HOMOSEXUALS!!! FUCK DA GAYS!!!

3rd: were paying u

Crumblr: O.o ok yeah u may now kiss the bride

First: hey is this wedding like official?

CRombel: idk what your talking abt

Fist: fair enugh

*they kiss HAHAHA MY SHIP SAILED,, FUCK U HATERS AND LOSERZZZ!!!! #PROUDFUJOSHI #FUJOSHIBICTH #YAOILYF #ANIME #WEEB #JAPAN #gayyaoisex #bigyaoihands

<~~~~>

a/wn DIS WAZ CHAP 9 WAT DO U TINK???!!!? LEAVE A REBIEW U BITCHES!!! STAY GOFFIK

PS: PREPZ DONT FLAME!!!!!111 DONT LAIK DONT READ OKAI

Chapter Text

CHAPTER 10

CHAP 10: nightclub its night teepee oh. o I said peepee 😳 don't tell my mom pls 😳

Astar Zenika: raijeru go give that guy a lap dance 

Raijeru: are u guys done fighting 

Astra Zeneva: it's not fighting its foreplay. Its something adults do 😈

Raizel: im.an adult

Astra zeneva: no ur not go drink ur milk 

Rau: no his milk tastes weird I'm gonna go find black jesus 

*rai ascends to heaven jk he leaves* A/N oh noooo Rai kun come back smexy 🥺🥺🥺

Astar Ze eva: BITCH U BETTER JUST BE GOING TO THE BATHROOM 

*astro zeneca and nova vox make out sloppily on the table covered in beer*

~~~

Raskreia: nows our chance

Raskreia: ludis go give them a lap dance 

Ludis: ??? What why me???

Raskreia: we're supposed to be girlfriends on a girls night out. Ur too manly looking

*kei ru rn*

  A/n omg shes so hot 😳😳😳

Kei Ru: *girly voice* omg raskreia who did ur hair it's so kewt 

Raskreua: omg hahaha thanks u know u did!!!!111

kei Ru: omg stopppppp you're making me blush :lagus ahegao: 

raskreia: omg babeeeee,,,,, I wanna do it rn,,,,, 

Kei ru: 😳😳😳😳😳🥰

Ludis: am I a joke to u

Raskreya: what was that u say something babe?

Ludis: can you at least go steak Nevada before u fuck 

Raskreua: UGH FIIIIIINEEEE let's go

*they walk over to the two lesbians 😳😳😳"

Raskreua: ludus, hand kei ru the steak 

Kei ru: *has the steak*

Kei ru: *throws steak at their faces*

kei ru: THIS IS WHAT U GET FOR BETRAYING MY BABE U HOG TIED HORE

LUDIS: *ruBs steak all over astra zeneca's chest, the blood drops down her bra and her BOOBIES POP OUT* 😳😳😳😳😳 a/n: omg my virgin eyes 😳😳😳😳😳😳

Astra Z3neva: awwww yeah rub it on me like im.a bad girl ;)))

Nova vax: *runs the blood all over her own nipples, licking her fingers and moaning*

Astra zebeca: rub my nipples ;;;)

Ludis: *rubs her nipples*

Astra zebeca: awwwwwa yeah put your thingy on me 

Ludus: *takes his thingy out and rubs it over her*

Astra zeneva: mmmmhm you're a big boy arent u 

Raskreua: okay now finish her

Kei ru: yes. Rip her head off and eat it

taskreia: babe 🥴 it makes me so wet when u talk like this 

Kei ru: omg babe staaaahp ur making me blush uwu 🤭

Ludus: *sticks his thingy in her*an: 😳😳😳

Astra zeneca: ride me like a horse that needs to be broken in!!

Ludis: oh ahhh ahhh yes yes

Astra zebeca: babe sit on my face 

Nova vax: *sits on her face and farts*

Astra zebeca: fuck yeah this is all I wanted 

Astra zebeca: give me ur sperm smack my ass and call me momma and we're even 

Ludis: ahh oh ahhh HEHEEEEE I'm COMING 

ASTRA: are u sure yiyre not going 

Lydus: *spills his magic seed inside her holy womb♡* 

Taskrwia: are u done now. Can we all have sex

Astea: that's all I ever wanted raskreia 😛

Kei ru: wait yiure siblings you cant do it 

Raskreua: are u saying.i cant have sex with raijeru my one true love

Kei ru: I thought I was ur one true love

Rasjreua: dont get ahead of yourself. Blood is thicker than water yaka yaka 

Ludis: wakawaka ey ey this time for Africa 

Nova: AFRICA DOESNT NEED U WHITE MAN!!!!!1

Kei Ru: SHIT UP LESBIAN!!!!!1111 *punches nova vaz into the table*

Chapter Text

 CHAPTER 11

---

*stage somewhere in rocky donia*

*jk this is dragon ball*

Kei Ru: my enemies,,, are so powerful 

Kei ru: what must I do to protect my home????!?!!? 

Kei: *rips off arm and snacks u with it*   

Kei: 

Kei: now. I must prepare my true strength 

Kei: 

Kei: aaaaaaaarhj

Kei: Aaaaaaaarghhhhhhh

Kei: AAAAAAAAAARGH

KEI: AAAAAAARRFHHVHHHGHBHHHH

KEI: WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAARRGGHHHGGGHHHH

KEI: WWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARFGHHHGGGHHHHHWOOF WOOF 

KEI: WWWWWWWWWWOOF WOO

KEI: oh sorry let me try again

Kei: WWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATGHHHHHHHGHHHH

KEI: HHHHGSAEEDRRFFHHGHJHGFDDGHJHJN

KEI: WWWWHBUUVVUVCUFGGJJHNBIUVCYFYF

KEi: cucucffugigibbibibibvivb

Kei: ㅎ초혀펴펴폏렬햐ㅠㅠㅑ쳘려렬쵸료여펴표ㅛ춀료여여ㅛㄹ쵸쵸ㅛ쵸ㅛ펴펴펴ㅠㅠㅑㅑㅜㅑㅓㅑ

Kei: vhゔcゔっゔっゔぃっっっゔぃいゔぃいゔゔcううcうfぐぐゔびぐぐふぶひゔぃゔぐぐvcうcうv

Kei: ni hao moshi moshi omelette du fromage 

Kei: I sm readyzzx 4 da pussy 

KOI: RARWRW HHRGRAWWHHL *PHELGM* HSHHSGG HRRRRKK

Kei: Those women of sapphic inclination, that neither delight nor desire the company of men, they should be instructed to cease their foolish chatter instantly.

Kei: 

KEI: WWBBUU WOOKS WHHHHRAWJJWWL

Kei: *lesbian intensifies *

Kei ru:

Kei: LESSSSBIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Chapter Text

LOCATION: KARAOKE BAR, JORDAN, SAUDI ARABIA

Raskriea has gathered all da nobles she has changed her outfit intp a badass gothic guns n roses ribbed crop top , glittery black platform shoes with skulls on the side black lipstick from colourpop adn glittery magenta eyeshadow 

Rasruja: LISTEN UP SLUTZ!!!1 TONITE WE DECIDE WHO WINS DA WAR!12!@1@$22

Raskeria: ALL MY NOBL3S AND ALL MY HOES PUT YOUR HANDS UP AND JUST GO AYYYYYR YOOOOOO!!!1!!11 YEAHHHHHH

DORANT: AYYYY YOOOOO

Raskreia: wtf who let u in here 

Ludis: LET IT GOOOOOO LET IT GOOOOOOO CANT HOLD IT BAXK ANYMOEEEE?@,#*$,,#

The Nobles: ROOOOOOAOAAAARRRR!!!

Rakrseira: MY SOLDIERS,,,SING!!!!

Noesle: ROOOOAOSSRRRRS

Rakriea: MY SOLDIERS, DANCE!!!11

nOELS: ROOOROROOROROAWWWRR!!!!

Rskiea: MY SOLDIERS, TWERK!!!!!!!

Rael: OMG U CAPITALIST PIG

Kei Ru: SHIT UP LESBIAN!!! *punches rael thru wall*

Kei ru: COMMUNISM IS JUST THE OTHER SIDE OF CAPITALISTIC EXPLOUTSTION RAEL GOD U DINT KNOW ANYTHING

Kei: only tru lesbians are commies because we distribute the love equally  ;;;)

Rael: eww gay.

lotus: whats the plan my lorde

Karius: *TWERKS*

Raskeia: smack those hoes smakx those vitch3s smack those hoes smack that--oMG NO your ass is too big *smacks it*

ra=el: *GASP* FATSHAMER!!!!1

Kei ru: didnt i punch u >: (

Rsakirea: EVERYONE SHIT UP AND FOCS!!!

Rajak: my lord I volunterr to face the enemy fIrst and draw them out

rsakrira: ok

Rajak: goodbyr every1 in case i dont make it I want takeo to know 4hat his dick is too good :'( ill miss ur dick taeko

Takeo: * slaps his ass * //// uWu now go show dem what a slut u are ;))

Karious: OMG I CANT BELIEVE THIS YOURE CHEATING ON M3 BABE.???111 *TEAR : ((((*

RAJAK: sometimes you gotta go where the dicking is good babe byeeeeee slut

Karias: PURPLE RAGAR I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL 

Takeo: my name is takeo

Karias: DONT CARE WE WILL TWERK TO TH3 DEWTH 

Takeo: omg slayyyy 😱

Takeo: I never learned how to read 😱😱😱

Every1: Omg 😱😱😱😱

Asta Zeneca: THEYRE SENDING SOME1 QUWICK AHOS GOIJG FROM US

Nova vas: raijeru u go 

Raisel: ladies first

Niva: IS FEMINISM A JOKE TO YOU??? 

Astra: *kciks raisel in the behind so he lands on the dtsgage*

Legero: wut shud I do?

Nova: idk but if u dont win im kicking ur gross boy ass

Astra Zeneca: *heckling from the audience* BOOOOO HISSSS GO BAXK TO ROCKY DONIA 

Rajak??j: i will face u like the sllutty slutty omega whore that i am *strips* 

Legero: OOh are u gonna take out your thingie 😱😱

Ragak: yes i will face u with da honour u desevre *takes out his thingie and whacks Raizel in the face w it* 

Raskriea: RUB IT ON HIS FACE AND MAKE HIM DRINK UR MAN JUICE 

Rakaj: *rubs his thingies on raizels face* 

Rai: oooohhh yeahhhhh

Raksreia: runbb it on the pole 

ragar: eggelctn idea my lorde *gets on the pole an moves his booty like a worm* a/n worm au worm au worm au 😳😳😱😱😱

Raisel: BITCHASS SLUT HWO ARM I SUPPSOED 2 COMPETE WITH DAT!!!

Astro: u expect me to provide leadershipw what do i look like jesus to u

Raijeru: *smacks lotus ass*

Lotus: hey

Raizel: oh sorry *smacks rajak ass*

Ragar; uhhh uhhh uhh yeah hit me daddy 😱

Rasor: im not ur daddy but I was his daddy ;;)

Rajaka: eww gross *projectile vomits over rai*

Lotus: look lorde the enemy is in-fightining!!!!

Raskriusa: *slaps his ass* who taught u big words u dumb slut go back 2 being a houseplant nd let da adults do the talking

Kei ru: LOOK LORDE THE ENEMIS IS ARGYING WITH EACH OTHER!!1

Rasjeaia: OMG WHERE 

Rajak: *throws his cloak at rael* *throws his underwear @ taeko* 

takeo: ooh u dirty dirty whore ;)

reaeel: I DIDNOT CONSENT 2 THIS!!1

Rajake: dont lie u whore i read ur mind

rosario: hey dd u know i was in star wars

Lotusz: NOBODY CARES ROZARIAO!!! GOD!!!11

Raskria: OMG U SLUTS STIP ARGUING!!! SHIT UP!!!1

Rajik: my next move is called cumslut prepre 2 be obliterated

Rasiel: ASTRO HELP ME U SLIT!!!!1

astra: can i peg u

Rasiel: YOUR MY SISTER GROSSS EWWW

Astra: deals off then bitch fuck u

Nova: u man whore

Raskreia: TIME’S UP!!11 WE WIN SLITS!!!!

ASTRA: OMG WHAT NO YOU CANT WIN

RASKREIA: WE WON THIS ROUND YOU BITCH! ASS! SLUT! ASS! WHORE!!! 

Xthe nobles: RRRAOAOOAOAARRRr!r!!r 1!11

ROUND 2 BITCHES XXX!

astra: we need a plan or we ;ll lose!!!

Nova vax: ugh raijeru is a useless slut i;ll do it!!! *goes 2to the stage* 

Nova saz: *TWERKS HARD* Slay lesbian kwee

Kei ruL: LES BIANS?????????????!!!!

Aaskriua: *smacks* im the only lebanese u serve slut

kei ruel: yus lorde *sucks her toes* Taeko_san: EAT MY ASS 

Kariays: whatss??@W

Toe: BITCAHSS SLUT, HES MINE

Legero: this sux see yall laters woop woop keep twelring kpes *joins the jesus orgy in heaven*

Taeko: *pulls karus hair*

karius: *becomes bald* NOOOOO MY AIER HAIR WHW WIWI!!?w>w/WW/

Ragark: the doms are fighting >:(

Taoe: omg

Lazarck: omg

*yaoi staring* 

ASTRA: *SCREECHES*

ASTRA: WE WILL NOT ;OSE TO THIS SLIT!!!!1 **points astoria @ raskrua* FITE ME LIEK A REAL YAOI PRINCESS U 2 BIT HUSSY 

Rakriea: * draws her ragnarock * face me like a real pussy u bitchasslsutasswhore

Kei rua: YUS MY LORDE!!11 ELIMINAGE THE FAKE LESBIAN

Astro: HEY I;M A REAL LESBIAN I CAN PROVE IT

rael-kun: omG u PRETEND LESBIAN cancelled cancelledncnaleleledd HASGHTAGE MINORITY RIGHTES HASTHATG FOLLOW 4 FOLLOW A=AHASHTAGE SOCIAL JUSTICE IS REAL JUSTICE

RaskreiaL: RAEL SHIT UP LESBIAN

REAL: I AM A !!!!1 ANIMAL RITES ACTIVIST

KEI: NOBODY CARES **PUNCHES SOME LESBIANS** RAWWWRRWHHH

Astro: *punches raskria*

Raskeira: you WHORE *punches arta zeneaca* 

nova sex: mu lorde!!1111 *PUNCHES KEI RU*

KEI RU: I GOT PUNCHED BY A FAKE LESBIAN??/

NOVA: YOUR THE FAKE ;ESBIAN YOU SLIT

Kei: *gasps*

Kei: Take that back

nova: no

Kya: *GASP*

Astro @ raskria: fight me u slyt 

Raskriea: wheres Legero

Astrika: AM I A JOKE TO U??U SEXIST PIG

Rael: ONG U SEXIST PIGS

* Astra ans raskriea fight * a/n: omg they can kill me !11111111111

*Every1 watches the lesbans queens fight with they are soul weapons *

*kei ru vs nove vax fight too *

A/N: CLIFFHANGER BITCHES XOXOXO

WHO WILL WIN???😱😱😱😱

 REview no flamezz or we wont tell u!! *evil grin* ,,mwahahahhaha

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

Cha

pter13

[back at the karaoke bar]

*kei ru as piccolo from the last chapter bursts in*

Kei: KAPA CENI LESBIYIENNNNNNNNN AAAAAAAAAAARGH

Ludis: who are u???1

Kei: WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH *rips off other arm and smacks LOTUS across the face, throwing him into the brick wall*

*other kei has nova bac in a headlock*

Kei: I WILL DESTROY YOU LESBIAN!!1!1!!1

Nova: SHUT UP JESUS SANTOS JULIO DE MIGUEL CRISTOS IS THAT ALL YOU SAY????? YOURE NOTHING BUT A DIMB CARIACTURE THAT MOCKS LESBIAN CULTURE !1!!1!1!

Kei: *rips nova vacs head off* FATALITY

Nova bac: U IDIOT U THINK I CAN DIE FROM THAT???1?1? IM IMMORTAL U FOOL

Kei: but are u...my immortal?1??1

*dinosaur kei bursts through the wall lotus was in rip lotus : (*

Dinosaur kei: RRAAAAAWWWR 

Rael: UMM ACTUALLY,,, DINOSAURS SQUEAK THEY DONT ROAR

Dinosaur kei: *swallows Rael whole*

Rael: *muffled* aw goddamnit not AGAIN

Rajak: WHY CANT WE BE FRIENDS WHY CANT WE BE FRIENDS WHY CANT WE BE FRIENDS *starts sobbing*

Karias: TAEKWONDO YOU ARE ONLY HOPE 

taekwondo?: ????

Karias: u must be ,,, the dragon whisperer 

Takedown: what??

Raskreia: PURPLE RAGAR GO FRENCH THE DRAGON OR SOMETHING1!1

Talked: excuse me????

Astra Zenev: THAT IS SEXUAL HARASSMENT!1!1!!1

Raskreia: *whoves her fist down astras throat* shush okay

Astra: MMHMMGFMDHHSJSJFJKFKFKD??????

Nibbles: BITCH ASS SLUT ASS WHORE

Rael: NIBBLES NO!!!1!!1! *rips his way out of dinosaur kei*

Nibbles: bitch????

Rael: *stumbles out of dinosaur entrails to scoop up nibbles and run away*

Raskreia: RAEL YOU BITCH ASS WJORE HIW DARE U BETRAY ME LIKE THIS?????1 WHO IS AGAINST THE kwEEN WILL DYe

Raw: *flips off Raakreia as he runs away*😳😳

Kei: *roars as he punches Astrarer into the dinosaurs mouth*

*dinosaur kei spits her out*

Astra: HEY THIS IS DISCRIMINATION YOU CANT REFUSE TO EAT ME BECAUSE IM WHITE!!!!1!1

Nova: omg stop whitewashing us!!!!1!1

Astra: shut up

Nova: YOU CANT TELL ME TO SHUT UP1111!!!! YOU CANNOT SILENCE THE VOICE OF THE OPPREASED!!!!1

Kei: *kicks her head like a football*

Nova: *as her head goes flying* YOU CAN TEAR ME DOWN BUT YOU CANT STOP ME FROM GETTING BACK UP 

Raskreia: now punch rozaria 

Rozaria: ??? Why??????

Raskeria: I dont like you

Roxxxxario: lord what did I ever do 2 u!!!

TAKEKO: what did rozaria do lordo

Taskeria: she stole my broccoli. Casserole recipe. 8 years agao &. Claimed it was hers

Tozaria: Lord--

Kei: keep her name out of ur thin mouth helen!!!1!1 *punches rozaria*

Raskreiaia: we R done hAIR. KEEP MY NAME OUT OF YOUR THIN MOUTH ASTER!!1!1

*kei, dinosaur kei, raskrria leaf* 

Purple Ragar: hey rajak wanna kiss 

Rajak: yes.

Karius: BUT BABE--

RAJKA: GO BACK TO YOUR BOWL CUT WHORE!1!11!!

Karias; 😫😫😫

*purple ragar and rajak kiss 😳😳😳😳* a/n: omg the gay pls I already have the covid vaccine I canf get infected 😎

Tozaria: what about me!! Lotus!!! Lotus where are u!!! A/n omg poor razoria : ( 

Chapter Text

Chapter 14

Astra: damnit raijeru!1!!1 we lost becoz u werent gay en7gh!!11!1

Astra: wheres my babe!!!! Baaaaabe!!! *BECOMES A BIRB AND FLIES AWAY TO FIND HER BABE*

----

MEANWHILE in a zn UNDISCLOSED SPACE (omg read space au heheee)

*bright lights red curtains a cardboard cut out audience (an: covid : ()*

Bright lights: wooooooo

Bright lights: ahhhhh

A/n: Wait lights cant talk >: ( get out

Bright lights: ok : (

ANNOUMVER: Welcome to the SPERRY BRINGER SHOW!!1!1!

audience: omg woooooooo aaaaahhhhh 

Wolf girl: sugoiiiiii (a/n : visceral fat so oishee : O)

Sperry Bringer: today we have a case of  not who is the father but who is the mother! Who Is The Mother of My Baby?? 

Audience: *gasp*

Sperry Bringer: three brothers are here today to each find out who's the mother of their baby. They all attended an orgy on the beach and had sex with multiple people.

*flashes to the tv*

Tao: it cant be mine because im a beta rawr <-< (an: smexy 😳 my loins r shaking) 

Takeo: tao you idiot this isnt some dumb bl bullshit

Tao: you shit ur dirty lying mouth pretty boy!!1!! No one even knoes u exist except that stalker!!1!1!

Takeo: *gasp* SHES NOT A STALKER SHES MY WIFE!!2!1@2×@@1!! *binch slaps tao across the face*

M21: *existing in the background with dead eyes*

*tao and takeo rip their clothes off and mud wrestle 😳*

Gerryy Binger: um okay. Cool. Lets bring bring them out 

*tao takeo and m21 are escorted out, tao and takeo are half dressed*

Gerry Gunger(sp?): now fellas

Tao: what did u just call me you hussy

Gerey: ????

Tao: ill have u know assuming my gender because i call mysekf a father is SO ABLEIST OF U!!2!1@!

*audience claps unsuredly*

Geerye: but

Tao: IM A FATHER PRESENTING INDIVIDUAL THAT DOESNT MEAN IM A MAN!!!!

Pringles (?]: YOU GO,,,, GIRLFRIEND,,,,

Wolf gurl: gfriend???

Pringles: DONT REMIND ME OF MY FAVORITE LESBIANS : (

Geee6: excuse me can we get back to the show pls

Takeo: not unless you apologize

Feret Bringer: who are u

Tao: AND FURTHERMORE 

GERET: listen u little shit do u want to know what hussy you knocked up or not

Tao: oh okay yeah

Gerry: thank u now as i was saying *presses a button and the red curtains part*

Gerry: now is this your baby?

Tao: YES : (

Takeo: she has my eyes

Gerry: now we've brought some people out here would u like t9 see thrm

Tao: momma?

*Previous lord bursts in* 

Pl: MOMMMMMAS HERE KIDS

Takeo: *screams*

Gerry: contestant number 1! Hes a vain long hair man who hates doing his job because he thinks its boring and instead makes other people do it for him! Previous Lord!

Pl: hey i have a name u know 

Takeo: yeah what is it

Pl:....i dont know : (

Gerry: CONTESTANT NO 2!!!!1!  hes an old grandpa with 16 grandkids and his ankles are sublime!! He was a stripper in his youth and boy would he like to tell you stories!!! GEJUTEL ANKLE KILLER

*gejutel walks in but just his ankles*

Gerry: uhhhh whats happeninh here

Gejutels ankles: *clip clop*

Gerry: …

Takeo: ….

Tao: takeo i'm scared

M21: I STILL EXIST 

Gejutels ankles: *stomp stomp*

Gery: uhh okay lets get on with the test. Yall see your beautiful baby there? Lets find her momma before she hatches!!

Tao: omg takeo we're the proud parents of a baby girl!!!!1!1

Gerry: and the mother is…. *rips open envelope*

*suddenly from the stage the egg is shaking as it cracks cracks cracks (an: like my ankle bones *lip bite*) abd BURSTS OPEN TO REVEAL A BABY TREX*

Gerry: uhh folks looks like we hsve a ...dinosaur?? Who fucked the dinosaur???

*woman in audience raises her hand*

Tao: not me

Takeo: not me

M:...

Pl: i wish i bet they have big dicks

Gejutels ankles: *two stomps for no*

??: IT WAS ME!!!1!!1!

*t rex lagus breaks through the wall of the studio*

Trex lagus: WHO STOLE MY BABY????1?111

TAKEO: TAO WHAT DID YOU DO

Tao: NOTHING!!!1!1

*Gerry gets vored whole by trex lagus*

*the woman from the audience runs up excitedly*

Woman: me!!!! Mee!!!!! Meeee!!!

*lagus trex swallows her whole, she is happy* (an: this is 4 u babe < 3)

Takeo: TAO WHAT DO WE DO

TAO: I DONT KNOW 

*gejutels ankles kick lagus trex before being eaten*

Tao: AAAAAAA!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!1!1!1!

*wakes up from the nightmare as trex lagus swallows him*

Tao: no….the nice lady from the bakery would never do that to me….

Takeo: shit up and go back to bed

*it was all a dream,,,,or was it????😳*

Chapter Text

CHAPTER 15

private image hosting

SETTING: in marmite national park USA a yung boy wanders around unsupervisesed. He ahs blonde ahri and red eyes the color of diamonds but red. He’s eartig a piece of toast with peanut butter (a/n omg im so hungyyyy) and egg. 

REAL: w

RAEL: *in a british accent* biscuit

Rael: (on instagram live)  now if u look to the left, you will see the graves of america’s founding fathers , fuck you lin manuel miranda they werent BLACK THEY WERE WHITE AND INCREDIBLY RACIST AND I THINK THE PORTAYLD OF THE FOUNDING FATHERS IN MEDIA AS GLORIFIED EFFIGIES B=PLAYED BY PEOPLE OF VOLOCRE IS HIGHLY OFFENSIVE FOLLOW ME ON INSTRAGRCFM IF YOU AGREE!!!1111

rAEL: HELL YEAH MY FAVORITE ART IS MIKU BINDER JEFFERSON. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? BECAUES IT S A POLITICIAL STATEMENT BABY. FUCK YOUR ARMCHAIR ACTIVISM!!1111 THIS IS WHY IM NOW STEPPING ON THE GRAVES OF OUR OPPRESSORS   *T-poses*

Follower on instragrm: u know nobody is buried there right?

Rael: COMMUNSIT LOSER DON’T TELL ME WHAT 2 DO!!1

Rael: *trips and falls into a hole8*

Real: AAARRRGGHGGH*protects his phone as he falls*

*real kertia lands on a rock*

Real: *screaming into the livesteream*   THSI IS A CONSPIRACY !11 IT WAS PLANTED FOR ME TO FALL IN

Baby T-rex:  rwwwowowoerr?

Rae: who said that

Bbay trex: wwrroowow owo

Rea: who are u?

T-rex: Im u but a dinosaur

Rael: sick 

Rael: LOOK EVERYONE,WE HABE AN OPPORTYINTY TO ASK THIS 65 MILLION YEAR OLD ORGANISM WHAT THEY THINK OF THE POLITICAL LANDSCAPE IN THE YEAR 2021

T-rex: evolve we must

Rael: don’t tell me what tp do baby yoda

Rael: are you jesus- 😱😱

 Trex: yes

RAEL: THATS A LIE YOUR NOT BLACK

Trex: did u just assume my race >:( 

Real: your race is extinct 

TRawr: *cries*

Real: yea thats right pissbaby cry for your mommy

*Suddenly URUGUAY BURSTS IN *

Urugay: screeching  WHERE IS!111111 MY BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kentas: SHIT UP LESBOPHOBE !!111 *PUNCHES UROGAY*

UROHAY: * BECOMES A TERRODACTYL (a/n: i cant spell heeheee) FICK YOU!!!1EDJBITCH I’LRDPL FEED YOU TO MUYR CHIDLREN!!111

rael: coming 2 u fresh from zambia a new story about rael life animorphs??? O:

Trex:actually this is namibia you racist

KEI RU shoots out the ground riding  a beanstalk

KEI: ITS AMERICA FUCKERSSSSSSS

*suddenly the scenary changes , their in a dark room with a foos ball table *

First Elder; *climbs from a wole in thesky cosplaying as Kaiba* (a/n: UFUCK YOU LITTLEKURIBOH!!1111 U RUINED MY FAVORIYETE CHAARCETR!!11)

1at: i challeng you to the ULTIMATE GAME OF FOOSBALL

RAEL: FOOSBALL IS CAPITALIST U RACIST BPIGOT!!!1

fi#rst: gee just say you cant play loser *eye roll emoji**eye roll emoji*

KEntASS: WHERE IS. M. 

KENTAS: SMACK MY ASS LIKE A DRUM

Ludik; *smacks it like a banjo*

Raw: flick my clit like a bango 😳😳🔞

Reaal: ew???????????/

Rae: omae wa MO SHINDERU

First: NANI???????????/

*Trex smashes the foosball table 11*

fir$t: NOOOOOOOO

*urokay gets eaten by a tiger  *

tiger: visceral fat so oisheee

*my uncle shows up (a/nL hi uncle!!! Miss u!11 send gifts!1)

Uncle becoming an annoucner: DEATH T LEVEL 300!11 WHAT WILL THE CHALLLENGE BE?????/

*PULLS PAPER OUT OF THE TIGERS MOUTH*

yncle: gasp

ynocol: ping pong

• Everyone gasps

WHO IS THE ULTIMATE CHALLENGER///???

*motivational kray foreskin comes fromt he groun* 

KRAW: *RIPS LUDIK’S ARM OFF* ROAAAARRR

krav: there should always be in sight the draw: a kind of a beacon that draws you through the labyrinth*

uncle: wow!! powerufl@@@! Brilliant!! amaixng@!! Who can possible defieet this monster???

krawL : hheeeeheeee

A voice: I can

*dun dun duuuuuun*

KRAWl WHOS AID THAT

voice: me you dumb fuck i can defeta you 

My uncle: let the yami no ping pong….BEGIN!!!!!!!!

*real starts playing genshin impact with first9*

Kraw: hhuhuhuhheh heeeeee heeee hheee

mcchael jackson: OW

krav: *melts like the snowcaps:((*

Uncle: global warming isnt real get some real problems 🙄🙄🙄

Kray: ok :(

First: omg babe is dat u??4444😱😱

*a giant whale beaches itself abs spits out 3rd* ₩

Shale: *is beached*

ping pong third: motivational kray I challenge you to a duel!566 of PING PONG!111 

First: is that roctis 

Michael Jackson : 🏃♀️🏃♀️running away 🏃♀️ dont want another lawsuit 🏃♀️🏃♀️❗❗

Bono: ohhhyeahhhh 

U.N.C.L.W: OMG ITS BONO

first: heehee boner 

Third:*smacks him* PING PONG IS LIFE OR DEATH STOP JOKING AROUND

trex: my whole species is extinct what trauma do u got 🙄 

Rael: OMG HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT YOUR TRAUMA DOESNT INVALIDATE HIS TRAUMA 

T+: I'm literally from 65 million years ago idc about ur modern social standards u snowflake

real: OMH HOW DARE YOU!55 DONT YOU KNOW THATS A SLUR

 trex: come @#e me pissbaby

kaw  : *tries to escape the ping pong arena* 

SUDDENLY TR SKY DSPLITS IN 2 AND ASTRA ZENECA AND NHOVE VAXX DISEND FOM THE SKY!T111

astra: MY ARC ISNT OVER YET WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT

Chapter Text

Choater ??

LOCATION: DA RIVER GANGES

Hi my name izz Ragare i am da WWON AND ONLY11122111121!!1! maharagar!!!11 (DAT MEANS MAHARAJAHS WIFE 4 ALL U PREPZ!!!) I haf long blond hair dat goez down to mai butt (omg seckzee) and it haz scarlut red streakz liek da onez on mai hurt every time my bf franken ignores me : ((( (omaigee plzzzz dont tell da maharajah dat i hav a bfff i'm suppozed 2 bee pure and vaginal) 

i am a man so i hav a p33p33 but dont tell da maharajah bcuz he thinkz im vaginal 👰

i wear a red veil dat covers mai face bcuz im ~~royalty~~ and all da peasant PREPZZZ dunt deserve to see mai face!!!1!11!1 i hav blu eyes dat r lik a a wet dogs sad face bcuz my bf franken always makez me saddd : ( under mai robe i wear purple fishnet stockings and a slutty corset dat i gave my wrung measurements so it strangles me to remind me of mai UNENDING PANE AN TURMENT 😥

da maharajah will nevah c it bcuz i told him if my vaginitality iz gone da country will nut hav rain 4 five hundred dayz an five hundred nights an he believed me heheeheeee : >

i must wait hair 4 twelve years until mai bf frankiee is saved from da curse of dat witch CADIZ ETRAMA DI RAIJERU!!!1!1!1!

den i will KILL DA WITCH an plunge maiself onto mai frankieeess sword in a final act of luv and sacrificE : >

dis is mai story xxx FANGZ FOR LISTENING PREPZ!!!!1!11!

Chapter Text

LOCATION: rocky donia XDDD noblesse mansion 😳

Astra Zikaka: RAIJERU WHERE R U

Assstra Chahwhcha: RAIJERU 🤬🤬

Astrta Zikwk: get ur dumb butt over here and stop making kissy faces with ur boyfriend we have to plan world domination

Cricket: *cricket*

Astra Senka: DONT MAKE ME SUMMON YOU >: (

*spirit of raijeru comes down from the heavens*

Raijeyeru: thank u for contacting cadis Etrama di Jerusalem. We’re sorry he cannot come to the phone right now as he is currently being dicked down by thirteen different bbd Jesus cocks. Please try again later thanks 😘xxx

Astra Zenika: RAIJERU U HORE U CHEATED ON ME??!!?? UR ONE AND ONLY TRU LUV???!? I WILL

BECOME

  THE

       GODSLAYER!!!111111

NoabbaVax: omg kill Jesus yes queen Christianity is a scam destroy religion girl stan pablo escobar gatekeep slayyy

Astra Zeikan: wtf is wrong w \ u

  r u high again?

Nova Vaxxxx: if I’m high I’m high on the EUPHORIA OF JUSTICE

Astera Zeneca: what justice

novex: POWER

Astera: all you did today was post hate comments on someone’s twitter post because they drew atem without dreads

Nova Vac: um excuse me astra it’s called whitewashing educate yourself 🙄🙄 I cant have an ign0ran$t cVnt for a bestie

Astra Zenaa: bitch do u wanna go🤗🤗🤗

Nova Vax: ...make out?

Astra Zenaca: eww no no homo 🤮 

Nova Vac: it’s not gay if we’re wearing socks tho

Astra Zenaca: 😳

Muzaka: I woke up from my nap to check up on you kids. Anyone causing trouble, hmmm? 🥰

Nova Vpad: *whips him* bad boy. No one told u 2 talk 🤨🤨

Muz: Hahaha. You're into some weird shit. (takes a deep breath) BARK BARK BARK BARK GRRRRR WOOF WOOF BARK GRRR RGRRRR GRRGRGRGRGDHASGDFA GRRRRR BARK GROWL WOOOF RUFFFFF BARK BARK WOOOOOO AWOOOOO GRRRRRR

~~~

*Aster Zeneca and noba bac planning da rescue of raijeru from jesus orgy hell*

Aster Zeneca: nova how do we get in heaven

Nova Vaxx: we heave em

Aster Zeneca: what

Nova Bac: what

Piccolo whos still here 4 some reason: we heave dem

Astre Zeneca: omg like we throw up on a picture of blsck jesus???

Piccolo: not just any picture 🙄🙄🙄🙄

Astra Sneeca: whatever lizard man

Piccolo: my name is piccolo

Piccolo: 

Astra Seneca: pickle low?

Piccolo: no

Nova Caxc: no its pickled hoe

Piccolo: no

Astra Zeneca: no its tickle below

Piccolo: no.

Nova Vax: no its piccadillo

Piccolo: No

Astra Zneca: omg its prick a hoe

Piccolo: No

Nova Vax: omg its hidehoo im a pickled hoe

Piccolo: NO

Assstea Snecwa: whatever pickle hoe 🙄🙄

——

LOCATION: DA PALACE OF NEW MUMBAI

*astera zeneva breaks thru da wall of da palace*

guard: um mommy u cannut do dat : (( 

*nova vax punches thru da window to pumch da guard*

Nova Vax: how dar u assume her gender?+??!??!?!?!

Aster zika: bitxh who DA FUCK R U ????1?1

ragare: >: ( i am da maharagar who r u 

Aster zika: youre the manager??? BRING ME TO JESUS RIGHT NOW

ragare: back off Karen 🙄🙄🙄

Nova vax: BRING HER TO JESUS SLUT

ragare: I wish someone wuld bring me 2 Jesus : ( 

Piccolo: are. Are you Jesus 

Ragare: no this is Patrick

Muzaka: Jesus is my little rascal

Nova: dogs don’t talk now be a good boy and shut it

Muzaka: yes mommy 😳😳😳 (omg dis iz 4 u my cole slaw 😍)

Now a Vax: ezcus me,

Muzaka: oh i mean Hahaha. You're into some weird shit. (takes a deep breath) BARK BARK BARK BARK GRRRRR WOOF WOOF BARK GRRR RGRRRR GRRGRGRGRGDHASGDFA GRRRRR BARK GROWL WOOOF RUFFFFF BARK BARK WOOOOOO AWOOOOO GRRRRRR *pisses on th floor*

Bianca Cac: 🥰🥰🥰 thanks babe xx

Muzaka: anything 4 mai babe 😜😜😜

Ragare: can we PLS get back to FIDNING JESUS INSIDE MY PUSSY

piccolo: omg u have a cat????

thrawn: your pussy is dry

Astrans Zeneca: ERRE NOT FINDING JESUS TO FUK U WERE FINDING JESUS TO KILL HIM BECUZ HE STOLE MY BF RAIJERU!1!1!!1

Tagarae: arent u siblings

Astranzarca: dont u have kids to neglect

That’s great: how can I hav kids if I am vaginal???

Nova bavard: binch u don’t even have a vagina I can see ur pineapple 🍍 

Ragargege: ITS CALLED HAVING HIPS STOP FAT SHAMING ME 

astatteaa zenevac: omg u fat shaming bitch, CANCELLED 

nova vaxgags: U CANT CANCEL ME UR TRANSPHOBIC

AST agwbabwhdh: how dare u call me transphonic when u kno I am hooked on phonics 

Piccolo: i don’t kno how 2 read : ( i am just a zucchini : ((

Ragagrage: omg that’s so sad im so hotny now 

Picocoslot: eww put ur gaping hole back into its bag pls 

Ragaggrgae: it’s called BEING JOYFULLY AVAILABLE not lik u kno much abt pleasing a man 

Pciciolo: IM A ZUCCHINI 

Ragars Gee: well don’t be too hard on urself we all have problems 

Piccolo: i will squeeze all the pee in my body out on 2 u then wring u out like a crusty dish towel 

Ragagreg: hot 😛😛

MAHARAGAR: the SIDESTORY

RAGARE WUS 1 nce A RESPEKTED KLAN LEADER K AS IN KARDASHIAN BECAUSE HE HAD A FAT A$$ LIKE THE KARDASHIANS RAGAR ONE DAY DECIZED 2 S0LVE ALL HIS PR0BL3MS THRU MARRIGE (oLiY LOTION IF UR READING THIS IM UR BIGGEST FAN😍😍😍 ] s0 RAGSE MARRIED A 🤑RICH🤑 ZADDY NAMED HUGE HEFNER😜😜 WHL MADE Him A PL4yB0Y BUNNY IN HIS 65 MILLION DOLLA MANSHION

RAGAR BECAME A 🤑TIKTOK STAR😍😍😜 AND S0LVED W0RLD HUNG3R THRU THE P9WER OF HIS M4GICAL PU$$¥💦💦 

1 DAY HE WUS FISHING IN THE RIVAH WID HIS BEAR HANS WHENC SUDDNELDY HE

AStro: shut up raggar nobody cares about u

nova: SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND RUN ME LIK3 A RIVER

Piccolo: LIKE A RIVER, LIKE A RIVER

NOVA: SHUT YOUR MOTH AND RUN ME LIKE A RIVER

asta: what the fuc

ragar: im immortal

atra: *smacks him* FAKE P0S3R BITCH ILL SHOW YOU MY JMMORTAL

ATSTA: YOUR NOT A TRUE GOTH !!{1111

NOVA: LIKE A RIVER, LIKE A RIVER

RAGAR: g$OBBING.  YOU FUCKIG CVNT ASS B1TCH

: cunt is not a sexy wor

Astra: shut up imbecil 

nova: who said that

piccolo: 

ragar; breathes

astral: shut the fuck up

Astra; suck my dick

ragar: ew why wuld I suck ur stinky ass hussy

astra: your hussy smekls like mackarel and cheese 🤢

Muzaka: I love cheese😍

Rag: omg lawlz datz  a good idea 4 my onlyfanz 😍😍😍😍

astar: H3Y U CANT STEAL MY IDEA ILL COPYRIGHT STRIKE U

RAu: *puts 🧀 on his pu$$¥💦💦💦^* 

Chapter Text

Ccj apter 18(?)?(

*scene: fransician monastry (hehehe get it FRANsicisian) a gay man stands alone, praying before the altar*

Gay man: wair r dos hapi days they cem so hard (19 HORNY COWBOYSSS SOOO HARDDDDD XDD🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠) 2 find 😣

Gaie aman: i try 2 reach 4 u but u close ur 👁 watevr happpen 2 out love💔 i wish i understud🤔 it used 2 b so gud 🤤it used 2 b so NICE🥵🥵

GAY3YEAMANNA?,: SO WEN U 🙉 ME DARLING💏CANT U 🙉ME 🆘️🆘️🆘️

Gatua.mana: da 💕 u gave me only.it can 🧷🤢 me 🆘️🆘️🆘️🆘️

Gaya mana: wen ur gone 🏃♂️🏃♂️ how can i rven try to go onnnnnnnnn

*lady&: frankYYYY u naught boy where r u??? 😜😜😜😜

Frankenateine*?): oh 💩 

FRNAKANEM: IM NOT HERE

ladysvgw: then whos talking to me???🤨

Frnajeknatein: ….ITS ME, GOD

laldy: god? WHERE WERE U WHEN I NEEDES U????? HUHN???×?×?

God: bitch i was here the entire time stop sucking dick and youll notice

Ladyayys: IM A FUCKING LESBIANS U DUMBASS TWAT

GID: GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH I CANT UNDERSTAND YOU SLUT

laldysyys: *mjffled* ITS A TAIL YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND YOU VANILLA ASS FUCK

ladyd: puritan ass bitch😒

Frbakenstien: wzcuse me,,,, i was SINGING

god: oh sprry i thought you were ded thats whem i came 

Laydsy: i remember when i came 🤤

God: ew

Frbakenstein: ew 

Layds: what you think wombina cant orgasmism????? sexist privileged scumbags

God: anyway

God: bye

God: ps

God: your bf is currently tly boning all my sons including black jesus pls get him to stop

God: bye

*poof*

FrankYEYYS,: hes WHAT????

Laydy: why do you care he dumped your lame ass 

Frnakey: NO HE DIDNT,,,,, HE WLULD NEVER,,,, WERE IN LOVE

LADY; whatever *whips* sing btch

Frnajey: *whimpers* u seem so 💨 fart away,,, thu u r 🚹 near,,,,u made me feel 👽ve. Ut somethint 🎲 i fear

Frnakey: ...NO IM. NOT DOING THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA SVAE MY BF RAIJERU FROM BLACK JESUS!11!1! *BREAKE THE WHIP IN HALF WITH HIS TEEF?

LAUDY: naughty boyi...youwill be Punished🤨

Frnakey: I BR4AK FREE FEUM UR POWER EVIL WITCH!!!! WITH THIS SWORD I AM FREE!!!!

EVIL WITHC: i havr a name u know thats so rude you could atleast call me it

Frnakey: sorry what is it again

Evwial 2atch: LUNARK

fn rmm aye: lubark?

Eveil wi th c: LU NA RK

frnakey: luna bar, got it xx

Lunabar: Lu- whatever get out of my site you disgust me you vlond gay sl uht

Frbakey: HAHA I TRICKED YOU INTO RELEASING MY BONDS

lunarbar: there was no bond you idiot you paid me to whip you 

Frnakey: another lie in yout twisting web of deceit designed to manipulate and ensnare me in your web!!! I wont fall for it tjis time evil witch lunabar!!!!

Launark: okay bye go away go rescue your dumb slut boyfriend whos definitely cheating on you with sixteen jesuses and a whole farm of horny cowboys DOWN HERE ATRAM RANCH

lunqrk: *strips away the backdrop revealing they were at rma ranch the entire time😱😱😱😱 a/m: omg no way!! Ram.ranch home of the NINTEEN HORNY COWBOYS SOOO HARDDDDD

Frnkaney: NANI KORE GA???? 

LUANTK: in here….you will find your RAIJERU. Being banged by NINTEEN HORNY COWBOYD HERE AT RAM RANCH and black jesus.

To be continued????

Chapter Text

Real kerita wis staying inside hees flag in colleg 1 day when Y/N came 2 his flat wearingh a brighf sparkly girly🤢 sequeen dress with h floweds in her hair n shaved armpitz n glottery shampoo, wet in da rain smell1nf fresh but. Dbe

Y/n was so upset shd collapzed into real's arms whrn he opned da doro.

"What's wrong ???" Real asked in his husky masculine bad boy 16yo juvenile prison bad boy teen romance hunk jock but also popular cute nerd y kid with fflasses voice (😍) Y/N looked ashast, becuz it wus lazme to cry in front of Boyz!!!!! Beccus biyz were WEAK , they didnt grow up readingh the hunger gamez or divergetnt or fighting for there hogwartz House so they didbnto understand the pain and da maturity of living in da grown up world and takinf part in pcoolticis. "Xont borher," yn growled pushing past rawl to come inside his flat tahg his rich daddy was paying for, unlike yn who was paying for her modest flat in Upper manhattan with a sky view of da empire dtaage builfjbg by workingh hard at da coffee shop down da street. He eojfm never understand.
"Please Y/N, tell me whats wrong," rael insisted folloeing after y/ns wet but flowy hair that her idiot friends had made her die pink!@@ she hates it!!

"Yiu idiot can't you tell@@!" Y/N finally lost it "my friends made me dress GIRLY to go to a stupid house party to impress BOYZ!!! Im soooo pissed!@!! I was in my room reafjng fnaf fanfiction and rhey disturbed me only to set up on a blind date with some dumb ugly football player who has a crush on me@1"

Raeal looked upset. "Oh...so do uou like him??? How did da date go???"

Y/N lookefh at him in disgeblelief. "Yiou idiot," she saud, changcinf from her high heels to her usual Converse all star sneakers(black,ofc,like everything she owned!!) "Whatdoes it LOOK LIKE‽??‽" y/n lingef at a dhcokef rawl grabbign his collar (he wus wearing a whifte shirt with a folklore cardigan & beige cargo pahnts with doc martens high top leather shoes inside his own house on a fridag night, dont question it ts for the arsthetic) b4 realizfh dat they were so close.....d.....omg

But feal was a dumb boy snf she could not like him!!! She didnt!!! It wasn't her fault thatvasll 5he boyz in da school were smittedn with her,she was just an emo book nerd skinny 5''6 pale average girl who wore brandy melville and band tshirtsfrom underground bands these uncultured ppl have never heard of and got dress code violated at school 4 being too fashionable and only read books and never talked to anyone but she just wanted to be left alone really@!111 why did everyone in love with her!!!UGH SO ANNOYING!!!!

Y/N took off without another word running back into da storm with her mascara running down her face in the rain but I'm like a cool way not messy and ugly because that's just hoe she was unlucky like that!!!!!

Omg she jusvt wanted 2 be left alone!@@111+ STUPID SCHOOL, UGHY

she didnt want 2 be fought over all the time by all da guys in school she just wanted to be left alone!!1

Y/n ran thru the night until she suddenly slipped in the rain and dhaw her life flashing before her eyes, before she coidl use her brazillian jiujutsu training of 8 years and get to her feet on her own she felt warm arms catch her from behinf before she hit the pavement

"Woah there y/n! Careful!! I MEAN...YOU IDIOT, HAHA YOU ALMOST FEEL BAKA!!!"

Y/n looked up with irritation at the handsomfr features of her annoying classmate, &her 1 classmate who fif not have a crush on her, katsuki bakugou 

:you are so annoying×##!" Y/n shouted struggling out of his grip. First Rael, now bakugo!!! Will she ever catch a break???

"Woah there don't be such a jerk, I just saved your life you know!!" Bakugo said smugly but y/n realized something waw wrong.

"Kacchan...are u sick???"

Bakugou turned bright red blushing in embarrassment at y/n leaning forward to check his temperature "N-NO! BAKA! NOTHING IS WRONG WITH ME!" He slapped y,n's hand away and took off running in the other direction but yn had figured it out.

He was an alpha!!!! It wus da full moon so he would b transforming into a warewolf soon! Yn's eyed widened in shock. On no, would he come back for her?? She hated him so she wasn't gunna help, she started doing run too because let's let's honest he probably liked her too!! She wasn't dumb she noticed the way he looked @ her it was just like rael!!×

Y/n got on the bus finally panting , she was about to take a seat when she bumped into someone else-

*THSI AGAIN???* she thought , before she looked yo at saw who it was....

"FRANKEN-SENSEI!!!"

Franken sensei smiled sgently at his protege, y/n, whom he had taught 30 martial arts to since the age of 6. He was like a father to her but all da dumb blonde girlz in her class thought he was hot 🙄🙄 (typical girlzz )

"Hello y,n, you look tired today, care to tell me what happened?" 

Yn finally broke down sobbing "I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE SENSEI, I JUST WANNA B LEFT ALONE WITH MY BOOKS!!! I HATE BOYS🤢🤢 THEY ARE ALWAYS INTO ME!!I DIDNT EVEN DO ANYTHING!!" 

lets not forget the time she was forced to go to a Harry style concert (or whatever his dumb name was( and even tho she was reading the mortial instruments the entire time , he picked her out from the crowd...at this point u would think they did it on ourpsos!!!

Franken stein embraced his daughter figure(u couldn't tell they werent related becuz yn was pretty just like him) "it's because you're so beautiful, y/n, but irs okay because I will never left those stinky boys ever date u!! They don't deserve my little princess" 

"Especially not that troublemaker real kertai!! I HAVE BEEF WITH HIS FATHER, YOU KNWO??? HE ONCE MADE ME TRACK HIM DOWN THROUGH INDIA BECAUSE HE BECAME OBSESSED WITH THE IDEA OF BECOMING THE MAHARAJAH"S WIFE AND I HAD TO HELP THE POLICE FIND HIM BEFORE HE DEFACED ANY MORE HISTORICAL MONUMENTS BY STRIPPING DOWN AND POSING ON THEM TRYING TO ATTRACT WEALTHY CULTURED MEN"

"oh wow, no wonder rael hates talking about his dad"

"He also peed in a crowded bus one time- "

"actually can you not this is too much even for me" 

"Sorry y/n"

"It's ok dad" 

Franken sensei looked at yn in surprise "did you just call me dad?? Oh, y/n, you know I've always wanted a daughter🥺🥺"

Yn rolled her eyes "omgggg your embarrassing me dad!!!" 

"Am I really your dad???"

"Yes ofc course, no one else raised me,I  am a strong independent woman today because of your martial arts training and I will never forget that now can we pls not have an emotional conversation in public its really ruining my self image!!" 

Franken sensei laughed . "OK OK, but I am so happy, I've always wanted to be your dad so I will treat you to ice cream after this "

Y/n was embarrassed by the parental affection but what she did not see was the envious and sad looks of bakugou sitting at the back of the bus, he was upset because he didn't have a dad he was also secretly in love with her even though he treated her like an asshole and it rlly bothered him that frankenstein considered rael an option but not him, omg he was going to fight rael for y/n's love no matter what it took!!!@ his werewolf side was fighting to come out 

tomorrow they would battle to the DEATH— and finally see who was worthy of y/n!!!

---

won day nova wuz walking in da park when she saw uh feral skuwerel attacking sum dum prepz who ran away screming bcuz they wear pussys. da skuwerel then did sum PAKROUR an pirout into a trashcan. nova smirked at dah dum dum skuwerel tyring to do (XD doodoo) sum sik moves while being a prep dont u know only goffs can do cool stuff liek dat!!!!!111!11

nova decided dat dah skuwrel wuld b a gud pet and collaboratur so she used her magic powerzzz (shes a witch bcuz she's kewl ;P) to free him from duh shackles of his earthly prison (A/N: acab fuk da puulize blam). she wuz disappointed to lern dat duh parkour skuwrel wuznt a skurweeel after all but a guy who looked like duh lead singer of duh band ___ which wuz her favorit. he had sharp fangs and messy silver hair he wuz wearing a ripped white tee over sum ripped skinny jeanz with red converse bcuz dis part of duh story is set in 2006 okay bcuz duh author is 2 old 2 kno wattpad y/n fics : ( she wuz preteen during duh fan fiction.net renaissance respekt ur elders

his hair wuz crimped by uh clothes iron and his clip in neon blue extensions wr melted like a chocolate bar u put in ur back pocket an then forget abt so when u sit down u think u shit urself but it tastes gud so u lick it and then lick it an then u think u have a poop kink and that's how u end up in a bdsm mommy dom group chat where u pay a college student 2 tell u to lick ur own balls oops dis fit isnt nsfw my bad mr boss man pls dun fire me :( I have seven imaginary children to feed just kidding I have two dogs and they'd b very disappointed in me jk again pls help me I cant stop lying :(

"eww what the fack r u" nova said her nose scrunching up like a slinkie bcuz mr skurewel man smelled like spoiled broccoli heating up in da sun all day

"im a skewerel" the skerewel boasted proudly, expanding his large pics like a ballun

"okay and I'm duh queen of Englund" she rolled her i

"OMG U COLONIZING MURDEROUS BITCH I HOPE U CHOKE AND DIE UR A HATFUL WASTE OF SPACE ON R PLANET WHEN WE SHULD BE BREEDIG PEACE AND LUV" astra zika, astra Zeneca's cloun dat escaped from da clune faciitee in leik chap 6idk go look it up 

"wtf are u" noava said liek she said a lot (omg get sum new content)

"wtf is dat" the skerewel man who wiz named muzak and nova knew dis becuz he had it tattooed on his forhead ok!!!

"My name iz...." aster zika paused 4 dramatik effeckt but nova an muzaka did nut respund so she just continue anyway "Aster Zika, dah enemeney of dah noble race! I cum 2 destroy u puny humans!!!!!!1111!!"

"and? get in line sis" noava scofed wile muzak did a z snap behind her an flipped his melted wig

"ummhummm you hear dat girlfriend!"

"If u will nut let me destroy da human race then I will destroy u 1st!!!!11!!" aster zika proclaimed, changing from her roach form to an even more disgusting roach form (ha take that dragon ball man!111!!!!)

"eww" nova said as she sprayed dah roach of aster zika wif all natural peppermint oil spray

"AHHHHHHWHWHHHHHH U HAVE FUND MY ONLEE WEAKNESS!!!1111!!!" aster Zia screamed shielding her bug eyes, "I will return 4 venengnenace!" she magically ppoofed away bcuz she was a clone of Astra Zeneca who wuz also a witch liek nova

"gud riddanse" nova sade as she put away dah peppermint spray "now u will b my dog ok"

"wat" muzaka roared

"bad dog" noava said an she sprayed him wit da peppermint spray

"yes mummy" muzak whspered as he got on all 4s liek a dog

"now woof" noava ordaired

"arrr wufff woof rooofff rooofie"

"no bad dog do u want 2 summon aster zika da enemy of da noble rase here again"

"no mistreees sorry mistress : ("

and dat wuz how nova befriended uh skuerewel man who smelled like spoiled brokoli

----*presente day*-----

muzak secrit wuz dat he wuznt a skuerewel or a homless man but insted a wearwolf . he wuznt an omeega or alpha or beetle or any of dat dum abo stuff but a real wearwolf liek wit da fangz an everythin

Muzak was a high skooler at da sut cok kiri pal skool and wuz in da eleventeenth grade but he didn't liek skool cuz they wuldnt let him howl and bite ppl 4 funsies

but how else wuz he suppsed to get a werewolf klan????? he needed to turn da dum high skoolers in2 werewolves so he culd beat da evul threat of aster zika and nover vac who wr gonna take over da wurld

so Muzaka dropped out of skool an became a gang leader an smoked weed all day while trading his nfts an arguing w ppl on twitter (a/n: haters!!!111!! stoop flaming mah storee!!!) u miht think dat hes supah skary 

won day Muzaka wuz in a consultation wit gangstah Elmo (omg shoutout to mah otha fic!!!1111) abt taking out an n-nammhi for him (I dun know how 2 spell it XD) when he wuz taken up in a whoooooo whirlwindddd so skary

elmo wuz scared but muzak wuz readi 4 dis moment cuz he waned 2 b Dorothee from da wizard of oz since he was a little dog (NUT TOTO!!!!111 OKAY!!!!!! DOROTHEEE!!!) 

as they wooooooshed up in da whirlwind muzak started singing SOOOOOMMEEEEEWHHEREEEEEE OVERRRR DA RAINBOWWWWWW WAYYYY UP HAAIIIGH Hheheheh just liek me rite now XD 

den dey wr transporta pottied 2 da wurld of oz with da Oompa Loompa (no copyright!!!1!!!! dun sue me prepzzzz) 

****alll of da chareters r now transplanted in2 oz axcet muzak and gangstah elmo who have 2 fite their way through 2 reach aster zika***

Chapter Text

"Omg takeo i had a dream dat we werre being sewed in da family court for unpayed child sapport" tao cried 2 takeo who wauznt listneing bcuz he wuz 2 busy poloshong his guns

"Omg takeo stop polishing ur guns and listen 2 me!!!!"

"I am polishong my guns what do u want" takeo sayed 

"Do u remember dat orgy we had on da beach where urogai explodeded" tao askeded

"Whos urokagai"

"Da guy who exploded!!!! Keep up!!!!2"

"Okay" takeo replyed still pilishong his guns

"I think dat we r deadbeat dads who owe child sapport in da family court!!" Tao cryed out loud bcuz if he cryed in his head no 1 wuld hear him

"No i war a condom" 

"Well i didnt!!!!!!1!1"

"But ur sterile so no 1 cares" 

Tai gaspee "omg wat do u mean im stereo"

"U cant have no children bcuz ure too gay"

"Not tru i haf a gf her name is PLANE GIRL"

"U cant dste a plain u dumb idiot"

"Dont cal me a dumb isiot u dumb idiot" 

Dey started 2 fist fight becuz dey wer 2 lozers who owed child sapport in da family court but wer 2 deadbeat 2 paye it)

**da next day**

Takeo openeded da male bcuz dat was his chore dat week and he saw a few adverteasemens 4 sum new bubble tea plaise an sum advertiesssements 4 sum penis enlargement sirjury witch he put in his pahcket bcuz takeo as previously disgussted had a 4 inch penis an he wuld nevar get da ladies (an men if u r a homossssexual dats ok dis is 2023 nut 2007 ok we haf 2 support da gays wooo pride) if he had a tieny peewee

Den he saw it….. A sitation 4 da family court of da korea 4 m21 pl tao an muzaka….but nut him bcuz every1 forgut he existed but dat waz ok dis time bcuz it finally paid of

“Tao baby honey cakes” he called out 2 tao in da large house dat dey shuld rlly invest in a intercom sistem. 

“Wut do u want loserrrr” tao yelled back from da room bcuz he had just beaten takeo in da call of duty (hee hee dooty) or sumthing idk im not a gamer gurl ok 

“I dont want u but da supreme court or something does”

“Y r dey suing me 4 being 2 handsum”

“No deyre suing u 4 being a slut” takeo said as he handed tao da letter

“WAT” tao screamed as he opened it an he dramatikly turnd 2 da camera except dere waznt a camera …or wuz there??? Da government replaced da birdz wif da robots dat will 1 day eat our souls so y wuldnt dey film it and put tiny little camamers in da covid vaccine 

**2 be continued next time***

THXX PLSSSSS REVIEW NO FLAMING OK DUN BE A HATR flamingosss no flaming ok thx shout out 2 da homiezzzz 

Chapter Text

“Omgod takeeo we shuld rly kall brother ria cuz hes sum kind of lawer is nt he” tao saided

“Hes also a fuking hottie” da wolf m&m added unprompteded (c!!! I use big langweuigi so all u hater prepz can fuk off!!!!) 

Both tai an takeo looked @ him in sirprise bcuz dey didnt know he culd talk

“I thought u were a wolf” tao asked

“I thought u were a whore” m&m who @ dis point had started 2 wear a m&m halloween consume dat color changed by his mood today it wuz red bcuz he wuz rlly hiornyy heehee :>

“no my name is tao” toad respondeded an wuz now also in a toad costume liek toad from mario bcuz i am a gamer gurl lawl XD

“U r both stupid hoes so shut up ok” takeo ordered looking up brother rai on his phone

“But im the stupider and sluttier 1 ok” tao said 2 m&m whos contume had changed 2 a yellow m7M bcuz he was shy blusheee

“Dis website sayz dat bro rai isnt even a lawer” takeo said

“Wut do u mean hes not a lawer he did my taxes dis year” tao said confuzed omg every1 goo do ur taxes right now ok dey r dew april 15th!!!!!!!!

“No dats an accountant”

“I did an accountent” m&m added n now his color wuz purple bcuz idk im just quirky lik dat lol

Both of dem ignored m&m bcuz dis is 2023 an takeo is now da one whose nut bing forgotten rawr 

“Let me call raijeru” takeo suggested

“When will franky get back from his mission 2 ecuador 2 convert dose sad poor people 2 christianity” tao asked

“U idiot tao dats nut why dey do missions” takeo replied

“Why nut” tao asked

“Bcuz ecuador is already 99% christian duh” takeo replied rolling his eyez 

“Dont u think dat one percent iz important”

“No u dummy u eat the one percent”

“Oh okay”

“Now shut up an let me call bro rai”

“Now shut up and let me do bro rai” m&M suggested again dis time from da back where he was posed naked on a couch liek rose from da titanic movie where she tells jack 2 paint her lik a french gurl but ive never understand dat scene bcuz how can u paint someone in a language lik is he gunna paint her in da letters french its a major plot holeeee larger than urokai’s butt

Takeo an tao ignored him again as da phone went ring….ring… ring… b4 picking up wit a ottomated answering system

“Hello u have reached brother rai’s office home of all your litigation and trust fund needs i am nut in da office @ da moment pls leave a message and mayb i’ll eventually get back 2 u beep”

“Helloooooo helloooooooo” tao yelled in2 da phone

“Stop it we only have lik thirty seconds 2 leave a massage!!!”

“Operatr pls i want 2 speak 2 brother rai hellooooo”

“Hello no one is available 2 take ur call right now pls leave ur name and number with a message and we will get back 2 u”

“O-P-E-R-A-T-O-R” tao spilled out as he pressed da buttons

“If this is urokai, pls press 1, if dis is a current client pls press 2, if dis is a new client pls press 3, if dis is da irs then i am in mexico”

“TWO” tao yelled

“Pls hold 1 moment i will transfer u 2 our customer service division”

“Fuking finally u can never get anywhere wit dese dumb robots nowadays” tao complained 2 takeo

“Hello dis is miss lagus of laugs milk inc dank u 4 calling how may i help u”

“I want 2 speak 2 bro rai on a leegal matter its v.v.. importante”

“Brther rai is not available rite now may i ask who iz calling pls”

“Dis is takeo an tao from da frankenstein household his brother raijeru gave us his numbah”

“U skinny boys! Y have u nut come down 2 miss lagus’ cafe an let me feed u up!”

“Im lacose interesant” takeo said

“Ur gunna be lagus intolerant if u dunt come down 2 da cafe rite now”

“Ok but can we speak 2 bro rai first”

“Ok but he aint here u hear”

“Is he dere”

“I just told u he aint here u got wax in ur ears????”

“How did u kno” said tao who had gotten cotton stuck in his ears for five yrs bcuz he wuz using q tips and wuz 2 embarrassed 2 go 2 da ear doctor

“MIGUEL SANCHES DES NICE BOYS R LOOKING 4 U DEYRE FRIENDS OF UR BROTHER”

“Which 1” a muffled voice said from da other line

“U only hav 1”

“No i hav da fake 1 an da real 1”

“Who is da fake 1”

“Miguel sanches de manuel garcia lopez” 

“I thought dat wuz u”

“Oh yeah it is”

“Uh hellooooooo i can hear u” tao said

“Dats nice we r all vry happy 4 u”

“Listen ok!!!!! We hav a vry srs case in da child curt ok!!! We owe da state millions of dollars”

“Dunt care”

“We culd go 2 jail!!!!111”

“Say hi 2 chris chan 4 me”

“Da prosecutor is miguel sanches de ricardo rodriges!!!”

“Wtf did u just say”

“Da prosecutor is miguel sanches de ricardo rigrids!!!”

“Dat is da man who…. Took away my law lisense”

“Ok so do u c y dis is vry important!!!”

“I will destroy him in da curt of law….1nce an 4 all” bro rai said as he crushed da phone in his hand and disconnected da call

“Dis is da fifth phone uve smashed dis week!!!!” miss lagus yelled

“I HAV 2 DEFEND MY HONOR”

“U dont got no honor u got dishes 2 do and a phone 2 replace!!!!!”

Bro rai ran out of da cafe only 2 run in2 a phone pole but dont wurry he will get somewhere eventually an will solve da case 

CONTINUED DA NEXT TIME DA DUN?????

Chapter Text

a/N: I hacked this chick's story bc i was bored lol it's REALLY bad like why would anyone waste their time reading this garbage? i spend my time reading academic fiction, like how the symbolism in the movie alien symbolizes how much the director wants to fuck aliens and it made me want to fuck aliens but instead i have to settle for a middle aged divorcee antivax gun rights advocate martial arts instructor oh how i wish for the aliens to consume me for my brain is too large for this mortal plane of existence. how vapid and insipid you peasants are, do you find your stupidity entertaining? how could you not know what the mathematical constants and physical constraints our world is placed under? i, after all, am well aware ---i am a physics student at a major american research university. i commit welfare fraud because my rich dad left me a trust fund and our income is zero. i buy $12 bread while you peasants buy $2 bread---I feed the birds that kind of bread. i do not flinch at spending $36 on a six inch cake, or $18 dollars on an overpriced sandwich every day for lunch.  i AM the one percent you are all just PEASANTS

anyway i need to go do stuff so here's the chapter this loser prepared. i made some essential changes, i hope you ungrateful pieces of dirt appreciate my genius, but i wouldn't be surprised if you don't. my brain is so immense, i am so fucking galaxy brained. 

---

raskria gasped as she saw da new student com in2 da cafeteria. dey had long blonde hair that was down 2 their butt dey wore da hottest new trend from da site dat every1 shops @ 2 buy club wear 4 da nite an then throw it out cuz its just a g strip that has sexy momma written on it in glitter which is wat da new student wuz wearing

dey were wearing a neon green g string that looped around their neck and cuped their balls lik a juggler practicing @ a birthday party hthey bounced lik som1 wuz shooting them @ da basketbal hoop 

their nipples wer out which wuz against da school dress code but raskria didnt care bcuz dat dress code wuz designed by da prepz and da karens and raskri hated both of them

they wer wearing a mask but it wasnt even covid an they wernt even wearing it right, their nose was out which wuz sooooo stupid raksria knew immediately dat they wer either anti vax and stupid or edgy and stupid bcuz exposing urself 2 covid wuz always stupid

da new kid decided to sit @ their table, their g string coconed balls straddling da metal bench

raskria said @ him w/o saying nuthing bcuz she wuz da school queen an she never aknowledged some1 b4 they aknowledged her 

"whats up" the new kid said, nodding his head

gejutel who wuznt rlly a teen he wuz a middle aged man who her dad hired as a bodyguard and chaperone but no 1 else knew that but her choked on his chocolate milk as he took in da image of da new kids outfit

her bff kei ru kracked her knuckles waiting 4 raskria 2 give her da sign 2 punch dis loser in2 da wall like she did w lotus all da time

"who da fuk r u" she askd rudly

"they call me ragare but i call myself satan"

"why" lotus asked

"becasue i tautht it wuz kool"

"Oh" lotus respondeded

"why" rozaria askeded

"idk"

"wat da fuk r u wearing!" raskria roared

"oh dis?" tickle me emo aka satan askeded as he plucked da g string lik a harmonica, "dis is the laest in fashion. dont u know?"

"dat is SO NOT DA LATEST IN FASHION" rakria screeched 

"ofc it is dont u see it on prettylittleliar?"

"dat website is only for lozers and prepz!!!!!" 

"u hav a bodyguard an a chaffeur lmao ur da prep here not me" 

"at lest i dun spend $12 on bread lik u u hore!!!"

"u dont know wat dey put in da bread. it culd be microtransmitters installed by sda govuernment to track us and record my masturbation schedulle"

"who da fuk wuld want 2 know about dat u freak!!!"

"4 ur information i have a forum dedicated just 2 my masturbation schedule an i graph it 2"

"ew" gejutel said, pushing away his spaghetii

"u just don get it bcuz ur not galaxy brained lik me but its ok bcuz i accepted a long time ago dat i was born special 2 rule over da peasants an instruct them in da ways of civilization"

"lordooo can i punch him now plsss" kei ru bagged

"get him out of my site" raskrie ordered 

"yes lordo!' kei ru etnhsuasitically replied

"yes yes!!! hit me lik i hit my kids!!!!111 dats SO sexy hang on i gotta orgasm rn"

"eww wtf????" lotus scrimed as ragare squirted his milk carton @ dem (a REAL!1111 milk carton ok u perverts!!11 don get any gross ideas dis is a PG 13 fic ok!!!!)

"LORDO IM SCARED"

"shut up rosaria ur name is not scared" raskria orderd

kei ru cried as they punched ragare out of dda window in da cafeteria an in2 space bye ragare go fulfill ur dreams of putting ur thingy in alien u kno whats