Chapter Text
“Wei Wuxian,” Jiang Cheng says, “What are these?”
Jiang Cheng stares at the three long, smooth cut stones before him. Each are of a different girth and length, and have bulbous heads of varying sizes.
“You know, tools, for our pleasure,” Wei Wuxian says, gesturing proudly at the goods he has procured.
They had been easing into the mood, before Wei Wuxian exclaimed that he suddenly remembered something, and retrieved these three sculpted stones from him qiankun pouch.
“Why are there three?”
“Well, the hawker said one should try different sizes to see how it feels. A-Cheng, the hawkers in Qinghe are really good! She gave such good advice! And I’ve never before seen such an array of products for pleasure! You should encourage more of such enterprise in Yunmeng.”
“Such enterprise only thrives because of Nie Huaisang’s explicit patronage,” Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes, “Please tell me you did not make these purchases with Yunmeng Jiang’s clarity bell hanging from your waist in full view.”
“Haha,” Wei Wuxian sketchily avoids the question, “I thought it would be fun to try this together.”
After maintaining his warning glare for another second, Jiang Cheng relents and inspects the phalluses.
The smallest is rather modestly sized, its girth just about that of two fingers.
Jiang Cheng glances at the second one and balks. It’s not big by any measure, but it’s of a size he isn’t…confident of taking. The third is definitely out of the question.
“I’ll…try this one,” Jiang Cheng says almost sheepishly, taking the smallest one.
Wei Wuxian pales slightly. “You — you can’t expect me to take the bigger one.”
At Jiang Cheng’s dry look, Wei Wuxian pales, “H-hey, Chengcheng, I already stretched you with my fingers, so this one should be okay for you, right?”
Jiang Cheng raises an eyebrow nonchalantly, “If you think it’s okay for me, then it should be okay for you,” he says, and gives Wei Wuxian a kiss on the cheek.
Wei Wuxian has given up.
His asshole is on fire and Jiang Cheng’s laugher is slowly destroying his confidence.
“I can’t do this, I really can’t, this is worse the day after eating Uncle Zhao’s super spicy volcano noodles,” Wei Wuxian declares miserably and tosses the stone phallus across the bed.
“Heh,” Jiang Cheng finally calms down enough to find his voice, “The expression on your face when the head went in,” he starts laughing again, sprawled out on his back naked.
“Poor Wei Shixiong,” Jiang Cheng teases sarcastically, picking up the other smaller stone phallus and pushing it slowly into his body.
Wei Wuxian swallows dryly as his shidi, the little fucker, spreads his legs to show Wei Wuxian how the oiled stone slips in easily, how his body accepts it.
“You stinky little brat,” Wei Wuxian mutters and clambers into the space between Jiang Cheng’s legs, smacking Jiang Cheng’s hand aside and gripping the base of the stone phallus himself.
He leans over Jiang Cheng and gives it a gentle thrust.
Jiang Cheng gasps and rolls his hips.
Wei Wuxian is unbearably hard, the tip of his cock smearing pre-cum on the inside of Jiang Cheng’s thigh.
Jiang Cheng gives him a look, heated and wide-eyed, and he is suddenly fumbling for the vial of oil somewhere, unwilling to take his eyes off Jiang Cheng. He coats his dick in the oil and lets the stone phallus slip from Jiang Cheng’s hole. It is quickly replaced by the head of his cock, nudging against the wet entrance once, twice, before he pushes until the head breaches.
“Ah!” Jiang Cheng gasps loudly, scratching four red lines down his arm. He slowly applies pressure, sinking deeper into the tight heat.
“Ah— a- A-Xian,” Jiang Cheng cries and Wei Wuxian pauses, still only halfway in.
“Does it hurt?” He asks, dropping a kiss on Jiang Cheng’s sweaty forehead. Jiang Cheng nods, an impressive blush spreading from his face all the way down to his chest.
“Hurts. Slowly,” Jiang Cheng breathes and turns his face to the side to kiss the inside of Wei Wuxian’s wrist.
“A-Xian,” Jiang Cheng gasps once more when he starts to pushing in again, and sheathed to the hilt, Wei Wuxian can feel Jiang Cheng’s body lightly trembling around his cock.
Jiang Cheng’s eyes are closed and his brows are scrunched up, any hint of his previous teasing long gone. Wei Wuxian waits as Jiang Cheng takes a few hitched breathes, slowly getting used to the feeling of being filled.
“You feel bigger than you look,” Jiang Cheng finally says, breathless and shaking.
Wei Wuxian isn’t sure what that’s supposed to mean. “Sorry,” He says dumbly.
“It’s alright,” Jiang Cheng answers as if he hadn’t just thrown a veiled insult at Wei Wuxian a few seconds prior, “Slowly.”
“You’re so warm,” Wei Wuxian mutters as he leans forward to slot their lips together. He rolls his hips tentatively, grinding forward and up into Jiang Cheng, continuing the motion with more confidence when he feels Jiang Cheng gasp into his mouth.
He pulls himself out until only the tip is left, then slowly pushes all the way back in, repeating the motion several times before switching to quicker, more shallow thrusts.
“A-Xian,” Jiang Cheng gasps again, clinging and mouthing Wei Wuxian’s neck as the other man rocks a heavy, intense pleasure into his body.
The next morning is the closing ceremony of the night hunting competition.
“What are you doing?”
Warm slick fingers side up Jiang Cheng’s thigh and up even further to press at the ache between his legs.
“Checking,” Wei Wuxian mumbles, brushing a finger over Jiang Cheng’s tender entrance, absentmindedly thinking of when Jiang Cheng’s body had been sucking his cock in last night, tight and warm and greedy.
“What nonsense,” Jiang Cheng quietly complains and shuffles away on the sheets, though Wei Wuxian has none of it and holds the other man’s hip to the bed with one hand while the other continues its almost reverent exploration.
Wei Wuxian, with great concentration, “Checking your hymen — “
“Wei Wuxian, what the hell?!” Jiang Cheng yells just as the aforementioned man dips the tip of a finger in.
“Ah!”
“Jiujiu!” They jump apart at the loud knocking on the door.
“Y-yes, A-Ling?” Jiang Cheng shouts, guiltily pulling his knees together and reaching for a discarded pair of underpants, uncaring of whose it is. “It’s still early.”
“Sorry,” Jin Ling says from outside. “I’ll wait out here.”
“Yes, just sit outside first,” Jiang Cheng replies hastily and then turns to hiss at Wei Wuxian, “Where are your clothes?”
“For the ceremony? They’re in my guest room,” Wei Wuxian answers, trying his best to cover himself with the clothes from yesterday. “I’ll go back first, I’ll see you at the ceremony.”
Jiang Cheng nods, and before he can tie his inner robe shut, Wei Wuxian captures his lips in a searing kiss, sending them both stumbling a few steps. He kisses back with equal fervour, almost lost in the moment until the terrible nephew outside speaks again.
“Jiujiu, why are Wei Wuxian’s boots outside your room? Is Wei Wuxian inside?”
Wei Wuxian can’t decide if he wants to laugh or curse.
“Wei Wuxian!!” Jin Ling yells this time, knocking incessantly on the door.
“A-Ling, come back in one ke, okay?” Jiang Cheng says sternly, letting his impatience seep into his tone of voice.
“Hmph, fine, I’ll go and look for Lan Yuan instead. He’s definitely awake.”
After a lazy morning ritual and a little bit of rimming in the tub, Wei Wuxian returns to his own room to get his ceremonial clothes and they finally make it to the banquet.
Jin Ling is beaming, receiving compliments left and right from Jin disciples and other sect leaders. It’s a very good look, especially for a young, untested sect leader. This win will go some way in building his credibility within his sect, and strengthening Lanling Jin’s position after Jin Guangyao’s disgraceful end.
“You did your sect proud, A-Ling,” Jiang Cheng says, hand heavy and reassuring on his nephew’s shoulder.
“Thank you, Jiujiu,” Jin Ling replies, face aglow. “I hope you will like my winner’s speech.”
Jiang Cheng gives Jin Ling an indulgent nod as they make their way into the banquet hall.
“Hey, did I do my sect proud? Sect Leader Jiang?” Wei Wuxian nudges his elbow from the other side, sticking close to Jiang Cheng once Jin Ling has pulled ahead.
“Shut up,” Jiang Cheng lowers his head towards Wei Wuxian and hisses, careful to keep this conversation between the two of them, “Do you want me to poke your asshole?”
“How is that a threat? I always want you to poke my asshole,” Wei Wuxian replies cheekily just as Jin Ling turns around, a question already on his lips.
Instantly, Jin Ling’s face morphs into something like intense disbelief.
“Fucking speechless,” Jin Ling says instead, his lip curled up. His question is abandoned as he leaves Wei Wuxian and a rather embarrassed Jiang Cheng to walk to the head of the hall.
“Look at A-Ling, he’s so supportive~”
“Hah.”
The congratulations pour in from various sect leaders as Jin Ling makes his way through the grand hall. Large tapestries embroidered with the Nie insignia hang from the high ceiling. At the head, Nie Huaisang sits idly on his grey stone throne.
“Thank you, everyone,” Jin Ling puts his hands together in a polite bow. “The representatives from all the sect have truly shown a high standard of cultivation. It was only by a stroke of luck that our humble Lanling Jin Sect managed to win.”
Behind him, servants and disciples bring out copious amounts of food on large trays .
“No need to be so modest,” Nie Huaisang snaps his fan close. “How about a speech and toast from the victorious Sect Leader Jin?”
“Congratulations on Hanguang-Jun on the recovery of his true husband, Mo Xuanyu!” Jin Ling blurts and downs the shot of baijiu placed in his hand as the hall breaks out in murmurs —
“— Possessed by the Yiling Laozu — “
“— Massacred his family — “
“— a real madman — “
Jiang Cheng stands up, silencing the crowd, “Mo Xuanyu has aided in the return of my martial brother and the investigation of Jin Guangyao’s crimes. Yunmeng Jiang is grateful.”
“What is the meaning of his?” Sect Leader Yao shouts, “Then where is the real Wei Wuxian?!”
“Yes, where is he?” A few other sect leaders echo, “Is Yunmeng Jiang now harbouring the Yiling Laozu?!”
“I am him,” Wei Wuxian drawls from the table behind Jiang Cheng. “Have your eyes gone bad, you bunch of old fogeys? I haven’t become that hideous, have I?”
“It is you! The Yiling Laozu!” Someone exclaims dramatically, and a wave of collective gasps follow.
Wei Wuxian rolls his eyes. Even Mo Xuanyu seems a little exasperated. Just seconds ago, these same people had been prepared to feast with the supposed Yiling Laozu in their midst, and now they act like they’re surprised.
“Open your eyes, and remember this well,” Wei Wuxian says and holds out his hand out towards the opposite side of the hall.
Next to Mo Xuanyu, Suibian trembles louder and louder against the table, and with a whoosh the sword flies out of its sheath and across the hall, right into Wei Wuxian’s palm.
Immediately, everyone but the major sect leaders puts their hands on the hilt of their swords.
“Wei Wuxian,” Jiang Cheng says, “Put that away.”
Sect Leader Yao steps forward again, “Gusu Lan is righteous and pure, and can be trusted to control your unnatural ways. What guarantee do we have that Yunmeng Jiang is capable of the same?”
Jiang Cheng clenches his jaw. Even if he cuts Wei Wuxian’s core out and lets it bleed life energy all over the floor, these people will never be happy. Yunmeng Jiang will never match up to Gusu Lan righteousness, prestige, and repute, and that is a fact Jiang Cheng has learnt not to care about anymore, because it cannot be changed.
Wei Wuxian remains silent. Although Sect Leader Yao is addressing him, what is being called into question is Jiang Cheng’s abilities, not Wei Wuxian’s obedience.
“Chenqing, the ghost flute, is to remain permanently in my care. No one henceforth shall make use of it, or its demonic powers.”
Hearing Jiang Cheng’s words, Wei Wuxian walks over to Mo Xuanyu and plucks Chenqing from his belt. Mo Xuanyu lets him. He fumbles with it while wandering back across the hall to Jiang Cheng, suddenly recalling the disaster that had befallen them all during the destruction of the Yinhufu.
He doens’t want anyone to fight anymore. He doesn’t want to cause Jiang Cheng or Yunmeng Jiang any more trouble. He just wants to go home and have a happy life.
Just as he’s about to hand Chenqing over, he raises Suibian —
— and shatters Chenqing!
The halls breaks out into chaos again.
“How could you?!” Mo Xuanyu gasps. “That is a first-grade demonic weapon!”
“I’m the one who made it, so I can decide to destroy it. It’s no big deal,” Wei Wuxian answers, returning to stand next to Jiang Cheng.
The hall is shocked into silence. The disappointment in the eyes of those minor sect leaders who wanted the flute for themselves is apparent.
Nie Huaisang takes mental note and stands up, arms spread.
“It’s settled, then! Without Chenqing, he is powerless, and shall return to Lotus Pier with my blessings! Congratulations once more to young Sect Leader Jin! All this nonsense has made me hungry, let’s stop wasting time,” With a flick of his sleeve, he disperses the tension and invites the food in.
“… I spent thirteen years caring for that flute, you know,” Jiang Cheng laments once the crowd has been settled.
“Don’t worry, Xiaocheng,” Wei Wuxian leans in to whisper in Jiang Cheng’s ear, “I know another hard piece of wood you can spend the rest of your life polishing.”
Jiang Cheng’s face twitches, but ever the sect leader, he resists the urge to smack the back of Wei Wuxian’s head.
Wei Wuxian shudders when he feels someone’s gaze on him, and turns around to see Jin Ling side-eyeing him with an impressive glare.
After the banquet has ended, Wei Wuxian returns to the guest room while Jiang Cheng speaks to the other sect leaders.
“Wen Ning,” Wei Wuxian calls. He knows Wen Ning has been following him since that first confrontation with Mo Xuanyu during the hunting competition.
“Wei Gongzi,” The shy ghost general slowly emerges from some nearby shrubbery. “I’m sorry…”
“It’s fortunate that I came back quickly enough to settle things with Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian starts, “I was so angry that day I wanted to bite your entire hand off. How could you break your promise and say those things to him?”
“I thought Mo Xuanyu was Wei Gongzi. After I’ve seen you suffer for two nights and one day transferring your golden core, how could I not stand up to him after he is so ungrateful?” Wen Ning explains, clearly flustered.
“I don’t want him to be grateful to me,” Wei Wuxian says, “Anyway, that’s all in the past. What are you going to do now? You can’t keep following me around, and you shouldn’t follow that Mo Xuanyu either.”
“O-oh. A-Yuan wants to travel to the north,” Wen Ning says, smiling as much as his dead facial muscles are able to at the thought of Lan Sizhui.
“Go with him then. Drop by Lotus Pier when you’re near Yunmeng, and bring something to apologise to Jiang Cheng. He doesn’t hate you,” Wei Wuxian says, taking a few protection talismans from his sleeve and handing them to Wen Ning.
“T-thank you, Wei Gongzi!”
Wei Wuxian bids Wen Ning goodbye and steps into the guest room. The first thing he notices are the bedsheets, which have been changed. The room has been aired and the bed curtains have been rearranged neatly after almost getting torn down by Jiang Cheng last night.
Ignoring the intense humiliation of knowing that Nie Huaisang now definitely knows, Wei Wuxian begins packing up.
Later that day, they return to Lotus Pier.
“Wei Wuxian,” Jiang Cheng says as their boat approaches Lotus Pier.
“Hm?” Wei Wuxian leans over, soft and content.
“Love you,” Jiang Cheng mutters in his ear, out of nowhere, right before getting up and hopping out of the boat onto the pier.
Jiang Cheng’s plum robes flutter behind him and the disciples at the gate bow in greeting while Wei Wuxian sits frozen under the little roof of the sanban.
That cheeky little bastard, Wei Wuxian thinks. He hastily gets up.
Bam!
Jiang Cheng turns around to find the sanban swaying hazardously, with Wei Wuxian’s lower half dangling into the water, blood flowing down from a gash on his forehead.
“Hahaha!” Wei Wuxian is smiling as he hauls the remainder of his body onto the pier and staggers to a stand. “I’m alright! I just tripped!”
“Wei Zhima, what happened?” A Jiang disciple asks, producing a kerchief from her sleeve for the blood.
“Hah,” Wei Wuxian laughs and lifts his eyes to meet Jiang Cheng’s shocked gaze from across the pier. “I just got distracted,” Wei Wuxian says absentmindedly, brushing a finger against his noise, feeling extremely warm and cozy on the inside.
One day, when the gash on Wei Wuxian’s forehead has healed, when many seasons have passed, he brings a heavy basket to Jiang Cheng just after his martial brother, lover, sect leader wraps up the morning training.
He’s been working on this for some time, combining his learnings from his own resurrection and Mo Xuanyu’s bizarre miracle mistake. When it finally succeeded, he’d been scared and excited at the same time.
“Jiang Cheng, I’ve got something for you,” Wei Wuxian says.
“Should I be concerned?” Jiang Cheng raises an eyebrow and puts Sandu aside as he approaches Wei Wuxian.
“Remember I said I'd get you new courting gifts if you didn't like them-- "
“I never said I didn't like them," Jiang Cheng says, looking pointedly at the red pendant hanging from his own waist, an addition to his Jiang clarity bell.
“That’s not what I meant,” Wei Wuxian corrects himself easily and bends down to slowly lift the lid of the basket.
Inside sits a scraggly little black dog. The dog sniffs its surroundings and slowly climbs out of the basket, its little tail wagging non-stop.
Jiang Cheng’s eyes light up in recognition, "Is this..."
"Little Sesame!"
-END-
1 month later
JC: Little Sesame is not like you at all…
WWX: What is that supposed to mean >:O
JC: He’s scared of water, he doesn’t like chasing pheasants, and he likes the smell of sect leader yao’s ass pillows…
Little Sesame: ?