Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Is Sunny alright?" Usopp asked nervously as Franky inspected the back of the ship with a serious expression.

Franky paused in his own peerings, to look at Usopp, before he offered the Sniper a sincere smile, "Ah, Usopp-bro! Don't worry. It's just like I told Luffy. The rudder is cracked, but I can have it fixed soon. This island here, has a great setup for shipwrights, this will take no time... I just also want to check on the Mast Step, and the rest of the Hull while I'm at it. Can't ever be too careful! That storm was rough... and the marines rougher!" Franky laughed as if he'd told some extreme joke, and wiped a tear from his eye. Still grinning, he reached out and clapped Usopp on the shoulder, "Go on into town. Have a little fun. Later I'll show you some shipwright stuff, okay bro?"

Usopp nodded and let out an anxious sigh. He forced a smile, and rocked from the heels of his feet to the tips of his toes, "Okay... okay. I'll bring you back something cool!"

"More cola would be good!" Franky suggested, before turning back to his examination of Sunny.

Usopp nodded, and finally tore himself away from the ship and cyborg, forcing his feet to turn towards the town of the bustling summer island the crew had found themselves docked on.

The warmth was welcoming, and the people of the island friendly. Especially, to pirates it seemed.

Luffy had been elated when they docked, and received a rather casual and warm welcome, despite their Jolly roger waving. The Straw Hats didn't always receive such a warm welcome, but these islanders seemed more than friendly enough. Some snooping around town had let the Pirates know they'd discovered a kind of tourist stop.

The island was popular to all sorts of visitors and the pirates were welcomed as if they were any other regular visitor.

It was a nice little treat to be able to dock their ship, and not have to worry about nervous townspeople, or marines being summoned to chase them off.

The stop had been a bit urgent, due to Sunny taking a nonstop beating for days from weather and pursuers alike. Franky had declared he felt it in his bones, that Sunny needed to be looked at, and Nami immediately pulled out her maps and found them this lovely spot. The island had some name, something interesting that had caught Robin's interest, but Usopp couldn't remember it now.

He was having just a bit of trouble focusing on anything, but Sunny at the moment.

While the island looked to be lovely, Usopp really couldn't help but worry about Sunny. It was like having a sick crewmate. If Sunny wasn't well, Usopp was just going to worry. Franky had said he'd heard Sunny make an abnormal sound after a big wave hit against them. This was like...

Usopp thought of a little ship swallowed up by fire. A mournful but happy voice murmuring, I wish I could have carried you further...

'No, no, no! let's get busy! Let's not think about that! Let's go into town... You wanted to make some more smoke bombs anyway so.... so that's what you're going to do!' Usopp told himself, pressing the hands to the side of his face as he willed their lost Nakama from his mind. The Sunny had Franky this time. It would not be like Merry.

It was different now.

Marching into town, Usopp tried not to feel stupid. It felt silly to still be upset about a ship, years later. Mustering as much bravado as he could, Usopp forced a grin and scanned the town, trying to take in all the shops. With as much gusto as he could pull forth, he began to look for a store that might have all the supplies he needed. 

It turned out, shopping for his smoke bomb supplies was the right distraction.

An hour later, and three shops later, Usopp had been pointed in the direction of a firework's stand.

"Try Mr. Agate, hun," A rather pretty woman who ran a grocery store had suggested, "He's a bit..." She made an uncertain face squinting as she tried to find the words. She sighed eventually and waved her hand, "I don't know. He's... glum I suppose, and haggles a lot, so watch out! You're new... he might try to overcharge ya! But he should have all the supplies you're looking for. I'm afraid we've only got the sugar and baking powder."

He had thanked her and headed off for the small stand. It was a little troubling if someone in town was warning him about a shop. But Usopp was good at haggling and seeing through lies. You can't kid a kidder, as they say...

Mr. Agate turned out to be an older man; thin and with a sallow complexion. His hair was black and pulled in a tight greasy ponytail, and he seemed the type who one might describe as a sleaze. Bags were under his dark eyes, and Usopp could understand why this man had been described as glum. He was... a little off-putting to be sure. But Usopp kept that to himself and began to list off the items he needed, "...And Potassium Chlorate, and maybe some powdered dye if you have it."

Mr. Agate frowned,  "Kid, if you're looking for ingredients for smoke bombs, why not just buy my smoke bombs. I got plenty!"

"Just the ingredients are fine, I prefer to make my own," Usopp said with a smile. A cursory peak had made Usopp wary of the quality. The stand truly didn't have much, and Usopp didn't like seeing some of the loosely bundled fireworks. It made him a little nervous about how the care for his items was being kept.

Mr. Agate frowned, seeming a little insulted by Usopp's dismissal.

Trying to smooth things over, Usopp muttered, "Besides, you know me and my pals are pirates. I'd hate for any sort of authority to trace what I use back to hear. For you see, I'm known as "God Usopp," and my tricks are so legendary... well it's landed me a following of over 8,000 men. It's best if I make my own stuff, so no one gets involved in my crimes." Usopp reached over, and pat Mr. Agate's chest, and looked him in the eye, "I'd hate to put an innocent shopkeep, like yourself, in any danger with the law..."

Mr. Agate's brow smoothed out, and he scanned Usopp up and down with a quick eye.

Finally, Mr. Agate sniffed, and turned up his nose, but went into the back of his shop, "What kinda dye you need? The color?"

"Organic powdered kind. Bright colors, and black too, if you got it," Usopp answered rocking on his feet again.

Mr. Agate turned around with several jars, and placed them in front of the Sniper, "We've got Red, and Blue in terms of color. I'm out of most else. There was a big festival last week and a lot was used up. If you come back in a few days, if you're still on the island, I'll have Yellow, Green, and Pink. I've got Black, although I must admit, it's not as dark as I would like."

Usopp grinned appreciating his honesty. This guy wasn't so bad, maybe just a little rough looking, and maybe a touch grumpy. But Usopp had certainly met worse.

Mr. Agate opened the jars, and Usopp peaked in, taking a glance at the product. The Potassium was not as white as Usopp was as accustomed to seeing. Perhaps not as refined as he would expect, but it could be fixed.

"Is there something wrong with this?" Usopp asked, trying to keep his voice light. He didn't need the store owner to start pulling back or shoo Usopp away.

Mr. Agate frowned, "Well... the quality isn't as good as I'm used to, I admit. When the shipment came in, I found it took about a third more than usual to make my standard level of smoke bombs. It's been a chore to work with. But look, you take it off my hands, and I'll cut you a deal. I can't order more unless I use it all up!"

Usopp smiled. The deal wasn't bad. And he could make this stuff work, even if the quality was low. He'd done that before too.

The pair haggled for a bit longer, but Usopp walked away with his bag full, and his coin purse not even half empty. He'd purchased enough to keep himself busy for at least several weeks. A pretty good haul if he asked him. It struck him, that maybe he should brag to Nami.

...But then again, she might try to outdo him if he bragged, and then would put interest on his debt for not doing as good as she could. Nami was good at pinching a man's wallet and especially good at keeping her own crewmates in debt! It was truly deplorable.

'Ah, think of the miser, and there she appears!' Usopp thought with a wry grin, as he spotted Nami and Sanji outside a restaurant. It looked like Sanji was trying to convince her to go inside and eat with him.

"Hey, you two!" Usopp called out, jogging forward with a grin, "Having lunch?"

"Thinking about it," Nami said with a swish of her long hair, its motion having Sanji swooning. It was a fight to resist an eye roll, but Usopp didn't need Sanji kicking him, or Nami thinking he was rolling his eyes at her.

Namie smiled at Usopp, looking a little irritated, "Be prepared to bunker down for a bit Usopp. It'll be a month before we're off this island."

"Why is that?" Usopp asked, a cold touch of dread tickling his belly.

"Franky needs at least a weak to work on Sunny," Sanji supplied, folding his arms over each other and against his chest, "And Nami says the Log Pose is unstable."

Usopp's stomach unclenched. So Sunny needed a bit of repair. That wasn't too bad.

"So, what about the Log Pose?" Usopp asked, trying not to let on how uncomfortable he was with Sunny's state.

"It seems the magnetic fields of the other islands are problematic," Nami said with a bit of tut, "If we left within the next few days I think we would be fine and I'd be able to navigate us on, but since we're stuck here, all three poses are spinning all over the place. The magnetic fields are just..." Nami brought a hand to her forehead, and rubbed it,  sighing with annoyance, "If we're here for repairs, I'm going to have to let the Log Pose reset. I'm estimating it'll take a month."

Usopp snickered, "Bet Luffy doesn't like that!"

Nami smiled, "Ah well, I told him to think of it as a vacation, and he got all excited about camping, and bug hunting, and God only knows what else!"

Sanji grinned, "I also promised to figure out something new to cook for him, which is why Nami-Swan and I are using this place as research!" He gave Usopp a look, and Usopp knew it was his cue to leave. Usopp, while he'd normally love to see Nami reject Sanji, also wasn't about to get in between the chef and the navigator, when the former was in one of his "moods," to try and woo.

"Well, you two have fun!" Usopp laughed taking a step back.

"Why not eat with us?" Nami suggested with a warm, yet sly smile, "It's on Sanji's dime."

Usopp winced internally, pitying Sanji already.

"Oh, no!" Usopp practically sang back, "I've got all sorts of new supplies to make more of my smoke bombs, and other ammo, and I'm just too busy! You both enjoy!"

Sanji shot Usopp a thumbs up, his eyes promising to reward Usopp later, and the sniper beat a hasty retreat.

Perhaps, he would get Sanji to make him a special treat. And Usopp was truthfully not up to a meal, even if it was on someone else's dime. Besides the work Usopp was dying to do, he honestly wasn't that hungry. He hadn't really had a good appetite these last few days, and his head hurt mildly. He'd mentioned it to Chopper the day before, who thought it might be allergies due to the sudden climate change in the Grand Line, as it was one to do when they went from island to island.

"Allergies maybe... but keep an eye on how you're feeling Usopp, okay?" Chopper had chided with a friendly smile.

Usopp had placed a hand over his heart, and swore on his life, and all his followers' lives. And while Usopp wasn't feeling worse, he hadn't actually been feeling that better.

Pushing his thoughts aside, Usopp hefted his bag, eager to start his project.

He could deal with his allergies, or whatever, if it actually became a problem.

It was late, when Jinbe came to get Usopp.

"Oi, Usopp!" Jinbe called, lifting an arm as he approached.

Usopp waved at him, and then fanned some of the some away from a little test burn he had been doing.

Usopp had settled himself onshore, with a portable work table. His newly purchase chemicals and powdered dyes seemed a little different than what he was used to. A little more flammable, and smokey. Potassium chlorate, was of course already extremely flammable, but this mixture was proving to be a bit of a temperamental mess.

It smoked a little too much for his liking, and Usopp worried about it bothering his crew. With that thought in mind, he'd taken a portable workbench Franky had crafted him some time ago, and settled himself outside. This way, no one would come bark at him about his experiments stinking up the place.

He didn't mind working on the island shore, instead of his workshop. It was, on occasion, fun to work outdoors when the opportunity presented itself. But still... it was annoying to work with shoddy supplies.

"Working off ship today, Usopp?" Jinbe asked, holding both his large hands out in a friendly manner.

"Yup, yup," Usopp grunted, standing up stiffly. He placed his hands in the small of his back and stretched, his bones creaking audibly, "Just having a change of pace."

"Well, dinner is soon. Sanji is trying his hand at a local dish he thinks we will all like. He asked for me to come out here and get you," Jinbe explained. He pointed at Usopp's items, "May I help you pick this all up?"

Usopp began packing away the more delicate items into their cases and jars, and then nodded at Jinbe, "Yeah, I would appreciate that!"

"A bit of a chemist, are we?" Jinbe asked, looking curious and amused.

"Oh, yeah. Best on my island you know! I once created a pesticide that not only wiped out the caterpillars munching the island's precious tomato plants, but as a side effect, the pesticide worked as a great... uh fertilizer! Yeah, that's it... And it grew the tomatoes to be the size of great large beach balls!" Usopp boasted. He put all his delicate items in his bag, and then winked at Jinbe, "They were extra tasty, too!"

Jinbe gave Usopp an indulgent smile, and crowed, "Oh, my goodness Usopp! That is very impressive!"

Usopp rubbed under his nose, and placed the other hand on his hip, "I'll stick with my Pop Greens, of course, but there's nothing like-"

The ground beneath his feet, felt like it was moving.

Usopp had just enough time to open his eyes before he was caught in one of the Fish-Man's arms.

Jinbe was looking down at Usopp in surprise, while Usopp could only blink up in confusion.

Had he... fallen?

"Usopp are you alright?"

"Uhm... what happened?" Usopp sputtered, allowing Jinbe to put him back on his feet.

"I was hoping you would tell me," JInbe said, a sturdy hand on Usopp's back, "You stilled and just... pitched over."

Usopp blinked, and rubbed a hand to the back of his neck. The rubbing motion caused spots to dance before his eyes, and made his vision blur. He stilled his hand, and closed his eyes taking in a slow breath.

"Usopp?" Jinbe rumbled, his voice low and edged with an authoritative concern.

"Sorry, Jinbe. I wasn't feeling well earlier... I guess I just got real dizzy for a second," Usopp finally answered.

"Does Chopper know about how you're feeling?" Jinbe asked,  keeping a stern but concerned eye on his younger crewmate.

Usopp waved a hand at him, "No. Yes. I mean, Yeah. He knows. We thought the pressure change from entering into this summer island was messing with my allergies." Usopp tapped his nose very gently, "She's a beaut, but she's delicate."

Jinbe arched a brow, "Why did you say no, at first?"

"Well... Chopper knows about me having a headache, but being dizzy is new," Usopp admitted, not really ready to make something up to his newest crewmember. Usopp held up both his hands, "I did talk to him about how I was feeling earlier, I swear."

There was a stretch of silence, and finally, the corner of Jinbe's mouth quirked up, "Well... perhaps you should tell Chopper about this little dizzy spell as well, hmm?"

Usopp waved a hand, "Yes, yes... but I'm probably just hungry! I skipped lunch. I get like that when I get absorbed in my work!" Usopp reached for his workbench, but Jinbe stopped him.

Jinbe folded the portable table up with an easy snap, and then placed a free hand on Usopp's back, "Oh, no my friend. I got this. Let's get you inside and fed... and then you'll tell Chopper about your little stumble, yes?"

Usopp grinned, and rolled his eyes, "Yes, I'll tell Chopper. But it's nothing! I'm probably just hungry! I'll have you know, I've never been sick a day in my life! " He pressed a thumb into his chest, all smiles, and began marching with Jinbe back to the Sunny, "We'll tell Chopper, but really. I'm fine. Just fine."

Chapter Text

He was sleeping.

He wasn't sure how he knew he was sleeping, but he was.

A peal of breezy laughter floated in the air, light and soft, but somehow still able to cut through any noise. A laugh, which Usopp had not heard the likes of sense...

Ah.

There it was.

That was why he knew it was a dream.

It was her laughter.

Her.

His mother only existed in dreams.

Feelings and colors clarified; sounds smoothed out and settled into something understandable, and then the scene came into clarity.

Banchina, his perfect mother, was skipping down a hill. Not just any hill, but the hill below Usopp's family home. Syrup Village. This was Syrup village. He was home, no... no he was not home. He was just... remembering, or dreaming, or both, as the case was. He focused on his mother, her back so recognizable. From her strong posture, to her thin limbs, and her charming large hands which she used to make food, or make pottery, or when she was feeling especially industrious...

Mix chemicals.

She'd been a chemist, or something like it when he was a child. She even had a shed in the back, behind their house, that she used to mix all sorts of things together in. She had even taught him how to mix smoke bombs. There was a lot Usopp had gotten from his father... but there was a lot he'd gotten from his mother too. Usopp pulled himself back to the scene; back to his mother.

She hummed a tune as she skipped down the hill. One that Usopp hadn't thought about in a long time, but recognized immediately. Her hands were behind her back, one clasping her wrist loosely as she skipped and hummed, a few words slipping out as she half sang:

"As the son of a son of a sailor
I went out on the sea for adventure...

...As a dreamer of dreams and a travelin' man
I have chalked up many a mile..."

She did not sing the whole song, she stuck with humming mostly, seemingly only singing out her favorite parts or the song. But when she got to the chorus, her half meandering, half humming voice rose up, and she belted it out:

"Son of a son, son of a son
Son of a son of a sailor
Son of a gun, load the last ton
One step ahead of the jailer!"

Behind her, screaming more than singing, a small child's voice echoed her. It was him. Little him.

He turned, or at least the scene shifted and then, a small boy, no more than five came running after his mother, tearing down this hill at a speed too fast for the slope. He was belting out the chours too, eyes alight with delight as he thought of his father. The boy kicked up his heels when he got to, 'Ahead of the jailer,' and Usopp winced, knowing what would happen next. Little Usopp... tripped. And then, in a spectacular display of flailing, Little Usopp tumbled down, end over end, moving like a wild wheel down the hill, until his mother had stepped in front of him and caught him. Her face had been terrified during the moment, but now that she'd managed to stop the little boy's stumble, it smoothed out into a mask of calm.

She knelt to the ground, settling the little boy down about her lap, and in a soft voice asked, "Usopp! Are you alright?"

Little Usopp was shaking, half from fear, and the rest, from pain. The tumble had been quite dramatic, and would only get worse. Little Usopp hadn't seen it yet, but Usopp's knee was bleeding, and where it wasn't bleeding, it was scaped up raw, this skin stinging and irritated red.

Usopp, all grown up now, and nearing his twenties, still had the scar from this fall.

Banchina's eyes were on it, and she frowned with deep concern, and then Little Usopp spotted the injury. His eyes flooded with tears, and he took in a gulping breath---

But Banchina clapped her hands dramatically, and shouted, "Banchina... SPELL!!" She bellowed the word with a dramatic flourish, and then closed her eyes in deep concentration, and wiggled her fingers.

Little Usopp's head snapped to his mother, caught in rapt attention. Tears were still spilling down his cheeks, but his wail had been halted.

With an exaggerated grab at the air around Usopp's knee, and in a completely serious voice, Banchina began to chant, "Pain, Pain, fly away! Come again some other day!" She chanted these words over and over, each time her voice growing louder, more fervent, and more dramatic until she made a huge throwing motion, and tossed an unseen heavy load away from her son. Little Usopp sniffled and clapped for his mother's performance, and while he clapped, she removed a scarf from her neck and quickly tied it to his leg.

"Did that help?" She asked, still focusing on his bloodied knee.

"Yes," Little Usopp whispered, wincing as she tightened her makeshift bandage, "It still hurts."

"Yes... I think it will a little while yet!" Banchina whispered seriously, "You had a very big fall!" Once his knee was tied up, she scooped him up into her arms, and turned back towards the hill, "I shall have to cast more spells, but Usopp, you did very well! Brave boy!"

Little Usopp wrapped his arms around her, and buried his face in her neck. She was hurrying on up the hill, where she would treat his knee, but it would still scar.

Usopp, the big one who was watching his younger self with envy, knew this to be true. Absently, he touched the pant leg, knowing under it was the slightly hooked raised scar. As a child, he used to draw on it, and turn it into a yawning crocodile's mouth.

This was a nice dream. A nice memory to have. But it was sweet agony. Nice to see his mother... terrible to know that when he woke up... she would be gone.

He couldn't recall the last time he had dreamed of his mother.

As she reached the top of the hill, she paused, and turned around.

It was as if the distance between them had faded away. She stared at him. A young mother staring into her adult, or at least something like it, son's face. In reality, she'd never know his aged face, but she was looking now. Maybe she could see it, and know it.

Usopp stood a little straighter, puffed up his chest, and held out his arms. Would she like what she saw? Be proud of it? Even recognize it?

"Wh-what do you think?" He stammered. He hadn't meant to stammer.

Banchina looked him up and down appraisingly, in the way Robin might look at an ancient item, and then she whispered, "Wake up Usopp."

He blinked.

That was not her voice.

Banchina opened her mouth again, and Zoro's angry voice emerged, "Oi! Usopp! Wake up!"

Usopp took in a ragged breath, startled into alertness. No. No, he was not startled into alertness, he was terrified into it. He was thrust, terrifyingly into alertness, and even screamed as the hands at his shoulders, clamped harder.

"Ah! Come on Usopp! Shut up!" Zoro barked, shaking Usopp once more.

Usopp took in a deep breath, and coughed, choking on the scream he'd been about to let loose. When he managed to catch his breath, he rubbed his eyes. Looking about, Usopp felt confused by his place of sleep. This was not the men's room, nor was it his workshop.

"Where....?" He began to question and then stopped. He knew where he was. The answer had suddenly popped into his head.

This was the crow's nest, and he had been on duty. He... had slept on duty... and been awoken by Zoro.

Oh, no!

Even though they had been docked at Marah (The name of the island, which Robin liked quite a lot for some historical reason Usopp could not recall) for over a week, Zoro had insisted they still keep up their night watch routine. There'd been a few begrudging moans, but everyone had agreed. Seemingly, nice tourist location or not, the Straw Hats needed to be vigilant. They were all wanted people after all.

And Usopp had fallen asleep on his watch, a huge slight by the crew's, first mate's, standards.

Zoro crossed his arms and glared, letting Usopp know he was due for a lecture. And then probably a punishment, in the form of some workout routine.

And any other day, Usopp would agree. He took watch very seriously. He had never fallen asleep at watch, well, at least not since his Sabaody days, where the care of the group's well-being seemed to be taken a little more seriously overall. And Zoro, despite how often he napped, never fell asleep on watch, and was not one to let it go if any one else happened to fall asleep on a watch. Even Chopper had gotten a stern scolding from Zoro when the little doctor had fallen asleep, and Zoro was soft on him plenty.

Any other day-Usopp would accept a scolding from Zoro, and he'd whine, but he'd accept a punishment too.

But today was different.

He had dreamt of his mother and seen her with such aching clarity. Because of that, Usopp couldn't bear to be yelled at, scolded, or punished today. He needed to go hide, and... and... and something. Mourn maybe? But he needed to do something, and he needed to do it alone.

Remembering his mother was as painful as it was wonderful, and for the momentary joy he got in having that dream, his day was now ruined. Zoro needn't punish him... he was punished enough.

Because now he was back in a reality where she was dead and gone.

And it was such a bitter thing, worse than any pain Zoro could give him.

And so, with a bit of tremor to his voice, Usopp got up and muttered, "I recognize I fell asleep, and that was wrong, but I can't be yelled at just now."

Zoro raised an eyebrow and scoffed, "What was that?"

Usopp grit his teeth, but forced himself to unclench and relax his jaw. Not meeting Zoro's eye Usopp cleared his throat and said louder, "I was wrong for falling asleep, there's no excuse for that. But lecture me tomorrow-"

"So you admit to being in the wrong, but want to weasel out of the punishment?" Zoro snapped, talking over Usopp.

Usopp rubbed his head, a vein in his brow pulsing. His head hurt. His heart hurt. The scar on his knee, long recovered, hurt.

"Not now, Zoro," Usopp muttered, trying to get himself back into the present. Trying to readjust to being motherless. Why did it still have to hurt so much, years later? Why did tears still prickle at his eyes?

"What?" Zoro growled, his eyes narrowing as he tried to take on a frightening countenance.

But Usopp couldn't do with it today. He brushed past Zoro, and without a word, began to descend the rigging.

That was the wrong move apparently because Zoro was soon descending after him, making a scene. Shouting his name over and over, and demanding for Usppp to stop. Usopp did stop, when his feet hit the deck, his teeth grit hard, and his head throbbing as Zoro continued to yell. The rest of the crew was looking from their own positions, and a few were starting to drift towards the scene, clearly curious as to what was going on.

"Do you think you can just walk away from this?" Zoro barked out when he was on deck. But he did not stop when his feet hit the deck, he kept walking, shoving his chest against Usopp's and glaring into the Sniper's eyes when he, at last, looked up.

Usopp had not been expecting the contact, and when he was met by Zoro's chest, he pressed back, surprising himself by doing it. Zoro too, looked surprised.

And it was probably Usopp pressing back against the riled-up Zoro that had Sanji calling out, "Oi! Moss-head! What are you doing over there to Usopp?"

Sanji's face was set in a protective frown, and he was stomping over, Luffy already ahead of him, although he only looked interested at the scene, and not upset.

"Usopp," Zoro spat, poking a hard finger to Usopp's bare chest, "Fell asleep on watch."

Sanji's eyebrows shot up, and he set his mouth in a hard line. He didn't have anything to say to defend Usopp, but his face said he clearly didn't like Zoro being so angry about it.

Usopp's head throbbed more, now embarrassed and ashamed to have the whole crew hear his missive.

"Usopp fell asleep?" Luffy asked, coming to stand near his First mate and Sniper. His voice held that innocence it usually did, but it had an edge. An edge that he was listening in now as a Captain, and not as a friend.

Usopp swore under his breath, shoulders sagging. This day was turning out into a real mess, "I know. I know I fell asleep. It was wrong. And I'll take full responsibility-"

"You'll take it, now!" Zoro snapped, "Not tomorrow, or not later when you feel like it!" He jabbed Usopp several more times with his finger as if driving a point into Usopp.

Usopp's jaw was beginning to hurt from how hard he was gritting his teeth, and Zoro's last jab, actually made Usopp stagger.

"Oi! Marimo, quit being a prick!" Sanji snapped, making a move to walk forward, but Luffy held out his hand and stopped the irate cook.

"If Usopp fell asleep, he needs to get scolded," Luffy said his tone cool but authoritative in that way that only Luffy could manage. He was staring unblinkingly at Zoro and Usopp, peeling back the layers of the scene, assessing something Sanji could not. There was something suspicious in Luffy's gaze, like he had an idea forming, but wasn't quite sure of it yet.

"This isn't about me trying to avoid responsibility-" Usopp tried to say, his chest hurting as his anger built. His heart was rattling inside his chest, and it felt like a panic attack was brewing inside of him.

"Pain, Pain, fly away!" His mother sang in his ear.

"You, will stand there and listen to me!" Zoro said folding his arms, his voice leaving no more room for argument, "You fell asleep on watch, which is as stupid as it is dangerous. Anyone could have picked you off, or snuck on the ship and picked us off! Your life, and our lives are in your care when you are on watch. And do you know how terrifying it was for me to wake up to the dawn? I had third watch! You were supposed to change out with me, and so when I woke up, I thought something had happened to you! I thought you were hurt, or sick, or anything but asleep on the job!"

"Come again some other day!" Usopp's mother sang.

Usopp, whose head was barely lifted as it was, sagged downwards. His head was pounding. His mother was still dead. He had made a mistake, but could Zoro just wait? His mother had been long dead. It shouldn't still hurt. His heart felt too small in his ribcage. It was tight. Why did Zoro have to chew him out in front of everyone? Couldn't he wait. Just a little while longer? He was so embarrassed already, so ashamed, he was not his mother's brave boy.

"Usopp!" Zoro barked for attention.

"Hey..." Sanji began to talk, his hand reaching for Zoro's shoulder, "Stop! I think-"

"Usopp!" Luffy breathed, voice sure, and eyes knowing something, in the way he always knew, "Do you feel sick?"

Usopp lifted his pounding head to look at his Captain, confused by the question. Looking at Luffy took a strange amount of effort, and it made Usopp's head hurt worse. He squinted at his Captain, confused by his change of voice, when a loud, heavy wet sound caught his ear.

The deck went silent, and the air got heavy.

Usopp looked down at the deck below his feet. A startling large amount of blood was at his feet, and there were clumps in it. Great big clots were in the wet puddle, and Usopp cringed in disgust taking half a step back. It was then, he realized the blood was coming from his nose, as his movement caused his still dripping nose to be at the right angle to drip onto his chest. This was not the only problem. That half a step back, had also thrown off his equilibrium, and he was falling.

"Usopp!"

He was falling... but everything has already gone white anyways so... so...

Oh.

Usopp was unconscious.

Chapter Text

It was nothing.

Nothing!

Nothing.

"It's nothing!"

"It's not nothing!"

Chopper slammed his hoof down on his desk and pointed a clipboard at Usopp, "Yes, there is no fever. Yes, initial tests show you are healthy, but... But! You don't have a severe nose blood, and then faint! That, is not nothing!"

"...Sanji gets nosebleeds..." Usopp muttered, fiddling with the comforter of his sickbed.

Everything Chopper was saying, was true. He had fainted. After falling asleep on watch. After getting scolded. After causing a scene. After snapping, at Zoro, or all people! ...His nose had bled, and he had fainted. It was a lie to say it was nothing. But it... what in the world could it have been?

"You're not Sanji, and I'm still not sure how he gets those nosebleeds like that!" Chopper snorted, tapping his chin as he began to mutter, "The way it propels him! And the amount! That's a mystery too!"

"It's not a mystery Chopper, he's just a pervert," Usopp snorted, running his fingers over the seem of the comforter. It wasn't perfectly stitched. 'Tch, what low quality. I could sew better! Hope we didn't pay much for this.' Usopp thought despairingly. He had had to pinch pennies often when he was growing up alone. He wouldn't have bought this, shoddily sewn, sham of a blanket!

"Sanji aside-you are not him after all, you shouldn't have a nosebleed like that! That's not right! Not healthy!" Chopper slammed his clipboard down angrily against his desk and crossed his arms, "Initial tests show nothing, but-"

"Initial!? You're going to do more?" Usopp cried, pulling the comforter taught in his grasp. Ugh. The seam was so crooked! And... Oh Lord... had they used black thread to sew up a white comforter? They should have at least used a Ladder stitch!

"Yes!" Chopper bleated, clearly exasperated, "You bled, a lot, and out of nowhere! And then! Then... you fainted! And before that, you fell asleep on watch... you haven't done that in... well, since we all got back together! I should do more tests!" Chopper sat himself down in his chair and glared out at Usopp, "However, you know your body, and your family's medical history more than I. And there is no fever... So If there is something you need to tell me, like diseases common in your family line, or if there is something you've been doing that could have caused this... I'd like to know now. That will make testing easier."

Chopper was still speaking.  Something about diseases running in families, or overwork straining the body... but Usopp was thinking of his mother.

How she had shown him how to sew. How to cut little neat patches out of fabric, and add them to rips in his clothes. Money had been tight on occasion, but he was sure she had explained sewing to him to keep him busy. He had been a high-strung little kid. Full of energy he needed to burn.

...What had she died of?

He was so little when it happened, he didn't remember the name of what had taken her. Or did the local doctor even tell him?

Did he even know?

What were her symptoms?

Aching. Tired. Headaches. Nausea. Fever. Vomiting. Diarrhea. Fainting. Dizzyness. Hallucinations...?

Maybe, it was hallucinations... but there was... there was that time in the kitchen. She'd been muttering to herself. Something... what had she said?

"He's not here," Banchina had whispered while staring out a window of their kitchen, "He's not here. He's not. He's not. He's not. Get a grip. You have to do this. You have to do this!" In rhythm with her hurried words, she slapped the palms of her hands against her cheeks. "You have to do this! Keep it together, keep it together!" She slapped her cheeks again, and pushed her palms against her cheeks, and pushed her hands back to her ears. She pulled her skin tight, tight, tight... and Usopp remembered she did this when she panicked.

It used to scare him.

He would be older when he realized his mother would pull her face taught in an effort to keep herself from crying.

Banchina never liked to cry.

"M-Mommy?" Usopp had whispered, and she'd turned, dropping her hands quickly.

"Oh! Usopp... what is it, my little love? What do you need?" She asked, her voice light and attentive.

She smiled and then coughed.

It had been loud and sudden, like an explosion.

She'd covered her mouth with her handkerchief, and it went from white to red. She pulled it from her face... and there had been a smear from her lips to her nose. Usopp had screamed...

"...was it from her nose or mouth?" Usopp muttered to himself, inadvertently speaking while Chopper talked.

"What?" Chopper questioned.

"What?" Usopp echoed.

He'd forgotten that Chopper had been speaking to him.

"You... said something?" Chopper lightly prodded.

Usopp shook his head, fingers dancing over the edge of the haphazardly sewn edge of the comforter, "No, No... just trying to think if things have been different." Usopp cleared his throat, "Uh... actually I have thought perhaps my allergies were bad-"

"Yes, I remember you had that headache as we drew near the island," Chopper nodded, "And there was that dizzy spell Jinbe told me about, that you forgot to mention," Chopper said giving Usopp a stern look.

Usopp sunk into his shoulders, "Oh... oh yeah. I... I meant to tell you,"

Chopper snorted, his ears twitching with agitation, "Well, we can start with an allergy test tomorrow, but I'd like you to rest more for today. But there are some other tests we can do..."

Usopp chewed on his lower lip, "Do I really need to do those other tests?"

"Yes!" Chopper immediately snapped, "If you don't have an idea of what's wrong, we need more tests-"

"But what if I have an idea?" Usopp interrupted, touching a snag in the stitching of the crooked seam. He plucked at it until he created a hole in the comforter, and then muttered a soft apology. Bad quality or not, it was wasteful to ruin it. He would fix it later.

"You have an idea?" Chopper pressed, sounding a little impatient.

'Not really,' Usopp thought, but with a sheepish grin Usopp lied, "Maybe I've been overworking."

Usopp's hands stilled over the hole he had created on his blanket. Overworking. Just saying the word... well. That didn't feel like a lie, not that he had said it. Maybe, he had been overworking!

"Overworking?" Chopper echoed, his tone flat and unamused. He would need more of an explanation before he just accepted what Usopp was suggesting to him.

"Well, since we came to this island I've been busy with my smoke bombs, and my pop greens, and this and that..." Usopp began, keeping his eyes on his fumbling hands, trying to come up with any sort of evidence to support his claim, "I mean... well, I've missed lunch a few times..." Usopp paused.

Oh... that was it. He had missed lunch. Several times. He hadn't been very hungry lately, and so... Usopp hadn't been paying too much attention to his meals.

Now, looking Chopper in the eye, Usopp continued, "I've missed lunch a  lot lately... since we've come to this island. Breakfast too. really... I've only been eating at dinner when it's been a group meal."

And all of this was true.

When the crew docked, especially for long periods of time, the crew was normally allowed to wander off on their own and fend for themselves. Breakfast was always served, as was lunch and dinner, but Sanji only hunted you down for dinner. On a new island, sometimes there was just too much to explore, and Sanji would allow the others to fend for themselves, rather than drag them to the dinner table. Not that he had to drag anyone... his food was too good!

But on an island, on the rare occasion the group got to relax, he didn't have set meals, or make sure every single person was fed. Only at dinner was it still insisted upon, that everyone ate together. Usopp normally snacked more on times like this... but... this time, Usopp hadn't been. he'd been tinkering on his ammo and other little invention ideas. As well as sketching. And wandering the island too. Oh, and he had been working on Kabuto's line of sight. And checking on his newly sprouting Pop Greens.

Meals had just... gone by unnoticed, and without him.

"You have been working a lot from what I've seen," Chopper finally spoke up, "And missing meals is bad... but I... Oh..." Chopper's face lit up, and then his eyes great a little misty. With a very soft expression, Chopper readjusted himself in his seat, and cleared his throat, "Franky mentioned to me in passing you've been worried about Sunny. Has that been weighing on your mind?"

Usopp blushed, 'Geeze. Jinbe, and now Franky? How many people have been tattling on me!?'

"Usopp... Franky... Franky will keep Sunny safe," Chopper said keeping his voice gentle, "Don't worry..."
Usopp shook his head. It was not the time to be embarrassed, especially since Usopp didn't think he had been that worried. But now that Usopp wasn't sure he was lying anymore... maybe he had been very worried about Sunny... maybe that had been the cause of his sudden lack of appetite. So slowly he said, "I... I have been worried. Maybe I was keeping myself busy to distract myself from it."

Chopper nodded, and his shoulders sagged as tension began to fade, "While rare... it is possible to get a bad nosebleed from exhumation, overwork, and stress. You do have evidence for all three. So here is what we're going to do. You're going to stay here for two days, rest, and eat more high caloric foods that I will have Sanji make. We will go on ahead with the allergy test, but if after some rest, and if you don't have another nosebleed, I can relent about more tests."

Chopper pointed a hoof at Usopp's face, which had perked up, "But you will be eating three meals under my watch, and I will be requesting for Sanji to make you suitable meals to assist in your recovery! And Usopp, I mean it! If this looks to be something else, we're doing more tests!"

"I'll rest Chopper! I'll rest!" Usopp said with a quick head nod, "I swear!" And as if to prove his point, Usopp flopped into bed and tugged the comforter up under his chin. Some of the stuffing of the comforter was now starting to peak from the blanket from how Usopp had messed with it. 'If it had been made well in the first place, that wouldn't have happened!' Usopp thought with a snort, while also mentally planning out a decent fix for the blanket.

Really... his fidgety hands were a nuisance!

Chopper got up with a nod, "Good, I'll go tell the others. They've all been really worried."

"It's not like I was out long," Usopp sighed.

"True, It's not even been an hour since you fainted, and you woke up almost as soon as you were dropped off in here... but it was still very alarming. Please, trust Franky to care for Sunny, and don't worry. Trust me too!" At Chopper's plea, Usopp hung his head with guilt. Chopper continued talking, even as he headed for the door that led to the deck, where their anxious crew was waiting for news,  "I'm going to talk to Sanji-"

Usopp reached out, and grasped the tail of Chopper's white doctor's coat, "Wait Chopper... don't tell him I've been skipping meals!"

"Usopp-" Chopper began, his expression turning disdainful, but Usopp spoke over him quickly, his words almost blending together in his rush.

"I just don't want Sanji to blame himself! He'll take total responsibility for me skipping meals! I promise I'll eat better, and anything he thinks I should have... even... even mushrooms if it comes to it!" Usopp closed his eyes with a shudder, "But... please don't tell him. Please."

Chopper sighed, and nodded, "I see... yes. Yes, I understand... Sanji takes everyone's meals very seriously. Alright... I can keep that you've been skipping meals from Sanji, for his sake. But I will say you've been overworking and stressed about Sunny, and that your appetite has been weak. He needs to know something if he's to cook for you, and help you recover! And Usopp?"

"Yes?"

"It really is just that, right? There's nothing else you think it could be?" Chopper asked tilting his head so he could look Usopp in the eye.

Usopp thought of his Mother in bed.

Of her painful coughs, and terrible wheezing breaths.

Of a little song, he used to sing for her.

"Pain, pain, fly away. Fever, fever, go away. Come again some other day."

Those words never worked.

Not for him.,

Not for his Mother.

The pain didn't go. The fever didn't break. Pirates never came.

Usopp smiled, and settled more into his bed, "I've just been stressed and overworked! It's fine Chopper!"

In the end, it was announced Usopp needed bed rest, and should not be disturbed for two or so days.

...Which with this crew... well... Usopp was flooded with visitors throughout the whole first day of bed rest. The very instant they could, they were at his bedside.

Jinbe had been Usopp's first visitor.

He had sat down at Usopp's bedside, and fixed him with a stern look. He had not started with harsh words, but rather a very serious, "I'm sorry." Usopp had been startled at first, but Jinbe continued with, "I'm sorry that I did not drag you to Chopper when I saw you sway. My words must have been said to gently, to calmly." Jinbe fixed Usopp with a stern gaze, "Instead, I should have delivered you straight to Chopper! You are a valuable member of this crew... and more than that. My friend. You must take care of yourself... and as your elder, I should help you when you forget, or when you brush things off. I will not make that mistake again."

Usopp had never felt so guilty in his life! He had never gotten a scolding like this, one that said he was cared about, but one that also scolded him. It was... a little uncomfortable, but nice too. No... maybe not nice? No--it was nice!! No... No, this was confusing!

Eventually, mid-lecture, Usopp finally interrupted Jinbe and muttered, "Listen... shouldn't I take care of myself on my own? You're not responsible for my welfare."

Jinbe nodded, "No, it is not my responsibility... it is my privilege. One should look after those they care for. I am the newest here... I'll admit to that. I don't know your habits yet... but I want to be more honest when I am worried about you, or anyone on this crew. I want to be better friends... and I want you to be healthy. Please... do take care of yourself and don't push too hard."

'Yes... yes, it's nice,' Usopp had at last decided.

Being cared for, was very nice. As always. Even when scolded.

Of course, Jinbe was just the start of the flood.

Franky was next, wailing and crying about Usopp-bro having a gentle, kind, and somehow manly heart. "You worried about a ship so much that you made yourself sick, Bro! That's... that's so sweet and cool.... and... and..." And then the Cyborg cut off his tears, and growled, "And dumb! You can't get sick worrying by yourself! Idiot! I won't let you! Who is the best shipwright around, huh? And who is my best assistant? Huh!? My assistant can't make himself sick!" He had then shaken Usopp---which had led to Chopper screeching, and then booting the Cyborg out.

Franky had called one last, "Get better bro, and don't carry your problems on your own!" Before Chopper had literally thrown Franky ourside and slammed the door, his chest heaving despite being in his heavy point mode.

Robin had followed next, Chopper probably allowing her entry since Robin tended to be a calmer presence.

And she was this time too. She visited briefly, calmly tucking the blankets around Usopp's shoulders and asking him a few questions on how he felt, and then offering to read stories to him before bed each night. "I'm not a child," Usopp had muttered to her, and she had smiled, her eyes twinkling with mystery and amusement, and answered him with a question, "But don't you wish to return to being one every now and then?"

He had been silent, and she squeezed his shoulder gently adding, "It's nice to be doted on when you're not feeling well... Don't you agree?"

She'd left on her own, promising to visit at night every day he was kept in bed.

Brook had barged in around lunchtime, sobbing and throwing himself against Usopp dramatically. It had been with enough force to make Usopp squawk in anger, "You're so boney!"

"Tha's because I'm all bones!" Brook had sobbed, before cackling despite his tears and shrilling out, "Ah! Skull joke!"

"Is that a joke, of just fact!?" Usopp huffed, pushing the sobbing skeleton off him, as Brook continued to shriek and fuss.

"Usopp! I will craft you a song! It will help you recover and feel better. It will be a masterpiece!"

Brook continued on like that until Usopp gave an exasperated, "Okay, okay!"

Chopper then waggled a hoof at Brook, and snapped, "You're too noisy! Get out Brook!"

Brook sniffed loudly, and blew his nose into the white sheet of the bed next to Usopp, and promised, "It will be not just one song... but an album! A concert! You will be the shining example of health by the time I'm done, just you wait and see!" He might have said more, but Chopper was so angry about Brook blowing his nose into the once clean sheet, he wrapped the skeleton up in it, and tossed him outside.

Nami had been the last to visit on the first day, excluding Robin who did return with a bedtime story. Nami plopped herself in a seat, a meal from Sanji in her hands. She explained she was the one bringing it, because Sanji was making a mad dash around the island looking for more ingredients to provide Usopp with a more nutritious, and calorie-dense meal.

"Everyone was very worried when you collapsed like that," Nami said matter of factly, leveling Usopp with a hard stare, "How come on an island, where we get a break from Luffy picking fights, where we have a chance to relax... you manage to collapse from exhaustion?! How do you manage to overwork yourself when we're meant to have a good time!?"

Usopp shrank into his shoulders, "Ah, Nami! I didn't mean to-"

"It doesn't matter if you meant to!" She snapped, crossing her arms in a huff, "You still collapsed! And the blood! You can't bleed while we're having a vacation! I ought to fine you! Or raise the interest on what you already owe me!"

"No! Nami! Are you trying to kill me! I won't get better if you threaten me!" Usopp began to wail, but cut himself off as Nami suddenly leaned in towards him, her nose bumping against his.

She stared him down, until he had broken in a cold sweat, and then she nodded, "I won't fine you, or increase your interest... but the deal is, you can't do something like this again! You've never passed out like that before! Fainting from fright is one thing, but collapsing from exhaustion..." Nami frowned hard, and settled herself back in her seat, giving Usopp more breathing room, "You have to look after your health Usopp! Do you understand me?"

He nodded, and she sighed, "Good... now..." She pointed at the tray of food, Usopp had almost forgot about, "You better eat all that."

And he did, Nami, and Chopper watching him with a careful eye. When he went to bed, it had been a relief. The first day of rest... had not been restful. Not all!

But the second day... the second day was worse.

Sanji greeted Usopp with breakfast, his face was full of anxiety and concern. There were bags under his eyes and he looked grim as he handed Usopp the tray.

"Sanji, did you get any sleep? You look..." Usopp had started to let his mouth run away from him, but Sanji's tired, and anxiety-riddled expression caused his words to dry up.

There was an awkward pause of silence, and then Sanji was fully inside the cabin, and extending the tray to Usopp. Usopp accepted the tray, taking note of a bowl of some sort of porridge, sprinkled with fruit, oats, and honey. There was a glass of juice, and water, as well as a small plate of seared ham, and toast with an egg. A hearty meal indeed, and it smelled wonderful.

"Thank you, Sanji! This looks great!" Usopp said, honestly really admiring the food. He smiled, hoping his gratitude would somehow satisfy some of Sanji's concern.

"This is my fault!" Sanji blurted, sitting down next to Usopp's bedside, his legs bending gracefully, even as he flopped into the chair.

"It's not!" Usopp snapped harshly, his worries about Sanji's guilt seeming to be coming true.

"You weren't eating enough! I should have noticed!" Sanji snapped back, shaking his head, "If I'm going to serve this crew, I need to make sure they're eating well! Cleaning their plats! I should have been paying more attention!"

"Sanji, you know how I can be! I got busy tinkering!" Usopp argued, "I've been working on my smoke bombs and with no one hassling us... I just lost track of time!"

"Exactly! I know how busy you can be! I always drag you to your meals when you forget, but I slacked off once we got to the island!" Sanji shook his head, his face crumpled with shame, "That was terrible of me. I was too worried about... about taking Nami-swan to that restaurant! And what a waste that had been," Sanji sighed making a face, "They couldn't even make a decent dinner roll!"

"No! Sanji... you can't be the sole blame for me being careless. I neglected my meals... and that was my fault. I'm sorry! Please don't be hard on yourself!" Usopp pleaded, and brought his bowl to his face "All your food is so good, and I'll eat all right now." And with Luffy-like speed, Usopp began to scoop the meal Sanji brought him, quickly into his mouth. It was warm, but the flavor was dulled. Perhaps because it was meant to be a healthier meal.

Still, dull or not, it was Sanji's food. So it was delicious.

Sanji chuckled sadly, and shook his head, "I get lax when we visit islands for extended periods of time. I Prepare large snacks and let everyone graze... But I won't anymore. I want all your bellies to be full, and your energies high. I will take this more seriously."

Choking, Usopp managed to swallow the much too large bite, before he coughed, "You deserve a break too Sanji! A chance to relax."

"I did not become this crew's chef in order to relax," Sanji said very seriously, "I became a chef for this crew, in order to take care of the future Pirate King, and become the best. The best doesn't become lazy."

"But..." Usopp felt an annoyed, frustrate flush crawl up his neck, "You deserve to be able to take a break from time to time! I don't want you to overwork!"

"Like you?" Sanji asked, cracking a meager joke.

Usopp flushed, "Well... Yeah! Just look at me! If I had been doing my part to take care of myself, I wouldn't be here! So... don't start copying me!"

Sanji smiled suddenly, bright and radiant and startling against his once gloomy and serious expression, "I won't. I can't overwork when it comes to taking care of the crew. I have to also take care of myself to be good for everyone." And then, slowly, cautiously, Sanji reached out for one of Usopp's hands, the one holding the spoon. Gently, Sanji held Usopp's hand in the frailest of grasps, gentle and brittle. Tenuous.

The pulse through their hands, however, was strong; unbreakable.

"Don't push yourself too hard either. Learn to balance. We need you at your best."

Usopp nodded quietly, a calm settling between them, quiet and full of something intangible.

Finally, Sanji pulled away, his hand first, and then the rest of him. The moment gone, but still warm and filling inside Usopp's chest.

Once to his feet, Sanji rapped Usopp on the top of his head, just once, and then uttered, "Eat everything I bring you! Not a piece left!"

And then Sanji left, and Usopp did eat everything in his bowl.

Zoro was next, appearing long after Sanji brought Usopp lunch.

The room immediately flooded with tension, at least for Usopp, and was only made worse when Zoro bent down to whisper in Chopper's ear. The little doctor listened and then smiled softly before nodding his head.

"Of course Zoro!" He said, voice fond and full of admiration, and then he closed a little notebook he had been writing in, hopped down from his chair, and then scampered out of the room.

Leaving Usopp and Zoro alone.

'This isn't bed rest. They're all trying to kill me with stress!!' Usopp thought as Zoro slowly turned his steady, steely gaze upon him.

Zoro, stomped over to the chair by Usopp's bedside, his expression stony, and his eyes hard. He didn't look angry... but he didn't look happy either. Kicking the leg of the chair, the furniture spun around until it was stopped by Zoro's hand, so that he could slump into it, his arms folding against the back of his chair, and then his head plopping down on his arms. Zoro said nothing, and Usopp wondered if he was going to be interrogated. But Zoro seemed content in just glowering at Usopp.

A full thirty seconds went by, and the room was still quiet.

Unable to keep his thoughts to himself, Usopp groaned in a low ominous tone, "You look like a crime boss! Zoro, spare me!"

One of Zoro's brows shot up, and then he sighed, shaking his head.

Usopp laughed a little awkwardly, not sure what else to say. It was very embarrassing seeing Zoro. The shame from falling asleep on his watch, and then passing out in mid heated argument with Zoro, weighed down on him. It was awkward and embarrassing and,...

'Ugh, I just need to say something! Anything! Come on Captain Usopp! Say something!' Usopp thought woefully, groaning audibly as he finally talked himself into action.

"Zoro-"

"Usopp. I'm sorry."

Usopp's eyes widened and he snapped his head up to stare at Zoro shock, his mouth hanging open. Zoro's brow was furrowed, and he looked uncomfortable. He met Usopp's stunned gaze unblinkingly and sighed a little heavily. He dropped his head, a slight bow of repentance, and said again, "I'm sorry."

"What do you have to be sorry about?" Usopp finally, after too long sitting in stunned silence, managed to croak. This was unbelievable! Usopp had been the one asleep on his job!

"What in the world do you have to be sorry about?!" Usopp repeated again when Zoro did not lift his head.

Zoro finally did lift his head, his eyes incredulous, and his expression confused, "I yelled at you while you were sick. I didn't listen. I should have at least heard what you had to say. And then... then cast judgment."

"No!" Usopp snapped.

A startled, half-laugh, half-scoff burst out of Zoro's chest, "Yes. I yelled at you-"

"I shirked my duties!"

"You did not! You've always taken watch very seriously!"

"And I fell asleep!"

"Look I'm saying I should have known based on your history-"

"I play tricks, and act up all the time!"

Zoro's hands were like iron on Usopp's shoulders.

They had moved to clamp down on the sniper, and now they were squeezing and shaking Usopp firmly, "You play pranks. You tell lies. You run around in battle, and try to figure out an easy way out. Buty You do not shirk your duties when it concerns this crew's safety!" Zoro's gaze was hard and steady, "In your way, you look after this crew. You've become a brave warrior of the sea... and I forgot. I got angry and scared and yelled at you when I should have noticed something was wrong first. Was wrong with you. That was bad of me. I'm sorry Usopp."

Usopp felt his throat clench tight. He kind of wanted to cry. No, he really wanted to cry. He wasn't sure if he was happy or sad about it. But Zoro's words... they wrecked him in a way Usopp wasn't sure how to name.

Zoro sighed and his hand slid down Usopp's arms, resting in the crook of his elbows. He kept them there, the heat of his skin burning into Usopp's. "We are friends. And I know you better than how I responded. My anger got ahead of me... my concern tripped me up. I'm sorry."

"Stop," Usopp wheezed, his voice embarrassingly high-pitched and wobbly, "Stop! You were right to be mad. I made a mistake. I wasn't eating enough, I was worrying on my own, I got tired, I'm the one who overworked! And..." A crazy thought entered Usopp's head. He shook his head in disbelief about what he was about to say, but it had to be done, "And when I'm out of this bed, I expect you to make me do the punishment for falling asleep during watch. Whatever that is!"

Zoro blinked, his face startled out of his grim expression. And then, in a blink, he was ginning savagely, his eyes flashing in some sort of predatory delight. He laughed hard, and loud, but only for a moment. It rattled off after a moment and he shook his head, "Alright Usopp... I hear you. You want to take responsibility. When you're cleared for hard labor from Chopper... find me. You'll do my workout routine for a day."

Usopp closed his eyes and shuddered, but he nodded his head, "Yeah... Yeah."

Zoro nodded, and clapped a hand on Usopp's arm, "Good. Good. You're not running away."

His eyes still closed, Usopp puffed up his chest, "I'm a brave mighty warrior of the sea! God Usopp they call me! I don't run..." Usopp cracked open an eye and amended, "...tactical retreat though... maybe I do that."

Zoro smiled at Usopp, and nodded, and briskly, gave Usopp a compliment, "You've gotten strong Usopp."

He got up then, hands sliding into his pockets, and Zoro turned to go, but Usopp didn't feel like he had said everything that needed to be said. There was something he could share with Zoro.

So when Zoro's hand touched the doorknob, Usopp called out, "I wasn't so sick. It wasn't... just from being tired. The fainting. I... I had... I had a dream. About my Mom."

A visible ripple went up Zoro's spine, and a rare look of instant knowing, and understanding, passed from the swordsman's gaze into the sniper's.  Zoro and Usopp had both spoken of dreams. Of Loss. A friend; a mother. Of Bad days with good memories that sting. Of a certain archaeologist, at times, being a little too painful to look at. Zoro knew. Zoro could understand.

"I see..." Zoro said solemnly, and he did.

"I dreamed of Mom on top of,   guess, how overworked I was..." Usopp shrugged, "It got to me. When you were trying to get me to answer you... I didn't it just..." Usopp trailed off, and shrugged his shoulders, "It got to me."

"Memories can do that," Zoro said with sincere agreement.

He held Usopp's gaze again, and it looked like he considered apologizing again. But they both knew an apology at this time would cheapen their moment; cheapen their understanding, and so Zoro had nodded once more, and left quietly.

Usopp took a nap after that. The encounter had been exhausting in the way forgiveness and understandings could be.

Usopp had foolishly thought that Zoro and Sanji would be his two exhausting moments. He had hoped and expected his bed rest to be smooth sailing after that.

It was not to be.

At nightfall, just after dinner, in he came.

His Captain, and Usopp again, questioned how Chopper thought he would be getting any rest.

He loved his crew, they were his family; they were more. But that love was suffocating at time. Their concern was weights, and it could be stifling. Crushing. He relished their attention.

But sometimes, he drowned in it.

Sunk under the weight of it all.

How did people carry love so easily? How did Sanji sing about it, dance, and twirl for it? How did Franky take in every person in need he saw, call them Bro, or Sis, and proudly defend those people to the end. How could they do it? How was he supposed to do it? If his mother had lived; if his father had been home, would Usopp have a better idea?

He just didn't know.

Luffy, flopped into Usopp's sickbed, his head at Usopp's lap, his hat floating from him as he rag-dolled on to Usopp and his mattress. His weight, the moment his Captain fell into him, brought Usopp out of his musings. Instinctively, Usopp reached out and caught Luffy's hat, and then set it on top of his Captain's back. Luffy's face looked calm, and he was smiling as he made himself comfortable on Usopp's lap, but Usopp knew Luffy better by now.

Luffy was quiet, and he was calm, and this all meant Luffy was serious. Even if the Captain didn't understand it himself, he had something to say, and it would be important.

So, Usopp waited.

"Hi, Luffy."

"Hi, Usopp!" Luffy echoed back in eager enthusiasm, but the volume wasn't quite there. He wasn't quite loud enough. Plenty loud, but not Luffy loud.

Luffy plopped up, sitting painfully on Usopp's legs, and smiled at  Usopp before asking, "Are you feeling rested yet?"

"No," Usopp answered with a dramatic sigh, actually telling the truth, "It's hard to get rest here!"

"How did you overwork?" Luffy asked, not looking like he knew what the term even meant. He tilted his head, that wise strange look blazing in his eyes that he sometimes got, and questioned, "Did you forget to play?"

Usopp sighed a nervous bubble in his chest. He wiggled his legs out from underneath his Captain and brought them to his chest. Wrapping his arms around them, and then himself, Usopp licked his lips and mused, "Well... I don't know. I just... did it without noticing."

"Were you sleeping enough?" Luffy asked.

Usopp thought about this, "I think so..."

"Eating enough?"

Usopp laughed uncomfortably, "Ah... well no..."

Luffy made a face, "That's your problem! Going hungry is no joke! How could you not eat enough!?" Luffy shook his head in disbelief, a disgusted frown on his face, "You gotta eat better."

Usopp chuckled, "Yes, yes..."

And then Luffy was leaning close, a hand on Usopp's knee, "You gotta notice when you're not doing well. You have to take care of yourself... or tell us, so we can remind you. Got it?"

And there it was. The strange strong tone that made you want to be better. That made you sorry for when you screwed up, and proud when you did something correctly.

"I'm sorry. I'll be more careful," Usopp said, gripping himself tight.

Luffy held Usopp's gaze and then nodded. His hand fell away and he sighed with relief, "Good! Good..." Luffy yawned and flopped back down on the bed limbs starfished away from him. Already, he seemed moments away from sleep.

"You're just tired, right? Tired from overworking? You're sure you're not sick?" Luffy's words were sleepy, but Usopp knew his Captain had enough energy to wait for his answer.

Usopp thought of his mother, and he almost remembered what it was like when she was sick. Almost recalled all her symptoms again, and the fear he felt watching her energy fade away. And then... he shoved it. Shoved the memory far from him. No. No. No, no, no, no! He was not sick. He had worked too hard. He was exhausted. That was it was.

It was Nothing!

I had been a moment... and nothing else! Nothing, more.

"Yup, I'm fine Luffy. Never been sick, not a day in my life!" Usopp boasted, "I'm fine."

Luffy sighed, and then it turned into a snore.

And for some reason, while being the shortest encounter, it had exhausted Usopp the most. Had kept him up at night. Kept him wondering if he had told a lie somehow. But Usopp was the storyteller. He was in control.

You couldn't lie to yourself, right?

Right.

The next day, Chopper checked Usopp's blood pressure.

"This is terrible! it's like you didn't rest at all!" The reindeer squeaked with displeasure and alarm.

Usopp shot Chopper an exhausted and disdainful look, "Chopper..."

"Uh... Yes, Usopp?"

"I think I need more rest... without visitors."

Chapter Text

Usopp was kept in bed one more day, not that he minded.

His first two days of "rest," had almost done him in after all.

On that one more day of rest, the crew was kept away, which did wonders for Usopp's blood pressure. And as Chopper planned, he gave Usopp an allergy test; a six bis six square on his forearm. Usopp's arm itched like crazy. Within minutes, Chopper seemed to have his answer, and looking quite chipper, he went about tapping Usopp on his sinuses, humming and whispering to himself in that way stuffy old doctors usually did.

"By sound alone, you're getting to be a better doctor!" Usopp had teased.

The reindeer had smiled, called Usopp an ass, and then settled in his seat looking rather pleased. And then he pushed his chair to his desk and announced, "Your sinuses are terrible right now. And the test on your arm shows you're allergic to the native trees here! I do believe our first guess about allergies, was right!"

Usopp glanced at his terribly itching arm, two little raised bumps glaring red and ominously at him from his arm, "So you're saying...?"

Chopper turned to grin at Usopp, "I'm saying, everything looks like allergies, a very bad allergic reaction to Cyprus trees, which are not common in the East Blue!" Chopper grinned, "I'm mixing up some medicine you need to start taking daily, including a nose spray. At least until we're off this island."

Usopp laughed and boasted, "See! I told you it was just allergies! It was nothing!"

Inside, however, Usopp had been more than a little relieved. A tiny part of him, a part that sounded like Sogeking, had been whispering to Usopp to tell Chopper about his mother. About her symptoms. About her death. In more detail than the vague amounts, he had given. But Usopp had refused to listen to it because what did this voice know!? It wasn't like his mother's illness, it wasn't like that! He had a dizzy spell, and then a nose bleed. It was nothing.

Usopp was fine.

And the allergy test proved it.

Now, released from his bed, Chopper was rather happily letting the crew know over breakfast about Usopp's allergies.

"... And so, Usopp should stay away from those trees until he has taken the medicine at least for a week," Chopper turned to Usopp, who sat diagonally from the reindeer, shoveling eggs into his mouth, "And I suggest you wear a mask, if you're outside for long periods of time during the day. And don't touch your eyes! You'll aggravate your allergies more by rubbing. Also, no hard labor for a week! I want your medicine to be in full effect before you overdo it!"

"Sounds to me, like you're giving Usopp an excuse to be waited on hand and foot!" Nami complained though she was smiling looking very pleased. With a flippant toss, she dropped her bacon on Usopp's plate, and he ate it happily.

Brook was grinning too, wide and big, his skeletal face somehow perfectly expressive despite his lack of facial tissue, "I can't believe trees could have caused all that! What a relief!"

"At least it's not over women like an idiot-cook," Zoro muttered, ignore the heated glare Sanji directed at him.

Usopp smiled, his cheeks bulging with food, and said nothing.

Really, he was so relieved and even overjoyed to be given such good news.

Everything was going to return back to normal.

Thank goodness.

"Can't Usopp play with me though?" Luffy whined, but Chopper was already scowling and shaking his head.

"No! Not with how hard you play! You have to wait!"

"Nooo! But Chopper...!!"

"Just one more week! He needs to be treated gently! Gentle, Luffy!"

"I can do that!! I'm gentle!" The Captain lied, or if not lied, made a promise he would surely break.

Robin smiled at the Captain across the table, and politely chuckled at him. It seemed this was enough to let him know his begging would be futile, and so he sagged in his seat.

"Ah, Luffy, I'll keep you company!" Franky offered, throwing a friendly arm around his Captain.

"It's also just for a short time," Chopper reminded Luffy, his voice sounding a little deflated. "We can all have fun together when everyone is in tip-top shape!" He forced the words out with enthusiasm, before stabbing his fork into a large berry on his plate. He popped it in his mouth and then with a big grin announced,  "We still have plenty of time on this island to enjoy it together!"

Luffy perked up, having chosen to crawl onto Franky's back, and then sag against his shoulders. No longer looking forlorn, he raised a fist in the air and shouted, "We should go on a bug hunt!"

"Bug hunt!!" Was echoed in eager refrain from Brook, and Chopper. Usopp's mouth was too full to agree, but he eagerly lifted up his arms anyway.

Sanji picked up Usopp's plate, and paused to mutter in Usopp's ear, "You're still eating my meal plan until I deem otherwise."

Usopp gave Sanji a dubious disgruntled look, but then shrugged. When he managed to swallow he muttered, "Like anyone would complain about eating a special food course by you!"

Sanji smiled and pat the top of Usopp's head, smashing the sniper's hat playfully over his eyes.

"When will he be fit for more grueling work?" Zoro asked, smirking a little as Usopp shot him a worried look.

"A week, as I said," Chopper said suspiciously. Gently he prodded Zoro's arm with his spoon and scolded, "Don't bully Usopp."

Zoro looked like he was fighting an evil smile, but with a somewhat believable voice managed, "Of course not. Just wondering."

"He's going to kill me..." Usopp moaned in low tones, Nami arching an unsympathetic brow at his plight. He leaned against her arm, emitting an animalistic-like whine, and she moved her hand to flick his nose. She paused and flicked his forehead instead.

"Ow! Nami..." Usopp whined, but she upturned her nose at him and held out her glass, which Sanji promptly refilled with juice.

The conversation continued to shift into new topics, their voices climbing into that of a dull roar. And with that, life was returned to normal. The crew ate, laughed, and a few skirmishes broke of over Luffy's food stealing. Ad everything felt... normal. Chaotic and loud of course, but normal by the crew's standards. As the meal ended, the crew moved to depart into other planned activities.

"Chopper, I can still work on my smoke bombs on the beach right?" Usopp asked, stopping the little reindeer before he ran off to join Luffy in some game.

"If someone carries your stuff out there, and you wear a mask... but can't you work in your workshop?" Chopper asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"The materials I'm using aren't the normal quietly I work with. They've been putting off a little excess smoke," Usopp explained with a helpless shrug.

Franky came up and clapped Usopp on the back, "Well let me work on better ventilation for your workshop then. It should be up to date, I'm top-notch after all..." Franky shook his head, "But, whatever! You shouldn't be dealing with fumes, and if you've got a problem bro, I'll fix it!"

"And in the meantime, I will carry your stuff outside so you can work!" Jinbe declared reasonably.

Chopper smiled, and then cut a sly look to Usopp, "See how easily things go if you just ask for help?"

Usopp playfully batted at Chopper, muttering, "Yeah, yeah! I'll take care of myself!"

"And I'll get that ventilation figured out today at the earliest, and tomorrow by the latest! It'll be super! No problem bro!"

And with that sorted, the day carried out. The crew busied themselves in all sorts of tasks, some necessary and some not, and Usopp worked on his smoke bombs. Lunch was brought to him, along with a small lecture from Sanji about taking a break. They talked and laughed until Usopp's plate was empty, and then parted ways with Usopp watching after Sanji's back. He sat back down and wondered about making a type of some bomb in shoes. He could call them, "get-away shoes," and instead of Sanji fighting all the time, he could give running away a try too.

'He'll live longer that way too, just like me!' Usopp thought coughing into his hand. He wiped it against his pants without looking, and resumed work.

He only thought about his mother's coughs a little.

Robin and Nami stopped by a little while later, shopping bags in hand. Nami came and peaked at his work, and Usopp remembered something he was wanting from the town.

"Do you girls think you'll be going back into town, today or tomorrow?"

Robin and Nami looked at each other, and Nami shrugged at Robin's expectant look. Robin turned to Usopp with an easy smile, "We could make an extra trip tomorrow."

"Or I could get Zoro to do it for a decrease on his interest if I'm feeling lazy!" Nami chirped, grinning from ear to ear.

Usopp shook his head, and explained, "Well, if you can get into town, there's a guy called Mr. Agate. He's a bit... grumpy, I suppose, but he's got some organic dyes I want. Yellow, green, and Pink."

"We can pick it up," Robin promised.

"Or Zoro," Nami inisited. She pointed a finger at Usopp, "Don't overwork!"

"How can I overwork sitting on a beach?" Usopp complained, throwing up his hands in annoyance.

Nami tugged Robin by the hand, and called over her shoulder, "You're dumb enough to figure it out!"

Usopp waved a dismissing hand at her, and then coughed into his hands. It went on for a little longer than he would have liked. Something wet hit his hands, and at last, he stopped. Hastily he rubbed his palms against his pants. Rubbed, and rubbed, until he knew his hands were clean; until his legs hurt a little from the vigorous motion. He refused to look down. Maybe he needed a handkerchief.

His mother had carried around a discreet handkerchief that she would hide from him.

When it was dinner time, Chopper and Luffy came to collect him, Jinbe patiently following behind them. Jinbe gathered up Usopp's belongings, while Chopper showed off a few bugs he and Luffy had gathered. Luffy's face was red from the sun, and Usopp dared to pinch his sun-burnt cheek. Luffy howled in pain, and shouted at Usopp, and tried to pull on his nose in retaliation. Chopper shrieked in protest, but it was Jinbe who calmed the trio down and hurried them on towards the ship, with the explanation dinner was waiting.

Usopp smiled the whole way while keeping a cough secured in his throat until his eyes watered.

Until he could pass it off as choking on food at the dinner table.

He refused to look at his hands as he wiped them hastily on his pants.

It was a struggle to finish his plate, but he felt more than one set of eyes watching him, so Usopp forced it down.

As the group filed off, Brook for the first watch and everyone else to either the boy's cabin or the girl's, Usopp went to his workshop, planning to sleep there.

In the privacy of his worship, he nervously checked his pants where he had been rubbing his legs.

There were no signs of blood.

"Geeze Usopp!!" Usopp wheezed, leaning heavily against the wall of his shop, "What have you been thinking today? What are you worrying about!"

He laughed, if only so he could force himself to breathe.

"You're not sick! You felt great today! Just a little cough. Just a little cough. Get a grip!" Usopp chuckled, the release of his anxiety making his skin prickle with sweat. As a chill flooded from him, Usopp sank into his workbench chair, and let himself relax into it.

He was overthinking it.

The dizziness and the nosebleed were just allergies. Just like Chopper said. The cough, was surely related. It made sense. Coughs and sneezes happened with allergies. This was allergies.

Just like he said.

Usopp pilled a little hand mirror from one of the drawers of his work table, and looked at his face.

When he looked, he normally saw his father. So much of his face was his father's.

All but the nose and hair color.

But tonight, as he looked at his tired eyes, he saw his mother.

And as he watched his reflection, Usopp felt that he and his mother could never be so much alike, as a drop of blood, dripped silently down his nose.

"You're fine!" Usopp hissed, turning the small mirror over in a huff, and then hastily wiping his nose.

He closed his eyes shut tight, and hissed again, "You're fine!"

He planned to say it again and again, until it was true.

Chapter Text

Usopp is an amazing actor.

He had always thought this, because after all, he had been trained by famous actors who had traveled across the sea. They had visited his town by boat, and when they spotted him, they declared him perfect lead material and taught him all the fine points of acting. Crying on cue, Smiling sincerely, delivering a strong voice, etc, etc!! Usopp could do it all, and make you believe whatever he was trying to convey. Just ask his ten thousand followers! Usopp could act.

So as the days passed, Usopp acted.

He smiled, he laughed, he ate, and he joked.  And no one noticed that something wasn't quite right, or maybe they did, but he presented as normal enough, so no one suspected. Not too much, at least. And if Usopp thought it was strange he was dizzy, or having a nose bleed, or seeing things sometimes... well Usopp just forced himself not to notice. If he pretended, everything would be fine. He was sure, if he just waited, just gave it some time, he'd be back to normal. It was going to be normal. It would be fine.

He just had to keep the act up. If he got through the week, Usopp just had a feeling, things would be fine.

So, he accepted the dyes from Robin and Nami that they had retrieved from town for him. And he wiped his bloody nose when they left. He ate heartily with Sanji, singing his praises for the fine food. And even if his stomach cramped painfully the whole time, and later he would sweat for hours, Usopp could still say it was the best meal he ever had. Sanji's food was always good after all. He talked and laughed with his crew, cheering them on safely from his chair. He made sure he was the last to get up to his feet, \ so no one would see his shaking legs. This was pretty easy to do. He had learned a long time ago how to walk on trembling legs.

He was doing great. A four star performance. He deserved an award. Truly, there was no one as fine an actor as him. He just had to keep smiling. Smiling and laughing. He'd do it until he broke.

On day four of Usopp's great act, Chopper tapped on Usopp's sinuses and made a humming sound of disappointment, "Your sinuses still seem a little clogged... and the capillaries of your nose... they're really enflamed! Are you getting nose bleeds after your nasal spray?"

"Yes, actually," Usopp admitted, because really, he couldn't deny it. He was getting nose bleeds quite a lot. Three times a day since yesterday.

"Let me adjust the dosage..." Chopper sighed with concern, "Sometimes nasal sprays can do that. If you experience nosebleeds, or any other uncomfortable symptom from the new dosage, you must tell me about it... Please." The little reindeer sagged in his seat, "The patient shouldn't have to suffer."

Usopp felt his smile crack, "I'm not suffering."

Chopper tilted his head, and smiled slightly at Usopp, "Well... maybe not. But side effects from medicine can be just as harmful as the illness. If you're having a rough symptom, it's my duty as a doctor to try and treat you."

Usopp's smile hurt.

"You're not responsible if I'm suffering you know!" Usopp said with a dismissive wave, "If I can power through it-"

"Of course I'm responsible!" Chopper gasped, his eyes wide and mouth expression shocked, "I'm your doctor! And not just that, I'm your friend! How can I call myself a doctor if I don't try everything to help you!"

Usopp curled his hands into the fabric of his pants, "But... but you can't be responsible for every pain or-"

Chopper put a hoof on Usopp's hand, and very softly, but in a firm tone interrupted, "As your doctor, If I give you something that makes you feel bad, I need to change up the medicine. I can't be responsible for all your pains... but I consider myself responsible for giving you the best quality of life in regards to your health. I'm this crew's doctor and your nakama. I don't want you suffering. As long as we know the problem, we can always try new medicine to suit your needs." Chopper smiled at Usopp radiantly, and with confidence declared, "If I can help it, I will never let my patients suffer! So don't be afraid to tell me if something I'm giving you isn't working."

Usopp thinks he's smiling as he forces out a reluctant laugh, "Okay Chopper. I'm sorry... thanks for being so worried about me and the crew... perhaps today, I'll stay in my workshop and just tinker... avoid the outside air for a bit."

Chopper nodded approvingly, "That's a good idea. No sense in overdoing it. We'll just adjust your medicine until it works! Don't worry! We'll get these allergies under control."

Usopp pat Chopper on the head firmly, and got to his feet by bracing himself against Chopper's head. The little reindeer laughed and batted Usopp's hand away with a laugh.

Usopp didn't look back as he walked back towards his workshop.

When he got there, he locked the door, laid down on the floor, and sobbed in his forearm to muffle the sounds he was making.

"You're a liar Usopp," Sogeking said from somewhere in Usopp's peripherals, and for once it didn't sound like a compliment.

Usopp kept himself sequestered away from his crew the rest of the day, needing to recharge and rest if he was going to keep up his act. But rest was hard, as Sogeking had a lot to say to him.

"Give it up!" Sogeking told him, his golden mask glinting, "Tell your friends you're suffering!"

"I'm not!" Usopp hissed at Sogeking, "I'm not!"

"You are! Tell your friends!" Sogeking demanded, shaking both his clenched fists in the air.

Usopp jumped through the image of Sogeking and hissed, "Quiet! Quiet... I'm fine! I'm fine! I knew you weren't real... so I'm fine!" Usopp spun, looking for Sogeking again, but his workshop remained empty.

"See... it's fine," Usopp whispered as blood slid down from his left nostril.

Sogeking made a scoffing noise from the corner of the ceiling he had managed to splay himself on, "You call this fine Usopp?"

Usopp looked up, and pointed angrily at the Sniper King, "You're not real! You can't tell me what to do!"

Sogeking shook his head, "I thought you were done hiding Usopp. I thought you had become a brave warrior of the sea." Sogeking shook his head again and faded away.

Usopp wiped his nose, sat down at his work desk, and slept.

As he slept, he felt his mother pet his hair.

"Tomorrow will be better," She said.

She was still there when he woke, his nose crusted over with blood. She gave him soft instruction on how to clean his face and then coached him on how to stand up straight.

"Smile... they won't know you're hurting if you smile," Banchina said, and then smiled like how he always remembered.

"See? It looks real, doesn't it?"

He mimicked his mother's smile until he was sure he had mastered it.

Eventually, when Usopp went out on the fifth day, a smile plastered on his face, he thought he might be able to keep it up. Who cared if Sogeking was following him around all day, silently watching and not saying anything. Who cared, if more than once Usopp saw his mother loitering around on the ship, her back turned to him. Today was great. He could persevere. He was fine. And if it wasn't fine-he was great at acting. Usopp was the best at acting. Once, a group of traveling actors-

"Usopp..." Brook's voice, clear and crisp jolted Usopp from his spiral. The musician's hand gently landed on Usopp's shoulder and with a kind smile, Brook babbled, "Perhaps after lunch, you should take a nap... and maybe talk to Chopper. You're looking a little poorly. Are you sure it's just allergies?"

Usopp's smile was like broken glass, but he kept it on and nodded at Brook.

The skeleton stared at Usopp, tilting his head back and forth. His dark sockets peered at Usopp in a manner that made the young man feel exposed. Any moment the musician would announce Usopp's act, and it would all be over. Usopp's heart was beginning to rattle in his chest. It was going to burst out of him, and he would fall apart. How can one act without a heart? You just couldn't. He just-

Brook made a soft sound, "Well... let's go eat. Sanji's lunch will pick you right back up." He pat Usopp's arm twice and then sauntered away.

Usopp watched him go, Sogeking and his mother standing at his side.

"You can't keep this up," Sogeking said grimly.

"I think they'll see you cracking soon," Banchina agreed.

Usopp closed his eyes and took in a breath.

He was doing so well!

Was even convinced, he felt pretty good. There was no pain. His body felt a little strange and tingly, but it was nice. It was nice. He wasn't even that tired. It was easy to go through the motions.

He thought he'd make it.

Taking a deep breath, Usopp followed Brook inside the dining hall.

As per usual Sanji had whipped up something amazing. The smells from the kitchen, mingled into the dining hall, and added to the sight laid out on the table. Jinbe had found some rare giant crab, that while proving a challenge to take out, was expected to be a delicious meal. So Sanji had dressed up the horse-sized crab, and made a disgustingly large Hot pot meal, served alongside all the delicious acruitimonts anyone could want.

He sat down mechanically, Luffy hooting loudly how he wished he'd been the one to finish off the crab.

Usopp picked up his spoon... he just had to get through this.

He just had to get through this!

"I bet it was a really good fight..." Luffy mourned, his eyes shining with longing, even as he lifted a crab claw to his mouth.

"Sorry Captain, but his kind stays mostly under the water. It would have been rare indeed for someone of his size to venture to the top," Jinbe said with a hearty grin.

"You should draw it out next time," Luffy grumbled, his mouth already full with crab claw meat.

"Luffy! At least get rid of the shell first!" Nami snapped at him, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

"The shell's the best part!" Luffy whined, before crunching down on the crab claw, chomping through the shell as if it was a harmless candy coating.

Zoro copied the captain, crunching through his crab shell with a careful but decisive bite. He nodded a little and rumbled, "S'not so bad."

"Animals. You're fucking animals!" Sanji muttered, Nami and Robin making faces that seemed to agree with the sentiment.

"Luffy bro, you're crazy! You're wasting too much time on the shell! Too much chewin'! It's the meat you want!" Franky said, banging a fist on the table.

"Can I have some more of the soup Sanji?" Chopper asked holding out a bowl.

"Let me get it Chopper!" Brook offered, taking the bowl, and then ladling in another helping for the reindeer, "I haven't seen Mr. Sanji make a plate for himself yet."

"Thanks, Brook," Sanji said with a smile, filling up his own plate after double checking Robin's serving was piled to the proper height.

Sanji sank in his seat, and spooned a mouthful of fish stew in his mouth, and shot a glance over at Usopp.

Usopp was stirring his meal together, pushing piles to the side. His eyes seemed a little distant and forlorn, off in some far off thought. Sanji took another spoonful of his meal but kept his eyes on Usopp. Usopp had until his third spoonful to take a bite or Sanji would-

Usopp lifted a mound of crab, carrot, rice, and bean sprouts to his mouth, and Sanji relaxed. Usopp was eating- he could relax.

Sanji put in his third mouthful of food, and caught Chopper's eyes. The little doctor had been nervously watching too, and the pair of them shared a relieved look. It was just supposed to be allergies, but something... something uneasy was just floating in the air. Some sort of tension, just waiting to snap.

'Probably imagining,' Sanji thought, taking another mouthful of food.

And then Usopp made a strange sound.

Something gutteral, and stuck in his throat.

Sanji turned to look at Usopp, as well as Robin who sat on Usopp's other side. For a moment, she and Sanji shared a nervous glance, but then they both turned to Usopp, who had a spoon in his mouth, his hand grasped tightly around the end of it.

"Usopp?"

"Longnose-kun... are you alright?"

Usopp's eyes were watering, but he smiled around his spoonful and then nodded quickly.

"That was a gag," Sanji accused, his voice low and tone sharp.

Chopper had turned to watch now, and Zoro was looking up.

The raucous room was starting to quiet down.

Usopp shook his head no, and at Sanji's glare, hurried to swallow his mouthful. It didn't look like it went down easy.

And then it came back up, and silence fell over the dining hall.

"Usopp?" Someone said. Maybe it was Chopper. Maybe it was Luffy. But someone said Usopp's name, and that triggered motion.

Sanji was up first, taking Usopp's plate away from him and setting it aside, while Nami had dashed over to the kitchen to retrieve a trashcan and put it between Usopp's feet. Robin was standing and pulling Usopp's hair back and out of the way. Usopp continued to vomit, emptying his stomach completely, and continuing to choke even when his body had nothing left to expel.

As the retching finally came to an end, Usopp became aware of Chopper shooing the crewmates that weren't helping Usopp, back and away from the table.

"Up against the wall, he's crowded enough! Back up!" Chopper ordered voice firm. He glanced back at the small group tending to Usopp, and waved at Sanji, "Sanji go ahead and step away. Usopp has enough helpers."

The cook cast a wide-eyed look at Chopper, and then darted his eyes to Usopp's back, clearly looking for a way to be of further use.

"Sanji!" Chopper said again, and the cook finally stepped away leaving Usopp in the care of Robin and Nami.

"Why is he sick? The food's great!" Luffy asked, twisting his fingers nervously. So nervously in fact, that he was stretching his rubber fingers out into rubbery ropes that sagged towards the ground.

"Did Usopp-bro choke?" Franky asked, voice hopeful, but face full of doubt.

Usopp started to gag again, coughing and hacking as his insides turned. Chopper approached, and pressed a hoof to Usopp's brow, muttering to himself as he took metal notes on Usopp's condition, "...Low fever, damp skin, sallow complexion..."

"Nami, pass me a cup of water. Usopp, don't swallow, just rinse your mouth out," Robin directed encouragingly, lifting Usopp's hair high, so she could stroke the back of his warm neck.

Usopp doubled over further, pressing against the hands that steadied him, and strangely, recalled a memory of his father and mother.

"Usopp, take a sip and spit it out, it'll make it easier," Nami coaxed pressing the cup to Usopp's lips.

His father would be leaving soon. It must have been a memory from then. All Usopp's memories of his father were a little hazy, a little blurry around the edges. More often than not, Usopp's father was made up of feelings. Warm, and sad. Loud, and happy. The moment of warmth you feel before you're about to get a hug you've been waiting for, a combination of heat from body and soul. All tinged with a bit of disappointment.

But this memory was clear.

Usopp took the cup and sloshed some water in his mouth. He spit it out into the trashcan, and coughed hard. His insides were clenching. Blood started to drip from his nose.

Yasopp was tugging Banchina's hand in the dark, and Usopp was watching from his mother's back, half asleep with her free arm curled under his legs. Yasopp would leave tomorrow, chasing his dream and leaving his family behind. Banchina was thrilled for him, and Usopp had echoed her proclamation. One of the first lies he could recall telling. Yasopp pulled Banchina along until they reached the cliffside that stretched over the sea. He looked to the sea, and he smiled big and bright. So big, the even half-asleep, Usopp had smiled too.

Usopp stood up, Chopper and Robin steadying him as he got up.

"Are you okay? Do you need help?" Chopper asked, and then pointed back to the chair, "Why don't you go ahead and sit down. Sit down."

"Ah the sea," Yasopp said.

"Ah the sea," Banchina echoed, her soft voice full of amusement and love.

"My other love," Yasopp sighed.

"Your other wife," Banchina agreed.

Usopp shrugged Robin off, lifting a hand to his face and nose. It was as if his body's resolve to keep up his act had broken, and now broken, everything Usopp had been trying to repress was coming to the forefront. His nose was guhsing. The room was spinning. And everything was aching.

"Usopp sit down!" Chopper said again.

"My other wife..." Yasopp whispered, a strange melancholy echo behind his words. "If only I hadn't fallen for two."

"I might not love you like I do if you didn't love the sea," Banchina said with a wistful sigh,  "I love your passion."

Yasopp hummed, and smiled at Banchina, a twinkle in his eye, "Remember when I confessed to you?"

Banchina laughed, "Yes... I remember."

"USOPP!"

Usopp blinked into awareness as he burst out of the dining hall and onto the ship's deck. He had started running. And now that he was running, it seemed like a good idea to keep it up. No point in stopping now. So he kept running, and ran straight for Sunny's figurehead. Their boat was docked, but from the figurehead, he could still jump into the sea. He needed to cool off. He needed an escape.

"Usopp. You need to face your mistakes. Quit running!" Sogeking hissed.

"Hold your breath," Banchina suggested.

Usopp climbed on top of the Lion head.

Yasopp turned and smiled at Banchina. He approached the edge of the cliff and turned his back to it. Spreading his arms wide, he whispered, "I said I fell for you."

And he fell.

Down, down, down towards the ocean, the black waters swallowing him up. He disappeared for a few seconds, and them bobbed up to the surface, his laugh echoing eerily up the cliffside, along with the words, "Banchina! You too!"

Usopp was falling asleep and he was afraid of that ocean then. Afraid of it In a way he had never been afraid of before. Banchina paused, but then she settled Usopp down by the tree and wrapped him up gently in her shawl. She cupped his face, and kissed the tip of his nose. He weakly reached out with his fingers, reached to capture her in his hands and keep her from jumping. He felt if he didn't stop her, she'd leave him forever. But his hands had been too small to stop her, and he was falling into a deep sleep. She turned towards the sea, and towards his father.

And she jumped.

Usopp's name was called again by many voices, but he was already jumping, pointing himself towards the sea. He jumped, breaking the water with the tips of his fingers, and cut through the water, his eyes open.

His mother's and father's laughter echoed up the cliff, and Usopp fell asleep feeling strangely empty. Alone.

In the water, his exhausted body clenched and then relaxed, giving up all at once, and he sank.

Chapter Text

Usopp came awake as his face broke the water's surface. He was being lifted out of the water, his body cradled against a hulking side, the solid muscle like cold stone against him. His eyes fluttered for a moment, and he took in a choking breath, confused by... everything. He did not open his eyes, it would not help, of that Usopp was sure. He had been dry a moment ago... but now he was wet. 

Oh.

That's right.

He has jumped from the ship, into the water. He hadn't wanted to do that. He didn't want to be in the water. Thankfully, it seemed someone else didn't want him to be in it either. He could feel the speed at which he was being carried through the cold stream. And he was sure he knew someone who could swim this fast and get him free. They had to get him out. Usopp did not want to sink. He wanted out.

His Mother, Father, and Sogeking tried to tug him back down. Down into the sea they loved.

Usopp was not sure if he could love the sea like his parents did. He had thought privately, he loved himself more. And if he was honest, the sea had scared him... not as much as other things. But enough for Usopp to be unable to give himself fully to the sea. So the love of himself and his own fear kept him from giving himself fully to the ocean, and it took years for him to be okay with that.

And then he met Luffy and the rest of the Straw Hats, and now, he knew he loved them more than the voice of the sea. He would choose them over the ocean's call anytime. The ocean was an adventure, but it wasn't worth doing if he wasn't with them.

"So why did you jump?" Banchina asked, her hand on his wrist and pulling, "You did it on purpose."

"He didn't," Sogeking disagreed, but he still kept trying to tug Usopp down, "But your instincts told you to jump. So, in your own way, you're just following your parents."

Banchina and Yasopp had laughed as they dove from the cliff into the sea.

The arms of Usopp's Nakama which held the sniper firm, did not let him sink.

"Usopp! You hang on!" Jinbe's deep voice rumbled, washing over Usopp like the cold waters that were calling for Usopp's return.

The sea was calling for him, as it called for his father, but the voice was more menacing. It was not offering him sweet promises like it surely whispered in Yasopp's ear. Promises that were sweet enough to lead a man from his wife and small child. Promises so loud and glorious, even Banchina had smiled and waved her husband off, despite the difficult path that would be laid out for a lone woman, with a small mouth to feed, and a village who cast wary eyes at someone who would tie themself to a pirate. That sweet voice was sour to Usopp's ears, and he did not want to go.

No.

"No," Usopp breathed, closing his eyes tighter, tilting his head away from the cold spray of water.

No. He did not want to be swallowed up.

No.

"Usopp!" Jinbe was shouting again, urgent, hurt, and angry.

Usopp had enough of himself left to remember he was a liar. And he felt shame.

Usopp whimpered. He could not love the sea as they did. He did not want to give himself to the water and be lost.

But he had still jumped.

Why had he done that?

"Come with me, I will sing you to sleep," Banchina whispered.

"Usopp!" Jinbe roared a beast that belonged to the ocean, but he did not do its bidding.

And in a swoop of Jinbe's strong arms, Usopp was wrenched out of the ocean.

Usopp opened his eyes.

He was on the beach, and Jinbe loomed over him, a soaking wet, blue monster, with fear tinged eyes.

"Usopp!" He said again, his tone demanding and concerned.

"I d-don't know," Usopp whispered, his voice raw and throat burning, "I don't know."

He didn't know anything.

"You don't know a thing," Banchina sighed, offering a hand to Sogeking, to help pull him from the waters.

"How could you know, if no one was there to teach you," Sogeking mumbled, chin dipped into his chest as he stumbled to find purchase on the soggy sand.

Jinbe looked confused, anger and concern at war on his face. But his hands were gentle and warm on Usopp's shoulders, and Usopp sobbed again.

"I don't know!"

Jinbe's mouth, which had been slightly agape, closed and his lips pursed as he seemed to think.  His hands rubbed up and down Usopp's arm, trying to chase off the chill that would surely be setting in on Usopp's dampened form. He gazed down at Usopp with no judgment, Usopp meeting his gaze and crying openly as blood ran a steady stream from his nose and down his chin. A heavy thudding sounded behind Usopp, and Jinbe looked up.

Jinbe rose to his full height, and he walked past Usopp, and the sniper hung his head.

He listened to Jinbe as his mother came to pat his head.

Behind him, Usopp could hear Jinbe physically stop someone.

"Zoro-stop," Jinbe commanded, voice firm. Resolute.

"It's hard to keep friends if you tell stories all the time..." Banchina said, voice solemn and slightly scolding. Slightly disappointed.

Usopp shuddered under the weight of her shame.

"I'm-" Zoro tried to speak, but Jinbe cut the swordsman off.

"You are angry. You are confused. He does not need that now. Get Chopper off the ship. That's what he needs."

"I'm not going to hurt-" Zoro sounded outraged, and hurt. Angry, angry, angry... and full of despair.

Jinbe cut down Zoro's protests again, gentler; softer; understanding,  "Your expression... You can't talk to Usopp now. Get Chopper. ...Usopp is not well."

Silence.

A heavy, heavy, silence.

Usopp was to blame.

"I didn't mean to lie," Usopp whispered.

Had he? Had he meant to?

"Sometimes you have to tell the truth," Banchina said, and then she laughed. Beautiful, beautiful laughter that made him yearn, "Well... really you should tell the truth all the time... but son...:"

Usopp lifted his head. He had seen her. He had felt there. She had been there... but now that he was looking up... she was gone. There was only a darkening sky.

Still, the emptiness in front of him chuckled with a motherly warmth, "But son, I love your stories."

"Give this to him," Zoro's voice was rough, and strained.

"I understand. I'm sorry... and thank you," Jinbe said.

Heavy steps hurried away, and even heavier steps approached. Something soft was wrapped around Usopp, and then Jinbe was kneeling in front of Usopp again, wrapping him up in a dark green fabric. As he swaddled Usopp, and gently stroked the material over Usopp's hair, Usopp realized it was Zoro's coat. Dry and warm, as silent as its owner, offering comfort in its own way.

Tears spilled faster down Usopp's cheeks, and Usopp whispered, "They'll hate me."

"No, Usopp," Jinbe whispered firmly.

"Yes," Sogeking said assuredly, "They'll be done with you. A disgrace. You're a disgrace."

"Disgrace... I'm a disgrace..." Usopp echoed.

"And a liar," Banchina said, her hand in Sogeking's. Their eyes were dark, black pits as they looked back at Usopp.

"A Liar..." Usopp choked, swaying where he knelt. A tremor was running up and down his body, and it wasn't just from the cold of the evening air against his damp skin.

"Usopp! Keep it together!" Jinbe barked, hands squeezing Usopp's shoulders, as he stared down at Usopp. His large frame blocked Banchina and Sogeking from his sight, and Usopp was grateful. Jinbe ran a hand from the top of Usopp's head to the back of his neck. His skin was warm and slightly rough. A little like shark's skin.

"Please, Usopp... can you talk to me? I'm here... I'm here..." Jinbe was trying to be soothing, but he sounded like someone who had long fallen out of that habit.

However, Usopp still leaned into Jinbe. He pressed his face into his Nakama's wet chest, and squeezed his eyes tight, "Forgive me... forgive me..."

"Usopp! What's wrong!? Come on... please Usopp. I'm here, just talk to me... what's going on? What's the matter?" Jinbe pat Usopp's back, bringing the smaller man into the fold of his large frame.

Behind them, Usopp could hear footsteps hurtling towards them.

"Usopp!" Jinbe's firm voice called again, and in a small voice, Usopp felt compelled to answer.

"I'm dying."

Jinbe stiffened and Usopp sunk against him, his heart growing too big inside his chest. Weakly, Usopp repeated, "I'm dying."

"Uso-"

"Mama died. Mama died..." Usopp muttered his breath coming out shakey as his heart tried to go off like a bomb inside his chest, "She sang, and coughed, and worried, and I love her. And she died. And I lied... I lied... the pirates didn't come. Dad didn't come. He never came." His hand reached up and curled itself into Jinbe's wet robe. Jinbe curled his hand over Usopp, easily engulfing the sniper's own. He could fold Usopp into his arms thrice over, and make Usopp disappear in his embrace. It made Usopp feel like a child again. A child who had been caught in a string of failing stories, and so Usopp spilled his guts.

Had lost track of his story anyway. And if the storyteller loses track of their tale, it's time to end it. And start over.

He talked of his mother dying. Of her singing and casting spells. Of his scraped knee with the crocodile scar, of his nosebleeds, and concerns he didn't want to look at. Of his mother and father jumping into the sea and Usopp knowing that the sea had taken them from him. That at that moment, Usopp had lost both his parents forever. He talked of coughs, he was afraid to second guess, of his Mother and Sogeking following him everywhere. He spilled it all, and Jinbe held him quietly.

"...And I'm going to die. Like Mama. I'm going to..." Usopp's words began to taper out, and he sunk into Jinbe's hold. He was unable to keep himself sitting up.

But Jinbe took Usopp's weight with ease, immediately shifting into fully supporting him, and cradled Usopp like a babe as Usopp croaked out what had been on his mind, "I lied. I lied... I'm dying."

Usopp shuddered. His heart shuddered. And he passed out.

And Jinbe tucked Zoro's coat further around the Sniper's body, and looked up.

Chopper, Zoro, Sanji, and Luffy were standing less than two feet away, their faces twisted in horror. No doubt matching the face Jinbe could finally make now that Usopp's eyes were closed. Behind them, the rest of the crew were running, jumping from the docked Sunny, to the dock, and then sprinting across the sands of the beach.

"What... what's going on?" Luffy finally asked, and his voice was strange. Scared and unsure in a way that was as shattering as Usopp's mangled words had been.

"He jumped in the water," Luffy said, tone pricked with too many emotions. Luffy licked his dry lips, "Why...?" And then Luffy's mouth hung open. He had too much to say, and he did not know how to say it. Or even where to start.

Chopper sniffed. His nose and eyes were wet and streaming. His fur bristled all at once, and he wiped his nose with a thin arm, "Nothing is going on."

All eyes dropped to the little reindeer as he stomped towards Jinbe and Usopp.

"Chopper?" Sanji spoke, his whole body rigid with tension and uncertainty.

"Nothing is going on..." Chopper said again, growling and gnashing his teeth as tears streamed down his cheeks. He tried to dash them away again, but the flow would not stop. With shaking hooves he began to check Usopp's vitals as he lay in Jinbe's arms, and continued to speak in a snappish, halting tone, "Nothing is going on! Usopp is sick, and I'm a doctor, and I'm going to fix it!"

Chopper had glared back at the others as if daring to be questioned.

Luffy, stood straighter, the unsure shine to his eyes gone. He rolled his shoulders back and stood taller. "Yeah..." Luffy agreed, hands curling into fists, "Yeah! Usopp's just sick, and we're going to make him better!"

"That's right!" Chopper agreed, eyes ablaze as he looked over Usopp again. To Jinbe, Chopper ordered, "let's get him on the ship!"

"It hasn't been allergies," Zoro said, tone unreadable.

"No,"  Chopper clipped, "No. But I'm going to fix it!"

"...fix it," Sanji echoed, nodding and flexing his fingers.

"Come on. Lucky this night is warm, but he's sopping wet. Back inside!" Chopper began muttering and rose to his feet. He gestured for Jinbe to follow him, and stomped towards Sunny, a steely determination in his eyes.

Rising to his feet, Jinbe hurried after the little doctor as he steered them all back to the ship. Jinbe only paused to pass Usopp off to Franky when the cyborg was in reach. "Carry him, please. You're not soaking wet!"

Franky nodded, gratitude in his eyes, alongside the intense worry that had only grown since he had seen his other friends' faces.

"What's going on?" Nami was bursting with questions, a hitch in her breath at the sudden change in direction.

"Did he... did he jump on purpose? Did he faint?"

"Not now... we... we don't know everything," Sanji answered her. Something in his tone kept her from asking another question.

Jinbe slowed until he could be in step with Zoro, who was keeping to the back, watching everyone head towards the Sunny, while simultaneously looking for threats. Jinbe sought out out Zoro's gaze, and when he had it, he reached for Zoro's arm, who reached back. They still kept their pace towards the Thousand Sunny, but Jinbe had something he had to say.

"I am sorry. I know you were just worried about Usopp... but I don't think he could have handled seeing you. Something..." Jinbe shook his head.

Zoro squinted up at Jinbe, a question on his face.

"Your concern often looks like anger... and Usopp is... is troubled. I did not want you to hurt yourself if you inadvertently scared Usopp. I am sorry if I overstepped."

Zoro's face was grim, and it only grew grimmer as he seemed to struggle with Jinbe's words. But he nodded after a time. It didn't matter how he felt about it right now. He pat Jinbe's arm and said nothing. It was not forgiveness, and it was not anger, so it would just have to do for now. Jinbe dipped his head at Zoro, quietly accepting the silence that spoke volumes.

They just had to get Usopp up to the Sunny. Chopper had to look him over. Whatever had been going on with Usopp wasn't allergies.

But that was okay.

Chopper would figure it out. Figure it out and fix it. He would.

"Usopp's going to be okay," Luffy echoed Zoro's grim thoughts, and Zoro felt something uncurl.

Their Captain had spoken, and therefore Usopp would be fine.

"Enough, enough," Zoro whispered to himself, and lifted his head, and pushed out his chest. In a louder voice, he agreed with Luffy, "Of course. It's fine."

"That's right," Robin agreed, a little breathless from panic and the back and forth sprinting, "Longnose-Kun will be fine once we get him inside."

Franky and Chopper were already ascending the ladder to Sunny's deck, the group hastily following after.

The voices rang out in agreement, echoing the shared sentiment like a mantra, even as Chopper ushered Franky into the sickbay.

"Put him down and then step outside! Everyone who has had contact with Usopp, go take warm baths and confine yourself to your room. I'll check on you when I've seen to Usopp," Chopper was all business, easily dishing out orders now that he had a job to do.

"Take care of Usopp!" Luffy called, and briefly, the doctor and Captain exchanged serious looks.

"I will!" Chopper's eyes were alight with promise, determination etched into every line on his small face. He then turned, and slammed the door, shutting the crew away from Usopp.

The Straw Hats stood in silence outside the deck, holding their breaths as if they expected an answer right away. As if they expected the door to open, and Chopper to come out with a newly restored Usopp. As if it was all that simple.

They stood waiting for movement, waiting for something... and then Luffy finally turned away from the door.

"You heard Chopper. He has Usopp. Go wash up," Luffy brushed past his crew, their gazes lifting from the door to follow after Luffy. Luffy kept his back straight and did not cast worried glances at the door. He walked in confidence, disappearing below deck to follow Chopper's orders.

Finally, the crew broke apart, drifting from each other in anxious silence, each going through the motions of finishing out their night. Chores were done, messes were cleaned, and Brook stood silently on deck for the first watch. Luffy joined him a moment later, choosing to sit outside Chopper's door and wait for news. They were all exhausted. But only Usopp slept. And as the night slipped away, one by one the crew members returned to the deck, anxiously waiting for Chopper to open the door and tell them something, anything.

And when dawn broke, the door was still closed.

"Breakfast," Sanji muttered and disappeared to go make a hasty meal.

Half an hour later, he brought bowls of eggs and bacon, that he passed it around to the crew. They ate in silence, and Sanji cleaned it up when they were done. Eventually, because even on a docked ship work needs to get done, the crew separated and went about their duties. It wasn't until almost noon, that Chopper's door finally opened. The sound of the door opening could have been a gunshot. The subtle creak seemed to catch everyone's ears, as one by one they flooded the deck, anxious and eager to hear what Chopper had to say. Luffy got up from his seat at the door, having not moved his position once, and he turned solemn eyes on Chopper, waiting with brittle patience for what Chopper had to say.

Chopper looked up at the crew, his eyes tired and wet, exhaustion in every feature of his face. He removed his hat and took in a breath.

Chapter Text

Usopp's mom was not quick to anger.

She could, and would scold, as any mother could, and did.

But she was quick to smile, quick to forgive, and quick to laugh. Quick to cast Banchina-spells. Quick to sing. Ready to be happier, and brighter than any Mama there ever was. Banchina could got annoyed... or frustrated, or tired, or worried, or any other feeling a single parent could get from raising a child alone... But she didn't get angry. Not often. Not fast.

There was only one time Usopp had seen his mother angry.

She was not quick to anger, after all.

Just one time.

He didn't like to think about it.

"I don't have anything yet," Chopper spoke, his words coming out in a rush, as he let out a long exhale. The hat clutched in his hooves twisted to the right. "I have a few more tests to do, and I want to go into town to hear about local ailments, but I don't have any idea what's wrong with Usopp... at the moment. They're... are too many possibilities." His hat twisted to the left. "It's not a flu, or pneumonia, and allergies are no longer the main concern, although they're present and not helping matters," His hat twisted back to the right. Tight. "He's burning up, and he's been in and out of lucidity. I think I managed a few extra symptoms out of him, besides the obvious ones."

Chopper twisted the hat back to the left, and held it over his chest, unware of the torment he was applying to his beloved hat.

But for all the desperate things Chopper was saying, his eyes were eerily calm. And with those calm eyes he looked back at his crewmates, "So I need your help. I need more information. I need his family's history."

"How do we help?" Someone said, though that voice might as well have belong to the entire crew. It didn't matter who asked, they all wanted to know.

"I know Usopp's mom was sick," Chopper continued again, "I know she died from it. I have a handful of symptoms from Usopp back when he talked about her, when he told stories. Some..." Chopper's hat twisted back to the right, until it was unfurled from all tension, and just remained a rather strangled looking hat between Chopper's grasp. "Most of his symptoms match what few I know she had. Chills. Fever. Nose bleeds. Hallucinations. But it's not enough. I need to know more."

He glanced at Luffy, "And if you know anything of Yasopp's medical history, I need that to."

Luffy nodded, although the despair and desperation that mingled in his eyes didn't give Chopper much hope.

Puffing his chest up a little, and seeming to steel himself, Chopper placed the mauled hat back on his head and asked, "Did any of you get any more details about Usopp's mom and how she died?"

"Are those all his symptoms?" Robin asked, the first of the crew to raise her voice.

"No, he has more. I just don't know if they match his mother's. Nausea. High blood pressure. Excessive sweating. Fatigue. Abdominal pain. I think his mood is being affected. When he's more present, he seems to sink into depression, or anger. It's... more all over the place. He hasn't been awake enough for me to be sure."

A few members of the crew, at least the ones who could bare to acknowledge it, wondered if now Usopp just couldn't hide his depression in the wake of his mysterious illness.

"The symptoms I have isn't enough to help me pinpoint what he has. I need more, anything, any information any of you might know about Banchina," Chopper reiterated again, eyes casting over his friends.

The crew was silent.

Usopp was little. He couldn't pinpoint the age... Maybe seven. Not nine surely...

Regardless of age, Usopp could remember the day he made his mom mad.

His dad's last letter had been three months ago. He was supposed to visit. Sometime. Well, as long as the Red Hair Pirates weren't heading out to the Grand Line just yet. 

Usopp shook his head. It didn't matter. His dad wouldn't go without saying good-bye. Turning back towards home he paused to glance at the shed his Mom had locked herself in. It was smoking away, which meant his Mom was inside, and she'd come out stinking and coughing. She never seemed to feel well after coming out of that shed.

But then again she hadn't been feeling well before she entered it.

She caught something in her lungs the doctor said, and she needed to rest.

But Mama didn't rest.

Slowly they looked at each other, searching for clues from one another's gazes, unsure of where to begin. Who should start. 

Who knew the most about a friend they loved, that hid past pain in clever lies that put stars in their eyes and distracted them from thorny truths?

"I know... Usopp... Usopp tells stories," Chopper's voice cracked and his eyes looked watery, "And I know sometimes... there of his conquests, of giant goldfish, and of super human feats. He... doesn't talk a lot about Banchina to me, except how nice she was, and how her smile was prefect, and her laugh echoed and tickled... and..." Chopper sniffed as he fumbled, "I need... to know if anyone heard any stories about his mom, or even his dad, that talked about the bad times... so I can... I can try and get more clues to what this could be."

"I can't think of Yasopp sick. Just..." Luffy was trying to think of the sharpshooter who always bragger about his kid and wife. Always got, "heartsick," over them as he gushed about them. "Just hungover after drinking too much. And homesick a lot. He moaned for his family like it hurt."

A voice that sounded old and judgmental, something like Garp's, muttered, 'But he still never went out to see Usopp, you never saw him write his wife or kid a letter. He asked you to befriend him, if you ever met him, and then he left.' Luffy didn't listen to that voice normally, but in the moment he gave it pause. Shaking his head, "I don't think I ever saw Yasopp sick from something he didn't do to himself."

Chopper sighed, and nodded. The tone of his sigh expectant and disappointed. He hadn't expected much about Yasopp.

Luffy swallowed, uncomfortable as he thought of his old friend. Of Shanks best drinking buddy.

"Anything else on Banchina?" Chopper piped up, glancing at the rest of the crew who were still quiet and contemplative.

The silence was heavy, and deafening in its... nothingness.

Usopp didn't always tell the truth. In his many stories were truths, but you had to look. But the most fantastical stories Usopp had, besides the ones about himself, might have been the ones about his mother. How would you pick truths out of those?

Usopp spoke of giant goldfish. Gold and Black. Goldfish with saddles, that he could ride. That leapt over islands, and spewed bubbles from their gills that the rider could breath. And you would need it, because those goldfish would dive deep in the ocean, to underwater caves where merfolk lived. The merfolk would make these jams out of grapes that looked like pearls, and sprouted from fuchsia clams, and Usopp would take that jam to his mother. It soothed her cough.

Usopp spoke of a pack of turtles. There were twelve. He would lasso them all together, and strap driftwood from defeated pirate ships to his feet, and travel across the sea at great speeds. They would catch an underground current that would take him to a bed of kelp. The kelp was multicolored and softer than any goose down. Usopp would pluck bags full of the kelp, and then when the turtles delivered him home, Usopp would stuff his mother's pillow and blankets with this multicolored kelp. So she'd have a softer and warmer place to sleep.

Usopp spoke of a tricorn. More beautiful than any unicorn, and with three horns growing in the middle of its forehead in a little line. Usopp had helped it get unstuck from a tree once, and the tricorn and Usopp became fast friends. They laughed, and played, and danced together, and the tricorn even let Usopp ride on its back. A tricorn gets its speed from its horns you know, so that meant the tricorn was faster than any other steed out there. When Usopp's mother got sick, Usopp took the tricorn to meet his mother. When he saw her in her little bed, the noble steed bowed its head and forelegs. A low, great reverent bow. And then... with a sad look at Usopp, the tricorn shed one of its horns and bade Usopp to make a soup from it. Shedding its third horn was a gift greater than gold, and it meant the tricorn could not stay with Usopp any longer, but Usopp could at least at least grind it down. And reduce the shedding's into a magical soup. Something to reduce her fever and help her sleep.

Were their any truths at all in any of these stories?

And then Zoro said, "Her name was Banchina,"

It had been scary when Banchina got mad that day.

Usopp's stomach had hurt, and his throat felt too tight, and he had wanted to run. He did run in the end, actually.

Maybe it wouldn't have been so scary when she got angry, if she had done it more than the one time Usopp could remember.

Maybe what Usopp had said, the thing that made her mad, had been so bad that it had made his sweet mother become someone she wasn't.

Usopp wasn't sure.

...

He had made her mad... only once.

And it had been about that shed. The shed he waited for her to come out of, so they could share a meager lunch together, before she told him to go play, and she went back to the shed, or to some other odd job the town would pay her for. The shed, was a menace.

Zoro was looking at Chopper, holding the little reindeer's gaze, his fists curled into fists at his side. Again he said, "Her name was Banchina. She had black hair, and Usopp's nose. She died from a fever."

"Do we know how high?" Chopper pressed, his eyes wet but unyielding.

"Hot enough to melt bags of ice, a fever that needed a fresh rag every two hours," Zoro said, a grimace coming of his face. He ducked his head away from Chopper, the awkwardness he felt, evident. "...This is stupid. I don't know the temperature. I'm not sure if he ever said what it was she died from. I don't know if I asked."

"It's something. It's something," Jinbe rumbled, voice low as a coming storm, "I... I don't think I knew anything about her. I didn't know Usopp had a mother who died until he told me on the beach."

"And I'll want to hear more of that in a minute... but..." Chopper shifted uncomfortably, "I don't know how trustworthy Usopp's words were yesterday..."

All this new information was stewing in Luffy's belly. Banchina's illness. The similarities to Usopp's symptoms. The possibility that that could mean nothing. That Usopp could have something completely new. That Chopper couldn't figure. The lack of Yasopp. Luffy did not live or dwell in doubt. He was pausing today, the doubts sliding down his throat bitterly, and weighing like a stone.

Something like injustice and unfairness crossed Luffy's mind.

"Why didn't he say anything?!" Luffy suddenly demanded, his voice sharp and accusatory. He wanted to know. Anger and fear mingled together like a bubbling concoction, neither emotion overtaking the other, nor blending well together either. Toxic. Acidic. His eyes were dark, and it made his bitter expression the more painful. "We told him to tell us if he was feeling worse! I told him!"

It felt wrong to feel so angry and full of doubt.

Banchina had just come in from outside. Her clothes were slightly smelly from the shed, where she did her extra work. Mixing up chemicals and powders and other things Usopp didn't know how to make. Things like pesticides, or smoke bombs, or fireworks or who knew what else. Maybe she even made Monster repellant. His mother, could do anything after all. And Usopp hadn't seen any monster under his bed lately.

Tricky, slimy little things...

But ever since Daddy left, Banchina needed to make extra money. Their family needed it. She had come up with a lot of ways to do so. Doing laundry, cooking, gardening, but she had focused the most on making pesticides. Their warm little island had a lot of bugs, and Banchina's pesticide mixture did wonders.

But Usopp hated the shed she sequestered herself in for her work.

Gloomy and full of smoke that snaked out from under the door and the cracked window, the shed was a monster made out of old driftwood. It made Banchina cough, and somedays she was very shaky after being inside. She would always tell Usopp he couldn't go in there, and yet she went in the shed for hours almost every day. The shed was sucking the life out of his mother, making her tired and wheeze.

She had been coughing before she started working in the shed, but it seemed like it was doing worse ever since.

"I wish you wouldn't spend so much time in the shed Mama," Usopp voiced his thought as is it came to him. Something he normally did.

She stiffened, and her gasping cough went quiet. Her posture change had been so sudden and so straight, it made Usopp turn his head.

His mother's straight back had never looked so wrong before.

"Mama?"

"Luffy... don't..." Nami whispered, thought her voice puttered out as she failed to come up with more to say.

"There are no answers," Robin droned cryptically, her eyes unwaveringly piercing the door which Usopp lay behind, "and blame is not a solution."

"He's sick," Chopper insisted, "And not like... like he had a cold sick. He's seeing things! And for who knows how long. He's not... been in his right mind. We can't get angry if we're going to help him. We need to gather information, and clues. We need to help him."

Luffy pulled his lips into his mouth, grimacing his mouth into a tight twisted line, his fists curling so hard he was shaking. It was a helpless rage, one that even Luffy knew enough to keep bottled up for now. It was bubbling inside him, all the fear and doubts.

"Anger is not gonna help us here, " Franky agreed, although he didn't sound exactly level headed either, "Anybody got any more information? Anyone?"

"Of course there's more," Zoro said with a bit more forced confidence. He rolled back his shoulders, and shifted his stance a little bit, before continuing, "I was just getting started. When his father left, he sent letters monthly, with money. He visited when their ship was nearby. Not much but, Usopp saw Yasopp at least twice a year for a while. And they were okay... for a bit. But eventually, Yasopp, and his letters, became fewer and further between. And then Banchina was having to take on odd jobs."

"Usopp learned to fish," Nami supplied after Zoro tapered off. She laughed, a little brokenly, "Best fisherman for miles... he did his part to keep food on the table."

"Will any of this help?" Brook interrupted, "These don't... these aren't symptoms." The Skeleton ran a hand through his fro, his teeth setting in a way that must have been a frown, "This isn't... how will this help?!"

"We've gotta start somewhere ya bag o' bones," Franky snapped. "It's... we're doing a retelling..."

"A memory recall," Robin intoned, "We're going over things he told us about his life hoping to recall a clue or hint of anything that could tie any of this to his mother. Trigger more memories."

"This... this can't be enough!" Brook bemoaned, his voice coming out in a snap, his fist coming down on the railing of the Sunny.

"...It's enough..." Banchina whispered. She had said more, but Usopp had only been able to make out a few words. 

What was his Mom saying?

"W-what?"

"I am doing enough!" Banchina snapped, turned around to glare at Usopp. To glare. She'd never looked at him like that before. She'd never looked like this before. Her eyes had never been thin little slits, black and shining on a face with gnashed teeth, and sunken cheeks. But it was like that now.

He gripped the side of their table, surprised by the wild look in his mother's eyes. 

She was looking at him, and looking above him... her gaze was just unsteady. She wiped her nose, and muttered something under her breath, before tugging at her hair. "It's enough. We'll get by. It's enough."

Usopp's stomach was feeling funny. Bubbly and upset. It was spreading into his throat, making his voice small and tight. He didn't recognize himself when he whispered, "...Mama?"

"I AM DOING ENOUGH!" She roared, slamming her palms on their small kitchen table, and causing the top to shake.

Usopp snapped his hands away from the table, and pushed himself and his chair away. He was half way out of his seat, when his mother snapped her head around, leveling him with a glare, "What more should I do?!"

Usopp didn't understand why she was so angry.

"His mom got sick quick," Sanji suddenly spoke up, interrupting further outbursts.

"There was no big warning... He said she was coughing a lot, but he didn't know when it started. It just... started. And she got worse. The harder it got for the two of them to be on their own, the worse she got. She took no breaks. She had nosebleeds. And headaches..." Sanji rummaged a cigarette out of his front pocket and lit it. He didn't bring it to his mouth but stared at it. He watched it dwindle for a few seconds before saying, "But they were in need of money, so she didn't complain. She kept working. Doing odd jobs. Anything to pay off their little house... just in case, she would say."

"Baking," Luffy added.

"Seamstress," Chopper muttered.

"Gardening," Nami listed.

"Trash collecting," Zoro grunted.

"Launderer," Robin said almost on top of Zoro.

"...She did a lot of jobs," Sanji muttered keeping his gaze away from the rest of the crew as he finally put the cigarette in his mouth. He placed both his hands on the rail of the Thousand Sunny and leaned away, muttering, "And she worked until she dropped... so Long-Nose said." He did not look at the others, his voice suspiciously shaky.

"She worked until all that was left for them to do, was to hope... Yasopp would show back up before the end," Luffy mumbled, hesitant. As if the words he was saying weren't quite right. "He thought the mere sight of Yasopp and the pirate ship would make her feel better."

"Usopp thought Yasopp and the Red Hairs could save his mom," Chopper muttered.

No one said that what they were thinking.

A lie. A sweet lie.

Franky's expression was pinched, and slightly curious, "...Banchina was also a chemist of sorts."

"I'm doing everything I can, Usopp. EVERYTHING!" Banchina snapped, hands shooting out away from her body. As she waved her hands, her nose began to bleed. "It's not easy. It's not easy! It's just us right now, and we have to tighten the belt. We have to both do our parts!" Blood dripped down her cupid's bow, before sliding off her lips, and then down her chin. It hung like a red bead, before it dropped on the floor, and by the time it a had flattened into an irregular oval on the floor, Banchina was screaming again.

It didn't really make sense.

She wasn't making sense.

It was just loud. 

And scary.

And why was she so mad?

Mad at him?

What had he done?

"Mama, why... why are you mad? I just... I... I don't think you should be in the shed-" Usopp tried to explain. Surely, she just didn't understand what he was saying. This was a misunderstanding. The shed was the problem.

It was making her sick.

"What I make in the shed is the only thing keeping a roof over our heads!" Banchina's scream was piercing. It hurt his ears, and made him literally jump. Usopp had started to shake, and in his startled, frightened state, he'd jumped and knocked over his chair. The loud bang of the chair interrupted Banchina, and she turned her attention to it and screamed, "I don't need any comment from you now!"

Usopp slid across the wall until his hand found the door. 

His stomach was twisting and his throat felt tight. His mom was yelling at the chair now, but yelling about things that sounded like she was mad at Usopp for. He didn't want to be here anymore. He had to get out.

He grasped the knob of his front door and it swung out with a push.

He ran.

He ran, and ran, pretending he was running to something, and not from. There was adventure out there. The sea was calling. His 8,000 men needed him. He was running towards a ship shaped like a goat with a three headed monster on it that wanted to be his friend. For sure. He wasn't running away. Because he was brave.

Usopp wasn't scared.

He was not running away.

He didn't go home until it was almost dark.

All eyes shifted to Franky.

He rubbed the back of his neck, keeping quiet for a moment. How he and Usopp had gotten so close after such an auspicious start, Franky wasn't sure. But there were things he knew about Usopp that the others didn't always seem to notice. Or maybe Usopp just didn't feel like sharing. But there were times like this, Franky realized he knew a little bit more about their sniper.

Not ready to unpack what that could mean, or if it even meant anything, Franky kept talking, "She was a chemist of sorts... even taught him how to make smoke bombs. She knew how to do all sorts of things. From fun kids stuff, like soap that would shoot out of a jar like an explosion, to practical things like bug repellants. She'd lock herself in a shed she had out back and work for hours with the door shut, and come out smelling and coughing..."

Franky rubbed his arm uncomfortably, "...I asked Usopp once if he thought that made her sick. He just said she was coughing before. I... didn't pry." Franky let out a slow exhale, "I wonder what her ventilation was like. It's not good to work in a room without some sort of system-"

"Wait a minute," Jinbe interrupted, his face flinching as a sudden thought seemed to cross his mind, "His mother made smoke bombs?"

"Yeah," Franky answered slow, his face slightly exasperated, "Usopp had to learn some if it somewhere."

"Usopp was making smoke bombs on the beach the first time he got dizzy," Jinbe said, jabbing his forefinger into his opposite palm, a serious and anxious look flooding his face.

There was a beat, and then everyone was looking at each other. They'd all been looking elsewhere, but now their eyes met with hopeful alarm.

"...He's been using some local stuff instead of his normal supplies," Nami added, "Robin and I picked up dyes for him just recently from a little shop. From a creepy guy. Think, greasy ponytail, kind of yellowish skin."

"I had to fix his ventilation system. He said his bombs were coming out too smoky. Something wrong with the potassium chlorate he thought," Franky also added. Franky's shoulders stiffened, and he, Robin, and Jinbe shared an anxious look.

Franky shot Chopper a look, "You checking for just diseases or poison too?"

Chopper stared back at Franky, "Poison...?"

"Yeah... like chemical toxins in his blood. In his... in his urine. I think ya can test it for that."

Chopper shook his head, "A toxicology report like that might take up to ten days," Choppers hooved twirled and his eyes darted for a minute as he did some mental math, "Maybe I can push it out to three or five... but I would have seen some sign of it, if it was poison-"

"Would you automatically think to look for signs of poison here, on an island we're more or less vacationing at?" Robin interrupted.

Chopper deflated, looking slightly alarmed as he mentally began to compare some of Usopp's symptoms with some possibilities.

"If you expose yourself to shit chemicals, hell, any chemicals, you can get sick," Franky said taking a step forward towards Chopper, suddenly speaking more urgently. He pointed at the door, "Long time exposure to chemicals can make you sick for sure... but what if something was put in his stuff. What if someone was poisoning him."

"Chopper, I have a book..." Robin cleared her throat, "left over from when I worked with Crocodile. There are signs we can look for. The root of your hair becomes rough and brittle. Rings on your finger nails. Discoloration of the nails. Blue finger tips, and toes. Depending on what is used... normal flu like symptoms could be symptom of poison and not an ailment."

"Would checking Usopp's supplies give you a clue?" Brook asked, gesturing behind him, "One of us can go into his studio. Franky surely will know where he would keep his supplies."

"I've also got a book of dangerous poisons," Sanji offered, "Things you can get out of the ocean! Natural stuff, things you wouldn't know was bad until it's too late."

"And I've got one too. Mushrooms, other plants you can find in the forest." Chopper agreed. His eyes looked clear, a little more hopeful, and a little more upset, "I have plenty of information to pull from to get started."

"I know what it looks like when you've been poisoned in some cases, can I assist?" Robing asked, placing a hand on her chest as she took a step forward.

"Yes. Please come with me," Chopper opened up the door to the sick bay, and then pointed at Sanji, Brook, and Franky, "Get me Sanji's, and Robin's books. Also get me the supplies Usopp has been using to make his bombs. We can start with a litmus test, and move on from there with others. Hurry!"

With something stirring in the air, the crew scattered to go fulfil Choppers requests, and as the deck began to settle, Luffy addressed his remaining crew.

"Nami, Zoro, Jinbe..." 

Usopp slowly opened the door to his house.

It was almost dark outside.

Banchina was slumped against the table, a bowl of soup and bread waiting on the table. As the floor creaked, Banchina shot up, and stared at Usopp who stared back. He swallowed, and shut the door behind him, staying against it as she rushed over to him, and dropped to her knees in front of her son.

Usopp stilled, the door shutting behind him, nervous knots tying up inside of him.

"Mama is so sorry..." Banchina whispered, and upturned her palms for Usopp. She did not raise her hands to hug him, but kept her palms face up, inviting Usopp to come forward on his own. She would not force a hug, or his forgiveness.

He gave it anyway, not wanting his mother to be sad.

Cautiously, he encircled his arms around her neck, and she hugged him tight, tight. Her thin frame was shaking. He rubbed his hands up and down her back, feeling the bones of her spine. She was less soft than he remembered. Had his mother always been this thin? 

"I'm sorry Usopp... I'm sorry. But Mama has to do work in the shed. The work is helping us right now, while daddy is away at sea. We... I need to do extra work to help us... okay?" Banchina whispered, hugging Usopp hard, and kissing this side of his face repeatedly, "It's to help us."

When would Dad be back from the sea?

Why did he have to go?

Would they be okay?

There were many questions Usopp wanted to ask, but he stayed silent.

He didn't want to make his Mom mad again. 

It had been his fault earlier.

He wouldn't mess up up again.

"Okay Mama... Okay..." 

So he held her, and let all be forgiven. Let it all be forgotten. Something he wouldn't look at. Not even when he was older. He didn't bring up the shed again.

His Mother's anger... was too scary.

Even for a brave warrior of the sea.

Years later, a year before Luffy, Zoro, and Nami came into his life... Usopp tore down the shed.

Luffy's expression was grim. A war had been brewing on his face, and inside of him as well, but determination had beaten down despair. He was ready to do something. Anger. Sorrow. Worry. That could all be addressed another time. When there was more time. But there was no time now.

"I don't want to sit around. Nami, you know where Usopp was buying his stuff from. I want to go talk to the owner. The creepy guy. If he was giving Usopp something that was bad for him..." Luffy flexed his fingers, and his nostrils flared, "We're going to make them tell us. We're not going to wait days, we're going to find out now."

Nami, Jinbe, and Zoro only had one response.

"Right Captain!"

Chapter Text

Usopp's eyes opened.

His Mother is wiping a rag across his forehead, wearing a serious expression while Chopper is drawing blood from his arm. She hadn't noticed he was awake, so Usopp took his time looking at her for just a moment. Living in a quiet moment of being cared for.

His eyes drifted slowly to the corner, and he sees his other Mother and Sogeking standing quietly together. They drift closer as he looks at them.

"Mama," He says, his voice strange and raspy. "Mama..."

His Mother looks at him with wide blue eyes and draws closer to him, "Usopp. Usopp it's Robin... Do you know me?"

He knows her.

It's his mother.

Different than the one who died. Neither greater nor lesser, but his Mother still when he is feeling lonely. When he is quiet and thoughtful.

Mother. He had called her that once. Just once, when he was still sore from his apologies to his crew, and Merry's death still stung. She had taken an empty glass from him, and tucked a hair behind his ear, and he had called her Mama, and then they stared at each other in quiet shock. He'd been scared and fragile in a way that he thought he couldn't be, not after everything that had happened--but she kissed his forehead and pat his back. She had said nothing but sat with him, her arm around his shoulders, and she held him as he cried the few tears he still had left in him. They didn't speak about it.

But, every now and then, normally after a big fight, they would sit quietly together and she doted on him in her gentle and intelligent way. 

"This crew is your family," Sogeking said, his voice drawing Usopp out of his thoughts, and reminding him of his dry throat.

"Mama... 'm thirsty..." he rasps again, his need for water greater than his need to remember.

His Mother turns to Chopper and they whisper hurriedly to each other.

Banchina looms over Usopp like a dark shadow, her hand clasped with Sogeking, who watches Chopper and Robin talk. It feels like Sogeking wants to help him, help Usopp. But Banchina... she feels less friendly now. Maybe she wanted him to die and join her. Maybe heaven was lonely.

"Are you mad at me?" Banchina asks, voice neither upset nor curious. The question feels... bland. Devoid. Lacking in hope. Expectant of disappointment.

"No Mama... 'm not mad..." Usopp whispers and closes his eyes for a moment. He's hot and spinning, and the bed is rocking in a different way than he is. It's nauseating.

"Usopp... here. You can drink this. Drink a little..." Robin's many hands bloom beneath Usopp and gently move him to a more elevated position. His insides feel like goo and slosh uncomfortably inside of him. Moving around isn't ideal, but he can see the glass of water in Robin's hand and he is desperate. Once he's up, it takes another long moment before he can drink. But at last, he does, and the three pitiful mouthfuls he gets are like heaven.

"I left you," Banchina says, matter-of-factly, and unapologetically.

"You didn't want to. Dad wanted to," Usopp whispers.

"The sea called him..." Banchina agrees, smiling sadly, "...I did want to stay."

"You did," Usopp rasps, "But you didn't stay."

"U-Usopp?" Chopper chokes, "Usopp can you focus on me and Robin? We need to ask you some questions. Usopp!"

"Dad wanted to leave..." Usopp mumbles, "...I hate him."

"Usopp!" Robin and Banchina gasp. One with sorrow, and the other with anger.

The voices blend together, and Usopp closes his eyes, hot tears slipping down his cheek. Just three drops. Probably the same water he had just put inside him.

"You can be angry Usopp," Sogeking says, "You are allowed to be angry. Your parents made choices thinking about what was best for their growth... and not yours. Your anger is a consequence of their decision... and you have every right to it."

Banchina is angry at Sogeking's side, but she keeps holding his hand.

He is angry. He is sad, too. But he loved his dad, and he loved his mother. They were the sun and earth, and he was a moon that revolved around them both. How could he not love what he revolved around? But he was still angry... and they were both gone.

"Usopp..." Robin's watery voice is near his ear, "We're changing out you I.V., it'll be a pinch. But please... open your eyes. Longnose-Kun... please try and stay focused, just for a little bit. Please, please! Usopp!"

Usopp opens his eyes and looks at Robin.

Banchina and Sogeking are walking around the room, closer to Chopper who is scurrying around, his eyes wild and determined.

"Usopp!" Robin says until he's looking at her.

"Robin," Usopp whispers back, and she smiles with tears at the sound of her own name.

"Usopp, we need you to tell us about your mom," Chopper's voice is firm as he speaks up, his mouth full as he pulls a lid off of a bottle of liquid with his teeth, "About how she was before she died. Symptoms, Usopp. I need to know if the doctor told you anything about what your mom had. Did he name it?"

Usopp blinks lazily and lets his eyes drift up as he thinks of his mother.

She had gotten sicker and sicker as Yasopp's letters trickled to a halt. It was as if in correlation with the lack of news, Banchina was withering away. She had gotten so frail, and then was bedridden for a couple of months before the end. The doctor and a few volunteering moms from the island stayed with Banchina and Usopp during that time. Usopp had been glad for the help.

It kept his Mother out of the shed.

When Usopp was able to see Banchina again, she strangely looked stronger than the last time he had remembered. Her eyes were determined and clear, and even laying down, her posture seemed straight and proud. Less burdened. Her chin was raised, and she smiled at Usopp as he was allowed to visit her more in the last week of her life. He thought she might make it then. Well, he never thought she would die.

But in the end, looking... stronger and with such clear eyes, he thought all she needed was for Dad to come home. And then she'd get better. If the Pirate would only come... his Mother would get better.

"Usopp, keep talking," Robin encouraged, squeezing Usopp's arm.

"...I was talking?" Usopp mumbled, a little startled to hear Robin enter his thoughts. He'd been thinking, right?

"Yes, you're talking! Keep going," Robing encouraged, "Keep going!"

"...Tired now," Usopp sighed, "...and I don't remember where... I left off..." Usopp sighed. Any storyteller should know where he left off. He was sleepy now. Not good to tell a story when you're sleepy. Not unless everyone was tired. There is a rule for storytelling-Ow!

"Usopp, I'm sorry!" Chopper squeaked, and then Usopp jumped as something bit into his thumb a second time.

"Ow!" Usopp said aloud this time, and tried to pull his hand away from whatever Chopper had done, but Chopper held his hand in place. Usopp's thumb stung, and he pouted, as the minor stinging pain, which now caused his thumb to throb.

"Chopper!'

"Small painful stimuli to keep the patient up in dire circumstances," Chopper hissed as if he was out of breath, "Usopp! Keep telling me about Banchina! Did they say anything about what she had!?"

"Her lungs were inflamed," Usopp mumbled, sniffing as he felt suddenly rather petulant. Chopper had hurt him on purpose. That wasn't nice.

"They burned and hurt... it made her cough... and wheeze...." Usopp kept on, not sure why he was still going on. "Mom... mom had been sick. It was weird. It was like... she had a cold or flu... and it got... it changed. Her symptoms didn't match." Usopp squinted, "It was... a cold in the winter... but she was coughing blood in the spring... and angry and strange. She became strange. Her symptoms... didn't match..."

"Different... different symptoms?" Robin repeated, brow furred with confusion.

"Did your doctor think she had two things?" Chopper pressed. He was squeezing Usopp's hand, but that tight squeeze was starting to feel less and less annoying for the tired Usopp/

Robin pet Usopp's hair. Banchina was on the other side of Usopp, gently rubbing his chest.

"It was only supposed to be a cold. That first winter without your dad was hard," Banchina whispered.

"Many symptoms. But some didn't add up. They changed Usopp, just like you said." Sogeking hummed.

"...Her lungs were inflamed..." Usopp whispered, his surroundings getting too big. Too big for him to stay in. It was getting dark. The pain was dull and already gone. He was tired, so tired. "...too much smoke..."

"What? What was that?"

"Usopp!"

"Too much smoke... in the shed..." Usopp breathed, and then fell to sleep. The needle pricking his thumb, no longer enough to keep him awake and talking anymore.

Robin and Choppe both let out tense breaths as Usopp drifted back to sleep.

"It's fine. the medicine and his own weakness have him out... but he's stable," Chopper sighed, gently wiping a bit of blood from Usopp's thumb, before wrapping it up. When done, he wrapped up a small medical needle in a latex glove and threw that away as well.

It took Robin a moment before she felt able to speak, "Chopper, what are you suspecting?"

"...Usopp's lungs don't sound bad," Chopper said after a moment. And as if to prove what he was saying, pressed the stethoscope to Usopp's chest, "It's good... he lungs are clear... He had a tiny cough before coming to the island... but that really did clear up with the allergy medicine I gave him."

"And?" Robin pressed, as she looked at the serious reindeer's face.

"...After Franky's suggestion of poison, I started to think. I've been assuming Usopp's mom died of some ailment. I then assumed it was a hereditary illness that Usopp caught. But the symptoms Usopp is having..." Chopper shook his head, "It doesn't add up. It doesn't sound like a hereditary disorder that would take someone's life. His symptoms, at best, sounded like allergies or a bad cold. But when Usopp got worse, and things didn't add up... I was so set on Usopp having some passed down ailment... I didn't even think it could be something else."

Chopper turned and glanced at a row of tubes, all filled with Usopp's blood, "I looked on the surface. I looked at the easy symptoms. I forgot to look for outside influences... we're pirates, and Usopp makes a lot of chemical based weapons. Why did I forget to do a simple toxicology report?"

"Chopper..." Robin reached out and placed a hand on Chopper's back, "...we were all influenced by Usopp's own worries. He was talking to Jinbe, but we all heard him say he was going to die like his mother."

Chopper shook his head, "Doesn't matter. I'm the doctor. I'm this crew's doctor... I can't stumble around and make mistakes like this," Chopper took in a hot breath of anger, and then let it out slow, "I'm not going to get caught up in this mistake again. I'll do better. I won't be so shallow again."

Robin nodded her head, and stroked a hand up and down Chopper's back, before looking back to Usopp's face.

"It sounds like... to me... Usopp's mother had something else. Like she started out sick, and then was made worse by her work. The pesticides, and other chemistry based work she did in a shed," Robin guessed, "She had some illness, and because she refused to take a break, her work put her in danger. And made her worse..."

"And then by the time she got help, it was too late. She'd poisoned herself in a small town that didn't know how to help her... and with no ventilation system, no wonder her lungs got all burned up," Franky's voice floated from the door. He was peaking in the small door frame, his now more robust sized body unable to let himself fully inside the medical room. He held out two books, and shook his head, "She probably had a basic understanding of chemistry and just bullheadedly charged on. Tinkered and figured out what to do. Usopp was like that too when I first met him. He had talent for coming up with stuff... but not for making his design last or safe. I think his Ma was the same way... she had no idea how to keep herself safe."

Pursing her lips, and keeping her opinions to herself, for now, Robin got up and collected the books from Franky. She placed them on Chopper's little work desk, and opened up hers, and turned to the pages about poison. With her other hand, she opened up Sanji's book, and created a third eye on her palm. With the assistance of her third eye, she could start reading both books at once.

"It was a desperate situation. She needed money," Chopper said, his voice defensive, if only slightly.

"I know. Doesn't change the fact she didn't know what she was doing. The bull-headedness passed on to Usopp to..." Franky swallowed hard, "But I'm here now. Here to call him out when he ain't doing something right. I'll make sure he does whatever he wants to do right... and safe. I'm going to teach him... to do it all safe."

"This is all speculation," Chopper sighed, voice soft and hesitant, "Usopp's delirious... We're only guessing about his mom. And about him. All of this could matter, or it could not! It could be something else. It could still be an illness... something unknown."

"No... there's something off with that powder Usopp was sold," Sanji's voice cut through, and he pushed his way past Franky, Brook hovering outside with the cyborg.

Sanji, his hands coved in medical gloves, held up a few pieces of slightly damp colored paper. "Brook and I did the Litmus test on Usopp's supplies, just like you asked. Some of the acidity of his powders are off, specifically the yellow dye and the Potassium chlorate he purchased here from the island."

"Do you have some samples?" Chopper asked eagerly, taking up the litmus papers from Sanju so he could look over them himself.

Sanji nodded and held out two jars. A jar of a yellow powder, and another jar filled with a white and slightly grayish powder. Chopper held the items up and muttered, "I can do some wet chemical testing..." Chopper's head shot up, "Franky, can you take me below? I need to do some testing away from Usopp, and away from this equipment. Just to be safe."

"Yeah, come this way. We'll go to my shop."

"I can watch Usopp," Robin, Brook, and Sanji said at the same time, before looking at each other with a little surprise.

Chopper nodded, and sternly added, "Robin's in charge. But you come get me if anything goes wrong. If he wakes and panics, if something changes. Check his temperature every half hour, and his blood pressure every fifteen. ...Robin... there are straps on the bed for his wrists and ankles. Be prepared to use them if he gets violent." Chopper glared at Brook and Sanji, "Don't break any of the vials, or test tubes. Listen to Robin-whatever she asks."

"Right Chopper!"

"Yes, Chopper!"

Chopper hefted a bag up on his shoulder and hurried out of the room, Franky scooping him up so he could get Chopper to his destination faster.

"Got an idea Doc?" Franky asked, voice slightly hopeful,

"Yeah... Yeah I do," Chopper said, a determined fire brewing in his eyes. "Usopp's like this Mom... but this isn't an illness!"

Marah was the name of the island the Straw Hats had landed on: Marah.

Marah, the strange name that Robin was fascinated by. It was a name that meant "Bitterness." But the islanders had laughed and explained to any who asked, that their island was named after bitterness as a sort of charm. A charm to keep "bitterness" from coming. But with Nami showing the way to Mr. Agate's small firework stand; Luffy, Zoro, and Jinbe dutifully following behind her, "bitterness" was the thought that came to villagers' minds.

The menace dripping off the pirates shattered the cheery and relaxed atmosphere of the island and caused the villagers to close their doors and shut their windows, afraid of whatever wrath was marching through their town.

But when the small group, full of venom and anger boiling their blood stopped at Mr. Agate's shop, they were surprised to be greeted by a small, thin young man.

He was barely a man, but it was not his age that slowly tempered the determination and vengeance bubbling in the Straw Hats, it was something else.

The young man turned towards the small group approaching him, confused by their expressions, but not afraid. His black hair was pulled back in a slightly greasy queue, and his clothes hung a little too big on him. He was tired, bags sunken in heavily on his face, a black armband on his arm. Something about him was steeped with sadness. A sadness so great, that it cooled the anger, if just a little, of the four Straw Hats who had been expecting a fight.

"Excuse me... where is Mr. Agate?" Nami asked, Luffy coming to stand at her side.

The almost man swallowed, his adam's apple bobbing hard, "If you have somethin' of the shop you need, I'm afraid we've sold our stock back to popular chain on the island. Pop died three nights ago." The young man took in a breath, and straightened his back, "I'm his son, Jasper. If you've got an order already bought, I can point you out to the shop owner who now holds everything you need. I can pull out your old receipts and make sure-"

"Hold it!" Nami interrupted, "I was here just days ago! Mr. Agate seemed in good health. What do you mean he died a few days ago?!"

Jasper's chin wobbled, and he narrowed his eyes, "It's a family matter-"

Luffy's hand shout out and caught Jasper by the front of his robes. He pulled the young man close and brought them chest to chest. Glaring down, Luffy spoke, his voice crisp and sharp. "Your old man... did he get nosebleeds? Fever? Hallucinations?"

Jasper's alarmed expression twisted into one of anguish, and with a shaking hand, he grabbed ahold of Luffy's red shirt, "Y-You! You know what happened to my Pop!?"

"No," Luffy answered calmly, seemingly undisturbed by the young man's grasp, "But my Nakama is very sick, sick after some stuff he bought at this stand. And I came to see what your dad did."

Jasper's face became mortified, and his went from pale to purple in a few seconds.

"What... what my... my dad...?" Jasper sputtered. His fist tightened on Luffy's shirt, "My dad would never do anything to anyone! He'd never harm a flea on a fly's ass! He was stubborn, grumpy, and tired... but my dad... my pop was a great man!" Jasper's voice rose into a roar, his eyes blazing with outrage and honesty. Tears welled in his eyes, "No matter how bad our store was doing, no matter how much more popular Gemma's Groceries were... Pop always ensured we got by! He was open every day! Rain or snow! Dad did his best to sell, and to sell honestly! He never overcharged and always... he always put the customers first. That was my Pop! He's not a bad man, and if you're accusing him, barely cold in his grave of doing something evil... I'll... I'll..."

Jasper choked, his threat hanging unfinished. Luffy stared into Jasper's eyes, who glared back defiantly, ready to defend his father to the bitter end

The air was tense, and then Luffy swatted Jasper's hand away from him. Jasper took a step back, and Luffy took a step forward. Luffy then dropped to his knees, before bowing low, his brow pressing to the ground.

"Luffy!" Nami gasped, echoed by Jinbe.

Zoro, chose to kneel behind his Captain, already understanding Luffy's thoughts.

Unperturbed by his crew behind him, Luffy spoke up, "I'm sorry. I don't know your dad, so I'm not going to judge him. But if he suffered from what my Nakama suffered from, I'd like to hear it. I want to hear everything. My Nakama is sick, and I won't let him die. Please tell me all that has happened-small or big! I'll do anything to save Usopp! Please talk to us, and help us. I beg you."

Jasper stood, uncertain, nervously looking at the bowed rubber-man, and then to Zoro who was knelt behind him. He jumped, his mouth opening as Jinbe and Nami followed suit.

"Please," Nami and Jinbe said together, their hands placed before them on the ground, "tell us anything you know."

It was silent for a moment as Jinber stared at the people who moments ago had seemingly come looking for a fight. But now... they were all bowed in front of him, asking for him. Him. The son of a man who owned a simple firework stand.

Jasper rubbed the back of his neck, and then turned from the group, opening the door to the small closed down stand, "Come inside... we'll have a long talk. I'll tell you what I can."

Chapter Text

Half an hour after Chopper left, Robin started to roll back the blankets from Usopp's bed. He was sweating so much that he glistened, even in the low light of the sick bay. His hair was heavy and dripping with sweat, and Robin lightly brushed aside a salt soaked curl with a bad feeling curling in her gut.

Usopp was getting worse.

"What are you doing Robin-chwan? How can I help?" Sanji asked as he jumped to his feet to roll back the covers with her. His hands were a little flimsy; flighty. Like an anxious bird fluttering about, but he was eager to help.

"Usopp's breathing sounds more labored than before, and his skin feels on fire..." Robin answered, as she pressed her palm to Usopp's forehead, "He's burning with fever. I think a cool bath will help him feel a little better. And if we get him up for a little bit, that might be better on his lungs."

"I don't think we should carry him to the bath..." Sanji muttered, and then turned to Brook, "Brook. There's a big wooden tub I use to hold potatoes in the kitchen pantry. Dump it, and fill it with cool water, if you please."

"Of course Sanji! Anything to help out!" Brook quickly gathered himself to his feet, and took off in a long-legged sprint.

"I don't know if the cool water will be good for him if there's something in his lungs..." Sanji admitted to Robin.

"We'll have to be careful," Robin agreed, borrowing a stethoscope from Chopper's desk. She pressed it to Usopp's chest and listenys to his lungs. She's no Chopper, but she knows enough about what a wheeze sounds like, and Usopp's lungs sound clear. "I'm not sure what is making his breathing sound so rough, but his lungs seem clear. I don't think a cool bath will hurt him."

Sanji nods, trusting Robin more than his own opinion.

Rushing back to the door Brook had run through, Sanji called out after him, "Call for me when you're outside! I'll help you get the tub in!"

With a pull, Robin had Usopp's feet out from under the covers and quickly began to remove his socks. Once both were off, she pointed to Usopp's feet, "Look at his toes..."

Sanji came back to Usopp's bedside and looked at Usopp's toes. Sanji wasn't sure what he was looking for at first, and then he saw them. Usopp had white banding on his toenails, and the knuckles of his toes were purple and black, as if bruised.

"Bruising?" Sanji wondered, hovering a nervous hand over Usopp's feet. He did not dare to touch them, worried he could cause Usopp more pain than the young man was already in.

"Something to report to Chopper when he comes back," Robin sighed, frustrated at her own lack of answers. She gestured to Usopp, "Help me with his clothes. We can towel him off while we wait for Brook. Wiping his sweat, will at least feel much better."

"Here, you hold him up and I'll strip him. He'll be less embarrassed about it if he knows I did it later," Sanji suggested, and Robin nodded her head with compliance. She positioned Usopp against her body while Sanji worked with the fly of Usopp's pants. "Look at this Long-nose. Robin-chwan is going to give you a bath, you lucky dog. You better appreciate it, and my good graces in allowing it!"

Teasing the unconscious sniper comforted Sanji as he worked.

Sanji's head is bent down, when he feels a heavy damp hand fall on the back of his head.

Startled, Sanji looked up and into Usopp's dark black eyes. Like ink stains on a pale canvas, Usopp's eyes gaze out at Sanji. His gaze is slightly watery and bleary, and Sanji just knows that Usopp is not really seeing him.

As off-putting as the stare is, Usopp being awake, stirs Sanji's heart and gave him a fluttering bit of relief.

"Usopp?" Sanji whispered, Robin echoing him.

"I hate you," Usopp says.

And it's awful. It's awful and quiet. And it's firm, even if it's soaked in sadness, even as it sounds defeated.

"I hate you," Usopp says again, and Sanji feels a stab in his chest.

The cook is frozen, and the glass inside of him pierces as it breaks.

"Usopp!" Robin gasps, voice stricken, her eyes going to Sanji's troubled face.

"You left," Usopp whispers, and pulls Sanji's hair, "You left me... and she died."

Sanji chokes on a shakey breath.

Usopp was talking about his father... he was talking about his father, and not him.

The relief is so strong it burns, and Sanji would like to collapse from the relief of it not being him, Usopp was talking to. For a horrifying moment; for a chilling moment, Sanji won't soon forget, Sanji thought Usopp was talking to him. Talking about when he had left them to handle Big Mom, and that whole... fiasco. They didn't talk about it much, and Sanji worried about it in the back of his mind. Worried he was hated, by any number of his crew, and for a moment he really thought he had the proof that his deeds had shifted his friend's feelings.

"U-Usopp! It's me! Sanji," Sanji whispered, voice trembling with relief, "It's not... I'm not your father."

He's desperate for Usopp to see him.

"Sanji," Usopp echoes after a beat, a hand still tugging on Sanji's hair. And then Usopp smiles, just like he always does at Sanji. A great big beam of joy and then Usopp half sings, "Sanji! I like Sanji!" It's the same tone he uses when he praises Sanji's cooking, or when he tries to ask for something extra to eat, or when he wants to be protected.

It's a joy to hear it.

Sanji is smiling, and Robin laughs her voice a little watery.

"That's right Usopp," Robin whispers adoringly into the top of Usopp's damp hair, resisting, just barely, kissing the top of his head.

"That's good, that's good," Sanji says, still smiling as he goes about stripping Usopp from his clothes. He's grinning big now, and the chill he had, is gone.

"And do you like Robin?" Robin asks slyly, unable to resist compelling some praise from the Sniper.

Usopp tries to look back at her, but gives up after a few weak attempts of trying to turn his head over his shoulder to find her. He keeps playing with Sanji's hair and mutters, "Yeah, I love Robin. She's awesome. Mom doesn't like Robin though." And then Usopp's gaze shifts to the leftmost corner of the room. He looks sad at whatever he sees.

Robin's expression becomes tight, and coldly she says, "I'm not quite sure I like her either."

Usopp snorts through his nose, and continues looking at the left corner of the room. He stares for a while seeing something no one else is seeing. Maybe hearing something too. He snorts, and laughs a little again, and then tugs at Sanji's hair again, "I love all my Nakama."

"We all love you too," Robin says, patting Usopp very gently, codling him like a child. There is an argument brewing inside her. She shouldn't, and can't really fight with the past. Can't fight with a ghost. But the more she hears about Usopp's mother, the more she thinks about her own. The more she remembers the pain of being left behind, and she hates it.

She squeezes Usopp's shoulder and thinks, 'But at least I was left with someone. I wasn't alone. I had friends, even if my aunt was cold and uncaring, there were friends for me on that island. Professor Clover was there. But Usopp's mother... you left your boy completely alone!' And this is unfair of her, because no one knows when their time will come. No one knows when they'll die. But she wishes Banchina had done something for Usopp, just a little more. She wishes anybody had.

Usopp looked back in the corner of the room, and Sanji takes a glance as well.

It's just an empty corner, but to Usopp, it's something else. He'd block Usopp's view of it if that helped him somehow.

"See someone?" Sanji asked trying to keep his voice controlled, his eyes still looking for the things Usopp is seeing.

"They're watching me. They haven't left me," Usopp answers, and he closes his eyes for a moment, his head reclining onto Robin's chest.

"Who is it?" Robin presses, although she has suspicion of who one of them is.

Usopp doesn't answer, but eventually opens his eyes and looks back in the corner. He is listening to whoever is in the corner talking to him.

Robin has an irrational fear cross her mind. A fear of ghosts taking Usopp away. Luring him through a veil that she and the others can not follow. She closes her eyes and shakes her head. No.... no. It'll be alright. She looks at Sanji and sees he is following Usopp's gaze as well. He looks as uncomfortable as she feels. 

Sanji finally shakes his head, and removes Usopp's pants; tossing them into a pile on the floor.

"Let's lift your arms up now, Usopp!" Sanji suggests, hooking his hands under the hem of Usopp's shirt, "We're taking off your shirt now."

Usopp doesn't lift his arms. He keeps one hand planted in Sanji's hair, and stares at the gold he weaves through his fingers. With obvious reluctance, he looks back at the corner of the room, listening quietly to words only he can hear. His unseeing eyes fill with tears, and his chin wrinkles as he fights off a sob.

"Mama... I don't want to join you. I don't want to die."

It was instantaneous.

Sanji surges forward and crushes Usopp in a hug, tucking Usopp's face against his chest, protecting him from whatever he is seeing. He turns to glare over his shoulder, staring at the corner of the room, eyes dancing in the empty spot as if he expected to see someone. Expects someone, to reveal their laughing face, and present themselves as a target, so that he can destroy them. Robin, at the same time, had curled one arm around Usopp, and waved her other hand, creating several limbs in the corner Usopp was staring at. The limbs form a cacoon as if they were sealing whatever was standing in the corner away.

"No!" Robin says, urgent and sincere, "No."

"You're not going anywhere," Sanji reassured Usopp, his blood pumping in his ears.

"She can't have you. She will have to wait," Robin agrees fiercely, glaring at the corner.

Usopp sobs weakly, and nuzzles into Sanji's neck, "I'm hot..."

The weak whimper unwinds Robin and Sanji slowly. They can't focus on Usopp's nightmares, they have to focus on what's really going on with him.

Sanji and Robin sigh and shake off their unease as best they can. Robin's hands disappear, and Sanji forces Usopp's shirt off. They both know they are being a little ridiculous, but for Usopp, neither of them can help it.

"We'll get you cooled down," Sanji promises, just as Brook begins tapping at the door.

"Hello, hello! open up in there! I've returned with a full scrub-a-dub service for Usopp!"

"I'll get it," Robin says, getting up from her seat to let Brook in. 

Sanji holds Usopp as he cries, and gently he presses a towel to Usopp's cheek and brow, wiping away some sweat. Gentler than Sanji thought he was capable of, he shushes Usopp, "Usopp... don't be afraid. Don't be afraid. You'll be okay."

"You're lying," Usopp whispers, hiding under Sanji's chin, curling into a ball, "They'll take me away. Take me to the bottom of the sea. Merry. Merry, will be my bed. I don't want to go... not yet. I'm not ready!"

"You won't! You're not going to go!" Sanji growls, encircling Usopp closer to him, "We're going to save you Usopp! We're going to cure you, and we'll fix this. You're not going anywhere!"

"Mama... Mama... please don't make me go. I want to stay," Usopp whispers, turning his face into Sanji's chest even more. His nose is bending at a painful angle, and the way his hands cling to Sanji's shirt is heartbreaking. His shoulders shake as he trembles and shies away from that same corner of the room.

Sanji has had enough of this room.

"Brook, Robin-chwan, leave the tub out on the deck," Sanji commands as he hoists Usopp up into his arms bridal style, "Let's get out for some fresh air!"

Brook sputters in slight confusion, but Robin glances back at Sanji, and then down to Usopp. She nods, and gently convinces Brook to back up, "It won't be far. Just outside Chopper's office. We'll get him in the tub, cooled off, dried off, and then back to bed."

"Five minutes away from this room, might bring Usopp some peace," Sanji says, a growl starting from somewhere in his chest. It would certainly bring Sanji some peace!

He holds Usopp close, protecting him from the ghosts hiding in the corner.

The ghosts, only Usopp can see, but that Sanji will damn sure protect Usopp from.

"You're not going anywhere Usopp."

Jasper spoke for a long time in the remains of his father's little stand.

He talked about his dad, Ronin Agate, a man who had once had the honor of crafting all the cannons on Gol D. Roger's final ship. He hadn't even been eighteen years old, and he had somehow been impressive enough to help design some key weaponry for Gol's ship, Oro Jackson. Jasper had even shown a single framed schematic, the last remaining item in the firework hut, that had the signatures of those that had worked on the ship. Luffy stared a long time at the sloppy signature of, "Tom," and the neat tiny script next to it, "Ronin A." A few other names scattered around the signatures.

Luffy stared at those two names sitting side by side and wondered if Ronin had ever known what had become of the Fish-man Franky had once looked up to.

Jasper kept talking. Little things, mixed with big things. A father who stayed behind, and never went for his own dreams. He had siblings to raise. And then a wife to look after. And then children. His smile became heavier, his attitude grimmer, but when asked he would say, "I am loved, and I have it. It's all a man needs."

Ronin Agate had wanted to be a pirate. But family was first. He resisted the call of the sea, but in his younger years, made sure others were able to set sail and chase their own dreams. Jasper thought it weighed on his father, to stay behind, but Ronin Agate never abandoned his family. Even when business got bad, and times were tough. When his siblings moved away. When his own three children were grown, and encouraged him to set sail, if just for a little while... Ronin Agate stayed behind. He stayed with his family.

He stayed behind and supported pirates in his own way. With Ammo, with chemical mixtures that made for great defensive and offensive attacks, strange contraptions that he liked to make, beautiful fireworks, and a gruff, "Good luck on your journey." He was surly, in his later years. He had lived his hard life, and the only thing he had left to show for it, was a few framed blueprints and a small firework stand...

"But we made due," Jasper whispered reverently, "We made due..." Jasper swallowed and ducked his head, "And then Gemma's Groceries popped up on the island. She made a big super store, that had... everything. All the other shops began to close up under her massive store, and she created a chain on the island. I think our store survived on loyalty from older clientele alone... but we're not popular with the younger generation. Pops is-" Jasper swallowed, "Was a grump. These past two years... it's been a struggle, but we did our best."

"Why not leave?" Jinbe spoke up, voice quiet and respectful, "If things were hard here, why not go to another island?"

"Pop's pirate friends always visited him here," Jasper answered sincerely, "He's helped many a pirate on the sea, and Pops waited for them to come back, so he could check up on them. There were a few people he was still waiting to hear from. Pops said he didn't get to travel with them... b-but they were his Nakama. And he said the least he could do was wait for them, and make sure to buy them a drink." Jasper laughed as tears filled his eyes, and he lowered his voice in clear mockery of his dad's own words, " 'If they're willing to carry my spirit out there, I can at least wait for them and buy them a couple of strong spirits when they return!' That was Pop..."

"Thank you for sharing your father with us," Luffy said, looking away from the framed blueprint, "Please... can you tell us how he died?"

Jasper bowed his head low into his chest.

"It's been happening for a month..." Jasper whispered after a shakey exhale, "Pop's suppliers were getting fewer. He was having to do trade with different posts... and then one day a shipment didn't come in at all. We were getting choked out... At over double the price, he bought supplies from Gemma, of Gemma Groceries, just so he could keep some items on the shelf. It was really shoddy stuff. It smoked weirdly and was hard to use. Even though Pop paid her a ridiculous price, Gemma threw the Potassium Chlorate in his face, ripping the bag. Half of it spilled, and she just laughed. "Shady product for a shady character." He just took her insult and left."

Jasper hit his fist against the ground, "I wish dad didn't have to stand the insult... but he just took it! He always just... he let her say whatever she wanted! That he was underhanded, that he was shady, that he was an ass! She had no good thing to say about him, and made dad seem like... like a cheat and a sleaze!" Jasper sighed, and looked up, his eyes not seeing the pirates before him, "But Pop said that people who got to know him would see the real him. They could be the judges. It didn't matter what she said..."

Jasper shook his head, "But... but anyway... after she gave him the supplies, Pops began to have a difficult time. He wouldn't let me or my siblings help make his supplies anymore. He started... keeping to himself. Even avoiding Mom. Speaking to things not there. His skin got waxen and kinda yellow... and he'd cough into a handkerchief and not let anyone clean it..."

Nami, Zoro, Luffy, and Jinbe listed, their spines stiff, and skin prickled at the similarities they were beginning to hear.

Jasper droned on, unaware of their shocked stares, "He became reclusive and even more aggressive. And then... just a few days ago, he... he went.... went wrong," Jasper's voice got quiet, "He knocked over all his chemistry sets, and destroyed our remaining supplies. He... he went to Gemma's store and was screaming all sorts of slurs and obscenities at her. She didn't even come outside. I tried to stop him with my older brothers, but Dad threw us off..." Jasper shook his head, "He kept screaming and then... then he died rambling and... and saying weird stuff. The town said he went crazy from being driven out of business. A local doctor said it was a heart attack brought on by his illness and stress... it was the explanation for his sudden outbursts."

Jasper shook his head, clearly uncertain if he believed the doctor's conclusions.

"Can you tell us some of the things he said?" Zoro asked, his blood pounding loud in his ears as an uncomfortable idea began to form in his head, as anger began to boil from the bottom towards the top.

Jasper blinked, seeming to become aware of the others' presence. He looked at their faces, and then wiped his wet eyes, "Well... It was all just... just weird stuff. He was seeing things at the end. He kept saying things that didn't make sense. Talking to himself... Seeing things that weren't there!"

Luffy knelt down, suddenly very close to Jasper, eye to eye and nose to nose.

"Jasper," Luffy said. Just the young man's name, just a name with an unspoken command.

Staring at Luffy's burning gaze, Jasper whispered, "He said... he said, "Why? It can be me. It can be just me, but don't involve anyone else. He's just a boy, not even from here." " Jasper closed his eyes, "I tried to ask him what he meant... but he couldn't... it's like he couldn't see me, or anyone anymore. He just continued to ramble about Genma! "Gemma he's done nothing." and then.... he got still, and... and he started to cough more blood, and his nose was gushing... and he fell down." Jasper broke his gaze from Luffy, and closed his eyes, "And then... then he said Mom's name. Penny. He said... "Penny, you and them are better than a dream." and then... then he was gone."

The hut was silent as all of Jasper's story was absorbed. As the conversation was taken in, as small blanks were filled, as more blanks appeared, as dots were connected, as t's were crossed, as the great tangle of a mystery was beginning to be undone, Luffy stood up and stared at the door that led back outside.

"Gemma," Luffy growled. "Gemma," he said again, the name of the connecting thread he kept seeing sticking out of this woven tail. "Gemma!" He howled as a bad and familiar feeling of betrayal curled in his gut, a feeling that was like an alarm. 

Jasper looked at Luffy's rigid back confused, not having enough information to connect all the dots. Still lost in the mourning of losing his father. Still unaware.

Tears streaming down her face, Nami reached out for Jasper's hands and took it in her own. He jumped, but Nami smiled patiently at him, "You kept... saying your Dad didn't fulfill his dream. I hope you realize... he was trying to tell you, you and your mom and your siblings... you were all better than any dream. You were his big beautiful reality, and no dream was better than that. Your dad... was happy."

Jasper stared at Nami, and then his face crumpled, and he let out a wretched sob, and held Nami's hands as if in prayer.

Zoro and Jinbe stood slowly, great veins in their necks starting to stand out against their throats, as their jaws tensed with anger.

"I... believe we have a case of someone trying to take out their smaller competition," Jinbe said slowly, a hand reaching to open the hut door. "And they got Usopp and this underserving family involved in their petty greed."

Zoro rest a hand against his swords, and they tightened as he added, "There's no proof. But that old man's actions and last words... that sounds like someone, who knows something was done to him, and someone else."

"And he begged for Usopp's life and not his," Luffy growled, stepping into the light as Jinbe opened the door of the hut with a flourish.

Tugging his hat down on his head, Luffy snarled, "Jasper! Point out Gemma's store!"

Chapter Text

With Usopp placed safely in the cool water of the tub, Robin, Sanji, and Brook worked on getting Usopp washed clean of all his sweat.

"He's warm all over," Sanji muttered disparagingly as he tied a towel around Usopp's waist.

"We can't leave him in the tub for long," Robin sighed looking around the deck, "I don't want him to catch a chill out here."

"I can't believe he'd catch one with how hot he is! His fever seeps all the way to my bones!" Brook proclaimed, clearly so worried, that he did not even bother to point out his skull joke.

"Just a little while longer in the tub... maybe he'll fall asleep..." Sanji muttered, gently placing a rag over Usopp's eyes. Usopp's eyes were gazing to the left, and he wasn't blinking. He just kept staring at something out of sight, something that scared him. Threatened him.

"Don't look at that anymore Usopp. Go back to sleep," Sanji encouraged Usopp softly, willing the sniper to find some peace.

Usopp said nothing back in return.

"His hair is heavy with sweat..." Brook muttered, holding Usopp's great mane of hair in his hands. Brook shook his head, "No, no... that won't do. Sanji, would you please go get the large cup I keep in the shower? As well as the container with my name on it?"

Sanji nodded, his eyes still on Usopp, "Yes, of course." He hesitated a moment longer and then left, quickly headed in the direction of their bathroom.

"What are you going to do?" Robin asked Brook curiously.

"If I had thought about this sooner, I would have given Usopp's hair a good washing, and braided it all down, so it was out of his way. Back when this began... So that when he felt better, he could clean and treat it to his preference." Brook muttered, gently touching one of Usopp's limp and frizzy curls, "But for now, we can at least rinse his hair of all the sweat, and I can do a two stranded twist... anything else would take too long." Brook chuckled, "Not that this won't take a little time, but that's alright. It'll help him keep cool, and his hair tidy."

Robin smiled at Brook, her expression unexpectedly tender, "He'll really appreciate it."

Brook chuckled to himself, the sound almost musical, "I'm sure he will. From one curly haired man, to another."

Sanji returned promptly with a large plastic cup, and a small Tupperware filled with what looked like shampoo.

Brook accepted the items, and lightly shook the Tupperware, "My own homemade conditioner. Mixed by my own bones!" Brook let out a chirpy "Yohohoho," and then proceeded to get to work. Scooping water out of the tub, he poured the water over Usopp's hair, finger combing his phalanges through Usopp's scalp. Usopp snorted slightly, a small sound that let them know he was still awake. But he did not pull away, instead, he titled his face towards Brook's hands.

"Rest now Usopp, Brook has you now," Brook mumbled, his voice rich with affection.

With curiosity Sanji and Robin watched Brook work.

With nimble practiced precision, Brook rinsed Usopp's hair clean of his sweat, and then lightly pat and squeezed Usopp's hair dry. Opening his Tupperware, he took a dollop of the conditioner and worked it into Usopp's scalp, and then began to pull strands of Uospp's hair into careful twists.

It wasn't until Brook started to half sing, that Sanji and Robin quit staring. They caught each other's eyes, and both blushed, both a little embarrassed for their staring. It had been... not interesting, because that word would have made the touching moment between Brook and Usopp a spectacle... but it had been moving. They had both been moved, watching Brook take the time to care for Usopp's hair in the young sniper's stead. It was an intimate gesture, and it was moving to be part of it.

But now both adverted their eyes, cook and archaeologist both feeling that if they stared any longer, it would be impolite.

"That conditioner, is that the special care you talked about in regards to keeping your afro healthy for Laboon?" Robin asked, looking up at Brook's face.

The skeleton smiled, something the Straw hats always felt and never really saw, "Yes. I must keep it healthy. I want Laboon to recognize his old friend... even if I've changed."

"If your play him something, or sing, I'm sure he'll recognize you," Robin says kindly.

"You're unforgettable," Sanji adds, smiling brightly, the first big smile he had managed in the past couple of days.

"Yohohohohoho! Well, you're both going to make this skeleton blush!" Brook chuckled, tilting Usopp's head carefully.

Usopp let out a soft contented sigh, his body sagging further into the tub, and into the skeleton's hands.

"I think he fell asleep!" Sanji hissed, marveling at all the tension that just seemed to bleed out of Usopp.

"Good... good," Brook murmured, his focus still on Usopp's hair.

Eventually, Usopp had to be removed from the tub, his friends fearing they would make him sicker if he stayed in the water too long. With mild difficulty, they dressed Usopp in pajamas while Brook kept ahold of his hair. It took some extra hands from Robin, but they managed it in the end. And after a hurried dash back into Chopper's office, they had a blanket to keep Usopp wrapped in while Brook finished with the twists.

"What's going on?" Franky asked, just as Brook finished with Usopp's hair.

"Brook thought he would be more comfortable with his hair braided and clean," Robin answered. She straightened her back, and rolled her shoulders feeling a little stiff from all her haunched over worrying, "Any news?"

Franky looked at Usopp for a moment longer, just long enough to watch Brook lay Usopp's head down on a pillow Sanji had also brought top deck. When Usopp's head was on the pillow, Franky looked out at his friends, "Chopper thinks he might have this thing figured out."

Sanji stood up sharply, just as Brook and Robin's heads snapped to stare at the cyborg.

"Figured out?"

"What is it?"

"Franky, please! Tell us!"

Franky held up a hand, gently and without words quieting the others. His glasses had been covering his eyes, and very carefully he took them off so he could look at his friends. His eyes were red, and some tears clung to his lower lids. He was completely serious as he began to explain.

Usopp was sitting somewhere in a white space.

Familiar and unfamiliar hands were touching his hair. Weaving his hair into something else.

His mother's voice was singing somewhere, singing about the son of a gun, the son of a son of a sailor. Every now and then, she'd lightly tickle his baby hairs, and coo over the precious curl and new growth.

"Just like you Usopp, your hair is growing like a weed," Banchina would sigh, "Wait until your father sees it."

"He'll never see it," Usopp says.

Answering the voice of a ghost that is not here.

"He'll never see it."

"No. He probably won't," Sogeking answers back, his voice grim.

Usopp looks up and sees his mother. She is grotesque and as large as Kuma, the beast of a man who still haunts Usopp's dreams at times. Still looms over him with his outstretched hand that had sent him far from his friends for long painful years. Her body is now thick across the shoulder, chest, and waist. She is stretched out in all the wrong ways, her knuckles are dragging to the ground, and her legs are bowed and bent. Strangely her face is all blacked out as if Usopp can't look that high to see her face. As if a shadow has clouded it.

In one hand she has a grip on Sogeking, and she hangs him up in the air near her face.

Sogeking looks at Usopp, and shakes his head, "I can not help you anymore. Be brave Usopp. Be brave."

Banchina, his mother, the monster, lifts Sogeking up to her mouth. Her jaw unhinges, and black fangs snap off his head in one bite. His mask goes flying, and skids to a stop at Usopp's feet. Usopp looks at it and then tries to lift it. It is as if it is glued to the ground. As his mother feasts on Sogeking, he struggles with the mask.

Finally, the mask comes free, and his hands ache to touch it. He had bashed the mask into a shadow next to him, and the other side had clipped another shadow on Usopp's right. He hadn't even realized shadows were next to him until the mask had finally come loose, and cut through the shadows' forms.

He cries as with his aching hands, he wipes the blood from Sogeking's mask.

"You helped me save Luffy. You helped me save Robin... wearing you... gave me courage. Being you, gave me courage. I don't want you to die, I want you to stay with me... I want you to be a part of me, forever! You will, won't you?" Usopp sobs, his ears flooded with the sound of his mother chewing through Sogeking's body.

Usopp lifts the mask to his lips and consumes it. Determined to keep a part of Sogeking with him. He feels the mask warm and glow as he swallows. He'll keep Sogeking forever.

"You're a disappointment," Banchina belches, spitting out a piece of Sogekings cape.

Usopp looks up.

"Lying. Cowering. It was better to die, than to watch you grow up into...  this..." Banchina says with disgust, waving a meaty hand at Usopp dismissively. "No wonder your father stopped writing. No wonder he never came back home. You're a mess."

Usopp rose to his feet, feeling wobbly and uncertain. He kept his gaze on the monster's face, staring at her as she loomed over him. Her dark figure was seeping black into the white. The white space was going to be swallowed up by her. And so was he.

"You should just die. You're sick anyway. Just let go!" Banchina roars.

Usopp curls his fist into a ball, and his hand bleeds.

"USOPP!"

"USOPP!!"

Usopp opens his eyes. He is not in the white, but standing on the deck of Sunny... well no. Not the Deck. But the railing. He has a sword in his hand, not by the handle, but by the blade. He teeters towards the water, his feet unsteady as he tries to keep his footing. His hands hurt.

Feverishly he looks in front of him and sees some of his friends staring horrified at him.

Brook is on the ground, Sanji supporting his arm and holding him up, while Brook clutches his head. He's not bleeding, but he seems stunned. Robin has tears in her eyes and she is holding her face, her lip split. Franky is helping her up.

One of them has screamed his name but he doesn't know why. He doesn't know...

His hands hurt.

He looks back down at his hands.

His left is curled around a blade, and he finally recognizes it as Brooks. It is bloody as he grips it, the blade dug in so far into his palm and the crease of his fingers, that a brief thought of his fingers falling off crosses his mind. His right hand, which also hurts, is bloodied at the knuckles. As if he'd hit...

"No," Usopp wheezes. He looks at Brook, and then to Robin. She's bleeding, and Brook is holding his head. Had he...?

"Yes." The monster affirms behind him, "You bastard. You son of a bitch. Son of a pirate. You hurt them."

"No!" Usopp's voice climbs higher, not yet a scream.

His skin hurts. His chest hurts. his muscles are tensing and expanding and trying to rip him apart. He's changing. He's becoming a monster. A monster. He's not dying, he's becoming a monster. It would be better to die. Better to die than become a monster!

"Usopp stop!" Sanji's voice cracks as he cries out to him.

"Usopp Bro, calm down! Whatever you're thinking---stop!" Franky rumbles, Robin being hoisted up in one of his arms, as he takes a large step forward, his other hand reaching out for Usopp. "Usopp-whatever you're thinkin' is wrong! Don't move! Don't!"

"All they ever do for you is give. Give. Give. Give! And look at you. You attacked them," Banchina hisses in his ear, her voice so loud his ears are ringing.

"Usopp!"

"You lied about being sick. You lied about how you were feeling. Liar, liar, pitiful liar!" His mother's sweet voice is monstrous. As monstrous as the day when he was a child and she had roared at him. Had begged him to tell her what to do.

"I did... I did..." Usopp is gasping, and the world is swaying and changing. He hurt his Nakama. He always hurts them. With his lies. With his lack of bravado. With his weakness. With this illness. He'd be better off...

"Usopp, get down from there!"

"Don't you move bro, I'm coming to ya!"

"You betrayed Luffy long ago, and just like before... you've betrayed him again. Look what you've done. Look what you've done. How can you live with yourself? You know what Usopp? Son of a son of a sailor? You shouldn't."

Usopp is screaming.

He hit them. He hit his friends. He was becoming a monster.

He should die.

Just die!

It was this voice in his head.

It was these things he was seeing.

It needed to stop.

"It has to stop!" Usopp croaked, curling his other hand around the blade of his pilfered sword.

Someone screams as Usopp squeezes the blade with both hands, his hands shredding under it with ease. He has to make it stop. Maybe if... Maybe if...

"My ears. My eyes. If I can't see... if I can't hear..." Usopp babbles, lifting the sword up awkwardly, while simultaneously tilting his head towards it. If he rams the blade through his eardrum first, he won't hear the monster. And then if he stabs out his eyes, he won't see her either. If he does all those things, would his crew be safe?

"DON'T YOU DARE! USOPP!!"

Usopp doesn't want to listen anymore.

Chapter Text

Gemma was walking the front of her store, arranging little nick nacks into neat rows, or arranging produce to sit just so. She liked for everything to be perfect. It was a quiet day for shopping today, which was alright. The town would be back into full swing soon.

She had expected a lull after Mr. Agate died.

Her hand paused on an onion and she thought about Mr. Agate.

What a nuisance that had been... Her last small competitor and his useless fireworks stand. She had crushed all the other competition, but Mr. Agate and his homemade fireworks had somehow lasted. She supposed him being a local had given him quite the reputation. Everyone on the island seemed to have a small soft sport for the quiet and often stern man. He wasn't super unfriendly and often went out of his way to help others, but his expression seemed permanently dour.

She could never get him to change his slightly grim face. No matter how friendly, or unfriendly she was to him.

He just had the same sour face, the same greasy hair, and the same polite reasons he would give in refusal to sell his store.

"You offer me enough to retire, but I'm not there yet. I've got friends who come to see me, and I like being busy. I like the thought of leaving the stand to my sons, a little side venture that my boys can do as they chase their own dreams."

...or some bullshit like that.

He was surprisingly sentimental...

...and forthright.

She hated people like him, people that couldn't be bought.

There were ways to rectify that.

At the end of his... "mysterious illness," he had caught on to her. Caught on to what she had done to the potassium phosphate and organic dyes she had sold him. But he hadn't outed her, although he was probably too far gone to be coherent when he showed up at her door babbling and causing a scene. Still, he had ranted and raved and not on his behalf, but for someone else. He kept mentioning a pirate he had sold his product to. And other local villagers.

Her intended victim really was only Mr. Agate, but if others got sick and it led to him and ruined his good name, his business' reputation, well that was just a nice cherry on top for her.

Moving on from her produce section, she went to a section she now had newly placed on the left side of her store. A fireworks, and chemical section she kept under lock and key, for safety reasons of course. She thought of the last person she had directed towards Mr. Agate. He had been a young boy with a long nose. When she heard what he needed, she hesitated. If he was just buying smoke bombs, he should be okay... but if he was making them himself... well...

She shook her head and blinked the thought away. The young man would probably die out at sea thanks to the faulty items he had bought, and that wasn't her problem. Pirates died all the time, what did it matter if she was the one to be the root cause? He probably deserved to die anyways. Stupid pirate. Stupid life he chose. He should have gone for something less dangerous.

Like running a store.

"Still... I suppose I feel a little bad thinking of him out at sea, hallucinating and choking. Unsure of what messed him up..." Gemma sighed to herself.

She couldn't remember anything about his face but his ridiculously long nose. She remembered the smile he had given her when she told him of Mr. Agate's stand. It had done nothing to her conscious, his life was not her responsibility. If he didn't stick out in her mind, then he wasn't someone worth sparing. She wouldn't feel guilty. It didn't matter. And there was a chance he could pull through after all. Provided he stopped making smoke bombs in enough time. If he stopped when the first few symptoms set in, he should be fine. But if he kept going... well.

Well, it was his problem.

Tracing her hand over one of her shelves she lingered for a moment, sighing with pleasure at all her hard-earned work coming to fruition. She had a monopoly on this island now. No one stood above her or even below. She was the only one to buy from save for a few little markets and restaurants. But they weren't a real threat. And if that ever changed, well the island would suddenly find an epidemic on its hands. Something that would get blamed on bad food handling.

Gemma smiled.

A bell rang, signaling a customer's arrival, and Gemma smiled wider. Turning with a flourish she spread her arms and began a greeting, "Dear customer, welcome to Gemma's Groceries! Please come inside! How can I be of-"

Her voice died off as she took in the sight of the figures that stood in her doorway, shouldering their way in with slow and purposeful steps. There was a large Fish-man with a black gaze fixed on her, and a tall swordsman with three swords at his hip. In the center of the massive pair was a scrawny young man with a terrible scar on his chest and a straw hat. Behind him was a lovely redheaded girl, with tear track stains on her cheeks, and a grim expression. She shut the door and turned the lock behind her.

"Gemma," the boy in the straw hat said, and there was something about his tone. Something about how he said her name, the weight behind it... he would be her undoing.

"Dear customers.. wh-what can I do for you?" Gemma asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Ronin Agate," The Fish-Man said, voice low and rolling, like waves breaking on stone.

"Usopp," The swordsman said, a foreign name that he clearly held in some esteem based on how his eyes flashed as he spoke it.

"You took away that old man's life for a pointless personal gain, and my Nakama is laid up suffering because of your actions," The straw-hatted man spoke next, voice clear but aching. Full of pain over atrocities he did not commit but had been unable to stop. "You're going to save Usopp, you're going to tell us how to save Usopp, or..."

The redheaded woman produced a wooden torch, and with a lighter, lit it. The flame took immediately, and she held it aloft, lighting up the back of the straw-hatted man's head like a halo on fire.

"Or we'll burn this place to the ground, and every other store you own."

Gemma screamed then, and she tried to move. Tried to run.

But three swords found themselves at critical points on her body, keeping her pinned against the shelf she had been standing at. Shaking her head back and forth, her lovely face twisting into an ugly snarly, she screeched, "You can't do this!"

The straw-hatted man walked forward, his face determined and calm, "Yes we can. We're pirates. Now... tell us what you did to Mr. Agate and Usopp!"

Ten Minutes Earlier

"Franky, please! Tell us!"

Franky held up a hand, gently and without words quieting the others. His glasses had been covering his eyes, and very carefully he took them off so he could look at his friends. His eyes were red, and some tears clung to his lower lids. He was completely serious as he began to explain.

"Usopp-bro was poisoned... is poisoned," Franky curled a hand into his fist. "Lead poisoning."

"Lead poisoning?" Robin echoed, squinting in confusion and even disbelief at Franky's words. "It doesn't work like that! Not in days!"

Franky shook his head, signaling for the others to remain quiet, "It's a form of it... yes. The potassium chlorate Usopp was using is laced heavily with lead, as well as the organic dyes. Normally it would take a lot more lead to be this effective this quickly, but... but Chopper says the real problem is a created toxin coating the lead granuals. Someone soaked this stuff with a familiarly made chemical."

"He's seen it before?" Sanji asked, heart hammering as he finally had a name for Usopp's illness. The thing that had turned their lives upside down in the past several days.

Franky's jaw rippled, and he swallowed before he spoke again, "Chopper recognized the chemical makeup, the order it was crafted in. Like a fingerprint... Caesar Clown. Whatever poisoned Usopp was something created by that cretin!"

"I regret letting him go every damn day!" Sanji spat, the others seeming to nod in agreement.

"A recent creation?" Robin asked, her fists curled tight, her nails biting into her palms.

"Chopper doesn't think so... He thinks it's an earlier creation based on how easy he's going to be able to cure it," Franky said, but there was no joy in his voice.

"If he can cure it, why do you..." Sanji couldn't finish his question. He was too scared to ask.

"He can stop the illness, and cure the poisoning... but treatment for lead poisoning this severe can take up to six weeks. The damage had already been done! The damage that's been done can be permanent. Hallucinations, neurological fits, seizures, organ failures... Usopp could live with side effects for the rest of his life... if he makes it through the treatment," Franky admitted, tears unabashedly falling down his cheeks. The cyborg shook his head, "Even with knowing what to do... even with having a way to save his life, Usopp might-"

"That's a lot of maybes and what-ifs for someone like our Usopp," Brook's quiet voice broke over Franky's anguished wailing.

The small gathering turned their attention to Brook, who was finishing the last twist off of Usopp's hair. He looked serene, somehow, and you could feel a smile on his face. He removed a silken scarf from his throat, gathered the carefully made twists and tied Usopp's hair in one final grouping, and ran a gentle hand over Usopp's sweaty brow. "This is Usopp... and he is a legend. Just like any of us are legends. God Usopp. Chopper has the cure, and Usopp will get better. Usopp is very brave, our Usopp. And for anything else that he has to overcome, we will be there."

Franky sniffled loudly, "Ah, Skele-bro! You're so damn awesome!"

Brook chuckled, "Yohohohoho! I know... don't focus on the bad my friends! Focus on the good. We're going to-"

Usopp's body jerked in a violent arching motion, a gugled scream slipping past slack lips.

"Usopp!" Robin cried, rushing to kneel back next to him.

Usopp, his eyes open, but rolled in the back of his head, struggled out of the blaknet that had been wrapped around him, and one hand curled around Brook's sword. He jerked, and the blade came loose, the hilt bashing into Brook's face hard, stunning the skeleton with a violent crack. Amidst cries of his name, Usopp continued to thrash, and his fist, still curled around the blade flew wide and struck Robin in the face, her lips splitting as she was knocked back.

"Stop it, you crazy bastard!" Sanji roared, one arm steadying Brook, while the other reached for Robin. His voice was less angered, and more of a plea. A plea at the invisible thing that was haunting and torturing Usopp, even as they finally had the root cause to his suffering.

"Is it a seizure? Hallucination?" Franky growled, dropping on a knee to get Robin back on her feet.

Usopp was on his own feet, his head dropped back and staring up sightlessly at the sky. He was moaning, and his body spasmed as his hand gripped into the blade, the steel biting through his skin. In a short few seconds, he had maneged to get on the railing of Sunny.

"USOPP!" his friends screamed as one, and that got the fevered sniper stopping.

His head rolled back around, dropping into his chest, and when he lifted it, his feverish eyes were open. And they could see. He stared at them, his gaze dropping to his injured hand, and then glancing out over his friends. His bleary eyes lingered on Brook and Robin, and then a visible shudder rolled up and down his body.

"No," Usopp wheezed. His head shook back and forth, "No!"

"He's sick, he's sick, he doesn't know what he did! He didn't mean to," Robin moaned her face filling with horror as she watched Usopp's fumbling steps.

"Usopp stop!" Sanji barked, trying to support Brook, but also get to his feet.

"Usopp Bro, calm down! Whatever you're thinking---stop! Usopp-whatever you're thinkin' is wrong! Don't move! Don't!" Franky's voice was raw and harsh, his shouted words only seeming to upset Usopp more.

Usopp's expression is deranged. Full of misery, longing, and other human emotions that had become jumbled into one agonizing mess. Both his hands grip Brook's blade, his skin breaking easily. Rivers of red drip down his skin, down the silver of the blade, and Usopp is babbling.

"It has to stop! My ears. My eyes. If I can't see... if I can't hear..." Usopp smiles, sad and miserable, feral and savage. His is not a face they normally would recognize.

In a sluggish motion he angled the blade towards his ear, and tilted his head, as if preparing to rocket himself on the blade, ear first.

"DON'T YOU DARE! USOPP!!" The bellow is an unexpected voice.

As it shatters the air, a syringe sinks itself into Usopp's neck, the liquid sinking into one of Usopp's veins. From the open door stood Chopper. He was wielding a slingshot, that Usopp had gifted him, and with an unsteady but determined hand, had fired a syringed directly into Usopp's neck. The reindeer sniffled, tears matting the fur of his cheeks, "Don't you... dare!"

Franky rushed forward, an arm hooking around Usopp like a steel band, and with determined fingers, he pried Brook's blade away and tossed it aside.

Chopper rushed forward, ordering, "Lay him out on the deck. I need to give him another dosage. And then see to his hands. We'll need to strap him to bed. And I will have to begin EDTA chelation therapy, and start him on fluids."

"Will he...?" Franky's voice was hollow and uncertain. A small frightened voice from a large man.

Chopper, small and soft, looked up with Franky, wearing an expression that could move mountains, "He's going to be alright. This will save him. As for the aftermath... I'll make sure he recovers fully. Usopp will be the same as always, as good as new when he wakes up. I'm gonna save him!"

Luffy watched Gemma squirm as his Nakama wrecked her store. Knocked over items, and ruined products. It was a waste, but who knew how much of the things she was selling had actually been stolen from legit hard-working people.

Nami had broken into Gemma's back office, and less than half an hour later came out with stacks of papers that showed off her wrong-doings. Nami had even produced a diary, and found pages describing Gemma's frustration with Ronin Agate's small little stand that he refused to sell to her. She was annoyed that people showed loyalty to someone she described as crotchety and greasy. Gemma had a good mask of being a polite eager businesswoman, but Mr. Agate wasn't buying her mask or her charm.

It enraged Gemma that he could see right through her.

"...And then one night I met a curious man. He saw me across the bar, and recognized the look in my eyes. He said I must have been dealing with incompetence, and that he also hated incompetence. He said his name was Caesar Clown," Nami stopped reading and looked at Luffy.

Luffy was still glaring at Gemma, his nostrils flaring as the woman shrunk from his accusing gaze.

Zoro kicked open the glass of the firework's case, and Jimbe began to trail its contents on the floor.

Nami went back to reading, "He was a clever man, with a fascination for chemicals. He explained to me a chemical weapon he had bioengineered and tested out on some Marines back in his younger days. He knew the recipe, and was willing to hand it over for a large amount of coin. I got a discount by inviting him back to my room-EW!" Nami interrupted herself, and shot Gemma a disgusted look. She skimmed the rest of the page, and turned over to the next, and then the next.

Three pages later she resumed her reading, "...I had a marvelous night. I've got plans to bribe the cargo ships to cheat Mr. Agate, and then I will sell him some compromised products. Since he brews everything himself in his little shack of a lab, it should be easy to poison him. Others might get some fallout, but I'll make sure it looks like Mr. Agate was too careless. He'll die, and his name will be ruined with him. It's so easy now."

"Despicable," Jinbe spat, his whole body trembling with the outrage over it all.

"It's so petty," Nami agreed, her eyes shining with unshed tears, "Ruining so much life to have a monopoly of a store."

"All that evidence... we will give it Jasper. Let him and his family decide how to punish Gemma," Luffy said cooly, picking up the lit torch that had been propped up for now.

Luffy walked towards the turned over fireworks, and Gemma screamed, "Don't! It'll catch the whole store!"

"Exactly," Luffy agreed not sparing her a look. He jerked his head in her direction, and Zoro hauled the woman up, wrenching her arms behind her back. Jinbe took the rope off of one of Gemma's shelves and began to tie her up.

"Nami, is Ceasar's recipe written down in that journal?" Luffy asked, not turning to look away from where he stood over the fireworks.

"Yes, Captain," Nami responded immediately.

"Keep it. We will take it to Chopper. Chopper will save Usopp... if he hasn't already figured out a way to do it. Was there money in her office?"

"Yes," Nami answered this time a little slower, not sure what Luffy was wanting.

"Empty the registers, and her office. Put all of it over here. We'll light it up too."

"My money!" Gemma shrieked, eyes wide at the horrible thought of all her Beli going up in flames.

Luffy turned to her, his face terrible and calm. His expression quickly changed into a glare and he leaned forward, "Your money earned with innocent people's blood, with my Nakama's blood... it goes up with your shop."

"You good with that Nami?" Zoro asked in a grim joke.

Nami dumped the first bag of Beli on the floor herself, "I don't need her money! I'd never be able to look at Usopp in the face again."

When the money was dumped in a pile on top of the fireworks and other strewn over products, the crew stood back, their Captain standing over it, burning torch in hand. The flame was low now, it had been burning so long, but it would be enough.

"Don't! Don't!" Gemma screamed, thrashing in her bindings. Jinbe held her by her head, one massive head draped over her crown, while his thick fingers dug into her forehead and temple, forcing her to look forward at the pile, "My money! Don't! We can make a deal!"

Luffy glanced at her, his expression cold, "Yeah? Hmm... then give me back Usopp's health. Give me back the days you stole from him."

Gemma's mouth wobbled, and she stared back at him in silence, having nothing to say.

He dropped the torch and the paper money went up, and the fireworks hissed and popped.

"We better go," Zoro hummed, and then after a moment, "Is this enough? Just burning down her store? We could have her head, here and now."

"It's not enough," Luffy agreed, voice hollow and face lit up from the flames of burning ill-gotten gains, "The money, her store, none if it is enough. Killing her wouldn't be enough either... but Jasper needs vengeance for his father too. We've got a cure for Usopp... we will let Jasper finish settling the score. It's the right thing to do."

Gemma screamed, and thrust herself forward, breaking from Jinbe's surprised hold. "My money! My store! My Money!"

"You crazy-" Jinbe's words cut off in a sharp gasp as Gemma, her hands bound behind her back flung herself on a pile of burning Beli. Her hair caught fire quick, and she screamed, rolling away from her poor chase, the flames following after her and sticking to her upper body greedily trying to burn her out.

Luffy grabbed her by her calf, and hauled her away from the fire but didn't bother to put her out. He let her thrash, until she'd managed it on her own, most of her hair smoking and ruined, with great patches of smoking burns streaking over her face. She let out another shakey wheeze, "My money..."

Luffy shook his head and silently began to drag the woman behind him as fireworks began to go off around the store, exploding in sparks of color that caught the products of the store in flames. All the things she had worked for, all the sins she committed went up in flames. Burning away much quicker than it had taken to obtain them.

The four exited the store, Jasper standing outside, his mouth hanging open as the store began to emit a strange orange glow as the flames began to eat it from the inside out.

Nami pressed the stack of papers into Jasper's hands and a journal. She waited until Jasper had stopped gaping after Luffy before she explained, "Evidence of what Gemma did. Proof. Make sure it gets to the right sources."

"Miss... Miss Nami?"

Nami kicked Gemma in her gut, and Jaspe jumped just seeming to be made aware of the woman left tied and smoking near his feet.

"You're going to have a lot to clean up. We're leaving the rest to you," Nami told him, before jogging to chase after her Captain and her friends.

"Where are you all going?" Jasper asked, bewildered by everything that had just happened. These people had stormed into his life, accused his father, heard his story, and then in an hour or two let fire to Gemma's store and produced, presumably a stack of evidence against her. He didn't get it.

"Back to our ship to check on Usopp," Luffy called out, without turning back, "It was always about him after all. You take care of the trash, and if you need us we will be at the docks. Come get us if you need us, we'll try to help out... I plan to pay respect to your dad's grave later. I owe him."

Tears fell freely down Jasper's face, and he clutched the papers and notebook to his chest. He thought of screaming a thank you after them, or pledging his life and his children's lives to the straw hats. But at a loss for words, he opted for a deep bow at his waist, his head bowed low with the weight of gratitude for the pirates who stormed united into his life, and cleaned up a very big and painful mess.

He only hoped they hadn't cut their hands on the sharp edges of a greedy woman's poor decisions.

Chapter Text

With his eyes closed, Usopp could see everything.

Everything as it was, as it is, as it ever would be.

Usopp, saw it all.

And it was all so fleeting.

He closed his eyes and bid farewell to himself.

"He's not breathing..." Chopper muttered, voice tight and panicked, an ear pressed to Usopp's chest. His pupils pinpricked into dots, and he exploded into his Brain Point form. His large hands titled Usopp's head, and then fumbled gently down his throat to make sure his airway was clear. After those hasty checks were made, Chopper began to do chest compressions, pushing down on Usopp's chest with vigorous pumps. He paused after fifteen compressions to press his lips to Usopp's and flood his mouth with air.

"What's happening?!" Franky demanded, Robin now uplifted in his arms. Her mouth was open, and her hands clung to Franky as she stared out at the scene in disbelieving horror.

"He was just... he had been..." Robin wheezed.

Chopper didn't answer. With a wild, feral look, he only continued to give emergency CPR to Usopp.

"Oh God, oh no. Oh no, no, no!" Sanji hissed hands burying in his hair.

"This can't be happening..." Brook wheezed, his own hands pushing into his fro and pulling.

Robin pushed gently away from Franky and stormed into Chopper's office with a crash. Chopper gave Usopp another breath, and then she came rushing back with a variety of items. A heavily ladened bag, an arm full of linen and towels, and an empty basin. Not waiting to ask for permission she rushed to Chopper's side, ready to be his nurse if he needed.

"Robin, take over!" Chopper barked, and on his count, Robin straddled Usopp's waist, and she took over his chest compressions.

Chopper dove for his bag, and began to dig through it, "I have to start emergency triage. Robin, you'll probably feel Usopp's ribs break. Don't stop!"

Robin nodded, blood and sweat dripping down her face, head bouncing up and down with affirmation.

"C-Chopper..." Franky began to half sob, and he made to take a step forward.

"No one come over here! I'm going to cut Usopp open and manually pump his heart! If you can't be of help, don't come over here!" Chopper barked, fur bristling as he began to put long gloves on, and pull out a series of surgical tools. He fumbled for alcohol, tubes, and all sorts of things that had Franky gasping, and clutching at his chest.

"U-Usopp-bro!"

Sanji closed his eyes, hands pressed into his hair and covering his ears. His jaw was clenched hard and he was turning ghost white, "No...no! No!"

Franky, seeking solace, curled his arms around Sanji and hauled the cook into his embrace. He did not dare take a step closer to the scene not wanting to get in the way of those that were trying to save Usopp's life. Buoying himself, and Sanji, he clung to the chef who had his eyes closed, tight, tight, tight! He did not want to see.

Brook released his hair, and straightening his spine, he dashed forward assisting Chopper by taking an ambu-bag, a clear medical grade silicone bag that could be placed over Usopp's face and squeezed so that air could be filtered into his mouth and nose while others performed the heart compressions. Brook positioned the ambu-bag over Usopp's face, Robin sprouting another arm to steady and correct Brook's hold of the bag.

"You'll squeeze on my count!" Chopper barked, and Brook bobbed his head obediently.

"Yes Doctor!"

Once Chopper had Brook going, he looked to Robin, "Get ready to move away when I tell you. I'm going to cut, and then push my hand in. Hold him steady in case... in case he starts to jerk around."

Robin nodded, her expression grim, but determined. Her eyes were unblinking, and the blue reflected Usopp's skin like he was a flame. She did not, would not, could not look away.

"One... two... three!"

On the count of Chopper's three, Chopper slit Usopp open and began to spread muscle and tissue.

"Someone get me the bags of Blood type S!" Chopper ordered, and after a second when he heard no movement, he shouted, "NOW!"

Franky finally released Sanji and turned to do as Chopper requested. Sanji was still frozen, hands pulling at his hair, but his eyes were wide open. His color hadn't improved and now tears were dripping down his face as he bit on his lower lip. A shaking, whining wheeze escaped out of his chest and choked in his throat. He was petrified.

Chopper, in the meantime, had produced what looked like bolt cutters and snapped into something in Usopp that made a horrendous crack. Robin made a noise in her throat, but did not move or stop her assistance. Brook likewise continued to squeeze the ambu-bag at the count Chopper had instructed him to follow. 

"Keep the beat Brook, keep the beat! You're a musician for heaven's sake," he told himself as if his words made any sense.

Chopper shifted a bit more tissue from Usopp, and then Chopper pushed his hand inside of the sniper, all the way up to his elbow.

Chopper pressed, massaging Usopp's heart to beat.

"I-I got it!" He bleated, relief tinging his terse tone.

Franky returned with bags of blood, and Chopper panted out instructions to get the bags ready to hook up to Usopp.

"My... my hands... they're too big!" Franky wheezed, shaking as he held a thin tube and a bag of S-type blood.

"I'll do it," Sanji croaked, suddenly at Franky's side and taking over the fiddly task. He did not look at Usopp or at anyone else, but with practiced and skilled hands, began to tread the tubing into the i.v. bag. His hands, that of a chef, that of a man who was used to wielding a knife with gentle care, and fragile ingredients like diamonds, were steady.

At that moment, Luffy and the others returned to the ship.

"Oh my God!" Nami cried, her voice ripping from her throat, shredding the already tense atmosphere into pieces.

"Usopp! What are you doing to him?!" Luffy cried hands reaching out. They were shaking, and the tremor was spreading down his body. His eyes were wide, and the skin of his face seemed to stretch and pull as his emotions warred within him. Was he afraid? Did he trust Chopper to save Usopp? Had it all been too late? Was this a final moment?

Zoro and Jinbe, as one, swept both navigator and Captain into their arms, stopping any further movement.

"No, no, we can't interfere!" Jinbe cautioned, swallowing hard as he held Nami against his chest, his hand also buried into Luffy's sleeve.

"Captain, let Chopper work," Zoro whispered, voice hoarse and cracked, his arms full of the rubber man. Zoro's arms were probably the only arms strong enough to hold Luffy back.

"Save him! SAVE HIM! You have to save him!" Luffy sobbed, voice cracking like he was a child.

Chopper kept up the pumping, clipping out steady instructions as he worked.

Usopp, looked down at his husk, and at his crew that was trying to save it. His chest filled with pride as he looked at them all. He loved them so much. He wanted to stay. But if love was strong enough to tether people together, he supposed he would have never lost his Mother that terrible day in his childhood. He supposed he might have even seen his father as well.

Turning from his crew, he took one last look at Sunny, feeling a warmth bloom in his chest. The Thousand Sunny was not The Going Merry, but the ship hadn't needed to be for Usopp to love it. The same and different all at once.

"I love you Sunny," Usopp whispered looking out over the ship. He watched the breeze stir the rigging and the bound sails. The jolly Roger Usopp had painted so long ago, waved forlornly at him as if knowing what was to come. A gust even picked up the swing on deck and sent it flying high for a moment, before it drifted slowly back down over the lawn deck. In its seat was what Usopp thought was a child in a red raincoat.

The specter was looking at Usopp, clutching the swing and leaning forward, its faceless form turned to him as if trying to make eye contact.

Tears dripped down Usopp's face, and he felt a bubble of happiness fill him up.

"I love you Sunny," he said again, bidding Sunny's Klabautermann goodbye, the red coat wearing shade letting out the softest and saddest of sighs.

Yearning.

Usopp looked out at his crew, all in different stages of scramble, trying to save the shell he had left behind. His tears redoubled and he inhaled again. "Straw Hats... I love you. I love you all. Thanks for taking me with you."

And knowing there was nothing left to do, Usopp turned from his friends, turned from the ship, and marched up Sunny's figurehead. Once at the top, he looked at the sun, and the sky one last time, and then jumped into the water.

He rolled onto his back, letting the current carry him. He floated listlessly for a time, but eventually gentle hands began to pull him down.

Down.

Down, down, down, he was pulled, and Usopp had the grim humor to laugh at the situation, "This better not be me descending to hell, I couldn't have been that bad..."

Nothing answered him.

A shark swam by, and Usopp looked at his hulking form and his many rows of teeth. He reached his hand out, and ran his fingers over his grizzly smile, knowing nothing could hurt him now. One of the shark's large eyes shifted to him, and he dipped his nose in acknowledgment, brushed and turned, his gills sliding under Usopp's fingers, and then he swam away.

The gentle hands pulled and pulled, and then he was sinking into a soft cushion cradled in a wooden structure that looked familiar to Usopp. He sank into the otherworldly soft cushion, and he tried to look around, but he was too weary to sit up fully. A soft hand touched his forehead, right above his head, and he rolled his eyes upward.

Another child-like spirit, in a yellow raincoat, was looking down at him, their smile warm and familiar.

"Merry... Merry, it's you!" Usopp breathed his tears starting back up.

Usopp. Hello, my knight. Hello, my friend. Brave Captain Usopp, hello.

Usopp laughed, his eyes closing for a moment, but when he opened them Merry was gone. But their presence was still all around him.

"Merry... Merry where am I?"

In my ribcage. Near where my heart had been. Where I kept all of you. You're in a piece of my hull.

"I see," Usopp hummed, sinking more comfortably on the cushion, "Is this your heart?"

Yes. It's soft and big. It was made for you.

Usopp looked up at the sea all around him. Everything was blue and dark, a bright halo of lighter blue in front of him, and maybe beyond that was the surface. A school of fish swam by, striped and shaped like spades. They twirled as one and disappeared with Usopp watching their smallest member trail behind them.

"I remember... you said you had wanted to go further. I wish..." Usopp sighed, "Me too. I wish I had gone further too."

Merry hummed sadly, their voice full of sympathy.

"Now what Merry? Is this it? Does it all stop here?" Usopp asked, for once not afraid of whatever outcome was going to happen.

If it were up to me, I would keep you in my ribcage and let you stay forever. I'd cradle you and carry you somewhere new. We'd have an adventure together.

"That sounds nice," Usopp sighed, his body sagging into the softness around him.

...But it's not up to me. I just wanted to see you while... while we waited.

"Usopp," a new voice said, and Usopp snapped his head to his right.

His mother was laying next to him, on her side, and propped up on an elbow. She had tired little lines under her eyes, and her black hair floated in a short wave around her. She was in her favorite sage blouse, and her red and white polka-dotted apron that had her's and Usopp's name embroidered on the pockets. Her black skirt billowed around her, the soft fabric tickling Usopp's calf every so often.

Usopp's mouth was hanging open, because this, was his mother. Not the vision that had twisted and stung him, and looked less and less like his mother every time he saw her. This was the mother he had forgotten about, who had gone dim in his mind's eye. The one he had not been able to draw save for her smile. He had never forgotten her smile.

She smiled, and gently tweaked Usopp's nose, and whispered a twinkling, "Banchina... spell!"

Usopp burst into a laugh and wrapped his arms around her, and she held him tight as they hugged.

"Mother! Mother!"

"The pirates came," Banchina sighed against Usopp's hair, her thin fingers stroking his hair adoring, "They came and you went with them... and look at you. You're a pirate. You're all grown up..."

Usopp cried for a long time, and when he couldn't cry, he laughed. She held him through it all, her cheek against the top of his forehead, and her hand running down his long hair. Fish swam by, and the light around them shifted and changed as time passed. A seahorse hooked around the end of Usopp's nose, and he and his mother both laughed. It then launched itself against Banchina and hooked against her nose. They were silent, and then their laughter redoubled until the creature fled in fright. They squeezed each other, laughing with their heads thrown back, and then cried again.

Time continued to pass.

Usopp didn't know how much... but he was content to just hug his mother, with Merry humming quietly every so often in the background.

But time was passing, and Usopp had to know.

"Mama," Usopp said at last, after weeks had passed, "Mama, am I dead?"

She smiled and shook her head, "No... No, I don't think so. You could be...and maybe even should be... but that's not going to happen."

Usopp looked at his mother's face, and she peppered Usopp's face with little soft kisses, like she used to do when he was five and had come in from playing outside.

"Mama?"

"I'm holding you here in Merry's breast. Keeping you safe until you can go back," Banchina said with a soft little sigh. She looked Usopp in the eye and turned stern, "You probably would be dead now if I weren't here. If Merry wasn't here. We're keeping you tethered."

Usopp looked up at his mother, eyes owlish and round, full of wonder and inspiration. Like he might start telling a story on his next breath.

Instead, he whispered, "How?"

"Sometimes... love is enough," Banchina answered, and gently tapped the tip of Usopp's nose.

He stared at her, and she smiled back, giggling at his stupified expression.

Merry who had been silent a long time giggled too.

There's a lot that's hard to explain out there.

"Sometimes... it's best to just not question it," Banchina tipped forward and pressed a kiss to Usopp's brow. "I love you very much. And so does your crew... Just say thank you, darling."

Usopp's eyes misted over, and he curled his fingers in the fabric of his mother's apron, "Mama... thank you."

"Stay strong. Healing is the hard part," Banchina whispered, and she wiped her eyes as tears began to drip and float away from them like white pearls, "You're going to wake up soon."

"I want to stay with you!" Usopp choked, staring at his mother's face so that he would never forget. Never forget again.

"Longing for the dead is fleeting... longing for the living, for life... that's eternal, sweetie. Don't put yourself here if you don't have to," Banchina says very gently. Pearls and bubbles were spilling from her eyes, and the blue, blue ocean was filling up with her white iridescent pearls.

It's time.

Merry's voice is very soft, fading slowly away.

"Mother... I'm not ready to lose you again!" Usopp chokes, "I'm not brave enough!"

Banchina is held in Usopp's hands, he is cupping her precious face as the blue world bubbles and dissolves around him. Pearls float from her eyes, and her smile is bright and white, her eyes full of love, "Silly boy, I'm not lost. I'm always around you." She tilted towards him and pressed a kiss against his forehead. She was fizzing into a storm of bubbles, her form fading away into white, swallowing him up with her.

"Be brave Usopp."

Bye Usopp!

...Two months later, Usopp... opened his eyes.

Chapter Text

The sun was on his face. He was lying propped up on pillows, the smell of sunflowers all around him. He blinked lazily, his long lashes tickling his cheeks. His breathing shifted and he stretched, testing his limits.

It was hard to move.

Usopp's head dropped over to the left, and he spotted Chopper’s hunched back sitting at his desk. He was writing, muttering something to himself, his hooves flying across the paper as he worked. There was a vase of flowers next to Chopper, cut and trimmed yellow and orange sunflowers standing tall and proud in the vase. One on the desk… and one on the floor. Oh, and another on the other side of Chopper’s desk. And another on the floor…

Usopp rolled his head, and the bed next to him was covered in planks, the boards pressing the mattress down, giving a firm surface for the dozens of other vessels filled with sunflowers. Yellow, orange, red, white, opened blooms, closed blooms, big dark faces, and stretching petals. They vessels that held the flowers weren’t all vases either. There were cups, a fish bowl, a saucepan, a boot, and even a small trashcan. The room was perfumed heavilly with the scen of sunflower. It was like Usopp was lying in a field.

Usopp blinked a small puff of mirth escaping past his parched lips.

“U… Usopp…?”

Usopp turned his attention back to Chopper, who was looking at him, his eyes perilously wide, and his expression full of hope, “Usopp?”

Usopp blinked lazily, and his eyes fluttered in greeting.

Chopper was up and sobbing at his side in seconds. Usopp couldn’t understand a word he blubbered. The little reindeer sobbed against Usopp’s cheek, nuzzling and sobbing against Usopp’s face, while his hands checked Usopp’s vitals, and adjusted his blanket.

“The sunflowers… are pretty…” Usopp whispered, his voice weak and parched.

Chopper sobbed and babbled some more, and Usopp could catch a few words this time. A few stray sentences.

“Two months.”

“You’ll be tired.”

“EDTA therapy.”

“Another month of rest.”

“Lead Poisoning.”

“Hang on, don’t go to sleep just yet!”

Usopp drifted back to sleep after that.

The next month would be spent in an out of consciousness. 

He would open his eyes to Chopper the most. Chopper would give him a check-up, and force himself not to fall to pieces as he tried to inform Usopp on his condition. It didn't really work, Chopper was an emotional teary mess every time Usopp saw his face. Chopper would remind Usopp what had happened, helping the Sniper recall snatched pieces of memory that would fade away when he’d drift back off to sleep. It was a relief to see Chopper every time he opened his eyes back up. But eventually, glimpses of the rest of his crew would start appearing in those brief moments of awareness too.

Nami was the first person he saw after Chopper.

She was wetting Usopp’s mouth with a rag, gently whispering to him.

“...I’ll get rid of all your debt, right here, right now, if you’d just wake up one of the times I’ve been in here with you. You’ve seen Chopper a dozen times. It’s my turn!”

“...Promise to clear my debt?” Usopp whispered, eyes fluttering open.

“USOPP!” Nami shrieked, and Usopp winced and flinched away from her scream.

“Oh God, Usopp! I’m so sorry! Usopp! Usopp! Look at me,” Nami whispered her eyes wet with tears, and her voice shaking with emotion.

Usopp did. He smiled at her beauty. She was all waves of orange hair, big tears, and a smile that spread across her face like the sun. Behind her, there was golden light from the sun, and the sweet smell of sunflowers everywhere. She was radiant, the face of the woman, one of his best friends. She, like the rest of his crew, was closer to him than family... in fact, this whole ship was his family. Funny, how he only realized now.

“You’re beautiful,” he said, simply because it was true and he thought it might make her glow more.

Nami blinked, startled by Usopp’s proclamation, and her tears fell faster, “I… I-I… I already waved your d-debt! Don’t make me reinstate it! Fl-Flirting isn’t free!” And then she wailed loud and fell against his shoulder, weeping openly.

He laughed and fell asleep choking on her hair.

Brook was next. He was playing his violin and singing to Usopp. Something silly and uplifting about flying banana slugs and pink hedgehogs. Brook twirled, tossing his head back dramatically, and slid into the splits, twice, before he realized Usopp was watching him.

He cut himself off, and his jaw dropped open, his mandible swinging back and forth like it might detach.

“Brook,” Usopp warned, coughing a little and making a face, “Close your mouth. It’s terrifying.”

“Oh, Usopp!” Brook trilled, voice high and shaking. He fell on his knees at Usopp’s bedside and gathered up the sniper’s hand. He pressed Usopp’s hand to his face and laughed gleefully, “Usopp! You’re awake! You’re awake!”

“Mmm… not f’r long…” Usopp slurred, already feeling the sleep coming.

His exhaustion was like the rolling waves of the ocean. Endless and unyielding, and always setting its own pace.

“That’s alright… that’s alright. Soon you’ll be awake longer, and then we’ll have stories and you’ll hear music… There will be great food and laughter! Oh, Usopp…” Brook sighed and tweaked Usopp’s cheek, “My dear boy, when you’re better, everything will be one big party again.”

Usopp smiled at the skeleton, his eyes shutting as he did so.

“Ah, are you about to drift back to sleep Usopp?” Brook asked.

Usopp was already gone.

When he opened his eyes next Jinbe was towering over him, and it was dark. The moonlight pouring in through the porthole lit up Jinbe in pale bright light, his blue skin shimmering like silver fish scales.

“Oh… Usopp!” Jinbe gasped, his eyes locked with Usopp’s with pleasant alarm, “Hey there… I wake you, my young friend?”

A burst of childlike excitement unexpectedly filled Usopp, and he smiled wide at Jinbe.

“Jinbe… I saw a shark.”

Jinbe blinked at Usopp’s proclamation. Once. Then twice.

Usopp smiled wider as his excitement caught up with his brain, “He reminded me of you.”

A very soft look touched Jinbe’s face, something in his eyes, and in his warm overlarge smile.

“Did he?”

Usopp yawned, “Yes… we were in the ocean. Me and the shark.”

Jinbe sat down next to Usopp’s bed, and placed a large hand on Usopp’s stomach, patting him like he were a child, “Do you think you can try some water? Or sucking on a few ice cubes?”

Usopp blinked lazily and hummed his affirmative.

Jinbe picked up a small cup and slowly helped Usopp get a few sips down. It wasn’t a lot, and Usopp was tired from the effort, but Jinbe seemed pretty pleased that he managed to drink what he had.

Usopp told Jinbe about the shark who greeted him in the ocean, and Jinbe smiled and listened as Usopp talked for a while about being under the ocean, seeing a shark, and a seahorse on his nose.

“My mom was there… and Merry,” Usopp said eventually, though he wasn’t so sure about that. Something good had happened in the ocean, but he couldn’t recall it just yet. Maybe when he could stay awake, maybe when he was fully better. He was getting sleepy again.

“Were they?” Jinbe asked very softly, offing a bit of water to Usopp again. As Usopp spoke, Jinbe had managed to get Usopp to keep sipping on the glass of water. Just a little bit here and there.

“...I think it was real,” Usopp said eventually, taking a last sip of water that Jinbe offered him.

“Yes, you recall it so well. It probably was real,” Jinbe said softly, again gently patting his stomach. “You’ve been through a lot.”

Usopp blinked a bit, his eyelashes fluttering, “Did Chopper massage my heart?”

Jinbe’s face became so stricken, that Usopp immediately regretted the question.

“Oh no,” Usopp softly bemoaned, “Oh no… I’m sorry…” Usopp struggled to lift his own hand, as heavy as one of Zoro’s weights, but when he managed it, he placed it on Jinbe’s and gave it a light squeeze, “I’m sorry Jinbe. Don’t be sad.”

Great big tears rolled unexpectedly down Jinbe’s face, and he put his thumb and forefinger to his eyes with some surprise. He let out a wet little laugh and whispered, “I’m not sad Usopp, not really. I’m…” The word hung there a long time. Long enough for Jinbe to dry his eyes.

Long enough for Usopp to close his own.

“I’m just so happy you’re okay,” Jinbe soothed, and Usopp fell asleep again.

Usopp awoke, to muttering.

“Well, it’ll take some work to get you back on solids Usopp, but we will get you back there, don’t you worry. A lot of broth, but we’ll keep it interesting. Smoothies too… I’ve got plans Usopp… don’t you worry!”

“Sanji?” Usopp guessed before he even opened his eyes.

Silence answered him.

Usopp pried his eyes open, and if he had the energy to jump with surprise, he would have.

Sanji was glaring at him, his mouth a hard line, and his eyes wet.

“You!” Sanji seethed.

“Me?” Usopp rasped.

Sanji made a nasally snortish sound and wiped his eyes with his palms. With his eye mostly dry, the picked up a cup and forced Usopp to drink some water. Usopp took a good size swallow, and Sanji nodded with satisfaction before setting the cup down. He then crossed his arms and leveled Usopp with a glare.

Usopp blinked up at him, confused.

"Sanji?"

“You! You think you can just…” Sanji made a large sweeping motion with his hands, and then set both his fists on his hips, “try to die on us, and then wake up and declare Nami beautiful? Do you realize how smooth that was? She’d been talking about it for days! How dare you!”

Usopp’s eyes twinkled with delight, and he giggled. 

Sanji’s face was flushed, and he was trembling. He looked like he was putting on a very bad act. He wagged a hand at Usopp, his voice pitching in volume and tone as he tried to fight off a sob, and scolded, “Nami-swan is gorgeous but you can’t make a move on her! You hear me Usopp? I forbid it!”

Grinning, and holding back more giggles, Usopp’s eyes shining with mischievous he whispered with intentional softness, “Sanji…”

Sanji settled, suddenly looking mollified, the tip of his nose red from him having to suppress his tears. He tilted forward, and his hand gently clamped on Usopp’s wrist, his thumb stroking over Usopp's pulse.

“You’re beautiful,” Usopp said with all the seriousness he could muster.

Sanji squawked with outrage, and choked, “You little shit! You think you can pull that on me!?”

But then he fell on Usopp, his face in Usopp’s throat, and his arms spread on either side of the sniper, buried into his pillow. He gripped Usopp’s pillow instead of Usopp himself, his hands shaking from the restraint, and wept openly against Usopp’s throat. He was obviously too scared to hug Usopp, too afraid of hurting him. But he wailed loudly regardless.

“You bastard! Y-You can’t cal me be-beautiful and think all i-is forgiven!” Sanji blubbered.

Usopp lifted his heavy arms and wrapped them around Sanji and hugged the chef in the loosest of grips. It seemed to undo Sanji further, and he sagged against Usopp, his weight just barely pressing against Usopp’s body.

“Beautiful Sanji, please forgive me…” Usopp sing-songed, and even to his own ears his voice sounded strong, and like himself.

It was understandable that it broke the chef to even more raucous crying.

When Sanji calmed down, Usopp was already fading back into sleep, but Sanji gripped Usopp’s hands and whispered, “I’ll forgive you, if you promise to wake up soon… and stay awake! And eat all the soup I make! I miss you Usopp! We miss you!”

“Too many…” Usopp whined, wanting to say more. But sleep claimed him before he could finish his complaint about Sanji's demands.

When Usopp woke again, it was evening and his room was painted in orange and reds. Franky was replacing all the sunflowers with new ones, and he was bent very low to accomplish the task. He wiggled as he hummed, and then half sang, “Only the finest for my bro!”

Usopp chuckled, and Franky was fast to whip around, half dead flowers in one hand, and fresh sunflowers in the other. Both went up in the air as he tossed them high up in the air, “You’re awake! And twice in the same day!!”

Franky looked ready to throw himself on top of Usopp, but instead just awkwardly danced in place, large hands hovering over Usopp’s body. Usopp laughed at the sight, tilting his head at the weeping cyborg, “Franky… you doin’ a rain dance over there?”

“You shut up! This is the I’d like to hug ya, but don’t want to hurt ya dance!” Franky snapped, sniffling loudly. Finally, he sank to his knees, and took Usopp’s hands, both disappearing in Franky’s large grip, “Oh Usopp… I’m so glad to see ya awake! You’ve been waking up on and off for a couple of weeks now.”

“A couple of weeks huh?” Usopp whispered blinking lazily.

Franky wiped his face dry and with a serious face explained, “You been out a long time little bro, but… but that’s okay. Who wants to be awake during a long recovery? But CHopper is fixing ya up, and I’ve completely redone your workshop-but don’t worry! Your stuff ain’t gone. I just wanted to get you some updated things. A new table, new ventilation system… things like that. It’s all done. All waiting for ya.”

Usopp smiled, and something shaky came loose inside him.

His vision blurring from tears, he asked, “Franky… I’m gonna be okay right?”

As tenderly as he could Franky took Usopp’s face in his hands, gently shushing him, “Now, now Usopp-bro… you’re fine. You’re going to be just fine. Chopper figured it all out, and you might not remember it, but you’re being treated right now. You’ve gone through a lot, and that’s why you’re sleeping so much, but Chopper says it's good for you. It’s alright bro… shh, shhh now… you’re gonna be okay Usopp. Your Franky has you, and so does your crew. And if you think you can slip through our fingers, well you can't slip through Luffy's!”

Franky wiped Usopp’s tears, and when Usopp’s eyes were cleared, he could see the rivers streaming down Franky’s cheeks, “Better than okay bro, you’re going to live!”

Usopp choked on a laugh, that curled into a bit of a sob, and Franky gently shushed him again.

As Usopp calmed he started to drift off again, Franky gently soothing him the whole way down.

“Just sleep Usopp… it’s okay to sleep. Your Nakama are all here waitin’ for ya, and you’re not going to go anywhere.”

When Usopp awoke again, it was to Robin’s voice.

He couldn’t register the words right away, but he heard a pause, and then a page turn. She was reading a story to him.

“Sir Valentine turned to Amil and asked, “What do you want to do? Do you want to be a hero and have your name known by all, or will you settle for being a good man and have your name known by one?”

Amil had been a hero before. He had joined the knights' order and made and lost his best friend for reasons he still didn’t understand. He’d been cheered for and celebrated, and Petyr was still gone, still lost to the Dragon. Everyone knew his name, but the person he wanted to say it was never going to be able to again. Being a hero wasn’t all that Amil had thought it would be.

But being a good man… that felt like a goal worth seeking.”

“Robin,” Usopp whispered, his eyes slowly opening, “Robin what are you reading?”

Robin, dressed for bed and in her favorite plush purple robe, smiled at Usopp. Gently she shut the book in her hands and turned to the cover. She shook her head, and then whispered, “I don’t know. The title page and cover are both worn down. But it’s a story about a knight who lost his friend and learns how to be good again. It’s very charming… a little sad, but very lovely.”

“Your voice is nice,” Usopp yawned, his eyes closing.

He opened them as he felt a soft kiss touch the tip of his nose. 

Robin, with wet eyes, and a big smile whispered, “Longnose-kun… you’ve woken up three times today. You’ve seen Sanji, Franky, and me… that’s a very good sign for your recovery.”

Usopp smiled, “Good… good.”

Setting the book aside, she poured a glass of water for Usopp and knelt by the sniper, “Do you think you can drink a little? Your voice sounds a little rough.”

Usopp nodded, and hands bloomed gently under him, lifting him to an elevated level so he could sip the water. He managed to get a lot down, and as she pulled away to set the glass down, Usopp spotted a long scar that went straight down through the middle of his chest, about a foot in length.

“Oh… a scar…” Usopp murmured.

Robin said nothing, but Usopp could feel her gaze.

He looked up at her, and she was looking at it, her face a mask for a moment. The one she put on when she needed to hide her emotions. He hadn’t seen that expression since… well, since the events at Water 7.

He blinked, and her expression had changed again, and she smiled very gently at Usopp, “It will fade in time.”

Usopp trailed a finger down the scar, unable to fully feel his own touch. His nerves must have gotten all messed up during healing, or maybe his body simply needed more time. Usopp smiled, “All cool pirates have scars… this isn’t so bad. It makes me look tough… right?”

Robin smiled, her eyes shining with endearment, “Yes, I think you’re right on this one.”

Usopp sighed a bit, and settled into his pillows, “Can you finish reading the story? I’d like to hear some more.”

Robin smiled, and picked up the book, “Until you fall asleep.”

Usopp nodded, “Until I fall asleep.”

He managed to stay awake for a whole chapter.

When Usopp awoke again, he got to see an extremely rare sight of Zoro wielding a flower like a sword.

Zoro twirled a long sunflower in one hand, his fingers guiding the thick stem around his hand in an elegant practiced swirl. He was a little sweaty, and there was a white patch above his brow, fresh like he had received treatment of his own. Stitched for a minor would maybe. His face was glowing with orange light from the afternoon sun, and his eyes weren't looking at Usopp but ahead, at something Usopp wasn't seeing.

Belatedly, Usopp realized Zoro was talking, uncharacteristically so.

“...You would have been impressed to see it. Chopper and I took out those Marines with me on his back. Luffy couldn’t stop shouting about it, going on about samurai warriors and such. He called Chopper a noble steed, which Chopper hated and loved. He did his little dance and everything… you should have seen it. You like epics like this. You would have insisted on telling it at dinner, even if I had been the one to live through the experience. Your retelling would have been better.”

And then Zoro, very gently, adding to the uncharacteristic moment, brushed the sunflower’s face against Usopp’s cheek.

That was when Zoro froze, staring at Usopp who stared back at him, the swordsman’s unscarred eye open wide in shock.

“You’re awake…” Zoro finally said.

“...I have never heard you talk so much in my life,” Usopp answered back, a slow grin spreading to his face.

Zoro’s ears turned red.

Gently, Usopp reached up and curled his fingers around the stem of the sunflower still lightly ticking his cheek, “Were you telling me, a story Zoro?”

Zoro snapped his hands behind his back, taking the sunflower with him, the petals of the large bloom just peeking over his shoulder. His expression smoothing over to his normal usual grim and stoic persona. His ears were still bright red. Zoro cleared his throat and grunted, “I just… thought I’d keep you updated on the goings of around here. While you… slept. You worry about Sunny and us a lot. I thought, maybe you could hear… and would appreciate an…update.”

This admission must have been too much for Zoro, for his hand came to his face, and he cursed a low, “Fuck,” as his face joined his red ears in coloring.

Usopp grinned. The thought of Zoro coming into his room to tell him how the day had gone, all while he slept and recovered was awfully endearing.

“Thanks, Zoro,” Usopp said, and he meant it. It was an extremely kind gesture from their quiet, often too serious, and stoic swordsman.

Zoro sighed and dropped his hand from his face, and then gently dropped the large sunflower lightly against Usopp’s chest, Usopp latching on to it immediately.

“Don’t tell the cook…” Zoro sighed, his voice pleading and threatening all in one.

Usopp smiled, and then looked around his sunflower filled room, “I won’t tell… but are all these sunflowers your idea too?”

Zoro smiled and sank into a chair next to Usopp, “No, that was Luffy’s. Sick people get flowers and cards, so he says. He specifically wanted to give you a sunflower, because you can eat the seeds after.”

Usopp laughed, the end of it twisting into a cough. Zoro leaned down and fluffed Usopp’s pillows to help ease some of the burden. 

“I see…” Usopp said when his coughing fit was over. Usopp’s eyes misted over, and a small unexpected voice broke out of him, “I miss Luffy.”

Zoro immediately stood up, “I’ll get him, right now-”

With one hand still holding the sunflower, Usopp reached out with his other, and caught hold of Zoro’s index finger, halting the powerhouse of a man in his tracks.

“No… don’t go Zoro. I’m not going to last long… and I missed you too,” Usopp sighed, his breath coming out in one long weary gush.

Zoro stared at Usopp for a minute, and then retook his seat, scooting closer to Usopp’s bedside. He adjusts his hand so that he was holding Usopp’s hand, the sniper’s fingers still curled around Zoro’s index finger with a strong grip.

“I missed you too. It’s been very quiet without you,” Zoro said sincerely, “Everyone has been subdued since you’ve been asleep.”

Usopp nodded, his eyes fluttering rapidly as sleep tried to take him again, “Are we still docked on the island?"

“We’re on the other side of it now. It’s more secluded, there’s no nearby villages. It’s a good place as any to take a break so you can get some rest,” Zoro answered his other hand coming to rest on Usopp’s knee and pat it rhythmically.

The tap tap tap on Usopp’s knee was aiding in Usopp being lulled back to sleep.

“Oh… Zoro… did I miss a lot of watches?”

Zoro smiled, and chuckled, “Oh, yes, you did. You’ll make them all up. Chopper’s going to have me be put in charge of your physical therapy when you’re up!”

Usopp shuddered, closing his eyes, “If I tell you how I made Sanji cry like a lovesick girl will you go easy on me?”

He didn’t see Zoro’s face, but he heard the laughter, and Zoro squeezed Usopp’s knee, his strong grip warm and controlled. That massive hand could do so much harm, but it would never hurt Uopp. No one on Usopp’s crew would. He was a lamb safe with all these monsters and it was how he liked it.

“Usopp, I want to hear every last detail. Don’t leave out a single thing.”

“Next time,” Usopp promised, face tilting against the scent of the sunflower tickling his cheek, “Next time.”

When Usopp awoke this time, he was moving. He was wrapped up on several layers of blankets, and a big fluffy comforter, and was being carried outside, the stars shining above his head like glitter in inky paint. And shining just as bright as all those stars was the face of the man who would be Pirate King, Luffy.

“Luffy!”

At his name, Luffy looked down, wide eager eyes fixing themselves on Usopp’s face. Luffy’s whole expression came alive, and his eyes twinkled with pure unfiltered joy as they looked at Usopp. Luffy shifted Usopp just a little in his arms, and stretched a hand to his own mouth, placing a finger against his lips for silence.

“We’re sneaking out tonight, Usopp! Shh!”

Usopp grinned wide, craning his head to see where they were.

They were still on Sunny, and Lupin was carrying Usopp to the grass deck where pillows and more blankets already awaited them.

“Chopper is going to get real mad, isn’t he?” Usopp asked voice soft.

Luffy sobered a little, “Not too mad I hope… but you finished your therapy… no more medicine for you! The first leg of recovery is over!”

“My what?” Usopp asked back trying to pick through the memories of the few times when he was awake.

“EDTA or ABCD or KFC… it’s a buncha letters! It was IVs full of this stuff to help you get better! It just took a long time…” Luffy sighed, and then with a very solemn expression Luffy said, “Usopp… you were really sick.”

Luffy stopped at the pile of pillows and gently set Usopp down, tucking the cocooned sniper in the pillows and soft materials with the utmost care. He then sat next to Usopp, a hand slung around the Sniper’s waist. “I promised you when you were done with it, we would celebrate. You might not have heard the promise, because you were still asleep, but a promise is a promise! You’re still too weak for a party, but a night under the stars should be fine.”

Usopp was quiet for a while, content to just watch his Captain look up out at the stars.

“Luffy… how long have I been in and out?”

Without looking at him Luffy answered, “You were in a coma for two months. And you’ve been in and out of consciousness for another month.”

“Three months!”

“Mmm!” Luffy grunted with affirmation, nodding his head. He finally looked back at Usopp, his face serious, “I knew you'd get better. We just had to wait. Chopper says there’s still a ways to go… but with help, we’ll get you ready. And then we'll be back out there!”

“Luffy… but… the sea. Have we… have we not gone back out there? Have we just been docked? What about One Piece?” Usopp felt his heart racing inside his chest, each beat painful. Had they just been waiting for Usopp to recover? Sitting around doing nothing? No adventures, no treasure hunting, no sailing, no nothing?

Luffy frowned and looked back down at Usopp, “We’ll get there. We’ll get One Piece, I’ll become Pirate King, Nami will make her map, we’ll find all Blue, and do everything else… but not without you. Not risking you. You needed rest. So you’re getting it. The sea can keep calling… I’ll answer it when we’re all ready together.”

Luffy’s smile returned, and with both hands, he reached out and dried the tears streaming down Usopp’s face. “We’re not a crew if we don’t sail together, right Usopp?”

Usopp thought of his father who had left his family for the sea. He thought of his mother who told Yasopp to go, without thinking about herself or about Usopp. Luffy was similar to both of them, Luffy loved the sea. But where he was different from Usopp’s parents, was where it mattered the most. Luffy did not give in to the demands of the sea, he did not let himself be led.

He was the leader and would take his time prioritizing what was really important to him. And for Luffy, it was his friends, his precious Nakama.

Usopp was so grateful to be counted among the many that Luffy held above all else.

“L-Luffy…” Usopp whispered, tears rolling freely down his face, “I want to… to go to sea with you.”

Luffy sniffed, and when Usopp calmed enough to look at his Captain, he saw fat tears streaming down Luffy’s face. “I wouldn’t have left without you,” Luffy said, and then like a child, he crumpled, Usopp’s face in his hands, and his own face pressed into Usopp’s shoulder.

“Usopp! You scared me! Don’t get sick like that ever again!”

Usopp sniffled, and choked on a wet laugh, the sky pinkening as the stars winked away and the sun began to rise.

“Luffy… I’ve never been sick a day in my life you know! So I, the Brave Captain Usopp, just had to get sick for the first time, in a very dramatic fashion! It makes for a great story, don’t you think?”

Luffy’s sobs answered him, and Usopp joined in, until they both somehow were laughing, holding on to each other as the dawn came, and the rest of the crew woke. 

And Usopp, for the first time in a while, did not go back to sleep.

Chapter Text

Recovery is not a short road, not by any means.

Usopp had thought waking up would be enough. He would learn he still had a hard road to climb. He was awake, he could stay awake, he could smile and converse with his friends. He could learn what really happened as he slipped in an out of consciousness, in and out of fever dreams, and he could move past it. They'd set sail, and begin their journey anew.

"Eventually Usopp, eventually," Chopper said smiling patiently at Usopp while holding out a spoon, "Let's get you back on solids, and walking first."

Sanji and Chopper had Usopp on a strict diet. Liquid and bland that had Usopp looking at Sanji with shock. Sanji winced at Usopp's expression, and in a fond and slightly helpless manner, he chuckled, and pat Usopp's back, "We'll work up back to the good stuff... and I will make you you're most favorite meals. But right now we have to do what we can do... and what you can do is eat some white rice and chicken broth."

Sanji had pressed his face into Usopp's ear and cheek and whispered, "Believe me I understand... but this is necessary. I've done this before, and it's hard. But I'll be with you every step of the way." Usopp had sighed, nodded his head against Sanji's words, and ate through his bland meals with a determined grin.

Usopp had been kept in bed another week after he managed a full day of being awake, and when he saw Zoro, he was actually a little relieved. He was looking forward to a workout. But on the first day, with guidance from Chopper, and Robin reading through a medical book she had in her personal collection, Usopp was stretched, his strength in each limb was tested, he was weighed, and he was guided through movements for a half hour, and then put back to bed. And that was it. That was the allowance of his time out of bed. For weeks.

A second week passed by of bland food, and hardly any exorcise, and Usopp lost his patience.

"Is this really all I can do!? Is this really it?" Usopp wheezed, sitting hard on his sick bed after Zoro had only requested Usopp to march in place for five minutes.

"It's what you can do, for now," Zoro said patiently, leaning forward to dab a white towel against Usopp's sweaty brow.

"It... It's slow! It's so slow! I'm useless! This is taking too long!" Usopp snapped, raking a hand through his hair to push back the dozens of little braids Brook had tidied Usopp's hair in.

"Considering you were poisoned by a suped-up version of lead poisoning, you are doing just fine... the only survivor Usopp! We gotta go slow," Chopper said voice sympathetic and earnest, "It doesn't seem like a lot, but you're recovering great. These things take time."

"Usopp, Chopper is calling the shots. You can't push hard for another week. When you're back on more solids. Get some meat in you, and then we'll try something a little harder," Zoro said, voice stern and serious in a way that filled Usopp with a petulant, younger brother-like rage.

"I'm slower than a thousand year old grandpa. Weaker than a worm! And we're just sitting here, waiting for me to be able to be as half as useful as I used to be, when I was slightly above pathetic!" Usopp whined, flopping on the bed.

"Usopp!" Chopper scolded.

"Hey!" Growled Zoro, followed by another snappish, "Hey!" that came from the doorway.

This voice, made Usopp lift his head, and nervously stare into Luffy's angry scowl.

"Who is insulting my sniper?!" Luffy demanded barging into the room.

Usopp sat up, head shrinking into his shoulders a little, "...Me."

"Who says you can talk bad about my Nakama?" Luffy demanded, his arms crossing as his eyes narrowed into a scowl.

Usopp sulked, scuffing the floor with his sock, "It's just me, talking about myself, Luffy!"

"I don't care! No one can insult my crew, not even my crew!" Luffy snapped, and with a strong hand under Usopp's chin, he tilted the sniper's chin up, until they were looking eye to eye. Usopp flinched as he stared into eyes that fiercely loved him.

"Who says you're pathetic? Who says? No one here thinks you're pathetic! You're really strong, and you're really brave! You got sick! So what if you gotta take your time to recover? We'll wait all year if we have to!" Luffy glared at Usopp hard, until Usopp broke eye contact.

When Usopp's head had dipped, his nose pointed at the floor, Luffy stepped forward and clasped the back of Usopp's head, and pressed Usopp into his stomach.

"You're my sniper, and one of my best friends. So what if you need some time? So what if it'll take a while before you're back to your full strength? We'll wait," Luffy bent down, Usopp's head still caught in a strange headlock of a hug, his face mashed against Luffy's stomach. Nuzzling his cheek against the top of Usopp's head, Luffy muttered, "If you still haven't figured out that I value you more than heading out to find One Piece, you gotta pay attention more. The journey is the fun part, and I can't do it without every single one of you."

Usopp sniffled.

Zoro and Chopper stood silently, several other crew members, if not all, just outside the room, listening to their Captain's words.

"Every member of this crew is important. This ship can't set sail without all its members. Just listen to Chopper and get better. We can always play after you're better," Luffy sighed, before reaching up, plucking his hat off his head, and placing it on top of Usopp's head. Usopp kept his head bowed, bearing the weight of his Captain's love, dreams, and expectations with all his strength.

Luffy pat Usopp's back one more time, and then walked out back onto Sunny's Deck. His confused voice of, "Eh? What are you all guys doing standing around for?" echoed around the sick bay.

Gently Chopper laid a hand on  Usopp's back, "One day at a time Usopp, okay?"

Usopp sniffed, wiped his face with his arm, and lifted his head. He smiled wobbly around the room, "Okay. Okay."

And time passed.

But Usopp was recovering, with each passing day, with each medicine swallowed, with each nutritious meal, and with every exhausting physical therapy session with Zoro.

Every small moment was celebrated. The first time Usopp walked to the bathroom without having to lean against the wall, Franky launched fireworks, and the crew cheered. When Usopp was able to eat a full meal of solids, Sanji hugged an arm around Usopp's throat and howled like a dog. When Usopp could stretch the band of his Kabuto and not get winded, Nami created a rainbow and Brook launched into a song. Whether Usopp was willing to or not, for every small victory he made, his friends celebrated.

Usopp was very grateful to have them.

Because there were slips.

Times when food didn't digest right. Where he had to go back to rice and chicken brother. Where fevers showed up seemingly out of nowhere, only to be explained away by Usopp's temporarily weakened immune system. Things that flickered in Usopp's peripheral view that looked too much like Sogeking or Banchina could send him back for days. Usopp got frustrated. He got angry, he got tired. There were days where he did every bit of his physical therapy, and days where he couldn't do the ten more squats Zoro was asking for. And Usopp cried. He raged, and fumed, and swore. Heavy hands would fall on his head and to his back. Heavy in their comfort, and warm in their support.

And it was hard, so hard.

He kept trying.

Another month went by.

He was deemed well enough to leave the ship, Chopper grinning with pride as he encouraged Usopp to leave the ship and walk around.

So he did.

Usopp took a look at the secluded area his friends had been staying. There were fields of long grass, fields of sunflowers, with apparent gaps from when the Straw Hats had plucked the flowers, a few large trees Usopp couldn't get his arms around. There was a sandy beach, the clear sky above, and the blue ocean all around… and not much else.

Usopp stared out at the peaceful, but for lack of a better word, boring little spot, and couldn’t believe his friends has spent three months here.

“I can’t believe you stayed here. It's… it’s quiet! It’s calm! It’s boring!” Usopp sputtered, gesturing around him as he looked at the beautiful, peaceful, dull little setting.

“It’s what a recovering patient needs!” Chopper snorted, lower lip stuck out stubbornly, “It was perfect for you.”

“Being bored is a small price to pay for your life Usopp,” Jinbe said very seriously, a heavy hand gently cuffing his head, and rubbing.

"We've got all the time in the world to wait," Robin chuckled, twinkling eyes shining at him.

"I wouldn't wait on me!" Usopp snorted.

"But you'd wait on us," Jinbe said in a slow and slightly scolding voice, "Did you think we wouldn't give as hard as you? We love you as fiercely as you love us, and we'll wait until you figure that out."

Usopp sniffed, swallowing around another sudden lump. He had nothing else to say.

He recovered.

They stayed in this quiet little spot, and in pieces, Usopp heard his story retold. A story about him getting sick in the eyes of his friends. He filled in parts that were missing, all the parts from his perspective. Memories of his mother, of a song she used to sing, of a father, a call of the sea, and an illness that finally, Usopp might have a name to.

"It sounds like pneumonia..." Chopper said with a sad reluctant sigh, "Maybe walking pneumonia. Your symptoms don't feel as bad, so you can work and walk around, but in reality, it's very serious. You need even more rest because you only feel like you have a cough. It's dangerous."

"I also doubt that your mother's ventilation system was any good in a shed little bro," Franky said, a hand gently wrapped around Usopp's shoulders, the cyborg practically swallowing Usopp's recovering frame. "Between making a toxic substance and running around suck... your mother..." Franky hesitated.

"It sounds like she worked herself too hard," Chopper finished very gently.

And Usopp agreed, "Yeah... Yeah, it does."

They stayed quiet, and Usopp shook his head, "I'm sorry."

"What do you have to be sorry for?" Robin asked gently.

“I lied to you all about feeling okay… but I… I was also lying to myself. But I’m sorry, really sorry,” Usopp answered.

"You don't have to apologize for that," Brook said shaking his head, "People don't need to apologize for their actions, when they're sick."

"Not... all the time," Usopp muttered, looking pointedly at Brook, "But I need to apologize for this."

Luffy, chewing on a bone leftover from dinner, nodded, and then said, "Well okay. Then I accept." He gestured to the crew with his bone, "We accept."

And that seemed to be that.

Usopp wasn't allowed to give any more apologies after that.

The night they reached the climax of his tale, when he started to lose time and memory, was when Usopp began to feel that itch. That he was almost ready to go back to sea.

"A little more left to do," Luffy said, unprompted by nothing other than Usopp's lingering gaze out to the ocean.

Usopp looked at his Captain and Luffy smiled, "Just a little longer."

And Usopp finished recovering.

Almost half a year had been lost in Usopp getting sick, and then needing to recover. If you asked Usopp, he wasn't worth waiting for. But no one asked him.

The day came when they finally agreed to set off, to leave, after one last journey.

Usopp had been told about Ronin Agate, his son Jasper, and Gemma, as well as her terrible plot that Killed Ronin Agate, destroyed a family, and almost ended Usopp’s life. Usopp, wanted to pay his respects to Ronin Agate, to return to Marah, the village of bitterness, before they set out to sea. One last pause before their adventure.

Luffy had nodded, looked to Franky and Nami, and in a serious voice rumbled, “Set the course!”

They circled the island, returning to Marah within a fortnight.

The Straw Hats had fled before they could see the fate of Gemma.

They did not know that the Marines has been called and the misgivings that had been done, had been reported-the Straw Hats were excluded from that retelling. They didn’t know about the two day and three night long festival, held in honor and memorial of Mr. Ronin Agate, who had wanted to protect other lives in sacrifice of his own. Who had lived a life supporting dreams and not following them. They didn’t know that all of Gemma’s stores and properties had been turned over to the Agate family, and now Jasper ran those stores, and renamed Gemma’s Groceries, to Ronin’s Refineries and Goods.

But when the Straw Hats pulled into dock, they did learn one thing.

The Village of Marah, had changed its name.

A new sign, fresh and shining and new, read: “The Village of Agate, a town banded together.”

Franky grinned, “Their name and slogan is a play on words!”

“Better than calling themselves bitterness,” Robin answered smiling up at him. 

“I like it,” Luffy declared, and he looked at Usopp, who was regarding the sign.

“Ready to meet Mr. Agate?” Luffy asked.

Usopp’s eyes misted over, suddenly overcome with gratitude and grief. He nodded, smiling wobbly, “Yeah… yeah, I’m ready.”

In a quiet procession, they made their way through town, Luffy and Usopp in the center of the group that walked like a cluster. Someone had a hand on Usopp at all times, and Chopper’s hoof was on Usopp’s calf as they walked. Usopp kept quiet thinking about everything that had happened and everything they had gone through. What he had been through, what he had put his friends through, and what the Agate family had lost because of one woman’s greed.

“Usopp, we’re here,” Nami quietly whispered, drawing Usopp from his thoughts.

Usopp lifted his head, and watched as Luffy stepped forward to a tall grave marker. Luffy removed his hat, and greeted the grave with a smile. He reached out and placed his palm against the surface, and said something that he laughed at.

“Feeling alright?” Brook asked sympathetically as Usopp looked at the stone, a yard away from him.

“Just… gathering my thoughts,” Usopp murmured and traced the scar that ran down the center of his own chest.

The Straw Hats remained quiet as Usopp thought of what to do and what to say.

Eventually, Usopp took a break, and approached the gravestone, and stood shoulder to shoulder with Luffy. Luffy turned, his shoulder leaning against Usopp’s briefly as he chirped, “I’ll let you two talk,” and Luffy rejoined the others, giving Usopp some privacy.

“Hi… Uhm… Hi Mr. Agate,” Usopp started, twiddling his thumbs together as he began to speak, “I heard what happened. What… What Gemma did to you… and to me, by association. I… I just wanted to say… thank you for thinking of me. A stranger to your town… thanks for wanting to save me… and that… that you succeeded. My friends carried on your will. I wish they could have saved you too.”

Usopp thought of his mother growing still in her bed.

Tears came and Usopp choked, “My mom probably… probably died from toxic fumes herself you know. Not an intentional poisoning but an accidental one. She had to give up a lot for me, and you gave up a lot for your family.” Usopp lifted his head and grinned, “And you did it. You died, but your family is still here, and they made it. After learning all about you… I think that's what mattered to you. Your family.”

Usopp thought about his mother’s smile, and even the old memory of his father, which he still clung to, “I think my parents were like you… just a different shade, a different version of people who thought they were doing right by their family. And they tried… and succeeded in their own way… but I think you did it best. I think you put your family first in the correct way and I…”

“I guess I want to say thank you. Hearing about you… well, it’s been a very good story. And stories can heal, and can spurn legends, if you tell them right. So… I’m going to tell your story.” Usopp waved a hand in front of him, palm flat and moving slowly as if scanning a horizon, “I’m going to talk about a man who chose his family and saved his town, and saved a Pirate. About his actions not only saved a pirate’s life, but that his actions transcended through time, reached back… and healed a family.”

Usopp swallowed and wiped the tears from his cheeks, “Some questions were answered for me. Inadvertently sure… but all of this… made me think about my Mom, and how she died. I always thought it was from getting sick… and it’s… it’s not comforting realizing that was only part of it, and that the other half was that… that she probably made herself work due to the mishandling of her chemical creations. Due to her improperly vented shed… but even if the answer makes me sad, it makes me…”

Usopp sighed and shook his head back and forth, “I know the truth now, and the truth is something. You accidentally sold me poison and died in your last moments trying to beg for me to be spared. Thank you… thank you. You’re going to come out to sea with me, just like my Mom, and even my Dad. Mr. Agate… I’m gonna make you a legend!”

Usopp smiled and put his palm flat on the stone.

He thought of the gruff, greasy-haired man who had negotiated prices with him a long time ago. He did not know that man’s smile, but Usopp imagined it was great.

Pulling back, he turned back to his friends, the crew that waited for him. The sky was as blue as the sea painted behind them. His Nakama grinned, and Usopp grinned back.

He thought of his goal. Of the want he had, to be a brave warrior of the sea. There had, very quietly, been a second part to that wish. A part Usopp had kept to himself, a part that required him to be brave. The second part of his wish, had been that he wanted to know what to say to his father when they met up again. 

And Usopp knew now what to say. His Mom… had died trying her best. Usopp hadn’t understood, hadn’t thought Banchina’s passing was anything but cruel. But Banchina had died doing her best. She had taken the choice, she and Yasopp had made together, and while Usopp didn’t like it… she had lived it. She worked odd jobs, and locked herself in a shed, effectively poisoning and exhausting herself beyond all repair. She had died not because of foolishness, but because of love, and because she had tried to do her best for Usopp.

To ere was human, and Usopp, at last, could understand his mother had made mistakes, but they were mistakes made out of love for her family.

Not in neglect of him.

She’d died trying her best.

And Usopp wasn’t angry anymore.

Because he had pretended, and he had lied, but Usopp had been angry at both of them, Yasopp and Banchina. 

It was why his hallucination of his mother grew more and more frightening. It’s why she gave him such terrible advice. It’s why the illusion of her was a monster, and the monster had almost killed him.

But the reality of his mother, the one under the sea with him in the heart of Merry, did everything for Usopp out of love.

And while she had still died and left him, and while it still hurt, Usopp understood.

And he knew what story he wanted to tell his father now when they reunited.

“Usopp!” Luffy called interrupting the sniper’s thoughts, extending a hand to him with a joyous grin, “Do you feel well enough to go out to sea?”

Usopp grinned at his Nakama, his family, feeling that familiar call surge in him. The call he was afraid to answer alone. Skipping up, leaning towards his crew he called out, “Oh, Yeah! Luffy! Take me to the sea!”

He joined the people they loved, and he laughed, his lungs clear, his body scarred and healthy. And the hands that brought him from the brink, supported him, all the rest of the way to the Sunny...

And they set sail.

End