Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Rey was dying.

The sounds were too much. The lights were blinding. The conversation she was trying so hard to navigate and keep up with was swiftly becoming an incoherent blur.

She and Ben were so looking forward to this night. It was Finn and Poe’s engagement party- an event which all of their friendship group had anticipated for many years, so clearly soulmates were they-and they had congregated at their favourite restaurant in order to celebrate with laughs and lots of alcohol.

Rey had worn her best outfit , a satin lemon dress which complemented her tanned and freckle dusted skin radiantly, applied a light amount of makeup, and prepared everything she needed for the occasion almost a week ahead. Her noise cancelling headphones, chewing gum to ground herself and a small piece of modelling clay she could lose herself in the feel of incase things got too much.

Things did get too much.

Once the starters had been devoured and an alarmingly large amount of vodka had been drunk by Rose- how such a small person could manage to remain functional after that much booze was a mystery- Rey began to feel the telltale signs of sensory overstimulation creep up on her.

Her vision was becoming distorted, her whole body stiff, her head and hands began to shake and her previous witty contributions had ceased.

Ben, who had sat directly in front of her as if to shield her from the burgeoning roars of noise and dizzying bustles of movement, had picked up on her discomfort right away, as if always attuned to her body language and mannerisms.

‘Rey,’ he whispered softly to her, momentarily pulling her out of her trance like state of mutism. ‘Are you alright Sweetheart?’

Rey most certainly was not alright. But this was a big night for Poe and Finn, she wasn’t about to let her own body and mind force her to ruin it?

Rey nodded abstractly and uttered an unconvincing hum of agreement.

She would be okay. Her burnout for the rest of the next day was a small price to pay for being part of this special day and her chosen family’s precious happiness.

Only when her body began to rock and sway of its own accord was Ben assured that she was reaching meltdown territory.

‘Sweetheart, I’m going to take us somewhere quieter, is that alright with you?’ Ben asked softly, his large, adorable, whiskey coloured eyes resonating his concern, whilst his whole demeanour tried to radiate calmness in an attempt to stop Rey from panicking.

Rey nodded once more, unsteady on her feet as he took her by the hand and pulled her out of her seat.

Ben turned to the rest of the group,
‘We’re just going to take a moment outside, Hux make sure Rose doesn’t pass out from inebriation’

Hux managed an uneasy smile and assured him that he would , whilst the others had their eyes fixed empathetically on Rey.

They had all been so lovely when Rey had told them about her diagnosis of Autism around two years ago, each soothing her fears by telling her that she was still their best friend, still Rey, no matter what. However, Rey still felt nuances of fear around the subject- no one wanted to say the wrong thing, no one wanted to bring it up and make her upset, and everyone still treated her as if she were ordinary.

But she wasn’t ordinary. Ordinary was something that Rey had to strive to pursue, draining her of all of her energy and making her question her identity on a daily basis.

Rey was different , and she had come to terms with this fact and begun to nurture the steady beginnings of self love despite it . It was times like these when she wished she could just maintain her mask of normality all the time.

Rey was dragged from her thoughts as she suddenly found herself outside with Ben, huddled in a small corner of solitude, the cool night air calming her inflamed cheeks.

‘Rey, Sweetheart, what do you need? You don’t have to speak, just try to let me know...’

Ben had seen Rey like this plenty of times, too many times to count, and yet there was still some part of her which felt ashamed at being a burden. At being different.

‘Hold me, please. I need pressure’ Rey managed to squeak out, her voice constricted and her rocking overtaking her whole body, causing it to ache with tension.

Immediately Ben engulfed his large form around her, his body molding against hers as if they were one, the pressure of his arms around her slowing Rey’s breathing.

‘I’m sorry, Ben... I’m sorry... I don’t mean to ruin everything’ Rey spoke in great shuddering gasps, conveying her feeling of disappointment in herself , in the situation, in life.

‘Sshh Sweetheart...sshh...Listen to me, you have never ruined and will never ruin anything by being who you are.’

He stroked her hair repetitively the way he knew she liked, grounding her and transporting her back to the present.

‘It’s alright, you’re safe, you’re here with me.’ Ben voiced the mantra which she found useful in calming her meltdowns, kissing the crown of her head softly.

‘It’s such a special night for them ... will they be mad? Will they be disappointed?’

Rey felt tears forming at the corners of her eyes, her mind reeling with frustration and sadness that her she could have missed valuable moments with her friends. Her challenging upbringing as an orphan and her whole life spent feeling dissimilar from everyone else, oblivious to her autism, had made moments with people who loved and cherished her sparse.

‘Rey, my love, no one is disappointed. Yes, it is a special night for them, but do you realise how special you are to me? Your well-being and comfort is my main priority right now, and frankly if they can’t understand then that’s their problem, not yours Sweetheart.’

He was gazing at her with such open adoration, it almost made Rey want to curl up and hide away, frightened that this moment would not continue, that he would suddenly decided she was too much work.That he would decide to leave her.

‘I know what you’re thinking.’ Ben grazed the apple of her cheek gently with his thumb. ‘I’m not going to leave you Rey.Never. You’re my everything.’

‘How do you always know what I’m thinking Ben?’ Rey gave a wet chuckle, her heart bursting with how lucky she was that fate had brought them together.

‘What can I say , Sweetheart? I’m very perceptive’ Ben retorted smugly and pulled her in for a quick but meaningful peck on the cheek.

Her friends had understood her abrupt departure, Ben reassured her for the rest of the night, as they returned home and got snuggled up in a fortress of fluffy blankets.Ben chivalrously allowed Rey to watch her favourite movie for the millionth time since their relationship had started without complaint .

Maybe she hadn’t ruined everything after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Text

If one thing is for certain, Rey doesn’t feel things by half.

She loves the sun and the way it gently warms and relaxes her in summer and brings out her freckles. She loves reading novels and being so engrossed to the point of losing sleep reading just ‘one’ more chapter. She loves animals, especially their cat BeeBee, whose ginger and white bedecked fur is so soft, it’s like a veritable balm to the soul.

‘Like’ is a word just not intense enough for Rey’s vocabulary.

The thing that Rey loves the most though, is the popular sci-fi series ‘Galaxy wars’.

Rey’s fixation began when Ben introduced her to them- although she had heard of it before, the orphanage she grew up in wasn’t a place where a vast array of movies were available.

Ben saw her hazel orbs light up with glee the moment the titles started rolling, and the triumphant fanfare score reverberated around their tiny flat.He knew then he had achieved a success.

Or maybe it was more of a mistake .From that moment on, 95% of the movies they consumed were part of the galaxy wars franchise. If Ben was forced to listen to Rey perform the entire dialogue of the movies without flaw again, it might drive him insane.

Although Rey loved the action and intricately woven storyline of the movies, Ben was convinced there was one one significant reason for her infatuation.

Kylo Ren.The infamously brooding bad boy, naughty nephew of Luke Skywalker.

More specifically, Rey loved the romance between Kylo and the fiercely independent heroine, Kira Ren.

Ben could understand why. The idea that two people are so in tune and connected that they share a soul, a bond that cannot be severed, a dynamic so purely intimate and rare.

He need look no further for real life proof of that than his Rey beside him, curled up under a plethora of blankets and flapping her hands in sheer joy as the movie reaches its climax.

It was on Halloween of last year when Ben decided to put his foot down to her borderline unhealthy special interest.

‘Ben...you know the costume party that Rose is holding next week?’ Rey asked sweetly, so demure that Ben immediately felt warning bells go off in his head.

‘Yes, sweetheart?’

‘ I was thinking ... what if we went as Kylo and Kira? Wouldn’t that be so fun ! I could make our costumes.... order us lightsabers online...Ooh! We could take so many pictures...’

As Rey rambled on in a paroxysm of excitement, Ben’s palms began to sweat at the thought of having to wear that heavy mask all night long.

Just as he was about to adamantly refuse her offer, Ben felt himself melt at the utter exhilaration painted across Rey’s face.

That’s how Ben ended up turning up to Rose and Hux’s Halloween costume party, clad in a homemade, all black tunic and a mask in which he was severely deprived of oxygen.

It is impossible to say no to her. Especially when she wears those three adorable buns as homage, rivalling Kira herself.

A while into Rey’s Galaxy wars obsession , she resolutely declared to him her plans of getting a tattoo to commemorate her love.

‘Sweetheart, are you sure you really want to do this? I know you love it , but why don’t you choose something that’s less...I don’t know...permanent?’

Rey merely wrinkled her nose up to this suggestion. Her mind was made up.Her love was too strong to reconsider.

‘Isn’t that glowstick thingey supposed to blue?’ Ben pointed to the delicate ,minimalist design of a lightsaber, yellow and golden as the sun.

‘It’s a Kyber Crystal , Ben. And they come in many different colours I’ll have you know.’ Rey huffed, offended that he seemed not to absorb her extensive library of knowledge on the subject.

‘Oh right,yes of course how could I forget...’

After this discussion, Rey’s obsession seemed to become less open.

Before, she used to settle on the sofa and unabashedly watch the movies on repeat. Now she sat in their room, armed with a pair of headphones as to not play it out loud.

Before,somehow Rey managed to divert every topic of conversation subtly back to Galaxy wars, sharing niche facts and explaining her endless love for certain characters. Now she remained fixed on whatever the allocated object of discussion was, never once making any reference.

Despite his better judgement, Ben began to miss it.

He began to miss the animated gleam in her eyes, the epitome of adoration.

Ben questioned her one night when Rey had had a particularly hard day at work, overwhelmed and overstimulated too much to operate.

‘I have an idea Sweetheart, why don’t I put on Galaxy wars? That might help.’ Ben proffered, lovingly stroking her hair in an effort to relax her.

‘No thanks Ben.’ Rey sniffed.

‘ Come on Rey, it’s your favourite! We haven’t watched it in so long... don’t you like it anymore ?’

Rey looked sheepish, avoiding Ben’s enthusiastic gaze.

‘ Of course I do.It’s just ... I know you find it annoying whenever we watch it , or I talk about it...’

In that moment , Ben’s heart broke. The one thing that gave Rey comfort, that made her feel safe and content, he had somehow made her feel ashamed of being interested in.

‘Oh,sweetheart.What gave you that impression? I love watching you get excited about the things you love. I love to see you happy.’ Ben lifted her chin up to meet his gaze, in order to reinforce his point.

‘Really? I thought I was being annoying... I know that sometimes when I talk about it you just pretend to listen...I know that sometimes it’s a bit much ...’

‘Rey. Anything that you love, I support it. Do you want to know why?’ Ben gazed at her adoringly , the intensity of his expression almost unnerving. She was so unused to this unadulterated feeling of acceptance.

‘Because I love you, Rey. My Sweetheart.’

The next day Ben had a surprise in store for Rey. To her complete shock, he had rolled up the sleeve of his sweater and proudly showed off his newly inked tattoo.

A lightsaber, with a cross guard hilt, the kyber crystal a volatile shade of red , it’s vibrancy entrancing Rey.

‘This way, we can both share your special interest.’ To which Rey responded with a flurry of peppered kisses on his lovely face.

Yes, Rey loves a great many things, including Galaxy wars.

Most of all though - she loves Ben.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Text

Rey had been working as a waitress for around three months now.

‘Jakku diner’ was just around the corner from her flat with Ben, and so far her the role suited her reasonably well.

Rey appreciated the steady flow of people, the regulars who ordered the same thing day and day out, the familiarity of her routine.

So far she had befriended the wizened old man who sat at the back of the diner and ordered a sensible breakfast of toast and black coffee every day, without fail.

Mr.Kenobi was his name, and Rey couldn’t help feeling a pang of sympathy tug at her heart at the look in his eyes as he thanked her for his meal.He was a man who had seen a great many things and lost a great many people in his journey.

She had also become acquainted with the vibrant, and hucksterish , Mr.Calrissian , who entered the establishment with a new female companion every time. He was an old Smoothie.

‘Call me Lando, Sweetheart’ he had told Rey upon their first meeting, shamelessly flashing her a debonair smile, to which she responded with an admonishing shake of her head and a hearty chuckle.

Rey enjoyed having the fixed and repetitive script of ‘What can I get for you today?’ and ‘Enjoy your meals!’ to rely on.

She enjoyed having the small tag on her uniform which read in bold font ‘ Hello, my name is REY’, leaving introductions unnecessary and allowing her to focus on taking orders rather than overthinking on how to interact with customers.

Of course Rose, Hux and the newly engaged Lovebirds Finn and Poe came to visit her whilst she was on shift. Needless to say, that day she received the biggest tip of her whole waitressing career.

What Rey didn’t enjoy, was her morally questionable boss. Mr.Plutt.

Finding a job had proved an extremely difficult feat for Rey in the past.

‘After careful review, we have decided you are not suitable for this role. Thank you for applying.’ Was a phrase she had heard more times than she could count.

Plutt, despite his many, many flaws was the only person willing to employ her.

Rey couldn’t decide whether it was a miracle, or a red flag. Probably the latter.

Recently Plutt had been pressuring Rey to work more shifts, kindly reminding her of how generous he was at giving her a chance, without any previous experience.

Whilst Ben tried to persuade Rey to refuse, worried for his beloved’s health and the burnout she would undoubtedly suffer from, Rey ended up working the late shift from 8:00-12:00 every night of the week.

Until one day Ben received a message.

Rey💕🌞: Pls come and pick me up Ben.

The moment he saw the message Ben knew something was wrong. Rey was an extravagant texter, always sending a miscellany of coloured hearts and emojis Ben had never even seen before.

Besides that, it was only 9:30, and she was due to finish at 12:00.

Ben: Of course Sweetheart, right away. What’s wrong?? Are you hurt??

Rey💕🌞: just come quickly. Please

He needed no further prompting than that. His knuckles turned an alarming shade of white as he clutched the steering wheel of the millennium falcon, ( a hand me down car from his Father , Han, after he passed), and raced to Jakku Diner.

As soon as he arrived, his scanning eyes caught a glimpse of Rey outside the steps.
Her three buns were dishevelled and wild tendrils hung from the sides, her freckled cheeks were red and tear stained. She was very clearly agitated from the way she was moving herself, her hands and head shaking of their own accord.

Stimming, Ben mentally noted, recalling everything he had learnt from Rey about autism and behaviours .

He had never seen her so upset, not ever, and he wanted to tear the very heart out of the person who had hurt hers. Hurt his Sweetheart.

Rey looked up with heavy, swollen eyes at Ben as he slammed the falcon’s door shut.

‘Rey, who did this ? Who made you cry? I’ll kill them.’ Ben snarled menacingly, his eyes taking on a wild gleam of protectiveness which terrified Rey to the very core at what he might do.

‘B-Ben...I’m s-sorry ... Can’t speak very well... M-meltdown...’ Rey managed translate with great, fractured sobs ripping through her ribcage.

‘Sshh, it’s okay Rey. It’s okay, just breathe, I’ve got you. It’s alright.Do you need pressure?’

Rey nodded solemnly, face contorted in discomfort and anguish, clinging to Ben as she found herself in his arms.

‘It’s alright, Sweetheart.’ Ben cooed in her ear, trying to soothe her as she continued to shake and wheeze.

‘You need your headphones? I brought an extra pair just in case.’

‘Yes please...’ Rey took them gratefully, the cushioned pads which engulfed her ears giving her a brief sense of relief and solace from the surrounding, panic inducing world around her.

When the painful cries racking through her ceased, she managed to explain the source of her meltdown.

‘Too many people. Over stimulated.I started stimming. Someone complained that it looked strange, me flapping my hands and head shaking.’ Rey uttered out slowly.

Ben felt consumed with rage. Why couldn’t people just mind their own business and be kind?

‘Plutt came over. He told me to stop. I told him it was involuntary... he -he...threatened to fire me...’

Rey took a deep breath to steady herself, in order to continue.

‘I told him I’m autistic. That it’s a disability,
and that he can’t fire me for that. It isn’t allowed. It isn’t fair, Ben.’ Rey sniffed indignantly.

‘H-he said... if he had known I was a freak, he wouldn’t have hired me in the first place.’

Ben clenched his jaw so hard he thought he teeth might shatter.

‘I quit Ben. I told him that if he couldn’t accept me for who I was, I wouldn’t want to work for him anyway.’

‘That bastard.’ Was all Ben could say, stroking Rey’s cheek and pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead.

‘ I’m sorry,Rey. I’m sorry that people are so cruel. But you know , I’m so proud of you my love...’

Rey burrowed further in Ben’s safe arms.

‘Really?’

‘Yes, really. You didn’t give him the privilege of firing you, you stood up for yourself sweetheart. You showed him who was in charge.’ He whispered lovingly, proud of how fierce Rey had become and how she wouldn’t give anyone the chance to judge who she was, without defending herself.

‘Thank you, Ben.’ Rey murmured, exhausted from the emotional and physical turmoil she had endured.
‘I love you.’

‘I love you too Sweetheart.More than anything.’

After a moments silence, each of them taking comfort and strength in each other’s arms, Rey’s head popped up in a startled manner.

‘Oh bugger, Ben...’ Her English slang expletive causing a slight smile to spread across his face.

‘I left my stuff inside. I was so upset I just left everything. My bag has my wallet in, and my keys...’ Rey’s breath begin to pick up pace again.

‘Sweetheart, I’ll go in and get it for you. You stay here. Will you be alright here? I’ll be as quick as I can.’ Ben answered, determined to do anything so long as it meant Rey could avoid any more pain or sadness.

‘Yes, Ben. Please don’t make a scene though! It’s over now, he can never boss me around again.’

Ben just gave Rey a quick kiss on the lips as a response, softly herding her into the falcon to assure himself that she was safe.

He couldn’t promise anything.

A sickly sweet, saccharine bell rung as Ben opened the diner door.

He made his way through past the packed tables of drinkers. The surrounding discord was so intense, no wonder Rey felt overwhelmed.

His eyes were invaded by a greasy lump of a figure. No other than the thing that had upset his love.

‘If you’re going to take up space you need to buy something.’ Plutt drawled out lazily, his foul odour permeating the air and making Ben want to gag.

‘Oh, I’m not here for any of that toxic waste you pass as food. I’m here to talk.’

Plutt last eyes widened as he finally looked up and was greeted with Ben’s gigantic , and wrathful presence towering over him.

‘H-how can I help you Sir?’ Plutt stuttered nervously, his palms beginning to sweat at Ben’s look of murderous intent.

‘You just made the biggest mistake of your life. That precious woman out there- the one you called a freak- is the most hardworking and talented person your filthy diner will have the privilege to employ...’ Ben seethed.

‘She also happens to be the love of my life, and the only reason why your face is still intact right now rather than an unrecognisable slab of meat is because you did her favour by showing her your true colours. She’ll find something better. Somewhere that appreciates her and supports her for who she is...’

Plutt looked seconds away from spoiling himself out of sheer terror.

‘And if you for whatever reason insult her or even come near her ever again, you’ll be sorry.’

With that, Ben grabbed Rey’s stuff and made a hasty retreat, concerned about how Rey was doing in the falcon.

Burnout from all of the night’s agitation, he found her curled up and snoring heavily. It always amused him how she could make such an ungodly sound.

Careful not to wake her, Ben drove them home.

Over the next few weeks, Rey and Ben scoured job websites, newspapers and local notice boards together in search for jobs.

That was until Leia told them about an opening for a waitress at a place near her in the outskirts of D'Qar, ‘Maz’s place’.

Maz was a lovely,if a tad eccentric, woman who treated all of the staff at her cafe like family rather than employees , and had seen everyone and everything in her time.
Rey was made completely at ease the moment Maz ushered her in for her interview , with a soothing ‘Come on in child.’

She was given sensible shifts, allowed to wear her noise cancelling headphones if things got too noisy and given plenty of regular breaks.

Rey had never been so comfortable and happy, and promised herself never again to settle for anything or anyone that treated her with less than she deserved.

If she forgot that promise, Ben was always there to remind her with a heart full of love and pride for his brilliant girl.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Text

*Present day*

‘So, tell us how you two met?’

Ben and Rey glanced at each other , completely at a loss at where to begin.

‘Erm...’

*Two years ago*

The tale of how Ben and Rey met is an interesting one to say the least.

It all dates back to the day when the formidable CEO of ‘First Order enterprises’ stepped into the quaint and unassuming bookshop, with ‘The Resistance’ plastered on the exterior in alarmingly vibrant colours.

The whole place was littered with books of all genres; paper backs, hard backs, even magazines. The air resonated the smell of freshly brewed coffee and confectionaries .

Ben had to admit, it did have an air of serenity about it, which he wouldn’t mind sticking around to witness a little longer. But he came to do a job, and do it he would.

As if to remind him, his phone pinged aggressively.

SNOKE: The Resistance has been a thorn in my side for too long now , Boy. Make sure you finish the job, or I won’t be pleased.

Snoke. Ben had worked for him for over a decade and still was none the wiser to his first name. Then again a man with that amount of power didn’t need a first name. It might threaten making him seem more human.

With a disgruntled sigh and a quick response of ‘Yes sir. I won’t let you down.’ , Ben slid his phone back into the pocket of his designer suit. He was just in time to be ambushed by a woman with lilac hair.
The owner, Ben thought wryly, judging on her chosen colour palette being identical to the vivid interior of the establishment.

‘Hello there , Sir! How can I help you today? Any books in particular you’re looking for?’ The woman chirped.

Ben felt conflicted.This woman was clearly consumed with love for her business. He would be the one to destroy that love.

‘No thank you, m’aam. Listen...’

‘Amilyn!My name is Amilyn Holdo.’ The woman supplied, her continued look of intense friendliness evidence that she was unaware of the bombshell Ben was about to drop on her.

‘Miss.Holdo. My name is Kylo Ren and I am the CEO of First Order Enterprises...’

Amilyn’s smile dropped.

‘The Resistance hasn’t been doing well as of late.To cut to the chase, I’m afraid I will have to be forced to shut it down. Business orders.’

Ben felt his chest constrict with guilt as Amilyn’s face crumpled in despair and her eyes brimmed with emotion, as if having been told she had lost one of her children.

‘I’m sorry M’aam. Unfortunately there’s nothing you can do-‘

‘Hey! You.’

Ben was cut off by an angry sounding female voice, turning around to see the interrupter.

Only to see the most perfect woman he had ever had the privilege of laying eyes on in his entire life.

Her hair was left half up half down, effortlessly stunning. Her rosy cheeks were flushed with passion. The bridge of her nose was sprinkled with delicious freckles, like stars upon the night sky canvas.

She also wore a pair of headphones.Although a slightly peculiar fashion choice, Ben thought it adorable.

She was a vision to him.The personification of radiance itself.

‘I’m talking to you mister!...’ The girl continued, snapping Ben from his trance of adoration.

‘Rey, it’s alright. It’s ok.’ Amilyn sniffed, despite looking like the world had just crumbled down around her.

Rey. A Rey of sunlight... Ben mused dreamily, standing there veritably gaping at the mouth.

‘No, it’s not okay. I’ve been coming here for six years, ever since I moved to coruscant, and all that time this incredible woman has slaved away constantly to keep this bookshop standing.’ The girl, Rey, spoke indignantly.

Ben’s jaw snapped shut.

‘Then you waltz in here, Mr “CEO” , with your fancy suit and brooding face...’

She thinks my suits is fancy, Ben preened mentally.

‘...With the audacity to inform her that her whole career is being ‘shut down’? I know your type. I’ve met you before. You work at a corrupt, million dollar firm which has no concept of joy, doing anything to earn some financial gain. You’re a monster.’ Rey spat out venomously, her hands appearing to be shaking with the intensity of her hatred.

Ben was shocked to the core. No one had ever spoken to him like this before.Yet here she was, this fierce and beautiful woman stood before him, holding nothing back.

‘ Miss...Rey...’ The name rolled off of his tongue, as he savoured the syllable.

‘I apologise.But there’s nothing I can do. The shop simply doesn’t have enough revenue to continue.’

‘Well then, what must be done to help make that revenue, hm?’ Rey retorted, refusing to back down from a fight.

‘Improving marketing and sales. If enough money is made, then perhaps we can consider keeping The Resistance open.

‘What do you suggest, then? To improve it?’ Rey continued, a determined gleam in her eye.

‘Well... I guess I could discuss some ideas with you... how about I buy you a coffee and we can talk over the different options? It doesn’t have to be coffee...It could be tea... or hot chocolate...’

Ben continued to list a variety of available beverages before Rey stopped him with her answer.

Smooth, Solo.Real smooth, Ben could hear his father chastising him from the beyond for his awkward approach at flirting.

‘Oh.Well... alright then.I guess that would be acceptable.’ Rey acquiesced, her cheeks still glowing with emotion.

‘Perfect.’ Ben beamed.

Rey’s day had been going fine up until her encounter with Mr ‘CEO’ at The Resistance.

She had visited in order to procure another book for her collection, as she did most weekends, and ending up surprising herself at the temerity in which she addressed the businessman.

The Handsome businessman, her brain supplied unhelpfully.

So here she was, sat across from ‘Kylo Ren’, he had introduced himself as, warming her hands around the comforting feel of her chamomile and lavender tea.

Rey had suggested going to the quiet cafe around the corner from The Resistance, knowing that it was rarely busy and would likely not overstimulate her with a noisy atmosphere.

Perhaps that was a mistake... maybe he’ll shut this place down too. Then I’ll have no where left to go, Rey mused sardonically.

‘S-so...what are you ideas?’ Rey questioned him, Amilyn sat beside her in their booth, slightly nervous now the fury of her previous showdown with him had dissipated. Now he was just a stranger sat in front of her, expecting conversation and eye contact. Two things that Rey struggled with quite often.

Kylo Ren didn’t appear put off though. He continued to stare at Rey with the same look he had gifted her with the moment he saw her.

Was it fondness? Or successfully veiled resentment?

Rey couldn’t be entirely sure, not the most adept at reading facial expressions on a good day.

‘Well, there are a few things to consider. Miss.Holdo, you offer food and drink to your customers do you not?’ Ben queried, his rich, whiskey coloured eyes tempting Rey to steal glimpses of his face.

Get yourself together, Rey. She mentally chastised herself.

‘I suggest that you create a section in which your customers can sit down. People are more likely to give money if they can meet friends there.If they can spend the afternoon reading with a drink.’

Amilyn nodded diligently, absorbing his suggestions.

‘Social media is also a large tool for businesses these days. You create an account online for the Resistance, you can promote your inventory, and keep customers updated on special events...’

After an afternoon of business proposals, and frantic note taking from Amilyn, Ben decided to subtly take another shot at conversation with Rey.
In which she hopefully wouldn’t want to kill him, and he hopefully wouldn’t act like such a Nerfherder.

‘So, Rey...’ He began, already forgetting his lines due to the curious and somewhat nervous look on her precious face at what he was about to say.

‘Yes?’

‘Will we... I mean l... will I see you again?’ He fumbled, failing miserably at trying to not look like a lovesick fool.

‘Oh...do you - do you want to see me again?’ She looked shocked, her hazel eyes widened comically.

‘Yes.I think I would.Very much.’ His face looked so incredibly soft and vulnerable, Rey couldn’t say no even if she wanted to.

She didn’t want to. She wanted to see him again too.

‘Ok then...I pop by The Resistance every weekend. Maybe I’ll see you there helping Amilyn?’ Rey proffered, trying to curb her enthusiasm and stop it from showing so obviously.

‘You’re perfect.’ Ben uttered, and Rey’s heart stuttered. Had she heard him correctly?

‘Excuse me?’

‘ Wait- I mean... that’s perfect. It’s perfect you’ll be there because so will I. Perfect.’
If Ben said perfect one more time he might physically combust.

Rey just giggled at his face, flushed scarlet with embarrassment reaching to the tips of his adorably large ears.

Typically, as a rule, Rey wasn’t a big fan of physical contact she didn’t voluntarily initiate. But something about him made her reconsider, as she slipped her hand into his larger one and shook.

‘It was nice to meet you, Kylo Ren.’

‘You too, Rey.’

When next they met, Ben dressed more casually in an attempt to seem less insipid of joy and humanity.

A soft black sweater, paired with jeans. If he had spent an extra hour on his hair this morning in preparation for seeing Rey again, no one had to know.

Rey herself wore a floral summer dress and her pair of worn out docs. Her hair was pulled up in three buns,a trademark of hers, framed by her headphones again.

‘Hello, Kylo.’ Rey initiated.

‘Hullo, Rey. You look beautiful.’

She blushed, unused to his open manner and his easiness in giving compliments.

‘Thank you so much.So do you ... shall we sit?’ Rey offered, pointing to cafe area which Amilyn had installed upon Ben’s suggestion.

The pair talked for hours, about everything and nothing. Rey told him about her love of reading, confided in her upbringing as an orphan.Ben listened, and in turn spoke of his affinity for reading too, when work allowed him the time , and his fractious relationship with his father

‘So how did you get into your line of business, Kylo?’ Rey questioned him, sipping intermittently at her herbal tea.

‘Ben...’ He fixed his eyes on his mug of black coffee, afraid she might think him strange for seemingly hiding his real name. ‘ It’s Ben. Ben Solo. It’s not really Kylo, that’s my ...work title.’

‘Ben Solo.’ Rey beamed at him. ‘I like that.It suits you.’

Im that moment, Ben knew he would devote his life to making her bestow upon him that darling smile as often as possible.

They met again the weekend after, sitting in their usual spot and cherishing the other’s company.

Ben thought he would breach question he had long since been curious about.

‘you never told me why you wear those headphones...’

‘You never asked.’ Rey responded sharply, indoctrinated to be defensive from all of the people who had mocked her for wearing them in the past, oblivious to the reason why.

Ben could see he had resurrected perhaps past moments of censure in her mind, and felt a pang of guilt for not expressing his adoration of them more clearly.

‘Oh Rey, I wasn’t criticising them... not in the least. I think they’re adorable. It’s just, is there a medical reason you wear them? You don’t have to tell me, I just thought it might make you feel more at ease if I knew.’

She looked away for a moment, unsure as to whether to give that sacred information she guarded so closely to her being.Whether to make herself vulnerable to him.

‘I’m autistic. That means that I see and experience things differently to everyone else.’ Rey took a deep breath, still afraid of meeting his eyes.

‘The headphones are to protect me from noise. Too much noise can overwhelm me. It’s painful.’

She began to stim , hands shaking as a result of the effort it took to reveal such an important thing to Ben, someone she had met only a fortnight ago.

Rey trusted him. Strangely more than anyone she had met before.But people were complex beings. They wouldn’t always react like you wanted them to, she knew that from past experience.

‘Rey...’ Ben suddenly engulfed Rey’s petite hands in his own freakishly large ones.
‘Rey... you’re perfect. If you thought that that would for whatever reason make me think less of you, or ruin our friendship, you’re wrong. I care about you Rey.A lot.’

He brought her knuckles to his lips and brushed a tender kiss against them.Her eyes welled with tears. She had never had someone accept her so easily before.

‘Ben... I care about you too.’ She replied, sniffing in an attempt to hide her overflowing emotion for the man before her.

‘May I kiss you?’ Ben leaned in slightly, his eyes transfixed on her lips and consumed with what looked like immense affection. Love, Rey thought unconsciously.

‘Yes, Ben. Please kiss me.’ She whispered, her face seconds away from his.

The kiss was gentle and soft, Ben’s lips soft and warm. He cupped her jaw and stroked it lightly, causing her to melt into his palm.

‘What do we have here then, Kylo?’

A chilling voice caused the pair to reluctantly pull away from each other.

‘S-Snoke, Sir.I can explain...’ Ben croaked,as he was greeted with the stony, disapproving glare of his boss.

‘You had better do , my Boy. And,who,
Is this little thing?’

Snoke shifted his stare at Rey, his serpent eyes rolling over her, making her want to run away and hide.

Ben stiffened a little at the questionable look directed at Rey and moved slightly further in front of her.

‘This is Rey. She-‘

‘Ren, I pay you to shut down businesses that are no longer fruitful. Not fraternise with the enemy. Even if they are rather attractive.’

Ben felt a growl rise in his throat at the way Snoke was addressing Rey. He wouldn’t let anyone speak to her like that.

He was just about to give Snoke a piece of his mind, unfazed by how it might threaten his career, before Rey interjected.

‘I don’t work here. I’m a friend. And his name is Ben, not Kylo, you insidious Snake.’ Rey spat, glaring at him with fire in her eyes, even more than in their first meeting.

‘My, My! You have found a spitfire, haven’t you, Boy?’ Snoke chuckled, equal parts shocked and amused at her obstinance.
‘Do you know who I am, girl? I’m the owner of First Order Enterprises. I could have a young thing like you removed in a heartbeat...’

That was it. Ben was willing to subject himself to the cruelty of men like Snoke, but he wouldn’t let anyone even consider harming Rey.

‘You will not threaten her like that.’ Ben snapped, with a guttural noise leaving his throat.

‘I see. You have compassion for her, don’t you , Boy? Ah, you do.’ Snoke jaw set, bored of their open defiance now and ready to destroy them.

What came out of Ben’s mouth next left him speechless.

‘I quit.’

Rey took Ben’s hand, glancing at him in disbelief. Would he really leave his job because of her?

‘You can keep your worthless money and reputation. It means nothing to me. You mean nothing to me. Don’t ever contact me again.’ Ben spoke, a figurative weight lifted from his shoulders.

He ushered Rey towards the door of The Resistance, ready to leave behind this part of his life forever. All because of her. His sweet girl.

‘You can send me my stuff. We’re through.’

And with that, the door slammed shut with a startling bang, and Snoke was left behind with his face set in a perpetual look of incredulity.

Ben took Rey to the cafe round the corner, the one they went to upon their first encounter, in an attempt to find some sense of calmness after that intense debacle.

‘Ben...’ Rey started once they were both sat down in a quiet booth.

‘Ben... why did you do that?’

He took her freckled face in his hands, pressing his forehead gently against hers.

‘I don’t like how he spoke to you. I don’t like how he speaks to me. He threatened you, Rey. I can’t ever allow that.’

Rey leaned in for a tear stained kiss, overcome by how much Ben valued and cherished her.

‘Thank you,Ben.’ She whispered against his lips.

‘No, thank you, Rey. My Rey. My sweetheart.’

And the rest, as they say, was history.

*Present day*

‘We met each other at a bookshop.’
They replied in unison.

Both smiled internally as they acknowledged that that one fateful meeting which brought them together, was the best thing that had ever happened to them both.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Text

‘Sweetheart ,what on Earth is that you’re about to eat?’

Rey beamed one of those special smiles which made Ben’s heart stop.

Another thing that made his heart stop was when she would eat things that were quite frankly inedible and had the possibility of harming her.

‘Oh Ben, it’s delicious! I just invented it.’ She grinned proudly, a look of smug satisfaction on her face at being the inventor of such a fine delicacy.

‘It’s a bagel with peanut butter. But that was too plain, so I added some pickles. It still needed something sweet though, so I added some ketchup. It could still be improved...’

Ben just stared at her in equal parts disgust and disbelief, as she found the Holy Grail she was ransacking the kitchen cupboards for.

‘Marshmallows!Perfect.’ Rey took a large bite from the concoction after adding the final ingredient, showing no fear as to how it might taste.To her, everything was consumable.

‘ wanna bite Ben?’ She managed to translate around a humongous mouthful.

‘No.I love you, Rey. But never in a million years.’ Ben grabbed his plain buttered toast, making a swift exit after giving Rey a quick peck on the cheek. Not on the mouth, as he would be sure to make her brush her teeth throughly before that ever happened again.

Rey was hypo-sensitive to taste.

Anything that wasn’t strange and ungodly in flavouring to anyone else, was bland to her.

Ever since she was a child in the orphanage she gravitated towards strong flavours, the only thing available at that time for suiting her appetite being ketchup, which she doused everything in. Then she added some more.

Now though, Rey could make all of the truly peculiar and wonderful combinations her heart desired, despite the reaction it garnered from Ben and her friends.

Jam sandwiches, also slathered with gravy. Bacon and strawberry sauce. Pineapple and blue cheese.

Of course Rey couldn’t forget her personal favourite, inspired by a certain time travelling doctor. Fish fingers and custard.

Her mouth salivated at the mere thought.

‘I’m sure that’s a war crime, Rey.’ Rose grimaced when they went out to eat a couple weeks back , fixated on Rey in shock as she dipped her side of halloumi fries into a cone of pistachio ice cream.

‘Anything that tastes this good, should be a crime Rosie.’ Rey murmured, eyes closed and practically squeaking in delight as her tastebuds welcomed the unexpectedly paired flavours.

‘I’m with Rose on this one Rey, love.
You deserve to be locked up like the sicko you are. Cheese and ice cream? Are your insides not turning against you?’ Finn chuckled, light heartedly teasing her whilst Poe was passed out in unabashed hysterics beside him at Rey’s ‘refined’ food palette.

‘At least my taste buds aren’t drying up through lack of excitement.’ Rey retorted, giving a pointed look at Hux’s plain chicken salad, the leaves sitting dejectedly on a plate. The whole thing looked very sad.

‘Hey! I happen to have a lot of allergies you know...’ Hux defended himself.
‘If I could, I would be all over Finn’s extra spicy chilli.’

He spared a longing glimpse at Finn who was tucking into his meal like a man who had never seen food, looking up momentarily as if doubting that Hux could handle the heat.

Ben had gotten used to Rey’s bizarre eating habits by now.

Every time he visited the store he would be sure pick up a list of ‘essentials’ , as she dubbed them.

They mainly consisted of hot sauce, spices like turmeric and something chemically sour, (usually sour patch kids) .

However, sometimes Ben did worry for his beloved’s health.

It occurred to him the first time they had visited the festival in Pasaana together that her obsession with the unusual, could also potentially be fatal.

He had found her ravenously working her way through what appeared to be an ambiguous type of meat in a rich green sauce , but had clearly never even seen an animal in its life.

‘Rey honey, where did you get this?’ Ben asked, one quizzical eyebrow raised, looking found for nearby vendors.

‘There was a man who offered it to me, Ben. He said it was gross. He gave it me for free , Ben ! How kind is that?’ Rey continued munching through her mystery meal whilst Ben began to feel himself panic beyond compare.

‘You took it from a random man, who said it was gross ??! Rey ! How could you do that, don’t you know it could be dangerous?!’ Ben hyperventilated, snatching the questionable dish from her hands.

‘Heyy... I wasn’t finished yet.’ Rey whined, confused at his concern.
‘Don’t worry Ben, it tasted fine! Delicious even, only a hint of expiry.’

Ben promptly threw it in the trash, pulling Rey away by the hand firmly. He couldn’t even be sure she wouldn’t try to retrieve it, as bold with food as she was.

Needless to say, he kept an extra close eye on her for the rest of the day to ensure she wouldn’t suddenly keel over.

When it came to ordering food, it wasn’t exactly Rey’s forte.
It was better for her to feel comfortable, take on her surroundings and get used to the new sensory environment rather than worrying herself over what to say.

Thus, Ben gallantly took one for their little team.

Each time he was forced to ask for her eccentric conceptions, he considered leaving out the strange additions.

But the content look on her face after her strange cravings were satisfied made the ordeal worth it.

One night when they sat together contentedly, Rey invented the brand new, never been seen before pairing of strawberries and whipped cream. Of course, that wasn’t the unusual part.

That was the bowl of soy sauce she was dipping the coated berries into.

‘You have a little something, right there sweetheart...’ Ben motioned to a slight bit of stray whipped cream that had found itself on Rey’s top lip.

‘Oh! Hmmm where?’ Rey looked ridiculous trying to wipe it off with her fingers, every time failing miserably.

‘Here, love...’ Ben leant over to wipe it off successfully, giving her a sweet kiss on her upper lip.

‘I love you, Ben.’ she stated sincerely, giggling at his tender act of affection.

‘I love you too, sweetheart.’

Ben could easily tolerate his girl’s unorthodox eating habits. He could tolerate anything as long as they were together.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~