Chapter Text
“He’s going to notice.” Virgil said simply, looking around the room. Logan sighed, “He will. But his safety is most important.” He said firmly, “We’re going to have to have a longer talk with Roman, too. He’ll forget not to just randomly give him a pencil sharpener if he asks. Not to mention we need to remind him about boundaries and not being blunt.” Logan reminded, going over his mental checklist to make sure they’d gone through everything and made sure it was safe.
Virgil sighed himself, running a hand through his hair, “He’s going to hate us, you know that?” He said, side-eyeing his husband. Logan nodded, “Yes. I’m fully prepared for him to hate us at first. There will most likely be screaming, and fighting and attempts to run away. We just have to wait it out until he feels safe.” Virgil frowned, he hated the first few months. It was anxiety inducing as hell. They’d talked for a long time about fostering another kid, and they’d had a long talk with Roman about it, too. Eventually, Roman agreed, as long as they promised not to get a little kid. They didn’t want a kid too young anyways, so that was fine. Although they agreed they may get a younger kid in the future. For now, though, they wanted twelve and over.
This exact kid was... a certain situation. Because, well, this wasn’t exactly planned. Sure, they’d planned on getting another kid, but not quite so soon. This was an emergency placement, although luckily they had a couple days advance warning, but only because the kid was coming from the hospital. Why the hospital?
Because the kid they were fostering was coming straight from there after a suicide attempt.
Safe to say, it wasn’t ideal. It was extremely unideal and very unpleasant and upsetting. But hell if they were going to turn down a kid who so very clearly needed somewhere safe to go. They’d spent the last few hours emptying out the spare bedroom of any sharp objects, locking the kitchen cabinet with the knives in, etc. Roman watched them carefully the whole time they were downstairs, but he didn’t say a word to them, so neither of them said anything to him about it either.
Finally, they were done. They knew he wouldn’t be happy about having everything restricted, but they were obligated to, not only by law, but also for their own peace of mind. Legally, they only had to do the bare minimum to make sure the kid didn’t try to immediately off himself again, but for their own sake, they had to do much more. That included keeping a close eye on him, which, again, they knew he’d hate.
Now, they only had a couple hours before he was going to be dropped off. “I’m going to talk with Roman, are you going to accompany me? I may need your help if he gets upset.” Logan said. Virgil smiled at him, “Naw, i’ve got a few things i want to put in here to make it more comfortable, he’s going to be feeling a lot of anxiety. And besides, don’t doubt yourself, you know you can calm Roman down if you need to. It’s been two years now, Lo, come on, you’re an expert at this point.” It wasn’t likely Roman would get upset anyways, he was obviously capable of fully understanding the situation and why things had to be done, he just may get a bit annoyed at how some of the restrictions ended up falling to him as well by default. But unfortunately, that couldn’t be helped.
Logan scoffed lightly, but smiled back at his husband, “Alright. I’ll leave you to it.” He said before leaving, closing the door behind him. Virgil grabbed the few things he’d brought to go in the room that he’d left on the desk while they safety-proofed the room. The sheets were just plain white right now, but they were going to get him new ones when they found out what he liked. But, just for the first couple days or so, a blanket over the bed would help. He’d gotten another weighted one, much like his own, and Roman had used it a few times as well. Even Logan once. It was extremely helpful, so Virgil had gotten one for him, knowing it would help in a lot of situations.
Two, he’d gotten a couple fidget toys, they’d been informed beforehand that their new foster kid was 'special'. I.E, neurodivergent. Although the care and social workers were as unhelpful as ever with going into detail. But fidget and stim toys were good no matter what, so Virgil got a few, placing them on the desk for whenever he wanted them. He got some of the ones he liked himself, and a few others, making sure that there would hopefully be at least one that the kid would like and find useful. Still, if not, they could always get more.
Third, one he was sure would be rejected at first, but got anyway, was a weighted cat plush. It had a nice scent, too, giving it two different ways to be grounding. He had plushies, so did Roman, it wasn’t weird, you were never too old for plushies. He put it on the bed next to the pillows, sure he’d find it under the bed or tossed across the floor at some point. It shouldn’t do much damage if he decided to take out his frustration on it.
Finally, a pack of markers. A bit out of ordinary with the rest of the items he’d got, but he’d read that drawing on your arms was a good coping mechanism. Or he could use them for drawing on paper, either way. There was an empty sketchbook and a couple pencils on the desk already too, although, he’d have to ask to get the pencils sharpened, so he may prefer markers anyways. They didn’t want to take away every possible little thing that could hurt him, because then he wouldn’t feel like he had any freedom, and that would make it extremely hard to build up trust. It wasn’t exactly like living in a room that felt like a room in a psych ward was the best place to feel comfy and safe.
They had to let him know they trusted him to not hurt himself with anything he could find, for him to trust them. It was hard, and it made Virgil anxious, but he was determined to make the kid feel safe and happy again. They’d had a long conversation last night about what to do if they found him trying to hurt himself or off himself again, and although it made Virgil’s stomach twist, it had to be done to keep him safe.
He left the room, overhearing Logan and Roman talking in Roman’s room next door, but all seemed calm. He sighed to himself once more, taking a few breaths in and out, it was going to be tough. It was hard to tell if Roman would keep his distance, or be the little extrovert he was and immediately try to make friends. Hopefully they’d get along eventually, after all, they were currently hopefully working on adopting Roman (if he said yes), so he certainly wasn’t going anywhere.
He decided to go downstairs and start preparing for dinner, a nice home cooked meal was a good start, right? Yeah… he was probably sick of hospital food, anyways. And they could introduce him to Roman in a non-stress situation where he didn’t have to talk if he didn’t want to. It would be a good start, hopefully.
--
Janus scratched irritably at the bandages on his arms, huffing to himself. Stupid bandages, they itched like hell. “Janus.” He heard his care worker scold from the front of the car, glancing back at him in the rear view mirror with a scowl. He stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry, a childish response, he knew, but right then he really didn’t care. His care worker simply sighed, shook his head and kept driving.
He hated this. He hated this. God, why couldn’t he have just died? That was the fucking plan, he didn’t exactly plan for what happened if he survived. And now he was being put in emergency foster care, probably with some old farts who would pretend to be all angelic and then go and not even acknowledge his existence and barely feed him, probably not even caring if he went and tried to kill himself again. Then they’d act all innocent and like they totally oblivious and thought he was getting sooo much better, and how much of a shock it was, and how upsetting, all that fucking bullshit.
Or maybe it’d be the total opposite, they’d go all extreme on him and not let him have any kind of sharp object at all, barely a pair of damn safety scissors, or let him touch anything at all that could possibly hurt him. Nothing hot that could burn him, nothing he could hang anything off of, nothing. He’d be stuck in an empty room all day and not allowed to do a single thing unless they were watching him like a hawk. Wow, that sure sounded like fun.
Not.
As they drove round the corner into a more neighbourhood-y looking place, his case worker spoke up again, “Alright, so, their names are Virgil and Logan Sanders. They’ve been fostering another kid for two years now, by the name of Roman. He’s around the same age as you, i believe. They weren’t expecting to foster another kid so soon but decided to take you anyways, so don’t be ungrateful.” His care worker said grumpily, and that’s when Janus noticed the car was slowing down. They must be getting close. He looked out the window, it was a pretty average looking neighbourhood, but at least no roofs were leaking and he couldn’t see any smashed windows. That was a good sign he wasn’t going to, you know, get robbed or murdered. Although being murdered wouldn’t be the worst thing.
He didn’t respond to anything his caseworker said, he didn’t need to, there were no actual questions in the words. So, technically, he didn’t need to answer. They pulled up outside of an average looking house, but the outside has some nice purple and blue flowers and a family car in the driveway. The car was dent free, too, so hey, there was a less likely chance they got completely wasted, otherwise it probably would have been dented and chipped from some less-than-sober driving.
The sun was beginning to set at this point, and although it looked lovely and picture perfect in the sky, that wasn’t helping him feel any better. His stomach was a mix of anxiety and bitterness, he didn’t want to be here in any shape or form. He was still anxious as hell about this sudden placement, and still bitter and angry at the world for so many things, one of them being making him survive in the first place. He was angry at the world, at the doctors, at the nurses, at his case worker, at these dumb foster parents he hadn’t even met yet. He was mad at his birth parents for everything, mad at all the people who had lied to him, at everyone and everything. Pointless anger, his frustration would do nothing to help him, but he still felt it nonetheless.
He grabbed his bag, not much was in there, just everything he’d hastily shoved in before leaving the hospital. He really needed some new clothes and some other stuff, too. Spending all that time in the hospital had been a nightmare. He huffed, annoyed, to himself, it didn’t do anything, no one else could even hear it, but it made him feel a tiny bit better. He followed the case worker up to the front door, keeping his head down. He didn’t care who they were, really. They’d posture posture posture, and blah blah blah to the caseworker, whatever. Hopefully whoever this other foster kid was, they weren't going to start throwing punches at him and trying to steal his shit. Not that he had much to steal, but he didn’t want anyone going through his stuff nonetheless. Although, knowing his luck, as soon as the case worker was gone the fosters were going to demand to check through his bag.
He saw light flood the pavement he was staring at as the door swung open. The case worker and whoever was standing at the door started talking as soon as the door opened, but Janus wasn’t listening, he was tuning it all out. It wasn’t important anyways, and, now that he’d started staring at the pavement, he’d started to space out as a wave of thoughts flooded his mind.
Why was this pavement so clean? Did they specifically wash their path? Not even a single bird shit stain, that was impressive. Maybe they were crazy clean freaks. Ugh. That would be terrible, Janus wasn’t a messy person by any means, he hated mess, but at the same time he often left things around simply because he forgot he left them there and forgot to put them away. Would they get mad at him if his room wasn’t always clean? What if he had to share with someone and they left it all messy and then he got in trouble for it? That was just bullshit. He would totally try and sell the other person out, but he might get in trouble anyways. Foster parents didn’t care who got punished as long as it didn’t happen again. It probably would, Janus was kind of bad at leaving his things around-- wait, he went over that already--
Another shadow joined the first one standing in the doorway and Janus could hear what sounded like the same word being repeated over and over through the muffled sound of his brain-?
“Janus!” A louder voice, almost shouting into the empty street, suddenly broke through his hazy brain and he jumped, snapping his head up as quickly as physically possible, staring with wide eyes. His caseworker sighed, “Finally. Spacing out again, hm?” He said, not-so-subtle annoyance and mocking in his tone. Janus turned away, feeling his face heat up. He couldn’t help it. He couldn’t stay down to earth if his life depended on it, as stupid as that was. But, sometimes, up in his own head was a much better, more interesting, and much calmer place to be. The real world got too much.
“This is Logan and Virgil, say hello, Janus.” Janus murmured a ‘hello’ under his breath, looking back down at the floor once more, still avoiding eye contact like the plague. “It’s nice to meet you, Janus. Come on in, dinner’s almost ready but we have time for a short tour.” A smooth voice said. He dared a glance up, seeing the face of a man with neat dark brown hair and a pair of black rimmed glasses. Wearing a black button up shirt and dark blue dress pants he had a look that could only be described as some sort of teacher or professor. The other one standing next to him was almost opposite, he had a black hoodie on with purple sleeves, jeans and sneakers, he almost looked like… an emo. He was an emo. Wow. That was new. Emo foster parent…it was definitely interesting.
He looked back down at the floor again, nodding reluctantly. He didn’t really care about a house tour, he’d figure his way around without one, but whatever. They showed him and his case worker, who was doing a last check before leaving, around the house. Starting with the living room with a big, undamaged TV (which surprised Janus a little, they must not have had more than a couple kids at once or any younger kids around at any point, then. Or damaged it themselves in anger), plus a nice, actually comfy looking sofa and an armchair.
Then the kitchen, where something was clearly cooking, so one of the foster parents, the emo looking one, stayed behind to finish up while the professor looking one gave the rest of the tour. The kitchen was nice though, it even had an island, which was one of those weird things that just instantly made a kitchen nicer and fancier. A quick show of the small downstairs bathroom and then they went upstairs, showing the bigger bathroom, and a study.
“And this is me and Virgil’s room. If we're in here and you need us, you can come get us, Janus. Any harmful or upsetting thoughts you may be having at any time, we want to know, we will try our best to help you.” The smart-dressed guy said, turning to him. He turned his face away quickly, still refusing to engage in eye contact. Ah, so if the emo one was Virgil, this must be... Logan, then. That’s what the case worker had said their names were, right? As if he was going to go crying to them like a pathetic baby. He didn’t say anything out loud, however. He’d learned it was best to keep snarky thoughts in his head.
Logan gestured to a room down the hall, “That is Roman’s room. I won’t disturb him right now, but you’ll see him soon at dinner. He can be a bit overwhelming and energetic at times, and a bit easily upset when he doesn’t understand things. But he’s a very friendly and outgoing person, so he may start trying to strike up conversations immediately. If you want your space, we will tell him to give you some.” Logan said. Janus couldn’t help but notice as they walked past that there was a sign on the outside of the door with some doodles drawn on it. He could have sworn the case worker said this Roman kid was the same age as him. Maybe he was just a little childish. Whatever, Janus wasn’t here to judge.
“Dinner’s ready!” A voice called from downstairs. “Ah, i’ll show you your room later.” Logan nodded, seemingly just to himself, “We should go eat.” He added. The case worker turned to Logan, “I’ll be leaving, then,” He then turned to Janus, “I’ll see you later, Janus. Be good.” He said, and Janus resisted the urge to flip him off as he made his way downstairs. Logan followed after him, and Janus realised he was also probably supposed to follow Logan back down. But before he could, he heard a door open behind him and spun around immediately, shoulders tensing up to his ears, defences up on instinct.
“Oh. Hey, uh, you must be the new kid.” A boy who actually did look around his age, maybe a little older (annoyingly enough) was standing in the hallway, looking Janus up and down as he spoke. Ah, well, that must have been Roman, then. Janus couldn’t think of anyone else it could be. He ignored the expected surprised look, eyes wide as if he was some new animal at a zoo. He go it, -trust him he did-, but seriously. He was… different than Janus was expecting. Not that he was sure what he was expecting, really. But this Roman kid looked… normal. He had dark hair with a red tint, probably from fading red hair dye, and greenish-amber eyes, plus he was wearing a bright red Disney hoodie. Guess he liked the colour red. But overall, he was just another random teenager.
“Hey.” Janus muttered. “It’s Janus, right? I’m Roman.” Roman said, a bit awkwardly, causing an awkward silence to fall upon them after he’d spoken. After a minute or so, Janus broke the silence by clearing his throat, “Uh… yeah, Janus. Nice Disney hoodie, dude.” He said, he meant it to be sarcastic, but he didn’t have the energy for the attitude right then, so it came out rather flat. “Why, thank you!” Roman said proudly, putting his hands on his hips and puffing out his chest. Clearly, his intended sarcasm didn’t reach Roman’s ears. Janus rolled his eyes. What a dork.
Still, this was much better than some asshole who looked ready to throw down as soon as they met. As much as he hated to admit it, Janus’ noodle arms weren’t much good in a fight. Roman could still turn out to be an asshole thief who was going to throw him under the bus, sure, but he wasn’t sure Roman had much psychical fight in him either, he only looked a bit stronger than Janus himself, so maybe Janus stood a better chance.
“Are you just going to stand there, orrr? You look weird just standing there with that bag, you know.” Roman quipped. Janus rolled his eyes again, taking off his bag and placing it down on the floor, hoping he wouldn’t get in trouble for leaving it there. “I literally just arrived, you know.” He said back, crossing his arms. Roman gasped, “Really? I had no idea!” Sarcasm dripped from his voice and Janus had to resist the urge to roll his eyes a third time.
“Are you two coming?” Logan called from the bottom of the stairs. “Yep! I smell pasta!” Roman said cheerfully, moving around Janus to get down the stairs. Janus blinked a few times, trying to process what had just happened, before realising he should probably go down, too. He followed after Roman, stopping in the doorway to the kitchen. On the table he could see a dish of pasta with some kind of probably tomato-y sauce had been set down, sprinkled with cheese and a plate of garlic bread beside it. It was all hot and looked good.
“Damn.” He said, not realising he’d spoken out loud. Roman turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow, but it seemed neither Virgil nor Logan had heard him. “What?” Roman asked. Janus turned to him, lowering his voice, just in case, “Do they cook like this every night?” He asked, he’d barely been expecting hot meals, honestly. Roman’s face softened slightly, although Janus wasn’t sure why.
“Yeah. Come on, sit down and eat, you’re skinnier than the stick i found on the ground earlier.” Roman said. “Hey!” Janus huffed, they’d only known each other five minutes and this guy was already insulting him! The audacity. Virgil looked up at them, “Are you two arguing already? I think that’s a record.” He said, but he chuckled as he did so, so Janus wasn’t too worried he was actually mad.
Hesitantly, he sat down at the table, taking an empty seat next to where Roman had just sat. He flinched as a cup of water was placed in front of him. “Geez, dude, you’re a jumpy one, huh?” Roman said, giving him a look. He sighed, he really didn’t have the energy for this right now. “Thanks for the water.” He murmured. Roman seemed to sense he wanted to drop conversation, so he turned to Logan and Virgil instead.
Janus wasn’t really listening to their conversation, honestly, he started zoning out again until Roman passed him the scoop to put some pasta on his plate. Oh, right. He glanced up, Virgil and Logan weren’t looking at him, clearly focused on whatever Roman was saying (Something about his day at school or whatever) so he reached out and put about the same amount as Roman had on his plate. That seemed safe enough. He didn’t take any garlic bread, as much as he wanted to, he hadn’t had that garlic-y goodness in years, but he didn’t want to risk it. He started eating (heck, this food was so much better than the nasty hospital shit), happy to stay silent and out of the dinner conversation, until suddenly, Logan turned his attention over to him.
“So, Janus,” He began, catching Janus off guard, “Is there anything you enjoy doing? Hobbies?” He asked. Janus shrugged, looking back down at his plate as he pushed a piece of pasta around with his fork, “I don’t know. I guess i like reading, but, there’s not much else you can do when you’re stuck in a hospital under suicide watch.” He mumbled, his voice taking a bitter tone. The air in the room suddenly shifted as everyone froze mid-eating. Oh, right, he’d almost forgotten suicide was a common subject to bring up at the dinner table. His bad. “Sorry,” He mumbled, “Guess i kind of got used to that stuff so much i... forgot…” He trailed off, staring down at the tiled floor. It was white. That must be a pain to clean. Huh.
“It’s… there’s no need to apologize, Janus. I can imagine it was rather boring, yes. I also enjoy reading, did you read any particularly good books?” Logan asked, shifting the subject smoothly. As he did so, the tension in the room settled slightly, and everyone went back to eating. There was no point dwelling on that, however, especially since Logan had just asked him a question.
He thought for a moment, forcing himself to look back up again, “Well… i suppose a couple were quite interesting. I read one that was more about morality and philosophy that i wasn’t expecting to enjoy, but it was actually pretty intriguing. I don’t really remember the title, though.” He said, hoping that was enough. He didn’t usually get asked these kinds of questions by adults, not when they wanted an actual answer, anyways. Logan nodded, “I enjoy books like that sometimes as well. I like most kinds of literature.” What a nerd. Again, not that he was going to say that out loud. Still, reading was a much less threatening interest than anything that involved alcohol or weapons.
“You nerds.” Roman teased. Apparently, Roman had no quarrels about saying it out loud. “Roman.” Logan said warningly, narrowing his eyes. Janus stiffened up, but Roman simply sighed and rolled his eyes dramatically, “Yeah, yeah, sorry. Can you pass me the last piece of garlic bread?” He said, waving it off as if he hadn’t just insulted Logan to his face. But, to Janus’ surprise, Logan didn’t get mad. He blinked a few times, watching the man for a moment, waiting for a reaction, but Logan simply went back to his food.
“You can, if you ask nicely.” Virgil said, making a grab for the last piece before Roman could grab it, and holding it in his hand with a smirk. Roman huffed, crossing his arms, but Virgil just continued to give him a smug look until, eventually, Roman gave in. “Fine, could i please have the last piece of garlic bread?” Roman asked, putting emphasis on his ‘please’. Virgil hummed as if in thought, “Only if you properly say sorry to Logan for calling him a nerd.”
“You call him a nerd all the time!” Roman argued. “I say it lovingly.” Virgil remarked. Roman stuck out his tongue in disgust, “Ew. Fine, i’m sorry for calling you a nerd, dad, i didn’t mean it in a bad way.” Roman sighed. Logan gave him a smile, “I know, Roman.” Virgil tossed the garlic bread onto Roman’s plate and he grinned, “Yum, garlic-ly goodness.” He said before biting into it. Virgil and Logan both just laughed, going back to finishing off their own food.
Janus, however, was utterly lost about what he just witnessed. He knew he was staring, looking between the three of them with wide eyes, but he was just completely confused. They just-- First, Roman insulted Logan to his face, then Logan didn’t even get mad about it. And then Roman only apologized when Virgil made him, but then not even Virgil was mad about his attitude, and they just-- they still gave him what he wanted, not even saying no, they just-- they were all completely back to normal, no one was mad or upset or angry-- What on earth just happened?!
He’d never seen a situation like that go down so… so… easily. No consequences, they just smoothed it all out in under a minute! It never just ended so well like that, all fine and dandy as if nothing even happened! He must have been staring for too long, as Virgil looked up at him, “Everything alright, Janus?” He asked. “Oh- uh, yeah, sorry, i was just… uh spacing out again.” He shoved out the first excuse that came to mind. It wasn’t a good one, but hey, it might work. Virgil didn’t look entirely convinced, but he dropped it anyway. Janus internally sighed in relief. Besides, he spaced out often enough for that to be realistic, anyways.
Once they were done, he followed Roman’s direction of putting his dish and cup in the sink, but he wasn’t entirely sure what he was supposed to do after that, waiting around awkwardly by the sink. “Roman, will you show Janus his room when you go back upstairs?” Logan asked, standing up from the kitchen table with his own plate and cup. Roman gave him a flat look, “I think he can figure it out by himself, it’s literally the door right next to mine.” He deadpanned. Logan didn’t even bother looking over at him as replied, “Mhm.”
Roman huffed, turning to leave the kitchen, “He’s difficult like that, refuses to let you fight him sometimes.” Roman muttered as he and Janus walked out into the hallway and back up the stairs. “There, did it.” He said, to no one in particular, pointing to the door next to his before disappearing back into his own room, “Later nerd.” He said before slamming the door behind him. Janus huffed indignantly, he was not a nerd. He pushed the room door open, hoping for at least a semi-comfortable bed. Everything else here seemed nice and comfortable, maybe he’d at least get something a step above rock-solid.
To his surprise the room looked… fairly nice. Compared to what he was used to, it was definitely an upgrade. Plain, sure, but still, he couldn’t complain much. The bed was… a double? Geez, he’d never actually slept on a double bed before. Because, you know, who was going to fucking give him a double bed? The sheets were just plain white, but there was a... dark grey blanket on top, it looked maybe a little soft, but it was strange looking with a square-ish pattern on it. Whatever, a blanket was a blanket, if he was allowed one, he’d take it, he got cold easily. And also… he went over and picked up the soft toy leaning on the pillows (like, actually a whole four pillows, plus an extra, different one) he scowled at it, he wasn’t a kid, he didn’t need a teddy. It was heavier than he expected too, geez, what was inside this thing? It smelt strong, too, of lavender or something. Weird.
The desk had a notebook, some pencils, and a big pack of markers. Geez, those markers must have been expensive, it was a whole range of colours… he tried not to think too hard about that. His eyes caught onto some fidget toys, too. Huh… he was surprised to see those there, to say the least. Most people would tell him to stop fidgeting, stop moving, stop tapping his foot, etc. He picked one up, a popper one, and started popping the bubbles. He glanced back at the pencils and notebook and did a double take when he realised there was an eraser, it was a full set of pencils and supplies… but there was no sharpener.
And there it was. Of course, they weren’t going to give him a pencil sharpener. Anyone could get the blade out of that easily. He threw the cat plush back onto the bed in frustration, wincing when it hit the wall harder than he expected, making a loud slamming sound. He waited for a moment, sucking in his breath to stay silent, but… no one came. He breathed out slowly. He was fine.
It wasn’t surprising, really, and he wondered what else they’d removed and what they wouldn’t let him have. He didn’t plan on trying to do anything right now, anyways. He honestly didn’t have the energy for it, and he definitely didn’t want to land himself in the hospital again.
He heard a knock on his door and jumped, he supposed someone had heard him after all. He didn’t hear anyone coming upstairs though, so…? Still, he hunched his shoulders tensely as he opened the door, but luckily saw only Roman standing there. Roman raised an eyebrow at him, “Are you throwing stuff at the wall? If you start making slamming noises like that Virgil and Logan are gonna panic, you know.” Suddenly a twinge of guilt hit him, right… “Sorry, i didn’t mean for it to hit the wall.” He mumbled.
Roman raised his brow even further, but ultimately dropped it, “Alright, if you’re sure. Just be careful.” He said, before waving it off and leaving back to his own room again. Janus breathed out as he closed the door behind him. Alright, so he needed to be more quiet, clearly.
He glanced around the room once more, spotting a few books on the bookshelf. If they were there, that probably meant he was allowed to read them, right? Maybe they had something good to read. He was sure they’d removed any books with any blood or dark themes ‘so that it wouldn’t trigger him’ but maybe there was still something. He shouldn’t complain, really. It was better for them to care than not give a shit, he supposed. He was just pissed off and frustrated, and was taking it out on anything and everything he could. He needed to calm down, but that was one thing he’d never been good at. Anger issues were always a fun one to try and handle. Especially when you’re trying to not let people know you even have anger issues.
He ran a hand through his hair and breathed out, distraction, he needed a distraction. He scanned the bookshelf, it was mostly fantasy stuff, it probably used to belong to Roman, he seemed like the type to like fantasy. Not that Janus knew anything about him, really, but just his overall demeanor and, you know, his Disney hoodie. He wasn’t against fantasy, but they had to be really good to interest him. He picked one out at random, if he liked it, he liked it, if he didn’t, he didn’t. It didn’t really matter either way. Maybe if he picked up an extra chore for Roman or something the other would let him borrow another book.
He eyed the bed for a moment, for some unknown, stupid reason, he was almost kind of… scared to sit on it. It just… it looked comfy. Too comfy. He looked over at the desk chair. It still looked comfier than a plain old desk chair should, but it was better. He pulled it away from the desk and sat down, sighing to himself as he flipped open the book. It was pretty good, actually, and he found himself getting sucked into it enough for him to lose track of time passing by. After what felt like a mere ten minutes, there was another knock on his door, he huffed, thinking Roman had come back for some reason, but as he glanced at the clock that was also placed on the desk he could see it was now over half an hour later.
“Janus?” Shit. That definitely wasn’t Roman, it sounded like maybe Virgil, he had the deepest voice out of all of them. Was he in trouble for something already? He put the book down and pulled himself out of the chair, -how had he ended up in such a weird position again-? He went over to the door and quickly pulled it open before Virgil got mad at him for ignoring him. He was surprised the other even bothered knocking. Good food for dinner every night (supposedly) and knocking on doors before entering? Geez, this was really the equivalent of a five star place for a foster home.
Virgil gave a small smile as he answered the door, “Hey, i was just wondering if you wanted to come downstairs and join us in watching something? Not sure what, maybe a movie or just a few episodes of a show.” Janus raised an eyebrow, what kind of foster parents actually wanted to spend time with their foster kid? Unless… he crossed his arms across his chest, raising an eyebrow, “Do i have to?” He asked, not grumpily, but with more of a questioning tone.
Virgil’s eyes widened slightly, he clearly hadn’t been expecting that answer. “Well, uhm…” He started, but trailed off, seeming unsure of what to say. Janus sighed, trying not to sound too annoyed, “Alright, fine, i get it. Can’t let me sit by myself for too long, otherwise i might try to jump out the window.” He flicked his wrist in the air, resisting the urge to roll his eyes (Again. His current record was ten times in one day). Although he’d already checked. The window was locked. Not a key to be found anywhere. Virgil frowned and Janus froze on the spot, right, probably shouldn’t be pissing off the newbies on the first night. “Sorry.” He mumbled, stepping out and closing the bedroom door behind him.
Virgil looked like he wanted to say more but stayed silent as they made their way downstairs, Janus following behind Virgil. He led them into the living room, where Logan was sitting on the couch, his head in a book. Virgil chuckled lightly, “Are you going to put the book down and join us dear, or are you staying in book-town?” He said, but not in a mocking way, almost the opposite actually, as he went over and pressed a kiss to Logan’s forehead. Janus silently stuck his tongue out in disgust behind them. Gross.
“Mm, that depends on what you’re watching.” Logan replied, placing his book down on the arm of the couch. Virgil hummed, sitting down beside him, “I don’t know. Anything you want to watch, Janus?” Janus jumped slightly at being suddenly addressed, his brain scrambling to find an answer, but he didn’t have one. After a moment of painfully awkward silence he simply shrugged, “Uh, i don’t know.” He muttered, unhelpful as ever.
Virgil didn’t seem bothered by his indecision, however, humming in thought once more as he grabbed the remote. “How about we just watch a couple episodes of something lighthearted?” He said. Janus cautiously took a seat on the very end of the other side of the couch, unsure of what was even happening. If he had to be down here so they could watch over him, he would have thought that… well, that they wouldn’t just be sitting and watching TV.
Logan looked up at him, “Are you alright, Janus? You look like something is on your mind.” He flinched, for no particular reason, he was just surprised at being addressed directly… again. Most foster parents only acknowledged a foster kid’s existence when they needed them to do something. He shrugged, subconsciously going to mess around with his hoodie strings as he avoided that dreaded direct eye contact, the floor was clearly much more interesting to look at anyways.
“Alright then. Is there anything in particular you’d like to watch?” Janus shook his head, it wasn’t like he’d know anyway. He could already see that they were using a streaming service and he had no idea about the stuff on there, the only thing he’d seen in years was random old crap on actual TV and a few cartoons from when he’d been around little kids. Virgil glanced over at him, “No? Alrighty, i’ll just put whatever on, we don’t really need to be paying full attention. It’s getting a little late, anyways.”
He couldn’t bring himself to sit down properly, even though Logan and Virgil had given him plenty of space to sit (surprisingly enough). It just felt… off. But that went out of the window as he ended up spacing into the show Virgil put on and sliding down to sit on the couch properly without even thinking about it. He only realised when the episode ended and another came on, making him jump. But as he quickly glanced over at Virgil and Logan, they… didn’t even seem to have noticed. He curled up, hugging his knees to his chest as he let out a breath he didn’t even realise he’d been holding. This house was going to be a weird one.