Chapter Text
Eddy didn’t know when it all started, but he was sure that it was quite recently when he acknowledges these feelings. That’s right, he’s got a crush on his own best friend. He remembered being in a state of panic when Brett had to go to the hospital due to his health condition. He got worried and subsequently got angry at himself for being a failure. Had he been more observant in the first place, Brett wouldn’t have gone through all that. From that day on, he started to care more for Brett, started being more attentive towards his health, and…the spark came as part of the package. He started being more observant of his best friend. The way he talks, the way he laughs, the way he eats, the way he plays his violin, basically the way he functions. The normal mundane things are seemingly turning attractive to Eddy’s point of view.
~
“Hey bro, we’ve got to continue filming the next part for this video,”
“What’s it gonna be, hey?” Brett scooted closer to Eddy on the sofa to look at the laptop screen.
Eddy twitches a little at the sudden proximity between them. Since he’s more conscious of his desire for his best friend, every little touch makes him feel skittish. And for some odd reasons, Brett has been somewhat clingier since they came back from Singapore. He isn’t sure why, but he didn’t want to ask Brett about it either. A little side-track, Brett did smell good though. Like some mixed berries scent thing and Eddy found it weird since Brett doesn’t normally smell THIS good. Now he wonders if his senses could be extra sensitive while being captivated.
Fuck, why the hell is he suddenly like this? No, why am I like this?
Good question. Why? It isn’t something new because it’s just him leaning closer, but Eddy’s brain is screaming in different levels of octave. Eddy clears his throat and sacrifices his comfort to make the elder lean comfortably.
“Since we’re done filming the music part, we gotta film ourselves at a café drinking coffee,” Eddy answered as normally as possible.
Brett hums in response and rests his head on Eddy’s shoulders. Eddy swears to Ling Ling that his heart is going at prestissimo. This is a little too much for Eddy to handle, but he can’t shrug Brett’s head off because that’s just plain rude. He could feel his shoulder stiffen and getting more uncomfortable to bear. This isn’t something new though. Brett would occasionally rest his head on Eddy’s shoulder since they are that comfortable with one another. It’s just that this time, the fellow feeling feels more nerve-racking to Eddy now. To put it simply, everything is normal and the only thing that isn’t normal is Eddy.
“Alright. When do you want to go?” Brett broke the silence while looking at his phone and giggling at some viola jokes on his Instagram feed.
“Anytime when you’re free.” Eddy replied almost calmly, not forgetting that his heart is due to explode anytime and his stomach’s doing some sort of an acrobatics move which is not helping him at all. All them butterflies in his stomach are going to come out as puke at this rate.
“How about tomorrow? I’d say now, but the setting may not be suitable for a café date since the day’s turned dusk.” Brett mumbled as his focus remains fixed on his screen in front of him.
That is all it takes for Eddy to explode internally. Brett may have maffled the whole reply, but Eddy, having highly sensitive ears, heard that clearly.
D-Date? Me and Brett? Date?? Did I hear that right? No? Yes, I did.
Eddy flushed while having that mental conversation with himsef. Again, this isn’t new also because it’s not like they never went out on a date as FRIENDS before. There was never a time which they were not together. They ate out at their favourite restaurant togther, drank bubble tea on a random street together, shopped at the usual mall together, so what seems to be the problem? It’s a normal everyday thing and yet, it feels as though like it’s going to be a virgin experience. While Eddy’s in his own pink cloud, he hasn’t noticed that he had stayed awfully quiet for quite some time that is not hard to realise by the elder one.
Brett lifts his head to look at Eddy. “So, yes?”
Eddy snaps out and looks at Brett, and realises with embarrassment that he was blushing, which only made him blush even more.
“A-Ah! Yeah. Sure! Tomorrow!” Eddy stammered before slamming his laptop screen down at the same time which startled Brett.
“I’m going to the toilet first!” Eddy rushed off to the direction of the toilet and slammed the door.
Eddy finds himself unable to calm the shit out of his heart. He doesn’t understand the feelings he has. The last time he felt this way was when he was still chasing after a girl. It almost feels like déjà vu. You only feel this way if you happen to like that person romantically and so if he feels this way, doesn’t it mean that he likes Brett? Like in that way?
… Nah! That’s impossible. Brett’s a guy!
Eddy looks up at himself in the mirror. He notices that his cheeks are scarlet red, and the heat starts creeping up to his ears too which looks impossible to go unnoticed. No way in hell he’s going out now, not when he looks like a Pikachu.
He washes his face to cool off while mentally cursing and brutally denying himself. He thought he could brush it off as infatuation eventually, but it doesn’t seem like it is anymore. They have been in this platonic relationship for the longest time, but somehow, Eddy craves for something more than this. He doesn’t want to stay like this, he wants more from this relationship. He cursed at himself for being greedy but is it all because of the sexual deprivation he is currently facing? Maybe. Or he could just be accidentally in love with his best friend-cum-business partner. And that’s bad news for him because Brett’s not someone who can take it lightly if his own best friend likes him romantically. And then what’s going to happen to the friendship they have forged for years?
I hate this. I hate myself.
~
Brett looks at Eddy’s back as he darted for the toilet. All sorts of things are going through Brett’s mind now because Eddy never does that out of the blue unless he did something that made Eddy uncomfortable. Was it because of the new mixed berries scent that he used? That couldn’t be it, right? After all, Eddy likes sweet-smelling things and he chose this scent because Eddy said it was nice.
Or it could just be a tummy ache. He chooses to believe the second option because no point overthinking about it. He knows that Eddy’s stomach can get too sensitive sometimes, so it’s plausible. He slumps back on the sofa, resting his warm cheek on one of his hand. Recently, like a few months ago, he found out that he likes Eddy. Not that kind of like, but it’s that kind of like. He isn’t 100% sure but having jitteriness and sweaty palms whenever Eddy’s with him are enough to conclude it. Ever since the day his body broke down when they were in Singapore, Eddy has been more attentive to him. Almost like what any overprotective boyfriend would do. All the nagging, all the excessive soft touches whenever Eddy tucks him into bed, Eddy bringing food to his bed, and importantly, the way Eddy cups his hand on Brett’s cheek to check for fever occasionally. The thought of it makes his head go poof. So embarrassing. He really wishes to be sick again to experience all that again even if it means being selfish.
Brett’s mind begins to look back to those few weeks when he was feeling like death. He couldn’t forget how Eddy went pale and stood there like a rock while he was trying to survive through the ordeal. He knows that Eddy was trying his best to hold it together but internally feared for the worst to happen. After all, it was Eddy’s first time in 20 something years seeing Brett that way. Maybe he should take back what he wished for. It was bad.
~