Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was never supposed to end this way. You and Sans were never really in love. So why were you crying? Fat tears ran down your cheeks as you felt them quickly pour out and drench your face. Soft little sobbing noises ripped themselves from your mouth no matter how hard you tried to stop them.

You were so weak. You should have never gotten close to him! Should have never thought he was different! Should have ignored all the fuzzy feelings you got when he held your hand in his own boney fingers. Circled your back in a way to comfort you when you were down. The way his sockets lidded as you both lustfully stared at each other before starting your first sloppy make out season in a random bar. The way he comforted you. A shoulder you always leaned on. He was always there for you and Paps. More tears streamed down your face as you recalled all the happiness you felt with him. All the comfort. You hiccuped out loudly before pressing your back harder onto the bathroom door. You were home alone but the thought of anyone catching you crying over Sans filled you to the brim with self hate. You knew better. You fucking knew better!

It's just friends with benefits. It was always just that. Even when you thought differently. The cuddles on the couch, the way you both shared a drink, holding hands outside the movie theater. The way Papyrus handed you a handmade dating rulebook made by him to help you with Sans. You must have misunderstood because everything was fine half an hour ago when you asked Sans if he wanted to hang out. But he didn't answer so you went to his room. You were roommates after all. You didn't expect to walk in on him and another person. The door wide open. Full on display.

"Y-Y/N?! It's not what it looks like!" Sans said while he scrambled off the bed, his eyes switching between you and your new roommate Poppy.

You felt your eyes start to be glazed over by a sheet of tears. Your mind kept repeating the same phrase over and over.

'Friends with benefits friends with Benefits, friends with benefits'

"It's fine…" you croaked out, you were on the verge of breaking down.

Sans had a blanket wrapped around his waist, it pooled at the floor in ripples, he started talking but you didn't listen, you focused your brain on carefully counting the folds on the cream colored sheet to distract yourself. Poppy was snickering a bit but neither of you noticed.

"So ya- ya understand right kid! It's not like- look it's- we're cool right?" He asked in a worried tone, that snapped you out of your trance. Blue sweet dropped down his forehead.

Your tears started falling more than ever before, your heart with a stabbing aching.

"It's cool. We're just friends with benefits after all" you whispered out.

He flinched at that. You saw him flinch, you didn't care though. You slowly shut the door behind you. You were cool. It was fine. Sure you were crying. Sure you were screaming on the inside. Your hands twitched to bash anything and everything that crossed your path. You were fine. You rushed over to your door before slamming it open and closing it. You jumped onto your bed and hid your face in the mattress deeply inhaling it as a way to calm yourself. Even if you got snot all over it. Gross. You weakly chuckled at your inner thoughts. You just got your fucking heartbroken and you worried about snot on your bed? Wow. Did you even love Sans that much? Or was it the betrayal that hurt so much?

You didn't know. You just needed sleep.

---

The next few weeks were awkward to say the least. The first couple days you avoided Sans. You always hung out with Papyrus or someone else. But even Papyrus started to distance himself. You didn't want to coddle him so you left it alone but you tried your best to talk to him when you could and you could tell he was grateful. You assumed college was stressful for him.

Sans..didn't try talking to you. But you can't count the amount of time you've come home to San's name being screamed in pleasure from upstairs. He was always good in bed. Thank the stars Papyrus stayed out late. Sans was always so great to you and Paps...But it didn't matter now. You slowly made your way up to your room, that was a couple ones away from San's. Fucking perfect. But it was your safe spot. You could always just put earbuds on. And you did. You could hear him and poppy together but you ignored it. It's fine. You and Sans were never in love. You were good. Just focus on work and school.

Ever since you stopped avoiding Sans. He started to avoid you. He looked tired, he looked...guilty whenever he saw you. You knew why. You didn't say anything. You just offered him a cup of coffee the way he liked it. And he took it with a tired smile. Both of you went into a routine of not talking about what happened. You were just friends now. Friends without benefits.
Sans became….more distracted. He always spent his days with Poppy. Always clinging to them. Always going on dates with them. Forgetting promises he used to make. Ignoring you and Papyrus.

It hurt. It hurt alot. And one night Papyrus found you like that. You were on the couch. Slumped over in a pile of blankets watching old MTT Runs eating a bowl of chips. Crying. Close to sobbing. You just have looked so gross with your snob and gross chip fingers. Papyrus didn't look any better. In fact he looked depressed. You remember him coming home. In a hoodie of all things! He was in a red zip up cool guy hoodie, blue jeans with his favourite red boots and a pink glitter MTT Bennie. You opened up your blanket and he swooped under them with you patting your head. The words he said next tore you apart.

"I know it hurts. I miss him too" he whispered.

You cried so hard that night. And Papyrus just held onto you cooing praises. You both passed out on the couch tangled in each other's arms.

--
The next morning you made Papyrus oatmeal and pancakes. To your surprise. The usually energetic skeleton was in some red sweatpants, MTT glitter slippers and a black t-shirt with a pasta dish on it.

Sans wasn't home.

You both sat on the large kitchen table. You had toast in one hand and coffee in the other. Papyrus groggily ate his pancakes mumbling a thank you. You nodded and rubbed your slightly puffy eyes.

After a couple seconds you decided to finally talk.

"Are you ok Pap?" You asked.

Papyrus looked up at you then back at his pancakes before cutting off another piece.

"I should be asking you that," he replied.

You didn't like it when he used a normal voice. It was so unlike him. Made you feel uneasy.

"Paps you know you can talk to me right? After what you did last night. I think you need to stop supporting people and talk about your own problems" you told him.

Papyrus let out a tired sigh before looking up at you. He looked like himself but he was obviously conflicted and hurt. Tired and depressed. You hated seeing him like this. He was usually so positive. Was it college? Was it humans harassing him? What was bringing down your Papaya???
He stuffed another price of pancake in his mouth before setting down the fork with a faint clack.

"Metta…. Mettaton broke up with me" he told you, orange tears started streaming down his face.

You quickly got up and sat next to him giving him a hug despite his large height. You patted his head and he nuzzles your neck while crying. He was blubbering out his problems.

"H-he said he needed to focus on his f-fame and I-i understood that...but then Sans wasn't a-around to comfort me and I just!-" he broke into another sob.

You rubbed his back trying to comfort him. Your hands carefully scratched the back of the spine under his skull like you did with Sans when he had a Nightmare. Papyrus let out a soft hum before his crying turned into a puur. You squint your eyes questioning if what you were hearing was right but decided to ignore it and focus on making Papyrus feeling better. His sobs started to end and you assumed you made him feel better for now. But then he started to firmly grab your waist making you hitch your breath. Was...was... Papyrus smelling you?

"P-pap?" You ask.

He didn't reply. He just pressed his nasal cavity to your neck and puured louder. You felt somthing nick at your neck?

What the fuck?????.

Chapter Text

Oh no, did you break him? Fuck. Sans was going to kill you. Suddenly your whole body was lifted, you started flailing around until you realized that Papyrus was carrying you bridal style. You look up at him with wide eyes as he proceeded to nonchalantly carry you two into the living room couch. How was he so strong??? You look back as he starts walking closer to the couch. You can see both your unfinished breakfasts just sitting there.

"U-um Paps…???" You ask again.

He looks down at you and smiled and you just sorta let him carry you. He lets out a happy puur sound. Your so confused. You feel him shuffle before sitting on the couch. Then.

He puts you on his lap?

You're literally sitting on his lap. And he put you there. You try to get up but he firmly touches your thigh, singling you with a shake of his head to stay. Alright then. You guess your staying here then. He pets your head. You blink and look up at him. He smiled again. This time with his mouth slightly open and you notice his fangs in the dim morning light.

He has fangs..are you in a dream??? You don't remember Sans or Papyrus ever having fangs. He lowers his head to your level before smiling even wider showing off his fangs. They look longer than before???

"Huh????" You ask dumbfounded. .

Papyrus frowns a bit before letting out a loud huff.

"I'm trying to court you. Can't you see me showing you my fangs???" Papyrus asked with a worried expression.

You kinda just sat there for a couple seconds. Not registering what he just said. Court you? Like in. Court or try to find a mate like the birds on those nature shows???? What.

"C-court? Like date????" You ask him.

Fuck your panicking. Then he nods. You feel your stomach twist into nots, your
heart beating harshly on your chest. This was Papyrus! Your sweet happy cinnamon roll of a boy! You could never date him. Sure he wasn't a minor, no stripes were enough to clarify that. Sure he dated Mettaton but you knew that their dates were just going to a restaurant and doing fashion runways. Yea he was handsome and you wanted to do certain things with him but those thoughts left your mind when you got to know him. You felt yourself start to sweat.

"Pa-paps….I just cant- your- I...it's complicated. Besides I don't think we're suited for each other...you just got out of a breakup" you tried to let him down easy.

Papyrus looked down at you with a deeper frown that ever before. You could see he was hurt by the rejection but you and Papyrus were both hurt. Clinging onto each other. This wasn't healthy. You knew that.

"Human" he softly whispered, you looked up to him, his large phalanges curved the side of your face making you look into his eyes.

You felt your breath stop for a moment. You were going to open your mouth but he beat you too it.

"I know the both of us are...not in good places right now. And I understand that. As crude as it might sound. I wish for us to be rebounds stopping each other from going back to the ones who hurt us" He explained, his face inched closer to yours.

You looked back at him with wide eyes. Your mind going a mile a second at what he just said. He wanted to be rebounds. Papyrus knew what rebounds were and he was asking you to be his. And for you to his. His face slowly inches closer, you felt a blush come up. You couldn't do this! Sure Sans broke your heart but this was too much. Papyrus didn't know what he was talking about!

"Papyrus! No!" You pleaded. He stopped looking down at you, transparent orange tears ready to spill.

"You...I'm not worth a rebound for you. Besides Papyrus...were not matched to be together. Trust me" you told him.

You saw his brow bones narrow down. He looked pissed. The grip on your thigh became tighter causing you let out a sqeak. You weren't scared if him hurting you but you wouldn't lie that this whole situation was making you nervous.

"Pa-"

"No enough!" He cut you off, you shut your mouth.

"I'm not a fucking child! Stop telling me you don't want to be with me and sugar coating it! I'm so sick of everyone treating me like I'm some idiot who doesn't know anything!" He yelled out.

You felt his hands travel down your to your waist before he pushed you down onto the couch. His arms trapping you beneath him. You stared at him shocked. A growl escaped from his mouth, both his sockets lighting a bright orange.

"I see...the way Sans treats you...my brother is complicated but even I could understand that you deserved better…" he croaked out.

You laid under him. Your own frown seeping into your face as you hugged him, be fell ontop of you.

"Your not a kid Papyrus..it's just your so...pure..I just don't want to take advantage of you" you confessed.

You heard him scoff as he wrapped his own arms under your back.

"I'm not a child. I'm 32 for stars sake. Sans just never lets me act like I'm an adult. Always thinking I'm a idiot makes him leave me alone" he mumbled.

32? Papyrus...was 32!?!! You thought he was 19! Holy shit. Sans said he was twice or 3 times Paps age! You were fucking a 64 almost going on 74 okyear old!?!? You thought Sans was like 30 max! You let out a loud wheeze. Papyrus shot up asking if you were alright but you burst out chuckling.

"Holy shit! Paps iv been fuckin a 70 year old!" You coughed out before slamming your hand on your mouth.

Shit. You can't believe you said that to Papyrus. You just confessed you were fucking his bro! You looked up at him with a worried expression. You have never in your life seen Papyrus look so annoyed. Then again you had never heard him curse.

" paps…?" You asked.

"I would be much better in bed" he told you crossing him arms and looking away.

If you had been drinking or eating anything you would have choked from hearing that . alone. Did Papyrus really just say that??? Ugh but he was 32. Going on 40. Sure he acted like a kid but he was proving right now that he was an adult. Still...should you really rebound with him. I mean. Can't you just stop each other from going back as freinds?

"Can't we just stop each other from going back to our exes as freinds?" You asked.

Papyrus looked like he thought of it for a second before shaking his head.

"As a freind I can support you but I cannot force you not go back to him, such the same with you" he passed, taking your hand in his as a single of comfort.

He looked away for a second before huffing out a sigh.

"As...date mates we have says. We don't have to do...such things yet but. I will be honest. I have grown frustrated with how my brother treats you. So...even for a while…" he paused again, the grip on your hand becoming firmer, a faint orange blush came over his cheek bones.

"Will you be my date mate...even for a little while?" He asked.

You held his hand back. Papyrus was... moving a bit more forward that you knew what to do with. But as a date mate...you knew that Papyrus could help you get over Sans. You weren't sure you could the same for him about Mettaton but you'd try to cheer him up. Just for a bit. You could always end it. You both were agreeing it was just a rebound to help you out. Nothing more nothing less.

"Ok" you told him.

----

After confirming you would date Papyrus you were surprised to find out he was taking this extremely slow. It had been 2 weeks and all you've done is cuddle and comfort each other when things went worng. You two had set a dinner date tonight. Papyrus insisted he would cook. Sans hasn't been around that often. You see him coming around the house more and more, he's been hanging around even for a bit. But you can still see the way the guilt eats at him whenever you see him. Poppy is around too. They mostly stick to Sans. Go shopping with him. Eat out. You knew Sans had the money so you weren't really worried. Besides. The moments were he didn't notice you. He looked happy with Poppy. It hurt. It hurt alot.

As time passed you also started to talk to Papyrus about going to therapy. You had an appointment for him in about a week. You also convinced him to throw out all the MTT brand stuff he had since it always made him so upset. You wanted Papyrus to go to therapy so he would finally feel confident enough to be himself. You learned alot about Papyrus these days. One thing was he did like hoodies. He just never wore them because he knew Sans would call him lazy. He loved math. He wasn't good at it but he loved it. His favorite color was green. He said it was because kindness was somthing he always looked for. Also. He liked puns. Papyrus liked puns! He just pretended to hate them because Sans said too many! One fact that did make you blush was that under that sweet picture he painted of himself Paps was a huge perv. You caught him staring at your ass more than once. He always mumbled about how good you looked. And even made a pasta pick up line about how wet and slippery you could be under his heat. It was once but it's stuck in your head forever.

And Papyrus found out more about you. The dumb things you hid from Sans. The ones you didn't show off because it might turn him off on the idea of dating you. Like how you thought old books smelled good. the way you took your coffee with oat milk instead of creamer. Or even the fact you like barbeque sauce over ketchup for your fries. And Papyrus didn't care. You both stopped each other from going to the other multiple times.

---

So now it was Dinner time. You both sat across from each other. A streaming plate of soup in front of you.

"I thought we were having pasta?" You asked.

Papyrus simply smiled.

"I wanted to try something different. Sans isn't around so it he won't be suspicious of me…" you saw him frown. He was missing Sans. /p>

You ate some soup letting out a pleased hum.

"Well...when you can get to that therapist I told you about then maybe he can try this amazing soup you made" you told him.

He tensed up a bit at that. He didn't have problom going to therapy but you could tell that it was hard for him. He was always hiding himself away from everyone trying to be a beacon of hope as the underground Mascot. Trying to be happy for Sans when his depression got too bad. You love Sans and Papyrus but...you doing want Papyrus to keep pretending he's someone he's not for Sans.

You both ate your soup in comfort then snuggled in the couch watching a show about old dolls being repaired. Papyrus seemed to like it. When the credits rolled around you planted a soft peck on his cheek. Papyrus blushed a bright orange almost combating the living room TVs screen.

"Y/N...can I kiss you...on the mouth?" He nervously asked.

You didn't say anything. He stared at you with a worried expression probably fearing he made you uncomfortable. But if he wanted a kiss that he deserved it. He was already going to therapy for you.

"Sure pap you deserve it after all" You told him.

You both leaned back onto the couch cushion, Papyrus's teeth clicked with your mouth and a fuzzy warm Skeleton kiss pressed into your lips. You kissed him back softy. Both your hands tangling up in each other's. One boney hand on your back and the other on your waist lifting you up. Your neck looking up to reach him. The soft cotton of his sweatshirt pressed up on your chest as he held you close during your mildly intense make out. You both felt like you needed this. You both wanted this. You wanted this. You loved the comfort you gave each other. How supporting you both tried to be for one another. Papyrus was such a sweet caring amazing monster who not alot of people knew of. Your kiss was broken off by the sound of glass shattering. You both whipped your head around only to be greeted by Sans.

"What...the hell. Is. Happening. Here?" He asked.

Chapter Text

You looked between the two brothers in dreadful realization about what just happened. Sans caught you. You were fucked.

You looked over at Papyrus with wide eyes and he looked back at you with almost bulging eyes. You would have found it funny if you weren't scared shitless of his bro at the moment.

"I asked. What the fuck is goin on!" The shorter skeleton demanded, his slippered feet walking right into the broken glass making it break more under his pressure.

You tried to protect Papyrus, which was more like you shrunk under his large ribcage while he trapped you in like a box trying to protect you but you held on tightly ready to take any attack from Sans. You knew this was too good to be true! It was just a stupid rebound! Why did you have to catch feelings for Papyrus and get closer to him...fuck you loved him though. Sweet.. accepting Papyrus. Fuck. You didn't want to put a wedge between these two. You would take the blame. Were you just some slut... constantly moving between brothers. You loved Sans and you moved on to Papyrus so fast... did you even deserve to be with Paps? He was sweet, kind and such an amazing person when he didn't have to hide who was. You... should take the blame. Sans still thought that Paps was like a kid...in his eyes you just fucking tricked Papyrus. Sweet naive Paps.

You'll take the blame to not ruin these brothers.

"Sans i-" but before you could continue you were cut off.

"Brother! I can explain! I fell on the human! A-and that's all that happened!" Papyrus blurted out with a tense smile.

Sans looked between the two of you. One socked blaring up in a blue and yellow the other left as a void. He kept switching between upset and pissed off. He was shaking with rage.

"Y-you're lying to m-me!?" Sans was yelling now, tears running down his cheeks, you felt Papyrus flinch.

Papyrus looked away from him, wrapping his arms around you. He was trembling clearly afraid of his brother who clearly looked unstable. You knew Sans. He got so moody and aggressive when you tried to help him. No wonder Paps...had to hide himself from his brother. Maybe it was because you were looking through rose colored glasses when you were with Sans. Maybe it was dumb love... but right now you honestly didn't understand why Sans was acting like this. It can't think Papyrus was that childish right? He's with Poppy. Why is he acting this way!? You know why. It's because he thinks you tricked Paps. Fuck. You were in a web you couldn't untangle without exposing Papyrus.

"I think….you should leave brother... please" Papyrus didn't look at him while he said that, his voice dropped down into a normal volume that he didn't use around anyone but you.

The tension you felt snapped in half. You looked up at Papyrus and he stared back at you with wide sockets.

Neither of you were expecting that.

"....."

"...."

"It's…" Sans started.

"Them isn't it?" San's dark sockets flickered on and off, his smile turned into a frown.

"Oh no…" you heard Papyrus mumble.

"SANS DON'T! DO I-" .

That's all you heard before exploding pain expanded across your whole body. You couldn't hear anything. It hurt and it was burning. It was so hot but the heat only helped for a second before the exploding pain recurved back even harsher than before.

All your head was ringing as your vision went from red to black.

------ Papyrus pov

"SANS DON'T DO IT!" he cried out while trying to protect you.

But it was too late. You were screaming. It was a gut wrenching screech that racked the walls. A bone attack had went right through your cheek and another punctured your forehead while the last one hit you right on the lungs. Orange tears fell down his face as he shook you slightly trying to make you hear him. God there was so much blood. A huge amount of blood was staining the couch.

"Y/N! YN!!" he begged out, hugging you tightly before carrying you.

You needed a hospital. And you needed one fast! Papyrus tried to get across the door but Sans stood in his way. Then suddenly pounding on the door!

"Is everything ok!? We heard someone scream!!?" Someone yelled.

Sans looked panicked. Papyrus rushed to the kitchen and tried to shove monster food in your mouth but you wouldn't chew! He started casting green magic.

"Yea! J-just a horror movie!" The shorter brother told them with sweat running down his forehead, mummers on the other side started.

Papyrus stilled for a second looking at Sans with disbelief. Your shallow breathing would only keep up for so much longer. His magic even less.

Should he lie? Save his brother. Sans...was.going to let you DIE. Papyrus's breathing grew rapidly. No! You can't die! Please He loves you! You don't deserve to-

The younger brother sucked in a breath.

"CALL 911 A HUMAN IS DYING!!!" He screamed out.

Quickly both of them heard someone dial the number and Papyrus moved closer to the door. He needed to get you out and fast.

"Sans move out the way!"

"Paps what are doin!? I'm your Brother!!" Sans yelled back desperately.

"sans MOVE OR I'LL HAVE TO FORCIBLY MOVE YOU!" Papyrus screamed out.

He looked down at you spitting up blood.

Sans wouldn't budge.

"Why them!? Why not me!? I'm your brother! I've always been there for you!"

Papyrus let out another sob.

"SANS PLEASE THEIR GOING TO DIE!" He sobbed out.

Sans eyes flickered to the blood then to your sleeping body and finally to Papyrus. Nearby ambulances could be heard.

But... sans didn't move.

Papyrus had no choice. He grabbed Sans's soul with blue magic, stopping the healing by throwing him into the bloody couch before making a run towards the front of the building to meet up with the paramedics. Sans tried to stop him but it was too late...and his brother knew better than to go outside covered in blood.

He watched over you as you were rushed to the hospital and he cried when you were put in a medically induced coma.

---- 1 year latar___

Sans was caught but let go shortly after. After what happened, Papyrus confessed to everything that his brother did. The fight. The attacks. When police and the guard found him he was gone, so was his gold and some clothes from his room. Soon he was caught and put on trial but let go for being the judge. Public outrage was huge. Paps...bought his own house and moved away, Papyrus couldn't even leave the house or face the monsters without it ending.

It's been a Year. Papyrus went to therapy and expanded from hiding himself from his brother..who was no longer around to talking about the experience that happened. After Sans was let go of course he desperately tried to talk to Papyrus even stalking him.

It was about 5 months after Sans had been let go that he met his brother again. Papyrus was in the back garden of his new house watering plants he had taken up as a hobby...it was less lonely like that for the tall Skeleton. By this time Papyrus had time to think about who he was. He liked horror movies and cars and making tiny figures out of clay. He liked coffee and pineapple desserts. It was all going fine as things calmed down.

"...paps"

Papyrus almost dropped his watering can, making water splash on his pajama pants. He turned his head seeing his brother there. Looking haggard and dirty, a metal collar on his neck secured as the shorter skeleton climbed out of his bushes.

"Get out" was all papyrus sneered out.

Sans looked taken back before he composed himself looking over Papyrus's body.

"Wow bro your wearing hoods now? Didn't take you as the lazy typ-"

" Shut the fuck up and get out"

"..." Sweat dripped down Sans head, his smile turned into a grimace.

"P-pap you don't swea-" he started

"I don't do a lot of things Sans but things have changed...leave. now." This was the last warning Papyrus was giving him.

Of course he didn't try to leave, he grabbed onto the others leg begging and thrashing.

"Paps please I'm your brother!" Sans desperately yelled out.

Papyrus looked away, tears glazing his eyes before sending a text to Asgore.

"I'm sorry Sans but I can't not after what you did. It crossed the line"

Sans shot up looking at his younger brother who refused to meet his gaze.

"Pap I have always been there for you! I have done everything for you! And offered everything I could do for you and you're treating me like This!? Them over me!?" Sans was rattling his bones trying to use his magic but the collar stopped him.

Papyrus narrowed his brows trying to ignore everything his brother was saying but sans continued.

"Their just a fuckin slut! They're using you! I did ya a favor!"

Papyrus tried to ignore it. He really did! He knew you loved him! You were there for him and told him to be himself, you helped him and did what you could and he loved you over the months you were together. You didn't rush things and you did your best to help him, you were a rebound but he loved you.

"Sans stop. Please" Papyrus whispered.

"They loved me first!"

"God, have you ever shut up!? I told you TO STOP!" Papyrus yelled out.

Sans glared at him, opening his mouth again to talk but Papyrus stopped him.

" You've done everything you can for me!? Wow what a fucking joke! Oh YEA I loved being 16 and having to get you at grillbys drunk out of your goddamn mind talking about what a piece of shit dad was! Thanks a bunch!" Papyrus sadly chuckled out, tears ready to spill.

Sans didn't say anything, he just stood there looking away, a guilty expression on his face. But Papyrus didn't care; he needed to let this out.

"Oh oh! I loved that I could never date anyone in highschool because you always scared them off! I loved how you kept the child proof block on the computer when I was 20!" The taller skeleton went on and on, his voice getting more rough the angrier he got.

"Paps your- look I was doing it for your safety!" Sans countered back.

Papyrus let out a tsk.

"Funny how you say you care for me but put me through so much suffering with your selfish stupid choices! How many times have I had to help you get up and get dressed after you get blackout drunk! How many times did I have to cook for you! How many times did you make Undyne swear to not let me into the guard!? It's always about you. I constantly have to be your anchor! The one to help you! While all you did was restrict me! God when I was 16 you found me drinking and made me lose my friends over it! " He let out a shaky sigh "I was the laughing stock! You ever wonder why I never went to college!? not that you WOULD let me!! You wouldn't even let me on the surface until 5 months of BEGGING YOU,!" Papyrus ranted on, his voice becoming hoarse as orange tears fell don't his face.

"They fucked you up Papyrus! I don't know what they did! But you're not YOU." Sans cried out.

Papyrus looked down at him with tears worth years of frustration down his face. Of course. Of course he wouldn't listen.

"They helped me open my eyes! You don't get to treat me that way! Not when Mettaton broke up with me and YOU WEREN'T THERE FOR ME! I thought if I was your support you would be mine but I guess I was WORNG" was the last thing Papyrus said, tears falling down his face.

Sans looked at him back with his own blue tears before Papyrus heard his backdoor open. Asgore stood there with a saddened look. Whether he heard everything he didn't say anything as he dragged Sans away.

.
He had to get a restraining order on sans and the king made sure Sans was kept away from him.

Today was his 78th session. And was also the day he was finally able to see you again...you both sent letters but he couldn't face you after what happened..you are also in therapy.11 He felt.. nervous, sad, happy, guilty.. unworthy.

His therapist sat across from him. Their nomad in one hand.

"Today is a big day...I know you have mixed feelings." They told him.

Papyrus let out a sigh looking down at his ripped jeans and white studded combat boots.

"Do...you think they'll like my outfit?" He asked, playing with his black turtleneck.

The therapist nodded, smiling.

"We've come a long way Papyrus... you've controlled your volume...after years of forcing it to be louder... you've understood that you shouldn't force yourself to change for someone you love and understand that feelings are complicated things...you have also overcome your way of thinking and bought your own house and have started collage again majoring in your interests even if it's online, you'll see y/n today...do you believe that you'll be able to see your other friends soon?" They told him.

He stiffened a bit.
."...I don't know...I want too..I miss everyone but can they even want me after I lied about who I was for so long? After what my brother did. He almost caused a war and we're still dealing with that-"

"We can talk about this latar if you'd like. Your time to see y/n is soon" they told him.

With that he got up and started walking out the door, his soul thumping in his ribcage...would you even still love him? The thought made him uneasy, you only dated for a couple of months.

----

You were going to see Papyrus today. It..was nerve-wracking. You had only been sending letters while you were in a facility.

After what Sans did the outrage was huge. The queen took you in and made a facility to help you recover and to even sign in monster haters for classes on monster culture and why the judge was so important. Sans did have to wear a magic restraining collar when he wasn't being the judge or so you heard on the news.

The monster community even offered to help you pay for a new place as political battles between the king and queen with their respectful subjects followed them. The king freed Sans. The queen made it so he wore the collar though. So. You were in the middle of two powerful beings and monsters who seemed to want to help you or blame you for messing with the judge.

You had been going to therapy and the doctor for the past year. You had...mixed feelings. Your scars were noticeable and they made you self conscious. You constantly wore masks and hats. Your memory was pretty fuzzy most of the time but you could function. You just couldn't recall how you got hurt, you knew why. You should hate Sans and his name makes you cry and your heart ache for some reason but you can't remember the day it happened.

Papyrus. That name...made you feel things. Love, happy? Confused? Scared, pity, a strong desire to hold him close and protect him. You remember bits and pieces of your dates...you loved him.

You were waiting outside with the Queen, her paws resting on your head while you set down your one bag of stuff. Apparently your house had been sold by Papyrus and Sans lived somewhere else. You don't know what happened to your clothes.

"Do not fret, Papyrus, though I have not seen him in a while, is a good monster. He just needed time, he cared very deeply about you and Sans." She told you, her voice wavered at your attacker's name.

You looked across the street seeing a sharp black lean car park in front of the building. It stayed still a moment and Toriel peered inside letting out a small gasp when she saw who it was. Soon you gasped too, the familiar feeling of tears stinging at your eyes as you watched a tall Skeleton get out of the vehicle.

"Paps…?" You whimpered out, fuck it was overwhelming to see his face.

You ran up to him jumping into his arms and he caught you.

"Y/N!" He called out to you before pressing a kiss on you and you feverishly kissed him back.

Toriel came closer.

"Papyrus...my how you've changed. I'm glad to see you well" she said.

Papyrus looked over to her.

" I'm sorry for not talking sooner" he told her.

Toriel gasped at his low volume.

"I'll see you soon but for now I'll take my mate and rest take care of them the best I can" he told her.

"I will visit your address once a month to check on them if you don't mind" the goat woman said while hw eyes roamed on his outfit.

"Yes. Of course." He simply said Ignoring her gaze.

He scooped you up and nuzzled your neck making you giggle. Toriel blinked her eyes before letting out a loud cough. A blush overtaking her white fur.

"...I will get going now," she said, turning her heel back to the facility.

Papyrus smiled as you kissed him on the cheek.

"Let's go now shall we?" He asked.

You felt your soul pulse with happiness. .

" Yea" you told him

-----
It's been a couple months since you moved in with Papyrus. The house was nice. You had your own room and even a nice back garden Papyrus spent his time in.

Your memories have been fuzzy but you're starting to remember Sans.

You.

You don't like to remember him. At first the memories made you feel fuzzy before twisting into anger and heartbreak. You had more than a couple breakdowns since you started remembering and Papyrus helped you through all of them. You talk about them to your therapist.

Toriel came by to check on you as promised and was very pleased to see you were doing ok. Though she kept giving Papyrus weird glances as she looked across the slightly messy living room with monster movies on the couch and his baggy sweatpants with turtlenecks. You don't get why she's looking so troubled over something that simple. You didn't remember much about Papyrus other than dates but he'd always been this kind and loving person. The horror was just new but you didn't care.

She asked how you were doing. You told her you were fine. Happy even. She asked if Papyrus was treating you alright? Had he been acting differently? Keep in mind she made sure to whisper these things to you.

You thought for a moment.

Despite you and Papyrus being date mates from what you remember you don't seem to do anything date matey. There's some light cuddling but he refuses to touch you more. You narrow your eyebrows as you think about the patches of memories of you and Papyrus.

...no he was really handsy. But not now.
Horror movies were a new thing. His clothes too. But overall he seemed the same.

"He hasn't been as touchy as we were dating. The most we'll do is cuddle and the clothes and horror movies are new but I knew he liked horror he just never opened up about it'" you told her.

She let out a small hum as if she was thinking while glancing over to Papyrus who was making you a coffee In the kitchen.

"What do you mean touchy?" She asked, Toriel was pretty confused by how Papyrus acted now, it was confusing and nothing like himself.

Did the outlast and aftermath of San's action affect him that much? The queen herself was also shocked to see her best friend commit such an act on Papyrus's girlfriend simply for dating him.

"Like he doesn't grab my ass and make sex jokes anymore" you blurt out.

Toriel reeled back in her chair with a shocked gasp almost tipping over and you heard Papyrus almost drop a mug stiffened as hard as a board.

"....."
"......."

"....."

Papyrus looked away from Toriels glare and you sat there confused but then smug when you saw his bright orange face. Your lips curved into a grin. Toriel blinked at you before glaring at Papyrus one more time.

"He was touchy you say?" She asked with a haughty tone, you couldn't see it but Papyrus shrunk a bit.

You smiled some more wondering if embarrassing your mate was a good thing.

It was.

"... what's wrong Papyrus…?" You asked in a sweet tone.

Both monsters looked at you confused before you went on.

"Thought...I'd be like noodles" you paused watching his brain click it together.

The goat monster sat in her chair flickering her eyes between the two of you.

"Y/N no! It was one time!" He begged out.

You stopped talking and he looked so relieved.

"Hot and wet under your heat" you said before busting out laughing.

"NOOOOO!" He screamed, hiding his face.

----
Toriel didn't ask after that.

After almost a year you got your memories back. You started going to college with Papyrus. He was majoring in chemistry out of all things. You thought for sure it would be mechanics since he likes puzzles.

Sans...is a sore topic for you. You don't see him or know about him. Though you and Papyrus did get phones and social media accounts. Papyrus hangs out with Undyne and Alphys a lot. Mostly Alphys. Sometimes you get the feeling Papyrus is passive aggressive towards Undyne for some reason. She caught on. You didn't say anything.

You and Papyrus decided to make a horror gaming channel. You thought it would be fun for your boyfriend since he liked horror and puzzles. Video games are the best. And being a monster was helpful to explain monster culture during live streams.

You guys weren't famous but you had some followers.

You even made an Instagram account for it. You had 3000 followers. You mostly posted game nights and cute couple pics. Sometimes you got hate comments but you both ignored them.

There was...this one creepy account though. It was a blank account, no pictures or bio, just a profile picture that was a sunset.

They liked all your pictures, followed everyone you knew and even some private accounts they shouldn't have known about. It was creepy. You blocked them but then another account just did the same things. Nobody could figure it out. Papyrus looked uneasy.

The account didn't do any harm though. And you guys forgot about it.
----
You Decided to adopt a cat for his graduation. He always wanted to say dogs were too much work and liked to bite him. So you did. It'll be a surprise when he comes home today.

Now that it's been 5 years. You can go out with your scars and think about sans without having a mental breakdown.

It's like a distant memory. You feel bad for Sans and you miss him. But today isn't about how you missed him. It was about your Amazing mate Papyrus.

And how he's standing on stage of a university holding up his diploma while monsters cheered for him.

God you loved him. Tears streamed down your cheeks as you clapped and sent kisses to him not being able to wait till you go home and show him the new cat.

.

Just like tears streamed on cheekbones in the distance thinking about how he could never hug his brother from the tree he was hiding in.