Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Normally when ranboo wakes up he is pretty out of it for a good four or so minutes, but today, within 30 seconds of waking up, he is fully 100% conscious . Now here you might ask why, and the answer is quite simple . Ranboo is not in his room. Or tubbo’s house. The house he is in is vaguely familiar, but it’s also absolutely freezing . Ranboo looks out the window to see two cottages with a bridge in between them a distance away in a snowy wasteland backed by trees and a dark fence.

“What the…'' Ranboo pauses as he brings his hands up to rub the sleep out of his eyes . He pauses because he’s hands were not in fact his hands. Though his hands are often seen wearing gloves of black and white, his hands were not actually black and white , these hands however were in fact black and white. They had long spindly fingers ,the right hand was a light grey , speckled with dark purple and black freckles , and the left hand was more of a really dark purple with white and light purple freckles. Both hands were painted with burn(?) scars.

Ranboo’s tails bristle and he tenses . Ranboo doesn’t have a tail,and he definitely did not have two . Ranboo looks around his room once more,and slowly recognizes it as a far more realistic version of his Minecraft house on the dream smp, it even has the rug of his Minecraft character on the floor ( it’s still a picture of his Minecraft skin, it’s not hyper realistic like everything else). Ranboo stands up and walks around his house , and the only thing that is in the house that wasn’t in Minecraft was an extra door, he quickly opened it to find that it was just a small bathroom, just a toilet sink and mirror.

Ranboo looked in the mirror and almost fainted . The only thing that wasn’t wrong with the picture was that in the mirror was the t-shirt and sweat pants that he was wearing. His hair was an odd split dye of black and white, opposite to the way his face was colored. His face was split half and half by a splotchy divide , black on the left, white on the right, both once again sprayed with freckles. large pointy ears jutted out of the side of his has as well as horns on the top of his head. There were what looked like dimples on his cheeks , but on further examination they turned out to be the rest of his mouth. The most startling aspect of his appearance were his eyes . His eyes were heterochromatic, the right was red , the left green, the pupils were dark blue and catlike. Tear tracks littered his face, though he wasn’t crying. They were scars, he had many scars all over him, but the tear scars were the deepest and most noticeable ones.

Ranboo kept examining his face until a buzzing from his room distracted him. He reached his room and found what looked like an odd phone, which was the source of the buzzing. Tubbo was calling.

“Hi tubbo!” Ranboo couldn’t keep the shaking or of his voice though he tried to to sound normal and happy

“Oh thank god your here too!… you are here too, right?” Tubbo sounded nervous not even trying to hide it

“ well im not in the uk anymore if that’s what you are asking, judging by the fact you are calling me and asking were I am im guessing you aren’t in the uk either?” Ranboo ask sounding almost amused

“No! I’m not! I’m in snowchester! It’s so fucking cool, I look like a piece of fan art! I have the scars and everything!” Ranboo chuckled at tubbo’s excitement

“ I also look like fan art,it’s almost scary . I think I’ll head over to snowchester after I see if phill and techno are also here or if it’s just us.” Ranboo statues walking down the stairs, searching for something to get dressed in

“ ok bsoiso man , see you when you get here .” Tubbo hung up leaving Ranboo on his own. Ranboo got dressed , and clad himself in armor head to toe after discovering that because snow it water , it also hurt. Then Ranboo set off for Phil’s house.

Chapter Text

Phill woke up slumped against a blue wall which scared the shit out of him. He looked around and realized that he was in his Minecraft basement . At first he thought he was in an anime but quickly realized he was in his basement , because of the vast amounts of chest near a ladder . Phill came to the reasonable conclusion that he was dreaming, and jus went up the ladder . He quickly realized he wasn’t dreaming when his foot missed the third step , fell on his back , and knocked the wind out of himself.

Phill stood up and rubbed his back because it hurt , when he felt feathers. Of course he had wings, after all , this is a very weird situation. He stretched out his wings to see if the would work, but the left wing is quite injured and there for useless . Phill quickly climbed the ladder again, this time not falling.

He made it to the bridge between his and techno’s houses. He looked out on the landscape and admired the snowy mountains which are only broken by Ranboo’s little house. Phill could see Ranboo in his house , but figured that techno was closer so he would talk to him first

Phill knocked on the door and got no answer . He knocked on the door again and got no answer. Finally he turned around and saw the note on his door.

The note reads “ gone out, be back in a few days - techno”

Phill rolls his eyes, and enters his house . He looks around the room , looking at all of the decorations now that they are all realistic. Phill rifled through the chests to grab his armour when he heard a knock at his door . He opened the door and there was Ranboo .

“ god you look terrifying mate…” phil takes a semi step back as he sees Ranboo . They were taller than Phil’s door. They were wearing a blue sweater with a white button down underneath , though you could barely tell because they were a mountain of netherite

“Heh, what do you mean phil?” Ranboo laughed sheepishly

“Listen mate, I’m going to level with you, I just woke up here,”phil looked Ranboo in the face “I went to sleep last night, not here , and I woke up here. Does that make any sense?” Ranboo visibly relaxed

“Oh thank goodness” Ranboo sighed “Tubbo said he woke up in snowchester, si I knew I wasn’t the only one , but it’s still a relief that there was also someone else…” they looked down at phill

“I am a lot taller than 6ft6” Ranboo chuckled to themselves then paused “is techno…?”

“I have no clue, but probably not, I just have a note that says that he left and won’t be back for quite a bit.” Phill scratched his head “ you said tubbo was from irl too?”

“I’m like 98% sure, he said , an I quote ‘I look like a piece of fan art’, but it’s tubbo you can’t really know.”they rolled their eyes “Any way I’m headed to snowchester, want to come with?”

“Yea mate, just let me get changed.”

Chapter Text

Tubbo woke up in a bed surrounded by spruce walls. This struck tubbo as odd for two reasons, one, he knows for a fact that he didn’t fall asleep, for he is a gremlin who never sleeps, and two, his walls all have drywall on them, these walls don’t .

Tubbo looked around and took in his surroundings. The bed was pushed against the wall, armour stacked haphazardly next to the bed and propped up against a pair of weird looking boots, and there was a brown and green jacket in place of a pillow on the bed. Against the other wall was a barrel, a table and an anvil, all odd pieces of furniture . Tubbo was wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of thick pants. At the end of his pants were a pair of feet , but not his feet, well they were attached to him, but they were like goats hooves. Explains the odd boots. Finally at the back wall was a ladder with a trap door at the top.

Tubbo climbed up the ladder and entered the room, all to find a small child and two chickens. He realized where he was as soon as the small child ran up to him and screamed “Da!”. Michael was only as tall as tubbo’s knee , but he was so excited to see tubbo.

“Oh hi Michael ! I didn’t know that I would see you today!” Tubbo picked Michael up under his armpits and held him. Michael giggled and babbled incorrectly. Michael looked about three years old, he had brown hair and a bit of exposed skull on his face, his ears were abnormally long and pointy.

“I have to go do something, I’ll come back soon” Tubbo put Michael down and left the room. Grabbing the jacket off his bed and going through the pockets as he walked outside . From the porch he could see all of snowchester, and it was beautiful .

The cabin was almost at the seafront, which was brimmed with ice. There were docks that webbed their way over the water, leading to what Tubbo assumed was the nuclear launch site. Snow has everywhere , and oddly enough so we’re berry bushes . By far the most noticeable thing was the mansion.

The mansion was absolutely massive , like a thousand times bigger than Tubbo thought it would be . It towed into the sky, and it would have cast a massive shadow on snowchester if the sun weren’t shining in the opposite direction.

It took Tubbo a moment to realize why he didn’t notice the massive building sooner . It should have been in the peripheral vision on his right side . He just plain couldn’t see out of his right eye. He tested this by rapidly closing one eye and the other .

“Oh pog I can’t see” Tubbo leaned on the railing of the porch and touched his face. It had an odd texture. Wubbo went inside and looked at his appearance on his most reflective piece of armour and got a good look at his face.

The entire right side of his face was marred with burn scars, and his eye was bright yellow. The other half of his face looked mostly normal, it had a few cut scars , but otherwise it looked like his irl face. His ears were odd though. They judded off the side of his head, and they were like goats ears.

Tubbo ran his hands through his hair, snagging them on two little bumps. Of course he also has the ever so famous horns that he didn't think was actually cannon, but he supposes that he did say that it could be cannon if chat wanted it to .

Tubbo rifled through his pockets and pulled out what looked like an odd phone and scrolled through the contacts. The top one was ranboo, and he pressed call.

“Hi tubbo!” ranboo’s voice was audibly shaking, and tubbo thought this meant that ranboo was also in a similar situation

“Oh thank god your here too!” tubbo paused, didn't ranboo write his character super nervous? Wouldn't his character have a rather shaky? Would character ranboo be nervous around character tubbo? Aren't they married? “… you are here too, right?”tubbo asked , letting his second guessing get the best of him.

Tubbo heard ranboo relax, and with that so did he.

“ well i'm not in the uk anymore if that’s what you are asking, judging by the fact you are calling me and asking where I am i'm guessing you aren’t in the uk either?” when ranboo said that tubbo almost giggled

Their conversation was rather short, because the two of them have to figure out their respective situations. Tubbo hung up, and started getting ready. Before he left he went back upstairs and hugged michael goodbye.

Tubbo tramped through the snow, with no set destination, only knowing that he wasn't going to leave snow chester, because ranboo was on his way. Tubbo had passed a cookie stand when a door behind him slammed shut and a barrage of swearing rang out from whoever came from the door.

“How the absolute fuc are we going to find the fucking- oh hi tubbo, why do you look like a lost puppy?” tubbo wheeled around to see who ever was talking. The man who was talking was wearing a large cricket similar to tubbo’s except his was open, showing a blue and black striped hoodie. He was holding a pair of glasses with mismatched lenses, one red and the other blue, and the other hand was raised, asif it was pausing from doing whatever it was previously doing before it was interrupted.

“Oh hi...jack..?” the man kind of looked like jack, but tubbo wasn't one hundred precent positive.

“Uh yea, tubbo are you ok? You look and sound confused, should i call someone?'' Jack seemed to be rather concerned. He put his glasses back on and stepped toward tubbo.

“Yea im fine, and if i weren't i already called ranboo, so i won't be alone once he gets here.” tubbo shifted uncomfortably , rocking back and forth on his feet. Jack opened his mouth as if he were going to say something, but thought better of whatever he was going to say

“ well i'm sure they’ll take care of you . any way im off, i have to go find the ‘firework’ that we fucking lost” and with that jack was tromping through the snow again. Tubbo sat confused for a second as he tried to figure out why jack emphasized the word ‘they’ll’ . it took him a moment but then he remembered that here, somethings that chat made cannon, were cannon to this universe, and chat had decided that character ranboo was nonbinary.

Tubbo continued walking around, admiring how different parts of the server translated into hyperrealism.

Chapter Text

Tommy woke , and stood to use the bathroom, he hadn't even registered his surroundings when he fell flat on his face.

“What the fuck..?” tommy groggily looked around and finally realized that the room he was in is not his room. That immediately jolted him awake. He wasn't in his house. He wasn't in his room. Where the fuck was he. Also why did he fall?

Tommy sat up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He soon realizes that he cant feel his left leg.

“Shit what the fuck?” tommy’s leg was missing from right below the knee, and by all accounts was not a clean cut at all. But it was 100% healed . tommy pulled himself back onto the bed he was previously sleeping on.

Looking around, the walls ere made of dirt and there were two wooden boxes stacked against the wall. There was also a gargantuan spider in a glass cage suspended from the ceiling.

“AHHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK, WHY IS THAT SPIDER SO FUCKING HUGE” tommy soon realized that that was an odd thing to fixate on , considering that he was in a vaguely familiar house that he couldn't quite place, but then again this spider was massive.

Tommy calmed down and noticed a metal leg that seemed to be glowing purple. He shrugged and tried to put it on, finding it far more difficult to do so than expected, but after about forty five minutes he got it on properly, periodically checking to see of the spider would get out of its cage.

Voices came from outside the doors and tommy hobbled over to them, as he was not experienced with a prosthetic leg, and then popped his head out to see two humanoid figures walking down a wooden path.

The taller of the two figures was taller by a long shot, like two feet taller. The taller was also terrifying , they had two tails, pointy ears and horns, and was split half and half black and white. That wasn't even the scariest aspect of then, they were clothed head to toe in sleek yet bulky armor.

The other figure, while smaller, was not weak looking, in fact quite the opposite. they could probably snap tommy in half like a twig. They were wearing mostly green clothes, and they was also wearing armor, but not nearly as much as the other person, but still was intimidating. There was a pair of ebony wings folded against their back.
“AHHHH HOLY SHIT WHO THE FUCK-” tommy cut himself off when the two turned their attention to him. He silently stepped back inside, and slammed the door. He curled his knees to his chest whilst sitting in the corner, as silently as he possibly could.

“Tommy? Are you ok?” a muffled voice came form behind the door as well as soft knocking. Tommy recognized that voice.

“Phil..?” tommy whispered ever so faintly, so quietly tommy could barely hear it himself.

“Tommy, mate, sorry we scared you, though to be fair ranboo scared the shit out of me when i first saw him as well.” ranboo? That thing was not ranboo.

“Go away. Tommy’s not here,” tommy squeaked

“Tommy, its me phil. I dont exactly look like it , I have no clue whats going on. Will you come out so we can talk?” he sounded sincere , but tommy was still quite skeptical. He tried to stand up and immediately fell over again

“Fuck” tommy hoisted himself up on his bed and stood up, this time not falling.

“Tommy? What happened?” that voice was ranboo, not phil this time.

“Fuck, im not used to only having one leg, thats what happened.” tommy said as he swung open the door. Phil looked like phil, but with long hair, wings, and was a bit more built than normal. But ranboo looked nothing like ranboo.

“You’re missing a leg?” ranboo looked rather concerned.

“Yes, thats what i just said aint it?” tommy leaned agains the door to take the weight off of his leg “why do you look like that boob boy, also where are we?”

“One, dont call me boob boy, two, i think we are in a hype realistic version of the dream smp, and we look like our characters” ranboo explained.

“My character has two legs though.”

“I imagine popular fannon things transported over too, also it makes sense , in exile you only had one shoe, and then lead to an arctic wasteland. Probably got frostbite.”

“Ah makes sense.”

“Any way we are headed to snowchester to see tubbo and figure out whats going on, wanna tag along?” ranboo offered, and tommy nodded.

“Uh yea just let me get ready” and with that tommy walked back inside and opened one of the wooden boxes that he now recognizes as chests, and grabbed some of his things.

Chapter Text

Hello everyone. I know I haven’t updated this fic in a long time, and that’s because I got kinda stuck with where I wanted the story to go. I had about half a chapter more on my google doc, but it didn’t meet my writing standards so I never posted it. None the less, I will not continue to write dsmp fanfics because I feel wrong for writing about a dead person, even if he played a minor role on the story. For those of you unaware, Technoblade passed of cancer recently, and his family released a video on his channel. I’ve been watching Technoblades content since I was nine years old, and to hear that he passed was devastating, and I can’t imagine what people who were closer to him are going through. If you still want to support techno in some way, a portion of his merch sales are going to cancer research, and I’m pretty sure the rest goes to his family. There is also a memorial book on hypixel that what you write in it will be printed out into a physical book for his family.

(I wrote this message wit my fic what a peculiar time in mind, but everything I’ve written is applicable to hit ‘em with the ole swicheroo)