Archive of Our Own ^beta

It was too much. Every sound, light, and movement added to the impending tidal wave that was threatening to crash on you.

You had experienced overstimulation before, but never this bad. Every student talking felt like drills in your head. Every candle floating in the great hall felt like a meteor about to crash to earth. Your robes scratched against your skin, and you were tempted to rip them off in the middle of dinner. 

You began hyperventilating, and grasped desperately at the tablecloth so that your knuckles began to grow white. You quickly stood up, startling Newt, who was sitting across from you. You powerwalked out of the hall, trying to ignore the hundreds of students who watched you practically storm out.

You ran your hands through your hair, desperately trying to ground yourself and make this pass, but to no avail. You slumped against the wall of a quiet corridor and slid to the ground, beginning to sob.

As your emotions overtook you, you didn’t notice the hurried footsteps that followed you. 

Newt stood in front of your shaking frame, not knowing what to do.

“Y/n? Are you alright?”

You knew he was talking to you, but his words didn’t register in your head, and they simply added to the plethora of reasons you were sobbing.

Newt crouched down to you and tenderly placed a hand on your knee. This broke your trance of panic, and caused you to jolt at the touch.

You looked up at him, tears streaming down your face. You could barely make out his face, but you could almost feel the concern flooding from his soul. He rubbed small circles into your knee and sat down next to you.

“Is it happening again? The overwhelming thing?”

You nodded your head slowly, dropping your face back into your knees. It felt like the only thing keeping you from dropping into an endless void was the small movements from Newt’s thumb on your knee, creating a sanctuary in the hell that had formed around you.

“Do you want to talk through it? Or just wait it out?” He spoke quietly, the same way you would to a scared puppy.

No words managed to escape your throat, but you held out your hands towards Newt, silently asking him for help. He quickly caught on and pulled you onto his lap, engulfing you in the most comforting embrace you’ve ever experienced.

You clutched onto Newts robes as he gently steadied you, resting his head on your neck. The slight swaying combined with the pressure of Newt’s hands around you made every noise quieter, every light dimmer, and every sensation warmer. 

He felt like home.

~~~

Once you had stopped crying, Newt took you back to your dorm. Newt often walked you back to your dorms, going as far as he could before getting yelled at by the girls prefect. This time, he held your hand in his and walked slowly, talked softly, and hid in the shadows at the door to your room so he could talk to you before a student noticed him.

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yes Newt, thank you for helping me. I’m fine now,” you said with a gentle smile.

“Well, if anything like this happens again, please let me know? I just… I worry about you,” even though he smiled back at you, you could clearly hear the sad tone in his voice.

Being one of Newt’s only friends, you knew he cared deeply for you, but as you grew older you noticed that he had slowly become more gentle, affectionate, and sensitive towards you. You had thought it was just because he was getting older, and his true personality was coming out, but when he spoke to anyone but you, it came out in stutters and mumbles. 

When you first explained your sudden bursts of hypersensitivity to Newt, he didn’t fully understand but he listened to you, and the next day he bought you a pair of earmuffs while the two of you were in Hogsmeade. 

You loved Newt, and for the majority of your friendship it had been platonic, but the way he cared for you made you long for something more. The lingering gazes as you studied together always made you want to know what was going on in his head. The way his eyes lit up when he saw you sitting in the Hufflepuff common room made you wonder if he only smiled at you like that.

“You don’t need to worry about me, Newt, I can take care of myself… most of the time,” you chuckled.

Newt’s face remained serious.
“I want to care for you, Y/n. You have always been so kind to me, I feel I need to return the favour. And it’s not just that! I truly do care for you, and I often find my mind drifting to you on instinct. You are the light of my life and it truly pains me to see you so distressed,” he gently grabbed both your hands. “I-I don’t know how to say this… I don’t want to overcomplicate things I really don’t… I just…

I’m in love with you.”

You stared, dumbfounded at Newt. You looked down at your hands in his gentle grasp and smiled to yourself.

“I love you too, Newt.”