Chapter Text
Sometimes you questioned if the monster you were rehabilitating was as dumb as everybody thought he was.
The monster- some kind of weird skeleton dog… horse… dragon… thing- had been rescued from a fighting ring a couple months ago. He was littered with scars and cracks, but despite his past, he wasn’t aggressive. Sure, he didn’t like to be touched, but when he was, he didn’t bite or growl, just gently shied away from the contact.
It had been a couple years since the monsters had emerged from the underground and your people, the humans, had… “taken them in.” You didn’t like it, and there was a small portion of people who fought what had happened, but it was to no avail. Humans took advantage, and given that there were so few monsters in the world, they’d all been captured in a matter of weeks. You didn’t know what had happened to all of them, but… you knew what had happened to this one.
He laid in his bed in the corner of the room, eyes lazily trained on the TV. He was a large skeletal quadruped, about the size of a Shiba Inu or small Border Collie. He didn’t do much- he liked to watch TV with you and sleep, occasionally scarfing down a meal, but apart from that… he seemed content to just lay around and do nothing. For a while, you hadn’t questioned that this was maybe just a primitive monster. They existed! You’d read about monsters like Moldsmals, who were barely even sentient, and assumed that this skeleton monster was just… a little less developed.
But as the weeks went on, you began to wonder.
He always came when called. He liked to watch TV. One night you walked into your kitchen to find him nosing around in the fridge, though as soon as he spotted you he ran with his tail between his legs. He never barked or made noise, apart from a small whimper when you had first attempted to pet him. You hadn’t done that again. He’d come from a harsh background, and you weren’t going to press him. He was in such bad shape and so unique that you had accepted he might be the last dog you rehabilitate. He didn't like other dogs, and you didn't want to send him away, so...
You stared at him from the couch. He eventually noticed and gave you a look before huffing and going back to the TV. The little lights in his eyes were white.
“Hey, Tib,” you called. It was short for Tibia. He raised his head and looked at you.
“... Can you understand me?”
For a second you thought a flash of something- emotion?- went through his sockets. You must have been mistaken, though, because he laid his head back down and turned away from you.
Well, that was one way to make a fool of yourself.
Tib was a good companion. He didn’t require maintenance like a normal dog would, since apparently skeleton monsters like him didn’t go to the bathroom or anything. It made your country house a little less lonely.
You took him outside often. He liked to sit in the sun and look at the sky. Maybe that was the monster in him- being trapped underground for a majority of his life must have been dark and scary. He didn’t run or play like a normal animal, just basked in the rays and slept. One time he sniffed the flowers, only to return to the porch and sleep under the swing. You liked to read a book in the shade when this happened. He always seemed a little bit on edge, so his sleep never got to that deep, completely-out state that most animals got to. When he was sleeping, though, you looked at this scars. He had them all over- on his ribs, his spine, his head. He had bite marks from other dogs all over him, and significant scarring on his front and back legs. The poor thing had been through hell.
When you had the occasional anxiety attack, Tib sat close by as though offering emotional support. You didn’t try to pet him, though you wanted to.
When you fell down the stairs and knocked your head so hard you passed out, you actually didn’t know what Tib did.
One moment you were bringing a basket of laundry down, and the next you were waking up to unfamiliar human faces lifting you onto a gurney. Your head and joints hurt like hell.
They carted you off to the hospital. They said you had a concussion, but that you could recover at home as long as you didn’t go up the stairs. You would have to sleep in the living room, but you agreed. You hated hospitals.
It was only when you were dropped off at your house and saw Tib in the window, waiting anxiously, that you wondered how the paramedics had known to come to your house.
You unlocked the door and went in. You had the things you were supposed to do tucked in your head- no screen time, plenty of rest and hydration, have a neighbor come over to check on you at some point. Tib greeted you by hurrying over, little skeletal claws clacking against the hardwood floor, and sniffing you.
“Hey, bud. I’m okay,” you said, letting him sniff your hand. He looked up at your face for a moment before he gave you some room to walk. He didn’t stop following you as you made your way to the kitchen and got a drink, turning the bright light off and opting for a couple of lamps instead.
“Just a concussion and some bruises- I’ll be okay,” you said, mostly to yourself. Tib was acting like you’d keel over any moment. You got a glass of water and went to the living room couch, sitting down and taking a mild pain reliever.
Tib dutifully went to his bed. You didn’t stop looking at him.
“Tib… how’d the paramedics know I was in trouble?”
Tib stared at the floor, tail tucked.
You couldn’t be right, though. How could Tib, who couldn’t even talk, call the ambulance? But he was the only other thing here, wasn’t he? How else could they have known? Your neighbors weren't close enough to see anything, and they never came by to visit.
You didn’t press it. In fact, you didn’t want to know right now. Maybe you'd called them but had forgotten because of the trauma. Your head hurt, and thinking about it made it hurt more.
You laid down with a sigh and slept for a while.
Chapter Text
It was another couple of weeks before you were back to one hundred percent again. Tib was good company in that time, just like he always was.
He got sad sometimes. You didn’t know why, and there weren’t really any monster doctors or vets out there to help you. He wouldn’t eat for a couple of days, or he’d sleep way more than normal. Today was one of those days.
“Mind if I come sit with you, bud?” you asked. Tib didn’t seem to care either way. He was in his bed.
You sat beside it. How badly you wanted to reach out and stroke his skull, but you withheld. You didn’t want to break the trust you’d established with the monster, and if your suspicions of him calling the ambulance were correct…
“You wanna go outside? I know it’s a bit late, but… the stars are out, we can turn the porch light off and look at them.”
Tib raised his head a little. He got up from his bed and you stood, too. He followed you outside.
You did as promised and the two of you sat on the porch steps looking up. The stars were out and shining bright that night. You didn’t really know constellations, but you saw the big dipper.
You looked over at your companion. A couple of blue-tinged tears rolled down the side of his skull. You looked back up at the stars and pretended you hadn’t seen them.
It occurred to you at some point that even if Tib was intelligent enough to understand you, maybe he couldn’t talk.
You were enjoying your weekend with the monster when you decided to make a fool of yourself again.
“Tib, you probably can’t talk… but if you could … do you think you’d talk to me?”
The skeleton beast looked at you from his bed. He stared at you.
You sighed. “I know, but… if you are smarter than you’re letting on, then… you deserve more than just sitting around the house, right? If you… can understand me… I want you to know that I’m not going to be mad if you decide to, you know… act like it?”
There it was again. Some sort of emotion in his eyelights. You held your breath, hoping maybe he’d do something, move, cry again…
Tib whimpered and curled himself away from you, face towards the wall. You took in the scars and cracks lacing his ribs, his spine, the bite marks taken out of him. If he was leading you on, if he was smarter than he was letting you know… he’d still been through hell.
“That’s okay, bud. I’m gonna…” You trailed off.
He was shaking like a leaf. He hadn’t shivered like this since he’d first come to you, scared and alone. You stood awkwardly and walked over to his bed.
“Hey… you good, buddy?” you asked as you got down on your knees beside him.
He whined. He turned his head enough to look at you with one of his big eyes, and you saw the tears falling.
You didn’t say a thing. This all but confirmed it, right? But you didn’t feel like you’d made a discovery, or a victory, you just felt… sad.
“It’s okay…” you tried to say, but he shook his head and pawed at his muzzle. He was crying freely now, big blue tears landing on the bed below him as he shuddered.
There was an unfamiliar crackle of magic. You blinked before falling back on your ass as it filled the air. You’d never felt magic before- hardly any humans had it anymore, and the monsters…
It happened and was over before you could comprehend what was going on. You heard the bones crack and pop, saw Tib’s body contort, change… and in only a few seconds, you were left staring at… a skeleton.
A human skeleton.
You were dumbfounded. You couldn’t speak. Sure, you’d suspected he was smart, but you hadn’t… you didn’t think…
He was on his hands and knees, gasping for breath on the large dog bed, shaking badly. He was naked, which before hadn’t been a problem, but…
You didn’t know why your first instinct was to grab the throw blanket from the couch and quickly drape it over him.
He yelped and startled badly at the feel, immediately curling into a fetal position. His left eyelight was blinking blue and yellow. He looked at you, still crying, still gasping and shuddering.
“I… I’m sorry, I didn’t… mean to scare you…” you said, completely at a loss. “Are you, uhm… okay?”
“‘m sorry.”
You didn’t know what sort of voice you’d expected from him, but the low pitch threw you for a moment. It was sort of raspy, probably from disuse.
He cried. His voice shook as he brought a hand up and wiped at his tears. “god, th-this is stupid- i’ll- i’ll turn back, don’t… don’t call the shelter-”
“No! No no, you’re… you’re okay. I’m not sending you anywhere, I just… I don’t really know what to say.”
You sat in silence for a while as Tib’s breathing calmed down. He kept chancing glances up at you in what could only be fear. He pulled the blanket around himself.
“Do you… need anything?”
“j-just… just give m-me a minute…” he stuttered. He was a small skeleton. Though he was curled up and laying down at the moment, you could see he was probably only four feet tall.
He sat up, eventually, covering himself in the blanket. His movements were unsure and shaky, but he made it into a sitting position.
“So… you… is this what you normally look like?” you asked.
“...yeah.”
“Tib-”
“please-” he choked, closing his eyes as the tears fell. “please don’t c-call me that.”
“Oh. Oh, I’m sorry, I… I guess I don’t actually know your name…”
“sans,” he said softly.
“Sans,” you repeated. His skull was small and he was able to express a lot of emotions despite being made of bone. “Sans… why didn’t you…? I… you’ve been here for months, I didn’t… I had no idea…”
“‘m not worth nothin’ like this,” he said simply. A hand came up again to wipe the tears. It was so small. “didn’t know… if you’d send me back.”
To the fighting ring? The shelter. You put two and two together.
“You called the ambulance, didn’t you?”
“yeah.”
“Thank you.”
That seemed to startle him. He looked up at you, at your face.
“I could’ve been in trouble if you hadn’t done that. Thank you.”
“... ‘s nothing… you’ve been feedin’ me this whole time, givin’ me a place to sleep…” He sniffled. “you’re the first human t-to treat me… like a person. even when i wasn’t.”
You didn’t have much to say to that. You grabbed handfuls of your pants in anger, outraged somebody could do this to anybody , human or monster.
“...’m sorry. i know you probably… w-wanted a dog,” Sans said gently, playing with the fabric of the blanket.
“No- I mean, maybe, but… this is fine, too,” you managed. “Sorry, I just… I’m still kind of in shock right now, if I’m being honest.”
“don’t blame ya. i-if my dog got up on two legs and started talkin’ i’d… probably think i was insane.”
“Well, I don’t actually have any experience with monsters… I just kind of assume now that this is normal?”
Sans shrugged, gathering the blanket further around himself. “for some of us. it ain’t all that common, though.”
You nodded. The shock of “my rescue dog is talking” had faded by that point, and the more you thought, the more your gut twisted. It had been painful enough to think that a dog-monster had been abused as bad as “Tib” had been, but knowing now that he’d been… the whole time…
“Well… there’s a spare bedroom down here, it's a little messy but I can clean it... I can go buy you some clothes and… whatever else you need. I don’t think it’s safe for monsters to roam around, but…”
“ya don’t gotta go through all that trouble,” Sans said. “i can just… turn back into a blaster.”
You waited a moment to see if he was serious before you tilted your head and gave him a look.
“I’m gonna assume that’s what you call yourself when you’re on four legs… but… don’t you get bored?”
Sans laughed. It wasn’t a very passionate chuckle, but he still did it before it tapered off into a sigh.
“yeah.”
“Well, then… I really don’t mind. I’ve got a spare laptop and stuff… and… you can, like, use the remote now…”
“eh, your taste is pretty good, i’m used to it,” Sans said with a tiny smile. It was gone soon enough. He looked over at you with sad sockets. “did you…”
You waited patiently. Sans cast his sockets to the floor for a moment.
“were there any others? like me?”
You frowned. “Not that I know of… they’re still trying to bust the fighting ring in the city, they only found you… do you… know others?”
“my brother,” Sans said. He sounded defeated. “he… got taken at the same time i did. i wanna believe he’s still out there, but…”
“If you know where the main fighting ring is, we can tell the… the police, or the rescue- I can do it anonymously, I don’t think it’s a good idea the rescue finds out you’re, uh…”
Sans nodded. He let out a deep breath.
“okay. yeah, okay. i, uh, don’t wanna be rude, but… i’m pretty tired…”
“Oh! Yeah, uh, I’m sorry,” you said, standing up and offering Sans your hand. He hesitated for a moment before placing his hand in yours. It was odd- they were so small, being all bone… you grasped it delicately and helped him to his feet. He nearly fell down, but with shaking legs he eventually made it.
“You want to sleep on the couch tonight?” you asked, still holding his hand in case he fell again.
“sure,” he said, breathing a little heavy at the exertion. “not sure how i’d handle any distance, i’m a bit wobbly.” He took a step forward, out of the dog bed, and hissed as his knee braced. He all but fell into you, but you were quick to catch him.
“Woah, easy- I gotcha,” you said, trying to calm his immediate panic at being touched. He flailed for a moment before stilling himself. You held him gingerly, helping him to the couch, where he immediately sat with an anxious glance up at you. When he seemed to realize nothing was wrong, he relaxed with a huff.
“You want me to find some clothes, or…?”
“i’ll be okay naked. what’s one more nap?” he said, arranging himself on the sofa. He stretched a little, wincing at the sensation, before laying down more comfortably, blanket drawn about him.
“Right. I’m gonna go look around for some for later, dig out the spare laptop… you just rest, okay?”
“never thought i’d get told to be lazy,” he joked, but it was clear he was exhausted. His sockets closed and he curled up, snuggling into the throw pillow.
You gave him a parting wave before going upstairs.
You were still trying to process everything that had just happened, but you'd do what you could for your new roommate.
Notes:
there will be no beating around the bush, sans is here now
Chapter Text
Sans slept through the night. You kept checking on him, nervous. You weren’t used to other people- er, well… monsters- being in your house. You had never thought about having a roommate, and you had honestly been content living alone. You worked largely from home at a pretty good job, your house wasn’t large but certainly bigger than you needed, and you spent your days however you pleased. Finding out you would be housing somebody was certainly a disturbance to your peace, but… you found that you weren’t upset about it. The reality of the situation had sunk in by the time the sun rose, and you prepared accordingly.
You found the smallest clothes you owned, but would undoubtedly have to find some even smaller next time you went out. Sans couldn’t come with you- you feared what would happen should anybody find out what he really was. Surely the people at the rescue hadn’t known this- they would have told you, they were kind. But the people who ran the fighting ring…
It was haunting to imagine just what had been beaten into the skeleton. You had to fight the emotions that rose in you and convince yourself to just treat Sans like he was- a person- and not try and immediately address what had been done to him in that hell of a place. All of the scars and wounds that had been on him before were still there. He had gouges in his bones and bite marks to boot. His neck and wrists were both scarred, and though you’d only seen a glimpse the night before, it was sickening to think about his situation.
You sat downstairs on your phone and waited for him to wake up. He stirred around ten. The sun rising would have woken him, but you’d drawn the curtains to prevent that from happening. He deserved a good night’s rest.
When the skeleton opened his eyes, shifted a little, and caught sight of you, there was a moment of raw emotion on his face. Of fear- anxiety- it was almost palpable.
“Good morning,” you said softly. It was probably weird to just sit around and wait for him to wake up, but you were too worried about him to care that much. The fear in his eyes lessened after another moment.
“g’mornin,” he said, even softer, unsure.
You smiled at him and stood, trying to ease the coil of pain in your stomach as he flinched from the movement. It seemed that having more energy resulted in him being more skittish than last night. All you did was walk to the window and open the curtains a little, letting the sun peak in.
“I’m gonna be in the kitchen making some food, you can come join me when you’re ready, alright?” you asked, trying to be as accommodating as possible. Sans nodded, eyeing the clothes that were sitting on the foot table in front of him.
You did as you said. Scrambled eggs and bacon seemed as good a breakfast as any- you were just plating them, about fifteen minutes later, when you heard a rattle of bones and a choked curse from the living room.
You slammed the pan down and ran in, heart racing-
Sans was on the floor beside the couch, breathing hard. He was dressed but curled back into a ball, holding himself.
“Hey, woah- what happened? What’s wrong?” you asked, getting down on your knees beside him, hands hovering nervously above his now-covered bones.
“n-nothin’. ‘m fine,” he all but whimpered. “just… fell a little.”
“Sans, deep breaths. You’re breathing really fast.”
“sorry. ‘m sorry,” he said at once. You noticed the tears as you sucked in your own breath.
“It’s okay. Hey, it’s okay… everything’s okay right now. Are you hurt?” you asked.
“...no. no, i’m…”
He trailed off. Heels of his hands pressed to his sockets, he let out a sad little laugh.
“can’t walk.”
You scolded yourself at once for trying to make him do so.
“Oh, jeez… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed you’d be okay walking to the kitchen, do you need help up?”
Sans said nothing. He didn’t even move.
“Sans…?”
“don’t touch me,” he whined. “please.”
“I… I won’t,” you said, heart beating. “I won’t.”
You sat there for a minute longer, completely at a loss as Sans shook on the floor, rattling against it. You thought about getting up and leaving, but would that scare him?
Sans calmed after a while. He glanced up at you, sockets full of fear and uncertainty. You pretended not to notice the stray tears.
“Do you want help back to the couch?” you asked softly. “It’s totally okay to say no, uhm… I just don’t want you to hurt yourself, but we can wait, too?”
Sans flinched a little, heaving himself into a sitting position. He eyed the aforementioned pieces of furniture, and then he directed his gaze back to you.
He was searching for something. He had to have been. You felt scrutinized under his gaze, like he was reading your soul. You waited.
He nodded and meekly reached for you.
You stood, reached down, and helped Sans back to the couch, trying not to touch him more than was necessary.
You went and got him his breakfast. He was staring at the hardwood floor beneath his two naked, skeletal feet. You sat the food down on the table before him before taking a seat in a nearby armchair.
You didn’t know how to proceed. You looked up at him, still staring at the floor. You anxiously twiddled your thumbs for a while before taking in a deep breath.
“Uhm… Sans…” you began.
“sorry for that little uh. outburst.” He probably didn’t think you’d see, but his hands tightened into fists in his lap. He was so small. The shirt he wore was just big enough to slip partially over his shoulder, revealing a large crack there.
“No, no, it’s… it’s okay,” you stammered. “I don’t blame you for not wanting to be, uh… touched, or anything like that.”
Sans turned his head away.
“I, uh… if… if you ever want to talk about… anything,” you said lamely, “I’m here.”
Sans turned his head back to you, a little more light in his sockets.
“you like anime?”
You blinked. You were thrown for a loop, maybe a few, by his question. Your silence must have been deafening as Sans’s mouth inched into a small smile.
“c’mon, i’m trying to be nice. ya don’t have to look at me like i’m a dog with three legs- if i’m gonna be livin’ here, we should get to know each other, yeah?”
You perked up. “Oh- oh yeah. That’s… a good idea, sorry, I didn’t mean to… uhm…”
“s’all good,” he said. It was easy to see he didn’t want to talk about the specifics of how he’d wound up in your home. “how ‘bout this- i eat this breakfast you made me, and you tell me about that anime with the volleyballs that you only watched a couple episodes of?”
You blushed for a while, remembering quite suddenly that he’d been here, had seen you at your ‘I thought I was alone’ and that he knew far more about you than you did about him.
“Well, uh… I mean, I liked it well enough, I think the protagonist is relatable and-”
Sans ate quietly as you stammered through your anime review.
An hour later, things had settled.
“so you’re tellin’ me the old woman’s power is turning into a motorcycle? and her daughter just… rides her around?”
You nodded. “I haven’t watched past that point yet. Good anime, though.”
Sans nodded, sipping at the drink you’d got for him. He was sitting back on the couch, looking at least partially relaxed. You looked at his legs for a moment before you made a noise.
“Do you think they’re just sore?”
“huh?”
“Oh, uh, your legs,” you clarified. “Like, should I look into a wheelchair or-”
“nah, they’ll be fine, i was just… not using them like this for a long time,” Sans said. You were about to ask how long before he shook his head. “i’ll just live on the couch.”
“You sure? I'll work on getting the guest bedroom cleaned and... bedroomed, but you could stay in my room- oh… well, until your legs are stronger I guess down here works,” you said, slapping yourself. He couldn’t walk up the stairs.
Sans nodded. He seemed lost in thought for a long while before he sat his tea down and looked at you again with those searching eyes.
“you’re sure it’s cool that i stay here?”
“Well, yeah- where else would you go?”
“i mean… nowhere. but that’s not your problem, you didn’t sign up for this.” He seemed very interested in staring side-long at the wall.
You leaned forward and put your hands together. “I mean… no. You’re right, I didn’t, but… that isn’t to say I don’t care about you. I know it… isn’t the same, and I probably did a lot of things to piss you off when you were, uh… on all fours… but I still care about what happens to you.” You looked up at him. “It’s still, like… you.”
Sans laughed a little, but his soul wasn’t in it. He paused before nodding.
“okay. can’t argue with that.”
“We’ll just… we’ll take this one step at a time,” you said, hoping to convey that you didn’t blame him for anything. “I’ll get you that laptop later, and some clothes that fit better, uh… might take some time, but a bed for the room down here... whatever else you think you need. And- and you said before about the fighting ring, and calling in the location- did you still want to do that?”
“yeah.” He looked sad. He also looked tired despite his recent sleep.
“We can do that. First thing, though, you need some rest.”
Sans looked up at you, a bit of surprise in his eyes.
“whuh? i’m fine, though.”
“It’ll help your legs heal… maybe you can do some stretches and work them later, but… I think some sleep is a good idea.”
Sans sighed. “yeah, okay… a nap does sound pretty good right now,” he relented.
You smiled.
Notes:
what the dog doin
Chapter Text
Sans napped for a while. You were glad, because your old laptop needed a bit of updating and clean-up, but after an hour it was running just fine. Maybe it was weird for your first concern to be getting him some kind of technology, but you knew you wouldn’t want to be out of the loop, so. You made a list of the things he might need and a list of things to ask him about. You were taking stock of the food in your house when you heard the monster stir and yawn.
You gave him a few minutes to wake up, making enough noise to let him know you were there, before you headed in.
He was rubbing the sleep from his eyesockets. He yawned again as you came and sat in the armchair nearby.
“Good afternoon. You were out for a few hours,” you said.
“figured… these old bones were tired,” he replied. He stretched his arms, wincing, before swinging the blanket off of himself to start stretching his legs, too.
It was extremely weird to watch a human skeleton stretching, uh, bones, but you didn’t really question it. You figured some form of magic was holding him together- maybe that was what needed stretching.
“So… how old are you?” you asked, curious.
Sans huffed in amusement. “eh, not that old. thirty two. my bro is a whole twelve years younger than i am- he never left me alone, callin’ me ‘old timer’ and a ‘senior citizen’... heh.”
You nodded, a little sad. You hoped the two of you could find Sans’s brother. The skeleton finished stretching with a sigh, leaning back against the arm of the couch.
“I had a couple of things I wanted to ask, about, uhm… what sort of food you eat, hygiene, stuff like that.”
“hit me.”
When it was time for you to go, Sans seemed antsy. He wasn’t the only one.
“You sure you’ll be alright here by yourself?” you asked, pulling on your jacket and stuffing the list the two of you had made into your pocket.
“sure. always am.”
“Mm… okay, but if you need anything, you can use the laptop to message me, I should have internet and stuff the whole way.”
“sounds good.”
“Alright… I’ll be back soon. If anyone comes knocking just pretend you aren’t home- I’ll lock the doors.”
Sans gave a little salute.
You nodded and then you were off.
The shopping trip didn’t take long. You picked up some clothes that would fit the skeleton- mostly in kid’s sizes- some food for him based on the preferences he’d given, and a toothbrush. Nothing too extreme.
You came home and found Sans right where you’d left him, watching TV, rubbing his legs.
He laughed at the shirts you’d bought but insisted they were great, that he liked them unironically, but you had your doubts. Still, it was good to see him laugh as you pulled out a kids shirt with a rubber ducky on it and handed it to him.
You let him know that the food was in the kitchen, and he just had to ask you to make him something- you’d bought lots of little snacks for him to have near the couch for when you were out of the house.
Finally, by the time it was all over, it was almost four in the afternoon. You let out a big breath and pulled out your cell phone.
“Do you want to call about the ring?”
Sans, although nervous, relayed the information to you. He remembered the location pretty well, and the names of some of the people involved, though they might have been fake. He left out any details about himself and what he’d gone through. You wrote it all down, double checked with him, and then called. It didn’t take long- there wasn’t a lot of information, but you hoped it would be enough.
You hung up and sighed. Sans did, too. He seemed pretty shaken up, so you pulled yourself together and gave him a smile.
“Okay, well, hopefully they can do something about that place soon. In the meantime- it’s getting close to dinner time, what do you think we should have?”
Sans shrugged, but seemed to pull out of himself a little bit.
“i dunno. what are the options?”
“Well, we have stuff here to make food, there’s a pizza place that delivers not too far-”
You noticed Sans perk up at that. You gave him a coy smile, which was enough to make him blush and lean back against the couch, obviously trying to play it cool.
“pizza’s good”
“Alright, let’s look at the menu and pick something both of us like.”
And so things went on. It was different having Sans around, but not unpleasant. In the week following the call, he became a bit more adjusted to having to speak. You didn’t know him before everything had happened, so you couldn’t say for sure, but he seemed unsure of himself. He’d try to joke or laugh something off, only for a deep, hollow look to take over. Every time he would ask you something or let slip a plea or a weakness, he would apologize later. Even if his offense was just flinching, he’d say sorry and make a half-hearted attempt at a joke to cover it up. It made you feel awkward and sad, but you didn’t know how to deal with the situation and you certainly didn’t know him well enough to start figuring it out.
But mostly, Sans just slept. You had assumed that he slept so much before because he didn’t have anything else to do, but it was obvious he was tired. You hadn’t quite worked up the courage to ask why or if it was normal. Maybe it was a good sign that he slept deeper with every passing day, no longer starting awake when you laughed at something on your phone or sat a glass of water on the table for him.
Part of you wanted to believe that he’d always been a little skittish, maybe even shy, because the alternative left you feeling cold. When he absently rubbed the scars on his wrists, staring at the wall or the floor, you had to look away and busy your mind elsewhere.
There was radio static about the ring. You heard nothing about it on the news, and there was nothing online except a few older stories, back from the first time one of the participants had been caught… shortly before Sans had come into your life.
Though Sans was worried, he at least had a chance to settle in. You learned about him- about monsters, about his life underground, about his brother- and he learned about you.
“You sure you wanna try?” you asked, standing beside the skeleton but far enough away to keep him from getting spooked. He had his arms braced on the arm of the couch, attempting to use his legs.
He nodded. You bit your lip as he tried to haul himself up, only for his legs to start shaking. He gave up before he’d gotten far, falling back to the couch with a huff.
“damn.”
“I- uhm…” you began. You could tell he was frustrated. You didn’t want to push him, but…
“If you want, I can… y’know, give you a hand. It might be easier to get back into it if you have something to lean on… if you’re okay with it. No pressure.”
Sans didn’t look at you for a moment. He didn’t seem like the type to say it, but you could tell he was scared. Of you. You didn’t blame him. When he raised his skull, he gave you a nod.
“okay. yeah. just…” he faltered and didn’t finish his sentence, looking away. You noticed the way his hands curled into the fabric of his shorts.
“I’ll only do as much as you need me to.” You rubbed your arm. “I won’t hurt you.”
He didn’t react to that. It felt awkward to say it, but you wanted to get it out there. Even if he was older than you and was trying very hard to act okay, he was still clearly traumatized by what he’d been through. You didn’t have experience with this kind of thing, though, so the words felt silly on your tongue.
He sighed and offered you his hand, giving you a very forced smile. You returned it as best you could and took it, coming closer to his side. It was so strange to feel every individual bone in his hand- it felt like, if you squeezed hard enough, they’d break. They were delicate, so you were careful. He weighed very little, so with your help and what small amount of strength remained in his legs, he got to his feet.
“Hey, there we go!” you said, still supporting him. His legs wobbled a bit, but he seemed pretty happy, judging by his grin growing more sincere. He was mostly facing you, so when he tried to take a step and stumbled, you caught his other hand.
“Woah, easy- you good?” you asked. He shivered but nodded, looking at his feet.
“they sure are takin’ their time to heel ,” he said. You huffed in amusement.
“Well, I’m sure they’ll get there. Just takes time.”
Sans nodded, taking another step. With both of his hands, you were able to help him through the movement, taking a step back yourself. He seemed happy with that, looking up and giving you a smile.
The two of you waddled awkwardly around the living room, Sans’s movements becoming more sure and less strained as he worked out the disuse from his bones. Your palms started to get sweaty along with the skeleton’s forehead, so you helped pilot him back to the couch to sit down. He immediately laid back with a sigh. You sat beside him.
“phew. that was a workout,” he said, head leaned back and sockets shut.
“You did great,” you said. “You were getting pretty good there at the end- maybe with a couple more days you’ll be up to walking again.”
He hummed. “hopefully. thanks for the help.”
“Not a problem. I’d say it was a workout for me, but… you weigh like 30 pounds.”
Sans chuckled. “nothin’ like constant stress and not eating to make ya lose weight.”
You frowned, regretful of your words. You looked down at your feet for a few moments, but before your brain could figure out a way to respond, Sans sighed.
“sorry. didn’t mean to be a downer.”
“No no, it’s okay, uhm… sorry. I didn’t know you used to weigh more, I guess.”
“yeah… when us skeletons get to have enough magic, we can form bodies sort of like yours out of it. it’s kind of like an insulator, or a comfort thing- just something we can do if we want to. i always had mine formed before…” Sans broke off. You chanced a look over at him. He was staring at the ceiling.
“I’m sorry…” you said softly.
Sans didn’t reply. You stared at your feet, shuffling them around for a while. When you worked up the nerve to look at him again, he’d leaned forward, elbows on his knees and skull in his hands. You saw the scars on his wrists- all around. From cuffs or shackles, most likely.
“Hey, Sans…” you said quietly. He looked over at you. He wasn’t quite crying yet, but he seemed close.
You were going to say something. You were definitely going to come up with something to say that would make him feel better, or at the very least excuse yourself to give him some privacy, but before you could think of what to do he scooted towards you and leaned his head against your shoulder, movements tense.
You didn’t breathe for a moment. You tried to scold yourself, tried to tell your brain that this was normal, there was no reason to feel so… so much . This wasn’t Tib, it wasn’t some breakthrough moment for a rescue dog to ‘trust’ you, but…
“thanks,” he whispered. He was shaking. You had no idea what was going through his mind or why he was touching you when it was clearly the last thing he wanted to do, so you just took a deep breath and brought your arm around, embracing him from the side, holding his shoulder so you could squeeze it against yours a little.
It lasted for only a few moments before you heard him snoring.
Notes:
i've seen some people say that they want absolutely no flavor at all to their reader inserts, so they can TRULY do an insert, but for me i kind of just see them as a vague concept of a character so i kinda like when they have some personality, a bit of sauce. some would argue "well at that point just make it an oc" but to that i'd say...... yeah maybe LOL but i'm not going to <3 what are y'alls thoughts on that?
anyways thanks for reading!! <3
Chapter 5
Notes:
bit of a short one here, but hope you like the morsel!
Chapter Text
It didn’t storm too much where you lived, but this one was a doozy.
You stood at the window, looking out into the back yard. The sky was dark despite it being only three in the afternoon, the rain falling heavy against the grass and the leaves of the big oak tree behind your house.
You were always a bit partial to the rain, even if the sudden cracks of thunder made you jump sometimes. It was a soothing noise, and the world always looked a little bit cleaner when it was done.
Sans had wrapped himself in a blanket, only his little round skull poking out. He nervously watched you from the couch, having been there since the storm began a few minutes prior.
“ya know, the rain is cool ‘n all but i don’t think standing that close is a good idea,” he said, only for a rumble of thunder to cut him off.
You turned back to look at him, noticing the worry in his sockets and the beads of sweat on his head. You came back and sat down in one of the arm chairs nearby.
“It’s fine- it’s not too bad, and any lightning that strikes will probably just hit the oak tree.”
Sans gave you a look. “and you know that because…?”
You raised an eyebrow. “Uh, it’s lightning; it almost always hits the tallest thing around, and the tree is significantly taller than the house.”
Sans looked at you for a moment, his dark sockets still worried, but now also… curious? He looked over at the window.
“Have you never seen a storm before?”
“i’ve heard them,” Sans offered, still looking at the rain. “we didn’t get a lot of this whole ‘weather’ stuff down underground, except for what trickled through the rocks.”
“Oh, huh… I guess I didn’t think about that,” you said, turning to look at the window yourself. The rain was hitting the edge of the covered porch. “It’s really not that dangerous, though. The most that usually happens is-”
Your words were cut off as the two of you were suddenly plunged into a dim darkness, illuminated only by what dingy light made it through the clouds and into your windows.
“...the power.”
“what happened?” Sans asked, looking around. It wasn’t dark enough to not be able to see, but the sudden lack of electricity humming was strange.
“The power went out. It happens- it should come back on soon,” you said as you got up to walk to the kitchen. “You guys never lost power down there?”
“pretty much never, and when it did, you knew somethin' bit was happening” Sans said, looking out of the window. “we had a heat-based generator that powered the whole underground.”
“Huh. Sounds better than what we have. One power line goes down and-” you blew a raspberry. Sans huffed in amusement but didn’t look at you, still observing the storm. You let him be and went to grab some light.
Candles in hand, you returned to see Sans out of his blanket cocoon and standing a few feet from the window, using the chair as a brace. His legs had been healing well, and he was able to walk with only a bit of help from the walls and furniture.
You sat the candles and the lighter down on the coffee table, watching him with interest. He stared at the rain for a while, a bit transfixed.
“We can go sit out on the porch?” you offered, coming up beside him.
He looked up at you, then at the rain, as though weighing the options. Beside him, you could see his sockets filled with a bit of wonder, even if the fear was still present.
“ya sure it’s safe?”
“I’m sure. I do it all the time- plenty of people love being out in the rain. I kind of like the smell.”
Sans took a moment to decide, but he held out his hand to you and nodded. You took it and delicately helped him to the back door, opening it and leading him onto the porch.
You only had one chair on the porch, and you let Sans have it. He sat, obviously on edge at the now-louder sounds of the storm and the lack of a wall between him and the rain. You walked closer to the edge of the porch, where the rain was painting the wood a shade darker, and held out your hand to feel the drops. The warmth of summer hadn’t quite left yet, and so the rain itself was warm, too. You leaned against one of the beams supporting the roof and listened to the patter of the drops and the rumbling of far-off thunder.
Sans looked at the sky.
Chapter Text
It was a quiet Tuesday evening. The sun was just about to go down but hadn’t quite made it. You were sitting in your living room, idly scrolling through your phone, while Sans rested on the couch nearby. He was still looking at the TV, but every once in a while he’d doze off, close his eyes, only to jerk awake seconds later and look over to make sure you weren’t watching him. You were, but it was easy to avert your eyes in time and continue observing the display. It was kind of funny.
Your phone began vibrating, which was odd- who would call at seven on a weeknight? The caller ID came up as the rescue you’d gotten Sans from- your heart thumped and you quickly stood, going to the kitchen to not completely disturb the skeleton close beside. Did they have news about the ring? Did they need to see Sans for something?
“Hello?” you answered, more than a little apprehensive.
The voice sounded familiar, though you couldn’t place it. They asked your name, and you confirmed.
“I’m sorry to call so late, this is Becky with Positive Paws. Do you have a moment to speak?”
“Yeah, I can talk,” you said, gulping. You decided to stay in the kitchen- if Sans woke up, there was no reason to hide the conversation from him.
“Well, last month’s check-in showed that you and Tib were doing great- we’re happy he found a forever home with you. We didn’t give you a lot of information at the time, but keeping him away from prying eyes was a big priority of ours- which is why we had you sign the agreement not to post any pictures of him online.”
You had a faint recollection of that, but hadn’t really considered it since then because you hardly posted anywhere, anyways. “I remember that.”
“Right. Well, given how well Tib was during the last wellness check, we’d like to ask you, first, if you would be interested in fostering another monster?”
You looked over and saw that Sans’s head had groggily risen, looking at you. Your expression must have said a lot, because his eye sockets creased in worry. Becky continued:
“We understand if you’re not able to, but this monster is the same species as Tib. We don’t know much about monsters or their biology, but they could be related, and since they bond through magic it's likely they would remember. And even if they don’t, forming a bond with another of their kind might help with Tib’s ongoing depression. For these reasons, we wanted to reach out and ask if you would be interested and able to house another rescue.”
“No, uh, yeah, I’m definitely interested,” you said, trying to keep your voice even. “I have plenty of space, and since I’m already mostly remote with my work it would be easy to make sure they both get the attention they deserve.” You felt bad saying the things you were saying, but Sans was staring at you with wide sockets full of desperate confusion.
“That’s exactly what we were thinking. I know it’s last minute, but another check-in with Tib would be necessary before we can introduce this new rescue- we’ve been calling him Rib. He’s touch averse and clearly abused, as with Tib, but completely docile and eager to please. We’ve observed no aggressive behavior between him and his handlers or the other dogs, unlike the growling from Tib. Would you be available tomorrow for an hour-long visit?”
“Yes, I’m at home tomorrow, what time?” You had to look away from Sans, his whirlwind of expressions too much of a distraction.
“How does noon sound?”
“Noon would be great.”
“Perfect. Somebody will be out to assess how Tib is doing and what improvement he’s made. I’m sure everything will go well; you’ve been a great rehabber for years and we were ecstatic to hear that you were keeping Tib.”
“Th-thank you, yeah, I do my best.”
“Mm. Alright, I’ll let you get back to your evening, we’ll see you tomorrow at noon. Say hi to Tib for me! Goodnight!”
“Will do, goodnight,” you said, and then Becky hung up and you were left staring at the phone screen.
“they found him?” Sans asked. You blinked and pulled yourself out of it to walk back over to him and sit down on the couch beside.
“I… don’t know if it’s him , but they said he’s the same ‘species’ and-”
“th-that’s him,” Sans said quietly, bunching his fists in his shorts. “only other skeleton i ever knew.”
You looked at the way Sans’s fingers dug into the fabric, the way they shook. You gave him a moment before you started talking, trying to be gentle.
“They’re coming to see how you’re doing tomorrow… and from there, it sounds like they want to have me take him.”
Sans took a few slow, deep breaths. He was worked up, that much was evident.
“i’ll have to turn back.”
You didn’t respond, just sat your phone on the arm of the couch. Sans continued to fist the fabric of his pants and the nearby blanket he’d been using, eyes darting, like he was thinking about everything at the same time.
You took a deep breath yourself before offering him your hand.
He blinked and looked down at it, and then at you, clearly confused. You blushed immediately and put it back in your lap, far too awkward and unsure of yourself but wanting so badly to support your friend right now.
“Uh, sorry, I thought maybe it’d help, uh…”
“holding your hand?”
You tittered nervously. “...When you say it like that it sounds unhinged…”
Sans snorted. You were about to melt into the floor when he reached his little bony hand over and took yours.
“thanks. haven’t held a hand since… before. pap was always big on touchy-feely stuff.”
You sighed in relief, scooting a little closer to him. “Tomorrow shouldn’t be too bad… they said it would only be an hour.”
“i can do that,” Sans said, squeezing and releasing your hand a few times, back to his thoughts. “it’ll tire me out, but i can do that.”
“Are you sure it’ll be okay, like… mentally?”
Sans took a moment to consider it, and then he shrugged.
“whatever i gotta do to see him again.”
“... Yeah. I wish there was a way around it, but if I do anything to try and hide you they might get suspicious.”
Sans squeezed your hand, back to thinking. Offering physical contact was not something you were used to, but when you thought about how long he’d gone without any positive physical contact whatsoever, it made you sad. You would do what you could for him.
“Maybe… maybe it’d help to think about it like you’re playing a character or something?” you offered. “You’re an aspiring actor taking any job you can get, and this one is a bit weird.”
Sans hummed, glancing over at you. “i appreciate it, but i don’t think there’s much that can make this better.”
“Right, sorry,” you said. Sans withdrew his hand- you felt a pang of guilt for your words until he once again inched closer to you and rested his head on your shoulder, taking it again from his new position.
“You okay? Well- I mean, as okay as somebody could be?” you asked. You weren’t used to this sort of physical intimacy, so it was a bit unnerving. It was embarrassing, for some reason, but you wanted to be there for him. It definitely wasn’t because it was nice and you were touch starved.
“wonder how bad they fucked him up…” he said softly.
You had nothing to say to that. Sans was warm against you; not as warm as a human would be, but still. It was easy to notice him shaking and even easier to notice how he turned his head into your shirt to hide his tears.
You were helpless in his sadness. You were still trying to think of something, anything at all, to say to him when he spoke into your shoulder.
“humans have a lot more… a lot more in them than monsters do,” Sans said. You were looking down at him but he wouldn’t meet your eyes. “you guys have strong souls and it’s really all about the intent behind what you do. doubt you know much about us, but i can feel that intent from you.” Sans let out a breath, slumping even further against your side. “it feels nice. it feels like a big, all-over hug just to sit next to you.”
“I didn’t know that,” you said softly.
“so when they’d hurt me, it… it was-” Sans broke himself off. He was shivering. He took a few wobbly breaths. “i didn’t expect to get out. i… i don’t know if i wanted to get out.” He sniffled. “i wanted to stop hurting, but this, being here, thinking about it, it’s so much. and thinkin’ about it all happening to papyrus-”
He was working himself up. When he broke off again, you awkwardly nuzzled your head into his, not really sure how you’d accomplish it with your hands- or your words for that matter. You opened your mouth to say something when he finally looked up.
His sockets were bagged and he looked so, so tired. Tears ran down his face, which was flushed a bit blue. He was incredibly foreign- just a skeleton brought to life by magic- and you thought your heart would break when you thought about what had been done to him.
“c-can i have a hug?” he asked, almost whimpered. He looked away again and shrank into himself, a sad and forced smile on his face. “sorry i’m a little pathetic right now, guess i’m… i’m just…” If he was trying to think of a joke, he didn’t get there.
“You’re not pathetic,” you replied. You moved away from him, and the immediate worry in his features made your chest hurt. You leaned against the back of the couch, snug in the corner, and patted the cushion beside you.
You were expecting another side hug, but Sans crawled at once into your lap and curled up against you, skull laid over your heart. He was shaking like a leaf, thin bones rattling and shallow breath labored. You were surprised, but didn’t question him. He was the height of your average ten year old, so cradling him wasn’t much of an issue.
It seemed like he really, really needed this, and you were happy to give him whatever comfort you could provide, even if you didn’t understand. You didn’t try to say anything else- apparently your soul could do the talking. You knew of souls and you knew you had one, but that was about it. If the intent of it could help him, you poured all you had into it. Maybe his soul-battery was dead and needed to be recharged?
You were concerned about the shaking, but it died down after a while as Sans fell asleep. You awkwardly ran a hand along the back of his head, your cheek pressed to the top to find the most comfortable position. If you were squishing him at all, he didn’t seem to mind. He had a long day ahead of him; even if your back would be sore, you let him rest.
Notes:
i've had a rough couple weeks, y'all, but i hope you like this chapter! comments and feedback always appreciated but please don't be mean okay guys, not to play the sympathy card but two of my pets passed away within a week so please don't be mean to me on my undertale fanfiction, i promise it will make me cry (said coping-ly but also, i'm okay guys, its been hard but i'm doin as fine as one can and i can have little a 'making jokes out of serious situations' as a treat)
Chapter 7
Notes:
more of this! wow!
Chapter Text
You stayed on the couch with Sans for a few hours but eventually had to get up and go sleep yourself- he didn’t seem to mind, a little too groggy to do more than grumble as you shifted him into a lying position and tucked him in, patting his skull before departing. His breakdown must have taken a lot out of him.
You slept about half of what you would consider a decent night’s sleep. It was three when you got up and dressed, knowing you wouldn’t be able to sleep any significant amount between now and noon. You stared at yourself in the mirror and the bags under your eyes as you brushed your teeth. It was going to be a long day. In the weeks Sans had been with you, things had grown to be a semblance of normal, but with his brother coming as well… it wasn’t like you would say no to it in any universe, or that you regretted the decision, but it was going to be a lot. It was neither of their faults, and you had no ill-will towards them (maybe the opposite, in fact) but you were bound to be emotionally exhausted. You already kind of were emotionally exhausted.
To keep your anxious mind calm, you brainstormed things to ask Sans before he went back to all fours. You avoided the living areas, not wanting to accidentally wake him up, but around five you did have to sneak into the kitchen and root around as quietly as possible for a snack.
You were shoving a couple of granola bars in your pocket when you heard the tell-tale click of feet on the wooden kitchen floor. You turned and saw Sans standing in the doorway, his blanket drawn around his shoulders.
“Shit, I’m sorry, did I wake you up?” you asked. “I was trying to be quiet.”
“nah, you’re fine. was wondering if i could stay close to you for a while?” he asked, the white ‘pupils’ in his eyes bright compared to the darkness of the room. “bit of a weird request, but it would help me recharge.” He drew the blanket closer, eyes on the floor. “ya don’t have to.”
“Oh no, that’s fine- I don’t mind.” You felt sad at his hesitation. “You wanna come up to my bedroom?”
Sans nodded. He was steady on his feet now, so it felt almost cruel for him to have to turn back. You yoinked a few more snacks and a drink for the road, Sans declining your offer of some fruit snacks before following close behind. You let him take the stairs first so you could catch him if he fell, but it was just one flight and, with the railing as a guide, he made it just fine. He didn’t have much to say as you pointed him to your room and told him to make himself at home, just flopped down on the queen-sized bed with his blanket situated snugly around him.
You smiled at the sight of the small skeleton in his comfortably-wrapped state. You deposited the foodstuffs on the nightstand before sitting beside him, back leaned against the headrest so you could use your laptop and eat. In the time it took you to turn, grab a granola bar, and re-situate, he had wiggled himself close to your side. You couldn’t help the feeling of fondness that grew in your chest, and the urge to give his bald head a pat was irresistible.
He looked up at you. You blushed and took your hand away at once.
“Sorry, was that okay? Your skull looked very smooth and, uh… pat-able. But if you’d rather me not do that, I won’t.”
He lowered his eyes again, expression conflicted.
The silence was a bit awkward. “I mean, seriously, if that was an overstep, y’know…”
Sans sighed. “i mean, i’d be a liar if i said it felt bad, but it also feels… wrong. like i shouldn’t be okay with it, but i am.”
“Which part feels wrong?” you asked. You felt guilty now, but wanted to make up for your error.
“pretty much all of it,” Sans said, but he shrugged under his blanket. “the fact it’s a pat on the head, and the fact i’m okay with you touching me at all. I feel like i should be freaked out by it, but i’m not.”
“Hmm,” you hummed. There was a little sting at his words, but the feeling wasn’t directed at him, and you were quick to dismiss it. “Is it something to do with the, uh… ‘intent’ thing you talked about last night?”
“mm, probably. i know you’re not gonna hurt me, and it feels good to be touched.” he sighed, a hand escaping his covers to rub his face. “i dunno. its probably stupid to get weird about a quick pat when i was crying into your soul last night.”
“It’s not stupid,” you defended him. “That was on your terms, and what I did wasn’t.” You took a moment to think, looking at the snack in your lap. “I won’t say I’m an expert on trauma, or even, like… super knowledgeable, but I don’t want to rush you into anything you’re not ready for. And if only being touched when you want to be touched is included in that, uh, that sounds reasonable to me. You know, the trauma amateur.”
“... ya sure?” he asked, choosing to look at the sheets and not your face. He looked so small and vulnerable laying down and curled around himself, even wrapped up as he was.
“Yeah, of course. If you want a hug or whatever, just tell me, but I won’t touch you apart from that. Unless, like, a boulder is about to fall on you and I have to pull you out of the way or something.”
Sans huffed a small laugh. “okay. thanks for thinking of me in any future boulder-falling events.”
“Sure.” You took a deep breath, not wanting to change the subject to the darker matter quickly approaching but feeling it inevitable. “It’s a little after five right now, and they’re supposed to come at twelve. What time do you want me to wake you up?”
“eight’s good. we can chat more then,” Sans said, snuggling close, skull right beside your hip.
“I can put a pillow on my lap and you can lay there, if being closer helps,” you offered. In the dim lighting of your bedroom, you could see the blue flush of magic to his face even as he nodded.
You did just that, and he shifted to lay his head in your lap, arms resting on your thigh.
“I’ll try not to get any crumbs on you,” you said.
He exhaled in a classic ‘too tired to laugh’ way. “thanks, pal.”
He fell asleep not long after as you (carefully) munched on your snacks and messed around on your phone.
“Okay, so… can you talk when you’re on all fours?” you asked.
Sans was sitting at the kitchen counter, atop the barstool beside you, his feet dangling well above the floor. He was sipping some orange juice. It was nine by the time he got up and dressed and the two of you went downstairs.
“nah.”
You nodded. “Okay. Well, uh… if you need to tell me something, what's a good way to do it?”
“not really sure. can still hold a pen okay,” he said, sliding his cup of orange juice away and resting his chin on the counter. His little skeletal fingers were tapping at the faux marble surface.
“I’ll put a notepad and pen in the bathroom behind the stairs,” you said. “If I see you go in there I’ll know you wrote something.Hopefully they’ll be in and out in no time, but I can’t say anything for sure.”
Sans hummed in agreement. He stared straight ahead, his eyesockets not really focused on anything, it seemed.
“...Is there anything else I can do for you?” you asked. “I know you don’t know what your brother will be like, but is there anything I should do for him? ”
“hard to say,” he said, sitting up and looking at you for a moment before tapping again, attention to the countertop. “i’d avoid touching him… i don’t know how he’ll react to seeing me. i’ll… i’ll try to play it cool.”
“I think it’d be okay if you didn’t, too- they said over the phone that they didn’t know the relation between you, so whatever happens I’m sure they’ll just guess. As long as he doesn’t go for your throat, I doubt they’ll be concerned enough to not leave him with me.”
“he won’t do that,” Sans said, a sad smile touching his face. “he couldn’t hurt a moldsmal.”
There was silence for a few moments. You leaned forward and rested your arms, glancing over at your friend.
“Are you nervous?”
“sure. it's been a while, and a lot’s happened.” He didn’t look at you.
“I’ll try to keep the visit as streamlined as possible. If you and him need space once they leave, I can go upstairs.”
“you don’t have to do that. he might get freaked out knowing a human is here but not being able to see them.”
“Okay… uh, once you turn back for the visit, will you be able to turn back again or will you need to get some strength back?”
Sans shrugged. “i’m not sure. i think i’ll be okay to shift back again, but who knows.”
You nodded. “Do you want me to give you some privacy? We should probably be ready at a quarter till, just in case they get here a little early.”
Sans didn’t respond. His fingers were now fisting his shorts, something he did quite often when he was upset. You didn’t stare, just waited beside him for an answer.
“...if its not too much to ask, i’d like you to stay,” he said, glancing over. “it’s… it’s a little…” he trailed off. His sockets screwed shut a moment, some tears falling. His next words were wet: “not to sound like a babybones, but i’m kinda scared. sorry.”
“I can stay,” you said while your heart hurt. Sans nodded, eyes still closed, and put his hand on the counter close to you with the palm facing upwards.
When he didn’t withdraw it, you gently took his hand in yours. You weren’t used to your hands being larger than anybody’s, but they practically dwarfed his.
“thanks.”
“Of course.”
Half an hour. You and Sans had migrated to the couch, and he was a mess. His skull was beaded with sweat, hands shaking something fierce. He had to turn back sometime in the next fifteen minutes.
You felt terrible. It hurt you to see him so worked up, powerless to help. It was easy to see he’d rather do literally anything else than change back again, but…
“i’ll do it with the clothes on. i can take ‘em off after,” he said.
“That sounds like a plan. I can help if you need it.”
“notebook in the bathroom. i can write something if i gotta.”
“I put a pen and a pencil in- oh, and a crayon I found. Just in case.”
Sans attempted to take a few deep breaths, but faltered. He had begun crying again at some point.
You frowned. “Hey, is it… is it okay if I rub your back? I don’t know what else to do right now, but-”
“yeah,” he all but whimpered. You did so at once, feeling the ridges of his spine through the fabric as you gently moved your hand up and down the back of his ribcage and vertebrae. It was strange, but you were getting used to that.
“I’ll be here the whole time. I won’t let anybody hurt you- or your brother,” you said. The words hadn’t grown any more familiar in the weeks he’d been with you, but it was easier to say when he was so distraught. “The people from the rescue never hurt you, did they?”
“but they could,” he said at once, hands trembling from how tightly they were now grabbing the material of his shorts.
“They won’t. I wouldn’t let them even if they tried.”
Sans looked over at you with his big, scared sockets. He took you in a moment before he sniffled and leaned close to wrap his arms around you in a hug.
You hugged him back as tight as you dared. You held the back of his skull, moving your thumb over it gently until he pulled away again. One deep breath. He looked like he was going to say something for a moment before shaking his head and haltingly sliding to the floor.
It was just like before, maybe a little bit slower. He glowed brightly with white magic, the upside-down heart of his soul visible for just a second before it was done and he was in the space before you again.
You’d moved the coffee table away in preparation. He was lying down and shaking, skeletal paws rubbing at his face, and as you got down beside him, he whined.
“I’m right here. Can you give the floor a tap to let me know you’re okay?”
He looked at you, and it was so strange to see him look like this again. It had honestly felt like ‘Tib’ had died and been replaced by Sans, but it really was just… him. Sans used his claw to tap the floor.
“Okay, cool… need help to the bed?”
He grumbled, heaving himself up. It didn’t seem like he had much trouble adjusting this time; he shimmied himself out of his shorts, needing only a bit of help to get the shirt off before he walked over to the now-unused dog bed at the end of the couch and flopped down. He had the absolute saddest look on his face.
You stood, depositing the clothes in the drawer of the nightstand before walking to the seat beside him and sitting down.
“You good to just hang out there? They’re due to be here in like 20 minutes. Tap for yes?”
Sans tapped.
“You want me to turn on the TV?”
His claws tapped the floor again, eyes averted.
“I’ll put on some light anime,” you said, grabbing the remote and messing with it. You noticed that your hands were shaking a little bit, too. “I know this is really shitty and unfair, and I’m sorry. We’ll… we’ll talk later.”
Sans huffed through his nose. You kind of felt like crying yourself, so you turned your attention to putting on some stupid TV show.
Chapter 8
Notes:
here comes a special boy!
thanks so much to Mossy! your support for my fanfictions means so much to me <3
Chapter Text
You were waiting in the kitchen, occasionally looking out of the window in the dining room adjoined to it to see if anybody had come yet. You felt terribly anxious. Sans was still in the dog bed.
It was two minutes after twelve when the Positive Paws van turned into your short driveway off of the rural road. You gulped.
“They’re here,” you called. Sans didn’t do anything, and you hadn’t expected him to. You busied yourself at the largely disused dining room table, messing on your laptop. You heard two car doors open and then close. About twenty seconds passed before there was a knock at the door.
You took a few steadying breaths before you went over. You put your hand on the doorknob, took a few more, told yourself to play it cool for Sans, and opened it.
“Hello!” Becky greeted you. You remembered her, and the nametag on her pink polo shirt confirmed it. She was a short woman with curly, short brown hair. You got the normal pleasantries out of the way, asking one another how they were, before she went on: “My coworker is in the van with Rib, we’ll bring him in once I check in on Tib if you’re okay with that.”
“Sounds fine to me,” you said, stepping out of the way. “Come on in.”
“Thank you, and thank you for agreeing to another check-in,” Becky said, coming through the doorway and shutting the door behind her. "It's unorthodox, but with such special cases we want to be sure they're going to the right place." She slipped off her shoes, setting her messenger bag beside them. “I know it's a bit of a hassle.”
“Oh, it’s fine, I get it,” you said. Thankfully it was a bit easier now that the interaction was underway. You lead her away from the small entrance and into the dining room.
“I just need to check in on him, it shouldn’t be more than a couple of minutes,” she said, looking around the room. “There’s no doubt the home is fine for him- it’s cleaner than my house, that’s for sure.”
You forced a laugh. “Well, with just me and him, there’s not too much mess.” You were about to turn and call for ‘Tib’ when you saw him out of the corner of your eye, standing in the large, open doorway between the dining room and living room.
“There he is!” Becky said, getting down on one knee and holding out her hand. “C’mon over, buddy!”
The soft, infantilizing tone she took made you a little angry, but you knew she didn’t know any better. You sat down in one of the chairs, pulling it out enough to face them.
Sans walked over and sniffed the offered hand.
Becky smiled. “Do you remember me, bud?”
Sans really was putting in his best effort- he gave a few wags of his boney tail, briefly touching the tip of his muzzle to Becky’s hand before sitting down just out of reach.
“He’s, uh, still pretty shy about being touched,” you said, “but he’s doing well.”
“Oh, he certainly is!” Becky said, tilting her head this way and that to inspect him. “He’s never even touched me before, so that’s already a step in the right direction, and look how well he’s healing!” Becky gave Sans a big smile before she scooted a bit closer and looked at his wrists. “These indents were far deeper than they are now- none of us were sure if they’d heal, given he’s a monster, but they’re filling in alright!” Becky held out her hand again, which Sans hesitantly bumped with his snoot, before the woman pushed herself back up, moving a few steps away from him, standing straight and smiling.
Sans stood and walked over, looking up at you for a moment. You gave him a smile, and he sat himself by your side, but not without first setting his face against your leg for a few moments. He really was putting on a show- you felt horrible, but you were proud of him.
“Ohhh!” Becky cooed. “He really does like you! He never interacted with any of us at the shelter like that- he must trust you a lot.”
You could only smile at her, hoping that the silence was taken as being flustered and not as overwhelmed- the pang of emotion at her words hit you deep. You didn’t look down at Sans.
“Well, I can say with certainty Tib is doing great in your care- shall I go get Rib and we can introduce them?”
“Sure,” you said, putting your all into your own performance. “I’d love to meet him.”
“Oh, he’s sweet, just shy like yours,” Becky said, giving Tib one last smile. “You go ahead and leash Tib just in case there’s any aggression and I’ll be right back with Rib.”
You nodded but cringed. The woman had already walked to the door, so you looked down at Sans. He was looking at the floor.
“I’m sorry about this, dude,” you whispered. He huffed, giving you a look you couldn’t interpret.
The leashes were near the entrance, and you grabbed one and an old collar from another foster dog from some time ago. You winced again as you got on your knees next to Sans, but he stayed still as you clipped the collar around his thin neck and attached the leash.
A handful of moments passed before somebody knocked on the door and Becky’s head poked in. “All ready in there?”
“Yup!” you called back, anxiety pulsing.
The door opened, and Becky walked in first. You could already see some white bone behind her, but as another, taller woman led Rib into the room, you were a little stunned.
The first thing you noticed was how much bigger he was- he must have been nearly twice Sans’s size, head well above Becky’s hips much like a Great Dane or a Mastiff.
The second thing you noticed, the thing that made your stomach flip, was his missing left front leg, only the shortest nub of which remained.
“I know, I know, he’s a lot bigger than Tib, and we have no idea what happened to the poor dear's leg,” Becky said, moving into the room so that the other Positive Paws worker could bring Rib- Papyrus- into the room. He looked around anxiously at the new environment, walking without much issue despite the stump of his left foreleg, looking very similar to Sans, just bigger, before he spotted the aforementioned skeleton sitting beside you.
You were gripping the leash tight. Your eyes dropped to Sans, who had stood up and was looking at his brother with wide eyes.
“You stay there, we’ll bring Rib over,” Becky said softly. The bigger of the two was also staring with wide sockets, but soon he was moving forward, pulling slightly on the lead in an effort to get to Sans.
“Woah, woah, easy,” the other woman, whose name tag read ‘Michelle’, said. Papyrus stopped at once, but his tail was wagging so hard his whole body wobbled.
“That’s a good sign,” Becky said.
Sans also walked closer, and it was just enough for the two of them to make contact. He and Papyrus sniffed one another’s snouts just a moment before Sans nuzzled his skull under his brothers, whimpering.
You let him get a little closer, looking at Michelle to do the same, and once they were able to, the two were nuzzling their heads together, as close as possible, both tails wagging.
“Well I’ll be,” Becky said, smiling. “They definitely get along.”
“They must have known each other, or maybe monsters have some kind of bond. Neither have acted like that with any of the other animals,” Michelle added.
You stared at them a moment longer, feeling guilt and shame but a bittersweet happiness at their reunion. The two were still nuzzling, sitting close together, Sans occasionally nosing at Papyrus’s missing limb and whining.
“Definitely not aggressive,” you chimed in, hoping to move this process along and get the other two out of the house.
“Not at all! Fantastic!” Becky said, clapping her hands. “I think we’re safe to do the paperwork and get this all settled!”
“I agree,” Michelle said, setting the leash connected to Papyrus on the floor. You did the same with Sans’s.
Becky went to her bag, sitting by the front door, and shuffled some stuff around before walking to you, giving the two skeletons a wide berth.
It was a quick process from there. You signed that you were adopting Papyrus, and you signed an agreement to not advertise him or post pictures of him on social media, just as you’d done for his brother. You were provided a care sheet that varied little from the one you'd been given for Sans. The two had shifted to laying down, Sans curled up in the larger curve of Papyrus’s side.
You sped through the goodbyes, indulging a bit of small talk as you lingered around them. You felt a little sick, just sort of standing around while these two had a monumental moment of reconnection. Becky said they’d be calling sometime in the next two weeks about a check in for Rib, and to call if you had any issues.
You waved goodbye until they were out of the driveway before you closed the door. You locked it for some reason, pressing your forehead there for just a few seconds to collect yourself.
And then it was time to unpack.
Chapter 9
Notes:
helloooo sorry this took a hot minute, i'm grappling with a wrist... injury?? ailment? doctor wasn't too sure and its a short wait for an appointment to figure it out, but overall i'm taking it easy and using a keyboard is one of the things that aggravates it the most (cringe). but! here is this!
thanks to mossy once again!!
Chapter Text
You stepped back from the door, composing yourself just a moment longer before you turned to face the skeletons laying on the dining room floor. Even if you'd thought about what you were going to say, everything felt so raw and intense you probably wouldn't remember what you had planned.
Papyrus and Sans were still pressed together, the larger's tail curled up around the smaller, Sans against the curve of his brother and head where his left arm should have been. Sans seemed completely absorbed in just... being there. Papyrus, on the other hand, was looking at you anxiously.
You slowly walked forward, stopping a few feet away to get down on your knees, hands up.
"Uh, so... I know this is probably a lot, and I'm sorry about... well, I guess everything, but..." you trailed off. Papyrus was watching, tail and intact forepaw closing in around Sans as though for protection. You introduced yourself awkwardly, then: "It's, uh... it's nice to meet you, Papyrus."
The skeleton visibly stiffened at his name- his real name- being said out loud. Sans nuzzled his head into the crook of Papyrus's neck before pulling away just enough to change back.
Papyrus looked beyond confused and scared. Sans was back to 'normal' in just a few seconds, and he threw his arms around Papyrus's shoulders, a blubbering mess.
"it's okay- they aren't gonna hurt us, pap," Sans cried. "i'm here. i-i'm here."
You were nothing if not an emotional fool, and you were soon crying yourself. Sans reached up and took his collar off, throwing it to the side before taking Papyrus's off as well.
Sans looked like he was going to say something, but then Papyrus pulled away from him. He looked at the collars on the floor, and then at you, and then at his brother's face. He whined.
Sans was looking at his missing arm.
"I know this is all a lot to take in," you said, making Papyrus's attention snap to you. "I'm...I'm the one who Sans went to when he got rescued from the fighting ring a few months ago. I didn't know about..."
"about us." Sans finished, sitting back on his knees and wiping at his tears. "but when i showed them this," he said, gesturing to his completely naked body, "they were cool. they've been helping me. they want to help you, too..."
Papyrus took another step back, shaking his head. He whimpered. He really was huge, and you hadn't expected it. For some reason, you'd envisioned a little tiny skeleton dog the size of a Chihuahua. In the many things Sans had told you about his younger brother, his substantially larger size hadn't come up.
He was littered with many of the same scars that Sans had, just in different places. The most noticeable of the marks was across his nasal bone, running from the inner corner of his right socket down to the opposite cheek. A chunk was missing from one of his ribs, and a couple of the small ridges along his spine were almost completely gone. He looked rough.
Papyrus whimpered, still looking confused and upset. Sans sniffled, wiping at his tears, before he held his arms open.
"i know this is a lot, i'm sorry... i missed you so much, pap."
Papyrus went to his brother, putting his head against Sans's chest and sitting his body down to be as close as it could. Sans held him and ran his hands soothingly down his neck and spine.
"i'm here. i'm not goin' anywhere. never again"
Papyrus nuzzled closer, Sans pulling him in and wrapping him in as big a hug as the tiny skeleton could manage.
"I'll be in the living room, but you guys take as long as you need," you said softly, getting to your feet. Papyrus moved his head enough to keep you in his line of sight as you made your way through the dining room and to the couch. You gave him a slow wave before you were out of his field of view. "You're safe here. I'm, uh, not too good at knowing what to say sometimes, so I might make a fool of myself... uh..." you rubbed your neck, sure you must have been blushing. "Just do what feels comfortable."
"thanks," Sans said, craning his neck to give you a teary smile. Papyrus looked away from you with a small, sad noise.
You took a deep breath and went to sit, far enough that you couldn't see them but close enough that you still felt like an intruder. You rubbed at your face before pulling out your phone to distract your buzzing brain- Sans had requested you stay downstairs to avoid making Papyrus worry, so that's what you would do.
You played on your phone for as long as you could, hearing Sans's soft and comforting words but trying your best not to make out what he was saying. You eventually moved to just laying on the couch and picking at the fabric, and then to the chair nearby, and then to the floor beside the chair nearby. It was only an hour or so, but to your anxious and sad brain it felt like a calendar week.
You were sitting on the floor in front of the couch, back leaning against it and rubbing the carpet with your hands, when you saw the large, open path to the dining room suddenly light up with blue magic. You straightened at once, scrambling to the couch so you wouldn't look like a weirdo petting their living room carpet.
"wow, bro, you did that easy peasy. puts me to shame," Sans said, but there was a sadness to it that made your heart ache.
"I'M SORRY..." a new voice said. It was louder and shriller than Sans's and carried so, so much emotion in it.
"wh... huh? sorry for what, pap?"
"I SHOULD HA-HAVE FOUGHT BACK," Papyrus cried, voice breaking. "WHEN THEY TOOK U-US- I SH-SHOULD HAVE- I- I DIDN'T KNOW- I DIDN'T KNOW-"
"hey, hey, deep breaths, papyrus you gotta breathe bud-"
"I DIDN'T W-WANT- TO- HURT ANYBODY," Papyrus all but wailed, sentences punctuated by sobs. "I DIDN'T KNOW- AND- AND- NOW Y-YOU'RE HURT AND IT'S... IT'S M-MY FAULT-"
"this is not your fault. nothing that happened is your fault, we had no fuckin' clue what they were going to do with us. don't you dare blame yourself," Sans said, angry and sad and hurting.
Papyrus cried. You gripped the edge of the couch so hard that your fingers hurt, feeling too much all at once. There was a moment of silence.
"... does it hurt?"
"N-NO... NOT NOW..."
"i'm so sorry."
"NO PLEASE DON'T SAY THAT. WHERE IS THE... The Human?" Papyrus lowered his voice enough that you could barely hear it at the end. Your chest tightened.
"i told them to stay down here so you wouldn't worry- probably in the living room. oh- oh, hey, duh, we got you clothes- wait right here and i'll go get-"
"DON'T LEAVE." the pain and panic made fresh tears come to your eyes, and you sniffled.
"okay. okay, i'll stay right here beside ya, pap. you wanna come with me? they'll see you naked. not that they haven't seen me naked. or that they care. i hope. humans got skeletons in them but i don't think they're too offended by seeing bones. unless we're talking about one particular-"
"S-STOP. EW," Papyrus said, and it was the first thing that wasn't drenched in sadness.
"ha, i knew that'd get a rise outta ya." You wrinkled your own nose at the nasty pun.
"EWW!" Papyrus repeated, and Sans huffed out a laugh.
"c'mon, they're hearing all of this anyways. lets go say hi."
"THEY... THEY'RE- They Aren't Like...?"
"fuck no, they've been nothin but nice to me. a real all-around pal of a human, kinda like the kid but, y'know... not a kid. i'll be right here the whole time."
"OKAY. OKAY. JUST, UHM..."
"i gotcha. i won't let you go."
You took a deep breath, feeling a lot of emotions all at once, none of which were confidence. But you were here, and you had to do this, so you braced yourself to meet Papyrus on two feet.
Chapter 10
Notes:
I downloaded this writing software for people with ADHD and it isn't the most robust writing tool in the world but that's honestly a blessing because it doesn't autocorrect my lowercase sentences. it must have been made specifically for writing in sans undertale language, probably
another thank you to mossy!
Chapter Text
Papyrus and Sans appeared in the doorway, the taller using his brother as a crutch as he hobbled. He didn't seem nearly as impaired as Sans had been.
"hey," Sans greeted you, waving. Papyrus, shaking, had his narrow sockets locked on the floor.
"Hi- here, I'll vacate the couch, if you'd like to sit down." You tried not to stare at Papyrus, but it was very strange to see a naked skeleton just... there. Standing in your home. Very tall- god, he was over 6 feet and then some, you'd guess.
"i think that'd be good- not sure how good pap's legs are for the stairs, it might be a couch kinda night," Sans said, looking up at his brother. Papyrus glanced at him, and then at you, but didn't do anything else. Your heart hurt, but you pressed on.
"I kinda figured that would be the case. I'll go grab some extra sleeping stuff- oh, uh..." you trailed off, looking at the newcomer to your home.
He tensed. You noticed and held up your hands.
"Sorry, sorry- didn't mean to dramatically pause, I just don't know if my clothes are going to fit you like we planned... somebody didn't tell me you were a skyscraper," you said, giving Sans a look.
He was clearly sad, worn out, and emotionally drained, but he still smiled.
"everybody looks tall to me, i think the clothes’ll be fine for a while. my bro doesn't have nearly as much flesh as you."
"Gross, I hope he doesn't have any at all," you said, stepping well out of their way. Papyrus raised his head just a little bit to look at you- it was hard to read him, but he seemed... curious. In a very sad way. The new angle gave you a good view of the large and unsightly scar going from the corner of his eye to his opposite jaw, across his nasal bone. You gave him a smile.
"Okay, well, I hope you like crop tops," you said. Papyrus's jaw parted just a bit, like he was about to reply to you... then he grabbed Sans a little tighter with his single remaining arm and closed it again.
You knew he was just scared, and nervous, but it still made you quite sad. Sans gave you a smile much the same and you went upstairs.
You had a sleeping bag from some point in your life, and an old twin-sized mattress topper from another. You dug them out of your closet, along with a blanket and a pillow, and sat all of your findings on your bed.
They probably needed a few minutes, so you sat down. You put your head in your hands and took a few deep breaths.
Papyrus was... a lot. The height threw you off, and somewhere deep down that you didn't want to acknowledge, it also scared you. You were certain, logically, he would never hurt you. He probably weighed a quarter of what you did and was missing an arm. And yet, there was something about a 6'4 walking skeleton that made your silly ape brain unsettled. It was probably all of the horror movies you'd seen as a teenager.
The arm... you shivered. You were certain now that Sans was used to a Papyrus that had two of them. That meant that whoever had been so unspeakably cruel to him had also gone the extra mile and taken a limb off. If he was also in the dog-fighting ring, like Sans, it could have been a dog. But was that really any better? The stub of his humerus was still there- this wasn't a pop-it-off kind of scenario. A dog could lose a limb like that and not experience a huge change in behavior and ability. A person who was used to having two arms, though... Papyrus was probably going to need help adjusting. You were almost certain that he wouldn't want you to be one of the ones to help him.
You sighed. Well. He was here, and you wouldn't change that even if you could. It was a bittersweet kind of stress. Maybe things would look better once he had clothes on.
You stood, stretched, and gave yourself a mental pep-talk before you grabbed the nesting materials and made your way back down, letting your feet fall heavier than usual so they knew you were coming.
When you came in, Papyrus was sitting on the couch with your old clothes on with Sans beside him. You smiled, fear completely dissipating at the sight before you as you sat the bed-things down on the coffee table, still pushed out of the way.
"see? perfect fit," Sans said, gesturing to his brother. Papyrus had his hand in his lap, shuffling his feet.
"I don't know what you guys usually dress like, but those clothes do not fit him," you said, sitting down on the floor in front of the coffee table, angled to be facing them. The clothes were way too small. "I mean, they'll be fine for now as long as you aren't uncomfortable, but sometime in the future I'll get your measurements and go get you proper clothes that don't look like they shrank in the wash five times over."
Papyrus blushed, hand fiddling in his lap. He seemed very uncertain and awkward, and Sans definitely picked up on it, too.
"papyrus, you can talk to them, y'know. they don't bite. most they do is drool in their sleep sometimes."
"It's okay!" you said, holding your hands up as Papyrus looked at his brother and then at you. "Drool aside, it's fine if you don't want to talk much right now, I get it. I'm not offended or anything."
"I..."
You took in the syllable and waited patiently for him to continue. He took a deep breath, grabbing Sans's hand.
"I'm... Sorry. For Being So Scared," Papyrus said. He didn't look at you, but the carpet. "Thank You For- For The Clothes."
"pap..." Sans said softly, squeezing his hand tighter.
"Hey, really honestly and truly, you never have to be sorry for being scared," you said. Papyrus, in his red sleeveless crop top and a pair of gray sweatpants that only made it to his calves, glanced at you with tears threatening to leave his sockets. "I know you and Sans both went through a lot of stuff that I won't ever understand, and I'm not going to judge you for being hesitant around me. I'm, uh, just glad that you're here now." You rubbed the back of your neck, still getting accustomed to this open talk.
Papyrus nodded, the tears spilling over. Sans leaned into his side, still holding his hand.
"you must be pretty tired," Sans said. "you wanna lay down for a while?"
Papyrus nodded. He paused and looked at you, and then away again. Then back at you. Once more away.
"you wanna ask something?" Sans coaxed, observing the behavior, too.
"Uhm Well... Just... If You Have Any F-Food I Could..." Papyrus trailed off, flushed, taking his hand away from Sans's long enough to wipe his tears before replacing it.
"Of course!" you said, smiling and pushing yourself to your feet. "Any requests? If I don't have it today I'll go get it soon."
"As Long As It Isn't D... Dog Food," he squeaked. "Please?"
Ignoring how much that hurt, you gave him a thumbs up. "I'll whip something up real quick. How about some..." you trailed off, thinking. "Oatmeal?"
"OH, YES, PLEASE," he said, much more force in his voice. You smiled.
"Sans?"
"can i get some oatmeal, too?" he asked, snuggled into Papyrus's side. It was nice to see him happy, even if the situation fucking sucked.
"Two oatmeals, coming right up! Oh- I mean, I just have like pre-made packets, but they're good."
Sans gave you a lazy salute and Papyrus nodded, still sheepish, but at least you knew that a route to his heart was through his non-existent stomach.
You went to the kitchen, feeling a little bit better about everything now that you had a task. You’d make Papyrus the best damn pre-made oatmeal from a box that had ever existed.
Chapter 11
Notes:
i got a couple nice comments and it made me remember this fic exists. lo and behold, turns out I had this chapter almost completely done and just... never got there. So I got there! have some more!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Papyrus slept after he ate his oatmeal and a healthy amount of his brother's on top of that. You gave him space where you could.
You sat at the kitchen counter, making a list on your phone of things you needed to get done. It was mostly clothes and food, but you'd have to talk to Papyrus about what he'd need going forward. Hopefully you’d talk to him- he didn’t seem jazzed about the idea. You couldn’t blame him.
Sans came into the kitchen, wiping his face as he crawled into the seat beside you. He looked exhausted.
"Is he sleeping?" you asked, keeping your voice down.
"yeah, he's out like a light. haven't seen him fall asleep that fast since he was in stripes."
You recalled that tidbit of monster culture Sans had told you. "I don't mean to be rude, I just want to confirm that he... didn't have a missing arm last time you-"
"no." Sans was staring straight forward, eyes locked on something and burning with tired rage. "he had two."
"... I'm so sorry."
"i don't get it," Sans said, putting his head in his hands. "i don't understand how anybody could hurt him that bad. how much h-he must have-" Sans choked on his words as his shoulders began to shake.
You made a noise in recognition of his words, but you had nothing to add. You didn't understand, either.
"Can I give you a hug?" you asked gently.
Sans nodded. You slid out of your chair and met him in his, wrapping your arms around him. He returned the embrace.
He stayed like that for a while. You held him, thinking about how much he must have been feeling, how much anger and sadness and pain.
"You did really well today," you said, hoping to cheer him up even a little bit. "I know it really sucked, and you shouldn't have had to do any of it, but you were great."
"thanks, pal," Sans said, pulling away and wiping at his tears. "you did pretty good, too."
You shuddered. "I did what I had to, but you had it a lot worse than I did. I'm sorry for... the stuff I said."
"hey, no worries- i know you were playing that up-and-coming actor trying out for a weird role, no hard feelings," he said with a smile, quickly overtaken by a yawn.
"Jeez, why don't you go nap with your brother? You look about ready to fall over."
"mm... sounds pretty nice, honestly," Sans said, wiping at the residual tears his yawn had caused. "you don't mind?"
"No, not at all. To be honest I might go upstairs and take one myself, dude."
"well, in that case i don't feel bad. just..." he trailed off, gripping onto the edge of his seat.
"Yeah?"
Sans took a deep breath to steady himself. "just go easy on him. i had a long time to get used to you before i had to talk, but he got thrown into this pretty suddenly... he might need some time."
"He can take all the time he needs, I get it," you said. "He didn't get to see me lounging on the couch in my underwear with a bag of chips on my stomach while I watched cartoons. Which I still hate thinking about, but, y’know.."
"i tried to look away as much as i could," Sans said with a coy smile.
You sat in the living room with a notebook and pencil. It helped you concentrate and left you more grounded than just writing things on your phone, and you really needed the latter of those two things right now.
Papyrus had not spoken more than five words to you in the two days he'd been at your house. You didn't blame him in the least, but it meant you didn't want to push him and ask him things. Your brain was really pushing you to think of any small thing you could to help the situation, and making the house feel more like theirs was one of those things.
The problem was that you only had two bedrooms. One upstairs, the 'master' with a connected bathroom that you used, and one downstairs that was smaller but still a decent size. You could do a swap and let them have the master, but that still meant they'd have to share a room and you didn't want to make them do that. Would they be fine with that? They seemed very close, but everybody needed their own space and privacy. But you counted in 'everybody' so the math just wasn't adding up.
You bit the end of your pencil in thought. It would take some time to be financially able, but you'd thought about closing in the back porch before. An addition would also be possible, but again, take time. You worked just as much as you needed to and then some, for pleasure-spending, but that meant you didn't have much by way of savings beyond a small 'in case everything goes to shit' fund.
"whatcha thinkin' about?"
You jumped, not even aware of Sans's presence. Oh- jeez, and Papyrus's. The smaller stood at the end of the couch with his hands in his pockets, seeming well aware he caught you off guard while Papyrus lingered behind.
"You need to weigh more, I can't hear you walking around," you said, and it made Sans laugh. He'd been both more sad and more happy in the days since Papyrus returned, but the happiness often won out.
"i'll keep that in mind. but seriously, what're your blueprints for?" he asked. He sat down beside you, beckoning his brother over.
Papyrus, still in his funny-looking undersized clothes, hesitantly walked over. He looked at his brother, at the couch, then at you. He looked at the chair nearby. He seemed lost.
"Here, I'll scootch," you said as you hoped the sadness didn't come through. The couch was big enough for three, you'd just been occupying two spaces like an asshole in a parking lot. You moved over, Sans moved over, and only with a nod of confirmation did Papyrus take an awkward seat on the sofa.
"Uh, but, anyways, I'm just trying to think of where to put you guys. And me too, I guess," you said, handing Sans your notebook that had very little written on it- a couple crudely drawn layouts of the house with your and their names in various different places. "Don't look too hard because there's nothing there, I just like holding the pencil sometimes."
Sans looked at your misshapen boxes and words with lots of question marks after them, moving the notebook over so that Papyrus could see it, too. Since that first day Sans had eased off on trying to get Papyrus to speak to you, maybe after realizing how bad things were. But said skeleton looked curious, so you held your lightly-chewed pencil over- ignoring the way it made him flinch. Well, you tried to, but you really, really couldn't.
Papyrus looked at you in worry, your pencil offered over the notebook that Sans had held in both hands. You wiggled it at him.
"I thought you'd want to add to my blueprints- ignore the bite marks, I don't know who made those," you said.
"uh, we watched you make them," Sans said. "it was kinda gross."
You shook your head but remained firm in your offer. Papyrus looked so badly like he wanted to accept the pencil, his single hand inching up, but he kept looking at you like it was some kind of joke or cruel trick. You were still getting used to reading his expressions because of the crack.
"I can get you an unchewed one if you'd like?" you asked, pulling it back to you for no other reason than it was awkward to hold it over Sans for so long. You looked at him instead and held it up as an offer, which he accepted.
"chewed is fine for me, i have low standards," he said. You could hear the emotion in his voice- it wasn't disappointment, certainly not in his brother, but it was something.
Papyrus turned his attention to the floor, and you didn't miss his hand squeezed the edge of the couch cushion. You had no idea what to do and that made you upset, but he solved one of those problems. He stood up, opening his mouth like he wanted to say something... he glanced at you, and you saw the beginnings of tears, and then he made a hasty retreat to the kitchen.
"... jeez," Sans said sadly, quietly. You gave him a look and it must have conveyed exactly what it meant to, because he shook his head. "you're doin' great, don't worry about it."
"Of course I'm worried about it..." you said, staring at the open doorway to the kitchen. You sighed. "It's only been a couple days, I guess."
"exactly, how long'd it take me to open up? he'll get there." Sans rubbed a hand over his skull. "at least he's right handed..." Sans shivered but quickly pulled himself out of it. "hey, these are some good drawings, though."
"Calling them drawings is generous, I was just brainstorming," you said, raising your voice to speak at a normal volume now. Sans started scribbling, and you watched intently.
He drew a little face with 'artist' written above it, an arrow pointing to the crude art.
"Wow. Uhm." You leaned over to look at his drawing better. "Is that... me?"
"i gave 'em hair, didn't i?" Sans tapped the page and his creation. "me and my bro don't have the stuff, i thought it'd be obvious."
"It's something," you said, and that made him laugh.
"everyone's a critic," he grumbled with a shrug, and you liked this- he really did seem happier, even if the situation with Papyrus was far from perfect. He circled one of your drawings, the one with he and his brother in the downstairs, smaller bedroom together. "i think this one would be fine, though."
"That was an early thought, I think sharing a room is unavoidable for a while but- see-" you pointed to a later drawing down the page, "I think it makes sense if you two got the bigger room."
"that's your room, though," Sans said.
"It can be not my room, it's just my room currently," you said. "Or- I can move to the other room, is what I mean."
"i don't know, seems like a lot of trouble," Sans mumbled. "ya really don't have to."
"Are you saying that because you really want to have the smaller room or because you don't want to impose?" you asked, looking away from the page and up at him.
“... you just go straight for the heart sometimes, dontcha?” he said.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean-”
“nah nah, i get it, it’s just…” Sans sighed. You stopped talking to let him finish, waiting patiently. He handed you the notebook and pencil before leaning back on the couch and staring up at the ceiling. “For a long time i didn’t make any choices- couldn’t, i guess- so having to make a bunch of them now is… a lot.” His softly glowing sockets met your gaze. “am i making sense?”
“Yeah, you are,” you answered, and you put the scribbling stuff aside and sat back with him, pulling a leg up and resting your chin on it. “I need to consider it more than I do, sorry if I mess up and say things like that. Keep calling me out on it.”
“hey, pobody’s nerfect,” he said with a shrug and a smile. “it still feels a little bit unreal that i’m not your dog anymore and you’re worrying yourself over me and pap having a room for ourselves at all- let alone separate ones.” Sans winked. “I’m not complainin’ or nothin’ cause my bro deserves it, and if he caught me saying that about him and not myself he’d give me a stern talking to, so…” Sans sighed and it seemed like it genuinely took a lot out of him to say: “i guess i deserve it, too.”
“You do, you both do. I feel bad that I can’t do more to help so my brain is just… trying to fix a problem that can’t be fixed like that, if that makes sense,” you explained with a huff.
“It sure does, pal, and we both appreciate it a ton, so if-”
“A skele -ton?” you cut him off to say on impulse.
He stopped, looking at you with a real, growing grin. You grimaced at your own almost-subconscious behavior before Sans said: “you stealin’ my material?”
“You say it all the time!” you said, exasperated but in a good way. “I hear the word ‘ton’ and that’s all my brain does, your stupid puns rattle around in there like-”
“rattle? like bones ?” Sans cut you off.
You groaned. “No! Like beans in a maraca!”
Sans chuckled a moment longer before he let out a deep breath. You shook your head but smiled.
“seriously, though,” he said after he composed himself. “all jokes aside, this situation ain’t easy for any of us and slip-ups and mix-ups and other unfortunate -ups are bound to happen. you’re goin’ above and beyond what i used to think the best case scenario for me was, so…” he looked at you. You could feel how genuine he was. “thanks for this. if you really got no bones about it, we’d appreciate the big room.”
“I got bones about it, but, uh… just you and your brother’s…? No, that sounds gross, uh-”
“we’ll workshop it. cause you’re right, that sounded nasty, gotta work on that natural delivery.” Sans gave an exaggerated thumbs down.
“I’m with you on that one, no worries,” you agreed. You looked over at the open doorway to the kitchen, wondering if Papyrus was still in there and hearing all of this or if he’d retreated further. “But, also seriously, I just want you guys to feel safe here. As much as you can- and if that takes time, that’s fine. There’s no rush. If you’re gonna live here for however long, it should be your home too, y’know?”
Sans idly smiled towards the same doorway. “that sounds real nice.”
Notes:
*EDIT* i goofed and made the guest bedroom upstairs in the past- i have retconned this small detail in previous chapters to make the two bedrooms discussed make sense. my adhd'd brain forgets the little details and sometimes i don't feel like reading back thru the entire story before writing a chapter I'M SORRYYY please forgive my unpolished fanfics please guys please (joking, i mean absolutely point it out if you feel like it but it is what it is)
Chapter 12
Notes:
a short sans pov chapter! its very short but that's because the next one is also done and i'll post it tomorrow DONT LET ME FORGET GUYS
Chapter Text
You went upstairs and Sans watched you go. He sighed deeply, composing himself for just a second before getting up and making his way to the kitchen and connected dining room.
Papyrus was sitting on the floor in the far corner, only the top of his skull visible from behind the table. Sans went over and slid against the wall to ease himself down beside him. His brother didn't look up- he had his knees drawn up and skull resting between them, arm wrapped around.
"hey," Sans said gently.
"... I'M MESSING THIS UP," Papyrus said with a strong wobble to his voice. He was speaking far more quietly than he did before, and it was hard not to notice it every single time.
"nah, you're doin' fine," Sans said, putting a hand on his brother's skull and giving it a pat. "they want you to take your time."
Papyrus raised his head to look over at his brother, the tears very obvious. He sniffled and leaned into Sans, who quickly made space for him and hugged him tight.
"look, pap, i shouldn't have pushed you that first day to talk to them," Sans admitted, squeezing Papyrus tight. He could feel the cracks in his bones- what had made them? A whip? A hammer? Dogs? Sans only had his own experience to go on. "you're still findin' your footing here, and that's okay. they're not mad, and you’re not messing anything up."
Papyrus pulled away enough to look at this brother. He lowered his eyes and gently took Sans's arm in his hand. He ran a thumb over some of the scars there and his face twisted into pain.
"YOU PROMISE THEY'VE NEVER HURT YOU?" he asked softly.
Sans looked away from the touch. "no, never. even when i was still a blaster. they didn't try to touch me after i didn't let them a couple times." He looked up at Papyrus's face and raised a hand there, running it along the horrible crack.
"I HATE IT," he said as Sans wiped his tears away. "I HATE BEING SCARED."
"yeah, it fucking sucks," Sans agreed. He returned to holding his brother tight. "it took me a while to get used to a human soul being around and just... there. i was here for, damn... two months? maybe more, i dunno, but it took me that long to, y'know... turn back."
"HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?" Papyrus asked, thankfully sounding more curious than sad.
"i think they knew i was hidin' somethin' and kept talking to me," Sans said. His chest warmed at the thought. "didn't press me about it, but after a while... got kinda hard to keep pretending. and i knew i'd probably never see you again if i did."
"WERE THEY UPSET?"
"no, it was weird. i mean, i think i'd be a little mad if i found out somebody'd been lying to me for months, but they just went with it. got me these hilarious clothes 'n everything."
"DO YOU... TRUST THEM?" Papyrus reached over and absentmindedly touched the round stump of his arm.
"i do, yeah. if they wanted to hurt me they’ve done a really shit job at it, i’ve slept right next to them half a dozen times. ya can’t get a better opening than that.”
Papyrus was quiet, idly rubbing the place where the rest of his arm should have been. Sans looked away, feeling too much. He shook himself and leaned into Papyrus's side.
”hey, y'know, i think they'll really like you once you two get to know each other.“ Sans sat in the presence of his brother's soul, still getting used to the fact that it was here. ”they have real 'pal' potential. paltential.”
“I DON'T THINK THAT WORD JUMBLE REALLY WORKS...” Papyrus said, but he relaxed and leaned into Sans, the two supporting each other. He snuggled in. ”BUT IT WAS NICE TO HEAR YOU LAUGH WITH THEM EARLIER.“
”heh, yeah,“ Sans breathed. It felt nice, too, but he wasn't going to say that. ”like i said, i was here for a long time before i let my guard down. it's... not easy.“
”I KNOW.“
They both went quiet. It was so much to process, and even if things were relatively okay now… that’s how they’d been before they’d got taken, too. Sans and Papyrus both began shaking at the memories and held each other close, the grief and pain easier now that they were reunited, but it was never gone. It was not the first time they’d done it, and it wouldn’t be the last, but hopefully it’d get easier.
Chapter 13
Notes:
okay, which one of you let me forget to post this?
just kidding- i mean i DID mean to post this yesterday but ermmmm sorrryyyyy i was baking cupcakes your honorpapyrus and reader interact! more news at 11
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Your brain was still poking and prodding at you to do something to help the situation that couldn't be helped, so you set it on something productive and cleaned the house. It would need to be done before you started moving stuff around for the room swap anyway, and the mattresses were going to be delivered in a couple of days.
You hummed to yourself as you worked on the kitchen, music playing over your phone speaker to focus your brain. You were wiping off the counters, sights set on cleaning the microwave and stove top next.
Caught up in your cleaning thoughts and the music that was playing, it took you almost running into Papyrus for you to notice he was there. You squeaked, startled, and stepped back to give him some room.
”Oh, god, sorry!“ you said, hand on your chest. It was nine in the morning, so it made sense at least one of the skeletons would be up and about. It was odd for Papyrus to be that skeleton, alone, but not unwelcome. He stood at the end of the kitchen island, single hand resting on the top of it. The sleeves of the shirt covered all but the very end of his missing arm.
”You can do whatever kitchen-related thing you need to, sorry if I was in your way,“ you said. Papyrus shuffled a little bit, and it threw you for a loop when he opened his mouth.
”I WAS... WONDERING IF YOU NEED ANY HELP?“ he asked. You blinked and it took your brain a few moments to kick back into gear.
”Oh- oh! Well, I mean, you really don't need to help, but if you'd like to...” you paused to think for a moment. You wouldn't turn down the help, and it was great he was talking to you! You settled on a task. ”I was gonna vacuum the floors, but I'd happily pass that one to you. I kinda hate vacuuming, to be honest.“ You smiled. “I was using the excuse of not waking you guys up to put it off.”
“I CAN DO THAT,“ Papyrus said, a resolute if not anxious look on his face. You wetly plopped your washcloth down on the counter and gave him a smile.
”Thanks, you're a life saver.“
You took him to the closet that housed the dreaded device and got it out for him. It had seemed like an obvious choice, since it could be done with one arm. To make the task less excruciating for you, you'd bought a fancy cordless vacuum, so that would be even less hassle.
He was antsy, obviously still unsure and pretty uncomfortable, but the fact he was making an effort to speak to you meant a lot and made you feel a warm, happy feeling that took you a moment to place- pride.
”Do you think this'll wake your brother up?“ you asked as you hauled the thing out and made sure it was charged.
”NO. HE'LL JUST GO BACK TO SLEEP IF IT DOES.“ Papyrus pulled at the bottom of his silly crop top- you still needed to get bigger clothes- but he wasn't overly tense.
”It seems like he's pretty good at that,“ you said, and he nodded.
You set him loose, telling him to shout if he needed anything, and went back to the kitchen to resume your own cleaning.
It was... nice. You did your cleaning in the kitchen, the sound of the vacuum almost drowning out your music, but you didn't mind. You continued humming even after the vacuum stopped some ten minutes later.
Papyrus came into the kitchen, the canister held in his hand. He stared at the cupboard door that housed the garbage can for a moment- you observed out of the corner of your eye, not wanting to make him feel embarrassed- and then back at the vacuum. He went to sit the vacuum on the counter before he stopped, looking at you and then the washcloth sitting nearby, and then back to his predicament. When you turned to face him properly, he looked upset.
It hurt a lot. You knew that the poor guy was going to have problems, but it still hurt to see this first real example. You didn't move towards him for fear of spooking him, but you sat the scrub brush down you'd been using to wash the sink.
”Hey, do you need some help?“ you asked softly. ”You can sit it on the counter, if you're worried about it getting dirty. I don't mind. I don't want to cross any boundaries since I know...“ you trailed off, realizing addressing the lack of an arm directly was just going to make things worse. ”I know it's been a sudden transition back to two legs, uhm... but I'm happy to help if you ever need it.“
Papyrus once more looked between you, the cupboard door, and the canister in his hand. He opened his mouth, shut his mouth, and then finally met your gaze. The tears gathering in his sockets struck through your heart like a bullet.
”Yes, Please,“ he said in a voice bordering a whine.
Hold it together, you told yourself. Don't cry. You nodded and walked over, slowly, and Papyrus stepped back a couple more steps than was necessary as you opened the door and pulled out the sliding rack that held the garbage can.
”You can leave it open, I'll get one of the spinny-top ones to have outside of the cupboards next time I go to town,“ you said. ”Sorry I didn't think of that sooner.“
Papyrus didn't empty the vacuum. You looked at him in worry and saw the tears falling in earnest. You wanted to do something, anything , so badly, but... but you just swallowed and took a step back yourself, rubbing your neck for something tactile to pull you from your sadness.
”Hey, uhm...“ you composed yourself as your voice wavered. You felt so bad for him. ”Do you need some space? I know this is a lot, and... and I really do understand if you need time. You haven't done anything wrong.“
”I'M. I'M OKAY.“ Papyrus said, raising his arm and awkwardly rubbing his cheekbones to wipe the tears away. You took in the huge scar on his face, hoping that it would heal at least a little with time. ”I THINK I JUST... I GUESS I COULD USE A 'HAND' WITH- WITH-“ he didn't finish, cutting himself off as he began to cry again.
You stared at the floor, heart aching. You couldn't just let him be alone in his grief, though, so you took a shaking breath.
”I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry,“ you tried to soothe. ”I've done a little bit of reading, uhm, since you got here, about adjusting to losing an arm.“ You rubbed your own, glancing up at him here and there. ”It's not easy for anybody, but me- and obviously your brother, we'll try to make it easier however we can.“ He was calming down again, and you gave him a sad smile. “The vacuuming can wait until later, if you'd like to finish it then...? Not that you have to, or I expect you to, but- but you were brave about coming and asking to help me, I don't want to like... undermine that? If that makes sense?” You grimaced at your own jumble of stupid words.
Papyrus didn't seem to care. He flushed a little when you called him brave and nodded. He hesitated for only a second before he stepped towards you and held out the canister.
“THANK YOU. IF IT ISN'T TOO MUCH TO ASK, WOULD. WOULD YOU LET ME READ THOSE THINGS, TOO?“
You smiled and stepped forward yourself, meeting him in the middle and taking the vacuum from him. Your skin- and his bones- made contact, and he flinched a little, but the trade of the sucker machine happened without issue.
”Yeah, of course! I can send them to Sans so you can open them on the laptop, okay?” you asked, which he nodded to. You were so happy he was comfortable enough to ask you for something, even if it was just links to some light reading. You sat the vacuum on the counter. “I’ll just be a little longer in here, and then I’m taking a break, if…” you paused. Was this okay to ask? Surely it was… you hoped. You looked at him and his face of both curiosity and apprehension. “I don’t know if you like movies much, but I was going to watch one. Sans really likes falling asleep to them, so I don’t think he’s finished a single one, but… if you’d like to watch with me, you’re more than welcome.” He was looking at you with big eyes, so you held up your hands. “Only if you want to! It’s totally fine to not join me, or to join me, uh… both options are equally fine.”
Papyrus sniffled, wiping the last of his tears away.
And then he gave you a small, watery smile. It was the first one you’d seen.
“SANS REALLY IS BAD AT MOVIES, BUT… BUT I WOULD LIKE TO WATCH ONE WITH YOU. I THINK.”
You gave him a silly thumbs-up, feeling so happy, relieved, and proud to see him smile like that. “Cool! Even if he’s the worst movie-watcher, you can tell your brother he’s welcome to join us. Maybe he needs a post-sleep nap.”
Papyrus groaned. “THAT SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING HE’D SAY HE NEEDS.”
You snickered.
This was nice.
Notes:
full disclosure, i have two arms. if i fuck something up or say something rude/impolite, PLEASE CALL ME OUT ON IT i'd really really like to know!!!
Chapter 14
Notes:
these fellas have been in my brain fluttering around like moths to a porch light. i think one of them flew in my mouth ech blegh oh god not the gnats-
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Papyrus started helping around the house anytime he could. He was still pretty hesitant around you, but you could tell he was trying very hard not to be. He wasn't okay with touch yet, not that you tried, because it made complete sense to you. When you and Sans hugged or leaned into one another, you tried not to notice the tension Papyrus held as he watched. You weren’t sure what he was thinking, but your guess was that Sans might be in danger and he had to be vigilant. That didn’t anger you, it just made you sad.
It took a week to get all of the things from your room tidy enough to bring downstairs and perform the room swap. The mattresses were the floor variety, two twins, and you took the boxes upstairs and let them start... inflating? Re-shaping? You weren't sure what the term would be. Despite it being a years-old technology, mattresses in the mail were a novel concept to you.
It was nice to get a chance to move all your stuff around and an excuse to clean everything. You’d stand up straight every time you entered the doorway, hands on your hips, and smile at your new room. You'd changed the layout slightly and bought some new bed clothes. It was crazy how little it took to give your brain that sweet, sweet happy chemical.
The skeletons had picked out their sheets and pillow cases online. Sans went with a darker blue set decorated with yellow stars- you'd been there to hear Papyrus say they'd be perfect for his older brother- and Papyrus's were a skull and crossbones pattern. It was funny.
Things were still uncertain and far from perfect, but it was nice that they had their own space and some agency now.
You still worked on the weekdays, and you were so happy it was a remote position. That computer science degree paid off, literally and not-so-literally. You still tried to go out and stay out for a good while on grocery days so that the brothers could have some space, but if you had to leave everyday you’d probably just spend your hours thinking about the skeletons.
It was a quiet Saturday morning. It was a little twisted that it only felt nice to wake up early on days you didn't have to, but so it goes. It was eight and you sat at the counter, sipping some coffee and listening to the muffled birdsong.
Papyrus was just large enough that you could hear his bare skeleton feet clacking down the stairs. Sans was too small, and he often found humor in coming up beside you and poking your squishy human side just to laugh at the noises you made.
Papyrus came into the kitchen, giving you an awkward little wave, and you returned it.
You'd finally gotten him some larger clothing. The shirts were very baggy and he'd taken to tying them right above his pelvis, but it was a step up from the silly crop tops. The pants had pull strings, so no problem there.
You didn't say anything, enjoying the silence and peace. Papyrus got himself some cereal and milk.
You were taking a sip of coffee when you saw him fumble his bowl in your peripherals.
It fell to the floor with a wet crack, a mix of milk, corn flakes, and shards of broken glass splattering across the kitchen floor. You nearly choked on your coffee.
”Oh, shit- that's a mess,“ you said as you stood up. ”Lemme go get a towel, don't move!”
You scampered off, leaving Papyrus staring at the milk mess. You grabbed a towel from the downstairs bathroom and your slippers then hurried back, worried about him stepping on the glass or tripping and falling or-.
You stopped. Papyrus hadn't moved, as you'd requested, but he was hunched over himself and crying.
“Hey, hey, it's okay!” you tried, moving around the kitchen island to be in front of him. Your goal was to form a bridge of safety through the glass with your towel.
As you got close, though, Papyrus whimpered. You froze at the noise, towel clutched in your hands.
“Shit, sorry,“ you said. Papyrus shook his head and sobbed. You watched him lift his leg to take a step back. and you moved forward again in panic.
”Wait, don't-“
A piece of glass crunched under his bones. He yelped, and you were completely helpless as his weight shifted and he fell to his knees- thankfully covered in cloth.
“Papyrus, hey, let me put this towel down so you can get through the glass,” you said, emotions rising. “I'm just gonna come a little closer to do that, okay? I'm just putting the towel down.”
He didn't really respond, and you looked to the stairs. Where the hell was Sans when you needed him? You swore to yourself and inched closer.
Papyrus flinched and looked at you in fear. He was a mess, his foot clearly injured and his pants milk-soaked and his cheeks dripping tears.
They threatened your own eyes and you backed away. You sat the towel on the counter.
“I'm… I'm gonna go get Sans, okay? I'm sorry,” you said, fighting so damn hard to keep it together, but you knew you were crying. You didn't give him time to respond before you turned and slipped out of the kitchen and up the stairs.
You moved fast, stumbling a little in your sad-sack of a state, and you knocked on their door, not waiting for a response and opening it to find a still-sleeping Sans tucked cozily into his bed.
“Sans, wake up pl- please,” you said, voice breaking as you awkwardly stood in the middle of the room.
He grumbled, turned over, and peaked his sockets open to look at you. As soon as he did they went wide and he scrambled out of bed.
“woah, ngh-” he wiped his eyes. “what's wrong? what's goin on?” He was just wearing shorts, and it was usually funny to see his little comically-small ribcage. It wasn't funny now.
”Papyrus is in the kitchen, he dropped a bowl. He needs help.“ You sniffled and turned your head away. You cringed at your own wavering voice.
Sans seemed confused but nodded anyway. You left the room first and quickly descended the stairs, hearing the very light click-clack of him behind you.
“There's a towel on the counter, he's already stepped on some glass, I'm- I'm just... going to be in my room,” you said lamely. Sans seemed concerned but you turned tail and ran like a coward.
You shut the door behind you and sobbed, choking it so they wouldn't be able to hear you.
It hurt. It hurt to see Papyrus so terrified and to know it was of you. You felt so selfish, crying like a baby, but it was so much to handle. You couldn’t help him. All you wanted to do was help him. You would be as patient and kind and understanding as he needed you to be, but in the face of your own helplessness it was hard to not break.
It wasn't his fault. There wasn't a trace of anger towards him, or any negative emotion at all. There was a lot aimed at the people who had hurt him. There was so much anger, and hate, and inability to comprehend how they could do this to somebody.
You were frustrated, and upset, and you felt like an asshole for it. You cried.
Notes:
uh oh whoopsies butter fingers moment
Chapter 15
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
You refused to let yourself wallow for too long. You could faintly hear the aftermath of the incident, and after you'd calmed down and an hour or so had passed, you went out. They'd probably be upstairs anyways, you reasoned, after what had just happened. You padded into the kitchen and saw the clean floor and bag of glass shards and rounded the corner into the living room.
Sans and Papyrus were sitting on the couch, leaning heavily into one another. You froze- you don't know why- and almost back-tracked before Papyrus caught sight of you and straightened immediately. He'd changed his pants -Sans had donned a shirt, too- and there was a bandage around his boney foot, but most of all you noticed how upset he still looked.
He looked like he wanted to speak. You relaxed a little bit as Sans turned to you, too, his look melancholy but unreadable.
”YOU. I.“ Papyrus looked frustrated at not having the words. He sighed. ”...I'M SORRY.“
It took you a second to find your own voice. Sans was watching the interaction intently.
“You didn't do anything wrong, dude,” you said, awkwardly shifting in your spot. You didn't want to move forward- you didn't want Papyrus to look at you like he had earlier. You didn't want to scare him.
“YOU WERE TRYING TO HELP ME,” he argued, a bit of newfound force in his voice. He seemed frustrated, and upset, and maybe a little angry? “YOU- I WAS-” he stopped, glared at the floor for a moment, and then looked away.
“I MADE YOU CRY.”
Your brain stuttered and you were talking before you knew what to say.
“You didn't! You didn't make me cry, I... I got a little overwhelmed with the situation, not you, I'm not upset with you,” you said, unhappy to hear the emotion in your own voice.
“BUT IT'S STILL MY FAULT! YOU'VE BEEN SO NICE TO ME, NICER THAN I EVER IMAGINED, BUT I'M NOT BEING VERY NICE TO YOU AND- AND I'M SORRY.”
He was crying again, and you were back to panic mode in your dismay.
“Please, please don't think I'm upset at you, and please don’t blame yourself” you said, your fears winning out. Papyrus looked up in surprise at the tears in your voice. “I'm sorry for losing my cool, but it's not because of you. I just-” You were already losing your cool now, so there was no point in trying to reel it back in. “I just want you to feel better, and I want to help, but sometimes I just can't and that makes me upset but it's not at you.“
Papyrus stared at you for a second, and Sans finally piped up.
”hey, guys, it's okay. it sounds like you both got the same goal,“ he said, putting a hand on Papyrus's knee. ”nobody did anything wrong. why don't you come sit down? it's your living room,” Sans said to you, nodding to the chair.
“But I don't want you to think that way,” you said, defeated, walking to the chair and deflating into it. “It's your living room. It's our living room. Saying that all this stuff is just mine and saying I have more say over everything- even if on some stupid level it's true, it shouldn’t be and it makes it feel like you're just guests.” You frowned at the floor between your feet. “I don't want you to think you have to do anything special to keep living here.”
They were both quiet, and in the silence your brain kept going and your mouth kept flapping.
“I try to give you guys as much freedom and privacy as I can because this sucks . Which you obviously know, and I know, but beyond letting you- what, pick out your sheets? Put things on the grocery list? I don't know how else to make it better. I want to make it better and I can't , and I'm sorry .” You groaned, wiping at your stupid tears. ”And I'm sorry I'm not more patient- that I'm impatient- I just...“
You sniffled and looked up at the skeletons, one still crying and the other looking at you with wide eyes.
”I don't really know what to do. About any of this. I don't know the right thing to do, but I’m not the one that should be crying like a baby over it. Which is why I’m so frustrated at myself for crying like a baby over it.“
You lowered your head again, absolutely refusing to meet their gazes.
This wasn’t fair for them. They could leave, if they really wanted to, but they would have nowhere to go and you shuddered to think about them getting captured again. They couldn’t even go outside, not beyond your backyard and the fence that hid them from the world, and that pissed you off. They might’ve escaped being treated like literal animals, but they were still far from being treated like people.
You were a little lost in your own anger until a soft hand was put on your shoulder.
You looked up at Sans, who took his hand away and held his arms open.
”you sound like you could use a hug,“ he said softly. He looked sad and a little worried and you didn't hesitate a second before standing up halfway and wrapping your arms around him tight. Papyrus stood nearby, keeping some weight off of his foot, but it seemed like the injury wasn’t serious.
“oof, you been workin' out? you're gonna break a rib,” he wheezed, and you eased up immediately.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, not letting him go. He'd been right- you really, really needed this.
“nah, i'm just joking, you're too much of a softie to break a bone,” he said, patting your back.
“Sorry for getting all worked up,” you said. You pulled away from the embrace and looked at the taller skeleton, shuffling his feet nearby. “I really mean it, though, about not being mad at you. Stuff takes time, I’m just not good at keeping it together when there isn’t really anything I can do.” You sighed. “But I’ll work on it. I was just scared you were going to get hurt.”
Papyrus's face softened, and he stepped closer. His hand was shaking, and he lifted it like he wanted to put it on your shoulder, but… he hesitated. Then it fell back to his side and he looked away.
“SORRY…”
“Don’t be, it’s okay,” you said, giving him a smile. “I promise you don’t have to be okay with touching me- you honestly don’t ever have to be okay with that-”
“BUT I WANT TO BE!” he exclaimed. “I REALLY LIKE YOU AND WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND, BUT IT WOULD BE HORRIBLE TO GET SCARED OF YOUR FRIENDS!”
Your face for sure went red. “I mean- well- I think… I think it’d be reasonable to get scared after what you went through, even of your friends?” You rubbed the back of your neck, feeling a little flustered. “I, uh. I also think you’re cool. Being afraid of me sometimes doesn’t make you less cool.”
Papyrus shifted around in place, but he had a look on his face that was somewhere close to embarrassed, but not far from flattered. Sans watched him with an soft, idle grin.
“THANK YOU FOR BEING SO KIND TO US, BUT PLEASE BE KIND TO YOURSELF, TOO,” Papyrus said, a little louder than he had been before. He gave you a watery smile with those big, endearing teeth of his. ”I'M NOT GOOD AT BEING PATIENT, EITHER... SO MAYBE WE CAN START BEING FRIENDS RIGHT NOW?”
You grinned despite the recent tears.
“I'd really, really like that. It's still okay to get scared and not want to be touched, though. Friends can still do that.”
“OKAY, BUT YOU HAVE TO TELL US NEXT TIME YOU'RE FEELING BLUE.” Papyrus gave you a somewhat stern look, but it melted after a moment.
”yeah, if we're really all equals here, you gotta let us help you, too,“ Sans said, coming closer and bumping you a little with his hip, hands tucked into the pockets of his shorts. “triangles are the strongest shapes, y'know?”
“No, I don't, but I believe you.” You looked at the two of them and digested Sans’s words, knowing that they were true. You needed to stop trying to fix everything yourself; working together would make all of you far happier. You smiled. “And I will.“
Notes:
sometimes i rush to the comfort and it kinda voids the validity of the hurt, but don't worry guys, papyrus is suuuper hurt in this one, no big monumental light bulb hug moment to heal him. this skeletons got issues!!
Chapter 16
Notes:
here, have a nice warm, fluffy chapter- it's on the house :^]
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The following Monday, Papyrus sat with you on the couch as you did some work. Usually you'd stay in your bedroom, but it was nice to switch it up now and again, and Papyrus choosing to spend his morning sitting in peaceful silence with you was a welcome change.
He was on the laptop you'd given to him and his brother. It sat on the arm of the couch while he bent close to the screen, squinting a little to read some information about adjusting to disabilities. You started a query on its way before looking over at him.
“Do you usually have to get that close to read stuff?” you asked. Papyrus sat up straight again and flushed. It was a wonder that the scar didn't limit his range of emotions much, only the one corner of his mouth.
“IS THAT NOT NORMAL?” he asked. He sounded worried.
“It's normal,” you reassured, “I was just wondering if you used to have glasses or anything.”
“WHY WOULD I NEED GLASSES?”
“To help you see better, mostly. It's really common for humans to need glasses,“ you said. ”Do monsters not wear them?“
”WELL, I KNOW WHAT GLASSES ARE...“ Papyrus thought for a moment. ”SOME MONSTERS WORE THEM. MY FRIEND UNDYNE'S GIRLFRIEND DID, BUT I NEVER ASKED WHY.“ He started looking unsure again. ”DO YOU THINK MY VISION IS REALLY THAT BAD?“
”Oh, I have no clue, I just saw you leaning in to look at the screen and wondered,” you tried to ease, really not wanting to upset him. “I can get you a pair of readers from the store next time I go- they're cheap glasses for... well, reading. If you want to try wearing them, that is.”
Papyrus fidgeted for a moment, looking at the keyboard in thought.
“YOU'RE SURE IT WOULD BE FINE AND NOT WEIRD?” he asked.
You smiled. “I’m sure, totally fine and un-weird.” You had a thought and pointed to his laptop. “Here, look up how many people wear glasses, we'll find out.”
Papyrus nodded, his typing a little slow, but even if he seemed mildly annoyed by that he powered through and blinked at the results.
“OH, WOW! YOU WERE RIGHT.” He turned the screen for you to see.
“Damn, I didn't know it was more than half,” you said before giving him a thumbs up. “In that case, seems safe to say it isn't weird in the slightest.“
Papyrus smiled a little himself before he turned the laptop back and leaned in to read more on the topic. You watched him for a second, being hit with a wave of endearment towards the skeleton brothers who'd taken up residence in your home. It was so different and better to have people here that you trusted, who understood you. Even if those people were initially your dogs- which you tried not to think about very much.
Papyrus went on reading, telling you interesting facts here and there, and you went on working and listening with a smile on your face.
Sans woke up just in time for lunch- which he made without telling either of you.
“bone app the teeth,” came the voice you were getting used to being surprised by.
You looked over to the kitchen doorway and saw Sans with three plates stacked on top of each other, a sandwich on each. He was still in his pajamas.
“THAT'S NOT HOW YOU SAY THAT,” Papyrus grumbled, but you just looked at the sandwiches. You hadn't eaten breakfast, you realized in that moment.
“maybe you don't,” Sans teased as he came over and sat the three plates on the coffee table before plopping himself between you and his brother. “you gonna bone app the teeth and eat the tasty 'wich i made or not, bro?”
“I've heard people shorten it to 'sammy' before,” you commented, looking between the wiches- or sammies- at hand and then at Sans. “Would it be wrong to assume one of those is for me?”
“well, i made them all for myself, honestly, but i guess i can be generous,” Sans said with a cheeky little smirk. ”just kidding, the top one's all yours.“
”Thank you, I'm actually starving,“ you said, reaching over and taking it.
”yeah, i've seen you skip breakfast just about once a day, not too surprised,“ he said.
”I forget sometimes...“ you said, but then you were eating and way too preoccupied with that. It was a ham and cheese sandwich with lettuce and tomato- it’d be really yummy even if your stomach wasn’t grumbling.
”YOU TECHNICALLY SKIPPED BREAKFAST, TOO, BROTHER,“ Papyrus said, but he took the second and sat it in his lap. ”I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WERE UP!“
”just got up, that's different, metabolism and all,“ he defended with a wave of his hand. ”you early birds wouldn't get it. too full of worms.“
”Gross,“ you commented between bites. After another, you took a longer pause. ”Seriously, thank you, getting a gift sandwich I don't have to make myself is like... the dream.”
Sans shrugged away his blush and sat back, bringing his legs up onto the sofa and sitting cross-legged. ”no problem, seemed like a good peace offering for what i'm about to do. which is immediately go back to sleep in this new, comfortable location.“
”YOU JUST GOT UP!“ Papyrus complained while you laughed.
”but the sammy, rus,“ Sans pleaded. ”you're not gonna forgive me? i spent minutes making that for you.“
”UGH, FINE,“ he said, rolling his eyes (how did a skeleton do that?) before taking a bite of said offering and going back to his laptop. ”YOU CAN'T LAY ON ME, THOUGH, I NEED THIS ARM FOR INTERNET RESEARCH.”
“harsh, maybe i didn’t want to get as snug as a bug in a rug on your boney ass anyways,” Sans commented, already looking at you with big, puppy-dog eyes.
“Oh, uh, me?” you asked in your ever-awkward style. You'd already finished the sandwich, inhaling it like a feral animal. You brushed any crumbs off before reaching behind Sans for the blanket that sat on the back of the seat and putting it in his lap. “Knock yourself out.”
”thanks, pal. at least i know how to butter one of you up.“
”SHH, THAT ISN'T VERY 'KNOCKED OUT' BEHAVIOR,“ Papyrus commented, absolutely unphased.
Sans said nothing more as he leaned against your side, wiggling around as he got comfortable. You had a little laptop desk, so it was easy to adjust and move your arm enough for him to get close, then bring it down again to lazily hold him. It wasn't hard to do most of your work with one hand. As soon as you gave him the all-good on your own comfort, he closed his sockets.
He was asleep again within minutes. You wouldn't call this 'normal' yet, based solely on how unusually happy and whole it made you feel, but you would not mind if it became normal.
“HE'S SO LAZY...” Papyrus commented softly, looking over at his brother with obvious love and care in his gaze. Said brother snored a little. ”YOU DON'T HAVE TO LET HIM USE YOU LIKE A HEATED PILLOW, YOU KNOW.”
“Yeah, but it's kinda nice,” you said, knowing you were probably blushing but choosing to ignore it. “My family was never big on the whole 'touchy-feely' stuff, and I've been living alone for quite a long time now,“ you explained. You looked at the still-conscious brother and gave him a shy smile. “Guess it still feels pretty novel to... be close to people?”
Papyrus was looking at you with a funny expression. He seemed a little bit sad?
“BEFORE ALL OF THE BAD STUFF HAPPENED, MY BROTHER AND I ALWAYS HAD EACH OTHER AND I NEVER WENT WITHOUT A HUG WHEN I NEEDED ONE,” Papyrus said, looking only a little bummed upon mentioning the bad stuff. ”I CAN'T IMAGINE NOT HAVING A BROTHER TO HUG- OR, WELL...“ Papyrus looked away, obviously thinking about the length of time very recently that that was the case. ”I CAN'T IMAGINE GOING MY WHOLE WITHOUT THAT.“
”Yeah, you two were obviously close before, and still close now,“ you said, trying to skirt around the topic. Your heart hurt a little at acknowledging your own loneliness. ”I'm glad you had each other.“
”AND NOW YOU HAVE BOTH OF US!” Papyrus said so earnestly you didn’t doubt how much he meant it.
The sentiment struck you deep. It hit you very, very hard, but in a good way. Your gobsmacked appearance must have been visible, because Papyrus continued:
“I MEAN- UHM, IF YOU WANT THAT!” he amended.
“I do,” you said at once. You looked down at Sans, still snoozing away, and then at his brother. “I wish things were different and a lot of stuff hadn't happened, but... but I'm really happy you guys are here. It's nice.”
Papyrus smiled, a big and honest smile, and you returned it.
Notes:
sans got one taste of "positive human contact" and now he's gotta have his fix. monsters for sure need more actual, tangible displays of love and affection such as cuddling vs humans, and sans has a lot of that to make up for- he'll cuddle anything that moves (that has earned his trust). he is devoted to being the best sentient plushie somebody can be, for both his brother and his new human bestie
reader initially went in "not minding" the cuddling but then they also got a taste for snuggles and are now hooked. a match made in heaven (yet forged in hell)
oh also, kaliawai512 inspired this iteration of papyrus to get glasses because they usually write him as needing them and i love that a lot- headcanon-osmosis occurred
Chapter 17
Notes:
another pretty fluffy chapter, this is the comfort part of the hurt/comfort
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
A week went by, and it was very obvious that Papyrus was really going out of his comfort zone to be close to you.
When you sat on the couch, he sat with you, donning his new glasses that did, in fact, help. When you went to the kitchen to cook, he came, too- mostly to see what you were doing and learn, but he never strayed too far. You didn't want to compare it to lost puppy behavior, because that felt a little insensitive, but the shoe kinda fit.
The uneasy look he used to give you and his brother when you were close had melted into one of yearning.
You and Sans sat together, for once actually watching the movie instead of it being sleep-fodder for the skeleton. It was an old space movie and Sans liked to make little comments- you’d seen the whole series before, so you were unbothered by the interruptions and laughed.
“woah, uh. am i goin’ crazy or is that her brother.”
You laughed even as you cringed. “You’re sane, they just don’t know they’re related yet.”
“why even put it in the movie? somebody has some weird kinks in the studio.”
You snorted, giving him a friendly push. It wasn’t often that you and Sans were alone together, not with his sleep schedule being the trainwreck it was and Papyrus being awake seemingly all the time. He was awake now but in their room, doing an exercise routine to strengthen his arm. You’d offered to clear some space in one of the main living areas but he refused, and you got the feeling he didn’t want to be watched. You hoped he'd become less embarrassed about his disability with some time- and eventually not embarrassed at all- but you could understand why he wasn't quite okay with 'showing it off' yet.
"how are you doin' after that whole 'milk' incident?" Sans asked after the credits started. He was close enough to touch you but not quite leaning into you, moreso the back of the couch.
"Or was it the skim milk incident?" you asked, the joke landing perfectly and making Sans shake against you with his guffaws and chortles. "But, uh, I'm okay," you answered seriously. "It was a lot, but you guys really helped by just letting me whine about it for a while."
"hey, it wasn't whining," Sans defended you. He tucked his hands into the pocket of his hoodie, another selection from the place little kids got their clothes, adorned with a cool monster truck. "i get that you don't want to make this about you, but, like. it kinda is?" He leaned forward enough to look at you.
"I dunno, it just feels bad to get so upset," you said softly. "I know it's probably normal, but Papyrus got so worried that he had upset me somehow, and I don't want him to worry about that."
"but you're worried about him," Sans pointed out.
"Yeah but..." You sighed.
"eh, see my point?" Sans said with a shrug. "don't get me wrong, i understand and appreciate the hell out of you for trying so hard, but you can't treat him different because of all the shitty stuff that happened. that'll just make him feel worse."
Your shoulders sagged. "You're right... you're right," you relented. "He wants me to feel better, I want him to feel better, and… and you want to take a hundred million naps."
Sans laughed. "okay, true, but i also want you both to feel better."
"What about you, though?" you asked. You put your arm around his shoulder, looking for permission, and he moved to be as close as he could.
"what about me?"
"How are you doing?" you asked. "Papyrus has been the center of attention, for obvious reasons, but I'm still here for you, too."
"ha, i know," he reassured. "don't worry about that." Sans looked thoughtful for a moment, staring at the bright screen still scrolling through names, before he looked up at you.
"honestly? i'm okay." He smiled, once more resting his head against you. "i'm here, papyrus is here, you're here... i get all the food i can eat and all the naps i can take... i guess i have pretty low standards, but this is all i need right now."
"You deserve a lot more, but I'm glad you're doing alright," you said. "I just wanted you to know that... y'know, same as me, you're allowed to get upset."
"thanks, pal, that means a lot. you sure you don't have a close family? you're good at this platonic-lovey kinda stuff."
You blushed. "Uhm, thank you... I think? I assume. But, no, I don't. I still can't get over that I'm at the cuddling stage of a friendship with anybody , let alone a skeleton monster guy."
"well this skeleton monster guy loves snuggles, cuddles, nuzzles, and everything in between," he said with a little chuckle. "i know humans don't need physical affection and love as much as us monsters do, but how'd you go so long without it? i mean, unless one of the times you left for 'groceries' when i wasn't talkin' was actually to have an intimate afternoon with somebody you didn't want your dog to know about." Sans gave you a fake-suspicious look. "hey... were you seeing other dogs?"
You spluttered out a laugh, caught off guard. "No, oh my god, and you called Star Wars gross for incest kisses-" Sans all but barked in laughter at that, trying to say that wasn’t what he was saying, but you shook your head to silence him. You smiled for a bit, but it fell. "Uhm... but, I don't know, honestly. I've always been pretty awkward and... not really sure of myself, and that's not really something most people want in a relationship- platonic or otherwise," you said, followed by a sigh. "So I just grew up without it and once I was grown, I... kept going. I don't think I realized how bad I needed it until you came along," you mumbled, blushing at your own words and how mushy they sounded.
"aw, man," Sans breathed, wrapping his arms around you and giving you a hug. You drew him close with the one around his shoulder and brought the other around, kinda half-scooping him into your lap.
"You're sure you're okay with stuff like this?" you asked into his shoulder. "I don't want to cross any of your boundaries."
"nah, this is great," Sans reassured you, rubbing your back. "you're not the only one who is maybe a little desperate for some good old fashioned cuddle-lovin’s."
You let out a happy breath.
Papyrus laid in his bed, but he couldn't sleep. The ceiling was much more interesting, and his mind was too busy to even attempt to get his hour in.
“pap, you're giving the walls dirty looks again,” Sans commented quietly. He was sitting up in his own bed, reading a book with a cute little light you'd bought for him.
“MY LOOKS ARE SPOTLESS, THANK YOU,” Papyrus replied, but he sighed.
”you thinkin' about the human?“ Sans asked, closing his book and heaving himself up to walk to his brother's bed. Papyrus nodded sullenly and scooted over, sitting up himself and letting Sans occupy the space where one of his arms would be. He grabbed his brother's hand and nuzzled his skull against the smaller's in a familiar, comforting way. It was a bit of an adjustment in balance and positioning, and Papyrus had definitely been toppled over by Sans when he thought he’d be able to hold on and stabilize himself with an arm he no longer had, but that was okay and usually just ended in horizontal-style closeness.
”WHY CAN'T I JUST... TOUCH THEM.“ Papyrus shut his sockets. ”I WANT TO, AND I WANT TO NOT BE SCARED, BUT WHEN I THINK I CAN I JUST... STOP.“
”have you talked to them about trying?“ Sans asked, thumbing the side of Papyrus's hand.
“YES! WELL...” Papyrus thought for a moment. “NO, I SUPPOSE. I WAS HOPING THE MOMENT WOULD JUST FEEL RIGHT.”
“mm, that's fair, but you can't force that kinda thing. if you wait for it you might be waiting a long time.”
“WHEN DID... WHEN DID YOU FIRST TOUCH THEM?” Papyrus asked, a little quiet. A little sadder.
“well, a lot of the time it wasn't much of a choice. not that they ever forced me, but i couldn't walk when i first turned back. it was either let them help me or live on the floor.”
“I PROBABLY WOULD HAVE LIVED ON THE FLOOR...” Papyrus grumbled at himself.
“maybe, but i already knew them. i'd been here for a long time and was always looking for red flags, or some kinda sign i needed to run, but... they never gave me one.“ His voice was bittersweet.
”BUT, WHAT ABOUT AFTER THAT? WHEN DID YOU TOUCH THEM ?“
Sans thought for a second. “oh, it was when they helped me start walking again. they all but carried my old achy bones around the room a few times, and holdin' both of their hands kinda... gave me a good idea of who they were.” Papyrus looked down and saw Sans smile. “i could feel their soul, and i knew they weren't gonna hurt me. it was easier after that.”
“SO YOU THINK I SHOULD BREAK MY LEGS?”
Sans laughed. ”nah, you don't gotta be that extreme. maybe just... ask them. say you're still a little worried, and you don't know if you really can, but you'd like to try. even if it takes a few times to get out of that panic mode, i bet they'll be super proud of you for trying.“ He cuddled closer, resting he and Papyrus's hands over the scared skeleton's soul. ”i know i am.”
“HMM...” Papyrus thought, squeezing Sans's hand at his comforting words. “IT DOES LOOK PRETTY NICE WHEN YOU HUG THEM... THEY LOOK SQUISHY AND SOFT.”
“yeah, and warm, too,” Sans added. “and, once you get to the hugging stage, you can feel their soul real good. it...“ Sans stopped for a little while. Papyrus gave him time, and he eventually went on.
”you know how bad it felt when you could feel their souls?“ Sans asked in a whisper. ”how you knew they wanted to hurt you, and for you to hurt?“
Papyrus shuddered and nodded as Sans held him tight.
”well, it's like the opposite of that. you can feel how much they care about us, how much they want us to get better, hell, even feeling how angry they are at the assholes who tortured us is pretty therapeutic.“ Sans looked up at his brother, who looked very thoughtful. ”they care about you a lot, rus. i can feel their soul reachin’ out, how much they want you to feel better, but in a patient kinda way. they're a huge softie.“
Papyrus flushed, a small, shy smile on his face.
”REALLY?“
”yeah, honestly. maybe i shouldn't be encouraging you, it'll give me less cuddle time. scratch everything i just said.“
”THEY HAVE TWO SIDES, BROTHER, DON'T BE SILLY,“ Papyrus said. ”AND THEY TOLD ME HOW MUCH THEY LIKE WHEN YOU LAY WITH THEM, BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEIR FAMILY NEVER DID THAT. SO HAVING TWO SKELETON SNUGGLE-BONES WOULD PROBABLY MAKE THEM TWICE AS HAPPY!“
”that math checks out,“ Sans confirmed. “you just do what feels right, bro, don't force yourself if you still really don't wanna. they'll understand.”
“THANK YOU, OLD AND WISE SKELETON SAGE,” Papyrus teased. He got a little more serious. ”HOW WOULD YOU FEEL ABOUT SLEEPING ON MY MATTRESS TONIGHT?”
“sure, mine is all yours,” Sans joked, and Papyrus pushed him away in mock anger.
“I MEANT WITH ME, YOU RASCAL, AND YOU KNEW THAT!“
”yeah, i'm just rattling your bones,“ Sans said, but he was already laying down and holding out the covers for Papyrus to get under. ”c'mon, don’t gimme that look.”
Papyrus grumbled, but he was far from upset. It still felt a little surreal to be back with his brother, able to lay beside him again after so much time alone spent on a cold stone floor, or not being allowed to lay down at all. He didn’t want to think about those days, so he held his brother as close as he could and felt their souls beat together.
Notes:
as i was getting this chapter ready to post, a fuckin mouse walked across the open doorway to the office so I had to stop everything and see what the hell it was up to. got out through a rusty hole in one of the air vents but thanks for the guest appearance, little fella, much appreciated but don't come back THERE ARE THREE CATS IN THIS HOUSE YOU WILL DIE
Chapter 18
Notes:
dw guys the mouse didn't come back, it didn't end up a cat snack
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You hummed to yourself, looking at the few wall decorations that had yet to be put up in your newly-moved bedroom. You had a couple of posters and a little set of three canvases, all with different birds on them. You had wall space, but where would they look the best...
A knock on your door startled you, for some reason. It wasn't often you had to be sought out.
“Come in,” you called, still rubbing your chin and staring at the wall above your bed. The posters could go there, but would the three birds look okay on the other wall? And how far apart should they be for maximum effect?
The door opened slowly, eventually allowing Papyrus to poke his head in. “AM I INTERRUPTING ANYTHING?”
“Not at all, I'm just contemplating interior design,” you said, giving him a smile. “What's up?“
Papyrus came into the room and looked around, shutting the door behind him. He seemed a little nervous about something, hand playing with the strings on his joggers as he stood.
“DO YOU NEED ANY HELP? I'M PRETTY GOOD AT BEING TALL.“ He didn't address the second part of your question, but you didn't mind.
”You're very good at it, I think. Maybe you can help me hang up some of these wall-doohickeys?“
He brightened at having a task. “OF COURSE!”
Papyrus was nothing if not hard-working, and he didn't let his lack of a hand impede him. He just jammed the nails into the wall as best as he could with one hand, and once you handed him the actual rock you were using as a hammer, he finished the job. Should you be using nails to hang up some framed movie posters? Probably not. Did you care? Evidently you didn't. Why were you doing it with a rock? Because you didn't know where the hammer was, stop asking questions.
“IS THAT ALL OF IT?” Papyrus asked, looking at the bird art he'd just put up. He seemed proud, and you were, too.
“Yup, I don't have very much stuff for the walls. Oh, but hey, maybe after my next paycheck rolls in you and Sans can pick out some stuff for your room. It's pretty bare.“
”I WOULDN'T MIND SOME BIRDIES LIKE THIS IN OUR ROOM, BUT I'D WANT THEM TO BE MORE COLORFUL. THESE ARE ALL JUST BROWN!“
You giggled. “Okay, we'll look.“
Papyrus gave you a soft smile before looking at the birds again. It was strange for him to be in your room, door only a little ajar, seeking you out in private like he was. But it was a good strange.
”DO YOU KNOW THEIR NAMES?” he asked. ”WE DIDN'T HAVE THESE KINDS OF BIRDS UNDERGROUND. IN FACT, I’M NOT SURE WE HAD ANY BIRDS UNDERGROUND… JUST BIRD-MONSTERS.”
You pointed to each one in turn: “killdeer, house sparrow, brown-headed cowbird.”
Papyrus looked at you with a wrinkled up face, and it made you laugh. It made you laugh so hard you wheezed a little.
“WH- HEY! WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?” Papyrus asked, sounding only a little hurt.
“Sorry, I'm sorry,” you huffed after a good hard guffaw, composing yourself. “You just looked really disgusted about the birds.”
“WAIT, THOSE ARE ACTUALLY THEIR NAMES? YOU DIDN'T JUST MAKE THOSE UP?” he asked, balking at you. “HOUSE SPARROW IS REASONABLE, BUT YOU HAVE A BIRD CALLED A MURDERDEER?”
”Killdeer,” you corrected with a giggle, “but yeah, those are real. There's a ton of different bird species, so some of the names can get crazy.“ You laughed again but gave him a big smile. ”These three all live around here, I think I got the art at a local shop a long time ago.“
Papyrus blinked and shook his head. He turned back to the birds and took in the canvases a little longer before he cast you a sideways glance.
”I'M VERY GLAD I COULD HELP YOU WITH YOUR HANGING-UP ADVENTURE, BUT, UHM. I. HMM.“ Papyrus stopped, shifting his weight and not really looking at you beside him.
”I'm glad you were here to help, too, so if there's something you need, seems like a fair trade,“ you said, trying to convey that he could ask you for or about anything. He seemed conflicted for a moment before he inhaled sharply and took off.
”WELL SANS AND I WERE TALKING LAST NIGHT AND HE GAVE ME THE ADVICE OF TALKING TO YOU ABOUT THE WHOLE 'TERRIFIED OF HUMAN CONTACT' PROBLEM AND I STILL THINK IT'S A LITTLE WEIRD AND DON'T WANT YOU TO THINK I'M WEIRD BUT HE WAS PRETTY CONVINCING AND I...“ Papyrus slowed down, taking a deep breath as he blushed. ”...I WAS WONDERING. IF YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS WEIRD? AND IF WE COULD TALK IF YOU DON'T THINK IT'S WEIRD OR THAT I'M WEIRD?“
”Aw, dude,“ you said, putting your hands in your pockets. ”Of course that's not weird, and neither are you. Thanks for coming to me about it, I know it probably isn't easy.“
”IT'S NOT, AND I HATE THAT,“ Papyrus mumbled. He looked up at you sheepishly. “SO IS THAT A YES?”
“Yes, it's a yes,” you confirmed. “Where do you want to talk? We could go out to the living room if you want, or have Sans around, if that would make you more comfortable.”
“I. THINK I WOULD LIKE TO TALK IN HERE, IF THAT'S ALRIGHT?” Papyrus asked. His gaze met yours and you could see how nervous he was, and you were so proud of him for making this effort. “SANS IS SLEEPING, AND I THINK… I THINK I DON’T WANT HIM TO HEAR ABOUT… SOME THINGS. THAT WOULD MAKE HIM SAD AND HE DOESN’T NEED TO KNOW.”
“Yeah, that makes sense to me,” you said quietly, walking over to your bed and beckoning him to sit in your desk chair. “Make yourself comfortable.”
Papyrus looked at you, and the chair a few feet away, and he seemed like he was about to get upset before he squared his shoulders.
“IS IT ALRIGHT IF I SIT ON THE BED WITH YOU?” he squeaked. His voice wavered.
You blinked but moved over at once, throwing your blanket to the side and patting the mattress. “Come on over,” you said. You were a little nervous yourself, because you didn’t know what ‘talking’ entailed, but you’d do whatever he needed you to do to feel better.
Papyrus took a few slow steps before settling down on the mattress, a foot between the two of you. You brought one of your legs up and rested your arms on your knee, turned to face him. He looked at the floor with sullen sockets, one of his feet tapping the carpet. He was wearing socks that had little cacti on them- a pair of yours.
“I DON’T THINK THEY HURT SANS HOW THEY HURT ME,” Papyrus began, starting the conversation with a grenade. Thankfully you didn’t have to try and catch and redirect it, because he continued. “WE’VE TALKED ABOUT… WHAT HAPPENED, A LITTLE, AND… I THINK MAYBE SANS DID WHAT THEY WANTED HIM TO DO EVENTUALLY, AND SO SOME OF THE HURTING STOPPED, BUT THAT. DIDN’T HAPPEN. TO ME.”
Papyrus looked pretty hollow as he said it. You made a sad noise, just to let him know you were here and listening.
“I NEVER ACTUALLY FOUGHT,” Papyrus confessed, his hand finding the sheets and fisting it tight. “THEY TRIED, BUT I WOULDN’T, AND. AND I THINK THAT…”
He was crying, and you didn’t blame him. You leaned forward to catch his eye, just trying to make him feel seen. He looked at you, the scarred crack on his face more obvious now than ever.
“I THINK THEY JUST LIKED TO HURT ME,” he whined as he drew himself up, knees to his chest and tears falling heavy. He sobbed a couple of times and you gave him a second, your own heart aching profoundly.
“Papyrus… I’m so sorry,” you whispered. You didn’t know what the fuck else to say.
He cried for a while. You sat and you let him, because he obviously really needed to do this and you’d do anything for him and his brother. You wished so badly that you could take away some of the pain in his hoarse breaths and poorly-concealed whimpers. If sitting in here with him could do that, you’d do it.
“IT’S REALLY HARD,” he continued with a weak sniffle. “IT’S HARD TO THINK ABOUT… WHAT HAPPENED, BECAUSE I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY IT HAPPENED. SANS FOUGHT AND IT MADE THEM MONEY, BUT… BUT THEY JUST…” He struggled with the words, skull hidden in his pants. “THEY DIDN’T HAVE A REASON FOR ME. THEY JUST DID IT. AND KEPT DOING IT. AND IT HURT SO MUCH, AND I COULDN’T MAKE IT STOP, AND- AND I-”
“Papyrus, try to breathe, okay? Take a break if it hurts too much, I don’t want you to have a panic attack…” you murmured as his words got louder and heavier with grief. He took a shuddering breath, and then another, and then a dozen more. He didn’t raise his skull until he’d calmed down, and when he did, it was the most miserable you’d ever seen him.
“I COULD ALWAYS FEEL THEIR SOULS, AND HOW MUCH THEY HATED ME, AND WANTED ME TO SUFFER.” He looked away, to the wall with the birds on it. “I KNOW THAT… YOU AREN’T LIKE THEM. AND I KNOW THAT IF YOU WANTED TO HURT US, YOU WOULD HAVE. I KNOW IT, AND IT MAKES SENSE, AND I BELIEVE IT, BUT… THEN I SEE YOUR HANDS OR WATCH YOU MOVE TOO FAST, AND… AND I JUST…” he didn’t finish his sentence. He didn’t need to.
“You’re getting triggered,” you said plainly. It made Papyrus look at you, his wrist coming up to wipe at his tears. “You went through something really traumatic, and even if part of your brain can understand that it’s over now… part of it can’t.” You weren’t exactly a mental health expert, but you knew enough to make sense of what was happening. Or, what you guessed was happening. “If… if human hands always meant you got hurt, and for a long time that’s all you had to associate humans with, it makes sense that you’re still really afraid to be touched by one.”
Papyrus digested the words. He relaxed somewhat.
“BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE SCARED OF YOU,” he said.
“Well, we can work on it together. I think if you had some time to process and I can help the part of your brain that’s still scared understand that… not all people fingers mean it harm…”
“HOW WOULD WE DO THAT?” he asked. He seemed to be calming down, and you were so relieved that he wanted to get better as much as you wanted to help him.
“I don’t know,” you said honestly. You thought for a moment. “Is there a way for you to feel okay touching me? ”
Papyrus sat cross-legged on the bed. “MAYBE… MAYBE IF YOU WERE LAYING DOWN, AND ALSO YOUR EYES ARE CLOSED?” he ventured. He didn’t seem sure of himself.
“So, like, if you had the power in the situation? If there was no way I’d be able to hurt you even if I wanted to?”
“W-WELL, MAYBE, BUT- BUT THAT SOUNDS MEAN TO YOU-”
“No no, it isn’t mean,” you assured him. “I think that makes perfect sense.” You had a thought and snapped your fingers. “Do you want to try something now? We don’t have to, and it’s okay if we try and it doesn’t work, but we can if you want to.”
Papyrus was hesitant and mulled it over before nodding. You smiled and stood up, careful in your movements and walking to your desk.
“Okay, so, my thought process is like… I can’t hurt you if you tie up my hands.”
“WHAT?” he balked, standing up himself. “I DON’T WANT TO TIE YOU UP! WHAT IF- I MEAN- YOU COULD TRIP, OR YOUR CIRCULATION, OR… OR WHATEVER ELSE COULD HAPPEN!”
“Nothing is gonna happen, it’ll just be my hands, and I can do it myself,” you said, digging in your desk drawer for- aha. A wide coil of ribbon you’d bought years ago for some office holiday party. You unwound a good-length piece of it and snipped it with some scissors, leaving the pointy object behind as you took the ribbon back to the bed and sat down.
Papyrus was still standing, but as you began fiddling with the red fabric he seated himself again, too.
“ARE YOU REALLY OKAY DOING THIS?” he asked. He was watching you anxiously. “I- I MEAN- YOU DON’T HAVE TO!”
“I know, but if it’ll make it easier for you, then I’ll do it,” you said. You paused your movements and looked at him. “Are you comfortable with this, though? We don’t have to try if you don’t think it’s a good idea or it wouldn’t help at all.”
Papyrus didn’t meet your eyes. He sighed.
“I THINK IT WOULD HELP, BUT IT FEELS WRONG,” he admitted.
“It isn’t wrong, it’s just a little trust exercise,” you said, giving him a reassuring smile before working to loop the ribbon around your wrists and tie it. It was awkward trying to tie your own hands up, but you eventually finagled it so that, if both ends were pulled, you’d be pretty snugly confined.
You held your handiwork up a little so Papyrus could see. He looked worried, but you weren’t.
“You just have to pull the ends and it should be knotted,” you said. They were resting on the mattress so that Papyrus wouldn’t have to touch you to do so.
“YOU’RE SURE?” he asked, eyeing your work uncertainly. “WHAT IF YOU CAN’T GET UNTIED?”
“You or Sans can just cut the ribbon off, it’d be hard to rip it just by pulling it but scissors do the job.” You looked at him, and you put every ounce of sincerity you could into your voice as you said:
“I trust you.”
It made a surge of emotion go through the skeleton’s face. He was still a little unsure, but he slowly reached over and took the ends. You kept your wrists laid on your thigh, not moving them at all and looking at the mattress so he didn’t feel pressured.
“UHM. I’M GOING TO TIE IT, NOW,” he announced. You nodded, wiggling your fingers a little bit.
“I’m all wrapped up like a present,” you joked lamely in an attempt to keep the mood light.
You succeeded, Papyrus’s mouth twitching up into a smile as he gently pulled the ends, bones only brushing you gently here and there, until the ribbon was snug on your wrists. He let out a breath and moved away from you.
“ARE YOU OKAY? IS IT TOO TIGHT?” he worried.
You moved your wrists around. They certainly weren’t separating with the ribbon on, but it was loose enough that it didn’t bother your skin. You gave a silly-looking thumbs up with your bound wrists.
Papyrus looked at you. He seemed… conflicted.
“What are you thinking?” you asked him. “If you don’t mind sharing.”
“I’M THINKING… THAT I FEEL BAD YOU HAVE TO DO THIS FOR ME, AND THAT YOU MIGHT SOMEHOW FALL AND BREAK YOUR FRAGILE HUMAN NOSE…” He swallowed, staring at the ribbon. “AND I FEEL… BAD. THAT THIS IS LESS SCARY.”
“Don’t feel bad, we’re trying to make it less scary, so this was a successful experiment.”
Despite your words, Papyrus’s sockets had tears gathering in them. You frowned.
“You okay?” you asked. He sniffled and shook his head, wiping the tears away before they could leave his eyes.
“Hey, Papyrus, you don’t have to worry about me,” you consoled. “I’m okay right now. This is fine, and you’re fine, too.” You gave him a moment, and he just kept staring at your hands.
“Do you want to stop?” you asked as gently as you could.
Papyrus nodded, tears spilling over as he hurried over to the desk and gingerly brought the scissors to the bed, holding them like an unstable bomb.
You held up your wrists, and he found a safe place to cut the fabric. It fell away as he sat the scissors on the mattress and slid himself to the floor, once more curled up and holding himself.
You had to exercise your patience- you wanted to do something, you wanted there to be a tangible, real thing you could provide him that made him feel better. But there wasn’t, so you got up and threw your bounds away before sitting down beside him.
“I’M SORRY,” Papyrus cried.
“Hey, there’s nothing to be sorry for,” you said. You were still awkward and your words were a little strange, but this ‘open, vulnerable communication’ stuff was becoming more natural as time went on. “We tried something, and it didn’t work- but we still tried. I’m really proud of you.”
He raised his skull to wipe some tears. “IT JUST MADE ME SAD TO SEE YOU LIKE THAT,” he confessed. “IT WAS A GOOD IDEA, I JUST…”
“It just didn’t work,” you said firmly. “And that’s okay, it’s not because there’s anything wrong.” You sat against your bed and stared up at the ceiling, and then at the bird pictures Papyrus had helped you hang up. “Let’s workshop it, okay? I’ll try to think of more ideas, and you do the same. Does that sound like a plan?”
“YES, IT SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD PLAN,” he said. His tears were quick to dry this time, and that made you happy. “THANK YOU FOR… FOR BEING SO KIND. I’LL THINK ABOUT IT.”
“Cool, maybe you could ask Sans, too, if you want. He might have some thoughts.” You rubbed the carpet, liking the way it grounded you. “Oh, uh, also- you’re welcome. It’s what friends do.”
Papyrus smiled at the term.
Notes:
papyrus and reader might not be experts, but they are trying their fuckin best
also the birds are just birds near my house because those are the birds i know well. birds were my special interest when i was like 6-11 or so, i'd just check out bird encyclopedias and shit like that from the library and go through and read about all of the birds. these days i just like to be able to identify the ones i see irl!
Chapter Text
“What’s that one?”
"looks like orion's belt to me."
"What's that big bright one?"
"Venus."
You pointed to a random star and Sans laughed.
"now you're just fuckin' with me."
You smiled. You were. "I'm just impressed. For somebody who spent, like, 95% of his life not seeing a single star, you sure know a lot of them." Sans opened his mouth to reply but your brain kicked you a thought and you cut him off to say "Except your brother."
Sans blinked at you before he put your word jumble of a thought together and smiled in a sly sorta stinker fashion. "you think my bro is a star, huh?"
You smiled. "Well, yeah. You told me about him before I ever met him, and then I met him, and he's great."
"yeah, he really is," Sans agreed readily. He sighed and leaned back in the grass, looking up at the night sky. "glad we're on the same page, that just twinkles me pink."
"Was that supposed to be tickles?" you asked, already having laid down with your hands behind your head to observe. "Also, you guys blush blue. I've never seen you pink."
You felt a hand on your side and small, jabby skeleton fingers wiggled against you. You barked, laughing, and quickly shoved Sans's hands away, sitting up enough to glare at his mischievous expression.
"there, now you're pink for both of us. consider yourself twinkled."
You pouted and raised your hand, ready for payback... but you stopped. Sans noticed and his smile became strained.
"what, too scared to retaliate?" he tried to provoke, but you huffed and laid back down.
"Guess so. Don't pick on me for trying to be nice."
Sans didn't say anything as he, too, sat back and got comfortable in the grass. He kept his hands on his belly- which, true to his word, was starting to come back. He didn't keep it conjured all the time, and it seemed like it was Schroedinger's skeleton belly in that you couldn't ever see it, but it was nice to know he was looking more like he used to.
"sorry, you're right," Sans admitted. "it feels a little bad, but i appreciate the thought."
"I don't want to make you uncomfortable," you said, looking up at the stars and following the ones on the big dipper. There was a new moon tonight and you'd shut all the lights off, so you could see them really well. "Friendly platonic cuddles are one thing, but tickling feels... I dunno, almost attack-adjacent."
"well… just don't look at me like i'm still a scared dog and it's all good," he said.
Oh. Your chest burned at that, the hurt hitting too fast and too hard for you to control it. When you didn't reply, too frozen and unsure, Sans looked over and immediately jerked upright upon seeing your tears.
"woah, i'm sorry- hey, i'm- i didn't mean that-" he stuttered, hands up like he wanted to do something but didn't know what.
You sat up, but you felt like a deflated balloon. You turned your face away from him a little bit.
"Sorry... I’ll try not to-"
"no, hey, that wasn't on you," Sans cut you off, finally deciding on an action and putting a hand on your shoulder. "of course that made you upset, that fucking sucked."
You sniffled and looked over at him- his expression was tight with worry, guilt plainly written into it. He scooted a little closer, hand still on you.
"i didn't mean that, i'm sorry. i just kinda blurted it out and didn’t run it through my thick skull first."
"It's okay," you said, recovering, but Sans shook his head.
"nope, nah, it wasn't. you weren't lookin at me any different than somebody worried about their pal- i took it the wrong way and that's on me."
You let out a deep breath. The tension began to fade, and you leaned over and put your head on his shoulder even if he was significantly smaller than you.
"hey," he said, putting his arm around you. "don't worry about it, okay? you didn't do anything wrong, that one was my bad. full, one hundred percent, organically home-grown my bad."
You laughed a little. "Okay, I guess I can't argue with that."
"you really can't, i wouldn't allow it," he agreed. He laid back down, taking you with him, and now you were laying right beside each other like a couple of sardines in a can.
"You're good at conflict resolution," you said, once more looking at the night sky.
"when it ain't about me, i guess," he said. His hand found yours, looking over to make sure that the touch was okay. You took it and gave it a squeeze.
"... Just because I feel compelled to say it, I really, really don't think of you like that anymore," you said softly. Sans's hand tightened.
"i know you don't. i can feel it in that big ‘ol soul of yours all the time, i just... got insecure, i guess."
"You're allowed to get insecure."
"yeah, but i’m not allowed to say shit that makes you cry when you didn’t do anything wrong. that sucked. felt like i was having a heart attack."
"You don't have a heart."
"...so first i'm not allowed to be pink, now you're callin' me heartless... this just ain't my night."
You snorted, idly rubbing your thumb over the scars on Sans's wrists. The texture was almost pleasant. Sans didn't stop you- in fact, he relaxed his grip a little so you had easier access.
You stopped when you realized where the ‘texture’ had come from and why it’d be weird to touch it. "Was that okay?"
"yeah, feels kinda nice," he said, voice uncharacteristically gentle. "they're from handcuffs- it, uh... it feels a little like healing magic, minus the healing. comforting, somebody good at words would probably say."
You waited to make sure before going back to the motions. It was the first time he'd really addressed anything specific about... any of it. The indents weren't deep, but they were numerous. Like he'd been cuffed and uncuffed to varying degrees of pain many, many times.
"Is it alright if I look?" you asked. Sans didn't reply verbally, he just bent his arm up above the two of you so you could take his hand from a better angle. It was very dark, so you really couldn't see much, but you could now touch the marks with more than just your thumb.
"Was it when you were like this, or...?"
"once they got me to turn, i never turned back." Sans stared up at the sky. "i was a blaster for years, right up until you wore me down."
You made a sad noise. You didn't say sorry, because you'd said it dozens of times in the past, and he knew.
"When you did, was it because you wanted to find Papyrus?" you asked.
"kinda," he said. He lowered his wrist again to once more hold your hand. "but it was also because i trusted you."
"Really?" you asked, because you frankly didn't believe it.
"heh, yeah, don't sound so surprised," Sans joked, now taking his turn to put his skull on your shoulder. "you thought i was a dog, and people don't really hide much from their dogs. you were always so nice to me, didn't try to pet me, or 'work with me', or any of that shit. i could see how much you cared about me just... not hurting. and, yeah, that did kinda hurt in a different way and caused some real conflicting shit inside my rattled up skull, but eventually..." Sans sighed. "i guess i just had to know if it would keep not hurting. if i was me again."
You listened and you heard him. You didn't really have anything to say in reply, so you turned your head and kissed the top of his skull.
"heh, ew, human spit," he joked, but even in the dark you could see the blue across his face.
Sans went inside, finding his brother in their new, spacious bedroom. He was on the laptop, wearing the pair of glasses you'd bought him, the sides taped to his skull. It was silly, but Papyrus had been amazed at how much easier he could see things, so whatever kept them on.
"HOW WAS STAR GAZING?" he asked, looking up and setting the laptop aside. He'd declined the invite, saying he had important internet research to do. Sans hadn't questioned him- it was fine for him to have some time alone for any reason.
The smaller trudged over and flopped himself into Papyrus's lap, groaning.
"WERE THE STARS REALLY THAT DISAPPOINTING?" he asked, raising a hand and setting it on Sans's forehead.
"i made them cry, and it felt like when i used to make you cry over somethin’ stupid,” Sans grumbled.
Papyrus gave his skull a rub before picking him up and sitting him more upright in his lap so he could hold him more fully with his arm.
"I ASSUME YOU DIDN'T JUST LEAVE THEM OUT THERE IN TEARS?"
"no, it's all good, they even gave me a gross be-lipped head smooch," Sans said. He was joking, but the whole event had made him realize how very, very deeply he cared for the human who'd so readily taken him and his brother in. And, if he was being honest with himself, it kinda scared him.
"I'M NOT SURE I UNDERSTAND THE DRAMATICS, THEN, BROTHER," Papyrus said, brow raised. "IS SOMETHING WRONG?"
"no, and that's the problem," he said. He leaned back into Papyrus, needing to know that he was there. "i... kinda thought, y'know, if we ever hear anything about the others... that i'd be fine leaving."
"AH," Papyrus uttered. “I THINK I UNDERSTAND.”
"now i just... don't know what i'd do." Sans took Papyrus's hand, which he'd drawn away from the keyboard to offer. "i want to find the others, if... if they're still out there, but how could i leave this one alone, y'know?"
"IT'D BE THEIR CHOICE!" Papyrus said. "OBVIOUSLY WE MIGHT WANT TO FIND OUR FRIENDS, IF WE DISCOVER WHERE THEY MIGHT BE, AND IF THEY TRULY DIDN'T WANT TO BE ALONE... I THINK THEY'D JUST COME WITH US."
"or invite them all here." Sans laughed. "that seems like something they'd do."
"IT DOES, DOESN'T IT?" Papyrus mused. He was quiet for a moment, then he sighed. "WAS A KISS FROM SOMEBODY WITH LIPS EVERYTHING I'VE EVER DREAMED IT WOULD BE?"
"how would i know, i don't know what you dream wet lip kisses would be like," Sans teased.
"WELL, FOR STARTERS-"
"actually, i don't think i want to," he cut his brother off, making Papyrus scoff in faux-anger. He chuckled, relaxing into his brother's lap to be more comfortable. "you'll just have to keep at it and find out yourself."
"I... I SUPPOSE YOU'RE RIGHT!" Papyrus said. There was a bit of hesitancy in his voice that Sans was still getting used to being so damn present, but he smiled.
"always am. use it as a motivator- a kiss is the final reward."
"SO YOU'VE REACHED MAXIMUM FRIENDSHIP WITH THEM, THEN?" Papyrus asked coyly. "THAT WAS YOUR FINAL REWARD?"
"no, it'll be your final reward," Sans mumbled. “mine’ll be a big cake or something.”
"SURE, SURE! YOUR SKULL IS A LITTLE BLUE, BROTHER, ARE YOU FEELING ALRIGHT?"
"can it." Sans pulled the hood of his jacket up over his skull, yanking the drawstrings tight. "your sockets aren't workin' right, i'm white as a bone. you're just jealous."
"YES, OBVIOUSLY! AND YOU'RE EASILY FLUSTERED BY HUMAN-SMOOCHES! WHICH IS VERY FUNNY COMING FROM MR. UN-FLUSTER-ABLE HIMSELF!"
Sans groaned. He snuggled into Papyrus's lap in the jabbiest, least comfortable way possible, ignoring his brother's protests and making himself a nuisance in retaliation.
Brotherly banter and teasing was a much missed, dearly cherished past-time.
Notes:
i still don't plan on putting any romance in this fic (mostly because i just don't want to and it'd be a little bit of a weird power dynamic, but also partly because how the fuck would i pick which skeleton would be Romanced??) but god damn these bitches gay!! if gay means "loving and ready to show it with physical affection" which it doesn't
reader has been trying so so hard to just treat the brothers normally, while still keeping in mind the horrible stuff they went through, so Sans's remark (a half-joke made on a subject that maybe shouldn't be joked about) was taken as well as somebody takes getting hit by a truck- if Sans hadn't immediately apologized they wouldn't have said a word, knowing he's going through a lot, but words still hurt even if they're justified 3 reader is once again, sadly and unfortunately, only human 3
Chapter 20
Notes:
short and sweet, no hurts no pains to be seen
Chapter Text
When you proposed “family dinner nights” as a normal domestic activity for the three of you, Sans and Papyrus were on board without a moment’s pause.
“WE NEVER REALLY HAD A FAMILY DINNER NIGHT… IT WAS ONLY EVER THE TWO OF US! WE ATE TOGETHER ALL THE TIME!”
“or i ate the leftovers of whatever you cooked way too early for me to wake up and eat,” Sans added. The two were sitting at the dining room table, which hadn’t seen much use since you’d become the house’s solo resident. You were in the kitchen.
“I think it’d be nice,” you said, stirring a pot with Alfredo sauce simmering inside. The pasta was draining in the sink, and the shrimp were almost done- it’d been a while since you’d had a ‘reason’ to make something fancy.
“whatever you’ve got cookin’ over there sure smells nice,” Sans said, watching you with thinly veiled hunger.
“I AGREE!” Papyrus said. It’d been a little less than a month since he’d entered the equation, and he was so much more outspoken than before. “I USED TO TAKE COOKING LESSONS FROM UNDYNE- MY FRIEND- BUT I THINK SHE MAYBE WASN’T VERY GOOD AT COOKING,” Papyrus admitted. “BUT IF I MAKE DINNER ONCE A WEEK, I’M SURE I’LL IMPROVE!”
“I can help, if you want- I’m no master chef, but I know a few things. And the internet is a helpful tool.” You left the sauce for a moment and flipped the shrimp around. “Uh, not that I’d ever replace your friend.”
Papyrus's sockets softened "OF COURSE NOT, BUT I THINK IT'D BE FINE TO HAVE TWO COOKING INSTRUCTORS. WHEN I FIND UNDYNE, I'M SURE SHE'LL BE NOTHING BUT THRILLED AT MY PROGRESS." He looked at the wall for a moment before visibly shaking himself from his thoughts. "BUT YES, HELP WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED. I MIGHT NEED IT WITH THE. UHM. THE LACK OF A TOOL THAT I AM MAYBE NOT VERY USED TO NOT HAVING AT THIS TIME." He still didn’t look fully comfortable addressing his missing arm directly, not all the time, but you couldn’t blame him for that.
You smiled. "Sounds great, I've never had somebody to help me cook before."
"so what kinda split we talkin' about?" Sans asked, arms on the table and using his folded hands as a resting spot for his skull. "if you're making some and helping rus with his, too, i don't want you to burn yourself out."
Papyrus groaned at the silly pun. You huffed in amusement but waved his concern away.
"No, I've been wanting to cook more homemade stuff for myself, it just always felt like a lot when it was only for me," you explained as you picked up the strainer, gave it a shake, and then upturned it into your Alfredo pot. The shrimp followed a moment later. "Papyrus, you're always welcome to help me with my dinners, too. I figure we can do three nights a week, if you want to do one or two?" you asked Sans, stirring your creation. "It isn't a hard rule or anything, and I figure we'll still order pizza at least once a week. And leftovers go a long way."
"i'm good doin' two, as long as we ain't talkin a nine course meal," he answered.
"AND I WILL GLADLY HELP WITH YOURS IF YOU HELP WITH MINE!" Papyrus added with a thumbs up.
You grabbed an oven mitt and some plates and forks and sat them on the table. Sans would've been licking his lips if he had lips to lick or a tongue to lick with. You slid him his silverware with a coy smile.
"Can skeletons drool? You look pretty close to it."
"c'mon, don't be like that," Sans joked, "it's a compliment. your pasta stuff smells good enough to eat."
"WHY WOULDN'T IT?" Papyrus chided. "I'M NOT SURE OF THAT JOKE… IT LACKS SUSTENANCE… IT LACKS A BACKBONE ."
Sans laughed, in the fun little 'heh heh' way he did, and you rolled your eyes and made the trip to and back from the kitchen with the pot.
"Well, bone app the teeth, as they say," you said as you sat it down, taking a seat at the head of the table with Sans and Papyrus on either side.
"THEY DO NOT! NOBODY SAYS THAT!" Papyrus exclaimed. You could only smile at his boisterous volume- the two of you had come a long way in a short amount of time, for him to be comfortable yelling at you.
"uh, we clearly do," Sans said as he grabbed the spoon and put a big 'ol dollop of shrimp Alfredo penne on his plate. "are you callin' us nobodies?"
"I'M CALLING YOU INCORRECT!"
You really liked this. When had you gotten so lonely? Had you always been that way, deep down, just unwilling to acknowledge it? Sans and Papyrus had made you realize how monotonous and dreary your days before had been. It made you appreciate the days now so much more.
"oh, wow. fuck. this is great," Sans said with a mouthful of noodles. "you tellin' me a shrimp alfredo'd these noodles?" You almost choked on your own food at his idiotic joke clearly parroted from an internet post.
"IT'S DELICIOUS, MY BROTHER'S STUPID WORDS ASIDE," Papyrus added between bites. His sockets were big and happy. "THANK YOU FOR MAKING IT FOR US."
"Hey, no problem," you said, cheeks warm. "I'm glad you guys like it, we'll put it in the 'family dinner night' rotation." You'd waited until they had helped themselves before taking some for yourself. You'd prepared more than you anticipated needing, because you loved leftovers.
Sans gave a mumbled agreement, way too absorbed in his pasta for much more than that. Papyrus took things a little slower, but he was putting a hurting on his helping, too.
This was different. This was better.
Chapter 21
Notes:
whoever ordered the number 6 meal (fluff, side of fluff, recovery and fluff) here's your food
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You sat on the living room floor and Papyrus sat a foot in front of you. You were facing one another while Sans sat on the couch nearby, loudly crunching some chips.
"You just say something if you want to stop," you said. "It's fine to take a break."
Papyrus nodded. He was nervous about this latest step- he was going to touch your hands.
You gave him a smile and closed your eyes, scooting a little closer and holding your hand out, palm up, in the middle of the space between you.
For a while, there was nothing. You didn't let it phase you- he could take all the time he needed. After about thirty seconds, a hesitant finger touched the middle of your upturned palm.
You smiled and had to stop from drawing away. In response, the touch halted.
"OH, I'M SORRY, WAS THAT...?" Papyrus worried.
"i think you tickled 'em, pap," Sans said with laughter in his voice. You nodded.
"It's fine, really! It just tickles a little, you can keep going like that."
Papyrus didn't say anything. You kept your eyes closed- he'd said that it would be better.
A big, skinny, gentle hand was laid on the underside of yours. You stopped yourself from beaming like a goober in pride, keeping it to an idly content grin.
Papyrus used his thumb to poke at the flesh around your palm. His hand was shaking. The contact lasted a few seconds before he drew away again with a huff.
"see, ain't it weird?" Sans commented, followed by a loud chip munch. "it's just bones under there."
"Muscles and ligaments and stuff, too," you added, keeping your hand right where it was. This was a big thing for Papyrus, and you wanted to make him as comfortable as possible.
"IT... IT IS A LITTLE WEIRD, I'LL ADMIT," he said. Another moment passed and his hand returned, holding the ends of your fingers and pressing softly into the digits. It was a little sensitive, but he wasn't hurting you in the slightest- you could tell Papyrus was taking the utmost care in being gentle.
"Skeleton fingers are weird to me, honestly," you commented. "I get worried something is wrong because of how skinny your hands are, but then I remember they're just like that. It's really cool, though."
Papyrus hummed, continuing his exploration with little breaks in between. He went over each finger and then slowly turned your hand over to rub around your knuckles.
"MY FINGERS AREN'T TOO HARD AND POKEY?" Papyrus asked.
"Nope, they might be harder and pokier than human fingers, but you're being very gentle."
"W-WELL, OF COURSE! THE LAST THING I'D WANT TO DO IS HURT YOUR SQUISHY, SOFT CONSTITUTION!"
"Thanks," you said with a big smile.
"you wanna let them have a go?" Sans asked. Papyrus hesitated, drawing his hand away, but he let out a deep breath.
"OKAY. KEEP YOUR EYES CLOSED, PLEASE?" he asked sheepishly.
"I won't peak, Sans is on eye-watch."
"i've got my sockets peeled, ready to flag a foul if i see anything suspicious."
Papyrus gave a shaky laugh before he took a few deep breaths. You sat your hand on your thigh, palm upturned, as you waited for him to feel ready.
"OKAY, H. HERE."
He laid his hand in yours. It was shaking.
"Are you doing okay?" you asked. "We can take a break if you want to."
"NO, I-I'M OKAY. GO AHEAD."
You nodded, your eyes still shut tight.
"I'll just use one hand, that seems fair," you said, and with that you brought your thumb around and touched the strange, foreign bones of his hand.
Papyrus shuddered, but he stayed where he was. You found one of the bones that ran from wrist to fingertip and rubbed along it, hoping that the motion was soothing.
"I never even think about these bones, this is cool," you mumbled. They were skinny and hard, and as you moved from bone to bone you noticed chips or scars in the texture, but you ignored it.
"Can I touch your fingers?" you asked. Papyrus's shaking had died down to some degree.
"ya couldn't see it, but he nodded," Sans gave the play-by-play from the couch.
"SORRY, YES, GO AHEAD," Papyrus tittered.
And you did. They were hard, and they were pokey, but they were also new and fascinating. The fingers were long and slender, and you could feel the spaces between the bigger bones. You rubbed in little circles over the joints and lengths, taking in how alien Papyrus was but still like you in many, many ways.
You withdrew your hand, all smiles and warmth.
"Okay, I've done enough skeletal explorations for the day. Can I open my eyes?"
"Y. YES, GO AHEAD."
You did, seeing Papyrus's blue-flushed skull... and stray tears in the corners of his sockets that hadn't quite fallen.
"Are you okay? Was that too much?" you asked, but Papyrus shook his head to stop your worrying. It dislodged the tears, but he brought his hand up to wipe them away. He looked at it, afterwards.
"NO, IT WAS JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT. I'M ALRIGHT!" he said, his words a little forcefully upbeat. True to his word, though, he didn't sound upset.
"hey, great job, rus," Sans said from the couch. You saw him laying down, stray chip crumbs on the cushion, watching in lazy interest. It made you feel good to know he wasn't worried about you hurting Papyrus in the slightest.
"Yeah, that was a really good start," you added. "Your hand and fingers are so much bigger than Sans's-" you ignored his half-hearted protest- "so it's cool to feel them."
Papyrus put his hand in his lap, looking away as he went a shade bluer. He was smiling.
Notes:
I think they do this whenever Papyrus wants to, and I think he wants to almost every day :] tiny, consistent baby steps go a long way!!
Chapter 22
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
You didn't want to say anything about the check-in, but you knew you'd have to eventually. Becky had called about it and you'd set one up for five weeks after your "adoption" of the latest monster, but now it was three days away and you had to give them time to prepare.
Sans presented you with your dinner- stir fry. He liked to play cool and composed, you'd figured out, but you could tell he was a little bit proud of himself and the effort he'd put into it.
"i won't say the thing about boning the apple teeth since somebody-" he shot a look at Papyrus, who sat across from you- "hates fun and whimsy."
"I DO NOT!" he protested, but Sans waved him away as he put your plate down and then slid Papyrus's over to him. The cook got to sit at the head of the table- none of you seemed to care that much about seating arrangements, but it was nice to sit at the head and pretend you were the ruler of the court.
"anyways, yours has chicken," he said to you as he walked back to the kitchen to get his own plate, "and yours is all veggies," he said to his brother.
You'd already started eating, table manners forgotten in the wake of such yummy-smelling food. "It's really good, thank you," you said after you swallowed the first bite. Brown rice, soy sauce, chicken- three components of a happy life. You eyed Sans's plate- no veggies for himself- and then Papyrus's.
"no prob, i saw a recipe i wanted to try, and i don't want to try stuff very often," Sans said as he started into his own food.
"YOU'VE BEEN TRYING, THOUGH, AND THAT'S WHAT MATTERS!" Papyrus praised, smiling. He had been so much happier lately- you felt terrible about the news you had to break.
Sans 'aw, jeez'd' as you put up a hand to hide your whisper to the tall skeleton across the way.
"Psst, speaking of trying, can I have a piece of broccoli?"
Papyrus nodded and carefully scooped up a piece on his fork- he was getting very good at manipulating food one-handed- and deposited it on your plate.
"oh, shit, did you want veggies too?" Sans asked. His perma-smile faltered slightly.
"Oh, no, this is great!" you reassured him, spearing the broccoli and eating it. "I just wanted to try a green thing."
"AND I'M HAPPY TO SHARE!"
The smile returned in earnest. "well, what's the verdict on the green thing?"
"It's great, chef," you said around a mouthful of rice and vegetables.
"I'M HONESTLY IMPRESSED, BROTHER," Papyrus added, a soft smile on his own face as he looked down at the food. "YOU'RE STILL VERY LAZY AND SLEEP TOO MUCH, IN MY OPINION, BUT YOU DID A GOOD JOB WITH THIS!"
"heh, stop it, you're makin' me blush," Sans mumbled. "i'm frying my best out here, so it's rice to be appreciated."
"AH. NEVERMIND." Papyrus's voice was cold but he was fighting a smile.
“I think that one was pretty clever, actually,” you chimed in.
“thanks, pal,” Sans said with a cheeky grin even as Papyrus beat the table with his fork-clutching fist.
“DON’T ENCOURAGE HIM!”
It was a shame to break the peaceful evening air. You sat on the arm chair, messing around on your phone and watching Sans and Papyrus play video games. Well- they were doing an exercise in synchronicity and, half of the controller a piece, they were attempting to beat Pokemon. It was very fun, but Papyrus was getting frustrated, so they quit before he took it out on their little pocket monsters.
“YOU ARE IMPOSSIBLE TO ‘GAME’ WITH, BROTHER,” Papyrus pouted. “WE COULD HAVE BEATEN THAT GYM IF YOU HADN’T MADE CELERY BIRD USE ‘SWORD OF DANCE’ SEVEN TIMES!”
“we needed the attack boost,” Sans explained with a mischievous smile.
“IT MAXES OUT AT THREE!”
“uh, so? what if it got lowered again? i was bein’ prepared.”
“YOU WERE BEING A CLOWN!” Papyrus shouted, and Sans chuckled. You did, too, well aware of Sans’s big brother antics. Papyrus pointed at you. “DON’T LAUGH, HE PERFORMED SO POORLY THAT YOU HAVE TO BE MY PLAYER TWO NEXT TIME!”
“Hey, that’s not a punishment, I like Pokemon,” you said to wave away his threat. “But we’re not using a Farfetch’d, that one sucks.”
“FINE! WE HAVE REACHED AN AGREEMENT, THEN!”
You smiled, and Papyrus returned it with twice the intensity. Sans had already deposited his half of the controller on the coffee table and laid back on the couch.
You knew you had to, but you still didn’t want to.
“So, uh… I gotta talk to you guys,” you murmured, locking your phone and setting it on the arm of the chair.
“bout what?” Sans asked, perking up a little, your tone obviously dour enough to give away the nature of the conversation.
“... Becky’s coming in three days,” you admitted with a huff. “She called a while ago to schedule a ‘check-in’ and… yeah,” you finished lamely.
Your statement was met with complete and utter silence. You winced- yeah, that’d been about what you’d expected. You looked up to see Sans looking at Papyrus, who was staring directly at the floor.
“I didn’t want to tell you guys way in advance and make you both anxious, I hope three days was enough time to, uh… prepare. I can keep you guys in the loop from now on if you’d like, uhm…”
Papyrus didn’t move. Sans seemed upset, but a lot less so. He gave you a look before putting a hand on his brother’s knee.
“you okay, pap?”
“W-WE’LL HAVE TO TURN BACK?” he asked. His gaze didn’t falter.
“I’m sorry…I wish there was a way around it, but I’m worried about them getting suspicious or something if I try to hide you guys… I mean, obviously it’s up to you, I’m not going to force you into anything-”
“no, you’re right, it makes sense to keep pretendin’ for them,” Sans mumbled, still touching his brother gently. “do ya think you can handle it, bro?”
Papyrus’s reply wasn’t immediate, so you jumped in.
“They usually only last like ten minutes, and she’s not going to try and touch you- she didn’t try to touch Sans last time. I’ll be here and try to get her in and out as fast as I can.”
The taller skeleton took a deep breath, still shaking, and nodded. He gave you a quick glance before taking Sans’s hand.
“OKAY. THANK YOU FOR NOT TELLING ME,” he said earnestly.
“yeah, ‘preciate the thought, but i’d like to stay up to date,” Sans commented. He didn’t look upset beyond what his brother’s state caused, and you confirmed with a thumbs up.
“I will. I wasn’t super sure about this time, since… since it’s kinda the first time with the both of you here, but yeah.”
Sans acknowledged you with a look before going back to his brother. Papyrus was definitely scared and you hated that you had to play a role in it, even if it wasn’t your fault.
“we’ll get through it, rus, don’t sweat it,” Sans comforted. “if lil ‘ol me can do it alone, we can do it together no problem, yeah?”
“R. RIGHT! RIGHT.” Papyrus didn’t sound sure of it in the slightest. He held Sans’s hand a moment longer before letting go and touching his face, boney fingers trailing along the gash.
You frowned and looked away.
Notes:
the fact a check-in was bound to happen was brought up and would you look at the time! angst o'clock- but also updates are gonna be slower, the wrists are being cringe and writing is frustrating while wearing a brace on each hand TT_TT
sorry all of my fanfictions inevitably contain a skeleton playing pokemon. you know how it is, with the curse and all
Chapter 23
Notes:
me: "my wrist hurty, slower updates"
me like a day later: "so i downloaded a speech to text program on my tablet to facilitate skeleton fanfiction because i'm a little bit silly about these three!" (reader is an honorary skeleton now)that being said, if there are more errors than usual please feel free to point that out, i proofread but i'm sure i'll miss one of the instances of the tablet hearing "sam's" or "science" when i talk about the older, fatter skeleton in this story
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You could tell that Papyrus was upset, but there was absolutely nothing you could do to make him feel better. That made you feel worse.
He was definitely avoiding you as much as he could, and even if you didn't blame him, it was still rough. Even Sans seemed to be having issues getting through to him. At least the elder of the brothers seemed to be handling the situation somewhat decently. You weren't sure if it was because he was genuinely not phased, or if he was trying to be strong for Papyrus. Sure, he'd been through it a few times already, but it still sucked. It sucked for you, even, and all you had to do was lie. Okay, Sans would be annoyed if he caught you saying that- you had to say a lot of things about your friends that were wildly dehumanizing and profoundly untrue. Pretending like they were dogs hurt so much that Becky might as well be coming to brand you.
Between that pretending and genuinely being cool about the visit, there was no doubt that you were doing the former. If you could make things even the tiniest, most microscopic amount better for either of the monsters that lived with you, you'd do it if the only cost was your emotional state. That could be fixed later. You weren't going to bottle things up anymore in an attempt to make yourself seem more put together than you were- but this was different, you reasoned, because it was so much more intense and concentrated into a small amount of time. Once the check-in was over and you knew for sure that your friends were okay, it'd be time for you to process things. Before then, you would be okay. They needed you to be okay for this.
“hey,” Sans greeted as he came into the living room. It was the day before the impending event and emotional turmoil. You were trying not to take Papyrus's avoidance personally, and you were doing a good job, but you really wished he would let you help him. Even if that was just by talking. But, then again, talking might not help and there might not be anything that could help. But that option sucked, so you would ignore it.
“Hey,” you said in reply. There was an air of melancholy that was hard to get past. It was getting later in the day and you had yet to see Papyrus at all. It seemed like he'd holed himself up in his room and was just trying to get through the hours until the check-in.
Sans sat down on the couch beside you with a huff. The one good thing about the sad state of the house was that you had a lot of time to work on… well, work. You were trying to do more than usual so that you could pay for more things for your new roommates, and it honestly wasn't hard. You had kind of just been doing enough to get by, so adding on a couple hours a day to make more money wasn't an issue. Especially when nobody was talking and a horrible event loomed over the three of you. You had a little else to focus on that didn't make your heart hurt.
“so, when's she coming?” Sans asked quietly.
“She said one in the afternoon, and they've always been punctual, so.” Your eyes drifted to the doorway like they could see the stairs beyond, and the skeleton in his room above you. "Do you think he'll be okay?"
“i really hope so. he's pretty shaken up, and i don't know for sure why." Sans held up his hands. “i mean, beyond what i'd expect is the baseline shaken up- which is already a lot. i know that you and my bro have talked about… stuff." Sans's eyes fell. "i'm really glad he's got you to talk to about the shit he doesn't want to tell me, but… a guy can't help but worry."
You looked at him and saw the way his hands clutched the couch cushion he sat on. Before you could reply, he went on:
"don't get me wrong, i don't want you to spill the beans if there are beans to be spilled,“ Sans said. "i want him to have things he doesn't tell me, and i'm glad it's not just the two of us trying to deal with this, but i get the feeling…" Sans closed his sockets, "that he maybe had it a lot worse than I did. and that maybe it's because he's a better person than i'll ever be and didn't... give up. "
“I don't think you can compare yourselves like that, that's beyond apples to oranges. That's like… apples to raw beef." Your words elicited a much needed laugh out of the skeleton beside you. "Seriously, though. I won't lie and say he hasn't told me anything in private, but I also won't lie and say it's valid to say either one of you deserved what happened more or less than the other. Neither of you did. I agree that your brother is great, but so are you." You raised an eyebrow. "And- uh, you didn't give up. You're here, aren't you?"
Sans’s tension partially melted as his smile grew at the floor before he turned it to you. "sometimes that word vomit you talk about so much just happens to land on the floor and make the most eloquent barf splat i've ever heard," Sans said, his words gentle despite the horrible picture they painted.
"Thanks... I think. It's like that saying about sitting a bunch of monkeys down on typewriters and eventually they'll write a Shakespeare play- if I say enough eventually some of it'll be good."
"...what the hell are you talking about? that's not seriously a thing people say, right?" Sans looked equal parts disgusted and impressed. “actually, i hope it is, cause if you made that up on the spot i’d be a lil bit worried.”
You gave him a playful shove with all the strength of a newborn kitten. "I'm surprised you know who Shakespeare is. Did a lot of human literature find its way down there?" You ignored his questioning of the phrase- you definitely hadn't conjured it out of thin air, but god help you if a murderer had you at gunpoint and asked you to name the source.
"mostly the kind in a physically sturdy form. it's hard for a book to stay together on a river ride, but you'd be surprised how well a dvd stands up." Sans grinned. "the single celebrity we had down under was a big fan of romeo and juliet. go figure. he was… a lot."
"That's the sexy rectangle, right?"
Sans shivered. "that's the one. i take it my brother's already talked to you about him, so i'll spare you the details."
You sat in the calm, the conversation nearly driving the anxiety from your mind. Sans’s hand had relaxed as he shoved both in the pockets of his shorts.
"We got really off topic really fast, didn't we?" you asked. Sans chuckled and scooted over to sit against your side. It was starting to feel like he belonged there, even if he was a little bit too angular to be the perfect cuddle buddy.
"eh, i could use the distraction,” he said with a shrug that you felt against you. You put an arm around his shoulder and drew him closer.
You talked about Mettaton and his iconic cooking segments until it was time for dinner.
When Papyrus finally came down the stairs, you could tell he hadn't slept and had definitely been crying. You were honestly surprised he was there for dinner, but you weren't about to question it. It was a leftovers night, and you gave the reclusive monster a smile as he entered the kitchen like a mouse sneaking by a sleepy cat. His clothes were wrinkled and his posture poor.
“hey, just in time for reheated s’ghetti,” Sans greeted. The groan his words elicited was lacking in substance, but hey, it was there.
“I HAVE TWO LETTER P’S IN MY NAME AND THEY ARE BY FAR THE MOST MEMORABLE CONSONANTS, PLEASE DON’T REMOVE THEM FROM WORDS.” Papyrus reprimanded. He walked over and stood beside his brother, ready for his s’ghetti to be doled out.
“what if i start callin’ you ayrus? can i do it then?” Sans asked, plopping some wet noodles onto a plate.
“Ayy, Rus,” you said without really thinking about it, your brain going on autopilot to parrot internet videos nobody but you had ever seen. You hadn’t even looked up from your cupboard digging, so Papyrus’s laughter surprised you. And delighted you.
“nah, i’m thinkin more like ‘aye-aye, captain’ vibes,” Sans continued, stifling laughter himself. You found your favorite mug in the very back of the cupboard and frowned, about ready to get up on your tip-toes to try and knock it into range, but then a skeleton was at your side.
“CAN I HELP YOU GET THAT?” Papyrus asked a little nervously. His sockets met your eyes for just a moment before he looked away. “I’M STILL GREAT AT BEING TALL. AND- AND CUP RETRIEVAL IS EASY ONE-HANDED BUSINESS.” His smile was small. "THE HANDLE MAKES IT EVEN EASIER."
He was sad, and anxious, but he was still trying. You stepped back and waved him into the spot you’d just left.
“Aye aye, captain.”
Thankfully he still got your mug down, but not without a deeply disapproving eye roll. It didn’t have quite the effect it would have if things weren’t as they currently were, but still. It was nice to know he had it in him despite everything.
“can we get you a hook for a-”
“NO!” Papyrus shouted back at his brother, but he was clearly amused.
Notes:
look, things aren't too bad! i'm sure next chapter will be FINE! in the words of everybody's favorite my little pony parody fansong featuring concerning incestuous implications-
"it'll be okay~"
Chapter 24
Notes:
this one got pretty long pretty fast
go vote on a new name for my oc (previously Red from Little Red) please thank you i love you
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Papyrus wanted to be alone when he shifted. It was twenty minutes until the scheduled trauma time and you stayed with Sans on the living room floor while Papyrus went to the downstairs restroom.
Everything had been discussed- notepad and pen on the bathroom floor, keep the visit as quick as possible, play the role for Becky. Sans and Papyrus were going to lay in the dog bed together- you were going to say how much better Sans was now that he had another monster around. You'd say that 'Rib' was still shy, but making strides in the right direction. If all went well, the employee of the animal rescue would be in and out in no time at all.
You rubbed along San's spine where it met the back of his ribs, trying to be soothing. He'd taken off his clothes and had a blanket over him. He was shaking, but when you recalled how bad it had been when Papyrus arrived, you were proud of the progress he'd made in coping.
"You should learn morse code for when you can't talk," you suggested. It made him exhale sharply, but he didn't laugh.
"i'll look into it." He was sitting against the couch, blanket drawn around him. His hand slipped free of the covers and found yours- you took it without hesitation and gave it a squeeze. Still so small and fragile, but no longer strange.
"Everything is going to be alright. I'll make sure nothing bad happens to either of you," you said softly. "I know it sucks. I'm really sorry."
Sans swallowed and nodded. He looked at the clock- eighteen minutes. He winced and moved his weight to his hands and knees, letting go of your hand. He braced himself- he was so small. Small, and hurt, and... yours, legally speaking. You didn't want that last part to be true, and it made you feel sick, so it wasn’t true. He was your friend. You would keep him safe even if it meant fist-fighting the Positive Paws lady.
"k-keep rubbin' my back?" he asked in a mumble. His sockets were shut tight, sweat beaded on his skull and tears threatening the corners of his sockets.
"Okay. I'm here."
Sans whined, and he tensed and shook for a second. His body lit up and filled the room with blue-tinted magic for a few seconds. You felt the bones shift under your hand but didn't remove it.
Sans fell onto the floor, shifted and crying. You stopped petting him and wiped one of the tears away.
"Everything is alright. I'm here, Sans, you're safe. I'll beat up anybody that looks at you funny."
Sans looked up at you, his face so much different like this, and his mouth twitched. He made a low, rumbly noise- it took you a second to place it as a laugh and not a growl. You smiled, putting a hand on his long, ridged skull.
"What, you don't think I could?" you asked with a smile.
Sans shook his head as he heaved himself to his four feet, long tail flicking.
"Rude," you pouted. He gave you a look, and maybe he thought about what sort of banter he’d throw back if he could… then the good cheer was gone. He whined a little and went to the dog bed that had been dug out of the closet. It had seemed like it made them both upset, so it had been hidden until today.
You watched him go before standing up yourself, heart heavy and aching.
"Take a breather, I'm gonna go check on Papyrus, okay?"
Sans grumbled a noise of acknowledgement before he laid down on the bed, head on his paws, and closed his sockets.
God, what a mess. You'd give anything to not have to do this, but you couldn't think of a scenario that didn't involve faking their deaths- and that seemed like it would take more planning and conniving than you had in you at the moment. It wasn't off the table, but it was up to Sans and Papyrus.
You knocked on the bathroom door and heard shuffling as a response. It wasn't latched, and you didn't push it open.
"You okay in there, Papyrus? They'll be here in fifteen-ish minutes. Tap for yes?"
There wasn't a sound. You stood, agony setting into your heart, but swallowed it down.
"Can I come in? Tap for yes."
You thought that he wasn’t going to do anything. You held your breath, but after a pause, he tapped the floor loud enough for you to hear. You braced yourself and slowly eased open the door.
Papyrus was shifted, cowering half behind the toilet. He was way too big to fit, but he looked like he was trying his best. His long, barrel-shaped chest was moving rapidly, and he watched you with scared sockets as you took a step into the room.
"Hey, Papyrus, it's okay," you said. Oh, it hurt so much, but you kept yourself composed as you sat down by the door, not wanting to get too close. "Do you want me to get Sans?"
He shook his head fast enough to startle you, nearly losing his balance in the process. He whimpered, refusing to open his sockets as he cried.
"Okay, I won't," you breathed. You didn't understand why, but you wouldn't second-guess him. "Is it okay if I stay here with you?"
For a while, his shaking was the only movement. Then he nodded just a little, opening his eyes a sliver to see you.
"I know this sucks, dude, and I'm really sorry," you said. You kept your voice as soft and gentle as you could. It wasn't hard since all you wanted to do was wrap him up in a blanket and make him feel whole again. "But- but we're both here, and we won't let anything bad happen. I won't let anything bad happen," you repeated to him what you'd said to his brother. "You're safe, okay? You're safe here, and you're still Papyrus. No matter what anybody says or does."
His sockets went wide with the statement like he'd never even considered it to be true. He locked his gaze with yours, pupils flickering as they desperately searched.
"You're still my friend."
He began crying harder. He put his head down, whining for a moment, before he took a few deep, wobbly breaths. He was so different from the skeleton you’d seen him as every day you’d known him but one. But it was still Papyrus, and he was scared, and you’d be there for him.
He calmed a little bit, claws clacking on the tile floor as he wiggled out from his hiding spot, nearly tripping without his foreleg. He whined and stood, head above your hips, as you backed out of the bathroom to lead the way into the living room.
Papyrus staggered, but found his stride in only a few paces. He froze when he saw Sans in the dog bed, a full-body shudder going through him, but he pressed on.
They laid against each other. Sans put his skull under Papyrus's and fell into his side, tail tucked around his brother. Pap whined and curled up tighter, leaning into Sans's presence.
This sucked. You breathed for a few moments to get your bearings before you looked up- ten minutes. You walked to the couch and sat down.
"Alright, we've got just a little bit of time. I'll put on some TV, you guys shouldn't have to do anything except maybe get up and say hi..." You clenched your hands into fists- this wasn't fair and they shouldn't have to do this. You had to let your anger burn and die before you grabbed the remote.
"Hang in there. We'll get through this."
None of you had much of a choice.
You once more got up and waited at the door for Becky to arrive. She was in the same van as she had been when they dropped Papyrus off, and you felt your stomach turn as you saw it pull into the driveway.
"She's here," you said just loud enough for the two in the living room to catch. There wasn't a response, but you hadn't expected there to be. You composed yourself before opening the door, a big fake smile on your face as you went on to the small step of the front porch and greeted Becky as she got out of the car and waved at you.
"Good afternoon!" She looked the same as she had every other time you'd seen her, the same uniform and happy attitude as before. It was a stark difference from how you felt inside.
"Hi, it's good to see you," you said. You were getting pretty good at this acting thing, but you hoped you wouldn't have to continue the path much longer. You weren't suited for the stage, but you moved out of the doorway and motioned for Becky to come inside regardless.
"So how are they doing?" Becky asked. "I know you said over the phone that they were both doing well- is there anything I should know before I see them?"
"No, not really. Just the usual- they still don't like to be touched, so I haven't been, uh… doing that- unless they seek it out. Tib is better than his new friend," you withheld the use of the word brother, "but they're both physically healing well."
"Oh, that's so good to hear!" Becky clapped her hands gently, a sincere grin on her face. It felt wrong to be deceiving her as you were, but there was no way to know what her reaction would be to learning the truth. You wouldn't risk Sans or Papyrus's safety to find out.
"They were in the living room, last I saw them. Come on in, you can leave your shoes on if you'd like." You led the way into the dining room that connected to the small entrance area, taking a deep breath to prepare for the introduction of the skeletons into this encounter.
"It's all right, I wouldn't want to get these clean floors dirty, you do such a good job keeping this place tidy." Becky had already leaned over to untie her sneakers and was kicking them off in just a few moments. She stood back to full height with her hands on her hips. She was a short and wiry woman, maybe in her mid-thirties, and she really did seem nice. "As usual, I'll try to keep this brief. We already know that you're great with these kinds of rescues, I don't doubt for a second they found the perfect home with you."
"I understand, I don't mind." You stilled your heart at the words and the terrible storm of emotions it started in you. Perfect home? Far from it, and yet… Putting that aside, you walked into the living room with a quick glance over your shoulder to make sure the woman was following you.
Sans and Papyrus were just where you'd left them, laying on the dog bed and wrapped around each other as though for protection. They had no doubt heard the two of you talking, but they didn't raise their heads until you came into the room with the near stranger beside you.
"Oh my gosh, you told me that they got along well, but this is so wonderful to see." Becky beamed at the two, who watched her with guarded expressions. "They always looked so lonely back at the rescue, and they didn't care for the other dogs- especially Rib. It's so nice that they found each other."
The words were like bittersweet daggers into your chest. It was so good that they found each other, but it should never have been like this. You would give anything to go back and make it not like this.
Sans was the first to move as Becky got down on her knees a good ways away from the bed. He separated from his brother, touching the tip of his snout to Papyrus's skull before hesitantly making his way to Becky. You kept your eyes on Papyrus for a moment, trying to gauge his emotional state, but it was harder to read their expressions like this.
"Hey, buddy, look at you," Becky mumbled happily. Like last time, she put her hand up, holding it limp and making herself as un-intimidating as she could. She waited patiently as Sans stepped forward close enough to sniff the offered appendage.
Like last time, he touched her fingers with his snout, his rib cage making that low, soothing rumble it did. It was very different from the sound of his growling, but you'd only heard it a few times before. It wasn't like Sans ever shifted when he didn't have to.
Unlike last time, however, Sans paused only a moment before gently nosing his head underneath her hand so that the palm rested against the tip of his nose.
The smile on Becky's face was so wide and genuine that you almost forgot how messed up this was. You didn't, of course, but you were very impressed with Sans and his display. You managed to put a smile on your own face, even if it didn't reach your eyes.
"Aw, it's good to see you too, bud," the Positive Paws employee said. She used her thumb to lightly rub the bone for a few seconds, and it surprised you that she was the first to pull away. But her smile hadn't faltered in the slightest, and she took a few moments to look over the monster in front of her.
As she marveled at how well the scars were healing, cooing degrading praises, you looked down at Papyrus in the bed. He was watching the exchange intently. He caught your gaze, and you gave him a thumbs up when Becky was turned away from you.
"I don't suppose you'll let me see your friend, huh?" she asked without it being a question. She peeked around Sans to get a good look at the newer addition to your home. "Hey, Rib, you're looking a lot better too," she said.
"They've both been doing well," you commented. At your voice, Sans took a step back from Becky and turned to walk to your side, where he sat. He looked up at you, and you leaned down enough to put a hand on his head for just a moment before removing it again. You swallowed before addressing Becky. "I don't know how good he'll be, but you could try getting a little closer if you need to. You might scare him, is all."
"Oh, I can see well enough back here," Becky said. "He's only been here for a month, and he was very touch averse when he was with us. Have you been able to touch him at all?"
You pretended to think in the time it took your chest to stop aching. "A couple of times," you answered. "I think having Tib as an example helps."
Papyrus shifted in the bed, whining a little. He was watching Becky, like he was expecting her to reach out and attack. Like he had to be alert to stay safe. Sans left your side to return to the bed, where he laid down beside his brother and gently bumped their skulls together.
"Well, I can easily see the progress he's made. That big crack on his face isn't quite so noticeable now, I think. But, I can definitely tell a lot of the smaller injuries have filled in, and his eyes are a little brighter." She paused for a bit to take in the two of them before she turned her face up to address you. "Do you think they might be brothers?"
You'd prepared yourself for questions of that nature, so even if it hurt, you had a response.
"I guess it's possible, but I'm not sure there'd be any way to tell for certain."
"No, I suppose there wouldn't be." Becky exhaled as she stood, using her knee as a brace. "...It really boils my blood to think about what happened to these guys. Not just Tib and Rib, but all of them." Becky put her hands in the pockets of her slacks as she looked away. "There's really not much to go on, and I've only seen a handful of monsters outside of these two, but… I think this is enough to know that whatever happened was really, really bad."
"Yeah, I don't know much of anything about it, but I agree." You looked at your roommates, socially imprisoned in a dog bed, as you said: "It's not fair, and it's not right. Everyone who had a part in this deserves a hell of a lot worse than what they probably got."
"Exactly," Becky agreed readily. She took a breath and let it out slowly as she visibly composed herself. "I don't like to get too ruffled with clients, but I hate that term anyways. We're all working together here, and sometimes I can't help but ditch the professional facade. I hope that's all right," Becky said with a sheepish smile.
"It's totally fine, I actually kind of like that." You had a lot of thoughts spinning around in your brain, thoughts of the other monsters and thoughts of the two on the floor of your house, but it wasn't the time to process them. "Is there anything else I can do for you while you're here?"
"Thank you, you're too sweet, but I think we're just about done. I wouldn't want to steal your whole afternoon away-it's pretty nice out, these two might like to go out and get some sun!" Becky turned to them and waved goodbye. "Now you two be good and keep getting better, okay? I'm sure I'll be back in a month or two and I expect this same amount of progress!"
It wasn't long until Becky was out the door again and you were waving at her van as she drove off. The visit had been even shorter than the last, and you had high hopes that Sans wouldn't be too affected by it, but…
A bright flash caught your attention just a few seconds after you'd closed the front door. When you reentered the living room you found Sans back to his usual self, but his brother still unshifted.
"Are you okay?" You worried as you quickly went to the couch and sat, opening the drawer of the end table nearby and handing Sans his clothes. "That sucked, I'm sorry, I'm glad it went pretty fast."
"yeah, that wasn't too bad," Sans said softly. You looked away (even if you weren't sure why, because Sans was just a skeleton, and your unique relationship had forced you to see him naked many times already) as he got dressed and then went right back to his brother.
Papyrus whined. He had begun shaking again, and as Sans reached his hand towards the larger's skull, Papyrus shied away from the touch.
"hey, it's okay… it's over, rus," Sans comforted. "you did great, yeah? didn't even have to get up. and you call me a lazybones."
The joke didn't land. Papyrus shook his head, shutting his sockets tight as a couple of tears fell from the corners. You and Sans shared a worried look before he put a hand on the side of his little brother's rib cage.
Papyrus growled. The noise startled you both enough to make you freeze, and enough for Sans to draw his hand away with clearly visible hurt on his face.
"papyrus?"
The blaster, as you'd heard them call this form before, laid his head on the ground and clawed at his face with another growl followed quickly by a pathetic whimper. He stopped long enough to give Sans- and then you- pleading eyes before he picked himself up enough to turn his back to the two of you.
You didn't know what was going on in his head, or why he was turning away comfort, but you did know a 'leave me alone' when you saw one. Sans looked like he was going to press further, but you were close enough to reach down and gently take one of his hovering hands.
He looked helpless, sad, and maybe even afraid, but after searching your face, he let out a shaking breath and nodded.
"okay, bro, we'll give you some space for now. you know where to find us…"
He didn't respond. Not beyond hunching his shoulders a little more.
"Take your time," you said gently. "I know this was a lot, and it's okay to need a while to process stuff. But don't feel bad or hesitate to come find your brother or me if you're lonely or need some company- on two legs or four."
His skull turned enough to let one of his glowing, tearful sockets search you. You gave him a sad smile, and he turned away again with a shiver down his spine and a flick of his tail.
You followed Sans into the kitchen, and without needing words to convey it, you knew it was time for a nap. The kind of nap you took together, the kind that reassured you that he was safe, and the kind that let Sans know he wasn't alone anymore. Your brain was fried, anyways; you needed some rest.
He slept in your room, held against your chest, his whole bony form wrapped up in a blanket so it didn't poke you and ruin emotional nap time. He put his skull close to your chest, and you could feel a little of the connection he'd spoken of before- the one your soul could make with his. It would have been strange if it hadn't been happening in small amounts the whole time, like you'd been micro-dosing on monster soul connection magic.
He was upset and insecure, and he was worried so, so deeply about his brother that you hardly knew how to respond to the emotion. Thankfully, you didn't have to. You squeezed him tight, ignoring the wetness on your shirt where his sockets touched it and the small, poorly concealed shakes of his rib cage when he inhaled. You let yourself feel, and you listened to him feel, and that was enough. You tried not to think about the “handful of other monsters” that Becky had brought up. That was a topic for later, and one that might not even go anywhere. Right now, Sans needed sleep.
When the nap had been taken and Papyrus had shifted back, you'd try to do the same for him as you were doing for Sans now. The three of you would talk about stuff after that.
Notes:
question of the day: if you're a pokemon fan, who is your favorite pokemon(s)? if you aren't, tell me what ingredients you would put in your ideal smoothie (pokemon fans can talk about smoothies, too)
Chapter 25
Notes:
i apologize for this one besties (i'm not actually sorry)
Chapter Text
You yawned as you got out of bed, checking your phone to see that it was 8:30. That was prime wake-up time, and you didn’t even set an alarm- point for you. Too bad you’d only slept a few hours.
You got dressed and went to the bathroom, groggy and knowing a midday nap was inevitable. Sans would join you, you reckoned, since he’d been sleeping poorly as well. It was hard not to stare up at the ceiling at night with a hurting heart and a desperate helplessness that made sleep impossible.
Teeth? Brushed. Face? Washed. Hair? Yes. You slipped into your slippers and went to the kitchen to finally get your coffee. You didn’t usually drink it like a source of stamina, but you’d started in the last two weeks.
You sat your phone on the counter and took a deep breath as you walked into view of the sight that had been greeting you every morning.
Papyrus had dragged the dog bed into the corner of the dining room, as far away as it could go. He didn’t raise his head to look as you waved weakly, but his gaze found yours.
“Good morning, Papyrus,” you said. You tried very hard to not let the sadness through, but it was hard. The last two weeks had been hard.
He didn’t say anything, because he couldn’t. He watched you for a few moments before he averted his sockets to the floor, drawing his foreleg into himself.
It’d taken a day to figure out that Papyrus wasn’t planning on shifting back. Sans had been worried he couldn’t, that he was stuck, but… that didn’t seem to be the case. When he’d asked the fifth time (after being ignored the first four) Papyrus had shaken his head before retreating. He didn’t like to be around the two of you, and he hated answering even your ‘yes’ and ‘no’ questions. You had no idea what was wrong, or why he was doing this, but maybe the vast, overwhelming amount of emotional and physical trauma he’d been through had something to do with it.
You went about your business in the kitchen, starting your coffee on its way and making casual conversation with yourself, if only because you thought Papyrus might like it.
“I don’t know about this hazelnut stuff I got, it’s alright but I don’t think I’d get it again,” you mused as you closed the bag of beans back up and put it away. “It’s kinda… too warm? If that makes sense?” You sighed. “It probably doesn’t.”
There was no response- you would've jumped out of your skin if there had been.
You made your own breakfast with looming anxiety in your stomach. You would be patient and give Papyrus as much time as he needed to feel comfortable shifting back, but you wouldn’t let him starve. He hadn’t eaten in two days- so along with your egg on a bagel sandwich, you made Papyrus a plate of scrambled eggs with a few pieces of bacon chopped up and thrown in. You sat your own food aside, knowing you wouldn’t be able to eat it until the nausea of the situation had faded.
Papyrus finally raised his head as you walked over, stopping a few feet away and taking a seat on the floor with his plate in tow. He looked at the food and then away again, his sockets sullen and dull.
“Hey,” you said gently. “I know you’re not feeling well, and things are… weird. And I’m not going to try and make you do anything huge, but…” you trailed off, setting the plate beside the bed he laid in. “But… I made you some breakfast.”
He leaned his head forward enough to sniff the food, leaning away again and lowering his head back to the plush edge of the cushion. He huffed out a breath through his long, scarred snout.
You had to fight the tears, but you’d been fighting them so much lately that you were getting really good at it.
“Papyrus… it’s been two days since you’ve eaten anything, and I know you guys don’t need to eat quite as much as I do, but I…” you paused to take a deep breath. He was looking at you, face scrunched a little in pain, and god what you wouldn’t give to make him feel better…
“Can you please try to eat some?” you asked, voice wobbling. You cleared your throat. “I mean, I’m nowhere near the master chef that you are, but- but I think you’ll like it… just a bite? Please?”
He whimpered at your words, drawing his legs into himself and closing his sockets. You waited, hoping he’d give you some kind of an answer… you weren't going to press him further, but you had to try.
He relaxed enough to hesitantly push himself closer to the plate, not leaving the safety of the dog bed but far enough out that he could sniff the eggs and bacon in earnest. Papyrus looked up at you, and you looked at the big crack on his face that was placed a little differently now than it had been before. He whined, and you gave him the best smile you could and a stupid thumbs up.
He nosed the fork you’d brought off of the plate and took a small mouthful of eggs. You almost cried in relief, but your beefed-up tear tolerance held you back as you watched him chew and swallow.
“See? I tried to make the bacon like you usually eat it, but I might not have, uh… paid the closest attention and it maybe got a little burned…” You rubbed the back of your neck. “Sorry about that.”
He acknowledged you with a glance before eating more. He was shaking a little, but you’d gotten some food into him- that was enough for now.
“I’m gonna go eat mine- don’t worry about eating all of it, thank you for trying,” you praised. He flicked his tail at that- and you didn’t know their body language well enough to know what that meant, so you continued. “You can leave the plate there when you’re done. Only thing that might come and try to eat it is your brother, but it’s too early for that.”
He and Sans didn’t quite smile when they were on all fours, but Papyrus’s rumble of half-hearted amusement was about the same. You smiled at him, picking up the fork and pretending like its dismissal didn’t twist you up inside, and you went to eat your own breakfast and get on with the day.
Chapter 26
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
"Hey, Papyrus- your brother and I are gonna watch a movie about dinosaurs, you wanna join?"
Even if the skeleton had declined the offer every time you'd made it, this was day 16 of his self-imposed isolation, maybe he'd finally cave? You'd asked him every time the two of you watched something.
You leaned against the table with your hands tucked into your pockets. It was a cozy evening and you'd put on some fuzzy PJ pants and a tanktop in celebration. Sans proposed a documentary series about dinosaurs, and as soon as he ticked his little skeletal fingertips on your phone to show you a single clip, you were convinced. Dinosaurs hardly needed more introduction than "big, cool, scaly, roar sometimes."
Papyrus was out of his bed and sitting upright. Even as he was, it didn't seem like he was able to stay still for long periods of time, and he often got up and aimlessly wandered the house. It was... sad.
He didn't immediately shake his head or retreat to his bed, so you pressed just a little. "A lot of them have feathers in this one- that's a pretty popular idea in the 'dinosaur nerd' sphere, I guess," you blabbered. "It makes a lot of sense, since birds evolved from dinosaurs, and it looks kinda cool on a T Rex." You stopped to give him a smile, noticing his paws twitch. "I think you'd like it, and... well, I'd like it. If you came and hung out for a little while, I mean."
You dared to hope that he'd agree, looking into his big, uncertain sockets-
He stood and looked to you before pointing his snooter to the living room, his elongated skull flushed a little blue but clearly telling you to lead the way.
You grinned- a big, honest grin- and did as you were subtly told, waiting for him to come and walk beside you. It was very strange to be taller than him, but even on all fours he came up past your hips. You wanted to praise him, and tell him you were so proud and that you'd missed him- but if the goal was to make him feel normal, that'd be the opposite of the right thing to do.
"Trust me, it'll be cool. Sans was the one who suggested it so you KNOW it's gotta have substance. He's usually too lazy to pick things out, as I'm sure you know."
Papyrus looked politely up at you as you spoke.
"it won't be cool if you set the expectations too high," Sans called. You smiled and made your way to Sans- wrapped up in a blanket in the middle of the couch, eyelights bright in the dim room that was prepped for TV watching. A bowl of popcorn sat to his side, and you grabbed it and sat in its place as you stuffed a handful into your mouth.
He'd been having a tough time, which went without saying, but he was trying his damn best to stay positive for his brother's sake. Having each other helped.
"No expectations are too high for dinosaurs," you said. He rolled his eyes and looked at Papyrus- standing a couple feet from the couch- with a soft expression.
"c'mon up, bro, there's room," he coaxed, unwrapping an arm from the blanket cocoon to pat the seat on his other side. "always love a pap in my lap."
Weird rhyme aside, you didn't think he'd actually do it... and he seemed like he thought about denying the request, taking little steps in place, but... he searched Sans's face, and then yours, and with only a moment's pause he trotted over and jumped onto the couch with ease, curling up and resting his front end on Sans's lap.
Sans seemed just as surprised as you were. Papyrus's sockets were shut tight, kinda like he was... you didn't want to think it, but between his eyes and the way he shook a little, he seemed scared.
"see? perfect fit," Sans murmured gently. Even if he kept his voice even, his own hand shook as he raised it up and then laid it on Papyrus's shoulder. The blaster stiffened a little at the touch, but he relaxed quickly as soothing little circles were rubbed into his bones.
The dinosaurs were just as cool as anticipated, and Papyrus relaxed more and more as it went on. You looked over a few times and saw him snuggling in closer to his brother, his skull turned away from the TV and pressed against Sans.
Even if he left not long after you were done, sockets sad, it was something.
Sans stared after him as his tail vanished into the dining room. You let out a big breath and leaned over to grab the skeleton in a hug, the popcorn bowl left on the coffee table after being demolished. Papyrus had even eaten some, after Sans tried to “look, an airplane” his 20 year old brother. It might have been a snack of pure spite, but you were so glad he was eating again. Even the small amount he was eating.
“Hey, uh, wanna come watch me play a game on my computer?” you asked his shoulder, rubbing his back.
“yeah, sounds fun,” he replied. His voice shook. You knew you weren’t going to play a game, and he knew it, too. Neither of you wanted to be alone, but you didn’t want Papyrus to feel left out or replaced in the meantime.
You went, giving Papyrus a goodnight wave as you did. A flick of his gaze was the only acknowledgement you got.
Your bedroom door closed, and Sans slid down against it like the emotions in his gut were weighing him to the floor. He brought his knees up to his chest and- how could it possibly hurt more to see him break down now than it had a few months ago? You swallowed and went back to him, mission of getting to the bed forgotten, and knelt down.
“this fuckin’ sucks,” he mumbled, punctuated with a small sob. He pressed the heels of his hands into his closed sockets. “he won’t let us help him.”
“We are helping him, I think…” you trailed off. How could you say that for sure? You put a hand on Sans’s knee. “He was better tonight, I didn’t think he’d join us and I definitely didn’t think he’d get on the couch with you. That’s progress, right?”
“doesn’t feel like it. just feels like my soul got torn out and stomped on.” Sans smiled, taking his hands away and letting you see the tears. “i could feel his, just a bit. he’s definitely putting up walls, but it’s hard to hide how you feel when you’re as bright as my brother is.”
You waited for Sans to continue, your hand still on him, frowning.
“he’s so confused, and lost… he doesn’t know what to do, and he’s scared.”
You closed your eyes for a moment, but it didn’t stop your own tears. You braced yourself and leaned forward before scooping Sans into your arms and standing up.
He didn’t fight it, just wrapped his arms around your neck as you made your way to the bed and flopped him down. He was getting heavier, but you were still strong enough to lift him.
“thanks, but i can walk,” he said, turning onto his side as you crawled over him and laid down closest to the wall.
“The bed’s better for being sad than the floor,” you said gently.
“i mean, you’re not wrong,” he conceded. You listened to the sound of him breathing, evening out as he relaxed, and then you grabbed his blanket and threw it over him. You were a blanket hog, so he’d brought his own down. He slept with you almost every night, and when he was up in his own room, he slept on Papyrus’s bed. Another painful moment for the books.
“Today was a step in the right direction,” you said for yourself just as much as for Sans. “He’s eating now, and spending more time with us… he’s getting there.”
“yeah... yeah, he is, sorry for being so doom and gloom,” Sans mumbled as he flipped over to face you and get the blanket situated correctly.
“You’re not ‘being’ or ‘doing’ anything unreasonable,” you reassured him, reaching over and patting his skull. The urge to gently slap your hand against the smooth surface often overcame you, but now you had permission. “We don’t know what’s going on or how to fix it, of course it’s gonna get overwhelming.”
Sans hummed, drawing the blanket around him tighter and closing his eyes. You reached down and pulled your own over you from its rumpled position at the foot of the bed.
“Goodnight, dude,” you whispered.
“g’night,” he replied. He opened his sockets for a moment and looked at you with soft, tired eyes before averting them. “thanks for being here, and… keepin’ me sane... love ya.”
Your heart, too overfull of emotion, beat painfully. He’d never said that to you before, and you guessed you’d never said it to him, either. Still, you didn’t have to consider your reply.
“Love you, too.”
Notes:
the autistic allure of dinosaurs is indomitable
Chapter 27
Notes:
this ones a few days after the last- long awaited and momentous occasions
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You blinked awake, groggy and unsure of what had disturbed your sleep. Sans wasn’t in your room tonight, so it wasn’t him making a funny sound or snoring. It took you reaching over to flick on your bedside lamp to spot Papyrus in the dim doorway.
He had tears running down his skull, and he whined again. That was probably what had woken you. You propped yourself up on your elbow, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.
“Hey, Papyrus, you okay?” you asked.
He shook his head and continued the pathetic noises. He took a step into the room, and then another, but then one back. He shivered, paws dancing uneasily on the carpet.
You were awake enough by then to put together that he really wasn’t okay. His breathing was shallow and shaky and he had his tail tucked up under him. You swallowed the lump in your throat and slowly got out of bed, sitting down on the floor right beside.
The words were on your tongue, but you didn’t have to say them. Papyrus hurried over and laid down in front of you, pawing at his snout and whimpering.
“It’s okay, Papyrus, you’re okay,” you tried to comfort. His sockets were shut as he sobbed. “I’m here.”
You honestly had no clue what to say beyond that. He could be having any number of responses to his trauma, and while you could think of words that might help with one, would they hinder another? You put your hands in your lap as he opened his eyes and looked up at you.
“Hey… I know that this is scary, and whatever you’re going through is a lot…” You took a deep breath as he watched you. “But- but if being like this makes it better somehow, then this is fine. I just… I’m worried that it… isn’t. Making things better- that maybe it could also make things worse…”
His tears fell as he whined.
“But I trust you,” you said, awkward but pressing on. “I trust that you know what you’re doing, or that… that at least you know we’re here for you. For anything.”
You were surprised at Papyrus getting to his feet. He staggered, and you were half afraid he’d leave again, but he did the opposite. He took a step closer to you, his skull lowered, sockets averted.
You had no idea what that meant. You held up your hands, and the confusion must have shown on your face, because he huffed. He nodded his head towards your right hand.
What? Your mind put the pieces together.
“You… want me to… touch your skull?”
Papyrus whimpered in response but moved his head closer.
You wanted to question him, make sure that he was sure, but… you’d just said you trusted him, and he clearly wanted you to do this. You took a deep breath.
With slow, plainly telegraphed movements, you moved closer. Papyrus shied away for only a second before steeling himself and moving back, his paw only an inch from your leg as he bent over you to let you do this.
You cupped the side of his face in your palm. He was warm, and the bone was smooth where it wasn’t scarred. You used your thumb to gently wipe away some of his tears, hoping the motion was comforting.
“I’m here. I’m not gonna let anybody hurt you again, Papyrus. It’s okay to be yourself, or… or whatever you wanna be.”
A terrible noise made its way out of him. He moved forward so fast you jerked back, not sure what he was doing and fearful of making him uncomfortable.
He practically crawled into your lap, his foreleg curled up against your chest as he cried. You were honestly too frozen to move, arms up, looking down at Papyrus like he was a grenade that could go off with the slightest touch.
He opened his sockets to give you a desperate look, cooing a noise that broke your heart. You swallowed your own tears down and brought your arms in around him, holding him in a hug you’d been dreaming about for weeks. Not like this, though.
“I’ve got you. I’m here.” You gave him a gentle squeeze, placing a hand on the back of his ridged skull as your night shirt grew wet with his tears. “I’m right here.”
Papyrus surprised you again as he lit up with magic and finally, finally shifted back. Right in your lap, in the middle of the night, during some kind of breakdown.
“I’M S-SORRY,” he choked, wrapping his arm around you and holding you in a vice grip. “I’M- I DON’T-”
“Shh, it’s okay, just breathe,” you murmured. His skull was under your chin, his big body still shoved as far onto your lap as it could be, like he was hiding himself from the world. He was breathing way too fast, and you didn’t want him to get more worked up trying to tell you something that could wait. “You’re okay. You’re okay.”
It was strange to have a fully naked skeleton crying in your lap, and stranger still for that skeleton to be taller than you were- usually he was about the size of a fifth grader. Papyrus was trembling so hard his bones rattled.
You held him close- not just for him, but for you, too. You held him like you’d wanted to hold him for a long time, trying to put as much of your want to help into your soul as you could. You rubbed the back of his skull, making little sounds or saying things you thought he’d like to hear.
He didn’t part from you. His ribcage was so close to your own that you could feel a hint of his pain, and his loneliness, and his fear. It was new, and it was intense, but you tried to replace it with warmth and comfort as much as you could. Judging by the way he clung to you and kept close to your soul, you thought maybe it was helping. He was breathing easier, at least.
“I’ve got you,” you said again, rubbing a hand on the back of his ribs. “Did… did something happen?”
He didn’t reply immediately, but he took a deep breath like he was preparing to. He was relaxed enough to melt into the touch, and you took the time to reach up and drag your blanket down off the bed and awkwardly throw it around him.
“TH. THANK YOU,” he said, voice trembling. “CAN- IF-” His sentence faltered, and he hid his skull in your shirt. “CAN I STAY?”
“Of course,” you breathed, setting your chin on the top of his skull. “I want you to stay.” You had thoughts of funny, silly, tone-lightening things to say, but… he didn’t seem like he needed to be distracted. He needed to be here and feel what he was feeling. “Do you want to stay on the floor or move up to the bed?”
He didn’t reply or move, just made a choked noise that sounded like an attempt.
“We’ll stay here, at least for now?”
He nodded against you.
“I HAD A-A. A NIGHTMARE,” he managed. “AND- IT WAS-” He sobbed. “I GOT… SCARED.”
It sounded like he didn’t want to admit it. You stared forward at nothing in particular, holding him and feeling the way his body stilled its violent shaking as he stayed with you.
“I’m sorry,” you said softly. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
“YOU. YOU SENT ME- BACK.” Papyrus’s fingers dug into you with enough force to hurt. “I W-WAS A DOG, AND. AND THOSE- DOGS- THEY. THEY DON’T DE-DESERVE-”
He was getting worked up again, so you shushed him gently. “I’m listening, I’m here, please breathe,” you said a little desperately.
“SANS DIDN’T- HE DIDN’T STOP YOU,” Papyrus cried. “AND I T-TRIED TO CHANGE BACK! I TRIED, I R-REALLY DID, BUT- BUT I COULDN’T, AND- WHEN- WHEN I WOKE UP-”
His voice broke and he didn’t continue. He must have realized how hard he was grabbing you, because he took his arm from around your neck and finally looked up.
“SORRY, I-I’M SORRY-” he whined, tears falling heavy down his cheekbones, but you hugged him tighter.
“No, it’s okay, don’t go,” you nearly whined yourself. It was impossible to keep yourself composed in the wake of this. “You’re okay.”
He didn’t protest. He grabbed the blanket and tugged it around himself, finally finding a position in your lap that wasn’t uncomfortable- he sat mostly on your thigh, long legs drawn up and resting on the floor so his chest could be against yours. His head found a spot on your shoulder and he grabbed you again, much gentler this time.
“You’re not a dog,” you said. His body tensed, but you kept going. “You’ve never been a dog, and I-” you stopped at the sound of your voice wobbling. You composed yourself. “I would never, ever send you away. Even if you were a blaster forever- and I know Sans wouldn’t let me do it, not for any reason.”
Papyrus didn’t say anything. He sniffled and sobbed, but he didn’t have a response. You didn’t mind- your hand found a new home on the back of his skull and you held it, the other wrapped around the blanket over his waist to keep him from sliding off or losing his balance.
“You’re safe,” you told him. “Sans and I wouldn’t let them hurt you again, and whatever they tried to make you believe was all just- just wrong. Stupid, and evil, and wrong .”
“IT HURTS…” Papyrus whispered.
“I know. I’m sorry.” You nuzzled your head against his skull, the only further gesture of affection you could think to make. “Just… just try to remember you don’t have to hurt alone.”
The words made his breath hitch. They were awkward, and felt cumbersome to say, but they were absolutely true. You didn’t doubt that for a second.
He didn’t say anything else- it seemed like his courage had faded for the moment. After a while, you helped him up onto the bed and laid down with him, and he once again moved himself right up against your soul, letting out a shaking breath.
Everything was too depressing for you to feel any positive emotion at him touching you like this, or finally getting to snuggle with Papyrus. You would have preferred this happen a long time from now, slowly and carefully, on his own terms as he healed at his own pace. But things didn’t happen like that, they happened in a terrible way that left your insides feeling raw and torn up with grief.
You couldn’t change what had happened, so you put all of your effort into helping him now. You’d do whatever it took to help him now. You didn’t understand why he’d come to you and not to Sans, or why he was suddenly so eager to be touched, but those were questions for another time.
You engulfed him with your body and the blanket and tried so hard to take away some of the pain. To let him know he was safe, and okay, and loved. He’d come into your life in such a harrowing, messy way, but that didn’t matter. He was your friend and you loved him, and you’d help him through however many midnight breakdowns he needed to have to feel better.
Notes:
as they say, all emotions that happen past 9 pm should never be trusted. papyrus didn't get the memo and his brains all sick and twisted from the torture or whatever, so hes. going through it. hit a bit of a breaking point, you could say. really Unwell, i'd venture
Chapter 28
Notes:
a stranger to the "POV fight" enters the battlefield...
Chapter Text
When he woke up, you were still asleep. Papyrus felt your arms around him, one laid on the bed and under his neck and shoulders and the other over his side and draping onto his back. He might have been scared if he wasn’t pressed close to you, as close as he could be, drowning in what your soul had to say.
He’d been too afraid to do this before. He knew that, if he’d felt what he was feeling now, he’d have been far more comfortable being vulnerable in your presence. But he didn’t know that you’d feel this way- Sans had told him you did, and you’d told him you did, but he had no way of knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt.
What would he do if you didn’t want him enough? If you said all the nice, kind things you said but your soul said another? That you were okay with him being in your house but you didn’t want him there- that you wouldn’t fight for him if it came down to it- that you thought his blaster form was bad and that made him bad.
Papyrus didn’t know how he’d be able to cope if your soul didn’t say the same exact thing that you said, just as loudly, so he didn’t let himself get close.
After all, human souls were far stronger than monster souls. His soul had been used as a sponge for human hate and anger and disgust for a long time, and those feelings towards himself were hard to overcome.
They didn’t seem hard for you to overcome. You did it with ease, and Papyrus needed it. He felt weak and pathetic for it, but he needed it so, so badly that it hurt.
He didn’t hurt now, though. He relaxed, happy to be curled up tight in a ball- he didn’t have muscles to be concerned about, and his magic took a lot more than one night of bad sleep posture to get wonky. And, the way he was, he could keep his skull close to your head and his own soul close to yours.
You loved him just as much as he needed and then some. It was intense, and new, and unfamiliar- and he cursed himself for being too afraid of rejection to do this sooner.
He felt bad for what he’d done. He knew that not changing back had made you and Sans very sad, but it was the only option that didn’t make him feel like he was falling apart bone by bone. He didn’t have to talk and he hardly had to think when he was a blaster. It was easy to ignore the horrible things and let himself mope and drift and not do much of anything.
Seeing Sans as a blaster again had hurt him more than shifting himself. He felt terrible that he didn’t want to see his brother like that- it made him feel sick and hollow inside. Not with Sans- stars, never with Sans- but with… everything else.
Papyrus knew that Sans was going to be upset about this. It was one of the reasons he didn’t do it until he felt like he had to. For so long, they’d relied on one another in so many ways and for almost everything, and Papyrus loved his brother more than anything else in the world, but he couldn’t provide what you could.
And despite the way he ached with the thought, sometimes Sans made it worse.
It wasn’t fair. Papyrus hated how unfair it was and he wanted to ignore it- and he’d tried- but he just couldn’t. Sans reminded him too much of himself and all the months he’d spent There, and… and he reminded Papyrus what could have happened if he’d just put aside his stupid, worthless pride and given in. Sans knew it- he probably thought Papyrus was the brave one, but that wasn’t true; he was the dumb one.
Even now, Papyrus couldn’t find a scenario where he’d actually fight. The thought of it made him want to throw up. But Sans had , and what had it gotten him? Far less pain, and fewer marks in his bones, and time spent chained in a cage instead of… the other things Papyrus could hardly think about. Things that made handcuffs seem like a mercy and a couple of LVs look excusable. Dogs- not dog monsters, but dogs - provided little EXP. They had neither the magic nor the soul substance that made up humans and monsters, so despite what he’d been through, Sans had only gained two levels of violence. It wasn’t something people went around talking about, but Papyrus knew that some monsters in his life had more than that- monsters he still trusted and loved. Monsters who had made the wrong choice, sure, but were now making the right ones.
Papyrus still believed that ending a life was never the answer. There had to be other ways- there were always other ways. But now he knew how horrible the other ways could be- he knew what refusing to kill meant sacrificing, in the worst case scenario.
Staring at the wreckage left in the wake of his actions, it was incredibly hard to still think he made the right choice. Now that he had time and distance to put between himself and all of the agony, it was both easy to see the scale of his choices and hard to swallow the new breed of pain they caused. He could have fought back- he had fought back, but he'd stopped before... before he'd killed anybody. He had clung to his beliefs so firmly that everything else had fallen away-
And Sans was collateral damage. When he saw his brother’s scars and watched him flinch and heard him sob in the bathroom at night, how was Papyrus supposed to believe he’d done the right thing without his mind, body, and soul screaming in protest?
He couldn’t. So he came to you.
Chapter 29
Notes:
confession: i've had this chapter written for like two months but wasn't super happy with it and so i never posted it, thought i'd end up rewriting it. then i sat down way later and was like okay lets read it and maybe write a new one but upon review i was like well. i'm actually fine with this and i forget what was wrong in the first place
anyways yeah uhmmm so when two people are both deeply traumatized and coping in different ways, sometimes those ways collide a little bit and uhm- yeah you can just read the rest
Chapter Text
It was morning. The sun was rising, but you were still sleeping- Papyrus stayed as long as he could, but staying still had always been a struggle. He gently got up, grabbing the blanket on the floor and wrapping it around himself, the process tedious because of his limitations.
He gave you a fond look before he turned to leave.
His breath hitched.
Sans was standing in the doorway. His sockets were dark, their gaze meeting for a tense, confused moment, but before Papyrus could do more than freeze, his brother left.
He cursed under his breath, looking back to make sure you were still sleeping before he ran after his brother. His soul was pounding, fear and panic making his magic falter. He caught Sans halfway up the stairs.
“SANS, WAIT!”
He stopped. A shaking hand was holding the railing. Sans didn’t look back.
“I- I’M SORRY, I KNOW I’M- I SHOULD HAVE COME TO YOU-”
“it’s fine, pap, really. i’m just glad you’re here.”
Sans’s voice was at odds with his words.
“N-NO YOU’RE NOT, AND I’M SORRY!”
“it’s not your fault,” he argued, voice forcefully brighter as he finally turned to Papyrus. He looked very tired and small in just a tank top and shorts, the light back in his eyes- but just barely. “i don’t blame you for not wantin’ to be around me sometimes.”
“THAT’S NOT TRUE!” Papyrus cried, voice breaking. “I WANT TO BE- AND- AND USUALLY I AM!”
“yeah,” Sans agreed. His shoulders slumped. “you’re right, that wasn’t fair to say… sorry, i’m still a little tired.” he gave Papyrus a very forced smile. “i’m proud of ya. i’m gonna go sleep some more so i can get my skull on straight... talk later?”
Papyrus watched him turn to leave again. His chest tightened so hard he thought it’d crush his soul, but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t- he whined as his own tears fell, each step taking his brother further away. He was upset- he was upset, and he had every right to be- but he was walking away, and-
“ PLEASE ! PLEASE- I’M SORRY- DON’T-” Papyrus choked on a sob, the waves of pain and grief returning from last night. “PLEASE DON’T GO, PLEASE- DON’T- DON’T LEAVE AGAIN-”
Sans spun around, but Papyrus had already sank down to his knees, his only hand clutching the blanket. It hurt- it all hurt so much. He’d made you and Sans sad by staying a blaster, and he’d made you sad last night, and now- now he’d hurt Sans by avoiding him. His breaths came out shallow and uneven. He shut his eyes tight as the ringing in his head made it hard to concentrate on anything but the pain.
“I’M SORRY, I’M S- SORRY , I NEED YOU- I’LL D-DO ANYTHING-”
A hand was put on his shoulder, and then another over his own. Papyrus jerked his skull up and found Sans. His sockets were wide and brimming with tears.
“shit… i’m here, pap, i’m right here. i… i’m not leaving ever again.”
“B-BUT I HURT YOU- AND… I’M… I’M BAD.” Papyrus’s body went rigid as he said the words. Hearing them again- when he wasn’t forced to say them- when he should have been better because now he was free and okay- but he wasn’t okay and all the things he wanted to forget were still there- and they’d always be there- he’d always be there-
“papyrus, hey, you gotta breathe,” Sans said, pulling the hand from near Papyrus’s neck away and helping him sit down on the floor. The movements drew a wheeze from the taller skeleton, and he was distracted from his spiraling thoughts by the contact. “you’re here, you’re fine- i’m not mad. i was being a babybones ‘n throwin’ a tantrum but- but i would never leave ya,” Sans’s voice was soft but desperate. He blinked away tears and kept his shaking hands on his brother’s shoulders. “it doesn’t matter- s-some stuff i just don’t need to know, right? It ain’t just us anymore and they can help you better than me- ‘n maybe that hurts, but it’s okay . you’re the best person i know, and you're okay.”
“I’M SORRY. I’M S- SO SORRY,” Papyrus wept, grabbing Sans and pulling him as close as he could. The words were hard to understand and all he cared about- all his panic-driven mind could think- was not losing Sans again. “PLEASE…”
“i’m here, pap,” Sans said as he clung to Papyrus, rubbing the back of his head and trying so hard to make things better. “i’m here, 'n i'm sorry i said that stuff- it’s okay. everything’s okay, you didn’t do nothin’ wrong. you’re not alone anymore- and you- you’d have to do a lot more t-to get me to leave.”
Terrible sobs ripped through Papyrus’s chest, and Sans was hardly better off. It hurt. Everything hurt so much, but Sans was here. Papyrus could feel his magic, and the familiar way his hands felt on the back of his head, and it reminded him that he was here. He wouldn’t leave- and Papyrus wouldn’t leave him.
He remembered a time when just seeing Sans again was more hope than he’d let himself hold. But that was over, and Sans was here, and Sans had never ever been there- and they were both okay.
Not right now, but they would be.
Sans was an asshole. As Papyrus’s tears slowly began to die down, he just kept thinking about how bad he’d messed up.
It was fine for him to go to you instead- it was fine for Papyrus to rely on you. It was fine, Sans wanted it, and yet it left him feeling empty when it happened. It wasn’t like it was some fucked up competition, he really was happy that Papyrus was back to being himself and not a blaster, but he was also wounded that he’d went to the person he couldn’t even be touched by and not his brother.
That wasn’t Papyrus’s fault; he hadn’t done anything wrong. They were both trying to get past some really heavy, horrible shit, and Papyrus shouldn’t feel like he had to tiptoe around Sans’s ego in the process.
The weeks that Papyrus had been ‘away’ had left him scared and anxious, though, and he just couldn’t pretend he was fine. He thought leaving was the best option, the one that would give him time to think and reason away his emotions and figure out what to say. Look where that had gotten him- trying to hold the pieces of his brother together while he had a breakdown on the floor.
The way Papyrus’s voice had broken as he'd pleaded, begged him not leave… Sans wouldn’t forget it any time soon. He rocked his brother and tried to fix his mistake as best he could.
Papyrus sniffled and pulled away from Sans, their gazes meeting.
“I R-REALLY AM SORRY…” Papyrus mumbled as he attempted to scrub what remained of his tears away.
“you don’t have to keep sayin’ it, bro…” Sans said as he brought their foreheads together. “things just… got a lil messy. which- eh, it happens.” Sans let out a breath. “you’ve put up with my messes for years.”
“YOU’RE NOT MAD?” Papyrus asked as they broke the contact, hand fidgeting with his blanket.
“nope,” Sans confirmed, and it was true. Maybe later he’d feel a pang of it, but right now all he cared about was making sure Papyrus knew how much he was loved. “i was a jerk to act like that, i really am just happy i can talk with you again… you feelin’ a little better?”
Papyrus nodded. He looked exhausted and still very much naked- Sans was about to suggest fixing that when he was interrupted.
You’d woken up at the yelling, thinking something was wrong- which it was, but it wasn’t wrong in a way you could help fix. So you’d stayed in your room until the crying had stopped.
You felt bad for Sans. Being left out never felt good, and you couldn’t imagine what kind of trauma was amplifying those feelings. You felt bad for Papyrus, because something was making him more comfortable coming to you than to his brother, and there was no way it was your soothing aura alone- mostly because you didn’t have one. You had a loud soul at best.
When things were quiet, you left your room and found the two of them sitting right in front of the stairs. They were quietly talking, and you didn’t want to interrupt, but you were also anxious and needed to see that they were both okay.
Sans caught sight of you first. Papyrus noticed the shift and looked around to spot you as well. You felt awkward just standing there, so you put your hands in the pockets of your pajamas and looked away.
“Sorry, just passing through, wanted to make sure neither of you fell down the stairs…” you lied. Sans’s smile grew just a touch more genuine and Papyrus’s sockets softened. “Uhm… I’ll run upstairs and get you some clothes?” you more or less asked, looking at the taller of the two who was distinctly lacking such things.
He nodded, and you nodded back and scooted past the sad skeleton heap. “You need anything?” you asked Sans, nudging him with your foot.
“nah, i’m good. thanks,” he answered.
You made your journey and then came back again, a sweater and leggings for Papyrus in your arms. A flight of stairs later- the bottom of which was empty- you found them relocated to the couch.
Papyrus was lying with his skull in Sans’s lap, supported by a pillow, while the older of the two stroked his skull and held his shoulder. The sight was sad yet warm.
You left the clothes on the coffee table and exchanged a look with Sans. He’d definitely been crying- you already knew that, it was loud enough to hear from your bedroom- but he seemed okay. You couldn’t quite smile, so you cleared your throat.
“I’m gonna go back to my room, you two shout if you need anything,” you said gently. Sans nodded and Papyrus opened his sockets to acknowledge you before you left again.
You’d give them space. It seemed like they needed to talk about some things.
Chapter 30
Notes:
okay lets relax and take a stroll thru Not Angst City for a little bit
Chapter Text
You sat peacefully on the couch, watching a movie with Sans asleep against your side. It was pretty typical behavior for the chronically sleepy skeleton, especially in the handful of 'recovery days' the two had taken since the little stair-shouting incident. The brothers had spent a lot of time in their room, probably talking about… everything. You didn’t pry, knowing that this wasn’t your place. You were just glad that Papyrus was back and more or less okay, which in turn made Sans happier.
Though he tried to hide it, you could see Papyrus watching from a whole four inches away when he thought you had your eyes averted. He played with the hem of his shorts and did a bad job paying attention to the film.
Since his night huddled against your chest, he had yet to touch you again. You were waiting for him to bring it up, but you kept catching him looking at you with soft, sad, almost yearning eyes. You'd hoped he'd be bold enough to ask, and you didn't want to push him, but you were beginning to think he might be waiting for you to make the first move. The more you thought about it, of course he would- you’d do the same thing in his position.
"Hey, Pap?" you spoke, looking over at him fully. He stiffened and looked dead ahead, his skull flushed a little.
"Y-YES? IS SOMETHING WRONG?" he asked. It was a little funny how transparent he was sometimes, and you couldn't help but smile.
"If you want to... y'know, get in on this..." you said awkwardly, gesturing to his brother with the arm not draped over his blanket-wrapped shoulder, "you can."
Papyrus stuttered over a word before shutting his jaw, looking away.
"I, UHM! I APPRECIATE THE OFFER, I JUST... JUST..." Papyrus trailed off, looking flustered. Even if he'd mostly recovered from his blaster weeks and subsequent breakdowns, he was still far more unsure of himself than before.
"You don't have to touch me, I didn't mean to come off that way, but-"
"NO NO, I DO! I THINK, BUT IT- YOU-" he huffed and grabbed his shorts for a second before finally looking over at you, embarrassed and on the verge of tears. "W. WOULD IT BE OKAY IF- MAYBE WE JUST... HELD HANDS?"
His question had increased in pitch so much that the last two words came out little more than squeaks. You felt bad for causing his anxiety so you nodded and held out your free hand to him.
"I think that's a good idea," you said, and you meant it and felt a little dumb for not considering it yourself..
Though still nervous, Papyrus scooted over. It was dim in the room, most of the light coming from the TV, but it was enough to see his scarred face watching in anticipation. He held up his hand, looking at you for permission. You nodded, noticing that he was shaking, and from there it was just one moment's hesitation before his long, smooth fingers slipped between yours.
You didn't want to make him feel even more unsure than he already did, so you let him see your very real, genuine smile before turning your attention back to the screen.
As the minutes wore on, his shaking died down. Your hands were resting between the two of you, and as the movie was close to finishing you decided to push just the tiniest, littlest bit.
You used your thumb to stroke the side of his bony hand. It tightened its grip on you-
And he leaned stiffly into your side, a breathy noise coming out of him like he was holding back a whine.
"You okay?" you whispered, not wanting to wake the second skeleton who was snoring at your opposite side.
"YES. YES, SORRY, IT'S JUST. A LOT."
"That's okay, just wanted to make sure. I haven't held hands very much before, sorry if I'm sweaty."
"YOU ARE, A-A LITTLE BIT," Papyrus stuttered, but when you looked over he was smiling ever so slightly, relaxing as his head found a spot against yours. "BUT I DON'T MIND. SANS EMITS SLIME FAR GREATER THAN THIS."
"mm, 'm up," Sans grumbled upon hearing his name. He groggily relaxed and was snoring again in seconds, making you giggle, followed by an amused but equally annoyed huff from Papyrus.
The credits were rolling soon enough, but you didn’t let go of Papyrus, and he didn’t let go of you. You kept rubbing your thumb along his bones, enjoying the way it felt and the tenderness of the touch. Their bones felt sort of like porcelain, just a lot sturdier; smooth, with just a little bit of texture. It was still so foreign from anybody or anything that you’d touched before, and even if both of them felt the same… this was Papyrus, who you’d barely touched at all. Sans might have jumped straight to spooning you and shoving himself into your embrace every chance he got, but this was good, too. It made you feel seen and happy, and you hoped it made Papyrus feel the same.
“... THEY TOLD ME NO HUMAN WOULD EVER WANT TO TOUCH ME LIKE THIS,” Papyrus shared, voice raw and reluctant. The words made you wince and hold his hand tighter. “I-I KNEW IT WASN’T TRUE, BECAUSE- THE HUMAN THAT FREED US, FRISK, THEY DID ALL THE TIME. BUT… AT SOME POINT, I… THINK I STOPPED KNOWING. AND I STARTED TO BELIEVE THEM.”
You took a deep breath, feeling your chest expand and letting it ground you. When you stopped the tears threatening to form and turned, Papyrus was staring off at the wall. He was still against you, and you brought your joined hands up to rest on your thigh so you could hold his better.
“I like how your bones feel,” you replied gently, carefully removing your arm from Sans’s shoulder and taking Papyrus’s hand in your newly expanded grip. He let you, breath hitching as you turned it over, resting one hand on the underside to cup his much-larger hand and using the other to rub near his wrist, along his fingers, around his palm. “I might not have much human hand-holding experience, but you guys aren’t as warm as we are. It’s really nice, since I’m probably hot and sweaty enough for the both of us.”
“IT FEELS GOOD- AND WARM, AND SOFT…” Papyrus trailed off, watching you touch him, narrow sockets unreadable.
“Is this okay…?” you questioned, because it was always on your mind.
“IT’S-” Papyrus’s voice broke, and he swallowed. “IT’S MORE THAN OKAY.”
You smiled, returning your hands to their previous positions and nuzzling your head against the smooth skull beside it. Right then, you didn’t care about all of the horrible things that had happened- you didn’t want to think about how things had gotten to this exact moment because that would just ruin it. What mattered was that this moment was happening, and you had one dear friend sleeping soundly against you and another being open and vulnerable enough to fill you with warmth. Warmth beyond the normal human warmth that’d been established.
“I’m really glad you’re here, Papyrus,” you said, feeling a little awkward but also a little brazen. “I love you.”
Papyrus made a strangled noise before he shoved his bony rear as close to you as it could go, grabbing your hand tight and squeezing for all he was worth.
“I’M GLAD I’M HERE, AND I’M GLAD YOU’RE HERE, AND- A-AND I LOVE YOU, TOO,” he said in a voice that sounded like he meant for it to be quiet, but it was very much not. Volume be damned, it made you smile, and Sans was very clearly used to his brother’s poor noise-management; he didn’t stir in the slightest.
Chapter 31
Notes:
in which reader is a dork
Chapter Text
"So what's your favorite color?"
Papyrus, who was sitting on the couch with you, looked up from the knock-off Rubik's cube he'd recently acquired and seemed to be having a blast messing with.
"PARDON?"
You smiled sheepishly. "Y'know, your favorite color? We've done a lot of heavy emotional bonding, but I still don't know a lot about you. Apart from what Sans has told me... which is a lot, but not from the horse's mouth."
"guilty as charged," Sans confirmed. He was in the armchair, body almost shrimp-like in how he had it curled up to sit with his feet braced on one arm and his back on the other. You'd dug around for things to do, and he was going to town on your old 3DS. Megaman X didn't stand a chance.
"HMM," Papyrus hummed. "WELL, I DO LIKE BLUE! I THINK I'M BIASED IN THAT, THOUGH, AS IT'S THE COLOR OF MY BROTHER AND I'S MAGIC... ORANGE AND YELLOW ARE NICE."
"biased and blue, but pink's kinda neat," Sans added. You could hear him furiously pressing buttons.
"What's your favorite..." you trailed off to think, astoundingly bad at this. "... bug?"
"the classic questions, old as time," Sans said with poorly concealed amusement. "favorite color, favorite creepy-crawly."
"DO YOU HAVE UNRESOLVED ISSUES WITH AN INSECT?" Papyrus asked in your defense. "IT'S A PERFECTLY VALID QUESTION."
"jeez, lemme think," Sans said, pausing his game. He stared at the ceiling for a moment. "mostly had snails down home, but i like watching the moths throw themselves at the porch light," Sans decided as he turned his skull to give you and his brother a lazy grin. "was that an acceptable answer?"
"Yeah, you even paused to consider it," you praised, and he snorted and went back to gaming. You turned your gaze to Papyrus.
"HOLD ON, I'M STILL THINKING," Papyrus mumbled, hand rubbing his chin, cube sat on the couch beside him. He contemplated a moment longer before his expression brightened. "OH! I'VE ONLY SEEN THEM IN PICTURES, BUT THE ONES WITH THE COOL SCYTHE-Y CLAWS THAT EAT THEIR LOVERS!"
You laughed at the description. "Praying mantises," you provided, and Papyrus beamed.
"YES, THOSE, THE MANTISES OF WORSHIP!"
Sans chuckled and then died in his game, thrown off by the comment.
You stood up, and it made both of the skeletons look at you. "Wanna come check the backyard with me?" you asked, mostly to Papyrus but giving Sans a glance to let him know he was welcome to come, too. "I see them sometimes, but mostly I'd just like to go out and get some sun. I feel like I never do."
"it's cause you don't," Sans commented, and you reached over and poked the back of his skull. He snickered.
Papyrus put his hand in his lap, attention to you and then to the door to the back yard. He seemed a little nervous and had to steady himself to ask: "IT'S DEFINITELY SAFE, RIGHT?"
"It's absolutely safe," you reassured, voice softening at his uncertainty. "It's fenced in and not that big, so unless some crazy squirrel comes after us, we'll be fine.”
"yeah, i slept out there all the time," Sans contributed. "gonna pass right now cause i'm real close to destroying this octopus loser. but you should go look for bugs, bro."
Papyrus frowned but stood. "ALRIGHT! BUT YOU HAVE TO STAY WITHIN FIVE TO TEN FEET OF ME AT ALL TIMES," he commanded, and you saluted.
"Sir, yessir."
Papyrus giggled, a noise that made your heart happy.
You hadn't thought much about it, but Papyrus really hadn't gone outside before. You lead him through the back door after the skeleton had put on some socks, noting that you'd have to get them shoes at some point.
The day was warm, the afternoon bright, and your spirits high. You jumped off the porch, which wasn't saying much given it was about two feet off the ground, and then looked back at your friend with a grin.
He was only a little unsure as he stepped out from beneath the shade of the porch and blinked at the sunlight. He raised his hand to shield his eyes turned skyward.
He stood on the first step for a while, looking at the sparse clouds and the countryside around your home. There weren't any neighbors close enough to see him, and the road was out front and out of sight.
"It's pretty nice out here," you said, scanning the backyard. It might not have been enormous, but it was large enough to house a big tree and several bushes and perennial plants with space to spare. The grass was a little long- you hadn't mowed in a while, and you didn't do more than you needed to be able to traverse.
"IT'S BEAUTIFUL," Papyrus said, looking down at you as he finally stepped the rest of the way off of the structure and into the grass. "WE WEREN'T ON THE SURFACE VERY LONG BEFORE... CERTAIN EVENTS," he said vaguely- he didn't need to be more specific. "I HAVEN'T SEEN MUCH OF THE SUN."
The thought of him being trapped away in some torture chamber, not even allowed to see sunlight, made your chest ache. You pushed it aside and waved your arms to the yard.
"Well, you can come back here as much as you like. Sans hasn't been out here as much, but he'd come out here all the time before you joined the crew. It's nice to just kinda be outdoors sometimes."
Papyrus nodded, but then both of your attention was taken by a black and blue butterfly fluttering through the yard. It landed on one of the bushes for a brief moment before carrying on.
"WOWIE, WHAT A PRETTY BUTTERFLY!" Papyrus said, hesitation dissipating and replaced with excitement. He walked over to the bush it'd landed on. It was really strange to see him outside, in the light of day, his white bones and baggy clothing never having seen it before.
You followed and pointed out a fly on one of the leaves. He gasped and admired a particularly large ant.
"You guys lived in some place called Snowdin, right?" you asked, looking over at Papyrus. He was close beside you, well within the given radius, gingerly holding the leaf that housed the ant.
"CORRECT! IT WAS ALWAYS COLD, BUT THE SNOW WAS PRETTY," he described. "THERE WEREN'T VERY MANY PEOPLE, BUT IT WAS ALRIGHT. WHEN I GOT BORED, I WENT TO SEE MY FRIEND UNDYNE IN WATERFALL!"
"You've mentioned her a few times, what's she like?"
"LOUD, AND STRONG, BUT VERY KIND! IN HER OWN VIOLENT SORT OF WAY," Papyrus smiled as he said it. It faded after a moment to leave him frowning at the bush. "I REALLY HOPE SHE'S OKAY."
"If she's as strong as you say, I'm sure she is," you tried to soothe. You had no way of knowing, but why not try to be hopeful? "What kind of monster was she?"
"WELL, HER HOUSE LOOKED LIKE A FISH, AND SHE IS ALSO FISHY." Papyrus held a hand up to his cheek, splaying his fingers. "SHE HAS SPINY CHEEK FINS- IMAGINE I'M DOING IT ON BOTH SIDES."
You smiled, happy that he was comfortable enough to make light of his limitations and keeping the conversation in happier territory.
"She sounds cool. Hopefully I’ll get to meet her someday."
That made Papyrus beam. "I HOPE SO, TOO!"
You both spotted a caterpillar and the topic was forgotten.
Sans came out eventually, announcing that video games were for babies. When you asked if he'd lost, he said no, that's for babies, too. You had a feeling that he'd lost and gotten annoyed, though.
As you watched Papyrus stretch up and try to touch an overhanging branch, keen on knocking a loose piece of bark off, a thought suddenly hit you.
"Wait, can't you guys use magic?"
That made both skeletons stop dead. Sans was sitting against the tree and was the first to look away and rub his neck.
"WE, UHM. WE CAN. THEORETICALLY," Papyrus said nervously.
You hesitated, feeling the tension but having no idea what had made the atmosphere taut. You looked at Papyrus, who was looking off at the ground, and then at Sans.
"Sorry, uh... was that a bad question?" you asked, now nervous yourself. "I mean- you guys can shapeshift and I heard about monster magic- I figured-"
"nah, you're right. we can, we just... uh..." Sans trailed off as his gaze did the same. He tore it from the fence and met your eyes. "weren't s'posed to."
"Oh." You felt a little stupid with that response, but thankfully Papyrus spoke up to save you from your own stupidity.
"EVEN BEFORE WE WERE... WELL, YOU KNOW. BEFORE THAT- THE HUMANS DIDN'T LIKE US USING MAGIC AND TOLD US NOT TO," Papyrus provided, shifting in his spot. "AND THEN..." He stopped, clearly looking at Sans and waiting for him to take over again.
"not sure exactly how well our little personal hells lined up, but they made damn sure i knew not to use it." Sans's voice was hollow. "not like it mattered- i can't shortcut up here and my attacks were too weak to do much damage." Papyrus nodded along to what he said and offered nothing of his own aside from a deeply saddened expression.
"I'm sorry, I didn't really think about that..." you said, but you weren't going to lie: you were beyond curious. "What's a, uhm... a shortcut?"
"OH, JUST BENDING SPACE A LITTLE TO GET FROM ONE SPOT TO ANOTHER," Papyrus answered, happy to change the subject. "IT WAS INFURIATING UNDERGROUND."
"Wh- like teleporting?!" you spluttered, watching Sans's smile tug up as he shrugged.
"heh, kinda. only to and from certain places, but it was instantaneous travel."
Your open-mouth stare must have said enough.
"but, like i said, i can't do it up here- maybe if i had enough time to get familiar with the place? not sure."
"I BET OUR OTHER MAGIC STILL WORKS, THOUGH!" Papyrus exclaimed. He then fiddled with the hem of his shirt and gave you a worried look. "UHM, YOU KNOW... IF WE CAN USE IT...?"
They looked put off by your incredulous look, so you shut your mouth and waved your hands.
"What the hell- yeah? I just didn't think about it, but- you guys can use magic!" You took an excited step towards Papyrus, who blinked in surprise. "Can you show me?"
"RIGHT NOW?" Papyrus tittered. "ARE YOU SURE?"
"heh, humans are weird," Sans commented. Even though he was sweating, sockets creased in worry, he raised a hand with a single finger pointed up-
And a glowing white bone stuck up out of the ground beside you.
You screamed, making both of the skeletons flinch and the bone attack disappear.
"Oh my god, sorry! Sorry- that scared me, sorry." It was your turn to be nervous, embarrassed even. "That was a magic bone?"
"...yeah," Sans said, hand on his chest like you'd given him a heart palpitation. You felt bad about scaring them, but when you looked to Papyrus...
He was turned away, hand over his mouth, poorly hiding laughter.
"Sorry!" you said, flushing at the sight. "I've never seen magic before!"
"NYEH HEH- IT WAS JUST A BONE!" he teased, shaking away his nerves. His happiness made Sans's melt, too. "YOU SEE BONES EVERY DAY!"
"Not magic bones!"
"technically yeah, magic bones," Sans pointed out, his smile big and genuine. "monsters are made of magic, it's just a different kind than the attack was." He patted the ground beside him, and you quickly plopped down and covered your face in your hands.
"I didn't expect it to come out of the ground..." you mumbled. Sans laughed and pushed your shoulder.
"hey, we're all a little nervous about this, don't feel bad," he comforted. You took your hands away to see Papyrus sit down on Sans's other side to form a triangle. "i'll do it again if you promise not to yell?"
The prospect of seeing the magic again made your embarrassment take a back seat. "Okay. I'll use my indoor voice."
"WE'RE OUTSIDE, BUT THAT WOULD BE APPRECIATED," Papyrus said.
You nodded and then looked at Sans expectantly.
This time, the bone attack he formed was hovering in the air. It was illuminated faintly and almost... ethereal? You could see through it if you really looked hard. And you did, because you had never ever seen magic before and your mind was blown.
You raised a hand to touch it, and Sans floated the little bone further away from you.
"i wouldn't do that, it'll do damage. it's an attack," he explained.
"Oh, right, sorry. Would it kill me?"
"no, i wouldn't float a lethal bone half a foot in front of your face, i know how you love to touch things," Sans said, amused. "it would just hurt a little bit."
"Can I do it?"
"what?"
"I kinda wanna feel it, is that weird?" you asked. Papyrus, who was watching quietly, snickered at your request and Sans's dumbfounded expression.
"HERE, HERE- LET ME DO IT, I CAN MAKE ONE THAT DOESN'T DO DAMAGE," Papyrus said, and just like that Sans's attack was gone and a longer bone was conjured up with a flick of Papyrus's finger.
"you're just gonna let them take an attack?" Sans accused, raising a browbone at his brother.
"YES! IMAGINE IF YOU'D NEVER FELT MAGIC BEFORE, I'M SURE YOU'D WANT TO EVEN IF IT HURT A LITTLE BIT!"
"... fair point, alright," Sans conceded.
You patted your lap like a little kid, giddy at this whole weird exchange. "Okay, so I can for sure touch this one? And I won't die or need to go to the hospital?"
"my bro can control his magic better than any monster i ever met," Sans said, giving his brother a thumbs up. "this one’ll feel like an attack, but it won't hurt."
Papyrus sat up straighter, puffing his chest out at the praise. "I MAY BE A LITTLE RUSTY, BUT EVEN IF I DID DO IT WRONG, YOU WOULD CERTAINLY NOT NEED A HOSPITAL VISIT! BESIDES, I COULD HEAL YOU IF YOU DID-"
"You can heal people?" you interjected, eyes shining.
"YES! BUT WE'RE STILL ON BONE ATTACKS, ONE THING AT A TIME!" Papyrus chided, though he sounded the opposite of upset. You were glad that your own dumb, naive joy at discovering magic was making this easier for them.
"Okay, you're right, okay. I'm gonna touch it."
Papyrus nodded. Sans watched as you reached out in front of you, taking in the magic and looking through it at the vague shape of Papyrus on the other side.
Your finger grazed the attack and it disappeared into thin air, where it had come from, sending a jolt of not-pain through you that felt like a shock without a sting. You shivered at the sensation, entirely alien, before you started smiling.
"THAT DIDN'T HURT, DID IT?" Papyrus worried, but you waved it away immediately.
"It felt cool, can we do it again?"
Papyrus was silent, watching you in some combination of amusement and curiosity. Sans chuckled.
Another bone was conjured, another bone was poked, and another magic zap went through you like soft lightning.
You had Papyrus do it four more times before you were satiated... for the moment.
Chapter 32
Notes:
i rarely use author's notes to say anything of substance but THANKS SO MUCH TO EVERYBODY WHO COMMENTS I read and cherish them all and i do my best to respond (i'm very sorry if i don't, that's my fault, i'm forgor), comments really are the fuel to keep writing for me, so THANKS!! THANK YOU!
Chapter Text
You'd noticed that Sans had nightmares. It would have been hard not to when he was a blaster, as you'd come to understand was the term for the skeletons on all fours. Lying in a dog bed on the floor, you'd watch his paws twitch and hear tiny, painful whimpers interspersed in his shallow breathing. You'd always woken him up, if you were able to- you didn't want to shout at him, so if simply saying his name a few times didn't work, you'd let him be and try again in a couple of minutes.
But now he was Sans, not Tib, and his nightmares didn't seem as common or as intense. Papyrus seemed to have more, but he’d rarely slept around you until recently, so you only had the sad noises that drifted down the stairs to go off of.
You were downstairs indulging in some late-night soda and reading, Papyrus doing the same minus the drink, when you heard a shout so hoarse it was almost a bark from the floor above. Papyrus was in the arm chair and you were on the couch, but you were both on your feet a second after the disturbance.
He looked at you, sockets widened in worry, and you followed him up the stairs. He was taller and his legs were longer, so he was much faster, and you were cresting the top of the steps just in time to see him freeze in the doorway.
"nnghno, nope, nn-not- not happ-happenin-" you could hear Sans's strained voice from inside the room, pitched up in some horrid emotion. You hurried over and Papyrus flinched, backing out of the doorway and into the hall.
You didn't understand until you looked into the room and saw Sans, half under his blanket and fully off of his mattress, grabbing at his skull.
Which had ridges. You swallowed as you saw the start of a tail and claws.
You went in and got down beside him in the dim lighting of the bedroom, heart racing as he scrambled for purchase on the carpet.
"Hey, hey, what's going on?" you asked, hands hovering in uncertainty.
"m'not doin' it," Sans hissed through gritted teeth. A shudder of pain went through him, bones cracking. "nn- don't- wanna-"
You looked to the doorway, where Papyrus still stood. His sockets were wide and he was crying just like his brother. He didn't come into the room.
"Papyrus, what's happening?" you asked, because you were scared and Sans was in a lot of pain and you had no clue why.
He grimaced and looked away. "HH. HE PROBABLY HAD A NIGHTMARE AND NOW- HIS MAGIC'S T-TRYING TO SHIFT, AND. AND HE ISN'T LETTING IT."
Sans yelped, curling up on his side and grabbing at his skull, fingers now sharp enough to scratch the surface. His face had elongated into a small muzzle.
You watched helplessly, mind moving way too fast, before you turned to the other upset skeleton.
"He'll be fine if he turns into a blaster?"
Papyrus nodded slowly, gaze locked on Sans’s contorted body.
"Okay, okay, I... I'll stay with him, if you wanna go."
The monster sucked in a breath, maybe to protest, but then Sans growled in the same breath as he sobbed, folded over in pain, and the protest died in Papyrus's throat.
He went without another word, tears in his sockets, and you turned your attention to the skeleton on the floor.
"Sans-"
"m'not d- nn- doin' it-" he hissed, his voice strained and interrupted with pained moans. His legs were longer, toes stretching out into rear claws. The blue-tinged tears poured down his face as he convulsed in waves of pain.
"It's okay," you tried, and you finally put a hand on his skull. He opened his sockets to look at you, the contact making his breath hitch.
"d-" He cried out as his magic pulsed in insistence, apparently spurred to life by a terrible dream. He was shaking so hard, and sweating, and your chest was burning.
"don't- d- don’t make me-" he sobbed, voice breaking.
"Shh, hey, I'm not gonna make you do anything," you said softly, feeling his magic crackle in the air around you. It was strange as all magic was to you, but his, so it was also familiar. "But- but it's okay . It's okay."
"no it ain't- nn- can't-"
"It's okay," you repeated, rubbing his skull and shifting on the floor to be closer to him, pulling the blanket away before his straining limbs could get tangled in it. "It's just you, like this or like that. It's not different, and it’ll be okay." You didn't know what to say or what he needed to hear. He cried at the words and you drew his claws away from his skull to stop him from scratching it further, letting him grab your hand tight.
"I'm here," you said, squeezing it. "You're still Sans no matter what, and… you're my friend, and I don't want you to get hurt."
His sockets found yours, desperate and conflicted, before he heaved himself up and wrapped his arms around your midsection, grabbing on so tight it hurt and pressing his shuddering bones to you.
You held him and made what small noises of reassurance you could manage around your tight throat and broken heart. He clung to you like a lifeline as he finally relaxed, shivered, and then brightened the whole room with his magic as he let himself shift.
It was really, really weird to feel his body change against you, but you didn't even think about pushing him away. You pet the back of his ribs as he whined and whimpered, collapsing into your lap.
He looked so worn, so tired. He stared at you, face long and fangs parted to pant, and he cried.
"I've got you, I'm here," you consoled, placing a hand on the side of his skull. He leaned into the touch and you ignored the tears that fell onto your skin. "This is okay, you're okay.”
Sans didn’t say anything- he couldn’t. He weakly pressed close to you, catching his breath through his tears.
“Do you want to go lay on your bed?” you asked softly, stroking his back.
Sans nodded. You didn't know if he had the strength, so you gently scooped him up halfway and made the awkward shuffle.
"There you go, that's gotta be more comfortable," you said as you laid him down. You sat back on your legs beside the mattress, still rubbing his skull. "You want some space?"
He whined, nosing into your hand, and you smiled at him despite how much this all hurt.
"Okay, I'll take that as a 'no'," you said, hoping to keep the tone from falling into downright despair. "Can I sit with you?"
He tapped his claw, which you'd established as 'yes', and you got up to go behind him. HIs bed was messy and the sheet was coming off of one corner, but you didn't care. You sat, and he awkwardly shuffled to once again have his skull in your lap. You took a deep breath to compose yourself as you laid one hand on his head and took one of his claws in the other, making him tense.
"I know you can't hold it back very well, but is this fine?" you softly asked. His expression shifted, the last of his tears fell, and he nodded before closing his sockets.
You ran your fingers over the scars around his wrists until his exhausted, battered bones relaxed. His breathing evened out.
A couple of minutes later, Papyrus’s head inched into the doorway and peeked in at the two of you.
“I-IS HE OKAY?” the still-talking skeleton asked- you could easily see the tears in his sockets.
"Does 'okay as you can be' sound accurate?" you asked down at Sans, who huffed but nodded his head a little. He didn't look at Papyrus.
"... IS IT OKAY IF I COME IN?"
The anxiety in his voice, coupled with the way it broke on the last word, nearly made you start crying again.
It did make Sans start crying again as he whimpered and nodded.
Papyrus's steps were hesitant, and as he sat down on the floor right in front of his brother and sobbed, Sans sobbed with him. Still, he didn’t look at Papyrus, instead awkwardly using a paw to rub at his snout and whine.
Papyrus seemed disturbed, deeply upset, but trying so hard. You met his sockets and grimaced, hoping to convey that this really sucked and you didn’t blame him for being such a mess.
He reached out a hand and gently laid it on Sans’s shoulder blade, scooting closer and rubbing gently.
A raw noise of pain came out of Sans’s throat at the touch. He shakily rose and, as much as the exhausted skeleton was able to, threw himself into Papyrus’s lap.
Though surprised, Papyrus recovered quickly and grabbed Sans up into a desperate hug.
"I'M SORRY," he whined, squeezing Sans hard. You could tell he was trying to keep himself composed for his brother. "IT’S NOT YOU, THIS ISN’T BAD- I JUST... I-I SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT, I'M SORRY-"
Sans keened out a whine in return and pressed his muzzle against Papyrus's chest, nuzzling into it like the force could make Papyrus stop talking.
He succeeded, but it didn't stop the tears.
"Papyrus, shh, deep breaths," you tried gently. "It's okay to get upset, and I don’t think Sans is mad?" you said it like a question as you reached out and touched the poor guy’s shoulder.
Sans exhaled hard and shook his head. He was shaking, and as you watched, he tensed up and grunted, bones glowing a little bit-
But they faded again as nothing happened. Well, nothing apart from him sobbing frantically as he realized he didn't have the strength to shift back.
"OH, P-PLEASE DON'T, BROTHER, YOU'LL HURT YOURSELF," Papyrus begged, trying to soothe away the panic with gentle touches. "IT'S OKAY! EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY, THE HUMAN IS RIGHT."
Sans whimpered and closed his sockets, and you rubbed his back while his brother kept him close and pet his skull.
"Do you wanna lay down? Papyrus and I can hang out right here with you," you offered, looking to the un-shifted skeleton in confirmation.
"YES! WE'LL BE RIGHT HERE!" he replied. Sans turned his head enough to look over at you and then up at his brother, who gave him a watery smile. "I'M SURE YOU'LL BE RECHARGED AFTER A LITTLE REST. IF I HAD TO GUESS, USING MAGIC PROBABLY STIRRED EVERYTHING UP INTO A WEIRD LIFE-FORCE SOUP AND MADE THINGS UNSTABLE, BUT-! THIS SORT OF THING ALWAYS EVENS OUT!" Papyrus seemed to be comforting Sans and also himself.
Sans nodded. Papyrus helped him back onto the bed where he quickly curled up, his shaking beginning to die down as he tucked his legs in and made himself as round and as small as he could. It would be cute, you thought, if not for how deeply fucked up it was. You sat on one side, taking over the head-rubs, and Papyrus took up the ideal spot to run soothing hands over his back and ribs.
"NOW I COMMAND YOU TO TAKE A NAP," Papyrus joked lightly, and it succeeded in making Sans huff in tired, subdued amusement. "I KNOW IT IS ANTITHETICAL TO MY VIEWS ON EXCESSIVE SLEEPING, BUT I'M MAKING AN EXCEPTION FOR MY FAVORITE BROTHER."
"Will us talking keep you up?" you asked, already knowing that Sans would shake his head (which he did) but wanting to be sure regardless.
"OH, THAT'S GOOD, BECAUSE I WANTED TO ASK ABOUT WHAT SORT OF YARD WORK NEEDS TO BE DONE," Papyrus began, giving his brother a soft look as Sans let out a deep breath and properly relaxed. "AS YOU KNOW, I'M VERY GOOD AT BEING HELPFUL AND PERFORMING TASKS."
"I do know that, yeah," you replied. You knew Papyrus had issues seeing his brother like this, and even if you didn't know exactly why, you were happy that he was here to help and proud of him for it. You hoped that your casual conversation helped Sans feel at ease.
As you listed off some chores that needed done and Papyrus emphatically agreed to do them before bashfully asking what all they entailed, Sans began to quietly snore.
Chapter Text
Papyrus inevitably left your cuddle gathering with instructions to tell Sans, when he woke up, that he was too energetic to sit still and would come back once Sans wasn't snoring. He didn't have to explicitly say that he was worried about his brother or that he hated the thought of Sans thinking he'd done something wrong and needed to be avoided.
You, however, were content to sit on your phone, which Papyrus kindly brought to you, and stay with him. It was nice to be able to pet him- you would probably never voice that thought for fear of making them embarrassed or upset, but if you were a dog you'd love to be pet, so... you pet Sans's ribs along where they joined to his spine, feeling the rise and fall of his chest. You didn't know why it did that, since he very clearly lacked lungs, but you'd go crazy if you started to question all the things that kept the magic skeletons in your house alive.
You were neck-deep in reading an article about a lake in Siberia when Sans stirred. You glanced over to see his tired sockets watching the bed in a melancholy emotion that was hard to pinpoint on his canine face.
"Good morning, sleepyhead," you said quietly, making his gaze drift to you. "Actually, it's about four, but that's the morning if you're really ambitious."
He exhaled a bit harder than usual, and you were going to take that as a laugh. Sans groaned as he untucked his limbs and shuffled over to put his head on your thigh, closing his sockets again.
You didn't get a chance to speak before the room was illuminated. It took a bit longer than it usually did, but as you blinked to refocus your eyes, you found a humanoid skeleton in your lap.
Well... mostly humanoid.
"fuck..." Sans breathed, reaching up a shaking hand to feel the much smaller, rounder snout on his face and the bumpy ridges along the back of his skull. He grimaced as he caught his breath.
"Woah," you said, having absolutely no idea they could half shift. "Are you okay?"
"peachy," Sans grumbled, turning his head back to see a tail- albeit a much shorter one than before- sticking out of his shorts. He glared at it for a moment before putting his head back on your leg and curling up. His arms and hands were just about normal again, but his back legs were still a little bent like they were in his blaster form.
"Physically, though?" you pressed, holding his shoulder. "I don't blame you for being grumpy, I just want to make sure you're not in pain."
"doesn't hurt," he replied, voice low. It was strange to see him like this, but pretty cool. You decided to keep that to yourself for now.
"Papyrus wanted me to tell you that he's down cleaning- I can go get him now that you're up again, he's just not good at sitting still."
Sans took in a shaky breath. He looked down at his hands, and you noticed that they did still have claws and weren't entirely 'normal' again.
"eh, if he doesn't wanna see me like this, i'll be fine," Sans said weakly. He was speaking softly to avoid his voice breaking, or maybe to not let his brother know he was awake, or maybe both. "i wouldn't wanna see me like this, either."
"I don't know if this helps, but... if you ignore all the really messed up stuff that happened to make this not cool, then you look kinda badass," you said, failing to keep it to yourself, using your free hand to rub one of the residual skull ridges. "You're like a werewolf. Which is just another kind of monster we made up, so it's really not that different."
"it's pretty hard to ignore," Sans argued. You frowned at the tears threatening his voice, guilt creeping up at making light of what was happening.
"You're right, I'm sorry," you began. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
"it sucks that i don't have a choice."
You went silent, watching his hands clench into the sheets. "i couldn't stop it. my soul decided i had to when i was having some stupid dream, and now i'm-" he stopped, huffing and burying his snout into the mattress. "couldn't even tell pap to just stay away."
"Did you want him to?" you asked, having trouble finding words to address everything he'd said.
"no- i just make it worse for him." Sans shuddered. "i don't care if it's different now, he'll always make it better, but... but i make it worse."
"Sans..." you breathed, stomach turning at his words. "I think he just needed a minute."
"i didn't think he'd come back," Sans admitted. "not till i was me again, y'know, but- i'm still..."
"You're still you," you stated, leaning down and hugging him. "I get that it's hard, but right now you're just Sans with some cool blaster aesthetics..." You looked at the wall for a moment, trying to figure out what you were trying to say. "You're Sans all the time, the blaster stuff is just... in addition to that. Not in spite of it."
Sans tried to hide his tears, but he didn’t do a good job. He did succeed in hiding his face, so you reached over and helped him out by covering his shaking form up with the blanket and rubbing his shoulder.
“Papyrus wants to come back and make sure you’re okay,” you said. “If him being here would make you feel better, he wants to be here. He told me that.”
"just- give him a heads up?" Sans requested weakly.
"Okay, no problem," you replied as you stood, mindful not to step on him or lose balance on the mattress and crush his tail. "You need a drink or anything?"
"water'd be nice, thanks."
You patted his head in response, not trusting your voice to be steady and knowing he wouldn't see a nod. You could say as many nice things as you wanted, and you would, but this was a lot for him. Seeing your roommate so distressed about what seemed like a natural part of himself was... distressing.
You found Papyrus doing exactly as he'd described, rinsing the dishes from dinner before loading them into the dishwasher. He heard you knock on the counter and turned.
"IS HE AWAKE?" he asked as quietly as his loud, bold voice could ever manage.
"Yeah, and still about 20% blaster." You moved your hand to mime elongating your whole face, whispering as you went to stand beside Papyrus. You leaned against the counter and crossed your arms. "He's really upset... he probably doesn't want me to tell you, but he thinks he makes it worse for you and that you should just stay away from him."
Papyrus didn't respond. You were hesitant to look at him, knowing there'd be no positive emotion on his skull; when you managed, you discovered that you were completely correct.
Papyrus held the red fabric of his shirt, like he was trying to clutch his soul. Fresh tears rolled down his face, and it made a sad noise escape your own throat.
"Hug?" you wobbled, and he nodded fiercely and made the first move in wrapping his arm around you and pulling you against him.
"I SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT. I SHOULDN'T HAVE... NOT GONE TO HIM, WHEN I WAS... BEFORE." Papyrus spoke quietly yet with so much emotion in his voice. He shivered against you. "IT HURTS TO SEE HIM LIKE THAT BUT- BUT IT'S NOT HIS FAULT! IT'S NOT HIM!"
"I know..." you said, patting his back before you pulled away.
"DOES..." Papyrus stopped to look away. "DOES HE REALLY NOT WANT ME THERE?"
"He really, really wants you there," you replied. You couldn't stand just standing there and wallowing in the sadness, so you went and got a cup to fill for Sans. "I think he might be scared how much he wants you there."
Papyrus stood up taller, the movement at odds with the sob it produced, and he got a look of resolution about him. "THEN I'LL BE THERE. IF HE DOESN'T CARE THAT I'M A MESS AND I'LL CRY MORE THAN HE DOES, I'LL BE THERE."
"I'll be there for both of you, and I don't have a lot of really nasty stuff in my brain involving bone dogs, so... if things get too hard, promise you'll let me pick up the slack and talk to your brother about it later?"
"I APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN FOR US,AND THE OFFER, BUT..." Papyrus struggled to maintain his determination, but he shook himself of doubt. "BUT IF DOING THIS-" he waved to the room and the avoidance it represented- "MAKES HIM THINK HE'S ANYTHING LESS THAN MY OLDER BROTHER THAT I LOVE WITH ALL MY SOUL DESPITE HIS LAZY NAPS AND TERRIBLE JOKES, THEN- THEN I HAVE TO NOT DO THIS."
You took in his shaking hand and the way his brow was furrowed with the strength it took to say what he'd said. You nodded.
"You're a good person," you said abruptly. It surprised Papyrus as much as it surprised you, but he wasn't upset; while you blushed at your own open words, Papyrus smiled.
"THANK YOU! I GET IT FROM MY BROTHER."
Notes:
*EDIT* thanks to everybody who commented to help w my school assignment!! much appreciated :]
Chapter Text
Papyrus went into the room with a glass of water and no human. You had agreed to let him talk to his brother alone, and even though the activity made Papyrus more anxious than he'd ever been just talking to his brother, he still went. Alone.
If seeing his brother as a blaster hurt, then seeing him completely covering himself up to hide it hurt so, so much worse.
"SANS, YOU'VE TRIED THAT TRICK TOO MANY TIMES FOR ME TO FALL FOR IT," Papyrus said as he took a heavy seat on the edge of the bed, watching the lump apprehensively. "I KNOW YOU'RE UNDER THERE."
"i know you know," he mumbled, the lump shifting.
"IF YOU KNOW THAT I KNOW, THEN PLEASE COME OUT?" Papyrus tried, tapping the very ends of his fingers on the glass, shifting a pinky down to support its weight. If he had two hands, he would be able to tap much better and make more soothing sounds... oh well.
Sans hesitated, but the blanket eventually came off. Sans stared down at the sheets, visibly shaking and avoiding his brother's sockets.
Oh, so he really was... huh... Papyrus blinked as he took in the state of Sans's body, surprised that this was possible in the first place. He still had the blanket over his bottom half, but Papyrus could see his tail as it moved now and then under the fabric.
"THAT DOESN'T HURT, DOES IT?" Papyrus asked gently, holding the glass over as Sans sat up, glancing at him with tired eyes as he accepted it. His fingers had sharp tips on them.
"no. just feels weird."
"HAVE YOU DONE IT BEFORE?" Papyrus asked, watching uncertainly as Sans drank from his small, rounded muzzle.
"nah." he drank another sip, looking at the floor. "you?"
"I HAVE NOT," Papyrus replied. "I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WE COULD."
"think my magic just gave out somewhere through the process," Sans mumbled, gulping down the rest of his drink and then setting it aside to rub at his arm. "definitely wasn't intentional."
"I-I GUESS..." Papyrus took a deep breath. He didn't like talking about this very much, but he was here to help his brother. "I GUESS IT'S PRACTICAL TO HAVE CLAWS AND A TAIL BUT STILL BE ABLE TO SPEAK! IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS, CERTAINLY!"
Sans took his brother in with gauging sockets before he rubbed at his face and nodded. He chuckled. "it's kinda bullshit we can't talk."
Papyrus smiled, the morbid conversation bringing just the right kind of light to the situation. "IT ISN'T LIKE A BLASTER MOUTH IS ANY WORSE FOR WORD-FORMING THAN A SKELETON MOUTH! IT REALLY DOESN'T MAKE SENSE."
Sans hummed, which sounded a lot rougher in his half-shifted state.
"this is... uh, okay, right?" Sans asked, uncharacteristically nervous as he watched his brother for a reaction. "this doesn't bother you?"
"NO!" Papyrus said a little too loudly, making his brother flinch. He apologized, deflating. "IT'S FINE... REALLY! A-ACTUALLY, THIS MAKES IT FEEL MORE... NORMAL. LIKE IT ISN'T JUST BEING A SKELETON OR A BLASTER, BUT SOME KIND OF SKELETON-BLASTER SPECTRUM... DOES THAT MAKE SENSE?"
"yeah, it does. i'm still gonna change back when i've got the juice, but i see what you're saying."
They sat in silence for a few moments until Papyrus could defy his urges no longer. He scooted closer to his brother and gave him a hug, wrapping his arm around his ribcage and snuggling in.
"I'M ALWAYS GOING TO BE HERE IF YOU NEED ME," Papyrus mumbled, keeping his voice low so it didn't break. He sniffled. "SO- SO PLEASE DON'T THINK TWICE ABOUT NEEDING ME. I TOOK CARE OF YOU FOR YEARS BACK UNDERGROUND, SO I’M VERY GOOD AT BEING NEEDED!"
"heh. okay, bro," Sans wobbled in reply, wrapping his arms around Papyrus's neck and holding him tight. "the human told on me, didn't they?"
"THEY DID, AND I'M GLAD THEY DID!" Papyrus admonished, squeezing tighter as he did so. "BESIDES, IT'S GETTING A LITTLE EASIER TO... TO REMEMBER THIS IS SOMETHING THAT WE CAN DO WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT THE BAD STUFF ALONG WITH IT."
"yeah... it still ain't easy, but it's not as terrible."
"EXACTLY..." Papyrus pulled away, wiping his tears before patting his brother on the shoulder a couple of times, grinning to dissipate the sad atmosphere. "THE HUMAN IS MAKING COOKIES, SO COME ALONG! YOU MUST SCOOP THE BATTER. IT'S CHALLENGING WITH A SINGLE HAND AND THEY ARE TOO TEMPTED BY RAW EGGS AND BUTTER TO DO IT WITHOUT EATING A LOT IN THE PROCESS."
"okay, seems reasonable," he agreed. He was sweating, nervous about the exposure, but he had a job.
Papyrus stood for a moment only to squat down right in front of the bed. "ALL ABOARD!"
"i'm pretty sure i can walk-"
"CHOO CHOO, SOMEBODY ISN'T LISTENING!" Papyrus shouted, holding his arm behind him and wiggling his fingers. "ALL ABOARD THE PIGGYBACK!"
A loud sigh was Sans's response before a weight landed on Papyrus, two thin arms wrapped around his neck. The taller looped his arm around Sans's leg and stood, hardly thrown off by the weight. Sans didn't weigh very much; he was more thrown off by the little tail that wrapped around the side of his pelvis, limply stabilizing his passenger.
"PLEASE KEEP YOUR HANDS AND FEET AND TAIL INSIDE THE RIDE AT ALL TIMES!" Papyrus instructed, adjusting his brother and leaning to his good side so Sans didn’t fall off the other.
"is this a train or a roller coaster?"
"BOTH! DON'T TALK BACK TO THE CONDUCTOR!"
"are you the conductor or the train?"
"BOTH! NO MORE QUESTIONS!"
"okay, okay."
Notes:
i finished the draft of original little red soooo i wanna write some fanfiction while i give that whole thing a little break to come back later w fresh eyes. shiny new peepers!! thanks everybody for reading and commenting, it means the world MWUAH that's my kiss for you
Chapter 35
Notes:
proof that i'm not JUST writing the papyrus/reader fic- tho it is fun and i'm having a blast w it and you should read it if you want to!! it's relatively slow burn and they're friends way before they consider romantic stuff, soo... yeah thanks ily :]
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
After Sans was once again a 100% humanoid skeleton, things settled down. Another check-in from the rescue was looming on the horizon, but Papyrus seemed more stable and willing to address some of his concerns both with you and his brother.
You recalled an earlier thought over dinner.
"We could always fake your deaths."
Papyrus and Sans stopped eating the salads you'd thrown together and looked up at you sharply across the table.
"I mean- I know it's extreme, I just had the thought and wanted to share it..." you added, looking down at your own salad in contemplation. "I don't want you guys to keep having to do the stupid check-ins or worry about the Positive Paws people bothering you..."
"IT'S... ONE SOLUTION, I SUPPOSE," Papyrus said after finishing his bite.
"i don't hate the idea, but wouldn't it make you look bad?" Sans asked, using his fork to point in your direction. "how are you gonna explain both of your rescue dogs dying at the same time?"
"I mean... I probably couldn't." You sighed, sitting back in your chair. "I doubt there's really any legal action they could take, though? I don't know if they even would."
"COULDN'T WE JUST... TELL THEM? ABOUT US?"
It was your turn to raise your head sharply and take in Papyrus's face. His sockets went your way for only a moment before being averted again.
"it'd be a risk, bro," Sans mumbled. "not that i'm sayin' we shouldn't, but... y'know..."
"We could just tell Becky. She seems cool with monsters, and then it would just be one person... assuming she doesn't blab," you offered up for consideration.
All three of you stared at your salads, deep in thought. You pushed around a tomato until Papyrus cleared his throat.
"I THINK WE SHOULD TELL HER, AT LEAST. IT FEELS WRONG TO LIE TO HER." He sat up straighter. "IF WE EXPLAIN THE SITUATION, I DON'T THINK SHE'D DO ANYTHING BAD. SHE SEEMS NICE!"
"she does..." Sans agreed reluctantly. "if she knew, i bet she'd help cover for us down the line if we do pretend to dust."
"It's up to you guys, honestly," you said. "Becky hasn't given me any reason to think she's secretly an asshole, so... how about you guys think about it for a couple days?"
"sounds good."
"THAT'S A GOOD IDEA."
After dinner, Sans and Papyrus went upstairs, and you stayed in the kitchen to clean up. You hadn't even considered telling other people about your monster roommates, but if they were comfortable with the idea, you wouldn't try to oppose it.
The dirty dishes were too few to warrant unloading the dishwasher, so you washed the couple of cutting boards and bowls by hand. It probably didn't make sense and was overall less efficient to do it that way, but you didn't mind.
You put the last bowl away and turned around to spot one of Sans's socks laying by the stairs. You never saw him take his socks off, how did he manage to leave them everywhere? The sight made you smile, though, as you went over and picked it up. For a long time, neither of them had left so much as a dirty cup lying around, and it felt like they barely lived here. The sock, in your eyes, was a good sign. Sans felt at home enough to make a mess.
It still needed to be returned, though.
As you made your way up the stairs, you saw that their bedroom door was halfway open. You quietly walked over, hearing no voices, and took a look inside: Sans was sound asleep and snoring softly, and Papyrus was nowhere to be found. You smiled and tossed the sock into the room and left, not wanting to wake the skeleton up.
The upstairs bathroom's light was on, which answered your question of where Papyrus was. They showered every now and then, but otherwise the bathrooms were only used by you. The door was open, though, so you gave into your nosy urges and walked over.
Papyrus was inside, standing before the sink and looking at his reflection in the mirror. His finger traced the path of his most noticeable scar.
You were about to back away, clearly interrupting a personal moment, but Papyrus spotted you and jolted.
"Sorry- I saw the light on and, uh... sorry," you stuttered, but Papyrus looked even more embarrassed than you did.
"I-IT'S OKAY, THE DOOR WAS OPEN..." he said, but then he looked at his reflection again and his sockets fell.
You weren't sure what to say, but your friend looked very sad. You let out a deep breath.
"Sans is sleeping, wanna come hang in the living room with me...?" you asked, to which Papyrus nodded.
He followed you back down, taking a seat beside you on the couch and pulling his legs up to hold against his chest. You had no clue what to say, but you couldn't say nothing.
"Do you want to, uh... talk about anything?" you asked awkwardly, shifting to face him a bit more.
"... I DO, BUT IT FEELS SILLY," he admitted. Papyrus rested his chin heavily on his knees. “COMPARED TO EVERYTHING ELSE.”
"Whatever it is, I promise I'll take it seriously," you offered.
Papyrus took a moment before looking over at you and finding his voice again.
"I'M STILL GETTING USED TO HOW I LOOK NOW, AND I... I DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO SEE THE CRACKS AND KNOW WHERE THEY CAME FROM," he said, the words making him wince. "IF WE TELL BECKY, SHE'LL KNOW, AND... AND IF WE FIND THE OTHER MONSTERS AGAIN, THEY'D KNOW SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED."
The pain you felt was familiar, yet still unpleasant. You reached over, looking to Papyrus to make sure it was okay, and you put your hand on the closest knee.
"I think I get what you're saying," you said gently.
"I DON'T THINK SANS DOES. HE SAYS I SHOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK, AND THAT I DON'T HAVE TO TELL ANYBODY WHAT HAPPENED, BUT I DON'T WANT TO LIE TO THEM, EITHER." Papyrus looked at your hand before sniffling and scooting over to lean against you. Now that the barrier to physical intimacy had been broken, Papyrus seemed keen on seeking it out. You were keen to indulge him.
"Well, Sans has a point, but it's easier said than done," you conceded as you put your arm around Papyrus's shoulders. "It's okay to be upset about the scars."
"I DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO LOOK AT ME AND JUST SEE THE BAD THINGS," he said, much quieter.
You squeezed him against your side. "I don't think they will, not after they know you. I don't."
"YOU DON'T..." he agreed with a huff.
"But that doesn't mean you can't be upset about it, or talk about it if you want to. I'm here to listen."
"I KNOW, THANK YOU," Papyrus said earnestly, nuzzling into your shoulder. "HYPOTHETICALLY, IF. IF I ASK WHAT THINGS YOU SEE IN ME THAT AREN'T THE BAD THINGS...?" he ventured hesitantly.
"Well... on a physical level, I see that you're tall, and you always stand up straight, and that you're a skeleton," you began, "and deeper than that? You're really strong, and brave, and funny, and you and Sans are such good brothers to one another, and you're a really great friend." You rubbed his shoulder and leaned your head against his, trying to say with your soul the same thing you said with your mouth.
"... DO YOU REALLY MEAN ALL OF THAT?" he asked, face hidden in your clothes.
"Yeah, of course I do. Obviously I notice the cracks and the arm sometimes, but it's definitely not all I see. I see the good and neutral things way more."
"...THANK YOU," Papyrus wobbled in reply, and you pulled him even closer so you could wrap your arms around him for a fuller, better hug. He caved at the touch and hugged you right back.
Notes:
THANKS SO MUCH to everybody that reads this fic and any of my other ones- comments really honestly make my day SO much better and I appreciate y'all a bunch!
Chapter 36
Notes:
tib and rib... short for tibothy and ribrian
Chapter Text
The decision to tell Becky was made. It was only a few days later that the familiar van pulled into the driveway.
"She's here," you called. In your discussions, Papyrus had offered to shift back to all fours while Sans remained unshifted and out of sight until you'd explained what was going on. You were beyond anxious, maybe even scared, but they'd both agreed that doing this was what they wanted. You had contingency plans for if Becky reacted poorly, though none if she outright refused to care. It wasn't like you'd kill the poor woman.
Papyrus sat in the living room entryway, his claws finding much easier traction there than the hardwood floor of the kitchen and dining room. You glanced at him before looking back out of the window and seeing Becky approach the door.
No backing out now…
"Good afternoon!" the Positive Paws employee greeted, ever cheery. You smiled and beckoned her in.
"Good afternoon, it's nice to see you," you replied as she slipped her shoes off and sat her bag aside, standing up straight to smile.
She caught sight of Papyrus and it grew even bigger.
"Hey there, Rib!" she said, looking to you for permission to enter the house. You nodded and led the way, listening to her usual chatter and comments about the skeletons. She didn't try to touch Papyrus, but you pulled up a chair for her to sit in while she took him in.
The monster shifted his paws uneasily on the carpet, standing up after a while and walking slowly past Becky and over to you. He sat against your leg and leaned into you, face pressed into your pants. You swallowed and rested your hand on his head, which was about waist-height.
"Oh my goodness!" Becky cooed, taking in the sight with soft eyes. "He's doing so well, I'm very impressed." The woman looked around and hummed. "Where's Tib hiding, if I might ask?"
Ah. The question.
"He's, uhm... in my bedroom, but I wanted to talk to you about something first..." you said awkwardly, rubbing the top of Papyrus's skull to ground you and hopefully comfort him. "It's about these two, and it's kinda serious."
"What's wrong, hun?" she asked in concern, your voice clearly warranting it. "Are they alright?"
"They're fine, but... you know how monsters have magic?"
Becky nodded, brows knitting.
"Well, they can use it."
"Oh, dear... what can they do? I hope nothing destructive," Becky asked, looking at 'Rib' and frowning. "They'd never used magic at the rescue, though I guess in hindsight it was silly to assume they can't."
"They can shapeshift," you blurted, just wanting to get it over with. Papyrus was shaking, and you weren't far from it yourself. "This isn't actually what they look like most of the time."
Becky didn't reply, obviously confused, and then her eyes went to the short hallway connecting the dining room to your bedroom and she gasped.
You turned and saw Sans, hunched and leaning against the wall, his hands shoved into the pockets of his hoodie. He only met Becky's eyes for a second before looking away again.
"yeah, uh... hey," he said softly, awkwardly.
"What in the- you're joking, right?" Becky accused, looking back to you as she stood up from the chair, eyes darting between the three of you in confused fear. "I-I don't..."
"I'm really, really not," you said, sighing and rubbing your face. "I mean, he's obviously an actual skeleton monster."
Becky shook her head, taking a step towards the door.
Uh oh.
"Wait, Becky, let me explain-" you tried, but the woman laughed nervously and shook her head once more.
"That's not... that's not possible," she deadpanned. "I don't know what's going on here, but- but I need to leave."
She'd started moving towards the door, but then her body was surrounded in blue magic and she fell to her knees.
"What?!" she shouted, panicked, and you looked at Sans's outstretched hand and nodded to him. He looked close to tears.
"Becky, I’m sorry, but please calm down," you said as you went over, getting down beside her as the woman tried and failed to haul herself back to her feet. The gravity magic Sans had demonstrated the day before was working just as intended.
"Is this magic?" she asked, looking down at her hands. "Let me go!" She continued her attempts to stand, her breathing picking up as she was pinned to the floor.
Papyrus whined, and then Sans was kneeling beside the two of you. Becky flinched away from him, and the concept of somebody being scared of Sans would've been funny any other day.
"i get bein' freaked out, but please... we need you to listen," Sans practically begged, his hand still held before him to keep the blue magic in place.
Becky opened her mouth, but then her eyes went to the marks around Sans's wrists, just visible below the sleeves of his hoodie.
She stopped struggling. Sans noticed where she was looking and he winced, but... after a moment of quiet, he let his magic fade and hesitantly pushed the sleeves on both arms up and out of the way. He held out his arms, unable to look anywhere but the floor.
You knew it didn't feel good to realize what had happened. Becky just stared at the marks, identical to the ones on Tib, and she must have noticed how hard Sans's hands were shaking. She swallowed.
"You're really...?" she asked hoarsely, softly.
"tib? …yeah." Sans sat back, pushing the sleeves back down to hide himself again. "but, uh... my name's actually sans."
Becky just stared at him. The clack of Papyrus's claws drew her attention to Sans's side, where he sat down with some distance between himself and the new human.
"So he's...?" Becky asked, shaken.
"papyrus. we thought it'd be easier to explain if one of us was still... y'know."
"They can't talk when they're on all fours," you added.
The fear was gone, leaving Becky looking shocked and stuck trying to process what the hell was going on. You gave her a feeble smile, trying to lighten the mood and catch her attention.
"I know it's a lot... will you let us explain?" you asked.
Becky nodded slowly, still looking at Sans's wrists.
Papyrus went off to the bathroom as Becky sat at the dining room table, unable to tear her eyes off of the skeleton across from her. You stayed close to him- he was putting on a really brave face, but he was sweating, and you knew this couldn't be easy.
"How long have you known?" she asked, finally looking at you.
"Since a couple of weeks before you guys brought Papyrus," you said, using your thumb to point to where he'd disappeared. “I anonymously called in some information about the fighting ring, and… I guess it worked.”
"Why didn't you say something sooner?"
"it ain't their fault," Sans said, stopping whatever lackluster reply you were preparing. "neither of us were, uh... ready to do this."
Becky deflated and looked down at her hands. "And you... Sans, right?"
"right."
"You really were fighting dogs?"
You winced, but Sans just nodded in reply. The lights in his sockets were hazy.
"You didn't want to fight them," Becky said, more like a sorrowful statement than a question.
"they woulda killed me if i didn't." Sans's reply was quiet, but that didn't hide the emotion. Becky visibly flinched in response.
The conversation was halted as Papyrus entered the room, hand fidgeting with the hem of his shirt as he cautiously stepped over and sat beside you, as far from Becky as he could be.
"HELLO," he said.
The woman was back to staring at the monster, shaken- the large crack in his skull- his missing arm- it took her an agonizing minute to clear her throat.
"I'm so sorry," she finally said, her voice weak and wobbly. "We... we had no idea-"
"I-IT'S OKAY, WE KNOW!" Papyrus said, nerves making his voice loud. "I KNOW WE'VE ALREADY MET, TECHNICALLY, BUT. BUT IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU."
Becky didn't reply, and you saw tears gathering in her eyes. As much as it sucked, you took that as a good sign- she clearly cared.
"he forgot, so, his name's papyrus," Sans added.
"OH, YES, I- OOPS. MY NAME IS PAPYRUS."
The woman nodded, hastily wiping the tears. "Did you know one another before... certain events?" she asked, tactfully avoiding the subject of their torture.
"WE'RE BROTHERS." Papyrus clacked his fingers on the tabletop, glancing at you, his brother, and then the stranger. "I'VE NEVER MET ANOTHER SKELETON THAT WASN'T MY BROTHER."
"...I'm glad you got to be together again, even if the circumstances couldn't be further from ideal," Becky said, smiling just a little bit. It fell. "Why did you decide to tell me?"
Sans and Papyrus both looked away.
"It isn't really great to keep doing the check-ins," you said, hopefully taking a bit of the emotional burden off of the skeletons. "I mean, pretending sucks more for them than for me, but it still kinda sucks for me."
The two monsters nodded in agreement. Becky let out a deep breath and then nodded, too.
"That makes sense. I'm really the only person at the rescue that does check-ins, so I suppose if I know..."
"We were hoping you'd cover for us, uh... sorry for not asking first, it would've been pretty hard to do that."
"No, no, I understand," she said as she waved the apology away. "I assume that means you two plan on staying here?"
"YES!" Papyrus replied, more chipper than before. "IT ISN'T LIKE WE KNOW WHERE ANY OF THE OTHER MONSTERS ARE, AND. WELL. THIS HUMAN IS A VERY GOOD FRIEND."
You stuttered out some kind of 'thank you' as Sans put his hand on your shoulder and nodded along.
"we aren't plannin' on leaving anytime soon. somebody's gotta keep this one from boxed-dinner diets and wallowing."
"Hey!" you protested, flustered, but Becky hummed in amusement.
"That's good to hear. I haven't heard anything in a long time, but if I do get information on the whereabouts of other monsters, I'll let you know."
"thanks, becky, we really appreciate this," Sans said. "sorry for usin' blue magic on ya earlier."
"Oh, it's alright," she said at once, perhaps quick to make the two feel better any way she could. That’s how you’d felt right after the bomb had dropped. "It didn't hurt."
"IF YOU HAVE MORE QUESTIONS OR WANT TO TALK, YOU CAN COME VISIT..." Papyrus looked at you as he said it. "OH, IS THAT ALRIGHT?"
"Yeah, I was gonna offer, too," you said. "I know it's a lot, and not having anybody to talk to about it probably wouldn't be great."
Becky nodded. Though the atmosphere had brightened considerably, the short remainder of the visit was filled with sad glances at the skeletons. The woman looked like she wanted to apologize, which she tried to do again, but Sans and Papyrus told her it wasn't necessary. You understood the urge, though.
"Please call me if you need anything," she offered as she slung her bag around her and held out a hand.
"We will, thank you. Seriously." You shook it, and then she held it out to Sans. His smile grew strained, but he didn't hesitate to shake it.
When it was Papyrus's turn, though, it took the skeleton a second to step forward. Becky's eyes went soft and she looked ready to withdraw the offer when Papyrus extended his trembling hand and gave the human a quick, brief shake before stepping back again to leave Becky looking hollow. Maybe that's what you looked like when it became obvious how scared they both were and how they had every right to be.
Things had gone well despite the tension. You really hoped Becky didn't tell anybody, but she didn't seem like she was going to. You hoped that intuition was correct.
The three of you ate ice cream and unwound on the couch for the rest of the afternoon and well into the evening.
Pages Navigation
Vanny_dont_like_eggplants on Chapter 1 Sun 22 May 2022 11:40PM UTC
Comment Actions
Anjel_X on Chapter 1 Mon 23 May 2022 01:11AM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 1 Tue 24 May 2022 03:50PM UTC
Comment Actions
DragonPanther888 on Chapter 1 Mon 23 May 2022 01:25AM UTC
Comment Actions
KattraBlake on Chapter 1 Mon 23 May 2022 09:31AM UTC
Comment Actions
thelibrarbian on Chapter 1 Mon 23 May 2022 11:04AM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 1 Tue 24 May 2022 03:38PM UTC
Comment Actions
ShibuyaNeko on Chapter 1 Wed 15 Jun 2022 04:57PM UTC
Comment Actions
Galleon_for_a_Scallion on Chapter 1 Mon 23 May 2022 11:37PM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 1 Tue 24 May 2022 03:37PM UTC
Comment Actions
BlastLight on Chapter 1 Thu 26 May 2022 04:47AM UTC
Comment Actions
Moondusted on Chapter 1 Sun 16 Apr 2023 02:13AM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 1 Sun 16 Apr 2023 11:44PM UTC
Comment Actions
Moondusted on Chapter 1 Mon 17 Apr 2023 12:17AM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 1 Tue 18 Apr 2023 09:38PM UTC
Comment Actions
Moondusted on Chapter 1 Tue 18 Apr 2023 10:17PM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 1 Tue 18 Apr 2023 11:51PM UTC
Comment Actions
Moondusted on Chapter 1 Wed 19 Apr 2023 12:01AM UTC
Comment Actions
PhoenixDaNeko on Chapter 1 Wed 26 Jul 2023 10:46PM UTC
Comment Actions
Jerrys_Acolyte on Chapter 2 Sat 28 May 2022 03:33PM UTC
Comment Actions
Säbby (Guest) on Chapter 2 Sat 28 May 2022 04:43PM UTC
Comment Actions
Anjel_X on Chapter 2 Sat 28 May 2022 05:14PM UTC
Last Edited Sat 28 May 2022 05:14PM UTC
Comment Actions
Account Deleted on Chapter 2 Sat 28 May 2022 07:25PM UTC
Comment Actions
Scarletviolet29 on Chapter 2 Sun 29 May 2022 01:41PM UTC
Comment Actions
DragonPanther888 on Chapter 2 Sun 29 May 2022 07:01PM UTC
Comment Actions
PhoenixDaNeko on Chapter 2 Wed 26 Jul 2023 10:52PM UTC
Comment Actions
HistoricallyDragon on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 06:51PM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 07:02PM UTC
Comment Actions
Deharu_Timeheart on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 06:52PM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 07:06PM UTC
Comment Actions
washi on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 07:01PM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 07:09PM UTC
Comment Actions
Account Deleted on Chapter 3 Mon 06 Jun 2022 07:06PM UTC
Comment Actions
Spectascopes on Chapter 3 Thu 09 Jun 2022 08:36PM UTC
Comment Actions
Account Deleted on Chapter 3 Sun 12 Jun 2022 08:20PM UTC
Comment Actions
Pages Navigation