Archive of Our Own ^beta

Robin has a messed up conception of love. She knows the definition, of course (deep affection for something, someone). But she doesn’t know exactly what it means to love - or rather - to be loved .  

(Robin blames the fucked up ideas of love on her mom. But her mommy issues are a topic for another time.)

There’s a rhythm that Robin and the others fall into each day after defeating Vecna. It’s hard to be apart from the others - especially Steve and Nancy - when you are constantly worrying if they’re still alive. So Robin takes up art.

She’s not the best artist, by any means, but she likes to be able to feel something. The sound of the brush hitting the canvas and the look of paint streaking the paper are all a familiar comfort that puts her mind at ease, if not for a little while. She can’t always have Steve at the tips of her fingers, so painting is a fine alternative. 

There’s a robin taking up what used to be a blank canvas. It looks like it’s singing, and that makes (human) Robin feel a little happy. It’s funny, she thinks, that the first thing her mind can think of is her namesake. 

“Robin! I didn’t know you were an artist,” Steve says. Robin jumps up in shock.  Robin doesn’t know how her door got unlocked, but there she sat. He barged into her room, completely uncalled for, but Robin  - quite frankly - doesn’t mind. 

“And I didn’t know you came into my house without warning.”

“Relax, Robin. I think it’s good.’’ 

Shocking. She supposed there was a first for everything. 

The next time Robin paints, it is a portrait of two girls (girls who look oddly like Nancy and Robin. Maybe it’s not that odd at all). The two girls are sitting next to each other, smiling and holding hands. There’s something sweet in their smiles and she can’t help but envy the Robin in the picture. Vecna took away a lot of them, but they were still fragments of the girls in the painting. Nancy smiles like that when Robin rambles like an idiot - which she does lots of. 

The smiles made them look in love . There that word was again. A four letter demon of a word that Robin still couldn't quite understand. 

The term love is weird. Maybe a better term was adoration. She liked that. Robin had adoration for Nancy because of all she went through and how strong she is. If it weren’t for Vecna, maybe they wouldn’t be where they are. Maybe there was a silver lining. 

(Robin definitely feels more than adoration for Nancy. She’d never admit it, of course (although the way she looks at Nancy is probably a dead giveaway. Robin should probably work on that). 

It’s another slow day at Family Video - it usually is. Steve and Robin are taking turns talking and occasionally glancing towards the door just in case someone decides to frantically burst in. The air around them is humid and too sticky for Robin to handle, but at least they’re in a somewhat air-conditioned building. It doesn’t help that much. 

Robin’s mind is turning with questions, particularly one question. She takes her gaze from the door and looks over at Steve. 

“Hey, Steve?” Robin asks him. 

He looks over at her and says, “Yes?”

“How did it feel to date Nancy?” It’s another dead giveaway, another hey! I’m a raging homosexual who can’t control her emotions! Watch out. 

Steve chuckles, a soft one he saves for Robin. 

“She was prissy when we dated, but I guess I liked that. There was definitely something differ- Wait a second. Do you like Nance?” he practically screams.

Robin wants to pass out, or wants something to distract his inattentive mind. But it’s just them, and the sticky Family Video. 

“Pfft, why would I ever have a crush on that stuck up-”

“You totally are in love with Nance! I should’ve seen this coming.”

“Oh look! Another customer! See you in a second, Harrington.”

“What customer?”  

Robin stations herself toward the rom-com section of the room. It’s a quiet section that doesn’t get as much love as it should. Robin would never admit it, but she loves this section, and the movies that come along with it. 

It’s a while before she notices Nancy walking into the store. She’s wearing a sweater and jeans, something completely put together and utterly Nancy Wheeler. Robin quickly smooths down her pants and finger brushes her hair. 

What in the world is Wheeler doing here?

She watches Steve and Nancy exchange a few words as he points her to where Robin is sitting, pretending to shelf different movies. Nancy walks over to where Robin is, and Robin hopes she looks at least half-decent.

“Oh! Hi Nancy. I was just putting these away and I didn’t know you were going to be here, but if I knew you were I would’ve totally waited up by the counter with Steve.” Great. She’s rambling again. 

“Hi Robin. I brought you lunch, because I know you forget to eat sometimes.” Nancy hands her a brown paper bag, and inside holds a sandwich. Robin can do with a sandwich. 

“Thank you so so much, Nancy. 

It’s a dead beat of silence before a question - a completely outrageous one at that - pops into her head. 

“Would you like to get dinner later?” she asks. Robin, quite frankly, doesn’t know where that surge of confidence came from. She also doesn’t know where the question came from. There are a lot of things she doesn’t know. 

“Actually, Robin, I would love to,” she replies. There’s a wide grin on Nancy’s face, and probably a matching one on Robin’s.  In fact, it’s probably ten times bigger. 

Robin is painting a portrait of Steve, Nancy, Eddie, and herself when the thought hits her. What she feels for Steve, what she feels for Nancy, the others, is love . It’s an overwhelming sense of joy and fondness that overcomes her when she thinks of them. 

It’s a sense of hey, I’m always going to be here, and my support and devotion is completely unconditional . She has a home, a home with all of them that she knows will always be safe. And that’s love . 

So maybe her mother didn’t teach her how to love, but Robin is sure she’s learned through her new found family. Robin just hopes she’s loving right.