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Chapter Text

Mulch and dirt flies up from the ground and screams and laughter fill the air. The sky is a clear, bright blue, accompanying the unusual warmth for early autumn in England. A pair of seagulls fly past overhead, cawing loud over the rest of the noise of the playground.

Charlie Spring stands at the edge, leaning his arms against the metal fence. His curls are ruffled slightly in the wind as he watches the various children running around the playground. He has a soft, peaceful smile on his face, tapping one of his fingers rhythmically against the metal. Due to the unusual heat, he has left his suit jacket in the car, a pair of sunglasses perched on the end of his nose.

Meanwhile, Maya Spring dashes up the jungle gym, laughing as her other friends follow after her. Moments later, she appears at the bottom of the big tube slide, her skirt riding up slightly as she clambers clumsily off the bottom. She pays no attention to the curly haired man watching her from afar, caught up in playing and entertaining her friends.

Charlie never understood how she came out as such a social, chatty child. He himself had always been naturally shy and quiet, mostly keeping to himself out of protection. But Maya came out practically already talking to all the nurses, all wide eyes and loud as anything. From the day he dropped her off at day care for the first time, sobbing profusely as he waved goodbye, she made fast friends with just about everyone that knew her and any of Charlie’s fears that she would grow up to be as lonely and awkward as he did were promptly squashed as soon as he picked her up from day care the first day.

Charlie glances down at his watch, pulling back his sleeve.

“Maya, sweetheart, let's go!" he calls.

Maya, swinging to and fro on the monkey bars, freezes midair and looks towards her father. Even from here, Charlie recognises the heavy, dramatic sigh as she lets go and lands several feet below.

Charlie jumps. He really hates it when she does that.

Maya sprints over to where her purple backpack has been discarded along with the other kids' and throws it carelessly over her shoulders before running towards the exit gate.

She keeps running until she leaps right into Charlie's arms, almost knocking him over. He wheezes as he catches her, stepping back slightly.

“Hello, darling," he says, bending down to lift her and prop her up on his hip. She’s probably getting a bit too big for this by now, being 6 years old already, but Charlie would be damned if he gave up now.

“Hiya, Daddy!" Maya exclaims, almost choking him as she wraps her arms tight around his neck.

Charlie laughs, adjusting her grip so he can breathe easier. He glances back over to the playground, eyes locking onto the new teacher assigned to Maya's class that year.

Mr. Nelson is a tall, very broad shouldered man with light hair and a constant grin on his face, as far as Charlie can tell. Right now, he has a pair of sunglasses on, the sleeves of his button down rolled up, a grey blazer forgotten in the mulch.

According to Maya, he likes making up games to teach kids difficult concepts and cracks jokes that almost none of the class ever understands and he's incredibly patient with each and every one of them. She likes him much better than her last teacher, a shockingly strict teacher for year 1, Mr. West, so Charlie supposes he must be a good teacher.

He's certainly a looker, that's for sure.

~~~

For the next few weeks, the only glimpses Charlie ever receives of the famous Mr. Nelson are in the playground when he drops off and picks up Maya from school. One day, when Charlie comes to pick Maya up, he immediately spots Mr. Nelson among the students, towering over them as he jogs around the playground, joining them in a game of football.

He has discarded his usual blazer and his tie is loose as he passes the ball gently to the 6 year olds crowding around him in their school uniforms, yelling his name in delight. Among them is Maya, her cardigan wrapped around her waist and her dark hair falling into her face as she hurries to catch the ball from her classmates and teachers.

As much as Charlie would love to stay and watch his daughter and her hot teacher, Charlie is already running late to getting to Tao and Elle's house for Friday dinner, so he has no choice but to call Maya over again.

Charlie brushes past a few other parents lingering at the sides, nodding politely, and makes his way into the playground to pick up Maya's bag for her before he calls her over. As he straightens up, he catches her eye and raises his hand in a wave.

She returns the wave without coming over.

“Maya! Maya, we’ve got to go!”

When she still ignores him, Charlie mutters to himself, shaking his head, “Fuck's sake."

“You and me both."

Charlie startles at the voice to his right. He turns to find a pretty young woman with curly brown hair, freckles over pale cheeks and the bluest eyes Charlie has ever seen.

“Which one's yours?" she asks, gesturing to the kids running around the playground.

“Erm, Maya Spring. She's the one with the messy hair over on the left," he says, pointing. “I swear her hair was neater when she left this morning."

The other woman laughs, grinning. “Oh, I know what you mean. Mine is Timothy. He's the one absolutely covered in mud," she replies.

Indeed, one of the boys chasing after the football, has a massive dark brown and green stain down his white school shirt. He has tan skin and wild curly brown hair, though Charlie recognises his mother’s smile even from here.

“Well, at least they seem to be having fun,” he remarks.

The other woman nods, still beaming. She holds out her hand to Charlie. “I’m Imogen,” she says.

“Charlie,” he replies, shaking her hand. He drops his hand again and turns back to the playground. “Maya! Come on, sweetheart, we’ve really got to go!”

“But, Daddy!” she whines back, running alongside the ball.

Imogen giggles, covering her laugh with both hands. Charlie rolls his eyes, throwing an apologetic smile over his shoulder as he starts towards the football match. He narrowly dodges the ball being kicked his way, almost dropping Maya’s bag on the ground as he strides into the middle of the ‘football field’ and over to his daughter.

Maya finally graces Charlie with her attention as he approaches her. She shrieks as he grabs her around the middle and lifts her up unceremoniously. She laughs and shouts the whole way out of the playground and Charlie shoots Imogen a polite smile before carrying her to the car.

“Daddy, we were just playing!” Maya complains as he tosses her bag into the backseat and helps her buckle her seatbelt.

“I know, sweetheart, but we’re running late to seeing Auntie Elle and Uncle Tao,” he explains.

Mercifully, Maya immediately stops complaining at the mention of her favourite ‘aunt and uncle.’

~~~

Charlie doesn’t properly meet Mr. Nelson until a few weeks later at the parent/teacher conference to discuss how Maya is getting on with school.

Charlie pulls into the car park with 10 minutes to spare before his scheduled meeting with Mr. Nelson. He pauses to inspect his appearance in the rearview mirror, taking in his messy curls and his ink-stained shirt collar and the slightly frayed edges of his brown blazer. He sighs, straightening out the fabric and yanking one of the longer threads off his jacket.

He doesn’t even know why he’s so bothered by how he looks. Mr. Nelson is probably married to some gorgeous woman and he’s Maya’s teacher for goodness sake! It would be inappropriate…

Finally, with one last glimpse at his appearance, Charlie forces himself to head into the school to meet with Maya’s stupidly handsome teacher.

Inside the halls of Lewis Carroll Primary School, parents linger outside of every classroom, talking to each other as they wait to meet with the teachers. All the classrooms have been labelled with the names of the teachers, as well as a list of meeting times for all the parents from multiple year groups. Since the last time Charlie had been inside the school building, they’d painted the plain white walls with a colourful mural of a rainbow globe, surrounded by children of various races and sizes.

“Charlie!”

Charlie turns at the sound of his name and spots Imogen near the classroom door, chatting with a couple other parents. She waves him over with a smile and he awkwardly makes his way over. She has her arm around the waist of a man with a short black afro, dressed in a crisp navy blue suit. He has a friendly smile as he talks with the other parents and even gives Charlie a nod as he approaches.

“Oh, has everyone met Charlie here?” Imogen greets, peeling away from the other man to rest her elbow on Charlie’s shoulder(a real feat considering the multiple inches Charlie has on her, even in her work heels). “Charlie, this is my husband Otis.”

Charlie shakes hands with Otis, who immediately returns to wrapping an arm around Imogen’s waist. Charlie is just getting introduced to the other parents he hasn’t met yet when the door to Maya’s classroom swings open and another parent walks out of Mr. Nelson’s classroom, thanking him over their shoulder. At the back of the room, Charlie spots Mr. Nelson sitting at his desk.

“Are Maya Spring’s guardians here?” Mr. Nelson announces to the hallway in a nice, deep voice.

Charlie says his goodbyes to the other parents and heads inside, shutting the door behind him.

He glances around the room. All the desks have been set into various groups of 4 or 5, each decorated with personalised name plates on all of them, which have clearly been decorated by all the kids. A big carpet with a map of the world spreads out across the floor and various multi-coloured shelves and cubbies line one wall, also labelled with all the kids’ names. On the other side, the dry erase board has a mix of leftover maths equations, a rainbow alphabet going down the side and, in messy block letters, the date has also been written in the top right corner in blue pen. Along the windows at the back, various drawings have been stuck to the glass, including butterflies, badly done self-portraits and abstract colourful doodles. There’s also a few flags hanging up from the ceiling, including a few pride flags and the school flag, as well as a couple rugby team logos.

Charlie’s favourite part, though, is the plastic solar system hanging from the ceiling and the glow in the dark stars stuck up across the entire ceiling like the night’s sky.

It’s easily the coolest classroom Charlie has ever seen.

Charlie hadn’t realised how long he’s stood in Mr. Nelson’s classroom gaping around like an idiot, until Mr. Nelson clears his throat, snapping him back to attention. He’s still sitting behind his desk, brows pinching in confusion.

“Er, hi?” says Mr. Nelson.

Charlie shakes himself off and finally forces himself to cross the room, taking Mr. Nelson’s proffered hand. “Hi, I’m Charlie Spring, Maya’s dad,” says Charlie, shaking his hand. It’s warm and slightly rough to the touch.

“Nice to meet you, Charlie,” says Mr. Nelson. “Take a seat. Please.” He gestures to the seat across from him.

“Oh, yeah,” says Charlie, dropping into the chair across from Mr. Nelson at last. “Sorry. I just got distracted. Your classroom is wonderful.”

Mr. Nelson positively beams, sitting back in his seat. He even has a slight blush, Charlie notices.

Up close, Mr. Nelson is even more handsome than Charlie expected. He has bright, gentle brown eyes and a square jaw and his hair is somewhere between ginger and blonde, especially in the evening light coming through the classroom window behind him. His white button down is tight against his muscular biceps as his blazer has once again been ditched, hanging over the back of his chair.

Charlie is utterly screwed.

“So, are there any other guardians we’re still waiting on or is it just you?” Mr. Nelson asks, shuffling through a stack of papers in front of him.

Charlie swallows and looks down at his lap, face burning. “Erm, no, just—just me,” he responds quietly. He clears his throat and forces himself to look back at Mr. Nelson. He expects to find a pitying, apologetic look or a confused frown, but Mr. Nelson looks surprisingly unbothered as he nods in understanding.

“So, overall, Maya is doing quite well in Year 2,” Mr. Nelson begins, pulling up a paper covered in notes about Maya, covered in messy blue handwriting. He straightens it out in front of him. “She excels in reading and writing and her maths is a solid level for where she is currently. As you can see here, her marks are pretty consistently high for these subjects here, though she does fall behind a bit in the history unit and art class.”

He turns the paper around so that it faces Charlie, pointing at the marks on the page. Charlie leans over the table, scanning the paper in front of him. Indeed, everywhere but History and Art, all of Maya’s marks are pretty good.

“Is there any reason she’s not doing so well in those two specifically?” Charlie asks, glancing up at Mr. Nelson, brows furrowing and mouth pulling down.

Mr. Nelson spins the paper back around to face him. He laces his fingers together in front of him on the table and leans forward. “See, while she manages to get most of her work done in other lessons, she struggles to pay attention sometimes and can be quite the chatterbox when she wants to be. I’ve had to move her desk 4 times already due to her distracting the other kids from their own work,” he explains, frowning slightly. “I asked her recently about her history and she told me she finds it boring compared to her other subjects, so I believe she falls behind because she doesn’t try as hard in history and gets distracted much more easily as her mind wanders.”

“And what about art? That’s usually fairly easy, isn’t it?” says Charlie, frowning. “And at home I know she loves doing crafts and art projects.”

Mr. Nelson nods again. He gives Charlie a soft, understanding smile which only serves to make Charlie’s heart race even more.

“I think it might be the opposite problem,” says Mr. Nelson. “I spoke with her art teacher, Miss Allen, and she said that Maya has a bit of a habit of getting entirely off topic in her class and tends to not take the lessons very seriously. Apparently, she often decides to…” He lifts another piece of paper and reads aloud, “‘embark on entirely different art projects to what she has been assigned.’”

Charlie snorts despite himself. His eyes bulge and he slaps a hand over his mouth, horrified at his outburst. Mr. Nelson’s eyebrows shoot up, tilting his head to the side. One side of his mouth twitches like he’s holding back a smile of his own.

“Sorry,” Charlie says, cheeks burning again. “It’s just—that sounds very in character for her, actually.”

“Oh, I don’t doubt that,” says Mr. Nelson, smiling. “The other day, Miss Allen came to my classroom complaining that instead of the self-portraits they were supposed to be doing in pencil, Maya decided she would rather finger paint a very elaborate depiction of her cat, Tibby.”

“How did she even manage that?” Charlie blurts, grinning even wider. He slaps his hand on his forehead. “I never should have let her around my friends so much. She’s turning into a free spirit!”

Mr. Nelson chuckles. “She’s certainly quite the character, that’s for sure,” he agrees.

Charlie smiles, listening to Nick describing his daughter. But he still can’t ignore the comments about her history and art grades.

“So, what’ll we do about her history and art?” he asks.

“Well, as for history, I’ve been slowly trying to work with her more individually to help,” Nick explains, shuffling the papers again. “And I’m trying to make the class more interactive and engaging so that she finds more interest in it. And in regards to art, I’ve been speaking to Miss Allen and we’re trying to work out ways to keep her actually paying attention to the tasks at hand and not getting carried away with other stuff.”

Charlie hums, listening and nodding his head. He’s shocked at how much care and attention Nick has clearly put into this. It’s obvious from the way he speaks about Maya that he’s fond of her and that he intends to try to help her in any way that he can. It’s nice to know that Maya has such an attentive, helpful teacher.

“But honestly, I wouldn’t worry too much,” Nick continues. “She’s a goofball and often talks out of turn in class, but when she’s focused, she’s one of my best students and she’s always nice to everyone else no matter what. She’s a real delight to have in the class. You should be proud of the daughter you’ve raised, despite any fallbacks we’ve got currently.”

Charlie’s eyes begin to burn listening to Mr. Nelson describing his daughter so fondly. He ducks his head down to avoid showing the deep emotions Mr. Nelson’s comments have brought on. He can’t go crying in front of his daughter’s teacher, handsome or otherwise.

“Thank you for saying that,” Charlie murmurs, peeking up through his lashes at the other man. His friendly smile has turned slightly concerned now as he watches Charlie, eyes widening. “Her other dad passed away at the start of her first year of school and I’m not close with most of my family, so it’s been hard raising her mostly by myself. It’s been hard raising her without a partner, so it means a lot to be told I’m doing a good job.”

Charlie dares a peek up at the other man, blinking. While he expects at least some pity, he’s shocked to see anything but. His features have pulled into a strangely soft expression, as if he knows Charlie well and hasn’t literally just met him a few minutes ago. He isn’t pitying or sad, he’s understanding.

“I’m so sorry,” Charlie laughs self-deprecatingly, sniffling and wiping his eyes. “You must think I’m such an idiot, crying in your classroom. I’m sorry you’ve seen me like this.”

Nick shakes his head sharply, sitting up straighter in his seat. “Don’t be. I can’t imagine how hard it must have been. Believe me, I know how hard kids can be even on the best days.” Mr. Nelson chuckles, eyes downcast, as if sharing a private joke with himself. Charlie feels his heart constrict with fondness. “Trust me, these… bumps in the road with Maya are nothing when you take into consideration everything else. You’re clearly doing a wonderful job because—” He glances around before leaning forwards on the desk, a conspiratorial grin on his face. “—I know I shouldn’t have any, but she’s genuinely one of my favourite students.”

Charlie laughs a little wetly. He shares a smile with Mr. Nelson, unable to tear his eyes away.

“It’ll be our secret,” says Charlie, miming locking his lips and tossing away the invisible key. Mr. Nelson’s grin broadens.

For a moment, neither of them say anything. They sit across from each other wearing stupidly fond grins for essentially strangers, sharing a glance normally reserved for mischievous children. Charlie feels his whole body tingling with the gaze of the man across from him, abnormally attached to him despite never having spoken to him before this evening.

The comfortable silence is cut off abruptly by Mr. Nelson’s watch beeping. Charlie jumps.

Mr. Nelson’s eyes widen. “Fuck, that’s my next appointment now!” he blurts. In his panic, he swipes all his papers to the floor, scattered haphazardly across the floor and his desk. He swears, leaping to his feet. “Damn, I spent ages organising those.”

“Here, let me help.” Charlie kneels down, gently collecting the sheets of paper one by one.

Mr. Nelson kneels down beside him, helping to collect the papers and somewhat organise them as quickly as he can. Their fingers brush as they both reach out for the same sheet and Charlie’s heart skips, cheeks flushing as he jerks his hand away to let Mr. Nelson pick it up instead.

Once all the papers have been gathered and somewhat organised, Charlie passes his half over to Mr. Nelson and starts for the door. Mr. Nelson moves to follow, falling into step with him until they reach the door.

“Thank you so much for coming, Charlie,” says Mr. Nelson, stopping in front of the door. “You really are doing a good job with Maya. She’ll go far one day, I’m sure.”

“Thank you, Mr. Nelson. It means a lot,” says Charlie earnestly.

“Nick,” says Mr. Nelson.

Charlie tilts his head, eyebrows furrowing.

“That’s my name. You can—you can call me Nick, if you like.” Curiously, his cheeks turn a pale, pretty shade of pink high on his cheekbones and he rubs the back of his neck, looking bashful. It suits him.

Charlie doesn’t reply. He almost throws the door open, swallowing when he finds the other parents waiting outside(thankfully not including Imogen or her husband.). He turns back to Mr. Nelson one last time and gives him a small, shy smile.

And then he scuttles down the hallway, past the rainbow mural and back outside to his car without looking back once until he’s in his car, backing out to head to pick up Maya from the Xu house.

God, he is fucked.

Chapter Text

For the next few weeks, Charlie continues to drop off and pick up Maya without a word to her teacher. He hovers near the edge of the lot as he waits for her to come out, occasionally chatting to Imogen if she’s there to pick up her son, but otherwise keeping his distance. He goes through the motions; he makes her breakfast and drops her off on his way to work, then he comes back on his way home, waiting outside the playground for her appearance.

He sees Mr. Nelson almost every time he’s there. He’s seen him joining the students in games again, standing on the side with other teachers or chatting with parents and even seen him working on the swingset. He knows he tries to catch Charlie’s attention every time he notices him. He’s heard him call his name and he’s felt those brown eyes locked on him and he’s caught him staring at him across the lot countless times now, but Charlie refuses to let him get too close.

Nick Nelson is the sun and Charlie is just another Icarus trying desperately not to get burned in his radiance.

On the day before the half term break, Charlie finally fails at avoiding Mr. Nelson.

When he arrives to pick up Maya again, right on time, Charlie is shocked when he steps out of his car and doesn’t see her there. Usually, because she has to do the after-school programme so that he can pick her up after he finishes work at 4:30, she’ll be on the playground doing something. He’s seen her on the swings and playing catch, going on the monkey bars and playing pretend on the jungle gym. He’s even seen her working on her homework sitting on the side, messy curls getting in her face and her skirt getting dirty from the mulch at her feet.

But today, she isn’t there.

Charlie frowns, heart rate picking up. He makes his way into the playground and over to the open door leading to one of the classrooms that opens out onto the playground. He grabs her backpack, forgotten by the door, slinging it over his shoulder and attempting to ignore his mounting unease.

He knows it’s silly to worry so much about Maya when she’s safe at school and pretty hardy, but he can’t help it.

Maya was a surrogate baby. Using the sperm from her other dad and a lovely surrogate, Meredith, his baby girl was formed. Her pregnancy went pretty well, with no real scares or shocks, always healthy at all the check ups. There was no suspecting anything was wrong until a few weeks before she was due when Meredith was hospitalized due to bleeding. When they decided to induce labour, Charlie having to rush out of a meeting to get there on time, they discovered something off that they hadn’t noticed in any other scans.

Unfortunately, nobody figured that out until an hour and a half into the birth when both mother and baby started to struggle. Charlie still had nightmares about the birth even now. After 13 hours, many of which were touch and go, both Maya and her surrogate mother were finally okay and Charlie was finally able to hold his baby girl.

Needless to say, he never quite got over the protectiveness that overwhelmed him when he felt so close to losing her that fateful day.

Thankfully, this time, it was not so dramatic.

Charlie finds Maya in the classroom mere minutes later, sitting on one of the tables with her foot up on a chair and her teacher kneeling in front of her. Her blue tights are ripped at the knee and Charlie spots a bright red patch on her knee, as well as a blue plaster already on her elbow. Her blue cardigan, covered in mud, has been tossed over the back of a chair behind her.

“Oh, my, what happened here?” says Charlie, pausing in the doorway.

Mr. Nelson, halfway to dabbing Maya’s knee with a cotton pad, freezes, dropping it on the floor at the sound of Charlie’s voice. Both of them turn toward him.

“Daddy!” Maya exclaims, face lighting up in a grin. “I nearly died!” She holds up her plastered elbow and shows him her bloody knee cap as Charlie wanders over.

“Maya!” blurts Mr. Nelson, eyes going wide and eyebrows shooting up. He turns to Charlie, half frantic. “She literally just fell off the jungle gym, I swear. She was running around with some friends and she fell off and skinned her knee and elbow, but that’s all. I promise I’m not some neglectful teacher like you see on the news.”

“Don’t worry, she’s got a flair for the dramatic. One of my friends is a proper drama queen and seems to be rubbing off on her,” says Charlie, side-eyeing his daughter. He mentally takes note to speak with his friends about their influence on his daughter.

Mr. Nelson hums in agreement. “I can tell,” he murmurs.

He bends down to pick up the cotton pad and grabs another one off the table. Charlie watches as he applies rubbing alcohol to the white wool, gently dabbing at the cut on her knee while humming a One Direction song to keep Maya distracted. Next, he grabs another plaster, this one bright yellow, carefully placing it over the cut without a bother. Charlie feels oddly fixated, watching his strong hands moving with ease and familiarity, clearly having done this hundreds of times before.

“And there we go! All fixed up!”

Maya yips, leaping off the desk with a giggle. “Thanks, Mr. Nelson!” she exclaims. On her toes, she grabs her bag off Charlie’s shoulder and puts it over both shoulders. “Can we stop for ice cream on the way home, Daddy? Because I got hurt?” She’s already tugging Charlie’s hand, trying to get him to the door.

Charlie rolls his eyes and catches Mr. Nelson’s gaze. He smirks at him, shaking his head with amusement. “Maybe, sweetheart. But you’ve got to save room for your dinner, bug,” Charlie replies, stumbling as his daughter drags him out of the classroom with surprising strength for a 6 year old.

Mr. Nelson follows them both back out to the playground. Charlie starts to follow Maya to the car when he feels a hand wrapping around his upper bicep, stopping him. He turns and finds Mr. Nelson gripping his arm, a sheepish expression on his face.

“Before you go, I wanted to ask you something real quick,” says Mr. Nelson, dropping his arm. Like a complete loser, Charlie instantly misses the presence. “Unless you’re in a rush to get home?”

Charlie shakes his head. He looks to Maya, who hovers by the gate, clutching the straps of her bag. “It’s no problem at all,” says Charlie. “Maya! I’ve got to speak to Mr. Nelson for a sec. Go play, but be careful you don’t hurt yourself again!”

“Okay!”

She sprints towards where her leftover friends are swinging on the monkey bars and Charlie already regrets not covering her in bubble wrap and shoving her in the car for her safety.

But alas, he turns away from his un-bubblewrapped child and back to her alarmingly attractive teacher. For a moment, Charlie allows himself to imagine that Mr. Nelson’s question is asking him out on a date and declaring his undying love and affection for him.

“So, listen,” Mr. Nelson begins, once he has Charlie’s attention again. “Do you wanna join the Parents and Teachers Association?”

“The Parents and Teachers Association.”

“Yeah!” says Mr. Nelson. “I know it’s a bit of an odd question, but I was thinking about that stuff you said at our meeting a few weeks ago about mostly raising Maya on your own. Do you have many people to support you, since you said you’re not close with your family?”

Charlie shrugs. “I mean, I’ve got friends of course. They’ve been a massive help and a good support system,” he explains. He pauses, feeling like he has to be honest with Mr. Nelson for some reason. “But none of them have kids of their own and they all have their own lives, so I hate to ask them for much help with Maya anymore. Beyond watching her when I’m busy or something.”

“In that case, I think it’d be great for you to join the PTA.”

“But why? I’m a bit too boring and awkward for the peppy mums of the Parents and Teachers Association, aren’t I?” Charlie jokes.

“I mean, I’m not saying you’ve got to be the president or something. Just a casual member”

“Oh, so you do think I’m boring and awkward.” Charlie cocks his head, mischievous. He bats his eyes, pouting slightly.

Mr. Nelson’s eyes bulge. “Wait, no! That’s not—” he babbles, going bright red all over. He shakes his head vigorously. “I just mean that I think it might be good for you to make friends with people that understand better what it’s like to have kids this age. It has socials and you’d get to know more of the parents of Maya’s year group and everyone’s always passing around little wisdoms about raising kids or carpooling and stuff. Plus you’d be able to have a lot more insight into what’s going on behind the scenes.”

Charlie nods, furrowing his brows in thought. When he puts it like that, it sounds like a pretty good idea. Charlie does like the idea of carpooling with someone and he always wishes he had friends who had more advice about raising kids than “I dunno, Google it.”

“Plus, the teachers get involved with it as well, so I’d be there, too,” Mr. Nelson adds.

That has Charlie’s ears perking up.

“Alright, I’ll think about it,” says Charlie. He glances over to the jungle gym where Maya is shoving a dodgeball down the slide. He looks at his shoes and laughs to himself before looking up at Mr. Nelson again. “I appreciate you trying to help me. Really. Not a lot of teachers would put so much effort into helping their students’ parents this much, so thank you.”

“Don’t thank me. It’s the least I can do,” says Mr. Nelson, smiling that endearing smile of his. He reaches up and pats Charlie on the shoulder, leaving a spark in its wake. It’s gone as fast as it was there.

Charlie says goodbye to Mr. Nelson and summons Maya before heading towards the car, thinking of Mr. Nelson’s suggestion and what to make for dinner tonight.

~~~
“You’re joining the Parents and Teachers Association?” Tao deadpans the next day when Charlie gives him the news.

On the first day of the half-term long weekend, Charlie hosts Tao, Elle and Isaac for dinner. Elle and Tao came over early to help him cook, since he oftens stresses himself out with preparing big meals like this, getting overwhelmed by the sheer quantity and all the steps he has to follow in the recipes. This way, by splitting up the work between the three of them, his stress about both the food and controlling it is lessened by sharing the ‘burden.’ He still sort of hates it, though.

After dinner, Charlie deposits Maya on the couch with the tv and pours wine for all the adults sitting around the dinner table together. On their second glass, Charlie tells them his news about joining the PTA at Mr. Nelson’s suggestion, earning a variety of reactions: Elle is intrigued and confused but otherwise supportive and Isaac supports it, though he’s more focused on thumbing through a Nigela Lawson cookbook.

But Tao thinks Charlie has lost it.

“What’s wrong with joining the PTA?” asks Charlie. “Maybe Mr. Nelson’s right. I’m grateful for everything you guys do for me, but sometimes I just want someone who also knows what it’s like to have kids, you know? And who better than teachers who work daily with children and other parents?”

“I agree,” says Elle, swirling her glass. “It would be good to make some friends who also have kids.”

“Oh, come on, really?” says Tao. “You always made fun of the parents in the PTA, remember? All their uptight bake sales and aggressive fundraising? Just because your infatuation with a straight teacher at your daughter’s school says it’s a good idea, doesn’t mean it is.”

“You don’t know he’s straight,” says Charlie halfheartedly, looking down at the leftover rivulets of wine at the bottom of his glass. “And besides, I’m not going to be like those guys. There’s got to be normal parents on the PTA that just want to be involved and stuff.”

Tao rolls his eyes. He finishes the last of his wine and gives Charlie a look as he pours himself another. “Fine. Just be careful, okay? You know how those people can be.”

“I know, I know. Former popular kids and bored stay-at-home parents.”

“Exactly!” says Tao, slapping the table.

“I’ll be careful, Tao. I can take care of myself, thanks,” says Charlie, shaking his head. “And stop banging the table, would you?”
~~~

Two days later, Charlie takes Maya to the grocery store. He knows it’s not the most exciting activity for a break, but he’s been so busy with work recently, he hasn’t had time to get a proper food shop in ages. He already promised Maya in the car that he would take her to a movie later once they finish, so she thankfully hasn’t complained much.

“No, we can’t get both Choco Pops and Honey Puffs, Maya. You’ve got to pick one,” says Charlie, standing in the middle of the cereal aisle with Maya.

She stands in front of the cart, holding up the two boxes with a frown, as if it genuinely takes that much effort to decide. Her dark hair is tied back in a messy plait today, so her hair doesn’t fall into her face for once, but she still somehow has a few strands in her eyes as she deliberates over the two boxes. Charlie rolls his eyes, growing impatient as their frozen food begins to thaw.

“I can’t decide, Daddy. They’re both good!” Maya announces, tossing the boxes into the cart.

Charlie sighs and picks them up again. This is the third time she has done this in about as many minutes.

“Maya, please,” Charlie pleads. He kneels down in front of her, getting closer to her eye line. “We can get the other kind next time if you just pick one now, alright? How about that?”

She looks at the two boxes, eyes narrowing. She looks up at Charlie, who stands up again as his knees ache from bending down for so long. “But I still don’t know which one I want right now!” she exclaims, looking slightly panicked, her blue eyes wide and beginning to water.

*Shit,* Charlie thinks, panicking as well.

“Okay, what about… we flip a coin and you pick from there? That way, you don’t have to decide,” he suggests. He rifles around his jean pockets until he pulls his wallet out and opens it. He smiles at the photo of Maya as a baby tucked inside, unzipping the coin slot and pulling out a 50 pence coin.

“But which one will be which?” asks Maya, glancing at the coin. She sniffs, a single tear rolling down her cheek.

Charlie swipes the tear away and looks down at the boxes. On the front of the Honey Puffs box is a cartoon bowl of cereal, while the front of the Choco Pops has a cartoon teddy bear on it. He turns the boxes to face Maya. “Well, the Choco Pops bear has a head, so we’ll make that one heads while the Honey Puffs can be tails because there’s no head.”

“But bears have tails, too.”

Charlie sighs heavily, hanging his head. He raised a smartass.

Behind him, someone snorts. Charlie turns and jumps when he finds none other than Mr. Nelson coming towards him with a basket at his side. Instead of his normal button downs and blazers, he’s dressed in a simple Adidas t-shirt and cuffed jeans and Vans trainers. Charlie sucks in a breath at how much he suits the casual look.

“Mr. Nelson!” exclaims Maya, a grin spreading on her face once again. Cereal forgotten, she rushes over to her teacher, grinning up at him. “Hello!”

Nick grins down at her. “Hi, Maya. How are you?” he asks, putting his basket down on the floor. It’s filled with ready-made meals and some vegetables.

Charlie remarks that it hardly looks like shopping for someone in a relationship… At least not a serious one where they live together. He also notices the lack of a ring on his finger.

“I don’t know what cereal I want! I hate making choices…” she replies, frowning over her shoulder like the cereal personally affronted her.

Charlie catches Nick’s eyes and shakes his head, smiling. He responds with a smirk.

“I see. And because bears have tails and heads, you don’t know which to make heads or tails, yeah?” he says. She nods. “What about you do eenie meenie instead? You still don’t have to pick, then.”

Maya gasps. “Oh, yeah!”

Charlie holds up the boxes to Maya and she does the little game, small finger dashing back and forth between them. Her finger stops on the Honey Puffs. She drops her hands to her side.

“But now I want the Choco Pops.”

Charlie slaps his forehead and Nick laughs again.

“Well, there you go. You’ve chosen Choco Pops, then,” says Nick. “You already made your choice once you started doing the game. Easy.”

Charlie tosses the chocolate cereal into the basket and puts the other one back on the right shelf before she can change her mind again. He mouths ‘thank you’ to Nick behind Maya and the other man shrugs nonchalantly, still smiling.

As Maya heads off to the next aisle, insisting on pushing the trolley herself, Charlie and Nick walk slowly just behind her. Their shoulders brush every so often, standing so close as they walk. Charlie’s heart skips every time, like it’s trying to reach a target with its beats.

“That was actually impressive what you did there,” says Charlie, turning. “I don’t know what I would have done.”

“You seemed like you were doing pretty well without me, actually,” he replies, nudging his shoulder into Charlie’s.

“How much of that did you hear?”

“Hmm, most of it, I think. I wanted to see what you’d do.” He bumps their shoulders again. “Don’t worry. She’s notorious in my class for being crap at decision making, so that would have taken me even longer to get. I didn’t even consider flipping a coin!”

“Well, you know, it’s not always easy. She’s like me. She panics easily sometimes and even I don’t know how to deal with it sometimes,” Charlie explains. He watches Maya pulling a baking kit off one of the shelves in the next aisle and decides not to mention it this time.

“Do you panic easily?” Nick halts, tilting his head.

Charlie snorts. “Absolutely. I’m practically always having an anxiety attack,” he admits, his tone self-deprecating. “I’ve got OCD, so I’m pretty much a control freak on the outside and a complete mess on the inside.”

Nick frowns, pausing. Charlie hangs his shoulders, blushing.

“Sorry. That was probably too much to share,” Charlie mutters to his trainers.

“Please don’t apologise. We all have our issues,” says Nick, still frowning. His eyes linger on Charlie’s face, like he tries to read him through his eyes. “I’m hardly the most well-rounded adult either. I can’t even cook properly.” He holds up his basket of pre-made meals.

“It is quite sad you can’t cook.”

“Hey!” Nick exclaims, faking offence. He elbows Charlie’s side. “I do my best. I’m still not great and I’m pretty lazy most days after work, but I’m not totally useless.”

“I never said you were,” says Charlie, his eyes softening. Nick’s cheeks blush again and he looks down at the floor.

“But seriously, don’t worry. I know what it’s like to get anxious about stuff. I’m pretty shit at asking for help with stuff and so I’ll just let things worsen until I get overwhelmed,” says Nick, shrugging like he didn’t just drop another small bomb on Charlie with his honesty. “There’s nothing wrong with you, I assure you.”

Charlie opens his mouth to reply, but he gets interrupted by Maya calling for him. She’s at the other end of the aisle, wearing an impatient frown and tapping her foot. It lights up with each tap. She looks exactly like Tao whenever he grows impatient and Charlie has to bite back another laugh.

“Coming, sweetheart!” says Charlie. He turns back to Nick one last time. “Thanks again for helping me with Maya back there. Sorry you had to witness her near tantrum.”

“No problem at all, Charlie. Happy to help you both.” Nick grins, eyes soft.

Charlie spins on his heel and starts back down the aisle before his daughter can hurry off again without him. He turns over his shoulder and sees Nick standing at the other end. He raises his hand in a wave and Charlie returns it before grabbing the trolley and whisking his daughter away.

Chapter Text

On the first Friday after they return from the break, Charlie attends his first ever Parents and Teachers Association meeting.

After running into each other over the break, Charlie stops avoiding Nick at school that week, occasionally wandering over to chat or waving to him as he collects Maya. When he spots Nick watching him every time he appears, he feels his stomach tie itself in knots, making the arrival of the PTA meeting both nerve-wracking and exciting.

Charlie drops Maya off at Tao and Elle’s for the night and heads to the school again, dressed casually but nicely in jeans and a red jumper with a matching flannel over the top. He makes his way to the cafeteria where the meeting is to be held, passing more colourful murals painted on the walls and various different boards showcasing art from all the school years. All the lights in the classrooms have been turned off and most of the corridor lights are off as well, giving the building an eerie sort of vibe as he moves towards the noise coming from the cafeteria.

Charlie opens the doors to the cafeteria, cutting the silence like a hammer to glass.

The inside of the cafeteria is a complete antithesis to the quiet of the rest of the school. All the glaring fluorescent lights are on and someone has gentle music playing at a similar volume to the chatter of the parents mingling around the hall. Most of the tables are empty, though a few of them have been covered with white paper tablecloths, one of the long tables set out with a small buffet of snacks and drinks. On the back wall, another mural has been painted on the wall, depicting various coloured hands grasping with the statement “We’re all in this together” in rainbow bubble letters over the top. Mums and the occasional dads mingle in groups and Charlie recognises a few of the teachers also there, talking to each other or to a few of the parents, holding plastic cups or paper plates of food.

The first person to greet him is none other than Imogen.

She peels away from a small group of other mums and almost knocks him over in a hug, blurting out his name with glee. Charlie doesn’t have time to hug her back before she’s stepping away again, grinning up at him.

“Imogen! I didn’t know you were in the PTA,” says Charlie, blinking down at her. He still has yet to get used to her bubbly friendship.

“I’m Co-President, silly!” she exclaims, slapping his arm. “Apart from Sahar Zahid, I’m the big boss here.” She gestures behind her across the room where a short woman of South Asian descent, dressed in a simple skirt suit, talks with a couple of teachers.

“Oh.”

“Come on! I’ll introduce you to everyone!” She grabs Charlie’s hand and pulls him over to the group she ditched to greet him.

For the next few minutes, Imogen drags Charlie around the room, going from group to group, introducing him to all the members of the PTA. Everyone seems surprisingly polite and cheerful, giving genuine smiles as Imogen forces him onto them, no doubt egged on by her extroversion and constant energy that radiates off her. He recognises a handful of the parents from drop offs and pick ups, though most of them he’s never spoken to before, particularly those with kids in other year groups.

Eventually, Charlie spots Nick sidling into the room with another teacher, a tiny blonde woman wearing a very colourful outfit covered in paint. As he gets introduced to yet another group of mums, Charlie’s eyes keep drifting over to the snack table where Nick stands, raising his cup to Charlie in greeting.

Finally, when Charlie already feels his social clock ticking out after meeting so many people, Imogen relents and sets him free, excusing herself to speak to Sahar for the last few minutes before the meeting should start. She suggests he speaks to one of the groups, but Charlie instead finds himself moving over to Nick like he’s magnetised to him.

“Fancy seeing you here,” says Nick once he approaches, smiling over the brim of his cup. His plate has been loaded up with doritos, hummus and baby carrots.

“Yes, what a coincidence to find you at your place of work at the meeting you invited me to,” Charlie replies teasingly. He grabs an empty cup from the stack on the table and fills it with lemonade. Nick sticks his tongue out, both his hands full, so he can’t retaliate much more.

The blonde woman, still standing next to Nick, clears her throat, putting her hands on her hips and looking between them with a smirk. Nick’s face blooms in a blush and he quickly says, “Shit, sorry. Charlie, this is the other art teacher, Darcy Jones. Darcy, behave, this is Maya Spring’s dad, Charlie.” He gestures vaguely between them, almost spilling his drink. This earns another side-glance from his fellow teacher.

“Nice to meet you!” she exclaims brightly, grabbing Charlie’s hand and shaking it up and down. “I love meeting fellow gay people.”

“Darcy!” Nick blurts, eyes going wide. Charlie chokes on his glass of lemonade.

“Sorry, sorry. Just my gay intuition working overtime,” she teases, poking Nick in the ribs. “Anyway, I’m gonna go irritate Mr. McBride. Nice to finally meet you, Charlie!” And with more energy than a child, Darcy jogs away, leaving Charlie and Nick alone.

“Sorry about her. She’s a bit out there,” says Nick after a brief, comfortable silence. Charlie shrugs nonchalantly. “I’m glad you came, anyway.”

“You are?”

Nick nods. “Of course.”

Charlie feels his face burn and he quickly covers it up by taking a long gulp of his drink. Nick watches him with a smirk lingering on his face which only serves to make it even worse for Charlie. If Nick keeps looking at him like that, he's in serious danger of choking or spilling his drink all over himself.

“I see Imogen introduced you to some people,” Nick adds.

“More like introduced me to literally everybody.” Charlie shivers, pretending to gag into his drink.

Nick snorts, popping a couple crisps in his mouth. “You not gonna get any food?” he asks once he swallows.

Charlie shakes his head, ruffling his hair awkwardly. “No thanks. I’m not much of a snacker, really. And I’ve got leftovers at home for when I get back,” he replies honestly. He eyes the plate and dares to grab one of the baby carrots on Nick’s plate, dipping it in the hummus before taking a bite through a grin. “Although, I don’t mind a bit…”

“My carrot!”

“You’ll survive, carrot top,” Charlie retorts, popping the last bit in his mouth, smiling as he chews. Nick’s jaw drops open.

“Oh God, that reminds me of my dog, Nellie. She absolutely loves carrots for some reason and is always stealing them off my plate,” says Nick. He sets his plate and cup on the table and reaches into his back pocket, pulling out his phone. Unlocking it, he pulls up the camera app and scrolls for a few seconds before passing over the phone to Charlie. “See? That’s her.”

Charlie zooms in on the picture, curls falling into his eyes as he grins at the picture. It’s a photograph of a beautiful Border Collie sitting in a bright green field, tongue sticking out as she looks at the camera with her big brown eyes. Though she looks like an older dog, her fur more white around her face than a younger dog, she still looks absolutely precious.

“Oh, she’s adorable! I want to steal her,” says Charlie, passing the phone back. Their fingers brush and Charlie swears he feels electricity.

“Please don’t. She’s almost 11,” says Nick, eyes crinkling shut with his grin as he tucks his phone away. “You should meet her sometime,” Nick adds, taking a sip from his drink and eyeing Charlie over the rim of his cup.

“Yeah, maybe I will,” says Charlie, smiling into his own cup.

Their conversation is cut off a moment later by Imogen calling everyone over to the long table without any food on it. Charlie and Nick join the others at the table, sitting next to each other as Sahar and Imogen launch into the objectives of the meeting.

“Hello everybody,” Sahar begins, silencing the table. “For those of you that are new here, I am Sahar Zahid, one of the co-Presidents of the PTA. I teach year 3 here.” She glances at Imogen next to her.

“And I’m Imogen Smith-Heaney, the other Co-President,” she explains brightly, earning a few polite nods. “I have a son, Timothy, in year 2 here.”

“So, now that we’ve introduced ourselves,” says Sahar, “let us move onto the important stuff.”

Apparently, they have to plan for the upcoming winter fundraiser in December, which takes place the last Thursday of the term before the kids get let off for the holiday. Charlie went to it last year and vividly remembers how organised it was with all the tables of baking or crafts showcased for the school fundraiser with immaculate decorations. He even managed to get a few gifts for Christmas there.

“Now, I think we need to focus more on the winter aspect this year than the holiday aspect,” Sahar says to a mixture of nods and a few frowns from some of the more conservative parents. “We have an increasingly more diverse school and it needs to be inclusive for all the children and not just the ones who celebrate Christmas. So, Imogen and I were thinking it would be themed as a sort of winter festival instead of Santa’s grotto, like we did last year.”

“But what’s wrong with celebrating Christmas?” interrupts one of the mums. Charlie thinks she might be called Becky, but he can’t remember. It’s probably something obnoxious like that.

“Well, nothing,” says Imogen, smiling politely. “But not everyone celebrates it, remember? Some kids felt left out last year, so we want to avoid that this year.”

“But most people celebrate Christmas,” probably-Becky continues. “You can’t just ignore the biggest holiday just because a handful of kids might feel ‘left out.’” She puts air quotes around it, rolling her eyes. Charlie already hates her.

“This is a primary school, Brianna,” says Sahar, frowning (So close, Charlie thinks). “What kind of school would we be if we knowingly excluded students just because people like you want to?”

“No, Brianna’s right, Sahara,” says another mum, this one named Lili. “Maybe we can have a table dedicated to the other cultures that aren’t Christmas so they have their own table without taking away from all the other kids. It’s not fair to exclude them just because they celebrate Christmas.”

“But we’re not excluding them if we’re just including everyone,” snaps Sahar. “And you know my name is Sahar and not Sahara, Lili. I’ve been teaching here for 4 years.”

Lili rolls her eyes, but stays quiet.

“I personally think it’s a great idea,” butts in Nick. All the heads turn towards him, including Charlie. “For one thing, the fundraiser is on the 19th of December, not the 25th, so it wouldn’t even be held on Christmas in the first place. Also, I’m pretty sure it would be Hanukkah actually during that week so it would just be ignoring our Jewish students who would literally be in the middle of celebrating. If we just make the fundraiser about celebrating the end of the term and enjoying the winter break, nobody gets left out. You can see Christmas decorations and parties any other time, anyway.”

“Thank you, Mr. Nelson,” says Imogen, grinning. Charlie glances at Nick out of the corner of his eyes and is surprised to find a slight blush on his face. She turns to the table at large. “Now, I know I’m not perfect at getting everything right about cultures, but I’m sure that it’s not fun when you have a holiday you don’t even celebrate, getting shoved in your face every year. This way, we can avoid that even if it's just at school.”

“What about instead of ignoring all the holidays, we have a mixture of all of the winter holidays?” adds another parent, Sai. He’s one of the few dads here, still dressed in a business suit with his glasses perched on the end of his nose. “We can have stuff for Hanukkah and Kwanzaa as well as Christmas, but still focus on the overall winter theme. Plus, it can be educational for the kids who won’t know about the other holidays as well as including everyone.”

“I think that’s a good idea,” says Mr. McBride, the teacher that arrived with Nick. “It would be nice to teach the kids about other cultures and stuff.”

“I already have a unit about winter holidays for my Year 2s every year, so we can incorporate that more for everyone else,” adds Nick. Most people nod their head and murmur their agreement, even a few of the parents who were initially skeptical.

“But I still don’t get why we have to focus on those other holidays when so few kids celebrate them,” Brianna continues. "I can’t even say ‘Happy Christmas’ to people without getting shot down these days!” She huffs and folds her arms on her chest. “It’s people like you, Mr. Nelson, who put it into our kids’ heads that if they don’t include every tiny little minority, they’re horrible people. First you insisted on those silly ‘inclusive’ murals around the school and now you want to ban Christmas from the school!”

Charlie doesn’t know what makes him do it. He’s never one to speak out against people he disagrees with, preferring to keep his discomfort to himself and then later complaining to his few friends later on. He isn’t even one for public speaking and was never one for raising his hand to answer questions in school. But something about this woman’s harsh tones and the way she retorts at Nick specifically makes his blood positively boil. He throws any sense of being civil and keeping quiet as soon as she turns against Nick Nelson of all people.

“Hey, nobody is doing that,” cuts in Charlie. Everyone’s heads turn to him, surprised. “There’s nothing wrong with teaching kids about other cultures because otherwise people like you continue to get your way. You’re not oppressed for celebrating the biggest holiday in the country just because a few people are tired of not getting included or considered. Nick and Sai are right. We should include all the different cultures for the fundraiser. Christmas is still the most celebrated holiday of the season, so to include other holidays for a bloody primary school fundraiser is hardly going to make that much of a difference for you. But what it can do is show the other kids that not only are their cultures perfectly valid and able to be celebrated, but also shows the kids that other cultures should be welcome even if they’re not the majority. Nobody’s stopping you from celebrating your holidays, but maybe someone should stop you from butting your head in everyone else’s business.”

The table is silent after Charlie’s mild outburst. Not even Brianna has anything to say, opening and closing her mouth like a puppet without its voice. Nick and Darcy both look absolutely ecstatic at Charlie’s speech and Sahar and Imogen throw him a grateful smile. A few of the parents give him encouraging smiles as well, making Charlie’s heart race with the attention. If young Charlie could see himself now, sitting in a cafeteria with everyone looking at him, most of them giving him positive encouragement, he’d never believe his eyes.

The meeting soon moves onto discussing an apparent issue with recent school meals and no more arguments or outbursts occur. Brianna and Lili stay silent for the rest of the meeting, glaring at Charlie and Nick, as well as the two leaders of the PTA. Charlie zones out for most of it, still playing his speech over and over in his mind instead.

He’s a bit proud of himself, actually. If a bit embarrassed.

When the meeting finally finishes, everyone gets up from the table again, though everyone seems happy to mingle with each other for a few minutes before they leave. While Charlie planned to make a swift getaway, before he can get out, multiple parents and teachers come up to him to congratulate him on his little outburst.

At last, after ten minutes of talking to people, Charlie finally peels himself away from Sahar, Darcy and Sai with the excuse of picking his daughter up and he makes his way to the doors. Footsteps come up behind him and Nick falls into step with him, holding the door open for him and walking with him through the dimly lit hallway in silence.

“You did well earlier,” Nick says after a moment of walking. He reaches up and squeezes Charlie’s cheek, grinning. Charlie laughs and Nick lets go, continuing walking.

“What? Publicly lashing out at a woman at my first ever PTA meeting?”

“No, standing up for what you believe in. That’s the whole point of the PTA,” says Nick. “It’s so that the parents and teachers can work together to help make the school a positive environment for the kids by working out issues and organising fun events. It’s not just for people like Brianna and Lili to force their opinions on everyone and refuse to compromise.”

Charlie shrugs, turning the corner with a frown. “I guess not. I’m just a little embarrassed for how I reacted. I don’t normally do stuff like that,” he explains. “I’m pretty quiet and keep to myself most of the time.”

“Really? I didn’t notice,” Nick remarks, sarcastic. Charlie elbows him in the side, but his lips curl up at the corners despite this. “But seriously, you were great. You got your point across and you had the whole table silent because of it. Even Brianna kept her mouth shut and she’s been a thorn in the PTA’s side for years! It took me a whole school year and a half to get permission to put up these murals because of her.” He gestures around them at the walls painted with the different murals on the white stone.

“I didn’t know that. That’s pretty amazing,” Charlie marvels, smiling up at Nick. Nick shrugs a shoulder, humble under his compliments. "You know, I guess I was a little proud of myself for standing up to her like that. Younger me wouldn't have dared."

They leave the building at last and both walk through the car park together. Apparently, they parked their cars right across from each other. They pause by Nick’s car, a Fiat, facing each other under the buzzing light of the lamppost overhead.

“You really think I was great back there?” says Charlie, his voice quiet in the peace of the late evening.

“You were brilliant, Charlie.” Even in the dim, orange glow, Charlie can see the genuine, palpable affection in Nick’s dark eyes, his smile so soft and gentle it feels like it caresses Charlie’s very being. He feels glued to the spot under Nick’s gaze, unable to step back and unable to articulate himself when he’s getting complimented so fiercely. They stand so close their toes are touching and Charlie can make out the freckles dotting over the bridge of Nick’s nose, a pathetic part of him wanting to count them or map them out like the stars.

Charlie forces himself to take a step back, breaking the tension between them.

“I really should get back home,” says Charlie, barely above a whisper, a lump caught up in his throat. “I have to pick up Maya from my friends’ house so I can put her to bed, so.” He points his thumb over his shoulder.

Nick blinks and shakes himself vigorously, like he steps out of a trance. “Yeah, yeah, right. I’ll, uhh, leave you alone. Get home safe.” He steps backwards towards his car, bumping into it with a huff of air. His cheeks are a bright pink in the warm glow overhead and Charlie can’t help himself.

Fuck it, Charlie thinks. He moves over to Nick, stands on his toes and pecks his cheek. “I’ll see you Monday,” he murmurs, stepping back.

Nick says nothing as Charlie gets in his car and drives away into the dark, still leaning against his car.

Chapter Text

“You are an absolute goner, Charlie,” Elle says on Sunday when the gang all goes to Isaac’s house for dinner and he tells them about the PTA meeting and everything with Nick.

“Don’t remind me,” Charlie mutters, forehead on the table. He rolls his head until his cheek rests on the table, peering up at Tao in the seat next to him. He’s wearing his classic ‘I told you so’ face. “But I can’t help it. He’s so kind and funny and sweet and he listens to me and he’s perfect! He’s… Nick.”

“But you don’t even know if he’s interested or even single, Charlie,” Tao points out, poking him with his spoon. Charlie slaps his hand away, the metal cold on his skin from the ice cream he ate it with. “Or into men.”

Elle taps her fingers on the table. “You never know. He sounds pretty queer to me,” she says, scooping up more strawberry ice cream from her bowl.

“Really, Elle? Don’t encourage him!” Tao whines, pouting at his wife.

“I’m just saying! Most teachers don’t spend that long talking to the parents of their students and try to chat them up any chance they get or get flustered when they’re around,” says Elle pointedly. “Nor do they spend over a year trying to get ‘inclusivity’ murals put up around the school.”

Charlie rests his elbows on the table and cups his face with his hands, pouting. “He does not ‘chat me up’, Elle. He just says hello to me or asks me how I’m doing.”

“Does he do that with any other parents?”

Charlie pauses, thinking back. He hasn’t really noticed him giving any other parents quite as much attention, admittedly. “I mean, not as much, but I definitely see him talking to other parents. Especially those on the PTA.”

“Exactly,” says Elle, pointing at him with her half-licked spoon. “He prefers your company over all the other parents because he’s into you.”

“You’ve got to admit, she has a point,” adds Isaac with a knowing smile.

“Yeah, exactly,” says Elle. “I think you’ve at least got a chance. I mean, you said he didn’t have a wedding ring and he was shopping for one person when you ran into him at the shops.”

Tao raises his hands in the air. “Come on, guys! Don’t go putting these ideas in Charlie’s head!” Tao chastises. “What if we’re wrong and Charlie gets hurt?”

“I’m nearly 30, Tao. I can take care of myself, thanks,” Charlie points out.

“Fine. Isaac, what do you think?” Tao asks Isaac, sitting across from him without a book for once.

Isaac shrugs. “I could see either,” he says. “I’d like to think Charlie has a chance, but unless I actually see them together, I can’t be sure.” He shrugs again and takes a spoonful of ice cream. “But it definitely sounds like Nick might like him.”

“Unbelievable!” Tao pushes his empty bowl away from him and gets up, disappearing into the living room. A moment later, Charlie hears him and Maya chatting in the living room.

An hour later, everyone heads off for their own houses. They wave goodbye to Isaac at his front door and head for their respective cars, talking about one of Tao’s colleagues that pissed him off. Charlie carries Maya to the car, fast asleep after her movie, propped up on his hip with her sleepy noises ruffling his curls.

Charlie, Elle and Tao pause at the Xu-Argent’s car. Tao hops behind the wheel and shuts the door and Elle follows Charlie over to his car, helping him put Maya in her carseat. Though she stirs slightly as Charlie buckles her seatbelt, she stays asleep, curled up with her hair in her face as always.

They linger by the car for a moment. Elle reaches out and takes Charlie’s hand in her own. It’s warm and soft, smelling of her fruity moisturiser as always. “Don’t listen to Tao, Charlie. You know he’s just being protective about Mr. Nelson,” she says, lips curling up on one side. “He just worries about you.”

“I know. But he could be right. I shouldn’t get my hopes up, too much,” says Charlie, frowning at the curb.

“Maybe, but you deserve some happiness,” says Elle, squeezing. “This is the first person to catch your eye since, well, you know. It’s natural to be scared.”

“That’s precisely why I should listen to him,” says Charlie grimly. “It’ll just hurt more if I’m wrong. Is it even worth the risk? You know how much of a mess I was. It’s only been a year and I’m already crushing on my daughter’s teacher.”

Elle places her other hand on his shoulder, tilting her head to the side. Her hair is tied back from her face in a slick bun, edges laid flat so that not a strand falls in her face. “Nobody is saying you have to jump him right now, Charlie. You can take your time. I’m sure Nick would understand that,” she says. “I’m just saying that there’s nothing wrong with moving on. It’s like Geoff said. If it makes you happy, being with Nick, that’s all that matters. You shouldn’t let your fears guide you.”

Elle pulls him into a hug and then they part ways, waving to each other from their cars. Charlie waits for Elle and Tao to drive away, waving from behind the wheel, before pulling away from Isaac’s house and making the drive home in silence. His only company is the soft snores of Maya in the backseat and cars driving past.

~~~

To Charlie’s surprise, Nick doesn’t avoid him on Monday following their weird moment after the PTA meeting on Friday. When he comes to pick Maya (and Timothy, since he started carpooling with Imogen) up, Nick greets him at the fence. He grins broadly while holding a frisbee under his arm and asking how his weekend was like he always does, as if nothing has changed. Over the next couple weeks, he continues to speak to Charlie like always, sitting with him at their PTA meetings and joining his conversations with other parents on the playground.

Charlie crushes harder and harder for Nick after every one of their interactions, even the most innocuous. Sometimes, their conversations border on flirtation and he mentally slaps himself as soon as he gets in the car, while others are the most basic small talk and still leave Charlie a flustered mess when he drives Maya and Timothy home.

He knows he should keep their distance, but he can’t help it. He is permanently stuck in Nick Nelson’s orbit, a pathetic planet circling him and feeding on his gravitational pull.

On the first day of December, Charlie is very very late picking up Maya from school. He got caught up at work due to a massive system crash that deleted many authors’ works and edits and it took hours to get any of it backed up again. By the time Charlie managed to retrieve his own edits on a 1000 page manuscript he was already behind on editing, it was already almost 6pm and he still had to get to Maya’s school to collect her. To make matters worse, due to an ice storm a few days previously, the traffic was backed up for miles upon miles, only worsened by a collision between two cars that cut off an entire two lanes of the motorway. He tried calling his friends to pick Maya up for him, but with Elle and Tao on holiday and Isaac on a business trip in Paris, he was still screwed. Normally, now that they’ve started carpooling, Imogen would be able to pick Maya up with Timothy, but since he was staying home with the flu, not even she could help. By the time he is nearing the school, Charlie is a wreck, his blazer tossed into the backseat, his hair sticking all over the place and his eyes burning with tears of frustration and guilt.

He doesn’t manage to pull into the car park outside Truham-Higgs Primary until after almost 7:30 at night. The sky is almost black with night and there are no other cars in the regular car park as he pulls in. Most of the lights in the building are turned off, but for a couple at the front, stark against the inky sky. He unbuckles his seatbelt and throws his door open, almost hitting the curb as he jumps out and takes off towards the school, locking the car behind him.

Charlie burst into the building, looking around with his chest heaving. He walks past all the darkened classrooms, biting his lip, tears beginning to creep down his face.

At last, he spots a light on in Nick’s classroom.

Nick and Maya sit inside the classroom, bent over a piece of paper at one of the desks. Nick mutters quietly to Maya, who writes something quickly, nodding along, looking unbothered.

When Charlie opens the door and steps inside to see them together, he actually releases a sob of relief.

“Charlie!” Nick exclaims, turning at the sound of the door and Charlie’s pathetic sob. His eyes land on Charlie’s face and his smile falls from his face like a stack of cards toppling to the floor. “Oh, my God, Charlie! What the f—Franklin happened?”

He jumps up from the tiny primary school seat so fast it topples and he crosses the room to Charlie in barely any steps, only stopping once their feet are touching fully. Maya, curious at the situation, gets up as well, watching them from the table as she analyses the situation.

“What happened? You weren’t in an accident, were you?” Nick asks, grabbing his face in both hands, searching his face for any damage. He swipes at Charlie’s tears with the pads of his thumbs, eyes full of worry. He doesn’t even seem to mind that Maya is watching. “What’s wrong, Charlie?” His eyes are wide with worry, moving up and down Charlie’s body, looking for any damage.

“Daddy! Where were you?” Maya pushes her way between them, hugging Charlie around the middle. Nick barely moves away to give her space, still cupping Charlie’s cheeks like he doesn’t mind Maya’s intrusion.

Charlie glances down at his daughter, looking up at him with her chin resting on his torso, eyes wide. She definitely notices the tears. “I’m so sorry, bug. There was a huge computer problem at work and they wouldn’t let me leave until almost 6 and then there was a bunch of traffic because two of the lanes were closed because of the ice,” he explains to both of them.

Nick lets go of Charlie’s face and steps back, still frowning. “That sounds like a nightmare,” he says, shaking his head.

“But why were you crying, Daddy?” asks Maya, still hugging him.

Charlie bends down in front of his daughter, holding onto her shoulders. “Sometimes Daddy just gets a bit overwhelmed, bug. I was stressed about leaving you here for so long and worrying you,” he explains slowly, carefully.

He never sugarcoats for Maya or keeps her entirely in the dark. Of course, she doesn’t know most of the darker details of his mental health issues, but she has a basic understanding that he gets stressed easily about stuff and has seen him struggling with his days countless times both before and after her other father died. Especially since going to family therapy, she has a keen sense of emotions, especially for her young age.

“I’m sorry for being so late.” He glances up at Nick, who’s watching their interaction, lower lip caught between his teeth.

“It’s okay, Daddy,” says Maya, wiping his tears just like Nick did moments ago. “Mr. Nelson stayed here with me and helped me with my homework. He was telling me about St. Lunch’s Day when you arrived!”

“St. Lucia’s Day,” Nick corrects.

Charlie glances up at Nick, still kneeling in front of his daughter. “Did he, now?” says Charlie, looking in Nick’s direction instead of his daughter.

“I figured we might as well make use of the time while we waited for you to get here,” says Nick, shrugging, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his brown trousers. “It was no trouble at all, honestly.”

Charlie stands up again, knees cracking. “Thank you so much, though,” he says. He turns back to Maya, who watches them both curiously. “Maya, why don’t you go pack up your stuff and we can go. We can even stop at McDonald’s on the way since it’s so late.”

Maya grins and runs over to her desk to pack up. At the same time, both Charlie and Nick call, “No running!” They turn to each other and share a grin, cracking up.

“I’m really sorry again about being late,” Charlie murmurs as Maya packs up her things. “I’m sorry for having kept you here so late.”

“Really, Charlie, it’s okay. You didn’t do it on purpose,” says Nick, reaching up and squeezing his shoulder. “It actually gave me a chance to work one on one with her, which I don’t get as much when the other students are here. I think she’s really starting to get better in class. I mean, she still gets distracted and bored and stuff, but I think working one on one with her has actually helped her with that.”

Charlie peers past Nick at his daughter, carefully packing up her bags. He can see a sliver of her tongue sticking out in focus, dark eyebrows pinched in thought. He does notice how she seems to work better when she has less distractions, something her therapist has pointed out several times…

He turns back to Nick. “Well, I am sorry you had to see me like this, then. A crying mess with my hair sticking up like a bird’s nest. You must think I’m such a crybaby.” He laughs dryly to himself, gesturing vaguely at his messy appearance.

“Firstly, stop saying sorry. I’m banning it from my presence, alright? You have nothing to apologise for,” Nick says earnestly. He pokes him in the shoulder. “It’s perfectly okay to get worked up like you did. Don’t you think I’ve seen far worse tantrums from my students all the time? Not that you had a tantrum, but…”

“Did you just compare me to a 6 year old having a tantrum?” asks Charlie, cocking his head to the side.

Nick’s eyes bulge and he shakes his head violently. “What? No, of course not!” he blurts, his voice rising a pitch. “I just mean that you’re perfectly in your rights to get overwhelmed by overwhelming situations. I’d never make my students do it, so you should never apologise for having emotions.”

Charlie smiles up at Nick through his lashes, toeing the ground with his Oxford shoes. His heart feels warm and soft, listening to Nick’s constant kindness. “So, what was the second part of that statement?” he asks after a pause.

“What?”

“You said ‘firstly’, which would suggest there’s at least a ‘secondly’ to your statement,” says Charlie, grinning cheekily. “Come on, even your Year 2s know that stuff.”

Nick rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t drop his grin. “Fine. Secondly, I like your hair like this. It’s not that messy,” he says, reaching up to ruffle Charlie’s hair. “Well, now it is.”

Charlie bites his lip, cheeks burning. As Nick drops his hand, just as red in the face, he turns to his daughter as she makes her way over with her backpack on already. He reaches out and takes her hand, pulling her to his side.

“Thanks again for watching her until I got here,” says Charlie, reaching with his free hand to open the door to the classroom again. “And sorry again for keeping you here at work so late.”

“What did I say about the ‘s’ word?” Nick teases, smirking.

“What’s the ‘S’ word?” asks Maya, looking between them. “Is it a bad word?”

Charlie shakes his head. “Not exactly. Mr. Nelson just thinks I say ‘sorry’ too often and so he won’t let me say it,” he explains.

“You do say it too much, Daddy.”

Charlie’s mouth falls open in shock. Nick cracks up, clutching his stomach and Charlie drags her out of the class behind him. “My own daughter and her teacher! Conspiring against me!” he calls over his shoulder.

“What does ‘conspiring’ mean?”

Chapter Text

On the following Monday, it snows. Charlie wakes up to his alarm and the cat sitting on his chest and flings open his curtains to see a sheet of white across the earth. The snow glistens in the pale sunlight behind the pure white clouds, more flurries in the air so that he can barely see across the street through the thicket of sleet. A few lone walkers pass by, shuffling through the good few inches of snow, bundled up in hats and scarves and puffy jackets, battling against the wind and snow. Another neighbour shovels snow off his car with a neon coloured shovel while kids throw snowballs at each other in the garden.

Pulling on an extra thick jumper, Charlie wanders downstairs to make breakfast, followed shortly by Tibby with her jingling collar.

Halfway through making breakfast and coffee, Charlie gets two calls back to back. The first is from his boss, calling to tell him that because of the snow, no one can get into the building, so he has to work from home that day. Then, the school calls to tell him they’ve closed the school because of the snow. Deciding to give both himself and Maya a bit of a lie in, he goes to sleep for another while.

When Maya comes running into his room in a panic less than two hours later, almost kicking Tibby down the stairs, it takes him two whole minutes to explain that they both have the day off. Maya is ecstatic and begs Charlie to take her to the park to enjoy the snow day at its best, which Charlie gladly agrees to.

After they have breakfast and get dressed up warm for the weather, they head off.

Maya shuffles along down the pavement, her purple puffer jacket and waterproof trousers making it difficult for her to move her limbs properly. The slick ice on the ground only serves to make it even harder for them both and it takes them more than twice the usual amount of time just to get to the park.

When they arrive, they discover that the rest of the kids of the neighbourhood seemed to have the same exact idea. Loads of parents and children stand together at the top of the hill, clutching sleds and snowballs or racing down the hill holding onto their hats.

“Daddy, come on!” Maya shrieks, grabbing Charlie’s hand and dragging him across the park to join in on the fun. Charlie stumbles after her, trying not to slip or drop their yellow sled as he tries to keep up.

As soon as they reach the hill, Maya grabs the sled from her dad and rushes to join a few other kids her age from the area. Charlie hovers off to the side to watch, hands stuffed in his pockets unless he’s occasionally waving to her or clapping when she reaches the bottom with success. Eventually, sick of standing in the cold wind, Charlie settles down against a tree, still watching her from afar.

Charlie hears her squeals of delight all the way down the hill. He smiles to himself as she flies down the hill over and over, cheering at the top of her lungs, dark hair covered in snowflakes. Every time she trudges back up the hill, she waves to him, cheeks rosy and grin wide. Charlie returns the wave every time, fondness growing in his chest with every time. Every day he is immensely thankful to have her in his life, watching her growing up and being a light in his life through it all.

Suddenly, something large and fluffy rams straight into Charlie.

Distracted by watching Maya, Charlie gets knocked over to the side, falling onto his back in a pile of snow.

He yelps in surprise, spluttering in the cold as his hat falls off and something heavy steps on top of him. He squints in the bright sunlight at something furry and brown right in his face, making a panting sound.

“Nellie, be careful!” an incredibly familiar voice calls.

At the sound of her name, the furry thing hops off Charlie and jogs towards the voice of her owner. Charlie, meanwhile, starts to sit up in the snow, winded both by the Border Collie knocking him over and the sight of Nick fucking Nelson making his way towards him at a jog.

“I’m so sorry about her. She got off her lead and—” Nick cuts off his apology as he recognizes just who his dog knocked over, his mouth falling open and his feet coming to a halt in the snow.

Charlie pushes to his feet, blinking. Nick stands a meter away, dressed in a big blue jacket with a beanie, the hood of a navy hoodie poking out of the top. His cheeks are bright and rosy, wet with the snow and flakes hanging from the strands of his hair poking out his hat.

“Charlie? What are you doing here?” Nick blurts, eyes wide.

“Nick!” Charlie exclaims, getting to his feet. “Hi! We were just enjoying the snowday.” Charlie points vaguely towards the hill where Maya stands at the top with a couple others her age, chatting with her sled at her side.

Nick laughs, looking over. “I can see that,” he chimes. The dog at his side barks, jumping up and down and brushing a paw up Nick’s trouser leg. He smirks down at her and pats her head. “Oh, yeah, you guys haven’t met yet! This is Nellie!”

Charlie grins, kneeling down beside her and petting her head with his bare hands. Her fur effectively warms his chilly hands as he pats her.

“Oh, you’re adorable!” he cries, laughing as she tries to lick his face. Nick laughs and kneels down next to Charlie, so close their shoulders touch, joining him in petting his dog.

“Woah, is that a puppy?” Not long after they both begin petting and baby-talking to Nellie, Maya comes rushing over, sledge bouncing side to side as she drags it behind her, sprinting towards them. She stumbles to a stop when she nears them, her eyes going wide as saucers. “Mr. Nelson! Is that your dog?”

“Why, hello, Miss Maya!” Nick calls, standing up and beaming at his student. “Indeed she is. This is Nellie.”

“Oh, my gosh!” Maya yelps, dropping to her knees next to Nellie. Nellie immediately begins licking her face as well, yipping with delight as Maya pets her all over, giggling and squealing. “You’re so cute!”

Nick laughs and moves next to her, a big grin on his face to match Maya’s. The two of them begin talking nonstop, petting Nellie and chatting about how Maya’s day off is going. Charlie pulls back a bit to watch them, Maya in her big puffy coat and rosy cheeks and Nick with his snow-covered head and his broad grin as he excitedly listens to Maya rambling on. His face is bright with something akin to fondness as he speaks to Maya with utmost care and cheerfulness. Charlie feels something warm and soft in his chest, warming his entire body as he looks on at two of his favourite people together.

“Come on, Charlie! Join us!” Nick exclaims, turning over his shoulder to beam up at Charlie.

God, when you look at me like that, I know I’m never getting over you, Charlie thinks as his chest only tightens further.

“Yeah, Daddy!” Maya mimics, jumping up and grabbing Charlie’s hand, dragging him over to join them.

And so, the three of them play around in the snow together. They chase each other around the park, throwing snowballs and running after Nellie. Charlie gets Nick right in the face with a snowball and Nick retaliates by stuffing a handful of snow down the back of his shirt, getting Charlie to utter the highest shriek he’s ever made. Maya talks them into going sledding again and somehow Charlie and Nick end up racing down the hill, Nellie running after them, barking out loud as they both scream.

“Again, again! I wanna go with Daddy!” Maya exclaims as Nick and Charlie trudge up the hill, both out of breath. They share a glance, both knowing they are likely far too old to be doing this.

Charlie rolls his eyes, but he hops into the sledge without complaint. Nick helps Maya into his lap, holding onto the back of the sled.

“Okay, on three!” Nick yells. “One… two… three!”

Nick shoves Charlie’s back and Charlie and Maya go sliding down the hill at top speed, Charlie gripping onto Maya around her tummy with all his strength. Maya shrieks right in his ears, throwing her arms over her head. His surroundings rush past in a sickening blur of colour and he swears his stomach turns itself inside out as he whizzes down.

Before they know it, they glide to a halt at the bottom, narrowly avoiding a pile of snow.

Somehow, they end up going up and down the hill another countless times for the next hour, taking turns on the sled or going together, trudging back up the hill or racing to the top. Nellie hops up and down in the snow, digging little burrows or chasing after the few animals not hibernating or barking at Nick, Charlie and Maya going up and down the hill.

“Again!” Maya squeals, jumping up and down as Charlie breathlessly reaches the top of the hill once more, his face bright red from exertion as well as the cold.

“No—more,” Charlie huffs breathlessly, wheezing. He lets go of the rope attached to the sled and flops down in the snow, arms out, facing up to the pure white sky. It started snowing again an hour prior, the white flakes fluttering down rapidly and getting in everyone’s hair (or fur, in Nellie’s case.).

“Awww, but Daddy!” Maya whines, pouting, furrowing her eyebrows together and putting her hands on her hips.

Nick, pausing his attempts to catch snow on his tongue, pats her on the shoulder, smiling down at her. “You can keep going if you want, Maya, but I think both your dad and I are all tired out. We’re much too old for this,” says Nick, smirking. “Right, Mr. Spring?” Out of Maya’s eyeline, Charlie sticks up his middle finger and Nick chuckles.

Maya grabs the sledge and Nellie’s lead and takes off towards the hill once again, leaving Charlie and Nick alone once more.

Nick slumps down beside Charlie on the snowy ground, mere millimetres away from him. They lie in silence for a long time, just staring up at the sky and the snow, listening to the sound of Maya’s laughing, Nellie’s barking and all the surrounding chatter from the few people leftover at the park. Charlie feels utterly at ease, lying here on the ground, next to Nick, with nothing to do but enjoying himself.

They lie stupidly close to each other, shoulders pressing together and hands bumping between them. When he looks at Nick's face, Nick is already looking back at him, his brown eyes wide and soft and his mouth slightly open, like he can’t find the words to say.

Nick’s smile widens when they make eye contact and he bumps their shoulders together, biting his bottom lip. Snowflakes catch in his eyelashes and his hair, making him look like he stepped right out of a winter fairytale and into Charlie’s life. Charlie wonders how he got so lucky as to have Nick this close, to be able to be even in his presence with him looking like that. He forces himself to look away, closing his eyes tight for a second.

He cannot let himself fall like the snow from the sky. While Charlie is a constantly falling flake of snow, Nick is like a tropical island he knows will immediately melt him. He cannot get too close to Nick, not now, not ever.

“You look kind of magical like this,” Nick marvels, eyes moving all over Charlie’s face, drinking him all in. His voice has gone quiet, almost swallowed whole by the wind carrying the snow around them.

Charlie covers his face with a hand, scrunching down into the collar of his coat to hide his growing blush. “What, freezing and damp from the snow?” he jokes, spreading his fingers to look at Nick between them. “Do I actually?”

Nick just nods, eyes soft.

Charlie covers his face with both hands, letting out an unhuman half-yelp, unable to articulate just how much Nick’s words affect him. How can he just say stuff like that out of the blue, unprompted, right in front of him? What deity did Charlie please to get someone like Nick to say that to him?

“Ooh, are you guys making snow angels?”

Charlie drops his hands to look up at his daughter, who appears to have abandoned her sledging, wandering over to where he lies on the ground with Nick. Nellie sits next to her, tail wagging back and forth.

“Sure, if you like,” says Charlie, glancing sideways.

“I wanna join!” Maya exclaims, stepping over Charlie’s legs and depositing herself between them.

Both Nick and Charlie scoot aside to give her more space and they all spread their limbs out, pushing the snow back and forth, laughing. Nick jumps up, pulling his phone out of his pocket. Charlie and Maya continue to make snow angels together as Nick takes photo after photo of them before hopping down to join them once again.

As soon as Nellie joins the mix, any attempts at proper snow angels are abandoned. Still sitting on the ground, they dote on Nellie, petting her and laughing at the snow getting caught in her fur or on the tip of her black nose.

Nick takes even more photos, photographing Nellie licking Maya’s face and Charlie sprinkling snow on top of her and even getting the four of them into a few selfies, though many of them turn out blurry or photobombed with just Nellie’s face in the camera. Maya adores every minute of it, making them pull funny faces or trying to get Nellie to bark at the camera as she piles on top of both Nick and Charlie. Neither of them complain when she elbows them in the face or accidentally splashes snow in their face.

After a while, drenched and frozen, they finally decide to call it quits.

Charlie is cold all the way through to his pants and his curls have stuck to his forehead from the wetness of the snow. Nick’s grey joggers are soaked through as well and Maya begins shivering nonstop, even in her thick coat and multiple layers underneath it. Nick re-attaches Nellie’s lead and they make their way to the exit of the park together.

They walk down the street together in high spirits. Maya takes Nellie’s lead and marches on ahead of Nick and Charlie, chattering to Nellie, whose tail continues to wag. Behind her, Nick bumps Charlie’s arm and links their pinkies together briefly, squeezing like he’s making a promise. It sends a thrill through Charlie’s body, his entire body vibrating with it.

After a few minutes, they reach a crossroad. To the right is Charlie and Maya’s street, their house a few doors down.

“Er, I’m this way,” Nick says, coming to a stop. He points down the opposite street, biting his lip.

“Yeah, we’re the other way,” says Charlie, frowning. He turns to Maya. “Maya, give Mr. Nelson the lead so he can take Nellie back to their house.”

“But I wanna keep walking her!”

“Sweetheart, it’s freezing. We should go get out of these clothes and into something warmer inside,” says Charlie, bending down, hands on his knees. “I’ll even make you a hot chocolate.”

That gets her. She instantly tosses the end of the leash towards Nick. He catches it midair with a laugh.

“Bye, Mr. Nelson! Thanks for playing with us and letting me meet Nellie!” she exclaims, bouncing on her toes. She waves goodbye to Nick and then takes off down the street.

“Oh, for fucks sake. She’ll break her neck,” Charlie mutters. “Maya! Slow down! It’s icy!” Maya slows down ever so slightly, but doesn’t stop.

“Ah, kids. Welcome to my every day,” says Nick, watching her with a fond smile. “Especially her, to be honest.”

Charlie sighs, brushing snow from his frozen curls and shaking his head. He turns to Nick to say goodbye, but Nick catches his hand in his free one, lacing their fingers together. It sends Charlie’s heart racing faster than their sled going down the hill earlier that day.

“I had a really good time, today,” he murmurs, nudging his toe into Charlie’s. “And to think I was planning to just walk Nellie quickly and then dive into the romance novel my Mum got me for my birthday a couple months ago.”

“Funny how things turn out, isn’t it?” replies Charlie, grinning. He looks down at their shoes, Nick’s Vans and his snow boots, then back up at Nick. “And I had a good time, too.”

“I’m glad.”

Nick looks at Charlie like he hung the moon and the stars, his smile so wide his eyes almost close, crinkling in the corners. He drops Charlie’s hand and moves closer. He steps forwards and pulls Charlie into a hug, tucking his chin on his shoulder. Charlie returns the hug, holding his breath, heart racing in his chest.

Then they pull apart and Charlie spins on his heel and starts down the street, hands in his pockets and a blush on his face.

When he gets back home, letting a very frozen Maya inside, he has a notification on his phone.

Nick Nelson has requested to follow you.

Charlie smiles and accepts.
~~~
Nick and Charlie begin messaging each other as soon as they start following each other and decide to exchange numbers—they both agree they’re too old to be messaging in their DMs. For the rest of the day, in between editing manuscripts and phoning the office, Charlie and Nick text almost nonstop. Charlie carries his phone everywhere now, waiting for the next response or texting Nick as he walks from one room to the next or while he cooks dinner.

After their unexpected snow day, Nick sends Charlie the photos he took. When he looks through them, Charlie has to sit down.

They’re wonderful.

There’s loads of photos of him and Maya in the snow, grinning at each other or up at the sky or the camera, rosy cheeks and snowy hair, having a blast. Then he moves onto the ones of them all in the snow and his heart jumps to his throat at the sight. There’s a few of Charlie and Nellie; Charlie laughing as Nellie licks her nose; a few of Nellie and Maya, Nellie panting at the camera while Maya grins toothily; there’s plenty of group shots depicting them getting half trampled by Nellie, Maya lying all over Nick and Charlie while they both try to smile at the camera with two bodies piled on top of them, getting in the way or Nellie getting right up in the frame.

And then he gets to a few that only include him and Nick. There’s a few of them both smiling at the camera, all posed and cheery. But then there’s one of Charlie looking at Nick as he smirks at the camera, an affectionate, loving expression on his pink face. Charlie stares at that one for a long time, zooming in on Nick’s beautiful face or looking at his own stupidly fond grin. The last of the two of them has them both looking at each other, the top of Nellie’s head peeking in, both of them looking deep into each other’s eyes with affection and the widest grins he’s seen on either of their faces.

It’s the only time Charlie puts his phone down for days, unable to process all the adorable, picture perfect photos of them all together in the snow.

They look like a family.

Charlie pushes that thought aside and continues to text Nick like he didn’t just turn his entire body inside out with those photos. He flirts and he teases and they talk about anything and everything, texting until well into the middle of the night. He feels like a teenager again, messaging his crush under the covers late at night, grinning like an idiot.

He’s aware that this likely is not something Nick does with any other parents, at least.

In the week leading up to the winter holidays and the winter fundraiser, Charlie’s sister Tori comes to visit him. Charlie picks her up from the train station on his way from work and she comes with him to go collect Maya from school. He’s lucky his boss let him leave early because the snow still lingers from the snow day a few days ago, so it takes him even longer to drive anywhere.

“Victoria! It’s lovely to see you!” Charlie greets, standing outside his car as Tori wheels her suitcase out of the station. They share a brief hug, awkward with her bag in between them. “Let me get your bag for you,” he adds, holding an arm as he steps back again. She rolls her eyes, but hands it over, getting into the passenger’s seat while he pops her bag in the boot.

“Where’s Michael? I thought he was coming, too?” Charlie asks, getting into the driver’s seat. “You guys didn’t fight or something, did you?”

“Nah, he’s held up at work. He’ll come in a couple days on his own,” she explains, buckling her seatbelt. “I thought I texted you about it.”

“You know you didn’t.”

Tori just shrugs. She’s always been bad at texting and she still hasn’t improved with age. Charlie shakes his head and starts up the car, pulling out of the parking space and heading off towards Maya’s school.

On the drive, they chat about their respective jobs and Charlie asks about her fiance, Michael and she asks him about the ‘hot teacher’ he told her about over the phone and they complain about their parents as well. Tori laughs when he swears at a driver for overtaking him and he makes fun of her for still insisting on playing the same music as she listened to as a teenager, their usual banter coming back like they haven’t been apart at all.

Just as Tori finishes telling him about something stupid Michael did the other day at work, they pull into the car park of Maya’s school.

“Do you want to come with?” Charlie asks, shutting the engine off and clicking his seatbelt button.

Tori shrugs, already unbuckling her own seatbelt and opening the car door. Charlie snorts at her silence and they head to the school together.

Maya is on the swings again when they reach the fence. Her hair is hanging loose at her shoulders, getting in her face as she swings back and forth with one of the other girls. Nick leans against the swings, watching them closely and urging them to be careful. Due to being slightly later than usual(this time, Charlie warned Nick ahead of time), there’s only 3 children left at the after school pick up. Charlie texted Imogen beforehand as well, asking her if she can just collect Timothy on her own.

“Maya, look who I’ve got with me!” Charlie calls, leaning against the fence and gesturing to his sister standing next to him with her arms crossed. He puts one of his elbows on her shoulders and she pretends not to notice it.

“Tori!” Maya shrieks.

Without warning, she suddenly lets go of the chains and flies up into the air. Charlie gasps, eyes bulging until she lands on the ground without a stumble. Charlie sighs in relief.

“Maya, what did I tell you about jumping off the swing so high?” Nick chastises.

Maya ignores him, running over to the fence with a grin, dark hair and grey skirt flying out behind her. She comes to a halt with a clatter against the metal, grabbing the top of the fence with both hands.

“Hi, Aunt Tori!” she exclaims, face practically splitting open in a grin.

Charlie was almost surprised at how well Maya gets on with Tori. While Maya is a talkative, bubbly, social girl who likes to run around and is constantly full to the brim with energy, Tori is shy, sarcastic and cynical and hates running around. Yet somehow, since she was a baby, Maya always absolutely adored Tori, insisting on being held by her and following her around as soon as she was able to walk. Tori, used to having cared for their little brother Oliver and also Charlie as a kid, caught on with Maya like a house on fire and tolerates her bubbly personality better than she handles anyone else.

Charlie likes to think Maya’s carefree, bubbly spirit rubs off on his sister at least slightly.

“Hey, kiddo. It’s good to see you,” Tori greets, a tiny smile peeking out which she reserves only for her favourites. Charlie has seen this smile directed at him maybe twice. “You’re getting big, too. I don’t know if I’ll be able to carry you anymore.”

“But Daddy can carry me and he’s much smaller than you!” she cries.

She fails to notice the glance Charlie and Tori exchange with each other. They both know her ‘smaller’ comment has nothing to do with their heights.

“Uh, hey, who’s this?”

Distracted by his sister and daughter interacting, Charlie hadn’t even noticed Nick wandering over until he spoke. He glances up. Nick hovers a few feet back from Maya, looking between Charlie and Tori with a frown. His face is unreadable, twisted in a slight grimace as though it hurts to try to smile.

“Mr. Nelson! This is Tori!” Maya chimes, looking over her shoulder.

“Er, yeah. Tori, this is Maya’s teacher, Mr. Nelson. The one I was telling you about on our way here,” Charlie explains to Tori, gesturing between them and pulling back from her.

“Cool. Nice to meet you,” says Tori, not even bothering to smile. Charlie wants to slap himself. Or her.

Nick crosses his arms, still wearing a poor attempt at a smile. Charlie frowns. He has never once seen Nick looking this awkward in all the time he’s known him. His shoulders are hunched under his brown winter jacket, eyes scanning Tori with bright red cheeks. Perhaps it’s because of the cold, but Charlie has no clue what is going on.

“So, how do you guys, er, know each other?” Nick asks. He coughs, kicking the mulch with his shoe. Charlie doesn’t miss the way his eyes dart between the two of them.

“Our parents introduced us,” Tori deadpans, expressionless. Nick just looks more uncomfortable.

“Jeez, Tori,” Charlie mutters, kicking her ankle. He gives Nick an apologetic smile and explains, “Sorry about her. Tori is my older sister. Maya’s aunt.”

Nick’s eyes bulge and his shoulders actually drop, as if in relief. At long last, a smile crosses his face, small and a little sheepish, but definitely a smile. “Oh, right. That makes sense,” says Nick, head bobbing. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Tori. I hope whatever Maya tells you about me is positive.”

“Oh, don’t worry. Charlie’s already told me nothing but positive things about you,” says Tori, still expressionless. She looks down at Maya. “Where’s your bag, Maya? Let’s go get it and head to the car.”

She ditches Charlie and Nick at the fence and follows Maya around the fence and over to where her bag has been left by the wall. Without Maya to diffuse the tension and Tori to make it worse, the silence between them turns awkward for the first time ever.

“I’m sorry about her. She’s… slow to warm to people,” Charlie says, breaking the quiet. He glances over Nick’s shoulder where Maya and Tori are talking by the gate. He sees Tori watching them.

“Siblings. I know the feeling,” says Nick, looking back over his shoulder. “I have an older brother, but we don’t even speak now. He was an jerk when I was a kid, so I dropped contact with him once I went to uni.” He emphasises ‘jerk’, making clear that that is a light way to describe him.

Charlie’s eyebrows dive upwards at that information. “Seriously? That bad?”

Nick grimaces, running his hands through his hair. A few pieces stick up and Charlie fights the urge to smooth them down. “Yeah, for sure. He was super homophobic and just all around nasty to anyone associated with me. My mum talks to him from time to time, but she doesn’t even invite him to Christmas dinner anymore,” he continues. Nick sighs, dropping his head. “Trust me, it takes a really horrible person for my mum to dislike you. Once he became almost viscerally homophobic, not even Mum could tolerate it much.”

“Homophobic?” says Charlie, voice rising a pitch.

Nick hums affirmatively. “Yeah, when I came out in sixth form, he was a complete tosser about it,” explains Nick lowly.

Charlie decides to think about Nick’s mention of coming out later. Instead, he says, “Wow, Nick, that really sounds awful. I don’t speak to my parents much, especially my Mum, but I can’t imagine my siblings being so bad.” He looks back across the playground. Tori pushes Maya on the swing, nodding along politely as Maya babbles on about something.

“Have you got another sibling then?” asks Nick.

Charlie nods. “I’ve also got a younger brother, Oliver, but he’s only just finishing uni now, since he was born a lot later,” he explains. “He’s still a delight, actually. He’s sort of like Maya in a way, very chatty and active.”

“Well, maybe I’ll meet him as well someday,” says Nick, his face softening as Charlie talks about his brother. Charlie swears his knees almost buckle.

Tori calls Charlie over and he reluctantly says goodbye to Nick and follows the girls back to the car. When he gets in, Tori gives him a knowing smile, raising an eyebrow.

“What?” Charlie asks, turning the engine on and frowning.

Tori shrugs. “Nothing. Just thinking about how Mr. Nelson was acting,” she replies. She turns in her seat to Maya. “Is he always like that, Maya?”

Maya shakes her head. “No, he was acting really weird. I’m not sure he liked you at first,” says Maya, turning to look out the window as Charlie pulls out of the parking space and heads off again, kicking her legs back and forth.

“Well, I certainly have an idea,” says Tori, eyeing Charlie from the side. Then she coughs something which almost makes Charlie swerve off the road.

Chapter Text

Finally, the day of the Winter Fundraiser arrives a few days later. Charlie begs his boss to let him leave work early—having finished much of his work already anyway—to get to school to help set up. Even still, when he arrives at the assembly hall, most of the stalls and decor have already been set up at least partly.

All the windows have been decorated with stick-on snowflakes and all the different tables have been set up around the room in a wide two layer U shape with a walkway between the two rows. There’s a couple bake sales set up with elaborate cakes, cupcakes, cookies and pastries, all themed for winter or different holidays. There’s a crafts table with snowmen, Christmas trees, Santas, menorahs, kinaras and sled cut outs and bookmarks with stickers and even more Charlie can’t even comprehend. The librarian has a whole set up of books about all the winter holidays, as well as a few fiction books taking place during the winter, like ‘Narnia' or ‘The Gruffalo’s Child.’ Here and there, other parents are finishing off different stalls selling things like tea-cozies, homemade jumpers, candles and soap cut into winter shapes. Someone has also set up a piano by the stage with a few music books scattered on it, a music teacher practicing scales before others arrive.

The room is abuzz with chatter and noise, parents and a few teachers hurrying around, trying to set things up. A few parents are arguing about tinsel while two of the teachers are trying to clean up a spillage of eggnog on the floor. Darcy and the other art teacher are sorting out a large painted banner while a few PE teachers help to set up the heavier tables.

“Charlie! There you are!” Sahar makes her way over to Charlie, still lingering by the entrance. She has on an oversized blue jumper with a bunch of snowflakes and a snowman with a red hat knitted onto it, looking very cosy and festive. Charlie feels a bit out of place still dressed in his work clothes. “Could you come help set up the crafts table with Emily and Harry?”

Charlie follows her across the room to the craft table in question and stops in front. He recognises Emily from other PTA meetings, a friendly woman with two twins in the year below Maya. Harry, however, is a stranger to Charlie.

With a cocky grin and dark hair swept back from his face using gel, Harry looks like a proper entitled White man. When Charlie and Sahar arrive, he’s arguing with Emily about cutting out snowflakes correctly, the table covered in bits of cut up paper. Aside from some paper snowflakes, there’s also an example penguin using a hand cut out, a snowman made out of cotton wool balls and a few ‘winter characters’ made out of toilet paper rolls and coloured paper.

“Hey, guys, this is Charlie Spring. Have you met?” Sahar raises her voice to interrupt the argument, making both of them go quiet.

“Hi, Charlie. We’ve met at the PTA meetings,” says Emily, waving a hand covered in glitter and a few pieces of paper cuttings.

Charlie returns the wave.

“Ah, but you won’t have met Harry?” adds Sahar. Both Charlie and Harry shake their heads. “Great! Well, Charlie, this is Harry Greene. He’s married to Elizabeth on the PTA, but she couldn’t be here, so he’s helping out instead.”

“Alright, Charlie? The missus has told me all about you,” says Harry in a posh Londoner accent. It reminds him uncomfortably of the boys he used to go to school with.

“Er, alright,” says Charlie. He glances at Sahar. “So, what am I needed for here?”

“Well, once the kids and their families start to arrive, you guys will be manning the table. Taking money and helping the kids with the crafts, you know,” Sahar explains. “Can either of you guys show Charlie the crafts and a quick rundown of how to do them, please?”

Admittedly, the crafts themselves don’t take very long to go over; they were made for even the year 1s to understand, after all. So, once Emily and Harry explain the basics, arguing briefly over the order of a few steps, they have nothing left to do at the crafts table but to wait.

So they chat. What starts as Charlie and Emily politely discussing their children quickly gets derailed by Harry, who gets bored of their conversation quickly. This immediately spirals into yet another argument between Harry and Emily, which Charlie chooses not to join.

Charlie watches this exchange with mild amusement, more baffled than anything, eyebrows disappearing behind his fringe. He looks around the room as their argument grows tiresome, recognising a few friendly faces and smiling or waving at them. After a moment of searching, Nick enters the room with one of the PE teachers, holding a rugby ball under his arm and talking quickly, using his hands a lot. He has a pair of reindeer antlers on his head, slightly tilted to the side as he moves. Charlie smiles softly at the interaction.

“Ooh, what’re you looking at, Charlie, mate? Checking out one of the hot mums?” Harry breaks Charlie’s thoughts, elbowing his side. Charlie leans out of reach and frowns at the other man, eyebrows pinched together. “Or, if my sources are right, you prefer the hot dads, don’t you?” He wiggles his eyebrows up and down and Charlie wants to punch him.

“Oh, for goodness sake, Harry. Charlie’s not gay,” says Emily, rolling her eyes and shooting Charlie an apologetic smile. “He’s got a kid, for one thing.”

“Ah, but gay people can get kids these days, can’t they?” says Harry, glancing at Charlie like he’ll confirm his statement. He is, unfortunately, correct.

“Well, yes, but—”

“Actually, Emily, Harry’s right,” says Charlie, getting tired of having his own sexuality speculated right in front of him. As though he isn’t right there. “I am gay. And you know Maya, so.”

“Oh! I didn’t know that! I just thought your wife was just one of those working mums or something!” says Emily, playing with her hair awkwardly. “Where’s your husband then? Or is he working? And how did you guys get Maya? Is she adopted?”

Charlie blinks, staring at Emily as she bombards him with questions. Harry crosses his arms and leans back again, sucking in his lips with a smug look on his face as Emily stammers and blushes and asks Charlie uncomfortable questions. Finally, Charlie huffs and admits defeat, getting up.

“Excuse me,” he mutters, spinning on the heels of his old Oxfords and leaving the two alone. He hears their bickering start up again immediately.

He marches up to where Imogen, Sahar and Nick are now standing in a trio, talking.

“Charlie!” exclaims Nick, dropping his rugby ball on the ground in his excitement. It bounces a few feet away.

“Hello, Charlie!” says Imogen, bending down to pass Nick the ball. “I thought Sahar put you at the crafts table.”

Charlie glances back over his shoulder at the crafts table. Emily and Harry are still bickering. He turns back to his friends. “She did, but—”

“Christian, no! Not over that side! The other one!” Sahar suddenly interrupts, yelling at Mr. McBride across the room, standing atop a stepladder with a large banner overhead. “Sorry, Charlie.” She pats his arm and hurries over to him, still yelling.

“What were you going to say, Charlie?” asks Nick, peeling his eyes away from Sahar telling off Christian.

“What? Oh, yeah. I was coming to ask if I could possibly move to a different table,” Charlie explains, aiming his question more at Imogen. He tries to keep his agitation out of his voice, but he’s not sure he accomplishes it.

Imogen looks down at her purple clipboard, trailing one of her manicured fingers down the long list on her paper. “I dunno, Charlie. I’ll have to move people around a bit,” she explains, gritting her teeth. “Why do you want to move, anyway?”

“Yeah, is someone bothering you?” adds Nick. His gaze is over Charlie’s shoulder, in the direction of the table and he puffs his chest out, straightening up defensively. With the rugby ball tucked under his arm, he looks like a proper rugby lad, ready for a tackle. Minus, perhaps, the reindeer antlers. “Look, I went to school with Harry and I know what he’s like. If you want, I can talk to him if he was being a dick.”

“Well, I just watched him and Emily speculating my sexuality right in front of me,” says Charlie. “Emily was under the impression that because I’ve got a daughter, I can’t possibly be gay and Harry was insisting I must be checking out ‘hot dads’ in the room because his wife apparently told him she thinks I’m gay or something.”

“Aren’t you?” says Imogen, tilting her head.

“Yeah, but that’s not the point,” says Charlie, scraping the back of his neck with his fingertips.

“I think what Charlie’s trying to say is that he was uncomfortable with strangers talking about his own sexuality like he wasn’t there. Not to mention, it sounds like they were using a lot of stereotypes and rumours to decide,” says Nick, brows furrowing. He runs a hand through his hair, seemingly forgetting his antlers as they scew dangerously close to falling off now.

“Exactly,” says Charlie, nodding. “And then when I confirmed the rumours, Emily started bombarding me with really weird, invasive questions while Harry just looked smug for being right. It made my skin crawl.”

Imogen and Nick both wince. Nick frowns in the direction of the crafts table, shoulders squared. “Charlie should definitely switch with someone else,” he says decisively.

Imogen bites her lip and looks back at her paper. She looks around the room, eyes narrowed, then back at the list and back up at Nick. “I dunno. I could swap him and Lucille out and put him at the bake sale area, but I don’t think Lucille and Emily get along either.” She scans once again. “Ooh! Or maybe I could—”

“You could switch him with Otis,” suggests Nick. “He’s sort of friendly with Harry isn’t he? Not to mention, your husband should be the easiest to convince.”

Imogen looks down at her list. “Good idea, Nicholas! I’ll be back!” She shoves her clipboard at Nick and spins on her heels, skirt twirling as she skips over to her husband sitting over at a hot chocolate and non-alcoholic eggnog station.

“I’m really sorry about Harry,” Nick says once Imogen is gone. “He’s a lot better than he used to be, but I don’t think he ever quite matured past age 14.”

Charlie snorts. He turns around and spots Harry at the table, leaning back again while Emily pouts at him. Charlie suspects they’re on the verge of having an affair with each other, but he keeps it to himself.

“I can definitely see that,” he says, turning back to Nick. “Anyway, what are you doing for the fundraiser today? What have you been tasked with?”

Nick lifts up Imogen’s clipboard and tilts it so that both of them can look it over. Sahar has drawn out a whole floor plan of the room, colour coded and labelled at every table with initials at every table drawing. On the side of the page, the assigned initials have the full names of the people, written in Imogen’s neat handwriting. It’s quite impressive, actually. Nick taps his name on the list and then slides his index across the page to his initials, stopping on the “Hot Drinks” table with NN and OS labelled beside it.

Right where Otis is right now. Right where Charlie might be soon if Otis agrees to swap.

~~~

A little while later, once Imogen coaxed Otis into working the crafts table instead, Charlie and Nick set up shop at the hot drinks table together. They have a small blue and yellow safe between them and three large tubs full of hot drinks, labelled accordingly: tea; eggnog; and hot chocolate. They set up a jug of milk in front for the tea. In front, they stack up paper cups and lids before sitting down to wait for their first customers.

“You want to know a fun fact about hot chocolate versus hot cocoa?” asks Charlie, sitting down once they finish setting up the table.

Nick tilts his head. “Is there one?” he asks.

Charlie straightens up, smiling. “Yup. Hot chocolate requires cocoa powder, hot water and milk. But hot cocoa is just the hot water and cocoa powder,” Charlie explains. “So, I hope this stuff has been made with milk or else it’s false advertising.” Charlie pats the top of the tub labelled as hot chocolate.

“We didn’t use milk because of allergies,” says Nick. He glances at the label.

“Oh, no! You’re falsely advertising it as hot chocolate!” Charlie blurts. “I can get you arrested for that, you know!”

Nick shakes his head vigorously, knocking his antlers onto the table. He rifles around the inside pocket of his blazer (which he has on for once) until he pulls out a blue pen. He pops the cap and reaches around to take the paper off the hot cocoa tub and scribbles out the word ‘chocolate’. Then, he writes ‘cocoa’ underneath the scribbling and replaces it in front of the tub. He repeats the same on the label on their side, drawing a little smiley face next to it.

“There we go. Now you can’t call the police on me for false advertisement,” says Nick. He grins smugly and folds his arms in front of his chest, dropping the pen onto the table.

Charlie opens his mouth and slaps Nick’s chest, crinkling his nose in disbelief. Nick just continues to smirk and raises his arms palms up. Charlie rolls his eyes and lifts Nick’s antlers, placing them on his own head.

The doors to the assembly room opening a moment later cuts their conversation off abruptly. Immediately a sea of primary school kids and their family members swarm into the hall, making their way over to all the tables like ants to a picnic. The noise in the room picks up tenfold, squeals of delight and laughter filling the air. Over at the piano, the music teacher begins playing one of the songs from Frozen, undercutting the rest of the noise.

After that, Nick and Charlie don’t get much time for talking anymore. People start queueing up at their stall and they create a system, Charlie handling the change and orders because of his better maths skills while Nick prepares the drinks. Charlie steals a notepad from one of the other stalls and keeps a tally of how many of each drink choice they take, adding up the price as he goes along, using Nick’s pen. They work together in tandem, staying just out of each other’s way easily, giving each other the orders and switching back and forth as they do their respective jobs without trouble.

Like everything else, serving the hot drinks table together comes naturally.

About an hour into the fundraiser, Maya appears in the queue, holding onto Tori’s sleeve and bouncing on her heels. She waves to Nick and Charlie, beaming.

“Hello, hello, hello,” Nick greets a few minutes later when they finally reach the front of the queue. He passes off the latest cup of hot cocoa to the last customer and gives Tori and Maya a small smile.

“Hi, Mr. Nelson!” Maya chirps. “Can I have a hot cocoa and…” She looks up at Tori. “What did you want again? I forgot.”

Tori smirks down at her niece. She turns to Charlie, whose pen hovers over the notepad, awaiting its tally mark. “Take a guess, Charles.”

“Nick, make her an eggnog. She hates tea and anything fun like hot cocoa,” says Charlie, ticking off on the tallies. He reads out the price to Tori and holds out his hand to catch the change. As soon as he pulls away to count the money, Nick finishes making Maya’s drink and passes it over to her. Charlie passes Tori the change and then Nick hands her the eggnog in perfect succession.

“Look at you guys, working together so well!”

Charlie’s neck snaps as he turns to the sound of the voice. His eyes bulge when he spots Darcy, a dark haired Black woman he’s never seen and Isaac, Tao and Elle standing to the side of the table, dressed up in ugly Christmas jumpers. Darcy, wearing a rainbow bobble hat, looks smug at getting a reaction out of Charlie.

“What are you guys doing here?” Charlie asks, leaning past one of the drink jugs, eyes wide. He looks between his friends in shock.

“Tori told us to come,” says Tao, hands in the pockets of his black jeans. “We thought we’d come to support the school financially.”

“Care to introduce me, Charlie?” Nick asks. He passes a mother a cup and takes the pen out of Charlie’s grasp, tallying as Charlie gets distracted by his friends.

Charlie crosses his arms and sits back. “These are my friends I told you about. That’s Tao and Elle Xu-Argent and Isaac Henderson,” says Charlie. One by one, his friends wave to Nick.

“Oh!” Darcy exclaims, pointing to the woman beside her. “This is my wife Tara Jones. I forgot you guys hadn’t met yet.”

Nick’s eyes go wide and he drops one of the—thankfully empty—cups in his lap. Jaw hanging open, he leans forwards, staring directly at Tara. Charlie does a double-take, catching Tao’s eyes in confusion.

“Not Tara Jones who went to Higgs, Tara Jones?” says Nick.

“Yup. That’s me,” says Tara, waving a hand again with a bemused smile.

Nick’s jaw drops open. Forgetting about the growing queue, he jumps up and points at Tara. “You! Remember me? We kissed back in, like, year 8, remember?”

Tara’s eyes go wide. “Nick! Oh, my God! How could I forget?” she blurts, pointing at him as well. “I never would have guessed that the Nick Nelson Darcy told me about would be the same one from school!”

“I am super lost right now,” says Charlie, looking back and forth between his friends.

“Me, too,” says Darcy, her head to the side. “I wasn’t aware my lesbian wife ever even kissed a guy, never mind this, guy.”

“To be fair, I wasn’t exactly aware she was a lesbian at the time,” says Nick, smirking. “Plot twist!”

Charlie snorts, slapping his forehead. God, he’s crushing on such a dork.

“Yeah, that’s a bigger plot twist than ‘Get Out!’” says Tao. Nick points at Tao in agreement, grinning broadly and nodding.

“I hate to break up this odd reunion, but can we please get some drinks?” The conversation is abruptly cut off by a scowling dad and his son, arms folded over his chest and one of his toes actually tapping on the floor.

“Oh, sorry!” Elle exclaims. “Well, it was nice to meet the man Charlie is always telling us about. See you!”

A moment later, everyone but Nick and Charlie scatters to the other nearby stalls immediately.

Chapter Text

The fundraiser begins to die down a couple more hours later. Charlie and Nick both offer to help clean up after everyone leaves, despite both of them being exhausted from their extra hours of manual work. Charlie gave Tori the keys to his car to let her take Maya home a couple hours in, adorning Nick’s reindeer antlers and carrying a toilet roll snowman and a toy dreidel. He says his goodbyes to his friends as well, Nick enthusiastically saying goodbye to Tara and Darcy while Tao, Elle and Isaac carry away their many items from the stalls.

Once the rest of the stragglers have left, Nick and Charlie close the cash box and sit back in their chairs, heaving matching sighs of exhaustion.

“So, what are you doing over the break?” Charlie asks. He leans his head against the back of his chair, rolling it to the side to glance at Nick.

Nick mirrors the position, biting his lip. “My mum is coming to visit me for Christmas and we’ll make Christmas dinner together. My dad should hopefully call me either that day or on Boxing Day, at least. I hope,” says Nick. Charlie hums in interest, adjusting to give him his full attention. “My parents divorced when I was a kid, so Dad went back to France and doesn’t really visit the UK much anymore. We’re not really close, so a phone call is the most I expect these days. Though, I’m lucky to hear from him once a month, at this point.”

“Fucking hell, Nick. The more you tell me about your family, the worse it gets,” says Charlie, shaking his head against the chair. “Except your mum. She seems nice, at least.”

“And don’t forget Nellie!” says Nick, sitting forward in his chair. “She’s an icon.”

“That is true,” Charlie agrees, smiling. “She is pretty great.”

Nick grins wider, eyes crinkling. “Yeah, she is.”

Charlie turns away from Nick, opening the safe again to start counting their earnings. “So, your holiday plans sound pretty sparse, huh?”

“I guess so. I don’t normally do much for it anyway, since my family split up,” says Nick. His nonchalant tone hurts Charlie, sensing his reluctant acceptance of his life as it is.

Charlie knows the feeling. He hates it on Nick.

Nick, who is so bright and friendly and wonderful that everyone who knows him adores him. Nick, who can bring a smile to even the most upset children’s faces and can talk the most ignorant of mums into putting up murals just so that no kid feels left out. Nick, who gives his daughter the help and support she deserves in his classroom. Nick, who’s become the brightest spot in Charlie’s life, does not deserve to have such a lonely holiday.

“Fine, then we’ll just have to do something,” Charlie decides, keeping his eyes on the safe in front of him. He can feel heat rising in his cheeks. He dares a glance at Nick, who raises an eyebrow, arms folded.

“Is that entirely appropriate?” asks Nick.

Charlie pauses, dropping down into his chair again and looking down at his lap. “Sorry. I guess it might not be,” he murmurs, fidgeting with a loose string in his trousers.

“Oi, don’t say the ‘s’ word,” says Nick, leaning towards Charlie to get in his eyeline. He covers one of his hands on his knee, squeezing. “That wasn’t a no, Charlie.”

Charlie freezes, eyes as wide as saucers as he stares at Nick in disbelief. “Really?” he blurts.

Nick nods his head, his smile soft and the grip on Charlie’s hand getting tighter for a split second. “Of course. I really—”

“Mr. Nelson! Charlie! Can you guys come here for a sec?” Sai calls across the room, breaking the moment like shattered glass. He’s standing next to the piano, waving.

Reluctantly, Charlie and Nick abandon their station and cross over to Sai. Along with Otis and Harry, the five of them manage to get the piano out of the hall and out into the entrance hall. They swear and laugh and complain the whole time, pausing every so often to adjust and trying not to drop it. Carefully, they place it atop a transport, leaving it for one of the janitors to move later on.

“Who on earth thought it was a good idea having a piano without wheels?” says Sai as the group heads back into the hall together, shaking his hands off.

“Clearly an idiot,” Charlie adds. “They’re massive and heavy and frequently get moved around. It makes no sense.”

“Exactly what I was saying earlier!” exclaims Otis, nodding vehemently, hands tucked into the pockets of his dress trousers. “It’s just a bit inconvenient, innit?”

“You guys are such nerds,” says Harry, shaking his head and breaking off from the group with a patronising smirk.

The others exchange a glance with each other. After a beat, they burst out laughing as Harry stalks away, stinking of arrogance.

Once back inside the hall, the group separates again to help clear up in different areas. Charlie and Nick go back to their original station together to finish clearing up their table, working together in silence to unload the three tubs and put them with the others from the different tables elsewhere. When they finish that, they fold the table and carry it over to the others stacked against one of the walls, each taking an end and walking sideways to keep from crashing into anything.

More and more parents start to head off as the fundraiser set up slowly gets taken down.

Eventually, only a few tables and decorations are left. Nick offers to help Sai take down one of the ‘Winter Wonderland’ banners off the wall and Charlie steps back out of the way. Instead, he offers to help Sahar to organise the many safes from all of the stalls in the room. They take note of all the earnings written on slips on top of each safe, also labelled with the table they came from, then pop them all open to make sure the amounts line up correctly.

Charlie hops up onto the stage and props one of the safes in his lap. He counts out all the change and the bills, glancing around the room briefly. Apart from him and Sahar, only Sai, Nick, Otis, Imogen and Christian remain. Sai and Nick are folding up the banner while Imogen helps Christian with carrying the last of the tables over to the other ones and Otis double checks for any rubbish leftover to give the janitors less work.

Finally, they finish counting up and verifying and labeling all the safes. Sahar takes them away in a large box to store in the Finance Office and Charlie heads over to the others.

“See you soon, Mr. Nelson. I hope you enjoy your break,” Sai is saying to Nick when Charlie nears. When Charlie joins them, he smiles at Charlie and turns to him. “I’m just heading off now. I hope to see you again soon.”

He waves goodbye to them both and then he heads off out the doors.

Imogen looks up from her phone, reading something off the screen. “Right, Sahar has successfully dropped the safes off, so we can head off,” she says to the group, tucking her phone into her handbag. “Thank you guys again for all your help.”

“No problem!” Nick and Charlie say in unison.

Otis and Imogen share a look. “Well, anyway, we’ve got to head off. See you guys around!” cuts in Otis, tugging on Imogen’s arm. Arm in arm, they walk out together, whispering to each other.

This leaves only Charlie and Nick. Only a couple of janitors mopping at the other end of the hall remain.

“So, how are you getting home?” Nick asks, sticking his hands in his pockets.

Charlie shrugs. “I don’t actually know. I sent Tori home with my keys,” says Charlie, frowning. “I can probably just call her to come get me. Or get a taxi.”

He goes to reach into his pocket to grab his phone, but Nick knocks his hand back.

“Nonsense! I can just take you! You live right around the corner from me, remember?”

“O-okay.”

He takes Charlie by the hand and drags him off out of the assembly hall, out into the entrance hall and through the front doors. They burst out of the heat of the building and into the freezing air of December and Charlie almost gasps at the sudden change.

Charlie knows he shouldn’t do this. He knows he should deny Nick’s offer to take him home and just book a taxi or call Tori. It isn’t appropriate.

He’s Maya’s teacher, Charlie thinks. It’s too soon to fall so fast, he reminds himself.

And yet he lets Nick drag him all the way to his car. Hating himself a little, he gives Nick his address and they head off.

They drive down the road, both keeping their eyes on the road ahead. Charlie grips the door handle tightly, biting his lip. His heart is pounding against his chest and ringing in his ears, the tension between them palpable as smoke. Charlie could choke on it.

“I had fun this afternoon, you know,” Nick says after a long silence. His eyes are still firmly on the road, but he glances at Charlie out the corner of his eyes for a split second. In the occasional orange glow of the passing lamp posts, Charlie swears he sees a blush. “We worked well together, didn’t we?”

“I think we balanced each other out well,” says Charlie, keeping his gaze on the window to his left, watching the rolling hills zipping past as they drive onwards. All the other cars on the motorway are a blur of colour and light, zipping past his view. “Except for when my friends came and distracted us.”

Nick laughs, throwing his head back. “I’m still not over how we met my first kiss earlier,” says Nick, shaking his head. “Like, what are the chances?”

“Yeah, that was surprising,” says Charlie, watching as Nick pulls off the motorway and down onto regular local streets. They aren’t far from his house now. “I don’t know how you didn’t recognise the name. I’ve heard Darcy mention her hundreds of times and I’ve only met her a couple times.”

“I dunno! I guess I just never considered the possibility. It seemed too coincidental. Plus, I didn’t know she was a lesbian, either, so.” Nick shrugs, shaking his head in disbelief. “Your friends were nice, too. I’d like to get to know them better.”

“If you get past Tao, you guys would get along great! Although, Tao is a pretty hard one to get past.”

Nick shrugs, glancing up at Charlie in the rearview mirror, only for a second. But Charlie sees it nonetheless. “I think I like my chances, actually.”

“Well, then, there you go.”

“They said that you mentioned me?”

Charlie buries his face in his hands, screwing his eyes closed. “I might talk about you a lot, yes,” he admits, muffled by his hands.

“I sure hope it’s all positive stuff,” says Nick, a smirk in his voice. Charlie peeks through his fingers and confirms his suspicions.

“As if I could say anything negative about you.”

Nick stops at a red light and takes the time to look over at him for a moment, still gripping the wheel. His eyes are soft, scanning his face, lips curled up slightly to one side in a gentle smile, washed in red light from the traffic light. Charlie looks back, determined, eyes darting to Nick’s mouth for a split second and then back up to his bright brown eyes. Nick’s lips twitch at the motion of Charlie’s eyes and Charlie swears his heart leaps into his throat.

Nick breaks eye contact to continue driving when the light glows green in their faces.

The rest of the journey is silent, the air thick with energy. Charlie’s heart skips at every sound, every light, the car turning this way and that as Nick seems to take the longest possible route to his house. They drive through street after street, houses lit up with decorations and windows glowing in the darkness zooming past them as they drive. At last, Charlie’s street comes into view up ahead and the tension goes taught as a rubber band.

Nick pulls into the side a few houses down from Charlie’s.

He keeps one hand on the wheel, turning his body towards Charlie again. Charlie copies the position. Swallows a lump in his throat.

Nick watches the movement, biting his lip. His eyes are wide, pupils dilated. A few strands of hair fall into his face. Charlie reaches up and pushes them back, letting his fingers linger only a nanosecond too long. Nick closes his eyes and actually leans into the touch.

“Do you really talk to your friends about me a lot?” asks Nick. His voice is rough, just above a breath. It trickles over Charlie like honey, sticking to him, glued inside his mind. The uncertainty, the hope, the expectation in his voice, louder than anything he could possibly say aloud.

“I don’t think I’ve gone a day without mentioning you at least once since I first saw you on the playground this year,” Charlie admits, feeling bold.

He catches the way Nick inhales sharply at this last comment, dropping his hand off the steering wheel with a softened thud. In the small car, turned towards each other, there is very little space left between them anymore. His other hand rests on the centre console between them. Throwing caution to the wind and out the car, Charlie dares to put his hand next to his, linking their pinkies together.

Nick doesn’t pull away.

“I talk about you a lot, too,” Nick breathes. “My mum hears about you on all of our calls and Darcy’s always teasing me for mentioning you too often. Even Nellie gets a daily rundown. ”

“We’re such nerds,” Charlie murmurs, moving minutely closer.

“God, yeah, we are,” Nick agrees.

Charlie shifts again, tightening his hold on Nick’s finger. He shifts closer again, almost nose to nose. “Would it be really inappropriate to ask if you would kiss me?” he whispers.

“Probably,” Nick murmurs.

And then he closes the last of the gap between them.

The kiss does not last long. Nick presses forwards, tilting his head as he kisses Charlie. Charlie’s heart thunders in his ears, kissing back intently, blunt nails digging into the leather of the armrest between them. It is gentle and hesitant, careful, like neither of them is sure of what to do next. Charlie tightens his grasp on Nick’s pinkie, terrified he might just float away.

They pull apart after a few seconds, turning away from each other with matching flushed faces.

Charlie looks out the window to his side, eyes wandering over the dark gardens of the houses beside them. Lights are on in several windows, the occasional silhouette passing by and the lamppost flickering on and off above them. Nick looks ahead, reaching up to grip onto the steering wheel with his free hand, so tight his knuckles turn paper white. Now, only their pinkies still touch, Nick’s skin soft and warm where Charlie can feel it. The air between them is unsure and terrified and Charlie’s heart races, trying to leap out to Nick to burrow inside his ribcage beside his own beating heart and stay there forever.

Charlie goes to say something—to apologise, no doubt—when Nick shifts again. He flips his hand on the armrest, lacing their fingers together properly and leans across the divide between them. Charlie turns to glance at their hands and finds Nick mere centimetres from his face. He reaches his free hand up to cup Nick’s jaw and leans in to kiss him once more.

Charlie leans into this kiss more this time, tugging Nick into his space by his jaw and squeezing their joined hands. Nick uses his other hand to pull him even closer as well, until they’re as close as they can get with the stupid console still between them. Charlie ignores it, kissing Nick fervently, thumb swiping over Nick’s stubble on his jaw. Nick almost topples over the console as he dives deeper into kissing Charlie, caught up in a whirlwind of kisses.

When he opens his mouth to let Nick in, he almost gasps at the first touch of tongues, tightening his grip and shifting his hand from Nick’s jaw, down to his shoulder. He actually gasps this time, feeling the muscle underneath his grasp, toned and strong and hard, shifting with his every move. Nick laughs against his lips, the console digging into his hip bone.

They make out slowly, but more insistent this time, getting into an easy rhythm like they’re back to serving the hot drinks table together. They shift and stir against each other, hands and fingers wandering, both of them trying to get forever closer to one another, to fill every empty space between them, to slot together like the last pieces of an elaborate puzzle. Nick’s hand moves to grip Charlie’s thigh and Charlie’s fingers tangle in Nick’s hair and they kiss and kiss and kiss. They push and pull in the small space of the car, two hearts racing as one, the rubber band of tension snapping with every new movement they share between them.

And then Nick’s elbow bumps into the horn.

They leap apart as the sound of the horn blasts through the silence of the night.

Charlie looks around the car, startled by the horn. The windows have fogged slightly and he’s sure it’s gotten darker since they last arrived. He turns to Nick.

Both breathing heavily, they exchange one look with each other before they both break into fits of quiet laughter. Nick clutches his stomach, bending over as he laughs silently, hair falling into his face. A laugh bubbles up from Charlie’s chest and he keeps on laughing until he has tears in his eyes. Nick leans into him, still laughing at the absurdity of the situation.

“Oh, my God. Why are we like this?” Charlie blurts in between laughs, clutching the fabric of Nick’s shirt and wiping the tears of joy from his eyes.

Nick snorts, turning and leaning their foreheads together, eyes shut as he laughs to himself. Charlie’s laughs slow as he presses their heads together, a smile still left on his face. “I can’t believe we just did that,” Nick breathes.

“Which part? The kissing or the horn?”

“Both?” Nick pulls back a little, looking into Charlie’s eyes. The uncertainty is back, his eyes scanning Charlie’s entire face. Charlie swallows, holding his breath and waiting for the other foot to drop on top of him. “I’ve wanted to do that for ages. I can’t believe it actually happened.”

Well, that was not what Charlie was expecting. At all.

The apology on the tip of his tongue fizzles away with surprise. “Really?” Charlie can’t help but ask instead, holding Nick’s eye contact.

Nick shuts his eyes and nods his head once, twice. “I thought it was obvious,” he whispers. “I’ve been crushing on you ever since we met at that parents’ evening and I’ve been absolutely kicking myself for liking one of my students’ parents.”

“To be honest, I thought I was the one being pathetically obvious,” Charlie says, drawing vague shapes in the fogged up glass with the tip of his finger. Suddenly, it all feels too real. “Ever since I saw you at the playground, the first day I came to collect Maya from school, I was stupidly obsessed with you.”

“Were you actually?” Nick grins, leaning towards Charlie and wiggling his eyebrows.

Blushing furiously, Charlie pushes Nick back by his face, rolling his eyes. “My friends were convinced you were straight and just leading me on, actually. So I thought I was a goner.”

Nick leans back at this, shaking himself off, eyebrows raised up high. He blinks a few times. “Wait, really? You thought I was straight?” he says, looking baffled. Charlie’s face flushes again, but he nods sheepishly. Nick snorts a laugh, slapping himself on the forehead. “Charlie, I have a bisexual pride pin on my blazer for work and there’s multiple pride flags hanging up in my fucking classroom. Did you seriously think I was a heterosexual?” He points a finger sharply at his blazer where, even in the pale light of the evening, Charlie spots the now stupidly obvious pink, purple and blue pin attached to the collar. He has no idea how he never spotted it before.

“Well, to be fair you don’t exactly wear your blazer a lot. You’ve usually got it discarded on the floor or a chair somewhere!”

“Yeah, because my classroom gets stupidly warm and it’s hard to play outside with the kids with a tight fitting blazer!” Nick explains, shaking his head. “I’m actually offended you thought I was straight.”

“Only at first! And it was my friends who convinced me!” Charlie says defensively.

“I’m going to have to start wearing a full on bi pride flag like a cape now, aren’t I?” Nick teases, poking Charlie’s shoulder.

“Now that would be quite the sight,” says Charlie, beaming. He pictures it in his mind, Nick standing tall with his hands on his hips and a pink, purple and blue flag waving magnificently over his shoulder like a superhero. Next, his mind conjures up an image of the two of them, adorning their own flag-capes, standing hand in hand like a superhero duo. Charlie erases it from his mind almost as soon as it forms.

He glances at Nick, looking back at him with so much care and devotion it hurts. He looks at the clock on Nick’s dashboard and sighs. It’s well past Maya’s bedtime. The reminder of where he is and how they know each other hangs over him suddenly like the sword of Damocles and Charlie can actually feel himself shutting down.

“I should go,” Charlie murmurs, looking away and undoing his seatbelt. “Thanks again for driving me home.”

Nick opens his mouth to say something, but Charlie has already hopped out onto the curb. Without looking back, he practically speedwalks the rest of the way to his house, a thousand emotions threatening to knock him off his feet.

Chapter Text

Charlie avoids Nick the following day when he picks up Maya and Timothy. When Nick tries messaging him, he leaves him on read every time, his heart aching more with every message. He doesn’t linger at the gates or say hello to Nick when he spots him across the playground with another teacher, he doesn’t wander over to speak to him at the fence while he waits for Maya to notice him and he doesn’t even wave to him even when he hears Nick call his name. Instead, he keeps his head down and calls Maya’s and Timothy’s names, staring holes into his Oxfords as he waits outside the fence.

Maya jogs over to greet him, backpack bouncing on her back, holding up a piece of paper. She bumps into him, beaming and holding up the paper for Charlie to see. He takes it gently and glances down at it.

It’s a letter. A letter written from the point of view of an archeologist, writing about a dinosaur fossil they found, detailing the basic anatomy of the dinosaur and about the search. At the top of the letter, right next to a big red ‘A’, Nick has attached a sticker with a smiling snowman on the front, along with a note telling her how well she did.

“That’s amazing, sweetheart!” Charlie exclaims. “What a great way to start the holiday.”

Timothy, jogging to keep up with Maya, lurches to a stop next to them. “I got a good grade, too, Mr. Spring!” he exclaims, pointing at Maya’s letter in Charlie’s hand.

“But not as good as me,” says Maya, standing up straight with a smile. Charlie rolls his eyes and tells her off for being cocky.

He takes her hand in his free one, still holding the ‘letter’ as he leads them over to the car. He chances a glance over his shoulder, just in time to see Nick looking in their direction.

His face has pulled into a sad, pained expression which only gets worse when Charlie doesn’t return his small wave.

Charlie buckles Maya and then Timothy in the back seat and forces himself not to think about it.

The thing is, Charlie sort of regrets the kiss last night. He knows it was irresponsible and inappropriate to kiss Maya’s teacher and he knows that it was a stupid thing to do right outside his house where anyone could see them. He should have just pushed his feelings aside and told Nick to keep his distance, instead of flirting with him all evening and asking him to kiss him in the twilight. He knows he hurt Nick today, ignoring him after their kiss, but he can’t take any of it back.

His chest had a permanent fist clenched around it the whole day, tightening the closer he got to seeing Nick until his throat was almost closed up. He keeps playing the kisses over and over in his mind, repeating it until it’s tattooed onto the backs of his eyes every time he blinks, seared right into his skull and seeping through the folds of his brain. His stomach twists with guilt and regret, thinking constantly about his husband he feels he’s letting down.

Charlie’s husband got sick when Maya was 2 and a half. Cancer. It took him a while to become noticeably sick, his walking getting slower and slower and his coughs and wheezes getting louder and more frequent. Eventually, Charlie had to put their bed into storage so that they could install a hospital bed in their room while Charlie slept on the couch most nights if he wasn’t sneaking into Maya’s room to sleep on her carpet. He had to take time off work, staying home to take care of both Maya and her dad and losing sleep from waking up with a crick on his neck or struggling to fall asleep for the fear of either of them getting hurt in the night.

Soon, he relapsed in his eating disorder and it only got worse from there. He couldn’t sleep more than 2 hours a night and he lost even more weight than his dying husband. He put on a smile for his little girl, putting in extra effort to make her feel loved, taking her to the park and the library and out for walks, trying to make up for the lost time spent in and out of hospital. He got her a cat to keep her company when neither of her parents were able to play with her as much and half-spoiled her with crafts and books and games, hoping she wouldn’t notice how both her parents were falling apart in front of her.

One day, while out shopping with Tao and Elle, he fainted from not having eaten or slept for multiple days in a row. After that, he agreed to bring a hospice nurse in to help him and slowly started to get a bit better. A lot of that progress was shattered once again when he lost his husband, but even after that, he started to get better slowly, bit by bit.

He went back to his therapist and worked hard to try to get back on his feet with the support of his friends and family and therapist. When Maya started acting out in school, running away and getting worse and worse marks, he signed her up to speak to someone as well and they both started attending a family therapist to try to work through their grief together. He watched as Maya went from being buried inside her 5 year old mind, back to her cheerful, talkative self as the time went on and they both started picking up the pieces.

Now, just under a year and a half after losing what he thought was the love of his life, Charlie could feel himself falling fast for Nick. He was falling truly, madly, deeply, foolishing into him. He popped up in most of his dreams and he was usually the first and last thought of the day (aside from Maya) and he constantly found himself waiting for the next time he could see him. Nick was slowly becoming a part of his daily routine.

And he hated himself for it.

Obviously he knew it wasn’t unheard of to fall in love not long after losing a partner, but it still felt too soon. It felt like abandonment. He spent over 3 years terrified about losing his husband and barely a year after he actually did, he was suddenly fantasising about a completely different man.

And so, he avoided Nick the next day after the kiss. He couldn’t allow himself that little indulgence of the day, speaking to Nick. He broke his own heart with every second of the day, building his walls up higher and higher. He wasn’t ‘worthy’ of that kind of love again just yet.

Perhaps he might never allow himself that love again.

~~~

The first week of the holiday, Charlie is mostly miserable. Despite having the week off for once and having time with both his daughter and his sister and her fiance, he spends the whole time like a ghost going through the motions. He plays with Maya in the garden when they wake up with more snow on Sunday and they all go out to see a movie which he doesn’t pay any attention to and he goes gift shopping with Isaac, Tao and Elle while Tori and Michael watch Maya. But none of it brings him much joy.

Not even on Christmas when Maya wakes them all up at 7 in the morning, desperate to open her presents and stocking, does Charlie have much more fun. He opens his presents from his friends and phones all his friends to thank them for their gifts and they sit down for Christmas dinner he made with Michael. His mum texts him in the afternoon with a simple “Merry Christmas” text and his dad Facetimes them for a bit, but Charlie can feel the tension between him and Tori the entire time, both waiting for the call to end.

Sure, he has a bit more fun, the festivities cheering him up seeing everyone else having fun and joining in with the singing and the chatter and the games, but it’s not enough. Not even Maya’s big grin when she opens her presents by the tree is enough to bring a smile that actually reaches his eyes.

On Boxing Day, after the whole house has a lie in before lazing around the house (and playing with her new gifts, in Maya’s case), all their friends come over to order takeaway and watch a bunch of Christmas movies, even though Tao and Tori hate them.

Maya falls asleep halfway through The Holiday, but she somehow sleeps through everyone around her talking. Tao and Michael then argue about watching Die Hard around the holidays and Elle drags Tori into a conversation about Star Wars. While Isaac watches the rest of the movie with his knees pulled up to his shoulder, Charlie just watches everyone else in silence, not bringing himself to join in any of their merrymaking.

The romcom finishes up and for a few minutes, everyone talks to each other about the plot, Elle and Michael wiping the tears from their eyes after the heartwarming ending. Tao somehow manages to talk everyone into watching Die Hard, so Tori gets up from her spot on the couch, jostling Isaac on her way past.

“Right, I think everyone is in need of another Bailey’s hot chocolate,” she announces to the room. “Charlie, come help me. You’re the host, after all.”

Charlie hums in acknowledgement and follows her into the kitchen, carrying half the mugs she didn’t grab herself. He sets them on the counter and leans against the cabinet, watching Tori grabbing milk and Bailey’s from the fridge and popping the kettle on.

“So, what’s bothering you?” Tori asks, leaning against the counter across from him. She puts her hands on her hips, waiting.

“What do you mean? I’m fine,” says Charlie far too quickly. “I’m having a great time.” He even puts on a wide, toothy smile, but they both know it doesn’t even reach his eyes and looks closer to a grimace of pain than a genuine, happy grin.

Tori rolls her eyes. “Oh, cut it with that bullshit,” she snaps, leaning across the space between them to poke him in the ribs. Charlie yelps, dodging out of the way and scowling at her. “I know something’s up. You’ve been quiet all week and hardly finished your chicken tikka. Even Isaac’s said more than you. Hell, I’ve said more. What the fuck is going on?”

“I’m just tired. Maya had me up at 7 yesterday and I didn’t get to bed until—”

“For fuck’s sake, Charlie. I’ve known you your whole life. You can’t hide that you’re obviously upset about something.” She pokes him again and then moves to grab the kettle as it finishes boiling. “So, go on. Spill.”

Charlie buries his face in his hands. “It’s about Nick,” he mumbles, peeking between his fingers.

“I figured as much.”

He drops his hands and moves over to Tori, grabbing her shoulders and spinning her around until she’s facing him, holding the kettle up between them. “Look, you can’t tell anyone this, but… Nick and I kissed after the fundraiser,” he blurts at a whisper.

Her eyebrows shoot up into her straight fringe. “Wow. Good for you,” she says in a monotone, which is just about as much emotion as he’ll get. “I didn’t think you had it in you.”

“Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence,” Charlie murmurs, folding his arms over his chest.

“So, you finally kissed the guy you’ve been pining for for months. Isn’t that a good thing?”

“No!” Charlie shrieks. The chatter on the other side of the door pauses for a moment at his outburst. Quieter, Charlie continues, “Not really. He’s Maya’s teacher and we’re on the PTA together. It’s inappropriate! And—”

Charlie bursts into tears.

He rolls down the side of the counter and sits on the floor, knees hugged to his chest. Tori sets the kettle aside and kneels down beside him, putting a hand on his knee, blue eyes softened with concern. She squeezes his knee and he sniffles, tears bubbling in his eyes, waiting to pour.

“It’s too soon, Tori. I—I can’t. It hasn’t even been two years yet and—and it feels like I’m leaving my own husband behind,” he cries, voice shaking violently.

“Oh, Charlie,” Tori murmurs, pulling him into a hug, tucking her knees under herself and rubbing a hand up and down his arm. “It’s okay. You’re not abandoning him by falling for someone new.”

“But I am! I’m actually falling in love with Nick and it’s not even been that long. It’s like—like I can’t even love right.”

Tori shakes her head, tucking her chin on his shoulder. “Just because you love someone else doesn’t take away the love that you already had. Just because Maya came around and you started loving her doesn’t mean you lost any love for her dad, just like I know you didn’t lose any love for me when you got friends,” she says. She sits back, looking him in the eyes. “You’ve got an absurd amount of love in you, Charlie. Loving Nick won’t change that. You don’t love any of us less by loving Nick. It just means… you just have even more love to give. Don’t ever say you can’t love right because you have more love in you than anyone else I know.”

Charlie sniffles, wiping his face with the sleeve of his jumper. “That was really cheesy,” he laughs wetly. Tori rolls her eyes again, but doesn’t deny it. “But thanks. I’ll think about it.”

He reaches up to the counter over his head and uses it to pull himself to his feet. Then, he reaches out to help Tori up. In silence, they make their friends their cups of spiked hot chocolate and then slowly carry them into the living room to give out. Maya, curled up like a cat on the floor, stirs as Tori and Charlie return with the drinks, sleepily mumbling for Charlie.

As the opening shot of Die Hard comes on screen, Charlie curls up on the arm chair, holding the mug up under his chin, letting the steam float up into his face, cupping the mug in both hands. Careful not to spill his drink, he pulls Maya onto his lap, allowing her to curl up, falling asleep again within seconds.

He blows on the top and glances around the room.

Tao and Elle squeeze together on one side of the couch together while Michael sits at the other end, the bowl of popcorn next to him and Tori and Isaac sit next to each other on the floor. Maya sleeps heavily on his chest, her chin digging into his chest and her breath tickling his face as she clutches onto the fabric of his shirt. Everyone looks content, watching the film, whispering to their neighbour and enjoying their warm drinks.

Charlie catches Tori’s eye and they share a small, private smile.

He still feels uncertain about Nick even after their chat, but looking around at all the people he loves, Charlie feels a spot of hope blooming in his chest that maybe Tori is right.

~~~

On the 30th of December, a day after Michael and Tori head home, leaving behind a quiet and solemn house, Charlie gets an unexpected text.

He’s in the middle of cleaning the dishes after breakfast, humming to the gentle indie music playing on his speaker, elbow deep in suds. Maya sits on the kitchen counter, legs swinging this way and that, rambling on about her new favourite film for the third time that morning. Tibby the cat sits on the table, tail flicking back and forth as he watches Charlie at the sink. The snow has begun to melt outside, bringing with it grey and brown sludge that leaves every outdoor surface covered in dirt, the windows smudged with grey, much to Charlie’s dismay. With every swipe of his sponge or splatter of washing up liquid, Charlie ignores the weight of the last few days on his shoulders.

“Daddy, can we watch it again tonight?” asks Maya, leaning towards Charlie. He glances at her out of the corner of his eye as she makes her eyes big and round like a puppy.

She should know by now that even though they’ve watched Paddington 2 five times since the winter break began, he’ll still indulge her anyway. He heaves a sigh and sets a plate to the side, giving her a falsely annoyed look. “Fine, if we have to,” he says dramatically, pressing the back of his gloved hand to his forehead.

Maya giggles with delight, clapping her hands together. Charlie huffs a laugh, shaking his head and grabbing a handtowel to wipe the suds off his face. He returns to washing up a moment later and Maya continues on with her speech about her favourite scenes from the movie.

And then his phone chimes on the counter. Charlie jumps in surprise, neck snapping in his phone’s direction. He frantically sets the half-clean pan to the side and dries his hands on the nearest towel before diving across to grab the phone. He can hear Maya giggling at the sight, but he ignores her and unlocks his phone to see the notification:

Message from: Imogen Smith-Heaney.

Eyebrows furrowed, trying to hide his disappointment that it’s not Nick messaging him, Charlie opens the message.

Imogen: Hey, Charlie! I know it’s super last minute but a few of us from the PTA are having a New Year’s Eve party tomorrow night and I was wondering if you’d like to join! You can bring Maya as well and she can hang out with the other kids coming! Timothy will be there, too. xx

Before Charlie can even begin to respond, another message pops up:

Imogen: It’s fine if you can’t make it if you’ve got plans, but I thought I should ask you. xx

And then immediately after:

Imogen: Nick Nelson will be there, too ;) xx

Well, now Charlie has no choice but to go.

Unfortunately, he already made plans with his friends for New Years Eve. Elle and Tao were going to have everyone over for a late dinner and then wait up for the countdown and following fireworks showcase, hopefully getting copiously drunk. It’s tradition.

But Charlie desperately wants to see Nick again. He hates this space between them built since the kiss, Charlie’s walls growing desperately higher as he tries to process falling in love so soon after losing his husband to cancer. But no matter how many times his fingers linger over Nick’s name in his phone, he still feels that messaging him after all this time would never be enough. It feels inappropriate to have such a difficult, intense conversation over text message.

He just has to talk to him in person. Surely his friends will understand. They have to.

Tao picks up the phone after only 3 rings.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“Hey, Tao,” says Charlie, pacing in the living room. “Listen, you’re not going to be happy about this, but I’m gonna have to cancel on coming to yours for New Years Eve this year.”

“What?! Why?!” Tao practically screams into the phone, his voice going shrill. Charlie winces, holding the phone farther from his ear. “Maya’s not sick, is she? Or are you sick? What’s wrong? It’s tradition!”

Charlie covers his face with one hand, grimacing. “No, no, it’s not that. I know it’s tradition and all, but…” Charlie heaves a deep breath, bracing himself for the onslaught he knows Tao will give him when he tells him the real reason. “I sort of got invited to a PTA hosted New Years Eve party instead and apparently Nick is going, so I—”

“Oh, well if Nick Nelson is going, fuck traditions, right?” Tao interrupts harshly. “Seriously, Charlie? You’re cancelling for the chance to see the man you see almost every day at Maya’s school?”

“No, it’s not like that!” Charlie cries, panic rising in his chest. “Look, something happened with Nick at the fundraiser and it’s been really weird ever since and I need to fix it between us. I have to talk to him, but I can’t do it over the phone.”

“What happened with Nick after the fundraiser?” asks Tao, thankfully lowering his volume slightly. Charlie still can hear the skepticism and he imagines the narrowed eyes of suspicion he’s grown used to after years of friendship. “It can’t be that bad that you can’t just text or call him and then go to ours.”

“I—it’s complicated, okay?” Charlie murmurs, mussing up his hair stressfully. “I’ll make it up to you, okay? I promise. I just—I have to speak to Nick face to face, Tao. I have to.”

“But at a PTA New Years party? Seriously?”

Charlie chuckles at that, rolling his eyes. “I know it sounds silly, but, I mean, maybe it’ll be fun! I like most of the PTA parents and stuff and—”

“Fine. Go to your stupid parents party and fix stuff with your teacher crush. It’s not like we’ve been doing this for years or anything,” Tao retorts, cutting Charlie off. His voice is sharp as a knife, making Charlie’s eyes well up with tears at his tone. “I’ll see you in the New Year.”

And then he hangs up.

Charlie hiccoughs, dropping into his armchair as he begins to tear up. He sniffles, wiping his eyes before he can let any tears fall for real. His lip wobbles and his head and his heart hurt, Tao’s harsh words rolling over in his head, a mocking tape recording playing on repeat. He stares at the wooden floor, fidgeting with the sleeves of his jumper as he tries not to cry over an argument with one of his best friends.

Maya must hear him, because she shuffles in a few minutes later, hugging one of her stuffed animals—a giant green frog Isaac got for her birthday a couple years ago—to her chest.

“What’s wrong, Daddy?” she asks, coming over to him with a pout.

Charlie sniffs, wiping more tears away and forcing a smile for Maya. “Nothing’s wrong, bug. I’m just being silly,” he replies, opening his arms to allow her to climb up on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her face in his collar.

“Why are you crying, Daddy?” she asks, her voice muffled in the fabric of his jumper.

“Just something sad on my phone,” he replies, reasoning with himself that it isn’t technically a lie. He shifts her around until she sits sideways on his lap, draping her legs over the armrest, still clutching her frog as he holds her to his chest. “Listen, we’ve had a change of plans for new years tomorrow. We’re not going to Auntie Elle and Uncle Tao’s tomorrow.”

“We’re not?”

He shakes his head. “Not this time. We’ve been invited by Mrs. Smith-Heaney instead. There’ll be other kids from your school there and even Mr. Nelson has been invited to go,” he explains.

“Really?” she exclaims, growing on the idea. “Will any of my friends from school be there?”

“Well, I don’t know everyone that’s going, but you’re friends with Timothy and he’ll be there,” he says.

Maya nods into her frog. “He’s kind of messy,” she says. “But he’s funny. And his mum and dad are nice when they take me to school. Even if he is a mess.”

Charlie laughs, throwing his head back. Sometimes, she really reminds him of himself. He doesn’t know if that’s always a good thing, but he supposes it’s a plus side to not being biologically related to her.

“Just don’t let him spill anything on you and I’m sure you’ll be fine,” Charlie jokes, poking her in the ribs until she laughs. “And I’m sure even if you don’t know any of the other kids, you’ll make friends fast! Plus, I’m sure it’ll be a nice change to spend time with kids your own age instead of being stuck with me and all of my old friends.”

“Will you still let me have a sip of your drink before midnight? Like you promised?” she asks.

“Yeah, alright. If you’re good.”

Chapter Text

Before the party the next evening, Charlie stands in front of his bedroom mirror for over an hour, trying to pick an outfit. He changes four different times, dissatisfied with his choice every time. His room is a mess of clothes scattered around the floor and bed, all his drawers and closet doors thrown open in his search for the perfect outfit.

With barely any time left before their taxi is due to leave, Maya traipses into his room, already dressed and ready to go. She freezes in the doorway when she sees the mess of the room, a complete rarity in this house, which is normally spotless.

“Daddy? What are you doing?” she asks, hovering by the door, holding onto the handle with a frown.

Charlie, sitting on the floor in front of his mirror, turns around to look at her over his shoulder. She’s dressed in the silvery pink dress Elle got her, holding her light up trainers in her other hand. Charlie hates the worried look on her face.

“I can’t decide what to wear,” he admits, giving a meek breath of a laugh.

“But you already look nice,” says Maya, tilting her head in confusion. She drops her shoes at the door and walks over to him, sitting cross legged beside him in front of the mirror. “Don’t be sad, Daddy. You said the party will be fun. You can’t be sad before a fun party.”

Charlie chuckles again, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and looking at them both in the mirror, sitting side by side on the carpet. He sees her father in her so much, her dark hair pushed back from her face and her big brown doe eyes looking into his in the mirror. It aches to look at her sometimes, especially in moments like this.

“I guess you’re right, bug,” he says, bending to kiss the crown of her head. “You really think this outfit is good enough?”

Maya leans back from him and looks him up and down, eyes narrowed in scrutiny. “I like your red shirt better,” she says, getting to her feet. “Put that one on.”

And with that, she picks up her shoes and leaves him alone again. Charlie can’t help but laugh at his daughter. He gets up and pulls the red shirt in question on instead, then quickly cleans his room before the taxi arrives.

He’s just folding his last shirt and tucking it in his chest of drawers when the taxi driver arrives, phoning him. Charlie picks up and tells them he’ll be right outside, then he grabs a pair of nice converse and calls for Maya to hurry up.

She’s already waiting at the bottom of the stairs, dressed in her trainers and her purple winter coat over her dress, arms folded. Charlie chuckles at the sight and jogs down the steps, quickly pulling his shoes on, grabbing his coat and following her to the door. Maya rushes to the car while he locks the door and sets the alarm, then goes to join her.

The party is hosted at Elizabeth and Harry Greene’s house, according to the address Imogen sent him. When the taxi pulls up to it just twenty minutes later, Charlie’s jaw actually drops open.

It’s massive. Right at the end of the most expensive part of town, it has a huge front lawn with perfectly manicured turf, a driveway leading up to a double car garage with a literal locked gate around it. Through the bars, Charlie can just make out its multiple stories and its sloping roof and ivy-covered bricks. The taxi driver is forced to drop them just outside the gate, giving them both a strange look as he says goodbye and drives off.

“I guess we just ring the buzzer?” Charlie suggests, moving over to the gate where a big intercom system has been set. Maya raises her arms in a big shrug, making an ‘I-don’t-know’ sound. Charlie pushes the button, jumping at the shrill buzzing noise it makes.

A voice from the intercom speaks, sounding vaguely familiar. “Hello?”

“Er, it’s Charlie Spring, here for the party?” Charlie states, giving Maya a raised eyebrow. “I hope this is the right address.”

“Oh, Charlie! You made it!” the voice exclaims.

A second later, the buzzer sounds again and the gates creep open. Charlie takes Maya’s hand and they walk up the long drive together to the house. The door swings open before they get there, revealing Sahar, dressed in a nice green dress and her hair pushed back by a headband.

“Hello! Come on in!”

Inside, it is just as massive as it is on the outside. In the entrance, there stands a large staircase, splitting off in two directions at the top, leading to a balcony wrapping around the top and leading to two separate hallways. Downstairs, there’s a formal sitting area to one side and a dining room with a long, posh dining table set with leather chairs on the other. All the walls are pure white and minimalist, the whole design reminding Charlie of a sterile, expensive hotel.

Past the staircase, Sahar takes their coats off them and leads the way to the rest of the house where all the guests are gathered, scattered around, talking and laughing together.

It’s an open concept, high ceilinged room with a modern kitchen with marble countertops and expensive, well, everything. Then, there’s a bunch of big leather couches around a big stone fireplace, splitting up two massive windows on one side and a glittering chandelier hanging overhead. Someone has colourful, neon spotlights set around the room, catching in the glittering chandelier and bouncing on every single surface. The colours almost seem inappropriate in the otherwise whitewashed house. There’s another door leading off to a conservatory and yet another door leading to yet another part of the house Charlie can’t even imagine.

“Hey, Charlie. I didn’t know you were coming, too.” Sai suddenly appears from the kitchen, holding a glass of champagne. “Is this your daughter?” he looks down at Maya, who hides behind Charlie.

“Er, yeah, hi. This is Maya,” he says, gently pushing Maya in front of him. “Maya, say hi to Mr. Verma. He’s Hasini’s dad.”

“Yeah, she’s here as well,” says Sai, smiling gently. “Here, I’ll show you guys where all the kids are hanging out.”

Sai leads them to the other side of the house, down a long corridor, passing various family portraits and abstract paintings hung on the walls. At the end of the hall, Sai creeps open a door and a flood of kids' voices comes out.

On the other side of the door, at least a dozen kids are scattered on couches and bean bags and blankets laid out on the floor. It seems to be some kind of tv room with a huge flatscreen tv currently playing a Disney movie, filled with multiple shiny black leather couches with cup holders and everything. There’s a mini fridge in one corner and a tiny bar next to it, stocked with alcohol, which has a padlock on the front.

Once Maya spots a couple friends, Hasini and Timothy and Hope, Charlie and Sai leave them alone and head back to join the other adults. Sai wanders off again when his wife summons him and Charlie goes to the kitchen area in search of a drink of sorts. Music plays in hidden speakers, some electronic rap from their childhood, pulsing in Charlie’s ears and swallowing the noise of the flatscreen television in the corner, playing one of those countdown showcases.

Charlie finds an open bottle of champagne and some clean glasses and helps himself to a glass, careful not to overpour it. He looks around the room for a familiar face, waving hello to Tara and Darcy where they’re dancing together on the other side of the room. When he looks to another side of the massive room, however, he almost drops his drink on the floor.

Across the room, a grinning Nick Nelson goes to hug Imogen, saying something to her before pulling back. He’s holding a bottle of beer at his side, dressed in tailored beige trousers and a fitted blue button down top with the sleeves rolled to the elbows, his hair swept back from his face as he bops casually to the music and chats with Imogen.

As if sensing Charlie’s gaze, he turns towards Charlie, stopping dead.

Charlie downs the last of his drink and pours himself another generous glassful. He raises his glass to Nick, giving him a small smile. Nick lifts his own drink in a half-hearted salute, but doesn’t return the smile. He turns back to Imogen and whispers something to her before—to Charlie’s mild horror—he starts heading over to Charlie.

He stops just in front of Charlie, who moves away from the kitchen counter, clutching his drink to his chest in trembling hands.

“Hi,” says Nick.

“Hi,” Charlie replies.

“What’re you doing here?” Nick asks. Charlie flinches, trying not to let the comment sting, but failing miserably.

He’s never seen Nick like this. His shoulders are bunched up to his chin, his expression guarded and closed off, his drink clenched in one hand while the other balls into a fist. Charlie swallows under Nick’s intense gaze, fearful he might actually get hit in the face in a moment with Nick looking so fiercely at him. It feels so out of character to the gentle, friendly Nick Charlie has grown accustomed to in the last few months.

“Imogen invited me. Us. Maya’s here, too,” Charlie babbles, face growing warm. He can already sense he’s mucking this conversation up.

“Right.” Nick’s voice is blunt and curt, avoiding Charlie’s eyes.

Charlie supposes he deserves it, but it still hurts.

“So, how’s your break? Are you, er, enjoying it?” Charlie asks, bouncing up and down on his heels, taking a sip of his drink to give his hands something to do.

Nick scoffs, rolling his eyes. Charlie takes a step back, blinking, wounded. “Don’t. Don’t do that,” Nick grits out, tightening his grip on his drink, jaw tight with his clenched teeth. His eyes flash with something akin to pain.

“Do what?”

“That! Act like—like everything’s normal!” Nick blurts, throwing one hand up towards him, exasperated.

Several people nearby turn in their direction, curious at Nick’s outburst.

“W-what do you mean?” Charlie stammers. Charlie takes another step away from Nick, eyes going wider and wider, burning from tears waiting to be shed. Nick watches this motion and Charlie notices his body soften ever so slightly, like he recognises Charlie’s walls going up with his tone.

Nick throws a look around the room, at the eavesdroppers and people pretending to be talking, though their gazes keep drifting to Nick and Charlie clearly arguing. He huffs, grabs Charlie’s free hand and yanks him out of the room, down the hall and into the front sitting room. As soon as they arrive, he drops Charlie’s hand and spins to face him, frowning.

“You kissed me, remember? You flirted with me for weeks and then you fucking kissed me and then you just—” Nick flaps his hand around, looking for the word. “—avoided me. And please, please don’t try to act like you didn’t because I know you did. I’m not a fucking idiot. I know when I’m being ignored. I dare you to tell me I’m wrong. I’m right, aren’t I?”

Charlie releases a heavy breath, biting his lip. He closes his eyes, nodding.

Nick sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Why? Why did you avoid me, Charlie?” Nick asks, his voice breaking, eyes welling up with tears. He sets his drink to the side, placing it on a coaster on a very expensive looking coffee table. “I’ve been out of my mind ever since it happened, Charlie! I’ve been having some sort of crisis the entire time, kicking myself for liking you and then the moment you make it clear you might like me, you suddenly fuck off into the ether like it didn’t happen! Do you know how frustrating it’s been? How fucking confusing it’s been?”

“Nick.” Charlie takes a step towards Nick, but he steps back again, still rambling.

“You’ve been flirting with me for weeks and weeks and then you go and kiss me and turn around and avoid me like you’re embarrassed or disgusted or something!” Nick continues, throwing his hands in the air. “Maybe you had your reasons or you regretted it or something, but I thought—I thought I mattered enough to you to at least get some explanation. If you don’t want anything to do with me anymore, I respect your decision, but it hurts me that you—you left me hanging, Charlie.”

Nick steps farther from Charlie again, shoulders drooping and his head hanging. He glances back at Charlie. “Did I do something wrong?” Nick asks, his voice breaking at the end. His eyes are bloodshot in the dim light of the sitting room and despite his height, Charlie has never seen Nick look so small. All the anger has dissipated from the other man, replaced only with a hollow, heartbroken desperation.

“Nick.” Charlie steps closer and clutches the lapels of Nick’s shirt. Nick stiffens, but doesn’t move away. “I was—guilty. About what I did,” he admits, looking up into his eyes with earnestness. Nick frowns deeper, opening his mouth again. Charlie shakes his head, cupping both of Nick’s cheeks and silencing him. “Listen to me. Please, I can explain.”

“Okay...”

“So, as I mentioned a while back, my husband died really early in Maya’s first year, right?” he starts. Nick hums, head bobbing. “And when I met you, it was only just after the first anniversary. Hell, it’s still not even been that much longer since then. And since getting to know you recently, I’ve just fallen deeper and deeper for you. And when we kissed? That was probably the happiest I’ve felt since he died.

“But with that came the guilt. The guilt that I was leaving my late husband behind by falling for you so soon and that I was moving too fast. I was fucking terrified, Nick.” He drops his hand from Nick’s face and takes a long sip of his champagne, preparing himself. “After Maya’s dad died, I thought I would never find that kind of love again or ever feel happy anymore. I was a wreck. I lost tons more weight and I struggled to even get Maya to school some days so she had to start staying at my fucking friends’ houses when I couldn’t even take care of myself never mind my own daughter. I thought I would never get over that hurdle.

“But when I was just barely back on my feet again, you came into my life and swept me off my feet again with your stupid, perfect hair and your annoyingly beautiful grin and your muscular arms that make your shirts stretch obscenely and just everything about you.” Nick eyes his own arms, a smirk playing on his lips and Charlie rolls his eyes, flicking one of his arms. “You were just too good to be true. And with my husband gone for barely a year, it felt too soon to have something so good. I didn’t think I deserved it. But then my sister Tori made me realise that… just because I want to make room for you, it doesn’t mean I have to lose anyone else to make space.”

When he finally finishes, Charlie lets out a big breath, suddenly exhausted. He doesn’t think he has ever said that much in a week nevermind all at once. But he knows that if he didn’t say it all now, he might never get the courage to say it again. If Nick decides that he’s going to give up on him after all this, Charlie needs to get it off his chest or he knows he’ll never get the chance again. He wouldn’t blame Nick for wanting to step back after everything he’s put him through, but he needs him to know the truth now.

Perhaps he’s getting his resolutions in early.

Charlie peeks up at Nick through his eyelashes, waiting for a response. For a long moment, Nick just stands there, eyes roving over his face. Then, without warning, he wraps his arms around Charlie and almost topples them both over in a fierce hug. Charlie knows he spills a bit of his drink on the carpet, but he can’t bring himself to care.

Fuck the Greenes’ minimalist carpet, Charlie thinks.

When they pull apart again, Nick has the biggest smile Charlie has ever seen, his eyes crinkled so they almost close, hands gripping tight to Charlie’s shoulders. He looks like one of those baby angels inside churches, so happy and rosy cheeked from the alcohol in his system. Charlie longs to kiss every part of his face. He’s dizzy with the complete 180 from moments before.

“I completely understand,” says Nick. “I had no idea you were carrying so much guilt about your husband because of me. I’m so sorry I made you feel that way, even accidentally.”

“Hey, don’t apologise!” Charlie bursts out. “It’s entirely on me that I felt that way. It was my own problem that I made you feel like this before. You never did anything wrong.”

“But I just yelled at you over avoiding me when you were just upset about your late husband,” says Nick, shaking his head. “I should have thought—”

Charlie silences Nick with a finger on his lips. Nick blinks, going cross-eyed as he peers down at Charlie’s finger. “You have nothing to apologise for. You had every right to feel hurt that I ignored you like I did and left you with no explanation,” Charlie insists.

Nick smiles at the floor and then back up at Charlie, through his lashes. “But still,” he says. He steps forward again, their toes touching now. “I really like you, Charlie. Like, an insane amount. I think about you all the time and ever since we kissed, I’ve spent literal hours waiting for you to message me or trying to keep myself from messaging you first. But we can take this as slow as you like, even if it takes months. I’d hate to make you feel as if I’m stealing you away from your late husband or something.”

“I’m sorry for upsetting you when I avoided you,” says Charlie, thumbing a button on Nick’s shirt. “I felt awful doing it, even then. If anyone should apologise, it’s me.”

“You have nothing to apologise for, Charlie,” Nick insists again, shaking him a tiny bit in his desperation. “I understand. And I’ll always be here to go at your pace, no matter the speed.”

Charlie grins, casually sliding his hand off the button of Nick’s shirt and around his waist, cupping his side.

“Although, do you think we can keep this between us? At least until I’m no longer Maya’s teacher,” Nick asks. “I don’t want to make things awkward for her or anything.”

“Yeah, yeah of course. I agree,” says Charlie.

“Although, there’s no one here right now, so…” Nick smirks, raising his eyebrows. Charlie laughs and downs the rest of his drink, setting it aside and dragging Nick towards him with an arm thrown around his neck.

They kiss languidly in the middle of the front room, arms wrapped around each other, moving like they’re making up for lost time. At some point, Nick moves Charlie back until they’re sitting on the couch, turned towards each other, making out with the sounds of the terrible music and their colleagues’ voices in the background. Charlie shifts, one leg crossing over into Nick’s lap, cupping both of Nick’s cheeks as he kisses him harder.

Naturally, they don’t get long before someone interrupts them.

Thunderous footsteps stomp towards them and they jump apart just in time for Harry Greene to round the corner, followed by Otis, Christian and another dad whose name Charlie forgets. He comes to a halt when he spots Nick and Charlie, sitting on the couch together in silence, drinks abandoned.

“Oi, what’re you two doing in here? It’s kind of boring, innit?” Harry teases, earning a few chuckles from the men behind him. “Come back in the other room and join us, lads. It’s New Year's Eve! You can’t spend the last hours of the year hiding away in my sitting room.”

“We’re fine, Harry, really. We’re just catching up,” says Nick, hands clenched into fists at his sides. “It’s too loud in the other room, anyway.”

“But that’s boring! Come on, lads. Up you get.” Harry crosses over and grabs them both by the upper arms, forcing them to their feet. “We’re just going to do some shots and you’re joining us! Let’s go!” He slaps Nick audibly on the back and Nick flinches, throwing Charlie a scowl over his shoulder.

Reluctantly, they both follow the others back to the rest of the party.

Charlie ends up having a pretty good time, all things considered. Once the drinks start pouring and everyone starts getting drunk, getting more frisky and inebriated, it picks up more. Someone changes the playlist to a Greatest Hits station and Abba or Queen or the Beatles starts playing through the whole house, getting everyone up on their feet, dancing and singing along, spilling drinks and stumbling to and fro.

Charlie hangs out with Sai, Sahar, Nick, Tara and Darcy for a bit, talking over the music and having periodic shots or champagne top ups. Soon, Charlie is pleasantly tipsy, his vision ever so slightly fuzzy at the corners as he shuffles around, drunk enough to sing along to the cheesy pop music or joining in with the dances.

With less inhibitions holding him back, he lets himself linger by Nick all night, brushing their hands together or holding his gaze for long moments or dancing with him in the middle of the room with everyone else. Nick responds with enthusiasm, nearly as tipsy, sliding his hand over Charlie’s back and whispering drunken compliments in his ear. Eventually, when the others are distracted, he manages to sneak Charlie away again, creeping up the stairs in search of another room.

They race up the stairs, cackling like children, trying not to slip or break anything. At the top, they pass a few others chatting at the balcony and pass another couple of mum’s chatting outside the toilet. None of them pay them any attention as they hurry past, eventually finding their way into some kind of office room.

It has two desks on either side of the room, both set with expensive Apple computers with organised paper and stationary. There’s a bookshelf along another wall, packed with various books of multiple genres, though most of them are law books or business books, much to Charlie’s disappointment.

“Jesus, how big is this place?” Charlie remarks, shaking his head. “How bloody rich are they?”

“Elizabeth’s a lawyer and Harry is a businessman who inherited a fuck ton from his dad. What d’you expect?” he replies, rolling his eyes and looking around the room. “He’d probably cry if he got the wrong colour Mercedes or something.”

Charlie laughs, nodding in agreement and settling on the floor by the bookshelf. Nick drops down beside him, close enough that their knees brush and their shoulders press together. He nudges Nick’s foot and Nick nudges back, eyeing him from the side, smirking.

“Have you been with anyone else in the past?” Charlie asks after a short, comfortable silence. Nick tilts his head, furrowing his brows. “I just mean, you know about my late husband, but I don’t even know if you’ve been with anyone before.”

“I have, yeah,” says Nick, bobbing his head. “You know about me and Tara, of course. And after that I had a girlfriend in sixth form for a bit before I had my first gay crisis and dumped her in a panic. Then I sort of saw some guys and girls on and off in uni, just trying to find myself, but never quite feeling it.” He shrugs a shoulder. “But nothing too serious… ever, really.”

“So, are serious relationships just not your thing, then?” Charlie asks slowly.

Nick smirks at the ground, fiddling with the lace of one trainer. “You just assume I don’t want a serious relationship and not that I just hadn’t found the right person yet?” he says, edging closer.

“So, you have found the right person?”

“I think so. Maybe,” Nick murmurs. He bites his bottom lip and looks down at his lap.

“Nick, what is this with us?” Charlie asks. “Do you want it to just be casual or do you want it to be serious?”

“The latter.”

“So, you want a serious relationship with me?”

“Yeah.” Nick’s eyes have gone wide, his pupils massive, swallowing up his irises, his tongue swiping across his lips for a sliver of a second. Charlie follows the motion with his eyes and moves his head closer to Nick, swallowing. “Yeah, I want this to be serious. If you do,” Nick whispers.

“I do, too.”

Then he closes the gap between them once again.

This time, they have much longer without any disruptions, hidden away in the office, far from the rest of the party. Nick clutches the fabric of Charlie’s shirt and Charlie cups Nick’s jaw, leaning into him, trying to get at every part of him. Nick’s other hand sneaks its way up the back of his shirt and Charlie gasps at the tingle on his skin, breathing heavily into Nick’s open mouth. Smirking, Nick takes advantage of his open mouth by deepening the kiss, pushing him back against the bookshelf, shifting until he props himself up between Charlie’s open knees, kissing him firmly, desperately.

Charlie gives and gives, holding Nick up, kissing back with as much as he’s got, certain he would let Nick do anything in this moment.

They deepen the kiss further and Nick’s fingers find their way further up Charlie’s shirt, cool against Charlie’s warm skin, sending goosebumps along his back. Charlie huffs against Nick, gripping the fabric of Nick’s shirt in two tight fists. It’s heady and bordering on overwhelming, making out slow and intense against the bookshelf, ignoring the rest of the party just below.

“Nick! Charlie! Where are you guys?” Sai’s voice calls up the stairs a while later, breaking up their heated make out. “The countdown is about to start!”

“Crap,” Nick murmurs, rolling to the side, off of Charlie.

“We should get back down there,” Charlie breathes, sitting forward, rubbing his back where it dug into the bookshelf.

Nick nods and pushes to his feet, holding out a hand to pull Charlie up after him. They walk hand in hand down the hall until they reach the stairs and walk down in a singlefile. They can already hear everyone counting down from 15 by the time they reach the bottom of the stairs and they shuffle into a dark corner together. Charlie spots Maya on the other side of the room with some of the other kids, counting down with the rest of the room, glad to be up past their bedtime for once.

“10!”

Nick grabs two glasses of champagne and passes one to Charlie.

“9!”

“8!”

In the shadows at the back of the room, Nick slips his hand into Charlie’s.

“7!”

Charlie presses close to Nick, leaning into him.

“6!”

“5!”

Nobody notices them, caught up in their own counting.

“4!”

Everyone raises their glasses at the ready.

“3!”

“2!”

“1!”

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!” The clock on the television screen changes to the next year and everyone bursts into cheers and applause. Everyone turns to their neighbours, clinking glasses together and kissing their partners and hugging their friends.

Nick glances this way and that and then tugs Charlie into another kiss. “Happy New Year, Charlie,” he murmurs against Charlie’s lips. The firework show sets off through the window, the colourful lights reflected in Nick’s dark eyes boring into his own.

"Happy New Year, Nick."

Chapter Text

A week later, Maya goes back to school again and Charlie goes back to work at the office again. It goes back to relative normality, carpooling for school, calling Elle and Isaac and making his way through mountains of unedited manuscripts. He asks Maya how her day was and makes her dinner and does housework when he gets home, cleaning the house thoroughly and doing his taxes and every other menial adult task. He goes back to his routine and back to his usual normal.

Well, not quite normal.

Now, Charlie speaks to Nick even more. They text and call every day, periodically throughout the day. And when he comes to the playground, Charlie allows himself to indulge in some extra conversation with Nick, leaning over the fence with a smile or lingering at the gate so he can talk to him a bit longer. Not much has changed with Nick aside from their conversations becoming much more blatantly flirtatious.

He still hasn’t spoken to Tao since he informed him about the last minute PTA party and it leaves Charlie on edge despite his joy at speaking to Nick again. He just doesn’t know how to get through to him, even now.

He would just have to fix it himself. Somehow.

But first, Charlie had Parent Duties to do.

One day, in the middle of the second week back at school, Charlie came to pick up Maya just like usual. It was colder than usual, even for January, the wind biting and unforgiving, even dressed in his green camel coat, a scarf and a beanie stuffed on his head. When he made his way over to the playground, it was empty, much to his surprise.

“Where is everyone?” Charlie wanders in through the gate, over to a parent making her way towards him, tugging on the hand of her child.

“It’s too cold for them to be outside, so they’re in their classrooms,” the mother explains, brushing past him and making a swift exit.

Charlie heads for Maya’s classroom and, getting a slight deja vu from the last time, he comes to find Nick and Maya at her desk together. This time, there’s several other students as well, playing on the carpet or hanging out at their desks, but only Maya and Nick appear to be working at the desk, both hunched over the paper while Maya furrows her brows.

“Hey,” Charlie says, knocking his knuckle on the door and popping his head through the doorway. He nods at another parent pulling on her own child, holding the door open for her.

Nick turns around and his deep frown turns into a gentle smile. He nudges Maya, murmurs something, then stands and walks over to him. Maya begins packing up her things, keeping her head down.

“Hey,” Nick says when he approaches. His face is slightly flushed and his hair is a little messier than usual, a deep frown wrinkling his forehead. Nick runs his hand awkwardly through his hair, messing it up further.

“Is everything okay? You and Maya have a weird vibe,” says Charlie, frowning over Nick’s shoulder. Maya’s bag is now packed, but she stays seated at her desk. She still has yet to look at him since he arrived.

Nick sighs and glances over his shoulder. Then, he gestures his head towards the door and they step out into the empty corridor, Nick shutting the door behind them.

“Maya was misbehaving today,” Nick starts, hands shoved into his pockets. “In every lesson. All day. She apparently threw a paintbrush across the classroom in art and ruined someone’s picture, then she refused to take part in any of the activities in PE and had to be sent to my classroom for the last half of it. In my own lessons, she kept talking out of turn and interrupting me or getting distracted from her work and doing something entirely different like drawing something in her notebook or reading under her desk. It was constant, Charlie.”

“Shit, really?”

“In the last class, history, she refused to do any of the work and when I told her off for speaking out of turn again, she told me to ‘Shut up’ and then stormed out of the classroom,” Nick continues, wrinkling his brows. “I had to spend ten minutes talking her out of the toilet and then she didn’t listen to a word I said when I tried to speak to her or get her to explain herself.” He turns, looking over his shoulder through the window into the classroom, exhaling sharply. “I was just trying to help her with more of her work when you arrived, but I’m still not sure I got through to her.”

Charlie sighs heavily and covers his face with both hands for a moment, groaning. “I’m so sorry you had to deal with that,” he apologises, dropping his hands. He leans to the side and peers through the window into the classroom. Maya still hasn’t moved from the desk, though she’s shifted to sitting with her chin on the table, mimicking Charlie when he’s ashamed.

“Has she ever done this before?” Nick asks. “I mean, she’s always been a bit of a troublemaker, but this is extreme even for her. She’s never been outright hostile.”

Charlie huffs and looks at the floor. He feels a cold dread filling his veins, embarrassment weighing down on him. He nods his head reluctantly, searching for the right words to say.

“So, right around when her dad started to get really sick and then even more after he died, Maya acted out a lot more like today. But it lasted for months on end,” he starts, toeing the ground. “She used to tear up her work and tried to run away from school or hide in the bathroom for ages. She once chucked all her stuffed animals out the window after we had an argument and she’d hide away in her room after dinner and refuse to speak to me for hours. Of course, I was in the depths of my own problems, so I wasn’t much help to her, but we both eventually got better. We both started seeing therapists regularly, which has helped immensely, but this stuff still happens from time to time.”

“Fuck, that sounds like a lot for both of you,” Nick murmurs, hands gripping the back of his neck. “But what could be making her act out now? Isn’t there usually a trigger of sorts?” adds Nick, frowning even more.

“I really have no idea,” says Charlie, fidgeting with his sleeves. “Her psychologist said it was a common trauma response for kids to lash out and have behavioural problems when they’re going through difficult emotions they can’t articulate or regulate properly, but I can’t think of anything recently that could trigger it again now.” Charlie leans against the locker next to him and folds his arms, scowling. “Maybe I’ve missed something or there’s something going on she isn’t telling me about.” His eyes burn from tears waiting to be shed, but he refuses to let himself cry. He digs his nails into his palms, trying to ground himself before he makes a fool of himself by crying in front of Nick once again.

“Hey, don’t worry,” says Nick, shuffling to stand next to him against the locker, nudging him affectionately. “It’s not your fault. We’ll get to the bottom of it, I’m sure. Whatever it is, you’ll figure it out.”

Charlie bites his lip, looking over at Nick. “I’ll try to speak to her tonight,” he says determinedly. “We can’t—I can’t let her bottle it up or keep taking out whatever’s bothering her on you and her peers. That’s not fair.”

The door to the classroom swings open and Maya pokes her head out, backpack slung over her shoulder. Nick and Charlie jump away from the locker immediately, both blushing furiously.

“Daddy, can we go home yet?” she asks, looking down at the floor. Her fingers fiddle around with the hem of her cardigan, twisting the fabric together, eyes still pinned downwards. It breaks Charlie’s heart to watch.

Charlie shares a look with Nick, then steps over to Maya. He kneels down in front of her, at eye level. “Of course, darling. I was just speaking to N—Mr. Nelson real quick,” he says, brushing her hair back from her face. She looks him in the eyes for the first time, her brown eyes so like her father’s that it clenches his heart to bursting. It takes everything in Charlie not to cry, looking into those endlessly familiar eyes. “If you’ve got everything, let’s go.”

Maya stalks past him down the hallway instantly, not looking back.

Charlie gets to his feet again, feeling hurt. He begins to follow her solemnly, but Nick grabs his arm, muttering his name. Charlie freezes. He turns over his shoulder, furrowing his brows in curiosity.

“I almost forgot to ask. We’ve got a field trip coming up in a fortnight and we still need chaperones,” says Nick. “It’s usually PTA members, so I was wondering if you’d be up for it? It would just be a day trip to the Natural History Museum in London, so nothing too fancy or far.”

Charlie glances down the hallway. Maya marches on ahead, taking no notice or care that Charlie hasn’t followed yet. “I’ll have to see with my boss, but I’d love to,” he says, pulling away from Nick and heading backwards down the hall. “I’ll speak to you later.”

Nick waves goodbye and watches him going down the corridor until Charlie rounds the corner and runs the rest of the way to catch up with Maya.

It isn’t easy trying to get through to Maya that evening. When Maya gets into a mood, it’s like trying to break through a brick wall using a broken toothpick to get through to her. She only eats half her dinner before retreating to her room and she doesn’t answer Charlie when he knocks on her door, trying to get her to talk to him. Charlie knows he could technically get inside since her door has no lock, but he was adamant about following a no-forced-entry rule unless it’s an emergency and he’s determined to keep giving Maya that much. It’s what he would have wanted when he was a kid, at least.

“Maya, please come out. I need to talk to you,” Charlie says, knocking on the door, ear pressed against the wood. He doesn’t hear a peep. “Please, I’m not mad at you. I just want to talk, sweetheart.”

Still no response.

It’s been two hours since she left the dinner table and Charlie has yet to get anything out of her. He keeps leaving her alone for a bit to see if she might wander out again, but every time he returns to her room, he’s met with the very same stone cold silence. With every time he returns, he gets closer and closer to going in, growing worried by the lack of response.

“Maya? Maya? Sweetheart, open up, please,” he says again, knocking harder this time. He slides down the wall and leans against the door, knocking over his head again. “Maya, please. You’re worrying me.”

After three and a half hours have passed without a peep, Charlie finally gives into the desire and he opens Maya’s door, calling a warning before he pushes it open and steps inside.

The lights are turned off, but for her dinosaur night light plugged into the wall across from her bed.

Maya’s bed, pressed against the wall on one side, across from a window, has a big lump in the striped duvet. It moves up and down towards the top, worryingly fast. Charlie kneels down beside the bed and slowly reaches his hand up to push the blanket aside to reveal the face of his daughter, half-covered by her hair.

“Go away,” she murmurs, opening her eyes to look at him between her dark curls. In the dim light, teartracks glint on her cheeks and her eyes are puffy. Her voice comes out croaky and breathy, her breathing coming out near hyperventilating.

“Maya, baby, you’ve got to talk to me,” Charlie whispers, brushing her hair back from her face. “Please don’t shut me out like this. I promise I’m not mad at you. I just want to understand what’s up.”

“Leave me alone,” she snaps, rolling around so her back faces him.

Charlie presses the heels of his palms into his eyes and shakes his head back and forth. “Sweetheart, just talk to me. Please. I just want to help.”

She sniffs. “Do you want me to go?” he asks, gently. She sniffs again, louder this time. Charlie swears his heart breaks. “If you really want me to go, I will. Do you want me to leave you alone?” After a pause, she shakes her head against the pillow.

He carefully gets up again and nudges her closer to the wall, pulling the edge of the blanket out from under her where she rolled. When she doesn’t protest, he climbs under the covers beside her, shuffling until he’s situated next to her, almost on the edge of the bed. Still, she stays silent, but Charlie feels her shifting against him, reaching back to pull one of his arms over her.

“Talk to me, bug,” Charlie whispers into her hair, pulling her tighter to his chest. It reminds him of when she was a baby and he used to squeeze himself into her crib when she wouldn’t sleep, holding her in his arms until she fell asleep. His husband always told him not to, but he could never help himself.

She’s nearing 7 years old and significantly taller, but Charlie still feels that constant desire to keep her safe, to hold her when she needs him to. He likes the feeling of being needed. He likes that she feels safe with him.

“Do you like Mr. Nelson?” she says finally, a few minutes later. It comes out quiet, barely whispered and muffled in her duvet.

“Of course, sweetheart,” he replies easily.

“No, I mean like like him,” she says. She rolls around in his arms and she frowns. “Like a crush.”

“Why would you ask that?” Charlie asks by way of avoiding said question. He was not expecting to be having this conversation so soon. And certainly not now.

“My friends think you do,” she says simply. “He talks to you all the time and you talk about him all the time and you were with him at the New Year’s party.”

“Mr. Nelson is… a good friend,” says Charlie slowly, his voice low in the darkness. “But why are you asking this now? That’s not why you acted out today, is it?”

Maya shrugs one shoulder, looking down. She sits up, crossing her legs, the covers falling down her chest. Charlie shifts, half sitting up against the pillows, waiting for her to continue. “I miss Papa,” she murmurs. “It feels like you’re replacing him with Mr. Nelson. I like Mr. Nelson, but he’s not Papa.”

Charlie’s heart jumps out his throat and jumps at the window, splattering. Charlie swallows, holding his breath, all the blood rushing from his face.

He reaches back, fingers searching the dark blindly until they hit Maya’s bedside lamp, flooding them in a warm glow a moment later. Charlie adjusts again until he’s sitting up straight, leaning against the headboard. He turns until he faces Maya head on, mirroring her cross-legged position. “I miss your Papa, too,” he begins, fiddling with the edge of his trousers. “And Mr. Nelson and I care about each other. That’s possible at the same time. Mr. Nelson is not replacing your Papa, no matter what. Even if we dated, he still would not be replacing your Papa, okay?”

“But it feels that way!” she cries, crossing her arms. “You talk about him more than you talk about Papa, now. You used to pull out photos of him every night and you’d tell me stories about him every day and now you just talk about Mr. Nelson all the time. You’re replacing him.”

Charlie pauses at that. He looks down at his lap, blinking. He idly thumbs the fabric of her pyjamas, thinking. He never thought about that.

“Maya, you know, when I used to do that stuff, I wasn’t happy, okay?” Charlie begins. “I missed your Papa so much that I wanted to keep him alive by talking and thinking about him all the time, but it wasn’t healthy. Of course it’s okay to miss someone when they’re gone, but I was trying to pretend that he wasn’t gone and it didn’t help either of us, remember? You had to stay with my friends a lot back then, remember?” She nods. “Well, I still miss your Papa, but it’s okay not to think about him all the time. It doesn’t mean anyone will ever replace him.”

“That’s not only why I was upset.” Charlie gives her his full attention, adjusting closer. Maya leans over, taking his hand off the bottom of her trousers. Instead, she fiddles around with his fingers, like she used to when she was little and learning what limbs were in the first place. “In art today, everyone was talking about their parents. We were supposed to be painting pictures to represent what family means to us and everyone was talking about their mums and dads and I couldn’t join in,” she explains, keeping her head down as she keeps playing with Charlie’s hand. “I don’t really mind so much now, but the other kids think it’s weird.”

“Weird how?”

“First I had two dads and now I just have one. I don’t have a real mum at all,” she explains. “One of the boys in my class, Henry, asked me why I was just painting me, you and Tibby and when I tried to explain, he said I was weird. He said everyone has a mum and dad and I don’t, so I’m weird. He hurt my feelings, so I threw my paintbrush at him, but I missed and it got on Priya’s painting instead.”

Charlie clenches his free hand under the blanket. He had no idea kids gave Maya a hard time for her home situation. He knew, obviously, some kids wouldn’t understand at first, but he always had the impression that they didn’t really care so much. He still remembers the looks he got from the parents at the start, but even now most of them didn’t mind that he was gay. But to hear that a kid was making fun of her for not only having a gay dad but for having a dead dad broke his heart. No wonder she lashed out.

Kids could be cruel. Of that, Charlie knew intimately well.

“Then,” she continues, “in PE, he was still being mean to me, so I didn’t want to run anymore. He tried to race me, but I didn’t want him to laugh at me anymore. I don’t want to run around if it’s no fun. But my teacher didn’t like that, so she made me go back to Mr. Nelson’s room early and told him I was being bad.”

“And what about in Mr. Nelson’s classes? He told me you were acting out with him, too,” asks Charlie, afraid of what he’ll hear.

“I was still mad about Henry,” she says. “And then I thought of how Mr. Nelson is replacing Papa and I got mad at him, too. And when he told me off, I was just mad at him for yelling at me and stuff, so I yelled at him and left the class so that no one else could be mean to me anymore.”

Charlie sighs and pulls his hand away from her, instead pulling her towards him, into a hug. At the sight of her so upset, his heart absolutely shatters. She hugs him back tightly, arms around his neck and her cheek pressing against his, her hair tickling him. “I’m sorry you had such a bad day, bug. It’s so unfair that people were mean about me and your Papa,” he says, rubbing a hand up and down her back. “But that doesn’t mean you can act out like that, okay? I know it’s hard, but it’s not fair to the other kids that get distracted or get their stuff ruined.” He leans back a bit, holding her still. “Next time someone picks on you, for anything at all, please just come to me or to your teacher, okay? Bottling it up and lashing out only makes you feel worse.”

A few minutes later, they lie back down under the covers. Charlie turns the light off again and settles down with Maya’s head on his chest, rising and falling with his breathing, her own heartbeat ticking against his side as well. It calms him, the reminder that she is alive and well and still his little girl, wrapped up in his arms, right by his side no matter what.

“Hey, Daddy?” she whispers a while later, just as Charlie was beginning to drift off.

“Yeah?”

“It’s okay if you like Mr. Nelson. He’s not Papa, but he’s nice,” she says.

She falls asleep seconds later. Charlie smiles to himself, pulling her closer to him. Even in his jeans, he has nothing to complain about, lying here, falling asleep to his daughter’s gentle breaths and the rhythm of her heartbeat against his side.

Chapter Text

Charlie and Tao have been friends since high school when they went to the same grammar school, quickly growing attached at the hip all throughout secondary school. While they also befriended Elle and Isaac and made the beginnings of the group they still have now, it was always Tao and Charlie who were the closest. They met first and they lived closest and they had more in common so it was only natural that they often chose each other for their friendship. It was Tao he came out to first (well, after his sister Tori, but she was different) and Tao who he went to when his first relationship with a boy in their class went south and it was Tao who listened to his endless rants about his on-again-off-again boyfriend in the first year and a half of university. He stuck up for Charlie when he got bullied for being gay and he was the one who helped him the most when he was in the depths of his mental illnesses.

On the other hand, Charlie was the first one to know officially about his crush on Elle and the one who spent the most time trying to get them together and it was Charlie he went to about most of his insecurities as a child and into adulthood. Charlie helped him make his short films when he was applying to film courses at university, enduring hours of set ups and Tao’s perfectionist streak. He listened to Tao’s endless rants about films and shows, watching even the most pretentious of films when no one else would and helping Tao to apply for countless jobs to try to get into the industry, even though Charlie had little clue what that entailed.

They were close. They always had been, ever since they were kids. But Charlie still didn’t know how to get through to Tao when he got like this.

It happened rarely, but from time to time, something happened that pissed Tao off so much that he completely withdrew from him, shutting him out and building up his walls until Charlie had to chip away at them to fix it again.

But at this point, over a fortnight since their argument, Charlie still hadn’t heard from Tao. He called him every day, just to get sent to voicemail every time and he asked Elle to speak to him for him, but she adamantly refused to get in the middle of it.

After over two weeks of still no word from Tao, Charlie finally makes a decision. He leaves Maya at Imogen’s for an impromptu playdate and then drives over to Elle and Tao’s house, knowing they’ll be home. When he pulls up to their house, he breathes a sigh of relief when he sees both their cars parked out front, their lights on in a few rooms in the house.

Charlie walks up the cobbled path to their front door, clutching the sleeves of his jumper, heart doing somersaults in his chest. He breathes deep, in and out, in and out, standing on their landing for a bit longer than normal. When he can no longer delay it, he knocks three times on the door, then steps back to wait with bated breath.

After a minute, Tao unlocks and opens the door. He freezes when he recognises him, his eyes narrowing with suspicion and one of his eyebrows raising. Before Charlie can even open his mouth to speak, he slams the door shut again.

“Are you kidding me?” Charlie blurts to the dead flower bush by the front door.

Less than a minute later, the door opens again and Elle stands there, arms crossed. “He slammed the door on you, didn’t he?” she says.

Charlie nods, kicking the step with his toe.

Elle shakes her head, curls bouncing on her head where she’s tied them back in a curly bun. “Come in and I’ll try to get him again,” she says, stepping aside to give him space to pass her. “He can’t hide from you forever.”

Charlie shrugs. “I guess not. I’m dreading explaining, though,” he admits.

She wanders towards their kitchen in the other room and Charlie follows, hands in his pockets, stalling. She pops the kettle on and leans against the counter. “He said it was about Nick. That you didn’t come to the party because Nick was going to a different party,” she says over the noise of the kettle. Her tone is skeptical, questioning.

Charlie’s cheeks flush, giving him away instantly. Elle’s eyes go wide with disbelief. “Wait, I can explain!” Charlie babbles, holding his hands up in surrender. “Something happened with me and Nick, but I messed things up and I needed to talk to him in person. And when Imogen told me he’d be there, I knew it was my best chance of talking to him without having to do it in front of all the kids or something.”

“Hmm. I guess that makes sense,” she says, drumming her manicured nails on the counter. “But I also don’t get it. What happened that meant you couldn’t just call him?”

“We kissed. After the fundraiser.”

Elle gasps, slapping her hands over her mouth, eyes going impossibly wider. “Oh, my God, Charlie! That’s amazing!” she exclaims. Charlie gives her a look and she makes an apologetic smile. Quieter, she continues, “Why did you have to speak to him in person about it though? Shouldn’t that be a good thing?”

Charlie runs his hands through his curls. The kettle finishes boiling, which gives Charlie time to think of a response while she pours them each a cup of steaming hot tea. When she finishes, handing him his perfect cup of tea in a purple turtle mug, she gives him a look to urge him on with his story.

“Well, after the kiss, I sort of avoided Nick,” he starts, cupping the mug in both hands. “I freaked out after it. I started thinking about Maya and how it felt like I was abandoning her dad or moving too fast since he died. I was terrified and it ruined my Christmas. Until I told Tori on Boxing Day and she talked me out of it because liking Nick doesn’t take away from how much I love anyone else.”

“Ah, I thought you seemed off on Boxing Day. That makes sense. I knew that you’d talk to me eventually about it if it was really bad, so, ” says Elle, fanning the steam on her tea using a hand. Her wedding ring catches in the light coming through the window behind her. “To be honest, I can’t really blame you for wanting to tell him that in person. It’s probably not the easiest to explain over text or even a call. It’s heavy.”

“Exactly! But Tao hung up before I could even explain myself and now he’s avoiding me so I still can’t explain,” Charlie complains, hesitantly taking a sip of his tea.

Elle sets her mug on the counter next to her and puts her hands on her hips. “You know how Tao is. You’ve been so obsessed with Nick recently, I think he was getting protective and jealous. He just didn’t want you to get hurt again, you know?” she says. “You’re both too stubborn and thick to ever realise how much you both care about each other.”

As soon as Charlie finishes his tea, Elle pushes Charlie towards the stairs where Tao is upstairs in his office, working on some editing. Charlie rolls his eyes and swats her hands away, but he goes up the stairs at last, fidgeting with his sleeves nervously.

Tao’s office door has been decorated with a collage of different actors and quotes stuck haphazardly onto a large camera clapboard. From outside, Charlie hears clicking and tapping, noting that Tao is indeed inside, probably working on some short film or something. Charlie knocks on the door and waits.

“Come in,” Tao’s voice calls.

Charlie opens the door at a snail-like pace and steps inside, curling the end of his jumper into his fists. Tao’s office is fairly small and cramped, filled only with a desk with a very expensive computer with fancy editing software on it, a bookshelf full of film books, autobiographies and a few of Elle’s books about feminism. As Charlie thought, Tao has a half edited short film pulled up in front of him when Charlie enters.

“Oh, it’s you,” Tao grumbles, spinning halfway in his roller chair, his orange hood pulled up over his head to hide most of his black hair. The bit of hair peeking out from under the hood sticks up in a comical cowlick of sorts.

“What’re you working on? That, er, mixing looks really good,” says Charlie, pointing at the screen.

Tao raises an eyebrow and turns back to his computer. “It’s called ‘masking’, but I appreciate the attempt,” he says, clicking a few buttons to save his work and then clicking out of the software. He spins his chair all the way around this time, arms folded, cocking his eyebrow at Charlie.

“Look, Tao, I’m really really sorry about the New Years Eve party,” Charlie begins, reaching over to the extra chair in the corner and dragging it over, perching on the edge. “I know it’s tradition and that’s important to you and I guess I’ve kind of neglected you recently with Nick around, so I should have thought more about how cancelling would affect you.”

“Yes, you should have,” says Tao, sniffing.

“But please, can I just explain myself?” asks Charlie, his voice going up several pitches. “I know it sucked for me to cancel on you, but I really, really needed to speak to Nick in person to—to fix stuff.”

“Fix stuff? What, you messed things up with the most golden retriever-like guy on the planet?” Tao scoffs with disbelief, making a face. “What could possibly upset Nicholas Nelson that you couldn’t deal with over the phone? I didn’t think the guy was capable of anything other than cheerful.”

Charlie groans, putting his face in his hands and leaning over so his head hangs between his legs, inches from the floor. After a moment, he drops his hands and peers up at Tao, pouting. “I might have snogged him after the fundraiser,” he admits, cheeks going pink.

Tao’s eyebrows shoot up, disappearing behind his hood. He blinks once, twice, three times. “You kissed him?” he asks. Charlie sits up, nodding. “Oh. Did he have a bad reaction to it or something? Because if he did and you tried to, like, apologise for it at the party, I’ll kick his ass because—”

“First off, you will do nothing of the sort. Look at Nick and look at yourself,” Charlie teases, raising a finger. Tao crosses his arms, but he doesn’t say anything against it. They both know that while Tao may talk the talk, when it came to anything beyond verbal contempt, he couldn’t hold up in a fight against anyone larger than a toddler. “Second off, it was actually me who had the bad reaction. I ended up avoiding him afterwards and ignored all his texts and calls and made myself absolutely miserable the entire holiday.”

“So, that’s why you were so distant on Boxing Day? Why would you be moping about kissing the guy you’ve been crushing on for ages?”

“Yeah,” says Charlie, wondering if he ruined absolutely everyone’s evening with his moping. “I… It felt too soon, maybe. Only a year and I’m already trying to get with someone new, nevermind my actual daughter’s teacher.”

“I mean, it isn’t that quick,” says Tao. “It’s not like you eloped or something. It’s just a crush.”

Charlie shrugs, looking down at his mismatched socks. One of his socks has a hole in it, so the side of his foot is a bit cold. “You know Maya told me the other day she feels like Nick is replacing her Papa?” Charlie says to his socks. “If I do actually decide to date him, what if Maya hates it because she thinks I’m just using Nick to replace my dead husband? What if that’s exactly what I am doing? What if I’m just wasting both our time in a relationship that’s bound to hurt not just us but also those around us?”

“Charlie, Nick is nothing like him,” says Tao, leaning across the space between them to pat his leg. “And I wouldn’t let the mind of a six year old dictate the meaning of your romantic relationships, you know. She thinks Frozen is a good movie, for goodness sake.”

Charlie snorts, kicking Tao’s ankle gently. “It doesn’t take a six year old to know that Frozen is a great film,” says Charlie. Tao looks scandalised, slapping a hand against his chest. “It’s no Paddington 2, but…”

“Okay, I’ll give you that one. Paddington 2 is elite,” says Tao. “But my comment still stands. Maya’s a kid. She misses her dad and I know that you miss him, too, but you’re hardly replacing him with Nick just because you like him. It’s okay to move on.”

“I guess you’re right,” says Charlie, smiling. “I am sorry about cancelling on you, though. I feel like I’ve been neglecting you recently since Nick came into my life.”

“It’s not that,” says Tao, shaking his head. “At first, I just didn’t trust Nick because I was worried he would lead you on and you’d get hurt. It’s not too soon to move on, obviously, but I didn’t want your first crush since he died to leave you heartbroken if he didn’t actually like you. I still think about how you were only months ago and I was worried that you’d end up even worse if Nick hurt you so soon.” His face flushes ever so slightly, high on his cheekbones. He gives Charlie a sheepish, awkward smile. “But when I saw you guys together at the fundraiser, I sort of changed my mind about that.”

Charlie sits up. “You did?”

“You guys were obviously flirting with each other the whole time, for one,” says Tao, ticking off on his finger. “Then I saw how well you guys worked together when you were running the stand and it was like watching actual machines work. It was almost creepy. And the bi pride flag pinned to his jacket was also a bit of a dead giveaway.”

Charlie facepalms, groaning. “God, I can’t believe I never noticed the pin before! Apparently he wears it on his work blazer every day and I never even saw it! And he has pride flags in his class!” says Charlie. “I just thought he was supportive or something!”

Tao bursts out laughing, so hard his hood falls down. His hair sticks up in all directions. “And I thought I was the oblivious one,” he says.

“You still are. You took years to realise Elle liked you even though the rest of us saw it from miles away,” says Charlie, leaning across the space to poke his knee. Tao lifts his middle finger and sticks out his tongue. “But anyway, if it wasn’t because you didn’t trust Nick and it wasn’t because I was neglecting you, why were you so mad about me cancelling?”

Tao shrugs dramatically, lifting his hands and everything. “I guess I just take the whole friendship tradition stuff too seriously sometimes, you know? We always had our film nights and now we always have our weekend dinners and we always have New Years Eve and Boxing Day together and stay up to watch the Oscars. That stuff is sacred,” he explains. “I guess I’ve always had this lingering fear that all of my friendships are doomed to fail and I’m worried that any sort of change will exacerbate that. And I didn’t think that Nick should get in the way of that stuff or create so much change. I always think friends should come first, but I guess I didn’t consider why you needed to speak to him in person and miss the party. I know you value our friendship and our traditions, so I should have thought of that before lashing out over it.”

“No, you were completely fair to get upset, Tao. I know how much that stuff means to you,” says Charlie.

“No, I shouldn’t have gotten so angry about it. It was petty. And I know that change is sometimes a good thing,” he says, eyes lingering on a photograph of him and Elle at their wedding. Sighing, he gets up and opens his arms. Charlie looks up at him from his chair, smiling. “Well? Don’t leave me hanging. That’s rude.”

Charlie stands up and throws his arms around his friend, hugging him tight around the middle while Tao wraps his arms around his neck, chin tucking over his shoulder. They stand like that for a good minute, just hugging in the middle of Tao’s little office with the computer buzzing faintly in the background.

When they pull apart, Tao’s eyes go comically wide and his mouth splits in a dramatic grin. “Ooh, we’ve got films to catch up on! I got some new DVDs I still haven’t forced you to watch yet!” he bursts out, grabbing Charlie’s wrist and dragging him out of the room and down the stairs to the tv.

As Tao squats in front of the DVD player and Elle joins them without question, Charlie feels a bit of weight lifting from his shoulders now that he has another best friend back.

~~~

The following Friday, Charlie lingers back to talk to Nick once again when he comes to pick up Maya and Timothy. Since Isaac’s car was getting its MOT that day and Charlie agreed to drop him off to collect it, he comes along with him to the school.

Because of the cold weather, the pickup is in the classroom once again. Charlie and Isaac wander through the quiet halls, admiring the different murals and the various boards showcasing artwork across the school years, chatting about their own school days. When they reach the classroom this time, they spot Maya sitting on the carpet with Timothy and Hasini Verma, colouring stuff in while Nick stands in the back, facing away from the door. A few other students sit scattered around the room here and there.

Charlie pushes the door open and steps inside, holding the door for Isaac. As the door creaks to announce their entrance, all heads turn in their direction. Nick, who appears to be fixing the Progress flag hanging from the boards in his ceiling, spins around, his focused frown turning immediately to a grin. Maya drops her marker on the floor and gets up, racing over to Isaac with a wide grin. She almost knocks him over with the force of her hug.

“Hello to you, too, Maya,” laughs Isaac, stumbling back, trying to catch Maya. “You saw me just a couple weeks ago.”

“Yeah, but you’re my favouritest adult,” she says into the folds of Isaac’s colourful jumper.

“Favouritest isn’t a word,” admonishes Charlie at the same time Nick, wandering over to the door, says, “Well that’s rude.”

They catch each other’s eyes and share a smile between them.

“Hi,” says Charlie, cheeks flushing.

“Hi,” replies Nick, his eyes softening as they glance at the flush of his face.

“Hello again,” says Isaac, tilting to the side as though he’s trying to remind them of his existence. He looks between them both with a knowing glint in his eyes.

Nick’s face goes bright red as he turns to Isaac. “Hello! Isaac, wasn’t it?”

“Yup,” says Isaac, waving a hand and smiling. He’s always been a man of few words.

“Well, it’s great to see you again,” says Nick, smiling. “What brings you here today? I thought Mr. Spring said you live nearby.”

“He’s getting his MOT so I was dropping him off after this,” says Charlie.

Maya heaves a big, exaggerated sigh and groans, drooping her shoulders so low her hands almost skim the floor, much like a small ape in a nature documentary. “You guys are boring. Can we go home already?” she complains, scrunching her face up.

“What’s a mot?” calls Timothy from the floor, sitting with his legs crossed. His curly hair has bits of paint and chalk in it. Charlie can already imagine Imogen’s unimpressed expression when he drops him off later.

Before any of the adults can explain it to Timothy, a pale, freckled boy with mousy brown hair wanders over to the group by the door, a devilish grin on his face. He looks up at Isaac, squinting his eyes together and tilting his head back.

“You look too funny to be Maya’s dad,” says the boy, squinting his eyes.

“Henry!” blurts out Nick immediately, throwing Isaac a horrified, apologetic look.

“What? But Maya said she had two dads, so I thought this was the replacement,” he says with an air of carefully practiced innocence.

Maya’s face goes scarlet red and her bottom lip trembles. “He’s my Daddy’s friend! He’s not replacing my P-Papa!” she babbles, her voice shaking and shrill.

“Well, then that’s weird,” says Henry.

Immediately, Maya bursts into tears and sprints out of the classroom, the door banging shut behind her. Isaac shakes his head and goes after Maya, leaving Nick and Charlie to deal with the devil that is Henry. The other kids still in the classroom have gone silent, watching the scene unfold.

“Henry, we’ve spoken about this already. You can’t say stuff like that,” says Nick, bending down to Henry’s level. His face is calm, expressionless, a picture of self-composure, but Charlie sees the way both his hands have balled into fists at his sides. “The next time you see Maya, I want you to apologise to her.”

“It’s not my fault she’s like that!” Henry protests, stamping his foot. “My parents said her Dads were always weird and wrong and that’s why one of them died.”

Charlie’s mouth falls open. From his delivery, Charlie can tell he’s merely parroting someone else, but the words sting nonetheless. The other classmates all gasp. Nick’s own face pales at the words and he glances at Charlie before going back to Henry. His composure has fractured and with it comes a deep, serious frown. “That’s enough, Henry. Now, apologise to Mr. Spring here for that horrible comment,” he says, his voice low and stern. His jaw has gone tense and a vein throbs in his temple, next to his hairline.

“Nick, it’s fine,” Charlie murmurs, tugging the fabric of Nick’s sleeve.

“No, Henry needs to understand that it’s not okay to speak to or about people like that. Just because someone is different from you doesn’t make it okay to be mean,” says Nick, aiming his comment more at Henry than Charlie. He frowns at him again. “Go sit over there and as soon as your mum comes to collect you, I’m telling her what you did. If you’re not going to apologise, you can go sit there.” He points across the room to a bright orange chair by one of the windows.

“But Mr. Nelson—!”

Nick points again, more sharp this time. He straightens up, frowning down at Henry. Charlie looks between the two, facing each other off. He’s never seen Nick look so angry in his life, curling his hands into fists to keep himself steady. “Henry, I won’t ask again. You can either calm down over there or you can apologise. Which is it?” says Nick tightly, chest heaving.

Henry pouts and marches across the room. He plonks himself down in the chair with a scowl, wrapping his arms around himself and narrowing his eyes at Nick and Charlie. The rest of the class watches on in stunned silence; clearly, like Charlie, they haven’t seen Nick this angry before either.

Nick huffs and turns his back to the troublemaker, his anger shifting to concern as he looks at Charlie. “I’m so, so sorry about that. That was… awful. We’ve been having a lot of issues with him recently,” says Nick in a low voice, out of earshot of his nosy students. “It seems to stem from his home life, but I’ve already had multiple talks with him this week about his behaviour. I’m sorry you had to see me lose my composure like that.”

“I actually thought it was endearing,” says Charlie nonchalantly, at a whisper. “It was nice to have you standing up for me, even if it was to a 7 year old.”

A blush forms high on Nick’s cheeks and he smiles at the floor, nudging Charlie’s feet. “I’m glad you got something out of it, then,” he mutters.

Their conversation takes a pause for a minute or so when another parent arrives, coming to pick up their child. They speak with Nick for a moment, all smiles and niceties, before pulling their child after them. Once they’re gone, Charlie turns back to Nick to continue.

“Actually, I think Henry might be the same boy who gave Maya a hard time recently that made her act out all day,” Charlie explains. “She definitely mentioned a Henry.”

Nick sighs, running his hand through his hair. He glances over to Henry for a moment. “I’m not surprised. I’ve noticed he seems to target her more than other kids, especially recently,” Nick admits, frowning. “I’m really trying to work on it, but his parents make it especially hard. They hate my teaching methods and pride flags, so disciplining their kid is almost impossible. I’m so sorry you guys have to carry the weight of it.”

“Don’t apologise. It’s illegal,” Charlie teases, smirking. “And it’s not your fault he’s like that. His parents are obviously horrid. Has Maya acted out again though?”

Nick raises his hand and flaps it back and forth. “Nowhere near as bad as that day, but sometimes. Mostly when Henry’s done something, actually,” he replies. “I had to move their desks to opposite sides of the class, but now she just scowls at him from across the room or they throw things at each other. Bit of a nightmare either way.”

“Sounds like it,” says Charlie, blowing his lips. He leans to the side to peek at Henry again and sees him still sitting in the chair, his elbow on his knee as he watches the other kids playing with a frown. “Can’t wait for a whole day of it on the field trip next week.”

Nick shudders his whole body, grimacing. “Don’t even remind me. As much as I look forward to the museum, I am not excited about trying to keep some of them behaving the whole time,” he admits, frowning. “At least you’ll be there.”

“Why else would you want me there?” Charlie asks, batting his eyelashes and making doe eyes. Nick snorts and flicks his arm.

Charlie turns back and sees how much time has passed since Isaac and Maya disappeared. He excuses himself and goes to get Maya’s bag, packing up her things with Nick’s help. Once he double and triple checks that he hasn’t forgotten anything, he says goodbye to the class and summons Timothy to go find Isaac and Maya and head home.

“I don’t like Henry,” Timothy says casually as they walk down the hallway together.

Charlie peers down at him, smiling. “Do you not?” he asks.

Timothy shakes his head. “No. He’s really mean. To Maya the most, but also the whole class,” he explains. “Mum says he’s a brat.”

Charlie snorts, inwardly agreeing with Imogen. Henry is certainly a nightmare child. He just hopes that Maya isn’t still too upset about how he acted.

Thankfully, they’re just waiting for them outside the car, both shivering, but nobody crying. Isaac has Maya propped up on his hip, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. When they spot Charlie crossing the car park, they both light up with grins.

“Finally! I thought you’d never return!” Isaac exclaims, letting Maya down. Then, in a low voice in Charlie’s ear only, he whispers, “I thought you guys would flirt forever.”

Charlie slaps his arm and passes Maya her bag, unlocking the car so she can clamber in. He never should have told Isaac he kissed Nick.

“How’re you feeling now, Maya?” Charlie asks a few minutes into the drive, peering at Maya in the rearview mirror. “I’m sorry Henry was so mean to you, sweetheart.”

Maya shrugs, watching out the window in her purple carseat. “I’m better now. Uncle Isaac told me to ignore him,” she says.

“Really? That’s good,” says Charlie, briefly shooting Isaac a smile.

“Okay, I might have called him a prick,” says Isaac. Maya and Timothy both giggle at the rude name and Charlie rolls his eyes.

Today is not the day for fighting against his friends swearing around his child and her friend. He’s got a grudge against a 7 year old to hold, now.

Chapter Text

The following week, the field trip to London finally arrives. Charlie and Maya have to get up and ready an hour earlier, Charlie making Maya’s breakfast for her to eat on the ride there and putting his coffee into a thermos to go. Charlie checks that Maya has a lunch for later, as well as some colouring books and markers to keep her occupied on the journey to and from the museum, since he knows she gets bored easily.

They arrive at the school 10 minutes early, only a few others already there. Among them is Nick and the other year 2 teacher Mrs. Kay, greeting the first arrivals outside the bus parked out front, ready to drive all the 6 and 7 year olds to London. Another mum whose name Charlie doesn’t remember stands with one of the girls from the other class and the other parent on the trip, unfortunately, appears to be Lili, whose child has already boarded the bus.

“Maya! Mr. Spring! Great to see you guys!” Nick calls from beside the other teachers, waving his hand at them, holding a coffee thermos in one hand.

Charlie and Maya cross over to Nick with equally tired smiles. How Nick already seems to be chipper is beyond Charlie. By the furrowed brows of Maya, she seems to be of the same mind as him. Tao’s words of a certain dog breed ring in his mind, clear as day.

“Why don’t you hop on the bus, now, Maya? Autumn and Hasini have already got here,” says Nick, smiling down at Maya.

“Is Priya coming?” asks Maya.

“Well, her dad signed the permission slip,” says Nick. “I’m sure she’ll get here soon.”

And so Maya clambers up the stairs to the bus, her voice carrying right outside as she greets her friends with enthusiasm. Once she’s gone, Nick turns to Charlie again, his eyes softening more.

“Hi,” he murmurs, nudging Charlie’s foot with his own. It seems to have become a thing of theirs, greeting each other with their shoes whenever they’re in public.

“Hey,” says Charlie, grinning.

“I was just gonna suggest that we can sit together on the ride, if you like,” says Nick, pointing his thumb over his shoulder. “It’s fine if you want to sit by yourself or something, but I just thought it would be nice to spend some extra time together. If you want to, that is. Which is fine if not. But, you know… Like I said, I totally get if you don’t want to—”

Charlie laughs and covers Nick’s mouth with his hand, standing on his toes. “Nick,” he laughs, “it’s okay. I’d love to sit with you.”

When Charlie gets back from putting his extra jacket with Nick’s bag at the front, more kids are beginning to arrive with their parents, greeting each other outside or their parents speaking with each other or the teachers. Nick is deep in a conversation with Imogen, who’s rambling about something while Timothy stands back, looking bored.

“Charlie! Hello!” Imogen exclaims when she spots Charlie, grinning. “It’s so good to see you! We barely spoke on New Years!” She throws her arms around Charlie, having to get up on her very tiptoes to reach him, thanks to her small height.

“Yeah, sorry, I got a bit distracted with the party,” says Charlie, hugging her back. “Are you here to chaperone as well?”

“Oh, God no,” she says, pulling out of the hug and making a disgusted face. “I hated chaperoning last time. Plus I have a meeting later today that I’ve got to attend. If I’d known you were chaperoning, I would have asked you to take Timothy for me.”

“Ah, well I’m sure we’ll miss your company,” says Nick, his smile bright. He turns to Timothy, still hovering awkwardly behind his mum. “You can get on the bus, if you like, Timothy. I think Maya might have a free seat next to her.”

Timothy eagerly hops onto the bus, waving goodbye to Imogen and scuttling up the stairs, Spiderman backpack bouncing on his back. Charlie, Nick and Imogen continue to chat for a few minutes until almost all the students have been dropped off and Charlie and Nick are needed on the bus. She waves goodbye to Timothy sitting in the window and then prances off towards her car, ponytail swinging behind her and heels clicking with every step.

“Right, I’ve got to do a head count,” Nick murmurs to Charlie once she’s gone. He pushes Charlie gently up the steps with his hand on his lower back, sending a chill up and down his entire body. Charlie swallows and scrambles into their shared seat, face flushed.

Nick stands at the front of the bus as the kids chatter to each other. He claps his hands together over the noise. “Okay, settle down, guys. Mrs. Kay and I need to see that you’re all here, but we can’t do that unless you settle down,” he says, giving the bus a joking smile.

Immediately, the entire bus goes silent. It’s impressive, really, the power that Nick holds over his students. Even the students that don’t have him for class seem to look up to and listen to him, watching him intently as he counts alongside Mrs. Kay. Without needing to intimidate or yell at anyone, Nick can silence an entire bus of year 2s in the blink of an eye.

Charlie doesn’t think he’s ever been more attracted to anyone in his life.

When he finishes his head count, the last 3 kids arriving in the middle, Nick drops into the seat next to Charlie, putting his bag at their feet and getting comfortable, only an inch away. The bus driver clambers on gruffly and at Mrs. Kay’s go ahead, he starts up the bus and rumbles on his way down the street. As soon as they set off, the kids begin chatting excitedly, their voices mixing together in a bubble of noise, their excitement contagious.

“So, what exactly are we going to be doing at the museum?” asks Charlie a few minutes later when the bus drives onto the motorway. A few students near the back have started up an off-key rendition of a song from Encanto, much to Charlie’s endearment.

“Well, we’ll be splitting up into two groups. The first group will be doing an interactive dinosaur workshop to go with their dinosaur unit while the other half will get to explore the museum. Then we’ll have a lunch break and switch it up so everyone gets to do both,” Nick explains, rattling off with his eyes closed like he’s visualising the plan. “Since you’re Maya’s dad and she’s in my class, we’ll be in the same group for the day. I hope that’s okay…”

Charlie bumps Nick’s shoulder, smiling lightly. “Of course it is,” he murmurs. “I’m always glad to have extra time with you, you know. You don’t have to worry about me growing tired of you, like, ever.”

Nick’s smile grows and he leans a little closer to Charlie, so that they sit pressed against each other from feet to shoulders. As they drive past the countryside, hills of yellow and brown and white rushing past, they get into a game of I Spy, trying to spot different farming equipment or animals as they drive past. After they both get bored of that, since most animals have been shut inside for the winter, they move onto discussing a variety of topics, Nick occasionally punching Charlie’s shoulder whenever they pass a yellow car or van.

Almost half an hour later, in the middle of discussing the latest movie they both saw, an argument breaks out at the back of the bus between a few of the boys. With a sigh and a pout, Nick carefully gets to his feet and makes his way to the back of the bus to tell the boys off and separate them. Charlie turns around in his seat, arms draped over the seat, watching the scene.

A few boys at the back are arguing with each other, their voices raised and one of them trying to lunge across the aisle to the other one. Charlie spots Maya a few rows ahead with Timothy, both of them looking over their shoulders at the argument going on just behind them. Nick passes them by without a comment, frowning at the boys fighting.

“Woah, what’s going on?” One of the kids in the row behind Charlie, a girl with two braided pigtails bouncing at her ears, looks up at Charlie as he looks to the back of the bus, leaning sideways over her friend to get a glimpse.

“Oh, I’m sure it’ll be fine,” says Charlie. “Just some boys being silly. But Mr. Nelson will fix it, I’m sure.”

The other friend, a girl with her dark hair in a bunch of cornrows with multicoloured beads at the end, turns around all the way in her seat, similar to Charlie, trying to get a peek at the action. Nick is gripping onto two seats at the back, talking low and stern with the boys while trying not to fall over.

“It looks like Jason and Henry are arguing again,” the girl with braids whispers to her friend, shaking her head with a disapproving frown.

“Of course they are,” says the other girl, rolling her eyes with a shocking amount of sass for a girl so young. They really do grow up fast these days.

When he finishes telling the boys off and separating them, Nick turns back and carefully wanders back down the aisle, using the backs of seats as handrails to keep from falling on the moving bus. “Holly, Katie, turn back in your seats now,” Nick chastises as he reaches the front. The two girls in the row behind, apparently Holly and Katie, spin around instantly, giggling together.

Nick snorts and plops down next to Charlie. “Everything okay back there?” Charlie whispers, jutting his chin towards the back of the bus.

Nick sighs, shrugging his shoulders. “Take a guess who’s being a menace again,” he whispers, rolling his eyes. “Apparently Henry took a dislike to something Jason and Tyron said and was badmouthing them and trying to get into a fight.”

“Jeez, that’s ridiculous,” Charlie murmurs, frowning. He’s really starting to dislike this Henry kid.

Thankfully, the rest of the journey goes by without a hitch. Charlie and Nick entertain themselves for the last hour or so to London by continuing their talk about movies, as well as discussing their friends and family, different musical artists and the merits of living underwater versus the moon. When the rolling countryside gives way to soaring skyscrapers and tower blocks, the buzz of the students only picks up as they begin to realise how close they are.

The bus pulls up to the bus bay outside the museum another while later and Charlie gets off with the other two chaperones seated near the front while Nick and Mrs. Kay and Lili deal with getting the kids off the bus without hassle. They make sure none of the kids wander off as they wait for everyone to get off and check they have their things with them, one of the kids having to go back to get his things. Then, as one big group of uniform-clad kids and their chaperones, they head up the staircase of the massive terracotta museum and into the enormous, high-ceilinged entrance hall.

While Mrs. Kay heads over to a desk to collect the tickets for all the students and chaperones, the others keep watch of the kids. Charlie takes the time to admire the inside of the museum, looking at its towering stone arches, skylight windows and the massive skeleton of a blue whale hanging from the ceiling like it’s swimming in the air. On either side of the entrance hall, under the arches, other exhibits have been marked off towards the other sides of the building and at the back of the room, a sweeping stone staircase goes up and splits off to either side of the next floor.

“Mr. Nelson, could you come here and help me with these tickets?” Mrs. Kay calls from over at the desk, holding up various papers. “I can’t find this one paper.”

Nick wanders over to help her, leaving just the chaperones behind to keep track of the kids.

“What is that thing up there?” one of the boys asks, pointing up at the ceiling.

“It looks like some kind of dinosaur,” says Lili, craning her neck up at the ceiling, tilting her head to the side.

“Actually, apparently it’s a blue whale,” says Charlie, looking up at the skeleton overhead. “I read that it’s been here for over 80 years, but it’s believed to be over 120 years old because it was kept in storage.”

“Woah, that’s so cool!” another student exclaims, other kids nodding in agreement. They all look up to him with eager, childlike wonder. Maya catches Charlie’s eye and gives him a big smile, standing up straighter with obvious pride at her dad answering a question.

Lili shoots Charlie a scowl over her shoulder, however, clearly peeved at being contradicted by Charlie once again. Charlie ignores it and starts to answer the kids' questions as they start to bombard him with questions as though he’s an actual tour guide and not just some chaperone parent.

“... but because of how deep whales swim, especially larger ones, it’s really hard to actually learn stuff about them.” Charlie is in the middle of explaining all he knows about whales when Nick and Mrs. Kay return with the tickets and stickers to give to all the students to split them up and lead them in the right direction first. Nick slows his steps as he spots Charlie, still rattling off about whale facts. “It’s also where a lot of myths about sea monsters have come from when fishermen spotted whales beneath the surface, but had no clue what they were.”

As Nick and Mrs. Kay approach the group, Charlie steps back from answering questions to let them address the students again.

“Okay, come along, 2A. We’ve got to head over to the dinosaur exhibit with Mr. Spring and Mrs. Quintana-Bach while Mrs. Kay will take 2B to the dino workshop with Mrs. Smith and Mrs. Fawcett,” Nick announces to the group, passing out a bunch of blue stickers to his students while the other class gets red ones from Mrs. Kay.

Once everyone has the right sticker, they split the groups off and Nick leads the way while Charlie walks towards the middle of the group and Mrs. Quintana-Bach takes the rear, trying to keep the kids in line. A woman dressed in the museum uniform meets them and leads the group through the main dinosaur exhibit to take them to all the different dinosaurs, listing off facts and stories about the dinosaurs or the finding and research of them. The kids all ooh and ahh at the impressive t-rex skeleton on display, all pushing past each other and murmuring in excitement as they try to get a good glimpse of the skeleton.

“Since when did you know so much about whales?” Nick murmurs, sidling over to Charlie hovering at the edge of the group, half-listening to the tour guide.

“What?” Charlie blurts, focused on the t-rex story. He side-eyes Nick. “Oh, yeah. I recently had to edit the manuscript of some scientist who wanted to publish a book about deep sea creatures, so I picked up some facts about them on the way. And I read the museum’s website page about the whale in the main entrance before coming.”

“That’s so cool!” Nick whisper-shouts, his face going wide with interest. “You must have so much random knowledge through your editing job. What else do you randomly know about, then?”

The group sets off again to another part of the dino hall and Charlie and Nick follow at a snail’s pace. “Well, I can tell you that the reason Coke and Pepsi taste different is because Coke was made pre-refrigeration and Pepsi was made post refrigeration. If Coke is drunk at room temperature and Pepsi is drunk cold, they actually taste the exact same,” says Charlie, remembering the book he recently edited which involved a drinks expert as one of the characters. “Learned that in a spy book I had to edit a while back.”

“No way! So if I just had Coke at room temperature—”

“Hey, sorry to interrupt, but we’re going to the next room now. You’re about to be ditched,” Mrs. Quintana-Bach interrupts in a low voice, smirking with a knowing glint in her brown eyes.

“Sorry, Rooney,” Nick mutters, hurrying to catch up with the rest of the group a good few metres away.

The rest of the tour is spent with little conversation between Nick and Charlie, both pre-occupied with listening to dinosaur facts and trying to stay with the group this time. At one point, Henry gets into trouble after telling one of the girls she looks like the dinosaur on display and Nick has to walk with him at the back of the group for the rest of the time, keeping him separated from the rest of the group to keep him from misbehaving again. Charlie already knows his mother will be getting a phone call as soon as Nick is free to do so, by the looks of his frown.

The last exhibit was at the triceratops skull, lit up by flashlights in the darkness as the guide continued to tell them facts about the creature, using her light to point to parts of the body. Charlie and Nick, both armed with their own flashlights, listened intently.

“As you can see, the triceratops has the largest skull of any known dinosaurs, with some of their remains as large as 6 and a half feet!” the guide explains, earning a round of yet more cries of interest. Even Charlie and Nick exchange interested looks.

Once the guide leads them back out of the dinosaur exhibit, the group heads out of the dinosaur zone to get some lunch at the indoor picnic area, where the other class is already waiting with their own food.

While the kids spread out at two long tables together, sitting with their friends and discussing what they just learned and saw, Charlie and Nick go to sit at one of the smaller tables, soon joined by Rooney Quintana-Bach. Mrs. Kay, Mrs. Fawcett and Lili have been left to watch Henry at another table, Mrs. Kay on the phone to Henry’s mum.

“So, which kid is yours, Rooney?” asks Charlie, looking up and down the table for a kid that looks anything like Rooney.

“Oh, mine is Bianca,” she replies, putting down her sandwich and flask, which she insisted was filled with tea. “She’s the one at the end with the curly hair and glasses.” She gestures her head towards her. At the end of the table, a tan skinned girl with curly shoulder-length hair sits drinking out of a juice box, chattering away with some of the other kids.

“She’s cute,” says Charlie, smiling. “Mine is Maya. She’s the one with the messy hair and purple hair clip.” He spots Maya at the other end of the table, clutching her banana sandwich in one hand and a dinosaur pencil in the other.

“So, Bianca is a lovely name,” says Nick. “I always wondered where you got her name. Is it a family name?”

Rooney’s cheeks redden at the question and she looks down briefly at her lunch, her long brown hair falling over her shoulder. “It’s a funny story, actually. My wife, Pip, and I had this whole rivalry back when we met in uni, but we got close doing the Shakespeare Society I basically insisted on starting,” she explains, talking fast and bright, hands moving all over. “I’ve always been obsessed with Shakespeare, so when we were finally successful with the donor, I talked Pip into naming her after one of my favourite Shakespeare characters.”

“Oh, from Othello! A classic,” says Charlie, grinning. “And you used a donor, did you? My late husband and I had a surrogate when we had Maya.”

“Really? I didn’t know that,” says Nick, frowning. “I thought she was adopted. She…”

“Doesn’t look a thing like me. I know,” Charlie finishes with a smile. He shrugs, his cheeks flushed.

The group falls into silence then, Nick and Rooney eating their lunch while Charlie half-heartedly watches the other kids. He watches Maya talking to her friends with wild hand gestures, spilling bits of her sandwiches without a care.

“You don’t have anything to eat?” says Nick, glancing at Charlie with a frown. When Charlie shakes his head, Nick sighs and grabs his wrist, pulling him away to find the museum cafe around the corner to get food.

Out of earshot of the rest of the students and chaperones, Nick continues their conversation from before as they hop into the queue at the cafe. “So, if she doesn’t look like you, is Maya, like—” He flaps his hands over each other, at a loss for words.

Charlie nods, getting what he means. “Yeah, she’s not really related to me, just my late husband,” he adds. He bounces nervously on his heels, always hating this conversation. “It does bother me, sometimes, you know. It’s like, when I look at her, sometimes all I see is her father and what I’ve lost. I know it doesn’t really matter, but sometimes I feel like I’m not enough or I’ve got to try harder because I’m not, like, technically her dad, biologically speaking.”

“That’s not true,” insists Nick, leaning towards him, a serious expression on his face. “Maybe you didn’t provide the sperm that made her, but you’ve raised her all by yourself, Charlie. Of course you’re her Dad through and through. Family isn’t always about blood. Sometimes, like my brother or your mum, the ones you’re actually related to are the ones that suck. It’s about who you care about the most, innit? And I’m sure Maya knows that’s you, even if you’re not the one related to her by blood.”

Charlie smiles at that, his heart wrapped up in a big, warm blanket, playing over Nick’s words. Charlie still has no clue how he got lucky to have such a wonderful person in his life, nor how close he was to losing him just because of his own fears.

“Actually, I wasn’t legally considered her Dad on her birth certificate for a while,” says Charlie. “Only her birth mum and my husband were allowed on the certificate until we went through a year-long process of trying to get that changed.”

Nick’s eyes go wide and he blows out a puff of air. “That’s awful. I’m so sorry you had to deal with that,” he says.

Out of sight from the rest of the group, Nick reaches for Charlie’s hand, squeezing tightly. They step forwards in the queue together in silence, still linking hands.

“Thank you,” he says as Nick’s thumb swipes over his hand. “I never thought I’d have something like this again.”

“Me neither,” whispers Nick, his eyes crinkled shut with how wide he smiles at Charlie now. “I never thought I’d have something like you at all. I’m so—I’m so lucky.”

Charlie grins and looks around to make sure no one they know is looking. Then, on his toes, he presses a firm kiss to Nick’s lips, Nick’s arm curving around his waist.

“God, I wish I knew you sooner, sometimes,” Nick murmurs when they pull apart again. Charlie smiles, squeezing his hand again and nodding.

When the line moves ahead again, they pull apart and step forward, Charlie scanning the menu overhead.

Charlie orders a simple muffin, a packet of crisps and a latte, while Nick gets himself a coffee as well. As they wait at the side for their orders, they huddle close together, whispering, their hands joined together again.

“Hey, lovebirds, we’re finished with lunch now. I was looking for you guys everywhere.” Rooney appears next to them, cockblocking them once again. Charlie drops Nick’s hand instantly and gives Rooney a pout, which earns him a giggle as she spins and heads back to the rest of the class.

Charlie grabs his food and drink and he and Nick half-jog back to join the others, Charlie shovelling his food in his mouth as they go to join the dino workshop.

Apparently, the dino workshop is basically just 45 minutes for the kids to learn about a stegosaurus at the museum, followed by an interactive group exercise to practice the anatomy of the dinosaur, create a puzzle stegosaurus (a stego-jigsaw-rus, specifically) and then create a poster about what they learned. For the most part, this allows the adults to take a step back, mostly just watching and half-listening to the very basic facts that they’ve already pretty much seen in the tour. Charlie quietly finishes his muffin and coffee in the back as he watches with Rooney.

Nick insists on joining in with the students for the activities, jumping from group to group, asking the kids questions and looking at how they’ve progressed. He answers questions or sends them to the workshop leader when he can’t answer himself, helps give hints to the tricky parts and compliments all the kids on their work with a genuine grin. Charlie and Rooney half-heartedly try to help as well, but they eventually end up sitting together at the back of the room, chatting about being two of the only queer parents in the school.

“No, but every time I mention the word ‘wife’, it’s so funny to see them trying to put two and two together,” Rooney is saying towards the end of the workshop, talking about various playground incidents. “You must get similar, surely.”

“Oh, all the time. People get so creepy about whenever there’s gay people around their kids,” says Charlie in reply, rolling his eyes.

“And nosy!” adds Rooney, nodding. “Some of the questions I’ve gotten about me and my wife from parents are so bizarre.”

“Have you ever had people speculate your sexuality right in front of you because they can’t figure out how you have kids?” Charlie asks. His mind vividly remembers just weeks ago at the winter fair.

Rooney scoffs, slapping her forehead. “God, yes! Like, I know I’m stunning and all, but do you really have to speculate how I had kids?” she chimes. Charlie laughs, shaking his head at her humour.

“Alright, everyone, that’s all the time you’ve got for your posters!” the workshop leader announces, clapping her hands together at the front of the room, smiling wide. “If you like, you can take the posters home, too!”

“Actually, yeah, you guys will have to bring those,” interrupts Nick sheepishly from where he’s kneeling on the floor with one of the groups. He has a purple line of pen on his cheek. “Tomorrow, you’ll all have to present your posters to the class with your groups.”

The class collectively groans at this, but Nick pretends to plug both his ears, screwing his face up. This earns giggles from the students and they all pack up their stuff and head out together in high spirits.

Back on the bus, Charlie and Nick take their same seat near the front of the bus together. For the first 20 minutes or so, they get to talk to each other without much interruption, continuing to talk about some of the facts Charlie’s learned from manuscripts, much to Nick’s clear fascination. However, when another argument breaks out between Henry and Jason at the back of the bus, Nick has to move to the back, switching spaces with Henry, who ends up sitting next to Charlie for the rest of the ride, much to his horror.

Keeping his screen out of sight from Henry, who pouts and keeps kicking the wall in front of him, Charlie texts Nick:

Charlie: i can’t believe you’ve done this to me. you’ve sat me with the literal devil incarnate!

Nick: I’m sorry!!! I can switch with you so you watch the back of the bus if he’s really that bad…

Charlie: IT'S FINE! but you totally owe me for this

Charlie sends a smirking emoji at the end of his text, biting his lip as he sees Nick’s typing bubble pop up immediately. It goes up and down for a solid minute as Charlie waits, holding his breath and trying not to kick Henry into the aisle as he keeps kicking the seat. At last, Nick’s message pops up:

Nick: How can I ever repay you? ;)

Blushing, Charlie has a whole list of ideas for how Nick can make it up to him. He turns around in his seat and catches Nick’s eye down the aisle, stuffed in the back row between Jason and the window. He smirks at him when he catches Charlie looking. Charlie winks and then turns back to the front.

He’s sure Nick will make it up to him easily. He’s Nick, after all and Nick always pulls through.

Chapter Text

For the next few weeks, not much changes. Chilly February gives over to slightly warmer March, melting the very last of the snow and bringing with it near constant rain and wind. Charlie’s back garden floods from the rain and the Spring cat grows restless after weeks of being shut inside because of the horrible weather. Charlie keeps going to the PTA meetings as well, thankful for the extra time he gets to spend with Nick and get closer to the other parents and teachers.

Really, Charlie is thankful for Nick’s suggestion back at the start of the year to join the Parents’ and Teachers’ Association, even if it seemed laughable at the beginning. Now, months into Maya’s second year at school, he finally feels solid on the ground, no longer drowning in trying to figure out how to raise a child all by himself, exchanging advice with the other parents and getting support for Maya that he can’t get from his friends without kids. He even gets to pass on his own words of wisdom sometimes when parents ask and he’s glad to be involved so much in Maya’s school life.

One evening, halfway through a March PTA meeting, Nick pulls away from his conversation with Christian and the other PE teacher, Mrs. Banks, coming over to where Charlie is in the middle of perusing the drinks selection at the table. Charlie looks up from his lemonade at Nick’s approach and a smile melts onto his face, his chest loosening ever so slightly like it always does whenever Nick is near.

“Hey,” Charlie murmurs, stepping away from the table.

“Hi,” Nick responds.

“What’s up? Is everything okay?” Charlie asks, scrunching his face up in confusion.

Nick hums, giving him a thumbs up. “I was just coming to ask you something.”

“Oh? Should I be worried?”

“I should hope not,” Nick laughs. It comes out slightly nervous though, which still gives Charlie cause for concern.

He eyes the others mingling around the room before their usual meeting and takes Nick’s upper arm, guiding him farther from the listening ears of their colleagues. He takes a sip of his drink and stares at Nick, silently urging him on.

“First, are you going to come to the spring music concert in a couple weeks?” asks Nick.

“Uh, yeah I am. Why?”

“Well, it’s just that a few of the PTA members and I were thinking of going for some drinks before the concert starts, since it’s not until the evening, so I wanted to know if you’d like to join us,” says Nick.

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t be interrupting you guys, would I?”

Nick blinks, shaking his head back and forth. “No, of course not! I want you to come. It’ll be fun.”

Charlie smiles faintly, reaching out to lightly fiddle with the collar of Nick’s blazer, flipping his bi pride pin the right way up. “I’d love to come,” he murmurs, eyeing the rest of the room. “Is that all you wanted to ask?”

Nick shakes his head, his cheeks a pretty pink shade. He glances over his shoulder at the rest of the room, then turns back, taking a step closer. “I wanted to ask if you would go with me for a proper date. Not just hanging out at these things or field trips,” says Nick. “If you want to, of course.”

A smile spreads on Charlie’s face like warm butter. “Really? You want to take me on a date?” he asks, his eyes going wide. Nick bobs his head, biting his lip. “I’d be honoured, Nick.”

“Great! I look forward to it!” Nick exclaims, grabbing Charlie’s free hand and bouncing it up and down like an excited little kid. He doesn’t give any care or notice for the looks this earns them, so caught up in Charlie. “I’ll text you later and we can make more of a plan.”

The meeting starting for real cuts their conversation short and Charlie and Nick stroll over to the long table to join the rest of the group. A few of their friends, including Imogen, Sahar and Sai, give them both a look as they sit down, but they thankfully make no comment.

Nick bumps Charlie’s leg under the table and they share a small smile with each other before turning their full attention to the task at hand.

~~~

A couple weeks later, the day of the spring music concert rolls around. Maya and her class, conducted by their music teacher, will apparently put on a performance of ‘Walking on Sunshine’ for the school and because she joined the school choir this year, she’ll also be singing a few Disney songs with the other kids in the junior choir. Charlie’s heard her practicing for the last few weeks, singing while she works or showers or plays, singing a whole variety of songs. Charlie finishes all his work early so that he can beg his boss to go home early for ‘an appointment’ and then, in the evening, he heads to the cafe around the corner from the school where Nick is meeting him outside.

When he parks his car and walks the rest of the way to the cafe, he spots Nick standing outside, hands in his pockets and a hoodie under his blazer as the wind blows strong. He grins when he spots Charlie coming over, jogging over to greet him with a hug that almost knocks him off his feet.

“Woah, hey, what’s this?” Charlie laughs as he reaches up to hug Nick back, arms wrapping around his torso.

“Nothing. It just feels like it’s been a while,” says Nick, pulling out of the hug with a flushed face and messy hair. He keeps near Charlie, fiddling with the buckles on his coat between his fingertips.

Charlie rolls his eyes, moving towards the store with Nick on his tail. “You’re a dork, you know that?” he says, stepping past someone to open the door to the cafe and hold it open for Nick.

The inside of the cafe is small and quaint with flower pots dotted around the room or rainbow banners hanging from the ceilings, wooden tables and chairs with multi-coloured pastel cushions and gentle indie music playing in the background. The front counter is a pale turquoise colour while the walls have been painted a baby pink with colourful butterflies and birdcages. It looks like somewhere either an old grandma or a hip 20 year old would open with its kitschy lace doilies and flowery teacups and black and white photos hanging on the walls in pastel coloured picture frames.

Sahar, Christian and his wife Amal and Darcy and Tara are waiting at a table near the back of the shop, looking over menus spread across the table when they enter. Sahar is the first one to see them, grinning and waving them over to join them, the others also looking up and smiling when Sahar alerts them.

“Finally! We were starting to wonder if you were ever coming!” Darcy exclaims with a grin, shuffling down to give Charlie space to sit down next to her, across from Nick.

“Sorry, I got held up at work in Central London,” says Charlie, rolling his eyes.

“Ooh, where do you work?” asks Tara, leaning past Darcy to see him better.

“Uh, I work at Maddox Publishing,” he explains, grabbing one of the menus off the table. “I edit manuscripts.”

“Oh, that’s so cool!” says Sahar, sitting next to Nick with a genuine smile. “How did you get into that?”

Charlie blushes, looking down at the menu in front of him and shrugging a shoulder. “Oh, well, you know… I liked reading and stuff, so…” He scratches the back of his neck, his shoulders hunching up with discomfort. “I, er, studied it in school and found an advertisement for it a few years back so…”

He’s never gotten used to people asking him about his career or interests, so used to people mocking his every thought throughout his life. How many details do they really want from him when they ask him about himself? What if he says too much or too little?

This leads to a short, uncomfortable silence, which is thankfully broken by Sahar not a moment too soon. “So, shall we go order?” she asks the table, putting her menu down.

The group nods and gets up to queue up at the front of the shop. Charlie and Nick take to the back of the line to continue trying to choose their drink orders. The menu hangs over the back of the till, written in neat, colourful chalk on a blackboard, describing all sorts of drinks and food that has even Charlie intrigued.

Slowly, everyone heads back over to the table to wait for their orders to be called out, leaving only Charlie and Nick still waiting in line. At that moment, a barista with a lilac apron tied around her waist turns to Charlie, a matching lilac hijab tied neatly around her face.

“Hi, what can I get you guys?” she asks, one hand hovering over the buttons on the cash register. In pink writing, the name tag attached to her jumper says ‘Angel’ on it, Charlie notes.

Nick insists on paying for Charlie’s drink order, refusing to let him pay for his drink. They bicker for a few seconds over it, but when the barista plugs in Charlie’s order regardless, Nick taps his card on the reader before Charlie can begin to stop him. Charlie’s mouth drops open in protest, turning to complain to the barista, but she merely shrugs and gives them a knowing smile before turning to make their drinks.

“I hate you,” Charlie mumbles as Nick pushes him back to the table, scowling.

“You weren’t saying that on the phone last night,” Nick murmurs in his ear, fingers brushing very briefly on his backside. Charlie freezes, face going scarlet as Nick slips past him and sits back in his seat like he hadn’t just stunned Charlie.

“You alright, Charlie?” asks Darcy, cocking a single blonde eyebrow up at him as he just hovers by the table, blushing furiously.

Charlie shakes himself off and joins the table without a response. He can feel Nick eyeing him with a smile, but he tries to ignore it.

A little while later, everyone digging into their food and drinks, the group dives into conversations. The couples talk about how they met, Darcy and Tara talking about Tara’s lesbian awakening being shut in a room with Darcy while Christian and Amal talk about literally running into each other at a library. The group laughs and talks and teases each other over their meals, hanging out like they’ve known each other for years. Charlie finds himself unable to stop smiling, joining into the conversations with surprising ease and listening to other’s stories with excitement and anticipation. The non-teachers talk about their jobs and lives and they all talk about their many experiences with children both good and bad.

“... and then I had to actually leave the room to keep from laughing at the fact that a literal 6 year old said ‘fuck,’” Nick tells the hysterically laughing table. “I can’t imagine what the other kids must’ve thought!”

“At least you weren’t the one that accidentally taught your toddler the word ‘cunt’ because you were bitching about a daycare mum,” says Charlie.

“No!” says Tara, slapping the table, eyes wide.

Charlie nods sheepishly. “I wish I was joking. It was mortifying, especially when I got a call from the daycare saying she said it to another kid.”

“Okay, that’s worse than mine,”says Nick through a laugh.

“We’re getting a second round of coffees, right?” says Christian, finishing the last of his iced drink. “I’m gonna need a whole bucket of caffeine to get me through this concert tonight. There’s a reason I teach PE and not Music.”

The table agrees as one and Nick and Charlie both offer to go up and get them for everyone, taking everyone’s orders and wandering over to the till together. This time, after ordering, they both stand by the collection area, chatting.

“You having a good time?” asks Nick, leaning an elbow on the countertop.

“I am! They’re all really great.” Charlie nods his head enthusiastically.

“Lavender and white chocolate latte for Nick,” says Angel, sliding the first floral mug across the counter towards Nick. She gives them both a smile before returning to making drinks.

“Let me try that,” says Charlie, grabbing the mug before Nick can. He lifts the mug and takes a small sip, instantly wincing. “Okay, that is bizarre. How can you drink that? It’s so sweet!”

Nick gasps, slapping a hand on his chest. “I can’t believe you’re slandering lavender coffee in front of me!” he exclaims. Angel pushes another two drinks towards them and he shakes his head, frowning. “I’m not sure I can keep dating someone with such a close-minded attitude.”

Charlie rolls his eyes. Angel hands him his own coffee with a smile and before he can take it, Nick grabs it from Charlie’s grasp.

“Oi, that’s mine!”

“Let me try it and see who has the superior—” Nick freezes, pausing with the mug at his lips. “Wow. That’s good.”

“See? Look who’s got superior taste, now!” says Charlie smugly.

“We’ll just have to swap!”

“Nope, you did this to yourself. Enjoy your sad purple coffee while I drink my elite chocolatey goodness.”

Nick and Charlie bring the rest of the drinks back over to the table with Sahar’s help and everyone returns to their conversations and drinking. Only five minutes later, Amal suddenly looks at her phone and announces that they only have 15 minutes until the concert. In a panic, the 7 adults chug their drinks like uni students on a pub golf crawl and make their way out of the cafe in a stampede not unlike their children heading for recess.

Running or driving back to the school, they all make it to the school with just over 5 minutes until the start. Charlie, who gets stuck behind a minivan full of 7 kids, is the last of the group to arrive, jogging into the school just as Nick, Tara and Darcy are chatting while waiting to get inside the hall.

“You and Charlie sure are getting close, it seems,” Charlie hears Tara saying to Nick with a knowing smile.

Nick stuffs his hands in his pockets and leans back a bit, bouncing on his heels. Charlie pauses to listen, watching the conversation from a few feet away. “Er, yeah, you can say that,” says Nick sheepishly. He bites his lip and looks at the queue, nobody noticing their conversation nearby. “Actually, we’re sort of going out now. It’s nothing too official yet, but I’m hoping we can change that soon.”

“Oh, Nick, I’m so happy for you!” exclaims Tara, grinning.

“I’m just happy for me. Tara owes me a tenner, now!” cuts in Darcy, half-dancing on the spot. Tara and Nick laugh at her with a mixture of humour and exasperation.

Charlie decides now is the time to make his presence known and walks up to the trio with his hands in the pockets of his green jacket, looking between them. Nick’s face immediately turns red and Tara and Darcy both give him wide grins, clearly both waiting to tease him.

“So, shall we head inside?” Charlie suggests before any of them can open their mouths.

Because of how late they show up, the group has to sit near the very back of the auditorium, sneaking together as quiet as possible. Charlie and Nick hurry to the back, between Sahar and Darcy, hiding behind programmes they got from the front entrance. Charlie spots Maya in between a couple other students at the front and feels a grin spreading across his face when she waves eagerly at him across the auditorium. He quickly returns the wave, catching Nick smiling at him from behind his programme.

When the music teacher moves to the front of the auditorium to announce the concert, Nick and Charlie share a glance between them and Nick silently covers Charlie’s hand on his knee as the lights turn off overhead.

Needless to say, Charlie doesn’t remember much of the performances beyond his daughter singing.

~~~

Unfortunately, any proper one on one date between Nick and Charlie is soon put on hold. Soon, the Easter holidays roll around and they hardly find any time to even talk to each other let alone sneak out for a date together. They aren’t even in the same area as each other for most of it as Nick takes Nellie with him to visit his mum for the holiday while Charlie takes Maya to Brighton for a few days with Tao, Elle and Isaac since none of them are big Easter fans, preferring to spend the break hanging out on a beach or looking around the area. Tao insists on taking her on all the rides she’s tall enough to ride and Isaac buys her an obscene amount of books from an independent bookshop and Elle helps her to build a sand castle and bury Tao up to his neck.

When they finally come back from the break, Maya’s birthday is coming up and Charlie is overrun with sorting out her party. Despite having multiple manuscripts to work through, he spends hours sorting through all the invite RSVPs he got since inviting all of Maya’s class to the bowling alley and arcade down the road and planning everything. Thankfully, almost half the class is unable to make it, but it still means Charlie has to sort through all the party bags and cake and decorations before Maya’s birthday comes up. He’s so busy planning and working as well that he has to recruit Isaac to buy Maya’s gifts for him.

On the Thursday before Maya’s birthday party on the Saturday, Charlie comes to pick her and Timothy up from school, almost blown away by the strong winds that come with every mid-spring. All the mulch on the playground is fluttering around and everyone’s clothes are whipping around in the wind, though none of the children give it much mind as they run around together, laughing and shrieking.

“Oh, hello, Charlie!” says Sai, almost bumping into Charlie as he makes his way out of the playground with Hasini trailing behind him.

“Hey, Sai. How are you?”

“I’m great, thanks!” says Sai, adjusting his glasses where they’ve fallen down his nose. “Hasini’s very excited about Saturday, by the way. Thanks so much for the invite!”

“Oh, it’s no problem! I’m glad you guys can make it!” says Charlie with a smile.

“What’s this about Saturday?”

Charlie and Sai turn to see Nick wandering over, hair swept back from the wind and his yellow tie thrown back over his shoulder in the wind pushing towards him. His face is slightly pink from the windchill and Charlie swears his eyes are watering slightly, too.

Sai takes advantage of Charlie’s distraction to lead Hasini over to the car and out of the wind, so Charlie and Nick stand together at the edge of the playground. “Oh, yeah, it’s Maya’s birthday party at the bowling alley,” says Charlie. “Her birthday is technically Sunday, but I’m taking her for dinner with Tori and her fiancé, Michael.”

“Oh! That sounds like fun!”

Charlie clears his throat and glances over Nick’s shoulder where Timothy, Maya and Priya are chasing each other around the jungle gym. Despite the chill in the air, Maya has ditched her jacket and cardigan in favour of moving around freely. “Would you like to come? The whole class is invited and some of the parents will also be going, so you won’t stick out too much. Plus you’ve already met my friends and they’re going.”

“Really? You want me to go?”

Charlie nods vigorously. “Absolutely. It’ll be fun!”

Nick bites his lip and looks down at the floor, their toes almost touching in the mulch from how close they automatically stand. He rubs the back of his neck and peers up at Charlie through his lashes. “Well, if it wouldn’t be too weird, I’d love to come,” he says at last, cheeks growing pinker. “Although, you’ve given me almost no time to get a gift!”

“Oh, you don’t have to, really! I’m sure she’ll get plenty from her classmates and my friends!”

“Oh, I’m getting her something,” says Nick, standing up straight. “I’m an excellent gift giver, Charlie. Nobody’s ever complained, yet.”

Charlie beams. As Maya and Timothy wander over at last, he clears his throat and starts walking backwards towards the gate again. “I’ll text you the address later!”

As he leads Maya and Timothy towards the car, bags bouncing off their backs as they jog onwards, Charlie looks over his shoulder towards the playground. Nick stands by the fence, one hand in his pocket while the other hand raises to wave at Charlie as he heads off. Charlie can’t help the smile that crosses his face at the sight.

Chapter Text

On Saturday, Charlie wakes up to a heavy thud on his chest, gasping awake with a racing heart. Disoriented, he looks around through squinted eyes, coming face to face with a pair of wide eyes directly in front of him. As he shakes himself fully awake, he recognizes his daughter sitting right on his torso, still in her pyjamas, excitedly bouncing up and down so that he fears last night’s dinner will come right back up at any moment.

“Alright, alright, Maya. You’re crushing me,” Charlie grunts, gently pushing his daughter off him and tossing aside the covers to follow her into the kitchen.

While Maya plays with the cat and watches cartoons over homemade pancakes with maple syrup, Charlie goes over last minute preparation for the party that afternoon. He looks through all the colourful party bags set on the kitchen table, making sure he hasn’t missed out on any items from the list, calls the bakery to double check timings for picking up the cake for the party and sets all the decorations in a bag by the front door so that he won’t forget. He goes over everything meticulously, making sure he hasn’t missed any details on the 3 separate lists he made, spread out over the dining table.

By 12:30, Charlie and Maya arrive early at the bowling alley with the car full of goodie bags, decorations and the box carrying the birthday cake. Isaac and Imogen, the first to arrive for the party, help him set up the area of the bowling alley Charlie booked out while Timothy and Maya play on one of the arcade games until the others start to arrive. Slowly, one by one, everyone starts arriving at the party, handing over gifts and smiles, joining the other kids at the bowling lanes they booked out or hovering with the other adults staying for the party as well. Soon, only Nick remains unarrived. Charlie, somewhat disappointed, goes to help the kids set up names and sort out rules for the games.

“Of course you can call yourself ‘Pretty Priya,’” Charlie is saying to Priya as they all wait eagerly to add their names to the board, Tao and Elle helping the other lane with any spelling mistakes or questions. Priya looks up at him with an excited grin and with fondness for the little girl, he types in her requested name on the computer screen.

“Oi, Charlie! Look who’s arrived!”

Charlie looks up from the computer at Isaac’s voice, immediately spotting Nick Nelson entering at the very other side of the room. Charlie quickly excuses himself, pushing Isaac to take his place as he marches over to greet Nick.

“You came!” he exclaims as he comes to a halt in front of Nick.

He’s dressed casually in a pair of nice darkwash jeans and a perfectly fitted green and blue jumper under his usual jacket, carrying a shiny purple gift bag at his side, stuffed with pink and purple wrapping paper. As Charlie appears in front of him, a broad grin melts across his features, brown eyes softening and posture perking up like a blooming rosebud.

“Of course!” he responds. “Am I the first to arrive?”

Charlie snorts, leading Nick over to where the rest of the group is. “You’re the last one by a while, actually,” he explains, gesturing.

Nick’s face heats up, but before he can offer anything beyond a simple apology, he is immediately bombarded by all of Maya’s classmates coming to greet him. Charlie discreetly takes Maya’s gift out of his hand and takes it over to the others while Nick greets his students politely.

Soon enough, the bowling begins and all the adults situate themselves at a couple of tables just behind the bowling lanes, talking amongst themselves as they watch their kids. Charlie occupies himself with watching the others around him, content in simply enjoying the atmosphere and the people around him, instead of needing to add to the excitement.

He watches Maya, Timothy and Hasini bickering over the scoreboard together, recognising himself in Maya’s frustrated pout or the folded arms; he watches two of the boys fighting over a neon green bowling ball until one of the mums pulls them apart; Elle talks a few of the adults into getting their own lane and soon Nick, Tao, Elle, Isaac and Imogen are playing against each other, arguing and laughing over bowling balls and entertaining the kids with their antics; Priya stuns the whole group when she gets a perfect strike, earning lots of applause and cheers from adults and children alike.

Isaac and Nick drag Charlie into their bowling game and soon Charlie is deep in the midst of his own bowling game, occasionally going at the same time as Maya so that everyone watches them with rapt attention. Nick and Tao argue playfully over who is better at bowling (Nick, but not by much) and Isaac gets 3 strikes in a row while Tao gets it in the gutter 4 times in a row without knocking any pins down. Nick and Elle share a bowl of chips between them and Isaac teaches a few of the kids how to bowl better when he spots them struggling and Charlie watches everyone with a permanent grin on his face.

“Brilliant! Almost a perfect shot!” Charlie exclaims as Nick celebrates knocking down all but 2 pins, arms spread wide in triumph as he wanders over with a grin. Charlie refrains from hugging him like he wishes he could, instead fist bumping him with a sheepish smile to the shiny wooden floor.

“If teaching fails, maybe I’ll go into professional bowling!”

“Alright, I never said you were that good, Nelson. Don’t let it go to your head,” Charlie teases, poking Nick in the arm.

Nick smiles even wider, poking his tongue out at Charlie cheekily. Charlie bites his lip, looking up at Nick with flushed cheeks. In the neon lights of the room, pink and blue flashes over Nick’s face, framing his angular features in colour, accentuating them even more than usual so that Charlie almost has to catch his breath.

“Excuse me, the master is coming to play,” announces Tao in a dramatic, bravado-filled voice as he pushes to the front with his yellow and black spotted ball. The children giggle in delight, watching him take aim with much drama.

“Come on, Tao! Do it already!” Charlie teases, rolling his eyes.

Tao takes aim, steps forwards, throws the ball in one sweeping motion and… Misses entirely. Taking out exactly one pin, the ball zips into the gutter with a clatter that has the kids squealing with laughter and glee and the adults teasing him ferociously. Tao stomps his feet and announces his ‘retirement’ before going to sulk on one of the colouful, overstuffed couches.

Once everyone’s games finishes (with Isaac and Priya being the reigning champions of their groups), the large group heads over to the party room for greasy pizza, chips and then cake. Everyone eagerly awaits their rainbow paper plates, the kids banging their fists on the plastic table and chanting for their food. Maya, sitting at the head of the table with a shiny gold crown, grins at all her classmates as she takes the first slice of pizza.

Once all the kids have been served, Charlie goes to join the other adults at the smaller table, dropping into the rickety metal chair next to Nick, deep in a conversation with Isaac about a book they both read in university. Without pausing his conversation, Nick gently drops a hand discreetly on Charlie’s knee once he sits beside him, clearly ignoring the bright flush this causes on Charlie’s face.

Once Isaac moves to speak with Sai on his other side, Nick turns to Charlie and they begin to chat casually between them, laughing at the kids’ antics at the other table or recounting things they saw earlier during the party. They laugh easily and tease each other, eating their lunch and half-ignoring the others around them.

Soon, Charlie reluctantly leaves Nick to help Imogen put 7 candles on the cake shaped like a multi-coloured bowling ball. Everyone sings happy birthday as he carries the cake carefully over to Maya at the head of the table, counting down from 7 until she blows out the candles with her whole face screwed up.

Charlie grins wider than anyone else, standing beside his daughter with a floaty, aching chest so full of love and light and cheer. He never envisioned this future for himself, not when he was a terrified teenager bullied for being gay nor when he lost the love of his life only a few years ago.

The sight of his daughter, surrounded by friends, blowing out candles on a sugary cake and grinning so much like her father has Charlie on the verge of tears as he claps along with everyone else. He ducks his head to hide his glistening eyes from the many onlookers, clapping despite the lump in his throat.

He’s glad that Tao took the liberty of filming and photographing the whole thing while Nick, instantly noticing Charlie’s emotional state, offers to help cut the cake for everybody.

When Charlie goes to sit down in his seat again with a small slice of cake, Nick takes his hand under the table, linking their fingers together and squeezing tightly. Charlie squeezes back, smiling gratefully before digging into his cake.

“This has been fun,” Nick says a few minutes later, halfway through his own cake slice. “Thank you again for inviting me.”

“It was nothing! I… I like spending time with you, even if it’s surrounded by screaming children and Tao having a tantrum,” Charlie responds, glancing around the room. Everyone is deep in conversation or their cake slices. “I’m sure you had other more fun things to do, so I’m glad you came.”

Nick snorts, shaking his head. “Honestly, I was planning to just read some books or catch up on Netflix,” says Nick. He glances around, pushing his half-finished plate to the side to lean towards Charlie, elbow on the table. “You know I like spending time with you, too, right? You’re pretty much my favourite person to spend time with.” He squeezes Charlie’s knee tightly, fingers digging gently into the bone.

Charlie closes his eyes, breathing deep. When he opens his eyes, Nick is still staring at him, wide eyed and sappy. “God, I like you so much, Nick. It’s ridiculous, actually.”

“Me too,” says Nick, grinning. “But we can be ridiculous together, yeah?”

“Sounds like a good plan,” Charlie murmurs.

Once everyone finishes their cakes, the party starts to separate slightly. While most of the kids get picked up by their parents and guardians, leaving with colourful goodie bags, thanking Charlie for having them, a few of the others stay and move to the arcade for the ‘after party.’
That is to say, only Charlie’s friends and their kids stay, going wild over the various games dotted around the place while the adults play their own games and keep half an eye on the few kids still lingering about at the party.

Isaac goes with Maya to one of the coin games, holding her up over the machine as she pushes coins inside; Tao goes with Hasini and Bianca to the dance machine, their voices carrying over the entire room as they shriek and sing along; Priya and Timothy face off in a shooter game; and Elle and Otis go with Hope and Autumn to the basketball machine.

Charlie beats Nick at 3 rounds of the Mario Kart machine and a Whack-A-Mole game and in retaliation, Nick absolutely slaughters him at air hockey. They sneak away from the rest of the group to grab slushies, moving to stand in a relatively deserted corner to enjoy their colourful frozen drinks.

“You feeling better, now?” Nick asks, wiping some of the bright blue of his drink off the bottom of his chin using the edge of his sleeve. He leans against the wall, eyes scanning the room briefly before returning to Charlie, eyebrows furrowed together a smidge.

“What do you mean?”

“Earlier, when everyone was singing to Maya,” says Nick, setting his drink down on a nearby table, “you seemed almost sad. I was worried you were going to cry, actually.”

Charlie’s cheeks burn and he places his own drink next to Nick’s. “Oh, that. It’s silly…” He looks down at the floor, fidgeting with the bottom of his shirt between his fingers.

Nick nudges their shoulders together, scooting closer almost imperecptibly. “Don’t give me that. I know you,” he murmurs. “What was up?” He knocks their toes together and links their pinkies together between them, out of sight from any passersby.

“I dunno. It’s just—Sometimes, I just look at how my life has turned out now and it’s hard to believe,” Charlie admits. “If you’d told me even a year ago that I’d be watching my daughter blowing out birthday candles surrounded by countless friends and having a secret rendezvous with one of her teachers, I would have never believed you. I never could have seen any of this for myself and I guess sometimes it just amazes me, you know? I never thought I could be this content.”

“I get that,” says Nick, squeezing their pinkies tighter. “Even I feel a bit foolish when I look at where I am now. I’m just so thankful that I found you and I get to be with you like this. Before I met you, I was just this lonely, goofy weirdo eating deliveries and ready meals alone with my dog. Look at us, now.”

“We really are a couple of fools, huh?” Charlie looks up at Nick and Nick looks right back, eyes full of affection and Charlie’s heart squeezes. He aches with the desire to kiss or hold him right there, but he is still so terrified of crossing that line with Nick that he holds himself back.

“I really want to kiss you right now,” Nick murmurs, reading Charlie’s mind.

“Really?”

“If you want to, yeah.”

Charlie looks around. Tao and Elle have moved on to playing a space shooter game; Isaac has Maya, Bianca and Hasini crowded around a claw machine; Otis teaches Timothy the proper way to play Mario Kart; Bianca and Hope play against each other on the dancing machine; Imogen helps Priya and Autumn with getting a prize with their tickets; Sai and Rooney share a bowl of chips over at another table, watching a group of teenagers bowling nearby. Nobody seems to pay any mind to Nick and Charlie in the corner together, so caught up in their own enjoyment.

And under the neon lights of the bowling alley and arcade, Charlie gets up on his toes and kisses Nick once again. Nick wraps his arms around his waist and pulls him in tighter, Charlie’s fingers reaching up to tangle in Nick’s hair as he pulls him just as close. They kiss, surrounded by the endless chatter and laughter, the whistles and sirens and bangs of the arcade, wrapped up in each other in their own little bubble as they kiss each other like the noises and the lights around them are a mere backdrop they hardly notice.

Charlie clings onto Nick under the pink and blue and yellow lights, pulling out of the kiss just for Nick to bury his face in the crook of Charlie’s neck as he hugs him just as fiercely as his kiss.

They pull apart not long after when the sounds of their friends carry over to them, people growing bored of the arcade and starting to head home. Charlie and Nick share a few glances with each other as Charlie says goodbye to the last stragglers, each one of Nick’s smiles like a promise he’ll keep safe.

Charlie, Nick, Tao, Elle, Isaac and Maya have a casual dinner at the bowling alley and when Maya starts to get tired from the long day, they head outside together. Tao and Elle bicker on their way to the car, Tao insisting he knows where he parked it and Nick offers to carry Maya to the car after she falls asleep in the booth.

Charlie lingers back, watching Isaac and Nick talking quietly, Nick supporting Maya on his hip with ease, holding her in his strong arms like his own child. He feels another swell of affection for the other man, more certain than ever before about him. Watching his utmost devotion and affection for his daughter, already so close with his other friends, Charlie knows that he will choose Nick until the end of time.

Charlie knows that no matter how many other troubles he faces, no matter how difficult raising Maya without her other dad is, no matter what, he made the right decision choosing Nick.

Chapter Text

A few months later, Maya officially finishes year 2. Just like always, Charlie goes to pick her up from the playground, the sun high in the sky between fluffy white clouds, along with the early summer warmth and the birds chirping overhead. As Charlie walks up to the playground, Maya hops off the monkey bars and runs over to Charlie, a big grin on her face and her dark hair flying behind her as always.

“Daddy! Daddy! I finished year 2!” she sings, slamming right into the fence with her hands on the bar. “Can we go for ice cream to celebrate?”

“I don’t see why not. It’s not every day a girl finishes year 2!” says Charlie, walking with her around the fence and through the gate. Sahar is chatting with some of the other PTA parents and Rooney, watching their kids playing on the playground before they break off for the summer.

“Charlie! There you are! Join us!” Sahar shouts, waving Charlie over to the group. “We were just debating going to that new ice cream parlour that opened up down the road from here. Care to join us?” When Charlie stops next to her, watching Maya going over to collect her bag, she loops her arm in Charlie’s with a soft smile.

Over the last few months, through the PTA meetings and other activities, Charlie has become quite close with Sahar and some of the other PTA members like Imogen and Sai. He’s especially fond of Sahar, who is much less loud and extroverted than many of the other PTA members and listens to all of his ideas with open ears.

“Ah, that explains why Maya asked me as soon as I got here,” says Charlie, smirking. “I’ve no idea where it is, but if I can follow someone’s car, we’d love to join.”

“That’s great!” exclaims Rooney, beaming.

“What’s great?”

Charlie, shockingly distracted by the group, hardly noticed Nick wandering over to join the group. He looks to Nick at his voice, sharing a soft smile. Sahar catches the look and smirks, being one of the only PTA members (aside from Imogen and Sai) who knows about his and Nick’s relationship officially. Sure, Charlie’s pretty certain most of the other parents and teachers at least suspect it, but they’ve never confirmed either way.

“Oh, Mr. Nelson! We were just talking about going to Scoops, the new ice cream place down the road!” says one of the other parents, Veronica, an older mum who has 3 other kids apart from her child in year 2 with Maya. “Care to join us?”

“Ooh, yes, please come! It would be a lovely way to celebrate such a wonderful year with you as the teacher,” says Rooney, grabbing Nick’s arm and bouncing it up and down.

Nick scratches the back of his head, biting his lip. “I’d hate to intrude,” he says sheepishly.

“Nonsense,” says Charlie. “You’re coming with us.”

“Exactly. I’m coming too, so it’s hardly a teacher-free event,” adds Sahar, pushing Nick’s shoulder.

And so, everyone heads to their respective cars and their kids and head just around the corner to Scoops.

It’s a small, family owned shop decorated with pastel everywhere and a big pink ice cream cone hanging over the door with the name in pale blue. The interior is designed in the retro 1950s style of an American milkshake parlour with its striped booths, swivel chairs along the bar and various photographs depicting famous stars like Elvis, the Beatles and the Jackson Five. They all pile into the shop, taking up tables and queueing up to pick their ice creams of choice.

“What’re you thinking?” Nick murmurs, appearing just next to Charlie as he waits at the counter, scanning the various flavours. There’s about a hundred of them and Charlie is slightly overwhelmed by the choices. “That bubblegum one sounds good.”

Charlie peers over at the lurid blue and pink ice cream labelled ‘Bubblegum in your tum’. Charlie screws up his face, wincing away from Nick in horror. “You never cease to amaze and horrify me with your taste in food and drinks,” he exclaims, still grimacing.

“What? It’s good! I have a very refined palate!”

Charlie rolls his eyes and moves up in line. “I think I’ll just get the double chocolate,” he says, pointing at the ‘Double Bubble Chocolate Trouble’. He turns to Maya next to him. “What do you want, bug?”

“Can I get half vanilla, half strawberry, please? I can’t decide,” she asks, giving him doe eyes.

“Alright. But only because it’s a special treat,” says Charlie, knowing he’d likely give in on any other day as well. He orders their two ice creams with the teenage shop worker, dressed in a striped turquoise shirt and hat combo and then goes to pay.

As another teenager places their three ice creams on the counter, Maya grabs her own instantly and runs over to sit with some of her friends on the other side of the shop. Charlie looks down at Nick’s ice cream, an atrocious bright mess which contrasts with his simple brown.

“How do you always manage to pick the worst, most ridiculous flavours ever?” Charlie teases, wincing at Nick’s multi-coloured atrocity. “This is even worse than that pistachio and marmalade cupcake you made me try.”

Charlie still shivers at the memory of the obscene disaster Nick attempted to give him for his birthday a few months back.

“Let me try yours, then!” Without waiting for a response, Nick tucks his spoon into Charlie’s and sticks it in his mouth. After a pause, he sighs heavily and hangs his head. “Come on, we’ll just have to share, then.”

Charlie snorts, following him to join the others at the table. “I told you I was right, sweetheart,” he murmurs, shaking his head fondly. “As always.”

“Ooh, nice choice, Nick! Bubblegum for the win!” exclaims Rooney, holding up her own blue abomination.

Sahar and Charlie share a look of disapproval.

“You know,” says Nick a few minutes later, interrupting the group’s discussion about someone on the PTA getting a divorce soon. “I’d just like to thank all of you for being such good parents and colleagues this year. I couldn’t have asked for a better cohort this year and if it wasn’t for how people like you guys raised your wonderful kids, that wouldn’t be the case. It’s been a good year.”

“Aww, how cheesy,” says Rooney, resting her chin on her hand and fluttering her eyelashes dramatically.

“I know, but it’s true!” says Nick, putting down his second spoon in the chocolate he’s sharing with Charlie. He spins in his seat and faces the table of 7 year olds enjoying their ice cream. “You guys have been a great year group this year. I’ll miss you and all your other classmates a lot next year.”

“I’m gonna miss having you as a teacher,” says Bianca seriously, her glasses falling to the edge of her nose. She has a bit of the ‘Strawberry Dreamcake’ smudged on her chin, bright pink and red.

“I’ve certainly got some plus sides to you not being her teacher,” Charlie whispers to Nick, hooking his ankle around Nick’s for a split second.

Nick’s face goes completely scarlet, but everyone else is too distracted with discussing memories to notice.

~~~

Later that evening, Charlie drops Maya off at the Verma house for a sleepover with Hasini and Hope to celebrate the summer holiday. He stands on the front porch for a few minutes, chatting to Sai, who he hasn’t seen for a little while because of some business trip he went on. He asks him how his work has been going and they talk about their summer plans, undercut by the distant shrieks and giggles of the girls down the hall.

“It was nice talking, Sai,” says Charlie, stepping backwards down the two steps to the pavement. “Nick and I are going to celebrate the end of the year, though, so.”

Sai shoos him away with a knowing smile. “Have fun, you two! Tell him I say hi!” he calls, waving at Charlie as he heads for the car.

Charlie drives straight to Nick’s house, already having gotten dressed before he went to drop off Maya. He pauses in the driveway, looking at his reflection in the rearview mirror. He does one last hair check, trying to smooth it out to the best of his ability, then he pushes open the door and walks up to Nick’s house.

When he rings the bell, he’s greeted by the barks of Nellie. Not a second later, Nick appears in front of him, pushing Nellie back with his foot with a smirk.

“Hello, hello, hello,” says Nick, stepping aside to let Charlie past him into the house.

“Hey, sorry I’m late. I got caught up talking to Sai when I was dropping off Maya,” says Charlie, shutting the door behind him.

“I don’t mind. Darcy and Tara called me, so it’s fine,” says Nick, leaning in for a kiss. Charlie responds eagerly, immediately reaching up to hold onto Nick’s biceps.

For a moment, they stand in Nick’s front hall, kissing each other with eagerness, like coming home after a long day at work. They’re both so used to it by now, months on from their first one, but they still move against each other with the same enthusiasm of the very beginning of their relationship. They haven’t lost any of the spark or earnestness from their first kisses, of that Charlie is thankful.

Slowly, Nick backs Charlie against the arch leading to his front room, kissing him firmly, one hand gripping possessively to his waist while the other pushes its way up into Charlie’s hair. Charlie grunts in surprise, pulling Nick closer by his back, ignoring his spine digging into the wall. The tips of his fingers dip into the waistband of Nick’s trousers as he lets Nick kiss the daylights out of him, pressed against his wall.

So focused on one another, they forget their surroundings, caught up in their kissing. As Charlie tries to shift under Nick’s tight, tender grip, he knocks his head into the corner of a picture frame, almost knocking it to the floor. He startles, hitting his head on the wall in surprise.

Nick pulls back slightly, cupping the back of his head with a bashful, apologetic smile. “Sorry, darling,” he blurts, reaching up to fix the painting. Charlie smirks and moves farther from the painting, dragging Nick towards him once again.

“God, I love this so much,” Nick murmurs into his lips, kissing down his jaw and neck. “You’re just so wonderful, Char.”

Charlie tilts his head to give him better access, laughing breathlessly. “Speak for yourself. You’re the perfect one, here,” he says, clutching his upper arms.

Nick shakes his head, burying his face in Charlie’s collar. “No, you are,” he says into the fabric of Charlie’s button down, buttoned almost to the top button. He pulls back, still holding his hip. “We’ve still got another hour and a half until the reservation. Shall we fill the time, perhaps?”

“Whatever could you mean, Nicholas?” Charlie asks innocently, even as he follows Nick up the stairs two at a time.

~~~

Almost 2 hours later, a few minutes late to the reservation, Charlie and Nick hurry into the restaurant, hand in hand. Charlie blurts out his surname and they follow the host to their table at the back, hidden in a booth. Charlie picked this place himself, having gone here countless times since moving back to the area a few years ago. Nick usually lets him pick the restaurants as he doesn’t mind where he goes, but Charlie feels more comfortable controlling where they eat. It’s something simple and yet so meaningful to Charlie.

“This place is nice,” Nick remarks, putting his jacket to the side and looking around the dimly lit restaurant. He flicks his finger over the flickering candle next to them, between the salt and pepper shakers and in front of a small pot of magenta flowers.

“You say that every time,” says Charlie, opening up his menu even though he already decided on his order before he even booked. He gets the same thing every time, anyway.

“I know, but it’s always true.” Nick ignores his menu, cupping his chin in both hands, elbows resting on the table. He watches Charlie with soft, gentle eyes and Charlie forces himself to look back at his menu, cheeks flushed under Nick’s fond gaze. “I’d never doubt your taste, Char. You picked me, after all.”

Charlie hums, turning the page of his menu idly. “Oh, I picked you, did I? Like picking a puppy from a litter?” he asks, feigning innocence.

“Exactly. Got it in one.”

The waiter comes to take their orders, cutting the conversation short. Charlie and Nick decide on a wine to share and order their food, Charlie being quite particular about how his is cooked. Nick waits patiently as he asks for replacements or removals from the dish until he’s satisfied. After verifying, the waiter leaves them alone again.

Charlie sets his menu to the side and crosses his legs, steepling his fingers. He looks around the restaurant and then back at Nick. “You know, this place opened the day after the funeral? Like, literally the very next day,” he says casually. Nick’s raised eyebrows give him away easily. “After his parents didn’t even come to the funeral because they cut him off, I was really upset and stumbled across this place, announcing their grand opening. I was too distraught to cook, so naturally we’ve eaten here a lot since then.”

“Wow. I didn’t know this place meant so much to you,” says Nick, tilting his head. He reaches across the white tablecloth and takes one of Charlie’s hands, thumbing the back of his hand. “I’m honoured you took me here, then.”

Charlie smiles at their joined hands and squeezes gently. “I actually brought you here tonight for a reason. And not just to celebrate ending the school year,” he says, looking up, heart picking up pace.

Nick blinks, leaning closer. He hums in interest.

“I want to tell Maya about us,” he blurts.

“Really?”

Charlie knows that they probably could have told Maya about their relationship sooner. As talkative as she is, she’s always been good at keeping the really important secrets, so he never had any fears of the rest of her class finding out through her. But the thing is, with this being his first relationship since her dad died, Charlie wanted to take it slow and to make sure that he was sure about Nick before telling Maya anything. He didn’t want to confuse or upset her if he wasn’t 100% certain about Nick and if it ended up not working out in the beginning, he didn’t want to make Maya’s life any harder than it had to be.

So, naturally, he waited to tell her for months.

And Nick was always perfectly okay with it, letting him take the lead in any decisions they made in their relationship. He waited for Charlie to open up more about his life and his difficult childhood and his eating disorders, patient and calm with every step of the way. So, now, he was ready.

“Yeah, I do. If you do, of course,” says Charlie. “I’m really serious about you, us. This relationship. I wouldn’t tell Maya if I wasn’t sure this could last.”

“Me neither,” Nick whispers, fingers twitching against Charlie’s. “I really fucking love you, Charlie. Like, so much. I want to tell Maya if you do, too.”

“Great! We can tell her together, then. Maybe you can come around for dinner at ours or something and we can tell her,” Charlie suggests.

“Sounds like a plan.”

Decision made, they move away from the serious topics and onto their usual, casual conversations. They talk all the way through dinner and then dessert, sharing a bottle of red between them, laughing and talking easily like they’ve known each other their whole lives. Nick tells him about the gifts some of his students gave him and the game he finished the day off with and Charlie tells him about a horrible spelling error in one of his manuscripts, as well as the boring, endless one he had to read through as well. They talk about the upcoming year for Maya, their plans for the summer, their favourite memories from the last school year and everything in between.

By the time the waiter brings over the bill, they are both pleasantly tipsy and giggly, fighting over who gets to pay until Nick inevitably insists. Then, hand in hand, leaning against each other and laughing like fools, they step out into the breezy night air and book a taxi to Nick’s house.

Charlie thanks the driver and drags Nick out behind him when they pull up to his house twenty minutes later. He pulls him all the way up to the house, through the front door and up to his room where he can have his way with him.

~~~

Charlie stands at the stove, stirring a wooden spoon through the stir fry on the pan, when the doorbell rings. Maya, sitting in the living room on her iPad, hops up to go answer the door, the cat trotting behind. Charlie turns the heat down on the stove as he hears a pair of voices chatting to each other down the hall. By the time he turns away from the stove, Nick is following Maya into the kitchen with a smirk.

“Daddy, why is Mr. Nelson coming for dinner?” asks Maya, leaning against the back of one of the kitchen chairs.

“I’ll explain in a minute,” says Charlie, turning back to the stove to start plating up the stir fry for the three of them. “Why don’t you both sit down? Food will be out in just a sec.”

He hears the scraping of the chairs on the wood behind him as he carefully portions the noodles, vegetables and chicken into three bowls, careful not to spill any or mess up with the proportions. He gives Nick the biggest portion, followed by his own and then a smaller portion on a purple plate for Maya. He sets the pan and spoon in the sink and carefully carries the plates over to the table, which Maya already set earlier on.

“Careful, sweetie, it’s only just off the stove,” says Charlie as Maya grabs her fork, ready to dive in.

She pouts, slouching in her chair and eyeing the steam coming up from her food. Charlie and Nick share a smile across from each other. Blowing on his forkful, Charlie starts to eat his dinner, leaning over so that he doesn’t spill.

They eat in silence for the first few minutes, just enjoying their food and the peaceful company. While Charlie doesn’t miss the confused glances Maya keeps throwing Nick’s way, she keeps quiet and doesn’t complain, which he is incredibly thankful for.

“So, er, Maya,” Nick starts, putting his fork and knife down on the plate, “how’s your summer going so far? Do you miss school at all?”

Maya shrugs, shovelling a forkful of noodles into her mouth so that her chin is stained with the sauce. Charlie rolls his eyes and grabs her napkin to wipe her chin. “I like not having to get up early,” she says with a shrug, shoving Charlie’s hand with the napkin away. Nick snorts into his glass of water. “And I don’t miss homework. But you were fun, I guess.”

“Oh, really? You miss me then?” Nick teases, raising his eyebrows.

“Daddy, is that why Mr. Nelson is here?” Maya turns to Charlie with furrowed brows. “To ask me if I miss him teaching me?”

Charlie sets his cutlery down and shakes his head. He glances at Nick, who nods minutely in his direction. “Well, no, sweetheart. He’s actually here to help me tell you some… news,” he says slowly, carefully.

“I don’t have to do year 2 again, do I?” asks Maya, eyes wide as though the idea horrifies her.

“No, Maya, you’re fine,” says Charlie, smirking. Maya blinks at him, still confused. Charlie sighs and leans over, covering one of her hands on the table with his own. “Maya, you know I love you more than anything in the world, right?”

“Sure.” She shoves another forkful of noodles in her mouth without pause.

Charlie decides to laugh at that response later. He continues, “And you know that your Papa loved you just as much, yes?” She nods her head, looking down at her plate for a moment. She takes another mouthful and narrows her eyes at Nick. Charlie takes a deep breath, glancing at Nick for support. “You see, sweetheart, Mr. Nelson and I are dating each other.”

“You’re dating?”

Charlie glances at Nick, swallowing. He nods faintly, feeling his heart pounding in his chest. He casts his eyes up at the ceiling, steeling himself for the worst. He looks back at Maya once again and she’s still staring at him, a bit of sauce on her cheek again. Instead of responding verbally, Charlie merely bobs his head up and down, his voice catching in his throat. He rehearsed this conversation hundreds of times in his head ever since he decided to tell her, and yet now his mind is a blank slate.

“That’s it?” she asks, tilting her head to the side.

“W-what do you mean?” asks Charlie, his voice hollow and confused. He peers at Nick. This certainly wasn’t in any of the thousand scripts Charlie planned in his head that she could possibly react.

“I thought you were gonna tell me you were sick or we were moving or something,” says Maya. “I already knew about you guys.”

“Seriously?!” Charlie blurts, his voice rising several pitches. When he glances at Nick for help, he’s laughing silently into his plate, eyes screwed up and shoulders shaking up and down. Charlie kicks him under the table and gives him a Look to stop him.

Maya nods her head again, pausing to eat another forkful of noodles. “I saw Mr. Nelson’s car parked out front a million times, Daddy,” she says simply. “And I saw him coming out of the toilet in just his pants one time. Papa used to do that, too.”

Charlie’s jaw drops open. He turns to Nick, giving him an ‘are you serious?’ look. He feels as though the world has tilted sideways, knocking him over and leaving him on the edge of a crumbling cliff. He sooner imagined Maya flipping the dinner table with all their food than for her to already have known it was happening the whole time. She even saw Nick in his bloody underwear and neither of them ever said anything? Did Nick already know she knew this whole time and just let Charlie torture himself for weeks over whether or not Maya would be okay with them dating? He almost felt betrayed.

“Wait, so you already knew Nick and I were dating? And neither of you said anything?” He darts a glare at Nick, who raises his hands up in defence.

“Well, I definitely did not know she saw me in my pants, I’d like to just add,” says Nick, setting aside his glass. “I didn’t know she knew anything either.”

“I thought you were embarrassed, Daddy!” she exclaims defensively, folding her arms. “And all my friends have been teasing me about you guys for ages already.”

Charlie drops his head on the edge of the table, his hair narrowly avoiding getting right in his dish. Nick leans over to move the plate away from any stray curls. He shakes his head against the wood, groaning into his lap. He rolls his head and shifts until his chin rests on the table, looking over to Maya as she calmly finishes her dinner. His own plate lies forgotten, the last of his food going cold.

“So, you’re okay with it? You don’t… have any questions? You’re not upset?” asks Charlie, biting his lip, searching Maya’s face for any sign of discomfort.

She shrugs, poking her fork at her empty plate. “I guess not,” she murmurs. “I know he can’t replace Papa. But I like Mr. Nelson, so it’s fine.” She shrugs again, lifting both her hands into the air by her shoulders. She shoots Nick a warning look, as though reminding him exactly where he stands.

Charlie heaves a sigh of relief and almost falls out of his chair. “I’m so sorry we kept this from you, Maya. Or tried to, at least,” says Charlie. “I just wanted to make sure we were both really sure about the relationship before letting you know. I didn’t want to confuse or upset you.”

“I know,” she says. “It’s okay, Daddy. I still love you.”

Well, thank fuck for that, Charlie thinks to himself. He turns to Nick, who’s grinning so wide his eyes almost disappear. But he can still see beads of tears in both his eyes as Nick glances between Charlie and his daughter, as though he loves both of them just the same. It makes Charlie’s heart flip upside down, inside out and tie itself in a knot, his entire body glowing with fondness for this man that stumbled into his life.

He thinks about the last few months of his life and everything that has changed. He thinks back to just a year ago when he was barely back on his feet, only just starting to get himself up out of bed and showering regularly. He thinks of all the pain and the grief and the loss that hollowed him out after his husband passed away, all the sleepless nights and the tears shed over hours and the weight he lost until he was sure he was barely more than a lifeless, hollow shell. And then, like a sun rising over the horizon to bring a new dawn, Nick wandered into his life, bright and full of life, filling him up until Charlie almost forgot what it was like to be so lost and empty in life. He brought the rain after a drought, the stability of a mountain and the safety of the warmest embrace.

Sure, he had his fair share of bad days still. He still struggled to eat or to sleep some days and it sometimes hurt to look at his own daughter without seeing her dad in every part of her. But now that he had Nick, his guiding light and his true North ready to face any challenge they met, it got a little easier. And he wasn’t just kind and perfect for Charlie, he was also a bright spot in Maya’s life, helping her through her shitty classmates and her struggles with history and art class and always understanding her and bringing a smile to her face. Charlie brought comfort and company to Nick’s lonely life and stabilised his hectic life both in and out of school.

“You know, I’m not your teacher anymore so you can call me Nick,” says Nick, leaning back in his chair, smiling down at Maya.

She bursts into a fit of giggles, covering her mouth. Nick turns to Charlie with a bemused look and Charlie just shrugs.

“No offence, Mr. Nelson, but that would be really weird.”

Charlie looks between Nick and Maya with a smile. Nick joins in on his daughter’s laughter and Charlie’s heart swells, looking between his two favourite fools in front of him.

He couldn’t have asked for a better pair to be a fool with if he tried.