Archive of Our Own ^beta

Three days later after getting rescued by Sheppard and Radek. A tired Mckay passed out in the jumper so in the infirmary Rodney woke up to Carson staring down at him. “Hello, Rodney glad to see you are awake.”
 It felt like ages coming in every hour to see if his best friend was awake.

“Carson Hi, feel tired glad still here.” His words didn't form how he wanted them still felt so tired.

Luckily Carson already knew that as he spoke, “It's because of your head injury.” He pointed to Rodney’s head which he had stitched up. “You need more rest.” That was something Rodney didn't want to hear as resting was boring in his mind.

“Where is everyone? I thought they would be here." He said roughly trying to sit up and look around the room sad not to see them.

“It’s midnight they will be here in the morning.” Most of the team with Elizabeth kept swapping out during the day. “They have not left your side since you got back, I ordered them out.” That felt more like it he missed them all so much, “Oh ok might try to sleep some more, how long before I can leave?” He didn’t like being the one in the bed in the infirmary.

Carson smiled knowing Rodney would ask right away. “Give it a few days we will see how you are doing want to keep an eye on you.”

Out of everyone when he heard what happened Carson was worried. “I was so scared. I thought, never mind thank you.” Rodney lightly touched Carson’s hand next to him they had been friends for a long time. Even if he felt scared or uneasy, Rodney felt assured being under Carson's care made him feel safe.

“I can’t imagine what that was like, but you are home now rest I’ll be back.” Said Carson calmly while checking Rodney’s vitals which were fine.

He left the room briskly after Rodney fell asleep everything catching up on him. The next thing he woke up to sunlight very bright and warm. Sheppard was there looking down smiling in his quirky way. Teyla was with Ronon standing at the end of the bed gazing happily at him.

Teyla wore her usual purple stunning outfit it was more of a casual outfit. Ronon was in his normal loose maroon, t-shirt with comfortable brown pants. John looked tired and ragged and also had messy hair which was normal. He wore a black military outfit which Rodney thought made him look dashing.

“Morning sleepyhead sorry we weren’t here when you woke up last night.” Carson feeling cornered informed them about Rodney waking up earlier and told the team about it.

“It’s ok Carson told me it was pretty late I was tired.”

“Still look pretty tired to me, how are you feel Mckay?” said Ronon in his stern manner, while eyeing Sheppard wondering what he was thinking.

Carson was busy checking others while the team spoke. “I’m doing fine, I slept and got some stitches. Carson wants me to stay for a few days to make sure.” It was better to be safe than sorry so if Mckay had to stay in they would all help.


“You’ll be hanging out with us in no time.” Said Teyla in her motherly voice that Rodney missed hearing while being stuck.

“I hope being stuck in a sinking jumper was no fun at all.” Sheppard frowned feeling guilty though he wasn’t sure as to why he felt that.

“We kept looking for you Radek was in charge he was the hero.” Great that’s all he needed more competition Rodney was a genius.

John chuckled knowing how Rodney would respond. “Don’t tell him that, it will go to his head Colonel.” Even so, Sheppard didn’t care they found Rodney because of him.

After finishing checking others Carson came back, “Ok you all should leave so my patient can get some rest.” John frowned he didn’t want to leave Rodney at all.

“We will see you soon bye Rodney sleep well.”

“Bye Mckay.” They waved bye both left leaving Sheppard alone with Rodney. Carson speaks. “Just a few minutes Colonel he needs some more rest.” He looks sternly at them knowing they probably talk for a while.

“No worries doc I promise.” Carson grinned sheepishly hoping they would talk. He left John pulled up a seat near the bed placing his hands near it. Silence happened for a while then John spoke up, “You had me worried, I’m glad we found you in time.” Mckay was glad as it sucked being alone in the jumper.

A sudden flash of being pushed into the safety of the jumper. Mckay momentarily shut his eyes at the thought he spoke, “Sorry about Griffith. I didn’t know what he was planning. he saved me I wish I could thank him.” The memory was forever burnt into his brain of being saved having survivor's guilt unsure what to do about it.

An undefinable tension rose in the air John knew what to say, “It’s not your fault Rodney, he made his choice he was brave till the end.”

Even though it was true it didn’t make him feel better. “I hated being stuck, my mind kept playing tricks on me hallucinations,” Mckay said looking at his hand on the bed not wanting to look at Sheppard. He did think about his Sam hallucination and wondered what John would think if he knew.

“Hallucinations have a way of helping us when we need them.” He had his fair share of them being a soldier after injuries they helped.

John placed his hand on the bed feeling scared to do more. Mckay moved his hand ever so closer speaking, “Yeah I guess they do thank you for saving me.” It was a team effort everyone played their part in the rescue. Even though it was morning John knew he had things to do, “It wasn’t just me but you’ll welcome perhaps, I should go now.” He wanted to stay a few moments silence hung in the air waiting.

Mckay abruptly speaks out, “Wait! um, there’s something I want to tell you.” His eyes were full of hope while staring at John.

“You can tell me anything no matter what I’ll listen.” He meant it so patiently John waited to hear what Rodney had to say. Mckay made him nervous he spoke, “Being there I felt like life is too short not to tell people how we feel.”

That sounded familiar John wasn’t sure where Mckay went on. “What I’m trying to say is I know you might not be able to say.” He kept tripping over his words, feeling all choked up when he would look at Sheppard. But this was it come on Rodney you can do this his mind said feeling like now was the time.

“However here goes nothing, John I’ve fallen in love with you.” It was like everything felt right with the universe like Atlantis was singing. Yes, Rodney was in love with him it was the best feeling in the whole wide world, like riding a Ferris Wheel several times going way up high. Like being a pilot getting to fly through space, stepping into the Stargate feeling a whoosh of being able to touch the heavens that way.

Yeah, only in his dreams did this happen now John spoke. “You love me that way?”
 He didn't need to say that as John felt like the answer was plain to see. “Of course I do. How could I not be in love with you?” He wanted to go to the tallest part of Atlantis and scream it at the top of his lungs. “RODNEY MCKAY LOVES HIM.” A stupid smirk came on his face it made people swoon.

“I never see this coming. I’m in love with you too I just never thought.” These two were completely hopeless Atlantis was saying feeling annoyed and overjoyed.

“Never thought what John?” Mckay's voice rang out again waiting.

Mckay Wondered what John was thinking, “That you liked guys or me, I guess I was wrong.” For the first time, it was ok everything was great.
 The air in the room felt lighter full of love, “I know with DADT, we can’t do anything about it I just wanted you to know.” Finally. However, damn it to hell if John was going to let some stupid out-of-date rules stop him from love.

After a minute he moved his hand onto Rodney’s speaking. “DADT is a factor though, I don’t always follow the rules.” Rodney knew it was one of the many things he loved about Sheppard.

“But it’s important I don’t want you to risk your career for me.” With that, John leaned in close to Mckay claiming his lips in a kiss. It was a perfect moment for them only their lips meeting each other's John thought life was indeed, too short.