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Mike Wheeler was in over his head. He knew that as the large man who sat across from him on the couch frowned and crossed his legs. Perhaps he should’ve been honest. Maybe he’d understand. But even if this guy was getting paid to listen and give advice, Mike wasn’t sure he could take the truth. Wait. Mike was paying this man to give him advice. Yet here he was lying to his face and therefore not at all getting his money’s worth. Yeah, he was definitely making this harder than it had to be. 

“So,” the therapist said, “you’re upset because your best friend followed you to New York?”

Mike groaned. “No. Also, he’s my former best friend. We haven’t talked in, like, a year and a half. Plus, he didn’t follow me. He followed his brother, Jonathan, who goes to NYU.” 

The man nodded. “Okay. So, why’re you upset?” 

“I- I’m not upset per se. I’m…shocked. Confused. I don’t know. We left it on a weird note.” 

“How so?” 

Mike knew he couldn’t elaborate on that for a number of reasons. So, he supposed, what was one more twist of the truth? “Well, I don’t know. We kinda…have that shared trauma thing going on, you know?”
“A trauma bond, yes, you mentioned that,” the man said, then took a sip of his coffee. 

“Yeah. So, we’ve been through everything together but…we started to drift apart.” Mike furrowed his brows together in thought. “And it was really weird. Because Will had always been like a constant in my life. Then, suddenly he was getting a date to the prom and I was mad and-”

“Why were you mad he got a date to the prom?” The man knitted his eyebrows together.

Shit. Shouldn’t have said that. “Well- I- uh… It- it wasn’t like I was mad, I was just annoyed. You don’t know Will. He’s never really had a crush . At least not one he’s told me about. He’s never dated anyone. And it’s not that he’s not attractive because believe me when I tell you he is. Girls were constantly hitting on him throughout highschool. He just…was never a relationship guy I guess. So, it just felt different for him to have a date. It was weird. It’s not like I really cared. I just thought it was strange. Really.” 

The man eyed him suspiciously. Yeah, Mike really shouldn’t have let himself ramble like that. 

“Right.” Mike’s therapist leaned forward. “It had nothing to do with the fact that you wanted to hangout with him?”

Swallowing, Mike shifted uncomfortably. “N- no. It wasn’t like that. I- it wasn’t.” It most definitely was. 

“So, you’re saying you didn’t have the tiniest bit of jealousy when seeing him with someone else?” 

He quickly shook his head. “No. No, of course not. I just- I- I missed him. And I know it sounds stupid because we were living in the same town at the time but I did. Like I said, we drifted apart. And it just hurt that he wasn’t around anymore and instead was hanging out with some girl.”

The therapist sat back. “So, you were jealous,” he stated rather than asked. Mike flushed and opened his mouth only for no sound to come out. Shit. He was doomed. 

—

It was two weeks before prom and Hawkins High was buzzing with excitement. The little town of Hawkins, Indiana had returned to normal after nearly five years of crazy happenings. Everyone could finally exhale that breath they’d been holding. It was spring and graduation was just around the corner for the seniors. That meant this was the last time the party would all be together for a while. 

El would be staying in Indiana near Joyce and Hopper and attend a community college near there. Max (who woke up from her coma two years prior) would be moving to California near some of her relatives. Lucas would be attending a college in Oregon, making sure Max knew he was only a 13 hour drive away. Dustin was going to major in biological science at a school in Utah that Suzie was also attending. Will was applying to about every art school in the country. Which, based on his portfolio, was going to leave him with a lot of options because he was going to get accepted into all of them.

And then there was Mike. Mike didn’t know what to do. Everyone was splitting up, going their own ways. Of course, he wasn’t the only one who found this fact devastating. They were all a little down about it. It’s just that Mike thought it might be easier. Maybe he’d be ready when the time came for the party to break up. But he wasn’t ready at all. Change sucked. 

Everyone knew change sucked though. That’s why they decided they were going to have the best night at prom. 

“I trust El to pick out something nice for me to wear,” Max said one day at lunch as Mike took a seat next to Will.

El grinned. “Don’t worry. You’ll look bitchin’.” 

“What’re we talking about?” Mike asked.

“Prom,” Will answered flatly. 

“You always look bitchin’,” Lucas said to Max, giving her a peck on the lips. Mike fake gagged which was only seen by Will who chuckled and shook his head. 

Max smiled. “Aw, I know.” 

“We’re all going, right? To prom?” El asked. 

Dustin shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t have a date.” 

“Same,” Mike and Will said at the same time. 

“So what?” Max chimed in. “We can go as a group. This is our senior prom, guys.” 

Will groaned. “What’s the big deal anyway? We’ve had other dances.”

“Yeah,” Mike agreed. And he didn’t just agree because Will was his best friend and he agreed with him on everything, but also because it was a good point. 

“Guys,” Lucas said, “did you miss the part where it’s our senior prom? We’re never gonna get another. This is our last year of high school. We might as well make it memorable.” 

“I think the rest of high school was memorable enough,” Will mumbled. 

“Okay, okay. I’ll go. You’re right, Lucas, and this is kinda the last big night before we all split up and go our own ways,” Dustin said. 

“Exactly,” Max said. The rest of the party turned to Mike and Will. 

El looked between the two. “Well?” 

Mike glanced at Will who frowned in thought. “I guess so…,” Will said finally. 

“Mike?” El asked. 

Mike sighed. “Okay, I’m in.” 

A week before prom Mike regretted that decision with his whole being. He was leaving biology when he spotted Will across the hall. He raised a hand to wave but stopped before his name left his tongue. Will was talking to some girl- Leslie, Mike thought her name was- from the trigonometry class they shared. 

Leslie was blonde and wore blue eyeshadow, 20 layers of lip gloss, and mini skirts. She was pretty and you could identify that signature laugh anywhere. The laugh she was giving Will at that moment as she lightly shoved his shoulder and made it seem like he was the most charming, funniest person ever. (Which he was but Mike was the only person allowed to think that.) Mike tightened his grip on the books in his arms. 

Finally, she left Will to put his books away in his locker in peace. Mike approached him then. 

“Hey,” he said. 

Will looked up. “Oh, hey.” 

“What was that about?” Mike asked cooly, leaning against the locker next to Will’s. 

“What, Leslie? It was nothing. She just…,” Will paused and bent down to grab a textbook from the bottom of his locker, “kinda asked me to prom.”

Mike’s eyes widened. “What?”

“Yeah. It was kinda last minute and out of nowhere.” 

“Did you- did you say yes?” There was no way. 

Will glanced at him. “Yes.” Mike’s jaw actually dropped. Will continued. “I mean, it’s not like I had a date. Max is going with Lucas, El is going with that guy James, and I know you and Dustin aren’t going with anyone but I don’t really wanna sit on the sidelines. Plus, I don’t think she had anyone else to go with. So, I just thought, why not?”

Was he serious? Why not? Why not?! Mike could think of a hundred reasons why not. For one, he’d agreed to go with the group. Sure, Max, Lucas, and El had dates. But this was different. This was Will. Okay, there was that one time at the Snowball that Will had danced with a girl. But that wasn’t really a date or anything. Plus, Mike had encouraged him to dance with her. (He’d never make that mistake again.) 

Maybe Mike was also a little hurt because he’d planned on hanging out with Will all night. That wouldn’t be a possibility now that Will would have a date. 

Mike opened his mouth and all that came out was, “Oh.” 

The bell rang and Will shut his locker. “I’ll see you later.” Mike stood there for a moment as Will walked off to class. Shit. 

—

The night of the prom came and Mike put on his stuffy suit and tie. He had thought about trying to get out of it. However, he’d already agreed to go and it was kind of too late to back out. 

“Mike! Lucas is here!” Mike’s mom called from downstairs. 

“Okay!” he yelled back. He took one more look in the mirror and attempted straightening out his curls once again. He hurried down the stairs where his mom and Lucas waited. 

“Oh, Mike,” his mom said. “You look great.” 

He could feel his cheeks warm. “Thanks.”

“Let me just…” She started to fix his tie but Mike pulled away. 

“Mom,” he groaned. 

“I know, I know. Sorry. Have fun, okay?” 

Mike nodded. “See ya.” He walked out the door after Lucas. “Where’s Dustin?” he asked in the car.

“He’s going to meet us there. Something about having dinner with his mom or something,” Lucas chuckled. 

They arrived at the Byers’ and Joyce invited them in. “El and Max are just finishing up in her room,” she said. 

Will walked in and Mike’s breath caught. He looked… different. A good kind of different. Handsome. 

“Hey, guys,” Will said, looking between them. 

“Hey,” Lucas said. 

Mike slowly moved his gaze up Will until he met his eyes. He blushed, realizing he’d been staring too long. “You look… good. ” 

Will smiled. “Thanks. You do too.” The doorbell rang and Will moved to open it. “Hey, Leslie, come in.” 

Mike forgot she existed. Goddamn it. 

She walked in, smiling brighter than the diamonds on her dress. “You look handsome,” she giggled. I thought it first, Mike thought as he glared at her. 

“You- you look beautiful,” he smiled back. Mike wanted to gag. Then, as if just remembering Mike and Lucas existed, he turned to them. “Oh, Leslie, these are my friends, Mike and Lucas.” 

“Hi,” she said, giving them a small wave.

“Hey,” Lucas responded. 

Mike said nothing, just nodded slightly.

“Um, well, me and Leslie are gonna take my car, so I’ll see you guys there,” Will announced. Mike gritted his teeth as he watched Will open the door for her and the two of them walk out. He knew it was about to be a long night. 

El and Max walked out looking stunning. El had kept her promise. Max did look bitchin’. And so did she. 

“You look gorgeous, El,” Mike said. 

El smiled. “Thanks, Mike.” 

They arrived at school and finally walked into the gymnasium after a long car ride. El found her date, James, and they all regrouped at one of the tables, talking and sipping punch. Lucas and Max had no problem flaunting their dance moves and El had no problem following their lead with her own date. Leslie pulled Will out onto the floor too. 

Mike took a seat by Dustin and sighed. “Is it just me who’s getting déjà vu?” he asked. 

Dustin took another drink of punch. “You not having fun?” 

With a shrug of his shoulders he said, “I- I don’t know. Just bored. That’s why I never liked coming to these things.”

“You seemed to be okay when you and Will would be drinking punch in the corner together all night,” Dustin replied.

Mike looked over at Will and Leslie dancing together in the crowd of teenagers. “Times change I guess.” He took a sip of punch hoping to drown his sorrows in the taste of fruit. It was bittersweet.

When a slow song came on, Mike watched as the couples got together, holding each other's shoulders or waists. His gaze moved over to where Will stood, hands on Leslie’s waist, grip firm. They were standing so close. It made Mike’s stomach churn and he honestly thought he was going to be sick. He quickly excused himself and nearly ran out of the gymnasium heading towards the bathroom. 

Mike locked himself in a stall and sat on the toilet seat attempting to collect himself, blinking back tears. He knew he was being stupid. It’s not like he and Will could actually go to prom or dance together. He let out a slow, shuddering breath as he rocked himself back and forth. He was probably there about 10 minutes before he heard a knock on the door. 

“Mike?” His stomach dropped. It was Will. Of course it was Will. It always was. 

He slowly stood and unlocked the stall door, pushing it open. “Hey…,” Mike said softly, hoping he wouldn’t look like he’d been crying. 

“Is…,” Will started thoughtfully. “Is something wrong?” 

Mike shook his head and leaned against the door frame, looking down. “No. Everything’s fine.”

“Mike.” 

Mike looked back up to meet Will’s gaze. “I’m fine. You should get back to your girlfriend now.”

Will frowned. “My- what?” The nerve he had to pretend he hadn’t just been practically feeling Leslie up was what annoyed Mike. 

He rolled his eyes and pushed past him walking past a few guys and out the bathroom door. Will followed as he walked down the hall.

“Mike, wait. You’ve got it wrong, okay? Leslie and I are just friends, ” Will said, picking up his pace to be next to Mike. The audacity Will had to say that. After Mike had seen him  making literal goo goo eyes at her while they slow danced.  

“Really, Will?” Mike stopped and turned to face him in the middle of the dark hall. “It didn’t look like that.”

“I’m not lying. We are just friends,” Will said matter-of-factly. “And even if we weren’t, why would it matter? Why do you care, Mike? Are you jealous or something?”

Mike scoffed. “I- I’m not jealous. It doesn’t matter to me whether you’re together or not. I just wish you would’ve told me you liked her.” It would’ve been nice if you’d talked to me like you used to, he thought. 

Will stared at him. “I don’t like her.” 

“Okay, that’s not the point,” Mike said.

“Then what is?” 

The point wasn’t even clear to Mike himself. Maybe the point was that Will didn’t talk to him. Maybe the point was that they were drifting apart and Will wasn’t even trying to save them. Perhaps the point was that they were about to graduate and maybe never see each other again and Will had ditched him for a girl. 

“I don’t know, Will. Go enjoy the stupid dance. I’m going home.” Mike turned and walked towards the nearest exit. 

“Mike!” Will called after him. Mike didn’t answer.

Little did he know that’d be the last conversation they had before he moved away. 

—

Mike fidgeted with his hands. “Sure. Whatever. I was jealous. ” He looked up to see the man nodding. “But not like- it wasn’t- I just missed my friend. Okay?”

“Of course. Everyone goes through that. Growing up, drifting away from friends,” the therapist said. 

The words made Mike relax a bit. “Yeah. Exactly.” Being compared to people in general- normal people- relieved him a bit. He didn’t know why he was so insistent on not letting this man see who he really was. Maybe because if he saw the real him, he’d judge Mike for sure. And Mike had that enough in his own head. He didn’t need it from anyone else. 

“So, did you tell him that? That you felt like you were drifting apart?” 

Mike chewed his bottom lip. “No.” When he found the man raising his eyebrows, Mike continued. “I- I tried. We got into an argument at prom. I just- I told him that I wished he’d told me he liked her. Because I wish he would have talked to me like he used to, you know? I ended up just walking home after that conversation. It was the last one we had before I came here.”

“Then you just moved without saying goodbye and you hadn’t talked until last week at that party?” the therapist asked.

“No. We talked one more time.”

—

It was a couple weeks later, after graduation. Mike’s parents had decided they had enough money to pay his college tuition, even though he had never really wanted to go to college. Apparently it wasn’t really his decision to make though, because they had the money and a school in mind. A school in Indiana. Another thing he hadn’t intended to do was stay in Indiana. And the cherry on top was that they also knew what he’d get his degree in; business. 

Mike wanted none of these things, and he made that very clear the first time they brought that up, which was right after prom. However, it didn’t seem like he had much of a choice as it was that or have to fend for himself. So, Mike decided to try the next best thing; agree to the business degree but fight for his school of choice in New York. Eventually, after much persistence and determination from Mike, his parents agreed.

 He rented a small apartment that he could afford using the money from his parents and his own savings. Nancy helped him move in as she was visiting Jonathan anyway. So, by the end of June, Mike was settled in his new home with a decent job. He’d call the party sometimes. Even Max who was in California. But he hadn’t talked to Will and he knew them talking was long overdue by July. 

So, one day, he called the Byers, and when Will picked up his stomach dropped. He’d somehow avoided talking to him for far longer than he’d ever hoped but right then he knew it was time to have that dreaded conversation. 

“Hello?” 

Mike hesitated for way too long, he knew. “I- Will. Hey, it’s, um, Mike.”

Silence pierced the air for a moment. “Oh. Hey. Uh, El’s not here. I’ll tell her you called though.”

“Can- can we talk?” Mike said quickly, before he could talk himself out of it. 

“Um. Sure,” Will said softly.

When it was quiet for a few moments Mike realized he had to start. “I’m really sorry. About prom.”

Will sighed. “It’s fine. I’m sorry too.” Why he apologized when he’d really done nothing wrong was beyond Mike. 

“I- I was just…annoyed I guess. I don’t know. I was being stupid. I thought it was going to be like old times with the party but-”

“Mike, really it’s okay.”

“Okay…” A pause. “I know we aren’t kids anymore. I don’t know what I expected…”

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. We’re not kids anymore.” For some reason, maybe because Will’s voice was so low when saying that, Mike couldn’t picture his facial expression. 

“Anyway, I just wanted to clear the air. Sorry, again.” 

“I know. It’s fine,” Will said quickly. Another pause.

“Right… Well, I’ll talk to you later I guess.”

“Bye, Mike.” 

“Bye, Will.” 

The line went dead. That conversation had done nothing but add more tension and thickness to the air. So much so that it was suffocating Mike. Nothing was fine, and nothing was fixed. 

—

“And then he hung up? That was it?” 

Mike nodded. “Yeah. I still can’t understand it really. Looking back he seemed mad but I don’t know why. Maybe because he wanted my support with his relationship with Leslie or something.”

“Or maybe he was upset that you moved almost a thousand miles away and didn’t even say goodbye.” The man took another drink of coffee. 

After opening his mouth a few times with intent to protest, Mike gave up with a sigh. “I know it was shitty. I didn’t know what to do though. I was still mad about prom and everything. I don’t know, it’s stupid to me now.” 

“Unfortunately, we can’t change the past, Michael. And a lot of things make sense to us in the moment that don’t in the rearview.”

“Yeah.” Mike stared at the floor. 

“So, then, you ran into him at this party?”

“Yeah. I didn’t even know he’d moved here and then suddenly we’re face to face under the strobe lights.” 

“And that’s why it was upsetting? Because things were awkward?” His therapist leaned forward. 

“I guess so. Plus, I really missed him…” 

—

When Mike was invited to a Halloween party by an acquaintance from school, he was sure he wouldn’t attend. However, he realized that staying home and wallowing in self pity on what used to be the greatest night of the year was probably not ideal for his mental health and well being. So, he decided to go even though he didn’t have a costume or anything. (Though he’d never been to a college Halloween party so he wasn’t sure anyone would dress up anyway.) 

He arrived around 10:30 PM, fashionably late. Mike had only been to a handful of parties in his life. So, naturally, he didn’t know exactly what to do. He had a couple friends at school who said they’d be at the party, and he knew Chris, the person who was throwing the party, well enough. But he was starting to get a lot of anxiety just by walking into that place, with music potentially causing permanent damage to his eardrums, and so many people crowded together. 

Mike finally managed to find the kitchen and pour himself a drink. That was when an arm swung around his shoulders. 

“Michael!” Chris exclaimed. 

“Hey, Chris. Uh, it’s just Mike,” he said awkwardly.  

“Right, right. I’m so glad you could make it.” 

Mike pursed his lips and nodded. “Yeah.” He took another gulp of wine and winced as it burned all the way down his throat. 

“Hey, man,” Chris said to another guy approaching. 

“Chris! What’s up? How’ve you been?” the guy said. 

Chris nodded. “Good.” He looked over at Mike and pulled him over. “Johnny, this is my friend Michael- Mike. Mike, this is Johnny.”

“Hey,” Mike said, offering a hand to shake. 

Johnny took his hand and firmly shook. “Nice to meet you.” He grabbed a beer from the counter. 

“So, uh, do you go to Cornell too?” Mike asked, trying his best to engage in some kind of conversation. He took a sip from his plastic cup.

“Ah, no. I’m at Parsons School of Design.” 

“Oh, okay. Are you an artist then?” 

“I wouldn’t want to insult anyone by calling myself that,” Johnny laughed. 

Chris joined them again. “He’s being modest. He’s really good. Even helping out a freshman.” 

Mike nodded. “I’d love to see your work sometime. My friend-” Mike paused for a second wondering if he could even call Will that anymore, then continued by saying, “he was really into that stuff. I have absolutely no artistic abilities, but I enjoy looking at people’s work.” 

Johnny to a swig, swallowed, and said, “Right on. I’d be happy to show you one day.” 

Mike took another drink, emptying the cup. “Um, I’ll be right back,” he said, excusing himself and heading down the hall in hopes of finding a bathroom. Eventually he did find one. While washing his hands he realized how dizzy he was. “Ugh, guess I should slow down on the drinks,” he groaned to himself. 

He walked out of the bathroom and dodged a couple making out against the wall. That’s when he found himself bumping into someone. 

“Sorry,” he managed. 

“Michael?”

Mike looked up to find Oliver from his marketing class. “Oh, hey.”

“Hey, man. I didn’t know you were coming to this.” Oliver patted his shoulder. Mike didn’t know the guy well but he did know that he was a very touchy feely person, always in people’s personal space. In a way, Mike was like that sometimes. With the party especially. Well, they do say that people tend to not like things about other people that remind them of themselves. 

“Yeah, kind of a last minute decision,” Mike said, glancing around for an escape. 

“Well, I’m so glad you’re here. There’s this girl, Kim, and she’s super single and as far as I know you are too. Do you want-”

“Uh, actually I have to…find my friend.” Mike looked around and slowly pushed past Oliver. “Let’s pick this conversation up… never. ” He mumbled the last word. 

“Okay. Don’t be a stranger!” Oliver called after him. Mike rolled his eyes. Maybe one more drink wouldn’t hurt. 

After finding the kitchen again, Mike poured himself another drink and downed it in a few seconds, scrunching his nose at the burning sensation. He glanced to his right to find Johnny still standing there now talking to some guy who had his back turned to Mike. Johnny caught Mike’s eye. 

“Mike! I want to introduce you to my mentee.” Mike stepped closer and the guy turned around. “This is Will Byers.” Mike thinks maybe Johnny was still talking but he was no longer listening when his eyes fell on Will’s familiar face.

 His hair was a little longer and shaggier than it’d been the last time they saw each other. His style hadn’t changed much, evidently, as he was wearing that yellow flannel he liked so much. Mike couldn’t stop himself from just staring. It was weird to have him in the flesh again after over a year of not seeing each other. He thought for a minute maybe it was a hallucination. 

“Hello? Wait. Do you guys know each other?” Johnny’s voice snapped him out of his trance. Mike looked at Johnny then back at Will. 

“Um,” Will said, still not tearing his eyes away. “Yeah. We kinda grew up in the same town.” His voice was the sweetest sound in the whole world and Mike didn’t realize how much he’d actually missed him until he was here and so tangible. 

“No way! What a small world,” Johnny laughed. Mike still didn’t look away, and Will didn’t either. “I bet you have a lot to catch up on. I’ll see you guys later.” With a pat on Will’s shoulder, Johnny walked off leaving Mike and him in their own little world. 

Will broke the staring contest, looking away and clearing his throat. “Do- do you wanna talk? Outside?”

Mike nodded quickly. “Yeah. Yeah, let’s do that.” He followed as Will weaved his way through the maze of bodies to the back door. They took a seat on the porch steps. There were a few other people out there smoking, but this was the most privacy they were going to get. 

Neither of them said anything for a minute or so. Finally, Mike broke the silence. “Why…are you here?”

“Johnny invited me…?” Will said quizzically. 

“No, I mean, why’re you in New York?” Mike elaborated. 

“Oh.” Will looked down at his hands and fidgeted with them. Mike had the urge to reach over and hold his hand to make him stop. He didn’t act on that urge. “I’ve been here for a couple months. I decided to save up last year so I just stayed in Hawkins and found a job there. Then I got a partial scholarship to Parsons and I thought it’d be nice to be near Jonathan. So…yeah.”

Mike frowned in concentration. “Why didn’t you tell me? You knew I lived around here, didn’t you?”

Will sighed. “I don’t know, Mike. I didn’t even have your number.”

“El does,” Mike pointed out.

Will shifted slightly. “Yeah, but I didn’t really think you’d want to hear from me.”

“What?” Mike asked, perplexed. “Why wouldn’t I want to hear from you?”

“I guess ‘cause…you never called? I thought you just moved on and had a better life in New York. And…our last two conversations I guess.”

Mike swallowed back his guilt. “I- I thought you didn’t want to hear from me. You seemed upset the last time we talked. I just thought maybe you needed space.” 

“Yeah, well…it is what it is.” Will met his gaze for a split second before he flicked his eyes back to the ground. 

“I’m…I’m sorry.” Mike knew it wouldn’t fix anything. But it was all he could say. 

Will shrugged. “It’s fine. It’s like you said: we’re not kids anymore. It’s time to grow up.” 

That was the last thing Mike expected Will to say. His Will, the Will he grew up with playing D&D in his basement for hours, would never say that. But this Will just said it. This Will that Mike didn’t even know. The Will that was a complete stranger to him. The Will that stood up and turned to walk away. 

Mike watched. He could feel Will slipping through the cracks in his fingers all over again. Which was stupid because he’d already lost him. He didn’t have any more Will to hold onto. Even so…

“Wait!” He watched as Will paused at the door, glancing back at him. “Can- can I call you? Please.” Will just stared at him, hand on the door knob. This was Mike’s last chance. His last attempt to save what he and Will used to have. If it didn’t work, he’d give up. He’d go home tonight and never try to reach out to Will again. He’d move on. He’d grow up. He’d do his best to forget. Please, his inner voice begged because he didn’t want to forget.

Finally, Will’s hand fell from the knob. “Okay.” 

Mike relaxed a bit. “Great.” 

Will pulled out a gum wrapper from his pocket. “I don’t have a pen.” 

“Shit, okay,” Mike felt around in his coat praying he had something. Thankfully, he did have the blue pen that kind of became his lucky charm. “Here.” He handed the pen to Will and hyper focused on the small brush of their fingers when exchanging it. 

Will scribbled down the digits, folded up the wrapper and handed both the pen and the gum wrapper to Mike. He crossed his arms slowly. “Well, if that’s all…I’m probably gonna call it a night.” 

“Oh, okay. Um, see you later.” 

Will gave a tight nod before turning, opening the door, and walking inside, leaving Mike on the porch squeezing the pen and the gum wrapper in his hand.

—

“It hurt that he’d moved on I guess,” Mike explained. “That’s why I’m upset, if you wanna call it that. I just kind of thought if we met again we could pick things up where we left off or leave our stupid arguements in the past.” 

“‘Stupid’?” the man quoted. “You think the fights were stupid?”

“Yeah. I mean, they weren’t worth losing my best friend of over a decade over.” 

Mike’s therapist nodded. “That makes sense.” He sipped some coffee and continued. “When he mentioned the thing you said about not being kids anymore, were you upset with yourself?”

Mike stared at his feet. “Well, yeah. But he totally misunderstood what I meant. When I said that I was just repeating what everyone kept telling me. Because I was officially an adult at that point. It’s not like anyone wants to grow up, it just happens and we don’t have a say in it. So, when I said that it’s not like I wasn’t devastated by that fact too. It was just the truth.”

“And the truth hurts sometimes, doesn’t it? However, I wonder if maybe that hurt him much more than you can imagine. Just knowing what I know, it sounds like he struggled a lot after going missing. Of course it affected everyone, but especially him. Now, I don’t know what he went through, but a common response to childhood trauma is growing up too fast. Perhaps he was trying to hold onto the bit of innocence he had left.”

Mike processed this. It made sense. That’s why it left a sick feeling in his stomach. 

The therapist continued. “I’m not sure though. It’s just a thought. It sounds like you went through a similar thing. I can’t imagine the panic you went through when he was missing. It affected you too, causing you to grow up too fast. It would make sense that you’re now missing the adolescence you were robbed of.”

This man saw right through Mike. That might’ve scared him if it wasn’t so comforting. Mike didn’t even have to say all that, his therapist just understood. He guessed that’s what a psychology degree did to you. 

“Yeah,” Mike said finally. “I, uh, I guess that does make sense.”

The man bobbed his head up and down silently. “Then, what? Did you call the number?”

“Yeah, I did two days later.”

—

Mike dialed the number a couple days after the party. The gum wrapper had just been lying on his desk and he looked at it so much he probably memorized the digits. But he looked at it anyway, carefully putting in the right ones. Finally, someone picked up. 

“Hello?”

Mike thought for a second maybe he made a mistake when dialing. “Uh, is Will there? I’m a, uh, friend.”

“Oh, okay. I think he has a class right now actually,” the guy on the other line, who Mike assumed was Will’s roommate, said. Shit, Mike thought. “I can let him know you called. What’s your name and number?” 

“Um, it’s Mike and—” 

There was a pause as the guy presumably wrote down the numbers Mike told him. “Alright. I’ll tell him.”

“Thanks. Bye.” Mike hung up and walked over to the couch where he dramatically flopped down and groaned. 

He was just a tad bit anxious to talk to Will again. After that night at the party and seeing Will again, him being so close yet so far, Mike couldn’t believe he ever let him out of his life. He remembered what Will being around was like. And he couldn’t go back to how he’d been living. Without Will, Mike didn’t think he could live. Now it was clear that the reason he’d been so depressed all year was because he didn’t have the one person that’d brought him joy his whole life. 

So, yeah, living without Will was no longer an option. 

A couple days passed but it felt like months or years to Mike because all he could do when he was in his apartment was stare at the phone and try to make it ring. When it did, he got so excited- maybe too excited. 

He answered with a hopeful, “Hello?” only to be greeted by a stupid telemarketer. 

Finally, Mike decided he’d just call back. He’d waited over 48 hours. Will wouldn’t mind, would he? Maybe Will’s roommate just forgot to tell him Mike had called. Or maybe the roommate lost his number. That was always a possibility. Though, he couldn’t picture Will choosing such a disorganized roommate. Still, it was possible. 

Mike dialed the number once again and waited as the phone rang. Please pick up. Please pick up…

Just as he began to lose hope, a voice said, “Hello, William speaking.”

Mike grinned. “Hey, William, it’s Mike.”

“Oh. Mike,” Will said, surprised. 

“I, uh, I called a couple days ago and your roommate answered I think…?” Mike questioned.

“Alan. Yeah, he’s my roommate.” 

“I told him to let you know but I didn’t know if he forgot or…” Mike trailed off.

“He told me.” At Will’s words Mike twirled the phone chord and bit the inside of his cheek. He hoped he didn’t look desperate now or something. But the other thing that bothered him was that Will hadn’t called him back. Mike hadn’t really considered that scenario. The scenario where Will just didn’t feel like talking to him. 

Will continued. “I just got…busy. Sorry. I was going to call.”

Mike cleared his throat. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

A pause. “So…was there a reason you were calling?” 

In all honesty, Mike hadn’t thought this far ahead. He was taking it one step at a time. Dial Will’s number. Hope he’d pick up. Explain why he was calling again. He’d wanted to hear Will’s voice and try to see if there was any possible way he could save their friendship. But the details were a bit fuzzy…

“I, um, not- not exactly… I mean, no, there was- I just…,” Mike stuttered. God, he was really bad at this wasn’t he? He needed help from God himself. Mike caught a glimpse of an advertisement in a magazine that sat on the counter. Tony’s Pizza. “You’ve only been here, like, a couple months, right? You probably haven’t been to Tony’s. It’s a pizza place. Best pizza. Better than Surfer Boy. By far. You haven’t been there yet, have you?”

Please say no, please say no, please say no, please-

“No…,” Will said slowly. 

“Great! I mean, not great that you haven’t been there but great because… Anyway, how about Friday evening? 6:00-ish?” 

“Um,” Will hesitated. Oh God, please tell me he’s free. “I can’t…” Mike never thought two little words could be so devastating. Screw God. Or the universe. Thanks a lot for this. But then Will continued. “...Friday. I have a thing. What about…tomorrow?”

Yes! Mike was officially in. I take it back. Thank you God, thank you universe. “Yeah!” Mike said a little too enthusiastically. He dialed it back 20 notches and cleared his throat. “That- that works for me.” 

“Okay. Cool.” 

“Cool,” Mike agreed.

“See you then?” Will asked. 

“Yeah. See you then.” 

—

It didn’t occur to Mike until he was in the back of a cab on his way to Tony’s Pizza that he had never actually eaten there and it may not be that good. So, again, Mike consulted whatever God or higher power was out there and begged them for one more favor. Please let this pizza taste good.

He paid the cab driver and stepped out. He was starting to regret wearing the converse that just barely fit because he’d been walking around campus all day and his feet were killing him. But they went with the rest of his outfit- black and white t-shirt, black jeans, red checkered flannel- that he’d spent an hour picking out like some middle school girl before a first date. Which was stupid because this was definitely not a date. This was the rekindling of a broken friendship.

When he walked inside he scanned the room only to find no trace of Will. He checked his watch to find he was a few minutes early, and traffic is always bad this time of day, therefore he shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that he was being stood up. He slid into a booth and nervously fidgeted with his hands and checked his watch every minute. 

About 13 minutes passed like that (not that Mike was counting) until finally a bell rang and Will entered the shop. He was wearing a blue, red, yellow and white striped shirt that looked like the same kind of thing he’d worn through middle and high school. Will looked around and Mike stood and waved to him. 

When Will spotted him he walked over. “Hey. I’m just starting to get used to how terrible traffic is here.”

Mike chuckled. “Yeah. It’s a lot different than Indiana traffic.” There was a pause as Mike just stared at Will, trying to remember how he looked in case this was the last time he’d see him. 

He realized too late that that probably made his (former) best friend uncomfortable. Will shifted, let out a breath and looked at the cashier. “Should we, like, order?”

After blinking a few times trying to remind himself where he was and what he was doing, Mike nodded. “Right, yeah.”

Eventually, they took a seat in the booth across from each other, only to awkwardly look around at anything, absolutely anything, but each other. 

“Uh,” Mike started, “how’s school?” Maybe an ice breaker would do the trick. 

“Fine.” 

Okay…maybe not. “Are you…working on anything?”

“Yeah, a couple of pieces. Nothing too interesting. Just studies and stuff,” Will said.

At this point Mike was positive he’d been an idiot to think that he and Will could just pick back up where they left off with no hard feelings and no tension. And it wasn’t like he could blame Will because he’d done absolutely nothing wrong. It was all Mike, as usual. So, Mike had to fix it, no matter how stubborn his (former) best friend was being.

“Is, uh, art school what you thought it’d be? I know you’ve wanted to go for a while…”

Will shrugged. “Yeah, I guess. It’s harder than I thought.”

“How come?” Mike pushed.

“I don’t know. Most of the people there have had more experience than elementary school art class.” Will looked down at his lap where, even though he couldn’t see, Mike knew he was fidgeting with his hands. “They’re a lot better than me.” 

“Bullshit.” Will looked up at the sudden tone and volume change. “Will, you’re like the best artist in the world. So what if some other students have had more classes? You didn’t need them. You’ve got talent . You have the desire to create. I’ve watched you spend hours on pieces, paying attention to every single detail. And you know how to grow and improve all on your own. I’ve seen it. That’s enough experience as far as I can tell.”

Will blinked at him, most likely not expecting the amount of passion Mike just gave him about this subject. His cheeks pinkened in the low light of the pizza shop and he glanced down, a soft smile playing on his lips. “Thanks, Mike.”

Mike shook his head and frowned. “Don’t thank me. It’s just the truth. And now that you are in classes you’re going to improve, like, 10 times faster. So, I wouldn’t worry about other students being ‘better’” -he made sure to include the air quotes- “because as far as I’m concerned you’re going to pass them by a long shot because you have more passion about art than anyone I’ve ever met.” 

Again, Will just stared at him studying his face, eyes flicking from one of Mike’s eyes to the other, with his pink lips slightly parted. “Thank- I mean- Okay,” Will said, smiling again. 

Mike returned the look because Will’s smiles were contagious. 

Suddenly, two slices of pizza were placed in front of them and Mike actually flinched because he forgot it wasn’t just him and Will alone in their own little world. 

Will looked down, examining his slice. “Okay…” Looking at his own, Mike realized that his prayer from earlier might’ve not been heard, and he almost stopped Will when he went to take a bite. Mike watched as Will chewed, eyebrows knit in concentration. “Better than Surfer

Boy Pizza, ” he said when he swallowed. “But not by much.”

“What?” Mike frowned at his piece or pepperoni pizza that stared up at him. “Really?” Mike picked it up, took a bite, and chewed. 

Will laughed at the look of disgust that Mike made as he swallowed. “Didn’t you say this was, and I quote, the ‘best pizza’?” 

“In my defense I’d never tried it! In fact, I hadn’t heard of this place until I saw an ad for it during our phone call yesterday!” Mike exclaimed.

Will let out a fake gasp. “You mean you lied to me, Michael? ” 

“Not intentionally!” 

Will shook his head, a grin stretching across his face. “I can’t believe I fell for this. All so you could get some time alone with me, huh?” 

Now Mike was the one blushing. “I-” 

One of Will’s signature lighthearted laughs sounded as he stood. “C’mon. Let’s get out of here and find something edible.” 

Mike grinned. “Alright.”

—

A burger and fries never tasted so scrumptious in Mike’s entire life. He appreciated it so much more after trying the greasy, cardboard-y mess that was Tony’s Pizza. Will seemed to agree as there was complete silence between them as they scarfed down their food. 

After they finished they walked to the subway. Will seemed a little quiet the whole way, but Mike didn’t pry or anything. If he didn’t know Will it might’ve been more worry provoking, but Mike knew he wasn’t too talkative a lot of the time. 

They stepped on the train and held the poles as it began moving. Mike checked his watch to find it was almost 9:00 PM. It was weird how he and Will could spend a few hours together and it only felt like a few minutes. That was when Mike noticed what day it was: November sixth. And that was when Mike’s eyes flitted to Will who was staring at the ground lost in thought. Maybe Mike should’ve been more worried. He didn’t even remember that this was the anniversary of the night he went missing seven years ago. 

Shit. That’s why he’s been like this. 

When Will went to exit the train after giving Mike a small smile and wave goodbye, Mike hesitated before ultimately deciding to follow him off. “Wait, Will!” Will turned at the sound of Mike’s voice. 

He frowned. “Isn’t your stop next? You should get on before the train leaves-”

Mike shook his head. “Yeah. But, um, I just… Can I walk you to your apartment?” 

Will opened his mouth like he was going to protest but then clamped it shut. “Sure.”

Mike trailed a little behind Will as he followed him through the streets of Manhattan. He played out what he’d say to Will in his head. Hey, Will. I know it’s the anniversary of the start of all that shit and stuff and I know that affects you. I just wanted you to know I’m here if you want to talk because I get it. Wait, no. I’m here. Talk to me. Is that too demanding? I don’t entirely get it, but I kind of do, a little, and-

Somehow Mike had completely dissociated into his own head and had one minute been on the streets and was now hovering outside Will’s front door. 

“Um, thanks, Mike. For everything,” Will said softly, holding the doorknob to his cracked front door. For a while there, Mike thought they’d made progress. They were joking and laughing and talking like they used to. But now Mike knew he was shutting down and if he didn’t say something they might’ve just taken one step forward and three steps back. “Well, bye-”

“Wait, Will,” Mike cut him off. “I just, um. I know…what day it is.”

Will was silent for a moment, gazing down at the ground. When he finally did speak his voice was lower. “What about it?”

“I want you to know that, um, I’m here, okay? And I get it-”

“No one gets it, Mike,” Will said slowly, demeanor shifting. 

“I- I know. Sorry. That was a bad choice of words.” Mike took a deep breath. “I just mean I know what it’s like to an extent. You know? The memories and stuff…”

Will nodded. “Yeah, I know.”

“So, just let me know if you need anything. Please?” Please. He wanted to help Will, but how could he help someone who wouldn’t reach out and ask for it?

“Okay,” Will murmured. 

But Mike wasn’t sure he got it. “I’m just a phone call away. Seriously. If you need anything at all-”

“I said okay, Mike. I get it,” Will said with a slight edge to his tone. 

Mike bit the inside of his cheek. “Right…sorry. Um, goodnight.” Mike turned. 

Right as he reached the stairs, Will called out. “Mike!” Mike turned. Will hesitated before he finally spoke again. “Thank you.” 

Mike gave him a small, sad smile. “Of course.” 

—

“I’m not sure I understand, Michael,” the therapist said, frowning. 

“Um, what exactly is there to not understand?” Mike asked, genuinely confused. 

“Why’re you upset with him? Did I miss something?” 

Ah. So, here’s where lying becomes a little messy. You have to stick to your story. You have to remember every little detail about the truth that you twisted and not leave any plot holes. Now, Mike was a writer, luckily, so he didn’t have too much trouble with plot holes because he was constantly filling them in every time he saw one. However, this was real life and he hadn’t actually taken the time to write out his lie- or “twist of the truth”- that he’d tell his therapist. 

His therapist continued. “I mean, it sounds like you’re already starting to fix things after just two meetings. I’d call that progress. And it sounds to me like he wants to fix things as well.”

So, Mike had just conveniently left out the piece where he was in love with Will. And the piece where he barely slept last night because he was worrying about Will. And the piece where he was obsessively staring at the phone as if he had powers like El and could magically make Will call him. And the piece that he wanted to protect Will more than anyone else he knew because he was the most precious being in the entire universe to him. 

But those were just minor things that this stranger (yes, he was still a stranger even after almost six months of meeting with him because if Mike couldn’t remember his name then he was basically just an acquaintance that he [partially] opened up to for some reason) didn’t need to know. Mike had full confidence in himself that he could play it off. 

“Well…,” he started. “I mean, I’m not upset with him. I’m just upset. There’s a difference.” The therapist stared at him waiting for him to unwrap that. “Um, I mean, I wish he’d let me in a little more, you know? I wish I could help him…”

“Not to be rude, but that’s not really your job, is it? In all honesty, Will’s got to deal with that by himself. If he doesn’t want to reach out to you for support, that’s his decision,” the man said matter-of-factly. “And it’s not your job to carry that burden.”

“Yeah- yeah, I know. People always say that. But it’s not like Will’s a burden. And, with all due respect, I disagree that that’s not my job. As a friend, I think it is. I want to check in on him. Yeah, obviously Will needs more help than I can give him, but everyone needs friends to talk and open up to.”

“Of course, I didn’t mean-”

Mike cut him off. “And yeah, therapists are kinda like ‘paid friends’ that have a psychology degree and more wisdom than anyone else you talk to, but friends friends are real, genuine people who want to stick by your side through the good and the bad. No offense. I’m not saying therapists aren’t genuine and don’t want to help people. I’m just saying that therapists are paid to help you. Friends aren’t. Friends make that decision all on their own.” 

He didn’t realize how much he’d rambled until he was trying to catch his breath as silence rang through the office. 

“I…I agree, Michael. That’s some great insight you’ve got.” Mike nodded in response. “Unfortunately, we are out of time.”

Mike glanced at the clock wondering how an hour just went by. “Oh. Right.”

“So, I’ll see you next week?”

Mike stood. “Yeah. Next week.”

—

It’d been a week since Mike and Will’s dinner and since the last time they talked. Mike knew Will said he’d reach out if he needed something, but, if he were being totally honest with himself, he didn’t think Will would. He had trouble asking for help, always had. Mike knew that. So, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to check up on him. 

He called three times that day only for the phone to ring and ring with no avail. He finished all his classes by 3:00 PM, which left him with nothing to do but anxiously pace his apartment and stare at the phone, once again wishing he were El and could make it ring. Not that El could control Will and force him to be open with his feelings though. 

Around 4:00 PM Mike had had enough. The seconds felt like minutes, the minutes felt like hours, the hours felt like days. He couldn’t just sit around and wait for a boy who was virtually incapable of expressing his pain and struggles without prompting to reach out for help because that was due to happen on the 32nd of Neveraury. 

So, Mike grabbed his coat and hat and took the subway to where they’d gotten off last week. Then Mike realized that New York looks completely different in the daytime and he’d also spaced out most of the time when walking to and from Will’s apartment, so perhaps this plan wasn’t foolproof. But Mike would not give up because, if nothing else, he was persistent. Honestly, persistent was a nice word for it because he was just downright stubborn. 

Somehow, while the sun was just a bit above the horizon line, Mike saw the complex that just had to be Will’s. He knew it when he saw it. Of course, he’d only been there once but he could remember bits and pieces of it. He made his way to the third floor which he distinctly remembered Will lived on. Now…what was the number? 

He walked down the hall and eventually came across a door he thought was slightly familiar (although how would he know they all looked the same) with the number 705 in gray next to it. I think this is it. Mike raised his fist to knock and got cold feet all of the sudden when realizing that he may look like a stalker by doing this…

But Will was more important than Mike’s dignity right now, so, before he could change his mind, he knocked. 

He didn’t hear anything at first. Perhaps no one was home? Or maybe they just didn’t hear him. Either way, it wouldn’t hurt to knock again. So, Mike did just that, a little harder this time. 

Mike paused and listened for any sound from inside the house. He waited as the seconds ticked away. 10…20…30… Finally, there were footsteps and the sound of the door being unlocked. It slowly cracked open and Will’s tired face and unkempt hair appeared. 

“Oh. Mike,” he said. 

“Hey…,” Mike said, slow and soft. “I just came…to check on you.” 

Will bit his lip. “Um. Do- do you want to come in?”

“Sure, if you don’t mind.”

Will opened the door wider revealing that he was wearing a white stained t-shirt and checkered pajama pants. Pajamas at 5:00 PM? Mike walked inside and slid off his shoes in the entryway. The place was a mess. Dirty dishes piled high in the sink, paperwork scattered across the counters and the dining table. Random household items strewn about. Laundry on the couch. 

Mike didn’t know if it always looked like this, but, judging by how Will always had the neatest space out of anyone in the party, he was willing to go out on a limb and say it didn’t. 

Yeah, Mike thought, he’s not doing well.

“Sorry for the mess,” Will apologized, walking into the kitchen. “Alan’s gone for the week and I wasn’t expecting anyone…” 

“That’s okay,” Mike said, standing by the counter as Will opened the fridge. 

“Do you want something to drink? Water or…” He scanned the almost completely bare shelves. “...water,” he mumbled. 

“Um- water’s great. Thanks.” Will grabbed a glass from the sink and scrubbed it with a sponge. Meanwhile, a stack of mail caught Mike’s eye. Bills mainly. 

“Here,” Will said, handing him the glass of water and hurriedly removing the stack of mail from the counter top, carrying it over to the bookshelf. 

Mike sipped at the water as Will rushed to clear papers from in front of two seats at the dining table. He muttered a couple more apologies as Mike took a seat, placing his water in front of him. 

Finally, after shoving the papers as much out of the way as possible, Will took a seat too. 

Silence. 

“Will…,” Mike started. 

“I know what you’re going to say. Believe me, Mike, I already know. I’m a mess, right?” He let out a weak, half-hearted laugh. 

Mike felt so much sympathy for him at that moment. His heart was breaking. “No, Will. You’re not a mess, okay? I just… I thought you said you’d call me if you needed anything.” 

“I was…managing.” Even Will didn’t sound convinced by his words. 

“Will…”

“Mike, it’s not a big deal. I’ve dealt with this before. I’m okay. ” 

“This, Will,” Mike gestured around, spreading his arms out, “this does not say ‘ okay.’”

Will opened his mouth in protest only to shut it again and look down at his fidgeting fingers defeated. “I know…”

“And before you take that the wrong way and get lost in that little head of yours,” Mike poked Will’s forehead earning his gaze shifting to himself, “I don’t mean you’re a mess. I just mean that the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, Will. Which you do, because this is not normal.” 

Will opened his mouth to speak but Mike continued. “And before you take that the wrong way too, I don’t mean you aren’t normal, I mean living like this isn’t normal for people who are genuinely okay. ”

That seemed to do the trick because Will clamped his mouth shut and slowly nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” 

“Of course I am.” Sometimes Mike underestimated his life coaching abilities. He guessed six months of therapy helped with improving that hidden talent of his. 

Will was quiet for a few minutes and Mike let him have those minutes to himself, trying not to remind him of his presence. 

“I’m sorry,” Will said tearfully, voice breaking along with Mike’s heart. “I’m sorry.” He wiped at his eyes and Mike stood and hugged him in one swift motion. 

“Will, don’t be sorry. It’s okay.”

“N- no. It’s not. I should be fine. I’ve gone to therapy. It’s been years. And yet…” He let out a quiet sob into Mike’s shoulder and Mike rubbed circles on his back. 

“Hey, hey…it’s okay. You’re not alone. You hear me? You’re not alone. ” Will choked on another sob. “This kind of stuff… stays with you. It sucks, I know. It’s not like it just goes away. I hate to say it…but time doesn’t really heal. You know what does?”

He waited till Will gave him a small questioning hum.

“Talking about it. Reaching out. Acknowledging it because then it doesn’t fester or seem as big and formidable.”

Will took a deep breath, slowly pulled away, and Mike followed suit. “T- thanks. For everything.” 

“Don’t thank me.” Will nodded and wiped his eyes. “You know what we’re going to do?”

“What…?” Will asked. 

“Well…first of all,” Mike sniffed and scrunched his nose, “you’re gonna shower.”

Will let out a wet laugh. “Fair enough.”

Mike glanced at the kitchen and the sink of dirty plates and pans. “And I’ll get started on that pile of dishes that is just… calling my name.” He grinned when he saw the small smile growing on Will’s face. “How ‘bout it?”

Will took a deep breath and stood. “Alright.” 

—

The man peered at Mike over the top of his glasses. “I’m glad you were there for him, I really am, Michael. I’m just wondering about you.”

Mike frowned. “What about me?”

“How are you feeling about all of this? I highly doubt the Anniversary Effect is only affecting Will,” he stated plainly. 

“I’m fine.” Mike’s therapist’s expression said bullshit. So, he went on. “I mean, yeah, I still get nervous at certain stuff. And I get this sinking feeling now and then… But it always happens around this time of year. I’m coping with it.”

“How?” the man prompted. 

“What?”

“How’re you coping?” Mike opened his mouth but no words came out. “By ignoring it? Acting like everything’s normal? Or could it be by…losing yourself in your writing?” 

“I-”

“I could be wrong, tell me if I am, but perhaps you aren’t taking your own advice. Don’t you think you, yourself, should open up and talk about it? I’m not saying to myself, but I am here if you want to.”

Mike hesitated and thought through his next words. “You…make a good point I guess,” he chuckled. “I don’t know. I guess I just don’t feel like I have the right to be upset. It’s not like I was taken- missing. It’s not like I was having episodes constantly the year after.”

“Yes,” the man agreed, nodding his head, “but you witnessed it.”

“Well, yeah, but I didn’t live it,” Mike protested. 

“I think you did.” When he saw the confusion on Mike’s face he explained. “Michael, you can’t compare trauma. Trauma is just trauma. Everyone’s experience with it is unique. Although you may not have first handedly experienced being missing and having episodes, it still affected you. No kid should have to fear that his best friend may not be alive. No kid should have to watch anyone have those episodes you’ve mentioned; the screaming, the crying.”

Mike looked down at the carpet his feet were planted in. “Yeah,” he said tightly. Six months of therapy and he’d still not gotten used to having his feelings validated. 

The more he thought about those times the sicker he felt. He didn’t think he’d ever been as heartbroken as he’d been when he lost Will that night in 1983. He didn’t think he’d ever been as petrified as when Will was screaming, burning from the inside out. He wanted to make it stop. He wanted to hold Will and never let him go. And take away all his pain. 

“I imagine seeing Will hurting like this has taken a toll on you too. Not only is it upsetting to watch anyone suffer the repercussions of trauma, it’s disturbing because you’re reminded of those first major episodes he had, and how they affected you. And you may even feel like that little boy again. That helpless boy who couldn’t save his best friend from his pain.” The therapist paused and Mike’s gaze stayed locked on the floor. “Does any of that sound right?”

Mike swallowed the lump in his throat. Only every bit of it, he thought. Maybe this man had abilities like El’s after all because he was definitely reading Mike’s mind. Or maybe he was just that transparent. “Yeah…it does.”

The man hummed. “So, did anything else happen yesterday?”

Mike bit his lip. “Uh, not really…” 

—

Saying you’re going to tidy Will’s apartment and actually doing it were two completely different things Mike found. However, Mike cared about (loved) Will too much to let him live like this and he knew helping him clean up his place was the best way to show that regard. So, he cleaned and even though he’d never been that clean in his life, he found he did a decent job.

They sorted through Will’s homework and textbooks that were scattered across the table and the counters. Mike did a load of laundry and folded the already cleaned clothes. They cleaned the bathroom and wiped down the kitchen counters. By the time they were done the place shined like no one even lived there. They both collapsed on the couch. 

“Ugh, finally. I can’t believe how long that took,” Will groaned. 

“I can’t believe that you’ve been living in your own filth for a week,” Mike said. 

Will swatted at him and he cowered behind his hands, laughing. “Shut up.”

“I’m kidding!”

“I know,” Will chuckled. “But it’s the truth.” He looked down at his lap.

“Hey, I’m really proud of you,” Mike said in a softer tone, placing a hand on Will’s shoulder. 

Will didn’t look up as he snorted and said, “For what? Neglecting my personal hygiene for a week?”

Mike frowned. “First of all, we’ve all done it at one point or another. Secondly, no. I’m proud of you for talking to me and at least putting effort into trying to feel a bit better.”

Their eyes met when Will finally tore his gaze away from his sweatpants. “I mean, you didn’t give me much of a choice, did you?” A hint of a smile crept into Will’s expression. 

Mike smiled back because when Will smiled, he did. It was just how it worked. “You’re giving me too much credit. You have free will. It’s not like I forced you to do anything.”

Will’s smile became a full on smirk. “Hmm… I beg to differ, Michael. ” 

Honestly, Will calling him by his full name affected him more than he was willing to admit. He found it endearing when Will teased him. Especially now that it’d been so long since they’d actually hung out and it proved he was becoming more comfortable around Mike again. 

“What was that, William?” Mike shot back, eyebrows raised. “If I remember correctly you bathed yourself.” They both broke into a fit of laughter. It was like they were kids again. If Mike tried hard enough, he could imagine them sitting not on the couch in Will’s apartment, but on the couch in the basement of his childhood home. Maybe they were in the middle planning a campaign or playing video games. 

“Want to watch a movie?” Will asked. “If you don’t have to leave, that is.”

Mike checked his watch even though he knew he had nowhere to be and he knew he’d agree no matter how late it was. It was only about 8:30 PM. “Nah. I’m good. What movie?”

“Hold on, let me see what I have.” Will stood and Mike immediately missed his presence; warmth radiating off of him from a few inches away. He watched as Will grabbed a few VHS tapes from the shelf. Will turned and headed back towards the couch. “Okay. I don’t have a great selection but we have a few options. The Goonies, Stand by Me, or The Karate Kid. ” 

Mike hummed in thought. “ Stand by Me. ”

Will rolled his eyes. “I knew you were going to say that.” 

“Then why’d you ask?” 

Will walked towards the TV and shrugged. “I had to make sure you were the same Mike Wheeler I grew up with.” 

Mike laughed. “Are you kidding? I haven’t changed a bit.”

“Eh. That’s not entirely true,” Will said, fidgeting with the VHS player. 

“What?” Their eyes finally met as Will turned. 

“We’ve both changed, Mike. Neither of us are the same as when we were kids.” Mike opened his mouth to protest but, dumbly, couldn’t find any words. Will turned back to the player and Mike frowned to himself. Something about those words didn’t sit right with him. 

—

“Then he just said that we changed and we weren’t the same anymore or something,” Mike explained. “I guess he wasn’t wrong. It just didn’t feel right.”

“Of course it didn’t. Nothing about change feels right. It’s a natural human instinct to be uncomfortable when change occurs,” his therapist said before taking a drink of coffee. 

“Yeah,” Mike frowned at the ground. “There was just like…more meaning to those words though. I don’t know. Something unspoken that just made me almost…nauseous.”

The man nodded. “Tension maybe?”

“I don’t know. I guess.” 

“Probably because you haven’t addressed the elephant in the room. I don’t know everything but it sounds like you two have a lot to talk about. Maybe you have things you need to say to him.”

Mike tensed. If he let this man see any more into his brain he just knew he’d drop dead then and there. This man was inching closer to opening that door in Mike’s mind that Mike barely allowed himself to open. He hadn’t even consciously acknowledged its existence until a few years ago. No one knew what was beyond that door. No one but Mike. And he’d rather die than let anyone in there. Because he was ashamed of what was inside. 

Inside were the things he couldn’t tell anyone, not even Will. Especially not Will. Secrets that rotted him from the inside out. Insecurities that festered and grew. Things that would repulse anyone and everyone. But even after years of hiding that door and locking it up tightly, it didn’t disappear. It was still there behind the vines growing up and around it. And here Mike’s therapist was trying to chop through those vines and break the door open and pull everything Mike had been so intentional about hiding out into the open. 

It was like being stripped naked. It was humiliating. 

So, Mike stood in front of the door and pointed to something else. “Will’s dating someone,” Mike blurted before he actually made a decision to say it, surprising both himself and his therapist. 

“Oh?” his therapist asked. 

“Yeah.”

“Okay.” The man went along with this as if it weren’t an obvious excuse to quickly change the subject. “Who is she?”

“Um. I don’t know.”

“Did he tell you he’s seeing someone?”

Mike fidgeted with his hands in his lap. “Not exactly…”

—

By the time they finished the movie, it was almost 10:00 PM and Mike was so comfortable he almost didn’t want to get up and leave. Will turned off the TV and turned to Mike who slowly sat up and stretched his arms. 

“Guess I should go,” Mike said, yawning.

“You can stay if you want. On the couch. I’ve got a comforter in the closet.” When Mike hesitated, Will quickly added, “Unless you have class in the morning.”

Mike shook his head. “No, I don’t have class till like 11.”

Will nodded. “Okay. I’ll grab those blankets then.” 

They set up a bed for him on the couch and Will lended him some pajama pants. Mike

could almost pretend like they were kids again having a sleepover. Collapsing back onto the couch, he glanced up at Will. 

“Um, goodnight, Mike,” he said. 

Mike nodded. “‘Night.” He watched as Will headed back to his room, closing the door behind him. He sighed. Okay, so not really a sleepover. He guessed it would’ve been weird if it were anyway. They were adults now. He closed his eyes and let sleep take him away.

As Mike slowly blinked open his tired eyes when he heard a low voice coming from the kitchen. It was still dark. He partially sat up and saw Will holding the phone in the kitchen.  

“Yeah, I know but…” he murmured into the receiver. “I’m handling it…yeah…”

Mike tapped his watch and squinted at the numbers. 12:22 AM. Why Will was up and on the phone at midnight was beyond Mike. Part of him wanted to just get up and ask him. The other part wanted to go back to sleep. He rolled over onto his side and listened. 

“...that’s good…” Will was saying. “I miss you too…yeah, I know…”

I miss you too. I miss you too. I miss you-

I miss you too? That could mean a lot of things, Mike knew that. But for some reason it really jumped out at him. 

Will suppressed a laugh and it came out breathy. “Yeah, I was going to tell you…I finished it.” Finished what? Mike thought. “I’m just waiting on the paint to dry.” Mike’s eyeballs nearly popped out of his head. What?! “Yeah…I hope it’s alright…okay…I’ll call you later…thank you… okay, bye.” Will hung up the phone and quietly crept back down the hall to his room, shutting the door carefully, leaving Mike no longer tired.

—

“So, I was thinking and, like, why would Will call anyone at midnight? He’d only do that to someone he could really count on…” Someone he could count on more than me. “Someone he knows really well. And then he said he missed this person and I found it weird because Will doesn’t just say that to anyone.”

The man nodded slowly, frowning. “Okay…”

“But the main thing is that he’s made a painting for this person. Which is exactly what happened in freshman year of high school when he lived in California for a while. El- his sister- told me! He’d been painting this girl something…I don’t know what, I didn’t hear about it again… But the point is he wouldn’t give just anyone art!” 

That was one of the ways Mike knew he meant something to Will; the art he’d given him over time that he still had. Mike knew Will used to care for him a lot. (Maybe he still did, but it was hard to say.) Just not as much or in the same way as Mike did for him. Will gave some art to El, Jonathan, and his mom occasionally, but besides himself and those people, there weren’t many others he could name. Just that mystery girl in Lenora he’d painted something for. 

“Didn’t you mention that he’d been receiving commissions to earn some extra money?”

“Yes, but why’d he be so friendly with his client? And call them at 12:00 AM?!”

“Maybe they’re in a different time zone.”

Mike shook his head. “He said he missed them. And I’m his best friend. Well, former best friend… But the point is, I know him. And I also know that he’s most definitely dating someone.”

The therapist raised his eyebrows. “ ‘Most definitely,’ huh?” Mike nodded firmly. “I’m sorry, but how does this affect you?”

Okay, so maybe this topic wasn’t much better than the topic of that door in Mike’s brain. He had to find some way to make this point back to Will. He hesitated. “I- It doesn’t. I’m just, like…nosy. Curious.” He paused then continued upon receiving a disbelieving look. “It has nothing to do with me. I just want to know what’s going on with him… And, uh, I don’t know, maybe meet this person. Because they exist. I know it.”

“Right…” Mike’s therapist took another sip of coffee. 

Mike couldn’t tell his therapist the real reason this was bothering him so much. He couldn’t tell him that he was upset over the idea of Will having a girlfriend. It had nothing to do with him, yes, but it felt weird. It felt different. He couldn’t tell his therapist that Will getting a girlfriend actually hurt a lot because, for one, it meant Will wasn’t the same kid he grew up with. And that’s why he’d rushed out of there that morning with only a brief exchange with Will. 

It also meant that Will was no longer his , not that he ever was in the first place. Will was his own person. He didn’t belong to anyone. But for the longest time it felt like Will did. From that day in kindergarten they'd met all the way up until around the summer before high school. And Will wasn’t just his, he was Will’s. They were companions. They were inseparable. They belonged to each other. 

Mike knew Will having a girlfriend meant letting that go for good. Because romantic partners are a lot more important than best friends. Best friends are just moral support. Romantic partners are your other half and the only person in the world who gets every part of you. Perhaps that was part of the reason it’d been so hard for him when Will went to the dance with Leslie back then. Because Mike knew that once Will entered the world of dating, it was over for him. He’d never have Will so close again. 

That was why Mike backed off after prom. Will had found someone and Mike didn’t want to get in the way. Plus, he was pretty depressed about it all and he thought maybe he could just go to New York and forget all about the concept of love and feelings. But here he was 18 months later still head over heels for the only person he’d ever really loved. The person I’ve already lost. 

—

That night seemed to be a turning point for Will. He progressively got better from then on. Mike knew it from the way Will started going back to school, which he learned from Alan when he called one day. He knew it from the way Will looked a bit more relaxed than he had when they met again at that Halloween party. He knew it from the way the soft smile played on Will’s lips when he thought Mike wasn’t watching. 

He could tell Will was doing better as the weeks passed and they moved further away from the anniversary of his disappearance. And it was the biggest relief for him as well. He always felt like he was holding his breath all Fall. But now he could exhale and let his guard down a bit. Will seemed to feel the same way. 

They hadn’t hung out a ton, but during the times they were together Mike felt they were getting back into their rhythm. Or as close to their rhythm as they’d get. Of course Will still was a bit distant and he never reached out to Mike first. However, he and Will being able to talk again was enough for him. 

It was the week before Christmas and Mike braced himself as he walked out of the store into the snow. It felt like it was -100 degrees and Mike speed walked to the subway station in an attempt to get out of the cold sooner. When he finally stepped into his apartment and shut the door he was sure he’d need a sauna to thaw him. He shrugged off his coat and walked into the kitchen to fix himself a cup of cocoa. Just as he did, the phone rang. He assumed it was a telemarketer because not many people actually called him. 

Mike walked over and picked it up. “Hello?” 

“Mike,” Will’s voice was quiet and low. “It’s Will.” He didn’t have to say it though because Mike knew his voice that well. 

“Will. Hey, what’s up?” He shifted and switched the phone to his other ear.

There was a brief pause. “Um… Can- can you come over?” 

It suddenly clicked for Mike that a) this was the first time Will had called him first since they started talking again and b) Will’s voice sounded raspy like he’d been crying. That was enough to make him panic a little. “Yeah. Yeah, of course.” He paused. “You mean right now?”

“Yeah…”

“Okay. Um.” Mike glanced at the stove where he was making cocoa. “I’m on my way.”

“Okay,” Will said, his voice just above a whisper. 

“See you soon,” Mike said.

“Bye.”

Mike put the phone down and rushed to the stove to turn it off. He slipped on his shoes, pulled his coat and hat back on and practically ran out the door, almost forgetting to lock it. 

Apparently when Mike had a clear objective, and he didn’t stop to catch his breath, he could get through the streets of Manhattan in a world record amount of time. When he got to Will’s apartment, he knocked on the door. A few moments passed before he heard footsteps and the door swung open. Will shut it behind Mike as he entered the hallway and shivered. 

“Holy shit, it’s freezing out there,” he said, turning to Will. 

Will’s mouth twitched. “Sorry.”

Nothing initially stood out to Mike. Will looked fairly normal; still in his clothes from the day, hair fixed and neat. But the thing that made it obvious to Mike that this was deceiving was the look in his eyes. They didn’t look like Will’s normal hazel, brightly lit eyes. They looked dull and dark. Like someone had stolen the light from them. 

Mike slowly slipped off his shoes and coat. “Don’t be sorry.”

Will bit his lip. “Right. Sorry-”

“No. Stop it.” Will shut his mouth then. Mike hung his coat up and followed Will into the kitchen. 

“Do you want some cocoa? I already made some.”

Mike nodded. “Yeah, sure.” 

Will poured them each a cup of cocoa and placed them on the dining table. Mike took a sip. It was good and warmed him up, but he wasn’t here for a tea party. 

So, he broke the silence. “Will…did something happen?”
Will didn’t let his eyes leave his mug and hesitated before he spoke. “No… Not really…”

“Why’d you call me?” Mike asked; asking the question that’d been eating him up since he picked up the phone and heard Will’s voice. 

“I didn’t have anyone else to call…I guess…” He exhaled shakily. “I- I tried Jonathan, but he didn’t pick up. He’s always busy nowadays.”

“Why did you call, Will? ” Will finally looked up and met his gaze. 

“I- I don’t know… B- because you’re the only one who understands…” He looked back down at his mug. “I have friends… It’s just they- they don’t get it. How could they? They weren’t there.” He paused. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have called.”

“No,” Mike put his hand over Will’s, which rested on the table. “Will, I’m glad you called.”

Will shook his head. “I- I just- I’m a burden. ” 

Mike frowned. “No, you are not. Don’t ever say that.” 

“But- I moved out here to, I don’t know, be more independent. Obviously, Jonathan’s here if I need anything. But he’s got work and school. I’m supposed to be an adult. I’m not supposed to be dragging you down.”

“You’re not, Will. I promise. I want to be here, okay?”

Will swallowed and slowly nodded, eyeing their hands. Mike thought maybe he should let go, but every bone in his body resisted and he kept his grip firm. 

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t,” Mike continued. 

They made eye contact and Mike wanted to hold Will and reassure him until he understood and kiss him until he felt better. Times like these were what worried Mike the most, because he felt such overwhelming love for Will and that was terrifying. It was terrifying because he was afraid at some point it’d be too much and he’d do something stupid. It was terrifying because no one could know. Especially not Will. 

But the more he kept it in, the more he felt like he was going to burst. 

“Thank you,” Will said, a watery smile on his face. 

Mike squeezed his hand. “Of course.” 

—

Mike arrived at therapy on Friday feeling like he was going to throw up. He sat on the couch, bouncing his leg up and down, and fidgeting with his hands in his lap. 

“So, what happened?” his therapist asked. 

Mike stiffened. “Wh-what?”

“You seem…anxious.” 

By some miracle, he didn’t spill his guts on the carpet right then and there. “Nothing happened. I- I just…didn’t sleep well last night.” That wasn’t even a lie. He hadn’t. Or the night before. Or the night before that. Not since Tuesday.

“Hm…,” the man hummed. “Is something on your mind?”

Mike swallowed. “No.” That was a lie. “I’m just…exhausted.” He was exhausted, so that was partially true. 

“Nothing keeping you awake? Just can’t sleep?”

“Yes,” Mike said impatiently.

The man nodded. “Okay.” Mike thought- hoped- that would be the end of it. “Did you see Will this week?”

At the sound of Will’s name, Mike felt his stomach lurch. His leg bounced faster and he squeezed a fist full of his jeans. “Can- can we please talk about something else?”

Mike’s therapist gave him a suspicious look. “Okay. What would you like to talk about?”

Mike bit the inside of his cheek. “Basically anything else.” It was honestly funny how fast things could change. Just a week ago, he’d been happy to talk about how hanging out with Will was the best part of his week. But now anything was better than talking about Will. Anything.

—

That day that Will called him, Mike stayed over at Will’s place a little longer; watching him paint and ordering them a pizza. Everything was okay. Will seemed happier. Mike knew he, himself, was happier. Hanging out with Will was so comfortable and freeing. He wasn’t sure how he’d even made it all those months in New York without him. 

Every time he saw Will stick the tip of his tongue out in concentration while narrowing his eyes at the piece he was working on, every time he saw him smile, Mike thought that he’d never let him go again. He just hoped Will wouldn’t let him go either. 

Two days later Mike found himself back in Will’s apartment while his roommate was out. They had The Karate Kid playing as background noise while Will drew in his sketchbook and Mike watched. He was sketching a face. Mike couldn’t tell who it was. It might’ve not been anyone. Just a generic-looking face. But Mike was mesmerized anyway. Maybe it was just a little sketch, but it amazed him how Will could just draw something from his mind like that without much effort. 

“How do you do that?” Mike asked when he finished. 

Will looked up at him. “Do what?”

“Just,” Mike acted like he was scribbling on the air, “whip up a masterpiece that quick.” Will laughed out loud. “I’m not kidding!” 

“You act like it’s not just a doodle.” 

Mike widened his eyes. “ That’s a doodle? What’re my doodles then? Scribbles?”

Will let out another laugh. “Okay, fine. It’s a sketch. Still, nothing too interesting.”

“‘Nothing too interesting’? You’re being way too humble right now.” 

Will chuckled. “Well, being around professional artists all day humbles you a little, I guess.” 

“ You’re a professional artist,” Mike pointed out. “Isn’t the definition of a professional that you make money for what you’re doing? You get paid to do commissions.” 

“I mean being around more skilled professional artists,” Will clarified. Mike just stared at him. “What?”

If there was one thing that set Mike off, it was Will putting himself down. “You’re, like, way more skilled than all of them.”

“Right,” Will deadpanned. 

“You don’t believe me?” Mike raised his eyebrows at him. “Will, you’re looking at an art connoisseur. ”

Will cracked a smile. “So, I guess I have to trust your judgment then?” 

“Yes, you do.”

“Okay, fine. Whatever you say, Mr. Art Connoisseur.” 

Mike smiled to himself. “Thank you.”

Will went back to sketching another face next to the one he’d just drawn. This one was a woman. Mike’s smile faltered. He still had a suspicion that Will was seeing someone. The biggest proof was that phone call from last month, but there were more things that had been clues. 

For instance, how Will suddenly had a fascination with jewelry. Mike had seen it when they were headed for the subway station once when Will stopped outside a window and commented on one of the necklaces. As far as Mike knew, Will didn’t wear necklaces. So, the logical explanation was he wasn’t looking for himself; he was looking for someone else. A girl.

And there was this one time that Will got a call and Mike could just barely hear a girl’s voice on the other line and Will rushed to say goodbye and that he’d call her later. As if he didn’t want Mike to know she existed. 

There was always the possibility Mike was overthinking this, but seeing Will draw a girl- a pretty girl- was just a reminder that Will liked girls. And his girlfriend, which most likely existed. And Mike realized for the umpteenth time that he had absolutely no chance with him. Ever.

They ate dinner and Mike explained the very complex, very boring, things he’d been learning in his courses. Will nodded along and tried to make it seem more interesting than it actually was. Afterwards, they sat back on the couch and continued The Karate Kid. Will watched the TV and Mike watched Will. His eyes traced Will’s profile; the slope of his nose, the outline of his lips, the jut of his chin. He bit the inside of his cheek and had to force his eyes away. 

Mike was in over his head. As he often was nowadays. 

“Um, I’m gonna use the restroom,” he told Will, as he stood up. 

Will glanced at him. “Okay.”

Mike headed to the bathroom and shut the door behind him. He stared into his reflection and found himself unkempt and red in the cheeks. Turning on the sink, he splashed a little water on his face to cool him down. “Get ahold of yourself, Mike,” he muttered to himself. “It’s just Will.” While this was supposed to be reassuring and helpful, it was everything but. The problem was that it was Will. 

He exited the restroom and took a seat beside Will once again, hyper aware of the fact that their arms brushed. 

Will looked over at him. “You okay?”
Mike swallowed. “Yeah.” Will nodded and looked back at the TV. Mike let his gaze linger before doing the same. They were at the climax of the movie, close to finishing. They sat in silence and watched for a few minutes. Will broke the silence eventually. 

“I always wished I could fight.”

Mike looked over at Will who was still watching the karate match on screen. “Why?”

Will shrugged. “I don’t know. So I could protect myself, I guess.”

Mike grinned. “Yeah, cause your 12 year old self would have beaten the demogorgon’s ass.”

Will chuckled. “Okay, maybe not.” He stared ahead, his smile fading. 

“I was kidding,” Mike rushed out in a moment of panic, not wanting to make Will sad. 

“I know.” Will blankly watched the TV while Mike tried to study him and figure out what was in his head. “I guess there were a lot of times knowing how to defend myself would’ve been helpful. Not just…in the Upside Down.”

Mike nodded. “Yeah. I think I’ve felt the same way before.” Will hummed a response and kept his eyes ahead. 

When the movie ended, Will took the VHS out and turned the TV off. He sighed and collapsed next to Mike again. The fact he was closer than before now didn’t go unnoticed. 

“I can’t believe winter break starts this week,” Will sighed. “Time is flying by.”

“Adulting does that to you,” Mike groaned. He looked at Will slumped next to him. “What’re your plans for Christmas?”

“I’m flying home in a few days.” Will looked over to Mike. “And you?”

“Uh, same. I didn’t go home for any holidays last year so I kinda owe it to my mom.” Will nodded. Mike sat up a little straighter and continued. “Maybe we could go ice skating or something. With the party, I mean. I think Lucas and Dustin will be back. I’m assuming El will be too. I don’t know about Max…”

“She’ll be there,” Will said. “Visiting her mom I think.”

“Oh,” Mike said. “Then I guess we’ll all be there. Just like old times.”

“Yeah. Old times,” Will smiled. Something caught his eye and Mike could see the idea come to him. Mike followed his gaze to find a set of Uno cards on the coffee table. “Wanna play?”

Mike grinned. “Sure, why not?”

They sat on the floor and Will dealt out the cards. The first round went quickly, and Will won. But Mike insisted that was only because he was just warming up. So, they played again. 

“You cheated!” Will exclaimed when Mike won. 

“Did not! How do you cheat in Uno?” Mike shot back.

“I don’t know,” Will admitted. “But you’d figure out a way.” He collected the cards and began shuffling again. 

Mike scoffed. “You’re just a sore loser.” 

Will rolled his eyes. “Says the person who begged for another round because he said it wasn’t fair that he lost.” 

“I-” Mike frowned, “can’t argue with that.” 

Will laughed. “Giving up so easily, Wheeler?” 

“What can I say? You make a good point.”

“Okay, Michael , whatever you say.” Will smiled down at the cards. “What happened to that fire you used to have? Guess it’s gone.”

Mike’s mouth opened in protest but he couldn’t think of anything to say. “I- I still have it.” 

“Mhm.” Will hummed. 

Mike frowned. The idea of thinking Will thought he wasn’t as fun or fiery as when he was a kid was bothersome. Mike hadn’t changed a bit. He was still the same. “Yes, I do,” he insisted. 

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” 

That was it for Mike. He sprang forward and tackled Will, knocking the cards from his hands which scattered across the floor.  

“Mike!” Will shouted, shocked. Mike had taken them both by surprise. 

“This enough fire for you, William? ” Mike asked while simultaneously wrestling with Will. Will just laughed at him trying to shove him off. He tried to hold down Will’s squirming arms as he, himself, laughed a bit. Mike had to admit they probably looked ridiculous; two full grown men wrestling on the carpet. “I haven’t lost my fire! Admit it!” Will laughed harder, still flailing his arms around trying to get Mike off. 

“Get off-” 

“Say it! Say I haven’t lost my fire!” Mike yelled, cutting Will off. He pinned Will against the carpet and felt his struggling begin to slow. 

“Fine,” Will stopped squirming and between laughs said, “You haven’t lost your fire.” His eyes were teary from laughing so hard and his cheeks were flushed. His hair was messed up and Mike wanted to run his fingers through it and make it even messier. Overall, in the dim light of the living room lamp, Will looked beautiful. And Mike was captivated by it. 

That was when he became aware of the position they were in: Mike straddling Will, hands on his shoulders. And Will was just staring up at him, his smile slightly fading. The longer Mike stayed like that, the harder it was to move. But he had to because too much time had passed with Mike doing nothing. He was going to give himself away. 

However, he couldn’t stop his eyes from flicking to Will’s pink lips. And he couldn’t stop them from continuously moving from Will’s eyes and back to his lips. This action had to be obvious. But Will still said nothing. He just stared up at Mike with an unreadable expression. His lips were just slightly parted and his eyes were wide. Shock maybe? 

All Mike could hear was his and Will’s short breaths and his own rapid heartbeat. Everything else was silent. Even the usually loud and annoying traffic of New York City. Will could hear his heart, he was sure of it. Maybe he could even feel it, with how close they were. Surely if Mike moved just a bit closer, he’d hear it.

Mike’s eyes traveled down to Will’s lips once more with the urge to close the distance and let Will feel how fast his heart was beating. It’d be so easy. He could do it. He was so close. If he just… Screw it.

In a rush of adrenaline and confidence, and without fully comprehending what he was doing, Mike moved in quickly, pressing his lips to Will’s. His palm found Will’s cheek and cupped it gently. It was a quick brush of lips. That was it. But it was so intoxicating and Mike wanted more and Will tasted so sweet and-

Mike felt Will let out a short gasp and he pulled away a bit. When he opened his eyes, he found Will staring, eyebrows knitted together, tears glazing his eyes. Then it dawned on him; the expression Will had was fear. Will was scared. Will was afraid of Mike. 

“Shit,” Mike said breathily, hand retreating from Will’s cheek. He climbed off of him and watched as he slowly sat up. Mike was still breathing heavily, barely grasping what he just did. He looked at Will, who had his head down. “Will-”

“Don’t.” Anything else Mike wanted to say died on his tongue. Will shook his head. He tried to speak a few times, trying to figure out what to say evidently. He took a deep breath. “You’re…years too late, Mike.”

Mike inhaled shakily. “Will, I-”

“I think you should go.” 

Will slowly stood and Mike followed. “Wait, Will, can we talk about this? I just-”

“Just go, Mike. Please.” Will’s voice broke. 

Mike swallowed the lump in his throat and pursed his lips. “Fine.” He grabbed his coat and hat from the hook and walked out the door without looking back.