Chapter Text
Dessert was a huge success. Most years, Rapunzel would have stuck around for games and chatting late into the evening, but she seemed eager to spend alone time with Sylvanas. Elsa had to admit that as intimidating a person Sylvanas was, she pretty much seemed to be whipped.
Hugging Rapunzel before watching her get into the back of Sylvanas’s motorcycle, Elsa told her to call or text her if she needed anything. She didn’t expect to hear from Rapunzel until the morning, though.
“She’s really into her,” Jaina said, as Elsa walked back inside, the fading sound of the motorcycle roaring into the distance. “Sylvanas is a complicated woman. The kind of person who carries many hurts and scars and doesn’t let many people in to help her lick them.”
Elsa glanced back down the road as she closed the door, “Rapunzel might be the right person for her, even if I worry a little.”
“That Sylvanas will walk all over her?”
“That she’ll let her. Raps has a spine of steel, but she doesn’t always let herself rely on it. Gothel - her mother - is a master gaslighter and it’s taken her years to break old habits. We keep trying to encourage her to reach out to some of the close friends she’s lost because of her, but Raps has been a little resistant, and we don’t want to be too pushy.”
Jaina frowned, “Sylvanas does not take kindly to those who harm others more vulnerable, in a way that can be downright dangerous.”
“Dangerous for Gothel?”
“Yes.”
Elsa was less inclined to worry, “Rapunzel won’t let her hurt her, no matter how much pain Gothel has caused her.”
“I would normally say no one ‘lets’ Sylvanas do anything, but she’s downright tender with that woman.” Jaina shook her head, reaching out for Elsa, “And you know what? I’m not even jealous. Come here, I’d much rather focus on us right now.”
Elsa laughed, happy to fold herself into Jaina’s arms, stealing a kiss or six as she did so, “I was hoping you’d want to stay.”
“I was led to believe there’d be board games,” Jaina said. “And I’m going to kick your butts.”
“That and I need someone to help me play chaperone for my sister and Kristoff. If we leave her alone with him I don’t even want to know what we’re going to walk in on.” Elsa knew Anna could get very eager and enthusiastic with everything she did, and when it came to romance and sex that was amplified.
“Just like Sylvanas and Rapunzel, she’s a grown woman who doesn’t need a chaperone,” Jaina reminded her.
“I know. I just want her to know I’ve got her back,” Elsa replied, a sly smile crossing her lips.
Jaina narrowed her eyes, and then started to laugh, “You’re seriously going to cockblock her?”
“Just enough to get under her skin a bit.” Elsa threaded her arms around Jaina’s shoulders, “You’re not an only child, you understand, right?”
“God, I do. Okay, lets play those games and make sure they don’t have a moment’s peace,” Jaina replied, clearly all in on this plan.
***
They played a number of games, ranging from the classics to an obscure game called Dragonmaster that Elsa and Anna liked to use to introduce friends to the family, so to speak. Kristoff did very well, but Jaina was actually terrifyingly good at it. Elsa supposed that was revenge for her creaming them all at Monopoly.
But the true high score was how often she or Jaina would conveniently catch Anna trying to put the moves on Kristoff. By the end of the night, Elsa had a count of three, and Jaina two.
“You’re doing it on purpose,” Anna hissed, poking Elsa in the chest as Elsa was refilling her water. There was no alcohol in the house, and Elsa had only drank a few times in the year since she’d turned twenty-one.
“Doing what?” Elsa asked, innocently, “I swear I didn’t tell Jaina anything about Dragonmaster, she’s just really good at picking up the rules.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about and you know it.” Anna folded her arms, giving her sister her most powerful pout, “It’s not like we’re going to do anything in the kitchen with you in the living room.”
Elsa laughed, “It’s hardly my fault if we leave you alone for longer than 30 seconds you’re making moves.”
“You’ve seen the man right?”
Elsa laughed, then smiled at her and decided to relent, “All right. I’ll just have to be happy our bedrooms are on opposite sides of the house.”
“We have got to figure out what to do with the rest of that space,” Anna complained. “Why do we even still have this place?”
“Because we’re both too sentimental to get rid of it,” Elsa replied. “And someone would probably just buy it and turn it into an airbnb and no one wants that.”
“I mean this would be a cozy place to have a vacation.” Anna tapped her lip, “What about converting it into a multi-family home? As long as we break even on property taxes and utilities we’d be doing good. Our parents left us so much money and stuff and I don’t know what to do with it. We sure as hell don’t need to make a profit.”
From the way Anna was talking, she’d already given this some thought. Elsa was unsure herself if she was on board with the idea, but they could entertain it, “We’ll have to do research. Honestly, the fact I can’t tell you right now how much we’re spending a year to live here makes me uncomfortable.”
“Right, so we figure out how much a year covers taxes and the basic utilities, divide by 12. Divide that by 3-4 families,” Anna counted on her fingers. “Then add a bit on the top to put into a repair and maintenance fund. Oh and more people means higher utilities. But I don’t want people to have to spend too much. If it costs like $600 to house a family we shouldn’t charge more than $700, and that extra can go into the repair fund.”
Anna put her hands on her hips, “While I’m at it, why the fuck isn’t garbage collection government run? That’s basic sanitation!”
“Or we could convert it into a place for our friends to all live together, which would still be a hell of a lot cheaper than rent,” Elsa said. She made a face, “Why are we on this conversation again?”
“You brought up house size because you don’t want to listen to my screaming orgasms and don’t want me listening to yours.”
Elsa planted her hand on her face, “Oh god. That’s it, Jaina isn’t getting laid for Christmas.”
Anna swatted her arm, “Don’t be mean. As if you can keep your hands off of each other.”
“...it’s rather amazing how hard it is to stop myself.”
“It’s amazing to watch.” Anna squeezed her in a tight hug, “You’re always so socially awkward with strangers that I figured you’d just crush on people at a distance forever. But you’re so relaxed around her. I’m happy for you.”
“I’m happy for you too,” Elsa told her. “Kristoff is special. If Jaina hadn’t been here he would have won Dragonmaster.”
“I know! You do realize that means they’re both keepers,” Anna poked her shoulder.
It was true, the unwritten rule of Dragonmaster was it was a good sign to play well the first time. According to their mother, it was their father’s playing that had made her decide to keep dating him despite not at all getting along with his father.
“Mom and dad loved each other so much,” She said, pulling Anna into her arms and squeezing her.
“You okay?” Anna asked, worriedly. She squeezed her back, “It’s not New Years yet, but …”
Elsa nodded, “I’m feeling really good, I promise. Just talking about the game reminded me of some things. Like the way they’d look at each other. Casual touches and intimacy. How silly they’d get during game night. Remembering the good times, not how they died.”
”Have you ever told Jaina?” Anna asked, “About … any of it?”
Sighing, Elsa shook her head, “She knows they’re gone, obviously. I don’t think its ever come up how. And I know she’s seen my scars but she’s never asked about it.”
Anna squeezed her again, “If she’s as good as I think she is, I think you’ll be fine.”
Elsa nodded along, thinking this wasn’t the time to talk about the accident or her own depression-spiral that had followed. Never was probably the time she wanted to talk about it with her girlfriend, but the idea didn’t actually terrify her. The terrifying part was the fact that unlocking her Deep Tragic Lore was a sign of how serious things had gotten with Jaina.
Jaina did notice a subtle shift in her mood when she sat down again, and placed her hand on her knee, “Everything okay?”
“Yes.” She put her hand on top of Jaina’s, “I’ve decided we’ve tormented Anna enough, though.”
As if right on cue, Anna came in, grabbed Kristoff’s hand, and pulled him out of the room. Elsa followed them with her eyes then shook her head and laughed.
“I think we’re alone now,” Jaina said, pulling Elsa into her lap and kissing her soundly. Elsa kissed her back, realizing she’d been needing to taste her much more badly than she’d realized. Whimpering softly, she tangled her fingers in Jaina’s hair and tried to express all of her emotions in that singular kiss. Hopes and fears and everything in between.
When she broke the kiss and slid to her feet, Elsa pulled Jaina up with her, leading her through the first floor and then up the stairs.
Jaina whispered, “You weren’t kidding about this place. I could get lost in here.”
“I think the only reason I have any love for it is that I grew up here and it was my parents’.” She pulled Jaina into her room, “And if we let it go, it will be like fully letting them go.”
Her bedroom was the larger of the two, if only because she was older. One side had her bed, dresser and nightstand, and the other held a desk with a large computer monitor. She and Anna used to share a sort of office space but Elsa had preferred a quieter working and gaming space.
A massive cage was along the wall a few feet from the desk, where Elsa’s babies resided; four albino rats currently napping in a pile in their hammock.
“You don’t really talk about them all that much,” Jaina brushed her knuckles alongside Elsa’s cheek. “I can tell it’s a painful subject. I’m not saying you should talk right now, but I’m here to listen if you ever want to or need to.”
“It was a long time ago.” Elsa sat on her bed and looked up at Jaina, “Six years, give or take. I was sixteen. We were driving back from a New Years Eve party. I was driving, I mean. Dad was a little too tipsy and obviously I hadn’t drank anything. I was so proud of the responsibility. I’d literally just gotten my license a few days before.”
Jaina’s expression shifted a little, and she sat down next to her, “I’m so sorry.”
Elsa shrugged, but leaned into Jaina when she put her arm around her, “I blamed myself, you know? Not the other driver. Mom and dad did what they were supposed to, but he didn’t. But I was the one driving, so it was my fault. My fault that they died, my fault Anna spent a week in the hospital. One thing that didn’t help was I walked away with only a few bruises and a gash in my forehead.”
“Elsa-”
She held up a finger, “I know that’s not true. The only one at fault was the drunk man driving the other car. But it took me years of therapy and a lot of dark moments to get to that point.” Elsa swallowed, looking into Jaina’s eyes. It wasn’t the romantic moment she’d wanted but it had also been a good opening, a good moment to share. And she’d found that she really, really wanted to share, to let Jaina into this part of her past. It was terrifying and freeing all at once.
New Years would be harder, but it might be easier with someone besides Anna who knew why it was so hard, “I can’t say there won’t be down points. But I’ve been doing a lot better than I was.”
Taking Elsa’s hand, Jaina brought it to her lips, kissing a finger tip, and then another, her lips moving down her palm and over a faint scar on her wrist. Elsa shivered, tears pricking at her eyes. Jaina didn’t say anything, she didn’t need to, but Elsa still felt as if she just had said everything she needed to say.
“I love you,” Elsa whispered, voice shaking, the hand against Jaina’s mouth trembling.
Jaina kissed her wrist again, then moved up her arm, kissing her inner elbow and then her shoulder. Then she kissed her jaw and her cheek, and brushed her lips against Elsa’s, “I want you to know I’m saying this not because I feel somehow obligated to say it back, but because I really mean it. I love you, Elsa, scars and all.”