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Chapter Text

May 22, 1961

The silence in the room was suddenly replaced with an ear splitting screech. A cotton wrapped bundle was gently placed on Walburga Black’s bare, sweat drenched chest. With her head still resting on the overly fluffed pillows, she stared up at the cream colored ceiling, not yet ready to look at the child she’d just birthed. Soon, her breathing evened out and she slowly moved her head down to examine the infant in her arms. Walburga was almost afraid to open her eyes; she had to please Orion.

A sigh of relief burst from her lungs and she laughed slightly as she took in the sight of the blue blanket which swaddled her son. The boy’s crying ceased as his eyes connected with his mother’s. Walburga laughed again, this time at her own expense. She had been so worried, for no reason at all. She produced another heir, as was her duty.

"My perfect boy."

She looked up at the mediwitch who stood at the end of her bed, “you may send him in, now,” Walburga commanded sternly. The mediwitch nodded and exited the small delivery room of St. Mungo’s hospital.

Moments later, Orion Black strolled in with a skeptical look in his eye. “What is it?” Orion asked, his voice gravelly.

“Another heir.”

“Then he will be called Regulus Arcturus Black.”

Chapter Text

August 31, 1971

Large drops of rain pounded against the windows of 12 Grimmauld Place as thunder violently shook the London home. The dark interior of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black mirrored the gloomy weather which had taken hold over Britain for the past few days. Heavy, dark green curtains hung stiffly over the many large windows, black and gray Persian rugs clung to the ebony stained hardwood floors, and a fire crackled in the Italian marble fireplace of the Black family’s library. Huddled closely together on the floor in front of the fireplace were two boys, both in deep thought over a game of wizard chess.

The one boy, older and a bit broader, had grown his midnight black hair down past his chin- much to his mother’s disapproval. His gray slacks were wrinkled, his wool socks mismatched, and his sweater was both backwards as well as inside out. He hunched over the board, resting his chin in his hand. The other boy, younger and lean, sat with his legs neatly crossed and his back straight. His equally dark hair was slicked back and to the side. His clothes were similar to that of his older brother’s but not nearly as unkept. 

“You can’t beat me again! How is it you always beat me?” Sirius furrowed his brow before commanding his knight to move further down the board.

Regulus shrugged, while ordering his knight to do the same, “check mate.”

“It’s your calm disposition, Reggie” Sirius stood from his spot on the floor, “I can’t ever tell what you’re thinking.”

“That’s how you win the game, though. Learn not to let others see too much,” Regulus began to clean up their game, “you know your sweater is inside out.”

“ And backwards,” Sirius added triumphantly. 

Regulus rolled his eyes as he returned the chess board to its place on the shelf.

“Why do you do it?” Regulus asked without turning to face his brother.

“Do what?” there was a note of mischief in Sirius’ tone.

Regulus spun around, tears threatening to leak from his eyes, “why do you push her, Sirius? Why do you act out like this?”

The older boy’s face dropped slightly at the sight of his frightened and angered brother. He was supposed to protect him, make him feel safe, but instead he constantly hurt him whether it be intentional or not. Even if Regulus wasn’t being punished directly, watching Sirius get beaten and cursed hurt him, too. 

“Oaky, okay,” Sirius removed his sweater and then returned it to its proper position, “better?”  

Regulus wiped his eyes with the back of his hand, “don’t leave me, Sirius.”

“It’s just for one year, Reg,” he put a hand on his brother’s shoulder, “then you’ll be there with me, yeah?”

“Promise you’ll write.”

“I promise. It’ll be Christmas holiday before you know it and I’ll be right back here with you, okay?”

“Okay,” Regulus sniffled. 

“It’s getting late, we should go to bed,” Sirius turned towards the door, “big day tomorrow,” he pumped his fist into the air before he vanished up the stairs. 

“Yeah, big day tomorrow,” Regulus mumbled, unable to hold back the steady stream of tears he’d been bottling up. 

***

September 1, 1971

Warm sunlight poured in through the windows of Regulus’ bedroom. The light burned through to the inside of his eyelids, causing the boy to stir as he drifted out of sleep. The soft silk of his pillows and the weighted fluff of his blanket were warm and comforting. That kind of feeling was fleeting in his home and young Regulus knew well to take advantage of it while he could. There were very few moments where he could just breathe easily and keep his eyes closed without fear, without having to constantly be on edge.

The warmth and peacefulness of the morning was gone all too soon as the wrath of Walburga Black came flying down the hallway.

“Sirius Orion Black, you get back here this instant!” she screeched as she chased her eldest son past Regulus’ bedroom door, “ Locomotor Mortis! ”

A loud thud was followed by Sirius’ yelp of pain.

“I think my nose is broken,” Regulus could hear Sirius cry from the hall. 

“You’re lucky if that’s all that’s broken, you wretched animal. What did I tell you about your robes?”

Regulus didn’t hear Sirius answer, a moment passed before he heard the smack of Walburga’s palm against his brother’s cheek.

“Answer me when I am speaking to you!”

“You told me I had to fold them properly, so that they wouldn’t wrinkle in my trunk,” Sirius’ voice cracked.

“And what did you do instead?”

Another smack.

“I’m sorry!”

“I do not like to repeat myself.”

“I just threw my robes in there. I didn’t bother to fold them. I’ll fix it mother, please let go of my legs!”

Another moment passed and Sirius could be heard sprinting back down the hall to his room. There was a light knock on Regulus’ door and he turned away before his mother entered, wiping away his fresh tears. Walburga slowly made her way over to her youngest son and sat at the edge of his bed.

“Good morning, my perfect boy,” she stroked Regulus’ cheek with the back of her hand.

Moving her fingers through his hair, she spoke softly, “Kreacher has just finished preparing breakfast. We must leave for the station soon to see your brother off to Hogwarts.”

Without opening his eyes, Regulus managed to whisper, “yes, mother.”

“Hurry now,” she patted his shoulder, then swiftly exited the room.

Soon, Regulus was sitting directly across from a very sour looking Sirius. His eyes were blotchy, his nose crooked, and his left cheek slightly bruised. They each picked at their toast and porridge, having lost their appetite very early on in the morning. Regulus couldn’t help but think that maybe his mother would soon treat him as she did Sirius, once he was the only one at home for her to unleash her anger out on. He shook the image from his mind. He was her perfect boy after all.

At the head of the long kitchen table, Walburga sat, sipping her tea. She looked between her sons with curious eyes. She never quite understood the bond between the boys. Then again, she had never understood where she had gone wrong with Sirius. He was a good and quiet baby and then he suddenly became rambunctious and wild, always out to spite her. Whereas Regulus had always had such poise and a clarity about him. Her sons couldn’t be more different, yet they were joined at the hip. Not for long . She smirked at the thought of having Regulus all to herself. Walburga was happy to send Sirius away. Maybe once he’d become acquainted with other like minded Slytherins, he’d come home as a new wizard. Maybe he’d finally live up to his name. Until then, she was happy to have him gone. 

“If you two are done eating, it’s about time we head for Kings Cross, hm?” Walburga snapped her fingers and Kreacher appeared with a crack .

“Mistress?” the house elf bowed.

“Clean this up. While we’re gone, make sure the drapes are dusted as well as the paintings. Remember, Orion is to return from the Ministry early tonight and he does not want supper to be kept waiting.”

“Kreacher lives to serve Mistress Black.”

Walburga turned to her children, “alright then, out we go.”

***

“Always crawling with filthy muggles,” Walburga seethed as the three Blacks weaved through Kings Cross. At the sight of the brick pillar between platforms 9 and 10, Sirius was suddenly over the morning’s events and was hopping from foot to foot. The day had finally arrived, and Sirius had been most excited to cross the boundary to reach platform 9 ¾.

“Best take a running start,” she directed Sirius without taking her glaring eyes off the muggles who strolled by.

Without hesitation, Sirius hurled toward the brick wall with his trunk and owl perched on the trolley ahead of him. In the blink of an eye, he vanished. Regulus’ heart fluttered, knowing his turn was next. He grasped his mother’s hand as they both quickly stepped through the magical wall. On the other side, wizards and witches bustled about. Owls hooted and the train whistled. Young Hogwarts students gathered about and talked eagerly about the year to come. Regulus was extremely jealous. 

“Now Sirius,” Walburga’s voice snapped Regulus out of his daze, “you will behave. If you need anything, you can go to Narcissa. She’s a prefect this year, so don’t think she’ll let you get away with anything. She will tell me if you step out of line.”

“Yes, mother,” Sirius was looking down at his shoes.

“Off you go, then,” she patted his shoulder.

Sirius looked up with sad eyes, “are you going to fix my nose before I get on the train?”

Walburga snorted, “not a chance,” her smile was sinister, “you can show all your new little friends what discipline looks like and maybe next time you won’t blatantly disrespect me again.”

The shock on Sirius’ face quickly turned to anger and resentment. Before getting on the train, Sirius turned to Regulus and tried to force a smile. The pain it caused Regulus to see his brother beaten and hurt was eating away at him. He didn’t want to say goodbye.

“I’ll write. I promise,” Sirius engulfed his younger brother in a tight hug, “be good, Reggie.”

The embrace was over all too soon. Before he knew it, Regulus was watching his brother wave from an open window on the Hogwarts Express as it rolled away from the platform. Walburga’s icy hand on his shoulder sent a shiver down his spine. He wanted to pull away, but her grasp had him frozen where he stood.

Chapter Text

The train had barely left the station before Walburga began to lead Regulus through the masses with her boney hand digging into the back of his neck. 

“The moment we get home I am going to bathe the filthy muggle germs off of you. Who knows what kind of disgusting diseases they’ve cooked up.”

“Mother, I can bathe myself,” Regulus pleaded.

“Nonsense, I want you to be properly cleaned.”

Back within the walls of 12 Grimmauld Place, Walburga stripped Regulus of his clothes with the swish of her wand. The boy, just ten years old, stood in the center of the bathroom bare and cold. He felt his cheeks flush as his mother’s eyes grazed over him slightly. Then Walburga turned to set the temperature of the bath water. Once it was just warm enough, yet not too hot, Regulus stepped in and submerged his small body below the surface of the fragrant water. Regulus closed his eyes as his mother began to scrub his skin, too harshly, with a bristle brush. 

Walburga repeated to herself, “filthy muggles tainting my perfect boy.”

As she continued to clean, her hands moved lower and Regulus’ eyes shut tighter.

***

November 3, 1971

With a jolt, Regulus sat straight up in his bed, his hair sticking to his forehead and neck with sweat. He breathed deeply, trying to shake the dream from his mind. Though it wasn’t just a dream, it was a memory. A memory which continued to take a physical form a few times a month. Regulus held back his sobs as he gasped for air. Once he had settled down, he walked to the bathroom and splashed icy cold water over his face. 

Almost every morning since Sirius had left for Hogwarts began with Regulus waking up terrified and sick to his stomach. Regulus still had to wait over a month for his brother to return home, but a part of him didn’t want Sirius to come back. After finding out her eldest son had been sorted into Gryffindor, Walburga Black went on a full rampage. Late on September first, after supper had been eaten and cleaned up and Orion spoke on and on about new bills being presented to the Ministry, Walburga received an owl from Narcissa with the news. 

“The treacherous little monster!” Walburga screamed and promptly lit the drawing room drapes on fire just with the strength of her anger. 

Wasting no time at all, she began writing a howler. 

“Sirius Orion Black, you have brought great shame upon your family! How dare you embarrass us in such a way? You have single handedly destroyed one of the oldest Black traditions. Salazar himself is rolling in his grave. You have tainted our family with the likes of blood traitors and mudbloods . You best enjoy these next few months, because the holidays will not be kind to you.”

Regulus had hid under his bed all evening. Petrified of what Walburga would do once she settled down. She would want to seek out her perfect boy and try to instill in him everything Sirius was without.

On Sirius’ birthday, Walburga and Orion didn’t even think to send their eldest son a gift, let alone a card. Unfortunately for Regulus, since Sirius’ sorting, the two had conversed very little. Walburga did not want any of Sirius’ treacherous ideas to infiltrate Regulus’ mind. However, Regulus was determined to send his brother at least a letter, to remind him that he still had someone at home who cared about him. 

Dear Sirius,

Happy birthday, big brother! I hope this owl finds you well. I know we have not spoken in weeks, but as I’m sure you’ve figured out, mother is still quite angry with your sorting. Though it doesn’t bother me much, I am upset that we won’t be in the same house when I come to Hogwarts next year. I know you didn’t get sorted into Gryffindor on purpose, but it did hurt a little bit when I first heard the news. 

I’m sorry I can’t send you any proper gifts, but I promise to make it up to you. I hope you’re having fun at Hogwarts, I can’t wait to be there with you. It must be nice learning loads of magic and being able to practice whenever you want. Last week, I woke up so scared my pillows exploded and there were feathers everywhere. That’s not exactly the type of magic I like to be doing day in and day out. 

I’m looking forward to you coming home for Christmas, but I am a bit worried about mother and father. They’re still quite angry with you. I heard you’ve been pulling pranks at Hogwarts, and that’s only making mother more upset. Please Sirius, I know you’re just having fun but I don’t like when she’s upset. 

I hope you’re able to write back. If not, I’ll see you on the platform in December. It feels so far away, but I hope it goes quickly. Tell Cissy I say hello. 

Love,

R.A.B.

***

December 22, 1971

Retrieving Sirius from platform 9 ¾ was almost exactly the same as dropping him off months prior. Almost . As the train pulled into the station and students poured out from the open doors, colliding with their families who waited for them, Regulus spotted his brother. His black hair poked out from a sea of red and gold robes and scarves. 

Regulus watched as his brother joyfully shook hands with three other boys. One with hair almost as dark at Sirius’, though he wore round rimmed glasses and a goofy grin, the second was quite a bit taller than each of them, his sandy hair was cut short and he looked a bit sickly, the last boy was short and pudgy but just as happy as the first. The boys looked quite pleased with one another as they said their goodbyes, patted each other on the back, and walked their separate ways. Regulus felt a pang of jealousy, wishing he were one of those boys.  

Once Sirius caught sight of his brother, he sprinted towards him, abandoning his trunk behind him. He practically jumped on Regulus, engulfing him in a dangerously tight hug.

“I missed you, too,” Regulus managed to squeak out, his jealousy forgotten.

“That’s enough,” Walburga pinched Sirius’ ear, ending the brother’s reunion.

“Mother,” Sirius nodded, though a smirk pulled at his lips. 

Walburga tapped Sirius’ Gryffindor robes once with her wand, transfiguring them to appear all black.

“You will not come into my home wearing such ghastly robes, in the future you will be wise to change before stepping off that train.”

***

December 24,1971

If there was anything the Noble and Most Ancient house of Black did better than any other wizarding family, it would be Christmas galas. Almost the entirety of the sacred twenty-eight, as well as extended family from across Europe, would arrive at 12 Grimmauld Place on Christmas Eve in their most extravagant and expensive robes. There would be live music, plenty of food and drinks, and of course dancing. For one day a year, the London home would be full of people, laughter, and light. It was the one thing the two heirs to the Black name looked forward to each holiday season.

In the few days between Sirius’ return home and the gala itself, Sirius and Regulus were to assist Kreacher in decorating the ballroom, which was kept locked during the rest of the year. There was an ample amount of dust, cobwebs, and cornish pixies within the ballroom and it took ages for it to be all sorted without the use of magic. Kreacher quietly enjoyed the two boys' struggle and they swept away the years worth of debris. 

The morning of the gala, Walburga enchanted the high marble ceiling to reflect snowfall, much like the great hall at Hogwarts. She took pleasure in watching Regulus’ eyes light up at the use of her magic. The moment was instantly ruined as Sirius came sliding across the newly waxed floors, in his socks, threatening to topple over the many decorated evergreens. A low growl formed in the back of her throat. 

“Sirius, if you cannot behave yourself, you can spend the rest of the holiday locked in Kreacher’s cupboard. Am I understood?”

Mid slide, Sirius came to a halt, his arms stretched out in front of him to keep his balance. His gray eyes were bulging at the threat. 

“Yes- yes, mother,” he nodded earnestly.

“Good,” Walburga composed herself, “we have some very important guests joining us tonight, I do not want you making a fool of us. Merlin forbid, I have to jinx my own heir in front of half the wizarding community.”

Regulus flinched at the threat. 

“Now, both of you, go get your dress robes on. Our first guests should be arriving within the hour,” Walburga placed a gentle hand on Regulus’ cheek. He wanted to run away, but he couldn’t. Was Walburga’s magic powerful enough to hold him in place with a single touch? Regulus didn’t let the thought linger.

“My perfect boy, I’ve set your robes out for you. You are going to be the star of the show this evening, everyone is going to love you,” she kissed his forehead gently, though there was no warmth behind her frigid lips.

Regulus and Sirius exited the ballroom, making sure to keep quiet until Walburga was out of earshot. The two brothers had not spoken properly since Sirius had returned to Grimmauld Place.

“Sirius?” Regulus let his curiosity get the better of him.

“Yeah?”

“Who were those boys on the platform, the ones you were saying goodbye to?” The other Gryffindors.   

“My new mates! Peter Pettigrew, Remus Lupin, and James Potter.”

“ Potter ?” Remus stopped dead in his tracks, “mother and father say the Potters are blood traitors.”

“Oh, please,” Sirius waved his hand, “all the more reason to be friends with him.”

“But this is exactly the kind of thing mother will get upset about,” Regulus tried to reason with his brother, “I’m sure he’s nice and all, but you’re going to get into trouble hanging about the wrong sort.”

“ Wrong sort ?” Sirius snorted, “you sound just like them.”

“I’m just looking out for you.”

Taking Regulus by the shoulders, Sirius spun the boy around to look him straight in the eye, “I don’t need you looking out for me. That’s my job.”

“If you really wanted to look out for me, then you’d listen to mother! You have no idea what it’s been like without you here.”

The mischief in Sirius’ eyes vanished, “what has she been doing to you?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Regulus sniffled, “but if you keep getting into trouble, she won’t stop.”

Sirius sighed, “fine, I’ll keep quiet for the rest of the year. But once you come to Hogwarts, I’m back on my game.”

Regulus didn’t want to stop Sirius from having his fun, but if the pranks stopped then the cause of Regulus’ nightmares might stop, too. Once he was at Hogwarts, Walburga couldn’t touch him and Sirius would be free to do whatever he liked. 

“Deal,” Regulus stuck out his hand.

Sirius spat into his own palm, “spit on it.”

Cringing, Regulus did the same and they shook their wet palms in agreement.

“Deal,” Sirius grinned.

***

Regulus stared back at his reflection, his dark green dress robes were tailored perfectly to his proportions. The collar of his stiff black undershirt scratched a bit at the base of his neck. His black dress shoes were polished to perfection. Regulus fiddled with the silver chain around his neck; on the chain was a large House of Black amulet which hung just above the boy’s sternum. His hair had grown out slightly, but he was still able to slick it back and to the side with ease. The only issue he had with his appearance was the dark purple circles under his light gray eyes. No matter what he did, the circles wouldn’t go away and they were stark against his pale complection. He was tempted to ask his mother for eye cream, but didn’t want to appear vain. 

There was a knock at the door and his heartbeat quickened momentarily before he realized it was only Sirius. His brother was dressed similarly, only his dress robes were black and his undershirt green. His long hair looked as if it had actually been washed and combed, thank Merlin. The curled locks were tucked neatly behind his ears. Regulus wore a necklace, whereas Sirius donned a silver ring. The brothers were roughly the same height, and aside from a slight difference in width and in their hair, the main discrepancy was in their faces. Sirius’ eyes were bright and alert, a grin almost always present, and his cheeks just slightly fuller. Regulus looked tired and more sunken than his older brother. There was no mistaking one for the other.

“You ready, Reggie?” Sirius was beaming.

Regulus scratched the back of his head, a bit uncomfortable in his dress robes, “I guess so.”

“I hear the Burke family is coming tonight and I know for a fact they have a daughter your age,” Sirius wiggled his eyebrows.

“Piss off, S,” Regulus playfully shoved his brother and the two bounded down the stairs. 

The ballroom was already bustling by the time the boys strolled in. Every robe and gown was either black or jewel toned, the witches wore extravagant headpieces and the wizards carried ornate canes. House elves scurried about with little silver trays, offering champagne and hors devours.  A witch, perhaps part Veela, sat in the center of the room playing a harp. Its tune was captivating. Just as Sirius and Regulus collected their barings, Walburga ambushed them with the most high profile guests. 

“Eugenia, I am pleased to introduce you to my sons, Sirius and Regulus. Sirius has just begun his first year at Hogwarts, receiving top marks this term.”

Regulus and Sirius exchanged a nervous glance. Walburga never spoke highly of Sirius.

“Regulus here,” Walburga grasped her son’s shoulder, “will be at Hogwarts next year, though he is already highly educated in the history of magic.”

The witch extended a hand to each boy, “Eugenia Jenkins, Minister for Magic,” she introduced herself.

The Minister for Magic in our home? Regulus wondered. A Minister had never come to a Black Christmas Gala before. The boys were then introduced to countless high ranking Ministry officials, former quidditch stars, and esteemed members of business and other magical trades. The brothers were helping themselves to an assortment of treacle tarts and pumpkin pasties, when Walgurba ushered over a tall and slender man. He was in his forties, likely around the same age as Orion and Walburga, though he looked slightly younger. He was objectively handsome, though his features were almost snake like. 

“Sirius, Regulus,” the look in Walburga’s eyes could kill, “ this is an old friend of mine from Hogwarts, Tom Riddle.”

The man held a hand up in Walburga’s direction and spoke coolly, “Lord Voldemort now, Walburga. Do be kind to remember it.”

Regulus and Sirius both had their mouths full of treats, unsure whether to laugh at the man’s chosen name or run for cover as he had just corrected their mother, who was never wrong- ever. They looked at each other and then at Walburga, who raised her brows, waiting for her boys to respond. Regulus gulped down his pumpkin pasty with effort, and dusted off his hands.

“Regulus Black, sir,” he graciously extended his right hand. 

Sirius was not as quick to exchange pleasantries. He eyed the curious man up and down, chewing his treacle tart slowly. Then, to Walburga’s horror, Sirius licked the sugar from his fingers, one by one, with a pop as each receded from his lips. Then he put out his hand for the Dark Lord to shake.

Before either boy, or Tom, could react, Walburga backhanded Sirius so hard he spun and fell to the floor. A small trickle of blood began to flow from his cheekbone. The man just smirked, a captivating and sinister look. He looked to Regulus as if the greeting had gone exactly as hoped. 

“Now, Walburga, boys will be boys. You know how Avery, Lestrange, and I got up to such antics at Hogwarts.”

Walburga straightened her shoulders and adjusted her robes, “yes, of course. Though it seems, my boy has some manners to work on. Nevermind him, Regulus here is our perfect image of poise, wouldn’t you agree?”

Their eyes shifted to the youngest Black. Even Sirius, still on the floor with one hand held to his cheek, was looking at his brother curiously, wondering what his next steps would be. Lord Voldemort got down on one knee, now eye level with Regulus, and spoke gently, “I hear you’re quite amiable and compliant, young Regulus, as well as brilliant in many of your at-home subjects. I am quite excited to see what you accomplish at Hogwarts.”

Regulus could only nod as a sign of gratitude. 

“As for you ,” Voldemort turned towards Sirius, “I hear you have top marks in your classes, yet you lack basic understanding of the rules. It would be in your best interest to listen to your mother. She knows best, of course.”

Sirius looked absolutely disgusted, as if someone had set off dungbombs right under his nose. Lord Voldemort stood slowly, then turned back to a pale faced Walburga. It was both fascinating and terrifying for Regulus to see his mother so outranked. He never imagined Walburga being scared of anyone.

“If you’d be so kind, Walburga, I’d love to come visit your sons again. There is so much happening in our world, and they should be properly prepared for what’s to come. I see great promise in them.”

Walburga struggled to find her voice, but eventually stammered, “yes-yes of course my Lord. I’d be happy to have you back, whenever you’d like.”

“Splendid,” he turned towards the boys and nodded at each of them before heading back into the crowd.

Once he was gone, Walburga pulled Sirius to his feet by his ear, the fire in her eyes burning.

“How dare you!” she pulled again on his ear and Sirius winced in pain, “I did not raise you to be a disrespectful, insufferable, little twat.”

Sirius opened his mouth, likely to give a witty comeback, then he thought better of it. Instead, the boy just nodded and Walburga removed her grip on him. She looked him dead in the eyes, a murderous look that would make any other child cry in terror. 

“I will not punish you further in front of our guests,” she spoke and Sirius sighed in relief, “but I can promise you that until you’re back on that train you will experience the worst pain imaginable.”

Over a week of punishments. Regulus stared at his brother, his mouth agape. Walburga had always been harsh with Sirius, but this was something else. Sure, Sirius had crossed the line, but did his actions really warrant Walburga’s reaction? They both knew she’d follow through; it wasn’t a threat, but a promise. Her expression softened when she turned to Regulus. She took the boy’s chin in her hand, looked as if she were about to say something, then sighed and turned away back into the crowd. 

“Bloody hell, S,” Regulus’ eyes were still wide as he turned towards his brother, “why did you do that ?”

Sirius shrugged, “he was a slimy bloke, rubbed me the wrong way.”

“Do you have any idea of what she’s capable of? She’s going to kill you, Sirius.” Regulus was quite sure Walburga could and would kill her eldest son if she felt motivated.

“Ah, Reg, you worry too much,” Sirius then spotted something from across the ballroom and changed gears, “alight baby brother, I got a mission for you.”

Regulus tried to follow Sirius’ line of vision, but he wasn’t exactly sure what to be looking for. Sirius grabbed him by the shoulders and pointed through the many witches and wizards. Eventually, he noticed a long mane of golden hair attached to a young girl in dark blue robes. Her robes mimicked the night sky and shifted as she moved.

“ That ,” Sirius continued to point, “is Pandora Burke. Her brother Prometheus is in Slytherin, a year above me, and shockingly not a tosser. Now, go play nice.”

Sirius shoved Regulus in the direction of the girl. Without having much of a warning, Regulus tripped over his robes, almost falling face forward, but caught his balance just in time. He stumbled forward slightly before straightening. Unfortunately for him, the young witch saw it all. She giggled behind her hand.

“Are you okay?” The girl’s voice was sweet and melodic. 

Stammering a bit, Regulus cleared his throat, “uh, yes, yes I’m alright.”

The two stood in silence, both awkwardly looking about and unable to make eye contact. Eventually Regulus was able to muster up some courage, though he could feel his cheeks burning.

He extended his right hand, “Black. Regulus Black.”

The girl’s small fingers wrapped gently around his hand and she curtseyed slightly, “Pandora Burke, though something tells me you already knew that.”

Suddenly, Pandora’s hair changed to a bright pink. Regulus jumped back in surprise, breaking their headshake. Pandora shook her head and the pink faded away and turned back to her natural golden locks. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment as Regulus tried to make sense of what he’d seen.

“You’re a- a, um-” Regulus knew the word, but couldn’t get it out.

“A metamorphmagus,” Pandora confirmed.

Awestruck, Regulus regained his focus, “that is an incredibly rare gift.”

Pandora poked out her tongue a bit and turned away, “sure a gift . If I don’t put all my energy into controlling it, anyone could easily read how I’m feeling.”

“But you could change your appearance into anything .”

“Within reason,” a mischievous smile pulled at her lips, “I’m still learning. Some people think it’s unnatural, though.”

Regulus scoffed, “if that’s unnatural, then so is magic.”

What Regulus thought was an innocent joke, clearly rubbed Pandora the wrong way. She gasped and looked around anxiously, before pulling Regulus to the nearest wall. Her grip on his forearm was surprisingly tight.

“What?” he pulled his arm back, slightly annoyed by the girl’s actions.

“You cannot be making jokes like that, especially not here,” Pandora whispered, “there are many people here who I’ve heard are extremely worried about protecting their magic. There’s quite the majority of witches and wizards who believe muggles and squibs are the unnatural ones.”

This was well known to Regulus, though he didn’t think Pandora’s paranoia was justified.

“It was just a joke,” he argued.

Pandora pursed her lips, “I’ve heard some very dark conversations tonight, Regulus. Things that would make your skin crawl.”

“Then you clearly haven’t met my mother,” Regulus gave a sad smile.

“I have actually,” Pandora’s eyes widened, “though I don’t feel comfortable speaking ill of her to you.”

Regulus was taken aback by this. This girl was a complete stranger to him. Who was she to speak badly about anyone in his family, even if it was Walburga?

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Regulus shook his head.

“Being able to change my appearance, even just slightly, allows me to see and hear more than most. I’m also completely incapable of lying.”

“How’s that?”

“If I lie, even the smallest bit, my hair turns into flames. It doesn’t hurt me at all, but it scares the pixies out of mostly everyone else.”

Regulus was highly skeptical, “prove it.”

“I am not nervous at all about attending Hogwarts next year,” instantly the girl’s hair went up in orange flames.

Scared once again, Regulus tripped backwards over his robes and landed on his bum. Pandora took a deep breath and her hair slowly turned back. She offered her hand and helped Regulus to his feet.

“Why are you nervous about attending Hogwarts?” Regulus asked as he straightened his robes.

“I’m afraid I won’t make any friends, that people will either hate me for being a metamorphmagus or try to use me because of it. I’m afraid to be sorted into Slytherin, but also afraid of being sorted anywhere else,” Pandora spoke very quickly, Regulus had to put all his energy into focusing on her words in order to keep up.

“What’s wrong with Slytherin?”

“Nothing, everything,” Pandora sighed and slid her back down the wall until she was seated upon the floor.

Having just gotten up from the floor, Regulus huffed, and then took a seat beside her.

“My entire family has been in Slytherin, well everyone except Sirius. I couldn’t imagine being placed anywhere else.”

“My brother is in Slytherin, he hears a lot about dark magic. He does his best to keep out of it, but some of the older kids are a bit mean. I don’t want to have to defend myself when it comes to that, I’m not very confident. I don’t like confrontation.”

“You’d have your brother to look out for you, though. That’s what big brothers do. And if you are sorted into Slytherin, I’d be there right alongside you,” Regulus tried to sound encouraging, but the mention of dark magic was a bit unsettling. 

“You’d stand up for me? If you had to, I mean.”

Regulus shrugged, “sure, I wouldn’t let a girl get picked on.”

“I’m just really worried about what they may say. Nobody is going to want to be friends with a girl who can’t lie and whose appearance changes without warning.”

With a sudden sense of duty, Regulus straightened his shoulders and raised his chin, “I’ll be your friend, Pandora. You don’t have to worry about a thing.”

Pandora’s hair then turned bright pink, but she did not shake it away.

Chapter Text

March 31, 1972

The months between Christmas and Easter went by much faster than the previous term. After Sirius had returned to Hogwarts- escorted to the platform by Orion, rather than Walburga- Regulus was kept quite busy with his at-home studies and writing back and forth to Pandora. Christmas had come and gone with little celebrations. The boys were gifted the standard Black family heirlooms, new robes, and books. The family of four ate dinner together in the main dining room, and that was it. There were no special traditions, no caroling, or games. 

The week that followed was torturous. Regulus couldn’t escape the screams of his brother. Night and day, Walburga would jinx, hex, and curse her eldest son until he begged, and pleaded with her, to stop. He spent a few nights locked in the basement of 12 Grimmauld Place. Sirius’ sobs echoed throughout the house. Though Regulus couldn’t stand to hear his brother suffer, he was grateful that Walburga had set all her energy into her punishments. Walburga had not sought out comfort in her perfect boy until after Sirius had returned to Hogwarts. 

Regulus’ gratitude had not lasted long. It seemed that Sirius’ blatant disrespect the night of the gala had unleashed an unknown craving in Walburga. For almost the entire month of January, she wouldn’t let Regulus out of her sight. She bathed him, clothed him, petted him, and sat him on her lap like a baby. Regulus hated it, hated her. But whenever she was present, he froze. He only moved at her will and did everything she asked of him. Everything.

Things only changed around the house when the Noble House of Black began to receive weekly dinner guests. It was often Ministry officials, though Lord Voldemort would often come around. The nights Voldemort visited were Regulus’ least favorite. The conversations were always about blood purity, anti-muggle legislation, and not to mention disgusting halfbreeds and mudbloods . Regulus learned to tune most of it out. The only interesting bits were when the Dark Lord discussed his time traveling across Eastern Europe after his days in Hogwarts. He was more than happy to show Regulus photos of where he’d been and discussed all the interesting witches and wizards he had met along the way. 

When Regulus wrote to Pandora, he thought it best to keep out all the times Voldemort visited. Instead, they discussed her progression with her metamorphmagus training, astrology, and magical history. As it turned out, the two shared many common interests, though Pandora was much more invested in divination and magical creatures. Soon, Pandora admitted to not being as anxious about starting Hogwarts. For a while it was strange for Regulus to have a friend who wasn’t Sirius, but he soon found it was quite easy for him to be honest and open with Pandora. It felt as if they’d known each other all their lives.

Both Regulus and Pandora were quite eager for the Easter holiday to approach, for the Burke family had offered to host a small dinner party. In attendance would be both of their immediate families, the Lestrange’s which included Regulus’ cousin Bellatrix, and Lord Voldemort. Though the guest list appealed to neither child, they were excited to see each other in person for the first time since the Christmas gala. 

Sirius returned from Hogwarts the Friday before Easter, extremely unhappy to be back. He moped for quite awhile, admitting to Regulus that he already missed his friends. His one friend, Remus, had been quite sick the night before and Sirius had not seen him on the train back to London. Regulus had expected to be jealous, but to his own surprise he felt bad for his brother. Having discovered friendship for himself, Regulus knew how he’d feel if Pandora became sick and was unable to communicate with him. For perhaps the first time in his life, Regulus felt empathetic towards Sirius.

Due to Sirius’ somber mood, he refrained from causing any havoc around 12 Grimmauld Place. Walburga believed the boy had finally come to his senses and was visibly pleased when she observed her sons reading side by side in the drawing room during the duration of Sirius’ holiday. It was much like the days before he’d gone to Hogwarts. On the night of the Burke’s dinner party, the Black family floo’d to their manor. Fortunately, it was not an extremely formal event, and the boys were able to wear their daily robes, though they were still quite a bit more impressive than the daily robes of other wizarding families. 

The Burke manor stood near the coast of Crackington Haven. A great stone wall wrapped around the property and came up to Regulus’ chin. The house itself was smaller than expected, though still quite nice. There were two large dining rooms, a library, a number of sitting rooms, and eight bedrooms. The halls were wide and lined with portraits, much like Grimmauld Place. It was difficult for Regulus to imagine Pandora growing up in such a dark home, though when your father is a partial owner of one of the creepiest shops Regulus had ever wandered into, it was to be expected. Much like Borgin and Burkes, the manor was full of odd artifacts. Regulus could feel the dark magic beckoning him.

The floo brought them through to the Burke’s main dining room, where they were greeted by their hosts. Not long after, Regulus and Sirius were being shooed out so the adults could talk. They could hear the many locks on the door clasp together before a silencing charm was placed on the room. The boys frowned at each other, confused by their parent’s sudden urgency. Without missing a beat, Pandora came bounding down the hall. Her golden hair flashed a multitude of colors as she threw herself into Regulus’ arms. Beside them, Sirius stood absolutely dumbstruck.

“You didn’t tell me your girlfriend was a metamorphmagus!” 

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Regulus seethed through gritted teeth. 

Pandora blushed, but remained silent.

“Oh boy, when you two get to Hogwarts we're going to have so much fun. You know what kind of pranks we can pull with her?” Sirius was absolutely giddy.

“No, because she won’t be participating in your pranks, Sirius. She has a gift, not a toy.”

“Of course she has a gift! A gift for mischief,” he reached out, as if to stroke the girl’s hair. 

Pandora slapped Sirius’ hand away with immense force.

“Ow! I was only looking,” Sirius rubbed his hand.

“I will not be caught up in your silly games, Sirius Black. My brother tells me all about the things you get up to at school. I will have no part in it,” Pandora huffed, throwing her hair over her shoulder.

Flashing that Sirius Black grin, he turned to Regulus, “I like this one. Well done, Reggie.”

“Prat,” Regulus shoved his brother against the door. 

“ Regulus ,” Pandora’s tone was sharp.

Both boys threw their hands up in surrender. They hadn’t even been there five minutes and they were already fighting. Regulus was not a fighter, whatever had come over him was something he had never felt before. Before they could move on, Prometheus rounded the corner. He was quite tall and bore a similar resemblance to Pandora, though his hair was a bit darker. Dressed far more informally than the other children, Prometheus wore a quidditch jersey and gray sweatpants. He looked far too casual and out of place within the manor. 

“You must be Regulus Black,” Prometheus’ eyes were so dark they were almost black as he looked Regulus up and down, “you’re the one who’s been writing my baby sister the past three months.”

It was acknowledged between all of them that Prometheus did not extend his hand for Regulus to shake. The tension in the air was palpable. Regulus straightened his robes, and decided to be the bigger person.

“Yes, that would be me,” he offered his hand in greeting.

Prometheus’ lip curled while he eyed the younger boy, daring him to make another move. Pandora looked between her brother and her friend and then across to Sirius. Her expression read do something. Sirius only shrugged. He had never had a problem with Prometheus at Hogwarts, in fact they got along pretty well. This new found grudge between him and Regulus was not something Sirius could have foreseen. 

To everyone’s satisfaction, Prometheus reached out and shook Regulus’ hand, grasping it tight, “right, then. Pleasure to meetcha,” a smile formed across the older boy’s face. As a collective, the other three noticeably relaxed.

“Care for some flying?” Prometheus offered.

***

Prometheus was a promising quidditch star. He flew laps around Regulus and Sirius, making their heads spin, and they had practically grown up on brooms. Not being much of a flier herself, Pandora watched the boys from a bench in the garden. The Burke’s had a set of goal posts in their yard, perched at just slightly less than regulation height. Sirius, being slightly larger than Regulus, offered to play keeper. Prometheus played chaser, as he was currently on the back up team for Slytherin. It must have been purely due to his age that he wasn’t on the starting team, as Regulus could tell the boy was gifted. Regulus had always had more of a seeker build, though there was no snitch to chase after. Instead, Regulus flew alongside Prometheus and made very poor attempts at scoring against his brother.   

One after another, Prometheus sent the quaffle sailing through the goal posts. Sirius had actually broken into a sweat. The boys touched back down and dismounted their brooms after Prometheus scored his one hundredth goal. 

“You know Black, you’re not so bad for a Gryffindor,” Prometheus clapped Sirius on the shoulder.

He scoffed in response, “hey mate, I’d appreciate it if you could keep it down. My folks still aren’t too happy about my sorting.” 

“It’s bollocks if you ask me. What do those houses even mean after we’re graduated and long out of there? It can’t really define us forever,” Prometheus threw his broom over his shoulder as the three walked towards Pandora.

“That’s what I’ve been saying for months!” Sirius quickened his pace to walk in step with Prometheus, “but if I’m honest, there’s some right creepy blokes in Slytherin.”

“No shit, you see where I live? I know what kind of stuff goes on in my own house, both here and at Hogwarts. You don’t have to tell me, Black.”

Following close behind the two boys, Regulus listened to their conversation carefully.

“So, what do you get up to in the dungeons?”

“Keep my head down,” there was a slight sadness in the older boy’s tone, “there’s a few of us who don’t want to get mixed up in the blood purity crap. Your cousin, Andy, looked out for us misfits before she left last year.”

“You knew Andy?” Sirius’ eyes lit up.

“She was head girl, bloody brilliant, and she could practically sniff out blood traitors. Myself, the Abbotts, and Professor Slughorn’s nieces, we never really fit in and Andy watched out for us.”

“You never told me about that,” Pandora stood as the boys approached her, “I thought you were getting jinxed every other day.”

“I was, that’s why Andy stepped in. But she’s gone now and it’s way worse than it was. Narcissa just turns a blind eye, she doesn’t want to pick sides.”

“Cissy?” Regulus asked. All eyes turned on him, as if they’d forgotten he was there.

“Yeah, your cousin doesn’t give a dragon’s tail about us outcasts getting attacked in the halls,” Prometheus’ tone came off a bit hostile.

“Narcissa is extremely kind. She wouldn’t let anyone get hurt,” Regulus tried to defend his cousin, but the look on Sirius’ face proved the older boy hadn’t been lying. 

Prometheus snorted, “she’s kind to you, Regulus. You don’t know what she’s like at Hogwarts.”

“You are her favorite, Reggie. Everyone knows it. Just like Andy loves me, that’s how Cissy sees you. But she is a bit of a bitch at school,” Sirius shrugged, as if his cousin letting younger students get bullied was just as normal as professors setting homework.

Sirius turned back towards Pandora and Prometheus, “so if you don’t buy all the blood purity crap, how come your parents haven’t locked you up in the psych ward of St. Mungo’s?”

“Mum’s a Weasley ,” Prometheus said the name like it was a cuss word, “that entire lot is full of blood traitors. Dad, on the other hand, has always seen the darker side of things. For the most part, they agree to disagree.”

“But our grandmother, mum’s mum, is a Greengrass,” Pandora informed them, “seeing as none of us got the Weasley’s hair, you’d never know we share blood. That’s what keeps us safe.”

“Anyone can just look at a book though,” Sirius offered, “there’s family trees of the entire sacred twenty-eight.”

“But they don’t look,” Prometheus shrugged, “people are willing to ignore what they don’t want to see.”

“What they do see is Millicent Burke, with blonde hair and the likeness of a Greengrass. Nobody questions that,” the information poured out of Pandora, happy to finally share the truth with somebody. 

“Dad’s definitely been a bit more strict lately, but it’s not so bad. Since your Christmas party though,” Prometheus pointed between the two brothers, “he’s been going bloody crazy. This Lord Voldemort bloke is a total wanker if you ask me.”

Regulus and Sirius made no comment, but exchanged a questioning look.

“As happy as I am to see you, tonight is going to be horrible,” Pandora confessed.

“Why?” Sirius and Regulus both asked in unison.

“When was the last time you saw your cousin Bellatrix?” Prometheus inquired.

The two boys looked at each other and shrugged. It had been quite awhile.

“Bella’s wedding I guess,” Sirius offered.

Bellatrix’s marriage to Rodolphus Lestrange had been an event both Sirius and Regulus wished they’d forget. The Lestrange family hailed from France, so the ceremony had been held in Paris. It was the boy’s first time out of the country and they had been quite excited to explore their new surroundings. Unfortunately, they had been confined to the Lestrange manor which was far darker than the Black or Burke home combined. Regulus had been convinced they were keeping a dragon in their cellar and vampires in their private orchard. Their entire property felt like a graveyard; so dark and cold. To host a wedding ceremony there felt quite silly, it seemed a far better venue for a funeral. The statues, gargoyles, and paintings kept an alarmingly close eye on the guests, the house elves wore chains around their necks, and the flowers upon the tables had probably been dead for weeks. Bella had been very eager to marry Rodolphus, though Andromeda and Narcissa were both a little less enthusiastic for their older sister. It was the last place anyone wanted to be.

Regulus shook the image from his mind, as Pandora continued to explain. The four children were now headed back through the halls of the Burke manor, hungry for dinner.

“Your cousin Bella is a bit peculiar, I will admit,” Pandora’s voice echoed slightly in the high ceiling halls. 

“She’s a nutter,” Prometheus mumbled and Sirius snorted in agreement.

Regulus was a bit annoyed. 

“Rodolphus on the other hand is much more subdued than Bellatrix, though he is quite scary,” Pandora shivered, “he’s been over a lot lately, comes into the store almost every week.”

“How come?” Sirius questioned.

“He’s been looking for some old heirlooms, possibly of the founders,” Pandora shrugged, “I don’t ask any questions though. Father says it’s not my place.”

“Founders?” Regulus asked.

“The Hogwarts founders, something that may have been of value to them.” 

Before Regulus could respond, Sirius continued, “what does he need the founder's heirlooms for? The Lestrange vault doesn’t have enough of that stuff?” 

Pandora just shrugged as they made their way back into the dining hall.

The door had been opened since they were out flying. Already seated around the long mahogany table were Walburga, Orion, Millicent and Bacchus Burke, Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Rodolphus’ father Silas, and the Dark Lord himself. They were a depressing group to behold. 

Prometheus has left his broom by the door and instructed the other boys to do the same. Regulus found this to be a bit rude and undignified. He chose to leave his broom outside of the dining room. The fact that Prometheus hadn’t even changed into something more suitable for dinner made Regulus a bit annoyed. Ultimately, it was not his home. He chose not to comment on the issue.

The four children quietly took their seats across from one another, but beside their parents. Walburga turned her nose up at the Burke boy, wearing his quidditch jersey and looking quite out of place. She turned to her own boys, sniffing the air and noticing a hint of sweat and wood. Her lips curled slightly, though she didn’t say a word. 

Once situated, Regulus turned his eyes up to meet Pandora who was sitting directly across from him. He could see her hands clasped together tightly, her knuckles turning a bit white. She was trying to control her powers. He could tell she was struggling as her eyes darted between her plate and the Dark Lord. Unlike Regulus, Pandora had not grown used to Lord Voldemort’s presence in her own home. 

Bacchus stood, his chair scratched against the tiled floors, and raised his crystal chalice into their air. The rest of the adults did the same, though Lord Voldemort remained seated at the head of the table.

“To the wizarding world and those who remain the purest within it. To the next generation of witches and wizards,” he nodded towards the four children, “may they grow to meet their fullest potential and make us proud. And to Lord Voldemort; may he continue to carry out the most ancient and sacred work of those wizards and witches who came before us. Potentia, pudicitia, et immortalitas. ”

Everyone, aside from Sirius, Regulus, Pandora, and Prometheus, raised their glasses and chanted together, “potentia, pudicitia, et immortalitas.”

Chapter Text

Not much was said over the clinking of glasses and the scraping of utensils across the fine china plates. Whatever the group had gathered for had been taken care of before the children returned from the garden. Why Regulus and Sirius had to be there at all was a bit of a mystery to them both. The only thing Regulus could think about during the meal was Baccus’ comment about them reaching their potential and making them proud. There were plenty of other pureblood children in Britain, so why were the Blacks and the Burkes so important? Regulus wondered why the Dark Lord was so interested in them personally. 

As the meal came to a close, Lord Voldemort stood from the table. The others did as well. The four children looked at each other before also standing, clearly confused and uncomfortable. Bellatrix practically tripped over herself in a hurry to reach Voldemort before the others. She kissed his rings as he made his way around the table. He suddenly seemed eager to leave, as he rushed through good byes and thanks to his gracious hosts. Then he came to the end of the table, with seven adults to his back and four children before him. Regulus looked past the man’s robes to see his mother on the arm of Orion, both their expressions hard and calculating as they watched their young heirs. Bella’s nose twitched and she twirled her wand in her hand, a noticeable gap between her and Rodolphus, who stood silently in her shadow. The room was silent as the witches and wizards waited to see what the Dark Lord had for their children. 

From his pocket, Lord Voldemort pulled out a small leather drawstring pouch. He poured out its content into the palm of his hand, a small hill of black coins glistened in the eery candlelight of the Burke’s dining room. He then placed one coin into the palm of each child’s hand. Sirius was the last to receive a coin; his curiosity kept the usually mouthy boy silent. Regulus turned the coin over in his hand. Engraved on one side was a skull with a snake pouring from his mouth. On the other side read the words spoken earlier in the evening; potentia, pudicitia, et immortalitas. 

“Let these coins be a reminder of what we gather for, what our mission is,” Voldemort spoke softly, though his words commanded attention, “you are the future and the key to our survival.”

Regulus glanced at Pandora from the corner of his eye, but she was looking, beyond the Dark Lord, at her mother. Beside Pandora, Prometheus stood tall, looking directly into the face of the man before them. Sirius simply pocketed the coin without looking at it. After surveying the others, Regulus returned his gaze to his own coin. He then felt a strong hand on his shoulder. He looked up to find the Dark Lord smirking down at him.

“Ah, young Regulus,” his grip tightened, “do not misplace it.”

Without another word, Lord Voldemort stepped around the boy and into the floo. In a flash of green, he was gone.

***

May 22, 1972

Very few mornings went by that Spring where it wasn’t raining. Regulus woke to a large brown owl tapping on his bedroom window, drenched by the downpour outside. He scrambled out from under the covers and hastily threw open the window. A gust of cold air filled the room as the bird hopped in and shook out its feathers. In its beak was a cream colored envelope, kept magically dry from the rain. 

It had finally arrived. Of course Regulus knew that it would come, but for a moment it didn’t feel real. He took the envelope from the owl’s beak and the bird flew out the window in an instant. Breaking the red wax seal, Regulus tore the letter from the envelope. Rain swept into his room through the open window. The boy stood in a growing puddle as he read through his letter. 

Dear Mr. Black,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. 

Term begins on 1 September. We await your owl by no later than 31 July. 

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

It took another gust of wind to snap Regulus out of his daze and he hastily closed the window. Retrieving a towel from his hamper, he threw it over the puddle on the floor and then ran down the stairs. Still in his pajamas, letter in hand, Regulus took the stairs two at a time. Down in the kitchen he found Orion and Walburga sitting at opposite ends of the table, sipping their tea, while Kreacher dished out eggs from a frying pan. Walburga looked up as her son entered the room and almost choked at the sight of him dripping wet with the most giddy look in his eyes.

“It came!” Regulus announced with glee.

“Keep your voice down, boy. This is a kitchen, not a quidditch match,” Orion grumbled, his eyes never wandering from the day’s issue of the Daily Prophet. 

Regulus frowned slightly before turning to his mother. In a more subdued tone, he repeated, “it came. My Hogwarts letter just arrived.”

Walburga looked from her son to the parchment clutched in his hand. She thought back to when Sirius had received his letter, thrilled that his acceptance had been solidified, that he’d actually be going. However, looking at her perfect boy, she was angry with the truth that she’d one day soon have to let him go. 

“Well of course it came,” she snatched up the letter, “you’re eleven now, are you not?”

Regulus watched his mother as she scanned over the list of needed materials. 

“We’ll wait until it’s closer to the start of term to get everything,” Regulus’ face fell slightly, “but as it is your birthday, I think a trip to Diagon Alley for your wand and perhaps a familiar, is in order.” 

“Really? Oh, thank you mother,” Regulus threw himself into Walburga’s arms. He was not the affectionate type, though the feeling had suddenly come over him. Walburga held the boy tight, her cheek nestled in his curling mane which had grown out past his chin. After a moment, Walburga pulled away and tilted the boy’s face up to look at her. 

“Go get dressed and then come straight back down. We’ll floo over to Borgin and Burkes,” Walburga patted Regulus on the cheek and sent him on his way.

Back in his room, Regulus quickly changed into black trousers, a light weight blue sweater, and black robes which were charmed to repel the rain. As he came back down the stairs, he heard shouting from the kitchen. The boy pressed his body against the wall, the portraits all turned their noses up at his eavesdropping. 

“You coddle the boy, Walburga,” Orion bellowed, “Voldemort will not want him if he’s soft.”

“He is a boy , Orion. My perfect boy. In time, he will grow into exactly what the Dark Lord requires.”

“Not if you continue to treat him like an infant.”

“As if you have any idea how he should be treated, you hardly speak to the boy. It’s a wonder Sirius turned out the way he has.”

There was a loud crack as Orion’s palm collided with Walburga’s face. Regulus flinched at the sound, his eyes slightly glazed over as he held back his tears.

“ You raised them, Walburga. If you have any issue with how Sirius has turned out, perhaps you should blame yourself. It was always my desire to have good, strong sons. I live to be an example for them. I work, I provide, I give them perspective, something to strive for.”

“You ignore them!” Walburga protested.

“Well at least I don’t defile them,” Orion spat, “ crucio .” 

Walburga let out a deafening wail and her body crashed to the floor. Still holding back his tears, Regulus sniffled as he listened to the sounds of his mother being tortured. He couldn’t bring himself to enter the kitchen, to yell at his father to stop. A moment which felt like an eternity passed and Orion emerged from the kitchen. He passed by Regulus without even seeing him and disapparated half way down the hall. 

Regulus scrambled to his feet and ran into the kitchen. Walburga was curled up on the floor, crying quietly. She flinched at Regulus’ touch. Kreacher shuffled over with a vial of some liquid Regulus didn’t recognize. Walburga reached out a shaky hand and poured the vials contents down her throat. The potion washed over her in an instant, calming her muscles and retracting her tears. She opened her bloodshot eyes and found her son staring back at her. 

“Oh, my perfect boy,” Walburga sighed and leaned back on her elbows, “I guess your father was right, I can’t keep everything from you.”

“Why- why would he do that?” A few tears rolled down Regulus’ face.

“Because he loves us, Regulus. He wants you and Sirius to be strong and I’ve failed him. Wipe away those tears, boy. Strong wizards do not cry.”

Regulus used the sleeves of his robes to wipe his wet cheeks. He looked up at the ceiling, forcing the remaining tears to retreat. Then he stood and helped his mother to her feet.

“You haven’t failed, mum. I’m strong, and- and I’ll prove it. When I get to Hogwarts I’ll be the smartest, the most well trained wizard the school has ever seen. I’ll be whatever you need,” Regulus sniffed once more before adding, “I’ll be whatever Lord Voldemort requires me to be.”

A genuine smile formed on Walburga lips, “I know, Regulus. I know you will be.”

***

Once inside Borgin and Burkes, Regulus was a bit sad to not see Pandora milling about the store. Rather, Caractacus Burke, Baccus’ father, was sitting behind the counter alongside Titus Borgin. The two old men looked mean and tired; their beards were long and white, the hair upon their heads thinning. Regulus tried to avert his eyes from the various dark objects which cluttered the shelves. Why his mother always chose to floo to that shop in particular was unknown to Regulus. He despised Knockturn Alley and the looks he’d receive from the wayward Witches and Wizards who hid in the shadows. Regulus thought them dirtier than most muggles if he were being honest. 

Eventually, Walburga and Regulus emerged from the shadows and out into Diagon Alley. For being a Monday in May and the weather quite dreary, there were few people on the street. Of course, Regulus had gone on countless trips with his family to Diagon Alley over the years. Though never before had those trips been for him. As they approached Ollivander’s wand shop, Regulus held his breath. Inside the dimly lit store, stood towering shelves of wand boxes. A man in his sixties poked his head out from behind a large shelf. Regulus knew him to be Garrick Ollivander, a most esteemed wand maker.

“Is it time already?” the man spoke in a low and raspy voice.

“Good morning, Garrick,” Walburga offered a polite but insincere smile, “this is my boy, Regulus.”

Walburga pushed her son forward just slightly, his feet moved though his mind had not yet commanded them to. 

“So it would seem,” Ollivander fully emerged from behind the shelf, taking a box from high above his head without taking his eyes off the boy. He removed the wand from its deep crimson box and held it out for Regulus to take, “the youngest of the Noble House of Black has finally come of age.”

“Give it a good swish, Regulus,” Walburga instructed.

The wand was dainty, an almost flesh colored wood. It felt too light in his palm. Regulus lifted his hand only slightly, sending the books on the countertop flying across the room. Ollivander quickly replaced it with a heavier wand, curved at the end and much longer than the first. Its grip was rough and uncomfortable. Regulus gave it a flick, but the lights only flickered slightly. He frowned, worried his magic was not strong enough. Then Ollivander presented a wand of ebony. It was straight as a needle with a sturdy grip, the tip of the wand came to a bit of a point. Regulus raised the wand in front of his face and as he did so the lights in the shop grew blindingly bright. He felt a knot form in his stomach, and his hand grew heavy with the weight of the wand. Suddenly he knew. He’d found his wand.

“How interesting,” Ollivander mused, “ebony wood with a Thestral tail hair core, 11 inches and fairly bendy. You’ve got yourself quite a unique wand, young Regulus.” 

“Thestral tail hair?” Walburga interrupted from the seat she’d taken by the door, “that’s not one of the supreme core types, Garrick.”

Mr. Ollivander threw up his hands and shrugged, “the wand chooses the wizard, Mrs. Black. As you well know.”

Worried he had messed up somehow, Regulus looked from his mother to Garrick, “is Thestral hair bad?” 

The old man smiled down at the boy, “there is no such thing as a bad wand core, Mr. Black. Thestral hair is known to be a bit unstable, though it is exceedingly rare. Tell me, Regulus, are you familiar with Thestrals?”

Regulus shook his head.

“Thestrals can only be seen by those who have seen death. They are a type of winged horse, and some consider them to be a bit dangerous. However, my experiences with Thestrals have been quite rewarding. See, most witches and wizards are scared of Thestrals, but the beasts are simply misunderstood.”

“You’ve seen death?” Regulus inquired.

“Indeed I have. Though when you reach such an old age as I, you’re bound to witness death at least once.”

“And my wand chose me?” Regulus turned the ebony wand between his fingers, examining the smoothness of it. 

“Yes, it has. I believe you will do extraordinary things with that wand. Remember, death is not something to fear, boy.”

Walburga cleared her throat, unhappy with the turn of the conversation. A Thestral gave its hair for my wand. Regulus pondered the thought, unsure about the creature he was unable to see, but yet owed much of his magical ability to. He wondered if he’d ever be able to see a Thestral one day.

“Seven Galleons, is that right?” Walburga reached into her handbag, eager to leave the shop. She then turned to Regulus, who was still standing in the middle of the floor, gaping at his newly acquired instrument, “put it away now, Regulus. There’s a small pocket for it on the inside of your robes.”

It was strange to fill the small space within the right side of his robes. He could feel the weight of his wand against his hip as they continued their outing through Diagon Alley. The rain had stopped, yet the clouds still cast a gray shadow over London.

“What would you like, Regulus? An owl, a toad, or a cat? It’s quite silly the animals they allow you to have. In my day there was a mudblood girl who’d brought an iguana, it was such an ugly creature,” Walburga laughed to herself, “the reptile, I mean. Though, as you can imagine the mudblood wasn’t much to look at either.”

The two stopped in front of the Owl Emporium, as Regulus peered through the windows. Regulus never held a fondness for the birds. Of course the Black family had quite a few of their own owls, and Regulus knew that Hogwarts kept a variety of owls for students who didn’t have their own. In all fairness, Regulus didn’t truly need his own bird. He turned from the storefront and looked up and down the street, his eyes settling on the sign for Magical Menagerie. He began walking towards the shop; having never gone in there before, he had very little expectations. Walburga followed close behind, still going on about the iguana. 

Behind the shop’s door was a wild collection of magical creatures. Even though the shop was empty of customers, it was quite noisy. Walburga held her nose as she crossed over the threshold. The air was a bit pungent, but Regulus didn’t mind. There were cages and tanks piled high upon shelves, filled with various birds and owls, reptiles, rats, Puffskeins, rabbits, toads, Kneazles, cats, and dogs. It was like a miniature zoo. 

As the bell chimed, announcing their entrance, the voice of a young girl called from the back, “be out in just a moment!”

As Regulus began to observe the animals, he heard the approaching footsteps of the girl and then a loud crash as glass and water sprayed across the floor. Startled, Regulus looked up to find that the shopkeeper was quite pretty, her long brown hair was tied in a high ponytail, her brown robes were covered in feathers and hairs. She seemed to have dropped a tank filled with water, as her hands were still stretched out in front of her. Regulus studied the girl's face, which was in a state of terror and shock as she stared across the counter at Walburga. And then it hit him. 

“Andromeda.” Regulus and Walburga both said at once. 

She stammered before pulling out her wand and muttering “ reparo ,” the glass tank and its contents flew back into her hands and then she set it on the counter. 

“Walburga,” she nodded at the witch and then turned to Regulus and smiled kindly, “hello, Regulus.”

“Do not speak to my son, you disgraceful blood traitor,” Walburga turned to her son, “we’re leaving.”

“Mother, you promised me a familiar,” Regulus pouted and clasped his hands together, “please?”

Walburga looked from her son to her disgraced niece and her lip twitched, “be quick.”

Regulus spun around, eager to find the perfect companion. He knew he wouldn’t like a toad, so he had to be going home with a cat. As he searched he couldn’t help overhearing Walburga’s degrading voice.

“Working at this putrid shop, Andromeda? It does suit you.” 

“Actually, it’s just temporary. I begin working for Gringotts at the end of the month,” Regulus could hear the pride in her voice and couldn’t help but smirk. 

Evidently, even Walburga couldn’t find something horrid to say about that. It had been only a few months since Andromeda had announced her engagement to the muggle born, Ted Tonks. They were set to wed that coming August. Walburga was furious with the news and had written to Sirius, demanding that he end all communication with his favorite cousin. Regulus wondered if Sirius knew Andromeda had been working at Magical Menagerie, or if he knew about her starting at Gringotts. He was suddenly lost in thought about what his brother might be up to at that very moment.

“Regulus!” The hiss of his mother’s tone broke his train of thought and he began his search once again. 

 “Can I help you find something, Regulus?” Andromeda put her hands on her knees, bending slightly to be eye level with the boy. Her smile was warm and she had the same light gray eyes as him, the same eyes as all the Blacks. 

“I’m looking for a cat,” he informed his cousin.

She crinkled her freckled nose and smiled playfully, “I think I have just the one.”

Andromeda retreated behind some shelves, and Walburga sighed loudly, announcing her impatience. She then returned with the smallest kitten Regulus had ever seen. It was all black, aside from its face which was split half white down the middle. On the black side, the cat had one green eye and on the white side was one gold eye. It was beautiful. Andromeda gently placed the kitten in Regulus’ extended arms.

“Is it a boy or a girl?” he asked.

“A girl.”

He took a moment to ponder a name, “I think I’ll call her Karasi.”

“That is a brilliant name,” Andromeda tousled Regulus’ curls. 

Walburga cleared her throat, yet again making her presence known, “how much for the cat?”

As Andromeda shifted her gaze, her eyes grew cold and her smile faded, “ten galleons.”

Throwing the coins on the counter, she hastily turned and grabbed her son by the collar. Before they were out the door, Regulus turned to catch one more look at his cousin. He smiled over his shoulder, “thank you, Andy!”

“Happy birthday, Reggie. Say hi to your brother for me, yeah?”

Before Regulus could respond, the door to the shop had slammed behind them.

***

That entire day at 12 Grimmauld Place, Regulus kept to his bedroom. He teased Karasi with feathers from the owls for hours. In the early afternoon, a familiar owl pecked at his window, it carried a small package. Regulus pulled at the twine, eager to examine its contents. He was pleased to find that Sirius hadn’t forgotten his birthday. In fact, his brother had sent him a chocolate frog along with a letter. 

Dear Reggie,

Bet you thought I forgot your big day, didn’t you? As your older brother, it is my job to make you think I’d forget something like that. The lateness of this letter has nothing to do with the fact I had an exam today in charms, which I had completely forgotten about. No, it definitely wasn’t that. Enjoy the chocolate frog. I definitely didn’t have Remus sneak into Honeydukes to get it for me. 

Things here have gotten a bit weird. I don’t know if you’ve been in touch with your girlfriend lately, but her brother’s been giving me the cold shoulder. I really thought we hit it off on Easter, but it seems Prometheus is no longer interested in being friends. I haven’t even been pulling pranks! Trust me, you would have heard about it if I was. I told James to leave me out for a bit, as I abide by our agreement. He understands that the spit shake is almost as unbreakable as an actual unbreakable vow. 

I hope mum lets you write back, I miss our little chats. Let me know what’s been going on, Cissy wont tell me a thing. (She acts like she doesn’t even know me half the time.)

Much love, little brother.

-S

Dear Sirius,

Thank you for the chocolate frog, it was very thoughtful of you. I haven’t heard from Pandora in a few days, now that I think about it. She is not my girlfriend, though. Mum took me to Diagon Alley today to get my wand. It’s ebony with Thestral tail hair - can you believe that? Mum also let me pick out a familiar and you wouldn’t believe who I saw. Andromeda has been working at Magical Menagerie! She picked out the most perfect cat for me, I named her Karasi. I can’t wait for you to meet her when you come home. Andy says hello, by the way. Mum wasn’t very nice to her at the shop, though.

Mum and dad were fighting today. Fighting about us actually. Dad says mum failed at raising us, that we’re too soft. Sirius, he crucio’d her. It was horrible. Mum told me not to cry, that strong wizards don’t do that. Sometimes I get scared and it just happens. I don’t mean to burden you with all this, but I have to tell someone. It’s hard with you not around. I miss you, Sirius. 

Only a few more weeks until you’re back home!

Love,

R.A.B.

Days turned into weeks as Regulus waited to hear from both Sirius and Pandora. The walls of Grimmauld Place were closing in on him as he remained mostly in his room, fighting back tears, with only Karasi to keep him company. Since his birthday, Walburga visited Regulus on multiple occasions, typically moments after he heard her and Orion fighting. She’d tiptoe into his room, teary eyed and bruised. Regulus only wanted to comfort his mother, to make her pain go away. Whether or not he willingly chose to, he obeyed her every wish. Regulus took care of Walburga and she always left happy and satisfied, so full of love for her perfect boy. Once the door was closed behind her, Regulus curled into a ball on his bed and dreamt of the day he’d leave her forever.

Chapter Text

June 16, 1972

The Hogwarts Express slowed as it pulled into the station. The whistle blew as the train's brakes locked. Students began to shuffle out through the thin sliding doors. Many of them without their robes, instead dressed for the Summer holiday. Soon, came Sirius bounding down the steps, flanked by the three boys Regulus recognized from December. That same pang of jealousy pulled at Regulus' stomach as he watched the boys say goodbye to each other. What was so good about them that made Sirius refuse to write back? Regulus watched as Sirius turned on his heel, trunk and owl in tow. He spotted Regulus through the crowd and came bounding across the platform with that signature grin plastered across his face. Regulus was not so keen to return the emotion.

“Reggie!” Sirius raised his arms to grasp his brother. Regulus just stood there, stiff as a board.

“Sirius,” Regulus mumbled, his brow furrowed. 

The older boy pulled back from his brother, giving him a sad and questioning look. Before the two could converse further, Walburga put a hand on each of her son’s shoulders. 

“Alright boys, let’s go home shall we?”

***

Back at Grimmauld Place, Regulus retreated to his room without saying a word to Sirius. Dumfounded, Sirius only watched as his brother bounded up the stairs and slammed the door shut behind him. Sirius dragged his trunk up to his room and returned his owl to the home’s small owlery in the attic. 

Meanwhile, Regulus lounged across his bed, stroking Karasi’s back as she purred loudly. How was he to last an entire summer, with resentment building for Sirius and Walburga, but also so much excitement for his first term at Hogwarts? With a groan, he rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. It was so strange to be so angry, yet so hopeful at the same time. He could feel his muscles tightening with frustration, unable to properly express what was going on inside him.  There was a knock at the door.

“Go away!” Regulus shouted.

Sirius let himself in, “you’re being a prat,” he threw himself on Regulus’ bed.

“You didn’t write,” Regulus smacked his brother with a pillow.

“How did you expect me to respond? You unloaded quite a bit of information, Reg. Didn’t think it was something I could address in a letter.”

“You could have said that .”

“I was busy!” Sirius got to his feet, bouncing slightly on the mattress, “school isn’t all just fun and games, you know.”

“Don’t jump on the bed, Sirius. You’ll hurt the cat,” Karasi had been curled up at the edge of the bed, watching Sirius with careful eyes.

Sirius flopped down on his belly, causing Karasi to stand up and hiss before jumping off the bed.

“So tell me about it now, Reg. What happened?,” Sirius perched himself up on his elbows and looked at his brother sincerely. 

Regulus closed his eyes and sighed, not really wanting to relive that moment, but also unable to ignore Sirius. He rolled onto his side, his head on his arm.

“Mum told me to get dressed to go to Diagon Alley, when I came down the stairs I heard them fighting. Dad said mum coddled me, that I’m soft, that Voldemort won’t want me if I’m soft.”

“ Voldemort? What’s he got to do with it, what’s he want with you?” Sirius sounded absolutely disgusted.

“I don’t know, Sirius, but it’s not about that. Anyway, mum blamed dad for not spending enough time with us and that’s why you’re- why you’re you. ”

“What’s that mean?” Sirius scoffed.

Regulus waved his hand, “why you act out. Anyway , they said some more things and then he crucio ’d her. Sirius, he used an unforgivable.”

“Doubt it was the first time, Reg.”

Sirius’ tone hurt. How could he be so sure their father could be so cruel? He didn’t seem bothered at all. Regulus’ disgust and confusion was plastered across his face. 

Sirius sighed, “Look, mate, when you’re beat up as much as I am, you start to expect things like this.”

Regulus studied his brother, his eyes were sad, though he tried to mask it. The gears started turning and Regulus recognized a startling truth, “they’ve used it on you, haven’t they?”

“Father did. Just once, after Christmas. I’d expected it from Walburga, if I’m being honest, but she just watched.”

“Are you okay, Sirius?”

His brother smiled back at him, “never better, now that I’m back here with you.”

***

August 28, 1972

That was the last good summer. Though Pandora hadn’t returned any of Regulus’ letters, he chose to distract himself. Those summer months were full of flying, reading, piano lessons, trips to France, Italy, and Romania, swimming in lakes, and staying up late to tell ghost stories. Regulus was shocked to find Sirius on his best behavior, Walburga had hardly punished the boy. Meaning, she had no reason to seek out Regulus. There were several nights where Orion and Walburga left without their children, to attend one dinner party or another. For almost three whole months the Dark Lord was just a figment of their imagination. 

During the last week of August, Walburga took her sons to Diagon Alley to complete their back to school shopping. Witches and wizards crowded the alley, children scurried about, ducking under arms and in between legs. The shops which lined the alley seemed almost piled upon one another, thrown together in misshapen ways and colors. Wacky signs protruded from the door frames, various flags and banners hung from the second story windows. Since Regulus’ last visit, things had definitely livened up. The cobblestone beneath his feet was old, worn, and rigid from years of foot traffic. Regulus was overwhelmed by the sounds and smells around him. There were merchants shouting their sales into the crowd, birds squawking from their cages, and music coming from somewhere Regulus couldn’t make out. The air smelled sweet but also smokey, and there was something that just seemed old about the atmosphere, like mothballs. It was like waking up in a dream for Regulus; everything was new and bright, but all too familiar.

Their first stop was Flourish and Blotts for their school books. Regulus was very proud to have read most of the assigned reading already and had his own copies at home. The only two he was missing were One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore and The Standard Book of Spells by Miranda Goshawk. The only book Sirius needed was his grade II level book of spells, as most of the first year readings continued on into their second year. Even with the crowds, they were making great time as they entered Potage’s Cauldron Shop. All Regulus needed was a standard size two pewter cauldron, and there was an entire display of them right in the middle of the shop, as all first years were required to have one. Regulus reached for a cauldron from the towering display, when he suddenly caught a glimpse of golden hair from the other side of the mound. Momentarily distracted, Regulus picked up the wrong cauldron and sent a rain of the metal basins to the ground. The sound of it seemed to go on forever. Regulus’ cheeks burned as his eyes met the blue ones across from him. After almost six months, Pandora Burke stood directly across from him. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could do so the cauldrons were suddenly being piled up again, blocking his view. He turned to find Walburga swishing her wand, as the shopkeeper hurried over. 

“What is going on here?” the stout middle aged wizard demanded.

“Just a little accident, Potage. No harm, no foul,” Walburga spoke with her chin up.

The man huffed, examined the display, and went back to the counter. Regulus scurried around the display, where he found Pandora wide eyed, clutching her own cauldron to her chest.

“Regulus, how-how are you?” she stammered.

“Why haven’t you written?” Regulus’ voice was low, his eyes wandered over the girl’s face. She looked tired.

“I- it’s complicated, Regulus,” Pandora couldn’t meet his eyes. 

“Uncomplicate it for me,” he sounded desperate as he took a step closer toward his friend.

“It’s not like I didn’t want to, you have to believe me. I just wasn’t allowed. Things at home have been hard,” her eyes were downcast and she tucked a strand of fading blue hair behind her ear. 

“I know, which is why I could have used a friend all these months,” Regulus was getting angry, though he tried not to show it. If anyone knew about a hard homelife, it was him. Even he still managed to write.

Pandora looked up at him, her hair morphing from a light blue shade to a very dark blue, “I am sorry, Regulus. I can’t explain it now. When we get to Hogwarts I can tell you everything,” she reached out a hand, gently touching Regulus’. To his surprise, he didn’t recoil.

“It’s been really really hard, Pandora. Unbelievably hard. I thought I had done something to make you mad at me. I was so worried I’d done something,” he tried hard to fight back the tears inching to the surface. 

From blue, her hair changed into a lovely light pink, just like when they first met, “you didn’t do a thing, I promise. I will explain, but I have to go now.”

Pandora quickly pecked Regulus on the cheek, and turned to pay the man at the counter. He could feel his face grow hot as he watched his friend exit the shop and disappear into the alley. Suddenly, there was a hand on his shoulder. Regulus jumped, sending his cauldron to the floor with a deafening crash. He scrambled to pick it up while Sirius laughed at his brother’s misfortune.

“She is totally your girlfriend,” Sirius clutched his sides.

“She is not! Leave me alone, Sirius,” he shoved his brother as he walked by, heading for Walburga.

“I already paid for the cauldron, let’s move along now,” Walburga ushered Regulus out the door as Sirius followed them both.

Once back into the alley, Sirius ran past Regulus and collided with another boy. Both of them were grinning ear to ear. Regulus felt his chest tighten at the sight. Then Sirius led the boy over.

“Reggie, I’d like you to meet James Potter. He’s my best mate,” there was a mischievous gleam in Sirius’ eyes as he spoke, looking proudly between his brother and his friend.

James put out his hand. His round rimmed glasses were slightly askew, his hair was a mess, and he seemed to have a bit of sauce stuck in the corner of his mouth. Part of Regulus wanted to believe it was a joke, though he’d known Potter was friendly with his brother. He hesitantly brought his hand up to properly greet the boy, but Walburga sharply swatted it away. Pulling back, Regulus winced at the sudden sting. The grins melted away from Sirius’ and James’ faces.

Walburga looked directly at Regulus and spoke only to him, “we do not shake hands with blood traitors, Regulus. You might as well be touching a mudblood.”

James looked absolutely petrified at Walburga’s words, “I’m sorry, ma’am. I didn’t mean to-”

Walburga whipped around, “do not speak to me, child.”

In an instant, Walburga had a hand on both of her boys and apparated back to Grimmauld Place. The inky darkness engulfed Regulus, he felt his lungs contract as he tried to breathe. It was almost like drowning. They landed in the foyer, both Sirius and Regulus fell to the floor, gasping for air. Then Sirius started screaming. 

Regulus looked over to see that Sirius’ left leg was torn from his ankle up to his knee. Blood poured from the cut, it wound around his limb like a ribbon. Shocked with fear, Regulus was stuck to the floor on his hands and knees, unable to look away. Walburga calmly walked away and after what felt like an eternity, she returned with a small bottle.

“Essence of Dittany,” Walburga spoke calmly, not at all outwardly concerned over Sirius’ crying or his injury, “this will sting.”

Drops of the solution were spread across the torn flesh and sizzled on contact. Sirius groaned as he fought the pain. The skin began to pull itself together and the smoking stopped. Lying on his back, Sirius gasped for air. Sweat stuck to his skin, his lost blood pooled on the floor around him. Regulus had never apparated before, let alone seen someone get splinched. To see his brother lying on the floor in his own blood was too much for him. Still on his hands and knees, Regulus vomited into his brand new cauldron.

Chapter Text

A clumsy laugh fumbled from Sirius’ lips as he laid there on his back, watching his brother. In the face of trauma, Sirius could only laugh. Humor was the best medicine, after all. Regulus did not agree. He gave his older brother glare, his eyebrows slightly raised, as he leaned over his cauldron. This only made Sirius laugh harder. 

“You should see the look on your face,” Sirius giggled.

“You almost died ,” Regulus threw himself on top of his brother, hitting him multiple times across the chest.

Sirius continued to laugh at Regulus’ failed attempts to hurt him. Walburga pried Regulus off by the back of his robes, still kicking and throwing his arms wildly. 

“Why are you laughing, huh? You think it’s funny to be bleeding all over the place?” Regulus yelled while Walburga continued to hold him back.

“He’s fine, dear. Calm down,” Walburga spoke, sounding slightly annoyed. 

Suddenly, Regulus was reminded of how they ended up there in the first place. He spun around to face his mother, “why’d you apparate us? He could have died! What if I got splinched, too?”

“You will keep your voice down, Regulus. Do not speak to me that way. It was simply an accident, it happens sometimes,” she turned to Sirius, “you’re fine, yes?”

Sirius nodded.

“See, good as new. Perhaps next time we will not fraternize with blood traitors,” Walburga turned and began to walk down the hall.

But Regulus wasn’t done, “we couldn’t have just walked away, though? We’ve never apparated before. That was horrible, mum!” 

In a flash, Walburga had turned and smacked Regulus across the face. As she did so, her eyes grew wide in realization of what she had done. She dropped to her knees, before her child. Regulus stood there in shock, with his hand pressed against his face. He could feel the tears coming.

“Oh my perfect boy,” Walburga reached out, but Regulus backed away.

Sirius was on his feet now, hobbling slightly, “you hit him! You never hit him.”

Regulus had never been struck by Walburga before. In his eleven years, that was a first. He never understood how Sirius dealt with it, how he could get beaten and cursed almost daily. The humiliation and pain of it all was unbearable. Finally, he knew how it felt. 

“Mother, I didn’t mean to make you angry, I’m sorry,” the words rushed from Regulus’ mouth without a second thought.

“You’re apologizing?” Sirius gaped at his brother, “you didn’t do anything wrong!”

Sirius’ words snapped Walburga out of her daze. She stood, now towering over her sons. Walburga was fairly tall for a woman, her features sharp, and her eyes were constantly wide and ablaze. To a child, she was a beautiful, haunting, giant. 

“Enough!” she bellowed, her demeanor becoming a bit unhinged. A strand of hair had been untucked from the bun atop her head; she looked disheveled. Startled by the realization, Regulus thought she looked a bit like Bella.

“I will not be spoken back to! I will not have my children muck about with blood traitors and mudbloods! And I certainly will not have any disobedience from either of you! Am I understood?” The gray of Walburga’s eyes had turned nearly black as she screamed, her voice bouncing off the walls. 

The boys nodded.

Brushing the hair from her face, Walburga straightened herself out and called for Kreacher. With a crack, the elf appeared. 

“Mop this up, Kreacher. Clean out the cauldron as well.”

“Yes, Mistress,” Kreacher bowed and as he turned towards the mess, giving both boys a disapproving look, “Kreacher lives to serve the noble house of Black.”

Though Kreacher spoke those words hundreds, if not thousands of times before, he seemed to be saying them directly to Sirius and Regulus, as if reminding them where their loyalties should lie. Walburga was already halfway to the kitchen before either brother moved. Hurriedly, Regulus began the assent to his room. As he climbed the stairs, his hand still pressed against his cheek, Sirius caught him by the arm.

“Why’d you apologize? She hit you. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Sirius attempted to reason with his brother.

“I raised my voice. I spoke back to her,” Regulus shrugged, “this is my punishment.”

“Don’t you see how wrong that is? That’s not normal, Reggie.”

“She does it all the time to you.”

Sirius was slightly taken aback by his brother’s bluntness, “that doesn’t make it normal. Other kids don’t get hit like I do.”

“Well, other kids must follow their parents’ rules,” Regulus continued up the stairs.

“That’s not the point, Reg!” Sirius struggled to follow his brother’s pace, as his leg was still regaining strength, “she shouldn’t hit me and she certainly shouldn’t have hit you.”

“I don’t want to make mother angry,” Regulus sniffled.

Though he realized getting smacked across the face was actually preferable to the alternative. His stomach flipped and his heart began to race. What is she going to do to me now that I’ve acted out? Regulus thought in a panic. Sirius’ actions often caused Walburga to seek Regulus out, it was possible having hurt her youngest son would make her feel the need to right that wrong. What she could do to Regulus after she felt guilty for smacking him could be far worse than anything she had done before. Regulus began to feel sick yet again.

Bolting to the bathroom, Regulus slammed the door and began coughing into the toilet. The contents of his stomach flew into the basin as tears rolled down his face. All he wanted was to please his mother, yet she was so cruel to him. He screamed into the toilet after expelling the last bit of sickness. Tears continued to roll down his cheeks. 

Having not locked the door, Sirius let himself in. Silently, he sat himself down beside his brother and rubbed his back. Regulus was at a loss. If he acted out like Sirius, he’d get beaten; if he continued to lay low, he’d be petted throughout the night. There was no way out of it. He threw himself into his brother’s arms and cried into his shoulder. 

“Reggie, what does she do to you?” Sirius whispered, still rubbing his back.

The younger boy sniffled, “nothing.”

“Please, if she hurts you, I need to know. I’m supposed to protect you.”

Regulus pulled back, “I said it was nothing!”

“I want to help, Reggie,” Sirius began to cry, “please, let me help.” 

Regulus hardly ever saw his brother cry. Of course, he could often hear him distantly as Walburga abused him. Though never had he cried in front of him, the cause being pure emotion. He decided he didn’t want to be like Sirius. He didn’t want to act out and talk back, or cry like a baby. Strong wizards don’t cry. If he was going to be strong, he couldn’t be like Sirius. So, Regulus slowed his breathing and dried his tears. Standing from the tiled flooring, he flushed the toilet and marched out of the bathroom.

“I said it was nothing,” he repeated more calmly.

***

September 1, 1972

Excitement turned into anxiety as the first of September drew nearer. Having hardly slept the night before, Regulus was up and moving before the sun had risen. His black leather trunk was neatly packed with his robes, books, potion ingredients, and more. Karasi was meowing loudly from inside her little cage, making it clear she was quite unhappy with the arrangement. 

“It’s only for a little while,” Regulus whispered, bringing the cage up to his face. Karasi brushed her whiskers against the wiring, and meowed again. 

It was exceptionally warm out, and a bit humid. The windows were wide open, allowing a bit of a breeze to enter the room. Wiping the bit of perspiration from his forehead, Regulus studied his reflection. The temperature demanded lightweight fabric and a more casual look. He paired a set of wide-legged brown trousers with a green short-sleeved button down shirt. The clothes were thin and breathable, and comfortable enough for the long train ride. He put on his Hogwarts required Summer robe and slid his wand into the pocket. 

Regulus smiled at his reflection, feeling almost proud of himself. He pushed his curly hair back and tucked the front strands behind his ears. Funny enough, Walburga hadn’t said anything about his hair growing out. She even stopped criticizing Sirius’ unruly mane. Though his eyes still sported dark circles beneath them, Regulus was overall pleased with how he’d grown over the summer. Still quite thin, he’d grown almost five centimeters. To Sirius’ dismay, this meant that Regulus was now taller than him. 

“This is absurd,” Sirius argued, comparing their heights in the bathroom the day before.

“It’s hardly noticeable,” Regulus mumbled as he brushed his teeth.

Sirius scoffed, “everyone is going to think you’re older.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “everyone’s known you for a year, I think they’ll realize I’m younger.”

Sirius pondered that for a moment and then shrugged, “yeah, you’re probably right. Still not fair, though.”

“You must take after father then,” Regulus smirked, knowing he’d get a rise out of his brother. Orion was just two and a half centimeters shorter than Walburga, though not a great difference it was evident, especially when Walburga wore her hair up.

Clutching his chest dramatically, Sirius stuttered, “you take that back!”   

After having spat in the sink and rinsed it clean, Regulus turned and placed a hand on Sirius’ shoulder, “don’t worry little brother, I’m sure you’ll catch up.”

It was unlike Regulus to joke in such a manner, but after the splinching incident he felt quite different. He no longer wanted Sirius standing up for him or acting like his protector. To get Sirius off his back, he resorted to bruising his ego and not getting caught whining or moping. Regulus was finally off to Hogwarts and he didn’t need Sirius coming to his defense and embarrassing him. It was time for Regulus to find some confidence.

The memory vanished as Regulus jumped in response to Kreacher appearing in his room. The elf bowed his head slightly, his long ears drooping as he did so.

“Mistress requests master Regulus to join her in the kitchen. Kreature will take master’s trunk down for him.”

With a gulp, Regulus nodded and headed out the door. Soon he’d be gone, he’d be free. Regulus bounded down the many stairs, with a new found pep in his step. Swinging around the last banister on the ground floor, Regulus came to a crashing halt. Standing in the doorway to the kitchen was Lord Voldemort. His long black robes were tailored neatly, his hair slicked back, and a wickedly charming smirk painted across his lips. His tall frame and somewhat broad shoulders took up most of the frame. He was terrifying to behold. 

“Ah, Regulus,” his hands stretched out in front of him, “just the person I’ve been looking for.”

“You- you were looking for me?” Regulus stuttered and pointed to himself.

“I’d like to speak with you before you’re off to Hogwarts. Come now,” Voldemort turned towards the kitchen, his robes fanning out behind him. He appeared to float down the steps.

Slowly, Regulus began to follow. In the kitchen, Walburga and Orion were each sitting at opposite ends of the table, as they usually were. The Dark Lord motioned for Regulus to take a seat, though he did not seat himself. Regulus pulled in his chair, his hands neatly folded on the table. Walburga and Orion did not take their eyes off him.

“Are you excited to be going to Hogwarts, Regulus?” the Dark Lord mused.

“I am, sir,” Regulus nodded vigorously.

“I deeply cherished my time there,” his tone was cool and unwavering, almost hypnotic, “I learned so much over the years. I was a prefect, head boy, and even received the Medal for Magical Merritt.”

The Dark Lord smiled slightly as he bragged. Regulus simply nodded along.

He continued, “though I excelled in every class. It was the Dark Arts I admired most.”

Regulus’ heart leapt at the words. 

“I see a bit of myself in you. You’re intelligent, you thirst knowledge, yet you are resourceful,” Regulus blinked up at the man, “yes, I can tell. You have ambition, young Regulus, ambition to be the best Hogwarts has ever seen, to make your family proud.”

As Voldemort spoke, it was as if he were reading Regulus like a book.

“Yet you worry. Worry that you are not good enough, not strong enough. I promise you, Regulus, if you follow my words, you follow your parents instructions,” he gestured towards Orion and Walburga, their shoulders straightened in response, “then you will be great.”

Great.

“Thank you. I- I will listen. I will do whatever I can,” Regulus’ throat was dry, his words coming out slightly hoarse. 

“I am glad to hear it,” the Dark Lord turned away from the boy, “Orion, a word, please?”

Once Regulus’ father had followed Voldemort back up the stairs, Walburga flew to Regulus’ side. She was grinning ear to ear, truly happy. Regulus had never seen her so happy.

“You did wonderfully,” she breathed out the words.

Regulus didn’t know what to say, though his stomach grumbled loudly, “may I have some breakfast now?”

Walburga chuckled softly, it was a strange sound.

“Kreacher,” she called and the elf appeared, “serve the boy his food.”

“Of course, Mistress,” he bowed.

Shortly after Kreacher began to dish out a full English, Sirius strolled in. He was quite a sight. His hair was stuck up on one side, and his burgundy collared shirt was half untucked from his wrinkled black trousers. With the flick of Walburga’s wand, Sirius’ hair was made right and his shirt tucked in tight. Sirius jumped at the sudden change, then took his seat beside Regulus. He usually sat opposite his brother. Unsure at what he was playing at, Regulus eyed him carefully as he chewed his beans and toast. 

Sirius let out a great big yawn before cheerfully exclaiming, “beautiful morning, isn’t it?”

Walburga was also eying her eldest son, as she sipped her tea. Kreacher served out Sirius’ breakfast as well, then scurried off. Sirius dug in, the grin plastered across his face never fading. 

“Happy, are we?” Walburga asked, unable to help herself.

“Indeed I am, mother,” Sirius smiled up at her.

Regulus sat quietly, his eyes darting between the two as he continued to eat.

“Why is that?”

“Today marks the beginning of my second year at Hogwarts,” he announced triumphantly, “I get to try out for quidditch this year.”

Walburga’s lips formed a thin line, her eyebrows raised skeptically, though she simply hummed in agreement.

“And Regulus here,” Sirius clapped his brother on the back, prompting the boy to choke on his food, “is coming along with me.”

Regulus coughed and his eyes began to water as he struggled to dislodge the eggs and sausage from his throat. Simply assuming he was just coughing, Walburga and Sirius paid him no mind. Regulus tried to gasp for air, but that only lodged the food further. He stood from the table and grasped at his throat. Sirius stared at his brother in horror as Walburga leapt to her feet.

“ Anapneo !” Walburga cried.

Instantly the food stuck in Regulus’ throat vanished and he sucked in a huge gulp of air.

“Melin,” he breathed out, as he bent over the kitchen table.

“You,” Walburga turned her wand on Sirius, “you could have killed him!”

Sirius jumped from the table, “I didn’t mean to! You think I’d do it on purpose?”

Regulus held up his hands before any other words could be spoken, “I’m fine. I’m okay, Sirius. It’s fine .”

Sirius dropped back into his chair, no longer as happy as he previously was. Settling down, Walburga claimed her seat as well. The three finished their meal in silence. Orion had still not rejoined them. His absence was hardly ever noticed, as he often left early for work. Though, he had left with the Dark Lord, prompting both Walburga and Regulus to be a little weary. Sirius had no clue that something was amiss and continued to clear his plate. 

“I’ll be right back,” Walburga excused herself from the table and hurried out of the kitchen. 

Regulus and Sirius exchanged a knowing look and then quietly followed their mother up the stairs. They heard voices from the foyer as they crept up towards the door. The boys kept their heads low as they attempted to eavesdrop. 

“Is he ready?” Walburga asked desperately.

“In time. He is still far too young. We must wait and see what becomes of him in that forsaken school. I’d send them both to Durmstrang if I could,” Orion grumbled.

“But the Dark Lord is pleased, yes?”

Orion sighed, “yes, but now it’s Sirius we must worry about.”

Regulus snapped his head around and gave Sirius a questioning look, the other boy just shrugged his shoulders in defense.

“He’s too defiant, too unpredictable. I know well enough that he hangs around with blood traitors. We should just burn him off the tree,” Orion’s voice grew louder with anger.

Sirius’ eyes grew with terror. Burning was no joke. Andy had been burned off when she announced her engagement and Sirius had been miserable for weeks after that. Once someone was burned off, there was no coming back.

“Keep your voice down,” Walburga hissed, “there is still time. We can sort him out.” 

“Sort me out?” Sirius whispered.

“Shut up, come on,” Regulus motioned his brother to head back down the stairs. 

Just as they reclaimed their seats, Walburga and Orion were headed back down. 

“I’m off to work. Good luck, boys,” Orion nodded at his sons before stepping into the floo; green flames engulfing him instantly.

Walburga clasped her hands together, “time to catch your train.”

Chapter Text

Towering before Regulus Black, stood a pillar of red and brown bricks. On the pillars to his left and right were small signs which read Platform 9 and Platform 10 respectively. His fists gripped tight around the handles of the trolley before him, carrying his trunk and Karasi’s carrier. As he closed his eyes, the noise of King’s Cross Station drowned out around him. He pulled a deep breath of air into his lungs, and as he exhaled he charged towards the wall ahead of him. Less than a meter before he reached the barrier, Regulus’ eyes popped open. Going too fast to stop, he tensed his shoulders as the dark overcame him. Though almost instantly, he reappeared on the other side. 

Entering platform 9 ¾ all on his own was liberating in a way; a right of passage, though he’d done it quite a few times before. Regulus had barely moved before Sirius came barreling through and slammed right into him. The trolley went flying out of his hands as Regulus crumbled to the ground, breaking the skin on his palms. Sirius practically knocked the wind out of him (for the second time that day). 

“Oi! Move it Reg, you can’t just stand in front of the wall,” Sirius laughed as he dusted himself off.

Regulus bit his lip and glared at his brother. Everything was so funny to him, it was horribly annoying. Sirius held out a hand to help his brother up, Regulus simply swatted him away. Getting back up on his feet, Regulus winced at the pain in his hands. He was scratched up pretty bad, a bit of blood pooled between the broken skin.

“What is wrong with you?” Regulus hissed.

Sirius looked mildly guilty and was about to apologize, just as Walburga came through. She took one glance at Regulus’ bleeding hands and turned on Sirius. Neither boy had time to explain before Walburga smacked Sirius on the ear. Not hard enough to really hurt him, but hard enough to embarrass him and turn his face red. Walburga’s public displays of affection were quite difficult to watch. 

Grabbing Regulus’ wrists and yanking him forward, Walburga pulled out her wand and muttered, “ episkey, ” healing the marks on Regulus’ palms. 

“Where is your trolley, Regulus?” Walburga snapped. 

That was a great question. Regulus looked around, but the crowd on the platform was quite dense. His trolley must have taken a bit of a journey. Before he could get very far, a boy with a face full of freckles and a mop of curly brown hair approached with Regulus’ trolley in tow. He gave a toothy grin as he got closer, his front two teeth were a bit large and he had one deep set dimple on his right cheek. Regulus got the feeling this boy was quite goofy and rambunctious. He immediately didn’t like him.

“This your trolley, mate?” he asked, in a thick Irish accent.

Regulus nodded and took the handles, “thanks.”

“Name’s Rosier,” the boy extended his right hand, “Evan Rosier.”

“Rosier?” Walburga’s eyes lit up, “I believe you’re Finn and Fiona’s boy, is that right?”

Regulus caught Sirius rolling his eyes. He knew what he was thinking, just another pureblood kid.

“Yes, ma’am,” Evan eagerly shook Walburga’s hand, “my folks are right over there,” he gestured behind him.

“Ah, so polite. I’ll be sure to head over and say hello.” Walburga mused.

Evan then shifted his gaze towards Regulus and raised an eyebrow.

What? Regulus thought to himself and narrowed his brow. This kid was ridiculous, giddy and practically bouncing. He’d likely get along better with Sirius. Evan wore generic black robes, with no sign of house affiliation. He too was a first year.

“Regulus Black,” the boys shook hands, though Regulus was not eager to continue the conversation.

Sirius jumped in and eagerly introduced himself as well, always the social butterfly. In an instant, Rosier’s entire demeanor changed. His smile faded and his cheeks slightly paled before realization set in. His glare turned cold as he stared through the older boy.

“I know who you are,” his lip twitched slightly, “ blood traitor .”

The light in Sirius’ eyes completely diminished. He looked as if he were about to cry. Walburga was positively dumbstruck. It was one thing for her to accuse her son of being a blood traitor, but for another child to do so in public was a bit harsh. Evan’s bold statement questioned Walburga and Orion’s ability to raise a perfect son. Regulus studied his mother’s face, looking for a sign of what she was about to do next. Rather than correcting Rosier or scolding the boy, Walburga turned to Sirius.

“Sirius, how about you get on the train now, hm? Save a seat for your brother,” she squeezed his shoulder tightly before gently pushing him in the direction of the train.

Before he turned, Sirius gave a sad, small nod to Regulus.

“If you ever accuse my son of being a blood traitor ever again, I will not hesitate to forcibly remove each and every tiny freckle from your face,” Walburga threatened the boy with the smoothest tone and not a single waver in her voice, “do I make myself clear?”

Rosier nodded, his eyes ablaze with fear.

“I believe you mean well, child, but do not threaten the integrity of my family.”

The whistle from the Hogwarts express cut through the air, signaling its soon departure. 

“Alright, mum, got to go,” Regulus pushed his trolley ahead, leaving Rosier behind.

“You behave yourself!” Walburga called after him.

Regulus hoisted his belongings onto the train, scanning the narrow passageway for Sirius. It was beyond congested. Students racing back and forth, shouting and laughing. Regulus didn’t have a clue where Sirius had gone. Above the sea of students, Regulus caught sight of a somewhat familiar face. The tall, slim boy who Regulus had seen with Sirius on a few occasions had entered a compartment. If Sirius was anywhere, he’d be there. So, Regulus took his trunk in one hand and Karasi’s cage in the other and pushed through the crowd to reach the compartment Remus Lupin had just entered. Sure enough, he was right.

“Reggie! You found us,” Sirius was beaming, “I can properly introduce you now that Walburga isn’t breathing down our necks.”

Since when does Sirius call mum Walburga? It was a subtle change, the other boys took no notice of. Regulus didn’t like it. Sirius’ blatant disrespect bubbled up some anger in Regulus. He knew he shouldn’t care, but he did. He just nodded at Sirius before turning to throw his trunk up on the overhead rack. Even on tiptoes, he couldn’t reach. His cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

“Alright, mate, I can help you there,” without hesitation Remus took Regulus’ trunk and placed it on the rack carefully. He reached for the cage, but Regulus held it close to his chest.

“No, she stays with me,” Regulus did not want to let go of the bit of comfort Karasi gave him. She meowed in response. 

Remus threw his arms up in surrender and reclaimed his seat in the compartment. He sat to Sirius’ left, while Potter sat on his right. Regulus was a bit put out by this, being forced to sit across from his brother.

“So you’ve already met James,” Sirius announced. James gave a small wave, their experience in Diagon Alley had not been forgotten.

“This here is Lupin,” Sirius playfully shouldered Remus, who rolled his eyes but still remained smiling.

“And that’s Peter,” Sirius gestured to the boy sitting to the right of Regulus. 

Each of Sirius’ friends were just how Regulus remembered seeing them before. Happy, bright eyed, and friendly. Generally these were characteristics Regulus had a difficult time emoting, especially upon first meeting someone. It was a bit overwhelming. 

“Boys, this is my baby brother, Reggie,” Sirius sat back in his seat, arms crossed, and a sense of pride about him as he observed Regulus. 

“What’s your cat’s name?” Peter asked, peering into the cage and sitting a bit too close for comfort. 

Regulus slid over a bit, his shoulders tensing as he eyed the small blonde boy.

“Karasi,” his voice was small in response.

“What’s it mean?” Potter asked, now leaning closer as well, with his elbows perched on his knees.

“I read it in a book somewhere. If I remember correctly, it means life and wisdom,” Regulus did not like the attention. Why can’t they just ignore me?

“Why’s her fur colored like that?” Peter asked.

James followed up with, “yeah, she’s got two different colored eyes.”

“Two different colored eyes?” Remus was now intrigued. 

“Wait, I didn’t know that!” Sirius exclaimed, sitting up a bit straighter.

“Is she half Kneazle?” Peter asked.

“My mum used to have a cat who was half Kneazle! Bit of a temper though, would nip at anyone who wasn’t my mum,” James laughed.

“She’s not half Kneazle, she’s a chimera,” Regulus explained, his voice was soft and his grip on Karasi’s cage grew tighter and tighter.

“I didn’t know your mum had a Kneazle,” Remus looked to James with his eyebrows raised, “you have to be licensed for that.”

“I said it was half Kneazle, Lupin. She doesn’t have it anymore anyway, I was really young when it passed.”

“I think having a Kneazle would be cool,” Peter mused.

“Well, aren’t they rated like XXXX? If it’s so dangerous, then they’ve got to be cool,” Sirius was practically jumping in his seat.

“They’re only XXX, you twpsyn. If they had any higher of a classification, you wouldn’t think they’re that cool,” Remus was suddenly very annoyed. 

“Yes, I would,” Sirius doubled down. 

“I really don’t think so,” Remus narrowed his gaze. 

“They can sense loyalty, you know.”

“Until it claws out one of your eyes.”

“You know how cool I’d look with an eyepatch, Lupin?”

“Are you sure she’s not part Kneazle? She’s giving me a look,” Peter asked nervously.

“You think her gold eye is magic? It looks magic,” James was now on the floor of the compartment, his face just a wand’s length from the cage.

“She’s just a regular cat!” Regulus yelled, surprising even himself with the loss of his temper.

The compartment was dead silent. The four Gryffindors stared at Regulus with a mixture of discomfort and shame. They hadn’t meant to overwhelm him, but it was already too late. Before anyone could break the awkward silence, the door slid open, revealing a ginger haired girl and a boy with long greasy black hair and tired eyes that closely resembled Regulus’.

“This one’s full, Lily, let’s go,” the boy rolled his eyes and continued down the corridor. 

“Oi, Evans! Good holiday?” James, still on the floor, perched himself up on his knees and stared up at the girl. 

Lily threw her hands on her hips and with a smirk looked right over his head, “su’mae, Lupin. Hope you had a good holiday, mine was grand.”

Remus looked quite smug. He didn’t need to offer a reply, as it seemed he and Lily had silently agreed on something before she exited the compartment. She flashed James a smile as she closed the door and headed in the direction of the other boy. James sat back on his heels, his face slack.

“Why’s she always gotta do that?” James asked nobody in particular, then spun around to face Remus, “teach me Welsh, please!” He clasped his hands together and begged.

“I’ll do anything, please, Remus! I want her to know how much I care.”

Remus threw his head back, howling with laughter at James’ expense. Regulus easily tuned out the laughter and the begging, as he turned his attention to the corridor. A wave of golden blonde hair flew past their compartment, as the girl it was attached to went skipping ahead.

“I’ll be right back,” Regulus muttered, not sure and not caring if any of the other boys had actually heard him.

With Karasi’s cage in hand, Regulus was bounding after Pandora. The train had already left the station, the rumbling over the tracks could be felt with each step. There were still students bouncing from compartment to compartment, greeting friends after the long break. Regulus dodged the passing students as he continued his pursuit, but Pandora was not slowing down. Distracted, Regulus slammed into a body exiting the compartment to his right. He stumbled back, his path blocked by the emerging student.

“Reggie!” The voice was high pitched and eloquent.

Turning his gaze up, Regulus was immediately overcome with a sense of comfort at the sight of familiar gray twinkling eyes and platinum blonde hair.

“Cissy,” Regulus sighed and threw himself into his cousin’s open arms.  

Regulus had not seen his favorite cousin since their family’s trip to Paris back in June. Since Andromeda had been burned off and Bella was out and about with Rodolphus (likely following Vodelmort around like lost puppies), it had been a fairly quiet holiday. Cygnus, Druella, Walburga, and Orion spent almost all their time together, leaving Narcissa in the company of Regulus and Sirius. Most teenage girls would rather die than be forced to spend their holiday with two prepubescent boys, but Narcissa wasn’t like most teenage girls. She challenged her younger cousins to various contests of flying, running, exploding snap, and wizard’s chess. In between activities, they’d collectively read together out in the garden and Narcissa would teach them all about her high level courses. She was quite good with them, as she possessed a motherly instinct many women of the Black family did not. 

“Oh, it’s so good to see you again,” Narcissa tousled Regulus’ hair, “is that a cat?”

Regulus held up the cage, “this is Karasi,” without a second thought he continued, “Andy sold her to me.”

Narcissa’s smile faded just a bit, “Andromeda? She- she sold you this cat?”

 Regulus sheepishly scratched the back of his head, unwilling to look Narcissa in the eye.

“She was working at Magical Menagerie, but I think she’s at Gringotts by now. 

It was well known that Andromeda had just married Ted Tonks about a week prior. Regulus wondered if Cissy had gotten an invitation, or if she would have gone even if she wanted to. 

“How was she? Did she look well?” Narcissa’s lip trembled slightly.

“Oh yeah, she was really pleased to see me. She told me to tell you hello for her,” Regulus lied for the benefit of his favorite cousin.

Narcissa sighed and gave a sad smile, “Reggie, if that were true, you would have told me that back in June.”

Bollocks. “Sorry, Cissy.”

“I appreciate the effort, though if you must lie, please learn to do so well.”

“Yeah, okay,” Regulus gave his cousin another hug, “I love you, Cissy.”

He felt Narcissa’ breath catch as she pulled the boy closer, “thank you. I love you, too.”

While clasped around Narcissa’s waist, he looked past her to realize he’d lost Pandora.

“I’ve got to go,” he broke free from their embrace and went bounding down the corridor.

He could hear Narcissa laughing behind him, “be careful, Reg!”

As he passed each compartment, he peered into them, looking for any sign of his friend. Their last meeting in Diagon Alley was a bit unsettling and Regulus was eager to get to the bottom of Pandora’s odd behavior. In the next car, about five compartments in, Regulus found Pandora sitting with another girl, Evan Rosier, and a boy he didn’t recognize. He really wished he could have just gotten Pandora alone. Regulus knocked once before sliding the door open. Before he had even stepped foot in the compartment, Pandora had her arms around him and her hair was hot pink. As much as Regulus valued his friend, all the hugging in such a short amount of time was unnerving. His skin was practically crawling.

“You have no idea how happy I am to see you!” Pandora exclaimed.

“You’re right, I don’t,” the sarcasm left his lips before he could stop himself and Pandora’s hair turned slightly more dull, though it remained pink.

“I told you, I’d explain. Not here though,” Pandora whispered before pulling away, “come on, sit down.”

Regulus situated himself next to Pandora. Oddly enough, he felt more at home with her and a random group of strangers than he had with Sirius and his friends. Observing the group before him, Regulus noted that the two he didn’t recognize were also wearing generic robes. They were all first years who’d evidently found each other.

“Glad to see you found your way here,” Rosier commented, “your mum dragged me by my ear to my parents after you ran away.”

“I didn’t run away,” Regulus snapped.

“So you know each other?” Pandora asked.

Regulus said, “no,” just as Evan said, “yes.”

“We met on the platform,” Regulus grumbled.

“Well this here is Robin Mulciber,” Pandora introduced the other girl, who sat to her right. She was a tiny thing with pin-straight brown hair down to her waist and thick bangs across her forehead. Robin wore glasses with the largest lenses Regulus had ever seen, she had to have been legally blind. She smiled and shook Regulus’ hand across Pandora’s lap.

“This is Charles,” Evan introduced the boy beside him, “best mates since we were babies, yeah?”

“Avery,” the boy ignored Evan and begrudgingly shook Regulus’ hand. It seemed that he too wasn’t a big fan of Rosier’s happy-go-lucky attitude. So much for “best mates.” Regulus almost felt bad for Evan; the boy didn’t have a clue. Avery had a stern look about him; his jaw was coming in square and sharp, his eyes were piercing green, and his nose slightly upturned. He had broad shoulders and Regulus could tell he was tall even while sitting. For an eleven year old, he was quite severe. 

“I’m Regulus. Regulus Black,” he introduced himself to Robin and Charles, so sick of repeating himself and saying his name.

“A Black, eh? Not like your brother are you? I’ve heard stories about him,” Charles eyed Regulus suspiciously.

Evan elbowed him in the ribs, “shut it, his mum will take your tongue for saying shite like that.”

Charles waved him off, “so are you?”

“What, a blood traitor?” Regulus stared through his brow, “no. No, I’m not.”

Pandora’s hair shifted green before she shook it away.

“Glad to hear it. See, us four may have just stumbled into each other today, but we all come from Slytherin households - pure blood households. I don’t think our meeting was an accident,” Avery smirked, as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“You think you’ll be in Slytherin?” Robin asked.

“I know I’ll be in Slytherin,” Avery retorted.

“I think I’ll be in Ravenclaw,” Pandora admitted, straightening her shoulders, “just a feeling I have.”

Completely taken aback, Regulus stared at his friend. Pandora had never mentioned this before. Sure, she had been nervous about being sorted into Slytherin back in December, but things had changed since then. Shouldn’t he know if his friend was considering a house other than Slytherin? It had never occurred to him that he’d be placed anywhere else, so why would Pandora even suggest it? He wanted to be wherever she was, but that had to be Slytherin. Yeah, Sirius had mucked it up and gotten himself sorted into Gryffindor, but there was no way that would happen to Regulus.

“S’long as you’re not in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff with the blood traitors,” Avery’s lip curled.

“I wouldn’t mind Ravenclaw,” Robin spoke as she looked out the window, “though I think Michael would hex me if I got sorted into any house that wasn’t Slytherin.”

“Who’s Michael?” Rosier asked.

“My brother, second year Slytherin,” Robin didn’t seem too thrilled about this, it seemed she also understood the struggles of having an older brother.

A bit of silence fell over the compartment before Evan began chatting about professional Quidditch. Though Regulus was a fan, his social battery was already quite depleted. Leaning against the wall of the compartment, Regulus faced everyone and the window which overlooked the outside scenery. He placed Karasi’s cage on the floor and pulled his knees up to his chest. For a long while he sat like that, staring out the window while the voices of his new acquaintances filled his ears. Pandora retrieved a book from her trunk and began reading, though she kept sneaking glances in Regulus’ direction. 

Regulus had always tried to imagine what his first year at Hogwarts would be like. He had always thought he’d be with Sirius, both on the train and in Slytherin. Before Regulus even got his first wand, Sirius had already made other plans. Never in Regulus’ wildest day dreams did he think he’d be in a compartment, on his way to Hogwarts with this particular group. Pandora, sure, but not the others. He’d always pictured Narcissa being with him, and along with Pandora possibly Prometheus as well. Regulus didn’t like change and he certainly did not like how his eight hour ride to Hogwarts was turning out. It wasn’t the company he had a problem with, just that it didn’t exactly align with how he pictured the journey going. It all deviated from his plan.

It wasn’t until Regulus awoke to Pandora gently tapping on his knee, that he realized he’d fallen asleep in the first place. It was dark outside the window and the candles within the compartment had been magically lit. Karasi was out of her cage and sleeping peacefully at Regulus’ feet.

Pandora followed Regulus’ gaze, “oh, she was crying so loudly! I opened the door and she just hopped right up. I think she wanted to be close to you.”

“That’s okay,” Regulus yawned into the back of his hand, “how long was I asleep?”

“Most of the ride, we’re almost there already. You missed the Honeydukes trolley, though. I got you a chocolate frog,” Pandora presented the package to Regulus and his heart swelled with gratitude. 

“Thanks, Dora!” He took the candy and stuffed it in his pocket for later.

“Where’s your trunk? Not that we need to bring our things off the train, that’s handled for us, but I thought it was a bit strange when you came rushing in here with nothing but your cat,” Pandora blushed, as she stared down at her hands.

“I was sitting with Sirius and his friends before I came and found you. They’re one car back, but I’m not too worried,” Regulus shrugged.

Looking about the compartment, Regulus realized everyone else was asleep as well. Avery was sprawled out across the other bench, snoring softly. On the floor, Evan and Robin were curled up, books and Bertie Botts spread out between them. 

“Did you sleep?” Regulus asked Pandora.

She shook her head, “too nervous.”

“You want to tell me what’s been going on? Why haven't we spoken in months?”

Pandora turned her head slightly, staring out the window, “mum and I moved out.”

The words hung in the air. Regulus didn’t know what to make of the information.

“After Easter my parents got into a huge fight. Voldemort wants to help train me with my metamorphmagus, but mum won’t allow it.”

Regulus was at a loss for words.

“Prometheus went back to school without saying a word to me. You’d think after all that stuff he said to you and Sirius about Voldemort being a tosser and how house loyalties don’t really mean anything, that he would have stuck up for me. I don’t know what dad said to him, but it convinced him to take it all back. Mum took me to the Weasley’s house in the middle of the night after that.”

Pandora turned to face Regulus, “I’m sorry I didn’t write. I wanted to, but mum wouldn’t let me. She knew your parents were hosting the Dark Lord and that they’d likely find out we left. She- I didn’t want to put you in danger.”

“Okay,” Regulus was having a hard time processing.

Why would Voldemort need Pandora? Why does he need any of us?

Regulus took Pandora’s hand in his, sensing his friend’s sadness, “are you okay, Pandora?”

“No,” for the first time ever, Pandora’s hair turned black.

Chapter Text

The Summer heat had been left behind in London. As the students exited the Hogwarts Express, they were greeted with a light sprinkling of rain and a deep chill in the air. As instructed, Regulus left his belongings on the train. Unfortunately, this included Karasi and it pained him to leave her behind. With nothing but the robes on his back and his wand safely tucked away, Regulus walked across the Hogsmeade platform with the other first year students. It was quite dark out, the moon and the stars hidden behind the layer of clouds. The only light came from within the train and from small lanterns hung on wooden poles down the platform.

A booming voice came from further down the path, “All firs’ years wit me! Firs’ years over ‘ere!”

A large lantern came swinging over the crowd, behind it was a great big man with a wild and untamed beard. He towered over the small first years; most of whom barely reached the man’s hip. 

“Down to the docks, now! Firs’ years to the docks.”

Regulus felt a hand clasp around his own as he stepped down from the platform. Pandora tried to give Regulus a reassuring smile, but even in the dark he could tell she was just as nervous. The cobblestone path along the platform turned to dirt as the group descended through a cluster of trees. The path was slightly uneven with large roots protruding through the Earth. 

The students walked shoulder to shoulder and hardly a whisper could be heard. As they trudged forward, the path narrowed to only allow three students to walk alongside one another. Still holding on tight to Pandora’s hand, Regulus felt another shoulder bump into his right. Robin whispered an apology, as she stared down at the ground as she walked.

“I can’t see very well, I keep tripping over the roots,” her voice wavered slightly.

Before Regulus could respond, he was interrupted. 

“Jus’ up ‘ere, now!” The semi-giant of a man called from up ahead.

Sure enough, the trees opened up into a large clearing which overlooked a wide black lake. On the other side of that lake was a magnificent castle. The structure stood tall and bright against the black sky. Every window was ablaze with warm and welcoming light, towers spun up into the clouds, and the cliffside the castle was built upon spilled elegantly into the water. Even in all its beauty, it was quite intimidating. 

“Wow,” Pandora and Robin spoke in unison, their mouths slightly agape as they stared ahead. Regulus couldn’t have said it better himself.  

“No more than four to a boat. Head along now,” the man ushered the first years forward.

Along the bank of the lake were several small wooden boats. Each one had a lantern on the front, but there were no oars to row it across the lake. Regulus, Pandora, and Robin climbed into the boat nearest them. Evan followed close behind. Taking a look around, Regulus noticed Avery settling in with two other boys and a girl who quite resembled a toad. Regulus laughed quietly to himself at the thought.

Once all the students found a boat, they all took off at once, steadily gliding over the lake towards the castle. Rain pattered lightly on the water, creating small ripples. Regulus was beginning to wish he’d changed into a thicker robe, as his lighter Summer garments were soaked through and awfully cold. On the other side of the lake, the boats headed towards a sheet of ivy which hung over the cliff face. Behind the ivy was a tunnel, surprisingly warm and lit with torches. It seemed they had sailed right beneath the school. 

After helping Robin and Pandora from the boat, Regulus fell in line with the rest of the students up a stone stairwell. It opened up onto a grassy field, right at the entrance of the school. They didn’t have to wait long before the large oak door swung open revealing a witch in a green robe and tall pointed hat. Being further back in the group, Regulus could not hear the conversation between her and the man who had led them there. Soon enough, the students were being ushered inside.

The entrance hall was massive, with a towering ceiling and a marble staircase which led high up into the castle. To Regulus’ right was a set of double doors, behind which the voices of older students could be heard. Regulus’ heart slammed within his chest. The sudden realization that he was actually inside Hogwarts made him quite jittery. It was such a strange sensation to be both scared and excited. He didn’t like that feeling at all.

“Gather around and quiet down,” the witch said, “your attention, please!”

A hush fell over the first years as they all gazed up at the woman before them.

“Welcome to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I am Professor McGonagall, head of Gryffindor house and professor of Transfiguration. Before I escort you into the great hall, I’d like to inform you all on what to expect. The sorting ceremony is a great tradition here. It is very important, as you will live with and attend classes with your house for the next seven years. Your housemates will become like a second family, in a way.

“The four houses are Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin. Throughout the year, each of you will have opportunities to earn points for your house. However, if you were to break any rules, that will result in the loss of points. At the end of the year, house points are tallied up and the house with the most points is deemed the winner of the House Cup. 

“Once I open these doors, you will follow me to the front of the hall where you will wait until your name is called. Once you are sorted, please seat yourself with the rest of your house. After the sorting is complete, the feast will begin. Understood?”

A soft murmur, the sound of agreements, worked through the crowd.

“Right then, this way,” as Professor McGonagall turned, the doors to the great hall swung open. As the first years marched in, the other students had quieted down only slightly. Some older students couldn’t be bothered with the sorting of a bunch of eleven year olds, and continued their conversations. Regulus really tried to keep his eyes forward, but the commotion coming from the Gryffindor table was too much to ignore. Sirius was fully turned around in his seat, making kissy faces and batting his eyelashes. He then pretended to faint into James’ arms. Both of them, along with Peter and Remus were laughing quite obnoxiously. 

Regulus pulled his hand from Pandora’s rather harshly. Though he didn’t mean to hurt her, Pandora’s wrist jerked slightly, causing her to wince. He mumbled an apology, while she stared daggers into him. Sirius and his friends laughed harder. 

“Trouble in paradise, Reggie?” Sirius called after him.

Red creeped up Regulus’ face. Other students began looking at him, though none of them knew why Sirius was taunting him. All Regulus wanted to do was crawl under a table and stay there for the rest of the term. His Hogwarts experience hadn’t even officially begun, and he was already silently begging for it to be over. 

The forty first years gathered at the base of an elevated landing. In front of them was a long table where many of the Hogwarts faculty were seated. On a small stool, centered in front of the table, was a raggedy brown hat. Regulus knew from the many stories he’d heard, and from reading Hogwarts: A History, that this was the sorting hat. Without warning, the hat became animate, its point drifting back and forth as if looking over the crowd. Then it spoke:

From atop old Godric’s head

To the shelf where I now live instead

The job is never done

When there’s first years having fun

You tell me all I need to know

It just a few seconds or so

First impressions are all I need

To sort you in your house agreed

Whether it’s Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, Slytherin, or Gryffindor

That will be your home forever more

The clapping which followed the hat’s rhyme was slow to start. Regulus overheard another student suggest the hat was beginning to lose its spark. It was difficult to imagine it ever had one to begin with. Professor McGonagall stepped up beside the hat and unrolled a bit of parchment. Immediately she began calling out names. 

Cheryl Abbott was the first to be sorted. Hufflepuff. A round of applause echoed in the hall.

Avery was next. The hat had barely touched the tip of his hair before announcing, “Slytherin!” The Slytherin table burst into a fit of cheers in response to their first newly sorted member.

As other students were called, Regulus admittedly blacked out a bit. Captivated by the ceiling of the great hall, his attention was turned upwards. It was more magnificent than the descriptions he’d read about it. Suddenly, there was an elbow in his side. Pandora was looking at him wide eyed. His name was being called.

“Black. Regulus Black,” McGonagall repeated herself. 

“Of for Merlin’s sake, go, ” Pandora hissed, gently shoving Regulus forward. 

He had to weave through the other students to get to the front. He could feel everyone’s eyes on him. Let’s get this over with. Regulus perched himself upon the stool and waited for the hat to be placed upon his head. He squeezed his eyes shut as his heart fluttered with anticipation. Though, much like Avery, the hat sorted him almost instantly.

“Slytherin!”

Cheers erupted yet again from the Slytherin table. Narcissa stood to greet her cousin, extremely happy with the outcome of his sorting. Trying very hard not to look too pleased with himself, Regulus took his seat beside Narcissa and across from Avery. Those pleasant feelings vanished when he caught Sirius’ eye from across the room. His brother looked wounded, betrayed. Though his feelings were clear, Sirius still offered Regulus a smile and a thumbs up. Regulus knew he’d be in Slytherin, so why did it hurt him so much to be there? He didn’t fully realize it yet, but that was the beginning of the end of his and Sirius’ relationship. They were now permanently separated by two tables, a long standing house rivalry, and an immeasurable amount of blood prejudice. 

The sorting continued. One of the boys who had ridden over with Avery joined him and Regulus at the table; he introduced himself as Florian Bulstrode. Shortly after Florian, Pandora was called up. The hat took its time with her, pondering loudly between Ravenclaw and Slytherin. After a long debate with itself, the hat chose Slytherin. Regulus cheered for his friend, thrilled they hadn’t been separated. As Pandora made her way over, she first went towards Prometheus, but he did not look up from the table. He did not cheer. Hurt flashed across Pandora’s face as her hair turned blue. Standing up, with a sudden sense of duty, Regulus quickly guided Pandora to sit beside him. Her hair faded to gold at his touch. 

The rest of the Slytherin first years included Barty Crouch, Lauren Flint, Dorcas Meadowes, Dolores Umbridge, Robin, and Evan. That was it. The ten of them, forever bound by a silly old hat. There was a bit of relief knowing that the friends Regulus made on the train were those he’d spend the next seven years with. He didn’t have to worry about getting attached to any of them and then have them be sorted somewhere else. However, at the time he wasn’t quite fond of anyone else save for Pandora and Robin. That was it, though. The sorting ended and there was no going back.

Chapter Text

The rest of the feast had been a blur. After the Bloody Baron came up through the table, startling Regulus half to death, he tuned out most of the laughter and chatter. Narcissa, being a Prefect, had volunteered to escort the first years down to the dungeons. Of course the common room is in the dungeons. Salazar must have hated sunlight and the views from Hogwarts’ many towers, if he willingly chose to put his students in the dungeons. Fortunately, the dungeons were located fairly close to the great hall. Unfortunately, that meant they were secluded from the part of the castle which held all the classrooms. Great.

The corridor which led to the dungeons was cold and damp. The stench of mildew hung in the air. The torch light burned green against the black stone walls. It was quite eerie, though Regulus had expected nothing less. Narcissa stopped in front of a blank wall between two sets of black steel armor.

She spoke just one word, “ potentia ,” and then a door appeared.

“That’s the password, don’t forget it,” Narcissa announced before stepping through the door.

The Slytherin Common Room was just a larger version of Grimmauld Place’s drawing room. Everything was green, silver, and black. Ornate rugs clung to the polished wooden floors, there were green button-tufted leather sofas in the center of the room, a few desks and bookshelves pushed off to the sides, and tapestries draped on the walls. The wall opposite from the entrance held quite a few windows which looked directly into the black lake, like an aquarium. Along with the green torchlight, the lake water added to the green hue in the room. To Regulus’ right was a large Italian marble fireplace, just like the one at home. Above the mantle was the Slytherin crest. Well at least there was no chance of Regulus becoming home sick.

“Boys dormitories to the left and girls to the right. Slughorn’s office is down the hall if you ever need him. Tomorrow at breakfast you’ll be given your time tables for the term. Other than that, you have tonight and the entire weekend to settle in. Lights out at ten o’clock,” Narcissa spoke firm but with a bit of sweetness in her tone. Even in the cold dampness of the dungeons, she provided warmth.

The girls were already looking up to her with big, hopeful eyes. Narcissa was truly a role model in the making. The other boys looked at Regulus’ cousin through hooded lids as blush rose to their cheeks, their lips all slightly parted. Oh, for the love of Merlin. Really? It was undeniable that Narcissa was gorgeous, but that was Regulus’ cousin! He elbowed Evan rather hard and the boy blinked in response, snapping out of his trance. The other boys seemed to wake up then as well, thus prompting the group to split and find their dormitories.

Down the left side corridor there were three doors to the left, three to the right, and one at the very end. The last door on the right had each of the boy’s names written out on thin silver plaques in alphabetical order. Avery pushed the door open to reveal a large rectangular room with the far wall arranged in a half circle. The rounded wall looked into the black lake with windows that matched the ones in the common room. Their five beds were situated along the curve of the wall, in between the windows. Their trunks were placed at the foot of each four poster beds. Wooden desks and armoires lined the other three walls. All the furniture was made up of various shades of green, black, and gray. Regulus hadn’t expected it to be much different, though he would have preferred the dorms to have a bit more life. 

Regulus located his trunk at the foot of the furthest bed to the left. Evan was just beside him - oh, joy. He was thrilled to find Karasi already curled up on his bed, and it seemed he wasn’t the only one who’d brought a pet to Hogwarts. Avery and Crouch both had owls that were sent to the owlery, while Florian had a toad, and Evan also had a cat. His was old and gray and seemed to not notice Karasi. Evan tried to make the fact that they both had cats a sign of bonding, but Regulus really could not have cared less. Students had one of three options for pets, he knew he wouldn’t be the only one with a cat.

As Regulus readied himself for bed, he could hear Avery rattling on and on about his family and how the five of them were given the highest honor being placed in Slytherin. Evan and Crouch seemed to play into Avery’s words, but Florian had already climbed into bed and shut his curtains. The boy had hardly said a word to any of them since the sorting.

“I overheard Lori Abbott talking about her cousin Cheryl during dinner. She’s practically a squib, hardly shown any abilities until last year. Good thing she was sorted into Hufflepuff, if you ask me. Most of the Abbotts have come through Slytherin, but Lori reckons she’s the last of them. Her older brother was a Hufflepuff and probably would have married a mudblood if he hadn’t been arranged to my older sister. He’s an absolute git.”

Avery spoke like that until lights out. Regulus had a difficult time digesting the pureblood gossip his new roommate seemed so educated on. Of course, he knew most of this information from the conversations at his own dinner table, but to hear another kid talk about the same things Walburga and Orion did was a bit off putting. For Avery to comment on other people’s arranged marriages and how much magic ran in specific families didn’t seem like most interesting topics for an eleven year old. Regulus didn’t want to think about weddings and blood purity and politics; he just wanted to go to school and learn how to be a great Wizard. Isn’t that what the other boys wanted too? 

Maybe Regulus was just so desensitized that he didn’t care. He knew what the “right sort” was and he had no intentions of going against his mother’s wishes. Regulus learned by watching and listening; eleven years living with Sirius taught him all he needed to know. Follow the rules and keep your mouth shut. That’s why he had no problem ignoring Avery, Regulus knew more than him anyway. What Avery didn’t know was that his sister had actually begged to marry Lori’s brother. They were quite in love and it was Avery’s parents who didn’t want them together. Regulus knew this because Mrs. Avery would often come over to have tea with Walburga. Regulus smiled to himself as he closed his curtains for the evening; Avery didn’t have a clue in the world. 

***

September 2, 1972

The first weekend at Hogwarts was a busy one. The first morning in the castle began with all the students being given their time tables for the term while at breakfast. Regulus was shocked to find how busy he’d be, but very happy for it. He was excited to finally start learning, to make something of himself. Breakfast was interrupted by the Prewett twins flying in on broomsticks, along with Peeves, throwing about what looked like balloons filled with flour and other spices. As the contents of the balloons rained down over the students, there was a mixture of screams, coughing, and sneezing that could be heard all around the great hall. Regulus had been unfortunate enough to find himself covered in garlic powder and like many students he couldn’t stop sneezing. 

Sirius and his gang were the only students aside from the Prewett twins to find this funny. They were scooping up heaps of flour and throwing it at each other. Lupin and the ginger girl from the train both seemed quite annoyed, but laughed hysterically when Potter received a fist full of black pepper right in his mouth. Maybe Regulus would have found the whole thing funny if his own housemates weren’t throwing an absolute fit about it. Narcissa was crying over the fact that she had just washed her hair (it was still wet) and that the flour was clumping it all together. She struggled to pull the globs out of her hair, only making it much worse for herself. Her boyfriend and fellow prefect, Lucius Malfoy was struggling with the same problem. Severus Snape, whom Regulus had only met that morning, sat there silently, staring daggers at Sirius as his friends, as if they had been behind the prank. Dolores, one of the other first year girls, was shrinking while simultaneously sneezing. It was a mess.

“ Scourgify !” the booming voice of Albus Dumbledore cut through the chaos.  

The mess in the great hall vanished instantly. Narcissa noticeably perked up when she realized her hair was clean, then quickly composed herself as if nothing had happened. A few residual sneezes broke the silence as everyone looked up at the headmaster. Fabian and Gideon were still hovering midair, smiling ear to ear. Peeves was already long gone. Dumbledore looked up at the two boys, eyebrows raised. 

“Detention?” Gideon asked with a smile, though he knew the answer.

“We’ll report to McGonagall right away,” Fabian pretended to look very serious as he nodded his head.

“What’ll it be, 10 points? I don’t think we should take more than that, the clean up was fairly easy,” Gideon mused, flying in circles around his brother.

“Perhaps 15 for the inconvenience,” Fabian replied.

“Ah yes, who would like to do the honors?” Gideon asked the room, “any prefects willing to take house points within the first 24 hours?”

“15 points from Gryffindor,” Narcissa announced, sitting straight in her chair. There was a slight twinkle in her eye, a bit of mischief.

The twins saluted Narcissa, both looking quite proud of themselves, before flying off. Her cheeks turned slightly pink before Lucius gave her a stern look. She darted her eyes down to her breakfast and mindlessly poked her fork at her plate. Nobody else seemed to have noticed the interaction except for Regulus. What in the world was that about? Bewildered, he stared at his cousin. Narcissa had five years on Regulus; whatever she’d gotten up to during those years at Hogwarts, Regulus will never fully know. He always thought that Narcissa being his favorite cousin, and he hers, that he knew everything about her. Regulus was now quite determined to not only learn everything he could out of his textbooks, but also catch up on the past few years of wizard drama. He wanted to know everything. 

After breakfast, Narcissa and Lucius led the first years through the castle, showing them where their classrooms were and the specific halls they definitely should avoid. All first years had the same nine core classes. Potions were in the dungeons, so that wouldn't be difficult to find. Defense Against the Dark Arts and Transfiguration were just down the hall from one another, while Charms and History of Magic would be on the second and third floors respectively. Flying was held on the Quidditch pitch, Herbology in the green houses, and Astronomy up in its own tower. Regulus felt the tour was a bit unnecessary, but the rest of his first year companions were hopelessly lost. 

As they walked through the castle, Regulus trailed closely behind his cousin and her boyfriend. Everyone knew that the two had been going steady for almost a year. Two Slytherin prefect purebloods - there was no better love story. They were both gorgeous, studious, promising quidditch players, and wealthy beyond measure. Narcissa and Lucius were equally feared, loved, hated, and envied. The two walked shoulder to shoulder, gently brushing against one another. Their fingers were loosely intertwined without their hands being fully clasped together. Narcissa was tall, like most of the Black women, and almost rivaled Lucius in height. For a brief moment they reminded Regulus of his mother and father, but that image quickly passed. Lucius and Cissy were young and had a bit of a glow to them. They were soft and happy and seemed to actually care about one another. Regulus hoped they stayed that way, for Cissy’s sake.

Regulus slowed his pace to walk in line with Pandora as the other boys marched on. He gently wrapped his hand around her forearm, causing Pandora to slow as well. They waited for the group to pass them by before coming to a full stop. They hadn’t spoken much since the sorting, though Regulus could tell Pandora was upset by Prometheus ignoring her. Regulus had his own older brother to worry about. But older brothers weren’t at the forefront of his mind.

“How’re you settling in?” Pandora asked, a bit of worry in her tone.

Regulus shook his head with a small smile, “I’m great. I’ve just been keeping my head down and listening.”

Pandora perked up at this, her brows slightly raised.

“So you’ve been listening, too?” Regulus asked.

She snorted, “the other girls are such gossips . Robin and I pretend we’re ignoring them, but we’ve just been silently listening.”

“What do you know about Narcissa?”

“You want me to tell you about your cousin?”

“There’s something going on with her, I know it.”

“Then ask her,” Pandora crossed her arms.

“Something happened this morning after the Prewett’s prank that made Lucius angry, or even jealous. I want to know what it was.” 

Pandora bit her lip and looked away, trying to hide her smile.

Regulus couldn’t stop himself from grinning, “what do you know?”

Pandora looked from left to right before leaning in and whispering, “Prometheus told me that during his first year there was a massive argument between Narcissa and Gideon out in the quad. Apparently they had been secretly dating for over a year.”

“You’re joking,” Regulus was slightly offended by Pandora’s whispers.

She pointed at her hair, “I’m not lying, Reg.”

“Cissy dated -” Pandora shushed him and he continued more quietly, “Cissy dated a Prewett?”

“According to Prometheus, after their very public breakup was when Narcissa started to lash out at the younger kids. That’s what he was talking about on Easter.”

“Huh,” was all Regulus could manage.

“She seems alright to me, though. Maybe that’s because of Lucius,” Pandora shrugged, “come on, let’s catch up.”

Regulus allowed Pandora to tug on his arm as they slowly jogged back up to the group. There was a loud whistle from somewhere above them on the moving stairs. All eyes turned up to see who the whistle had come from. Regulus groaned and covered his face at the realization.

“Oi, Reggie!" Sirius hollered with his hands cupped around his mouth, he then started making kissing noises as he slid down the banister.

Narcissa gasped at the sight while Lucius and Avery both stared at the eldest Black brother in disgust. The other boys smirked at the act and the girls hid their giggles behind their hands. Potter was close behind Sirius, though he opted to take the stairs. Regulus wished he’d never gotten out of bed. It was as if Sirius’ sole mission in life was to embarrass Regulus to the fullest extent. By the time Sirius made it down the banister, he looked quite pleased with himself. Potter playfully nudged him once he caught up. Both boys looked winded and wild, as if they had been running before spotting the group of Slytherins.

“Oh, hey there, Cissy,” Sirius grinned.

Before Narcissa could respond, Lucius stepped between them, “five points each from Gryffindor for sliding down the banister like animals.”

“I didn’t even do it, it was Sirius!” James protested.

Lucius sneered, “would you like to make it ten?”

James shook his head.

Sirius turned his attention to Regulus, not quite as bothered by the loss of points as James was, “so Reginald, I see you and your girlfriend got to stay together. I’m happy for you.”

He did seem genuinely happy. Regulus wished he wasn’t. At least then they could be miserable together.

“Don’t call me Reginald . And Pandora is not my girlfriend. How many times do I have to tell you that?” Regulus tried to keep his composure, but he could feel everyone’s eyes on him.

Sirius turned to Pandora, “does he treat you well?”

Pandora stared at him with wide eyes, unable to find her voice.

“Sirius, that’s enough,” Narcissa called out from behind him.

“Oh, come on, Dora. That’s what he calls you right? Dora?” 

Sirius stepped closer, a gleam in his eyes.

“Sirius. Stop.” Regulus was about to lose his temper, though he didn’t want to in front of two prefects.

Sirius ignored his brother, “well, Dora? Isn’t Reggie here just the dreamiest boy you’ve ever seen?”

“No,” Pandora couldn’t stop herself from falling into Sirius’ trap. The single syllable left her lips before she could stop herself.

Pandora’s hand flew to her mouth as her hair burst into flames. Everyone gasped at the sight. Everyone except Regulus and Sirius. Tears sprang to the girl’s eyes as she shook the flames away. Pandora looked to Regulus for one fleeting moment; she didn’t say a word but her eyes were screaming both apologies and pleas for help. Regulus didn’t know what to do. He just stood there. Pandora turned and ran in the direction of the dungeons. For a second, everyone was silent. Nobody moved. Then Robin went off after her. 

Suddenly, Regulus’ left fist collided with Sirius’ eye. Both boys were on the ground with Regulus on top swinging his arms wildly but never missing his target. Sirius tried to raise his arms to cover his face, but the punches kept coming. Without warning, Regulus was being picked up from under his arms. Lucius had a surprisingly tight grip on the boy. After being pried off of his brother, Regulus could clearly see the damage he’d caused. Sirius was hurt- badly. Blood covered his face and his shirt. And Regulus’ hands. 

“You son of a bitch!” Regulus yelled, swinging his arms.

Sirius smiled through the pain, “right back at you, Reg.”

“Twenty points from each of you!” Narcissa screamed.

That was the second time in a week Regulus attacked Sirius. What is wrong with me? Regulus thought to himself, still being held up by Malfoy. He just snapped. Regulus never just snapped . In that moment, a terrifying thought overcame Regulus; I’m turning into my parents.  

“Potter, take Sirius to the hospital wing,” Narcissa instructed, “Lucius, take Reggie to Slughorn while I take the rest of the group back to the common room.”

They all went their separate ways. Lucius held Regulus back for a moment to let Narcissa go ahead of them with the rest of the first years. Eventually, Regulus was returned to his feet. Lucius stared at him, his gaze cold and calculating. The older boy held his chin up and his arms crossed while he observed Regulus. It was strange. Regulus suddenly had the chills.

“Would you say you’re strong, Black?” Lucius asked him.

Regulus shrugged, “not particularly.”

“You sure beat the snot out of your brother just then.”

“He deserved it,” Regulus huffed, looking down at his feet.

“How about mentally?”

“I guess,” Regulus wasn’t exactly sure where this was going.

Lucius hummed to himself and then cleared his throat, “I’ll be keeping an eye on you, Black. Come along.”

Not even a full day into his first year at Hogwarts and Regulus found himself in Sulghorn’s office. Off to a great start. Slughorn was not at all what Regulus had expected. He was a plump man with a contagious smile. Though his office was in the dungeons and sported the same Slytherin green decor as the common room, it held more of that life Regulus had been searching for. The fireplace was ablaze with gold flames, rather than green. A large window overlooked the lake, rather than into it. There was a smell in the air that gave a hint of vanilla and fresh baked pie. There was nothing about Slughorn’s office that wasn’t inviting. 

“Ah, Lucius! What brings you here, my boy?” Slughorn greeted from his open door.

Lucius smiled back politely, “Professor, it seems we’ve already had some trouble on our first full day. Regulus Black here has been fighting.”

Regulus snorted. Lucius made it sound like he’d gone around picking fights with every student he’d come across that morning.

“It was one fight,” Regulus grumbled.

“One fight too many, I’d say!” Slughorn looked particularly abashed, “you may go now, Mr. Malfoy, thank you.”

Once Malfoy left, Regulus found himself seated across from Slughorn on a couple of rounded sofas, rather than at his desk. Regulus didn’t feel uncomfortable or ashamed; he’d take full responsibility for his actions and he wasn’t sorry. 

“Black is it?” Slughorn asked.

Regulus nodded.

“I’ve had every one of your family members come through my house,” Slughorn spoke as if he were recalling a dream, but then quickly added, “save for your brother, of course.”

“Of course,” Regulus narrowed his gaze and scrunched up his nose.

“Now, tell me what happened. Don’t leave out any details.”

Regulus drew in a deep breath, “my brother taunted my friend, Pandora. She’s a first year Slytherin as well. She’s also a metamorphmagus and she has this thing where she can’t lie or her hair will catch on fire. Sirius was making her uncomfortable and he knew what would happen if she lied. He embarrassed her in front of everyone.”

Slughorn made no comment.

“So I hit him.”

Regulus looked directly at Slughorn, just waiting for his punishment to be dealt.

“You attacked your own brother because he was making fun of one of your classmates?”

Regulus nodded.

The old man chuckled, “Regulus, my boy, I’ve seen so many instances of students teasing other students and it almost never ends in a physical altercation. Tell me, what did he say that was so bad, it warranted your assault?”

Regulus’ eyes wavered slightly, “Sirius calls her my girlfriend. He was trying to get her to admit that she liked me.”

Slughorn clapped his hands together, “a crime of passion, then!”

Regulus’ face grew hot.

“No, it’s not like that! She’s my friend and I was standing up for her. That’s it.”

“Settle down, boy,” Slughorn waved his hands, “your romance is of no concern to me. However, your behavior is. I will not punish you this time, though I can assume your prefects took points?”

Regulus nodded.

“Then I will leave you with a warning. Love is a powerful thing, Mr. Black. Even the love we feel for our friends will make us do incredibly stupid things. Be smart, Regulus.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Well then, off you pop! There’s still plenty of daylight left, enjoy it while you can.”

Slughorn practically kicked Regulus out of his office.

***

Regulus returned to his dorm, still absolutely furious with Sirius and quite surprised by Slughorn’s reaction. Regulus was sure he’d get detention, but in hindsight seeing how badly he’d beaten up Sirius was punishment enough. He worried what he’d do if he couldn’t reign in his emotions next time Sirius (or anybody else) tried to get in his way. The common room was mostly empty except for a few older students sitting around reading. They paid Regulus no mind as he came through, blood still on his hands. Inside his shared dorm room, he found Rosier and Crouch sitting cross-legged on Evan’s bed, deep in conversation. The two boys stopped speaking when Regulus entered, turning their attention towards him.

“That was bloody brilliant, what you did back there!” Crouch exclaimed.

“The blood traitor didn’t even see it coming. Who knew you had that in you, Reg,” Rosier looked quite impressed.

“Don’t call him that,” Regulus couldn’t look the other boys in the eyes.

Rosier continued in a light tone, swinging his legs over the side of his bed, “well all he does is hang around blood traitors. Potter and Pettigrew are scum and Lupin is a half-blood. Just because he was sorted into Gryffindor doesn’t mean he had to succumb to their low standards.”

“It was horrid of him to treat Pandora like that. What’d she ever do to him? You were right to have done what you did, Regulus,” Crouch encouraged.

“Will you two shut up !” Regulus rounded on the boys, “or would you like to spend the rest of the day in the hospital wing with my brother?”

Crouch and Rosier stared blankly at Regulus, a faint blush rising to both their cheeks.

Regulus took a deep breath, “yeah, he’s an arse and he shouldn’t have said those things, but I shouldn’t have beaten the piss out of him either. I know what he’s done and who he hangs around with, but that doesn’t give you two the right to shite on him.”

Rosier threw his hands up, “fine. We’ll never mention it again.”

Crouch nodded in agreement, then his eyes fell on Regulus’ hands, “you might want to get cleaned up there, mate.”

Regulus groaned and marched off to their shared bathroom. The sound of water rushing from the faucet drowned out Rosier and Crouch’s voices. Regulus knew they were talking about him. They must think I’m an absolute nutter. To hell what they think . Regulus turned the water off and left the dorm room without giving the other boys a second glance. He had to find Pandora.

The boys were not allowed on the girl’s side of the dormitory. Regulus did not want to know what would happen to him if he crossed that line. He’d gotten in enough trouble for one day. Instead, he mustered up the courage to ask one of the older girls sitting in the common room to go fetch her. He didn’t want to interrupt any on going conversations, his anxiety got the better of him in that regard. Scanning the room, his eyes eventually landed on a ginger girl whose hair was massively feathered. The girl sat alone by the fireplace, flipping through a brightly colored magazine with pictures that weren’t moving. Odd.

Regulus cleared his throat as he approached the girl, “excuse me.”

Her piercing blue eyes popped up over the top of the magazine, “yeah?”

“Would you happen to know Pandora Burke?” Regulus struggled to form his words.

“No,” the girl raised the magazine up.

Really?

Regulus wrung his hands for a moment and looked about. What now?

“Are you just gonna stand there, firsty?” the girl asked before popping her bubble gum.

Regulus straightened his shoulders, “look, I really need to speak to her. She’s a first year, too and I bet she’s just in her dorm.”

“What’s your name kid?” she asked without averting her attention from her reading material, she flipped a page.

“Black. Regulus Black.”

The girl snorted, “anything like your brother?”

“No!” Regulus crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes. 

Why is everyone so obsessed with Sirius?

“Shame, I rather like him,” she set her magazine down on the table beside her. 

Regulus’ lips slightly parted and his face dropped at the girl’s bold statement. A Slytherin who liked Sirius? This girl had to be mad. The corners of her lips turned up slightly at Regulus’ expression. She extended a hand to Regulus, her nails were painted hot pink and several large gemstone and pearl rings weighed on her fingers. Upon further inspection, Regulus noticed she appeared to be wearing muggle clothes. His expression changed to one of confusion and the girl just laughed.

“What? You think I’m a dirty mudblood, eh?”

“You’re not?”

She rolled her eyes, “Selena Slughorn, nice to meetcha.”

Regulus cautiously shook her hand, “how are you- um, related then?”

“My uncle,” she crossed one leg over her knee and her skirt slid up a bit.

Regulus pretended not to notice, “and you’re a pureblood?”

“S’what it says on my birth certificate,” Selena popped her gum again.

Regulus cocked his head a bit, “really? I don’t think mine does.”

Selena sighed, “jokes, kid.”

“You don’t look like a pureblood.”

“So I should just cover myself in ten tons of layered robes, never look happy ever again, and hex every mudblood I come across?”

Regulus pondered that for a moment. Narcissa and Pandora didn’t act like that. Nor did Robin. Not all purebloods were that heinous. 

“Then why do you…?” Regulus wasn’t sure how to ask what he was thinking, instead he just gestured to Selena’s clothes.

“Because I don’t particularly enjoy self-loathing. Do you?”

What kind of question is that?

“I-I don’t hate myself.”

Silence passed between them as Selena eyed the younger boy curiously. Then she stood and walked away down the girl’s corridor. Regulus took that as a good sign. With his arms behind his back, Regulus swung himself back and forth on the balls of his feet, pretending to be very interested in the tapestries on the walls. Most of them seemed to depict the Bloody Baron's adventures while he was still alive. Eerie. 

Regulus tried not to think about Selena’s last words to him. She didn’t know anything about him, yet she had the nerve to ask if he hated himself. What eleven year old would admit to hating themselves? How would they even know how to handle that kind of inner dilemma? Certainly, Regulus didn’t know. So he casted away Selena’s comment as he waited for her to return. Soon enough the third year Slytherin strolled back into the common room followed by a puffy eyed Pandora. Tears stained her face and her hair was jet black and dry, almost as if it were dead.

“She’s all yours,” Selena smirked, picked up her magazine and left the common room.

For a moment Pandora and Regulus just stood there, facing each other. He didn’t know what to say, but he didn’t want his friend to be so upset. He felt her pain, more than she’d ever know. The twisted knot in Regulus’ stomach made him nauseous and a lump formed in his throat. Regulus knew Sirius’ taunts likely wouldn’t stop, so how could he make things better for Pandora? He’d promised her almost a year ago that he’d look out for her, but once it came time to do just that, he didn’t know how.

“Pandora-”

“Reggie-”

They spoke in unison. Pandora laughed lightly through her tears.

Pandora’s head was bowed slightly as she looked up through her brow, her eyes were wide and the corner of her mouth pulled slightly, “is it true you beat up Sirius?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, I did do that. Yep,” Regulus’ hands were tightly folded behind his back as he continued to sway back and forth.

Pandora tilted her head slightly, “you didn’t have to do that.”

“He made you upset, Pandora. In front of an audience, too. I couldn’t let him get away with that. I told you I wouldn’t let you get picked on.”

“Well, thank you,” Pandora mindlessly brushed her fingers through her hair, the color slowly turning back to the golden honey color that carried so much warmth. 

“You’re welcome,” his words felt rushed.

Pandora averted her eyes, “about what he said… I shouldn’t have lied.”

Without warning Regulus’ heart sped up and his face reddened. He hadn’t really had time to think about what Pandora had admitted to. Because she had lied that meant she did think Regulus was “dreamy.” He wasn’t ready to unpack that. He didn’t want to unpack that. Pandora was his friend - his best friend.

“Look, we don’t have to talk about that,” Regulus quickly cut Pandora off.

She gave him a puzzled look, “but I-”

“No, really it’s okay. Sirius just wanted to get a rise out of you and it was really just his way of messing with me. Don’t worry about it, alright?”

Regulus really, really wanted Pandora to forget about it. 

“We’re still friends then?” she blinked up at Regulus.

He sighed, his blushed fading away, “of course we are.”

Unfortunately, it wasn’t that simple. They both could go on pretending that what Sirius made Pandora admit never happened, but now they both knew the truth. Regulus had become burdened with the knowledge that his best friend… liked him? Had a crush on him? While Pandora had to bury the embarrassment of having her best friend know how she felt about him. Not to mention everyone , at least everyone who mattered, watched the whole interaction play out. Professor Slughorn wasn’t the only one calling Regulus’ actions a crime of passion - it was the entirety of Slytherin house.

Chapter Text

September 3, 1972

Everyone hated the moving stairs. Naturally, this made Regulus love them. The halls were quite empty as classes hadn’t started yet. This meant Regulus could sit unbothered on the stairs and essentially ride them as they changed course. A few times he’d witnessed a group of students chatting mindlessly as they climbed, only to realize they were now being forced in the wrong direction. Regulus just leaned up against the rails and smirked as the students impatiently waited for the stairs to go back to the way they were. 

The grand staircase was also a great place for Regulus to get lost in his thoughts without Evan and Barty blabbing away or Pandora and Robin endlessly giggling. He admired the architecture and the paintings, and dreamily observed the ghosts float through the walls. Though he was alone, he didn’t feel alone. He felt free. Within reason, Regulus could go anywhere and do anything. There was no need for him to tread carefully through the halls, or hide under his bed, or wait to speak until spoken to. He could sit on the stairs without fear, and go out on the grounds and speak to whomever he pleased. Some of Regulus’ peers struggled to adjust to Hogwarts, already missing their families and their own beds, craving normalcy. For Regulus he was exactly where he wanted to be. He didn’t need to adjust because the freedom he’d been craving his entire life had finally been granted to him.

Footsteps echoed from behind Regulus, descending down the long staircase. He didn’t bother to look until the footsteps stopped right beside him. Polished black shoes poked out from beneath some of the finest robes Regulus had ever seen; so dark it was like looking into the night sky without the stars. He followed the length of the robes up to find a familiar face peering down at him. It was the last face Regulus wanted to see.

“Black, is that you?” the Dark Lord asked, raising a brow.

“Erm, yes,” Regulus hastily stood, “what are you doing here?”

Regulus became a bit panicky. He was finally starting to feel at ease and then Lord Voldemort just strolls on in. 

“I was just meeting with Dumbledore,” Voldemort kept his face expressionless, “just a bit of business.”

Regulus noticed the Dark Lord move his left hand slightly behind his back. A gleam of silver flashed before the object was obstructed from view. What didn’t the Dark Lord want Regulus to see?

“How are you settling in?” Voldemort took another step down to be more eye level with Regulus.

 The boy’s attention snapped back up, “um, very good. I’m excited to begin classes tomorrow.”

“I’m sure you are,” he paused, “can you do something for me, Black?”

“Anything, sir.”

Voldemort spoke cooly, his eyes piercing, “keep an eye on your classmates this year. Make note of those who… share our values. You may not be seeing me again for quite some time, but I trust you will have some valuable information for me the next time we meet.”

The Dark Lord noticed Regulus’ unease.

“You will do this for me, Black,” there was something in his tone that came off as more frightening, more threatening, than before.

Regulus gulped, “yes, sir.”

Without another word, the Dark Lord eyed Regulus carefully, nodded, and walked briskly back down the stairs. Regulus caught another glimpse of whatever Riddle had tried to hide from him. It was small and covered in jewels. A tiara perhaps. But what would the Dark Lord need with a tiara?

***

September 30, 1972

Bored. So unbelievably bored. That’s what Regulus was. He’d been at Hogwarts a month and hardly learned anything new. The only interesting classes were potions, charms, and transfiguration, because Regulus could actually use his magic in those classes. All the other subjects mainly required reading; much of which Regulus had done prior to the term starting. Beginning his Mondays with History of Magic had to be one of the cruelest punishments. He knew everything , not to mention Professor Binns hardly had a clue where he was during lectures. It was unbearable. 

To his relief, Regulus’ fellow housemates were exceptionally competent. Even Rosier. As a collective, they earned quite a bit of house points for answering questions correctly and performing fairly good magic. To everyone’s surprise, Crouch was a genius. He may have even surprised himself a bit, too. Barty sped through his homework and mastered almost every spell within a single class. Regulus and Pandora both reviewed his work, and he consistently got everything right.

“I don’t know how you do it, mate,” Rosier whistled as he passed Barty’s parchment around the table.

Regulus, Pandora, Robin, Barty, and Evan had been hunkered down in the library for hours already. It was the last Saturday of the month, rain poured outside, and they all had several rolls of parchment due on Monday. They had skipped meals in the Great Hall in exchange for sweets sent to Pandora from her mother. The round table they sat at was in complete disarray, covered in candy wrappers, chocolate frog cards, open books, ink bottles, and crumpled parchment. 

“It’s a gift,” Barty shrugged, trying to remain humble. 

Robin had her hands beneath the lenses of her glasses as she rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hand, “I’ve been studying my star charts for hours , how’d you finish so quickly?”

“Maybe he’s cheating,” Pandora mumbled under her breath.

All the boys, including Regulus, gasped dramatically. 

It took awhile, but Regulus had finally started to enjoy the other boys’ company. Florian spent most of his time with Lauren Flint, who spent most of her time with Dorcas Meadowes. The three were rarely seen without each other. Avery was a big pompous git who crawled up the asses of some of the second and third year Slytherins. Regulus had been spending most of his time with Pandora and Robin, but would ultimately get separated from them when Dolores would shove her way into their conversations - quite literally. She’d shoulder her way through a crowd just to get to them and physically push Regulus aside. Or she’d clear her throat with the most annoying hem-hem if nobody was paying attention to her. To avoid Dolores, as well as his brother’s continuous taunts, Regulus became closer with Rosier and Crouch.

“Even if he was cheating, I think we’ve all benefited from it. Crouch has gotten us 25 house points just this week,” Regulus exclaimed.

“Don’t be so modest, Black. Your numbers are up there, too,” Robin blushed slightly.

Pandora scowled briefly before returning her attention to her book.

“Flitwick gave you ten points for getting alohomora on the first go!” Evan beamed.

Regulus waved him off and turned his attention to Pandora, “how’s the research going?”

Pandora had been studying metamorphic abilities in her limited free time with McGonagall.

She set the book down, “well, it’s going,” she then promptly sprouted cat ears.

Barty and Evan burst into a fit of laughter.

Madam Pince shushed them harshly from her desk.

“I’m working on animal transformations before I start trying to look like other people,” Pandora whispered, “though I think unsuspectingly showing up to class looking like you one day would be hilarious. Even if I could change my appearance to look like other people, I don’t think I’d let you lot know about it right away.”

Barty sighed sarcastically, “I don’t know what we’d do with two of Black.”

“For one thing, I think we’d have even less of a chance with the girls in this school,” Evan smirked.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Regulus, Pandora, and Robin all said at once.

Barty and Evan began to laugh again, prompting another shush from Madam Pince.

“That means,” Evan gasped for air, “that you’re hogging up all the game, Black.”

“What? I am not. The only girls I speak to are sitting right here,” Regulus rebuffed.

Robin and Pandora both perked up at that, but quickly buried their noses in their books.

Barty rolled his eyes, “oh please, we spend three hours straight with the Hufflepuffs on Mondays and Cheryl Abbott can’t take her eyes off you the entire time .”

Regulus scoffed, “I thought you agreed she was a blood traitor, why do you care?”

Evan jumped in, “don’t get me started on Selena. She spilled soup all over herself last week at dinner while she was looking at you.”

“She likes Sirius,” Regulus waved him off, but he could feel the blush in his cheeks starting to rise.

Barty leaned forward, “what about Susan Ashe?”

“Duncan’s sister?” Pandora looked absolutely appalled.

“That’s the one. She flew her broom right into a tree out on the grounds last week while Regulus and I were skipping rocks.”

“That doesn’t mean anything,” Regulus was burning up.

“Aren’t some of those girls a little old for Regulus,” Robin pushed her glasses up.

Evan shrugged, “not Cheryl. Oh! And Donna Wilkes, too. Forgot about her.”

“Can we drop it, please!” Regulus demanded.

Madam Pince leaned over her desk, “if you cannot quiet yourselves, you can leave,” she hissed.

Pandora started to pack up her books - rather aggressively. 

“I’m going to dinner. Anyone coming along?” she threw her bag over her shoulder, refusing to directly look at any of them.

They all mumbled in agreement and began to pack their things as well. Pandora stood over them, just watching as her friends handed books and parchment back and forth until the table left no sign of their presence. The library was located opposite of the North Courtyard, which meant the five Slytherins had quite a walk back to the Great Hall. The simplest path was to go across the suspension bridge, through the quad, and past the grand staircase. It was simple enough on paper, but with their bags full of books and their stomachs full of candy, it seemed to take forever. Not to mention it was still raining.

At dinner, Regulus was lost in thought. Everyday he came back to the conversation he’d had with Voldemort in the stairwell. Since then he began keeping a mental list of those he believed aligned with Voldemort’s views, those who definitely went against them, and those who fell in between. So far, all of his dorm mates except for Florian had made the top of the list. The girls on the other hand, Regulus wasn’t too sure about. Umbridge definitely fit the bill, but Regulus wanted no ties to her other than their shared house. There were some older students who Regulus observed during meals and in the common room, quite a few of them seemed to already be on board with the Dark Lord’s teachings.

For starters, Cissy and Lucius were already acquainted with Voldemort through Bella. They didn’t keep it a secret either. Regulus overheard them on multiple occasions bragging about how the Malfoy’s hosted the Dark Lord for dinner several times over the Summer holiday. Meanwhile, Severus Snape, Michael Mulciber, and Prometheus always had their heads together. It seemed the three of them had some sort of vendetta against Sirius and his friends. The two groups were constantly hexing each other, getting detentions, and reducing house points. Avery often joined in with them. 

It was difficult for Pandora and Regulus to witness the assaults on their both brothers. Though it was equally difficult to watch them actually use harmful spells. Neither boy had ever been particularly hateful or reckless, but nothing could stop them once their paths crossed. While Pandora and Regulus flinched at every action taken by or against Prometheus and Sirius, Robin seemed quite indifferent about Michael. Since their first train ride, Robin hadn't acknowledged Michael at all. The two never spoke. When her brother went around cursing people and receiving detentions, she hardly cared to notice. Sure, Robin was quite, but even Regulus couldn't think so little of Sirius to completely ignore his behavior. Whatever had happened between the Mulciber siblings was a question nobody was prepared to ask.

There was one particular instance where Sirius, James, and Peter were found hanging from the gargoyles near the clock tower by their underwear. A witness claimed it had been Prometheus and Snape who’d done it, but the two were never proven guilty. It wasn’t until that evening in the common room that the boys were outwardly boasting about it. Michael had been in detention at the time of their "prank" and was feeling particularly left out of the fun. Meanwhile, Narcissa had been sitting right there , heard their confession, and she did nothing. She did nothing but give just the slightest smile. A smile which told Regulus that she really didn’t care about Sirius. He might have been the only one left in their family who did.

There was one thing Regulus couldn’t quite understand. While Severus Snape was running about Hogwarts, seeking to harm Sirius and his friends, why the hell was he always with Lily Evans? Right away Regulus noticed the girl from the train had been in Gryffindor; she was friends with the Lupin kid, so she was never far from Sirius and James. Though for some reason, when she wasn’t with her own house, she was with Snape. They studied together, ate breakfast together, and relaxed in the quad together. It didn’t make any sense.  

“Pandora,” Regulus turned his attention to find Pandora with a fork of pasta halfways to her lips.

She closed her mouth and set her fork down, “yes?”

“What do you know about Lily Evans?” he asked quietly, so the others wouldn’t overhear.

Pandora squinted across the table, her lips pressed into a thin line, “excuse me?”

Regulus leaned forward, “Lily Evans. The Welsh ginger in Gryffindor. What’s with her and Snape?”

“Why do you care?” she snapped.

For the love of Merlin.

“What is your problem? I’m just asking a question.”

“ What’s my problem? ” Pandora bursted.

Evan and Barty were now quite aware of the conversation and making eyes at each other, trying not to laugh.

“Yeah, why are you getting so snippy with me?” Regulus was thoroughly annoyed now, “I just wanted to know why Snape is always breathing down her neck, seeing as she’s always with Sirius and his gang.”

Pandora’s expression softened just slightly. Regulus had to admit, she was getting better at controlling her emotions; her hair hadn’t been changing much lately.

“Their neighbors,” Robin spoke quietly from beside Pandora, "her family moved to Cokeworth a few years ago."

For a moment Regulus and Pandora looked at their friend in stunned silence. Robin shrugged.

“She’s a filthy mudblood, though,” Evan sneered, “don’t make no bloody sense why Snape traipses after her.”

A mudblood.

“He’s friends with a mudblood?” Regulus couldn’t believe the words coming out of his own mouth.

“Don’t go making enemies with him, now. He’ll slip a strong enough sleeping drought into your morning tea to knock you out for a week,” Crouch added, “I heard he did that to Jacob Goldstein last year.”

Maybe Snape wasn’t who Regulus thought he was. He’d deliberate over that some more later. Regulus returned to his mental list. The only interactions he’d had with other first years were in class. There wasn’t much time for personal conversations then, but from what he’d gathered so far, Quirinus Quirrell could be a potential asset. The others had written Cheryl off as a blood traitor, but Regulus wasn’t too sure about that. Her cousin had married Avery’s sister, not to mention Lori might have been just as delusional as Bella. Regulus added Lori to the list.

The list of those who didn’t agree with blood purity values was much more extensive than Regulus initially had expected. Any mudbloods and most half bloods were autonomically cast aside. Half of Hufflepuff and quite a few Ravenclaws didn’t align. Most of Gryffindor house, save for Patricia Rakepike and maybe the Prewett twins, didn’t stand a chance. Regulus wasn’t sure whether or not to include Sirius in his thoughts. Everyone around him called him a blood traitor, but Regulus couldn’t bring himself to accept that.

Almost everyday Regulus pondered why he was making these lists at all. Because the Dark Lord told you to. He hated it. It was distracting. But he said you’d be great. Great. That’s what he was striving for. Regulus had to be great. He had to be the best. His parents were counting on him to be the best. Though truly you don’t care about what they think? Regulus hadn’t heard from either of his parents since the first day of class. They sent him a letter congratulating him on his sorting along with some treats and a new book. They love me. Did they? The Dark Lord told me to do this for him, so I will! Regulus slammed his fork down on the table and stormed out of the Great Hall. Nobody followed him.

Chapter Text

October 29, 1972

In a great bout of effort and an entire weekend in early October devoted to school work, Regulus was able to finish all of his minor assignments for the rest of the term. With the help of Barty, he and Rosier were now well ahead of their peers and had an ample amount of free time. All they had left to complete were the papers they had yet to be assigned and their mid term exams in December. If Regulus hadn’t been properly bored before, he was now.  

Temperatures began to drastically drop as Fall turned into Winter. Regulus liked the cold weather. In his new found free time, he escaped to the lake or the astronomy tower with a good, long book. The cold air nipped at his cheeks and swept through his thick curls. His lungs burned with every inhalation and the air which he exhaled was a visible mist. Things like that reminded Regulus that he was alive. He was safe. For hours Regulus could sit like that. Unbothered and alone. It was a strange comfort. Most other students opted not to endure the cold if they didn’t have to. This was fine by Regulus. After a few attempts, Evan and Barty stopped trying to bring him inside. Pandora and Robin sat with him early in the month, but once it got too cold, they retired to the castle’s warmth. 

It became evident that the others were a bit put out by Regulus’ behavior. They desperately wanted him to rejoin them in the library or the common room, but he just wanted to be outside. Nobody understood what Regulus felt out there, how much he benefited from the quiet cold. This made Pandora slightly cross with him, Robin had reverted to her shy and timid ways, and the boys began to spend more time with Avery and the second year boys. Of course Regulus remained cordial, as their behavior didn’t bother him as much as it should have. 

Sunday afternoon brought ample sun, though it was still bitter cold out. Regulus had climbed the astronomy tower with his very worn copy of The Tales of Beedle the Bard . He’d lost count of how many times he’d read it. The binding was coming slightly undone and the cover art was hardly visible. These were all signs of a much loved story. Regulus had been scanning over the words of The Fountain of Fair Fortune as a paper bird flew up over the railing of the tower and landed right in between the torn pages. Hesitantly, Regulus unfolded the carefully crafted magic. Inside he found a note.

Regulus,

I implore you to rejoin us, your friends, in the common room this evening. We miss you dearly and are worried about you. If there’s anything going on, you know you can tell me. At least I hope you know this. It’s not enough to only see you during class and meal times, as you are constantly away from us even within your own mind. It’s only going to get colder out and I would hate for you to fall ill. If my pleading is not enough to lure you back to us, perhaps some gossip will be. It concerns your cousin and a certain ginger mischief maker. 

I hope to see you soon.

Pandora

In a hurry, Regulus shut the note between the pages of his book and clamored down the winding stairs. A small part of him felt remorse in that Pandora essentially had to beg for his friendship. Isn’t that what he had done before the start of term? Unbeknownst to her, Pandora had left him wondering if he had done something to wrong her all those months ago. Now, it was Regulus who was making others question their actions. Regulus knew this wasn’t kind, but he also didn’t care much what they all thought. Just Pandora. And perhaps Robin. 

What really peeked Regulus’ interest was the promise of gossip. Since he had willingly excluded himself from daily frivolity with his housemates, he’d almost forgotten the promise he made himself to know everything about everyone. That was before he had bumped into the Dark Lord on the grand staircase and ever since then, his priorities included being the best wizard he could be and reading as much as he possibly could. The fun of sneaking about the castle and whispering with Pandora had become a fleeting desire. As Regulus crossed the suspension bridge, it occurred to him that sneaking around the castle and whispering with not only Pandora, but other students as well, could assist him in completing his task for the Dark Lord.

The bells tolled, signaling the start of supper. As Regulus rounded the corner connecting the quad’s South wall to the Entrance Hall, Pandora and Robin were reaching the top of the stairs, extending out from the dungeons. They all stopped at once, eyes locked on one another. The students were out of uniform and in daily wizard’s clothing. This meant the girls wore knee length velvet dresses with white blouses and matching stockings underneath. Robin in green and Pandora in blue. Being pureblood, their dresses were very expensive and certainly looked it. Regulus wore his usual black trousers and sweater with heavy his winter robe overtop. It wasn’t unlike him to be devoid of color aside from the rose in his cheeks and the purple under his eyes.

Though he was two months into Hogwarts and far from Grimmauld Place, Regulus was still having regular nightmares. He had almost asked Snape to brew him a heavy sleeping drought in order to block out the horrid dreams, but didn’t want anyone asking questions. Regulus was surprised, though admittedly relieved, that Walburga hadn’t been ambushing him with letters. It had only been just the one back at the start of term. He’d expected much more from his mother. Since Sirius had picked back up on his mischievous ways, he’d gotten his fair share of howlers. Regulus had certainly heard those.

“I got your note,” Regulus spoke sheepishly, his gray eyes slightly downcast.

Pandora raised her chin a bit, “so you did?”

 “I didn’t purposefully hurt you. It’s just hard to explain why I’ve been choosing to be on my own,” Regulus sighed, “it’s complicated.”

There was a twinkle in Pandora’s eyes as the corners of her lips turned up slightly, "then uncomplicate it for me.”

Regulus couldn’t help but smile at this. Without another word, and a new lack of tension in the air, the three friends entered the Great Hall together. Barty and Evan were already seated at the Slytherin table, at the end closest to the doors. Pleased to see Regulus in good spirits, they smiled brightly at him. In no time at all they were chattering away as if nothing had happened. Dinner was served and they feasted away.

“So, Pandora, what news do you have for me?” Regulus raised a brow.

Pandora looked down the length of the table and upon determining that Narcissa and Lucius were far enough out of range, divulged her gossip, “I saw Gideon Prewett in the dungeons today with your cousin.”

All four pairs of eyes were locked on Pandora.

She continued, “they were in a small alcove near the potions classroom.”

They all leaned in closer, captivated.

“Gideon was practically begging Narcissa to come back to him,” she cleared her throat and began to imitate, “‘oh, Cissy, please! Malfoy is a git and a right nasty arse. I could be so good for you, love. No one needs to know.’”

With mouths wide open and jaws practically on the floor, the four young Slytherins stared at their dear friend in disbelief, for Pandora had successfully morphed her head into that of Gideon Prewett.

Looking quite proud of herself, Pandora returned to her natural state and continued, “then Narcissa went on to explain how her mother would curse her into next year if she ever thought about leaving Malfoy, let alone getting back together with Prewett. She even said that your mother,” she turned to Regulus, “would burn her off the tree if that were to happen. This caused Gideon such a panic that he left the dungeons immediately, looking quite upset.”

Nevermind the story, “how did you do that?” Regulus asked.

“I’ve been practicing,” Pandora proclaimed proudly.

Barty cocked his head to the side, “wait, how did you manage to hear all that? I know that alcove and it’s quite difficult to eavesdrop there and not be seen.” 

Pandora laughed, throwing her hair behind her shoulder, “oh, did I fail to mention? I was Narcissa.”

Robin spit her pumpkin juice straight across the table into Evan’s face. They all fell into a fit of laughter. Pandora’s hair turned a bright shade of pink. The sight of them all laughing and Pandora happy enough to lose control of her hair ignited a small flame in Regulus’ chest. He’d missed out on so much in the past month, it was bitter sweet to have a moment such as that live in his memory.

Before their laughter had fully ceased, it was promptly replaced with sudden disgruntled shouts and yelps. Bats - full sized bats - were crawling out from their noses. It was absolute chaos. The entirety of Slytherin house was screaming and crying as bats emerged from every individual's nostrils. Everyone was standing and holding their noses, but the bats just kept coming. Tears sprang to Regulus’ eyes as a result of both his pain and panic. Nobody knew what was happening, but laughter could be heard in the distance. Four Gryffindor boys sat on the other side of the room howling and slapping their knees as bats flew about the Great Hall. Students in other houses began to scream and duck their heads as well, in fear of the winged mammals. 

It took a few frantic moments for the bats to stop sprouting from the Slytherin’s noses. Soon everyone began to calm and reclaimed their seats but most had no idea what had happened. They all looked around, clearly bewildered. Regulus knew who was responsible. It seemed Snape did as well, for he was staring daggers at Sirius and his friends. The pranks and torment had finally gone beyond their little feud, for they had made themselves enemies of all Slytherins. From the head table, Dumbledore waved his wand and seemed to cast an invisible lasso. He rounded up the bats and promptly evacuated them all from the Great Hall out an open window. It snapped shut as the last bat went through. 

The Great Hall was silent.

“To the students who casted the bat-bogey hex, it would be wise of you to turn yourselves in. Failure to do so in a timely fashion will result in harsher detentions and a major loss of House points,” Dumbledore’s eyes briefly fell on the Gryffindors before moving on, “to those of you afflicted by the hex, please feel free to seem Madam Pomfrey. You will not be penalized for being in the halls past curfew if you are returning to your dorms from the hospital wing.”

All the students remained silent as they stared up at their head master, waiting for further instruction.

“Well, continue your meal,” Dumbledore waved his hands and everyone hesitantly returned to their dinner and conversations.

Regulus had lost his appetite. As did most other Slytherins. He felt as if he’d been vandalized. It was a horrible and unsettling feeling. Regulus wrinkled his nose, the feeling of the bats still lingering. It had been a terrible bodily invasion. Though quite disgusted and nauseated from the situation, Regulus was most upset that he knew this feeling well. The bat-bogey hex might as well have been performed by Walburga herself, for that’s exactly what it felt like in the aftermath of it all.

Regulus stood from the table just as Robin did. They stopped and looked blankly at one another for a moment.

Clearing his throat, Regulus spoke to no one in particular, “I think I’ll turn in for the night.”

He turned quickly as Robin said behind him meekly, “yeah, me too.”

Together they walked down to the dungeons. It suddenly occurred to Regulus that he’d never been alone with Robin before. Whether it was Pandora or one of the other boys, they’d always have someone else to bounce the conversation off of. Instead they were just hopelessly and awkwardly silent. Their footsteps echoed off the damp dungeon walls and their shadows moved slowly through the green torch light. Though they had the entire corridor to walk, the two remained very close together. Regulus could feel the heat radiating off of Robin, a warm and very human feeling. It was nice and arguably better than the cold Regulus had been subjecting himself to all month.

“Are you well, Regulus?” Robin spoke softly.

Regulus pondered her question for a moment. Well I did just have quite a few bats fly from my nose, but other than that I’m just swell.

“I’m fine.”

Robin crossed her arms, hugging herself as if she were cold, “you’ve just been a bit distant lately, you know?”

Oh, this isn’t about the bats.

“I just like my personal space, is all. I’ve gotten a lot of reading done,” Regulus tapped on the cover of his book.

“Yes, I respect that and all, but why take all that personal time out in the cold? We’d all grant you your space of course, but we’re worried about you,” Robin tugged her bottom lip between her teeth. 

Regulus really did not want to explain his desire to be outside. He liked it, yearned for it even. He craved that bit of pain in his lungs and the pinch on his cheeks when the temperature dropped. How could he explain that without sounding absolutely mental? Regulus didn't owe Robin or anyone else an explanation. 

“I just like it, okay?” Regulus snapped and Robin tensed her shoulders in response.

The girl drew in a breath, “it’s only going to get worse outside and we miss you terribly. If you would just join us by the fire some nights, you could still read your books but at least you’d be warm.”

They both stopped between the suits of armor. 

“Can you just drop it, Robin?” he’d shouted though he hadn’t meant to.

Behind her thick lensed glasses, Robin’s eyes filled with tears. Her lip trembled as she turned to the blank wall, “ po-potentia. ”

The door to the common room appeared and Robin ran through. She scurried off to the girl’s dormitory, though Regulus didn’t dare follow her. Anger began to bubble up inside him. Who is Robin to ask so many questions? To request my presence? Even Pandora, though she was Regulus’ best friend, had no right to send him a note pleading for his return into their lives. They didn’t understand. How could they understand? Regulus stormed into his dorm and threw his book hard against the wall behind his bed. The spine cracked and the pages flew out, fluttering down over his sheets and across the floor.

Oh no.

Regulus began to gather up the paper, panicked by what he had done. First years weren’t meant to begin learning reparo until Tuesday. Just his luck. Though, surely Regulus could manage it. Though Barty was all brains, Regulus was the best at wandwork, surely he could cast reparo. It was just a book, how difficult could it really be?

Regulus drew his wand from his robes, cleared his throat, and spoke the spell clearly.

All the pages burst into flames. 

Shite.

Apparently even a minor spell can be difficult when not properly learned. The flames spread, engulfing the sheets and the curtains over Regulus’ bed. He hadn’t learned how to extinguish flames yet and he sure as hell was not about to attempt it. Regulus stood there in a panic watching the red and orange flames dance across his bed. The door opened behind him but he dared not to look.

“What the bloody hell have you done?” Evan yelled.

“I’m getting Lucius,” Barty turned on his heel and ran down the hall.  

Regulus turned to face Rosier, shock clear across his face, “I- I didn’t mean to.”

“You’ve almost set the whole bloody place on fire!”

Just then Barty returned with Lucius close behind.

“ Aguamenti !” Lucius cried.

A stream of water flowed from the tip of the prefect’s wand, promptly putting out the flames. Though the threat of fire had been diminished, Regulus’ bed was now very burnt and very wet. It was a dismal slight. The four boys settled down at once, the excitement of Regulus’ accident fading.

Lucius waved his wand slowly, uttering carefully, “ reparo. ”

The bed returned to normal, but the flames had quickly burnt away the pages of Regulus’ book, leaving nothing behind to be repaired. Regulus loved that book, he’d had it since he first learned to read, and now it was gone forever.

Lucius pinched the bridge of his nose, “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but ten points from Slytherin for your idiocy, Black.”

Fair enough.

“It has been a long enough evening as it is. Please, for the love of Merlin just stay in your dorm until curfew,” with that Lucius left the room, shutting the door behind him.

Evan rounded on Regulus, “what the hell was that about?”

Regulus’ cheeks were hot, “it was an accident!”

“Don’t yell at us, you’re the one setting shite on fire,” Barty argued.

“Well it’s out now, yeah? So drop it,” Regulus threw off his robe and climbed into his bed, pulling the curtains shut behind him. 

“Fucking lunatic that one,” Barty muttered.

Regulus listened as the other boys dressed for bed and closed their own curtains. Soon, he heard Avery and Florian come in and out themselves to bed. Once Regulus was sure everyone else was asleep, he crawled out from behind the curtains and changed into his pajamas. When he returned to his bed, Regulus laid on his back over his covers and stared up at the draped curtain above him. Merlin, he was angry. Pissed. He just wanted everyone to leave him alone! All the questions were bollocks. Regulus mourned the loss of his book and suddenly realized he’d lost Pandora’s note which was tucked away between the pages. He recalled her message; they were all supposed to meet in the common room after dinner. Surely, the bat-bogey hex had ruined any predetermined plans for anyone, but Regulus felt mildly ashamed. Maybe if he hadn’t gotten angry with Robin, if she hadn’t run away crying, if Regulus hadn’t set his bed on fire, the five of them would all be sitting in front of the fire playing gobstones. 

Regulus had let his temper get the better of him. More so, he’d allowed his own anxieties and insecurities to get in the way of his friendships. Maybe Pandora would have understood Regulus’ call to the cold outdoors if he had only allowed himself to explain it. Though if he did, she would just keep asking questions. Pandora was inquisitive, eager to get to the bottom of everything. A startling thought crossed Regulus’ mind. What if she uses her abilities to change into someone I’d confess to? But who would Regulus actually speak to about this, if not Pandora? In an instant, it was as if a wand had bit lit above Regulus’ head. 

Sirius.

Chapter Text

October 31, 1972

The entire castle awoke to thousands of toilet paper rolls thrown about the Great Hall, every corridor, the stairs, the trees in the courtyards, all the paintings, and even the Whomping Willow. Upon further inspection, it was realized that all the paintings in the castle were turned to face the wall, the ground of the quad was turned into a trampoline of sorts, and the corridor which led to the greenhouses had been covered in such a thick layer of slime that it was impassable without slipping and falling over one another. It seemed the Prewett twins, Peeves, and Sirius’ gang had teamed up to wreak havoc on the school. Filch, the caretaker, grumbled and cursed at every passing student as he attempted to clean the soiled halls. Regulus would have found the pranks quite amusing if he hadn’t had to hear everyone complain about it. Fortunately, Slytherin first years only had Charms and Flying on Tuesdays, meaning Regulus could quickly escape from Umbridge and Avery who never shut up.

The Slytherins and Hufflepuffs were walking back up to the castle after Flying when Dolores made her opinions very loudly heard.

“How are we supposed to get anything done around here, with those imbeciles ruining everything?” Dolores fussed, “and the professors hardly do a thing about it.” 

Avery fed into Dolores’ rant, “clearly detentions don’t work, they should all be expelled.”

Regulus caught Robin rolling her eyes and chuckled softly.

The previous morning, Robin had completely ignored Regulus. As did Barty and Evan. Monday’s were packed with classes and it was difficult for Regulus to get a word in. After dinner, he was finally able to speak to Robin alone. She had excused herself from the Great Hall and Regulus hurried after her. Just as they did the night prior, they descended into the dungeons together.

“What do you want, Black?” Robin kept her eyes straight ahead as she hurried down the stairs.

“I want to apologize.”

Robin scoffed as Regulus tried to catch up to her.

“I’ve had a lot on my mind lately and I didn’t mean to take it out on you. I am sorry.”

She just hummed in response, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose.

“Robin, please. ”

Regulus surprised himself with his own begging. Not even twenty four hours ago, he was angry with Robin for caring about his well being. Now he was pleading with her to forgive him. Regulus couldn’t ignore the tugging he’d felt in his stomach all day as he watched Robin actively give him the cold shoulder. Regulus desperately wanted Robin’s forgiveness, though he told himself he shouldn’t care at all about what anyone thinks of him. Yet, he still craved the feeling of being needed.

“I don’t have to forgive you simply because you ask for forgiveness, Black.”

“You’re right, and I was so incredibly wrong. I don’t want you to be upset with me, but I understand why you are. I just- I don’t really understand why I lash out like that. I promise it won’t happen again.”

Robin stopped dead in her tracks and spun on Regulus so quickly he almost walked into her.

“Don’t promise that, Black.”

He blinked back at her, “what- why?”

“Because you’ll break that promise. Breaking your promises will hurt more than if you just don’t make them at all.”

This was a difficult truth for Regulus to digest. He would break that promise and had only said it to get back in Robin’s good graces. Regulus hadn’t expected her to see right through him. He desperately needed a way to fix what he’d done. The other boys didn’t matter, if Evan and Barty wanted to wave Regulus off then so be it. Though for some reason, when it came to what Robin and Pandora thought of him, it did matter. It mattered more than anything and it scared Regulus.

“Tell me what I have to do.”

Regulus took a large step forward, causing Robin to take a skeptical step back. A moment passed as Robin seemed to ponder Regulus’ plea. 

“Just be more present, okay? Keep the lashing out to a minimum and don’t treat us like garbage.”

“I can do that,” a smile spread across Regulus’ lips

“That doesn’t mean I forgive you. You’re going to have to prove yourself, Black.”

After that, everything went back to normal. They were cordial in classes that morning and Pandora was beyond relieved that they were able to settle it on their own. Not to mention so quickly. The flying lessons were getting a bit redundant. Most of the purebloods and half bloods were fairly apt at flying and the muggle borns dragged everyone down. Ludo Bagman was already looking like he’d give Avery a run for his money as a Beater. With still a whole year left until they could even try out for Quidditch, those two had certainly built up a rivalry during lessons. It would have been Regulus’ favorite class, if it weren’t for Umbridge yapping through it every week. Even after two months, the girl was absolutely useless on a broom. 

“It’s Hooch’s fault.”

“This broom is too old.”

“The mudbloods cursed me.”

“It’s too windy out.”

Of course, it was never Dolores’ fault she had trouble flying. 

Pandora shouldered Regulus lightly as they tailed the rest of the group into the castle.

“So, we’re all on good terms then?”

“Indeed we are,” Regulus smiled, pushing his curls out of his eyes.

Pandora sighed, breathing out the cold air, “please keep it that way, Reg. Seeing Robin so upset was extremely unsettling.”

Regulus winced, “I really didn’t mean to upset her.”

“I know that. It just affects all of us when you hide away like you do.”

Regulus did not want to get into this again. Pandora could see how Regulus’ jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed. She knew better than to poke a hippogriff. 

Pandora shifted her broom to her opposite shoulder, “how do you want to spend today’s holiday?” 

Appreciative of Pandora’s ability to read his body language, Regulus smiled genuinely.

“I’d like to have strictly candy for dinner until I make myself sick. Then I’d like to tell ghost stories around the common room fire until Cissy yells at us to go back to our rooms well past curfew.”

“Funny, I was thinking the same thing.”

At lunch, the post was delivered. A giant sack of treats, being carried by two owls, was plopped on top of Regulus’ sandwich. Since the sorting, Regulus hadn’t received anything from his parents. The rest of the Slytherin first years gathered closely around to see all the special Halloween delights Regulus had been sent. Just as he was about to undo the bit of twine around the sack, Regulus looked past Pandora’s shoulder to see Sirius staring him down. A red envelope crushed tightly in his grip.

“I-I’ll be right back.”

Regulus gathered up his belongings and his treats and trotted over to the Gryffindor table.

The entire Great Hall stopped to watch him.

As Regulus approached, Sirius’ eyes grew darker and darker. Lupin and Pettigew sat opposite Sirius, with their backs to the younger Black brother. Regulus stood between them, his package of candy stretched out in front of him.

“Mum sent some treats, thought you might like some,” Regulus offered.

Pettigrew and Lupin’s eyes grew curiously. They looked from Regulus to Sirius, to the bag of treats, and back to Sirius. Potter looked quite on edge, watching his best friend closely. There was a sort of tangible tension in the air. Regulus didn’t know exactly where to look; Sirius was not giving off a friendly attitude and everyone was waiting for the penny to drop.

Without taking his eyes off Regulus, Sirius opened the howler.

SIRIUS ORION BLACK!

Walburga’s shrill voice filled the Great Hall.

Time and time again you make a fool out of yourself. You bring shame upon your family - you disgrace us! You are one mishap, one more detention, away from being shipped off to Durmstrang. You are a spoilt brat with no sense of dignity or appreciation for what you’ve been given in this life. Your father would burn you off the tree himself if I didn’t think you had an ounce of blood purity worth saving. Pull yourself together Sirius or there will be consequences.

The howler shredded itself into a million tiny pieces before floating down to the table. All eyes were on Sirius who sat there cold and rigid. Sirius received howlers almost weekly. This time it was different. This time he received hate while Regulus received love. For the whole school to see. Instantly, Regulus regretted going over there. He wanted to crawl under the table and act like nothing had happened. Shame rose to his cheeks and his lip quivered slightly. No. No more crying. Regulus straightened himself out, held his chin high, and threw the sack of candy on the table.

“Happy Halloween, S.”

Slowly, the rest of the students turned back to their lunches. Regulus marched back over to the Slytherin table. All he wanted to do was share with Sirius, to show him that at least he still cared about him. But in great Sirius fashion, he had to muck it all up. It was embarrassing! Perhaps their mother was right, Sirius was a spoilt brat. He ruins everything. Regulus fell into his seat. Pandora gave him a warning look and Regulus waved her off. He had to behave himself.

“So does that mean no candy?” Evan asked.

A subsequent groan erupted from the rest of the Slytherin first years.

Regulus was already deeply regretting his decision to give his treats to Sirius. He knew his brother wouldn’t eat them, so he’d essentially gifted a bunch of strangers. Though it would make Sirius feel like an idiot, perhaps the guilt of embarrassing Regulus would eat away at him. Maybe he’d even try to return the favor. This was doubtful. 

“Here,” Pandora took some candy from her school bag, “mum sent this over yesterday, have at it.”

“You’re always sharing, Pandora. You don’t have to-” Robin paused.

Everyone looked at Evan who’d already snatched up a licorice wand. 

“Wha?”

***

The day ended with a great big feast complete with pies, candies, and foods shaped like ghosts and jack-o-lanterns. There was even a performance by the Frog Choir. Narcissa stood tall in the back of the group, singing between a Hufflepuff girl and Gideon Prewett. She was so serious, staring straight ahead with a frog in her palms and her chin held high. It took all Regulus’ might not to bust out laughing at the sight. She had never told him she was a part of the Frog Choir. Maybe it was too embarrassing to admit. To see Prewett there beside her was almost unbearable. He kept stealing glances at Cissy, singing slightly out of sync at moments. Pandora noticed this too, and held back her giggles when she looked to Regulus. Her hair became a vibrant shade of purple as a result of her laughter being pent up. Regulus wondered if Gideon and Cissy had properly spoken since Pandora impersonated his cousin. If so, Cissy probably thought he was mad. 

Out of habit, Regulus looked to see if Sirius thought the whole ordeal was as funny as he did. Scanning the Gryffindor table, there was no sight of his brother. Nor Lupin. So the situation at lunch had really gotten to Sirius? He had never been one to let his emotions get the better of him. Sirius always fought back. Initially, Regulus worried about his brother’s sudden lack of presence. His worry quickly turned the anger at the realization that Sirius had no reason to act the way that he did. Walburga was right. Sirius had been given everything he’d ever want or need in life, yet he always acted out. The one day Regulus gets a gift from home, Sirius decides to start feeling sorry for himself? Sirius didn’t have a clue of how good he really had it.

He knows pain, too.

The little voice in the back of Reggie’s mind had a nasty habit of speaking sense every once in a while. Sirius was allowed to have his moments of weakness, but this was something Regulus could not accept. How were they ever supposed to become great, strong wizards if they both defaulted to crying over every single bad thing in their lives? Regulus believed they had to take the bad and turn it into strength. Instead, Sirius’ demons became his greatest weakness. Everything Sirius did was enough to make Regulus want to do the opposite. He wouldn’t allow himself to lose his dignity as his brother seemed to have. 

Thoughts of Sirius weighed on Regulus’ mind for the rest of the evening. As previously discussed, Regulus’ small band of friends gathered on the floor in front of the Slytherin fireplace to exchange spooky tales. In honor of his friends’ pleas to spend more time with them, Regulus politely pretended to listen to the whispered stories. With Karasi curled up on his lap, Regulus was lost in his thoughts. Far from his friends, from Hogwarts, he was so lost within his own subconscious. He hadn’t even realized how zoned out he’d gotten until Robin loudly gasped and collided with Regulus’ shoulder. Karasi leapt up and bolted out of the room. Regulus had to blink a few times before coming back to his senses. The green hue of the common room had greatly darkened. Most of the light was coming solely from the fireplace. Aside from the five first years, there wasn’t another soul lounging about the common room at such a late hour. Pandora had fallen asleep curled up on the floor and it seemed Evan and Barty had taken the lead on scaring Robin half to death with their stories. 

“Oh, I think I’m going to have nightmares tonight!” Robin squealed, “What about you, Black?”

Nodding his head vigorously, Regulus agreed, “absolutely, I will.”

In truth, he probably would. Though, not for the same reasons as Robin.

Faking a yawn, Regulus raised his arms above his head and stretched, “I actually think it’s time to turn in for the night.”

Without even saying goodnight, Regulus hurried off to bed. He needed an excuse to get out of the common room. The curtains around Florian and Avery’s beds were shut tight when Regulus entered the dormitory. Quietly, he scurried into his own bed and drew his curtains. Regulus tossed and turned all night as visions of Sirius being crucio’d and images of his splinched leg plagued his dreams. Though they weren’t the usual nightmares, they were still greatly unpleasant.

As the clock struck midnight, a new day and a new month opened up for Regulus to seize. The days were going by quickly, far too quickly. All Regulus had accomplished was a fair bit of school work and some simple spells. His friendships were rocky, his relationship with his only brother was on the fritz, and he was scared out of his mind that he still wouldn’t be good enough for his parents or the Dark Lord when he returned home for the Christmas Holiday. That was still quite a few weeks away but it nagged at Regulus. Lying in that four poster bed, fighting back the nightmares in his head, Regulus had all the time in the world. Yet the clock kept counting down and it wasn’t slowing. 

Chapter Text

November 3, 1972

There was a buzz throughout the castle that was more energetic, more hopeful and alive than there had been on any other day. Quidditch tryouts were considered a greater holiday than Christmas to the students of Hogwarts. It was the first Friday of the month and the students were granted a half day of classes, so that the afternoon would be spared for Quidditch. Each of the house teams were to gather at the training grounds after lunch where Madam Hooch would be waiting for them. More often than not, students who had previously made the team would stay on. This meant that all the second year students would be slacking in their morning classes as they day dreamed of flying across the Quidditch pitch and winning the cup for their house. Even those who could hardly handle a broom longed for the glory and recognition of being a Quidditch Cup star. Even if the fame was fleeting and lived only within the walls of Hogwarts. 

What was equally exciting and had many of the students in their third year and below eagerly anticipating, was Sirius Black’s birthday celebration. The kid was turning thirteen and somehow managed to have everyone eating out of his hands. Well, almost everyone. Selena Slughorn seemed the only Slytherin who liked Sirius. Regulus had taken notice of Selena always eating breakfast and lunch with the Hufflepuffs in her year. On the morning of Sirius’ birthday, she had been seated behind Regulus and was chatting with a few other girls. She exclaimed in great detail how “tonight’s the night I snog Sirius Black.” Eugh. Suddenly, Regulus was no longer hungry. 

The only class of the day, Transfiguration, had resulted in Barty and Regulus successfully turning their matches into needles and back again. Meanwhile, Evan managed to set his robes on fire, Pandora and Robin both created some kind of needle-match hybrid, and Dolores destroyed her match entirely. The other first year Slytherins were simply unsuccessful. Regulus and Barty’s quick and excellent wand work earned them five points each. To this, Dolores snorted at.

“Is there a problem, Dolores?” with her arms crossed over her desk, Pandora tapped her wand unconsciously on the crook of her elbow. A few mild sparks flew from the tip, though Regulus seemed the only one to notice this.

“Hm,” Dolores turned her nose up, “don’t you think it’s rather odd that those two always get everything right?”

“No,” Pandora answered lightly.

Dolores’ eyes narrowed, “you don’t believe they’re cheating then?”

Barty and Regulus exchanged a look. They knew that they weren’t cheating. McGonagall, the Transfiguration genius herself, knew that they weren’t cheating. They had nothing to prove. Especially not to Dolores Umbridge. Pandora, though she also had nothing to prove, had finally gotten fed up with Umbridge’s bad attitude.

Without missing a beat, Pandora casually exclaimed, “no, but I do believe you’re a complete moron.” 

Barty and Evan both threw themselves into a fit of laughter, while Robin’s hand flew to her mouth and her eyes grew wide with shock. Even Bulstrode, Flint, and Meadowes, who always kept to themselves, laughed quietly at the desk opposite Umbridge. Regulus simply smirked at his friend’s unexpected brashness. Nobody ever put Umbridge in her place; they’d all let her ride out her rants without comment because it was never even worth the effort getting into it with her. It was about time someone had finally said something, though nobody had expected it to be Pandora. Had they placed bets, Regulus would have put his galleons on Evan or Barty. Hell, even Dorcas would have had better odds at standing up to Umbridge, as she was unashamedly outspoken. But Pandora? The sweet, mild mannered girl, with a heart of gold - Regulus never would have thought. The look on Dolores’ face said it all. It may have been unexpected, but Regulus was proud of Pandora. 

Dolores opened and closed her mouth repeatedly, unable to form any type of comeback. Yet, she did resemble a puppet quite well. If he didn’t know any better, Regulus would have expected there to be an arm up her back and a hand controlling the movements of her mouth. It was a miracle McGonagall hadn’t heard the ordeal, as she would have taken away points just as quickly as she’d given them. It was difficult to imagine that she hadn’t overheard, so Regulus chose to believe McGonagall had quietly agreed with Pandora. The bells rang then, signaling the end of class. Regulus and his friends quickly exited the room and laughed heartily as they made their way to lunch.

The post arrived as usual. To Regulus’ surprise, Sirius had actually gotten something. Simply by examining Sirius’ expression, Regulus knew the parcel that had been delivered was not from their parents. Watching from across the Great Hall, Sirius tore into the brown paper and revealed a large thin square with pictures on it. From Regulus’ seat at the Slytherin table, it was difficult for him to make out what the gift was. However, everyone within close proximity of his brother were now standing over him or leaning across the table for a better look at what he’d gotten. To Regulus’ left, Snape was also watching with piercing black eyes and a strong grip on his utensils. Mulciber and Prometheus took no notice of their friend’s behavior. Perhaps because it was not out of the ordinary for Snape to plot quietly against his Gryffindor counterparts. 

Snape’s stare intensified as Lily Evans leaned down between Potter and Sirius to get a better look at whatever Sirius had gotten. She placed a hand on James’ shoulder to steady herself and her long red hair draped over her shoulders and blocked Potter’s view of Sirius. From Regulus’ point of view, as well as Snape's, he could see James’ stare turn up towards Lily’s face. Regulus was vaguely aware of Potter’s crush on the mudblood, as seen by his pathetic plea to Lupin to teach him Welsh on the Hogwarts Express. It seemed Snape was aware of this as well. There was only one other person in the whole world whom Regulus had seen so quietly filled with rage and that was his own father. Just like Orion, Severus had become stonelike and red in the face, his eyes void of every emotion except hatred, and all his visible veins popped up from beneath his skin and carved terrifying patterns through his pale complexion. Severus Snape had never looked so haunting.

Breaking his stare, Pandora leaned into Regulus, “you would not believe what Cheryl was saying about your brother in Transfiguration today.”

Coming back to his senses was like waking up from a dream. It took Regulus a moment to forget about Snape and turn his attention towards Pandora. He shook his head, “why are you talking to that blood traitor?”

Pandora pursed her lips before she continued, “Cheryl heard from Emilia Tonks-”

Regulus raised his eyebrows, suddenly sitting up very tall.

“Yes, your cousins’ sister-in-law,” Pandora waved her hand, “ anyway , Selena told Emilia that she apparently has some grand plan to make a move on Sirius tonight after the Quidditch tryouts.”

So Regulus had heard.

He scoffed, “that’s crazy. Sirius isn’t going to waste his time with her . I don’t even think Sirius likes girls.”

It was Pandora’s turn to raise a brow.

“That’s not what I mean. He just never talks about girls. Well, except you and that was only when he was trying to get me to talk to you. Sirius probably still thinks girls have cooties.”

“Do you think girls have cooties?”

“I know girls have cooties,” Regulus spoke with great seriousness, but Pandora knew he was joking.

Blush rose to Pandora’s cheeks, “so do you want to hear about Selena’s great plan or what?”

“Of course I do,” Regulus took a bite of his sandwich.

How could I not?

“Selena is fairly certain Sirius is going to make the team. When he does, he’s going to make a right show of it. With it being his birthday as well, Sirius will be in high spirits. Since it’s a Friday, the all-house common room will be open late and this is where Sirius is supposedly having his birthday party.”

Regulus did not get an invitation to that.

“From what I’ve heard, it’s a small and informal party. Of course being in the all-house common room essentially opens it up for everyone to go, so I’m not even sure if Selena was properly invited.”

Probably not.

“So she’s going to talk him up, really stroke his ego. Bat her eyelashes and tell him how spectacular he was on his broom and how she just knew he’d make the Quidditch team. Selena is quite pretty, so I can imagine this working out well for her. You know how she’s really into muggle things, so she’s gotten him these things called party snaps. They’re quite like fireworks, but very small. You throw them and they apparently pop real loud and scare the robes off of everyone within earshot.

“See, she’s playing into Sirius’ interests, probably hoping to get in on one of Sirius’ pranks. After she’s made herself pretty, praised him, and given him this wonderful gift, she’s going to ask him to walk her back to the dungeons. He’s a gentleman right? He won’t say no. And that’s when she kisses him. Full on the mouth, with nobody around, and all the privacy in the castle.”

Regulus grimaced, “do you think that’ll work?”

Pandora shrugged, “Selena certainly thinks it will.”

For the remainder of lunch, Regulus couldn’t get the image of Selena snogging his brother out of his head. He didn’t want the image there. Who in their right mind would? He just couldn’t help it. In the brief time Regulus had been at Hogwarts, it became quite clear to him how popular his brother had become in just his first year. All of Hogwarts knew his name. Sirius Black was a daring, handsome, trouble-maker, with a knack for Transfiguration, Charms, and Flying. He and his friends had been taken under the wings of the Prewett twins, thus furthering Sirius’ fame. There was hardly a student in the castle who didn’t wish they were him - and if they didn’t, they either hated him or loved him. There was no in between. 

Somehow Regulus managed to do all three.

The small wooden stands around the training grounds were filled to the brim. An overflow of students found themselves sprawled out over picnic blankets on the sidelines of the field. While the sun thankfully shined bright over Hogwarts, it was still bitter cold out. In the top row of the stands, Regulus found himself snuggled tight between Robin and Pandora, with Evan and Barty at his feet. They were all dressed in large winter robes, and wool Slytherin hats and scarves. Trying out for the first time for Slytherin were second years Duncan Ashe and Severus Snape, along with third year Lucinda Talkalot. Both A and B teams were quite established from the year prior, as only two students had graduated. 

To begin tryouts, students from all the houses who were trying out of the first time were to run drills against each other. It wouldn’t have been fair to immediately send them off against the seventh year students who were years ahead in talent and experience. So the three Slytherins marched onto the field, quickly realizing they were greatly outnumbered by the other houses. Gryffindor had a total of five students trying out, while Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw put up six more students combined. The numbers made for a perfect match, seven on seven. 

Madam Hooch approached the center of the field, the case which carried the various Quidditch balls floated along behind her. 

“In order to make this fair, I will be splitting you all up into two teams,” Hooch then began shuffling the students around and placing them on opposite sides of a painted white line in the grass. The crowd watched intensely, waiting to see the final line up of the young Quidditch hopefuls. A deep satisfaction ran through Regulus as he watched his brother be separated from Potter. It was almost pitiful really. One team showcased Potter, Longbottom, McKinnon, Laughalot, a Hufflepuff, and two Ravenclaws. While the other had Sirius, Severus, Duncan, Katie Carter from Gryffindor, and the remaining members of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. Regulus wasn’t sure what would have been worse, pairing Snape with Potter or with Sirius. It was clear how Snape loathed the two Gryffindors and the feelings seemed to be mutual.  

Into the air the students rose, perched on their newly polished and trimmed broomsticks. Their robes transfigured into orange and purple, as not to show any house bias. With ease, every student completed Hooch’s drills. Well, everyone except Snape. Why is he even trying out? He was awful. Truly awful. It hurt to watch as he smacked into his teammates, got hit with bludger after bludger, and missed every save at the goal post. Everyone else was quite impressive, though. Having practiced in each position, they all did surprisingly well, though it was quite clear who had been yearning for what position. Sirius was clearly a beater, though not even Regulus could deny his brother’s speed as he trailed behind James in the chaser obstacles. When it came to Severus… maybe he was trying out for Seeker? He was fast, no doubt. Just not exactly agile. 

“Oi, Snivellus!”  Sirius’ voice rang out.

Oh, Merlin. Regulus buried his head in his hands at his brother’s impudence.

“The weight of your big nose is throwing off the balance of your broom!”

At the bottom of the stands, Regulus caught sight of Lily elbowing Pettigrew as the boy snickered at the joke. Both Regulus and Lily looked back up just in time to see Severus whip out his wand and point it right at Sirius.

“Shut your blood-traitor mouth, Black! Or maybe I should do it for you. Oscausi !”

As Snape fired his spell, an audible gasp came from the crowd below. The force of Snape’s wand waving and his lack of flying skills caused him to swerve slightly left. The charm missed Sirius completely, instead it hit Potter who was right behind him. That didn’t stop Severus. He steadied his broom and raised his wand once more.

“ Flipendo !”

Well, Snape never missed twice. He sent Sirius straight off his broom. Fortunately, he’d only been about four meters off the ground. The fall could have been much worse. That didn’t stop Regulus from instinctively running down the stands to meet his brother who was sprawled out on the grass. No sooner had Regulus gotten onto the field, Selena and Lupin were right there on either side of him. Sirius groaned, clutching his shoulder, as he rolled on the ground.

“Sirius, are you okay?” Lupin and Selena both asked at the same time, then exchanged horrified looks at one another.

“Who the hell are you?” Lupin asked Selena, brows knit. 

She crossed her arms defensively, “none of your business,” Selena popped her gum and then threw her hair over her shoulder as she made her way back into the stands.

Regulus rolled his eyes. The nerve of some people.

Kneeling down into the grass, Regulus reached out for his brother’s arm. Sirius recoiled at the touch.

“It’s just me, you big pratt,” Regulus sighed.

Sirius groaned again, “I think it’s broken - my shoulder.”

Sirius removed his hand from his shoulder. Sure enough, a bit of white bone was sticking straight out from Sirius’ undershirt. Regulus and Lupin both jumped back in surprise and a bit of disgust. It was a clean break, but totally nasty. The image was forever burned into Regulus’ mind. Lupin, however, seemed quite unbothered after the initial shock.

“Ah, rub some dirt on it, mate,” Lupin chuckled softly and then reached into his pocket.

Half a chocolate bar, carefully wrapped up, had been procured. Lupin extended the candy to Sirius, who took it gratefully with his free hand. Hooch’s whistle sounded, causing the rest of the students to land their brooms. Slughorn and McGonagall were quick to rush out onto the field. Potter, who’s affliction had quickly been reversed by McGonagall, was soon met by a teary eyed Lily. More concerned with the bone sticking out of his brother’s shoulder, Regulus didn’t hear the conversation between James and Lily. In the distance, Regulus heard a very angry Professor Slughorn mention detention and the loss of house points, but that wasn’t a priority at the moment. Sirius was quickly becoming pale, the shock of the broken bone was quite overwhelming. From the corner of his eye, Sirius could see the break. He couldn’t help but look.

McGonagall was now looming over the boys, “Sirius, can you stand?”

“I think he’s going into shock, Professor,” Remus was beginning to lose his calm. 

With a sudden burst of adrenaline, Regulus shot to his feet, “I’ll get Madam Pomfrey.”

Regulus had never run so fast in his life.

With almost all the students out on the training grounds, the halls were empty. Regulus steps echoed in the long corridors and portraits yelled at him to stop running. He didn’t hear them. Of course the hospital wing was across the suspension bridge. You’d think they’d have put it closer to the pitch . Madam Pomfrey was startled by Regulus’ abrupt entrance, the doors smacking against the opposite walls. 

“Mr. Black! What’s all the fuss?” the young woman clutched her chest.

Regulus panted, “Sirius - shoulder - broken - right out of his skin.”

Saying the words out loud caused the color to drain from his face.

“Oh dear, no time to lose,” Promfrey gathered her wand and medical bag and ran out the door almost as quickly as Regulus had entered.

With a deflated sigh, Regulus turned on his heel and began jogging after the nurse. When they returned to the training grounds, most of the students had scattered. Those who remained were the students trying out and those who were already on their respective teams. They were simply waiting for Sirius to be removed from the field; of course, tryouts had to go on. After a quick examination, Madam Pomfrey removed a small stretcher from her bag then enlarged it with a simple swish of her wand. It seemed Sirius had passed out in Regulus’ absence, as he didn’t groan or make any resistance as Pomfrey levitated the boy onto the stretcher and commanded it to carry him through the castle.

Unable to move, Regulus could only watch as the stretcher carrying his brother floated into the castle and out of sight. He wasn’t sure whether to be upset or worried. Perhaps anxious was the right emotion. Sirius had gotten into many scraps before, he’d even been cursed, but Regulus had never seen him unconscious like that before. Devoid of color and lifeless. Maybe it was easier to pretend he’d been asleep. But Regulus had watched him fall and had seen the bone protruding from the skin. Merlin, that must have hurt . Aside from the single slap he received from his mother all those months ago, Regulus had never truly been injured before. He’d never broken a bone or twisted an ankle. He was a careful and meticulous child; never running too fast or climbing too high. Regulus’ pain tolerance had never been truly tested before. It was extremely difficult to put himself in Sirius’ shoes.

Lost in thought, Regulus jumped at the sensation of a hand being placed on his shoulder. He looked up to find Professor McGonagall staring down at him with the most sober expression. Without speaking, the witch guided Regulus back into the castle. The whistle which resumed Quidditch tryouts sounded behind them. Though very much worried about Sirius’ condition, Regulus couldn’t help the small feeling of satisfaction rising within him. Sirius was always so full of himself. Getting into trouble, showing off, acting like he was better than everyone else. A part of Regulus began to believe Sirius had deserved such an unfortunate fate. Quidditch tryouts, the day Sirius had been anticipating for so long, was continuing without him. Not to mention on his birthday of all days. Regulus snorted at his brother’s misfortune. 

“What was that, dear?” McGonagall bowed her head to get a good look at Regulus.

He faked a sniffle and stuck out his lip, “I’m just really worried about Sirius, Professor.”

McGonagall wrapped an arm around his shoulders as they continued to walk, “no need to fret, Regulus. Your brother is in the best possible care. Madam Pomfrey will have him good as new in no time.”

Regulus hadn’t a doubt that Sirius would be okay. Physically at least. Whether or not Sirius recovered from the ordeal emotionally was another issue. That was something Regulus could understand, but he didn’t allow his mind to go there. Instead he mused over the fact that if his brother wasn’t such a bully and hadn’t instigated Snape, he’d still be flying about the training grounds. Regulus concluded that Sirius had only himself to blame. Now he had to wait another whole year to try out again. There’d be no claim to fame until then and his ego would have no choice but to suffer.

To Regulus’ dismay, he had been so completely wrong. That night at dinner, Sirius’ fan base had grown extraordinarily large.

“Sirius, you’re so brave!”

“Sirius, you’re so strong!”

“Sirius, let me sign your bandages!”

The girls wouldn’t shut up.

Then the Quidditch captains from each house approached the head table and announced those who had made the teams. Nobody expected Sirius to have made it, but somehow he proved everyone wrong.

Gideon Prewett took the stage, “Potter, A team chaser.”

The room applauded and cheered.

“McKinnon, B team chaser. Carter, B team seeker. Longbottom, A team keeper. Black-”

The room fell silent with anticipation.

“B team beater.”

Oh, for Merlin’s sake!

Regulus looked at Snape, with an expression which read are you happy now? Severus had successfully made Sirius a Quidditch martyr.

Chapter Text

Not even a broken bone can stop Sirius Black from having a good time. Though Madam Pomfrey had successfully put the bone back in place and mended the skin around it, Sirius was still quite sore and the break needed a full day to properly mend. After dinner, Regulus sat alongside Cissy to write to his mother. When Regulus had gone for Madam Pomfrey, Cissy pleaded with McGonagall to allow her to inform Walburga of the incident. Knowing full well the wrath of Walburga Black would have reigned down upon Hogwarts upon discovering her heir was properly injured during Quidditch tryouts, Cissy believed it best for the news to come from her only after Sirius had been cleared. Quite right. 

The letter began with declaring Sirius was in good health and then the details were clearly laid out. Omitting Severus’ name from the document was a good call. Not that Walburga would care (honestly, she probably would have been more upset that Sirius hadn’t made A team), Cissy included that even with his injuries, Sirius had still made the Quidditch team. At the bottom of the letter there was just enough room for Regulus to leave his own note, promising he was in good health and receiving perfect marks in his classes. Perhaps that would ease Walburga’s mind. Narcissa sent the letter off with a nervous glint in her eyes. Though as strong as she was, Walburga was still quite intimidating. 

On their way back from the owlery, Regulus and Narcissa crossed paths with their most favorite trouble maker. Sirius and his friends looked giddy and eager as they walked across the quad. During dinner, whispers confirmed that Sirius’ birthday party was still on. It seemed that’s where the four young Gryffindors were headed, with bags full of goodies and dressed in fine, but casual muggle attire. Sirius met Regulus’ eye with a weary look. The other boys slowed as they approached the Black cousins. Sensing the brothers’ tensional draw to one another, Narcissa ruffled Regulus’ hair then marched firmly on ahead. 

The boys met at the center of the quad. Silence gathered about them as Regulus examined the bandages on his brothers’ shoulder, unable to rid his mind of the image of the injury. The sun had long set behind the mountains and a cold breeze rustled the bare branches of the trees which dotted the courtyard. It was Lupin who spoke first.

“Alright, Reg,” the tall gangly boy nodded at Regulus then looked to Sirius, “your brother went running to get Pomfrey after your accident. Record time might I add.”

Sirius looked Regulus up and down, quite skeptical until he broke out into a wide toothy grin. Then he did something truly unexpected. With his undamaged arm, Sirius wrapped Regulus into a tight embrace. The brotherly affection was something neither of them had engaged in since Sirius had gotten off the Hogwarts Express back in June. With just the slightest touch, all the anger and resentment and loneliness Regulus had been building up since their arrival at Hogwarts melted away. 

“Thank you, Reggie,” Sirius spoke softly into his brother’s shoulder, hardly audible.

Regulus pulled back, “congrats on making the team.”

The other boys couldn’t contain their giggles and Sirius snorted, “bloody B team. But I guess it’s better than nothing, yeah?”

“How are you going to get Snape back this time?”

“Don’t you worry your precious little mind about that,” Sirius winked, “I promise to keep you and your lot out of it.”

Potter popped up from behind Sirius, “care for a party, Reggie?”

Now, this felt like a pity invitation. Only after Regulus had helped in aiding Sirius, was he invited to his own brother’s birthday party. He bit his lip cautiously. However, since the idea had been presented, Sirius wouldn’t have no for an answer. The boy's eyes grew bright and hopeful.

“Reggie, you have to come. Invite all your little Slytherins, yeah? Just not Avery,” Sirius paused for a moment, “or Umbridge.”

All the boys shuttered at the girl’s name.

“Well, I’ll ask, but I can’t make any promises.”

Regulus had no interest in attending Sirius’ birthday. 

“Great, we’ll see you in an hour,” Sirius patted Regulus on the back and then they were off.

***

“We are not going to his party,” Regulus groaned.

Robin and Pandora had both followed Regulus from the common room into his dorm with their hands clasped together, begging to join him at Sirius’ birthday party. He had made the mistake of telling them where he’d gone after dinner and the conversation had led the girls to suddenly wanting to attend. Regulus entered the bathroom, ignoring the girls as they flopped down on his bed and began petting Karasi. He slammed the door behind him.

“We’ve been invited now, we can go and it won’t be weird at all!” Pandora announced.

“It was a pity invite!” Regulus turned on the faucet just to drown them out.

Regulus loosened his tie and haphazardly ran his fingers through his hair, unsettling his perfectly placed curls. He hadn’t meant to tell them he’d bumped into Sirius at all, it just kind of came fumbling out. Regulus was still a bit shocked by his brother’s show of affection.

Robin’s soft voice could be heard just on the other side of the door, “Regulus, it could be quite fun. Please, just for a little while?”

The girl’s plea pulled at Regulus’ heart. Shutting off the water, he quickly turned to open the door. Regulus came face to face with Robin’s big, round glasses. He cleared his throat.

“Yes, fine. We can go.”

Robin and Pandora squealed, clapping their hands together. Then curtain around Evan’s bed parted, the boy poked his head out with a goofy grin breaking out across his lips.

“Where are we going?”

Regulus palmed his forehead. Well, if I go, I might as well take everyone.

“Ten minutes, meet in the common room.”

The girls rushed out in a hurry. Regulus couldn’t believe they so easily swayed him. There would be nothing there for them - just a couple of baby Slytherins at the blood traitor festival. Why would they even want to go? Even Crouch and Rosier, who had overheard the conversation, were suddenly interested in going. The three boys quickly changed from their school robes to casual trousers and sweaters. 

Regulus couldn’t help but ask, “why do you lot even want to go?”

Evan scoffed, “I may not be the biggest fan of your brother and his friends, but there’s one thing even I can’t deny.”

“Go on.”

“They’ve all got quite the way with witches,” Barty winked.

Regulus groaned. So his friends were just using him to get to girls. That certainly didn’t make him feel spectacular about himself.

Evan put a hand on Regulus’ shoulder, “ah, chin up, mate. It’s going to be fun!”

Regulus sighed, “yeah, sure.”

Out in the common room, the boys found Robin and Pandora dressed in the modern muggle fashion. Corduroy skirts and colorful turtlenecks. They had swapped out their fine silks, long skirts, and glamorous dresses for shabby and boring everyday wear.

“Where did you get muggle clothes?”

Regulus’ disgust was evident. So much so that Evan and Barty were slightly taken aback by his crudeness. The girls exchanged a look and then pulled at the hems of their sleeves anxiously. Pandora’s hair began to fade a bit blue. Oh, he’d done it now.

“Nevermind, we’re going to be late. Let’s go.”

So they went, traveling briskly through the halls towards the North tower. Why the all-house common room had to be on the complete opposite side of the castle rather than in the middle (where it would make sense) was a mystery to all. It was unusually cold out for early November and the small group of Slytherins had to cross the quad, the suspension bridge, and the middle courtyard. There were quite a few students milling about; older students chasing after their friends and the whispers of who kissed who could be heard as Regulus passed by. Hormones were just as strong as some magic it seemed. It appeared that everyone was obsessed with snogging the closest living thing they could find. Regulus couldn’t help but feel embarrassed by everyone’s need to get out of their pants and into someone else’s.

Fortunately, his friends weren’t nearly as bad as the older students he’d constantly overhear. Evan and Barty were incredibly awkward. They just liked girls and liked talking about them, which was fine and innocent enough. When it came to it, they were hopeless at speaking to any girl outside of their year. Scratch that. They could only speak to the girls within their year within their own house. For Robin and Pandora, it was pretty much the same. Merlin forbid they have to share a cauldron with one of the Gryffindor boys. They completely freeze up! Regulus always felt a bit of smugness when other boys would try to speak to Pandora and get absolutely nowhere. Then he’d immediately become quite ashamed and sweaty at the reminder of Pandora’s true feelings towards him. That was still something they refused to speak about. 

At the top of the North tower there was a large portrait of Merlin himself. Beyond the portrait was the all-house common room. Due to its location, the room was often not in use. Mainly students who had most of their classes on that side of the castle would use it to study in between classes. Other than that, it laid mostly empty throughout the year. The North tower looked out of the training grounds and the Quidditch pitch, with a grand view of the forest and the mountains beyond. Its floor to ceiling windows helped in giving the students such a view. Inside the common room were plenty of old sofas and chairs, all taken from each of the houses to provide a mix of red, yellow, green, and blue. Even the carpets and drapes were a patchwork of the various house colors. Perhaps the most extraordinary thing within the all-house common room was the last living portrait of all four founders. It hung just above the fireplace. They were sitting together out on the field along the lake, so young and happy. The best of friends. The portrait was done just before Hogwarts had opened. 

The way to enter the all-house common room was quite silly. Perhaps that was because Merlin, unbeknownst to most, was actually quite the prankster during his time at Hogwarts. To any student wishing to enter the room, Merlin requested a joke to be shared. Regulus was not interested in telling jokes. He wasn’t even interested in being at that party, but there he was trying to get in and out with great effort. 

“Anyone have a joke?” he turned to ask those around him.

Everyone shrugged.

“Does it have to be a joke or can I just do something funny?” Pandora asked.

Merlin’s portrait lit up, delighted by the proposition. 

“Dear girl, I am quite intrigued by your question!” Merlin mused, “please, bestow upon me your comedic trick.”

With great concentration, Pandora managed to turn herself into Merlin’s mirror image. Beard and all. Regulus, Evan, and Barty all jumped back in surprise while Robin laughed behind the cover of her hand. Everyday, Pandora surprised them with her abilities and how far she’d come in controlling them. Captivated, Merlin graciously opened the portrait to the first year Slytherins. 

Merlin’s repeated “well done, well done,” could still be heard as they entered the short corridor into the common room. 

The burst of laughter which came from Regulus could not be helped. Sirius had out done himself. All the furniture was floating. Any object not attached to the walls or the floors moved throughout the air without friction. The students who were already there swam freely through the atmosphere within the room. Music was blaring from a nearby record player, seemingly charmed to stay firmly on the floor. The moment Regulus exited the corridor, he began floating upwards. Sirius and his friends had somehow managed to remove the gravity within the common room. 

It was incredible and insane. There weren’t really many other words to describe being weightless. It was a bit like being in water, but much less physically demanding or wet. Regulus couldn’t help but to indulge on the impulse to flip and roll and perform all types of tricks that he wouldn’t be able to accomplish successfully on the ground. If every student knew about this, the room would be too full to move, Regulus was sure of it. So far, it seemed that only the Gryffindors had arrived so far. Meaning Regulus and his friends were an obvious and unwelcome arrival. 

“You came!” Sirius was performing a backstroke across the common room.

This was quite the site, as Sirius had only one mobile arm. He swam through the air, verging slightly left. Everyone was looking at them and Regulus was mortified. He should never have come. 

“Erm, happy birthday, S.” 

Regulus could feel the heat growing in his cheeks. 

“Who’ve you brought along?” Sirius looked over his brother’s shoulder, “Evan and Barty, yeah?”

The two boys grunted in agreement and nodded. Bless Sirius’ heart, he was so earnest and ready to befriend everyone. Regulus almost felt bad for him. Almost.

Sirius used his free hand to push his way around Regulus, “ah, the lovely Pandora Burke,” Sirius bowed right into a front flip.

“And who may you be?” Sirius turned towards Robin.

He knew damn well who she was. Sirius knew who everyone was. Just as everyone knew who Sirius was, whether for better or for worse. 

Robin pushed up her glasses, “Mulciber. Robin, Mulciber,” she was hardly audible.

“Come again?” Sirius tilted an ear towards her.

If it were possible to roll your eyes into the back of your head, Regulus would have already done so.

Robin cleared her throat and spoke only slightly louder, “Robin Mulciber.”

“Well, Robin Mulciber, it’s a pleasure to have you,” Sirius took her hand and kissed it.

Egh!

Robin and Pandora both blushed at Sirius’ bold action, so did many other girls floating close by. 

“So anyway,” Regulus pushed himself in front of Sirius, “care to introduce us to everyone else?”

He grimaced as soon as the words left his mouth. Why? Why? Why? Before he knew it, Regulus was being pulled into a crowd of Gryffindors. He was formally introduced to Frank Longbottom, whom he remembered from Quiddtich tryouts. The Gryffindor girls seemed unusually interested in Regulus. 

“Severus told me all about you!” Lily Evans was an unusually pleasant girl.

“He did?”

“Yeah, you’re brilliant. Charms right?”

Regulus hesitated, “among other things, yes.”

“He’s so mysterious,” Mary MacDonald was whispering not so quietly to Marlene McKinnon, “he’s like the cooler version of Sirius.”

McKinnon laughed at her friend’s assertion. 

Katie Carter and Bianca Belby took it upon themselves to discuss Quidditch with Regulus. While he loved the sport, he did not want to be discussing it with them.

“Excuse me,” he cut Katie off mid speech on the history of the golden snitch.

Regulus breast stroked his way across the common room. The lack of gravity was becoming a bit annoying. It lost its novelty all too quickly. Evan and Barty were attempting to play some form of anti-gravity gobstones, but the liquid which came from them hung in puddles in the air. It smelled absolutely putrid. 

“What are you guys doing?”

“Playing gobstones,” Evan then took a large bite out of a slice of chocolate cake which hung next to his head.

“I gathered.”

“Your brother throws a great party,” Barty completed his 500th front flip.

Clearly the anti-gravity had not lost its novelty on Barty. 

“Where are Pandora and Robin?”

“With the Ravenclaws,” Evan mumbled through the cake.

Above them were various hula hoops spread about to form a sort of obstacle course. Pandora and Robin were racing through the hoops alongside two Ravenclaw blokes. Regulus knew them well. Quirinus Quirrell and Xenophilius Lovegood. Never again would Regulus pity himself for the name his parents chose for him. Regulus paddled his way up to them.

“B-B-Black, how-how are you?”

“Splendid,” Regulus turned to his friends, “ready to go?”

Pandora furrowed her brows, “Reggie, there’s still an hour till curfew.”

“I’m just getting a bit tired of all this air swimming, you know?”

“We’re having a great time!” Robin spun through one of the hoops.

“Lovegood was just telling us about his family’s magazine The Quibbler ,” Pandora added, attempting to bring Regulus into the conversation.

“I heard there’s a Crumple-Horned Snorkack in Hogsmeade. I can’t wait until we’re allowed privileges to enter the village, so that I may find one in the flesh!” Lovegood’s wide blue eyes resembled those of a child who had far too many sugar quills.

“Yeah… okay,” Regulus shifted away from the boy. 

“ Reggie !” Sirius’ piercing voice came from across the common room.

What now?

“Reggie, look! We’re having a weight lifting competition, come join us!”

Sure enough, Sirius was holding 22 kilogram dumbbells in each hand, lifting one high above his head. Potter was beside him balancing multiple weights on the tip of his pinky finger. The most comical sight was Lupin floating horizontally above his friends, bench pressing Pettigrew. It was difficult for Regulus to suppress a muffled laugh.

Before Regulus could make his way over, Selena was suddenly blocking his path to Sirius. With a hand on Sirius’ good shoulder, she whispered something in his ear which caused the boy to blush. Sirius was not one to blush so easily. He turned to James who nodded encouragingly and then he was off with Selena in tow. 

“Where’s he off to?” Regulus asked James once he finally made his way across - his arms were aching.

“Walking Selena back to the dungeons.”

“Alright, I’m leaving.”

Regulus began to push his way back towards the floor as James called after him. He didn’t even stop to think that his friends were still there, enjoying the party without him. He also hadn’t stopped to think he’d stumbleupon Sirius and Selena snogging. Which he did. The two were latched onto each other like leeches in the center of the courtyard. In that moment, Regulus longed for the weightlessness of the all-house common room, for a heavy and solid form took hold within his chest. There was only one word to describe such a feeling. The ache and the pull which made him dizzy and nauseous could be nothing other than betrayal. The same betrayal as when Regulus learned Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor. The same as when Regulus saw Sirius and his friends exit the Hogwarts express for the first time. The same as when Regulus beat on Sirius after he made fun of Pandora. It just never stopped. Sirius never stopped.

Regulus wiped the tears from his cheeks and turned to walk the long way around the Transfiguration corridor. Yes, Regulus felt betrayed. What he didn’t know then, as he ran through the dark halls alone, was that there was also a pang of jealousy. A deep rooted jealousy that would never really go away. It would always be there, behind every decision Regulus would ever make, motivating him as well as holding him back. Jealousy and betrayal were simply the way of the Noble House of Black. There was no reason to feel as if anything were amiss, for that is exactly how Regulus would remain for the rest of his days.

Chapter Text

November 25, 1972

Regulus’ first term at Hogwarts seemed to never end. It was as if time were passing at an inexplicably slow rate. The few papers he had been assigned took no time at all to complete, so he simply waited for the next assignment to be dished out. Every day was the same, leaving Regulus with a dull and vacant stare in each class. With each day that passed, he gradually got closer and closer to returning to Grimmauld Place. He knew students could spend the winter holiday at Hogwarts, but Walburga would never allow it. Regulus knew better than to even ask. So, the inevitable anxiety and dread built up in him as the term came closer and closer to its end.

Only three weeks after Quidditch tryouts came Slytherin’s first match against Ravenclaw. Finally, Regulus had a reason to feel something other than empty and depraved of joy (which he had been since Sirius’ party). Regulus thought he knew his cousin well enough, but he’d never seen Cissy before Quidditch. She was raving mad. For a week she had hardly eaten, hardly slept, and had the Slytherins up at six in the morning every day for practice. On top of all that, she began running laps around the castle on her own after supper. Anyone who dared to get in her way was given detention on the spot - this really only turned out badly for Dolores. 

On the morning of the first match, Narcissa was visibly shaking at breakfast. Her team, all matching in dark green jumpers with their numbers on the back, sat around her at the head of the table. Everyone was eating, except Cissy. She held a small cup of tea in both her hands, with her elbows perched up on the table. Her platinum blonde hair was in a long plait which draped over her shoulder. Hey gray eyes seemed to be elsewhere. 

“You reckon she makes it through breakfast?” Evan raised a skeptical brow.

Barty let out a long sigh and rubbed his temple, “Merlin, I hope so.”

“One of her roommates, Astrid Snyde, said she was talking in her sleep all night . Babbling on about different plays and repeating ‘ gotta get the snitch, gotta get the snitch ,’” there was a hint of worry in Pandora’s tone.

Reaching across the table for another slice of toast, Robin asked, “maybe you could morph into her again and play in her place?”

The small group of Slytherins burst into a fit of anxious laughter. Even if Pandora could do that, she was rubbish on a broom. Slowly, they all leaned their heads forwards to get a good look at Narcissa. She had stopped shaking, which was a good sign. Though, her face was stern and her focus was far beyond the Great Hall. No sooner had they all peered over at her, the tea cup in her hands shattered. Narcissa had hardly acknowledged her actions, while the rest of the team were all clamoring to clean up the mess. Regulus followed her stare across to the Ravenclaw table. Ah. Siobhan Davies, sixth year and Ravenclaw seeker, was seated directly in Cissy’s line of vision. 

“Reg? Reggie!” a hand on Regulus’ shoulder shook him from his trance. 

He blinked a few times before his eyes settled on Pandora.

“Are you ready to go?” Pandora’s eyes narrowed.

“Yeah we need to get good seats!” Evan added, unaware of Regulus’ momentary lapse of awareness. 

He nodded silently and followed his friends out of the Great Hall. What nobody else knew, save for perhaps Lucius, is that Narcissa received a particularly nasty reply back from Walburga after Sirius’ accident. Walburga blamed Narcissa, as it was a younger Slytherin who had injured Sirius, which meant Narcissa wasn’t living up to her perfect duties. According to Walburga, of course. It seemed Walburga was more infuriated by Snape calling her heir a blood-traitor, rather than him breaking her son’s bones. It all happened so publicly, that it would surely bring shame upon their family. The witnesses would go writing off to their parents about how the Black heir was a disgrace to his name. The Dark Lord would hear about this and become suspicious. Then Walburga and Orion would have to face his questioning and ridicule. All because Narcissa couldn’t keep her students in line. It was complete bollocks. 

After sharing the letter’s contents with Regulus, Narcissa promptly threw it in the common room fire. At the moment, it seemed like Walburga was just being overdramatic. Though, as the term dragged on and Christmas drew nearer, Cissy was just as on edge as Regulus. It didn’t matter that neither of them hadn’t committed any “crimes” against their name, but their parents would surely see it that way. Even though they both knew Walburga didn’t care one bit about Sirius’ wellbeing behind closed doors, there was still an image to maintain. 

Since Sirius’ birthday, Regulus had made every attempt to avoid his brother. He stayed out of the library where he knew Sirius would be after classes. Regulus didn’t dare go back to the all-house common room, he ate most of his meals as quickly as possible, and memorized Sirius’ schedule so as to avoid him in the halls. It wasn’t easy though, Sirius was constantly popping up. Not to mention on Tuesdays and Thursdays Regulus would be leaving Charms as the second year Gryffindors would be coming in. Fortunately, he had flying after Charms and would hastily exit the castle before Sirius and his band of misfits came strutting down the corridor. 

The thought of Sirius always led Regulus’ mind to the kiss he shared with Selena. It was always present, at the back of his mind, waiting to crawl to the front and make him miserable. It was on loop every single day. The way the moonlight shone on only them in the center of the courtyard. Selena’s hands tangled in Sirius’ long hair. How his brother was just ever so slightly holding on to the older girl’s waist. The worst part was the sound of their echoed hum as their lips met over and over again. It was insufferable. 

This image plagued Regulus’ mind all the way to the Quidditch pitch.

Up in the Slytherin stands, Regulus took his seat between Pandora and Evan. Perhaps he should have sat on the far end, away from the other boys, as Evan and Barty had woken up at dawn to paint their faces green and silver and were already practicing their chants for the match. They were the only students there. There weren’t even any professors, not even Hooch. So the five young Slytherins were able to claim their spot in the front row, with an insane view of the pitch. The sun was out, but there were clouds in the distance slowly moving in. It was freezing out and smelled like snow. The night before, Regulus had placed a self-heating charm on his winter robe, keeping him nice and toasty while seated high up in the stands. 

While Regulus was excited for the match, he couldn’t bring himself to paint his face. Barty and Evan did offer, though. He just didn’t have the energy. His nightmares were perpetuating his fatigue and the ever present sense of doom and dread completely overwhelmed him. It was easier to not give into the normal fun and hijinks of other boys. If Regulus had actually tried to participate in Barty and Evan’s games, he’d only bring them down. So he opted to keep to himself and that worked for everyone, as long as he played nice and showed up every now and then.

Silently, Regulus looked out beyond the Quidditch pitch, past the lake, and settled his eyes on the mountains which looked like painted shadows on the sky. To his right, Pandora and Robin chatted quietly about their upcoming History of Magic assignment where they had been grouped up with Dolores and some random Hufflepuff. To his left, Barty and Evan were scribbling down punny insults to yell at the Ravenclaw team. Being surrounded by other children for the past few months caused Regulus to lose many of the formal habits Walburga worked so diligently to instill in him. Regulus slouched his shoulders, never bothered to take the wrinkles out of his robes, and wore his hair longer than ever before. He still kept quiet, perhaps even more quiet than he had been at Grimmauld Place. Some aspects of his appearance were kept neat; he did well to keep himself clean and his laundry was never dirty. Unfortunately he’d grown frighteningly thin as he grew taller. He ate at every single meal, and always kept full, but somehow he just couldn’t keep the weight on. His cheekbones were sharp and his eyes were still sunken in a deep purple halo. Regulus looked perpetually exhausted. He felt perpetually exhausted, too. 

Time passed and slowly other students began filling the stands. There was a distinct lack of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs in attendance, but their Quidditch teams were present and ready to scope out the competition. The Slytherin and Ravenclaw teams made their way onto the field, very obviously ignoring each other. They ran their drills as normal, chasers practicing on their keepers and beaters batting back and forth. Narcissa, alone on her broom and perched way up high above everyone else, was moving astonishingly fast. She sprinted, dove, and rolled through the air like a Peruvian Vipertooth. Regulus gazed up at his cousin, his eyes wide and full of wonder and pride. Cissy was graceful and quick, but dangerous and sneaky. There was a reason she’d been voted captain as a fifth year and Regulus would soon find out why.

The whistle blew and all the players flew down to the field. The teams lined up, face to face with their opposing player. Too quiet for those in the stands to hear, Hooch gave her usual speech to the teams, encouraging them to play fair. Everyone in the stands remained absolutely silent as they awaited the announcer, Patricia Rakepick, to begin.

“Good morning, Hogwarts!” Rakepick’s gravelly voice boomed across the pitch.

“It is a lovely day out for the opening match of the 1972-73 season, though I do see some clouds rolling in. Today we the ambitious Slytherins-” 

Cheers rang out across the green flagged towers.

“against the clever Ravenclaws.”

Evan and Barty booed loudly against the Ravenclaw’s cheers. 

“First we have the starting line up for the Slytherins. Number seven, sixth year prefect, two time captain, and previous Quidditch House Cup champion; your seeker - Narcissa Malfoy !”

Regulus clapped vigorously for his cousin.

The rosters were read out, with each Ravenclaw receiving a proper boo by the Slytherins after each of their names were called. Then Ravenclaw won the Galleon toss, claiming the quaffle for themselves. Not before long, the players were in the air. The Ravenclaw chasers, Bagby, Belby, and Green passed back and forth with ease as they weaved around defending Slytherins and dodged oncoming bludgers. Thomas Bagby approached the hoops with alarming speed. But Lucius was faster. 

While the quaffle is passed between the Slytherin chasers, Regulus is looking out for Cissy. She’s higher than she was during drills, looming over the center of the pitch. Meanwhile, Davies is just above Ravenclaw’s hoops, straining her eyes for a sign of the snitch. Neither of the girls see it, but Regulus does. It’s hovering just opposite of the Slytherin stands, blending into the gold of Gryffindor’s banners. If Regulus ever made the team, he’d stay low. There’s too much to see, too much activity and colors when searching from above. If the seeker is closer to the pitch, it’s simply easier to look up. Cissy might have been the best Slytherin seeker in decades, but Reggie knew he could be better. 

“Burke scores! Ten points to Slytherin!” Rakepick shouts into her microphone.

Pandora shot to her feet, her gloved hands cupped around her mouth as she cheered for her brother. As far as Regulus knew, the two still weren’t talking. Prometheus was avoiding Pandora just as Regulus was avoiding Sirius. When he thought about it that way, the guilt crept in. So he quickly disposed of the thought and clapped and hollered along with everyone else. Only moments after the pitch was reset, Emma Vanity intercepted a pass, snatching the quaffle right out of the air.

“This looks like a Hawkshead Attacking Formation to me!”

Sure enough, Lucinda and Prometheus were both flanking Emma, leading her to Ravenclaw’s goal post. 

“Another ten points to Slytherin! The first match of the season is starting off as fast paced as one can hope - will Ravenclaw be able to keep up?”

Ravenclaw’s keeper, Kingsley Shacklebolt, was visibly angry with the loss of two goals.

“Old man Kingsley needs to retire! Letting up a couple of goals by some kids!” Evan shouted, but was hardly heard over the cheering. Barty nodded wholeheartedly in agreement. Regulus just rolled his eyes. Kingsley wasn’t a bad keeper - actually he was quite good. Burke and Vanity were just stellar chasers and nobody could deny that. 

Suddenly, Cissy took a deep dive. Regulus looked frantically for the snitch but he couldn’t see it. Siobhan was hot on Cissy’s tail. The two spiraled down at an alarming rate. Where the hell is she going? The snitch was nowhere in sight. She’s gonna crash.

“I can’t watch this,” Regulus’ hands covered his eyes, but he peered out between the cracks.

Just before Cissy reached the ground, she pulled up. She cleared the dive, but Davies wasn’t as lucky. The tip of the girl’s broom grazed the dirt, she pulled up with far too much force and turned herself upside down. With no injury or damage to her broom, the game went on. By the time Davies had recovered from Cissy’s misleading tactic, the Slytherin seeker was already long gone. While all this was happening, Lucius became momentarily distracted, watching as Narcissa willingly plummeted. Before he knew it, Thomas Bagby had scored.

“Ravenclaw captain, Thomas Bagby, puts up the first ten points for his team!” 

Lucius steadied himself, with a stern look and his jaw clenched, he tightened the ponytail at the base of his neck. This wasn’t a particularly masculine action, but when Lucius did it Regulus couldn’t deny the fear he held for the older student. Lucius Malfoy was a force to be reckoned with. 

Rakepick spoke too soon when she stated that the match was fast paced. After Lucius let up the one goal, neither team scored for twenty minutes. Everyone watched as the quaffle went sailing back and forth. There was one exciting bit where Angelo Crabbe almost knocked Bruce Belby right off his broom, but the moment quickly passed.

“Come on, Black! Catch the snitch!” Evan yelled.

“Yeah it’s starting to snow, hurry up!” Barty added.

 Sure enough, thick flakes started to rain down upon the Quidditch pitch. It came down fast and the clouds casted a dark overcast. The spectators, as well as the players, were now struggling to see through the frozen flakes. Through the flurry, Regulus spotted Narcissa darting across the center of the pitch. She had her eyes on the snitch. Through all the snow, she actually found it.

“Yes, Cissy! Yes!” Regulus couldn’t help himself.

She was right there, Regulus spotted it now. They were going to win!

Then the bludger came out of nowhere.

Cissy went down. Hard.

“Foul! That’s a foul!” Everyone was yelling.

Lucius left his post, sprinting to where Narcissa had hit the ground. She had fallen much much further than Sirius had. From so high up in the stands and the snow blocking their view, it was difficult to assess the damage. 

Then Siobhan caught the snitch. 

The match was over. The whistle blew. Ravenclaw won. 

***

“Let me in! I need to see her!” Regulus was glaring at Madam Pomfrey, who was blocking his way to the hospital wing. 

“For the last time Mr. Black, she is resting . Narcissa explicitly stated that only Mr. Malfoy was allowed to be with her.”

“But she’s my cousin.”

“I am well aware of your relation, but my answer remains the same. If and when she changes her mind, you will be the first to know, I assure you.”

Turning on his heel, Regulus groaned and marched back down the hall.

By the time Regulus had made it down to the pitch, Narcissa was already being carried off. She had a few broken bones, no doubt. Nobody except Lucius had seen how bad it was, though. Regulus had no idea how Cissy was holding up. At the end of the hall, Regulus found Pandora where he’d left her. To his dismay, Sirius had arrived. 

“What are you doing here?” Regulus snapped.

Sirius was slightly taken aback, “did I miss something? Cissy is in the hospital, is she not?”

“She is.”

“Okay, well I’m here to see her.”

“Pomfrey says no visitors.”

"Rubbish!"

“It’s true, but you can go ask her yourself if you don’t believe me.”

“What is your problem, Reg? This attitude of yours is horrid, you’re being a massive tosser. Don’t think I haven’t noticed you avoiding me like the plague.”

“I’m the tosser?” Regulus scoffed, “Come on, Dora, let’s go.”

Sirius grabbed Regulus’ shoulder and spun him around.

“Don’t act so high and mighty, Reg. What’s going on with you?”

Regulus shook him off.

“Just leave me alone,” Regulus shoved his brother and set off down the corridor.

He could hear Pandora jogging to catch up.

“Reggie-”

“Don’t!” he shook his head, “sorry. Just- just not right now.”

The mood in the Slytherin common room was dismal. Those who hadn’t shut themselves up in their dorms were moping about. It felt like someone had died. Though, to Regulus’ shock, he spotted Robin sitting side by side to Prometheus. They were speaking in hushed tones, their heads bent together. Pandora noticed this, too. Her eyes curiously met Regulus’, wordlessly asking if they should intervene. It was indeed a most curious sight. Regulus hadn’t even realized Robin and Prometheus knew each other. Knew of each other - sure. 

Pandora was suddenly very on edge. She hadn’t spoken to her brother in months, yet there he was with her best friend. Regulus watched as her face morphed from shock to concussion to disdain. He hated to admit it, but he knew that look well. The classic mix of betrayal and jealousy. 

“Let me talk to them,” Regulus shot forward. 

The two quickly broke apart upon realizing they had company.

“Hey, Black. How’s Narcissa?” Robin pushed up her glasses, a blush rising to her cheeks.

“Pomfrey wouldn’t let me in,” he turned towards Prometheus, “Burke, nice score today.”

“Yeah, not like it mattered,” the older boy grumbled.

Regulus scratched the back of his head, “so… what’s going on?”

Perhaps he could have been a bit more smooth in his approach.

“We were just discussing our plans for the winter Holiday,” Prometheus gave a cool shrug, not meeting Reglus’ eyes.

Having just lost the first match of the season, Prometheus seemed quite at ease. His right arm was draped over the back of the sofa, with one leg across his knee. Meanwhile, Robin was sitting as straight as an arrow, with her shoulders back and her hands in her lap. It was a very odd dichotomy indeed. 

“Right. Well, I’ll let you get back to it then.” 

Robin watched Regulus back away with a nervous glint in her eyes. She seemed to want to follow him, but she didn’t. Wordlessly, Regulus and Pandora walked to his dorm room. Avery and Florian were nowhere to be found, while Barty sat at his desk, and Evan appeared to be asleep face down on his bed. 

Pandora gathered Karasi in her lap as she seated herself at the edge of Regulus’ bed.

“What’d they say?”

“Apparently they were discussing their plans for Christmas. I believe them, but I don’t think they were telling the whole truth.”

Pandora sighed, “Christmas is going to be horrid this year. Mum says we can’t go to your Christmas Eve gala and I’ll have to spend the holidays with the Weasleys! They’re having another baby, too! Due just in time for Christmas. It’s going to be absolutely mad.”

“You’re not coming to the gala?”

Pandora shook her head, “for the same reason I had to spend the summer with the Weasley’s. Mum says it’s not safe.”

Not safe? Pandora was calling Regulus’ home unsafe. Perhaps she had a point, but it still hurt. The expression which flashed across the boy’s face, caused Pandora to retract her previous statement.

“I didn’t mean it like that! Not that your home isn’t safe, just that the people who will be there aren’t safe.”

“You mean Voldemort?”

Regulus suddenly felt a strong desire to defend the Dark Lord. Sure, he was a bit extreme at times, but he was a great wizard and he believed Regulus would be, too. That was enough for Regulus.

“Among others,” Pandora’s eyes were wide and glazed over, clearly on the verge of tears.

“You don’t mean-”

Walburga. Almost a year ago, Pandora had insinuated that his mother had done something or said something that rubbed her the wrong way. It wasn’t just the Dark Lord Pandora’s mother was sheltering her from, it was Walburga, too.

“Regulus, please, I’d come if I could but I can’t. You’re my best friend, you know that. It’s just- there are things happening outside of Hogwarts. Bad things. My mother doesn’t want me to get hurt.”

Regulus snorted, rolling his eyes. Unbelievable. 

“But it’s okay if I get hurt, yeah? My mum is so horrid that no other child should have to even be in her presence for a few hours. But I get to live with her! So what, the Dark Lord, my mum, and your dad are all plotting to take control of the Wizarding world? Is that it?”

“That’s not what I said!”

“No, but it was implied.”

“Regulus-”

“Get out.”

“Regulus, please!”

“I said, get out!”

Pandora ran to the door, tears streaming down her cheeks. The door slammed behind her, promptly waking Rosier. 

“Huh? What happened?” The boy raised his head lazily, looking from Regulus to Barty.

Barty spun around in his chair, a small smirk across his lips, “Black just earned a one way ticket to Hell, compliments of Pandora.”

“Shut it, Crouch!”

Barty rolled his eyes and returned to his work.

Evan shook his head, “oh, mate, she’ll get you for that,” then fell right back asleep.

Pandora would get him back. Badly, too. But he couldn’t worry about that. He wanted to apologize as soon as she’d left the room, but he couldn’t. They both crossed a line and it was going to be a brutal journey back from that. Regulus was great at burning bridges, but not so great at building them.

Chapter Text

December 18, 1972

Pandora hasn’t spoken to anyone in a month. Not even Robin, who is understandably very distressed by this. December was miserable for everyone. A week after the match between Slytherin and Ravenclaw, Narcissa finally emerged from the hospital wing, having suffered from a concussion, fractured ribs, and a broken leg. Madam Pomfrey fixed her up good as new, but there were whispers in the corridors suggesting Cissy was not of sound mind. There were ever cruller whispers that she’d gone as mad as her eldest sister. Regulus found himself keeping a distance from Evan and Barty. It wasn’t particularly done on purpose, but the draw that had previously brought them together was no longer there. Pandora had been the glue keeping them all pals. So, Regulus and Robin worked together in almost complete silence day in and day out. They had an unspoken agreement to be partners in class and study for their midterm exams together in the library. Nobody questioned it and everybody left them alone.

Perhaps it was because they were both being shunned by Pandora, that they were brought together. Neither of them had any true friends aside from her. It only made sense that they’d fall into a pattern of emotionally leaning on one another. As the winter holiday grew nearer, the two found themselves flanked by Prometheus and Michael. First it started out with the two boys asking to sit with them in the library. What did Regulus care? So, the two agreed. The older Slytherins would occasionally whisper to one another, but neither of them spoke to the first years they often shared a table with. Robin seemed to have a strained relationship with her brother, but Regulus didn’t ask. In time, the library meetings became more frequent, then it turned into lounging in the common room together, then eventually Regulus was being asked by Prometheus to sit with them at meal times. But sitting with Prometheus meant sitting with Snape, Avery, Umbridge, and Michael. Snape and Mulciber, Regulus could handle. Avery and Umbridge, not so much. So he told the older boy he’d think about it. 

“ You want to eat dinner with them ?” Robin picked at a tear in her parchment. 

“Not particularly, but I wouldn’t do it unless you came with me.”

The two had escaped to the back of the library to study for their potions exam. This was the longest conversation they’d had in a week. 

“I don’t know, Black…”

“What’s the worst that could happen?”

Robin bit her lip, “my brother and I don’t particularly get along.”

“Neither do Sirius and I.”

Robin snapped her head up from her book, a murderous look in her eyes, “it’s different.”

“Fine.”

Then they went back to their readings like nothing had happened.

***

December 21, 1972

“Oi, Black! Coming to sit with us tonight, yeah?” Prometheus hollered down the table. 

Regulus could already tell his face was turning red, “erm, maybe another time.”

Then he felt a rough hand grab him from under his arm and yank him up out of his seat. 

“I think tonight’s the perfect night, actually.”

Mulciber.

“Michael, put him down,” Robin was on her feet now, too.

“Oh! She speaks!” Michael laughed as he half drug the younger boy down to where his gang of delinquents were sitting. 

It seemed only a select few were witness to these events. Evan and Barty briefly looked up and then back down at their plates, careful to not be noticed. While Narcissa and Lucius watched with a knowing glint in their eyes. They did nothing to stop Mulciber from forcibly handling Regulus. Mulciber shoved him between Prometheus and himself, using their shoulders to keep Regulus seated. Snape sat across from him, but did not meet his eye. Avery and Umbridge sat on either side of Snape and seemed particularly pleased with the events. 

“Little Reggie has finally come to join us,” Avery sneered.

“I didn’t do so willingly,” Regulus struggled against the boys on either side of him, but he was just too small.

“Why don’t you want to sit with us, Black?” Mulciber twirled a butter knife in his hand like any other student would twirl their wand.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s my strong sense of self-respect,” Regulus grunted.

They all laughed, except Snape.

“So, Black, we’ve got a couple questions for you,” Prometheus let up a bit on Regulus’ shoulder, “first, how come you ain't hanging around my little sister anymore?”

“None of your business.”

“Well it might be, depending on why you ain’t talking no more.”

“More importantly, though,” Michael interrupted, “is why you’ve been spending all your time with my sister now.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “oh please . You two have been sitting with us in the library and common room for weeks now. Don’t you think that if there was something going on, you’d pick up on it by now? Or are you just too thick to see past the end of your wands?”

At this, Snape snorted.

Mulciber's head snapped up, “something funny, Snape?”

“Yeah, Black. ”

Regulus didn’t think he was particularly funny. Sirius had gotten the comedic mischief gene while Regulus had always prided himself on being cunning and blunt. Sure, he was a bit of a smart aleck every now and then, but what Black wasn’t?

“Look, whatever you guys want, I’ll do it. Just let me go.” Regulus was getting impatient.

The older boys didn’t threaten Regulus and Avery and Umbridge were just an annoyance. He just wanted to be left alone. Regulus hated being at the center of attention. 

“We want you to join us,” Prometheus offered a genuine smile.

“Join you?”

“Be our friend.”

“And sit with us,” Mulciber added.

“And hang out with us after class,” Avery continued.

Regulus scoffed, “and why would I want to do that?”

“We can give you what you want,” Snape looked up through his curtain of long hair - longer than even Sirius’.

“And you know what I want?”

"Recognition.”

Snape said it with so much certainty, Regulus wondered briefly if the older boy had read his mind. There was nothing Regulus wanted more than to be able to prove himself. To be the best and to be recognized for it. 

They all watched him as he mulled this over.

“So I just be your friend and you give me praise? I’m not exactly sure if that’s the same as recognition.”

Mulciber leaned down inches from Regulus’ face, “you be our friend and not only will your name live in Hogwarts’ history forever, but the Dark Lord will give you nothing but praise.”

Regulus’ breath caught for just a moment. Could it be that simple? The Dark Lord had already invested his faith in Regulus, and had even given the boy a task. What kind of leverage did these boys have that Regulus did not possess? Why hadn’t the Dark Lord made Regulus head of this band of miscreants? Surely, Regulus could have put together a more worthy group than Mulciber, Avery, and Umbridge! Did Voldemort not trust him? I have to earn his trust.

“I’m in.”

***

December 24, 1972

It hadn’t even been a full two days since stepping off the Hogwarts express and onto Platform 9 ¾, but Regulus wanted so desperately to return. The ride back to London had been exhausting. Having decided to make new friends, Regulus was now required to ride back with them. Mulciber and Avery were practically made for one another. They went on and on about blood purity and mudbloods and muggles and how the Ministry needed to be cleaned out and replaced with wizards who “knew the worth of magical blood.” Dolores nodded along with them enthusiastically. Meanwhile, Prometheus was knocked out and snoring up a storm and Snape was content to sit close to the door, scribbling away in a potions book. 

“Hey, why don’t we get out of here?” Regulus gently tapped his foot on Snape’s knee, “let’s go find you friend. Evans, right?”

“Shut up,” Snape didn’t even look up from his book.

Regulus let out a long sigh. They were about half way through their journey and Regulus was growing restless. He missed Pandora. Frankly, he missed Evan and Barty, too. At least he didn’t feel like he had to be on edge with them all the time. They actually told funny jokes! Not jokes about dead muggles which Regulus forced himself to laugh at. Mulciber was disgusting and it made Regulus feel gross just being around him. 

“I’m going to the loo,” Regulus got out and left the compartment before anyone could even glance at him or question why he’d taken Karasi’s cage along, too.

The train’s corridor was quieter than expected. Though most students were probably dozing off at this point. Why the wizard born students couldn’t just floo or portkey home was beyond Regulus. Leaving that hellish compartment was only the first step in Regulus’ plan. In fact, it was the only step. Once he began walking, he realized he wasn’t entirely sure where he was going. He also didn’t know who to look for. Pandora would want nothing to do with him; even if he found her, he wouldn’t know what to say. Robin was likely with Barty and Evan. Again, he wouldn’t know what to say. Instead, he just continued to walk. 

He had gotten a few cars down when he heard a muffled, “ Reggie! ” before a compartment door slid open.

“Hiya, Reg!”

Regulus stopped dead in his tracks, then slowly spun on his heel.

“Hi, S.”

Sooner than later, Regulus knew he’d have to face his brother. They were going to be home for two weeks, he had to speak to him eventually. He just didn’t think it would be so soon.

“Whatcha up to?”

Sirius stood in the door of the compartment, wearing his signature grin and leaning up on the glass by his forearm. Sirius was so effortlessly cool and Regulus hated him for it.

“Just going for a walk.”

“Why don’t you come in for a bit? We’ve got candy.”

Regulus raised a brow, “chocolate frogs?”

“Oh, come on then you wanker,” Sirius pulled his brother into the compartment by his tie.

The usual crowd was present, plus Evans and another girl Regulus didn’t care to know. It wasn’t his first choice of company, but it was better than the alternative. So Regulus spent the remaining four hours of the train ride with a band of Gryffindors. They were actually quite fun, though Regulus would never admit that out loud. He grew a particular fondness for Lupin and Evans, but that fondness would likely get him hexed into next year if his new friends ever caught wind of it. He sat there in silence and listened as they all made fun of one another, while Lupin and Evans spoke Welsh exclusively to annoy Potter, and he smirked rather than laughed when Pettigrew ate a dirty sock flavored Bertie Bot (which Sirius had told him was coconut). 

Those images were what he forced himself to think about on the morning of Christmas eve when Walburga had woken him up for some long overdue affection. Regulus forced his mind to be back on that train. He did everything he could to ignore the shame and disgust that was raging inside him. He tried to think of the most boring topics of Herbology and History of Magic in order to combat the chemical and animalistic things happening to his body. Even the most boring of topics couldn’t overcome that pleasant sensation he had grown to hate so much. Why does it have to feel so good? The thought passed through his mind as the tears came flooding down his cheeks.

“Don’t cry, my perfect boy,” Walburga kissed the tears from his cheeks and Regulus flinched at the touch, “strong wizards don’t cry, Regulus.”

Merlin, he hated himself. Not once had he fought her, told her no, screamed for help, for her to stop. He just took it in silence. Then she left, without another word, leaving Regulus alone, cold, and naked on his bed. And he sobbed, and sobbed for so long he hadn’t realized hours had gone by. He’d only pulled himself up from the bed when he could no longer pass on using the bathroom. Of course, he had to cross Sirius’ path on the way down the hall.

“What’s wrong, Reg?” Sirius could read him like a book.

Regulus shoved his brother out of the way - hard. One of the many portraits on the wall fell to the ground with a deafening shatter.

“ Sirius! ” Walburga screeched from far below them. 

“What the bloody hell is your problem?” Sirius pushed Regulus in retaliation.

“Get the fuck away from me, Sirius!”

“Oi! What’s with the mouth, Reg?”

“I said, get away!” Regulus slammed the bathroom door in his brother’s face.

He sat against the door and listened as Walburga’s palms met Sirius’ skin over and over again. Sirius screamed as Regulus pulled his knees up to his chin and cried. In his mind he couldn’t help but repeat to himself over and over again, I want to go home. But wasn’t he home? As cliche as it was, home was where the heart is - at that certainly wasn’t Grimmauld Place. Regulus wanted Hogwarts, he wanted Pandora and Robin and Narcissa. He wanted to sit in the common room and play chess and skip stones on the lake. He wanted to go home.

***

What was a Noble House of Black Christmas Gala without a little drama? The evening started out normal enough. Regulus and Sirius were paraded through the ballroom like a couple of crowned princes. The usual faces were there, but to Regulus’ surprise, so were many of his friends. Both old and new. Of course, he knew Pandora wouldn’t be there, but Prometheus and his father were. Where Prometheus was, Mulciber wasn’t far behind. The Avery family was also present, meaning Charles was close on Mulciber’s trail. To Regulus’ great delight, Robin had come along with her family, as did Evan. 

“I didn’t know you’d be here!” Regulus couldn’t contain his excitement; maybe wishes do come true.

Evan and Robin weren’t as quick to return the enthusiasm.

“We’re only here because our parents made us come,” Evan explained with a scowl as he enjoyed a bit of catered Fortescue ice cream. 

“Well, I’m happy they did. I know it’s only been a couple of days, but I am so happy to see you.”

Robin was seething, “maybe we wouldn’t be so peeved about being here if you had been happy about seeing us at school, Black.”

That was rightfully deserved, he had to admit. 

“I’m sorry,” Regulus scratched the back of his head, “I guess I didn’t realize what I had until it was gone, you know? Being here is murder .”

“The food is quite good, though,” Evan admitted and was immediately met with Robin’s elbow in his ribs.

“Come on, Robin,” Regulus held out his hand, “what’s so bad about a little party?”

The seconds it took Robin to respond felt like an eternity. Regulus really hadn’t realized what he had at Hogwarts until he was back at Grimmauld Place. In that moment he vowed to himself to be more present, to enjoy his friends, and not get bogged down by Mulciber and his gang - or even Sirius and his gang, for that matter. He wanted his friends back and he wanted to be happy, to actually be wanted and needed as a friend should be. The weight of the air in his empty palm was beginning to weigh him down, then Robin finally took it.

Every member of the Black family was taught ballroom dancing. It was just as much of a right of passage as dark magic. Regulus had no trouble falling into time with the song and sweeping through the crowd with exquisite grace. To Regulus’ delight, Robin had no issue keeping up. Through multiple songs, Regulus swept them across the dancefloor, laughing joyfully all the while. When the music slowed, so did they, and the two swayed as they caught their breath.

“You didn’t strike me as a dancer, Black.”

“Neither did you.”

“So, what’s been going on with you?”

If Robin wasn’t quietly keeping to herself, she was getting straight to the point.

“The usual school stress, you know?”

“You need to get better at lying.”

That wasn’t the first time Regulus had heard that. Perhaps he should have been taking notes.

“I know it’s not school related, Black. Your marks are just as good as Barty’s and we’ve been studying together for the past month. Spill it.”

“It’s family stuff. I’ve got a lot on my mind.”

“You’ve said that before.”

“And I’ve been more present, haven’t I?”

“But at what cost? Pandora hates us, you and I have barely spoken to each other, and apparently you’re friends with my brother now.”

Robin was simply laying out the facts. She wasn’t angry or emotional, just unsettlingly placid. Regulus was so used to reacting to emotion that he wasn’t quite sure how to proceed. 

“Are you going to answer me some time today, Black?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m just thinking.”

They continued to sway as Regulus became lost in thought. The one thing that wasn’t adding up for him was why Robin and Prometheus had been talking that night in the common room. They seemed very familiar with each other then, but all the days after when he came to study with them, they acted like total strangers. 

“What’s going on between you and Burke?”

Robin pulled her head back slightly, “what are you talking about?”

“I know why Pandora and I aren’t speaking, but why aren’t you ?”

Regulus watched smugly as the thoughts behind Robin’s eyes scrambled.

“Are you going to answer me some time today, Mulciber ?”

Robin pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose, “that night in the common room, Prometheus and I were actually talking about the gala. This gala. Since we knew we’d both be coming.”

“And?”

“And what? That’s all.”

Regulus sighed, “you need to get better at lying.”

“What’s your relation with the Dark Lord?”

That was a loaded question. And not one easily answered. Where Robin was going with that, Regulus hadn’t a clue. What would quiet, studious, and shy Robin know about Voldemort? 

Regulus struggled to clear his throat, “he’s friends with my parents, comes over for dinner now and again.”

“Did he give you a coin?”

Regulus could feel the weight of the very coin Voldemort had given him in the pocket of his trousers. For some reason, he always had it on him. Subconsciously putting it in his pocket every morning. He’d almost forgotten its existence until Robin reminded him of it.

“He gave me one, too,” Robin pulled a necklace out from beneath the collar of her gown; the same coin Regulus had was tucked into a clear sleeve and attached to a silver chain. 

“Do you know what they’re for?”

“Everyone of us who got one has been chosen by him.”

“Who has one?”

“Myself, Michael, Avery, Evan, Pandora, and Prometheus. And now you, since I’ve just confirmed it.”

“And Sirius,” Regulus whispered.

“Sirius has one, too?”

“Keep your voice down. Yes, he has one. So I can only assume there are others, as well.”

“I think Narcissa, Lucius, and Astrid Snyde have them as well, though I can’t be sure.”

“Even if Cissy and Malfoy don’t have them, they’re close enough to him where it doesn’t matter. Robin, what does it mean?”

“It means we are absolutely screwed-”

Before Robin could continue, she was loudly interrupted by the large wooden doors at the entrance being swung open. The music stopped, the chattering stopped, and everyone watched as a very old and very drunk man came staggering in. Is that?

“Uncle Alphard!” Sirius ran to his favorite uncle, alarmed by the man’s current state.

“My favorite-” burp, “nephew!”

Regulus groaned.

“Alphard,” Walburga hissed, “what the devil are you doing here?”

“I’ve come to announce,” the man staggered forward, “that you all are a bunch of ninnies!”

He pointed at the crowd with a half empty bottle. Uncle Alphard had always looked pretty shabby, but nothing was comparable to this. His robes were ragged and dirty. He was ragged and dirty. His black hair was streaked with gray, and came down well past his shoulders. He’d even grown his beard out almost the same length. When he wasn’t drunk, he and Sirius actually grew quite the resemblance to one another. Andy had often joked that Alphard was Sirius’ real father. A horrible joke, but maybe not that far-fetched for their family, even if Alphard was Walburga’s brother. 

“Alphard, you must leave at once,” Walbruga tried to push her brother back out the door.

“I will do no such thing! I have important business to tend to!”

Swiftly, Alphard maneuvered around Walburga and began advancing towards the crowd once again. 

“It has come to my attention that no man, whether magical or otherwise, can live forever. Since I have drawn this morbid conclusion, I’ve decided to leave all of my Black inheritance to Sirius Orion Black.”

Stunned silence hung in the air.

Alphard looked about, puzzled, “well, somebody write that down now! This must be legally binding.”

Sirius was now at the man’s side, “you mean it, Uncle Alphard?”

“You are the only one in this forsaken family that has any spine, aside from Andromeda. The two of you are the only hope for us. We’ll all dye out miserable or in Azkaban or both if we don’t change.”

“That is enough ! Get out of my home, this instant!” 

Alphard winked at Sirius before disapparating. Nobody knew what to do. With Alphard gone, Walburga looked at Sirius as if he were the embodiment of his estranged uncle. It was a crazed and murderous look that Sirius knew well. In a flash the boy had booked it out the door. Though, incredibly annoyed by the interruption, Regulus didn’t blame Sirius for taking off. 

Evan was suddenly at Regulus and Robin’s side, “how much money do you think he left him?”

Chapter Text

January 5, 1973

Uncle Alphard’s appearance at the Christmas Gala was not at all appreciated. In fact, Walburga went as far as burning him off the tree the moment her guests had all left. Many Blacks before them had been burned off, and Regulus and Sirius had both watched with sadness in their hearts when Andromeda had been burned off. But Alphard’s burning was a different sort of rage.Walburga had almost set the entire wall ablaze in her fury, yet Alphard was her brother . If she could so easily burn him off the family tree, what did that say for Sirius and Regulus’ relationship?

The burning wasn’t the worst of it. Sirius was so badly beaten that Kreacher had to take his meals up to him. Regulus caught a glimpse of his brother hobbling down the hall to use the bathroom. Sirius’ eyes were swollen, his face covered in scratches and bruises. The limp he walked with suggested his legs had been injured, though Regulus couldn’t see the damage. Clumps of his hair were missing, indicating Walburga had yanked it out herself. All the anger and contempt Walburga felt towards Alphard, she was unjustly taking it out on Sirius. 

Night after night, once Sirius had stopped screaming, Regulus braced himself for Walburga’s presence. He expected it, but that didn’t make his mother’s actions any less damaging. Regulus would just lay there and wait for her arrival. He wouldn’t hide or run, though he wanted to very badly. An unknown force was keeping him glued to the spot, making him unable to deny his mother anything she wanted from him. She didn’t even have to ask. 

Needless to say, Christmas was dismal. Breakfast was eaten in silence and Sirius hadn’t even shown up. Regulus was given new robes, though it wasn’t exactly a gift. He was growing taller every month and needed clothes that actually fit him. For dinner, they floo’d to Cygnus and Druella’s. Nobody made any comments about Sirius’ appearance, though Narcissa had a difficult time hiding the fear and anger behind her eyes. Everyone had been present for Alphard’s announcement, and it was very clear Sirius had done nothing wrong. Though in the eyes of Walburga, he had been lumped in with Andromeda and that was the nail in the coffin. She had to do everything in her power to keep her family’s name and blood-traitor out of the same sentence. If that meant beating Sirius into submission, then so be it.

After two very long and excruciating weeks, Regulus and Sirius were back on the Hogwarts Express. As expected, Walburga had not healed Sirius. Normally, he’d be the first one to admit that he loves being the center of attention; but when everyone is staring at you for looking like a troll, it’s unbearable. They were the last two students on the train that morning, mainly because Regulus had bribed Kreacher to stall Walburga. Not too many people saw Sirius, but it was enough. Sirius led them to his usual compartment and as the door slid open, there was an audible gasp from those inside. 

“What happened to you?” James was on his feet in an instant.

“Got mauled by Reggie’s damn kneazle.” 

“That’s not funny, Sirius.” Regulus and Remus spoke in unison. 

They all took their seats and the others stared at Sirius in stunned silence.

“Sirius,” the girl Regulus hadn’t recognized from the previous train ride began to pull out her wand, “I think I can help you.”

“Don’t bother.”

“I use the hair growth spell on myself all the time, I know I can do it.”

“I’ll just go see Pomfrey when we get back.”

James leaned forward, “doesn’t it hurt?”

Sirius just shrugged.

“If you wait until we get back then everyone will see,” Petter added.

“I don’t care if everyone will see,” Sirius snapped.

Everyone knew that was a lie. 

The others talked about their holiday while Sirius and Regulus sat in uncomfortable silence. After a couple of hours there was a knock at the door, it slid open to reveal Severus Snape. 

“Get lost, Snivellus,” Sirius grumbled.

“Nice to see you too, Black.”

“What do you need, Sev?” Lily asked, sounding a bit impatient.

“I’m here for Regulus.”

Sirius stood, “what do you want with him?” 

“None of your business,” Severus turned to Regulus, “let’s go.”

Regulus had no choice but to oblige. He followed the older boy down the corridor and watched his robe fly out from behind him with deliberate speed. They had six hours ahead of them, for what reason would Snape be running through the train? Regulus rolled his eyes, but quickened his pace. 

“What’s the rush, Snape?”

“Shut up.”

Regulus snorted, “and I thought I had issues. You know, my friends are always telling me to be more open and to watch my temper. I thought Evans would be keeping you in line, but it doesn’t seem to be working.”

“Just like your brother. Arrogant and obnoxious.”

“I may be arrogant, but please keep the obnoxious title for Sirius, yeah?”

Snape groaned.

Honestly, Snape didn’t bother Reggie. He was just so happy to be back on the train to Hogwarts, he didn’t care one bit about who he was around. Eventually they came to an open car with little booths lining each side. The interior was upholstered with green fabric, reminiscent of the Slytherin common room. Upon further inspection, it appeared all the students in this car belonged to Slytherin house. 

“There’s a Slytherin car?”

“Not exactly, we’ve just taken over throughout the years,” Severus shoved Regulus forward. 

Up ahead Regulus spotted Prometheus, Avery, and Michael in a booth with their heads together over the table. In the booth adjacent sat Robin and Evan. Their presence was unexpected, but much appreciated. Regulus took his seat with them, as Snape slid in next to Mulciber. 

“Have a good holiday, Black?” Prometheus gave the younger boy a knowing look.

“Yeah,” Regulus lied.

“It’s my understanding, you and Robin had a little chat about the coins?”

Regulus nodded.

“Good, we’ll get started once Narcissa and Lucius are done making their rounds.”

“What’s going on?” Regulus whispered to Robin and Evan.

“A meeting of the morons,” Evan smirked.

“Malfoy wanted us all together before we got back,” Robin nervously stroked her hair. 

As if speaking his name summoned him, Lucius immediately strolled through the door with Narcissa, Astrid Snyde, Crabbe, and Goyle behind him. They took the booths between the younger Slytherins and the door. Nobody else was in the compartment but them, so it shouldn’t have surprised Regulus when Lucius drew his wand to lower the blinds and lock the doors.

“I’ll get straight to it. It’s my understanding that each of us have had a personal encounter with the Dark Lord.”

Everyone nodded except Snape, but Lucius paid him no mind.

“There are a few who were originally sought out by the Dark Lord who now no longer possess his shared values.”

Sirius and Pandora . Though Regulus suspected that there were probably quite a few more.

“You were all given a task when you arrived at Hogwarts this year. Now is the time to share your progress. The Dark Lord tasked Narcissa and myself to hide a few very valuable objects of his, and I believe we’ve done so to the best of our abilities. Snyde?”

Narcissa’s roommate was an angry looking girl with pointed features and a short haircut to match.

“I’ve collected over ten thousand galleons in contribution to the Dark Lord’s plan from various wizarding families in the UK.”

Regulus, Robin, and Evan shared a look. What the bloody hell are we being recruited for?

On and on each of the students went discussing money, giants, various dark creatures, dangerous spells, potions, and plants. Too soon were all eyes on Regulus, waiting for him to convey his findings. 

“The Dark Lord-” Regulus coughed, “the Dark Lord tasked me with keeping an eye on other students and determining who may align with him.”

There was a long pause.

“Well, spit it out, Black,” Lucius waved his hand.

Regulus swallowed the rock forming in his throat, “not including those who are present, Barty Crouch jr., Lori Abbott, Quirinus Quirrell-”

There was snicker from Avery and Mulciber, but Malfoy quickly shushed them.

“Robert Wilkes, Patricia Rakepike, and potentially the Prewett twins.”

Narcissa’s face grew hot at the mention of the name.

“That’s all?” Malfoy questioned.

“Like I said, aside from you lot. I hadn’t realized this little group was forming, you were all on my list from the jump.”

“So, no Umbridge?” Lucius tapped his fingers on the table.

Regulus shook his head, “she talks like she’s all high and mighty, but I don’t think she’s the kind of witch we should be associating with.”

“Why is that?”

Regulus didn’t really have a good reason and Lucius recognized that.

“Black, you must have a valid reason as to why someone may or may not align with the Dark Lord. It is extremely important that you do that.”

Regulus nodded.

“Robin?” Lucius turned his attention to the youngest Mulciber.

Up until that moment, Regulus hadn’t realized that Robin and Evan must have been given tasks as well. For months they hid this from one another. What more could they be hiding?

“I haven’t made much progress,” Robin sunk into the booth a bit.

“And why is that?”

“Well I can’t exactly force myself to see the future,” she lashed out.

That certainly caught everyone’s attention. Malfoy didn’t linger on the subject. 

“Rosier?

“I’ve been studying dueling, as requested. I’ve gotten a pretty decent hand on a few spells,” Evan began to count them off on his fingers, “ flipendo, expelliarmus, petrificus totalus,  immobulus. ”

"Blimey, some of those don’t get taught until third year,” Prometheus noted.

Evan shrugged, “I have a good partner.”

“Barty’s been helping you?” Regulus couldn’t help his shock.

“The same Barty, you made note of?” Lucius asked.

Regulus nodded and watched as Lucius scribbled onto a piece of parchment. Everyone had spoken except for Snape, who had almost blended into the shadows over the duration of the meeting. Lucius isn’t going to question him? It seemed nobody had taken any interest in the boy. Snape was just simply there . Malfoy adjourned the meeting, unlocked the doors, and everyone was free to go. The Dark Lord had been present in Regulus' life for barely a year, yet he was having school children complete tasks for him and then meet to discuss those tasks? It seemed only Regulus found that to be a cause for alarm. Everyone else was going about things just fine. Am I losing my mind? Regulus questioned himself as he watched the others leave the train car. 

Regulus caught his cousin’s hand, “Cissy, can you hang back a moment?”  

She turned to Lucius, “go ahead, I won’t be long behind you.”

Once the car had cleared out, Narcissa engulfed Regulus in the warmest, yet most heart wrenching hug he'd ever been given. Regulus’ nerves calmed instantly at her gentle touch. Narcissa always had a way with regulating his emotions; she always knew what to do. 

“How’s Sirius?”

“In pain,” Regulus could feel Narcissa tense up at his words.

She pulled away, “what’s going on, Reggie?”

“I just need a little help understanding all this ,” Regulus motioned to the empty compartment. 

Narcissa threw herself into one of the booths, she seemed tired and lifeless. Not the Cissy that Regulus knew.

Regulus continued, “why does the Dark Lord need me? Need any of us? We’re kids.”

“Well, it’s like any other political or social movement. Students get involved, set up their own meetings and organizations. It’s a good thing, it shows we’re interested and invested in our own futures.”

Regulus gazed lazily at his cousin through his brows, “I don’t want to get involved in politics. I’m eleven.”

Narcissa sighed deeply. She looked as if she could have fallen asleep right then and there.

“We come from important families, we’re all connected to business, to Hogwarts, to the Ministry. Voldemort understands our wants and needs and he’s able to provide those things for us. In return, we’re the boots on the ground.”

“I don’t want to be his boots on the ground. I just want to go to school and play Quidditch and have friends! Robin and Evan are my friends and I didn’t even know they were involved in all this.”

“We all have a role to play, Regulus.”

“Yeah, what’s yours?”

“I’m a pathokinesis." 

“So we’re just making up words now?” Regulus crossed his arms.

“That means I can manipulate emotions. Calm a room, make people angry or jealous or sad.”

And then it dawned on him, “you’ve been doing that to me for ages!”

Narcissa nodded, “I don’t know everything that’s going on in your life, Regulus, but I’ve tried to help you in the only way I know how.”

The two silently looked over one another. A sense of understanding was being built. Regulus couldn’t tell if it was Narcissa’s abilities or not, but he was calming down. 

“What’s my role then?”

“The observer,” Narcissa smiled softly, “hardly anything gets past you. You’re more ambitious than any of us. When you want something you get it, you’ll stop at nothing to find it. So when the Dark Lord tasks you with watching people, learning about people, that’s extremely important.”

Regulus knew that this should have made him feel good about himself, it was that recognition he wanted, but he couldn’t help the odd feeling of nausea setting in. The way Cissy said it all so casually, like Regulus should have known all of that by now, was the most unsettling of all. He was supposed to be the observer, but yet he felt like he was the only one in the dark.

“Why is everyone else more caught up than I am?”

Narcissa looked away, “that’s partially my fault. I told Lucius I’d speak to you myself, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. After my injuries, I briefly forgot all about it. Lucius conversed with the others weeks ago, but the Dark Lord doesn’t want us speaking about our assignments too much. I’m assuming that’s why Mulciber and Rosier didn’t confide in you.”

“What about Sirius and Pandora? They got the coins, too.”

“The Dark Lord still has hope for them both. There are many qualities Sirius possesses that would be helpful to Voldemort’s cause, but he’s just so defiant right now the time just isn’t right. Pandora, with her abilities, would be a great asset. Her mother is keeping her distant, though…”

As Narcissa trailed off, Regulus couldn’t help but feel that she was leaving something out. The way she wouldn’t meet his eyes and how she twisted the rings on her fingers. Cissy wasn’t the anxious type.

“What aren’t you telling me?”

“You’re in a very unique position, Regulus. Your relation to both Sirius and Pandora… it’s up to you-”

“It’s up to me to rope them in?”

Narcissa was silent.

“Cissy, I don’t even want to be here! Why do I have to convince them?”

“Because you have to.”

Then for a moment, Regulus felt all the fear Narcissa felt. It was like experiencing a chill deep in his bones and it weighed heavy on his chest. Tears sprung to his eyes and the color quickly drained from his face. Narcissa was on him in an instant, whipping the tears away as quickly and as gently as she could, repeatedly shushing him.

“Regulus, you can’t cry. I only know so much, and I can’t share it all with you. But now you know how I feel, so don’t let your guard down for a second.”

Struggling to breathe through his choked sobs, Regulus could only nod. Narcissa took him by the shoulders, her nose almost touching his.

“It is more important than ever that you play by the rules. You cannot step a toe out of line from here on out. Do you understand, Regulus?”

Regulus managed an almost inaudible, “yes.”

Chapter Text

February 9, 1973

It had become increasingly difficult for Regulus to maintain his promise to himself. Rather than returning to Sirius and his friends, he found an empty compartment and locked the door. The fear Narcissa allowed him to feel consumed him for much longer than he cared to admit. Regulus had stopped crying, but his labored breath created a tight burning sensation in his lungs which he could not control. Narcissa’s fear was quickly replaced with his own. The inability to breathe properly was becoming worse and worse for Regulus inside the barely lit compartment. His mind wandered to images of Voldemort as he attempted to discern as to why Narcissa was so terrified. Then the idea of Pandora and Sirius being in danger for not complying invaded his already spiraling thoughts. He couldn’t help but think about the terrible fates they may endure if he wasn’t able to bring them into the fold. It would be his fault if something awful happened to them.

Voices out in the corridor called for Regulus. First it was Sirius and Remus. Regulus had curled up on the floor up against the door, so if they had looked in, they hadn’t seen him. A few hours later it was Robin, Evan, and Barth. Again, Regulus ignored the call. Regulus blinked and was suddenly seated at Slytherin’s long table in the Great Hall. In another blink, he was unpacking his trunk at the foot of his bed while Barty and Evan rambled on openly about their dueling training. Avery commented every now and then, while Florian’s bed curtains remained completely closed. This pattern of coming in and out of consciousness continued until Professor McGonagall asked him to stay after class. Her stern demeanor pulled Regulus back to reality.

“Yes, Professor?”

“I can’t help but notice that your usual attentiveness and performance in my class has not been present these past few weeks. Is there anything you’d care to speak to me about?”

Regulus thought this over for a moment. Could he trust McGonagall, confide in her, even? If so, he didn’t even know where to begin. He wasn’t even sure how many weeks it had been since they returned to Hogwarts. Regulus was simply going through the motions; going to class, going to meals, watching Quidditch, and laughing at his friends’ jokes which he hadn’t even heard. Regulus was a ghost of himself.

“Mr. Black?”

”Yes, Professor?”

McGonagall sighed, “please see that you complete your past due assignments. I will allow another week, but I don’t think the other professors will be as generous. I’d hate to take any house points or give you detention for a problem that can be easily resolved.”

“Thank you, Professor,” Regulus turned towards the door.

“Not so fast, Black.”

Regulus slowly returned his attention.

“I have also spoken to Professor Slughorn and I believe he should be reaching out to you shortly. Remember, if you need anything you can go to any of your professors.”

Wordlessly, Regulus nodded and headed out the door.

Transfiguration was the Slytherin’s only class on Friday, which was a great end to the week. As Regulus walked through the quiet halls towards the Great Hall for lunch, he was gradually coming back into himself. Similar to waking up from a dream, Regulus’s mind and surroundings slowly came back to him. It was all familiar, yet not at all. Enough time had passed for the paralyzing fear to subside into normal fear, and this left Regulus numb. Now that he was “awake,” there was nothing left to do but continue on. Regulus was determined to do better, he had to. Nothing was worth his grades slipping and he didn’t want anyone to suspect that something was off. 

Apparently everyone had already suspected something was off. The moment Regulus took his seat in the Great Hall, Robin’s eyes lit up.

“You’re back!”

“What do you mean, I’m back?”

“Hate to break it to you, mate, but you’ve been zoned out for weeks,” Barty commented.

Regulus scoffed, “no I haven’t.”

His friends all peered at him wearily.

“Reg, you’ve been in your own little world since we got back,” Evan added.

There was no fooling them.

“Fine, I’ve been a little out of it,” Regulus started to load up his plate.

Everyone watched him as he began to eat.

“What?” Regulus asked, his mouth full.

“That’s the most you’ve eaten in weeks ,” Robin pushed up her glasses.

Regulus looked down at his plate. Fish and chips, a pile of mixed vegetables, a baked potato, apple slices, and a large dinner roll. Maybe it was a bit excessive but he was astonishingly hungry. So he just shrugged and kept eating. 

Being the weekend before Valentine’s Day, the Great Hall was covered in pink, red, and white streamers and paper hearts. Enchanted cherub decorations weaved in and out of the floating candles and occasionally shot vanishing arrows above the students’ heads. The older students were all either incredibly stressed out or gushing over one another. 

“I wish Pandora was here,” Evan sighed, leaning on his elbow.

Everyone turned their attention to Rosier, a bit shocked by his declaration. He and Pandora never really had the closest friendship to begin with.

“ Why ?” Robin reeled her head back at an attempt to look disgusted.

“I had a really good idea for a prank and I know she’d love it. I don’t know what the two of you did to her, but I wish you’d fix it.”

“We didn’t do anything! She’s holding a grudge for no reason,” Robin crossed her arms.

Barty snorted, “not by my understanding. Regulus really mucked things up.”

Regulus glared at Crouch, but kept his mouth shut.

“Well I didn’t do anything. She’s just being petty and taking out her anger on us.”

Regulus craned his neck to spot Pandora seated at Ravenclaw with Lovegood, Quirrell, and Green. Pandora’s replacement friends. Even after returning to Hogwarts, Pandora still wasn’t speaking to her house mates. Any classes where they weren’t paired up with Ravenclaw, Pandora stuck close to Lauren and Dorcas, while Robin picked up Regulus’ slack. 

“What kind of prank do you have in mind?“ Regulus asked, figuring getting involved in something Evan wanted to do would pull him out of his disassociated state. 

“It involved Pandora’s metamorphic abilities,” Evan waved his hand, “it doesn’t matter.”

“Can we do it another way?”

“I thought we could mess with Prewett again, since it’s Valentine’s and all.”

Barty chimed in, “what if we sent Valentine’s signed by other people?”

“That’s a bit mean,” Robin mumbled under her breath.

Barty only smirked.

“I have just the target,” and just like that, Regulus had forgotten entirely about Cissy’s warning.

***

“Are you sure this will work?” Evan was leaning over Regulus’ shoulder.

“Of course it’ll work. His penmanship is more feminine than Robin’s,” Barty laughed.

Robin glared at Crouch, “at least my handwriting doesn’t look like a Rowena Ravenclaw’s diary! It’s hardly legible, no matter how pretty it is.”

“Robin, were you able to snag Selena’s lipstick?” Regulus kept writing.

“Unfortunately.”

“And… all done! Care to read it over?”

Evan snatched up the Valentine and cleared his throat dramatically, “To my dearest James, after battling with my feelings for you for all this time, I’ve finally realized how full of love my heart is for you. From the smudge on your glasses to the way your hair sticks up in every direction, to the incredible way you fly your broom, you’ve truly captivated me. On this Valentine’s Day, I ask you with all my heart, will you be my Valentine?”

“Are you not going to sign it?” Barty asked.

“No, that’s the best part. We’re going to charm it so that anyone he shows it to looks like it’s signed by Sirius.”

“That is devious. Black, have I told you how much I love you?” Evan was beaming with mischief.

“Rosier, if you ever say that to me ever again I will use an unforgivable on you.”

“Fair enough.”

“So, why do we need lipstick?” 

“To really sell it. If there’s kiss marks on it, Potter will believe it’s from Evans but everyone else will think Sirius kissed it.”

“Won’t they just think Sirius is pulling the prank?”

“Maybe, but if we can get the charm right we can make it so when Sirius looks at it, it’ll be signed by Evans and that’s what Potter will see, too.”

“They’re going to be so bloody confused,” Evan couldn’t hide his glee.

“Alright, Robin, do the honors.”

“I’m not putting this stuff on!”

“Oh, bloody hell, give it to me,” Evan snatched the lipstick tube, “it was my idea for a prank anyway.”

Without delay, Evan uncapped the tube and applied far too much red lipstick across his mouth. There was little care in applying the makeup, as Rosier quire resembled a clown. With great gusto, he smacked his lips on the little card. The small group of Slytherins were laughing historically, clutching their sides. 

“Barty, you’re the best at charms,” Evan passed the card over.

Regulus explained his line of thinking; a concealment charm, combined with a confundus charm, combined with a disillusionment charm. It was tricky magic and after testing on a spare bit of parchment, Barty was able to figure it out perfectly. 

“To be clear, I love Crouch, too,” Evan announced.

“Yes, we’re one big happy family,” Robin rolled her eyes playfully, “so, how do we get this to Potter?”

“The frog choir is raising funds through distributing Valentines on Wednesday during lunch, I’m going to sneak it into their boxes,” Regulus was feeling quite smug - how he managed to pull all that planning off after weeks of being entirely not himself was a miracle. Seeing everyone laugh, feeling included, was enough to make him push the unhappy thoughts deep in the furthest corners of his mind. 

“Merlin, I hope this works,” Evan was flushed with excitement.

Barty smacked the back of his head, “it’ll work.”

“Are we sure we should do this though? What if it doesn’t really go how we want it to?” Robin was mindlessly tapping the card against the palm of her hand.

Regulus carefully took it from her and examined their work, sure enough it showed Sirius’ signature at the bottom. 

He just shrugged, “what’s the worst that could happen?”

***

February 14, 1973

So, their prank didn’t go exactly to plan. Regulus was able to get the card in the frog choir’s boxes easily enough. Cissy had one on the bench next to her at breakfast that morning. The card had been delivered successfully; the four young Slytherins watched on the edge of their seats as Potter read it through. His expression went from confused to pure delight. Just as planned he passed the note to Sirius first, who also lit up instantly. After that is where it started to go a bit downhill.

“Sirius, that has your name on it. Why would you sign it with your name?” Peter threw the card across the table.

James scrambled to pick it back up.

“No it doesn’t!” James protested, “see here, Lily Evans ,” he pointed to the spot where Sirius’ name was signed. 

“I didn’t sign it! It says her name on it!” Sirius yelled.

Then Lily sat down opposite Sirius and James, “says whose name on it? You boys are actually getting Valentines?”

“Lily, please tell them who signed this,” Lupin snached the card from James’ hands. 

Evans giggled as she read the card, “Sirius, why would you write this?”

“I didn’t!” Sirius slammed his fists on the table, his face quickly reddening. 

“Sure looks like it,” Evans gave the card back to a very pouty James Potter. 

The entire ordeal was becoming increasingly more difficult to watch from the Slytherin table. Regulus hadn’t expected so much second hand embarrassment. 

Lupin studied his friend with his arms crossed tight across his chest, “how’d you do it?”

“Do what?” Sirius’ voice cracked.

“You figured out some way to charm this. How’d you do it?”

“I didn’t do anything!”

James was slowly coming to the same conclusion as Remus, “you charmed it to make me read it as Lily’s name, but everyone else would read it as yours?”

“No, I didn't! It says Lily Evans right there!” 

To this Lily scoffed, “it most certainly does not. No offense, Potter, but I did not write that.”

“If you wanted to make a believable prank, you shouldn’t have put your name on it, Sirius. You really made this more complicated for yourself,” Lupin was becoming quite annoyed; this was an unexpected outcome.

“I didn’t do it!” 

Sirius wasn’t convincing anybody.

Robin turned to face the other boys, “maybe we shouldn’t have done this.”

“This is quality entertainment, Robin!” Evan was ecstatic. 

“I told you it would work,” Barty lazily twirled his wand. 

Regulus scratched the back of his head, “yeah, maybe a bit too well.”

The Gryffindors were still arguing back and forth over whether or not Sirius had written the Valentine. The longer it went on, the more Sirius became red and the more Potter looked lifeless. Lupin was just absolutely laying into Sirius, something Regulus had not foreseen and frankly couldn’t understand. Lily and Peter were both equally uncomfortable with how the conversation had escalated. 

Then Sirius was storming out of the Great Hall. 

It was just supposed to be a laugh. How had it all gone so poorly? Meanwhile, Regulus and Robin were the only ones who seemed to feel any bit of remorse. 

“Maybe we should go over there and set things right,” Robin was already getting up from the table as she spoke.

Evan pulled her back down, “you’ll ruin it!”

“I think it’s already ruined, actually,” Regulus admitted. 

“I think maybe just an anonymous Valentine would have done the trick,” Robin leaned on her elbows, also beginning to become quite annoyed.

“I’ll clear things up with Sirius later, I think our prank is already too far gone by now,” Regulus could see Lupin and James bickering, but Lily was nowhere to be found. 

***

Before dinner that same night, Regulus waited outside the Great Hall in order to catch Sirius on his way in. Instead, he found himself caught by Professor Slughorn. 

“Regulus, dear boy, do you have a moment?”

“Er… not exactly, sir,” Regulus was frantically looking around for his brother.

“I won’t take too much of your time,” Slughorn placed a hand on Regulus’ shoulder and led him a bit further down the hall.

“Professor McGonagall has expressed some worry over your academic performance, and while I have seen no concerning changes in my class, I wanted to see if there is anything you need.”

“No, sir, not at all,” Regulus tried to skirt around the old man, but Slughorn was quicker than he looked.

He stepped in front of Regulus with his hand out slightly, “your other professors, however, have also noticed undesirable changes. Is there anything I should be aware of?”

“No, sir.”

Regulus could see Sirius coming up the stairs.

“Sir, I know I’ve been behind in some of my classes, but I’ve already made great strides to get ahead. Please, sir, will you excuse me?”

Regulus took off running.

He reached Sirius just as he got to the top of the stairs. 

“Come with me,” Regulus dragged Sirius back down the stairs by the front of his robes.

“Reggie! What are you doing ?” Sirius swatted at Regulus’ hand, “I’ve had a shite day, get off me!”

At the bottom of the steps, Regulus shoved Sirius towards the closest wall, “will you shut up?”

“Oi! You’re the one dragging my arse about, I can complain all I want.”

“Look, I wrote that Valentine, okay? I didn’t think it would go over so poorly, but I didn’t want you taking the blame for it.”

“You what ?”

“It was a prank!” Regulus threw his hands up defensively, “you pull pranks all the time!”

“Yeah, well thought out pranks. Reg, that was brutal. Potter is a mess, Lupin is pissed at me for some bloody reason, and Lily is beside herself with embarrassment. It wasn’t funny.”

“I know, I know! It’s not like we planned for this to happen.”

“ We ?”

Shite. 

Regulus groaned, “Rosier wanted to pull a prank and he had this half baked idea, Crouch and I came up with the charm, and Robin just kind of supervised, I guess.”

Sirius smacked Regulus in the ear.

“What the hell, S!”

“Your stupid fucking friends are causing issues with my stupid fucking friends,” Sirius smacked him again.

“Stop hitting me!”

“At least I’m not beating the shite out of you.”

“Violence can’t solve all your problems, S, you should know!”

The two brothers glared at each other, both breathing heavily and brows narrowed. 

“Fuck you, Reg,” Sirius started making his way back towards the Great Hall.

He got a few steps and then quickly turned back around, “you have to tell them it was you. They won’t believe me.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “ fine. ”

With his head bowed in shame, Regulus explained everything. Almost instantly, all of Lupin’s anger and annoyance redirected from Sirius to Regulus. James was still upset at first, but then couldn’t stop laughing at how it was Regulus who had physically written the note. There were quite a few comments made about his girlish penmanship. Regulus could live with that. The greatest shock came from Lily. Rather than being angry or upset with Regulus, she instantly forgave him. With those exact words.

“I forgive you, Regulus,” she touched his arm softly and Regulus instinctively drew back.

The voice in his head was screaming mudblood . Instinctively, he felt the need to scrub off a layer of skin. That’s what his mother would have done. Everyone noticed his reaction, but nobody mentioned it.

Lily looked over Regulus’ shoulder to find three sets of Slytherin eyes all spying on them, she smiled gently, “you can tell your friends that I forgive them , too.”

Regulus only nodded.

It hadn’t even been a full week since Regulus was called upon to check back into reality, yet there he was being lectured by professors, orchestrating horrible pranks, and being touched by mudbloods. Merlin, I have to get myself together. Maybe it was the reality check Regulus needed, but certainly not one that he wanted.

Back in the dorms, Regulus climbed into his bed and curled up beside Karasi who snored quietly while tucked in a little ball. His eyes blinked slowly as he was about to drift off into sleep, but then he noticed the corner of pink paper sticking out from under his pillow. Regulus lifted it to find two small cards. Oh no. 

The first one read:

Roses are red

Aconites are blue

All that I have said

Is an indicator true

For all of my feelings

I have about you

Regulus closed his eyes, silently wishing that the card would be blank when he opened them again. With one eye he peaked at the little pink paper and groaned. The Valentine didn’t need a signature, it was obvious who it was from. There was nothing Regulus wanted more than to believe it was Sirius getting back at him, but Regulus knew his brother wouldn’t have had the chance during dinner. He didn’t even want to see what the other one said.

Regulus,

I know you find it difficult to open up, but for me it’s not as hard. Hopefully, I can convey some thoughts and feelings we may both have in common to help you feel not so alone. I am angry almost all the time. I don’t know why, sometimes there’s no reason at all, but it’s there. Being around you helps control my temper… until you speak and then I’m angrier than ever. I have a hard time trusting you and a harder time forgiving you. All in all, I love you just the same. You’re my friend and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Happy Valentine’s Day. 

Regulus was hopelessly confused. The first note had to be from Pandora. Right? Right? And the second one was from Robin. Absolutely. Regulus scanned both Valentines again and again, each time becoming more and more unsure. Either girl could have written either note. Or neither of them had written anything and Regulus was just over thinking things. Or under-thinking things. No! Oh, Merlin, please no. Regulus rubbed his eyes. Why couldn’t he have just stayed stuck in his head a few days longer?

Regulus fell asleep that night with both Valentine’s clutched against his chest and Karasi curled up in his side. His dreams were odd and restless, but nothing which caused him to wake in a panic like most nights. There were so many different things going on around him, happening to him, he could hardly keep it all straight. Even in his dreams he couldn’t escape the many faces, obstacles, and forked paths. Regulus found himself running. There was a creature in the distance which Regulus couldn’t clearly make out. His subconscious told him it had wings and he accepted that as fact. Soon, he was on the back of this winged creature. In his dream he announced to himself that it was a Thestral he rode upon. Regulus had never seen a Thestral before, but his mind was certain that he was on one. Then he was the Thestral. He wasn’t sure how he knew it, but he did. Regulus wasn’t confused by this, instead he happily accepted it. How interesting dreams can be, when they’re not comprised of nightmares.

Chapter Text

April 6, 1973

Life at Hogwarts had remained oddly normal after Valentine’s Day. Regulus didn’t dare confront Pandora or Robin about the cards he had received, having buried them deep in his trunk and made forcibly forgotten. Birthdays passed with the usual celebrations; with Evan having turned 12 towards the end of February and Robin at the beginning of March. There was cake and candy, and gift giving. As it was, Regulus was not the best gift giver. Perhaps that was a trait he inherited from his parents. Evan, happier and more carefree than them all, had graciously accepted the large assortment of Honeydukes treats Regulus had sent for. When Robin's birthday rolled around, Regulus realized he hardly knew the girl he'd come to spend most of his time with. She never talked about herself much, and to be fair neither did Regulus. Aside from school work, Robin spent most of her time reading and writing. Other than that, Regulus failed to acknowledge much else. As a last ditch effort, Regulus wrote to Flourish and Blotts and requested an emerald green leather bound journal and a set of their finest quills. Robin was beside herself upon opening the beautifully wrapped package. Running her hand across the cover of the book and twirling the feathered quills between her fingers, Robin seemed to have been enchanted by the quality and elegance of the simple gifts. Regulus didn't think the items were all that special; before giving the gift he had been a little ashamed in the lack of thought he believed to have given. The small smile and the burn in Robin's cheeks suggested just how truly grateful she was. Every day following her birthday, Robin could be found scribbling away in her new book. 

As the days turned from winter to spring, there were hardly any pranks coming from Sirius and his friends, or even the Prewetts. It seemed the only one in Hogwarts who never rested from making mischief was Peeves. Classes went on as expected; the first years were now on to performing the severing charm, reading up on yetis, cultivating Devil’s Snare, brewing Pompion Potion, and transfiguring mice into snuff boxes. Regulus had easily gotten his marks back up and was competing with Barty yet again. There was little mention of Voldemort’s tasks, as everyone became more caught up in their school work and extracurriculars. Regulus had been fully present for every moment and he was genuinely happy.

Of course, there were still times where Regulus wandered off on his own. The weather was warming up and he found himself spending early evenings in the astronomy tower, watching the sun set behind the surrounding mountains. These lone excursions no longer came from a place of pain and emptiness, but rather out of appreciation and self preservation. Regulus loved his friends, but he needed the time to be on his own every now and again. Sitting up in the astronomy allowed him to breathe and reflect. His hiding spot had evolved into a place of rest. 

Always making sure to go to the tower well before classes, Regulus never saw anyone else up there. Until that evening, Regulus had always been blissfully alone. As he gazed out over the mountains, there was a sudden echo of feet meeting the metal stairs which led up the tower’s shaft. Regulus sighed and began to collect his things in order to make a quick getaway once the intruder had finally made their way to the top. Just as the young Slytherin threw his bag over his shoulder, a familiar head emerged from the stairwell.

Regulus groaned, throwing his head back in annoyance.

Startled, the intruder jumped at Regulus’ audible dismay.

“You scared the shite out of me, Reg,” Sirius pushed his hair back.

“Yeah, well I was just leaving.”

Regulus made an attempt to quickly pass his brother, but Sirius had caught his shoulder.

“Can we talk?” Sirius’ eyes were glossed over.

He was clearly in a vulnerable state; if he had been covered in cuts or bruises, Regulus would have suspected he’d been recently beaten. 

“Fine,” Regulus dropped his bag and took a seat on one of the many stone benches which lined the tower.

There was a long silence and the two brothers sat there, staring at their feet. They hadn’t spoken since the Valentine’s fiasco.

“Reggie, do you ever feel like your life is one big joke? Like every day you wake up expecting to be somewhere else, in another body, living a life that isn’t- isn’t this ?” Sirius gestured around them.

“Yeah,” it was hardly a whisper, but Sirius heard him.

“Everyone else is just so damn happy. I want to be happy, I pretend to be, but I’m so sad. I don’t even have a good reason to be sad! When I’m here, everything is grand. It’s only shite when we go home. But I shouldn’t be sad when I’m here, you know?”

“I know.”

“I have good friends, I get good grades, I have loads of fun, but I’m miserable! How does that even make sense?”

Regulus let out a great big sigh. He didn’t have the answer. Sirius was asking him questions he had been asking himself for a long time. He just tried to block all that stuff out. Regulus hadn’t expected all that from Sirius. His brother always wore a massive grin, was always loud and laughing obnoxiously. Everyone loved Sirius. Indeed, how could Sirius Black be so miserable?

“When we came back after Christmas, I kind of lost myself…”

Sirius snapped his head up, his own worries forgotten as he eyed his little brother protectively.

Regulus continued, “for over a month, I- I blacked out, I guess.”

“What do you mean?”

“I went from Grimmauld Place to McGonagall confronting me after class and I didn’t even know what day it was,” Regulus shook his head, “I’m fine now, but it felt so weird.”

They were silent again.  

“I do that, too. Sometimes when Walburga’s really laying it on thick, I’m just gone ,” Sirius shrugged so casually. 

“Sirius, she- she-” Regulus wanted to confess, but the words got caught in his throat as tears sprung to his eyes.

“What does she do to you, Reg? I know it’s something awful, I want to help you,” Sirius spoke slowly as he pleaded with his brother.

“I don’t really know what she’s doing- how to describe it, I mean. But it’s bad .”

“Okay,” Sirius nodded, “but she doesn’t hit you, right? Like she does to me?”

Regulus shook his head, “she touches me.”

Sirius’ eyes grew wide - that was not what he was expecting.

“Like how-how people sometimes do when they do it ?”

Regulus nodded.

Before Sirius had gone off to Hogwarts for his first year, Walburga had sat them down at the kitchen table and gave them her version of “the talk.” It was mortifying. Before then, Regulus didn’t know a thing about hormones or sex or even love. Sirius had giggled through the whole ordeal. That conversation happened months before the first time Walburga had ever sought him out. It took a long time for Regulus to realize what was actually happening.

For the first time in his life, Sirius was at a loss for words. So, Regulus continued. He told him the first time it had happened and how Walburga was more affectionate after punishing Sirius. He explained how trapped he felt, like his actions weren’t his own, how he couldn’t deny her or yell or anything. Sirius’ face was slack, expressionless, as Regulus just poured his heart out. The boy had never told anyone this, but finally given the chase to, he just couldn’t stop. A glorious weight was being lifted.

“Sirius, you can’t tell anyone,” Regulus finished.

“What? She can’t keep doing this, Reg! I won’t let this keep happening to you,” Sirius was frantic.

“It’s been going on long enough. It’s not like you can stop her.”

“But I want to help you!”

“You can’t help me, Sirius. I don’t think anyone can.”

It was a sad truth, but the truth nonetheless. 

“You’re just going to let it happen?”

“I’ve tried to stop her. I physically can’t, S. I don’t know how she does it.”

More silence. 

Then Sirius gasped, raising his hand to his mouth, “I think I know! She’s sometimes able to cast crucio wordlessly. It’s possible she’s casting imperio that way, too.”

This had never occurred to Regulus. Not even once. For over a year, his own mother was using an unforgivable on him. It made so much sense. Too much sense. Regulus knew it had to be true, but he couldn’t bring himself to accept it. He shook his head, hands shaking.

“No… no. She can’t have. She wouldn’t!”

“We both know she could, and she has,” Sirius tried to reach out to Regulus, but the younger boy recoiled.

“It’s shite, I know, but if that’s how she’s doing it, then maybe there’s a way to stop her!”

Sirius was getting too bold, too excited at the possibility of helping Regulus. As if solving Regulus’ problems would somehow free Sirius of his own. Regulus stood to leave.

“I’m not talking about this anymore.”

“Regulus, wait. I want to help.”

“You can’t . You can’t solve everyone’s problems, S, and you certainly can’t solve mine!”

Sirius didn’t follow Regulus out of the astronomy tower. Regulus quietly wished he had. Taking his anguish out on Sirius wasn’t fair, but Regulus hated how good Sirius was. Even with all the pranks, the behavioral issues, and the occasional sibling bickering, Sirius Black had a good, pure heart. That was something Regulus didn’t believe he himself had or could ever obtain. There was something inside Regulus that kept him back from truly loving others, from being selflessly kind. Any ambition he had was in his own favor. Anything nice he did was to gain something in return. He acknowledged this, even. Regulus knew in his heart of hearts that he was not a good person. That part of him believed he deserved what he got from Walburga. Even though he was the most obedient son, her perfect boy, Regulus was entirely convinced that every action performed against him was entirely warranted. 

Regulus skipped dinner that night. He hurried past his group of friends who were coming up from the dungeons just as he was going down against the grain. They all yelled after him, but Regulus ignored them. He couldn’t face them just yet. He couldn’t bear to break the truth to anyone else. They’d all react like Sirius had. They’d want to help and they’d pity him. Regulus couldn’t stand to be pitied. Instead, he isolated himself inside his dorm, choosing to let all the anger and pain slowly seep out of him. All he needed was a few hours to let his mind go blank. Then he’d be completely back to normal.

***

April 20, 1973

A few hours had turned into a full two weeks.

“Regulus. Reg!”

“Huh?”

“Are you listening to me?”

Regulus was lying on his stomach, pulling at a thread on his blanket. Robin stood over him, holding Karasi in her arms and petting the cat fondly.

“Erm, yeah.”

“No, you haven’t been this whole time,” Robin spoke plainly.

“Sorry.”

“What’s going on with you, Black?”

He shrugged lazily.

“You have to pack. The train leaves after breakfast tomorrow.”

Regulus hummed in agreement.

“Don’t forget, you’re coming to mine for the holiday.”

Regulus snapped his head up.

“I’m what?”

“You and Sirius are coming to spend Easter with my family. We’ve gone over this like three times, Reg. Your mother sent an owl a week ago.”

“Oh yeah.”

Regulus hadn’t the faintest idea what she was talking about.

“It’ll be fun, yeah?”

“Yeah, can’t wait.”

Robin sighed, letting Karasi slip from her arms.

“If you don’t want to come, you can just say so. I’m sure you’d much rather go back to London than spend a week with my family.”

And then it dawned on him. Regulus wasn’t going home. Walburga wouldn’t dare touch him in someone else’s home. His face lit up.

“No! No, I can’t wait to come over. It’s going to be great!”

The sudden change in mood caught Robin off guard. 

“Mmhmm… glad we agree,” she narrowed her eyes, uncertain by Regulus’ proclamation.

“So, what were you saying before?”

“Oh yeah,” Robin closed her eyes, trying to remember, “you need your dress robes.”

Regulus groaned.

“Also, I am telling you this not just as your friend, but as a concerned witch, please keep an eye on your brother this week.”

“Sirius can take care of himself.”

“Yes, but I need you to keep him from fighting with Michael.”

“You’re going to have to find someone to keep him from fighting with me.”

“You are perfectly capable of controlling yourself, Black. Just don’t instigate him.”

That was easier said than done.

Regulus changed the subject, “are you excited to be going home?”

Robin was suddenly quiet, she just shrugged. Regulus wondered if the Mulciber household was much like his own or the Burke’s. Robin never talked about home or her family much. Then again, most Slytherin students didn’t. The letter from Walburga hadn’t specifically stated as to why they were all spending the holiday with the Mulcibers. From what Regulus could recall, the Mulcibers were not a family Walburga typically associated with. The Burkes and the Rosiers, sure - but Regulus hadn’t ever heard the family name before coming to Hogwarts. They were not a part of the sacred twenty-eight and Regulus couldn’t help but wonder why.

“My home isn’t like Pandora’s, or yours,” Robin announced.

Regulus waited for her to continue.

She sighed, “see, my mum passed when I was very young. Her mother was a half-blood and since we don’t exactly come from money…”

“You’re worried your home isn’t pure enough?”

Robin nodded.

Yes, the fact her mother wasn’t a pure-blood was surprising, even more so that Robin technically wasn’t either. For some reason, that didn’t bother Regulus. Perhaps it should have. 

“Do you know why we’re spending the holiday with you?”

“Probably something to do with politics,” Robin spoke softly. 

“But a whole week? Not that I’m complaining, but why not just a dinner?”

“I guess there’s a lot to talk about.”

It didn’t really make sense.Walburga had to have known about the Mulciber’s blood status. To willingly spend a week with them made Regulus squirm; not because he cared one way or another, but because he was worried about what his mother would do as a response. 

Deciding that he actually had to pack, Regulus began gathering his belongings. Unlike the other boys, Regulus was uncommonly tidy. His laundry wasn’t thrown about, everything had a place, his bed was made every morning. It took him no time at all to collect his dress robes, casual clothing, and books for the week ahead. He and Robin had some papers to write, so at least he wouldn’t be bored. While he packed, Robin sat quietly at Regulus’ desk, watching him behind her enormous glasses. Regulus recalled their first time meeting; Robin had sat close to the train window, barely speaking unless spoken to. In their first few weeks at Hogwarts, they had hardly spoken to one another and were equally quick with their tempers. Though they were both still quiet individuals, they could talk freely with one another in a way Regulus had only been able to do with Sirius and Pandora. Working together in silence and just being in each other's company was never awkward, but rather comforting. In an unexpected turn of events, the two were hardly found without being in the presence of one another. 

“What’s it like?” Regulus asked, his back purposely turned towards Robin.

“Small, tidy, very plain.”

“Where do you live?”

“Just outside of Haverhill.”

“That’s not far from London.”

“Suppose not.”

The bit of apprehension in Robin’s tone was well detected. Silence fell between the two yet again. Regulus turned to face his friend who was now leaning over the back of his desk chair, with her chin on her arms, her long hair fanned over the back of the chair and her bangs hung just over her glasses. The green glow of the lake outside the windows was lighter than usual, less sickly and more whimsical. Regulus’ heart momentarily jumped into his throat, causing his breath to catch.

“What?” Robin asked, tilting her head to the side.

Just that slightest movement caused Regulus’ brain to go all fuzzy, though he hadn’t a clue as to why.

He shook the loose curls from his eyes, “nothing.”

“You were staring at me.”

Regulus turned his back again, “just got lost in thought, I guess.”

He could hear Robin hum from behind him. 

He pretended to sort through his trunk, not really having a task in mind. Regulus was unexpectedly dizzy and flustered. It couldn’t have been Robin making him feel that way - no, absolutely not. Though he struggled to fight the urge to look back over his shoulder. The boy was determined to rid himself of the unknown feelings which clouded his mind and quickened his breaths. It was ridiculous, stupid even, to have a crush on Robin. He wouldn’t allow it. 

Without warning, Robin was at his side, “do you need help?”

“No,” Regulus was a bit too quick to respond, his tone having a bit more bite than intended.

Robin took a step back, startled by Regulus’ unexpected temper.

“Well, you don’t have to be so rude about it! I was only trying to be kind.”

“I didn’t ask for your help.”

Regulus couldn’t help it. He knew he was wrong, that his aggression was being taken out on Robin unnecessarily, but it just poured out of him like a broken dam. Confused by his feelings and angry with his own behavior, Regulus continued to lash out.

“If you want to help, just leave me alone.”

A startled gasp escaped Robin’s mouth and her lip began to tremble. Regulus immediately regretted it, his own eyes beginning to tear up a bit, too. He wished he could have been better, but Regulus truly believed that he never could be. He’d always be destined to hurt others and do the wrong thing. No matter how hard he tried, how much he acknowledged his faults, he could never become the opposite of what he was. Sad, bitter, and irrationally cruel. In his eyes, everything Regulus did, everything he said, was unforgivable.

Chapter Text

April 25, 1973

Regulus Black had a particular talent for burning bridges at the most inopportune times. As expected, Sirius was justly pissed at him and occupied himself with loads of school work. Not to mention Robin wasn’t speaking to him either, which made for a joyous train ride back to London. The last person Regulus wanted to spend his free time with was Michael, though it seemed he had little choice in the matter. Michael Mulciber was a horrible child. How someone could be as slimy as Snape, as rambunctious as Sirius, as cunning as Barty, and as annoying as Evan, Regulus hadn’t a clue. Robin’s older brother was quiet and sneaky when he wanted to be, then outright obnoxious and in Regulus’ face in a mere moment. 

The Mulciber home was a small, dusty, brown brick structure on the edge of Haverhill. Unlike Grimmauld Place, or even the Burke Manor, there was hardly a sign of dark and creepy magical artifacts. Rather, the home was simply plain. Due to its small size, Regulus and Sirius had to share a room with Michael, while their parents took the only spare room. It was tight quarters and Michael really leaned into the brother’s feud. 

It started with little things, Regulus was always the first to wake up and while he was in the bathroom, Michael would steal something of his and of course Regulus would blame Sirius. Then the stolen item would suddenly reappear hours later. This happened on several occasions. Once that lost its fun, Michael began telling each of the boys an awful lie about what the other had said. Regulus had initially told Mulciber to “get lost,” but the hurtful words had already penetrated his impressionable mind. For the first few days in Haverhill, Regulus was completely convinced that Sirius had called him a “brown nosing dickhead.” 

More than anything in the world, Regulus wanted to go to Robin. He felt utterly alone and useless. The fact that the last thing he had spoken to Robin was to leave him alone, was the worst of it all. The idea of crawling back to her, with his tail between his legs, was humiliating. Regulus was getting exactly what he’d asked for. Even Walburga had left him alone. It was strange, having no formal meeting or guests arriving at the Mulciber home. Regulus had worn dress robes to Easter dinner, but there truly wasn’t a cause for it. Nobody else was there aside from the two small families. Perhaps Mulciber sr. had wanted to show some sort of pride in the presence of what he believed to be magic royalty. In truth, it was a total joke. 

The Mulcibers had no house elf, leaving Kreacher to do everything for them. It was not normal to have another wizarding family’s elf wait on you in your own home. Regulus had assumed this would send Walburga spiraling, but she didn’t care a bit. For the first time in a long time, Walburga Black seemed anxious. As did Orion. Not about being in someone else’s home, but about something very distant. The children still had not been informed why the Black’s were spending the week in Haverhill, and the adults hardly conversed. 

On the fifth night, Sirius had rolled over to face Regulus. The two had barely slept since their arrival. Though Grimmauld Place wasn’t the stuff of fairy tale dreams, it sure beat sleeping on Michael’s hardwood floors. It was a clear night, allowing the light of the quarter moon to flood the tiny bedroom. Regulus could easily tell that his brother’s eyes were open, though he attempted to hide his own behind his hair. 

“I know you’re awake, Reg.”

“Shut up.”

“Do you think something weird is going on?”

Regulus allowed this question to hang in the air for a moment. It was a rather broad question. The answer was “yes” in almost every way he spun it. 

He sighed, “what do you think is going on?”

“Something weird.”

Regulus groaned.

“So what’s happening with you and lady Mulciber?”

“ Nothing. ”

“Gathered that. You haven’t spoken this whole time.”

“It’s none of your business.”

“Fine. What do you think is going on, huh?”

“I don’t know, S. But yeah, something weird I ‘spose.”

“Will you two shut it !” Michael whisper-shouted from his bed, sounding more annoyed than anything.

Regulus rolled his eyes, “mum’s been losing it a bit, it seems. She’s been practically sweating since we got here.”

“I noticed that, too.”

“We can’t ask about it, though.”

“No, definitely not.”

“Right.”

“If you two don’t go to sleep right now, I will hex your pants to give you unpickable wedgies for the rest of your lives,” Mulciber mumbled into his pillow.

That was a threat Regulus knew the older boy could uphold. He and Sirius went to sleep without another word spoken.

***

April 27, 1973

The final night in Haverhill was a particularly quiet one. All of the assignments sent for the holiday had been completed, and the four Hogwarts students were left with nothing to do. With their parents locked away in the dining room likely discussing something unbearable, the kids took to the small parlor. Robin was sat in the corner, scribbling away in her journal, while Michael lounged upside down on an armchair blowing a single feather into the air with his mouth repeatedly. To Regulus’ annoyance, Sirius was pacing the tiny room furiously, with a small silver mirror in his hands. Always so vain , Regulus rolled his eyes. The young Slytherin tried his hardest to focus on the book he was reading, but his eyes kept wandering to Robin. He was so curious to know what was in her books, he couldn’t help it.

Lost in thought and clearly not paying attention to anything else around him, Regulus was startled as Robin’s head snapped up from her book, her eyes wide with fear. She threw the book down and marched straight towards Regulus. Sitting up eagerly, Regulus was happy to have Robin’s attention, even if it was just to berate him. As Robin got closer, Regulus quickly realized her gaze was set beyond him. Robin walked right past the boy, instead coming right up to Sirius’ side. Sirius looked just as startled and confused as Regulus felt.

“We have a problem,” Robin grabbed the older Black’s arm and dragged him out of the room.

Michael looked at Regulus, the feather balanced between his eyes. The two just stared at one another for a moment before frantically scrambling after their siblings. Out in the hall, Sirius looked just as distraught as Robin, as the girl spoke to him in hushed tones. 

“What’s going on?” it was the first thing Regulus had said to Robin in days.

She spun on him, “ get out !” she pushed Regulus into Michael, sending both boys tumbling backwards.

“What the hell, Robin?” Michael was shouting.

Sirius was in front of Robin, “get lost, Mulciber. We don’t need your shite right now.”

The way Sirius was standing defensively in front of Robin, as if he were about to pounce, was something Regulus had never seen before. Sirius and Robin had never even spoken to each other before as far as Regulus was concerned. It didn’t make any sense. 

Michael’s fists were clenched as he advanced towards Sirius. It took a moment for Regulus to realize what was going on, but he was able to jump in between the two older boys before anything too hazardous happened. Being taller than Sirius, Regulus was able to block Michael’s view of his brother. 

“Relax, Michael,” Regulus put his hands up defensively.

“Get out of my way, Black. I have no problem pounding the shite out of you and your brother.”

“You will do no such thing,” Walburga was at the end of the hall, her chin up as she spoke calmly, “come along.”

There was no denying an order from Walburga Black. All four of the children silently followed her to the dining room, though Robin looked like she was going to be sick. They sat quietly in the small, under furnished room. Orion and Mulciber sr. were seated at each head of the table, both looking bored and uninterested. Not that Regulus would dare say something in that moment, but he couldn’t help but feel a slight tingling in his lips and his mouth refused to open. He, and the others, were purposefully being silenced. Sirius and Robin maintained eye contact, a frantic look on both of their faces. 

“I’m sure you’ve all been wondering why the Mulcibers so graciously allowed us in their home this week,” Walburga began.

As no one was able to respond, she continued, “maintaining blood purity is one of, if not the most important responsibilities wizarding families must uphold. Though it is no secret the Mulciber name has been dragged through the mud for generations,”

Merlin, what is she doing? Regulus squirmed in his seat.

“We have come to the conclusion that it would be in all of our best interests to join our families.”

Sirius shifted in his seat, eyes bulging. He wanted to get up, to shout, to do anything - Regulus could tell. The strong hold Walburga had on all of them only made Sirius struggle more. Robin had paled greatly, her shoulders shook slightly but she maintained her composure. 

“Though it is still so early on in your lives, this formality will last quite a while before coming to fruition.”

Silence.

“Once Robin comes of age, she and Sirius are to be wed in order to unify our houses and maintain power and balance in the wizarding community.”

Regulus felt the seal on his lips release. Dread consumed him. 

“You can’t do this!” Sirius was on his feet.”

“I already have,” the corner of Walburga’s mouth twitched.

“It’s settled and that’s final,” Orion slammed his fist on the table, causing everyone to jump, “Once the Mulciber girl finishes her NEWTS, you will be married. There is no changing that.”

All eyes were fixed on Orion. Then from the opposite end of the table, came a loud and boisterous laugh. Michael was doubled over, clutching his sides. Snorting and crying as if he’d never laughed before in his life.

He turned to face his younger sister, “you’re fucking stuck now, sis.”

“Michael!” Mulciber sr. berated his son, but Regulus hardly heard a thing.

Sirius was arguing with Walburga and Orion, while Michael bickered with his own father. Robin and Regulus stared at each other from across the table, both centered in all the chaos. Robin looked as if the life was sucked right out of her. She didn’t cry or yell or stand up for herself. She just took it. There was no getting out of it. Walburga’s wishes were practically law. Regulus and Robin both knew that. There was nothing either of them could do.

***

April 28, 1973

“Did you see the Prophet?” Pettigrew ran into the compartment.

“Why? Did the Chudley Cannons lose again?” James asked without looking up from English to Welsh for Beginners . 

“There were multiple attacks in London this week. Not far from Grimmauld Place.”

This caught Sirius and Regulus’ attention. 

Peter held up the paper, “not only was there a vampire killing spree, but it says here that dark wizards publicly tortured and killed at least three muggles outside of their London homes. The wizards have yet to be caught and a dozen ministry employees were tasked with altering memories and rounding up any muggles who could have seen something.”

Sirius snatched up the paper, “this happened two blocks from home, Reggie!”

“Are the attacks connected?” Regulus could hardly force the words to come out.

“They think so, but it hasn’t been confirmed,” Peter flopped down next to James, visibly exasperated. 

After the whole marriage proposal fiasco the night before, Sirius and Regulus were both extremely weary of Walburga. They had gone to bed without any supper, miserable yet eager to return to Hogwarts. Fortunately, Robin was speaking to Regulus again, though not in the capacity he would have preferred. It was just little things, not real conversation. When they boarded the train that morning, she had gone off to find Pandora, saying she was eager to make things right. Meanwhile, Regulus felt a strong urge to stick by his brother and willingly joined his friends on the ride back to Hogwarts.

Sirius turned to Regulus after scanning over the article, “do you think this is why we didn’t go home for the holiday?”

Regulus gulped, having a sneaking suspicion that was exactly the reason. If the Blacks had an alibi for where they were during the attacks, nobody could even think to connect it to them, had they been connected at all. Surely with all the power and knowledge their parents possessed, they had to have known something . The idea was sickening.

“Sirius, yesterday when Robin took you into the hall-”

“She had a vision,” Sirius confirmed, “she saw Walburga making the announcement as they had all agreed to it, I guess.”

“Right,” Regulus tried to look anywhere but at Sirius.

“Does she do that a lot?”

“I don’t know.”

In truth, he didn’t. All he knew of Robin’s abilities was that she couldn’t force herself to see the future. She could be having visions every other day, but Regulus hadn’t a clue. He never thought to ask.

“Your friend is a seer?” Remus slid closer to Sirius, leaning slightly over him. 

Had it been Regulus, Remus’ lack of judgment in regard to Sirius’ personal space would have wigged him out. Instead, Sirius appeared to lean into his friend. They weren’t touching, but they were far too close for Regulus’ comfort. Neither of the boys seemed to mind, let alone notice.

“Erm, yeah…” Regulus felt as if the older boy was invading his own privacy.

“Does she struggle with- with being different from other witches?”

What an odd question. 

“I have no idea. Why don’t you ask Sybill about it, she doesn’t shut up about her great great grandmother or whatever she is to her.”

The older Ravenclaw girl was well known throughout Hogwarts, not for being a seer, but for claiming to be one. She wouldn’t shut up about it, yet she had hardly produced an accurate prediction nor a prophecy in all her time at Hogwarts.

Remus shrugged, “Sybill seems comfortable enough.”

“Uh-huh,” Regulus was unsure where Lupin was going with that. 

“Born abilities are just really interesting, I guess. I want to know how she manages it.”

“I’ll um get back to you on that.”

This seemed to satisfy Lupin. He sat back in his seat and began unwrapping a bit of muggle chocolate.

That night at dinner, the afternoon edition of the Prophet was eagerly being passed around the room. Murmurs bubbled from each of the house tables until there was a dull roar in the air. By the time the papers had reached the end of the Slytherin table, Robin was a deep shade of red and made a noise similar to a wounded animal as she scanned the front page.

Mulciber Daughter Set to Marry Black Heir Upon NEWTS Completion

“Robin, you’re famous,” Rosier joked.

She threw the paper aside, “hardly.”

Regulus scoffed as he read the article, “they did this on purpose!”

Before Robin could ask what he meant, Barty interjected, “you’re going to marry that blood traitor ?”

Regulus’ eyes narrowed.

Robin only shrugged, “it has to be done.”

How she was being so calm about it all made Regulus’ blood boil. Aside from Sirius being his brother and any feelings Regulus may or may not have for Robin, it was horrible for anyone to be forced into a marriage. Not to mention they were children . It was all a big distraction from the attacks in London, Regulus was sure of it.

“You know, Slughorn is going to have a cow.”

“Why would Professor Slughorn care?” Robin asked.

Barty waved his fork, “ Selena . Her and Sirius have this weird thing going on.”

Regulus hadn’t dared to ask his brother about that. He opted to keep the image of those two together out of his head as much as possible. It hadn’t even occurred to Regulus how others would take the news. Just as Barty had made the point about Selena, she began causing a scene. 

The only times Regulus had seen a girl, or even a grown woman, so angry was either with his own mother or with Bellatrix. Selena Slughorn was a close contender in “angriest witch known to magic kind.” As she threw the Prophet down, her fist slammed into one of the ceramic dinner plates, causing it to shatter. She stood from the Slytherin table with such force, she set multiple glasses toppling over. Having few Slytherin friends, her gaggle of Hufflepuff accomplices hurried over to her, soothing the emotional witch. The girls could hardly contain Selena when she finally caught Robin’s eye. 

Regulus half expected his friend to take off out of the Great Hall, but she stayed seated. To his surprise, a small smirk was forming on Robin’s lips. Selena rushed forward, pulling out her wand as she came closer. Fully aware of what was going on, Regulus, Barty, and Evan all had their hands on their wands under the table. There was nothing Selena could do that they wouldn’t be able to defend. 

“ You ,” Selena pointed her wand at Robin, “you can’t just steal him away!”

“I haven’t the faintest idea of what you’re talking about.”

“Sirius Black is mine ,” the absurdity of Selena’s statement made Regulus snort.

“Something funny, Black?” Selena popped her gum, an eyebrow slightly raised in question.

“Clearly, you don’t know my brother as well as you think you do. Sirius can’t belong to anyone, he’s too much of a free spirit.”

Everyone knew that Sirius Black did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. This arrangement was simply Walburga’s latest attempt at controlling her rebellious heir. In Regulus’ gut, he knew Robin and Sirius could never end up together. Perhaps that’s why Robin was taking it all so well. Sure, it was horrid at the moment, dealing with it all, but perhaps Robin knew something nobody else did. There was a good chance of that. Selena fumbled over her words; even she knew how much truth there was to Regulus’ statement.

Stuttering and fuming, the older Slytherin just marched right out of the Great Hall, followed by her band of Hufflepuffs (who all made sure to glare in Robin’s direction). Evan was cracking up, clearly amused by the entire situation. Barty went back to his dinner as if nothing had happened. That was it. Robin didn’t say anything else about it and the rest of the Hogwarts students resumed their previous conversations. But that wasn’t good enough for Regulus.

Something absolutely bizarre was afoot. Their trip to Haverhill while there were attacks on muggle London were no coincidence. Robin and Sirius’ arrangement was meant to lead curious eyes away from the incident and get people talking. The article even made sure to note that Robin was not a pure blood, that the Mulcibers were not a part of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, and that by marrying the two families there was “great hope for the future of the wizarding community.” It was ridiculous and clearly planned. Robin had to have known that. Again, Regulus tried to ask her what she knew, but this time he was interrupted by Pandora. 

“I want to apologize for how I’ve been treating you,” she began, her hair fading to blue, “I should have believed you when you told me what was going on. I’m sorry I’ve let you deal with this all on your own.”

Robin stiffened, “I haven’t been on my own.”

Pandora looked at the three boys who surrounded Robin, they were her friends, too.

“Right. Then I’d like to apologize to all of you. I don’t know the extent of what you’ve been dealing with and I ran when it got hard. I shouldn’t have abandoned my friends.”

Barty hardly looked up, “apology accepted, though unnecessary. Reggie, here should be apologizing to you .”

All eyes turned to Regulus. He knew this would have to happen eventually.

Taking in a deep breath, he looked to Pandora first, “the way I spoke to you was horrific and despicable and I’m very sorry, Pandora.”

It was the first thing he’d said to her in months. She just nodded, unsure of how to respond.

“Robin, I shouldn’t have taken my frustration out on you. I know it wasn’t the first time and I screwed up. I can’t tell you how sorry I am. To both of you, I am really truly sorry.”

Pandora nodded and smiled a bit, “thank you, Regulus.”

Robin just stared at him blankly.

“I told you back in October that I don’t forgive easily, Black. I told you not to treat us so horribly, yet that is exactly what you’ve done,” the young witch’s face was stone cold.

“I know,” Regulus dropped his head slightly, his curls falling into his eyes.

“Oh, come on Robin, let’s all just go back to the way things were. Everyone’s apologized now, right?” Pandora tried to make light of the situation.

“Yes, okay, fine,” Robin sighed, sliding over to make room for Pandora to sit.

As children do, they learned to forgive and forget. Though Robin never really forgave and certainly the other boys never allowed Regulus to forget, but from that moment on, everything was good. Everything was as it should be. They were all speaking again, laughing and happy to be in each other's presence. Even with all the jovial banter, there was something in the air Regulus couldn’t ignore and he knew the others felt it, too. Something wasn’t right, yet for the time being, they chose to ignore it. Unfortunately, ignoring a problem only makes it worse, and the worst was still yet to come.

Chapter Text

May 22, 1973

Regulus’ twelfth birthday fell on a Tuesday. Better than a Monday perhaps, but not nearly as good as a Thursday or Friday. Regulus had been very adamant about his friends not doing anything special for him. In his eyes, the best birthday would be a peaceful one. He had no desire for extravagant gift giving or singing during meal times. The last thing Regulus Black needed was the entire castle’s attention set upon him and only him. That was better left to Sirius.

Compared to the previous year, Sirius went above and beyond for Regulus’ birthday. It was absolutely the last thing the young Black wanted. As everyone knew, there was no stopping Sirius once he set his mind to something. Being a naturally early riser, Regulus was often the first one to arrive to breakfast everyday. Somehow, Sirius and his gang beat him to it. The four of them were seated at the Slytherin table; Sirius and James both looked too pleased for comfort. Every bone in Regulus’ body was screaming at him to turn around and leave, but the deep growl in his stomach prevented that. 

“Mornin’ Reg!” Sirius was grinning as hard as ever, “happy birthday!”

“Er, thanks, S.”

Rather awkwardly, Regulus slid in beside his brother. On the table was a hideous pink cake, decorated as if a child had thrown it together. If it hadn’t been for the color, Regulus wouldn’t have paid the cake much mind, but it caught his attention as did the words scribbled on the top. 

“ Get well soon grandma ! Sirius, where did you get this cake?”

All four of the Gryffindor boys burst out laughing.

“It’s a secret,” Sirius snorted, “go on, have some.”

“I’m not sure if I should…” Regulus slid a bit further away from his brother.

“Oh come on, we haven’t poisoned you,” Remus gave him a crooked grin. 

For some reason, Regulus trusted Lupin. Perhaps it was his calm demeanor; unlike his other friends, Lupin wasn’t as wild as Sirius and James nor was he as timid as Peter. He was just kind . Though his experiences with Sirius’ friend were limited, Regulus could spot pure goodness as easily as a Bowtruckle could pick a lock. Regulus had heard other students, mainly Snape, go on about Lupin’s scars and how menacing he looked. Rumors about what the boy got up to when he returned to his muggle home on breaks were full of street fights and animal wrangling. Regulus didn’t believe any of it, but there was no denying the curious nature of Remus Lupin. Needless to say, Regulus was intrigued.

“Right,” Regulus picked up a knife and cut himself a slice, “what, no singing?”

“Not just yet.”

“We’re starting off tame,” James added.

“Great,” Regulus mumbled.

To his surprise, the cake was quite good despite its looks.

“So really, where’d you get it?”

“Nicked it,” Sirius shrugged.

“From where ? You can’t leave the castle.”

The oddest tangible silence followed Regulus’ words. Pettigrew was fumbling uneasily with the sleeves of his robes, while Potter refused to take his eyes off the floating candles above.

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Well some poor grandmother isn’t getting her cake now, is she?”

At this, Lupin laughed.

“I know it’s not from the kitchen, the elves wouldn’t produce a cake this heinous.”

Lupin leaned across the table, “there are secret tunnels that lead out of the castle.”

“Moony!” 

James threw a hand over his mouth in shock while Peter’s eyes practically fell out of his head.

“It’s not a secret if you tell everyone!” Sirius hissed.

“It’s not as if I told him where .”

“So what? You snuck into Hogsmeade and stole me a cake?”

“Precisely.”

It was the most Sirius thing Regulus had ever experienced. 

“That’s actually kind of nice. Thank you.”

Since returning to Hogwarts after the Spring holiday, Regulus hadn’t spoken to Sirius at all. Sure, he might have been expecting a prank or two from his brother, but not an entire cake. Nor had Regulus expected all of Sirius’ friends to join in. Of course he was grateful, but a large part of him felt like he didn’t deserve it. Not the attention, or the cake, or the kindness. It actually made him a bit angry. Regulus hadn’t asked for a birthday cake- he hadn’t asked for anything. For Sirius and his friends to go out of their way for Regulus was undeniably nice, but horribly annoying and unwarranted. 

“So what’re your plans for today, Reg?”

“Go to class,” Regulus took another bite of cake.

“I haven’t missed an invitation to some party have I?”

Regulus glared at his brother, “it’s Tuesday.”

“Hasn’t stopped us before,” James smirked.

“Come on then, really you have nothing planned?”

“I’m planning to go to class.”

Regulus couldn’t understand why his brother was so persistent.

“If you say so,” Sirius took a fork and dug right into the side of the cake. 

How Sirius ended up so uncivilized was beyond Regulus. It’s like he’s a dog . Regulus grimaced at the large dent taken out of the side of the round cake. One would think, having the same upbringing would result in similar table manners. Apparently not. 

The other boys helped themselves to cake after Regulus insisted on it. He did not want his friends walking in to see the monstrosity. Once other students started to arrive, Sirius and his friends said their goodbyes, wished Regulus another happy birthday, and returned to their own table. All evidence of their presence and the cake were gone by the time the rest of the Slytherin first years arrived.

The rest of the day went just as Regulus had hoped. No big surprises, no screaming banshees, just a normal Tuesday in May. By the time dinner had rolled around, Regulus had received an owl from his parents. To his delight, he received twice his normal allowance in Galleons and the message along with it was brief (this was the best gift of all in Regulus’ eyes). Everything was going so well, maybe a little too well, as dinner came to a close. Just before Dumbledore dismissed everyone, explosions resembling dungbombs started going off everywhere. A thick pink fog filled the Great Hall and the smell of mothballs penetrated everyone’s noses. For a moment, Regulus couldn’t even see his own hand in front of his face. The fog lifted and the results were startling. Rather than dungbombs, dozens of granny-bombs had been set off. All the students’ robes were turned various shades of pink, complete with frilly white lace and bonnets. Some students had been given gray wigs, while others wore glasses or leaned on walkers. Even the professors had been affected. Professor McGonagall looked quite cross as she stared out into the crowd through a newly acquired monocle. 

“Oh! Isn’t this lovely!” Umbridge squealed, admiring her new pink robes, “I loathe pranksters, but this has actually brightened my mood quite a bit.”

The other first years groaned in response, though Pandora did look a bit pleased with the outcome as she had turned her hair pink in appreciation. Robin, however, had sunk halfway under the table, mortified by her old lady robes and gray wig. The birthday cake that morning was starting to make sense to Regulus. As realization set in, he couldn’t help but laugh. Looking over to the Gryffindors, he saw Sirius doubled over a walker pretending to be elderly while others pointed and laughed around him. It was the first and only prank Sirius had pulled off that Regulus wasn’t embarrassed about. Regulus almost scared himself with how hilarious he found the whole ordeal. Well, there’s a first for everything .

***

May 25, 1973

Come May, Regulus had become overwhelmed with school work for the first time all year. As was everyone else. The return from Easter break greeted the students with essays due in every subject on top of their normal assignments. The work was easy enough - for Regulus, at least. There was just so much of it. With June swiftly approaching, so were their final exams. Barty was doing his best to keep his friend’s heads above water, but even he had enough on his plate.

“Barty, what do you have on Uric the Oddball?”

“Crouch, can I see your notes on the Gargoyle Strike of 1911?”

“Anything on Emeric the Sinful?”

“It’s Emeric the Evil .”

“So you do have notes on him?”

“What the deal with these self-stirring cauldrons?”

“ Will you all just shut up! ” Barty groaned in frustration, “have any of you taken notes at all this year?”

Pandora twirled her purple hair sheepishly, “yes, but you’re just so much more organized than the rest of us.”

The small band of Slytherins were spread out on the carpet of the boy’s dormitory. Books and parchment were thrown around them wildly. It had gotten to the point where everyone’s notes were jumbled together and it was difficult to tell what belonged to who. Regulus, however, had been keeping track of everything that was being passed back and forth and knew very well where everyone’s items were. 

“History of Magic is easy, Dora, don’t worry about it,” Regulus skimmed through his own notes for Potions. 

“Yes, please , bother Black for his history notes,” Crouch returned to his Transfiguration essay.

“They’re always smudged, he’s left-handed you know.”

“I can write more cleanly when I’m not rushed, thank you! May I remind you, my handwriting is the neatest here when I’m actually trying.”

“There’s a very easy solution to all of this,” Robin announced, setting down her book, “I’ll give my potions notes to Black, Black gives his history notes to Pandora, Pandora gives her Transfiguration notes to Barty-”

“I don’t need her notes.”

Robin rolled her eyes, but continued, “Barty gives his Charms notes to Evan, Evan gives his Defense Against the Dark Arts notes to me. Leaving just Herbology and Astronomy, which I believe we’ve all completed already, yes?”

There was a simultaneous “yes” in response.

“Good, so let’s trade.”

And trade they did. It actually worked out surprisingly well. Into the night they studied and scribbled away. They had all agreed to attempt to finish all of their assignments in one go, leaving their final weeks for relaxation and recreation. The final Quidditch match of the season and the Quidditch Cup was the following day - Slytherin against Gryffindor. None of them wanted thoughts of homework hanging over their heads as they approached the pitch. Since all of the more senior Slytherins were worried about Quidditch, OWLS, and NEWTS, nobody came to bother the small group of first years at all that night. Avery had strolled in at some point, mocked them for being swots, and then left for the rest of the night. Merlin only knows what he got up to out of sight of everyone else. Florian had come in a few times to ask them questions and then would report back to Lauren and Dorcas, who were out studying in the common room. Other than that, they were not bothered to turn out the lights or to go to bed.

***

May 26, 1973

When the sun rose the following morning, the light which reflected within the lake slowly illuminated the boy’s dormitory. When Regulus woke, a small bit of parchment was stuck to his cheek, leaving inked words on his skin. He could feel a small weight on his back and rolled over to find Karasi had fallen asleep on top of him. They had all fallen asleep on the rug, curled up in their robes and using books for pillows. Robin’s glasses were on the floor, just out of reach of her finger tips. Evan was on his back, snoring softly. Barty had one arm draped across Evan. The sight made Regulus laugh softly to himself. Pandora, however, had been first to rise, as she was sitting in the windowsill closest to Regulus’ bed, with her knees up to her chin.

Regulus climbed up into the window, but Pandora didn’t even spare him a glance. Her eyes were locked onto something deep within the lake.

“Hey,” Regulus whispered.

Pandora hardly looked in his direction, “hi.”

“What’s going on?”

She sighed and brought her knees in tighter, “I don’t want the term to end. I want to stay at Hogwarts forever.”

“Yeah… me, too.”

“Do you have plans for the summer?”

Regulus shook his head.

The others, mainly the boys, had been eager to see what the summer had planned for them all. According to Malfoy, they’d all be seeing a lot of each other. He hadn’t given any more information other than that. The few letters Regulus had sent to his mother were either ignored entirely or given very brief responses. As the summer approached, a mixed sense of impending doom and curiosity overwhelmed Regulus. The others didn’t feel it, though. Crouch was eager to participate. After Regulus’ report on the train and Evan’s vouching for his best friend, Lucius had included Barty in many private conversations. Rather than keeping their distance from the older boys, as they once did, Evan and Barty became quite familiar with Snape, Mulciber, and Burke. Even Avery. Regulus didn’t like it one bit.

“I think my father has found some kind of wizard law which will require my mother to return to the manor. Meaning I will, too.”

“Well, that’s good, yeah? We can actually write to each other and see each other.”

“I suppose.”

“Have you spoken to Prometheus at all?”

The oldest Burke sibling had gone unusually quiet since their return from the Easter holiday. He had noticeably stayed out of the prank war between Sirius’ friends and the second year Slytherins. The obvious explanation was that Prometheus was focusing on Quidditch and keeping up with the extra courses all third years took on. Maybe everyone else had been blind to it, but Regulus couldn’t help but notice the hushed conversations between Burke and Malfoy, and how close Prometheus and Robert Wilkes - a slimy and moronic fourth year - had become. 

“A bit,” she admitted, “he’s different now. S’pose father’s gotten to him somehow, scared him into behaving as he’d like him to. But he’s gone back on everything he said last year. It doesn’t make any sense.”

“People change.”

The look Pandora flashed him was not a glare, but more so a hurt and questioning stare. Her large blue eyes looked as far away as they possibly could. It was unnerving and impossible for Regulus to understand.

“Just because we’re pure bloods does not mean we need to behave disrespectfully and arrogant; I never understood that mindset. Neither did Prometheus until he began his third year. People don’t suddenly change their beliefs like that.”

“Why be disrespectful and arrogant when we could just ignore half-bloods and mudbloods all the same? I don’t want to be mean but I just don’t partially care for their kind in general. We tolerate them here at school and I behave amicably when I have to. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

Truly, Regulus believed every word he said. He didn’t find half-bloods and mudbloods particularly dirty and disgraceful as much as Walburga would like him to- he just simply didn’t care. The way mudbloods were treated in the halls of Hogwarts was a bit much, Regulus could agree. Violence for violence sake was something Walburga had indirectly taught Regulus to despise. People like Snape and Robin didn’t bother him, they knew what they were and chose to follow their pure blood heritage, rather than parade how different they were. Regulus admired that. Witches like Lily Evans, whom Regulus admittedly found quite brilliant and fun, embraced her muggle upbringing. This is what made her touch quite unbearable. 

Regulus knew one day his mother would arrange his marriage, much like she had with Sirius, and the pure blood line would continue. Of course, Regulus could never even imagine willingly courting a muggle born witch. That was undoubtedly out of the question. Sirius and Robin’s arrangement had to have been a joke, a ruse to turn everyone’s attention elsewhere. Walburga would never allow Sirius to marry a half-blood, no matter the circumstances. 

“Are you upset with the marriage arrangement?” It was as if Pandora had read his mind. 

A deep pit in his stomach began to form as he tried to think of what to say. Since the announcement was made in the Prophet, nobody spoke about it except Selena. Regulus had been working very hard to forget about it. He hadn’t even spoken to Sirius about it, either. Everyone involved was trying to forget and move on.

“I don’t think it’s fair,” Regulus finally mustered.

Even though Regulus was positively sure Walburga would not uphold the arrangement, it still put a sour taste in his mouth.

“It’s not,” Pandora agreed, “but are you okay ?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

Pandora sucked in her lip, her hair slowly turned to green before she shook it away.

“Well, I thought you and Robin-”

Oh no.

“No. No, it’s nothing. There’s nothing,” Regulus shook his head, “I mean Robin ?” He stuck out his tongue, “no way.”

“Okay.”

“She’s my friend. It’s like- it would be the same if it were you in place of her. You know?”

Pandora was slightly taken aback by this, “oh?”

“If you and Sirius were arranged it would be the exact same thing. Actually, I’m surprised it wasn’t you. I mean, two sacred families, it would have made sense.”

Pandora’s face grew redder and redder with each word.

“It would be horrid, of course, but I wouldn’t particularly mind .”

“Right,” Pandora kept her eyes glued to the window.

“I can’t see my mother following through and Robin has a plan, I think.”

“She doesn’t want it, that’s for sure.”

“Marriage is horrid.”

The words were out before Regulus had really thought about the meaning behind them. He hadn’t even realized he felt that way until he said it. How awful it must be to be bound to someone forever; a constant burden looming over one's head to provide an heir and spending so much energy on hating one another. That was not a fate Regulus desired.

“Marriage is not horrid,” Pandora shockingly protested.

“Really? How many married people do you know who don’t absolutely despise one another?”

“The Weasleys.”

Regulus rolled his eyes.

“I met Lovegood’s family over the Christmas holiday.”

“I didn’t know that! They must be mad . Tell me, how absurd were they?”

“They were lovely, thank you very much!” Pandora swatted Regulus’ leg.

“So aside from blood traitors and lunatics, how many happy married people do you know?”

“I suppose not many,” Pandora responded stiffly.

Regulus turned to face the window, “love is a joke. Well, romantic love at least. I suppose I love all of you, and Sirius if I must. But no one can truly love someone forever. It’s absurd.”

“I think you’re wrong about that. You can love your friends and nothing more all your life, but there will always be a longing for something deeper within your soul. The desire to share all you are with someone, with no secrets, no judgment, so much tender care and patience, will one day consume you and it may be too late.”

Regulus was stunned into silence.

“I don’t want that for you, Regulus. Please promise me you’ll try to find a way to love.”

A sudden uneasy tightness had formed in Regulus’ chest and little goosebumps had spread across his arms. He didn’t want to love anyone. Why would Pandora be so insistent on this? Yet her words made so much sense. Pandora had set gears into motion which had never worked a day in Regulus’ life until that moment. Merlin, did it scare him.

“If love is using an unforgivable on the person you’re meant to cherish forever, I think I’ll pass.”

“ What? ”

“Nothing,” Regulus pushed the bottom half of his face into his knees.

He hadn't meant to let that secret slip, he just couldn’t help it.

“No, Regulus, tell me what you mean by that.”

“I’d rather not.”

It was taking everything in him not to snap, to lash out. He was trying so hard to be good. Please, Pandora, don’t push it . He squeezed his eyes shut, but behind his lids all he could see was Orion standing over Walburga’s damaged form. 

“Fine.”

Regulus breathed out a sigh of relief. 

“Oi!” Evan’s sleepy shout startled both Regulus and Pandora, “is it time for Quidditch yet?”

“Still a few more hours, Rose,” Pandora smiled gently.

Evan rubbed his eyes, his movement causing Barty to stir, “don’t call me that.”

“What, Rose ? It’s just so pretty, I can’t help it,” Pandora was grinning now. 

“It’s girly.”

Pandora waved him off.

“I quite like it,” Barty yawned.

“Oh, fuck off,” Evan sleepily shoved Crouch. 

Robin was now awake, searching the floor for her glasses.

“Shall we go to breakfast?” she asked, fastening her lenses across her deeply blushing face.

She must have slept right on her text books, Regulus thought. All of them had awoken with marks across their cheeks from their uncomfortable slumber. There was no other explanation for the redness which consumed the girl’s complexion. 

***

It was exhilarating to see Narcissa actually eager for the Quidditch Cup, rather than debilitatingly nervous. There would be no tea cup shattering that morning. The Slytherin seeker’s eyes were bright and alert, a mischievous smile played on her lips, and she was positively energetic. Her good mood was infectious, putting all the Slytherins in high spirits. For the first time in forever, Regulus felt alive . It was absurd to say out loud, even to think, but at that moment Regulus felt like he could run a marathon and do so happily. Not many others knew it, but Regulus was sure it was due to Narcissa’s abilities. The joy and energy didn’t feel artificial though, Regulus felt very much in control of his emotions. Either he was truly ecstatic (which was unlikely) or Cissy’s powers were on overload. Regardless, it was a win.  

Slytherin hadn’t won the Quidditch Cup in years and it had been a rocky season coming into the 1973 final. With the first match resulting in Narcissa’s injuries, there was a lot to make up for. The following matches had relied heavily on Narcissa catching the snitch before the other team got too far ahead. With Malfoy as keeper and Cissy as seeker, they were a determined and terrifying duo. During the regular season match between Slytherin and Gryffindor, Narcissa had caught the snitch just seconds before Richard Carter scored what would have been Gryffindor’s leading goal. Had Carter scored before Narcissa caught the snitch, Slytherin would have lost simply due to points. It had been a nail biter to say the least. 

Coming into the Quidditch Cup, Slytherin had only lost one match and that was their first. However, that didn’t stop everyone from heckling Narcissa about her concussion. As the teams marched onto the pitch, the Ravenclaw spectators began cheering, “nutty Narcissa the most bonkers of Blacks,” over and over again. As it would seem, her head injuries from the fall were not easily forgotten. There were even signs reading “as mad as a hatter” with “hatter” crossed out in a thick red line and replaced with “seeker.” Even from way up in the stands, Regulus saw Narcissa staring. Once the whistle blew, she was up in the air and far from any negative cheering. 

Only five minutes in, one of the Gryffindor beaters had to be pulled from the game. Goyle was playing dirty (dirtier than anyone had truly realized) and sent a bludger straight into the back of the other guy’s head. There would be no end to the head trauma jokes after that. Though one of Gryffindor’s top players was taken out, this meant Sirius was going in. During the entire season, Sirius saw about 1 minute of actual play time. He was not at all equipped to go in for the entire Quidditch Cup match with no real experience. That much was evident the second he got into the air. Sirius was a great flier, there was no doubt about it, but Merlin was he shaking like a leaf on that broom. 

Honestly, seeing Sirius up there struggling to keep one hand steady on his broom and the other tightly clutching his bat, would have been funny had it not been the House Cup. Crabbe and Goyle wasted no time at all ganging up on him. At first they had just abandoned their positions to mess with Sirius, but their jokes soon became violent. In an effort to avoid another incident, Hooch was watching Crabbe and Goyle like a hawk. Several times she stopped the match to card or scold the two Slytherin beaters. Eventually, Sirius got the hang of things and was back to his cocky self. 

There was no denying the power behind both teams; they had both made it to the final with nothing except pure talent. Even with Malfoy blocking a record breaking amount of goals, the score was being passed back and forth quite consistently. Watching Potte score on Malfoy was actually pretty amusing. Regulus had to hide his smirk behind his hands. Meanwhile, Burke and Vanity were giving Longbottom a run for his galleons on the other end of the pitch. For a second year, he was holding his own remarkably well. Really, there was little to no indicator of who would win. 

The Quidditch Cup came down entirely to who would catch the golden snitch. Fortunately for Narcissa, Gryffindor’s B team seeker had been moved up to A team after the previous student quit the team to focus on her NEWTS. Katie Carter was a tiny second year, with a slim athletic build and a newer broom model, she was wicked fast. Speed wasn’t everything, though. Narcissa had years to develop a strategy, to train her eyes and learn the seemingly random movements of the snitch. In all fairness, Narcissa was not competing with Katie, she was competing with the ball. The match was almost becoming boring, watching both teams inflate the score. 

“Someone end it, please !” Evan shouted through cupped hands.

His plea was met with numerous sounds of agreement.

From behind Slytherin’s goal post, Narcissa was in hot pursuit of the snitch. The tiny golden ball was making a beeline for the middle post, right where Malfoy was hovering. Lost in concentration, Narcissa didn’t realize how close she’d gotten. The Slytherin seeker was moving just about as fast as she could, but for everyone else it felt like watching the event unfold in slow motion. The snitch, making no indication of changing its current path, sailed through the post just above Malfoy’s head. He’d hardly noticed the ball, but he did notice Narcissa flying into him. Both of their brooms jerked forward. The momentum of Narcissa’s flying kept them moving for quite a few meters before they began to fall. 

Quick on their brooms and prepared for the worst, they were both able to straighten themselves out before reaching the ground. There was an audible sigh of relief from the Slytherin stands. Then there was cheering. Deafening cheering from all around Regulus. In all that commotion, Narcissa had reached for the snitch and clung to it with all her might. Regulus had seen her strain her arm further out, but had missed the precise moment the snitch had been captured. But as Narcissa flew over the stands, snitch in hand, face flushed, and wearing a smile bigger than Regulus had ever seen, there was no mistaking. Narcissa Black had caught the golden snitch. Slytherin had won the Quidditch Cup.

Chapter Text

June 15, 1973

While most everyone else was eager to get home for the Summer holiday, the majority of Slytherins would have much rather stayed at Hogwarts. Of course, none of them would admit that. They were too proud. Some were going home to loving parents, like Evan and the Greengrasses and the Slughorns, among others. Most were returning to a life of control, misery, and loneliness. At least Regulus found company in his misery with Pandora and Robin. The girls did nothing but express their adamant disapproval of returning home. Though the three of them did not speak about what exactly they were returning to, they all knew it. 

While the boys packed, Robin and Pandora found themselves seated at the center of discarded robes, books, parchment, and other various objects. Somehow they had managed to create more of a mess in an attempt to clean. Of course, Pandora and Robin being the responsible and organized witches they were, had packed the day before. Against their better judgment, they had agreed to be present and helpful for when the boys finally took care of business. 

“What if we just hid somewhere? They can’t send us back if they can’t find us.”

Pandora, holding her nose, lifted a pair of unwashed socks from the pile she found herself seated in.

“I don’t think it’s that easy, Dora.”

Robin was lying on her back, reading through the many books that had been tossed about and determining what belonged to who.

“I wish I had an invisibility cloak, I’d just hide on the train until everyone left.”

“Oh, yes, I’m sure that would work.”

“I’d hide out all evening and under the cover of night, I’d sneak into muggle London and live among them until it’s time to come back.”

Regulus wrinkled his nose at this, but as he was rummaging under his bed, nobody saw his face.

“If you wait until night, the platform barrier would be stuck. You’d be there for ages ,” Robin placed a book in the pile to her right.

“Actually, the train would just bring you back to Hogsmeade, then you’d really have some explaining to do,” Barty chimed in- he had done his packing the day prior and was watching the rest of them struggle for his own amusement. 

Regulus emerged from beneath his bed, covered in dust, and lacking greatly in the amusement Crouch had an abundance of. Even after a year of living together, going to classes together, and spending partially every moment at each other’s side, Regulus knew frighteningly little about his friend. Barty Crouch jr. came from a wealthy sacred twenty-eight family; his father worked for the Ministry and his mother stayed home. If he had any siblings, he never mentioned them. He never spoke about home- ever. The other children had at least been to one another’s homes. They never had to talk about their home lives because they saw it. Evan was the only one who was happy to go home for the Summer, as his family had plans to visit family in France. 

“If I were to end up back in Hogsmeade, that’d be a dream come true!” Pandora announced as she rose to her feet, “I’d be a barmaid for Madam Rosmerta, cleaning up the place and running her errands in exchange for free lodging. It would be a glorious Summer filled with nothing but work and play and I’d be able to go out to the lake and read to the squid whenever I liked.”

“ Read to the squid ?”

“ Barmaid ?”

Barty and Robin gave each other a questioning look.

Regulus just shook his head. Pandora’s rampant imagination wouldn’t save her from her fate. There was no use pretending that it could. 

“I think she’s onto something,” Evan added, “I think staying here for the Summer would be loads of fun. Too bad I’ll be in France the entire holiday, I-”

“ We know, Evan ,” the others said in unison.

“Oi! Keep me out of your pity party, yeah? It’s not my fault I’m going away.”

“Oh shut it, Rose,” Pandora launched the pair of dirty socks she’d found right at his face.

“Thanks, I was looking for these!”

They all continued to sort and pack in silence. Regulus noticed Barty keeping an unusual eye on Robin as she sifted through the piles. An unfamiliar knot grew in his stomach and his cheeks burned. Barty was leaning over the side of his desk chair, his chin in his palm, and his eyes hardly blinking. Perhaps he was just lost in thought, but Regulus couldn’t help the infiltrating voice in the back of his mind telling him Crouch was up to no good.

“Crouch, what are you up to this Summer?”

The question startled Barty out of his stare. All attention was turned towards him. Barty, like Regulus, did not like being in the spotlight. The boy shifted uneasily in his chair.

“Nothing. Boring stuff, really.”

“No family holiday, then?” Regulus was trying his hardest to sound casual, but his words came out a bit too demanding.

Barty narrowed his gaze.

“Well, see, my sister is graduating from Hogwarts this year and she opted to stay with us for the holiday before she heads out to Transylvania. She’s studying dangerous creatures there come autumn.”

“ Sister ?”

Everyone stared at Barty with wide and curious eyes. There was not a single other Crouch in Hogwarts, Regulus was sure of it.

“Half-sister,” Barty clarified, “mum’s daughter from a previous marriage. Lorraine and I don’t exactly get along as you can imagine.”

“Lorraine Travers! As in Head Girl Lorraine Travers ?” Pandora’s hair burst into a frenzy of colors as the information set in. 

Barty grimaced, “that’s the one.”

“But she’s- she’s just-” Robin struggled to find the words.

“She’s a nightmare,” Barty protested.

“She’s an inspiration!” Pandora squealed.

Every witch at Hogwarts loved Lorraine Travers. She was kind and gentle and beautiful, as well as brilliant. Not to mention she was Hufflepuff’s quidditch captain. Lorraine was the top in her class in almost every subject, but excelled best in Care of Magical Creatures and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Regulus only knew this because she had won awards in both subjects and her plaques were hanging in the third floor corridor. Not once all year had Regulus even seen Barty speak to his supposed half-sister, yet he let the secret slip on the very last day of the year? Regulus wasn’t buying it.

“How do we know you’re telling the truth?” 

“Why would I lie about that, Black?” Barty’s face was deeply red.

“You’ve never mentioned her before.”

“Because it’s embarrassing! She can’t stand me anyway and it’s not like we really grew up together. She hates my father and has a much more enjoyable life passing as a Travers.”

“So Iason Travers is also her brother?” Robin interjected. 

Barty groaned, “unfortunately so. Though she couldn’t be more different than either of us.”

Iason Travers, a third year Slytherin, was a quiet and reserved boy. He and Prometheus were often never seen one without the other, which meant he spent much of his time with Snape, Mulciber, and Avery as well. Iason was not involved in any extracurriculars and was hardly ever seen at Quidditch matches though his best friend was a starting chaser. Regulus had no opinion of the boy, as he had never spoken to him before. Though suddenly, Regulus’ interest was starting to take a turn.

“Mother pleaded with her to stay with us before going away, as she hardly sees her anyway,” Barty turned his gaze to the floor, “she bloody gave birth to her, and yet Lorraine can’t seem to be the slightest bit appreciative.”

It was the most Barty had ever spoken about his family before. Regulus ought to have felt bad about prying the information out of his friend, but he didn’t. Instead, he felt proud of himself for making such a discovery. The newfound insight on Barty’s personal life felt like some kind of leverage for Regulus. He concealed his smirk by turning away from the others and pretended to sort through his trunk. 

“I’d love to have a sister,” Pandora mused, “Prometheus is so boring. All he cares about is quidditch.”

Barty and Evan shared a knowing look at the mention of Prometheus, but they kept their lips sealed. What on Earth is that about? Regulus made a mental note to ask about that later. The girls didn’t seem to have noticed the wordless exchange.

“I couldn’t agree more. Though I’d happily trade Michael for Prometheus if you’d like,” Robin added.

“No offense, Robin, but I think I’ll pass.”

Robin let out a deep sigh as she piled up more books, “can’t say I blame you.”

During the final week of classes, Michael and Avery had gotten into the habit of setting invisible trip wires in the long gallery, subjecting many unsuspecting students to the hospital wing for bruises, cuts, and the occasional sprained wrist. Their joy for hurting others was becoming rather worrisome. Even Snape had distanced himself from the two, though he continued to find himself brawling with Sirius and Potter almost daily. From what Regulus had witnessed, all of those boys had multiple detentions to make up in the following term. It was like they were trying to set a record.

“What about you, Evan? Any siblings at home?” Robin asked more so out of feeling obligated to include the boy in the conversation and carry it away from Barty.

Rosier shook his head lightly, “nah, though mum let it slip once about how dad used to have a daughter. She died before I was born though, I think she was ill. They never talk about it. I link being an only child though and I got loads of cousins. I can’t imagine you lot have never looked at a family tree before, so you must know even we’re all related in some way or another.”

There was truth to Evan’s claim. All pure-blood families were connected, even those not in the sacred twenty-eight. Aunt Druella was actually Evan’s second cousin, sharing the name Rosier. From what Regulus could recall, his great-grandfather Cygus’ sister had married Herbert Burke, whom Regulus was fairly certain was Pandora’s great-grandparents. If he thought about it too much he was sure to give himself a headache and he did not want to find how he was related to Robin, for he was sure there was some connection. Each of the five children’s faces indicated that they were all thinking of their own lineage and connecting the dots. Simultaneously, they all grimaced and had trouble making eye contact with one another.

“Lucius told me yesterday that all of our families will be invited to Malfoy Manor at the beginning of July,” Barty said, changing the subject, “my father has objected to the invitation, but I’m rather interested in going. Would any of you be willing to have me as their guest that weekend?”

“Oh! I think we’ll be coming round for that actually,” Evan perked up, “but we’ll be headed right back to Versailles afterwards, sorry mate.”

“S’alight,” Barty shrugged.

Before Regulus could offer lodging, Robin extended an invitation.

“You can stay with me, Barty. I’m sure father won’t mind and Michael would be pleased to have you around.”

Again, Regulus’ stomach contorted unexpectedly.

“I’d offer you to stay with us, but I wouldn’t wish that upon my worst enemy,” Pandora laughed nervously.

Then without warning, she screamed and papers went flying into the air. Regulus’ heart nearly leapt from his chest at the horrific sounds coming from his best friend.

“There’s a bee! A bee!”

Sure enough a fat little bee was buzzing around Pandora’s head. She swatted at the insect to no avail. As quickly as the commotion arose, it faded away and the bee buzzed itself out of the room.

“Bloody hell, Dora! You trying to give us all heart attacks?” Evan dramatically clutched his chest.

“How do you think I feel?” Pandora gasped.

“How does a bee even get down here? The dungeons aren’t exactly prime real estate for pollinating,” Robin pushed up her glasses.

“Doesn’t matter now, seems like it’s gone,” Barty noted.

“Anyway,” Robin circled back to the topic at hand, “what exactly are the Malfoys hosting?”

“You haven’t heard!” Evan’s eyes grew wide.

The anger Regulus had towards Barty and Robin had suddenly faded away with Pandora’s outburst and he was now infuriated with the fact that he was once again left out of some extravagant plan. A plan that Barty and Evan had evidently kept from him. Not to mention Cissy- but he couldn’t ever be mad at her.

“The Malfoys are hosting the Dark Lord for some grand feast. Lucius told me that it’s very important for all of us to be there,” Crouch explained, “which is why I’m so very angry with father for not accepting the gracious invitation. He’s so headstrong in all the wrong ways.”

“We all have to go?” Pandora asked.

“Well I suppose it’s not exactly mandatory, but I wouldn’t want to get on Voldemort’s bad side. I’m sure your mother wouldn’t make you go if you asked sweetly enough.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Pandora’s hair suddenly became quite stormy.

Barty remained casual, almost unaware of Pandora’s emotions, “it’s no secret your mother has been staying close to the Weasleys. There’s been rumors going around about your mum being a blood traitor. It’s lucky you’re a Burke, Pandora.”

“That’s enough, Crouch!” Regulus broke his silence.

With very little emotion, Barty turned to Regulus, “I could say the same about you, Black. Your brother has stirred up quite a lot of trouble for your family. It’s lucky for you, he and Robin have been arranged. It keeps your name out of other people’s mouths.”

“Over my dead body will I be marrying Sirius Black,” Robin spoke with such certainty, it was actually a bit frightening. 

“I hope for your sake that’s true. There is nothing on Earth Sirius Black could do to make people think he wasn’t a traitor. He’d have to pull off something quite remarkable and unfortunately marrying a half-blood just proves the opposite.”

Robin was on her feet now, “you have no right to speak like that, Crouch! You know as well as anyone else here that I am more of a witch than most pure-bloods. My lineage doesn’t make a difference when it comes to my powers.”

“That might be so, but it doesn’t change the fact that your mother came from a mudblood .”

That word had been uttered so many times in that room. Almost daily, it was said at meal times, while studying, and doing whatever else. Nobody had ever batted an eye at its use before. That’s because none of them had used it towards one of their own before. Robin and Michael, like Snape, had always had their blood status overlooked for the sake of keeping the peace. That and Michael would likely curse anyone who said otherwise. It was mind boggling that just one drop of non-magical blood, from two generations back, could be used against Robin in such a fashion. Robin was Barty’s friend, yet he had no qualms with using a slur against her. His words were so casual, so nonchalant. It made Regulus’ blood boil. 

“ Depulso! ” Regulus casted the spell at Barty without even thinking.

The boy flew out of his chair and into the opposite wall. The sound of his head hitting the wall was something Regulus would never be able to unhear. Barty groaned as he crumbled to the floor. He didn’t get up or even stir. This frightened Regulus so much he immediately felt nauseous. 

“Black, what did you do!” Evan yelled as he ran to Barty’s side, tripping over loose articles of clothing as he did so.

“I- he shouldn’t have said those things,” Regulus struggled to get the words out.

Robin turned on Regulus, “as if you’re any better!”

“I’d never-”

“ Don’t . You haven’t but that doesn't mean you won’t.” 

It was like being punched in the gut. The wind was practically knocked out of him.

“Regulus, you shouldn’t have done that,” Pandora had tears in her eyes, “Robin can stand up for herself.”

“He was having a go at you, too,” Regulus argued, “I promised I’d always stand up for you.”

“Not like this, Reggie.”

Regulus didn’t understand, couldn’t understand. He was doing just what he ought to have. Barty’s words were uncalled for, undignified even. How could he call himself their friend, yet say such things and mean them? Regulus would never. Right? I would never … But the realization of what Regulus had done to Barty, done to his friend, proved that he already had. Regulus meant to hurt Barty, it didn’t matter that they were friends. In turn he hurt Robin and Pandora, too. But I was protecting them. It didn’t make sense.

“He needs to go to Pomfrey. I think he’s knocked out,” Evan choked on his words.

***

Regulus was suddenly at a desk sitting across from not only Professor Slughorn, but Dumbledore as well. For the first time in quite a while, Regulus had separated his mind from the world around him. Barty . Oh Merlin, how long has it been? Panic began to set in as Regulus recalled his actions. What scared him more than anything was that he felt zero remorse for what he had done, he was only concerned with maintaining his enrollment at Hogwarts. They’re going to expel me for sure. The thought made him frantic and sweaty.

“Mr. Black, I’ll ask you just once more, can you please enlighten us on what happened? From your perspective, of course,” Dumbledore sat back in his chair.

Regulus gulped, “I used depulso on Barty Crouch jr., sir.”

“Yes, my boy, but why ?” Slughorn’s brows were knit, concern and confusion plastered on his wrinkled face.

“He referred to Robin’s grandmother as a mudblood, sir. He was instigating an argument with both Robin and Pandora. I defended them.”

There was no warmth in Dumbledore’s tone, “you knocked the poor boy unconscious, Mr. Black.”

“Though I understand my methods were not the wisest, I was defending my friends,” Regulus insisted.

“Mr. Black this is the second time you’ve attacked a student this year in defense of another,” Dumbledore pointed out, “I’ve also heard you set your dormitory on fire at the beginning of the term, is that correct?”

Regulus’ face fell, “that was an accident! Nobody got hurt and Lucius set everything right.”

“That may be so, but it should have never happened in the first place,” Dumbledore stroked his long white beard, as if stuck in some deep thought. 

The temper in Regulus was rising, but he held his tongue. Slughorn and Dumbledore just patiently waited for what the young Black had to say in his own defense. The way they looked down upon him was infuriating, insulting even. They just don’t understand.

Regulus took a deep breath and closed his eyes, when he opened them he was calm and unbothered. All his anger tucked neatly away.

“Is Barty going to be okay?”

“Yes, he’s completely fine!” Slughorn exhaled a nervous laugh, “just hit his head the wrong way.”

Regulus sighed in relief. Maybe I won’t get expelled after all.

“Mr. Crouch’s recovery does not exclude your actions, Regulus-”

“Now, now, Albus,” Slughorn interrupted, “young Black seems to have acted in defense of two young ladies. If what he’s said is true, which I very much believe it is, then I don’t think his punishment should be so harsh.”

Dumbledore’s eye twitched slightly behind his half moon spectacles. The action caused the corners of Regulus’ lips to turn up just slightly. He fought to keep his smile at bay.

“Mr. Black, you will receive two weeks worth of detention upon your return in September. Now, you may be excused,” Dumbledore stood hastily from his chair.

Regulus murmured a “thank you” before quickly exiting the headmaster’s office. As he came down the spiral stairs, Regulus was greeted with the most unexpected and painful punch in the face he’d ever received. He’d been struck just below his left eye, blood immediately flowed from the cut on his cheekbone. 

“What the hell?” He brought his hands up to his face. 

Robin, clutching her already bruising hand, glared down at Regulus. There was a fire in her eyes Regulus had only ever seen before in his mother. There was something about the way the June afternoon sunlight streamed in from the end of the corridor and encapsulated Robin’s silhouette. She was practically glowing. Regulus’ skin began to tingle and his stomach flipped. The pain in his face had completely gone. All he could feel was the pain in his chest as he stared at the witch before him. 

“I wanted to show you that I can stand up for myself, thanks.”

Regulus was entirely speechless. 

“What you did was horrid and I forbid you from ever defending me ever again. Do you understand?”

Regulus nodded his head eagerly.

Robin’s expression softened at Regulus’ willingness to comply.

“Come on, Black, let’s get you cleaned up.”

Silently, they returned to the dungeons. Regulus suspected Robin didn’t want Pomfrey asking any questions as to how Regulus got injured. He would have lied of course, but there was no reason to risk more punishments. Regulus followed Robin into his own bathroom off his dorm room and sat on the edge of the tub as she rummaged through a crate of bandages and potions. Regulus winced as Robin began to apply some unfamiliar ointment to his open wound. The tips of her fingers brushed his face so gently, that if it weren’t for the sting of his cut, he might not have felt her touch at all. The heat of the cut quickly changed to a cool soothing sensation as the magical ointment did its trick. 

“The cut will be gone, but I expect you’ll have that bruise for quite awhile,” Robin tried unsuccessfully to hide the pride in her voice.

“You have a strong punch.”

Robin sighed, “yeah, well you have to when you have an even stronger brother.”

“Right.”

Regulus and Sirius had their fair share of squabbles in the past, but more often than not it was Regulus who came out on top. Sirius was incapable of physically hurting Regulus; it just wasn’t in his nature. For Robin to admit Michael’s cruelty towards her, hurt Regulus more deeply than it should have. He couldn’t relate at all and he had no sympathetic words to offer, but he couldn’t help but feel overwhelmingly protective of the witch in front of him. Robin didn’t deserve to hurt.

As the dormitory door opened, they both turned their heads in the direction of voices. Specifically, Barty and Evan’s voices.

“Suppose I should apologize.”

“Yes, you should,” Robin blocked Regulus from exiting the bathroom, “Black, you cannot do that ever again. Not for me or Pandora or anyone else. It’s one thing to get detention or to even get expelled, but you’ll put a target on your back for how powerful your anger can be.”

“I already agreed not to defend you again,” Regulus retorted rather bitterly.

“That’s not what I mean. We, all of us , have to stick together. We can’t be attacking one another. I don’t want to see you put yourself in harm's way.”

“Fine,” Regulus shuffled past and exited the bathroom.

Barty was seated at the edge of his bed, looking fine but more exhausted than Regulus had ever seen him before. The dark circles under his eyes reminded Regulus much of his own.

“I’m sorry for attacking you. I’ll never do it again and I hope you accept my apology,” Regulus forced the words out and offered his hand. 

Barty shook with a smirk on his face and an unsuspecting spark in his eyes. Could it have been mischief or pride or even awe? Regulus wasn’t sure.

“Had that been a proper duel, I would have put you on your arse,” Barty noted, “but I’ll admit, I’m impressed. Didn’t know you had it in you, Black.”

Then they carried on as boys will do. They finished their packing, attended the final feast of the year, and laughed and chatted away like any other evening. Slytherin was proud to have won the House Cup for the first time in ages. Regulus was quite relieved that his actions hadn’t resulted in any lost points. For the second year running, Gryffindor had come in dead last thanks to the Prewetts and Sirius and his friends. Regulus just didn’t understand how they could never take anything seriously. Those Gryffindors never felt shame or humiliation and they were hardly ambitious. If they tried half as hard in school as they did in pulling off pranks and getting into trouble, they’d be running circles around the other houses. Losing was like a badge of honor from them. 

But what did Regulus care? Slytherin had won the Quidditch Cup and the House Cup, he’d gotten the second highest marks in all his classes after Barty, and he’d made it through an entire year almost completely unscathed. Regulus considered that all to be quite impressive for a first year student. Before the school year was completely over, he was already setting goals for his second year. The first and most important being to make Slytherin’s quidditch team.

Chapter Text

June 16, 1973

The ride back to London was a somber one. In one compartment sat Sirius, James, Peter, Remus, Lily, and another girl whom Regulus learned to be Mary Macdonald. In the next compartment sat Regulus, Evan, Barty, Robin, and Pandora. The eight hour journey had Regulus bouncing back and forth between the two. He wanted to spend as much time with his friends as possible, but there was something that drew him into Sirius’ crowd. At school, they were the most obnoxious bunch Regulus had ever seen, but without an audience they were quite fun to be around. 

“So, have you and Sirius spoken at all about the erm… arrangement?”

“Nope,” Robin flicked the pages of Witch Weekly. 

“You don’t seem concerned.”

“I’m not.”

“Robin, is there something I’m missing here?”

She threw her hair over her shoulder, “no, Black. I assure you that there is nothing to worry about. Why don’t you speak to him yourself?”

“That’s not a bad idea.”

Regulus immediately transferred to the next compartment. Hardly anyone looked at him as he entered and took a seat next to his brother.

“Sirius.”

“Regulus,” Sirius smirked.

“What’s going on with this Robin arrangement? She won’t tell me a thing but I know she’s got a plan. Tell me what it is won’t you?”

Sirius laughed, “we’re just going to live our lives as we like. She’s a seer and if she’s not worried, then I’m not worried. You can’t really believe Walburga would have me marry a half-blood would you?”

Lily and Mary both shot him warning looks.

“Not that I care, but Walburga does. Which is why this whole thing doesn’t make any sense and she’d never follow through. Besides, I’m dating Mary now.”

The girl was beaming at the mention of her name.

“What happened to Selena?” 

“She’s a nutter, that’s what happened. Stay away from that psychopath, Reg.”

“Right…”

Regulus eyed Mary carefully. Her skin was silky brown and her hair floated above her shoulders in soft curls. There was a small dimple in her right cheek and she held her posture perfectly. For one, she was much prettier than Selena, that much was true. This new development didn’t bother Regulus and he refused to admit to himself that it was because he wasn’t jealous this time around. 

A sudden shift to Regulus’ left caused his attention to be drawn elsewhere. Remus’ nose was practically touching the book he was buried in. His eyes weren’t scanning the page, though, Regulus could tell. There was something strange about Lupin's demeanor that Regulus had only noticed a few times before. His eyes were dark and sunken and his skin was paler than usual. To Regulus, he looked positively ill. The older boy’s cheeks were flushed and his eyebrows knit as he tried to focus on anything but the conversation at hand. Maybe Regulus couldn’t recognize jealousy in himself but he definitely could in others. Remus Lupin has a crush on Mary Macdonald. Regulus had to hold back his laughter as he sprung from his seat and returned to the other compartment.

“What the hell are you all giggly about?” Barty asked.

“Sirius has a new girlfriend,” it wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either. Regulus would keep Remus’ secret. 

“I feel sorry for the poor sap who falls victim to Slughorn next,” Robin said coolly with a snort. 

Pandora’s eyes were wide with curiosity, “who is it, Reg?” 

“Mary Macdonald.”

The other four sharply turned their attention towards him.

“What?”

Pandora twisted her hair nervously as it changed to green, “she’s muggleborn.”

Regulus’ face fell, “oh.”

Not that he cared what Sirius did with his free time or who he chose to associate with, but Walburga most definitely would. If she were to find out… Well, Regulus didn’t want to think about that. Faking an arrangement with Robin was one thing, Sirius actually dating a mudblood was entirely different. Knowing Sirius, half of Hogwarts were sure to know already. Though, if that were the case, how come Regulus didn’t already know? Confused, he marched back over to Sirius.

“When did this happen?”

“Yesterday.”

“How’d you break it off with Selena?”

“We haven’t talked in weeks.”

Regulus stared blankly at his brother, “so she doesn’t know?”

“Suppose not,” Sirius shrugged.

Regulus smacked his brother on the ear.

“What the hell, Reg!”

“You didn’t break up with Selena you twat! Merlin, you’re stupid. You can’t just start dating other girls willy nilly.”

“I’m not! I was with Selena and now I’m with Mary.”

“Sirius, you really should tell Selena,” Mary urged.

“See!” Regulus turned to Mary, “thank you.”

Sirius groaned, “fine! I’ll do it right now.”

The older Black threw open the sliding compartment door and marched down the corridor. A moment passed before everyone inside the compartment realized what was about to happen and eagerly began to follow. Regulus stopped by his compartment on the way down.

Poking his head in, grinning ear to ear, he said, “you’re going to want to see this.”

With that, an unlikely group of Gryffindors and Slytherins were bounding down the corridor giggling nervously and whispering over their shoulders. Sirius ignored them all as he trucked along ahead of them, determined to end the whole silly expedition. 

They finally came to the Slytherin’s unofficial official car and with a deep breath, Sirius marched right on in and straight up to Selena Slughorn. Across from her in the tiny booth were the only other Slytherin girls who gave her the time of day, Lucinda Talkalot and her own sister, Serenity. Narcissa, Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle, and Snyde were sitting in the booth opposite the girls and had quickly ended their conversation to watch whatever was about to go down. Regulus even heard Narcissa whisper to them all, “this is going to be the best worst thing you’ll ever see.” With that, Regulus felt an overwhelming rush of artificial jealousy and anxiety. Narcissa was influencing the situation; Regulus had to bit his lip to keep from laughing at the absurdity of it all.

“Selena, we need to break up,” Sirius stated very matter-of-factly. 

The witch’s eyes narrowed in on Robin and she snapped her chewing gum violently, “I knew you’d cause trouble.”

“Robin has nothing to do with this,” Sirius rolled his eyes, “Selena, I’ll be honest with you. You’re insane.”

Narcissa and Astrid made no attempt to muffle their snorts.

“Sirius Black, you are the most self-absorbed, arrogant, idiotic, boy I’ve ever met-”

“But you still snogged him daily!” James announced. 

Regulus bit his knuckles.

“Selena, I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that many of the faults you find in me are just the same as the ones you deny yourself of having,” Sirius stated all the while flashing his notorious grin, “your jealousy and your inexplicable ability to jump to conclusions is precisely the reason I’m breaking up with you.”

What everyone had failed to notice was the tea tray set out on the table in front of Selena. Before anyone could stop her, she lifted the steaming kettle and dumped its contents right over Sirius’ head. Nobody was laughing anymore. The scream Sirius emitted was much like the ones Regulus would hear back at Grimmauld Place. The scalding hot water burned the boy’s scalp and much of his face, leaving him instantly red and blistery. 

Narcissa was on her feet, “everyone out! Now! ”

Out they went and very frantically, too. 

“Oi, Selena!”

Regulus knew what was about to happen, but he was at the back of the group in the very narrow corridor. There was no way he, nor anyone else, could’ve stopped Robin in what she was in the process of already doing. Just like the evening prior, Robin’s fist collided with the left cheekbone in front of her. Merlin, she doesn’t hold back . There was collective shouting from those around them, mixed in with hysterical laughter from Evan and Barty. The Gryffindor’s were shocked into silence by the tiny Slytherin’s strength. Nobody except Regulus could have seen it coming. 

“What the fuck! What is wrong with you?” Selena stared at the blood in her hands.

“I should be asking you the same thing. You poured hot water all over him!”

Selena had no response to that. She and the older Slytherins took off without another word, while everyone else stared at Robin, jaws slack. When she turned to face them all, she was surprisingly calm. There was zero indication of what had previously transpired. 

“What?”

“That was brilliant!” James shouted, while a very distressed Peter hid behind him.

“Can you teach us to hit like that?” Lily asked.

“Us girls could use a bit of a physical advantage,” Mary added.

“Sure, I guess,” Robin wasn’t used to so much attention.

Regulus shuffled through the cluster of bodies until he reached Robin, “is he okay, can you see him?”

Robin nodded, “yeah, Narcissa is fixing him up now. He’s okay. If I had been closer to Selena, I could have stopped her. I saw it happen,” Robin was suddenly extremely distressed as the memory flashed behind her eyes. 

“It’s fine, yeah? You really gave it to her, Robin,” Regulus couldn’t help the bit of pride and admiration building inside of him.

“Mulciber, you have got to be just about the coolest girl I’ve ever met,” James’ eyes were practically glowing, “any girl who can hit like that, is alright in my book.”

From the corner of his eye, Regulus noticed Lily turn slightly red before turning to face Mary. Before he could really process that, Crouch was moving up the corridor.

“Don’t get on her bad side, Potter, she gave Reggie here the same treatment last night,” Barty smirked.

“She hit you ?” James’ expression turned from awe to absolute terror.

Regulus turned to show off the yellowing bruise under his eye, “she cleaned me up though, no longer have the cut she left.”

“Are you okay?” James was suddenly very worried about Regulus’ wellbeing.

“He’s fine , Potter,” Robin snapped. 

Regulus heard Evan and Barty muffle their laughter behind him. 

“Let’s go,” Robin said to no one in particular, but the four Slytherins followed her wordlessly.

Back in their compartment, Regulus found Pandora had been oddly quiet during the whole interaction. She didn’t look at any of them as Barty and Evan continued to laugh and act out Robin’s actions. If he was being honest, Regulus had completely forgotten Pandora had been with them all that time. 

“You alright, Dora?”

Regulus could tell she was about to say yes, but stopped herself short at the realization of the lie. Instead, she said nothing at all and turned to face the window. Before Regulus could say anything more, there was a light knock at the door. Sirius came in with his head bowed slightly, his long hair covering his eyes. To Regulus’ relief he didn’t look injured at all.

Sirius cleared his throat before speaking to Robin directly, “the others told me what you did. Mulciber, it was very cool of you to stand up for me like that.”

Robin blushed slightly, “no need to thank me, I’d do it for anyone-”

“But you can’t do that ever again.”

Regulus sat back in his seat rather smugly as he watched Robin’s lips tighten into a thin line. By Robin standing up to Selena, she had done exactly what Regulus had in standing up to Crouch. If Regulus knew anything, it was that Sirius didn’t need saving. Robin going after Selena like that, while it seemed heroic in the moment, would result in others making fun of Sirius for the foreseeable future. Not to mention their arrangement would suggest that Robin’s actions came from a place of jealousy or even true affection. Regulus didn’t even want to think about how negatively Walburga would react upon hearing the news- and she would hear about it.

Sirius continued, “I appreciate it, I do, but you’re just going to get yourself into trouble. I don’t want that on my conscience.”

Not the direction I thought this was going to go.

Robin tilted her chin up, “perhaps I didn’t do it for you, Black. Maybe Slughorn had it coming.”

At that, Sirius was back to his upbeat self with a crooked smile stretching ear to ear. He nodded at Sirius and Robin and backed out of the compartment with a new bounce in his step. Once the door had shut, Robin sunk low in her seat, an audible groan forming in the back of her throat. Barty and Evan sat across from them, both smiling at Robin’s blatant hypocrisy. 

“Don’t. Say. A word,” Robin spoke through her teeth.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Regulus mumbled as Barty and Evan continued to laugh. 

Their compartment remained silent for the next fifteen minutes or so as each of the Slytherins returned to reading, napping, or whatever it was before the Sirius incident. Regulus was about to go back to Sirius’ compartment, but he couldn’t help but notice the tangible tension coming from Pandora’s direction. Still facing the window, her body was stone still and her fists clenched. What in the world is wrong with her? Before he could say anything, Pandora’s hair turned a violent shade of red and she whipped around to face her friends with a fury in her eyes Regulus had never seen in her before.

“Why do you all resort to violence? Why is it whenever there is the slightest problem you lash out?”

She tried to keep her eyes fixed on all four of them, but Regulus knew her words were directed towards Robin and himself. He was at a loss of words.

Robin shifted uneasily beside him, “Pandora, I-”

“No! I’m not done. All of you, my brother, Selena, Sirius and his-his marauders. Everyone turns to violence to get what they want and I’m sick of seeing it. I’m sick of being around it. We are all going home to something awful- Evan, if you say one thing about France I’m going to lose it! Don’t tell me I’m wrong, because I know you feel it, too. Whatever is out there, it’s coming for us. It already has come for us and we’re just- just waiting like helpless lamb. So, instead of beating each other up and throwing curses around like it’s nothing, we should be sticking together!”

Regulus suddenly felt very small with Pandora standing over him, her face hot with anger. None of the others said a word as they all stared at their friend with wide and worried eyes. The thing was, Pandora was absolutely right. Regulus had felt it for a while now, something was coming. Or it had already arrived and they were all blind to it. Either way, whatever laid ahead wasn’t going to be pretty. 

“I’m going to talk to Sirius,” Regulus got up and left, keeping his eyes downcast. 

The next compartment over was full of laughter and high pitched conversations. Entering their compartment was like entering another world. So happy and blissful. What must that be like ? Regulus sighed at the thought of his own friends and the hurt they all felt. Even if Sirius’ friends were trouble makers, they must have been doing something right. Whatever it was, Regulus wished to be a part of it. At the same time, he didn’t think he deserved it. 

“Sirius, can we talk?”

The way Regulus asked this, in a low hushed tone, caught the attention of both Potter and Lupin. Sirius looked his friends back to his brother, with an eyebrow raised. Of course Sirius would tell them everything anyway, so Regulus decided he might as well tell them all together.

“Yes, they can come,” Regulus rolled his eyes, “come on, the opposite compartment is empty.”

“So, what’s up, Reg?” Sirius scratched the back of his head as he leaned up against the compartment window, “Mulciber pissed at me?”

“Er, no. Pandora, actually.”

“ What? What did I do to her?”

“Nothing exactly,” Regulus sat across from a very nervous James and Remus, “she kind of went mental on all of us.”

The three boys sat in silence as they waited for Regulus to continue. 

“I don’t know what exactly got into her, she was fine and then she just snapped. She’s upset with how we all resort to violence? But more than that, she thinks something really bad is going on and we should be trying to help each other rather than hurt each other.”

“I completely agree,” Lupin had his eyes fixed on Regulus and spoke with such certainty, it was actually a bit surprising. 

Regulus nodded at his brother’s friend, but as he did so, his eyes narrowed in on a shiny fresh scar going up Lupin’s forearm. It was thick and jagged and looked awfully painful. Regulus wondered how he missed that. What would even have to happen to result in an injury like that? Regulus wondered as he thought about all the minor injuries Hogwarts students endured and how word got around like fiendfyre when someone ended up in the hospital wing. Surely, Regulus would have heard about something happening to one of Sirius’ best friends. Remus caught Regulus’ stare and attempted to pull the sleeve of his shirt down to no avail. 

“What’s that got to do with us?” Sirius sounded a bit impatient. 

“Well, she mentioned you directly in her little speech,” Regulus laughed to himself, “she called you lot marauders . I don’t even think she knows what that means, it’s not like you go around stealing things.”

“Marauders?” James’ eyes lit up, “I like it!”

Regulus rolled his eyes at the absurdity, “anyway, I wanted to know what you think about that. Especially coming from Pandora. She’s usually so happy and bubbly. I’d expect it from Robin, but this just seemed so out of character for her. I think something is really wrong if Pandora is all shaken up about it.”

“What exactly did she say?” Remus asked.

“She specifically mentioned all of you in the same breath as her brother and Selena, saying she was sick of seeing and being around so much violence, and then said that something horrible has already come for us. Honestly, it was a bit frightening.”

The three Gryffindors looked at each other with uncertainty. Sirius simply nodded to James, as if he was giving him permission to speak. Potter let out a defeated sigh and looked to Regulus with so much care and sadness.

“Regulus, what if this horrible thing that’s coming, that’s already here, is Lord Voldemort?”

Regulus snorted, but before he could say anything, James continued.

“I’ve heard my parents say that there’s more than just a political war going on right now at the Ministry. We’ve even seen in the Prophet, there’s been attacks all over muggle London. The ideals Voldemort preaches may have some influence over the dark magic that’s been spreading about over the past year.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

James bit his lip, “what I’m trying to say is maybe this is a real issue that we need to be aware of. I’ll be honest, I’ve felt the same way it seems Pandora has for a while now.”

Remus nodded along, while Sirius just watched Regulus with curious eyes. 

“What if the ‘bad things’ that are coming is the retaliation against Voldemort? He cares about protecting magical blood, about strengthening it. He takes pride in the wizarding world and only wants us to become the next generation of leaders. I agree attacks on muggles are horrible, but those are just the acts of extremists and deadly half-breeds. Only the most vile would succumb to that. Whatever is happening, it’s not Voldemort’s doing.”

With each word, Regulus felt less and less sure of himself which only prompted him to keep talking. By the end, he was no longer trying to convince James, he was trying only to convince himself. Regulus thought back to Narcissa’s warning on the train back from the winter holiday; he had to play by the rules. All over again, he felt the fear Narcissa had felt and heard her plea to try to bring Sirius and Pandora into the fold. Yet in that moment, Regulus feared he’d already lost them both and that he was beginning to lose himself. 

“Fine,” James clapped his hands on his knees and stood with such force Regulus leaned back into his seat, “just think about it, Regulus.”

As James exited the compartment, Remus turned to Regulus, “Pandora is right. Violence is not the answer, but we’re violent creatures. All humans are, whether their muggle, magical, or even half-breed. It’s in our nature. We try to fight it, but you can’t fight violence with violence. Trust me.”

Regulus expected some grand speech from Sirius, too. Instead, his brother followed Lupin right out of the compartment, giving Regulus a very defeated and longing look of dismay as he passed. That probably hurt more than anything. Regulus wanted Sirius to argue with him, to convince him he was wrong. That’s what brothers are supposed to do. They’re supposed to care enough to fight each other. But as that sliding glass door shut, leaving Regulus behind, he felt deep in his gut that Sirius had stopped caring.

Chapter Text

June 16, 1973

It hadn’t taken long for Regulus to wish he was back at Hogwarts. Orion had arrived at the platform with Kreacher in tow; an odd sight and one that neither Sirius nor Regulus had expected. The two groups of children had exited the train together, saying their goodbyes and exchanging pleasantries. When Regulus turned to face his father after shaking the hands of many Gryffindors, including both Lily and Mary, he was greeted with quite the opposite of parental affection. Normally, the Black family would simply walk to and from King’s Cross. Instead, Orion took both his boys but their collars and disapparated from the station with such force the boys almost left their trunks behind. Lucky for them, neither was splinched and perhaps had anticipated the quick getaway. 

With a deafening crack, they landed in their dimly lit kitchen where the faint smell of burnt biscuits hung in the air. Regulus had barely collected himself before he was knocked right off his feet and tumbling backwards over his trunk. Orion’s strong hand, which had never touched Regulus before, split the boy’s cheek wide open. Falling backwards was a bit more alarming than the searing pain in his face, but Regulus couldn’t panic long before his skull met the corner of the steel oven. 

After that, the first thing Regulus felt was a cold dampness across his forehead. The longer he let his thoughts linger on the sensation, the more quickly the dull pain in his head emerged. Regulus opened his eyes to find Kreacher leaning over him; the elf’s large eyes were just inches from his face. Instinctively, Regulus pushed his head back. That was a big mistake. Black spots appeared in his vision as he moved to clasp the spot where his neck met his skull. Kreacher grabbed his wrist before he could make contact with his injury.

“How dare you touch me like that!” Regulus pulled his arm from the elf’s grip, the pain in his head receding. 

Kreacher bowed his head, “Master must not touch. Master is greatly injured.”

Regulus let out a great sigh as he slumped into his pillows, “what happened?”

“Master Regulus hit his head on the oven. Mistress Black says you injured the part of your brain that controls your eyes.”

Regulus looked at the elf questioningly.

“Kreacher does not know what that means. Kreacher only shares what Mistress says.”

“Where is my mother?”

“Mistress is getting the doctor.”

“Where’s Sirius?”

“Outside,” Kreacher nodded to the closed door.

“Send him in.”

Kreacher hopped down from the bed and shuffled over to the door. Upon opening it, Sirius fumbled in, having been leaning on the door. His eyes were swollen from crying, but his tears had long since been dried up. Sirius sported a large bruise above his eye, something that had not been there previously.

“What happened to you?” Regulus sat up quickly, resulting in more spotty vision.

“Orion had a piece of me, too,” Sirius offered a crooked smile. 

“Did he explain why?”

Regulus was having a hard time processing his father’s actions. Orion, more often than not, stayed out of disciplining his children. The only known time he ever interfered was when he crucio’d Sirius. 

“ How dare you fraternize with mudbloods! How dare you even touch a mudblood! Disgraceful, horrid, children. An embarrassment to the wizarding world - embarrassments to all pure blood families! ” Sirius impersonated his father with scary accuracy. 

“All this ,” Regulus motioned towards himself, “for shaking hands?”

Sirius snorted, “so of course I responded with ‘she’s not a mudblood, she’s my girlfriend.’”

Regulus’ jaw dropped, “you didn’t. S, please tell me you didn’t.”

“Sure did,” Sirius flashed a grin, “earned myself an unforgivable for it, too, but it was worth it.”

“ Worth it ? Are you trying to get yourself killed? You’re lucky you’re not dead, Sirius.”

“I had to stand up for her!”

“Not to father, you didn’t! Mary wasn’t even here!”

“No, but now I get to tell her how valiantly I defended her.”

“Sirius, you’re so bloody stupid, it hurts.”

“That might just be your injuries.”

“I hate you.”

“Nah, you don’t,” Sirius waved his hand, and took a seat beside Regulus.

“How much does mother know?”

“Everything. She’s livid about the ‘atrocities’ we committed, but she was more concerned about getting you a doctor.”

“ Great. ”

Regulus didn’t even have time to think about what Walburga would do once he recovered, because at that very moment she came running through the door. She was the most disheveled Regulus had ever seen her; her curls fell in loose strands from her usually tight bun, her gray eyes were wide and wild, and the buttons up the front of her blouse were clasped in the wrong order. She had clearly left in quite a hurry. Behind her, a stout little man shuffled in with a large medical bag. 

“My perfect boy, you’re awake!” Walburga threw herself on top of Regulus, who winced at the sudden contact.

“Mum, it hurts,” Regulus grunted.

Walburga straightened up, “oh, yes, of course. Well, next time you’ll think twice about familiarizing yourself with mudbloods. I can’t agree with the punishment, though I can certainly agree that a punishment was in order.”

“Yes, mother,” as Regulus spoke, he caught Sirius rolling his eyes.

“Doctor Giatros is here to examine you. I fear you hit your head far too close to the occipital lobe.”

“The what ?”

“The occipital lobe is the part of the brain that connects to your eyes and allows you to interpret what you see. It’s really quite fascinating,” Giatros explained. 

“How did you know?” Regulus spoke directly to Walburga.

“During my final years at Hogwarts, I had been studying to become a healer. Though I never finished, I can still recall a thing or two,” Walburga stiffened as she spoke.

If Regulus hadn’t been in so much pain or deathly afraid of his mother, he might have laughed. The image of Walburga being anything remotely close to gentle (as a healer must be) was unbelievable. Given her background, she sure knew how to make pain hurt the most, perhaps that’s why she chose that field. 

“I am going to perform a few eye examinations,” Giatros said as he lit his wand.

Regulus then completed a variety of tasks looking into the light, reading off parchment, and recalling details from the past few hours. All things he accomplished successfully. 

“It seems the boy has only experienced some minor injuries and the spotting in his vision will clear up on its own with time. Nothing to worry about! Just reapply this ointment to the wound every two hours until tomorrow and it will heal up just fine.”

“Thank you, Doctor Giatros,” Walburga nodded.

“My pleasure,” the doctor bowed his bald head and shuffled back out of the room; the crack of his disapparation startled both Regulus and Sirius. 

“I cannot believe you boys,” Walburga pinched the bridge of her nose, “I work so incredibly hard to make sure our family doesn’t fall apart ,” her voice cracked as she spoke.

“You have no idea how difficult you make things for everybody. Everyday I bend over backwards to defend your actions, to make people take a positive interest in you. But both of you need to think about how your actions impact the people around you. How I ended up with two unbelievably selfish children, I will never understand.”

Walburga didn’t raise her voice or pull out her wand, nor did she even open her eyes as she spoke between raspy gasps for air. 

“I work so hard. So hard . And nobody cares! Nobody even thanks me! Neither of you have any idea how good you have it. I always put our family first and you two repay me with acting out in public like the blood traitors everyone says you are! Do you understand how bad that looks? How humiliating it is to hear that on the streets?”

Sirius and Regulus both stared at their mother with blank expressions. Never had they heard her speak like that before. So desperate and sad. Regulus’ heart broke for his mother. He had blatantly disrespected his mother and her instructions for him. He wanted to slap himself for being so foolish as to associate with Sirius’ friends. What was I thinking? Sure, it was okay for Sirius to act out, it was his nature to do so. But for Regulus, it was far out of character. He had to stop letting Sirius influence him. 

“I’m sorry, mother. I’ve learned my lesson, I promise.”

Walburga’s expression softened as she cast her gaze upon her perfect boy, “yes, I suppose you have. Be wiser when you return to Hogwarts, hm?”

Regulus nodded.

“How about you?” She turned her attention towards Sirius.

“What about me?”

“Have you learned your lesson?”

A moment passed and Sirius noticeably gulped, unsure of how to answer. Their mother only looked at him with her brows raised, waiting patiently for a response. Regulus silently prayed for his brother to answer with a simple ‘yes,’ but this was Sirius Black and things could not happen so easily with him. 

“I’m unsure of what lesson I was to have learned.”

“Not to associate with mudbloods ,” Walburga’s eye twitched slightly as she spoke through her teeth. 

“That’s interesting, really,” Sirius placed a hand on his chin as if he was in deep thought, “see, Robin is a half-blood and some may say she has dirty blood . Some may call her a mudblood , and I believe very recently they have. What’s so interesting about that is I’m supposed to marry her, per your arrangement, mother. So I’m just a little confused. Am I or am I not to associate with non purebloods?”

Walburga’s face hardened and her eyes went wide with alarm and fury. While Regulus wondered the same thing himself, he never would have vocalized those things to her. For Sirius to question her methods, was practically a death sentence. He truly never learned. While Walburga struggled to find her words, Sirius continued. 

“It’s an interesting thought, isn’t it? How far removed must someone be from their muggle lineage to be considered acceptable? Really, how different is Robin from any muggle born witch?”

“Get out,” Walburga growled quietly.

“What was that?”

“Get out ! Sirius Black you get out of this room right this instant before I force you out, myself. Get out ! Get out, now!” 

There was the tiniest glint of fear in Sirius’ eyes as he exited Regulus’ room. Walburga would certainly deal with him later, but for the moment he had been successful in ruffling Walburga’s feathers. Regulus knew well that his brother took the small victories where he could. Merlin, did he hate him for it, too.

***

June 30, 1973

Doctor Giatros had been right in stating that Regulus would be fine in a day’s time. Regulus had woken up the morning after their return home with no headache, clear vision, and a healed wound. The weeks which followed his injury were less than satisfactory. Walburga wasted no time returning to her old ways. As soon as Regulus was healed, she was adamant that he remained bedridden for at least another two days. In those two days, Regulus mourned his time at Hogwarts and longed to be back there. He wished his body were numb, unable to feel Walburga’s touch as she forced him to move under her hands. 

Regulus spent the better half of his first full week at home forcing himself to vomit in the upstairs bathroom. The first time he caught his reflection after Walburga had her way with him, he smashed the mirror straight through, bloodying his hand and spreading glass all over the bathroom. He didn’t even bother to clean it up; he just left it to be blamed on Sirius. An old sheet had been hung over the mirror in his bedroom, but even that did very little in shielding himself from the many reflective objects around 12 Grimmauld Place. 

There was one evening where Regulus had gotten too close to an open flame in the library. The hairs of his arm had briefly caught fire before going out on its own. During those few seconds, Regulus carefully watched the flames dance on his skin and welcomed the accompanying pain. A slight pink burn marked his skin and he surprised himself with how much he liked it. From then on he continued to “accidentally” run his fingers through candles and lean on the hot stove burners. It was similar to how he would sit outside in the cold of winter. Though the sting of brisk air was nothing in comparison to the thrill of fire burning through the skin of his fingers and arms. 

Quickly, Regulus’ habits turned into an addiction of sorts. The small fireplace in his bedroom hadn’t been used in months, but a small pile of wood and paper scraps remained. He began lighting small fires and leaving the metal poker in the coals until it became unreasonably hot. Without hesitation, Regulus began to brand the inside of his ankles and thighs with the rod. The pain of the burn was arousing in a way. Regulus eagerly welcomed the sensation, thrilled to finally be in control of his body for the first time in his life.

He should have known that sooner than later he’d get caught. The left leg of his trousers had been rolled up to about mid-thigh, with the poker just moments away from touching his skin, when Kreacher apparated into his room. The crack of the elf’s entrance scared Regulus into dropping the rod. It clattered to the floor, alarming both Regulus and Kreacher. 

“Master Regulus has a fire burning, yet it is quite warm out today. Why does Master Regulus require a fire?”

“I was just messing about,” Regulus quickly pulled his pant leg down, but Kreacher wasn’t stupid.

“Is Master Regulus hurt?”

“I’m fine, Kreacher. What do you want?”

“If Master Regulus needs assistance, it is Kreacher’s duty to help-”

“I’m fine !”

Kreacher dipped his head slightly, “Mistress Black wanted Kreacher to remind Master Regulus to prepare for the Malfoy’s dinner party tomorrow evening.”

“Right,” Regulus stood, dusting his hands off as he did so, “is that all?”

“Yes, Master Regulus.”

Kreacher continued to stand there, eying Regulus and the small fire he had created. 

“Well, go on then. Go clean a chandelier or something,” there was a bitterness in Regulus’ tone from the annoyance of both being interrupted and Kreacher’s lingering presence. 

“Master Regulus should be mindful of his actions. Master Regulus should know to ask for help from Kreacher if he needs it.”

“Yes, fine, whatever, just go,” Regulus waved his hand in Kreacher’s direction, but was unable to look at him as shame crept into his cheeks.

“Kreacher lives to serve the Noble House of Black,” and with the snap of his fingers, the elf was gone.

Pissed off by Kreacher, Regulus was unable to continue what he started and put the flames out with the heel of his boot. It was late in the evening and Regulus had already set out his robes for the Malfoy’s gathering. He didn’t need Walburga breathing down his neck and reminding him of their plans every five seconds. Regulus was actually eager to go, mostly so that he could get out of the house and see his friends. Evan had been sending postcards from France, while a steady flow of letters came in from Robin, Pandora, and Barty since they all returned home. Regulus had hardly answered any of them. There was only so much he could say in a letter; he felt ingenuine in his writing and would have much rather spoken to them all in person.

As he prepared for bed, Regulus fell into his normal nighttime routine which consisted of removing all outer layers of clothing, examining his scars, and compulsively checking his pulse multiple times over. The small scars on his fingers and arms had already begun to fade, but those on his legs were still freshly pink. He ran his fingers over the thin lines with the lightest touch, sending a chill up his spine. It had been a few days since Walburga had last visited Regulus alone. The thought of her seeing his burns and realizing how imperfect her perfect boy was, gave Regulus more of a reason to continue down his current path. He didn’t want to be perfect. He craved the blemishes on his skin, wanting more and more if it made Walburga detest and reject him. Since he couldn’t tell her no or physically deny her, he’d send the message in the only way he could.

Regulus wondered briefly if Lupin’s scars were the result of burning. Does Lupin do it on purpose, too? The idea of someone else possibly feeling what Regulus felt was invigorating. If that were the case, he wanted to know everything; what he used, how it started, how he feels during and after. How does something like that even come up in conversation? Regulus couldn’t exactly walk up to the boy and start talking about burning or scars. Lupin would think he’d gone mad. Though, perhaps he was. 

With his fingers pressed against his neck, Regulus thought only of his own scars as he felt his blood pump through his veins. He was overwhelmed with the desire for more, he needed to feel it. Regulus cursed Kreacher silently for ruining his evening. Squirming beneath his sheets, Regulus struggled to find peace in sleep. The only thing that got him through the night was the promise of seeing his friends the following day.

Chapter Text

July 1, 1973

Regulus had only ever heard stories of Malfoy Manor; great big hedges, pure white peacocks, magnificent gardens, and grand rooms with high ceilings. The stories didn’t do the family home justice. Maybe Regulus hadn’t truly understood Narcissa’s love for Lucius, but he did understand her taste for luxury. It was almost laughable how much money the Black family had, perhaps more than the Malfoys, yet it was spent so poorly. Why Regulus’ family lived in such a simple London home when they could easily afford a great big manor in the countryside was a mystery.  Upon taking the floo network into the Malfoy’s drawing room, Sirius let out a long whistle of appreciation. Regulus couldn’t have agreed more.

The Blacks were among the first to arrive, followed shortly by the Mulcibers and Barty. Robin, usually not the affectionate type, took Regulus in her arms so quickly he almost blacked out. He was slow to return the hug, his arms awkwardly wrapped around Robin’s small frame. While Robin was a bit shorter than most girls, her height almost matched Regulus’, and he couldn’t help but notice how her hair tickled his neck.

“Hi,” Robin whispered breathlessly, with her head tucked in Regulus’ shoulder.

Completely unable to process what was happening, Regulus’ brain seemed to short circuit. Only Pandora had ever treated Regulus with such care, and it definitely was not in Robin’s nature. Perhaps the embrace lasted longer than normal, for Michael cleared his throat in an acknowledging manner. 

There was no hiding the red which crept in both Regulus’ and Robin’s cheeks as they broke apart. The sudden interaction caused adrenaline to surge through Regulus, making his hands visibly shake. Off to the side, Sirius snickered, clearly amused by the scene. Regulus dreaded the bullying from his brother which would surely ensue once they were back home.

Barty’s smirk was borderline sinister as he moved to shake Regulus’ hand.

“Black,” he nodded, pulling Regulus from his daze.

“Crouch, how are you?” Regulus didn’t really care, but his formal manners had been involuntarily beaten into him for twelve years.

“Better now that I’m here with you lot,” Barty’s eyes wandered around the Malfoy’s drawing room, “bit more posh than I’m used to.”

Barty continued to look around with a neutral expression, clearly not entirely impressed with the manor as much as Sirius and Regulus had. Regulus couldn’t help but notice Robin’s eyes narrow in Barty’s direction. Clearly, Barty had been getting on Robin’s nerves in some form or another. Unexplainably, this made Regulus incredibly happy. 

With his hands stuffed in his pockets, Regulus slinked closer to Robin, trying very hard to act as cool and collected as possible. He leaned forward slightly, his back to the other boys who were now wandering aimlessly now that their chaperones had abandoned them.

“So, how have you been?” Regulus spoke softly, unable to fully meet Robin’s eyes.

She tucked her grown out bangs behind her ear; the movement, so casual, made Regulus’ breath hitch. “Barty and Michael are like two dragons in a nest, they’re absolutely unbearable. Barty has something smart to say about everything , and he’s been teaching Michael some of the dueling techniques Evan’s shown him. You’d think not being able to use magic would keep them from behaving like animals, but apparently not,” Robin concluded her brief rant with an exasperated sigh.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Regulus was sorry Robin was so annoyed, though he would have happily taken her place.

Robin waved her hand, “don’t worry about me. I’ve hardly heard from you since we’ve gone home, what’s going on?” 

Her tone suggested that Regulus didn’t need to tell her anything, she had already seen something. Regulus instinctively wanted to lie, but the small pull in his chest urged him to divulge his secrets. He had only ever confided in Sirius and that had blown up in his face. Since their return from Hogwarts, Regulus had been actively avoiding his brother for that precise reason. How much does she already know? The realization that Robin very well could have seen everything Regulus had been going through the past few weeks was both unbelievably frightening as well as relieving. If he didn’t have to verbalize what was going on then he wouldn’t really be letting down his guard. 

Taking Robin by the elbow, Regulus led her further away from the others, and she went along willingly. 

“What have you seen?” Regulus whispered, keeping his voice even, but his eyes were wide in terror.

“I don’t even want to say. I don’t know if it’s happened already, but it was horrible,” Robin fiddled uneasily with the sleeves of her olive green robe, “are you hurt?”

“Yes,” Regulus surprised himself with his own honesty, “but in more ways than one, I suppose.”

Robin nodded, “right. Is there anything I can do?”

Regulus only shook his head.

“Does anyone else know?” Robin sniffled slightly; Regulus hadn’t seen her cry in months and he did not want to be the reason for her to do so yet again. 

“Only Sirius. But I’m okay, erm, I will be okay. Don’t worry about me, alright?”

“I can’t help what I see, Black,” Robin hissed, her sadness for Regulus quickly turning to anger. 

“Yes, I know, I know,” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly, “what do you want me to say?”

“That you’ll stop hurting yourself!”

“Shh! Not so loud, Merlin,” Regulus pulled Robin further into the corner, “I’m not exactly hurting myself. I mean it does hurt, but it’s not painful. I know what I’m doing.”

“That doesn’t even make sense,” Robin shook Regulus’ hand off her arm.

“Well it does to me.”

The two stared at one another through their brows, neither breaking their glare. Both of them were undeniably stubborn, and maybe Regulus would have broken if not for the floo igniting. His attention drifted to the green flames, from which the Burke family emerged. Almost immediately, his stress and anger dissipated at the sight of Pandora. In contrast to everyone and everything around her, Pandora was the embodiment of Summer. Her blonde hair was longer and wilder than usual, and she wore a thin robe made from a light blue fabric with a floral patterned dress underneath it. Pandora looked painfully out of place, yet Regulus couldn’t stop the laughter which bubbled out of him.

“What on Earth are you wearing, Dora?”

The two embarrassed each other as if it were second nature - it was not nearly as awkward or mind altering as the greeting with Robin was. 

“I’m sorry I can’t stand to be as drab and miserable as you,” Pandora laughed.

“Oi! I am not drab and miserable !” Robin pushed her way between the two, bringing Pandora into a back breaking hug, “I’d just rather be dead than wear such ghastly robes.”

“Let’s agree to disagree, yeah?” Pandora couldn’t help the grin plastered across her face, and it was infectious, for Regulus found himself grinning, too.

“I can’t believe you’re actually here! From your letters, I was almost sure you wouldn’t be coming,” Robin stepped back, crossing her arms.

Pandora’s smile faded slightly, her hair turned a bit green before she shook it out, “yes, well, plans change. I’m just happy to see you both. Not the best of circumstances, but beggars can’t be choosers.”

“What was happening that would have made you not come?” Regulus asked.

“Don’t worry yourself, Reggie. It doesn’t matter, I’m here now aren’t I?” Pandora tried to remain upbeat, but her expression indicated that she’d fill him in later. 

“Just waiting on Frenchie, then,” Robin pushed her glasses up, “where is he, anyway?”

That was an excellent question. As Regulus looked about the drawing room, it seemed to have filled up quite a bit since his arrival. The Crabbe, Goyle, Snyde, Avery, Lestrange, Carrow, Travers, and Wilkes families - among many others - had arrived in droves; multiple generations, cousins, siblings, the works. Having studied wizarding family trees, many faces were easily recognizable, though Regulus hadn’t seen so many members of the same family in one room. Not even at the Black’s Christmas Gala. Since they were all related in some form or another, it was quite like one big family reunion. Regulus quickly pushed that thought from his mind. 

Though so many families were present, the Rosiers were not yet there.

“Maybe he’s stranded on the Rhine,” Barty was suddenly at Regulus’ shoulder.

“Merlin, Crouch! You can’t sneak up on people like that.”

“Just did,” Barty smirked as he rocked back on his heels. 

Robin rolled her eyes, “the past two days he’s been like this!”

“You’re almost as bad as Sirius.”

Barty brought his hand to his chest, “that hurts, Black, truly you can’t mean it.”

“Oh please,” Regulus rolled his eyes, “well, you ought to know, where is your little boyfriend, huh?”

The words just fumbled out of Regulus without much thought. Maybe if he had thought about it, he wouldn’t have said it. There was no denying the incredible amount of time the two boys spent together, but that did not warrant such an accusation. Sure, it was worded as a joke, but none of them could ignore the obvious blush in Crouch’s cheeks.

Barty stopped rocking, “what did you say?”

With a sigh, Regulus stared up at the chandeliered ceiling, silently cursing himself. Well, I might as well commit. 

“Your boyfriend, annoying Irish accent, stupid freckles, curly hair, about this tall,” Regulus raised his hand just below the top of his own head, “Evan Rosier? Don't shut up about going to France. You know where he’s at?”

It wasn’t long before Regulus was on the floor, Crouch throwing punches on top of him. Should have seen this coming. Barty only got one good hit in before Sirius and Prometheus were prying him off. Everyone was staring at them - everyone.

As Regulus got to his feet, he spotted Walburga and Orion just reentering the room. Walburga had her hands over her eyes in total shame, while Orion looked as if he was about to do the same to Regulus, himself. Well, if it wasn’t Sirius causing a scene, it had to be Regulus. The family motto really should have been: The Blacks live for drama. Regulus fully expected a public beating and scolding from his parents, but nothing happened. A strange calm fell over Regulus; he knew he should have been embarrassed, even nervous, but instead it was just an odd neutral feeling. Of course, it was Narcissa. She stood in the back of the crowd, Lucius on her arm, and the only way to find her in the midst of all the bodies was her platinum hair. Narcissa looked right through Regulus, stern but not angry, yet certainly frightening. Everyone was silent and unsure of how to proceed, until the floo ignited and out stepped Evan Rosier, followed by his parents.

Rosier came bounding through, truly expecting a party or at least more activity than what was presently going on. He was all smiles and bright eyes as he examined the room. Soon, the neutral calm everyone else was experiencing settled over the hyperactive boy and his parents. His excitement was quickly replaced with confusion. Then he spotted Barty, still being held back by Sirius and Prometheus. Evan’s head cocked slightly and his eyes narrowed - then he saw Regulus and the already forming bruise on his cheek.

“What did you say to him?” Evan marched forward.

Regulus put his hands up and backed away just as quickly as Evan approached, “not a word, he’s mad I tell you.”

Regulus could lie easily, but that didn’t mean he could lie well. 

“Forget it,” Barty growled, throwing Sirius and Prometheus off. 

Off to the side Michael laughed quietly to himself, then turned to Robin, “you can see when Sirius is about to get tea thrown in his face but not when Crouch starts throwing punches?”

“You know I can’t control it, Michael!”

Regulus glared at Barty, “well, she’s not getting married to Crouch, now is she?” 

At this Sirius audibly sighed. 

“Oh, Reggie,” Pandora whined.

“That’s enough ,” Robin hissed, “Black, a word please.”

Before Regulus knew it, he was being dragged out of the room and down a long corridor. The sound of the other guests’ voices picked up as the mingling resumed and Narcissa’s silent will diminished. The Malfoy home was not short of dark artifacts - Regulus could feel it all around him. What was most surprising was how clean and bright everything was. The drawing room appeared to be the darkest room in the family's home, as the rest of the manor was free of cobwebs and dust, with marble columns and cream colored stone walls. Sure, there were the usual dark colored throw rug or tapestry, and eerie paintings on the wall, but over-all Malfoy Manor was nice . 

 Robin threw Regulus into an open sitting room which was mostly bare aside from a few sofas, a fireplace, and a great chandelier. There were no portraits or book shelves or magical objects. It was simply empty. 

“What the bloody hell is wrong with you!”

Definitely a rhetorical question. So Regulus didn’t say a word. 

“You can’t keep doing this, Black! You’re supposed to be smart , so why don’t you keep your mouth shut and your hands to yourself, yeah? I don’t ever want to hear you say something negative about Sirius for as long as we live, because you are exactly like him! Stop instigating, be quiet, and blend in .”

Regulus scoffed, “I am nothing like Sirius.”

“That! That right there is exactly something he’d say. You both have so little regard for those around you and you think you can just get away with everything. Well, you can’t! There are rules we have to follow, Black, and you just keep breaking them.”

“What would you have me do then?”

“For starters, you shouldn’t go around accusing people of being queer . You almost got the shite beat out of you-”

“Crouch can hardly throw a punch.”

“ And you could seriously ruin their lives. It’s not a laughing matter. If someone genuinely believes that they’re gay , it wouldn’t be so far-fetched to believe they’d be killed over it.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Robin, please , it was a joke. Let it go.”

“Not until you swear to shut up.”

“Robin, come on-”

“Swear it!”

“Fine, I swear to shut up. Happy?”

“Yes,” Robin crossed her arms and shook her hair from her face, “and for the record, my arrangement with Sirius has absolutely nothing to do with my visions.”

“Thank Merlin for that,” Regulus mumbled.

Robin shot him a warning glare, but continued, “I know you have a lot going on, but you can’t use that as an excuse to act out. We all have a lot going on, but you don’t see me or Pandora brawling.”

“I’d actually like to see that.”

“Like to see what?” Pandora poked her head in through the open door.

“Nothing,” Regulus and Robin answered. 

It seemed as Robin had dragged Regulus down the hall, his robes had gotten disheveled, leaving his forearm bare and his scars clearly visible. Pandora’s eyes locked onto the damaged skin and grew wide with alarm. As her face paled, her hair drained of all color, leaving it dull and gray and lifeless. Regulus quickly pulled his sleeve down, but the damage had already been done.

“Oh, here we go,” Robin mumbled.

“Dora, it’s really not as bad as it looks, I promise.”

“Those aren’t magically inflicted scars, Reggie,” Pandora rushed over and pulled Regulus’ sleeve up, “these are splotchy and uneven. Reggie, these look awfully painful.”

Regulus pulled his arm back, “I’m fine, really,” he tried to play it cool, but he couldn’t help the waver in his voice.

It was one thing for Robin to know, she couldn’t help what she saw and Regulus could accept that. Pandora was so sweet and innocent; Regulus’ struggles were never something he wanted her to know about, much less worry about. 

“Did your mother do this?” Pandora kept her eyes on the floor.

“No, I- no, no she didn’t.”

Pandora’s eyes shot up; the blue of her iris enhanced by the bloodshot from her tears.

“Regulus, tell me you didn’t.”

Knowing the truth, Robin sighed and turned her back to her friends. Regulus knew she was crying and couldn’t stand to have them see. 

“May-be,” Regulus tried desperately to keep his voice light.

“Reggie, are you okay? Like do you need help ?”

“Probably not, and definitely not,” Regulus shook his head vigorously.

Robin whirled around, tears streaming down her face, “of course he needs help! But he’s not going to accept any from us.”

“Stop it, I’m fine.”

Robin ignored him, “it’s because of his mother. He and Sirius both need to get out of that house. I-”

“ Robin ,” Regulus interjected, “don’t.”

“If we talked about it, if we told someone, we can help you.”

Regulus shook his head, “you can’t say a word.”

Pandora’s eyes darted between the two of them, “what aren’t you telling me, Regulus?”

“There’s nothing to tell.”

“Don’t lie to me!” Pandora shouted, stomping her foot, “everyone treats me like I’m some delicate, fragile thing, but I can handle it! You all walk on eggshells around me, but you have no idea what I’m capable of handling.”

Robin tried to sooth her friend, “nobody is diminishing what you’re capable of, Dora.”

“We all deal with shite at home, Pandora. It’s better if we just ignore it and move on. It’s not a competition,” Regulus just really wanted the conversation to be over.

“That’s not at all what I’m trying to say, and you know that! Everybody’s been treating me differently since- since I made amends. I want things to go back to the way they were, but I constantly feel like I’m being left out.” 

“ That’s what this is about?” Robin laughed sarcastically, “Regulus is over here burning himself on purpose and you’re upset because you feel excluded?”

“That’s not what I meant! I’m your friend and I want to be treated as such. So, let me help!”

Regulus stepped between the two girls, “Pandora, listen to me. You are still my best friend and I promise I am okay and I will tell you if and when I need something. Okay?”

Pandora gave a teary nod. 

“Robin, this is really not the time or place to be a superhero. I appreciate your concern, but we are not going to keep talking about this right now.”

“Fine,” she aggressively pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. 

“Are we good here?” bitterness laced Regulus’ tone. 

Both girls nodded somberly.

“Right. Then I’d like to move on from this sob fest,” Regulus moved his way between his two friends and made for the door. When he opened it, Abraxas Malfoy stood before him. Unbelievably tall, his shadow engulfed Regulus. The man’s receding hairline was pulled back into a face-tugging ponytail, allowing all his stern and haunting facial features to be clearly visible. Though he didn’t have a use for it, a sleek black cane was gripped firmly in his right hand. Lucius’ father scowled down at the youngest Black and then his eyes trailed up and into the room where Pandora and Robin were still wiping away their tears.  

“Why are you not in the drawing room with the others?” he growled.

Robin straightened her shoulders, “I apologize Mister Malfoy, it was my fault. Pandora was just coming to get us.”

Abraxas’ lip curled, “Mulciber is it? I’ve heard about you and your family. Why Walburga and Orion have promised their heir to you is still something I adamantly oppose. Names change constantly, but dirty blood will always be dirty blood.”

“Her blood is not dirty!” Regulus may have sworn to keep his mouth shut, but who was he to keep a promise?

Malfoy’s head snapped in Regulus’ direction, “tell that to her mudblood grandmother. You should have more sense than to raise your voice at me, Black!” He turned his attention back to the girls, “get out, get out, now! Before I curse each one of you. Your parents will certainly be hearing about this.”

Regulus opened his mouth, ready to continue to defend Robin. Before he could, Robin and Pandora had a hand on each of his arms, guiding him swiftly from the room. He allowed it easily, eager to get away from Abraxas, but he knew the two of them would scold him later. Regulus was truly incapable of sitting back and doing nothing; he always had to intervene and he knew that would lead him into serious trouble one day. One day. Maybe if he could have taken Robin’s advice - kept his promise - then he’d learn to stay out of things that didn’t directly impact him. But he was twelve and stupid and didn’t have that kind of foresight. None of them did back then.

When the three young Slytherins found themselves back in the drawing room, everyone was seated at a long marble table in the center of the room which had not been there previously. At the head of the table was Lord Voldemort himself, though he was more snakelike and nightmare inducing than he’d been the last time Regulus saw him. To Voldemort’s right was Bella and to his left… Robin's father. Bella at the Dark Lord’s right hand made plenty of sense to Regulus, but the proximity of Mulciber sr. was unexpected. When Regulus turned to Robin, she was already taking her seat among the other Hogwarts’ students. Pandora was right beside her, leaving Regulus alone in the doorway like an idiot.

There was an open seat between Sirius and Cissy, which Regulus carefully crawled into. Sirius’ eyes were downcast, focused on a bit of string in his lap which he was tangling and untangling into a cat’s cradle. To Regulus’ right, Cissy dropped her hand, palm up, beside his knee. Without a second thought, he clasped his hand in hers, intertwining their fingers. Blissful calm swept over him in an instant. He could kind of hear Narcissa in his head telling him that everything would be just fine. He believed her, too.

Side conversations ceased as Abraxas entered the room and shut the large wooden doors behind him. As the senior Malfoy took his seat, all eyes turned to the Dark Lord. There was an eerie silence which filled the room, like time had stopped and everyone was holding their breath, their lungs were burning for air. Regulus shifted nervously in his seat. Sirius, unbothered per usual, continued to twist his yarn into knots. Robin and Pandora sat opposite Regulus, both with their hands neatly folded before them on the table and their shoulders perfectly straight, bookended by their brothers. The girls looked more innocent and fragile next to their broad and adolescent brothers; but Michael and Prometheus didn’t look like protectors, instead they looked like their prison guards. The observation made Regulus unnecessarily angry. He wanted to do something , but he had no idea what. Cheeks burning, Regulus quickly turned his attention away. 

“Thank you all for joining me today,” the Dark Lord hardly had to raise his voice in order for everyone to hear him, “I hope to make today’s meeting as brief as possible. I know we all have… things to take care of when we leave here.”

Regulus kept his eyes locked forward. He did not want to know who shifted or glanced around at those words. Ignorance is bliss.

“The headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has repeatedly denied my request to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts.”

Those words made Sirius drop his yarn and actually pay attention.

“Due to Dumbledore’s inability to let me teach, I’ve unfortunately had to take matters into my own hands. See, if I cannot teach the class, then nobody can. Mulciber, please bring in our guest.”

Robin’s father cautiously left the table and scurried down a narrow set of stone steps in the far corner of the room. Nobody spoke as they all waited for his return. Minutes later, though it felt like an eternity, Muciber returned pushing along a badly beaten and disheveled middle aged man. On the top step, the man tripped and fell hard to the floor. Regulus flinched as he struck the marble floor, as did many of the other children present. Most others just laughed. Mulciber picked the man up by his armpit and threw him forward. He stumbled as he came closer to the table. As his bearded and bruised face came into the light, Regulus recognized this “guest” of theirs.

“Jonathan Wright, former professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts,” Voldemort announced.

Professor Wright, though not one of Regulus’ favorites, was a dutiful man and undeniably talented. Many students at Hogwarts looked to Professor Wright to help them with not only school work, but personal issues as well. He was a father figure to many, as Regulus heard many of the older students say. What Regulus also heard many older students say, specifically Slytherin students, was “Professor mudblood.” Jonathan Wright was the only muggle-born Professor at Hogwarts that year and had been for many years prior.

“I’m taking matters into my own hands. From this point on, Hogwarts will be replacing Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers just as quickly as they allow mudbloods through their doors. Jonathan Wright is the first of many professors who will never see those halls again.”

Mulciber pushed Wright into an open chair. Regulus’ professor could hardly keep his head up, as it swiveled across his shoulders loosely. As his head rolled back, Regulus caught the sight of the man’s eyes. They locked on each other briefly before Mulciber casted crucio .

He tortured him until his heart gave out.

Jonathan Wright was dead.

Everyone saw it.

The only sound in that drawing room which Regulus could even register was the shrill laughter from his cousin Bellatrix. The former professor’s body fell to the floor - limp and lifeless. Then the meeting continued as normal. At some point the body was dragged out, but Regulus just stared at the floor where Professor Wright once was. He couldn’t process anything. He couldn’t do anything. Regulus was blinking and breathing and alive, he knew that well enough. But Professor Wright was dead. Murdered. Right in front of everyone. He didn’t even have the strength to fight back. He might as well have died before he’d ever gotten there. 

Chapter Text

September 1, 1973

Regulus blinked and he was back on the Hogwarts Express. When asked about his Summer holiday, he could only shrug. Every day after July first was a blur. Sirius had left at some point; he wasn’t allowed at Potter’s, so he went to the Burke’s instead. Sirius and Prometheus weren’t even on speaking terms, but having witnessed the same traumatizing event, they both needed a flying partner to pass the time and forget. Walburga let him go gladly, assuming the events which transpired at Malfoy Manor had turned Sirius into a dutiful son. For a week straight Pandora had written to Regulus, asking him to join Sirius and stay with her. Regulus never answered. 

The Slytherin train car was almost entirely silent the whole ride to Hogwarts. Normally, Regulus and his friends would have preferred a private compartment, but they each had an unspoken desire to be around others. Those who hadn’t been present at Malfoy Manor had quickly learned about what happened there. The entirety of Slytherin House was sworn to secrecy by Lucius and Narcissa, as everyone feared for the safety of their loved ones. A new pact had been formed across years, tying the Slytherins together with a strength they didn’t know was possible. Any hostilities or rivalries were quickly dissolved and replaced with a mutual understanding and respect. They were all in this - whatever this was - and they needed the strength in numbers.

Exiting the Hogwarts Express went a bit differently than it had the year prior. While the first years were taken to the boats, everyone else was led towards the carriages. Overcome with exhaustion, Regulus and his friends were slow to follow down the path. There were hushed conversations all around them and Regulus was focused on nothing but the ground in front of him. The small group of second years came to a halt as they bumped into the older boys ahead of them.

“Oi, Mulciber! Pick up the pace would  you?” Regulus snapped. 

Regulus picked his head up, expecting some kind of altercation. Instead he found himself staring between Michael and Prometheus’ heads at a great winged black horse. It was massive and boney and absolutely terrifying. Regulus recognized the creature well enough from his books. A thestral. Every student who had been at the Malfoy’s on July first had stopped in their tracks, fear paralyzing them all in place. 

“What is it?” Pandora whispered, entirely in awe.

“A thestral,” both Regulus and Robin responded.

Regulus shot Robin a look; she was unbothered and not nearly as nervous as her fellow Slytherins. How do you know about thestrals? He wanted to ask, but Robin was already moving to board the carriage. Slowly, everyone filed in but nobody said a word or further questioned the winged beats. They made their way back to Hogwarts in silence. 

Anyone who wasn’t a Slytherin was in high spirits and riding out the Summer high even as they returned to Hogwarts. It had been an unusually hot Summer, which Regulus spent inside and purposefully isolated, so he didn’t understand everyone else’s enthusiasm about the weather. After the welcome back feast, Regulus welcomed the cool dampness of the dungeons. He buried his face in the fresh linens on his dormitory bed, breathing in the clean scent. For quite a few minutes Regulus laid there flat on his stomach, allowing his muscles to relax. He was happy - no, relieved - to be back at Hogwarts. It would take something much greater than a change of scenery to make Regulus truly happy, but for the time being he wouldn’t complain. 

Karasi jumped up on his back, kneaded at his shirt, then curled up into a tight ball. Well that settled it, Regulus would not be getting out of bed for the rest of the evening. Just as his eyes started to close, the curtain around his bed was ripped open. Subsequently, Regulus groaned into his pillow as Karasi sprang off the bed. 

“What do you want ?” Regulus mumbled.

“Drop the attitude, Black.”

Tilting his head slightly, Regulus opened one eye and found Robin between the curtains of his bed, hands on her hips, and a scowl on her face. She threw open the curtains and Regulus winced as the light hit him. 

“Get up, let’s go.”

“ Go ? Go where?” Regulus rolled onto his side.

“For a walk. Come on,” Robin turned before Regulus could protest.

Struggling to put his shoes on, Regulus half jogged half hopped to keep up with his friend as Robin exited the common room into the dungeon halls. In just one summer, Robin had a new air about her. She seemed older, hardened maybe. Though, most of them were in comparison to the September prior. It wasn’t difficult to notice the change in how Robin carried herself; stronger and more confident. No longer that shy little girl Regulus had met on the Hogwarts Express. They’d both grown quite a bit and stood around the same height, making Robin quite a bit taller than the other girls in their year. 

They made their way out of the dungeons and towards the clock tower courtyard. The halls were empty and their footsteps carried an echo that Regulus was sure Mrs. Norris would hear. They still had an hour till curfew, but Regulus was already starting the new year with two weeks worth of detention. He didn’t want anymore. Robin kept an annoyingly fast pace, her robes billowing behind her. 

“If you keep walking like that, I’ll be forced to compare you to Snape.”

Robin rolled her eyes, “if you keep talking like that, I’ll be forced to compare you to Sirius.”

“No need, my detentions are already doing that for me.”

This earned him a small chuckle. In his peripheral vision, he caught Robin’s lips curl slightly into a smile and remain that way. A surge of pride caused Regulus to walk with a bit more bounce in his step and hold his chin up as Robin did. Regulus imagined the two of them walking in such a manner years from now when they both become prefects; or better yet, Head Boy and Girl. There was no doubt in Regulus’ mind that they could pull that off, with only Barty being his true competition. Pandora matched Robin in academics, but lacked the spine needed to be an authority figure. So far, none of the students in other houses came close to their achievements. However, there were still two years ahead of them before being made prefects, which allowed for anyone to have an equal chance. Regulus was already diminishing his odds with the detentions he had secured and vowed right then and there not to receive anymore.

The path down to the Standing Stones was rigid and difficult to see under the night sky. Humidity hung in the air and glued Regulus’ robes to his bare skin. He hated the feeling and cringed with disgust as he pulled on the hems of his clothes. Worse yet was the way his curls frizzed and stuck to the nape of his neck. He was sure he looked like an absolute mess. How embarrassing.

“Would you stop messing around?” Robin hissed, “you’re making me anxious.”

Regulus snorted, “I didn’t know you were capable of such emotions.”

Robin shot him a sideways glare.

“I already long for the first snowfall of the season,” he mumbled, swatting gnats from his face. 

“Agreed, but unless you have a spell to make it snow whenever you’d like, I’d say you’re out of luck.”

Regulus made a mental note about the snow spell. Thoughts of how delighted Robin would be at the sight of her own personal flurry brought a blush to Regulus’ cheeks. Then the realization that she’d likely see it coming diminished that light inside of him. How was he ever supposed to do anything without her noticing? Robin continued to march forward and Regulus quickened his pace.

“Where are you dragging me to? It’s the first night back, and I was so cozy and relaxed.”

“Have I ever told you how my mother passed?”

The question almost stopped Regulus in his tracks. What did Robin’s mother passing have to do with their journey across the grounds in the middle of the night? 

“No, I can’t say you have.”

And Regulus had never thought to ask.

“Father did love her once. A long time ago. They met at Hogwarts and he was quite a bit older than her, though I don’t recall by how much. Having been raised in the Wizarding world, but still feeling like she didn’t belong, my mother was determined to make something of herself. When father took an interest in her, she believed he’d solve all her problems. The Mulciber name carried some weight back then.”

Robin turned to face Regulus to make sure he was listening. He clung to every word. Robin never spoke so much in one go.

“They shared many values and goals and father didn’t care about her dirty blood. She was as good enough a witch as anyone, nobody could deny that. But when they were in school, my dad ran with Riddle, Avery, and Lestrange. You can imagine how well his friends took to his interest in a younger and less pure witch. They were amused by the idea at first, calling my mother ‘Pet.’ Then they got married, mum dropped out of Hogwarts, and had Michael and I. Tom Riddle didn’t like the fact that my father, his friend, had made a life with the girl who was supposed to be his pet. So, he killed her. Rather, had her killed. I was three, but I remember it well.”

They were nearing the groundskeeper’s hut. Pumpkins sprouted up around them and a warm glow came from the windows of the hut. It was too peaceful of scenery for such a story. Regulus’ stomach was in knots as they continued down the gravel path and he was unwilling to stop Robin’s account to ask why they were here of all places.

“It’s hard to forget witnessing a murder, and equally difficult to forget hearing the use of an unforgivable for the first time not once, but twice. First, my father was imperio’d, then he was using the killing curse himself. Right in front of me. Of course, he didn’t know I was there. Michael and I had been playing hide and seek and I could always see when Michael was coming and find a new spot. He could never find me so the games lasted hours. I was hiding in the cupboard in the kitchen when I heard the Dark Lord enter. I peaked out between the crack of the door and I saw it all .”

“Why are you telling me this, Robin?”

They were now at the threshold of the groundskeeper’s hut. The light from within casted a haunting orange glow across Robin’s hardened and tear stained face.

“Because I want you to understand what we’re up against.”

As the last word was spoken, the door swung open to reveal the largest man Regulus had ever seen. Of course he recognized the groundskeeper from the previous year, but had never been so close to the man. He filled the entire doorway and casted a menacing shadow over the two young wizards.

“Ello there, Robin! It was gettin’ late, thought you’d never come!” Hagrid chuckled to himself, his large belly bouncing as he did so. 

Regulus straightened up, his initial fear of the man fading away.

“Yeh brought a friend, I see! Rubeus Hagrid, nice to meetcha!” Hagrid offered his hand for Regulus to shake and nearly crushed the boy’s forearm in the process. 

“Regulus Black,” he mumbled, rubbing his aching arm.

“Well, let’s not keep those thestrals waitin’, I reckon they get hungrier at night. Got a whole sack a raw chicken ‘ere for ‘em.”

Hagrid made his way out the door with a sack over his shoulder, and Robin right at his heels. Regulus didn’t even have time to wrap his mind around the whole exchange, and jogged to catch up. 

“Robin, what are we doing?” Regulus whispered as they trailed the half giant.

“We’re going to feed some thestrals,” she spoke gleefully, pushing the hair from her eyes.

“Yes, but why?”

“Not many people can even see thestrals, Black. They’re lonely creatures and often wait until the brink of starvation to actually hunt. So Hagrid and I often visit them and feed them. It’s really quite special.”

“You’ve done this before?” Regulus was stunned.

Robin just shrugged, “usually once a week.”

Once a week? Regulus had never even noticed Robin sneaking off for these little ventures. How had he missed this?

“What prompted you to start visiting thestrals? Especially with the groundskeeper?” Perhaps that last bit came off a bit judgemental. Robin stiffened at his tone.

“You may recall that bit of time you spent alone last autumn?”

Regulus nodded.

“It was during that time I had seen a thestral from the library window. It was just a baby and stood at the edge of the forest. It was the first time I’d even seen one and-and I just couldn’t take my eyes off it. Then Hagrid came around and began to feed the poor thing. I watched for a few more minutes before I scooped up my belongings and headed out the door. I’ll admit, it was hard work earning their trust, but it was worth it.”

“You always do this alone?”

“Well, I’ve got Hagrid, but yes. Nobody else could see them before now.”

“You could have asked Pandora to come here with you.”

Robin shook her head, “Pandora needs time. She was writing to me all summer about her nightmares. I don’t think the thestrals will help much with that.”

“So, why share this secret with me?”

“You knew what they were even without having seen them before. How?”

“My wand core is thestral tail hair, I’ve been naturally drawn to the creatures ever since I got my wand.”

Robin’s eyes grew large, “ thestral tail hair ? Really? Black, that is exceedingly rare. The only other wand I’m even familiar with having that core is an urban legend. Are you sure?”

“Pretty sure,” Robin’s questioning was almost offensive.

“Well, ‘ere we are! Best take an easy approach, aye?” Hagrid hearty voice snapped Regulus’ attention forward. 

In the clearing were about six thestrals; four adults and two babes. Some sat on the ground while the others paced back and forth. This time Regulus was able to get a real good look at the winged horses. Their skin was slick and leathery, their bones threatening to rip through the thin hairless hide. The most unsettling were their eyes; the blackest of black and seemingly endless. 

“I wouldn’t get too close, now,” Hagrid spoke gently, “let em get used to yeh first. They’ll sniff around yeh in a mo - amazin’ sense of smell these beauts have.”

Waiting no time at all, Robin was elbow deep in a sack of raw meat, and tossing pieces at the little ones. The baby thestrals leapt up to catch the meat in their beak-like mouths. The gnashing of teeth on the raw chicken was unsettling, to say the least. Regulus watched as pure glee spread across Robin’s face. That was a bit unsettling, too. It was difficult to make sense of what Regulus was seeing; too much information all at once. 

“This one is Elvira,” Robin gestured to the smallest of the two baby thestrals, “and this is Nyx.”

Nyx was missing her left hind leg.

“What happened to her?”

“Caught in a bear trap of all things!” Hagrid bellowed, “a true muggle contraption right ‘ere in the forest! Professor Kettleburn set her right, but it still breaks me heart.”

The thought of another student sneaking out into the forest to set up traps infuriated Regulus. What could possibly make someone do something like that? Regulus stared at the small thestral, who walked unsteadily across the clearing. The tiny creature pulled at his heart.

“She’s okay,” Robin’s sudden appearance at Regulus’ shoulder made him jump, “don’t get too in your head about it. I tried to find who put the traps out and it ate me for weeks. It doesn’t affect her ability to fly, though, which is good.”

“How many others know they’re out here?”

“The professors, of course. Most students who can see them stay far away. But now, I gather most of Slytherin is going to start asking questions.”

Regulus simply nodded along.

Thrilled to actually see the creatures, but horrified by the means to successfully do so, Regulus could only stare in awe at the cluster of black winged horses. It was such a shame that one had to witness something so horrible in order to see something so spectacular. The pictures in the books didn’t do them justice. 

“Can I touch them?” Regulus asked hesitantly, afraid his hand may just slip right through them, as if they were ghosts. 

“Give them something to eat first. It’s better you approach the oldest male, his name is Azrael, then the rest will feel at ease,” Robin proceeded to slap a piece of raw flesh into Regulus’ bare hands. 

Azrael, clearly the oldest as he was beginning to gray, was sitting at the far end of the clearing with his legs tucked up under him. Regulus walked slowly past the rest of the thestrals, who all stared at him with haunting eyes, watching him like the portraits back at Grimmauld Place. Regulus surprised himself in that he wasn’t afraid of the threstrals, not even slightly put off by them. They couldn’t help what they were; forever a creature associated with death and feared by most. Maybe if more people could see them, could walk right up to them and feed them, then they wouldn’t be perceived as so dangerous or frightening. 

From an arm’s length away, Regulus held out his open palm for Azrael to sniff. The old thestral lowered his head into Regulus’ hand. His leathery skin was soft to the touch and surprisingly warm. Regulus broke into a wide grin when Azrael gently took the chicken breast and ate it slowly as if savering each bite.

“Well done, Black!” Hagrid clapped his hands.

With Azrael fed, he allowed Regulus to stroke his mane, which appeared to be the finest silk Regulus had ever laid eyes upon. It felt like water in his hands.

“Do you know where Ollivander gets the thestral tail hairs? Does he come out here and get them himself?” Regulus inquired.

“I don’t reckon Ollivander has been out ‘ere in quite some time, but yes, he gets the hairs from Hogwarts’ herd. Likely from Azrael ‘imself, he is the most friendly.”

Regulus pulled his wand out from within his robes. He wasn’t sure if he could feel the magic radiating from its core or if he was just imagining it. Holding the wand out to Azrael, Regulus wasn’t entirely sure what the thestral would do, or if it would even respond. If anything, the creature likely thought Regulus was mad. 

Azrael cocked his head to the side, his gaze set upon Regulus’ outstretched hand. Perhaps he was confused by the lack of food he’d come to expect. Then he raised his head, looked right at Regulus, eyes locked on and nodded. Nodded. Just once. Like he understood what Regulus was silently asking. With no hesitation, Regulus was firm in his belief that Azrael gave the hair that made his wand. Not many wizards could say they met the creature which gave them their tool. 

“Thank you,” Regulus whispered.

Azrael gave a weak whiny as he nuzzled his head into Regulus’ chest. True happiness, something Regulus truly hadn’t expected, erupted from deep within him. Laughter, as well as tears, came pouring out of him as he continued to pet the elder thestral. How could anyone be afraid of you? Regulus asked himself, with his forehead pressed against Azrael’s.

Chapter Text

November 2, 1973

Overnight everything changed. It wasn’t just Regulus who actively chose to forget about the events which transpired over the Summer holiday. After that first weekend back, all of Slytherin House had seemingly moved on. Though, other students were whispering about what had happened to Professor Wright. His death had been covered in the Daily Prophet, citing that dark wizards had murdered him, but there were very few details about the incident itself. The less everyone else knew, the better. The Defense Against the Dark Arts position was quickly filled by Elysen Lament; an elderly witch who had once been an auror and worked heavily on various projects within the walls of Azkaban. She never spoke about her time working at Azkaban, though that was all students wanted to learn from her. Certainly, she was a fountain of knowledge, but Regulus knew all too well that her days were numbered. The Dark Lord's threat was clear, DADA professors were not guaranteed safety within the walls of Hogwarts. The impending doom of the kind, old Professor Lament was something most of Slytherin house was quick to look past in order to stay on track. What could they have possibly done to help her, anyway? 

There were plenty other things to worry about, of course. Homework, Quidditch, Peeves, birthdays, detentions, dueling club, frog choir, the list went on and on. The one thing that was noticeably not on anyone's list was dying. The only ever present reminder of death were the thestrals, but only Regulus and Robin had been to visit them. The others all looked the other way. For Black and Mulciber, there was life in death. They were quicker to accept that.

Just by pure coincidence, or maybe Hagrid had suggested it, Regulus spent his detentions with the groundskeeper and professor Kettleburn. It wasn’t just the thestrals Regulus was taking care of those first few weeks. He was introduced to a colony of bowtruckles, de-gnomed the training grounds, helped relocate some flobberworms, and learned how to incubate diricawl eggs. By the end of his two week detention, he was weeding Hagrid’s garden - and enjoying it. Everyday he returned to the dungeons smelly, sweaty, dirty, and happy. He enjoyed his detentions so much that he just kept going back to Hagrid and Kettleburn day after day. It occured to Regulus about half way through October that not only had he not heard from either of his parents since arriving at Hogwarts, but he felt absolutely no need to hurt himself. Allowing himself to be preoccupied with all the castle's various creatures and give into that joy made him forget all about home.

At the end of each week, Robin and Regulus would trek down to Hagrid’s hut and feed the thestrals. It was during these outings Robin admitted to Regulus that Pandora was still crying in her sleep. During the day she was all sunshine and rainbows (quite literally as she often changed her appearance for the amusement of others), but behind closed doors, Pandora was a mess. For months she struggled; her nightmares weighing her down and snuffing out her light. Maybe the others didn’t notice or didn’t want to ask, but it was impossible to ignore. In those brief moments at meal times or walking between classes when the attention wasn’t on Pandora, she curled in on herself. Her eyes cast down, her gold hair faded slowly, and her shoulders curled forward. She’d blend in with her surroundings like a demiguise or a chameleon ghoul; like she was trying to become a shadow. Merlin knew she very well could, if she really put her mind to it.

On that particular November Friday, things began to shift. Second Years didn’t have classes on Fridays, but that didn’t excuse them from normal meal times, nor did it grant them unlimited access to the grounds and halls during class hours. Regulus and his friends designated this time for the library or flying. However, on that particular Friday, Quidditch tryouts were being held after lunch. Regulus would finally be trying out for Seeker. Until then, Regulus and his friends hunkered down in the library. As Regulus roamed the shelves of books, he couldn’t help but notice hushed voices coming from the corner of the history section. History of Magic was a dull subject, where the grades were simply a product of how well a student paid attention and required no real skill. The history section of Hogwarts’ library was where books went to die, as noted by the extraordinary layers of dust. It was most uncommon for students to be back there.

“I’m telling you, there has to be a book about it. Or at least a book that just mentions it,” a young male voice aggressively whispered, urgency in his tone.

“Look, Jacob, I’m not saying you’re wrong, but-”

“The letter said I’d know where to look, I wouldn’t just make something up as crazy as anonymous letters or cursed vaults !”

Regulus pulled a book off a nearby shelf and peered through the open space to get a look at the voices. Two boys, in Slytherin robes, had their backs to Regulus. The taller one, Jacob, was pulling books off the shelves and barely glancing at them before hastily putting them back. The other boy had his arms crossed, annoyance visible in his posture.

“Did you ask Olivia about it? I bet she knows,” the second boy didn’t seem confident in his suggestion.

“Yeah, I talked to her about it. She can’t make out the handwriting and she’s only heard of the vaults, but knows absolutely nothing about them otherwise,” Jacob was clearly exasperated.

“Well, she would know-”

“I know she would know, Ashe!”

Ashe threw his hands up, “don’t start with me, Jacob. I’m just as willing to find all this gold and shite, too, but we need a plan.”

Duncan Ashe and Jacob Goldstein. Third Year Slytherins. They were typically found with the Ravenclaws and were known for staying far away from Snape and Mulciber and most other Slytherins for that matter. Jacob had a knack for getting into trouble and reminded Regulus fondly of Sirius. Aside from being in the same house, Regulus knew very little about the two boys, but that was mostly because they were never around. Duncan’s twin sister Susan was good friends with Dorcas and Lauren, but Regulus didn’t talk much to them either. Even in their own house there were cliques. 

“There are five vaults. The plan is to find a clue that gets us to the first one.”

“Which is?”

“Ice. I think.”

“You think ? Merlin, Jacob, do you even know what you’re doing?”

“Not yet, but I will soon,” Jacob turned to face Duncan, tapped on the cover of a newly procured book and left the history section with his friend in tow. 

The idea of cursed vaults, vaults containing various treasures , intrigued Regulus. Though he was left with the same limited amount of knowledge as Jacob Goldstein, and there wasn’t much else to go off of. If anyone could get more information though, it would be Pandora. Regulus rushed back to where his friends were sitting, the table by the window in the astronomy section (as always), and recounted what he had heard.

Barty scoffed, “that’s an urban legend, Black, everyone knows that.”

Regulus narrowed his brows and stuck out his tongue, “well, what if it’s not, huh?”

“If they’re called the cursed vaults, then aren’t they going to be, you know, cursed ?” Robin pushed up her glasses.

In one motion, Regulus pulled out a chair, swung it around, and sat on it backwards, his chin resting on the back, “okay, well, yes. But , there could be cool stuff inside. Ashe mentioned gold.”

“Maybe if we had a bit more information?” Pandora bit her bottom lip apprehensively, but the gold in her hair grew brighter.

“I was sold the second you ran over,” Rosier grinned, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so excited about anything. Except of course before you go prancing through the corridors with Robin every Friday night.”

Regulus kicked Evan from under the table. The sound of his boot colliding with the other boy’s shin did not go unnoticed. Both Robin and Pandora blushed at the hinted accusation. 

“What do you say,” Regulus was looking only at Pandora, “interested in digging up some cursed vaults?”

“I suppose so,” Pandora looked up to meet Regulus’ gaze, but something behind him caught her eye, “oh no, Reggie! Look at the time!”

Regulus turned to find the clock up on the wall reading five of one. 

“Oh, bloody hell, I’m late!”

Regulus didn’t even bother picking up his belongings as he bolted for the door.

Behind him he could hear Evan mumble, “I can’t believe we missed lunch.”

***

Thank Merlin for Narcissa Black. 

As Regulus sprinted onto the training grounds, he could see Narcissa chatting away with Madam Hooch. The other house captains all had their arms crossed and scowls across their faces. Cissy was stalling. She spotted Regulus from the corner of her eye and immediately deflated. Cissy abruptly ended the conversation and made a beeline for Reggie.

“Where have you been?” She hissed.

“Library,” Regulus panted, “lost track of time.”

Narcissa brought her hand to the back of Regulus’ neck, a much gentler touch than he had anticipated, and guided him towards the other Slytherins. The group which awaited them were just as expected. Very rarely would someone randomly appear and try to take someone else’s spot. And nobody tried out if Narcissa hadn’t already deemed them good enough. Especially after Snape’s debut last year. In a more recent development, Lucius had decided to leave the team; citing his N.E.W.T.S. as to why. Regulus knew better than to believe that and Narcissa was seemingly unbothered by the decision. That left a vacant keeper position, which Narcissa shockingly took up.

“I started as a keeper,” she shrugged, “anyway, it’s time I train somebody better and younger,” she winked at Regulus.

Aside from Regulus, the only other second year trying out was Dorcas. She was a promising chaser and beater. Knowing the team was young and the only person leaving was Lucius, she gracefully accepted a B-team slot. This was all decided long before tryouts even began. The afternoon was spent solely showing off. Slytherin had a title to defend, after all. 

Ravenclaw still proved to be Slytherin’s greatest threat, though Gryffindor had pulled up most of their B-team players from the year prior. Marlene McKinnon was now a permanent chaser, with Katie Carter as the new seeker. For drills, Regulus had only Davey Gudgeon to compete against. They were the only two seekers trying out for the first time, but both had secured spots on their respective teams, as they were both unopposed. Gudeon was pretty unremarkable. The young Hufflepuff was much slower than Regulus; with an older broom and a slightly thicker build, he didn’t glide as easily as a seeker should. Regulus immediately disregarded Davey as any kind of threat for the upcoming season. It was Katie and Siobhan who posed a challenge. Katie, Regulus could handle with a little practice. Siobhan had given Narcissa a run for her money every season prior and the two had formed a long lasting rivalry. That was who Regulus had to worry about.

Tryouts came and went with little issues. Though, Sirius had to try out again , alongside second year Dirk Cresswell. Both boys were left to B-team. Regulus wasn’t sure what Sirius had expected. Both Prewetts were the Gryffindor beaters and they weren’t going anywhere. Sure, Sirius would fill in every now and then, but he was getting his hopes up for nothing. Does he think Fabian is just going to step down because he wants him to? Regulus asked himself as he watched Sirius’ face fall at the realization he had not made the starting line-up. Again. It was painful to witness. Even more painful was Sirius’ expression of envy and betrayal when Regulus was named starting seeker. About time, brother. For once, Regulus could finally bask in the light of success.

***

November 3, 1973

Regulus expected to feel different after making the Slytherin Quidditch team. More dignified, important even. It was like experiencing a birthday or a holiday; the following day, everything was still the same. Regulus was still a lanky kid, with dark circles under his eyes, and a bad temper. Becoming starting seeker didn’t change that. Treating that following Saturday morning like any other, Regulus found himself in the library alone. Most students preferred to sleep in on Saturdays, but not Regulus. He still yearned for that time alone, even if he was in better spirits than he’d ever been before. 

He took up his usual seat by the window and threw himself into his astronomy charts. Each week was spent memorizing the stars in various constellations. That week the second years were assigned Leo. Regulus knew Leo to be his constellation; the Blacks had been instilled with an abundance of astronomy knowledge before coming to Hogwarts. He wasn’t surprised when he opened the text to find his name staring back up at him, but apparently this was exciting news for his classmates.

“Regulus, you’re a star ,” Evan had teased. 

He remained humble, but deep down Regulus was quite proud of the recognition. Even if nobody made a comment about his namesake, everyone would be forced to associate him with a literal star. It felt nice to be thought of that way. 

Deep in his studies, Regulus didn’t notice right away when somebody sat down across from him. Maybe in his subconscious he believed it to be Pandora or Robin, as they often showed up at some point. So Regulus ignored the person as they pulled out their books and began their own work. But then that person coughed, a deep throaty cough that did not belong to a girl.

Regulus looked up to find himself face to face with Remus Lupin.

“What are you doing here?” the question came out a bit more harsh than intended.

“I mean, I can just leave,” Lupin started to close his books.

“No, no, it’s okay!” Regulus put his hand out, to keep Lupin from losing his place in his DADA text, “I didn’t mean to say it like that.”

“Okay…” Lupin opened his book up, looking at Regulus quizzically.

Regulus averted his eyes back to his work, but he had completely lost his train of thought. The last time Regulus and Remus had spoken was on the train home last Spring and Remus had left him with some cryptic message regarding the nature of violence. What thirteen year old talks like that? Regulus had to force himself to keep his eyes down. They both continued their work in silence for a few moments until Lupin interrupted.

“You mixed up Algieba and Adhafera.”

Regulus scoffed, “I think I know my own constellation, thanks.”

Lupin tapped his finger where Algieba was labeled, “I keep them straight by going alphabetically. Adhafera is above Algieba because d comes before l. ”

“That’s ridiculous,” Regulus scanned his textbook to compare.

Sure enough, Lupin was right.

“ That’s how you remember stuff? We just repeat the information over and over again until it sticks.”

Remus leaned back in his chair, looking a little too proud of himself, “sometimes you just need a little trick to keep it all straight.”

Regulus looked up at the older boy curiously, as he tried to decide whether or not Lupin’s advice was worth taking. He couldn’t help but wonder if Lupin’s presence was just a part of some grand plan to tank Regulus’ grades as a prank. Though Lupin hadn’t led him astray with his star chart. Maybe that was just his way of earning my trust.  

“It’s a Saturday morning and you’re here in the library, where the majority of the tables are empty. Why sit with me?” Regulus asked the question a bit lighter than he had before.

The smugness left Remus’ face and he hunched over the desk. Coming into the morning light, the little white scars across his face seemed to shimmer. Once again, Regulus was reminded of Remus’ warning and couldn’t help but wonder how he had gotten his scars. He wouldn’t dare ask.

“You may have noticed a little first year girl in Slytherin who resembles me a bit?”

Regulus had been physically present for the sorting, but not mentally. Since then, he’d seen the first years running about, but hadn’t paid them much mind. Regulus tried hard to picture the group of ten who sat at the far end of the dining table. Perhaps there was one who resembled Lupin, just without the scars of course.

Regulus shrugged, “maybe.”

“Well that would be my sister, Romilda. She has a hard time making friends and has some anger issues,” Remus chuckled lightly, “I was wondering if maybe you could ask Robin or Pandora to reach out?”

“Sure,” Regulus had no issue with this, though he was quite surprised to find that not only did Remus have a sister, but also that she was placed in Slytherin. 

“Maybe just Pandora. I think Mulciber and my sister are a little too similar. The last thing I need is a howler from my father about how Romilda is beating up all the other first years because Robin taught her how to punch.”

Regulus huffed out a laugh, though the idea that all Robin had to offer was punching lessons immediately annoyed him. 

“I’ll see what I can do,” Regulus returned to his star charts.

A few minutes passed and Remus coughed again.

"Do you plan on seeing Sirius today?"

"I suppose," Regulus kept his head down.

"Well, you know he really went above and beyond for your birthday last year-"

"He turned us all into grannies."

Remus laughed, "that was Pete's idea actually. I know he wasn't around much over the holiday and I haven't seen you two speak all term and he's worried sick about you-"

Regulus' head snapped up, "why?"

“He won’t tell me what happened at the Malfoy’s-”

“Good. He shouldn’t. He can’t .”

Remus waved his hand, “I don’t care about what happened. I care about how it’s affected him. He’s different . Even though he won’t tell us what happened, he’s worried about what it’s done to you.”

“I’m fine,” the words were a reflex. 

“Can you tell him that?” Remus’ brown eyes were soft and pleading; an odd but endearing contrast to the violent painting splattered across his skin.

“Fine.”

Lupin grinned, “good.”

Regulus half expected the older boy to pack up his books and leave; his “mission” now complete. Instead, Lupin continued to surprise Regulus and stayed. For over an hour actually. His presence was oddly comforting. Regulus didn’t really want to work out what that meant, but rather just focus on his work. Only when Robin arrived did Remus excuse himself, using Sirius’ birthday as an excuse. 

“I saw him coming on my way up. I wanted to wait until he decided to leave, but he was taking forever ,” Robin threw her bag over the back of the chair Remus had just been sitting in.

“You saw him coming?”

Robin nodded, “yeah, it was actually a bit odd. Normally my vissions aren’t so simple? All I saw was him choosing to sit with you and then I heard Sirius’ name a few times.”

“Oh,” jealousy crept into Regulus’ heart. Robin hadn’t anything to do with him, but rather her betrothed.  

“What did he want, anyway?”

Regulus spoke casually, twirling his quill between his fingers, “he’d like you to teach his sister Romilda how to knock someone out.”

***

Unsure of how to get Sirius’ attention without causing a scene, Regulus asked Pandora to show him how to send paper birds. The charm was easy. Folding the paper, not so much. Pandora opted for owls, but no matter how many times Regulus tried, it turned out horribly un-owl like. Eventually, he managed a dove/pigeon combination which Pandora obviously mourned, though she remained painfully optimistic. The hints of green in her hair crept up with each uneven fold of the paper. Sure, his bird looked like it had gotten struck by lightning, but it did the job. Sirius was waiting for Regulus at the bottom of the grand staircase a bit before dinner, as requested.

“Reggie!” Sirius wore a full grin, as he came running down the stairs at full speed.

“S,” Regulus nodded, his body stiffening, “happy birthday.”

“Thanks,” Sirius wrapped Regulus in a tight hug which was not easily reciprocated. 

The halls were not yet crowded with students heading towards the Great Hall with growling stomachs and the need to socialize, which was good news for Regulus, but he had to act fast. The brothers began their walk around the corridors of the quad perimeter. Though they were silent, Regulus could feel the giddy excitement radiating off of Sirius. His energy was overwhelming and even a bit nauseating. Regulus didn’t want to kill his brother’s spirit, but they had to talk about what happened. There was no use avoiding it anymore and if Lupin was really so worried about Sirius, then Regulus supposed it had to be important.

“So… how are you doing?” Regulus kicked along a small rock with the toe of his boot, suddenly very interesting the ground.

“Classes are rubbish, quidditch is even more rubbish, but I got my mates and I got you. What more could a bloke ask for?” Sirius spoke with enthusiasm, but there was a hint of pain in his tone that only Regulus could recognize.

“But how are you doing ?” The question felt forced and ingenuine on his tongue. 

Sirius cleared his throat, “just doing the best I can, little brother.”

“We have to talk about it.”

“We really don’t.”

“What we saw… was horrifying. But it had to happen, right? It’s not like we would have to do anything like that. And we can’t stop it from happening-”

“Says who?”

Regulus scoffed at his brother, “I’m just saying, that the Dark Lord is going to do what he wants and maybe there’s some merit to that, I don’t know. The Ministry has gone to shite and there needs to be some order. Not that I entirely agree with the methods, but I understand wanting to change things.”

Regulus was simply regurgitating everything he had heard Narcissa say over the past few months. Whether he truly believed her or not was another matter; a matter he was not getting into at that moment.

“You think killing innocent people will change things?” anger rose in Sirius’ voice.

“I think it’s a scare tactic. And like I said, I don’t agree with the methods.”

“It’s just another dead mudblood ,” Sirius spat, then more quietly to himself, “not like you care.”

“You’re right, Sirius. I don’t care. We’re kids, we can’t do anything about it. Yeah, it was horrible to witness and I’ll probably have nightmares about it for the rest of my life, but maybe Professor Wright had it coming. Maybe he was in the wrong place at the wrong time, or he said something stupid, or he instigated the whole situation! He is just another dead mudblood , who cares?”

Regulus realized he’d been shouting and looked about to see if anyone had heard him. Thankfully, the quad and the corridors were empty of students. He continued walking, though he didn’t make it very far when he realized Sirius had stopped. Turning to face his brother, he found Sirius looking absolutely dumbstruct and perhaps a little betrayed.

“You don’t mean that, Reg,” there was clear pain in his gray eyes; a look Regulus knew all too well. 

Regulus rolled his eyes, “I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“I thought you’d agree with me, at least. For months, all I could think about was how broken you must feel. I knew how I felt, so I couldn’t imagine what you were going through. But here you are, completely fine and turning a blind eye to all of it. How can you witness that and not be completely disgusted? How can you not hate him?”

Regulus put his palms to his eyes, the stress of the conversation pulsing on his head. Sirius really wasn’t grasping the severity of the situation. If they didn’t comply, or “turn a blind eye,” then they’d end up very much like Professor Wright. Voldemort had too much power to fight back. Again, Regulus asked himself, what could we possibly do to stop him?

“Sirius, there are so many layers to this. Maybe you should talk to Cissy-”

“No! I don’t want to talk to Cissy, I wanted to talk to you . Can’t you see how wrong all this is? If enough people defy him, then these terrible things will stop happening.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“It is that simple. What happened to you, Reg? You’ve always been so good. Better than me, always, but why can’t you see what’s happening?”

Regulus shook his head and turned to keep walking. He wasn’t as good as Sirius said. Certainly, he was no better than Sirius. There was a darkness inside him that kept him closed off and numb, that threatened to lash out at any given time. Sure, the past few months had been easy for him, enjoyable even, but he always felt it lurking. Regulus didn’t get into the kind of trouble Sirius did, but at least Sirius had a spine. At least Sirius actually felt empathy. 

“You’re better than this, Reggie,” Sirius was walking in stride with him, “you’re a good person.”

Regulus just shook his head.

“You are. You’re a good person who-who bad things have just happened to. Just like me.”

“I’m nothing like you, Sirius.”

Sirius huffed out a great sigh, “yeah, I’m starting to realize that.”

“Look, I’m sorry I ever even brought this up! When Lupin came to me and said you weren’t doing so well-”

“Remus? Remus came to see you ?”

Offended by the implication that Lupin would never dare speak to Regulus on his own accord, the younger boy was immediately agitated. 

“Yeah, S. He was really worried and thought I could help. Clearly he was wrong.”

Blush rose in Sirius’ cheeks, “what did he say?”

Regulus softened his tone as he turned to face Sirius, “that you’re different… since it all happened. But we’re all different now, aren’t we?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, I suppose we are,” Sirius sniffled slightly and pulled his robes around himself like a blanket.

It was quite cold out, as the sun had long been set and Winter was beginning to arrive. Regulus welcomed it, though. He embarrassed the cold in his light knit sweater, which allowed the breeze to flow through it easily. At the sight of Sirius holding himself and clearly distressed, though he was trying to mask it, Regulus stood a bit taller. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and watched Siriously closely as neither of them made a move to continue on their walk. 

Regulus was reminded of the night before Sirius left for Hogwarts. How he cried at the sight of Sirius acting out in his own little ways and how he’d miss his big brother dearly. Now, Regulus stood quite a bit taller than Sirius and he wasn’t the one crying. What had happened to him? Was it Walburga who’d caused him to become calloused? Most likely. Or maybe it was Narcissa and her warnings to play by the rules that kept Regulus from siding with his brother. It could have even been his desire to protect Robin and Pandora, though he hadn’t realized it yet. Sirius could handle himself, Regulus knew that. They had no reason to look out for each other; clearly they both had their minds made up about the situation and there’d be no changing that. 

Soon, the other students started to emerge from their common rooms and study groups, or wherever else they had been scattered around the castle. As they began to fill the quad corridor, Regulus made a quick exit to join in the parade towards supper. Leaving Sirius to his tears, Regulus mumbled a quick, “happy birthday, brother,” before blending into the sea of students.

***

December 21, 1973

“You need to make sure your thumb is on the outside of your fist, otherwise you’ll break it,” Robin explained as she delicately maneuvered little Lupin’s fingers.

Regulus snickered as he watched Romlida Lupin eagerly take instruction from her punching master. For the past hour, Robin had been giving the first year plenty of notes and had Evan stand in as a personal punching bag. He took the job willingly at first, but quickly began to regret his decision.

“I’ve been practicing dueling all week! Barty has kicked my arse enough, I really don’t need to be taking it from a little girl, too.”

Romilda punched him in the stomach and he doubled over with a groan. The two girls gave each other a small high-five while keeping their eyes locked on Rosier. Regulus knew Evan was playing it up for little Lupin, allowing her to bask in her own personal strength. The girl had spunk and a temper worse than Regulus, but she was a tiny thing. Smaller than both Pandora and Robin had been when Regulus first met them.

“I really don’t think this is good for her,” Pandora whispered over Regulus’ shoulder.

“Yeah Remus didn’t think so either, that’s why he asked for you,” Regulus smirked as Pandora’s hair shone bright red. 

“ Regulus Black ,” she hissed, “why on Earth would you do such a thing?”

He shrugged, “thought it would be funny.”

With that, Romilda hit Evan again and Regulus let out a snort.

“ See , that was funny.”

“Hardly,” Pandora walked around the sofa and delicately smoothed out her skirt as she sat beside Regulus.

It was the last day at Hogwarts before the Winter holiday and spirits were… strange. There was a mix of uneasiness and distress among those who had been at the Malfoy’s, but Christmas came with a feeling of hope and new beginnings that just couldn’t be ignored. Many were expected to go home, but Regulus and his friends were staying at Hogwarts. All had sent letters home asking for permission. All except Regulus. He had not heard from his parents at all since starting the Fall term and he was fairly certain Sirius had not received any birthday gifts or cards. He decided to wait until the very last possible moment to send an owl home, stating he’d not be returning. 

He and Sirius had spoken a few times since his brother’s birthday. Mostly because Regulus felt guilty. Sirius was still his brother, and there was no reason to cut him off completely. Remus would drag his gang of marauders to the library every Saturday morning, per Regulus’ request, as a means to remain civil. Potter encouraged the idea, though Peter remained so obviously nervous around the Slytherins. It wasn’t long before Peter had convinced James to stay behind with him and only allow Remus and Sirius to converse with their house rivals. It was difficult at first, and painfully awkward, but Remus helped ease the tension. Sirius did almost everything Remus told him to do and took his advice to heart. Watching the boys interact was baffling to Regulus; Sirius never listened to anyone but himself. Clearly, Remus held some influence over Sirius that no one had ever been able to master previously.  

The marauders had all decided to stay at Hogwarts for the break as well. As far as Regulus could tell, their two friend groups were among the very small group of students not going home. On the list posted outside the Great Hall of those staying included Romilda, Jacob Goldstein, the Ashe twins, Olivia Green, Xeno Lovegood, and Bertha Jorkins. Quite the group, to say the least. At least Michael and Snape wouldn’t be around, surely that would allow for a more peaceful holiday. 

“What are we going to do for a whole month?” Pandora asked the group wistfully.

“Sleep.”

“ Not get beaten up every day.”

“Beat Evan up every day.”

“Finally fly with the thestrals.”

All eyes turned to Robin.

“What?” she stared back blankly at her friends.

“You’re going to fly with the threstrals ?” Barty clarified.

“Yeah, you can ride them once you’ve earned their trust. Hagrid says I’m ready.”

“Those things give me the creeps,” Evan dramatically shivered.

“I think they’re just lovely,” Pandora leaned on Regulus’ shoulder, sending a shiver down his spine, “oh, Robin, won’t you take me to meet them?”

Robin turned her attention back to Romilda, her face stern and turning red, “sure.”

Pandora gushed, “yes! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I’ve been waiting ages for you to take me. Won’t you come with us, Regulus?”

“Yeah, sure,” he cleared his throat, trying to ignore the tickle of Pandora’s hair on his neck.

“What are thestrals?” Romilda asked, “can I come, too?”

The older Slytherins all stared at their adopted first year, unsure of how to delicately explain to her what the creatures were and how they were all able to see them, yet she was not.

“Well, I suppose you can come, but you won’t be able to see them,” Robin nervously pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose.

“What do you mean?” Romilda crossed her arms, giving Robin a calculated glare that reminded Regulus all too much of her older brother.

“You can’t see thestrals unless you’ve seen and understood death ,” Crouch spoke coolly from the other side of the common room, without lifting his eyes from the book he’d been pouring over. 

“Oh,” little Lupin took a moment to ponder this. Regulus watched as the gears turned in her head, realizing all of them had seen the thestrals and consequently had seen death.

“ Oh ,” she said again, her eyes growing large, “well, that’s okay. You all go and I’ll find Remus.”

She tried to keep her voice steady, but it was obvious that the implication that they had all witnessed something terrible, frightened her deeply. 

“Oh, I’m not going,” Evan argued.

“Of course you are,” Regulus got up quickly, causing Pandora to fall over slightly, “we should go right now actually.”

***

Meeting the thestrals actually went fairly well, though Robin had been a bit perturbed about sharing her and Regulus’ secret with everyone else. Hagrid was thrilled to see so many young faces arrive at his hut that evening. The half-giants enthusiasm and love of creatures was endearing, Regulus had to admit. The groundskeeper had really grown on him. When Barty began to ridicule and mock Hagrid, Regulus was half tempted to hex his friend right there on the dirt path into the forest. 

“He’s quite entertaining, isn’t he? Great big oaf handling so many little creatures. It’s a bit silly, I’ll admit.”

Hagrid was far up ahead, leading the group, so he hadn’t heard the insults. But Regulus had.

“Shut up, Crouch. Hagrid’s pretty much an expert and knows far more than you ever will about creatures and herbology.”

“Yes, Black, because I want to bother myself with becoming an expert in either of those sissy fields. There are more practical and important types of magic to master.”

“You better hope you never meet a hippogriff, with the way you talk, Crouch. It’ll peck your eyes out before you can blink,” Pandora announced that fact in the same manner one may describe a beautiful garden. 

Regulus couldn’t help but laugh at the way Pandora always left Barty speechless.

As expected, Evan and Barty didn’t care for the thestrals and the thestrals knew it. They kept their distance from one another, as the two Slytherin boys nervously watched the creatures pace across the clearing. What surprised Regulus most was how dirty Pandora could get. She had no trouble handling the raw meat which she eagerly fed the winged horses. Though it was almost below freezing out, the band of Slytherins were warm with excitement and comradery. It was a much welcomed change in tone and Regulus wished they’d all made the journey sooner. The whole interaction was bittersweet, much like it had been when Robin first took Regulus out there. Very few wizards even had the opportunity to see a thestral, and those who did often stayed far away.

As the small group of second years headed back towards the castle, bundled in their thick winter robes and house scarves, Regulus thought that maybe there was a silver lining to all they’d endured over the past year. Of course their lives wouldn’t be all sunshine and rainbows (nobody’s life was), but through everything they’d dealt with, they had each other. Regulus couldn’t help the cliche, but it was true. He had his friends, he had Sirius, and he had the miraculous opportunity to care for the thestrals. That’s all that mattered to him and he’d do anything to keep things the way they were.

Anything. 

Chapter Text

December 25, 1973

On Christmas morning, Hogwarts awoke to freshly fallen slow and a parliament of owls carrying ever so many gifts for the students who stayed. It was a glorious morning of gift giving between friends in the Slytherin common room. Pandora and little Lupin had woken up before everyone to retreive hot chocolate from the kitchens; on silver platters they carried in the steaming mugs and were grinning ear to ear at the success of their task.

Regulus’ stack of presents was much smaller than the others, but this was to be expected and didn’t bother him much. All but one of the packages were from his friends; that one was from Andromeda. Andy had never sent Regulus anything before, for fear of it being confiscated. Regulus knew the lack of mail was never his own fault, but it was curious to see her return address on the brown paper parcel. He hadn’t seen or heard from here since his eleventh birthday. 

His breath hitched as he examined the package; it was small and lightweight, most likely a book. Delicately, Regulus untied the thick yarn and peeled back the rough paper which wrapped his already most cherished Christmas gift. Four hundred sixteen pages were nestled in a glossy blue jacket. On the front, a golden stallion posed with a fair skinned princess perched upon a jeweled saddle. 

“ The Princess Bride, ” Evan read from over his shoulder, “who sent you that girly fairytale?”

Regulus’ cheeks burned violently, as he hid the cover against his chest. 

“Someone sent you a fairytale?” Pandora perked up, turning her attention away from the paddle ball she’d been wielding for the past ten minutes.

“It’s from Andromeda.”

Pandora knew well enough to leave talk of Regulus’ family alone.

Not Barty, “your blood traitor cousin?”

“Is it a muggle book?” Robin peered over her glasses, trying to get a look at the book still clutched to Regulus’ chest.

“Maybe, I don’t know. I’ve never heard of it,” Regulus mumbled.

With that, Romilda trotted over, “I can tell you for sure,” she snatched up The Princess Bride with impeccable speed. 

“Oi!” Regulus protested, scrambling to his feet.

Romilda turned the book over in her hands, “first of all, the pictures don’t move. Also, William Goldman does sound particularly muggle.”

“Your blood traitor cousin sent you a muggle book?” Barty snorted.

“A muggle fairytale ,” Evan chimed in. 

Regulus didn’t care if it was a muggle book, or even a girl book. Andromeda got it for him . That meant more than anything. He took the book back from Romilda, stashing it away with the rest of his gift. On the floor, where the package once sat, there was a small red envelope Regulus had missed.

His face dropped.

“Oh no ,” he said with a whisper.

All the giggling and chatter ceased as Regulus raised the howler, his hand shaking just slightly.

“You have to open it, Black, or it’ll just get worse,” Robin warned.

“I know how it works,” Regulus snapped, “I’ve seen Sirius receive these often enough.”

As his finger slid under the wax seal, the envelope unraveled itself and the voice of Walburga Black came screeching out of it. 

“Regulus Arcturus Black, never in my life did I believe I’d have to do this! You stood up your own blood on the greatest of holidays and made your father and I out to be fools at the gala. I would have sent this sooner when you were nowhere to be found on the platform, but I was sure you’d find your way home. Your lack of attendance at the gala was sorely noticed by the Dark Lord. We are all deeply concerned with where your head is, boy. Do keep in mind what’s important. Don’t bother writing home before the end of term.”

The howler tore itself to shreds and the pieces floated down to the floor like the snow outside. 

“Well that was miserable,” Evan broke the horrible silence.

Pandora placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder, “are you okay, Reg-”

“I’m fine,” he shook her off and got to his feet.

All eyes were on Regulus as he took his gift from Andy and fled the common room. 

He wasn’t exactly sure where to go, but he had to escape the humiliation. Still in his pajamas, Regulus roamed the deserted halls. Those trapped in the portraits, now adorned with paper crowns, stared down at him. Hauntingly festive , was the phrase the young Slytherins gave to them. Anger, resentment, and embarrassment burned within Regulus as he paced; his slippers lightly scuffing the stone floors and echoing through the corridors. He turned Andy’s gift over in his hands, unsure what to make of the random gesture. Regulus wondered if Sirius had gotten something, too. Perhaps it was Sirius who wrote to Andy, informing her that Regulus would be at Hogwarts and thus able to receive something from her. 

It was always Sirius. 

As much as Regulus loved Andromeda and was grateful for her thinking of him, he hated that it came with the price of being ridiculed. Surely, the howler had hammered the nail in the coffin, but maybe Regulus would have been more prepared to take it if he had seen it coming sooner and had not been previously made fun of for a supposed girly, muggle book from his blood traitor cousin. Surely, Sirius was behind it. 

Regulus found himself turning the pages of The Princess Bride , and was instantly enthralled. 

What are we going to do about Billy? That was the phrase that haunted me those first ten years. I pretended not to care, but secretly I was petrified. Everyone and everything was passing me by. I had no real friends, no single person who shared an equal interest in all games. I seemed busy, busy, busy, but I suppose, if pressed, I might have admitted that, for all my  frenzy, I was very much alone.

Suddenly, Regulus was questioning everything. What are they - Orion and Walburga - going to do about Sirius? What are they going to do about me ? Were all of his friends truly his friends or just a convenient group of people to spend time with? Regulus was a busy child. School work and quidditch and cursed vaults and mudbloods and Voldemort . But who was really in his corner? Surely he’d always have Pandora - or was Regulus just a hopeless case, someone for her to feel bad about? He and Robin shared a complicated relationship, but when it came down to it, she’d always be better off without him. Barty and Evan had each other and no need for Regulus, that had always been obvious. Even Sirius, his own brother, had friends of his own and shared nothing in common with Regulus aside from his blood.

Regulus was very much alone.

He continued reading.

The book was ridiculous and absolutely splendid. Regulus loved it. As he walked, he flew through the pages, and found himself walking beside those named in ink. He wasn’t at Hogwarts anymore, but in Florin. It was a perfect escape. Regulus wished for nothing more to be pulled from his personal horrors and wake up one day riding alongside Westley or Princess Buttercup. Some of the language was a little confusing, perhaps all muggle things, but that didn’t bother Regulus. 

As he rounded a corner, nose buried in newly bound pages, Regulus collided into something and found himself sprawled out on his back. Rather than something , there were several someone's standing in front of him. Staring back at him in shock and annoyance were Duncan Ashe, Jacob Goldstein, and Olivia Green. Regulus expected some kind of snarky remark from the older students, but the look of contempt on Jacob’s face vanished at the realization of who he had bumped into. Anyone who associated themselves with the likes of Snape and Mulciber, or even Malfoy, were severely avoided. That fact combined with the Black name, was more than enough to keep Goldstein and his friends far away from Regulus.

The trio was covered in dust and what appeared to be a thick layer of ice clung to the bottom half of their winter robes. Olivia’s curly brown hair was frozen in place, with little crystals of ice sprinkled throughout. Her nose and lips were blue with cold, as were the other boys. They easily could have been playing out in the freshly fallen Christmas snow, but that didn’t explain the dust. Of course, Regulus had some inkling of what they had been doing. He recalled the conversation overheard in the library; something about an ice vault. They certainly look like they’ve seen some ice. But Regulus was smarter than that, he couldn’t just outright ask where they’d been.

“You going to get off the floor or not, Black?” Jacob’s teeth chattered.

Oh, right.

Regulus scrambled to his feet, gathering his book from the floor. He wasn’t the only one with a book. Jacob’s stark white hands clasped around a brown leather bound book, his fingertips faded from purple as warmth returned to them. Jacob caught Regulus’ stare, quickly forcing the book into his robes. If he was trying to hide the importance of the book, perhaps he shouldn’t have drawn so much attention to it. 

“Happy Christmas, then,” Regulus gave the trio a tight lipped smile and strolled confidently past them.

Clearly, the older students had found something; whether it was the vault itself or a clue to it, Regulus wasn’t sure. As he hurried back to the common room, a plan began to form. Regulus was determined to get to the bottom of this vault business and he knew just how to get there.

***

“Regulus, I am not doing that,” Pandora repeated for about the tenth time.

“Come on, Dora! There’s supposed to be gold and all kinds of treasure, don’t you want to get to it first?”

“Not if I have to pretend to be Olivia! I can only keep up a full appearance for a few minutes.”

“That’s all we need, you just need a look at Goldstein’s book. The second he saw me looking at it, he hid it away. That proves it’s important.”

“I don’t know…” Pandora nervously twirled her fading green hair between her fingers.

“Even if he’s not in his dorm, there’s gotta be some kind of clue.”

“What if Olivia is there?”

Regulus shrugged, “then change into Snape.”

“Snape isn’t here, though! Won’t that be suspicious?”

“I’m sure you can make something up, you’re a smart witch.”

Pandora blushed, “fine, I’ll do it.”

“Oh, you’re the best!” Regulus gave Pandora a quick embrace and the witch blushed deeper.

“Fifteen minutes, okay? I’m not spending a second more in there.”

 “Whatever you need to do,” Regulus nodded encouragingly.

With that Pandora was out the door. Fifteen minutes had never felt so long. In the time Regulus awaited Pandora’s return, he sat anxiously at his desk, his leg bouncing with anticipation. Every few seconds he checked the time, as if he could make it go by any faster. After a few moments the door opened, Regulus jumped up eagerly, but it was Robin who came through. He fell back into his seat with a groan.

“Nice to see you too, Black,” Robin rolled her eyes, “have you seen Pandora?”

“She’s on a mission.”

Robin raised a brow, “a mission ?”

Regulus only nodded.

“Fine, don’t tell me, but I’m going to wait right here until she returns,” Robin took her seat at Evan’s desk.

The silence was brutally uncomfortable as time ticked by slower than ever. Robin stared directly at Regulus, as she sat in Evan’s chair, an air of arrogance around her. It was unnerving having her there. Regulus didn’t want her judgment, which would be sure to come once Pandora returned. Before Pandora could complete her fifteen minutes, Robin shot to her feet.

“We have to go,” Robin was halfway to the door before Regulus could even process what was happening.

“What did you see?” He chased after her. 

“Goldstein’s got her in a full body bind.”

“Shite.”

The two were instantly running down the hall to the third year’s dormitory. With zero hesitation, Robin flew through the door, eyes ablaze with fury. The room was practically in shambles; clothes, books, potions, and other various magical items were scattered about. Dark sheets were tacked up over the windows, allowing no light from the lake to penetrate. A few candles and the lit fireplace created a haunting orange glow in the otherwise pitch black room. At its center, Ashe and Goldstein were both standing over Pandora, wands drawn. It was a scene that would live in Regulus’ mind for the rest of his days; something he’d never be able to take back.

“ Flipendo !” Robin sent both boys across the room with frightening force.

Her jinx broke the full body bind on Pandora, allowing her to crawl to her feet. Clearly shaken up, Pandora was drained of all color and her hair was as black as night. Never had she looked so absolutely broken. Robin was approaching the other boys at full stride, ready for another jinx or curse. Even Regulus was a bit nervous about what she’d do next, but certainly wouldn’t get in her way.

“Robin, don’t! They’re not worth it,” Pandora pleaded.

“They can’t get away with this, Dora!”

“Whatever you do to them, will come back to us. I can’t be here.”

Even if the boy’s curse earned them a detention, Pandora would have to explain why she was there in the first place. It wasn’t worth the risk. Torn between logic and revenge, Robin wavered uneasily, her eyes never leaving where Ashe and Goldstein had landed.

“Come on, Robin, we have to go,” Regulus had gathered Pandora in his arms, eager to leave the whole mess behind.

With a groan, Robin marched right out the door, clearly enraged. 

“We should help them,” Pandora spoke so sweetly, it broke Regulus’ heart. 

“We have to go, Dora,” he tightened his hold around her shoulders, leading her back to his dorm. 

There they found Robin pacing, twirling her hand anxiously, mumbling to herself.

“What were you thinking, Black?” She rushed at him, wand pointed under his chin.

“Robin,” he brought his hand up slowly, wrapping his fingers around hers, “hear us out, okay?”

She thrust her wand forward, pitching the bit of flesh above his Adam’s apple. 

“Put your wand down, Robin, he didn’t force me to do anything ,” Pandora moved from Regulus’ embrace and pushed her friend away slowly. 

“They shouldn’t have attacked you, Dora! They need to pay, I need to do something .”

“No.” Pandora spoke sternly.

“Pandora was helping me find clues for the cursed vaults, she was only there because I asked her to.”

“I wanted to help, but my abilities, I- I messed up,” tears pooled in Pandora’s eyes.

“What happened in there?” Regulus never thought Pandora would be found out.

“They believed it at first, I was the exact likeness of Olivia. Duncan and Jacob were going over the journal, but it was all in code. They mentioned something about the west corridor and an ice knight . I remembered what you said about them being covered in ice so I used that as an excuse for why I was so quiet and they believed me, I swear they did. But after a while I started fading, like I was falling asleep, and my abilities, I- I just stopped. ”

“Oh, Dora ,” Regulus’ face fell as Pandora burst into tears.

“It’s just like before,” she sobbed, “all my training was for nothing, I can’t control it anymore!”

Robin and Regulus gazed at each other uncomfortably while Pandora cried into her hands. Neither of them were very good with their own emotions, much less someone else’s. Even if it was Pandora. If she was struggling with her metamorphic abilities, Regulus wondered if they could ever truly be mastered. He didn’t want to doubt Pandora, but the way she was crying hysterically had him questioning her quite a bit. 

“Why don’t you go to McGonagall tomorrow and talk to her about it? You have the whole holiday to figure it out,” Regulus reassured, but the look he shared with Robin told him that he may have too high of hopes.

“Yeah, I-I’ll do that,” Pandora nodded, sucking in her ragged breaths.

“You alright now?” Robin asked hesitantly.

Pandora nodded, wiping away her tears.

“Why don’t you go lay down for a bit?” Regulus suggested, guiding Pandora to the door.

“You’re right. I-I’ll go do that,” Pandora sniffled.

“Good, we’ll come get you for supper.”

Once Pandora was gone, Regulus turned to Robin. Still visibly angry and rightfully so, Mulciber fumed as she paced the room. Laundry tossed on the floor was kicked aside as she mumbled hateful words about the older Slytherins. Robin’s distress, while warranted, was annoying. She was lucky to have seen Pandora in time before anything ridiculous happened. That was enough. Regulus knew how to hold a grudge, but there was nothing any of them could do. The plan would have worked, if Pandora hadn’t lost control; that was worth more concern than anything else. 

“Shouldn’t you be on your way to curse them, Black?” Robin shouted, breaking Regulus’ train of thought. 

He scoffed, “what do you want me to do? We can’t go after them or we’ll get in trouble. They can’t do anything to us, because they have to protect their secrets about the vaults. I don’t know about you, but I’m trying not to get expelled.”

“What is all this business about vaults?” Robin had her hands on her hips and the glare she gave Regulus through her glasses could have set him on fire.

“Remember how I overheard Ashe and Goldstein in the library talking about these cursed vaults, last month?” Robin nodded slowly, “I ran into them this morning and they were covered in ice and dust and Goldstein was hiding this book. Pandora went to investigate, but only because I asked her to.”

Regulus was suddenly very very ashamed. It was stupid of him to let Pandora do that on her own. He’d barely seen her use her abilities in weeks and just assumed she’d be able to take on Olivia’s likeness perfectly. They could have come up with a better plan. He should have given her more time. 

“You’re an idiot, Black.”

Regulus hung his head. He was though, wasn’t he? Running off because he was embarrassed and jumping to conclusions and acting out. What kind of intelligent person does that ? There was nothing he could do to take it back, to make things different. Now, he’d have to live with the knowledge that he forced Pandora to do something she wasn’t comfortable with and it would haunt him forever.

Robin placed a hand on his shoulder, “you’re an idiot for not including the rest of us.”

Regulus looked up through his growing curls, to find Robin smiling at him. Not a gleeful and cheery smile. No. This was sinister? A smile that suggested revenge and destruction. 

“Next time, we’ll have a better plan for getting to the vaults and dealing with Goldstein and his friends.”

Regulus believed her wholeheartedly.

***

Christmas dinner was as delightful as it could possibly be, given the circumstances. Regulus and his friends sat at the head of the Gryffindor table with little Lupin and the Marauders. Bertha and Xeno were seated with Goldstein and his friends, at the head of the Ravenclaw table. Seated at opposite ends of the Great Hall and with a strong sense of disdain in the air, the professors sat above them and looked nervously back and forth at the students who remained for the holiday. The professors weren’t stupid, they knew something had happened. Before long, they’d surely find out. Regulus didn’t doubt that for a second.

A fire blazed in the grand fireplace next to the Gryffindor table, snow fell delicately from the enchanted ceiling, and the banisters were decorated with garland and mistletoe. It was a beautiful scene for those fortunate enough to behold it. For a good thirty minutes, Potter went on and on about how much he missed Evans. He finally shut up when Rosier reminded him that she and Snape were likely spending every second on the holiday together. The Gryffindor's face turned as red as his sweater, but he didn’t mention the mudblood’s name again for the rest of the night.

When supper appeared the students were slow to feast. Barty, Evan, and little Lupin dug right in. Still a bit unsettled from the day’s events, Regulus, Robin, and Pandora had little stomach for Yorkshire pudding and mince pies. Across the table, Sirius, Potter, and Pettigrew shifted uneasily in their seats. They looked at the food with big eyes, but did not touch it. Sirius made the mistake of meeting Regulus’ curious stare. One look told Regulus that his brother was hiding something. His eyes were guilty. Regulus could always tell when Sirius was hiding something. Next to Sirius, Remus dug into the feast with little to no shame. So whatever was going on with the other three, did not apply to Lupin. Lupin didn’t even seem to notice his friends’ strange behavior. 

“Here, S, have some stuffing and gravy, I know it’s your favorite,” Regulus passed his brother a plate.

Panic took over and Sirius pushed the plate away. His mouth twisted and his tongue poked his left cheek.

“I’m alright,” Sirius attempted a smile.

Regulus then realized that the other boys were also struggling to keep their mouths still. They seemed to already be chewing on something. A prank from Zonko’s, some kind of bubblegum from Honeydukes? Whatever it was, none of them seemed to enjoy it much.

“Oh, come on Sirius, have a bit,” Lupin smirked and pushed the plate back towards him, winking at Regulus in the process.

So Lupin was aware of whatever was going on and wanted to annoy Sirius just as much as Regulus did. Regulus knew he liked this kid. 

“I think I need to go to bed,” Pettigrew, green in the face, was clutching his round stomach, “I don’t feel very good.”

James looked just as sick, but didn’t follow. He and Sirius ended up picking at some bread, both eating it slowly with careful consideration. Remus continued to feast while chuckling to himself. From her place at the head table, McGonagall peered at them suspiciously over her half moon glasses. If McGonagall suspected something, then there had to be mischief afoot. Regulus wanted nothing more than to know what his brother was up to.  If Lupin wasn’t a part of the shenanigans, then it had to be something truly idiotic. 

Supper came and went, ending the Christmas holiday with little extravagance. With Karasi by his side, Regulus crawled into bed more reassured than he had been all day. He always overreacted. Tomorrow he’d wake up to a fresh start and all would be well. He and his friends would hash out a solid plan to investigate the cursed vaults, Pandora would work on her metamorphmagus abilities, they’d all feed some thestrals, and Regulus would get to the bottom of whatever Sirius was up to. They still had a few weeks with the castle to themselves and Regulus silently vowed to make the best of it. Come the Spring term, he’d put all his insecurities behind and focus on the Quidditch Cup and beating Crouch in getting top marks. Regulus didn’t dare think about the Summer. He’d rather just ignore the inevitable. What use was it worrying about what he couldn’t control? At least at Hogwarts he had the ability to do what he wanted without fear. That Christmas evening, Regulus fell asleep reading The Princess Bride and dreamt of beautiful, faraway lands. 

Chapter Text

December 26, 1973

Robin had successfully turned the boy’s dormitory into a war room in just a matter of hours. The boy’s desks had all been moved to the center of the room to form a larger table, where a ginormous map of the castle was spread flat. Wizard’s chess pieces were placed about in various spots of suspicion and concern; the little stone men wordlessly shouted at each other with their swords raised and horses neighing. Robin stood at the head of the table. Her hair was braided into a bun atop her head with loose strands hanging over her glasses. Not being able to see his friend’s eyes wasn’t an issue for Regulus, he already knew how dark and calculating they were.

After discovering what had happened to Pandora, Barty and Evan were fully on board with getting back at Ashe and Goldstein. Regulus had to continuously remind them that the plan was to get to the vaults before them, not to kill their opponents. The other boys just shrugged him off. While Robin walked them through her plan, moving the chess pieces about the map with the tip of her wand, Regulus sat back with his arms crossed and a scowl across his face.

“Any questions?” Robin asked proudly.

“Yeah, when do we get to the vaults?” Regulus narrowed his brows, knowingly testing Robin.

Her nostrils flared, “ after we scare Goldstein and Ashe into giving up on finding them.”

“Fat chance at that,” Regulus scoffed, “we can’t really do anything without them retaliating and I can’t get in trouble. You’re relying on Pandora’s metamorphic abilities and your visions. Both of those things aren’t exactly reliable. And you expect these two,” he pointed at Barty and Evan, “to be stealthy ? Please, be realistic here, Robin.”

“They’re the best duelers we know!”

“We can’t get caught dueling!”

Regulus and Robin were both standing with their palms pressed flat against the desks. Their eyes locked and Regulus knew he got her. Robin was boiling with anger. 

“We need to find a way, a safe and inconspicuous way, to get to the vaults before them. We need to intercept without them suspecting a thing. I tried that with Pandora and we saw how well that worked. So instead let’s use her connection to the Ravenclaws.”

Regulus sat back down, trying not to let his smugness show.

“What do the Ravenclaws have to do with the vaults?” Rosier asked.

“Olivia Green. She’s in on the vaults and we can use that to our advantage. Pandora is close with Xeno, who also happens to be here on holiday. I happen to know for a fact that Bertha, Xeno and Olivia Green are thick as thieves. If the rest of you haven’t noticed, Bertha Jorkins can’t keep her trap shut to save her life. All Pandora has to do is go to them, as herself , and find out as much as she can as casually as she can.”

“Do you really think Dora will agree to that, Black? She’s not even here and you’re deciding things for her!”

“At least Dora is interested in finding the vaults and not getting revenge!”

Barty leaned in, “wait, wouldn’t Jorkins and Lovegood know about Pandora disguising herself as Olivia to get information?”

“Not a chance Ashe and Goldstein would admit to that. Olivia and Pandora are friendly and I know Duncan and Jacob don’t want to get into any trouble, just as much as I don’t.”

That seemed to satisfy Crouch.

“I don’t like this, Black,” Robin shook her head as she crossed her arms defiantly.

“And I don’t like stalking older students and planning to trap them into portraits for the foreseeable future. Do you hear how insane that sounds when I say it outloud?” 

Robin didn’t answer, only silently fumed. 

“When Dora gets back from her meeting with McGonagall, we’ll fill her in. It’s her decision. Agreed?”

Rosier and Crouch nodded their heads. 

Robin groaned, “ fine .”

A smirk formed on Regulus’ lips. He picked up a bishop placed closest to his end of the table and set it just across from the king resting beside Robin’s hand.

“Checkmate.”

The tiny stone bishop lifted his chair and smashed the king to pieces.

He hadn’t expected the destructive blow, as they weren’t truly playing the game. It seemed the pieces themselves had a sense of humor to which Regulus couldn’t help but laugh. Robin’s jaw dropped as she stared down at the pieces. It didn’t matter that the king would repair himself in a minute of two, the damage had been done. 

“I hate you, Regulus Black,” Robin spoke the words so calmly before swiftly exiting the room.

There was once a time where Robin Mulciber would cry over Regulus’ callous behavior. The witch had come to Hogwarts shy and soft, then quickly turned into a cold and opinionated young lady. At least Regulus didn’t have to feel bad about his behavior towards Robin anymore. It seemed this new heated tension between the two of them was their own way of bonding. They were more alike than either would care to admit. All the struggles and violence and strife in their lives cultivated in their quick tempers and insecurities. Regulus wondered if Robin got as much joy from pushing his buttons as he did hers. 

“You’ll be lucky she doesn’t trap you in a portrait,” Barty laughed, shaking his head.

Regulus only shrugged, “she’ll get over it.”

“She doesn’t like you shooting down her ideas, Black,” Evan chimed in, “she’s doing all she can to impress you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Regulus narrowed his eyes and tried to ignore the sudden thumping in his chest.

Crouch and Rosier exchanged a knowing look. Regulus didn’t like it one bit.

“Why would Robin want to impress me? She already knows she’s the smartest witch in our year, it’s not like I’d deny that.”

“This isn’t about top marks, Reg.” Barty rolled his eyes, “she doesn’t need you to tell her how brilliant she is.”

“Robin wants you to support this mad plan of hers because she likes you!” Rosier was grinning ear to ear.

Regulus shook his head, unwilling to accept Evan’s grand delusions. He wasn’t sure if it was panic or exhilaration causing his heart to beat faster and he tried his damndest to suppress it. 

“She just told me she hated me,” Regulus tried to laugh, but the sound came out awkward and frantic.

“Because you’re not seeing the big picture, Reg,” Evan grabbed him by the shoulders, “she’s crazy about you and you’re too stupid to see it. She hates how much she likes you.”

Regulus shoved Rosier off, “how would you know?”

Before Evan could answer, Barty shot him a look practically daring him to like the secret spill.

“We just know,” Evan sucked in his lips.

“You’re just screwing around, aren’t you? You guys just want me to make a fool out of myself for a laugh.”

Barty rolled his eyes, “we don’t need to do anything to make you look like a fool, mate, you’re capable of doing that quite well on your own.”

Regulus fumbled over his words, annoyed and confused by what the other boys were insinuating. On top of it all, the long curls in his eyes were driving him mad and he struggled to keep his temper as he fought to stay cool under such accusations. Regulus wondered how Sirius managed to stay focused with his hair twice as long as Regulus’. Was looking cool really worth the hassle? Regulus doubted it.

He gathered a bit of hair into a fist and paced as he digested the idea of Robin’s feelings for him.

“Don’t get yourself all worked up about it, Reg,” Evan snorted, “she’s just a girl.”

“She’s not even pure blood,” Barty murmured as he decapitated a chocolate frog.

Regulus whirled around, “what does that have to do with anything?”

“Is she really worth it? Not only is she betrothed to your brother, she’s still a mudblood. If I were you, I’d put a stop to any feelings towards each other right away. You’re too good for her, Black.”

Regulus was at a loss for words.

Crouch continued, “I mean, I guess you could have your fun for now, but would you really want to taint yourself? No self respecting pure blood witch would want you after being with a mudblood ,” he nibbled on the frog, “though you could manage to have your way with her without anyone knowing.”

“ Have my way with her? ” Regulus’ wand was suddenly under Barty’s chin.

Crouch stared at Regulus through his brow, seemingly unbothered by the wand pinching at his skin, “I’m just being honest. Friends look out for each other.”

“You’re Robin’s friend, too, in case you’ve forgotten,” Regulus spoke through gritted teeth.

Barty laughed lightly, “because I know how capable she is. I’m not so dumb as to ignore Robin’s strength. I’d rather have her in my corner than not at all.”

“Robin’s not exactly Barty’s biggest fan either, if you haven’t noticed,” Evan piped up, “I don’t think she’d be particularly enraged by his assertion.”

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, right?” Crouch raised a brow.

“Robin is not your enemy!”

“No, but she’s not one of us, not really.”

Regulus lowered his wind cautiously. Did Robin’s blood really matter so much? He thought. That was always something he felt like he could overlook. If the Dark Lord trusted the Mulcibers enough to include them in his plans, that should have been good enough for Crouch - for all of them! Though, maybe Crouch had a point. There were only so many pure blood families who strived to remain pure and it wasn’t Robin’s fault she was born into her family. If she ascribed to the same values as Regulus, that was all that mattered to him and maybe that’s what mattered to the dark Lord as well. 

“Robin is our friend. I trust her and so does the Dark Lord. You don’t mean to suggest the Dark Lord is wrong in who he has chosen, do you?”

The light in Barty’s eyes flickered only slightly, but Regulus caught it. The mere suggestion that he may question any of Voldemort’s decisions was enough to scare him straight.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Barty stuck his chin out.

***

“McGonagall says I need to begin private lessons with her again, but twice a week this time,” Pandora stated matter-of-factly. 

Regulus had found her doing handstands against the wall outside of the Great Hall with little Lupin. When Pandora hadn’t returned to the common room and after quite a few hours, Regulus began to worry. It seemed Romilda had as well, as the first year took it upon herself to go searching for the metamorphmagus. 

“It’s just so frustrating ,” Pandora’s face and hair turned bright red with her words.

Regulus stuffed his hands in his pockets as he leaned up against the wall beside her.

“How long have you been doing this for?”

“Twenty minutes,” Lupin announced cheerfully. 

“Is that healthy?” Regulus chuckled softly.

“I’m hoping all the blood rushing to my head will fix my problems,” Pandora grunted.

“Uh-huh. Lupin, how about you? This fixing any problems for you?”

“Nope!” Romilda kicked off from the wall and began walking around on the palms of her hands.

Aside from a slight family resemblance, Romilda Lupin was nothing like her brother. The girl was full of energy, yapping away freely and often loudly, and quite enjoyed the spotlight which Remus seemed to shy away from. Oddly enough, the first year reminded Regulus fondly of Sirius. 

With his eyes trailing Romilda, Regulus slid down the wall until he was seated on the floor and almost eye level with Pandora. Her arms were shaking slightly as she struggled to maintain her balance.

“So, I need your help.”

“I hope it doesn’t involve me turning into a duck.”

“No, nothing of the sort. See, Robin wanted to trap Ashe and Goldstein in a couple of portraits and of course I put my foot down.”

Pandora snorted, but said nothing.

“Instead, I offered a more strategic plan. We need you to speak with Olivia Green.”

“The girl I tried to impersonate?” Pandora sounded impatient.

“Yes… but you’re friends with Xeno and I know he and Olivia are pretty close. I thought maybe you could learn something from them. Or even Bagshot, for that matter. You probably wouldn’t be able to get two words in before she starts blabbing.”

Pandora blew a strand of hair out of her face, “I don’t even know what I’d say without sounding suspicious.”

“Maybe start with discussing other Hogwarts mysteries? There are plenty of hidden passageways and rooms all over the castle! I’m sure the excitement of the vaults will be too great to retain once you get them talking.”

Ever so gently, Pandora let her legs fall forward. In one swift motion, her feet were firmly on the ground and she was standing upright with her hands above her head. The color in her face slowly returned to normal. 

“I suppose that could work. What did Robin say about it?”

Regulus gulped, “she was quite upset that I didn’t support her plans of abusing Ashe and Goldstein.”

The conversation with Barty and Evan was not something Regulus wanted to share. The possibility of Robin actually having feelings for him reminded Regulus of the Valentine’s he had received the year prior. He still hadn’t concluded who wrote the notes and didn’t want Pandora to get upset over it. It would be best for everyone to just forget what Evan and Barty had divulged and move on. 

“Well I’m glad you didn’t agree with her,” Pandora stuck her hand out to help Regulus to his feet, “we don’t need anymore violence.”

Regulus had also failed to mention his almost assault on Crouch. Pandora definitely didn’t need to hear about that. 

“When would you have me speak to Olivia?”

“Whenever you feel is best,” Regulus bowed his shoulders forward just slightly. 

Pandora smiled at the gesture and turned on her heel to fetch little Lupin. The three of them returned to the dungeons to find Robin sitting alone with her sketchbook on one of the many window sills which looked out into the frigid lake. Her stare was cold when she caught sight of Regulus. She slammed her book shut and marched off to the girl’s dormitory. 

Romilda whistled softly, “she must be really mad at you.”

“Yeah, she is,” Regulus sighed.

“I think she likes you, but if I’m being honest I think you could do a lot better, Regulus.”

He stared at the girl in disbelief, his mouth slightly agape.

“Robin is so uptight and angry. I love her, I do! But she can be a total bitch.”

“ Romilda !” Pandora hissed, her face burning.

The smile melted from Romilda’s face, “sorry. That was mean.”

Regulus would have laughed if he wasn’t so stunned by little Lupin’s observation. Does everyone know Robin likes me, but me?

“I think I’m going to nap before supper.”

Regulus returned to his dorm in a haze, feeling slightly nauseous. Barty and Evan were nowhere to be found, for which he was eternally grateful. After a quick sleep, he’d be more alert and refreshed, the day’s events would be behind him. Though once he laid down, Karasi had other plans. The kitten padded back and forth across his chest, pawed at the wall above his head, and meowed tirelessly for what felt like an eternity. Wide awake and wildly uncomfortable, Regulus gave up on sleep and left the dungeons once more. 

He found himself roaming the castle aimlessly. His feet carried him all the way up to the astronomy tower, somewhere he hadn’t willingly gone to in ages, aside from class of course. The winter air bit at his cheeks and blew through his mane. It was a welcome sension and one Regulus hadn’t realized he missed. The sky was gray with the promise of another snowfall and somehow Regulus could smell what was to come. 

As he rounded the last set of stairs, Regulus was surprised to find a figure sitting at the edge of the tower, it’s back to Regulus. He had half a mind to turn around and go back to the dungeons, but he’d already made it this far. Something in his stomach pulled at him. Once a bit closer, he was surprised to find Sirius with his legs dangling over the edge of the wall. His brother’s fists were balled up tight, his wand tangled in his hair as a means to keep it in a knot atop his head. What an idiot , Regulus thought. If Sirius was ever caught in some kind of trouble, his wand would be in an awful position to protect himself.

“Hey there,” Regulus announced himself casually, though it stilled caused Sirius to jump.

“Reg, you scared me,” Sirius clutched at his chest. 

For a split second, Sirius’ eyes darted out towards the ground and a look of panic washed across his face. He quickly swung his legs back over the wall and stood steadily to great Regulus. It was impossible to miss the slight shake in Sirius’ limbs, though that could have been written off as a chill. 

“You alright, S?”

“Erm, yeah, never better,” he lied. 

“Whatcha doing up here all alone?”

Sirius twisted his mouth and struggled to form his words, “just felt like getting some fresh air.”

Regulus was content with saying nothing at all and would have even let Sirius leave the astronomy tower without a goodbye, but his brother seemed to have a different plan. With no warning at all, Sirius was on Regulus and fully sobbing. The old boy’s muscular arms were wrapped tight around Regulus’ neck and the sheer force of the embrace set Regulus slightly off balance. To say he was absolutely baffled would be a complete understatement. Regulus didn’t know what to do but let Sirius cry it out. Whatever it was. He gently patted his brother’s back and began to pry him off. Sirius was a blubbering mess. His eyes were red and puffy, his cheeks tear stained, and snot streamed down over his lips. It was all Regulus could do not to grimace in disgust. 

“I’m so sorry, Reg,” Sirius sobbed.

“Sorry for what?”

“I shouldn’t have come up here. I should have come to you sooner.”

“S, I truly have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I was going to throw myself off!” Sirius buried his face in his hands and continued to sob.

It took a moment for it to click for Regulus. The realization froze his entire body. The cold had torn right through him. It was no longer welcoming, but evil and full of pain. He saw his brother standing in front of him, yet he couldn’t rid his mind of the possible image of the boy’s body sprawled across the frozen ground below. It wasn’t real, but it felt more real than anything.

“I’m so sorry, Reg,” Sirius repeated.

Regulus blinked at his brother, fully numb and unable to really process what Sirius was almost about to do.

“It’s all so wrong! Everything going on - Professor Wright. I can’t get it out of my head! It’s all I see. All day, it’s there and I can’t get rid of it. I’m going mad , Reggie! I can’t take it anymore and I have nobody to talk to. James and Remus wouldn’t understand. I just don’t want to live with this pain, with the guilt anymore.”

“You son of a bitch, S!” Regulus shoved his brother, “what were you thinking?”

The tears came quickly, then.

“I said I was sorry!”

Regulus shoved him again, “you’re such an idiot! Why didn’t you come to me , huh?”

“I don’t know!”

“What about me, S? You were just going to leave me? Just like that?”

“I-I didn’t know what to do.”

Regulus took Sirius down hard . He didn’t really want to hurt Sirius, but he was just so angry with him.

As the brothers wrestled, Sirius inhaled sharply and began to choke. Panic surged through Regulus. He could not be the cause of Sirius’ demise after all that. He smacked Sirius on the back as hard as he could, sending Sirius into a coughing fit. Sirius covered his mouth with both his hands, his eyes wide with concern.

“What the bloody hell are you choking on, Sirius?”

The boy shook his head and twisted his mouth.

“Tell me right now, S, or I’ll make you choke on it again!” Regulus had his fist raised, ready to strike.

Sirius threw his hands up in defense, “it’s a mandrake leaf, okay?”

Puzzled, Regulus let himself fall gently on his bum, his legs spread over Sirius’, “ why? ”

“Well, I’m sort of in the process of… erm,” Sirius scratched the back of his head.

Then Regulus recalled what he’d read in his herbology text. One of the uses of the mandrake leaf was in the initial steps of an animagus process. A witch or wizard must keep the leaf in their mouth for an entire month, full moon to full moon. If they failed to do this, they’d have to start the process all over again. The mandrake leaf was a foul tasting substance and would grow slimier and denser with each passing day. It was not a pleasant experience - at least that’s what it said in the books.

“Sirius Black, you are a fucking idiot!”

“James and Peter are doing it, too!” 

As if that made it any better, but that did explain the boys’ odd behavior at dinner the night prior. Clearly, Lupin had more sense than all of them combined to stay out of it.

Regulus sighed, “how much longer?” 

“The full moon is on the 8th,” Sirius leaned back on his elbows, breathing deeply.

Regulus rubbed the tears out of his eyes. It was all too much to process.

“Sirius, you have to stop doing stupid shite.”

His brother broke into that beautiful crooked grin of his, “if I stopped doing stupid shite, what would you do?”

“Live a peaceful life.”

Sirius shook his head slowly, “there’s no peace in being a Black.”

Chapter Text

January 5, 1974

The rest of the holiday was a bit of a blur, as Regulus fought heavily to not take another mental leave . Robin wasn’t talking to anybody except Pandora and Pandora was keeping more to herself than usual. As to not make it obvious, the metamorphmagus began to spend more time with Xeno, Bertha, and Olivia, slowly earning their trust. With Pandora out making new friends and Robin silently cursing Regulus, he felt terribly alone. All Barty and Evan wanted to do was practice dueling. Regulus would have eagerly joined them, but they were already so much more advanced than him. A visit to the hospital wing was not on his agenda for the holiday. After his emotional encounter with Sirius, he wasn’t sure if he should give his brother some space or follow him around like a lost puppy. In the end, Regulus decided to avoid his brother, as is what he does best. 

The first Saturday of the new year brought the return of the rest of Hogwarts’ student body. Regulus was practically itching to get to Cissy and ask her what was going on beyond the castle walls. He didn’t dare risk writing to his cousin, fearful of his owl being intersected by her mother, or worse, Bella. There was no doubt his mother would have raged to the rest of their family over Regulus’ absence. He could practically hear Walburga cursing him and comparing him to Sirius. Her voice could not be easily forgotten, even after months of not being home.

Much like Christmas morning, Hogwarts awoke to freshly fallen snow, only this time it was more of a blizzard. Wind whistled through the courtyards and whipped around the many towers. Being below the earth the dungeons were frigid, causing the Slytherins to emerge from their snake hole and seek out the warmth of the halls. The outdoor bridges connecting each section of the castle were slick with ice, keeping the Ravenclaws trapped in their tower. Not only was Pandora cut off from Xeno and Olivia, they were now cut off from Ashe and Goldstein. 

The day dragged as those who remained at the castle waited for the train to finally return to Hogsmeade. Evan was convinced the professors would have to send out for dragons to defrost the train tracks - as if incedio wasn’t a simple spell to cast. Regulus could have sworn his eyes would soon roll right out of his head if Evan didn’t shut it. Even the little time spent with his friends was weighing on him. Spending almost an entire month cooped up with the same lot with nothing to do was a recipe for disaster. Though, at least Regulus hadn’t cursed anyone. He was more than happy to move on with the Spring term and welcome back the other students. 

Robin was trying will all her might not to even look in Regulus’ direction. She couldn’t hide behind her journals very long. Her round eyes had a color to them which was reminiscent of a spring puddle or ginger root; a color so light and unique, Regulus often wondered about them. He hadn’t noticed he was staring until Robin angrily squinted at him from behind her glasses, a look that shouted, ‘what are you gawking at?’ Regulus quickly averted his gaze and was met with Barty’s brooding, cold, dark stare. 

“What’s got you so jumpy, Black?” Crouch smirked.

“Nothing,” Regulus turned down his gaze as a shiver ran up his spine; whether it was the chill in the air or Barty’s creepy demeanor, he wasn’t quite sure.

Their small group had gathered in the corridor leading to the kitchens, soaking up as much warmth as possible without invading the Hufflepuff’s space, though Bertha was the only Hufflepuff in the entire castle and she was held up in her own dormitory. They took up residency along the stone walls, gathered in the wools and fur lined robes. For the better half of the day, they were all relatively quiet, working on last minute assignments and reading up on new material for the coming term. Around midday, Rosier became restless. The constant thunk thunk thunk of a rubber ball against the wall was slowly sending Regulus over the edge. He looked up from his reading, expecting everyone else to be at their wits end, though it appeared nobody seemed to notice. Evan was lying on his back, legs stretched up against the stones, mindlessly repeating the act.

“Do you mind?” Regulus hissed.

Evan only glanced at him and continued without a word.

“ Accio. ” The ball sailed down the hall, landing in Regulus’ outstretched hand.

“Hey!”

“You’ve done it now,” Pandora tisked as she flipped through a copy of Witch Weekly. 

Regulus ignored her, though little Lupin’s giggling was adding fuel to the fire.

“Give it back, Black.” Evan was standing over him, a pout forming on his chapped lips.

“If I do, you’re just going to be bloody insufferable as usual.”

“Your attitude is insufferable! I can’t help you’re a miserable twat that has to ruin everyone else's fun.” 

Barty snorted.

Regulus launched the ball down the empty hall, its bounce echoed until it could be heard no more. 

“ Fetch. ”

Before either boy could move, Robin slammed her book down, threw her cloak to the floor, and matched towards the lost ball. Everyone wordlessly watched as she disappeared into the darkness. After an eternity, Robin emerged. She stomped right up to Rosier, noses almost touching, and shoved the ball at his chest with such force the boy stumbled back a bit.

“Play nice, Rosie.”

Regulus would have laughed if he wasn’t so frightened by Robin’s tone. Evan flopped down on the floor, a scowl pressed hard on his face. Pandora only shook her head, having not even looked up to witness the scene. Little Lupin was snuggled up on Pandora's side, a mischievous smile playing on her lips. In her knit hat, she looked so much like her brother. The same nose, the same amber eyes, the same freckles even. The only thing Romilda lacked in comparison to Remus was the scars. The girl’s face was blemish free and beautiful. Regulus wondered if Remus envied her. Regulus knew what it was to envy a sibling. Perhaps he and Remus shared more than he initially realized. 

As Regulus observed his friends, he realized each of them were grappling with sibling relations. All except Evan… maybe that’s what made him so annoying, he had nobody to put him in his place. Pandora loved her brother, yet the two were growing further and further apart. Robin despised her brother, yet they seemed more at ease with each other more than ever before. Barty’s half-sister was his complete opposite in every way, and he essentially denied her existence for years. Sirius was wild and unpredictable, well liked and outgoing, all things Regulus would never be. Even so, he couldn’t imagine a world without his brother or a world where they weren’t always together. Sirius was the only person who understood him, regardless of how little they spoke or how different their experiences were. Did any of his friends feel this same way? Surely they must have. It didn’t matter that Michael was a borderline psychopath, he was Robin’s brother . Prometheus may have chosen his own path, one Pandora wouldn’t entirely agree with, but she was his sister . Nothing else mattered. 

When the Hogwarts Express finally arrived, Regulus was first in line to greet his cousin. He stood at the bottom of the steps to the Great Hall, hands stuffed in his pockets, nervously rocking on his heels. He was both absolutely ecstatic and anxious to the point of nausea. Regulus knew Cissy would return with news of home, of the Dark Lord and his plans. He wasn’t really sure if he even wanted to hear about it all, but he craved the gossip. Narcissa walked arm in arm with Lucius, white furs draped around her shoulders. Her pale white skin appeared even lighter in contrast to the deep red that bit at her cheeks. Narcissa appeared as regal as ever, as if she became more womanly over the past few weeks. She was slightly thinner in the face, accentuating her sharp cheekbones and chin. Her hair was chopped short, coming a few inches below her ears. A dark green beret fit snug on her head. Lucius had his long hair combed out to the sides, just touching his shoulders. Regulus thought it odd for him to have hair longer than his girlfriend’s. Malfoy looked significantly less poised than Narcissa. Though in Regulus’ mind, nobody would be good enough for her.

The seventh years were flanked by their posse; Crabbe, Goyle, Snyde, Parkinson, Wilkes, and even Avery. The youngest boy trailed behind them, his chest puffed out and arrogance wafting about him. The other students steered clear of the Slytherins, as if there were a force pushing them back. As soon as Narcissa spotted Regulus, her entire demeanor altered. Her gray eyes came to life and her smile was one that rivaled Sirius’. All of Regulus’ worries melted away as Narcissa broke her grip on Lucius’ arm and came running up the stairs. 

Their embrace was soul crushing. Regulus could feel a piece of Narcissa pouring into him. Somehow he was being simultaneously shattered and stitched back up. He felt like he was intruding on something deeply personal, and that alone told him something immensely transformative had occurred over the holiday. 

“What’s happened, Cissy?” he murmured into his cousin’s shoulder.

“Oh, Reggie.” She pulled back, tears pooling in her eyes and a smile on her lips. Narcissa pushed a bit of hair out of his eyes, she appeared to be looking at him for the first time, “I have so much to tell you.”

“Alright, go on then.” Regulus straightened himself, hoping to appear more mature.

Narcissa adjusted her hat and furs, “after dinner, Regulus.”

As she spoke his name, Malfoy was suddenly beside her. The older boy’s face lacked emotion, his icy blue eyes looked right through Reggie. He wrapped his arm around Narcissa’s thin waist, pulling her tight to his side. They fit together like a beautiful puzzle. Regulus didn’t know Malfoy well, but he could feel Narcissa’s love flowing out of her when he was near. The emotion was enough to get drunk off of and suddenly Regulus was yearning to get back to Robin and apologize to her. He shook his head lazily and smiled at his cousin. Regulus knew that she knew, as she only returned the smile and stepped around him. Narcissa squeezed his shoulder lightly before passing through the Great Hall doors. 

Regulus remained at the top of the stairs as the students funneled in. He earned himself a scowl from Avery, though he hadn’t a clue as to why. A light dusting of snow covered the heads and shoulders of each student as they emerged from the bitter winter. They carried in a cold draft, but Regulus didn’t mind it so much. He hardly looked at those passing him by until the scent of a heavy perfume drew his eyes up to none other than Selena Slughorn. She had made herself scarce after the whole incident on the train last spring, which was no surprise. However, the flirtatious wink she flashed at Regulus was certainly unsuspected. As quick as Selena had appeared, she was gone. He spun around to see if anyone had been standing behind him,hoping she had been winking at someone else. He was met with a stone cold wall. 

Regulus could feel the blush rising to his cheeks as he struggled to make sense of the interaction. He hardly ever saw the girl outside of meals and their shared common room. Not to mention, she was two years ahead of him in school. Perhaps she mistook him for Sirius. That was the only conclusion he allowed himself to believe. Mixed with confusion and intrigue, Regulus couldn’t stop replaying the memory. Lost in thought, he was startled by Pandora and Romilda’s sudden appearance. 

“What are you waiting for Reggie, come inside before you miss the feast!” Pandora was alive with light and joy, as she dragged Regulus into the Great Hall, arm in arm.

He missed walking with Pandora like that. They had both been so caught up in their own problems lately, he couldn’t help but feel like he’d been neglecting his friendship. Regulus silently vowed to make it up to her and put in the effort she deserved. 

The feast went on without a hitch. No pranks or problems, just a bunch of jubilant children running off the high of their winter holiday. Having everyone back in the Great Hall brought a much needed warmth to Hogwarts. It felt like what Christmas day would have felt like if they had all celebrated together. Chatter filled the halls, as everyone rushed back to their respective common rooms to catch up and mingle. The happiness was contagious, and Regulus felt it growing inside of him like an Alihotsy tree. 

When the Slytherins returned to the dungeons, Regulus no longer noticed the damp coolness which had forced them out that same morning. He was practically bouncing with anticipation as he awaited Narcissa’s news. She strolled into the common room, winter furs draped over her arm, and her free hand intertwined with Malfoy’s. Words, unheard to Regulus, were exchanged between the two before she gently kissed Lucius’ cheek and let him continue on to his dormitory. 

Narcissa silently beckoned Regulus to a couple of large chairs looking out into the lake, both upholstered with green velvet and trimmed with ornate wood carvings of snakes. The back of the chair was tall and narrow, reminiscent of a throne. It wasn’t difficult to imagine Narcissa as a queen, all she needed was a crown.

“Tell me everything.” Regulus could hardly contain himself.

Narcissa stroked her hair nervously, though her thin smile never wavered, “I wouldn’t say there’s either good news or bad news. It’s all a bit… odd .”

“Okay?” Regulus leaned back in his chair, feeling all too small for it.

“I suppose I’ll start with the simplest bit first,” Narcissa drew in a deep breath, “Andy had a baby.”

She didn’t allow Regulus to process that information very long.

“A little girl to be exact. Her name is Nymphadora and she’s actually almost eight months old now. The two of you happen to share a birthday.” 

Regulus’ heart began fluttering out of control. He wished Andy would have told him along with his Christmas gift.

“Nobody knew, of course. Andromeda sent me a letter on Christmas day, sharing how she wished she had told me sooner and wanted me to meet my niece-”

“ Did you? ”

Narcissa nodded.

“She’s beautiful, Reggie. She’s a metamorphmagus, just like your friend.”

Just like Pandora. The news made him happier than he’d ever been before. The news of his cousins reconnecting was something he had never dreamt possible.

“So are you and Andy… are you okay?”

“I suppose.” Narcissa deflated a bit, “there’s been so much damage done already, as you well know. I may not approve of her husband, but she’s still my sister. Not to mention, I have a niece, my god daughter, to look out for.”

Narcissa stopped suddenly, as if realizing something peculiar.

“Well, actually, that’s all a bit nuanced, now,” she laughed lightly.

“How do you mean?”

“I’ve discovered that I’m not actually Andromeda’s sister, nor Bella’s.” There was a mixture of sadness and hope in the air, “Regulus, I’m your sister.”

He must have heard incorrectly.

“My what?”

Cissy straightened herself, gathering all her strength and dignity in a single motion. “I am Walburga’s daughter. That makes me yours and Sirius’ older sister.”  

Regulus felt as if the house castle could hear his heart beating. “How is that even possible?”

“Walburga was young and in love with Finn Rosier.”

Regulus’ eyes grew wide at her casual reveal.

“Evan’s father,” she clarified, as if Regulus needed any clarification, “they were in their seventh year and Walburga was betrothed to your father. Who is eleven years Walburga’s senior, mind you. My conception was almost the scandal of a generation. That was until Druella, Finn’s eldest sister, and mother to Bellatrix and Andromeda, offered to adopt me. Nobody outside our family knew the truth and soon enough, many of them forgot entirely.”

“Evan’s mentioned having a sister who died before he was ever born. That’s you? ”

Narcissa shrugged, “I suppose so.”

Regulus was on his feet. “Oh Merlin, you’re my sister and Evan’s?”

“Indeed I am.” Narcissa was remarkably calm. 

“How did you learn all this?”

“That brings me to my next bit of news.” Narcissa held up her left hand, where a ring of silver, black onyx, emeralds, and diamonds, shone proudly.

“ You’re getting married? ” Regulus shouted.

They were lucky, everyone had retreated to their dorms. Surely, the news would be spread across all houses by the next morning if anybody heard him.

Narcissa nodded excitedly, “I am, and I couldn’t be more thrilled, but please let me continue, Reggie.” 

Regulus flopped down in his chair.

“When Lucius and I get married we have to register with the Ministry. Druella and Cygnus knew that when the time came, I’d have to submit loads of paperwork which would include information about my birth. They were forced to tell me the truth.”

Regulus ran his fingers through his curls anxiously, “this is insane, Cissy!”

“A bit, I agree,” Narcissa blew an exasperated raspberry, an action completely contradicting the regal painting Regulus had imagined.

“Does this change anything?”

She pondered his question for a moment, “I don’t think so. I am both a Rosier and a Black, as I’ve always been. Though I am no longer of the male lineage of the Black family. Not that it really matters, you and Sirius have always been far ahead of us girls in that regard, but now I am a Rosier through my father. I suppose that changes my status, slightly. Soon, I’ll be a Malfoy, though. That’s all that matters.”

Was it sadness or acceptance which lingered in her tone? Regulus wasn’t quite sure, which was odd for Narcissa. If Regulus wasn’t sure, then neither was she.

“But does it change anything between us?”

Narcissa flashed that brilliant grin that only she and Sirius seemed to share, “I think deep down I’ve always had a greater connection to you and Sirius, though I never understood why until now. I’ve gained three brothers, Regulus, and I couldn’t be more thrilled.”

“What about Bella and Andy?”

Narcissa let out a small sigh, “they will always be my sisters. I grew up with them, played and fought, gossiped, and braided their hair and practiced makeup. Nothing will change that. So, technically they’re my cousins now, but you were too once and that never changed my love for you.”

Regulus allowed her words to wash over him. For the most part, that was all good news. He quickly realized she hadn’t told him everything.

“And the bad news?” He peered at her through his long hair, silently noting to get it cut soon.

“The task the Dark Lord has entrusted Lucius and I with is proving to be more difficult than anticipated. The Dark Lord is a sort of… collector, if you will. The objects he possesses are dangerous. Lucius has taken on the bulk of this task to protect me, but it’s making him cold and distant. Even with the help of my abilities, he fights unbelievably hard to maintain control of his temper. I share this with you, because I’m leaving the team and am in need of a new keeper-”

“I am not doing that.”

“I’m not asking you to. I need help finding someone.”

“What about Dorcas?”

“She’s a chaser through and through. I’m not going to force her to be a keeper.”

“Why do you need my help? I’m just a second year.”

“A second year whom I believe will be captain one day. This is an opportunity to prove yourself, Regulus.” Narcissa stood, indicating the conversation was over, no matter what Regulus said next.

He could do nothing but accept, “okay, I’ll do it.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” Narcissa gathered her belongings and made way to the girl’s dormitory.

 “Cissy, wait!” Regulus took his cousin - sister - by the waist, nearly knocking the wind out of her, “I’m glad you’re my sister.”

***

January 8, 1974

Mandrake leaves which have resided inside of a teenage boy’s mouth for a month have the absolute most foul stench. Regulus had been recruited to help mix the animagus potion for Sirius, Potter, and Pettigrew - a task he took on in exchange for 20 galleons, 5 chocolate frogs, and the truth behind the madness. This last condition had been negotiated between the Gryffindors at great length before Lupin had walked in on the conversation and agreed easily.

“You can tell him. I trust him.” 

As simple as that, the moods of the other three boys changed in an instant and Sirius agreed to share the truth when they got together that evening. The animagus process was a complicated one and certainly not something Regulus believed his brother and friends to pull off easily. He had to see it all for himself. 

As quickly as the snow came, it melted away, giving Regulus the perfect opportunity to collect the dew needed for the potion. Potter had secured the chrysalis of the Death’s-head Hawk Moth under mysterious circumstances. Professor Slughorn was the only individual in all of Hogwarts who could have had it and Regulus doubted the old man would be giving it out to anyone - especially not Potter. The only known use of the chrysalis was for the animagus potion, no student could casually ask for it. For these reasons, Regulus decided he didn’t want to know how James had procured the chrysalis. 

The full moon rose over Scotland, cascading its light over Hogwarts. Sirius and his friends were quite worried about the recent snow storms and the possibility of clouds in the evening sky. They required a crystal clear night, or else they’d have started the whole process over again. 

Regulus met the other boys in the astronomy tower after his evening class. Trying to find an excuse as to why he wasn’t leaving right away, especially given the midnight hour, proved to be a challenge. Fortunately, his tone reflected his serious need to be alone and Pandora was able to get the others moving without further questions. A few moments passed as Regulus nervously paced the tower, waiting for his brother’s arrival. Without making a sound, Sirius, Potter, and Pettigrew emerged from thin air, just a foot from where Regulus stood. At first he believed they had apparated, but there was no auditory indication of that and everyone knew students couldn’t apparate within Hogwarts’ walls. Then Regulus saw the shimmery cloak wrapped around Potter’s shoulders and had his answer in an instant. 

“Who’d you pilfer an invisibility cloak from, Potter?”

“Family heirloom.” James’ grin may not have been as photogenic as Sirius’, but it was certainly contagious. 

“Right then.” Regulus pulled three small vials from his robes, each already equipped with a silver teaspoon of dew, “spit out your leaves.”

Each boy did so happily, all while Regulus fought to hold down his dinner.

“I’m so bloody glad to be rid of that rotten filth! We can finally eat again, boys!” Sirius was ecstatic, to say the least.

Potter added a chrysalis to each vial, while Regulus forcibly removed a hair from each of their heads.

“Now, before I do this, you gotta pay up,” Regulus stretched out an open hand in which James gave up his galleons and Peter his chocolate frogs.

“The truth?” He looked only to Sirius and knew for sure he’d be able to tell if his brother was lying.

Sirius nodded at his friends before drawing a deep breath, “Remus is a werewolf.”

Regulus snorted, “yeah and I’m the queen of England. Try again.”

“It’s the truth, Reg,” James whispered, “we wouldn’t be putting our lives on the line like this for no reason.”

Regulus struggled to find the connection. “You three are becoming animagi because why? You feel left out or something?”

“Werewolves don’t do well on their own. Remus needs a pack, other animals to bond with. As animagi, he won’t hurt us,” Sirius explained.

“That’s so beyond stupid, S.” Regulus rolled his eyes.

“Do you really think Remus would let us do this if he didn’t think it could work?”

“I think you’d do it even if Lupin didn’t want you to.”

“Whatever, that doesn’t matter. So do you believe us or what?” Sirius crossed his arms defiantly. 

Surely, Remus being a werewolf would explain the scars, his limp, and his occasional odd behaviors. Though, the Ministry would never allow a werewolf at Hogwarts. It was unbelievably dangerous. As the light of the full moon washed over Regulus, he knew it had to be true. Regulus hated to admit it, but Sirius hadn’t been lying. Remus Lupin was in fact a werewolf. The realization of this fact didn’t bother Regulus as much as he thought it ought to. If anything, he was mildly upset that he and Lupin didn’t share the same harmful habit of playing with fire. 

“I believe you.” Regulus added each boy’s hair into its respective vial. “Pray the electrical storm comes soon or else you lot are going to experience far worse than bad dreams for Merlin only knows how long.”

“Cheers to that,” Pettigrew, who had been silent up until that moment, mumbled as he shoved his vial into his robes. 

“Don’t forget your incantations or else you’ll die,” Regulus added over his shoulder, as he was already making his way down the stairs.

“Cheerful as ever, Reg!” Sirius hollered after him, with a laugh.  

Since Narcissa’s news, Sirius was more joyful than ever. It had only been three days since finding out, but the kid was excited. Since his and Regulus’ last conversation, Regulus wasn’t sure his brother would ever really return to normal. With how Sirius had been behaving recently, Regulus wondered if he had dreamt the whole ordeal. Sirius was buzzing with life and his soul was ablaze. Yet, Regulus still couldn’t help but worry about him. No matter how out of hand Sirius got, Regulus would eagerly keep all his secrets. The animagus process, Lupin being a werewolf, Sirius’ own doubts of self worth, and any secret that had yet to be divulged, Regulus would keep it without a second thought. He’d do whatever it took to keep Sirius happy.

Chapter Text

February 14, 1974

Valentine’s Day is absolutely wretched. 

The decor around the castle had Regulus seeing red - quite literally. Along with shades of pink and purple. Perhaps it was the overabundance of doily-like streamers or the profuse scent of jasmine and rose petals at every turn in the castle that made the second year’s blood boil. It was certainly the way the young witches giggled and screeched like lunatics every time a boy breathed in their general direction that had Reggie rolling his eyes nearly out of his skull. It was all too much. Too in his face. How could he focus on anything else when the joke of a holiday was being shoved down his throat?

On that horribly frigid Thursday morning, Regulus had awoken to an empty dorm room, fully illuminated by the sun’s reflection on the lake. He never slept in and those assholes he was forced to live with had let him. There was no time for breakfast and he hoped that there was indeed time to get to defense against the dark arts without making a fool of himself. As he flew about the room, dressing himself and gathering his books, he tripped over a spare broom sticking out beneath Evan’s bed. Books scattered from his arms as Regulus cursed violently, promising to himself to get Rosier back for his untidiness. 

From his position on the floor, Regulus spotted a bit of parchment beneath his bedside table. He was usually quite neat when it came to his personal belongings, believing the parchment had somehow found its way from Evan’s side. Though as he reached for the paper, Regulus’ face fell. He knew exactly what collected dust on the cold dungeon floor. Exactly a year prior he’d received two anonymous letters and had exiled their contents from his mind ever since, for fear of what they meant. Fear of whom they may have been from. Just another reason to hate Valentine’s Day. 

Regulus could have sworn the letters he’d gotten last year were buried in his trunk, yet here they were. Had someone gone snooping through his stuff or had he misplaced the Valentines in the past twelve months? He didn’t have an answer for that. He read the words over again for the first time in a year and still hadn’t the faintest idea of who had written them. Regulus stuffed the small cards in the pocket of his robe before heading out the door.

Cheeks flushed and chest heaving, Regulus made it to class with only seconds to spare. 

“Black, you’re a wreck, what happened?” Robin crossed her arms accusingly.

“These twats,” Regulus shoved his rucksack into Crouch’s chest, “let me sleep in this morning. Thanks for nothing.”

“We ain’t your keepers, Reg,” Evan snapped.

Pandora’s eyes widened at the bite in Rosier’s tone.

“I’ll make sure to remind you of that next time you decide to sleep in, eh?” Regulus shoved between the two boys as he entered the tower classroom. 

From behind him, Reg heard Robin let out a low whistle before falling into step with him. They hadn’t spoken in weeks, yet suddenly they were on speaking terms again? Reg wasn’t buying it.

“You know, you should really learn to leave your drama at the door, Black. Temper tantrums are unbecoming of you,” she said sweetly - mockingly. 

Regulus’ cheeks burned as he took his seat, his eyes glued to the chalkboard ahead.

“You must have forgotten what day it is, easy mistake I’m sure.” Robin twirled her wand in her hand from where she sat next to Regulus, her dark eyes gleaming with amusement.

“Is there something you want, Mulciber?” Regulus forced out through gritted teeth. 

“ Mulciber ?” She grinned and Regulus’ heart leapt, “what have I done to deserve you calling me by my surname?”

Regulus turned to face her fully, “and what have I done to deserve your sudden attention?” 

Hurt flashed across Robin’s face only briefly before she continued, “we can’t let bygones be bygones?”

“Whatever,” Regulus huffed, turning back towards the board.

Internally, he was over the moon that Robin had chosen to speak to him again. It was just the rotten start to his day that had him in a mood. And the Valentines that burned a hole through his pocket reminded him of just who may have written them. Was Robin being nice solely because of what day it was? Regulus wouldn’t allow himself to believe that. 

Robin leaned in closer, causing a chill to run up Regulus’ spine.

“Look, I need to get into the restricted section tonight and I want you to come with me. Is that enough of a reason to just move on?” The pleading in her tone was evident. 

Regulus sighed, “yeah, fine, I’ll go with you.”

“Excellent.” She threw her hair over her shoulder as a smirk played on her lips.

Regulus, though his eyes were fixed on professor Dunn, didn’t pay a lick of attention during the entire class. Nor during the following two classes. His mind swam with possibilities of what Robin could possibly want from the restricted section and why she needed him of all people to join her.

***

Not only had Regulus missed breakfast, but he had missed dinner as well. As the rest of the castle scurried off to the great hall for a holiday feast, Robin Mulciber dragged Regulus by the sleeve of his robe to the library. 

“Robin, I’m starving , can’t we go after dinner?”

“When all the fifth years return for some late OWL preparations? I think not.”

Regulus groaned. 

“Oh hush up, I packed turkey sandwiches.”

“Delightful, we can leave evidence of our trespassing with breadcrumbs.”

“More for me then.”

They were silent after that. 

The library was dead quiet with not a single student to be seen. Robin led them confidently to the gated off section of the room, where very few students ever dared to go. Robin certainly looked as if she belonged; chin held high, eyes locked on her target, no hesitation at all. The first step to being accepted where you don’t belong is to believe you belong there yourself. It was a shame nobody except Regulus had been there to witness Robin’s excellent performance. Though maybe it was all for him.

Robin removed a pin from her hair, inserting it in the lock of the gate. When the mechanism clinked open, Robin turned to give Regulus a knowing wink. 

“They waste so much effort on charms, that they forget muggle lockpicking exists,” Robin whispered followed by a quiet snort. 

Regulus had to admit, he was impressed.

“What are we after anyway?” Regulus asked as they descended the stairs into the lower levels of the restricted section.

“Two things,” Robin held her fingers over her shoulder as Regulus walked behind her, “one, the cursed vaults and two, I had a vision that I need to investigate further.”

“A vision of what exactly?”

Robin spun on her heel, her hair nearly whipping Regulus across the face, “a vision so awful, I snapped out of my disdain for you and decided we’re better off friends rather than nothing at all. I can’t make sense of it all yet, so I’ve decided to come here for answers.”

Regulus gulped, but didn’t ask any further questions. The two descended further.

“I know Pandora is helping with the vaults again,” Robin noted as they reached the bottom of the steps, “but I knew the others wouldn’t have the balls to come down here yet. We’re finally one step ahead of them.”

“Do you really think there’d be books about the vaults kept in here?”

“Doesn’t hurt to look.” Robin shrugged, then lit her wand.

The dull glow illuminated the witch’s face. Robin was just weeks away from turning thirteen. Her facial features had sharpened slightly, her lips had grown a bit fuller, and her chest - well, Regulus didn’t need to look directly at the growing womanly feature to know what had been developing. Almost all the girls in their year were beginning to mature, sending the young wizards into a frenzy. It was probably for the best that Regulus was used to spending time alone. Though, he heard enough of what Avery and some of the older boys said in the common room late at night to know which of the girls in their house had glorious knockers . Evidently, Robin was one of those girls. 

All of that aside, Robin was undoubtedly beautiful. Regulus knew that she’d grow up to be a scary kind of pretty, similar to the beauty Narcissa and Bellatrix possessed. Intimidating. She was so different from Pandora, who had a softness to her like Andy or even Lily Evans. There was nothing scary about Pandora, nor would there ever be. The thought of his two friends made the Valentines in his pocket feel like deadweights. 

“ Black ,” Robin hissed, motioning with her wand for Regulus to follow.

Regulus fell in step behind her, scanning the titles of the books they passed. 

“Where are we going?”

“In one of my visions I got a glimpse of a book, Secrets of The Darkest Art ,” Robin said in hardly a whisper.

Somehow Regulus knew she wasn’t talking about the vaults, but whatever else haunted her. Sure, the vaults were cursed, but mention of the vaults never sent a chill down Regulus’ spine. Deeper and deeper into the restricted section they walked. It was either a miracle or the worst luck imaginable that they hadn’t been caught. The floor sloped slightly, making it nearly impossible for Regulus to tell how far down the restricted section truly went. Robin stopped at an iron gate, a stone spiral staircase on the other side. A restricted section within the restricted section.

“It’s in here.”

From within her robes, Robin produced a vial of dark liquid. She dipped two fingers in the substance and began to smear it across the bars. As she traced the lines and geometric shapes, the liquid began to glow. For just a moment time seemed to freeze. Then the gate slowly swung inward with the most God awful creak. 

“What the hell did you just do?” 

Regulus had never seen magic like that before. Had never heard of anything remotely similar to what Robin had just done.

“Runes traced in pig’s blood,” she said all too casually, not meeting Regulus’ stare.

He wasn’t sure whether to be terrified or impressed. 

“I only saw it in my vision. I’ve never even used runes before, let alone magic like this.”

The way Robin said those words transported Regulus back onto the Hogwarts Express for the very first time. When he had met Robin she was just a shy kid like himself, hiding behind her hair and never saying more than a few words at a time. The magic she had just demonstrated was a testament to what they’d gone through since that very first day. They had changed far too much in such a short amount of time. And at what cost?

Regulus only nodded as they headed down the cool damp stairs. The stones were slippery and the lack of railing made Regulus light his own wand for good measure. It wasn’t too long before the stairwell opened up into a small chamber. Three of the four walls were lined with books, though the ceiling hung low. Regulus could feel the dark magic emanating from the shelves. He knew that feeling well; had felt it in his own home and at the Malfoy’s and at the Burke’s. But in this room, smaller than his dormitory, the feeling was amplified tenfold. Pulsing. Sickening. Suffocating. Intoxicating. 

Whatever book Robin was looking for, they found it. 

Leaving Regulus in the doorway, Robin strolled towards the shelf opposite them. Her footsteps barely made a sound as she passed over the worn stone. She was like a ghost on water. Wordlessly, she plucked a thick, cloth bound tome from the shelf above her head. Even in the dark light, Regulus could see the glimmer of deep purple foiling on the cover and spine. 

“There’s no curses on that thing right? Like if we open it the book won’t try to kill us?”

“It wanted to be found. It showed itself to me.”

God she was fucking terrifying. If Robin was nearly as scared as Regulus was, she did a damn good job of hiding it. She slid the book into her robes and left Regulus in the doorway as she climbed back up the stairs. 

If she knew where the book was all along, why did she need me to come with her?

Regulus shook his head as he scrambled to follow his friend back towards the restricted section. Once on the other side of the gate, Robin casted scourgify and by doing so removed all evidence of her rune. Like it never even happened.

“Now it’s your turn,” Robin announced as if Regulus had any clue as to what that meant.

“To do what exactly?”

“Find information on the vaults.”

Regulus’ patience was wearing thin.

“Robin, if I knew where to find the vaults, don’t you think I would have by now?”

“Of course, but tonight is the night you find what you’re looking for.”

“Merlin, your visions are helpful, but bloody creepy. You’re not going to go totally mad are you?” 

Robin didn’t answer, only stared at him with boredom in her eyes. Regulus wasn’t entirely sure where to look, but figured anything under “cursed” and “vaults” would be too on the nose. Regulus found himself between two rows; to his left was history and to his right were legends and folklore. Why any legends or folklore would be considered restricted information, led Regulus to believe he’d come to the right spot. Robin simply followed him as he scanned the shelves, helping herself to a turkey sandwich. Her robes must have had endless pockets to hold all the varying objects she stuffed in them. The robe had to weigh twice as much as herself. 

The surnames of almost every author were hauntingly familiar. Burke, Mulciber, Rosier, Gaunt, Avery, Rakepick, Carrow, Lestrange, Snyde, Runcorn, and Black . Regulus stopped dead in his tracks. Of course he knew his ancestors to be great witches and wizards, many of whom would go on to make various discoveries and publish some great academic work. Though to find so many names he associated with not only in the restricted section, but among the legends and folklore… well, it just didn’t make sense. Yet, Elladora Black’s name was etched into the spine of a slender brown book - no, journal. 

Elladora Black was something of a great aunt who supposedly never married or had children of her own. Regulus only knew her name from the tapestry at Grimmauld Place. He never expected to find her writings on the shelves of Hogwarts’ restricted section. There was no time for delicacy. Regulus snagged the leather bound journal from its dusty home on the shelf and furiously began reading. 

On the very first page, scribbled nearly illegibly, The Legend of The Cursed Vaults.

Then there were footsteps. Heavy male footsteps coming down the slopped aisle. Eyes wide, Regulus looked at Robin as if to say, you didn’t see that coming? Robin merely shrugged and snatched the book from Regulus’ hands, moving around the shelves to avoid the trespasser. Regulus put out the light of his wand in a huff and made to follow his friend through the darkness. Streaks of light and shadows danced across the floor and shelves as the unwelcome guest came nearer. They were quickly approaching the end of the restricted section when the sound of footsteps turned in their direction, cornering them. 

Neither Regulus nor Robin could afford a detention. There was too much at stake and if they were caught, surely their books would be confiscated. Regulus had no doubt whoever was closing in on them could feel the dark power seeping out of Secrets of The Darkest Art. Anyone with an ounce of greed and lust for power would be able to feel that book. Sure enough, as Robin rounded the final corner, Regulus hot on her heels, she came face to face with Lucius Malfoy. Regulus would have sighed in relief if not for the look of absolute contempt plastered upon the seventh year’s face. 

“What are you two doing here?” Malfoy practically growled.

Robin squared her shoulders, “none of your concern.”

“It is my concern, especially when I have been tasked with your well-being in more ways than one,” he spat.

“We were just leaving.” Regulus made to move past the older boy, but came to a crashing halt as Lucius tugged on his collar. 

“I’ll only ask once more, what are you doing here?”

“I’m completing my mission from the Dark Lord,” Robin responded all too calmly. 

Lucius went absolutely rigid as he studied the girl before him, almost two feet shorter than he and with hardly any magical skill in comparison - yet she made the wizard stop in his tracks and assess if Robin Mulciber was really worth the fight. 

“Get out. Don’t let me catch either of you in here again.”

Lucius threw Regulus through the gate and simply watched as Robin strolled past, in absolutely no rush to leave. Though their walk back to the dungeons was absolutely silent, Regulus could tell his friend was pleased with the results. It wasn’t until they reached the common room did Regulus realize she had used him as a means to an end. Robin had both books in her possession and may have been able to get them both on her own, without Regulus’ help. But she wanted Regulus to know what she had accomplished, what awaited him if he was just curious enough to ask. The quaffle was entirely in her hands, now. 

The common room was pretty much deserted, with many students having already taken off to bed. Leaving no one to overhear Robin as she said, “I did in fact write one of those Valentine’s burning a hole through your pocket, Black, but I have no desire to tell you which one. If you really want that answer and whatever answers lie in these books, you’ll do as I say from here on out. Is that understood?”

There was no playfulness or timidness in her words, only strength. And there was only one correct answer to her question, to which Regulus just nodded his head. He’d follow Robin Mulciber into the depths of the ocean if it came to it. Any doubt Regulus ever had before that moment vanished in an instant. There was nothing else except him, her, and the road which she was to pave ahead. 

Then she smiled. It wasn’t cat-like or insincere or even flirtatious. The joy reflected in those brilliant soft brown eyes indicated the truth in that smile. If Regulus hadn’t been scared shitless of her before, he was then. He didn’t think he’d ever stop being scared of Robin, though something else lingered and pushed in waves against that fear, something he couldn’t place. Regulus’ heart stammered as he watched his friend adjust her glasses and flip her hair over her shoulder for the hundredth time that day. Regulus Black had no reply as the witch bid him good night and thanked him for his help.

Maybe Valentine’s Day wasn’t so bad after all.

Chapter Text

March 5, 1974

For almost a month Regulus and Robin were joined at the hip. Through every class they assisted one another for the sole purpose of having more time to study the texts they acquired from the restricted section. Robin even came to every quidditch practice, though it meant sitting through snow and rain and the coldest of temperatures. She wouldn’t let Regulus out of her sight, having simply told him that she had a vision and needed to be with him at all times. Regulus didn’t dare ask what could have possibly turned her into an overbearing mother, but he didn’t mind her presence. 

He’d hardly noticed the passage of time, as every second of his day was mapped out by Robin. Regulus would have forgotten her birthday entirely if it wasn’t for Pandora. She had been spending the past few weeks cozying up to the Ravenclaws, only spending time with her fellow Slytherins during class. Her sunny presence was like a breath of fresh air as she ambushed their table at breakfast with a giant blue box in her arms. Pandora presented the box to Robin, positively beaming as she did so. Regulus was fairly sure the girls hadn’t spent any time together, seeing as he was with Robin pretty much every second of the day. It had been far too long since he’d last seen Pandora so happy.

“Open it, open it, open it!” Pandora squealed as she clapped her hands together. 

Delicately, Robin removed the ribbon from atop the box and tossed it into Barty’s lap. The boy didn’t even look up from his plate as he picked up the silk and tossed it across the table into Evan’s face. Regulus seemed to be the only one who paid them any mind, as Robin and Pandora were both solely focused on the oversized box. 

Robin stood to remove the contents of the box, producing a shimmering green dress robe. The hue of the garment was iridescent, changing from the darkest shade of green to black as it moved in the dim light of the great hall. From Regulus’ limited point of view, the robe seemed to have long bell sleeves and a high collar, with onyx buttons all the way up the left side from ankle to breast. It was one of the most well crafted robes Regulus had ever seen.

“Oh, Dora !” Robin gushed as she stood back to examine the piece, “where did you get this? Merlin, where would I even wear this?”

Pandora was beaming, “I made it!”

“You’re lying,” Robin gasped.

“Cross my heart,” Pandora said as she did in fact cross her heart, “I’ve been working on it since Christmas. I’d say I have a real talent, wouldn’t you agree?”

Robin only nodded as she ran her hands across the fabric. 

“And I charmed it, with Barty’s help, to grow with you. You may be thirteen now, but one day you’ll be a beautifully grown witch and might need a dress robe just like this one.”

Barty’s lips twitched upwards for just a moment, but Regulus caught it. Caught the glimmer of pride in his eyes. 

“Pandora, I don’t think any gift I ever give you will come close to matching this. I don’t know how I can accept.”

“You don’t have a choice. And the best part is, I made myself one in pink! We can match!”

Bless her heart. Regulus would have laughed if the moment hadn’t been so heartfelt. 

Then Robin announced to no one in particular, “nobody needs to get me a gift for as long as I shall live, for the wonderful Pandora Burke has exceeded all expectations. Any attempt to follow this act would be folly.” 

At this claim, Pandora’s hair turned the brightest shade of pink Regulus had ever seen on her. Pandora might have made Robin’s birthday, but Robin had most certainly made Pandora’s entire existence with just one statement. Regulus supposed he shouldn’t feel bad that he hadn’t gotten his friend a gift. Elladora’s journal was better than anything he could have gotten for her anyway. 

Robin’s eyes softened as she placed the robe back in the box and secured the lid, “thank you very much, Pandora. You are the bestest friend I could ever ask for.”

“Pandora, you do know this means you have to make dress robes for the rest of us now,” Evan teased as he attempted to tie the ribbon around his head. Pandora laughed, though Regulus knew Evan was not joking in the slightest. She didn’t know it yet, but she’d be outfitting their little group for the foreseeable future. 

***

March 13, 1974

It was likely Elladora Black had been absolutely mad during her eighty-one years of life. Her journal, which Regulus determined to have been written during her twenties, was a disoriented mess of stories. Some of the entries neither he nor Robin could determine if they were simply stories or experiences Elladora lived herself. What was especially difficult was her use of the second person. She never described the events as happening to herself or to others, rather it was all about you. The work was eerie at best, and that was putting it nicely. 

“They’re instructions.” Robin bolted up from her cauldron of swelling solution. 

All eyes were on her as she rummaged through her bag and produced the journal. Flipping open to a random page she began to read out loud, “ you enter through the wall hidden most well at the end of five layers. Beyond the wall you will find what appears to be banished and follow it down, down, down. The vault of ice has cursed you. Its treasures are for the taking, but only if you make it out. Your friend will likely deceive you . Black, she wrote instructions!”

“Even so, they don’t make any sense, she starts talking about something else entirely on the next page.”

Fire blazed in Robin’s eyes, “well then you’ll just have to decode her nonsense, Black. I’m sure the family connection will make it easier for you.”

Regulus couldn’t argue - didn’t want to argue. He took the journal without another word and returned to his own potion.

“What was that about?” Barty mumbled into his textbook.

“Stay out of it, Crouch.”

“You and Mulciber are thick as thieves lately, making the rest of us feel a bit left out.”

“For good reason.”

“Let me help you, Black.” Crouch sounded more sincere than he ever had in the two years Regulus had known him.

“What do you want in return?”

“An in.”

Regulus didn’t need to ask what he wanted an in to. Barty had been on Malfoy’s radar for some time now. Barty wanted the same responsibility, the same recognition Regulus craved. 

“Maybe,” was all Regulus said.

That seemed good enough for Crouch. 

***

March 30, 1974

It had been over two months Sirius and his friends had begun their animagus incantations. A long two months. The three boys were positively sickly, though they tried their very best to hide their symptoms. It got worse before it got better, that’s for sure. Regulus had mainly witnessed their odd behaviors during meals; though, at one point Sirius had actually growled at Snape in the halls. Pettigrew was more nervous and pale-faced than ever, if that were even possible. James on the other hand, sickly in appearance as he may be, exuded confidence. Regulus was glad to be rid of their antics, though he was curious as to what the process was like behind the scenes. He wanted details on their dreams and if any of them had a guess as to what their animagus form may take.

The quidditch season was coming to an end, with only two games left before the Quidditch House Cup. Today would be the deciding factor for Slytherin House, where they would take on Gryffindor. Neither team was all too thrilled about this. Worse yet, hauntingly dark clouds began to move in from beyond the mountains. A bitter cold wind swept through the castle grounds with the promise of an early spring storm. Normally, this wouldn’t be an issue, with Quidditch being one of those sports played rain or shine. Yet, the first electrical storm in over two months was beginning to roll in and Regulus knew precisely what that meant. 

The chatter in the great hall at breakfast that morning was louder than usual. The third year Gryffindors caused the bulk of the noise. Sirius and Potter were restless in their seats, sweat on their brows and terror in their eyes. If the storm arrived before the match finished, they’d be forced to make a choice. Forfeit their spots on the team by abandoning their positions or dying as a result of not taking the animagus potion when instructed to. Regulus wasn’t confident in their ability to make the correct decision. 

The entire student body began to make their way out to the pitch, resulting in a pileup in the halls. Regulus found himself shoulder to shoulder with his overly hyperactive brother. Sirius was hopping from foot to foot, fingers wiggling at his sides, and his eyes unable to stay fixed on anything.

“Alright, S?”

Sirius jumped a mile.

“Oh hi, Reg.” Sirius anxiously scratched the back of his neck, “great day for a match, yeah?”

“Something like that.” Regulus smiled slightly at the realization that Slytherin likely had this win secured. 

Sirius caught his brother’s smirk, “shut up, Reg.”

“I didn’t say a thing!” Regulus threw up his hands innocently.

“Oi, Potter!” Avery’s voice echoed through the hall.

Reg turned to find his roommate pushing and shoving through the crowd of students, Snape, Mulciber, and Burke on his heels. To Sirius’ left, Potter turned to face his competition. Though he was younger, Avery towered over them all. Regulus knew better to get in the wizard’s way. He wasn’t worth the physical effort he’d need to defend himself. Avery had a number of detentions which rivaled Sirius’ own - which was immensely impressive for those keeping track. Any association with Avery meant dealing with Severus and Michael, two particular Slytherins which Regulus was not at all fond of, regardless of their shared interests. 

“You look like you’ve seen a dementor, Potter. ‘Suppose you don’t have such high hopes for the match today, eh?” Avery jerked his chin at the Gryffindor chaser.

To Regulus’ dismay, Avery was whom Narcissa deemed her replacement as Keeper. The only decent thing to come out of her leaving the team was making Emma Vanity captain. Regulus wouldn’t have been able to bear Crabbe or Goyle in charge. 

Potter’s face went slack with boredom, “you would know the fear of a dementor, wouldn’t you, Avery? If memory serves me right, your father received the dementor's kiss over the holiday.”

Regulus stopped dead in his tracks. He had not heard anything about that and it had been months since the holiday. He had hardly any interactions with Avery since he’d gotten back at the end of the break. Had the incident with his father not been covered in the Daily Prophet? Regulus couldn’t recall reading anything about it. Regulus knew Potter wouldn’t lie about such things, and the look on Avery’s face told him all he needed to know. Potter kept his chin raised, though Regulus could see the sweat pooling at his brow. 

Sirius cleared his throat, “let’s move on, yeah?”

Taking both Regulus and James by the elbows, Sirius shuffled them forward through the crowd. While the students moved right towards the pitch, their small group headed left towards the lockers. Thunder boomed in the distance, causing Sirius and James to tense. 

“Do you have a plan for today?” Regulus asked under his breath.

“No,” Sirius responded sternly, pushing through the flaps of the locker tent. 

“You can’t possibly mean to play if it starts storming!”

“You’d like that wouldn’t you, Reg?” James smirked, pushing up his glasses, “we aren’t risking the cup.”

“So you’d rather risk your lives?”

“We have a plan.” Sirius shrugged casually. 

“Does your plan rely on Pettigrew fetching your vials? If so, I’d be most concerned about him royally screwing up.”

Sirius and James exchanged a weary look. 

Regulus rolled his eyes and scoffed, “Sirius, you don’t even really need to be here. It’s not like you’re playing.”

Hurt flashed across his brother’s face, “that’s not necessarily true.”

All season Sirius had been working his tail off to prove he deserved that A-team beater position. He’d seen a bit of play time, but not enough to really amount to much. Regulus wasn’t convinced his brother would be playing today, regardless.

“Maybe the storm will hold off until after the match,” James interjected.

Thunder cracked much too close for comfort.

“Oh, yes, I’m sure.” Regulus crossed his arms, waiting for his brother’s acceptance.

James looked up to the tent’s ceiling, anxiously hoping from foot to foot, “Merlin, screw it,” he shouldered past Reg and exited through the dingy cream colored flaps.

Sirius’ jaw clenched as he fought not to follow. As the storm moved closer, Regulus could tell his brother’s inner animagus was clawing to get out. Regulus almost felt bad for his brother, yet the Slytherin victory was at his fingertips. 

“It’s noble what you’re doing, S. Incredibly stupid, but I admire your willingness to help Lupin. I assume he’s with Pettigrew?”

Sirius nodded once.

“I’ll send Romilda and Pandora out to help. I take it you’ll be down by the lake?”

Again, Sirius nodded, not questioning Pandora and Romilda’s knowledge of it all. Regulus patted Sirius’ shoulder, lightly shoving him towards the exit.

“Don’t die.”

Sirius turned, flashing that grin of his, “don’t kick our arses too hard before you win, baby brother.”

***

Slytherin won in just under fifteen minutes. Without James, their leading scorer, Cresswell had to step up, clearly nervous about the large shoes he was forced to fill. The Gryffindor team was equally pissed and confused as they tried to organize themselves in the final moments before the match’s start. Gryffindor seeker, Katie Carter, had let the rain - which had begun to pour in the first few minutes - get the better of her. She was slow, laughably slow, essentially giving the snitch to Regulus. The young seeker had won the match in the very center of the pitch for all to witness.

With his long black hair plastered to his face and cold rain seeping through his uniform, Regulus turned on his broom, the golden snitch raised high above his head. Even through the storm he could see Robin, Barty, and Evan cheering fiercely from the stands. Narcissa’s white blonde hair shone like a beacon in the sea of black and green cloaks, untouched by the rain thanks to a clear bubble umbrella raised slightly above her. 

Though he had sent Pandora after James and Sirius, it still hurt to not see her cheering from the stands. Regulus was taking his team to the House Cup and he wanted everyone to know. Even with the victory, Regulus knew the talk would still center around James and Sirius. Everyone would be asking about where they had gone, why they had abandoned their team, what kind of cruel prank this was - even for them. Even if Slytherin were to win the Cup, which Regulus was almost certain they would, everyone would credit James and Sirius.

As the rain pounded into Regulus, still perched upon his broom, he realized that none of it even mattered. It was his fault for telling them to go. 

***

April 3, 1974

It had been four days and Pandora and little Lupin had not stopped talking about the animagus process.

“It was incredible,” Pandora gushed, “I think I may try it someday.”

“Are you out of your mind?” Regulus snapped, though he had been considering it himself.

“Do not take that tone with me, Regulus Black.”

The winter air had finally gone, taken by last Saturday’s storm. Their little group had found themselves sprawled out by the lake after class. With the spring holiday quickly approaching, the homework they’d received had piled up immensely. Books and parchment were spread across their blanket, though they were all distracted by the weather and conversation of quidditch and the silly possibility of them all becoming animagi. 

“If Sirius and his silly friends can do it, then why can’t we?” Pandora pouted. 

“I’m not saying we’re incapable, I’m just saying they’re idiots.”

“I think we should do it,” Robin spoke up from her corner of the blanket. 

She had been extremely upset with Regulus for not sharing with her the knowledge of what Sirius had been doing. Of course, he didn’t share Lupin’s secret. Everyone assumed Lupin was just smarter than his friends. He was , but Regulus and Romilda alone knew the truth behind his unwillingness to become an animagus.

“What do you suppose your animagus form would be, Robin?” Pandora asked.

“A Hebridean Black,” Robin answered, not caring to look up from her book.

“I think I’d be a unicorn,” Pandora mused.

Crouch snorted, “Pandora, you’d likely be a butterfly above all else.”

Pandora pondered this thoroughly, “I suppose I could live with that. Though do you reckon I’d have to be a caterpillar first ?”

Everyone, including Regulus, broke into a fit of giggles.

“Whatever could the brooding brigade find so funny? Please, do share.” Dorcas Meadowes teased as she approached them.

Regulus didn’t know Dorcas too well, aside from playing quidditch. Even being in the same classes didn’t matter, as she stuck with Florian and Lauren like glue. Florian, Regulus’ own roommate, was hardly ever around as he kept his distance. Crouch figured Florian thought he was better than the rest of them, calling him a pompous git on more than one occasion. 

“Dorcas, if you were an animagus what form do you think you’d take?” Pandora asked, shielding her eyes from the afternoon sun.

Though a seemingly harmless question, Regulus shot daggers at his friend.

Dropping her bag beside Pandora, Dorcas took a seat and crossed her legs carefully, “any sort of flying creature, I suppose. I just love being on my broom.”

“Barty here believes I’d be a butterfly .”

Dorcus did indeed laugh at that and soon settled into their supposed study group. Regulus didn’t particularly mind Dorcas, but she hadn’t been invited. Their conversations were now extremely limited due to the witch’s poor choice of when to be uncharacteristically friendly. To Regulus’ annoyance, Lauren and Florian did soon arrive. How they could all just suddenly pretend to be friends was a mystery to him. There was no reason to expand their brooding brigade , as Dorcas so affectionately labeled them. 

As the sun began to set over the lake and hunger overcame the group of Slytherins, Regulus was astounded to have Dorcas ask him, “what would your animagus form be, Black?”

“A gnat,” Barty answered for him.

Regulus glared at the boy, “I haven’t put much thought into it.”

“You do always seem to know everything about everyone,” Dorcas smirked, “perhaps you would be some sort of insect. A fly on the wall, maybe?”

Regulus noted the amusement in Robin’s eyes, though she didn’t even smile, let alone laugh at her roommate’s remark. 

“I think you’d make a lovely fire crab, or maybe a graphorn,” Pandora offered.

That set everyone into a fit of laughter, everyone except Regulus.

“Oh, leave Black alone,” Robin looped her arm through his as they all headed back towards the castle, “the only correct answer is a tiny black kitten.”

Regulus blushed in embarrassment. That same thought had crossed his mind a day prior. 

“If you’re all really serious about this, can we wait a year?” Little Lupin asked, “I don’t think first years are cut out for that kind of magic.”

Pandora squeezed the girl’s shoulders, “if you want us to wait, then we’ll wait. Can we all vow right here and now to begin our process this time next year?”

Murmurs of agreement spread through their group. It seemed like Regulus had a bit more research to do if they were to all go through with this. Slytherin house would be on its way to becoming animagi. Regulus was glad to know that if he were actually going to do it, he’d be doing so with friends.

***

April 12, 1974

Regulus may have been able to get away with not going home for Christmas, but the amount of howlers he had received leading up to Easter was abysmal. There was absolutely no way he was getting out of going home to Grimmauld Place this time. He hadn’t seen Walburga in over seven months . A glorious seven months. Not once since he’d been at Hogwarts had he felt any need to hurt himself, to pity himself to such a degree. The thought of going home had him itching for relief - something to satisfy his anxieties. To make it all the worse, they’d be going to Black Manor in Oxford for Easter dinner; home to his beloved aunt Druella and uncle Cygnus. 

In a shocking turn of events, Sirius was on his best behavior. Regulus assumed his brother hadn’t yet fully mastered his ability to change form at will. He saw his brother’s form only once thus far. The large black dog had leapt from the shadows of Hogwarts one evening, scaring Regulus nearly to death. Sirius struggled to change back, pacing back and forth across the hall, whining as he walked in circles. It wasn’t until James arrived, clearly out of breath, did Regulus realize it was his brother before him. One bad beating from Walburga, and Sirius would be shifting in a flash, ready to gnaw her face off, altering the ministry to his illegal animagus form. 

They were to spend the first three nights of the holiday in Oxford, fortunately for Regulus. His uncle’s house of horrors was terribly gloomy, leading Regulus to wonder how Narcissa put up with living there and further solidifying why Andy left. The manor was essentially Grimmauld Place, but five times larger and with a lake on the property.  The only perks to their stay was Narcissa’s company, as well as Robin’s. The Mulciber family had been invited to stay as well. No holiday visit would be complete without the intermingling of families and the overwhelming sense of anxiety in the air. 

Though Narcissa had broken the news to Regulus about her proper lineage, Walberga hardly acknowledged her niece - daughter. It was as if nothing had changed. Regulus supposed nothing really had changed, at least not for Walburga, though he wondered if his father knew about her young love affair with Rosier. It was highly likely if Orion had known about all that, he wouldn’t have married her in the first place. Regulus was smarter than to bring it up. The truth only mattered to him, Sirius, and Cissy anyway.

The whole weekend had been rather uneventful until Bella arrived. Flanked by her awful husband and his brother, the trio apparated right into Easter dinner with not so much as a warning owl. 

“Finish your meal, papa, the Dark Lord is coming,” Bella hissed to Cygnus. 

The whole room stiffened at the mention of Voldemort. The coin which Regulus always had in his pocket suddenly felt much heavier than usual, as if the mention of its creator had awoken it. Regulus could tell that Robin felt the shift in her necklace as well. Only moments after Druella had commanded their elf to rid the table of their meal, did Voldemort arrive. 

He needed no introduction as he appeared in the Black’s dining room. Though usually alone, he was accompanied this time by a massive Burmese Python. Voldemort’s once brown eyes now eerily similar to the snake’s. As he approached the table, not a sound could be heard aside from the soft slithering of the snake against the polished floors. It took all of Regulus’ effort to keep his shoulders back and chin up. For a child, he kept his wits about him better than half the adults in the room. 

“My lord,” Cygnus bowed at the waist, “you’ve arrived earlier than we expected.”

“Yet you were still able to clean up in time for my arrival.” Voldemort dragged one boney finger along the mantle which he stood in front of, “well done, Cygnus.”

“All credit for tidiness must go to Druella, of course.”

“Has she taken the place of your elf in all duties of your household?” Voldemort smirked at his own crude joke.

“Of course not, my lord,” Cygnus stammered.

Now bored, Voldemort replied, “I would hope not.”

He moved towards Bella, forcefully taking a fist full of her black curls and jerking her head back as he whispered something in her ear. Rodolphus went rigged as he watched another man handle his wife in such a way. Yet Regulus even noted the way Bella’s eyes fluttered shut and her throat bobbed at whatever heinous words were being spoken to her. It was a strong move, without a doubt. A message to everyone in the room that Voldemort could do whatever he pleased with no consequences. He could have had his way with Bellatrix right there in front of them all and nobody would dare to object. 

Voldemort shoved her aside by the head before turning his attention back to his guests. A cruel smile played on his lips, knowing damn well what he had done and what he was capable of doing. No one said a word as he approached Lucius, who was seated at Cissy’s right. The hand which had just been tangled in Bella’s hair clasped onto the seventh year’s shoulder.

“Lucius, it is time.”

Cissy didn’t look up from her hands neatly folded on the table as her fiance stood. 

“Michael, you too.” Voldemort motioned at Mulciber to rise.

Regulus and Robin shared a glance. He didn’t think either of them could stand to witness another butchering. Especially not of Lucius and Michael. Robin gave him a reassuring nod. She would have seen an untimely demise of her brother, Regulus was certain of that. For now, at least, they were safe. However, safe had different meanings to different people. 

The two boys followed Voldemort to the center of the room, where the snake was now coiled into a tight ball. 

“It brings me great pleasure to share with you the marking of two new loyal followers,” Voldemort began, “as some of you may know, it is a great privilege to prove oneself loyal to our cause. Potentia, pudicitia, et immortalitas. ”

Everyone repeated the phrase in unison. Everyone except Sirius.

“Though Michael Mulciber is young, he has fulfilled his task. With the help of a trusted classmate, Mulciber has produced a new curse meant to fatally harm one’s victim.”

Not opponent, not enemy. Victim. 

“We will not demonstrate the power of the curse today; however, I will note that its effects did purge a local muggle couple from this earth.”

No indication was made of whether or not Michael had used the spell himself or if Voldemort had simply tested it out. Neither option sat well with Regulus. 

“Lucius here has assisted me with a rather personal project, which requires no further details at this moment,” was all the Dark Lord had to say about Malfoy. 

“Congratulations are in order for these two. Roll up your left sleeves, would you?”

They both did as he asked.

Voldemort then commanded his snake, Nagini, to pierce the forearm of each boy. They hardly flinched, as Narcissa whisked away their pain. Regulus could see the tears well up in her eyes as she silently took the pain of both their bites. With his wand pointed to the two, now bleeding holes, Voldemort said the words once more.

“ Potentia, pudicitia, et immortalitas .”

A skull with a snake slithering from its open mouth appeared on their previously unblemished skin. The brand was black as night; its image Regulus was all too familiar with, as the coin in his pocket felt more like a dead weight. The coin had suddenly become a promise to each and every child it was given to. That mark, that dark mark, was now cemented into Regulus’ future. Regulus knew Robin and Sirius understood that, too. Yet when he looked at them, both were seemingly unafraid. Unbothered by the sight. 

Sirius had no intention of ever receiving that mark. 

Robin had already seen it happen to herself.

***

For the rest of the week Regulus endured Walburga’s daily visits. In hushed tones she praised him for his behavior at the manor, for setting such a good example. Over and over again she expressed how proud she was of him, how utterly perfect he was. As her hands ravaged his bare skin, she marveled at how her boy was quickly becoming a man. Walburga silently cried as she kissed him. Then she did the unthinkable, had gone farther than she ever had before. Regulus could do nothing but lay there on his back, face slack, and hands at his sides, as he watched his own mother move above him. He was stone solid, petrified as she worked. His body screamed at him to challenge her but he could do nothing. For five days straight he couldn’t do a thing as he was forcibly made to succumb to the chemical nature of his own body. Over and over and over again. 

Regulus spent the entire day before Hogwarts vomiting and crying into his bathtub.

***

May 25, 1974

The rest of the month passed in a blur. As did most of the following month. Regulus' own 13th birthday came and went with very little excitement, or at least excitement he could recall. There was no mention of what had happened at the Black Manor. No mention of the cursed vaults. Nobody bothered Regulus per Robin’s orders, though he hardly even noticed. He only made it through those few weeks, because Robin and Pandora had been doing all his work for him. Quidditch practices still went on, at which he’d claim lack of sleep for his poor performance. That wasn’t entirely a lie. 

So when the Quidditch House Cup rolled around, there was good reason for everyone to be worried. This year, Slytherin was up against Ravenclaw and they were sure to not hold any punches. Regulus couldn’t afford to be tired, to zone out, to lose himself. But he just couldn’t help it.

“Let me speak to him,” Pandora’s voice could be heard from just outside his bedroom door.

“He hasn’t spoken to anyone in days,” Evan argued, “what makes you think you’re any different?”

“Rose, let her in,” Robin pressed.

Regulus tuned them out after that. 

A few moments passed before the door slowly creaked open. Through it emerged Pandora, wringing her hands like the child she was. So very slowly she approached Regulus’ bed and got down on her knees before him.

“Today is the Quidditch Cup, don’t you think you should get up?” She asked sweetly.

Regulus only shrugged, his eyes void of any emotion.

“Reg, you’re really starting to worry us. I need you to get out of bed now. I need you to,” Pandora pleaded, “as your very first friend, I need you to get out of this bed and to do what you do best. I need you to be a know-it-all and mean and stubborn. I need you to make fun of Evan and threaten Barty and laugh with Romilda. I need you to have your weird little study dates with Robin even though it kills me to be excluded. I need you to get up and be my friend, Reggie. My friend! Because even when you stop being mine, I never, never, stop being yours.”

The tears were flowing freely now. 

“Regulus Black you get out of this bed right now before I curse myself! I’d threaten to curse you, but you’d only think that you deserve it.”

Pandora pulled out her wand and positioned it just beneath her own chin. 

That certainly caught Regulus’ attention. 

Eyes blown wide, he snatched the wand from her grip, “if you ever even attempt something as stupid as that again, I-”

“You’ll what , Regulus Black? Send yourself into a Merlin’s damned coma?” Pandora hollered. 

He blinked once at her.

“Now that you’re back in your stupid right mind,” Pandora smacked him over the head.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Regulus threw up his arms to protect himself, “you wouldn’t be hitting me right now if you knew what I’ve been through, Dora!”

The witch’s sobs intensified, “I’m sorry, Reg. I’m just so scared. You scared me!”

Wrapping his arms around Pandora’s shoulders, Regulus didn’t shutter at the feeling of her body pressed against his. He held his friend as tightly as he could until her tears came to a stop. He breathed in her scent. She smelled flowery and alive. When he pulled back Pandora smiled sweetly up at him, her blue eyes bloodshot. 

“I have a bet placed with Xeno. You need to win today, Reg.”

So he did. Not for the glory or the recognition. Not for his team, or even for himself. Regulus went out on the quidditch pitch that day and won the Slytherin Quidditch House Cup for none other than Pandora Burke.

***

June 14, 1974

The final few weeks at Hogwarts flew by with forced enjoyment. There were very few moments Regulus truly enjoyed, as every second of the day he was reminded of what he’d soon be returning to. He had no way out. He wasn’t like Sirius, he wasn’t able to defy Walburga and Orion. Regulus’ fear of rejection and abandonment outweighed the very real need he had to get out of that house. There was nothing he could do except take the punches. Take the punches and move on. Live as if none of that was happening behind closed doors. Live as if his mother didn’t sully him day in and day out. Regulus had no other choice than to go on as he currently was.

Chapter Text

June 1974

Spirits were high as the Hogwarts Express pulled into Kings Cross. At least they were for everyone except Regulus. Walburga awaited him and Sirius on the platform. They were smart enough this time to not speak to anyone as they approached their mother. She was shrouded in dark green Summer robes, her hair pinned up neatly. She barely looked at her sons, didn’t even mutter a greeting, before apparating them home. 

Regulus was expecting an argument, a punishment, anything negative. Yet, Walburga quickly left them in the entryway of Grimmauld Place before stalking off down the hall. Sirius and Regulus exchanged a weary look - something wasn’t right. 

“Well,” Sirius clasped his hands together, “I have some vandalism to tend to.”

Trunk in hand, Sirius bounded up the stairs. Regulus sighed and trudged up after him. It was sure to be a long holiday. 

***

Three weeks into the Summer holiday, Regulus received an owl from Narcissa. She was requesting Regulus and Sirius to meet her in Diagon Alley in two days time. There were no other instructions. Regulus hadn’t heard a thing from any of his friends. They’d all gotten instructions from Lucius before leaving Hogwarts to limit communications and remain obedient to the Dark Lord. As if Regulus would do anything to negatively draw attention to himself. 

He was committed to uncovering Elladora’s secrets that Summer in order to return to Hogwarts with a complete translation of her journal. Regulus knew Robin would continue her research on Secrets of The Darkest Art. He believed in her ability to get what she needed out of the text, but worried about what it would get from her. The risk of writing to her about it wasn’t warranted. Somehow, Regulus was sure that they should have never found it. The book was dangerous beyond measure. Simply thinking of it made Regulus shiver.

After extensive consideration, Regulus showed Sirius the letter from Cissy. Sirius didn’t think anything suspicious of the note and suspected Walburga would let them go. In the end, Regulus crafted a very short confirmation and sent it back. Walburga had barely nodded when they’d gone to ask her if they could go. She’d been sitting for her portrait when they approached her; the witch painting her was from Paris and only spoke to them in French. Regulus hadn’t realized he’d be tested in his second language that Summer. 

Regulus and Sirius took the floo network to Diagon Alley early that same afternoon. Cissy’s note hadn’t told them where exactly to go. Seeing as crowds were light and the air hot, the boys found themselves at Fortescue’s. They lounged on the wiry cream colored chairs outside the shop, lapping up their frozen treats. Weary looks were cast their way, though Sirius didn’t seem to notice. The older boy had ice cream running down his hands and chin. Regulus rolled his eyes and sneered. His brother behaved like a dog. Though Regulus supposed that was fitting. 

From across the alleyway, Narcissa came bounding forward. Her cheeks were rosy, as if she had spent too much time in the sun and a wide smile stretched across her lips. Regulus was stunned to find her in muggle clothing. A baby blue dress with a white collar stopped mid-thigh and buttoned up the front. The capped sleeves were slightly puffed and trimmed in white lace. Narcissa’s long legs were enhanced by a set of heeled sandals. A wide brimmed straw hat was tilted slightly upon her blonde head. She was radiant as ever. 

“Cissy!” Regulus exclaimed as both boys jumped to their feet.

Sirius struggled to clean himself up before throwing his arms around Narcissa. The three embraced before the masses, Regulus not caring who stared at him now. He had missed Narcissa dearly. He breathed in the scent of her; flowery and clean. She was so unlike the rest of their family.

“Oh, my boys!” Narcissa pulled away to examine them both. 

Though she was smiling, there was a bit of sorrow in her gray eyes.

“How have you been faring these past few weeks?” She inquired.

“Fine.” Regulus shrugged.

“I plastered my walls in half naked muggle girls and Walburga still hasn’t noticed!” Sirius was beaming, “I used a permanent sticking charm!”

Narcissa sighed and sucked in her lips. 

Ignoring Sirius’ comment, Narcissa declared, “We’re seeing Andy today.”

Sirius’ jaw fell open, while Regulus’ eyes grew wide. Narcissa did not give either boy time to question her. She grabbed each of their hands and smiled mischievously before the crack of apparition sounded through Diagon Alley.

***

Andromeda and Ed Tonks lived along the river in King’s Lynn. A portion of their home was designated as a bed and breakfast, with three average sized rooms to board travelers. The home was built of sturdy orange bricks and had great big white framed windows that looked out onto the water. The cobblestone walkway to the front entrance was worn flat with age and lined with daffodils - Narcissus flowers. 

The front door opened just as Regulus, Sirius, and Cissy appeared on the walkway. Andy stood at the threshold, a baby girl on her hip. Regulus recalled the last time he’d seen his cousin, on his birthday two years prior. She looked exactly the same, save for the purple half moons beneath her eyes and the thinning of her face. Regulus supposed they now looked more alike than ever. A long denim skirt clung to her waist, paired with a green striped blouse. Even after leaving Hogwarts, Andy still looked best in Slytherin green.   

It was a good thing Ted had appeared to take Nymphadora from her mother, as Sirius flew across the yard and pounced on Andromeda like the feral dog he was. Andy squealed with delight as she wrapped her arms around Sirius’ shoulders. Regulus hadn’t realized how short Andy was compared to the rest of their family. Regulus was taller than Sirius, and Sirius appeared to only be a few centimeters shorter than their cousin. He had always pictured Andy so tall and mature, wise beyond her years. Yet, before him stood a girl of just twenty-one years. 

Hand in hand, Regulus and Narcissa approached the house. Narcissa was radiating a cool and calming demeanor over Regulus, though he suspected she was trying to ease her own nerves. He was certain Cissy hadn’t seen her sister since the winter holiday. Andy released her grasp on Sirius, tears streaming down her freckled cheeks. She reached for Regulus wordlessly and hugged him close. Her face fit in the crook of his neck, where he could feel the wetness of her eyes. They’d both changed so much since they had last seen each other. 

“You’re almost a grown man, Reggie. I hardly recognized you.” Andy sniffed.

Regulus stiffened at her words and pulled away slowly, “you’re still young as ever, Andy.”

His cousin laughed through her tears and punched his shoulder playfully. She reached for Narcissa next; the two girls held each other tight as if they would never see each other again. Cissy’s eyes were clenched shut, as if she were in pain.

“Let’s go inside, shall we? I’ve just put on the kettle.” Andy whipped her eyes and gestured to the open door. 

Yellow and green tactile wallpaper adored the interior walls and a dark orange carpet clung to the dark hardwood floors. The space was so unlike Grimmauld Place and Black Manor, that Regulus wondered briefly if Andy had suffered from a strong memory charm. Nobody would suspect that this was the home of Andromeda Black. They were invited to recline on the low seated brown sofa. Music from a wood-framed turntable played softly, warming the already very homey space. 

Brandy wears a braided chain made of the finest silver from the north of Spain.

Andy swayed in time to the music as she poured them each a cup of tea. Her brown hair fell in waves over her shoulders. She was nearly as angelic as Cissy. Regulus wondered how Narcissa and Andromeda had grown to be such pleasant women, when Bella was positively mad.

A small television sat in the corner caught Regulus’ attention. He had never seen one before. Seeing as this was not his house, he made no move to inspect the muggle technology. He sat firmly in his seat, his shoulders squared. Regulus smoothed his summer robes across his knees, suddenly feeling out of place. Perhaps he should have done without the robes altogether, opting for simple brown trousers and a collared shirt.        

Upon the mantle were almost a dozen picture frames. Some of the photos were of Ted and his family, though many of them were of Andy, Cissy, and Bella. There was even a photo of Andy and Sirius, he couldn’t have been much older than eight. There was not a single photo of Regulus. He hadn’t expected there to be; he and Andy had never been as close as she and Sirius and he had no recollection of taking a photograph with her. Still, the lack of photo evidence of any bond he and Andromeda shared bothered him. A sense of jealousy bubbled within Regulus. Once again, Sirius had something Regulus would never be able to obtain.

“Thank you for taking the time to come visit.” Andy seated herself in a sage green armchair. 

“I’m happy that none of us were all too busy. I was quite eager to get out of the house.” Narcissa sipped at her tea.

“It has been far too long.” Andy clasped her hands together. “So, tell me, how has Hogwarts been treating my favorite cousins?”

“I nearly rival the Prewitt twins with most consecutive detentions in a given year,” Sirius announced proudly. 

Regulus glared at his brother before returning his gaze to Andy, responding proudly, “I’m Slytherin’s best seeker in nearly a decade.”

“Cissy tells me you’re very fond of charms and history, is that correct?” Andy mused.

Regulus nodded.

“Those were my favorite subjects, too. What are your electives for next year?”

“Care of Magical Creatures, Study of Ancient Runes, and Arithmancy.”

Sirius wrinkled his nose, “boring subjects, if you ask me. Muggle Studies is brilliant!” 

Regulus didn’t need another reason for Walburga to smite him. Muggle studies would be the very last class he’d enroll in. Andy smiled at Sirius, saying without words that she agreed with him. Ted then came out with a tray of biscuits in one hand, and Nymphadora in the other. When Nymphador’s gaze fell upon Regulus, her hair turned black and curly, her dark brown eyes lightened to gray. Regulus’ mouth fell open in astonishment. Cissy had told him the girl was a metamorphmagus, but seeing her abilities in person was entirely different than hearing about it. Andromeda reached out for her daughter and settled the baby on her lap, bounding her knee slightly. 

“Isn’t she darling?” Andy gushed.

“She’s perfect,” Narcissa said softly. “I can’t wait for the day I have a child of my own.”

“You are so young, Cissy. Please, don’t rush into anything.”

Narcissa let out a startling snort, “you’re one to talk, Andy. Running off with a mudblood, leaving your family behind, and marrying before you even turned twenty-one!”

The words rushed out before she could stop herself. Ted’s long face reddened with embarrassment. With shaking hands, Narcissa clumsily set her teacup on its saucer. Andromeda pursed her lips, but did not say anything. Sirius and Regulus both watched through widened eyes, waiting for someone to speak.

“I’m very sorry,” Narcissa spoke in barely a whisper, “that was horribly dreadful for me to say.”

“Yes, it was,” Andromeda agreed. “But I understand. You were raised to believe many lies, Cissy. As were the two of you.”

Regulus was unsettled by this accusation. Surely, mudbloods weren’t as awful as his mother claimed, but they certainly weren’t as well-bred or dignified as purebloods. He never understood why Andy had thrown away her entire life, her fortune and good standing, for someone as simple as Ted Tonks. He was nobody. Worse, he was a nobody with dirty blood. 

Sirius nodded earnestly, as if Andromeda had spoken some grand truth. Regulus didn’t so much as blink. 

“You were raised the same as me,” Narcissa argued.

“And we were both raised the same as Bella.” Andy snorted, “you see how well she turned out! Mother and father must be so proud .” A bitterness that Regulus had never heard from Andy poisoned her words. 

Narcissa squared her shoulders. “Bellatrix is doing what she believes is best for our family and our community. As am I.”

Andromeda raised an eyebrow, “is that so?” 

Cissy took in a shaky breath. “I am not here to talk about myself. You requested to see Sirius and Regulus, and here they are.”

“Indeed,” Andy responded stiffly before forcing a smile upon her lips. She stood and adjusted Nymphadora on her hip. From a nearby bookshelf, Andy produced two packages. She gave one to Sirius and one to Regulus. The box was wrapped in thick brown paper and was almost weightless. Andy nodded to each of them, encouraging the boys to open their respective gifts. 

Beneath the paper, Regulus found a black velvet box. Within was a massive emerald pendant. The stone was oval and surrounded by diamonds, with small onyx stones nestled in between. The pendant hung from a thick silver chain, studded with smaller emeralds. The piece was grand and exquisite, but he had no use for such a thing. The necklace was very clearly made for a lady. 

“My last Black family heirloom,” Andy noted. 

Regulus peered up at his cousin with questioning eyes. 

“Cissy and Bella have matching pieces, each one having been passed down for generations. It’s been years since I’ve worn it. I no longer ascribe to the Black family motto. Toujours Pur. I am no longer pure, and neither is my daughter. It would be a shame to let such a beautiful bit of jewelry go unworn. One day, I hope you find a nice girl and this necklace shall be a wonderful gift for her.” 

Without thinking, Regulus imagined Robin wearing this necklace. The image came to him clear as day, nearly startling him. He shook the idea from his mind. It was absurd. Regulus mumbled a small thanks, and closed the lid of the box. He wondered how many family heirlooms he was sure to collect over the course of his life. To his left, Sirius was gazing into a silver handheld mirror. Just what he needs, something to ogle at himself with.

“Two-way mirrors.” Andromeda sat back in her chair with an amused arrogance. Her facial expressions and mannerisms certainly gave away the fact that she was Black. 

Sirius leaned across Narcissa, passing a mirror to Regulus. When he looked into the glass, he saw Sirius staring back at him. What a fascinating bit of magic!

“Ted and I used them to communicate while we were in school. I couldn’t be caught dead speaking to a muggle born wizard, now could I?”

Sirius stuck his tongue out at Regulus, nearly licking the mirror in the process. Regulus groaned, handing the mirror back to his brother. Narcissa sat stock still as the gifts were presented, not commenting on the fact that Andy was giving up what was assumed to be prized possessions. It might have been better for her to sell such items, rather than give them away so freely to a couple of children. 

“These are brilliant!” Sirius exclaimed, “I can’t wait to show James.”

Regulus bit his tongue and clenched his fists to the point of his knuckles whitening. 

“Regulus?” Andy spoke his name so sweetly, “Would you like to hold her?”

Before he could answer, Nymphadora was in his arms. Regulus had never held a baby before. He’d only really seen babies out in public, in their mother’s arms or asleep in buggies. His heart beat rapidly, unsure of what to do with her. Nymphadora smiled up at him, all gums and no teeth. Her eyes remained a deep brown, though her hair turned a vibrant pink.

“That means she likes you,” Andy noted.

“My friend Pandora Burke is a metamorphmagus. Her hair often turns pink when she’s happy, too.” 

“I am not very familiar with metamorphmagi. Maybe one day when Dora is older your friend can teach her a thing or two. It would be nice for Dora to have someone to look up to and learn from.”

Regulus nodded, now fully captivated by the tiny fist wrapped around his finger. He knew he had once been as small as Dora (everyone started off that way), but he could not imagine himself as a baby fully reliant on his mother’s love. Worse, he wondered how his mother could look at such an innocent child and do unspeakable things to it. Reluctantly, he handed Nymphadora to Sirius. His mind was overwhelmed with imagined scenes of his mother caring for himself and Sirius as infants. Did she care for us then? Were we a burden? An obligation? How could Walburga have given us Narcissa so easily?

At some point, they had said their goodbyes. Regulus walked down the cobblestone path without really seeing it. The sun was beginning to set, the moon beginning to loom overhead. The evening air was brisk as a cool breeze from the river swept by them. Cissy took each of their hands and brought them directly to the step of 12 Grimmauld Place. 

***

July 1974

In the following weeks, Walburga had been almost nonexistent. She sat for her portrait every Monday, took tea with Druella on Thursdays, was present for supper every evening, but essentially vanished all the time in between. Regulus wasn’t complaining, nor was Sirius. By mid July, Regulus had received correspondence from Robin. The note was brief, simply stating how boring her holiday had been thus far and how she longed to see him and return to Hogwarts. Regulus responded with a similar sentiment. While he penned his response, the image of Robin wearing Andy’s pendant flooded his mind. He couldn’t shake how the image heated his skin and made his heart stutter. For good measure, Regulus had stashed the box on the highest shelf of his closest, all the way in the back. He never wanted to think of it again. 

For weeks, Regulus kept to his room. Grimmauld Place was unnaturally quiet. There were no unexpected guests, no curses being thrown down hallways, and no nightly visits from Walburga. Regulus took the newly acquired freedom to study Elladora’s journal. It was difficult to decipher what directly corresponded with the vaults and what was a simple narration of her daily life. There were some entries in which Regulus ought to have left private. He learned that great auntie Ella had been unmarried due to her unseemly carnal behavior, and had been childless due to being naturally barren. She described in great detail the times she took both muggle men and wizards to bed. Regulus couldn’t help but continue reading. All he had ever known was the actions performed upon himself. The deeds which Elladora had committed far surpassed Regulus’ imagination. The whole ordeal was even more shocking, as she wrote in the second person. He was very glad to have not come across such passages in Robin’s presence; he was sure the shame of it all would have ruined him. 

Between all the very detailed lewd bits, were seemingly meaningless nonsense. Regulus knew that the first vault was ice. He learned from Elladora’s journal that the other four were the vault of fear, the forest vault, the buried vault, and the sunken vault. He deduced that the vault of fear had something to do with the library, but Elladora’s writing had been badly smudged. When Regulus wasn’t reading the journal, he was constantly thinking about it. He hated himself for being curious about the sexual details Elladora described in her book. Regulus burned with shame every time he acted upon such thoughts. He was sick with a desire he could hardly fulfill on his own. Though nobody knew except him, of course. Regulus intended to keep it that way.

***

August 1974

Regulus awoke one morning in early August to glass shattering and shouting coming from downstairs. He met Sirius in the hall, neither of them said a word as they raised down the stairs. They both halted before entering the kitchen, where Orinion was shouting obscenities. It sounded as if he were throwing dishes and glasses against the walls. Sirius flinched every time an object shattered. 

“Who did this, woman! I know damn well it was not me.” Orion bellowed. 

Walburga cried hysterically, “Orion, stop! I swear-”

“I haven’t fucked you in over a year!” 

Regulus and Sirius both flinched at the sound of Orinion striking Walburga across the face. The slap sounded wet either with blood or tears - perhaps both.

“Was it Rosier?”

Walburga whimpered.

“Mulciber, maybe?”

“No, no. Orion it wasn’t either of them, stop!”

“Well, you fucked someone who wasn’t me! Your belly proves it. Whose bastard child do you carry?” 

Sirius and Regulus both widened their eyes. Walburga’s pregnant. 

An eerie calm fell over Grimmauld Place, as if the entire house was realizing some horrible secret. Walburga cried gently as Orion’s heavy steps moved across the kitchen. He seemed to be mumbling to himself, though his words weren’t easily heard. Regulus felt as if he were experiencing deja vu. He’d been younger, weaker the last time he witnessed Orion assault his mother.

“Tell me it’s not Regulus.” Orion did not phrase this statement as a question, but more as a command. “Tell me.”  

Sirius narrowed his brow in confusion, trying to make sense of his father’s accusation. Regulus wanted to deny it, wanted to assure Sirius that it wasn’t true, that Walburga would never do such a thing. But she had done such a thing, and Sirius knew this. Tears pricked the back of Regulus’ eyes. Walburga’s silence, her lack of denial only confirmed what they all knew to be true. Walburga Black was indeed pregnant and had found herself in such a state because she sought out her youngest son. Her perfect boy. 

“I ought to kill you,” Orion said all too calmly. 

“No, please don’t,” Walburga wailed.

“The Dark Lord would not be pleased if we began killing our own.” Orion spat on the floor. “Instead I will kill the abomination within your womb and we will never speak of this again.”

“You mustn't! Let me keep her, please!”

“ Crucio !”

Walburga screamed.

Regulus could no longer hold back his tears. He and Sirius were both silently crying. Their mother screamed in agony as their father screamed in fury. 

“You bitch!” Orion’s voice cracked as he continued to force the cruciatus curse upon his wife. Regulus heard his father fall to his knees and cry. 

Regulus stepped forward, intending to enter the kitchen, but Sirius held his arm out. His older brother shook his head, his face hardened with rage. In one quick motion, Sirius threw his arms around Regulus, nearly crushing him. It was then Regulus’ silent tears turned into sobs. He muffled his cries against Sirius’ shoulder. 

“I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again, Reggie,” Sirius whispered, “never again.”

The promise was nice in theory, though Regulus knew Sirius was unable to perform such a miracle. After a few moments, Orion’s footsteps moved across the creaky floors. Regulus and Sirius scrambled inside the closest broom closet, its door having already been left ajar. Through the crack, Regulus watched as Orion dragged his feet up the stairs. His hands were covered in blood. Regulus’ lip quivered as he fought the urge to break down in tears once more. Sirius gently opened the door after Orion had made it up the stairs and into his own bedchamber. 

The two boys tiptoed their way into the kitchen, to find Walburga sprawled out on the floor. A massive puddle of blood pooled around her, stemming from her lower abdomen. Kreacher was already there, with a bucket and sponge, soaking up the mess Orion made. 

“Kreacher, help her!” Regulus shouted, pointing at his mother.

“Mistress ordered Kreacher to clean up the blood.”

Walburga’s eyes slowly drifted towards Regulus, all light diminished. 

“I will live,” she said bitterly, as if she didn’t want it to be true.

Sirius’ fists clenched at his sides. He believed Walburga hadn’t received enough punishment, Regulus was certain. All the blood, Regulus realized, had come from his mother’s womb. The child she carried, the child he had sired, was dead. Though he only knew about its existence for a moment, Regulus was overwhelmed with dread. Of course, he hadn’t wanted any of this to happen, but knowing that Walburga had been secretly carrying his offspring for five months left a horrible taste in his mouth. His chest ached with grief, either for himself or the unborn, he wasn’t sure. At least, he knew it wasn’t for Walburga. 

Father should have killed you , he wanted to say. Instead, Regulus turned on his heel and walked right out the front door. Nobody stopped him.  

Chapter Text

August 1974

Regulus walked all the way to the Leaky Cauldron. The walk had cleared his mind. At first, he wasn’t entirely sure where he was going. He just needed to get out of that house. Regulus’ tears evaporated in the summer heat, though his anger still raged within him. Curious eyes watched him as he entered the pub alone. Nobody approached him or spoke in his general direction. He threw a handful of sickles on the bar, asking for floo powder in return. The barmaid seemed concerned for him, but she did not question his request. Regulus took a handful of the powder from the nondescript jar held out to him and stepped into the blazing green hearth. 

“Burke manor.” Regulus threw the powder at his feet and was immediately engulfed by the flames.

In a blink, he was standing in the Burke’s dining room. Prometheus and Pandora were seated at the table, breakfast laid out before them. Pandora’s silver spoon clattered to the table, her hair changed to a shimmering blue, as she took in the sight of Regulus before her.

“Black? What on earth are you doing here?” Prometheus nearly shouted.

Regulus fumbled for an answer. He had needed to get away from Grimmauld Place, and his feet had brought him to Burke manor. The truth was not worth putting into words. Regulus’ lip quivered. Looking down at his hands, he realized he was still in his pajamas. No wonder he’d received so many odd looks. His silk black and green striped pants and white cotton shirt was surely a most peculiar sight to muggles and wizards alike. Regulus refused to take his eyes off the fuzzy black house slippers he’d arrived in. Embarrassed by his appearance and his intrusion of the Burke household, Regulus burst into tears.  

Pandora was on him in an instant. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders, her hands gently soothing his back. Regulus cried into her shoulder, the humiliation of all he had witnessed and endured that morning poured out of him. Pandora murmured words of encouragement and shushed him softly. He wasn’t sure how long they stood there for. Though it had to have been long enough for Prometheus to return with clean robes and a cup of tea. 

Pulling himself together, Regulus changed in the nearby powder room. He avoided his reflection; he knew he’d see his parents staring back at him if he looked hard enough. Regulus splashed cold water upon his face before returning to the dining room. His pajamas were neatly folded in his arms. Pandora took the bundle of clothes graciously, gesturing for him to take a seat across from her brother. On the plate before him, Regulus was surprised to find sausage, eggs, and toast prepared exactly how he liked it. Pandora was an angel sent for him alone. 

The three Sytherins ate in silence. Regulus forced himself to eat slowly, unsure as to what would come next upon finishing his meal. He’d have to give Pandora some sort of explanation for bursting into her home unannounced before the sun had hardly risen. He couldn’t come up with a single excuse. 

They were nearing the end of their meal as the floo network came ablaze. Through the green flames, Robin appeared. Regulus wondered if this was how startled Pandora had felt when he arrived. His mouth was instantly dry, his nerves firing in all directions. Robin had traded her thick, boxy glasses for thin, round frames. Her bangs had grown out, though the length of her hair was cut just above her shoulders. A pale green summer robe hung loosely over a short black dress. She carried a terrifyingly calm demeanor, but Regulus could easily recognize the fury in her dark eyes. 

“I came as soon as I could,” Robin said as she embraced Pandora tightly.

Regulus scrambled to his feet, “How did you know?”

“I sent her an owl while you were changing.” Pandora blushed.

Robin wrapped her arms around Regulus’ middle, her head lightly resting on his chest. He did not hesitate to hug her back. She smelled of citrus and dittany. 

“But I saw you,” Robin whispered, “not everything, but I saw you in distress.”

An imaginative fist clenched Regulus’ heart. 

“Let’s go speak in the library, shall we?” Pandora extended a hand, which Robin took delicately. 

Regulus followed close behind the two girls as they exited the dining room and strolled down the long corridor. Prometheus hadn’t given them the slightest bit of interest, being entirely consumed by the quidditch section of the Daily Prophet. The manor was terribly quiet and a bit too warm. Regulus pulled at his collar. 

“Dora, are you parents home?” He inquired.

“They are on holiday.” Pandora answered all too quickly.

When they reached the library, Pandora shut the door hastily behind them. Regulus felt as if he were back at Malfoy manor, being cornered by the two girls. Befriending a seer and an empath should have made him more aware. He should have known they were going to find out eventually.

“Sit.” Regulus motioned towards a large green velvet sofa.

Pandora was the image of elegance. Her hands were firmly clasped in her lap, her shoulders straight as an arrow. She forced her facial muscles to reflex, though Regulus could see the concern in her eyes. Her pink lace robes cascaded around her small frame. Robin, on the other hand, had reclined on the sofa. Her arms stretched across the back and one knee was crossed over the other. They could not have been more different. 

Regulus paced awkwardly, unable to form a cohesive thought. 

“I have not been honest with either of you.”

Robin snorted, then mumbled a quick apology after Pandora slapped her leg. 

“You know that my mother-” A lump formed in Regulus’ throat. “You know that she has done some terrible things.”

Pandora nodded her head earnestly.

“Since Sirius began at Hogwarts, she has been- she has been…” Regulus couldn’t go on; he broke down into a fit of sobs once more. 

“I don’t know how to tell you!” He choked out, gasping for air.

Pandora and Robin were both silently crying. Whatever Regulus had endured, they knew it was worse than the occasional beating or curse which Sirius was accustomed to. Regulus buried his face in his hands, the shame too much to bear. 

“I’m afraid of what you will think if I tell you,” Regulus admitted.

“Reggie, we love you. We would never think less of you for something that is out of your control,” Pandora spoke sweetly. 

“I can’t even admit it to myself.” Regulus hung his head.

“It’s okay, Black. You don’t have to.” Robin’s tone surprised him. 

The witch had hardly been affectionate at Hogwarts; her mood constantly varying. She had always been a bit hard on Regulus, her disposition typically demanding and harsh. Sure, Robin cared for Regulus, but she had a funny way of showing it. It caught Regulus off guard to see her firm exterior crumble. 

“I will,” Regulus announced, “just not today.”

Pandora and Robin nodded in solidarity. A long, heavy silence settled over the library. The quiet allowed Regulus’ thoughts to wander; images of his morning played over again in his mind. He couldn’t shut it off. Regardless of if his eyes were open or closed, everything he had seen was burned into his mind. Regulus’ breakfast churned in his stomach. He looked around frantically for a bin, and having not found one quickly enough, he promptly emptied the contents of his stomach into the fireplace. Robin and Pandora gasped in equal surprise and concern. 

Doubled over, Regulus waved his hand in an attempt to pass off his sudden sickness. His friends were not fools. He could feel Pandora’s weariness and Robin’s justified fury radiating from them. Oddly enough, Regulus began to feel guilty. He hadn’t meant to put them in such a position; to make them worry unnecessarily. 

“I shouldn’t have bothered you.” Regulus straightened. “I should go home.”

Pandora’s eyes were wide, “no, you could never bother me, Reggie! Won’t you stay a bit longer?”

“I don’t mean to impose.” He blushed violently and stammered, “I’d come here without really thinking. I just needed time to breathe.”

He wiped the corners of his mouth with the back of his hand. Sweat began to bead upon his forehead. Loose stands of his growing curls clung to his face and neck.

“There’s no reason for you to go home yet, Black. Why don’t we find something to do?” Robin habitually tucked long strands of hair behind her ears.

Regulus shook his head, “I shouldn’t have left Sirius behind.”

“He can handle himself,” Robin responded sternly, “he’s probably at Potter’s by now.”

Regulus couldn’t argue that, but the guilt ate away at him, nonetheless.

“I think I would just like some peace,” Regulus finally admitted.

Pandora lit up, her hair turning a slight pink, as the control on her powers slipped. “We can lay in the garden! I just received a new muggle book from my cousin in America, that is all the rage. It’s scandalous! I shall read it aloud.”

The excitement radiating from Pandora was too bright to dismiss. Robin looked uncertain as Pandora flew from the library and clamored up the stairs to her bedroom. Regulus was in no position to argue, and had no energy left as it was. When Robin’s skeptical look fell upon him, Regulus straightened his spine.

“What?” He asked innocently.

Robin’s eyes narrowed. “Are you still with us, Black?”

“Pardon?”

“You’re not going to float away and leave us again, are you?” Robin stuck out her chin, though Regulus could see the slight tremble of her bottom lip. 

He stared at Robin’s mouth as he answered sternly, “No. No, I am not leaving you, Robin. You are where I want to be.”

Regulus shocked himself with the candidness of his words. Admitting out loud that he was not going to turn in on himself, that Robin was what was keeping him present, allowed a great weight to be lifted from his heart. He smirked at the sound of his own poetic declaration; proud himself for stunning Robin into silence. She was no longer appraising him with hard eyes. Robin’s entire face had softened, a slight blush rose to her pale cheeks. Silently, she approached him, but stopped just inches from his face.

“May I suggest a breath mint, Black?” Robin held out her open palm, in which was a small mint colored boiled sweet. 

Regulus’ face flared with heat as Robin placed the candy in his hand and left the room. Pandora was already coming down the stairs, a small book clasped in her hands. Regulus popped the mint in his mouth, savoring the cool spice. Wordlessly, he followed the girls outside, where he was led to a short cluster of carefully manicured shrubs. A patch of bright green grass sat in the middle of the shrubs, undisturbed. A variety of pink and purple flowers trailed their path to the open lawn and were nestled between the rows of bushes. The sun had risen to almost noon and small puffy clouds dotted the sky. Pandora took a brown linen from under her arm and fanned it out over the grass. They each took a seat, spreading themselves out. For a moment, Regulus felt as if he were back in the Slytherin common room, about to begin studying. He longed to return to school. 

“I’ve already read the first few pages,” Pandora announced, “Would you like me to start from the beginning, or just keep going?”

Robin waved her hand, indicating she had no preference. Regulus simply laid back and tucked his hands behind his head. With a shrug, Pandora opened the book to where she had marked her spot with a black satin ribbon, and began to read. Within minutes, Regulus was sound asleep.