Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

~~Centross POV~~

"Aha, very funny Chaos, you can- you can get up now!" 

"Chaos... Chaos please-"

"Chaos please be alive- I didn't mean to hurt you!"

"Chaos!-"

Their choked breathing came to a stop, an ending to what I never wanted to end. I never needed it to end. 

What did I do to break the contract? What did I do to make them attack me? What did I do? Who did I hurt? I didn't anyone! Did I hurt someone from existing?

I felt my breathing becomed staggered, and I just realized the hot, salty tears reopening the scars on my face. I don't know where to go, who to tell, what to do. I could go to Ocie- wait no, she'll only believe that I murdered Chaos in cold blood... Then again, she should know, I mean, it's Chaos's fiance afterall. 

Racking my brain for anything to make sense, every thought coming and going in a matter of milliseconds. Why did she attack me..? What did- who-...

Grabbing the rockets that remained in my bag, I flew back to spawn. I can't tell anyone. Well, maybe I could tell Rae? Maybe he'd understand? 

The air pushing against me as I fly, making the tears evaporate only to be replaced. So long, my wings are tired, my body aches, my heart would probably feel better if it just stopped. 


Crashing onto Rae's doorstep I frantically knock, it was near night and I nearly expected no answer. However, a tired and confused Rae opened the door. Immediately I collapsed, everything was too much to handle. I couldn't remember how to stand- how to think- how to lie. He asks me what was wrong. What's wrong? Everything was wrong. 

"I killed... I killed Chaos." I managed to finally choke out between dioriented breaths and harsh tears. 

"What?..."

"She- She attacked me and I- I just wanted her to stop Rae! I didn't know what to do!"

He shushes me, holding me tighter, eventually pulling me inside from the nearly set sun. Oranges fade as a door closes and I'm still against Rae's body. I explain everything in great detail, my rant becoming nearly unintelligable. Again, he holds me tight, pulling me closer and telling me to take it slow. He said, he said he needs to know what happened so he can help me. I want him to help me so badly... My guilt finally catching up as I realize...


Oh

I did it again

I hurt someone I cared so much about

Again


I can't stop myself from sobbing harder, losing the dignity that I didn't even deserve. I want it to all dissapear, let the world dissapate into nothing but ashes. I can't believe what I did, why do I have to be who I am? All I want to know is why. WHY ANY OF THIS?

I didn't even notice how close Rae was holding me, shushing me calmly, I could tell he was also crying...

I made him cry... 

Was it my fault? Did I hurt him again?

Eventually, a realm of nightmares pulls me from my state of consciousness. One last phrase can be heard fall from the silent sobbing from Rae,


"Everything gone to waste, because of a promise he didn't even break."

Chapter Text

~~Centross POV~~

I woke up on a bed of stones, a bed of comforting hell. It wasn't really stones, just my guilt made the bed rugged. I had no idea what to do anymore, I wish I could lay here and rot into a arduous oblivion.

Sooner or later the door opens, and I realize Rae had moved me from his arms as I see his face peeking through the door frame.

"Hey David, you doing okay?" He asked concerned. I hate that I made him concerned. All I manage is a grunt in response; I don't even know what I mean and Rae somehow deciphers it for me.

"I know, it'll be okay though, promise." He starts before heaving a concerned sigh and then continuing, "I made breakfast, you need to eat." He doesn't even give me time to decline breakfast, so without responding I slowly move out of bed. Though, it feels like weighted shackles are attached to my ankles. Rae notices my struggle and lightly grabs my wrist, smiling while he leads me to the kitchen to eat. 

"Ha, the table is still here..." I comment while trailing off, I don't deserve those memories of happiness. 

"Got too tired to get rid of it, plus it's proven useful!" The shorter responds, giggling slightly. 

I sit down in the chair closest to me so I don't have to move much anymore. Rae grabs the pancakes he made and sets them down before the both of us, then takes his seat across from me. We eat in silence, sharing a few glances. His being glances of worry and concern, mine being ones of guilt. I don't understand how he could care for me, after everything I've done to not only him but everyone. He seems so perfect sitting there, so blissfully aware, like he's happy that I trust him enough to come here. Rae has always been there for me and has always cared for some reason. And while I don't agree with his views on me, I am ever so grateful for him even existing. 

Without thinking, my mouth moves. I'm spilling the guilts and concerns of my heart, talking about how I should tell Ocie. It's like watching a trainwreck in slow motion from a 3rd person point of view, I can see myself but I can't act. Rae's expression turns, from happiness to even more anxiety. Rae then holds my hands from across the table, listening with intent before calmly responding. I didn't even notice my breathing become choppy or the tears falling down. 

"David, it's going to be okay. I agree with telling Ocie what happened, but let's wait for you to calm down." He explains, sadly similing. 


I eventally stop crying, and my breathing slows and steadies. I nod, hoping Rae once agains understands, and he does. 

The shorter grabs my hands and we make it out the door, letting our wings unfold and grabbing our rockets we make our way over to seaside. Gliding in the sky side by side, him being here made this experience somewhat more bearable. We land on the dock next to the overgrown, small farm. I see Ocie in the distance gathering flowers, and a part of me breaks inside, a part of my heart dissapates into that undeserving void.
Rae senses my unsteadiness and grabs my wrist to steadily pull me along the path. 

~~Ocie POV~~

Gathering flowers, feeling my fins wriggle in happiness. I was going to make a flower garden for Chaos and Jerry! Chaos and Jerry... I love them both dearly. 

Huh?

I hear Rae and Centross's voices getting nearer, their hushed voices with quiet mumbles of concern mix together as they reach where I am. 

"Hi, Rae and Centross.. What's up?" I ask confused, to see them both, after what's happened with Ven... They share a glance, I know humans well enough to know that glance. Something happened. Something bad. Centross takes a breath before uttering words I never wanted to hear. 

"Chaos is dead, and I killed her..."