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“Okay, lemme get this straight.” Tim’s Red Robin’s best friend civilian classmate pressed the tips of his fingers together, taking a deep breath. (and Red Robin was pointedly not thinking about that, why Danny Fenton had appeared in the circle meant to summon the Ghost King, what it meant that his supposedly alive friend classmate was the King of All Ghosts. compartmentalisation was a very useful skill) “A weather-controlling ghost is wreaking havoc along the East Coast, and you decided the best shot at taking them down is to find another ghost of equal calibre to fight them. So instead of—I dunno, calling the one superhero who’s known to be a ghost, you went and tried to summon the Ghost King.”
Batman grunted. (translation: yes. this wouldn’t have happened if I had been consulted before the plan was put in action. I am currently piecing together the reason for your presence, and I do not like what I have discovered)
Danny ignored him. (and that was another mystery answered, wasn’t it? this was why Danny had never seemed intimidated by Batman) Instead, he turned to the man next to Batman.
“You, Constantine.” Danny said, then paused. “You are John Constantine, right? Because if there’s another beat-up-looking British-adjacent guy with over a hundred claims on his soul working with the Justice League, I’m gonna be really concerned. You are? Okay, good. Then pray tell me, why in the name of all the Ancients did you think this is a good fucking idea?”
“My sources told me Pariah Dark had been defeated by a benevolent ghost who has fought Vortex before. I figured the new Ghost King wouldn’t be opposed to lending us a hand.” Constantine looked at Danny shrewdly. “I wasn’t aware the new Ghost King is Phantom.”
(ugh. Constantine just had to go and say it. now Red Robin was going to have an existential crisis tonight about how his best friend was apparently dead and a superhero and Red Robin hadn’t even noticed. some detective he was.)
“Your sources.” Danny pinched the bridge of his nose. “Your sources wouldn’t happen to be demons, would they?”
“Of course they are.” Constantine replied, almost offended. “What did you expect?”
Danny groaned. “Demons are the worst.” He declared. Constantine made a face, as if he didn’t want to agree with Danny but unfortunately did. “Anyway, the Ghost King can’t help you.”
“Why?” Red Robin spoke up, “You’re a superhero, aren’t you, Phantom?”
Danny looked at Constantine again. “I thought you were an expert on all things occult.” He complained, before turning back to Red Robin. “I said the Ghost King can’t help you. That title doesn’t mean whatever those demons apparently told Constantine, otherwise you never would’ve summoned me.”
Batman glowered at Constantine. (translation: I am judging you, Constantine, and I have found you lacking)
“Then what does it mean?” Red Robin asked, when Constantine didn’t say anything. He simply stood there looking increasingly disgruntled.
“The Ghost King,” Danny recited with a put-upon sigh, sounding like someone who had both heard and delivered this lecture way too many fucking times. Red Robin could relate. “Is the spiritual leader of the Ghost Zone. It is to be both Priest and Bride of the Core, the Bridge between the will of the Infinite Realms Herself and Her inhabitants. The Ghost King cannot cast judgement upon his subjects unless it’s the will of the Core, which this is not. Until then, the Ghost King cannot help you.”
“Hn.” Batman said. (translation: please stop talking about yourself in third person. it does not suit your MO)
“But Pariah Dark—”
“Why do you think Pariah Dark was sealed by the Ancients? All that power got to his head, and he had the bright idea of siphoning power from the Core Herself to further his own conquesting ambitions. And before you ask,” Danny added as he saw Constantine open his mouth, “no, I didn’t become the Ghost King because I beat that asshole in combat. I beat up Pariah Dark, and then the Core took such a liking to me that She decided to make me her Priest. There’s a difference, for Ancients’ sake.”
Danny lowered his voice, muttering, “Fucking demons, spreading this stupid misinformation. Why can't they stop pretending they’re experts when they don’t even know jackshit about our culture?”
“Yeah, yeah, fine, I get it.” Constantine waved his hand flippantly. “I’ll stick to summoning demons next time, for fuck’s sake.”
“This still doesn’t solve our Vortex problem.” Red Robin pointed out, “And don’t you fight ghosts all the time? Why is it different now?”
“I said the Ghost King cannot help you, never said anything about Phantom.” Danny corrected. “The Ghost King is a noble Priest who must not enact violence upon his subjects. Phantom is a teenage superhero with way too much misplaced aggression after my shitty finals last week.” Danny pounded his fist into his palm. “I’ll take care of Vortex, don’t worry. It’s been way too long since I last sparred against that guy anyway.”
Batman grunted. (translation: you could’ve just said that from the beginning. this was an unnecessary waste of time)
“I’m just saying.” Danny waved his hand dismissively. “You didn’t have to summon me. Secret identities are secret for a reason, dude. You could’ve just called me. Like, y’know, normal human beings. Batman has my number.”
“Hn.” (translation: I would’ve, if someone hadn’t failed to inform the League that the Ghost King he intended to summon was Danny Phantom)
Constantine whipped his head around, “Since when did you have Phantom’s number!?“
Batman glowered. (translation: because I am Batman)