Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The dark surrounds me until the dreaded words appear once again in front of me.

“You died.”

In a large white font, the words slowly fade in and out displaying the same message as always.

“Would you like to try again?”

I reach my hand towards yes, but before I can press it a hand from the darkness holds onto my wrist. A dark booming voice is heard from behind me. “You have failed to do your duties.” I turn around to face her. Her large towering figure looks at me with disappointment. Her body, only slightly illuminated by the text. For a second, I could almost see a familiar face in her terrifying frame.

The angel.

“I have once again held up my end of our bargain, so when will you?”

She says with a hint of annoyance.

“Must I wait until you’ve saved the world to receive the payment I want?”

I just shake my head. It’s not that easy.

“I’m working on it now if I may? I need to get back to my team.”

I snatch my wrist away from the disembodied hand holding on. Before she can answer, I quickly press yes and start to fade back into life.

“Kris. Remember what I am doing for you.”

Her last words resonate with me until I open my eyes, once again in the same battlefield I had just left. “Kris you alright?” Susie looks down upon me. She almost looks worried but she really shouldn’t be. Ralsei is holding my arm, maybe a little tighter than necessary for healing. I nod my head silently, causing them both to sigh in relief. I stand myself back up to reassess our situation. The Queen's giant robot stands in front of us with her hands ready. Before we can take a breath, she right hooks our robot in the face.

I cannot stop myself before I start to bark out orders towards my teammates. We must win. I’d rather finish this fight without another run in with her. Slowly, the orders come from someone else. I just witness the takeover of my body without fighting back. I’m so tired.

The fight is swiftly over, being held hostage by the Queen robot. Noelle and Queen argue, Noelle telling her how she really feels. It’s almost surreal and I wish I had the courage.

“Take Your Power And Stay In The World You Choose. The World That Makes You Happy.. Sweetie.”

Queen says with her last percentage of battery before shutting down. The rest of the cutscene resumes as normal. The words Queen said are repeated in my head. Over and Over. “The world you choose.” “The world you choose.” “The world..”

I choose.

The three of us are dropped back onto the platform with Noelle. Susie runs up to her and hugs her tight, glad she stood up for herself while Noelle just smiles wide with tears running down her face. Everyone, including Berdly, begins to celebrate the end of this electrical nightmare. But Ralsei stays put behind me. He places a hand on my shoulder and squeezes.

“Are you okay Kris?”

“I don’t have any scars or open wounds, do I?”

“No I mean..”

He bites his lip and stares at me with a concerned look.

“It’s your choice Kris. If you’re not okay with this whole thing, you don’t have to.”

Ralsei pulls me into a big bear hug, holding me close. I keep my hands by my side however. I don’t like hugs, but this gives me an oddly familiar feeling.

“I can do this.”

I confidently replied. I believe I can. I’ll be okay. Because I have to. If I don’t, I’m not sure what she’ll do. So I don’t want to find out.

I close the fountain with my soul. Susie right by my side.

“Thank you for.. that.”

I look towards Susie next to me as the light takes over my vision.

“I know.”

My reply is barely heard over the ear splitting ring. Slowly we begin to reawaken in the library.

“Oh, Hello dear Noelle. I guess we must have fallen asleep!”

Berdly smiles at Noelle as they both sit up in their chairs.

“AH! What are you two doing here?!?”

He points with accusations at the both of us, standing in front of the table in the middle of the room. We stand awkwardly while Berdly squawks loudly, practically shaking the entire room with his voice.

“I- Uh invited them Berdly!”

Noelle loudly admits.

“Them!? Noelle! ..”

He sighs defeated, looking between us and Noelle. He accepts our presence before his phone begins to ring, shaking the table. We all turn our attention towards it as it’s the loudest thing in the room.

“I’ve got work! I apologize Noelle, Gotta bounce!”

He snatches his phone off the table and sprints out of the room. We all just stand in the library, still sort of shell struck from what just happened.

Noelle checks the time on her phone before standing up as well.

“I have to visit my dad! Bye! Thanks for coming!”

She nervously says before running to the door. But before she leaves she stands for a second, eyes set on Susie. Then she leaves.

“Bro.”

Susie begins.

“Bro?”

“That was fucking crazy!!!! I didn’t know anyone else could fall into the dark worlds???? That was crazy difficult!!!”

Susie’s mouth drops wide open, she puts her hands on her head and just looks at me in shock. I can’t muster up any reaction, but Susie continues to say the word “crazy” in many different ways.

That makes me laugh.

A sharp pain in my chest suddenly renders me speechless. The pain tightens my chest and my breathing slows. Tears blur my vision and my knees buckle.

“Hey Kris, you alright?” Susie places her hand on my shoulder, holding it tight.

The pain disappears just as suddenly as it started. She’s warning me. I need to act fast. Before these pains get out of hand. I just wish it was easier.

“Yeah, just a little chest pain. Don’t worry man.”

Susie pats my back and guides me out of the library.

Chapter Text

“Hi sweetheart! How are you doing!” Mum says from the kitchen as I walk inside, Susie walking just behind.

I give her a thumbs up as she walks around the corner. The living room is dimly lit, the TV has loud static playing.

“Hey Kris! Guess who came over today honey.”

Mum smiles at me and encourages me to guess. Although I don’t actually know who could’ve dropped by today. Maybe Asgore?

“Dad.”

“Nope!”

I raised an eyebrow to her response. I didn’t think many people really came over after Asriel left for college. We’re not too popular, or at least I’m not.

“Who then?”

The words catch in my own mouth when Asriel walks down the stairs. He stands at the bottom and stretches out his arms for a hug. Without a second thought, I ran to him and held him tight. In my hands I fidget with the same scruffy sweater that matches mine. Despite his time away, he still has the same exact comforting smell of cinnamon. His arms pull me as close as I can be.

“Missed me bud?”

“Always.”

Asriel just laughs his same laugh as always. God it’s like nothing has changed. I like that. It’s better this way.

“No need to crowd him Kris!” Dess walks down the stairs delayed. She waves at me and walks into the kitchen with mum.

“Is this a friend Kris?”

I pulled myself off of Asriel, remembering that Susie was just a meter behind me.

“Yes. This is Susie, she’s a friend from school.”

“Wow, first friend right?”

“Shut up.”

I punch Asriel on the arm, sticking out my tongue. He just dramatically leans away from my fist. Susie watches in amusement but I realize she doesn’t know who Asriel is.

Before I can properly introduce them, the loud knocking at the front door shuts up the whole house basically.

“I’ve got it!!”

I rush to the door and open it, expecting maybe another pleasant surprise yet there isn’t.

Standing in my doorway is the kind Noelle and her Terrifying mother. Noelle smiles and shows off the flowy blue dress that her mother made her wear, definitely. However the Mother of this welcoming child is not the same. She stands in a suit she was probably wearing to work, a tired look on her face.

“Oh Carol! Noelle! Welcome! Come inside, we’re just about to serve up dinner” Mum says from the kitchen with a smile.

As happy as I am that Noelle is here, I’m a bit worried about her mum. Last I heard there was a bit of drama between her and Dess.

“Hey mum!”

My anxieties are put to rest when Dess runs up to her and hugs her tight. And surprisingly Carol hugs her back. That’s nice. Everything’s a bit nice at the moment. Susie and Asriel are both talking, bonding. Mum is in the kitchen cooking a delicious spaghetti dinner and Dess, Noelle and Carol are all catching up. It all looks so warm. A smile just grows across my face at the sight of everyone getting along. I’ve missed this.

I walk to the bathroom, despite how lovely it all is I need to shit.

After I’m done, I’m busy watching my hands. My sleeves are pulled up high and I can see the small healed scars from the encounter earlier with the angel.

A hand grabs my shoulder. I jump quickly, turning around to see the perpetrator with my hands up ready to punch.

“Wow! Dude I just wanted to let you know dinner’s ready. No need to hurt me!!”

Dess laughs and leaves the bathroom but the anxious feeling in my chest doesn’t leave. I almost feel light headed as I realize I’m hyperventilating. What is happening to me? God what’s going to happen to me if I can’t do what she said. I just want to save everyone.

I walk out into the dining room, a cold sweat hidden by my long hair. An empty chair right next to Dess screaming at me. I take my seat, across from Susie who’s next to Noelle and Asriel.

“Dinner is served everyone!!”

Toriel walks over with a big pot full of spaghetti and places it in the middle of the table. Within seconds everyone takes their portions, eager to begin eating. Especially Susie who is eating the spaghetti so fast I don’t even think she’s noticed the fact it’s scorching hot.

Some light talk continues across the table but I can’t bring myself to participate with my own paranoia looming over me. I sit there silently playing with my small portion of spaghetti. I roll it onto my fork then push it around in the bowl, making it look like I’ve eaten more of it than I have.

My brain flicks between different images of the dark world. And the angel. And everything that takes up real estate inside of my mind. What realistically is going to happen to me if I don’t comply with her wishes? What real world consequences will I have if I do? Is there any way I can get out of this? Probably not.

“Hey Kris Honey? You haven’t eaten any of your spaghetti! Is something wrong sweetheart?”

Toriel looks at me worried without catching the attention of anyone else at the table.

“I’ve eaten some of it. See?”

I push more spaghetti to the side of my bowl, leaving more empty room on one side than the other. Despite my obviously emptying bowl, She doesn’t seem all too convinced.

“I’m just not that hungry. I’m fine.”

I throw on a small smile and she just sighs and continues on with her previous conversation with Asriel about college. I shove some spaghetti down, scrunching my face in the process. It tastes delicious but the feeling of the spaghetti entering my body gives me shivers I’ll never forget. I can feel the spaghetti sitting in my stomach as I continue to quickly shove spaghetti in my mouth.

Quickly the dinner moves onto desert, a yummy cinnamon and butterscotch pie. One like the many we’ve had before at this very dinner table. All of us with a slice, I begin to haul large amounts into my mouth quickly. I just want to go to bed as quickly as I can.

“May I?”

Carol stands up with her signature glass of wine. Toriel nods despite this not being a particularly big dinner party, mainly filled with teenagers that don’t care about the latest political issues which is 90% of what she discusses.

“I am so glad to welcome Dess back from college.”

Toriel clears her throat loudly and Carol retracts.

“Oh, and Asriel. I am so proud of you both for making it this far. And may we celebrate Dess leaving her little rebellious phase. Now let’s eat!”

Dess scoffs at the last sentence about her but doesn’t speak up about it. No one at the table does because it’s easier to just deal with the negative words she says rather than fighting them.

We all eat our pie and just pray for the dinner to end. Which it does, after what felt like a million years. As Noelle, Carol and Dess are about to leave, Mum suggests Noelle stays over along with Susie. Which Noelle of course doesn’t refuse. A night away from her mum and her big girl crush. We all settle in on the couch together and that’s a night. However, no matter how long I ignore it. The anxious thoughts dwelling don’t leave.

The movie plays on the screen loudly, but I can’t stop myself from hyperventilating. Susie has her arm around me but I honestly can’t stop myself. My chest feels so heavy.

The burden of a soul, the heaviest curse of them all. But yet crucial to your life, isn’t it Kris? Perfect opportunity.

The familiar disembodied voice of hers whispers in my ears. She is forever connected to me, with no way to protest.

I jump off the couch and away from Susie, sprinting to the bathroom. The door locks behind me. I just look into the mirror. I can feel the skin tightening around my chest which slowly flows to my fingers. With horror, I can see the skin on my fingers slowly turning green. They wrinkle quickly, almost as if they were rotting on my body. It stings in a way that makes me become light headed. The skin splits as if the seams on my body become undone. The blood slowly drips out onto the floor.

Quickly I grab the first aid kit underneath the bathroom sink and carefully bandage each and everyone of my fingers. I can feel my skin writhe underneath it but it seems like the only way to keep my skin intact. I’m running out of time. She’s given me a ticking clock that can only be stopped by bloodlust. How pathetic of a way to get what you want. She won’t stop until I’m dead or they are. How do I beat this?

Slowly the pain becomes normal to my body. It ends where my fingers meet my hand but I know soon enough it will spread even more. Until I’ve been destroyed. Until the soul is just walking in my slowly rotting corpse.

I take a breath and look into the mirror. I think I have to open a dark world. Queen said to choose the world that makes me happy but what if that world has to be created. With the determination in my soul, the very culmination of my body. I can do this. I’ll save myself. And Susie, And Noelle. Everyone who needs saving. Even Ralsei.

I unlocked the door with some troubles, with bandages on my fingers and all, to see Susie standing just in front of the door.

“Need to go?”

“Nope.”

“Okay.”

I begin my walk back to the couch with Noelle before Susie stops me. She grabs onto my arm, pulling me back to her.

“Dude are you alright? Like you’ve been acting crazy weird since we left that dark world!”

I just shift my eyes up at her as she continues.

“Well more weird than normal, okay! Is it your chest again? Are you having a heart attack??? Can I help? Dude I’m worried!!!!!” Her hands are cupping my face which is surprisingly close to hers. The worry is conveyed on her face pretty obviously.

“I’m good.”

“Are you sure?”

“Coolio dude.”

Susie looks at me confused before laughing loudly. She places a hand on my face and pushes me away while continuing to laugh.

“Alright man if you say so.”

We join Noelle on the couch and the guilt slowly creeps up my back. In a matter of time both Noelle and Susie had fallen asleep. The movie ended and they were both leaning on me while they quietly snored. Or atleast Noelle quietly snored. Now to get to work.

I stand up in the middle of the room. Wrenching my hand into my chest before successfully pulling out my soul. It dimly glowed red and I just placed it on Toriel's chair. I pull out a knife readying it to pierce the earth. With all the force I can muster I thrust it into the ground. The darkness slowly fills the room around me. I turn to take my seat on the couch again but a voice from the stairs stops me in my tracks.

“Kris?”

Asriel stares at me worried before we’re all engulfed by darkness.

Chapter Text

I woke up on the ground. A smooth, almost shining floor.

“Augh. What is-? OH GOD DAMNIT.”

Susie yells loudly, causing me to jolt up.

“That stupid knight. Can’t even sleep around here bro!”

Susie complains under her breath. She’s in her darkworld outfit. Small leather cuffs around her arm and shoulder, with a black leather vest and black pants. It’s like there are no other colors. But behind her I see a small bit of blue.

“Where are we?”

A mild mannered voice from behind Susie speaks up.

“I don’t know.”

Susie replies. I guess we’ve got to explore this place. I need to find some enemies quickly. I stand up, looking around at the dark world I’ve created.

We’re standing in an empty clearing, the wildlife surrounding us have glowing white outlines while being completely black and the sky, the static of a TV above us. Rough heavy bush surrounds us with a very obvious path which was carved out. Seems like the only option is to follow the path out of here.

“That looks like it goes on forever.”

Noelle sighs at the thought of a never ending path.

“Only one way to find out I guess.”

We walk through the path, feeling quite claustrophobic. The bush practically crushed us between it’s branches.

Despite the need to actually think about where we are, I can’t take Asriel out of my mind. He didn’t fall with us. I don’t even know if he’s here. Maybe he got out in time? But I doubt it. I just don’t want him to get hurt. Especially not after he just got back. I really messed up this time.

Tears well up in my eyes, while I continue to walk with my dry throat scratching.

“Kris, are you alright man?”

Susie leans forward in almost a whisper, she places a hand on my shoulder which I quickly jolt away from.

“Fine.”

I can feel Susie’s confused eyes on me but I continue to just walk forward. I don’t want to worry her and if it means I have to shut her out to do so, I can sacrifice it.

Susie just doesn’t know what can happen. I’m protecting her. Even if it feels like we’re back to square one. Maybe if she threatens my life again, I might be able to do this easily. Not to get my hopes up.

We walk in silence for seconds, which slowly turn into minutes. Yet we seem to be getting no closer to the end of this path. This path can’t possibly be this long right?

“How long is this path going to go for?”

I shrug my shoulders yet Susie persists with questions.

“We’ve been walking for so long. I’m getting tired. I did not wake up in this place just to walk!!”

“I just wish the path was shorter.”

Almost like clockwork, after Noelle’s small comment the end appeared in front of us. I can’t believe my eyes at what we were entering.

A small bustling market in front of us, overflowing with monsters. Yet they all sold somewhat similar merch for the exact same game. Dragon Blazers III. Oh my god. The stalls have loud marketters behind them. They smile and yell, offering you any of their “goods” for a low price. The smiles seemed forced, but I can’t say anything. Noelle’s smile makes my stomach churn, I can’t ruin this for her like I do with everything else.

“Noelle.”

“Oh my god.”

“Did you do this?”

“Oh my god.”

“Jesus christ.”

Noelle’s face lights up as we walk through the market. Everything is so bright it’s almost blinding. Compared to the rest of the world, it looks like a rainbow threw up on it. Despite Noelle’s very obvious enthusiasm and Susie’s hidden interest, I can’t help but feel an overwhelming anxiety filling up my chest. Why is the rest of the world so dark and bleak? The static sky still stares down at us and the dark trees still surround us, so why is this small part of this world so bright?

“Noelle don’t touch anything. We’re just passing through to find..” Asriel, “the fountain.”

She pouts while still looking around at all the stalls.

“It can’t hurt right? Just take a little longer.”

“No we can’t. Let’s just go.”

Noelle’s face drops at my firmness but listens anyway. Her frown makes me regret my decision almost instantly but I need to protect them. We walk through the market, pushing through the large crowds of monsters.

I keep my head down and push through where I need to if I can’t miraculously find a way to dodge through the monsters.

“Hey, uh, Kris?-”

Susie says loudly, looking around quite confused.

“Not you too Susie. We’re getting out of here right now.”

“No that’s not it.”

“Yes it is. We are leaving so just stop pestering me about it.”

“Kris that’s not what!-”

“CAN’T YOU JUST LISTEN?!”

I stop and turn around at Susie. I can feel the overwhelming guilt built inside when I raise my voice but I’ve already dug the grave I’m lying in. That’s when I see that we have lost Noelle.

“Oh.”

Susie looks at me with such a “I told you so” face but I just ignore it and look around for Noelle. That’s when I slowly started to realize more about this market. The consumers are all now staring at us, weapons in hand. Even the children stand there, daggers hiding beneath their capes.

“Susie, find Noelle.”

The crowds slowly start to close in around us.

“But Kris, what about you?”

“I’ll manage.”

Susie pushes out without much resistance, calling for Noelle to the best of her ability.

The crowd is ready for the fight to begin and I don’t stop them. If they want a fight, they will get a fight. I hope to angel she’s watching. I need to play my cards right. And save everyone.

Chapter Text

I push through the crowd. I hold my head as high as I can see to hopefully see the antlers of Noelle or maybe spot her golden hair.

A few meters away I can see her talking to a market clerk with a particularly eye-catching stall. I walk through the crowds of people, trying to ignore how Kris has been acting as I replay it all inside my head a million times over.

“Hey Noelle. Kris said to find you. They’re.. Uh.. fighting some people. What’s up?”

I place a hand on her head and ruffle her hair a little. She jumps at my touch, which doesn’t entirely surprise me so I just put my hand back by my side. She turns around to look at me as if she just got caught and that’s when I get a proper look at the clerk she was talking to.

It’s Ralsei.

I almost burst out laughing in that very second at the sight of Ralsei behind a stall in a random market, but he puts his finger up to his lips to shush me. I don’t know why.

“Wait. Is Kris fighting them all alone??”

Noelle looks almost worried, but I’m not. I’ve seen what Kris can do. They are terrifying.

“Yeah. They said they could handle it.” Noelle looks entirely unimpressed, “Hey look I trust them! They’ll be fine. Anyways, what do they sell at this stall that got you so interested?”

I lean down, still chuckling a little at Ralsei while I look at the contents of the shop.

“W-Well! I actually came over here because I thought the clerk was.. Asriel. Kind of stupid I guess!”

She laughs at herself. I never thought about it that way. I didn’t even connect the dots about how similar they look. I squint my eyes at Ralsei, considering it for a moment before nodding my head. He really does look like Asriel. How ironic.

“Should we make our way back to Kris?”

Noelle smiles at me, sending a small lump into my throat. I just nod at her and walk through the crowd of people again. As we walk, Noelle grabs onto my hand. I squeeze it a little, not wanting to lose her again in the crowd as we get to the end of the market again. Kris stands there, completely alone with their sword put away.

“Let’s go.”

Kris doesn’t even turn around to greet us before walking back into the bushes like before. The small cramped path, identical to the one we walked through before. Noelle and I follow suit quickly, hands still in each other's.

I wonder what’s up with Kris. They’ve been acting so scary? I feel like that’s a mean thing to think about a friend and an even meaner thing to assume, but they’re giving me nothing else to go off here. Ever since the second dark world, ever since they were downed during the queen fight, it’s like we don’t matter anymore. I can’t help but fear we’ve gone back to square one, but the other way around. Despite us making amazing friends in our adventures, Kris doesn’t open up to anyone. The happiest I’ve ever seen them was when Asriel was at their house.

I wish I could make them that happy.

Before long, we popped back out into another clearing, my mind was brought back to the present.

The clearing, empty and dry. Trees without leaves. The sight of it all sends shivers down my spine, but I don’t say a thing. Noelle looks up at me, scared.

“Hey it’s okay Noelle. It’s just a small clearing.”

I let go of her hand and placed it around her shoulder. I look around at the clearing as we slowly progress. We can see the end on the other side, yet it feels so far away. Kris keeps their head down the entire time, ignoring Noelle and I as we quietly talk to each other.

My mind races, seemingly faster than before from the small anxiety rising in my chest.

“Kris.”

They stop, turning around, yet still not looking at me.

“Give me a sec Noelle.”

I grab Kris’s shoulder and lead them out of earshot of Noelle, but still in eyesight, I want to make sure she’s safe.

I bend down to their eye level, feeling a small drip of sweat form on my face.

“Dude. What is up with you? Why are you being so cold? Did.. Did I do something? You can tell me Kris. Just let me help.”

Their eyebrows furrow as I say this. It’s like they’re a new person. Someone unrecognizable. It scares me.

“I’m fine, Susie.”

The way they say my name sounds different than usual. It feels sharp and robotic what they say, different from their usual tone. The warmness of my friend is gone. This isn’t my friend. I feel my heart crack a little from their total ignorance to my concerns.

“No you’re not. I’m not stupid. Just talk to me! I can handle it.”

“No you can’t.”

“What makes you say that? I swear man. Please.”

I feel myself growing desperate to become a shoulder my friend can lean on if they need it. I just want Kris to rely on me. I want Kris to feel better. If I could I would take all of their hurt, if they would let me shoulder just a small bit of the burdens they’re carrying. I could take away that pain they so obviously are feeling at the moment.

“Susie. It’s something so crazy. You probably wouldn’t even believe me if I did.”

“Just let me atleast.. Give you a hug. Show you that you can trust me. And you can rely on me. I’m here for you if you let me. I’m not letting you push me away from you.”

I place my hands on their shoulders as I look into their eyes. I see a small bit of remorse grow in their eyes as they jump forward, wrapping their arms around me. I laugh at their embrace and hug them back. It’s a start at least. We stay hugging for at least a few minutes before I speak again.

“Should we go back to Noelle, she looks scared shitless.”

I laugh, looking over to Noelle who’s looking around her constantly. We make eye contact and she just does a small thumbs up. Kris nods their head and we walk back over to Noelle.

“Sorry for leaving for a while, we needed to talk.”

I place a fist on their head and ruffle their hair a little, which they just smile at. Noelle smiles at both of us, obviously relieved Kris is back to their somewhat normality.

We all continue our walk through the forest, yet it seems to be a little less scary than it was before. The trees seem less dead, the fog surrounding us feels a little warmer. Everything is a little warmer. Crazily some colors start to fade back in. I smile as this small clearing slowly becomes a bright area, filled with trees and green grass. Flowers pop out of the ground, as if we’re in some kind of game.

“Look. It’s all colorful now. Even the sky.”

I point upwards to see that the previously static sky was now a nice blue with clouds.

“This is beautiful! Can we stay here for a bit? It seems very peaceful.” Noelle smiles innocently at Kris, awaiting their answer.

I look towards Kris, a little nervous for their answer. But they just smile and turn around.

“Yeah let’s stay for a bit.”

Noelle celebrates a little, immediately running around and looking at the small flower beds. My eyes follow her. My heart has grown pretty fond of Noelle. She looks so pretty in this small field of flowers.

I watch Noelle and see Kris creep closer to me from the corner of my eye. They place an arm around me, squeezing me close to them as they look into my eyes.

“Thanks man. You’re the best.”

I laugh and push them off.

“I knew that already!”

They laugh at me, and we just stand there laughing at each other.

“You wanna know something funny?”

“God, always.”

“We actually saw Ralsei earlier, but he didn’t even offer to come with us. What a nerd.”

I laugh at the memory of him behind the stall, but Kris just looks up at me seriously.

“Wait, you saw Ralsei?”

“Um. Yeah? Why?”

Kris’s face looks almost terrified. They look worried. I don’t know what I said but I feel infinitely worse than before because now I think I caused their bad mood.

“Sorry Kris, should I have invited him along with us?”

Kris looks up at me, before just laughing it off awkwardly. I can tell they’re still a little bothered, but not my area to bring it up I don’t think.
Suddenly in the background though I hear small rustles in the bush from where we came from. A familiar monster walks out into the field, yet they don’t seem to have seen us.

Chapter Text

I turn my head around to the opening of this clearing to see Asriel walking through. I feel my brain start to fuzz as he notices us, his eyes widening. Quickly, he lowers his head and walks to the other end of the clearing.

“Hey man! So you did want to come with us!”

Susie runs over to him, placing a hand on his head before he moves away. He seems skittish almost. I hurriedly followed Susie, worried she'd say something.

“Susie.”

“What?”

I look at her, eyes slightly flickering over to Asriel before returning to hers. I feel a small smile grow on my face as I stifle a laugh. Neither of them recognise each other. And they just met??

“Are you serious? Do you not recognise who that is?”

I chuckle under my breath slightly as Susie looks confused. Asriel looks at me as I try not to laugh and realizes who we are. I can see a grin growing on his face but Susie can’t connect the dots.

“It’s Ralsei??”

I double over, laughing hard and loud now. Enough to draw Noelle’s attention to us as she walks over to us. Asriel just covers his mouth as he laughs politely.

“Oh hey it’s you!!”

She points at Asriel, Noelle runs over happily. I’m almost shocked she didn’t recognise him either.

“You both are idiots.”

“What?! Rude!!”

Susie looks at me with a confused and curious look but I can’t look at her seriously, laughter still building up inside my chest.

“That’s literally Asriel.”

My tone was dead serious despite my playful expression. I laugh even harder as I see it dawn on Susie’s face that it was, in fact, my brother. However Noelle's face lights up like a light.

“I knew it!!!!”

She laughs triumphantly, her hands on her hips as he revels in her discovery. She starts to lightly tease Susie, both of them laughing at each other. The friendliness between them makes me feel happy, the way they are slowly warming up to each other. Like two different worlds I'm a part of merging. I almost forget about Asriel being in the middle of it all. He walks over to me, away from the two bickering and stands next to me with a smile.

He looks down at me, a now worried expression on his face. Maybe he remembered what happened before we came here. Seeing me, with a knife in hand. It sends shivers down my spine as I think about it, an anxious pit in my stomach now growing as he continues to look at me from the corner of my eye.

“Do you want to talk about it, Kris?”

“No.”

I feel the harshness in my voice cut him like a razor. I can see the small amount of hurt in his eyes as I refuse his help. Of course he had to remember. He has to remember about my failure to be a good person.

I’m scared. Scared he’ll tell Susie. Terrified that Susie and Noelle and Ralsei and everybody I’ve met and loved, will hate me. Will find the truth and be angry. I can feel my hands start to shake as I just think about it. My mind wanders and I imagine it all. Every possibility of pain. Reveling in the hurt and anguish I could cause. Anything could happen, yet the predictability of them all makes it all the more easier to know how it could ruin everything.

Suddenly I feel Asriel’s hand grab my shoulder. He gives me a small squeeze, just resting his hand on me. I can feel the comfort of my brother radiate off of him in such a simple action. I almost feel tears form in my eyes, growing a little misty. But I just blink it away.

I smile at him, which he returns.

“You should probably stop them before they hurt someone.. Or themselves.”

He points over at Noelle and Susie, who are still half-seriously bickering about it. I laugh at their idiocy and walk over. I can feel Asriel’s eyes on me as I calm them down. His presence gives me the strength to stay calm.

“We should probably get going, you guys. So stop arguing!”

Susie looks at me, a small shocked but amused look on her face. She turns to Noelle with a cocky smile on her face, leaning in close before turning back to me.

“Only once you tell Noelle that I’m always right.”

“That’s fundamentally impossible Susie!”

Noelle mumbles out, looking at her angrily.

“Oh shut your trap!!”

Within seconds, they are back at each other's throats. I feel a need to stop this before they hurt each other. With words or with swords, all the same in my books.

“Oh my angel. Both of you shut up!!”

I say, rubbing my temples. They both turn to me once again. The shock on their faces grew as I glared at them both. Despite the playfulness behind the argument, I can't help but feel the migraine of their bickering grow in my mind.

“Let’s just go. You act like children.”

I begin my walk to the next small path in the bushes. Asriel follows behind me happily while the others not so much. Susie crosses her arms, looking like a child throwing a tantrum while Noelle just keeps her head down with a smile on her face. Our party starts to grow, along with my deepset anxiety. Bubbling up to my chest, tightening around my lungs while the pain in my fingers that was previously manageable starts to sting again. A reminder of the ticking clock I'm working under. The slow countdown of my time. The time I have left withering away.

I don't even know if I'll make it out of here.

Chapter Text

My body now increasingly weaker, we continue our small walk through the bushes. The skin on my fingers writhing, but I ignore it. That’s my best option. Even though it hurts. I feel my body trembling slightly.

Suddenly, ripping me out of my thoughts, Asriel grabs onto my back. I go to turn around to yell at him before stopping, anything I could’ve said forgotten as I look down. A deep pit, seemingly endless, stretches on for miles infront of me. And I almost just waltzed right into it. Asriel pulls me back away from the cliff.

“Thank you.”

I mumble out, my voice slightly hoarse.

“Why’re we stopping?”

I hear Susie call out as she attempts to see what’s ahead. She pushes to the front, effectively pushing us into the bushes beside her. She stops as she sees the empty pit ahead of us.

It stretches on for a good length. In between all the nothingness are small islands, all jumping width apart. Yet the path it takes us on above the pit curves and circles. Not a single straight way to the end as far as the eye can see. Looking down into the pit causes an anxiety to render me light headed. The darkness below going so far down you cannot even see the walls. Even throwing a rock down there would be a bad idea as it would simply fall forever.

I swallow the lump in my throat before ushering Susie back away from the edge.

“We can make it. The end is over there. If we just..”

I start to begin a plan in my head, until I see poor Noelle. She shakes as she looks at the path ahead for us. Her eyes are wide and her face has grown pale. I can almost feel the fear radiating off of her.

“Noelle..? Are you alright?”

I ask her, worry in my voice as I move closer to her. She hurriedly shakes her head, her eyes grow misty. I place a hand on her shoulder, trying to provide as much comfort as I can before Susie pushes me off. Before I can say anything, Susie scoops Noelle up in her arms.

“I’ll carry you. Let’s just go.”

She says slightly annoyed, holding Noelle in her arms like a baby with Noelle’s head resting on her shoulder. She doesn’t protest, instead leaning into the way Susie is holding her. I feel a bit of shock wash over me before I just decide to accept the situation. If this is the only way we can get Noelle across, it will have to do.

I begin to lay out the plan to Susie and Asriel, Noelle half listening but still trying to calm down.

“So we stick to one path. We don’t know how much these islands can handle so I say we go one after the other. Does that sound good?”

Susie nods, while Asriel looks at me for a second. I forget he’s never seen me be so commanding. Or anything like that. Slowly he nods, as if he finally processed it all.

We begin our journey across the pit to nothingness. I jump across the islands slowly, Asriel following just an island behind me. As I go further and further I map out the path, but it’s a long winding path. I feel a small sense of dread as I look at how much further we have still to go.

I hear Susie and Noelle slowly following behind us, knowing whenever they jump by Noelle small yips.

I continue to move forward, focusing on my jumps and trying to work on my precision. That is, until I hear another scream behind me. One not from Noelle.

I whip around to see Asriel on the very edge of the island, holding onto the grass with all his might. I feel panic overwhelm me as I see him slipping further and further down into the pit. I quickly jumped over to the island, reaching my hand out to him. But no matter how fast I seem to be, he still falls. I hear his scream becoming louder as he lets go of the grass, ripping up chunks of dirt along with him.

His scream echoes slightly as he falls, yet I cannot see where he even fell. The darkness of the hole slowly engulfs him. My legs shake and I fall to my knees. Panic overwhelms me as I look at where Asriel was previously. As if something was missing. A lost piece of a puzzle. Yet I can’t cry. The numbness of losing him again. The loss of him. There one second and gone the next. I could’ve helped him. Guilt tightens in my chest as my skin starts to rot even more. It slowly moves up my arms to about half-way up my forearms. I just clutch onto my arms, trying to hold it all together. Trying to force my body to stay together for one second while I take everything in.

In the distance, I see Susie jumping quickly towards me. She seems almost panicked. Once she gets on my island she starts to scream some nonsense. I can’t even hear her over the ringing in my ears. I stand completely still, frozen. Eventually she quietens down and just grabs me by my sweater. She pulls me along as she continues running. She hops across islands as quickly as she can while dragging along two people. Slowly I snap out of it, to see the islands before us slowly start to fall down. But it’s catching up.

I jump up out of her hands and brush myself off before sprinting alongside her. I continue to clutch onto my arm as I run, hoping for a way to just stop for a second. As we grow closer to the end, the islands continue to fall right behind us. I take one final look behind me, as if searching for something.

In the pit I can see Asriel. His arms wave frantically, just reaching above the darkness. I ran towards him. I ran back across the islands and even close to the edge of the islands.

“Kris! What are you doing?”

I hear Susie yell out panicked, setting Noelle down at the end as she watches me with shock.

“Asriel!! He’s!! He’s in the pit! I can see him!!”

I yell back worried. I grow closer to him, yet closer to the edge. I feel the desperation as my chest starts to close. I breathe heavily, tired from the running yet I continue. Once I reach the edge, I reach out my hand as far as I can. I reach for Asriel’s hand, ignoring the islands falling around me. I can hear Susie’s panicked yelling behind me as she begs me to just get to the end. I can hear the island I’m on crumbling slightly underneath me. Yet I can also hear Asriel’s calls for help from the darkness. I can hear my brother. I can hear him.

I finally latch onto his hand, yet despite my efforts to grab him the island finally falls from underneath me. I fell into the pit with him. My ears still ring. My arm still stings. My efforts feel like a waste since I couldn’t bring Asriel back. I scrunch my eyes tight as I am engulfed by darkness. But I still cling onto his hand. Even when I feel myself land on the ground. Even when the impact sends shivers down my spine.

Chapter Text

I keep my eyes scrunched closed as I land on the ground. A sharp pain is sent through my body from my legs, causing me to start trembling slightly. I hold onto Asriel’s hand as I keep my head down. Small tears grow in the corners of my eyes as the skin on my arm continues to writhe while splitting slowly. I can feel him bend down, placing a hand on my shoulder while trying to calm me down.

“Kris? Kris are you alright? You’re scaring me, what’s wrong?”

He continues to question me, squeezing my shoulder a little tighter. Slowly the pain in my arm fades but the rotting skin is barely melded onto my bones. I see small drops of blood slowly start to stain my shirt as I open my eyes. It spreads slowly. I roll up the sleeves of my shirt as I look in horror at the green shriveled skin. Asriel pulls away in shock, letting go of me as he stares at my arm as well. I grab bandages out of my inventory but it’s too late as blood has already dripped onto the ground around me. I wrap my arm up tight, completely silent while just trying to stop the blood from ruining the bandages too quickly. I pull the bandages as tight as I can to apply pressure, as if it could help.

Finally Asriel speaks.

“What happened to your arm Kris? W-When did that start?”

His voice is shaking, almost strained, as he continues to question me. I feel his gaze go from my arm to my face.

“Kris! Answer me.”

He says desperate. I can feel his anxiety growing, while my dread grows at the same rate. I just keep my head down, hair covering my face as I just hold my arm. I feel small tears roll down my face, staining my face.

“I don’t know. I don’t know Asriel.”

I whisper, my voice cracking slightly as more tears run down my face. Asriel seems to notice them as he grabs me and pulls me into a hug. He holds me in his arms tight, unwilling to let go. We hugged for the first time in a while not that long ago but this feels different. This hug feels desperate and scary instead of comforting and warm. I could feel his fur tickle my skin, but now it feels like sharp needles stabbing me. His breaths pushing his lungs up and down provide more fear than comfort. Yet I hold onto him anyways. I cling onto him as if he was leaving again because this time. I might be.

“Can we go? Please.”

I whisper, pulling away from him slightly. He nods his head, letting me go from the embrace. I feel my heart ache slightly, knowing that Asriel knows everything. I tried to hide it from him. I didn’t want anyone to worry. But they always worry. They shouldn’t spend our last days worried. I wish I could tell him that.

We begin our journey down the dark hallway. Splashes of light shine down upon us frequently, but never stay long enough to properly get a look at our surroundings. I slide my hand along the smooth black walls as we walk, keeping my head down as we walk. It seems like all we’ve ever been doing is walking in silence.

“Kris?”

“Yeah?”

Asriel just smiles at me and continues to look around thoughtfully while our steps echo.

“Just checking you’re still there.”

He says softly.

I smile back at him, yet I doubt he can see it in the dark. Suddenly I feel a firm hand grab me from the front. I let out a small yelp sound as I jumped backwards. In the dark, I see three unlit figures ready to fight.

“Asriel, ever fought before?”

I ask, pulling him next to me as I draw my sword.

“Hell yeah.”

I laugh, seeing him put his hands up in front of his face ready to fight. I quickly rush to the enemies, slashing them with my sword before withdrawing just as quickly. Asriel runs forward and punches them right in their faces before returning back by my side. Immediately the enemies start to scream, throwing frantic punches at us. We continue this song and dance until they turn to dust. I smile at Asriel, feeling slightly better as we continue on our journey through this hallway.

Eventually, enemies become more frequent. I feel exhausted as more appear, preventing us from getting anywhere as we’re constantly ambushed. My slashes become sloppy and my dodging starts to prove ineffective. Suddenly I feel a final blow hit me as I pass out with Asriel on the floor beside me.

I open my eyes, now in an endless open abyss. I groan in dread, reading the glowing words in front of me knowing that she’s standing right behind them. I attempt to skip through the text as quickly as possible, but she just smiles in the darkness.

“No hello for me?”

“Not when you’re trying to kill me.”

She laughs, a great big laugh that echoes throughout the endless plains.

“You crack me up. So.. determined to save everyone. Why not save yourself Kris?”

I feel my heart drop, her laugh causes shivers up my spine. Like an electric shock through my veins.

“I’m not cruel.”

I can hear the smile in her voice at my answer. Her watchful gaze is on me as she leans her face into the light. Dimly lit, I can see her eyes staring at me. Her beautiful features bring dread.

“Only to yourself my dear.”

She says, an amused tone of voice.

I click the button, just trying to get away from her. I ignore everything she says as I leave. Her voice is ringing through my head, yet I don’t comprehend any of it. Asriel and I spawn at the end of the previous challenge. Susie is crouched over me with Noelle next to me, fussing over Asriel as we stir awake. Just like the last time I had woken up, Susie is holding onto me tight, healing me. My sleeves are down now, hiding the bandages. I exhale softly as I look up at Susie and smile.

“Heyy.”

I say softly. I can see her realizing I’m awake. A million thoughts seem to race through her head in that split second before she pulls me up into a hug. I wince softly, my entire body still hurting but I have enough strength to hug her back. My arms wrap around her as well.

“You fucking idiot.”

She whispers to me, her voice dripping with worry, which just causes me to giggle slightly. My face turns slightly red as she holds me.

Chapter Text

My hands clutch to the back of her shirt as I feel the grogginess from just waking up rubbing off. It was always the same when you woke up again.

‘You healed me, Susie?”

My voice is soft with a tone of amusement as I speak, still hugging her. I could feel her head nod gently beside my own. Eventually she splits away, and I rush to brush the red from my face as I clear my throat and look towards Asriel and Noelle. Asriel seemed to be in better shape than I was, and Noelle was always better at healing.

Susie seems almost hesitant as she looks down at me, a glint behind her eye that I recognize. I swallow around the lump in my throat as I clear it.

“So.. Got to the other side, alright, I’m guessing? Glad, that pit was not full of fun.”

I try to bring an air of humor as I speak to Noelle and Susie now. Susie just huffs out a small chuckle, probably for my sake, while Noelle just sighs and nods. Neither of them were hurt, and that was what I cared about most. I turn to look at Asriel; his eyes are locked on me with a cautious look.

“Should we go?-”

“Are you insane?”

Susie’s gruff voice cuts me off. I look over at her with a bit of shock. Where is this even coming from now? She looked entirely too firm now. It worried me a bit. I raise an eyebrow at her reaction, gesturing for her to continue, but instead Noelle does for her.

“Kris.. you were really hurt. We should probably wait for a few minutes.”

Her voice was filled to the brim with worry, and it threw me for a loop. I wasn’t that hurt. They healed me. I didn’t say anything for a beat as I felt them looking at me. How could I reply to that? My head rocks into a nod as I look at her, sitting up properly now and brushing off the remaining dirt from my scuffy sweater.

A few minutes pass and we’re all situated around the entrance for the next thin hallway through the trees. Susie’s sitting beside me and I knew her eyes had been locked on me the entire time as we relaxed. I had no idea why but the way a shiver rushed down my spine as she stared made me feel a bit nervous. Noelle and Asriel were talking quietly about a meter away but Noelle continued to nervously glance in our direction. At this point, I knew something was going on. What is everyone’s problem?

“What?”

My tone was snappy as I looked over at her. I didn’t mean to sound so mean but I was growing irritated, like they all were being extra cautious around me. And I know Susie can worry a bit, but this feels like too much.

“Nothing, Kris.”

“It’s something though. You’re staring.”

I note out loud, my face growing closer to hers as I feel suspicion creep up. Her eyes widen a bit before she twists her head to face away from me, a soft frown across her face. I wait for her to elaborate, but it feels like she never will. That is until she speaks up again, a soft tinge to her voice that helped me realize it was something serious. Too serious for Susie.

“You took a really long time to wake up. I thought..”

Her voice trails off softly before she regains herself again with more confidence in her voice yet a mean hint as well.

“I thought you died, asshole. Besides.. I saw the bandages on your arms. What’re they for Kris?”

Courage is poured back into her as she turns her head again and our eyes lock onto each other's. She was dead serious. It felt like an investigation, like I was a guilty criminal under the spotlight. I swallowed my own saliva and I felt a sharp pain in my chest from it but I ignored it and sigh. I shake my head, staring down at the glass beneath us and I start fidgeting as I pull strands out of the dirt.

I can’t tell her the truth, even as I felt the familiar burn of my skin splitting up even more.

“It’s nothing Susie.”

“They were bloody! That’s not nothing, Kris!”

Her voice held conviction as she grew louder. I could feel Noelle and Asriel’s eyes linger over at both of us as they heard the sound of Susie. Her face looked hurt and angry, all at the same time. My eyebrows curled upwards as my lips part softly, sucking air through my teeth as I leaned forward to try and soothe her. My hand lands on her shoulder.

“Susie, it’s okay. I’m fine.”

She brushes off my hand, shaking her head still angry as her eyebrows furrowed further downwards.

“But you’re not, are you? You wouldn’t tell me if you weren’t.”

“Susie, it’s not something you’d understand.”

“Not like you would care even if I tried!”

My firm words died off as her final outburst shut my mouth quickly. I looked at her as I felt sadness creep into my eyes. My silence filled the air as she scoffed and stood up, moving towards the path through the trees and started walking. I watched with shock, shooting Noelle and Asriel a look who both looked retracted from the conversation and quiet. I growl slightly, standing up and quickly following after Susie as I hear Noelle and Asriel follow too. My knees and joints cracked with disuse as I followed after her quickly. I felt desperation to explain myself in my mind but was quickly overridden with the sight of the angel’s cruel face appearing in my vision.

Her cruel face, a familiar tinge yet so far away it seemed impossible. Like seeing the rotting corpse of someone you once knew so well, the absolute emptiness of their warmth soaked out of their skull and bones.