Chapter Text
“Viren, you can’t keep doing this every night.”
Lissa stood in the doorway of her son’s room, peering in. It was late at night; a single candle flickered on the nightstand next to Soren’s bed. The candlelight illuminated her husband, who sat in a chair scanning over a book. He leaned over the sleeping boy’s bedside, the book placed carefully on the covers as the man flipped the pages quietly. He did not look up.
“Can’t do what every night?” The response was automatic. He flipped another page.
Lissa sighed and made her way into the room. Kneeling by the bed, she waved her hand in front of Viren’s book, blocking his view. Only then did he look at her.
Upon seeing his face, she frowned. His eyes were glazed over from lack of sleep, beginning to get bloodshot. Dark circles rested under his eyes, and his hair was unkempt. He wore the same clothes he wore the previous day, and she doubted that he had left the spot since morning.
“Come rest, Viren. Soren will be here in the morning.” she said, with forced reassurance. She closed the book for him, being sure to bookmark his page with the ribbon sewed into the spine. “And so will this spellbook.” She put a loving hand on top of his, and leaned forward to blow out the candle before she was interrupted.
“He has fits during the night. I need to be here to help him.” A grimace fell upon his face, and the wrinkle in his brow seemed to be deeper than usual. “I’ve still yet to…figure something out.”
Lissa knew what he meant. She knew that her husband was searching for a dark magic spell to heal their son. Every night, he hunched over the tomes at Soren’s bedside, searching for a solution. Something horrific to do in sacrifice for a healthy child.
Over time, dark magic had come to disgust her. When she first met Viren, it seemed something like a hobby to him, something to impress women such as herself with. He’d always juggle small flames, or summon bunnies out of smoke for her. Things filled with whimsy that would charm her into liking magic, into liking him. But as the years went on and they had children, she saw what was behind it. He started doing the same tricks for Soren and Claudia, to entertain them. He would face the kids instead of her, and suddenly she’d see the ember-colored spider he would crush behind his back to be able to juggle the flames. She’d see him whisper a spell right before conjuring smoke bunnies, his eyes flashing violet. Upon further inspection, she’d see that he used the ashes of these animals. The whimsy quickly faded away after this.
Now, knowing what Viren was trying to do horrified her. It took a spider to perform a small juggling act. A pinch of cremated rabbit to make children laugh and play with a smoke animal. What would it take to heal a child from an illness such as Soren’s? What would he have to kill?
“Lissa.” His voice shook her away from her thoughts. “Your hand.” Looking down, she realized that she was squeezing his fingers, not unlike Soren used to squeeze hers when he was a baby. She let go and gazed back up at Viren, who gave her a sad look.
“It’s going to be okay. I’m going to fix it.” The hand that she had just been squeezing came to clasp hers. “Soren will be alright.” A faint smile spread across his tired face.
“What terrible thing will you have to do to save him?”
Viren went wide-eyed, and he was lost for words for a few moments. “I mean, it’s a dark magic spell so it will require some ingredients…”
“What kind?”
“Healing things mostly, like roots, and saps, and-”
“Quit lying to me.”
The room went silent. Soren’s breath quieted from his normal sleeping volume. Almost like he was listening.
“Excuse me?” His voice was a whisper.
Lissa let go of Viren’s hand and pointed a finger at him. “You always lie about what it takes to do dark magic, Vir! You face the crowd and hope nobody sees the creature you killed in order to do a spell. You play tricks.”
Before he could open his mouth, she spoke again. “You tricked me for years and years, and you’re tricking the children. You kill a spider to do their favorite flame trick. You keep a vial of ashes with you to make those smoke bunnies. I see it now, because you aren’t careful enough to try and hide it from me anymore.”
“I’m willing to do anything to save Soren. I don’t care how vile it makes me seem, I’m saving him.” He looked her in the eye, and he wore the intense look that had left him as of late. “I know you don’t care for dark magic, but I’ll do what I have to for my son to be healthy again.”
They stared at each other for a long while. Soren slept as peacefully as a sick child could between them.
“...What will you have to kill?”
“I’m going to do what’s necessary.” He looked away from her.
“Please tell me you won’t go through with this.” Lissa whispered. “Dark magic isn’t the way to go.”
VIren scoffed. “It’s the only way, unless you’d rather he die.”
She gasped and showed a hurt expression. “Of- of course not.” she straightened up her face. “But think about it. What will it do to you? I’ve seen mages with white streaks in their hair, with…with this horrible looking skin-”
“It doesn’t matter what happens to me.” He returned his attention to the book, opening it again. “As long as Soren gets better, what happens to me doesn’t matter.”
Once he quieted and began to read, Lissa found this situation to be familiar. How many times had they had this exact conversation? At Soren’s bed, arguing over morality as the sick boy slept, his condition becoming worse by the second. How many times had she gone back to bed alone after Viren had cracked open a book, ending the conversation? Except this time, his hands trembled as he flipped a page.
She continued on looking, curious. He was staring at the book, his eyes distant. His hand came down to flip the page again, even though he hadn’t read it. As he flipped it, a shake in his hand caused him to rip the page a bit. Then he seemed to refocus and he began sifting over the words, nearly back to normal.
Lissa frowned once more. This night was the same as any other. He’d keep reading after she would leave, he’d stay up all night in a daze. He’d keep making excuses, he’d keep trying to justify what he was planning to do.
“I don’t have a choice, Lissa. This is the only way he can live, I- As long as I’m by his side, I’m not letting him go.” His hand gripped a page, crinkling and ripping the aged paper. “I’m sorry.”
It was too late he realized that Lissa had left the room.