Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

They are keeping something from him. 

He presses his back against the wall, hardly daring to breathe. Patti’s light footsteps echo down the hallway. He imagines her dark eyes looking over her shoulder as she pauses at the office door. She’s been the most welcoming out of everyone Mac’s met so far but he knows that even she will keep those secrets from him.

Familiar rage lights in his chest. There’s been too many secrets. Too many unanswered questions. When he’d first arrived, he’d been given mandatory combat training for his questions. An excuse to beat him bloody and bruised while looking nice on paper. He was brought in to fix the ongoing famine in Kenya, not learn how to break someone’s neck in a fight.

Patti would have the answers he needed. He’d seen them in her eyes yesterday when he’d asked her why he was there. He’s still healing from the purple bruises decorating his body. He’d gotten lost staring at his computer screen yesterday and Patti had found him. She’d sat down next to him and placed a warm hand on his cold one. She’d waited until he focused on her before asking how he was doing.

He didn’t have an answer for her. He still doesn’t. He needs answers. Mac’s whole life has been question after question and he’s never gotten an answer. Why did they have to leave Dad behind in Mission City? Why couldn’t he go over to his friend's house to study? Why does Aunt Gwen talk in  hushed whispers every time she comes over? Why had he been expelled from MIT? Why is here the only place to want him?

Mom never had any answers for him. She’d always promised that one day he’d understand. Well, he’s twenty now and he still doesn’t understand. Now Mom’s never around to answer his questions. She’d picked him up from his MIT dorm and loaded his things into the back of her Honda Civic. They’d driven twelve hours in silence as Mac had tried to wrap his brain around the events surrounding his expulsion. He’d been caught in the lab after hours(something that he knows Frankie’s gotten caught for) and the next morning he’s told to pack his things.

As expected, Mom didn’t have any comforting words for him. She had never been the most compassionate parent. Mac knew that. He loves her despite remembering how Dad used to hug him. And praise him and pat his shoulder and tuck him in at night. Mom had never done any of that after they had left. She just drove away from the wreckage of Mac’s former life in silence.

Now he’s here. Mom had given him a corner of the main R&D lab and assigned him to the Kenya Project. He’s supposed to be working with a team but he’s never met anyone else working the project. He’s met the other scientists and lab techs who work around him but they all have their own projects. They just nod a good morning to him and leave him in his corner of the lab.

But Patti cared. She’d introduced herself to him on his sixth day in the building, brought him a muffin from the bakery near her apartment, and asked how his project was coming along. She had listened as he launched into the explanation of his efforts and had wished him luck. Then she came back a few days later. They had become friends. Or at least, Mac counted her as a friend. 

Patti's heels tap lightly on the floor as she knocks softly on the office door. She’d told him to keep his head down and focus on his own project. She’d promised that he would be okay. So Mac had followed her as she left the lab. The lessons Mom had given him growing up were coming in handy. Each day he’d watched her come to the basement and enter the same office. She would leave again ten minutes later.

It wasn’t her office. He’s been to her office before. It’s three floors up from the lab and has a nice view of the river outside. Her desk is large yet clean. According to the casual questions, he’s dropped the last few days, this office in the basement is no ones. A room people use to meet with potential clients. A room the higher-ups keep for after-hours meetings. A space that Patti is taking advantage of.

The door closes down the hallway. Mac breathes out twice before moving closer. His movements don’t make a sound as he creeps down the hallway. He stops just before the door, making sure that his shadow can’t be seen from under the door. Then he leans forward and presses his ear against the door.

“-working on it. Webber said not to bring too many people into this too soon. I’m barely in as it is.” Patti’s voice is almost too low for Mac to hear. She pauses as if listening to someone else talk. He guesses that she’s probably on the phone with someone else. “That’s the thing, no one can. She refuses to talk about anything related to forty-seven. Her sister is even worse. Neither of them will budge.”

Mac holds his breath as she pauses to listen. He’s never heard frustration in her voice. Never heard her sound anything but cool and collected. Other people in the building call her the Ice Queen for that very reason.

“Well, that’s what you’re going to be for. Maybe you’ll succeed where I haven’t. The kid’s desperate for attention so he’ll probably imprint on you like a little puppy.” Patti sighs deeply. “You’ll have to watch out for that. You know how you get with kids.”

Mac’s throat clogs. He knows who she’s talking about. He’s heard the nickname whispered behind his back. He’s the kid. He’s the youngest in the building. In the whole organization. He’s Ellen Macgyver’s son. He’s tried not to pay attention to the whispers but hearing it from Patti turns his stomach. Who is she talking to? Why is she talking about him? Why is she warning someone about him?

More questions.

No answers.

He can’t listen anymore. Can’t listen to her say the same things he’s heard behind his back. She was supposed to be his friend and he’s spying on her. This is what he deserves. Mac leans away from the door, feeling stuck in this hallway. With everything in him, he wishes he was back at MIT. Things made sense there. He had his classes and he had people he called friends. He had been looking into finding Dad again. He had been considering doing something more with his life.

When the door swings open, Mac isn’t even surprised. Patti freezes at the sight of him, her cell phone still in her hand. Her dark eyes study him silently. He could leave. He could confess. But she speaks before he has an opportunity to do any of it.

“How much of this did you overhear?” She gestures to her phone.

He shakes his head, unable to meet her gaze. Lies come too easily for him. “None. Door’s too thick.”

She’s silent again.

Mac wonders how upset Mom would be if he left and never came back. She would be the only one who would notice if he left. She would chase him down and bring him back. Back to the questions and back to the corner of the lab they called his. Probably better to not leave at all then.

Patti sighs. “Spying is rude, Mac. I would have answered any of your questions if you had just asked.”

He scoffs. “No, you wouldn't.”

Then he does walk away. Leaves her standing in the basement hallway alone. Vows not to fall for someone’s fake friendship again. He should know better. 

There are no answers for him here at Codex.

He hasn’t talked to Patti since that afternoon in the basement. 

He’s ignored her good mornings, thrown away her muffins, and gone out of her way to avoid her. He takes to eating his meals in Mom’s office as she works. He parks on the opposite side of the parking garage so she can’t corner him on his way out of the building.

Not that he’s been going home much these days. It’s been three months since that day in the basement and Mom’s taken him off the Kenya Project. Gave it and his corner of the lab to the new guy with dark skin and bright eyes. Now he’s showing up in the mornings for combat training which leaves him black and blue on good days and spends his afternoons in the office next to Mom’s. She’s given him some natural disaster prevention protocols to work through and he’s glad she’s given up the facade of his being on a team.

But when he arrives in his office today, wrist aching from the rough grip of his instructor and ribs aching from the blows he failed to block, Mom has changed things up for him again. She calls him into her office before he’s gotten a chance to grab his bag to change. So he enters her office sweaty and red-faced to find Patti and another man seated in front of Mom’s desk.

The blood drains from his face and he drops his gaze to the floor as Mom’s disappointed gaze rakes over him. He can hear her nails tapping on the desk as he slowly moves into the room. He gingerly lowers himself onto the couch behind the two chairs at Mom’s desk and tucks his aching wrist against his stomach. 

“My son is taking combat lessons from our team specialist. Darren Tucker is a brutal agent but an effective teacher.” Mom addresses Patti and the stranger. “You’ll have to forgive his appearance. Apparently, Angus forgot that he was supposed to be presentable for this meeting.”

It’s on the tip of his tongue to protest. To remind her that he hadn’t known about this meeting. But he keeps his lips pressed together. He can feel eyes on him and keeps his gaze on his feet. Mom doesn’t typically call him by his first name. She had started calling him Mac after they’d left Dad and only brought out his first name when she was especially disappointed in him.

“He’s a twig.” The stranger states bluntly. “You expect him to switch to a field team? To my team?”

“Actually, I expect you to train him.” This is Ellen Macgyver’s voice. No longer the mother he knows but the boss he obeys. He glances up to see her blue-eyed gaze pinning the stranger in place. “Our agents complete their missions alone but my son lacks the necessary skills to meet the requirements for fieldwork. This is where you come in. Patricia has highly recommended you and I’m expecting you to be able to train the boy into what he needs to be.”

“And what exactly does he need to be?”

“Whatever I need him to be.”

It’s exactly what Mac expects her to say. She’s said it to him before. On the drive away from Dad. After he’d graduated high school two years early. When she picked him up from MIT. When she had shown him to the corner of the lab. That’s his job. To be whatever Mom needs him to be. A dedicated son. An aspiring genius. A diligent employee. A piece of clay she can mold into whatever shape she should choose.

Patti makes no reaction to that statement. Mac knows that she would never react outwardly. They don’t call her the Ice Queen for nothing. But the stranger reacts. What Mac can see of his face pulls into a deep frown as he studies Mom. He doesn’t seem intimidated by her. If anything, he seems to be sizing her up. Studying her for any weaknesses just as she is doing the same to him. 

Mom is not hiding her perusal. She is openly studying him as he does the same to her. But only Mac sees something light up in her gaze. Something he hasn’t seen in her eyes since they had been living with Dad. Ellen Macgyver has just found a challenge and relishes the thought of it. 

He doesn’t envy this stranger. Not only does the man have to work with him but Mom is going to be obsessed with him. Not a position Mac would want.

“Patricia will show you around the building and Angus will join you this afternoon. There should be an email from Darren Tucker in your email, specifying all that Angus needs to learn for to meet the qualifications.” Mom leans forward, eyes drifting over the stranger’s body before lifting to his face. “You have three months, Mr. Dalton. Good luck.”

Jack Dalton isn’t the person Mac was expecting. 

He doesn’t train like Tucker does, brutal and unyielding. He doesn’t lock every emotion away like Patti does, distant and unreadable. He’s something entirely new. He’s raw and honest. He’s confusing and clarifying at the same time. He’s something Mac never expected to find at Codex.

“How am I supposed to teach you all this in three months?” His voice is an indignant sputter. “Lock picking to basic hacking? And we defiantly can’t forget about situational awareness and kinesics.”

“Definitely.” Mac corrects softly.

Jack looks up at him. “So you do speak.”

“When I need to.” Mac offers him a tentative smile. 

Jack shakes his head. “Well, I’m known for never shutting up so you’ve got to speak up when you’ve got something to say, hoss. Now, you look like you’ve been beaten until you can’t stand so we won’t get started ‘til tomorrow. Give you a chance to start fresh.”

Mac doesn’t know how to answer that. He had been beaten until he’d been unable to rise. Tucker told him it was the best way to learn. Deal with the bruised skin til he remembered enough to get out of the way. But Mom hadn’t taken away his training with Tucker. She's merely added to his schedule. He’d asked her after Patti had shown Jack out.

She’d laughed at his question. Mac, you will still work on the protocols I gave you alongside your training with both Dalton and Tucker. She didn’t see any issue. It wasn’t like he had anything to go home to. Just an empty apartment that Codex paid for. So he emailed Tucker, asking to move up their training time so that he’d be able to meet Jack for their later morning training. He’ll spend his evenings working on Mom’s protocols.

He lets Jack talk out loud as the older man runs through his ideas for their training. While the man talks, Mac studies him. Not like Mom had studied him, but the way Dad had taught him to study people. He notes the laugh lines around Jack’s eyes and the way he’s quick to smile each time he says something funny. He notes the way his hands move as he talks and how strong his hands look. He notes the compassion in the other man’s gaze which tells him that Jack hasn’t missed this silent appraisal. 

There’s more to Jack. Things lingering just below the surface of what Jack presents to the world. Mac can see them but can’t make them out. He can hear hints of them in the way Jack speaks, laying out ideas that tell of years of experience. He can feel echoes of them as Jack’s own gaze appraises him. 

He wonders if anyone warned Jack about him. If someone caught his arm on Patti’s tour and told him all about the boss’s kid. If Patti had warned him like she had warned the person on the phone in the basement three months ago. He wonders if Jack needed a warning about him or if the man already knows that Mac’s an issue around here. 

He asks too many questions. He hasn’t bonded with anyone else. He’s gotten to work on projects that scientists who have been here for years haven’t gotten a chance to. Favoritism and yet Tucker’s not quiet about the fact that he’s dismal at combat training. He’s refused to go to any firearm training. He’d gotten up and left in the middle of the first aid training class. He couldn’t stomach all of the small tidbits the instructor was throwing in.

Tie the bandage this way, but if you tie it this way then the victim will bleed out faster. He’s done his best to forget about those pieces of information. Somehow, Mac doesn’t fit in around here. Mom promised that this was the best place for him but he can’t seem to believe it. 

“Anything to add, hoss?” Jack leans back in his chair. They’re in that office in the basement. Jack’s backpack is sitting in the corner of the room. Apparently, this is Jack’s home base for his time here. “I’m open to any addictions.”

“Additions.” Mac corrects again. “I’ll do whatever you need me to.”

“And be whoever you’re supposed to be, huh hoss?” Jack’s gaze pins him in place. “How’s that been working out for you, Mac?”

This time, it’s Mac who doesn’t have an answer.

-

Chapter Text

The first month passes in a blur. 

Mac can feel himself running himself to exhaustion. Between spending his early mornings with Tucker and his days with Jack, then adding in the protocols Mom needs him to work out, and the fact that Mac’s ashamed of his failures with Tucker’s training so he has to spend more time hiding the bruises from Jack, it feels like there is never enough time in the day for Mac to accomplish anything.

He finishes running through a nuclear reaction prevention protocol and Mom hands him one on how to prevent a volcano from erupting. The protocols are never-ending. He finally learns to dodge Tucker’s fists and the man starts in on chokeholds and breaking bones. Jack finishes teaching him one thing off the list and there’s always another to start learning.

They’re in the middle of three different goals off the list. Jack’s been helping him learn French, pickpocketing, and basic hacking. In moments of downtime, Jack’s asking him how to identify enemy agents or how best to escape from a locked room. 

But that’s not all Jack’s doing. He’s taking Mac out for lunch. When Mom questions him about his absences on his lunch breaks, he informs her that Jack is teaching him about developing undercover identities. What he doesn’t tell her is that he enjoys the meals. He enjoys leaving the stifling building and escaping with Jack. It feels like a dirty secret but he can’t bring himself to confess that he enjoys Jack. It feels forbidden. 

They pick different stories with each restaurant they visit. Sometimes they return to their favorite restaurants and keep up the same cover. Sometimes they are co-workers. Other times best friends. They’ve been old friends meeting up for the first time in years, angry enemies forced into a stilted lunch, a potential boss and interviewee. Some many different stories and yet Mac’s favorites are family. Cousins seeing each other after many years(they make up childhood stories and inside jokes and Mac has to remind himself that they aren’t real). Uncle and nephew taking a trip to see a loved one(Mac has to stop himself from pretending once they leave, heart aching a bit for the family he never had). 

Brothers who meet up every Wednesday to catch up(he’s never had a brother before and when Jack tells the waiter that he’d do anything to protect his little brother Mac finds himself believing him just a little). Father and son in town for a college visit(Mac can’t look Jack in the eye for very long during this cover because it’s been so long since he’s had a dad in his life and the look in Jack’s eyes feels a little too real). Stories upon stories and never the truth.

They pay the bill and climb into Jack’s truck. They talk about their cover and ways to improve it. Jack had plenty of tips for being undercover. Neither of them knows what to expect when Mac takes his missions alone but Jack is trying to prepare him for anything.

Mac’s heading for Jack’s office now, wondering what story they would put together today. Would Jack fill the time with stories of the ranch he grew up on or would he attempt once more to pull Mac’s life story from him? Mac is okay with both options. He hasn’t forgotten his vow that he made after that day in the basement but he can’t help but let his guard down a little around Jack.

There’s just something about Jack. That raw and honest piece that Mac discovers at every turn. In a building full of people he doesn’t know, Jack is the closest thing he has to a friend. He’s the closest thing Mac’s ever had to a brother. He’s gotten pieces of Mac that he hasn’t told anyone else, little pieces that slipped out before Mac could realize what he was saying.

He pauses outside of Jack’s door, eyes catching on the shadows on the floor. There’s someone else in the room with Jack. He had just come from his mother’s office so he knows that it’s not her. Mac leans forward, flashing back to that moment four months ago when he did this exact same thing. He presses his ear against the door, heart suddenly in his throat.

“So you’ve accomplished exactly nothing.” It’s Patti’s voice. He shouldn’t be surprised but he is. It clogs his chest and he has to force his mind back to the conversation he’s eavesdropping on. “I thought you’d be further along than this, Jack.”

“I’m trying my best, Thornton.” Jack is angry. Mac recognizes the tone. “These things take time. You didn’t really expect me to just show up and he’d lead me straight to forty-seven. Real life doesn’t work like that.”

He can’t breathe anymore. There’s a trickle of understanding creeping in as Mac listens.

“Dalton, the kid is the only person working on the project. I don’t understand how you haven’t pried the information out of him yet. Webber said you were the best at this.”

“Ahh, yes. Let me just take Mac down to the intagration room and grill him for hours. Let’s traumatize the already traumatized kid. Sounds like an amazing plan.” Jack’s voice is dripping with sarcasm.

“Interrogation.” Mac breathes, hating himself for the word.

“I warned you about him, Dalton. You know how you get with kids.”

“Screw how I get with kids, Patricia.  Jack raises his voice. “He’s a kid and he’s being taught he’s only good for his orders. He hasn’t lived. He’s been molded and as long as he’s here, that won’t stop.”

“Does Matty know it’s gotten this bad, Jack?” Patti’s question is soft.

“He’s so bruised, Patti.” Jack’s voice breaks at the end. “He thinks he’s hiding it from me, but I see them. He barely sleeps. He’s terrified of saying the wrong thing. And he’s been brainwashed into this unshakable obedience to his mother!”

He can’t listen anymore. Not while they talk about him. Not while they discuss all the things wrong with him. All the failures he can’t seem to shake. He stumbles away from the door, his footsteps quiet. The world is swimming around him as he understands what this means.

Jack had been the person Patti had been talking to that day in the basement. Jack had been the person she’d warned about him. She’d brought Jack here for Mac. To spy for her. To spy on Mac. His chest clogs again and he has to stop at the top of the stairs and hunch over his knees to catch his breath.

He’d been reading into the lunches. Jack hadn’t been trying to get to know him. He’d been spying on him. Trying to steal information about him. About this forty-seven they seemed to want to know about. He has no idea what they want but he’s mortified that it’s worked so far. He’d been beginning to trust Jack. He’d believed a part of those cover stories(Jack had sworn that he’d protect his little brother and Mac would have sworn in that moment that that had been the truth). 

He keeps moving. His mind is running through each moment with Jack. Each lie. Each piece of himself that he’d allowed Jack to get a hold of. The nightmares at night, the fear that he’ll never be the genius his father was, the secret wish to do more with his life. He’d let those pieces slip into the hands of the enemy. Into the hands of someone who lied to him.

The door in front of him opens and he’s startled to see his mother standing in front of him. Her blue eyes, so much like his own, so very much like his dad’s, widen as she looks at him. He has no idea what he looks like but follows her willingly as she pulls him into her office. She pulls him into a rare hug and asks him what happened.

He pulls away from her to see her face. “Mom, what’s forty-seven?”

Things change once again.

Instead of lunch with Jack, Mac eats with his Aunt Gwen. Jack eats with Mom. The pair of sisters had devised this plan after Mac had confessed everything. Mom hadn’t answered his question but instead had asked her own.

“How do you know about forty-seven? Who told you?” Her hands had shaken him roughly and he felt limp with betrayal. So he’d told her everything. He told her about that day in the basement. About the lunches with Jack. About the conversation he’d listened to.

She promised to fix everything. She said that things would get better. So she called up Jack and told him that she would like to eat lunch with him now. While they ate, Jack would give her an update on Mac’s training. Mac would eat with his Aunt and she would grill him on Jack. 

Things did not get better but Mac had known better than to believe Mom’s promise. Aunt Gwen was telling him to spy on Jack and Patti. Do the thing that they had done to him. They needed to know more about who they were and what they knew about forty-seven.

No one ever told him what forty-seven was. No one ever tells him anything. He still doesn’t have any answers to his questions. Why don’t they just confront Jack and Patti? Why don’t they just fire them? Why can’t he know what forty-seven is? Why does Jack and Patti think he knows about it?

So many questions and no answers.

They are keeping things from him and now Mac doesn’t know if he wants to find out what they are.

Jack’s the same during the day. He’s still Jack. The move from French to Dutch and Mac masters basic hacking. He’s still not great at pickpocketing but Jack decides that he’s good enough. They move on to kinesics and prosthetic faces. Another month passes.

There’s still not enough time in the day. It’s weighing on Mac’s shoulders. Not enough time to work through protocols. Not enough time to shower and cover the bruises. Not enough time to ask Jack questions. Aunt Gwen is as brutal as Tucker with her questioning and Jack comes back from his lunches with Mom with a blank look on his face.

Mac saw them together one day. Saw the light in Mom’s eye. Saw the discomfort on Jack’s face. Jack’s still so raw and honest and Mom’s enthralled with it. She craves their lunches. Craves the challenge. Mac can’t help but hate her a little for it. He doesn’t trust Jack anymore but he still hates the blank look he comes back with.

He’s tried to catch Patti and Jack together too. They haven’t met up again in Jack’s office and the countdown is hanging over Mac’s head. They have one month left. Mac’s getting closer to being cleared for the field. Tucker moves on to teaching him how to kill a man with one strike. He considers skipping training but Tucker would tell Mom and she’d make him go.

It’s getting harder and harder to get out of bed when he finds himself crawling into it. Nightmares haunt him each time he closes his eyes. Each time he talks to Jack, it’s on the tip of his tongue to confess he’s doing the same vile act as Jack. Everyone is keeping secrets from him and now he’s keeping his own.

“You doing okay, hoss?” Jack asks the question in English, abandoning their Dutch lesson.

Mac shrugs, unsure of how to offer an honest answer.

Something lingers beneath the surface of Jack’s gaze and Mac can’t make out what it is. All he can see is compassion crowding out all hints of something else in Jack’s eyes. “You sure, Mac? You’ve been extra quiet lately.”

He’s broken his wrist again. Tucker had broken it this morning and Mac hadn’t said a word. Jack had broken his trust and Mac hadn’t said a word. It feels like a big circle. Broken and broken and broken. He’d been broken before Jack had shown up to teach him new ways to break. Tucker had broken his wrist but the broken trust hurt more.

“Why bother asking? It’s not like you care.” Mac is so tired of it all. The questions and nonanswers and broken things. 

Jack’s face twists as his dark eyes run over Mac’s face. “Of course I care, Mac. Why would you say that?”

Mac knows that he is just like the others here when he doesn’t answer. He can’t answer. Not without being just as raw and honest as Jack. So he shrugs and looks away. 

“Mac.” Jack’s voice is soft. “I do care. Gosh, Mac, you’re like a brother to me. You really think I’d stick around this place because I’m being paid to be here? If it weren’t for you, then I would have been outta here a long time ago.”

Mac scoffs. “You’re lying.”

Jack shakes his head and makes an X on his chest. “Scott’s honor, I’m not.”

“Scout.” Mac corrects and looks at him. Studies him once more. He sees the raw and honest Jack and doesn’t know if he can believe him. “You’re just here because Patti wants you here.”

The other man frowns. “What are you talking about? Yes, Patti recommended the job to me but I wasn’t gonna take it until I met you.”

He’s after information. He wants forty-seven. He has to remind himself of those things. Jack has the same look in his eye and Mac has to stop himself from believing him. He’d already lied once. He’s lying again. They’ve lied to each other over and over again.

Mac’s gonna be lying for the rest of his life.

The thought slaps him across the face. Codex has become his life. He’s training to become a field asset. To infiltrate and cripple organizations around the world. He’ll become whatever his mother needs him to be and he’ll be happy about it.

There is a lie.

One Mac doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to change.

It all comes to a head when Mac interrupts Jack’s lunch with Mom.

He hears yelling from the office down the hall. Aunt Gwen doesn’t seem phased by it. She’s typing up the information Mac had given her today, eyes glued to her computer. Mac excuses himself and wanders down the hallway.

He doesn’t hear any specific words but he hears tones. Jack’s been teaching him to pinpoint emotions in other’s voices. He hears anger and unease and no. He doesn’t stop to think before he opens the door to his mother’s office.

His entrance tears Mom’s attention to the door, giving Jack enough force to shove Mom off his lap. His shirt is rumpled, the jacket he was wearing earlier is discarded on the floor and Mac recognizes the color of lipstick on Jack’s face. Mom looks up with tears in her eyes from her spot on the floor.

“Mac.” Jack breathes, pushing up from the chair with a trembling body.

Mac steps away from him, shaking his head.

“Mac.” Mom has started crying, reaching up to hold together her unbuttoned shirt. “Oh, my boy.”

Jack’s face twists as he looks from mother to son. “Mac, this isn’t what it looks like. You’ve got to believe me.”

Mac knows what this looks like. He knows what Mom will spin it to look like. He knows what it is. He’s seen that look in Mom’s eyes before. He reaches out a hand to his friend. “I believe you.”

Jack steps close enough to grasp his hand. They fit together and Mac wishes he’d met Jack sooner. Wishes he’d met this man before they’d left Dad. Before he’d graduated high school. Before he’d been kicked out of MIT. Then maybe he’d have been able to prevent this. He’d known about this for longer than he’d admit. The appraising gaze on his mother’s face, the blank look on Jack’s. 

If it weren’t for you, I would have been outta here a long time ago.

He pulls Jack into the hallway, trying his best to ignore his mother’s sobs. They scare him more than her glares. This is how she molds him. Twists him. He’s been whatever she needs for so long he can’t believe he’s leaving her in that room alone now.

But he won’t be her witness. He won’t let her turn him into that. Not to Jack.

“Mac.” Jack’s voice is steadier. Mac’s glad to hear it. “Talk to me, hoss. What’s happening in that big brain of yours?”

“You’ve got to take me to Webber.” Mac looks past Jack’s shoulder. “Patti needs to come too. I don’t know exactly what I know but we can’t stay here.”

Jack stares hard at him, then swears. He tightens his grip on Mac’s hand. “She’s gonna call the police, isn’t she? Say that I attacked her.”

Mac nods. “You’ve got to take me to Webber. It’s the only way.”

They both know Mac’s purpose. They know what Mac’s been made to be. They know what he’ll be turned into if he stays. Jack pulls him close and wraps his arms around him. Mac buries his face in the crook of Jack’s neck and lets Jack take his weight for a moment. It feels selfish considering the position Mac found him in not five minutes ago but Jack’s offering and it’s been oh so long since anyone has offered this.

“I’m sorry for not telling you, hoss,” Jack whispers the words against Mac’s hair. “I wanted to. But I wasn’t sure if you would believe that I wasn’t trying to hurt you. There’s so much more that you don’t see.”

“I want to see,” Mac confesses. “I have so many questions and no one answers me.”

“I’ll answer them all, hoss,” Jack promises and Mac finds himself believing him. “Let’s get somewhere safe and I’ll answer them all.” Jack lets go of him and looks him over, his own face pale but strong. “You ready to go?”

Mac offers up his free hand. “My wrist is broken.”

“I know, hoss.” Compassion crowds in Jack’s gaze but so does understanding. Mac thinks that maybe Jack knew more of what Mac was thinking than Mac was able to hide. “Come on.”

Hours and two plane rides later, Mac’s in Jack’s apartment. He has nothing except the clothes on his back. He didn’t even think about it until he was in the middle of his interview with one Matilda Webber, Jack’s boss. He’d paused in the middle of his sentence and looked up at Jack who was standing in the corner of the room. “I didn’t bring anything with me.”

Jack stepped closer to him and unfolded his arms. “I know, Mac.”

Mac wraps his arms around his stomach. “I left it all behind.”

Jack is kneeling next to him now. “I know, Mac. But I’m sure Matty and the Phoenix Foundation will be happy to contraband towards a new wardrobe.”

“Contribute.” Mac corrects and smiles. “You mess up your words.”

“Guess you found out my secret, hoss.” Jack smiles back at him. “I’m not as perfect as I seem.”

Now, sitting on the couch in Jack’s apartment as the other man putts around in the kitchen, Mac runs his fingers along the bright cast on his wrist. They’d eaten dinner together and Mac could have pretended that they were out at another restaurant. They were undercover as a pair of friends who desperately needed a break. It was easier to pretend than to remember the sounds of his mother’s sobs. 

Jack comes and sits next to him, a warm hand on his cold one. Mac’s lost in his own head and Jack finds him. Brings him home. When Mac focuses on him, Jack asks him how he’s doing.

“Better,” Mac answers honestly, trying to channel what he knows of Jack. Raw. Honest. “It’s hard, but I’m gonna get better.”

“I know you will, hoss.”

Maybe Mom had been right after all.

-

fin.