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Chapter Text

Hello! Welcome to this very VERY long, strictly canon-compliant coming of age Marauder story. Canon compliant does not mean that I support JKR views. I do not. 

The story starts on the following page but below I provide the following:

1. An overview of the story's four parts
2. A short summary of the ambition of the story
3. A chapter-by-chapter overview of the story so you can get a feel for the mix of POVs and the pacing 

This is a long fic - this first page is to help you find out whether this is something you'd like to get invested in - rather than having you read through 30 chapters to realise this story isn't for you. If you just want to get stuck in, you can skip ahead to the next page, which is the real start of the story.

A quick disclaimer: My writing and understanding of these characters have evolved since I started writing. I'd say the first half a year is very much me getting to know the characters - it picks up considerably from there - so bear with me, I guess?

The story has four parts:

(1) I solemnly swear

Quote: 'No friendship is an accident'

We meet our cast of heroes age 11 and follow them as they become the dear friends we know them to be. James and Snape become sworn enemies. This part ends shortly after the big discovery.

Chapters 2-c.74

(2) Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs

Quote: 'The best memories come from bad ideas with best friends'

The boys really become that tight-knit group we like to call the marauders: they set out to become animagi; Sirius and James become the popular, bullying gits we see in the Pensieve; the Whomping Willow incident happens and this part ends shortly after Snape's worst memory.

(3) Mischief Managed

Quote: 'They say I changed a lot. I say a lot changed me' 

The war has always been in the background (quite present actually), but it's at this point our story takes a much darker turn. The Marauders face their last two years of Hogwarts, James does some serious growing up, becomes Head Boy - and of course, starts dating Lily Evans. This ends with our heroes graduating Hogwarts.

(4) Until the very end

Quote: ' Let us live, since we must die' 

One Order, a wedding, two childbirths, one prophecy, lots and lots of death, and one big, heart-breaking betrayal.

What's the ambition of this story?

(1) A truly canon-compliant story. I am obsessed with the HP canon. A lot of it will inevitably be my interpretation of the events and characters - but I am trying hard to stay true to canon. Sometimes things that were left ambiguous in the main series will be left ambiguous here. 

(2) Set at Hogwarts, with a canon-compliant tapestry of Hogwarts experiences. I miss Hogwarts! Do you? I miss the secret passageways, the eccentric Quidditch commentators, the house rivalry, the many ghosts and Peeves, the mysteries and puzzles our friends must solve, the mealtimes, the classes, the nice - and the unjust - professors, the prefects, the student rumours that spread like fire,  Hogsmeade weekends, conversations in the common room by the fire and so much more. This won’t deal with 1970s muggle culture. It’s a story (initially) set at Hogwarts and I’ll try to stay true to the Hogwarts we read about in the books.

(3) Marauder-focused story with multiple point of views. We will mostly follow the Marauders and Lily. If you're here for one or two Marauder(s), this story will bore you. How much we get of one character's POV will fluctuate - it depends on what challenges that character is facing. While there's not a lot of POV of Peter, he's very much a part of the story! This is a story of four very close friends (and two very co-dependent ones).

(4) There'll be quite a few OCs but they are not a key focus of this story. There will be many OCs and characters we know so little about that they become almost entirely my interpretation. Inevitably, long fics require world-building and a wide cast of characters. I hope I will write them in a way that's true to the spirit of the canon and that you will like them, but as a rule, I don't expect you to care for anyone that isn't the main cast - it's their story you are here to read. But we are at school, Harry Potter was always about a big cast of side characters.

(5) Fabian, Gideon, Alice and Frank have their own little story. This is the exception to the above. Their story does matters for the Marauders, but it's also to get some healthy teenage drama from the start (they are in their sixth and seventh year at the start of this story) - basically they are going to be my vehicle to write angsty, romance stuff which I don't really want to do with the marauders. It's entirely made up, although as always I try to make sure that the characters make sense based on what we know of, and from, their relations. I also want to follow Alice and Frank a little, the way we follow Neville a little. Harry Potter was not only about the boy who lived, but also the boy who escaped the prophecy.

Chapter by Chapter overview of Part 1

As you can see the story starts quite slowly. I believe the Marauders became quick friends, so I needed to drag out the first few days and weeks to explore how it happened.

(01) - Overview

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Year 1

(02) Remus POV: The letter to Mrs Black - 1 Sep

(03) Remus POV: Un-normal families - 2 Sep

(04) Remus POV: Duchess and diamonds - 2 Sep 

(05) Remus POV: Sharper than a needle - 2 Sep

(06) Remus POV: The Whomping Willow - 2 Sep

(07) Remus POV: Damage unknown - 2 Sep

(08) Remus POV: A small inconvenience - 3 Sep

(09) Remus POV: Brewing challenges - 3 Sep

(10) Remus POV: Part of the team - 3 Sep

(11) Sirius POV: Chess-mate - 4 Sep

(12) Sirius POV: Showing up and showing off - 6 Sep

(13) Remus POV: The power of Hope - 4-5 Sep

(14) Remus POV: Together we are less alone - 6-8 Sep

(15) James POV: A mounting animosity - 8-9 Sep

(16) Lily POV: The bee that stung - 9-10 Sep

(17) Fabian POV: The badger and the beater - 10 Sep

(18) Sirius POV: What comes with the territory - 10-17 Sep

(19) Sirius POV: Unfamiliar territory - 22-26 Sep

(20) Remus POV: Lost and found - 2-4 Oct

(21) Remus POV: Bullies and bruises - 5-12 Oct

(22) Sirius POV: Truths at last and more lies - mid Oct

(23) James POV: A new rumour - mid Oct

(24) James POV: No risk, no story - mid Oct-2 Nov

(25) Remus POV: A Sirius Revelation - 30 Oct-early Nov

(26) Gideon POV: Badgers vs Lions - 6 Nov

(27) Remus POV: Risk and rest be damned - 6 Nov-1 Dec

(28) Remus POV: The inevitable happened, inevitably - mid Dec

(29) Remus POV: End of term, at last - mid Dec-end of term 

(30) James POV: Everything had changed and nothing had changed - Christmas break

(31) James POV: Beater betrayal - Christmas break

(32) James POV: Lessons in being a blood traitor - Christmas break

(33) Peter POV: The snake and the lion - Christmas break 

(34) Lily POV: Still learning to be muggle-born - start of term

(35) James POV: Glasses returned - start of term

(36) Sirius POV: Home again - 2-9 Jan

(37) James POV: More rumours - 19-26 Jan

(38) Lily POV: Mooncalves and missing muggle-borns - 30 Jan-mid Feb

(39) Remus POV: Werewolf troubles - 30 Jan-5 Mar

(40) Remus POV: Before the Quidditch match - 9-11 Mar

(41) Fabian POV: Eagles vs Lions - 11-late Mar

(42) James POV: Cotdors and Healers - 11 Mar-10 Apr

(43) James POV: The woes of Gideon Prewett - 11-16 Apr

(44) Sirius POV: A Sirius disappointment - 28 Apr-7 May

(45) Sirius POV: Before and after - 8-12 May

(46) James POV: From father to son - 16-17 May

(47) Remus POV: James returned - 16-17 May

(48) Sirius POV: James' secret - 17-27 May

(49) Fabian POV: Snakes vs Lions - 23-27 May

(50) Gideon POV: Fabian’s disappointment - 27 May

(51) Sirius POV: Peter to the rescue - 27 May

(52) Sirius POV: The curious incident of Remus' revision plan - 28-31 May 

(53) James POV: Alastor Moody - 11-14 Jun 

(54) Lily's POV: The best muggle-born - end of term

(55) Remus' POV: Peter forgotten - Summer break

(56) Remus' POV: A good life - Summer break

(57) James' POV: Eira Jones - Summer break

(58) James' POV: The one - Summer break

(59) Sirius' POV: Not like them - Summer break

(60) Fabian's POV: Seventeen - Summer break

(61) Sirius' POV: I solemnly swear - Summer break

(62) Lily's POV: A stranger everywhere - Summer break

(63) Gideon's POV: A surprise for some - Summer break

(64) Lily's POV: Quidditch - Summer break - 1 Sep

(65) Remus' POV: The sorting of Regulus Black - 31 Aug-1 Sep

(66): Lily's POV: The Forbidden Forest - 1 Sep

(67): Lily's POV: The Centaur - 1 Sep

(68) Lily's POV: Muggle Magic - 2-3 Sep

(69) Sirius' POV: School, slinkies and seekers - Sep 3-9

(70) Alice's POV: Alice Fawley - Sep 17-18

(71) Sirus & Remus' POV: Desperate Measures - Mid Sep-Nov 4

(72) Fabian's POV: A double date - Oct 25-Nov 4

(73) Sirius' POV: What he feared most of all - Nov 5-30

(74) James & Remus' POV: To keep my friends' secrets - Dec 1-7

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

For the first time in his life, Remus Lupin believed he was on his way to making a friend. He had met Peter Pettigrew on the train to Hogwarts, and had been relieved to find someone who was equally as shy as he was. Peter was a small boy with mousy hair and a pointed nose, who had engaged him nervously in a conversation about what the sorting ceremony would be like. Remus had found he had been able to calm the boy, telling him it was unlikely to be anything that required magic or pre-existing knowledge, and the two had then slipped happily into a conversation about the four houses.

Peter, upon learning that Remus hadn't followed Quidditch - the wizarding sport - also began explaining the game, and his own team Puddlemere United. This, he told Remus enthusiastically, was the oldest team in the league and it had been very successful too. Remus wasn't sure what he thought about this sport, played on broomsticks, but he had been happy as long as this topic ensured they had something to talk about.

To Remus' relief, Peter had been sorted into Gryffindor, which now was Remus' house. It had taken the hat a long time to decide for Peter, and Remus had been crossing his fingers under the table the entire time, especially as the other boy that had been sorted into Gryffindor at this point was a haughty-looking, handsome boy that Remus was quite sure would have no interest in someone like him.

He had been proven right about that boy, Sirius Black, as he seemed to already know a 'Potter, James', that was sorted into Gryffindor shortly after Peter, and the two boys seemed to be utterly uninterested in Remus and Peter during tea.

'How come you didn't know about Quidditch?' Peter asked as they were climbing the stairs to their dormitory, resuming their previous conversation from the train.

'Please tell me you are muggle-born.'

Sirius Black had turned around, suddenly looking interested.

'I am not. My father is a wizard,' said Remus, wondering why this was of interest to the proud-looking boy, but deciding not to inquire.

'So your mum's a muggle, then?' the boy pushed.

'What's it to you anyways?' Peter asked hotly, but Remus just nodded.

Black shrugged.

'Wow!' exclaimed the Potter-boy, clearly having missed the previous exchange. He turned to the three others as they entered their dormitory, his hazel eyes alight with excitement behind his glasses: 'I can't believe we're here! We've made it! We - are Gryffindors!'

'Imagine how my family will feel when they find out, if you are having trouble believing it,' said Black, his face suddenly darkening. Then he brightened.

'That's an idea.'

'What's an idea?' Potter asked, sitting up in the bed he had just thrown himself into with such enthusiasm that his glasses had fallen to the floor. Potter bent down and picked them up, hastily.

Black waved a hand and said: 'Give me a few minutes, will you?'

Remus and Peter had found their own beds.

'Oi, Pettigrew, you're not muggle-born by any chance?' Black called over from his bed, where he had made a make-shift table out of a large book, quill and parchment in hand.

This time, Potter eyed him warily: 'Blimey... Don't tell me you care about that sort of nonsense?'

'I don't,' muttered Black, frowning as his hand moved across the parchment, 'but my mother does. So are you?'

The last bit was directed at Peter.

'No luck,' replied Peter.

Remus couldn't help but notice that the whole atmosphere had changed. Having grown up in isolation from other witches and wizards, he didn't quite know what was happening, but he took it that the subject of whether your parents were - or weren't - wizards seemed to be a sensitive one.

'But you're not pureblood?' asked Black.

'No,' confirmed Peter, looking defiant.

'Great,' Black said with such sincerity that Peter seemed a little proud, despite the frown he was trying to maintain.

'A bit hypocritical of you, not liking purebloods,' Potter frowned. His tone was light, but the enthusiasm he had shown earlier had vanished.

Black didn't answer for a bit, and Peter started getting changed into his pyjamas. Remus and Potter both sat in silence. Remus had planned to change once he had drawn the curtain, and Potter seemed unwilling to do anything until he had gotten some form of explanation from the Black-boy.

'I don't mind you,' said Black finally, his eyes scanning the letter.

'How gracious.’

'The Potters are blood-traitors,' Black added distractedly.

Potter flushed with anger, but also, Remus recognised, pride.

'So what if we are?'

'Hold your hippogriffs, will you? I am not saying that's a bad thing. Hold on.'

Black put down his letter, and found a corner of his deep-red velvet curtains.

'None of you happens to know a severing charm, by any chance?' he asked, and Remus found himself nodding. His father had, after all, started teaching him magic at home, believing he would never attend Hogwarts.

'I am not very good at it,' Remus added as Black's grey eyes fixed on him.

'Doesn't matter much, as long as you can help me tear off a small bit.'

The corner was roughly torn off, but it was unmistakably a patch of red velvet.

'Great.’  

There was something malicious in the way Black’s eyes glinted. He stood up, and, when he was sure all the boys were giving him their full attention, he held the parchment up in front of him, like he was reading some sort of declaration:

'Mother,

You will be grieved to know that I was sorted into Gryffindor on September 1, 1971. I have enclosed some of my Gryffindor bedding as proof of my house allegiance. Cissy-'

Here, Black stopped for a second and looked up: 'that's my cousin, Narcissa Black, she's in Slytherin, of course.'

Then he continued:

'Cissy will no doubt write to aunt Druella about this scandalous affair, and our family will wonder where you and Father went wrong in raising me.

However, there is still more loathsome news. Not only have I failed to get sorted into Slytherin, but I share a bedroom with a blood-traitor and two half-bloods, one of whom has a muggle parent.

I won't see you at Christmas.

Non-cordially,
Your son, Sirius

PS: Feel free to send a Howler at Breakfast. I would love for the rest of the school to learn about this misfortune.'

Black sighed as he finished, looking up at them: 'It's really such a shame none of you are muggle-born.'

An uncomfortable silence followed this. Remus felt absolutely bewildered. Then, James Potter burst out laughing, though Remus failed to see what was funny.

'Sirius-mate, your family sounds absolutely awful.'

'They are! Pureblood maniacs the lot of them.'

'Well, then,' said Potter with a mischievous look: 'we ought to send this tonight.'

'You can't,' said Remus. 'It's past curfew.'

Potter and Black exchanged looks.

'You're right, of course,' Black agreed.

'What were we thinking,' Potter continued.

'We weren't thinking,' Black corrected.

'No, but Lupin was,' Potter agreed.

'Alright then, we better get ready for bed,' said Black grinning at Potter.

'Nothing's like a good night of sleep,' Potter nodded sincerely before he grinned back.

Remus had a sneaking suspicion he was missing something, and sure enough, a little while later, when they had all gone to bed, Remus could hear the dormitory door open and shut again. When he looked out from his curtain, he saw two empty beds, and Peter's face, scanning the room just like he did.

Peter groaned.

'Quite,' Remus agreed.

'Gits,' Peter muttered.

'Quite,' Remus agreed again.

But as he laid in bed, thinking of the next full moon, Remus wondered whether Sirius Black had bargained for a more controversial room-mate than he was prepared to stomach. Of course he had, Remus thought morosely, nobody wanted to share a bedroom with a werewolf.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had been convinced Black and Potter would have been caught, expelled and sent home on the first train back for their evening excursions, but miraculously (or judging by Peter's expression, unfortunately), both had been getting up with Remus and Peter the following morning, boasting about not having run into a single teacher.

'First day back, y'know,' said James Potter knowingly, 'they don't expect anyone to be sneaking around so soon.'

As neither boy had been expelled, Remus found himself walking down to breakfast, not only with his new friend Peter, but in a group of four. This was entirely new territory. He wasn't sure what groups even talked about. Luckily, Black and Potter were immersed in their own little discussion, so he could talk freely with Peter, whilst retaining the comfort and safety of being in a larger pack.

Peter had been interested in learning more about how a wizard like Lyall Lupin had met and married a muggle, and Remus, who had always enjoyed the story of how his parents met, happily related it to Peter. It was, after all, one of the very few things Remus could share about his family.

'It took him a few months, but finally he confessed to mum that she hadn't actually been in any danger. Anyways,' Remus shrugged: 'I think by then they had fallen in love. And that was that really.'

'That's so cool!' Said Peter in awe. 'It was the same with my mum and dad... as in, my mum's a witch and my dad was a muggle. But the way they met wasn't nearly as interesting.'

Remus couldn't help notice the past tense. Neither did it seem, could James Potter.

'Was a muggle?' Potter turned around curiously.

Remus stared. This wasn't a topic one should force anyone to talk about, but the boy with the messy hair and glasses seemed entirely unaware of the lack of tact he was showing.

'He died... this winter,' Peter hung his head.

'Do you miss him?' asked Black, and this time, they all looked at him. Black shrugged: 'I am not sure I'd miss Father.'

'Yeah, I do,' Peter mumbled.

'I am so sorry, Peter,' said Remus, and then, with a heart as heavy as led, he decided this was as good a time as any to start the lie he would have to tell: 'My mother isn't doing very well at the moment either.'

He hated himself for the look of sympathy he got from the boy who had, recently, lost his father. But the full moon was only a few days away. He needed his excuse to be believable.

'Blimey,' exclaimed Potter. 'Does anyone here have a normal family?'

It would have hurt, of course, Potter's comment. Except, Remus' mother was fine. Potter, at least, would not be giving him any misplaced sympathy, and Remus felt something that approached gratitude for it. Even if Potter didn't deserve it.

'Nobody's family is normal, mate,' Black argued, and Remus remembered the letter from the day before.

'Suppose not,' Potter seemed to consider this carefully. 'Yeah, you're right, I mean my parents are really old and all. Y'know, they didn't even think they could have kids,' Potter grinned: 'But then they had me. Mum always said she couldn't believe it, she was so happy.'

'That was before they got to know you, though,' Remus remarked dryly before he could stop himself. Terrified he had just offended the boy, he was surprised when Potter just laughed.

'Just you wait, Lupin, there will come a day you will be overjoyed that I am in your life.'

Just then, Potter stumbled, and his leg seemed to fall through a step.

'Yeah, mate, I am sure Lupin is thanking his lucky star he's got a git like you to help him around,' Black laughed as he and Remus pulled Potter up.

'I've heard about these trick steps,' Potter exclaimed enthusiastically, completely unfazed.

'I think the trick is not to step on them,' Black offered, and Potter scowled.

He wasn't the only one scowling, Remus noticed. Peter seemed to have taken a strong dislike to the two boys, and Remus couldn't say he blamed him. They had asked Peter to open up about something so painful, just to forget about it a second later.

'This is the thanks I get?' Potter asked.

'I pulled you up, why should I be thanking you?' Black retorted.

'I took on the risks, leading this group. That could have been your leg.'

Black laughed: 'You're a terrible leader.'

'Am not!'

'Are!'

'And yet,' Potter winked: 'I am still leading.'

Black tried to get past Potter, but Potter, seeming to have anticipated this pushed Black into the railing.

'Still leading!' Potter gloated.

Black grabbed his robe: 'Not if I can help it.'

They were starting to attract attention, but Remus didn't think they were really fighting. Both of them were grinning widely, as they tried to pass each other to maintain the lead over the other.

'Stop it!' said Peter, his arms crossed, and still scowling.

Both Black and Potter looked in surprise at Peter, their smiles fading.

'Suit yourself, Pettigrew. Why don't you lead the way?' Black's voice was casual, bored even, like their little game hadn't mattered at all.

Peter seemed to hesitate before deciding to do just that. He made to push past Black and Potter, but Black stuck out his leg, so that Peter stumbled and lost his balance. For a moment it looked like he was about to fall down the remaining steps. A squeal escaped from the boy and Remus made to grab him, knowing already he had reacted too slowly.

Potter, however, had already stuck out his hands, and Peter regained his balance. Remus closed his eyes in relief.

'Careful, it's dangerous, going first.'

Potter's voice was as cold as ice. Peter tore himself free from Potter's grip and hurried down the stairs before either boy could do anything worse.

As soon as he was out of earshot, Potter rounded on Black.

'That was not okay,' he said angrily, and Black startled at the sudden change of tone. 'He could have been hurt if I hadn't caught him.'

'I wouldn't have let him fall, you just beat me to it,' Black shrugged dismissively, 'Besides, don't tell me you like the git.'

'We should get moving,' Remus mumbled. He wanted to go after Peter and make sure he was okay.

'He could be a useful ally, you know,' said Potter, as they continued down the stairs. The look he gave Black told Remus that Potter's anger had already evaporated: 'when you stage your mutiny against me.'

Black snorted: 'As if I'd need help taking on you.'

'My father was a renowned duellist in his time!'

'Bully for your father,' Black shrugged. 'All the more humiliating when I beat you.'

Remus only half-heartedly listened to their conversation. He wasn't sure if he enjoyed Black and Potter's company much. They had been downright horrible to Peter, who was clearly struggling with the loss of his father. But there was something about the pair of them that Remus couldn't help but be fascinated by. In any case, he wasn't willing to make these two his enemies, so he walked down with them, determined that he would find Peter at breakfast and sit with him.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Peter was not at breakfast however, and Remus felt worse for not having gone after the boy in the first place. Black and Potter did not seem to have noticed.

'Can you believe it,' Potter said happily as he helped himself to porridge. 'Only two days of school before the weekend.'

'Yeah, but have you seen what lessons we have before then?' Black moaned, studying the timetables they had just been handed by the sixth year Gryffindor prefect Gideon Prewett.

'I noticed we have a free period this afternoon, and two free periods tomorrow,' Potter said, enthusiastically.

'Yeah, but tomorrow we've also got double Potions with the Slytherins,' Black said, looking glummer than Remus had seen him thus far.

'What's so bad about that? Gives us a chance to show off against those Slytherin losers,' Potter shrugged.

'That assumes you've got skills to show off,' Remus pointed out to Potter.

Black and Potter exchanged a look. Remus wondered what they might do with him, but then Black laughed: 'He has his moments, our Lupin.'

'Don't you worry about me,' Potter grinned. 'Didn't I tell you my father is a famous potioneer?'

'A famous potioneer and a renowned duellist, I am surprised I've not heard about this fellow,' Black said, with a hint of sarcasm.

'Well, you wouldn't,' Potter said, raising an eyebrow: 'he's a blood traitor.'

'Touché.'

'But I bet you've heard about Sleekeazy's Hair Potion?'

'Have you?' Black asked, eyeing Potter's messy hair.

'Mate, my dad invented it.'

This seemed to have the effect Potter had been hoping for.

'Wait, what? Your dad is Fleamont Potter.'

Remus who had just taken a swig of pumpkin juice, nearly choked. Fleamont? What kind of name was that?

Potter clapped Remus on the back as he coughed.

'Aha, so you have heard about him?' Potter said with a wry smile. 'The name Potter didn't give you a clue?'

'I realised you must be related, but isn't he really old?'

Potter shrugged: 'So? I told you that already.'

'Yeah, but this is like really really old.'

'So what's wrong with double potions?' Remus asked quickly, trying to steer the conversation in a different direction. While Black and Potter seemed to have taken to each other, they also always seemed like they were only a couple of cross words away from a full-blown argument.

'Slughorn,' Black said, defeatedly.

'Horace - what's wrong with him?' Potter asked confused.

The two boys familiarity with the professors of the subjects they were being taught, reminded Remus once again how isolated he had been from the wizarding world.

'So you know him, do you?' Black asked.

'Well, dad and Slughorn were together at Hogwarts.'

'Of course they were,' Black muttered. 'Yeah, that adds up. Old Sluggy is ancient too.'

'And what's your problem with him?' Potter asked again, ignoring Black's remark.

'My family likes him,' Black said darkly, as if that explained everything, 'and he's head of Slytherin.'

'Blimey, he's kept that on the low. I had no idea. I just assumed he was a Hufflepuff or something, given he was a fairly decent bloke. I mean, he is no Gryffindor - I knew that much.'

'He probably knew you were a lost cause,' Black said, his lips twitching upwards. 'You've made it pretty clear you were a Gryffindor from before the sorting.'

'But it makes sense,' Potter said: 'I mean Horace is obsessed with my dad, and dad always said that's because he's famous - that they didn't really get on that well in school.'

'That's Slytherins for you,' Black said, then adding miserably: 'and he's going to want to know why I am not in Slytherin. He even came to our house this summer to tell me all about how he would look after me at Hogwarts.'

Remus couldn't quite muster any sympathy for the Black-boy. Compared to the problems Peter was facing, having to leave his mother less than a year after he lost his father, the disappointment of one professor hardly seemed to matter. And then there was the challenges Remus was going to face, trying to balance school with his condition.

Looking down at the timetable, Remus realised that he would miss his first ever herbology lesson. Furthermore, he was likely to miss so many lessons it would probably take him until the next full moon to be on top of things again.

Just then, there was a flurry of wings and feathers as owls started swooping in, delivering letters. All three boys looked up, and sure enough, three owls landed in front of them.

'Hello, Duchess,' Potter said affectionately as a grey Tawny owl landed in front of him.

'Duchess?'

'What, is she not imperious enough for the great Sirius Black?' Potter said, glancing quickly at the Great Grey owl in front of Black.

Black rolled his eyes.

'Don't listen to him sweet-heart,' Potter said, turning back to his own owl and pushing his glass of pumpkin juice towards her. 'You are my silver diamond.'

'Technically, diamonds aren't silver,' Remus said, before he could stop himself.

Black laughed, but whether it was at him or with him, Remus didn't know.

'What have you got there?' Potter asked, ignoring this and looking at the Barn owl with interest.

'It's not my family's,' Remus said quickly. Even if owning an owl was something they could have afforded, which they couldn't, it would have been wrong of the Lupins to own any animal. They had their hands full already.

'Shame,' Potter said, still eyeing the owl. 'Usually, I don't rate Barn owls that much, but you're a majestic one, aren't you?' Potter stroked the Barn owl, and Duchess hooted, as if to get her master's attention again.

'No need to worry... Thank you.' Potter took the letter from Duchess. 'Do you want to stay in the owlery tonight?'

Remus stared. Potter didn't really think the bird could answer, did he?

But the Tawny owl seemed to understand Potter and gave him a sharp look - or was Remus imagining it?

'Alright, alright, I was just asking. Keep your feathers on.' Another pointed look between owl and owner, before Potter smiled indulgently: 'Give my love to mum and dad, won't you?'

The grey owl nibbled Potter affectionately and took off. Potter turned his attention to his letter. Remus noticed it seemed to be a rather long one.

Quickly, Remus pocketed his own letter. The Barn owl ruffled its feathers and took off.

'Are you not going to read it?' Black asked, curiously. Remus mentally berated himself. He had seen Black opening his own letter, and had hoped that neither Black nor Potter would notice that Remus wasn't prepared to read his.

Remus had recognised the handwriting on the envelope as his mother's, and unsure what she would - and wouldn't - put in a letter, he had decided it was safer to view it in private.

'I... erm... she tends to write rather long letters, I thought... I'd read it later,' he said lamely.

'Wise choice,' Potter said, folding his own letter. 'There's no way I am getting through all of this now. I mean, it's great to know that they miss me, but I knew that already. Mum doesn't have to go on and on about it for pages at the time.'

'Well, my mother seems to think a couple of lines will do,' Black said, grimly. He held out the note for both Remus and Potter to see. The handwriting was an elegant one, but that didn't quite make up for the content.

I hereby confirm receipt of your letter from September 1st.
Be advised that you are expected for Christmas.

'Well, she didn't send a Howler,' James said.

But wasn't that what Sirius Black had asked his mother to do? And what did Black expect from his mother after writing such a rude letter the previous night? Remus studied the boy that sat across the table.

'As if Walburga Black would send anything that could publicly humiliate our name,' Black said darkly. 'No, my dear Mother would rather die than have the world know what a bitter disappointment I am. Mind you, by now the whole family must know I am in Gryffindor.'

Potter bit his lip, and Remus realised he was searching for something to say.

Finally, Remus understood. Black had deliberately provoked his mother for a response. If he had ever sent a letter like that to Hope Lupin, he was certain he would receive more than two lines in reply. He would probably never hear the end of it. But Black's mother seemed barely to care, merely ignoring her son's request to stay at Hogwarts during the holiday.

Potter had understood.

Remus had thought Potter devoid of empathy, but wasn't it he, Remus, who had felt no great sympathy for Black, because Black was healthy and had both his parents? Remus felt ashamed, he should have known better. Everyone's life seems perfect, if you don't look too closely, his mother had always told him. And Remus hadn't listened, because he had been busy feeling sorry for himself. He didn't have the perfect life James Potter seemed to be living, but looking down at the note from Black's mother, Remus suddenly felt extremely grateful that he had two parents who loved him for precisely who he was. Which, under the circumstances, was a miracle.

'Listen,' Potter said finally, 'we're done early today. Why don't we go and check out this new Whomping Willow after History of Magic? Should be fun.'

Remus' heart skipped a beat as Black grinned: 'That's an excellent idea!'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had been told that the teachers would know what he was. There was simply no way that he could miss the amount of classes he would during his seven years at Hogwarts without them knowing. Nevertheless, he didn't like it when Professor Flitwick, the charms professor, paused by Remus' name as he took the register at the start of their first lesson. Remus held his breath, looking around the room as Professor Flitwick continued down the register, but nobody seemed to have noticed the slight break.

Peter sat next to Remus, and the boy's red eyes told Remus enough about what Peter had been doing during breakfast to make Remus feel sick with guilt. This boy had been crying on the first day of school, and Remus had been busy stuffing his face with food at breakfast with the two boys that had made Peter's morning so miserable.

As Professor Flitwick was lecturing them on some elementary theory, which Remus was familiar with from his father, Remus tore off a small piece of parchment and wrote: You okay?

He passed the note to Peter, whose frown changed to a soft smile as he took the parchment and added: Yes.

Which was obviously not true. Thinking for a bit, Remus wrote: I am sorry about your father, and about this morning.

Don't be, came the reply from Peter.

Do you want to talk about it?

Remus passed the note to Peter and waited for the reply. Peter studied the words, seeming to consider the question.

Just then, Remus received a painful nudge from his left.

'Wands out,' Sirius Black whispered, nodding toward the tiny wizard teacher.

Black and Potter had seemed to be engaged in some sort of paper-based game, paying less attention to the professor than even Remus, but now they sat there like model students, wands at the ready, waiting for the professor's instruction. How did they do that?

Remus and Peter drew their own wands, as the last two to do so. Remus felt his cheeks burn a little, but professor Flitwick just cleared his throat and continued the lesson.

'I can't believe we didn't do any actual magic,' Potter moaned as they left the classroom. Professor Flitwick had shown them a lot of complicated wand movements, but had refrained from letting the students practice any spells yet, insisting on the importance of theory.

'Hopefully transfiguration is more fun,' Black said, 'but from what I've heard about Professor McGonagall, I highly doubt it.'

'I don't know,' Potter said with a sly smile, 'I think it could prove to be rather fun.'

Peter, who was walking next to Remus, pressed something into Remus' hand. It was the note from earlier. Remus unfolded it as he took a seat in transfiguration. Peter had written one word on it, a word that was promising to Remus: Later.

Remus had no opportunity to continue even a written conversation with Peter in transfiguration, because professor McGonagall ran a tighter ship than professor Flitwick did. She started the lesson by giving them all a stern talking to:

'Transfiguration is some of the most complex and dangerous magic you will learn at Hogwarts. Anyone messing around in my class will leave and not come back.'

Remus threw a side-ways glance over at Black and Potter, to see what effect this warning had on them. Their faces were passive, which should have filled Remus with more confidence than it did. Both boys took notes - or seemed to take notes -as diligently as the rest of the class as McGonagall explained lots of complicated theory. Remus soon became too busy trying to keep up with McGonagall to worry about anyone else, though from the sounds coming from Peter, he knew he wasn't the only one finding this theory challenging.

After McGonagall was done explaining the theory, she gave them each a match, which they were asked to start turning into a needle. Lyall Lupin had refrained from teaching his son transfiguration in the few months of home schooling they had had together, and now Remus understood why his father had waited. Transfiguration was hard. Remus could not make any difference to the match, and neither could Peter.

'Potter, Black! What on earth do you think you're doing?!'

McGonagall tight-lipped and white with fury was standing over the two black-haired boys.

'I finished my match, professor,' Potter said, with an attempted look of innocence that fooled no-one.

'You finished- wait, what? No, you can't possibly-' McGonagall looked paler still as Potter held out a perfect needle. The whole class stared now. Most, like Peter and Remus, had made no progress at all, and even Black, who seemed pleased with his own magic, had merely managed to turn the match silver.

'All the same, Potter, that does not explain why you were pointing your wand at Black's hand.' McGonagall seemed to have collected herself.

'I had no idea where I was pointing my wand, Professor.'

'If I didn't know better,' McGonagall said, looking so terrifying that Remus did not understand how Potter didn't crumple under her gaze, 'I would have thought you attempted to transfigure your friend's fingers. But Potter, I do know better, and I know that no student would ever attempt something that dangerous without the proper experience.'

'Of course not, Professor. I'll be more careful about where I am pointing my wand.'

McGonagall hesitated, then seeming to think better of it, she dismissed the class with the task to read and summarise the first chapter of A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration, and practice the spell.

'Professor,' Potter spoke up, rather bravely, in Remus' mind. He had just gotten away from something that most resembled a fire-breathing dragon, and Remus could not think why he would want to draw McGonagall's attention anew.

'Don't you think I deserve a few points? I did manage to transfigure my match after all, which was more than the objective for today.' Potter pointed toward the objectives McGonagall had set out for the class.

From the scandalised faces of all the Gryffindors - except Black - Remus knew he wasn't the only one who thought Potter was mad.

'She's gonna kill him,' a girl with curly black hair whispered to a red-haired girl. It was so quiet that Remus only heard it because he was standing close to both, having made to leave. They were all frozen now, however, waiting for the shock on their professor's face to melt away to anger.

To everybody's surprise professor McGonagall sighed and said: 'Very well, 5 points to Gryffindor.'

Some students even swore that she may - possibly - have smiled, if just a little. But most knew this couldn't be true. Professor McGonagall didn't smile.

Remus sat down to lunch with Peter and the two girls from earlier, who he learned were Mary Macdonald and Lily Evans. He had heard their names being called a few times by the teachers by now, but he still struggled keeping all the names apart.

Unfortunately, Remus had no way of stopping Black and Potter from taking the seats next to him and Peter.

'Good lesson,' Potter said, grinning widely.

'Potter, how'd you go and transfigure that match?' Macdonald asked, leaning across Remus.

'Magic,' Potter said simply, but Remus caught a quick look between the two black-haired boys that told him that he was missing some private joke.

'More importantly, you weren't really trying to transfigure Black's hand, were you?' Evans asked, looking disapprovingly over at the two, but unable to conceal some curiosity all the same.

'Not his hand,' Potter said, 'his nails. It'd be fun having sharp, metallic nails, wouldn't it?'

'Like claws,' Black agreed.

'But that's - that's - it's completely different,' Evans said, exasperatedly, 'human transfiguration is nothing like transfiguring objects! It could go really wrong.'

'How would you know?' a plain-looking girl with mousy hair sitting next to Macdonald asked, 'you're muggle-born, aren't you?'

'Evans might have opened a book before she came here,' Potter said, looking coolly at this girl.

'Or listened to professor McGonagall in class,' Remus suggested.

'Exactly,' Potter said. 'She might have used her ears. Who are you anyways?'

'Gemma Dawlish,' the girl said, 'and don't look at me like that. I am not anti-muggle-born if that's what you're thinking.'

'You are right,' Black agreed, 'that was precisely what we were thinking.'

'Good of you to clarify though,' Potter said, sarcastically.

'Like you're one to talk, Black,' the girl said, scornfully. 'Your whole family -'

'Oh, I see, you judge everyone based on their families,' Potter interrupted. 'How very equitable of you.'

'Ignore them, Gem,' the girl sitting across from Dawlish said.

'Do that, Gem-Gem,' Potter agreed.

The two girls turned away, just as two more girls came and sat down next to Black and Potter. This time, Remus was sure the two were sisters. They both had sandy-coloured hair tied back into identical ponytails, and one girl was distinctly taller and older than the other. The younger one had been in their class earlier.

'This is me sister Ciara Ryan,' the younger one introduced as she sat down.

Remus wished she could have introduced herself at the same time.

It was a clever scheme, having a sibling or a friend that you needed to introduce to your new class-mates, Remus reflected, as they all took it in turn to introduce themselves. Remus couldn't help but notice that Ciara Ryan studied Black curiously when it was his time to make his introduction.

'Ciara plays chaser for Gryffindor,' the younger Ryan said, proudly.

'Aye, I did, but sure, we've a new Captain, M, so who knows what the team'll be like now.'

'Fabian Prewett, right?' Potter asked, his face alight with interest.

'Aye, how d'you know?'

'Is he good?' Peter asked, eagerly.

''Course he is, otherwise he wouldn't be captain, would he?' Potter said, rolling his eyes.

'But what does he play?' Black asked, curiously.

It was only now it occurred to Remus that they were talking about Quidditch. A sport it seemed everyone in his dormitory, but himself, was interested in.

'Sure, he's a Beater, plays alongside his brother, Gideon, 'less he kicks him off the team.'

'Is Gideon any good?' Peter tried again.

'Aye, superb.'

'You wouldn't want to be a hopeful beater at the try-outs by the sounds of it,' Potter said. 'I'm more interested in playing chaser, luckily.'

'You're not actually going to try this year?' Peter asked incredulously. 'First years never get on the team.'

'There's no rule to say I can't try, so why wouldn't I?' Potter asked, seeming confused by this objection.

Ciara Ryan seemed to agree, nodding: 'Aye, I was just sayin' to Maeve she should give the team a go as well. She's a fierce keeper, like.'

Maeve Ryan - that was her name!

'First year keeper seems unlikely,' Black said, eyeing Maeve Ryan's small frame.

'Don't listen to these naysayers, Ryan. It's still good practice to go to the try-outs. Let's sign up together. I think we need to let McGonagall know by the end of the week.'

It seemed nothing was going to persuade James Potter from trying out, and Maeve Ryan, though a bit more hesitant, nodded cautiously.

'A-Alright, yeah. I mean, sure... let's give it a lash.'

'Speaking of giving it a lash,' Potter said, looking at them all in turn, 'Sirius, Remus and I discussed going to the Whomping Willow in our free period after Defence Against the Dark Arts and History of Magic today. Wanna come?'

Remus nearly startled at the use of his first name, which nearly made up for his annoyance at Potter having implicated him in this. Remus had no recollection of agreeing to go with the others, and he was worried Peter would see this as a betrayal.

'I can't,' Ciara Ryan said, 'I've still got classes. But ye should go. I'm pure curious about this tree. It's brand new this year.'

'We know it's new,' Potter said impatiently, 'so you up for it, Pettigrew? Ryan?'

'Sure,' Maeve Ryan nodded.

Remus looked at Peter, willing him to know that it was up to him. If Peter wouldn't go, Remus would tell Potter and Black he wasn't interested either. It wasn't like he needed to see this tree today, which had specifically been planted for him. But - if he was being honest - after the initial shock when Potter first suggested seeing the tree... Remus had to admit he was curious. He particularly wanted to see if this tree would be as good a defensive mechanism as professor Dumbledore and professor McGonagall seemed to think.

But it seemed Peter was interested, because despite a slightly annoyed look at Potter, Peter agreed.

'Great! Girls, what about you?' Potter asked, turning to Evans and Macdonald.

'What about us?' Evans asked, her voice lofty.

'Do you want to see this Whomping Willow after History of Magic?'

It looked like Evans was about to say no, when Macdonald hurriedly said: 'You're on, Potter!'

'Well, best of luck with Defence Against the Dark Arts. I've heard the new teacher's a retired Auror, after a rough scrape a few years back. But, she's meant to be the genuine article,' Ciara Ryan said as they all made to leave the Great Hall. 'It should be a leap ahead from Professor Flump, who might've been a decent teacher back in the day, though I couldn't rightly say. We've been waitin' on his retirement for years, but then, in the end...'

Ciara Ryan made a slitting motion across her throat. 'Bye now.'

'He was killed?' Black asked Maeve Ryan, as her sister headed towards the dungeons.

'A freak accident, really,' Ryan said. 'They say he went into the forbidden forest and got done in by some beast.'

'Probably a werewolf,' Peter said shivering.

'Or an acromantula, there's supposed to be lots in the forest,' Black said, looking more excited than horrified.

'There's lots that could have killed the bloke,' Potter said. 'The forest is full of monsters.'

'Sad way to go for a Defence Against the Dark Arts professor,' Black said.

'Yeah, but he was a useless old man from what your sister said, Ryan,' Potter pointed out.

'So good riddance, y'think?' Black asked.

'That's not what I think... just... it was stupid to go into the forest if he couldn't take it.'

'You alright, Remus?' Peter asked quietly.

'Y-yeah, I am fine.'

But Remus wasn't fine. He wanted nothing more than to run to professor McGonagall and have her send him straight home to his mother and father. The words 'freak accident', 'beast,' 'werewolf' and 'monsters' kept swirling around in his head. Freak. Monster. Killer. What on earth was he doing here at school with innocent children?

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Shut it,' Potter scowled at Black as they exited the classroom of Madame Maxwell.

'I haven't said a thing,' Black smirked.

'Let's keep it that way,' said Potter, as all the Gryffindors headed towards the History of Magic classroom.

'So,' Black said in a seemingly casual tone, 'Madame Maxwell is really something, isn't she.'

Potter nodded, carefully: 'She's the real deal.'

'And really pretty, if you're into older women. Mind you, compared to your mum she must be quite young.'

Black ducked to avoid Potter's fist.

'What did you do that for? I am just saying, I can understand why you'd find such a refined lady attract - ouch.' This time, Potter had found his target.

'Oh stop it, Black,' said Mary Macdonald, 'I think it's cute how Potter blushed every time she spoke to him.'

'Watch it, Macdonald,' Potter growled.

Remus couldn't help let out a small chuckle, and Peter too looked in a good mood. Having seen the great James Potter at a loss for words in class had given Remus the strength he needed to put all his trepidations about being at Hogwarts to the back of his mind, where he intended to keep them locked up for as long as possible. It was fun, laughing with Peter and Macdonald, and even Black.

Remus would have felt sorry for Potter, had it not been for the fact that he suspected a part of Potter enjoyed the attention, despite his protestation.

'I didn't expect her to be French,' said Peter, more to Remus than the rest.

'Neither did I,' Remus agreed. 'But she's worked for the Ministry for years, so I suppose this is home for her now. Maxwell is a Scottish name, I think, so she might be married to someone over here.'

'Bad luck, mate,' Black teased Potter, jumping out of Potter's way to avoid yet another punch.

'Still has a French accent, though,' Black said, once he was a safe distance from his friend. He smirked at Potter as he started imitating their professor: 'Yess, ma yong Zhames Pottair.'

'Her accent is not that bad.'

'Oh Pottair, zhumping to 'er defences. Haow nobleu.'

'If you don't keep your mouth shut, I won't help you with transfiguration later,' Potter warned Black, who just laughed.

'I don't need your help, mate,' Black said. He looked over his shoulder, and Remus realised they had left the girls behind in an effort to keep up with Black, who had had to continually run away from his friend.

Black approached Potter and smiled: 'Don't forget, I know your secret.'

Black put his hand into Potter's robes, and pulled out a pointy, silvery match. It wasn't far from being a needle, but it wasn't the exemplary needle Potter had showed their transfiguration professor.

Magic indeed, Remus realised.

'How?' Peter gasped.

'I swapped them,' Potter said, unfazed, taking the match from Black and pocketing it again.

'You just happened to have a needle on you?' Remus asked.

'I asked one of the older Gryffidors about our first lessons,' Potter shrugged.

'McGonagall is going to expect you to know the spell now,' Remus pointed out.

'And I will do, by Monday. This way, we got 5 points.'

'What if you don't manage?' Peter asked, and Remus couldn't decide whether he sounded concerned - or hopeful.

'It's not that hard, transfiguration. It's just logic. Anyways, it's my problem, isn't it?'

'Unless you're planning to turn him in, Pettigrew?' Black asked.

Peter vehemently shook his head.

'I didn't think so,' Black said.

History of Magic turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. Professor Binns was the only professor at Hogwarts that was also a ghost. Remus had mistakenly thought professor Binns must have carried on because he was passionate about teaching, but Remus realised quickly that this could simply not be the case. Binns droned on and on while the Gryffindor students scribbled down names and dates of some goblin rebellion.

After that particularly boring class, it seemed all the Gryffindors had decided to head outside to see the Whomping Willow. Even Gemma Dawlish and the other girl, who Remus now had learned was called Elizabeth Vane, had joined the descending mass of Gryffindor first years.

The only person who didn't look excited was Lily Evans. Remus had the distinct feeling that if Mary Macdonald let go of her friend's arm, Evans would immediately turn around and head back into the castle.

'I thought the tree was meant to be... well, a bit more...' Peter waved his arms wildly. Remus agreed, as he observed the branches of the tree swaying peacefully in the wind. It was hard to believe this was meant to be a violent tree they had to avoid - or rather, a violent tree that hid a secret passage only Remus, McGonagall, Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey knew about.

Potter and Black ran the last few yards, excited cries escaping them as they did so. Suddenly, the tree came into life and both boys had to dodge the branches to avoid being hit. The girls shrieked as the boys ran away from the tree.

'I bet I can touch the trunk,' said Potter, once Remus and the others had come nearer.

'I bet I can do it faster,' Black challenged, and exchanging a quick glance, the two were off again.

'They're idiots!'

The disapproving voice came from Remus' right, and he saw Lily Evans looking at both boys as they ducked and jumped and tried to get closer to the trunk.

'I bet they won't last more than 5 minutes,' Gemma Dawlish said gleefully.

'Don't say that,' Mary Macdonald groaned.

Remus noticed she was still holding Evans' hand.

'They're going to die!' Elizabeth Vane cried out.

'They're not,' Maeve Ryan said fairly, 'they might break a bone, but I'm sure the matron will patch 'em up proper-like.'

'Idiots,' Evans repeated, but she too followed the boys with her emerald eyes.

Ryan clapped as Black narrowly escaped a branch, while Vane covered her eyes. Remus too was starting to feel distinctly nervous. There were too many close calls, and should one of the boys be injured, he had no idea of how they would get to them.

'This isn't going to end well,' Remus muttered. It seemed Evans heard him, because she snorted, pulling a face that plainly said: you've only just realised?

'You never know,' Peter said, 'they're rather good.'

Remus, who had been used to hearing disapproval in Peter's voice when it came to Black and Potter, was surprised to pick up on a note of admiration from the small boy.

'Looks like Black is throwin' in the towel,' Ryan observed.

Black, robes covered in grass and mud, and out of breath, joined them: 'Nobody can get to that trunk, I swear.'

'Your friend hasn't given up,' Macdonald said, sounding like she wished otherwise.

'He will,' Black said confidently. 'Trust me, it's impossible.'

James Potter was athletic, which Remus assumed had to do with his Quidditch playing. Remus had to remind himself that it was a good thing that Potter could not get to the trunk, as he found himself cheering on his dorm-mate.

'GET IN THERE!' Black shouted encouragingly at his friend as James weaved through the attacking branches.

Then, as Potter was only a few inches from the trunk, a branch came out of nowhere, and everyone screamed. Potter threw himself on the ground just in time. Remus felt sick. The tree was clearly designed to prevent anyone from getting near it, and the closer James Potter came, the more danger he was in.

'Merlin, that was close,' Vane whispered, and even Dawlish looked scared.

Remus turned to Black, intending to tell him that he needed to convince his friend to stop, but the words died in his throat. Black had gone deadly pale and before Remus could ask what was wrong, the black-haired boy had started sprinting back towards the Whomping Willow.

'JAMES, ON YOUR LEFT!' came Black's desperate shout.

Potter rolled to the right - not a moment too soon, Remus realised - as a great knobbly branch slammed into the ground where Potter had been a moment earlier.

Remus could see what had frightened Black. Potter's glasses had fallen off.

'How good is his eyesight?!' Mary Macdonald all but shouted at Remus and Peter.

'I dunno... Remus?' Peter said, giving Remus a terrified look.

'Not good,' Remus said, noticing how his voice shook slightly.

He hadn't known about James Potter's eyesight, not until that moment. He could tell from Potter's fumbling and Black's shouting that Potter was primarily reliant on Black. The game had turned deadly serious.

Remus wanted nothing more than to turn away from the horrific scene that would be unfolding. However, before he was aware of what he was doing, he had moved towards Black. It was Remus' fault that this tree existed, and he had to help. Black was struggling to approach the tree, needing his attention to be on Potter and the branches attacking the messy haired boy.

'I'll take over the instructions. You go,' Remus said. Black immediately darted forward, and Remus kept a running commentary up for Potter.

Remus knew he could not afford taking his eyes off Potter, and still, his eyes suddenly shifted to see how Black was progressing, getting to his friend.

'BEHIND. DUCK!'

Remus' moment of inattention had cost James Potter. He was crawling on all four, and Remus, having taken his eyes off Potter at the wrong time, barely got out the warning before the branch hit Potter's arse. In a way, it wasn't a disaster. Potter was thrust forward, away from the trunk and Black was able to pull his friend away from further harm.

'Thanks,' James Potter said, wincing as Black helped him up. Remus hurried over to the two, and could hear his classmates' footsteps behind him.

'You alright, mate?' Black asked. Both boys were very white, except from the dirt on their faces.

Potter didn't have time to answer before the rest had surrounded them both.

'That was so brave,' Elizabeth Vane exclaimed.

"Aye, class," Maeve Ryan grinned. "Especially that part where the Whomping Willow gave your arse a good wallop, eh, Potter?"

'What are you on about?' came an indignant voice and Remus saw Lily Evans push the other girls aside. 'That was dangerous, and really, really stupid!'

'Why do you care?' Black asked, coolly.

'Yeah, shouldn't you be on some date with Snivellus?' Potter asked, squinting at her. Remus had no idea who - or what - Snivellus was.

Evans huffed and dragged a confused looking Mary Macdonald back with her towards the castle.

It took some time before Potter and Black were able to shake off the rest of the girls, but eventually, it was only Remus, Peter and the two boys left. At first, Remus had wondered why Black and Potter hadn't let the girls accompany them back to the castle - given how much Potter seemed to be enjoying the attention, but then Potter turned somewhat towards Black and asked in a rather tentative voice:

'I don't suppose we can get my glasses back?'

'Not a chance,' Black laughed, before sobering slightly: 'I am not going near that thing ever again.'

'No... I suppose that's wise...' Potter said, 'Thanks by the way. You too, Remus, thank you.'

'I don't suppose you have any spare glasses?' Remus asked.

''Course I do, up in our dorm.'

'Well then,' Black said, looking at Potter. 'We better head back.'

He started to walk, but he seemed unsurprised when Potter didn't follow.

'Use your words, Potter,' Black said, unable to hide a sly smile.

Potter looked down.

Black laughed again, and bounced back to Potter.

'Alright... no words. Lucky for you, I am both a skilled legilimens and your traditional - handsome - knight in shining armour. Here,' Black said, taking Potter's hand. 'I'll lead, shall I?'

He pulled forward, and Potter yelped out in pain.

Black's face fell as he turned to look at his friend: 'You alright?'

'Yes, fine,' Potter said, his free hand pressing on his back, 'just, no sudden movements, okay? And... I am going to need to be closer than that. The ground is uneven.'

Potter moved forward gingerly and placed his hand on Black's shoulder.

'All set?' Black asked, and Potter nodded.

Together, the four headed back to the castle.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

It was clear that James Potter was in more pain than he had originally let on, because by the time they were making their way up the stairs to the front door, Black was no longer only acting as Potter's guide. An arm around his friend, Black was carrying as much of Potter's weight as he was able to.

As they stepped inside the castle, tantalising scents from the Great Hall told them that it was time for tea. But they had more pressing matters.

'I am fine,' said Potter through gritted teeth. 'Just a bit bruised, which you would be too.'

'Alright,' said Black, leading Potter to a bench in the hallway. 'Sit down.'

Potter squinted at the bench hesitantly, almost suspiciously. He did not sit down.

'Come off it.’

'Once we've got your glasses, we're going to be sitting down for supper, so,' Black gestured towards the bench, 'I am asking you to sit down now.'

'You know that's going to hurt,' Potter argued, 'you saw where the tree hit me.'

'Your arse, yes, we saw it, and I am looking forward to reminding you of it for the rest of your life, because it looked bloody hilarious,' Black grinned, 'but right now, I am more concerned making sure you're okay, mate.'

'I am fine.’ Potter crossed his arms, stubbornly.

'You're going to have to sit for supper,' Black repeated, with a trace of impatience.

'And in classes tomorrow,' Remus reminded him. He had more experience than the boys put together with injuries - probably more than the whole year - and he agreed with Black. This wasn't just bruising.

'And,' Black added, 'how are we going to be flying tomorrow if you can't sit on a broom.'

Exactly how Black and Potter had planned to be flying without being allowed their own brooms - and certainly without permission - was something Remus didn't want to know. The threat of Potter being unable to fly, however, seemed to have its desired effect. Suddenly, James Potter agreed that he should - probably - see Madam Pomfrey.

They agreed to tell the matron that Potter had slipped and fallen down the stairs. A lie Remus was happy to support, as he didn't really want Madam Pomfrey to know he had been with a group of students watching the tree, and more importantly, letting two of his classmates get so near it.

'I'll get Potter's glasses and meet you in the Hospital Wing,' Peter offered, to Remus' great astonishment.

'Thanks, Pettigrew,' said Potter. Peter, looking pleased, started running up the stairs.

'Did Pettigrew just leave?' Potter asked. 'He doesn't know where to look for my glasses, does he?'

'I'll go after him,' Remus offered. This was in any case as good a time as any to speak to Peter and see where his head was at.

Potter explained where to find his glasses, with such clarity that Remus realised the boy, though loud and carefree, was more organised than Remus would have given him credit for.

'You're going to be alright, getting to the Hospital Wing?' Remus asked Black as they all made to leave.

'I am strong,' Black said as Potter reluctantly put his arm around his friend for support.

'And I am fine, really,' Potter argued.

'Yeah, well, that's wrong on so many levels,' said Black, shaking his head.

Remus found Peter hovering uncertainly over Potter's trunk, which he had opened. It was empty.

'I forgot to ask where Potter put his spare glasses,' Peter said, defeatedly.

'He told me just after you left,' said Remus, walking over to the nightstand, and pulling out the second drawer. Remus took out the glasses and held them out to Peter.

'No, you should take them. I will just make a mess of things,' said Peter, looking downcast.

'You won't,' Remus tried to comfort the boy, 'besides, you offered to get them, and I figure there's a reason for that, so take them. Please.'

Uncertainly, Peter stuck out a hand and Remus passed him Potter's glasses.

'Will you stay here, or?'

Remus shook his head: 'I presume we'll head to tea once Potter has got his glasses back - assuming he's fit to leave - so I thought I'd come with you.'

Peter looked relieved. Privately, Remus knew he would never have let the boy try to find the Hospital Wing on his own. Besides, Remus knew he needed to head there on Saturday, so it was just as well he learned the way.

As soon as they were out of Gryffindor tower, Remus thought it was safe to ask Peter something he'd been wondering about since Peter volunteered to get the glasses.

'Peter,' Remus started, carefully. He didn't want to sound like he was nosy, or accusing Peter of anything. 'Erm... why did you offer to get Potter's glasses. He's not exactly...'

'My friend?' Peter asked, smiling sadly.

'I was going to say, he's not exactly worth the trouble, but yes. He's not been very nice to you - actually, he's not been nice to you at all.'

'He's nice to you, though. Black too.'

Was it envy he heard in Peter's voice, mingled with sadness?

'I guess. I am not sure I'd go as far as to call it nice,' Remus said.

'And they are really good at stuff.'

'Like being clubbed by branches, you mean?' Remus asked.

As far as Remus could tell, Sirius Black and James Potter had shown some skill in their classes, but nothing more. Or rather, other than that, the boys had proven remarkably annoying, prone to get into dangerous - and stupid (like Evans had said) - situations, and they seemed to completely disregard rules.

Peter laughed: 'Yeah, but other stuff too. They're just...'

Peter shrugged, unable to put into words exactly what Black and Potter were.

'Besides, you helped Black save Potter, so it felt right that I should do something useful too.'

Remus looked at the small mousy-haired boy.

'You don't have to prove your worth, you know,' Remus said, quietly.

'I know,' Peter said, but it didn't look like he believed it.

'Just...' Remus said, as they finally seemed to be approaching what was, hopefully, the Hospital Wing, 'don't let them walk all over you.'

Peter hung his head.

'How?' he asked his feet quietly.

'I'll help,' Remus promised.

'Guess who happened to drop by the Hospital Wing earlier?' Black said, gleefully.

The group was on their way to tea. It seemed it had taken Madam Pomfrey no time whatsoever to heal Potter's injured tailbone, and while she had asked the boy to stay for a few minutes, she seemed satisfied all was in order by the time Remus and Peter arrived.

'How should we know?' Peter said, but Remus noticed how Potter's cheeks had reddened somewhat.

'Madame Maxwell?' he tried, and Black nodded happily.

'She came in to ask for something, just as Madam Pomfrey was examining James. It was not one of your most dignified moments, was it?'

Potter made no reply as they sat down. Instead he helped himself to chicken, gravy and lots of potatoes.

'Are you planning to have any vegetables with that?' Remus asked.

'Potatoes are vegetables,' Potter said simply before tucking into his load.

'Right.'

'There are meant to be lots of hidden passages around this school,' Black said, addressing Potter first and foremost as he filled his plate not too dissimilarly to his friend.

'We should explore,' Potter grinned once he had swallowed a large mouthful of chicken and gravy. Black nodded.

'Wanna join?' Potter asked Remus and Peter.

Remus shook his head: 'We've got professor McGonagall's homework, remember?'

'Yeah, but that's due on Monday,' Peter said. 'I suppose we could go exploring...'

'You all need to use your time better. I practiced the spell in History of Magic,' Potter said, holding out a now perfect needle.

'That's the match, is it?' Black asked.

''Course it is.'

'You weren't taking notes?' Remus asked, trying to think back to the lesson.

True, Potter and Black had taken desks right at the back of the classroom, but he couldn't remember Potter having his wand out. Not that Remus had looked at them - or anyone - much. It had been a surprisingly difficult task, staying awake to take notes.

'Nah, why would I? Sirius seemed to be doing a good job, so I was hoping to steal his notes.'

'I wasn't taking notes,' Black said, looking almost offended at the suggestion he had paid attention to professor Binns.

'So what were you doing?' Peter asked, curiously.

'Summarising that chapter for Transfiguration,' Black grinned.

'How did you manage to summarise the chapter?' Peter asked.

'I used a quill and some parchment,' Black said and Potter snorted, thankfully in-between mouthfuls.

'Yeah, but how did you know what to summarise?' Peter asked.

'Chapter 1, of course. Professor McGonagall said,' James supplied.

'But he didn't have the book open,' Peter protested.

'I read it this summer,' Black shrugged.

'And you remember all that?' Peter asked.

'No, he just made stuff up...' Potter said, rolling his eyes.

'How?' Peter asked.

Black, his mouth full of food, just shrugged.

'Anyways,' said Potter, putting down his fork and turning to Remus, 'look, McGonagall is the only professor mental enough to give us homework during our first week. I am sure of it. We'll have plenty of time to do her stupid essay over the weekend. And I don't mind helping with the spell, if that's what you're worried about.'

'Or,' Remus pressed, 'we could do the homework today, and have more time to explore over the weekend.'

The full moon was this weekend, and Remus knew he would be too unwell on Saturday to even contemplate doing his homework, and Sunday would of course be out of the question too. Unfortunately, he was also well aware that his reasoning would fall on deaf ears.

'Oh come on,' Peter said, clearly pleased to have an opportunity to explore with Black and Potter, but wanting Remus there.

'Why don't you three do the exploring, and tell me all about it this evening.'

Nobody seemed particularly pleased at this solution, but Remus couldn't budge, even if he had wanted to. So Remus - and Peter, reluctant to be alone with the two boys - went up to the Gryffindor common room, and found a quiet enough corner to do their homework.

Like Black, Remus had read the first chapters in his transfiguration book, however, unlike Black, it wasn't like he could remember everything he'd read. It did enable him, however, to skim through the chapter reasonably quickly, and Remus then settled himself with some parchment and started writing. Peter seemed a bit slower, only starting his summary just as Remus was reviewing his own.

Having successfully turned his match at least a shade of silver, and noticing how Peter was still working through his summary, Remus pulled out the letter from his mother. Remus was confident Peter wouldn't be able to read it from where he sat.

Yet, he hadn't needed to worry. Hope Lupin had not mentioned anything in her letter that could reveal his condition to the boys. Instead, she had written to him asking about how the train journey had been, what house he had been sorted into (Remus suspected that particular question had been his father's) and whether he had made any new friends. From every line he could feel his mother's love and Remus realised how much he missed her.

Remus had just grabbed a spare bit of parchment to write a reply when the portrait hole opened and their two black-haired classmates crawled through it.

'Peter! Remus!' Potter cried out eagerly as the two boys approached their small table.

Peter looked up from his notes, evidently pleased to be addressed by his first name.

'Come, you've got to see this!'

Whatever Potter wanted them to see excited the boy so much that he seemed incapable of standing still.

'See what?' Remus asked as he started packing away his things.

'We found a secret stairway that connects the ground floor to the second floor!' Potter said, his hazel eyes ablaze with excitement.

Black was more collected than his friend, but he too looked proud at their discovery.

'Come on,' Black said, and reached out a hand to Remus, who took it.

To Remus' immense relief, all the boys were back in their dormitory by curfew. From what he had seen so far of Black and Potter - no, of Sirius and James - he knew Peter and he would have their hands full if Gryffindor was ever going to have a chance at the House Cup. Actually, they would have their hands full just keeping the two alive.

Hogwarts will be nothing like anything you could ever imagine: it will be so much better. That was what his father had told Remus. And so far, it seemed like Lyall Lupin was on his way to be proven correct.

Remus sat cross-legged in his bed, his curtains closed, writing his letter home. As he detailed his journey to Hogwarts, described the boat trip over the lake, his sorting and some details about his classmates (leaving out the more dramatic parts), Remus realised that he was on his way to make friends. Not just one friend, but three friends. That was three more than Remus had ever been able to imagine.

This, however, also presented a challenge to Remus: how to keep these people - his potential friends - from knowing how damaged he was.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus woke up around midnight, his body feeling heavy and every movement causing his joints to protest. Lying still, Remus tried not to think about how much worse the pain would get when his body would be forced to transform into a monster. But it was hard to keep it out of mind when his body did its uttermost to give him advanced reminders.

Saturday he would once more become the beast - a product of pain and to cause pain to others - or himself in their absence. Hope had encouraged Remus to give the wolf a name, something to distance it from himself - a muggle trick of sorts. But Remus felt strongly that this was cheating. However much they could pretend otherwise, he was - and would always be - a monster designed to hunt and kill humans - innocents. People who were not like him.

With such cheerful thoughts to keep him company, Remus spent most of the night waiting for morning to arrive. He knew he drifted off occasionally, as he'd wake suddenly from his body protesting at any significant movement. One more night like this before hell would break lose.

It was still very early when Remus heard movement coming from one of the other beds. Remus opened his hangings to see James Potter getting changed into some baggy muggle trousers and a t-shirt.

'Remus!' James exclaimed in surprise before looking guiltily around at the other beds.

'What are you doing awake at this hour?' the messy haired boy asked - now in a whisper.

Remus shrugged.

'Couldn't sleep?' James asked.

'Lots to take in.'

It wasn't entirely untrue.

'I know right?' James said, trying to keep his voice down, his hazel eyes bright with excitement. 'I am going for a run, do you want to join?'

Remus could hardly have come up with something he less wanted to do. He shook his head.

'Your loss,' James shrugged.

Then, looking at Remus more carefully, James said: 'maybe you should try to get some more sleep? You look done in.'

And with that, James was off.

Nearly an hour passed before Remus decided it was time to get up, thinking it wasn't too long before the others would awake. He hadn't been able to get any further sleep.

Studying himself in the bathroom mirror, Remus had to agree with James: he did look done in. But there was nothing new in that. He thought about how quickly Madam Pomfrey had been able to fix James' tailbone, and wondered, not for the first time, why magic could heal some injuries within seconds, whilst some conditions remained void of any effective treatment.

Unconsciously Remus let his fingers trace the deeply scarred tissue just below his left shoulder; the bite that had forever cursed his life. Remus had other scars across his torso from that fateful attack, but had it not been for that one bite, he would have been normal.

Normal like who? James Potter? There was a rational side to Remus who knew that Sirius had been right in telling James that nobody's family was normal. But none of the boys knew that Remus wasn't simply abnormal - Remus wasn't even fully human. He was a beast, a killer-in-making and a half-breed.

'Where's James?' was the question that greeted Remus as he entered the dormitory again, fully dressed.

Sirius Black looked like he was in a foul mood. Whether that was because he didn't know where his friend was, or if it was because of the double potions he had so expressively told them he was unhappy about, Remus didn't know.

James Potter had started to make sense to Remus. He wasn't that difficult to understand. James could be summarised as a Quidditch enthusiast (whatever Quidditch was), with too much energy and the sort of confidence that came from a happy upbringing. Sirius though... Remus could only describe him in terms of others. He was James' friend and he disliked his family. And that was about everything Remus knew about the black-haired boy in front of him.

Peter scurried to the bathroom, evidently keen to get away and unable to provide an answer to Sirius' question.

'He went for a run,' Remus said, walking over to his bed.

Starting to fold his pyjamas, Remus asked: 'did you sleep well?'

Sirius ignored this question.

'A run?' he asked, the disbelief laced in his voice so clear that Remus began to wonder if Sirius knew this was something people could do. Maybe this was an exclusively muggle-activity? But then, James came from a wizarding family. Better safe than sorry, Remus thought-:

'You know, for exercise.'

'I know what going for a run means, but why on earth would he do that? Are the hundred-and-forty-two staircases around this castle not enough for him?'

'Everyone walks those stairs,' came a voice from the bedroom door. James Potter, sweaty but happy-looking, had returned: 'and I want to be fitter than 'everyone''.

'By engaging in muggle torture?' Sirius asked, shaking his head.

'You should join,' James said, getting undressed unashamedly in front of the two boys. Then again, he had no scars to hide. 'Gives you something to write home about.'

'I like my sleep, thank-you-very-much,' Sirius replied dryly. Throwing a towel at his friend he said: 'And cover yourself, you're making Remus blush.'

It seemed the run had done James some good. He was calmer than Remus had seen him thus far. The four boys managed to get down to breakfast together, which was, if nothing else, an improvement on the previous day.

It became clear to the four boys that the story of Sirius and James' attempt at touching the trunk of the Whomping Willow had spread like fire through dry grass. Only the Gryffindor first years, however, who had been witness to their attempts, seemed convinced that the game was not worth repeating. Everyone else seemed to think that they or their friends might succeed where a couple of first years had failed.

This lack of belief in their skills didn't seem to bother James and Sirius in the slightest. Sirius because he, Remus began to observe, didn't really seem bothered about the attention, and James because he had his own interpretation of it all-:

'If they are this impressed before they know how crazy that tree is, just you wait until they have had a go.'

It was clear James expected that the two of them would be hailed as heroes before the week was over. Remus, however, felt increasingly unhappy about the amount of attention this tree was getting. Professor Dumbledore might have considered it an effective gatekeeper for the secret passage he had described to Remus, but how long could it be a secret if the tree was the talk of the whole school?

'Hey! Black! Potter!'

It was Gideon Prewett who had called for the boys, the red-headed prefect that had handed them their timetables yesterday morning. He was closely followed by an equally red-haired boy, whom Remus realised had to be his brother, the captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Fabian, was it?

Sirius and James, who sat across from each other at the table, exchanged a quick look. Sirius lowered his spoon.

'What's up?' James asked, turning around so he could see the two boys.

'Are these stories true - about the Whomping Willow?' the prefect asked, looking serious.

Remus could no longer see James' face, but Sirius' grey eyes darted to the back of James' messy hair before looking back at Gideon Prewett.

'Oh, give them a break, Gid,' his brother shot in, placing a hand on Gideon Prewett's shoulder. 'There's no rule to say they can't go near it.'

The prefect sighed: 'Well, you don't look any worse for wear.'

'No, we were really careful!' James lied.

Gideon Prewett laughed: 'That's impossible.'

'Alright, fine, but we weren't stupid.'

Another lie, in Remus' opinion.

'And we're not planning to go near it ever again,' Sirius said, with feeling.

That was also a lie, if Sirius included Remus in that statement, but Sirius wasn't to know that.

'Did you hear that we nearly touched the trunk?' James asked, eagerly.

'We did,' the Quidditch captain said, looking impressed. 'I heard you were only a few inches away.'

'Oh don't encourage them, Fabian,' his brother said with a hint of despair.

So it was Fabian!

'I am very good at dodging stuff - branches, bludgers,' James said quickly. 'And I've got a good aim too.'

'Oh yeah?' Fabian Prewett asked, smiling somewhat knowingly, like he had heard things like this before, and knew not to take it too seriously.

'Yes, I am!'

Remus guessed James was either unable or unwilling to pick up on the Quidditch captain's - not exactly disbelief - but lack of confidence in the boy's self-proclaimed skills.

'Well then, you should come to the Quidditch try-outs,' Fabian Prewett said, kindly.

'I will!'

'We'll see you then - if not before. Stay out of trouble, won't ya? I don't think Gideon feels he used his badge enough last year.'

Fabian Prewett smirked at his brother. The prefect simply rolled his eyes, and the two boys left them.

'Are they twins, do you think?' Peter asked, curiously.

'Can't be,' James said, eyeing the two boys. 'Gideon is definitely older.'

'I don't know,' Remus said, following James' eyes.

'They're not twins,' a slightly plump girl said, as she shuffled closer to the four of them, 'but they are in the same year.'

Sirius gave the intruder an annoyed look, but Peter and James seemed pleased at having someone who could tell them more about the brothers.

'How?' Peter asked.

'It's not impossible,' James said, 'but poor Mrs Prewett.'

'Oh it's not like that,' the girl said, waving her hand. 'The way I heard it, Fabian got really ill the year Gideon was meant to start at Hogwarts, and Gideon flat out refused to leave his brother. The family let him stay home, as they weren't sure Fabian would make it.'

She looked at them all seriously, but her pale eyes seemed pleased to have an audience.

'They could have home schooled him... so he didn't have to lose a whole year,' Peter said.

'Maybe he wanted to start with his brother?' James suggested.

'They will have had their hands full if Fabian was seriously ill,' Remus corrected them.

'Exactly,' the girl said eagerly. 'That's why their sister had to come back to Hogwarts - because she was already in her... fourth year? yeah, I think so. And they didn't want her to fall behind too. Can you imagine? Leaving your brother like that? I mean, I bet she went home lots, but it's not the same.'

'No it's not,' Remus agreed, thinking about how tough it must have been for this sister - and the family.

Peter gave him a quick look Remus couldn't quite understand.

'Anyways, they are thick as thieves those two... And don't let Gideon fool you. He got up to all sorts of mischief until Dumbledore made him a prefect. Something I like to remind him of, when necessary.'

'Like what?' James asked, eagerly.

The girl just smiled.

'I don't think I caught your name,' Sirius said, coolly.

'Bertha Jorkins,' Bertha Jorkins answered.

'And I know who you four are: Peter Pettigrew, Remus Lupin, James Potter - and of course,' she turned to Sirius with a slightly hungry look on her face, 'Sirius Black.'

James, who had seemed to enjoy Jorkins' company so far, suddenly sat up a bit straighter: 'Alright - well... we better get going, haven't we? Double potions and all.'

James made to stand up.

'But Remus has barely touched his food,' Peter protested.

'Clearly he's not hungry. Let's go.'

Remus wasn't hungry, so he just nodded, and stood up next to Sirius.

'See you around,' Remus said to the girl, not sure he wanted to. Jorkins seemed like the sort of watchful girl he wanted nothing to do with.

'Blimey, I really don't understand why everyone gets their wands in knots about you being a Black,' James said as they made their way to their entrance, and Remus realised James was thinking of Gemma Dawlish - and Ciara Ryan - yesterday.

'That's because you don't seem to know my family,' Sirius said, looking grim. 'Ah, but here's the perfect opportunity to introduce you to one of them. Cissy, how lovely.'

'Sirius,' Miss Black said, looking down at her cousin.

It might have been easy to miss how similar they looked; disguised by their very different hair colours; she a blonde; Sirius, of course, black-haired. But if you got past that difference, they both had a haughty look about them, and they were both - undeniably - handsome. They also shared a look of utter distaste as they surveyed each other.

'Move along now, or I'll have to dock a few points from your precious house,' Miss Black tapped her prefect badge with a long, pale finger.

'Oh, are you a prefect?' Sirius asked, sarcastically. 'I am surprised aunt Druella didn't mention it. Oh wait - she did. About a thousand times.'

Sirius let a couple of students pass, but he didn't move and neither did Miss Black. A small crowd of curious onlookers started gathering.

'How is she?' Sirius asked. 'Aunty must be thrilled I am in Gryffindor. It must make such a nice change from one of her daughters being the biggest disappointment in the family?'

Miss Black laughed: 'You think you're this great big rebel, Sirius, but you're nothing but a small inconvenience. Well, off you go with your Gryffindor friends. And...' a cruel smile curled her lips: '5 points from Gryffindor.'

If Sirius had looked for something to cheer him up before potions, the encounters with Bertha Jorkins and his cousin had both served the opposite effect. He seemed liable to kick something as they walked down the stairs to the dungeons.

'There's something I am missing,' Sirius grumbled to James. 'It's more than a small inconvenience to them that I am in Gryffindor.'

'You sure? It's just a house,' James said.

This was rich coming from James, Remus thought. James put more store in people's sorting than anyone Remus had met so far.

'You don't know my family,' Sirius said through clenched teeth.

'You're right,' James said after a short break. 'But I suspect you can be more than a small inconvenience, if that's what you want.'

'Go on.'

'Well,' James said, just as they came to a stop in front of what had to be the potions classroom. 'It will take a couple of weeks, and I'll have to write to my dad, but I've got an idea.'

Just then, a short, balding man with an enormous belly came into view. He was lavishly dressed in purple velvet and polished, gold buttons that served no purpose as far as Remus could see. This had to be Horace Slughorn.

'I'll tell you about it later,' James said, keeping his voice down.

'Great,' Sirius replied quietly, eyeing the professor warily. 'I need something to look forward to.'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Professor Slughorn began, just as the other teachers had, by taking the register. He didn't stop, like professor Flitwick had, when he got to Remus' name. However, once the register was taken and Slughorn's eyes seemed to scan the room hungrily, something shifted as he moved his gaze from James (whom he almost regarded in a fatherly manner) to Remus. Slughorn looked away almost immediately, and his eyes landed on Sirius, where they rested for a while.

'Now then, now then, now then,' professor Slughorn said as he finally tore his eyes away from the dark-haired boy.

'This class is a little different from many of your other classes - here we don't rely so much on our wands as we do on our wit and curiosity. The best potion-makers know when to execute instructions and when to - dare I say it - tweak the rules a little.'

This was more encouragement than Sirius and James would ever need, Remus thought, as he saw the two friends exchange eager looks.

'But to begin with, I ask that you apply your wit to following the instructions. Until you understand the basics, experimentation can go badly wrong. Come to that, it can go badly wrong even when you know what you're doing, but not under my supervision.'

On the table next to the one the four boys had chosen sat the red-haired girl, Lily Evans, together with a boy Remus had only seen during the sorting. He was a skinny boy with black, overgrown hair and a large nose. Whereas Evans seemed relieved at being told she was not expected to do anything but follow the instructions, her shoulders relaxing slightly, the boy looked annoyed, like he had just been denied a particularly delicious treat.

The warning of course had no effect on Sirius and James. Not that Remus had expected it to.

'While potions may seem nothing like magic, I can promise that the effects of a small bottle of liquid brewed inside - or outside - this classroom can contain some of the most powerful magic there is. Drink - or being forced to drink - the wrong potion, and you may find yourself able to tell nothing but the truth, being infatuated with someone you may not even have noticed or even, an untimely death.'

Professor Slughorn looked around the room to see what effect his speech was having. Some of the students looked scared, others fascinated. Only the two boys that shared a table with Evans and the skinny boy seemed bored and unimpressed.

'Carry the right antidote, and you can avoid all that,' professor Slughorn continued. 'Learn to brew the right potions, and you may find untold strength, wisdom or even luck available to you in a bottle, should you need it. The power of the expert potioneer should not be underestimated. No, it should not.'

'Not that I need to tell you that, m'boy,' professor Slughorn suddenly turned to James, who looked momentarily confused.

'Your father has made a fortune, hasn't he, by inventing just one powerful potion - and that was a man, let me tell you all, who burst with 'traditional' magic. Yet, it was not as a dueller Fleamont Potter became famous, was it? Eh?'

'Well, Sir, I think most people know not to challenge him to a duel, and in a way, that's a kind of fame too,' said James.

'Indeed it is, m'boy,' agreed professor Slughorn indulgently.

'Now then, I think I've done enough talking for one morning. Why don't you all grab your scales and potions ingredients, and lets put those young brains of yours to work. Today I want you to start brewing a simple cure for boils. I want you to pair up for this particular potion, so select a potions partner and enjoy your first foray into the liquid world of magic.'

Professor Slughorn tapped the board behind him, and suddenly, instructions appeared for everyone to see.

As the class began setting up their cauldrons and preparing their ingredients - weighing dried nettles and crushing snake fangs - professor Slughorn made his way around the classroom, stopping at some tables and talking to the students. It seemed to Remus that their potions professor was more keen to talk about people's families than the potion they were making, an impression that was made stronger still when professor Slughorn spent a whole fifteen minutes talking to James about his father.

James chatted happily to the professor, and it took Remus some time before he noticed that even the professor was growing weary of the conversation, making at least three attempts to escape. James showed no mercy, however. Every time professor Slughorn made to turn to Sirius, James came up with another question about Slughorn and Fleamont Potter, or shared some new story about his father.

It was only when James suddenly startled (a bit too obviously, in Remus' view) and said: 'Professor, I am so sorry, I've been neglecting Sirius. We're going to really have to get a move on if we're going to keep up with the rest,' that Remus realised what James had been doing.

Professor Slughorn, looking disappointed, left the two boys, and ignoring Peter and Remus, moved on to the table with Evans and the three boys. He stopped to talk to the two boys who had seemed unimpressed earlier, and Remus caught the names Avery and Mulciber.

'I don't need your help with Slughorn,' Sirius whispered in an irritated voice to James, 'I can handle him myself.'

'I know you can,' James whispered back, quickly, 'but this way is more fun.'

'What way? You flirting with Slughorn?'

'A challenge,' James hazel eyes glinted in delight, 'I reckon we can keep him off until the end of the class, don't you?'

Remus had to hand it to James. Sirius' annoyance had evaporated.

Sirius grinned, his grey eyes shining just as keenly: 'oh, we can do so much better than that.'

The two black-haired boys spent the rest of the lesson alternating between brewing their potion and plotting how to escape various attempts by their professor to talk to Sirius. One particularly daring plan seemed to be the favourite, should professor Slughorn ask to speak to Sirius after class, and Remus hoped for his own sake, and that of his classmates, that this plan wouldn't be enacted.

Remus found that Peter and he were sort of effective, sort of sorry, potions partners. They complemented each other well, but Remus realised quickly neither would do well on their own.

Peter seemed to struggle to remember the instructions he had just read, and mixed up various steps. Towards the end of the lesson, Remus had to stop him from adding the porcupine quills before taking the cauldron off the fire. But then, Remus was having his own challenges in class. He had no problem reading and remembering the instructions, but the execution was a whole other matter. His chopping skills were abysmal, he stirred clumsily and he even knocked over his jar of horned slugs when weighing the dried nettle. Never before in his life had Remus been forced to consider himself clumsy, but there was something about working on small benches, pressed between classmates and under time pressure that didn't bring out the best of him.

None of this was made any easier by the looks he was thrown by professor Slughorn, as if the professor had expected no better from a half-breed.

Professor Slughorn passed Remus and Peter's cauldron without comment as he made his final round around the room. This was probably as good a result as they would be able to achieve. It meant there was nothing disastrous to comment on, at least.

'What have we here? Excellent, excellent! Well, m'boy, I should say you will turn out just as good as your father,' Slughorn exclaimed as he looked into the cauldron of Sirius and James.

'That should cure most boils, I would say. Well done indeed! Well then, take 10 points to Gryffindor.'

Remus felt he was beginning to spot a trend. Whether it was because the boys were benefitting from being from pure-blood wizarding families, or because they simply were exceptionally bright, they seemed unbeatable at everything they did.

Slughorn seemed to have thought so too because he was just instructing the class to pack up when he stopped dead in front of the table with the three Slytherins and Lily Evans.

Earlier, Evans and that long-nosed boy had been working quietly away while professor Slughorn had chatted to the two boys, Mulciber and Avery. At the time, the professor had paid the two of them as much attention as he had to Remus and Peter, but now, he looked down at their potion with delight.

'Oho! Now this is... extraordinary! Everybody gather round. Now then, look at the consistency, look at the colour. I couldn't have done it better myself.'

Professor Slughorn spooned out some of the potion and let it fall back into the cauldron for everyone to see.

'Lily Evans and Severus Snape, was it? Yes, I thought so. Very good, very good.'

Professor Slughorn beamed at the pair.

'Evans.. Evans... It's a common enough name... And yet I can't seem to remember having taught anyone with that name before.'

'You wouldn't have taught my family, Sir, they are muggles,' Lily Evans explained. The boy next to her looked extremely uncomfortable.

This news seemed to surprise the two boys that had been sharing their table with Evans and Snape, judging by the fact that they finally showed some interest in the class. While they kept their eyes fixed on Evans and the professor, the two leaned in closer to each other to exchange a few quiet words.

The professor seemed almost as surprised as the two boys: 'Really? Well these things do happen I suppose. And Snape... Now where have I heard that name before?'

'You may remember my mother, Sir, Eileen Prince. She spoke very highly of you,' Severus Snape said quickly.

'Indeed I do remember Miss Prince,' Slughorn said. 'Such a talented girl... A shame really that she decided... Well, in any case, I can see you inherited your mother's talent for potion-making,' Slughorn said kindly, though some of his enthusiasm seemed to have gone out of him.

'Along with all her potions equipment,' James whispered to Sirius, and both boys snorted. As Remus' brass scales were just as shabby-looking and worn-down as Snape's, he found this comment less funny than his classmates.

'Well, what do you two say to another 10 points, each, to Slytherin and Gryffindor?'

Evans beamed at her potions partner, but Snape looked surprisingly unhappy for someone who had just earned his house a whole 10 points.

'Come on,' James said to Sirius, as they had washed their cauldrons and stored their equipment away. 'Lets go before Horace remembers you.'

Remus looked around to see his potions professor look up just in time to see the retreating backs of Sirius Black and James Potter. Their eyes met and the professor smiled, sympathetically, but looked away quickly. The message couldn't have been clearer to Remus, who in any case knew from his father that most wizards and witches would want nothing to do with a werewolf.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Chapter 9 - Part of the team

'Who knew Snivellus could brew a potion?' Sirius said as they made their way up the stairs to the astronomy tower.

'I am surprised he was able to read the instructions with that nose of his,' James smirked.

Something clicked into place for Remus - Snivellus - that was James and Sirius' name for Severus Snape: that was why they had mentioned him to Lily Evans the previous afternoon.

'I bet it was Evans doing the whole thing,' Sirius said, looking unhappy. Then he exclaimed: 'What does she think she's playing at, hanging around with those Slytherin gits when she's muggle-born!?'

'For someone who says they are not concerned about blood status,' James said, cautiously, 'you sure talk a lot about it.'

'It's because they care,' Sirius said firmly. 'You don't get it. I have no idea where your parents have kept you, but people like Snape and Avery and Mulciber - Slytherins in other words - they really really care.'

'I know Slytherin's are foul creatures, that's why I make it a rule not to befriend them,' James said. For some reason, Peter seemed to throw James a wary look.

'And you don't need to tell me that Snivellus is as slimy as they come, but he does seem to like Evans, so what's it to you?' James continued.

'She doesn't know what she's in for, that's all,' Sirius said with grim confidence. 'Trust me. Didn't you see the look on Snivellus' face when she mentioned her muggle parents?'

'Well, she'll learn soon enough,' James said. 'Thank Merlin we don't have any more classes with the Slytherins. Seeing Snivellus three times a week is going to be more than enough for me.'

Professor Stjerna, their Astronomy professor, was a bespectacled man with dark skin and greying hair. He and James spent the first ten minutes of the lesson discussing different models of telescopes before the professor seemed to remember that he had a class to teach. Remus suspected that James had remembered, and had tried to keep his professor from beginning the lesson.

The class was mostly spent preparing them for their first midnight astronomy lesson, which would take place the following Wednesday. To Remus' horror, Professor Stjerna came over to see how Remus was doing at twice the frequency of the others, and Remus guessed he was fascinated by the idea of having a werewolf in class. While that was an improvement on those that would undoubtedly have shunned him (had they been given a chance) it didn't leave Remus feeling much better.

'Don't!' Remus hissed at James and Sirius towards the end of the lesson, when he caught them messing around with Peter's copy of The Celestial Chronicles: A Journey Through the Cosmos by Astrid Starshine. Peter had just made his way up to professor Stjerna who insisted on inspecting everyone's telescope.

It wasn't like Remus to push back - particularly not against the likes of Sirius and James, but he had promised Peter he'd try to help.

'Can't you two just give it a break?' he whispered. 'We're all Gryffindors. We're meant to be on the same team.'

Remus wasn't sure why he had gone with the team analogy. He had never been allowed to play football with the other boys in the villages they had lived in and he knew nothing about what being in a team felt like. Maybe he wanted his own words to be true.

James Potter, ever the Quidditch enthusiast, seemed to take these words to heart, and Remus learned something new. He didn't really have to convince both James and Sirius of anything. If he convinced one, the other would follow.

A discovery richer, and having helped his friend, Peter, Remus felt as cheerful as he was going to feel a day before a transformation.

Lesson over (and Remus feeling considerably more knowledgeable), the four of them headed to lunch.

History of magic had been challenging the day before, but with the lack of sleep the previous evening, and the aches in his body, the pain of this class increased a thousandfold. The only good thing that could be said for the class was that it was followed by two free periods. Remus left the classroom with no more notes or knowledge than he had possessed when he had entered.

When James and Sirius invited the two boys to come flying with them, Remus rejected the offer immediately. Not only did he not know how to fly, he was also looking forward to spending his free periods resting in bed - he hoped he'd be able to nap, but didn't count on it.

Before, Remus had always been able to take it easy in the days leading up to the full moon. It gave him a complete carte blanche with his family, who while not being able to understand what he was going through, at least knew that things became difficult before a transformation, as well as after.

He was pleased, however, to see that Peter accepted the offer. It seemed the boy's confidence was growing around James and Sirius, which was good, considering how often Peter would be left alone with both of them. Remus just prayed that they treated Peter nicely; that they continued to take his team analogy seriously.

Remus didn't get up for tea, and no one came looking for him. It seemed the boys operated on an out-of-sight out-of-mind basis, which was exactly what Remus had hoped for. As much as Remus wanted to be part of a team, this was something he had to face alone.

Day passed into night, and Remus felt himself increasingly nervous for the following evening. Every time a transformation started, Remus would realise how he'd been able to successfully forget how painful they were. This was probably the case this time too, but just knowing that he didn't know how bad it would get was enough to make his stomach twist uncomfortably and his eyes to burn with unshed tears. His body was already in pain. It would get worse. And it would be worse than what he could imagine.

He didn't want this. If there was any way to stop the pain from happening he would take it. But there was no way, and Remus had no choice but to live on the promise of the weeks in-between his transformation when he was allowed to be - almost - normal.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Checkmate,' James said not too quietly. 'I told you I could beat you!'

Sirius glanced over at Peter's bed, hoping James hadn't woken the boy. The last thing he wanted was for their midnight chess games to be disrupted by Peter, either insisting on wanting to play or watching them in awe the way he had on Friday in the common room.

It was Saturday and James and Sirius were alone in their dormitory, if Sirius ignored Peter, which he hoped he'd be able to continue to do for the rest of the night. Remus had gone home to see his mother who was unwell. He had left a note on his bed explaining that he wasn't sure when he would be able to return, but that he hoped he'd be back by Monday evening.

Peter had been particularly devastated by the note: 'this is just like that Prewett sister! Remember what Jorkins told us?! She had to go home all the time to visit Fabian, not knowing if he'd be okay.'

'Well, if it's just like that, his mother will be just fine,' Sirius had said, thinking of the now healthy Quidditch captain, but knowing that this wasn't really what Peter had meant.

James had seemed able to show Peter more patience.

'Do you think there something we should do?' He had asked the small boy.

Sirius didn't like how James had taken to the team analogy Remus had used. Sharing a bedroom with someone didn't mean you were on the same team. Sirius had shared a house with his supposed family all his life; he shared their so-called 'pure' blood and he was decidedly NOT on their team. Anyways, teams were as weak as their weakest link, and Peter was weak.

Peter had shrugged helplessly (because, that was what Peter did): 'I don't know... Maybe... maybe just show him that we care?'

'How?' Sirius had asked unimpressed at Peter's obvious remark. Of course they should show Remus that they cared. Idiot.

'Let's write to him,' James had suggested, resulting in the boys sending Remus a letter earlier that afternoon.

'Keep your voice down, will you?' Sirius hissed to James now. 'And yes, congratulations. That makes it what? Three-one to me?'

James shook his head: 'No, it's one-null to me.'

'Ignoring my previous victories, are we?'

'Different format,' James shrugged.

'The normal format you mean?' Sirius asked.

'Well, yes, because most wizards and witches are boring. Rematch?'

They were sitting on the floor between their two beds, playing wizard chess into the night - the way friends did - because James Potter was Sirius' friend. And that was something to write home about, if Sirius had had anyone to write home to.

James' hand was already hovering over his wand, which he had turned into a sort of stopwatch using a spell he had learned from his father. Of course, James had been inventing new varieties of wizard chess with his family... While James' skills told Sirius that the Potters probably never went easy on their son in the way of competition, the games they played would have been loving ones, because that was the sort of life James Potter had lived.

Why Sirius didn't hate the git was something even he found difficult to explain to himself.

'Alright, but let's play the normal - boring - way and see if I can make it a four-null.'

James looked unhappy, but didn't argue. He'll push back when the novelty of not getting it his way wears off, Sirius thought about his friend. But there was no bitterness in his thoughts.

Though Sirius would never tell James, he didn't want a timer on so that the two could keep talking more freely. This wasn't only because Sirius knew this was James' one big weakness - talking and therefore stopping to pay attention to the game - no, it was because Sirius enjoyed talking to the messy-haired, bespectacled boy.

Sirius threw another look towards Peter's bed, but thankfully, no mousy-haired boy was poking his head out between the red hangings. Good. There was something Sirius needed to discuss with James.

'James, you're pureblood,' Sirius said, tentatively, about fifteen minutes into the game. He wasn't quite sure how to approach this. Sirius knew how to be guarded - he did not know how to let it down. Even Regulus, whom Sirius believed liked him, maybe even looked up to him - a little - was someone Sirius couldn't fully open up to, because Regulus wanted to make his family proud, and that made him dangerous to Sirius.

'Here's with the blood status, again,' James said, but unlike the previous times James had remarked on this, there was a slight smile on James' lips. That had to be a promising sign. James trusted that Sirius wasn't about to say something awful.

'How come you don't seem to know anything about my family?' Sirius asked, quickly. He immediately regretted asking the question. This wasn't a topic he should discuss with anyone. How could he be sure James wasn't going to exploit his vulnerabilities? That's what people did. That's what his family did to him, and if Sirius was honest with himself, that was also what he did to his family. It was how the world operated.

Except, James already seemed to know how cursed Sirius felt by his family name, because he had continued to have Sirius' back unquestioningly throughout the past few days. Without understanding the importance of any of it, James had walked with Sirius to the owlery in the dead of night, and he had made it clear that his loyalty lay with Sirius first.

James' hazel eyes moved from the sorry and uneven fight between a pawn and a bishop to meet Sirius' eyes. He seemed to consider the question, which James rarely did. Merlin, Sirius hated how much he felt that the other boy's answer would matter.

'I dunno,' James said after a pause, seeming unhappy about the unhelpful answer. 'I would say it's a bit conceited of you to think everyone knows your family, but ... they all seem to do, don't they?'

Sirius didn't answer that one. They all did seem to know. Naturally, Walburga Black had raised her sons in the belief that being Black was more or less the same as being royalty, but Sirius had harboured some hope that she had been as mistaken in how known the name Black was as she was about everything else.

James told his bishop not to get too cocky after an easy fight, and looked up at Sirius: 'honestly, you'd think these chess pieces hadn't experienced a game before.'

This earned James some angry remarks from his chess pieces, but he just told them to prove him wrong.

Sighing, James picked up the conversation again: 'look, as you like to point out, my parents are very old. They are not ones for throwing big parties, or having lots of guests over. Dad's also really shy.'

Sirius raised an eyebrow. How on earth James could be related to anyone shy was beyond him.

'He really is,' James insisted, 'he's brilliant - and brave, but he's not one for people.'

Sirius found himself indulging in the same pleasant feeling he had on the train to Hogwarts. James' love and admiration for his father was infectious.

'I wrote to them about you - all of you,' James continued, and Sirius snapped out of his euphoria. Right, here we go, Sirius thought tensely. The Potters would certainly not want James to be friends with a Black, so how long would James continue to defy his parent's wishes? Assuming the Potters knew his family... but yes, they would know.

'Mum just told me to take care of you,' James said, studying Sirius.

'I don't need taking care of!'

Sirius had managed this far on his own, hadn't he? Unlike James and all the other boys, Sirius had been forced to face the world alone - lest he turned out as deranged as the rest of his family.

James didn't respond for a bit. Instead both boys refocused their attention on the chess game. In his frustration, Sirius made a stupid mistake that could cost him the game, and he was just grateful that his chess pieces were intelligent enough to keep quiet about it. Maybe James wouldn't notice.

'Not everything is about what we need, y'know that, don't you?'

'Maybe not for you,' Sirius said simply. He didn't want to get into this any further than they already had. It had been a silly idea, talking to James about this. How could James understand?

'Fair enough,' James shrugged, recognising the dismissal, 'but as I always get what I want, and I want to be your friend, you can't deny me that!'

There was something defiant in the way James looked at Sirius. Defiant and trusting and good.

''Suppose not,' Sirius said, trying to sound offhanded. 'Just don't go all soft on me, Potter.'

'Well, I don't think you need to worry,' James said, a hand gesticulating towards the chessboard and the crushing victory it seemed James was in for.

One stupid mistake and Sirius was looking at his first real loss against James Potter. Orion Black would have been furious with Sirius for making a careless mistake - for letting emotions interfere with his play.

Chess had been the only way Sirius had known to earn some slight... not exactly respect, but positive attention from his father. Sirius was brighter than Regulus, even when accounting for their one-and-a-half-year age gap. But Sirius wasn't foolish enough to believe that the challenges he could throw his father's way in form of a good chess game would make up for his utter betrayal by being sorted into Gryffindor. And that was a good thing, Sirius reminded himself, it made things easier. Previously, Sirius had sometimes been conflicted between the need to stand up against his family and the slight thrill of seeing approval in Orion's eyes when Sirius played a particularly good game. Now he didn't have to worry.

His mother, of course, had been a lost cause for years. When he was younger, Sirius knew he could get lost in London because his parents were magic and would inevitably find him. He had enjoyed sneaking out of the house and luring his parents into ever more public spaces in the heart of the capital, knowing how much his family detested muggles. This had provided Sirius with a source of entertainment and payback against his parents, until one day, age nine, his mother didn't come for him.

Sirius, though increasingly familiar with the city, had been thoroughly lost and was forced to walk the streets until a muggle cab driver picked him up in the middle of the night, taking pity on him. Though he would never admit it, the terror of walking around alone, directionless, had been greater even than the punishment that awaited him at home.

'Another game?' Sirius asked James as he saw no way of being able to come back from this one.

'Isn't it getting a bit too late?' his friend asked, grinning.

'Yeah, you're right,' Sirius agreed, not entirely understanding why it was so easy to understand James.

'So one more game?' James asked, predictably.

'One more game,' Sirius agreed.

'If we use a timer we might be able to do two more games,' James offered innocently.

'Nice try,' Sirius said, and threw his spare pillow at James.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'You're back early,' Sirius observed as they lined up outside the greenhouses for their very first lesson in Herbology on Monday morning, which they would have together with the Hufflepuffs.

Remus Lupin, unusually pale-looking, had showed up unexpectedly in the line of queuing students, having returned from his visit to his mother earlier than expected.

'Mum wasn't as poorly as initially feared, so she wanted me back at school before lessons started,' Remus explained. He sounded tired, but he looked happy enough. Sirius assumed that this must mean his mother wasn't about to die just yet.

'It's good to have you back,' James smiled.

'We missed you,' Peter piped up.

Speak for yourself, Sirius thought. Remus was fun, and he seemed like a kind boy who didn't deserve what he was going through, but the only thing Sirius had missed about the thin boy with the light brown hair and green eyes was his role as Peter's friend, so that Peter didn't bother him and James.

'Thanks for the letter... that - that meant a lot,' Remus said, and Sirius was surprised at the sincerity in Remus' voice.

'Well, as Pete said, we missed you,' James said, and Sirius supposed that there was some truth in that, after all.

A murmur started as a small boy with brown curls that fell almost to his shoulders made his way to the greenhouse.

'That's Davey Gudgeon,' Sirius heard Peter whisper to Remus. 'You won't have heard, but he got beaten up real badly by the Whomping Willow - he nearly lost an eye!'

'That's what they say at least,' James added, eyeing Gudgeon with a mix of curiosity and annoyance, 'and it's because of this git we're all now forbidden to go near the tree.'

'I didn't think you had planned to go near it again anyways,' Remus said, frowning.

'No, but now that we can't...' James shrugged, looking at Sirius for support.

Sirius was happy to oblige: 'Yeah, if the teachers didn't want us to go near it, they shouldn't have forbidden it.'

Remus and Peter looked unconvinced. This is why Sirius preferred James. He, like Sirius, always seemed to be on a lookout for a challenge.

'Come,' James said to Sirius as a squat little witch, who wore a patched hat over her flyaway hair and had a large amount of earth on her clothes, opened the door to the greenhouse, 'I want to speak to Gudgeon about yesterday.'

'Hi,' James said to Davey Gudgeon as they all filed inside. 'I am James Potter and this is -'

'Sirius Black,' the boy next to Gudgeon finished for him. 'Yeah, we know who you are.'

James seemed pleased at being recognised, Sirius couldn't quite share his friend's enthusiasm.

'This is Simon Stebbins,' Davey Gudgeon said introducing the boy next to him, 'and I am -'

'Davey Gudgeon - we know who you are too,' James grinned.

Davey Gudgeon seemed to share Sirius' feelings about being recognised. He looked down and his cheeks had gone slightly red.

'So is it true?' James asked eagerly, 'about the Whomping Willow? Did it really beat you up?'

'I suppose so,' Gudgeon shrugged.

'What happened?' James asked curiously.

'To be honest, I don't remember much... I remember going down to the tree with Simon, but then it all gets blurry.'

'So you were there?' James asked Stebbins, clearly unwilling to give up on learning more about what happened.

'Yeah, I was,' Stebbins confirmed.

'So... what do you remember? The tree didn't beat you up now, did it?' James pushed, impatiently, and rightly so, as it seemed the class was about to begin.

'No...' the boy agreed, sounding doubtful. 'I remember that it got Davey in the face, and there was blood...'

But that seemed to be about it, because Simon never finished the sentence. Before James could continue to push for more intelligence, professor Sprout called out to the class: 'gather round, everybody.'

'Typical...' James muttered to Sirius. 'Totally useless Hufflepuffs.'

Sirius agreed. Talking to Gudgeon and Stebbins had been a complete waste of time.

Luckily Sirius had something to look forward to after the Herbology class:

'Defence Against the Dark Arts next,' Sirius said, monitoring James' face carefully (not that James' face needed diligent studying, his friend was like an open book), 'it'll be nice to see Madame Maxwell again...'

The Gryffindors were making their way back to the castle and Sirius let the sentence hang for just the right amount of time before he continued: 'what do you think James: d'you reckon you can manage to say more than two words put together without making a fool of yourself?'

James didn't answer, but a slight pinkish tint had spread across his cheeks. Oh, this was too good.

'I think your only hope is to stay quiet,' Remus suggested with a small smile. 'But then again, -'

'When have you ever been able to stay quiet,' Sirius agreed, earning him a scowl from his bespectacled friend.

To Sirius' slight disappointment, James had few opportunities to embarrass himself in front of Madame Maxwell during the class, which thus passed with little incident. It was a good thing Madame Maxwell was as interesting as she was, otherwise Sirius would have been bored to death.

Sirius didn't understand why teachers would repeat the information that was included in the text books - they could read couldn't they? He had hoped his classes would have been more about applying the knowledge, which to be fair could be said of Herbology and Potions (Potions just had the disadvantage of Slughorn), but not the other classes. In Transfiguration they had at least started doing some actual magic, but judging by his classmates, he and James would be transfiguring piles of matches into needles before anyone else made any progress.

They hadn't been taught any magic yet in Defence Against the Dark Arts, which Sirius had immediately found disappointing, as it was the class he - and James - had most looked forward to. But then Madame Maxwell had started sharing some stories from her life as an Auror - proving herself to be a far more interesting and knowledgeable person than their other professors, who all seemed to lack practical experience. Even professor McGonagall, whom Sirius knew was a talented witch, had not done anything interesting with her life as far as Sirius could tell, and he was sure she was a sorry dueller.

Once the class was finished, Madame Maxwell called to James, asking him to stay behind for a moment. James' hazel eyes widened and he fell off his chair in his eagerness to get up. Sirius felt he deserved a medal for his efforts to stop himself bursting into laughter. He had to turn around and wipe his eyes.

Well, he'd be damned if he missed out on the action so he bent down, pretending to tie his shoe laces.

'Monsieur Pottair, 'ow are you feeling? Ze injury, it iz 'ealed?'

'Y-yes, professor,' James stammered. Oh, what Sirius would give to see his friend's face.

'Wat 'appened?'

'Nothing,' James said and Sirius could hear the mortification in his voice.

Sirius knew how embarrassing the cover story they had come up with would seem to James just then. James wasn't about to admit to 'slipping and falling down the stairs'.

'But of course! You yong boys need your secrets,' Madame Maxwell said, and Sirius, glancing up, saw a warmth in the professor's moss-coloured eyes as she looked down at James.

'It was somezing 'eroic, non?'

Sirius imagined that James must have nodded (he wasn't about to turn down this opportunity to impress Madame Maxwell), but Sirius was once more pretending to be focused on his made-up task. James didn't make any verbal reply in any case.

'Bon! Well, I weel see you tomorrow. Au revoir, mon petit.'

James spotted Sirius as he made his way out and Sirius got the impression James was trying to look angry with him, but flushed with the success from his conversation with Madame Maxwell, the effect was not quite what James might have hoped.

James continued to provide some entertainment in Transfiguration. As McGonagall summoned their essays, she quickly learned that James had not completed his.

'Five points from Gryffindor. Care to explain yourself, Potter?' she asked.

'I forgot, professor,' James said, innocently, but Sirius knew this was unlikely. 'But I read the chapter and I don't mind summarising it now, if you let me.'

Professor McGonagall seemed to consider this for a second, then said: 'Very well. Stand up so the class can hear you.'

James stood up and looking like he enjoyed every moment, he went on to summarise the chapter so effectively that Sirius was convinced James had written a summary and was reciting it by heart. Sirius felt this was going a bit far to show off, even for James. But then again, it did break up the monotony of the day.

'Very good, Potter. Five more points from Gryffindor,' professor McGonagall said when he had finished.

'But professor!?' James exclaimed in surprise.

'Be grateful it's not fifteen, Potter. When I ask you to do your homework, I expect you to do it. You, Potter, have just proven you are perfectly able to do it, which means you've just chosen not to. Such behaviour is not tolerated in my class. Do I make myself clear?'

'Yes, professor,' James said, looking moderately serious.

'You can hand in your summary on Wednesday morning, together with today's homework.'

Sirius noticed that that red-head, Lily Evans, seemed particularly pleased about this outcome. She had to be one of those fairness-obsessed people that Sirius could not fathom. Life wasn't fair, and people like her did better to accept this sooner rather than later. But then again, Sirius thought with a slight pang of guilt, she would learn that quickly enough, being muggle-born.

While James' attempt at impressing the class - or possibly the professor - had to be judged a mixed success or an utter failure (depending on his objective), James transfiguration skills quickly seemed to redeem him somewhat in professor McGonagall's eyes. Having completed transfiguring his second needle within the end of this single lesson (the former transfiguration class having been a double one) professor McGonagall did give him back five of the ten points he had lost.

Sirius hadn't done too badly himself. His match from the previous class was almost a perfect needle, which was leaps ahead of his classmates. But rather than excite him, this worried Sirius. What on earth were James and he going to be doing while the other students made their sluglike progress transfiguring something as small and uninteresting as a match? Was it too early to ask James if they should skive off their next transfiguration lesson? Possibly, if Gryffindor were to avoid losing another fifty points from James not turning in his homework for a second time this week.

Sirius felt downcast as he walked to lunch with an excited James, a despairing Peter (he wasn't the only one, Sirius noticed leaving the classroom - transfiguration seemed to produce that effect on most of his classmates) and a distant Remus.

But at lunch, he and his fellow Gryffindors got something else to talk about. Midway through the meal, an excited-looking Maeve Ryan and a nervous-looking Mary Macdonald took the seats next to them.

'We've just been to the common room," Maeve said, eagerly. 'There's a new notice posted since this mornin': Flying lessons are startin' on Thursday.'

James looked as if he had just been told Christmas had arrived early - and Sirius too felt excited. Until they had completed their flying lessons they weren't technically allowed to fly around on the school grounds. Not that this so far had stopped him or James, but this would simplify things.

'Great!' Sirius said, at the same time noticing how this news hadn't necessarily produced happy faces all around. Peter looked excited enough, but Remus looked nervous and Mary looked directly scared.

'She's not told you the bad bit yet,' Mary said.

'What's that?' Peter asked, suddenly looking anxious. There wasn't a lot needed to topple that boy's confidence, that was for sure.

'We're with the Slytherins,' Mary said with feeling.

'That's good news,' Sirius said, not understanding why this would be such a terrible thing.

This gave them another chance to demonstrate to those slimy Slytherins how superior Gryffindors were. James might talk a lot about his skills on a broom, but having seen it first hand, Sirius had to give it to James: he was as good as he believed he was. Sirius was planning to encourage James to show off in every way possible in front of the Slytherins - not that he suspected encouragement was needed.

'No, that's excellent news,' James corrected, and meeting Sirius' eyes he said gleefully: 'want to bet whether Snivillus has ever been on a broom?'

Sirius thought about the worn down potions equipment and second-hand robes, the jerky way the git moved and the air he gave of having come from an even less loving home than himself. The odds of Snape having been on a broom were slim to none.

Sirius grinned at James. His friend was right - this was well and truly excellent news.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had gone to the Hospital Wing around lunchtime on Saturday, feeling too unwell to continue to pretend everything was fine. He consoled himself with the fact that leaving mid-day would be consistent with his story of going home to visit his mother.

Madam Pomfrey gave Remus a sleeping draft ('better get some sleep in now, Lupin, before this evening.') and Remus was, for the first time in his life, allowed a break from his aching body so close to the full moon.

'Just come and see me in the days leading to the transformation and we can see what we can do about managing your symptoms,' Madam Pomfrey said later with the sort of brisk efficiency that held more promise to Remus than any number of kind words, after he finally shared his struggles leading up to this evening. 'Alright, put this cloak on, and then follow me.'

The afternoon had passed in blissful sleep and it was time to leave the comforts of the Hospital Wing. Remus knew the plan - he knew about the empty house Dumbledore had had built in Hogsmeade, about how it was only accessible via the secret tunnel that was in turn guarded by the vicious Whomping Willow. To Remus, the idea that this house, this tunnel, this tree, would permit him to hide his true identity - his monstrous self - from the other students and villagers still seemed farfetched, but Remus also knew that Albus Dumbledore was the greatest wizard alive. He had to trust him.

Hidden from view (courtesy of the invisibility cloak Madam Pomfrey had lent him) Remus followed the matron out the castle. If anyone asked what she was doing, Madam Pomfrey replied that she was going to deliver something to the gamekeeper Hagrid, and Remus managed without too much difficulty to stay out of the way of passing students.

There were still students watching the Whomping Willow, and for a moment, it felt like Remus' heart stopped as he saw no way they would get past all those onlookers. However, he had not taken into account how fierce the matron could be, yelling at the students about their reckless behaviour, and promising no aid should they be injured. Soon all the students had hurried far away.

Once they were sure they were alone, Madam Pomfrey used a long stick to hit a button under the Whomping Willow and the tree froze long enough for the two of them to sneak into the tunnel. It was all so strange, and yet Remus knew that this would become routine and as familiar to him as the dormitory he slept in. There was no cure for lycanthropy and no matter what Remus did or where Remus went, he would always need to transform. In the coming years, this journey to and from the empty house was going to be part of his beastly ritual. The newness, however temporary, nevertheless helped take his mind off the upcoming transformation.

These were always going to be the most difficult years of his life. The few adults he knew talked about their teenage years with a mix of nostalgia and horror, but to Remus the real terror lay in the discrepancy between the adult wolf and his childlike human body.

His transformations had never been easy but they had become worse as the wolf grew, just as the growing wolf had created more and more challenges for Lyall Lupin in his desperate attempt to keep Remus' condition hidden from the world. Remus' body would not only change from human to wolf, but from child to adult, and for some reason this took a greater toll on his body than it did when the wolf had been young. He had been told that when he became an adult, like the wolf, the transformation would not be as torturous, though nobody seemed to suggest they would ever stop being awful. And then, of course, there was the damage he would inflict on himself as the wolf. Isolated from other humans to bite, the wolf clawed and bit the only living being it did have access to.

Madam Pomfrey showed Remus the rooms in the empty house, and left him in the bedroom, advising him to lay down and rest until the transformation took its course. Remus knew the matron had to leave, knew that no human could be near him, but that didn't stop him from feeling abandoned and - which he truly was - alone.

Whether the wolf too was entertained by the newness of the house, or whether it was the freedom that a whole house offered, Remus found himself remarkably unhurt the following morning. After a quick look over by Madam Pomfrey including some application of dittany on the few deeper cuts she could find, Remus was able to walk back to the Hospital Wing. He was aware the wolf had left the house in a considerably worse state than before the transformation, but every scratch mark he saw on the walls and furniture just provided a sense of relief that it wasn't his own skin that had suffered.

Remus was exhausted, but pleased, when he was safely back in bed in the Hospital Wing. The day after a transformation was simultaneously the worst and best day of the month. He might be beaten-up, sore, exhausted, incoherent and in every way unwell, but from that moment onwards, Remus knew that things would continue to improve, until around the half-moon leading up to the following full moon.

'He'll be alright, won't he?'

Remus stiffened. The voice was unfamiliar but it had to belong to a boy that was about Remus' age. Opening his eyes, Remus realised he was well-hidden behind some privacy screens.

'He will be just fine once I am done with him, but you have both been very foolish, going so near that tree.'

That was Madam Pomfrey speaking.

Remus blinked a couple of times, as if it would help clear his head. Someone was in the Hospital Wing and had recently, if Remus guessed correctly, been near the Whomping Willow (or another violent tree, if another such existed) and was now needing the matron's help.

Why nobody could leave the damn tree alone was beyond Remus' understanding.

Then, Remus started worrying it was either James or Sirius again. It sounded like whoever it was who had taken a beating this time was unconscious, otherwise the boy would have asked the other directly. But no, James and Sirius had said they weren't ever planning to go near it again.

'I'll go and fetch Professor Sprout,' an older, female voice said. 'I think she ought to know what has happened.'

'I agree, thank you Miss Bones,' Madam Pomfrey answered.

Professor Sprout was head of Hufflepuff so that confirmed that it was neither Sirius nor James - nor anyone else Remus knew. He let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding.

'Now, I want you to tell me what happened,' Madam Pomfrey said, and Remus suspected she was talking to the young boy who had asked about his friend.

The boy explained how the two had been trying to get near the trunk: 'it's a game, see?' the boy said, sounding like he was eager for Madam Pomfrey to understand, 'lots of people have tried to touch the trunk - it wasn't just us. And everyone has been fine. We would have been fine too, but then Davey saw the tunnel.'

It felt like someone had taken out all the air out of Remus' lungs. The no longer secret tunnel. This was bad.

'The tunnel?' Madam Pomfrey asked, and Remus was impressed at how steady her voice sounded, like she was just gathering facts.

'Yeah, he told me there was a tunnel, and that I had to see - and that's when - when...'

When the branch had hit the boy straight in the face, as Madam Pomfrey was able to extract only after calming the boy, whom Remus learned was called Stebbins. But Remus couldn't have cared less about how the boy was injured at that point, all he could think about was that the tunnel had been discovered.

'So,' Madam Pomfrey said, 'Gudgeon here saw a tunnel. Are you sure it wasn't just an odd shadow?'

'I saw it too, I saw where Davey pointed before -.., and there it was! A tunnel!'

'Sometimes I find a good memory unforgivable,' said a calm voice that Remus recognised as Albus Dumbledore.

'Headmaster!' Madam Pomfrey squealed, 'I didn't -'

'I was lucky enough to run into young Amelia Bones and she explained what had happened. Now Stebbins, tell me, did you mention the tunnel to Miss Bones?'

'N-no, professor Dumbledore,' the boy answered, and Remus could hear the tremor in his voice as he was addressing their headmaster.

'And had you ever heard talk of such a tunnel before?'

'No, professor Dumbledore,' the boy repeated.

Professor Dumbledore muttered something, and Remus had a suspicion the headmaster was using magic as the air in the Hospital Wing seemed to shift ever so slightly.

'Really, Headmaster, memory spells can be very dangerous...'

'My dearest Poppy, I am well aware of that fact, but it was no trouble removing such a small part of young Stebbins' memory. Now, I trust you to do an equally good job of removing Gudgeon's memory should it be necessary, but we can hope that his head injury prevents him from remembering the tunnel at all.'

'I shall not hope for any such thing,' Madam Pomfrey said hotly, then she sighed, 'but I will remove his memory should it be necessary. However, this tree is becoming a problem - I had my hands full getting everyone away from it last night, and we cannot continue to wipe the students memories ever other day.'

'Ah, that's right... How is young Lupin? Did everything go to plan?'

'He's fine. He's sleeping at the moment.'

At those words Remus closed his eyes, even though he knew they couldn't see him.

Madam Pomfrey continued: 'Everything went exactly according to what you had said, except - I repeat - the students swarming around that tree like bowtruckles on doxy eggs.'

There was a silence, before Madam Pomfrey spoke again: 'Can't you ban students from going near it? Use the boy's injury as an excuse, if you must. It's a lucky thing he didn't lose an eye, or was killed for that matter.'

'I can certainly do that Poppy, and I think perhaps it is the wisest path open to us, however, bans may sometimes have the opposite effect.'

'That's a risk I suggest we take.'

Remus wholeheartedly agreed with the matron.

Professor Dumbledore didn't seem to argue, instead he said: 'Young Stebbins will wake up soon. He might not even realise he's been unconscious, and I believe it best if you don't correct him on that account. I will see to the ban. Let me know if there are any developments I should be aware of with regards to young Gudgeon. Or better still, Pomona should be here soon enough. I am sure she will inform me should it be necessary.'

'It shouldn't. The boy's head injury is not consequential.'

'Well, that is good news indeed.'

Although professor Dumbledore didn't say anything further on the matter, Remus guessed he must have looked on the verge of speaking, because Madam Pomfrey asked: 'Headmaster?'

'It may be wise to encourage Pomona to take a few points of the two boys - just as a precaution. I appreciate that there was no rule in place at the time of the incident, but if we are to prevent students going near the Whomping Willow we may as well do the job properly. Ah, I see young Stebbins is stirring - that will be my cue to leave.'

'You have a letter,' Madam Pomfrey said as she came to check on Remus a few hours later. She handed him an envelope and took his food away. Remus recognised his mother's handwriting. After everything he had been through in the last few days, the usual but unbearable pain of the transformation, the guilt at the inconvenience he was creating for everyone, he felt a powerful surge of longing for home, and especially his mother.

Remus was surprised to find another letter enclosed with that of his mother, but his curiosity did not outweigh how much he missed Hope, and Remus began reading the letter from his mum.

My dearest Remus,

Your father and I have just received a letter from Madam Pomfrey giving us an update on your health as of Saturday noon. It is now but Saturday evening and I know you will be getting ready for the transformation. I can't pretend it does not pain me not to be with you, my darling son, but your father and I know that you are well-looked after, and that you possess a rare and admirable strength. By the time this letter reaches you, you will once more have endured another transformation, and I cannot begin to tell you how proud we are of you.

How transforming into a monster was anything to be proud of, Remus didn't know, but he had never been able to get his parents to stop saying that.

If it should prove too much, being in school, you must let us know my love. There is no shame in trying and realising something does not work. And should you need your father to come and visit before or after a transformation, you must not be afraid to ask. He misses you dearly (as do I), and we want to do everything we can to support you.

On the topic of support, I have enclosed a letter that arrived here, which is from your class-mates. Oh Remus dear, I can't believe you have already gotten such lovely and caring friends. As much as we miss you, nothing would please us more than knowing you are with boys your own age for once, and forming experiences that will last you a life-time.

We love you to the new moon and back,
Mum xx

Remus held onto the letter for some time, re-reading it and tracing the letters his mother had written. It was like receiving a loving hug, and yet it left something to be desired: his mother's warmth, her smell, the fabric of her clothes. He hadn't realised he was crying until a tear fell on the paper, and Remus quickly wiped it off, hoping it didn't blotch a single letter.

"If it should prove too much ... let us know," his mother had offered. Maybe it was too much. Not the transformations, but the risks associated with staying in school.

The boy that had been beaten by the Whomping Willow had luckily woken up not long after Dumbledore left. Professor Sprout had considered him sufficiently well to spend a good fifteen minutes lecturing him and his friend about the danger of what they had been doing and Madam Pomfrey had removed any memory Gudgeon had of the incident ('to be on the safe side,' she explained to Remus who had confessed to hearing the conversation with Dumbledore, being unable to hide how nervous he was about the discovery of the tunnel). Yet, if this discovery had happened so soon after his arrival, it was just a matter of time before someone made the same discovery again.

For something to do, Remus turned to his other letter, he found a shortly scribbled note:

Remus,

We were sorry to hear about your mother. Hopefully she will recover soon and we will see you back at Hogwarts.

Next time (Peter says there might be - but we all hope there won't), say goodbye before you leave (don't just leave us a note).

Let us know if there's anything we can do.

James, Peter and Sirius.

It wasn't much, but the hurriedly scribbled letter meant the world to Remus. "As much as we miss you, nothing would please us more than knowing you are with boys your own age for once, and forming experiences that will last you a life-time." Maybe it wasn't time to write to ask to come home just yet. Maybe sneaking around, lying, hiding, could be worth it. Because Hogwarts offered something his parents never could: it offered a world in which he was just another boy, another boy with friends and classmates and homework and everything that had seemed impossible a few months earlier.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had, somehow, managed to convince Madam Pomfrey to let him leave the Hospital Wing on Monday morning. Never in his dreams had he imagined being able to recover so quickly, but the combination of it being a good month and the care of Madam Pomfrey had meant that he was just about well enough to return to his classes.

Madam Pomfrey threw Davey Gudgeon out without ceremony on Monday morning before breakfast, declaring him recovered, and not wanting him to hang around when Remus made his way to his first class, following a quick breakfast in bed.

The crisp autumn air that greeted Remus was invigorating as he made his way to the greenhouses. He might be doing better than expected, but he was still tired, still sore and had he not been in school, he would probably have spent the day in bed.

Seeing his fellow Gryffindors was as welcome as the fresh breeze: upon seeing him, Peter instantly brightened, James smiled enthusiastically and even Sirius seemed mildly interested, observing that Remus was back sooner than expected. Thinking of their letter, Remus had to fight an overwhelming (and from these boys perspective, entirely unjust) sense of affection towards them. Suddenly it seemed clear to Remus why he had found both the strength and motivation to leave the Hospital Wing so soon: he had places to be and friends to be with.

Though the bliss did not last long. Everyone that had gathered around Greenhouse One suddenly started to whisper amongst themselves, looking towards a boy about Peter's height with curly brown hair.

'That's Davey Gudgeon,' Peter whispered, no doubt noticing Remus' confusion. 'You won't have heard, but he got beaten up real badly by the Whomping Willow - he nearly lost an eye!'

Remus couldn't help but stare: he had known the boy was a Hufflepuff, and he had suspected they were not far apart in age, but it hadn't occurred to him that they were in the same year, and that they therefore would be having Herbology together. He pictured the boy unconscious, lying in an identical bed to the one he had been in, with professor Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey plotting to erase his memory. Had it worked?

'That's what they say at least... and it's because of this git we're all now forbidden to go near the tree,' James complained, drawing Remus back to the present moment.

'I didn't think you had planned to go near it again anyways,' Remus said, feeling uneasy at the way James was eyeing Gudgeon - with undisguised curiosity.

'No, but now that we can't...' James shrugged, looking at Sirius.

'Yeah,' Sirius picked up, 'if the teachers didn't want us to go near it, they shouldn't have forbidden it.'

Professor Dumbledore had been right then, for some people - people like James and Sirius - a ban seemed to increase the appeal of the Whomping Willow. Peter was decidedly not someone like that, he looked thoroughly taken aback by James and Sirius' renewed interest.

Just then, what had to be Professor Sprout appeared, glancing quickly at Davey Gudgeon and the boy next to him, before she walked to the front and invited the students into the greenhouse.

'Come, I want to speak to Gudgeon about yesterday,' Remus heard James say to Sirius, and a second later, the two boys had left Peter and Remus.

Well, Remus comforted himself, this way - at least - I will soon know whether Madam Pomfrey's memory charm was successful.

Either Gudgeon's blow to the head had erased his memory - or Madam Pomfrey had indeed succeeded with her memory charm - because James and Sirius had not learned anything at all about what had happened to Gudgeon, and certainly nothing about a tunnel.

The rest of the morning was spent in Defence Against the Dark Arts (something that gave Sirius an opening to tease James about Madam Maxwell) and Transfiguration. Remus made zero inroads on his match in the latter, despite his practice in the common room a few days earlier. Though, he suspected he would have fared better had he not started to feel so drained. The little energy he had possessed seemed to have escaped him, and he was relieved to hear the bell announcing the end of the lesson.

At lunch, however, he got something else to worry about. Flying lessons were about to start on Thursday afternoon, if Mary Macdonald and Maeve Ryan were to be believed (and he had no reason to doubt either). This news seemed to please the other boys in his dormitory, and James and Sirius seemed particularly excited when they learned that the Slytherins would be having the lessons with them.

It was obvious that James and Sirius thought themselves unusually skilled on a broom, as they seemed confident they would absolutely outperform their rival house. They seemed especially delighted at the idea of showing off what they considered their superior skills in comparison to Snape. Remus wondered whether it had irked James and Sirius that Snape had outdone them in potions.

'I don't bloody care whether - wait, who did you say hadn't been on a broom?' Macdonald asked.

'Snape,' James said.

'Slimy git, sat with your friend in potions,' Sirius added.

'In any case,' Macdonald said, 'I've not been on a broom before either, Lily has never been on a broom before -'

'I've never been on a broom before,' Remus added quietly. This earned Remus a more sympathetic look from James than a sick (or in Peter's case, dead) parent had.

'Lupin has never been on a broom before,' Macdonald repeated, 'we're all going to look like right idiots out there.'

'That's a point,' Sirius said, frowning, 'with old Salazar Slytherin's pureblood obsession, I doubt there'll be many who have not been on a broom in that house.'

'Who's Salazar Slytherin?' Macdonald asked.

'The founder of Slytherin,' Ryan said with disgust, 'Had some bloody twisted ideas, that one did. Got himself rightly kicked out by the other founders in the end.'

So, Remus reflected, the dislike of Slytherins dated back from the earliest days of Hogwarts. Those were deep wounds indeed, but that didn't mean it was necessarily fair.

James chewed his lip, seeming to consider this problem far more seriously than any question he had been asked by a professor: 'I can show you how to fly, if you want?'

'What makes you qualified for that?' Macdonald asked, sceptically.

'He's damn good,' Sirius said, looking at his friend with admiration.

'I was taught by the best,' James said proudly.

'Your dad, I presume,' Sirius said, smirking ever so slightly.

'Nah, dad's a terrible flyer!'

'Your mother then?' Peter asked.

'She's decent,' James conceded. 'But no, not her.'

James looked like he was about to drop something really exciting, his face was filled with anticipation and his eyes were ablaze.

'Oh spit it out already, Potter,' Macdonald said, impatiently.

'Sarah Shafiq,' James said, 'she taught me how to fly.'

'No bleedin' way!' Ryan exclaimed, her eyes wide in disbelief.

'You know her?' Peter asked, similarly taken aback.

'She's my cousin,' James said, grinning widely at everyone's reaction.

While Sirius hadn't said anything, it was clear this was news to him too. But whereas Peter and Maeve Ryan looked on the verge of being outright jealous, Sirius just seemed interested.

'Who is this Sarah Shafiq?' Macdonald asked, studying everyone's faces.

'She's only the keeper of the English Quidditch team,' Maeve Ryan said.

'And the captain of the Holyhead Harpies,' Peter added.

'And for an English lass, she's not half bad, ye know.'

This last comment was from Ryan, before something shifted in her expression: all amazement and jealousy gone in an instant. When she next addressed James, her tone was softer: 'Tha' means Alexandra Shafiq was your cousin too.'

James nodded.

'She seemed great,' Peter said, in a sombre tone.

'The best chaser England would ever get,' James agreed.

Seeing the uncertain face of Macdonald (and no doubt seeing Remus' own confusion) James added: 'Alex was Sarah's sister. She was... bloody fantastic - best chaser in the world, I reckon. She was signed up to play for England by the end of her seventh year.'

'And she already had a contract with Puddlemere United by the end of her sixth year,' Peter said in awe, 'she was brilliant.'

'Aye, it's true,' Ryan said, 'she was bleedin' amazing.'

'She got her contract with England at the same time as her sister, right? A year after England hosted the World Cup?' Peter asked.

'Yes,' Sirius said, 'and Sarah was what... three years older?'

'Four,' James corrected.

'So what happened?' Remus asked, tentatively.

'Well, she... she died,' Peter said. Remus had guessed that much.

'In the middle of the 1966 World Cup,' Sirius added.

'It wasn't even a game; it was just a stupid practice,' James said, and for all the lightness his tone tried to carry, he wasn't able to hide a tinge of bitterness.

'I am so sorry, Potter,' Macdonald's dark eyes were filled with sympathy.

'Don't be,' James said, smiling (albeit somewhat strained). 'It's along time ago. The family misses her, but I barely remember any of it - any of her... I do remember flying with them both though. Alex was brutal, but great.'

'And her sister continued playing?' Remus asked. Why did wizards seem attracted to danger?

'Not that season, o' course,' Ryan said, 'I'll say this but once, England had a real shot at the cup that year with the two of them.'

'And her - your - family is okay with Sarah Shafiq still playing Quidditch?' Remus asked James, wanting also to ask why James seemed so keen to play Quidditch when it had killed one of his closer relations.

''Course they are,' Sirius answered, 'mate, no one dies in Quidditch. It was rotten luck, that was all.'

Alexandra Shafiq had died though, Remus thought, but felt it insensitive to push the point.

'And you are tryin' for chaser, yeah?' Ryan asked.

'Best position there is,' James said, 'and -' he hesitated, 'it'd be grand if... one day... I could continue Alex' legacy.'

Nobody spoke for a bit.

Remus tried to digest the various pieces of news that he had learned. He found it both easier and harder to understand James' obsession with the wizarding sport. But once more, he had to admit he had underestimated his friends. At six, James had lost his cousin, and judging by the other Gryffindors' intimate knowledge of the whole affair, his family had been unable to grieve privately. True, he seemed no worse for wear now, but there was no reason to believe James had found it easy at the time.

'So...' Sirius said eventually, looking at Macdonald and Remus, 'are you guys keen?'

'Keen for what?' Macdonald asked.

'To have James help you, before the flying lessons on Thursday,' Sirius said, as if this was obvious.

Remus had forgotten this was what had started the conversation. They would all have to fly on these death machines.

'After what we've been talking about, I think it's safest if we wait until we have a teacher to supervise,' Macdonald said fairly.

'Flying isn't dangerous,' James said. 'It's not like we're going to be sending Bludgers your way.'

Remus wondered if Macdonald knew what a Bludger was. Remus wasn't sure, though he knew Peter had told him something about Bludgers.

'But if you want to look like fools on Thursday...' Sirius said, shrugging.

'Fine,' Macdonald conceded, 'if you're keen Lupin?'

Remus wasn't remotely "keen". But he was even less interested in trying to fly for the first time in front of so many students, regardless of their house.

'Sure,' Remus agreed, trying to sound grateful for the offer: 'but not today.'

'Great! Tomorrow then,' James said brightly.

'Do you think Evans wants to join?' Sirius asked.

'This isn't strictly speaking allowed, is it?' Macdonald asked, a small smile tracing her lips.

'Not exactly,' James agreed.

'Then no.'

In the end, James and Sirius were unable to give Remus and Mary Macdonald private flying lessons on Tuesday on account of both of them serving a detention that evening. Professor McGonagall had caught them flying on Monday - or more specifically, she had caught them breaking into the broomshed to get the brooms they needed.

Remus wasn't sure whether he was pleased or disappointed when he learned that this had not discouraged them from wanting to teach him and Macdonald how to fly, nor did it seem to perturb Mary Macdonald in the slightest.

'You're both free tomorrow, aren't you?' James asked when he told them why they couldn't go ahead with the plan that day.

'Sure,' Macdonald said, then she grimaced slightly: 'Just means I need to do that charms homework today rather than tomorrow.'

'It'll take you about five minutes,' Sirius said, 'alright, we better not keep Filch waiting, I suppose...'

'Oh come off if,' Macdonald said as she noticed Remus' unease after the boys had left. 'We now know the worst that can happen if we get caught - one evening of scrubbing some dusty old silver in the trophy room. I don't know about you, but I grew up with chores that required far more.'

Remus doubted very much whether the silver in the trophy room would ever have the chance to get dusty while Sirius and James were in school, but he felt it wasn't a point worth making.

By Wednesday, Remus felt more or less like a normal human being again, which was good, because as the time they would be flying approached, he felt his nerves get the better of him. He wasn't exactly afraid of heights, but usually he had had solid ground or a branch or something sturdy beneath his feet. This would be something different entirely.

He was provided with some distraction in Potions, their last lesson that day, as professor Slughorn finally made the mistake of asking if Sirius could stay behind after class. Sirius and James seemed pleased at being able to put into action the plan they had been preparing for such an eventuality.

Lily Evans and Severus Snape no longer shared a table with Avery and Mulciber. Instead, they now sat with Mary Macdonald and Maeve Ryan. If Avery and Mulciber had been displeased about sharing a table with a Gryffindor - or as Sirius insisted: if they had been displeased about sitting near a muggle-born - that feeling seemed now to be mirrored in Ryan and Macdonald, who seemed to regard Snape with dislike.

Unexpectedly, at least if you weren't sharing a table with Sirius and James, Snape and Evans' cauldron exploded, sending potion flying everywhere and causing shrieking students to hide under tables and chairs.

'A rare mistake,' professor Slughorn observed after he had finally calmed the class down (which was made more challenging by the fact that it had taken the professor some time to steady his own nerves).

Snape seemed about to argue, but Evans' just smiled and said: 'we must both have been adding the powdered unicorn horn, Sir. Silly mistake, really.'

'As always, you are spot on, miss Evans. It must certainly have been a double dose of powdered unicorn horn. With such fine potion understanding, I would be a fool not to award Gryffindor 5 points.'

It was clear to Remus that Snape knew exactly what had happened (as did Evans from the distasteful look she sent Sirius and James), and the idea that Gryffindor was awarded points for Sirius and James deliberately sabotaging his potion seemed to render the boy entirely speechless. He looked daggers at Sirius and James, and despite the fact that Remus could understand Snape's frustration, he felt a sense of unease for his two friends, who despite his continued better judgement, Remus had come to care about.

Sirius and James, however, were flushed with delight at their success, which was further crowned by the following two achievements: professor Slughorn pronounced their potion to be the best (now that Evans and Snape had nothing to show) and looking exhausted (no doubt due to the chaos earlier), professor Slughorn forgot to remind Sirius to stay behind.

'Lets do the flying now, in our free period. There will be fewer teachers and students about,' James suggested, practically bouncing up the stairs from the dungeon.

Macdonald agreed readily, but Remus just nodded. He really wasn't sure this was a good idea. There was nothing he wanted more than to trust James and Sirius, but judging by everything he had seen, it was hard to put much faith in their judgement.

Sirius seemed to have picked up on his hesitation, because he said: 'Mate, I mean it, James knows his way around a broom, and Pete and I will be there too.'

James looked over at Remus, catching Sirius' words. In an instant he was by Remus' side and put a hand around his shoulder: 'We'll look after you, Remus, you know that, don't you?'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

James Potter did his utmost to contain his excitement at the prospect of showing his fellow Gryffindors the magic of flying. There was nothing like the freedom of having a broom underneath you, which could take you wherever you wanted to go, the wind ruffling your hair and the spectacular views otherwise only afforded to flying creatures.

It pleased James immensely that despite seeming somewhat daunted at the idea of flying, Remus seemed quite pleased once he was on a broom. Not that this had surprised James, flying was GREAT. Although Remus was cautious and didn't fly particularly high or fast, he was well capable of flying around with Sirius and Peter after James had shown him the basics.

Mary Macdonald, on the other hand, had a scare pretty early on when she lost control of the broom and shot forward about thirty feet before she threw herself on the ground in fright. James eventually decided to have her on his own broom for a bit, just to let her get the feel of flying. Despite the fact that James was confident he had gone neither fast nor high, Mary slapped him when they landed, telling him she wouldn't have accepted had she known he would be flying so recklessly.

Eventually though, Mary was able to kick-off and steer the broom fairly well, at which point Remus and Mary agreed that they had flown quite enough for one day. Sirius and Peter, like James, wanted to fly a bit more, this time at their own speed and Remus and Mary agreed to watch them fly, before they could all head back to the castle.

'Black! Pettigrew! Potter - don't think I didn't see you!' Professor McGonagall's voice rang out as James was putting the broom he had borrowed back into the broomshed.

Mary and Remus, like James, were covered from McGonagall's sight, and without being fully conscious of having made the decision, James pushed Mary and Remus into the shed before closing the door. The odds were good McGonagall didn't know they were there, as they had been on the ground when the three others had been flying, and she hadn't called out their names. 

Then James stepped out to face his Transfiguration professor.

'Pete looks way too happy for someone who got themselves a detention,' Sirius observed quietly, shooting the boy a displeased look as they made their way up to the Astronomy tower for their first midnight lesson later that evening.

James was in no mood to entertain his friend, so he made no reply.

'I bet you he's pleased because he gets to serve it with us. He's pathetic,' Sirius pushed.

'Does it matter?' James asked annoyed. He would have been genuinely curious about why this seemed to bother Sirius, except...

'Pull yourself together mate,' Sirius said impatiently. 'I know McGonagall threatened with giving you detention on Friday, but she didn't, did she?'

It was true. James and Sirius, having already been caught flying without permission once, had gotten a week's worth of detention, starting Monday. Professor McGonagall had also taken away 10 points each from Gryffindor. Peter, however, had escaped with one detention on Monday and no points taken.

The punishment hadn't bothered James in the slightest. A week's worth of detention with Sirius would be a laugh. No, what had really upset him was the threat McGonagall had made: any more news about him breaking any broom-related rules would result in a detention this Friday, which would prevent him from participating in the Quidditch try-outs. This meant no more unsupervised flying practice ahead of Friday evening, but what's more:

'You do realise this means no fun in flying lessons tomorrow,' James pointed out.

Sirius stopped dead: 'I hadn't thought of that.'

Peter nearly crashed into Sirius.

'Something the matter?' Remus asked.

'Nothing,' Sirius said lazily, but James could tell that his friend had now caught the gravity of the situation. The scope to have fun with Snivellus had narrowed dramatically.

They continued up the stairs.

Sirius sighed as they reached the top: 'Oh well, I'm not going to the try-outs, so I can have all the fun.'

Charms the following morning allowed James to continue his testing of the professors by once more admitting to not having done his homework, and asking professor Flitwick if he could just do a verbal submission instead. Professor Flitwick agreed, and once James had finished, the professor asked him some questions. Satisfied by the answers (naturally, as they were all correct), professor Flitwick accepted James' way of submitting his homework ('this once, Mr Potter'). No points were taken either.

'Potter, why d'you keep doing that thing?' Mary asked as they headed towards Transfiguration.

'What thing?' James asked, pretending not to understand.

'The homework thing.'

'He does it to show off,' Lily said, voice laced with disapproval.

'Evans, you underestimate me.'

'There is method to his madness,' Sirius added.

James had never told Sirius what he was doing, but he wasn't surprised that Sirius, at least, had caught on.

'Yes, it is madness. Now come on Mary, we really don't -'

'No, I want to know, Lily. So why d'you do it?'

'Have a guess,' James said, enjoying the attention Mary was giving him. It was especially fun as it seemed to annoy Lily, who huffed and seemed to consider leaving them all behind.

'Anyone?' James asked, as Mary made no reply.

'You've not repeated it with Professor McGonagall,' Remus said, furrowing his eyebrows and looking like he was considering the matter carefully, 'either because she didn't accept it and you therefore don't want to cross her again, or because you're only doing it once to each professor, for some reason.'

'Or both,' James said, glad to see that his friends seemed brighter than the Gryffindor girls. (But then again, the Gryffindor girls were... well, girls...)

'I am gathering data,' James continued, 'I am testing to see how the different professors react to bending the rules a little. But I don't think I'll ever repeat the thing with old McGonagall. Who knows, I might find a professor who actually likes a bit of a laugh.'

'So you go through all this effort to learn your homework, to not hand it in?' Mary asked incredulously.

'Madness,' Lily muttered, shaking her head.

'No effort required,' James said, feeling proud, 'I know it all...'

James had always known he'd be one of the best in school. He was aware not everyone remembered everything the way he did, and with parents like his, how could he not be talented? But it didn't stop him from enjoying the feeling of admiration from fellow classmates and teachers as he proved just how smart he was.

'Sirius has a very good memory too,' Peter said admiringly.

Peter was actually quite good fun - and he seemed to like Sirius and James, which was why James could not understand why Sirius had taken such a dislike to the boy.

'Nah, I can tell you how to treat werewolf bites, but James can tell you what bloody page the instructions are on,' Sirius said. James guessed he had chosen a topic that was not likely to come up for some time soon to prove his point.

'Werewolf bites? We've not learned anything about werewolves,' Mary said.

'It's not for ages,' James said, 'but it's in Defence Against the Dark Arts.'

'Chapter 17,' Remus said. Sirius looked in surprise at Remus.

Remus had so far been quite quiet in class, and hadn't proven himself as talented as James and Sirius on the whole; but then again, James supposed it was too early to tell. In Charms, Remus seemed quite capable - even a little ahead of James and Sirius.

James was pleased - his dad had showed him that being smart could often mean being fun too, as his dad had many crazy ideas that he put into practice. He'd never wanted to be a Ravenclaw (like his mother); because there was just something boring about the pursuit of knowledge for the sake of it. But to put knowledge into practice to make discoveries and go on adventures, that was more his thing. So talented Gryffindors was exactly what James was on the look-out for.

'The treatment of the bites are on page 276,' James supplied, feeling he had to prove Sirius' point. Sirius rolled his eyes, but then he winked once nobody else saw him, and James grinned at his friend.

They had nearly reached the Transfiguration classroom, but this didn't stop Lily from pulling her friend away from the boys and once they lined up outside the classroom, James noticed that Lily and Mary (the latter less likely out of choice) kept their distance.

'What's your problem?' Sirius asked Lily as they all headed out for their flying lesson just before three thirty that afternoon. She had continued to be unusually cold ('even for her' as Sirius observed).

'I know you sabotaged our potion yesterday,' she said, glaring at them.

Oh, she was upset about that... Really, James had almost forgotten it was their potion they had blown up. It had been a brilliant prank, and Gryffindor had even gained points - thanks in part to Lily.

James exchanged a look with Sirius.

'So why didn't you tell your precious Slughorn?' Sirius asked.

'Because she's not a snitch,' James said.

James was surprised at Sirius' question. Gryffindors didn't turn each other in. Remus was right, they were all on the same team. It was why (James had decided) he had pushed Mary and Remus out of the way when McGonagall caught them yesterday evening. Gryffindors had to have each other's back.

'Trust me... if I had even the slightest bit of evidence, I would have reported you. But it would have been my word against yours.'

James didn't believe her in the slightest.

'I don't get it... Slughorn would have taken your word for it in an instant,' Sirius said, clearly not believing her either.

'Against two purebloods?' Lily asked, raising an eyebrow, and Sirius grimaced ever so slightly.

'Horace doesn't care about that - you're his favourite student,' James pointed out.

'Yes... despite the fact that I am muggle-born, as he likes to remind me.'

'Come off it, Evans. You're treated just as well as the rest of us,' James continued, but then again... 'except maybe by the Slytherins... but... but that's your fault for hanging out with them.'

'Who I chose to hang out with is none of your business, Potter,' Lily said fiercely.

'Just admit it,' James said, 'you didn't rat on us because Gryffindors have to stick together.'

Lily stopped and grabbed James' arm, forcing him to stop too.

Her emerald eyes met his and he was surprised at the hostility reflected in them. Come to think of it, her grip was pretty firm too: 'Let me make one thing clear: I have NO intention of sticking together with any of you, ever.'

James twisted his arm free of her grip.

'Fine,' he said, trying to sound unaffected. In reality he was disgusted by the lack of house loyalty, and a little... disappointed. Lily was smart, and she had shown some real cheek with professor Slughorn in their potion classes. She could have been fun, if she wasn't so stuck up.

Lily marched off. 

Sirius put an arm around James and called out after Lily: 'Oh my sweet Rose... whatever shall we do without you?' 

'Rose?' James asked.

'Red on top... prickly personality.'

'I don't get her...'

'She's a girl,' Sirius said as if that explained everything. And it sort of did. 'They're no fun, any of them... ouch!'

Maeve Ryan had suddenly appeared from nowhere and punched Sirius' arm. 

'What did you do that for?' Sirius asked. 

Maeve just raised an eyebrow.

'You don't count,' James said.

'You're hardly a girl,' Sirius agreed, rubbing his arm, 'except you punch like one.'

This might have earned Sirius another punch, James didn't know. Just then he spotted about twenty broomsticks lying on the ground, and he raced over to make sure he got as good a broom as he could get.

To James' pleasure, no Gryffindor let him down. Mary seemed to have regained her confidence and was flying as far and as fast as she was allowed to. James was particularly pleased about this because Sirius had told him last evening that James had, in fact, been flying faster than he probably ought to with Mary sat behind him on the broom. But now she zoomed around with as much skill as anyone flying for the second time could plausibly demonstrate. Even Lily, who had never been on a broom before, mounted her broom with confidence and flew almost as well as Remus and Mary.

Even better, James and Sirius' bet that Snape was an appalling flyer turned out to be correct. James, who knew he had to be careful about following Madam Hooch's instructions, nevertheless made sure to nearly crash into a nervous Snape as often as he could get away with it. Of course, he would never actually cause him any harm, but it was hilarious to watch how the slime ball would close his eyes in fright. Every. Single. Time. This look of terror was usually quickly changed to one of fury and embarrassment, as Snape surely realised how silly it was of him to flinch when there was no real danger.

James also enjoyed the admiration from his fellow classmates. Just as he had known he would be amongst the top students in his classes, he had always been confident his skills on the broom would be far superior to anyone else in his year. How could they not be? Sarah often told him how good he was, how he would have given Alex a run for her galleons. 

Flying was something James was naturally good at, and it was something he did all the time. Sarah had shown him that being good was not going to be enough to get him onto the English Quidditch team - great wouldn't even cut it - exceptional was what he had to aim for (that was what would win you the World Cup); and to do that he worked hard to improve his existing talent. James was a good flyer - and one day, he would become the best. 

Flying around, he might have pushed the envelope a little in terms of what they were asked to do, but he kept an eye on Madam Hooch, and while she scolded him a little, her face told him that she was impressed. Of course she was.

Sirius, who had no try-outs to attend, was bolder than James and James cheered on his friend when Sirius did a particularly daring stunt or came especially close to crashing into Snape. Sirius might not be as good a flyer as James, but he was confident enough on a broom to make quite the show.

Until...

WHAM!

Instead of stopping, Sirius had flown straight into Snape. The force knocked them both of their brooms and they slammed into the ground, which was thankfully not far beneath them. Still, it was a far enough fall that James' stomach twisted in fear, and he immediately turned his broom. In an instant he was next to his friend. 

Sirius had rolled around to minimise the impact of the fall, and was now a few yards from Snape. Sirius got up quickly, brushing his robes. Snape, however, howled in pain, clutching his wrist.

'Git should learn to land better,' Sirius said dispassionately as he observed the scene.

'You okay?' James asked Sirius, but he could already tell Sirius was fine. 

Although he didn't quite know why yet, James felt a sinking sensation in his stomach.

'Sprained wrist,' Madam Hooch muttered, leaning over a tear stricken Snape, 'you'll be alright boy. Up you get.'

Madam Hooch helped Snape up, and announced the end of the lesson, asking everyone to leave the brooms out for her to collect later. 

The Slytherins looked angrily towards Sirius and James, but nobody seemed keen to avenge Snape's fate. Instead, two of the Slytherin girls kicked-off again once Madam Hooch was gone, throwing the Gryffindors one final nasty look before they did, and the rest of the Slytherins headed back towards the castle. 

James relaxed the grip on his wand, only then noticing he'd clutched it from the moment Sirius was on his feet. Not knowing many spells, he had at least known what hex to use should it have been necessary, but this poor repertoire of spells needed to be fixed soon.

Sirius half-heartedly suggested they should copy the pair of Slytherin girls and keep flying, but he seemed to know that James wasn't interested. It wasn't just the fact that McGonagall would certainly give him a detention on Friday, James also had a sneaking suspicion Sirius had meant to fly into Snape. And this worried James.

Lily Evans had gone after Snape and Madam Hooch, but otherwise the Gryffindors were waiting for Sirius and James to join them. It seemed they, like James, were prepared to defend Sirius should it be necessary. Whether they, like James, suspected Sirius had deliberately knocked Snape off his broom, James didn't know.

James didn't really know why he felt so bothered about the whole thing. Surely, Sirius had just misjudged the situation. Only... Sirius had also tripped up Peter on the stairs their first morning. So, maybe he had meant it?

James felt a strong affection towards Sirius: Sirius was exactly everything James had wished for in a friend - a best friend - and yet, there was something more ... not violent, of course, but... something more aggressive about the way Sirius dealt with things. And it worried James.

'That Snape is such a cry-baby,' Elizabeth Vane said, as soon as James and Sirius approached.

'I don't understand what Evans sees in him,' Gemma Dawlish agreed.

'Aye, but she's a bit strange, that one,' Maeve Ryan said, shaking her head.

'You're really good on a broom, Potter,' Elizabeth observed. 

'That he is. You could really make the team, Potter. You know that, don't you?' 

'So could you,' James said, trying to bury his uneasy feeling about Sirius.

In truth, he hadn't really watched Maeve Ryan's flying, but he was still worried she wouldn't show up to the try-outs, so he wanted to encourage her. The surest way to fail is not to try, as his father kept telling him.

At dinner, they learned from Lily Evans (via Mary Macdonald) that Madam Pomfrey had fixed Snape's wrist within a minute, and James felt himself relax. 

It must have been an accident, naturally. Now that he thought of it, the whole thing had been quite fun. The event had proven what a weak loser Snape really was, crying about something as minor as a sprained wrist. And Sirius hadn't gotten injured at all, because Sirius knew what he was on about. If Snape had just been a little bit better at falling, it would have been fine.

Remus and Peter returned to the common room to start a Herbology essay that was due for Monday morning. James and Sirius decided to do a bit more exploring. They could do the essay on Sunday. 

'We could go to the library,' James suggested after they had successfully discovered a secret passageway behind the statue of Gregory the Smarmy, which they suspected led out of the school, but which they decided to explore fully with Peter and Remus over the weekend.

'Library?' Sirius asked like he'd never heard of the thing.

'Y'know, full of books,' James teased.

'And usually accompanied with the requirement to be quiet, something you are incapable of.'

James threw his friend a dirty look.

'Why in Merlin's name would you want to go there?'

'I thought we'd look for spells. For duelling, I mean,' James explained.

James had no warning. Nothing to help him make sense of what happened next, except a sensation of hitting the stone surface hard. Then his brain caught up. Sirius had pushed James out of the way. Way of what?

James looked up in time to see a streak of dark purple hit Sirius in his right shoulder, and Sirius's knees buckled as he cried out in pain.

James rolled around on the ground and pushed himself up within a matter of moments. He could just see the back of Snape's greasy head.

For a second James considered going after him. James was quick, he could catch Snape, no trouble. Looking down, however, James saw his friend rolling around in pain, and he thought the better of it.

'Hey, Sirius, mate,' James knelt down next to his friend.

Sirius' eyes were screwed shut and his breathing was coming out in painful gulps. His left hand was grasping thin air just above his right shoulder, like he was fighting the urge to clutch his injury.

James took Sirius' left hand: 'Just squeeze as tightly as you need to,' he offered.

The corridor was empty, James realised as he scanned the narrow hallway for people to help. He had no idea what to do. His brain - his brilliant, reliable brain - was failing him.

Seeing Sirius in so much pain was too much for James. He felt pathetic in comparison to his friend who was really suffering, and yet, James felt as if he was enduring the pain alongside him. It was made a thousand times worse for the fact that Snape must have aimed for James, from behind his back, and Sirius had stupidly gotten James out of the way. James should be the one to suffer, not his friend.

What should he do?

Never, never again. That's what he should do. Never again would he allow his friends to suffer. Surely being hit by whatever curse this was must be better than the agony of watching Sirius - or anyone he cared about - in so much pain; especially when he was so bloody useless. 

He was failing Sirius.

James decided to take a look at Sirius' shoulder. He had no idea what he would do with the information, but it gave him something to do. He wished Remus was here. 

Remus was calm, always, and would have known what to do. Remus also knew a severing charm, which would have been helpful. It was a struggle, especially as he tried to handle Sirius with care, but once he got a tear in Sirius' school robes, he could rip the rest open to reveal his shoulder. 

James' first instinct was to be sick all over his friend, but fighting this he said as calmly as he could: 'Merlin, you're making such a fuss over nothing.'

It wasn't nothing, but Sirius didn't need to know that. The dark purple colour that was, somehow, Sirius shoulder, seemed to coil and twist. It was like the worst bruise James could ever have imagined, except it was also living, pulsing, terrorising. James suspected (without understanding quite how) that it was this movement that caused Sirius so much pain. 

This wasn't a simple hex. 

James realised he had gotten the wrong measure of Snape entirely. This was terrible magic nobody should know how to yield. The thought made James want to be sick again. 

'What's going on?' asked a voice, and James looked up to see a boy, not much older than himself, with dark skin and thick dark hair. 

'My friend - he got cursed - he... he needs help, I - his shoulder... help...' James struggled to get the words out. 

The boy nodded once, and then said: 'wait here.'

There had been a calm, but serious, confidence about the other boy that helped James relax - a little.

'See, we're going to get you some help - and you'll be alright. It's nothing big anyways, like I told you. It's just... best get an adult to take a look, y'know. You'll be right as rain... in no time... It'll be alright. We'll go to the library after... Find a good hex to get back at Snivellus.'

James was well aware he was babbling, but he wasn't sure what else to do.

'J'ms, sh't up,' Sirius said through gritted teeth.

So James did just that.

Thinking of what his mother did to him when he was in pain, James used his free hand to stroke Sirius forehead and run his fingers through his hair. Sirius didn't protest at this, so James assumed he was doing something right.

A gasp made him look up. Madame Maxwell came hurrying over with the boy from earlier close on her heels. 

It was the first time James saw his Defence Against the Dark Arts professor and didn't immediately get lost in her magical moss-coloured eyes, which so beautifully complemented her thick chestnut hair, her kind expression and the air she gave of being a proper (and pretty badass) lady. Or... if he got lost, he found himself quickly. 

'It's Sirius, professor, he's -'

'Monsieur Shacklebolt told me... but zis is... oh, mon petit! Let me 'ave a look.' 

She quickly got down on her knees, and James was pleased she didn't ask him to move. Sirius had not let go of James' arm, and James would never be the one to let go of his friend. 

James didn't know a whole lot about friends. He had mostly had family growing up - and that was... fine. They were pleasant and fun and loving. But now that he had a real friend, he was determined to be the best friend he could be. After all, James Potter never did anything half-way.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Cutting it fine, I see,' the Fat Lady observed as Lily gave her the password to enter the Gryffindor Tower a little after curfew that Thursday. There was no air left in her lungs to defend against the accusation - Lily had surprised herself when she had been able to splutter out the password in the first place.

Lily didn't mind breaking rules, but there was a time and a place, and this was not it. Thus, she had been a little flustered when she realised that she had lost track of time with Severus in the library. He had been a little less worried upon discovering what time it was, but then again, he didn't have to make it up several staircases to get to his common room.

No sooner had Lily surveyed the relatively empty common room before the portrait hole swung open once more, and James Potter crawled inside.

Usually, Lily would have rushed upstairs to the girls dormitories as soon as she spotted Black and Potter, but the sight of Potter alone surprised her enough to cause her to stop.

Lily realised she had never seen one without the other.

One quick look at Potter's drawn features reminded her that Sirius Black had been attacked by another student. Some Ravenclaws a few years above Lily and Severus had been discussing it in the library. It sounded horrific.

Severus seemed entirely disinterested in the whole thing, and had questioned her interest in the matter. She didn't blame him. Black and Potter had been awful towards them both, but especially Severus.

The thing was, though, it wasn't about Black, not really. What had caught Lily's attention was the idea that a first year could be seriously attacked by another student. That was bad - unsafe. Or rather, it hadn't been about Black until she ran into his best friend.

Black and Potter were idiots, but they didn't deserve this.

'Is Bl- Sirius going to be okay?' Lily asked. It didn't feel like the time to use last names.

More emotions crossed Potter's face in the following few seconds than Lily had thought the boy capable off. He looked surprised, possibly at the question, then he looked angry - scratch that, he looked furious - then that faded and Potter looked worried, sad, and finally, just lost.

'He's...' Potter seemed unsure what to say. It was so unlike him that Lily started to worry.

'James,' Lily said, trying to sound as comforting as she could.

It was bewildering to see James Potter so unlike himself. Black was going to be okay, wasn't he?

'NO-' Potter spat, his cheeks growing red with anger again. 'You don't get to "James" me anything.'

Lily took a step back. What was going on?

'Snivellus did this!' Potter said, now shaking with emotions. 'He hurt Sirius! It was dark magic!'

No, he was lying. He had to be.

'He's twisted!' Potter shouted.

The few students that were still in the common room all stared at the two of them.

It wasn't true. She had been with Severus. If Severus had done this then surely...

'Why haven't the teachers punished him? Why didn't they come and find him?'

Lily was right. She knew she was. No professor would have let an attack like this slide.

Potter let out a sound somewhere between a laugh and a cry of frustration.

'Yeah right! This might sound familiar, Evans, but the professors didn't take our words for it.'

Just like she had told Potter professor Slughorn wouldn't have taken her and Severus' word about the ruined potion. Yes, that was familiar.

But that hadn't been the full truth. Lily believed it possible - maybe probable - that professor Slughorn wouldn't have taken her word for it, but she hadn't snitched because she wasn't like her sister. Petunia always ran home to their parents and told on Lily. Lily had sworn never to be like her. It just was too much having James Potter believing she had their back or something.

Lily also didn't need to snitch because she believed that what goes around, comes around. Was this attack Severus' way of ensuring just that?

'You're lying,' Lily said, but she wasn't quite sure she believed her own words.

'Am not! The professors don't think he's capable of that sort of magic. He shouldn't be! But I saw it!'

Lily didn't know what to say. People were muttering among themselves. Potter was destroying her friend's reputation with false rumours. They were false. They had to be.

'Severus is good! He'd never-' Lily started, feeling her eyes burn.

'I know you think I'm... Merlin knows what,' Potter said stubbornly, 'but I am not lying!'

'You can't - he wouldn't -'

Unable to articulate her own words, Lily did the second best thing. She removed herself from the situation. It didn't stop her from hearing Potter's last reply: 'He did!'

Lily was glad none of the girls in her year had been downstairs to witness the exchange between her and Potter. Although she already knew enough about Hogwarts to know that they would learn about it soon enough.

Lily needed time, and she needed to speak to Severus. She also needed sleep, but sleep evaded her for hours, as she replayed her evening with Severus and her fight with Potter. Her final comforting thought was that Severus had always helped her make sense of things before, and she had to believe he could do that now too.

Mary, curious to a fault, had pretended to have a stomach ache the following morning, so that she could go to the Hospital Wing to see what state Black was in. Black had been hidden behind some privacy screens, so the mission might have failed had it not been for Potter. Potter had similarly stopped by the Hospital Wing and Mary had found the matron arguing with the boy, who wanted to see his friend.

Walking to breakfast with a disappointed James Potter, Mary had learned that Black was likely to remain in the Hospital Wing until Saturday or Sunday. It didn't sound good. What's more, Potter had repeated his conviction that it was Severus who had attacked Black.

'I am not sure what to make of that,' Mary confessed to Maeve and Lily.

'Potter has no reason to lie,' Maeve observed.

'Potter has every reason to lie,' Lily said, knowing this to be true. 'He hates Severus; he and Black both.'

'Ah, nah... They might've given the lad a hard time - not that I blame 'em - but hatred... that's a unforgiving word, that is.'

'Whatever he might have felt before, I can tell you that Potter hates Snape now, that's for sure. If I was Snape I'd try to avoid Potter for the foreseeable future,' Mary observed, glancing over at Potter, who was sitting with Lupin and Pettigrew further down the table. His plate was empty and he looked just as angry as yesterday.

'D'ye think they knew each other before Hogwarts - Black and Potter, I mean?' Maeve asked.

'No idea, but they're good friends, aren't they? No wonder Potter is upset with Snape. Imagine if it was your friend?'

'Stop talking as if it's true that Severus attacked Black - we don't know that!' Lily said, feeling angry with the girls.

'Aye, but who else had the motive, Lily?'

'Why don't you ask Snape - he's your friend?' Mary asked.

Lily looked over to the Slytherin table. Asking Severus had already been on her mind, and as they had double potions together, she had planned to go down with him in any case.

Severus seemed nearly done with his breakfast. Yes, she would ask.

'Maybe I will,' Lily said and pushed herself up from the Gryffindor table.

Walking over to the Slytherin table, she tried to ignore how the Slytherins were throwing her dirty looks. The house rivalry between Slytherin and Gryffindor was very real. Lily had never seen another Gryffindor or Slytherin visit the other's table. But Lily had never cared about stuff like that before, and Hogwarts wasn't going to change her.

'Look, it's your mudblood friend,' Mulciber said loud enough for Lily to hear as she approached. Those around Mulciber started looking at her with even more dislike.

Lily had no idea what "mudblood" meant, but she could guess it wasn't something nice. Partly because Mulciber had never said anything nice to her, and partly because Severus' jaw clenched and he hissed out: 'don't call her that.'

Yeah, definitely not a nice thing.

'Oh give it a rest, Mulciber,' Eloise Rosier said. 'She's the first Gryffindor I've met to leave her shitty table and come here. That must count for something.'

Eloise Rosier moved to make space for her: 'Do you want to sit down at the better table?'

Lily hadn't wanted to, but she did. She wasn't sure if she agreed with Eloise Rosier or disliked her for the way she talked about Gryffindor.

'You're only nice to her to piss off Evan,' Avery said, spitefully.

'Two things can be true at once,' Rosier said dismissively. 'I am not sure we've formally met, but I am Eloise Rosier and this is Georgiana Selwyn.'

Eloise pointed to a girl that sat on her other side. Lily knew very well who Georgiana Selwyn was - she was possibly the most beautiful girl Lily had ever encountered. Just looking at her now, Lily became suddenly very aware of her own shortcomings. Georgiana had tied her dark hair back with just the right number of perfect curls hanging loosely on either side of her face. Her dark eyes were soft and complemented her hair, and her face was symmetrical, lean and she looked a lot older than 11, somehow. 

'You have already had the misfortune of meeting Avery and Mulciber. They're about as bad as my brother, Evan. That's him,' Eloise said, pointing at a boy a little further down the table. They both had dark blonde hair, and similar noses, but other than that, Eloise and Evan didn't look too much like one another. Evan looked almost sickly thin, his cheeks hollow and he sat straight backed, with a sombre expression as he talked to a boy across from him. He appeared to be very deliberate in his movements. Eloise, however, had a round face and while some might call her plump, Lily just thought she looked healthy. She sat and acted with far less deliberation.

Avery and Mulciber ignored Eloise Rosier's comment, but Severus, later, on their walk to Potions, seemed to want to defend the boys: 'They're not bad, Avery and Mulciber. They're just... well... they don't know you like I do.'

Lily had made sure they had left a little ahead of the others, so she could speak to Severus about Black and Potter. Because of this, she didn't bother arguing with Severus about the very obvious fact that people should be nice to people, even before they got to know them. Nor was there any point in telling Severus that she found it unfair that they had taken a dislike to her because of her house (something she couldn't help) and the fact that she wasn't from a wizarding family (which she really couldn't help).

'Sev, the attack on Black...' Lily began, unsure what to say.

'What about it?' Severus asked with a hint of impatience.

'Potter said it was - well, that it was you who attacked Black.'

'And you believe Potter?'

Severus looked outraged.

Relief flooded Lily: 'So it's not true then?'

Lily's heart sank as her friend made no reply.

'Oh my God, it is true. No, please tell me you didn't do it. Potter said it was dark magic.'

'And what makes Potter the expert?'

'It- Black, he's not well. He's going to be in the Hospital Wing for days. That's... that's not good, Sev.'

'They had it coming! I meant to hit that berk Potter, but Black probably deserved it more.'

'No, I can't accept this! You didn't - you can't mean that!'

'They hurt me too, Lily, or have you forgotten that? Black pushed me off a broom. I - my wrist got sprained. I had to go to the Hospital Wing too!'

'It was an accident!'

Lily wasn't sure why she was defending Black.

'You know it wasn't!' Severus spat.

Maybe she did know - or suspect, at least. Severus was probably right. He often was. Yet, it didn't make what her friend had done okay. What Severus had done was worse than crashing into a fellow student - on purpose or not. ('Twisted' came to mind, but no, Potter got that wrong.)

Why was crashing into someone less bad than cursing them? A voice that wanted to defend Severus asked. Because it was - it was just something Lily knew, the way she knew day from night. 

It was the difference between mean and cruelty. Black had been thoughtless and arrogant - he had crashed into Severus because it seemed 'fun', but Sirius had not deliberately grabbed Severus' hand or in any way tried to force an injury. The injury was a bi-product, a side-effect. It was stupid and mean. The curse was deliberately cast to cause pain. That was cruelty. 

But her Severus was not cruel.

A branch came crashing down and hit Petunia's shoulder. Lily was back at home, and she and Severus had been discussing Dementors. But that had been an accident, Lily thought desperately. He hadn't - we were still learning to control our magic.

'Don't sink to their level,' Lily said finally, noticing how her best friend was looking at her intensely and deciding to quiet the voice in her head that told her - that shouted at her - that Severus had sunk far further than Black and Potter.

'You're better than that, Sev. You're better than them.'

He was a thousand times better than those arrogant berks. Severus was the best person she knew, and he had endured so much. Whenever he did something like this, it was because he didn't know any better. His awful father had taken one of the most gentle souls in all of England and crushed him. Severus needed love, and nobody had been there to show him any. That was Lily's job. She would show him unconditional love, she would be his family.

'Does a bee sting if it's threatened? Why should I not be allowed to do the same?' Severus asked, looking desperately at her, as if he needed her approval. As if he was disappointed she hadn't taken his side. But she had. She would always take his side.

'I... I am only worried about you,' Lily said, taking his hand. 'You're my best friend. I don't want you to get expelled over something - someone - like Black or Potter. You're infinitely more important.'

That he was. He was her best friend.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'My favourite badger,' Fabian exclaimed happily as Alice Fawley came over to the Gryffindor table at dinner. 

'Mind if I join you?' Alice asked.

'Make space, Gid,' Fabian said, winking at his brother the moment Alice turned her head towards her own table.

Gideon's fork fell to the floor as he made space for Alice, and Fabian had to fight hard not to laugh at his brother's unusually flustered manners. Normally, it was Fabian who was the clumsy one (or 'careless' as Molly put it), but Fabian had observed that putting Gideon in a room with Alice tended to produce this effect in his brother. At least it had since Alice had come to visit over the summer.

The fact that his brother had fallen for Fabian's (and Gideon's own) best friend would probably have bothered Fabian a great deal more if it wasn't for the fact that Alice so clearly reciprocated the feelings. After a week with the two of them over the summer, Fabian had decided he wanted nothing more than for the two of them to get on with it. But that wasn't going to be easy.

Both Gideon and Alice seemed unwilling to even entertain the idea that the other could possibly feel anything more than friendship. Merlin help them all.

'I can't stay long, I just wanted to see how you're both doing ahead of the try-outs,' Alice said, nevertheless accepting some pumpkin juice, which Fabian poured out for her. He had decided neither Alice nor Gideon were to be trusted with this task in each other's company lest he wanted his dinner drenched in juice.

'Fabian has nothing to be nervous about - he's the only bloody player guaranteed a spot,' Gideon said. 

Fabian had known Alice for as long as he could remember - and for all that time, she had known Gideon too, so he couldn't understand how she could possibly fail to pick up the nervousness in Gideon's voice when he spoke to her nowadays.

'Yeah, I only got to worry about everyone else - should be a laugh,' Fabian said, rolling his eyes visibly and trying his best to maintain normality, for the sake of his best friend, brother and himself.  

'I heard a second-year fell off his broom during the Ravenclaw try-outs yesterday. Had to go to the Hospital Wing,' Alice said, tentatively.

'Yes that right, they needed to reschedule the rest of the try-outs for tomorrow,' Fabian confirmed. 

Owen Redpath had been as surprised as any when he received his captain badge this summer, writing immediately to Fabian in shock. Everyone had expected Regina Hooch, Madam Hooch's niece and keeper for Ravenclaw, to become the captain. They were fairly evenly matched, though Fabian thought (knowing he was probably biased) that Owen was just that bit better than Hooch. So it would seem professor Flitwick thought too, because Owen had indeed got the badge. Muggle-born, never been on a broom before Hogwarts, and now captain. Fabian had been both impressed and thrilled.

The pressure Owen felt to deliver, however, had already been weighing on him, so that when this accident happened yesterday, he had been devestated. Fabian, the only other new captain that year, felt it necessary to go and find his friend as soon as he heard. He had tried not to think too much about how good it had felt to put his arm around Owen to comfort him. Of course, it felt good to know you could be there for someone. There was nothing more to it.

Fabian noticed Alice' warm eyes study him. 

'I am sure it's not a welcome reminder of your responsibilities out there today,' she said kindly. 

She was good, Alice was. The best girl Fabian knew. He was happy she and Gideon seemed to have fallen for each other. There was no better man out there either, as far as Fabian was concerned.

'He'll be fine,' Gideon said, 'it's me you've got to worry about - what if there's some ruddy second or third year who's a much better beater than me.'

And that was what was needed for Gideon to be more like himself again: his overprotective brother instinct. Naturally, Gideon knew that Fabian was nervous, especially with what had happened yesterday, and Gideon - and Alice for that matter - could set aside their feelings to cheer him up or (try to) avert his attention. Well, Fabian was glad he could be of some use to the two.

'Yeah, because that's likely,' Fabian scoffed. Gideon was a bloody fantastic beater. 

'You're brilliant, Gid, I'm sure you've got nothing to worry about!' Alice said with such sincerity that Fabian was quite relieved to see Frank Longbottom (Head Boy badge as polished as always) look around, spot Gideon and make his way over to them. Fabian wasn't sure what other distraction he could come up with to save Alice from watching his brother become redder than the slices of tomato on his plate. 

'Gideon,' Longbottom said briskly, 'sorry to interrupt.'

'What's up?' Gideon asked, his cheeks bright red, but Alice's eyes where thankfully on the Head Boy.

'Richard Bones is feeling unwell, but he was meant to help professor Flitwick after dinner... Something to do with a rogue armour. Any chance you could help out instead?'

No, Fabian thought, but waited for his brother to reject the seventh year Gryffindor. Not that turning people down was Gideon's forte.

'Sorry Frank,' Gideon said, cheeks resuming their normal colour, 'you know I would do it if I could, but I am afraid I've got Quidditch try-outs. Got to prove my worth to the new captain,' here Gideon gestured towards Fabian. 

'If it was only practice...' Gideon let the incomplete sentence - the half-promise of ditching practice to help Longbottom - hang in the air.

If it was "only practice", Fabian still expected his brother to turn up, and he'd tell him that as soon as they left for the pitch, but now was not the moment, for many reasons. 

Gideon liked Longbottom, and Fabian knew Gideon felt some sort of responsibility for helping him settle in his new role.

Longbottom looked displeased, but collected himself quickly: 'Not to worry, I'll find someone else... Maybe Amelia. Good luck, Gideon. You too, Prewett.'

We're both called Prewett, Fabian thought, but he settled for an audible 'thanks, Longbottom.'  

'Is Longbottom giving you a hard time?' Alice asked quietly as they watched Frank Longbottom walk over to Amelia Bones, Richard's younger sister, and fellow prefect, at the Hufflepuff table. 'I heard from Amelia that he takes his job rather seriously.'

That he does, Fabian agreed silently.

'He's not bad - he's quite nice really,' Gideon said, 'He just doesn't get Quidditch.'

'He's not alone there,' Alice teased.

'You get Quidditch, you just don't have any house loyalty,' Fabian winked at her.

'Well, it's hard to cheer for your own house, if they are playing against your family.'

'Your brother is on your house team.'

'Yes, well, I don't want him to lose either,' Alice said. 'It's why I stay neutral when you guys play each other.'

'You don't have to. We don't mind,' Gideon said quickly. 

'It's not hard, really,' Fabian added, 'Just hold a yellow banner and clap loudly every time your house scores a goal or your brother saves a goal, not that either of those things are a frequent occurrence. As for Macmillan catching the snitch, that won't ever happen so you don't have to worry about that scenario... Alice, you're meant to find that insulting!'

'But it's true, we don't have the strongest line-up,' Alice said fairly. Then she looked guilty: 'Sorry, that's not what I meant. Frederick is doing a great job as a captain, he works Marshall and the rest of the team really hard, but they don't have the raw talent Gryffindor had last year.'

Well... that might be true, but that was because the previous captain had filled the team with seventh years, leaving Fabian with precious few candidates that had already played for Gryffindor.

'And this is why you're safer in Hufflepuff, despite all your bravery. You're too fair and honest for us lions,' Gideon said, putting an arm around Alice, clumsily, but successfully. 

The look of victory at having casually hugged Alice (something they had both done a million times before) remained on Gideon's face for the rest of the dinner - even as Alice left them - and Fabian hoped he could pull his brother back into Quidditch-mode before the try-outs, so that he could keep his brother on the team.

'You read the letter from Molls yet?' Fabian asked as they made their way down to the pitch (after having scolded his brother about his reply to Frank Longbottom).

Since leaving the Great Hall, Gideon had thankfully seemed to be more like himself.

'Yeah, but I know you haven't.' 

'I will, once these try-outs are over.'

'You'll do great! You're a natural leader, Fabian.'

'That's a lie, if ever I knew one. I am not like you and Molls.'

'But you're the best at Quidditch, which helps a long way when being the Quidditch captain.'

'So how is Molls?' Fabian asked, ignoring his brother's encouragement.

'Busy plotting the prospective marriage between William and Mary.'

'Of course she is.'

Mary McKinnon had been born in the last few days of August, to Molly's relief, so that William would start school with Molly's best friend's daughter. Of course, Molly was already planning for the two to fall in love.

'Not that - you know - all boys must fall in love with girls,' Gideon said quickly, throwing Fabian a side-ways glance. 

Not this, Fabian thought. Not now. He knew Gideon meant well, and he knew he would have to speak to Gideon about it eventually. But Fabian didn't know what to say, or what good talking would do, so he wanted to delay any conversation with his brother as long as he could - despite Gideon's many attempts to initiate a 'talk'.

'It's the way it usually goes, though,' Fabian said, 'not that I think even Molls and Marlene's efforts combined is ever going to sway any children of theirs - they are all going to be as determined as their mothers.'

Gideon recognised the dismissal.

They walked in silence for a bit. 

'Molls has been asked to be Mary's godmother,' Gideon said, eventually.

'No surprise there.' 

'Makes me feel a bit bad that I am William's godfather.'

'Don't Molls and Arthur want three children, like we were?'

'Two boys and a girl, just like us,' Gideon laughed, 'well, it worked out well, didn't it?'

'It worked well for two of us,' Fabian said, and though it was meant to be a stab at Gideon, Fabian felt it was too true, except the abnormal one was him. 

'In any case,' Fabian continued, trying not to dwell too much on his thoughts, 'it leaves one child for me and Marlene both to become godparents.'

On the Quidditch pitch, Fabian got other things to worry about. Nobody, other than Gideon, was trying out for beater, probably not believing Fabian to be just in his assessment. That wasn't great, but worse still only two people tried out for seeker - neither of them good. In the end he landed on Norman McLaggen, because he was young, only in his third year, providing greater opportunities for learning, and because his older brother Tiberius was an excellent flyer.

There were three people trying out for keeper - and none of them awful. He’d wanted to take Ciara Ryan’s sister, Maeve, knowing and valuing Ciara’s comradeship through their years on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Come to think of it, he had very much enjoyed their brother's comradeship too, but though Maeve was fairly decent, she was still small and still not as good as fellow sixth year Jay Jordan. So, however much he knew Ciara would be disappointed, he had to appoint Jay as his keeper.

The chasers ended up being where Fabian felt spoilt for choice. There were eight chasers competing for the three spots, all of them decent or better: four of them scored four or five out of five on the penalty shots. One of those who had scored four out of five shots was James Potter, who Fabian remembered talking to about his great aim, and who he later had learned from Jorkins (Merlin only knew how she had discovered this) was closely related to the Shafiq sisters. Where James fell short was game play. Ciara Ryan, Jenny Robins and Tiberius McLaggen were all better at passing the ball between them, and it helped, naturally, that they weren’t on school brooms.

Fabian would have loved to have offered a spot to James. Give him a few years, and Fabian was confident he'd be the best player on the team, if not the best player in the school. But Fabian had only two years as Quidditch captain, and he had to think about what was good for the team now, as well as the future. He hadn’t encouraged seventh years to turn up at the try outs for the need to have continuity, but at the same time he had chosen the best players he could get his hands on, which meant there was now three sixth years on the team. It was all a balancing act, and James Potter - just like Maeve Ryan - wasn't ready.

At some point during the try-outs, he’d spotted Alice in the stands, clearly having finished whatever had kept her from joining them for more than a glass of pumpkin juice earlier. Now that the try-outs were over, she rushed over to Fabian and Gideon and threw her arms around Fabian.

‘You’ve not come to spy on us, have you, you sly little badger?’ Fabian teased, feeling relieved the whole try-out business was done and dusted.

‘You did brilliantly,’ Alice said, squeezing him tightly.

Then she turned, and blushing profusely she hugged Gideon too.

‘Crushed the competition, I did,’ Gideon said, looking like he never wanted to let go of Alice.

‘Prewett,’ a voice sounded behind Fabian and he turned to see James Potter standing there.

Fabian was glad for the excuse to leave his brother and best friend, hoping, but not quite believing, that if he left the two long enough, they would finally sort things out.

He led the young boy away from the others as he asked what he could do for him. He expected Potter to ask for another chance or some feedback or something, but instead Potter surprised him by asking: ‘Can I be a reserve?’

Fabian hadn’t considered that. It was a great idea. In practice they could play two on two chasers and this way Fabian would be able to ensure that Potter did develop his skills without it interfering with the current performance of the team. Fabian would do more for the future of the team than his predecessor had, that was certain.

The only challenge Fabian could see with this solution was that the oldest chasers, Tiberius and Jenny, were both only in their fifth year. If Fabian was right about Potter, and he believed he was, then the chasers would know he could, and maybe would, replace one of them within a year or two. That didn't bode well for team spirits. But that was Fabian’s problem to deal with as a Captain. He had to do what was best for the team today and in the future.  

‘You’re on,’ he smiled and he watched as the messy haired boy smiled back.

‘Thanks Captain,’ Potter said, before running back to the stands where it looked like a small boy with mousy hair was waiting for him.

Thanks Captain. The words held promise to Fabian. Maybe he could do this captain thing after all.

He turned to see Gideon and Alice waiting for him. They were good friends to have, if not a little frustrating sometimes. He’d be happier seeing them walk off, having forgotten him, lost in their own conversation. But Gideon - and Alice - had let Fabian know ever since he was unwell as a child that they would never forget him. And while their overprotectiveness could drive Fabian up the wall on occasion, he loved them more than he could put into words.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Sirius Black didn't need James Potter. James was good fun - too trusting, too open and too spoiled for his own good, but a great bloke to hang around with. Smart, adventurous, loyal. Good. That did not mean that Sirius needed him.

Sirius hadn't needed his parents, and while Regulus could offer a point of sanity and refuge in Grimmauld Place, he certainly didn't need his brother. If Sirius didn't need his family, it had to follow that he didn't need friends.

Which is why Sirius had put James right when he suggested to miss the try-outs to keep him company. What in Merlin's name did James think was going to happen if he left Sirius alone for an hour?

James had been infuriating since the whole Snivellus curse episode, constantly wanting to make sure Sirius was okay. He was fine. Yes, his shoulder hurt like hell, but it wasn't something he couldn't handle. That had been the reason why he had pushed James out of the way to begin with. He had seen Snivellus raise his wand, aiming at James, and he had recognised that unmistakable look of someone casting a curse.

There was no way James had ever been on a receiving end of a curse, and Sirius sure as hell wasn't going to let his friend be cursed on his watch. It had been a simple - instinctive - decision to get James out of harms way.

Snivellus had also aimed at James' back, which in addition to being exactly the sort of cowardly thing Snivellus would do, had haunted Sirius slightly since. Sirius tried to move his shoulder as little as possible, due to the stabbing pains that shot through his arm if his shoulder shifted even slightly - on top of the constant pulsing aches that only Madam Pomfrey's potions could dull. If that had been James' back... Merlin. No, it was a good thing it was Sirius and Sirius' shoulder.

Plus, if it had been James he'd miss the try-outs. And somehow, the idea of James being disappointed didn't sit well with Sirius. Which was ridiculous - it was healthy for people to not always get what they wanted. But maybe that was the thing: James Potter was such refreshing example of someone who hadn't met with the real world, not much, and Sirius felt a need to keep James away from the hard realities of life for as long as he could.

Peter and Remus had also decided Sirius "needed" company. The only good thing that could be said about that affair was that the two had decided to split up to visit Sirius and support James. Peter, who liked Quidditch decided to watch James try out and Remus sat with Sirius.

Never in his life had Sirius been so grateful to Remus for not liking Quidditch. He thought the curse was punishment enough; he didn't need Peter trying to suck up to him every two minutes.

Remus made no fuss about the situation and for that, Sirius was immensely grateful. In fact, they both seemed to ignore where they were or why they were there, and instead chatted lightly about nothing in particular. Sometimes they strayed into how James might be doing and what they would do to cheer him up should he not make the team, or how they would celebrate if he did make it. The odds were not in his favour as a first year, but somehow, Sirius believed James was one for beating the odds.

Sirius realised he liked Remus. He'd always considered him kind and he had a sense of humour that sat well with Sirius, but the more Sirius saw of Remus, the more he found he enjoyed the boy's company. He wasn't James Potter, but he didn't need to be.

Remus dropped enough hints about Peter during their conversation that Sirius decided to try a bit harder with the boy. It just wasn't easy. He didn't like people sucking up to others. He didn't like it when Regulus did it to his parents and he didn't like it when Peter did it to him and James. But no, Peter had shown good taste and Regulus had not. Peter and Regulus were completely different. And that was true enough.

His resolve to be nice to Peter began to weaken the moment the boy raced in ahead of James and announced James hadn't made the team. He wanted to punch the boy - that was James news to share.

Sirius looked over Peter's shoulder to see the face of his friend - who he hadn't missed, of course not - but who he nevertheless felt surprisingly happy to see. He hoped James wasn't too disappointed about the outcome.

James rushed over to Sirius and took the seat nearest him before Peter could. James' hair was if possible messier than usual and he looked as happy as he always did after having been out on a broom. So, if James was disappointed about not making the team, he hid it well.

'How are you feeling?' James asked, anxiously.

'The same as when you asked me last time - and the time before that - and before that.'

'Well, you know me, I've got an appalling memory,' James grinned.

'No, you haven't,' Peter said, and Sirius laughed - and then stopped quickly as his shoulder protested painfully.

The boy was really thick.

Remus shot Sirius a warning glance, then he said: 'Madam Pomfrey reckons he'll be out by Sunday morning.'

'That's great - we can explore that passage way behind Gregory the Smarmy on Sunday,' James beamed.

Although Remus looked somewhat sceptical to the idea of potentially sneaking out of school, he agreed with little persuasion.

'So are you going to tell them?' Peter asked, looking at James.

Tell us what? Sirius wondered, looking at James. He hadn't actually made the team, had he? Could Peter have been bluffing earlier. Somehow, Sirius found this improbable.

'I'm a reserve,' James said.

'On the team,' Peter added. Sirius had got that much.

'That's brilliant, mate!' Sirius said, feeling happier than he had since he had landed in this miserable place.

'Congratuations,' Remus said, smiling benignly, and Sirius suspected Remus really had no idea what any of this meant. Sirius didn't worry though, James Potter would not allow Remus to be so blissfully ignorant about Quidditch for long.

'Who do you need me to hex to get you to play a match?' Sirius asked James later, trying to determine whether he was joking or not.

The others had left, Remus insisting Sirius needed rest. James had refused to leave, saying he'd leave when Madam Pomfrey threw him out and that he didn't mind just sitting quietly by Sirius' side. True to his word, James had taken up Quidditch Through the Ages, but after about half an hour, Sirius was bored of resting.

'Ideally Norman McClaggen. Won't help me play, but I think our chances of winning might be higher without him... He's the new seeker.'

'Gideon remains the second beater?' Sirius asked.

Sirius wasn't sure whether he'd ever want to play on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. He was not as passionate about it as James, nor did he think he could ever be as good as his friend. But if he was going to try-out in the future, it would be to play beater.

At larger family gatherings, when they had enough players to play normal Quidditch, Sirius always played beater. It gave him an enormous satisfaction being allowed to send Bludgers after his relations. He was surprised they let him.

Sending Bludgers at Slytherins could be something… and practice with James would be - maybe not fun - he suspected James took Quidditch too seriously for that, but at least more fun than sitting around in the common room without him.

James nodded. Fabian and Gideon remained the Gryffindor beaters.

So Sirius has two years to decide whether it was worth joining the team or not - and ask James for help to train if necessary. That suited Sirius just fine.

Not long after, Madam Pomfrey did indeed throw James out, and though Sirius was sorry to see the back of his friend, he fell asleep not long after.

The four boys did celebrate Sirius' release from the Hospital Wing with exploring the passageway behind Gregory the Smarmy.

The walk in the tunnel was probably the most entertaining aspect, speculating and trying to guess where the tunnel ended. The answer was a bit disappointing - it came out not far from Hogsmeade station, which, while clearly an improvement from them having no way to leave the castle, couldn't be the best way to get into Hogsmeade.

'The thing I don't get,' Peter said, looking across the black lake to the castle, 'is how we got here.'

'We used a secret tunnel,' Sirius said.

Peter scowled.

'That's not what I - we didn't go under the lake, did we?'

'No,' Remus said slowly, studying the lake too. 'That would have meant going far deeper underground, and yet we didn't walk around the lake, that would have taken us longer.'

'There's apparently a passageway between the second and fourth floor which requires no staircases whatsoever. This might be the same thing,' James said. 'Magic y'know - we might have crossed here any number of ways.'

'Why have staircases at all if we don't need them?' Sirius asked. 'Seems a waste.'

'I dunno,' James shrugged. 'Why live in at school if we can just floo over each morning?'

'Security concerns, maybe?' Sirius tried. Whatever the reason, Sirius was beyond thankful he didn't need to go home every evening.

'There are lots of security measures in and around Hogwarts,' Remus agreed.

'But,' Remus added, thoughtfully, 'they could limit the floo network to the school only and we could floo directly to each classroom.'

'Why don't we?' Peter asked.

'For the same reason we don't have stair-free passages to each classroom? For no good reason whatsoever,' Sirius said.

He'd wanted to say "so that your lazy backside gets some exercise".

Had Peter been anything like James, it would have been exactly the sort of comment he'd make. But he'd decided to listen to Remus about being a bit nicer to Peter. Though at some point he'd have to teach Peter that banter was only good fun. Otherwise he'd go mental talking to the boy.

'I think it's "to prepare us for real life",' James said, 'y'know, you have people who are too busy following the designated ways, and will spend forever walking to and from all the classrooms, and then you've got us, who will find all the quickest routes. And that's how you win at life.'

'I thought you wanted to be fitter than everyone by walking all the stairs you could find?' Sirius asked James, raising an eyebrow.

'Yeah,' James agreed, 'but I also want to be the fastest. You're not going to say no to a great racing broom just because you're good at flying, are you?'

'And here, secret passageways are the racing brooms?' Sirius asked.

'Exactly,' James grinned. 'And you want the best broom, don't you?'

They went back shortly after having agreed that finding every secret passageway in the school was indeed a worthy goal of the group.

The group - the four of them were a group now - Sirius didn't quite know when that had happened. But he realised he didn't object to the idea too much. Peter and James were discussing eagerly how to get back at Snivellus, and while James had the best ideas, Peter was not completely without his own. And better still, Remus talked to Sirius about what it was like to grow up in a primarily non-magic household. Sirius soaked in the knowledge hungrily, hoping to learn something that he could use to annoy his family. Yeah, as far as groups went, this one had its merits.

The following week brought plenty of opportunities for James to do his "testing" thing as teachers were starting to give them homework in earnest. It seemed to Sirius that the longer it had taken for a professor to give them any homework, the more likely they were to be lenient with James. Finally, his friend was really getting somewhere.

Professor Sprout, that Monday, was possibly the professor with the least interesting response that week, suggesting that James instead handed in the homework on Wednesday. She did not give him an opportunity to perform, noting it would take away precious time from the other students. But she did not taking any points from Gryffindor either.

'Next time, Potter, just tell me in advance.'

'If so, professor, I should let you know that Sirius and I are in detention all week and it's quite challenging, getting our head around the school work when we spend every evening with Filch. Could I hand it in next Monday?'

Sirius wasn't sure if James pushed it a bit far, asking for extra time on an already delayed bit of homework because of detentions James had got into. He'd half-expected professor Sprout to tell James that was his own fault. If it had been anyone else asking, Sirius would have been sure that this would have been the professor's reply. But James had a way of getting what he wanted.

Indeed, professor Sprout did give James a further extension on the homework - the homework which Sirius knew James had pretty much already done with Sirius the previous evening.

Professor Stjerna and professor Slughorn ended up giving James points for his performance when he recited his allegedly not completed homework. He earned 5 from the astronomy professor and a whole 15 from the potions master, who told James he had inherited his mother's brain as well as his father's potion talent.

James was particularly pleased in that lesson, throwing Snivellus a deadly look. Sirius had known, of course, that James had been angry about what had happened between Sirius and Snivellus. Merlin, Sirius was furious too. However, the loathing written on James' face was entirely unfamiliar to Sirius, who otherwise felt he knew James quite well by now. It was hard not to feel a world of affection for his messy-haired friend, who seemed to take it upon his shoulders to make sure that anyone who hurt Sirius would be severely punished. Not that Sirius needed James to do that, but the sentiment was nice.

It pleased James - and Sirius - to see that now the students were working on individual potions, professor Slughorn focused most of his attention on Lily Evans, not Snivellus, though Sirius could hardly tell their potions apart. It seemed James had been right about old Sluggy: he was a decent guy. Decent enough to know to avoid a slimy, evil, oddball like Snivellus at any rate. One couldn't expect a lot more from Slytherins.

As for punishing Snivellus, Sirius and James spent every moment they weren't in lessons or detentions that week in the library, followed by an eager, if not entirely helpful, Peter Pettigrew. It seemed James had been right, it was just the place to look up simple spells and hexes.

They made a list of various spells and agreed to find empty classrooms over the weekend to practice. Remus agreed to join, when they gave him an update in the common room Thursday evening, though he made it clear he would not be using any spells on Snivellus or any other student. To him, it was an academic exercise. Sirius and James could forgive this, as long as Remus didn't plan to turn them in for not following his moral code, but Remus didn't seem the snitching type.

James had also written home to his father, asking for simple duelling spells. What Fleamont Potter believed his son would do with the information, Sirius didn't know. He had tried to warn James that his father probably wouldn't want to help, but James had just looked at him incredulously and said: 'you don't know dad. He's all for us learning how to defend ourselves. He'd be disappointed if I wasn't caught duelling in a hallway once before the year was over.'

That Friday, Duchess, James' beloved family owl, came with not only a long list of spells for Sirius, James and the others, but also two small potions bottles.

'Brilliant!' James said and pocketed the two potions.

'What's that?' Peter asked. Remus looked like he didn't want to know.

'Nothing,' James said, throwing Sirius a meaningful (and bloody obvious) look.

That evening, the two of them congregated in James' bed, as soon as they heard the tell tale signs of Peter and Remus being fast asleep.

'I know I was meant to tell you about this ages ago,' James said, pulling out the bottles 'but I forgot. It's about getting back at your cousin.'

'Go on,' Sirius said, with interest.

'So, my dad invented this potion. No one knows about it - I don't even think mum knows really - he only invented it to get me to eat vegetables. We mix this bottle here,' James held out the bottle with a clear-looking liquid in it, 'with any flavour - my dad would mix it with chocolate - and then everything the drinker of the potion consumes for the next 24 hours tastes of that flavour.'

'And I presume it doesn't have to be a good flavour?'

'Exactly,' James agreed eagerly, 'we could mix it with - I don't know - a bit of a slug or a rotten doxy egg - and have your cousin drink it.'

'Why not use this on Snivellus?' Sirius asked, enjoying the mental image of Snivellus wretching in disgust at eating things that tasted like troll bogey.

'Too kind. Besides, I want to see Snivellus' face when he learns exactly who and what hit him.'

James looked so unlike himself when he spoke of Snivellus. There was absolutely no mercy in his tone. Good, Sirius thought.

'We need to find out what taste we want, mix it in, leave it for 12 hours and then we can administer it in her pumpkin juice or something,' James said. 'I think you better decide the flavour.'

'What's the second bottle?' Sirius asked, while his mind was racing to think about what gruesome taste should haunt his cousin for a day.

James grinned: 'an antidote. Dad takes his potions seriously. He wants to make sure we have it in case something goes wrong.'

'He doesn't know what we're planning to do, I hope,' Sirius said, realising he had no idea what James might have told his father.

'Nah, but we like to operate on a need-to-know basis, when it comes to stuff like this. "Plausible deniability", he likes to call it, in case mum catches me - or hears about it.'

'One day, I want to meet this Fleamont Potter.'

'Any time!' James said happily, 'Come over during the Christmas break, if you want?'

Christmas break - yeah that was right, Sirius thought defeatedly. His dear mother had 'requested' that he came home, and as much as Sirius wanted to disobey her, he wasn't foolish enough to cross her on this. It was bad enough what was awaiting him at home now that he'd shown his true colours - red and gold. Bloody hell, how could they ever have doubted he'd not end up in Slytherin? He hated them, the whole lot of them. The family, the obsession with blood purity and the houses - Grimmauld Place and the one they had wanted him to be in at school.

Seeing James and his family over the holidays would be exactly the sort of thing that would make up for the horrors at home, but as much as Walburga Black complained about having Sirius around, she would deny him anything that would give him pleasure. Come to that, she would deny him seeing the Potters even if he had hated it; given his family's view on the Potters.

The Potters, the Prewetts and the Weasleys were so despised in the Black household that Sirius had long since made a mental note that if he could, he'd befriend every single Potter, Prewett and Weasley. It was strange thinking about it now, now when he knew James Potter, that James' first attraction to Sirius had been his last name.

As James had seemed to take a liking to Sirius, Sirius had tried to hide his last name for as long as he could - until the sorting. He had been sure James would want nothing to do with him once he knew who he was, convinced as he was that the Potters had to hate the Blacks as much as the Blacks hated them. But no, James hadn't even known to be wary of the name, and James' mother had even told him to look after Sirius.

'Can't, mate,' Sirius said, gloomily.

'Why not?' James looked confused.

'You're blood traitors, remember?' Sirius said. It was the easiest truth, and the only one Sirius dared own up to.

'I keep forgetting what a disappointment we are to the wizarding elite,' James said, smiling weakly.

Sirius could tell James wanted to talk more about it - about why Sirius had wanted to stay at Hogwarts over the break; and why Sirius couldn't see James when he was home. But Sirius was not about to tell James anything more about how worried he was for Christmas. Some things you dealt with alone.

'So,' Sirius said quickly to head off any further discussion, 'flavours… I've heard aunt Druella, Cissy's mother, describe me as a rotten apple once.'

'Well then,' James said, 'rotten apples do spoil the bunch.'

'So I've heard,' Sirius agreed. 'Where can we get one?'

'I can sort that,' James offered. 'That's the easy part… The challenging part is finding a way to get the potion into her juice without her noticing.'

'Oh, that's easy,' Sirius said thinking of the antidote. 'It's not the first time I've poisoned family members.'

Sirius grinned at his friend: 'To be honest, I think it comes with the territory of being a Black.'

'Your family -' James started.

'We've been through this already - yes, they are amongst the foulest creatures who roam this world.'

'Like dementors?'

'Oh, I wouldn't be surprised if there was dementor blood in our veins. It would explain a lot.'

'On your mother's or father's side?' James teased.

'They're cousins - so both.'

'Cousins you say…' James grinned, 'well, that explains you.'

'100% messed up inbreed,' Sirius agreed. 'So let me tell you how we're going to poison my cousin.'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Hello Cissy,' Sirius said as he sat down next to his cousin. The girl who had previously sat next to Cissy was now busy cleaning her robes, having moved further down the table, glaring angrily at Sirius.

'What do you want, Sirius?'

'Sorry, didn't mean to spill pumpkin juice all over the place,' Sirius said.

James leaned in-between Sirius and his haughty cousin to grab Cissy's goblet.

'I love a bit of pumpkin juice, I do,' James said after having taken the goblet to his lips: 'Pay up, Sirius, this tastes exactly the same as ours.'

'Are you sure? I wouldn't put it past these snakes to be drinking blood.'

'No blood,' James confirmed. 'Thanks.'

James tried to hand the goblet back to a furious Cissy.

'Mate, that's disgusting. She doesn't want to drink from that now you've soiled it with your "unworthy" lips. Here Cissy,' Sirius said and snatched up a goblet from the empty seat across from him.

James shrugged and put down the goblet.

'Yup, this is clean,' Sirius said and poured some pumpkin juice into the glass.

'5 points from Gryffindor,' Cissy said stiffly, refusing to take the goblet from Sirius' hands.

'What for?' James asked.

'For being insufferable,' Cissy hissed.

'Ah, so we do have something in common,' Sirius grinned at his cousin.

James reached out for the goblet he had tried earlier - the one that had belonged to Cissy: 'mind if I take this back to the Gryffindor table? Sirius is not the only one to believe you guys actually drink blood.'

But Cissy was quicker and grabbed her old goblet. She wiped the rim with her napkin: 'If you're not out of my eyesight in the next minute, I'll take 20 points off you - each.'

'What's going on?' asked a familiar, drawling voice. Oh joy, Sirius thought.

'Oh hey, Lucifer,' Sirius said with false cheerfulness.

He'd found the name in a muggle book in a public library in London and thought it apt to describe the blonde man in front of him.

'Sirius, to what do we owe the pleasure?' Lucius Malfoy asked.

'Trust me, the only pleasure to be found is the thought that it's taken me three whole weeks to run into you.'

'That particular pleasure is a shared one.'

'Good - let's up the ambition, shall we? Let's aim for three months. Or even better, three lifetimes. See you around, cuz,' Sirius waved to Cissy, and James and Sirius left the two of them.

'How in Godrick's name did you know she'd drink of the goblet I drank of?' James asked in awe as Sirius could confirm that Cissy had, in fact, taken a sip of her old - and now poisoned - goblet.

'Because she knew it to be safe before we came, she saw both your hands the entire time and, most importantly, because I suggested she shouldn't.'

James looked impressed. It was a sad skill to have, knowing how to poison one's relations, but a useful one.

The first thing James did when he got to the Gryffindor table was to fish out the bottle with the antidote, rinse his mouth with it and swallow. James retched.

'You okay?' Sirius asked.

'Ye-ah, ugh… unfortunately the antidote now tastes of rotten apples,' James said grimacing. 'It should be fine in a minute. I didn't drink the potion, so it'll clear out in no time.'

James had carried the poison in his mouth from the moment they entered the Great Hall, spitting it out in the goblet, pretending to take a sip, right under Cissy's ugly, pale, Slytherin nose. Of course, James had never drunk as much as a drop from her goblet. It still could be blood hexed to look like pumpkin juice for all Sirius and James knew.

Sirius avoided helping himself to any breakfast items out of solidarity until the slightly greenish tint in James face had disappeared. This promised very well for the prank.

'So when will it take effect for Cissy?' Sirius asked curiously, realising he hadn't asked this before, and finally able to help himself to some toast and beans.

'Mixed out in the juice like that, about thirty minutes,' James said, seeming to only now consider the matter himself. 'Well that's good, isn't it,' he added, 'she might not notice until lunch.'

'She'll have a terrible day today,' Sirius grinned.

'And morning tomorrow,' James added. He eyed the porridge warily.

'The antidote has worked hasn't it?' Sirius asked.

'Mhm,' James agreed without much conviction. 'Just try telling my appetite that.'

Just then, Peter and Remus joined them, and James and Sirius decided to change the topic.

It was Wednesday, September 22. The four boys had spent the weekend practicing hexes and James had found a way for Sirius and James to sneak into the kitchen, so as to procure a rotten apple. It had taken the house elf Lulu a few days to get the desired rotten state that James and Sirius felt necessary for the prank to succeed. Lulu had been confused about the request, but like all house elves (except Kreacher), her primary concern had been to please.

When they found the kitchen, Sirius and James naturally also celebrated this discovery by bringing as many cakes and sweets as they could carry up to their dormitory for an evening feast with Remus and Peter. Peter had been very impressed, and once Remus had been reassured that the boys had in fact been given the food by a herd of eager house-elves, he was just as eager as Peter to join in the celebrations.

All in all, it had been a good few days.

'First Quidditch practice today,' James said.

'Oh, don't we know it,' Sirius said.

Not only had James talked about it endlessly, it also turned out that when James was nervous, the git tidied stuff - like Sirius' own bloody robes. It was disconcerting, finding the robes he had left on the floor hung up instead. It had taken Sirius much longer to find them than if James had just left them alone, like a normal person.

'You'll do brilliantly!' Peter said.

'We'll come and watch if you want,' Remus offered.

'It's just practice,' James said. 'It's better if you guys try to learn the disarming spell. Dad always says that the best opponent is a disarmed opponent.'

James had first suggested to Sirius and the others yesterday that they should practice expelliarmus when he was at practice as he already knew it ('it was the first spell dad taught me when I got my wand.')

Sirius glanced over at the Slytherin table. He knew it was too early for the potion to take effect, yet he couldn't help look for signs of changes in Cissy as she talked to Lucius.

'Who is that?' James asked, having followed Sirius glance. 'I take it Lucifer isn't is real name?'

'Might as well have been,' Sirius grumbled. 'Lucius Malfoy is his name.'

'I feel like I have heard the name Malfoy,' James said, thoughtfully, 'yes… is he related to Abraxas Malfoy?'

'That's his father,' Sirius said, thinking about (and enjoying the thought of) how insulted his own mother would be if she learned that there were pureblood wizards who knew of the Malfoy name but not the Blacks.

'I thought he might have been your cousin too.'

'I'm sure he is, one way or another. All pureblood families are related, and he spends more than enough time with the Blacks.'

'If all pureblood wizards are related, does that mean we're related?' James asked.

'Have to be,' Sirius shrugged.

'Well, that's something,' James beamed. Sirius didn't see the big deal. Blood meant very little to him - as a mark of family as well as "purity".

'You were almost right though,' Sirius observed. 'If aunt Druella gets it her way, Lucius will be my cousin-in-law, if such a thing exists.'

'You mean she wants Malfoy to marry Narcissa?'

Sirius hadn't considered that.

'Possibly, but I think she'd preferred it if Lucius married Cissy's older sister, Andromeda. I think aunty hopes he can be a positive influence over her.'

That would be a lost cause. If Andy couldn't be influenced by her sisters nor her time in Slytherin, then it hardly stood to reason that one man could change her. Especially someone like Lucius Malfoy, whom Andromeda made a point out of avoiding when she could, and made snide remarks at for her own, and for Sirius' and Regulus', amusement.

'She needs positive influence, does she?'

'Oh yeah, she made the mistake of befriending the wrong sorts of people at Hogwarts. She left last year or I'd introduce you. She's good fun.'

'But she must have been in Slytherin? You said your whole family have been Slytherins.'

'Oh she was sorted into Slytherin alright, but it went downhill from there. I doubt the house did her much good, but by her fourth year her best friend was a Ravenclaw - or Gryffindor - I think, and she got a muggle-born friend of sorts in Hufflepuff a little after that. She's a bit like that Evans girl - except the other way around - Evans should really have been in Slytherin.'

James nodded at this.

Now that Sirius thought about it, it was Andy who first gave him the idea that he didn't have to be in Slytherin. She had been careful not to push him any one way (probably having felt the effects of having been pressured into the wrong house), but she had always hinted at the possibility for Sirius to go where he wanted to. To be who he wanted to be.

'You think Andromeda will marry that Malfoy git?' James asked.

'Not a chance,' Sirius said with a certain amount of pride as he thought of his favourite cousin. But Andy was still a Black. 'At least, I hope not,' he added.

After about ten more minutes, Sirius smirked: 'you got your calculations wrong. It's only been 20 minutes.'

Narcissa Malfoy had pushed away the remainder of her food, looking greener than James had done. Brilliant!

'Twenty minutes is round about thirty minutes,' James said defensively, then he brightened as he quickly glanced over: 'She looks disgusted!'

'So normal, in other words,' Sirius said.

Both ignored the questioning looks from their friends, who, while not having listened intently to their conversation, had nevertheless picked up that something was going on.

'SIRIUS BLACK!' Cissy shouted as she approached the Gryffindor table at lunch.

She was white faced, nostrils flaring and eyes blazing with fury.

'YOU DID THIS! YOU AND YOUR LITTLE BLOOD TRAITOR FRIEND.'

'A little louder, please. I'm not sure all the professors can hear you,' Sirius smirked at his cousin.

He felt his smile falter a moment later as Cissy pulled her wand on James, who was nearest to her (thus allowing the wand to be reasonably well hidden from afar while leaving no doubt that it would hit its aim).

Surely, she wouldn't be that stupid. There was a table full of teachers.

'Do it,' James said defiantly, clearly having arrived at the same conclusion.

'Go on,' Sirius hissed, praying very much indeed that she wouldn't, 'it's only your prefect badge.'

'Narcissa, what in Merlin's name is go- is that your wand?'

It was the Head Boy Frank Longbottom.

'Put that away now and tell me what's going on,' he continued in a forced calm manner.

When Narcissa didn't move, Longbottom continued a little more insistently: 'It's me or McGonagall.'

Professor McGonagall was indeed making her way down towards the commotion.

'Come now,' Longbottom said. 'We're friends.'

Cissy wrinkled her nose at the suggestion that they were friends, and even Longbottom seemed to wonder at his choice of wording, but it worked. Narcissa put her wand away. Longbottom nodded quickly to McGonagall, who stopped, and though her eyes didn't leave the group, she seemed fine with letting the Head Boy handle the situation.

'I'll speak to you four later,' Longbottom said to the four Gryffindor boys, before he led Cissy out of the Great Hall, suggesting to her they talked somewhere in private.

'We didn't do anything!' Peter complained.

'Neither did we,' Sirius said, trying to deliver his threat effectively, and yet not giving the boy an inch to go on so that he could rat them out to Longbottom. 'And you better remember that.'

'No one is getting in trouble except Narcissa,' James said, doing a better job at looking innocently confused at the whole affair than he had been able to demonstrate so far in other situations. Sirius was pleased James was learning.

'Mate,' James turned to Sirius, 'you failed to mention that your cousin is off her rocker. What on earth was that about?'

But as soon as Remus and Peter looked away, James grinned widely. The two high-fived each other discreetly under the table.

'Come on,' Sirius said a little later. 'We mustn't be late for your dear Madame Maxwell.'

'Shut up "oh so fine, oh so handsome, oh so well-spoken Master Sirius, Sir",' James said in a plausible imitation of the house-elf Lulu.

'All house-elves are like that,' Sirius said defensively.

'Yeah… no, Lulu definitely think you're the finest master she's laid her great big eyes on.'

'What's this?' Peter asked with interest.

'One of the house-elves in the kitchen has a crush on Sirius,' James grinned. Sirius kicked James under the table, but not hard.

'Madame Maxwell, James. Don't let her wait,' Sirius said.

'How was practice?' Sirius asked, eagerly putting away his History of Magic homework as he saw his friend and the rest of the Quidditch team enter the portrait hole.

James nodded towards the stairs to the dormitories, and Sirius took the hint, leaving Peter and Remus to their own homework.

'So, how was it?' Sirius asked as he sat down at the edge of his own bed.

James grimaced: 'well, I'm not the worst.'

'And that's a bad thing?' Sirius asked.

'Yes it is! I'm the reserve! Going off that you'd hope I'd be the worst!'

'So why are you the reserve?'

'Because I'm the worst chaser,' James said miserably.

'How many of the players do you think you're better than?' Sirius asked curiously.

James could come across as arrogant and with an inflated sense of self. Particularly in public settings, Sirius could see some truth in that, but Sirius believed all this came from James' confidence that the world was his for the taking - not a misjudgement of his own skills and talents. The only area Sirius had seen James be directly wrong was in his own assessment of his ability (or lack there of) to act normal around their Defence Against the Dark Arts professor. Sirius was curious, therefore, to know what James thought of the team, and resolved to believe his friend.

No big leap of faith was required however: 'just that berk Norman McClaggen,' James sighed. Yeah, that was right, Sirius had forgotten James had said something about this already.

'He's the seeker?' Sirius asked.

'Yes,' James looked miserable: 'which is really not the position to have a weak player.'

'It makes the chasers job more important,' Sirius tried, but he agreed with James. This did not promise well for Gryffindor.

James started to get undressed, which was a fair response, Sirius thought.

'You've not considered playing seeker, have you?' Sirius asked.

'I'd be a terrible seeker,' James said, wrestling with his robes. 'Though Merlin knows if I could be any worse than that McLaggen. How did disarming go?' James asked.

'Oh easy,' Sirius said, although he knew neither Remus nor Peter had yet got the hang of it. Though Sirius' wand had twitched towards the end when Remus tried to disarm him.

'Well the hard part isn't really the spell,' James agreed as he went to his dresser to get a towel.

'You know, James, I really wish you'd learn to find the towels before you get undressed,' Sirius teased.

James responded by wriggling his bare arse at his friend.

'Anyways,' James continued, now thankfully having found his towel, 'the hard part is to aim and also to make sure the opponent doesn't block you.'

'Do you know how to block spells?'

'No, not yet. D'you?'

'No,' Sirius admitted. 'Let's add that to the list.'

'How did Peter and Remus go?' James asked.

'Remus will get it soon, I think, but as I've yet to see Peter master a single spell even in class…'

'Pete's not bad,' James said quickly, 'he just needs a bit of confidence. We can help. Still…'

James seemed to hesitate.

'I was thinking about our list,' he said finally, 'I wonder whether we split it into two parts. I think... maybe some of the spells... it might make sense if it's just you and me working on them...'

Sirius agreed.

'We can teach them to the others later,' James said quickly, 'I just think there might be enough for them to be getting on with.'

Just then they heard Peter call their names up the stairs.

Sirius went to investigate while James went in the shower. Downstairs was Frank Longbottom and the two boys, none of them looking particularly happy about the situation.

Nice work, Jim, Sirius thought as he prepared for battle, knowing of course that his friend had no idea that he had just dodged a Bludger.

In the end, Frank Longbottom couldn't do much on the grounds of having no evidence. He gave the three of them a warning (requesting it also to be passed on to James) and let them go.

Seeing Cissy the following day made Sirius convinced that the best part of the prank had been to get away with it when she knew they had done it, and she knew Frank Longbottom knew they had done it. But unable to prove anything, all she could do was to send them a deadly look.

Somehow the weekend came and went and suddenly it was Sunday evening. James and Sirius were playing wizard chess on the floor between their beds, trying to savour the last school-free hours of the week.

It had been a reasonably fun weekend. James and Sirius had spent some of the weekend practicing spells with Peter and Remus, some of it practicing other spells and the four of them had explored some of the outskirts of Hogsmeade. Remus refused to go into the village centre, worried about being caught and had convinced Peter to be equally afraid of the idea. James and Sirius were less bothered about getting caught, but they had decided not to go into the centre before a Hogsmeade weekend when they could blend in with the other, older, students.

'I noticed you didn't do your usual homework trick with Madame Maxwell,' Sirius observed half-way through the game.

He hoped the topic of Madame Maxwell might throw James off balance in the game, which he had played unusually well. Sirius still won most of their regular games, but James could put up a decent fight - and he certainly was now. It wasn't cheating, bringing her up. At war you had to be prepared for anything.

'She's new and all,' James said, shrugging but looking a little uncomfortable.

'Very gentleman-like,' Sirius grinned, 'oh go on!' He shouted encouragingly at his chess pieces.

'I'm glad you're not in Slytherin,' James said a little later, catching Sirius by surprise.

'Me too, mate,' Sirius agreed.

'I like you,' James continued.

Sirius wasn't sure if James was deploying a similar tactic of trying to distract him from the game (now that Sirius had the upper hand). If so, he'd chosen his topic remarkably well.

'I like you too,' Sirius said, 'but if you want more than that, I'd say focus on Madame Maxwell - or someone your own age, Maeve - or Mary...'

Sirius regretted bringing up Maeve Ryan. Ever since the Quidditch try-outs she'd been angry with James. She'd insisted he should have told her that he would ask to be a reserve so they could have asked together, and she kept ignoring James' comments that she could still ask Fabian Prewett.

Girls… Sirius thought most were just a waste of space, really.

'I mean,' James pushed on, ignoring Sirius' comment 'I really couldn't imagine Hogwarts without you.'

Sirius didn't know what to say to that. He might know more than his fair share of poisoning relations, but this was unfamiliar territory.

In the space of less than a month, Sirius had come to view James with more affection than he had felt for anyone, even Regulus. Of course, Sirius couldn't imagine Hogwarts without James. It would be like imagining Hogwarts without the castle.

'You're not bad yourself,' Sirius said.

He had meant to say more.

'I know,' James grinned, and Sirius got the sense - or rather he hoped - that James' comment encompassed more than just knowing he wasn't too bad.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

The other boys couldn’t quite believe it when they realised they had been at Hogwarts for a month. Remus had no trouble believing it, as his body once again started to ache. The second full moon was soon going to be upon him. He wasn’t ready, not in the slightest, but when had that ever mattered.

Remus knew he was lucky with the timing of the second full moon, just as he’d been lucky with the first. While the second full moon wasn’t exactly on the weekend, it was on Sunday night to Monday morning. Having no classes the two days that led up to the full moon was helpful as he was still settling down to his new life as a student. And yet, this time he would certainly miss classes. If it was a good month, he might be back by Tuesday, but Remus could already tell it was not going to be a good month.

Remus spent most of the weekend in bed. He remembered Madam Pomfrey’s promise of potions that could help alleviate some of the symptoms, but Remus had no energy to go and ask for any. He should have thought ahead, of course, but maybe - after all - he too had been caught in the delight at being at school enough to forget to manage his condition. Maybe he had started to believe his own lies, that he was just like the others, that there was nothing for him to worry about other than homework and pretty Defence Against the Dark Arts professors.

On Saturday, the boys seemed happy to leave Remus be once they had checked that he was, in fact, not dead. Peter took up some food for Remus around tea time, realising Remus had not gone down for any meals that day, but that was the extent Remus interacted with any of them.

The trouble began on Sunday when James and Sirius too became worried about Remus. James wanted to fetch professor McGonagall or Madam Pomfrey while Sirius was convinced they could help Remus on their own. Remus wished they could just leave him be again.

After insisting that all he needed was rest, James decided to go flying, inviting the two others but both declined due to the awful weather outside. What Peter and Sirius did to entertain themselves without either Remus or James was something Remus couldn’t quite picture, but they seemed cheerful enough when they returned with a soaking wet James a few hours later.

‘We can bring some food from the kitchen, if you’d like?’ Peter asked as the three boys prepared to leave for lunch.

James had showered, presumably to get some heat into his body; he couldn’t exactly have gotten any wetter.

‘Anything you like,’ James added. ‘I’m sure Lulu would be most obliging to help any friend of Master Sirius, Sir.’

‘James is a prat,’ Sirius said after having punched James in the stomach, ‘but he’s right. We can bring pretty much any food you could dream of.’

‘Or just tea?’ Peter suggested.

‘I’m alright,’ Remus said, hearing how not-alright he sounded. But he intended to leave for the Hospital Wing as soon as he was sure the boys were at lunch.

Sirius hesitated, then said: ‘look, I’m the last person to want to suggest this, but we could take you to that horrible place?’

Sirius' mind had gone to the same place Remus' had: The Hospital Wing. 

After Sirius had been released he had been quite vocal about how bored he had been there. While he’d been unhappy about it at the time, Remus also suspected his view of the place had changed after his recovery. At the start, Sirius had been too unwell to be really bored.

‘Yes, it’s no problem to us,’ James added, having caught his breath again after Sirius' punch, then repeating the offer from earlier: ‘Or we could fetch Madam Pomfrey here if that’s easier?’

‘I might go down if I’m no better later,’ Remus said, desperately wanting the conversation to be over.

He wasn’t sure why he wouldn’t just let them walk him down to the Hospital Wing, when that was where he was intending to go. It wasn’t as if Madam Pomfrey would greet him with ‘are you here for your monthly werewolf transformation?’ But the more his friends wanted to help him now, not knowing what was wrong with him, the more it hurt to think about what they would say if they ever found out.

The boys eventually left, Peter promising to bring some food and tea, and Remus left about half an hour later, feeling a little guilty.

It was only when Remus realised he must have taken a wrong turn or the stairs must have led him somewhere new that he recognised his mistake. True, thanks to Sirius’ stint in the Hospital Wing, and even James’ short visit in their first week, he had walked to the Hospital Wing from the Gryffindor Tower more times than he would have expected by now, but it still required work to find the way. Work required effort; and Remus had no energy to think or pay attention. He was lost.

He startled at a sudden bang ahead and turning the corner he found a girl, likely in her 6th or 7th year, with dirty blonde hair that looked like it had just been on fire. But that couldn’t be right, could it? Yet, the evidence was there before him: her hair was wet, singed at the edges and there was a burnt smell in the corridor. 

‘Sorry,’ she said, her voice gentle and nothing like anything he’d picture of someone who had just needed to put out a fire. Especially considering it had been her own hair that had been burning.

‘I didn’t mean to frighten you,’ the girl had silvery eyes which were slightly wide, and Remus worried she might be in shock.

‘Are you alright?’ Remus managed to ask. He wished more than ever that he could have just accepted the offer from Sirius, James and Peter to take him down to the Hospital Wing.

'I am fine,’ she said. ‘A little disappointed,’ she added, ‘but fine.’

Remus nodded. Intending to leave her he just said: ‘alright, well, I better be going.’

‘Do you know where you’re going?’ the girl asked, ‘you look a little lost.’

Remus debated whether to be honest with the girl, but he could need the help.

‘The Hospital Wing. You don't happen to know how I can get there from - erm - wherever we are now?’

‘Hm,’ the girl said thoughtfully, and Remus’ heart fell. 

Despite his question he had been sure she must know the way, seeing as she was much older than him. She couldn’t possibly not know? But then again, most people didn’t visit the Hospital Wing several times a month to see friends or to hide a dark secret.

Maybe, he hoped, she was thinking of the shortest route.

‘I suppose most people who are lost in this castle know where they are going, just not where they are, which is so very different from life, where most people know where they are, but not where they are going.’

Remus realised he would have dearly liked to run into this girl at any other time of the month. Surely she was a Ravenclaw, she was curious, reflective and different (but not, secretly-a-monster different). It made sense. As far as Remus knew the Ravenclaws were located at the west side of the castle. Maybe he wasn't as far away from the Hospital Wing as he had feared?

‘Or maybe,’ she continued, ‘maybe it’s the same in real life: people think they know where they are. They think they are lost because they don’t know where they are going, but in reality they have lost their way and that’s why they can’t find the next right step?’

Today is not the day for this, Remus thought desperately.

‘Right now, I’m afraid I don’t know where I am and I’d like to go to the Hospital Wing,’ Remus said, trying to hide all traces of impatience.

His father had drilled into him that nothing was worse than a temper one cannot control, and while Remus typically considered himself quite patient, he felt the strain of the approaching full moon wear down even his patience.

‘Oh yes,’ she smiled, ‘I’m not good at giving directions, but I can take you down. I am Pandora Beavin by the way.’

She waved her wand, causing her hair to dry. Another wave of her wand, and it was in a bun that mostly hid the burnt edges. 

‘Remus Lupin,’ Remus said as they started walking.

‘Oh, you must be Lyall Lupin’s son!'

‘You know him?’ Remus asked, surprised. Usually it was Sirius’ family people tended to know, or Fleamont Potter.

‘I know of him, of course,' Beavin said happily: ‘he’s a world-leading expert on Non-Human Spirituous Apparitions. Boggarts are fascinating, don’t you think? I wonder what they look like when no one can see them. Does your father have any theories?

When Remus made no reply, the walking demanding all his concentration, she shook her head slightly: ‘I’m sorry, Remus, you’re unwell, that’s why you’re going to the Hospital Wing. Don’t worry, I’ll get you there safely.’

And, to Remus’ relief, in silence.

Beavin said goodbye right outside the Hospital Wing, saying she did not want to impose. But to Remus' surprise, she stroked his chin as she wished him a speedy recovery. It was a maternal gesture. While not overly fond of strangers touching him, Remus found that he liked it.

Remus thanked the girl, and she departed.

When he woke up in the Hospital Wing a few hours later, Remus wondered whether the girl had been a fevered dream. But then, it had been an odd thing to make up.

‘Your friends were here to see you,’ the matron said, dragging him back to reality.

‘What did you tell them?’ Remus asked fearfully, realising he had not left a note. This month he was really slipping up, and it was only the second full moon. 

‘That you were too unwell for visitors.’

‘And they accepted that?’ Remus asked before he could help himself.

The matron raised an eyebrow. Right, Madam Pomfrey could be quite frightful if she wanted to.

‘Are you ready?’

No, Remus thought. Definitely not, and I never will be.

He nodded.

‘It will pass, Lupin, and I’ll be there to collect you as soon as it does,’ Madam Pomfrey said not too unkindly.

Remus had been right. It wasn’t a good month.

After his transformation and until Madam Pomfrey arrived, Remus had been sure he’d die from the blood loss. He had desperately tried to stem the worst of the bleeding, but there was only so much he could do with a bit of fabric from the bed and being unable to move much. He found himself crying when he saw the matron emerge in the doorway, and while the pain was bad, the tears were mostly of relief. He didn’t want to die. Not like that.

Madam Pomfrey could heal most of his wounds (and replenish the blood he had lost) before she got him back to the Hospital Wing, but this did little to remove the aches that the still strong pull from the moon was causing him, nor could it make his body forget the trauma it had undergone.

Monday was just a big fevery blur to Remus. He was vaguely aware that he was in the Hospital Wing, and though he realised much later that he must have continued to cry, he could not remember any of it.

It was only late in the evening that he was conscious enough to notice that there was a man sitting next to his bed.

‘D-dad?’

‘Remus, my boy, how are you feeling?’ Lyall Lupin looked tired and relieved.

‘I’m … what are you doing here?’ Remus had been about to say that he was okay, but he was far from okay. Instead he needed to know why his father was here.

'Poppy - that is Madam Pomfrey - contacted us and suggested that you might need a bit of company. I take it the wolf wasn't particularly well-behaved this month?'

The wolf. Lyall, like Hope, wanted so badly to pretend it wasn't Remus. But it was Remus. Remus hurt Remus. Yet, this time, Remus was overcome with relief to have someone who knew his secret, so he accepted the terminology without any argument. 

'It wasn't,' he said simply. What more was there to say? Describing the pain - or how scared Remus had been - would only hurt Lyall too. 

Lyall reached out and squeezed Remus' hand, which was resting on top of his bedcovers.

'I am sorry I can't-,' Lyall stopped, drawing a steadying breath. Remus looked straight ahead. He hated seeing his father so torn up. 

'I am sorry I can't protect you from it, Remus, but everything else, you don't have to do alone. I am here, your mother is here, Poppy is here. I know it's not enough -'

'Dad, stop, please!'

Remus couldn't take his father's self-loathing, like it was his fault that Remus was the way he was. 

'It's enough,' Remus said, squeezing his father's hand back. 'You being here is enough. Just don't -'

'Don't make you worry about me,' Lyall smiled sadly. 'You'd think I got the bedside conversations sorted by now.'

'Don't worry,' Remus said, smiling back, 'we've still got plenty of years to practice.'

Lyall laughed, but it quickly turned into a half sob. Leaning over, Lyall carefully scooped Remus up in his arms and held him tightly.  

'My dearest boy,' Lyall whispered into Remus' ear, 'we both love you so much, your mother and I.'

'I love you too,' Remus muttered back, feeling somewhat embarrassed.

Lyall pulled away slightly and studied his son's face: 'you are strong Remus, far stronger than you give yourself credit for.'

Remus didn't feel strong. Not in his father's arms, exhausted and in pain. Not when he fell asleep, knowing his father would be gone when he woke up, and especially not when morning arrived, and with it, the empty seat that his father had occupied the previous evening. 

Strong people didn't cry, which was exactly what Remus was doing when the matron came to check on him that morning.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Thanks in no small part to Madam Pomfrey's encouragement, Tuesday marked the first time Remus allowed his friends to visit him in the Hospital Wing. Madam Pomfrey had pointed out that since the boys already knew he was unwell and where he was, there was no harm in letting them see him if he felt up to visitors.

The matron first broached the idea after lunch. Remus had been surprised at the way she addressed him. So far, she had been quite brisk though never unkind. After she had cleared away his lunch, however, she sat down next to him and asked if seeing his friends would be something Remus would find uplifting.

'While company can sometimes be disruptive, there are times when the presence of friends can have an healing, rather than a hindering, effect on recovery,' she said, leaving the decision entirely up to him.

Remus had wanted to see his friends but had been nervous about what to say if they asked about his condition.

'Direct any inquiries about your condition to me. Just say you are unsure,' Madam Pomfrey said with the sort of confidence that made Remus believe they could do this. 'As for your symptoms, feel free to share those with your friends - except, and I hope I needn't say this, any injuries following your transformation.'

Madam Pomfrey's eyes flickered conspiratorially. ‘Keep to the truth, my dear. It is your symptoms they expect you to know, and those are non-descript. I will handle the rest.’

And so it was decided. Peter, James and Sirius visited the Hospital Wing after their final lesson that day.

To Remus' astonishment, Peter burst into tears as soon as he saw him.

'Pete, what's wrong?'

Remus was worried James and Sirius might have done something, but Sirius had put an arm around the boy, albeit with an expression of half-amusement, half-annoyance.

'Pete thinks you're dying,' Sirius explained.

Oh, right. Remus remembered that Peter's father had died of cancer. Too much of Peter's childhood had been marked by disease. No wonder this would scare him. But people got sick all the time.

'We tried to tell him you're not dying,' James added, pulling up a chair beside Remus. 'You're not, are you?'

''Course he's not,' Sirius interjected, moving to sit beside Remus and Peter. 'Only... Pete saw your dad with McGonagall yesterday.'

'So that made us wonder...' James trailed off, his hazel eyes studying Remus intently.

'No, we didn't,' Sirius interrupted quickly. 'You're fine, aren't you?'

Peter sniffed.

'I am fine,'Remus reassured them, squeezing Peter's hand.

‘But your mum's ill, and your dad was here...’ Peter's voice trailed off, tears still streaming down his face.

Sirius rolled his eyes, though there was a forced quality to it.

They all worried, Remus realised. Peter might have been the one to most openly display his concern, but in their own way, none of them was taking this lightly.

How different this would be if they knew. They would want nothing to do with Remus. Was it wrong to deceive them? Didn't they deserve to know the truth? And yet, Remus felt warmth seeing how concerned they were, their display of affection. He had never had friends before Hogwarts. To have friends, for as long as he could keep this secret, was too good to throw away. And Remus knew these friendships had an expiration date. There was no point rushing the truth. They would hate him when they found out anyway, so why not let them add deceit to his list of sins?

'Madam Pomfrey assured me it's nothing to worry about,' Remus said, recalling his conversation with the matron earlier. 'It was just a fever, and yes, it wasn't pleasant, but dad was only here because he was...'

What was Lyall Lupin if not worried? What other reason did a father have to come to Hogwarts? Maybe his father's visit had been a bad idea.

'It's not a big deal,' James reassured, coming unexpectedly to Remus' aid. 'I bet you my mum and dad would be here in a heartbeat if I had a fever. Parents always worry.'

Remus couldn't help but send a smile James' way: 'They do, don't they,' he mused.

Some with more reason than others.

'I tried to tell Pete this, but he wouldn't listen,' James shrugged.

'Pete, how did you know it was my dad with McGonagall?' Remus asked.

'Madam Pomfrey wouldn't let us see you or tell us anything about how you were doing,' Peter explained, his expression a mixture of uncertainty and discomfort. 'So, I went to McGonagall to see if she knew what was up, and just then she came out of her office with your dad... and...'

Peter shrugged helplessly, but Remus couldn't help but feel impressed by Peter's initiative. Remus had the impression that Peter was a little frightened of their head of house, so to go and seek her out was brave.

Sirius glanced quickly at Peter with something that approached pride: 'He's not completely useless, our Pete.'

/

Remus returned to school on Wednesday morning, still a little worse for wear, but worried about missing any more classes. Peter seemed to have found some confidence in knowing that it was he who was the expert on illness of the three other boys. The small boy kept telling Sirius and James off if they walked too fast up or down the stairs for Remus. Though they teased Peter and moaned about 'who had put him in charge' they listened to him.

Sirius took on the task of carrying Remus' books around that first day, telling Remus, not infrequently, that he looked 'like death'. Meanwhile, James had made it his mission to hex anyone (mostly Slytherins) who dared making similar remarks to those of Sirius. His favorite spell for these occasions was the tickling charm Rictumsempra.

'They were laughing at you, it's only fair to give them a helping hand,' James would say whenever Remus tried to suggest James should just leave them be.

But most of those James hexed did far less than laugh at Remus. It was usually just snide comments, which, if they hadn't been about Remus' looks or health, they would have been about something else equally insulting, directed at him or someone else in Gryffindor. Slytherins and Gryffindors insulted each other as a rule.

Fortunately, most students hadn't really noticed anything amiss, which suited Remus just fine. He'd just been unwell for a few days, and as the weather grew wetter, more windy and darker by the day, Remus was not the only one to fall ill.

Remus suspected that James' fervent hexing spree following his return was partly a result of James wanting to demonstrate how he would treat anyone who went against his friends. Remus would have been blind not to notice how affected James had been by the attack on Sirius by Snape. It became more and more evident as the days passed that if there was one person who really felt the force of James' newly learned spells, it was that Slytherin.

James especially seemed to take pleasure in sending tripping jinxes after Snape at particularly precarious moments for the boy. These included when Snape was carrying vials of ingredients back to his cauldron or navigating the final few steps in crowded areas: areas where people would stop, and laugh or jeer at the pale boy with the greasy hair and long nose.

During one incident in the Great Hall, James tripped Snape with a well aimed jinx to much laughter from the Gryffindor table. Enraged, Snape lunged at James. Snape was no match for James even without Sirius, and with his friend, the two managed to overpower the boy within seconds. Mindful of the teachers' presence, neither James or Sirius did anything more than stop Snape from hammering his fists into James' face.

All in all, Snape's attempted muggle-attack did more damage to his reputation than the tripping jinx had done.

'He got a full week's worth of detentions, and everyone now knows what an unhinged bastard that - that thing is,' James spat with such venom that Remus felt a slight tremor down his spine.

'Just be careful,' Sirius remarked casually, though Remus noticed that Sirius' eyes were alert. Like himself, Sirius had picked up on the equally venomous looks Snape sent James. 'We know slimy Snivelly can bite.'

'We'll just have to make sure he doesn't get the chance,' James said dismissively.

Sirius grinned: 'Naturally.'

Returning with forced focus to his transfiguration homework, Remus couldn't shake the unease settling in his gut. He despised bullies, yet here were his friends, veering dangerously close to becoming the very thing he disliked. Worse still, they seemed to be leading Peter down that same path.

It was clear to Remus that Peter knew what it was like to be bullied, so Remus could understand - he really could - that it was tempting for Peter to assume the reverse role - the role that would give him control. Protected by James and Sirius, and never being the one to start confrontations or do much other than to laugh and cheer on his friends, Remus could find it in him to forgive Peter.

It was harder to rationalise James and Sirius behaviour when they targeted Snape or other students, mostly Slytherins. Their justifications ranged from 'she looked like a troll already, I was just helping,' to 'cowards those Carrows and that Yaxley... they were three on one - what were we suppose to do? Ignore the boy?' Remus' replies varied equally from: 'it's nothing to you how she looks' to 'you could get a teacher... or a prefect?'. But all Remus' protestations fell on deaf ears, as far as he could tell.

At times, Remus convinced himself that James and Sirius simply didn't understand that they hurt people. Their capacity to care for each other, and for Remus and Peter, helped Remus in these moments. Surely they were good people? They were good friends. Other times, Remus was more blunt with himself: he didn't cut them out because they were his friends. They were full of life and loyal. Within these first few weeks, Sirius and James had showed Peter and Remus more of Hogwarts than he was sure many in their third year had seen. How could anyone turn their back on such friendships?

In his weakest moments, Remus entertained the idea that he could influence them for the better. But deep down, he knew it was a lie.

/

'Something's not right,' Sirius muttered.

'Hm?'

It was Tuesday evening, the week after the full moon, and Sirius had been restless since tea. James had gone flying, undeterred by the darkness or the rain or the howling wind. While Sirius gladly joined James when the weather was okay, James had never yet been successful at getting his friend to join in these conditions. Remus shared Sirius' view on the matter. However, this left Sirius with only Remus and Peter for company. Having finished most of his homework (though when he and James managed to do any work was anyone's guess), Sirius was bored. And he wasn't shy about letting them know.

'James is back,' Sirius said, and there was a hint of tension in his voice, 'and he's hurt.'

This did get Remus' attention. He looked up, noticing that Peter did the same, to see their friend make his way up to the dormitory, his usually messy hair plastered to his forehead and his robes dripping wet. James looked maybe a bit less happy than usual, but it couldn't have been pleasant, flying in this awful weather.

'Are you sure?'

On the one hand, Remus considered himself quite good on the topic of injuries. He'd seen - that was, he had experienced - a whole array of injuries, after all. And he couldn't see anything amiss with his friend. On the other hand, nobody knew James like Sirius did.

'Well, let's find out, shall we?' Sirius urged, already getting up to follow his friend.

Remus felt a twinge of guilt as Sirius caught James pulling off his flying gear, though he was sure he was the only one with that particular feeling. Sirius threw Remus a somewhat smug "I told you so" look before turning his attention to James, while Peter looked stunned - whether at Sirius' apparent clairvoyance or James' bruised upper body, Remus couldn't tell.

The bruising that was starting to appear across most of James' left side was hard to miss. James was struggling to remove his robes, and, faced with his three friends staring at him, he seemed unsure whether to try to cover up the bruising or just accept the fact that they had all seen it.

'Here, let me help,' Remus offered.

Remus knew too well what it was like trying to wrestle in and out of clothes with injuries. It also kept his mind occupied, a welcome distraction from the nausea creeping up on him.

Sirius had just demonstrated how swiftly things could go awry. Whether James had intended to keep this under wraps or not, Sirius had not given him the choice. That could have been Remus.

It still could be Remus, if he wasn't careful.

'What happened?' Sirius demanded. 'Did you cross paths with Snivellus or those berks from last week - the Carrows and… what's-his-name.'

'Doesn't matter,' James said.

'It bloody well does matter!' Sirius said with feeling. 'They did this, didn't they?!'

'Blimey, calm down, mate! I'm just a bit bruised that's all. And Merlin, of course they didn't do this! Do you think they'd get the better of me?'

A bit bruised was putting it mildly, Remus thought, but he agreed with James. At least this time, it was just bruises. They'd heal, though how James planned to tackle Quidditch practice the next day was beyond him.

Having watched a practice with Peter and Sirius, who'd attempted to explain the sport, Remus hoped it'd make more sense once he watched an actual match. He had seen enough to learn a couple of things: James was indeed very good, and while his skills didn't rival those of his teammates, James was also considerably younger; and, Remus realised, watching his fellow Gryffindors zoom around on brooms was oddly entertaining. Perhaps Quidditch might be fun to watch, after all.

That didn't sway Remus from his view on its dangers, though. He couldn't fathom why anyone would willingly participate. The bludgers had been a real shock: 'players send those balls to knock their opponents off their brooms?' Yes, had been the answer.

'Who did this?' Sirius persisted, his anger palpable as he settled next to the slightly shivering James.

Remus fetched a towel for James. He had to be freezing cold.

James shot Remus a grateful look as he took the towel and tried to wrap himself as best he could.

'Nobody, okay? I just...' James looked distinctly embarrassed, 'had a small crash that was all.'

'You? On a broom?' Sirius looked surprised. Then: 'James, how good is your night vision?'

'It's not that!' James protested. 'I messed up, okay? My vision is as good as anyone's.'

'With glasses,' James quickly amended as Sirius snorted.

'Sirius, we've been sneaking around the castle since our first night. You would have noticed if something was up. I made a mistake, and that's all.'

'That is not all,' Sirius grumbled, but only after he had finally allowed James step into the shower.

'You don't know that,' Remus said.

'The bruising is all wrong. If he fell off the broom maybe…'

'Maybe he crashed and then fell?' Peter suggested.

Sirius looked like he was going to argue back, but then he shrugged: 'Maybe.'

/

'I've got something that might help,' Sirius said once James came out of the shower, noticing how his friend winced as he picked out some dry clothing.

'Just leave that be for a bit and I'll get it.'

'Admit it, you love this view,' James grinned.

Sirius refrained from answering as he dug through his still rather full and distinctly disorganised trunk.

'Here, this should put you right in no time,' Sirius said, tossing a glass bottle with some liquid over to James. 'Shit, sorry, I should have -'

James had caught the bottle, but Sirius' aim hadn't been on point and James grimaced as he was forced to twist his body to grab the bottle.

'How did you get this stuff?' James asked, studying the label. 'This is expensive.'

'Nicked it,' Sirius said. 'From the Elixir Emporium. I had hoped someone would catch me and confront Mother about it, but… no luck. Adults are blind.'

'They are,' James agreed, applying the potion.

But Sirius' story didn't add up. Not that Remus was an expert on theft but he was sure that if Sirius had wanted to get caught stealing, he could have. But why lie about stealing something you hadn't? And if he had stolen a bottle to heal minor injuries and bruises, that begged an entirely different set of questions altogether.

If Sirius was right that James wasn't being truthful, then the two boys were both keeping something from the other.

Well, Remus thought later that night as he listened to James and Sirius' muffled voices, at least I'm not alone in keeping secrets.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

‘James Potter I am going to bloody murder you, you lying piece of shit!’

Some Gryffindor students jumped at Sirius’ sudden outburst, but what did he care?

Sirius was not pleased with James. Not bloody pleased at all. The git. The moronic imbecile of a flobber-

‘What’s up?’ James asked, appearing by Sirius’ side as if by magic.

Sirius felt like the wiser choice by far would have been for James to run from him. Mind you, if James had possessed even a single cell in his body that cared about self-preservation, Sirius would not need to talk some sense into the git.

Peter too looked like he thought James might have wanted to avoid Sirius. He looked nervously between Sirius and James. Remus on the other hand wore an expression of dawning realisation.

Yes, Sirius thought, I was right about the whole bloody flying incident.

‘Flying lessons,’ he gritted out, pointing at the notice board, ‘are cancelled for the foreseeable future. Care to guess why?’

‘Erm…’

Well, James had the decency to look ashamed at least.

‘Let’s get out of here…’ Remus mumbled, looking around the common room, and Sirius agreed to move the discussion to a secret passageway a few floors down.

‘Listen, Sirius, it’s not a big -‘ James started as they were out of earshot and safely hidden behind a tapestry.

‘It is a big deal,’ Sirius’ words came out as a snarl. He was angry. The idiot.

‘Pete, remind me, why is flying lessons cancelled?’ Sirius asked Peter.

‘The weather,’ Peter said, looking unhappy at being dragged into this. Sirius was bloody unhappy, and he didn't care if he made the others so as well.

‘Exactly… The school brooms are not considered  safe  in this weather.’

‘Look,’ James started, ‘you’re overreacting -‘

Sirius was not "overreacting".

‘You have been flying those brooms in all sorts of conditions, you utter lunatic. The day you crashed there was a bloody storm.’

‘I had complete control -‘

‘Did you? Or did you get blown off course James… and hit something.’

‘It’s not just about the brooms,’ James said defensively. ‘It’s about skill-‘

‘YOU’RE AN ELEVEN YEARS OLD KID YOU IDIOT! NOT SOME BLOODY QUIDDITCH PRO!’

‘Sirius…’ Remus tried.

‘YOU LIED!’

That was why Sirius didn't trust people. Nobody spoke the bloody truth. He'd seen James lie, of course, but he had hoped, stupidly, that James wouldn't have lied to him. He had wanted James to have been different.  

‘I didn’t,’ James said quickly. ‘Sirius, mate, I wouldn’t lie to you. You know I wouldn’t. I said I crashed and I did.’

‘There are many forms of lying, James! You’re flying - alone - on brooms that could get you  killed  in these conditions, and you failed to mention all this when we spoke.’

‘Well, he won't be flying on those brooms anymore, will you James?’ Remus tried once more.

James bit his lip, and some of Sirius' anger subsided when he saw that James was unwilling to promise Remus he wouldn’t, which would have been the easy route. He could simply say "yes" and then break the promise. James had said he hadn't lied, and while Sirius still felt that was up for debate, he felt better for knowing that James hadn't seen the conversation in the dormitory as deceptive.

The betrayal felt less severe, but the worry had not gone away. No, not worry, Sirius amended quickly in his mind. Sirius wasn't worried about anyone. He was just prudent... except, when had he ever been prudent? Watchful then. Yes, that was right. Sirius was being watchful.

‘No, I will. I’m sorry Remus,' James said, 'first years aren't allowed their own brooms, you know that… I’ve  got to  practice on these brooms. Who knows what sort of conditions these matches might be in?’

‘You’re a reserve,’ Sirius felt himself practically beg, ‘don’t be an idiot.’

‘I won’t,’ James said. ‘I’m many things, but not an idiot.’

Sirius wanted to believe James, but he liked his friend because James was an idiot. They both were. Being idiotic was part of the fun.

Remus too had started to look worried. Well, Remus knows we are idiots, so that figures.

‘You can’t seriously believe he will be able to maintain control on those brooms? Sirius, there’s no way-‘ Remus started in an urgent whisper to Sirius as they made their way to breakfast that day.

‘Tell the Dorcus that, not me. If you want to try to stop him, I mean. But I don’t think you’ll meet with more success than I have.’

‘But it could go really wrong. Like you said. You’d think with Alexandra Shafiq being his cousin...‘

‘Give it a rest, Remus. I’m sure it’ll be fine.’

What else could he say? Sirius was still angry with James. Still worried (not worried!) that the fool could get himself seriously injured. But he also knew that James was good on a broom - and he was Sirius Bloody Black. Flowing through Sirius' veins there had to be some of that cunning Slytherins prized so much, alongside all the other poison. What else was his Black heritage worth? If he played his cards correctly, they’d get James through this Quidditch season, and then he'd be allowed his own broom.

The first promising sign was that James decided not to fly more that week, except from attending his Quidditch practice on Friday. It was a truce offering of sorts, and Sirius accepted it without hesitation. The weather looked like it might clear up a bit by the end of the weekend, and so all in all, Sirius didn’t feel too bad once he'd had a chance to consider matters more closely. 

/

‘I was thinking of visiting Hagrid tomorrow,’ James said on Friday evening.

The four friends sat around the fire in the common room. James had come back from Quidditch practice a while ago, (taking pleasure in McLaggen's broken nose, even though it had meant an earlier than usual finish) and for once even Remus had put aside his long scrolls of homework. The heat of fire licked their skin, the embers crackled happily and life was exactly like it was supposed to be on a stormy Friday in the middle of October.

‘Hagrid is..?’ Peter asked.

‘The gamekeeper,’ Remus said.

‘That's right - though I think only recently,' Sirius said, slightly surprised. 

It wasn't often Remus was up-to-speed on all things Hogwarts-related, despite his father being a wizard. The same was true of Peter, as he had proven with his question. Clearly, having one muggle parent changed things about how people were raised.

’He was the one who took us across the lake, remember? That really big fellow,’ James explained to Peter. Actually, Sirius had forgotten that part - too much had happened before (meeting James) and after (being sorted into Gryffindor) to remember that the gamekeeper had taken them across the lake.

’The giant?’ asked Peter.

'That one,’ Sirius confirmed. ‘My family hates him. You don’t think he’d mind if I came along?’

Sirius felt positively relaxed by the crackling fire. Outside, the wind and rain battled with near equal force to break through the glass windows, yet within the common room, the bustling energy of his fellow Gryffindor students warmed him as much as the fire did. He couldn't have been further away from Grimmauld Place if he'd travelled to the other side of the world.

'I thought we should all go,’ James suggested, ‘I want to introduce you!’

‘How d’you know him?’ Sirius asked.  

James looked into the fire as he said, with slight hesitation: ‘he might have helped me… that day with the crash y’know.’

Peter looked over at Sirius, possibly to gauge his reaction. But Sirius wasn’t in the mood. The fire kept roaring, it was the weekend and he had got the scent of a new opportunity to annoy his family. All that was left was to find a way for his mother to learn that he’d seen the gamekeeper.  

Suddenly, shrieks interrupted Sirius' meditative scheming, and the four boys looked up to see what was causing the uproar. Peeves the Poltergeist materialised out of nowhere. The little man zoomed above the heads of the rapidly disbursing students, cackling loudly as he observed the scene below him:

'The lions are brave when there's nothing to fear;
But they shriek and they cry as Peeves-y appear;
One moment there's peace, then as from thin air;
The master of chaos, is here... is there... is everywhereeee....'

‘Let’s get out of here,’ Sirius mumbled to the others, as they all tried to become as invisible as possible, hiding amids the erupting chaos.

‘Where to?’ James asked eagerly - always keen for the next new adventure.

‘Anywhere,’ Sirius said as he kept a close eye on the poltergeist.

‘It’s curfew soon,’ Remus observed, ducking to avoid a school bag that Peeves had just flung across the room. ‘Let’s just go up to the dormitory.’

‘Good luck with that,’ Sirius said, dryly.

As most other Gryffindor students seemed to have the same idea as Remus, the stairs became blocked with panicking students. As first years, Remus, and in particular Peter, would be amongst the absolute smallest trying to push their way to safety. The safety might also be temporary: there was nothing that would stop Peeves from following up the stairs as far as Sirius could tell.

‘You’ll be crushed,’ James observed, and Remus and Peter seemed to have reached the same conclusion.

‘Let’s head to the kitchen,’ James suggested. ‘I’m starving.’ 

James always was after practice.

Nobody seemed to object to that idea. Peter was usually always a big supporter of food-related plans, Remus had yet to see the kitchen and Sirius was just happy to be out on an adventure, now that the armchairs by the fireplace were out of the question.

They left the Gryffindor common room, catching one last verse from the poltergeist: 

'The frightened ickle kittens scatter to the wind;
Now their claim of bravery will quickly wear thin;
Poor kittens, against Peeves their chances are slim;
Peeves is making them pay for one ghost's siiiiiin.'

Agreeing to visit the kitchen did mean Sirius had to endure James' teasing about Lulu for most of the journey there, which was ridiculous. All house elves behaved like she did. And yes he’d been nice to her, of course he had. And maybe he’d been a bit overjoyed to speak to a house elf he didn’t immediately feel a strong need to kick. And maybe she had appreciated that. But that was it. House elves didn't develop crushes on humans. The fact that James hadn’t found anything better to tease him about than a house elf spoke more to James’ imagination than anything else.

On the way down they were passed by a sprinting Gryffindor fifth year and prefect, who seemed to be looking for the Bloody Baron.

‘Apparently, he’s the only one who can exert any control over Peeves,’ Peter told the others.

‘And how in Merlin’s name do you know that?’ James asked.

‘Nicholas de Mimsy Porpington told me.’

‘Pete, stop being such a wet blanket and call him Nearly Headless Nick, like a normal person,’ Sirius begged.

 /

As they were in fact past curfew by the time they left the kitchen (pockets bulging with cakes and pastries they both wanted and wouldn't have been able to refuse if they didn't) the boys made use of every secret passageway they knew. But they needn’t have worried. Professor McGonagall, the Gryffindor prefects and Frank Longbottom had their hands full that evening with Peeves, so the boys had an easy journey making their way back upstairs, until they suddenly ran into some unexpected company.

Two Slytherin prefects had taken advantage of the chaos to make use of one of the secret staircases for some private space. James and Sirius, who were at the front of their little group, paused as soon as they saw that the passage was occupied, and Sirius could feel Peter and Remus stop right behind them.

‘Let’s turn before they noti-‘ Remus whispered.

‘Cissy, what in Merlin’s name are you doing with that git?’ Sirius said, walking up to his cousin and the pale, pointed oddity that was Lucius Malfoy.

‘That’s disgusting, that is,’ James said, following Sirius lead, ‘you should really go somewhere private before you decide to snog each other’s brains out.’

‘This was private,’ Narcissa Black hissed.

‘Well, well, well, if it isn’t Sirius Black and the blood traitor brat - and I see you brought new friends too,' Lucius' cold eyes flitted to Remus and Peter before turning back to meet Sirius'.

'I think, Sirius,' James said with forced cheerfulness, 'that I am meant to find that insulting.' 

'So...' Lucius said lazily, 'four Gryffindor students out after curfew... that will be 20 points off each, I think. 80 points, gone... just like that.'

Lucius smirked, and Sirius had to fight not to punch the self-satisfied slimeball right in his face, preferably breaking his nose. It was so tempting.

Sirius heard a squeal escape Peter, and Sirius felt a pang of guilt towards Remus and Peter. They hadn't wanted to be there. This was Sirius' and James' doing. While he wished Remus could care a little less about school rules, he knew this would hit him hard, and Sirius didn't like that. 

This wasn't over, though, Sirius thought, as he said aloud: 'We'll just say that you lied. We haven't been out after curfew. Cissy has just screamed her head off in front of the teachers, it's a known fact that she's out to get us.'

'You forget that it's two prefects words against those of four snotty little first years. Two of which have already spent more time in detention than I have during my entire time here,' Lucius said.

'Seriously?' James cried out, 'blimey, you're boring!'

Sirius couldn't help but let out a laugh he quickly turned into a cough. James was worth all the gold Sirius' parents owned, and then some.  

'Don't you think it's likely that what you were doing when you supposedly "caught us" would come out? I wasn't planning to keep it a secret,' Sirius observed.

'No, it's good stuff, this. Newsworthy,' James agreed. 

'Like we care,' Cissy said, dismissively, 'our parents won't object to the relationship.'

'And that, James, is what matters in life,' Sirius said, annoyed, forgetting for an instant that James too did care about his family's approval.

'Tell me Cissy,' Sirius continued, 'are you putting yourself through this torture for Andy? Is this your sisterly affection shown at last? Or do you just want to prove that you can get that thing,' Sirius nodded towards Lucius. 

'It can't be his looks,' James agreed.

'Nor his personality, trust me,' Sirius assured James.

'Andromeda is no sister of mine,' Cissy said, with such revulsion that Sirius was momentarily taken aback.

'I should hope not,' Lucius said. 'Now if that was all...'

'M-maybe -' came a thin voice from the shadows, and Sirius turned to see Peter taking a small, highly tentative, step forward. 

Sirius didn't like it when his brother was cowardly, and yet Sirius felt uneasy on the few occasions Regulus did stand up to his parents, suddenly nervous about what they would do to him, knowing how much weaker Regulus was than Sirius. This felt exactly the same. Sirius felt a sudden urge to step in and protect the stupid, timid boy, who seemed to want to help.

'Mr M-Malfoy...'

Peter looked absolutely frightened as Lucius' pale grey eyes found him.

'Yes?' Lucius asked, with an air of disinterest. Sirius, who knew Lucius better than he'd ever wanted to, could nevertheless see the curiosity he was trying so hard to disguise.

'M-maybe if you only took 10 points off each...' Peter looked extremely uncomfortable, reminding Sirius most about a small mouse, caught in a trap and looking up at a hungry cat.

'And why would I do that?' Lucius asked, a hint of derision in his voice.

'Then we wouldn't say anything, would we, guys?'

Sirius was not in the mood to make bargains with people like Lucius Malfoy. The only price dementors accept is your soul, as his uncle Alphard would have said. 

To Sirius' great astonishment, Lucius gave a jerk of his head and said: 'if that be the case.'

''course,' James said, quickly, and the decision was taken out of Sirius' hands. 

'Pleasure doing business, Lucifer,' Sirius said as they left the two prefects. 

He wasn't sure if he cared about those forty points they had just saved. At least not at the expense of being able to annoy Cissy and Lucius, who evidently weren't ready to publicise any relationship. However, he was not going to leave either with the impression that Sirius Black hadn't been entirely in control of the situation.

/

'I told you there was something going on,' Sirius said to James as soon as they were back in their dormitory.

Peeves had thankfully cleared the place and while many students who were now looking for their belongings in the destroyed common room spotted the four boys climbing through the portrait hole (Gideon Prewett included), everyone seemed too exhausted to stop them and tell them off.

'What?' James asked, swallowing a large piece of a chocolate eclair.

'With my family,' Sirius said. 'Don't you remember our second day here?'

'Mate, my memory is good, but not that good.'

'Cissy calling me a small inconvenience, or something like that... That's how we ended up pranking her.'

'That's right... I do remember.'

Sirius rolled his eyes.

'So what about it?' James asked.

'Well, now she's saying that Andy is no sister of hers.'

'The Slytherin girl who befriended other houses and muggle-borns, right?'

Sirius nodded: 'I wonder what she's done now.'

'Well, why don't you ask?'

'Who?' 

'Mate, I don't know, do I? Andromeda? Your mum? Her mum?'

'I could ask Regulus,' Sirius said, considering the matter.

'Who's that?' James asked.

Oh right, he hadn't told James about his brother, and - Sirius realised - he wasn't going to either. Not yet.

Why Sirius wasn't ready to tell James about Regulus when he had already told James about his parents pureblood obsession, his aunt's constant scheming to get her daughters married respectably and even Andy's small acts of defiance, he didn't know. Only, what would he say? 

"He's my brother, but he's a coward who will no doubt end up in Slytherin," - no, that put him in with the likes of Snivellus in James' eyes. Regulus wasn't like Snivellus, Regulus could also be fun, and he cared deeply - too deeply - about not disappointing people. That was why he never could stand up to anyone.

"He's my brother, and I am scared he will end up like my parents," - yeah right, if he said that, James would just think Sirius was pathetic.

"He's my brother, but I have never felt as close to him as I do to you," - absolutely not. What would James think if he knew that the closest relationship Sirius had ever had didn't even measure up to whatever he and James had developed in less than two months? 

'Nobody important,' Sirius said quickly, wondering as he did so whether he was lying to James or not. Then again, had he ever been truly truthful with James? More so than others, but that didn't say much. Everyone lied, Sirius reminded himself. 

Sirius Black was no different.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

The following afternoon, the four boys braved the stormy weather as they left the castle and made their way across the Hogwarts grounds. Hagrid lived in a small wooden house on the edge of the Forbidden Forest. 

When James knocked they heard a frantic scrabbling from inside and several eager barks. Then Hagrid's voice ran out: 'Back, Thunder - back.'

'Hi Thunder,' James said enthusiastically once Hagrid had managed to let them in. 'Nice to see you again.' 

The Irish Wolfhound sniffed James happily, before she bounded on Sirius and tried to lick his face. Sirius laughed and stroked the dog. 

'Good ter see you, James. How're them bruises doin', eh? Make yerselves at home.'

'Fine, thanks. Hagrid, these are my friends: Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius erm...' it was in that moment James regretted introducing their last names too. 'Black,' James finished lamely.

He sent an apologetic look to his friend, who was still much occupied with Thunder. Sirius sent him a quick "it's not your problem" look.

''Bout time I were introduced ter th' only Black ever ter land himself in Gryffindor, eh?' Hagrid said, his beetle eyes twinkling kindly as he smiled down at Sirius, who had seated himself on the floor next to Thunder. Sirius returned Hagrid's smile, but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

'Jus' goes ter show that even in families full o' nutcases - no offence meant, Sirius -'

'Believe me, none taken,' Sirius said with feeling.

'There can come somethin' good, after all.'

'I hope we're not disturbing,' Remus said, and James noticed that Remus' eyes had landed on two empty, but clearly used, tea mugs.

'Oh that were Dumbledore. He and I were havin' a chat 'bout some rumo- But - er - he's gone now,' Hagrid seemed unsure of himself: 'Right, better clear up. Yer be wantin' some tea ter warm yerselves up? Nasty weather an' all.' 

'Rumours, what rumours?' James asked, exchanging a quick look with Sirius.

Hagrid didn't answer right away, but when he sat down the steaming mugs of tea and some rock cakes that James immediately regretted helping himself to, it seemed Hagrid had made up his mind to tell them.

'Ah, it was nothin' important. There are some right wild talk flyin' 'round in Hogsmeade. There's this new house, see? It's up a ways from the rest, boarded-up windows and all. Folks says it's haunted by a rough crowd of ghosts. Codswallop, I say. Just the usual fuss when somethin' new appears. But Dumbledore, he's not so sure. Asked me to keep an eye on it, he did.'

Hagrid drew himself up proudly: 'He usually gets me ter do important stuff fer him.'

/

'What do you guys think?' James said as they made their way back to dinner, pockets full of rock cakes they had been too polite to decline. 

'Hagrid seems nice,' Peter said.

'The rumours, Pete,' Sirius said impatiently. 'James was asking about the rumours.'

'Oh,' Peter said.

'I am with Hagrid,' Sirius said, 'sounds like a lot of village rubbish.'

James' heart sank. It'd be a lot more fun if it wasn't village rubbish.

'A new house appears with boarded up windows,' James tried, 'I think that sounds like something we should explore? We could help Hagrid!'

''Course we'll explore! I am just saying... it's probably nothing. Remus, what do you think?'

'I don't know,' Remus said, 'but it could be dangerous, so it might be best if we leave this to Hagrid and Dumbledore.'

Sirius shook his head: 'Mate, no risk, no story.'

'C'mon,' James pushed, 'look, it's a Hogsmeade weekend on October 30th. It's perfect. We can explore the village under cover of the other students, like we said we would and we can check out this house.'

'I distinctly remember that you and Sirius agreed to visit the village during the Hogsmeade weekend, but I am not sure Peter or I ever did.'

'But it's basically Halloween, there's no better time to check out a haunted house!' James couldn't understand how Remus couldn't see the appeal.

'Pete?' Remus asked.

'Could be fun, I suppose' Peter mumbled, 'but Remus is right, it could be really haunted.'

'And what is the worst thing a ghost has ever done to you?' Sirius asked. 'Merlin, what's wrong with people all of a sudden. Guess it'll be just you and me, Jamie.'

'I'll come,' Peter said quickly.

Remus smiled helplessly: 'I guess I don't have a choice?'

'That's right,' James said.

'Glad you're catching on,' Sirius agreed.

/ 

Nearly Headless Nick was in utter disgrace in the weeks following Peeves’ attack on the Gryffindors. It turned out he had tried to scold Peeves about one thing or another, wanting, no doubt, to prove he could be just as intimidating as the Bloody Baron. Peeves seemed to have a different view on the matter.

‘And that, Pete, is why you don’t challenge someone unless you know you’re the top dog,’ Sirius said, putting an arm around his friend as they made their way to the greenhouses that Monday morning.

Catching James’ eyes, he winked, and James knew that Sirius, like James, shared the ambition of mounting that very spot among the student population; once they knew enough spells to win - and defend - that top position.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

James knew Sirius had held out some hope that the weather would improve (as had James), but there they were both sorely disappointed. Despite Sirius' many assertions, James preferred to fly when he didn’t feel like he was frozen to the broom. Plus, whatever he might have told Sirius about his vision, it wasn’t exactly easy to see with glasses in these conditions. But he had to get used to it. Quidditch didn’t get cancelled because of bad weather!

There was one significant improvement since earlier: Sirius now joined James, despite the wind whipping their faces so forcefully it brought tears to their eyes, and the rain drenching them within minutes of mounting their brooms. While they sometimes stayed within the confines of the Quidditch pitch, the two also explored the school grounds. Especially on those rare occasions when it didn’t rain, James could show Sirius the thrill of flying with strong winds.

The speed that even the school brooms could attain when aided by a strong tailwind was phenomenal. Although flying into a headwind could be frustrating, it too had its moments of enjoyment. Being blown off course while chasing a Quaffle wasn’t fun, but unexpectedly being thrown twenty to fifty feet one way or another when flying over the lakes or the treetops was exhilarating. Although James couldn't hear the laughs that escaped Sirius when this happened to his friend, he could sometimes see his flushed face, filled with excitement and delight.

Sometimes, it nearly went wrong, but as they kept reminding each other: no risk, no story!

On one occasion, a gust of wind came so unexpectedly that James had to use all his skills to remain on the broom. He therefore knew, with almost gut-wrenching certainty, that Sirius hadn’t stayed on his broom. Scanning the area he had last seen Sirius, he saw that his friend was gone. James therefore wasn't surprised to see Sirius’s head and flopping arms when he looked down, surveying the Black Lake. Sirius was struggling to stay afloat, his robes soaking wet and dragging him down.

It was too far to swim. James swooped down to try to lift his friend onto the broom, but too much of Sirius's body was submerged, and the winds—those damned winds they had enjoyed moments earlier—made it impossible for James to stay still for long. It took almost all his effort to avoid being thrown into the lake himself. Despite the fact they both knew Sirius wouldn't make it, Sirius started swimming, realising that James would be unable to do much. Within a few minutes, however, they were proven right: it was all Sirius could do to keep his head above water.

‘I was sure I was a gonner,’ Sirius explained casually to the captivated audience that was the Gryffindor first years, minus Lily, who didn’t spent more time in the common room than she could help.

‘You were a gonner,’ James agreed. 

It was easy talking about it now - fun even - how Sirius had escaped near certain death.

'Sure, but he's still breathin', so what happened?' Maeve asked.

One of the better things to have come out of the last few days had been that Maeve seemed to be speaking to James again. James had no idea what had changed, if anything, but one day Maeve had sat down next to James and Sirius in the common room after they’d been out flying, and that had been it. Waiting for Peter and Remus to return from the library, the three had discussed Gryffindor’s chances to win against Hufflepuff. Gryffindor had never not caught the snitch against Macmillan (‘Me and Ciara can't work out how that fella became captain’). Then again, Gryffindor had never had someone like McLaggen as a seeker either.

Now Maeve and Mary sat squeezed into an armchair, both looking mightily impressed with Sirius and James. Peter, Lizzie and Gemma, all sitting cross-legged on the floor, also looked amazed and had been following the story with interest. Remus, occupying an armchair to himself however, wore a strange expression; almost closed. James wondered if he didn’t approve of their adventure.

‘Suddenly I felt something under my legs, and first I thought I’d actually got myself onto some shallow part of the lake or something… only' Sirius paused for dramatic effect: 'the ground moved.’ 

Rather than looking at the audience to gauge their reaction, Sirius met James’ eyes. James looked hungrily back at his best friend. No risk, no story! And Sirius and James had the best stories to tell!

The girls and Peter gasped.

‘The giant squid?’ Mary asked.

‘The one and only,’ Sirius confirmed. Peter's mouth fell open.

‘It pushed Sirius up far enough that we could get him on my broom,’ James explained.

‘And that was it, really,’ Sirius finished.

That hadn’t been it of course. Shaking from adrenaline and the cold air, Sirius had held James so firmly that James struggled to draw breath as they flew to the shore. Once they had solid ground under their legs, they had both toppled off the broom and onto the grass, and after a moment of looking at each other in astonishment, they had both burst out laughing. Having started, it was difficult to stop.

They might have been frozen to the bone, their lungs might have been protesting at the continued lack of oxygen, but in that moment James couldn’t have stopped laughing more than he could have detached his lungs from his chest. James loved his life at Hogwarts, he loved flying and he loved Sirius.

Remus didn’t say anything before they were up in the dormitory, but then he turned to them both: ‘you could have died,’ he said seriously.

‘Come off it, Remus,’ Sirius shrugged, ‘I didn’t, did I?’

‘No risk, no story,’ James agreed.

Despite their mantra however, the two boys stuck to the Quidditch pitch from then onwards. They took it in turn to play keeper, James not wanting Sirius to be dead bored by always guarding the goal posts, and sometimes the two left the goal posts completely unguarded while they passed the Quaffle between them moving toward the goals and passing the ball easily through the hoops.

Sirius was not as good as James, but it made a nice change for James who usually played with people that were much older and better than him - whether that was his cousin Sarah, his cousin (of sorts) Carl Potter or the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Plus, James truly could not imagine anything more fun than flying with his best friend. 

/

The following Saturday was the day of the four boys' planned adventure to explore the haunted house of Hogsmeade. In the end, it came with a few catches.

Remus got some news that morning that his mother had become unwell again.

‘We can postpone the visit if you want, can’t we?’ Peter half offered; half asked the three boys.

‘’Course we can,’ James said, albeit feeling a bit disappointed.

‘Don’t bother,’ Remus said, looking pale and tired. ‘I’ll just pack some stuff and be out of here. Why don’t you tell me all about it when I return.’

‘Let’s just hope his mother is alive when he returns,’ Sirius said, voice hoarse and slightly muffled through his scarf, as they made their way from Hogsmeade station into the wizarding village after breakfast that day.

The other catch had been that both James and Sirius had woken up with cold-like symptoms. Both had sore throats, Sirius had a runny nose and James a slight headache. But those were small obstacles in comparison with the adventure ahead.

Remus had forced them both to wrap up tightly before they left the dormitory, which they had. They and Peter had then left their friend and set off using the only passageway they knew to get out of school.

‘At least no one will be able to recognise us,’ James said thinking of the scarfs and their hats.

Just then he was also thankful for the dark clouds that kept any bright light at bay. His headache wasn’t bad, but bright sunlight (if such a thing existed in Scotland outside the summer months) was not something he would have appreciated just then.

The supposedly haunted house stood, as Hagrid had told them, a little away from the rest of the village. The windows were indeed boarded up tightly and try as he might, James could not catch a single glimpse of what lay beyond. Beside him, Sirius scanned the facade for any sign of entry. Peter lingered a few steps behind, but that didn't bother James. He wasn't exactly sure how Peter could have helped the two, so the fact that he wasn't getting in the way was good enough for James. 

'I don't get it!' James exclaimed, unable to contain his frustration. 'Who is mental enough to build a house you can't get into? What in Merlin's name is the point?!'

'Bloody beats me,' Sirius said, not able to tear his eyes off the house, and James suspected Sirius wasn't willing to admit defeat yet.

'Sod it,' Sirius said eventually, scowling at the house.

Disappointed, the three boys headed back to the main street. As both Sirius and James felt less energetic than usual, neither felt especially keen to explore all the shops bustling with students. But they weren’t keen to leave without anything to show for their adventure either.

‘We could go in there,’ Sirius suggested, without conviction, pointing at an inn called The Three Broomsticks.

‘’E looks a little young for thirteen,’ a voice said.

The voice turned out to belong to a man with short, bandy legs and straggly ginger hair. He couldn’t be long out of Hogwarts and he had eyes that were slightly bloodshot. Just then he held out a bony - and very dirty - hand which was pointing at Peter.

‘He’s just a bit short, that’s all,’ James said, for the first time painfully aware of how young his voice sounded.

‘You’re all a bit short, unless my eyes deceive me,’ the man said. ‘Shame, bet you’ve never had butterbeer before.’

‘’Course we have,’ Sirius lied, unfortunately not before Peter managed to ask: ‘what’s that?’

Sirius looked mightily annoyed.

The man smiled crookedly: ‘it’s good stuff. I’ve got some ‘ere. Not quite the quality you’d get at the Brooms’ but I don’t care who you are neither. Only 5 Sickles a bottle!'

‘5 Sickles for this doxy piss?’ A familiar voice said.

The prefect, and fellow Quidditch player, Gideon Prewett had just appeared, together with their Quidditch captain, and Gideon’s brother, Fabian Prewett. They were joined by a girl with a sweet, round face, who James recognised as the girl who had been with the two boys after the try-outs.

James quickly took off his glasses, hoping that it would make him harder to recognise. Unfortunately, he suspected Fabian had seen him do just that.

Even at the best of times, James' eyesight couldn’t be described as good and with the dark sky he was now more or less entirely reliant on people’s voices.

‘Eh, what’s that you call doxy piss? This is from the ‘ogs ‘ead this is.’

‘Paid for and never tampered with? Come off it, Dung,’ Gideon said.

‘I bet you he’s watered it down with something…I wouldn’t put piss past him,’ Fabian said.

‘There’s no piss, I tell you!’

‘So just water then?’ Fabian asked. 'Tell me, how much butterbeer is there in one of these bottles? Half a bottle? A third?'

‘If it’s mostly water, then there’s no ‘arm to me selling it to 'em kids.’

‘Except for fraud,’ Gideon said.

‘And you’re stealing customers from a "respectable establishment",’ Fabian added, 'I don't think that's entirely legal, do you, Gid?'

‘What’s it to you two, anyways, eh? These kiddos aren’t old enough to go in there. I’m not nicking nobody’s customers.’

‘Is that so?’ Gideon said slowly, and from the way Sirius shifted beside James and Peter practically shivered on James’ other side, James suspected the prefect was giving them a closer look than earlier. James was grateful for the scarf that hid most of his face.

‘See? No ‘arm done. They want butterbeers. Rosmerta can’t sell it to 'em. I am ‘ere to officiate.’

‘Your generosity never ceases to amaze me, Dung,’ Fabian said.

'But if these are Hogwarts students,’ Gideon continued.

‘Then this quickly becomes Gideon’s problem,’ Fabian finished.

‘They’re not old enough for school,’ the man - Dung - said, ‘look at 'em, they can’t be more than ten.’

 At this, Sirius made a slight hissing noise.

‘Oh well, that alright then,’ the girl said, the disbelief in her voice evident.

‘Yeah, if these kids are below school age we feel so much better,’ Fabian continued sarcastically.

‘Ouch, what didja do that for?’

It sounded like Dung had just been slapped by someone.

‘You are selling stolen butterbeer with Merlin knows what content to ten years olds you...-’ the girl said hotly.

‘Son-of-a-bludger springs to mind,’ Fabian suggested. ‘And next time Alice, just punch the spineless little thing.’

‘Or hex him,’ Gideon suggested, with disgust.

‘Eh, I’m right ‘ere.’

‘And you better be gone soon, Dung, before I get law enforcement,’ Gideon said with such authority that James wasn't surprised to hear the unmistakable sound of someone disapparating.

Nobody spoke for a bit, and James allowed himself to believe they had gotten away with it when-:

‘And you three, Potter, Black and er…’

‘Pettigrew,’ Peter added before realising just how stupid that was. James didn’t need glasses to picture Peter’s face or Sirius look of disbelief at his friend’s words. But as his disguise had failed, James slipped on the glasses again just in time to see Fabian looking mildly amused.

‘Pettigrew,’ Gideon continued, ‘you three better have an -‘

‘Oh come off it, Gid,’ Fabian said quickly, ‘how many times haven’t we snuck out to Hogsmeade in our time?’

‘Don’t - and that’s not the point,’ Gideon said, scowling at his brother.

The girl, Alice, giggled.

‘Bet you they used the secret passageway behind the mirror on the fourth floor,’ Fabian said, lightly elbowing Alice.

‘Or the passageway behind the one eyed witch on the third floor…’ Alice continued, ‘you know, the one that leads into the basement of-‘

‘Alright, alright, stop it you two before you give away something.’

‘We?’ Alice and Fabian said looking at each other with mischievous grins.

‘Brother, I would never,’ Fabian said, shaking his head.

‘And you trust me, don’t you Gid?’ the girl asked, although she didn’t sound as confident as she had earlier.

‘I do, but -‘

James had expected a snappier reply from Gideon.

‘Then trust us when we say leave them be,’ Fabian said firmly. 

‘Don’t worry, Longbottom needs never know,’ Fabian continued with a slight smirk when Gideon didn't reply. 

Gideon sighed.

Just like that, Sirius, James and Peter escaped with no more than a warning and with two new passageways they could explore… another time.

The three boys spent the remainder of the weekend in front of the fire in the common room and enjoying as much food as they could eat at the Halloween feast. By the time Remus returned from his parents, Tuesday evening November 2nd, any cold Sirius and James might have had was gone and the two agreed they were ready for new adventures with their friends.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had gone to the Hospital Wing much earlier than he had needed to. He couldn’t afford waiting until the boys thought he was ill again. If he fell sick every full moon it wouldn’t take them long to figure out what was wrong. Besides, what was there to miss out on over the weekend? Exploring a haunted house that was in fact only terrorised once a month, by a boy-turned-monster called Remus Lupin. 

The only mystery as far as Remus could tell was how the villagers weren’t eventually going to put two and two together, though it seemed Dumbledore was at work, even here. As for his friends exploring the house, Remus had decided to put his trust in Dumbledore's design. If Dumbledore hadn't meant for anyone to enter the house from the outside, surely three first years would be unable to access it.

Making his way to the abandoned house for the third time since he got to Hogwarts, Remus this time had the presence of mind to notice James' glasses as he approached the now frozen tree. Without really thinking about how he’d return the glasses to its owner, or whether that would even be necessary by now, Remus bent down and grabbed them.

By the time he’d laid down in the four poster bed he always used while he waited, Remus realised he hadn’t given the upcoming transformation as much thought as he usually would. Maybe having been in the Hospital Wing, everything had felt so taken care of. While not thinking too much about it may have been a good thing - there was nothing he could do to improve the situation in any case - the reality of what was about to happen hit Remus with such force that he really wanted to run after Madam Pomfrey and beg her to stop it from happening. Shit, he’d never been less ready in his life.

‘I don’t want this,’ he whispered to nobody, as tears ran down his cheeks.

His body was shaking as he fought with all his might not to get up, not to try to escape the inescapable. The pain that had been kept at bay by the potions was now slowly increasing, and yet it would be another half an hour, at least, before the transformation started. It would be short, it always was, but as every bone twisted and grew or shrank and bent or snapped as the grown wolf left the young boy behind, it didn’t need to last long for Remus to lose all sense of time.

‘I don’t want this,’ Remus pleaded with the ever empty room.

It wouldn’t stop with the transformation. Once that was over, there were the hours of feeling his claws and jaw rip into his own flesh, when he wasn’t busy destroying everything else around him. Remus might be unable to control his actions but he was present for it all, he could feel it all. He was the wolf and the wolf was him and no amount of pretending otherwise would do. It was what people - normal people - couldn’t understand.

‘I don’t want this, please…’

But the full moon showed no mercy.

/

‘It’s a bit early for mail,’ James observed the first morning Remus was back in the dormitory, as a tawny owl knocked on the glass window next to Sirius' bed.

Remus had once more made it through a transformation. Though he at first had believed he’d never be able to forget the terrors, he had been surprised at how fast he’d been drawn back into the everyday life of Sirius Black, James Potter and Peter Pettigrew. He had been worried when they had told him their adventures to Hogsmeade had been successful, but when he discovered they had failed to learn anything about the house and the success was due to a discovery of new passageways, he’d been surprisingly excited to learn more.

‘It’s from Andy!’ Sirius said excitedly, ‘James, we might learn what’s been happening after all.’

‘I didn’t realise you wrote to her,’ James said, rushing over to read Sirius' letter.

Sirius’ eyes scanned the note. His face assumed an expression that was hard for Remus to discern.

‘Sirius, is… is everything alright?’ Peter asked, walking over to James and Sirius. Remus decided to join the three others.

‘I can’t believe it,’ Sirius said as he folded the note and put it in his robe pocket. ‘They are going to kill her.’

‘Who’s going to kill who?’ Peter asked.

‘My cousin Andromeda has eloped with a  muggle-born. ’

Sirius shook his head in disbelief, but despite his statement that “they” (presumably his family) would kill Andromeda, he didn’t seem overly concerned. Once the shock had settled, he seemed amused by it all ('I knew she had it in her!').

‘James…?’ Remus asked.

James hadn’t said a word since he’d gone over to scan Sirius’ letter.

Sirius turned to look at his best friend: ‘what on earth is the matter with you? Do you know this Tonks bloke?’

‘It’s your birthday,’ James said slowly.

‘What?’ Peter exclaimed.

Sirius shrugged: 'so?'

‘Happy birthday,’ Remus offered and Peter repeated the wish.

While Remus wished he’d gotten Sirius a card or something, he also realised that this was irrational. Sirius had kept his birthday from them most likely because he didn’t want anyone making a fuss. Next year they’d have to figure out what to do now that they knew (whatever else Sirius might want), but for this year, they were at least off the hook.

James looked genuinely hurt: ‘why didn’t you tell us?!’

‘It’s not a big deal,’ Sirius said, looking like he regretted not shielding his letter from James in the first place.

‘Where are your presents?’ James asked looking around and ignoring Sirius' remark.

Sirius laughed: ‘if I’m lucky, I get a note from Regulus, should he work up the courage. I’m in Gryffindor - there’s no way my family would have sent me anything.’

‘You’ve got to be kidding?!’ James said looking crestfallen. ‘No presents on your birthday.’

‘Are you really that surprised?’ Sirius asked, now looking distinctly annoyed. ‘Merlin, I’ve been telling you about my family for months. The fact that we’re even friends - that I’m friends with any of you - is… you know what, never mind, sod this.’

And with that Sirius stalked out of their dormitory.

/

Remus couldn't tell whether James and Sirius were in fact now in an argument or not. They all caught up with Sirius at breakfast, and Sirius and James sat together in Transfiguration and Charms, and worked together in Herbology. They spoke freely to each other and if Remus hadn't seen the boys together for two whole months now, he might have believed everything was normal. But they were acting differently. James did not behave in his usually restless manner and Sirius didn't look half as bored as he usually did. 

At lunch, James wolfed down his food and hurried off mumbling something none of the boys could discern. 

'Wanna bet he's fixing his looks before Defence Against the Dark Arts?' Sirius said, with a forced air of normality. 'His hair might be a lost cause, but I am not sure the git has ever tried his father's potion.'

But James wasn't in Defence Against the Dark Arts. If it had been any other class, Remus wouldn't have thought much of it, but James had so far been unusually, though not surprisingly, well-behaved in Madame Maxwell's classes. 

By the time James didn't show up to Potions, Remus was starting to feel worried. So, he suspected, was Sirius.

It didn't help that Avery, Mulciber and Snape kept throwing remarks Sirius' way that he had lost his shadow with such glee that Sirius' hands shook as he was trying to slice his horned slug: 'If they have touched as much as one messy hair on James' head, I swear I will hex nails into every cell... in every limb... of their pathetic... rotten... bodies.'

They didn't discuss it, but it seemed to be agreed that they would check the Hospital Wing on the way back to the common room. Remus wasn't particularly happy to be back so soon, and tried to hide behind his two friends, hoping Madam Pomfrey wouldn't assume he was here because of "his condition". James was not there.

Half worried, half annoyed that James was nowhere to be found - and in Remus' case, also extremely tired - the three headed back to their common room. 

'When I find James, I am going to beat the living crap out of him,' Sirius said as they made their way up to their dormitory to drop off their school books. 

While Remus wasn't entirely sure he agreed with Sirius' plan, Remus agreed that he felt it insensitive of James to have done... whatever he had done. Some birthday Sirius was having. 

'What in Merlin's name...' 

Sirius had been the first to open the door, followed by Remus and Peter. 

Remus stopped dead.

On Sirius' bed lay what felt like about a hundred small presents.

'SURPRISE!' 

James had come out from nowhere and half-tackled, half-hugged Sirius.

'James, you utter git, what did you do all that for?' Sirius said, pushing away his friend, but looking relieved. 

'You needed presents!' James said, dragging Sirius over to his bed.

'Not a whole shop's worth!'

'Two shops worth,' James grinned, then his smile fell a little: 'They're not... I am afraid they're nothing special. But there are a lot of presents!'

'Where did you get all of this?' Sirius asked, curious, as he bent down to open a small, wrapped, box.

'Well, you'll see, won't you!'

/

'This is brilliant!' Sirius exclaimed a little later as he unwrapped the second box of Dungbombs. 'James, this is going to be perfect leading up to the Christmas break!'

'I know!' James agreed. 

It turned out that the presents from James contained mostly sweets from a shop called Honeydukes and various joke items from another store called Zonko's. Now they knew where James had been during their lessons.

'We should find out where the entrance to the Slytherin common room is, and set these off in the corridors just outside,' James suggested.

'No, what we should really do is find out their password and set one off under Snivellus' bed,' Sirius grinned.

They really shouldn't do either, Remus thought, but he feared both were likely to happen.

Only after all the presents had been opened, and James, Sirius, Peter and Remus had eaten enough sweets that nobody felt like going down to dinner (no - tea, Remus quickly amended), did Sirius broach the subject that Remus had been curious about. Not that Remus would ever have raised it, out of consideration for both his friends.

'You're a prat, you know that,' Sirius said to James.

James spluttered: 'What have I done?!'

'This must have been all your savings!'

'Nah, only this year's. The rest dad put into Gringotts - I couldn't get to it if I had wanted to.'

That was probably a good thing, Remus thought, looking at the pile of items now strewn on the floor to make space for all four boys in Sirius' bed.

'Still, that's a stupid way to spend your money. What if you need something?' 

'If I need something, mum and dad will buy it for me,' James shrugged. 'It's my money, and I can do what I want with it.'

And what James had wanted was to cheer up his friend, that much was obvious.

'It was your money, you moron,' Sirius corrected, but left the conversation at that.

Astronomy that night was awful, as the four boys felt the effects of the sugar leave their bodies just as the class was about to begin. Remus, who knew he could probably give the class a miss, all things considered, was nevertheless glad to be there. He would never be able to see the full moon, so days like today were the closest he'd ever get.

/

Sometimes, Sirius and James got away with things they really shouldn’t have gotten away with. Other times, albeit far less commonly, the punishment outweighed the crime. This felt to Remus like one of those rare latter cases.

Professor McGonagall was furious to learn that James had skived off lessons for a full afternoon, especially when she found out that he had done so to sneak into Hogsmeade (though how she found out about that, Remus didn’t know). She gave him detentions every Saturday until the Christmas break, including, to James’ horror, the upcoming Saturday when Gryffindor was playing Hufflepuff. This did not impress Fabian Prewett. The Gryffindor Quidditch captain had taken James aside and told him in no uncertain terms that he was disappointed, and that he expected more from his reserve. James seemed to take this talking to especially to heart as Fabian had apparently expressed regret over having helped James only a few days earlier in Hogsmeade.

To add insult to injury, James' parents, having learned about what he had done from McGonagall, decided to withhold his pocket money for November and December. Remus didn’t get pocket money and usually he would have considered the punishment rather lenient. Especially as most students who were unlucky enough to have letters sent home to their parents received a Howler. As far as Remus could tell, there were few cross words from Mr and Mrs Potter in their letter to their son. However, James had spent every bit of the money he could access trying to make his best friend feel celebrated on his birthday, and Remus couldn’t help but think that McGonagall and James’ parents might have felt differently had they known the full truth.

But Remus had enough to worry about without worrying about James' many detentions and lack of pocket money. There was the school work which kept getting harder - but also more interesting - and of course catching up on the latest set of lessons he had missed. Then there was the case of his two other friends. Neither Peter nor Sirius looked particularly happy when the Christmas break was brought up in conversation, even though the holiday was still two months away. 

With everything Remus was learning about the Blacks, he couldn’t say he blamed Sirius in the slightest for wanting to think as little as possible about the upcoming break. In fact, the picture he was putting together from what Sirius was willing to share, Remus really did worry about his friend’s home situation. But there was only so much Remus could do. What Sirius didn’t share was impossible to get out of him even if he’d tried. And Remus didn’t try - after all he of all people could understand the desire to keep things from one's friends.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Alice Fawley, are you out of your bloody mind?' 

Fabian had been quiet all morning, and Gideon knew the nerves of the upcoming match that day - Fabian's first as captain - were strong. Merlin, Gideon wasn't even sure when he himself had last felt so nervous. In fact, until his brother's surprised exclamation, Gideon had been certain nothing could distract him from his worries about the match, and more importantly, about Fabian. But then he turned and saw Alice.

Merlin.

Gideon had believed he was in love with Alice - hating the idea, knowing she could never feel the same - but now he was convinced he had been mistaken. Nothing compared to the way he now felt watching Alice. She was blushing slightly as she received glances from both her own table and Gryffindor's, making her way towards them with a Gryffindor banner draped around her waist. Merlin's everything. Everything about her—her warm eyes, her round and gorgeous face, her smile, wide yet vulnerable - made Alice the most beautiful creature on this planet. 

Gideon loved her. He fucking loved her! He was in love with her.

He didn't want this. It seemed like a cruel trick of fate that he should fall for the one friend he could not bear to lose. Their friendship was something he couldn't risk.

'Hiya,' Alice said brightly and sat down next to Gideon. 'Good weather today - excellent Quidditch conditions!'

Gideon couldn't remember if he would usually have hugged Alice before his feelings had taken this most unwelcome turn, and therefore whether he could put his arm around her now? He dearly wanted to. Would it be weird if he did? Would it be weird if he didn't? 

'You know which house the sorting hat put you in, don't you?' Fabian teased.

He had waited too long. It was too late for Gideon to put his hand around her now. For Merlin's sake, why hadn't he just done it earlier?

'Slytherin, yes I remember,' Alice said, rolling her eyes.

Gideon should say something - funny, preferably - but he couldn't. Fabian would be able to tell exactly how much Gideon was struggling, and that made the whole thing even worse. He could practically feel his brother restraining himself from rolling his eyes. 

'What is your brother's view on you turning traitor?' Fabian asked.

'"About bloody time", I think was his exact wording.'

'And Amelia and the rest of the girls?' Gideon finally managed to ask.

'They don't mind! They get it. They know I love you two and this is your first match as captain, Fabian. Big day!'

She loved them! 

Of course she did, don't be an idiot, that doesn't mean shit, a stern voice told Gideon. She loved him, and she loved Fabian, and probably regarded them both as brothers. 

Fabian grimaced, and Gideon mentally pulled himself together. This wasn't about him. This was a big day for Fabian. Just as Alice had said.

'You'll do fab, Fab!'

'Merlin, I thought we were done with that nonsense,' Fabian said, shaking his head but smiling at Alice.

'You too, Gid,' Alice continued.

'Thanks, Alice,' Gideon said, and deciding to throw some caution to the wind, he pulled her into a hug.

/

'And the Quaffle is taken immediately by Ciara Ryan of Gryffindor - the only player except the Prewett brothers to have played for the team before - who passes it to newcommer Tiberius McLaggen - a decent player I've been told, but - no.'

There was a groan from the Gryffindors as Tiberius McLaggen aimed at the goal post to the left - too far away in Gideon's view - and missed.

'It seems like McLaggen's ego has followed him onto the Quidditch pitch. He should have passed the Quaffle back to Ryan, who was much better positioned, but nevermind - Lianne Diggory of Hufflepuff has the Quaffle - she passes it to Florence Macmillan who only made the team last year after her brother was made captain - back to Diggory and - OUCH - that must have hurt, hit in the back of the head by a Bludger from Gideon Prewett - another player to benefit from having a brother as captain. McLaggen now in possession - let's hope he has learned from his past mistakes - and yes, he passes it to Jenny Robins.'

Gideon had been sorely tempted to send the Bludger Bertha Jorkins' way, but thinking back to when Rabastan Lestrange had been commentating, Gideon reminded himself that it could have been worse. At least Jorkins was equally horrible to her own house as she seemed to be to Hufflepuff, if that was a consolation to be had. 

Ciara Ryan was the first to score and the Gryffindors roared their approval. Looking at the stands, he could just make out the polite applause from the rest of the audience. Hufflepuffs rarely moaned or booed, as long as the game remained clean.

'Robins, watch out!' Fabian called as Matthew Hopkirk sent a Bludger after her. If Gideon hadn't been looking at the stands, he should have been able to have intercepted that Bludger, but luckily, Jenny dodged it, however, sadly dropping the Quaffle at the same time.

'Sorry,' she called after Fabian as she shot towards the Gryffindor goal posts, chasing Lianne Diggory, who passed the Quaffle to a small boy Gideon hadn't seen before.

'Never apologise,' Fabian shouted back as he pelted a Bludger after the boy to impede his progress. 

'Diggory passes to David Davies, who is the last chaser to get possession of the Quaffle in this game - not surprisingly as this is his first match, only a second year - and - Merlin, that does not stop Fabian Prewett from nearly breaking his arm - that must have been extremely painful! No mercy from the Lions today.'

Gideon swore loudly, but no one could hear him. He couldn't see Fabian's face, but as David Davies nearly slid off his broom, Gideon knew Fabian was anxious about what he might have done to the boy. 

It was their job to send Bludgers after opposing players and injuring people was just something they had to accept. But it wasn't fun when it was a serious injury - especially if the player was young. Most teams, Slytherin excluded, seemed to follow the etiquette of being gentler on the second year students. That didn't stop accidents from happening.

'So for now it seems like only the seekers are actually bothering to play...' Bertha Jorkins complained. 'No, I am wrong, Frederick Macmillan has also decided to join the drama rather than do his job as a seeker - this might be Norman McLaggen's chance at catching the snitch. From what I've heard he's unlikely to get it if he faces any competition. Actually, come to think of it, we may be here for a while, with two of the worst seekers in the history-'

'That's enough, Jorkins,' McGonagall's voice interrupted.

Jenny Robins had been the first to reach David Davies, and she helped him stay on the broom. Florence Macmillan was the first Hufflepuff to reach Davies, and then the two captains were also by Davies' side. After a few minutes, game play continued. Even David Davies continued playing.

'He'll be bruised, but he's alright,' Fabian shouted to Gideon quickly, as the two had both flown towards the same Bludger.

For a while it seemed like Bertha Jorkins' prediction about the match going on for a long time would hold true. Gryffindor was leading hundred-and-thirty to fourty, the Gryffindor chasers being exactly as good as Fabian had been convinced they were. Sadly, Davies sore arm likely made the game even more uneven. Gideon feared, however, that Fabian had been just as right about his assessment of Norman McLaggen's inability to catch the Snitch.

Just then, Gideon was following his brother, and Jenny, on the right side of the pitch, as the two of them rapidly advanced towards the goal posts. Fabian was on the left, hot on the tails of Ciara, who had the Quaffle and passed it to Jenny.

'Robins in possession, she passes to McLaggen - not sure that was wise - but then again - YES - Gryffindor scores as Marshall Fawley continues to prove his inability to block the goalposts. Gryffindor a hundred points in the lead.'

'I paid her well to trash talk you,' Gideon shouted to Marshall, wanting desperately to send a Bludger Jorkins' way. 

Until Fabian had become unwell, it was Marshall Gideon had been closest to, and in many ways they had been a group of four. But the year when Marshall had gone off to Hogwarts, and Alice and Gideon had stayed put by Fabian's bedside had cemented a friendship between the three, which Marshall never managed to enter.

It was also an entirely unjust assertion that Marshall was a poor Keeper. The Gryffindor chasers were just too good, Ciara Ryan being the strongest, having scored seven of the goals so far, and been instrumental to almost all the other goals. 

'I am not sure you're getting your Sickles worth,' Marshall replied, grinning. 

'I CAN'T BELIEVE IT - MACMILLAN HAS CAUGHT THE SNITCH!'

'WHAT?!' 

This from both Gideon and Marshall, and they looked at each other in complete astonishment. There had been no chase, no warning, and just like that, Hufflepuff had won the game. 

Shit!

The stadium erupted in cheers (and some groans from the Gryffindors). Marshall thrust his fist in the air, a cry of joy escaping him, but Gideon had eyes for one player only.

Gryffindor had lost against what had been considered the weakest line-up of the year. They had lost against a team they had never lost to as long as Gideon and Fabian had been on the team. This would kill Fabian, who would undoubtedly assume all the responsibility.

Fabian, however, seemed determined to keep it together and do his duty as a captain. He was already flying towards the Hufflepuff seeker to congratulate him. 

'He'll be alright.'

Gideon turned to see Marshall also looking after Fabian.

'It's just a game, Gid.'

'Yeah, congrats Marshall,' Gideon said, hearing the lack of conviction in his voice.

'Well, Jorkins' made it very clear it wasn't due to my efforts,' Marshall said, but as usual there was neither bitterness or self-pity in the voice. He sounded amused, more than anything. 'C'mon, let's find my sister and shame her for having chosen to abandon her house allegiance at the wrong time.'

'I'll catch you later,' Gideon said, not really listening to Marshall, and turning his broom to catch his brother. 

'No mate, I am coming with you,' Marshall's voice came out from behind. 'If I am going to have any chance of catching Alice, I am going to have to stay close to you and Fabian.'

/

Gideon was vaguely aware that Marshall had said something about teasing Alice about her Gryffindor banner, so he was relieved to see that Marshall didn’t go there. Not because Alice couldn’t take it - Merlin, she could take anything - but because, as the four made their way up to the castle, Gideon could see how bothered Fabian was about it all.

‘We better take this off you,’ Fabian said defeatedly, moving to remove the banner around Alice as they were about to enter the Great Hall.

‘Fabian, don’t be a prat,’ Alice said, moving quickly away. ‘I’m not going to suddenly change my “allegiance” or whatever you guys see this as, just because you lost. What in Merlin’s name would that make me?’

‘These Lions have no sense of honour,’ Marshall said, shaking his head.

Fabian didn’t seem to have any sense of anything as he looked through the open doors.

‘Do you think I spent enough time with the team?’ He asked suddenly turning to Gideon.

‘They were all keen to get away, mate. Tomorrow is better. Let it sink in.’

Fabian still didn't make a move to enter the Great Hall.

‘Come on,’ Alice said, taking Fabian’s arm and dragging him inside.

‘Today we’re having dinner in the Lion’s den,’ she then told her brother.

‘I finally win against the Lions and I don’t even get to celebrate,’ Marshall said shaking his head, but he didn’t even glance at his table as he took the seat next to Gideon.

Alice, sitting next to Fabian, put the banner across both their backs, like a blanket of sorts, and started filling his plate with food for him.

/

‘Congratulations Fawley,’ a voice called out a little later and Gideon looked up to find Owen Redpath approaching the table.

‘Thanks Redpath,’ Marshall said good-naturedly.

‘As for your chasers,’ Redpath said, turning to Fabian, ‘Regina is not looking forward to facing them.’

Fabian smiled weakly at his friend.

Redpath hesitated for a moment, then leaned in closer: ‘Listen, I talked to Jenny Robins just now. If I were you, I’d speak to her about some... er... restructuring. She has an idea that might work.’

Then he straightened up: ‘just remember that I helped you, when you beat us and eventually go on to become a famous Quidditch star.’

‘He knows I’m planning on becoming an Auror, right?’ Fabian said after Redpath had left. 

Right, Gideon thought. He certainly tried to forget Fabian had a death wish.

‘Are we sure he’s a Ravenclaw?’ Marshall asked, ‘if he just helped you before his own match against you, he’s a real idiot.’

Gideon and Alice exchanged a quick look. They both had their own theories for why Redpath might have wanted to help, but neither said anything. 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had watched the match between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, and with Sirius and Peter’s help, he finally grasped the rules of the game. As he had started to suspect he might, he found himself enjoying it, cheering on the Gryffindor chasers as they built up a strong lead. He even found himself groaning loudly along with his friends and the rest of the Gryffindors at the abrupt and unfavourable finish to the match.

Later, Sirius provided James with a detailed breakdown of the match over dinner (no, tea). James looked as distraught as the rest of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

‘Fabian wants to speak to all of us tomorrow,’ James said, defeatedly. ‘Can’t imagine it will be much fun.’

‘More fun than pickling rats brains, surely?’ Sirius asked.

‘I forgot that was what I was meant to be doing today,’ James said, ‘Horace and I spent the afternoon talking about Sarah and Alex.’

Sirius snorted.

Of course they had, Remus thought. Very few bad things seemed to happen to James Potter. Then he felt a bit guilty. James had just told him he’d spent the afternoon talking about his dead cousin. But if this had bothered James, he didn’t show it.

/

In the end, there came one very good thing out of the loss against Hufflepuff.

‘I MADE THE TEAM!!!!’ James shouted (quite unnecessarily) across the dormitory.

‘YOU MADE THE TEAM!!!!’ Sirius shouted back.

‘HE’S MADE THE TEEEEAAAAM!’ They shouted together.

Alright - there were still some things Remus didn’t quite understand about friendships, like needlessly shouting stuff.

‘What team?’ Peter asked, looking confused between the two of them.

‘I swear to Merlin you’ve got dragon dungs for brains, Pete,’ Sirius said, ‘the Quidditch team, you git. Right, James?’

Peter looked stung. Remus wasn’t sure if Sirius and James realised that they could be hurtful to their friend. Friends, Remus corrected. They could be hurtful to him too. The thing was that if Sirius called James stupid, it was clear to everyone that it wasn’t true. James and Sirius were so easily the best at everything they did. Calling Peter the same was different.

‘Yes!’ James said eagerly. ‘Turns out Jenny is not a bad seeker, she just doesn’t like it as much as playing chaser. But who cares about that! She’s going to step in for McClaggen and I’m going to be taking her spot as chaser!’

‘How did Norman McLaggen take that?’ Remus asked, feeling curious.

‘Who cares,’ Sirius said, dismissively. ‘I’m more interested in how Tiberius might have taken it, seeing as you will still be playing with him.’

‘Oh he doesn’t care. Says if Norman wanted to stay on the team he should have played better.’

For some reason, Peeves also found the news of James becoming a chaser shout-worthy. On Monday, Peeves took to following James about the castle as he cackled happily:

'Ickle Jaime Potty is on the lion’s team;
For now he’s happy, it’s all like a dream;
But Ravens claw and Snakes scheme;
Poor ickle Potty, it ended in a scream.'

But rather than being particularly upset by this, James, accompanied by Sirius, started making sounds to go with the rhyme: a lion’s roar, the slashing of claws, the hissing of a snake and a scream. Peeves started making room for James and Sirius' additions, and by the end of the day Peeves, James and Sirius had added a dance routine - of sorts.

This display seemed to vex the Slytherin first years in particular, and not entirely to Remus’ surprise, none more so than Severus Snape. Luckily, James and Sirius had indeed become good with their wands and were able to defend most assaults from the boy, but Remus hadn’t exactly forgotten Sirius’ injured shoulder. Remus felt it inevitable that at one point, James and Sirius would be caught off guard.

There were some close attempts. Once, Snape dropped his knife “accidentally” during Potions, so as to fall on James foot. James was quick, however, to move out of the way, and Sirius picked up the knife and dropped it in Snape’s cauldron, destroying both the potion and the knife.

The second attempt landed Remus in considerably more trouble than he’d have liked. Snape hit James with a well-aimed, and unexpected, tripping jinx. Unlike James’ attempts, Snape seemed to have no issue trying to aim these when James or Sirius were at the top of the stairs. For a terrible moment, Remus watched as James lost his footing and toppled forward, but Sirius had reflexes that nearly rivalled their friend and though nearly losing his balance in the process, he managed to catch and steady James.

Remus, looking around to see who had caused the incident (knowing already that it must have been Snape), saw Snape aim his wand once more at the two boys, neither who would have had any chance to defend themselves. Remus didn’t like the look in those cold eyes, and without thinking he cried: ‘Expelliarmus.’

It was the first time Remus had disarmed an actual opponent, but that success did not quite make up for the detention Remus was given as professor Flitwick had chosen that very moment to make an appearance.

Neither Sirius nor James seemed at all apologetic for the incident (neither seeming to take detentions very hard), but their gratitude was evident. Sirius had gotten some snacks from the kitchen for Remus to enjoy once he returned from his detentions and James had offered to (and frustratingly quickly did) review Remus’ homework that week. Neither James nor Sirius got as much positive feedback on their homework as Remus did, but Remus had learned by now that this was due to their (lack of) effort. Nobody was better placed than the two to actually catch any mistakes he might have made.

‘I don’t know why you bother,’ Sirius had told Remus only the previous evening, as he and James played Exploding Snap while Peter and Remus sat bent over their homework. ‘There was no requirement on how long that essay had to be, so just answer the question briefly. It’d take you about five minutes.’

All Sirius' homework seemed to take about five minutes.

/

Sirius was quick to get himself caught setting off multiple Dungbombs around the castle, ending up in detentions with James every Saturday until the break. At first, Remus was surprised by the decision to pair the two boys together, as he felt it reduced the punishment for both. Then he learned that Peter, still unbeknownst to the two others as far as Remus knew, had found professor McGonagall and told her the full story of why James had been to Hogsmeade.

Remus wasn’t sure what he felt about Peter’s action. He had meant well, that much was obvious. But James hadn’t shared his motivation with professor McGonagall and Sirius had made the decision not to tell her either. It was neither Remus’ nor Peter’s place to do anything about the detentions.

As November continued to progress, the weather kept getting colder, and one morning in the last week of that month, the boys woke up to discover the castle grounds covered in several feet of snow. While the change of weather was preferred to the wet storms that had tormented them practically since the start of term, it came with a few caveats. The Gryffindor common room and the Great Hall might have had roaring fires to keep everyone warm, but the draughty corridors had become icy and a bitter wind rattled the windows in the classrooms. 

Despite the chilly weather, however, the only thing that was on anyone's mind that first morning they found the grounds covered in snow was getting through the classes so that they could go out and enjoy it. Even James was persuaded not to fly that afternoon. Instead, Sirius, James, Peter and Remus went outside to build snow-fortresses. Joined unexpectedly by a group of Ravenclaws who Sirius and James were quick to invite to join their fun, they launched into a snowball fight: Eagles vs Lions. While the fight was fairly even as long as magic wasn’t involved, the Gryffindors gained a considerable (and questionable) advantage when Sirius and James decided to draw on magic to throw more balls at their opponents.

But aside from that one afternoon, it was now difficult to get James to do anything that didn’t involve flying as long as there was daylight. Learning that he had made the team seemed to have lit a fire in him that even Sirius couldn’t dampen. Eventually, Sirius gave up on trying to fly with his friend on all occasions, something he had taken to doing ever since they had learned about the challenges with the school brooms.

/

On the night leading to December 1st, Remus awoke once more to a body that was aching as yet another full moon was approaching. This time, however, he had some draughts from Madam Pomfrey that he knew would help him sleep and manage his pain. He opened his bed-hangings, intending to get the vials when he noticed that Peter’s bed was empty. Looking at his watch, he saw that it was two in the morning.

This was highly unusual. Even James and Sirius were asleep. What on earth could have happened?

Remus tried to remember back to the previous day. Had Peter been showing signs of being unwell? Remus couldn’t tell, he’d been too concerned pretending he wasn’t getting worse. Maybe Peter had been a bit quiet - even for him.

Remus got up to check the bathroom, but there was no one there. Most likely Peter had gone to the Hospital Wing (and Remus wished he’d woken one of them to accompany him), but even so, Remus couldn’t help leave the dormitory to check the common room.

To his surprise, he found Peter curled up in an armchair by the fireplace. The fire had died out but there were still a few glowing embers, which allowed Remus to spot his friend. He had thought the boy might be asleep, but when he approached the chair, Peter sat up.

‘Remus…’

‘Hi Pete, are you alright?’

‘Sure. What are you doing here?’

‘Looking for you. I’m not sure we’re allowed to be down here this late.’

Peter shrugged. He seemed more distant than Remus had seen the small boy so far. Now that he was closer, Remus could see that Peter eyes were red, even in the near darkness.

‘What’s wrong?’ Remus said, before he could stop himself.

Remus wanted to respect people’s privacy. But it felt sometimes like it was his job to look after his friends, especially Peter. Sometimes, he supposed, people wanted someone to push, even if they didn't know it. 

‘Is it about your dad?’

Peter nodded.

‘It’s silly,’ he said apologetically.

‘It’s not silly!’ Remus protested. Merlin, Remus couldn’t imagine anything worse than losing either of his parents.

‘It will be the first Christmas without him,’ Peter sniffed as new tears rolled down his cheeks.

‘Oh…’

Poor Peter! What on earth could Remus say to make him feel better?

‘That… that must be really tough.’

‘It’s just going to be everything… y’know? All these reminders that he’s not here anymore.’

‘Hm…’ Remus said, wishing he could think of something better to say.

‘And I just got thinking today… about…’ Peter seemed a bit embarrassed, ‘about the presents, which will say “from mum” and not…’

Not “from mum and dad.”

‘It’s stupid.’

It wasn’t stupid.

Wondering what kind of bad influence his friends were having on him, as he didn’t see himself as one to break rules nor did he have any desire beyond going back to bed, he suggested, 'How about a trip to the kitchen? Since neither of us can get any sleep.'

Peter smiled at the suggestion. Though he looked a bit nervous, he also looked excited at the prospect of a late night adventure to the kitchen. He wiped his tears with his pyjama sleeves and nodded.

The feeling of being helpful - of reducing someone else’s pain - filled Remus with such joy that he decided risk and rest be damned.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

‘You’ve got to be kidding?!’

‘You two got detentions?’

‘The two of you were sneaking out at night?’

‘Without us?!’

James and Sirius were in absolute shock the following day. It would have been funny - except with only one more night before the full moon (and their escapade the night before) Remus was absolutely exhausted. His eyelids were heavy, and he felt disorientated, relying entirely on his friends to navigate their way to Transfiguration that morning.

‘No reason to look so worried, Remus,’ Sirius said as they made their way to professor McGonagall's classroom.

‘Nah, this is brilliant!’ James agreed.

‘We knew you two had it in you,’ Sirius said. ‘Somewhere…’

Peter looked pleased at the boys’ excitement, so Remus felt that their adventure hadn’t been entirely wasted. However, the guilt of seeing the disappointed look on professor McGonagall’s face when they were brought to her office just a few hours earlier had lingered unpleasantly. The last thing he wanted was to see her again so soon.

Remus sank into a chair at the back of the classroom, trying his best to disappear. Merlin, what a relief it would be when this day was over.

/ 

Remus left for the Hospital Wing that afternoon, informing his friends that, once again, his mother was unwell.

The best thing that could be said for the early December full moon was that it was the last before Remus would return home to his family. While the prospect of seeing his mother and father filled him with joy, it was somewhat tempered by the knowledge that his next transformation would take place at home. Unlike Madam Pomfrey, who could provide ample care following his transformations, Lyall wasn't nearly as good a healer. Nonetheless, the longing to be reunited with his parents grew stronger with each passing day. The mere thought of being able to curl up on the sofa from the first sign of the moon's effects, without having to pretend everything was normal (that he was normal), made the last few weeks feel like they dragged on forever.

There was, however, never a chance to get bored at Hogwarts. At least not if two of your friends were James Potter and Sirius Black.

It happened on the Sunday a week before the break. 

Sirius, Peter and Remus were eating lunch in the Great Hall. James was taking advantage of the little daylight that still existed to fly on one of the school brooms. Remus couldn't fathom how James managed to keep up his motivation in this weather.

'I still think we should have waited,' Sirius said, glowering distastefully at his food, as if it was the food that had convinced Sirius not to wait. 'The Hufflepuffs are starting their practice now, so James is bound to call it a day.'

'He told us not to wait, Sirius,' Remus said, only half-heartedly trying to reason with his friend. If they had waited, Sirius would have complained about that too. 

If Remus' first impression of Sirius had been that he was unpleasant, he had mostly been proven wrong. However, with the approaching Christmas break, and the prospect of having to return to his family, Sirius had become increasingly fouled-tempered. James' approach was largely to ignore his friend's bad mood, but Remus could tell it got to James. Peter had mostly stopped talking to Sirius altogether, in fear of saying the wrong thing. As for Remus, well, he seemed to fluctuate between James' approach and Peter's, finding both had their advantages.

'Are you sure about the Hufflepuffs?' Peter asked, tentatively, looking petrified. It was the first words Peter had spoken to Sirius that day, and some of the few he had said all week.

''Course I am bloody sure,' Sirius snapped. But Remus, who sat next to Peter and therefore also had a view of the door, had seen what Peter had seen. 

Macmillan, the Hufflepuff Quidditch Captain, had just entered the Great Hall. 

'I don't know, Sirius,' Remus said nodding towards the door, 'surely Macmillan would be at practice?'

Sirius turned to see Macmillan enter, and stiffened.

Macmillan hurried past the Slytherin and Ravenclaw table, turning in between the Hufflepuff and Gryffindor tables. What caught Remus's attention was that Macmillan was wearing his Quidditch gear, which seemed odd if they didn't have practice or it had been cancelled.

Sirius cursed under his breath. 

Macmillan had not turned to sit down at the Hufflepuff table. Instead he had approached Fabian Prewett, who after exchanging a few words with Macmillan stood up. Sirius stood up too. 

Remus knew what Sirius feared in that moment, but he wasn't ready to read anything more into the exchange than two captains meeting to talk about something Quidditch-related. But then Prewett saw Sirius and rather than turning to walk out the way Macmillan had come, Prewett and Macmillan made their way to Sirius and the rest. 

'Potter's okay,' Prewett said before Sirius had even opened his mouth. 'He's being brought to Madam Pomfrey. There was an accident, but nothing to worry about. I am going up now to check on him, I assume you want to come?'

From everything Remus knew about Sirius, he thought that was a fair assumption to make. Remus and Peter got up as well, and the four plus Macmillan made their way out of the Great Hall. 

Once outside, Macmillan excused himself: 'I've got to get back to practice, Fabian, but Marshall insisted on staying with Potter.' 

'What happened?' Sirius asked Prewett as they made their way to the Hospital Wing. He looked angry, and Remus hoped he wasn't about to start shouting at James again when he saw him, although a small part of Remus too wanted to shout at their friend. 

'Honestly, we don't really know,' Prewett said. 'They found him unconscious by the goal posts.'

Remus noticed Sirius' fists tightening and he felt his own stomach churn uncomfortably. That didn't sound good.

Maybe noticing their reactions, Prewett continued quickly: 'He's okay. He came around quickly with their help, but he doesn't remember much. Macmillan reckons it's those damn school brooms. They're no good in windy conditions like these. I bet he's right. Merlin, I've been an idiot letting him - but what's done is done.'  

Remus could barely take his eyes of Sirius as they continued walking: somehow Sirius had known this would happen. He'd been on the alert ever since the previous accident. Although Remus had got the impression that Sirius had relaxed, joined - and even enjoyed - some rather deadly (in Remus' view) stunts, it seemed that Sirius had never quite shaken off his fear. Otherwise, how could he have clocked so quickly that something was wrong? 

They all filed into the Hospital Wing after Prewett. It felt both better and worse to see James than Remus had feared. James was lying in a bed, his eyes closed but his glasses on. When they entered, he opened his eyes to look at them. There were no signs of injury, so if his head injury - or any other injury he might have had - had left any visible signs, Madam Pomfrey had healed those. Remus knew better than most how capable the matron was. Yet, James seemed weary and somehow out of it, and Remus really wasn't used to seeing James like that.

Next to James' bed sat a seventh year Remus recognised as the keeper of the Hufflepuff Quidditch team. He got up and Sirius quickly took his chair, while Remus and Peter walked around the bed and sat down on James' other side.

Prewett thanked the Hufflepuff keeper, who didn't leave except to find Madam Pomfrey. None of the boys said a word. It felt like an unspoken agreement that Prewett was in charge.

'I need to speak to Potter, will that be alright?' Prewett asked Madam Pomfrey.

'Potter needs rest,' Madam Pomfrey declared, her disapproving gaze sweeping over the group. Remus, who knew the matron rather well by now, decided to look at his hands until this exchange was over. 

'If you must speak with him, do so briefly. However, if Potter shows any signs of becoming more fatigued, you are to cease immediately. And I want you all out of here in half an hour. Is that clear?' 

As with most of Madam Pomfrey's instructions, it left little room for interpretation.

'How are you feeling, Potter?' Prewett asked as he took a chair and sat down next to Sirius. 

'Alright,' James said, looking a bit sheepish.

'A slight headache?' Prewett asked kindly.

'Yeah, a bit,' James agreed, nodding and then grimacing. 

Fabian seemed slightly humoured: 'take it from me, I've had a few Bludgers to the head in my time, don't nod or shake your head today.'

James seemed about to nod again. Hesitating (now that nodding was out of the question), James looked a bit lost for what to do or say.

‘Listen,’ Prewett said, looking serious, ‘I am the first to applaud the dedication you’re showing the team, but what you did, flying on those brooms alone, was really reckless. If the Hufflepuffs hadn’t had their practice, its odds on you'd be dead by the time someone found you. It's dangerous, lying in the cold like that even without a head injury.’

Remus felt a shiver run down his spine. It wasn’t the first time Sirius and James had been rather careless with their lives, but that didn’t mean he got used to it. Just like that and James might have been dead.

There was a part of Remus that was angry with the two of them. They had normal - healthy - lives. Yet, both Sirius and James seemed to have this belief that everything would turn out alright. That no damage was irreversible. Remus knew so much better.

‘I’m sorry,’ James said, and he looked it.

Remus knew James well enough by now to know that whatever guilt he felt now or scare he might have had, James would quickly forget about it. Even so, Remus' frustration subsided a little. James looked so much younger lying in that bed.

‘No need to apologise to me, Potter. Truth be told, I’m sorry too. I knew - or I suspected, at the very least - that you were putting in extra practice, alone, on those brooms.’

So far, Remus had pegged Fabian Prewett to be a little more like James and Sirius than say his brother, Gideon Prewett, but he realised he might have been mistaken. Fabian seemed to take the situation extremely seriously and was holding himself accountable - a concept Remus wasn't entirely sure James or Sirius understood.

‘But how am I meant to catch up to the rest if I can’t fly outside of team practice?’ James asked.

Prewett smiled: ‘telling you you don’t need to won’t work, I presume?’

‘Nope,’ James and Sirius chorused.

Prewett's smile grew at the reaction from the two boys: 'I suspected as much.'

Seeming to consider the matter, he said: ‘First things first, I won’t hear a word of you practicing anymore before the holidays.’

James looked like someone had cancelled Christmas.

‘It’s not so bad,’ Prewett said, observing James’ expression of horror and disappointment: ‘You’re not out of here for a few days in any case. As for after the break,’ Prewett continued, ‘I think you better just borrow mine or Gideon’s brooms outside of team practice.’

James' mouth fell open.

‘Don’t worry about it,’ Prewett said. ‘I’d rather have a scratch more on a broom than finding you in here again.’

Or worse, Remus' mind added unbiddenly.

‘And,' Prewett hesitated slightly before he continued: 'I’d feel better if you didn’t fly alone.’

It was interesting to observe what those words did to Peter and Sirius, Remus thought. Peter looked at the point of interrupting Prewett, and Remus guessed it was to tell him that James had mostly flown with Sirius. Remus, who sat next to Peter, lightly kicked his leg to get his attention and shook his head ever so slightly. Sirius just looked guilty.

‘Use your team mates. Robins would love an opportunity to play more with the Quaffle again, I’m sure. McLaggen is… well, a bit of an idiot, but Ryan likes you.’

‘But how will I get better than them if I practice with them?’ 

The Hufflepuff keeper, who had remained in the Hospital Wing, no doubt waiting for Fabian, seemed to struggle concealing his amusement.

‘Firstly, you’re not meant to beat your team. I’d much prefer it if you put your focus into becoming better than the chasers from the other houses. Secondly, for what it’s worth Potter, I have no doubt you will beat all of them in time. You just need a little bit of patience alongside your practice, that’s all. I know that’s hard - trust me - I get it.’

James appeared unconvinced but he also seemed to grow more tired. Prewett looked like he had noticed that too, but just then, the Hufflepuff keeper spoke up: ‘What about team practice, Fabian? You and Gid both need your brooms for that.’

'Well, the team is around for practice. There have already been a few near incidents and we've kept him alive so far.' Prewett looked like he hated his own words.

'These first year rules are just hopeless,' the keeper said, shaking his head. 'Listen, Potter,' he turned to James, 'you can use my broom for team practice if you want.'

'Really?' James looked astonished. 

As far as Remus knew, James had never spoken to the keeper before that day.

'Marshall, that's not necessary,' Prewett protested quickly.

'Nah, we've beaten you already, what's there to worry about?'

'But what if I damaged your broom?' James seemed torn between his desire to accept the offer and his apprehension about the responsibility.

'Well, I am hoping you're the sort of person who shows a broom the respect it deserves,' the keeper said, smiling at James. 'If it should come down to it, Potter, remember that I too would rather it be an extra scratch or even a new broom than you.'

'Are you sure about this, Marshall?' Prewett asked.

'Yes,' the Hufflepuff keeper confirmed without a moment's hesitation.

'That's very kind,' Prewett said with feeling.

'It is! Thank you, Fawley!' James agreed, looking excited and not at all restful. 

Prewett seemed to pick up on the same, because he said: 'That's sorted then... we shall leave you to it. Boys, I think it's best if you keep it short. I suspect we are almost up on our allotted time.'

Just then, the doors to the Hospital Wing flew open and a sixth year girl who looked a little like Marshall Fawley rushed in, followed by Gideon Prewett.

'Gid said you two were in the Hospital Wing,' the girl said, as Fabian Prewett quickly got up. He and Fawley steered the girl and Gideon Prewett away from James and the others.

'If she'd listened,' Gideon Prewett complained, 'she would have heard that I said you two were okay.'

'So what happened?' the girl pressed, 'why are you here?'

'There was a small accident,' Fabian Prewett said quickly, 'not with us, but with a chaser on the Gryffindor team. If Marshall and the others - well, it doesn't matter. It's all okay, truly... But I think it's best if we leave.'

'Is he alright?' the girl asked.

'He'll be fine,' the Hufflepuff keeper said. 'Get some rest, Potter!' he said before leaving with the girl and Gideon Prewett.

Fabian Prewett returned briefly to James' side to offer him wishes of a speedy recovery, and then it was only Peter, Sirius and Remus left.

'Listen, why don't you get some rest,' Remus said quickly. James was even paler than when they had arrived, and he was squinting more, as if the light was hurting his head. 

'We've still got about five minutes, I reckon,' Sirius said, stubbornly. 

James didn't say anything. He closed his eyes for a few moments, and when he opened them, he showed no signs of giving away his own preferences. Which told Remus that James wanted to rest. As a rule, James didn't argue with Sirius, but he would have argued with Remus.

Luckily, Sirius seemed to pick up on something too. Whether it was how quiet James was or that he too knew James would have argued with Remus if he'd truly wanted them to stay, Remus didn't know.

'Alright, fine,' Sirius sighed. 'Just... just know you're an idiot.'

'Prat,' James murmured back.

'Useless flobberworm.'

'Son of a Banshee.'

Sirius grinned: 'That I am!'

Then Sirius leaned forward and sending the two other boys a murderous look which Remus took to mean don't you dare use this against me or mention it to anyone, Sirius squeezed James' hand: 'get well, mate.'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Maybe it was because they no longer had any homework (now that the Christmas break was approaching) or maybe it was simply that with James in the Hospital Wing Sirius was unusually subdued, but Remus had found more time than he'd expected to think through his first term at Hogwarts. 

These reflections were mostly of the pleasant variety. Remus was happier than he had ever expected he'd be: he had three great friends, he was going to school, learning magic and he was living, under the circumstances, a relatively normal life. Yet, he realised, once more, that the condition which made his life a living nightmare once a month had other consequences on his life. Consequences he hadn't yet been aware of. 

It wasn't the first time he'd experienced this. He was nearly seven before he truly realised how isolated the rest of his life would be. Immediately following the attack, he'd wanted to be alone, too weak physically at first and later just too overwhelmed, to want to have anything to do with anyone but his parents. As he started wanting company, he realised it was something he'd never be able to get. His parents didn't want him to play with other children, which he learned only last year was because they were worried he'd let slip the truth of his condition. Then it was the fact that they had to uproot themselves every time witches and wizards started getting suspicious.  

When he was nine years old and started asking about Hogwarts - a school he had read about in the newspapers father left around - his parents had sat him down and told him he wouldn't be able to go there. That had been the second time the wider implications of his condition were made clear to him. And now, he had found a third.

James and Sirius had a belief in their own ability to tackle everything that was thrown their way. They weren't worried about failing out of school, so they put in as little effort as they could get away with. It wasn't just their talent, they hadn't been told that they could never go here in the first place. Going to Hogwarts had not been an unobtainable dream. To them, it had just been their future. 

The pair didn't worry about risking their lives flying around on dangerous brooms over the Black Lake, because they were confident they would survive (even though, as Remus couldn't quite forget, Sirius nearly hadn't). But that was just it! What had been the consequences Sirius and James had faced? Mostly, their skills and talents had made even the older students take notice of them. They were popular with the Gryffindors in particular, due to their relentless targeting of Slytherin students, and they had some fantastic stories to share. 

With his latest accident, Remus had at first been too worried about James (and a little angry with him) to think about anything other than how James was doing. Later it had occurred to Remus that James now had access to much better brooms for practicing. Even when things nearly went wrong, the end result for his friend turned out more favourable than Remus would have been able to dream of... Although Remus supposed his imagination tended to be more skewed to negative outcomes than the average eleven year old.

Remus held no resentment towards his friends for how life just continued to work out for them. James and Sirius were excessively generous in their friendship, in the ways they knew how to be generous. Sure they could be hurtful, but Remus suspected they didn't realise this. Once they had all become friends, James and Sirius' desire had been to be loyal, to share what they could and to take care of their friends.

Just because Remus didn't carry any resentment, it still hurt to see how things in life seemed to come to those who were willing to take risks. Because who took risks? Those that could afford it. Remus could not afford anything.

/

James returned to school at lunchtime on Tuesday, which considering they had History of Magic in their following lesson, felt almost cruel. Or at least it did, until Remus was reminded that James and Sirius had never paid attention to professor Binns. Being reunited with his best friend, James seemed to be spending the lesson quietly plotting something with Sirius, which Remus later learned was to be their end of term prank. It transpired that Remus had been right in suspecting that James and Sirius would try to set off Dungbombs in the corridors around the Slytherin common room.

'If we are lucky, they give us detentions over the Christmas break so we can't go home!' Sirius said eagerly that evening in the common room.

Aside from the current topic of conversation, it was a properly pleasant evening. Sirius was in a much better mood than he'd been of late, and with no homework the four boys had been playing Exploding Snap. Eventually though, Sirius declared that he was bored of the game, at which point Peter and Remus started playing Wizard Chess while listening to Sirius and James' plans. Peter wasn't as good at the game as Remus (who in turn was neither as good as James nor Sirius), but Remus didn't mind. Until a few months ago he'd only had his father to play with, plus Remus didn't really care so much about the game itself, it just gave him something to do which was normal and shared with others.

'If we are lucky, we don't get caught,' James amended, frowning slightly. 

'Don't tell me you'd rather be with two elderly people doing Merlin-knows-what than exploring the castle uninterrupted? We'd have the whole place to ourselves! No prefects, barely any teachers.'

'Sounds grand, but mum and dad'd be disappointed.'

Sirius made a dismissive sound, but didn't say anything more on the subject. Maybe he, like Remus, was very aware that James was homesick, for all his pretending otherwise.

'Last lesson tomorrow is potions,' Sirius said, thoughtfully.

'That's perfect!' James said enthusiastically.

'I know,' Sirius grinned.

'Why is that perfect?' Peter asked, not taking his eyes from the chessboard and looking stressed.

'Pete, I am impressed!' Sirius said.

That did make Peter lift his gaze, and he looked uncertainly at Sirius as if to understand what he had done to impress him.

'Yeah, we didn't think you could listen and play at the same time!' James added.

Peter coloured slightly, and looked down again. 

'I assume it's "perfect",' Remus said quickly, unable to hide a hint of disapproval in his voice, 'because you are planning to follow the Slytherins after class.'

'See? There's a person who can use his brain,' Sirius said. 'No reason to look so stern Remus, the Slytherins deserve this!'

'And more!' James agreed.

They didn't get it. 

True, Remus had some less than favourable thoughts about their plans with the Slytherins, but it was Peter Remus was thinking about at that moment. They didn't get it and yet it was so incredibly hard for Remus to understand how two so brilliant boys could fail to comprehend how much their words could hurt those they otherwise went out of their way to protect. 

Sirius and James continued plotting, and Remus turned his attention to the game, making one or two deliberate mistakes for Peter to get the upper hand. It was a small gesture, and perhaps not as good as standing up to Sirius and James, but it was something.

James yawned a little later.

'Tired already?' Sirius smirked, though his grey eyes studied James intently. It couldn't be more than eight thirty.

'If you weren't so boring, I'd be wide awake.'

'Oh I am sorry, I'll do better next time, shall I?'

And they were off, throwing insults at one another. But after a few minutes, Sirius declared he was tired (which seemed unlikely), and the two went upstairs to 'have an early night'.

'You know how James and Sirius are best friends,' Peter started, a couple of minutes later.

'Mhm.'

'Well... are we best friends?' Remus looked up to see the boy studying him nervously.

Remus wasn't sure he had ever considered friendships that way. If he ranked the friendships by the amount of time he spent with a person, it would be fair to say that Peter was his best friend. But that felt like a poor metric. Remus felt drawn in by James' energy, Sirius' confidence and Peter's quiet but constant presence. He wasn't sure he was ready to rank the few friendships he had. Yet, studying Peter, he felt the boy needed someone that was more in his corner than the others, and that was what Remus had promised the boy (sort of) in their first week at Hogwarts.

'Of course we are,' he said, smiling at Peter. 

/

Sirius and James did find the entrance to the Slytherin common room the following afternoon, and they set off the last of Sirius' Dungbombs the last morning of the term. Neither boy got their wish, however: They were caught by Filch and given detentions to be served at the start of next term.

They all packed their belongings, Sirius looking like he was considering to set fire to every item he threw haphazardly into his trunk. And suddenly, after weeks of waiting, it seemed time sped up and before Remus knew it, the four boys were onboard the Hogwarts Express again. This time, however, they were all in a compartment of their own, and headed for London.

It was a relatively subdued atmosphere as the nature became less wild, and the train started passing muggle villages with increasingly regular intervals. Sirius and James were playing Wizard Chess, Peter was looking out of the train window and Remus was reading A History of Magic. 

While the book was interesting, Remus couldn't help looking up at Sirius and James from time to time. The idea of the two of them spending any length of time away from each other was bizarre. Aside from James' flying and Quidditch practices, and the occasional detention they served apart, they were, truly impossible to see without the other. Then again, it was odd thinking about the fact that he wouldn't be waking up each morning with Peter, Sirius and James either.

As they neared London, Sirius' mood seemed to grow darker and darker. James tried to distract his best friend, but even James, who was as stubborn as they came, eventually gave up. Instead, James turned to talk to Remus, who welcomed the distraction. He could no longer concentrate on his book, knowing he was so close to seeing his family again.

''Course, it's not long since you saw your mum and dad,' James said, 'but I suppose it'll be nice to see them now your mum's a bit better. She  is  better, right?'

'Yeah, right.'

Shit, Remus had to remember to not look like he hadn't seen his parents for the last half a year. And what about his mother? If the boys saw Hope Lupin, in full health and eager to see a son she hadn't seen for many months, what conclusion would they draw?

For once, it seemed luck was on Remus' side too. Lyall was alone on the platform, informing Remus that Hope (who was the better driver) had stayed in the car, unable to find any parking. Remus hugged his father, then said goodbye to Sirius and James (they had already said goodbye to Peter who had left with his mother), and forgetting all about Peter and Sirius' worries, Remus left with his father to go find the car - and his mother.

'Remus, my darling,' his mother exclaimed and opened the door to the driver seat. She'd found a spot to park the car illegally, and now she jumped out to engulf Remus in a hug. 

'Lyall, you're driving,' she said over Remus' head, 'I don't care how much magic you use, I am sitting in the back with my boy.'

'Our boy,' Remus heard his father correct with a small chuckle. 'Alright, now, hm... yes it won't be a magic-free drive, that much I can promise you.' 

Lyall kissed Remus' head, then his wife, and then Hope steered Remus to the backseats. Remus was pleased his mother didn't let go of him. Maybe he was too old to be treated this way, but Remus didn't care. He was looking forward to sitting next to her all the way home. 

Remus had missed his parents. More than he had realised. 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'It's just you and me left,' James said to Sirius as they watched Remus leave with his father. 'Can you see your parents anywhere?'

'No, thank Merlin.'

'Good,' James said, trying to ignore how uncomfortable Sirius' words really made him, 'gives me a chance to introduce you to mum and dad! Come!'

James tried not to run as he saw his mum and dad. He had missed them so much and yet he wanted to look cool in front of Sirius, who surely would think him childish for being so desperate to see his parents. He relented a few feet away and raced into his mum's arms. Euphemia smelled like home and she pressed James tightly to her chest.

'It's good to see he's not completely forgotten us,' Fleamont teased as James was released from his mum's embrace. 'I was starting to wonder with the number of letters that remained unanswered.'

Fleamont bent down to give James a hug, before ruffling his hair affectionately: 'I see Hogwarts hasn't changed your opinion about using my potion?' 

'Dad,' James complained, 'it's cool this way.'

'It most certainly is not,' came Sirius' voice. James turned in time to see Sirius look... well, if he didn't know better, he'd say Sirius looked nervous about what he had just said, but that couldn't be right. Sirius didn't get nervous.

Sirius looked down quickly, his cheeks a little pink.

'And you must be Sirius,' Euphemia said, and pulled Sirius into a hug too. 'We've heard lots about you.'

'When Jim has bothered to write, that is,' Fleamont added. 

James noticed his dad startle, slightly amused, slightly confused, by the hand Sirius had just stuck out.

'Nice to meet you, Mr Potter.'

'Nice to meet you too, son,' he said taking Sirius' hand, 'and please none of that Mr Potter, I am Fleamont. Yes, I know, it's a godawful name, but it's always a source of some amusement. My father has... let me say... his own sense of humour.'

James thought his father was doing rather well. He knew meeting new people wasn't really his thing. But he was putting in a good show for Sirius, and that meant the world to James. 

'Where are your parents, Sirius?' Euphemia asked, looking around.

'Maybe Mother has forgotten,' Sirius shrugged.

'Maybe she's running late,' Euphemia said, frowning slightly. James didn't know how much his mum and dad knew about Sirius' parents. 'Well, we're in no hurry, we'll wait here with you.'

'There's really no need -'

'Are you that keen to get rid of me,' James teased.

Sirius looked alarmed, looking up at Fleamont and Euphemia: 'No, of course not.'

That wasn't exactly the banterous reply James had expected. 

'Mate, is ev-,' James stopped as Sirius paled and drew himself up.  

‘I need to go,’ Sirius muttered. Without another word, he marched away as if to his doom.

James looked in the direction Sirius was headed to see a tall, formidable woman who stood proudly a bit to the side of all the hustle and bustle of Hogwarts students and their families. Walburga Black looked cold, unfriendly, and despite the lustrous black hair and handsome face she looked terrible. Terrible and terrifying. If a painter had wanted to give distaste a face, Walburga Black would do the job nicely. 

Next to her stood a boy who couldn’t be more than a year or two younger than Sirius and who James immediately understood to be his brother. That, then, was Regulus Black.

It had taken a few weeks from Sirius first let slip his brother’s name for James to guess who Regulus was to Sirius. If he was completely honest with himself, James had hoped he’d been wrong. Not because he minded Sirius having a brother, but because Sirius had kept this from James, which could only mean one thing: Sirius didn’t fully trust James. Somehow James had failed to be the friend he had wanted to be. Otherwise, Sirius would have told him.

Regulus Black’s grey eyes moved from watching his brother’s progress with interest to James. He tugged gently at his mother’s robes. Walburga Black looked displeased at her son's attempt to get her attention, but her eyes followed her son's hand as he pointed at James and his family. The woman’s eyes narrowed as she said something to Regulus. By now Sirius had joined them, but he didn’t turn to look at what his mother and brother were discussing. However, James could just make out his friend’s fists tightening.

Regulus’ eyes narrowed just like his mother’s had as he sent James a look of utter disapproval. James wasn’t stupid. He remembered well what Sirius had said the first day they met: ‘the Potters are blood traitors.’

Blood traitors and proud to be so, James reminded himself as he turned away. He couldn’t bear to watch Sirius go off with those people. It took all of his willpower not to run after his best friend and insist on him coming with James.

Shit! Like the dirtiest heap of dragon dung you could find. James had been an idiot. He should have found a way to keep Sirius in school. Hadn’t he promised himself to never watch Sirius get hurt again? Sirius had already been suffering for weeks at the idea of going home and James had ignored it, so desperate to be flying on his own broom again, to see his parents and Sarah and Carl. 

James knew he’d shut himself out from his parents but he couldn’t muster the will to please them. As soon as he got home he went up to his bedroom and closed the door with instructions not to be disturbed. There, on the table lay his broom, clearly polished by his mum, but he felt no gratitude, nor did he feel any guilt when he grabbed it, carried it to the door and threw it out in the hallway.

Brooms be damned. He was a shit friend, and there was nothing he could do about it. It was a new and truly horrible feeling to be so powerless.

/

James wanted to be angry, but  by the following morning he already found it difficult to maintain his anger. He didn't speak much during breakfast, but unlike yesterday evening, it took work. In fact, he wanted to tell his parents all about Hogwarts. But he owed it to Sirius to not have a good time. Sirius certainly wasn't. Therefore, he marched upstairs again after breakfast.

'Aren't you a bit young to be hiding from your parents?'

'Sarah!' 

Sarah Shafiq had opened the door to his bedroom. James jumped up from bed and ran over to hug her.

'Hi Jamie,' she said, and neither one broke the hug for a while.

James knew that the captain of the Holyhead Harpies had a reputation for being brutal on the Quidditch pitch (and he'd seen enough to know the reputation was merited), but he knew her to also be extremely affectionate. 

'Did you get the poster?' Sarah asked when they finally broke free, her dark brown eyes studying James.

'I did, thank you!'

'It was for a friend, right?'

James nodded, feeling a pang of guilt. But for the first time since he'd left Sirius yesterday, the thought of his best friend didn't immediately produce a desire to punch something - or cry. 

'And it's for Christmas, so he's not opened it yet?' Sarah asked.

Well, Sirius had opened it. He hadn't wanted to bring the gift home, but James had made him swear not to tell anyone about the new signature on the poster.

'When is it being announced?' James asked, not wanting to answer the question.

'Round about now, in fact. I am hiding here until it blows over!'

'What's it got to do with you that Ludo Bagman is joining the national team?'

'We'll be team mates. Journalists are bound to be chasing all of us,' Sarah said simply. 

James suspected she wasn't telling the full truth, but now that she was here, he had far more important questions.

'How is he?'

'Bagman, you mean?'

'Yes!' 

Ludo Bagman had joined the Wimbourne Wasps five seasons earlier, and he had quickly proven himself as the best beater the team had ever had. In fact, the Wimbourne Wasps was one of the favourites going into next season. Sirius, who was especially interested in beaters, claimed Bagman would soon be the best beater in England, and James didn't doubt it. 

'Too good looking for his own good,' Sarah said darkly.

'That's not what I meant!' James hadn't meant to stamp his foot impatiently, but he was dead curious about Bagman.

Sarah laughed and pulled James into another hug. James wanted to protest, he wanted answers, not a hug! But then she squeezed him tightly and said: 'Merlin, I've missed you. You know that, right, Jamie,' and James squeezed her back. He'd missed her too.

'But seriously,' James said once he felt the hug had gone on long enough: 'what's he like?'

'I have played against him a few times, and he's as talented as they come - but I don't know him yet, do I? I'll tell you what, I'll give you a full debrief in the summer.'

'You could write when you know more?'

'And get my opinion about Ludo Bagman plastered all over the Daily Prophet? No, thank you.'

Exactly why Sarah was so concerned about her name being in the newspapers, James didn't understand. He'd love to be the papers for something - especially something as cool as being a professional Quidditch player.

'Sarah Shafiq, you didn't tell me the Ludo Bagman is going to play for England?!' 

Carl Potter, James' cousin, had suddenly appeared in the door to James' bedroom. Unlike Sarah, who was truly James' cousin on his mum's side, Carl wasn't really James' cousin. Exactly how they were related was unclear, but Fleamont Potter had always treated Charlus Potter as if it was his younger brother, and James had always grown up calling Charlus his uncle.

'I take it the news has dropped,' Sarah said conspiratorially to James, before turning to Carl. 'Nice to see you, Carl. James is home, if you haven't noticed.'

'Hi James!'

'Hi!'

'Now, Ludo Bagman - why didn't  you tell me!?'

'I didn't realise I had any obligation to tell you anything.'

Carl and Sarah weren't related, as far as James knew, but their parents had become friends after James' parents had gotten married, and as Sarah and Carl were the same age, they were practically siblings. 

'It's Ludo Bagman!' Carl exclaimed, 'Sarah, you know I've had a crush on the guy since I first saw him swing a beater's bat.'

'Carl -' Sarah said, and James noticed she was looking uncomfortable.

'Are you worried I am going to give James dangerous ideas?' Carl sighed, 'James, sometimes men like men. There. We've had that talk. Now then, I want to hear all about Ludovic. Is he single?' 

'You've not seen James since the summer and it's Bagman you want to talk about?!' 

'I don't mind,' James said quickly. 

He wasn't sure he cared much about whether Ludo Bagman was single or not, but he was bound to get lots of questions about Bagman at school when he made it known his cousin played with him, so he was more than happy to stay on the topic.

'And I know what being gay means,' he added quickly. Though he had not known Carl was gay. James was sure Carl had brought home a girl only last summer. 

'James made the house team, you know!' Sarah protested.

'Really?!' Carl said, 'nobody tells me anything!'

'Because you're a right pain in the -' Sarah glanced uncertainly at James.

'Arse, is the word I believe you're looking for,' James said, grinning. Sarah grinned back.

'Wash your mouth young man,' Carl mock scolded him, 'such language. They didn't teach us that at Hogwarts.'

'I didn't realise they taught you anything, Carl,' James deadpanned.

'He's learned a bit of sass, has he?' Carl said, raising an eyebrow.

'I think we're forgetting the main bit of news here,' Sarah said.

'Yes, that the hottest player in the Quidditch league -'

'That James made the team in his first year!' Sarah interrupted Carl.

'So, he's not half-bad, we knew that already.'

'I swear he'll be better than Alex in time,' Sarah said and James could hear the pride in her voice. 

'Perhaps... but for now, you're still useless compared to us.'

'Am not! You're old!' James protested. 

'The nerve of him!' Carl shook his head. 'Haven't you heard, thirty is the new twenty.'

'But twenty would be old too!'

Both his cousins laughed at this. Didn't change that they were old, though, James thought privately.

Carl went over to ruffle James' hair: 'Come Sarah, let's remind Jimjam here that there's still a long way to go before he beats either of us.'

'I dunno,' Sarah said, 'I wouldn't put it past him to beat you soon enough. You are getting out of shape!'

'Just because I don't have Ludo Bagman's body...'

'That's enough! The man is twenty-four. Jamie, broom - and a change of clothes, it's freezing outside. Carl, grow up - and help James, will you? I'll see you both outside and ready to play in fifteen minutes.'

'Just because she's the captain of a famous Quidditch team it doesn't mean she can boss us around,' Carl muttered, but he was smiling. 

'Alright, kiddo, Sarah is right. You need warmer stuff than that. Let's see,' and with that Carl started going through James' wardrobe to find something more suitable. James could have told Carl he bloody-well knew how to dress himself, but it was nice being home, and having all these people looking after him.

Ten minutes later, as James made his way downstairs with Carl, he realised he'd forgotten his promise to have a bad time. But James supposed there was nothing he could do to help Sirius, so he might as well have some fun.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Sarah stayed the night with the Potters. 

The following morning it became clear to James why Sarah had wanted to hide from journalists. Sarah had just opened a magazine at the breakfast table when she suddenly swore loudly. While that usually would have landed her a reprimand from Euphemia, James' mum instead hurried over from the kitchen counter. 

'What is it, dear? I thought Monty said there wasn't much about Bagman in the Daily Prophet.'

Fleamont, sitting at the end of the table, also looked up, frowning: 'If there was, I am afraid I missed it.'

'There wasn't,' Sarah said, holding up the magazine for Euphemia to read: 'it's Witch Weekly - which suggest they've known about this for some time and just waited to print the story until the announcement was made. I don't know how...'

'Beater Betrayal: Ludo Bagman's Heartless Romance with Alexandra Shafiq - really?' Euphemia had put on her reading glasses and was scanning the article: 'Illicit affair between Puddlemere United's star chaser Alexandra Shafiq and then-reserve beater Ludovic "Ludo" Bagman revealed at last - what is illicit about two players dating? He wasn't married?'

'Oh, it's nothing but rubbish!' Sarah said hotly, tearing the magazine from Euphemia's hands: 'whoever wrote this trash is trying to make it out that Ludo is the reason Alex died, as if someone like him could ever be the end of her? Just listen to this.'

Sarah took a deep breath, and when she started reading, her voice was loud and she enunciated each word with barely disguised anger: 'In an explosive revelation that is sure to send shockwaves through the Quidditch community, the sordid details of a scandalous affair between Puddlemere United's star chaser Alexandra Shafiq and their then-reserve beater Ludo Bagman have come to light. The shocking story, which has remained hidden for years, paints a devastating picture of betrayal and heartbreak. This surely puts into question the decision by the English Quidditch team to sign Bagman as their new beater - the very team where Miss Shafiq played as a chaser until her tragic death five years ago, and where her sister Sarah Shafiq - well, you know that part,' Sarah said, looking up, 'I am still on the team.'

'Sources close to Miss Alexandra Shafiq have confirmed that the talented chaser was deeply in love with the young beater. However, it appears that Ludo Bagman had far more cynical motives for the relationship. "Ludo saw Alex as nothing more than a Golden Snidget! He hoped that she would be able to get him on the team. Alex, bless her soul, naturally held very little power as she was so young herself - for all her talent - and when Ludo found out she wouldn’t be of much use, he left her immediately. He departed from the team soon after, as you know, and thought nothing more of the relationship or how his behaviour had affected poor Alex”.'  

Sarah stopped reading: 'It's outrageous - to suggest that Ludo - that Alex...!'

Euphemia frowned slightly: 'It paints Bagman in an awful light, but it doesn't -'

'I am not done,' Sarah interrupted darkly: 'here we get to really juicy bit: Our source had to pause as tears filled their eyes, illustrating the profound impact this tragic affair had on those who knew Miss Shafiq best. "I am sorry, but even though it's been several years now, it still breaks my heart to think of Alex, such a talented and promising witch. Alex was devastated and beyond any consolation (- she wasn't! -). It was her first real relationship (- it wasn't - ) and those close to her saw how much it affected her (- there was nothing to see! -). Alex started taking dangerous risks, at the same time as her head was no longer in the game. I often wonder if I could have prevented the tragic accident that so prematurely ended her -".'

'I think we get the idea, dear,' Euphemia said firmly.

'Well,' Sarah said, clearing her throat after a short break, 'the rest goes on to talk about how Alex' "untimely" death left the wizarding world in mourning. I'll spare you that, but just let me read the very last bit for you: This dark chapter in Ludo Bagman’s past casts a long shadow over his career and raises serious questions about the personal ethics of the Quidditch star, especially as he steps into his new role on the English Quidditch team. The only serious question this dragon dung of an article raises is which Dorcus approved for this to go to print!?'

When nobody answered, Sarah threw the magazine across the room. It hit the wall hard and slid down to land on the kitchen counter: 'Who the hell is that bitch Rita Skeeter?!' 

'That's enough, Sarah!' Euphemia's voice was hard, but she tucked a strand of Sarah's long hair behind her ear as she said so, so James knew his mum couldn't really be that angry with Sarah. 'I know this must be awful. Do you want me to get Seraphina?'

Surely Sarah, who was an adult, didn't need her mother around her? But to James surprise, Sarah seemed to consider this for a moment.

'No, that's okay. She's with aunt Dorea and uncle Charlus at the moment - in case any journalists come crawling to her house. I am sorry, aunt... Actually, sorry all. This isn't exactly the peaceful breakfast you were hoping for.'

'My dear,' Fleamont said calmly, 'we have James staying with us at the moment - nothing is going to be peaceful until he's safely back at Hogwarts.'  

'What's that supposed to mean!?' James spluttered.

'Are you going to prove us wrong, Jim?' his dad asked, raising an eyebrow.

James was saved from answering (he really wasn't sure he wanted to prove his dad wrong), by the arrival of Carl Potter, who emerged in the kitchen doorway, brushing soot of his healer's robes.

'James, cover your ears,' Carl said hotly. James wouldn't have listened to his cousin, but he didn't even get the chance before Carl said a whole number of words that James was sure his parents didn't approve of.

'Carl Potter! Watch your language, young man!.. And aren't you meant to be at work?'

'Sorry aunt - and yes, but I've got someone covering for an hour. I had to come here when I heard what that ... vicious cow...' here he stopped for a second, glancing at Euphemia.

'Better,' Fleamont said his lips twitching, 'but not quite there.'

'That woman then - had written!'

Carl's cheeks were flushed with anger - James wasn't sure he'd ever seen Carl this angry: 'To write such a story without giving the family any notice - and as for Ludo Bagman -' here Carl used some new words that James was sure he knew weren't among those his mum would approve of.

'Stop it, please!' Sarah said, standing quickly. 'Ludo's not done anything wrong! He's a bit of an arse, but to be honest, so was Alex. They dated for a bit, alright? That was it. Then they made the decision most of us Quidditch players do, which was to focus on their career. It was a mutual agreement to end it, and what happened to Alex was just an accident - just a meaningless, stupid accident and had I -' 

Here Sarah suddenly stopped, drawing a sharp breath and to James' surprise, she didn't resume talking. Instead Sarah drew another deep breath and then, after a strangled: 'sorry,' she started crying. And it wasn't just the odd tear. Sarah let out a horrible, pained, sound as streams of tears started flooding down her face. She covered her mouth with her shaking hands, her knees gave out and Carl closed the gap between the two and caught her.

James felt bewildered. Sarah had been angry, not sad.  

'It's okay,' Carl said soothingly, holding her tightly as she found her footing again. 'Shit Sarah, it's okay! You're allowed to hurt. You're allowed to miss her.'

'I think some tea is in order,' Euphemia said quietly, looking at the two with concern and love and warmth. 

Adults crying and girls crying were probably two of the things that made James most uncomfortable, but he loved Sarah, so he got up and put his arms around her too.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Despite the dramatic start to his holidays, James soon found his time at home to be as enjoyable as he had hoped. He and Sarah, who always had two months off in winter and saw it as her personal responsibility to train James, played Quidditch almost every day, joined by Carl whenever he wasn’t working a shift at St Mungo’s. On top of that, his dad found time to practise duelling with James, which, since it wasn’t strictly speaking allowed, they usually did when his mum was out or otherwise engaged. In turn, James and his mum would play Wizard Chess or bake together whenever his dad retired to his study.

The one exception to James' holiday bliss was, to his surprise, Christmas morning. At first, he had been excited to see the mountain of presents by his bed. He was doing his usual survey of all the gifts before deciding which ones to unwrap first when he came upon a small package he had brought with him from Sirius. James suddenly remembered with painful clarity that Sirius had received no birthday presents. Would Christmas be the same? Would the only present Sirius received be the one from James?

This put James off opening any presents. Instead, he went downstairs, not entirely sure what he wanted to do. He was in half a mind to find Sirius, but the trouble was he had no idea where Sirius lived, except that it was in London—which was barely any help at all.

Going downstairs turned out to be a disaster as his mum and dad asked if he was unhappy about the presents. When he told them he hadn’t opened any yet, they asked if he didn’t feel there were enough presents! The worst thing—the absolute worst thing—was that this was exactly the sort of thing that would have bothered him before he’d met Sirius.

Thankful that neither Sarah nor Carl were around, because James felt his eyes burn - with anger, of course! He was eleven, after all.

‘Darling, what’s wrong?’ His mum had asked in alarm as she got up from the kitchen table.

It had taken a bit of time to explain how Sirius hadn't gotten any presents on his birthday and James' worries about Sirius' Christmas, but eventually he got there. Euphemia pulled James into a hug. James felt ashamed at how good it was to be wrapped in his mum’s arms.

‘I think I should get something more for Sirius,’ James said, once he was free of his mum's embrace. ‘I got Sarah to give me this poster of the English Quidditch team because I don’t have access to my money, but you and dad can get some for me, right?’

‘Why don’t your dad and I get him something? You can help pick it out so we know it’s something he likes. How about that?’

‘Do you think that will be enough? If he gets something from you and he got the poster from me?’

‘Sometimes, it’s not about the presents, my love. Sometimes it’s about knowing you have somebody who cares about you. Whether that’s enough for Sirius right now, well, that’s difficult to know.’

James knew bloody well it wasn't about the stupid presents. He wasn't five. But that was the point-: 

‘I wish his family  would  care!’

‘Maybe they do, James. We don’t know -‘

‘He says they hate him!’

'That's not the same thing,' Fleamont said calmly. He had come to stand next to his wife. 'I know you think it is, Jim, but you're not a parent.'

James had rarely - if ever - remembered feeling so let down by his dad.

'You've got to be joking right?! He got no presents on his birthday. Of course they hate him!'

His mum and dad exchanged a quick look, then his mum asked, carefully: ‘Darling, what does he tell you about them?’ 

‘Just that they are mad and evil and obsessed with blood purity!’

‘Does he speak about how they treat him?’

‘No, not much…’

Sirius was a bit odd that way. He could speak quite openly about how much he hated his family but he was also weirdly vague on certain aspects - like the fact that he had a brother.

‘Maybe you can ask him about that, when you see him again? And James,’ his mum hesitated, ‘if he should say anything that... worries you, please suggest to him that he speaks to professor McGonagall.’

‘What do you mean?’ James felt a slight unease at the way his mum and dad once more exchanged a look. What in Merlin's name was going on?

Euphemia pulled James into another hug, as she said quietly: ‘hopefully nothing, my love.’

Boxing Day was a pleasant experience, as uncle Charlus, aunt Dorea, Carl, aunt Seraphina and Sarah came over for the usual Boxing Day lunch. The food was excellent, as always. The mood was also considerably brighter than when Rita Skeeter's article had first appeared. While Sarah did inform them that some deranged Ludo Bagman fans (mostly girls) had written and accused Alex of having used a love potion on Bagman, and subsequently accused Seraphina and Sarah for framing Bagman for their own benefit, most readers of the article had either left them alone or written to them in support. 

'Ironically, it doesn't seem to have hurt Ludo too badly either,' Sarah finished, sighing and pushing away her now empty plate. 'Mind you, not that that's a bad thing as he is innocent of what that... Skeeter woman has accused him of, but it's odd, isn't it? Most people seem to believe the article, but somehow that has just made the man more attractive.'

'Everyone loves a bad boy, Sarah,' Carl said, having just swallowed a large piece of his second helping of treacle tart. 'He dated the hottest property - shit, sorry, aunty, bad way of putting it, but you know what I mean - Alex was pretty, and pretty damn good. She could have had anyone, and yet in this story Bagman tossed her aside as if she didn't matter. Who wouldn't want to be the person to finally win that man's heart.'

'Not me,' Sarah said.

'No, but you've got self-esteem,' Carl said. 'Me on the other hand...' Carl suddenly coughed: 'if Ludo had been a girl I mean.' 

It was a poor save from Carl in James' eyes, who'd come to expect wittier saves after spending a term with Sirius. 

James was aware his own parents knew that Carl was gay, and it saddened him a little that Carl seemed determined to keep it from his own parents. But then again, aunt Dorea and uncle Charlus had always been a bit more traditional.

'Well, that figures, we all know you have no self-esteem!'

'Sarah!' aunt Seraphina reprimanded.

'It was a joke, mum!' 

'Sarah, being scolded by your mother!' Carl said grinning. 

'Shut it, you!' 

'Thank you both for setting such excellent examples for Jim,' Fleamont added dryly. 

James, who had just taken another bite of his treacle tart, let out a protesting noise.

'Eh, whatever that boy is saying now is not our influence!' Carl said. 'He's got friends now, blame them!'

Swallowing his food quickly, James was about to retort when his mother unexpectedly cut him off and turned to aunt Dorea: ‘That reminds me, I saw your niece, Walburga, the other day.’

'You're related to Walburga Black?' James asked in astonishment. Aunt Dorea - related to Walburga? Aunt Dorea - related to Sirius?

'Yes, dear. I was a Black before I married Charlus here.'

'Does that mean -'

'Not now, my love,' his mum said firmly. 

James considered arguing, but his curiosity got the better of him. His mother must have raised this for a reason. Looking down at what remained of his treacle tart, James decided to give the rest a miss. The topic of conversation had completely disrupted his appetite. Plus, it was, after all, his fourth helping. 

Aunt Dorea turned to Euphemia: ‘When you say saw…?’

‘At a distance. I did not exchange a word with her.’

James' mum looked like she wished she had.

‘Good. She never has anything pleasant to say, my niece. Not that she - or anyone - speaks to me more than they can help. After all, I did marry a Potter.’

‘Could have done worse,’ uncle Charlus said, ‘we had to take in Druella's girl, Andromeda, for a bit after the Blacks cut her out completely. All done in complete secrecy, of course, or my dear wife might have suffered the same terrible fate. The girl is married now, though, and properly settled.’

‘Andromeda made the grievous mistake of announcing her intention to elope with a muggle-born. You, my dear husband, for all your blood traitor views and relatives, are still a pureblood.’

‘There you go, Jim, we’re not a disgrace enough,' Fleamont said, smiling at James. 'Hopefully you’ll do us proud and marry a muggle-born so everyone understands what the name Potter truly means.’

‘I’m not marrying anyone!’ James exclaimed. Merlin, parents had the funniest ideas.

‘Hear hear!’ Carl and Sarah chorused, but the other adults just smiled.

'James here is a friend of Walburga's oldest son, Sirius,' Euphemia continued. 

'Do you know him?' James asked eagerly, forgetting his mum's warning. But she didn't seem to mind.

'I know of him and his brother, naturally. But I haven't seen Sirius more than once, when he was about three years old. A good thing too by the sounds of it. Otherwise I might have been blamed for his newfound friendship with a Potter.'

'You think they would really mind that much?' Euphemia asked, looking concerned.

'Look, we're all blood traitors here - well, the Shafiq name, I suppose, still holds some value -'

'Thanks to dad,' Sarah interrupted, 'honestly, once my Quidditch days are over, I might find some muggle-born bloke. I bet that would make dad turn in his grave.'

This surprised James greatly. Not just the idea that uncle David had cared about something as stupid as blood status (which in itself was news to James), but he had not known Sarah to speak ill of her father. 

'You were saying?' aunt Seraphina asked aunt Dorea quickly.

'None of us are especially popular with people like my niece. But I think Sirius' friendship with James pales in comparison with him breaking the Black tradition and getting himself sorted in Gryffindor, if that's what worries you.'

'So you know about his sorting?' Fleamont asked, 'and here I had the impression you barely communicated with your family.'

Aunt Dorea laughed: 'News travels quickly within my family. This particular piece of intelligence I had from Andromeda.'

'And Sirius' parents are likely to have taken his sorting badly?' Euphemia asked.

'Yes,' Aunt Dorea said firmly, looking unusually grim, and James felt his stomach tighten. It wasn't news to him, of course. Sirius had said so many times. Yet, it felt different, hearing it from his aunt.

'But he's lucky Andromeda decided to run off with a muggle-born just now. It does make his crimes look a little less severe, I daresay even in Walburga's eyes.' Aunt Dorea looked around the table: 'Well, this does make a change, doesn't it? This isn't exactly our usual topic of conversation.'

'No, you're right,' Euphemia agreed, 'if you don't mind, I might want to pick this up with you later, but why don't we talk about something nicer for now.' His mum turned to Charlus: 'Carl tells me you're thinking about retiring, is that right?'

James agreed with his aunt. The conversation had been a very different one from those they usually had. His head was spinning from everything he had learned: Aunt Dorea was related to Sirius and his uncle David had cared about things like blood status. Sirius had been right, where on earth had his parents been keeping him all these years? How was there so much he hadn't known, even about his own family?

If things had been different, James might have spent the rest of the day and night pondering these news, but as it happened, he was soon distracted: all the food and treacle tart had given him a stomach ache.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

There had been times at Hogwarts when Peter had really missed his mother. The trouble was that Peter still missed his mother at home. Or rather, he missed the person his mother had been before his father had passed earlier this year. Now, it felt like he lived with a stranger. Actually, it felt like he lived with two very different strangers.

There were days Peter would wake up to find that his mother had not gotten out of bed. When she eventually came downstairs, she barely spoke a word. She'd sit in an armchair and smoke muggle cigarettes the whole day. She wouldn't read, or eat, or go outside. Those days, Peter often went over to his neighbours Mr and Mrs Powell, as they always seemed pleased to have him for dinner. He'd come home and his mother wouldn't ask him where he had been or if he had eaten anything. Peter would go to bed, and leave his mother with her cigarettes in the otherwise empty living room. 

There were other days where his mother would wake him up, making him breakfast, and if he wanted to go outside, she would make him put on two scarfs and the warmest jacket she could find. This mother would worry if he wasn't back exactly at the time they had agreed, she would fuss over him at dinner, force him to eat all his vegetables and insist on hearing everything about Hogwarts, while at the same time, she would worry about whether he'd choke if he ever started speaking before he had swallowed his food.

Empty mother and worried mother. Peter tried not to be too disappointed when he woke up to find it was an 'empty mother' day. After all, while he preferred 'worried mother' because she at least seemed to care about him, neither felt like home. Neither was the mother he had grown up with. 

New Year's Eve was the closest he felt to being with his mother again. They were standing outside in the snow-filled garden, watching the fireworks.  

'Come,' his mother said smiling, lifting her wand, 'let's send up some sparks of our own. The muggles won't know the difference.'

Peter could have told her he wasn't allowed to do magic outside of school, but he was sure his mother knew that already. Instead he lifted his wand too. He was sure Sirius and James would have been able to produce stronger and brighter sparks, but he felt he was doing alright as he watched the red sparks explode out of his wand tip. They raced up to the sky next to his mother's green ones. 

'You are my little lion, aren't you?'

Peter noticed his mother looking at him intently. 

'You don't mind?' he asked. They hadn't really spoken much about his sorting.

His mother was prevented from answering as the air around them exploded from all the fireworks which lit up the sky brighter and louder than before. The clock must have struck midnight.

'Happy new year, darling,' she said, bending down and kissing his cheek.

'Happy new year, mum,' Peter whispered into her ear.

'It'll be better than the last, I promise,' his mother said, wrapping her arms around him. She was thin - too thin. 'Come, let's go inside where it's warmer.'

His mother made some hot chocolate ('one mug, and then straight to bed, understood?'), and they sat down at the kitchen table.

Peter was nervous his mother had forgotten the question - or didn't want to talk about his sorting. He wondered whether to bring it up again. Then again, this evening was going quite well, and he didn't want to push his luck. 

'Your dad would have been proud,' his mother said, breaking the silence. 

'About what?' Peter asked his mug defeatedly. 

There was truly nothing to be proud of. He was not particularly good at school, he wasn't good looking like Sirius, nor was he talented on a broom like James. And both at the top of their class too. They were effortlessly smart and funny and increasingly popular. As for Remus, he seemed to understand everything, and Peter often felt like he understood nothing. 

'Of you learning magic, of your strength to carry on despite everything, and certainly, my darling, of you being in Gryffindor.' 

Peter looked up at his mother. Her face was as gaunt as it had ever been, but her smile was warm and familiar to Peter.

'But you were in Slytherin,' he said. Slytherins and Gryffindors hated each other.

'And your dad would have been in Gryffindor, had he had magic.'

'Why did you marry a muggle?' Peter asked, realising he had never asked this before.

'Because there are many types of magic, darling.'

'Oh,' Peter said. He wasn't sure he understood what his mother meant.

'Would you have married him had he been a Gryffindor?'

His mother laughed: 'Of course I would. I understand - the house rivalry feels very strong at school - but that changes once you leave Hogwarts.'

Peter wasn't sure he believed that. He couldn't imagine Sirius or James ever befriending a Slytherin. But Peter didn't argue the point. Instead, Peter finished his chocolate and said good night. As he lay in bed, he wondered what kind of mother he would wake up to in the morning.

'He abandoned us, you know,' his mother said the final evening before Peter went back to Hogwarts. It was the first words she had spoken to Peter the whole day.

'Who?' Peter asked.

'Your dad.'

This confused Peter as much as it hurt him. That was a lie.

'He died. He didn't leave us.'

His mother let out a thin, humourless laugh. Peter knew she had been drinking. Drinking and smoking and not eating. 

'He could have lived.'

'The doctors did everything they could.'

'We could have gotten a healer, you know that, darling, don't you? The healers at St Mungo's would have been able to cure him, and he could have lived to see you grow up.'

His mother got up unsteadily and walked over to the kitchen, pouring herself another glass and taking a seat at the small kitchen table. 

'Sit down.'

So Peter sat down. He didn't like what was happening. Not at all.

'He could have been here, right now, instead he made the decision to abandon us.'

'The healers couldn't help him, he was a muggle. It's not allowed -'

Peter didn't like speaking up to his mother, but she was wrong. Over the last few months, he had gotten used to Sirius and James standing up to people, and the idea that he, Peter, had to do that now felt terrifying. But there was no Sirius and James. And his father didn't deserve this. His father had been brave. And good. And fair. 

'Nobody would have known,' his mother continued, and Peter wasn't even sure she'd heard him. Some job he was doing, defending his father. 'I could have brought a healer here, and nobody would have known. But no, Andrew was determined to do what was right. That's what bravery and doing the right thing does to you, darling. It gets you killed.'

Peter didn't know what to say. What he could say. What he dared to say. So he remained quiet. 

But one thing was painfully obvious. His mother did mind his sorting, after all. Peter felt his eyes burn as he tried to blink away tears.

'Hey, now,' his mother said, cupping his face. 'I am still here.'

Was she? Peter wasn't sure.

'And you, my darling son, you can be as brave as you want, as long as you remember to stay alive. Okay? Stay alive for me... and for your father. He was an idiot, but he loved you. And I love you too.'

'I love you,' Peter said, aware he was fully crying now. 

His mother swayed a little as she slid down from her chair and knelt before him. Peter threw his arms around his mother and they remained there, on the floor, hugging. He didn't agree with her, his father had been brave and had done the right thing, but it didn't matter. She was hurting, and he loved her.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Lily! Over here!' Mary's voice called out over the chatter of families saying goodbye to their children, the sound of hooting owls and the scraping of heavy trunks.

Lily had already said goodbye to her mother and father. She had previously spotted Severus standing with Avery and Mulciber, as well as Rosier and Wilkies, who were Slytherins in the year above. Noticing how some of those boys glared at her parents, she had suddenly felt very eager to say her goodbyes and have them leave. Not because Lily Evans cared what people like them thought about her parents - she couldn't care less - but because she knew her parents would worry about her, should they ever find out that being 'muggle-born' made you different from everyone else.  

'Thank God,' Mary said earnestly as Lily approached her and Maeve. 'Does this mean we get to sit with you or are you going off with that Snape boy again?'

Maeve was still surrounded by her parents and her older sister Ciara Ryan, whereas Mary, like Lily, seemed to have shed her parents as soon as she could.

'Ma, Da, this is me friend Lily Evans, she's a right smartarse, this one. She's muggle-born like Mary, so I was hopin' we could take them to watch some Quidditch next summer? They won't get that with their families.'

'Aye, nice to meet you, Lily, Maeve has told us all about you and Mary,' Mrs Ryan said, smiling down at Lily.

'As for Quidditch, I've always said the more the merrier, isn't that so me little puffskein?' Mr Ryan said jovially.

'Da!' Maeve protested. 

'That's very kind,' Lily said quickly, trying not to smile at Maeve's pet-name. Lily wasn't sure what a puffskein was - and she was sure Mary wasn't either, but Mary being Mary, Lily was confident they would soon both know what a puffskein was. 

'Yes, very kind Mr and Mrs Ryan!' Mary agreed.

'Alright ye lot, ye better get on that train,' Maeve's father said, and Maeve and Ciara, and Mary and Lily said their goodbyes to Mr and Mrs Ryan.

'Lily?' 

It was Severus. She was relieved to see he was alone. Lily was just about to follow Maeve and Mary onto the train but she stopped in her tracks.

'Sev, hi!'

They had seen each other most days over the Christmas holiday. It had been complicated and not-so-very complicated at the same time. Severus didn't want to be invited over to her parents. She liked to believe it was because parents in general made him nervous - thanks to his awful father - and not because he didn't understand - didn't like - muggles. If she was being honest with herself, it probably was a combination. 

As it was ice cold outside they had kept walking around in the neighbourhood, sometimes drinking tea or hot chocolate from a thermoflask Lily brought with her. It was wonderful, walking around in the snow; it was peaceful to be in a world that wasn't disturbed by loud Gryffindors, sulky Slytherins, or even Petunia. Now, however, all the distractions of the past term were there again.

'Where are your friends?' Lily asked, cautiously. 

'I thought you and I could find a compartment again,' Severus said, seeming unsure of himself.

'Without that lot?' Lily needed to know.

Severus nodded. Lily felt ashamed of herself as she felt her heart sink just a little. She had wanted to sit with Maeve and Mary for once. She felt she needed to make more of an effort with the girls in her own house. Yet, Severus was her best friend, and this might be the last chance they had for it to be just the two of them. 

Before she had a chance to answer, another voice called out:

'Lily, thank Merlin! Come, I want to introduce you to my mother and father!' 

Lily turned around to find Eloise Rosier rushing up to her: 'Hurry, we've not got all day!'

Confused, Lily let Eloise drag her away from Severus.

'Mother, father, this is Lily Evans!' Eloise panted as she reached a stern-looking couple.

'She's a friend,' Eloise pushed. 'Lily, this is my mother and father.'

'Nice to meet you, Mr and Mrs Rosier,' Lily said, trying to ignore how uncomfortable she felt as the cold eyes of Eloise's mother surveyed her. The father didn't even look at her as he said with an indifferent air: 'Lovely.'

Lily felt her cheeks burn.

'Ignore them,' Eloise said a few minutes later as she and Lily made their way to the train. 'They don't like that you're a mu-muggle-born. Oh, here's Georgiana! Had a good holiday, Georgie?'

Georgiana looked as stunning as always. She smiled at the two, her perfect, white teeth putting Lily's own to shame.

'It was nothing exciting. I am just glad to get away from William again.'

William Selwyn was Georgiana's younger brother.

'Be happy you still can. I have to put up with Evan both at home and at school, and it's a right pain in the- hello, Snape.’

Severus had appeared by Lily's side for a second time.

'Have you come to steal our flower away?' Eloise asked, looking at Snape with rather more hostility than Lily liked.

'I am not stealing anyone!' Severus protested. 'Lily and I always sit together. We're best friends.' 

Here, Severus looked at her. Lily, though feeling somewhat embarrassed at the whole scene, said quickly: 'Yes, we agreed to find a compartment just as you found me, Eloise.'

There was no point suggesting they all found one together. Severus' friends didn't like her, and her friends didn't like Severus.

'Whatever, come Eloise,' Georgiana said, coolly.

'Next time, Lily, you're sitting with us!' Eloise said, as way of goodbye. 

/

'They are using you, you know that?' Severus said, just as the train left the last of the city behind.

'Who exactly is using me?' Lily asked. She knew what his answer would be already, and there was no hiding the steely note in her voice. She loved Severus, but this idea that she couldn't look after herself was ridiculous.

'Eloise Rosier and Georgiana Selwyn.'

'And how are they using me precisely?' 

The thing was, Lily suspected that Severus was right. She couldn't for the life of her figure out what Eloise and Georgiana saw in her, they were so very different from Lily and mostly they just let her tag along when it suited them. Yet, they seemed to have life under control in a way that Lily didn't. Like Maeve, they were from wizarding families, but unlike Maeve, they didn't just talk about Quidditch. 

It was easy to just accept the rather odd friendship. Lily wished, however, that she could have brought Mary along when she saw them. Lily was confident Mary would have liked Eloise and Georgiana, except Mary, like all Gryffindors, made it a rule not to befriend Slytherins. 

'Eloise just wants to make her family angry. Evan told me that's what's she's like. She likes hanging out with you because your parents are muggles and -'

'And that would annoy her family. Lovely,' Lily snapped. 

'I am just trying to -'

'I don't care what you're trying to do, Sev. Evan Rosier is your friend. If Eloise can annoy him by being my friend, doesn't that tell you what you need to know about him?'

Severus opened his mouth, and Lily realised she didn't want to go there. She didn't want to fight Severus yet again.

'Forget it,' she said, crossing her arms and looking out the window.

Fantastic, they didn't even need their friends to be present to pull them apart. It was enough that they were back in the wizarding world. A world Lily adored, because she was finally able to learn and use magic. It was like finding out that a part of her had been missing, and understanding why it was that without this world, she'd never been as happy as she now could be. But it was also a world that was far more intricate and complicated than she had pictured. She had gone from being an outsider in the muggle world because she had magic, to being an outsider in the wizarding world because her parents didn't have magic.

'Lily, there you are!' The compartment door slid open to reveal Mary. 

Of course Mary had come looking for her. Lily smiled at her friend.

'Listen, I won't take up much time, I just wanted to ask, did you have a good Christmas?' Mary threw Severus a slightly cautious look, but Severus didn't look at her. It was his turn to stare at the snow-covered landscape outside.

'Yeah, it was good! Nothing big though. Just me, and mum and dad... and Tuney. You?'

'It was great -' Mary seemed to hesitate. 'You remember I told you about Jacob?' 

Mary's younger brother. Lily nodded.

'You know how I told you he has kept saying he also has magic, but I didn't believe him. I mean, it seemed impossible that he too could have magic, right? I just thought he wanted to be like me.'

Lily nodded again, feeling her stomach twist a little. She saw where this was going, and it stung, knowing how sometimes things worked out for some people. Some siblings.

'Well, er... I saw him do it. Magic I mean. He turned the whole Christmas tree blue. I didn't think you could have two muggle-borns in the same family!'

'It's not uncommon,' Severus said, unexpectedly. His eyes were still fixed on the world that was passing by.

'Is it more normal than me and Tuney?' Lily asked.

Severus shrugged.

'Sev?'

Her best friend looked at her: 'I really have no idea.'

'Well, in any case,' Mary said, 'mum and dad were very happy.'

'You must be too?' Lily asked.

Mary shrugged, but she was smiling brightly: 'oh I dunno. Having him trail me about the castle in a few years is going to be annoying,' then, meeting Lily's eyes she said: 'but of course I am happy. Right, I better go before Lizzie sends a search party.'

Lily raised an eyebrow, and Mary sighed: 'Yeah well after you left we got stuck with Gemma and Lizzie. They're not bad, but you're not missing out on much. Well, you know how they are.'

Mary shrugged once more, and then left them. Indeed, Lily knew exactly how Gemma and Lizzie were - not too different, in fact, to Eloise and Georgiana.

'Do you want to play some Exploding Snap?' Lily asked Severus. There had been enough interruptions - she just wanted to spend some time with her friend.

/

'Hurry up, will you?' came a familiar, lazy and unwelcome voice as Severus and Lily made their way down the corridor of the now stationary train. The voice had drifted out of a compartment ahead. Severus stiffened and Lily had to stop behind him. Not good.

Lily and Severus had been slow getting off the train, both aware how they would be separated once they reached the castle.

'Next time,' another voice said through a yawn, 'don't wake me up just as we arrive.' 

Lily knew that voice too. 

'Nah you're good, I was talking to this flobberworm. For the love of Merlin, James, just dump the stuff into your trunk and be done with it.' 

'Come on,' Lily whispered, nudging her friend.

'Alright, alright! If you're all ready? Remus?' 

'Yeah, almost.'

The sound of a trunk being closed filled the now empty corridor, but for Lily and Severus. 

'Sev?' Lily pushed.

Then, James Potter emerged, practically bouncing out of the compartment, and Lily saw Severus raise his wand before she could stop him. 

Potter had no warning. The messy-haired boy was thrown a few feet back and hit the floor of the train with a loud thud. Lily felt her stomach twist uncomfortably. 

'Bastard!' 

Black jumped out, wand in hand, but Lily stepped between the two. 

'Sev, come on!' 

Maybe it was a stupid gamble, but she kept her back to Black, hoping he wouldn't attack her in Severus' place. Lily needed her eyes on her best friend. 

'Yes, Snivellus, listen to your girlfriend!' 

Lily could hear the snarl in Black's voice.

Severus sidestepped Lily and Black raised his wand, but Lily wasn't about to give up either. Once more she pushed her way between the two. The spell Black had cast missed her by an inch. 

Severus looked livid: 'DON'T YOU DARE!' he shouted over her shoulder. 

'NO!' Lily shouted. 'Stop it!' Her eyes were burning, and she blinked furiously. 

'Go!' Black said, coolly. 'I won't miss a second time.'

Lily didn't need telling twice. She'd had enough - if Severus wanted to stay and fight, that would be his business. Luckily, she could hear Severus following her, his footsteps urgent behind her.

'Why can't you just leave them alone?' she begged Severus as they made their way to the horseless stagecoaches.

'They never leave me alone!' 

And there was a lot of truth in that.

'I can talk to them?' she offered. 

'I don't need your help!' 

Severus was still flushed from the confrontation. Lily decided to talk to him about it later. Instead, she took his hand and squeezed it: 'I know that! I just want to help you. That's what friends want, right? To always be there for each other.'

Severus' whole face changed and he smiled at her, his dark eyes eager: 'Yes,' he said, 'Always, Lily. Always!' 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Nice robes,' James grinned as Sirius was finally close enough to hear him. 

James had come early, his dad had helped him find a compartment and as soon as he had said goodbye to his parents he'd been on the lookout for his friends, and especially Sirius. He had already pointed Peter and a rather ill-looking Remus (accompanied by his father) to the compartment he had chosen. Had James been someone who was anxious, he might have worried that he had missed Sirius in the crowd as the clock approached eleven, but James had always been confident he would spot his friend.

'We're burning it,' Sirius said darkly, though he grinned back, his grey eyes shining brightly, 'as soon as we get to Hogwarts.'

'How was -' James started, looking his friend more carefully up and down. He looked normal. 

'Don't ask.'

'But-'

'Don't ask.'

So James didn't. 

'I found out how we are related,' James offered instead, panting slightly as he helped Sirius with his trunk.

'Oh yeah.' Sirius looked supremely uninterested at the news.

'My aunt Dorea - well, she's not really my aunt - but I think of her as my aunt - she's married to my sort of uncle Charlus Potter - anyways, she is actually your mother's aunt. In here.' 

They hoisted Sirius' bag up on the luggage rails.

'You look terrible,' Sirius said, frowning at Remus.

'He's just a bit unwell,' James said quickly, 'aren't you?' 

Remus made for a sorry image, his face was ghostly white, his eyes tired, his body wrapped up in the cloak James had lent him, but Mr Lupin had told him Remus was just a bit unwell. And James saw no reason to doubt Remus' father, who had shown every sign of caring for his son as he helped him on the train earlier.

'No, I am most definitely dying,' Remus said, smiling weakly.

'Any final words?' James asked, assuming as grave an expression as he could.

'Madame Maxwell is too old for you, James.'

'Sod off!'

'Mate, your immune system is shite...' Sirius said, throwing himself into the seat next to Peter, as James took the seat next to Remus. 

'My nan was visiting,' Remus said quickly, sitting up a bit straighter, 'she is old, so she gets sick easily. I think we all caught what she had.'

James nodded. He'd been unable to see his grandfather this Christmas because he'd been unwell, but Fleamont insisted it was nothing serious.

'Your father looked okay,' James observed, thinking it was good Mr Lupin had been well enough to help Remus.

'He got sick first,' Remus said almost defensively. James stared at his friend: Yes, well, exactly, that was a good thing wasn't it? They hadn't all gotten ill at once.

'What about your mum?' Peter asked, suddenly looking anxious, 'Remus, is she okay? Would getting sick be really bad for her?'

Merlin, James kept forgetting Remus' mother was unwell. He was very glad his own mum was healthy!

'She's doing alright, just a bit under the weather, like me.'

'Maybe,' Sirius said dryly, 'if you two stopped interrogating Remus, he'd get a chance to rest.'

'We're not interrogating anyone!' James protested, but Peter looked almost ashamed.

'Sorry, Remus,' the small boy apologised.

'Are we tiring you out?' James asked.

'Yes!' Sirius said, before Remus could answer.

/

'My parents got you a Christmas present,' James said, a few hours later. 

When the lady with the trolley had passed through, James and Sirius had bought enough sweets and cakes to fill the remaining seats in their compartment. They managed to get some of the food into Remus, who had since fallen asleep. 'You know what they say,' Sirius had said confidently: 'feed a cold, starve a fever.' 'Except when you have a fever, then you feed that too,' James added. Sirius grinned: 'Exactly!'

Now, James held out the rectangular gift. Sirius took the present.

'A book?' he asked curiously, as he felt the package. 'My parents also gave me a book - and of course those dreadful robes - but I have a feeling that I might prefer this one.'

James grinned: 'I think you'll love it.'

'Mastering spells and defences: A duellist's handbook' Sirius said, his grey eyes eager as he turned the book over in his hands. 'I can't imagine what we'd be using this for.'

'Open it,' James said. 

Peter was looking over at the book in Sirius' hands and James felt relieved to see the interest on both their faces: it had been a good present then. Of course it had been - it was a book about duelling. Now he was waiting in anticipation to see what Sirius would make of the inside.

'Is this your father's doing then?' Sirius said eyes widening as he flicked through the pages. 

'He thought he'd add some notes here and there.'

'That must have taken some time?'

'Yeah well, he loves that stuff,' James studied his friend, 'you don't mind the notes, do you?'

'Are you kidding me? This is brilliant! Shame we can't start practicing right now,' Sirius glanced at Remus' sleeping figure before turning his attention back to the book.

Sirius eventually handed the book over to an eager Peter. While Peter looked through the first few pages, Sirius started rummaging through his own trunk.

'Here,' he said, tossing a book to James, which he caught easily, 'this is the book from my parents.'

'Purity of blood: the key to magical strength and stability,' James read aloud, 'sounds a treat.'

James flicked through some pages before he threw the book back to Sirius, feeling sick: 'it's a joke, right?' 

'No jokes, mate.'

Bile rose in James' throat: 'No,' he said, 'I won't accept this!'

Sirius barked out a laughter so loud that Remus opened his eyes for a second, looked around confused and then closed his eyes again.

'Don't bloody matter whether you accept this or not, mate,' Sirius said, his voice now quiet.

'Someone's got to stop things like this being printed,' James hissed. It took all his effort not to raise his voice.

'Why?' Sirius shrugged. 'It's always been like this - it always will.'

Sirius was annoyed at him then, James realised. Sirius rebelled as a rule against the status quo. Things having 'always' been a way had never stopped Sirius from challenging it. 

'But people might believe -'

'James, mate, I thought you were brighter than this. People already believe this!'

'I know people have some twisted ideas about how being pureblood makes you somehow better,' James said feeling impatient, 'but some of the ideas here are... evil. There's a chapter on how to "clean" half-blood childrens'-' James had to stop for a second to swallow the ever threatening bile: '-blood.'

Which often, according to the book, resulted in their deaths. But instead of thus warning the readers of using the method, the book merely suggested that this meant the child in question had no right to live: there had been too much muggle-blood in them to sustain life. 

James realised Peter had continued to follow the conversation, despite the duelling book in his hands. His eyes were wide open, his face having lost all colour. 

'It's just rubbish,' James said quickly, pulling himself together. 

Sirius didn't say anything.

'Do your parents believe -'

'Not that - not in the slightest. I think that chapter appeals mostly to pureblood grandparents dealing with a child's eloped offspring - or some really deluded half-bloods, what do I know. My dear parents believe the only way to have pure blood is to be heavily inbred. But they like the book, believe me.'

James took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. Usually, he quite liked how he could remember things in a way others couldn't. But right now, he'd give quite a lot to forget the words that felt burned into his brain.

'The real world too much for you, Potter?'

This wasn't the real world, but James didn't bother arguing. James put his glasses back on, and watched as Sirius snatched the duelling book from Peter again, and flicked through the pages.   

'This,' Sirius said firmly, 'we're learning this spell tonight, and we're using it on the first Slytherin we see.'

It was a peace offering - to move on from the current, dark discussion, and James took it. He only needed to glance at the page to see what Sirius was referring to. It was an odd duelling spell, but it was perfect for them - or rather, it was perfect to cast on an unsuspecting Slytherin.

'You're on!'

/

When James hit the floor of the train, he felt all the air get knocked out of him. He barely noticed that his glasses fell off him. Instead, his focus was fixed on the pain shooting up his right hand. 

Shit. 

He had tried to use his arm to minimise the impact of the fall, but it had twisted as his body landed on top of it. James closed his eyes to get his bearings. He could hear the raised voices of Sirius, Snape and Evans. Shitshitshit, he really didn't dare move at first. What if...? 

Gently, James untangled his hand once his breathing was more even, preparing for the worst. It hurt, but not nearly as bad as he had feared.

'James, are you - you are alright, right?'

Sirius helped James sit up, and James could feel Sirius' hands tremble slightly.

James tried to move his wrist. It was sore, but alright. He was alright. He smiled at the blurry figure that was his best friend: 'I had you worried.'

'Only because you're as weak as a squib's spell,' Sirius mumbled. 

'James, are you okay?'

Two more blurry figures appeared.

'I'm alright,' James said quickly as Sirius helped him up.

'No need to look so disapproving, Remus,' Sirius said, 'it was entirely unprovoked.'

'That depends on your definition of unprovoked,' Remus muttered, loud enough for James and Sirius to hear.

'Where are my glasses?' James asked.

'I am afraid they're broken, mate,' Sirius said. 'We can get someone at the castle to repair them. Don't suppose you've got a spare pair in your trunk.'

James hadn't. He had meant to get another pair after he lost his first during the start of last term, but he hadn't gotten around to it. Almost unconsciously, James felt himself grab Sirius' arm. He tried to sound unaffected by it all, like he didn't mind being unable to see much until they got to the castle:

'No... but whatever.'

'James, I completely forgot,' Remus said, 'I've got your old pair.'

'What?' 

This was Sirius asking, sounding astonished. James hardly cared. If Remus had his old glasses that was good enough for him.

'Yes, er... I got an older student to summon them ages ago but then I forgot about it.'

Remus sounded unsure - probably ashamed that he had forgotten to give them back earlier - but James just wanted to throw his arms around his friend and hug him.

Sirius and Remus left Peter and James to get Remus' trunk down, and soon they were all on the now empty platform, James thankfully wearing his old glasses. 

'Here,' Remus said, holding out James' cloak for him, shivering slightly, 'thanks for letting me borrow it.'

Remus' own cloak seemed to do little to keep him warm. James shrugged: 'Just keep it for now.'

Remus seemed to hesitate.

'Seriously,' James pushed, 'Snivellus just gave me about a thousand bruises, the cold air is extremely welcome.'

'So frail, our Jamie,' Sirius said, smirking. James gave him a shove to shut him up.

'We could go exploring - it's not like we need to take the stagecoaches to get into school. And no one would miss us at dinner,' James suggested.

'Don't be daft, there's nothing to explore here,' Sirius said, dismissively. 'Besides I am hungry.'

But this didn't turn out to be right. 

James noticed that Sirius, like himself, didn't eat a lot at dinner - they were both too full from the cakes they had eaten earlier. The person Sirius - and Peter - seemed to push food on was Remus, and it occurred to James that Remus might not have felt up to exploring the grounds around Hogsmeade train station just that evening. 

Later, in their dormitory, Sirius and James studied the spell from the duelling book, though neither was keen to let the other cast it on them. They agreed, fairly in James' view, that they probably had the hang of the spell once they had practiced it without a living target. The best way to truly test the spell was to put it to use on a Slytherin, after all.

While Sirius seemed okay, James wanted to make sure he got the welcome back to Hogwarts he deserved. Laying awake for what seemed like hours after the two of them had decided to call it a night, James was trying to think of what he could do for Sirius. Just as he drifted off to sleep, James realised exactly what he needed to do. It was simple, required no particular preparation and could be executed the very next morning. Sirius would hate it, James thought happily. 

It was perfect! 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Sirius lay awake the first night they were back in the Gryffindor tower, trying very hard to forget the break. He was back where he belonged. He was home. This was home. 

The absolute worst part hadn't been his mother’s scolding; nor the punishment he'd received at her hands. No, it had been when - to his absolute horror - his mother had come into his bedroom and started crying. She had actually had the nerve to say he had 'broken her heart'. 

Three years! It had been three years since she left him alone in the middle of London, and from that moment she had never shown him any affection. She had ignored him, scolded him, punished him. Did she truly expect him to believe she had a heart to break? 

Regulus lapped it up big time though: 'she's hurting.' 

So sodding what if she was?! What did that say about his mother, if she could be hurt by the fact that the sorting hat had found him to be brave; that he had befriended one of the more inclusive, if not quite private, wizarding families in Britain? And yet, Sirius had found it hard to be angry at his mother that evening, and he was furious at himself for it.

He wasn't weak like Regulus. 

/

Sirius must have fallen asleep, because the next thing he knew, he was suddenly drenched in cold water. What the...? 

A far too excited James Potter and a suspiciously nervous-looking Peter Pettigrew were standing over him with a big bucket that had presumably, just recently, been full of water.

There was only one thing to do. As soon as he had caught his breath, he jumped up and tackled James to the ground. Instinctively though, Sirius wrapped his arms around his friend so that it was Sirius who took the brunt force of the fall, remembering just in time that James had already been thrown to the floor yesterday by Snivellus.

That cowardly bastard.

Sirius had wanted to hex Snivellus so bad the previous day, to punish him for being the foul git that he was - for belonging to the same house as the Blacks and for being ashamed of things like his or Evans' blood status. More than anything he wanted to demonstrate what Sirius did to people who attacked his friends - especially unprovoked. But he didn't hex people who had their back turned to him, so when Evans blocked his aim, Sirius wasn't about to attack her. Although it had been a near call at one point when he had thought he could get Snivellus, only to have Evans block his attempt once more. The spell had nearly hit her.

There had been one chance at getting at Snivellus, right at the end when Evans left the train just before her spineless friend, but by then Sirius had noticed that James hadn't returned to his side. That couldn't have been good. So he let the long-nosed oddity of a Slytherin go, knowing he needed to check that James wasn't seriously hurt. For a moment he had feared James had been.

'Peter,' Sirius panted now with the effort of keeping James pinned to the ground, 'take that bucket and fill it with water. As much as you can carry!'  

Peter looked foolishly down at the bucket he was still holding in his hand.

'Now!'

Turned out the git didn't need to be told thrice. Peter scurried out of the bedroom, and returned a little later, his face having gained colour from the effort of carrying the bucket. It wasn't as full as Sirius had hoped it would be - but then again, James and Peter had probably carried the bucket together the first time. 

'Go on.' Sirius was positively breathless by now, James was putting up a good fight. 'Pour it!'

'Pour it?' Peter blinked (rather stupidly in Sirius' opinion).

'Over the git!'

'James?'

'Do you see any other gits around here?'

Well, Sirius himself, but Peter wouldn't be quick-witted enough to pick up on the opportunity Sirius had handed him inadvertently.

'M-maybe,' Peter said, looking like he wanted to grin at Sirius but couldn't quite pick up the courage.

'Fair enough,' Sirius said - he was grinning. It wasn't much, but this was progress from the small boy. Well done, Pete. 'But right now I am thinking of the bespectacled git who is too dry for my liking.'

Peter seemed to draw confidence from Sirius' smile, because he tipped the bucket over James, whose glasses came off him as the sheer force of the water washed over his face and robes. It was a good thing Sirius couldn't get more wet, because a fair bit of it splashed him too. 

Sirius was about to pick up James' glasses before they had more drama on that front, but James got there before him, grabbing his glasses and pushing a distracted Sirius off him. Damn those reflexes.

'What's going on?' came a voice, and Sirius - now wrestling with James - looked up to see Remus' sleepy face poking out through his curtains. 

'Morning exercise,' James said brightly.

Sirius detested morning exercise. He didn't particularly like mornings - or exercise. And he certainly didn't like being woken up drenched in water. And yet... Sirius couldn't help but smile.

'You look better,' Sirius observed.

Remus smiled back: 'A good night sleep seems to have done the trick! It's good to be back, isn't it?'

Peter nodded, and Sirius couldn't help but agree. It was great being back with Peter, Remus and - of course - James. 

/

The first week passed remarkably quickly, despite James and Sirius' detention that first Monday evening. The teachers all seemed to want to give them a week to ‘get up to speed’ again which neither Sirius nor James needed. This gave them plenty of time to explore the castle, prank students and, for James, play Quidditch. 

As the second Gryffindor match of the season approached, Sirius had feared he’d never see his friend. However, it seemed Christmas had helped boost James belief that he was catching up to the rest of the team. He did attend practices, which was scheduled for twice a week and he did get Jenny Robins and Ciara Ryan to agree to practice on Saturday mornings with him separately, but other than that he seemed quite content to avoid the Quidditch pitch. This meant that Sirius had a whole weekend to look forward to with James, Peter and Remus, once James returned from his practice that Saturday morning.

Sirius decided to have a lie in - feeling warm and comfortable as he heard the unmistakable sounds of James getting up for Quidditch at an (in Sirius' view) ungodly hour. Sirius rolled over in his bed, and when he next awoke and opened his velvet curtains, the bright wintery sun was pouring through the windows. 

'Where's Remus?' Sirius asked, looking around. The only other person in the dormitory was Peter. He had already gotten changed into his robes and was lying on top of his duvet cover.

‘Library.’

Yeah well, that figured. Sirius ought to have been able to guess as much, except-:

‘We don’t even have any homework yet.’ 

Sirius wasn’t quite able to hide a note of disapproval. Peter didn’t say anything to that. Not that Peter had said much all week.

Sirius got up and had a shower. Returning to the dormitory, he found Peter still lying on his bed.

‘You okay there, mate?’

Sirius could see Peter’s head jerking in a sort of nod. Wishing James or Remus was there, Sirius sighed and went over to the small boy. 

'What's wrong?'

'Nothing,' Peter said, sitting up and making some space for Sirius. Sirius sat down at the edge of the bed.

'Well, that's a bloody lie... so spit it out.'

Merlin, why was Sirius doing this again?

'It's my mum...'

'She's not sick too?' 

There were too many sick or dead parents amongst the Gryffindor boys. Too many and too few... Sadly Sirius' parents were in excellent health, despite his many prayers.

'No, not really...' Peter sounded unsure. 'I suppose there are many ways to be sick.'

Yes, Sirius agreed privately. Walburga Black was definitely sick by some definition. Madness was a form of illness after all, and his mother was definitely mad. Sirius could sense that Peter was about to say something more. The boy opened his mouth, closed it and then opened it again. Then, James Potter burst through the doors.

Peter closed his mouth quickly.

‘Where’s Remus?’ James asked, looking around the dormitory.

‘Library,’ Sirius answered.

James grimaced: ‘what’s he doing that for? We’ve got spells to practice!’

‘You don’t need telling me that!’

‘Fair enough! Once I’ve had a shower we’ll find Remus and then a classroom… only, let’s stop off at the kitchen first, I’m starving!’

James always was, after practice.

/

‘Do you think she’s a Slytherin?’ James whispered eagerly as they saw a sour-looking girl approach.

Sirius and James weren’t far from the kitchen. Peter had said he might come and find them later. While an unexpected answer - Sirius wasn't sure he'd ever been turned down by Peter Pettigrew, especially not when the plans concerned food - neither Sirius nor James had bothered fighting him on it. If he was going to be sulky, he could do that away from them.

Without discussing it any further, knowing full well that time was of the essence, Sirius and James ducked behind a statue before the girl had a chance to spot them.

When James and Sirius had agreed to test the slug-vomiting charm on the first Slytherin they saw, both had known they actually meant Snivellus. While all Slytherins needed to be taught a lesson in how unwelcome they were to normal wizards and witches, nobody deserved to vomit slugs more than that slimy git. Sirius had been allowed the great honour of hexing him, which he had done just after Potions on Wednesday. He had held Snivellus too long at wand point on the train to resist the opportunity when James suggested it. However, this meant James hadn’t actually cast the spell yet on another person. This might be his chance.

‘Must be,’ Sirius muttered. ‘She’s too ugly to be anything else.’

‘And we’re not that far from the dungeons,’ James added.

Just before the girl rounded the corner, James raised his wand and muttered: 'Slugulus Eructo'. 

Laughing quietly, Sirius and James quickly slipped through a tapestry. No point in lingering and getting caught, not for something this unimportant. James was hungry, Remus needed to be dragged out of the library and more spells needed to be learned.

/

It transpired the following morning, however, that the girl was in fact a muggle-born Hufflepuff and rumours started spreading that it was her blood status that had caused her to be a target. Which was why James and Sirius found themselves in McGonagall’s office Sunday afternoon, with the sour-faced girl next to them.

‘We didn’t do it because you’re muggle-born,’ James clarified, turning to face the girl.

‘No, we did it because you’re ugly!’ Sirius supplemented.

‘And you have that same angry look many Slytherins have,’ James finished.

‘Thank you, both!’

McGonagall looked unimpressed but Sirius felt they had done a good job setting the record straight. There was an important difference - he wasn't like his family.

‘Of course old McGonagall didn’t see it that way,’ Sirius shrugged when he related the story to Remus and Peter later.

‘So... I’m guessing detentions?’ Remus asked, looking about as impressed as their Transformation professor.

‘Only one,’ James confirmed.

'Tomorrow,' Sirius added. 

‘We've been told to go to Filch’s office!'

"I’m not sure who that's a worse punishment for," Sirius reflected, 'us or him.'

'I imagine we will be treated to a lecture before we start,' James agreed.  

‘Maybe we can write it for him?’ Sirius suggested.

‘“The benefits of corporal punishment on mischief-makers” has a nice ring to it,’ James grinned.

‘“The decline of general behaviour in the student population following a relaxation of punishments”’ Sirius mused.

‘“Why polishing silver in the trophy room is as effective as a squib’s spell in deterring nasty rule-breakers from breaking rules”’ James suggested.

‘I’m glad to see you two are taking it seriously,’ Remus said. Sirius could detect a note of disapproval in his voice.

‘Well you know me,’ Sirius said, grinning, ‘I’m never Sirius.’

Remus raised an eyebrow. Peter laughed. James rolled his eyes, but his lips twitched upwards.

Well, two out of three wasn't too bad.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

‘Who on earth needs a forgetfulness potion?' Sirius asked James, sounding annoyed. 'I can understand a memory potion, but who sat down to say: I know what people need - to forget!'

'I dunno, do I?’ James said, though privately he would have loved to forget those pages in Sirius' book he had read on the train. 

It was the third week of January, and the Gryffindors and Slytherins were making their way back from Potions. For the Gryffindors it was the last lesson that day, if one didn't take into account Astronomy that evening, and James never did. 

‘Although...' Sirius said slowly, 'one look at Snivellus and I suddenly see a strong need for it.' 

James felt his mouth stretch into a grin: 'An excellent point. Let's make sure Snivellus remembers his place, shall we?'

James lifted his wand and murmured the tripping jinx. Both laughed as the greasy-haired boy lost his balance, school books spilling out of his bag.

‘Watch your step, Snivellus,’ Sirius said as they passed him and Lily in the corridor. 

Getting one over on Snape put James and Sirius in such a good mood that neither complained much despite spending most of the evening leading up to their Astronomy lesson doing their homework with Peter and Remus in the Gyffindor common room.

'You think you're so funny, don't you?'

James looked up from his transfiguration essay to find Lily Evans glaring at him and Sirius. 

'We've yet to be proved otherwise,' James said, leaning back in his chair. 

'Though I do most of the heavy lifting,' Sirius smirked.

'Sure you do - oi!'

Lily had snatched James' parchment. 

'Evans, if you really needed James' help, you could have just asked.'

'You're not funny!' Lily hissed, 'Neither of you.'

'We will have to agree to disagree,' Sirius shrugged.

'Now if I can have my homework back...' 

James stretched out his arm. 

Lily took a step back.

Sirius and James exchanged a quick look: what was she playing at? 

‘Give me back my homework, Evans,’ James said, trying his best to keep his voice even. She was not going to get the better of him.

Lily looked at the parchment in her hand, seeming to consider the matter.

‘How good is your memory, Potter - really?’ she asked and when James made no reply she walked over to the fire and threw his parchment into the grate.

James met her narrowed emerald eyes. He saw how guilt fluttered across them for the briefest of seconds, but then they hardened again.

'Do you want to wait here until I've reproduced the essay - or shall I come and find you?' James asked, trying to hide his annoyance. 'Mind you, it might have been better to keep the original if you really wanted to test my memory.'

'Leave Severus alone!' 

'No can do, I am afraid,' Sirius said, his voice was casual, but his eyes were stone cold.

'Yeah we have a policy of not leaving foul gits alone,' James agreed.

'I mean it: Leave him alone!' Lily spun on her heel and marched towards the portrait hole.

'Bye, Rose,' Sirius called after her, before turning to James: 'Well, that was pointless. What did she mean by that?'

James sighed: 'I dunno. Blimey, she's a pain.' 

He grabbed a clean sheet of parchment and re-wrote his essay so far, word for word. 

James would make her pay for this, naturally. But later.

‘I really wish the sorting hat had had the sense to put that girl in Slytherin,’ Sirius said, rolling up his own scroll.

‘You and me both,’ James muttered.

It didn’t cost him much, to re-write the start of the essay, but it still took time and now Sirius would have to wait for James to finish up his final arguments and conclusion. It was a good thing it was easy work.

‘Well,’ Remus said absentmindedly as he reviewed his latest paragraph, ‘there’s one good thing with her being in Gryffindor.’

‘What’s that?’ Peter asked, still working on his introduction by the looks of things.

‘It annoys Snape, doesn’t it?’ Remus said. ‘That must be some comfort to you?’

If there was a hint of disapproval in his voice, James chose to ignore it.

'I'd rather have her in Slytherin, to be honest,' Sirius said darkly, and James couldn't help but agree. 

‘Bertha Jorkins! That better not be one of those flyers of Lovegood’s!’

Gideon Prewett was marching down towards their end of the Gryffindor table. James glanced curiously to his left and saw Bertha Jorkins, who sat not too far away, quickly put down her school bag.

‘You must check your eyesight Prewett,’ Jorkins said dismissively, ‘besides I’m not sure it’s against the school rules to read something a fellow student has written - or anyone else for that matter.’

‘I couldn’t care less if professor Dumbledore himself encouraged it. Professor Flump is dead and that rubbish is nothing but dangerous misinformation. I don’t want to see Gryffindors spreading this poison around, and neither does Longbottom.’

‘Oh dear,’ Jorkins said with mock horror, ‘we’ll need to be on our best behaviour then. Now go and bother someone who actually takes your prefect appointment seriously.'

'Prewett looks like he could murder someone,' Ciara Ryan observed as she took the seat opposite Jorkins. 'Why do I get the sense that's your wandwork?'

Jorkins shrugged, but she followed Gideon Prewett's retreating figure gleefully.

'James, good to see ya,' Ciara said. 'Any idea where Maeve's got to?'

'Got you worried, have I, sis?' Maeve said, appearing as if summoned, followed by Mary and Lily.

'Late as usual,' Ciara sighed, though she winked at James, who knew, of course, that she had only just arrived herself.

'Ah sure, our hands were manky after Herbology,' Maeve explained, taking a seat next to Ciara. Lily sat down opposite Maeve, and Mary ended up between Maeve and James.

'Yes, and unlike the boys, we felt like cleaning them,' Mary added.

James and Sirius exchanged a confused look: they had cleaned their hands. Sort of.

'Nevermind that,' Bertha Jorkins said eagerly. 'What do you make of this story with professor Flump, C?'

‘Oh I’ve not bothered with that shite,’ Ciara said, shrugging.

‘What shite?’ Mary asked, curiously.

‘One moment,’ Bertha Jorkins said. She snatched up her bag again, plucked out some flyers and handed one to Mary. James had a clear enough view to read the text.

THE TRUTH AT LAST: PROFESSOR FLUMP’S DARK LEGACY

In a tale that will send chills down your spine, I have uncovered the sinister truth behind the late professor Flump, whose mysterious death in the Forbidden Forest last summer was only the end of a shocking story with more dark turns than Knockturn Alley.

Fitzwilliam Flump, who was widely regarded as a decent, if not entirely inspiring, Defence Against the Dark Arts professor, has been hiding a dark secret. In the five years leading up to his mysterious death, I can now reveal that professor Flump had been kidnapping muggle-born students and leading them into the Forbidden Forest to perform dark rituals. My investigations have led me to believe that professor Flump was worried about his mental decline and had hoped these rituals would salvage his increasingly poor memory.

On the final evening of each school term, professor Flump would perform his ritual, and the following morning, as students prepared to travel by train to London, he would locate the homes of his victims families. Once there, he would obliviate the memories of their muggle relatives. With their memories wiped clean, these families were left completely unaware of their children's fate, unable to report them missing. Meanwhile, back at Hogwarts, the staff simply assumed that the students had chosen not to return the following term, never suspecting the dark truth that they had been ritually murdered.

The circumstances surrounding professor Flump's death remain shrouded in mystery, but it seems increasingly likely that his demise was directly linked to his sinister activities. Was there a final would-be victim who managed to escape and in the process murdered their attacker, or did the Forbidden Forest exact its own form of retribution on the dark wizard?

I implore Headmaster Albus Dumbledore to launch a thorough investigation into professor Flump's actions, so that professor Flump's victims may get their justice. To help this investigation, I have included a list of the missing students I have been able to identify.   Stay tuned for more updates on this dark chapter of Hogwarts history. 

‘Is this some sort of joke?’ James asked. It seemed insane to insinuate that a professor would get away with murdering students and obliviating their families memories. 

Lily, who was holding another copy, frowned as she looked up at him: ‘you can’t seriously have read all of it already?’

It had been a week since Lily had burned James’ homework and it was the first time she’d spoken to him since then. James shrugged.

‘’Course he has! Hey Jorkins, you don’t have another one of those?’ Sirius leaned across Lily and accepted a flyer from Bertha Jorkins.

‘It is not a joke,’ Jorkins said when the others were finished reading. ‘Professor Flump was definitely losing his marbles - right C? And I know for a fact that Dahl and Appleby went missing because mum works in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, and it had her all worried as it happened just before we joined.’

This got James' attention. So students had gone missing.

‘Sure, but their parents reported them missing, so I dunno why he's going on about memory modification...' Ciara shook her head. 'And didn’t Grey move to France the Christmas before this one?'

‘Fine, so Professor Flump only started modifying memories after he realised he was attracting too much attention,’ Bertha Jorkins pushed, ‘and maybe Lovegood got one name wrong, but the rest C, the rest are all gone, aren’t they?’

James looked around, wanting to gauge people’s reactions. He certainly wasn’t sure what to make of it. Most of what Lovegood had written had to be utter rubbish, but his mum had taught him that there was often some truth to be held in most things. Rita Skeeter had got the measure of Ludo Bagman and Alex’ relationship wrong, but she’d been right in them dating. So this list of missing students - professor Flump’s sudden death - there might be something in this.

He met Lily’s gaze. For a second he thought he saw the same curiosity mirrored in her emerald eyes, mixed perhaps with a little concern. Then she looked away quickly.

‘It’s nothing but tosh,’ Sirius said, scrunching up the flyer and letting the small ball fall down on the table. Right, that put a stopper to James’ plan to look into this further.

‘Sure, but what d’you expect from someone like Looney Lovegood?’ Ciara asked.

‘He wrote this dragon dung, did he?’ Sirius asked.

‘Aye, got this dream to set up his own paper, I think. Sadly there might be enough eejits out there for him to succeed.’

‘Like me, you mean?’ Bertha Jorkins asked, looking sour-faced.

Ciara grinned: ‘Yeah, but don’t forget you are me favourite eejit! As for me, if it’s not in the Daily Prophet, I won’t believe it.’

James, however, did not know what to believe. Remus and Peter hadn't been following the conversation at all, and Sirius wore the same distasteful expression he always had when he beheld Bertha Jorkins. Mary, who James could usually rely on for things like this, seemed for once to look about as convinced as Sirius. Lily refused to meet his eyes again, and Maeve hadn't even bothered reading the flyer. 

Students had gone missing though, and that seemed like something worth investigating.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'They are gorgeous Sev,' Lily whispered to her best friend, 'what did you call them?'

'They are Mooncalves,' Severus murmured back. 

The Mooncalves had great big bulging blue eyes on top of their heads, pale grey skin and four spindly legs that ended in large flat webbed feet. It wasn't that Lily couldn't see any resemblance to muggle animals she had seen at farms or in zoos; the long neck reminded her of a baby giraffe she had seen, the spindly legs brought to mind those of calves on farms and maybe it was the grey skin or the short ears, but somehow the whole animal put her in mind of some long necked, graceful version of a hippopotamus, something she had only seen in black and white photographs. And yet, none of these could compete with the wonder that was the small, shy, animals in front of her.

'Come on, before we scare them,' Severus said so quietly that if she wanted to, she could ignore him. But Severus was the one who had brought her here, Severus was the one who knew about these Mooncalves, and it was Severus she knew she needed to trust.

'Thank you so much for showing me this, Sev,' Lily said earnestly as they cleared the last few trees in the Forbidden Forest and continued their walk across the grounds towards the castle. 'I've got to admit, when I realised where you would be taking me, I wasn't all that happy about it. Especially as it's the full moon!'

'But they only come out during the full moon!'

'Yeah, but I've heard there are werewolves in the forest,' Lily said, feeling a little foolish for being worried when Severus showed no signs of worry. After all, she was the one to have been sorted into Gryffindor.

'There aren't werewolves in the forest,' Severus said confidently. 'Where would they live for the rest of the month? It's just stupid rumours, probably started by a bunch of Gryffindors to make them seem braver. I bet Gryffindors sneak into the forest all the time.'

I am a Gryffindor, Lily wanted to point out. But then again, she wasn't sure she always felt that way.

They had passed the Whomping Willow and were nearing the Greenhouses before either of them spoke again.

'It was a wonderful birthday present,' Lily said, eventually breaking the silence.

She thought she saw Severus' cheeks redden a little as his face was lit up not only by the bright silvery moon but also by the light from the many castle windows: 'It was nothing... It was just lucky that your birthday happened to coincide with the full moon.'

'It was a great idea, all the same!'

'I've got something else for you too!'

'Sev! You really shouldn't have-'

'It's nothing big, but you're not allowed to open that before it's actually your birthday.'

'It's basically my birthday,' Lily argued, as she accepted the small wrapped gift. 'But okay, I will wait another few hours hours. Thank you.'

She gave Severus a hug, and then she gave him one more as she said goodbye in the entrance hall. They really didn't have much time to hang about before curfew.

'It suits you,' Severus said, his black eyes taking in the silver bracelet she now wore around her wrist.

Lily had no idea how he had got the money to buy for her. It didn't strike her as particularly expensive (luckily), but she had the distinct impression that her friend went without any money.

'You really didn't have to Sev,' she said once more, struggling to both show her gratitude and wanting to let him know she didn't care about things like silver bracelets. She cared about him. 

'What's that?' Severus asked (seeming to ignore her attempts), his gaze shifting to the parchment in her hand. 

'It's -'

'Merlin, Evans, you're reading that nonsense from Lovegood?' Lily turned around - she really had hoped to avoid those two today.

'You got a problem with that Mulciber?' she asked coolly.

Tyrone Avery and Corvin Mulciber had appeared - or Total Arsehole and Complete Moron as Potter and Black liked to refer to them, which always made Lily want to smile, just a little. 

'It figures, the guy is a mudblood loving -' Avery started.

'Sev!' Lily interrupted louder than she should, since Madam Pince could appear around a bookshelf at any moment, 'you didn't say you brought your friends here to study with you?'

One look at Severus told her that he hadn't expected to see them there either. In fact, Severus and Lily often met in the library because it was the one place she had the distinct impression Avery and Mulciber would avoid more than a whole classroom full of muggles. But as much as Severus seemed taken aback by the appearance by his two friends, he didn't seem to have noticed what they had called Lovegood. Or if he had, he didn't seem to care much. 

'Oh believe me, we weren't planning to hang around,' Avery sneered, 'Severus?'

Severus nodded: 'Yes, of course.' Then her friend turned to her, but he didn't quite meet her gaze: 'It's just... I'll see you soon okay. Don't leave.'

So Lily didn't leave. She grabbed a table and started organising her thoughts. True to his word, Severus returned about fifteen minutes later. Lily slid the parchment she'd been working on into her schoolbag and took out her History of Magic homework instead. Unfortunately, she forgot to put away the flyer from Lovegood.

'What are you doing with that stuff from Lovegood anyways?' Severus said, picking it up and studying it. 'Everyone says he's loony.'

Everyone said a lot of things in Lily's mind, things like: don't befriend Slytherins - for example. 

'Lots of muggle-borns have gone missing, Sev, I don't care how loony he is, someone needs to take this seriously.'

'It's not true, none of it.'

'How do you know?' 

'Listen, Dumbledore cares more for muggle-born rights than any headmaster before him. If muggle-borns had gone missing like that, don't you think he'd be looking into it?'

'Almost all these students went missing before Dumbledore became headmaster though,' Lily argued.

'Lily, I promise you that you have nothing to worry about,' Severus pushed. 'Xenophilius Lovegood is deranged - completely deranged.'

'Alright, Sev,' Lily said, trying to smile. She was glad she'd hid the parchment from earlier. Whether the rumours were true or false, she knew one person who was more interested in this than anyone else, and she had a plan.

'Potter, can we talk?'

Lily had waited just inside the entrance hall after the Gryffindor Quidditch practice, hoping to get James Potter without his faithful entourage of Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew and Remus Lupin.

Over the last couple of days she had noticed how he always looked at her whenever she took out the flyer from Lovegood to study it some more. James Potter wasn't exactly hard to read: she knew the story had caught his attention. If she played her cards right, she could kill two birds with one stone.

'Sure, what's up?' Potter said.

Lily noticed that the rest of the Gryffindor team cast them curious looks, but Potter didn't seem to notice - or if he did, he didn't care. She waited until the rest were out of sight and earshot. 

It was odd. She knew Potter to be a bully, and she knew he didn't like her very much. When she ran into Potter and Black around the castle, she always knew to be alert. Yet, the boy with the messy hair and glasses looked earnestly at her as they waited to be alone, and Lily knew (without knowing how she knew) that he wasn't about to trick her or hex her. She'd asked for his attention, and despite all their history, he was giving it to her.

'Here.' 

Potter glanced down at the piece of parchment she had just thrust into his hands. 

His eyes widened: 'What's this?'

She knew he knew what it was.

'I tracked the people Lovegood included in that list of his. Look,' Lily pointed at a column she had created, 'not all of them are even muggle-born. How this man does his research is anyone's guess. But you see?! All of these people have either left to be educated at home or left the country or become sick.'

'Except Dahl and Appleby like Bertha Jorkins said,' James said carefully, 'and-'

'And Remy and Jason March,' Lily finished. 'Yes, they allegedly ran away. A pair of difficult muggle-born brothers from a troubled household. Nobody looked into that one much. Of course they could just have run away, but...'

Lily shrugged helplessly. She felt foolish for conspiring with Potter over names that meant nothing to either of them. Did she really believe that a previous Defence Against the Dark Arts professor had murdered four students?

'But they could have gone missing,' Potter finished for her. 'Blimey, Evans, Dahl and Appleby disappeared at the same time, as did the March brothers. So the people who've gone missing have gone missing in pairs.'

'I found out one more thing,' Lily said, surprised to hear that she had lowered her voice. Potter leaned in. 'While I can't see any evidence for Professor Flump being involved, it is right that he started showing signs of going a bit... off... around 1968.'

Which was when Dahl and Appleby had disappeared.

'Why take a break though?' Potter said, biting his lip. 'The March brothers didn't disappear until two years later.'

'I don't think he did it. I don't think a professor did this.'

'What do you believe?' Potter asked her, his eyes staring at her intently. 

That was a much harder question to answer. 

'Honestly,' she said, forcing herself to meet his hazel eyes, while trying to remind herself why she was doing this, 'I don't know. It's probably nothing. I don't care really.' 

That last part was a lie. Potter raised an eyebrow.

'I don't,' Lily insisted, 'I did this because I know you wanted to know. I could tell you were interested when we talked to Jorkins. But it took time, pulling this together, and I want something in return.'

'Oh yeah?' Potter said, crossing his arms and taking a step back.

'Leave Severus alone.' 

'Trouble is,' Potter smirked in a way that made Lily want to punch him. Gone was the comradery from before. 'You've already given me the information.'

Oh no, I didn't realise, Lily wanted to reply sarcastically, but she restrained herself. Lily was angry at Potter - and she realised - she was angry at herself, because a small part of her felt a slight bereavement at no longer seeing the warmth in James Potter's eyes.

'It would be a very dishonourable thing to use the information I got for you specifically to keep you from bullying my friend!'

'I am not bullying anyone!' Potter said, looking cross. Then he sighed: 'but fine. I suppose I can leave him be for a couple of weeks.'

Of course it would be "fine", she had counted on his flawed sense of honour.

'A couple of weeks doesn't cut it, Potter. To the end of term.'

'But that's two months or so!' Potter spluttered.

'However will you manage,' Lily rolled her eyes. 'And it won't just be you, I want Black off his back too.'

'Can you keep Snivellus away from us?' Potter asked.

'Yes!' Lily said firmly, having no idea how she would achieve that. 

Lily also wondered whether to argue about the use of that horrible name, but she decided to leave it. While rationally she knew she wasn't asking for much, merely that Potter and Black behaved like decent human beings, she also knew that she was asking for about as much as she could get away with.

'Alright, Evans, you've got yourself a deal. Now if you'll excuse me -'

'Just one more thing,' Lily said, feeling a bit more hesitant. What she said next could mess up everything she had just achieved. 'When - if, I mean - you find something, will you let me know?'

Potter could have smirked at her again. He could have told her that she had made her deal and claimed to not be interested in any of this. He probably should do both. Instead, he just grinned: ''Course I can. See you around, Evans.'

With that, James Potter left her.

He had something in common with Severus, Lily thought, as she watched his retreating figure. Although Lily would rather have Potter or Black cast that awful slug-vomiting charm on her than have either Severus or Potter ever hear her admit to what: both were much nicer on their own as compared to when surrounded by their friends. 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

When the January full moon neared, Remus lied once more and said that his mother hadn't fully recovered yet from the illness over Christmas. By the time the February full moon arrived, Remus was starting run out of excuses. He couldn't continuously go home to see his mother. He could say he was ill, once more, but that had been the excuse he had used when they had travelled together on the Hogwarts Express before the start of term. What was left to him? 

Somehow, he managed to drag himself through most of his classes the day of the full moon, fuelled as much by numb panic as Madam Pomfrey's potions. He had no idea what to say to his friends. Remus should have left himself more thinking time. 

In Potions, the second to last lesson that Tuesday, he finally snapped and did something effective - but rather desperate. Pretending to stumble and fall, he caught the side of his cauldron and drenched himself in the half-finished potion. 

The pain was acute, though not nearly as bad as what he was about to experience later that evening. It still hurt. He whimpered, and instinctively tried to wipe the potion off him. It felt like the gooey liquid was burning his skin. 

This hadn't been a good plan. It was starting to hurt badly. Why had he done this? Another pained sound escaped him.

'Remus!'

'Shit, don't - just lie still mate, take it easy.'

'Professor! Do something! Help him!'

His friends voices were filled with concern, and while it took Professor Slughorn too long, the man managed to conjure a stretcher and get Remus up to the Hospital Wing.

'Professor Slughorn should have been able to do more for you!' Sirius complained as they all sat around Remus' bed a little later. The rest of the class had been cancelled. It seemed unlikely that Professor Slughorn would teach more that day.

'And had I fallen at any other time, he would have,' Remus said, feeling a need to defend their Potions professor who did indeed come out of this incident looking bad, when Remus had timed it so deliberately for his own purposes.

'It was just bad luck, that's all,' James said, still looking slightly shaken.

'It was awful luck,' Peter agreed. 

'You do seem to be one of the unluckiest people I've met,' Sirius said, frowning. 

Don't think too much about it, Remus prayed. But when had anyone ever listened to his prayers?

'Yeah, do us all a favour and place a bet on Ravenclaw winning the match,' James said, 'you never know, it could help.'

Madam Pomfrey had been able to heal him almost as soon as he arrived, and she had played along and told the others Remus had to stay a couple of nights. But her disapproval was palpable. 

'Your body is going through enough as it is young man!' she said sternly as soon as the others had left. And he couldn't exactly disagree with her on that point.

/

Remus waited nervously for all the students to file out of the classroom after their Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson on Thursday. He wasn't sure what Madame Maxwell wanted to talk to him about. He had missed Wednesday's lesson, but she would know why. Sirius had lent him his notes ('no point borrowing James', they will just have doodles of hearts all over them,' Sirius had said, receiving a scowl and a punch from his friend), and Remus had even had a chance to skim these quickly before the class. There was no reason for him to stay behind, except one.  

''Ow are you feeling,  Monsieur Lupin?' Madame Maxwell asked, studying him with her moss-coloured eyes. She, alongside Professor McGonagall, were the two professors who were most able to make him feel like a normal person.

'Alright,' Remus said.

'Next week, we will cover ze treatments of different bites, including ze bites from ze werewolves,' Madame Maxwell said. Indeed, Remus had suspected this was what she wanted to talk to him about. 'I 'ave made ze assumption you want to attend ze class, not to draw too much attention to any absence, but ze decision, it is yours. I weel need you to do ze homework, of course, because zis is important for all.'

'Thanks professor. I will attend.' 

After all, who was more likely to need this information than a werewolf. However, by the end of the class the following Monday, Remus wished he had skipped the lesson after all.

'Professor, is it true that your husband was killed by a werewolf?' Gemma Dawlish said, raising her hand halfway through the class, 'that's what my mum told me.'

Remus felt himself go cold. He did not dare glance at Madame Maxwell in case he found her eyes on him. Instead he looked at the blackboard, knowing that he was the only one who likely hadn't fixed his eyes on their professor.

'My 'usband was killed by a dark wizard, Mademoiselle Dawlish, but zis is not on ze syllabus,' Madame Maxwell said, her voice colder than Remus had ever heard it.

'But you hunted werewolves, didn't you? And so did your husband.' 

Dawlish hadn't even bothered raising her hand this time.

'We specialised in dark creatures, it is true. But ze job of an Auror is not to "'unt" werewolves or other creatures. It is to provide ze 'ighest level of defence against ze dark arts.'

'B-but you must have seen a werewolf, professor?' James asked. 

At least Remus knew the slight tremor in his friend's voice was normal when addressing Madame Maxwell. It was only a small comfort. He didn't like the way this conversation was going and he especially disliked James' interest in the subject.

'But of course.'

'Have you ever killed one?' Mary Macdonald asked eagerly.

Remus felt distinctly sick. He had a strong urge to get up from his desk and leave the classroom, only he wasn't sure his legs would carry him. No longer able to keep his eyes from Madame Maxwell, he looked over at her to see how she was taking these questions. Their professor looked calm as she surveyed the class.

'Ah, I see,' she said, smiling. 'Ze treatment of ze bites, it is too easy for zis class. We will cover werewolves in your third year, but I do not object to sharing ze basics right now. But if I do, I will expect to see zis reflected in ze homework I set.'

And that killed any desire from his fellow Gryffindors to learn more. Well, almost all of his fellow Gryffindors-:

'Lazy, the lot of them,' Sirius grumbled after the class. 'I'd gladly take a bit of extra homework to learn more about werewolves.'

'Me too!' James agreed.

'You noticed how she didn't answer Macdonald's question?' Sirius asked.

Remus certainly had.

''Course I did. So she's definitely killed at least one werewolf!' James said eagerly. 'Cool, huh?'

'Yeah, yeah,' Sirius waved a hand dismissively, 'we all know you have a crush on her. What I want to know is why she didn't just admit to killing it. It's not like- what's up?'

The last bit was directed at Remus, who could not continue walking: 'B-bathroom,' he stuttered. 

Before anyone could stop him, he turned around and walked as quickly as he dared towards the nearest bathroom. 

Remus locked himself into a cubicle and sank down on the floor. They had Transfiguration next and despite his trepidation about crossing his head of house, Remus decided to give the class a miss. 

/

'Monsieur Lupin, come in.'

Remus hadn't meant to go back to the classroom, but once he was in the empty corridors again, his feet had carried him back. He had expected Madame Maxwell either to be teaching or to have left the room, but she was sitting at the desk at the front.  

'I am sorry to disturb you professor,' Remus started, as he closed the door behind him, making sure it was truly shut. 

'I was 'oping for a chance to talk,' Madame Maxwell said, standing up. She seemed more tired that she had earlier, a hand supporting her as she made her way around her desk towards Remus. 'The lesson, it was not 'andled very well. Je suis très désolée.'

She looked it too. Madame Maxwell must have been in her late forties, retired not from age, but from - what was it? - 'a rough scrape' as Ciara Ryan had put it. But just then, she looked simultaneously a lot younger and a lot older, Remus thought. Younger, because she looked far more vulnerable than she had in front of the class (he even wondered whether she had been crying!), older because she looked tired, her eyes slightly dull. 

'Have you really killed a werewolf?' The childish question escaped Remus before he had a chance to stop himself.

Madame Maxwell studied him: 'Probably,' she said finally.

'Probably?' It wasn't his place to push any more than it had been Macdonald's place to ask in the first place, and yet, he now felt he needed to know.

'In the 'eet of the moment, I might 'ave. I 'ave fought werewolves, and I 'ave defended myself. But never 'ave I killed or attacked a werewolf that was not also a dark wizard.'

A dark wizard.

'Your husband,' Remus was barely aware he'd said the two words aloud.

''E was killed by a dark wizard... that was also a werewolf. C'est vrai.'

'How can you teach me!?' 

He was a monster. Madame Maxwell should hate him. She had every right to loath him. To expose him. To refuse to teach him.

'Because,' Madame Maxwell's voice was gentle, 'I 'ave seen evil. I 'ave fought evil. I know evil. You, Monsieur Lupin, are not evil. You are a victim of my failed work. It was my job to keep wizarding Britain from 'arm.'

'The person who bit me might not have been a dark wizard either,' Remus said.

Something flickered in Madame Maxwell's dull eyes. 

'Ah, bien sur! That is true. Maybe I am not entirely to blame.'

Remus had never blamed anyone. There was nobody to blame - and had there been someone to blame, what would it have mattered? Whatever Remus did, he would forever be a werewolf.

/

Remus wished he hadn't caved in when James demanded to know his and Peter's birthday (after having been caught by surprise by Sirius' birthday). 10th March was fast approaching and after the Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson he wasn't ready to pretend that these boys were his friends. Not that he blamed them in the slightest. He was a monster. But the lesson had reminded him about how this supposed friendship was built on falsehoods. 

Over the following week, Remus spent as much time as he could in the library. Even when the others reluctantly followed him (which wasn't often), they were forced to stay quiet unless they wanted to experience the wrath of Madam Pince. However, just like Remus couldn't hide forever from the full moon, he knew that he would eventually need to resume his pretence that he was a normal, soon-to-be twelve-year-old boy with three friends who he had nothing to hide from.

The first real test came on the Sunday before his birthday. Even though they had been given a week to do their homework for Madame Maxwell, James and Sirius had left it until the last moment, as had Peter, following their example.

'There,' Sirius said, a bit too loudly for being in the library, 'I've effectively copied the text from chapter 17 onto a piece of parchment. Bloody waste of time.'

James who had finished his homework just ahead of Sirius, grabbed his scroll, skimmed the content, tossed it back to Sirius and recited in a low voice:

'"While there is no cure for Lycanthropy, and therefore no hope of treating a werewolf bite in a way that prevents the victim from being infected" - optimistic, mate,' James grinned, '"a mixture of powdered silver and dittany applied to a fresh bite will close the wound and prevent the victim bleeding to death." You really ought to break that up into multiple sentences,'  James tutted. 'But I do like your conclusion.'

'What conclusion is that?' Peter asked, looking up from his own homework.

'"The knowledge of how to treat a victim's bite following a werewolf attack is not enough to provide help.' It was Sirius this time, reading his own homework aloud to the rest: 'As a community we must question whether the practice of saving everyone bitten by werewolves is truly the right course of action. While healer Mariana Bonham's practice of not saving victims who begged to be allowed to die rather than to live as werewolves was - and still is - against wizarding law, we have failed as society not to question our current practices."' Sirius looked up, and though he looked quite serious, a small smile curled his lips as he read on: '"However, this is outside the scope of this assignment" -'

'"as well as, it seems, the intellect of most wizards and witches,"' James finished for his friend.

Remus tried not to think. Luckily, looking as if this conversation didn't matter to him required almost all his concentration.

'So you think we should let those that are bitten die?' Peter asked.

Sirius looked at Peter with distaste: 'My conclusion rings true then, this discussion is outside the intellect of some.'

'What he means to say,' James said quickly, 'is that we should be having the discussion, at least. There are lots of documented cases of people who were forced to be treated, and then go on to kill themselves. There's a fair argument to be made that it should be up to the victims to decide.'

'Why don't they get to decide?' Peter asked.

Remus closed his eyes for a second. He had never been allowed the choice.

'There are lots of valid reasons for them not to decide too,' Sirius said. 'Some who beg not to be saved later express gratitude that they were saved. So what are you to do?'

'And,' James added, 'I think some people aren't even adults when they are attacked. Should it be the parents decision or the victim?'

'Finally,' Sirius finished, 'the treatment of these bites often happen outside of St Mungo's. And lots of people want all werewolves dead. So if you find someone who has been bitten and are bleeding out, you could just lie later and pretend that you were following their wishes.'

'Even when you weren't,' James agreed.

'It sounds like the current practices are right then?' Peter asked.

'We don't know,' James said, 'that's the point Sirius is trying to make.'

'For example,' Sirius added, 'I'm positive some people let victims bleed out even with the current laws.'

'Definitely!' James agreed. 'They just pretend that they found them too late or something.'

Remus had never considered the possibility before that his parents could have just let him die. He had been too focused on the fact that he hadn't gotten a choice. Not that he would have been able to make a call at that age, he knew that. It was simply one more consequence of being bitten so young. What would he have chosen, knowing what he knew now? Life, Remus reminded himself. Every day I get out of bed I choose life. 

His parents, forced to uproot themselves, forced into poverty, had chosen the same. They had chosen his life, and his miniscule chances at happiness, above their own.

'Have you considered,' Remus said, forcing himself to speak and keep his voice as normal as he could: 'that just because something isn't included in the first year curriculum, it doesn't mean we won't cover it later?'

Remus needed the conversation to end. He kept his eyes fixed on his parchment as he spoke, not daring to look at the boys lest he give something away. 

'Fair enough,' Sirius said, 'I think I'll keep my conclusion, though. Madame Maxwell can always put me right.'

At this moment, Madam Pince did choose to make an appearance, and James and Sirius, unable to help themselves, started asking Madam Pince loudly if she had had a good weekend so far. Unsurprisingly, the two boys were soon thrown out. Then again, they had finished their homework, so Remus assumed this was just their way of making an exit.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus had never before been so unhappy about the idea of his approaching birthday. He hated knowing that James and the rest knew the date, that it would be near impossible to hide in the library ('on your birthday,' he could practically hear James and Sirius protest), or in any way avoid their attention. 

As his birthday fell on the Friday before the second Gryffindor match of the season, Remus' only hope was that James might be too busy to care much about anything else. Sirius and James seemed so attached at the hip by now that if James felt it necessary to put in extra practice the day before the match, Remus was sure Sirius would join him. 

One thing was clear, James' nerves were definitely starting to show:

'If I knew you'd be this insufferable I would have hexed you myself before the try-outs,' Sirius grumbled Thursday evening, 'for the love of Merlin: stop reorganising my stuff.'

'I am sure you will do well, James!' Peter said, from his bed.

'I know I'll be good,' James said, impatiently.

'"But will I be great?"' Sirius imitated James' voice.

'I don't need to be great... Just... I need to score - all the best chasers score in their first game. And I don't want to be the worst chaser out there either, so I want to score more than at least one other chaser.'

'I thought it was a team sport,' Remus said, feeling somewhat confused and forgetting his resolve to stay out of any conversation between the boys.

'It is and it isn't,' Sirius said, unhelpfully, 'right, Jim, this is for still going through my stuff: Locomotor Mortis.'

James' legs snapped together and he topped over. 

'Bed-time,' Sirius said brightly, and ignoring his friend's pleas for help, he closed the curtains.

'Remus? Pete?'

'I don't know the counter-curse,' Peter said.

'Just get my wand, it's over on my bed.'

Remus, however, did know the counter-curse. It seemed unnecessary not to help, so he waved his wand and muttered the words. 

'Thanks,' James said as he got up from the floor. 

'Here,' Peter offered him his wand, 'sorry I wasn't faster.'

'This works,' James said, grinning. 

Quick as a flash, James tore open the curtains to Sirius' bed and... found himself face to face with a Sirius that had clearly anticipated a counter attack. Before James could cast any spell, the two boys were wrestling on the floor. 

Remus watched them fight each other, feeling oddly removed from it all. 

/

'HAPPY BIRTHDAY!' 

It took a second before Remus realised that James Potter was pretty much sitting on top of him. So much for any of them forgetting his birthday...

'Cake!' the boy said happily, and once Remus accepted the plate, which held a gigantic piece of chocolate cake, James crawled off him and sat down on the edge of the bed instead. Sirius, who was standing next to the bed, handed James one of two plates he'd been carrying, and Peter sat down on Remus' other side with his own piece of chocolate cake.

'We didn't know what kind of cake you would prefer, but you can't go wrong with chocolate, can you?' James continued happily. 'Lulu helped us get the cake - well, she helped Master Sirius Black, Sir, but it goes for the same, doesn't it? And you've got presents too!'

Remus felt dazed at the attention he got that morning from a very talkative James, but also Sirius and Peter. The boys had even gotten him a brand new, warm, cloak.

Remus stuttered his thanks.

'Your old one didn't seem too effective,' James shrugged in a way that distinctly reminded Remus of Sirius. 

Remus felt both incredibly grateful and incredibly intimidated by the present. He had no idea how to ever repay something that nice. 

'No offense, mate, but you get ill a little too often as it is,' Sirius said, his lips having twitched slightly at James' shrug. 

'Yeah, we need to keep you wrapped up!' James agreed.

'It seems your parents agree too,' Sirius observed as Remus unwrapped a present from his mother and father: a knitted jumper and a knitted scarf, both in scarlet.

'This will be perfect for the match tomorrow,' Peter said. 

'Definitely!' James agreed, but for the first time that morning, his smile faltered somewhat.

Remus felt the some of his trepidation from the previous week leave him in that moment: 'And here I wasn't planning on watching the match,' Remus joked, making an effort to cheer up James.

Sirius grinned at Remus: 'I mean it'd be a bloody waste of time. I know for a fact that their new chaser is utter rubbish.' 

James protested at this, but not as fervently as Remus had expected. Remus and Sirius exchanged a quick look. So, some of today would be spent trying to keep James' mind off the match. Good thing they had the prefect distraction. 

'Alright, final present from mum and dad. I am guessing a book?' Remus held out the wrapped rectangular gift. Probably a second hand one.

'Definitely,' James and Sirius agreed in unison.

/

'Slytherin only scored fifty points in their first match against Ravenclaw,' James recapped eagerly that evening in the Gryffindor common room, 'and while they won the second match against Hufflepuff with a greater margin than would be ideal, Hufflepuff only scored a hundred points, which is forty less than we scored against them when we lost. So nobody is out of the running yet, and certainly not us. Even if Gryffindor doesn't score a single goal, and we just catch the Snitch, we'd be second in the standings - assuming-'

'- that Ravenclaw doesn't score 100 points - yeah, James, you've been over this before,' Sirius said, but for all his pretences to the contrary, Remus couldn't fail to hear the affection in Sirius' voice.

Remus on his part had not paid much attention to James' breakdown before now. The match between Slytherin and Hufflepuff had taken place on the Saturday before the fated Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson, and Remus hadn't attended it, choosing to catch up on school work. Then he hadn't really spoken much to the boys since that following Monday, so it was only now he realised that James was right. Gryffindor was still in with a chance for the cup. This piece of news excited Remus more than he had expected it to.

'Well, we know you won't score for shits, so it's a good thing we only need Robins to do her job,' Sirius said. He stuck out his tongue at James, who, having been restless all day, seemed to take this as an excuse to tackle Sirius to the ground. They rolled around the floor, neither getting much of an advantage over the other.

'Alright, that's enough you two,' came Frank Longbottom's voice as he approached Sirius and James. 'You're disturbing the peace and -'

'Let them fight! Let them fight!'

'There's no peace to be had the day before a match, you know that Longbottom!'

'Let them fight! Let them fight!'

'They're only playing!'

'Let them fight! Let them fight!'

Remus was surprised at the number of Gryffindors that had gotten invested in James and Sirius' wrestling. 

'I don't care,' came the voice of Fabian Prewett, 'I am with Longbottom on this one. Black, I can't have you wearing out my chaser the day before a match!' 

Remus saw Frank Longbottom look slightly taken aback by the support from Fabian Prewett.

'Thanks,' he heard Frank Longbottom say quietly to Prewett as the Gryffindors - including James and Sirius - accepted the orders of the Quidditch captain. 

'Don't mention it,' Prewett waved a hand, 'just... no points taken off them - alright? They're just letting off some steam before the match. It's Potter's first.'

Longbottom seemed displeased. Not, Remus thought, because he believed Longbottom would have taken points of the two, but more from being told what to do. In the end though, he nodded curtly.

'Don't look like that,' Prewett said, frowning. 'It's my job to look after my team, as much as it's your job to look after the students in general.'

'Shame, I was just getting started,' Sirius said, drawing Remus' attention back from Prewett and Longbottom. 'But I suspect Prewett saw the way you were getting your arse handed to you, and realised he had to step in.'

James picked up a piece of parchment, curled it into a ball and threw it at Sirius, who ducked, but not well enough. 

'Well, his aim is on point at least,' Sirius observed, brushing off the ball which had landed on his lap. 'But he still throws like a girl.'

'Any final birthday wishes Remus?' James asked, ignoring Sirius' last remark. 'We could sneak-'

'No sneaking!' came Fabian Prewetts' voice from over Remus' head. It seemed Remus wasn't the only one to eavesdrop on conversations.

'James Potter, you're not going to land yourself in detention before a match, do I make myself clear?'

'I can't decide if I like Prewett or not,' Sirius complained later as they made their way up to their dormitory. 'He helped us in Hogsmeade, but today he's been distinctly unfun.'

'He has a point,' James argued, 'imagine if we did get caught! I'd miss the match.'

'And that would be a tragedy for the ages,' Sirius said, but only so quietly that Remus heard it. 

Remus also knew better than believe Sirius to be, well, serious. 

/

Remus had always been an early riser, not necessarily because he needed less sleep than the average person (in fact, judging by how tired he felt, he was sure he needed more), but because his body seemed to be on immediate alert as soon as he stirred even marginally in the mornings, almost like it expected an attack. He couldn't remember if it had always been that way, but he suspected it came from when he was bitten. After all, Remus had been asleep when the wolf had crept into his bedroom. Had he been awake, things might have turned out differently.

James Potter on the other hand was an early riser by choice. He would set alarms to wake up, and as Remus knew James would sit up with Sirius long after the others had gone to bed, Remus had come to the conclusion that his bespectacled friend needed less sleep than the average person.

When Remus got up that Saturday morning, having been lying in bed for some time lamenting his inability to continue to sleep, he saw that Sirius and James were both fast asleep. They laid spread across the top of Sirius' duvet covers, curtains open. The two boys were still wearing the robes from the previous evening, and a chessboard lay between the sleeping bodies, chess pieces floating around them, like small boats in a harbour.  

It didn't take a genius to figure out what the two boys had been doing the previous evening. Nor did it take long for Remus to realise that James wouldn't have set an alarm, having fallen asleep before he got the chance.

'James?' Remus said tentatively, walking over. When Remus saw that calling James' name did nothing to wake his friend, he drew in a quick breath and shook the boy slightly.

James blinked a couple of times, then sat up so quickly it nearly made Remus jump back. 

'Blimey! What time is it?'

'Nearly half past seven,' Remus said.

James yawned, and stretched his arms: 'Right, thanks for waking me.'

At this, Sirius made a growling sort of noise.

'How are you feeling?'

James grimaced slightly: 'oh y'know.'

Remus really didn't know, but before he could respond, Sirius opened his eyes: 'Oi, you two morning monsters. Shut up!'

With that Sirius quite literally kicked James out of his bed.

It turned out that physically moving James around was going to be a feature of that morning.

'James, leave the chess pieces be and come down to breakfast with us,' Sirius practically begged a scarlet-robed James Potter later that morning. 

James was lying on the floor, attempting to pick up some chess pieces that had fallen under Sirius' bed.

'I've almost got all,' James panted as his outstretched arm moved back and forth as he groped for something that had to be just out of reach. 

'Remus, help me?' Sirius asked as he marched over to James. Remus followed.

Sirius grabbed the arm that wasn't groping under the bed, dragged James a few feet away from it and instructed Remus to follow suit. Remus grabbed the other, now free, arm just under the shoulder, and together they dragged James out of the dormitory, followed by Peter. 

Remus had never done anything of the like before. It was fun!

Once they got down to the common room, they let James go. Complaining about having been removed against his will, James nevertheless let Sirius lead the way to the great hall. From here they would eventually go on to watch James' first Quidditch match: Ravenclaw vs Gryffindor.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'It can't get worse than the last match, can it?' Gideon argued that morning at breakfast.

'We lost with fifty points last time. Things could absolutely go worse.' 

'Always the optimist, Fabian?' Jenny Robins said, elbowing him lightly.

'He's got no faith in your skills,' Jay Jordan winked at Jenny.

'I have every faith in all of you,' Fabian said, restraining himself from rolling his eyes. 'But I also know there's such a thing as bad luck... Besides, Ravenclaw is not to be taken lightly.'

'I dunno, I heard their captain is pretty rubbish,' said a voice behind Fabian and he turned to see Owen Redpath standing behind him, grinning nervously.

'Come to spy on us, just before the match?' Jenny asked.

'You can prove nothing,' Owen said, lifting up his hands as if held at wand point.

'Is that a challenge, Owen? I'm sure I've got some Veritaserum lying around somewhere.'

'Don't say stuff like that Robins, or Gideon is going to be forced to look into it,' Fabian said, his brain working in high gear to figure out what Owen was doing there. 

'Are you done with breakfast?' Owen asked Fabian. Fabian wasn't sure that he had been done, but now he certainly was. He nodded.

'Want to head down to the pitch together? I'm sure you'd like to get a view of the conditions as much as I would.'

'Sure,' Fabian said, feeling oddly nervous.

'As long as this isn't some plot to hex our captain before the match,' Jay said, crossing his arms. While he was smiling, he looked serious enough.

'I am an Eagle,' Owen said, 'if I wanted to take out your captain, you'd never see it coming.'

'How are we the ones with a reputation for being the cocky house?' Fabian heard Jenny complain to the others as Fabian left with Owen. Looking at his friend, he could see that Owen had heard the remark too. 

'I don't think I've ever been described as cocky in my entire life,' Owen said, grinning. 'Clearly, the pre-game nerves are working wonders for my confidence.'

/ 

'Conditions are excellent,' Owen observed as they walked around the pitch. 

'Overcast, not too windy. Should be a good game,' Fabian agreed.

'Ground is hard as rock though, so lets hope everyone stays in the air.' Owen threw Fabian a look of deepest scepticism.

'Eh, it is my job to knock people off their brooms. No judgement!'

'Technically, I think your job is to make sure your team is in possession of the Quaffle and catches the Snitch.'

'Technically, I think the opposing team's captain has no job telling me what my job is.'

Owen grinned: 'It's a good thing we've got the technicalities sorted.'

Fabian laughed. He wasn't really sure why. Except he felt elated. There was the upcoming match, naturally, but there was also this feeling of doing something you ought not to, walking around with the captain of the competing team, preparing for the match together. 

'Technically,' Fabian said, leaning in slightly as he lowered his voice, 'I don't think we're meant to be here together.'

'You're right,' Owen grinned, 'I am fraternising with the enemy.'

Then Owen's smile faltered.

'Everything alright?' Fabian asked. He hadn't said anything wrong, had he?

'Yeah, sure.'

With a sinking heart, Fabian recognised the dismissal: 'Lets go back to our changing rooms, shall we? It's nearly half past ten.'

They had walked back in silence and Fabian was just about to say goodbye, when Owen said: 'you heard about Sarah Morgan, didn't you?'

'Difficult not to hear about it. Besides, Richard's younger sister, Amelia is a good friend of Alice. But Morgan is okay, now I mean?'

The attack had happened on Valentine's Day.

'She's fit for the match, yes,' Owen said, running a finger through his dark curls. 'You heard why it happened?' 

Fabian had, and he felt like an idiot. Of course, this would feel personal to Owen too.

'They say it was because she's muggle-born.'

Owen gave Fabian a sad smile: 'worse... It's because she has the nerve to date a pureblood. Ruining the bloodline and all that.'

'She should have chosen a pureblood family that was already considered blood traitors. That's her mistake.'

'Yeah, because it's her fault,' Owen said coolly.

'That's not what - it was a joke.'

'Somehow it's not very funny, from where I am standing.'

Fabian mentally berated himself.  His words had been inappropriate and insensitive. The joke had been born out of fear, not malice. He didn't need Owen to have another reason not to want to date him.

Because Fabian had come to realise that was what he wanted. And a part of him was sure Owen wanted it too. They had spent too many stolen evenings flying together, doing their homework together or otherwise finding excuses to spend time in each other's company. 

The Bones' were on the blood traitor end of the spectrum, but not nearly as bad as the Prewetts. Nobody would consider it surprising if the Prewetts dated muggle-borns, even if Molly had married a pureblood and Gideon seemed to be going the same way. 

Fabian had no idea if not being able to marry - not being able to have children - because of what he was would make any relationship of his less criminal, or more criminal, in the eyes of people who cared about continuing the pureblood line. Given his blood traitor roots, he hadn't exactly been given a course in how to think like a blood purist.

'Owen, shit, sorry. Please. I didn't mean -'

'There you are, Redpath,' Ralph Davies said, strolling over to them together with his sister Helena, 'we thought we'd lost you! Prewett, ready for your second defeat this season?'

Fabian couldn't muster the mental energy to respond. He needed to speak to Owen - more, now.

'Careful, Davies,' Owen said, 'I wouldn't underestimate the competition.' 

Owen turned back to Fabian: 'I know,' he said hurriedly.

'What do we say in situations like these?' Fabian asked, trying to act normal as the two Davis siblings stopped next to Owen. 'I can't very well wish you luck.'

'May neither of us have bad luck,' Owen suggested, but Fabian could tell his heart wasn't in the conversation.  

'Well then,' Fabian said feeling awkward, 'I'll see you out there, won't I.' 

/

'Owen Redpath, captain of the Ravenclaw team, takes possession of the Quaffle immediately, passes it to Ralph Davies, who passes it back to Redpath, who passes it to Jill Boot, who throws the Quaffle but - yes, Jay Jordan of Gryffindor blocks the goalpost! A bit of a surprise there - but wait - Jordan fumbles the Quaffle and drops it! Redpath has got the Quaffle - Redpath could score here and he does! Ten-nil to Ravenclaw.'

And soon it was twenty-nil with Owen having scored his second goal. It seemed Owen, at least, was able to keep his head in the match. Fabian needed to get his shit together. He was Fabian Prewett, Gryffindor Quidditch captain and he'd be damned if he would lead his team to two losses. 

'Potter in possession, he passes to Ryan. Ryan moves up the field, passes to McLaggen, who looks like he wants to pass it back to Ryan but she's blocked by Davies. Potter is too far back. There's nothing for it, McLaggen will have to try to score, but ouch - being the slow thinker that he is, he has waited too long, a Bludger sent by Helena Davies stops the Gryffindor's latest pursuit, Ravenclaw in possession.'

In the lead up to the match, Potter had gone back to practicing on the school brooms in preparation for the game. No one knew if Potter was allowed to fly on brooms owned by older students, and nobody seemed keen to find out in case they were breaking a rule. However much Fabian had thought the chasers were prepared to have a first year on a school broom, he now saw the disadvantage it created for the team. 

So it seemed, did Bertha Jorkins: 'Seems the reshuffle of the Gryffindor team has merely left the team with a worse set of chasers. And worse equipped ones to boot, with the new Gryffindor chaser flying around on a school broom. Yet another piece of evidence that this sport is as much about money and resources as -'

'Jorkins -  the match!'

'Jay Jordan saves yet another attempt by the Ravenclaw chasers. At least the Gryffindor keeper is getting some practice,' Jorkins continued, sounding bored.

'Jordan passes to McLaggen, who passes to Ryan, who passes to McLaggen again.'

Fabian knocked a Bludger towards Owen to stop him from flying up and blocking Ciara Ryan. 

'Ryan in possession - Ryan is close to the goalposts, could this be it for Gryffindor? She - she passes the quaffle to McLaggen?' Jorkins sounded surprised.

'Who passes it to Potter,' McGonagall continued when it seemed like Jorkins was unable to.

'Who scores!!' Jorkins exclaimed, but a fair bit after the cheers from the crowd settled down. 'I don't believe it! James Potter is the first Gryffindor chaser to score, his slow progress up the pitch having been ignored by the Ravenclaw team. Well, they won't be making that mistake again!'

The Raveclaw team didn't make that mistake again. A while later the score stood eighty points to Ravenclaw to Gryffindor's forty. 

Ralph Davies was just catching the Quaffle when two people shot past him. The shock made him drop the Quaffle, and Potter, who to his credit seemed less distracted, caught it and passed it to McLaggen. 

'It seems like Jenny Robins has finally spotted the Snitch, Sarah Morgan is following in hot pursuit. It doesn't look too good for the Ravenclaw seeker, except -'

Fabian had been too busy not losing sight of the chasers (Ciara having just scored her third goal in the game) to pay enough attention to Jenny Robins and her chase after the Snitch. Fabian was sure Jenny had seen the Bludger pelting towards her, but she didn't alter her course. The Bludger collided with Jenny's head. 

Something wasn't right. Jenny was still holding onto her broom with one hand, but her flying seemed unsteady and she seemed to be slipping off her broom. Fabian threw himself on his broom to make it go faster. He had to get to her. Owen's words from before the match rang in his ears: 'Ground is hard as rock though, so lets hope everyone stays in the air.'

Fabian caught up with Jenny just in time. Catching his seeker, he managed, however clumsily, to get them onto the ground safely.

Any moment now the Ravenclaws would start to cheer, as Morgan must have caught the Snitch. But Fabian didn't care. Jenny was safe. He pressed her closer to him, noticing how his body shook, and looked down. 

Jenny's eyes were unfocused, but she grinned up at him, a tiny golden ball in her right hand. 

'I got it,' Jenny said vaguely, before her eyes rolled backwards and her body went limp. 

'I've got you,' Fabian promised quietly as he lowered her to the ground, looked around for a teacher and, to make sure they all realised the match was over, lifted the walnut-sized ball in the air.

/

Fabian sent the rest of the team back to the Gryffindor common room with instructions to celebrate. He believed professor McGonagall's reassurance that Jenny would be fine and he knew that having lots of people around her would not be good for her recovery. Naturally, he and her brother Geoffery remained by Jenny's side until she regained consciousness. 

Madam Pomfrey had done a good job healing her, but head injuries remained head injuries and Jenny was likely to spend a couple of nights in the Hospital Wing. Knowing she was awake and in safe hands with her brother, Fabian left the two.

'How is she?' 

Owen was standing just outside the Hospital Wing. Right, while Jenny was in the year below them, Fabian had forgotten that the two were friends.

'She'll be alright. If you want to, you can see her. Madam Pomfrey isn't throwing anyone out, just yet.'

Fabian barely recognised his own voice. It felt flat. It was as if the argument from earlier wrapped around them like a suffocating blanket. 

'Is she alone?' Owen asked, seeming to consider the matter and not meeting Fabian's eyes.

'No, her brother is with her.'

'That's alright then,' Owen said quickly.

They both remained standing there. Owen looked unsure of himself, nothing like the person Fabian had inspected the pitch with before the match. 

What was happening? Fabian had made a distasteful joke, but nothing more. It was probably not the last time he'd do such a thing. He was sorry, but not that sorry. 

'Look, if this is about earlier, with the joke -' Fabian started.

'The joke?' Owen looked confused. 'Oh that, no. That's ... okay. I'm sure you didn't mean anything by it.'

But I did. I wanted you to know you shouldn't be put off dating me, Fabian thought. 

Before Fabian could work out what to say, Owen said: 'you shouldn't have let her fly into the Bludger like that. I get that you want to win, but Jenny could have been seriously injured.'

Wait, what?!

'It was your beater who sent the Bludger after her,' Fabian said, trying to keep the anger out of his voice. 

Did Owen really believe Fabian wanted Jenny to take such risks? Fabian felt terrible seeing Jenny in that bed. He hated it! But the accusation was so out of place from the Ravenclaw captain Fabian didn't even bother making that point,

'It was meant to impede her progress!' 

'Listen to me, Redpath, I am a beater. When I hit a Bludger I full well know there's a risk that the person I aim at can get seriously injured! You can't expect everyone to see the Bludger - and even when they see it, they won't always dodge it. And sometimes that's fine and results in a slight bruise, sometimes it is not fine. That's on the beater and on the player. Everyone knows the risks of playing Quidditch.'

This was a ridiculous conversation. 

'All I'm saying is that you should talk to your team - make sure they've got their priorities right.'

How dare he?! Did Owen really think Fabian wasn't planning on doing just that?

'And you should resign as captain if you can't handle the game!' Fabian retorted.

Owen glared at him: 'Yeah, the muggle-born who just doesn't get it, right?'

That wasn't what Fabian had meant. Or was it? Would Regina Hooch stand here in Owen's place? Somehow Fabian doubted this very much.

'Screw this, I am out,' Fabian said, leaving Owen. 

Knowing there would be a party in the common room, Fabian left for Hagrid's instead. He hoped that tea with the game keeper might make him feel a little better.

Fabian had been wrong, of course. Hagrid's praise of the match and eager discussion of Gryffindor's chances of winning the cup just served to make Fabian even more miserable. He should be happy, and yet he wasn't.

It didn't help that Fabian later learned Owen had been just as nasty towards his own beater. Nor did it help much when Alice reminded him that Owen had probably just been stressed: Jenny was one of his closer friends. 

Owen's own apology helped a little, once he worked up the courage a week later, but even so, it felt like something had broken. As much as Fabian told Gideon and Alice it didn't matter, as much as he wanted it to be true, the reality was that the loss of Owen's friendship - the thoughts of what could have been - haunted Fabian. 

Gryffindor was second in the standing and everyone expected Fabian to be in high spirits. He occasionally overheard Gideon explaining to others that Fabian was just stressed, now the cup was within reach, and others still had found out that Fabian had done abysmally in his apparition lessons so far. Slowly, people accepted that Fabian wanted to be left alone, and stopped stopping him to discuss Gryffindor's chances in the corridors.

However, at least Gryffindor's chances gave him an excuse to push his team harder, giving him less time to ponder how quickly things could sour.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Come on, mate, cheer up! You weren't the worst chaser out there,' Sirius tried to reason.

'I so was.'

'McLaggen only scored one goal too, and he did it after you,' Peter said. 

James groaned into his pillow - why wouldn't they just let him be? He wished he had drawn the curtains of his four poster bed, but no, Sirius would just have opened them again.  

'McLaggen played a vital role in all of Ciara's goals,' James tried to explain as he rolled over to face his three friends.

'That's funny,' Remus said, smiling ever so slightly, 'I seem to remember that it was you who took the ball from Davies so that Ryan could score that final goal.'

'The Quaffle,' Peter shot in, looking pleased with himself for some reason.

'Sod this. I am going to go downstairs to enjoy the party,' Sirius said. 'What do I care if you want to stay here and sulk.'

'I am not sulking!'

James wasn't sulking, was he? The others just didn't understand how much more potential James could have shown - had he just flown better - or had a better broom. 

'Are!'

'Am not!' 

'Prove it!'

'There's nothing to prove!'

Nice try Sirius. James wasn't going to fall for that. He crossed his arms.

'Well, I have an idea for getting back at Jorkins for being annoying, so if you're truly not sulking...' Sirius let the sentence hang in the air.

James felt the familiar excitement which accompanied one of Sirius' ideas: 'Go on,' he said. 

Without really thinking about it, James sat up. Sirius crawled onto James' bed, his grey eyes bright with excitement.

'I have been practicing the amplifying spell - Sonorus, you know the one. That banshee likes to gossip - lets give her a larger audience!'

'Brilliant!' James grinned. 'If she has something to share, she must share it with all of us.'

'You are sure she won't just immediately use the counter-spell?' Remus asked frowning. 

Sirius grinned, shaking his head: 'Mate, she has dungs for brains that one!'

Naturally, Sirius had been right! Sirius and James found her quietly gossiping in a corner with two girls that James thought were in the year above him and Sirius. Sirius kept his distance as he whispered: 'Sonorus.'

Jorkins startled as her voice was magically amplified. Every face in the common room turned towards her, and she went bright red and very quiet. Once everyone had looked away, Jorkins tried to talk again, and her voice rang out for a second time. 

Peter and a couple of others burst out laughing, which was good, because Sirius looked like he would explode if he kept fighting back his own laugh, tears of mirth rolling down his cheeks. Once James and Sirius joined in the ever-growing crowd of giggling and laughing students, they found it hard to remain upright, clinging to each other while their lungs screamed for air.

It was brilliant! 

Sirius' spell was not as powerful as James had witnessed at some of Sarah's Quidditch matches but it did the job. Jorkins could not share anything that evening without the whole of Gryffindor hearing it. 

'Whoever cast that spell on the hag deserves an Order of Merlin if you ask me,' Tiberius McLaggen told James, who tried to look as if he had no idea who deserved the praise. 'She spends far too much time whispering lies, sneaking around, trying to catch people in some compromised position or other. I wouldn't be surprised if she blackmailed people with the information she's got - but... er... I wouldn't know of course. Anyways, well played, Potter.'

Bertha Jorkins went to bed early that evening. James was sure many of the students had to know the counter-spell, and yet nobody seemed particularly keen to interfere. Not even Gideon Prewett or Frank Longbottom could be seen to rush to her defences. 

Even more laughter was shared among the Gryffindors when they could hear her snore a few hours later. Unfortunately, this turned out to be the point someone did take pity on Jorkins, but by then she had provided enough entertainment for one evening.

'Serves her right,' Sirius grinned, when Remus suggested the joke hadn't been that funny. 'She should have spent more time learning magic, shouldn't she?'

/

Fabian Prewett seemed more determined than ever to push the team to victory and practice increased to four times a week. James was sure Fabian would have wanted to fit in even more practice, but as the Quidditch cup was wide open, the Gryffindor captain wasn't the only one to force their team to practice in all sorts of conditions. 

James on his side was just relieved Prewett didn't replace him with someone that had access to a better broom. 'Don't be stupid,' Fabian had said when James let slip his surprise. 

As March came to a close, the weather did get warmer but as the rain and wind kept attacking the players in equal measure, James felt convinced he wouldn't feel truly warm until June. 

James birthday was excellent, when it finally arrived. Although, as James scanned the letters and birthday cards that morning from his grandfather, aunts and uncles, Sarah, Carl and his parents, he had to admit he missed them all. It was weird celebrating turning twelve without them. 

There were so many presents though, and James enlisted his friends to help him get through them all at a decent speed. There were books - including a particularly interesting one on chaser strategies from Sarah, a pair of Quidditch gloves from his friends, robes, sweets, joke products (from Carl and Sarah), and, most excitingly of all, the promise of a new broom from his parents, which he could help pick out over the summer. 

Just as it had been on Remus' birthday, James' friends had got hold of a delicious chocolate cake. Once James was finished with his own piece, he got the rest of Remus' too, who, looking rather pale again, didn't want to eat it all. 

'It's okay to miss your family,' Remus said quietly when Sirius and Peter were in the showers. 

James hadn't realised that he had been staring at the cards and letters again. It was strange, usually he'd found cards to be the boring part of one's birthday, but now his family wasn't there, the scribbled birthday messages held a new appeal. 

Just then Peter ran into the room, eyes wide and the towel he was wearing nearly falling off him: 'James! There's been an accident! We were just - Sirius fell and hit his head!'

James was on his feet before he was even aware of it: 'get professor McGonagall!' James told Remus. 

James found Sirius on the floor, his eyes barely open, his upper body half propped up against the wall of the shower. Carefully, James helped him up, scanning his friend's head for any visible signs of injury. 

'Sirius, hey, I've got you,' James tried to keep his voice calm.

'Nah... I've got you!'

Sirius' eyes were suddenly alert and mischievous - and wide open. Too late, James registered the water drenching his robes, as his friends arms wrapped around him and trapped him in the shower.

Eventually, Sirius released him. Not knowing any drying spells, James pulled off his wet robes, much to Sirius' glee: 'you should learn to take your clothes off before you shower, mate.'

Hanging up the wet bundle of clothes back in their dormitory, James noticed Remus hadn't gone for professor McGonagall, thankfully. Peter must have told him it was a birthday prank - just a big joke. Except... James didn't find it funny.

Rationally, he could see the brilliance of Sirius' plan, but finding Sirius in the shower like that... James had been - what? - worried? Yes, that was exactly it. How could Sirius fail to see that such a lie would have scared James - if only a little.

Too soon, James' birthday came to an end, and then, one day later, Remus had some bad news:

'My nan is very ill. They say... well, in any case, mum and dad have agreed I can come and visit for a few days... to say goodbye.'

Remus' voice was quiet, he didn't meet any of their eyes, and he looked very pale indeed.

'Is she your grandmother on your mother or father's side?' James asked, realising he didn't know this.

Remus hesitated: 'mum's.'

'Is she in a muggle hospital?' 

James had heard about those. They had "cotdors" who cut people up and prodded people with long sharp needles. 

'She's...-'

'Oh leave the boy alone James,' Sirius cut in. 'You can tell us about muggle hospitals another day, Remus. We've got to hurry if we plan to set off stink pellets in the changing rooms before the Slytherin Quidditch team arrive.'

'Oh I forgot!'

Luckily Sirius, James and Peter managed to get to the changing rooms in time and between them, they made sure there was not a single room available to the snakes that didn't smell terrible.

'The green smoke does complement the team's robes quite well, don't you think?' Sirius asked casually as they walked back to the castle.

They had waited, remaining hidden from view, to see the Slytherin Quidditch team arrive and they had heard and seen enough to know the prank had been a great success. 

'It's almost a shame they won't know it's us,' James said. 

'They'll know it's you beating them when Gryffindor wins the final match - and that's good enough for me,' Sirius said. His eyes seemed to darken: 'that'll show them all!'

James had an odd feeling Sirius wasn't simply talking about the students at school. The expression was familiar to James as the one his best friend used when talking about his family. 

However, Gryffindor's chances would take a definite, and serious, turn for the worse. With all this practice, the various house teams started coming down with the flu. 

James spent two feverish nights in the Hospital Wing just after the Easter holidays. To nobody's surprise, Remus, who had come back after a couple of days away, ended up catching the flu too, spending a whole five days with Madam Pomfrey. Neither James nor Remus were allowed visitors as the beds were full of students - mostly Quidditch players and their friends.

At first, nobody seemed particularly worried when the Gryffindor Quidditch practices were cancelled for a couple of weeks due to all the illness going around in the team. This seemed to be the case for all the houses. 

But when Remus returned from the Hospital Wing he brought some bad news: 'Prewett - Fabian, he's been transferred to St Mungo's.'

'WHAT?!'

'Keep your voices down, all of you,' Remus pleaded. 

Remus had somehow managed to drag them all to the library. He rarely asked for help, but having missed classes both due to his grandmother and this flu, Remus seemed anxious about getting on top of their school work again. 

'But why?' James asked. What could St Mungo's do that Madam Pomfrey could not? It was just a flu. Even muggles had the flu.

'You remember what Bertha Jorkins told us,' Remus said in a low voice, 'Fabian was really unwell before Hogwarts. It seems his body still doesn't take well to getting sick.'

'A bit like you,' Peter observed, and James had to agree. 

Remus shook his head: 'I'll admit I probably don't have the best immune system, but this is bad - really bad.'

'How do you know?' Sirius asked curiously.

'Not hard to overhear, Fabian was in the bed across from mine,' Remus muttered.

'But he'll be alright?'

James liked Fabian a lot. He had to be okay. They had the Quidditch cup and Fabian had his brother and sister, and that girl he was always with: Alice.

Remus rubbed his eyes: 'It was a tough night for him, for Madam Pomfrey too, but the healers at St Mungo's should be able to take care of him.'

'Let's hope so,' Peter said, looking anxious.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

The two following evenings continued to see the boys in the library. As Sirius had become bored of sitting around, James suggested a game that would keep Sirius and him in the library that third evening, while making the experience less dull. Both promised Remus that they were still available should he need anything and then they left the table to start looking for books. 

The game was a simple one. They would find a book each per professor, which they then had to argue best represented that professor. They had got Peter to agree to be an objective third voice, if there was a disagreement of who won any particular round. 

James had found a book titled Forgotten discoveries in 1400s Wales, which he thought sounded like the sort of boring and unimportant stuff that Professor Binns liked. He had also found the perfect book for Madame Maxwell, and he was just looking for something that would represent Professor Sprout when his attention was caught by a voice he recognised.

'Prewett,' the Ravenclaw captains voice sounded like it was on the other side of the bookshelf. 'Is it true?'

'Is what true, Redpath?' Gideon's voice was icy cold, and a little tired.

'Fabian - is he really in St Mungo's?'

'Yes.'

'And - how is he?'

'Dying, clearly. That's why I am sat here doing my homework.'

'Don't-'

'Alice,' Gideon's voice cut across Redpath, 'I am done for today. I'll see you tomorrow in Potions. I suppose I'll see you there too, Redpath.'

James could hear the sounds of belongings being gathered: the closing of ink bottles, parchment being rolled, books being closed. From what James could tell, Gideon was in a hurry.

'Redpath, wait!'

That Alice girl grabbed Redpath who was just passing by the passage of shelves where James stood. Quickly, James grabbed a random book and opened it. 

'Don't take it personally,' Alice said. 

'Oh, am I to assume he treats everyone like this?' 

'Can't you imagine how scared he must feel?'

'But Fabian will be alright, right? Prewett - Gideon - he just said -'

'It looks that way, yes.'

Out of the corner of James' eyes, he saw Redpath cover his face. 

'It's okay,' Alice said with a soothing voice and stepped forward, giving the Ravenclaw captain a hug.

'Alice, did I leave -' Gideon's voice caught them all by surprise.  

Alice let go of Redpath so quickly it looked like she had been burned. Redpath in turn disappeared within the blink of an eye.

'Gideon,' Alice said quickly and moved behind the bookshelf again. 

'He doesn't deserve your kindness. It's his fault -'

'It's not his fault,' Alice said. 'Gid, I get it, I really do. It's much easier to convince yourself that Fabian was weak already, worn out, susceptible to any serious illness, than to accept that this can happen. That it most likely will happen again. That however much we want this to be over, it probably never will.'

'What if it does end Alice?' Gideon asked quietly, his voice so different from the confident Gryffindor beater and prefect James knew. 'Just because he will make it this time, who's to say what happens next time?'

'Don't say that.'

'I can't bear the thought... When they came to get me, to tell me he was being moved... that I should come too... Alice, I was so sure... so damn sure...'

James was positively confident Gideon was crying. 

It sounded like Alice might be hugging Gideon - or the prefect was covering his own face - as James could hear some muffled sobs. 

'I'm so sorry you had to go through that.'

'If only I hadn't -'

'Don't go there. It wasn't anyone's fault back then either. It was rotten luck.'

'Why him?'

'Well, you know what he would say?'

Gideon let out a weak laugh: ''course I do: "why not me".'

After some quiet moments, Alice said: 'Can we at least let Redpath off the hook?'

When James couldn't hear the reply, he moved a little further down the bookshelf. 

'You don't want to hear my opinion on that,' Alice warned, her voice gentle.

'I always want to hear what you think, Alice.'

'Okay,' Alice sighed, 'I think Fabian is at fault for their continued fall out, not Redpath. Not that it's really anyone's fault...'

'You're going to have to explain that one to me.'

'Listen, the way Redpath behaved after the match wasn't nice, but he apologised and I think he had a perfectly good reason to be a bit out of line. He was scared for that Robins girl. A bit like you're behaving now with Fabian, one could argue.'

'Or one could not argue that... if one wanted to avoid losing the argument.' 

James could tell Gideon was feeling a bit better, his voice was firmer and if not entirely playful, then at least void of pain.

'Yes, well,' Alice agreed.

'So what you're saying is that Fabian was a bit stupid. Have you told Fabian that?'

'I have, as a matter of fact. But... er... I think for Fabian - well, you know him better than I do, but...'

'Out with it Al,' Gideon said and there was definite warmth in his voice by now. 'I know that look. What wisdom will you impart today?'

Alice sighed. 'Who does Fabian hang out with? You and me, right? Sometimes Marshall. Of course he has the team, and he - well, we all - surround ourselves with other people. I drag Amelia along some times, sometimes you two bring along Jay, but most of the time it's us three.' 

'Alright, I am following so far, but what has that got to do with -'

'I think Fabian is used to this idea that we know everything about him. His argument with Redpath isn't about what Redpath said, it's about how wrong he got the measure of Fabian. Fabian would never have put the team's performance above Robins' health. She knows that, naturally, and I am sure she has put Redpath right, but in Fabian's eyes, she shouldn't have needed to. Redpath should just have known, because in Fabian's eyes, people who care about you, know this stuff already.'

A long silence followed this.

'You're brilliantly smart, you know that, Alice,' Gideon murmured so quietly James could barely hear him.

'I have my moments,' Alice said. 'Now, you're done for the night. So am I. Let's go for a quick walk to the lake. I could do with some fresh air.' 

'Oh come on,' Alice added, 'I know you want to be easy to find should there be any news - so do I, but we won't be gone for long. Fabian wouldn't want you to hide away in the castle.'

'No, Fabian would be very encouraging of our walk,' Gideon muttered once it sounded like Alice had left to put away some books.

James decided it was time to return to the real task at hand. At this rate, Sirius would have a considerable advantage. 

/

'Not bad,' Sirius remarked at the book James had chosen for professor Binns. 'But not nearly as good as this.'

Sirius held up a copy of The records of Hunydd Hufflepuff. 

'You don't even know who she is.'

'I do,' James said quickly, his brain working furiously. 'She's...'

Sirius raised his eyebrows.

'She's Helga Hufflepuff's grandmother. She just about managed to see her granddaughter before she passed?'

'For Merlin's sake, why do you know this?'

'Because I am the most brilliant person alive.'

'Still, it's a better book for Binns,' Sirius argued, after having thrown the book at James, who had caught it.

James flicked through the pages as if Sirius had actually meant to pass him the book, not hit him with it. 

'Fine, you win that one,' James conceded. 'I want to fall asleep already. But this,' James continued as he pulled out the book he had found for Madame Maxwell, 'is definitely going to be a winner.'

'"Flirting with darkness: ethical considerations of an Auror,"' Sirius read aloud, 'You'd love to flirt with Madame Maxwell, wouldn't you?'

'She's old - as is this joke.'

'Old is not the same as irrelevant,' Remus said innocently, looking unexpectedly up from his homework. 

'You should know that with your parents,' Sirius smirked at James. 

Peter stifled a laugh as Madam Pince came by.

'Hilarious, the lot of you,' James grumbled. 'But listen, she was all secretive about that werewolf killing -' 

Here James had to stop as Remus accidentally knocked over some ink. James luckily sat next to Remus and was able to pick it up before the black liquid had gone everywhere, but a fair bit had spilled over Remus' parchment. 

'It's okay, I had only just started that piece,' Remus said quickly.

'Alright, well,' James turned to Sirius again, 'what do you think?'

'I think Remus is terrified of werewolves, that's what I think,' Sirius said, but hours later, when James and Sirius decided to sneak into the kitchen for a late night snack. 

/

James couldn't believe it when he found himself knocking on the door to Madame Maxwell's office the following Saturday. Try as he might, he wasn't quite sure how this had come to be.

On a dare from Sirius, James had checked out Flirting with darkness: ethical considerations of an Auror from the library and placed it in front of him during the following Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson. Sirius was convinced Madame Maxwell would either not notice the book, or be deeply disturbed by the title. James was sure she'd be interested, and James had been right, much to Sirius' annoyance.  

'Ze book, do you like it?' Madame Maxwell asked as James stayed behind after the class.

'I love it,' James lied. The book made a great deal about whether some actions were truly right or actually wrong, when the reality was a lot simpler. Murder and torture was wrong, but Aurors had to be allowed to kill - provided there was no other option - because they were fighting the dark arts.

'Are you zinking about becoming an Auror perhaps?'   

'Er... maybe?'

'Maybe?'

'If I am not good enough to play for England, being an Auror could be grand. Or a curse-breaker.'

'But of course, with your brain, 'ow could you not be attracted to the mysterious. You 'ave got anozer class now, non?'

'Nothing important!' James said before he could stop himself. For a moment, noticing her frown, James had wished he had lied and told her no, but then, she had invited him over for tea over the weekend instead.

That was why Madame Maxwell looked up smiling as she saw him enter her office: 'Bonjour mon petit, 'ow nice it is to see you.'

James' smile faltered as he took in her office: 'are you leaving professor?'

The office was sparsely decorated and in the corner stood two trunks full of robes, stacks of parchments, books and funny instruments. 

'Ah non,' Madame Maxwell must have followed James' eyes. 'Zat belongs to ze late professor Flump. I 'ave promised to look after his belongings until 'is sister 'as time to go zrough it. She 'as asked me to keep it until the end of the summer term. I do not mind, for I do not 'ave much myself.'

'Does Hogwarts pay you that badly?' James asked, feeling astonished and horrified all at once. But then, her robes were immaculate, and surely being an Auror had paid well even if Hogwarts did not?

Madame Maxwell laughed as she poured hot water into two tea mugs: 'Non, mon petit, it is by choice. I do not like 'aving lots of zings.' 

'What's this?' James asked, pointing at a toy niffler - one of the very few items in the room.

'Memories,' Madame Maxwell said. 'Now, the tea, it weel get cold. Also, I got some cake. I 'eard it was your birzday, not zat long ago.'

Nearly three weeks - James' birthday had been ages ago. But James wasn't about to turn down cake. 

'Thank you, professor,' he said, as he took a seat opposite her. 

James had never really struggled to talk to adults, but Madame Maxwell had previously been the exception to that rule. However, that afternoon the conversation felt easy as Madame Maxwell shared even more stories about her time as an Auror, and James told her all about the current standings in the House Quidditch Cup.

Having left the office, James took out the piece of parchment that Lily had given him - he knew it by heart, of course, but he made it a habit to look at it from time to time. Her handwriting was very pretty - unnecessarily so, but nonetheless. 

James traced the names of the missing muggle-borns. Was professor Flump somehow involved? James didn't know. However, it was interesting indeed to know that until the end of term, James could access Professor Flump's belongings - provided he could gain access to Madame Maxwell's office while avoiding detection.

/

The weekend continued to be a good one, as Sunday evening found Fabian Prewett back at Hogwarts. James, Peter, Sirius and Remus had all been out flying, taking advantage of the rare spring sunshine. Returning to the common room, they couldn't fail to notice the red-headed boy, who despite the warmer than usual weather had a blanket over him and who was surrounded by much of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. 

'James, look who is back,' Jenny exclaimed, sitting on the floor and leaning against Fabian's feet.

'We knew they couldn't keep him for long,' Jay Jordan grinned, sitting to the left of Fabian, and clapping him on the shoulder.

'While you lot have been doting over my frail brother, Potter here has had the sense to get some good practice in, unless I am very much mistaken,' Gideon said on Fabian's right, his smile the broadest of them all.

'Only flying,' James said quickly, realising just then that his friends had already abandoned him and gone upstairs.

'Which is far more than this useless lot has done,' Fabian said. 

Fabian looked pale, his robes were hanging loosely on the frame of his body, and more than anything, he looked like he hadn't slept for days. In other words, Fabian looked frail, just like Gideon had said. It was in that moment James understood that while Fabian might be back at school, their Quidditch captain would not return to the pitch just yet.

'Practice resumes next week,' Gideon said, as if he was reading James' mind, 'I've done a lousy job as deputy captain so far, but that ends now.'

'Who went and made you anything?' Jenny asked. 'And "deputy captain" I ask you? That's not a real thing.'

'Actually, Gid wanted "supreme deputy leader", but I talked him down,' Fabian said as he took off his blanket. 'Listen it's been lovely seeing you all but ...'

'You need your beauty sleep,' Jay finished for him.

Fabian shrugged awkwardly as Jenny moved out of the way. 

'We all could use some more of that,' Jenny said.

'It's a good thing Fabian didn't pick us for our beauty,' Gideon agreed as the two brothers got up.

'If I had, only Jenny would have made it of you lot,' Fabian mumbled loudly enough for all to hear.

'I will have you know that I once modelled for Witch Weekly,' Jay protested.

'Yeah, for a baby shampoo ad,' Gideon said, 'careful Jay, I've got the photo somewhere.'

'Oh please bring it to the next practice!' Jenny pleaded.

'You must!' James agreed.

'Alright,' Gideon grinned. 'Night all.'

'It's all the same to me,' Jay shrugged, leaning back. 'But I warn you Jen, I look exceedingly handsome in that photo.'

'So what changed?' James asked innocently.

Jenny giggled and Jay threw a pen at him, which James dodged easily. It felt good seeing his team mates smile again. 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Sirius couldn't fathom how everyone's families kept dying but his family remained in excellent health. In the final week of April Remus learned that his grandmother had passed away. Albeit expected news at this point, Remus looked pale on the Friday he received the news, eating very little and leaving immediately after their History of Magic lesson. 

Sirius, James and Peter weren't quite sure what to do, so they mostly went about things as normal, and hoped that if Remus needed something, he'd let them know. Sirius got the impression that Remus hadn't been that keen on talking about his grandmother, and that suited Sirius just fine.

Remus returned just before lessons on Monday, 1 May. Despite Remus' insistence that they needed to spend the weekend revising for the upcoming exams, they managed to drag him to see the Ravenclaw vs Hufflepuff match, which took place the first weekend he was back. After all, having lost a grandmother was the sort of thing one might want to forget about, and Quidditch was an excellent way of forgetting, even when one's name wasn't James Potter.

Sirius heard James groan as Sarah Morgan caught the Snitch, making it a crushing victory of 250 to 30 to Ravenclaw.

'Remind me what that means for your match?' Sirius asked. He could do the maths, naturally, but he knew James would have been thinking about this endlessly.

As expected, James didn't even need a second to consider Sirius' question: 'We will need 200 points to beat Ravenclaw, as would Slytherin as we're tied for points at the moment.'

'Well, better you than me,' Sirius said earnestly, 'but at least neither will want the Snitch to appear immediately.'

'Nah, but it does mean chasers are gonna be prime targets for injuries,' Ciara Ryan said, turning around to join in the conversation. 'One chaser taken out off the game could make all the difference. You should be alright though James, you're just a wee babby and they know that.'

James seemed affronted at the idea of him not being as much as a target as the rest of the chasers, but Sirius could tell that Remus and Peter felt differently - as did Sirius.

'At least Fabian and that Redpath bloke seems to be friends again,' James said, and Sirius turned to see what James was looking at. Fabian Prewett had run onto the pitch and hugged the Ravenclaw captain, the Gryffindor captain being the first outside of the Ravenclaw team to do so.

Sirius hadn't known they were friends to begin with, and he didn't feel particularly interested in learning what kind of fall out they had had, so instead he said: 'Prewett looks better than when he first came back, doesn't he?'

'Aye, much better.'

'He is back to playing now, isn't he?' Peter asked.

'Yes, Pete, Merlin, James told us so at the start of the week,' Sirius said, feeling the familiar annoyance at Peter's poor memory. 

However, on Sunday, Sirius and James got something more important to worry about than Peter's terrible memory. 

'Looking for your half-blood brat of a friend,' sneered Walden Macnair as Sirius and James were making their way through the entrance hall. 

They had planned to see if Hagrid was in his hut, and willing to entertain them with a cup of tea. Sirius was also quite excited at the idea of seeing Thunder again. His parents loathed animals, barely tolerating their own family owl, but Sirius had always enjoyed them, and Thunder had slowly gained a special place in his heart.

Macnair was a tall, black-haired seventh year Slytherin, whom Sirius had not given much thought to before. The Blacks had very little to do with the Macnairs, who were neither rich nor influential. What Macnair could want with him and James - or any of their friends was beyond Sirius. 

'You have to be more specific than that,' Sirius said, trying to sound unconcerned.

The two most obvious suspects were Remus and Peter, and as they had just left Remus in the library, there was a real chance this moron was talking about Peter.

'We've got more than one friend,' James agreed, looking at Macnair with undisguised distaste, and refusing to engage with the fact that Macnair had narrowed it down by mentioning blood status.

Not that Macnair had truly narrowed down anything. Sirius had three friends, and with James by his side, Macnair could only really be speaking about Peter or Remus, both of whom were half-blood. 

But then that wasn't strictly speaking true for James, who also had the Quidditch team and who seemed to get along swimmingly with Maeve Ryan too. Although, that wasn't difficult considering how much Maeve and James both liked Quidditch. 

'Well, that's your look-out, innit,' Macnair said gleefully. 'Just remember when you find him that it's nothin' personal. I was just doin' a favour for a friend who's position makes it... challenging for him to deal with brats like you himself.' 

'And where can we find our friend?' Sirius asked coolly, raising his wand, noticing that James did the same beside him. 

Macnair laughed. It was a cruel, brutish laugh that Sirius was sure many would find intimidating, but Sirius had never been scared of bullies. 

'I don't like repeating my questions, Macnair,' Sirius said, sounding in his own ears exactly like the Black heir his family wished he was.

'What's going on?' came a voice. 

Out of the corner of Sirius' eye, he could see James' head turn quickly. James did not relax his grip on his wand, which told Sirius that it wasn't necessarily good news.

'Potter, Walden, care to explain yourselves?'

So whoever it was did not know who Sirius was, which could have been a good thing, but the fact that he knew James and, more importantly, seemed to be on a first name basis with Macnair did not promise well.

The person who walked to stand between them was another tall student with brown hair and green eyes. He was wearing a prefect badge which explained, Sirius thought, his interference. Sirius also thought he might be on the Slytherin Quidditch team, but he wasn't sure.

'I was telling the snotty brats not to pick fights they cannot win,' Macnair sneered.

'Where is he?' Sirius pushed, ignoring the new person. If Macnair had hurt Peter, they needed to find him.

'Where's who?' the newcomer asked. 

'How should I know?' Macnair shrugged dismissively, but he was unable to stop a nasty smile from spreading across his face.

'Diggory! Thank Merlin, come, please!' 

This time, Sirius recognised the voice and face of Slytherin first year Gareth Greengrass. The tall prefect looked bewildered as he turned to Greengrass.

'What is it, Greengrass?'

'There's a boy, he's been hexed, I think. Or cursed. He's not moving. I don't know what happened.' Only now did it seem that Greengrass recognised Sirius and James. 'He's their friend - Pittygrew or something,' Greengrass said, pointing at the two of them. 

Sirius and James had already started running towards the dungeons, which was where Greengrass had come from. 

'C'mon!' James said, turning around to make sure Diggory and Greengrass followed them. They needed Greengrass to show the way, and as much as Sirius hated the idea of relying on what was clearly a snake prefect, they might very well need a prefect too.

/

'Hi, how are you feeling?' Remus asked gently as Peter finally opened his eyes, an hour after he had first been brought to the Hospital Wing.

As soon as Peter had been brought to Madam Pomfrey, James had run to find Remus. While Remus had originally told Sirius and James that he had not intended to leave the library save for meal times that day, now that the exams were close, James had not been mistaken in assuming that all that changed once the news reached him about Peter.

Peter looked around the room, his eyes wide with shock. The small boy's lips started to tremble and Sirius found himself looking away. He hated the fact that someone like Macnair had hurt Peter. Pathetic, weak Peter. How could anyone go after him?

'W-what happened?'

'We were sort of hoping you could tell us that,' Remus said kindly.

Sirius had to hand it to Remus, his voice was calm, and he seemed surprisingly at ease in a situation Sirius found extremely challenging.

'We think Macnair might have attacked you,' James continued. 

'It's okay if you don't remember,' Remus added. Then, when Peter still didn't say anything, Remus asked: 'Do you need us to get Madam Pomfrey?'

Sirius felt James shift anxiously beside him. Sirius turned towards his friend, and for a fleeting second their eyes met, and Sirius could see the concern he felt growing inside of him mirrored in James' eyes. Then, finally, Peter said: 'No, it's okay.'

But it clearly wasn't okay.  

'I am going to find Macnair and then I am going to kill him,' Sirius said, struggling to keep his anger under control as he and James left Peter and Remus a little while later. 

Remus had insisted on staying with Peter, while James and Sirius both felt too restless to sit still. They needed to find Macnair and punish the poor excuse of a wizard.

'But what should we do?' James asked. 'We can't very well walk up to him and just hex him.'

'Why not?' 

'You know why.'

Sirius did know. He was a seventh year. Even two against one he knew that he and James stood no chance.

'He has a sister, doesn't he?'

James stopped abruptly. 'No. We're not going after someone's siblings.'

'It would be easier,' Sirius said. He couldn't get the image of Peter's small body in that dark corridor out of his head, nor how vulnerable he looked in that hospital bed. 

'And she would be innocent,' James protested. 'We're not our siblings, are we?'

There was something in James' hazel eyes and the way he said the words that told Sirius, quite plainly, that James knew about Regulus. Then again, Regulus had been on the platform with his Mother, so James was bound to have put two and two together. Still, Sirius was surprised James hadn't said anything.

'No,' Sirius conceded, 'we are not. But you've got to admit it's tempting. Macnair went after Peter, not us.'

James ran a hand through his hair absentmindedly: 'I know and I'd like to know why.'

'Because he's an easy target, that's why.'

'Yeah, probably,' James said, looking unconvinced.

'So what should we do?' Sirius asked his friend. 

'Something that sends a warning to others as well,' James said.

'For that to work, we're going to have to get caught,' Sirius pointed out.

'I know that, but who cares. We can't have people like Macnair going after Peter or Remus!'

'Oh, I don't care in the slightest,' Sirius assured James.  'Come on.'

'But we don't have a plan!' James protested.

'We'll find him and we'll follow him. I am sure something will come to us,' Sirius said. 'And if it doesn't, we can always go back to Gryffindor tower to lay some plans.'

/

'Walden, there you are.'

It was that prefect from earlier, Diggory. James and Sirius had followed Macnair, and now the two boys jumped into an empty classroom to avoid being seen by the Slytherins.

'Amos,' Walden Macnair said. 'If this is about earlier -'

'Of course it's about earlier!' Amos Diggory sounded impatient.

'I had nothin' to do with that boy being attacked.'

'His friends seem to think differently.'

'I didn't realise those boys could think,' Macnair sniggered. 

Sirius and James both grabbed each other, seeming to think the other would do something stupid. They both looked down at each others hands, and when their eyes met again, it was hard to keep from bursting out laughing. 

'Walden,' Diggory said in a warning voice, and Sirius felt his smile die as he remebered why they were in the empty classroom to begin with.

'I had nothin' to do with it, I say. Listen Amos, hypothetically - and I mean hypothetically - had I cursed that boy, you should be the first to thank me for it. But I didn't, so no thanks needed.'

'What do you mean?'

'Those brats - Potter, Black and Pettigrew - were the ones responsible for the stink pellets. Travers saw them.'

'Of course,' James whispered.

Sirius put his finger to his lips, but James ignored this and leaned in closer. 'Diggory is the keeper on the Slytherin team,' James all but breathed into Sirius' ear. 'And Travers is the Slytherin captain.'

'So instead of going to me, another prefect, the head boy or girl, or a teacher, you decided to take matters into your own hands?'

'I didn't do nothing. It's just hypotheticals.'

Sirius and James however, decided to be less hypotethical about their approach. 

'Potter! Black! What in - is that a student?'

Professor McGonagall was marching towards them. Annoyed, Sirius let go of Macnair's feet, and judging by the loud thud and splash, James had let go of his shoulders, and the body had fallen into the puddle that for some reason was to be found in the corridor.

This hadn't been part of the plan - if it could really be called a plan.

They had waited until Macnair was alone and in an empty corridor before they cast the spell. Nothing overly fancy, just the Full Body-Bind curse. They had then painstakingly cut off Macnairs robes (leaving his pants as 'nobody wants to see that'). The plan had been to bring him to the Great Hall and dump him in the middle of the room to make sure everyone saw what James and Sirius would do with bullies.

So the plan had been to get caught, but not this soon. 

Professor McGonagall's flaring nostrils however told Sirius quite plainly that any plans they had for Macnair would have to wait. 

Sirius wasn't quite sure he believed his head of house when she told them that never in her entire life had she been so ashamed of Gryffindor students, but he did believe her to be very angry with them. Therefore, it came as little surprise that she ignored his and James' quite reasonable explaination that Macnair had gone after Peter first and deserved what he got (or didn't get, as it turned out). Nor was Sirius surprised when their professor took thirty points from them each. 

'And I will send a letter to your parents, explaining what you have done,' professor McGonagall finished.

Sirius let out a long breath. While not ideal, he wasn't sure professor McGonagall realised how little Walburga Black would care about Sirius going after a Macnair, whom she considered to be inferior to many other pureblood families. Not that Sirius expected his Mother to be anything other than disappointed in him, but costing Gryffindor points and creating a headache for his head of house weren't exactly the items at the top of her long list of complaints about her eldest son. 

This was assuming Walburga would even read a letter from professor McGonagall. Sirius assumed she would, but on the other hand, he couldn't quite picture it. Maybe she would have Kreacher read it and summarise the essence. 

'Professor, no!' James protested, and Sirius nearly jumped. For a second he had forgotten James was there too. Sirius stared at his friend. Surely James had no reason to worry? 

Professor McGonagall looked likely to breath flames: 'No to what exactly, Potter?' 

'You can't write home. Or you can write to my parents, but Sirius -'

In a rush of panic, Sirius realised where James was going with this, and he immediately shouted: 'SHUT UP, YOU IDIOT!'

James did shut up, thankfully. Sirius had to endure another lecture from his head of house about 'language' and 'manners', after professor McGonagall had asked him what James meant, and Sirius had said he hadn't got the faintest clue - which they all knew to be a lie.

As soon as they had put enough distance between professor McGonagall's office and themselves, Sirius punched James' face as hard as he could. Sirius was furious with James and his betrayal. How dared he relate anything - anything at all - about Sirius' family to someone like professor McGonagall. Or anyone. 

Not that Sirius had said much to James, but what he had said - or allowed James to deduce - was private. 

James staggered backwards, blood flowing from his nose. Good, Sirius thought, I hope his nose is broken.

With that Sirius marched off to the Gryffindor Tower.

/

'Hi, can I come in?' James asked, as he pulled open the curtains of Sirius' four-poster bed an hour or so later.

Sirius shrugged, and James took that as all the invitation he needed.

'How is your nose?' Sirius asked.

James' nose looked slightly pink, but otherwise it looked okay.

'A bit sore,' James said, 'but all good.'

'I meant to break it,' Sirius admitted.

'Mate, you punch like a girl.'

'Do not!'

'Do!'

'I can punch you again and prove it to you.'

'I think one more punch would break it,' James conceded, 'so please don't.'

Sirius grunted in reply. He didn't want to break James' nose anymore, anyways.

'I am sorry, Sirius,' James said, looking at Sirius with such sincerity it almost hurt.

'I know that,' Sirius said.

'Can you forgive me?'

'Course.'

But I can't forget it, Sirius thought. James wasn't to be trusted with information that made Sirius vulnerable.

'I've broken your trust, haven't I?' James asked, and Sirius realised that his friend had been studying him.

'Yes.'

James sighed: 'Did you ever really trust me?'

More than anyone, Sirius wanted to say. 'A bit,' he said instead.

'But not anymore?'

Sirius didn't know what to say. He didn't understand why trust was such an important thing for James. Sirius knew James to be good. James was the most loyal person Sirius had ever met. Why was trust the currency James seemed to be looking for, when it was the one Sirius didn't want to deal in?

'Do you think you'll ever trust me?' James asked when Sirius didn't answer.

'No, not fully,' Sirius answered truthfully.

Sirius regretted the words almost instantaneously. Usually, Sirius had never bothered much about sparing people's feelings. For James and Remus' sake, he was trying to be nicer to Peter, but in general, Sirius felt people needed to grow thicker skins. But as he said the words, he saw how some of that light that always existed in James' eyes flickered and died, and Sirius knew, with gut-wrenching certainty, that something between them shattered in that moment.

Sirius half-expected, possibly even wanted, James to say something like: 'that's what you think,' or 'don't worry, Sirius, I'll make you trust me.' But James didn't. He continued to look at Sirius for a long time, and then he said: 'I think I'll go and check on Pete. Do you want to come?'

It had been inevitable, Sirius reflected, this change between them. Nothing to mourn - it would always have happened. Better now before Sirius started caring too much than later.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Sirius had known from the moment he had told James that he wouldn't ever fully trust his friend that he had hurt James, but the full extent of it only became apparent the following morning when Sirius could tell James hadn't been sleeping well - if at all.

James doesn't know how to handle things he finds challenging, Sirius told himself. There was no point worrying too much, James would never have handled the truth well. And yet, Sirius felt like someone was suffocating him each time he looked at James, his chest tightening uncomfortably when he caught James looking unsure or downcast. 

There weren't any great changes to their friendship, not at a surface level. James and Sirius continued to sit together in class, and James would even occasionally still challenge Sirius to a chess game or two in the evening, but things were different. James had started to make more of an effort to drag Remus and Peter into the conversations he and Sirius were having, James suddenly spent more time in the library revising for the upcoming exams, and when they played chess, James was more subdued than previously - which incidentally led to more victories than usual on James' part.

James had this ridiculous idea that true friendships meant complete trust, Sirius knew that. And as such, it didn't surprise Sirius that James felt rejected and upset at the notion that Sirius couldn't trust him fully. Sirius also knew that he was in the right, and James was wrong. It was possible to love someone and not trust them. Not that Sirius loved James, but the point remained: you could be best friends and not trust each other fully. 

Sirius trusted James' intentions, and that, Sirius felt, was what mattered. He trusted that James would always try to have his back. He had known that James would shut up the moment he told him to, because James was everything Sirius wanted in a friend: he was brave, smart and, above all, loyal. Trust had very little to do with anything that mattered.

Yet, as the school days blurred into one another and James didn't seem to come around to this view, Sirius decided to check what his other friends thought about the issue of trust. He had to be careful about not giving too much away, but all he wanted to discuss was whether trust was really that important in friendships. 

Peter was of no help, which shouldn't have surprised Sirius. Peter seemed to hold a similar, and equally naïve, view to that of James: 'I dunno Sirius, isn't trust one of the most important things in a friendship?'

At the time, Sirius had almost been willing to concede that maybe he had got the wrong end of the broomstick, but talking to Remus helped confirm Sirius' belief that he wasn't in the wrong.

'How important do you think trust is in friendships?' Sirius had asked Remus in the library that Thursday. James was thankfully at a Quidditch practice.

Remus frowned, looking up from A Beginner's Guide in Transfiguration.

'Why do you ask?' Remus asked sharply, seemingly reluctant to stop his revision.

'James and I were having a discussion the other day, about ... how friendships might be different in the different houses,' Sirius invented wildly, 'y'know, there aren't any real friends in Slytherin as it's all transactional. And I suppose we value bravery, so we want friends who stand up for us,' (and James certainly did that, Sirius thought, with a surge of pride), 'and Hufflepuffs value loyalty and trustworthiness - and that got us discussing what's more important in a friendship: loyalty or trust.'

While Sirius was aware his ramblings made him sound a little bit like James, he felt that he had done an excellent job of coming up with a plausible story that got to the heart of the matter. 

Remus seemed to relax a little as he closed his Transfiguration book.

'They both sound like important qualities,' Remus said, 'I don't think only Hufflepuffs would want elements of trust and loyalty in their friendships.'

'Elements of both are important,' Sirius agreed quickly, and then had to pause as Madam Pince walked past them. 

Luckily it seemed like she had spotted someone having a breakdown by the sounds of their sobs, so Madam Pince didn't linger. Sirius was convinced that woman had one objective and that was to keep the library quiet, so he suspected the student was probably about to get thrown out.

'But you can still be close friends and not trust someone one hundred percent,' Sirius continued once it was safe. 'If you trust their intentions, and you know they are loyal, but you also know that there are some things you can't share with them, they can still be your friends. Right?'

Remus' face seemed to close off for a second, and Sirius realised he had said too much. Now all that remained was for Remus to tell Sirius that he got it all wrong, and that trust was this all-important thing, just like James thought it was.

'I think,' Remus said, eventually, his voice very quiet, 'trust works both ways. Sometimes people need to trust that someone might keep things from their friends because it's better that way... And love -' here Remus' voice became a bit firmer, 'love is the most important thing, right? Surely that's the key to friendships?' 

'Exactly,' Sirius agreed, though he found love to be a very strong word.

/

Sirius decided that the best way to show James that he valued their friendship just as much as James did, was to spend the weekend helping James prepare for the upcoming match in two weeks time. However, Sirius would never get the chance. That Friday at lunch time, professor McGonagall came to find James at the Gryffindor table.

'Come with me, Potter,' their professor said, looking unusually grave.

James got up, looking confused, and Sirius automatically followed suit.

'No need for you to join us, Black.'

'I am coming too!' Sirius said. 'He's not done anything wrong!'

'I know that,' professor McGonagall said.

This only served to make James pale even more, and Sirius gave their Transfiguration professor a defiant look. She could try to stop him following James if she wanted to, but she would not succeed. It seemed professor McGonagall came to the same conclusion.

'Your mother is here,' professor McGonagall said as they approached her office, her voice gentler than Sirius had ever heard it. 

James stopped dead. 

For a bewildering second Sirius wondered if this had anything to do with the letter professor McGonagall had sent to their parents, but then he realised that McGonagall had said James wasn't in any trouble. James' mother was here, and James wasn't in any trouble. That couldn't be good news.

'Come on,' Sirius murmured, putting an arm around his friend and nudging him forward.

When they entered McGonagall's office, Mrs Potter stood up and turned around to face them. Her eyes were swollen and her nose pink. 

'James, my darling,' she said, her voice thicker than Sirius remembered it.

James looked at her, his eyes wide with fear. Sirius could feel James shake as Sirius kept his arm around his friend.

'Where's dad?' James said, his voice small.

'He's at home at the moment,' Mrs Potter said, and Sirius could feel James relax, if only a little.

'What's wrong?' James asked, stepping closer to his mother and forcing Sirius to let go of him. 

Mrs Potter's lip trembled. Sirius wanted to look away, knowing he was watching something very private, and yet he could not tear his eyes away from the scene in front of him, nervously wondering what Mrs Potter would tell James.

'James, I am so so sorry,' Mrs Potter said as she knelt down before her son. 'Your grandpa Henry, he... he passed away earlier this morning.'

'No,' James said, and to Sirius' surprise, James turned to him, his eyes begging Sirius to tell him something. 

'It's not true,' James said, his voice sounding desperate. 

Sirius felt sick watching James' stricken face. There was nothing Sirius could do to help James. Not now.

'Sirius,' James pleaded. 

But what could Sirius say?

'James,' Mrs Potter said quietly, 'my love -'

'No, you're lying!' James faced his mother again. Sirius didn't need to see James' face to hear how James was slowly losing way to his emotions, his voice sounding choked. 

'He's not - he can't be - he's -'

James became entirely incoherent as he lost whatever composure he had tried to maintain. Mrs Potter embraced her son, and James seemed to sink helplessly into her arms, large sobs escaping him.

Sirius had always felt uncomfortable watching people cry. Mostly he associated it with weak people. Regulus cried a lot and Peter could also more easily be found in tears than Remus or James. Yet, when Sirius looked away from his friend in professor McGonagall's office, it was not from embarrassment or disapproval. Seeing James like this hurt more than anything Sirius had experienced so far.

'You better be off now or you will be late for History of Magic,' professor McGonagall said after the Potters had left, a Hogwarts house-elf having helped pick up the few items James needed for his time away. 

History of Magic had never felt less important. Sirius didn't even know when he would see James again.

'Professor,' Sirius asked, 'what is it like to lose someone you really care about?'

Thinking of Remus and James, and what they were going through with their grandparents, Sirius felt like he needed to make more of an effort to help them. 

'I think there are books written on the subject that will do a better job of explaining that than I can, Black,' professor McGonagall said after a short pause where she had been studying him. 'But I've heard it described as if someone has pulled the rug under your feet. You feel out of balance, alone - some times - and scared that your life will never quite make sense again. Some people experience anger, confusion, jealousy, hopelessness - denial even.'

'Sounds terrible,' Sirius thought aloud.

'It is,' professor McGonagall agreed quietly. Then she cleared her throat, 'Off to class, Black. Or I will have to take points from Gryffindor, and I'd rather not.'

/

Sirius took professor McGonagall's advice and started joining Peter and Remus in the library, so that he could read about grief. He learned that there were many stages of grief, that there were potions one could take, and that talking could also help, but that in the end, time was usually the most effective remedy. Even so, losing someone seemed to be something that could follow a person for the rest of their lives.

There were stories of necromancy, of wizards and witches searching for the resurrection stone from the Tales of the Three Brothers, of people wasting away trying to bring people back from the dead. It all made Sirius wonder whether this was an area were muggles were more blessed, having no option but to accept death. 

One thing all the books Sirius skimmed through seemed to agree was that grief could not be rushed. This was terribly inconvenient. Nevertheless, Sirius made a mental note not to ask James to get over the death of his grandfather, even if it would mean having James be subdued for the rest of the school year. 

The rest of the school year. There wasn't much time left. Sirius decided not to think more about that. Things were bad enough without James, Sirius didn't need to add another thing to make him more miserable still. 

Sunday evening Sirius lay awake thinking about how some people ended up dividing their lives into a 'before' and 'after' the passing of someone they loved. He wondered if this would be the case for James with his grandfather. Surely not. After all, it was only a grandparent. They were meant to die. Remus seemed to be doing alright, though he had looked very upset when Sirius had told him that James' grandfather had passed away too.

Maybe Peter divided his life into a 'before' and 'after' the loss of his father? That was more likely, Sirius thought.

Sirius could understand this 'before' and 'after' concept well, because this was not only limited to grief. There had been a 'before' Sirius had met James Potter and gone to Hogwarts, and an 'after'. It was the most natural divide in Sirius' life, the line that separated his cold and friendless childhood, and his new life where he finally felt at home and free and... safe. Therefore, Sirius could see how there could be a 'before' you lost someone you cared about and 'after' you lost someone. He could see it, but he decided he didn't want to consider it too closely. The only people Sirius cared about were around his age, so he saw no reason to entertain the idea that he would lose any of them, anytime soon.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'So this is where you two are hiding.' 

James had heard someone open the door, but he hadn't bothered opening his eyes. He was relieved to recognise Sarah's voice. Thank Merlin it hadn't been any of the other guests.

'Oh,' Sarah was suddenly whispering, 'sorry, I didn't realise... is he asleep?'

'I think so,' Carl responded equally quietly, but he didn't stop running his fingers through James' hair, and James didn't bother putting his two cousins right. He was nearly asleep.

'How is he?' Sarah asked, and James could feel the mattress on the bed sink a bit further as Sarah must have seated herself next to Carl.

'He's alright now. The funeral wore him out, naturally, but he's doing as well as you could expect, I suppose.'

James tried to block out his cousins words. He wasn't overly keen on hearing them discuss him. Especially when they talked about him as if he was this frail thing that could break any moment.

'And you?' Sarah asked.

'I can't complain, can I? He was old, it was his time.'

Easy for him to say! Unlike James, Carl was also old. James didn't care that Henry Potter had been old. James wasn't! 

James had never known his grandmother and grandfather on his mother's side, though he knew Sarah remembered them both well, and he had never got to know his paternal grandmother either. The only grandparent he had had was Henry, and James had always felt that had been sufficient, because his grandad had been great. He had been funny and kind and brave and smart, just like James' dad.

'You remember what you told me at Christmas?' Sarah asked quietly, but she didn't wait for a response: 'you're allowed to hurt. You're allowed to miss him.'

'He wasn't my grandfather.'

'He was as good as, though, wasn't he?'

'Yeah well, maybe a bit.'

'I am sorry Carl, I really am. And -' here Sarah hesitated a bit, 'I am sorry about Thaddeus.'

'He didn't leave me much choice, did he, wanting to be introduced to mum and dad like that.'

'It was really unfair of him to push so early, but would you ever - are you ever going to tell them?'

Carl sighed, and stopped running his fingers through James' hair.

'Honestly, Sarah, I have no idea. I love mum, I do. I suppose it'd be easier if I didn't. As much as I love her though, I know she has been brought up in a family that cuts people out left, right and centre.'

James realised he had a newfound interest in his aunt Dorea's family, and for the first time since Sarah came into the room, James was happy he hadn't fallen asleep, just yet.

'But she doesn't agree with that. You've seen how she treated Andromeda.'

'She doesn't necessarily agree with all of the Black family values,' Carl conceded, 'but their way of handling things are second nature to her.'

'She wouldn't cut you out,' Sarah said, loud enough that James felt Carl's hand hover uncertainly over his ears. 

'I wouldn't bet on it,' Carl whispered darkly. 'No, if I am going to tell them, it will have to be for someone I am prepared to lose my family over.'

'Not me,' Sarah whispered fiercely, 'I'll always be there. I promise.'

'I have Fleamont and Euphemia's reassurances too,' Carl muttered, and James was confused to hear traces of bitterness in Carl's voice. That couldn't be right?

'I think you're wrong about your mum and dad. They love you just as unconditionally as the rest of us do.'

Carl didn't reply.

'This is the wrong time to talk about it, and it isn't really my business at all. I am sorry. I didn't think. I just... I love you so much and I hate seeing you being hurt.'

'I know,' Carl murmured. 'I know you mean well.'

They sat in silence for a bit, and James felt himself slowly drifting off when Sarah asked: 'May I ask - you're... you like both, right? The girls you bring home, they are real relationships.'

'Yes,' Carl said shortly. Then: 'Merlin knows the only fake relationship I've ever had was with you.'

This was news to James. Both that Carl liked girls and boys and that Sarah and Carl had dated - even if it had all been pretence.

Sarah laughed quietly: 'that worked wonders though, didn't it? Oh, who was it you wanted to make jealous again, I can't remember?' 

'Jason Flint.'

'Oh gosh, really?' 

'He was handsome!'  

'And you dated him for exactly how long?'

'You make it sound like I used to date and dump people all the time. I dated him for a full term. At fifteen I'd say that's rather long. Especially as I realised that beyond his looks, he really had nothing to offer.'

'I shouldn't judge. Aside from Lucian I've never dated anyone.'

'Eh, what did we just agree on, you and I dated. So you've dated two people. And Lucian went on forever.'

'He really was the one, wasn't he?'

'If he had been the one, he'd still be here. Lucian was a prick.'

'I wasn't easy, with Alex - and everything.'

'You were perfectly within your rights not to be easy. Bloody hell Sarah, if I was him, I'd be more worried if you had taken that in your stride. And how long were you together for? Seven years, right?'

'Just about,' Sarah agreed. 'But-'

'No buts. He shouldn't have left you, but good riddance, as it happened.'

'You're biased.'

'Of course I am bloody biased. I love you... Nobody gets to hurt my family.'

'Did I ever thank you enough for that time?' Sarah asked.

'Plenty, as it happened. But even if you hadn't, it wouldn't have changed a thing. Someone had to keep you alive, and when your pathetic excuse of a boyfriend couldn't be bothered...'

'I know you say that as a figure of speech, but I sometimes think you really were the only thing keeping me alive. You and James and mum.'

'I'm not sure I did mean it as a figure of speech,' Carl's voice sounded serious.

'I'm sorry. It can't have been easy on you. And it's not like you didn't lose Alex too.'

'Stop apologising. I would do it all again. Even living in that sad little place you still call your home. I will do it all again, should you need me to.'

'I would never ask you to live with me again,' Sarah laughed. 'The look of relief on your face when you knew you could move out is something I'll never forget.'

'There's only so much of you I can take.' James was sure Carl was teasing and he heard Sarah scoff. 'But I'd move back in a heart-beat if you asked.'

'I know that.'

Another long silence filled the room.

'What about James? Do you think he'll start dating someone soon?' 

James tried to not scrunch his nose at Sarah's question. Dating people sounded boring and disgusting.

'James is just a baby. No way any girl gets to come and break his heart.'

Why did everyone keep calling him a baby?! He was twelve!

'You of everyone shouldn't go around making assumptions about whether it will be a girl or a boy that will break James' heart.'

'Quite right, especially as nobody will be allowed to do that as long as I am around.'

'I miss James,' Sarah said quietly. 'I am stupidly fond of him and I miss him all the time he's at school.'

Now James felt distinctly uncomfortable, and had it not been for the fact that he would have had to admit to overhearing their entire conversation, he would have opened his eyes right then and there to avoid them continuing this conversation.

'As it happens, I am stupidly fond of this idiot too,' Carl said, and resumed running his fingers through James' hair. 'But soon it will be summer.'

'A fat lot of good that will do me, peak Quidditch season and all. It was hard enough getting the time off for this funeral.'

'I've thought about that,' Carl admitted, 'I talked to Fleamont and Euphemia about it and I've got season tickets for me and James. You'll be sick of us by the end of the season.'

'Carl, I could have got you those tickets.'

'I know that, but I want to support my favourite team the way every normal person does it. It's not like I lack the funds. So what do you say? Not that you have a choice, mind you - the tickets are already bought.'

Sarah was quiet for a bit, and when she spoke, James thought she sounded slightly strangled: 'I'd love that very much.'

/  

James found it strange how he missed his grandad intensely in some moments, and in others he almost forgot Henry Potter was dead and life continued on like normal. 

James had been sat cross-legged on his bed, flicking through Which Broomstick? thinking of the new broom his parents had told him he could get during the summer. It was a waste of time, really, as he would always just rely on Sarah's recommendation, but he liked reading about the different broom makes so that he could have a well-informed opinion when he would eventually discuss this with his cousin.

There was a knock on the door, and to James' surprise, it was his father who entered.

'Hi Jim. Do you have a moment?'

'Sure, dad, what's up?' James asked, putting the magazine down.

Any other time, and James might have needed a bit more persuasion to put down his magazine, but despite the fact that he had been home for five days now, he'd barely been able to get any time with his father. 

The last few days had also served as a reminder to James about how old Fleamont Potter really was. His already grey hair seemed to have paled to an almost snowy white, and whereas James was sure it had still been thick and wild when he left for Hogwarts last, it now seemed thin and tamer. Sirius liked to joke about how old James' parents were, but the reality seemed to press upon James more so in light of his grandad's passing. Not only had Henry Potter been really old, James' parents were also not young. 

How often hadn't Sarah and Carl been mistaken for James' parents and Fleamont and Euphemia his grandparents? It had usually been a source of amusement for him, Carl, and Sarah, and even though he knew his mother could get upset at the mix-up, James hadn't paid it much attention.

Fleamont sat down at the edge of James' bed, and James moved closer to his father.

'I trust you're all packed for Hogwarts?'

'Course I am,' James said. 

'Good, good. Am I to understand that you're abandoning us this evening?'

'At seven.'

James knew this couldn't really be why his dad was speaking to him. All this his dad would be able to learn just as quickly from Euphemia.

'So we will be honoured with your presence at dinner?'

'Yes, dad,' James said, restraining himself from rolling his eyes. But this was his dad. It took time for Fleamont to work himself up to whatever he wanted to say.

'After dinner, what do you say to joining me in my study for a bit?'

'Alright,' James said, wondering if this really could be all his dad wanted to say.

Realising that it was, as Fleamont nodded and stood up again, James stood up too and threw his arms around his dad: 'I am sorry about grandad.'

James felt Fleamonts arms wrap around him. 'You're a good boy, Jim.'

And James had to agree with that.

/

James looked around his father's study. It wasn't really a room he was allowed into much. Half of the room reminded him of a miniature Hogwarts library, with shelves filled with all sorts of leatherbound books, a desk with a few photographs of James and his parents and a whole heap of scrolls of parchment, open books, quills and ink bottles (come to think of it, Madam Pince would probably get a fit, especially as a couple of ink bottles were so precariously placed on top of a stack of books, that they looked liable to tilt over and shatter at any moment). The other half of the room was more like Slughorn's classroom - or likely his office, though James didn't know. There were a few cauldrons of various sizes and materials, shelves with potions ingredients, a sink and a work bench. His dad might have retired years ago, but you could never take the potioneer out of the Potter, as his mother used to remark.    

On the table lay a box which James hadn't seen before. He turned and looked at his father who had followed him into the study.

'Go on, son, take a look,' his dad said, his eyes shining brightly the way they often did when he showed off some new potion.

James went over and saw that the box contained a shining, silvery cloth. Unable to help himself, James reached out a hand and touched the material. It was strange to the touch, like water woven into material. He knew at once what it was. 

'This is the cloak,' James said, turning to face his father. 'The invisibility cloak.'

It was a family heirloom. The family heirloom. 

James had heard about it from his father and his grandad. It was one of the best invisibility cloaks in existence. Most cloaks were simply imbued with a Disillusionment Charm or carrying a Bedazzling Hex - or they were woven from Demiguise hair, but this was a first rate cloak, which Henry had received from his father. 

'I think the time has come for you make use of it. Quite frankly, I have no idea why I didn't give it to you sooner, it has merely been gathering dust here at home - but I suppose I felt that the time was never right.'

'And now the time feels right?' James asked.

'Time is limited - and this week has served as a reminder of that,' Fleamont said. Before James got the chance to argue, his father cleared his throat and said: 'Well, what are you waiting for? Try it on!'

James didn't need to be told twice.

'Excellent,' his father said as James wrapped the cloak around him, so that only his head was visible.

'Now I probably needn't tell you that you need to cover your whole body for the cloak to serve it's purpose -'

Merlin and Morgana! James rolled his eyes: 'I think I got that part, thanks.'

'But I might need to remind you that you need to be quiet under the cloak to avoid detection.'

James raised his eyebrows.

'Excellent! Just like that. Not a sound. Well, you are more than welcome to practice staying quiet and invisible under the cloak during the summer holiday, should you need it.'

'Haha,' James said dryly.

'Well, it's nearly seven,' his dad said. 'Why don't you go upstairs and pack that, and then I'll see you downstairs before you leave.'

'And James,' his dad said just as James reached the door, 'I won't tell you how to use the cloak, but remember that like with any kind of magic, there are ways to use it - and misuse it. Use it well.'

''Course dad!' James promised. He already had one or two ideas for how to use this cloak when he got back to Hogwarts.  

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'I'll never remember this,' Peter groaned, looking up from One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi, his face a picture of desperation.

'I agree,' Sirius said, closing his own copy. 

Remus looked up in time to see Peter look astonished, and a little hopeful. Remus, however, had a strong suspicion he knew where this was going. He was right. 

Sirius leaned back in his chair and said lazily: 'You'll never remember this. So, why don't we stop wasting our time. We could do something fun instead.'

'There's no reason why you won't remember this by the time the exams come around Peter. That's why we're revising,' Remus said, trying to smile encouragingly at Peter.

'Oh give it a rest, will you,' Sirius complained. 'The weather is amazing. We could go down to the lake - or we could go flying?'

To say that Sirius Black missed James Potter was an understatement. Remus worried, not for the first time, about how miserable Sirius would be during the summer holiday, cut off from James for two months. 

James had mentioned a few times in passing that he wanted Peter and Remus to come and visit, but he had never attempted to extend the invite to Sirius. Though Remus was sure they all knew that nobody would be more welcome than Sirius. 

While both boys would undoubtedly miss each other, James' summer would be a good one even without his best friend. It was evident from everything Remus had seen and heard that James' family adored him, and that James cared greatly for his family in return. Sirius though... 

'You're absolutely sure you can't get away to visit any of us this summer?' Remus asked. 

When Sirius blinked in confusion, Remus realised that he had been carried away by his own thoughts. Peter and Sirius had been brainstorming activities they could do outside - or outside the library at any rate. 

'Positive,' Sirius said firmly, his expression hardening. Remus knew the summer holiday wasn't exactly Sirius' favourite topic.

Deciding to throw caution to the wind, Remus addressed the issue head on: 'Two months is a long time... Have you given any thought to how you are going to manage without...' Remus felt a bit stupid as Sirius' grey eyes met his, his eyebrows raised, and his expression unamused: 'well... James,' Remus finished lamely.

'No thoughts needed. I will be perfectly fine, not that it's any of your concern,' Sirius answered coolly.

Remus felt his cheeks burn, but he'd come so far: 'Except you won't. You're not fine now, and it's been what? Four days?'

Remus needed Sirius to think ahead. Once Sirius was at home, Remus would have no chance of helping Sirius, and the idea of Sirius being miserable and friendless for two months was not pleasant.

'You can't be -' Sirius started.

'Serious?' 

Remus paused for a second, but thankfully Sirius wasn't in the mood for silly jokes: 'I am.'

'This is ridiculous,' Sirius muttered, studying Remus, his expression one of deepest dissatisfaction. 'I am disappointed, you know. I thought you had more brains than this. I am perfectly fine now, and I'll be perfectly fine over the summer.'

Sirius stood up: 'I don't know why I am bothering hanging around here when the exams are going to be a joke.' 

With that Sirius Black left them.

Remus had to fight an urge to run after Sirius and apologise. He felt shaken - the words 'I am disappointed' seeming to hang over him, though Remus was sure he'd done the right thing trying to help Sirius. 

Peter hadn't followed Sirius, but Remus got the impression he had wanted to. The small boy didn't look at Remus, instead he looked down at the stack of books in front of them.  

Remus picked up his own copy of One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi and with an effort he smiled and said as calmly as he could: 'why don't I test you in what you've just revised? You might be surprised to find you remember quite a bit.'

Remus had no experience with crossing Sirius, and was therefore unsure what to expect from Sirius when they next saw each other. But never in a million years would he have guessed that Sirius would approach him the very same evening, just as Remus was ready to go to sleep.

'Can we talk?' Sirius asked quietly, looking towards the door. 

It was evident he was anxious to take advantage of Peter's absence. 

'Yes, of course,' Remus said, trying to hide his surprise. 

Remus sat up quickly, and moved a little to the side to make space. Sirius sat down at the edge of the bed.

'I think I messed up... with James.' 

Sirius was addressing his hands. Remus hardly dared to breathe. He knew enough about Sirius to know this wasn't something he found easy to talk about, and Remus was sure one wrong move would result in Sirius shutting down any further attempts to talk about what bothered him.

'James wants me to trust him,' Sirius continued.

So that had been why Sirius had wanted to talk about trust and loyalty in friendships? Remus felt relieved it had had nothing to do with him - but he was also surprised.

'You don't trust James?' Remus blurted out. 'But you two seem so close!'

Sirius flinched, and Remus realised his mistake. The boy sitting on the edge of his bed wanted to believe that closeness had nothing to do with trust - hadn't that been the essence of their conversation back then?

'Never mind,' Sirius muttered. 

For a second Remus was convinced that Sirius would leave abruptly. However, Sirius didn't move. He seemed to be fighting an internal battle.

Finally, he said: 'He said something the other day. Something he shouldn't have. Maybe I did trust him, but I am not so sure anymore.'

'Well, if that is the case, maybe it is James that messed things up, not you.'

'He apologised,' Sirius said quickly.

'But you feel that's not enough?' Remus asked.

'I,' Sirius ran his hand through his hair, 'shit,' he shrugged helplessly.

Remus waited for Sirius to continue, but he didn't.

'Well, things like that take time to repair,' Remus said finally, as if he had any idea about any of this.  'Maybe ask him for time?'

'Time for what?'

'To figure things out? Maybe find out what would help rebuild that trust?' 

Without much context, Remus found it hard to be helpful. He felt like he was clutching at straws.

'It wasn't a big thing,' Sirius muttered, he sounded almost defensive. 'And he was sorry.'

'It sounds to me like you want to trust him,' Remus observed. 'Maybe that's good enough for now?'

Sirius shook his head. 

'Okay... Well Sirius, I'm all out of ideas.' 

Remus really didn't know what had happened between the two friends nor what Sirius wanted from him. 

'Don't worry,' Sirius said, and to Remus' surprise, Sirius was smiling. 'I got it now.'

'Really?'

'Yes,' Sirius said firmly. 'Thanks Remus.'

Remus wasn't sure he had done anything, and he had no idea what Sirius had got, but he he knew asking would be pointless.

Sirius stood up: 'You're not entirely wrong about this summer - it won't be fun without any of you, but I'll find a way. I always do.' 

And that, Remus suspected, was the closest he'd ever get to an apology from Sirius Black.

Sirius must have been in a good mood following their conversation, because Remus heard Sirius and Peter play Exploding Snap into the night. They were laughing quietly together and Remus fell asleep letting their whispered voices wash over him like the rustling leaves on the trees in their small garden back home. 

The following day brought good news. Duchess, James' family owl, landed in front of them at breakfast with a letter addressed to them all. James would be returning to Hogwarts that evening around seven. 

'And here I'd finally gotten used to the peace and quiet,' Sirius said lazily, but he fooled no one. 

Remus realised Sirius wasn't the only one to miss James. That day, Remus felt restless sitting through their classes, and when Sirius suggested they go up and meet James outside of professor McGonagall's office after dinner, Remus agreed as enthusiastically as Peter. 

'Of course we should have done this when you came back from your grandmother too,' Sirius said to Remus. 

'Yeah, but you didn't tell us when you'd be back,' Peter shot in.

Remus hated how he had pretended he'd lost a grandmother. Even before everything had happened with James, Remus had felt this lie to be wrong. When he learned that James had lost his grandfather shortly after, Remus felt absolutely terrible. 

'I wanted to be alone,' Remus muttered, not entirely untruthfully. He did wish they could leave him alone around the full moon.

'Do you think James would want to be left alone?' Peter asked, anxiously. 

Sirius laughed: 'Not in a million years.' Then he frowned, seeming to second-guess himself: 'or I don't think so.'

'No,' Remus agreed. 'I don't think so either.'

They had arrived outside professor McGonagall's office door and they were just about to knock when James came out. 

James' eyes widened as he took in his friends, then he grinned: 'Missed me much?'

'Not a chance,' Sirius grinned back, his grey eyes shining brightly. 'We were just passing by.'

'Where were you headed?' James asked, looking amused.

He looked okay, Remus decided. Maybe a bit tired, a bit reduced, but overall, James looked exactly like he had done before he had left them to follow professor McGonagall.

'Outside, of course,' Sirius shrugged, as if professor McGonagall's office happened to be somewhere on the way from the Great Hall to the grounds outside. 'We were talking about flying, weren't we boys? The weather isn't too bad.'

They had not been talking about flying, but Remus couldn't help but smile and nod.

James' smile widened. 

'With you back, I suppose we could play two-aside Quidditch.'

Could we indeed? 

Remus had no doubt he'd be rubbish. Seeing James' excitement at the prospect of playing with his friends, however, Remus couldn't very well refuse.

They found some school brooms in the broomshed and made their way over to the Quidditch pitch, intending to use only a small part of the pitch. With Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff having played their last match of the season, and neither Slytherin nor Gryffindor having practice that evening, they had expected to find the pitch deserted, but they found three players a little older than themselves passing a Quaffle between them. The oldest one, and only girl, Remus suspected might be on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team.

Rather than ignoring the newcomers, the three landed next to them. 

'Davies, hi!' James said, smiling at the girl.

'Helena, please,' Helena Davies said, waving a hand. 'You've come to play? You want to join us? With seven players we could actually have some proper fun.'

'Sure,' Sirius agreed, and James nodded fervently.

Remus felt his heart sink. He wasn't any good at Quidditch, and while he suspected he would enjoy playing with his friends, he wasn't overly keen to play with strangers.

'Wouldn't it be better with six - three aside? I don't mind -' Remus tried.

'Don't be silly,' Davies waved her hand. 'Whatever we do, we won't have even teams, so we can just swap around.'

'You're Shacklebolt, aren't you?' James asked a boy with thick dark hair who stood behind Davies. The boy nodded. 

'Thanks again, mate,' James said, flashing him a grin, and the boy grinned back. 

'Strictly speaking, I think I am the one who should be thanking you,' Sirius said. 

'What's all this?' Davies looked between them all.

'Oh nothing, Helena,' Shacklebolt said calmly, and turning to Sirius again, he said: 'It's really was nothing.'

Remus had no idea what they were talking about either, but unlike Davies he didn't mind all that much.

'You know Liam Jordan, I would assume,' Shacklebolt said.

'I'd assume not,' Liam Jordan said quickly. 'I don't know how it works in Ravenclaw Kingsley, but I don't know every Gryffindor.'

'A fair point,' Shacklebolt agreed, 'especially as you spend most your time outside the common room.'

'Liam is practically an honorary Ravenclaw,' Davies explained to the rest.

'I know your brother, Jay,' James offered.

'And I know of you, of course,' Jordan said. 'First year Gryffindor Quidditch player - oh, and it was you and Black who started that Whomping Willow game, wasn't it?'

James' grin was so wide Remus found himself wondering if it hurt, smiling that widely.

'Yes well, everyone knows about Potter and Black,' Davies said quickly, 'but James introduce us to your other friends so we can get going.'

Shortly after they were all in the air. Remus did his best to not make a complete fool out of himself, but it wasn't easy. Remus learned in snippets of dialogue inbetween gameplay that Liam Jordan often played with his older brother, and Shacklebolt was a reserve on the Ravenclaw team, expecting to join the team full time next year. Then there was James, of course, who was the best of them all at playing the chaser position, and Sirius, who when playing in a team with James became nearly just as dangerous, being able to anticipate James' every move. All the time the two boys had practiced together was starting to show. Peter and Remus made up the two poorest players, and Remus worst of all. 

'Only way to get better is to practice,' Sirius shrugged when they were all safely on the ground again, and Remus was apologising profusely for dropping the Quaffle at the most inopportune times, for what felt like the hundred time.

'You're not bad,' James said, with some sincerity. 'Considering how little you've played.'

'I wouldn't try to measure myself against James Potter,' Shacklebolt said quietly to Remus, 'that benchmark would only serve to make us all miserable.'

And Remus had to agree with that.

'Well then, good luck in your game next weekend,' Davies said to James as they all made their way to the castle. 'Just don't overtake us in the tournament.'

'I think,' Shacklebolt said seriously, 'that it's unlikely Ravenclaw keeps hold of the lead, when either team only needs 200 points to surpass us.'

'Right now that feels like a tall order,' Jordan said. 'That's still five goals needing to be scored, on top of us catching the Snitch.'

'Traitor,' Sirius muttered so quietly only Remus could hear him, then louder, Sirius said: 'Five goals between James, Ryan and McLaggen will be an easy feat.'

'Don't forget,' Shacklebolt said, turning to Jordan, 'Slytherin has a good line up of chasers too. Personally, I'd rather Gryffindor won if it came down to it.'

'Oh Merlin, don't even,' Davies said. 'We can't have Travers win!'

'No,' James said, and suddenly all humour was gone from his face. He looked extremely serious as he continued. 'I agree, we can't have that.’

Just as they were half-way up the castle, they spotted a red-haired figure making his way down towards them.

'Fabian, hi,' James said, stopping to greet his captain. The Ravenclaws pressed on, but Remus, Sirius and Peter decided to stay behind.

'Potter, good to see you!' Prewett said, smiling, then his smile faltered somewhat. 'I was sorry to hear about your grandfather. How are you holding up?'

'Fine,' James said, looking awkward.

'Henry Potter was a great man,' Prewett said. 

'He was,' James muttered, looking down.

'It will get better,' Prewett said kindly.

James nodded. Then, after a short pause he asked: 'Is there still a practice tomorrow? I've not seen anyone from the team since I got back.'

'Same time as usual, if you're up for it.'

'Course I am!' James said, quickly, seemingly mortified at the idea that his captain would think otherwise. 'I am - I am still on the team, right? I know I missed some practices just before the game, and -'

Prewett held up a hand to stop James. 'You've missed far less than I have, and I am still planning to play.'

James smiled: 'Alright then.'

'See you tomorrow,' Prewett said, and then, nodding to the rest, he left them.

Just as they got to the front door, another person came out. Remus recognised the man as the Ravenclaw Quidditch captain. He also nodded to them all, and then seemed to head towards the Quidditch pitch.

'It looks like we're not the only ones to be practicing with Ravenclaws today,' Sirius muttered.

'Do you think?' Peter asked.

'Definitely,' James said, 'they're good friends, those two.'

'They had some fall out, you said,' Sirius asked.

'Yeah well, that was ages ago,' James shrugged.

'It's good to know they're friends again,' Sirius said.

Remus saw James giving Sirius an odd look, and then he smiled: 'Yeah, it is.'

Once more, Remus had the suspicion Sirius and James were having at least three conversations, all at once.   

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Sirius Black trusted James Potter. 

Sirius wasn't sure exactly what he felt about that. The only thing he knew was that it had been so obvious, and yet it had taken him so long to realise. It wasn't until Sirius had talked to Remus that Sirius realised that the conversation was pointless. He already trusted James. James had not exactly come quietly into his life, but somehow, unnoticed by Sirius, James had won his trust. Knowing that Sirius could give this to James, when it mattered so much to his friend, made Sirius relieved at his discovery, if nothing else.

Speaking of being relieved, Sirius was also grateful to find that James seemed to have caught on. This was good, as it saved Sirius needing to make a great big scene about it. He trusted James, and James seemed to have come to realise this.

While the whole "trust issue" could be put to bed, Sirius had other things that needed dealing with. That first evening James was back, Sirius knew better than to be fooled by James' easy going nature. He wasn't entirely sure how he knew this, whether it was all those books he had read, or whether it was just the way James sometimes seemed to become distant, fall quiet or in some way lose interest in what was happening around him. Whatever it was, it seemed to pass Remus and Peter by. 

'Hi,' Sirius said as he pulled the hangings of James' bed and crawled onto his bedsheets. There was no need to ask whether James was fine with it - he would be.

'Hi,' James said, but he turned his head away as he sat up. Predictably, he didn't ask Sirius to leave.

James was crying, Sirius realised. Crying, and ashamed of it. Which... yes, Sirius wouldn't want to be caught like that either.

'I'm sorry about your grandfather,' Sirius offered, and crawled over to sit next to James. 

James didn't turn to face him.

'I heard about him a bit, growing up,' Sirius admitted. 'Nothing good, naturally. Or nothing my family would consider good. I mean, he was the embodiment of a blood traitor. That's how I knew him to be great!'

'He was great,' James said quietly, turning finally to face Sirius.

Unsurprisingly, Sirius saw all the evidence he needed to confirm that he had been right about the crying. James' eyes were slightly swollen, and he was just drying his nose on his pyjama sleeve. But there were, thankfully, no new tears falling down his cheeks.

'Do you want to talk about it?' Sirius asked.

James shrugged, and Sirius felt that was an understandable answer. What was the point of talking about how you wished someone wasn't dead? It didn't change shit.

'Maybe you could tell me about him?' Sirius suggested after a short pause.

James hesitated for a second, then tentatively: 'Sure. Er...'

'What did you two do together?' Sirius asked as an answer to James' face, which plainly asked Sirius what on earth James was meant to tell him about Henry Potter.

'He had a shed that we would hang out in. Until a couple of years ago he used to own this massive broom collection, but even after he sold that, one of his favourite things was to buy different broom pieces and we'd try to assemble our own brooms. Of course, you've got those sets anyone can turn into a functioning broom, but that wasn't for grandad. He liked buying scraps of old brooms to see if he could "breathe new life into them".' 

James face lit up as he talked.

'He used to let me try the brooms we "fixed", but mum put a stopper to that after one of the brooms fell apart while I was airborne,' James laughed, 'mum was not happy.'

'Sounds grand,' Sirius agreed.

'It was,' James said, sobering somewhat. 'I can't believe he's gone.'

Sirius could tell James he was sorry once more, but what good would that do?

'Sometimes,' James said quietly, 'I just forget, and then when I remember, it's like I am in professor McGonagall's office all over again.'

'It will get better,' Sirius said, trying to project some confidence into his voice, 'give it time, mate.'

'Yeah,' James said, sounding doubtful.

'Want to visit the kitchen?' Sirius asked, thinking a distraction might be the right thing. 

It was curious what effect those words had. James looked as excited as he had done when he told Sirius he had made the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

'Yes!' 

'Alright,' Sirius said, making to get off the bed, but James grabbed him firmly.

'Not yet,' James said, and his eyes shone excitedly, 'I've got something to show you first.'

'I can't believe it,' Sirius whispered for the thousandth time as his hand stroked the material they were now hiding under. 'It's bloody awesome, this cloak.'

James turned to grin at him. They were waiting for Filch to move out of the way so they could continue down the stairs without being detected. It was a sodding shame the cloak didn't make you any less solid, or they would already have been a couple of floors further down.

'It's pretty neat,' James agreed.

Returning a little later from the kitchen, they saw Peeves, who was busy turning paintings in a corridor upside down. As most of the inhabitants were asleep, they had no way of escaping the inevitable danger before they tumbled down from what had been the bottom of their frames, trying desperately to cover themselves as furniture, food, books, and clothes were raining down on them from the ceiling - which had been the floor a moment earlier. For the outdoor paintings, the wizards and witches sometimes fell right down to the next painting and woke up whoever was in those, or they held on to the branches of trees for dear life. An unfortunate young wizard landed in the bed of a sick old witch, who screeched, her rotting arms chasing the flustered wizard as he raced out of the portrait.

James gave Sirius a look, and Sirius nodded. They turned down a corridor so they were hidden from view, and took off the cloak. 

'Need a hand?' Sirius asked casually as they stepped into view.

Peeves turned to look at them, his mean eyes glinting dangerously. 

'To be helped or to help? That is the question Peeves must answer,' Peeves mused. 'Peeves could need the help, oh yes, poor little Peeves-y could, but Peeves ought to let Filch know that there are ickle first years walking around after dark.'

'And when has Filch ever helped you?' Sirius raised his eyebrows. He was fairly confident Peeves wouldn't turn them in. But it didn't surprise him in the slightest that Peeves was making it difficult. Peeves only took pleasure from one thing, and sadly, James and Sirius were no exception as a source of this particular pleasure.

'Filch hates Peeves, the ickle Black boy is right. Peeves should accept their help, not put up a fight.' Peeves took a somersault and continued: 'But if Peeves helps Filch, he might think Peeves is alright.'

James had clearly decided to ignore Peeves and had turned a portrait of a stern-looking witch upside down. The witch was now yelling at him, and James had clearly decided the only right thing to do was to continue to spin the portrait until she shut up. Sirius shrugged and decided to join in the fun.

Begging Peeves to not turn them in would do nothing good. If anything that would likely result in Peeves calling for Filch. However, daring Peeves not to, or threatening him, would definitely result in Peeves turning them in. 

Peeves seemed satisfied with this. He decided to loosen the carpet at the top of a small set of stairs while Sirius and James kept doing the paintings. Sirius wasn't sure James had noticed what Peeves was up to, he seemed wholly absorbed in the task of turning the paintings around. 

'STUDENTS OUT OF BED!' Peeves suddenly shouted, making James jump. Sirius swore and looked around for something to throw at Peeves. 

'Peeves must test his idea, and you offered to help,' Peeves said innocently, a wicked grin spreading across his face. He flew down to the bottom of the stairs. 'STUDENTS OUT OF BED! STUDENTS -'

Sirius and James turned hoping to continue up towards Gryffindor Tower, but before they had reached the corner, they could hear Filch coming from that direction. Not keen to have Peeves see that they had a cloak, Sirius and James raced down the stairs after Peeves, Sirius making sure James too jumped over the loose carpet.

The two of them passed Peeves, and as soon as they were out of sight they threw the cloak over them. 

'Where are they Peeves?' they heard Filch pant, and then came a shout as the caretaker must have tripped. 

'PEEVES!' Filch bellowed. James and Sirius edged around the corner carefully, wanting to see what was happening, but nervous they would collide with Filch. 

They needn't have worried. Filch was clutching his leg at the bottom of the steps, and swearing loudly. Peeves cackled happily and floated out of sight. 

'Come on,' Sirius whispered, and they snuck around Filch who was still shouting about what he'd do to Peeves and moaning about his injured leg.

'Should we help?' James asked once they were out of earshot.

'No,' Sirius said firmly. 'That man would do far worse to us if he got it his way.'

James nodded, looking relieved. 

They owed Peeves, James and Sirius quickly came to realise, as sneaking around the castle over the following week became child's play now that the risk of Filch popping up was removed. Even day-time rule-breaking became easier as only professor McGonagall seemed to possess a similar instinct to Filch for spotting trouble, and she had classes to teach.

The foul man hobbled around on his injured leg, too slow to stop anyone, and James and Sirius were not the only ones to take advantage of Filch's "improved" pace.

'It's his bloody fault,' Sirius said to Mary who for some reason seemed to take pity on the caretaker. 

'He could go to Madam Pomfrey and she'd fix him up no trouble,' James agreed. 

Soon, however, the rumour started to spread (no doubt courtesy of Peeves) that Sirius and James had been involved in Filch's accident. Sirius felt "involved" was a strong way of putting it, and while it meant the two were hailed as heroes by many, it also meant they suddenly had a furious Filch after them. 

There was, naturally, no proof of their involvement, but when had such a minor detail ever stopped Argus Filch. Sirius was grateful they didn't have any detentions with the caretaker for the foreseeable future.

It especially worried Sirius that just like with Snivellus, it seemed like Filch directed most of his anger towards James. Sirius couldn't understand why. Of the two of them, Sirius was sure he was the sharper-tongued one, and James had a way with adults Sirius did not. The only reason Sirius could think of was that James was louder than him, liked to take more space, and ultimately sought out the attention, with all the risks that entailed. 

To Sirius, the attention he got was mostly a necessary evil for people to know what he was about - so they knew not to mess with him, and an unfortunate side-effect of all the cool stuff he and James got up to.

But it soon turned out Sirius had more things to worry about than just Filch's unquenched thirst for revenge. With the approaching final Quidditch match, the animosity between the two houses grew. Ciara Ryan might be right that James would be the chaser the least at risk on the day of the Quidditch match, as a first year student on a school broom, but as the rest of the team were mostly in their fifth and sixth year, James became the number one target on the team in the Hogwarts corridors. 

Fabian Prewett seemed to have anticipated this, and Sirius and James were therefore almost constantly surrounded by older Gryffindors who had taken up the mantle of offering protection in the final week leading up to the game. While Sirius would usually have found this frustrating, he found that he was less annoyed than he had expected, possibly due to the Hospital Wing quickly becoming full of clashing Gryffindors and Slytherins. 

In the end, nothing bad happened to James, though he wasn't entirely free of incidents. At one point an older Slytherin managed to hex James so his eyes were replaced by fish eyes sticking out on either side of his head. Unfortunately, James' sight was hampered by this, or Sirius would have dearly loved to put James in front of a mirror so he could see how utterly ridiculous he looked. Luckily, James seemed to have gotten the gist. Sirius therefore opted to lead James through crowded corridors, and the two sang "Grindylow in my pond" loudly until professor McGongall found them and sadly put James' eyes back to normal. 

McLaggen fared worse, as someone managed to put a potion in his pumpkin juice, which resulted in the chaser spending two days throwing up in the Hospital Wing before Madam Pomfrey and professor Slughorn were able to brew the right antidote. If McLaggen hadn't been a bit of a favourite with professor Slughorn, Sirius would have bet on the head of Slytherin taking his sweet time producing the antidote, but the few times Sirius saw the Potions master in those two days, he seemed rather flustered and stressed about the situation.

Finally, the evening before the match arrived, marked both by James' sudden lack of appetite, and Remus having the onset of a bad headache. Remus excused himself rather early that night, due to the noise in the common room, whereas Sirius, James, Peter, Maeve and Mary played Exploding Snap. Lizzie and Gemma, who claimed they didn't like the game, nevertheless watched the others play for a while. Before they went upstairs, both wished James good luck.

Just as the two girls left them, Lily Evans climbed through the portrait hole, her school bag hanging heavily by her side.

'Library, no doubt,' Mary said quietly before raising her voice so Evans could hear her over the loud crowd: 'Lily, want to join?' 

Evans came over, looking as frosty as she always did.

'That's alright, I think I'll go to bed,' Evans said in her trademark lofty voice. 'I would have thought you would want to do the same, Potter, seeming as it's a big game tomorrow?'

James seemed taken aback by Evans addressing him directly, rather than continuing her usual pretence that Sirius and James did not exist (which incidentally suited Sirius well).

'What's the fun in going to bed?' Sirius asked, before James got a word in. 

Of course, Sirius would be the first to encourage James to get some rest, but James wasn't likely to fall asleep for hours. Neither of them were ones for early nights, and with the big match, Sirius was doubtful James would have any hope of sleeping before way past midnight. Evans didn't need to know that though.

Evans sent him a look of deepest dislike, which was plainly meant to tell him that it wasn't him she'd asked. Sirius shrugged.

'Ah, Sirius is right,' Maeve chimed in. 'The craic before the match is half the fun! Sure, you'll see it yourself if you come an' stay a while this summer. The night before a Quidditch game, that's when the real magic happens – and unlike the rest, it doesn't matter a whit how the match turns out.'

'Although in this case, it's just a warm-up,' Sirius interjected, 'we'll win that Quidditch Cup.'

'Course we will,' Mary agreed.

'You'll watch, right?' James asked Evans. Sirius had to stop himself from smirking. James had asked every first year so far, clearly anxious to have a supportive audience at the game.

'Aye, don't be frettin', James,' Maeve grinned, who clearly had picked up on the same, 'Lily does like a good Quidditch match, even if she's not doin' it proper.'

At this, Evans rolled her eyes, bid them good night and marched upstairs.

'It's not even like she'll go to bed or anythin',' Maeve said, shaking her head.

'No, we'll find her revising for the exams when we go upstairs,' Mary said, grimacing. 'Honestly, it's stressful sharing a dorm with someone that worked up about the exams.' 

It was also stressful to wake up the following day and find that Remus had gone to the Hospital Wing feeling unwell. At breakfast he re-joined them, looking worse than he had the previous evening. 

'You don't have to come,' James said, looking very much like it cost him a great deal to say this.

'Madam Pomfrey gave me a potion for my headache,' Remus said in a way that told Sirius he too had picked up on the lack of sincerity in James' voice. 'If she's happy for me to walk out the doors of the infirmary, I think we can safely assume I am in the clear to enjoy myself.'     

James seemed satisfied by this, and a little relieved. 

Just then Duchess landed in front of James with a good luck card from his family. Sirius smiled into his tea. James really didn't need to worry about the level of support he had ahead of the game. Not everyone got letters from the keeper of the English national team wishing them good luck. But then again, not everyone was James Potter. 

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Fabian could have done without the entire sixth year, and all of Gryffindor, knowing how weak he was. In fact, probably all of Hogwarts knew, as most students followed the Inter-House Quidditch Cup, and as captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, his absence during most of April from the Quidditch pitch must have been known.

He could also do without Gideon constantly making a fuss about the smallest thing. 

'I am not cold, Gid - it's May,' Fabian complained as Gideon held out a thick woollen jumper Molly had made Fabian for Christmas.

'It's Scotland,' Gideon shot back, 'and it's late.'

'You're late for that prefect meeting or whatever it is.'

'I am only trying to -' Gideon started, visibly frustrated.

'If I get cold, I'll stop flying and head back to the castle.'

'Leave the man be, Gideon, or he'll chuck you off the team,' Jay said from his bed, not looking up from his copy of A Guide to Advanced Transfiguration. 

Fabian knew Jay meant well, but the fact that one of their team players was listening to how Gideon was mothering him did not serve to lift Fabian's mood, even if said player had survived sharing a dormitory with Gideon and Fabian for nearly six full years by now.

'He wouldn't dare, four days before the match.'

'Try me,' Fabian said, and in that moment, he believed his own words.

'As tempting as that is, you're right, I need to dash,' Gideon said, throwing the jumper onto Fabian's bed. 'Forget about the jumper then, what do I care?'

Gideon stopped halfway to the door: 'That came out wrong. Of course I care. About you - not the jumper.'

Fabian waved a hand. Even this was frustrating. He knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Gideon cared, but Gideon seemed determined to not leave any room without letting it be known. Like he keeps expecting it to be the last time he speaks to me, Fabian thought.

Gideon nodded and left. Fabian gathered his Quidditch gear.

'He's just worried about you,' Jay said, nose still buried in his Transfiguration book.

'I got that, thanks,' Fabian said, wincing slightly at the venom in his voice.

Jay closed his book. 'You don't get it though. You weren't here when McGonagall woke Gideon up to tell him you were being moved to St Mungo's - none of us knew whether you'd live or not.'

'Believe it or not Jay, as it was me who was ill, I know more about the situation than either you or Gideon.'

It had been a blow to get unwell like that. He'd not had the flu since he was a child. While he had known that he usually spent a few days in the Hospital Wing with a cold, when other students just needed one dose of a pepper-up potion to bounce back, he hadn't known how badly the flu affected him. 

Exactly what this meant for his chances of becoming an Auror Fabian didn't know - but it certainly wasn't good news.

Jay shrugged: 'If you want to go flying, you better hurry, or Gideon might find you outside our common room after curfew, and neither of you would want that.'

Jay was right, he had to hurry. Fabian had planned to meet Owen, and by this rate, he would be late indeed.

'I'd be surprised if you don't win the cup,' Owen said as they walked back from the pitch together. 'Jenny is a better seeker than Lucius Malfoy, and you only need fifty points to overtake us for the lead.'

Fabian wanted to believe Owen. Winning the cup suddenly seemed to matter a great deal more, as it would allow Fabian to prove to everyone that he was fine and that small stuff like the flu couldn't stop him. However, Fabian was not as convinced as Owen was. 

'You forget that we lost a brilliant chaser in Jenny when she took over as seeker.'

'You didn't have to replace Jenny with a first year,' Owen said fairly.

'No I didn't,' Fabian agreed, 'but I had to replace Jenny with the next best option. James Potter is good - it's just those stupid first year broom rules that means he can't keep up with the others.'

'At least there has been no more accidents on that front.'

Fabian had told Owen about what had happened before Christmas. If he was being honest, it was still something that sometimes played on Fabian's mind. He had known, so damn well, that James Potter had been flying those brooms in all sorts of conditions, and yet he hadn't interfered. Why not? Because he hadn't wanted to lose another match. Two trips to the Hospital Wing, first to see James, then Jenny, had changed Fabian's mind about winning. It wasn't that important. 

Yet, he yearned to lift the trophy over his head like never before. He wanted to see everyone's faces when he won. They would see that Fabian Prewett was as good as he'd always been.

'No, but there's enough to deal with as it is. I dunno Owen, winning feels far-fetched. But maybe I can prevent the snakes from snatching the trophy from you.'

'You're right... There has been a lot for you to deal with. How are you holding up?' Owen asked, slowing down and seeming to study Fabian, who quickly matched his friend's pace.

'Health-wise, I feel fine. It took some time to get back into things again, but I feel as fit as ever by now.'

'You look it too,' Owen said sincerely. Clearing his throat, he quickly continued: 'I mean, the way you fly - I would never have been able to guess you were ill recently.'

Fabian didn't know what to say to that.

'And then Potter's grandfather died, just to ensure that Gryffindor continued to practice with one player down,' Owen said, after Fabian failed to make any response to his previous remark.

'What? Oh yes, yes indeed.'

'He's managing now?'

'Losing a grandparent is never fun, but he seems to be doing alright.'

They were nearly at the doors now. 

'And what about you?' Owen asked.

'What do you mean? I just told you -'

'That you're doing well health-wise, yes, I heard that. I mean otherwise. How are you doing?' 

Fabian hesitated. Owen stopped, and Fabian realised he had done the same. Alice had told him off for not being open enough, so maybe he should tell Owen some of what was going through his head. Yet, it wasn't pretty. 

'So not great?' Owen asked gently. 'C'mon.'

Owen took Fabian by the arm and steered him a little away from the door, sitting him down on a rock, and taking a seat next to him.

'I can probably guess some of it,' Owen's voice was still gentle, still careful. 'It can't be easy, being - ill like that.'

Owen's voice shook slightly. 

'And it can't have been easy, coming back and wanting to forget about it all, and probably feeling like you can't because of all these constant reminders.' 

No, it wasn't easy.

Fabian buried his face in his arms. He felt the warm, welcoming pressure of Owen's hand on his back.

After a few moments, Fabian felt he had gathered his thoughts enough to speak. 

'I hate it,' he said, quietly. 'I hate how Gideon is afraid I'll fall apart any moment, or how Alice tenses every time I cough or clear my throat. I hate that Marshall seems to be stopping by the table every breakfast just to check I am not suddenly unwell. Professor McGonagall even seems to be giving me an easier time in Transfiguration, and that is just mind-blowingly bizarre.'

Owen smiled weakly in response to that last comment, but he didn't say anything - inviting Fabian to go on. It was easy to continue, now that he had started.

'I have to write to my sister Molly about twice a week to assure her that everything is fine, and I am sure Gideon writes as frequently to our parents with the same reassurances. And I get that I am lucky to have family and friends that care, I do, but I just want things to go back to the way they were. I spent so much of my first year at Hogwarts not feeling normal, all pale and weak and - honestly - a bit scared. It took ages to believe that things were safe again - that I was truly fine, and now everything feels different, and I hate it.'

Owen had kept running his hand in circles across Fabian's back, but now he stopped.

'I don't know what to say. It sounds awful.'

Fabian didn't know what Owen could say either. What was there to say? His family weren't in the wrong for caring about him. Merlin only knew how much he loved them all in return. And should something ever happen to Alice, he was sure he'd be worse than she and Marshall were combined. It didn't make it any easier though.

Then there was the guilt his family always seemed to carry around with them. Like it had been their fault and not Fabian's own stupidity. But... there was no point dwelling on the past.

Owen was looking at him intently, Fabian realised. 

'I am sorry,' Fabian said, suddenly feeling ashamed. 'You didn't need to hear all that.'

'Maybe not, but I wanted to hear it all,' Owen replied in a whisper. He leaned closer to Fabian.

Fabian suddenly became very aware of the fact that Owen hadn't removed his hand. It slid from his back to his shoulder as Owen shifted to face Fabian more directly. Owen's warm eyes never left Fabian's, and without thinking, Fabian leaned closer too.

'Really?' he asked.

Owen smiled, though he looked distinctly nervous: 'I care about you, Fabian. Of course I want to hear what you're going through.'

Was Owen moving closer to him, or was he moving closer to Owen? His breath was no longer coming out evenly, and he was sure Owen was holding his own breath.

Fabian's lips touched Owen's. He'd never kissed a man before, and although there was a small voice in his head that told him it wasn't right, a much louder voice told him nothing had felt more right in his life. 

Owen responded, pulling him in closer. Every part that touched Owen's body felt on fire. The protesting voice died out as Fabian wanted more of everything. Then, Owen suddenly pushed back - not forcefully, but enough that Fabian knew to let go, and Fabian stopped, studying the man that sat in front of him.

Owen's cheeks were flushed. He looked dazed, and though he looked alive, more alive than Fabian had ever seen him, Owen also looked shaken.

'Sorry,' Fabian said, quickly.  

'Shit,' Owen muttered. 'Shit, I didn't mean - let's just head back to the castle, okay?'

The happiness that had taken over every cell in Fabian's body seemed to vanish quicker than Wilkie Twycross could disapparate.

'Of course. It doesn't - if you didn't like - I didn't mean to -...'

Fabian was struggling to find the right words.

'No, I didn't mean to either,' Owen said, but Fabian suspected they meant different things. Fabian hadn't meant to pressure Owen, or do anything against his will. By the look of Owen's face, it seemed like he hadn't meant for this to happen at all.

'I am still glad you told me everything,' Owen said as they neared the point they would go their separate ways. 'We're friends - right? We're still friends.'

Fabian could only nod. 

As he neared the Fat Lady a few minutes later, he did indeed see Gideon, who was clearly on his way back too. As it was past curfew, Gideon had every right to take points from Gryffindor - he probably should do so - but Fabian didn't give him the chance. He had given the password to the Fat Lady and crawled through the portrait hole before Gideon had reached the end of the corridor.

Fabian threw himself onto his bed, not bothering to change, and drew his curtains.

'I am sorry,' Gideon said, a few minutes later as he ignored the closed hangings and sat down at the edge of Fabian's bed. 'I know I am being a bit of a prat at the moment.'

Gideon was decidedly not the prat of the two of them, and Fabian wanted to tell him that, but speaking now would betray the fact that he was crying. The idea of crying so near his 17th birthday would have mortified him, hadn't the evening already been so mortifying. 

Fabian was lying with his back to his brother, so that Gideon wouldn't be able to see the tears falling down Fabian's cheeks. Tears of shame. Tears of regret. Tears that held Fabian company in a strange sort of way, yet they isolated him further from all the boys in their dormitory.

'I was - I am scared, Fabes, but... it's no good living this fear, I know. I will do better, I promise.'

You're fine, Fabian wanted to say. You're a bit annoying, but you're the best brother anyone could have asked for. 

Fabian knew he was hurting his brother by not responding. Had Gideon known the real reason why Fabian was quiet, it would have hurt Gideon even more, so Fabian ignored his brother as best as he could. By the time Gideon left, Fabian was no longer sure if the tears he was shedding were about what had happened with Owen or about how much he felt like he was letting his brother down. 

'I hope this time, you catch the Snitch without landing yourself in the Hospital Wing,' Owen said to Jenny as he came to their table on Saturday morning.

While things had been decidedly awkward between Owen and Fabian since their kiss, Owen had made good on his words that they were still friends. Perhaps deciding that his show of support would be wasted if he then went onto ignore what Fabian had told him, Owen had tried harder than ever to resume some kind of normality in the way he treated Fabian. This included using Fabian as a human shield when Peeves was pelting water balloons at students in the hallway before lunch on Thursday. Gideon had been furious, Alice had seemed conflicted, but Fabian had laughed, before pushing Owen ahead of him just as another balloon was aimed at them.

That didn't make it alright.

'I'm not making any promises, Owen,' Jenny said to her friend.

'That's not a promise I'd object to hearing,' Fabian almost groaned. 'Robins, please make it through the match in one piece, the Slytherins aren't going to go easy with the Bludgers.'

'True, but I've got you two to keep me safe,' Jenny said brightly to him and Gideon.

'We can't make any promises,' Gideon said, frowning.

'Just keep your eyes wide open, all of you,' Owen said. 'Slytherin is out for blood.'

'We can manage,' Gideon replied coolly. Gideon had not had much time for Owen lately, and though Fabian could understand his brother's reluctance to forgive Owen for their previous fallout (which had, according to Alice, really been Fabian's own fault), it had also meant that Fabian had stopped sharing things with Gideon where Owen was concerned.

Owen wasn't wrong though, Fabian thought. The lead up to the match had been full of the usual Gryffindor-Slytherin clashes that always precedes their matches, but as with every year, Fabian couldn't shake the feeling it was getting worse.

Maybe that was why Fabian spent more time than he had planned telling the team to be careful. 

'Relax Fabian,' Jay said, grinning at him in the changing rooms. 'You want to win, don't you?'

'No, Fabian prefers it if we lose,' Gideon replied dryly.

'Preferably with an embarrassingly high margin,' Jenny agreed.

'I'm confident we can manage that,' Tiberius McLaggen offered.

'Fabian would prefer if everyone shut up and listened,' Fabian grumbled. 

This was why Gideon was a better leader than Fabian. Had Fabian spent too much time focusing on what could go wrong and not enough on the goal? They were all looking at him.

'I would have thought winning was a given,' Fabian said, trying to push the doubts in his mind to one side. 'If winning isn't a given to you, then you're not the person I thought you were when I picked you for this team.' 

Fabian looked around the room. He felt like he was playing a part, and he had no idea if he was playing it well.

'When we lost in November, I swore we'd never lose again, and I have not changed my mind on that. Have any of you?'

Nobody said so, if they had.

'I didn't think so. While it's comforting to know that the one time we did lose, we lost with the smallest margin of anyone, that's not going to cut it for this match. If Slytherin wins scoring less than 190 points, Ravenclaw wins the cup. If Slytherin wins with 200 points or more, they win the cup. Either way, we don't win anything. Now, we don't win the cup if we haven't scored fifty points before we catch the Snitch either. I am not interested in second. Robins, your hands don't touch the Snitch until we've got fifty points, okay?'

''Course, captain.'

'I mean it. We're not ending the match with less than fifty points, and you will do your best to make sure Slytherin doesn't get a chance to end it either.'

Jenny nodded.

'Same goes for us,' Fabian said to Gideon. 'Lucius Malfoy is not getting near that Snitch as long as we can send Bludgers his way.'

Gideon lifted his beater's bat as way of response.

'Your jobs should be obvious,' Fabian said turning to Jay and the chasers. 'Same as always. Jordan, make sure the Slytherins don't score. It is especially important they don't get to fifty points.'

'They won't get to ten points, if I have something to say about it.'

'And you three, get us the fifty points we need early. That is the key to victory in this match. As soon as that's done, Robins is free to hunt the Snitch, and you all become less of a target for the Carrows, freeing up Gideon and my time to keep Robins from harm.'

James nodded enthusiastically, Tiberius gave him a salute, and Ciara grinned: 'Easy.'

Fabian wasn't sure it would be easy, but he forced himself to smile back: 'Alright team, let's show them what we've got!'

It was mayhem. If Fabian had wanted to prove to the school that he was, in fact, fully recovered, this match quickly made the arguments for him. The Slytherin beaters were vicious, not that Fabian and Gideon were showing much more mercy.

The chasers on either side had a hard time getting the Quaffle anywhere near the goalpost before they were pelted by Bludgers. Wendy Macnair looked to be playing with a broken nose, courtesy of Fabian, and Tiberius McLaggen seemed to struggle with his shoulder after a Bludger from Alecto Carrow had hit him.

Moreover, not a single chaser seemed to have not been hit at least once by a Bludger and Fabian's muscles were protesting painfully. The part of him that still worried that he was somehow weaker than Gideon was pleased to see Gideon struggle too, and he hated himself for it.

'After an early lead by Slytherin, it is now forty-forty, and neither team seems willing to let the Quaffle pass through their goal post one more time, knowing, of course, that this would put the competing team into the lead for the cup, should they succeed in capturing the Snitch,' Berta Jorkins reported. Even Jorkins didn't seem to be in the mood for her usual scathing commentary.

Well, until Amycus Carrow decided to make a right fool out of himself. Fabian had sent a Bludger after Travers, and Carrow, being not too far from Travers, shot after it to try to send it towards one of the Gryffindor chasers instead. 

'I can't believe it,' Jorkins screeched gleefully, 'Amycus Carrow swings his bat, misses the Bludger and - yes - the Bludger hit his wrist. That looked extremely painful! He won't be swinging that club any more! Wow, talk about pathetic play from Amycus Carrow, crowning a terrible season for the beater.'

Slytherin even called timeout as Carrow dropped his beater's bat. 

'I think his wrist might be broken,' Gideon said, as he flew up to Fabian, taking advantage of the break, and studying the Slytherins with distaste.

'This might be our chance,' Ciara said, who likewise had joined them.

Fabian felt absolutely no regret as Carrow walked off the pitch, cradling his injured wrist. He wasn't sure it was broken, but whatever it was, he was glad it hurt bad enough for Carrow to pull out of the game. That was one less beater to cause any further injury to his team.

'You okay Ryan?' Fabian asked. Ciara looked as exhausted as he felt, and he noticed her rub her right leg where a Bludger had hit her earlier. 

'Sure, a bit of bruisin' won't stop me,' Ciara said confidently.

Amycus Carrow's departure from the pitch seem to have breathed new life into the Gryffindor team, and while Diggory blocked McLaggen's next shot, it was the real first attempt at scoring in far too long from either side. Gryffindor would score, soon enough. Fabian felt confident that they were finally getting the upper hand on the match.

A little later, Fabian saw Gideon fly towards a Bludger at the Gryffindor side of the pitch, and he guessed Gideon was hoping to send it after Lucius Malfoy to keep him on his toes. Fabian followed his chasers up the pitch. James passed the Quaffle to Ciara, who passed it to Tiberius. 

The Bludger didn't catch Fabian by surprise, as he had seen Alecto Carrow hit it towards Tiberius, who in any case passed the Quaffle to James. What did surprise Fabian - and it was a horrible surprise at that - was the sound of something heavy smashing into bone. He turned just in time to see Diggory, white faced, fly out to James, shouting at Carrow all the while: 'What in Merlin's name do you think you're doing?'

Fabian didn't need Jorkins' commentary to tell him that Carrow had thrown her beater's bat at the first year. Diggory was holding onto a barely conscious James and as Fabian flew nearer, he saw that James had let go of his broom entirely, his left hand pinning his right one to his chest.

Grabbing James' broom handle with one hand, and pushing his own down at the same time, Fabian and Diggory managed to get James safely to the ground. 

'Madness,' Diggory huffed, but kicked off just the same to re-join the game.

James had sunk to the ground, ghostly pale. Fabian looked around for a teacher, he wasn't sure James would manage to make his way up to the Hospital Wing on his own. No one was forthcoming.

Fabian was vaguely aware that Ciara was taking a penalty shot. By the sounds of things she missed it.

'We're going to need to get that off,' Fabian said as calmly as he managed, as he crouched down next to James, pointing at his Quidditch glove. A pair of horrified, tear-filled eyes met his. 

'Don't worry,' Fabian promised, taking out his wand. 'I'll be careful.'

James nodded, but he looked scared, his small body trembling, his breathing coming in ragged gasps. Fabian felt his blood boil as he took in James' arm, which was bent at an unnatural angle. Merlin, he'd skin Carrow himself. But first...

Fabian took James' hand as gently as he could in his, using a severing charm to cut the glove. He had known the gloves were a present from James' friends, James had told him so two months ago, but Fabian couldn't risk his arm swelling inside the glove - he knew from experience it would just make things worse.

As carefully as he could he prised James' injured hand free of the glove, ignoring James' pained sobs.

'How is he?' 

Fabian looked up to see Black approaching, looking about as pale as his friend.

'He'll be fine as soon as Madam Pomfrey gets a look at him,' Fabian reassured. 'Can you get him there?'

Black nodded, and together they helped James to his feet. The messy haired boy's face was glistening from sweat and tears.

'C'mon,' Black muttered, putting a careful arm around his friend. James stumbled slightly, but then seemed to get his bearings just enough to let his friend guide him off the pitch.

Fabian grabbed his broom, blood still boiling. Throwing a beater's bat at players was not okay. Attacking a first year like that to boot was just about criminal. He looked to Gideon, who wasn't far away, and saw the same anger flash in his eyes. 

Fuck the Slytherins, Fabian thought, we're going to show them exactly who they're messing with. And as Fabian circled the pitch looking for Bludgers, he saw the faces of the rest of his team, and he knew they all felt the same.

Gryffindor was going to win this match, win the cup even, and there was absolutely nothing Slytherin could do to stop them. Rationally, of course, Fabian knew their chances had taken a dramatic turn for the worse, one chaser down, but he didn't care. They would win.

They had to.     

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Slytherin scored not long after Potter had left the pitch with that Black boy. The roar from the Slytherins drowned out the groans from the Gryffindors, and Gideon saw Carrow and Travers high five each other quickly in passing. The sight made him feel sick. Gryffindor needed to score, and soon. If Lucius Malfoy spotted the Snitch now, there was only so much they could do to keep him away from it, and if Malfoy did manage to catch the Snitch, Slytherin would win the cup, Ravenclaw would be second and Gryffindor would be third. 

Gideon hit a Bludger with such force that had it hit Travers, it would have seriously injured him. Sadly, Travers ducked in time. It wasn't often Gideon aimed to injure, but at the moment, he found himself especially angry at the Slytherin team. What were they thinking, letting Alecto Carrow throw her bat like that at James Potter?! 

Unlike Fabian, Gideon had more mixed feelings about Potter. He wasn't sure Potter was as good as Fabian claimed he was, and Gideon had to deal with Potter - and his friends - more than Fabian did outside of Quidditch practice. Potter and his friend Black had spent more time in detention over the school year than the rest of their year put together, if Frank Longbottom was to be believed, and he usually was. 

Yet, Gideon didn't dislike Potter. He was clearly dedicated to the team, and in any case, any person who held Fabian in high regard - which Potter clearly did - couldn't be all that bad. And he's twelve, for Merlin's sake, Gideon thought angrily as he hit yet another Bludger, this time aiming at Macnair.

'We can still win this,' Fabian said a little later, having called timeout. Slytherin had scored two more goals, meaning Slytherin led at 70 points to Gryffindor's 40 points.

'We've got no chance being a chaser down,' McLaggen said annoyed. 

McLaggen winced as he tried to roll his shoulder, then swore: 'I am barely any bloody use with this shoulder as it is.'

Ciara said nothing, which in itself was telling.

'No,' Jenny said, stamping her feet. 'They don't get to hurt James like that and get away with it. They don't.'

'Sure, Jen, but how are we meant to beat 'em if we can't score?'

'We beat them but lose the cup,' Jenny said. 'Fabian, I know you want to win this cup, but if I see the Snitch, I am going to go for it. They don't get to win anything.'

Gideon saw Jenny look intently at Fabian. Despite her confidence, she was looking to her captain for approval.

'I agree,' Fabian said, slowly. He didn't truly seem to agree, but he was clearly feeling the pressure of the team.

'No,' Gideon said. 'We can still win the cup, as well as this match.'

'How, exactly?' McLaggen asked.

'We use our brains,' Gideon said, looking at Fabian. 'Come on, Fabian, this is Quidditch. You're a library on this shit. What can we do?'

Fabian seemed deep in thought. Madam Hooch was walking towards them.

'Any time now,' McLaggen said, still rubbing his shoulder.

'I've got one idea,' Fabian said, glancing over at Madam Hooch. 'Alright, listen quickly.'

/

The plan could be described as unsportsman-like. Was it far-fetched? Definitely. Could it work? Possibly.

Jenny was circling the pitch, approaching the Slytherin goalposts just as McLaggen and Ciara were pelting down the pitch passing the Quaffle between them. Fabian and Gideon were following the chasers as best as they could. They had to give McLaggen and Ciara one chance to score, which meant keeping the three Slytherin chasers, and two Bludgers, away from them.

'Has Jenny Robins of Gryffindor spotted the Snitch at long last!?' Bertha Jorkins asked eagerly as Jenny dived, a look of concentration on her face, just in front of the Slytherin goalposts. The plan was to both block Amos Diggory's view and - ideally - distract him at the same time. 

Ciara threw the Quaffle the moment Jenny blocked her from the view of the Slytherin keeper, and it flew through the left hoop. The Gryffindor side roared their approval at finally being in the run-in for the cup. The Slytherins booed, loudly, and not entirely without justification. Gideon guessed the rest of the school were still reserving their judgement on that whole episode.

'Lucius Malfoy is going to have to do a lot of explaining this evening - he's not even following Robins -.'

Well, Gideon thought, it wasn't Malfoy we tried to fool.

'GRYFFINDOR WINS! Robins catches the Snitch only seconds after Ryan scores the team's fifth goal, making it 200 to 70 for Gryffindor. WE WON!'

Madam Hooch's whistle sounded across the pitch, and then Gideon could hear nothing more as the stadium exploded. 

Gideon looked over at his brother, who looked just as shocked as Gideon felt. Then they both burst out laughing. The bluff turned out to be no bluff at all. This was too good to be true.

'WE WON, WE WON, WE WON!' Jenny cheered as she was speeding towards them and nearly knocked Fabian off his broom as she crashed into him, hugging him.

'YES!' Jay shouted.

'That was brilliant flying, Robins,' McLaggen said once they had all landed, which was more complicated than it needed to be, as nobody seemed willing to let go of each other.

'CLASS!' Ciara Ryan was grinning from ear to ear: 'You're a genius, Jen!'

'You weren't so bad yourself, scoring that final goal,' Jenny said, her face flushed and a couple of tears rolling down her cheek.

'No need to be sad,' Jay teased. 'We won the cup.'

Jenny laughed, wiping her tears: 'Shut it.'

Gideon looked to see wave after wave of crimson supporters pouring over the barriers onto the field. Hands were raining down on their backs. Professor McGonagall, who looked as exhausted as Gideon felt, was congratulating a dazed looking Fabian, and then as she turned to speak with Jenny, Gideon spotted the most beautiful creature in this world, her round face split in a smile even wider than McGonagall's as she threw her arms around Fabian. 

'YOU DID IT! YOU - DID - IT!' 

Even through all the sound, Gideon could hear Alice's shouts. Fabian still seemed to register less than half of what was going on around him, but Gideon saw that his brother squeezed Alice tightly.

'Congratulations, mate!' 

Gideon turned to see Marshall. Marshall grinned at Gideon, holding a Gryffindor flag.

'This was all Fabian and Jenny, believe me,' Gideon said, with feeling.

'GID, YOU WON! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!' 

Suddenly Alice was there, and Gideon felt her arms around him. He had no idea how long they stood there, hugging each other, but the moment he felt her pull slightly away, he knew it hadn't been long enough.

Looking into her gorgeous eyes, Gideon forgot all about maintaining their friendship. He couldn't possibly look at something so wonderful, so alive, as Alice was just then, and let her go. Her face still close, she too seemed to pause, studying him.

'I want to kiss you,' Gideon murmured stupidly, ignoring the teachers, her brother and his brother. 

Had Gideon thought Alice had looked happy before? Her eyes lit up and she laughed before she leaned closer. Their lips met, and time stopped.

'Merlin, I've wanted to do that for a long time,' Alice whispered into his ear as they finally broke free for air.

Gideon put his arms around her waist and pulled her in so he could feel her body press up against his. Now that he had her, he wasn't sure he'd ever let her go. 

Then Alice swore so loudly that it felt like Gideon's eardrum burst. Looking at her, he was surprised to find all happiness gone, being replaced with something he rarely saw on her face: anger.

Gideon turned to follow Alice's gaze. How quickly happiness could shatter and be replaced with something vile and uncontrollable.

'I am going to kill him,' Gideon said, reaching into his robes for his wand.

'Don't be stupid,' Alice said, her voice shaking. 'There are teachers here.'

Jenny Robins was also kissing someone. 

'That traitorous -'

'I know,' Alice said quickly. 'He's - fuck him.'

The swear word fell so easily from Alice, who rarely let a bad word cross her lips. But if someone deserved it, it was Owen bloody Redpath, who was making out with the Gryffindor chaser.

Fabian, who had just received the enormous Quidditch Cup from professor Dumbledore, looked purposefully anywhere but at the two kissing so close to him. Gideon wasn't sure what Fabian and Owen was - or had been - but he had the distinct impression that Owen had led Fabian on. 

'Longbottom,' Alice said quickly, nodding to Frank Longbottom, who, looking ecstatic, was clearly making his way to Fabian to congratulate him.

'I'll handle Frank,' Gideon said quickly. 'You get Fabian away from here. Get him to check on Potter or something.'

Alice nodded, and while the moment between them seemed almost a distant memory already, Alice squeezed his hand as they left each other, and the warmth of her skin promised a future with more kisses. 

'Frank!' Gideon said, all the while keeping half an eye on Alice's progress as she approached Fabian.

'Gideon!' Frank beamed at him. 'Well done! Well done indeed! I was just making my way over to congratulate -'

'Fabian thought he'd go and check on Potter,' Gideon cut Frank off quickly. 'Why don't you save it for the common room - I thought we might head up there now, to make sure we catch anyone trying to smuggle in something really bad for the party. I think McGonagall will overlook a bit of butterbeer - and even some elf-made wine for the older students - but firewhisky is probably something we should stay clear of.'

Frank looked momentarily taken aback, then he smiled again: 'This, Gideon, is why I am going to have no hesitation recommending you for Head Boy next year - not that I have a lot to say in that matter.'

Gideon didn't quite know what to say to that. It was some compliment to receive from Frank Longbottom, who had been accepted (conditionally) into the Auror programme as the only student this year. Last year there had also only been one person accepted into the programme: Rabastan Lestrange. 

Frank had worked with Gideon for two years now, one year as a fellow prefect, one as Head Boy. To know Frank thought that highly of him was both flattering and intimidating.

They started walking towards the castle.

'What an end the my time at Hogwarts,' Frank said, 'Gryffindor winning the Quidditch Cup.'

'Now you just need to get those grades. Should be easy - I doubt the Auror office would be asking for much,' Gideon teased.

'I'll be alright, don't you worry,' Frank grinned. 'Still,' he hesitated, 'it will be weird, leaving this place. When you start, it feels like you'll always be here, and then suddenly, one day...'

'It sneaks up on you, I guess,' Gideon said.

'Do you know what you want to do after Hogwarts?' Frank asked.

'Not a clue,' Gideon said - wondering if he was speaking truthfully. He knew what he wanted to do, but there was no money in it, nor was he willing to leave Alice and Fabian behind - something he would surely have to do if he was going to pursue his dream. No. His dream was right here, with Alice and his family.

'Have you considered becoming an Auror?'

Gideon laughed: 'That seems to be the only thing everyone around me wants to do, but it's not for me, Frank. That's all Alice and Fabian - and you.'

Frank frowned: 'Fawley and Prewett want to become Aurors?'

'Yeah, why?'

'It's difficult to get in, that's all.'

Gideon stopped, forgetting his suggestion to beat the crowd to the Gryffindor Tower: 'If you think I've got a chance, then those two do as well.'

'I am sure they aren't bad -'

'Aren't bad? Frank, Fabian and Alice were the two top scoring students in our O.W.Ls!'

'Really?' Frank sounded surprised. 'But they're not prefects.'

Because that was the only mark of success to Frank Longbottom. Maybe Fabian had been right after all. The guy was a pompous arse.

'Alice doesn't like stuff like that, and professor Sprout knows it. Besides, Amelia is probably a better prefect, even if she's not as outstandingly good at school as Alice is. As for Fabian, he probably fooled around a bit too much before - but when his O.W.Ls came around he surprised us all.'

'Truth be told,' Gideon continued. Now that he had started, he was going to say something that had been on his mind for some time: 'I think Fabian would have been a much better prefect than me.' 

Gideon could tell Frank was unconvinced.

'Fabian is much better than me at de-escalating situations. He knows when to tell me to back off reporting students and when to "let me go all prefect" as he calls it. Gryffindors respect him in a way they certainly don't respect me, and he's just led the team to victory in an incredibly difficult situation. Hogwarts promotes too many of us into power who the average student does not relate to, rather than focusing on those the students find approachable and inspiring.'

Gideon paused, taking a deep breath. He had surprised himself, and, by the look on Frank's face, he'd surprised Frank too.

'That's really all I have to say,' Gideon finished somewhat lamely. 

'Let's get going,' he suggested when Frank didn't say anything, noticing the scarlet crowd that was finally making their way from the pitch.

Frank followed Gideon, seemingly deep in thought. Just as they got to the Fat Lady, Frank seemed to come back to the present. 

'You're right, you know,' Frank said, slowly. 'About Pr- Fabian. He's easy to underestimate.'

'Because he underestimates himself,' Gideon said, thinking of the times Fabian told Gideon he wasn't a leader.

'And while I don't know Fawley, she seems sweet.'

'She's the best!' Gideon said, without hesitation.

'I gather you think that,' Frank said, and the smile that Gideon had seen on Frank's face as they had met on the Quidditch pitch was back. Then Frank did something very unFrank-like, he winked at Gideon. 

Gideon felt his cheeks burn.

'Good on you,' Frank said, clapping him on the back. 'Alright, if you had hidden some illegal booze, where would you stash it until the party?'  

This was one of the many areas Fabian would have an advantage, Gideon thought, but he refrained from using that as an example.

Chapter Text

Sirius found himself sprinting onto the Qudditch pitch before he was fully conscious of the decision to leave his seat. Shit! He didn't want to think about what had happened or how much pain James must be in. Action - helping... that was the way forward.  

'How is he?' Sirius asked Fabian Prewett as soon as he was sure the Quidditch captain could hear him. 

Relief flickered in Prewett's brown eyes as he looked up. 

'He'll be fine as soon as Madam Pomfrey gets a look at him. Can you get him there?'

Sirius nodded and knelt down next to Fabian. 

James' arm was bent in a way that made Sirius' stomach twist uncomfortably. Madam Pomfrey will sort him out no time, Sirius had to remind himself.

James eyes were unfocused, his face deadly pale, his breaths shallow, but all things considered, Sirius felt James was holding it together surprisingly well. It wasn't often Sirius wondered about this, but for once it occurred to him that he - Sirius - might have been considerably less calm if his arm had looked like that. 

As Sirius and Prewett helped him up, James winced, and swayed. Sirius put an arm around him, hoping to steady his best friend. 

'C'mon,' Sirius said quietly to James. The sooner they got to the matron, the better. 

As they made to leave, James stumbled ever so slightly, but then he seemed to come around enough to put one foot ahead of the other, and Sirius managed to lead him off the pitch.

They soon ran into Remus and Peter. 

'James!' Peter exclaimed worriedly. 'Are you okay?'

'What do you think, you bloody idiot?!' Sirius snapped.

Peter fell quiet, and Sirius focused his attention on coaxing James up to the castle. He knew Remus was probably giving him some sort of look to remind him that he hadn't been very nice to Peter, but Sirius wasn't in the mood. The only thing anyone should concern themselves with - as far as Sirius could understand - was getting James help as quickly and painlessly as possible. 

They had to stop twice. Once when they had nearly reached the castle and then again when they reached the right floor. 

'You're doing great,' Remus said encouragingly as James sank to the floor the second time. 

Sirius sat down next to him. He wasn't sure if it was for James' benefit, or his own, that he was so unwilling to leave James' side. 

'Not far left,' Sirius agreed. 

James was still trembling, his breathing was even more laboured than before and his usually messy hair was plastered to his clammy head.

'We could fetch Madam Pomfrey if you like?' Remus asked.

James shook his head: 'just... one min,' he mumbled.

''course,' Sirius said, trying to project some confidence.

'Take all the time you need,' Remus agreed.

James made the tiniest of nods.

'What are you kids doing 'ere?' a nasty and thoroughly unwelcome voice asked.

Filch, leg finally healed, was walking down the corridor. 

'Shouldn't you be out wat-' 

Filch stopped, eyes widening in recognition. 

'You two!' he hissed dangerously at Sirius and James.

James' trembles doubled, and his body seemed to press harder against Sirius, as if he could disappear into his friend. There was no opportunity to speak, but James didn't need to tell him anything. For the first time Sirius had known him, James seemed scared of the caretaker. It made Sirius' blood boil. 

Sirius helped James up.

'Filch, please,' Remus pleaded, but to no avail. The caretaker looked ready to skin them alive.

'I-' James started, but he didn't get further. Instead sick spilled out of his mouth and onto the floor. 

Sirius felt slightly nauseated as well as the smell assaulted his nostrils, but he forced himself to focus on everything else that was happening. Filch roared angrily at the sick now covering the floor.

'Filth! Disease! Befoulment of the corridors!' 

Sirius felt James struggling to remain upright. He, Sirius, had had enough. 

'LEAVE US ALONE!' Sirius shouted. 

If he hadn't been the only thing between James and the floor, he would have let go of his friend to attack this foul creature. James would be fine as soon as they got to the Hospital Wing and here was this poor excuse of a man slowing them down.

'What's going on?' came the crisp voice of Madam Pomfrey, who was rushing towards them. Behind her followed the small figure of Peter, who must have slipped away to get help when Filch appeared. 

'James is unwell,' Remus said quickly. 'We were on our way to see you.'

'These students -' Filch started, but one look from Madam Pomfrey shut him up.

'Quidditch!' Madam Pomfrey huffed angrily as she took in the sorry sight of James in his scarlet robes. 'First Carrow, now you. Follow me, Potter.'

She waved her wand and the sick disappeared instantaneously. 

Sirius felt a stupendous amount of relief as James sank down on a hospital bed. It took Madam Pomfrey next to no time to heal James' arm, though she muttered angrily about dangerous sports for longer. 

'You'll stay here for a bit,' she said sternly. 'You need rest after what you put your body through.'

It was Carrow and Filch that had put James through this, Sirius thought, but he didn't argue on his friend's behalf. Instead he leaned back in the chair he had just taken, and closed his eyes. When he opened them, James was already lying on top of the bed covers, a blanket draped over him. James still looked pale, his eyes already closed, but the pain seemed to be all gone, his face relaxed. 

Sirius took the glasses off James' face and placed them on the nightstand. It was over.

Nobody said anything for a while, not until Sirius was sure James was asleep. 

'Thanks, Pete, for getting Madam Pomfrey,' he said finally. Sirius wasn't overly fond of interventions by any adults, but Madam Pomfrey had come in the nick of time as far as Sirius was concerned. 'That was... some quick thinking. Truly.'

Peter beamed.

Just then, the doors to the Hospital Wing opened, and Fabian Prewett came in, followed by Alice Fawley - or whatever her name was. They looked so miserable nobody bothered asking who had won. Sirius thought one might be able to hear the commentary from the Hospital Wing, but the match must have finished by the time they had arrived, and now, Sirius was happy it had. There had been no need for James to listen to the defeat of his own team, on top of everything else. 

'How is he?' Prewett asked, taking a seat next to Sirius.

'Madam Pomfrey healed him in about a second,' Sirius said, desiring to erase the awfulness of the last half an hour or so with his own words. 'So he's all good. But she thought it best if he rested here for a bit.'

Prewett nodded. The Quidditch captain showed no sign of intending to leave, but then again, the Hospital Wing might not be a bad place to hide after having led his team to a second loss of the season.

'You okay?' Prewett asked Remus, suddenly. 

Sirius looked over at his friend. With the colour slowly returning to James' face, Remus was now the palest of them all. He looked exhausted. Sirius remembered that Remus had gone to Madam Pomfrey only this morning with a headache. This match had been long and draining even before Carrow had decided to be an absolute... well, it had been a long match and the following events had been worse still.

'It's just a headache,' Remus said, smiling weakly.

'Madam Pomfrey might be able to help with that.' There was nothing but kindness in the Quidditch captain's voice.

'She has already given me something,' Remus said, quickly, 'but I might go and see if she has anything else.'

With that Remus got up and headed towards Madam Pomfrey's office. 

'Is he okay?' Prewett asked the others, a frown appearing on his forehead. Fawley too looked concerned.

'Yes,' Sirius said. He knew Prewett meant well, but he didn't know Remus and had no right to know anything about his health. 

Peter seemed to disagree: 'He's often ill,' the small boy said, looking downcast.

'Yeah, well, but he pulls through alright,' Sirius added, quickly. 

Nobody said anything more after that. Not until Remus returned a little later.

'Was Madam Pomfrey able to help?' Prewett asked. 

Sirius felt - or maybe hoped - that Remus looked a little less unwell.

'She did.'

Not long after Remus sat down again, James stirred.

'Nice of you to join us,' Sirius said as James opened his eyes.

How long had James been asleep? Sirius guessed around twenty minutes, maybe twenty-five. He looked a little disorientated, and Sirius handed him his glasses. Naps were the worst, as far as Sirius was concerned.

'How are you feeling?' Remus asked.

'Alright,' James mumbled, then spotting his Quidditch captain: 'Blimey, Fabian, I didn't see you. How did the match go? Did we win?'

Sirius wasn't looking forward to the moment Prewett would reveal that Gryffindor had lost, but to his surprise, Prewett actually smiled: 'We won,' he said, 'the match, the cup, everything!'

'YES!' James jumped up, pumping his fists in the air. 'I CAN'T BEL-'

'James Potter! What in Merlin's name do you think you're doing boy?!' Madam Pomfrey came racing out from her office, and James quickly sat down on the bed again.

Sirius laughed. Gryffindor had won. James had won. And James was alright. 

A quick scolding by the matron later, James was released and the Gryffindors made their way up to their common room. James chatted happily to Prewett about the match, wanting to hear every detail. Sirius found he was quite interested in hearing more about the match too, and walked next to the pair. Peter and Remus followed the three, talking about whatever those two talked about. Probably the upcoming exams.

'JAMES!' 

As soon as the portrait hole opened, James and Prewett were practically pulled inside by the other Gryffindors and Sirius had a view of Jenny Robins who threw her arms around James and engulfed him in a hug, which most of the team joined. 

'We won!' Robins exclaimed unnecessarily as she and the others let go of James. 

'Jen was bleedin' amazing!' Ciara Ryan grinned.

'How are you feeling Potter?' Tiberius McLaggen asked.

'I've got something for you!' Robins said, as James assured the team he was doing okay. 'Geoff wanted it of course, but I think it's yours.' 

Sirius couldn't see what she gave him, but he'd ask James later.

It was long past midnight when Sirius and James went to bed that evening. The two fifth year prefects, Emmeline Vance and Rufus Scrimgeour (who Frank Longbottom seemed to have put in charge for the evening) managed to convince most students that professor McGonagall might soon turn up if they didn't put a stop to the celebrations. Sirius suspected that had the match been less intense, the celebrations would have gone on despite the prefects best effort, but half of the team had already retired to their dormitories - bruised, exhausted and keen for some peace and quiet. Fabian Prewett had been the first to leave, but then again, as the captain, he was probably the most exhausted. 

Nothing short of the party ending would have stopped Sirius and James. James had been the centre of attention among the first, second and third years. Alise Hugh and Maria Midgen, two girls in the year above them, seemed particularly interested in hearing a detailed breakdown of all the passes between the chasers, as long as it was James who did the talking - although, once or twice, Sirius felt Midgen's eyes on him, though he couldn't for the life of him figure out why.

Safely up in their dormitory, Sirius was just about to ask what Robins had given to James, when James held out his hand. 

'Look at this,' James whispered - presumably not to wake Remus and Peter who had gone to bed earlier. Remus had left the party shortly before Fabian Prewett, his headache still causing him trouble, and Peter had left about an hour before the party broke up.

In James' hand rested a walnut-sized, golden sphere with silver wings.

'What are you supposed to do with that?' Sirius asked.

'Dunno, but it's cool. I think Jenny must have nicked it, after the match.' And she gave it to me, James' eyes plainly told Sirius. 

James laid down on his bed and started playing with the Snitch, letting it fly a few feet before he reached out to capture it. He was good, Sirius thought, and found that it didn't surprise him in the slightest.       

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

The following day, Sirius woke to the news that James had taken Remus to the Hospital Wing, his headache having turned into a fever. This was truly unfortunate as it put a dampener on the otherwise pleasant Sunday atmosphere. 

Not that the Sunday was bad, by any means. The Gryffindors were still elated after a hard-earned victory, James was enjoying the attention he got from their house at meal times, and with exams just around the corner, most people were inside, meaning James and Sirius practically had the entire Hogwarts grounds to themselves. 

Just before dinner, Peter, James and Sirius decided to check if Remus was up for visitors, but Madam Pomfrey sent them away. Sirius suggested half-heartedly to James that they could use the invisibility cloak to see Remus, but he was mostly glad that James declined his idea. If Remus truly was too unwell to receive them, it would only make things worse for him - and this way, James didn't need to tell Peter about the cloak just yet. 

On Monday, however, they learned that Mr Lupin had once more travelled to Hogwarts to see his son. This changed things from unfortunate to - well - worrisome. Madam Pomfrey and professor McGonagall both told them "not to worry", and while Sirius wanted to believe them, he couldn't shake the feeling that they were hiding something - which, being adults, they probably were. 

'Wish there was something we could do to help,' James said for the hundredth time that day. 

It was just after History of Magic, and they had brought their books back to the dormitory before dinner.

Sirius didn't respond. What was the point? There was nothing they could do.

'He'll be alright, won't he?' Peter asked, nervously.

'If Madam Pomfrey is to be believed,' Sirius said. 

James paced the dormitory, looking like a cat trapped indoors on a particularly glorious summer's day. Sirius wanted to kick something, feeling just as restless as James.

'Do you think they're going to make him redo the year?' 

Sirius stared at Peter: 'What in Merlin's name makes you think that?'

'If he's sick for much longer, he might not be able to sit his exams.'

That wasn't a stupid point. Bloody Morgana. 

James stopped dead: 'We could help him revise!' 

'How on earth do you suggest we do that?' Sirius hadn't meant to sound so annoyed - but the situation was frustrating.

'I dunno. Pete, you're the one who revises with him. Is there anything we could do?'

Peter bit his lip. Well, if they were relying on Peter to figure something out, they might as well give up now. Though, Sirius had to admit that the small boy had come through on a couple of occasions.

'He has a sort of revision planner,' Peter said finally, 'it might tell us what he was planning to revise.'

'And what are we supposed to do with that information?' Sirius asked. He didn't like going through people's stuff, even if it was something as insignificant as a revision planner.

Peter shrugged helplessly, but James seemed excited by this piece of news. 

'That's brilliant,' he exclaimed. 'We can make notes for him. Revision notes, I mean. Let's see, we've got two days he's missed - all of Sunday, and this evening, so that gives us half a day of revision each we can try to summarise for him.'

It wasn't a half bad idea, and Sirius certainly didn't have a better one.

'Alright, but Pete, you're the one who is going to find his revision planner, okay?' Sirius agreed. 'You know what it looks like.' And you're the least likely to remember anything else you might see, Sirius thought privately.

If anyone was going to go through Sirius' stuff, he'd rather it was Peter with his poor memory. James would remember everything he saw. But then again, maybe that didn't matter anymore. After all, it was James, and James would never use anything he found against Sirius. But this was Remus' stuff, and Peter seemed like the safest option. 

Peter scurried over to Remus' bed, and opened his school bag.

'Here!' Peter said, holding up a small book triumphantly. 

'This is weird,' Peter continued, as he seemed to have found the right page. Sirius and James came to stand next to him. 

'Look at this, yesterday and today are blanks!'

'You sure you found the right dates?' Sirius asked, leaning over Peter's shoulder.

Peter had found the correct dates, alright. Saturday had been marked down as the final Quidditch match, Sunday was blank - and so was Monday. The following days, however, and all the previous ones, included detailed plans of what subject - and even what topic - Remus had planned to revise.

'It's like he knew he'd be ill,' Peter said. 

Sirius glanced over at James, who looked just as confused as Sirius felt. James' eyes met his. Then, James shook his head.

'Listen, that's really none of our business,' James said, and Sirius felt relieved: it really was none of their business.

'This gives us a head start though,' James continued, 'tomorrow he was planning to revise Potions, which is easy, so let's focus on that this evening.'

With that, they headed to the library and set to work.

'Whoops, sorry,' James said as he knocked over Snivellus' ink bottle as they made to leave the library after a productive, if not a bit boring, evening. 

Evans and Snivellus had already been in the library when they arrived, and James, Sirius and Peter had made sure to grab a table as far away from them as they could, but they had to pass them as they were leaving. Good thing James was always on the look out for a bit of fun.

Snivellus jumped up furiously: 'You did that on purpose, Potter.'

'So what if he did?' Sirius asked, not quite understanding the point Snivellus was trying to make.

James cried out in surprise, and Sirius saw James drop the parchment he'd been carrying, as it had caught fire.

'Whoops, sorry,' Lily said, mimicing James' tone.    

'That was unnecessary, Evans,' Sirius said, trying to sound unaffected. He wasn't sure if he was most annoyed with Evans for burning the notes James had made for Remus, or with James for having not packed them into his bag, where they would have been harder to get at.

'And what you did wasn't unnecessary?' sneered Snivellus.

'Oh Snivellus,' James said, tutting. He grabbed the parchment that Snivellus had been working on, now mostly covered in a sea of blackness, and tapping it once, the paper was clear again, except from the tiny scribbles from earlier.

'As long as you do it soon enough, no harm is done,' James said, knowingly, 'I might have erased a sentence or two, but there was no need to destroy all my notes like that.' 

If Snivellus had been furious before, it was nothing to being outperformed and - worse still - helped, by James.

James and Sirius could barely contain their laughter until they got clear of the library. 

'How did you do that?' Peter asked, curiously, once Sirius and James had collected themselves.

'It's a spell I learned after Remus spilled his ink bottle back in April. It removes any ink that hasn't dried yet. Handy little spell, though I hadn't imagined the first time I'd use it was to help Snivellus.'

'Shame about Remus' notes,' Sirius said, sobering slightly.

James grimaced: 'I'll just make a new set this evening. Who needs sleep anyways?'

Sirius offered to help immediately, not sure what else he was supposed to do with his evening, and Peter, who said he had a slight headache, went to bed not long after James and Sirius had gotten started on re-writing James' notes.

'Well, there's no chance of me forgetting that forgetfulness potion now,' James yawned as he rolled up his and Sirius' work much later that night. 

Sirius glanced over at Evans, who had arrived just before curfew, but unusually for her hadn't rushed upstairs. She sat bent over a copy of One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi looking stressed. Suddenly her emerald eyes looked up, and met his. Eyes widening slightly, she quickly looked down again.

'You should get some rest, Evans, that book is there tomorrow too,' Sirius said as he and James made to go up to the boys dormitories.

'I know that,' she said, sounding exhausted. Then it seemed she realised who she was speaking to: 'Anyways, it's none of your business.'

'If you keep setting our notes on fire because you're too tired to function, it's very much our business,' James said.

'What do you care? I thought you didn't need notes with your oh-so-exceptional memory.'

James opened his mouth to explain why he had needed those notes, but Sirius could see a lost cause when he met one: 'He just likes his own handwriting. You can't deny a boy his pleasures.'

Evans looked like she wasn't sure whether he was joking or not: 'anything else?' she asked coolly.

'Nope, that's all,' Sirius said.

'Night, Evans,' James said and the two left her. 

Tuesday morning brought with it the news that Remus might be able to receive visitors that afternoon. They went to see him after their classes, but decided to leave any talk about revision for another time, instead telling Remus about their Sunday adventures and classes that Tuesday. 

It turned out to be a very good thing they waited with those news. Wednesday afternoon found all four boys in their dormitory, and James had just related what they had done for Remus. 

'You did what?!' 

Remus was rarely angry, but he hadn't taken well to them finding his revision plan.

'We only wanted to help,' Peter said quickly.

Sirius wasn't going to get involved in this one, he decided.

'Come on, Remus, you trust us don't you? We weren't going through your stuff or anything. We just needed to know how to best help you!'

James looked absolutely bewildered at Remus' outburst. 

'That's not okay,' Remus said. He sank down on his bed, shaking with supressed emotions, and probably also exhaustion. 'And James, this is how you break trust. You had no right to ... How can I ever trust you enough to leave anything here after this?'

Not this trust thing again, Sirius thought desperately. But it felt like some unknown power heard his thoughts and decided to spite him. 

'Sirius was right,' Remus muttered. 'You really know how to break trust.'

James looked confused and hurt.

That changed Sirius' resolution to stay out of this. It was Sirius' time to be furious. 

'You -!' Sirius snarled. 'That - I trusted you with that conversation.'

'Maybe you shouldn't have. None of you,' Remus shot back. 

'I trust you,' James stated stubbornly. 'All of you.'

'That's because you've got nothing to trust us with,' Remus said angrily. 'What could we possibly betray about you, James?'

When James didn't say anything, Remus continued: 'You're also a hypocrite, because you don't trust us - not me and Peter. Don't think we're stupid. Sirius and you are up to something, you've got a secret.'

'A secret?' 

'Yeah,' Peter agreed quickly, keen it seemed, to be on Remus' good side, 'after you came back from your grandfather's funeral.'

'The cloak?' James asked confused. 

James moved towards a drawer: 'I got an invisibility cloak from my dad. I can show it to-.'

'It's not about the cloak, James. It's about the fact that you three went through my stuff without my permission.'

'So we won't do that again!' James protested.

'No, you won't,' Remus agreed. 'I am done with you all. It can't work.'

'What can't work?' Sirius wanted to know.

'This - us - being friends,' Remus said. He looked miserable.

'Merlin, Remus, don't you think you're overracting just a little?'

'We've said we're sorry,' James agreed, 'look, I swear I won't do it again. I can make an unbreakable vow if you want me to?'

'Don't you dare being that stupid, James,' Sirius said quickly. 

'James is right, though, we're all sorry, Remus,' Peter added.

'I am sorry too,' Remus said. 

Remus grabbed his school bag, and though he looked like he could really do with some sleep, he marched out, presumably to go to the library.

'So, I really know how to break trust?' James asked Sirius a little later in the common room. Peter had been so devastated by everything that had happened that he had shut himself off from the two. 

'I didn't say that,' Sirius gritted out.

'Of course you didn't,' James said, and his complete trust in Sirius scared Sirius a little, though he couldn't really say why. 

James, however, was still thinking about Remus' words: 'But lets be honest, he's right. I keep messing things up.'

'You have an unnerving lack of understanding of privacy,' Sirius agreed, 'but that's not the same.'

It was what Sirius had come to realise. He didn't need to tell James every little secret, but if it came down to it, he was confident James would go very far to protect them, if he asked. It was just like James to promise unbreakable vows, because it didn't occur to the git that he would ever break them.

'I'd trust you with my life,' Sirius said, knowing he meant it.

'And I'd trust you with mine,' James said eagerly, like he couldn't wait to prove it. 

'Yes, but that counts for shit, as you'd trust anyone with your life.'

'Not Snivellus,' James said.

'Okay, almost everyone. No need to ask about Pete.'

'Of course I'd trust him.' James hesitated for a second before adding, 'his intentions - at least.'

'Maeve?'

James thought about it, but not very long: 'yes,' he said seriously. 'She's a good egg, and she's brave.'

'Evans?'

James frowned: 'I wouldn't trust her with my homework... but...'

'Merlin, you'd actually trust her with your life, wouldn't you?'

'I don't think she'd let me die,' James reflected.

'But if it stood between her life or yours? That's what you've got to ask yourself.'

'She's brave. I'd trust her.'

And this was the problem with James Potter, Sirius decided. James trusted people blindly. Sirius knew from experience that this could only end one way: at some point, James would misplace his trust. After that, James would learn to be more prudent about the whole trust thing, so maybe it wasn't such a big problem, all things considered.

One thing was for sure: Sirius would not be the one to let James down. 

'You've not asked about Remus,' James observed.

'No,' Sirius agreed.

Sirius didn't really like to think about Remus any more. Remus was clearly hurting - but then it was Remus who was doing this to himself. Sirius could understand Remus' anger - Merlin, he'd been furious with James recently enough - but to cut them out completely?

'I'd trust him,' James said firmly. 

'To be fair, you already said you trusted all of us,' Sirius pointed out. 

'You trust him too.'

James had clearly lost it.

'He is hiding something from us! Why else did he get so angry?'

'Yeah, but you already trust him to have a good reason for it,' James pushed. 'I know you.'

And Sirius had to admit that James was right - on both counts.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

For nearly two weeks, James held out hope that Remus would forgive them. But Sunday evening a week before the exams, James was forced to accept that Remus Lupin was no longer interested in being their friend. 

'Who cares,' Sirius said when James voiced his disappointment. 

James suspected Sirius did care. It wasn't a point worth arguing, however. With exams just around the corner, it also meant the summer holiday was approaching, and Sirius was struggling to keep his feelings about the upcoming break in check. James wasn't much happier about it, either. It infuriated James that he could never have both his friends around him, and his family. 

The prospect of watching Sarah play Quidditch over the summer, the promise of his new broom, and more than anything, the idea of seeing his mum and dad again, were all playing on James' mind. So far, the Holyhead Harpies had had a strong start to the season and they were currently second in the standings, though there were only a few points separating the top four teams. He and Sirius had short-listed some suggestions for brooms James could ask his parents to get for him, which James would run by Sarah, and James was eager to show his dad the various duelling spells he had learned. There was no point denying that his summer would - objectively - be fun. 

Yet... Sirius would once more be stuck with his pure-blood obsessed family, and that weighed heavily on James' mind. If there had been an option to stay in school over the summer, James decided he would have taken it and forced his best friend to do the same. But there wasn't.

Two months. Two months of Sirius being miserable. Two months of James not seeing Sirius. It was unbearably long.

'I am taking my cloak with me to classes tomorrow,' James said Monday evening as the two of them were playing gobstones in an empty classroom. 

For all intents and purposes it had been a fun evening. They had taken the gobstone set of Tiffany Ogden, a boring Ravenclaw girl in their year, and as usual they were pretty evenly matched, making the game more exciting than it typically was. 'It's for her own good,' Sirius had argued as she had rushed off, presumably to find a teacher. 'She needs to look after her reputation a bit more. It's not cool this stuff.'

'Go on,' Sirius said now.

'I thought we could use the lunch break to sneak into Madam Maxwell's office.'

'To go through professor Flump's stuff?' 

James had told Sirius about Lily's findings, as well as his own discovery that professor Flump's possessions remained in Madam Maxwell's office. Sirius had seemed to come around to the idea that this issue was worth looking into.

'Exactly!' 

It turned out it was a very good thing indeed that James had brought his cloak. Half-way through the class that Tuesday, an ominous-looking man with a scarred face came into the classroom. Madame Maxwell nodded to the man once, and then continued the class as if nothing had happened. James and Sirius were not the only ones to turn their head from time to time to study the man, who had taken up a position at the back of the classroom, his face half hidden in shadow.

James and Sirius exchanged a quick look as the bell rang for lunch. They hurried out, jumped into an empty classroom, put on the cloak, and rushed into Madame Maxwell's classroom again just before the stranger closed the door. The visit to Madame Maxwell's office would just have to wait.  

'Alastor,' Madame Maxwell said, 'to what do I owe zis pleasure?'

But Madame Maxwell did not look like she was particularly happy to see the stranger. She crossed her arms as she addressed him, and she did not take a seat behind her desk, nor did she invite this Alastor to sit down.

'Can't a man check in on a friend?' the man growled. 

'But of course, zough we are not friends,' Madame Maxwell said.

'True, we're something more. We're family,' the man agreed.

James found this very hard to believe. Aside from the obvious fact that their nationalities were not the same, the two looked nothing like each other.

'We were colleagues,' Madame Maxwell corrected.

'And I was Henry's uncle, that must've counted for something.'

James felt a slight stab in his chest at the mention of the too familiar name.

'Don't you dare -'

'I dare quite a bit, Marie, as you well know. How old would he have been? Sixteen, right? Sitting his O.W.Ls. Straight Os I'd imagine, with a mother and father like his.'

''is father -'

'Was the only man I ever wanted to kill,' Alastor said, his voice lethal. 'I knew my brother to be a petty, twisted sort of man, but I never imagined him capable of murdering his own son.'

'It doesn't matter wat you zought 'im capable of. Frederick and I asked you to keep zis from 'im - to keep 'Enry safe. As far as we were concerned, Frederick was 'Enry's fazer. But no, you 'ad to go and tell 'im. Why I ask you?!'

'If I had the answer to that, I would have told you already,' the man said, sounding, for the first time, weary. 'I am not here to beg your forgiveness - that I will never get, and what use would that be to any of us. I am here on Dawlish' orders. I thought you'd prefer if it was a face you respect, even if you do not like it.'  

'Bold, to assume I respect you.'

James had never seen this side to Madame Maxwell. Her eyes were flashing angrily, her arms continued to stay crossed, yet she was unable to hide a small tremor running down her body.

'But you do. More than Dawlish, at least. And it's her or me.'

'Wat does she want?' 

'What she wants is irrelevant. She needs you. The giants are acting out, there has been an increase in werewolf attacks - even if the papers aren't reporting them - and, well, a couple of dementors have defected from Azkaban. Something, in short, is going on. We know someone is out there, promising more than we can give them. Dumbledore's got a good idea of who it might be too.'

Madame Maxwell finally sat down behind her desk: 'Sounds like a busy time to be an Auror,' she said.

'I welcome busy times,' the man said, 'but this is something else - a war is brewing, if you ask me. If you ask Dumbledore too. We need to get a handle on this before it gets out of hand, or a lot of people are going to die.'

'I am not fit for service, according to Jean Dawlish.'

'According to healers too. Drugs don't go well with our job.'

'Zen, we 'ave a problem.'

'If you're clean enough to work for Dumbledore, you're good enough for us right now. I have a bad feeling about all of this.'

'Don't you always?'

'We need people we can trust.'

'You don't trust anyone anymore, from wat I've 'eard.'

'And why is that, Marie, huh?'

'Zere are ozers who can 'elp.'

'None as good as you and Frederick, and seeming as he's dead -'

'I 'adn't realised,' Madame Maxwell said dryly. 

'This isn't a game, so quit playing,' Alastor growled. 'Unlike most of those bastards back at the office, I get it, so stop making me the enemy. I get that you don't want to go out there when it feels like you have nothing to fight for.'

'I 'ave nozing to fight for!' Madame Maxwell said loudly, her voice breaking. 'Frederick. 'Enry. Gone.'

'Wat about your students?'

'What about zem?'

'Are they not worth fighting for?'

'Zis 'as got nozing to with zem - non, zey are just children.'

'Children who are going to be slaughtered, if we don't get this under control.'

Madame Maxwell said nothing. 

'I saw him, don't think I didn't.'

'Pardon?' Madame Maxwell asked, seemingly taken aback. 

'You know the one, messy black hair, glasses.'

James felt himself startle, and Sirius shifted beside him. For a second, James forgot they were both invisible, as he expected Madame Maxwell to fix her eyes on him, but naturally, she didn't.

'Pottair? I don't know wat you mean,' she said coolly.

'Oh, you do, though. Henry's hair was maybe not so messy - not unless he'd been outdoors exploring, but they don't look that different, do they?'

''Enry's eyes were darker,' Madame Maxwell said dismissively. 

'He reminds you of your son, I know it. I saw how you spoke to him. You can't save Henry. You can't save Frederick. But there are still children you can fight for, husbands you can keep safe, families that don't need to be torn apart.'

'I zink you should leave.' 

Madame Maxwell got up and walked towards the door.

'I've already asked Crouch to expand our recruitment efforts at Hogwarts, get some more candidates, but... I'd rather their services weren't needed by the time they were ready trained. Take a good look at your fifth years and above, because those are the people we're going to end up sending to fight our war if we don't succeed.'

'It was nice of you to stop by.' 

Madame Maxwell held open the door.

'Think about it, Marie,' the man said as he made to leave. 'I am not in the habit of begging, but times change.'

'Alors, times change,' Madame Maxwell agreed. 'And so do people.'

With that, the man left the room, and Madame Maxwell closed the door. James stared at his Defence Against the Dark Arts professor as she sank down in the chair behind her desk. He had always admired her. While his brain was processing all this new information that made him feel very sorry for her, he also felt disappointed. This man clearly believed she was critical to stop whatever was going on, and she seemed to be turning him down. That was not the mark of someone James wanted to admire.

'Are you ever going to stop sulking over Madame Maxwell so we can discuss what we learned?' Sirius grumbled later that evening. 

'I am not sulking,' James said, crossing his arms. 

Sirius looked like he was going to argue, but then he shrugged. 

'Alright, then lets talk what that was all about. Do you think it's true? That there's a war on the horizon?'

'I dunno, do I?' James shrugged. 'The man seemed to think so, didn't he?'

'Alastor Moody,' Sirius said knowingly. 'He's an Auror. Best there is, they say - even my family will begrudgingly admit to that. They like to attribute his talents to his 'pure' blood, while simultaneously judge his allegiance to Dumbledore and say he's really not all that great. But that's not the point. The point is: he's known to be a bit paranoid, so this war thing might just be something he has made up, but -'

'If Dumbledore also believes it to be a possibility,' James agreed.

'Then it might very well be the case,' Sirius nodded. 'Plus, if his own brother murdered his nephew -'

James shuddered involuntarily.

'- well, I can't say I blame the man for being paranoid,' Sirius continued, either not noticing or choosing to ignore James' shudder.

James didn't know what to say to that. He hadn't liked the conversation between Alastor Moody and Madame Maxwell. To learn that Madame Maxwell had once had a son - that the son had been killed by his own father - well, it didn't really bear thinking about. 

James hadn't liked how they had discussed him either. Then, as Sirius was so very keen to discuss, there was this talk of a war. Would countless students be slaughtered? It seemed far-fetched. Yet... wars happened, and if anyone would know about one on the horizon, it would be the Aurors.

'If it's not in the papers, we're not likely to learn about it,' James said finally, wanting to stop his thoughts from spinning aimlessly around in his head.

'Not now,' Sirius agreed, 'but if it gets worse, I bet we will.'

'Let's hope we won't, then,' James said, and he was surprised to find that he was pressing his arms into his stomach. He really, really hadn't liked that conversation. Was he going to be sick? He didn't think so, but he felt unwell.

'At least it's good to know I am not the only one with a messed up family,' Sirius said, and that was the last either of them said on the matter.

'Jimmy, come take a look at this,' Sirius said eagerly.

James moved towards Madame Maxwell's desk, where Sirius had set up a small station, going through various bits of paper from the trunk.

It was late Wednesday evening, and the two had snuck into Madame Maxwell's office. She had looked exhausted that day, and Sirius reasoned that she might not have had a lot of sleep the previous night, making this evening the ideal time to sneak in: It seemed like Madame Maxwell might have wanted an early evening. As long as they were quiet, they should be able to avoid getting caught.

James and Sirius weren't overly worried about getting a detention or two, but getting caught by an ex-Auror on little sleep seemed unnecessarily risky. Then again, no risk, no story. 

'What is that?' James asked as he looked down at the various pieces of parchment Sirius had laid out.

'Lots of hand-drawn maps,' Sirius answered.

'Thanks, mate, I got that much. But of what?'

'The Forbidden Forest I think, odd isn't it? Considering -'

'That professor Flump died in the forest?' James continued eagerly, leaning over to take a closer look.

'I don't think anyone's going to notice if we take these,' Sirius said, 'but just in case...' 

'It'd be better if we didn't have to,' James agreed. 

'This is when we need that brain of yours,' Sirius said, turning his head to look at him. 'How long would you need to study these to be able to copy them later?'

'Not that long,' James said as his eyes swept over the scribbles, the drawings and the countless crosses that filled the hand-made maps. 'Give me your chair, and half an hour?'

Sirius got up quickly: 'I'll see if there's anything else.'

There wasn't.

'My theory,' James said as he was trying to replicate the scribbles from the office, Sirius watching his progress intently, 'is that he was looking for something in the forest.'

James had given this a lot of thought as they were walking back. He hadn't wanted his mind to wander far from the black lines he now tried to copy with red ink. 

'He seems to have covered a lot of the forest,' James observed as he filled in another cross. 'These crosses must mean that he didn't find whatever he was looking for in those locations? Why else go through the bother of drawing up something in the first place - if you're just going to cross it out?'

James looked up in time to see Sirius running a hand through his hair, clearly considering the matter too: 'I've not been thinking about much else since we left Madame Maxwell's office, and I agree. I can't think of it being anything else. But then, it begs the question doesn't it?'

'Did he die in a freak accident, or did he die because he found whatever he was looking for?' James continued for Sirius, meeting his eyes.

'And how on earth does any of this tie in with the missing muggle-borns?' Sirius finished for the both of them.

How indeed, James wondered. But he also knew that until the exams were over - possibly until next term - they were unlikely to find answers to either of these questions.

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Lily couldn't believe it when she learned that she was amongst the absolute best in the year in their end of year exams, only beaten by James Potter and Sirius Black. Severus had also done very well indeed, but Tiffany Ogden had nevertheless been the best performing student outside of Gryffindor house.

'Are you sure the sorting hat didn't get the sorting wrong this year? The top three students were all Gryffindors,' Eloise Rosier mused as she and Lily walked down towards the lake. 'Then again, I can't picture Black and Potter in Ravenclaw, can you?' Eloise continued, a small laugh escaping her. 

Lily giggled despite herself. The idea of Potter and Black causing all sort of chaos in Ravenclaw Tower was rather absurd. Not that she knew anything about the Ravenclaw common room, but she pictured it full of books, with lots of spaces to read and revise, and importantly, an expectation of it being quiet. Yeah, Potter and Black in Ravenclaw would have been a complete catastrophe.

Maybe she should have asked the sorting hat to have put her in Ravenclaw? But then she wouldn't have had Mary and Maeve. Or would she? Eloise certainly wasn't in Gryffindor and they were, despite Severus' assertions to the contrary, friends. 

'You were the best girl, though, that's what today is about,' Eloise said, as she gestured towards the edge of the lake, were Lily spotted a group of girls.

Maeve Ryan, Mary Macdonald and Georgiana Selwyn were all seated on a blanket. Lily stopped dead. Never before had she seen all her girlfriends in one place - together - smiling and talking. 

'Oi, hurry up you two,' Mary shouted as she spotted Eloise and Lily.

'C'mon, we can't very well start our celebrations without the guest of honour, can we?' Eloise said, and nudged Lily forward.

This was for her? Lily couldn't believe it. 

'Surprise!' Mary said as she jumped up and hugged Lily, stumbling slightly as she did so. 

'What's all this?' Lily asked, feeling like she had to say something with them all looking at her.

'It's a celebration, of course!' Eloise said.

'Aye, we've got the best lass in the year, so we better have the best end-of-year picnic to celebrate her.'

'There's no doubt you deserved it, working as hard as you did,' Mary said. 

Maeve grinned: 'Sure, I might also be celebratin' the chance to finally feel a bit more relaxed in our dorm again. Who knows, maybe I'll even be allowed a laugh or two.' 

'You two had an easy escape,' Mary agreed, addressing Georgiana and Eloise.

Lily scoffed, trying to pretend to be offended when all she wanted to do was to throw her arms around them all.

'To Lily then,' Georgiana said as Lily was handed a glass of pumpkin juice - they all raised their glass, and Lily felt her cheeks burn. Despite her slight mortification, she couldn't help but feel her lips stretch into a wide smile.

'Thank you, girls. You're the best.'

'Nah, Lily, you’ve just gone and proven to us that you’re the best,' Maeve grinned. 

'The best girl, the best muggle-born, simply the best,' Eloise agreed.

'Now everyone will realise how special you are,' Severus beamed at her. 'You beat everyone.'  

'Well, not everyone,' Lily said fairly, 'Potter and Black -'

Severus flinched as if merely saying their names would alert the boys to their presence.

'Oh relax, will you?' Lily said, waiving a hand, 'they hardly sat a foot inside this library this last month - not if they could help it. We're unlikely to find them here now.'

Because that was exactly where Lily and Severus were. A week after the exams and they were still in the library. Not to study. Though neither would admit as much, they were hiding from all the other Slytherins and Gryffindors. All things considered, however, the library was a very pleasant place to be now the exams were over. 

Severus and Lily were not the only ones there, but there weren't many students around. The whole atmosphere was one of relaxed curiosity; so different from the frantic turning of pages and scratching of quills on parchment from a few weeks prior.

'I am sure they cheated,' Severus muttered.

'I don't think so,' Lily admitted reluctantly. 'They are annoying as anything, but they're really talented.'

'Why are you being nice about them?' Severus asked. He looked distinctly annoyed, and Lily regretted bringing Potter and Black up in the first place.

'I am not being nice about them. They are arrogant berks who deserve to resit the year. But the reality is -'

Severus' eyes narrowed, and Lily decided it wasn't worth the argument: 'oh never mind. How's life in the Slytherin common room now that the exams are over? It's been non-stop celebrations in the Gryffindor common room for a week now.'

'It's alright,' Severus said, shrugging. Lily always found him strangely reluctant to share anything about his time with the Slytherins. But then again, he had rarely shared much about his life before they went to Hogwarts either. 

Suddenly an uncomfortable thought struck her: 'But you like it there, right?' she asked anxiously.

'Oh yes,' Severus said, nodding, but for the first time she had known him, Lily couldn't work out if he was sincere in his reply to her.

'Where are Avery and Mulciber?' Lily asked. She wanted to ask if Avery and Mulciber were really his friends, but the question seemed exceedingly rude. 

'I don't know,' Severus said dismissively. 'Do you know where your friends are right now? Ryan and the other one?'

Lily wanted to take comfort from the fact that Severus had immediately turned the question around to be about her friends, which would suggest that yes, he did consider Avery and Mulciber friends. "I don't know where my friends are, do you know where yours are, maybe?" 

Except, even Lily referred to Avery and Mulciber as Severus' friends frequently, though she wasn't sure she really meant it the way she felt Mary and Maeve were her friends. In fact, she often put a lot of hostility behind the word "friends" when it was applied to Avery and Mulciber. They weren't really the sort of friends Lily had hoped Severus would have made. But now, Lily worried too much that Severus considered himself an outsider to the two boys - to all the boys in the Slytherin house - to be overly picky about who Avery and Mulciber were. 

And you don't feel like an outsider? A very unwelcome voice asked. Maybe she did, a bit. But the image of the girls preparing the picnic for her floated back to her mind - they wouldn't have done that if they didn't consider her their friend, would they?

'Are you planning to see them this summer?' Lily asked instead.

'No,' Severus said, and his eyes darkened. Of course, the summer holidays must be weighing heavily on Severus.

'Oh Sev,' Lily said, leaning forward and taking his arm. 'Why don't you just come over to mine for most of the summer? I am going away for a couple of weeks to see Maeve and Mary, but the rest of the time? Can your parents really mind all that much if you camp out at my place? You won't be far away...'

Lily already knew the answer. But she had to offer something.

Severus said nothing, he just looked down at her hand resting on top of his. Lily decided she was being unfair. She shouldn't offer something he probably wanted, but was unable to accept.

'Well, I can't wait to check out all of our old spots, can you?'

You won't be alone, she was trying to say. We will have a good summer, you and I. 

Severus met her eyes, and while he was unable to hide the misery, she saw a glimmer of light in the black eyes. Nobody would stop them, Lily promised herself. Severus' summer was going to be as good as she could possibly make it. And the rest - the parts she couldn't control? Severus would survive, because he was the strongest person she knew. 

'You come of age at 17 in the wizarding world, right?' 

'Yes,' Severus said, suddenly looking puzzled.

'Then, as soon as we're both 17, we'll rent a place together.'

'Don't be stupid, we don't have any money,' Severus said, his eyes round and his hand twitching under hers. He hadn't outright rejected her idea, Lily noticed, just the practicalities. That was promising.

'I'll start saving now,' Lily promised. 'I am sure I can find some way to earn a bit of money from mum and dad.'

'It won't do.'

'It will do!' Lily insisted, a bit too loudly for the library. 'Sev, we'll find the money. You trust me, don't you?'

'Do you ... will you ... promise?' 

Severus' voice was smaller than she was used to, unsure, frail. Lily lifted her hand and stuck out her little finger. 

'Pinky promise!'

'Evans, over here.'

Lily had just entered the Gryffindor common room to find Mary and Maeve before dinner. James Potter was waving her eagerly over to where Sirius Black and he were sitting. 

'Er... everything okay?' Lily asked as she walked over. The two of them were rarely anything but trouble, so she scanned the area to try to get a view of any traps she might be walking into. Then again, Potter and Black liked an audience, and most people were either at dinner or outside.

'Well, aside from Potter's heartache?' Lily added when she had assessed the situation as free of any obvious traps. 'Give it time, Potter. One day you'll look back at Madame Maxwell and appreciate the time you had together.'

Potter rolled his eyes, and Black smirked at his friend as he said: 'James'll be alright. Eventually. It's a tough blow to recover from, though: the love of his life choosing her old career over him.'

Madame Maxwell had announced that she would re-join the Auror office after the end of term. Lily, like the rest of the class, found this to be devastating news, as she'd been one of Lily's favourite teachers. However, also like the rest of the class, Lily had taken to teasing Potter about it.  

'Hilarious, both of you,' Potter grumbled. In truth, he had been one of the few to look less upset about their Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher's news. 

'So what is it?' Lily asked, wondering why on earth she'd been called over.

'No need to look so worried, Evans,' Black said.

'No, we just wanted to update you on the whole professor Flump business,' Potter agreed, indicating she should take an armchair next to him.

'You know what happened to the muggle-borns?' Lily asked, feeling oddly nervous. She remained standing.

Potter and Black exchanged a quick look.

'No, although our current theory is that - er - well,' Potter looked around, probably to check that no one was listening. 

'Listen,' Black interrupted his friend, 'it's a bit of a story. Sit down, won't you?'

Crossing her arms, Lily took a seat.

'We might have been able to go through some of professor Flumps belongings,' Potter said.

Lily opened her mouth to ask how. Deciding she didn't really want to know, she closed it again.

'We found that he's been making maps of the Forbidden Forest,' Black continued, once he was sure she wasn't about to interrupt them.

'The Forbidden Forest?'

'Yes, we know, right? Pretty mysterious considering it was where professor Flump died,' Potter said dramatically. 'But we don't believe the nonsense from Lovegood's that professor Flump had been bringing muggle-borns into the forest to perform dark rituals,' Potter added quickly.

'No,' agreed Black, 'but there were a lot of crossed out areas on the maps he'd made.'

'We think he might have been looking for something,' Potter added. 'Maybe a treasure?'

Lily noticed that Potter looked excited at this idea.

'Or,' Black said lowering his voice, 'he could have been looking for the bodies of the missing muggle-borns.'

'We think those are the two most likely options,' Potter continued. 

'Mind you, we have no evidence that the missing muggle-borns ever went near that forest,' Black said thoughtfully.

Lily was trying to process all of this. They were looking at her as if they expected her input. Buying herself some time she asked: 'where are the maps now?'

'We've got copies,' Potter said. 

'We just didn't want to take them out before we knew you wouldn't set fire to them,' Black said raising his eyebrows at her.

Potter bent over and picked up a few scrolls of parchment from his bag. 

'Do you think it's possible he was looking for locations to perform dark rituals?' Lily asked after having studied the maps for a bit.

'We think it's a good working hypothesis to ignore most of what Lovegood has written,' Black said.

'If professor Flump had been looking for such a location before taking the muggle-borns, we should have seen at least one area that professor Flump had identified as appropriate, right?' James explained. 'But we can't find a circled out area or a tick or a single note to suggest he found any such location.'

'Our guess is that whatever he was looking for, he found the day he was killed,' Black said leaning back in his armchair. 

'Why else would he have died?' James agreed.

'It could just have been rotten luck, of course,' Sirius added, 'but it's the best idea we've got.'

'Where does that leave us?' Lily asked.

'With some homework,' Black said without hesitation.

'He's been working his way left to right through the forest, so we're hoping that if we go into this area,' Potter indicated an area of the map that was free from crosses, 'we should be covering the area that he probably visited the day he died.'

'Assuming he didn't change up his pattern for some reason,' Black agreed.

'You're not actually planning to go into the Forbidden Forest?' 

Potter and Black exchanged another look: ''Course we are,' Potter said. 

'But surely,' Lily tried to reason with them, 'the professors would have seen whatever there was to find when they located his body.'

'If only we had considered that,' Black said, looking bored. 

'But-'

'You're assuming that he was found where he was killed,' Potter said, looking supremely full of himself. 'But he was not. His body was picked up by some spiders. It was Hagrid that found him - or what remained of him - in a nest of sorts.' 

'But they insist - or so Hagrid says - that he was already dead,' Sirius finished for James. 

Lily was barely aware of biting her lip. She had to admit that they had done their job thoroughly.

'So when are we going?' Lily asked, making up her mind.

'Excuse me?' Black asked, sitting up straighter.

'When are we going into the Forbidden Forest?' Lily asked. Did Potter and Black really think she was going to sit this one out?

'We are not -'

'First weekend back,' Potter interrupted Black. 'So you're in?'

'Naturally,' Lily said, getting up from the chair. 'You won't stand a chance in the forest without me.' 

She knew that to be a lie, but as Potter and Black exchanged looks that were meant to portray the deepest scepticism, she couldn't help but see a sliver of admiration, too.    

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

Remus Lupin was no longer the eleven year old boy that had turned up at Hogwarts, striking up a conversation with a shy boy and hoping, despite himself, that he might be able to make a friend. Now Remus knew better. Friends were a luxury someone like him could not afford. 

Friends were fun, they could even be helpful at times, but they were also nosy. In the end, friends were dangerous, because they made you believe it was okay to let your guard down. 

One thing friends did, that Remus now missed, was make you feel less lonely. Of course, Remus would to some extent always be alone. Alone in his secret. Alone in his struggles. Alone in not being human. Now, however, he was alone in a way that was painfully obvious to people - except nobody really seemed to notice.

Herein lay the power of being friendless. If nobody could see him, then nobody could find out his secret. In short, if nobody cared about him, he would be safe.

Being almost invisible did not stop Remus from observing others. It was hard to miss how the fallout between him and the other boys affected Peter Pettigrew in particular. Small, clumsy Pete, who tagged along with James and Sirius, but often cast his gaze towards Remus as if he was hoping Remus would change his mind. Peter, who Remus would still find alone in the dormitory from time to time, as James and Sirius were out doing God knew what. Peter, who had suddenly also become more lonely, but who hadn't chosen it the way Remus had. 

For reasons of practicality, Remus shared a compartment with the three other boys as they journeyed across the country-side towards London. It was a miserable journey for all involved. James and Sirius were sitting with barely an inch between them, alternating between trying to be loud and carefree, and being lost for words, looking out the window, James shifting nervously, Sirius looking unusually haughty.

Peter was sitting opposite Remus, removed from the two best friends. He sat quietly, reading a comic that had recently been released (and, as far as Remus could understand, had gained some popularity). But whatever the adventures of Martin Miggs, the Mad Muggle was, it wasn't something that seemed to have caught Peter's attention much, as he barely turned the pages, his eyes resting on each picture far too long.

'You'll come and stay for a bit this summer, won't you Pete?' Remus heard James call to Peter as James left with his parents, Sirius having left with his cousin Narcissa Black already. James didn't even give Peter time to respond, and Remus noticed that the question, far from making Peter look happy to be included, made Peter's shoulders slump a bit further. 

'Remus, my darling!' 

Remus turned to see his own parents rushing towards him. After weeks of not talking much to anyone, it was all Remus could do to hold back his tears as his mother and father took it in turn to engulf him into warm, welcoming, loving, hugs.

It was going to be alright. Remus was going to be home with people who loved him for precisely who he was. Two months of no secrets. 

Just as they were leaving, Remus spotted Peter, who still stood alone. Remus stopped. Something was very wrong indeed. 

Peter's pale face was looking left and right, scanning his surroundings, and Remus could tell that Peter could not see his mother. As the crowd of people was thinning, Remus was confident the only reason Peter couldn't see his mother was because she was nowhere to be seen. 

'Wait, mum, dad... I, er, let me introduce you to Peter. He's a Gryffindor in my year.' 

Hope and Lyall exchanged a curious look, but they let Remus steer them towards the small boy.

'Hi, Pete,' Remus said, feeling awkward, and wondering what had compelled him to run such a risk. Hope Lupin's health had been Remus' excuse to go home on so many occasions and now she stood there in front of Peter, perfectly healthy.

'I wanted to introduce you to mum and dad. Mum, dad, this is Peter.' 

'It's lovely to meet you Peter. We've heard lots about you from Remus.'

Hope Lupin was, as usual, nothing but warmth and kindness as she addressed Peter. Remus had forgotten that until recently, he had indeed written to his parents about his friends. His former friends, Remus amended quickly.

Peter looked bewildered, and who could blame him. For weeks, Remus had refused to speak to the boys more than necessary and here he was introducing Peter to his parents.

'Where are your parents, young man?' Lyall asked, and Remus wanted to correct his father immediately. Mother. Not parents. 

'I think mum might be late,' Peter mumbled; his eyes scanning the station once more.

'We'll wait, won't we?' Remus asked, not wanting Peter to be alone. Peter, who was born at the beginning of August, was not only short, he was also still only eleven years old. He was the last person Remus wanted to leave alone in London.

'Of course we will,' Lyall said.

'We're not in any hurry, my dear,' Hope reassured Peter, who looked like he was about to protest.

'O-okay,' Peter stammered. 'Thank you.'

'She might not come,' Peter whispered a little later, 'I am sorry. I am wasting your time.'

Remus felt sick, and as the full moon had been about a week ago, he knew it had nothing to do with his condition. Peter's mother couldn't have forgotten him. Or could she have? No, she hadn't seen Peter in half a year. No mother forgot their son. 

No explanation Remus could come up with made any sense.

Lyall glanced at his watch. 'Listen, Peter, why don't you come home with us, and then we'll Floo your mother. That is assuming she is magic?'

'She is,' Remus said quickly, relieved that they weren't just going to leave Peter there. 

Peter looked at him uncertainly, and Remus realised Peter was waiting for Remus' permission to accept. 

'I think that's a good idea,' Remus said, trying to smile to Peter.

It was hard work, smiling. What he wanted to do was to shout, loudly, at Peter's mother. This surprised Remus, as shouting at people wasn't what he normally wanted to do.

'Can Pete stay for dinner?' Remus asked in the car as they neared the small village his parents had moved to just before Remus started at Hogwarts. 

Remus hadn't been able to block out the sound of Peter's stomach rumbling for the last 30 minutes, and in any case, if Peter's mother could forget to pick up her son, she could forget that he would need dinner.

'Dinner, huh,' Lyall said from the passenger seat, looking back at Remus and lifting an eyebrow. 'Did you hear that, love? Dinner indeed.'

'Tea,' Remus amended, feeling his cheeks burn. 

Lyall and Hope laughed: 'Of course Peter can stay for dinner, my dear, and don't let your father bully you.'

'Dinner,' Lyall repeated shaking his head, 'oh Remus, you're becoming a real Hogwarts student now.'

Noticing perhaps something in Remus' expression, Lyall added quickly: 'don't be ashamed, son. You're becoming your own person, and that is something to be proud of.'

His parents had an odd way of turning anything Remus said or did into something they felt he should be proud of. Remus mentally rolled his eyes, but felt himself relax nonetheless.

'I suggest we Floo your mother first thing, Peter, and letting her know you're planning to stay for tea, so that she doesn't get too worried,' Lyall continued.

Would Peter's mum be worried, Remus wondered.

As they pulled into the driveway, Remus saw a middle-aged woman cross the road and approach their house.

'Hope, Lyall, I was hoping you'd return soon. Here, I brought you this,' the woman said, holding out a round container of sorts. 'Thought some pudding might be a nice treat for the family now that young Remus is back. Ah, this is him, is it?'

Remus felt distinctly uncomfortable as the woman's eyes landed on him. It had always been important that he didn't draw too much attention to himself lest his family would be forced to relocate quickly. Neighbours always got suspicious, but the less they knew about Remus, the longer it usually took. 

To his surprise, Hope beamed: 'Indeed it is, Remus, this is Sandra Podmore. Sandra, this here is Remus and this is Remus' friend Peter, who is staying for tea.'

The two boys introduced themselves in turn.

'So you're back for the school holidays, eh Remus?' Ms Podmore beamed at him. 'I say, what would I give to be eleven again and experience Hogwarts all over.'

'You're a -'

'Witch, yes,' the woman nodded. 'My friend, Louise, however, is a muggle, but she knows about magic, naturally. After fourteen years of living together she'd have to be extremely dim not to have noticed anything, ha!' The woman let out a laugh of sorts, before continuing: 'Mind, there aren't many of us 'round. Most here are muggles, so it's good to be cautious boy. It's only us and the McKinnons. They are a muggle-born couple, so I suspect they like to stay in a mostly muggle village.'

'Thank you so much for the pudding,' Remus' mother said, taking the cake, making to follow Lyall, who had already entered the small house.

'What d'you think Hope, d'you think Marlene and Matthew will want little Mary to go to muggle school? Seems likely, doesn't it? Mind you, you chose to home-school Remus, didn't you?' 

'We did,' Hope agreed pleasantly.

'You're in Gryffindor, I hear?'

Remus was astonished that this woman knew so much about them - about him. Moreover, despite her thirst for gossip, Hope seemed perfectly relaxed around Ms Podmore - except perhaps showing traces of wanting to go in and get the dinner going.

'Yes,' Remus said, cautiously.

'The best house,' Ms Podmore winked at him. 'And your friend too? Good, good. I was a Gryffindor myself back in the day, and I have a nephew who's in Gryffindor at the moment: Sturgis. No, you don't know him? Well, that's understandable, he'll be a few years over you and I dare say that makes a big difference when you're your age. Never you mind.'

'It was good of you to stop by Sandra,' Hope said.

'Indeed, I had to, hadn't I?' Ms Podmore beamed down at Remus, 'I had to see young Remus for myself. Well, well, you'll want to get on. I'll see you on Tuesday, eh?'

Once Hope had assured Ms Podmore that she would see her on Tuesday, they were finally free to get indoors.

'Finally got rid of Sandra?' Lyall asked as he came into the hallway. 

'She's a dear, really,' Hope said immediately. 

'She is, but she does not know when to finish a conversation. I am surprised you escaped so easily.'

'It was kind of her to make us some pudding,' Hope said, refusing, as usual, to speak ill of anyone. 

'Indeed it was,' Lyall agreed, kissing Hope on the cheek and taking the cake from her. 'Peter, I've Flooed your mother. She... er... well, in any case... she's expecting you over after tea.'

Remus tried to read his father's expression. It looked like Peter's mother might indeed have forgotten about Peter - otherwise, Lyall would surely have related the reason why she hadn't come for him. 

'Why don't you show Peter your bedroom, Remus-dear? Tea should be ready soon, assuming -'

'I'll help,' Lyall promised his wife. 'I think we can all agree my cooking has a magic touch to it.'

With that terrible joke, Remus and Peter left Remus' parents.

'This is nice,' Peter said quietly as he saw Remus' room. 

It was nice. 

Nicer than Remus remembered it. It took a moment before Remus realised his parents had replaced his old wardrobe, bed and bedside table, and they had bought him a desk and a small bookshelf. Remus had known that Lyall had been able to resume his old job now that Remus was back at school, but the idea that his parents could afford to buy him all this, especially as Remus was only around in the holidays, surprised him. 

'Thanks,' Remus said, feeling numb.

Remus very much wished Peter wasn't there, so he could go downstairs and ask his parents about a thousand questions. Questions he didn't want to ask in the presence of anyone else, least of all a fellow student.

Peter hovered uncertainly on the threshold to the bedroom, and suddenly Remus felt very guilty. Of course Peter shouldn't be there. Peter should be at home, with a mother who had remembered that today her son finished school for the summer. Remus' questions could wait. Right now, Peter needed him - needed a friend.

'It's safe, y'know. The floor isn't going to eat you up,' Remus said, indicating that Peter should take a seat on his bed.

'I am sorry about all this, Remus,' Peter said quickly. 'I know you don't want anything to do with us, and now -'

Peter looked on the verge of tears. Remus took a seat next to Peter.

'No, I am sorry,' Remus said, interrupting Peter. 'We were meant to be best friends, and I forgot about that. Can you forgive me?'

Remus knew he went against everything he had recently promised himself, but this wasn't fair on Peter. It was bad enough that being a werewolf ruined his own life, Remus wasn't prepared to see Peter suffer so much from this. Not when he had enough to deal with. Not when Peter had lost his father, was forgotten by his mother and forced to be a third wheel in a friendship between Sirius and James.

Peter nodded, a single tear rolling down his cheek: 'does that mean we're friends again?'

'Do you promise not to go through my stuff?' Remus asked.

Peter nodded once more, vigorously this time. 

'Then yes, we're friends again,' Remus promised. 'Best friends.'   

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'What's happening on Tuesday?' Remus asked his mother Sunday early afternoon as the three of them were sitting in the small garden with a mug of tea each and a plate of home-made biscuits.

'Nothing is happening on Tuesday, dearest,' Hope said, frowning ever so slightly.

'But Ms Podmore said she'd see you on Tuesday.'

Hope laughed lightly: 'oh that, that hardly counts as something happening.'

'Your mother and some of the other residents in the neighbourhood have their own little wine club. Once a month - at the start of the week, for some ridiculous reason. Don't let their innocent faces fool you Remus, they can get through more wine in an evening than I want to see cross your lips in your lifetime.'

'I am not sure I'll drink,' Remus said, 'it doesn't taste very nice.' 

He was too young to drink, naturally, but he had been permitted a sip of his mother's wine a year ago, and decided he never wanted to be allowed that particular experience again.

'You will,' Hope said, 'when you're older. But your father is partially right, it's important to drink responsibly. Where he is wrong,' here his mother threw his father a pointed look, 'is his suggestion that we don't drink responsibly. As for it being during the week, nobody other than Lyall seems to take issue with it.'

'That you know of,' Lyall argued fairly, 'who knows, I might not even be the worst complainer out there.'

Taking another sip of tea, Lyall turned to Remus: 'Tuesday evening, when "nothing" is happening, it's just going to be you and me. We'll all have dinner when I come home from work, and then your mother will leave us for her much cooler friends.'

The look Lyall Lupin threw his wife, one intended to be full of disapproval, betrayed instead how happy his father was in that moment. Hope scoffed, but her eyes were beaming with joy too. Remus watched his parents, more relaxed than he could ever remember them.

Remus' parents were content, at peace, full of life. He had no trouble guessing the last time it might have been like this. With Remus gone at school, life was settling down to the blissful reality it always should have been - the way it had been, before... 

It's my fault, Remus realised. Without me, they are so happy.

In the first week Remus was home, he busied himself writing to Peter, trying to find out how he was doing. While Peter replied faithfully to his letters, they were awfully vague about Peter's day-to-day life. Worried that Peter was having a terrible summer, Remus ended up inviting Peter over for a few days the following week, and the boys spent a few - normal - days together.

The two of them played gobstones, wizards chess, walked around in the village, and even went flying (taking turns on Peter's broom) in a secluded spot Ms Podmore showed an eager Peter. Remus had to admit that flying was rather fun - especially when one wasn't flying on a school broom - and it was nice to be outside in the breezy summer's day, for then to come home and find that Hope had made some refreshing lemonade for them both.  

Once the weekend rolled around however, Peter left, and Remus went back to spending time with his parents - but also, on his own. Lyall and Hope had their own lives now. Hope visited friends, volunteered at the church and helped an elderly neighbour with his grocery shopping twice a week. Lyall seemed to have poured his heart back into his work, frequently being late home for dinner, and sometimes spending a night away when work demanded that he travelled somewhere. 

'But nothing beats a good Sunday tea with my two favourite people,' Lyall said raising his glass.

'I don't know, my love, are you telling me you prefer to spend time with your wife and son over that ghastly poltergeist in Hull?' Hope raised her eyebrows.

'The poltergeist would have been my preferred choice, but Hull my dear...'

'He makes a fair point,' Remus said, 'I don't think you nor I could have disappeared completely for almost 100 years only to suddenly appear again.'

'I should hope not,' Lyall said. 'It's a fascinating case though. It appears like the Poltergeist must be very attached to the house he haunted all those years ago, otherwise why is he back now? Of course the muggles are puzzled. They can't sell a single piece of furniture without him stealing it and putting it back. All the equipment they intended to use on the house keeps disappearing. But it's not like he's been in the house for the last 100 years, so why does it matter if some muggles are finally doing a bit of restoration? It's all very mysterious. I am afraid I might have to leave you two for a couple of nights next week.'

'That's quite alright dear, go and solve your little mystery,' Hope said, smiling, 'I am sure Remus and I will manage.'

'I am never worried you and Remus won't manage,' Lyall said, 'it is me who will have to manage two whole evenings without you.'

'Then,' Hope said, getting up from the table, 'that will be two days you won't be able to work on the greatest mystery of them all. Pudding, dearest?'

The last part was directed at Remus, who nodded: 'yes, please.'

'I don't need to ask you if you want pudding,' Hope said, kissing Lyall as she passed him. 

'Well, what is the greatest mystery of them all, my love?' Lyall asked as Hope returned with some spotted dick.  

'Why I love you, of course,' Hope said, winking at Remus as she handed him a plate.

'Oh I know that,' Lyall said confidently. 'We wizards have love potions.'

Lyall turned to Remus: 'You must have noticed by now that your mother is far superior to me. She is gorgeous-looking, fiercely intelligent, brilliantly funny and she has the biggest heart there is.'

Remus decided he wanted to finish eating his pudding quickly so he could leave his parents to whatever was going on.

His parents must have picked up on some of his feelings, because the following day, Lyall knocked on Remus' bedroom door in the evening. 

'Remus, son, I want you to know that tomorrow will be the last bit of travelling I do until the week after the full moon. Your mother and I know that we cannot understand what you go through, nor remove the burden of that curse, but as long as we are able to, we will stay by your side, from the first aches until the moon - well, you know.'

But that wasn't really the issue. Remus knew his parents would do everything they could to make his transformations easier. 

The problem was how visibly content they were. It wasn't that Remus didn't want his parents to be happy, nor did he prefer them to be thin with worry like they had been. No, the trouble was that Remus' darkest suspicions seemed to have been right: his parents were infinitely more happy without him.    

'Thanks dad,' Remus said, not knowing what else to say.

'I will miss you,' Lyall said, 'it seems silly to go away when I finally have you home, but this case...'

'I can't wait for you to tell us all about it,' Remus said, forcing a smile.

There was a knock at the window, and Remus recognised Duchess.

'Oh, that's my cue to leave,' Lyall said. 'Sleep well, son.'

Remus went to the window to let Duchess in. He had an idea of why James might have been writing to him, and sure enough, Remus quickly found that he was right.

Remus,

I hope your summer holiday has gotten off to a good start (better than Sirius, in any case!). Peter wrote to me telling me you two have made up - that's great. 

Indeed, Remus had expected as much. Peter had asked whether it was something he needed to keep secret, especially as James would likely write to Peter in the days he was with Remus, and Remus decided that there were enough secrets in the world already. Remus therefore felt no resentment or disappointment in learning that Peter had told James, although he already knew what would come next.

I hope that means you're ready to forgive Sirius and me too. I talked to mum and dad about it, and they agreed that what we did was not okay. I think Sirius never wanted to go through your stuff to begin with. We just didn't see any other way of helping you. 

You see Peter suggested you might end up re-sitting the year if you did poorly in your exams because you'd been away so much (although I now know we needn't have worried - well done on your exams, by the way), and we really didn't want you to lose you to the new first years.  Mum and dad reckon you might forgive us, because we have sworn not to do it again, and because our intentions weren't bad. Will you?

Would he? Remus wasn't sure. He read on, deciding to deal with the question later.

The summer here has been great fun. I've been watching Sarah play a lot of Quidditch with my cousin Carl. The Holyhead Harpies are doing really well this year, although they lost the last match we watched. It wasn't too bad, they only lost by 40 points at 210 to 250. It was really unlucky, as The Holyhead Harpies were the better team of the two, but then the seeker really messed up. Still, Sarah wasn't happy she had let in ten goals (especially against the Chudley Cannons), but that's Quidditch: every day can't be your day. 

I've finally settled on a new broom, a Nimbus 1300, which isn't out until August, but which Sarah reckons is the best broom. I can't wait to try it, but my old Nimbus 1000 isn't too bad. I thought I might bring both to Hogwarts, and then we've got two good racing brooms. If it's against the rules we can pretend it's your broom. I assume you don't have a broom? Peter has got a Cleansweep Six, which isn't a bad broom, but it's not quite in the league of the Nimbus series.

Hope to hear from you soon! It would be grand to have you over this summer!

James

PS: Duchess and I have figured a way to get letters to Sirius so if you want to write to him, just use her. I'll send her over from time to time if you're interested. I know Peter has used her for this.

PPS: Sirius really isn't having a good time with his family, so I think you should send him something (if you've forgiven us).

'I thought you might be in bed already, my darling.'

Remus looked up. He'd been sitting at his desk with Duchess for company staring at James' letter for he-didn't-know-how-long. 

Hope was standing in the doorway.

'A letter from a friend?' his mother asked as she entered the room and sat down on his bed.

'James,' Remus said, not sure what James - or Sirius - were at that moment.

'James Potter, right?' Hope asked eagerly, 'he's the one who likes... that sport.'

'Quidditch,' Remus said, 'yeah, that's right.'

'We've not seen him this summer, or... Sirius?'

'Sirius has a... complicated home situation,' Remus explained, thinking quietly that if Sirius' parents had anything to say about it Sirius would never speak a word to Hope Lupin. Suddenly fighting an urge to smile, Remus realised that Sirius on the other hand would do anything to speak to someone like Hope.

'James is busy,' Remus continued. 

'Not more busy than having time to write you a letter,' his mother observed.

'He's invited me to stay over the summer,' Remus confessed.

'How lovely, you must go!'

'I... don't think that's a very good idea,' Remus said more to his hands than his mother, knowing that she too would contain her excitement once she remembered why Remus shouldn't go around visiting wizards.

'Whyever not?'

'Mum, you know why I shouldn't - why I have to be careful.'

'We need to find a time that works for you,' Hope agreed, 'but that's no reason not to see your friends over the summer.'

'They are not my friends,' Remus gritted out, looking up at his mother again. 'Something happened, alright?' 

'What happened, my darling?'

So Remus told her all about the stupid revision planner he had used, and how Peter, James and Sirius had gone through it. 

Hope furrowed her eyebrows: 'Unless you write down that you transform during the full moon - which I know you don't - I fail to see what was so bad. They only meant to help.'

'I could have written it down,' Remus explained, trying to remain patient. He hadn't expected this from his mother. 'Okay, well, I wouldn't have written that down, but if they go sneaking around, they might find out something. What if I slip up?'

'You won't slip up.'

'How can you say that?!' Remus asked angrily, pushing himself off the chair. 

His mother was meant to understand. She was meant to be one of the two people in the world to understand why Remus couldn't have friends.

'One mistake is all it takes, and then they might tell their parents and I might get thrown out of Hogwarts! Why do you think Dumbledore has put in place all these security measures? I thought you knew! I thought dad had taught you better! I AM A MONSTER IN MY WORLD!... There's no space for people like me at school.' 

The last sentence came out as a sob as his anger drained away, losing ground to the constant fear Remus carried with him. 

'Remus, darling, come here. It's okay.' 

His mother stood up and put her arms around him. Remus let himself cry into Hope's chest, her warm body engulfing his.

'I know this is a lot to carry, and I know you're scared. Being scared is probably a good thing, under the circumstances, it means you're careful, but I understand that no child should have to live like you do.'

She was stroking his back by now, talking quietly into his ears. Remus found himself calming down. He let go, and sat down on the bed. Hope sat down next to him and continued running a hand across his back. 

'Going to school carries risks. It was always going to carry risk. That was why your father and I were so reluctant to have you go to Hogwarts in the first place. As it happens, we have every confidence in Dumbledore's security measures.'

'So do I, but having friends is just too risky,' Remus said quickly.

'I have often found that friends are more blind to our faults than an objective observer.'

'This isn't some stupid fault!'

'No,' Hope agreed, 'but it's something that people would never expect their friends to be. I might know very little about your world, my love, but I know a lot about friendship. Nothing you have told me about your friends this evening worries me.' 

'Dad -' Remus started to push, convinced Lyall Lupin would see things differently.

'If your dad - or I - were worried about you making friends, we would have said so to you sooner,' his mother interrupted. 'Remus, dearest, part of going to school is to make friends and memories. Those things are just as important for a good life as a good education. Treasure your friends, they can be a source of strength when life seems impossible otherwise.'

Remus thought back to the times he thought he'd never feel well again, following a transformation, and how the idea of seeing the other Gryffindor boys had helped him return to life sooner than he'd otherwise believed possible.

Leaning into his mother's arm, he hugged her: 'You're right. I'll write to James. Thanks mum.'

Remus looked up at his mother's kind face: 'you're the world's best mum.'  

'I don't know about that, my darling,' Hope laughed a little sadly, 'but you're definitely the best son any mother could ask for.'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'There are going to be so many people,' Sarah complained.

'Think about all the revenue,' Carl argued. 

'They are only there because of that stupid article by Cheater Skeeter.'

'All publicity -'

'Oh shut it, you,' Sarah said throwing a piece of chicken at Carl.

They were in Sarah's small and dingy kitchen, having a late dinner. James knew that Sarah had got this flat with her boyfriend at the time, Lucian, but that as soon as Alex left Hogwarts, she had moved into the spare room, and the three had lived there together until Alex'... accident. 

He remembered little of this, but he had asked his mum once why Sarah lived in such a run down, small flat, with all the money she was making. Carl's place was also small, but despite being just one bedroom, it was bigger than Sarah's two-bed flat - and a whole lot nicer. 

According to his mum, there wasn't much money in Quidditch until your name was made. Sarah and Alex had been set to make their names in the 1966 World Cup - and to begin with they were doing just that. Even James remembered how 'the Shafiq sisters' featured almost daily in the newspapers, until of course, they really did make the biggest headline of them all.  

James still couldn't quite understand why Sarah hadn't moved out, but Euphemia said that sometimes the past held on to you just as much as you held onto the past. He wasn't sure he fully understood what she meant with that. 

It was easier to understand what they were doing in Sarah's place today. Carl had told James that they were going over for some "morale-boosting", which it did seem like Sarah needed. Whether Carl was having any success was another matter entirely.

'They are only there to see us play against each other - like that's a new thing.'

'Imagine what it's going to be like when they get an opportunity to watch you and Bagman play together,' Carl mused.

'I'd rather not,' Sarah replied dryly. 'I wouldn't be surprised if half of the people that turn up tomorrow don't even know the rules of Quidditch.' 

'You'd think people had better stuff to do,' Carl agreed. 'But we'll be there, and we won't have eyes for anything but you.'

'I thought you were rather fond of the idea of Bagman on a broom,' James shot in, and Sarah snorted.

'Do you hear the boy?' Carl complained to Sarah. 'Respect your elders, young man.'

'I like to operate based on a meritocracy,' James said, crossing his arms and sticking out his tongue.

Carl lifted his wand, delivering the usual threat of "keep your tongue where it belongs or I'll hex it off you" non-verbally. 

'It'll suck,' Carl said turning to Sarah, 'but if you win that match it would pretty much make you the favourites for this season. And whatever happens, you've got your two biggest supporters by your side.'

'Definitely,' James agreed.

'Mum, why didn't you tell me it's 4 o'clock already?' James complained as he raced into the kitchen the following afternoon, broom in hand. He'd been out flying, and lost track of time.

'I didn't realise it was my responsibility,' Euphemia Potter said, putting her hands on her hips. 'But you've got plenty of time, dear.'

'No, I don't,' James said, struggling to control his annoyance, 'Carl will be here any minute, we're going over early to watch Sarah's Snitch and Pitch.'

Not every match had one, but on particularly popular Quidditch matches, like this first game between two of the season's favourite teams: the Holyhead Harpies and the Wimbourne Wasps, the captain or a star player would meet some of the fans. It wasn't really anything to watch, Sarah would sign some autographs and answer some questions from the fans, certainly nothing that James would usually bother hanging around for. However, James agreed with Carl: Sarah might need a couple of friendly faces in the crowd today.

'Goodness me. Well, love, you're just going to have to hurry up, aren't you?' his mum said as she waved him towards the door leading to the stairs. 

James took the stairs two at a time, and choosing not to shower, he emerged downstairs less than five minutes later. Carl, however, had arrived and was leaning against the wall in the hallway as he was chatting to Euphemia.

'I've packed some sandwiches for both of you,' James' mum said as she held out James' bag.

'Thanks mum,' James said, giving her a hug and turning eagerly to Carl: 'Let's go!'

They were talking the Knight Bus to the match. James loved taking the bus (though it was naturally inferior to brooms). He especially enjoyed sitting on the top deck watching as the bus leaped from one destination to another, buildings and weird muggle objects jumping out of the way for the bus. Carl was always less keen on the Knight Bus, complaining loudly about James being too young to apparate (although while on the bus, Carl was usually very quiet indeed, typically looking a bit green).

'You okay?' James asked as they disembarked together with two old warlocks near the Holyhead Harpies Quidditch pitch. 

At least it was a home match for Sarah, although privately James suspected the Wimbourne Wasps would defeat the Harpies, so maybe being away from the home crowd would have been better.

'Mh-hmm,' Carl grunted weakly.

'Are you absolutely sure you don't want a sandwich, they are lovely,' James asked innocently, sticking one in Carl's face just to annoy him, though it was true that they were great. James had eaten two on the bus.

'No thanks.'

'Your loss,' James shrugged and took a bite out of the sandwich. There were still plenty left for when Carl's appetite returned.

'Mate, they are delicious,' James said, chewing happily as he followed Carl's footsteps.

'Don't walk and eat at the same time, Jamie,' Carl said, his voice growing a bit more steady again.

James shrugged once more, and when Carl looked away, James took another bite.

Carl nodded to the security wizard, who let them skip the queue into the Snitch and Pitch area. Once they were inside the fencing, they walked to a spot where they would be able to see Sarah (and she them) without being much in the way of anything.

It was boring, watching Sarah come out and greet the fans. Though James was pleased to see that Sarah was acting as cool as anything. It didn't much surprise him. It was a long time since James had picked up on the fact that just because people projected confidence, it didn't necessarily mean they were confident. Occasionally, James would see Sarah look up at them, and he knew she appreciated their presence, even if she didn't show it. 

'It's never a bad day when I get to watch you looking gorgeous,' Carl said as they approached Sarah once the crowd had been sent away. 

'Creep,' Sarah said, rolling her eyes. 'You seemed so sweet until you opened your mouth.' 

Whatever Carl was planning to say next got cut off by a female voice: 'Excuse me, are we too late?'

Carl and James turned to see a woman with dark frizzy hair and skin that was slightly darker than Sarah's stand by the entrance to the Snitch and Pitch. Next to her were two girls, probably around the ages of eight or so, one possibly a bit older than the other. Both girls had dark hair, but that's were the resemblance stopped. The slightly taller girl had a pale face with pink cheeks, whereas the other girl could have passed for Sarah's own daughter, her hair tied up in a similar fashion, and she had the same chocolate coloured eyes. It was only when they approached, Sarah having waved them over with a smile and a 'not at all', that James realised that this girl's hair was plaited, and that unlike Sarah's hair, it might very well be just as frizzy as the woman's hair.

'You're just in time, as a matter of fact,' Sarah said, smiling at the woman.

'May Hestia and I have an autograph each please?' the girl with the plaited hair asked confidently, holding out two posters: one of Sarah, and one of the full team.

'Of course,' Sarah said, kneeling down. 

'So you are Hestia,' Sarah asked the girl with the pink cheeks, who nodded. 'And what is your name?' 

'Gwenog!' The girl breathed immediately. 'Gwenog Jones, and one day I am going to play for the Holyhead Harpies.'

'She is your biggest fan,' the woman, who presumably had to be this girl's mother, said with a kind smile.

'The Harpies are the best team,' Gwenog agreed readily. 'Plus, witches are better at Quidditch!'

This James wanted to vehemently disagree with. Sure, Jenny Robins was a fantastic seeker - and chaser, it had to be said - and Ciara Ryan might be the best chaser on the Gryffindor team currently, but James was confident that he would beat Ciara by the time he was her age. Besides Gideon and Fabian Prewett were fantastic beaters, and it was Fabian who was the captain of the Gryffindor team. Fine, looking outside the team, Sarah was great, but James was equally sure that he had the potential to surpass her, reach Alex' levels, with some time and practice. But then again, Alex had - technically speaking - been a girl. 

The conversation had moved on by the time James had finished thinking about this, concluding in his own mind that witches were probably just as good at Quidditch as wizards, but not better.

'Well, I better get going,' Sarah said, handing the posters back to Gwenog.

'It was nice to meet you, Gwenog, and you, Hestia.'

Everyone wished Sarah good luck, Carl last of all. He hugged her tightly, and whispered something into her ear that James couldn't hear, but which made her smile. 

'You're not... I haven't read anywhere that Miss Shafiq has a partner,' the woman said to Carl as the five of them walked towards the stands.

'Sarah and I are not together. We're childhood friends - family, really.'

'And is this your son?' the woman asked.

'James, no, Merlin,' Carl said, shoving James playfully. 'He's... we're related, but neither of us are sure exactly how. He's Sarah's cousin, so we've come to watch her.'

'We've seen almost all of her matches this summer,' James shared, enjoying the look of envy on Gwenog's face. It was nice to be reminded about how cool it was to be related to Sarah.

'That's quite a feat,' the woman agreed.

'Oh, James makes it sound much cooler than it is,' Carl said addressing the two girls, 'some of the matches are not so very exciting. But this one should be really good.'

Gwenog seemed pleased to hear this, and James decided to be quiet if Carl was going to be such a spoil sport. As far as James was concerned, Carl had lied: the matches had all been very exciting.

'They aren't both yours, are they?' Carl asked, sounding tentative.

'This one is,' the woman said, putting an arm on Gwenog's shoulder.

'Hestia is my cousin. The way Sarah is yours,' Gwenog said, turning to James.

James was tempted to tell Gwenog that he understood the meaning of the word cousins, thank you very much, and that it was nothing like having Sarah for a cousin in any case. Sarah was famous and Hestia was a nobody.

'Mother and father aren't into Quidditch, the way aunt Eira and Gwen are,' Hestia explained. 

'You're Eira Jones,' Carl said, stopping suddenly.

'Yes,' Eira said, looking somewhat unsure of herself for the first time since Sarah had waved them over. 

'Anwen and I work together,' Carl said. 'Sorry... I just had no idea I was in the company of Anwen's two nieces.'

'Oh dear Anwen,' Eira said, but for all the warmth in her voice, there was something more guarded over her expression.

'I am sorry for... well in any case, it's probably not something you want to be reminded of now.'

Eira nodded once, and they started walking again.

'So that means you're a healer?' Eira finally asked as they reached the stairs.

'Yes indeed, spell damage. Same as Anwen. I suppose I didn't really introduce myself: I am Carl Potter.' 

'Well, Carl Potter, it was nice to meet you and your family,' Eira said, then she paused: 'Will you... please send Anwen my love. I've not seen her for quite a few months.'

''Course,' Carl said as they kept climbing the stairs.

'This is us,' Eira said shortly after.

A rather awkward goodbye followed this announcement, before James and Carl continued up the stairs to their own seats.

'What was all that about? Why did she seemed bothered about you knowing Anwen?' James asked as they finally sat down.

'That doesn't bother her,' Carl said, then hesitated, 'or I don't think so. No, I remember Eira's name because her husband passed away two years ago - Anwen's brother, that is, well one of her brothers. I didn't really want to say anything more about it, Gwenog shouldn't need to be reminded of her father's passing on a day like this.'

'Oh,' James said, not knowing what to say and once more feeling an uncomfortable knot in his stomach, which seemed to appear every time he thought about people who had died. 

His own parents really were very old. How long did he expect that they would be around? 

Suddenly James wasn't so keen on the match. 

'Are you alright?' Carl asked, suddenly frowning.

James didn't want to confess to Carl that what he most wanted just then, was to be home with his mum and dad.

'Yes,' James said finally, 'I just... I think I've got a headache.'

Carl's look of concern deepened: 'You've probably not had enough water. How bad is it? Do you want to go back home?'

Carl's earnest offer, when James knew how important it was to Carl to be at the match, made James feel very guilty indeed about considering leaving the match. Especially as Carl was right to want to be there, this was such an important game for Sarah. James was twelve, for Merlin's sake. He could be without his parents a few hours more. After all, he had gone half a year without seeing them (or almost), and had had no trouble with that. 

'I am fine,' James said quickly. 'You're right, maybe some water would be good. And you need to eat something - or you will have a headache next,' James added, handing Carl a sandwich just as the commentator's voice erupted over the stadium. 

One of the most anticipated matches of the season was just about to start.

Within the first hour, James realised how important the seekers were going to be for the outcome of the match. Both teams had excellent defences, and only one goal had been scored so far: unfortunately by the Wasps.  

By 9 that evening, Carl excused himself briefly to send a message to James' mum, asking if James could stay with him that evening ('that way, we can keep watching. I am pretty sure your mother would want you home soon. Just... er... let's not tell her if the match goes on much longer.'). 

The temperature had started falling, and both Carl and James put on their cloaks. Carl even conjured a blanket for their legs for extra warmth.

By midnight, Carl asked James how he was holding up. James was feeling great. He'd never been one for early evenings, and the match was intense. It was still fairly close between the teams, the score 140 to 100 to the Harpies. Every goal mattered, the crowd was cheering loudly for their home team, and it still looked likely that the seekers could end up determining the match. 

Not long after 3 am, James' eyelids started to feel heavy. He heard Carl clap loudly as Sarah blocked another attempt from the Wasps. James hadn't lost track of the score, but just then he couldn't quite remember what it was... Without fully realising what he was doing, he leaned his head against Carl’s upper arm, blinking slowly, and closed his eyes for what would just be a minute.

At some point, James became dimly aware of Carl gently lifting him up. He felt the movement, the sound of people, the cold air on his face. Too tired to worry, and trusting Carl completely, he let himself sink back into the comfortable darkness.

The next time James stirred, he was aware of the sensation of something soft beneath him. Rolling over groggily, he noticed the weight of a duvet covering him. James sat up slowly. It wasn't his bedroom. The bedcovers weren't his and it didn't smell like home. 

Reaching for his glasses on the nearby nightstand, he slid them on and blinked. Carl’s bedroom came into focus. That’s right, he was staying at Carl’s flat for the night.

Looking down, James noticed he was wearing an old set of pyjamas that had fitted him a year ago, but which was now too tight and the sleeves much too short. 

Glancing at the watch on the nightstand, James saw it was already 10 in the morning. That was very late indeed. 

James jumped out of bed. Racing to the door, he opened it and found himself faced with an empty living room. The blanket was still draped over the sofa where Carl had clearly slept, the only sign that he had stayed there at all.

James paused, glancing around the room. Carl must already be up and about. Then, James heard voices coming from the kitchen. Pushing open the door, he found Carl and Sarah sitting at the kitchen table, both cradling half-full mugs of tea. 

'Hi Jamie, did you sleep well? How's your head? Carl mentioned you had a bit of a headache?'

Sarah looked exhausted, but her dark eyes studied James with such warmth that it made James feel embarrassed. Especially as he had fallen asleep during the match. He had no idea whether to congratulate her - or not.

'Hi Sarah, er... the headache is gone...'

'We won,' Sarah smiled, reading James' mind correctly. 

'Congratulations! That's great!' 

It was also, James had to admit, a little surprising.

'Thank you! Only finished about two hours ago,' Sarah yawned. Turning to Carl she continued: 'I cancelled today's practice and sent the team straight home. I think a break is exactly what the team needed as a celebration.'

'You don't seem particularly happy,' James observed. 'Doesn't this make you favourites for the cup?'

Sarah shook her head: 'We didn't win by anything much, and I suspect they will beat us by a much higher margin when we play against them later this season. No, I'd be surprised if the Wasps didn't win the cup.'

'What was the score difference in the end?' Carl asked.

James had assumed that he and Carl had stayed until the end, with Carl letting him sleep beside him while he continued to watch the match. But now, feeling far too warm and well-rested, he knew that couldn’t have been the case. The match had only ended a couple of hours ago, and if they had stayed until the snitch was caught, they would have barely made it back to the flat by now.

'Only 20 points. The Wasps caught the Snitch.'

'In that case, it was a good thing that it was your team that had the better chasers, and - as was evident throughout the match - the far superior keeper,' Carl said firmly as he got up. 'Tea, Jim?'

'Thanks,' James said.

'I've got more stamina than that arrogant twat-face they use as a keeper in any case,' Sarah said. 

'Next time mum hears me say "arrogant twat-face" I'll let her know where I heard it,' James said with mock innocence.

'Like you've not heard worse by now,' Carl said, as he handed James a steaming mug of tea, 'and of course you're better than prat-y Pritchard, Sarah. Alright, who's for some breakfast?'

'You didn't hear it from me, but Pritchard is going to be the new keeper for the Welsh national team,' Sarah said, 'and thanks Carl, but I better get to bed.'

'You can get to bed once you've had some food,' Carl insisted, 'and it's nice of Wales to make it easy to defeat them when the World Cup comes around.'

When James got home that day, the first thing he did (after he had given his mother and father a hug and accepted a hot mug of cocoa in return), was to write to Sirius, telling him all about the match. The only part he left out was how he had fallen asleep during the match - Sirius didn't need to know that. 

There was very little James could do to make Sirius' life easier over the summer, but writing as often as he could, James told himself that Sirius would at least know that there was someone in his corner. Someone who missed him. 

James was always careful to be more formal in his letters to Sirius than anyone else, in case they should, somehow, fall into the hands of Sirius' parents. Judging by Sirius' responses, Sirius was taking similar precautions. 

James was convinced that he would get Sirius to come and visit over the summer, though he was vague on exactly how. The idea of not seeing Sirius for two months, of Sirius not being able to enjoy any of his summer holiday, was so painful that James didn't give the possibility much thought. He would get Sirius out. Somehow.

As the days passed, James became more and more desperate to come up with a plan for how. It became all the more important after he received a positive reply from Remus, who seemed to have forgiven him and Sirius. This opened the possibility of the four of them spending some time together, and nothing could be better than that!

As August approached with alarming speed, and James still didn't have any clear plans for how he would get Sirius to visit him, James decided to throw caution to the wind and ask his aunt Dorea for advice. It was good an opportunity to speak to his aunt was fast approaching.  

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

The first weekend in August presented the first real chance James would have to speak to his aunt Dorea after he made up his mind to ask for her help. The whole family would meet at aunt Seraphina's house for a Sunday dinner and that would be James' best chance.

They always tried to make time for one of these Sunday dinners over the summer, despite Sarah's busy Quidditch schedule, and Carl's many inconvenient shifts at St Mungo's. Fleamont, who otherwise hated social gatherings, could make an exception for "events like these" as he would call them. 

'I will come,' he would say, assuming a look of deepest solemnity, 'if you can promise me that there will be plenty of wine, a good spot in your garden for me to read, and no other guests than those I've learned to tolerate by necessity' (the latter was not an uncommon way James' dad would refer to his family). Nobody begrudged him these terms.

The day was a glorious one, and Sarah, James and Carl spent the early afternoon flying together. James particularly enjoyed testing his new Nimbus 1300 which proved to be so much better than his old Nimbus 1000. Sarah also had a go at the broom, as it was rumoured that the English national team might place an order for these brooms next year in preparation for the 1974 world cup. ('It's not too bad, this one,' Sarah joked. Not too bad indeed, it was a masterpiece!) 

The adults - or the older guard, as Sarah and Carl liked to call them, probably because they were also adults - had found more leisurely activities. Fleamont had, as expected, found a shady spot to read his book, and James' mum and Seraphina sat on a bench in the sun, chatting happily together with a mug of tea and a plate of biscuits. 

When aunt Dorea and uncle Charlus arrived, James immediately stopped flying and went upstairs to shower and get changed, hoping to speak to his aunt before dinner. He knew his aunt Dorea was a bit funny about formalities, and he wanted to look his best as he knew she would not approve of what he had planned to ask her. Fortunately, she didn't need to approve of his request, she only needed to not disapprove so much that she would be deaf to his pleading.

'I've never seen James so eager to stop flying, what do you think that was about?' he heard Sarah ask Carl as their voices drifted up from the hallway downstairs. 'I hope it's not the broom?' 

James paid them no attention, making his way from the bathroom to the guest room he always used. 

However, when he came out a little later, he did pause on the landing. Sarah and Carl were still talking, but the conversation had taken a distinctly hostile turn.

'And your issue with her is that she's a "her"?' Carl asked coolly. 

'No, of course not,' Sarah said hurriedly, 'if you truly like-'

'I don't know if I truly like her, that's kind of the point with dating. But she seems sweet, she's pretty and smart. I don't know what there is not to like - yet, in any case.'

'But the child!' 

'What about it? You do realise that most people our age have children?'

'Not everyone.'

'What is this about? Do you object to her having been married? Is it her fault her husband died?'

'No,' Sarah sounded desperate, 'you're misconstruing my intentions entirely. I am just worried that she's looking for something rather serious, and you are... you.'

'Oh, this sounds so much better than whatever I was "construing". Tell me, what is that supposed to mean: I am... me. I'd hate to "misconstrue" this.'

James couldn't believe his ears. He had never heard Carl and Sarah talk like this to each other. They were best friends, trusted each other, had each other's back. Carl's cold tone, the barely contained anger, felt completely foreign to James.

'You get bored easily. You know you do. And I just don't think that's fair on someone who's already gone through so -'

'Dating is about trying to work out if you like someone enough to continue to evolve your relationship. It involves taking risks. That's how it works. That's how it's always worked... I had no idea you would think... You really think I love... this' 

'Forget that,' Carl continued after having cleared his throat, 'we're not even on the same page about what "this" is. You think I love going around breaking hearts or whatever.'

'Of course not!'

'So what then?'

Sarah made no reply.

'So that's it, huh?'

The bitterness in Carl's voice was unmistakable. 

Neither spoke for a bit. 

'You know, it's not my fault you never put yourself out there again, after Lucian.'

'I - what?'

'That's just it. You've never gotten over him. And instead of accepting that falling in love is scary, you decide to go around judging those of us who try.'

Another pause followed this.

'You're right,' Sarah said eventually, her voice gentle. 'I don't have the heart to "put myself out there" or whatever it is that you do, but you're wrong to think this is about Lucian.'

'Of course it's about Lucian!' Carl by contrast had raised his voice. 'There was never anyone else. You recently said so yourself. "He was the one" - those were your words!'

Those hadn't precisely been Sarah's words, but James supposed Carl was close enough.

'This isn't about Lucian!' Sarah had also raised her voice.

'Then what is it about?'

'Sarah dear,' came the voice of James' mum, and James could hear her footsteps nearing the two. 

Carl swore. 'I'm going to go and get changed.'

There was the familiar sound of someone disapparating. Carl clearly had decided to go back to his flat. 

James could hear Sarah's approaching footsteps and realised that she was about to walk up the stairs. James quickly rounded the corner and started making it down the same way. He didn't want to be caught listening. 

Sarah came into view. James wasn't sure whether to say hi or just walk past her. He was saved from making up his mind, however, as Euphemia appeared at the bottom of the stairs, and spotting Sarah she exclaimed: 'There you are! Sarah-dearest, your mother asked if you could join her -'

Sarah whipped around so quickly James was worried she'd lose her balance on the steps, but then again, Sarah's reflexes were exceptional: 'Oh hi, aunty. Kitchen, right? I'll go now.'

With that she made it down the stairs she had just started to walk up. 

'What is the matter?' Euphemia grabbed Sarah's arms as Sarah had tried to walk past her. 

'Nothing,' Sarah said as James too reached the bottom of the stairs.

'Sarah, darling, what is wrong?' James' mother asked, at the same time sending James a quick glance that told James quite plainly that she wanted him out of the way. 

James, however, had no intention of going anywhere just then. He couldn't make sense of the conversation between Carl and Sarah, and if Sarah shared anything with his mother, he wanted to be around for that.

'Really, it's nothing. I'll go and find mum before she sends out a full search party,' Sarah said quickly.

With that, Sarah left them. 

James hadn't been able to grab his aunt Dorea by the time they sat down for dinner. He had tried to follow Sarah on the pretence of needing some water, but was quickly pushed out of the kitchen once he'd been handed a glass. Recognising a lost cause, he'd gone to find his aunt Dorea but by then, his aunt was engaged in a conversation with James' mother. 

James found himself stuck in a boring conversation with his uncle Charlus and his dad about his uncle's new life as a retired wizard. In a way, it wasn't too bad, standing there with the two men, because it gave James more time to think about the conversation between Sarah and Carl. 

Sarah had been upset that Carl had found someone - well, Eira Jones was the likely candidate for who - because she was worried Carl was going to... get bored with her? Well, that stood to reason: the women Carl had brought home had never lasted long, and from what Sarah said, neither had the men Carl had dated. Carl had, on his side, maintained that this wasn't by choice. 

James didn't really spend that much time thinking about his cousins lives outside of the family, but he had assumed both Carl and Sarah were happy: Carl a successful healer, Sarah, a successful Quidditch player. 

Carl was also not bad looking. At least that was the impression James got from spending time with Carl, with women often glancing Carl's way more than once. It had therefore never occured to James that Carl might want something different to what he had. That he might be... not lonely, precisely... Carl had many friends, colleagues, family; he had Sarah. What then? James didn't know.

Then there was Sarah, who was visibly upset after that conversation. Was she happy with her life? The conversation seemed to suggest that she too was less than happy about not having a boyfriend. 

Why were adults so obsessed with romance? Wasn't friends and family enough? James was quite sure that as long as he had his family, and Peter and Remus and Sirius, he'd be quite happy. 

The dinner looked to be a sad affair. Sarah had excused herself with a headache and gone home. Carl was unusually subdued, and James' mother had taken James aside and asked him to be "well-behaved" as Seraphina was rather upset her daughter was unable to join. 

'I say, Sally, you don't think Sarah ought to consider retirement soon?' uncle Charlus turned to aunt Seraphina half-way through the roast chicken. 

'What makes you say that?' aunt Seraphina asked, frowning.

'Every time I've seen her lately she seems rather exhausted... and now this headache. She's getting on. I don't think I've ever heard of a Quidditch player that played into their late thirties.'

'Then it's a good thing she's a long way off that age - my dearest Charlus, she's only thirty-one,' Euphemia said, after a quick glance at her sister.

'You know what I mean,' uncle Charlus said, 'quite a few Quidditch players throw in the towel by the time they are Sarah's age - especially witches, seeming as they want children.'

Did Sarah want children? Did Carl? James added these to the list of questions he had never asked himself about his cousins, but which he now wondered whether he should know the answers to. 

James was pretty sure he loved his cousins. They were caring, clever, loyal and above all, a great deal of fun to hang out with. Could you love someone and not know much about them? 

Glancing over at Carl, whom he sat next to, James noticed that he was staring at his plate, his fists clenched tight under the table. Maybe James didn't know as much about his cousins as he had previously believed, but he knew it was unusual for Carl not to speak up to defend Sarah. It was a sizable accusation by Carl's father: suggesting that Sarah was no longer up to scratch on the Quidditch front. 

Well, if nobody else was going to tell uncle Charlus he was wrong, James just had to do it instead. 

'Sarah is just as brilliant as she always have been! Better even!'

Uncle Charlus just smiled indulgently at James.

'We saw the Harpies take down the Wimbourne Wasps.'

'Impressive, I am sure, but -'

'They are the seasons favourites, and she beat them,' James insisted. 

Unable to stop himself he glared openly at Carl. If uncle Charlus wasn't going to believe James, he might still believe his own son. 

'Carl and I saw her,' James repeated. 

Carl nodded, but said nothing.

'You don't agree with uncle Charlus, do you? You saw her! She was brilliant!' 

James was struggling to keep his anger under control. Carl was Sarah's best friend. Best friends had each other's backs.

Euphemia was sending James stern looks, but everyone else' eyes were fixed on Carl, as if he was some sort of final judge.

'James is quite right, father,' Carl said, finally. 'Sarah was essential for the victory against the Wasps, both as a captain and as a keeper. She's at the top of her game. Every match has been a treat to watch. If she wanted to retire, I'd support her, of course. That's her decision, but there's no reason for her to quit as far as I can see.'

'But you can't deny that she's... more reduced,' aunt Dorea said.    

'That's Rita Skeeter's doing,' aunt Seraphina said, sounding very tired all of a sudden. 'Sarah's been on edge ever since that article.'

'No wonder, poor thing,' James' mum added, 'every month there's some new reminder to drag up the past.'

James felt Carl shift beside him. Looking at him, James thought Carl looked more unsure of himself, and, just like aunt Seraphina, he looked tired.

'But the article was published last year.' It was aunt Dorea's time to frown. 'I don't see it being that interesting, Alex and that Bagman fellow having had a relationship.'

'That's because you don't follow Quidditch, mother. Ludo Bagman is the most sought after player in the league at the moment. He's wildly talented - and more importantly for this story - he's handsome and single. This drama adds intrigue to the sport.'

'How much intrigue can one possibly get out of a romance that happened six years ago?'

'A lot,' Carl sighed. 'I am worried England is playing it up: Sarah against Bagman. It's great for the ticket sale.'

'Surely they care more about the welfare of their players?' James' mum asked.

'Whether the English national team is adding to the publicity Alex, Sarah and Ludovic Bagman is getting, is neither here nor there,' Fleamont said calmly. 'The only thing we should concern ourselves with is how to help Sarah, to the extent she is willing to let us do just that.'   

Everyone returned to their roast shortly after this comment. Or almost everyone. Carl's gaze had returned to his plate. 

'Is there something wrong with the food, Carl?' aunt Seraphina asked, clearly having noticed him not eating. 

'I -,' Carl started, running a hand through his hair - in not a too dissimilar fashion to what Sirius would do when he was unsure of something, James realised. 

'I'm sure my sister can excuse you, if you wanted to go and check on Sarah,' James' mum said, smiling kindly. 

'Quite,' Carl agreed. Clearing his throat, he stood up. 'I was just thinking, I might have something for that headache.'

'You're the expert,' Euphemia agreed.

James considered for a moment asking if he could join Carl. Unlike the others, James knew it wasn't a headache that bothered Sarah, and he wanted to make sure she was okay. And Carl. James couldn't quite forget how hurt he had sounded talking to Sarah. But he'd promised himself to ask his aunt Dorea about Sirius, and that had to come first. 

'Those two haven't changed one bit,' aunt Dorea said once Carl had kissed her on the cheek and said his goodbyes. 'If one is in pain, so is the other.'

Aunt Seraphina shook her head and smiled sadly: 'I can never quite forget how Sarah couldn't stop crying when Carl fell off his broom and broke his arm when they were children.'

'Or when Sarah came down with the flu the following winter,' aunt Dorea added, 'I couldn't get Carl to come home until he was quite sure she was back to full health.'

'You know Sarah asked the sorting hat to put her in Hufflepuff after Carl got sorted into the house, so that they wouldn't be separated at school?' aunt Seraphina asked.

James hadn't known, but the adults all nodded in the annoyingly reminiscent way they sometimes did.

'She really didn't have to worry,' James' mum said. 'Sarah is both clever and brave, but in the end it's her loyalty and hard work that define her.'

The adults all seemed to agree with this, because they all nodded once more.

'Then Alex started school, and asked the hat to be put in a different house to her sister,' uncle Charlus said. 'Wasn't it quite so?'

'Indeed,' aunt Seraphina agreed, but her face hardened slightly.

'She was another one that didn't need to worry,' aunt Dorea said, 'I always knew Alex was a Slytherin - fiercely ambitious, that girl.'

'Alex was in Slytherin?' James couldn't believe it. He had liked Alex. Very much. A Slytherin?! Surely not!

Aunt Dorea laughed: 'We're not all bad, you know?'

Of course, James realised, his aunt Dorea had to have been in Slytherin. How had he forgotten Sirius' words to him: "My whole family has been in Slytherin." His aunt Dorea had been a Black, and with that came certain expectations. Expectations Sirius had broken, James thought, feeling a surge of pride for his best friend.

'I'd forgotten,' Euphemia said, 'that Alex and Sarah didn't really get along all that well in school.'

'Sarah always adored Alex. It was Alex who never wanted to live in her sister's shadow,' aunt Seraphina agreed, 'but all that changed after Sarah left school. Sarah would come and visit every Hogsmead weekend on Alex' request, and I am afraid to say both she and Carl snuck into Hogwarts a few times to see Alex too. I didn't know anything about it at the time, naturally.'

James' aunt paused for a second, before she continued, her voice shaking slightly: 'I think Alex never had an easy time making friends. That was always Sarah's territory - well Carl's more than any, but of the two girls. I fear she was rather lonely in her last years at Hogwarts.'

'True, but I think once she got the contract with Puddlemere United, she found herself surrounded by enough people who wanted to be her friend that she was never very bored. And by then Alex knew she didn't have that long left before she could leave school behind,' aunt Dorea said.

'By then she didn't have long left,' Aunt Seraphina's voice was suddenly raw and she looked away.

'My dear, I didn't mean... I am sorry, I only meant... it's dreadful,' aunt Dorea said, looking horrified.

'It's getting late,' James' dad interjected.

'Quite,' Euphemia agreed. 'Dearest, I know you've prepared a delicious-looking treacle tart for us, but I wonder...'

James' mum let the sentence hang in the air. James felt horrified at the idea of not being able to have some of the treacle tart, but he knew better than to protest. Alex was - and would always be - a difficult topic for his family.

'You are right as always, sister-dearest,' aunt Seraphina said, sounding more like herself again. 'Why don't you take the treacle tart home with you, and then we aim to meet tomorrow for tea and cake? The adults will be working, but us retired folk must be allowed to enjoy our afternoons. I am sure I can count on you two as well?' 

Aunt Seraphina turned to aunt Dorea and uncle Charlus.

'Of course,' aunt Dorea said quickly, looking, it seemed to James, somewhere between guilty and relieved.

'Why should we take the tart?' James' mum asked.

'Two reasons,' aunt Seraphina smiled weakly. 'I am worried I am coming down with a headache too, and it would be a shame to deprive the rest of you of the tart should I not make it tomorrow. But even more importantly, I think there's one young man who might want to steal a slice or two this evening.'

Everyone's heads turned towards James, who grinned back at them. Euphemia laughed: 'Of course, Merlin, how could I forget.'

As everyone stood up to leave, James forgot all about the treacle tart. He had a question he needed to ask his aunt before they all said goodbye: 'Aunt Dorea, could I please speak to you?'

'Now?' His aunt looked puzzled. 

James knew there was a chance that he'd see his aunt the following day, but he didn't want to leave anything to chance. 

'Now,' James confirmed. Sirius needed rescuing.    

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

July had been a terribly boring month, as far as Sirius was concerned. The first three weeks had been spent at his uncle Cygnus and aunt Druella's manor. This did admittedly give Sirius more opportunities to fly, as it was located far away from any muggles - thereby giving him an excuse not to spend time with his family, but even that felt like a poor consolation when Regulus showed off his new Nimbus 1251. 

'It's not as good as the Nimbus 1300 will be,' Sirius pointed out when Regulus showed him his broom, 'and anyways, why do you need a broom? First years aren't even allowed to bring one to school!'

But Sirius knew all too well why Regulus had been given a broom. It was a "the little prince has been a good boy, unlike nasty Sirius" present from their mother. 

'I thought I might try out for the Gryffindor team,' Sirius lied to his mother that afternoon, but all she did was suggest he didn't forget his Nimbus 1001. Sirius supposed the encounter could have ended worse.

'I support your decision to try out for your team, if you so desire it,' Regulus had said pompously to Sirius later, 'but if you make it, do not forget that it is more likely a reflection of the quality of the Gryffindor Quidditch team than your ability to fly.'

Sirius took that comment to mean Regulus was upset with him for his previous remarks about his new broom.

'And what team are you hoping to try out for, Prince Reginald?'

'Don't call me that,' Regulus scowled.

'Then stop acting like a pompous prat.'

'Slytherin,' said Regulus a couple of evenings later. 

They were sat in a small drawing room, alone. After dinner, Orion, Cygnus and Alphard had gone on to a stinky little room to drink firewhiskey, and the women had moved onto an evening parlour to discuss Bellatrix' upcoming wedding to Rodolphus Lestrange. It was a good match, in Sirius' eyes. He knew the two were friends - had been since school - and since neither seemed likely to do any better, the might as well have each other. He was also grateful the wedding would take place in fall, when he was safely back at school.

'Stinks, I agree,' Sirius replied without looking up from his book. 

Regulus sighed: 'Slytherin is the house team I would be trying out for, which I believe you already know.'

Sirius looked up despite himself. Regulus sat straight-backed, his shoulders tense, his face neutral, but he was fidgeting with the sleeve of his robes, which told Sirius he was nervous.

'You're right,' said Sirius, trying to inject as much cold disapproval as he could into his voice: 'I did know you were a coward.' 

Regulus snorted, and Sirius wanted to laugh. It was so human to snort - so unlike everything Regulus aspired to be - that for a moment Sirius forgot what they were discussing. 

'Just because I am not a Gryffindor, it doesn't make me a coward.'

'I agree.'

'So I am not a coward,' Regulus stated stubbornly.

Sirius looked up, seeming to consider this; allowing Regulus the false hope that Sirius might concede. 

'Still a coward,' Sirius said finally, turning another page and ignoring his brother for the rest of the evening. 

Sirius had spent the first few days at his aunt and uncle's house coming to terms with the idea that nobody in his extended family cared that much about his sorting. Over Christmas, Sirius had primarily spent time with Regulus and Walburga, and at school Narcissa gave him as wide as berth as possible, so it was only now Sirius realised that Orion, as well as his aunt, uncle and cousins, didn't really see it as that big a deal.

Sirius wasn't sure who it infuriated the most, him or his mother. Sure, the few times he saw Bella she liked to call him "her little baby kitten" (and Sirius did his best not to show her how much that name annoyed him). Cissy, on her side, wasted no time telling everyone about all the misadventures she and Lucius had caught him doing. Overall, however, Sirius was surprised at how little things had changed since last year.

Well, in regards to his family's views about him, at least.

'Cheers,' Bella said, raising her wine glass imperiously during their final evening together before Sirius' family would return to London. 'This will be the last time we're all together as Blacks.'

'We're not all together,' Sirius said, crossing his arms and refusing to join in the toast. 

Everyone ignored him until they'd drunk their stupid toast. Once the goblets were back on the table, Walburga sent Sirius a warning look, but Bella looked at him - almost hungrily.

'Pray tell, my dear cousin, what do you mean: we're not all together. Nobody is missing, as far as I can tell.'

Bella's eyes glinted dangerously, daring Sirius to continue. 

'I quite agree, Bella,' Cissy said, her haughty face turning right and left as she pretended to scan the table. 

'Your sister?!' Sirius argued, refusing to back down. 

Walburga made some protesting noises, but Bella raised her hand to stop Sirius' mother from interfering.

'We're both here,' Bella breathed, leaning forward.

'Andromeda?'

Bella's lips twitched upwards in a cruel smile that most resembled a grimace.

'I didn't catch that,' she dared him.

'ANDROMEDA,' Sirius said, his voice raised as he stretched out the name. 'Your sister. Your daughter.' Sirius turned to his aunt.

Druella said nothing, she just looked coldly at Sirius.

'My dear sister, do you know anyone with the name Andromeda?' Bella asked, suddenly casual.

'No, Bella-dearest,' said Cissy, 'I don't believe I do.'

'Formerly known as Andromeda Black, now Andromeda Tonks.'

Sirius wasn't stupid. He knew that they were pretending to not remember Andromeda, but he, Sirius, wasn't going to let them get away with it. They couldn't just erase Andromeda.

'DO NOT,' Bella said, raising her voice for the first time, and looking, Sirius had to admit, quite dangerous, 'speak the name of that filthy mudblood again.'

'Regulus, you remember her, surely?' Sirius asked, desperate to have one person who acknowledged the loss. 

Regulus had adored Andy. 

To Sirius' disappointment, Regulus just stared at his plate, saying nothing.

'Uncle?' Sirius turned to uncle Alphard, but he too remained silent.

'That's quite enough,' Orion said, finally. 

Sirius knew he would already have to pay for his indiscretion, but there was no point in continuing. Andy was as good as dead to this family. Worse, in fact, because she was not mourned, nor remembered. Instead, the family had removed her from their memory almost as effectively as if they had used a memory charm.

Would that be him, one day? His mother seemed to think he was heading that way, but nobody else did. Sirius didn't know what was worst: the idea that his family would pretend he had never existed, or the idea that he wouldn't be able to prove to them just how much he disapproved of their ways.

The first weekend in August found Sirius once more at odds with Walburga. Sirius might have decided to steal an ice cream from a muggle shop, making sure he was caught. The shop owner contacted the muggle law enforcement when he couldn't get Sirius to give him a number which apparently he could use to contact Sirius' parents with. But his parents had no muggle-devices at home, so Sirius could not give him any such number. When the muggle law enforcement - "the police" - arrived, the owner apologised to them for 'wasting their time with such petty crime', telling them it was really out of concern for Sirius he had contacted them. A likely tale, Sirius thought. 

However, everything was going to plan, because these police people brought Sirius to some sort of station where they kept him until they could get hold of his parents. How Walburga found him, he didn't know, but he assumed the Ministry of Magic might have been involved. Sirius hoped that was the case, at least, because it would make it all the more humiliating to his mother.

'Hello mother,' Sirius greeted his mother, 'missed me much?'

She didn't answer. Walburga just marched him out of the station, likely having confunded the police people. Sirius' mother didn't speak to him until they got home - and then, speaking wasn't exactly the right term to describe what she did either.

That evening, Sirius was sent to his father's study. Sirius was trying not to think too much about what his father would do or say to him, but to his surprise, Orion simply invited Sirius to a game of chess.

'You play well, Sirius,' Orion said approvingly some time into the game. 'Am I to understand it that you've found time to play a fair bit, in-between all your school work and mischief?'

Orion raised his eyebrows as he finished the question.

'I play with James Potter,' Sirius said, hating himself for feeling a surge of pride when Orion had complemented his play.

'And he's a good opponent?'

'He is.' 

'Better than you?' 

'I win more frequently.'

Sirius kept his replies short, unsure whether he wanted to prove to his father how worthy James was as a friend - or how unworthy he was.

'I wouldn't have expected any different from you. Still, that is impressive from the Potter boy.' 

As it was not a question, Sirius had nothing to add. Technically speaking, James was likely better than Sirius at Wizard Chess, he just got distracted too easily. But his father didn't need to know that.

'It shouldn't come as a surprise,' Orion continued. 'His mother and father are exceptionally talented - in their own way, and blood matters immensely.'

Blood mattered for shit in Sirius' view, but he couldn't quite muster the courage to say so, not when he was playing against his father. Not when he was spending time with the only intelligent soul in this godforsaken place.

'I know you disagree,' Orion said, quietly. 'That's natural. You're still very young. You possess far more intelligence than your mother, and dare I say it, my youngest son. It's natural that you should reject the ideas you're being told, in favour of trying to find out the answers for yourself.'

Sirius hadn't tried to find out answers for himself. The answers were right there! His family were delusional for believing that blood had any relationship with magic, or that muggles had any less right to exist because they didn't have magic. Sirius had seen muggle families that seemed far more loving, far more curious and - well - magic than his own family. And Sirius knew that people like Evans, as annoying as she could be, had just as much magic in her as he did.  

'You're not stimulated enough in school either, I can see that. You are a Black, and like me, you have too much magic in you to be content with the pace they set at Hogwarts. Your mother, while being a Black too, has never quite been blessed with the same level of talent. You must understand that your rule-breaking looks different to her than to me. I am confident,' here Orion paused, and looked directly at Sirius, 'I know, in fact, that you need this phase before you are able to step into the role of the heir that will carry forward the Black legacy. When the N.E.W.Ts come around, you will find yourself stronger for everything you have tested and tried and challenged. And you will find academically, that the N.E.W.Ts will suit you better. Like in chess, you will find me a patient man, Sirius.'

Orion held out his arms and Sirius looked down at the board. With a sinking sensation in his stomach, he realised he had lost the game.

'Dorea, darling, what an unexpected surprise,' Sirius heard his mother say imperiously the following Tuesday. 

Had Sirius been near his mother, he'd dearly loved to say: 'as opposed to an expected surprise,' but alas, he had been making his way back to his bedroom. Now, however, he stopped on the landing. Dorea surely had to be Dorea Potter. 

'My dear niece, it's been too long,' another female voice said, though Sirius didn't quite believe either woman to be particularly pleased to see the other.

What in Merlin's name was Dorea Potter doing in Grimmauld Place? Well, Sirius could think of only one reason. Sure enough, about two hours later, Kreacher turned up in Sirius' bedroom with a message: 'My Mistress wants to see young Master Sirius downstairs.' 

It was impressive how much dislike the house-elf managed to put into every syllable of the statement.

'My mother wants many things Kreacher,' Sirius said dismissively, but he quickly slid the letter he'd been reading from James under his pillow, and pushed himself off the bed.

'Bugger off, will you,' said Sirius as he passed the elf, resisting the urge to pretend to kick the foul thing.

'So this is young Sirius Black,' a woman, who looked like a rounder, kinder - and slightly older - version of his mother, said as Sirius entered the living room. 'I haven't seen you since you were a little child.'

Sirius knew that, even if he couldn't quite remember anything about her.

'Hullo,' Sirius said, hovering just inside the door. He wasn't quite sure what he was expected to do.

'I've heard a lot about you,' said Dorea, indicating that he should take a seat opposite her, which sadly meant next to his mother. 'You seem to have struck up quite the friendship with my dear James.'

Sirius nodded as he sat down, stealing a glance over at his mother who had so far barely acknowledged that he had entered the room. 

'Your parents and I have just discussed the possibility of you coming to stay with James' parents, Euphemia and Fleamont Potter, who happen to be my good friends.'

'Father was here?' Sirius asked his mother, curiously.

'Briefly,' she said, stiffly.

Sirius looked back at Dorea, unsure what would come next, but Dorea in turn looked at Walburga, who sighed, impatiently.

'The Potters are thankfully from two old pureblood lines - even if...' but here Sirius' mother chose to stop herself. Nobody could be in any doubt where she'd been going with the sentence.

'Your Father is of the opinion that on the whole, you were well behaved at your aunt and uncle's, and that despite some minor indiscretions, you have earned your right to spend a week with your Gryffindor friend.'

It seemed to cost his mother a lot to say this, and Sirius was therefore in no doubt about what she thought about the whole matter.

'He thinks it could be stimulating for you.'

Sirius was confident Walburga didn't even understand the meaning of the word stimulating.

'I will come and pick you up on Saturday, and you will stay with the Potters until the following Sunday - assuming that is of interest to you?'

Sirius nodded again, not quite able to believe his own ears. He'd be spending time with James? He'd be allowed to spend a full week away from his own horrid family?

'Just remember, Dorea, we have consented to Sirius spending time with that Potter-boy, not any other less worthy friends. I don't want Sirius to mix with boys of less pure lineage.'

Sirius clenched his fists at the way Remus and Peter were being described. He had been looking forward to seeing Remus, who he had received a letter from, delivered, like all his letters from his friends, by Duchess, explaining that he had forgiven him and James. Sirius had even been looking forward to seeing Peter, who had written on a few occasions, and who Sirius had come to regard fondly when compared with Regulus and Walburga.

'I quite understand,' Dorea nodded solemnly.

'And all of this changes if you don't behave over the next few days, Sirius,' Walburga added.

'Of course, mother,' Sirius gritted out.

Sirius was going to see James. Yes, it'd be better if he could also have seen Remus and Peter, but he was going to see James. He couldn't believe it. 

Over the coming days, however, Sirius realised the gravity of his situation. His parents now had a way to control his behaviour. As much as Sirius wanted to spite his mother, and argue with both his parents about their twisted views, Sirius did not want to do anything that risked losing this opportunity to see his best friend.

'Look at this,' Orion said, having led Regulus and Sirius up into his study two days after Dorea's visit. 

'A picture?' Regulus asked curiously, moving to remove the cloth that covered most of the surface.

'Do not remove that cloth, son. And no, not a picture. A mirror. Beautiful thing it is too,' Orion said, letting his fingers trace the silver frame. 'Anyone looking into this mirror will see themselves reflected in the way they most fear. From then onwards, they can never look at themself the same way again. It drives muggles mad.'

Orion frequently dealt in dark and cursed magical objects.

'And what's the point of a mirror that we can't use?' asked Sirius, though he quite knew why his father had procured it.

Orion raised his eyebrows: 'I would have thought that was obvious to you, Sirius.'

'To study the magic, naturally,' said Regulus, eyeing the covered up mirror as hungrily his father. 'What do you intend to do with it afterwards, father?'

'One thing at the time, Regulus, but I dare say it might find its way into a muggle shop, though obviously if it did, it would not be traceable to us.'

Sirius considered smashing the mirror, and deal with the punishment. He could take the so-called-discipline for something like this - he could even take his father's disapproval - but in the end, the idea of seeing James held him back.

Orion threw Sirius a rather disappointed look as he closed the door to his study a few minutes later. In that moment, Sirius knew it wouldn't be long before his father would come to share his wife's view that Regulus was a much better son. 

If Orion felt disappointed in Sirius, that was nothing to what Sirius felt. Sirius hated the fact that his parents had further leverage on him - real leverage - something he truly cared about. This was why friends were a burden: they made you vulnerable, manipulable. 

They think they can win, Sirius thought morosely lying in bed later that evening. They think I will change - or that they can change me.   

But they can't, Sirius reminded himself. They won't. I won't let them. James won't let me.

He knew very well what he would see in that mirror. What he would see would be his parents dream, and his worst nightmare.

'I am not like that,' Sirius said out loud to the silvery grey walls. 'I am not like them.'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'Sorry,' Alice apologised, still beaming, 'we shouldn't really be talking about this today, today is all about Fabian, but... it's exciting.' 

Having been on a month's holiday in Spain with her brother and parents, Alice was catching up on the bigger news in the Prewett-Weasley family.  

'Oh I don't mind,' Fabian said quickly. 'Getting another nephew or niece is definitely my idea of a top notch birthday present. Although Gideon has the nerve to claim it's his birthday present...'

'He has a point, dear,' said Molly - the traitor. 

'A December baby?' Alice asked curiously.

'End of November,' Molly beamed.

'If it's anything like William, that means a December baby,' Fabian pointed out.

'Hm...' Molly said, frowning, 'I'd much rather this one was on time.'

'Does William understand that he's going to be a big brother?' Alice asked curiously.

'William is already a big brother, the way he sees it at least,' said Fabian. 'Mary,' Fabian explained when Alice looked puzzled.

'Yes, well, this is different,' Molly said.

'Indeed, I assume you're not plotting a prospective marriage between your two children,' Fabian grinned. Mary, on the other hand... 

'Fabian Prewett!' Molly exclaimed in frustration.

'Molly Weasley,' Fabian replied, 'it's good we've got the names sorted.' 

Molly opened her mouth to reply, but just then, their mother entered the kitchen.    

'There you are! Dearest, we've been looking for you. You've got to come and open your present from us. The guests will be arriving any moment, and it'd be nice to do this with just the family.'

'What could it be?' Fabian pretended to muse as he and the others moved into the living room. 

'I know,' said Gideon as Fabian accepted the small square package. 'It's a new broom!'

Fabian tore off the wrappings and opened the box to reveal a golden watch, just like Gideon's, with stars circling around the face.

'Thanks mum, dad, it's... great!' 

Fabian didn't know why he was getting so emotional about the watch. Maybe because it hadn't been that long since he'd been fighting in St Mungo's, or maybe because he still remembered the fear that he wouldn't make it to adulthood when he was a child. This was it. He had made it, and in most part due to the people in that room.

He got up and hugged his parents tightly - repeating a quiet thank you as he did so - unable to find any other way to communicate just how much their love mattered to him.

'It won't look like that for long,' Gideon grinned as he bent over to study the watch. 'Remember his old watch?'

'I love my possessions and they bear the traces of it,' Fabian shrugged.

'You could try to be a little more careful,' Molly offered.

'Nah, it wouldn't be Fabian's if it didn't have some dents in it,' said Marshall, just as they heard the unmistakable sound of guests apparating outside the house.

'You could take your apparition exams now,' Gideon grinned at Fabian, 'except if you want to pass.'

Fabian threw the gift-wrapping at Gideon as he got up to greet the guests.

Soon, they moved the celebrations outdoors, as it was a glorious August day. There was a meadow close by, with a large pond, some shady trees and - once they had all successfully relocated - over a dozen wizards and witches strewn across the grass.  

The Gryffindor boys in their year were standing around a table which was laden with food. The rest of the guests had seated themselves on blankets, a sandwich or two in hand. Mr and Mrs Fawley were chatting to Fabian's mum and dad. Ciara and her older brother, and former Gryffindor chaser, Declan Ryan, were chatting to Arthur's brother, Bilius, who (Fabian guessed much to Molly's displeasure) had arrived with Arthur and William. 

Gideon, Alice and Fabian, on their side, were sitting with Arthur, Molly and little William under a shady tree. Fabian intended to make the rounds soon so as to speak to all the guests, especially looking forward to helping himself to some sandwiches as he said hi to Jay and the others, but for now, he was enjoying his time with his nephew. 

William at a year and a half was infinitely cuter and more interesting than he had been a year ago. Alice would repeatedly summon a stick, which William would lift up in air as if he was holding a wand. When nothing happened, William would throw the stick away, only to laugh happily when it zoomed back to them. Sometimes (Fabian couldn't help himself) Fabian would hex some bubbles to float over the boy as he lifted his stick, and William would look absolutely amazed at the magic he thought he was doing.

'Stop teasing him,' Alice said, as William kept lifting his stick, expecting more bubbles to magically appear.

'Do you want to see something really fun, William?' Fabian asked his nephew, who nodded eagerly and repeated: ''un!'

'That's right. Uncle Fabian is fun,' Fabian smiled down at William. 'Uncle Gideon, however, is as boring as an old owl... unless,' Fabian lowered his voice and bent down conspiratorially, 'we make him fun.'

With that, Fabian waved his wand and the goblet Gideon was holding spat the liquid right into his face. William fell over sideways as he and Fabian roared with laughter at Gideon, who on his side blinked and tried to wipe his face. 

'Your girlfriend is very loyal, Gid,' Fabian remarked as Alice fought hard to keep her face neutral, her lips continuing to twitch, as she handed Gideon a napkin.

'Girlfriend, eh?' Arthur asked, and Fabian cursed inwardly. 

Gideon hadn't wanted to "advertise" his relationship with Alice, as he had put it. 

Gideon sent Fabian his trade-mark look of "don't worry about it". Then he stiffened, his eyes shifting to a point just over Fabian's shoulder. 

'Sorry we're late!' came Jenny's voice and Fabian turned to see Jenny and Owen walk over to them.

Fabian got up, noticing that Gideon and Alice did the same. 

'Behave,' he muttered to Gideon, who seemed likely to curse Owen. 

'Fabian, I hope you don't mind...' Jenny continued, 'Owen was staying at mine, so I thought he might as well come. You're good friends anyways, right?' 

'Of course,' Fabian said, pulling Jenny into a hug first. 

Unsure exactly what the right next thing to do was, Fabian pulled Owen into a hug too.

'Happy birthday!' Jenny said as soon as the two broke free, which was both faster than usual, and yet not fast enough in Fabian's view. He could feel Gideon's eyes on him.

'I should have started with that, shouldn't I? Anyways, this is from us.'

She held out a rectangular present, and Fabian opened it to reveal a book with the title: Unbeatable beaters: Brawn, Brains and Bludgers by Thaddeus Bludgeon.

'Open the front cover,' Jenny said, eagerly.

Doing as instructed (Fabian rarely argued with Jenny if he could help it), Fabian found the copy signed not just by the author, but also by -:

'How on earth did you secure Bagman's signature?' Gideon asked, having looked over Fabian's shoulder, and seeming to forget to be annoyed.

Jenny beamed: 'That's all Owen's doing but he won't tell me how.'

'No secret really,' Owen said, looking like he wanted to be anywhere but in the meadow just then, 'it just requires a great deal of stubbornness and a willingness to beg relentlessly.'

'Thank you!' Fabian said, and not knowing what to say next he asked: 'Are you guys hungry? I am starving... Lets see if there are any sandwiches left.'

With any luck, Owen and Jenny would remain with the Gryffindor boys and Fabian could move on to some other guests. Maybe it was time to rescue Ciara and Declan from Bilius?

'I am sorry about this,' Owen muttered as he leaned across Fabian to grab a sandwich a few minutes later, 'I... can we talk? Away from...' 

Fabian got the gist. He wasn't exactly sure this was how he wanted to spend his birthday, but it seemed immature to spend his first day as an adult refusing Owen the possibility to say whatever he felt he needed to say.

'Course,' Fabian said. 

Sending Gideon a "don't you dare follow" look, he and Owen extracted themselves from the rest. Fabian looked over his shoulder to see if Jenny had made a move to follow them, but she was chatting happily to Alice.

'I didn't ask to come,' Owen said quickly as soon as they had sat down in the shade of a beech tree a little away.

'I figured as much,' said Fabian, deciding to look at the trees which marked the beginning of a road further down the meadow, rather than look at Owen. 

Fabian still couldn't get the image of Jenny and Owen kissing out of his head. Over the summer he had had plenty of time to think about it, and he still had so many questions. Had Owen kissed Jenny because he fancied her - were they now dating? - if so, had Fabian really gotten Owen so wrong? 

Fabian had believed, at one point, that Owen had liked him. But if Owen had kissed Jenny for some other reason, maybe to prove... but no, that was unfair to Owen and, more than anything, really unfair to Jenny. 

So what then? 

'Jenny and I aren't... you know, dating, or anything,' Owen continued. 'I just thought you should know that.'

Fabian kept looking at the trees over by the road. 

'That kiss...' said Owen when Fabian failed to make a reply, 'after the Quidditch final was really stupid. I... I like Jenny - a lot, but not... not in that way. I don't know why...'

'I can't really answer that for you,' said Fabian quietly after a few seconds of silence.

'Maybe I can... Maybe I do know...' 

Owen took a deep breath, and before Fabian could stop him, he continued speaking, the words tumbling out of him as if he needed to get it all off his chest as soon as possible: 'I think Jenny did like me and - it was easy, wasn't it? We're good friends. She's - a girl. But easy doesn't mean right. So I told her everything.'

'Everything?'

'Not everything. Not about -' here Owen paused, 'you.'

Fabian finally turned his gaze to look at Owen, who was blushing slightly. 

Owen hadn't said "not about our kiss", he had said "not about you". What did that mean? It couldn't mean... no, there was no use in hoping it meant anything more than the kiss. 

'I told her - I think I am not like other men... I don't... like... women much. Or.... I mean I do, but - not that way.'

'How did she take that?' Fabian asked, trying to push away all other thoughts and feelings. This was about Owen, not him.

'Well - I think. Really well. But she told me not to go home, said that was a bad idea.'

'Why is that?' Fabian asked, realising he didn't know anything about Owen's family. 

'Because she's met my parents - met my sister even,' said Owen, and his eyes were suddenly darker, the nerves replaced by so much anger, and pain - and guilt.

'And they are not very open to the idea that you might like - not like... women very much?'

'Worse.' 

Owen's voice was quiet now. 

'You don't have to tell me anything,' said Fabian quickly.

Owen shook his head: 'No, I do.'

They didn't say anything more for a bit, and then Owen sighed: 'Mum and dad aren't... they don't like magic much. Think it's evil. The work of the devil to be precise. They are very religious.'

Owen's voice was colder, less emotive, but his eyes betrayed him.

'And they let you go to Hogwarts, even though they think magic is evil?' 

'Dumbledore showed up. We muggle-borns don't just get a letter from Hogwarts. Someone comes to explain all the magic stuff. I don't think it was a co-incidence I got Dumbledore - he can be very persuasive. He basically told them it was far more dangerous for me not to learn to control my magic, so...' Owen shrugged, 'they let me go.'

Owen ran a hand through his hair, seeming to consider what to say next.

'I don't think it mattered, all that much, with mum and dad. We've never quite seen eye-to-eye, but Becks, that's the real issue.'

'Becks is your sister?'

'Rebecca, yes. She's my twin.'

The emotions in Owen's eyes intensified, and Fabian had to look away for a few seconds. He didn't know what to say. Owen had a twin, and Fabian had not known.

'It was tough - leaving her behind,' Owen continued.

Fabian could only imagine. He could not picture a Hogwarts without Gideon - did not want to picture it. 

'But she didn't have magic. That's fraternal twins for you. She was really very supportive. It's not like she didn't know we were different - that I was different. She used to love getting letters about Hogwarts, and the first summer I was back I brought her lots of magic sweets and stuff. A couple of books even. I am not sure that's allowed but...' Owen shrugged.

'A very Ravenclaw thing to do,' Fabian agreed.

'Wit beyond measure,' Owen smiled for a second, but then the same pain and guilt spread across his face again: 'It all changed last year. She was all different when I came back for the summer. Didn't want to hear about magic anymore. All she wanted to talk about was Jesus. I - don't get me wrong - in the beginning I didn't mind. I like to talk about Jesus too - and I don't really get to speak much about him... or God at Hogwarts.'

'But this...' Owen continued after a brief pause, 'I just got this bad feeling. And sure enough, a couple of weeks into the holidays, she sat me down and asked me if I now felt I could control my magic, and stupidly I said yes. "So what's the point of going back to your school?" she asked. Your school - she always used to call it Hogwarts. I was... shocked, surprised. I thought she'd understand that it wasn't just about learning to control magic. I was... I am a wizard. I belong in this world - not hers.'

Fabian felt embarrassed, and horrified, and terribly sorry for his friend. It had never really occurred to Fabian that Owen was his only close muggle-born friend. He had no idea what it was like growing up with one foot in the muggle world and one foot in the wizarding world - he'd never needed to give it a second's thought.

'I nearly did drop out,' Owen confessed. 'But then I got the captain's badge. I couldn't believe it. And then when I got your and Jenny's replies, I remember thinking: I can't leave. This is my life now.'

Fabian had had no idea of how close he had been to starting last year without Owen. He was starting to feel slightly sick, the way he sometimes felt if he just managed to save one of his team-mates from an especially awful Bludger. Like he'd been standing at the edge of a cliff, but not known.

'Liking... not liking women the way I am supposed to... that's - I don't really know how much you guys know about Church of England, but they don't take kindly to people like that. And it's so easy to start to wonder whether mum and dad and Becks were right, whether the wizarding world somehow corrupted me. I - I don't need you to tell me how stupid that is,' Owen added hastily. 'I've got eyes. I know that the majority of wizards and witches are different from me - normal.'

Fabian couldn't remember the last time he had heard something less stupid.

'I don't think that sounds stupid,' Fabian said quickly. 'And I am with Jenny, I think it might be better for you to stay away from your parents this summer.'

'I am an adult in our world anyways.'

'So what happens next?' Fabian asked. What happens to us?

'I am spending the summer with Jen and her family and then it's back to Hogwarts. I've got to beat the reigning Quidditch champions next season - take back my team's honour and all that.'

'No chance,' said Fabian, 'we're only getting stronger.'

'So are we,' Owen replied.

They fell into silence for a bit.

'I am gay,' Fabian said, bluntly, before he could back out. 

Sensing how they were comfortably drifting back to their usual conversations, Fabian realised he wasn't ready for them to finish with the serious stuff. Not yet.

It took Fabian a second to process exactly what he had said. The enormity of it all. Gideon and Alice knew, of course - Owen knew, but it was the first time Fabian had actually come out and said the words to anyone.  

Fabian continued before Owen could say anything - stop him, argue with him, support him, 'And I fancy you. But I would never let my feelings get in the way of our friendship, or being there for you. I just need to know - should I move on? Because right now, I don't know what to feel.'

Silence. Fabian decided it was safest to look away for a bit.

'I don't know,' Owen said eventually, his voice constricted. 'I don't fucking know, Fabian. Fuck.'

Fabian looked over at his friend in time to see Owen burying his face in his hands. 

'I know am not being fair,' Owen's voice sounded through his hands, 'but I just need time. I like you. I just...' Owen swore again. 'I am not ready to like you.'

Not knowing where Fabian got the courage from - maybe just because he really wanted to; had wanted to for some time - he wrapped his arms around Owen.

'Time is fine,' Fabian whispered as he felt Owen relax into his embrace. 'You don't need to have all the answers right now. I know I don't.'

Chapter Text

PART 1: 'NO FRIENDSHIP IS AN ACCIDENT' - O. Henry

'SIRIUS!'

Sirius felt the air get knocked out of him as the door swung open and James welcomed him with one of his trademark part tackles, part hugs.

'Mate, how are you?' 

'Good,' Sirius grinned, thinking he'd rarely felt better.

'Sirius, how lovely it is to see you again,' Mrs Potter greeted him, 'Dorea, darling, thank you for bringing him here.'

'My pleasure, dear,' Dorea said, and nudged Sirius forward: 'well come on, boy. We've come this far, haven't we?' 

'Thank you for having me to stay, Mrs Potter,' Sirius said as he entered the house. 

It now occurred to him that he had no idea what families were like - normal families, that was. How was he expected to behave?

'What did we say about this "Mr and Mrs Potter" business? Please call us Fleamont and Euphemia.' 

Mr Potter had just appeared at the other side of a doorway that seemed to connect the hallway with a corridor.

Sirius nodded, feeling strangely out of his depth, not knowing what to say next. What was going on: he was Sirius Black, wasn't he? Why was he feeling so nervous all of a sudden? 

'You should have brought your broom,' James observed.

'I thought you had two?'  

James looked distinctly uncomfortable at this, and glanced nervously at his aunt.

'I better be going,' Dorea said. 'You know the rules, James?'

'You'll be here - every day at ten - to check on us,' James offered readily. 

'Is that really necessary?' James' mother asked, frowning.

'Yes!' The reply came from both James and Dorea.

'Alright, forgive me for asking.'

'Come on,' said James, and pulling on the sleeves of Sirius' robes, James led Sirius through the hallways and up the stairs.

'Is your aunt really going to check on us every day?'

'Yup,' James grinned. 'At ten o'clock precisely.'

Sirius got the impression he was missing something.

'Alright, spit it out,' he demanded as soon as he had seated himself on the extra bed that must surely have been placed in James' bedroom for his visit. 

'Remus and Peter are coming on Tuesday,' James said excitedly. 'My aunt Dorea is a bit... weird, that way. She doesn't want to lie to your family, but she knows mum and dad doesn't give a rat's arse about their "conditions", so at ten every day, we'll hide them upstairs. She won't look. She just wants to be able to tell your mum and dad that she's kept an eye out.'

Sirius felt acutely embarrassed. It wasn't just the idea that Mr and Mrs Potter knew what narrow-minded people his parents were, Peter and Remus would also have to learn about why they had to stay upstairs at ten o'clock in the morning. 

However, the flipside was that he was now going to see all of his friends. Sirius couldn't help but grin at the thought. Not only was he going to hang out with Peter and Remus too, he was going to do so when his mother had expressly forbidden him to do so.

'That's why you wanted me to bring my broom,' Sirius realised. 'It's not just going to be you and me.'

'I am sure we can borrow brooms from Sarah. She's got plenty.'

It suddenly occured to Sirius that he might meet Miss Shafiq. From the way James spoke about his cousin, it sounded like they were close. 

The Sarah Shafiq. Regulus would die of jealousy. Scratch that, Sirius' former self would die of jealousy. She was easily the best keeper England had seen for years.

Sirius did indeed meet Sarah Shafiq, and he didn't have to wait long.

'So this is Sirius Black, huh?' a voice asked. 

Sirius turned to see a man in dark blue robes enter the kitchen. The man had to be Carl Potter. He was tall, with black hair that was closer to Sirius' than James' messy variety, but which curled a little at the edges, something neither Sirius' nor James' did. Like James, he wore glasses, but he looked, in Sirius' view, more like an adult version of himself than even Sirius' own father.

'Curious, much?' James grinned.

''Course I am bloody curious,' Carl exclaimed and took a seat next to Sirius. 'James can't shut up about you.'

'Carl is prone to overstatements,' Mr Potter said, not looking up from the Daily Prophet crossword that had occupied him since James and Sirius had sat down at the table earlier, 'but this is not one of those occurances.'

'Thanks for the introduction, uncle.' 

Carl threw Mr Potter a look that the latter was too pre-occupied to notice. 

'Well,' Carl sighed, 'In any case, as Fleamont just said, I am Carl.' 

Carl stuck out a hand and Sirius took it. However, he was barely aware of letting go, because a woman had taken the seat opposite Carl, and Sirius had no trouble identifying her as Sarah Shafiq.

'Hi,' he said, stupidly. 

'It's so nice to meet you. I am Sarah.'

Sarah's voice was soft, and her chocolate-coloured eyes full of warmth. It was all very different to the Sarah Shafiq Sirius had read about in the papers - watched play once even.

They shook hands. 

Sirius tried hard not to stare at his hand afterwards. He had just shaken hands with Sarah Shafiq. Regulus was definitely going to die of jealousy.

'I saw you play once.' Sirius forced himself to say something. 'Three years ago, against the Montrose Magpies.'

Sirius wished he hadn't gone into the specifics. "I saw you play once" would have been sufficient. Why bring up the match? It hadn't been the sort of game you brought up with the captain of the Harpies, if you could help it.

'The June game?' Carl asked eagerly, as Sarah shook her head-: 

'Please don't say it was the June match,' she begged Sirius.

Sirius shrugged: of course it had been the June match.

Carl burst out laughing, and Sirius grinned apologetically as Sarah groaned. 

'Of all the matches you could have watched... I mean to say...' said Carl, once he'd stopped laughing.

'Please tell me you're joking?' Sarah said, her hands in her face. 

'He's serious,' said James innocently, but Sirius didn't think anyone else picked up on the so-called-joke.

'Right, we're going to need to get you some tickets to another game.'

'Do you really want him to watch any of the remaining games this season though?' Carl asked.

'Oh don't,' Sarah groaned again. 'I don't need to be reminded of that today.'

Sirius knew why the topic of the remaining season was bothersome to Sarah. One of her chasers, Martha Ryan, had needed to withdraw from the rest of this season on account of being pregnant. Her replacement was by no means awful, but the change had been enough to lead the Harpies to lose the only match they had played since the announcement.

'What team do you support, Sirius?' Carl asked, turning to Sirius again.

Sirius felt there was only one right answer, but he wasn't a Harpies fan, however much he thought Sarah was brilliant. 

'Wimbourne Wasps,' said James quickly. 'Like me.'

'Really,' Carl raised an eyebrow at James, 'I distinctly remember you supporting the Harpies when they played the Wasps recently?'

'Yeah, well, would you have let me come otherwise?' 

Sirius was sure that Carl and Sarah, who must know James better than Sirius did, were aware that James' number one loyalty would always lay with the Harpies.

'Do you play any Quidditch?' Sarah asked.

'Of course he does,' said James.

'James Potter, we are trying to talk to Sirius,' Carl exclaimed. 

Turning back to Sirius, Carl asked: 'So what do you play?'

'At school, mostly keeper or chaser, but I am a beater at heart.' 

Was that true anymore though? Sirius really did enjoy playing chaser with James.

'So you must be a fan of Bagman?' 

'The best beater England has seen for some time, playing for Sirius' favourite team, what do you think, Carl?'

'Can you keep quiet for one minute, Jimmy?'

'No,' Sirius and James chorused, and grinned at each other.

'Sarah, Carl, what a delightful surprise!' 

They all turned their heads to watch Euphemia re-enter the kitchen. 

'There's plenty of breakfast left if you want to help yourself to some?'

'Carl will no doubt want some before we get started with the packing, but I am all good. I've got a breakfast meeting with some sponsors. Living the life.'

Sarah stood up again: 'I'll see you in two hours, eh?' she asked Carl.

'Nah, I've changed my mind.' 

Sarah huffed indignantly, but she squeezed Carl's shoulder as she passed him, and he winked up at her.

'If you stare any harder, your eyes are going to pop out of your sockets,' Sirius observed, looking over at James who was holding a leather-bound book.

Upon learning from Euphemia that "packing" was Sarah moving to stay with her mother for a bit while she looked for a new place, James immediately offered to help. Had it been anyone else's flat, Sirius would have been annoyed with his best friend - the weather was glorious - but he had to admit that seeing Sarah Shafiq's flat had held some appeal. 

Mostly, Sirius had found that he'd been disappointed by what he saw. The flat was oppressively dark and tiny - had three people really lived there the way James had told him? 

On the plus side, Sarah had an eyewatering collection of brooms that he was allowed to inspect. Furthermore, James, Sirius and Carl had been tasked with packing Alexandra Shafiq's old bedroom. Most of the living room and kitchen packed itself, but Sarah wanted to go through some of her own stuff, and she suggested that they also went through Alex' stuff.

'We can do that,' Carl offered when Sarah mentioned it.