Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

[Grian] added [GoodTimesWithScar], [MumboJumbo], and 14 others to the chat.

[Grian] renamed the chat to [COOL PEOPLE]

[Grian]: Hey everyone and welcome to LIFE!!!

[GoodTimesWithScar]: Cool

[GoodTimesWithScar] changed their name to [Scar]

[MumboJumbo]: Grain, what is this

[Grian]: WhO iS tHiS gRaIn ChArAcTeR???

[MumboJumbo] changed their name to [Mumbo]

[Grian]: Where is everyone?

[Solidarity]: I'm here now

Way to start someone's day

I don't even know half of the people here

[Solidarity] changed their name to [Jimmy]

[Grian]: Oh for goodness sake

[Grian] changed 13 other's names.

[Grian]: Okay, done

Does anyone want to go to the new amusement park down the road

[Gem]: Did someone say amusement park

[Grian]: Have you been listening to this conversation this whole time

[Gem]: Nah, I was summoned

[Grian]: How does that even work

"Ooo, look!" Grian pointed at a large sign that read "Ride the Flying Pigs and learn to fly!"

"Oh, hey, remember that Flying Pigs video game I made?" Lizzie asked. "This reminds me of that!"

"Oh, yeah, I remember that!" Joel elbowed her playfully. "I swear it was rigged."

"You're just sore you lost," Lizzie told him.

"Everyone lost!"

"That's true," Scott said. "No one won. We all won dead pig trophies."

"I still treasure that dead pig trophy," Joel told him. "Best trophy ever."

"Okay, you ready?" the employee pushed a button. Grian screamed as he shot up into the air, sitting in an electrical boat. All his friends cheered by the sidelines as Grian "flew" away. Then, they all took turns "flying" in the boat.

"I love this group," Joel said when they were all done. "Very chaotic."

"That's us!" Jimmy cheered. "We're the Bad Boys!"

Most people in the group didn't know eachother before being added to the group chat. It was awkward, at first, but Grian's joking helped ease everyone down. Then, Grian got nosy and a bit weird.

[Grian]: Have you guys met your soulmates yet

[Mumbo]: What brought this question on?

[Grian]: No reason.

Absolutely none.

Whatsover.

[Mumbo]: Wow you're punctuating your sentences now?

[Grian]: nope nope nope

[Joel]: Haha awkward Grian

Let's all laugh at him

#awkwardgrian

[Scar]: #awkwardgrian

[Mumbo]: #awkwardgrian

[Gem]: #awkwardgrian

[Pearl]: #awkwardgrian

[Bdubs]: #awkwardgrian

[Tango]: #awkwardgrian

[Etho]: #awkwardgrian

[Martyn]: #awkwardgrian

[Skizz]: #awkwardgrian

[Lizzie]: #awkwardgrian

[BigB]: #awkwardgrian

[Impulse]: #awkwardgrian

[Cleo]: #awkwardgrian

[Jimmy]: #awkwardgrian\

[Joel]: NOOO JIMMY YOU BROKE THE CHAIN

[Grian]: Ha

Too bad

[Joel]: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[Grian] Anyway

Are any of you going to answer the question?

[Gem]: What question

[Grian]: the question that prompted that mess

[Gem]: Huh?

[Grian]: scroll up

[Gem]: OH

[Gem]: Yeah nah

[Grian]: WHYYYYY

[Gem]: I'm not interested in that sort of stuff

[Mumbo]: Me neither

[Grian]: HOW

HOW ARE YOU NOT INTERESTED???

[Mumbo]: I just don't care I guess

[Joel]: I mean I care

But I don't know who it is

[Grian]: Ooooooooooooooooo

[Joel]: Seriously ur so nosy

[Grian] :'(

[Joel]: Ha

#sadgrian

[Mumbo]: Ah yes

#sadgrian

[Gem]: #sadgrian

[Etho]: #sadgrian

[Grian]: NO NOT THIS AGAIN

STOP THAT THIS INSTANT!

[Scar]: #sadgrian

[Grian]: NO DON'T

[Impulse]: #sadgrian

[Grian]: STOP THIS INSTANT

[Tango]: #sadgrian

[Grian]: NOOOOO

JIMMY BREAK THE CHAIN

[Jimmy]: #sadgrian

[Grian]: ARGGGGGGGGG

"I'm bored," Grian complained, drinking from a smoothie.

"Too bad," Joel told him. "#sadgrian."

"WHY," Grian demanded. "WE'RE NOT EVEN IN THE CHAT."

"Ehh," Joel said. "It's fun."

Suddenly, Grian sat up. "Let's play Hermitcraft!" Grian declared "Come on, call the gang over!"

Hermitcraft was a card game that had grown popular a few years ago. They shuffled and passed out cards and settled in a circle around the "bank".

"I fish," Grian said, putting down two time tokens.

"You fish up salmon," said Mumbo, who was the Watcher this round.

"Aww, come on!" Grian pouted. "I've fished for so long and I still haven't gotten a mending book!"

"Ooo, let me try!" Scar said. "I fish."

"Okay," Mumbo said, drawing a card. "Oh look! You get a mending book!" he brandished the card.

"WHYYYYYYYY?" Grian yelled. "LIFE IS SO UNFAIR!"

"Ha," Pearl bragged. "I won!"

"This game is rigged!" Joel declared.

"You think all games are rigged," Lizzie told him.

"All games are rigged!" Joel said.

"You're just sore you lost again," Grain told him.

"You lost too!"

"Yeah," Grian glared at Mumbo. "Because SOMEONE wouldn't give me MENDING."

"Hey! Don't blame me! I'm not the one who shuffled."

"Who shuffled, then?" Grian demanded.

"Impulse," Mumbo told him.

"IMPULSE! GET OVER HERE!"

[Mumbo]: Impulse, r u ok?

[Impulse]: Yeah, Grian isn't that terrifying

[Grian]: HEY!

I'M VERY TERRIFYING!

[Joel]: Nah, you're not.

[Scott]: You know, you really should work on your terrifyingness

[Cleo]: Scott, that's not a word

[Scott]: It is now

[Lizzie]: Who wants to recreate Flying Pigs?

[Grian]: Ooo I'm in!

[Joel]: I'll do it!

[Etho]: Sounds cool

[Jimmy]: I'll do it as long as I'm not the test subject for your crazy ideas

[Grian]: Sure

Etho can be the test subject

[Etho]: Wait, what???

[Joel]: Ha

#sadetho

[Etho]: you know what

[Lizzie]: #sadetho

[Etho]: Grian, I am starting to understand why you hate this so much

[Grian]: #sadetho

I know right?

[Jimmy]: #sadetho

[Etho]: You know, if you join the attackers, it makes me feel less sorry for what I'm going to do now

[Grian]: WHAT?

[Tango]: #sadetho

[Etho]: #backstabbergrian

[Grian]: NOOOOOO

[Joel]: Oooo

That's cool

#backstabbergrian

[Grian]: NOOOOOOOOO

[Tango]: #backstabbergrian

[Etho]: #backstabbergrian

[Jimmy]: #backstabbergrian

[Gem]: #backstabbergrian

[Pearl]: #backstabbergrian

[Grian] WHY IS IT ALWAYS MEEEEEEEE

[Joel]: Because ur stupid

[Cleo]: #backstabbergrian

[Scott]: #backstabbergrian

Also, Joel, you broke the chain this time

[Joel]: Oh no

[Grian]: HA

#chainbreakerjoel

Etho: #chainbreakerjoel

[Joel]: No no no wait

Jimmy broke the chain first

[Jimmy]: but you did it this time

[Jimmy]: #chainbreakerjoel

[Joel]: ARRRGGGGGGG

[Grian]: School's starting soon

[Mumbo]: Aww that's sad

I liked hanging out with everyone

[Grian]: ...

[Gem]: Mumbo, you know everyone here goes to the same school, right?

[Mumbo]: ...

[Mumbo]: you know, I actually didn't know

[Joel]: Ha

#cluelessmumbo

[Grian] JOEL

ARE YOU TRYING TO DIRECT THE ATTACKING TO MUMBO

[Mumbo]: Yeah Joel

[Joel]: You guys all did it to me!

[Scott]: No we didn't

[Joel]: Yes you did!

Scott, you did it to me!

[Scott]: I did no such thing

[Joel] yeah right

[Scott]: See, even you know your lying yourself!

#lyingjoel

[Joel]: that was sarcasm!

[Mumbo]: Yeah too bad

#lyingjoel

[Joel]: SARCASM

[Grian]: #lyingjoel

[Joel]: You know what

I give up

[Gem]: #lyingjoel

Chapter Text

[Grian]: Is everyone excited for school?

[Joel]: yeah, no

I hate school

they always try to get you to behave

[Grian]: you know, I dunno what I expected when I asked you that question

[Joel]: Ha

that's me!

So unexpected and handsome!

[Grian]: We're going to get together for a "last night before school" party!

Except it's not on the last night before school it's before that

We can't go to school if we don't sleep at night

[Mumbo]: Then think of a new name

[Grian]: Mumbo, "the day before the last night before school" doesn't sound very nice

[Gem]: You know, for once, I agree with Grian

[Grian]: What is THAT supposed to mean???

[Gem]: Exactly what you think it means

[Grian]: I have not even BEGAN to process that sentence yet

[Joel]: HA

#slowgrian

[Grian]: Joel, you're doing it again!

Trying to force the attacks on someone else!

[Gem]: You know what, taunting Grian is more fun than taunting Joel anyway

Grian cares more about being taunted than Joel does

#slowgrian

[Grian]: WAIT NO-

[Mumbo]: You know what, Gem?

I'mma join you

#slowgrian

[Joel]: Ha

#slowgrian

[Jimmy]: I'm here what u guys talking about?

[Gem]: We're taunting Grian again

#slowgrian

[Jimmy]: oh okay

#slowgrian

[Grian]: So many betrayels

[Joel]: Ha you can't even spell betrayals right

#dumbgrian

[Jimmy]: That's going a bit to far, isn't it?

[Joel]: Nah

[Gem]: I mean, I like it

#dumbgrian

Grian knows we're joking, anyway

Right Grian?

[Grian]: You know, I'm tempted to just say no to get you to stop

[Joel]: Nope

not happening

We'll all know you're lying

[Grian]: Dang it

"HELLO AND WELCOME TO THE PARTY!" Grian had somehow gotten his hands on a microphone and was blasting his voice and his weird music taste into the speakers that he had also gotten his hands on somehow.

"Quit being so loud," Pearl complained. "My poor ears!"

"WELL," Grian screamed. "TOO BAD!"

"#loudgrian," Joel declared.

"YOU KNOW," Grian said, "THAT ONE'S NOT HALF AS BAD AS THE OTHERS!"

"#dumbgrian," Joel amended. Grian glared at him.

"ANYWAY, TODAY We shall be- HEY! Who unplugged the mic?" Grian searched the crowd but couldn't figure out who it was. "Okay, anyway, what do you guys wanna do?"

"Hermitcraft," Mumbo suggested.

"No, let's watch a movie!" Jimmy was sitting in one of Grian's uselessly squishy couches, leaning into Tango's warmth. Grian's house was seriously cold. "Also, Grian, turn on your heater!"

"I don't have one," Grian mumbled before turning on the TV.

"YOU DON'T WHAT?" Jimmy demanded before he was distracted by the television. "Ooo, look! The Empires movie is out!"

They ended up playing Hermitcraft while Empires played in the background. It was a lousy game due to the fact that half of the people weren't paying attention but were instead watching the TV, but really, who cared?

"Is this going to be a sleepover or something?" Martyn asked just as the Mesa Prince got married to the Ocean Princess.

"Dude, you have the worse timing," Jimmy said, his eyes still transfixed on the screen. "You gotta wait until this scene is over and- HEY! REN! STOP BLOCKING THE TV!"

"Oh sorry," Ren said, not sounding sorry in the slightest. He refilled his popcorn while Jimmy craned his neck to see around him.

"It's going to be a sleepover," Grian told him when he was done with his turn in Hermitcraft. "Say, that prince looks a lot like you, Joel!"

"That's me! A long lost prince!" Joel declared, brandishing his "sword", which was really a rolled up newspaper. "Ooo, hey, does anyone want to watch this little animation I made?"

"Sure," Grian said. Most of the group was interested, but Jimmy's eyes were still transfixed on the TV.

"Just play it without him," Cleo said when Joel shot Jimmy a look. Joel shrugged and played the video.

"WELCOME TO HERMITCRAFT NEWS AT SEASON 10!" the video blasted Joel's voice just like the speakers had blasted Grian's. Even Jimmy looked away from the TV to give Joel a glare.

"Alright, alright, I'll turn it down!" Joel said.

"I'm Smallishbeans, and he's the Smallishbeans subscribe button." Everyone (except Jimmy) laughed at that.

"You posting this on your channel?" Grian asked.

"Yup," Joel replied.

"Please click me" the button said in a monotone voice.

"Yes, please click him," Joel said onscreen.

"Oh this is great," Cleo said, shoving popcorn into her mouth.

"Anyway, our first discussion today is who has been killing all the horses?"

"I mean, there are two people, and one of them is you," Cleo pointed out.

"I know the second one, but I'm not going to tell you," Grian followed up. "It's your fault for not paying attention last game."

"Hey," Joel protested, but shut up as everyone's attention went back to the video.

"What do you think, subscribe button?"

"Please click me," the subscribe button repeated.

"Agreed," onscreen Joel said. "Next up we're heading to spawn where..."

"Wow, truly amazing," Scott said when the video was finished. Then, the credits played.

Anchor: Me

"Ha," Mumbo said.

Co-Anchor: Subscribe Button

"Gotta love the subscribe button," Martyn said.

Reporter: Me

Researcher: Me

Editor: Me

Director: Me

Producer: Me

"Wow," Cleo said.

Features: Other Hermits

"Yeah!" Scar cheered. "Go Hermits!"

Obsessed With Me: Etho

"Really?" Etho said, raising an eyebrow.

"You're my biggest fan, really," Joel said, sporting a shirt with Etho's face on it.

"Aww," Gem said.

Horse Head Props Provider: Me

"Gotta love those horse heads too," Martyn said.

Creator of the Group Chat: Grian

"I did do that, me," Grian said, looking immensely proud of himself.

Camraman: Me

Teleprompter: Me

Script: Me

Cooking Dinner Tonight: Me

"Aww, you're going to cook dinner for us?" Scott asked.

"No, this was a few days ago," Joel protested.

"Ehh, fine," Scott said, disappointed.

"Round of applause for Joel!" Grian declared, clapping.

[Grian]: First day of school everyone!

[Joel]: You know that's funny

[Grian]: ?

[Joel]: It's always you who contacts everyone first

[Grian]: I mean, you're the always the first one to respond too

[Joel]: ...

That's a good point

[Jimmy]: Grian, Joel, everyone's in class

[Grian]: I know

[Joel]: We just don't care

[Grian]: Plus, Jimmy, you're texting too

[Jimmy]: Good point

[Joel]: That's because we're the BAD BOYS

[Jimmy]: Oh yeah!

I remember that!

I made up that name at the amusement park!

[Gem]: Did someone mention an amusement park again?

[Grian]: Seriously

Gem

How do you do that?

[Gem]: Do what?

[Grian]: you know, show up whenever someone says "amusement park"

[Gem]: Oh, it's just something I do

[Grian]: Hmm

[Bdubs]: Okay, what happened here

I have free period and I come online to see this

[Grian]: We're just chatting

[Bdubs]: In class?

[Joel]: Yup

Don't mind us

[Jimmy]: We're bad boys

[Bdubs]: You know, I'm going to have to agree

You guys and Etho stole ALL my wheat in Hermitcraft

[Joel]: That was your own fault for leaving it there in the open for everyone to steal

[Etho]: Exactly

[Jimmy]: Next time, just fish

[Grian]: NO

DON'T DO THAT

I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO BEAR IT IF YOU ALSO GET A MENDING BOOK BEFORE ME

[Bdubs]: hmm

tempting, tempting

[Grian]: NOOOOOOOOOOOO

[Jimmy]: Is no one going to mention the fact that Etho is also apparently a bad boy?

[Joel]: no he's not

how could you say such a thing

[Jimmy]: I mean, he also steals crops and he just came online to text

and he's in my class so I know he's not supposed to have done that

[Joel]: Jimmy, ur weird

[Grian]: It's lunch time! Where should we sit?

[Scott]: What about the big long table in the center

[Gem]: That one's taken

Our class was let out early

A bunch of the "popular girls" got their hands on it

[Lizzie]: Aww that's no fair

We got out late

It's a pain to clean up after a science experiment

[Grian]: Everyone, ur getting distracted!

What table?

[Joel]: What about the broken one

No one sits there ever

[Grian]: ...

Joel

There is a reason why no one sits there

It's broken

[Joel]: Who cares really

[Cleo]: I don't

[Scar]: I don't care

But find a table soon I just got my lunch and I don't wanna just stand around like a weirdo

[Grian]: Okay fine

I can see I'm outnumbered here

[Lizzie]: Okay, it's my free period and I know a lot of you guys text in class anyway

so

when are we going to recreate Flying Pigs?

[Joel]: I dunno

This weekend?

[Lizzie]: Who's house?

[Joel]: I mean, I would suggest Grian's house

because his house is so big

but is backyard isn't that big though

[Grian]: Yup it's tiny

[Lizzie]: I did not expect that

your house is enormous though

[Grian]: Lizzie

some people just can't have enormous houses AND backyards at the same time

[Lizzie]: Fair point

[Joel]: What about the others?

Anyone have big backyards here?

[Lizzie]: Nope

[Impulse]: Just saw the messages

trying to do my homework here

[Joel]: oh hi

do you have a big backyard???

[Impulse]: no

[Joel]: Hmm

[Jimmy]: I don't either

[Joel]: Maybe it's because almost everyone is in class I-dhiueorbforyeilgiwoaepiegforuyvfs

[Grian]: u ok?

[Joel]: Joel will not be messaging you until the end of the day

Goodbye

[Grian]: HUH?

Joel, did you get caught

[Impulse]: Grian if he got caught he wouldn't be able to respond to you

[Grian]: oh

[Lizzie]: Grian, you're very clueless

[Grian]: well, is anyone in Joel's class?

What does Joel have rn?

[Lizzie]: English

I think Jimmy's with him

[Jimmy]: I'm here

yes

his phone was taken away

sorry it took me so long to reply

didn't want to get caught

wait gtg bye

[Grian]: ok...

Chapter Text

[Grian]: Okay!

It has been decided we are recreating flying pigs at Etho's house!

Because of this, I am tempted to change the test subject from Etho to Joel

[Joel]: WHAT

[Grian]: But I won't because it's funny

[Etho]: Wow

[Lizzie]: I'm so excited!

[Joel]: Me too

[Grian]: U r excited about this but not school?

[Joel]: Grian

I hate school

No where near as chaotic as this group chat

But making everyone in the group chat fly?

That is chaotic and fun

[Grian]: Fair point

[Joel]: See? I'm always right

[Jimmy]: When

[Joel]: Jimmy

are you only doing this because ur not the test subject

[Jimmy]: No

absolutely not

[Joel]: At least ur not punctuating ur sentences now

Grian does that when he's nervous

[Grian]: I DO NOT

[Gem]: Yes you do

[Scar]: I can confirm.

[Scar] sent a picture.

[Grian] disliked a picture.

[Scar]: :'(

[Joel]: Grian!

u made scar sad!

[Gem]: Grian how could you

[Scott]: yeah Grian how could you

[Scar]: *cries*

[Joel]: Look now he's crying

#meangrian

[Gem]: #meangrian

[Lizzie]: #meangrian

[Scott]: #meangrian

[Grian]: NOOOOOOOO

[Scar]: #meangrian

[Grian]: Scar, YOU TOO?????????

[Scar]: Grian, you hurt me

#meangrian

[Grian]: I regret making this group chat

"Okay, is everyone ready?" Grian readied the machine and Etho swung his legs inside the small space.

"Ready for launch!" Lizzie called.

"Go!" Everyone heaved on their fishing rods at once and Etho went shooting into the air.

"Look how high he's going," Grian said, pointing.

"Is it as high as the one in the amusement park?"

"Nah," Joel said. "We need to try something else."

"No, Jimmy, I can't see why painting a pig on the machine will help anything," Grian protested.

"Hey!" Tango said. "I like the pig!"

"Sure, the pig is cool, but," Grian searched for words, absolutely flabbergasted at the pink box with a nose and two beady eyes.

"But what?" Tango demanded.

"Nevermind," Grian muttered. Giving the two of them a look. Jimmy and Tango shared a glance before shrugging.

"I'm betting they're soulmates," Grian whispered the the crowd watching when he joined up with them again. "Two gold nuggets."

"Oh, only that much?" Joel whined. "This bet is going to get no where if you only offer that puny amount!"

"Fine," Grian relented. "An iron block."

"Ooo," Scar said.

"Ehh," Joel shrugged. "I bet a diamond for they're soulmates." this time, Scar whistled.

"18 gold ingots for not," Lizzie said. Joel shot her a look. "What? I just have a lot of spare gold. I honestly don't know, but there has to be an opposing team to this bet, doesn't there?"

"Sure sure," Joel said, rolling his eyes. "I'll win though, you'll see."

This time, the ship went much higher up.

"I told you the pig would help," Jimmy bragged.

"Jimmy," Grian protested. "It was the extra motor, not the pig."

"You're just in denial," Jimmy insisted.

"#grianisindenial," Joel said.

"Not again!" Grian grumbled to himself and stomped off.

The third time, Grian swore he lost sight of Etho just as he started falling down.

"We're getting closer," he muttered.

"To what?" Pearl asked. She was genuinely curious. "We surpassed the amusement park's record ages ago."

"Because of the pig!" Jimmy shouted from the background.

"I want to make Etho disappear out of sight before I call this a win," Grian said, determined.

"Are you sure this is safe for me?" Etho asked, sidling up to them

"I'm, like, 30% sure," Grian said, to much protest.

The forth time, Etho disappeared for a good ten seconds before reappearing again. Grian cheered every second he was gone.

"We're getting closer!" He yelled as Etho touched down again.

"That was crazy," he said, climbing out. "I think I need to sit down."

"Scar, you're up!" Grian said, pointing at the machine.

"Why is it always me?" Scar whined.

"I dunno, mate!" Jimmy said, clapping his hands together. "But really, anything is better than me."

For the fifth time, they rebuilt the machine and replaced some of the heavier materials with lighter ones. Grian was sure they were holding the machine back. After they were done making the new machine, he let Jimmy paint a new pig onto the machine under the encouragement of Tango.

Definitely soulmates, Grian thought, amused.

When Scar climbed into the ship, Grian convinced Etho to help launch the vehicle up into the air even though he was still a bit dizzy.

"Everyone counts," Grian had said, dragging Etho up a scaffolding tower.

When the ship launched, Grian could not believe how long Scar was up in the air. Grian feared that they had launched him too far east and he had somehow ended up in China or something.

"I'm back!" Scar had shouted when he landed. "And I also need to sit down, even though really, that was amazing!"

"I think we should take a break," Jimmy said after their fifth try, wiping sweat off his forehead. "I'm going to go home."

"Noooooo," Grian tried to latch onto Jimmy to prevent him from running away. "We're so close!"

"I agree with Jimmy this time," Joel said. "It's getting late, anyway."

"Me too," Lizzie said. "I love this, this is amazing, but really, I'm worn out."

"Fine," Grian grumbled. "But be back tomorrow at the same time!"

[Grian]: Wait, who's keeping the machine?

Etho said he couldn't keep it

[Skizz]: I am

[Grian]: ok cool

[Scar]: I am somehow STILL dizzy

Grian this is ur fault

[Grian]: How is this my fault?

Lizzie was the one who came up with this idea

[Lizzie]: don't blame it on me

you were definitely the most stoked about the whole thing

[Joel]: yup

Grian, you were ecstatic when we couldn't see Scar for 10 seconds

[Scar]: you couldn't see me?

[Grian]: No

It was like Etho but for much longer

[Etho]: You couldn't see me?

[Grian]: no

[Gem]: Wow

We're getting good at this, aren't we?

[Lizzie]: yup! :D

[Joel]: :D

[Scar]: :D

[Mumbo]: :D

[Gem]: :D

[Grian]: :D

[Skizz]: :D

[Jimmy]: Why are you guys all texting at this hour

I'm trying to sleep

[Joel]: Jimmy

It's only 10

[Jimmy]: That's really late for me!

[Grian]: haha

Too bad

[Joel]: Rise and shine!

[Jimmy]: NO.

JOEL.

WHY.

IT'S 3 IN THE MORNING.

[Joel]: so u punctuate your sentences when ur angry

good to know

[Grian]: You know what

I would be mad if this was any other day

but not today

Joel my savior I thought I was going to wake up late

[Jimmy]: GRIAN IT'S 3 IN THE MORNING

[Joel]: Jimmy we're the bad boys

we can do what we want

[Grian]: yeah Jimmy

You're a bad boy too, right?

RIGHT???

[Jimmy] FINE

But go chat on a private chat instead on here

[Joel]: You just wake up too easily

[Jimmy]: Not my fault my ringtone is so loud

[Joel]: Then change it

[Jimmy]: ...

how did I not think of that before

[Joel]: HAHA

Let's all laugh at Jimmy

He doesn't know how to change his ringtone

[Grian]: ha

[Joel]: ...

you know it really isn't the same when there are only two people laughing

Chapter Text

[Grian] renamed [COOL PEOPLE] to [Flying Pigs]

[Grian]: That's better

[Jimmy]: NO

I LIKED COOL PEOPLE

CHANGE IT BACK

[Jimmy] renamed [Flying Pigs] to [COOL PEOPLE]

[Grian]  renamed [COOL PEOPLE] to [Flying Pigs]

[Grian]: No

[Skizz]: Oh hi

New name?

[Jimmy]: Grian changed it and wouldn't let me change it back

[Joel]: Ha

[Lizzie]: I personally like Flying Pigs better

[Jimmy]: That's because you guys are obsessed with it

[Grian]: HEY

STOP BADMOUTHING ME WHILE I'M RIGHT HERE

[Joel]: yeah Jimmy

That's so mean

#meanjimmy

[Grian]: #meanjimmy

[Lizzie]: #meanjimmy

[Skizz]: #meanjimmy

[Bdubs]: #meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: ok

[Gem]: hi

oh

#meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: Grian, Etho, Joel

[Joel]: yeah?

[Martyn]: #meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: I'm starting to see what u mean when u say this is annoying

[Impulse]: #meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: I feel targeted

[Cleo]: #meanjimmy

[Joel]: It's ur own fault rlly

[Peal]: #meanjimmy

[Scott]: #meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: ...

[Mumbo]: you know this chat just loves doing #s huh

#meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: fair point

"Is everyone here?" Grian clapped his hands together. "Ren's helping us today! We can put two people in the ship now!"

"I'll go," Joel offered. "That looked fun yesterday."

"It really wasn't," Etho said, still a bit dizzy.

"Aww, you loved it really," Grian said, elbowing Etho. "Admit it."

"Yup," Scar said. "Etho can go with Joel still. He's not that good at using the fishing rod."

"What was that?" Etho demanded. "I'm great with the fishing rod!"

"Don't make me go on that thing again," Scar pleaded to Etho in a whisper. "I'm still really nauseous." Etho threw his hands up into the air.

"Well, so am I!"

"You guys ready?" Grian asked, his hand tight around the launch button as everyone else settling in their places, gripping their fishing rods which were all attached to the boat.

"Yup!" Joel called. Etho's head was buried in his hands.

"Then we're launching in three... two... one... take off!" Everyone reeling in their fishing rods at the same time while Grian smashed his hand down onto the button with no mercy. This was always his favorite part. He loved pressing buttons.

Inside the boat-ship-submarine-rocket-thing, as Joel liked to call it, or the BSSRT, (Joel though BSSRT sounded a lot like DESSERT so he liked the name), Joel immediately started screaming. He gripped Etho's arm as they shot into the air.

They went even higher than Scar did yesterday, and Etho was already looking woozy while Joel screamed some more. When they landed back in Etho's backyard, Joel stepped out the the boat absolutely unfazed, even though Etho had to hold onto him as they walked.

"Amazing," Joel told Grian when he joined them again. "I loved it!"

"You were screaming through the whole thing," Etho managed to gasp out.

"No I wasn't," Joel denied. "That must of been you!"

"You do look a bit sick," Grian said. "You should sit down." Then, he turned to rest of the people. "Everyone," he shouted. "We're back to one person ship rides! Etho needs to rest!"

"Aww," Lizzie compained. "I wanted to go together!"

"Ha!" Joel called, already hooking his fishing rod back onto the empty machine. "We're the only boat duo in town! The boat boys!" He hollered at everyone as he climbed the scaffolding one-handed.

Etho just sat on the ground, looking sick.

They ran only two more tests before they perfected the machine.

The second run, Lizzie had boarded the flying pig and went even higher than Joel and Etho. She came back down spewing stories about stars.

It was then when Grian decided he wanted to try.

"Give the button to someone else, then," Mumbo told him, but Grian still clutched the button protectively.

"No way," Grian said, shaking his head. "That's the best part. If I give it to Jimmy, or Scar, or Joel, or even you everyone will probably mess it up."

"Hey!" Joel called from somewhere. Above him, maybe. "I detest that remark!"

"Then give it to someone you trust," Mumbo said, sighing. Etho was back on his feet again, so they were back to two-people rides.

"Fine," Grian grumbled. "Here you go."

"Aww," Mumbo said, smiling. "I promise I won't mess it up."

Grian ended up going with Scar. Unfortunately, Grian was sure Mumbo had messed it up somehow because he did not see stars and either that, or Lizzie was lying. He and Scar had sat in the ship peacefully until they went above the clouds. Then, Scar had started looking a bit uncomfortable and clutched Grian's arm.

"you okay?" Grian asked as they started to fall.

"Just a bit scared of heights," he replied, still clutching Grian's arm.

And Grian couldn't bring himself to care.

And maybe he even liked it.

(Though he would deny it if you asked, so DON'T ASK.)

[Grian]: haha

now we can brag to the amusement park that we are better than them

[Etho]: I didn't know that was your goal here

[Grian]: nah

it's just cool that we can do that now

[Lizzie]: <3 gotta love the Flying Pig Ship!

[Joel]: We should name the ship "Pig me up"

[Jimmy]: JOEL NO

I drew the pig I should get naming rights

[Joel]: Too bad

I already named him

[Jimmy]: Now I'm sad

[Grian]: Aww Joel you've made Jimmy sad now

#sadjimmy

#meanjoel

[Joel]: #sadjimmy

[Jimmy]: #meanjoel

[Lizzie]: You have put me in a dilemma

I don't know which one to post

#sadjimmy

or

#meanjoel

[Joel]: #sadjimmy pls

[Jimmy]: NO DO #meanjoel!!!

[Lizzie]: how 'bout neither

[Joel]: ...

[Jimmy]: ...

[Grian]: ...

just do both

[Lizzie]: ok!

#sadjimmy

#meanjoel

[Joel]: NOOOOOOOO

[Jimmy]: NOOOOOOOOO

[Grian]: haha

I luv this group chat

[Jimmy]: Grian I SWEAR you were talking about hating this group chat just yesterday

[Grian]: rlly?

I have no idea what ur talking about

[Joel]: ha

#shorttermmemorygrian

[Jimmy]: #shorttermmemorygrian

[Lizzie]: #shorttermmemorygrian

[Grian]: thank goodness no one else is online

[Scar]: #shorttermmemorygrian

[Mumbo]: #shorttermmemorygrian

[Gem]: #shorttermmemorygrian

[Grian]: I HATE THIS GROUP CHAT

[Grian]: We're going back to school in

wait

5 hours

[Jimmy]: dude

why are you texting at 3 in the morning

AGAIN

[Grian]: I thought u changed ur ringtone

[Jimmy]: I can't

it won't let me

:'(

[Joel]: ha

#stupidjimmy

[Grian]: #stupidjimmy

[Jimmy]: :'(

[Joel]: guess we're back to this

#sadjimmy

[Grian]: oh yeah :D

that!

#sadjimmy

[Jimmy]: you guys are so mean I swear

[Joel]: aww, but you love us really!

We're the bad boys!

Chapter Text

[Grian]: Help

this class is so awkward

we're learning about soulmates

I'm dying

[Jimmy]: What class is this

[Grian]: health

we're in the auditorium

I have to be really careful not to be caught

already five kids have had their phones confiscated

[Jimmy]: I didn't know there were so many bad boys in this school

[Joel]: JIMMY NO

WE'RE THE ONLY BAD BOYS

EVERYONE ELSE ARE JUST IN THE "we get caught squad"

[Grian]: Joel

you also got caught

[Joel]: WE SHALL IGNORE THAT FACT

[Scott]: ha

no

[Joel]: GASP

Scott

I know for a fact that you have PE at the moment

[Jimmy]: how do you even smuggle your phone onto the field

[Scott]: dude

Jimmy

look outside a window

[Jimmy]: why

...

OH

IT'S RAINING

[Joel]: YOU DIDN'T KNOW

HAHAHAHAHA

[Grian]: see

I'm not the clueless one

I knew it was raining

[Joel]: are u sure

[Grian]: YES I'M SURE

[Jimmy]: That still doesn't explain how you smuggled a phone into PE

[Scott]: We're all in the gym rn

only one class is playing dodgeball at a time

It's fairly easy honestly

everyone else is paying attention to the game

[Joel]: huh

I should try that sometime

[Jimmy]: what if it's your turn to play

[Scott]: ...

oh shoot

I don't have anywhere to keep my phone

THE UNIFORMS DON'T EVEN HAVE POCKETS

HELP

I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE IT IN THE BLEACHERS IT'LL GET STOLEN

HELP

HELP

[Joel]: Scott's panicking

[Scott]: YES I'M PANICKING

[Grian]: do u have any friends in other classes

that u can give ur phone to

[Scott]: there's Shubble

I'll give it to her

ok bye

I have to play

[Grian]: bye!

[Jimmy]: bye?

[Joel]: Jimmy, really

was the question mark necessary?

[Jimmy]: I'm really confused rn

[Joel]: ha

that's a u problem honestly

Grian was seriously hating this class. He sat next to Scar, and even though Grian though soulmates were cool and interesting, learning about them in a room full of strangers AND your best friend wasn't Grian's ideal way to go about things.

The whole class went sort of like this:

Teacher: blah blah blah soulmates soulmates soulmates

Scar: Look! I make a paper airplane!

Grian: Where did you even get the paper

Scar: Aren't you going to say the paper airplane is amazing?

Grian, rolling his eyes: Yeah yeah, It's amazing.

Teacher: Grian! Scar! Pay ATTENTION!

Class: *Snickers*

Grian: *is sad*

Teacher: AS I WAS SAYING

Teacher: Only some people have soulmates

Grian, thinking: Oh. Maybe that's why Gem and Mumbo don't care.

Teacher: Around only a fourth of the human population has a soulmate

Scar: Look! I drew a jellie!

Teacher: Soulmates are usually romantic, but occasionally are platonic

Scar: GRIAN. LOOK AT THE JELLIE.

Teacher: SCAR, GRIAN, stop talking and PAY ATTENTION.

Class: *Snickers*

Grian: *buries his head in his hands*

Teacher: Anyway, soulmates share eachother's pain and wounds, and sometimes even emotions.

Grian, thinking: That explains some things.

Teacher: When one soulmate dies, the other follows

Scar: SO MANY JELLIES. GRIAN, LOOK HOW MANY JELLIES I DREW!

Teacher: Scar, Grian, go to the office. And next time, try to pay attention.

When Joel attended that class, he paid absolutely no attention AT ALL.

Zero.

Nada.

None.

Nope.

Instead, he pulled out his phone and immediately started talking in the Flying Pigs group chat.

[Joel]: Hi

Is anyone online

I'm bored

[Grian]: what class r u in

[Joel]: Health

[Grian]: oh

Scar got us both kicked out of health

[Joel]: ha

you're really a bad boy, Grian

When Scott was in health class, he was a bit worried about what he learned.

A soulmate? That he couldn't choose?

What if he loved someone else?

Or he didn't love his soulmate?

What would happen then?

Pearl didn't really care about soulmates that much.

She hoped she didn't have one.

She didn't really care. Honestly, she was a lone wanderer through and through.

She didn't need a soulmate.

[Grian]: hey all

you guys want to create a card game together

it's so boring without something to do

after Flying Pigs ended

[Joel]: Sure

[Scar]: We should call it LIFE

after what you called the group chat at first

[Mumbo]: The Game of Life already exists

[Grian]: call it just LIFE then

[Mumbo]: alright

just life

Life ended up becoming a half-board game half-card game based off of hermit craft. It also had a role-playing part to it that made it even more fun. They started with Third Life. It was chaotic, fun, and honestly, everyone enjoyed it.

Then, came Last Life. Last Life was similar to Third Life, including betrayal, the boogeyman, red lives, and more. It was crazy. Everyone enjoyed it and they always came back to play even more games. The only downside was that the games were often long and everyone often had to return to whoever was hosting the party's house multiple times before they could even finish a game.

And then there was Double Life.

It was the one they were currently playing. Double Life, Grian had decided, would include soulmates. Just like they had learned in class. Many of the people had mixed feelings about this, but Grian managed to drag them into it anyway.

"Okay!" they were about to start, and Grian was in a dilemma.

To rig, or not to rig the name draws, Grian thought, staring as everyone wrote their names to be put into the hat. Grian already knew who would go well with each other, and really, this was just an excuse to pair up soulmates to get them closer. A brilliant plan made by Grian, by the way, if he thought about it.

He wouldn't, he finally decided when everyone had to draw. Let fate play it out instead.

Lizzie and Gem were both off on vacation when the played, and Mumbo had been elected as the official Watcher for the game. Bdubs went first, getting Impulse. They were already happy with the results. Next, Joel drew and got Etho. Then, Tango drew and got Jimmy, Scott got Pearl, Cleo got Martyn, Ren got BigB, and Grian.

Grian got Scar.

"Let's start!" Scar had declared the second Grian had drawn.

"Scar," have you even been paying attention to the soulmate drawing?" Grian asked as Scar immediately started to do whatever he was doing in the game.

"Oh look! An Allay!" Scar shouted as he flipped over a card. "Come here, little buddy! I think you dropped something!" he shouted.

"Scar!" Grian said, shaking his shoulder. Scar paid him no mind. "Scar, I think we're soulmates, and you're too busy chasing fairies!"

"Ha," Joel said, amused. "Tough luck, man."

"It shall be known as the Relation Ship!" Joel declared, waving his hands at the creation he made. They had introduced legos into LIFE because many of the players wanted to build structures.

"Cool," Etho said when he saw it. "Anyway, I'm going off to fight the warden."

"Eefo, NO!" Joel said. "Where'd he go? EEFO! COME BACK!"

"Who's got tough luck now," Grian said, elbowing Joel.

"Does Scar even know your soulmates yet?" Joel asked him, raising an eyebrow.

"I was just going to tell him," Grian said. "Like, right now!"

"Alright everyone!" Mumbo suddenly declared. "Let's wrap up this session!"

"Or not," Grian said, blinking.

"Oh, what wonderful timing," Joel said, relieved. "I thought Eefo was going to kill us!"

"Ha," Scar said, elbowing Joel. "And I don't even know who my soulmate in this game is yet!"

Grian face-palmed.

[Grian]: How u guys enjoying LIFE?

[Joel]: It's cool

[Scott]: I have not met my soulmate ONCE in the game.

[Cleo]: What he's trying to say is that he has declared me to become his replacement soulmate because his soulmate is gone

He's just too chicken to say it

[Scott]: Am not

[Grian]: Where even is Pearl

[Pearl]: right here

[Grian]: Ur okay with this?

[Pearl]: I don't really care

I'll just team up with Martyn now that he doesn't have a soulmate anymore

[Grian]: ok

[Jimmy]: I'm liking it so far

Wonder if it'll be as chaotic as last season this time

[Joel]: oh it will

If it won't I'll make it become as chaotic as last season

[Jimmy]: wow

[Grian]: That's just Joel being typical Joel

Anyway, enjoy the season everyone!

[Joel]: How come there's no boogeyman this time

[Jimmy]: I dunno

[Grian]: I mean, we have soulmates now

Soulmates AND the boogeyman would have been too extra, wouldn't it?

And plus we still have the red lives thing

[Joel]: True, true

We should do this again someday but as trios

We could be the bad boys

[Grian]: YEAH

BAD BOYS FOR LIFE!!!

[Tango]: I feel like every time I visit this chat again

I have missed like, half of the conversations

[Jimmy]: You have

Although a lot of these "conversations" are just me, Joel, and Grian

[Gem]: It's Joel, Grian and I, Jimmy

[Jimmy]: no one cares

This is a group chat

[Joel]: OOOOOOOOOOO

#meanjimmy

[Gem]: #meanjimmy

[Tango]: #meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: You too? Really?

[Grian]: hey guys

I'm on now

What has happened while I was gone

[Joel]: Just scroll up Grian

[Grian] ok

#meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: Everyone here is so mean

[Grian]: no, Jimmy, you got it wrong

You're the mean one

not us

#meanjimmy

[Jimmy]: I give up

Chapter Text

[Grian]: Can't host Double Life this weekend

We're going on a short road trip

[Bdubs]: I don't think we can play double life at all if someone's going solo, can we?

it would completely mess up the game

[Grian]: true

I guess we just can't play this weekend then

[Tango]: we should all get together for another hermitcraft game then

[Joel]: ooo yes let's do that

maybe then I can figure out who's killing all the horses

I mean like save some for me to kill

[Bdubs]: You're a sick man Joel

[Grian]: you still don't know?

[Joel]: We haven't played since then ok?

we've been so focused on LIFE

[Gem]: well, life is cool

I'm sad I can't join I'm still in Hawaii

[Lizzie]: I'm coming back tomorrow

Do you think I can join or does the solo thing mess things up again

[Grian]: I think if u wanted to join you would need a soulmate and Gem is still away

maybe when Gem comes back?

[Gem]: I won't be back for a while

We want to make the most of the vacation

We don't do "short" trips

[Grian]: short road trips are amazing!

you should try them sometime

[Lizzie]: I'm back!

[Joel]: you're lucky you came back on a Friday AND you don't have to attend school bc of jet lag

I am suffocating in here

[Jimmy]: Joel you're outside

you have PE right now

AGAIN, how did you sneak your phone onto the field

[Joel]: I'm just that good

[Jimmy]: It's not raining again is it

[Joel]: nah

It's all sun and shine out here

[Jimmy]: I'm pretty sure that's not a saying Joel

[Joel]: who cares

Saying no saying I can still say it

[Jimmy]: true true

[Grian]: Ooo where I am it's snowing

is it snowing over there

[Scott]: not yet

where r u?

[Grian]: west

[Scott]: Grian that isn't an answer

[Grian]: it is an answer

[Scott]: That's not what I meant and u know it

[Grian]: I dunno ok

I have absolutely no idea where we are except that it's snowing

[Scott]: ...

open up maps on your phone

[Grian]: why

[Scott]: to check where u are?

[Grian]: what if I don't want to

my phone's on 34%

[Scott]: Grian I doubt that your phone will die just bc u opened maps

plus ur texting rn

that's probably eating up all ur battery

[Grian]: good point

goodbye then

[Scott]: rlly?

ok

bye

[Joel]: Weird conversation

Just came on

Grian share ur location so we can see where u r

[Scott]: Grian isn't online anymore

[Grian]: I'm back

[Scott]: dude it's been like

2 seconds

[Grian]: so?

[Scott]: what about ur battery

[Grian]: oh it's fine

it's at 27%

[Scott]: GRIAN

that's like 7% less than a minute ago!!!

[Joel]: ha

Grian ur phone hates u

[Grian]: :'(

[Pearl]: Who's house r we playing at

[Lizzie]: we should play in a coffee shop

it would be aesthetic

[Scar]: I don't think a coffee shop would appreciate a bunch of teenagers taking up space and screaming about fishing

[Skizz]: No Grian's not here this time there wouldn't be any screaming about fishing

[Gem]: ARGG you guys are having so much fun over there

[Joel]: Gem ur in Hawaii

how r u not having fun

[Gem]: I mean I'm having fun

just ur also having fun

[Cleo]: wow

Gem, ur a menace

[Gem]: thank you

[Etho]: I think only Grian's having a bad time

Grian is it still snowing where u are

[Scott]: I think Grian's phone is dead

[Joel]: ah yes

#grianhasabadphone

[Scott]: that's an interesting one

I agree though

#grianhasabadphone

[Etho]: #grianhasabadphone

[Gem]: we're doing this again?

we do this a lot really

and this time Grian's not even here to see us spam the #s

[Joel]: true

kinda pointless if Grian doesn't see it really

[Grian]: I'M BACK

I swear this will take a few hours to send

so Imma just say outright that WE ARE TRAPPED ON THE HIGHWAY

stupid avalanche here

this was sent at 10 in the morning btw

so you can get an idea of how long it took to send

[Tango]: wow

It's 4 in the afternoon

[Joel]: Grian has a slow phone I guess

#grianhasabadphone

[Gem]: that # is starting to make more and more sense

#grianhasabadphone

[Joel]: ikr

[Scar]: is no one else worried about the fact that Grian is stuck in an avalanche

[Scott]: no

not IN an avalanche

just stuck BECAUSE of an avalanche

[Scar]: not a big difference

[Etho]: there is though

if Grian was stuck in an avalanche we would all be screaming and freaking our head off

Grian would likely also be dead

[Scar]: great now I have an image of a dead Grian and screaming people in my head

[Gem]: don't we all

[Scott]: no

I don't

[Joel]: u know Gem that was a weird sentence

I'm tempted to call u #weirdgem rn

[Gem]: Joel

u just did

[Jimmy]: Joel's just like that

sneaking an insult into an apology

[Etho]: ha

[Joel]: That's me!

A bad boy!

"I'm going to pay attention this time to catch the horse slaughterer!" Joel declared as they sat down and started shuffling the cards.

"It's taking you an awful long time to figure that out," Jimmy said, leaning back into his chair. "You know, this is so much more organized than Grian's mess of a house. All he has are a lot of couches and couches and more couches." They were playing at Martyn's house this time, and all of them were sitting in a semi-circle around a white table. "I hate his couches. They're too squishy."

"Jimmy," Joel deadpanned. "You spent your whole time at Grian's house sitting in his couches."

"What else was I supposed to do?" Jimmy protested. "Sit on the ground?"

Joel, unfortunately, did not catch the horse slaughterer.

"You really do need to pay more attention," Pearl said after Joel banged his head on the table for missing it. "It has happened two times already in this one game."

"It isn't as bad as when someone was stealing all those doors," Scar said. "Who did that?" From the other side of the table, Mumbo snickered. "It wasn't you, was it, Mumbo?"

"No," he laughed. "But I know who did it."

"Who?" Scar demanded. "I swear when I find out who was responsible-"

"I'm not telling you," Mumbo said, amused. "That would ruin the whole point, wouldn't it?"

[Mumbo] --> [Grian]

[Mumbo]: Scar's on to u

He's figuring out who's stealing the doors

[Grian]: ur the one who made me participate in hermit challenges

[Mumbo]: ehh

it was funny

are u still stuck?

[Grian]: kinda

the snow storm knocked down a few traffic lights but they cleared the avalanche

we're in a city now so the internet's better but the traffic is terrible

[Mumbo]: aww sorry

gtg it's my turn in hermitcraft

[Grian]: you better not tell Scar I stole his doors or I'll kill you

"Are any of you guys cold?" Scar said, shivering.

"No?" Impulse said, confused. "Are you?"

"It's freezing where I am," Scar said.

"Scar," Cleo rolled her eyes. "We're all sitting in the same room. Your side of the table isn't any colder than my side of the table."

"Maybe it's your soulmate," Etho suggested.

"Oh yeah," Mumbo said. "I forgot to mention that Grian texted. He said the avalanche was cleared but traffic where he is is terrible and a snowstorm is still going on."

"You don't think Grian's your soulmate, do you?" Jimmy asked, more as a joke. Scar, however, raised his eyebrows in interest.

"Maybe," he muttered. "Though not likely."

[Joel]: Let's all stay up til' 3 and chat to annoy Jimmy

[Jimmy]: NO

DON'T DO THAT

[Grian]: I'll do it

[Gem]: I'll be awake anyway time differences woo!

[Etho]: Well I'll be asleep

[Scott]: I mean I need to sleep

I don't think I would be able to stay awake that long

[Joel]: Set an alarm

[Jimmy]: DON'T DO THAT

I DO NOT WANT TO WAKE UP AT 3 BECAUSE SOME IDIOTS THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY

[Joel]: Aww we're not idiots :'(

[Gem]: Yeah Jimmy

[Jimmy]: pls just go to sleep

It's already half-past 10

[Joel]: Jimmy

I have already CLEARLY stated that 10 is not my bedtime

I have also already CLEARLY stated that I shall stay awake until 3 to annoy u

[Jimmy]: I give up

u guys are crazy

goodnight

I'm muting my phone

[Joel]: no don't do that :'(

what if Tango dies in the middle of the night and u have ur phone muted

[Jimmy] WHY would u even come up with such a senario

[Joel] whispers to 15 others: SOULMATES

[Grian] whispers to 15 others: ikr

[Jimmy]: Joel?

Everyone?

Why r u so quiet all of a sudden

hello?

[Joel]: absolutely nothing

we were definitely not talking about you and tango

[Jimmy]: Me and Tango?

[Gem]: TANGO AND I, JIMMY

[Jimmy]: I don't care about grammar

what I do care about is why Joel is talking about me and Tango

[Gem]: TANGO AND I

[Grian]: GREAT JOB COVERING UP, JOEL

[Joel]: not like u would do any better

u would prob punctuate ur sentences

[Grian]: I DO NOT DO THAT!!!!!

[Jimmy]: guys why were u talking about me a tango

[Gem]: TANGO AND I

[Joel]: You definitely DO do that

[Grian]: I DO NOT!!!!!

[Jimmy]: Stop ignoring me and answer the question!!!

[Tango]: Why are u guys texting at this hour

just why

[Jimmy]: TANGO SCROLL UP

AND GET THEM TO LISTEN TO ME

[Tango]: ?

[Joel]: #grianpunctuateshissentenceswhenheisfeelingawkward

[Gem]: That's abnormally long but I'll do it anyway

#grianpunctuateshissentenceswhenheisfeelingawkward

[Tango]: oh

u know what I'mma just leave I don't want to deal with this rn

guys it's 11

[Jimmy]: IT'S ALREADY AN HOUR PAST MY BEDTIME

[Joel]: Jimmy you sleep too early

[Jimmy]: NO I DON'T

NOW SHUT UP AND GO TO SLEEP

GOODNIGHT

BYE

Chapter Text

[Grian]: ARRRGGGGG

IT'S STILL SNOWING WHERE I AM

[Bdubs]: Aww sorry to hear

[Impulse]: It's started snowing lightly over here too

[Jimmy]: No it's not?

[Cleo]: Ha Jimmy I think u and Impulse live on the opposite side of the city

[Jimmy]: Are our houses rlly that far apart?

We go to the same school though

[Pearl]: Maybe it's the only public school in the area?

[Bdubs]: I think so

The next on is like four miles away from where I live

[Pearl]: Huh

That's interesting

[Grian]: Can we get back to how I'm suffering rn?

[Cleo]: Nah

Grian no one wants to hear about u getting snowed on

I bet in a few minutes everyone will be getting snowed on

[Jimmy]: It's snowing!

[Scott]: Jimmy It's been snowing for everyone else for like half an hour already

[Jimmy]: Well it's snowing at my house now

[Scar]: I'm sick of the snow already

It's so cold

Jimmy ur lucky u got snowed on last

[Jimmy]: Snow is cool!

I like being snowed on

[Scar]: Well I don't

Imma move to a desert if I could

Much nicer than this stupid weather

[Grian]: I'm going to have to agree with u there

Snow is stupid

We finally got settled into a motel

AND IT'S STILL SNOWING

[Lizzie]: oooo

Let's all meet up and make snow angels

[Scott]: Sounds cool

Where

[Etho]: I dunno about the rest of u but I don't rlly want to get snow in my hair

[Joel]: Etho ur hair is white

No one would be able to tell

[Etho]: That's not the point

The point is it would be wet and cold

[Gem]: Where I am it's sunny all day

[Scar]: I envy u Gem

[Jimmy]: Scar I am tired of the snow now

I'm going to go join u in ur desert home now

[Joel]: Jimmy it's only been 2 hours

[Jimmy]: In 2 hours it can grow very cold

[Scar]: I agree

In only 2 minutes it can grow very cold too

[Lizzie]: Are u guys gonna join us to make snow angels?

[Scott]: yeah join us

[Grian]: If u make a snow angel where I am u would get buried under 10 feet of snow

[Jimmy]: Yes Grian we all know ur suffering

[Grian]: Thank you for acknowledging that!

I shall go now

bye

[Joel]: That was all it took to get him to stop talking about snow?

[Grian]: I SHALL STILL TALK ABOUT SNOW JOEL

JUST LATER

and bye again

[Grian]: AAAAAAAA WHY IS IT SO COLD

[Mumbo]: ?

[Grian]: IT FEELS LIKE SOMEONE DUMPED SNOW ON ME

[Mumbo]: Hmm I'll ask

@Scar

Did u fall in snow?

[Grian]: why u asking Scar if he fell in snow

[Joel]: Oh he fell in snow alright

tried to climb a tree bc Cleo dared him to

I saw the whole thing

Hilarious

[Grian]: why r we talking about Scar rn??????????

[Mumbo]: Bc we think ur soulmates

[Grain]: we r soulmates

[Mumbo]: No not in LIFE

in REAL life

[Grian]: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[Joel]: Mumbo I think u broke Grian

Hey Grian do u feel warmer yet

Martyn got Scar some towels

[Mumbo]: I really think I broke him

It's been a minute since u asked that question

[Grian]: I'M ALIVE

[Mumbo]: Oh good

I was definitely thinking that u had died

[Grian]: Hmm I do feel warmer

this is a very big discovery

I shall now conduct a science experiment to test it

[Mumbo]: GRIAN NO

DO NOT PURPOSELY HURT YOURSELF

[Grian]: why not

just a paper cut would be fine

[Mumbo]: Just no

Grian self-harm is not a science experiment

plus it would hurt Scar too

[Grian]: that's the whole point

[Joel]: Grian what Mumbo is trying to say is that he cares about u and doesn't want u to get hurt

[Grian]: oh

then how am I supposed to be sure????

[Joel]: I could push Scar so he falls into the snow again

[Mumbo]: JOEL NO

It's hopeless why r u guys like this

[Grian]: Honestly I think I may not make it back to school in time

School starts so soon and we are STILL TRAPPED on a SNOWY HIGHWAY

IT'S SO STUPID AT THIS POINT

[Joel]: This is so unfair

First Lizzie

then Gem

and now u

WHY CAN'T I BE THE ONE TO TRAVEL AND SKIP SCHOOLLLLLLLL

[Grian]: Ha

I'm just cooler than u

and so are Gem and Lizzie

[Joel]: The universe is so unfair

[Jimmy]: AGAIN???

WHY R U GUYS TEXTING AT 3 IN THE MORNING AGAIN???

[Joel]: No Jimmy ur wrong

[Grian]: yeah Jimmy

It's 2 in the morning this time

[Jimmy]: THAT'S EVEN WORSE

WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME I SWEAR

ONE MORE TIME I AM ACTUALLY MUTING THE CHAT

[Grian] whispers to [Joel]: Joel help

Bring up Tango smoothly to get him to not mute the chat

[Joel] whispers to [Grian]: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT

YOU DO IT

[Grian] whispers to [Joel]: HOW

[Joel] whispers to [Grian]: I DUNNO U TELL ME

[Jimmy]: ...

you guys are ominously quiet

what r u guys planning

world domination?

[Grian] whispers to [Joel]: SEE

NOW U MADE HIM SUSPICIOUS

[Joel] whispers to [Grian]: NO THIS IS UR FAULT

[Jimmy]: guys?

u know what I'm going to sleep

this is pointless

[Joel]: Aww u always say that

[Grian]: yeah Jimmy

[Jimmy]: why do u guys always come back when I'm gonna go to sleep

[Joel]: We're just like that :D

Get used to it!

[Joel]: IT'S NOT FAIRRRRRRRRR

GRIAN U GOT TO SKIP SCHOOL

[Grian]: Ha

[Lizzie]: oooo

I just had a cool idea

what if after school we tried to do flying pigs but in the snow

[Cleo]: Sounds cool

Who's house

[Lizzie]: Whoever has the most snow in their backyard

[Scar]: ooo I do

I fell into it remember

[Cleo]: I do remember

You were shivering for DAYS

[Joel]: yeah

AND Grian felt cold

[Scar]: what?

[Cleo]: ooo

Joel I think ur on to something

[Lizzie]: Honestly at this point I think Scar's always cold

[Grian]: wait

I probs won't be back to do flying pigs with u guys either

NOOOOOOOOOO

[Joel]: Ha

Someone else'll have to press the button

[Grian]: THAT'S EVEN WORSE

DON'T DO IT WITHOUT ME PLEASEEEEEE

[Joel]: This is payback for skipping school

[Scar]: ooo can I press the button

[Grian]: NO WAIT

[Lizzie]: What about Mumbo?

He pressed it last time

[Grian]: LISTEN TO ME

[Joel]: Don't u also wanna press it?

[Lizzie]: Not really

But I could

[Grian]: STOP THIS CONVERSATION RIGHT NOW

STOP

[Scar]: I still wanna press the button

[Grian]: THIS INSTANT

I WILL IGNORE U FOR LIFE IF U DON'T STOP

[Joel]: Ha

Nah

I'll be ok

[Cleo]: Hmm no one else is really online

[Joel]: I think everyone else is in class

U have free period?

[Cleo]: Yup

and Joel, u have class too

[Joel]: Who cares

So rn it's just me, you, Grian, Lizzie, and Scar

[Lizzie]: Yup!

[Grian]: THE BETRAYAL

I DIDN'T KNOW U GUYS VALUED MY FRIENDSHIP SO LITTLE

[Joel]: ooo

u actually managed to spell betrayal right this time

[Grian]: THAT WAS THAT ONE TIME

[Cleo]: If it happened once it could happen twice

[Lizzie]: I'll get the message out

4 pm sound good?

[Joel]: I'm in

[Cleo]: So am I

[Grian]: WELL I'M NOT

[Lizzie]: Scar?

...

[Joel]: Scar?

u still online???

[Cleo]: oOoOoOoOoOoOo

Grian threatened to ignore us all for life remember

I think Scar went offline to avoid that

[Joel]: THIS IS GREAT BLACKMAILING INFORMATION

AS WELL AS GOSSIP

WE BE GOSSIPING ABOUT GRIAN AND SCAR OVER HERE

[Lizzie]: I ship <3

[Grian]: I AM RIGHT HERE

although I am happy at least SOMEONE values my friendship enough to stop texting

[Cleo]: but it's more than friendship now

[Grian]: CLEO

[Joel]: ooo Grian's flustered

#flusteredgrian

At least he's not punctuating his sentences yet

[Grian]: I STILL DON'T DO THAT

[Joel]: Denial is a river in egypt

[Lizzie]: I never did understand that saying

Is denial rlly a river in Egypt???

[Cleo]: nah

It's just "The Nile" distorted

[Lizzie]: OH

that makes so much more sense

[Cleo]: Glad to help!

Chapter Text

[Skizz]: How does getting together for a game of LIFE sound

[Mumbo]: Sounds great

When?

[Skizz]: What about now

Can u guys come over

[Lizzie]: GUYS

I CODED LIFE

IT TOOK FOREVER

BUT I DID IT

[Grian]: Hold up u WHAT????

[Lizzie]: I coded LIFE :D

Here I'm going to send u a link

[Grian]: HOW

[Lizzie]: Well, I couldn't join

So I spent all the time u guys spent playing coding

It took very long but it was worth it

It's online too so we can all play at our own homes

[Grian]: THIS IS SO COOL

Lizzie, this almost makes up for u shipping me and Scar together

[Pearl]: Hi! Lizzie, I shall join u on ur scarian shipping adventure

[Lizzie]: Great! The more the merrier

[Grian]: PEARL NOT U TOOOOOOO

[Scar]: Why am I only hearing about this now

Why am I being shipped

[Gem]: What is shipping

[Bdubs]: err

well

It's when you

uh

[Grian]: Normally I'd laugh but I have trouble describing it too

[Bdubs]: It's when u ship two people romantically together

[Gem]: oh ok

So why r we shipping Grian and Scar together?

[Grian]: THERE IS NO "WE"

IT'S JUST LIZZIE AND PEARL BEING WEIRD

[Lizzie]: I like being weird :)

[Gem]: Actually there is a "we" now

[Grian]: NOT U TOO

[Gem]: Yes me too

[Grian]: ALL THE BETRAYALS

YOU GUYS ARE SO MEAN

[Skizz]: Can we get back to the part where Lizzie said she coded LIFE???

[Lizzie]: Oh yeah

I sent the link out

You can try now if u want

Just call everyone into a group chat

[Grian]: Doing that now :D

"Haha!" Joel declared. "I have rebuilt the Relation Ship!"

"Wow," Etho said. "It looks much better in Lizzie's game than it does in real life."

"Are you insulting my amazing building skills?" Joel demanded.

"I would never," Etho denied. Joel gave him a calculating look followed by a suspicious look that ended with a glare. Even if they weren't in the same room, Joel could certainly spam emojis at Etho in the game. A genius design made by Lizzie, by the way.

"We should all come up with names," Impulse suggested.

"Oh yeah," Grian said. "Good idea."

"We're the Boat Boys!" Joel declared. "First Flying Pigs, now the Relation Ship!"

"Alright," Grian said. "I'll write it down."

"The Ranchers," Jimmy suggested for him and Tango.

"I like it," Tango agreed. Jimmy sent a happy emoji in the game. (Everyone would later thank Lizzie for the great addition. After all, everyone loves emojis).

"The Homewreckers!" Bdubs volunteered for him and Impulse. They got along amazingly.

"Alright," Grian said, looking thoughtful. "Hey Scar, want to be the Desert Duo V.2?"

"YES PLEASE," Scar said. "Even if it's just in the game, the desert is still WAY better than the stinking snow," he pouted.

"Ha," Grian laughed. "I heard you fell in it!"

"And I heard you were cold," Cleo countered. "I think Scott, Pearl, Martyn and I should be the Divorce Quartet or Divorcee Gang or whatever."

"Interesting," Scott said. "But also accurate."

"I'm fine with whatever," Pearl said, shrugging.

"I'll go with it," Martyn said.

"Ooo," Joel suddenly interjected. "We could also call me and Etho "Smalletho"! Like, we can be Boat Boys, and Boat Gang, and Smalletho, and the Rocket Boys, and-"

"We get it," Grian said, amused. "You are the Boat Boys, Gang, Smalletho, and Rocket Boys."

"We could also be the Power Couple," Impulse said.

"Ooo, I like that," Bdubs agreed. "The Homewreckers and the Power Couple."

"Horse Bros for us," Ren and BigB said together.

"Great!" Grian cheered. "We all have names now!"

"I want to get back to feeding my Jellies," Scar said. "Look how cute she is! Oh who's a cute Jelly, you are!"

"Scar," Grian sighed, exsasperated. "Please leave your Jelly talk off mic."

"Whatever you want," Scar said, spamming shrugging emojis.

"Ship," Gem whispered to Pearl and Lizzie.

"Ship," they agreed.

"I CAN STILL HEAR YOU!"

"Well, I'm off to fight the warden for real this time," Etho said, throughing out there one second and disappearing the next.

"AGAIN?" Joel demanded, exasperated. "Didn't you already do that the first time?"

"Yeah, but for real this time," Etho grumbled. "Mumbo ended the session on me."

"Oh yeah," Joel agreed. "That did happen."

A while later, Etho shouted an "Oh my," sounding a bit panicked.

"You okay?" Joel called.

"There are five wardens here!" Etho said, sounding WAY too calm in the context he was in.

"WHAT?" Joel said. "Eefo, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

On Etho's side of the story, he was listening to Bdubs scream "SHIFT! SHIFT!"

Yeah, Etho wasn't worried.

[Joel]: Lizzie, I luv ur game

[Lizzie]: Aww thx! <3

[Pearl]: It truly is amazing

Sorry u couldn't join this time

[Lizzie]: It's okay

I like coding anyway

Hey, @Grian, can u possibly send over ur ideas for future LIFE games?

I could code them now that I'm done coding Double LIFE

[Grian]: u sure?

We could all play the original next season

[Lizzie]: It's no problem

It's a hobby, not a chore

[Grian]: Alright!

But don't spoil it for anyone else

I want it to be a suprise!

[Jimmy]: Who wants to go to the arcade and hang out

[Grian]: I'm in

[Joel]: Me too

[Scott]: Honestly I think everyone's in

[Impulse]: Yup

[Scar]: I'm coming!

[Lizzie]: Okay what about this

Everyone who wants to come meet up at the arcade in 15 minutes

[Bdubs]: Omw now!

"Okay," Grian said. "So, I think we should all buy, like, one to two-hundred credits and meet up around two hours later. How does that sound?

"What?" Scar asked, who hadn't been paying attention. He had just shoved all his life savings into a machine and marveled as it spit out a card at him. "Look!" he declared, brandishing the card. "I have a thousand credits on this card!"

"Scar," Grian muttered, his head in his hand. "Why would you do that?"

"Why not?" Scar said, shrugging.

"How are you even going to afford school lunch now?" Grian asked.

"Uhh," Scar mumbled. "I dunno, honestly. Maybe I'll go get a job or something."

"Well," Cleo said, poking the machine. "I'm going to be sensible and only buy a hundred credits."

"I might only buy fifty," Etho paced around a machine and checked the prices.

"Etho, you would barely be able to play like, ten games with that," Joel said, rolling his eyes.

"Hmm, good point."

"I think we should play in pairs," Impulse suggested. "I mean, a lot of the games are two player after all."

"Also a good point," was Etho's answer to that.

"Alright," Grian said. "LIFE soulmates, anyone? Lizzie, I think you could go with Mumbo for this."

"Alright," Lizzie said while she fumbled with the machine. "A little help here? I want to buy a hundred and fifty credits but it won't let me."

"I'll help," Joel offered. They both toyed around with the machine for a bit before it finally spit out two cards in their faces.

"Two?" Lizzie complained. "I only need one. Hey, Joel, do you want this?"

"Sure," Joel said. "Here." He handed Lizzie some money to pay for it. "Aww, only a hundred-fifty? I wanted two hundred-fifty!"

"Too bad," Jimmy said, walking up to the machine. "My turn."

[Gem]: Hi

What r u guys doing?

[Jimmy]: Oh hi

We're at the arcade

I'm taking a break with Tango rn

We got some drinks

[Gem]: There's an arcade in town???

[Tango]: No

Next town over

It's pretty big too

[Gem]: We have an arcade over here too

But the credits are rlly expensive

[Tango]: I think they're pretty cheap over here

Jimmy wants to play another game gtg

bye

[Gem]: Bye!

[Grian]: Hey everyone!

Me and Scar found a great VR experience

Two player

It's at the back of the archade

Bit expensive though it's 26 credits

[Joel]: ooo sounds fun

Has anyone else done it?

[Bdubs]: Me and Impulse did

It was great

Simulation of a rollercoaster

[Joel]: I'm in

dragging Etho other there rn

"It's that one I think," Joel said, glancing at his phone. "Yup. That's the one!" He then proceeded to drag Etho over to the arcade and swipe both their cards.

INSUFFICIANT FUNDS the computer screen screamed when Etho swiped his card.

"I'm out," he said.

"I told you you should have bought more credits!" Joel threw his hands in the air.

"I did," Etho protested. "One hundred!"

"I still have like, forty credits left," Joel said. "I could swipe my card for you."

"Really?" Etho raised his eyebrows. "You'd do that? You don't have to."

"Nah," Joel said, swiping his card. "I wanna see what the others are so excited about." Etho gave him a grateful look before putting the VR set on.

"How many credits do you even have left?" Grian said, motioning at Scar's card.

"So many," he said, swiping it for a claw machine. "Look, I'll get parrot plushie this time."

"You've been playing this for almost an hour!" Grian protested. "I'm tempted to abandon you for flappy bird!"

"Wait, don't go!" Scar said, his eyes still focused on the claw. "Look! I almost have it!" Just then, Pearl came walking over, waving.

"Hi Grian!" she said. "Ooo, claw machines? What's the one Scar's doing?"

"Birds," Grian said. "He's trying to win the parrot for me."

"Ooo," Pearl said, a glint in her eyes. "So romantic." Grian went red.

"Pearl!" he said, whacking her arm. Just then, Scar shouted a "YES!" followed by a "Nooooooooooo-"

"What happened?" Grian said, looking over. The parrot was just hanging over the edge of the winning box.

"WHYYYYYYYY," Scar complained. "WHYYYYYYYYY CAN'T I JUST GET THE PARROT?"

"I'm telling you it's rigged," Grian said. "I think all of them are rigged except that candy one over there-"

"WHYYYYYYYY," Scar continued, ignoring Grian's attempted to one, calm him down, and two, talk some sense into him.

"Let me," Pearl said, swiping her card. Grian watched skeptically as Pearl grabbed the parrot. Then, his skepticism turned into confusion and then awe as the parrot dropped perfectly into the hole and out of the machine.

"Tada," Pearl said, showing off what she had won. "Here. Scar, take it." She shoved it into Scar's arms. "Give it to Grian."

"Why didn't you just give it to me in the first place?" Grian asked as Scar proudly presented the parrot to Grian again.

"Then it wouldn't be romantic," Pearl said, already starting to leave. This time, both Grian and Scar turned red with blush.

[Grian]: Look at my new parrot plushie

I named him Professor Beak!

[Grian] sent a picture

[Scar] liked a picture

[Pearl]: That was all me

I'm the queen of claw machines

[Grian]: All hail queen Pearl

For catching me a Pesky Bird

[Pearl]: You owe me a favor now

[Grian]: ?

Fine

[Pearl]: I'll tell u later

[Grian]: Hmm

Very ominous

[Pearl]: When am I not ominous hmm?

[Grian]: Fair point

Anyway, I have to stop Scar before he spends all his life savings on candy

He's using that claw machine non-stop now bc it's the only one he can actually get anything in

[Pearl]: Tell him if he wants claw machine lessons, I can give them to him

[Grian]: Nah

At this point we won't have any tickets to cash in at the end of the day

Just a bunch of candy

[Pearl]: Whatever you say

Chapter Text

[Pearl] --> [Grian] & [Scar]

[Pearl]: Grian, Scar, come over

Or, I'll come over to one of ur houses

I don't care

[Scar]: My house it fine

Jellie is sitting on me rn and I don't rlly wanna get up

[Grian]: ?

why?

[Pearl]: I'm calling in the favor

[Grian]: Hmm

Interesting favor

[Pearl]: no Grian

That's not the favor silly

But I need you and Scar together to call in the favor

[Grian]: This is getting more and more mysterious every second

omw now

[Pearl]: Great! :D

"Okay Pearl," Grian said, rubbing his eyes. He really hadn't gotten enough sleep yesterday. He and Joel had spent the whole night gossiping about Jimmy and Tango and ways to get them together. "What is the favor?"

"Where is Scar?" Pearl said instead, COMPLETELY ignoring Grian and also avoiding the question. Grian gave her a glare before he started looking around for Scar.

"I dunno," Grian said, looking puzzled. "I swear he was here a minute ago. Scar! Where are you!"

"I'm here," Scar said, poking his head out of his bedroom. "Pearl said it was best not to have Jellie in the room during the task. Also, Pearl, I do detest that remark, since Jellie certainly wouldn't get in the way if you just let her stay in the same room. She won't let go of my leg."

"I think she would get in the way," Pearl said, raising her eyebrows. "Look, Scar, I love her and all, but you would probably spend more time cooing at Jellie than actually focusing on the favor."

"Hmm," Scar said. "I will not agree with you, but I will put Jellie away." Grian and Pearl just stood there awkwardly as Scar peeled Jellie off his leg and shut the door.

"Alright," Pearl said. "Now, Grian, Scar, sit down on that couch," Pearl said, pointing to Scar's heavily beat-up couch. Likely Jellie's work.

"When did you get so bossy?" Grian joked, amused. His eyes crinkled at the edges as he tried not to laugh.

"I was always this bossy," Pearl insisted. "I just had nothing to be bossy about."

"What exactly are you being bossy about?" Scar asked, absolutely confused on why he was here in the first place. Grian owed Pearl an IOU, not Scar.

"You guys are so dense!" Pearl said, shaking her head. "Alright. Here's the favor you owe me!" She looked at Grian. "Or, it's a dare, now."

"Great," Grian deadpanned. "Well, get on with it. We've been sitting her for eternity already!"

"Kiss Scar," was Pearl's answer.

"Wha-a-what?" Grian said, at a loss for words.

"You heard me," Pearl said, tapping her shoe. "You have to kiss Scar." Grian just sat there, looking absolutely flabbergasted for a good minute.

"You're taking too long!" Pearl complained. "Scar, you do it!"

"Uhh, okay?" Scar said, before pulling Grian into a kiss. It was light, but the second their lips touched Grian absolutely just melted into Scar's arms.

"And that," Pearl said, to deaf ears, "is my cue to leave!"

Pearl thought she had done a very good job at getting Scar and Grian together. She was sure they were soulmates already; the Scar being cold incident followed by the Grian being cold incident was already proof enough.

Now, proud of her hard work and smart thinking, she grabbed her phone and texted Lizzie and Gem to make it official.

[Pearl]: Got Scar and Grian to kiss

Should only be a matter of time before they start dating now

[Lizzie]: Yay! :D

[Gem]: Now you're the queen of claw machines AND getting people together! :)

[Pearl]: :D

We should have a party to celebrate!

[Lizzie]: I'll bring the snacks!

[Gem]: You know, even though I'm back from Hawaii, I'm not sad I left!

Home is amazing!

I'm omw now!

Grian and Scar just sat on the couch for a while, hugging each other with the occasional pecks. Grian was softly smiled as he buried his face into Scar's sweater. He would have to remember to thank Pearl for this. 

Now, there was absolutely no doubt they were soulmates. When Scar and Grian had first kissed, and it was the same for every single kiss after that, Grian felt his world open, as if a part of himself had been locked away for his whole life and was finally being set free.

Life was good.

"We should definitely start getting the others together," Gem said, sipping some fruit punch. "Joel and Etho, or Jimmy and Tango?"

"What about both?" Lizzie suggested. "We can definitely multitask. See which one takes longer."

"I don't think Bdubs and Impulse need any more encouragement," Pearl commented. "They're getting along really well already."

"Agreed," Lizzie said. "You know, that's funny. Every single suspected soulmate in real life are also soulmates in LIFE." Lizzie paused. "You know, without context, that would have made no sense."

"Ha," Pearl said. "But you're right. Hmm. Do you think Grian rigged the name draws or something?"

"He was in denial about him and Scar, remember?" Gem said. "I don't think he would match himself up with Scar at that time."

"True," Lizzie said. "Well, whatever happened, I think fate is on our side!"

"It's getting late," Scar said, Grian still in his arms. They had been sitting like that for a while by now.

"Hmph," Grian mumbled into Scar's chest.

"You should be getting home," Scar continued, resting his head in Grian's hair.

"Can't I sleep over?" Grian complained, his words muffled.

"I don't have an extra bed, or sleeping bags, or-"

"Why don't you even have sleeping bags?" Grian asked.

"Well, I haven't been camping before so-"

"You haven't?" Grian looked up at Scar. "You know what, we should call everyone over tomorrow and go camping. It is a crime that you haven't camped before!"

"Aww, come on, give me a kiss before you go," Scar said, smiling, opening his arms.

Grian complied.

[Grian]: Hey everyone

Scar hasn't been camping before so who wants to come camping tomorrow

[Gem]: I would like to go but I don't have a tent

[Grian]: pls don't tell me you haven't gone camping before

[Gem]: I have

I just dunno where the tent is

It's been a while since I've been

[Joel]: I have a tent

but only one

Also

This is very important

[Joel] changed [Flying Pigs] to [Desert Duo Ship]

[Gem]: YES

JOEL

UR MY NEW BEST FRIEND

[Joel]: :D

[Grian]: I would scream at u

But me and Scar are together now

[Gem]: YESSSSSS

IT IS CANON

[Joel]: Gem

How did u learn all these terms

I swear just a few days ago u didn't know what shipping even was

[Gem]: I learn fast :)

[Grian]: This group chat is crazy

It's official

[Joel]: No

This group chat is Desert Duo Ship

not "Crazy"

[Grian]: Joel

u make sarcastic comments all the time

why can't I make them

[Joel]: I AM THE SARCASTIC KING

KING JOEL

u cannot make jokes now Grian haha

[Grian]: :(

[Gem]: Don't worry

u can still prank people

Joel isn't the king of pranks

[Grian]: :D

[Tango]: I have 2 tents

[Grian]: Hmm

How big r these tents

[Tango]: average

[Grian]: I think I have a large tent also

That's 4 tents in total

[Pearl]: Is that enough?

How many people r coming?

[Grian]: Mostly everyone

I think Ren and BigB aren't coming though

They already had plans

[Pearl]: ok

Also, I would like to say that whoever came up with the new chat name is a genius

[Grian]: I would change it but Scar thinks it's funny

[Pearl]: Did I say I am very proud of myself?

I am a certified matchmaker now

[Grian]: ok

U r a certified matchmaker now

[Pearl]: yay!

:p

[Joel]: You know

now that ur done getting Scar and Grian together

Pearl, Gem, Lizzie

who r u trying to get together now?

I feel like ur some sort of shipping trio or something

[Gem]: u know that is an interesting name

[Lizzie]: We can be the shipping trio :)

[Pearl]: u wanna know the truth?

ur next

[Joel]: :oooooooooooooo

you know I am not enjoying this conversation as much as I thought I was

[Pearl]: Oh it's fine

We're targeting Jimmy too

[Joel]: ...

That makes it better

But doesn't exactly make up for the fact that I'M NEXT

[Lizzie]: You'll get used to it :p

[Jimmy]: Wow

Interesting conversation that happened before

[Joel]: ikr

We're next, Jimmy

[Jimmy]: Does this mean I'm getting shipped with Tango again?

I thought I was safe and Grian was the victim now

[Joel]: Nope

They're back

[Jimmy]: At least I'm not the only one

They're targeting you and Etho too

[Joel]: Oh that's what they meant

[Jimmy]: Joel

That was so obvious

You and Etho have been literally dancing around each other this whole time

[Joel]: No?

We're just friends???

[Jimmy]: I mean u look like "just friends"

But you also look like "not just friends"

[Joel]: Jimmy

That made absolutely no sense

Someone cannot be just friends and not just friends at the same time

[Jimmy]: Ik

But still

U looked close

but like

closer

[Joel]: Ur crazy

I'm going to talk to someone else now

Not crazy u

[Jimmy]: Ur oblivious

[Joel]: Jimmy if I'm oblivious u live on Mars

[Jimmy]: Joel

Why r u inventing random sayings now

[Joel]: I just do that

[Jimmy]: And I'm the weird one???

[Joel]: I never said ur weird

Just crazy

[Jimmy]: ur crazy

[Joel]: GASP

ok bye

I need to talk to someone sane now

[Jimmy]: Weirdest conversation I ever had...

[Skizz]: I volunteer a beach tent

[Grian]: Uhh

I don't think that'll work

Winter is only just over

[Skizz]: It's the only thing I have!

[Grian]: We'll just squish together like sardines then

[Skizz]: I don't wanna become a fish

[Grian]: I mean it's not like we have another spare tent

Unless Gem can find her tent

[Gem]: I can try

[Grian]: ok

Another thing is sleeping bags

and camping equipment

We're gonna hike, right?

[Joel]: I hate hiking too

Grian

My stubby legs can't take it

wait

I mean my long legs

My long legs hate hiking

[Grian]: Sureeeeeeeeee

ur long legs hate hikinggggggggg

[Joel]: Exactly

[Scar]: I mean

I need to borrow a sleeping bag

[Grian]: Just buy one

[Scar]: I spent all my life savings remember?

[Grian]: ...

Oh yeah

Scar, you doofus

[Scar]: :p

[Joel]: I have an extra

[Grian]: ok

does anyone else not have a sleeping bag???

I have a flashlight and a lantern btw

Also pillows

and matches

and bug spray

[Joel]: We get it

ur a camping geek

[Grian]: ...

If we're short on supplies ur not getting any

[Joel]: :'(

I do deserve that though

[Grian]: yep

ok anyway

Is everyone good? Final?

[Lizzie]: yup

[Jimmy]: ok

[Tango]: Ready

[Joel]: u know already

[Skizz]: I'm bringing the beach tent anyway

[Grian]: Do whatever u want

[Impulse]: I'm good

I have lanterns too

[Grian]: :D

[Bdubs]: I'm excited!

[Pearl]: I'm in

[Gem]: ready!

I also have a stick

[Grian]: Why???

[Gem]: For hiking

[Grian]: A hiking stick???

[Gem]: No

Just a stick

To fight off bears

[Grian]: Gem

I don't think that's what ur supposed to do when you see a bear

[Gem]: Hmm

I'll bring it anyway

Chapter Text

"Wow!" Scar exclaimed when they reached the campsite. They were the first ones there. "This is cool!"

"There's still snow on the ground," Grian grumbled, kicking a pile.

"You're the one who wanted to go camping," Scar pointed out. "Now, how do we set up this tent?"

"Here, I'll show you," Grian said, picking up a black pole. Scar tried to pay attention, he really did, but Grian was making no sense and the poles looked the same and ooo there was a pretty bird there-

"Scar," Grian said, sidling up to him. "You didn't hear anything I just said, did you?"

"Nope," Scar said sheepishly. Grian rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. He gave Scar a small kiss and turned back to the half-built tent.

"Can you hold that bit please?" He asked, pointing to a long pole. Scar held it, watching as Grian did some sort of trick to get it to connect with the other three poles and really, nothing made sense at this point.

"Hello!" Bdubs called as he walked into the camp. "Wow! This is one large campsite!"

"I know right?" Grian said, motioning to the whole clearing. "And there's a river and a lake nearby."

"Shoulda told me," Bdubs said, still looking around. "Then I would have brought my fishing rod over."

"I think you can rent some in the check in cabin," Grian said, fumbling with some sort of nail-looking thing. "Say, are you parking or were you dropped off?"

"Parked," Bdubs said. "Wait. Does this place charge a fee for parking?"

"Yeah, it does," Grian said, finally done pounding the nail into the ground. "And you have to check in to let them know you're staying."

"Be right back!" Bdubs called, dropping his bags on a bench. "I have to go check in!"

Gem was the next to arrive. Grian was examining an old barbecue when she walked into the campsite. Scar was unpacking some snacks, and Bdubs was unfolding some clothed foldable chairs.

"Hello!" she called. "I found my tent!" she dropped her luggage onto another bench that wasn't occupied by food and Bdub's stuff. "Can we go fishing later? I brought my fishing rod!"

"Sure," Grian replied, poking the barbecue. It was a bit rusty, but it was still usable. However, Grian didn't know how to cook or grill, so he would have to leave that to someone else. Hopefully, at least one of the people in the group chat knew how to make food without setting the whole camp on fire.

"Great!" Gem declared, sitting down on one of the foldable chairs. "When are the others getting here?"

"Soon, hopefully," Grian said, stretching and leaving the barbecue. He then walked over to water spout and turned it on a few times.

"Check Desert Duo Ship," Bdubs suggested. "Someone must have texted since I left."

"Okay," Gem agreed, pulling out her phone.

[Lizzie]: We're almost there!

[Gem]: We?

[Lizzie]: Me and Joel

We were hanging out and checking out ski resorts

He hasn't skied this season yet and I want to learn

[Gem]: Ooo cool

We should all go skiing though

It's pretty late into the season already and we haven't skied

[Joel]: Ikr!

[Lizzie]: We're here!

Joel's gonna go check in

I'll join u guys

[Gem]: ok!

Soon, everyone had arrived. Some people started setting up tents, others rested in chairs and drank lemonade. Soon, however, Grian grew restless and made the others join him on a half-hiking half-fishing trip.

"Come on," Grian said, tugging on Scar's arm. He was eating a bag of chips. "Don't you want to see the river?"

"Sure," Scar mumbled, his mouth full. He shrugged and followed. Gem ran up to them and joined the party.

"Aren't you guys coming?" She called to the rest of the group. There were a few "yeah"s and a few grumbles (mainly from Joel) before they all started making their way towards the stream.

"How are you enjoying camping so far?" Grian asked Scar as them walked. Scar gave him a thumbs up, his mouth still full of chips.

"I's gweaf," he said, his mouth full. Grian laughed.

"No talking when your mouth is full, Scar," he muffled his giggles and looked around. "I think we're near the river now."

Indeed, they could all hear the loud rushing of water. Grian ran on the path and was greeted by the fast tumbling currents of a clearly flooding river. Must be the melting snow, he thought, surveying the scene.

"This is actually really cool," Joel said, hesitantly tapping a stone with his shoe. After the stone failed to shift, he jumped on. "Look at me!" He waved his arms around excitedly.

"We get it," Grian said, amused. He was laughing again. Joel hopped from one rock to another, grinning. "You know, I think someone put all these stepping stones here on purpose. Part of the forest trail, I think. A way to get to the other side." He climbed onto a particularly large boulder and continued on his way.

"Looks fun," Lizzie said, hopping onto the first rock. "Wow. This river is a lot wider than I initially thought it was."

"It's flooding season," Cleo said, examining the chain of rocks. "That looks dangerous."

"It looks cool," Scar argued, following Lizzie. She was now on the second rock and steadying herself as the water lapped at her shoes. Wearing a determined look, she slowly stepped onto the third stone, which wobbled.

"You uprooted the path," she complained at Joel.

"S'not my fault," Joel said. He was already halfway across the river.

"Joel, be careful!" Grian called. "That rock looks slippery!"

"I'll be fine," Joel said, waving him off. He stepped onto the rock and frowned. It was covered in algae. "Hmm, maybe not." He turned to go back but found that his dramatic hopping from rock to rock had made many of the smaller stepping stones wobbly and unstable. Hesitating, he put his foot down on the rock behind him and quickly shifted his wait to grab the boulder that was just beyond.

"Joel!" Grian shouted, but it was too late. Unbalanced, Joel flailed around a fell as the rock gave way to the current and tumbled downstream. He landed in the freezing water with a splash, and the last thing he heard before he went under was Grian's distressed screams.

Cold, cold, cold. That was the first thing Etho was aware of as Joel fell into the river. He didn't dwell on that though; he was too numb with shock as he watched Joel float further and further away.

"I have a fishing rod!" Gem frantically screamed as they all ran downstream and tried to catch up to Joel. It was no use. The current was too strong. Joel's head burst from the water a few times but was always pushed back down. Gem practically hurled the fishing rod at Joel as the hook caught onto his hoodie and kept him from traveling even farther away.

"Ooh, my arms!" Gem cried as she tried to hang on to the fishing rod. Dirt was already piling up beneath her shoes as she started to slide towards the river.

"We have to save him!" Grian cried, looking at Joel's figure sputtering as Gem tried to hurl him in. "Can anyone swim really well?"

"We can't risk it," Pearl worried, wringing her hands. "The current is too strong. They're just end up washed downstream too."

"Then does anyone else have a fishing rod?" Etho asked, running towards Joel. He stared helplessly out at the rolling waves.

"Hurry up!" Gem shouted, tears threatened to escape from her eyes from how sore her arms were getting. "Any longer and the fishing rod will snap!"

No, Etho thought, a pit opening in his stomach. "I'll go!"

"You can't!" Lizzie wailed. "You'll get trapped too!"

"I have a fishing rod too," Bdubs said, fumbling with a cheaper version of Gem's rod. "I rented it." He looked at it worriedly. "It definitely isn't as strong as Gem's."

"Hook it onto me," Etho said. "I'm going in."

"Are you sure?" Bdubs asked, his eyes wide.

"I'm sure," Etho said. He looked around. Aha.

"Tie this around my waist too," he said, tugging on a thick vine hanging from one of the trees. It wouldn't budge. He tugged at it for a long time before Impulse, Tango, Scar, Jimmy, and Grian managed to help pull it off.

"Alright," Bdubs said, still a bit worried. He hooked his fishing rod onto Etho and Scar, Impulse and Tango gripped the vine. Jimmy and Grian stood by the edge of the water as back-up while Pearl and Lizzie helped Gem hold onto the fishing rod. Mumbo supervised the whole rescue mission while Cleo, Skizz, and Martyn each climbed trees and dangled vines in hopes that either Etho or Joel could grab onto them.

"I'm going in!" Etho declared as he waded into the water. It was cold, sure, but it was no colder than he already was. He gripped Skin's vine first and gave him a thumbs up as he sank deeper into the water and had to start to swim. He then reached for Cleo's vine and nearly missed as he made his way over to Joel. However, Martyn's was too far off, and he knew he couldn't grab it even if he jumped.

I have to to this for Joel, he thought, pushing on. With a leap of courage, he let go of Cleo's vine and swam for his life until he reached Martyn's.

"ALMOST THERE!" Mumbo called from the shore, sounding really nervous. The fishing rod and the vine tied around Etho's waist prevented him from being washed away, at least.

"Faster!" Pearl, Gem, and Lizzie yelled at the same time. The mound of dirt was larger now, and the three of them were struggling to stay in place. The fishing rod also had a splinter in it, and the string was getting thinner by the second.

Almost there, Etho thought, gripping Martyn's vine as he swam as close to Joel as possible while still holding the vine. Taking a deep breath, he swam and grabbed Joel before immediately pivoting and grabbing Martyn's vine again.

"You okay?" he gasped at Joel, wheezing. Joel was coughing out water.

"Yeah," he croaked. "Thanks for saving me."

"Anytime," he said, hugging Joel closer. Joel had a death grip on Etho as he swam to Cleo's vine and then Skizz's. When they finally reached the shore, Grian and Jimmy grabbed them both and lifted them out of the water.

They just sat there, breathing for a while. The whole experience was terrible. Joel was still clutching Etho, huddling for warmth. Bdubs offered his jacket to them and Etho wrapped it around Joel, even though he was also cold.

They were soulmates, he realized. It was certainly a weird and dramatic way to realize. But they were. The cold wasn't just a coincidence. Joel shivered as Etho stood up, wobbled, and Grian had to grab him for support.

"Come on," he ushered them back onto the forest path. "Let's get you back to camp."

They huddled together by the campfire as the rest of the group made burgers. Lizzie came over and offered them both burgers, which they both gratefully accepted.

"Mm sorry," Joel muttered when he was done with his burger. "It's my fault you had to swim in the freezing water."

"It's not your fault," Etho said, shifting in his chair to make more room for Joel. They were starting to dry now.

"It was though," Joel said, looking sad. "If I had just listened to Cleo and Grian..."

"Don't say that," Etho insisted. Joel looked up at his face, that was still covered by that soggy mask. "I would save you again if I had to."

"Thank you," Joel said, burying his face into Bdub's jacket. "You know, I'm glad your my soulmate."

"I am too," Etho replied, leaning back in his chair again. "I am too."

"Are you guys dry yet?" Grian asked, joining Etho and Joel by the fire. "We want to roast marshmallows and tell ghost stories."

"Pretty much," Etho said, lifting his sleeve. He examined it and shrugged. "Joel?"

"M' pretty dry," he replied, shifted so he sat up better. "I'm in. You have smore ingredients?"

"Cleo brought some," Grian said just as Scott came over, his hands full of graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmellow bags. He hadn't gone on the journey to the river because he wanted to explore a flower field, so he felt a bit guilty he wasn't there to help. Now, he helped around the camp as much as possible. Cooking, setting up camp, carrying items, you name it.

"Cool," Joel said, making no move to get his own chair. Not that Etho minded. He was fine with sharing with Joel. He was still cold, anyway.

They all sat around the campfire, laughing, telling jokes, and insulting over people's marshmallow roasting skills. Grian's were always undercooked; Jimmy ate them raw along with Scott and Lizzie.

"That's a crime," Joel had gasped when he saw that. Etho was glad. Joel was feeling better already.

Speaking of Joel, his marshmallows were always burnt so badly it was a wonder that Joel could even eat it without spitting it out. Etho always tried to make his marshmallow perfect, but it was always undercooked at some parts and burnt at others. He noticed that probably the only person who got a guaranteed perfect marshmallow was Mumbo, who had seemed to have perfected his technique a long time ago.

Soon, it was time to sleep. Everyone chose a tent and set up sleeping bags. It was going fine until Joel declared: "I don't have a sleeping pad!" when many of the other campers realized that they didn't have one either.

"Me neither," Jimmy added.

"Told you we should have checked if we had everything," Lizzie said, throwing up her arms in exasperation at Joel. "Grian, do you have extras?"

"I do, actually." Grian counted his extra pads and frowned. "I only have two. Guess that means you're sleeping on ground, Joel."

"WHYYYY," Joel complained.

"Remember? We agreed that if we're short on supplies ur not getting any."

"Oh," Joel said, looking thoughtful. "We did agree on that, didn't we."

"Yeah," Grian agreed. "Okay, well, I'm going in. I hate standing outside in the dark with all the bugs."

Soon, everyone started to return to the tents. Scar, Grian, Jimmy, Tango, and Mumbo shared one, Scott, Skizz, and Martyn shared one, Pearl, Lizzie, Gem, and Cleo shared one, Bdubs, Impulse, and Etho shared one, and Joel got the Beach tent.

"WHY," Joel had yelled when he heard the news. "WHY do I get the BEACH TENT?"

"We're short on supplies," Grian had said when he poked his head out of the tent he was using.

"This is so unfair," Joel said, pouting. "I almost drowned today. I should get the biggest tent."

"Nope," Grian replied as he poked his head outside a second time.

"Hmph," Joel grumbled, kicking a rock.

"I'll keep you company," Etho offered. Somewhere off in the distance, Pearl, Lizzie, and Gem shared a knowing glance.

"Alright," Joel said, shrugging. He gave the beach tent a glare before starting to unroll his sleeping bag.

THE FLOOR WAS HARD.

Joel guessed that much was obvious, but sleeping on twigs and rocks turned out to be WAY worse than he imagined.

"Ow," he rubbed his back. It was already sore after laying on the STUPID GROUND for like, a few seconds.

"You okay?" Etho asked, sitting up. "It sounds like you've been in pain all night."

"I have been in pain all night!" Joel whined. "And it's cold! Stupid ground! Stupid Grian! Stupid wind!"

Ehh, this was going to be awkward. "You, err, want to share mine?" Joel blinked, his mind still processing what Etho had just said. "You know what," Etho said after Joel didn't reply. "Ignore me. Forget what I just said. I'm going to sleep now-"

"I'm coming over," Joel insisted. "I'll have you know there is a very pointy rock under me and it's poking me to death."

"Alright," Etho said, amused. He rolled to the end of the sleeping bag and stayed very still as Joel climbed in.

"This is so much better than my stupid sleeping bag," Joel muttered, trying to get comfortable. They were squished together pretty tight. "Anyway, g'night." Etho watched skeptically as Joel fell asleep practically immediately.

How do people just do that? He thought, frowning. Oh, sleep was a long time coming for him.

Back in Grian's tent, they were having a party.

Or, err, Grian, Scar, and Tango were. Mumbo was looking exasperated and Jimmy had his face buried in his pillow, his hands over his ears.

"WHYYY ARE YOU GUYS HAVING A PARTY?" Jimmy complained into his pillow.

"Why not?" Grian said, tossing a marshmallow at Scar's head. Scar tried to catch it in his mouth but it hit his eye instead.

"HOW ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS?" Jimmy asked Mumbo, who was now looking resigned.

"I just got used to it," Mumbo said, motioning at the craziness of the whole situation. "You will too soon."

"I don't get it," Jimmy grumbled, smashing his pillow onto his head. At least they weren't blasting music yet.

"Time to wake up!" Grian declared at four in the morning.

"I hate camping with you," Jimmy declared. "Remind me to never sleep over at your house."

"Oh, don't worry!" Grian said brightly. "All the sleepovers will happen at your house!"

"S' too early," Scar mumbled, rolling over and draping an arm around Grian. "Go back to sleep."

"Fine," Grian grumbled. "I'll wake you guys up in an hour then."

"NO, DON'T," Jimmy burrowed deeper into his sleeping bag and tried to drown out the sound of Grian laughing.

"Rise and shine!" Grian declared exactly an hour later.

"I hate you," Jimmy glared at Grian as he yawned and sat up. "No point going back to sleep now. Couldn't fall back asleep when you woke us up the first time anyway."

"Aww, you love me really," Grian said. "Come on, let's see who else is awake!"

"Literally no one!" Jimmy yelled at Grian as he exited the tent. "Grian, you're the only mental person here!"

When Joel woke, he felt Etho's arms around him. He exhaled slowly, not sure what to do. Could he wiggle out without waking Etho, or would he have to-

"I'm awake," Etho said, rubbing his eyes. He blinked. "You really are a restless sleeper."

"So are you," Joel rolled his eyes. It seemed that they had gotten tangled together overnight.

This is totally normal, Etho reassured himself. They were soulmates, they could sleep together. Really, how was Joel not freaking out right now?

"We should take lots of photos of the whole campsite before everyone cleans up," Pearl suggested. "It would be cool! Like, a photo album!"

"Too bad we didn't take a photo of Joel drowning," Gem sighed. "That's probably the most memorable part of the whole trip!"

"Gem, you know how weird that sounded?" Pearl deadpanned.

"Yup," Gem said, with misplaced cheerfulness.

"I took a picture of it, actually," Lizzie said, holding up her phone.

"LIZZIE, when did you even have TIME to do that?" Gem asked.

"You know, when someone is drowning, the first thing someone does isn't usually 'take a photo'," Pearl smothered a laugh.

"It should be take a photo," Lizzie argued. "Or else, how will anyone remember?"

"No one wants to remember drowning," Gem said.

"Well, I wasn't drowning, Joel was!"

"Isn't Joel your best friend?" Pearl was now also laughing. "When your best friend drowns, I don't think you're supposed to take a photo either."

"He didn't drown!" Lizzie protested. "He almost drowned.

"Yeah, and that makes all the difference," Pearl laughed. Lizzie gave her a playful shove before putting her phone away.

Chapter Text

[Lizzie]: Which ski resort we going to again?

Was it the Alpine one?

[Grian]: I think so

Ask someone more reliable

[Joel]: I thought it was Black Bear???

[Impulse]: I think it was BB too

[Jimmy]: BB?

[Impulse]: Black bear

[Jimmy]: oh

[Pearl]: Didn't we decide on Monopoly Mountain???

[Scott]: Was it???

[Cleo]: Why is everyone so bad at communicating

I swear Ren told me we were going to Dogwarts

[Ren]: We are going to Dogwarts though, right?

[Martyn]: Hmm I think so

[Skizz]: I also think it's the Alpine one

[Jimmy]: WHAT IS THE ALPINE ONE

[Scar]: MONOPOLY MOUNTAIN

[Etho]: I have no idea which ski resort we're going to

[Joel]: Me neither

[Tango]: It was Minecraft, right???

[Jimmy]: Maybe???

Sounds familiar

But BB also sounds familiar

[BigB]: I also recognize BB

[Grian]: I think it was Minecraft personally

[Joel]: I don't trust you

You said it yourself:

You're not reliable

[Grian]: I did???

[Mumbo]: You did

[Pearl]: I have proof if u don't believe

[Grian]: Alright alright

Fine

[Gem]: I found the flier you gave me!

It's Minecraft!

[Scott]: Alright

Does anyone else need to rent skis yet

I dunno any good places

[Joel]: Try the one next to the pizza place

I've been going there for years

[Jimmy]: I need skis too

[Gem]: Wait

Can't you rent them at the ski resort???

[Etho]: You can

But the lines are really long

[Gem]: I'll catch up to you guys then

I'm on a fishing trip rn

Although it isn't going too well

Very cold up here

[Grian]: Alright

It's decided then

We'll meet up tomorrow everyone!

"Hey! Over here!" Scar waved his arms at the people who were stepping off of the Gondola.

"Oh wow," Lizzie said, poking her ski pole into the snow. "Look how powdery the snow is!"

"It's powder-snow skiing!" Joel grinned.

"I didn't think the conditions would be this nice, honestly," Grian said, stirring up some snow with his ski boot. "It's really late into the season."

"And that," Pearl said, appearing behind Grian. (He let out a scream, although he wouldn't admit it ever) "Is the power of snow-making machines!"

"Really?" Joel frowned, kicking the snow. "Looks pretty real to me."

"Maybe some of it's real," Pearl shrugged.

"I think your expectations are too low," Grian said, rolling his eyes. "I'd say most of it's real, honestly."

"Look! There's Jimmy and Scott!" Lizzie waved at two figures as they tried (unsuccessfully) to run in the think snow. (Jimmy fell on his face).

"Stupid snow," Jimmy muttered as they caught up. Scott laughed, and Jimmy glared at him.

"The others sure are taking their time," Pearl pointed out. "Do you guys just want to go on a short track and meet them later?"

"I'M HERE!" Gem hollered, joining them. "Oh, skiing? sure."

"Alright," Grian said, shrugging. "I'm in."

"Where is everyone?" Bdubs said, looking around.

"Are we the first ones?" Impulse put on his snow gloves. "Wasn't expecting that."

"Maybe they're on a lift," Etho said.

"Why are your skis on your feet?" Impulse asked, giving his skis a weird look.

"Where else would they be? On my head?"

"The lifts are uphill," Impulse pointed out.

"I don't think the others would leave without us-" Bdubs started, but was interrupted by Tango as he hopped off the gondola.

"Hey guys," He said, clipping on his skis.

"See?" Etho motioned at Tango. "I'm not the only one with skis on!"

Jimmy face planted into the snow.

Again.

The first time, Scott had helped him up. The second time, he had given him a really now? look but helped him up anyway.

"He's giving lovey-dovey eyes to Scott," Lizzie whispered to Gem.

"But he also gives lovey-dovey eyes to Tango," Gem argued.

"Can you guys not use the term 'lovey dovey' ever again?" Pearl pleaded, covering her eyes. Not a smart decision on her part, really, as she was still sliding downhill.

"But just look at them!" Lizzie motioned at Jimmy and Scott as Scott helped Jimmy up again. "What if we got it wrong? What it they're soulmates?"

"He's still clearly in love with Tango," Gem argued. "Have you seen his dovey-lovey eyes?"

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO SAY THAT WORD AGAIN," Pearl complained. Gem blinked.

"But I didn't say lovey-dovey'," Gem pointed out. "I said 'dovey-lovey'."

"THAT'S EVEN WORSE," Pearl made a sharp turn and covered both Lizzie and Gem in snow.

"Don't you ship them too?" Lizzie asked, also turning (but without dumping snow on Gem and Pearl).

"I mean, I do," Pearl said. "But I'm sane, and I don't use the term 'lovey-dovey'. EVER."

"Hmm," Lizzie shook her head. "You're just in denial."

"ABOUT WHAT, exactly?" Pearl demanded.

"I dunno," Lizzie shrugged. "You're just in denial."

[Cleo]: Where r u guys

[Joel]: Skiing

[Cleo]: How did you even type that then if ur skiing

[Joel]: Skill

[Cleo]: I don't think it works like that

[Joel]: Fine

I'll prove it

Are u at the resort yet

[Cleo]: Yup

[Joel]: Then I'll meet you at the easiest lift

I don't think Jimmy could survive the second easiest lift

Guess how many times he has fallen on his face already

[Cleo]: three?

[Joel]: FOUR

no, actually, he just fell on his face again

MAKE THAT FIVE

[Cleo]: Oh wow

How short is this run?

[Joel]: I mean

I'll let you decide

It's called "Big Easy"

[Cleo]: Yeah, he probably wouldn't survive the second easiest run

[Joel]: Exactly

"The others are skiing," Cleo said, putting her phone away.

"How long until they come down?" Skizz asked. "Should we go on without them?"

"I think they're almost down, honestly," Cleo replied. "They're on 'Big Easy'."

"Doesn't it take, like, five minutes to do 'Big Easy'?" Mumbo asked.

"We've been waiting for over five minutes now, I think," Impulse said.

"Jimmy's been having some trouble skiing," Cleo supplied.

"Hey, look, that's them!" Bdubs pointed to a group of skiers as they skied down the last slope of 'Big Easy'. They watched, half-amused, half-concerned, as Jimmy fell on his face and Scott had to help him up.

"He's been doing that the WHOLE TIME," Joel declared when they met up. "PLEASE, can SOMEONE go with me on a harder run?"

"Not me," Jimmy said. "Definitely not me."

"OF COURSE NOT YOU," Joel threw his hands up into the air.

"I think we should do another easy track first," Gem suggested. "You know, for the beginners?"

"What about 'Snow Cone'?" Lizzie pointed at a mellow track on the map.

"Fine," Joel grumbled. "We'll do Snow Cone."

This run went smoother, with Jimmy falling on his face only TWO times. Grian and Scar spent most of their time arguing about if one, Jellie was cute, or two, Jellie was cute AND evil.

"I'm telling you, Jimmy have Tango a love-sick look just now." Gem said, pointing to Jimmy, who was sandwiched inbetween Scott and Tango, who were actually firing daggers at each other right now. Weird.

"Well, I'm telling you he's in love with Scott," Lizzie crossed her arms, and almost toppled over. She wasn't so good at balancing yet.

"You two need to make up your minds," Pearl said.

"WHAT ABOUT YOU?" Gem asked, WAY too loudly. Lizzie nodded in agreement.

"I'm fine with either," Pearl shrugged. "As long as they're happy." Lizzie nodded again, but Gem looked thoughtful.

"I think someone is always going to be unhappy in this relationship," Gem pointed out. "No matter if Jimmy chooses Tango or Scott, the one who's rejected will be unhappy."

"Okay," Joel said when they were done with Snow Cone. "Now can we go do a harder track?"

"Maybe just the experts. I don't think I'm ready," Gem said. Lizzie, Jimmy, Scott, and Scar nodded in agreement.

"Really, Scar?" Grian asked. "This is your second time skiing, right?"

"I mean, yes, it is," Scar said. "But I don't think I'm that good yet."

"Just try a blue square with me, please?" Grian pleaded.

"Fine," Scar gave in.

"Well, I'm going on a black diamond. See ya' later!" Joel called, turning away.

"I'll join," Tango offered.

"Me too," said Etho.

"Anyone else?" Joel asked.

"I'll stick to the blue squares, thanks," Pearl said, inching away.

"Your loss, then," Joel shrugged.

"Let's race," Joel declared the second they stepped off the ski lift.

"You're slow," Etho rolled his eyes. "It'll be no fun."

"You have me," Tango said as Joel protested a "NO I'M NOT!"

"Good point," Etho nodded. "You're pretty fast."

"I'M ALSO FAST!" Joel hollered, stomping around (unsuccessfully. It was hard to stomp in skis).

"Prove it," Etho said. "Beat us in a race."

"I'll show you!" Joel cut off and promptly raced off.

"CHEATER!" Tango yelled at him, also starting to ski. "WE DIDN'T START YET!" Joel, (dumbly), decided to turn around and stick out his tongue at Tango. (He almost crashed into a tree, but didn't. Maybe he could pull that off on an easier track, but he was on a black diamond.)

Tango was starting to gain speed, but Etho wasn't going to stand for that. Maybe they didn't choose the best track for this, though, as it was narrow and twisty and went through many dense sections of forest and on a cliffside.

"I'M WINNING!" Joel cheered, which was not fair because he cheated. Etho frowned, and passed Tango, who yelped with anger and tried to go even faster than he was already going.

Big mistake.

Tango failed to make a sharp turn, and almost fell off a cliff but was saved when he hit a tree instead, which was growing by the edge of the run.

"TANGO!" Etho screamed, immediately stopping and turning around. A bit hard, since it was steep, but doable. "JOEL! GET BACK HERE! TANGO'S HURT!" He didn't bother to check if Joel had heard him before he tentatively popped off his skis and started to inch towards Tango. The snow was already crumbling and falling off the cliff under Tango's feet.

"Grab my hand!" Etho called to Tango, who was wincing as he tried to get away from the edge. Tango grabbed, and the snow underneath Etho shifted as he felt it give way.

"I got you!" Joel yelled and clutched Etho so tightly he thought he was going to suffocate. Which, was fortunate for them, as Joel managed to get Etho and Tango both to safety.

"I think I broke my leg," Tango tried to stand up, but collapsed. His skis were dangling off the cliff- wait. Etho should probably grab those before they fell off.

"I'll call for a ski patrol," Joel said, taking out his phone. Oof. The air was freezing, and his fingers were definitely going to get frostbite from this. (Or maybe not. It wasn't that bad, actually).

"They'll be here in a minute," Joel said. "Actually, make that a few minutes. This track's a bit steep for one of their jet skis."

"You okay?" Etho asked Tango, who was leaning on his left leg as he sat in the snow.

"My right leg's definitely broken," he said, his voice cracking from the pain.

"Don't worry," Joel reassured him. "They're bringing a doctor on the patrol too."

They were skiing on Sugar Cone again when Jimmy's leg just broke and he collapsed to the ground. At first, Gem thought Jimmy was having more trouble with his balance again, but when Scott screamed "HELP!", Gem knew something was wrong.

"I think it's broken," Lizzie said gently, helping Jimmy up. "Come on. The end's not far away." Scott helped support Jimmy's other side as he winced from the pain.

"How'd it break?" Gem asked Jimmy. He had looked fine before he fell.

"I think it was my soulmate," he replied, trying to walk himself, but failing. He yelped in pain and Scott lifted him higher.

"I'll tell the others," Gem said, pulling out her phone. "Hopefully, they're in the lodge right now. It's almost lunch time."

In the chat, Gem discovered, was a whole new batch of PANIC and WHAT and SOMEONE BROKE A LEG.

[Joel]: TANGO IS DEAD

[Gem]: TANGO IS WHAT??

[Joel]: I mean, not dead, but HE BROKE HIS LEG

[Gem]: Jimmy also broke his leg

[Joel]: HOW DID TWO PEOPLE BREAK THEIR LEGS IN THE SAME DAY

[Gem]: No, no, I mean

Jimmy's SOULMATE broke their leg

[Joel]: ...

Are Jimmy and Tango soulmates?

Have I been living in my hole my whole life???

DOES EVERYONE ELSE KNOW THIS???

[Gem]: It's new

Why are we not freaking out rn????

SOMEONE BROKE A LEG

[Joel]: TWO someones

Hmm

I mean, a ski patrol arrived just now

So Tango will be okay

[Gem]: HOW did we not think of calling a ski patrol

[Joel]: What track are you on?

[Gem]: Sugar Cone

[Joel]: You should be okay then, not too long

[Gem]: Meet you at the lodge, then?

[Joel]: Soon

Gotta take Tango to the clinic thingy they have here

[Gem]: Oh right

I feel like Lizzie, Scott, and I are not very good at this medical stuff

Didn't even think of taking Jimmy to a hospital

[Joel]: You guys really aren't

"BING."

"What was that?" Grian asked, stopping.

"I dunno," Scar said, shrugging. He was clutching onto Grian as if his life depended on it. Blue squares were terrifying.

"It came from that direction, I think," BigB motioned at Grian and Scar.

"Sounded like a notification?" Cleo suggested.

"BING."

"There it is again!" Grian said. More and more of his friends were catching up and stopping, huddling around Grian at the edge of the track. Many strangers were giving his glares right now as they had to avoid the cluster of people.

"BING. BING."

"I think someone's texting on Desert Duo Ship," Ren said, coming over.

"Grian, do you have notifications turned up like, really loud, right now?" Skizz asked, also catching up.

"No," Grian said, fishing out his phone. "I have notifications, but they aren't that loud-"

[Joel]: TANGO IS DEAD!

"Hmm," Grian said, reading the first message. "Something's gone wrong."

"What?" Scar said, reading over Grian's shoulder.

[Gem]: TANGO IS WHAT?

"Care to read out the texts out loud?" Cleo asked.

"Sure," Grian said. "Text one: Tango is dead."

"WHAT," Martyn said, finally catching up to the group. Mumbo was close behind him. As he wanted to make sure everyone was safe, he skied at the very back.

"Text two," Grian said, moving on, ignoring the "WHAT"s everyone was giving him. "TANGO IS WHAT?"

"EXACTLY," Martyn said. "WHAT."

"Text three-"

"Don't say 'TEXT'!" Pearl pleaded. "Just hurry up and say everything! I'm dying of suspense here!"

"Okay," Grian said, shrugging. "I mean, not dead, but HE BROKE HIS LEG."

He proceeded to tell everyone what happened.

"We should probably ski down as fast as we can and meet them at the lodge," Mumbo said when he was finished. "Then we can discuss further issues."

"Good idea," Grian said, stuffing his phone back into his pockets and putting his gloves back on. "Come on. Scar, let go of me!"

"Are you guys okay?" Pearl demanded, running over to the large table that they had reserved for the group. "Jimmy, Tango?"

"They're alright," Lizzie reassured her. "They're in the clinic right now. I think we should leave, maybe get a snack. They need to get treated by a professional doctor, not the nurse they brought here."

"How bad is it?" Bdubs asked when he joined them.

"Not that bad," Etho replied. "Trees aren't that hard. But it's worse than what we hoped."

"How long will they have to be in a cast?" Grian asked, joining them.

"Maybe, half-a-year?" Joel replied, frowning. "Come on, is everyone here? Who can drive them?"

"I can," Scott offered. "I came with Jimmy in the first place."

"Didn't Tango come alone, though?" Grian worried. "What about his car?"

"He was dropped off, pretty sure," Etho replied.

"So they're soulmates, then," Pearl said, adjusting her ski helmet. Scott stiffened beside her. Hmm. Maybe Lizzie had a point.

"Seems so," Etho pushed open the lodge door. "I just hope they'll be okay."

Chapter Text

Scott was very much panicking right now, thank you very much. A great way to be spending his Saturday.

At least he had Lizzie for company; she had decided to ditch Joel for the hurt friends. (Joel felt very betrayed and was very dramatic about it even though he wanted to ditch his own car to come along with Lizzie and Scott). Right now, Scott was driving rather poorly onto the highway as Lizzie (who had taken the front seat for some reason? Maybe because Tango and Jimmy were hurt???) texted on Desert Duo Ship.

"Should we get food?" Scott asked, cursing his bad driving skills. Jimmy was surprisingly good at driving, and had drove the both of them to the ski resort. Scott, not so much. Maybe he could get Lizzie to switch with him later. On the way home, maybe?

"I'm hungry," Jimmy volunteered.

"You need to get to the hospital," Lizzie argued.

"Good point," Jimmy said, settling back down. Tango laughed and leaned back into his (unfortunately not the front) seat, trying to ignore the pain in his leg.

"Maybe after?" He suggested. "Hmm, how long do you think we'll be in the hospital?"

"Long," Lizzie said. "I broke my wrist once. You have to get a cast. Likely larger than the one I had. The process goes overnight, I think."

"You think?" Tango asked.

"I mean, I was asleep the whole time," Lizzie shrugged. "So yeah, I think."

"How'd you break your wrist?" Jimmy asked as Scott fiddled with the window-wiping feature. It was starting to snow. Jimmy's car was confusing.

"Funny story, actually," Lizzie replied. "So one day, you know, I was walking down the stairs, wanted to feed my pet axolotl-"

"You have a pet axolotl?" Tango asked.

"She does," Jimmy said. "I've met her. She gave me one too, for my birthday."

"We're seablings," Lizzie explained. "I named my axolotl Cherry, she was pink, and Jimmy named his-"

"Cod," Jimmy put in.

"I will never, EVER understand your naming style," Scott said, wishing he could get off the highway and pass the driving activity on to Lizzie.

"Why Cod?" Tango asked, rather nicely, actually. When Jimmy told Joel about Cod, he had screamed. However, that may have been just because Joel was Joel, and Joel was dramatic.

"He looks like a cod, eats a lot of cod, and overall gives off very 'cod' feelings."

"Jimmy, how does an axolotl give off 'cod feelings'? Also, Lizzie, can you drive?"

"Hmm, probably better than you," Lizzie said. "Get off the highway and we'll switch."

"Thank cod," Scott said. Jimmy, Tango, and Lizzie all started laughing. "What?"

"You said 'thank cod'," Tango explained.

"We should thank Cod, though," Jimmy said thoughtfully.

"It should be the new way of saying 'Thank god'," Lizzie finally decided. "Thank cod!"

"LIZZIE, YOU DRIVE LIKE A MADMAN!" Scott screamed as Lizzie slammed her foot on the gas pedal, before immediately lifting it after the car lurched forward dangerously.

"I like to think that I drive amazingly, thank you," Lizzie said, turning and sending everyone flying left.

"How did you even get a drivers license if you drive like this?" Tango asked, amused. He was probably the least motion-sick out of all of them, not counting Lizzie. Maybe even counting Lizzie, actually.

"I was better at driving a month ago," Lizzie said, making another sharp turn in the opposite direction. Scott actually screamed when he was launched right.

"LIZZIE, DRIVING A CAR SHOULD NOT FEEL LIKE A ROLLERCOASTER!" He yelled, trying to find anything he could find to grip onto for support.

"Not like you did any better," Lizzie said, turning again. Scott was beginning to detest this road. Why would anyone invent a road with so many turns? At least Lizzie wasn't driving on the highway. That would be SO MUCH WORSE.

"I DRIVE MUCH BETTER THAN THIS," Scott protested. He turned around. "You guys feeling okay?"

Jimmy was silent, but Tango piped up. "I can feel Jimmy's motion-sickness through the soul bond," Tango bit out. "Not a great feeling, honestly. I've never gotten so motion-sick before."

Ah. There it was. That pang of jealousy. Scott cursed his stupid brain and his stupid crush(es? This was very confusing. Help).

Honestly, he didn't even know who he was jealous of. That was the stupidest part. He had always had a crush on Jimmy, which had developed slowly over the years of friendship. Tango's was the opposite. They had met up at the amusement park last summer, rather recently, and it was crush(?) at first sight. The world was very stupid, Scott decided, as he almost fell out of his seat due to a poor maneuver made by Lizzie. She had already made a whole ton of those. Maybe he should ask for the driver's seat back.

"Lizzie, I just realized you never told us how you broke your wrist," Jimmy piped up, startling Scott out of his train of thoughts. "Avoiding the question?"

"No," she denied. "Fine, so what happened is I was going downstairs to feed Cherry when I tripped, reached out with my arm, and broke my wrist."

"Ouch," Tango commented, crossing his legs. "Must have hurt."

"Probably wasn't as bad as what you're going through now," Lizzie said, shrugging.

When they arrived at the hospital, Scott was so dizzy that when he stepped out of the car, he had to lean against it for support before he collapsed. He gave Lizzie a how are you not dead right now look before trying to walk.

"Jimmy, you okay? Tango?" He asked. Jimmy wasn't looking so good. He started to get out, but Scott pushed him back in. "Wait here. One, you're motion sick, and you'll probably fall on your face. Two, your leg is broken. I'm going to go call a doctor over, okay?"

"Thank cod," Jimmy said, settling back down. "I thought I was going to have to walk the whole way inside the hospital!"

[Grian]: How are Tim and Tango

[Joel]: I would like to say 'Tim and Tango' sounds very weird

[Gem]: Agreed

[Scott]: In the emergency room thingy I think

Not actually sure

They made us wait in the stupid lobby

"Should we get food?" Lizzie asked. "I'm really hungry now."

"Sure," Scott said. "Uhh, how?"

"Driving, of course," Lizzie replied, missing Scott's concerned look.

"Uhh, but, I don't really want to drive, and you drive kinda..." He trailed off, looking embarrassed.

"Fine, I'll go myself," Lizzie said, picking up her backpack (when did she bring that inside?). "Can I have the keys?"

"Here," Tango passed Jimmy's car keys over to Lizzie and settled back into his seat.

"Should we, like, leave or something?" Scott asked after finishing his burger. "I mean, you said they'll probably be here overnight, right?"

"Using Jimmy's car?" Lizzie said, raising an eyebrow.

"Good point, actually," Scott frowned. "Are we really going to be stuck here overnight? This stinks."

"Where are Jimmy's parents?" Lizzie wondered, to no one in particular.

"They were out of town for some fancy meeting thing, if I remember correctly," Scott said. "Pretty far away. Should be on their way to the hospital now, come to think of it."

"Then we'll stay until they come," Lizzie decided. "Then we can get someone else to pick us up."

"Alright," Scott replied, opening his phone to play video games. "Tell me when they're here."

[Scott]: GUYS

IT'S BEEN AN HOUR AND JIMMY'S PARENTS ARE STILL NOT HERE

[Grian]: Have you tried calling them?

[Scott]: Do YOU know their number?

[Grian]: ...

No?

[Scott]: Well, I don't EITHER

So there

[Lizzie]: Spring is finally here <3

[Joel]: I'm so glad we went skiing before spring

[Scott]: Ikr

Thank cod

[Impulse]: ???

???????????????????

In the hospital's waiting room, Lizzie and Scott both burst into laughter, drawing many funny looks.

"Go fish," Scott said, grinning.

"Aww, come on!" Lizzie said, throwing up her cards.

"Any threes?" Lizzie asked.

"Nope."

"WHERE ARE THEY?"

"Absolutely no idea."

"So how you play is that you try to add, subtract, divide, and multiply the numbers to try to get twenty-four-"

"Are you trying to get me to play math outside of school?" Scott raised an eyebrow.

"It's a game!" Lizzie protested.

"Looks like math to me."

"It's like, the one card game I know."

"What about poker?"

"I have no idea how to play."

"Bridge?"

"Nope."

"What about, uhh, Speed?"

"Absolutely no idea."

"Solitare?"

"No."

"I don't want to play Go Fish again."

"Me neither."

"Then what games do you know?"

"..."

"So?"

"Go fish..."

"ARRRGGGGGGGGGG!"

[Scott]: Guys I'm bored

Wait

JIMMY'S PARENTS ARE FINALLY HERE

SO LONG STUPID HOSPITAL

[Mumbo]: ...

Okay

[Jimmy]: Guys

Tango and I are out of the hospital

[Joel]: Huh

You didn't even miss a day of school!

[Jimmy]: ...

[Joel]: What?

Scott was looking in the library for a book about soulmates. (No, he isn't going to tell you why. So shut up.)

He took an interesting looking one off a shelf and opened to a random page. He managed to read CAN SOULMATES BE POLY- before immediately shutting the book and ignoring it for around ten seconds before picking it up again.

[Mumbo]: Guys stop bullying me about my thumb shifting in LIFE

[Gem]: YOU WHAT

MUMBO WHY DO YOU THUMB SHIFT

[Skizz]: Mumbo that's weird

[Grian]: Ikr!

[Lizzie]: I mean that wasn't how I designed the game so uhh

[Mumbo]: I'm holding a contest for who plays LIFE the weirdest! I'll say what I do first: thumb shift

[Joel]: Automatic weirdest

[Mumbo]: You haven't even heard the others yet!

[Cleo]: I play on the couch

[Scott]: How are you not dead yet

[Cleo]: I am dead

ZOMBIEcleo, hellooo?

[Grian]: I have some custom key changes...

[Pearl]: What r the key changes?

[Grian]: Why should I tell u

[Pearl]: Guys I bet it's something weird

[Grian]: NO IT'S NOT

Also I forgot to mention that my headphones are like very old

[Pearl]: How old???

[Grian]: Not telling u that either

[Joel]: I feel left out

I was not invited to Mumbo's freakshow

[Scott]: Do you play LIFE in a funny way?

[Joel]: I mean no but-

[Mumbo]: Guys

Etho just announced his setup

Wait @Etho, can you send a pic?

[Etho]: Why

[Mumbo]: Please?

[Etho]: Fine

[Etho] sent an image.

[Lizzie]: Etho how old is that tissue box???

[Etho]: 5 years

[Joel]: ETHO why is the desk UP TO YOUR SHOULDERS

[Mumbo]: You haven't even seen how he uses the mouse yet

[Scott]: ?????????????

[Etho]: I don't get what's wrong with a 90 degree angle

[Scott]: ETHO WHY

THIS IS LIKE, WORSE THAN CLEO

[Mumbo]: Actually, @Cleo, would you care to send a picture of your setup?

[Cleo]: Alright

Here

[Cleo] sent a picture.

[Lizzie]: Wait are those SODA CANS?

[Mumbo]: Oop gotta go Impulse is up next

bye

[Scott]: ...

[Joel]: I hate not being in the action, don't you?

[Scott]: yup

[Joel]: Stupid school

I hate this

[Grian]: Ikr

This is so stupid

[Jimmy]: Guys it's recess

[Joel]: Just because it's recess does't mean school isn't stupid

[Gem]: Why r u guys texting?

Ur literally siting RIGHT NEXT TO EACHOTHER

[Jimmy]: ...

Because they're texting???

[Grian]: We text because talking is overated

Right Joel?

[Joel]: Absolutely

[Gem]: You guys are weird

[Joel]: HEY!

[Grian]: GUYS

YOU WON'T BELIEVE IT

I GOT A PESKY BIRD FROM THE PET STORE

I NAMED HIM PROF. BEAK

JUST LOOK AT HIM

[Grian] sent an image.

[Scar]: Ooo cute

[Mumbo]: Don't u have a stuffed parrot called prof. beak?

[Grian]: OOP I FORGOT ABOUT THAT

[Scar]: how could you Imma go cry now

[Grian]: ok I renamed the stuffed parrot

his name is prof. birb now

[Joel]: ok

Prof. Beak looks like u

[Grian]: Joel

How do I look like a bird???

[Joel]: U just do

[Scar]: I agree

Doesn't Grian look like a bird?

[Grian]: I DO NOT LOOK LIKE A BIRD

MUMBO, BACK ME UP HERE

[Mumbo]: Hmm, I dunno

You kinda do

[Grian]: YOU GUYS ARE SO MEAAANNNNNNNN

[Joel]: Wait guys this is awesome

Wait for it...

[Grian]: ?

[Joel]: #Grianisapeskybird

[Grian]: ...

you know what, I'm leaving

goodbye, cruel world

[Scar]: Wait!

[Grian]: Hmm?

[Scar]: I haven't even used the # yet!

[Grian]: Well too bad

[Pearl]: You guys are taking too long

Just use it stupids

#Grianisapeskybird

[Grian]: >:(

Chapter Text

[Scar]: Guys I met prof beak!!!

I found out he likes to bite my finger

[Joel]: Ha

[Grian]: He would probably bite ur finger too Joel

[Joel]: :(

[Scar]: He's also very poofy

[Lizzie]: GASP

Grian can I meet prof beak

[Grian]: Sure

This afternoon?

[Lizzie]: I'll be there :D

As a joke, Grian made Prof. Birb (the original stuffed prof. beak renamed) sit next to Prof. Beak, to see how he would react. Prof. Beak did not like Prof. Birb at all, and decided to attempt to murder him. Grian had to quickly take Bird away before he was ripped to shreds.

[Tango]: Guys

I found this cool place we can go to

It's like this treetop place with ziplines and parkour stuff.

[Tango] sent a picture.

[Grian]: Ooo cool

Let's go there

[Tango]: When?

[Grian]: ...Would you mind if we replaced our LIFE session with this???

[Joel]: YES

DON'T YOU DARE

[Grian]: fine

tomorrow then

[Tango]: ok

[Cleo]: The people who run the place are going to be so terrified when like 17 teenagers show up

[Joel]: Who cares let's go

[Tango]: What Joel said

[Grian]: Wait a minute

Joel you said you had a dentist appointment tomorrow

[Joel]: I think my parents forgot about that and I'm not gonna remind them

[Tango]: :o

[Joel]: >:)

[Grian]: :/

[Cleo]: ...

When Scar arrived at the zip lining place, he immediately went to check in.

"Hi! We're here for the 3:30 appointment-" Scar started, but was cut off by the employee.

"Sorry, you have to wait half an hour. (please hold blasting in the background XD) We're fully booked, and it's only three right now."

"Oh," Scar said, looking around. "Alright then." The waiting place was completely outdoors, and he really hadn't brought anything to entertain himself. Grian, Joel, and Jimmy, however, were gladly having an intense match of some sort of game they had drawn into the dirt with Tango, Impulse, Etho, and Skizz. Scar walked over to them and tried to understand it, but it was not use. He didn't really know if he wanted to join, actually, because it was getting really competitive.

Instead, he sat down on a log and tried to pass the time by watching the whole ordeal instead.

"Well, your horse is ugly."

"Your horse is dead."

"Your horse would also be dead, if I could help it. Here, have a donkey."

"No thanks, I don't want a donkey."

"Guys! My horse is winning!"

"Your horse is cheating!"

"No it isn't!"

"Yes it is! You're just drawing really really fast!"

"THE GAME IS ON THE GROUND. I CAN DECIDE HOW FAST MY HORSE IS."

"No you can't."

"I agree with Grian. I hereby declare that Impulse's horse should not be so fast."

"Make him this slow." (draws lines in dirt)

"No, he should be slower." (more lines in dirt)

"That's WAY too slow."

"That's why you should get a donkey!"

"Guys, I lost my horse."

"Jimmy! How did you lose your horse? The game is literally just drawing on the ground."

"I dunno."

Scar tried to make it all make sense, but in the end, his brain hurt. The only thing he could figure out was that it was some sort of game between horse or donkeys or something. It didn't matter in the end, though, because at that moment Gem and Lizzie showed up, right after their trip to try to catch Cherry some fish to eat.

"How'd it go?" Scar asked, waving.

"I got nothing," Lizzie sighed.

"I got a few minnows," Gem said. "And this larger fish. Not sure what it was. Cherry liked it, though."

The next to show up were Ren and Martyn, who had just returned from a play try-out.

"Are the results out?" Lizzie excitedly asked. "The play sounds so cool! I wanna watch it!"

"The results aren't out yet, but I'm pretty sure Ren got the lead," Martyn said. "He was amazing! You have to come watch. I'll buy you some tickets."

"How's Jimmy and Tango even going to zipline today?" Scott asked, looking at the pair of them.

"We're not," Tango said.

"We aren't?" Jimmy gave him a puzzled look.

"How are we supposed to zipline in in this?" Tango motioned at their casts.

"Oh, yeah," Jimmy frowned. "I kinda forgot about that, honestly."

"How in the world did you forget about a broken leg?" Joel piped up, looking up from his game. He was absolutely winning. Jeremy was going to win.

Jimmy shrugged. "I just did, I guess. Got used to it."

"That makes absolutely no sense," Scar said. "But alright."

Everyone had officially arrived at 3:24.

Six minutes before their appointment.

It was driving Scar absolutely crazy.

A few others had joined in on the horse-donkey game, and Scar still didn't understand any of it.

Scott had volunteered to opt out to drive Jimmy and Tango, because he felt sorry that they would have to wait around for two hours while they zip lined. (Pearl, Lizzie, and Gem partying in the background be like).

Anyway, no one really wanted the three of them to go, but they all agreed that it was only fair (if not to Scott) that they got to leave. (It was totally fair for Scott).

And now, Scar was practically melting with nothing to do.

The horse game was now over, and Grian was very mad.

His horse basically hated him.

Don't ask how.

Horses could do that in dirt games.

When it was over, Grian immediately went to Scar to comfort him after losing (terribly. It was all his horse's fault). However, Scar was basically dying of boredom by then, and was practically asleep.

"Scar," Grian said, shaking his shoulder.

No reaction.

"SCAR," Grian said again, still shaking.

Again, no reaction.

"SCAR, WAKE UP!" Grian tried to tickle him, but the effort was lost. Scar wasn't ticklish. But it was worth a shot (no it wasn't).

"Come on," Grian whined. He grabbed Scar's head and shook it a few times. Either he was actually asleep, or he was ignoring Grian.

Annoyed, Grian huffed, and stared intently at Scar's face. Maybe that would get a reaction out of him.

Nope.

He probably should have expected that, honestly. Scar's eyes were closed. He probably couldn't even see him.

Yeah. That was how physics worked, right?

Sighing, Grian tapped Scar once, twice, and three times. Then he kissed him.

Scar woke up with a "HABLUWEGAWA!" and almost fell backwards into a bush. Luckily Grian caught him before he did.

"Didn't know you hated my kisses so much," Grian teased.

"Not fair," Scar protested, kissing him back. "I was started that's all."

"Were you really asleep?" Grian asked.

"Actually, yes," Scar said sheepishly. Is it time yet?

"There's, like, one more minute."

Scar screamed so loud everyone jumped. Including Grian, who was actually prepared.

"Let's go on that black diamond," Joel suggested.

"All you ever want to do are black diamonds," Lizzie argued back.

"True, true," Joel replied. "How about this: We can do the easiest first, but if it's too easy for me, we can do whichever one I want."

"That's definitely not fair," Grian stated.

"That's like, the best you can get in a argument with Joel, really," Lizzie said.

"Okay, yeah, your right," Grian said again.

"What about you guys?" Lizzie asked, turning to the rest of the group.

They were gone.

Only Scar, Pearl, and Gem remained.

"Where is everyone?" Grian yelped.

"They were tired of your bickering and decided to go on the track 'Banana' instead." Pearl motioned to a map and they all crowded around it.

"Should we try to catch up?" Grian asked.

"It's all the way across the whole map," Scar complained. "I want to zipline now."

"Fair point," Joel said. "Come on, let's go on this one."

Martyn was mad.

"Who chose Banana?" Martyn asked. "It's like, across the whole map. Why would you do that?"

"Bdubs chose it," Impulse replied, pointing at Bdubs, who had gone ahead.

"Are we there yet, then?" Martyn frowned, holding his zipline in his hands. "These things are heavy."

"Quit being so dramatic," Cleo walked up to him, giving him a playful elbow.

"Look! I see it!" BigB pointed at the track the farthest away from where they were.

Yeah, Martyn was mad.

Driving away from the Treetop Adventure center, Scott finally realized how mountainous the road was. He was currently panicking. A lot.

When he had originally drove here, he had come with Pearl, who was unsurprisingly a very calm driver. Scott offered her his car, since it was bigger, and they both drove Tango and Jimmy there.

It was really weird that the two of them hadn't actually mentioned not being able to zipline, actually, considering the trip was thirty minutes long. Surely someone would have realized, right?

Hmm, or maybe it was all a set-up by Pearl.

Scott knew Pearl well enough to know that she would likely pull something like that one him. Especially when it involved Jimmy or Tango. Maybe not Tango so much, but Pearl was really good at spotting crushes, new or old.

He did remember Pearl having a relatively too-sweet-to-be-true face when she drove them to the treetop center, actually.

Maybe Scott could actually read emotions better than he thought.

Scott could not understand emotions.

That much Pearl knew.

Like, how did he not notice Jimmy's, fine, she was going to regret this, lovey-dovey face when he looked at him?

Yeah, she regretted it immediately.

Pearl scrunched up her nose, trying to erase the fact from her memory that she had actually thought that word. Or thought about thinking that word, honestly.

She blamed Lizzie and Gem.

"Two on a platform, one on a obstacle" was the rule the treetop staff had told them to follow.

They weren't following that rule.

Or, sort of.

Joel went on first, climbing a wooden bridge up to a platform. Grian followed immediately, followed by Pearl, who had won the rock-paper-scissors (or roshambo, whatever you call it) and followed Grian up.

Joel was already on the second platform, but Grian was stuck on the first obstacle, some simple steps on hanging wood. Pearl impatiently watched him, before Joel screamed "Look at me!" and ziplined away.

(He was totally screaming).

(Joel was in denial when he claimed he did not scream).

Joel was now way ahead of them, Grian was still struggling, Pearl was loosing patience, Lizzie was waiting behind Pearl, Gem was hanging uncertainly on the wooden bridge, and Scar was pouting on the ground.

It was all Grian's fault.

#blamegrian.

Anyway, Scar was tired of waiting, so he put his foot onto the bridge.

Rule break #1.

Then, Pearl decided she was tired of waiting too, so she decided to follow Grian.

Rule break #2.

And then the got caught.

There goes rule breaking.

"I'm so hungry right now," Impulse said, grasping a vine and stepping onto an obstacle.

"Did you not eat before coming here?" Skizz asked, turning around ahead of him. He was about to zipline.

"I forgot to," Impulse said, finishing the course. Skizz started to zipline, reaching for the net at the end of the zipline.

And he missed.

"Bye!" Impulse waved as Skizz dangled in the middle of the zipline.

"We should have a picnic," Jimmy suggested. "I'm so hungry."

"Alright," Scott said, still inching down the mountain. "In like, two hours."

"Noooooooooo," Jimmy cried.

"Oh come on, I'll make you homemade sandwich," Scott said, steering.

"Oh, alright," Jimmy said, immediately perking up.

"Give him a cod one," Tango snickered.

"NOOOOOOO, DOOOON'T-" Jimmy whined. "I can't just disrespect cod like that!"

"Alright, what about, err, peanut butter and jelly?"

"Fine," Jimmy grumbled, giving Tango a glare. Tango just laughed and slung an arm around Jimmy's shoulder.

"Look at me! I'm finally ziplining!" Grian yelled, flinging out his arms. He laughed in glee.

"Finally!" Pearl grumbled, gripping her zipline. "I'm coming!" Grian shifted out of her way as she glided down from one tree to the next. Joel was already out of sight. Pearl wondered where he was.

Joel, predictably, was where Etho was.

Obviously.

Oh, and he definitely wasn't obsessed.

What are you talking about?

Etho was the obsessed one.

Obviously.

Anyway, the other group had already made it to the ground.

Or, part of it.

So, Joel had met up with them, and sent a quick message to Grian that he was joining them.

This was Grian's reply:

[Grian]: oooooooo

you gonna join eeeffffooooo

[Joel]: what

[Grian]: ehehehehehehehehe

[Joel]: ur weird

goodbye

Yeah.

So that happened.

He had no idea what that was about.

None.

Okay, back to joining Etho.

The other group was much larger, meaning there were more people to bicker with.

Yeah, that's why he's here.

Not because of Etho.

Totally.

(Shut up).

Chapter Text

[Grian]: We finished our first track!

[Joel]: Oh yay we're on our fifth

[Grian]: WHAT???

[Joel]: You're very slow, u know?

[Grian]: I am not

Pearl, back me up here

[Pearl]: Hate to break it to you but you are really slow.

[Grian]: THE BETRAYEL

[Tango]: Hi

[Gem]: Hi!

[Tango]: I swear this trip is taking forever we're still not off the mountain yet

[Grian]: It didn't take that long to get here?

[Pearl]: Oh, Scott's a very poor driver

Trust me, I know

[Grian]: Then WHY did you entrust Scott with this task?

PEARL

90 PERCENT OF THE WHOLE ROAD IS DRIVING ON A CLIFFSIDE

[Pearl]: ...

Do you really not know???

[Tango]: Guys I'm right here

[Grian]: NOOOOO????

[Gem]: Sometimes you're really clueless

[Grian]: AM NOT!

[Gem]: And slow

[Grian]: >:(

[Tango]: Guys stop ignoring me

[Joel]: Tango stop interrupting the movie

[Tango]: I need answers though

[Lizzie]: I agree with Joel

Tango you're interrupting the movie

[Scar]: HEY GUYS!

[Grian]: IMMA LEAVE NOW GOODBYE

[Scar]: :(

[Gem]: You can't resist Scar's sad face Grian

[Joel]: Oh it's my turn to zipline bye

[Gem]: YOU'VE BEEN TEXTING ON A ZIPLINE???

[Joel]: No, BEFORE a zipline

Actually, now I'm on a zipline, so yeah

I've been texting on a zipline

[Gem]: JOEL!

"Hey, do you wanna listen to some music?" Scott asked, still driving.

"Sure," Tango replied.

Silence.

"Where's the music?"

"I dunno, you're supposed to play it."

"Then why'd you ask me if I wanted music?"

"To see if you'd play music."

"Oh, fine, I'll play music," Tango grumbled. He shot Jimmy, who had fallen asleep, an apologetic look before starting to blast deranged monkey sounds on top volume on his phone.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Scott yelled over the screams of the monkeys as Jimmy woke up with a loud "AAAAAAAAA!" and fell on his face.

"Playing music," Tango answered with a completely straight face.

"Please tell me you don't actually listen to this in your free time," Scott said through his clenched teeth.

"Maybe, maybe not," Tango replied, starting to laugh.

"Trust me, he listens to this in his free time," Jimmy piped up, to Tango's dismay.

"I do not!" he squawked.

"You are, like, the worst liar," Jimmy said solemnly, shaking his head in exaggerated sorrow. "I wish I could believe you."

"I do not!" Tango repeated, to deaf ears. He sighed, and paused the monkey noises.

When Scott had finally drove off the mountain, the others were pretty much finished with their ziplining.

Yeah, that was how long it took.

Actually, Scott reasoned, it probably would have been faster if they had just waited for the others to be done zip lining so they could drive them home.

Oh well.

Anyway, Scott had promised Jimmy a sandwich, so now he had to make him one.

[Grian]: WOOO!

That was fun!

[Gem]: Only for you

We were stuck behind you FOREVER

[Joel]: L

[Gem]: Petition to murder Joel

One signature required

[Lizzie]: Signed!

[Joel]: Wait what???

NO STOP

[Gem]: Our goal has been completed!

[Pearl]: I sign too anyway

[Gem]: Joel you better run

[Joel]: Running rn

[Scott]: L

I also sign

[Joel]: Petition to kill Scott?

...

[Gem]: You know what, sure

Scott, you better run too

[Scott]: But I'm not on the mountain anymore

[Gem]: I'll kill you anyway

[Joel]: L

[Gem]: *After I kill Joel

[Scott]: Ha

Not making the same mistake twice

[Joel]: nooooooo

Lizzie save me

[Lizzie]: Sorry

I signed the petition

[Joel]: THE BETRAYAL

[Lizzie]: L

[Lizzie]: Commissions are open for custom pillows!

(News flash: I can sew)

[Bdubs]: Oh, can I have one

[Lizzie]: Sure! Also, forgot to mention, they're free for people I like

Which includes you!

[Joel]: What about me

[Lizzie]: No

[Joel]: WHAT

You all are so mean I swear

[Lizzie]: Fine you can have one

IF you pay for the supplies

[Joel]: I will murder everyone in this group chat

[Gem]: I still have to murder you

[Bdubs]: Imma just ignore everyone else and ask when I can have the pillow??

[Lizzie]: Maybe in two days?

[Bdubs]: Ooh, cool!

Can you do special patterns or images?

[Lizzie]: I mean, I'm not really good at art

Maybe someone could help?

[Bdubs]: Oh!

Cleo's good!

[Joel]: That's true, have you seen her art! Bit creepy, but I love it

[Lizzie]: That was not the look I was going for, but it would probably look infinitely better than what I would have drawn

Wait, what do you want anyway?

It it's a pattern I can do that myself

[Bdubs]: I really want a horse!

[Lizzie]: Yup, I'm going to ask Cleo to draw that

I would end up drawing glorified squiggles

[Joel]: In my household, we love glorified squiggles

[Lizzie]: ok, I'll give you a pillow with glorified squiggles then

[Joel]: For free?

[Lizzie]: Hmm

What about a dollar?

[Joel]: OH COME ON

I DON'T HAVE A DOLLAR

[Lizzie]: What do you have then?

[Joel]: 17 cents

[Lizzie]: ...

I don't need seventeen cents

[Joel]: too bad, that's all I have

Or I could pay you in the form of a

a

wait, lemme thing

[Gem]: Hate to barge into this amazing conversation but

Do you guys know where Scott is?

I've given up on killing Joel bc this is really entertaining

[Joel]: HEY

But I'll forgive you if you kill Scott

[Lizzie]: Wait

Private messaging: Gem

[Lizzie]: I am like 99% sure he's on a date

With Tango and Jimmy

But also in detail whilst on the date

[Gem]: OH

OH YEAH

I can't kill him then, he needs to go on that date!

Texting: Desert Duo Ship:

[Gem]: nvm

Joel, I'm going to kill you anyway

[Joel]: WAIT NO

I CAN PAY YOU

IN

IN

uhh

[Gem]: I'm coming

[Lizzie]: You have to pay me too!

[Joel]: Books!

[Gem]: ooo

Maybe

What books?

[Lizzie]: Why do you even have books Joel

you don't read

[Joel]: bc parents exsist

Anyway

I'll send a pic later

After we get off this mountain

[Gem]: ok! <3

I guess I won't be killing anyone today

Maybe Grian, actually

Yeah, Grian

Hey! @Grian! I'm going to kill you!

[Joel]: I think is phone is dead

[Gem]: Oh

I'll make it a suprise, then

[Joel]: pfft-

[Lizzie]: I love this group chat

"Behold!" Scott declared, holding up a sandwich.

"Uhh," Jimmy said. "It looks... kinda dead."

"How dare you," Scott glared at him. "Because you clearly don't respect this brilliant sandwich, I shall give it to Tango instead."

"Ohh, thank you!" Tango grabbed it and took a bite.

"Wha- no! I'm hungry!" Jimmy complained.

"Well, you shouldn't have complained, then," Scott said, rolling his eyes. "Fine, I'll make you a new sandwich."

"Out of cod this time," Tango added.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Jimmy yelled. Scott stuck his tongue out at him.

[Grian]: What the heck is going on

[Gem]: I'm here to kill you <3

[Grian]: ...

oh

well bye

"Behold! Sandwich number two!" This time, instead of complaining, Jimmy took the sandwich gratefully. Scott lead them both into his backyard to eat ("YOUR GETTING PEANUT BUTTER ON MY FLOOR") on a picnic blanket, just as he promised.

("It's not my fault the sandwich is falling apart!")

("Is too!")

Scott himself ate a few tangerines, as he'd had enough pb&j sandwiches in his life. The sun was warm, as it was slowly creeping into the end of spring, and Scott was actually feeling, well, content.

Yeah, content.

"He fell asleep on my shoulder," Tango hissed. Jimmy muffled his laughter while also almost choking on his sandwich.

"Sounds like a you problem," Jimmy laughed.

"S'not funny," Tango pouted, trying not to wake Scott up. Actually, it would be really easy to wake Scott up, as normal friends would do.

So why didn't he do it?

(Why couldn't he do it?)

This, this didn't make sense.

(He couldn't love two people at the same time, could he?)

Really, did life ever?

Chapter Text

[Martyn]: DID U GUYS HEAR THE ANNOUNCEMENT?

[Lizzie]: We did! Should we enter?

[Martyn]: ABSOLUTELY!!!

[Pearl]: Whatcha guys talking about?

[Martyn]: There’s a competition for writing the play this year

Wouldn’t it be cool if we entered?

[Pearl]: But… what would we enter with?

None of us are really the creative writing type

[Martyn]: So this may sound crazy, but hear me out

[Lizzie]: Yeah?

[Martyn]: What if we submitted 3rd life as the play?

[Pearl]: I see some people are taking an awful amount of time to reply

I mean it’s kinda pure luck we’re all free rn but at least the bad boys should be replying!

[Lizzie]: Maybe they got caught earlier?

We should start discussing without them anyway though

[Martyn]: Speaking of which, would you guys consider also trying out for the play?

As well as the others, they could try out for their actual roles

I know Lizzie and Pearl, u weren’t in it, but I’m sure a few people in our group probably wouldn’t try out anyway so u could fill in

[Lizzie]: Sounds cool, I’m in!

[Pearl]: It’s a maybe for me, not too sure

I don’t really like performing in front of a large audience

Plus, wouldn’t 3rd life be a little, upsetting for, like, the parents or something?

I dunno, because there’s death and stuff

[Martyn]: True, true

[Pearl]: And then there’s our classmates. I mean, the people who wrote the script would be announced, right?

Isn’t like, submitting a play with death and betrayal and stuff like that a bit weird for HIGH SCHOOL?

[Martyn]: Pearl ur in high school too

[Pearl]: But still!

The intensity!

I honestly don’t think I would survive

[Martyn]: I could leave u out

I won’t force u to do something u don’t wanna

Im pretty sure a lot of people in our group feel that way too

[Pearl]: Thank you!

[Martyn]: Pearl, u don’t have to thank me lol

Thats just what friends do for each other, right?

[Joel]: I CANT BELIEVE WE MISSED A WHOLE CONVERSATION

[Grian]: I KNOW RIGHT!!!

WE HAVE BEEN LEFT OUT

THIS IS A CRIME AGAINST HUMANITY

[Joel]: ANYWAY HAVE U READ ALL THE TEXTS YET

I WANTVTO DISCUSS THIS AMAZING IDEA

WHO ELSE IS HERE???

[GRIAN]: AH YES I ALSO “WANIVTO” DISCUSS THIS IDEA

BUT ON A MORE SERIES NOTE, LET US DISCUSS.

[Joel]: I WILL ABSOLUTELY HELP WRITE AND PARTICIPATE IN THE PLAY

[Grian]: YOU WILL NOT HELP WRITE THE PLAY!!!

YOU’RE WRITING IS ATROCIOUS JOEL

YOU WOULD PROBABLY ONLY WRITE “SCAR AND GRIAN SHOULD KISS AND JOEL DEFINITELY ABSOLUTELY WINS”

[Jimmy]: Why r u guys talking in all caps

[Grian]: JIMMY WE ARE HAVING A VERY IMPORTANT CONVERSATION

[Joel]: YEAH!

GET OUT OF HERE, SCRAM!!!

[Jimmy]: MEANIESSSSSS

[Grian]: ON SECOND THOUGHT, LET’S LET HIM STAY

[Joel]: AGREED

ANYWAY

THAT IS ONE HUNDRED PERCENT TRUE THOUGH

SCAR AND GRIAN SHOULD KISS AND JOEL DEFINITELY ABSOLUTELY WINS IS ONE HUNDRED PERCENT ACCURATE AND GREST WRITING

[Jimmy]: WHAT EVEN IS THIS CONVERSATION

[Joel]: THE BEST CONVERSATION EVER

[Cleo]: You guys stop texting this instant or u get it

…

Okay, good, now I can sleep in peace

[Joel]: WHY R U EVEN SLEEPING AT SCHOOL

[Cleo]: 1, it is free period

2, your dead

[Joel]: FAIR ENOUGH, LEAVING NOW!

[Mumbo]: Is everyone here?

We scheduled the meeting today, right?

On the group chat?

[Scar]: Yup!

[Ren]: This is discussing the play thing, right?

[Grian]: PRETTY SURE, YEAH

[Cleo]: You guys still talking like that?

[Joel]: OH ABSOLUTELY

[Lizzie]: I’m so excited!

Arent you guys excited?

I mean, unless you don’t wanna participate

You don’t have to!

[Jimmy]: We’ll I’m not gonna

[Grian]: Whyyyyyyyyyyy

[Jimmy]: Grian!

I have stage fright!

And I am NOT gonna perform this IN FORNT OF THE PARENTS.

[Joel]: Fair enough

The parents would look at us all weird

[Scar]: Guys I have an idea

what about we submit it

but leave it anonymous

[Martyn]: …

Would that work?

[Gem]: It sounds valid…

I mean the school isn’t going to just turn it down if it’s anonymous, is it?

[Jimmy]: The parents will still look at us funny anyway for performing in this play

Also 3rd life might be a too deadly and stuff for a high school play

[Pearl]: See?

Jimmy knows what I mean

[Joel]: We could edit it

make it a more teen-friendly

[Grian]: Look at us teens, being so much more mature than the rest of our grade!

[Pearl]: One day, I will hold that against you.

[Grian]: Thank you for your confidence in me/

[Martyn]: Okay, so, Jimmy and Pearl aren’t participating, we’re gonna edit the story to make it more peaceful, and submit it anonymously, right?

Okay, so what else?

[Cleo]: I won’t participate either

I could be a costume designer though

That would be so cool, designing 3rd life outfits

[Pearl]: Ooooo

I would love to do that too!

[Martyn]: Okay, got that

Maybe we should leave out the less important parts too? To keep it shorter?

[Joel]: Yeah, do that

But keep all the desert duo bits in

I still wanna ship them

[Lizzie]: One hundred percent do that

[Grian]: Sometimes I wonder why I’m friends with all u guys

[Lizzie]: Aww, you love us anyway!

[Martyn]: That reminds me!

We probably would need replacement names for all our “Characters”

[Skizz]: Oh we definitely need those

200000%

I should be called

Wait

gimme a sec

[Joel]: you should call skizz the unfairly tall guy

[Martyn]: Okay, well, that’s one name done

[Skizz]: Wha- fine, as long as I can change it at the end

[Martyn]: Sure

[Gem]: Ooooooh, I can come up with a lot of names!

Like, Grian could be Griande

[Grian]: what

[Gem]: Ren could be… dog

[Ren]: Honestly I don’t know whether to be mad or grateful I’m not named Griande

[Gem]: Scott can be Smajor

[Scott]: Woo!

I got such a good name

[Grian]: Gem I can’t even sing

[Gem]: And Jimmy can be Canary

[Jimmy]: Whoever first started this canary nonsense, I am gonna murder

[Gem]: Tango can be… I dunno honestly, Fire? Tek? Yeah, Tek

Joel is… Yoel

[Joel]: Bit on the edge, ain’t it?

[Gem]: Would u rather be smallbeans?

[Joel]: Honestly, yeah

My dignity is dying but Yoel lives in my mind not in a school play

[Gem]: Well Etho is obviously slab

[Martyn]: Gem u r literally carrying us

[Gem]: You can be littlewood too

[Skizz]: I feel like that without Gem, we’d be dead

[Gem]: Impulse I have absolutely no idea for you

You could try to get Joel to come up with a temporary name for u?

He seems good at that

[Impulse]: Oh yeah, scarily good, honestly

I should pay u for making up such a good name for Skizz

[Joel]: I am rather proud of that

[Martyn]: Everyone, I’m going to send you all a document

Gem, u can add the names there

Everyone else who can, help me write!

Chapter Text

[Ren]: Hey B

[BigB]: ?

[Ren]: You have a pool, right?

[BigB]: Oh yeah, why?

[Ren]: I was thinking about hosting a pool party, but you know, if your pool is bigger maybe we should host it there instead

[BigB]: I have the dimensions of the pool I think?

Maybe in like one of the folders in the garage

[Ren]: Really? That would be helpful

I have no idea how big my pool is

[BigB]: I guess just send a picture, I'll send one too

[Ren]: ok

[Ren]  sent an image.

[BigB] sent an image.

[BigB]: Yours is smaller I think but wow your backyard is ridiculously large

I'd say yours

[Ren]: Alright, I'll start planning for it

You can come over and help if you want

[BigB]: omw

[Pearl]: Guys!

Pool party on the way????

[BigB]: We're working on it

shhhhhhhhh

[Gem]: GUYS POOL PARTY ON THE WAY

[Joel]: HECK YEAH

[Ren]: Guys we're buying snacks what do you want

[Joel]: PRINGLES FOR THE MUSTACHE MAN

[Gem]: Hmm

Yes to the pringles

what about takis?

[Joel]: LAYS CHIPS

[Pearl]: Crackers?

[BigB]: Hold up, we're in the drinks section

[Joel]: COKE

[BigB]: I was gonna ask, but I think you guys got the idea

[Gem]: I'm a fruit juice lemonade person personally

[Pearl]: What even is your budget????

[Ren]: I mean BigB and I are combining how much we're willing to spend and it's around like 100 dollars worth of jumbo packs???

I mean this is pretty much it honestly

Gem we got raspberry lemonade is that ok with you?

[Gem]: Yup!

[BigB]: Gonna check out now!

[BigB]: Pool party's on this Saturday!

[Gem]: YAYYYY

[Lizzie]: I'M GONNA BRING MY CAMERA

[Grian]: I can't believe I missed picking snacks :(

[Joel]: Don't worry there are pringlesssssssssssss

[Grian]: >:0

[Lizzie]: POOL PARTYYYYYYYYYYYY

[Gem]: POOL PARTY POOL PARTY

[Joel]: Guys what if we bring water guns

[Gem]: Joel what have you done

[Grian]: PREPARE TO DIE

[Gem]: JOEL WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

[Joel]: I FORGOT ABOUT HIS JUMBO WATER GUN

[Gem]: HOW DO YOU FORGET THAT????

[Lizzie]: Don't worry, I have an emergency kit ^^

[Gem]: LIZZIE AN EMERGENCY KIT WON'T CUT IT

WE'LL ALL DIEEEEEEEEEEE

[BigB]: Agreed

[Gem]: JOEL WHAT HAVE YOU DONEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Grian]: ;)

[Gem]: ...

Welp

Good luck everyone

Last one standing I will give you a literal reward

And then, Joel, I'm killing you again

[Joel]: Not AGAIN!!!!

[Martyn]: Oh no

I suppose I'll bring my water gun then

[Scott]: There's literally no point

Next comes death and then comes Joel's second death

[Martyn]: Let's kill Grian along with us

That way we won't be the only ones dead

[Scott]: We can try

Chances are he'll kill us twice for that though

[Martyn]: True, true

[Scott]: Kill Joel and Grian together?

[Martyn]: Deal

If I get to deal the final blow

[Scott]: No way

What type of deal is that

[Martyn]: A fair one

[Scott]: What do you mean a fair one???

Obviously I should be the one to kill Grian

[Martyn]: Not if I kill you first

[Scott]: You wouldn't dare

Plus, I would kill you before that happens

[Martyn]: Haha

[Scott]: >:I

[Martyn]: ...

[Scott]: ...

[Martyn]: After we kill Grian?

[Scott]: Of course

After I kill Grian

[Martyn]: What do you mean YOU kill Grian??????

The AUDACITY

[Scott]: >:)

[Grian]: ;)

[Jimmy]: Can someone please tell Gri to stop sending creepy winking faces

[Grian]: ;)

[Jimmy]: NO GRIAN WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[Gem]: 2 days!

[Scar]: GUYS, TWO DAYS!!!

[Gem]: lol, I think they heard, Scar

[Skizz]: One day!

[Impulse]: Ooohhh, I'm so excited

[Grian]: ;)

[Jimmy]: GUYS IT'S TODAYYYYYYYYY

[Ren]: Aaaand, we're open!

[Joel]: LETS GOOOOOOOO

[Gem]: omw

[Lizzie]: Camera ready <3

[Grian]: ;)

[Jimmy]: OH WOULD YOU STOP IT WITH THE WINKING FACES???

Jimmy, who got there first, dived into the pool in a typical Jimmy manner.

"CANONBALL!!!"

"Dude," Ren said, a bit wet from the splash, eating some chips. "You aren't even gonna try some snacks?"

"Nope," Jimmy replied happily. "Just because you guys do doesn't mean everyone does! How do you not swim every day?"

"You get bored of it eventually," said BigB, who has eating goldfish. It's just kinda there your whole life.

Jimmy gave them both a look that suggested that he wanted them to shut up.

Gem arrived next, as she had walked, but was the first to leave. She, too, set down her stuff to do a celebratory cannonball into the pool. She had brang her water gun and proceeded to shoot Jimmy a few times. Ren lended Jimmy a sad baby toy gun to try to defend from her, but he ended up getting dunked anyway.

"Wonder why," BigB laughed, looking at the water gun in Jimmy's hand.

"I have no idea," Ren nodded, faking solemn confusion.

"I'm here!" Pearl walked through the side gate, her arms full of pool noodles which she proceeded to dump on the ground. She had a water gun strapped to her back, and Tilly followed behind her. Tilly then followed Pearl around before she told him he could explore. He then proceeded to greet Ren and ignore everyone else, settling under a tree in Ren's garden.

Pearl, Gem, and Jimmy proceeded to have pool noodle wars with each other while Ren and BigB ate, finishing almost a tenth of the snacks themselves before everyone even arrived.

Joel was the next to arrive, carrying both his and Jimmy's water gun for some reason, and Jimmy screamed "THE CODFATHER'S OUT TO GETCHA!", promptly getting revenge on Gem due to the ridiculously large water gun Joel had given him. Scott and Martyn arrived next, both wearing rather evil grins. They settled themselves at the corner of the pool and did what Ren supposed was evil scheming while devouring the last of the Oreos. ("nooooo, not the Oreossssss")

Lizzie with her camera was next, explaining that there was a kitten in Ren's front yard, and everyone had to see it that instance, no exceptions, who cares if you're wet come on come on it's a CAAAATTTTTT.

Grumbling, Jimmy and Joel trailed behind all of them to see the cat, though Gem and Pearl had no issue getting out of the pool to meet the said kitten. They got their revenge later, though, when Lizzie was in the pool during, ahem, cough cough, a contest.

Impulse and Skizz arrived next, sporting their own water guns. They worked great as a team and Ren was honestly a bit terrified. No matter. He could sit here and eat the whole time and no one could stop him.

Tango was next, with a devilish grin on his face, holding a small beatbox. Ren heard Jimmy mutter a desperate "Oh no" and duck into the water. Then the screeching monkeys started.

When Bdubs arrived, he laughed at the monkey noises and proceeded to turn them up higher, much to everyone expect Tango and Bdub's horror. Etho came in and took one look at the scene before bursting into laughter, rolling on the floor even. Joel, who had never seen Etho laugh like that before, ducked into the water and told himself over and over again that he was fine and he was not going to panic because Etho looked hot.

Cleo was even worse that Etho, and promptly died on the spot when she entered the backyard. Tilly made some snorting noises at the loud "music" and laughter, and buried his nose into his arm.

Mumbo was next, and he took one look at the party and put his head in his head, sobbing "why did I agree to this why." Skizz grinned and dragged him towards the pool.

Scar, who had been held back because of "STUPID HOMEWORK, I WANTED TO GET HERE IMMEDIANTLY", followed the actions of Jimmy, Gem, and Joel, and ran straight for the pool, cannonballing before anyone could even register he had arrived. He playfully used his water gun to shoot everyone in the pool, who was mostly everyone.

Except Ren, who was still sitting at the table with BigB.

He was anticipating Grian's arrival.

And sure enough, at exactly 11:00, he showed up, dressed into the most ridiculous "I'm an evil guy costume" sporting the largest water gun anyone had ever seen. Ren stopped him before he could get on with the murdering.

"Let's have a contest," he declared.

It was basically the hunger games. Jimmy looked like he was about to die after the rules were all established. Scott and Martyn still had the same evil look, but nothing could top Grian's.

"Okay, everyone ready?" BigB asked. He waited until they nodded until proceeding. "Alright then, three, two, one..."

"Go!"

"AAAHHHHH," Jimmy yelled as Grian hid him straight in the chest. He sputtered indignantly at Grian, but he had already proceeded to target Impulse. Jimmy grumbled and sat down at the table, eating Pringles.

Mumbo was next, very much dragged into the whole ordeal by Grian. He looked affronted that Ren and BigB had even purchased the Pringles, and ate lays instead.

"I can't believe I'm out," Lizzie wailed as she joined them. She was soaked from head to toe due to Scott.

"I have some murdering to do after this," was what Cleo said when she joined.

"I imagine you do," Lizzie agreed.

Etho sat down with a frown, but maybe it was because he was so wet he looked like a sad puppy.

Skizz and Impulse came down together, yelling "AT LEAST WE GOT ETHO!"

Tango came next, and proceeded to kick rocks instead of eat Pringles.

BigB went down after falling into the pool dodging one of Grian's shots. Many would argue that was a better fate than being hit by Grian himself.

Joel got killed by Scott after repeatedly trying to hit him. "Evil bastard," was what Joel said when he joined the Pringle eating.

Gem was dead after Scar shot her in the back. She sighed and joined the table without too many complaints. At least eating Pringles was very entertaining. Mumbo kept trying to prove that he was not a Pringles man, and Grian WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME.

Ren went down after Scott dealt another hit when he was cornered. Everyone was anticipating Scott and Grian's battle at this point.

Pearl, down. Shot by Grian.

Scar, down, shot by Scott.

Bdubs went down, shot by Grian.

And there were three left.

"I'm taking you down, Grian!" Scott yelled, and everyone except Joel cheered in agreement. Joel booed.

"We'll se about that," Grian said, then winking. Literally winking. Jimmy collapsed in sobs next to Joel, who was still booing.

Scott barely dodged Grian's first spray.

Grian easily side-stepped Scott's. Grian aimed, and...

"SPLASH!"

"Martyn?!" Grien exclaimed, as Martyn dumped a bucket of water on Scott. He sputtered under the sudden impact and Martyn immediately took advantage of Grian's shock, swiftly picking up his water gun and spraying Grian in the face. With a satisfied smirk, he watched Grian get hit with indignant rage, before both he and Scott stalked back to the snack table, grumbling.

"Told you so!" Martyn called as Scott glared at him.

Eventually, they began to leave.

Ren watched them.

Gem, Mumbo, Impulse, Pearl, even Cleo and BigB, after Cleo had murdered everyone again and BigB had helped throw away all the paper plates.

Eventually, everyone left.

Except one person.

"You still here?" Ren asked, raising an eyebrow. He was picking up the pool noodles Pearl had told him to keep as a gift for hosting them.

"Yup," Martyn said, grinning. "Basking in my winning glory." Ren laughed and stacked the pool noodles up.

"Now you aren't," Ren said, squirting Martyn with the toy water gun he had given Jimmy in the beginning. "See, I've won." Martyn gave him a playful shove and took the water gun to shoot Ren himself.

"Aren't you even going to go for a swim?" he asked, as Ren sat next to him by the pool.

"I have, see?" he gestured to his soaking clothes.

"No, you haven't," Martyn insisted. "Those are from the water guns."

"Well, swimming is overrated anyway," Ren shrugged.

"Nuh uh," Martyn elbowed him again, grinning. "Swimming is fantastic. It's just been normalized for you."

"Sure," Ren said, shrugging.

"Alright, you're coming in," Martyn said, tugging Ren towards the pool.

"Hey!" Ren protested. Martyn gave him a pointed look that said "You better follow me" before jumping into the pool. Ren sighed and took his shirt off, jumping in after him.

They both resurfaced, next to each other, and both burst out laughing.

"Told you it was worth it," Martyn chortled, giving him the biggest "told you so" look ever. Ren just floated next to him, still chuckling. They swam for a while before the backyard lights lit up, and it was nearing sunset. Then, the climbed out of the pool and dried off.

They ended up returning to where they started, and sitting side by side again at the edge of the pool, dipping their feet, both with towels draped around them. They sat in silence, and the more Ren sat there the more embarrassed he felt until he was blushing. Martyn was just sitting there, and yet Ren suddenly felt the urge to go closer and kiss him.

"What?" Martyn said, raising an eyebrow.

"Uhh, sorry," Ren said, staring. Oh, he was so obviously staring stop staring Ren-

"Just, uhh, youlookreallyhot?" he stammered, then clapped his hand over is mouth.

Martyn just stared. Then laughed. Ren blushed harder and looked down, stupid stupid stupid-

"Hey, you're the one who's not wearing a shirt, you're one to talk," Martyn said, grinning. Ren's head snapped up, his eyes widened. This couldn't be happening, could it.

"I am going to kiss you," Martyn informed him, and then he did. Ren tensed up, shocked by the turn of events, and oh, he was kissing Martyn Littlewood. He was kissing him!

Martyn broke away, concerned. "Was that okay? I know I didn't exactly ask," he babbled, before Ren kissed him back, and then they sat there, by the edge of the pool, leaning against each other, before it was officially nighttime.

He had kissed Martyn Littlewood.

Chapter Text

[Lizzie]: Guys what if

what if

[Gem]: ?

[Lizzie]: What if BOWLING???

[Gem]: Sounds cool, I'm in

[Lizzie]: YESSSSSSS

[Martyn]: What's with the sudden fascination?

[Lizzie]: Well,

a, BOWLING

b, I've never been bowling,

and c, Joel has babbled enough about it in my face that I need to try it myself

[Martyn]: Wow

Just wow

[Joel]: The betrayal

Like

How could u lizzie

how could u do this to me

your own best friend???

[Lizzie]: You deserved it :p

[Joel]: BETRAYALLLLLLLL!!!

[Martyn]: L

[Gem]: Sounds like a you problem honestly

[Joel]: :'(

Everyone is so mean to me todayyyyyy

[Lizzie]: I wonder why

[Gem]: OOOOOO BURRNNNNN

[Joel]: I'm going to cry now

[Martyn]: ok

[Joel]: ...

[Gem]: wow

[Lizzie]: <3

[Martyn]: :D

[Grian]: Question for you guys:

You and a snail are given $1,000,000, and are now immortal. The only problem is that if the snail touches you, you die. The snail always knows where you are and is constantly moving towards you. How would you defeat the immortal snail?

[Jimmy]: ????

Grian why

[Grian]: Don't ask me!!

I found it on reddit!

[Jimmy]: ???

ok

uhh

hmmmm

[Grian]: Can u actually say something

[Jimmy]: I'm thinking!

...

[Grian]: Then stop thinking so loudly

[Jimmy]: HEY!

[Joel]: Don't worry guys I have amazing reflexes no way that snail is ever touching me

[Grian]: suuurrrreeeeeeee

[Joel]: >:(

[Gem]: I think I can beat a snail

[Grian]: You guys aren't answering the question!!

How would you DEFEAT the snail????!!

[Joel]: Why would I try to defeat it?

Snails are cute

[Grian]: ...

[Jimmy]: I suppose you could drown it?

[Grian]: Tim its IMMORTAL

[Jimmy]: Then how am I supposed to defeat it??????

[Joel]: Jimmy jimmy

Of course you can't drown it

you would drown instead

obviously

[Gem]: What Joel said

Obviously

[Jimmy]: ???????????????????

whyYYYY??????????

[Grian]: ...

@everyone

can someone who has a brain actually respond to this question??

[Tango]: Set it on fire

[Grian]: How many people DID NOT GET THE MEMO THAT THE SNAIL IS IMMORTAL????

[Tango]: Put it in a box and set it on fire

[Grian]: ...

[Scott]: Why

[Grian]: ?

[Scott]: ...

ok bye

[Grian]: ??????

[Gem]: You should drop it off in the middle of the ocean :)

[Grian]: uhhhhh

[Joel]: It would still drown

[Gem]: Ohh yeah

uhh

You should just put it in a box and THEN drop it in the middle of the ocean

:)

[Tango]: Box supremacy

[Ren]: Oh I thought of a really good one

Just dump cement onto it

[Grian]: ...

I applaud you

That's the only one that has made sense so far

[Ren]: In a box

[Grian]: ...

Nevermind

[Lizzie]: Silly silly!

Just don't accept the money!

[Grian]: That's not an option???

[Lizzie]: It is now

#idonthaveamilliondollarsbutimnotdeadclub

[Ren]: Thats a good idea

but I still think the cement thing would work

[Pearl]: Gary

[Grian]: what???

[Pearl]: SlimeadarityGaming

[Jimmy]: wha

hey!

[Pearl]: Tangastropod

[Tango]: ...

[Grian]: Pearl why

[Pearl]: RenTheSnail

[Grian]: PEARL WHY

[Pearl]: Wouldn't u like to know

[Grian]: ...

Pearlescentsnail

[Pearl]: !!!

[Joel]: haha

RIP

[Lizzie]: Bowling this Friday!

Just a reminder <3

[Scar]: ok! Got it!

[Pearl]: eSCARgo

[Scar]: ...?

[Scott]: What is this

[Pearl]: Smollusk1995

[Scott]: ...

We all agree that she's crazy, right?

[Joel]: Guys Grian is missing from class

Guys what do you think happened

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

respond pls

guys

guys

[Jimmy]: JOEL WHAT ARE YOU DOING FISBDISLBD

[Joel]: oh good

Jimmy where is Grian

[Jimmy]: I dunno??!

[Joel]: That's not very helpful :/

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

[Jimmy]: NO STOP

[Joel]: guys

guys

oh

why?

[Jimmy]: Stop spamming >:(

[Joel]: ...

How about no

guys

guys

guys

[Jimmy]: ARRGGGGGGGGG

[Scott]: Joel what the hell are you doing

[Joel]: hmm

not the guy I was looking for but whatever

Do you know where Grian is?

[Scott]: No

[Joel]: OH COME ON

I knew you would be no help :/

guys

guys

[Scott]: wow

[Joel]: guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

[Grian]: why do I have 49 new messages???

[Joel]: GRIAN

GRIAN WHERE ARE YOU

GRIAN ARE YOU DEAD

[Grian]: No???

[Joel]: THEN GRIAN WHERE ARE YOUSVB

[Grian]: ...

The hospital

[Joel]: !!!

guys

guys

guys

Grian is dying

guys

lets hear an o7 for Grian he's dying he's dying

[Grian]: What???

No im not

[Joel]: Of course you are you're in the hospital

GUYS

GRIAN IS DYING AND HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW IT

[Grian]: ...

Its just my yearly check-up

[Joel]: DEATH!!! AND STUFF!!

DEATH AND STUFF!!!

[Grian]: wow ok lol

[Joel]: WHY IS NO ONE ELSE REPLYING

[Jimmy]: BECAUSE they're in class

[Joel]: guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

guys

[Jimmy]: ARGHGGGHGHGHGHGGGHGHHHH

[Lizzie]: BOWLING TODAY, AFTERSCHOOL

EVERYONE, MEET!!

:DDDDDDDD

[Scar]: <3

[Joel]: Guys im sorry but Grian won't be able to attend

he died yesterday because he touched his immortal snail

[Pearl]: Gary

[Joel]: ah yes

how could I forget

he touched his immortal snail Gary

[Scar]: poor grian

dsuivbyiwdosafvdiwersfveiwrlbsvf

[Scar] was killed by [eSCARgo]

[Grian]: ?????????????

What just happened????????????????????

[Pearl]: were all the question marks necessary?

[Grian]: yes??????????????????

[Lizzie]: I may have... messed with the group chat a bit??

[Grian]: LIZZIE WHAT DID YOU DO

[Grian] was slain by [Gary]

[Joel]: o7

[Pearl]: o7

[Lizzie]: o7

[Grian] --> [Joel]

[Grian]: Joel that kicked me out

[Joel]: lol

[Grian]: wait

with me gone, who's mod???

[Joel]: You'll never guess who

[Grian]: oh no

IT'S NOT YOU, IS IT???

[Joel]: Nah

[Grian]: oh thank goodness

Then who is it?

[Joel]: :)

[Grian]: TELLL MEEEEEEEE

[Joel]: Martyn

[Grian]: uh

oh

OH GOSH NOO

[Martyn] changed the name [Desert Duo Ship] to [EHEHE GUESS WHAT!!!]

[Joel]: welp I'm prepared to die

[Martyn]: as you should be

>:)

[Martyn] changed the name [EHEHE GUESS WHAT!!!] to [💀💀💀RED WINTER IS COMING💀💀💀]

[Joel]: Was that really necessary

[Martyn]: yes

[Joel] ok well uh

oh look at the time!

I have history soon!

well bye!

[Martyn]: wow lol

[Lizzie]: should I me worried?

[Martyn]: nah

[Lizzie]: ok <3!

Well can you change Joel's name to smol bean?

[Martyn]: Sure

[Martyn] changed [Joel]'s name to [smol bean]

[smol bean]: NOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT WHY

I HATE YOU

[Martyn]: change it back and you're a pussy

[smol bean]: >:((((((((

"Joel can you please please please tell Martyn to add me back," Grian complained on their way to the bowling alley.

"No can do," Joel replied, a few steps ahead of him.

"WHYYYYYYY," Grian groaned, pouting.

"My name is ALREADY SMALL BEAN," he complained back, waving his hands around. "I'm not getting into MORE trouble!"

"Fine," Grian muttered, as they rounded the corner and pushed open the door to building.

The bowling place smelled a bit too much like cigarettes and stinky feet, but it wasn't like there was another one real close to their town. Joel flopped down onto a chair next to Impulse and Tango, who had already arrived, and were talking enthusiastically.

It took only a few minutes for everyone to arrive, and due to their large numbers, they all split into groups of three, with Joel, Gem, and Pearl on one, Grian, Skizz, and Mumbo on another, Lizzie, Scar, Jimmy on the lane to their left, Martyn, Ren, and Impulse on their right, Etho, Bdubs, and Tango down two lanes, with Cleo, Scott, and BigB at the end. Some people shot the giant group funny looks due to the sheer amount of lanes they were taking up, but Joel frankly didn't care and just continued on with his game.

He started out strong, with an eight followed by a one on the first round, which he thought was pretty solid, but Gem followed that up with a spare, which was pretty infuriating to see on the leaderboard. And to think they were only half a round in.

Pearl got a total of seven on her turn, and it just wen't downhill from there.

It wasn't that he wasn't getting anything better than a nine, no, it was that since that nine, he hadn't gotten a single one since. He was now on a streak of twos and threes, and it was already round seven. Standing at the terrible score of thirty-seven, Gem's eight-four definitely wasn't helping, nor was Pearl's forty-nine. He sat, stony-faced, as he waited for his turn, right after Pearl.

It wasn't his fault he was doing so poorly! Jimmy had come over multiple times to yell in his ear, and that really messed his shots up. Yup, it was all Jimmy's fault, and now he was loosing.

"Go Jimmy!" Scar cheered.

"Yeah! You got this!" Lizzie hollered after him.

Three.

Gutter-ball.

"Just admit it," Jimmy grumbled, trudging back to his seat. "I'm trash at this."

"Well, Joel isn't doing any better," Scar pointed out.

"Well, he would be, but I guess I am keeping him back a bit." Speaking of which, it was Joel's turn. Maybe Jimmy should go and annoy him right now.

It was Lizzie's turn, and seeing how he had just went, he sneaked back towards Joel, planning to startle him. Instead, Joel spotted him instantly and Jimmy knew he wasn't going to tolerate anything from him now.

Joel flung the ball at the pins and proceeded to spin on his heels and run after Jimmy, who ran towards Grian, because Grian was usually a good distraction. However, over the hubbub of the room, he heard Scar calling his name.

"Jim! Jimmy! It's your turn!"

Shoot.

Jimmy turned to a stop and pivoted, running back towards his lane, snatching a random ball off a rack. Joel was catching up, so once he neared Lizzie and Scar, he dived to the ground and shoved the ball in front of him, with Joel only a few seconds behind him. Jimmy expected him to proceed to wrestle Jimmy, but instead, he saw Joel was looking at his bowling ball, which had-

Oh wow.

What in the-

"A STRIKE??" Joel yelled, flabbergasted. He glared at Jimmy, and ran back to his lane, as he hadn't finished his turn, but Jimmy didn't chase after him, because if he had gotten a strike, that meant-

He was ahead of Scar.

By only one point, yes, but he was still ahead.

"YESSSSS!!" He yelled, and Lizzie laughed next to him and hugged him.

"YESSSSS!!" Joel, who had been getting ready for his roll, in his "this will totally make me win this game" position, jumped when he heard the scream. Of course it was Jimmy. Of course it was. Now, Jimmy was ahead of him, and also Scar, by the looks of it, and Joel would not stand for this.

He readied himself, yet again back in his "this will totally make me win this game" position, and rolled the ball at a satisfying speed.

It was a bit skewed.

"ARRGGGGG," Joel grumbled, still watching the ball even though he knew it was going to miss. At least it wouldn't go into the gutter, which was a relief, because it would knock over hopefully at least one pin, but-

Wait a minute.

"Is it curving?!" Joel yelled, startled. No way he had just done a curveball. He hadn't even realized that he had done so, and he also had been too scared to try it when he couldn't even aim his regular rolls.

And yet, it was curving.

And sure enough,

Hit.

"THAT WAS MY FIRST SPARE!" Joel yelled, ecstatic. He spun around, and yelled some more as Gem stepped up for her next roll. "HEY! HEY, JIM, IN YOUR FACE!" 

Chapter Text

[Grian] --> [Joel]

[Grian]: Joel add me back pleaaasssseeeeeeee

[Joel]: why

[Grian]: JOEEEELLLLLLLLLLL

JOEL PLEASE

JOEL I'LL CHANGE YOUR NAME BACK TO JOEL AND NOT SMOL BEAN

[Joel]: HOW do you even know that my name is smol bean????

[Grian]: Joel you literally told me that

[Joel]: ...

are you sure?

[Grian]: How else would I even know????

[Joel]: idk

hacking???

that seems like something you would do

[Grian]: Then why aren't I hacking myself back into the gc

[Joel]: bc you're stupid

[Grian]: Joel :(

[Joel]: haha L could never be me

[Grian]: :'(

[Joel]: fine

how much are you willing to pay??

[Grian]: What

Joel I'm not going to PAY you to add me back

[Joel]: fine then

bye

[Grian]: NO WAIT

Uhhhhhhhh

1 cent???

Texting in --> [💀💀💀RED WINTER IS COMING💀💀💀]

[Joel]: @inthelittlewood

@inthelittlewood

@inthelittlewood

[Martyn]: Joel shut up

[Joel]: how much are you willing to pay to keep Grian out of the group chat

[Martyn]: idc

like

1 cent???

[Joel]: sorry Grian offered that much already

[Martyn]: ok two cents then

[Joel] --> [Grian]

[Joel]: Grian I'm sorry he offered me more money

[Grian]: HOW MUCH MORE

[Joel]: not sayin

[Grian]: Joel

Joel

Joel

JOEL

FINE

I'LL PAY FIVE DOLLARS

IS THAT ENOUGH??

[Joel]: haha yup

Texting in --> [💀💀💀RED WINTER IS COMING💀💀💀]

[Joel] added [Grian] to the chat.

[Joel]: welcome back!!

pay me tomorrow or else

[Martyn]: Wow, how much did you manage to get out of him?

[Joel]: Five dollars

@LDshadowlady THAT BETTER BE ENOUGH TO PAY FOR THAT PILLOW OR WHATEVER IT WAS

I FORGOF

[Grian]: Joel are you suffering from memory loss

[Joel]: nO

[Grian]: Also I'm not admin

[Joel]: yeah so?

[Grian]: what do you mean "yeah so"

[Joel]: wtf am I supposed to do about that???

I'M not the admin

[Grian]: ...

[Martyn]: Don't look at me!

[Joel]: Mate I think it's too late

but don't worry

He can't see you through his phone

we're texting

[Martyn]: blah blah blah I'm Joel and I think I'm so smart

[Grian]: also he's suffering from memory loss

[Joel]: I AM NOT

[Pearl]: Laser tag on Tuesday!

You guys excited for the break?

[Lizzie]: oooo sounds fun!

and yes, I am excited!!

[Pearl]: I'll send the address place thing later, Tilly's been kind of restless and we're on a rather chaotic walk

[Lizzie]: No worries <3

[Skizz]: Oooooooo

You bet that I'm going!

[Pearl]: yayyy :D

We are a rather large group, I hope they do have big enough teams

[Bdubs]: Hello!

What are we talking about?

[Lizzie]: Laser tag!

[Bdubs]: wait wait Wait

Is it that place down the road?? Like it was called rockets or somethin

[Pearl]: woah wait, it is!

[Joel]: cool cool don't mind me just collecting some info

[Lizzie]: ???

Joel get back here

what're you doing >:(

[Joel]: nothing

[Lizzie]: Joel!

[Skizz]: Hey! What time is the laser tag?

[Pearl]: 10:00am

And Lizzie, I don't think he's coming back

[Lizzie]: Don't worry I'll kill him later

[Scott]: hello

[Jimmy]: Hi!!

[Joel]: Scott it's your PE PERIOD AGAIN

[Scott]: yeah so?

[Joel]: I swear

you are the stupidest person I've ever met

[Scott]: ...yeah?

anyway, did you hear about that rumor that they're adding a dance unit to the PE curriculum this year? Well, it's true

[Joel]: oh no

NOOOOOOOOOO

[Scott]: That's right, we're in the gym again

don't worry I have a jacket with pockets this time

anyway

we're doing line dancing first and then swing dancing

I'm not actually absorbing a lot of this info wait

[Joel]: haha you can't multitask

that's stupid

you're stupid

[Jimmy]: noooo I don't want to dance

[Grian]: what is this I'm hearing

wait

AMUSEMENT PARK

[Gem]: HUH????

[Grian]: ah yes Gem

Hi

We are discussing the very important topic of dance units in PE

[Gem]: Oh, sure?

But you mentioned amusement parks

[Joel]: haha

[Grian]: I needed to summon more people, and you're the only person I know how to summon

[Gem]: ...

you couldn't try "@"ing people?

[Joel]: ooooooo

[Grian]: nope

Also Joel you are SO ANNOYING

anyway

WE HAVE A DANCE UNIT TO TALK ABOUT

[Scott]: ok I have news

electric slide

[Joel]: what is that

[Jimmy]: huh???

[Gem]: wait wait I know what that is!

[Grian]: what is it

[Gem]: oh you don't wanna know

[Joel]: but what if I do though

[Scott]: no you don't

anyway

OOHH NO

I DID NOT PAY ATTENTION TO THE MOVES

UHHHHH

BE BACK WHEN I'M DONE FAILING

[Jimmy]: I'm a bit worried, honestly

[Gem]: With good reason

[Grian]: Gem stop doing this to me

[Gem]: you're the one you summoned me

[Grian]: You're the one who got summoned

[Gem]: That's a stupid argument and you know it

[Joel]: Grian, you got to admit, she's right

[Grian]: Okay, yeah, you got me there

[Jimmy]: I think I perfected sneak texting

[Joel]: your technique is NOTHING compared to mine

[Grian]: nuh uh mine is superior

[Gem]: guys

guys you amateurs

I'm texting you guys during science right now

We're doing a LAB

[Joel]: ...

[Jimmy]: okay

yeah

[Grian]: cool

maybe

[Joel]: IS THAT A CHALLENGE???

[Jimmy]: that's a bit impossible

[Joel]: no Jim, it is not

I will disprove you

I am SUPIRIOR

[Grian]: lol your spelling

[Joel]: not like yours is any better

"betrayel"

[Grian]: No mentioning that

I will ban you

[Joel]: but you're not admin!

[Grian]: ...

I HATE MY LIFEEEEEEE

also wait

[Grian] added [GoodTimesWithScar] to the chat.

Pretty sure Scar's phone is dead but I'll add him now anyway

[Scott]: no no, you really don't hate your life, because you have PE after me

treasure your life when you still have time

[Grian]: :(

[Gem]: yes

electric slide will ruin your life

[Cleo]: hey

[Gem]: Hi Cleo!

[Cleo]: Are you guys talking about the new dance?

[Gem]: yeah

[Jimmy]: Cleo should I be scared

[Cleo]: nah

It's to that bad honestly, but it's definitely probably not something you want to be doing

[Jimmy]: that helps like

a bit

[Cleo]: k

[Etho]: ring

[Joel]: ETHO HOW

ETHO HOW

ETHO HOW

[Grian]: haha

but also

yes I need your power

[Etho]: do none of you guys own a watch??

[Jimmy]: My watch can do that???

[Etho]: uhh maybe???

I dunno

Anyway it's passing period I need to go!

Chapter Text

[Grian]: It's PE time for me

Wish be luck

[Lizzie]: Luck!

[Grian]: eehhhhhhh this is already weird

At least Mumbo's here with me

[Joel]: Grian stop ruining my perfect life

I do not want to hear about this electric slide thing

electric slide? what's that?

I know no such thing.

[Grian]: what

[Joel]: >:(

one more word and you're dead

[Grian]: Word

[Joel]: POW!

[Lizzie]: oh noOOOoooO

[Grian]: Anyway Joel it's your science period, isn't it?

Let's see you try to pull off that phone sneak

[Joel]: YES

I WILL SHOW YOU I AM SUPIRIOR

[Lizzie]: Not again!

[Grian]: Joel, Joel, joel

[Joel]: Be careful Grian, you know what's coming

[Grian]: You know what? I have suddenly forgotten what I was talking about! Must have been nothing

[Joel]: that's right

wait a minute

Lizzie you share science with me

[Lizzie]: yeah

[Joel]: !!!

I WILL NOT BE BEATEN

I WILL WIN THIS COMPETITION

[Grian]: yeah nah

I bet five dollars no

[Joel]: HISBDIOSBDIOSBDOSBDOSD

[Lizzie]: wait

[Grian]: ?

[Gem]: Guys I have free period

Gonna watch the world burn rn

[Lizzie]: ok ok

[Grian]: LIZZIE GET TO THE POINT

[Lizzie]: no im gonna get caught

[Grian]: fair point

[Gem]: Don't mind me

I should be studying for science tbh, the test is after break

[Grian]: yeah

I swear I'm gonna fail

[Gem]: LIESSSS

LIEESSSSS

[Lizzie]: he got caught

cost clear, he's pouting

I'll return in a bit

[Grian]: dude

It's not even been like five minutes

[Gem]: he's just so trash/pos

[Lizzie]: can confirm, the lab hasn't even started yet

[Grian]: that's some failure alright

do I get my five dollars

[Gem]: no one bet against you though

[Grian]: :(

oop

time to head to the gym

I forgot my PE shorts at home nooo

[Gem]: ohhh that's bad

who do you have again?

[Grian]: Mr. K

[Gem]: OHHH GRIAN

YOUR GRADES

[Grian]: I KNOW

I TRIED TO CONVINCE MUMBO TO FAIL PE WITH ME BUT THE STUPID MAN BROUGHT HIS SHORTS

[Gem]: You don't have sweatpants???

[Grian]: I FORGOT THOSE TOO

[Gem]: You didn't bother to mention this DURING your changing time?

Instead of when you're heading towards the gym???

[Grian]: wasn't important

Anyway

I hope my grade doesn't drop by too much

I'm already one of those weirdos standing in the corner doing nothing during dodgeball GEM YOU HAVE TO HELP ME

[Gem]: uhh uhh

[Grian]: VERY HELPFUL

[Gem]: Grian!!

[Lizzie]: tbh (kinda off topic) I can't imagine mumbo in shorts

[Grian]: LIZZIE

[Lizzie]: What?

[Grian]: aaaaaaaoaoaoaoooooaoaoajaaeeeeaaaahh

[Gem]: ummmmm

[Lizzie]: rip

[Grian]: Guys beware the electric slide

[Gem]: This is funny to me because I haven't had PE yet but I know what it is

[Grian]: why do I need to KNOW THIS

[Lizzie]: scary

Gem on a scale from 1 to 10 how scared should I be

[Gem]: I mean

like a 4?

[Grian]: reminder guys they have swing dancing too

[Jimmy]: Is that true or not I dunno

I mean Scott said so but why would they add it THIS YEAR D:

[Grian]: I mean they said it's like 70% happening

our teachers are very prepared you see

They have not decided it it's going to happen or not

[Gem]: Makes total sense

[Jimmy] (replying to [Grian]: I swear I'm gonna fail): Grian that is a lie and you know it

[Gem]: RIGHT?????

And he says that before every test! Like I swear!

[Jimmy]: This man!

[Grian]: Guys please

I didn't study

[Gem]: Grian you never study!!

[Jimmy]: Remember that time where we had a math test

[Gem]: How could I forget

[Jimmy]: and Grian got a stinking hundred even though he hadn't studied

[Gem]: I can here him now

[Grian]: I can't tell if I'm being complimented or not...

[Gem]: "ohhhhhh nooooooo guys I completely forgot about the test! I can't believe it, I just know I'm gonna fail!!"

[Jimmy]: I remember I was angry enough to punch you that day

[Grian]: ...

OH SHOOT

THEY'RE DEMONSTRATING THE DANCE

[Gem]: o7

wait

you survived not having your pe clothes???

[Grian]: no

but we're ignoring that

[Gem]: GRIAN!!!!

[Jimmy]: At least I have it after lunch

[Grian]: Timmy I will kill you

[Jimmy]: aww why?

[Grian]: Anyway, know that Timmy is dead,

I recorded a video with my awesome skills Joel does not have

Do you guys wanna see the dance

[Jimmy]: oh no

[Gem]: I mean I already know it

[Grian]: What! No one wants to see it??

[Gem]: Haha

[Lizzie]: I would, but I don't think I'd be able to watch it until after the lab

[Grian]: BetrayAl

[Gem]: okay that's just lame

[Grian]: this is the saddest day of my life

I just might die of sadness

[Gem]: It's your own fault really

[Jimmy]: Griaaaannnn

I can't read the galactic on the board

WHAT DOES THIS SAYYYYYYY

[Jimmy] sent an image.

[Grian]: Jimmy your galactic

You need to keep up

[Jimmy]: sorryyyy

[Grian]: Anyway it says "My computer broke this afternoon. Do you know how to fix it?"

[Jimmy]: ok thanks

[Grian]: How much were you able to read in the first place?

[Gem]: See, this is why I chose not to learn a second language

[Jimmy]: My ___ ___ this afternoon. Do you know how to ___ it?

[Grian]: Jimmy!!

[Gem]: Like, too much work. History is so much easier

[Jimmy]: Gonna have to disagree with you there

[Grian]: Gem

Galactic is a free A for me

I'm completely fluent in it

[Gem]: Okay, sure, for you maybe

Jimmy looks like he's struggling

[Jimmy]: Well, I know some galactic

I can understand everything SPOKEN, but my reading is a bit weaker and my writing is, well

[Grian]: abysmal

[Jimmy]: Okay, fine, abysmal

[Grian]: Plus, once you know a second language, you can do this:

ꖎ𝙹ꖎ ⊣ᒷᒲ ᓵᔑリ'ℸ ̣  ∷ᒷᔑ↸ ℸ ̣ ⍑╎ᓭ ⍑ᔑ⍑ᔑ⍑ᔑ⍑ᔑ⍑ᔑ⍑ᔑ⍑ᔑ

[Jimmy]: I ℸ ̣ ⍑╎リꖌ i ⊣𝙹ℸ ̣  ᒲ𝙹ᓭℸ ̣  𝙹⎓ ℸ ̣ ⍑ᔑℸ ̣

[Gem]: Hmmm

you know I can just translate that right

[Grian]: yeah but it's not the same

what if we started talking in galactic in front of you one day

wouldn't that be hilarious

[Gem]: wow, hilarious

also, very mature, grian

[Jimmy]: ⊣ᒷᒲ ||𝙹⚍ ᓭ⍑𝙹⚍ꖎ↸ ꖎᒷᔑ∷リ ⊣ᔑꖎᔑᓵℸ ̣ ╎ᓵ リᒷ ̇/ℸ ̣  ||ᒷᔑ∷

I'm not entirely sure that I got Gem's name right I just inferred from Grian's blanks

[Grian]: yeah it's right

[Jimmy]: YESSSSS

[Lizzie]: I took history to avoid having galactic 1 with Joel and Scott in the same room

I do not want to know what that class is like

[Gem]: Wait that's the best argument actually

Here I share free period with Scott I'll try to get him to answer

[Grian]: ok Tim

[Jimmy]: yeah?

[Grian]: wait

OOP

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[Jimmy]: ?

[Grian]: I HAVE TO DANCEEEEEEEEEE

[Jimmy]: oof

[Grian]: NOOOOOOO ANYTHING BUT THISSSSSS

PLEASSEEEEEE

MUMBO MUMBO'S NOT HELPINGGGGG

MUMBO'S FINE WITH DANCINGGGGGGGGGG

THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFFEEEEEEEEEE

[Jimmy]: Grian you'll survive

[Grian]: TIM WOULD YOU SURVIVE??????

[Jimmy]: no

[Grian]: JIMMY THEY'RE STARTING THE MUSIC

AND IT'S TERRIBLE

THE MUSIC HURTS MY EARS

[Jimmy]: What am I supposed to do????

[Grian]: IDK

SOMETHING

[Gem]: update: I found Scott, all he said was "nope" and walked away

[Jimmy]: what did you ask?

[Gem]: what galactic 1 was like with Joel in it

[Jimmy]: I want to know who's better at galactic

[Gem]: I could try to catch up with him now

Gimme a minute

[Jimmy]: Grian how's it going?

[Lizzie]: lab's done! Now we're just taking notes on the lab

[Jimmy]: absolutely crazy that you made it through that

[Lizzie]: not really, I texted like twice during the lab because I was going to get caught, Gem was texting the entire time during the lab

[Gem]: Well at least you didn't get caught

[Lizzie]: true

[Scott]: Gem stop screaming "SCOTT GET BACK HERE!!!" at the top of your lungs

I can see you sprinting around the campus like a madman

[Gem]: scott

Scott where are you

[Scott]: Gem I'm trying to do work

[Gem]: unlikely

you were reading when I found you the first time

[Scott]: reading IS work!

[Gem]: debatable

[Lizzie]: Non debatable reading is amazing

[Gem]: I mean like the books the school assigns are terrible though. They're either terribly boring or have the most annoying pacing ever

Like EVER

[Jimmy]: Wait Gem

were you in ms. c's class last year?

[Gem]: OMG YES

MAPLE SYRUP THIS MAPLE SYRUP THAT STOP WITH THE MAPLE SYRUPS ALREADY I WANT TO KNOW HOW HE DIED!!!

[Lizzie]: See, I was not in Ms. C's class last year what are you guys talking about?

[Jimmy]: Did you ever finish the book?

[Gem]: Yes

BUT IT WAS TORTURE

[Jimmy]: I got halfway

I know Joel only got two pages in, so I think halfway was pretty decent

[Gem]: no halfway is actually good

I think most people jumped ship a few chapters in anyway

[Jimmy]: but yeah

they were obsessed with maple syrup for some reason

wait

then you know who the murderer was right? who was it?

[Gem]: Jimmy, I'm going to hold your hand when I say this

they never revealed it

[Jimmy]: you're joking

[Gem]: no, I'm not

it dragged on until the next book(s)? I forgot if there were two or three in the series

but

the point is that I never found out

[Jimmy]: AND YOU READ THE WHOLE THING????

[Gem]: see?

bad pacing

[Lizzie]: you know what

I heard that Ms. C was a really nice teacher but

I'm kinda glad reading wasn't ruined for me

I would be pretty mad if I didn't know the murderer in one book

if that's what you guys are talking about?

[Jimmy]: yeah

[Lizzie]: like you guys are talking about a murder mystery right?

[Gem]: yeah

[Grian]: MUMBO'S THE BOOGEYMAN I SWEAR GUYS

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

[Jimmy]: like in life??????

HOW DO YOU KNOW?????

[Mumbo]: I can't believe I'm doing this...

guys I'm not the boogeyman

[Gem]: MUMBO??????????

GUYS??????

AM I HALLUCINATING

[Grian]: HAHHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHA

THE FUNNIEST PART AOBUT THIS IS THAT MUMBO ACTUALLY JEEPS HIS PHONE ON HIM DURING PE

MUMBO I DIDN"T THINK YOU'D HAVE IT IN YOU

[Mumbo]: Grian!

Guys how do I convey out Grian's cackling in text

[Gem]: I can't even process this

[Lizzie]: I'm supposed to be writing about how the chemical reaction went but

Hi mumbo

I usually never see you here!

[Mumbo]: not my fault this group chat is so chaotic

[Jimmy]: mumbo you can be chaotic sometimes

also I'd say HUEHUEHEUHEUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHEE for Grian's laugh

[Gem]: guys I'm hallucinating aren't I

[Lizzie]: Hmmm

Isn't it more like a HAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHHAAAAAAAAAAHAHAAAHAAA

[Jimmy]: yeah but like

you need to convey the grianess

wait

back on topic

Mumbo are you sure you're not the boogeyman

[Mumbo]: I swear!

But I'm the Boogey Man!

[Grian]: no literally

this man can dance

also guys can we not debate about what my laugh sounds like

[Martyn]: you guys are all wrong

Grian's laugh sounds like this

huehuEhEEHUAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAhAHaHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAHUEHUEHUEHEUHEUHEEEEHEAHAHHEHHEAHHEEEEHHAAAAAAAAAHUERHUHAUHUAHUHAURHHEHHEUHEUHE

[Jimmy]: we should add in when Grian's laughing so hard he can't breath anymore

[Martyn]: oh yeah

so like

huehuEhEEHUAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAhAHaHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeweeeeeeeeeeeeeeedzzzeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-hueeehueehuauaaueueeheEHUEHUEHUEHEUHEUHEEEEHEAHAHHEHHEAHHEEEEHHAAAAAAAAAHUERHUHAUHUAHUHAURHHEHHEUHEUHE

[Jimmy]: yeah

[Grian]: no

[Martyn]: yes

[Grian]: no

[Martyn]: yes

[Grian]: no.

[Martyn]: huehuEhEEHUAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAhAHaHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeweeeeeeeeeeeeeeedzzzeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-hueeehueehuauaaueueeheEHUEHUEHUEHEUHEUHEEEEHEAHAHHEHHEAHHEEEEHHAAAAAAAAAHUERHUHAUHUAHUHAURHHEHHEUHEUHE

[Grian]: NO.

[Mumbo]: sorry mate I'm going to have to agree with martyn on this one

[Gem]: ok guys thanks for confirming this is a hallucination

absolutely bizarre thing my brain has come up with

[Martyn]: huehuEhEEHUAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAhAHaHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeweeeeeeeeeeeeeeedzzzeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-hueeehueehuauaaueueeheEHUEHUEHUEHEUHEUHEEEEHEAHAHHEHHEAHHEEEEHHAAAAAAAAAHUERHUHAUHUAHUHAURHHEHHEUHEUHE

[Jimmy]: can we go back to talking about how Grian doesn't need to study for anything?