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Chapter Text

This was not the first time in his life that Harry believed himself to be losing his mind and, like all the previous times the feeling of madness had flooded him, he hoped that there was a rational explanation for it.

His most recent flight of lunacy was caused by a young woman he was sure was stalking him.

“Harry are you sure you saw someone out here.” Hermione asked with the tact of a hippopotamus on a rampage.

“Hermione I’m telling you I saw her. She had black hair and her skin was so pale I’m telling you she’s real.” Harry shouted back as he looked from one tree trunk to another as though she was simply playing hide and seek.

“Mate this is getting concerning!” Ron shouted back at him from the clearing where they had taken Teddy, Rose and Hugo out for picnic.

“I’m well aware!” Harry shouted back before taking one final sweep of the forest. He sighed to himself as he turned around to make his way back to the picnic.

It had been weeks of this.

It didn’t matter where he was or what he was doing he would see her over and over again.

Some days he would see her through the shop windows at Diagon Ally. Other times he would see her face in a crowd of people. It didn’t matter if they were in the wizarding world or the muggle. She was always there smiling back at him.

Her long black hair cascading behind her, her pale skin taking on almost a blue tint and her lips a whisper of a smile. She would always smile at him and no matter who was with him it was like he and only he could see her.

He could feel her calling out to him. Like the magic drumming under his skin would sing whenever she was near. He could feel it, the breeze would carry her song, the leaves would shiver and shake and then there she was.

He knew he was looking at her and she at him but the moment he looked away she would be gone. Without a single trace and he would be left to wonder if she was real or nothing but a figment of his imagination.

Everyone thought he was losing his mind whenever he would bring it up. Time and time again Ron would tell him he hadn’t seen anyone or Hermione would promise him no one had been there. Everyone was starting to become more and more concerned whenever the topic would come up.

Harry knew he wasn’t making it easier for himself, it had been 9 years since the war and while every one else had been anxious to continue on with their lives he had decided to finally give himself a moment to catch his breath.

For years he had enjoyed his seclusion, his new home was an estate in Scotland, away from the prying eyes of the press and the wizarding world and his life centred around his friends and godchildren and nothing more.

It was a good life and one he had grown to love even when his self imposed loneliness weighed on his soul. But recently he felt purposeless, restless like there was more for him to do and see and learn and yet no matter what he turned his attention to it all just felt wrong.

His return to London had caused more nausea than excitement. His consulting work with the Aurors department felt less like coming home and more like the wrongness of feeling another’s skin on your body under a pollyjuice potion.

Even his home in Grimmauld Place felt wrong, he had renovated it and redecorated it well over a dozen times and much to Kreecher’s dismay it was never enough.

Everything just didn’t fit quite right and he could not understand why.

So naturally he was obsessing about this mirage rather than trying to make sense of his own problems and ill fitting life.

He shook his head softly to himself as he saw Hermione return to the clearing and pull Hugo into her arms while Ron ran away from them, no doubt running after Rose and Teddy before they got themselves into some mischief.

And then he felt it again, the slight upturn of the breeze, the whisper of magic on his skin, the dancing of the trees. She was here.

All of a sudden his body was moving without his thoughts pushing him to do so. He didn’t know where he was going or why. He could vaguely hear his friends shouting for him but their voices faded away into the distance. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was that she was there. That she was waiting for him.

He couldn’t have run far, it felt like only a moment and yet he had no idea where he was. He couldn’t hear the kids and their rambunctious laughter or Ron and Hermione’s shouts.

He was in the woods and yet the forest around him felt different.

“It’s magic of course.” A quiet voice said behind him.

His neck snapped in her direction, his body moving toward her like a fish on a line.

“Who are you?” He asked before he could think to even look at her. If he had it would have been obvious.

“I think you know the answer to that my lord.” He voice was a hypnotic lull, like an ancient lullaby. Her eyes were blacker than night and yet they shined like stars in distance galaxies. Her hair was long enough to reach the ground and her skin, it was the palest blue he had ever seen. Then there was her smile, it was breath taking.

“Death” he whispered her name and was rewarded with her smile.

“I am surprised it was not you that sought me out first.” She said with a chuckle as she walked past him and took a seat on a long fallen tree. Her robes billowing around her in a glimmer of invisibility just like his own.

“Can you blame me? You’ve taken so much from me already.” The resentment bled into his voice whether he willed it or not. It was the singular truth on which his entire life revolved. Loss and grief were his oldest companions.

“I’m sorry.” His head snapped at attention as the sincerity in her voice caught him off guard. “I know just how much I took from you and I took no pleasure in it.” She didn’t

meet his eyes, couldn’t have even if she had wanted to. It wasn’t guilt that marred her features but rather concession.

“Your hands were tied I suppose.” He placated, hoping to forgive her even where it wasn’t warranted.

She offered him a ghost of a smile in response.

“I am a necessity. There is little that can be done, I am a constant in this world and so I move as fate commands me.” She was well versed, her words rolled off her tongue with an ease of comfort that was beyond Harry’s understanding.

“Is that why you’re here? Is… is it my time?” Harry asked cautiously, his instincts telling him to run despite the comicality of the notion.

Death smiled before she shook her head. “Not yet. No that is not why I am here.”

The confusions on Harry’s face was enough to make Death laugh, her laugher was like the melodic sound of wind chimes.

“If you wanted to have a chat over a cup of tea you could have just asked.” Harry teased to which he was rewarded with another laugh.

“I will be sure to take you up on that offer one day my lord.” She added with a smile. Harry smiled back, happy to ease her worry if even for a moment. It seemed almost painfully obvious how alone she must be.

“You keep calling me your lord. I don’t think I’m a noble but then again I don’t know much about my family.” Harry asked as he took a seat next to her. His eyes taking in his surrounding, she was right he could practically feel the magic in the air.

“You are the master of death. I didn’t think you could forget that so easily.” She said softly, her curiosity evident as she looked up at him.

Harry’s face turned quickly back at her as the shock coursed through him. That old story couldn’t have actually meant anything.

“I thought that was just part of the old children’s story. I didn’t think it…meant anything?” He asked cautiously.  She smiled back at him and nodded before looking up above at the sky.

“It does and it doesn’t. The old stories they’re not all right or all wrong but they are still true. The deathly hollows. They were made by my hand and to wield them all is to wield my magic.” Death explained.

“But… but I don’t. Not any more. The stone is lost and the wand… about the wand-“ Harry began almost as though he was about to ramble into an apology for breaking such a important relic but she stopped him before he could begin.

“You broke it.”

“Yeah. Sorry about that.” He added sheepishly as he rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. Death laughed gently at Harry’s discomfort.

“I do not blame you. It was the right decision to make but you see my power was in each of those items and to use them meant drawing on my power. When you broke the wand my power had to go somewhere.” She explained gently as she watched Harry’s eyes widen comically in shock.

“Oh Merlin’s beard please tell me I didn’t unleashed it on the world! Shit shit shit shit shit!” Harry panicked. Death quickly rested her hand on his shoulder and began to try and calm the man in front of him.

“No no not quite. Harry you absorbed my magic. You aren’t just a normal wizard anymore the magic, my magic is now a part of your very being.” Death explained but only panic was coursing through the boy who lived.

“Does this mean I’m going to die? Wait does this mean I can’t ever die? I don’t want to live forever! I mean no offence I’m just saying- shit I don’t know what I’m saying what am I going to do!?” The panic was setting in but Death with the tact of an immortal being grabbed him by the arms and shook him until he finally calmed down.

“My lord you have had my magic running through your veins for years and nothing has happen. You are fine.” She calmed him before he could continue to spiral.

“But you’re here. There must be a reason. A problem?” He asked cautiously. For a moment she seemed to look abashed, almost embarrassed. The emotion didn’t suit her face in the slightest.

“That’s … that’s not the reason I’m here.” She added.

“Me having deaths magic coursing through my veins isn’t the reason you’re here? What could be more important than telling me that!?” Harry exclaimed

“I had actually planned on telling you about the magic for some time now but… well you see time can be a little tricky.” If she didn’t look so embarrassed and sincere Harry would have been far more upset than he was. But something about seeing her so nervous felt wrong.

She was death after all. She was powerful and ethereal and some part of him just knew that something was wrong here.

“I don’t mean to be curt but then why are you here?” He asked as he sat back down on the log. She sighed and took a seat next to him.

“I… I have a request. A favour actually and you’re the only one who I can ask… who can help me.”

Harrys eyes widened at the prospect of him being of any use to Death herself but there was something about her. She seemed resigned. Defeated.

“I’ll help.” He found himself saying before the concept had even cemented in his mind. If she needed his help then so be it. That’s exactly what he would do. Now he just needed to figure out how.

“My lord this isn’t a small-“

“It doesn’t matter to me. Big or small I’ll help you.” His conviction was startling even for Death. Death had known all of mankind, the best and the worst of them and yet no one had ever offered to help her. Not once. Not before today.

“Thank you” She said as she smiled back at him brightly.

“So what do you need me to do? Does it involve snakes? I can still talk to them and they make for wonderful company.” Harry asked just to try and get her to laugh again. When it worked he smiled back at her.

“No no snakes. He’s a person. He needs help and… and there’s no way that I can help him.” She explained sadly.

“Oh. Who is he? Does he have a name? Is he a wizard? I’m sure the ministry keeps record of everyone.” He asked confused why Death would ask him to help one single person.

“No the ministry won’t know of him. I mean they do but not… not as he is.”

“I’m sorry you’re not making much sense. But my friend Hermiones great with riddles maybe she can help?” He added as he became more and more confused. Death laughed and shook her head.

“Allow me to explain. This person he has lived by many names and identities over the millennia-“

“He’s that old!?”

Death nodded solemnly.

“I think of him as the ancient one. He… I told you earlier that I am the hand of fate. I act as the fates demand and I cannot act until they allow. His time. It has not come yet.”

Harry was taken aback by the thought. Why would someone be forced to live for so long by the fates. It seemed cruel.

“Is he cursed?” Harry asked solemnly.

Death shook her head no and then sighed.

“It might as well be. Hes waiting for someone. He’s been waiting for the same person to return to him for over 1500 years.” She explained.

“1500 years!?!” Harry exclaimed in shock but Death just nodded gravely.

“My lord I… He calls to me. He has for centuries begging me to take him to the land of the dead. To return him to his loved ones. But I… I can not. My hands are tied and I am helpless but to watch his suffering and … he does not deserve this. He has isolated himself from the world. He refuses to live and I don’t know what else I can do.”

Harry had always hated to see people cry and seeing the pain on Deaths face was a stake through the heart. He wanted to help her. He would.

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to help him but I can sure as hell try. Where can I find him?” Death smiled softly back at him. The weight on her shoulders finally dropping.

“I’ve brought you a map and a compass. They will guide you to the hidden realm he has created. You will have to go alone only my magic will allow you to pass into Avalon. The rest is up to you.” She explained as she pulled a map and a compass and handed it to him. Then she reached around her neck and unlocked her necklace and medallion before placing same around Harry’s neck.

“And the necklace?” He asked.

“To call for me. Wrap your hand around it and call my name and I will appear.” She explained.

“And your name?” He asked gently.

She smiled back at his before speaking.

“I have many but I’ve always preferred Amaya.” She said with a smile. Harry nodded as he reached down and held the medallion in his hand. It was made of a silver casing and in its centre was an obsidian jackal.

“This necklace-“ Harry looked up only to realize he was alone once again.

Chapter Text

“So you’re friends with Death?” Ron asked as he stared at the medallion hanging off of Harry’s neck with a healthy scepticism. They had come back to Ron and Hermione’s home after their picnic and now that Teddy was home with Andromeda and all the kids were asleep they could finally discuss what had happen.

“Mate I don’t know what to tell you-“ Harry began before being quickly interrupted.

“More importantly we need to do a complete assessment of your magic Harry. You have Deaths magic coursing through you!” Hermiones voice was octaves higher then it should be and Harry and Ron exchanged a terrifying look between them.

“Darling maybe we should take a deep breath. Harry broke the wand years ago and he looks fine to me?” Ron appeased as he pointed to Harry and Harry smiled and tried to look as healthy as possible.

“I feel great!” Harry added only to be met with a glare.

“The fact that you’re ever standing in one piece is nothing short of a miracle Harry.” Hermione clapped back as she finally took a seat at her kitchen table.

“Hey I’m less reckless then I used to be!” Harry exclaimed.

“Yeah it’s not like he’d go off and chase after death in a forest for no reason oh wait-“ Ron piped in.

“Hey that was different none of you believed me and I knew she was real!” Harry argued.

“Yeah and now we know that she’s real and you have her magic somehow!! Did she mention anything about oh I don’t know what this could mean!?” Hermione shouted only to cover her mouth and look towards the stairs to their home hoping against all home she hadn’t woken her children.

They all froze for a moment and waited to see if there was any shouting or crying before they sighed in collective relief.

“No ‘Mione she didn’t. Honestly she didn’t seem too concerned about it and I think if anything was wrong she would have told me.” Harry pacified as best he could while hoping against all hope that he wouldn’t stress out his friends.

“But then why would she tell you now mate?” Ron asked curiously as he took in his friends posture. There was more to this that he had yet to tell them.

“She asked for my help with something.” Harry explained

“She doesn’t want you to kill someone does she? That’s barbaric-“Hermione began.

“No it was the opposite.” Harry interjected.

“She wanted you to have a baby!?” Ron exclaimed in shock only to be smacked upside the head by Harry. “Ow! That hurt you know!” He shouted and Harry shouted over him.

“No she wants me to save someone Ron!” Harry corrected before his friend could come up with more insane theories.

“Save someone? Who would Death want you to save? And why?” Ron asked as he moved to the other side of his kitchen to grab a snack.

“Harry what exactly did she say to you?” Hermione asked with concern as she took a seat at her kitchen table and gestured at Harry to do the same. Ron leaned back against his counter as he bit into his apple while still listening to the conversation.

“She asked me to find someone. She didn’t give me his name she just said he was the “ancient one” and that he wanted to die so he has been calling out to Death for a long time but she … well she said it’s not his time yet so she can’t take him. Guys she was just so upset and she asked me to find him and I just. I couldn’t say no. She said I was the only one who could help her and I just hated seeing her so sad.” Harry explained in a flurry.

Ron and Hermione shared a look between them as they watched their friend for a moment before Ron finally broke their silence.

“Malfoy’s right you do have a saviour complex-“ Hermione immediately smacked her husbands abdomen before turning to a sputtering and offended Harry.

“Forget about Draco, Harry this sounds dangerous, you know nothing about the person and he can’t be a normal person since most humans die. Maybe its a magical creature that you’re looking for and if this person is calling for Death-“

“Maybe he needs help! Maybe he’s alone and he needs a friend and he has no one to turn to? I can’t just do nothing!” He was adamant as he remembered himself as a child at the Dursleys. Alone and helpless and lost without a friend in the world. The fear the loneliness created sat heavy within him even after all these years.

Hermione had to force herself to not allow her eyes to water as she watched the distant look in Harry’s eyes.  Before she could say anything Ron’s hand was heavy on her shoulder squeezing it in comfort before he made his way to Harry’s side of the kitchen table.

“So how do we find him?” Ron asked gently as he sat down next to him only for Harry to smile brightly back at him.

He quickly pulled out the compass and map he had been given and placed them on the table for his friends to see.

“She said he’s isolated himself from the world and he’s hidden himself. She said that the map and the compass will lead me to Avalon.”

“Avalon?!” Ron exclaimed in surprise.

“Do you know about it? I knew it sounded familiar but I couldn’t put my finger on it-“

“Harry Avalon is the mythical island from the Legends of King Arthur and Merlin.” Hermione explained as Harry’s eyes widened in realization. Even he’d read the stories as a child and he was sure they were covered in his History of Magic class.

“It’s not mythical its lost. Dad always told us that it was a known place among wizards but its location was lost over time. People have looked-“ Ron interjected.

“Maybe he’s hidden himself there? What’s a better place to hide than a lost magical island? Death said he has lived for 1000 years so maybe he found it.” Harry theorized

“Maybe he knew its location before it was lost?” Ron wondered as Hermione nodded along.

“It’s possible there’s diaries and texts from as late as the Middle Ages that reference Merlin himself. All of wizard kind has looked up to him and Avalon is a direct link to him.” Hermione recalled from their history of magic lessons. She was always astounded by the stories of the knights of the round table as a child and finding out that they were true was a happy surprise.

“Yeah I knew about that but that’s not why the island is important it’s known for more than just the stories. Harry going to Avalon is dangerous they say the lake is a gateway to the Fae realm.” Ron added.

“Ron how do you know so much about this? I swear I’ve never heard of any of this.” Harry interjected only for Ron to shrug.

“Dad’s obsessed with the legends. He used to tell us the stories as kids. I think it’s cause he’s named after the old king. We were always asking him about it and he would tell us everything he knew.” Ron smiled as he thought back to those nights at the burrow before bed. The idea of doing the same with his own children warmed his heart.

Hermione and Harry shared a knowing smile before Hermione reached for the map and the compass and opened them up.

The map was a map of southern England she was sure of it but the landmarks and locations were nothing like she had seen before. It was far older than anything she’s seen and even the text was closer to medieval Anglo-Saxon than English. The compass on the other hand was clearly magical in nature and it only pointed to one image. An old castle tower.

“Ron in the legends there’s a tower in Avalon isn’t there?” Hermione asked

“That’s right that’s how you’d find your way through the mist and to the lake. By finding the tower and going towards it.”

“So then the compass points to the tower.” Harry concluded and Hermione nodded along.

“And this map must note the general location. There’s an area here that’s circled maybe that’s where you need to go!” Hermione exclaimed as she closely looked at the map. She just needed to compare it to a current one and they’d be in business before long.

“We can go this weekend I don’t think we’ve got anything going on.” Ron offered.

“I don’t think that’s possible. Death said I’d be the only one that could get to it. I think cause I have her magic I can get to it.” Harry added.

“Damn it! Okay fine but you have to promise to take me and dad there one day. There’s no way you’re finding Avalon and we get to miss it!” Ron demanded as Harry threw up his hands in defeat.

“Okay okay you’ve got yourself a deal.” Harry added with a laugh. All of a sudden there was a lightness in his chests he hadn’t realized he had lost. After all these years here he was again with his friends and a new mystery and he was genuinely excited for what might come next.

Chapter Text

Harry was completely lost. He had decided to try and find Avalon as soon as Hermione had been able to figure out the map and in true Harry Potter fashion he had jumped head first into solving the mystery without thinking it through.

Of course, he hadn’t told his friends this was what he was going to do. They were still under the impression that they would do this together over the weekend. But why wait when he had a free week and nothing at all to do on this particular Wednesday? So here he was somewhere near Somerset in an ancient forest covered in a thicker blanket of fog than he’d ever seen before.

He looked down at the compass gripped in his palm. Its lanyard was knotted tightly around his fist to ensure he didn’t lose it after one too many close calls earlier in the day. He continued walking in the direction it pointed, with nothing but his thoughts for company. This was a far more challenging feat than he had ever anticipated. If he took his eyes off the needle for more than a moment he’d end up walking in the wrong direction. So far he'd walked through a stream, multiple puddles of muck and more bushes and thorns than he could count. The only thing he had going for him was the fact that no animals magical or otherwise had managed to try and eat him, but knowing his luck that was bound to happen eventually.

‘Whoever he is he really doesn’t want to be found’ Harry thought to himself with a sigh as he continued to make his way to what he hoped was Avalon.

He had been walking since morning, and his watch reminded him that hours had passed him by in the thick of the fog. The only thing that kept him going was his thoughts. He didn't know who he was looking for or why but deep down he felt that he was doing the right thing, but he couldn’t help but wonder if he was being entirely selfish in taking on this quest. 

Ron’s comment about his saviour complex had hit him harder than the redhead probably intended, but Harry’s mind was a weapon and he couldn't help but turn it on himself every chance he got. He thought back to his conversation with Death, the exhaustion that seemed to weigh her down and the guilt that permeated their conversation. She seemed helpless and resigned in a way Harry recognized all too well. 

He thought about his own friends. The frustration Hermione exhibited every time she visited him in Scotland, begging and pleading with him to return home to London, to them. She and Ron were the only family he ever had. Their families were his family, and their home was his home, but as the years had gone on their lives had gone in different directions so naturally. Their wedding day was one of the happiest in Harry’s life. Watching the two people he loved the most in this life stand before him and the world and swear themselves to each other and the family they would soon create was astounding. He was their best man, and his speech after their ceremony had left him and almost everyone else in attendance in tears. 

The only thing that had given him more happiness then that moment was holding Rose and Hugo in his arms for the first time and watching Teddy grow up before his eyes. He loved them dearly, and he loved the place he had in their lives. 

But his love for them didn’t mean he was any less alone. That was why Hermione worried about him, why Ron watched him so much more closely these days, they knew him better than he knew himself and they knew he was lonely even when he refused to accept it or acknowledge it. He had assured them a hundred times over that he was only 26, he was relatively young, and he had the rest of his life to figure it out, but they were unconvinced. Probably for good reason, he tended to try and avoid his own problems rather than facing them head-on, and they knew that better than anyone.

He couldn’t really argue with them when he was literally on what seemed to be a giant wild goose chase. Maybe that was Death's plan, to let him die out here in the woods surrounded by nothing but fog, mud and thorns. He shook himself out of the thought and kept going as he told himself that maybe, just maybe helping someone else would be exactly what he needed to try and help himself too. If it was a little selfish then so be it he wasn’t actually a saint even if he could hear Draco’s condescending voice arguing against him. 

The moment he saw the watchtower it was like the air shifted and all of a sudden he wasn't sure he could even breathe. He ran towards it without once looking back. 

He gasped as he walked out of the forest, and all of a sudden the mist had lifted, and the sun was shining once more. He could feel the magic around him almost vibrating against his skin in a way he’d never felt before, and it was both overwhelming and beautiful. He hadn’t felt this way since that first day in Daigon Ally with Hagrid, but that’s how he felt now. Excited for the first time in years and he couldn't stop himself from looking in every direction.

The lake was a stunning shade of blue and green and it glittered with a light that seemed to come from within its very depths. Surrounding it was a field of grass that swayed to the breeze almost as if the grass were dancing up the hills that led up to the famous tower.

Harry stared at it all in awe as he felt the magic within him practically sing in a way he had never experienced before. He felt a sense of belonging that was beyond his ability to comprehend, like he belonged here and like he had always belonged here because the magic that sang in his soul lived permanently here. This place was magic itself.

“It’s been a long time since someone made it this far.” The voice startled Harry and like any good Auror he drew his wand first and thought later as he spun around to face the owner of the voice only to be surprised once more.

In front of him stood a young man who couldn’t possibly be much older than himself. His blue eyes were shockingly bright, and his black hair was shaggy but combed back. He was surprisingly handsome and was dressed in a white  dress shirt and trousers with the first few buttons open like he was an office worker trying to take it easy after a long day's work. Most surprising was that he was smiling back at him like he was greeting an old friend and not like an ancient magical and/or immortal entity.

“Now now there’s no need to attack I promise that I mean you no harm. Unless of course, you’re here for improper reasons.” He joked lightly as he gestured for Harry to put down his wand. 

Harry blushed as he sputtered an apology and returned his wand to its holster as quickly as he could under the watchful eyes of the young man. 

He took a deep breath to calm himself before he turned back to the man and met his eyes once again. This time he raised his hand in front of him to shake his hand. 

“I’m Harry Potter. It’s nice to meet you.” He introduced himself confidently and watched as the other man's eyes widened slightly before he laughed gently and met his hand with his own and shook it. 

“It’s very nice to meet you Harry.” He replied with no introduction of his own. Harry waited a moment, their hands still shaking, until he finally couldn’t wait any longer.

“This is the part where you introduce yourself.” Harry prompted only for the man’s face to contort with confusion and surprise. 

“You don't know who I am?” He asked, their hands still shaking before the men finally caught themselves and let one another go with another laugh. 

“Sorry about that, and no I don't know who you are, but it doesn’t seem like you know me either.” Harry added a little unsure of how to proceed. He was used to being recognized in their world, but he would take anonymity wherever he could have it. 

The young man looked even more surprised by that but Harry felt like he was somehow missing the memo. Should he have known this man? He didn’t seem familiar, maybe they had met before. But that couldn’t be right if he had then the man would definitely know his name and even though Harry didn’t have the best memory he was sure he’d remember someone this handsome. 

“If you don't know who I am then why are you here?” He asked Harry cautiously as he took in the young wizard in front of him? assessing him the way Harry often assessed a dark wizard during one of his investigations. 

“Well this is Avalon, aren’t there lots of reasons to go looking for it? People have apparently been searching for it for a really really long time.” Harry explained 

“Well I know that I’m the one that’s keeping it hidden.” He sassed Harry back. 

“You’re doing what? How would you even- No that’s not important you must know this place well and if you’re here maybe you can help me. I’m looking for someone.” Harry asked hoping the young man could direct him to the man he was searching for. His mind failed to make the obvious connection as he assumed that this was not the man Death spoke of. He couldn’t be. He seemed far too young and chipper to be of concern to Death herself. 

“Oh um well I don’t really- I’m not all that well connected these days but I suppose I can try. Who exactly are you looking for?” He asked helpfully as he thought about potential searching spells that he could employ to help the young man out. 

 “Well I don’t actually know who I’m- I don't really have his name-”

“You’re looking for someone and you don't even know his name?” He asked skeptically.

“She wouldn’t tell me! I asked I swear I did but she said he had lots of names and what the hell am I supposed to do with that!?” Harry complained as he pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose and shut his eyes to try and settle the headache he hadn’t realized he was sporting. 

The young man's eyes widened in shock as he looked at Harry as he put two and two together. This wizard had been sent to look for him. 

“Who exactly sent you?” He asked cautiously, afraid almost immediately that this was another ploy to try and harness him and his magic for evil once again. 

Harry looked back up at the man in surprise, his teeth immediately biting at his lips nervously as he thought about how to explain this. The young man in front of him mistook the worry for the worst of his assumptions and prepared to attack when Harry’s response took him immediately by surprise. 

“Well, you see… How do I even begin to explain this? Okay well, you know what I might as well just say it and if you think I’m blimey then I don’t care. It was Death. She was the one who sent me.” Harry said it with the confidence of a hippogriff on a rampage unwavering and assured in himself in a way that pushed the sorcerer's world off kilter in a heartbeat. 

“Death sent you?” He asked shocked, his feet taking a step back without his brain's instructions. One second he was falling backwards and the next Harry was there to grab him by the arm and pull him up. 

“Whoa there hey hey it’s nothing to be scared of she’s honestly not as scary as people think I swear!”  Harry tried his best to pacify as he helped him stand on his feet and met his eyes worriedly hoping he hadn’t scared the man more than intended. 

The sorcerer’s eyes widened as he finally took Harry in for the first time since he had appeared. He was an idiot not to see it sooner. Of course the man wasn’t a normal wizard, he was powerful in a way that was so rare these days. He had the magic of the old religion coursing through his veins and he hadn’t even realized it. How could he have possibly missed it? 

“Did she tell you why she was sending you here? It’s not like her to trifle in the actions of mankind.” He asked, his voice distant as he considered all his past interactions with her. 

Harry’s head tilted curiously as he looked back at the man, even more confused than he was previously. Was this really the man Death had sent him to find? 

“She said she needed my help. That there was an “ancient one” who needed to be helped and she needed me to help her.” Harry explained cautiously as he watched the man's eyes widen with understanding. “So are you the one I’m looking for? You don’t exactly look ancient.” 

The man's blue eyes glared back at him as he let his magic run free and transform him into a much older version of himself. He watched with pleasure as Harry jumped back in shock at the unexpected use of magic.

“Is this better?” He asked with a sickening sweetness and attitude he enjoyed using most whenever he took this form.  

“Morgana’s tits that's creepy! Cut it out!” He shouted back his hand clutching his chest like it was about to jump out of his ribcage. The wizard made a disgusted face at the outburst before letting his magic turn him back into his younger body with ease. 

“Hey, you were asking for it.” He joked back as he crossed his arms and stared back at the lake, his mind lost in thought. 

Harry watched him for a moment as he took in the not-so-young man and wondered not for the first time who he was, what he was doing here, and what was his story. 

“Listen, I know I don’t know you and you don’t know me but there's no harm in getting to know one another is there? Why don’t we try this again? Hi, I’m Harry James Potter, it’s very nice to meet you.” He introduced himself again as he once again raised his hand and waited to see if the other man would take it. 

The sorcerer regarded the man in front of him for a moment and then another, not once did the hand in the air waiver or fall. He sighed as he let their eyes meet once again. Blue eyes met green and for the first time in a very very long time, he decided to let his guard down and he took Harry’s hand in his own and shook it. 

“I’m Merlin Emrys. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Harry.”

A pregnant silence fell over the men as Harry froze, the words playing themselves in his mind on repeat but not processing. Seconds passed and Merlin wondered once again if the young wizard planned to keep his hand captive. 

“As much as I’m enjoying shaking your hand, I wouldn’t mind having my hand back.” Merlin joked only for Harry to nod and continue shaking his hand. “You know you have to let go of it to give it back.” He added cheekily only for Harry to finally get the memo and let go of him. 

“Shit I’m sorry! Oh no, I shouldn’t swear, should I? Is that bad? No wait no that, fuck! Oh, Merlin's balls! NO, I MEAN NOT THAT!” He practically shouted as Merlin started to laugh uncontrollably. “Wait no I’m sorry fuck I’m not good at this! Don’t laugh harder it's not funny you’re Merlin! Oh shit, this is Avalon of course you’re Merlin! How did I not realize? Hermione’s going to kill me! I knew I shouldn’t have slept through History of Magic shit shit SHIT!” Harry continued to spiral as Merlin felt his eyes water from laughing so hard. 

Merlin had to force himself to subdue his laughter for Harry’s benefit as the boy continued to look around in horror. Merlin quickly reached out and placed a hand on the man's shoulder to try and ground him as he finally got ahold of himself long enough to speak. 

“Sorry sorry, it’s been so long since I’ve laughed like that I owe you my thanks, Mr. Potter.” Merlin finally said as he watched Harry breathe normally again.

“Harry” He replied

“Sorry?” Merlin asked surprised as he watched the once panicking man regain his footing and address him directly once again.

“Call me Harry, my friends call me Harry, Mr. Potter’s reserved for strangers and my professors when they’re angry at me.” He explained as his mind conjured images of an angry Minerva McGonagall, she would be horrified if she ever found out about this introduction.

Merlin’s face was painted with shock as he stared at the man in front of him. It had been hundreds of years since he’d let his true identity be known by anyone and even longer since someone had responded with anything less than shock, reverence or greed. 

“And would you consider me as such? As a friend?” He asked sceptically only to be met with a bright smile and an earnest laugh. 

“Well of course. Why else would I be here?” He asked curiously, after all, what else could he possibly offer other than himself? Merlin gasped at the honesty of it all. This man, this wizard was standing here, in Avalon, in the very heart of the old religion,  in front of Merlin himself and the first thing he did wasn’t to ask for knowledge, or power, or wealth. The first thing he did was offer himself. His friendship. 

“You know I’ve lived a very long life young man but this? This is a first.” Merlin voiced his surprise as he looked skeptically back at the boy. 

“Well, what can I say I like to keep people on their toes.” Harry explained with a laugh “And as much as I’m enjoying this would it be too much trouble to bother you for a cup of tea? I was in those woods for ages and I’m beat.” Harry thought to add as he realized his headache was probably linked to his missed afternoon tea. 

Merlin looked at the green-eyed wizard like he'd grown a second head before he couldn’t help but to laugh once again. This was mental. 

“Yeah let’s go to the tower and get you that cup of tea.” He finally relented before leading Harry further into Avalon. 

Chapter Text

Harry knew better than to go snooping around an old castle unaccompanied but he couldn’t seem to help himself today. Not when he was in the heart of Avalon and Merlin himself was in the kitchen making him a cup of tea. So screw being polite he thought to himself as he investigated the suite of armour that sat in the corner of the sitting room Merlin had left him in. He perused the books on the shelves that lined the walls and the items on top of the fireplace. He forced himself to keep his hands behind his back to avoid touching something that ought not to be touched. He had learned at least that one lesson at Hogwarts.

He was staring up at the painting that hung above the fireplace when Merlin finally returned with a pot of tea and snacks in tow. The painting was of a castle and city surrounded by woods. The flags that rose from the castle were bright red with the symbol of a white dragon in the centre. 

“It’s Camalot.” Merlin noted as his magic set the tea down at a small table flanked on either side by large green wingbacked chairs. Merlin took his seat at one and motioned for Harry to take a seat at the other. 

“Umm no it’s best that I not, I’m covered in mud.” Harry protested only to watch Merlin’s eyes shine gold and a wind appeared to blow the mess right off of him. His eyes widened as he looked down at his now spotless attire in wonder. “You’re going to have to teach me that one!” 

Merlin smiled as he nodded in agreement. “I’d be happy to, do you tend to get yourself into messes often?” he joked to which Harry laughed as he took his seat. 

“Like you could not imagine. I reckon I’m a magnet for chaos but then again most of the time I’m the one who goes looking for it.” Harry admitted with a good-natured laugh at himself and Merlin couldn’t help but to laugh along with him. 

“I think I have a pretty good idea I’ve been known to be a little reckless myself.” Merlin admitted without taking a moment to think it through. It felt so natural to open up to this man that it was jarring. “So tell me Harry now that you know who I am where do we go from here?”  He asked as he busied himself by pouring them each a cup of tea.

Harry stopped for a moment and let himself ponder the thought. He had come here unsure of what to expect but this was far beyond anything he had considered. Then again Merlin’s identity didn’t really change anything, did it? He thought back to Death and the reason she asked him to help, this all-powerful sorcerer with his kind eyes and cheeky grin had lost his will to live. Harry’s heart clenched as the gravity of the situation sank in. They were here in a sitting room filled with the relics of a life long gone by and here was Merlin, lost in time to his past with no one left to pull him out of it.  

“You come with me.” Harry replied instinctively as Merlin’s head shot up in surprise at the words. 

“Are you-”

“Mad? Yeah, I must be.” Harry interjected before Merlin had a chance to argue. “Death told me you refused to live and if I’m going to help with that then step one is to get you the hell out of here.” 

Merlin couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “First of all she doesn’t get an opinion when she’s the whole reason I’m in this mess in the first place! And second I’m just fine!” Merlin argued in a huff. 

“And now you sound ancient-”

“Hey! Don't you know how to mind your manners!?” Merlin interjected. 

“Oh my god you are not making the point you think you are.” Harry added salt to the wound. 

“And what point do you think I’m making? Merlin asked curiously as he reached for his cup and took a sip. Harry shook his head before also taking a sip of his own drink before answering. 

“Listen I’m not here to try and offend you or to try and understand what you’re going through. I can’t know what you must be going through. I don’t know you, at least not yet.” Harry pacified as diplomatically as he could.

“Then why exactly are you here?” Merlin asked pointedly. 

“You’ve asked me an honest question so I’m going to assume you want an honest answer?” Harry asked. 

“I don’t take kindly to being lied to.” Merlin confirmed. 

“Great cause I’ve never been one to hide my cards. The truth is that I don’t really have a good reason for being here. I’m not here cause of a prophecy or because it’s fated, I’m just here because this is where I wanted to be.” Harry tried to explain but as per usual his vocabulary fell short and he sounded much clunkier than he intended. 

“You want to be here? With me? In Avalon?” Merlin’s brows knitted together in confusion as he wondered not for the first time if this wizard was in his right mind. 

“No that’s not what I- Listen Death told me you were here alone and I … I just hated the idea of someone, anyone being alone like that. I … I know what that’s like…” The statement sat between them both as they both drank their tea lost in thought. 

“So you’re here to save me? From myself?” Merlin asked softly, his eyes were trained on the lake on the other side of the castle windows and Harry’s eyes widened as he watched him closely. He knew hope when he saw it on a person’s face. 

“Would you let me?” Harry asked cautiously as he watched Merlin mull over the hanging proposition before he turned back to the wizard in front of him.

“If I said no? Then what?” Merlin asked as he considered the other man, testing his resolve. 

Harry thought about it for a moment before he laughed softly to himself and met Merlin’s eyes with a resolve Merin hadn’t seen in another person in longer than he could remember.

“Well, I know where you live and I’ve been told I’m downright relentless when I put my mind to something. Truth be told I don't think you’d stand a chance. I’d convince you. Eventually.” Harry said with a smirk. 

Merlin’s eyes widened in surprise as he took in the other man's resolve. He couldn’t have actually meant that. There was no way that this man would put himself through all this trouble. And for what? To save Merlin from his own loneliness? It was impossible. 

“Why? You must have better things to do with your time?!” Merlin objected.

“And that my friend is where you are dead wrong! I have absolutely nothing else to do I can be here all day, all week, all month, all year even if that’s what it takes.” Harry challenged practically begging Merlin to question him, to give him a reason to show off just how stubborn and relentless he could be. 

Merlin couldn’t believe his senses and a part of him wondered if this could even be real. It couldn’t could it? No this must be a trick it had to be too good to be true. 

“Don't you have a job? A family? Friends? Anything else with which to occupy your time?” Merlin proved skeptically as he eyed the man sat next to him. 

“Nope. I mean I have friends but I’m an orphan, I’m single, and I’m an Auror but I only work when they really need me and they try not to need me so I’m all yours.” Harry articulated his point by placing his empty cup down on the table, falling back into his chair and getting comfortable. 

Merlin was incredulous, he was a man of many words but here he was shocked into actual silence. There was no way this was happening. 

“And then what? You’re going to give me a reason to keep going? To live again? To open my heart again? Are you mental?” Merlin questioned. 

“Yeah probably. But for what it’s worth I’ve seen crazier things happen so why not this? Maybe you’ll even thank me?” Harry posited primarily because he enjoyed the look of utter disdain that painted Merlin’s features when he did.

“HA No absolutely not. Listen I am tired of loving people only to watch them die-”

“So you just gave up and decided that you’d rather be alone than let yourself suffer the pain of grief again? You built your walls as high up as they would go and then you told yourself that you’d find solace within yourself not realizing that in building your walls you’d walled yourself in. And now you’re too afraid of the pain to let the walls down again so you’re avoiding the problem by hiding out here. Sound about right?” Harry hypothesized. 

“Just how much did Death tell you?” Merlin began to complain. 

“Not nearly that much, I just know the feeling a little too well. Truth be told I couldn’t understand at first why the hell Death asked me for help with all of this but now I think I understand why she sent me.”

“Well please feel free to enlighten me because I too would love to know the answer to that,” Merlin complained loudly but Harry just smiled back at him, his grin as menacing as that of a lion. 

“Because she finally found your match. So you tell me Merlin how would you like to do this? The easy way or the hard way?” Harry asked with a grin that made Merlin more than a little uncomfortable. 

“What’s the easy way?” Merlin asked.

“You move to London with me.”

“What?! Have you lost you-”

“You know the answer to that is yes, but come on think about it! It’s perfect!” Harry practically begged. 

“How is this perfect!?” Merlin felt himself close to hysterics this was not how he thought his day would be going. 

“I have a beautiful home in Grimmuald place with no one but me and Kreecher to fill it. You could move in with me! We could get you back amongst the people amongst the world? It would be great!” Harry offered as if he had just had the most brilliant idea anyone could have ever come up with. Merlin on the other hand was trying not to have a panic attack at the mere thought. 

“Why in all hell would I do that? I came here to avoid people until I was needed.” Merlin argued. 

“How could anyone need you when you’ve taken yourself off the chessboard? Come on I made it all the way here didn’t I, what more reason do you want? Do you need some sign from the heavens of something?” Harry asked.

“No thanks I think Fate has wronged me enough.” Merlin complained with what was clearly a pout. 

“Great me too! So screw fate and let’s take control of our own lives? What’s the worst that could happen?” Harry tempted the universe much to the shock and horror of the sorcerer.

Merlin sat in surprise for a moment and then another and then, from seemingly nowhere he began to laugh. Its was completely insane and yet he desperately wanted to give in. 

“Are you okay there mate?” Harry asked as Merlin continued to laugh even harder until he finally calmed himself once more. 

“You know what Harry? You’ve got yourself a deal. I’m in.” Merlin agreed as he finally let himself hope once again. If he was going to be an idiot he might as well be a brave one and plunge in head first. 

Chapter Text

“Welcome to Grimmauld Place!” Harry gestured dramatically the second that he led Merlin through its front doors. 

Merlin’s eyes widened as he took in the home with its chestnut woods and light walls. There was no denying that it was a lovely home. 

“It’s very beautiful.” He commented as Harry smiled happily back at him. It had taken him ages to undo the enchantments that held the ugly portraits in place and even longer to refurbish and brighten the home. Harry smiled as he thought about Sirius and how proud he would have been to see the overhaul. He’s thought about placing his and Remus’ portrait in the home a million times over but he doesn’t have the heart to do it. The wounds are still far too deep. 

“Thankyou but please if there’s something you don’t like we can change it.” He offered only to hear Kreacher throw a bucket off the stairs. Both men startled as they looked to the stairs. 

“Master Potter has nothing to do but cause more chaos to this ancient house of black-“ He grumbled before his eyes landed on Merlin and his face transformed into shock and horror. 

“Blessed be this can’t be? Emrys?” He asked recognizing him almost immediately. 

Harry had never seen Kreacher so happy as he apparated in front of the sorcerer to hurriedly shake his hand. Merlin’s surprise morphed in to a dazzling smile as he knelt down to shake the elf’s hand enthusiastically. 

“Hello! It’s very nice to meet you!” 

Harry grinned down at them both as he watched the genuine joy on Kreechers face. Over the years Kreecher had gradually warmed up to him and Harry had come to appreciate his honesty and candour. He liked to think that Kreecher had warmed up to him too given that he got far fewer insults about his muggle heritage than he once used to. He’d tried to free Kreecher more times then he could count but the old elf refused to leave Grimmauld place and him no matter the circumstance. 

“Kreecher I’ve invited Merlin to live here with us. What do you think of that idea?”

“M-m-master Emrys will reside in this honourable and ancient home? I-I-I will serve master Emrys?” Kreecher asked his voice shaking with excitement as Harry nodded. 

“I look forward to getting to know you better Mr. Kreecher.” Merlin said as gently as he could but Kreecher looked to be seconds away from fainting with excitement. 

“I-I-I shall prepare a room immediately!” He exclaimed before apparating away. 

Both Harry and Merlin stared at the place he once occupied still in shock. 

“I don’t think he’ll ever let you leave now. How did he know who you are I thought no one would recognize you?” Harry joked making Merlin laugh. 

“I am a creature of magic. It’s not rare for others to recognize me for what I am.” Merlin explained. 

“So how do you keep it from people? Your real identity I mean.” Harry wondered aloud. 

“It was a deal that was struck. 1000 years ago I swore to allow magical creatures to carry on without my intervention in their daily dealings and in return they keep my secret from both the wizards and the humans.” Merlin explained much to Harry’s amazement. 

“That’s brilliant. The ministry can barely get a response from most magical creatures and during the war many tried to win the favour of the giants but-“ 

“They’re not exactly receptive to wizards because they do not see themselves as one and the same. They consider me one of their own.” He explained. 

“Are you? I mean I know you’re Merlin and all but you don’t look much different than myself.” Harry asked as he took in Merlin’s appearance. He didn’t look any different than a normal wizard. 

“My kind are long gone from this world. I was the last of us. The dragon lords.” Merlin admitted somewhat sadly. 

“Dragon lord? That’s wicked, you’ll have to show me more of your dragon lord abilities one of these days.” Harry chuckled. 

“You know I must say that I’m really enjoying your company today Harry.” Merlin commented as Harry led him to the new sitting room and his large couch. 

“I’ll be sure to remind you of that the next time you’re annoyed with me.” Harry joked as he took a seat next to Merlin. “Listen I know we’re going a little fast but I … I want us to be friends. Real friends. So I’m an open book ask me whatever you want and I promise I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.” 

Merlin smiled as he took Harry in. Their trip from Avalon to Grimmuald Place had been nothing short of eye opening. In the time he’d been gone the world had changed in a way he could have never expected. From infrastructure to technology things had changed so rapidly it was startling. 

During his long life he had made a practice to keep one foot in the human world and another in the wizarding world so that when Arthur returned he would be ready to guide him. It had been 200 years since he left the civilized world and now that he had returned he realized just how much he had missed. 

He truly felt out of place but the moment he was overwhelmed and in awe there was Harry. He would explain everything, tell him what he was looking at, where he was going what they were doing. He didn’t once seem put out by Merlins curiosity and seemed to feed off it. As the day went on Merlin began to wonder if he truly meant what he said. Did this wizard really just want to help him out of the goodness of his heart? It seemed implausible but a voice in the back of his mind begged him to have faith. 

“I don’t think I have ever met a person who has known me as I am and has ever just wanted my friendship. Do you truly want nothing from me?” Merlin asked now that he had the opportunity. 

To Harry’s credit he didn’t seem shocked or surprised by the question. Instead he looked pensive, his eyes distant as he thought long and hard about his answer. Merlin tried to quell the beating of his heart as his anxiety told him he was a trusting idiot that shouldn’t have gotten his hopes up. 

“To be honest I don’t think I really need anything. I’ve got all I could ever really want and I… I’ve seen the monsters that greed creates and I think I’m alright.” Harry admitted with a tension that felt foreign on the face of the kind man he had seen today. 

“I don’t mean to offend it’s just hard to trust others-“

“Yeah, I got that. It’s hard to accept when peoples motivations more often then not are to use you for their own self interest.” Harry finished once again catching Merlin off guard. 

“You seem to speak from experience.” He commented as he took in Harry’s clenched jaw. The green eyes man was no longer meeting his eyes, instead the were trained on the fireplace and its gently dancing flames. He was there next to him but his mind was clearly lost. “Harry?” 

Harry flinched out of his thoughts as he turned to Merlin and smiled reassuringly. 

“I’m sorry. You’re right though. I…I was famous in the wizarding world before I could even walk. I was raised by muggles so when I came to Hogwarts… it caught me off guard. All of a sudden everyone wanted a piece of me but not… well not for me. They wanted my fame, my wealth, my name, my power but not me. I … I hated it. I still do.” He admitted, his chest feeling lighter having said the words out loud. “I know I shouldn’t complain I … things could have been so much worse. It’s a miracle I’m even alive at all but all things said and done it’s still impossible to know who to trust.”

Merlin nodded, his hand instinctively reaching for Harry’s arm and squeezing it in support. Harry smiled as he covered the hand with his own in acknowledgment and thanks. 

Merlin sighed as Harry waited for him to speak, he could tell that Merlin wanted to say something but he struggled to get the words out. 

“I know the feeling well.” He admitted finally. “Death was right when she told you that I go by many names and identities. As time went on, and people knew of me, all they wanted was power. I bore that cross during Arthur’s life because I had to.” His voice wavered as he said the kings name but Harry’s hand was immediately on his, comforting him. Listening to him. Hearing him. Merlin tried to not let his eyes water as he continued. 

“So when Camelot fell, I faked my own death. I allowed myself to become lost in the pages of history books, and I took on a new identity every few decades. At least that way I knew that the people who wanted me in their life wanted me and not the legend of Merlin.” He explained as Harry quickly reached for a box of tissues. Merlin smiled as he took one and dabbed his eyes quickly. 

“We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Harry offered but Merlin immediately shook his head. 

“I… it’s been so long and it … it feels good to finally be able to tell someone. I was so scared for so long. It’s a relief…” Merlin finally admitted. Harry smiled brightly back at him. He had never imagined Merlin as a person before but seeing the man in front of him he couldn’t help but feel for him. As powerful as he may be he’s still just a person and one who was clearly suffering. 

“I get that I can’t count how many times I’ve considered changing my name and starting over somewhere no one knows me. It seems easier than trying to force yourself to trust the intentions of the people around you.” Harry sympathized. 

“It is. Easier I mean. But then there’s the fact that I couldn’t ever give 100% of myself to a single person. I could only give them the version of myself I was trying to be in that moment, in that identity, in that lifetime.” Merlin admitted aloud and Harry nodded in understanding. 

“I dated a muggle once a few years ago. She was kind and sweet but no matter how much time passed I always felt lonely when I was with her. Cause she couldn’t ever know all of me. You know?” Harry offered in return. 

“It’s been a very lonely life time.” Marlin admitted, his voice tight as he thought of the totality of his existence. 

“It helps when you have friends who you can trust.” Harry offered 

Merlin smiled as he thought about his past. Gaius, Lancelot, Gwain, Leon and Gwen coming to mind immediately. His heart clenched at the thought of them. 

“Do you have friends like that? Who you can trust?” Merlin asked curiously. 

“Oh yeah to a fault. That’s a picture of them to your left.” Merlin turned to the side table and there were two picture frames set on the side table. One with a couple and a baby and the second a picture of a much younger Harry and two others laughing and smiling. He lifted the picture to bring it closer. 

Harry quickly pointed out Ron and Hermione with a bright smile. “They’re the best a guy can have. They’re the only reason I was even able to find you, they’ll be quite cross with me when they find out I went to Avalon without them. Ron’s quite obsessed with the old stories.” He said with a smile. 

“Do you think… if I tell them will they-“ Merlin’s question hung in the air between them. 

“You don’t have to. I mean Hermione’s wicked smart and Ron’s a brilliant Auror so they’ll probably figure it out on their own. They know what death told me about you so-“

“So they know I’m ancient?” Merlin joked only for Harry to hit him with a throw pillow. “Hey!” Merlin shouted as he pulled the pillow away from him. 

“Are you ever going to drop that? I will start calling you old man if you tempt me.” Harry joked as Merlin laughed and threw the throw pillow back at him. 

“Honestly you’re a menace.” He laughed with a shake of his head. “So what do we do about your friends? Should we tell them?” Merlin wondered aloud. 

“Naw let’s see how long it takes them to figure it out. Unless of course you want to. It’s completely your decision.” Harry offered 

“This sounds like fun. Okay but then I can’t tell them my actual name.” Merlin considered. 

“Don’t look at me I’m terrible at picking names. Ron and Hermione banned me from even trying to name their kids.” Harry said with his hands up. He’d made the mistake of offering Albus as a name suggestion and Hermione had promptly thrown a shoe at him. 

“What names were you choosing? You know what I’d rather not know. Let’s go with Martin I’ve always preferred that name.” Merlin quickly offered. It had been at least 300 years since he had last used that name and he was happy to bring it back into rotation. 

“You’ll need a last name. And a back story, if not for Ron and Hermione then for the rest of the people you’ll meet.” Harry offered. 

“Emerson, I’ve always liked that name. How’s this for a backstory? I was raised in the country side by my mother who taught me magic at home. She passed away unexpectedly and I’ve been on my own ever since?” Merlin offered with ease. This was a fact of his life, every few decades he had a new name, a new identity, a new story. He was an actor and the world was always his stage. It was a fact of his life even in Camelot and being forced into the shadows only helped him sharpen his silver tongue. 

“Oh how about this, you and I met while I was in Scotland. I saw you use magic and so we became friends and I didn’t want to leave you alone so I’ve convinced you to move to London with me?” Harry added. 

“Yes exactly! Do you think anyone will buy it?” Merlin wondered. 

“Probably, the press might be a little annoying but who cares about them.” Harry said offhandedly. 

“Press? How famous are you?” Merlin questions to which Harry looked resigned. 

“Too much for my taste. There’s not much that can be done about that I suppose.” The green eyed boy admitted. 

“Can I … can I ask why?” Merlin had been curious about it all day, how could a wizard have become so powerful at such an early age? It was far from normal. Most witches and wizards had little power and required spells and wands to enhance their abilities. Harry on the other hand had magic as strong as the priests and priestess of the old religion but seemed to lack even a basic understanding of what that meant. Images of himself and his first years in Camelot came to mind almost immediately. 

Harry looked pensive again for a moment as he collected himself. One of the few plus sides of his fame was he never had to talk about his past to others. They already knew so he was often saved from having to open up in this way. 

“There was a prophecy. A dark wizard rose to power around the time I was born. His name was Voldemort.” Harry admitted. Merlin’s eyes widened, he had no idea that in his absence someone of that nature had risen to power. 

“The prophecy said that I would be the one to destroy him. I was a baby and my parents went into hiding but they were betrayed. He found us and they tried to protect me but-“ Harry’s eyes watered at the thought of his parents. They were younger than he was now when they died. They were so so young.

Merlin reached out to grasp the boys hand once again before squeezing it gently. 

“I’m sorry. Had I known I -“

“No. It’s no one’s fault but the man who killed them and the man who betrayed them. We can’t fight fate.” Harry interjected. He refused to go down this path once more and lose himself to the ideas of what could have been. 

“You’re far wiser than I would expect from someone so young.” Merlin admitted to which Harry smiled softly in return. 

“I’ve lived a lot of life in my short years.” Harry admitted sadly. 

“Can I ask what happen to you?” Merlin asked uncertainly to which Harry nodded. 

“My parents died protecting me. My mother used her magic to protect me so when Voldemort tried to use a killing curse on me-“

“It didn’t work?” Merlin asked in shock as Harry reached up to his scar. 

“All that was left was this. He accidentally placed a piece of his soul in my body.” Harry explained. 

“A horcrux.” Merlin added grimly to which Harry nodded. 

“One of many he created. He lost most of his powers that night but after that he… he spent years trying to kill me through different means. He returned to his full power when I was just 14. He waged a war when I was 17 and we fought against him. We were able to defeat him and in the process I became the master of death.” Harry explained as concisely as he could. 

“How… I mean you were a horcrux so you would have had to-“

“Die? Yeah. Something like that.” Harry explained. 

“And the stone, the wand and the cloak?” Merlin asked. 

“The stone was lost, the cloaks up stairs and the wand… well that’s a little more complicated.”

“But the stone is gone? You’re sure of it? That thing has caused- wait what do you mean about the wand? Where is it? It’s capable of causing terrible things in the wrong hands!” Merlin panicked as he remembered the ways it had been used by dark wizards in the past. 

“See that’s what I was afraid of. So I broke it-“

“YOU BROKE IT?!” Merlin shouted as he got to his feet immediately panicking. 

“There’s nothing to worry about! It was years ago and I feel great-“ Harry tried to pacify only to watch Merlin’s eyes nearly bulge from his head. He couldn’t help but to think him and Hermione would get along swimmingly if given the chance to panic together. 

“It’s a magical relic forged by Death herself! It is a conduit for the magic of the old religion a weaker wizard would have been ripped to pieces with the force of its magic!” Merlin shouted his mind working a mile a minute trying to understand how this was even possible and what this could mean. 

“Death didn’t seem too worried.” Harry offered only for Merlin to glare at him. 

“You two really deserve one another. Honestly this is madness do you even know how to control the magic? How to use it?” Merlin hoped against all hope he got a positive answer. 

“It’s not really come up. I mean I use my magic a lot and I think my controls alright. I’ve been to Hogwarts and Auror training does that count?” Harry offered only to watch Merlin smack himself on the forehead in exasperation. 

“I can’t even believe what I’m hearing! And I’m the one Deaths worried about? She and I are going to have words about this!” Merlin exclaimed in frustration as he began pacing Harry’s living room floor. 

“It’s honestly alright. I’m sure I’ll be fine.” Harry offered to try and calm the angry sorcerer. 

“You’re right! You will be because I’ll take care of this. I’ll teach you myself.” Merlin resolved to which Harry’s brows shot to the top of his head. 

“You? Want to teach me?” Harry asked curiously. 

“Does that sounds like a bad idea?” Merlin challenged to which Harry shook his head no emphatically. 

“I’ve been told that I’m not exactly the most studious of wizards.” Harry offered in explanation to which Merlin laughed. 

“I wasn’t the best student either in my day but to hell with it what’s the worst that could happen?” Merlin found himself saying as Harry smiled and nodded in return. 

“Now I like the sound of that!” Harry agreed. 

Merlin collapsed back on to the sofa before turning back to a still smiling Harry. The moment their eyes met they both began to laugh in a way that couldn’t be stopped the entirety of the situation was mental and yet both of them couldn’t help but to admit that something about this just felt right. 

Chapter Text

It had been half a day since Merlin left Avalon and to his surprise, his world had not fallen apart at the seams around him. This was shocking for one simple reason. Merlin had spent the last hundred years adamant that that's exactly what would happen if he did leave Avalon. 

Was it logical? No. Was it the reason Merlin could feel his hands sweating and his heart beating faster and faster by the second? Absolutely. No matter how many times Merlin tried to reassure himself that everything was okay he couldn’t convince his body that this was the case. 

He had retired to bed less than an hour ago and everything was setting him off. The house creaked in ways he wasn’t used to. The light from the window cast strange shadows on the walls. Things that had never seemed to bother him were at the forefront of his mind. Even the blankets were too close and he felt constricted by them.

Finally, he decided that he couldn’t take it anymore and he pushed himself off the bed as he began to pace. His mind was whirling up a storm as he considered all of the things that could go wrong tomorrow. He wanted to scream in frustration but instead, he let his fingernails dig into his arm as he let the pain anchor him. Before long he felt the sting of the cut and the drops of blood through his fingers. He breathed as he tried to control himself, the pain working to counteract the panic and clear his mind for a glorious moment.

He had to force himself to ease his grip, and a part of him, a desperate and weak part of him craved more, craved to have that clarity for a moment longer. He couldn’t, wouldn’t let himself give in but he didn’t know if he could help himself when left alone with his thoughts. 

He used his magic to clean himself up before grabbing the robe Harry had given him earlier that night and making his way down the hall to Harry’s room. 

He didn’t want to knock. Harry was probably asleep. This was ridiculous! What had he been thinking? He considered walking away but he'd already made it so far so he quickly knocked on the door before he could talk himself out of it. 

Before long he heard rustling and the door burst open to a sleepy but alert Harry. 

“What’s wrong are we under attack?” He immediately jumped to which Merlin quickly shook his head to rid him of the fear. 

Harry swore under his breath as he used his wand to conjure his glasses and allowed himself to take in the sorcerer in front of him. His eyes widened in shock as he quickly pulled Merlin into the room and sat him in his giant reading chair in the corner. 

“Hey it’s okay just breath with me. Yeah that’s right one slow breath in and another out. That’s it you’re okay.” Harry counselled as he did the breathing exercises alongside Merlin. One minute turned to two and then to ten as Harry patiently waited for Merlin’s nervous system to regulate itself. 

Finally Merlin felt like there was air in his lungs and his head no longer felt like it was floating. Harry’s hands stayed on his upper arm grounding him as he came back to himself from his moment of hysteria. 

“I’m sorry-“

“Don’t apologize for this. It’s normal to panic when you’re in a new place. It’s okay.” Harry tried to console but Merlin was so frustrated with himself for this. 

“I don’t do this! I don’t- I just.” He couldn’t even clearly articulate what he was feeling. He hadn’t even consciously realized his fingers were threaded through his hair and he was tugging on them in frustration until Harry gently pulled his hands away. 

“Hey hey it’s okay just breath with me. It’s been two hundred years it’s okay if you can’t adjust to things over night. Hell I spent my first month here changing and renovating everything I could get my hands on. I painted this entire room purple at 3 am cause I had a nightmare once.” Harry comforted to which Merlin looked around the room confused. 

“Your walls are cream coloured” he pointed out to which Harry looked embarrassed. 

“Yeah I painted them twice more after that.” He said with a chuckle. 

Merlin smiled softly back at him, his mind still caught in the tailgate of a spiral he couldn’t seem to grasp and control. Harry pushed to hair out of his eyes and met his eyes with a look of determination. 

“You don’t have to do this alone. Talk to me.” Harry practically begged as he kneeled on the floor next to him. His hand now encompassing Merlin’s in support and comfort. 

“I…I’m scared. What if this is a bad idea?” He forced himself to whisper out loud. 

“Go on. Tell me what you’re afraid of.” He asked gently. 

Merlin’s eyes watered as images of Arthur came to mind unwillingly. His laugh, his smile, his watery grave in Avalon. He should be with him. 

“Arthur. He’s waiting for me. He- I can’t leave him. I can’t. What if he comes back and I’m- I’m not there? He- that’s all I have-” Merlin whispered his tear falling even when he tried to keep them in. 

Harry was immediately sitting himself next to him on the chair and pulling him into a hug and all of a sudden it was like the flood gates opened. For years he had been alone carrying the weight of his past, of his existence and his fate on his shoulders. To survive he had buried the pain as far down as it would go with the hope of just making it to Arthur’s revival. 

He had pushed himself and pushed himself as far as he could and now over a millennium later he was cracking under the weight of his unending destiny. This was torture when all he wanted, all he’d ever wanted was just to be at Arthur’s side, but instead he’s forced to walk amongst the living and Arthur is without him on the other side of the veil. They could not be together in life because Arthur died so damn young and now they could not even be together in death. It was cruel in a way he couldn’t allow himself to fathom until now. 

Harry didn’t let him go once. He held him as he cried, whispered soothing words he couldn’t truly process as he let him cry on his shoulder for what felt like forever. His hand rubbing Merlins back as he let him get it all out. 

When his sobs finally turned to sniffles Merlin quickly tried to wipe his tears but Harry stopped him. 

“You have nothing to be ashamed of.” He whispered as he just held Merlin tighter for a couple more moments. The silence of the night was comforting because in that moment it was just the two of them. 

Harry finally broke the silence as he pulled away and sat back in the armrest. Far enough to give Merlin some room but close enough for him to know he wasn’t alone. 

“What was he like? Arthur? I mean I don’t want to upset you. We don’t have to talk about it if you’d like.” Harry offered as Merlin smiled softly back at him his eyes misty once again. 

“It’s okay. It’s been a long long time since someone asked me that.” Merlin admitted “I… I miss him. A lot. I never got past his death. Others I can grieve and mourn and miss but him… his death still feels like an open wound.”

Harry nodded his eyes looking away and watering as he thought about Sirius and Remus. His heart clenching as he thought of Tonks and Fred. 

“I… I understand. When- I lost my godfather when I was 15. I was the reason he died and I never- I can’t forget it. He deserved to live and I was the reason he was wrongfully imprisoned in Azkaban, the reason my parents were targeted and murdered. And then I was the reason he died. He never even got a chance in this life and I-… He wasn’t the only one. So many people were lost and I-“ Merlin pulled Harry in this time and held him tightly as they both allowed themselves a moment to just feel the weight of their grief. 

“I wish I could tell you there was a reason for it. For the suffering. For the grief. But I- I haven’t found one yet.” Merlin comforted as best he could all things considered. 

Harry nodded softly in understanding. Life wasn’t full of explanations and justifications. More often then not all you got from life were more questions and it was easier then not to just lose yourself to wondering why things had happen at all and what life could have been like if they hadn’t. 

“I’d like to give up trying to find a reason at this point. The other option feels too-“

“Painful?” Merlin supplied. 

Harry nodded solemnly as he finally turned back to Merlin and took him in. In that moment he decided that he might not know this man all that well yet but he wouldn’t abandon him to his solitude again. 

Merlin smiled softly back at him before rubbing the tears out of his eyes with a fury. 

“No more crying. You… you wanted to know about Arthur?” His voice cracked unwillingly and Harry shook his head softly. 

“You don’t have to. I mean we don’t have to it’s okay-“

“I… I want to. I don’t want to keep him a secret.” Merlin interjected. 

Harry nodded and smiled back in support.

“Tell me. I mean I don’t know about you but I find talking to a stranger is easier sometimes.” 

“What happen to being friends?” Merlin joked to which Harry shoved him in jest. 

“Well we just held each other while we cried at 2 in the morning. If that’s not friendship I don’t know what is.” Harry joked to which Merlin finally laughed. Harry couldn’t help but smile brightly back at him in pride. He was opening up and nothing made Harry happier than being able to pull that out of him. “So King Arthur?” 

Merlin was immediately somber as his name was said and something about it sat badly with Harry. Merlin looked like he had been kissed by a dementor, like the happiness was sucked right out of him all of a sudden. 

“He was a good king and a better man.” Merlin response was so rehearsed that it made Harry cringe. 

“Damn tell me how you really feel.” He joked only for Merlin to shove him in return the soft smile already returning to his face. Harry felt such a sense of accomplishment in annoying Merlin that he truly understood why Fred and George had loved to terrorize their family and friends. 

“Shut up it’s true. He was a great king he was fair and just and loyal to a fault-“

Harry pretended to fall asleep on his shoulder and began to snore as Merlin shoved him again. 

“You ass!” He shouted with a laugh as Harry smiled and laughed with him. 

“What? Be more interesting you’re Merlin for goodness sake. And all you’ve got for me is he was noble? Please tell me he’s not as boring as he sounds-“

“HA! Boring he wouldn’t give me a second of peace! Do you know how many times I had to save his life? From dragons to witches to trolls to other humans, he was a literal magnet for chaos. It didn’t help that he was arrogant and bull headed. God forbid he ever had to admit he was wrong he would rather eat his own crown-“ Merlin complained in a tirade that made Harry begin to laugh. 

“Now he sounds like my type of guy. I always like them arrogant and bossy” He joked only for Merlin to glare back at him. 

“Don’t even joke. He was dosed with a love spell once and I nearly lost my lunch seeing him all googly eyed.” Merlin remembered with a shudder. 

“So you and him weren’t-“ Harry left the sentence unfinished but let his eyebrows do the remainder of the talking. 

Merlin smacked Harry upside the head at the insinuation. 

“Did you really learn nothing in your history of magic class? He was married to Gwen. Guinevere? The Queen of Camelot?” Merlin couldn’t believe that he knew so little about this. While the muggles had relegated the stories to nothing but myth those in the magical world knew them all too well. 

Harry for his part didn’t look abashed and rolled his eyes. “Okay okay married man got it. Doesn’t mean he can’t also like men. Look at me I like men and women it’s not that big of a deal.” Harry commented to which Merlin’s eyes widened in surprise. 

“To think that you can just admit-“

“Oh my god you’ve missed the sexual revolution!” Harry exclaimed. 

“The what?” Merlin couldn’t believe what he was hearing. For the entirety of his existence homosexual relationships had been taboo at best and illegal at worst. Such notions would have heralded a death sentence under Uther’s reign. 

“Okay we need to get you some history books. Listen I’m not saying that things are perfect and everyone’s accepting and welcoming of relationships between two men or two women but it’s not like in the past. We can be whoever we wish to be and we won’t be persecuted for that.” Harry assured gently to which Merlin’s eyes widened in surprise. 

“You… you mean that? You truly mean that?” He asked almost hopefully. 

Harry smiled back at him softly and nodded. He knew the feeling of relief as he watched the pressure practically lift from Merlin’s shoulders as that reality sank in. He had felt the same way when he finally came out to Ron and Hermione after the war. He’d never forget the assurances they gave him or the way they’d hugged him and accepted him when he was so sure he’d be mistreated. He had to remind himself over and over again that the Dursleys prejudices were not adopted by everyone. 

“You can be whoever you want to be Merlin. You can live openly and honestly- I mean if you are? I’m not saying that-“

“I am. I mean I… I like both men and women. Always have it’s just- it was always hidden and behind closed doors.” He admitted as he thought about his previous lovers over the years. The fear of exposure and the lengths he saw people go through to protect themselves and to not fall from grace in the eyes of their society sat heavy on his heart. He had spent so many years hiding and in the shadows, first hiding his magic, then his identity and then his sexuality on top of that was just exhausting. 

Harry nodded as he thought about his own coming out. It had taken him years to even accept himself for who he was never mind the weight of everyone else’s judgments. 

“Well I can’t guarantee the world at large but I can promise that I’ll always accept you. For who you are that is.” Harry offered to which Merlin smiled. 

“Harry… Thankyou.” The acceptance had meant so much to him in that moment that he almost couldn’t believe it. The idea that anyone would accept him for who he was. All of who he was was still jarring. 

“So was he fit?” Harry asked with a waggle of his eyebrows that caused Merlin to shove him again before both of them devolved into a fit of laughter. 

“Like you couldn’t imagine. I was his manservant and let me tell you I nearly gasped every time he took his shirt off.” Merlin admitted aloud for the first time in his existence. Harry nodded with a smirk. 

“So you two weren’t?-“

“No you ass he was married. He loved Gwen and I was … just me. Things weren’t like that between us we were friends yeah but not. No he was my king and I was his loyal servant.” Merlin explained his voice somber by the end. 

“In like a sexy way?” Harry hypothesized only to get shoved again. 

“You’re a menace you know that?” Merlin said with a laugh, he couldn’t remember the last time he could even think about Arthur without being in tears and here he was joking about him. 

Harry laughed in response, his smile was infectious and Merlin was drawn in hook line and sinker. 

“Yeah I’ve been advised, speaking of which how about tomorrow we hit the town? I was thinking we go do some shopping and then if you’re up for it I can introduce you to Ron and Hermione. You’d like them I reckon.” Harry offered. 

“Yeah sure why the hell not. They can’t possibly be as annoying as you?” Merlin joked to which Harry laughed. 

“Well we’ll just have to see about that now won’t we?” He said with a smile to which Merlin couldn’t help but to smile in return. 

Chapter Text

Harry was correct when he had assured Merlin that the wizarding world would be far more comfortable for him than the muggle world. As he walked through Diagon Ally he felt almost at ease. It was as though things were largely the same as they had been when he left. 

The faces were different and the clothing had changed a fair bit but the rows of streets, the old shops, the bustling nature of it all was still the same as it had always been. Here he wasn’t so much of a fish out of water. 

Harry on the other hand couldn’t take more than a few steps without being gawked at or approached. It was honestly funnier then he expected it to be, the Harry he had met was confident and self assured but in the face of popularity he balked and was more awkward then not. A fact that did nothing but amuse the sorcerer. 

“It’s not funny!” Harry whispered as he finally pulled himself away from two young witches who were adamant about getting his autograph. 

“That’s where you’re wrong my friend that was down right hilarious.” Merlin snickered as he led them towards Gringots. 

Harry quickly elbowed Merlin which only made his snicker even more. 

“Look right there, that’s Weasleys Wizard Wheezes. It’s owned by my friend George I’ll take you round after we’re done at the bank.” Harry proudly pointed out. Merlin smiled and happily agreed, nothing sounded better than a trip to a joke shop. 

“Hopefully we can finish up at the bank quickly. I’m sure I left my wand in my vault and I’d rather not get a new one.” Merlin grumbled as they continued down the street still attracting far more attention then Merlin would have expected. He felt a little like a person on display at a human zoo. A practice from the past that he hoped was long gone by now. 

“Yeah but it’ll give us a break from all the staring.” Harry complained. 

“You know when you told me you were popular I didn’t think it was this noticeable.” Merlin admitted. Harry nodded sombrely in return. 

“I had hoped it would calm down after the war but the press likes to keep me in the headlines.” Harry emphasized the point by picking up an abandoned daily prophet off the floor quickly flipping through it and finding a new article about himself and handing it to Merlin.  

“This says that you’re involved in an illicit relationship with a Luna Lovegood? Oh is this her picture? Shes very pretty!” Merlin teased to which Harry grabbed the newspaper and swatted his arm with it. 

“Not even close she’s a good friend from Hogwarts and I saw her for coffee. Next thing I know we’re apparently planning for a baby.” Harry complained as he waved at a child trying to get his attention a distance away. The child’s face practically lit up from the tiny action and Merlin couldn’t help but notice how happy it made Harry. 

“Is that why they’re asking readers to write in their baby name suggestions?” Merlin joked to which Harry glared. 

“As if I’d let a random person name my kid.” 

“I always thought Merlin was a rather fetching name.” The sorcerer offered jokingly. 

“Don’t joke or I’ll hold you to it.” Harry clapped back only for Merlin to laugh along with him. 

As they entered Gringotts Harry looked around and noticed most of the Goblins were watching them immediately. Except it wasn’t him who they were watching. 

“This is a little creepy.” Harry whispered to the sorcerer as he laughed and made his way up to the front desk to speak to the head goblin. 

“I would like to access my vaults.” Merlin stated without elaborating. Harry’s eyes widened as the head goblin immediately appeared next to them. 

“Please allow me to guide you!” He exclaimed almost reverently as he hurried the men into the vaults. Harry took a cursory look around and thanked his lucky stars there weren’t too many wizards in the bank but those that were, were clearly taking notice.  

Quickly they were taken onto the trolly and led deep into the heart of the vaults further than Harry had even thought possible. Suddenly they arrived at a vault with a large doorway and Harry stood back waiting for the goblin to open it but instead he got back on the trolly. 

“You’re not leaving us down here are you?” He demanded but Merlin quickly waved him off. 

“No one is allowed to see the inside of this vault without my permission. Thank you sir I will call when I’m ready to leave.” Merlin addressed the head goblin and bowed his thanks. 

The head goblin bowed in return. “It is always an honour Emrys.” He said before leaving them. 

Merlin waited until he knew they were alone before turning to the gate and whispering for the gates to open with words only a dragon could understand. Harry looked both shocked and confused at the words he couldn’t comprehend but suddenly the doors opened and all he could do was stare. 

The vault was enormous, far bigger than any he had ever seen before and it was covered in gold galleons and riches the likes of which were beyond his comprehension. The walls were lined with what must have been expensive works of art and on the far wall there was gigantic bookshelves covered in books and items. 

“What-“

“It’s an exceptionally long lifetimes worth of riches.” Merlin admitted as he made his way into the vault. His eyes searching for the wand he had come here to find. 

Harry couldn’t believe his ears. This was insane, it was less the money that surprised him but rather the artifacts. The room was filled with different items, vases and ornate boxes. There was more jewelry than he’d ever seen before in his life. It was too much to take in all at once and that was coming from him. The owner of the Potter and Black vaults and fortunes. 

“And I thought I was rich.” He joked to which Merlin laughed. 

“Live for 1500 years and see how far that gets you.” He joked to which Harry laughed as he continued to look around. Suddenly a necklace caught his eye, the ruby at its centre was so large he couldn’t help but to reach for it but immediately Merlin caught his hand. 

“Careful it’s enchanted. Most of the stuff I’ve kept in here for safe keeping.” He explained as Harry immediately pulled back his had as though he’d just been burned. 

“You’re joking. Why the hell are you holding onto all of it then?” He asked incredulously as he wondered why not just destroy the things if they were so dangerous. 

Merlin shook his head with a smile as he continued to peruse the vault, his eyes lingering on one thing or another as the items brought back memories of his various lives. 

“It’s not that simple. Some are indestructible, others if broken can be dangerous. There’s also items that could come in handy again like my wand. Best to be prepared I recon?” Merlin explained as he caught sight of the pile he was looking for. 

“And the books?” Harry asked 

“Same thing. This isn’t even all my books, in my home there’s a grand library filled with a copy of every book I’ve ever come across.” Merlin explained casually like such a thing was routine. 

“Of every- wait your home? Do you mean in Avalon? Thats brilliant you’re going to have to show me even though I’ve never been all that big of a reader. Hermione will lose her mind if she sees it. I recon she read every book the library had in Hogwarts.” 

Merlin smiled as the thought. “Not in Avalon I have a home I used to live in, but the elves have been caring for it in my absence along with the library. Keeping record of all magical knowledge is part of why I collected them. In my day magic was outlawed and the books that held the practice of the old religion were burned and lost. My teacher had saved a single book. He gave it to me when I first came to Camelot and if it were found we’d have both been dead.” Merlin reminisced sadly and he looked through the pile of treasures he was digging through. 

Harry froze as he turned back to Merlin. He knew that magical persecution was a part of their history but it had felt surreal before then. He thought of Hermione when they were young. Bright eyed and talented, she was so thirsty for knowledge. The idea that the pursuit of it could have meant her very death was chilling. 

“Was it… were you ever?” The question was practically whispered but it sat heavy between them. Merlin stood up and turned back to Harry before smiling softly. The memories of that time were from so long ago but the pain was still so real in Merlin’s eyes that smiling through it wasn’t enough to hide it. 

“Yeah I… I had a knack for getting into trouble. There were a few close calls but I managed to avoid death.” Merlin admitted Harry nodded sombrely. 

“Thats why … I mean us living separate from the muggles, going to school at Hogwarts-“

“It was safer that way yes. Magic is a tool but to those who do not understand it, it can only be seen as a weapon. I can’t count how many people I watched lose their lives for that fear. Adults, women, children. All of them hunted and murdered and back then… I was helpless to stop it.” Merlin admitted, his guilt still eating away at him as he thought back to his youth and all the things he could have done differently. 

He hadn’t even noticed Harry was moving until he was in front of him shaking him out of his reverie. 

“Don’t lose yourself in the past it’s not going to do you much good.” Harry warned to which Merlin smiled in response. 

“I know I know-“

“Plus you should be proud. If it wasn’t for you none of us, none of this would be here. Do you know how many witches and wizards have made their way through Hogwarts. How many people were able to study magic and live full and happy lives all because of you?” He couldn’t help but to be grateful to him in that moment. He was a product of Merlin’s sacrifices. Their entire society was and for the first time in his life Harry truly felt thankful for those who had paved the way before him. It was easier to do so when the history was a living breathing person right in front of him and not just a name in an old dusty text book. 

Merlin smiled and nodded softly back at Harry. He was right, he knew that but he couldn’t help but wish he had done more. 

“It does make me happy. The idea of little witches and wizards being able to learn magic without fear.” Merlin admitted. “I remember when Hogwarts was founded, the day it opened its doors was one of the happiest moments of my life.” 

“You were there?!” Harry was shocked, it shouldn’t have been that surprising all things considered but he couldn’t help it. 

Merlin laughed and nodded “Yeah well I wasn’t going to miss an event like that now was I?” He joked when suddenly something caught his eye and he quickly walked to the other side of the vault. 

“There it is! I was looking in the wrong place this whole time!” He shouted as he reached another pile of artifacts and pulled out a velvet box. 

“Bout time I was worried we’d be digging for it for the next hundred years.” Harry teased. 

“Oh hush I can’t just use any old wand. I made this one myself-“

“You can make wands?” 

“I don’t exactly love the process it’s quite meticulous but yes. And this is my masterpiece.” Merlin gloated as he opened the box and took out the wand within. “English oak and dragon heartstring. A true beauty.” 

Harry nodded as he took a close look at it. The wand of Merlin himself was practically a wonder of the magical world. “It’s nice!” He offered as he tried to feign enthusiasm only for Merlin to roll his eyes. 

“Such brilliant workmanship is lost on you honestly!” He chastised but Harry only chuckled. 

He stood back as he watched Merlin continue to try move the wand in his hand before testing out his spells. 

For a moment Harry looked around at the vaults in front of him and considered what Merlin had said. He couldn’t imagine what his friends would say if they knew he was here. 

“What’s got you so lost in thought?” Merlin asked, startling Harry out of his reverie. 

“Thinking about how many people would kill to be here in my place.” He answered honestly pulling another chuckle from Merlin. 

“And all you wanted was my friendship.” He teased to which Harry laughed. 

“This all seems like far too much trouble if I’m honest.” He admitted. 

“We need to get you properly tested.  There’s no way that head of yours is working right.” Merlin teased while paying Harry no mind. A part of him had worried Harry’s nature would change in response to the riches and treasures in his vaults but just like he’d assured himself Harry was unbothered by what he saw. 

“Hey! I’m a little oblivious but I’m not an idiot  “ he attempted to defend himself but Merlin continued unbothered as he cast a searching spell. 

“I thought you said you were an auror? Aren’t you lot meant to be observant?” Merlin finally clapped back. 

“Only when it serves me.” Harry countered as he watched a few boxes float towards Merlin. “What you got there? More jewelry boxes? For someone with so many jewels you don’t seem to wear all that much.”

Merlin smiled as he opened them up unveiling two identical emerald rings. Merlin picked one box and handed the other to
Harry. 

“What’s this? A ring? I’m not much into jewelry myself.” 

“Shut up and put it on. You can use the two to communicate with one another. One drop of blood and it’s activate and we will be able to speak. It’ll also tell me if you’re in mortal danger. This way if you’re ever in trouble I can come find you.” Merlin explained but Harry’s brows almost immediately shot up to his hair line. 

“Merlin that’s blood magic! It’s illegal!” Harry practically shouted, he was an Auror for goodness sake he couldn’t be seen running around and breaking the law. 

Merlin rolled his eyes before taking the ring out of the box and taking Harry’s hand to slip the ring on his index finger himself. 

“Most of the items in this vault are technically illegal Harry. Most of the magic I’ve ever learned is not technically legal but there’s a time and a place for such things. The ring is just a ring until it’s used and if we are lucky you won’t need to use it.” Merlin assured him but Harry shook his head softly as he stared down at his hand. 

“That morality of yours comes in lots of shades of grey I see?” Harry teased with a smirk overtaking his face. Merlin smiled at the mischief reflected in Harry’s eyes. 

“Like you wouldn’t believe.” Merlin shrugged with a laugh, his entire existence was one lived in the shadows and if that meant toeing the line when it came to righteousness then so be it. “The ring does match your eyes quite beautifully. Do try not to lose it.” 

Harry couldn’t help but laugh. “Honestly first death and now you. How much trouble do you think I get into?” 

“Death gave you something? I thought it was just the map and the compass?” 

Harry smirked before proudly pulling his new medallion out from underneath his clothing and showing it off the Merlin who whistled at the sight of it. 

“That’s an ancient artifact you know. You best not take it off or go around showing it to ordinary people.” Merlin warned as he came close to look at it. 

“Yeah yeah I’m not an idiot. Though I don’t know what it says about me that both of you worry about what type of trouble I might get myself into.” 

“Yes well we’ve both had the pleasure of meeting you and that on its own is enough.” Merlin teased as he made his way to the entrance. He pulled out a coin purse and pulled more galleons then most could spend in a year into the bag. 

“Won’t that be heavy to carry around?” Harry asked. 

“The bags magic Harry or did you forget.” Merlin poked fun to which Harry rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah yeah laugh it up old man.” He clapped back, dodging just in time as Merlin tried to smack him. 

Chapter Text

“Welcome good sir to Weasleys Wizard Wheezes! Home to the finest of goods! How can I help you today?” The shop keeper greeted as Merlin walked through the front door immediately catching him of guard. 

“Oh um-“

“Ease up George he’s with me.” Harry interjected from behind him. 

The redhead, presumably named George, lit up at the sight of Harry as he jumped over the counter and met Harry half way in a hug. 

“Look who the cat dragged in! You know you missed Sunday dinner and mum is quite cross with you for it.” He immediately lectured. George would never admit it but he really was a lot like his mum and he hated when someone missed their family dinners.

“I know I know I called her the other day and got an ear full. I’m helping her cook a roast next Sunday to make up for it.” Harry smiled to himself at the chastising. No matter how upset they were he could feel how deeply the Weasly’s loved him and he wouldn’t trade that for the world. 

“Merlin’s beard she’s got to be over the moon about that. She loves when you cook with her.” 

Harry snorted as he watched Merlin cringe at the statement. He wasn’t used to the widespread use of his name and by the looks of it he’d never get used to it. 

“So who’s your friend?” George asked with a smirk, his eyebrows insinuating more than he would say out loud.

Harry smacked his arm on instinct. “It’s not like that this is Mer- Martin! Martin Emerson. We met in Scotland and I’ve talked him into shifting to London and moving in with me!” Harry exclaimed proudly and George looked between the two men like they’d each grown a second head. 

“You … what?” George Weasley was actually stunned into silence. That was a first. 

“Yeah I thought he was out of his mind too.” Merlin piped up as George ran a hand over his face. Why they ever left Harry unsupervised was a true wonder. 

“Please tell me you’re not a serial murderer or something.” George asked half seriously as he turned his attention to the young man in front of him.

Merlin’s smiled up at him so brightly that it caught the young merchant off guard. The younger man was downright stunning. 

“Nope no way I just wanted to be left alone with my books and my plants but he wouldn’t let me.” Merlin complained as Harry glared back at him. 

“Hey if I have to live among the people so do you!”

“Mean that’s what it is. Misery love company and all that” he joked in response. 

“You’re driving me crazy on purpose.” 

“That’s what you deserve-“

George watched the two men argue for a moment both going back and forth with one quip and then another. It was obvious that they got along and who was George to question people on their decisions.  

“I like you you’re a funny little thing aren’t you.” George asked after a particularly good quip by Merlin. 

Merlin smiled brightly up at him and the word adorable promptly came to the red heads mind. 

“So Harry mentioned you two are old friends?” Merlin asked curiously only to be met with confusion. 

“Yeah since the day he took his first train to Hogwarts. Do you- I mean have you been living under a rock of something?” George asked with obvious confusion. There was an exposé at least once a month about their friend group. Hell they get articles written about them so often that they’ve made a literal drinking game out of it. 

“Yeah sort of hehe…” Merlin tried to play it off but he honestly had no idea how to pass this off. “Truth be told I haven’t interacted a lot with other wizards my mum she homeschooled me so…” 

George could practically feel the discomfort radiating off the young man at the topic of conversation. 

“Ahh got it I’ve got a distant cousin like that. Prefers to stay off the grid. He barely leaves his house the old recluse his parents were the same way so don’t pay it any mind. How’d Harry convince you to come to London then?” George couldn’t help but to take pity on the man he seemed so uncomfortable that he had to help pave the way for him. 

“He threatened to annoy me to death unless I agreed.” Merlin supplied cheekily. 

“Hey! I-“ “yeah that sounds about right.”Both the boys began at once. Harry couldn’t help but huff and pout as George and Merlin laughed at his expense. 

“So tell me Martin how do you feel about helping me test out some products?”

“Holy shit George no-“

“I’d love to help!” Merlin happily agreed much to Harry’s horror. 

George practically lit up with glee as he showed them to his workshop in the back as he happily supplied Merlin with tinctures and candies to test out their various effects. 

Harry watched in horror as he offered Merlin  a candy that made him spit fire like a literal dragon. He almost cried when Merlin started offering his recommendations on how to make the flames even harsher. 

“Alright if I have to deal with a dark wizard spitting fire at me because of you two I’m burying you both below the earths crust!” He shouted as he rubbed his singed pant leg. Just his luck that both of them would become a pair of deranged pyromaniacs when together. 

The boys giggled as Harry yelled at them both. George caught Merlin’s eye and grinned, his smirk the only warning before he tossed a ball on the floor that burst into smoke. Harry coughed as he waved his hands frantically to clear the way only to shout as he looked down at his now purple hands. 

“DAMN IT GEORGE!” He shouted frantically looking for the other two men, not realizing George had pulled Merlin and himself out of the line of fire to hide behind a cupboard. 

Both the boys took one look at each other and burst out laughing at the sight of their now lavender coloured friend. 

Of course at the exact moment the cloud of smoke disappeared Hermione and Ron walked through the door. 

“Mate why are you purple? It’s not a very flattering…”

“I don’t want to be purple Ron!” He shouted back which only made Merlin and George laugh harder. 

“George please tell me you’ve at least developed an antidote for this one.” Hermione sighed as she came to inspect Harry’s skin. Not hesitating to grab his hand and peer closely at his arm like it was a lab specimen and not her best friend. 

“Hermione I need my arm to murder George!” Harry exclaimed to which Hermione paid him no mind. 

“The concoctions actually sunken into your skin so it must have been a potion. Why would you drink it in the first place?” She reprimanded as she shook her head. 

“I didn’t! I’m not an idiot he had some sort of a smoke bomb!” Harry shouted only for Hermione to pinch her face in concentration as she tried to understand how George created the substance. Ron shook his head and looked around for his brother, quickly finding both George and Merlin hiding behind a cupboard. 

“Found the culprit! Oh hello I’ve never met you before-“

“Ron that’s Martin! The friend I told you about!” Harry jumped in hoping his friend made the connection. 

“Blimey I thought you’d be an old man-“

“It’s a common misconception I just… have an old soul! Yes that’s it I’m an old old soul.” Merlin quickly proclaimed hoping against all hope he wouldn’t be outed too quickly. 

“Really? Cause you’re the most fun I’ve had in ages and your easy in the eyes too.” George flirted with a smirk causing Merlin’s face to heat at the attention. 

“Oh um-“

“Ignore my brother he’s a hopeless flirt and you shouldn’t take a thing he says seriously.” Ron jumped in only for his brother to smack him. 

“Hey that’s not true! I’m just a romantic at heart-“

Merlin laughed as the brothers argued amongst themselves when he noticed a tugging on his pant leg. He looked down in surprise when he noticed a brown eyed bushy haired toddler looking up at him. 

“Oh hello!” He said before sinking down to meet her eye. 

Hermione happily walked over and bent down next to her daughter. “I’m Hermione and this little one is my daughter Rose. Rose why don’t you say hello to Martin.”

“‘Ello Mar’in!” She greeted with a big toothy smile and Merlin felt his heart melt at the sight. 

“Hello Rose. You have a very pretty name.” He said with a smile.

“It’s my favourite flower!” She exclaimed like the flower was the most beautiful thing in the world. 

Merlin smiled before looking around and making sure no one but Hermione and Rose were watching before balling his fist and blowing on it. His eyes flashed gold and when he opened his fist a red rose bloomed from his palm. 

Rose screeched with laughter as she reached for it and pulled it to her nose. The boys turned to see what the commotion was about as Rose thanked Merlin. 

He smiled brightly down at her before noticing that Hermione was shocked frozen. 

“How…how did you?”

Merlin smiled at the young witch and winked. “If you live long enough you learn a thing or two.”

Hermione’s eyes lit up as she jumped up, enthusiasm practically exuding from her aura. “You have to teach me! I mean- if it’s alright I just-“

Merlin smiled and nodded “I’m always happy to impart some knowledge, the concept seems lost on that one.” Merlin joked as he pointed at Harry who was in the midst of drinking what must have been an antidote for his current colouring.  

“Oi! I heard that!” He shouted back before leaning down and hoisting Rose up into his arms. She wasted no time in sticking the flower in his nose and demanding he smell how pretty it was. 

“You can’t smell beauty darling.” Ron added as he patted his daughter’s head before turning to Merlin. “Nice to meet you Martin, anyone who makes my daughter laugh like that is alright it my books. I’m Ron by the way, Ron Weasley.” 

“It’s very nice to meet you!” He said raising his hand to shake, Ron happily met him half way and smiled. 

“So tell me Martin how’d Harry manage to drag you out here? You sounded like one hell of a recluse when he’d talked about you.”

“Ronald you can’t just say things like that!” Hermione exclaimed, her husband was too crass for his own good. 

“I’d say recluse is an understatement if I’m honest.” He admitted with an awkward laugh. 

“And I can be very persuasive!” Harry interjected. 

“You mean annoying” Merlin shot back.

“Hey you have to admit you’re having a great time!” 

Merlin rolled his eyes in fake annoyance and sighed “Fine, you may have a point.” He admitted begrudgingly much to Harry’s excitement. 

“And you haven’t seen nothing yet! Have you ever been to a quidditch game?” Harry asked only to be met with a glare. 

“Obviously, honestly Harry I’m not entirely divorced from wizarding life-“

“You sure act like it!” He teased in return. 

“There’s a Cannons game next month I’m dying to see. We should all go!” Ron offered immediately, Hermione had been adamant that she wouldn’t accompany him. 

“Sure! I’d love to, I mean if you don’t mind the company.” Merlin couldn’t help but double back he hated the idea of forcing his company on to others but Ron just laughed and shook his head. 

“Nothing would make me happier. You know you’re real polite but you don’t have to be. We’re not the formal stuffy type.” Ron assured him as he smaked him on the back in a good natured sense of showmanship. 

“I… it’s an old habit-“

“You’re not as polite with me anymore at least” Harry jibbed. 

“That’s cause you get under my skin and I forget myself!” Merlin admitted. 

“Well I like it! We love nothing more than an absolute bastard as a friend.” George added much to the horror of Rose. 

“Uncle that’s a bad word! Bad!” She exclaimed as she covered her mouth in shock. Ron and Hermione immediately glaring at George as he raised his hands in mock surrender. 

“Sorry sorry just a slip of the tongue! I’m sorry Rose darling.” He apologized. Rose glared for a moment before seemingly making up her mind. 

“Okay I forgive you!” She exclaimed to which George pulled her into his arms hugging her tight as she giggled. 

“Shes so sweet.” Merlin said softly as he watched her laugh and giggle with her uncles. Ron and Hermione practically beamed. 

“Shes an angel it’s her little brother that’s the demon-“ Ron joked only for his wife to elbow him. 

“He is no such thing he’s just rambunctious.” She immediately corrected as Ron rolled his eyes. 

Merlin laughed “I can’t wait to meet him then I’ve always loved kids.” 

“Now now don’t tell them that next thing you know you’ll be babysitting all the kids and your head will explode.” George teased. 

“Yeah there’s a fair few between me and my brothers and then there’s Teddy.” Ron added. 

“Teddys my godson Em” Harry reminded, he was sure he’d mentioned him at some point or another but he could see the sorcerers eyes light up in recognition. 

“You’ll have to introduce us! And Em? Did you just-“

“It’s a nickname, you do know what those are don’t you?” Harry happily teased much to Merlin’s annoyance. 

“You’re ridiculous-“ Merlin began before George interrupted 

“Em… Em hmm I do like the sound of that.” The red head said as though he was trying the nickname on for size. 

“Em ‘Em Em Em EM!” Rose shrieked at the end directly into her uncles ear. 

“Merlin’s beard why!” George shouted as he pulled her away from his ear as she giggled. Harry couldn’t help but catch Merlin’s eye and laugh as he cringed again. 

“Rose that’s naughty! Apologize the uncle George!” Hermione immediately corrected. 

“Sorry” she mumbled all soft and adorable so that George’s heart would melt at the sight. 

“Aww baby it’s okay!” He exclaimed as he hugged her tight as she began to giggle again. 

“Alright enough shouting, Martin what would you say to a spot of dinner? There’s a new resturaunt by Flourish and Blotts.” Ron offered. 

“Lee will be here in a few minutes to take over for me. You guys go ahead and I can meet you there?” George’s offered. 

“Actually that’s perfect I was hoping to stop by and order a few books.” Hermione added her eyes lighting up as she remembered that she had a list of new books she was dying to get her hands on. 

“Do you mind if I come with you? My book collection needs a bit of a refresh.” Merlin interjected, he would take any opportunity he could to surround himself with books. 

“Of course! I can make recommendations for you as well if you’d like” Hermione happily agreed. 

“Yes please! I haven’t had anything new to read in so long-“

“Hey you’re not allowed to burry yourself in books, you have to actually go outside!” Harry jumped in before Merlin could get any crazy ideas that would lead to further self isolation. 

“You’ll never let me have any fun, will you?” He pouted pathetically causing the others to laugh. 

“Well your more then welcome to come read in here. Kill three birds with one stone?” George happily offered. 

“Three? What’s the third-“ Ron began.

“I’m so glad you asked dear brother the last would be to give me some eye candy! After all I’m an artisan and I of course need a muse-“ George interjected.

“You’re insufferable you know that?” Ron added happily cutting his brother off. “And don’t listen to him he’s an idiot.” Ron counseled Merlin to which he laughed.

“Oh I don’t mind he reminds me of an old friend.” Images of Gwaine came to mind and his heart clenched sadly in his chest.

“Oh no well that just means I have to try harder to set myself apart won’t I?” George offered happily. Merlin couldn’t help but laugh, this was the lightest he’d felt in ages. 

Chapter Text

As Merlin opened the door to Flourish & Blotts he felt a wave of nostalgia pass over him. The piles of old books the scent of their brittle pages and drying ink. The sound of pages turning and whispered exclamations as people found the perfect book. Nothing felt more homely these days than books. After all people could leave him but his books never would. 

“Ahh Ms. Granger to what do I owe the pleasure!” The shop keeper exclaimed the moment his eyes landed on the young witch. 

She smiled brightly back as him as she walked over to the counter and began to rummage through her pockets before pulling out a list from its recesses. 

“Mr. Davies I’m so glad you’re here! Last time I came the young lady was here and she’s not much help when it comes to special orders.” Hermione subtly complained before unfolding the list multiple time. It was so large even Merlin was impressed. 

“Of course of course I’m happy to help just let me get my notebook and we’ll get this all squared away don’t you worry!” He happily added before his eyes turned to Merlin. 

“Oh hello! I don’t think we’ve met I’m Mr. Davies, if you’ll be needing some help just give me a moment-“

“Oh it’s no trouble please take your time! I’ve got quite a large order myself.” Merlin smiled as he snuck a peak at Hermione’s list. “Those titles sound facinating, would you mind letting me borrow them sometime? They all seem to be medical which is my specialty-”

“You’re a healer!?” Hermione explained with such excitement that it actually scared Merlin. There was a fire in her eyes that he usually associated with madness. 

“I’ve always preferred the term physician but yes, though I must admit I’m a little out of practice, actually that’s why I came in here to refresh my book collection.” Merlin explained as he watched the gears spin in Hermione’s mind, he was quickly starting to understand why Harry and Ron were so adamant about not coming into the shop. 

“When you say collection…” Hermione began hoping to fish for further information without asking outright. Merlin smiled before reching down to her ear so only she’d be able to hear him as he spoke. 

“I mean a library containing a copy of every book I’ve been lucky enough to come across.” He whispered, he smirked as he watched her eyes light up. 

“You must take me! I can’t even imagine, I mean you can’t possibly mean every-” 

“Every single one” Merlin confirmed, if Hermione’s head could actually explode it would have at that exact moment.

“Alright I’ve got your list written out Ms. Granger. Now some of these are quite difficult to locate so they may take me some time but I should have most of them ready for pick up by Friday or I can have them sent to your home if you’d like?” Mr. Davis asked without taking his eyes off his notebook and the list, his mind going a mile a minute as he double checked he hadn’t forgotten any. He knew how particular Hermione could be regarding books. 

“That’s perfect please have them sent to my home it’d save me the trip.” 

“The kids must be keeping you right busy then?” the shopkeeper asked with a smile and Hermione couldnt help but to smile at the thought of her happy family as she nodded her agreement. 

Merlin couldn’t help but smile along with her, it was hard not to when in the presence of someone so warm and bright. 

“My apologies for keeping you waiting sir, I don’t think I caught your name-”

“I’m sorry I’m Martin Emerson, it’s nice to meet you!” Merlin said in a speedy jumble hoping to avoid any questions wherever he could help it, this life, this identity was so new and he was far more out of practice then he used to be. He had always considered himself a bit of a chameleon as he moved through the world but this time it felt like his usually silver tongue was nothing but a clucky piece of sheet metal in his mouth. 

The shop keeper to his credit didn’t seem suspicious of his delivery as he lifted his hand to shake Merlin’s but Hermione was watching him closely.  Merlin almost wished he’d asked Harry to stay with them but he couldn’t expect Harry to act as his buffer forever. 

“So how can I help you today? I overheard you mention you have a large order?” 

Merlin for his part felt uncomfortable even beginning to explain but his need to keep a complete collection of books outweighed his social discomfort. 

“Um well… you see I own… well I guess I should say I inherited a very large collection of books and I’d like to update them as I think- well I know the collections very much out of date-“ Merlin began to explain. 

“Oh well it’s no trouble! I mean there’s many old wizarding families that keep collections and if anyone can help I can. Tell me do you have any idea when it was last updated? Or is there a particular subject that the collection touches on?” Mr. Davies asked his mind spinning as he considered the potential size of his next sale. 

“Well um I suppose there’s many subjects but maybe we can start with a couple and work our way through it?” Merlin suggested. 

“Is there a budget we need to work within?”

“Nope I mean I don’t know if you can get the funds straight from Gringotts it’ll be too much to carry-“

“That’s no problem at all! We’ll need your magical signature but we can sort that out once we know what books you’ll need.”

“Yes I suppose that’s true well you see my collection dates to about 1810-“

“1810! And you want to update it to today?” Mr. Davies looked like he was about to faint at just the idea but Merlin laughed nervously. 

“I’m sure it’s not too much for you Mr. Davies I mean there’s not a single book I’ve needed that you haven’t been able to find!” Hermione jumped in hoping to save the shop keeper from his panic. 

The shopkeeper took a deep breath and nodded to himself. 

“The subjects you would like to cover?” He asked finally as he turned to the young man. 

“Um technically all of them? I mean we can start with medicine and history but I mean eventually I’d-“

“Mr. Emerson are you trying to tell me that you want a copy of every book written between now and 1810?!” The shop keepers voice was practically shrill as he finished the sentence and even Hermione felt her self become light headed at the thought. 

“Preferably… I mean if it’s too much-“

“No no absolutely not there’s no order that’s ever been too much for me I won’t start giving up now!” Mr. Davies face turned red at the perceived attack on his professional pride and Merlin found himself agreeing in the hopes of pacifying the man. 

“I have complete faith that if anyone can facilitate this it’s you sir!” Hermione joined in as the shopkeeper finally calmed. 

“Alright so you want a copy of all of the books written in the past 200 or so years. Now I know we have a record of all the books that have come and gone through this shop but that will take time to review and detail and then there’s the costs-“

“Martin do you want to start in 1810 or maybe we should start with the books already in the shop? I mean those would be best to start with and then maybe we can take some time to work backwards?” Hermione jumped in, happily taking the lead in this new pet project she was now adamant she would be a part of. Merlin smiled as his eyes met Hermione’s. Her passion was infectious and suddenly this didn’t feel as daunting as it had a moment ago. 

“That’s perfect I mean I’d like to take some books with me today if possible? I mean at-least a few so that I can read them-“

“You don’t plan on reading all of these do you?” The shopkeeper asked his eyes growing wider than should be possible for a wizard. 

“No no I’ll only read the interesting ones.” Merlin lied knowing full well he planed to read each and every single one eventually. He’d learned to stock pile his books ages ago, after all he had to do something the past few centuries. 

Hermione kept her mouth shut as she considered what he said and what she already knew about him. He wasn’t what she’d expected when Harry had initially come to her about Deaths request. If she hadn’t known she wouldn’t have thought him out of place. He seemed like a fine enough person. Not cold, not stubborn or anti social and very much just like any other wizard or witch she’d met. Except he wasn’t and she couldn’t wrap her head around how. There wasn’t a bone in her body that didn’t ache to solve this mystery and like everything else she set out to do in life that’s exactly what she planned to do. 

“Oh of course how about this I’ll go through and put a list together of the books we have and you can pick out a few to take with you and the rest we can sort through and have packaged to be sent to your home in batches. Where do you reside?” The shopkeeper asked feeling like he was finally on solid ground about this sale. 

“Um I’m not sure of the address. Hermione where does Harry live again?” He asked much to the horror of the shopkeeper. 

“Do you mean mister Potter?” He asked, the name garnering glances from the other customers. 

“Yes he does and just have everything sent to Grimmauld place please!” Hermione immediately jumped in before anyone can ask a further question. The shopkeeper nodded before jumping into his notebook and withdrawing their current list of inventory. Hermione happily reached for it and quickly pulled Merlin closer to review the list together. 

Merlin couldn’t help but to feel he’d said something wrong but Hermione just shook her head and glanced at the other customers. They were being watched far more closely than they had been earlier. 

“Sorry-“ Merlin began but Hermione just shook her head again. 

“You’ve done nothing wrong! Now let’s see, here are the books I recommend that you start out with. Let’s do a few general history textbooks, a few other history of magic books. There’s also a few books on new revelations and newly developed spells and potions-“

“Yes that’s perfect and if they’ve got anything new for herbology-“

“I just did a deep dive on the subject last summer and I loved these authors!” Hermione remembered quickly circling more on the list. Together they poured over the list and before long they had a short list of 40 books that they couldn’t possibly bare to cut down further. 

The shopkeeper looking down at the list and then back at the pair befor expelling an exhausted sigh. “Alright I’ll get them together but it’ll take me some time.”

“We can come back after dinner, let’s say in a couple of hours?” Hermione offered to which the shop keeper agreed. 

As they left the store Merlin felt like a weight lifted off his shoulders. He turned to Hermione and smiled. “Thank you for all of that. I honestly would have been lost in there without you.”

“Oh it’s no trouble at all! I mean I just love books but the boys get so bored of it all. It’s  nice to talk about them with someone else.” She offered shyly. Her entire life she’d felt out of place, she loved to read and to learn. Her mind was constantly in need of stimulation and more often then not everyone around her couldn’t understand why but Merlin just nodded along and agreed. 

“I honestly don’t understand why I mean there’s always more to learn and see and understand. And what’s better than getting lost in a good book?” He lamented. 

“Exactly! I can’t wait for you to read some of those books I’ve wanted to talk to someone about them for ages!” 

“You’ll have to tell me which ones so I can start with then!” Merlin agreed not even realizing that they’d already reached the restaurant. As they walked inside Ron waived them over. 

“Took you all long enough. Are there any books left in the store or did you try to purchase them all?” Ron heckled as they took their seats. Rose gleefully extending her arms as her mom pulled her into a hug.  

“Oh hush we only picked out 40 or so books for now.” Hermione nonchalantly replied as she took her seat next to her daughter and husband. 

“40? You’ve got to be joking!” Ron exclaimed as he looked between his wife and the sorcerer. 

“Just to start the rest will be delivered in batches.” Merlin added getting comfortable in his seat next to Harry. 

“Mate that’s mental.” Harry added as he eyed the dragon lord wearily. 

“Don’t worry I plan to pace myself.” He joked. 

“Or don’t, it’ll give us more to talk about!” Hermione antagonized only to be met with glares from both Harry and Ron.   

“No” “Terrible idea.” They both began causing Merlin to laugh. 

“So Martin when did you become a healer?” Hermione asked without paying the boys any mind. 

“You’re a healer?” Harry asked curiously. 

“Harry don’t tell me that you didn’t ask-“ 

“I can’t ask every question on earth ‘Mione” Harry interjected as Merlin tried not to chuckle. 

“To answer your question I grew up on a farm and moved to a bigger town during my late teens. I worked as a physicians assistant and a servant for many years. Magic was banned at the time so I learned in secret but my formal training was in medicine. Over the years I’ve always worked as a healer in some way or another.” Merlin explained as best he could without mentioning Camelot or Arthur. 

“So how’d you end up in Avalon?” Ron asked derailing his well laid out plan. 

“Well I… I’ve always known where it was. I came upon it early in my life and I would go back occasionally… It seemed like the best place to be on my own for a bit that’s all.” Merlin tried to say it with a smile but his eyes betrayed him. Harry smiled softly back at him when he caught his eye hoping to support him silently.

“Was there a reason-“ Ron began before yelping as he was smacked by Hermione and kicked under the table by Harry. “That hurts you know!” 

Merlin looked curiously between them all but Hermione waved off his concern. “Don’t mind Ron he lacks tact in situations like this.” 

“No no it’s alright. I mean it’s a fair question and I’ve sworn to Harry to be honest with him the least I can do is try my best to answer.” Merlin admitted. 

“See you’re hitting me without reason” Ron argued but Hermione marched forward. 

“If you don’t want to talk about it we won’t force you!” Hermione argued to which Ron and Harry agreed. 

“Thank-you that’s very kind. The truth is- I’m sorry I just- I think if I atleast say it out loud it’ll be easier. You see I … I had a son… He passed and I just needed a moment but the grief was more than I could bear.” Merlin finally admitted his eyes watering as he thought of him. 

“Em I’m so sorry-“ Harry said his hand reaching out and pulling Merlin into a hug. Ron quickly handed him a tissue. 

“Thank you. I’m sorry I know it’s been so long but it’s still hard.” He finally admitted as he used the tissue to dry his eyes. 

“Mar’in sad daddy?” Rose asked curiously as she tugged on Ron’s shirt hoping against all hope he would somehow make everything better. Merlin chuckled before reaching over and placing his hand on her head.

“It’s okay little one I’m alright! See?” He said with a smile to which she smiled and nodded in return. 

“Mate I’m so sorry I couldn’t imagine-“ Ron began before Merlin waved him off. 

“No such thing. I was lucky… He lived a long and happy life… that alone was enough.” He added his eyes distant as he remembered him. “His name was Leon. He’d been my god son but when his parents passed… he was only 2 at the time and I… It was impossible not to love him.” Merlin shared softly. It had been so long since he’d even said his name to another. 

Hermione reached across the table and placed her hand over Merlin’s in support. “I’m sure he would have been happy to see you finally coming out of your shell.” She added to which Merlin nodded. 

“He was so worried about me, he’d be furious if he knew what I had been doing these past years.” He admitted shamefully. His son had been as loyal and as kind as the man he’d named him after. He had promised him time and time again he’d be okay after his passing knowing that it was a lie each and every time he said it. But his son had always known.  

Harry’s gentle but firm touch on his arm had been what pulled him out of his thought spiral. “You’re losing yourself again.”

Merlin’s eyes locked with Harry’s and he nodded wiping the last of the tears from his eyes. “You’re right. I’ve mourned his passing and I know … he’d have wanted this. It’s just-“

“Impossible to forget?” Ron offered his own eyes glazed as he thought of his brother. Merlin nodded. 

“You don’t have to do this alone Martin. I mean if you’ll have us we can help you through it. You don’t have to be alone.” Hermione offered with a squeeze of his hand and Merlin smiled softly back at her. 

“You’re absolutely right. And maybe getting back into studying and healing would be good for me? I mean this is the longest I’ve gone without working on something or another.” He offered trying to bring them out of murkier waters. 

“I work at St. Mungo’s so I can help make a few introductions? See if they’ll let you sit for an interview or exam?” Hermione offered to which Merlin nodded. 

“That’s a hell of a goal to work towards but I think you’ve got the right idea. It would be good for me.” Merlin admitted. 

“Good man! And in the mean time we can get you better acclimated to the times. I reckon you’d get along well with our friends. We can go grab a pint once you’re up for it.” Ron joined in to which Harry quickly agreed. 

“Plus you promised to teach me some more magic! I’m a terrible student so that’ll keep you occupied.” Harry added to be met by a glare from Hermione. 

“Harry you can’t possibly be proud of that! Honestly Martin you’re a saint for even offering I was at my wits end with these two at Hogwarts.” Hermione complained as the boys locked eyes and smirked. 

“Hey we kept things interesting and you know it.” Ron poked back. 

“Did I hear someone say something about keeping things interesting?” George interjected appearing seemingly out of no where much to Roses immediate delight. 

He quickly pulled over a spare chair and sat down at the end of the table between Hermione and Merlin. Rose didn’t hesitate to crawl over her mum and into her uncles arms. George couldn’t help but squeeze her tight and kiss the top of her head as she giggled at the attention. 

“So tell me handsome how was your trip to the bookshop?” George asked with a smooth finesse that made Merlin blush and chuckle. 

“Quite enlightening actually turns out Hermione’s as big a book worm as I am!” He happily advised to which George rolled his eyes in over exaggeration. 

“Oh no what ever will we do with another one in our midst!” He pretended to wail causing Rose to giggle. 

Before Merlin even realized it he was losing himself to the conversations. George spent the evening making jokes and poking fun of everyone every chance that he could get. Harry and Ron were going tit for tat with him as Hermione and Merlin undermined every joke or point they could. It was like they were having their own battle of wit that the rest of the boys were quickly pulled in to. 

Before long their diners were eaten and Merlin couldn’t believe how quickly the meal had passed and yet he couldn’t get enough. 

It was the first time in centuries he truly felt like he belonged. 

As the night came to an end Harry and Merlin waved their friends goodbye and returned to the bookstore to collect the newest additions to Merlin’s collection. 

Harry couldn’t help but stare, his eyes wide as he saw the mountain of them. “When Hermione  said you could give her a run for her money I thought she was joking.” 

“What was it Hermione said earlier? Ah yes this is just a little light reading.” He joked as Harry began to laugh. 

The boys couldn’t help but to smile and laugh their whole way home.

Chapter Text

“Alright that’s enough it’s been two days and you haven’t left the house once?!” Harry shouted as he burst into the study and began opening all the curtains and windows to let the light finally come in. 

Merlin didn’t look up from his book. He’d made a nest for himself in a large arm chair tucked in the corner of the expansive study that Grimmuald place housed. Harry had admitted to barely using the space during his residence but Merlin was drawn to it and had loved it the moment he had laid eyes on it. The study was covered in dark oak bookshelves and high ceilings. The walls were painted with a rich navy that just accentuated the space into the study of a Victorian book lover's dreams. 

The problem was that now that Merlin had a hoard of books to keep him company he was unwilling to leave. 

Harry for his part had continued to drag Merlin to different places throughout his first  week. Day trips to muggle London, dinners in the evenings and the like but two days ago he’d gotten a call from head Auror Robards that he needed him on a few cases. 

As usual Harry had lost himself to the case and much to his horror he returned after a two day chase to find Merlin in the exact spot he’d left him in. 

“Merlin, are you even listening to me?” He asked as he opened the curtains in front of Merlin and the light caused him to groan but continue reading nonetheless.

Harry walked in front of the sorcerer and glared down for a moment waiting for a response. When he received none he finally made up his mind and slammed the book shut and pulled it from his hands. 

“Hey! I was reading that!” He shouted his hand reaching for the book but Harry quickly jumped back and held it out of arms range. Merlin didn't hesitate to throw his body weight against Harry in the hopes of strong-arming the book out of his hand. How he expected that to work when he was thin from years without physical activity and exercise was beyond Harry. Afterall the wizard was an Auror and in the fittest fighting form of his life. 

Needless to say the skirmish ended in Merlin panting and Harry smirking back at him, the book still triumphantly raised above his head for all to see. 

“Admit defeat?” Harry asked to which Merlin stuck his tongue out in mockery. 

Harry laughed and rolled his eyes before walking to his desk and leaning back against it, the book safe under hand as he looked Merlin up and down.

“Have you even had a shower? Or eaten?” He looked at the chair and noticed only a single tea cup half empty and ice cold. 

Merlin crossed his arms in annoyance and plopped himself down in the chair again, he was clearly pouting not that he was ever be willing to admit it. “It was a good book.” 

Harry shook his head, the smile still on his lips, this man was the strongest magic user to ever grace the earth and here he was throwing a full blown tantrum because Harry took his book from him. It was nothing short of ridiculous.

“And it’ll be here when we get back. Or have you forgotten we’re having dinner with the Weasley’s tonight?” He asked as he watched Merlin’s eyes widen. 

“That’s not till Sunday? Today’s Friday?” He asked, the horror dawning on him. 

Harry pinched the bridge of his nose as he could practically feel the headache coming on. “Merlin, I've been gone for two days! Do you mean to tell me you actually have not moved from this room once?”

Merlin swallowed as he looked around the room, only now noticing that Harry had opened the curtains and let the air into the room. “Umm …. maybe?”

“Didn’t you get hungry? Or get tired of sitting? Or maybe I don’t know, wonder why I haven't come back yet?” He asked curiously as Merlin automatically shook his head, his own mind unable to process how he’d accomplished such a feat. 

“I just… I’ve been on my own for so long I guess I stopped keeping track of things…” He offered a half hearted explanation. Harry just shook his head. 

“Well then you must be hungry? Or do dragon lords not feel hunger?” He asked out of honest curiosity. 

“We do… my magic has adapted to keeping my body alive even when … When I don't care for myself.” His explanation was purposely vague and Harry’s eyes narrowed as his mind caught onto the unsaid insinuation. 

“How does that even work? And is that even enough for you? I mean all creatures need to eat? For energy?” He couldn't help but to take a step back and take in Merlin’s appearance. He was thin, that was obvious but as his eyes zeroed in on his wrist he couldn't help but wonder if his reliance on his magic was the reason why.

“It gets the job done.” He answered as he stood up and stretched hoping Harry would drop the conversation. 

“So no, it’s not enough.” He answered back. When Merlin said nothing to argue against it he shook his head in exasperation. “Okay new house rule, I cook and you eat. Deal?” 

“You don’t need to do that for me Harry I-”

“Listen if that’s what this is about, I … I’m not just doing it for you okay. I spent years without having enough to eat so no one who lives in my house will go hungry. I won't allow it. And lucky for you I’m a great cook! I’ll cook and you’ll eat and we’ll both be happy.” Harry added, happy that he’d put his foot down but hoping he could avoid the topic of conversation. 

Merlin froze as the statement left his mouth. A part of him enraged at the idea that anyone could do something so cruel. “Who?” There was an edge of steel in his voice as he asked, his intentions were already deadly. 

Harry smiled softly and shook his head. “Don't worry about it. Let’s just get dressed, if we wait much longer we’ll run late.” 

He said as he led the way out the door, Merlin didn’t hesitate to follow him. The moment he caught up he pulled Harry by the arm to a stop. Harry sighed and turned back to him, planning to ask him to drop it but instead Merlin pulled him into a hug. 

“I’m sorry… I won’t go hungry anymore I promise.” he whispered hoping against all hope that he could take away the pain that had marred the boys face from the moment the topic had come up.  Harry nodded, hugging him  back tightly. 

“Thanks Em” He said with a smile as he pulled away. Merlin smiled back at him and silently promised himself he’d find who hurt the young wizard one day and make them regret it. 

___

“Harry dear there you are! Come in come in, is this your friend?” Molly asked with delight as she opened the door and ushered both boys in. 

Harry didn’t hesitate to reach for a hug. “It’s so good to see you Mrs. Weasley, this is my friend Martin!” 

Merlin quickly reached out his hand to shake hers. “It’s so nice to meet you ma’am, Harry’s told me so much about you all. I brought you a bottle of wine, I hope that’s alright.” He said quickly handing her the bottle. Molly smiled brightly back at him. 

“Oh you’re so polite! Isn’t that just a lovely gift please come on in. Arthur we have a guest!” She shouted pulling her husband in from the living room. 

“Oh Hello, Harry I see you’ve brought a friend?” Arthur greeted as he met Harry for a hug as well. 

“Mr. Weasley, this is Martin Emerson. He’s a good friend and I recently talked him into being my new flatmate.” Harry introduced catching both the parents off guard.  The Weasley elders shared a look before smiling at the boys. 

“Well that’s wonderful Harry I’m glad you’re finally admitting you need some company.” Arthur poked causing Harry to blush. He couldn’t count the number of times they had urged him to meet people, become more social, get a partner or a roommate. Hell they’d even tried to suggest he get a few pets when he’d been alone in Scotland because apparently the herd of deer who resided in the forests didn’t actually count as company.

“Well I don’t know if I’d go that far-”

“I completely agree and I couldn’t possibly leave him to his own company for a second longer.” Merlin interjected to the delight of Mrs. Weasley. 

“Oh I’m so glad to hear that! I hope our Harry doesn’t cause you too much trouble.” Molly fretted much to Merlins amusement and Harry’s horror.

“Hey I’m not the one who needs a keeper, he hasn’t eaten all day!” Harry punted, Molly gasped in horror and Merlin suddenly felt like he'd walked into a trap.

Before he even knew what was happening Mrs. Weasly was coaxing him into the kitchen and forcing him to have a snack that was larger than any snack Merlin had ever seen, while she and Harry jumped head first into preparing dinner. 

Ron laughed as he walked into the kitchen, and saw his mother lecturing Merlin while waving a wooden spoon in his direction and supervising as he completed every last bite. He readjusted Hugo on his hip as he pulled out a seat at the table and sat across from Merlin, his father taking the seat next to him. 

“I knew she’d feed you the second she got her eyes on you.” He joked as he reached over and stole a chip off of Merlins plate. 

“Ronald Weasley you let that boy eat, he’s skin and bones!” She shouted as Ron grimsed and apologized. 

Merlin laughed only for Molly to point her spoon back at his sandwich and he quickly picked it up and began eating once more. Behind him he could hear Harry snicker but he thought he better finish his plate before he  pick a fight with the boy lest he get another lecture.  

Hermione and George walked through the door a moment later with a shrieking Rose running behind them. 

“Martin oh I’m so glad to see you, have you been able to read The Modern Intricacies of Herbology yet?” The excitement in her voice was obvious as she quickly took the seat next to him, not even noticing that George was reaching for it. 

“Hey! It’s like you think about books and all of a sudden the rest of us are invisible!” George complained as he walked into the kitchen to kiss his mother and was immediately put to work in the kitchen. 

“It is good to see you again George!” Merlin exclaimed after finally finishing the first half of his sandwich. George smiled and reached over ruffling his hair gently before turning his attention back to his mothers instructions. “And yes Hermione, I did finish it and it was absolutely brilliant. I would have never considered creating localized environments to grow specific plants. I’m considering making myself a greenhouse to experiment with some of the books suggestions.”

“I felt the same way when I read the book. I tried growing a few in our backyard but I couldn’t get the balance of the soil and the temperature controlled quite right and it threw off all the plant’s constitutions.” Hermione jumped in.

“Tell him about the part where you cried for 4 days because ‘everything you touched kept dying’” Ron poked with air quotes and all only to be met with a seething glare and a smack upside the head from his father. 

“You really need to think things through son.” he said with an exasperated sigh as Hermione launched into a lecture about how he'd be the first to die if that was true. Merlin couldn’t help but to laugh as the young couple continued to bicker among themselves. 

“Dad, did you know Martin here’s a big fan of King Arthur and the old stories?” Ron said, hoping a change of topic would stop the current row he and Hermione were having. Hermione rolled her eyes but sat back proudly knowing that she’d won the argument. 

“Is that so! I’ve always been a huge fan myself. I grew up reading every book and story I could find, I was always partial to the stories about the knights, the legends of Sir Lancelot were always a favorite of mine.” Arthur began and Merlin couldn’t help but smile at the thought of his old friend. Harry turned around and checked on Merlin to make sure the mention hadn’t upset him. 

Instead Merlin nodded along and joined in “Oh I was a huge fan of Lancelot, but Gwaine was so entertaining, there are so many stories of him getting into trouble with one nobel woman or another.” His tone quickly putting Harry’s mind at ease. 

Arthur agreed wholeheartedly “Oh what I wouldn’t give to see the fights he would have gotten into, King Arthur seemed so nobel and just, I couldn’t imagine what they must have been like together.” 

Merlin laughed and agreed, his heart clenching at the thought of his own Arthur but Hugo’s piercing giggle pulled him from the thought. Rose was making faces at her brother and he seemed enraptured by his sister. 

“Dad I’m surprised the old king isn’t your favorite, I mean you’re named after him.” George offered as he walked over and placed more snacks on the table for everyone. 

“I suppose I must admit that the legend of him drawing Excalibur from the stone has always held a dear place in my heart.” Arthur expressed as he grabbed a chip. 

“Mine too.” Merlin admitted softly when the front door opened once again. 

“Mum I’m sorry I’m late!” Ginny shouted as she made her way to the kitchen, hugging and kissing each family member she saw. When she came to Merlin she stopped suddenly. “Oh hello you’re new!” She exclaimed as he stood up and extended a hand to her. 

“Martin Emerson, it’s nice to meet you!” 

“Ginerva Weasley, nice to meet you too! Are you Harry’s new boyfriend? It’s not cool to spring a new man on your ex you know?” Ginny shouted at Harry to which he rolled his eyes before cleaning up and walking over to her.

“He’s not my boyfriend, we're just friends and he’s my flat mate, more importantly you broke up with me because I wasn’t your cup of tea remember? Em this is Ginny.” He introduced as she pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek.

“By cup of tea he means men in general, so tell me Martin how come we haven’t met before? I thought I knew all of Harry’s friends.” She asked as she eyed the man in front of him closely and Merlin couldn’t help but wonder if he was being interogated.

“Oh um I’m not very social… Harry and I met in Scotland and I …he somehow convinced me to move to London but it’s only been about a week…” He tried to explain, his tongue felt tied as he laughed nervously. 

“And you jumped straight into living together?” She asked pointedly. 

“Ginny, that's rude.” Arthur interjected knowing immediately where his daughter was going with this. 

“What? It’s a fair question how many people do we all know that would give an arm and a leg to get close to Harry.” Ginny posited, Hermione and Ron shared a look but didn’t know what they could do to de-escalate this. 

“Unfortunately for you Gin you’re barking up the wrong tree. I trust Em.” Harry replied before Merlin got the chance. He knew his friends could be protective, he couldn’t hold it against them all things considered but he wouldn’t let that get projected onto Merlin. 

“Harry you’ve got to admit that you can be-”

“Naive, selfless, far too trusting for his own good?” Merlin finished much to Harry’s horror. “Oh come on you’ve got to admit it’s true. I understand why your friends worried about you.” He finished with a shrug. 

Harry’s palm connected with his forehead as he tried to wrap his thoughts around what they were saying. 

“For what it’s worth Gin I think he’s a stand up bloke.” Ron piped in as he moved around them all to swipe a sausage from behind his mothers back. He yelped as a spoon struck his hand the second he reached for the pan. 

“Well I’ll be keeping an eye on you-”

“Ginerva that’s enough you're being silly, Martin look at that plate, you've completely finished it off! You must be hungry, just you wait till dinner is ready” She said with a pleased sigh and took the plate. Merlin couldn’t help but blush at the attention. 

“Thank you, that's very kind.” he said softly, not used to receiving such kindness. 

“Martin, tell me do you have any family in London?” Arthur asked as he watched the boy closely, he racked his mind trying to think of anyone he’d met by the name Emerson. 

“No no I …it’s just me…My father passed when I was really young and my mum has passed on as well. We didn’t have much family so I’ve been on my own since then.” He admitted honestly, the thoughts of his mother making him smile sadly to himself. 

“Oh you poor dear” Molly added, reaching out to place her hand comfortingly on the boy's shoulder. 

“Oh no it’s been a long time, really I’m okay!” He offered hoping to avoid any pity. 

“Yeah and he’s not alone anymore so that helps!” Harry offered with a smirk that caused Merlin to roll his eyes. 

“Hey I was doing fine!”

“You got so caught up in your reading that you didn’t move for 2 days!” Harry shot back 

“Two days!?” Molly shouted in horror as Harry snickered at successfully throwing Merlin under the bus once again. Merlin was tempted to try and reach around and hit him but George beat him to it with a strategic poke to the neck that caused Harry to shriek. The savior of the wizarding world was also extremely ticklish. 

Molly huffed as she chastised both boys for fooling around and ordered them to get back to work. 

Merlin smiled as Molly proceeded to lecture the boys as they worked. George couldn’t help but to poke and prod until he was driving his mum up the wall while Harry tried  not to let the red head cause too much chaos. 

The rest of the kitchens occupants continued to chat and take turns helping with one task of another. Merlin offered to assist but he was shooed out of the kitchen at the mere suggestion. 

“Don’t pay them any mind they won’t let me set foot in the kitchen either.” Mr. Weasley joked making Merlin smile. 

“I think I know my way around a kitchen I’ve been cooking for years.” He offered but Ron just laughed. 

“You’re a guest mate, enjoy it while you can they’ll put you to work soon enough.” Ron offered before placing Hugo on his lap. 

“Here try to keep him occupied he’s a right ball of mischief if given the opportunity.” Ron warned before walking away and leaving Merlin to handle the squirming 1 year old. 

Merlin felt like he suddenly didn’t have enough arms to keep the child seated on his lap. The boy was like an octopus moving and twisting and turning in every direction in the hopes of getting out of his grip and getting under everyone’s feet. Merlin laughed as the boy began to huff in annoyance when he was unsuccessful. 

“You like to test your limits don’t you little one?” He asked softly as he tickled the boys stomach causing him to giggle. Hugo then reached up and grabbed Merlin’s ears in a vice grip. “Ouch ouch just cause they stick out doesn’t mean they should be used as handles!” He complained as he tried to pry the boys fingers open. When he finally succeeded the boy grabbed onto his hair instead and decided to climb the sorcerer like a tree. 

Rose giggled as she looked up at him. “He likes you!” She exclaimed before reaching up and also climbing on his lap. Merlin struggled to balance both kids but finally managed to pry Hugo off his head and put the boy on his knee next to his sister. 

“Will you make me another Rose Mar’in?” She asked sweetly as her brother tilted his head adorably at his sister. Merlin practically melted at the adorable little babies. His looked around an noticed everyone was otherwise occupied before closing his fists and this time he conjured a small bouquet of roses and an adorable plush dragon. Both children squealed and laughed reaching for their prizes. Rose immediately smelled her bouquet and thanked him again and again for the gifts before turning to her brother. 

“Hugo you have to say thank you!” She demanded but the baby just picked up the toy and immediately put its plush wing in his mouth and said some words in toddlers gibberish. 

“You’re very welcome Hugo and I’m glad you like them so much Rose. In my home I have a beautiful garden filled with roses and all different kinds of flowers.” He told her gently her eyes growing wide in wonder. 

“Can I see them?” She asked gently hoping her big puppy eyes would get her what she wants. 

“Well it’s very far away from here but maybe one day soon?” He offered to which she screamed in delight as she hugged him. 

“Looks like they have a new favourite.” 

Merlin turned in surprise to see another little boy looking back at him, his hair changing from bright purple to pink by the second. 

“Hello I’m Martin it’s nice to meet you?” He introduced but the boys eyes narrowed as he seemingly looked the man up and down. 

“Are you trying to marry my Harry?” He asked suddenly much to Merlin’s horror. 

“Pardon?” He asked only for Harry to appear seemingly out of no where and begin flailing like a bird shouting “It’s not like that Teddy!” At a mile a minute. 

Merlin laughed as Harry fell to his knees in front of the boy shaking his head and sputtering an introduction that left everyone within earshot snickering. 

“Honestly Harry you should have expected he’d have questions.” Andromeda added as she practically glided into the room. “I’m Andromeda dearest and what’s your name?” She asked, her eyes sparkling with amusement. 

“Martin ma’am” he offered his hand but she just nodded softly before reaching for his chin and tilting his head up so she could take in his features properly. 

“Harry you could do far worse he’s quite fetching. It’s too bad he’s not as blonde as my little nephew.” She teased making Harry sputter and blush unexpectedly. 

Merlin’s grin was downright evil as he turned back to Harry. “You mentioned having a thing for blondes is there a specific one I should know about?” He taunted only for Harry to shake his head emphatically. 

“Nope no clue haven’t the slightest idea what anyone could mean.” He rushed making Teddy laugh. 

“Harry’s blushing!” He shouted before running into the living room and chanting it at the top of his lungs. Rose quickly placed her bouquet on the table and ran after him to shout alongside him. 

“Teddy! Rose!” Harry shouted quickly running after his godchildren as quickly as he could. Hugo tried his best to chase after him but Andromeda simple picked up the boy and placed him on her hip. 

“Not today little one you’re far too naughty to let run around.” She scolded before pulling him close, he delighted in the hug and made himself comfortable in her arms, calming almost immediately. 

“You’re so good with him I was terrified he’d break free from me!” Merlin admitted, he’d raised a child of his own and even still he struggled to keep Hugo out of trouble. 

Andromeda smiled warmly at the boy and took a seat next to him. “Oh he’s not too much to handle. Teddys far more naughty, thankfully I had Harry to help me during the early years.” She admitted as she looked back to see Harry lifting the boy and spinning him around in his arms both laughing and shouting. Over the years she had felt less like Harry was just Teddys god father and more and more like he was her own son. She loved that boy and had helped him pick up the pieces after the war was done. She’d spent most of the last 9 years living with the boys in Scotland or forcing Harry to reside in her home with her and Teddy. The very idea of him living in the remnants of the Black family home had been unacceptable and she’d greatly enjoyed renovating the property with him when he agreed to return to London permanently. 

Seeing him now, without the weight of the world weighing on his shoulders made her feel like she’d done something right. She couldn’t help but want to protect the family she had created out of the destruction the war had left in its wake. 

She turned to Merlin, the boys eyes still trained on Hugo as he made funny faces to amuse the child. 

“Tell me young man how did you meet Harry?” 

Merlin smiled softly, the memory felt so much older than it really was and it was hard to imagine how quickly his life was changing. 

“A friend introduced us. She… I guess she was worried about me and told Harry I needed a helping hand. I didn’t expect that he would actually offer to help me…” he admitted his tone betraying that he still felt  slightly annoyed with the intervention. 

“That sounds like our Harry… he can’t help but to want to care for people.” Andromeda replied, both of them watching Harry from a distance as he chased the children in a game of tag as Molly shouted at them to watch out for the various decor around the home. 

“I didn’t think it was possible.” Merlin said in less then a whisper his eyes betraying his pain. 

“What was possible?” She asked curiously the boys response catching her off guard. She expected the boy to sing Harry’s praises or in some way betray his true intentions but instead she had seemed to hit a wound. 

“For someone to care enough to try and help me. I … I was a stranger to him.  He didn’t know a thing about me, not even my name and yet he was ready to move heaven and earth to help me. And no matter what I offer him in return he doesn’t seem to want it-“ he admitted in an avalanche of thoughts gushing out at the first chance. He couldn’t help but think about their discussion earlier and wonder how much Harry must have been through in life and how, despite all of it he could be so kind. 

“He just wants to help doesn’t he?” Andromeda asked and Merlin just nodded his head in defeat. 

“There’s not a thing I can do to thank him. I don’t know what I can offer him-“ Merlin admitted. 

“I don’t think he wants a thing from you dear.” Mollys voice took him by surprise, he hadn’t even heard her approach them. 

“What Harry needs, what Harry’s always needed was the love of a family. Thats not something that can be given or asked for.” Andromeda added as Molly nodded. 

“Shes right dear and if what you can give him is your friendship I know that’s enough.” Molly explained with a smile so warm it made Merlin’s eyes water. As he looked back at Harry he couldn’t help but to remember the pain in his eyes as he’d spoken earlier in the study. Merlin would have given just about anything to have protected him from that pain.  He nodded as he blinked the tears away and smiled at both the matriarchs. 

“I think I can do that.” He agreed and both women shared a look of pride, feeling accomplished in the fact that they’d properly vetted the young man. 

“So Martin do you have a romantic partner?” Andromeda asked curiously, clearly still digging for more information about the boy. 

“Oh no it’s just me! I’m quite content with just my books-“ he offered as a half hearted explanation unwilling to admit to avoiding romantic relationships every chance he got. 

“Oh well that won’t do at all, I’m sure we know of many lovely young ladies to set you up with!” Molly delighted in playing matchmaker every chance she got but Merlin just shook his head. 

“Oh no it’s alright I think I’m doing just fine for the time being.” He said hoping to dissuade the women but they weren’t so easy to give up. 

“Oh come now you can tell us I’m sure we know someone we could introduce you to. Unless of course you prefer a mans company instead because I’m sure that can be arranged.” Andromeda teased her eyes practically sparkling as she watched the boy closely. 

“My son Charlie’s a very good looking boy and he’s off working with dragons in Romania!” Molly offered her eyes lighting up at the prospect of setting her son up. 

“Absolutely not mum, you are not setting up the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen with my brother.” George happily intercepted much to Merlin’s relief. 

“George please come sit! Join us!” Merlin practically begged as he moved the seat next to him so George could plop down next to him as his mother huffed

“George don’t you start Martin’s seems to be a lovely boy-“

“So he’s too good for me? Is that it? My god and I thought you were my mother” George exclaimed as he pretended to collapse from heartache. “My own mother has forsaken me!” He wailed causing Merlin to laugh even harder. 

“Oh you’re an absolute menace!” His mom explained as she got up in a huff probably to tell his dad on him. 

Andromeda laughed at the boys antics before commenting. “Well if you ever change your mind come find me and I’m sure I can set you up with a lovely young witch or wizard.” 

“What about me? No one’s ever offered to help me before!” George complained only for Andromeda to roll her eyes. 

“That’s because you need to learn to help yourself first darling.” She replied before picking Hugo up in her arms and taking him to the living room. 

The moment she was gone both boys looked at each other and burst into laughter. 

“Honestly you handled that better than I thought you would!” George offered as he put his feet up on another chair and leaned back in his seat. 

“I’m just glad you saved me near the end I don’t know if I would have been able to myself.” Merlin admitted honestly, Molly and Andromeda made for a  lethal team when united. 

“Don’t worry about it. They mean well but they just think getting married and “settling down” is for everyone.” George offered with air quotes and all and Merlin chuckled. 

“I’m definitely not the settling down type I can assure you.” He laughed mostly to himself. 

“Have you never dated? Not even a little bit?” George asked curiously his eyes roaming the other mans features. 

“I have, but nothing lasts forever right?” He joked despite knowing he was the clear exception to the god forsaken rule. 

George nodded his eyes distant. 

“I’m sorry have I said something wrong?” Merlin quickly asked, the change in the redhead almost startling but the man just smiled and shook his head. 

“Don’t worry about it beautiful, you’re good.” He offered in reply the compliment causing Merlin to blush and sputter. If it were up to George that smile would be a permanent fixture on the boys face. “You know I meant what I said last week. You’re more than welcome to come visit the shop when you’ve got time, I wouldn’t mind the company.”   

Merlin smiled brightly back at him “Even if it’s just to sit quietly and read?” 

“Whatever you need beautiful.” He said again making Merlin smile even brighter. 

—— 

When Harry and Merlin returned from the burrow neither of them could stop talking about the dinner. The conversations that were had, the laughter and the jokes, the warmth of it all was so bright that it felt like they had taken a piece of it back with them.  

“And you were worried you wouldn’t fit in!” Harry joked as Merlin told him about playing wizards chess with Ron as George spurred them on. 

“Oh hush you abandoned me just in time for Molly and Andromeda to interrogate me about my love life.” Merlin complained as he collapsed on the couch. 

Harry laughed as he collapsed on the sofa opposite of him. “Better you than me, who’d they try and set you up with? It better not have been Malfoy!” He exclaimed causing Merlin to raise a brow. 

“Mollys son Charlie?  Is his name Malfoy or something?” Merlin asked only to watch Harry’s shoulders slump in what must be relief.

“He’s quite fit and loves dragons. Aren’t you a dragon maybe he can tame you next?” He offered cheekily only for Merlin to chuck a throw pillow at his head. 

“I’m a dragon lord not a dragon, though I suppose we are kin-“

“Perfect I’m sure he’d be happy to take you for a ride-“ Harry teased only to catch the throw pillow Merlin tossed in triumph. “Ha! Look at those reflexes!” He boasted only for Merlin’s eyes to narrow. 

“You are avoiding something aren’t you? What aren’t you telling me?” He asked cheekily as he moved over to Harry’s sofa and right into his personal space. 

“I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about.” He offered as he looked off into the distance like that would make him look less suspicious. 

“You are a terrible liar my friend now tell me!” He said as he grabbed a throw pillow and began to smack Harry with it. The boys roughhoused and laughed until Harry finally pled for mercy. 

“Fine fine, I’ll yield!” Harry shouted much to Merlin’s amusement. 

“Alright spill is this about that boy you mentioned Mal-something or another?” He asked knowing instantly that he’d hit the nail on the head when Harry cringed. 

“Malfoy and maybe? I don’t know it’s complicated alright?” He tried hoping to avoid the topic. 

“Complicated? I’m an immortal dragon lord waiting for the return of the once and future king. I reckon I can handle complicated.” He joked only to be met with a glare of annoyance. 

“Alright now you’re just gloating” Harry replied only to be smacked with a pillow again and again. “Okay okay! Honestly you’re a menace you know that?” 

“Just tell me! Is he fit? Is he married? Don’t tell me you’re star crossed lovers!?” Merlin hypothesized much to Harry’s annoyance. 

“Married? No absolutely not, why is that even your first guess?” 

“It happens?” Merlin offered with a shrug 

“Oh my god you mean it’s happen to you? You’ve been-“ 

“Involved in an affair yes and before you ask no it wasn’t Arthur and no I wasn’t aware that they was married at the time.” He immediately answered much to Harry’s delight. 

“Funny that you thought of King Arthur first-“ He really should have expected to be hit with the pillow that time. “Okay okay but we’re coming back to that!” 

“Doubt it, now tell me about the boy already! What’s his name again?” 

“Draco. Draco Malfoy, he’s Andromedas nephew.” Harry clarified and suddenly all the dots were connecting. 

“The one she was teasing you about? That’s brilliant! But I thought you said you were single?” 

“I am! We’re not- it’s not like that! We went to Hogwarts together and we spent the entire time at each other’s throats. We’ve literally tried to kill each other, we were on opposite sides of the war. It’s complicated okay just trust me.” Harry rambled much to Merlin’s surprise. His tone was heavy in frustration as he spoke, the weight of their past clearly bearing down on him in a way Merlin hated to see. 

“Harry can I ask you something?” He asked suddenly taking the boy who lived aback. 

“Yeah of course-“

“Is he alive?” Merlin immediately asked much to Harry’s shock. 

“Well yeah-“ 

“That won’t last forever. I don’t doubt that you have your reasons and I don’t mean to discount your history. But I know how it feels to lay a loved one to rest knowing that they died without ever knowing… without ever even having a chance-“ Merlin began. 

“Em … I-“

“Just trust me when I say I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I have… Love is worth taking a chance on.” He offered with a  soft smile. Harry nodded, he couldn’t help but to agree with him and in the grand scheme of things he knew that what Merlin said was true. 

“What if … what if he hates me?” Harry asked in nothing more than a whisper, his insecurities rearing their ugly head as his mind reminded him of all the reasons he wasn’t good enough. 

Merlin reached up and cupped Harry’s cheek in his hand as he forced those bright green eyes to meet his blue ones and smiled. “Then he’s an idiot because you are worth every single gold galleon I’ve got and then some.” 

Harry smiled back at him and nodded. 

“Thank you Merlin. And for what it’s worth I think anyone who lost out on the chance to have you in their lives is an even bigger idiot.” Harry said only for Merlin to hit him with a pillow right when he least expected it. Both boys burst into laughter, the sound echoing like wind chimes through the ancient house. 

Chapter Text

“Remind me again why I can’t just stay at home and read?” Merlin complained as Harry pushed him through the entrance of the Leaky Cauldron. 

Harry smirked as he led the way through the establishment, both boys garnering a few passing looks. Harry had practically hauled Merlin out of bed and forced him to get dressed in a tight fitting pair of trousers and a navy dress shirt that he’d demanded he’d unbutton to a length he was sure was far too low for polite company. Harry himself had dawned a fetching pair of black jeans he’d referred to as his “fuck me jeans” and a black dress shirt that showed off his medallion. Merlin had spent 20 minutes watching the boy struggle with his hair before finally giving up, running his fingers through it a few more times and accepting he’d just have to live with it looking like he’d just gotten done having a tumble in the sheets. 

Merlin was sure he was primping for some reason or another but the boy had been annoyingly tight lipped about their plans for the night. 

“Because you’ve spent the last 200 years sitting at home and reading you git. Now let’s go have a pint, I’ve spent the last week getting put through the mill and I reckon I deserve to blow off some steam.” Harry happily supplied as he waved over to the bar keep and found them a quiet table in the back where they wouldn’t be bothered. 

“We could drink at home?” Merlin complained only for Harry to roll his eyes. 

“You just want that cause you’re comfortable at home, consider this exposure therapy or whatever you were prattling on about the other day.” He gestured to the bar for 2 butter beers before turning his attention to the huffing dragon lord. 

“That and this is completely different-“ he began hoping he could sidetrack Harry with medical jargon. 

“Nope none of that I don’t want to hear a word. That requires the use of my brain which is out of commission until Monday at least!” He interjected almost immediately. 

Merlin rolled his eyes before finally looking around at his surrounding. The pub was as dark and dingy as usual but there were a fair few people seated and drinking, most completely unaware of the other patrons. There were a few people glancing in their direction but most just continued about their day without paying them any mind. As the butter beers were placed in front of them Harry didn’t hesitate to order an entire bottle of fire whisky much to Merlin’s surprise. 

“I didn’t take you for much of a drinker?” He asked with a laugh causing Harry’s eyes to practically sparkle with mischief. 

“You haven’t seen anything yet baby just you wait till the others get here. Tonight we’re getting trashed!” He advised with pride practically radiating off him. Merlin laughed and shook his head. 

“So I’m here to babysit then?” He teased. 

“Absolutely not that’s on George you are getting hammered with me. No exceptions!” He practically demanded causing Merlin to laugh. 

“Just what the world needs-“

“Forget the world this is just what we need! It’s time to let your hair down damn it!” Harry demanded once again before opening the fire whisky and pouring two shots. Merlin shook his head and laughed as he picked up the glass and rose them. “To a night just for us?” Harry offered as a toast. 

“To us!” Merlin agreed as they clanked the glasses and each drowned the shot. Merlin couldn’t remember the last time he’d indulged like this but the burn of the liquor down his throat was a welcome one all the same. 

“Okay so what do you want to talk about now that everything requiring brain power is off the table?” Merlin hazarded a guess as Harry refilled the glasses. 

“We talk you ass, it’s not that hard your mouth doesn’t seem to have an off switch so you must know how to have a conversation?” Harry teased and Merlin couldn’t help but to kick him under the table. “Ouch okay okay fine tell me something crazy I don’t know about you?” 

“Hmmm I suppose there’s quite a few … oh I’ve got one but let me just make sure we can’t be heard” His eyes flickered to gold as his magic worked around him. “Okay so I can talk to dragons” He offered and immediately Harry’s mouth dropped open. 

“How the fuck? The ones I’ve met don’t speak? I mean they growl and huff but nothing like speaking” 

“They used to … there used to be great dragons in the UK but their kind was eradicated and the dragons today are similar and as I am their kin I can understand them.” He offered as an explanation but it went over Harry’s head entirely. 

“That’s mental. Literally mental what else can you do?” He asked is awe of the sorcerer before him. 

“I can command them to do what I want?” He offered and Harry slammed his glass down on the table in shock. 

“No fucking way you just what say the magic words and they do your bidding?” 

Merlin cringed at the thought. “Technically yes but I wouldn’t do that I mean if there’s a problem I can just ask for their help.” 

Harry’s eyes softened as he watched Merlin fiddle with his cup. “Only you would feel bad  about using your abilities to force someone into doing something.” 

“Well if I don’t have to I won’t! I’m not a monster-“ he immediately began to which Harry rose his hands in surrender. 

“Never said you were I just think it’s sweet…You care and that’s not as common as you’d think.” Harry added his mind lost in thought as he remembered how many people he’d seen and met who’d do just about anything to manipulate him for their own gains. He gazed off in to the distance as he shook his head free of the thoughts. 

“You make me sound like a better man than I am. I’m not infallible… I’ve made more mistakes then I can count and I’ve don’t terrible things…” Merlin added, his mind still plagued by every wrong decision he’d ever made. 

“With the intention of helping someone or another I’m guessing?” Harry added as he turned back to look at Merlin, his eyes seeing right through him. 

“My intentions are irrelevant in the face of the results.” He explained, his grip on his glass tight as he refilled it and drowned his drink once more. The burn grounding him in a way that made him feel just a little more alive. 

“Yeah I know a thing or two about regrets. But if you think being powerful means you should be intelligent or all knowing or wise or some other shit then you’re out of your damn mind. I mean what’s the point of life if you can’t make some mistakes and learn a thing or two along the way?” Harry offered, his opinion clearly coloured by his experiences. A part of him needed to believe that there was a reason he had made the mistakes he had and lived the life he did. If for no other reason then for his own growth at least. 

“But what if there’s no reason for it all? I mean I’ve lived this long and I … I just don’t know what purpose I serve anymore.” Merlin admitted almost casually as he refilled both their drinks. Harry watched the sorcerer for a moment as he considered his next words. 

“Yeah I recon I understand. I mean after the war I didn’t know what to do with myself either. So much of my life was just trying to survive, trying to keep the people I loved safe then trying to win the war. When it was all said and done I … there was just me and a life I didn’t quite know how to live.” 

Merlin’s eyes widened as the feelings he’d held so near and dear were put on the table. Harry had hit the nail on the head, that’s exactly how he’d felt. For so long after Arthur had died he’d kept pushing forward in the hope that he’d return. Every hardship, every war, every time the world fell apart at the seams Merlin would hold out hope that it was his time. 

“My destiny … it had always been Arthur and I … I just keep waiting and I. It feels like I don’t even know what I’m waiting for anymore.” Merlin admitted his eyes tearing up but Harry just smiled sadly and nodded. 

“So do you think he’d be happy seeing you like this?” Harry hazarded a guess that shook Merlin completely out of his melancholy. 

“What? I … no I supposed I haven’t considered it…” he admitted his mind practically wishing he could supply himself with a memory of Arthur that would answer such a question. 

“Do you… I mean I know it’s been a long time but you said he was your friend. Would you want to see your friend this alone?” Harry asked cautiously, hoping against all hope Merlin would understand where he was going with this. 

“You think I should give myself the opportunity to enjoy my life?” The words felt bitter against his tongue. How could he when Arthur, his destiny, his purpose, the other half of his coin lay dead in the depths of Avalons lake.

“As your friend… I’d consider it the highest honour if you’d agree to atleast try to find contentment in your life for my sake.” Harry added as he took another sip of his drink. However, his eyes stayed on Merlin as he watched him mull over the proposition. 

“Why do I get the feeling this conversations been on your mind for some time?” Merlin asked his eyes sharp as they turned towards Harry. 

Harry shrugged as he drank a little more hoping against all hope that the liquid courage in his veins would make this an easier conversation to have. “Probably cause it is. I mean we’ve been living together for a month Em’ and unless I drag you out of the house kicking and screaming you just won’t. I mean don’t take this the wrong way but … it seems to me that you’re afraid to live…”
 

“That’s quite an astute observation.” Merlin admitted as he swirled the whiskey in his glass, his mind once again a millennium away where his heart had remained tucked away alongside Arthur. The day that Arthur died he felt like a piece of him had died right there with him and somewhere along the way he’d given up hoping that he’d ever truly feel alive again. 

“So you admit that I’m right?” Harry offered to which Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Alright maybe a little but if you’re hoping I’ll turn over a new leaf over night-“

“All I want is for you to try Em! Thats all I swear.” He immediately interjected his eyes practically pleading. Merlin sighed as his eyes locked onto Harry’s. Even he had to admit when he was beaten, the young wizard had a way of worming his way into Merlin’s heart. Over the past month Harry had gone above and beyond for him, every moment of weakness he’d had, every night where his thoughts turned against him Harry had been like a light shining brightly through the darkness. 

He had stayed by his side and asked, no demanded that the sorcerer share his burdens. Even he had to admit that the weight on his shoulders felt less pressing when Harry was there by his side. 

“Please Em’?” Harry practically begged and Merlin’s shoulders fell in surrender. He was fighting a losing game. 

“Okay fine I … I can atleast try. For you … for both of you.” 

Harry smiles so brightly back at him that it could have lit up the room. Merlin smiled and reached over his hand ruffling Harry’s hair as the boy huffed that he wasn’t a child but Merlin just laughed. 

“You’ll always be a kid to me.” He added to which Harry rolled his eyes and began to protest but was interrupted as someone called his name. 

“Seamus! Dean! About time you got here! Where are Ron and Neville?” Harry asked as he stood to hug his friends. 

“Ordering drinks though it seems you’ve gotten a head start on us?” Seamus joked as he eyed the bottle of fire whiskey. “You must be Martin? You my friend are getting absolutely wasted tonight!” 

Merlin’s eyes widened as he laughed unsure if they were conspiring against him or this was just some sort of right of passage. 

“Well I have quite a bit of practice holding my liquor so best of luck to you!” He offered as he shook his hand before turning to Dean and doing the same. 

“Well we’ll have to test that and I recon this will give us the best shot?” Dean added as he pulled out the days copy of Witches Weekly. 

“Bloody hell they’ve already written about him?” Ron exclaimed as he set down a three more glasses before pulling Merlin into a hug. “Mate it’s been too long you need to leave the house more.” 

“Beat you to it Ron and he’s promised to come out more often meaning now we get to hold him to it!” Harry happily advised as Seamus laughed.  

“First thing you should learn about Harry is that he’s stubborn to a fault.” Seamus counselled as he grabbed a nearby table and joined the two together so they can all sit down. 

“Okay I’ve gotten us another round! You haven’t started without me yet have you?” Neville asked as he came around and introduced himself to Merlin. “It’s nice to finally meet you Harry talks about you all the time.”

Merlin laughed as he got himself situated between Ron and Neville. His hand wrapped  tightly around his drink to ground him. “It’s nice to meet you all I hope I’m not putting you out by joining in.” 

All the boys immediately jumped down his throat trying to make him feel welcome and included, his eyes crinkled as he smiled in appreciation at their efforts. 

“So have they shown you the articles yet?” Neville asked excited to see the absolute horror on Harry’s face when he read it. 

“Not yet George threatened to turn me orange for a month if I read it before he got here.” 

“A threat I’m sure he plans to make good on. Where the hell is the bastard?” Seamus wondered aloud. 

Dean laughed as he waved in the distance, George was already walking towards them from the other side of the pub. 

“There you lot are, you best not have started without me!” He exclaimed as he pulled over a chair and made a place for himself between Neville and Dean. 

“What exactly is it that we’re starting?” Merlin hazarded and the boys around him practically grinned back at him in a way that was slightly unsettling. 

“Welcome to your first ever game of”  Seamus immediately began to give him a drum roll “fuck our lives’!” George exclaimed. 

“It’s a drinking game every time the press writes something about you that makes you cringe you take a shot. If you puke before we finish the article you’re buying the next 3 rounds.” Ron explained much to Merlin’s amusement. 

“How often do you all get written about that you have a set game for it?” Merlin asked causing the boys to laugh. 

“Clearly someone doesn’t keep up with the news.” Dean joked. 

“Yeah mate you can’t actually live with your head up your arse-“ Seamus began to joke. 

“You should take his word he’s actually tried to shove it all up there before!” Ron shot back causing Seamus to reach over and punch his arm. 

Merlin laughed as he took another sip of his drink. “Alright let’s hear it what’s the worst they could say about me?” 

George tapped the copy of the periodical on the table and cleared his throat like he was about to make a speech. He opened up to the centre fold and turned it around for all to see. 

“Is that pictures of us!?” Merlin exclaimed in shock as he leaned over to take a closer look. Sure enough there was a collage of pictures of both him and Harry in different locations in the wizarding world from throughout the month. 

“They’ve gotten good at taking the pictures without my noticing.” Harry grumbled as he shook his head. 

“This is from when we went to the apothecary the other day! And this one’s when we took Teddy for ice cream what the hell?!” Merlin couldn’t believe his eyes, talk about an invasion of privacy. 

“You’ll get used to it soon enough Martin.” Neville consoled as he patted Merlin on the back. 

“Alright time for the main event let us begin the reading!” George exclaimed with a grin. He waited a moment before he began to read. 

Dear readers,

It seems that a certain Mr. Harry Potter has finally returned to proper society after years of solitude in the cold wilderness of the Scottish highlands. 

“Alright that’s not so bad!” Merlin proclaimed thankful that it wasn’t as bad as the others seemed to be alluding. Harry grimaced as he took more of his drink. He knew it would likely only get worse from here. 

It is known amongst the Ministry that Mister Potter has recently begun to take on a greater role within the Auror department and has been more energetic than ever before. 

Could the reason for this sudden turn be caused by a new paramour. The young couple has been spotted all over Diagon Ally entirely lost in one another’s company. 

The young man who’s caught the eyes of the boy-who lived is a stranger to all. His name is believed to be Martin Emerson but his heritage is entirely unknown. It’s clear to those that have come across the young couple that they are madly in love with one another and both sport matching rings. Is this a sign that the famous wizard plans to settle down before long. 

Maybe wedding bells will soon be on the horizon. 

Both boys were taking shot after shot sentence by sentence as the article was read. As the last sentence was read Merlin simply grabbed the bottles and drowned the remaining couple of fingers of whisky without second thought. 

“This is sickening what we’re not allowed  to wear similar jewelry? They’re not wedding rings for goodness sake.” Merlin groaned as he smacked the bottle into the table while the friends laughed hysterically. 

“You haven’t read anything yet they go on to talk about the intricacies of your relationship!” Seamus advised and Harry’s face looked a little to green for comfort. 

“It’s Rita Skeeter isn’t it? She loves to obsess about my love life.” Harry demanded and Ron happily confirmed his suspicions. 

Trusted sources tell us that the two have even begun to reside together here in London. It’s clear that this mister Emerson is getting to enjoy living in the lap of luxury provided by mister Potter. The arrangement leads this author to wonder if the young couple enjoys an alternative relationship where one enjoys the company of the other while mister Emerson enjoys the comforts of pleasure offered by wealth. 

“They think I’m a harlot!?!” Merlin exclaimed both his hands slamming on the table in abject horror. In all his years he had never once been accused of such a thing. 

“Don’t worry this isn’t the first time they’ve said shit like this about Harry.” Neville  attempted to pacify as Ron simply waved down another bottle and refilled both their glasses. 

“I’m so sorry Em’ really I’ll call in a favour and put a stop to this-“

“No absolutely not. The hell you will! If they think this will get under my skin they don’t know who they’re messing with!” He argued, his words slightly slurring with the effects of the alcohol in his blood stream. 
 

“Ooooo you’re a feisty little thing aren’t you! I think I’m gonna like you!” Seamus jumped in with a rambunctious laugh. 

“Don’t pay the press any mind Martin they’ve accused me of trying to seduce Harry loads of times. I don’t think they even care that I’m straight!” Neville admitted with a tinge of frustration. “Every time I even try to chat up a girl it’s the first thing they ask me about.” He added with a sigh. 

“What about the article where they blasted Seamus and I for tor trying to add Harry to our relationship?” Dean reminded with a laugh, the idea he’d ever share Seamus with anyone was ridiculous. 

“Ugh don’t remind me, Hermione and I get those too. Remember when Hermione was pregnant and they said it could be Harry’s” Ron added causing Harry to cringe in disgust and inhale the rest of his drink. 

“How could we forget you had to drink double the shots on Hermione’s behalf!” George added, taking immense pleasure it riling up his brother. 

“That was your crockpot idea and I broke my wrist clean through cause of it!” Ron shouted back causing the other boys to laugh. 

“You’re the one that decided to collapse on the street cause you didn’t want to stand upright anymore!” George shouted back. 

“How can anyone after you’ve poured their weight in fire whisky down their throat!?” Ron demanded causing the boys to laugh harder. 

“All of a sudden I feel less bad about being called a harlot.” Merlin joked causing Neville and Seamus to laugh even harder. 

The boys carried on telling stories and poking fun of one another for hours on end and to their credit they kept their word and before long Merlin could feel the heavy fog of the alcohol weighing down on him. 

“So where to next?” Seamus demanded to which Ron violently shook his head. 

“No nope absolutely not I better get home before Hermione comes asking for me!” He jumped up quickly and grabbed his coat as he was met with a chorus of boos. “Oh stuff it we’ll do this again next week. And keep an eye on Martin he’s not a maniac like the rest of you!” He joked as he said his goodbyes. 

Merlin giggled as he stood to hug Ron tightly. Ron laughed and told him to take it easy the rest of the night but Merlin just continued to giggle. 

Before long the boys found themselves wandering towards Knockturn Ally. 

“I say we hit that new club next, what was it called again?” Seamus asked allowed, his gait wobbly. Dean laughed as he pulled his boyfriend in by the waist and helped him continue walking. 

“The three sisters I believe.” He happily surprised. 

“What type of a club is it?” Merlin asked much to Seamus’ surprise. 

“Jerez how far up you arse do you keep that head of yours? It’s a club? Disco? Dance hall? Ringing any bells?” He joked causing the other boys to laugh. 

“He’s from a small town Seamus they don’t exactly have a thriving clubbing scene.” Harry quickly interjected before Merlin accidentally told them something he shouldn’t. 

“Yeah I’m a simple farm boy you should be nicer to me!” Merlin exclaimed causing the boys to laugh. 

“Simple farm boy he says! Do all simple farm boys drink like fish in water?” George teased to which Merlin laughed. 

“Every single one that I’ve had the pleasure of meeting sure does.” He joked back. 

The moment they entered the club Merlin couldn’t believe what he was seeing, the bright lights, the blaring music, the beat seemed to echo through the entirety of the establishment. And then there was the dance floor with a sea of young witches and wizards dancing against each other without a millimetre of space between them. 

Merlin grabbed Harry and pulled him close to shout in his ear “Is this some type of bacchanalia ritual? This can’t be proper?!” 

Harry grinned as he tried not to laugh at the question. “Remember the sexual revolution I told you about? Yeah this is how we like to … express ourselves? Yeah let’s go with that!” He shouted across the pounding beat. Merlin couldn’t believe his eyes as he gazed in every direction his head feeling light as he took it all in. Around him men and women were all in different states of dress and undress, pulling each other close and grinding and swaying to the beat of the music. It was as overwhelming as it was hypnotic. 

His friends quickly led him into the building and up what seemed to be a private set of stairs leading to a balcony and a booth that looked over the entire club. 

Thankfully for Merlin the music wasn’t nearly as loud here as it was on the dance floor and he was finally able to have a little room to breath. 

“This is mental and people enjoy dancing like that?” He asked curiously to which Seamus happily laughed. 

“Don’t worry pretty boy I’ll take you on the dance floor and pop your cherry for you!” He joked as he slid into the booth next to him and caused Merlin to giggle once again. 

“I don’t even know what the means!” He complained to which George happily obliged and provided a detailed explanation much to Harry’s horror. 

George didn’t hesitate to slide into the booth on Merlin’s other side. He could see the wayward glances the young man was receiving and he couldn’t help but feel like he needed to protect his new friend in an environment he clearly wasn’t used to. 

He glanced at Harry to try and catch his eye and indicate his concern but the boys eyes were locked onto the dance floor. 

“Is that Draco down there? Who’s that man he’s dancing with?” Dean asked knowing he was stirring the pot. Harry looked murderous, his jaw clenched his eyes practically glowing with fury. Merlin shivered as he felt the crackle of his magic permeate the air. 

“Wait the Draco!? Where is he? I want to see him!” Merlin demanded as he turned over in his booth and all the boys looked down at the dance floor. 

“There’s the blonde git. See him back near that second bar he’s wearing that green vest! Damn that’s a cute little number it looks like it’s practically painted on! And with leather trousers too?” Seamus added, risking a glance at Harry and noticing that his arms were now crossed and his grip was growing tighter by the second. 

“I recognize that bloke I think he’s a reserve player for the Falcons.” George supplied only causing Harry to become even more angry. Merlin couldn’t believe his eyes he’d never once seen Harry lose his temper and here he was looking like he was currently contemplating murder. 

“You know he’s doing it to get under your skin mate.” Neville reminded the boy, knowing full well how badly things could go if Harry actually lost himself to his anger. 

Harry didn’t so much as glance away from the men for even a second. Draco was clearly flirting with the man, he was touching his shoulder, flicking his shoulder length hair, chewing on his lips, laughing at the bastards jokes as though they were the funniest thing he’d ever heard. His grey eyes flickered up to the balcony and caught Harry’s for less than a second and Harry was sure he puffed up his chest in pride. 

Neville was right he’d wanted Harry’s attention and now he had it. Harry’s control lasted until he saw the blasted man lay a hand on Draco’s waist and pull him close. If Draco wanted to flirt with every man in this place so be it but no one was allowed to touch what was his. Not even for a second. 

Harry turned around and began to make his way back down the stairs and onto the dance floor like a man possessed. His anger was practically radiating off of him and his magic coursed through the air, practically cutting through the thick of the clubs atmosphere. As he descended the stairs and walked through the dance floor everyone moved out of his way without so much as a word. No one would be stupid enough to mess with him when he was like this and he’d luckily gained a few inches of hight since the war so he was easy to spot and avoid.  

From the balcony his friends didn’t even try to camouflage their interest in what was about to happen. 

“Is he always like this? I mean none of you seem surprised?” Merlin asked as he looked at the others.

George simply laughed as he shook his head. “Harry’s downright obsessive when it comes to Malfoy. And it seems the older they get the crazier he is.” He joked, a bottle suddenly appeared in front of them and George quickly began handing out cups so that they could properly enjoy the show. 

“You should have seen them at Hogwarts I swear Harry spent more time watching Malfoy than actually studying.” Neville joked causing the boys to agree. 

“He’s damn possessive too, you remember when Draco dated that bloke from Drumstrang?” Dean recalled. 

“During our eighth year! Merlin’s beard that was terrifying we played a game against them for fun and Harry drilled the team so hard there was nearly a mutiny. He was ruthless in beating the whole lot of them.” Seamus recounted and Merlin’s eyes were wide as saucers at this idea. He knew Harry had feelings for the boy but every time the topic came up Harry would blush and sputter and look embarrassed. He’d assumed the boy had a crush on the blonde but this was more then a simple crush. 

“I was sure Malfoy was going to beat the shit out of him afterwards but he looked downright giddy watching Harry beat them. It was a little scary if I’m honest.” Neville added causing Merlin to laugh. 

“Oh so they’re both crazy? Lovely!” Merlin said as he turned his eyes back to the dance floor. Harry was approaching both men and Merlin actually gasped when Harry grabbed the Quidditch player by the wrist and ripped his hand away from the blonde before getting right up into the other man’s face. 

—-

Harry felt like all he could see was red. As he grew closer he could see that the man now had both hands on Draco’s waist and he was clearly trying to coax the blonde into snogging him. Draco’s eyes locked with his the second he appeared behind them. 

The boy who lived didn’t bother exchanging any formalities instead he grabbed the brown haired quidditch player by the wrist and ripped him away from the blonde. 

“Hey what the hell do you think your-“ the man shouted but Harry didn’t bother with replying. Instead he grabbed the man by his front collar and dragged him forward so that they were nose to nose. 

“Get out of my face before I get angry.” Harry’s voice was as cold as ice his very aura exuded a barely contained enraged fury. 

“Y-y-you’re Harry Potter!” He stuttered, even he could feel the raw power radiating off him and some part of his hindbrain knew he was in danger. 

“Glad you noticed now scram.” His voice was as low as it was deadly and the second he let go of the man’s shirt he scrambled to get as far away from the other man as fast as he could. 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing Potter?! I can dance with whoever the hell I want-“ Draco began but Harry simply grabbed him by the waist and pulled him close. His hand possessive splayed across the blondes lower back as he leaned to the boys ear. 

“You know damn well that no one gets to touch you. Not as long as I’m here Malfoy-“

“You sure you want to play that card Potter? You know your boy toys watching us as we speak don’t you!?” Draco glared as he flicked his hair back and pointedly glared up to where Merlin was grinning up on the balcony. 

Harry’s eyes glanced at the balcony before he returned to the furious storm grey of his long time rival. “So that’s what this is about? The witches weekly article?” 

“You move in with some random wizard and what I’m supposed to be happy about it? You listen here Potter I’m not some-“

Harry didn’t bother letting him finish instead he pulled him closer and placed his knee between the blondes legs and grinding into him. The blondes mouth opened as he groaned and Harry didn’t hesitate to reach down and kiss his way up the blondes neck and to his ear as the pure blooded wizard clutched his shoulders tightly. His body responding to the other wizard instinctively. 

“What you are is mine Draco. Mine and no one else’s. If you think there’s another person on earth I want more than you then you’re the idiot.” He whispered into his ear and he delighted as he practically shivered in his grasp. 

Draco pushed Harry back but clutched onto the front of his shirt, not allowing the boy to get too far from him. His eyes locking with bright green. “And I’m just supposed to believe you?” 

“He’s a friend, he needed my help and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Would it kill you to actually trust me?” Harry poked caused the boy to shoot him a withering glare. 

“If you’re lying-“

“When have you known me to lie Malfoy?” He shot right back. “I’ve got nothing to hide plus if I was lying you’d think he’d look less pleased about watching us entangled like this.”

Draco turned to look back at the balcony and true to his word there was Merlin grinning back down at him. The man even had the gall to wave from a distance at them both and Draco for some reason found himself waving back without even realizing what he was doing. 

He turned back to Harry and the idiot smiled back at him with the stupidest little grin and all of a sudden it was like every ounce of anger he’d felt bubbling within him seeped away. Harry looked sheepishly back at him and shrugged and Draco sighed as he shook his head at the idiot he clearly cared more for than he was ever willing to admit. “Alright fine but don’t think for a second I won’t find out if you ever so much as-“

“Drakey darling have you forgotten why exactly we came here today?!”

Both boys turned as they found an annoyed Pansy Parkinson glaring back at them both.  

“Pans I-“

“Save it I just got a fat promotion and I want to spend the night drinking with my friends not watching this nauseating game of will they won’t they that you two seem to enjoy far too much.” 

Draco to his credit looked slightly ashamed of himself but Harry just laughed as he reached out to hug Pansy and kiss her cheek. “Congratulations Parkinson, the ministry’s lucky to have you.” 

“Be sure to remember that once your minister and need to staff your executive offices!” She demanded to which Harry rolled his eyes. 

Harry turned back to Draco, his hand instinctively settling on his waist as he leaned down to whisper “I should let you go … for now at least.” He kissed his neck, just under his ear one last time before finally pulling away. He smiled at them both and made his way back to his friends feeling far more accomplished than he had any right to be. As he walked to the stairs he caught the eye of the quidditch player and didn’t hesitate to shoot him a glare. The man looked terrified and Harry considered his job well done.  

As he returned to his table he was met with a chorus of shouting as his friends immediately teased him. He just laughed and poured himself another drink before sitting down in the both where he had a clear line of sight to Draco. 

Merlin kicked him under the table pulling his attention back from casually watching the blonde. “So are you going to tell us what that was all about or am I going to have to guess?”

“He read the Witches Weekly article and was trying to get under my skin.” He explained with a casual shrug like anything about that interaction was normal. 

“I knew it! He’s always been the jealous type.” Neville piped up as Harry smiled and swirled the drink in his glass. 

“Oh my goddess you like it! You like making him jealous!” Merlin exclaimed with a giggle. 

“Clearly I’m not the only one.” Harry shrugged drinking the rest of his drink. “Now what did I miss while I was gone?” 

“Other then every wizard in this place undressing Martin with their eyes not much.” Seamus joked causing Merlin to look like he ate a cactus. 

“The hell they are! I do not attract that kind of attention-“

George snorted and Merlin turned to them in horror. “Oh come on I’ve had to glare away at least 4 different blokes. If I weren’t here they’d be all over you!” 

Merlin couldn’t possible accept that but Seamus grinned like a demon the second he fought against the proposition. 

“Let’s put it to the test then!” He said quickly standing and dragging Merlin up with him and onto the dance floor.  

Merlin had absolutely no idea what the hell he was doing. Seamus prompted him to move and sway with the music and the liquor in his system dulled his inhibitions enough to put embarrassment as far from his mind as possible. Seamus was downright filthy in the way he would wind and twist his waist and Merlin couldn’t help but envy his skill. The other boy pulled him close by the waist and exclaimed over the music “Feel how I move and try to keep up!” 

Before long Merlin couldn’t help but lose himself to the hypnotics of the beat, the sound of the music and the sway of his body as he tried to keep up with the rhythm. He was quickly understanding why everyone here seemed to be enjoying themselves. 

“Hey pretty boy look around, do you see the eyes on you?” Seamus joked turning the boy around and dancing against his back. Merlin’s eyes roamed the crowd and to his surprise Seamus was right, he was garnering more attention than he’d realized. He grinned, his confidence taking a boost as his eyes roamed over the different men and women watching him.

“Damn it I was hoping to prove you wrong!” Merlin exclaimed as he turned around to Seamus again. The boy laughed as they continued to enjoy their time dancing until they finally needed a break. 

As they returned to the balcony the collapsed next to their friends, the other boys quickly handed them glasses of water. 

“That was so much fun!” Merlin exclaimed as he got comfortable next to Harry. 

“And you wanted to stay home and read!” He exclaimed before both boys devolved into a fit of giggles. 

——- 

Later that night Merlin could barely keep himself upright no matter how hard he tried. Harry and George laughed at his antics as they led him through the doors of Grimmuald Place. As he fell against his bed he tried his best to thank them but he could barely say the words before devolving into another fit of giggles. 

George laughed as he spelled the boy clean and changed him into pyjamas with his magic. Harry pulled back the sorcerers blankets and helped the red head put Merlin in his bed. 

George ran his hands gently through the sorcerers hair in the hopes of getting him to settle. Much to his delight Merlin cuddled up into his bed and closed his eyes almost immediately. They whispered their goodnights to the sorcerer before leaving the room and Merlin fell asleep knowing he was safe and sound and taken care of. 

Chapter Text

As Harry walked through the ministry it felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. The week was nearing its end finally and the boy who lived could not wait to simply go home and sleep the exhaustion away. 

It was one of those weeks that just felt painful from beginning to end and even the relative win he’d had at work felt hollow in the face of the greater picture he found himself in. 

It was clear to anyone who knew him that he was taking his most recent case harder than others but no one could blame him for that. Even Robards was starting to get concerned for him and after the win today he’d told Harry to take the Friday off and come back refreshed for the next week. Coming from the drill sergeant  that was the Head Auror that statement said a lot. 

He wondered whether he should stop off on his way home and pick up some dinner but eventually decided against it. The idea of expending a morsel of energy more than he already had to was beyond comprehension. 

So instead he took the floo home with the intention of collapsing on the couch and possibly drinking himself into a coma. 

As he walked into his living room a heavenly scent hit him almost immediately. 

“Welcome home! I’m making stew, it should be ready in a bit and look I’ve even baked some bread!” Merlin’s excited voice exclaimed as he ran out of the kitchen to greet him. 

“You… you cooked me dinner?” Harry asked suddenly. Merlin quirked his head to the side adorably as he walked over to his roommate of close to three months. 

“Well yeah, you’ve been working yourself to the bone! I told you I know my way around a kitchen and I’ve put all sorts of stuff in the stew so it’ll be extra healthy and-“ 

Merlin was cut off by Harry pulling him into a tight hug suddenly, the shock caught him off guard at first but quickly he melted and pulled the boy into a fierce hug. 

“Hey it’s okay… you’re okay.” He whispered gently as he felt Harry tighten his hold and nod into his shoulder. The boy was clearly upset and there wasn’t a bone in Merlin’s body that didn’t want to find out the cause. But making sure Harry was okay was far more important than anything else. “Don’t worry what ever it is we’ll handle it-“ Merlin continued whispering assurances until the boy finally nodded and pulled away. 

“Sorry I just…it all was just a bit too much today” Harry finally admitted, his eyes looking everywhere but Merlin. 

Merlin reached out and took Harry’s wrist to lead him into the kitchen. “I don’t want to accidentally burn our supper but here come sit. Should I put on a cup of tea?” He asked gently as Harry collapsed at their table and began to pull loose his tie and unbutton the top of his shirt. 

“I’d rather a bottle of whisky if I’m honest.” Harry admitted as he rubbed his eyes and then ran a hand through his hair in frustration. 

“You’re not going to find peace of mind at the bottom of a bottle… but if you’re intent on trying I might as well join you.” Merlin admitted as he turned down the heat on his stew and magiced a spoon to stir for him. He pulled out two glasses and grabbed a bottle of wine instead of the whisky. “I reckon this’ll go better with our dinner.” He explained as Harry eyed the bottle. 

He shrugged and happily accepted the glass Merlin gave him and promptly inhaled its contents. Merlin raised an eyebrow but refilled his glass just the same. 

“How was the raid?” Merlin asked softly as he leaned against the kitchen counter opposite from the younger man. Harry’s general mood told him all he needed to know but this was unusual for the young wizard. Over the past few months Harry had been assigned a number of complex and high priority cases but not a single one had affected him like this one seemed to. 

Harry sighed as he ran another hand through his hair and took a long drink from his glass before finally putting the glass down and facing Merlin. 

“It went off without a hitch. They didn’t see us coming, we caught them by surprise, they didn’t even have a chance to destroy their goods and we were about to recover the “goods” they were exporting.” Harry’s use of finger quotes was curious never mind his frustration at the case going well. 

“Isn’t that a good thing? And when you say goods-“

“They were transporting children Em’.” 

It was like someone had knocked the air out of his lungs. Harry had told him that the crime ring he was chasing were prolific thieves who specialized in stollen goods for sale on the black market but this?!

“Thats sick! What do you mean they-“

“That was one of their exports. They kidnap children, mostly muggles from the foster system. They use memory charms on the adults and then kidnap the children to- to sell in the black market as slaves! I-I couldn’t believe my eyes Em! They were in cages fucking cages and we had no fucking idea!” Harry could feel himself shake as the anger overtook him, his glass shattered under the weight of his grip and yet he kept squeezing until the red of his blood mixed with the red of the wine soaking his hand. 

He didn’t even realize that the house seemed to tremor and shake under the weight of his rage, his magic lashing out without his conscious decision. Merlin’s eyes however remained on Harry and Harry alone. 

His eyes softened as he walked over the the young man, his hands reaching for his tight fist. He slowly forced him to open his palm and without saying a word he began to clean the glass from his hand before letting his magic scrub the shattered glass and spilled wine from the table. 

“Em’ I … if I had known I could have saved them sooner. I could have-“ 

Merlin shook his head gently as his magic washed over Harry’s hand, he watched as he wounds healed as though the skin had never been broken. “You did save them Harry. They’re safe and sound because of you-“

“No they’re not Em! You didn’t see them, you didn’t see how they were kept, how they must have been treated! If we hadn’t found them they-“ Merlin reached up and cupped his cheeks in his hands forcing the wizard to meet his eyes. 

“But you did find them. You made sure the raid happen without their captors ever realizing what was happening. If they had- if you’d have rushed they would all be dead or gone-“

Harry just began to shake his head violently unwilling to believe it and Merlin felt his eyes tear up. He pulled Harry into his arms and felt the younger man grip him tightly around his waist as he cried into his abdomen. Merlin held him tight as he continued to try and soothe the boy but to no avail. 

“Harry you did everything that you could-“

“It’s not enough Em! It’s not enough I- the look in their eyes when we found them-“ Harry began to sob suddenly and Merlin didn’t know what to do. All he could do was hold the boy close and not let go. 

“I knew that look Em’” Harry continued to sob. “They’d given up! They’d given up because they thought no one would ever come for them. No one would ever save them!” 

Merlin felt tears flood his eyes as he tried to hold Harry even tighter than he already was. He could feel the poor boys heart breaking and there was nothing he could do to stop it. 

“But you did, you found them,” he gently reminded but Harry just shook his head. 

“I … all I could think when I found them was- Gods Em when we found them we freed them but they wouldn’t even leave the cages! They weren’t scared, they weren’t happy. They’d just given up!” He exclaimed as he fisted Merlin’s shirt under his tight grip. 

“Oh Harry that’s … fuck-“ Merlin could barely speak, the idea of something so cruel, so evil it made him sick. 

“And I just- I knew. I knew their pain, they were so thin, their bones practically brittle, they were all bruised and hurt and in pain but they- they wouldn’t even cry because there was no point-“ 

Merlin wanted to find each and every one of those sick fuckers and watch each one die by his own hand. The cold fury that overtook him in that moment was staggering. 

“All I could think about, all of a sudden it was like I was back in that cupboard and I’d never left.” He practically whimpered as the weight of the memories hit him like a cannon ball. 

“Cupboard?” Merlin said out loud without ever having meant to. 

“That’s where they’d keep me. My uncle and aunt. I would beg and scream and cry for them to just open that door, to let me out to eat something to drink something, anything. The harder I cried the angrier they’d get and the more they’d hit me and I just- I gave up. I gave up because who the hell would have ever saved me-“ Harry sobbed until his whole body was shaking and Merlin’s blood ran cold as the dots connected in his mind. 

“I was just a kid, I didn’t understand- I thought I did something wrong. I thought I was a monster and I-I thought I deserved it.” 

“Harry no no you never- not even for a second did you deserve that! Not even for a second!” Merlin practically begged the boy to believe him but he just kept shaking his head and crying into his abdomen. Unwilling to let the sorcerer go as though he was his only life line. 

“When I freed them they told me they couldn’t go. That they’d find them again. That it was pointless. I had to beg them to leave with us but they- they just wouldn’t. They didn’t have a shred of hope left-“ 

Merlin couldn’t stop crying. The tears streamed down his face and he didn’t bother to dry them. Not if it meant letting go of Harry, not even for a second. He couldn’t let him go, he wouldn’t let him go. Not now not ever. 

“Listen to me Harry, you saved them. You found them and you saved them and we won’t let a thing, not a damn thing happen to them. You hear me?”

“Em they got away! The bastards escaped the second we raided them the only one we caught killed himself and the rest- they’re still out there-“ The house began to shake around them once again and Merlin clutched Harry as tightly as possible, unwilling to let him go. 

“We’ll find them. I swear we will and when we do they will suffer. I promise you Harry they will suffer.” Merlin swore. Finally Harry nodded his agreement and Merlin felt the relief loosen the tight coil in his chest. 

Slowly but surly he felt Harry finally calm as his nervous system regulated itself. Merlin held on to him as tightly as he could until he felt the boy finally stop shaking. 

“I’m sorry” Harry mumbled softly after a moment as he pulled away from Merlin, embarrassed at his sudden outburst. 

Merlin knelt down so that he was eye level with Harry, his hands cupping his cheeks gently as he wiped the tears from his face. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for. Not a damn thing you hear me-“

“But-“ he began to object but Merlin just shook his head. 

“Not a damn thing. You’re a good man and this- it’s horrific.” 

Harry nodded, as Merlin turned around to turn off the heat of the stove but Harry grabbed his wrist. “Don’t- don’t leave me-“ he begged softly and Merlin’s heart shattered instantly. With a wave of his hand the heat was off, the dinner safe under a stasis charm and he was sat next to Harry, his hand safely held between both of his own. 

“I’m not going anywhere Harry. Not even for a second.”

Harry nodded. He raised his hand and conjured another glass and used his magic to fill it with wine once again. 

“You’re getting better at wandless magic by the day.” Merlin noted and Harry’s lips quirked with the ghost of a smile. 

“I’ve got a pretty brilliant teacher.” He replied as he reached for the glass and took a sip. His other hand still holding Merlin’s and unwilling to let it go for even a second out of fear that if he did he’d lose himself to the darkness in his own mind. 

“You don’t say. I’ll be sure to remind you of that next time you complain about my lessons.” Merlin offered in the hopes of lightening the mood. 

“I won’t be complaining if you teach me how to massacre those sick fuckers in our next lesson.” Harrys voice was cold as ice, the comment was filled with unstated promises. 

“And deprive myself of the opportunity to do it with my own hands? Never.” 

Harry’s eyes locked with Merlin’s and in that moment there was an understanding that could not be shaken. 

“I don’t want to ask that of you-“

“I’d have done it anyway Harry. This … to use magic like this. I can’t allow it. I won’t.” Merlin’s eyes darkened as the magic that made up the fabric of his very being simmered beneath his flesh. He was magic itself and to use it for such horror was unimaginable to Merlin. It was nothing short of sinful and the criminals would pay. 

“That shouldn’t put my mind at ease the way it does.” Harry replied as he collapsed against the back of his seat, exhausted after the havoc his emotions had reaped on his mind and body. 

Merlin smiled softly and nodded but unfortunately this was the way of the world and this was hardly the first instance of Merlin’s involvement in enacting this type of justice. 

“When you’ve caught wind of them you’ll tell me and I’ll take it from there. The world will be better off without such evil.” Merlin added darkly. 

“What will you do to them when you find them?” Harry asked, his eyes sharp as he watched Merlin but the sorcerer just shrugged noncommittally. 

“No fucking clue. I’ll be careful if thats what you’re worried about, I’ve got more than enough ways to ensure that this doesn’t come back to us.” Merlin admitted to which Harry scoffed. 

“I don’t doubt that for a second. I’d just liked to see the bastards ripped to fucking shreds.” His own voice heavy with rage but Merlin just nodded his agreement. 

“That can be arranged.” Merlin offered and Harry wondered for the hundredth time how fucked up he himself must be for such a statement to put him at ease the way that it did. He was taken out of his thought by Merlin reaching up to cup his cheek once more. 

“Harry I … I will never let anyone hurt you. Not for a second. Not for a moment. Never again. I swear to you so long there is life in my body I will protect you-“ 

Harry felt his eyes water as he launched himself into the sorcerers arms for another hug. He’d spent his entire childhood imagining, wishing that someone somewhere would say that to him. Would offer to save him, to protect him, to love him. In that moment he knew without a shadow of a doubt that Merlin meant every single word and while he may not be a kid anymore he couldn’t help but be thankful. 

Merlin held him tightly as he assured him over and over again that no one would ever be allowed to hurt him again and Harry finally let himself believe it. 

When he pulled back Merlin stood up and reached up to kiss the boys temple gently. 

“Why don’t you go take a shower and I’ll fix us both a plate. We can eat and watch some telly?” He offered to which Harry nodded in agreement. 

“Can we watch some more of Good Omens?” He asked softly to which Merlin smiled brightly. 

“What ever you want” he assured him and Harry nodded, his shoulder finally feeling lighter than they had in ages. 

——

Later that night the boys lay sprawled out on the couch. Harry had placed a pillow on Merlin’s lap and had laid his head down against it so Merlin could run his fingers through his unruly hair, the touch a constant reminder that he wasn’t alone. 

Suddenly Harry paused the episode and lifted his head to lock eyes with Merlin. 

“You’re not going to hunt down my uncle and aunt are you?” He asked suddenly much to Merlin’s shock and amusement. 

“Do you want me to?” His voice was even as he asked the question as though he was asking for permission. 

“No. God no I - I’d be no better than them if I did I-“ Harry began his mind flooded with images not of the Dursley’s but of Voldemort and the monster he became. 

It was the cool touch of Merlin’s hand on his head that pulled him from his thoughts. “I promised you I wouldn’t let a thing in this world hurt you. And I meant that. I won’t let anyone hurt you, not even my own recklessness.”  

Harry’s eyes widened as he nodded his understanding. Merlin smiled softly and pulled Harry to lie down once again. 

“Em?” Harry whispered softly. 

“Yeah?” He asked curiously. 

“Thank-you.” Harry whispered but Merlin just smiled and patted his head gently. 

“I…I’ve never had a brother Harry but… I’d like to think that this is what brothers would do.” He admitted almost shyly and Harry felt a smile take over his face as he turned to look up at the all powerful sorcerer. 

“Just my luck I’ve gotten myself the most annoying one around!” He joked to which Merlin grabbed him by the ear tugging until he plead for mercy. Both boys laughed before turning back to the tv and watching the rest of the show. 

“For what it’s worth… I think I’m the lucky one.” Merlin admitted softly. 

“We can argue about that later.” Harry replied to which Merlin smiled as he ruffled the boys hair before returning to the silence of the night. 

—- Months Later —-

It was a warm Monday morning when Ron and Harry were summoned to the Head Aurors office on an urgent matter. Both of the men shared a look of apprehension, for once completely unaware of what they could have done to be called into their bosses office like this. 

Much to their surprise the second they entered Robards demanded that they hurry up and join him to take a Portkey to Slovenia.

Within moment they were transported to a beautiful mountain valley that would have been breathtaking save and except the herd of dragons that seemed to be flying on the horizon. 

“Bloody hell what are we doing here?!” Ron practically shouted, the sight of the dragons putting him on edge for obvious reasons. 

“We’re here to collect the traffickers you’ve been chasing.” Robards advised as he flagged down a near by Slovenian Auror. 

Quickly they were led up a hill, the Aurors raised their wands at the ready but the Slovenian Aurors just laughed. 

“They’re in no condition to put up a fight.” He joked grimly and it was once they reached the top of the hill that Harry finally understood why. 

All three men gasped at the sight before their eyes. The wizards they were chasing were there alright, or what was left of them anyways. 

“They’ve- they’ve been ripped to shreds!” Ron shouted his eyes taking in the bloody scene around him. 

“The dragons- it’s curious they’re wild in these parts but not once in our history have they done something like this.” The Slovenian auror advised, his hands raking through his hair as he tried to wrap his head around what he was seeing. 

Harry did his best to keep only the shock painted across his face as he watched the wizards theorize what could have possibly led the dragons to do something like this. 

“Maybe they were hoping to poach them?” Harry supplied, the answer being generally accepted given that there was no other possible explanation for why the dragons would destroy the wizards in question. 

There was no magic known to wizarding kind that would allow a wizard to control a dragon. At least not one that the Aurors in front of him were aware of. 

Harry didn’t know whether to be disturbed or impressed by Merlin’s brilliance. As his mind took him back to the horrors he’d seen during that now infamous raid he couldn’t help but think that justice had finally been served. 

Chapter Text

Merlin smiled to himself as he diligently watched over his newest potion with intense fascination. He had recently been inspired by Hermione to pick up a few books on the recent developments in potion making and now that he’d read up on the subject he was adamant about trying his hand at a few of the potions he’d read about. 

Harry had been less than impressed when he asked to transform the spare room next to the study into a potions lab but he could never say no to the sorcerer.  Speaking of the wizard, he should have been home ages ago. Just as he thought about sending a patronus to the younger man the fireplace in his lab lit up with a fire call. 

“Martin! Martin are you there!?” Ron called out, his voice edged with concern that caused Merlin’s heart to race. 

“Ron is everything alright? What’s going on?”

“It’s Harry, he’s at St. Mungo’s! He went after a lead on the wizards we’ve been chasing and he got hit with something. He was conscious when he left but can you go to him? I’d tell Hermione but she’s got the kids and she’d freak out-“ Ron rambled at top speeds as though he were the one being chased. 

“Ron! It’s alright I’ll go! I’ll take care of him!” Merlin quickly assured. He watched Ron’s face twist as though someone was calling to him. “It’s alright go on, I’ll take care of Harry!” 

Ron nodded before ending the call quickly. 

Within minutes Merlin had instructed Kreacher to keep an eye on his potion and he was ready and walking through the floo and entering St. Mungo’s. His heart beat was thumping erratically in his chest as he hurried into the building and all but ran up to the reception and demanded to know where Harry was. 

“Young man I am not going to fall for that I don’t know who you work for but I will not tell you about Mr. Potters whereabouts.” The older medical assistant practically shouted at him. Merlin couldn’t believe his ears, now was not the time for this. 

“Listen Ma’am I’m Harry’s friend! We live together for goddess sake now let me see him or so help me I’ll-“ 

“Alright that’s enough!” A young healer suddenly interrupted causing everyone in the vicinity to turn. 

“You’re Draco-“ Merlin began but the blond simply waved off his concerns. 

“Margret take him to see Potter and tell him I’ll be there in a moment. I have to stop by another patient first.” He quickly instructed, his tone harsh and pointed in a way that made the older witch huff. Draco paid it no mind he gave Merlin barely a glance before turning on his heel and marching down the hall, his healers robes billowing behind him dramatically. 

“Well what are you waiting for then?” She demanded and Merlin didn’t waste a second following after her. 

As he was led through the halls he noticed that this area of the hospital was clearly blocked off from the rest of the facilities and Merlin began to fear the worst. The second the hospital rooms door opened and he saw Harry look up at him, his regular goofy grin plastered on his face, Merlin felt a wave of relief wash over him that was so strong he thought his knees might buckle. 

“Em what are you doing here?” His voice was raspy and strained as Merlin quickly made his way to his bed and reached for his cheek. 

Harry shivered as he felt Merlin’s magic wash over him assessing his injuries. 

“Em you don’t have to I feel fine. I got hit with something or another but it’s nothing I can’t handle.” Harry tried to assure him as his hand covered Merlin’s and pulled it from his cheek. The sorcerer hadn’t even realized he was shaking with the adrenaline coursing through his veins. 

Merlin didn’t believe a word out of the wizards mouth but collapsed in the chair by his bedside all the same. His hands running through his hair as he got ahold of himself. 

“What the hell happen exactly? Cause you’re not alright at all you’ve got broken bones and bruising and you’ve clearly been hit with a curse-“

“Em I’m fine it’s nothing that can’t be healed right?” He tried to assure while forcing his body to sit up only to feel pain spark in his chest. 

“Here let me heal you-“ 

“I don’t know what you think you’re doing but if you so much as lift a wand to my patient I’ll break it to pieces.” Draco’s voice echoed through the small room causing both the black haired men to jump. 

“Malfoy what are you doing here? Aren’t you meant to be off-“ Harry began his eyes raking over the blonde. 

Draco froze momentarily, his glare pinning Harry in place almost immediately. “How do you know when I’m off?”

Harry had the great sense to look extremely embarrassed as Merlin’s gaze moved between the boys second by second. 

“How do you know his schedule?” Merlin asked curiously his face squinted in confusion. Harry blushed bright red as both the men stared at him, waiting for an answer. 

“Hermione mentioned they had the same shifts that’s all! Will you stop looking at me like that for Circes sake!” He defended but Draco looked less than convinced as he rolled his eyes and made his way to Harry’s bedside. He didn’t waste a second as he ran one diagnostic spell after another, a quill and parchment following him everywhere he went and transcribing his findings. 

“It seems that you were hit with a curse that’s causing your physiological functions to slow- “

“I believe it’s a frost freeze spell, it will need to be cured with a heating potion preferably one with some bitterroot.” Merlin offered causing Draco to freeze and turn his attention towards him. 

“You’re a healer.” Draco announced without much fanfare before waiting for a response. His sharp eyes trained on this wizard he had never met. 

“Afraid so.” Merlin replied with a shrug and a smile. Draco bristled momentarily, every bone in his body wanting to lash out but Harry’s eyes caught his before he could do so. One look at Harry’s big green eyes looking back at him had his icy resolve melting. 

“Play nice?” Harry asked softly and Draco couldn’t help but to roll his eyes at the reckless moron. 

“I always play nice. I’ll send a memo out for the potion.” He shot back his quill quickly jotting down the list of potions and elixirs that he rattled off without second thought before turning back to Harry. “So where did you find him?” He asked as he glanced at Merlin. 

Merlin for his part didn’t know whether he should be surprised, impressed or entertained. The two young men were practically speaking in monologue through their eyes alone and the room felt thick with tension. 

“We met in Scotland actually-“ Merlin began but Draco’s glare cut him off almost immediately. Instead he whipped his head in Harry’s direction waiting for an explanation from him instead. 

The green eyed boy smiled brightly up at him his eyes practically twinkling with mischief even when he should have been doubled over in pain. “You wouldn’t believe me even if I told you.” 

Draco stopped for a moment his eyes fixed on Harry before glancing at Merlin. The sorcerer smiled and shrugged, his easy going aura telling him that he wasn’t going to get a straight answer out of either of the men. He sighed and rolled his eyes almost affectionately before turning back to Harry. 

“You know what I’d rather not know what types of trouble you get yourself into. Now sit still while I heal your injuries.” Draco scolded, not bothering to wait for Harry to stop fidgeting and simply grabbing him by the chin and forcing him to sit back against the bed as he began his work. 

Merlin spent the next hour watching Draco shift and move and adjust Harry as he saw fit without so much as asking the boys  opinion on the matter. Not that Harry didn’t complain, there wasn’t a second that he wasn’t complaining or prattling on in the hopes of getting Draco riled up. 

Draco for his part was going toe to toe with the auror, giving as good as he got while still flawlessly executing his spell work. Merlin didn’t know whether to be impressed or question their sanity. The two of them were so wrapped up in each other it was like they’d completely forgotten that he was even there. 

“Healer Malfoy I have the potions that you’ve requested!” Shouted the meek voice of an assistant healer who looked like he should still be taking up residence at Hogwarts. The young man was of slight build with brown hair and eyes that were practically locked on Harry as though he couldn’t believe the man was actually standing there in front of him. 

“Ah Burton perfect timing, Potter there’s seven potions you’ll need to-“ Draco began. 

“Seven? Malfoy come off it, you know I don’t need all that-“ Harry protested causing the assistant healer to brace himself like he was about to be attacked. 

“Harry if they’re necessary then you have to-“ Merlin began to lecture. 

“I suppose we can do without a couple-“ Burton mumbled to himself as though he was afraid to raise his voice. 

“No! Absolutely not!” Draco began his face a sneer as he turned to glare at his assistant. “He needs to take each and every one no exceptions. I don’t care who he is he’s my patient and that’s that.” He lectured before grabbing the first bottle and marching to Harry’s side. Harry began to roll his eyes but Draco, having lost his temper grabbed Harry by the jaw and forced Harry to meet his eyes. 

“You will drink each and every one of these potions and then maybe the next time you’re about to do something stupidly reckless you’ll actually stop to think about the consequences of your actions before you get your self beaten up!” He practically seethed. 

Harry froze for a moment, his eyes wide and locked on Draco’s before he sighed and grasped the bottle and uncorked it without further complaint. He lifted it up as though he was taking a drink in Draco’s honour before mumbling “As you wish” and inhaling its contents without complaint.  

Merlin could only sit back and gawk, his mouth open in shock as he watched the display. All he could think was that he couldn’t believe what he was witnessing. He looked towards the assistant healer and the poor boy looked like he was about to faint. 

One after another Harry drank every potion and elixir without so much as a peep. His displeasure only coming through as he cringed and shuddered after each and every one. 

As he finished the last bottle he wiped the back of his hand across his lips as he tried to rid himself of the disgusting taste. 

“Learned your lesson?” Draco asked almost casually, his arms crossed as he watched Harry with a look of contentment. He was clearly quite proud of himself. 

“I think you could find better ways to punish me than this Draco.” Harry said with an award winning smirk that caused the blonde to blush scarlet almost instantly. Harry knew full well how to get under Draco’s skin and the use of his name in that deep sultry voice might as well have been a love spell for the blonde. 

Merlin had to cover his mouth to stop himself from gasping but the poor assistant didn’t have nearly as much sense. 

“Burton don’t you have other work to be doing?!” Draco demanded causing the boy to jump at attention and practically run from the room. 

“Yes sir sorry sir!” He exclaimed as he made a quick getaway. 

“Now that wasn’t very nice” Harry noted his eyes practically twinkling as he took in the blonde. His eyes roaming his figure shamelessly as though he was entirely helpless and unable to stop himself.  

Merlin wasn’t sure if he should leave or just sit back and watch the show. 

“When have you ever known me to be nice scar-head.” The old nickname sounded flat at best, there was no heat in the insult but  the joy on Harry’s face made it seem less like he’d been insulted and more like the blonde had just confessed his undying love or something. 

As Draco returned to finishing up his healing spells Merlin couldn’t help but notice that Harry looked nothing short of entranced. He watched every move the blonde made, hung off every word he said. He looked like a mooning lovesick fool and Merlin couldn’t help but think he reminded him of young puppy. 

When Draco finished up his work his eyes turned back to Harry and for the first time since he stepped foot in the room he let the tension fall from his shoulders. 

“Alright that’s all of it. I’ll need to monitor you for a few hours to make sure the potions are working correctly and then maybe I’ll consider discharging you.” Draco was nothing short of professional but Merlin could practically feel the relief radiating off the boy now that Harry was treated. 

Harry smiled back at the blonde like he had hung the moon in the night sky. “Thank you, I hope I didn’t cause you too much trouble?” 

Draco rolled his eyes before pinning Harry with a glare that lacked any real heat. “You’d cause me less trouble if you didn’t end up in here with an injury monthly like bloody clockwork. Honestly Potter I know you like to play the hero but for once can you at least try to think before you act?” He demanded, his ire hot and furious now that he was sure Harry was going to be alright. 

“And lose out on the opportunity to see my favourite heeler? I would never-“ Harry shot back causing Merlin to chuckle. 

Both heads turned to him suddenly as though they’d truly forgotten he was in the room. Merlin’s eyes widened as he watched the wizards both blush and sputter in embarrassment at being caught doing what ever it was that they were doing. 

“Sorry please don’t stop on my account this is quite entertaining to watch!” Merlin happily explained causing the boys to be become even more embarrassed. 

“Em come on-“ Harry pleaded causing the sorcerer to chuckle softly. 

“Em? Is that some sort of nick name? That must have been your idea Potter, it clearly lacks any elegance.” Draco teased trying to find firmer ground as he finished up his notes and cleared away the rest of his materials and tools. 

“Jealous?” Harry teased causing Draco to glare again. 

“Are you telling me I have reason to be?” He shot back. 

“Obviously not.” Harry confirmed making Merlin chuckle once again. Both sets of eyes locked on him once again. 

“What it’s true, he’s definitely not my type!” Merlin confirmed his hands raised in surrender. 

Draco looked Merlin up and down a couple of times before nodding. “I suppose that’s acceptable, after all you could do far better.” 

Merlin smiled brightly as Harry began to complain. Draco rolled his eyes as Harry huffed and puffed at the comment before finally taking his leave. “Do try to keep your idiocy in check until I discharge you.” He warned before strutting out of the room, billowing robes and all. 

Harry and Merlin both sat in silence for a moment, their eyes still trained on the back of the door. Merlin shook himself out of it and turned to Harry, his grin practically feral as it locked on the boy. 

Harry rolled his eyes and sat back in his bed before turning to lock eyes with Merlin. 

“Well?” Merlin asked waiting for an expectation. 

“I have no idea what you’re taking about” Harry offered hoping against all hope that Merlin would drop it. 

“My ass! What was all that? I mean talk about sexual tension!” He exclaimed both his brows practically plastered to his hair line. 

“It’s not that big of a deal-“ Harry bristled to which Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Oh please not a big deal he says. Bullocks. You’re clearly in love with the man I mean first the club now this?”  Merlin asked, not even bothering to pull any punches. 

“So we flirted at the club-“

“Harry you’re magic damn near went mental the second you saw him with another man. And he looked like he was contemplating killing me when he walked in here!” Merlin immediately reminded causing Harry to cringe. 

“Listen it’s co-“

“So help me goddess if the next word out of your mouth is complicated I will slap the stupid out of you so fucking hard-“

“Alright alright! There’s no need to get so heated!” Harry quickly began hoping the calm the sorcerer. 

Merlin sighed in exasperation as he shook his head at the young wizard. “Harry you and I have an agreement, no hiding things, no lies, none of it. So what the hell is this actually about? I mean you clearly have feelings for-“

“Em it’s not that simple alright I mean-“

“But why? What’s not simple about this?! Why not just ask him out I mean you’re the one always going on about the sexual revolution-“ Merlin argued, his body on the edge of his seat ready to fight.

“That’s not what this is about!” Harry exclaimed his hand rubbing his face as though he was warring with himself as much as he was with Merlin. 

“Then what is it about!?” He exclaimed. Harry froze his lips drawn into a tight line his mind clearly far from St Mungo’s. Merlin sighed and tried to calm himself, getting heated wasn’t helping anyone so instead he stood up and took a seat on Harry bed opposite from him.   

Harry waited to lift his eyes for a moment and then another before finally meeting the sorcerers. 

Merlin smiled softly at the boy his hand falling gently on his head as though he wasn’t facing a man but rather a child. The act taking the wind out of Harry’s metaphoric sails as he took a deep breath. 

“I can’t help you if you won’t tell me what’s wrong.” Merlin reminded gently and Harry just nodded and sighed his eyes falling on the door as though Draco was still there. 

“I … I’m afraid.” Harry practically whispered, ashamed to even voice his thoughts on the matter. Merlin patted his head gently before letting his hand fall back on his lap.

“There’s nothing wrong with being afraid Harry-“ Merlin began only for Harry to cut him off. 

“Isn’t there? I mean look at me I’m the bloody saviour of the wizarding world. I’ve faced dragons and trolls and even a basilisk when I was just a ruddy kid but this is the bridge I can’t bloody well cross?!” Harry practically shouted, his own frustrations finally getting ahold of him.

Merlin’s eyes were round as saucers at the wizards sudden outburst, unsure of how to react. “Basilisk? You know what we’ll come back to that later. Harry listen to me-“

“I know what you’re going to say Merlin. I know it! Lord knows I hear it from Hermione and Ron all the bloody time. ‘Give love a chance Harry.’ ‘You don’t know what your missing out on Harry’ or oh my favourite ‘life’s to short to spend it on pining Harry’ I’ve heard it all before damn it!” He suddenly explained once again catching the sorcerer off guard. 

“That wasn’t what I was going to say at all.” Merlin cheekily replied causing Harry to glare. 

“Oh no? Then what? Cause I’ve probably heard that all before too.” He sniped back as Merlin rolled his eyes before meeting Harry’s challenging gaze.

“What I was going to say is that I have known some of the bravest men to ever walk the face of the earth and there’s not a single one of them that wasn’t bound by fear.” 

“Are you saying I’m not special?” Harry quickly jumped down his throat causing Merlin to scoff.

“No you idiot I’m telling you that you’re human. There’s nothing wrong with being afraid and being brave doesn’t mean not feeling fear. Bravery, true bravery comes when you take in the entirety of a situation, acknowledge your fears and make a decision on whether you want to act on that fear or against it.” 

Harry sat back, the statement knocking him off the edge in a way he hadn’t expected. “I don’t think I know how to do that when it comes to him.” He admitted honestly causing Merlin to grin from ear to ear. 

“Well I recon the first step is to acknowledge the fear, so what exactly are you afraid of?” Merlin asked patiently as Harry mulled over the question. The anxiety clawing at his heart until he forced himself to breathe through it. How he managed to spend the day chasing dark wizards without fear only for this to cause him to spiral out of control was beyond him. 

 “Em… what if I screw it up? I mean … everyone I love they … they get hurt eventually and I-“ Harry sighed as he watched the ceiling, his mind a static filled mess. 

“You think that keeping him at a distance will protect him?” Merlin’s heart clenched as he dared to ask the question. The scenario suddenly bringing himself and Arthur to mind. When Harry nodded Merlin felt his heart clench inside of his chest in agony, how could it not when he knew better than most exactly how he felt.

“I suppose I can’t blame you for that-“ Merlin began catching Harry completely off guard. 

“Seriously? I mean I was expecting the lecture of a lifetime.” Harry watched Merlin closely, the pain in his eyes, the tight clenching of his jaw, the way he fisted the hospital sheets far too tightly. “What aren’t you telling me?” 

Merlin’s eyes locked onto Harry’s, the green pinning him in place and making him feel vulnerable. The boy knew how to read him well. Better than even Merlin had expected dispite the months they’d spent living together. 

“I can’t blame you when … when I wasn’t brave enough to- to take the risk either.” The answer was purposely vague but Harry was never one to allow sleeping dogs to lie. 

“You have to give me more then that-“ Harry began only to suddenly stop when he saw the pain reflected in Merlin’s eyes. “Em?” He called, gently pulling Merlin from his thoughts. 

Merlin took a shaky breath as Harry reached over to squeeze his hand gently, his own anxiety long since abandoned in the face of his friend’s inner turmoil.

He sighed as he watched the sorcerers mind twist and turn in that head of his for a moment before saying “Listen … whatever it is- I mean I know I- I know it’s not easy to talk about this kind of thing but. I know you’re trying to be here for me and well… I want to be here for you too. No secrets right?” He asked gently causing Merlin to smile softly back at him and nod. 

Over the centuries it has become so easy for Merlin to simply lie and avoid the truth every chance it got. Avoidance was far less painful than addressing the heart of the issue and he couldn’t blame Harry for wanting to do the same. 

He looked back up at Harry and the boy matched his gaze immediately. He was waiting for him to speak and in that moment, that split second Merlin realized something that would change his life forever. 

Harry was waiting for him to set an example. Harry who a second ago was so terrified to even speak his words aloud, to admit to his fears and his worries was now looking back at him with both hope and trepidation. As though he trusted that Merlin alone would somehow be able to guide him through the murky waters of his own mind. 

What ever Merlin did next would likely set the standard for what Harry would do. All things considered it shouldn’t have surprised Merlin. Over the past few months he had become Harry’s teacher, his mentor, his friend and even like a member of his own family. Harry trusted him, looked up to him, cared for him before even himself and Merlin felt that it was nothing but the highest honour. 

He could be brave if it was for Harry. He smiled softly at the green eyed boy, the simple act causing his shoulders to finally drop and the tension to bleed from him.

“You know when Ron called me earlier I just about lost my lunch in panic.” Merlin started offhandedly causing Harry to chuckle. 

“He worries, Hermione’s somehow worse so I guess you’re at least in good company.” He joked. Merlin smiled and shook his head softly. 

“That wasn’t even what upset me. A part of me was … terrified-“

“Em I-“ Harry interjected hoping to try and lessen his worries but Merlin just shook his head and continued forward. 

“I was terrified that I’d get here and… and it would be too late. That I’d have lost you and there was nothing I could have done. That I’d have let you down-“

“Em you could never let me down!” Harry assured him but Merlin just shook his head. 

“It … it wouldn’t be the first time-“ Merlin began, his eyes tearing up suddenly when he didn’t expect it. 

“Em you’re not making much sense, just take a breath-“ 

Merlin just shook his head forcing himself to breathe and say what it was he needed to say. What Harry needed to hear because there was no way, no way in hell he would ever let Harry make the same mistakes he had. 

“I… the day Arthur died I was too late. Too late to save him and... That was also the first time I told him about my magic.”

Harry’s eyes widened in shock, the statement was like a bucket of cold water being suddenly been poured over him. “Em what do you-“

“I hid it from him. Our entire- the entire time we were together I lied to him. Magic was outlawed and at first I simply feared for my life-“

“Well of course you did they would have killed you-“ Harry began to argue. 

“No Harry it wasn’t just that! I … I was terrified to tell Arthur the truth. I wanted to protect him and I didn’t want him to have to face such a terrible conundrum. I didn’t want him to have to choose between the law and my life. I lied to him because I thought I was protecting him. I thought I was doing the right thing and instead Arthur spent his last day on this earth suffering. Not just from his deadly injuries but because the pain my lies caused him.” 

Merlin didn’t even realize a tear had fallen down his cheek but Harry couldn’t help but reach up and wipe it away. In that moment he wished it was the pain he was wiping away and not just his tears.

“Em I’m so so sorry that’s-“ He didn’t have the words to respond with yet he couldn’t help but to say something. Anything. 

“Harry I … I’ve spent a millennia wishing, wondering what might have been had I just made a different choice.” His voice was bitter as he considered the cruel hand fate had dealt him. 

“Bloody hell-“ Harry began, the anger in his voice simmering as he felt his friends pain. 

Merlin looked up at him with a soft smile that shattered the wizards heart even further. 

“What I’m trying to tell you is that I understand why you want to protect him. I just don’t want you to make the same mistakes that I did and hurt him in the balance.” Merlin finally admitted.

Harry felt like his heart might actually stop at the sound of those words. They rang true in a way he never could have expected. Merlin was right. He was so busy trying to protect Draco that he never once considered if he would even want such a thing or how he must feel.

“Fuck. You’re right.” He finally admitted and the smile that graced Merlin’s face was worth every second of agony he felt for his friend.

“I’m proud of you, and for what it’s worth… I recon this thing between you and Draco is worth the risk.” Merlin added. 

Harry smiled softly to himself as the blonde came to mind and nodded. Merlin was probably right about that too. 

—-

Later that evening Draco returned to the room and found Harry asleep in his hospital bed and Merlin asleep against his chair both snoring in synchronized unity. 

He shook his head and allowed himself to chuckle at the pair before making his way over to Harry. He couldn’t help but brush a wayward strand of hair away from his face as he thanked his lucky stars that the boy was safe. 

He didn’t even notice Merlin open one eye and smirk at the pair before quickly pretending to be asleep once more. 

Chapter Text

The warm July air felt nothing short of delightful as it brushed past Merlin on the fine Sunday afternoon. He was sat by a lovely little pond just outside of the Burrow where he was enjoying the peace of the summer, the day had been hot and dry but now as the gentle evening breeze blew past him he truly felt like this was heaven. 

His peace was quickly shattered by a loud shriek from Teddy who ran as fast as he possibly could and jumped head first into the pond splashing Merlin with more water then he’d thought to expect. 

“DAMN IT TEDDY I TOLD YOU WE WEREN’T SWIMMING TODAY!” Harry shouted as he ran after him shaking a wooden spoon like an exact copy of Molly Weasley. 

Molly to her credit didn’t know if she should be proud at Harry or annoyed with Teddy as she walked out to meet the boys. 

The Weasleys along with Harry, Teddy and Merlin were spending their Sunday at the Burrow as they often did but with weather this lovely it was no wonder no one wanted to remain indoors. Ginny had convinced George and Ron to pick up their broomsticks and go for a quick flight and their laughter and bickering could be heard clearly over head. 

Rose was laughing up a storm from where she sat with her mom on the other side of the pond, thankfully dry but extremely pleased as she watched Teddy cause chaos. 

Hermione was too busy lecturing Teddy to notice that Hugo had woken from his nap and was now quickly crawling in the opposite direction. Thankfully Arthur’s keen eye caught the boy far quicker than he’d expected and hoisted him up into his arms. 

“Oh come on Harry where’s the fun in that!” Teddy exclaimed before diving under the water clad in nothing but his shorts. 

Harry shouted at him to get out of the pond but instead Teddy splashed him with some more water, soaking his god father and once again splashing Merlin. 

Merlin sighed as he cast a drying spell on his book and prayed it wasn’t entirely destroyed before the gentle breeze he was just admiring caused his body to shiver and shake. 

“Oh dear oh dear you take those wet clothes off this instance and let me dry them for you!” Molly demanded all but forcing Merlin out of his shirt as she cast one drying spell after another. 

“It’s alright Molly I can just-“

“Teddy do not make me come in there!” Harry exclaimed only for the boy to stick out his tongue at Harry. 

Merlin sighed as he raised his wand and transfigured his pants into swim shorts and stripped off the rest of his clothes and jumped in after Teddy. 

Teddy squealed in delight as he saw Merlin coming and swam from him as quickly as he could but he hadn’t stood a chance. Merlin was a stronger swimmer than he looked and quickly swam under the water. 

Teddy stopped as he twisted and turned looking around the pond for a sign of Merlin but was unable to find him. Suddenly he screamed as he felt a hand wrap around his ankle. 

Merlin pounced on the boy tickling his feet causing him to giggle and squeal and thrash in the water. 

Merlin surfaced and pulled the boy closer to him before lifting him out of the water and throwing him back into the pond.  He whooped and shrieked with joy before falling into the water. 

“Again again!!” The boy demanded as he swam quickly over to Merlin. The sorcerer laughed as he lifted the boy and tossed him into the water again and again. 

“Em what are you doing?! I told him to get out not you to get in!” Harry shouted back as he shook his head in exasperation. Leave it to the sorcerer to join his godson in causing a ruckus. 

“It’s so nice you should get in! Live a little!” Merlin shouted back to which Harry rolled his eyes. 

“Haha very funny!” He shot back knowing full well Merlin was using his own words against him. 

Harry and Merlin had been living together for close to five months now and somehow neither could believe how quickly the time had passed. Harry’s life was truly like a whirlwind and just when Merlin thought he had the hang of it something new would take him by surprise. It was like everyone in Harry’s life decided that Merlin was now theirs to adopt and all of a sudden he had friends and a place where he belonged. 

In all his years he hadn’t fit in so easily and so quickly as he had here save and except for maybe Camelot. 

As he tossed Teddy back into the water once again he heard another splash and there was Harry taking his advice and diving right in after him. Merlin and Teddy locked eyes before swimming in opposite directions as quickly as they could so that Harry couldn’t chase them both at once. As soon as Harry would catch Teddy Merlin would distract him so the boy could make a quick getaway. 

They played and laughed and shouted at one another for what felt like forever when Molly finally shouted that play time was over and began ushering everyone inside for dinner. 

Merlin and Teddy took one look at eachother before taking the opportunity to splash Harry with as much water as they could. They both kept going until he managed to swim under water and tackle them both. 

As they rose from the water they were laughing and giggling. The sound of the children’s laughter around them was truly wonderful. The boys finally began to make their way out of the water only because none of them wanted to incur Mollys wrath. 

“Martin is that a tattoo?” Teddy asked suddenly, his finger pointing towards his forearm as Merlin reached down to pick up his wand. His eyes widened as he looked down and realized he had completely forgotten to hide it with his usual glamour. 

“He’s got another one on his back too!” Ron exclaimed as his broom finally touched down. “How have I never noticed that before? Is it a dragon? It seems awfully familiar.” 

Merlin quickly tried to grab a shirt but Teddy swiped it out of his hand and tossed it to George. 

“Oh come one let’s see it! Hey is that dragon moving!?” He exclaimed as Merlin’s eyes widened. George pushed him to turn around so he could see his back more clearly. Sure enough there was a red dragon on his back, amazingly enough the tattoo seemed alive as it moved and flew and breathed fire on his back. 

“It’s um- well you see they’re magic-“ he began as Teddy grabbed his left arm towards himself to peer at his forearm. 

“Is it a coin with a bird on it? OH its wings flutter! Harry look!” Teddy exclaimed as Harry just smiled and Hermione walked over to take a closer look. 

“I know buddy I’ve seen them the dragon one likes to wander all over him.” He said remembering the first time he saw it move across his shoulder on a sleepy Thursday night. He’d honestly thought his eyes were playing tricks on him at first. 

“When you say all over-“ George began only to be elbowed by Ginny. 

“They are wicked Martin, I didn’t know you had that kind of edge!” Merlin didn’t know if he should pop from embarrassment or just be happy that Ginny was finally warming up to him. 

“Oh no they’re not that big of a deal-“

“Martin is this a sigil?” Hermione asked as she took a closer look. 

“Oh um yeah it is…” he answered vaguely hoping to avoid the question.

“What does it mean?” Teddy asked as he reached his hand to touch it. “It’s so smooth!” 

“It um … it was a gift a friend gave me I … wanted to preserve it-“ Merlin explained with as little detail he could, Hermione began to ask another question but the sound of Mollys voice stopped them all in their tracks. 

“Come on hurry up! The food will get cold!” Her voice echoed with the use of magic and quickly everyone hurried to get cleaned up. 

Merlin couldn’t help but thank his lucky stars for the interruption he didn’t think he’d be able to manage avoiding all their questions.  

“So did they hurt when you got the tattoos?” Teddy asked the moment they entered to Burrow and Merlin groaned, of course he couldn’t just drop this. 

“Maybe a little bit but nothing I couldn’t handle!” He quickly supplied not noticing Molly’s head had practically twisted when she heard their conversation. 

“Tattoo? Who has a tattoo?!” She exclaimed, a hand menacingly stationed on her hip as she looked between Merlin and Teddy for an explanation. 

“Oh um I do-“

“What on earth for! Martin you should not be doing something so permanent to your body! What in the world were you-“ Molly began to lecture almost immediately, not caring at all what so ever that the boy she was lecturing wasn’t actually her child.

“My my I didn’t take you for the type Martin. What on earth do you have tattooed?” Andromeda asked curiously as she entered the kitchen. 

“Grandma he’s got a dragon! It breaths fire and everything! Martin show it to her please!” The boy begged with his best rendition of puppy dog eyes that he could muster. 

“Teddy you shouldn’t demand such things tattoos are very personal-“ Hermione lectured but Teddy was entirely unwilling to let the matter drop. 

“I want to see it as well, to think you’d have one in the first place!” Molly exclaimed as she brandished her spoon once again. 

Merlin looked to Harry in the hopes he could save him but the man was doing a brilliant job avoiding his eye. 

It took less then a few minutes for Molly and Andromeda to strong arm Merlin into showing him the tattoos. Both of them gasping at the sight, even they had to admit that the art was beautiful. 

“Molly is supper ready-“ Arthur stopped suddenly as he entered the kitchen his eyes wide as he took in the half naked wizard before zeroing in on the tattoo they were all admiring. “Blimey is that a pendragon!?”

Merlin froze at the words almost immediately as Harry turned to face in his direction his eyes wide. 

“Holy shit-“ he whispered only to immediately reprimanded by Molly. 

“Sorry sorry but Em- I mean is it really?” Harry asked suddenly, the meaning of the mark not lost on him as it was the others. 

“I knew I recognized it! I mean it’s on all the story books and it was on Camelot’s flags right dad?” Ron immediately recalled to which his dad nodded. 

“That’s right, you must really love those old stories don’t you Martin?” He asked kindly his smile bright as he reached up to tussle the boys hair. Merlin couldn’t help but smile sadly back at him before quickly re-dressing. There wasn’t a bone in his body that didn’t want to tell him just how much those stories really meant to him but he had no choice but to bite his tongue and smile through it. 
 

——- 

Later that night, Ron sat in his wing back chair, staring out into the garden. His mind playing back the day that they had now that the children were safely tucked away in their beds. 

He hadn’t even noticed Hermione enter the room until she fell into his lap. She smiled softly up at him and he didn’t hesitate to pull her close and breath her in. No matter how many years passed he would never tire of the peace her company brought to him. 

“Is something on your mind? You seem so far away?” She asked gently, the calm of the evening dulling even her usual intensity. 

“I was thinking about earlier. With Martin-“ he began and immediately Hermione’s eyes lit up, she always knew exactly what he was thinking. 

“About the tattoos? It’s been on my mind too, he just looked so upset when we were talking about them. I knew he was trying to cover it up but it was just so obvious, what ever reason he got them it must be painful-“ she rambled but her husband shook his head. 

“No that’s not- I mean you’re right love but that’s not what’s bothering me. I recognize it -“

“The dragon? You father pointed it out I mean you read those books all your life-“

“Not the dragon. I mean I recognized that too but it was the other one-“

“The sigil?” Hermione asked curiously, she’d wanted to ask Martin about it all afternoon but she hadn’t gotten the opportunity to catch him alone. 

“Yeah I’m sure I’ve seen it before. I know I have, I just can’t for the life of me remember where.” Ron confessed, his mind kept going back to the image, the bird on the coin shouldn’t have stood out to him but for some reason he knew it did. 

“Well maybe you have I mean we know Martin’s hundreds of years old. Maybe you saw it in a text book-“

“Come on ‘Mione you know I don’t remember a thing I’ve read in a text book. But I’m sure I’ve seen that mark before-“

Hermione and Ron sat in silence for a moment, their brains spinning a hundred miles a minute as they tried to make sense of the mystery when Hermione suddenly stood up. 

“What is it? Have you thought of something?” He knew his wife was onto something brilliant and the way she smiled at him in that moment made him fall in love with her all over again. 

“You said it yourself Ron! You don’t remember a single textbook so then what do you remember?” She asked before running to their floo. 

Ron stoped as he considered her riddle and realized he knew exactly what she meant. Hermione quickly lit the fire and called the Burrow. 

“Hermione dear is everything alright?” Molly answered quickly, clearly concerned by the sudden late night call. 

“Hi Molly, yes everything alright I was just wondering if I could speak to Arthur? I have a quick favour.” 

“Oh alright let me just call him-“ Molly quickly replied, even she knew it was best not to question Hermione when she got all wound up about something. 

“Hermione dear, is everything alright?” Arthur’s voice quickly asked as his face appeared in the flame. 

“Yes yes I’m so sorry to bother you so late-“

“Oh it’s no trouble at all dear!” Arthur quickly replied, honestly he was quite pleased whenever any of the kids needed his help. 

“I was wondering if I could borrow your books, the ones on Camelot and King Arthur?” She asked with a sudden excitement in her voice that caused Arthur much confusion. 

“Those old books? Well of course dear what’s mine is yours-“

“Can I come get them now? I’m just dying to get my hands on them!” She pushed hoping against all hope that the Weasley patriarch would agree. Her father in law looked at her as though she’d grown another head before sighing in defeat. 

“Oh course you may dear I’ll go get them ready for you.” 

Within the hour Ron and Hermione had turned their study into ground zero for their investigation. 

“You’re right about Camelot’s flag being everywhere I mean it’s on the cover of every single book.” Hermione commented as she poured over the story books containing the myths. 

“Yeah well it’s their ruddy flag so I suppose it makes sens-“ Ron stopped mid sentence, the silence triggering Hermione to raise her head. 

“Have you found something?” 

Ron flipped over the book the page clearly depicting the pendragon insignia. 

“Ron we already know that it’s-“

“No ‘Mione listen to what’s written!-

The symbol of the Pendragon is most noted for its place on the Camelots flag but the symbol derives its meaning from the House of Pendragon. The ancient house of Pendragon ruled over Camelot and the insignia is passed down from father to child. Most notable owners of the insignia include King Uther Pendragon, King Arthur Pendragon and the illegitimate daughter of King Uther, Morgana (le Fay) Pendragon. 

“Both Martin’s tattoo’s are insignia!” 

Hermione’s quickly closed her book and circled the table to read over Ron’s shoulder.  Her eyes scanned the text at record speed before turning the page. Both members of the golden trio gasped, there right before their eyes was the sigil Martin wore on his forearm. Their eyes locked for a second before Hermione began to read the text out loud. 

This insignia bares the image of a white dove atop the crest of the house of de Bois. The insignia belonged to Ygraine de Bois Pendragon. Wife of king Uther Pendragon and Queen of Camelot. 

Queen Ygraine was beloved by her people and known for her kindness and loyalty. Her only child and rightful owner of the insignia was the famous King Arthur. 

Both Hermione and Ron froze as the words played over and over again in her mind. Hermione’s eyes continued to scan the page for more information but there was none. She read the paragraph again and again before flipping back to the last page and reading it again. 

“Why in the world would Martin need two tattoos to remind him of Camelot?” Ron asked himself unable to understand what they could have meant when Hermione froze next to him. “What is it?” 

“Do you remember what he said? When Teddy asked him about it! He said that it was a gift from a friend Ronald!” Her voice shrill as her discovery cemented itself in her mind. 

“You think someone knew he was balmy for the old stories and gave him the sigil?” 

“No Ron sigils aren’t given as gifts willy nilly! They’re passed down through the family tree or they’re gifted to partners, giving such a gift it’s not something done so cavalierly!” Hermione tried to tell him as Ron’s eyes widened his mind putting two and two together. 

“Then who ever gave it to him-“

“Had to be its rightful owner!” She finished their eyes falling back to the page as one name stood out among all the rest. 

“He was waiting in Avalon-“ Ron began. 

“Martin Emerson is just a bastardized version of-“ Hermione continued. 

“Merlin Emrys” “Merlin Emrys”

They both said in a unison as they locked eyes unwilling to believe what was right there in front of them.  

Hermione pulled away and all but collapsed in the seat next to Ron, the discovery reverberating through them both. 

“I suppose it does make sense-“ Hermione said finally. 

“Really cause I still can’t wrap my head around it. I mean he’s our kids favourite baby sitter for Merl- DAMN IT! I bloody well scream his name 500 times a bloody day!” Ron shouted in abject horror. “No no way this cannot be right Hermione-“

“Ron it has to be! I mean think about what death said! He’s been alive 1500 years, he was hiding in Avalon, he gone by many names and identities-“

“She said he was waiting for someone!” Ron exclaimed, his eyes falling to the open page of a story book on the table. A painting of Arthur pulling Excalibur from the stone starring back at him. 

“She meant King Arthur.” Hermione replied her eyes wide as the reality of the situation sank in. 

“He’s just been alive? All this time and no one’s ever-“ Ron couldn’t even believe it. 

“Who would catch on Ronald. He’s the strongest wizard who’s ever walked this earth. Which explains the magic he could do! I knew it I told you-“

“Yes yes you were right dear, I’m sorry I didn’t want to believe that one of our best friends is an all powerful and immortal warlock!” Ron’s voice was reaching that octave that was bordering on shrill. 

“He’s changed Hugo’s diapers for gods sake. I mean I can’t exactly believe it either. I can’t believe Harry didn’t tell us!” Hermione didn’t know whether she would yell at him first or just jump straight to killing him the next time she saw him. 

“I mean I don’t think I’d have believed it even if he had. I mean it’s not like he looks all powerful, I recon a strong wind would be enough to send him flying.” Ron commented his hands rubbing his eyes when a thought suddenly occurred to him. “‘Mione I think I know why death was all worried for him-“

“What do you mean-“

“In the books, I’m sure I read it but I kept forgetting to mention it to him. The books say that Lake Avelon is the final resting place of King Arthur.” Ron’s words made Hermione’s blood run cold. 

“He’s … he’s been waiting at his grave for the last 200 years in the hopes that he’ll-“

“I mean… he’s the once and future king of Albion.” Ron repeated, the words of the legend sitting heavy on his tongue. 

“We have to talk to him Ron. I mean we can’t keep it from them-“

“Blimey I’m supposed to go to work with Harry tomorrow! I mean how am I not just going to blurt it out the second I see him?” Ron exclaimed as he thought about how the hell he’d deal with this. The ministry was full of ever present eyes and ears! 

“No absolutely not we need to talk to them tomorrow!” Hermione to Ron’s horror. 

“Darling we’re Aurors we can’t just-“ 

“Send a note to Robards! Tell him you and Harry have a family emergency to deal with!” Hermione demanded. 

“He’s not going to believe that!” Ron argued. 

“Well it’s the bloody truth!“ Hermione shot back as the couple stared of as they stood at a standstill. 

Finally Ron groaned and conjured his quill and ink to scribble down the note before sending it off as Hermione did the same for St. Mungo’s. 

Sooner than they expected, a response arrived from the Head Auror. 

“What does it say?” Hermione asked as Ron scratched his head in utter confusion. 

“It says: if you’re pulling that card I don’t even want to know what you lot are up to.” Ron couldn’t believe his eyes. 

“I suppose he’s not wrong.” Hermione commented, her mind blank as she continued to process the news. 

“So what’s the plan?” Ron hazarded to ask but Hermione shrugged, unsure how to tackle this situation. 

“I think we should drop the kids off at your mums and then we head them off first thing in the morning?” She offered. 

“Tomorrow morning it is.” Ron agreed. 

Chapter Text

Merlin yawned as he made his way down the stairs and towards the kitchen. The smell of tea too tempting to avoid despite the early hour. He pulled his robe tightly around him, the house was always chilly in the mornings even during the dead of summer. As he rounded the corner to the kitchen he went to greet Harry only to yelp loudly at the two sets of eyes staring expectantly back at him. 

Ron and Hermione didn’t even look perturbed as they continued to drink their tea. 

“Good morning Martin, did you have a good nights sleep?” Hermione asked as though this was just a normal morning unlike any other. 

“Sleep? Yup it was great really nice, bed was comfortable, cooling charm worked great really. Lovely lovely night-“ he rambled tensely as he heard noice coming from upstairs. “Harry! Ron and Hermione are here for a visit!” He called. 

All three heads turned towards the entryway  as they heard Harry barrel down the stairs, as he entered the kitchen his hair was pointed in every direction, his glasses were askew and his robe was half off one shoulder. 

“What in the- Ron we need to be at the ministry in-“ Harry began, his head whipping back and forth between his friends who didn’t look the least bit concerned. Their calm exteriors only causing Harry to be more concerned. 

“No need I wrote to Robards last night that we had an urgent matter to deal with.” Ron explained as he took another sip of his tea. He was greatly enjoying making the black haired men sweat. 

“Urgent matter what the hell- oh.” He stopped suddenly his eyes going between his friends and Merlin. They were both watching him closely. 

Harry couldn’t help but to grin as he pulled out a chair and took a seat at the table across from Hermione. He knew better than to sit within arms range for this. Merlin sighed and took the seat next to her and opposite Ron. 

“So which one was it that clued you off then? The dragon or the sigil?” Merlin asked his eyes meeting Harry’s. 

“Yeah we’ve got a wager going and I’d really like to be a few galleons richer, please tell me it was the dragon?” Harry immediately asked causing Hermione to anger. 

“Harry James Potter you’ve been making bets on us?! Why the hell didn’t you tell us about this in the first place!” Hermione demanded as she slammed her hands against the table in rage. 

Merlin could feel the headache coming on, he extended a hand as his eyes shone gold, his tea quickly pouring itself and the cup levitated to meet his outstretched hand. 

“Bloody wicked! How’d your eyes do that?!” Ron exclaimed as he stared intently at Merlin in the hopes of seeing it again. The sorcerer smiled softly before letting his magic make every candle in the kitchen suddenly danced to life and his eyes glowing with them. Ron and Hermione jumped back at the powerful show of magic. 

“It’s my magic. When I use my wand I can control it better and keep my eyes from lighting up but when I use more magic, stronger magic my eyes light up with the magic itself-“ he began to explain before Hermione cut him off. 

“I’ve read about this! Before Wands became common place it was common, there’s still cases of it happening I remember coming across the phenomenon in footnotes-“

“Darling as much as I enjoy hearing you go on and on about footnotes I think we have more important matters to discuss?” Ron quickly reminded, his eyes glancing between the eerily quiet men. 

 “I’m still waiting to find out who won the bet.” Harry joked causing Hermione to glare sharply at him. 

“Well if you must know it was the sigil. We found an exact copy of it in one of Arthur’s books.” Hermione confirmed as she pulled the book out of her bag and opened it to the page in question. Harry immediately reached for it pulling it close and reading the text his eyes widening as he read it. 

“You didn’t tell me it belonged to Arthur.” Harry noted softly, not wanting to upset his friend with the sensitive line of questioning. 

Merlin’s eyes closed tightly and his hand clutched his tea cup begging that its heat would ground him when all his mind could do was remember the night Arthur gave him the gift.  

“Yeah he… it was the last thing he had that belonged to his mother… He’d held on to it his entire life and I- I didn’t think he should have given it to me but he was adamant.” Merlin explained his eyes turning towards his tea as though he would find the answers to his questions at the bottom of the cup. “He was stubborn as a mule once he’d made up his mind.” 

“A part of me didn’t want to believe it.” Ron stated his eyes locked on Merlin. Merlin’s gaze rose to meet him and he smiled softly. It was only a ghost of the smile Ron was used to seeing and his heart clenched painfully as he watched the pain flash across his friend’s face. 

“Mart- I suppose I should call you Merlin now shouldn’t I?” Hermione asked gently, her body turned towards Merlin. 

Merlin smiled softly back at her before saying “it’s up to you. I know it can be a little-“

“Mental?” Ron supplied as Harry chuckled. 

“Listen it … it’s not like it changes anything really.” Hermione quickly reminded her hand reaching for Merlin’s tea cup and pulling it out of his hands. His eyes widened as she took his hands in her own and pulled them closer to her. 

“Hermione-“ Merlin began but she stoped him before he could even continue. 

“No now you listen to me, I don’t care who you are. Whether you want to be Martin or Merlin or whoever the bloody hell else. You’re my friend first and nothing. And I mean it when I say that nothing will change that!” Hermione assured him with such force of conviction that Merlin felt his eyes fog. 

Even after all of Harry’s assurances and all the time he’d come to spend with his friends a part of him, a terrified and hopeless part of him, still feared that this truth would tear apart everything he’d built over the last few months.
 

“I … Hermione I don’t know what to say.” His voice cracked under the weight of his emotions and Hermione didn’t hesitate he pull her friend close, both in tears at this point. 

Ron and Harry shared a look before standing up and rounding the table before pulling them both into a tight group hug filled with assurances that nothing would change as a result of this. Merlin couldn’t believe it but he thanked every single god and goddess there was for letting this be true. 

Merlin finally felt like he could actually breathe again as the tension in his chest eased under the watchful gaze of his friends. 

“Are you sure you’re alright mate? I mean you’re usually so chipper-“ Ron asked suddenly as he collapsed on the couches in the living room, as they slowly gravitated to the comfier seating. 

“He’s always like this when the king comes up.” Harry advised. Somewhere along the way he’d realized that avoiding the name made the conversation easier for the sorcerer. 

Merlin shot him a soft smile as he sat down on the love seat, Hermione and Harry quickly taking up either side of him. 

“I can’t help it. I mean there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t miss him.” Merlin admitted softly the image of his smile coming to Merlin’s mind unprompted. 

“Can I- I mean I don’t want to over step-“ Ron began causing Merlin to cringe, he hated the very idea of Ron not speaking his mind with him. His honesty had become such a welcome part of his life he didn’t want to lose that just because of his past. 

“No you can ask- anything you want I mean we have a rule-“

“No lies, no secrets everything’s on the table. No exceptions.” Harry finished before suddenly getting up and grabbing a throw blanket to toss over them.

All three sets of eyes stared back at him. “What it’s comforting! Oh I should probably grab tissues-“

“I’m not going to cry!” Merlin argued to which Harry rolled his eyes. 

“Please you always cry you big baby.” He joked only for Merlin to smack him the second he sat down. “Ouch! I was only joking!”

Hermione rolled her eyes as Ron laughed at his expense. 

“What were you going to ask Ron?” Merlin asked now that his curiosity was peaked. 

“Well I mean … you know? What was he like?” Ron asked in a whisper as though if he said it out loud the old king would rise from the grave just to scare him. 

Merlin laughed at his antics as Hermione began to reprimand him about asking touchy questions. “No no it’s alright I meant what I said. Nothings off the table.” 

Hermione calmed a bit after that before they all looked to Merlin clearly very curious for an answer. 

“You shouldn’t expect too much, his answers will just put you to sleep.” Harry teased getting another glare from Hermione. “What it’s true, go on tell them!” 

Merlin rolled his eyes as he reached past Harry and grabbed a throw pillow to hold in his arms. 

“Ron … he was brilliant. I mean the stories don’t do him justice he was every bit as good and kind and honourable as you could imagine.” Merlin admitted causing Ron’s eyes to light up. The idea that his childhood hero was truly all the things he’d expected made him happier then he’d ever considered. 

Harry smiled as he watched Merlin speak, it was obvious how much more comfortable he was now. He remembered that first night where he held Merlin as he cried on his shoulder. The was he was barely able to say a word about him. This was progress and he was so damn thankful for it. 

“Did they really have a round table?” Hermione asked suddenly her own eyes bright at the prospect of learning more. 

Merlin laughed and nodded “I’ve kept it in Avalon if you’d like to see it-“

“What really?” Ron exclaimed with such force that he seemed almost ready to go looking for it this second causing Merlin to laugh. 

“Yup. I’ve kept a lot of things from my time in Camelot. They’re mostly in my home but I’ll show you one day.” 

“Along with your books?” Hermione asked suddenly causing Merlin to laugh. 

“Yes including my library which I must admit is quite brilliant-“

“Oh no I know where this is going! One second we’re looking at all the books and the next I’m raising our children alone cause I can’t drag you away!” Ron immediately teased causing Hermione to glare. 

“I will have you know I’m a very responsible parent thank you very much. I’d just bring the children with me.” Ron smacked the palm of his hand to his face so quickly that Merlin couldn’t help but to laugh. 
 

“Mental, that’s what you are woman honestly.” He bemoaned as though he wasn’t the one who begged Hermione to marry him.

“Oh my god Merlin it just occurred to me. I mean I’ve always been curious but there’s so little known about her even though she was a Queen-“

“Are you asking about Gwen?” Merlin asked with a smile as Hermione nodded. 

“Was she really the fairest in the land?” Ron asked jokingly as though he was imitating 
 old Mr. Binn. Merlin laughed before nodding. 

“She was, she really really was. I met her the day I came to Camelot and she was wonderful. Truth be told Hermione you’ve always reminded me of her.” Merlin admitted causing with witch to blush red. 

“Oh no I mean I couldn’t possibly be- I mean she was a queen!” Hermione immediately began to which Merlin shook his head and laughed. 

“She was a beautiful queen but she wasn’t always. She and I, we were servants. She was Morgana’s lady in waiting and I was Arthur’s man servant. There wasn’t a drop of royal blood in either of our veins and when Arthur took her as his wife it was … tough to say the least.” Merlin explained causing both Ron and Hermione to share a look of surprise. 

“The books don’t say a thing about her lineage I always thought she was a noble-“ Ron began but Merlin just laughed as he thought of his old friend. 

“No no I always thought that was what made her such a brilliant queen. She cared about the wellbeing of all of her subjects not just the nobility. She was also brilliantly effective, I mean she had the castle wrapped around her little finger. She was fearless, she’d even go toe to toe with Arthur if the occasion called for it.” The memories brought a warmth to Merlin’s chest that he hadn’t felt in ages. Being able to talk about it, about the friends he loved so dearly was freeing.  “She was my closest friend.” 

Harry smiled as he watched Merlin open up, the stories bringing a light to his eyes that was usually missing when the topic had come up in the past. 

“Given that she was so pretty and all…” Harry teased causing Merlin to roll his eyes and shoved the wizard. 

“Honestly every single time you start with this. I’m telling you my love life was not that interesting! I mean between dealing with Arthur and his endless list of stupid chores and Guias’ and his endless list of chores on top of hiding my magic and keeping everyone alive I mean it was a miracle that the citadel didn’t crumble every other week!” Merlin ranted as though the memories were fresh from yesterday and not a millennium prior. 

“So you never once thought about snogging the fair Queen?” Harry hazarded the question only to be smacked by a throw pillow. 

“You really don’t understand the sanctity of marriage-“

“Hey I’m not the one who’s been involved in an affair-“ Harry immediately deflected. 

“What!? Martin is that true?!” Hermione all but screeched as the man raised both hands in surrender. 

“I swear I had no idea Hermione! I mean I didn’t know he was married at the time!” He quickly advised as Ron and Harry laughed. 

“You old slag I didn’t know I had it in you!” Ron exclaimed as Merlin quickly shook his head. 

“I do not! I mean I would never! … though now that I think about it Gwen did kiss me once-“

“What! Really? All that lecture and you did snog the Queen!?” Harry exclaimed only to be met with a glare. 

“She wasn’t Queen then and it was all the heat of the moment! I mean she thought I was going to die and then I woke up and she was just really happy! That’s all!” Merlin explained as he flailed about which did absolutely nothing to prove his point. 

“You were about to die?” Hermione asked causing Merlin’s eyes to widen. 

“Um well yes- I mean it happen more often then I’d like to admit. There were just so many close calls back then-“ 

“Reminds me of our time at Hogwarts” Ron joked caused Hermione to glare and Harry to laugh. 

“Mate that’s exactly what it’s like I mean every time he tell me a crazy story it reminds me of school-“ Harry added much to Merlin’s annoyance. 

“That’s more concerning! I mean you were children in school for goddess sake. Why the hell were you fighting for life or death every third day? I mean at least in Camelot it was cause everyone was always trying to kill Arthur.” Merlin argued, still frustrated that Harry and the others had ever been at risk at all. He had choice words for the long dead head master if he ever got the chance to air out his grievances. 

“Why were people always trying to kill him? I mean wasn’t he a good guy?” Ron asked curiously. 

“So was I but that didn’t stop people from trying to kill me.” Harry offered by way of explanation. 

“The fact that anyone tried to kill you makes my blood boil I mean you were a child! Atleast Arthur was a grown man, and it was always something different I mean most people targeted him to get revenge against Uther, others just wanted power. To be honest I lost count of how many assassination attempts I thwarted.” Merlin bemoaned as he sat back against the couch exhausted by just the memories. It was a wonder he didn’t collapse from exhaustion weekly in Camelot. 

“Was he as cruel as they say? Uther I mean?” Hermione asked suddenly, her eyes dark as she remembered the accounts of the purge. A grim look passed over Merlin’s face as he recalled the man. 

“Yeah. In every meaning of the word.” Merlin would never forgive that monster for what he did to Camelot, to his father, to his people and worst of all to his own children. 

“But Merlin I mean if magic was banned how did you-“ Ron began before Harry could stop him from asking. 

“I hid. I pretended to just be a normal servant and kept my abilities hidden. There were a few close calls but I managed to avoid scrutiny.” Merlin explained his eyes distant as he remembered the few times he’d come close to being sentenced to the stake. “If I’d been caught during Uthers reign I would have been dead. No doubt about that.” 

Everyone sat in silence for a moment as they mulled over the reality of Merlin’s past. It was truly harrowing when you took a minute to think about it.

“For what it’s worth I’m glad you didn’t.” Ron finally said his eyes locking with Merlin’s. “I’m glad you’re alive and that you’re here. With us.”

Merlin smiled so brightly it could have lit up the room. “Thank you Ron.” He whispered as Harry and Hermione quickly agreed, Hermione’s hand once again reaching for Merlin and holding it safe in hers. 

“So which of the knights were the fittest?”
Harry asked suddenly, hoping to drag them back to easier waters. 

Merlin rolled his eyes at the green eyed boy, seeing thorough him in an instant. “You know my answer to that-“

“Yeah yeah Arthur’s chest would make you swoon on sight, what about the others?” He quickly replied his first taunt causing Merlin to roll his eyes. 

“I regret telling you that I mean how often are you going to tease me-“ 

“Oi and I don’t need any images in my mind I mean he’s my childhood hero for Merl-DAMN IT I KEEP SAYING IT!” He shouted causing everyone to laugh hysterically.

“Hey atleast it’s not your name being dragged out every couple of seconds! I mean Seamus references my balls in every third sentence!” The sorcerer immediately complained causing everyone to laugh even harder. 

“George is just as bad I mean-“ Hermione began causing Merlin to interject. 

“Oh don’t even get me started, why the hell is he always going on about Morgana’s cleavage I mean-“ 

“Wait wait did you ever snog Morgana?” Harry asked causing Merlin to smack him with a throw pillow again. 

“No for the love of- no Harry no. I did not snog Morgana! She was nobility and way above my station and then there was the extensive amount of time she spent trying to kill everyone I loved-“ Merlin ranted much to Harry’s enjoyment. He loved getting on the sorcerers nerves. 

“Was she always mental? I mean there’s no evil with or wizard that isn’t compared to her at some point or another.” Ron asked causing Merlin to fall quiet suddenly. He shook his head. 

“No. She wasn’t. I … I blame myself for who she became, myself and Uther that is. She wasn’t evil, if she’d had a different, if things had been different she would have never become…cruel.” In all the years since her passing he had never once admitted that to another person but there was not a day that went by where he didn’t bear the weight of that truth. 

Hermione squeezed his hand and he turned to her. She smiled gently and shifted closer to him, letting her head fall on his shoulder. “It’s best not to dwell on the past.” She said to which he nodded, he knew she was right but he couldn’t help but blame himself, but the warmth of Hermione next to him made it easier the let go of that guilt even momentarily. 

“You didn’t answer my question about the knights?” Harry teased causing Merlin to roll his eyes fondly. 

“It’s not an easy answer if Arthur’s out of the running. I mean I recon it would be Gwaine he was handsome and funny but then there was Lance all sweet and gentle. Truth be told they were all lookers in their own right. The court used to joke that Arthur had the best looking knights in all of Albion.” Merlin joked, the comments would always get Arthur in a huff. 

Harry caught his eyes and waggled his eyebrows in a way that caused Merlin to laugh. “You’re honestly ridiculous and no. I didn’t have any improper relations with the knights either thank you very much. I recon none of them would have even been interested.” Merlin admitted getting a look from all three of his friends. “What?”

“Mate I’m not even into men and I think you’re fit. I recon they could have been down right hitting on you and you wouldn’t have even noticed.” Ron stated as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

“I am no such-“ Merlin began to protest. 

“I think he’s probably right Merlin. I mean I’ve seen people hit on you shamelessly and you just don’t even register it-“ Hermione quickly added much to Merlin’s abject horror. 

“What no- when!?” Merlin began. 

“Just the other day! Don’t you remember when we were at the bookshop?” Hermione asked in the tone that made her sound like she was all knowing. 

“Yes what about it, we ran into your friend-“

“Blaise Zabini is not my friend, he was only talking to me because he was trying to get into your pants!” Hermione practically shouted her eyes wide as she stared at Merlin, unable to believe she was hearing this. 

“He was talking to us about his book collection! How was that flirting?” Merlin demanded as Harry and Ron were doing everything in their power not to burst out laughing. 

“He invited you to spend your summer at his sea side villa with him on the Amalfi bloody coast!” Hermione shouted. 

“To admire his book collection!” Merlin shouted back before freezing suddenly. “Holy shit he was flirting with me?!” He exclaimed causing Ron and Harry to burst out laughing unable to catch their breaths. 

“I’m sure his book collections not the only thing he’d like you to admire-“ Ron joked causing Harry to laugh till his eyes began to tear up. 

“Yeah I hear he likes to collect lots of pretty things, if you ask nicely enough I bet he’ll agree to collect you too.” Harry added in the moment he had even a second to breathe. 

“I hate you I hate you both damn it!” Merlin complained his mind still reeling. “Hermione why didn’t you tell me sooner I mean he was so handsome!” 

“You must be joking! He has a new floozy on his arm every other week!” She exclaimed horrified. She was not going to stand by and let her friend get his heart broken. 

“So? I can be a floozy! I mean it’s not like I want to marry the man-“ Harry was doubled over in laughter at this point. 

“You really shouldn’t I mean his mums husbands have all mysteriously died or vanished-“ Ron happily supplied. 

“Handsome date and a murder mystery! I could have two in one!” Merlin joked causing Hermione to smack his arm. Honestly why was it that all of her friends were so out of their damn minds. They laughed long and hard before they spent the rest of their day exchanging stories and asking questions well into the night. 

Merlin felt more at ease that night than he had in centuries. 

Chapter Text

“Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Harry, happy birthday too you. “ 

Harry blinked open his eyes, his vision foggy as he saw Merlin standing above him with what must have been a cake in his hands. He squinted at him for a moment before reaching for his glasses and putting them on as he sat up. 

“Em’ you didn’t have to-“

“I wanted to you dolt.” He replied as he sat down on the bed across from him and put  the cake in his hands. Harry placed the cake on his lap as Merlin pulled him into a hug before whispering happy birthday once again. 

Harry smiled happily back at him before turning to the cake, it was clearly home made and looked to be a product of Merlin’s recent experiments with baking but there was a single candle standing proudly at attention in its centre. 

“Make a wish Harry” Merlin prompted causing Harry to smile brightly back at him. He didn’t know how to tell the sorcerer that he already had everything he’d ever wanted but thought of a wish and blew his candle out. 

Merlin pulled out a couple of forks from his pocket before crawling onto the other side of the bed and under the covers. He managed to convince Harry to sit in bed and enjoy the cake and Harry couldn’t think of a better start to the day. 

“So how old are you today?” Merlin asked causing Harry to shoot him a glare. The sorcerer had been teasing him all week about his age. 

“Officially 27 years old thank you very much!” He assured making Merlin chuckle. He reached over and grabbed Harry by the cheek squeezing it like he was nothing more then a new born. 

“Awww little baby is all grown up!” Merlin explained as Harry tried to bat his hands away from him. 

“Oh shut up you’re just too old to have opinions on age.” Harry teased right back as Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Yes yes I’m old, you’d think someone with your brilliance would come up with a better comeback after all this time.” Merlin joked as he picked up another fork full of cake, quite pleased with his most recent experiment. 

“Would you like me to call you a deformed toad next time?” Harry shot back as he took another bite of cake. 

“You’re lucky it’s your birthday or I’d be turning you into one.” Merlin happily supplied as Harry laughed. He really couldn’t put it past the sorcerer to do exactly that. 

“So are you going to tell me what we’re doing today? You and Hermione have been especially tight lipped all week.” Harry asked as he eyed the sorcerer hoping he’d give something away now that the day had arrived. 

Merlin smirked and shrugged nonchalantly. “Oh nothing for you to concern yourself with. We just have to be ready for our regular Sunday brunch at the Burrow thats all. You heard Hermione-“

“Yeah yeah Hermione already lectured me about it yesterday. Can’t you just tell me-“

“Nope not happening I’m more scared of her than I am you.” Merlin admitted making Harry chuckle. He always knew Hermione was scary but hearing it from Merlin was objectively hilarious. 

“Alright fine I guess I’ll just wait for the surprise.” He bemoaned like a pouting toddler. 

Merlin rolled his eyes before sighing and reaching out his hand, a neatly wrapped gift levitated to him. “Well maybe this will make up for the secrets.” 

Harry’s eyes lit up like a child on Christmas as he reached for the gift and immediately tore off the wrapping paper. Merlin laughed as he watched the absolute joy on the boys face as he saw the leather bound book. “You got me a book?” 

“Open it you dolt.” Merlin poked. Harry flipped to the first page and gasped, in front of him was a beautiful painting, a portrait of his mother and father smiling back at him. 

“Em how-“

“I painted them. The books filled with painting of people you love, memories we’ve made, places that mean something to you. Ron and Hermione helped me find-“ Merlin was cut off as Harry pulled him into a tight hug. 

“You painted all of these? Merlin I - Thank you.”

Merlin smiled as he returned the hug and ruffled Harry’s hair, his own smile so big it was a wonder his cheeks didn’t hurt. “Anything for you Harry. Happy birthday” he wished as he hugged him tight one last time before letting go. 

Harry smiled back at him like he’d hung the stars before going through the album of paintings. 

True to his word there were paintings of him Ron and Hermione in school. Paintings of Sirius and Remus, paintings of Tonks and Teddy, and even one of Fred and George. 

There were also paintings of him and Teddy playing in the park, him sleeping on the ground with Rose and Hugo after babysitting, paintings of all his friends and family. As he flipped to the next page there was even a painting of him and Draco. In it he was asleep in what seemed to be St. Mungo’s as Draco brushed a strand of hair from his face. The blonde was smiling softly down at him in the painting and Harry couldn’t help but wonder if Merlin had happen to witness the moment. He smiled  at the painting before looking back at Merlin. 

“You didn’t have to-“ Harry began but Merlin rolled his eyes at the boy. 

“I wanted to. Also look on the last page.”  

Harry turned to the last page and laughed, there was a painting of him and Merlin’s first meeting in Avalon. He and Merlin were shaking hands. The beginning of their unconventional friendship. 

“It’s amazing-“

“I still can’t believe you didn’t realize who I was.” Merlin teased as Harry laughed. In hindsight it was hilarious but he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. 

“Well in my defence-“

“You can be a little thick?” Merlin interjected causing Harry to chuckle. 

“Okay maybe a little.” He admitted with a smile. 

As the day progressed Harry found that he couldn’t keep the smile off his face. Upon arriving to the Burrow he found the entire Weasley family, alongside Andromeda and Teddy waiting for him. He smiled and laughed as he hugged them all, even Bill and Percy were there with their wives and children to celebrate. 

When Charlie pulled him in for a hug he couldn’t help but feel loved. After all they’d gone so far out of their way to be there just for him. Molly was so happy as she hugged him tight and told him how proud she was of the man he had become. He had been near tears already but then ther was Andromeda telling him he was a fine man and the best son she could have ever imagined having. 

He was seconds from crying when Teddy shyly offering him a present. His eyes widened as he saw what was clearly a handmade mug beneath the wrapping that said “Worlds Greatest Harry.” Harry picked the boy up into his arms like he was still a baby and hugged him tight, unable to hold back the tears for a second longer. 

The brunch passed in a chaotic fury of Weasley flavoured chaos Harry caught Hermione and Merlin exchange a look before leaving to the back of the Burrow. He wanted to try and follow them out but Charlie diverted him almost immediately with a handsome smirk and a promise that he’d know soon enough. 

He hated the idea of waiting but Charlie was right. It wasn’t long before George was tying a blindfold across his eyes and marching him out of the Burrow as Harry complained that this was entirely unnecessary. 

As he came to a stop he waiting a moment and finally the blindfold came off. He gasped, there in front of him were all his friends shouting “SURPRISE!” 

He couldn’t believe it, everyone was there! All of his friends from Hogwarts, his professors, the members of the order, and even his friends from the ministry. He couldn’t believe his eyes as he scanned over the crowd before stopping suddenly. Draco was right there smirking right back at him. 

“I - what- how did you?-“ he turned to his right and watched Hermione and Merlin share a high five before everyone practically descended upon Harry.

It was beyond anything Harry could have imagined, Hagrid quickly rushed to him and hoisted the Auror up into his arms delighted to be able to wish him a happy birthday. 

“Ye were just a baby when I met ye- look how you’ve grown!” He exclaimed, tears in his eyes and Harry struggled to breathe in his grip. 

“Hagrid the boy can barely breath, you’ll crush him.” Professor McGonagall reprimanded as Harry was finally returned to solid ground. 

“Professor-“

“Young man I have not been your professor in almost a decade-“ she began but Harry just smiled, his eyes twinkling in a way that reminded the old Headmistress so much of James. 

“Then I can do this-“ he said as he pulled her into a hug. She smacked the boy on the shoulder before hugging him back and wishing him a very happy birthday. 

It was like time slipped through their fingers as the afternoon bled into the night, the soft sound of music played across the back yard from an enchanted radio. The perfect ambiance to a warm summer night as food, drinks, and conversations filled the air. 

Merlin laughed alongside Neville as he listened to Hagrid and Charlie share story after story about the magical creatures they’d encountered. Charlie was elbows deep in a story about his most recent rescue of a young dragon when he noticed Draco looking a little lonely at edge of the party, the blonde had brought his friend Pansy with him but it seemed that she had just left for the night. 

He politely excused himself from the conversation, his departure not noticed by the others as he made his way to the blonde. 

“Draco?” He called gently, pulling the boys gaze away from Harry who was wrapped up in taking shots with Seamus and Dean closer to the house. 

“Martin, sorry I didn’t see you there.” He began, his tone as blunt as always. 

“I wanted to thank you for coming today. I know Harry was really happy to have you here.” He began causing the blondes eyes to once again search out the green eyed auror. To no one’s surprise Harry was looking back at him and the blonde couldn’t help but to smirk. He loved knowing that Harry’s eyes were on him and him alone. 

“It was no trouble, you were decent enough to invite me I couldn’t very well have said no.” Draco quickly deflected much to Merlin’s amusement. 

“Now now I don’t think that’s entirely true. You could have said no, it would have been so easy. Coming here was the much harder decision.” Merlin acknowledged, clearly amused. 

“Aren’t you wise. Maybe we should talk the Headmistress into letting you lecture the youth.” Draco teased causing Merlin to laugh. 

“I reckon I’d be a terrible influence, I spent most of my youth getting into all kinds of trouble-“

“No wonder you and Potter make such good friends. He’s a bloody magnet for chaos.” Draco complained as he eyed Merlin over the rim of his glass of wine. 

Merlin laughed as he watched Harry alongside Draco for a moment, he suppose the boy did have a point. “Yeah I think between the two of us we’re a constant whirlwind of madness. It’s kind of nice I mean I can’t say I’ve been bored a day in my life since I’ve met him.” 

Draco rolled his eyes as he watched Merlin pointedly, his grey eyes bearing into his soul. “If I didn’t know any better I’d think that you’re trying to convince yourself that instead of me.” 

Merlin’s eyes went wide as he zeroed in on the blonde, caught entirely off guard by the observation. “I… yeah I guess I am.” 

“It’s your stupid grin that gives you away. It doesn’t match the look in your eyes.” Draco pointed out with a precision that made Merlin feel like he was on a dissection table. 

“And I thought Harry didn’t beat around the bush-“ he complained to which the blonde rolled his eyes. 

“He wants to see the good in people so damn badly that he usually misses what’s right there in front of his face.” He explained as he levitated another bottle of wine and refilled his glass before doing the same for Merlin.  The drinks made for an easy distraction. 

“So what exactly do you think he’s missing?” Merlin asked, unable to help himself from probing even when he knew better. 

Draco raised a perfect manicured eyebrow at the man. “You’re braver than you look.” 

“Foolishly so I reckon.” Merlin added causing Draco to chuckle softly. Merlin waited as the boy looked him over once again, almost as though he was digesting Merlin. 

Draco stared at him a moment as though his mind was currently making an extensive pros and cons list about whether he should take the bait. Finally he seemed to shrug and decided to take a chance. 

“He can’t tell that you’re actually a bloody coward. Everything you do, everything you say, you do it out of fear. You love out of fear, you smile out of fear, you laugh out of fear. Like today could be the last time you ever get the chance and you could lose it all in a second.” Draco’s nonchalance undercut the severity of his remarks but they stil seemed to hang in the air between them all the same. 

“Talk about cutting me open and ripping out my heart.” Merlin joked with another easy smile. 

“Deflecting with humour. How original.” He added with a roll of his eyes. 

Merlin laughed, this time honestly, his own enjoyment pulling a smirk out of Draco. “Okay okay you win. I’m a mess but in my defence I’ve never exactly hidden that.” 

“Is this the part where you tell me about your tragic back story and I have to feign sympathy?” The blonde joked making the sorcerer laugh. 

“Not much to tell, everyone I love keeps dying. So sue me for trying to make the best of what I’ve got.” Merlin joked making the Draco roll his eyes. 

“See tragic, would you like me to pat your back and tell you everyone is in your heart or some other sentimental drivel?” Draco offered, his manicured eyebrow raised. 

“Please don’t, I got that lecture from Hermione just last week.” Merlin admitted as Draco shook his head. 

“I swear Granger spends far too much of her time reading fairytales these days. Next she’s going to be trying to cure curses with true loves kiss.” Draco shuddered at the thought. 

“Maybe we should curse Ron and put it to the test?” Merlin offered as Draco grinned. 

“Now there’s an idea I can get behind-“

“Why do I get the feeling you two are up to no good?” Harry’s voice immediately startled them both as he somehow appeared behind them without their noticing. 

“Haven’t a clue what you’re talking about Potter” Draco began. 

“Yup yup just having a lovely glass of wine“ Merlin continued. 

“And enjoying this stunning summer night-“ Draco added. 

“With such wonderful company!” Merlin finished as Draco nodded along as Harry’s eyes bounced between them both. 

“I think I prefer his company to yours Potter, he’s far less of a goody two shoes.” Draco poked, unable to help goading the man when given the opportunity. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard a lie sound so sweet.” Harry replied causing Draco to blush and Merlin to chuckle. 

“And that’s my cue to get going, it was nice seeing you Draco maybe we can go grab a drink sometime?” Merlin offered. 

Draco watched Merlin for a moment before nodding. Even he had to admit he was enjoying the man’s company and clearly he was trying to make him feel welcome. An act of kindness that wasn’t lost on the blonde even for a second. 

Merlin smiled at them both before returning to the now dwindling party and leaving the boys to each other company. 

Harry watched as Draco’s eyes followed Merlin as he walked away before turning back to him. His cheeks still flushed as he looked back at Harry. 

“I’m glad you’re here.” Harry admitted, his boyish smile causing Draco’s heart to flutter in his chest. He cursed the blasted organ as he tried to stay calm, only the boy who lived could cause him to lose control of his perfectly maintained facade so easily. 

“I … Martin invited me and it would be rude to say no.” Draco repeated hoping it would garner better results this time. 

“That’s too bad, I was hoping it was cause you wanted to see me.” Harry didn’t know if it was the alcohol or Merlin’s multiple lectures on the matter that had loosened his tongue but as he watched Draco flush he found that he didn’t want to stop. 

“Now now your head is already too big as it is any bigger and it might garner its own gravitational pull.” Draco couldn’t help but try to drag their conversations back to their regular antagonisms. That was far more comfortable than this new dynamic.

“If it’d pull you in I think it’d be worth all the trouble.” Harry joked, his grin still plastered on his face, his green eyes practically shining in the reflection of the Burrows lights. 

“If I didn’t know any better Potter I’d think you were flirting with me.” Draco teased as he raised his glass and took another sip. 

“Hmm I suppose if you’re still unsure then maybe I should work even harder.” It was like a game of wizards chess and neither man truly wanted to allow the other to win. 

“Brave of you to assume you’d be able to win me over that easily.” Draco deflected. 

“Oh baby that’s where you’re wrong. I don’t want easy, you’re worth every … last… bit… of trouble.” Harry annunciated every single word his tone dropping as he stepped closer to the blonde. 

Draco blushed something fierce at the confession, or maybe it was the pet name, it didn’t matter to Harry the reason just that it made the blonde look so pleased. Suddenly Draco looked around before gesturing to Harry and leading him around the side of the house where they were relatively alone and further from the partygoers.  

“Dragging me away from witnesses so you can murder me in peace?” Harry asked as the blonde finally met his eyes once again. 

Draco rolled his eyes before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a box. “Not today Potter but maybe if you ask nicely I’ll reconsider.” 

“Is that a gift for me?” Harry asked as he reached out to take the box from his hand, his fingers gently grazing the back of his hand as he took it. 

“Hurry up and open it already.” Draco hurried, his cheeks flush with embarrassment. 

Harry smiled at the blonde, before opening the box. In it was a beautiful black watch with a deep green face. On closer inspection he could see that the clocks face held his initials in a slightly lighter shade of green, its hands a bright gold to match the golden snake that circled the clocks face, the magic imbedded into it giving the serpent life. 

“Draco it’s beautiful-“ Harry began as he took the watch into his hands. As he turned the watch over to inspect it words appeared on the back. A magical engraving that only appeared when he looked at it. 

To the boy who lives to drive me mad. 

 ⁃ Yours Draco 

Harry’s eyes widened, as he smiled the words, his chest warm as they played on repeat in his mind. 

“Do you…” Draco trailed off afraid of what Harry would say. 

“Will you help me put it on?” Harry asked innocently enough.

Draco rolled his eyes and took the watch as Harry offered his wrist for Draco to place the time piece. As he latched it closed Harry suddenly pulled his wrist away and grabbed Draco by the waist to pull him into his chest. 

“Potter! What the hell-“ Draco began to shout until Harry’s gaze froze him in place. 

“I love it. Thank you Draco.” Harry’s voice was low as he said the words in Draco’s ear before kissing his neck. Draco shivered underneath his touch and Harry couldn’t help but to grip his waist even harder. He loved how Draco felt against him, their body’s fit together like the perfect puzzle especially now that Harry was as tall as Draco. 

Harry pulled back just enough to meet Draco’s eyes. What Harry wouldn’t give to swim in those pools of grey. 

“Happy Birthday Harry” Draco whispered, his hands reaching up to hold Harry’s jaw before leaning in to kiss him properly. 

It was like opening the floodgate, Draco’s arms wound around Harry’s neck pulling him in and Harry’s arms circled his waist. Draco felt Harry’s tongue on his lips and couldn’t help but gasp as he granted him entry. Their tongues intertwined like this was    a longstanding dance that they’d practiced many times when instead it was a first of hopefully many more.  

Draco didn’t realize as a moan escaped him, he was intoxicated with Harry and the idea of letting him go seemed impossible. 

Harry groaned as he felt Draco grind against him, finally pulling away from the kiss to look at Draco. Draco met his gaze, his eyes glassy with lust, his skin flushed as he shivered in the cool breeze of the night. 

Harry reached to tilt Draco’s chin up the second he tried to hid from his gaze. “I hate when you take your eyes of me. Even for a second.” His voice a low rumble. 

Draco nodded before pulling Harry into another kiss. The moment he had Harry back on him it was like he could feel the burning need within him quench once again. He was so lost in it that he didn’t even realized that Harry had walked him back towards the house until his back hit the wall. 

He groaned as he thumped against it. Harry tried to pull away but Draco pulled him back in. Unwilling to let him go for even a second. 

They were so lost in each other they didn’t notice the front door open. Instead they turned to hear a loud shriek and saw a shocked Ron and Arthur staring back at them. 

“MY EYES!” Ron ran back through the front door leaving his petrified father. 

“Oh dear! Sorry! Well then I’ll let you boys … get on with it-“ Arthur rambled “oh and do say hello to your mother for us Draco.” He added as an afterhought before hurrying back inside. 

Draco and Harry turned back to face one another, their arms not having moved from their embrace. As Draco’s horrified stare met Harry’s he couldn’t help but to laugh. 

“Potter this is not funny!” He shouted only making Harry laugh harder, his head falling onto his shoulder as Draco began to laugh along with him. 

It took them a few moments to finally compose themselves but before long green eyes once again met grey. 

“I should probably go.” Draco suggested though he made no attempt to move away, his hands lightly scratching against the hair on the back of Harry’s nape. 

“I hate watching you leave.” Harry admitted, the vulnerability feeling foreign on his tongue but it was worth it watching the blonde practically melt in his arms at the admission. 

“Just when I think I’ve got a handle on you Potter you throw me for a tail spin.” Draco admitted with a fond eye roll. Harry smiled as he allowed himself the opportunity to take Draco in while the voice in the back of his mind told him to never let him go. 

Draco smiled softly at him before finally pushing himself off the wall. He’d expected Harry to make room for him but instead he stayed put. Draco huffed before gently kissing his lips, the touch innocent in comparison to before. 

Harry sighed and ran a hand through his blonde hair, enjoying the softness if it under his fingertips before finally relenting and pulling away. 

Draco chuckled before gliding past him. Harry didn’t take his eyes off the blonde for a second, instead watching him apparate away. The soft smile still on Draco’s face made him look almost ethereal in the moonlight. 

He waited a moment and then another after he was gone before he finally felt like he could go back and face his family. The weight of the watch on his wrist a reminder that there was more to come. Whatever was going on between him and Draco, tonight was just the beginning. 

As he walked through the door he couldn’t keep the silly smile off his face. He felt like he was floating. 

The moment he walked inside Merlin made a beeline towards him, not hesitating to hook his arm around his neck and give him a noogie as Harry laughed and escaped his hold. 

“You kissed him!” Merlin exclaimed as Harry nodded his cheeks red as his family surrounded him. “I’m so proud of you!” He said with a ruffle of his hair causing Harry to blush harder. 

“Oh Harry dear you look so happy!” Molly gushed as she pulled the boy into a tight embrace. For a moment Harry felt his should pull back and question her approval but he was honestly just so happy that he hugged her right back. 

“Yeah after making me nearly lose my dinner. Honestly mate-“ Ron complained looking a little green but Hermione elbowed him before he continued further. 

“Oh I’m so happy for you Harry I’m so glad you finally took a chance!” Hermione exclaimed, her eyes meeting Merlin’s as they exchanged a pleased look. 

“Well we didn’t stand a chance with you two uniting forces.” Harry pointed out but Hermione just rolled her eyes. 

“Oh please I don’t think a single one of us is the least bit surprised darling. I think he’s perfect for you. I mean he is a much better man than he once was, we all know that.” Andromeda added as she reached over to Harry taking his face in her hands and placing a gentle kiss on his forehead. Harry knew she was right, Draco wasn’t the same boy he’d fought with when they were children.

 The war and adulthood had clearly changed him and there wasn’t a person in this room who hadn’t received an apology from the boy at some point after the war. He had taken making amends far more seriously than anyone expected and if that wasn’t a clear indication of his growth Harry didn’t know what was.

“You’re okay with this right? I mean I-“ Harry began but Andromedas smile put him instantly at ease. 

“Oh Darling I know how coloured your histories are but that smile on your face is the only thing that matters to me. And if it’s my nephew that’s put it there well then how could I possibly not support you both?” She asked gently which made Harry smile and nod before hugging her. “I do have one request though.” 

Harry pulled back, his brow arched as he looked at her expectantly. “Anything, what ever you need-“

“Can I come with you when you tell Lucius? I can’t wait to see the look on his stupid smug face.” Andromedas grin was practically feral in a way that reminded Harry so much of Sirius that he couldn’t help but to grin back. 

“Yes please I can’t wait to shove it in his face!” Harry agreed only to be reprimanded by Molly, but even she was smiling alongside the rest of the Weasleys  who were now exchanging idea on what Malfoy senior would do when he learned about his son’s beloved. 

It was still a wonder of the wizarding world how Lucius managed to escape a lifetime in Azkaban. Clearly he had more well wishers in the Wizengamot than anyone had expected and no one could really reject the argument that Voldemort would have killed him and his family if he ever tried to oppose him. 

The couple of years he spent in Azkaban and the following 5 years of house arrest were a slap on the wrist in light of his involvement.  Despite it all a part of Harry was incredibly pleased that he could now flaunt their relationship in front of Lucius every chance he got. This would be far more enjoyable than even watching the man rot in Azkaban. 

Harry smiled as he looked down at his watch, all in all this was the best birthday he could have ever asked for. 

— Later that Evening —

Harry collapsed onto his couch now that he had bathed and changed into his pjs, ready to spend the night watching telly with Merlin as had become tradition in their home. 

“Alright now show me the watch he got you, you’ve been staring dreamily at it all night long.” Merlin teased as he collapsed on the other end of the couch. 

Harry sat up and showed him his wrist with the watch still on it. 

“You could have just handed it to me you know?” Merlin joked to which Harry shook his head like a literal puppy. 

“Nope I’m never taking it off-“ Harry was downright adamant which just made Merlin chuckle. 

“Never huh? If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were obsessed.” The sorcerer sarcastically replied. Harry’s obsessive tendencies when it came to Draco were brought up so often in their friend group that it was a recurring joke at this point. The irony being that Harry never once seemed embarrassed or denied it. If anything he wore it like a weird badge of honour. 

“Says the man covered in tattoos for Arthur?” Harry joked to which Merlin yanked his arm so hard the boy lost balance and tumbled off the couch. “Hey! It was just a joke!” 

Merlin rolled his eyes and ignored his complaints as he closely inspected the watch. It was a beautiful piece of jewelry, clearly custom made and the gold detail and enchantments were stunning. Merlin couldn’t help but wonder how much the blonde must have spent on it because pieces like this were exceptionally rare. 

“He’s got brilliant taste I’ll give him that. I think the green is actually the exact shade of your eyes.” Merlin noted as he looked back at Harry and compared the two. 

“I wouldn’t put it past him, he’s very particular when it comes to these things.” Harry admitted his mind trailing back to earlier that night. 

“You can’t stop thinking about him can you?” Merlin noted his usual grin painted across his face.

Harry sighed the smile still on his face as he turned to Merlin and shook his head. “Em I … I didn’t want to let him go. I mean I’ve always been drawn to him and I just can’t explain it it’s-“

“Beyond anything you could possibly put into words? Like when he’s there you can feel the life humming in your very soul?” Merlin added with his usually silly smile, his eyes seeing right through Harry and straight into his heart. 

Harry smiled right back at him as he pulled his legs in and crossed them, the bright green of his eyes cutting into his blue. “When I’m with him I feel alive in a way I’ve never felt. Like I’m a live wire and there’s lightning in my veins.”

Merlin laughed his head nodding as he thought back to Arthur. “That’s love for you my friend. Everyone loves differently and I recon yours is like an ever-burning madness.”

Harry laughed at the truth of it all. It was true. He was mad. And what a beautiful madness it was. 

“Em?” He asked suddenly drawing the sorcerers attention as he cocked his head waiting for Harry to continue. “Did you ever tell him you loved him?” 

Merlin smiled softly, his gaze meeting Harry’s as he shook his head already knowing exactly who Harry was referencing. “No I… I always knew I loved him but I… I feared what would happen if he knew.” 

“You think he’d be upset?” Harry asked, his curiosity peaked. In his heart he couldn’t help but think it impossible for Merlin to love Arthur the way he obviously did and for it to be unrequited. He thought about himself and Draco and the way that they were both drawn to each other, unable to pull away from the pull of attraction that ran far deeper than words could articulate. 

“No no not really. I think at the time I feared he’d fire me or send me away. The idea of being away from him, leaving him unprotected and with danger always being around the corner… I just buried it. Plus he was my king and I his servant and a man and I know he loved Gwen-“ Merlin rambled, the words falling from his lips like an avalanche as though he’d been holding them within for centuries. Probably because he had. 

“You chose his happiness over your own.” Harry interjected, his eyes soft as he watched Merlin smile sadly and nod. 

“Draco called me a coward earlier tonight-“

“Of course he did, honestly Em you’re not a-“ Harry began. 

“He was right Harry.” He interjected before Harry could try and assure him otherwise. “I am a coward. Truth be told I was just too afraid of losing him that I … I never took a chance. Not with telling him my feelings or about my magic.” 

Harry nodded, his heart heavy as he thought about the cruelty of it all. He couldn’t imagine losing Draco. He knew deep down that it would destroy him. “I remember during the war when we escaped from the manor. There wasn’t a bone in my body that didn’t want to take him with us. I was so afraid to leave him there but I couldn’t. I never want to feel like that again-“ 

Merlin’s hand on his head drew him out of the thought, his smile calming the rage that drummed through him at the memory. “You won’t have to, never again. Not if I can help it Harry.” 

Harry couldn’t help but smile back at him. He knew that he meant every single word. 

“Em thank you… this whole day, it was brilliant. Thank you.” 

Merlin laughed and nodded. “Anything for you Harry, even if you are a giant brat.” 

Harry couldn’t help but laugh along with him. As he watched Merlin smile and laugh that night he couldn’t help but hope that his wish this morning would come true. 

He hoped against all hope that Arthur would return once more. 

Chapter Text

“George please tell me you’re here!” Merlin shouted as he waltzed into Weasleys Wizard Wheezes at promptly 10 am on a warm Tuesday morning in the dead of August. 

“I’m awake I’m awake there’s no need to shout!” George yelled from his workshop as he begrudgingly made his way to the front of the store, his robes slightly rumpled as though he’d fallen asleep over his work table. “You realize it’s too early in the morning for this much shouting but since it’s you I suppose I could make for an exception.” George grinned at the sight of the huffing sorcerer as he ran a hand through his messed up hair. Whatever had gotten the raven in a mood was worth seeing the man all flustered. 

Merlin rolled his eyes at the flirt before grinning his eyes lighting up with an idea. 

“Uh oh what’s going on in that tricky little head of yours?” George asked as he eyed the man up and down. 

Merlin strutted over to the counter, his elbows falling on its edge as he propped himself over the table. He joined his hands and gently rested his chin on them. His eyes wide and innocent as he pouted for the red headed wizard. “George, you see… I need your help.” He could play a damsel when the need called for it. 

George eyed the boy for a moment his smirk downright cutting as he gazed at the lovely picture he painted. “Is that so? And what exactly can a dashing young jokesman like me do for a pretty little thing like you.” 

Merlin blushed, unable to help himself. He had always been a sucker for a compliment and George had a natural confidence and charm even he wasn’t impervious to. 

“Now that’s a pretty little blush, I bet I could make you red all over with just a few more sweet words. What do you need beautiful?” George continued as he looked the sorcerer up and down. Merlin swallowed, he was clearly in over his head like usual. 

“Well you see umm would you by any chance be willing to protect me-“ Merlin began. 

“For you darling I’d even battle a dragon.” George promised his voice low as he looked Merlin dead in the eye. The red head was staring at him so intently that Merlin felt hypnotized. 

“How about from Hermione?” He asked suddenly. George’s face went from charismatic to horrified almost immediately and Merlin couldn’t help but to laugh before composing himself and going back to begging for help. “Please George she’s driving me up the wall. She’s adamant about making me write my NEWTS and I just don’t want to. I mean I know I need them to work as a healer but I don’t really need to do that do I?” Merlin ranted in a flurry as George stepped back from the force of the panic. 

“Of course not! I mean you could come work for me? We can design all sorts of spells and enchantments and then I can properly pay you for your contributions.” George offered causing Merlin to grin. 

“I like helping you George. Spending time with you, working on projects and helping round the store, it’s fun. But Hermione won’t buy it she’s even more stubborn than Harry.” Merlin complained just as the door flew open. 

“Oh ‘Em there you are! I’ve been looking all over for you! I’ve picked up all the books that’s you’ll need and now we can devise a study plan-“ Hermione spiralled in a cyclone of organized chaos. 

“Study plan? What the hell do I need a study plan for?” Merlin exclaimed, his mind boggled at the concept. 

“This is an extremely difficult test you can’t expect to pass it without even trying to study!” Hermione ranted as she dropped the books on the counter. 

“Hermione I could take the exams with my eyes closed and still bloody well pass!” Merlin complained loudly. 

“I recon they’re not that easy mate.” George interjected. 

“Not the point, I don’t even know if I want to do all this Hermione, I mean can’t we just take this a little slower?” Merlin asked hoping a change of tactic would yield a better result. 

“You’re not made of molasses and I’m not taking any excuses the test is only held for adults once a year and I’ve already signed you up-“

“You signed me up!? Hermione you don’t think you should maybe oh I don’t know? Ask me first?!” Merlin’s arms flailed as he promptly lost his mind. 

“If I’d asked you then you’d just have put it off again and it only comes once a year!” Hermione objected, her mind made up that she was going to make him write this exam no matter what.

“What’s the matter with that?! I mean it’s not like I’m going anywhere!” He shouted back, uncaring if it was causing a scene. 

“So you can spend all year thinking of more excuses to avoid this? Absolutely not! You’re a brilliant healer and you’re wasting away at home-“ Hermione ranted like a woman possessed. All month she’s heard excuse after excuse from Merlin about trying to re-enter the profession and she was sick of it. If he wanted to avoid this then he was going to have to get through her to try. 

“I’m not wasting away I’m taking things slowly! I mean there’s nothing wrong with taking my time and I’ve only just moved back to London!” Merlin argued hoping against all hope that the witch would relent. 

“Mate you’ve been here for 6 months and we can barely get you out of the house.” George interjected much to Merlin’s horror and Hermione’s joy. 

“Oh come on you’re supposed to be on my side!” Merlin exclaimed. 

“No I’m on the side of doing what’s best for you and this hermitage of yours is not good for you.” George argued, his eyes pinning Merlin in place. “You my friend are afraid of putting yourself out there and nothing good can come from that.” 

“Em we’re not trying to be harsh with you. You know I would never try to upset you-“ Hermione added, her eyes pleading. 

“I know that Hermione, I do I just-“ Merlin began. 

“Mate trust us on this one. I mean if you don’t want to write the test of be a healer than don’t-“

“Absolutely not that’s not an option-“ Hermione interjected but George continued barreling ahead. 

“But you have to leave the house. Pick a job or an apprenticeship, something at least. Hell I meant what I said, come work for me if you want to?” He offered once again much to Hermione’s annoyance. 

Merlin sighed as he looked back between the two. “You’ve really signed me up to write it?” He asked. 

“That’s right. November 2nd to be exact.” Hermione boasted with pride. 

Merlin met George’s eye and saw the same determination in his gaze as Hermione’s and sighed. He knew when he was out matched. 

“I guess I’ll write it then-“ he accepted defeat as Hermione screamed in delight.  She immediately pulled Merlin into a tight hug. He couldn’t help but smile as he hugged her, to think she’d fight so hard for him was sweet no matter how much she frustrated him. 

“Oh I knew you’d come around! I’m telling you that this is a good thing! I’ve already spoken to the head healer and she’s agreed to let you write the healers qualification exams based on your NEWTS and my recommendation-“

“Wait what?! Hermione all I said was that I’d write the exam-“ Merlin felt like he was moments away from spiralling again but nothing he said was permeating through to Hermione. 

“-I’m sure you’ll do swimmingly I mean you’re brilliant and I’m sure you’ll pass we just need to make sure you’re studied up and of course I can help you with that. With any luck you’ll be employed with St. Mungo’s by Christmas!”  Hermione was so excited by the prospect that even George was a little disturbed. 

Merlin turned to the red head, his eyes wide and hopeful as he practically begged for his help. 

“Oh alright alright, ‘Mione what the hell is all the rush? I mean getting him to write the NEWTS is one thing but don’t you think this is taking things a bit too far? I mean Em do you even want to become a healer?” He asked, we he returned his attention to the sorcerer. 

Before he could answer Hermione jumped in. “George you don’t understand! He’s already trained as a healer and he’s brilliant I mean we talk shop 24/7 and there’s not a single time he’s out of his depth. I mean think about how much good he could do! How many people he could help?” Hermione rambled hoping her brother in law would see her side and help her convince Merlin. 

“How about all the people I could let down, the mistakes I could make? Never mind that I’d be working in a hospital with all those people, patients, healers, staff members? I mean what if they all hate me? Have you thought of that?” Merlin knew he wasn’t making a single good point but damn it he was the one freaking out here. He’d spent hundreds of years with nothing but books to keep him company and now Hermione was trying to throw him into the proverbial deep end against his wishes. 

George pinned Merlin with a look that only made him more nervous but he was in too deep at this point to look back. “Maybe I’m just not ready for all of this?” He offered pathetically. 

“Mer- Em’ you can’t be afraid for the rest of your life? I mean what kind of a life is that?” Hermione asked softly but Merlin couldn’t meet her eye, instead he focused on the shop windows and all the witch’s and wizards living their lives beyond the shops door. 

George sighed as he reached up to tilt Merlin’s chin back to meet his eyes. When his bright blue eyes looked back at him, fear still colouring their vision the red head just smiled gently back at him. “I don’t blame you for being scared. The world’s a scary place but you deserve more out of life than this darling.” 

Merlin couldn’t tear his eyes away from George in that moment even if he tried. “What if it’s a disaster?” 

“Then I’ll swoop right in and save the day.” He offered as though it was the most obvious thing in the world and Merlin could admit that he just about melted. 

“You promise?” He flirted right back completely unable to help himself in playing this game. 

George leaned down, his elbows on the table so he could look Merlin dead in the eye with that charismatic smirk “You have my word beautiful.” 

“I think I might actually throw up.” Hermione interjected causing both boys to startle and laugh. “Honestly I don’t know how you two can act like that in public-“ 

“Hey that’s the power of love-“ George happily supplied to which Hermione smacked the man as Merlin laughed. 

“Yeah right honestly George, now would you mind keeping these books for us? Em’ would you come with me to the apothecary I wanted to pick your brain on a few ingredients!”  Hermione asked as she was already ushering Merlin out the door. 

“My shops not a storage unit you know!” He exclaimed as she walked out the door paying the red head no mind. 

Merlin could only shake his head as he laughed at their antics. “Honestly Hermione, do you really need help with ingredients?” 

“Of course not but watching you two flirt is disturbing. What is the deal with the two of you exactly?” She demanded her eyes searching as she caught Merlin’s gaze and once again Merlin was reminded of Gwen and her innate ability to see right through him. Merlin laughed as he scratched the back of his head, unsure of how to respond. 

“I’m not sure really, I mean he’s handsome I can’t deny that but we’re just friends. I don’t want to screw that up, and I know he’s got a girl he’s interested in. To be honest it’s just nice, the flirting is fun and I can’t deny it’s a bit of a confidence boost, you know?” Merlin tried to explain as best he could. He could admit he was attracted to the other man but he wasn’t willing to throw away their friendship for a passing fancy. 

Hermione didn’t seem to buy it for a second as her gaze remained locked on his. “You know for someone who lectures Harry so much about taking chances you’re pretty staunch against taking any of your own.” 

Merlin couldn’t help but feel like a gutted fish at the witches assessment. “I suppose you’re not wrong.” 

Hermione sighed as she linked her arm with Merlin and continued to make their way to the apothecary, enjoying the relative peace of the early morning before the crowds of Witches and Wizards would descend on the shops in search of items for the upcoming school year. 

“I know that it’s hard and I swear I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable. I’m just worried about you that’s all.” She admitted her eyes purposely ahead of them as she admitted what was really on her mind. 

Merlin sighed as he forced himself to really consider what she was saying rather than just getting defensive. Even he had to admit he had a tendency to anger first and think later and lord knows that wasn’t helping anyone. 

“I’m sorry Hermione I just… it’s tougher than I thought it would be. I didn’t think it would be so hard to reintegrate, readjust. A part of me doesn’t want to-“ 

“But why? I mean I think that’s the part that I can’t seem to understand. You’ve told us so many stories of the lives you’ve lived the careers you’ve had. Hell I don’t think even I can keep track of all the lovers you’ve had-“

“Alright alright I don’t think there’s been all that many relatively speaking-“ Merlin attempted to defend himself to which the witch rolled her eyes. 

“That’s not the point you dolt. This fear of yours, it’s clearly only affected you recently and I… I don’t want you to be afraid Em. I mean you’re not alone, even if you do agree to work at St. Mungo’s I’ll be right there I swear!” Hermione was pleading with him and as he looked into her big brown eyes he knew he couldn’t keep fighting her. Somewhere along the way he’d come to love her and Ron as much as he did Harry and he couldn’t stand to see her beg. He was always a soft touch, Arthur had pointed it out to him more than enough times after all. 

“You’re asking me to trust your judgment over my own.” Merlin noted to which Hermione nodded. 

“Is that so hard to believe?” Hermione asked gently. Merlin sighed, his mind filled with thoughts of the one man who he had always trusted above even himself. 

“There haven’t been many people I’ve allowed to get close enough to trust Hermione.” The sorcerer admitted. 

Hermione stopped walking for a moment and turning to look at Merlin. His mind clearly lost in thought. “Em’ I … I’m sure it’s not my place to ask-“

“I hate when you say things like that. It makes me feel like there’s a wall between us and I hate that-“ Merlin admitted.

“Oh I don’t want there to be any walls between us either Em’ but I don’t want to upset you!” Hermione quickly assured him making the raven smile. 

“I’m a grown man Hermione I promise I’ve got thicker skin than that.” Merlin reminded as the witch rolled her eyes. 

“I care about you and I don’t want to risk hurting you at all!” She happily chastised making Merlin laugh. 

“Okay well I’m giving you permission to stop tip toeing so do your worst.” He offered knowing full well he was granting Hermione permission to butcher him where he stood. 

The witch watched him for a second before making an executive decision to pull him into the closest cafe and herd him to a secluded table before casting a myriad of spells to ensure no one could eavesdrop on their conversation. 

“Is this a tea worthy conversation?” Merlin joked as Hermione rolled her eyes. A pot of tea levitated towards them with cups following closely behind. 

“I want an honest answer out of you, why are you fighting us all on this whole return to normalcy thing? I mean it’s been months and you’re finally coming to social events but anything outside of that you just reject!” Hermione ranted as Merlin poured them both a piping hot cup of tea. 

He knew he’d have to have this discussion sooner or later with her. He and Harry had always had an understanding when it came to this topic. Probably because he and Harry were far too alike when it came to their general need to avoid people after all the pain they had suffered. Avoidance was the name of their game and while they understood that and each other it wasn’t always easy to try and explain such things to other people. Doing so usually ended in pitying looks that neither man was fond of. 

He sighed as he looked at Hermione sitting across from him and decided he might as well just tell her the truth and see what would happen. 

“You’re not going to like what I have to say.” He warned to which she rolled her eyes. 

“Well if I’d have liked it you wouldn’t be hiding it now would you?” She argued in return. 

“I suppose.” He began before picking up his cup and taking a sip, the earl grey a soothing comfort. “Harry told you what Death said to him didn’t he?” 

Hermione’s eyes widened as she nodded. The memory had played on repeat in her mind almost constantly as she grew to care for the man in front of her. How could it not. “She said you’d lost the will to live.” She replied to which he nodded. “But Em that-“ 

“It’s not a recent development Hermione.” The words stopped the witch in her tracks. 

“What do you-“ she began but the sad smile Merlin graced her with was enough to break her heart. 

“The day I lost Arthur it was like the light in my soul went out.” Merlin admitted, his eyes fixed on the cloudy contents of his cup and not on the witch in front of him. 

“Merlin-“ She began but he just shook his head until his eyes met hers again. 

“I don’t know how to explain it ‘Mione. When he was there I could feel it. Every emotion I could have I had. No matter how scared I was or how bad things were I knew he was there and deep down I just knew it would be okay. I swore I’d protect him or die alongside him… I never even once considered what would become of me once I’d lost him. At first I just kept pushing forward and waited for his return, pretending that he’d be back before long and that everything would be fine. Until I couldn’t pretend anymore.” The admission was downright draining as he took another sip of his tea until he was brave enough to look Hermione. She looked about as heartbroken as he felt as she reached over to squeeze his hand in support. 

“You loved him didn’t you?” She finally asked, the question pulling a smile from him, he couldn’t help it. 

“With every fibre of my very being. The great dragon always said we were two sides of the same coin. But as the years have gone on I like to think of him as the sun and I … nothing can truly survive without the sun and yet I do. I have no choice.” Merlin explained as best he could but the truth was there were no real words to describe the depths of his feelings for Arthur or the grief that he couldn’t shake since his passing. “No matter how hard I try, the truth is that all my attempts at a life even before this were hollow. I’ve never… the burning need, the determination, the ambitions are all dulled. A empty mockery of what I once felt. Everything just seems so pointless…” 

All of a sudden Hermione understood why the hell Harry was so adamant about giving Merlin space. Hermione was trying the heal a wound that couldn’t be healed at all. In that moment as she watched the exhaustion that seemed to permeate Merlin’s very being she felt entirely powerless to help him. 

“Em I … I wish I could-“

“Bring him back?” Merlin teased, his eyes locked onto hers. “You wouldn’t be the first one to make such a proposition.”

“Who else-“ Hermione began but Merlin’s gaze fell to the streets outside the cafe and the children running around probably excited for their coming year at Hogwarts. “Your son?” 

Merlin smiled and nodded back at her. “Leon was a good kid but my god did he worry about me. When I first told him about who I was it was a shock. I mean most kids don’t wake up one morning to find their father is Merlin himself. But once the shock wore off he was so adamant about finding a way to complete the prophecy.” Merlin recounted his heart clenching as he thought about his little boy. His life, his happiness had been one of the greatest joys of Merlin’s existence and there wasn’t a day that went by that he didn’t miss him. 

“Was he? I mean did he find anything that would help?” Hermione couldn’t help but ask, a part of her knowing she was about to go down a rabbit hole researching this prophecy no matter how much she detested divination. 

Merlin smiled back at her at the question. Her thirst for knowledge was unquenchable and he always respected a witch that wasn’t afraid to take a chance. 

“Nothing that I didn’t already know. He’ll return when Albion needs him most and so far I guess nothings been enough to bring about his return. If the recent wars weren’t enough then to be honest I don’t know what is.” Merlin admitted sadly, he has spent millennia waiting, hoping against all hope that his time had come but without any luck. 

“I hate these stupid prophecy’s. I really really do I mean can’t they atleast try to be more clear?!” Hermione complained making Merlin laugh once again. 

“I’ll be sure to file an official complaint with the soothsayers for you. I’m sure they have a suggestion box somewhere.” He teased as Hermione huffed and glared. 

“All I’m saying is that they’ve given us no information to go off!” 

Merlin smiled “I think that’s the point. We’re not meant to get involved with matters of fate. And yet we’re all forced to participate.” Merlin added bitterly. 

“Is that why you don’t want to return to wizarding life? You’re refusing to participle?” Hermione suddenly asked causing Merlin’s eyes to widen in shock before he sighed and nodded. 

“Call it silly if you want but I’ve begged and pleaded with the power that be for something, anything. I’ve not gotten a damn response and so, as petty as it might be I’ve decided to take myself off the chess board.” The sorcerer didn’t care if it seemed silly to fight against fate the way that he was but to him it felt just. Why should he have to keep participating when he was clearly getting the shit end of whatever deal this was. 

Hermione sighed as she drank her tea. She took a moment to mull over everything the sorcerer said and she couldn’t blame him for his frustrations. The weight of this destiny was cruel no matter which way you looked at it. 

“I don’t blame you for it Em. I can’t. But the only person you’re hurting here is yourself. You’re still human and we’re social creatures at our core. And while I can’t argue that this whole situation is anything but cruel I don’t think avoiding life is helping you.” Hermione argued, her mind set on the fact that she would not let this go. 

“You mean you won’t just let me rot in peace?” Merlin asked sarcastically to which Hermione rolled her eyes. 

“Not a chance! You’re writing the NEWTS then you’re becoming a healer again, and don’t you dare try to weasel your way out of it I know for a fact that you’re passionate about the profession. I see the way your eyes light up every time we have a discussion about it so yes that’s exactly what we’re going to do! And who knows maybe somewhere down the line you’ll even accept that I’m always right and see that this was the best idea!” 

Merlin laughed as Hermione ranted before finally raising both hands in surrender. “Alright alright if my sob story isn’t going to work this time then fine. Just don’t blame me for it if I’m terrible at this whole mess and manage to screw this up somehow.” 

Hermione rolled her eyes “Ron and Harry are my best friends. My plans are usually idiot proof thank you very much.” 

Merlin couldn’t help but to laugh at that and Hermione couldn’t help but join him. 

—-

Later that night Merlin walked through the floo and all but collapsed on the couch. 

“Look what the cat dragged in. I hope you’re hungry because I’m making curry.” Harry shouted from the kitchen before making his way to the sorcerer. 

Merlin sat up and looked at him before checking his watch. “What are you doing home so early? I thought you were staying late tonight?” 

Harry had the decency to look ashamed for once so Merlin was sure that whatever the reason this was going to be good. “Oh Circe what in the world did you do?”

“I got sent home by the head Auror.” Harry admitted looking every bit like a kicked puppy. 

“Why?” Merlin asked happily. 

“Cause I broke Auror Jenkins nose.” He finally admitted as he sat down on the couch. 

“Shut the fuck up, seriously? And I thought I had a crazy day, what the hell did you do that for?” Merlin couldn’t believe his damn ears. 

“I’m my defence he deserved it! I mean first me and Ron have to pair up with him and his partner for a raid.” Harry explains. 

“These are the older set of Aurors that you don’t get on with?” Merlin asked. 

“Yeah the ones who hate us even though we’re always cleaning up their ruddy messes. They needed more manpower on their raid so we go to lend a hand. But what happens when we’re about to capture the wizards? Mr. Hotshot decided to run into active fire because he is in a rush to make the arrests himself and he gets his entire arm sliced open from shoulder to fingertip.” Harry describes much to Merlin’s horror. He couldn’t believe the stupidity of this man. 

“He’s lucky to be alive what if they’d gotten his neck instead?” Merlin considered as Harry nodded. 

“That’s what I said. Luckily we managed to capture the lot of them but I got stuck taking Jenkins to St. Mungo’s. We get there and guess who’s the best healer on shift?” Harry asks. 

“Well Hermione was with me all day so I’m guessing Draco?” Merlin offered. 

“Ding ding ding we’ve got a winner.” Harry sounded off with the dramatics of a performer in the west end. 

“So what, did he hit on him or something?” Merlin hazarded a guess but Harry just shook his head. 

“Worse he refused to let him treat him. Said that he’d die of an infection before he let a death eater touch him. I told him to cut the crap but he started going on and on about how Draco should be locked up in Azkaban. Next thing I know we’re arguing back and forth as Draco’s trying to calm me down-“ Harry rambled. 

“Please tell me you didn’t attack someone who was already injured.” Merlin groaned as he pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“He called me a fucking traitor Em! Me! He said I was a fucking disgrace to the Potter name!” Harry erupted. 

“Okay well now I feel less bad for him. What the hell is wrong with this guy?” Merlin knew he wasn’t exactly the authority on the post war political landscape but even he knew comments like that were taking things way too far.

“Hell if I know. A different healer finally came to heal his injuries and Draco dragged me to his office to rip my head off while he healed my knuckles-“ Harry complained. 

“How hard did you hit the man?! For Circes sake Harry-“ Merlin pinched his nose in frustration. Hitting him was one thing but the man was already injured for goodness sake. 

“I believe they said I shattered his nose-“ Harry happily relayed only to be cut off by a pointed glare from Merlin. 

“Not something you should be proud of you ass! How pissed was your boss?”

Harry sighed, his hand running through his hair in exasperation. “Downright furious at the whole lot of us. St. Mungos put in a formal complaint about our conduct. Me for attacking a patient and him for abusing a member of their staff. Lucky for me Jenkins got the brunt’s of his anger but he suspended us both for the next two weeks.” 

Merlin shook his head, Harry really did have a knack for getting himself into all sorts of trouble whenever he was given half an opportunity to do so. It was like the boy went out of his way to create chaos in his own life. 

“Honestly Harry that temper of yours never ceases to amaze me. So now what do we do with you? I mean you’ve got two weeks off we might as well take advantage of it.” Merlin offered as Harry grinned. 

“See that? That’s exactly why I love you. How would you feel about going to my cottage in Scotland? I mean it’s summer we can take Teddy with us and see if Hermione and Ron want to join us at some point?” Harry supplied like an excited puppy who was just offered the opportunity to go on a walk. 

“Uh oh nope not unless Hermione promises not to drive me up the wall about those damn exams!” Merlin huffed as Harry laughed. 

“Driving you mental is she? Once she’s made up her mind she’s like a locomotive on a war path-“ Harry agreed. 

“She talked to the head healer about me already Harry! The head healer! All I said to her was that I missed helping people and then bam were off to the bloody races!” Merlin complained causing Harry to laugh harder. 

“Yeah mate you’re better off just giving up and letting her have her way. Fighting her on anything is a loosing game. Trust me.” 

Merlin groaned as he collapsed on the couch before grabbing a throw pillow and screaming into it. Harry smiled and tried not to laugh. 

“Oh come on it’s not that bad I mean it’s not like it’ll be hard for you to pass? Just write it and then we’ll deal with all the other stuff.” Harry offered as Merlin finally dropped the pillow and sighed. 

“Alright fine but I’m not going to pretend to be happy about it.” Merlin argued 

“Please don’t you’re a terrible liar.” Harry joked as Merlin threw a pillow at him. “What that’s a compliment if you think about it!” 

Merlin groaned before collapsing on the couch once again. All of his friends were completely insane, just his luck. 

Chapter Text

Merlin had been a little apprehensive about taking a trip to Scotland but even he had to admit that this was probably one of the best ideas Harry had ever had. 

Harry and Merlin had picked up Teddy from Andromeda the very next day after Harry’s suspension. The older witch had been less than impressed with Harry’s conduct, apparently she’d gotten a very long call from her sister on the matter and had dug into Harry the second he walked through the floo. 

Teddy and Merlin had spent majority of the visit trying not to laugh as Andromeda lectured the boy who lived about what was and wasn’t acceptable behaviour in polite society.  The green eyed boy looked less like an all powerful wizard and more like a properly chastised toddler by the time they said goodbye to the witch. 

Harry’s cottage is Scotland was downright stunning. It bordered on a lush forest and there are mountains as far as the eye can see. There was even a beautiful lake not far from the home that they could walk to whenever they pleased. The cottage itself looked like a sweet little hunters cottage on the outside but within it was a beautiful home made of wooden architecture and decorated in deep reds and earth tones. There was a cozy den, a state of the art kitchen and multiple rooms all looking as comfortable as the others. 

Harry and Teddy were clearly proud of the space. Teddy had demanded that he be the one to give Merlin a tour and he’d spent ages telling him all of his favourite memories on the property. 

Even Kreacher who had kicked up quite the fuss about having to leave Grimmauld Place even temporarily seemed to be more at ease here. 

The boys had spent the last two days enjoying the warm summer days playing in the water and going on all sorts of adventures in the woods. But the nights were easily Merlin’s favourite. 

Every night they would cook together, the sound of the enchanted radio compelling them to sing and dance and laugh as the prepared dinner. Then as the exhaustion from the day set in sometimes they would play games like wizard chess and other times Merlin would read to Teddy or tell him old stories about Camelot. Teddy was absolutely obsessed with the stories of adventure and his enthusiasm was like a healing balm for Merlin. 

More often than not the boy would fall asleep as Harry and Merlin talked or watched tv with Teddy tucked in next to one of them, his soft snoring making them realize the boy had knocked out as the days activities caught up with him. 

It was on their third day in highlands that Teddy insisted that they go on another adventure through the woods. The boy had clearly been inspired by the bed time stories much to Merlin’s amusement. 

“And a proper one this time Harry! I don’t just want to go into the tree line I want to go really really deep!” He pleaded as his sceptical godfather plated him a heaping portion of bacon and eggs. 

“Kiddo the wood in this area are filled with magical creatures. We have to be a bit more careful then-“ 

“I can be careful! I swear I can! Please Harry pleaseeeeeee?” Teddy begged, his eyes big as he pouted like the child he was. 

Merlin chuckled as he made his way to the table, a tray of freshly made french toast in hand. 

“I don’t see the harm in it Harry if we’re there with him.” Merlin offered as Teddy cheered at the support. 

“See? Martin trusts me!” Teddy cheered as Harry rolls his eyes. 

“Hes a soft touch and you know it. Teddy you can’t run off the way you usually do while we’re in the forest. You’d have to stay with us all the time-“ Harry warned as he levelled Teddy with a look only a skeptical parent could effectively generate.  

“I will I swear I will, I’ll even hold your hand I promise!” The boy folded his hands and begged with everything he had before finally his godfather sighed. 

“Alright fine but if you run off even once I’m grounding you-“

“I won’t I promise!” He begged until Harry finally agreed. Merlin couldn’t help but chuckle the boy clearly got his sense of adventure from his godfather much to Harry’s ever growing concern. 

Teddy for his part looked like he was about to pop with excitement as he shovelled down his breakfast at preternatural speeds. The moment he was done eating he ran up to his room to prepare for the days activities. 

Merlin smirked at Harry as the green eyed boy rolled his eyes. “You can’t blame him for taking after you, you know? I mean he talks about all your adventures at Hogwarts constantly.” Merlin chuckled. 

“I know I know. Tonks and Remus were just as bad and clearly the boy wants to carry on the Marauders name but I can’t help but to worry.” The wizard admitted, his eyes falling on a picture of a much younger Teddy that was hanging on the wall. 

Merlin nodded as he smiled at the picture in question. In it Harry had Teddy in his arms, the boy was just a toddler when it was taken but in the photo he had turned his hair black probably to match his god father. In it Teddy looked every bit like he was Harry’s son. 

“I know it’s scary. I mean when Leon was old enough to go to Hogwarts I was practically beside myself. I cried like a baby the day he boarded the train and then wrote to him daily until I was sure he was fitting in.” Merlin offered, the memory bringing a soft smile to his face. 

“So I should get used to it?” Harry groaned, he was sure he was also going to cry like a baby seeing the boy off to Hogwarts. Thankfully he still had a year before he had to do that. 

“Afraid so. The worry never really goes away no matter how old they get.” Merlin added with a sigh. 

“Hearing that coming from you does make me feel better.” The wizard admitted making Merlin smile.

Before long they found themselves entering the forest with a vague idea of which paths they planned to take for their adventure. Harry had given Teddy an old map of the surrounding forest he’d received when he’d purchased the home which marked a nearby waterfall that the boy was adamant about finding. 

Harry had made sure to pack enough snacks and drinks in their packs to last them for weeks. Merlin had snickered at him the entire time because clearly Harry knew how to be cautious only when it involved his kid. 

As they walked into the forest Merlin couldn’t help but smile. Here surrounded by  nature he could feel the hum of the earth, the shivering of the trees, the call of the animals within and the magic with which it all existed. 

“Em what are you doing? You’re falling behind!” Teddy complained as he let go of Harry’s hand and ran back towards Merlin. 

He smiled as the boy reached for his hand, finally calming once Merlin was looking back at him. 

“Can you feel the magic?” Merlin asked the boy. A look of confusion passed on his face making Merlin chuckle. He reached up to cover his eyes and said “It’s easier when you can’t see. Do you feel the vibrations from the earth, the wind, the trees?” He asked gently. He watched as the boys face twisted and strained before suddenly it went lax in wonder. 

“I-I do! It’s like…”

“Like music?” Merlin offered as the boy nodded. 

“Is that really magic?” He asked as he looked up at the man in wonder. 

Merlin smiled brightly back at him and nodded. “You see Teddy our world is full of magic. It’s woven into the very fabric of this universe if you just know how to look.” He explained gently. 

“Woooow.” The boy said and he looked up at Merlin in wonder. 

“Come on you two, it’s too early for a break!” Harry prompted as Merlin and Teddy shared a look and continued making their way towards him. Teddys hand staying secure in Merlin’s as they continued to walk. 

As the day went on Merlin couldn’t help but be reminded of his younger years spent in the forests of Ealdor and Camelot. 

The forests here were ripe with flora and fauna that were extremely rare, and wherever Merlin turned his gaze he would see something that stood out to him. Teddy, realizing that Merlin was basically a well of knowledge asked question after question in the way only children can. His curiosity was all the incentive Merlin had needed and he loved showing Teddy the beauty of the magical world, the natural world. 

If this meant Harry got an unsolicited herbology lesson then so be it even he couldn’t complain as he saw the joy and wonder on their faces. 

“Em look it’s a pixie!” Teddy screeched causing the little pixie to try and hide behind a tree. 

Merlin watched the creature for a moment before realizing its wing was injured. He put his finger to his lips and Harry and Teddy froze as he reached out to the pixie, extending his hand for a moment to see if she would allow him close. 

To both the wizards surprise the pixie slowly emerged from behind the tree and took a seat on Merlin’s outstretched palm. He smiled as he brought her closer to him, his other hand resting gently against her wings. His eyes flashed gold as he healed her injury, the pixie didn’t hesitate to whiz around his head in joy, trying to communicate her thanks. 

“It’s no trouble but be careful in the future little one.” He replied as she bowed in thanks and then flew circles around Harry and Teddy before flying deeper into the forest. 

“That was amazing! Em you’re so cool!” Teddy gushed as he ran over and threw himself into Merlin’s arms. 

Merlin laughed as he hugged the boy. “It’s the least I can do. See Teddy if you take care of others and use your magic for good then the magic will take care of you.” 

“You make it sound so simple.” Harry commented his smile soft as he watched the absolute joy on both of their faces. 

“It’s us that make it complicated Harry. But magic is and has always been very simple, it is like any of the other elements and can be used in many ways but it is us who use it for an intention. Those intentions are what effect us all for better or worse. Not the magic itself.” 

As the light shone through the branches and fell on Merlin, Harry couldn’t help but remember that Merlin too was a creature of magic. Here in the light of the forest he truly looked eternal and otherworldly.

“The magic, it feels nice here.” Teddy added, his eyes once again closed as he tried to feel the life of the world around him the way Merlin had taught him. It felt like the forest around him was gentle and at peace and he wished he could feel like that forever. 

Harry smiled as his hand fell on the boys head. He couldn’t help but to agree with him, after all this forest was the reason he spent so many years here. He felt at home here. 

The sound of a whisper took him out of his thoughts, he gazed into the bushes around him knowing that he’d heard a familiar sound. His voice whispering a greeting in parseltongue. 

Merlin and Teddy grinned at each other as they heard Harry speak in the serpents language. They both loved when Harry used it and often made a game out of who’d be able to convince him to use it first. 

Before long a serpent appeared, reaching for Harry’s outstretched hand and slowly slithering up his arm until she was comfortably wrapped around his wrist. The two exchanged a few more pleasantries before Harry turned to his companions. 

“Guys this is Nadine, she’s an old friend and she’d like to say hello.” Harry explained as the snake raised his body to hiss before bowing is greeting. 

Teddy quickly went to the snake to say his hello and delighted in watching Harry translate between them. Merlin couldn’t help but to laugh as the little snake agreed to join them on their travels to the waterfall so that they wouldn’t get lost along the way. 

It took almost two hours for them to reach their destination but once they heard the rushing of water Teddy practically pulled Merlin’s arm out of its socket rushing towards it. 

Teddy gasped as he broke through the edge of the forest. The waterfall was beautiful as as it spilled over a mountain ledge into a deep basin that was surrounded by forest. 

Merlin and Harry couldn’t help but grin as they stood back and watched the joy on Teddys face. The waterfall seemed to practically shimmer with magic, there were water sprites swimming just below its depths and more pixies fluttering through the trees by the waters edge. Harry smiled as he reached down to gently place Nadine on the waters edge. She hissed her thanks before slithering below the surface. 

Teddy ran towards the water intending to jump in but Merlin caught him before he got the chance. He turned to argue but saw Merlin once again telling him to stay silent, his eyes trained across the basin. There less  then 100 yards away was a family of unicorns staring curiously back at them. 

Merlin patted Teddy on the shoulder, a silent gesture to ensure he didn’t make any sudden movements before making his way to the unicorns. 

His eyes flashed gold once again as he gently bowed to them. The largest one neighed before cautiously making his way to Merlin. 

Harry couldn’t believe his eyes, unicorns never approached wizards and they were easily frightened but here they were slowly walking towards Merlin. 

Merlin smiled as the larger unicorn nudged his cheek with its snout. He huffed until Merlin began to gently pet him his eyes locked with the creature as he expressed his joy at seeing it. 

Harry could practically feel the magic in the air shiver as though pleased and a sudden thought occurred to him. Merlin was happy to be there and it seemed the earth was happy that he was there. In all his years living in the forests he’d never seen such a thing and yet here it was right in front of him. 

Merlin greeted each of the unicorns before turning to Teddy and waving him over. The poor boy looked downright nervous as he very slowly made his way to Merlin. 

“Would you like to say hello?” He asked as the boy finally came up next to him. He took Teddys hand in his and raised it to the unicorn to scent before allowing Teddy to gently pet him. Slowly he stepped back and allowed Teddy to interact with the creature alone and before long he was softly nudging his snout against Teddy’s cheek as the boy giggled. 

Before long all three of the unicorns were coming over to them and demanding that they be pet, touched and scratched. Harry smiled as the baby unicorn licked his arm as he scratched him behind the ears. 

Eventually, the largest unicorn began to neigh and all three left to reenter the forest as Teddy excitedly waved his goodby before turning back to the two men. 

“That was AWESOME!” He exclaimed as he ran towards Harry and into his arms as then adults laughed. 

“I think we can call today’s adventure a success don’t you?” Harry asked as Teddy nodded. 

“I can’t wait to tell gram and all my friends! They’re not going to believe it! Did you see how the baby let me hug him?” Teddy raved as Merlin smiled before crouching down next to him. 

“It’s because you have a pure heart.” He explained as Teddy hung on his every word. “You see unicorns are very pure creatures and anyone who would ever hurt them will suffer a terrible curse-“ 

“But why would anyone want to hurt them?” He asked innocently, his head quirked like the adorable puppy he was. 

Merlin sighed, his eyes finding Harry’s as the man crouched down in front of them as well. 

“Kiddo there’s always good and bad people in this world and people are easily corrupted by power. Unicorns are very very powerful magical creatures and so some people try to hurt them to use them for their own gain.” Harry explained as best he could. He hating seeing Teddy have to know of such darkness but a part of him felt it necessary to tell Teddy the truth. After all if he didn’t who would?

“That’s terrible! We can’t let people do that!” He exclaimed suddenly causing Merlin to smile. 

“And we won’t, that’s why witch’s and wizards like Harry fight against the dark arts.” Merlin explained and Teddy couldn’t help but look at Harry and nod, relieved knowing his god father was on the job. 

Harry couldn’t help but stare pointedly at Merlin as he snickered. Harry was always so uncomfortable when it came to acknowledging his own abilities and accomplishments never mind hearing them come from someone else. 

Teddy spent the rest of the day talking about the unicorns and everything he saw on their adventure. As the night came to an end and Merlin was settling in on the couch with another book to read Teddy climbed up in the couch next to him and said. “Do you think one day people will talk about our adventures like they do king Arthur’s and the knights?” 

Merlin smiled and nodded, his hand falling on Teddys head to ruffle his hair. “Of course they will, after all you’re destined for great things Teddy.” 

The boys smile for the rest of the night could light up the room.  

Chapter Text

Merlin couldn’t believe how quickly time passed these days. Between Hermione’s downright unhinged study plans, helping George around the shop while Lee was out of town and managing his ever chaotic social life he was exhausted. 

Somewhere along the way the summer had bled into the fall and you could practically feel the shift of the season in the air. By all accounts everything was going exactly as it should have been and yet there was an ever growing dread in Merlin’s chest. 

Tomorrow was the anniversary of his son’s death. He had it marked on the calendar and as the day had grown closer and closer so had the ever present cloud of grief grown stronger. 

He’d nearly confessed the occasion to Harry about a hundred times but he didn’t have the heart to tell him. He was afraid that if he told him Harry would be adamant about spending the day with him, taking care of him, watching over him. 

A part of Merlin wanted to let him. Wanted to be honest and forthcoming but every time he willed himself to talk to him he felt his throat close up as though someone had grabbed him by the neck to strangle him into silence. 

He couldn’t get the words out no matter how much he tried and instead he found himself telling Harry that he should spend the weekend at Ron and Hermione’s. 

It was the perfect excuse. He’d been working on a big case with Ron all month. A disturbing string of magically linked murders with all signs pointing to human sacrifice but with no evidence as to why. 

Harry had all but begged him to join them in trying to make sense of the mystery but Merlin had remained adamant that he needed to stay home and monitor a potion he was working on. He knew it was a lie and Harry looked less then convinced. It had taken him assuring the man he’d see him on Sunday for their usual brunch at the burrow for him to finally let it go. 

Harry was suspicious that something was up but none of that mattered to Merlin at that exact moment. 

The night before the anniversary he couldn’t help but to feel untethered. He spent all night holed up in his room surrounded with albums. He’d brought them from his home months ago and all of them were filled to the brim with his sketches and memories. 

He drank an entire bottle of whisky before finally gathering the courage to open one. It was his beloved book for Leon. 

He opened the book and there smiling back at him was a sketch of Leon, Merlin and his parents Elizabeth and Jacob. 

They were all laughing in the sketch and cooing over Leon. Merlin remembered the day well, he couldn’t believe it when they named him the godfather but it should have been expected given that he’d been the one to set up the young couple. 

Merlin had loved them both, they were kind and companionate in so many ways. They had been his closest friends and their death had always haunted Merlin. They were both so young when a tragic horse carriage accident took their lives and left their dear son orphaned. 

As he continued to flip the pages, each image reminded him of a memory. Leon’s first birthday, his first steps, his first words. Then there was a picture of him holding Leon after his parent’s funeral. The words he wrote on the bottom of the page were his vow to the boys parents. 

I swear I’ll raise him to be every bit the man you would have wanted him to be. 

He had kept that promise. 

As he continued through the album his eyes clouded as he saw his little boy looking back at him. All of the sketches were imbedded with his magic so he could see the boys laughter and his excitement. There were images of him with scraped knees and scratches, but always a look of determination in his eyes. 

Merlin couldn’t help but to cry but he couldn’t stop turning the pages no matter how terrible his heart felt as it was ripped to pieces by the memories. 

Page by page Leon grew older. Every birthday memorialized in extravagant paintings and journal entries remembering each and every single monumental occasion. When he got to the painting marking his first year at Hogwarts Merlin couldn’t help but to sob. 

Page by page he watching his little boy grow into a honourable man. There were sketches of his graduation from Hogwarts and then of his first day going to work and then his wedding day. 

There were so many sketches of him and his wonderful wife. The home they shared, a wedding gift from Merlin had been so beloved by them both. Then there were pictures of the family that they raised, the children that they loved so dearly, they had called Merlin grandpa and by god did he love them. 

As the pages passed between his fingertips the portraits reflected the slow and steady passage of time. His son aged the way that all men do and soon he grew from the strong and unshakable man he was to the wise grandfather he too eventually became. 

The last sketch was of his funeral. Merlin had attended under a disguise, his family unable to recognize the young man he portrayed himself to be rather than the grandfather they had once loved and long thought dead. 

His own grandson had greeted him like the stranger he seemed to be and Merlin realized in that moment that this life was too painful to bear for even a second longer.  

He had spent the funeral in a daze, his mind unwilling to accept that all of a sudden he was alone once again. 

The word alone had echoed through his mind over and over again as he watched his family comfort each other for their loss and he was forced to stand back like the outsider he was, unable to join them. Unable to even ask for the comfort of his loved ones in his time of need. How could he when he was a stranger to them?

Was this truly a life worth living?

That question had eaten away at him day after day and night after night. For months he couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, he could barely think. After a millennia of forcing himself to keep going, hoping against all hope that Arthur would return he found himself realizing that he couldn’t wait anymore. 

His destiny was to be by Arthur’s side and so that’s where he would go. 

He lost track of how many times he tried to take his own life after that. 

Every day marked a different attempt, he would bleed himself dry in the hopes that it would stop his heart but it never did. He thought maybe the elements would garner better results but nothing seemed to work, not drowning himself in lake Avalon, not burning himself with dragon fire, no potion or poison effective in stopping his life. 

The only effect they had was making him experience unimaginable and excruciating pain. He had always hated pain, had suffered so much of it early on in life that he became a healer so no one else would ever suffer from it again. 

Despite that he couldn’t stop. All he wanted was to be wherever they were. Wherever Leon was, wherever Arthur was surly waiting for him beyond the veil. 

Before long he realized his efforts were all in vain. The only thing they taught him was that he was doomed to live and that the only thing he could control was the pain. 

Somewhere along the way he had gone from dreading it to craving it. The blood rushing in his veins, the sharpness of every cut, the blistering of every burn, the only reminders he had to prove that he was in fact still alive. 

Eventually he used a spell to summon Death herself and then he had begged. He begged and pleaded with her to take him beyond the veil. To return him to his loved ones, to grant him peace once and for all. 

She told him time and time again there was nothing she could do. His fate required him to wait and he had no choice but to accept that. 

Her departure led to him walking into lake Avalon once again. He had tried to weigh himself down with magic and remembered hoping that it had worked as he felt his lungs fill with water but instead he woke on the shores still alive and at a loss as to how. 

He’d given up trying after that. He couldn’t do it anymore. He didn’t even know how long he spent laying on the shores of the lake waiting for his life to pass him by. Day in and day out he couldn’t move. It didn’t matter how desperately hungry he was or how lonely he felt. 

The weight of his grief felt so insurmountable. 

It was his house elves that eventually found him. He’d made a habit of rescuing abused house elves from wizards over the years and offering them a home in his house in what was once Ealdor. 

The house he’d raised his son in. The house he dreaded returning to now that the sound of his laughter would forever be missing from its corridors. 

It was Mitzy that had finally found him. She had been with him for over a 50 years and had cried out at the very sight of him. 

She had begged and pleaded that he return home so she and the elves could care for him but he’d refused. 

She was the one who returned to Avalon day in and day out. Who forced him to leave its shores, who made the tower hospitable enough for him to live, who forced him to eat and bathe and care for himself again. 

He hadn’t wanted to. Not really. But he was a soft touch and seeing her upset had forced his hand and so he tried. 

And he’d kept trying to do the bare minimum until Harry had found him. 

Merlin didn’t sleep a wink all night. Instead he lost himself in the pages of his other albums. Each depicting the lives he had lived, the memories he had, the people he’d come to love and ultimately lost. 

He worked his way backwards through them until he made it to the very first one. The reason he had learned to draw and sketch, the very first people whose memories he was most desperate to preserve. 

He could see the sunlight streaming in through the window as a new day dawned and it felt fitting that he would end his efforts of self sabotage in memory lane with the cause of all of his suffering. His first life. His true life. 

He opened the first page with a heavy heart knowing exactly who he would be seeing looking back at him. 

His mother was the first person he wanted to preserve and there she was smiling up at him. And there standing opposite to her was Arthur. 

He began to sob as he clutched the book to his chest while the guilt finally took him over the edge. He knew his mother would be furious with him if she saw him like this and lord knows he’d never be able to face Arthur if he knew of the pathetic mess he’d become. 

Yet he couldn’t stop crying as his mind played the truth over and over and over again in his head. 

I wish I was with you. I wish I could be with you. 

He couldn’t stop the sobbing now that it had started and yet he wouldn’t put down the book. 

Every page he turns there were the faces of his loved ones staring back at him. Gaius’ usual scowl, Gwen’s kind gaze, Lances gentle smile, Gwaines smirk. Percy, Elyan, and Leon all grinning back at him as though they were happy to finally see him again. 

Freya he had painted in a beautiful dress as she danced under the moonlight. 

And then there was Morgana. He had painted her as he most liked to remember her, soft, gentle, kind and compassionate. She was smiling back at him as she held a bouquet of Lily’s in her arms. 

He was close to hyperventilating as he stared down at her portrait, his tears clouding his vision as he tore himself to pieces for what she became. What he had done to her. 

He was the reason she had suffered her fate. He was the reason she died. He was the reason Arthur died. 

Maybe that was the reason why he still lived. It was punishment for all of his sins and now he was doomed to be without them forever more. 

He cried out as his mind replayed every mistake he’d ever made, every bad decision he’d taken and all of the pain he caused until he craved to euphoria of escape. 

He didn’t remember making his way to the bathroom, his magic swirling the albums and the faces of everyone he loved around him like a tornado of his own design. 

The ice cold of the bath wasn’t enough, the pins and needles of the water unable to dull the chaos of his mind. He didn’t remember breaking the mirror but when his magic pulled a shard of glass to his hand he was thankful for the searing pain that came from clutching it in his palm. 

The blood running down his hand was a welcome sight but it wasn’t nearly enough. He didn’t hesitate to dig the shard of glass into his wrist deep enough for him to unwittingly scream but it still wasn’t enough, it was never truly enough. But the deeper he cut, the farther he dragged the shard against his skin the more his mind clouded over. 

Finally the euphoria he had been waiting for. Atleast like this, the blood on his skin and the searing pain in his body, he knew he was alive. 

He didn’t stop cutting. Not when his hand began to shake, not when he could barely hold the shard any more, not even when his vision started to blur. He continued cutting again and again and again until his vision finally faded to black and he hoped, that maybe this time he’d finally not wake again. 

——-

If there was one thing Harry had truly come to loath in this world it was the feeling of helplessness that came with watching the people he loved suffer. Especially when he was helpless and unable to save them. 

He had hated it when he could not save himself from the Dursleys. He had hated it more when he saw his friends suffer at the hands of Voldemort and the war. 

But this was beyond anything he could have imagined. 

“Harry he’s going to be fine.” Hermione assured him from her place next to Merlin on his bed. He seemed so peaceful now that he was tucked into his bed but Harry couldn’t stop replaying the events of the last couple of days in his mind. 

He knew something was off about Merlin. He fucking knew that there was something he wasn’t telling him, something that was bothering him. Eating away at him. 

He’d tried everything to get him to open up. He’d been with him every moment that he could. Hell he’d practically begged to stay with him this weekend but every time Merlin had just smiled and waved off his concerns. 

A part of him had hoped that he just needed time. That eventually Merlin would come find him the way that he always did when something was wrong. That they’d talk and maybe shout or cry or whatever but they’d find a way to heal, to work through whatever this was together. 

When Kreacher suddenly appeared in Hermione and Ron’s kitchen begging for him to help Emrys he had panicked. They had left Kreacher to watch the kids and hurried to find the sorcerer. 

The moment they opened that bathroom door Harry had frozen in fear. He could barely remember what happen, there was so much yelling and shouting. Hermione was screaming directions at them as she tried to heal his wounds. Ron was swearing up and down, unable to comprehend the scene he’d walked into and Harry was like a deer in headlights. 

It was like he was under water. Like none of this was real, like this was all just a sick nightmare that he hadn’t woken up from yet. 

It was Hermione’s shouting that pulled him out of the shock. Somehow between them they were able to clean and dress his injuries before dressing him and moving him into the bed. It had been hours since then and now they were just left to wait in the hopes that he’d wake before long. 

“He’s lost a lot of blood and he needs to wake up before we can give him the replenishing potion but he’ll be okay once he wakes.” Hermione had said the same thing about 6 times now but neither of the boys had the heart to tell her. Ron was collapsed on a chair next to the bed, his head in his hands while Harry continued to pace along the length of the room again and again. 

“I just don’t understand. I just don’t understand why he would-“ Ron mumbled as he looked up and back at Merlin his eyes watering. To think that he’d been in so much pain that he would do this to himself and they were completely unaware was terrifying. 

“I knew something was wrong. I knew something was wrong. He wouldn’t tell me and I … god damn it why didn’t I just push him on it? Why didn’t I-“ Harry felt like he was falling apart at the seams. He was the one that brought Merlin here, he was his best friend, he was his family and somehow he’d still let him down. 

“Harry you can’t blame yourself-“ Hermione chastised. 

“I bloody well can Hermione! God damn it I should have been here! I should have stopped him! Instead I was so lost in that stupid case that I fucked this all up!” Harry didn’t even care that he was shouting, or that the house seemed to shake with his rage. “This is all my fault, I should have-“

Merlin stirred, the movement causing them all to freeze as their attention focused on the sorcerer. 

Harry couldn’t stop himself from climbing onto the bed and sitting down across from him hoping against all hope that he’d wake. 

When he finally opened his eyes Harry couldn’t help the tears that fogged his vision. He didn’t even bother trying to hold back as he sprang forward and pulled Merlin into a hug. 

“Harry? What-“ Merlin mumbled, his brain slow to catch up with him as he instinctively pulled Harry close while also trying to sit up. “What’s going on?” He asked, his mind finally picking up on the fact that Ron and Hermione were in the room as well. 

He froze suddenly as the realization set in. The reason they were all here, the reason Harry was crying. 

They had found him. 

“Harry?” He called as he sat up properly, his body exhausted after the blood he lost but he forced himself to push through the pain as he reached for Harry. His fingers curling in his hair as he felt Harry hug him tighter. 

“I thought I’d lost you” He cried as the horror of what he’d put him through dawned him. 

Merlin’s eyes watered as he pulled the boy close so that he could cry now that the panic was finally melting away from him. 

“I’m so sorry” Merlin cried, unable to say anything else. He just repeated apology after apology over and over as Harry cried in his arms. 

He felt Ron’s arms around him as he pulled them in close. He could hear Hermione’s sniffle as she buried her head in his chest and all he could do was apologize over and over and over again. 

He’d never meant for them to find him. He’d never meant for them to see. Not even for a moment had he allowed himself to believe that they would ever find out. He’d worked so hard to keep it from them, he never wanted them to know how desperately he craved death nor how broken he truly was. 

Now there was no turning back. Not only did they know but he had caused them such excruciating pain like the bastard he truly was. He never should have let them become so close to him, not when he would bring them such pain. 

“I want to know why-“ Harry asked suddenly as he finally pulled away from Merlin. His eyes blazing with fury now that he was finally getting some semblance of stability back. 

Ron and Hermione exchanged a look before gesturing for Harry to back away and give Merlin some room. 

“Before that you need a blood replenishment potion and the pain reduction tincture.” Hermione interjected hoping to give everyone a chance to catch their breath before moving on to the more difficult conversation. 

“It’s alright Hermione I don’t need them my magic-“ Merlin began to protest until Ron shut him down. 

“Mate shut the fuck up and drink the potions.” His tone harsher the Merlin he ever known it to be. He froze, his eyes locked on Ron before nodding. 

Hermione brought him the potions and there wasn’t a bone in Merlin’s body that didn’t want to throw them out the window. He didn’t want to get better, he didn’t want the pain to subside. A twisted part of him didn’t want to let go of the only thing that made him feel alive but as he looked at Harry Ron and Hermione he knew he couldn’t put up a fight. 

He drank the potions unwillingly as the voice in the back of his mind continued to protest. 

As he finished drinking the potions he realized that he was terrified of facing them. He didn’t want to explain his actions. He didn’t want to admit to his sickness, he just wanted to run as fast as his legs could carry him and never look back. 

“I shouldn’t have left you here on your own.” Harry’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts.

“I told you to go. I asked you to go.” Merlin immediately reminded, his voice pleading as he watched the self doubt and anger whirl in Harry’s mind. 

“I should have known. Damn it Em I did know! I knew you weren’t okay and I just left you to suffer-“ Merlin’s hand covered his lips before he could say another word. He couldn’t stomach this, he just couldn’t. 

He had made sure Harry was looking at him as he said “You did nothing wrong. You aren’t the reason I… Harry you have to believe me-“ Harry pulled his hand down into his lap and gripped it tight, unwilling to let go of it even for a second. 

“Then why? Why Em, why would you-“ He knew he was begging and he didn’t care, he couldn’t care when all he could see every time he closed his eyes was the blood that painted that bathroom and Merlin’s lifeless body in the tub. 

“I … I just couldn’t do it anymore.” He finally admitted, his voice so small that it was barely a whisper but they all heard it. 

“Merlin you can’t- I … why didn’t you come to us?” Hermione begged as Ron nodded. 

“Mate we want to be here for you, we don’t want you to suffer alone. You know that!” Ron knew he was pleading but he didn’t care.

Merlin nodded “I know. I do know I just-“ he didn’t want to say the words out loud. He didn’t want them to know how fucked up he was or how the noise in his mind never seemed to shut off or how badly he hated himself for all the things that he had done. He didn’t want them to know he was a monster and that he deserved every bit of fucked up pain this life was giving to him. 

“Just what Em? This isn’t even just- you were trying to hurt yourself. You wanted to and I just don’t understand-“ it was Harry’s voice, strained from the pain that finally broke him. He had sworn he would protect him, he had sworn nothing would hurt him and here he was causing him to suffer. 

His hand reached out for Harry’s cheek the way he always did when Harry had a bad day or a terribly dream. The weight a comfort as Harry covered the shaking fingers within his own and held them against his face unwilling to let go. 

“I want the truth, you promised me- you promised me the truth.” Merlin knew he was crying again but he shook his head still terrified to say the words out loud but then Harry was looking at him with those watery green eyes “please?” He begged. 

Merlin couldn’t deny him. He couldn’t. 

“It’s the only way I know I’m real…alive.” He whispered the words but the room fell silent all the same. “The pain is all I … it was just to much and I just- I just wanted it all to stop and the pain …it was all I-“

He was crying again and damn it did he hate that he was. He hated feeling this way, he hated the way his body would tremor and shake as he tried to hold himself together. He didn’t realize when Ron had wrapped his arm around him shoulders but in that moment he felt eternally grateful as his friend held him together. 

“Was it something I said? Is it cause we were talking about-“ Harry began, his spiraling thoughts finally spilling out. 

“No no Harry you did nothing wrong I swear!” He assured. 

“But then why, I know something was wrong I know you were upset-“ Harry begged. 

“That had nothing to do with you I swear-“

“But then why didn’t you tell me!? Why didn’t you come to me? Don’t you know you can trust me-“ Harry begged unable to accept that he had no control of this, that there wasn’t something he could have done differently that would have led to a different result. 

“I wanted to Harry I swear that I did. I tried and I tried but everytime I tried to speak my voice wouldn’t let me. I didn’t want you to know-“ Merlin tried to explain. 

“But what the hell could be so bad? I love you damn it and you know that I do-“ Harry argued unable to stop himself. 

“I know Harry but this?! I couldn’t tell you! I didn’t want you to know, I didn’t want you to carry this weight, it’s mine to bear-“ Merlin knew he was shouting but he couldn’t help but defend himself even when he knew he was in the wrong. 

“So what you just carry it alone and then fall into despair under the weight of it all? Damn it you think I don’t know what it feels like to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders? I’m more then strong enough-“ Harry couldn’t help but fight back, unable to accept that Merlin thought him too weak to share in his pain. Merlin was fighting back tears again but it was a losing battle at this point. 

“That’s not why Harry! I just- damn it I’m just so fucked up and there’s- hic- there’s nothing that can be done. I didn’t want you to know. To see-“ He gasped between sobs as Ron rubbed his back. 

“Mate you have nothing to hide I mean-“ Ron began before Hermione interjected. 

“Ron’s right Merlin, what ever it is we can at least try to help- we’re your friends we don’t want you to be alone, to suffer alone any more-“ She could feel her own eyes water again as she saw Merlin nod. She didn’t hesitate to pull him in so he could cry on her shoulder. 

Harry was shaking as he sat cross legged on the bed, his eyes finding Ron’s in the chaos. Ron nodded gently, the gesture a familiar one, a reminder to stay calm, one they used so often over the years. He tried to breath, waiting as Hermione managed to get Merlin to calm enough to speak. He knew his anger wasn’t helping anyone but he couldn’t help the way he felt. He couldn’t. Not at that exact moment anyways.  

“Can you… can you tell us what caused this?” Hermione asked gently, her healer training overcoming the fear as she told herself that knowing the trigger was pivotal in situations like this. 

Merlin nodded, his hand reaching out as two albums flew to him, the first one he had opened and the last. Merlin handed Hermione his son’s book. The other he kept in his lap, the weight comforting, a reminder that he hadn’t entirely lost those he loved. At least he had these sketch’s, these memories. 

“Today… it’s the anniversary of my son’s death.” He explained as Hermione opened the album. 

“Merlin these are … they’re beautiful.” 

Merlin smiled through the tears at that, he couldn’t help it. 

“Mate I’m so sorry, but why the hell didn’t you tell us?” Ron asked as gently as he could while he tried to remain calm and steady. Someone had to after all. 

Merlin shrugged his eyes vacant suddenly. “I … he’s gone. They all are and I… it feels wrong to impose… this is my fate, my curse.”

“No, fuck you!” Harry said suddenly drawing all three sets of eyes on him. 

“Harry-“ Hermione began. 

“No absolutely not, we’re not doing this! We have a agreement, no lies, no secrets I don’t give a fuck-“ Harry wasn’t even sure why he was being so combative in that moment but he couldn’t stop the rage that seemed to erupt every time he heard Merlin’s half assed excuses. He could have prevented this. He knew he could have if Merlin had only let him. 

“Mate maybe now’s not the time to lose it?” Ron interjected not that Harry was listening. 

“No just no! You don’t get to do shit like this Em. You should have told me! You should have told me and the only reason you didn’t was what? You thought I’d hate you? You think you’re too broken? That’s what you said isn’t it? That you’re too broken and fucked up and mangled or what ever other shit-“

“Harry please-“ Merlin said softly, hoping against all hope he’d calm down but instead that seemed to just cause him to anger more. 

“Too fucking bad! I don’t give a damn how broken you think you fucking are Em. I don’t. You’re my best friend for fucks sake. I don’t give a fuck how broken you think you are I fucking love you!” He shouted. 

“Harry let’s just take a breath-“ Hermione tried to interject but there was no stopping Harry once he was on the war path. 

“No no fucking way! So that he can stick his head in the sand and try to avoid it all again? So that he can go back to pretending that he’s okay when he’s clearly fucking not?” Harry hit the nail on the head as he argued with Hermione. That was exactly what the sorcerer had been hoping for. 

“Well no. No thanks. I’m good, I’d rather all his fucked up shit be on the table. I’d rather know it all cause you know what Merlin? I don’t care if your broken, I don’t care if your cursed, I don’t care if your a prince or a pauper, a monster or even a fucking god. You’re Merlin and you’re my friend and I get to be fucking there for you. I get to be with you while you mourn. I get to sit with you in your grief, I get to wipe your tears away. I signed up for this damn it and you don’t- you don’t get to protect me from this you asshole.” 

Harry knew that last line was a low blow. He knew it as he said it, he knew it when he saw the look in Merlin’s eyes. He knew it when he saw the looks on his friends faces but at that exact fucking second he couldn’t give a damn. 

Merlin winched, he couldn’t help it. Harry was right he knew that he was and that’s what made this so much fucking worse. 

It was the silence that followed that struck him. No one said a fucking word as Harry’s statement rang through the air. 

Harry ran a shaking hand through his hair, his fingers pulling at the follicles in a last ditch attempt to calm himself. 

Ron sighed, his arm still secure around Merlin as he pulled him tight. When Merlin finally met his eye he felt a semblance of relief pass over him. At least now his eyes didn’t look as vacant as before. 

“You know we love you don’t you?” He asked gently. 

Merlin nodded as another tear fell from his eye. Ron reached out to wipe it away. 

“Promise me you’ll come to us next time then. But no more blood okay? It freaks me the hell out.” Ron couldn’t describe the relief he felt watching Merlin smile up softly back at him again as he nodded his agreement. 

“I’ll try … I am sorry I… I would never want to put you through this.” Merlin admitted as he pulled his knees to his chest, his arms wrapping around them to make himself smaller. 

Before Harry could speak Hermione quickly cut him off. “We don’t doubt that Merlin, we know how much you care about all of us. But this is different. You shouldn’t have to face this alone, it’s keeping these secrets that’s going to drive you mad with guilt.” 

She was right of course. He knew that his mind couldn’t be trusted, as far as he was concerned he thought he deserved nothing but pain and so that’s what he gave into.

Hermione sighed as she noticed the exhaustion that seemed to weigh the sorcerer down. She could only imagine the damage he’d been causing to his psyche over the past centuries. 

The self harm she’d witnessed was likely nothing in comparison to the torture he’d subjected himself to psychologically. 

“Em’ when you have minds like ours … they’re sometimes like a weapon. And when you’re your own worst critic… well it’s like your tearing yourself to pieces. What I’m saying is that maybe you need a bit of help learning to put the sword down?” Hermione offered so gently that Merlin couldn’t bear to argue. 

“I don’t know how to …” he admitted, his arms wrapping around the album almost instinctively. 

“How about we start there first?” Harry suggested, his finger pointing towards the album in his hand. He hadn’t even noticed that Harry had been flipping through the other while he spoke to their friends.  

Merlin clutched the book tightly. He’d never shown it to anyone before. Not a single soul, not even Leon and the idea of sharing it made him feel stripped, vulnerable in a way he never wanted to be. 

“Can I see it?” Ron asked gently, his hand outstretched in front of Merlin. He swallowed, his eyes looking up at Ron’s, pleading that he reconsider, Hermione tried to intervene but Harry’s hand on her arm stopped her. 

Merlin waited a moment and then another hoping one of them would crack but they all waited with bated breath. 

“Please?” Ron asked gently and finally Merlin relented and placed the book in his outstretched hand. 

Harry sighed as he got off the bed and made his way to the headboard and crawled onto the bed to sit next to Ron. Hermione quickly joined and took a seat next to Merlin, her arm wrapping around his arm as she rested her head on his shoulder. 

Merlin held his breath as Ron opened the book, and there was his mother’s eyes looking back at him. 

“Em who is she?” Harry asked gently, noticing the way Merlin was focused on the page. 

“My mum.” He said finally, with a wave of his hand the sketch came to life as she smiled up at him. 

“Shes beautiful Merlin, what was her name?” Hermione asked as she rubbed his arm, he smiled sadly at Hermione and nodded. 

“She was wasn’t she. Her name was Hunith. God she was a saint I don’t know how she managed to put up with me.” He joked said softly, but it fell flat under the weight of the circumstances. God what he wouldn’t give to see her again. 

“You must have been a naughty kid I can practically see it now.” Ron joked in return causing Merlin to smile softly again. The red head couldn’t help but be pleased, he’d give anything to see the sorcerer smile like he usually did. 

“Like you wouldn’t believe. Magic was outlawed but I was terrible about hiding it. I was always getting into trouble, it’s why she sent me to Camelot.” Merlin explained, his eyes naturally gravitating to Arthur’s portrait next. He was dressed in his chainmail and armour looking as every bit as regal as a sketch could as he stared off at a distance in the portrait. 

“That’s Arthur isn’t it?” Hermione asked. Merlin nodded without looking away from the page once. As he waved his hand the picture came to life and the side profile moved forward as Arthur looked up at him and smirked. Looking every bit as handsome as he did arrogant and noble. 

“You weren’t kidding he is hot.” Harry noted making Merlin roll his eyes. 

“He was aware. Lord knows his head was big enough cause of all the compliments.” Merlin couldn’t help but smile at the thought as he looked down at him, unwilling to turn the page. 

“If he was here what do you think he would say” Ron asked gently, Merlin froze his gaze stopped on Arthur.

“Probably that I’m an idiot.” Merlin offered his eyes unmoving from his portrait. 

“Can I turn the page?” Ron asked gently hoping against all hope that Merlin would finally look away from the image. He nodded but didn’t make a move to look away. Hermione reached over slowly flipping to the next page. 

As they turned the page there was Guias, his usual scowl in place. As Merlin waved his hand the figure seemed to only scowl further. The action making Merlin smile. 

“This is?” Hermione coaxed. 

“Guias. My teacher, my mentor, my second father. He taught me everything I knew. He cared for me when I arrived in Camelot and never stopped caring for me.” Merlin explained his voice tight. 

“And this?” Harry asked as he pointed to the next painting. 

Merlin smiled through fresh tears as he waved his hand and Gwen smiled brightly up at him. “Guinevere”. 

He was silent for a moment as he watched her. Her death had broken him in a way that never truly healed. She was the last of his old friends to pass and that was the first time he’d ever found himself alone in this world. 

“She was my best friend, even after Arthur… I served on her court, I stood by her side and when the time came I was there at her bedside… I miss her so damn much-“ Merlin couldn’t help the sob that erupted out of him. Harry didn’t hesitate to crawl onto the bed and pull the book from his hands before pulling Merlin into his arms. He held him as he cried, as he grieved, as he felt the pain from the loss and this time he wouldn’t have to suffer alone. It didn’t matter how angry he was he would never let Merlin suffer alone. Never again. 

True to their word his friends didn’t leave him for a second. They spent the evening going through the album together page after page memory after memory until Ron and Hermione finally left for home.  

As the night came to an end and Harry prepared for bed he couldn’t stop his mind from worrying. Eventually he dressed in his robe and made his way down the hall before opening Merlin’s door. 

The sorcerer was still sat up in his bed his mind still going a mile a minute. He smiled softly at Harry. “You didn’t have to come check on me again.” He joked but Harry just rolled his eyes. 

“Not why I’m here, slide over.” He stood expectantly as he gestured for Merlin to move out the way. Once he did Harry lifted the blanket and lay down to sleep. 

“Seriously?” Merlin asked as he eyed the boy sceptically. 

“Fuck off and go to sleep… I’m still mad at you by the way.” Harry grumbled as Merlin chuckled. He leaned over the ruffle Harry’s hair as the man huffed like a child. 

“I am sorry you know.” Merlin says as he reaches for Harry’s glasses, gently removing them from his face to fold and place on the nightstand. 

“I know…don’t scare me like that again.” Harry doesn’t ask, he’s not willing to hear Merlin’s answer if he had posed it as a question. 

Merlin sighs before nodding. “Not if I can help it.” 

Harry sighs, that’ll have to do… at least for now. 

Chapter Text

Harry had never considered himself to be a clingy person by any means. His few relationships had taught him that he was fairly independent. He wasn’t sure if that was a result of the loneliness he’d come to associate with his early childhood but it’s who he was. Or so he thought until now. 

“Harry you’re driving me up the wall! I mean you have a job and a case and a life! You can’t be popping home every couple of hours to check on me!” Merlin argued as he paced the length of his potions lab grumbling about the pain in the ass Harry was being. 

Logically Harry knew he was right. He knew he couldn’t keep doing this. 

It had been a month since the bathtub incident as Harry had now began to think of it. One month since he thought he was about to lose his best friend and Harry wasn’t handling it well to say the least. 

All month Harry couldn’t stop his mind from playing through what happen over and over again. At first he couldn’t help but stick close to Merlin. He’d check in with him every morning and again every night. He’d spend forever asking incessant questions until he was sure he knew where Merlin’s head was at. 

Hell, he even managed to talk Merlin into spending his days studying at the shop with George when he had to go to work just so he’d have a bit more peace of mind. He had also tried to do as much work from home as he could so that he and Merlin could spend the days together. 

At first Merlin didn’t bother trying to put up a fight. Even he knew that these were the consequences of his own actions and escaping them wouldn’t really help anyone. 

Truth be told Harry’s company had been a relief at first, his depressive thoughts were far less prominent when the wizard was there with him. Between his friends support and the myriad of books on the subject Hermione had forced him to read he could admit that he was doing better then he was even a few weeks ago. So he chose to keep trusting his friends and their judgment. 

That had lasted about 3 weeks. A long and difficult three weeks where by the end of it Harry was damn near driving him crazy. But still he accepted that this was necessary for Harry to help him process what had happen. He had tried so damn hard to be mindful of his friends feelings but damn it he was going crazy.  

For Pete’s sake the man had popped in to check on him 3 times today and it wasn’t even 2:00pm yet! And that wasn’t even counting the letters.

“So what I’m not allowed to worry? How the hell can you even ask me that? I’m allowed to-“ Harry immediately began to argue. 

“For the love of all that is holy I know! I’m not saying you shouldn’t worry about me I’m saying you can’t be up my ass every 10 minutes!” Merlin retorted. 

“What if something happens?” Harry countered. 

“Nothings going to happen! Or have you forgotten that I’m basically immortal?!” Merlin knew that this was a stupid argument to be having but when you’ve had the same argument with your friend a hundred different times sometimes things just take an unhinged turn. 

“And yet you still find inventive ways to torture yourself!” Harry clapped back with 0 consideration for whether that was necessary in the circumstances. 

“For the love of- HARRY I’M FINE FOR FUCKS SAKE!” Merlin shouted but Harry just kept shaking his head from his place near the hearth. 

“Yeah but what if you’re not? Then what? I mean what if I’m in the field or in a meeting and you need me and I’m not here-“ Harry was now pacing back and forth like a mad man. 

“Mate you’re being completely insane! I know this has been a lot. I know you’re worried about me, I know that you’re right to worry but I swear to you I am going to be okay!” Merlin pleaded as he approached Harry. 

The wizard sighed as he raked a hand through his already unkempt hair. He sighed, he had to get back to the ministry he knew he didn’t have time to be doing this. 

“I just… I can’t seem to put my mind at ease-“ Harry tried to explain. 

Merlin shook his head before making his way to the wizard whose eyes were trained on the ground, shame, guilt and fear practically exuding from him. 

Merlin hated seeing him like this. It was painful to see the usually confident and fearless man weighed down by the pain he himself had caused him.  

He reached for his cheek and his green eyes finally lifted to meet his. 

“I hate that I’ve done this to you.” The sorcerer offered. Harry smiled softly back at him. 

“I don’t. I’m still mad at you but … I’d rather know. I meant what I said, I just wish it was easier to check in and keep an eye on you that’s all. I don’t like the idea of you not being able to come to me when you might need me.” Harry offered as Merlin shook his head. 

“Harry you idiot I can always come to you-“

“But what if I’m in the field?” Harry argued immediately. 

“You fool I can always contact you, or have you forgotten already?” He asked sarcastically as he grabbed Harry’s wrist and lifted his hand. His ring shining in the light from the fireplace. 

Harry had entirely forgotten why he even had the ring in the first place. His eyes widened. 

“You’ll use it to call for me?” Harry begged. 

Merlin sighed as he nodded. “Yes yes and if I’m in any real danger it’ll let you know-“

“Can you change it? Can you make it tell me when you’re injured or in pain?” Harry suddenly demanded. 

Merlin stared at him for a moment unsure if he should. The truth was that he could, the rings were forged by him, it wouldn’t take much to add to their configuration but that meant he couldn’t harm himself again without Harry becoming aware. 

“You can can’t you?” Harry asked desperately. 

Merlin took one look at those hopeful green eyes and sighed. He took his ring off and then Harry’s, his eyes lighting up with the flow of his magic as he whispered the spell and changed the rings as Harry had asked. 

“There. Done. Now go off and save the world and leave me to my potions already.” Merlin grumbled as he handed Harry his ring. The moment he put it back on he pulled Merlin in for a hug. 

“You’re the best. Alright I’ll be off!” He exclaimed before turning back to the hearth ready to floo back to the ministry. 

“And don’t come back till nightfall!” Merlin shouted as Harry walked back through the flames. 

——

True to his word Harry did not pop back in to check on Merlin. 

Instead he was left to spend the next few hours going through every minute piece of evidence he had compiled on this case with Ron. 

“Mate we’ve gone through this all a hundred times. I mean we know that there’s some sort of summoning circle drawn on the site of the murders. We know they’re sacrificing blood. We know at-least some of that blood is human and we know they’re damn good at erasing their tracks.” Ron reminded as he poured over their office trying to see if something, anything stood out to them. 

“It’s the summoning circle that’s got me stumped Ron. I mean summonings have been illegal for hundreds of years, all of the books on it are confiscated so how could they have even learned to do them?” Harry wondered as he stared at the small piece of the summoning circle they had found that wasn’t completely destroyed. 

Hermione and Merlin had both taken a look and the piece they had was just too small for either of them to conclusively say what was being summoned. 

Needless to say both men were at a loss and now they were sure there was no less than three victims. 

Three unidentifiable victims whose remains they were desperate locate, to name and return to their loved ones so they could be laid to rest. 

Harry and Ron sat in their office in silence trying to rack their brains and find what was missing when a knock on the door pulled them from their thoughts. 

“Did you boys forget that you don’t actually live here in the ministry?” Draco asked from the doorway where he and Hermione were waiting expectedly. 

Ron shot up from his chair almost immediately as he checked the clock on the wall. The was nearly 8:00 and he hadn’t even realized. 

“I’m sorry dear, time just got away from me.” He said with a chuckle as he walked to his wife. Hermione rolled he eyes before leaning up to kiss his lips softly and taking her hand in his. 

“Come on then, let’s not keep the kids waiting a second longer.” She teased as Ron flushed red. 

“Alright I’ll see you tomorrow Harry. Bye Malfoy!” He greeted as they left. 

Draco gave a half hearted wave before turning his gaze to Harry, his grey eyes calculating as he took in his once rival. 

Harry couldn’t help but smirk as he raised a hand, his robe flying to him effortlessly. He dressed as he walked to the door to meet Draco. His hand falling to his waist as he kissed his cheek softly. He smiled as he felt Draco shiver under his touch. 

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Harry asked, the smirk on his face speaking for itself. Draco rolled his eyes, he couldn’t help it. Something about Harry’s charisma had always driven him mad and he never knew whether to fight or melt in his presence. 

“Well since you’ve been neglecting me I thought I’d just come see you myself.” He taunted, especially pleased as he watched Harry’s eyes narrow at the comment. 

“You and I both know you’ve been just as busy as I’ve been.” He noted, to which Draco just waved him off. 

“No idea what you’re talking about scar head this is all your fault entirely and you have to make it up to me.” Draco demanded. 

Harry chuckled. “I suppose you’re right. Now how exactly would you like me to make it up to you?” He asked as he pulled Draco against him, delighting in the feel of his body against him. 

Draco looked back at him pointedly for a moment before making up his mind. “Tell me what’s going on? I know something is wrong and I don’t like being kept in the dark Potter.” 

Harry sighed, he knew Draco would ask eventually but he had been hoping to avoid the conversation. 

“It’s … it’s not really my story to tell. Martin’s not been doing so well and we’ve … we’ve been trying to keep a close eye on him.” Harry offered, his mind once again running through everything that happen. 

Draco sighed as he watched the shadow cross Harry’s face. He knew that look all too well. “You can’t run around playing the hero forever Harry. You can’t save everyone. Especially from themselves.” 

Draco’s arms crossed as his mind turned to  the dark mark that remained hidden under his robes. The lesson it taught him was always at the front of his mind. If you wanted to survive then you had to save yourself. No one else can save you especially from your own choices. 

“I hate it. I hate every fucking part of it I… I wish I could save him from this. From his pain, from his grief, from himself. All of it.” His voice was wavering, his frustration bleeding through. 

Draco sighed and shook his head at the stubborn fool. “You always love playing the hero. Did it ever occur to you that that’s not what he needs at this exact moment?” 

Harry’s eyes met Draco’s instantly. “Then what does he need?”

Draco rolled his eyes. “I don’t know, you’re his friend I’m sure he must of told you something or another?”

Harry looked like a kicked puppy, his eyes pointedly looking off to the side much to Draco’s amusement. “He told me to stop driving him up the wall and to leave him to his potion making… He also said I wasn’t even allowed to come home till night time.” 

Draco laughed, he couldn’t help himself and the utter betrayal on Harry’s face made it so much funnier. “Oh come on, you look like he went and kicked your owl or something.”

Harry continued to pout much to Draco’s utmost pleasure. He smiled softly to himself before reaching up to kiss him gently, the boys face relaxed almost immediately. 

“Come on Potter I’ve got a surprise for you that ought to cheer you up.” The blonde said with a smirk as he held up a mirror. “It’s a portkey.”

Harry smiled and reached for the mirror, allowing it to transport them away from the ministry. 

He gasped as he looked around to see that they were in a beautiful rose garden surrounded by fairy lights. The gardens were lush and in its centre there was a beautiful picnic laid out before them. A candlelight picnic. 

In the distance he could see an opulent cottage that sat in the middle of what seemed to be endless grounds. Off in the distance he could see fields and farms but one thing was obvious, they were the only ones here. 

Harry smiled as he turned to a blushing Draco. “You did all this for me didn’t you?” 

The blonde looked entirely unwilling to respond. He was looking off in the distance his nose pointed to the air as though he was entirely too proud to ever take responsibility for such a thing. 

“Draco?” Harry asked, clearly amused by the boys avoidance. He stretched out his arm towards the other wizards and he boy glared while walking towards his outstretched hand. Harry didn’t hesitate to pull him close the second he was within reach. 

Draco rolled his eyes and huffed as he looked up at an extremely pleased Harry who was still waiting patiently for his answer. 

He sighed as he felt Harry’s firm grip on his waist and finally replied. “You’ve been upset for weeks and I had to cheer you up somehow.” He was complaining as though it was the most annoying thing he’d ever seen but even he was doing a terrible job of masking his concern. “So I thought I’d give you a night away from it all.” Draco said while looking at the ground unwilling to face Harry given the admission. 

Harry smiled, how could he not when Draco was going through all this trouble just to make him feel better. 

The last few months, while being extremely taxing had also been a blessing when it came to his relationship with Draco. 

Not that either men had defined the relationship, instead choosing to simply agree that they were exclusive and leave it at that. 

The titles had always felt so heavy and while Draco would never admit it he feared that he wasn’t ready to come out publicly about his relationship. At least not yet, not while things felt so new and delicate.  

Despite that the men were both damn near insatiable in their need to be with one another but their lives left little free time for them to indulge in each others company.

There was also the fact that Draco had yet to tell his parents. And with the blonde still living at the manor and his parents being none the wiser about their son’s new paramour they had to be careful not to accidentally out themselves sooner then they planned. 

So that meant them going on the occasional date to dinner or drinks sporadically under the guise of a public friendship rather then the burning passion the were currently nursing. 

And that was before the events of the past month where they barely had a second to themselves. 

Harry watched Draco for a moment, his elegant features practically glowing under the soft light of the moon. He knew he could spend a lifetime watching the blonde and never tire of him once. 

He gently led Draco to take a seat on the lovely cushions the blonde had prepared on top of a blanket. He didn’t hesitate to pull Draco into his lap, unwilling to separate from him for even a second. Draco practically melted against his chest as he nuzzled into Harry’s throat. 

“I’ve missed you.” Draco whispered. Harry grinned, pulling back so he could look into Draco’s eyes. 

“I’ve missed you too. I’m sorry we haven’t been able to spend more time together.”

Draco gave him a tiny smile. “It’s okay …especially if you keep sending me letters.” 

Harry laughed, he couldn’t help it, the letters had started out as an apology for upsetting Draco during the whole Jenkins mess and had continued on through the months. They had quickly become the highlight of their days and they both couldn’t get enough. 

“You know you got me in hot water with your letter on Tuesday. I nearly choked on my coffee.” Harry teased his eyes unwilling to leave Draco’s. 

“I had a long night at the hospital and thought it a shame I didn’t come home to you in my bed.  Am I wrong for telling you that?” Draco grinned at him like he was especially proud of himself. 

Harry’s eyes narrowed at the sly minx. “How about all the things you said about what you wanted to do to me if I was?” 

Draco shrugged as he pointedly looked away from Harry. “I thought that was entirely inconsequential.”

Harry smiled to himself before blowing on Draco’s neck, the man shivered and turned back to glare at the auror. “What? It was inconsequential.” 

Draco rolled his eyes. He turned back to their picnic and raised his wand and casting multiple spells so that their food would begin to serve itself. Harry didn’t hesitate to reach out for the champagne glasses that were levitating towards him. 

He handed one to Draco as the bottle filled one glass after the other. 

“To an evening just for us?” Harry asked, the clink of his ring against a glass a small reminder that everything was just fine. 

“To us.” Draco agreed as the gently clanked the glasses. 

“So where exactly are we? Not that I’m complaining I mean this is … it’s nice.” Harry offered his eyes tracking Draco’s every movement and expression. 

He pretended to play coy as he drank his champagne, his own eyes focused on the roses. He shivered as a crisp breeze passed them, the early October air reminding them that autumn had arrived. 

Harry pulled Draco in even closer as he cast an wandless heating charm while Draco shivered under the touch of his magic. 

“It’s my mother’s country estate. She inherited it from her parents and we used to spend summers here often.” His voice fond as he thought about all the memories he’d made here. “This garden was where I first learned to fly.”

Harry smiled as he thought about the boy he once knew Draco to be. He could almost imagine it as though he’d been there. 

“I can’t say I’m surprised. Do you remember when you challenged me? It clearly wasn’t your first time on a broom.” Harry teased. 

Draco rolled his eyes, how could he forget. “I meant to get you in trouble and managed to secure you a spot on the house team! I was furious, I think I spent all summer complaining to mother and father about how unfair the whole thing was.”

Harry couldn’t help but to laugh. “Is that why Lucius got you onto the team?” 

Draco blushed at the memory. “He said he’d do just about anything to get me to stop talking about you constantly.”

“Did it work?” Harry teased. 

“Obviously not! I mean you were such a pain you can’t expect me not to complain-“Draco argued as Harry continued to chuckle. 

“No wonder he wanted me out of the picture so badly.” He joined only to be met by a seething glare. 

“Don’t even joke about that-“ 

“If I didn’t know any better Malfoy I’d think that you were worried about me.” He joked sarcastically. 

“Really? The moonlit picnic wasn’t indication enough?” Draco pouted. 

Harry smiled as he reached for the boys chin, forcing the blonde to look into his eyes.  “I’ll never get tired of hearing it.” 

Draco narrowed his eyes as the green eyed wizard smiled happily back at him and waited. The blonde sighed, his hand falling on Harry’s chest before he reached over to kiss his lips gently. “I can’t help but worry about you scar head.” He said softly and then let his head fall back on Harry’s shoulder. 

Harry smiled into his hair and kissed his head as he allowed himself to just enjoy the moment. He loved the feeling of having Draco in his arms. The weight of his head on his shoulder, the heat that permeated from him, the sound of his gentle breathing, all of it put him at ease. 

When he was with him it felt like the weight of the world didn’t sit on his shoulders. Instead he could simply exist and all felt well. 

He didn’t want to let him go, not even to just make them a plate. Instead he let his eyes flash gold as he whispered the spells Merlin had taught him and he watched as a plate made its way over to him filled with the finger sandwiches and pastries Draco had chosen for the night. 

“Your eyes-“ 

Harry looked down to see Draco watching him closely, his eyes locked on his own in wonder. 

“Do you like them?” Harry asked cheekily, knowing that wasn’t what Draco was talking about. 

“Do it again.” The blonde huffed.

Harry smiled as he let his eyes glow gold this time letting their candles go out before making them burn to life once again. 

“Beautiful” Draco whispered before kissing Harry once again.

Kissing Draco felt indescribable. When he was a younger man he’d dated a fair amount but no matter the partner, or how beautiful they were or how much he liked them, he always felt uncomfortable. 

Like something was just not quite right. 

With Draco, kissing him felt like diving head first into the ocean. His every thought was focused on Draco and Draco alone. The touch of his plush lips, the slide of his tongue, the taste of him. Every sound that he made was music to his ears and Harry was a man dying of thirst. 

Even as Draco pulled away Harry couldn’t help but chase his lips, unwilling to let him go once he was within arms reach. 

“Our picnics waiting for us Potter or have you forgotten.” Draco teased. He was still panting from the kiss his skin flushed red. 

Harry smiled and pulled him in for another kiss, the picnic could wait until he’d had his fill of Draco first. 

—-

Harry sighed as he walked into his front door, completely unbothered with his head in the clouds. 

Merlin watched curiously from his nest on the couch as he placed his bookmark in his book. 

Harry practically floated into the living room before collapsing on the couch next to Merlin. 

“Had a good night then?” Merlin asked as he tried to keep the grin off his face. 

Harry sighed dreamily as he nodded. It was well past midnight by the time he finally got back. “Draco took me for a moonlit picnic.” 

“Ahh is that so? Remind me to send him a fruits basket for keeping you out of my hair.” Merlin joked as Harry rolled his eyes. 

“Em he’s beautiful, I mean the moonlight, the rose garden, the candles. It was just so romantic. And I swear every time he laughed it was like there wasn’t enough air in my lungs.” 

Merlin hid his grin behind his book, he couldn’t help it Harry was so love sick it was downright adorable. 

“I’m glad, honestly Harry I think this is the happiest I’ve ever seen you.” Merlin noted with a shit eating grin. “Who knows maybe we will be hearing wedding bells before long.” 

Harry smacked him with a throw pillow for the joke before pulling it close to his chest. 

“It’s too early for that… but god I hope so.” He admitted. 

Merlin couldn’t help but to grin. He hoped so too. 

Chapter Text

Over the centuries Merlin had become well acquainted with all the ways people dealt with stress. 

It was a fundamental building block of the human condition and yet everyone’s approach was unique. 

Some people try to manufacture control while others used drugs and alcohol to lose control. 

Harry for some strange reason seemed to clean. 

Merlin didn’t realize that it was a stress response at first, after all Harry had always been a clean person. He was always in the kitchen cooking and then cleaning, he tidied up the house regularly enough and so did Merlin. Nothing out of the norm and if he was more meticulous when he was stressed it was never all that noticeable. 

That is until now.

They were three weeks into the month of October and by all accounts everything was going relatively well. There were no disasters, no big arguments, no injuries or illnesses. 

And yet Merlin was woken at 3:00am on a random Tuesday to a soft and sporadic knocking coming from the hallway. At first he’d been sure it was Kreacher, the poor elf couldn’t seem to break his conditioning and was always cleaning, no matter the time of day. 

When the sound didn’t stop after a few minutes he finally called Kreacher and asked him to stop making the infernal noise. 

“It is Potter, I tell him the floor is clean but he  never listen to Kreacher.” The elf complained causing Merlin to jump up from his bed. 

He quickly wore his robe and walked out into the hallway and sure enough there was Harry, on his hands and knees cleaning the hallway floor with a hand brush. The brush kept hitting the walls every few seconds  when Harry would try to clean every millimeter of the floor. 

He waited for a moment, his brain going a mile a minute as he tried to shake sleep from his mind but it seemed Harry hadn’t even noticed that he was there. 

“Harry?” He called but the boy didn’t turn around, he just kept scrubbing, this time even harder than before. 

“Harry it’s the middle of the bloody night why the hell are you scrubbing the hallway floors?” He finally demanded, the exhaustion finally winning out over his curiosity. 

Harry looked up at him suddenly, his eyes wide as his gaze landed on the sorcerer. 

“Em- hi, sorry I’ll be quieter.” He mumbled before turning back to the floor and scrubbing intensely. 

Merlin shook himself from the shock before quickly making his way to Harry. He knelt down next the him and stopped his hands. He hadn’t realized it in the dark light of the hall but his eyes the were shining with unshed tears. 

“Did- did you have another bad dream?” He asked cautiously. He’d learned over the past months that Harry’s nightmares were some of the most intrusive he’d seen. The poor boy was always so shaken by them but never like this. 

Harry nodded, his head falling on Merlin’s shoulder as the sorcerer pulled him in. He held Harry for a moment, allowing the boy to get his bearings. He could feel Harry’s erratic heartbeat finally start to calm as he’s breathing slowed. 

“That’s it one breath at a time.” Merlin whispered. 

After a few moments Merlin pulled back to look at Harry but the poor boy was avoiding meeting his eyes. The sorcerer sighed and helped the boy up as he asked Kreacher to put away the supplies he’d been using. 

He gently walked Harry down the stairs and into the living room to sit him down on the couch. His eyes lighting up as he spelled the tea to brew itself. 

Harry sat down and Merlin didn’t hesitate to wrap him in a blanket and grab another to throw on top of him. The wizard was so out of it he didn’t even protest. 

Merlin settled next to him as he crawled under the blanket and placed a pillow on his lap. Harry lay down without him having to ask, letting Merlin gently comb through his hair as he got his bearings. 

Merlin levitated the remote to himself and turned on the tv, letting the old black and white tv shows cut through the silence of the night. 

It was an hour before Harry spoke again. An hour where he just stared into the void unable to comprehend what was going on in his mind. The only thing that grounded him was the sound of Merlin’s breathing and his hands playing with his hair. 

“I’m sorry.” He whispered as Merlin’s hand froze momentarily before going back to petting him. 

“Nothing to apologize for. It’s okay.” He assured him but he could see the frustration in Harry’s eyes. No matter how often this happen or how many times Merlin assured him it was okay Harry always hated that he had no control over this. Over himself. 

Merlin sighed as he noticed the tension the boy held in his body. “Do you think you can stomach some tea?” 

Harry nodded but didn’t make an effort to move until the tray of tea and cookies levitated before him. 

Merlin handed Harry a cup of the mint tea he had personally created for nights like this. The ingredients all meant to sooth and relax. 

Harry took a small sip and then another. He looked less out of it than he had earlier and Merlin counted that as a win. 

He reached over to rest his hand on the boys head and finally green eyes met his. In the early morning light Harry looked so much younger than he seemed in the light of day. The truth was that he was young, too young to have faced the horrors that he had. Too young to have the weight of the world on his shoulders, far too young to hold the weight of his past alone. 

His hand slid to Harry cheek as the wizard leaned into the comforting touch. “Do you want to talk about it?” He offered gently. 

Harry sighed, he knew he should, that it would make him feel better but he hadn’t a clue where to even begin. 

“I dreamt about mum an dad.”

Merlin’s heart broke for him all over again, the strain in his voice, the way he trembled as he spoke was just torture for the sorcerer. 

“What happen?” He prompted unsure of what else he could do. 

Harry shook his head and Merlin let his hand fall as Harry drank from his cup trying against all hope to calm himself. 

Finally after a moment he pushed forward once more. “I…we were all together. They were alive, we were together and we were laughing and happy... You were there and so were Ron and Hermione, even Draco was there, we were all together. Then it was night time and I was in the house again. The one in Godrics Hollow and I heard their screams. I heard mom screaming but I couldn’t open the door I just couldn’t open the door I kept hitting it and pushing against it but I couldn’t stop the screams-“

Merlin pulled the boy into his arms, unable to hear another word. He couldn’t take it, seeing him in pain, seeing him suffer while knowing that the dreams were his memories was too much. The idea that he’d witnessed their deaths and then witnessed all the darkness that followed their murder was just horrific. 

He didn’t even know what he was saying, he was just trying to soothe him, tell him that he was safe and that he was okay. All he could do was keep rubbing the wizards back as he let him cry against his shoulder. 

He didn’t know how long he sat there holding Harry, the time didn’t really matter. All that mattered was that Harry wasn’t okay and he just didn’t know what else to do. All the other times Harry had nightmares they were never this bad. They didn’t cling to him the way this one seemed to and so Merlin was once again out of his depth and unable to do a damn thing about it. 

And worst of all there was no monsters he could rip to pieces just to make Harry feel safe this time. He felt entirely helpless. Was there truly nothing he could do to help the poor boy he’d come to care so dearly for? 

Eventually Harry lifted his head from his shoulder to vigorously wipe away his tears. Merlin stopped him before handing the boy a tissue. 

“This shouldn’t be bothering me, I mean-“ Harry began to say, the frustration in his mind spilling over as he said what he felt aloud. 

“Hey now that’s not fair. You’re allowed to be sad Harry-“ Merlin began. 

“It’s the stupid gala that’s the problem! I mean I get that it’s Halloween but I don’t understand why I have to attend. But it’s one bloody day of the year and I can’t even have it to myself?” He demanded much to Merlin’s confusion. 

“Halloween? Gala? Harry you’re not making sense what’s that got to do with it?” 

Harry froze suddenly as the realization dawning on him that Merlin didn’t know. He never told him. “It’s the anniversary… the day they were murdered.”

Merlin’s eyes widened, the shock obvious as it all clicked. “But- I mean they have to understand? They must know?” 

Harry just shook his head. “To them it’s the day they won the first war…Halloween’s already a huge deal and then that-“

“For them yeah but for you? I mean if there’s ever an event to skip isn’t this it?!” Merlin was so frustrated all of a sudden that he had half a mind do go talk to the minister of magic himself. 

Harry smiled softly at Merlin’s rage. It was sweet how he worried for him. 

“Tried. Can’t. We’re using the event to raise money for an orphanage that I helped open, I’m the big draw for a lot of those rich twats and I have to attend… it’s for the kids.” 

Merlin wanted to shake the boy out of his own stupidity. Time and time again it was clear that Harry would sacrifice the very clothes off his back for others but what about himself? How much could he possibly sacrifice when he was falling apart at the seams?

“Harry there must be something we can do? I mean can’t someone else attend or-“ Merlin  begged but Harry just shook his head. 

“Em they need the funding… I mean there’s so many more kids then we even expected and they need clothes and books and food. We fundraise constantly but Halloween is our biggest event. I’m the face of the charity I can’t just-“ He couldn’t let those kids down. He wouldn’t when he knew that he was the one responsible for looking out for them. He had to do this because if he didn’t no one would. 

“But that doesn’t mean you should have to sacrifice- okay what about this, why don’t we go visit their graves? Before the gala?” Merlin interjected. He knew better than to argue. Truth be told he couldn’t stomach the idea of the kids losing even a galleon of funding either so he couldn’t blame Harry for his frustration. 

Harry shook his head. “If I do that I’ll be in no condition to go to the event at all.” He knew he’d be a mess. He always was after he visited their grave. 

“Okay how about after? I mean okay you have to show your face but maybe you can leave early?” Merlin offered. 

“How? I mean everyone will be on me the second I do and I’m a shit liar. I can’t exactly fake sick-“

“I can! Take me? I mean if anyone can get you out of there on the drop of a hat it’s me!?” Merlin offered so adamantly that Harry was more than a little concerned. 

“Mate you’ve got a full blown case of crazy eyes going-“Harry advised. 

“Oh nonsense, come on this’ll be perfect!! We’ll go, you’ll show your face, I’ll cause a distraction and bam! We’re out of there before you even know it! Pleaseeeee?” The sorcerer begged. 

Harry sighed, he wanted to reject the offer, he really did, but the idea of having Merlin there at the gala with him made the whole thing seem a lot more bearable all of a sudden. 

“You promise you’ll stick with me at the event?” He asked sceptically. 

Merlin’s grin could have lit up the room. “So close that you’ll be sick of me.” Merlin promised. 

Harry smiled softly before putting down his cup of tea and laying his head back on the pillow so Merlin could play with his hair again. “I’ll hold you to it.” 

Merlin smiled as he lay his hand gently on his head, happy that there was finally something he could do to help. 

“So what’s with the whole cleaning thing?” Merlin hazarded to ask after a moment. 

Harry just shrugged, his eyes still focused on the tv. “I needed something to do with my hands. Couldn’t sit still after the dream and I couldn’t sleep so… cleaning it is.” 

The statement seemed to hang there, suspended between them. Merlin knew there was more to it, Harry had mentioned it in the past, the fact that his uncle and aunt had treated him like a slave his entire life. He didn’t need a further explanation, he couldn’t stomach it and it took everything in his body not to hunt the muggles down that very moment. 

Harry made himself more comfortable, the tension finally leaving his body as he let himself relax in Merlin’s company. Merlin smiled before reaching for a blanket and pulling it up to Harry’s shoulders to tuck him in. 

What Harry needed right now wasn’t revenge. It was this. 

A home, a friend, a family. 

Merlin could do that. For Harry he could do just about anything. 

—————

Harry groaned as he ran a brush through his hair for the millionth time, the vigorous routine of brushing and gelling down his flyaways doing nothing to tame the beast. 

He had dawned another impeccable three piece suit for the event, the suit was a dark shade of navy that matched the velvet of his robes. He had to admit that he looked quite good if it wasn’t for the nest attached to his head. 

Merlin snickered behind him as he watched the wizard struggle. “Harry you look fine, I don’t think there’s anything more you can do.” 

The sorcerer had chosen to wear a classic black suit with a dark purple robe with finally laid golden embroidery along its edges. The suit was newly made and tailored to his figure so that he looked nothing short of perfection. Or atleast that’s what Andromeda had said to him when she’d helped him pick it out. 

The green eyed boy was entirely unconvinced as he glared back at his reflection. “I look like I’ve just rolled out of bed!” He complained. 

“Mate I don’t think there’s a damn thing you can do to change that. I mean that mops got a mind of its own so maybe it’s time to give up? We were supposed to be at Hogwarts like 30 minutes ago.” Merlin teased. 

Harry swore as he checked his watch, the sorcerer was right they had to go. 

Quickly both men made it to the floo, the channel to the school was open for those attending the function so atleast they could get there quickly. 

Harry silently thanked the heavens for the ministry’s decision to hold the gala at the school. Every other years the function was held in different locations and some were far more accessible than others. This year the headmistress had agreed to lend the great hall to the ministry in an effort to try and incentivize as many donors to attend as possible. 

After all there wasn’t a more beautiful venue for the rich to rub shoulders then the newly repaired Hogwarts. Especially considering that it was this gala that helped fund said repairs over the last 9 years. 

Harry could already imagine how many witches and wizards would spend the night gloating about the size of their donations to the school. All their comments just obvious attempts to flaunt their wealth and power. 

Despite it all as Harry walked through the floo to arrive just outside the great hall he couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief fall over him. 

Being back at Hogwarts still felt like coming home even after all of these years. 

Merlin’s hand fell on his shoulder and pulled him out of his reverie. He smiled back at the sorcerer as he readjusted his suit and robes.    The sorcerer grinned as he gave him two thumbs up to which Harry rolled his eyes before chuckling. 

“Mr. Potter it’s about time you arrived! Honestly you’re as bad at managing your time as ever I see.” Professor Mcgonagall chastised the moment she laid her eyes on the young man. 

Harry grinned as he greeted her happily. “Professor you remember my roommate Martin.” He introduced as Merlin happily shook her hand. 

“It’s wonderful to see you again ma’am.” Merlin agreed as the headmistress eyed the boys sceptically. 

“I expect that you’ll both behave yourselves while you’re at this event?” 

Harry chuckled. “I always behave myself professor.” 

Minerva’s glare was piercing. “We both know that’s not true. I expect you to mind yourself Harry we’re here for a good cause.” She reminded, her gaze as stern as always. 

“Yes ma’am.” Harry agreed almost instinctively as Merlin tried not to laugh.  Harry didn’t hesitate to grab Merlin by the arm and drag him into the hall before he could find a way to tease him in front of the professor. 

In true Hogwarts fashion the hall was downright stunning. The enchanted ceilings showed the cloudy moonlit night while the hall was dressed in candelabras and cornucopias. The theme of the ball was dark elegance, there were black candles enchanted to float in the air, velvet curtains were draped elegantly along the walls and the walls themselves were enchanted with vines where leaves of different colours dressed the bricks. The floor was cleared for mingling and for dancing later in the night and the entire hall was full of the who’s who of wizarding society all dressed to the nines.  

Merlin could feel the magic of the school whisper against his skin, in a place steeped with so much magic it was to be expected and Merlin couldn’t help but enjoy it. 

Harry led Merlin into the crowd and quickly pulled a drink out of the levitating trays circling the party. He handed a glass to Merlin before taking a sip, hoping it would calm his nerves. He truly detested events like this. 

Unfortunately, he didn’t get to enjoy even a second of solitude as wizard after wizard and witch after witch approached him to say hello. 

He was sure he’d introduced Merlin to half of wizarding Britain before he even got the chance to finish his drink. 

Harry tried his best to smile and engage with the elderly witch who had decided to take it upon herself to flirt shamelessly with him as her husband rubbed shoulders with the minister. 

Thankfully, Merlin decided to intervene and steal the woman’s attention much to Harry’s relief. 

Harry watched on as Merlin went out of his way to be polite and talked the woman into joking around with him. He had her giggling like a schoolgirl in seconds and the green eyed wizard wasn’t sure if he should be impressed or disturbed. 

For all his complaining about socializing Merlin was brilliant when it came to buttering up the rich and famous. His natural charisma and old world charm did wonders on the socialites and much to Harry’s relief they were well on their way to meeting their fundraising targets. 

A shock of blond hair caught Harry’s eye and pulled his attention almost immediately.  Half way across the room he saw the Malfoy’s make a grand entrance. Harry’s eyes zeroed in on Draco almost immediately. 

He couldn’t say he was surprised, the Malfoy seniors had taken to attending every social event possible these past few years in a desperate attempt to regain their footing in society. No, what was surprising was that Draco had actually come with them. 

And if the scowl on his face was any indication he was less than pleased about the arrangement. 

“Harry, Ms. Griffith was just telling me that the pumpkin pastries are to die for. Should we go get some?” Merlin offered, his face lit up with a grin as his eyes followed Harry’s line of sight straight to Draco. 

Harry smiled back at him like he’d hung the moon as the men made a quick getaway before anyone could catch them. 

From the corner of his eye he could see Shacklebolt eying him but when had Harry ever let someone’s disapproval stop him from doing what he wanted. 

The second they got away he made a bee line towards that blonde head of hair. 

“Em you’re the best I swear! I’m never going to one of these bloody events without you again!” Harry grinned. 

Merlin laughed, if there’s one thing he learned after all his years it was how to make a quick getaway. “You just say the word and I’ll have us out of here so fast they’ll think we were just an apparition.” 

Harry was so busy grinning back at him that he didn’t notice the wizard that had come to a stop right in front of him. 

The force of the impact pushed him back as he looked to see a disgruntled Lucius Malfoy glaring back at him. Evidently he had followed the wrong head of blonde hair. 

Fuck. 

By the look on Merlin’s face you could tell he was just as surprised as Harry. 

“Mister Potter, still running into trouble every chance you get I see?” Lucius sneered, his voice low so the other party goers couldn’t hear them. Harry glared but forced himself to smile back at the man. 

“Lucius, it’s been a while. And to answer your question, yes. Yes, I do. Every single chance I get.” His smile was as charming as it could get and the distaste on Lucius’ face was worth every second. 

“Potter what the hell are you doing?” 

Harry smiled at Lucius like some sort of demonic beast, his grin sharp as a tiger before he turned to see Draco’s expectant glare looking back at him while Narcissia stood amused by his side. 

“Hey there trouble, I was just looking for you.” Harry happily advised much to Draco’s confusion and his fathers horror. 

Merlin had to cover him mouth in fear that his jaw might actually hit the floor. Harry was practically feral in the way he grinned at Draco, his eyes shamelessly devouring the boys figure. 

Lucius was momentarily frozen in shock, the disgust obvious on his face until rage took over his features. 

“What the hell did you mean by that-“ Harry raised a hand to stop the man before he could truly begin. 

“I wasn’t speaking to you Lucius, now if you’ll excuse me I have something important to do. Can I have a moment Draco?” Harry asked as he turned back to the blonde.

Draco sighed, exasperated by both the men acting like idiots. It was the gentle sound of his mother’s laughter that stole his attention. 

“Mister Potter you’ll never stop marching to the beat of your own drum will you?” She asked as she walked over to the boy. Harry smiled and reached down to kiss her cheek. 

“Not anytime soon Mrs. Malfoy.” 

She smiled brightly back at him before pinning her husband with her glare, practically begging him to try and say a word and see what would happen. 
 

Lucius glanced between all of them, unable to comprehend what was happening.  “Draco you will not go with him!” He seethed. 

Draco glared at his father with a viciousness that was entirely unexpected for Harry. His eyes barely containing his rage. “I am not a child father, I do not need you to tell me what I can and cannot do.” He seethed, not hesitating to go toe to toe against his father. “Let’s go Potter.” He demanded as he spun on his heel and marched out of the hall with Harry following like a wayward puppy behind him. 

Merlin stood still as he watched the departure unsure of what to do with himself but tried his best not to laugh at the elder Malfoy who’s face was now turning a lovely purple. 

“You must be Martin, my sister’s talked a lot about you these past few months.” Merlin turned to Narcissia and smiled back at her with all the charm he could muster. 

“And you must be the lovely sister she speaks so often about. Can I offer to get you a drink Mrs. Malfoy?” 

Before Lucius could get over his shock Narcissia took Merlin’s arm and began to walk towards the bar. “I’d love too. It’ll give my dear husband a chance to cool off.” She noted pointedly as she met Lucius’ eye. 

Merlin wasn’t quite sure what was happening but he couldn’t help but shake the feeling that there was some type of unsaid war waging amongst the Malfoy’s. 

—-

Draco was fuming as he made a warpath through the gala and marched towards the exit. He didn’t care who crossed his path or what they said but his glare managed to ward off anyone who so much a considered coming to speak with him. 

He didn’t have to stop or look to know that Harry was following on his heels. Instead he walked straight out the door and made a beeline for an abandoned classroom he knew was nearby. 

He waltzed straight into the classroom and waited till he heard the sound of the door slamming shut behind Harry. 

“I know I shouldn’t have done that- I promise I wasn’t trying to make you angry-“ Harry began instantly, hoping that the boy would relent from his anger once he explained himself. 

What he didn’t expect was for Draco to walk up to him like a man possessed, grab him by the lapels of his robes and pull him into a kiss. 

It took a moment for Harry’s brain to catch up with him but once he felt Draco’s tongue against him it was like the flood gates had been opened. He didn’t even know when they had started moving but he stoped once he’d walked Draco back to the teachers desk. 

He lifted the boy onto the table without breaking the kiss for a second but finally the need for air won over his need for Draco. 

He let his head fall into the crook of Draco’s neck and he pulled the boy into his chest and gave himself the chance to just breath him in. 
 

Here in this abandoned classroom, surrounded by Draco, the scent of his soap, the gentle cadence of his breathing, his arms wrapped around him holding him close, he felt a semblance of peace. 

Draco ran a hand through his hair and down his neck until it came to a stop at Harry’s heart. He pushed back gently hoping Harry would meet his eye but when he tightened his hold on Draco the blonde simply gave up. 

He smiled gently to himself as he nuzzled against the top of Harry’s head, his anger finally subsiding. 

“I still don’t understand why you even came to this thing Potter.” He noted, his tone lacking its normal sharpness. 

“It’s for the children-“ he mumbled against his neck, he didn’t have to look to know that Draco was rolling his eyes. 

“Honestly, theres never a day of rest when your Saint Potter. Merlin’s beard Potter, you could just try saying no for once.” His tone was downright scathing in a way that made Harry smile. 

“Yeah well what’s your excuse?” He asked as he began to trail his lips against Draco’s neck. The blonde shivered before pulling back to glare at the boy who lived. 

Grey eyes finally met green and Draco sighed, his fiery resolve melting under Harry’s gaze. 

Draco looked off to the side, unable to look at Harry as he spoke. “Father demanded that I attend despite my obvious distaste for functions of this nature.” 

Harry’s eyes narrowed, the Slytherin always had a way of saying as little as possible and he got the distinct feeling that there was a lot more to be said. 

“Afraid you’ll get hexed or something?” He joked. Draco turned back to glare at him and Harry couldn’t help but feel pleased. It didn’t matter what it took as long as Draco’s attention was on him, he was happy. 

“Obviously not. He’s told my mother in no uncertain terms that he plans to use my marriage to claw his way back into the good graces of society. Apparently this was the perfect opportunity to show me off to potential suitors.” 

Harry saw red in that exact moment but rather than the rage that usually rampaged through him when angry a startling calm overtook him. “I’ll kill anyone who tries to take you from me.” 

Draco froze. His eyes locked onto the smouldering green of the precious saviour of the wizarding world who looked less like a hero and more like a terrifying villain at that exact moment. If there was one thing Draco knew about Harry James Potter it was that when he said something he meant every word of it. 

Harry moved closer then he already was, the hand that was previously stationary on his waist glided against his body and up his chest to wrap around his neck. Draco couldn’t help but to sigh as he leaned into Harry’s touch. His fingers flexing and tightening against him. Draco hadn’t even realized he had closed his eyes but when he opened them again he felt dazed. 

Harry’s eyes bore into his and Draco whimpered, unable to help himself. 

“Who do you belong to Draco?” Harry’s voice had dropped to a low timber that made Draco felt like his legs were no longer strong enough to hold himself up. He thanked his lucky stars for the desk underneath him or he would have surly ended up falling to his knees. 

“You.” Draco whispered. He felt Harry’s fingers tighten around his neck and he suddenly wished he could simply fall to his knees and leave himself in Harry’s capable hands but the gentle sound of music from the gala reminded him this was neither the time nor place. 

“If anyone so much as touches you do you know what I’d do?” Harry asked almost gently, reverently. Draco was practically shaking, his mind cloudy. Harry’s other hand reached up to entangle in his hair, the gentle tug pulling him back suddenly. “Answer me pet, what would I do if I found out anyone has touched you?”

“Hurt them?” Draco offered half heartedly, but Harry’s grin was practically feral as he should his head. 

“Oh no baby…” He whispered, his fingers flexing gently against his neck. “That’s not enough. You’re mine after all … and no one touches what belongs to me.” 

Draco whimpered, he leaned up to kiss Harry but was unable to move. Harry smiled softly back at him, clearly amused that Draco would even try when Harry had no intention of letting him go. 

“No baby if anyone touches you-“ Harry began, waiting till Draco focused enough to meet his gaze. “I’ll bathe you in their blood.”

Draco nodded, his eyes watering in frustration as he leaned up to kiss Harry again. This time the gryffindor finally relented and pulled Draco in for a kiss. He didn’t hesitate to devour Draco and the poor blonde could barely keep up.

Harry was like a locomotive and all Draco could do was hold on for the ride. It was overwhelming in the best ways, the feel of Harry’s body against him, his hands wandering over his body, pulling him in, holding him tight, sliding his hands underneath his ass so he could grope him as he pushed Draco further up on the desk. 

Draco could feel saliva dripping down his chin but it didn’t matter. He couldn’t care less about the state of his clothing or the mess Harry was making of his hair as he pulled and tugged on the locks. His entire world narrowed to the feeling of Harry’s fingers tightened around his neck and all Draco could do was moan, his grasp of himself falling by the wayside second by second. 

Finally Harry pulled himself away from the blonde, the sounds outside the classroom forcing him to remember exactly where they were. 

He pulled the blond into his chest, letting him slowly get his bearings back as Harry hugged him tight and whispered sweet nothings into his ear. 

“That’s it baby, I’ve got you. You’re mine and I won’t let anyone else have you. I’ll take care of you. I will protect you.” He whispered like a prayer as he saw Draco finally regain some comprehension and nod. 

“Yours.” Draco agreed. “Always yours.” 

Harry smiled brightly back at him, he crouched down, his hand still heavy against the back of Draco’s neck as he met those grey eyes once again. “Come back to me love.” 

Draco breathed deeply as he nodded, he hadn’t even realized he was shaking but Harry kept rubbing his arm. His touch the exact comfort Draco needed. 

Finally Draco met his gaze, his mind finally back in the front seat and Harry smiled brightly back at him before kissing him gently on the forehead. “That’s my Draco, feeling alright?” 

Draco nodded, but when he felt Harry’s hand move from his neck he moved quickly to stop it, holding it in place against his neck. 

“Sorry I just-“ Draco began. 

“Hey it’s okay… I’m all yours, if you don’t want me to move I won’t. Not even an inch.” Harry assured and Draco couldn’t help but to smile softly back at him. 

It took Draco a moment to collect himself before he could finally admit what was on his mind. 

“It spooked me. The fight with my father I… You’re the brave one not me.” Draco finally admitted, his gaze falling to his lap, unable to meet Harry’s out of shame. How could he not feel ashamed, here was Harry who would take on the world in an instance and he’d been practically beside himself just having to stand up to his own father. He felt like a pathetic coward. 

Harry sighed, his hand tilting Draco’s chin up until he met his eyes once again. “You fought him about it didn’t you?” He didn’t have to ask, he knew his answer right from the very beginning. 

Draco nodded, his eyes falling to the floor once again. He’d hated it, hated the confrontation, the things his father said, the threats he made, the manipulation tactics he’d used, the insults he’d hurled. Every single part of it was horrible but what other choice did he have? If he couldn’t fight for himself then could he even think himself worthy of Harry’s affections? 

He already thought himself a pathetic coward and he couldn’t even begin to imagine why the hell Harry even wanted him. But when his father had demanded that he marry some prissy witch his father deemed suitable, it was like he was consumed by a rage he’d never experienced before. He’d sacrificed enough for his father already he wouldn’t sacrifice Harry too.  

“My brave Draco” Harry whispered much to Draco’s surprise. His wide eyes looked back at Harry so suddenly and what he saw took his damn breath away. 

Harry was smiling back at him so brightly it made tears prickle against the corners of his eyes. Harry’s hand cupped his cheek as he made sure the blondes complete attention was on him and him alone. 

“You were so brave for me pet and I’m so so proud of you.” Harry added and the dazzling smile Draco graced him with was well worth coming to this stupid event. 

“I’d do anything for you Harry.” Draco admitted and the grin Harry gave him was breathtaking. 

Harry reached down to kiss him again and Draco all but wrapped around him. His fingers were entangled in his dark hair and his legs wrapped around his waist as he pulled him in close with every intention of getting Harry to fuck him stupid against the sturdy desk. 

Unfortunately a sudden knocking caused them to freeze in their tracks. They turned to see an annoyed professor Mcgonagall standing at the door. The boys sprang apart so fast it would have made heads spin. 

“Professor! I can explain-“ Harry’s began as Draco jumped off the desk and tried to make himself look somewhat presentable. 

“Save it Mister Potter. To think that I’d have to tell you about school policies against improper behaviour at this age is nothing short of ridiculous. Get yourselves in order and do try to stay out of the abandoned classrooms?” She lectured. Harry blushed something fierce and cringed as though he’d been hexed. 

“They’re off limits I’m guessing?” He offered to lighten the mood much to Minerva’s annoyance. 

“Not that that’s ever stopped you but yes. Honestly boys.” She shook her head as she gave them both a stern glare before walking out of the room. “I expect to see you inside the Gala shortly.” 

“Yes Ma’am” “Yes Ma’am” the boys both chorused now that they’d been properly chastised as she swept out of the room. 

They waited a split second before Harry burst out laughing. 

“Harry this is not funny!” Draco chastised but even he was struggling to keep the smile off his face. 

“Oh come on first at the Burrow and now this? I mean I have always imagined snogging you in an abandoned classroom-“ Harry joked as he tried against all hope to get his robes back in order. 

“Always huh?” Draco teased as he pulled out his wand and spelled the gryffindors robes back into place before doing the same with his own. 

“You’ll have to teach me that one. And are you really going to tell me you haven’t thought about it before?” He teased as Draco rolled his eyes and led the way out of the room. 

“Maybe on occasion.” He mumbled, his blush giving him away as Harry grinned. 

Before Draco could open the door and walk out into the hall Harry stopped him. He gently kissed Draco one more time. “Listen I’m going to head out soon but you’re more than welcome to come with me. Or if you need me to I can stay-” 

Draco couldn’t help but to smile as he shook his head. Only this goofball would put him first over even himself. 

“I’ll be just fine, after all mother is on my side and for what it’s worth … you’re mine too and I’m not giving you up either.” Draco admitted honestly. The smile Harry graced him with was well worth going to war with his father. “Go, I’ll be fine I promise. I’d come with you if it wasn’t for mum-” 

“It’s okay I’ve got Em with me so I won’t be alone.” Harry admitted.

“Good. Him I trust, you not so much.” Draco teased as he planted another gentle kiss on Harry’s lips before marching out the door. It took Harry a second to process the jab before he quickly ran after him. 

—- 

Merlin wasn’t entirely sure how he’d managed to get himself into his current predicament but he couldn’t help but feel it wasn’t entirely his own fault. 

No no it couldn’t be, not when Harry had been the one to make the mistake of leaving him alone to his own devises. 

Though he supposed he couldn’t entirely blame Harry for the fact that he had Blaise Zabini’s tongue in his mouth. 

The owner of said tongue was doing a pretty brilliant job of pushing that thought out of his mind as his hands roamed Merlin’s figure unapologetically. 

Earlier in the evening he hadn’t paid much attention to who was in attendance at the event. He didn’t think that he really needed to, Harry had warned him that their friends wouldn’t be there after all so who exactly would he have thought to keep an eye out for?

That was until Mrs. Malfoy introduced him to Mrs. Zabini, a beautiful woman who was attending the event with her son. 

Her son who had looked at Merlin like his next meal from the moment his eyes fell on him. 

Next thing he knew they were in a bloody alcove pawing at each other like a couple of horny teenagers. 

“Fuck you’re addictive.” Blaise groaned as he pushed Merlin up against the wall and trailed kisses down his overly sensitive neck. 

Merlin moaned before clasping his hand over his mouth only for Blaise to pull his hand away. 

“I want to hear you lose control precious.” The low timber of his voice was downright sinful and Merlin tried not to cry out as he felt Blaise pull away. 

He hadn’t even realized he closed his eyes but when he opened them Blaise was watching him so closely it made him blush. 

“You’re so beautiful I want to take you apart piece by piece and devour you.” He practically growled and Merlin nearly let him. 

That is until the heard the sound of approaching footsteps and froze. Blaise smirked at him and allowed his hand to reach for Merlin’s waist, pulling him close before slowly reaching around to still against his ass. 

Merlin’s eyes widened but he bit his lip in an effort to remain silent while Blaise groped him. Merlin couldn’t help but to whimper as he felt Blaise grind against him. 

The whisper of voices reached them as the footsteps passed their alcove, the words carrying past them as they went. 

“I just have to find Em’ first-” 

Merlin let his head fall against the wall, he had to get ahold of himself for goodness sake. 

“Let me take you home? I promise I’ll make it well worth missing the gala.” Blaise suggested, as he watched the frustration colour Merlin’s face. 

Merlin took a deep breath, willing himself to regain control before finally smiling back at Blaise. 

“Sorry, I can’t. At least not tonight?” Merlin offered, his silly little grin both disarming and adorable. 

Blaise sighed, the devilish smirk still plastered on his face as he looked Merlin up and down like he was the most scrumptious of deserts. “Alright but be warned-“ his eyes smouldered as he pinned Merlin in place. The sorcerer swallowed, his body holding onto the suspense as Blaise leaned down to whisper in his ear. “When I do get my hands on you next there will be no stopping me.” 

Merlin groaned his head falling back against the wall once more. He nodded as Blaise smirked before kissing him one last time. 

Blaise smirked as his eyes roamed apologetically over Merlin. “Until next time Martin.” He said before walking back to the gala. 

Merlin groaned as he took a moment to compose himself before following after him. 

As he re-entered the gala he thanked his lucky stars that he spotted Harry right away, he was at the edge of the room speaking to Draco, Mrs. Malfoy, and Mrs. Zabini. Blaise was luckily missing from their company for which Merlin was eternally greatful. He genuinely feared that he’d burst into flames if that man looked at him again with that smirk of his. 

“Ah Martin, I was wondering where you ran off too. Did Blaise help you find the lavatory?” Mrs. Zabini asked as he approached and he tried to smile and nod but he could see the look Harry was giving him out of the corner of his eye. 

“Oh yeah he did, he’s such a gentleman really.” He added to which Mrs. Zabini and Mrs. Malfoy chuckled. Draco downright scoffed and he could see him and Harry sharing a look. 

“I’m glad I left you in such good company.” Harry teased, his eyes practically twinkling as he grinned back at Merlin. 

Merlin could feel himself blushing and all he wanted was to glare at the boy but all he could do was smile and laugh before finally pretending to check the time. “Blimey is that the time? Harry we should get going?” 

Harry smirked, he could see through Merlin in an instant but now wasn’t the time to call him on his obvious embarrassment. “Let’s go!” 

The boys cut through the gala and walked out the door as fast as physically possible. As they exited the event they could hear someone start to talk, it was the minister of magic making his key note speech. Harry gave Merlin a look of concern but Merlin paid it no mind as he grabbed Harry by the arm and pulled him out the front door of the castle rather than towards the floo. 

“We can’t apparate from Hogwarts ‘Em” Harry warned but Merlin just grinned back at him. 

“You mean you can’t.” Merlin said as they walked outdoors until they were alone. Merlin extended his arm and Harry took it and instantly the sorcerer transported them to Godrics Hollow. 

—- 

“How exactly were you able to do that?” Harry asked the second they appeared on the edge of Godrics Hollow. 

Merlin shrugged. “It’s wards that prevent apparation, I’ve been keyed into them since they were put into place.” 

Harry chuckled, he wasn’t surprised the sorcerer seemed to have a knack for finding a workaround for just about every problem. Not that Harry was complaining, lord knows the man had gotten him out of one hell of a jam tonight. 

Harry froze as he noticed the house from the corner of his eyes. It looked the same as it always did when he came to visit but for some reason, being there tonight of all nights sat heavy with him. 

A cold wind blew through the air and the trees seemed to shake under the force of the winds. It felt as though a storm was coming but he couldn’t be sure if that was his intuition or his mind taking the storm waging within him and projecting it onto his reality. 

Merlin’s hand falling on his shoulder pulled him from his thoughts. The sorcerer smiled softly back at him, coaxing him to not get lost within his own mind. He didn’t even have to say the words for Harry to know what he meant. 

Harry nodded as he took a shaky breath and made his way to the house so he could finally stand before it. The street looked so inconspicuous, in the distance he could see children running about, probably on their way to a costume party. He could see the other houses all lit up, likely filled to the brim with happy families. And in the midst of them all there stood the home that was once meant to be theirs. 

“I used to imagine what it might have been like. To live with them… to grow up and have a normal life here. Maybe I’d have learned to walk in this garden or made memories drawing with chalk on this sidewalk?” Harry explained, a smile on his face as him mind fabricated memories of what could have been. 

Merlin nodded, his arm reaching to wrap around Harry’s as his head fell to his shoulder. “It would have been a wonderful life. I’m sure of it.” 

Harry nodded, his other hand reaching up to wipe away the stray tear. “I’ve never had the heart to sell this place. I mean it’s sat here practically abandoned but every time I think about it... I just don’t have the heart to even go inside.” 

Merlin smiled gently back at him. “Yeah… I get that. Since my son died I haven’t had the heart to go back to my house either. Even after so long I … I still dread it.” 

Harry’s bright green eyes met his for a moment before he let his head fall gently against Merlin’s. “At least… at least we have each other. I might not have had the chance to call this place home but … I’m glad you feel like home to me Em’.” 

Merlin’s eyes welled with unshed tears. He nodded as he burrowed his face into Harry’s arm. “Thank you for giving me a home Harry. I don’t think I could ask for a better brother.” 

Harry chuckled softly in agreement. “You know I used to imagine what it’d be like?” 

“To have a brother? Me too, I used to ask my mum to go out and get me one. Couldn’t you imagine? In those days no less?” Merlin joked making Harry laugh again. 

“You’re poor mum she was probably beside her self just dealing with you. I used to imagine I had a long lost brother who’d show up one day to rescue me.” Harry said with a smirk that Merlin knew often brought trouble. 

“Am I everything you imagined?” Merlin asked sarcastically. 

“Nope not even close. I imagined him being cool and edgy not a giant dork.” Harry teased making Merlin laugh. 

“Well too bad, this dorky nerd is the best you’re going to get.” Merlin joked making them both laugh. 

Harry smiled at Merlin before looking back at the home. He smiled to himself and then at Merlin before leading them to the cemetery. 

It didn’t take them long to get there, he knew the way by heart now and as he finally stood before their grave he realized that for the first time, he didn’t feel lonely being there. 

“Mum, dad, I’d like you to meet my friend Merlin. He’s … he’s the best brother a guy could ask for and I … I know you’d have liked him.” Harry introduced his eyes watering as he turned to Merlin. 

Merlin’s watery eyes met his as he smiled before turning to the headstones. “Mr. and Mrs. Potter, it’s so nice to meet you. Truth be told I … I feel like I already do know you. I mean it’s impossible not to. I know I don’t have to say this but your son… you would have been so very proud of him.” His voice cracked as he spoke. He couldn’t help it, not when he could feel the haggard breathing coming from Harry as he tried to hold it together. 

He felt Harry tuck his head into him collar as the tears fell from his eyes and so Merlin pulled him in close. He raised his hand as he whispered a spell so that flowers bloomed at the foot of both headstones, a perfect arrangement of roses and lilly’s. 

Eventually Harry pulled back as he wiped away the tears before casting a disillusionment charm and taking a seat across from his parents gravestones.  

He patted the spot next to him and Merlin sat down with him. They both sat in silence, lost in their thoughts as the breeze continued to shake the leaves of the trees around them. 

“You know what I forgot?” Harry asked suddenly. Merlin looked back at him curiously but the wizard just smirked. “To swipe a bottle from the party on our way out.”

Merlin laughed before reaching into the inner pocket of his robe and pulling out a bottle of whiskey much to Harry’s absolute joy. “What exactly do you take me for? See I can be cool and edgy.”

“Okay you get points for that.” Harry laughed as he grabbed the bottle to open it. 

“Do you think they’d mind? I mean it feels a tad disrespectful.” Merlin noted, his eyes scanning the cemetery as though someone was going to reprimand them despite the magic he had cast. 

Harry shrugged. “Their best friend was Sirius Black, I recon they wouldn’t mind.” 

Merlin smiled as he watched Harry take a swing before handing him the bottle. 

“So what was the deal with you and Blaise?” He asked nonchalantly as though he hadn’t intended to make Merlin choke on his whisky. 

Merlin coughed and then glared as he watched Harry snicker. “In front of your parents?!” 

Harry laughed as he nodded. “I’m sure they don’t get any good gossip in the afterlife.” 

Merlin shook his head at the man before taking another swing and passing the bottle to Harry. 

“I blame you entirely for that you know-“ her complained as Harry laughed. 

“Me? How am I responsible I mean it’s not like I threw you at him? Mum dad do you see what I have to put up with?” Harry complained before he took another drink. 

“You left me alone in a huge gala all on my own I mean come on!” Merlin argued with his full chest as Harry continued to snicker. 

“Ah yes, how dare I leave you there. I mean anything could have happen, you could have been eaten by a giant or kidnapped by a troll. I mean it’s a wonder you’re even here to tell the tale.” Harry joked sarcastically as he watched Merlin take another drink. 

“You should thank your lucky stars! I’ll have you know that Zabini even tried to take me home.” 

Harry’s eyes widened as he grinned. “No fucking way! Did he really!? I mean wasn’t he accompanying his mother?” 

“Yeah well his company didn’t stop him from putting his tongue down my throat.” Merlin joked. 

“HA! I freaking knew it! I mean I knew you looked out of sorts!” Harry exclaimed like he’d just won the lottery. 

Merlin rolled his eyes and took another swing before handing the bottle back to Harry. 

“Please it’s not like I was the only one. Don’t think I didn’t notice the way Draco looked. I mean he was as red as a tomato when you got back.” Merlin teased right back. Harry couldn’t help but to grin at the memory. 

“Mum dad you’re going to love this! So I stuck it to Lucius Malfoy, snogged his son in an abandoned classroom and got caught by  Mcgonagall all within the hour.” He gloated as Merlin shook his head while he chuckled. 

“You’re a menace you know that? I mean I thought the man’s head was about to explode. You know he was turning purple when you left?” Merlin joked as he watched Harry take another swing. 

“Good, fuck him. He wants to marry off Draco for his own political aspirations. He’s lucky he’s not in Azkaban as it is, if he thinks I’m going to let that happen-“ Harry began to rant, his usual filters gone under the buzz of alcohol. 

“Yeah yeah I don’t think that was ever a doubt. I mean I think Draco’d probably claw his eyes out before you got a shot at him if that argument was anything to do by.” Merlin interjected as he recalled the way the Malfoy’s spoke to each other during the gala. 

“Yeah I honestly think he would.” Harry grinned, he couldn’t help it. He loved the fact that Draco would fight for him. The thought brought a warmth to his chest. 

Merlin smiled as he reached out to take the bottle and take a swing. He shivered as a particularly strong breeze passed them by but neither of them made an effort to move. 

Instead they spent the night smiling and laughing and filling in Harry’s parents about all the things that they had missed. 

Beyond the veil Lilly and James Potter couldn’t help but smile knowing their son was in good hands. 

Chapter Text

“Are you ready for your first day Mr. Emerson?” 

Merlin didn’t really know how to answer that question if he was honest with himself. 

It was mid way through November and just as Hermione had promised she had somehow managed to expedite his application and secure him a position at St. Mungo’s. How she had managed to do so this quickly was beyond him but as he looked back at the smiling face of Head Healer Fernsby and the damn near euphoric excitement radiating off Hermione he couldn’t do anything but smile and nod. 

“I can’t wait!” He exclaimed, his voice sounding a lot squeakier than it should. Lucky for him only Hermione seemed to pick up on this nervousness as he was taken on a tour of the facilities and introduced to more people than he’d probably met in the last three centuries combined. 

If Hermione was correct about one thing and one thing alone it was the fact that working at St. Mungo’s was like losing yourself in time. 

One second it was like he was walking through the front gates and the next thing he knew it was 3 in the afternoon and he was practically collapsing down onto a cafeteria chair. 

“You know I thought Granger was balmy getting you this job the way she did but I don’t think I could have cured that curse this quickly if you hadn’t been there.” Draco admitted as he placed two cups of tea on the table. 

Merlin grinned back at him, he knew high praise when he heard it and that coming from Draco was practically the gold standard.

“How did you know how to cure it? I mean I expect Hermione to pull random cures out of her ass but you too?” Healer Jacobs agreed as he pulled up a chair at the table. 

Draco looked the other man up and down like he was less then impressed by the other wizard and Merlin had to school his features so he didn’t snicker. Draco’s blatant dislike of almost every one was honestly a show in and of itself and Merlin thanked his lucky stars that the blonde considered him a friend. 

“He’s lucky I’ve seen something similar in the past. It’s a damn old curse that’s for sure.” Merlin offered without much detail. He could tell that Jacobs looked ready to ask more questions but thankfully Merlin was saved by the bell. 

Before long they were all on deck dealing with one patient after another. 

As Merlin treated his 12th patient for the day he realized that Hermione was probably right about him coming back to work. At St. Mungo’s, amongst the patients and the chaos of it all he felt like himself again. 

Now he just had to make sure that he never admitted that to the witch or else she’d never let him live it down. Though from the looks she’d been shooting him throughout the day it seemed she could already see right through him. 

——

“This is the 12th sacrifice we’ve found and we still don’t have a single bloody lead!?” Head Auror Robards seethed as he looked out over the bull pen where he had collected his entire brigade of Aurors to put the fear of god into them. 

Harry and Ron shared a look of frustration as they stood at the front of the group while the head auror ripped them a new one. 

They had spent months spending every waking moment obsessing about this case with no luck. No clues, no witnesses, not a shred of evidence that could shine further light on the conundrum that was this god forsaken case. 

“Potter run us through the evidence!” He shouted and without missing a beat Harry raised his wand and the board he and Ron were working on appeared before them. 

“These are the locations of each of the sacrifices, at every one the locations all of the evidence was destroyed by fiend fire. Based on magical reconstructions we know that each of the locations contained what we believe to be a summoning circle. Unfortunately due to the destruction we’re unable to identify the type of circle being used or clearly identify the identities of those who have been sacrificed.” Harry explained as Ron moved towards the front of the room to join him. 

“What we do know is that whoever is using this has to have had access to an ancient archive of dark magic. Summoning circles have been illegal for the last 500 years and the department of mysteries is instrumental in ensuring that any books or references to this type of magic are restricted.” Ron explained. 

“We believe that the perpetrators are likely linked to Antonin Dolohov and Walden Macnair who escaped from holding 2 years ago alongside a number of other death eaters. They were recently spotted in west London two days before the appearance of the fourth sacrificial site.” Harry continued. 

“The problem is that we have no idea where they could be hiding. Or what they’re planning.” Ron added. 

“We do believe that this has been a planned effort on their part. Everything from the location of the sites, the times of the sacrifices, to the destruction of the evidence leads us to believe that they’re taking measures to prevent us from stopping them.” Harry finished. 

“Do we know what they’re trying to summon?” Auror Jenkins asked as though it should be obvious and Harry couldn’t help but to glare. Ron quickly interjected before Harry could say a word. 

“No, we don’t. We’d need to see the summoning circle to be able to tell but the pieces we have found are too small and scattered to make a complete picture. Given the size of the circle and the number of them we’ve found so far whatever their summoning will be powerful. Our best bet is preventing them from finishing the summoning.” 

The entire group was now murmuring amongst themselves as fear swept through the room. 

“They can’t summon … you know who can they?” Auror Miller asked causing a hush to fall over the room. She was one of their youngest recruits and looked truly terrified at the prospect. 

“We’ve considered it but it’s unlikely.” Ron quickly clarified.

“In order to be summoned the soul of the person would still have to be tied to the earthly plane which Voldemort tried to do using the horcrux. Thankfully we destroyed all of them before killing him.” Harry added, disregarding the way everyone seemed to flinch at the name. 

“So who the hell else would they even want to summon?” Jenkins asked. 

“We don’t know. That’s why we’re here-“ Harry argued before the head auror cut him off. 

“I don’t give a rats ass who the hell it is! I wants these bastards put away before the minister comes for my neck. Potter, Weasley go get the agents from the department of mysteries and see if they can shed some light on the circle. Everyone else, I want you combing the streets and knocking on doors to find Dolohov and Macnair. I want these bastards caught damn it!” Robards seethed before walking to his office and slamming the door shut. 

The wizards scattered, immediately jumping into action. 

____ 

Three weeks later

“One last sacrifice and our work shall be complete.” Dolohov muttered as he drew the last summoning circle, his eyes going back and forth between his book and the circle as he tried to ensure every character was perfect. 

The slightest mistake or imperfection would be disastrous and they couldn’t take that risk after coming so far. 

Macnair barely paid him any mind, his eyes trained on their last sacrificial lamb. The poor muggle didn’t have their wits about them. Not anymore, not after the torture they’d already endured. 

“This better fucking work.” Dolohov grumbled as he finally stood up to look at his handy work. He went over every single mark and sigil before shutting his book. 

The preparations were complete. 

_____

Harry barely had the strength to keep standing as he took the floo back to Grimmauld Place. 

He walked into the living room and collapsed on a couch unwilling to move even an inch. He didn’t even have it in him to change and allowed his magic to remove his shoes before closing his eyes. 

He didn’t even bother to look up when he heard the hearth roar to life as Merlin came home. 

The past month had been nothing short of chaotic. 

It was the first week of December and while December was always a chaotic month with the holidays just around the corner and everyone trying to prepare for the end of year in what always felt like a mad dash but this year was mental. 

Merlin sighed as he collapsed on the love seat across from Harry, his breathing still haggard after the chaos of the day. 

“Please tell me your home tonight? I need a night in.” Harry begged as he turned to look at Merlin. 

The poor sorcerer looked about as dead on his feet as Harry felt. 

“God yes I’m not leaving this bloody house. What is with all the bloody raids? I mean I’ve spent a week healing injury after injury-“ Merlin ranted as he forced himself to sit up. 

Harry sighed and nodded, he couldn’t blame him there wasn’t a person in his department that wasn’t sick and tired of the bloody mess. 

“We haven’t got a single lead on Dolohov and Macnair, it’s like they’ve bloody disappeared out of existence. Robards is getting pressure from the top down so at-least with the raids it looks like we’re going after something.” Harry explained, the frustration in his voice obvious at the whole situation. 

He’d barely been home all month, between all the raids, the senseless meetings with ministry officials and working the case every second of every day it was like he didn’t have a moment to breath. 

He’d barely seen his friends, he hadn’t seen Draco in two weeks, hell he lived with Merlin and other than a quick run in here and there he had barely spoken to him at all. 

He sighed as he raked his hand through his hair as the frustration began to get to him. Things at the ministry hadn’t been this bad since the last war and the wizard was anxious to have this mess be done with already. 

Merlin sighed and walked over to the other boy and forced him to sit up and make room for him on the couch. 

“Harry be easier on yourself. I mean this will pass, you’ll find them before long and lock them away. You’re a brilliant auror and a damn good wizard. You’re the master of death for gods sake so stop beating yourself up and get your head out of your ass.” Merlin prompted gently as he reached up to tap his cheek lightly.  

Harry couldn’t help but chuckle. Only Merlin could make him feel better while also chastising him like a toddler. 

“Alright alright I’ll be a proper adult and handle it tomorrow. Now hurry up and tell me how you’re liking St. Mungo’s? I can’t be the only one complaining about work.” Harry prompted making Merlin laugh. 

“It’s honestly been really nice-“

“Don’t tell ‘Mione she’ll never let you live it down!” Harry joked making Merlin laugh. The other wizard always knew just what he was thinking. 

“Don’t even get me started! I swear every time she sees me getting on well at the hospital she gets this shit eating grin-“ Merlin ranted as Harry laughed. 

“Like she knows she’s right about everything? God it drives me mental!” Harry added, it was nice getting to watch someone other than him and Ron have to deal with her specific brand of crazy. 

“The worst is that she’s always bloody right? I mean I don’t think there’s been a single damn time that she wasn’t! I honestly don’t know how she does it!” Merlin admitted in awe of the young witch. 

In all his years he had never seen a witch that was so cunning and clever, her intelligence and skills were truly breathtaking. The more time he spent with her the more he had come to respect her and couldn’t imagine his life without her. 

Harry couldn’t help but chuckle, seeing the way Merlin fit in with his friends, the way he was finally making a life for himself again filled him with so much pride. 

“I wish I knew, I swear she’s something else. You know she’s been researching summoning circles to try and help us on top of working and managing the kids? I mean I can’t blame her I don’t know what we’d do without the input.” Harry had been meaning to talk to Merlin about the damn things for weeks himself but hadn’t had the chance. Ron on the other hand was getting lectures and random notes in his pockets and lunch boxes so often he was going mad. 

“Oh I’m aware, I hear about them all day every day. Last week she tried to convince me to cast one so we could learn how they operate.” Merlin pinched the bridge of his nose at the damned memory. The two of them had ended up having a solid row about the ethics of preforming illegal magic for the greater good.

Harry laughed wholeheartedly at the idea. Only Hermione would think to solve a problem by committing a crime before the “real” criminals get the chance. 

“Have you ever? Used one that is?” Harry asked curiously. 

“Yeah, a few times, but they take a lot of magic and the sacrifice needs to be equivalent to the summoning and anything more or less could led to serious consequences. Truth be told it was a relief when they were criminalized.” Merlin shrugged. 

Harry nodded, before sighing and laying down so he could rest his head on Merlin’s lap. 

“Don’t worry too much about this Harry after all I’ll be right here to help.” The sorcerer chuckled as he pet the boys hair. 

Harry smiled and nodded he knew Merlin was right about this but he couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something about this felt off. He’d felt it every time he found the remains of the circles, the moment he stepped into the building it was like a sudden clarity would come over him. Like it was his intuition telling him that whatever magic this was, it wasn’t natural. And then there was the flash of emotions, like someone was using occlumency to try and communicate with him but all he could get was a blast of feelings. 

Harry sat up suddenly his eyes catching Merlin’s worried ones immediately. “Have you ever- this is going to sound mental but- have you ever had premonitions?”

Merlin’s eyes widened but he nodded all the same. “They’re common for those with strong divination abilities. Why do you ask?”  

Harry nodded, that made sense but he’d never been too drawn to divination all things considered. Then again what else could that feeling be?

“I… when we’re at the summoning sites I just get this wave of energy come over me. It’s like there’s something very wrong about the place and I can’t seem to shake this feeling that I can sense something.” Harry tried to explain but felt he wasn’t doing a very good job. 

Merlin for his part looked pensive, not scared or concerned and Harry couldn’t help but feel relieved. After all historically he was always made to feel crazy whenever something felt wrong. 

“What does it feel like? If you had to describe it?” Merlin asked gently his eyes fixed on his friend. 

“That’s the weird thing Em. I … it feels like a person. It’s like I can feel her there, alone and scared and frustrated. But she feels real somehow?” Harry tried to explain but saying it out loud made him feel even crazier than before. 

“Did it seem familiar?” Merlin asked, wondering if maybe he was somehow feeling death and her residual magic somehow through their bond. 

Harry shook his head. “No not at all. What do you think it could mean?”

Merlin shrugged as he tried to think long and hard about a similar experience in his past but he was drawing a blank. “Did you feel … like you were in danger?”

“Are you asking me if my spidey sense was tingling?” Harry joked, pleased that he succeeded in making Merlin laugh. 

“Does this mean I can get you some colourful spandex? Honestly though Harry many magically inclined people have heightened senses and maybe you’re sensing someone that’s linked to these crimes? A prisoner maybe?” Merlin offered. 

“A future sacrifice?” Harry hypothesized. 

“One that you’ll be able to save.” Merlin assured his hand reaching for Harry cheek. The boy sighed and nodded. 

“I hope you’re right Em’.”

———

She felt like she was floating. Maybe she was and maybe she wasn’t. Maybe both were somehow true and yet not at all. 

But she was alone. 

She had slumbered here forever. 

No, not forever. 

There had been so much before this. She remembered the anger, the rage and the fury.

She remembered the fear and the pain. 

She remembered what she had and what she’d lost. 

She remembered all the regrets she had.

But it had been so long ago and in the hollow loneliness of space and time there was nothing for her to do but think. 

And slumber. 

And yet here she was, her consciousness aware that something was trying to rouse her from her slumber. 

She did not like the disruptions. 

And yet they seemed to be succeeding somehow. 

After all she was waking. 

Her eyes opened suddenly, like a shocked terror from a long lost dream coursed through her pushing her forward. 

She woke surrounded by fire and blood.

There were people there, speaking words she couldn’t understand but she was slow to turn her attention to them. Not when she looked down to see her body returned to her. 

She was not only awake. 

She was alive. 

Chapter Text

Merlin groaned as he felt his body being shaken awake, unable to entirely comprehend what was happening.

“Em wake up! We have to go!” Harry demanded, the shrillness in his voice forcing Merlin to sit up.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong?” He asked as he stifled a yawn.

“They found a summoning circle! A complete one, I need you to take a look!” Harry exclaimed. Merlin’s eyes widened and he jumped out of bed to get ready.

Before long the men were apparating to what seemed to be an abandoned warehouse in Leeds.

There were aurors swarming every inch of the place already and the boys shared a look before hurrying into the building.

“Potter, what the hell are you doing bringing a civilian onto my crime scene?!” Robards demanded the second he laid eyes on the men. Harry swore under his breath he should have put Merlin under his cloak but in his haste he had forgotten.

“Sir he’s an expert on ancient runes and I thought he’d be able to help us translate the images in the circle.” Harry lied through his teeth hoping the man would buy it.

Just in time to save their neck Ron ran out of the building towards them.

“Thank fuck you brought him. We need to know what the hell this is but it doesn’t look good!” Ron exclaimed.

Robards eyed all three men wearily before sighing and leading them inside. He had learned a long time ago that Weasley and Potter had their own way of doing things and thus far he’d learned it best to trust their judgment. 

“Fine fine, but if you think I’m taking my eyes off him you’re nuts!”

Merlin tried to smile at the auror in the hopes that it would put his mind at ease but the man just glared. They entered the building and Robards led them up a set of stairs to a balcony that overlooked the main floor.

“We found it an hour ago, there’s some fire damage but not like the others. We were clued off by a strong magical signature but it was abandoned before we arrived. We’ve already called the DOM but they’ll take a while to get here.” Robards advised as they made their way up the stairs.

Merlin didn’t need the head auror to tell him that there had been strong magic used in this place, he could feel it, the scent of ozone and petrichor was everywhere and he could feel the sting of an ancient magic in the air. 

Something about it stood out to him but no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t quite put his fingers on it.

As they reached the overhanging platform Merlin walked towards the safety rail and gasped.

His eyes traced the runes in the circle once then twice then a third time before his hand raised to cover his lips. He didn’t even realize his hand was shaking, his eyes unable to move from the circle as the thoughts in his mind whirled like a tornado. This couldn’t be happening. It shouldn’t be possible and yet the proof was right there before his eyes.

“Em? What is it?” Harry asked suddenly with panic in his voice at seeing the sorcerer so shaken.

“This is bad, this is bad. This is so so bad.” He mumbled more to himself than anyone in particular, his eyes still frozen at the symbol painted across the center of the circle underneath a pool of blood.

“Hey you’re not making much fucking sense! Potter, why'd you bring him if he can’t handle some blood?” Robards started shouting, as he glanced at the aurors who were now exchanging terrified glances as they watched Merlin. He froze as he looked between the men confused, he had never seen either man this scared, whatever was happening had to be bad.

Suddenly the sorcerer turned to face them all. “How many of them have you found!? I need to know!” He demanded.

“12.” Ron advised before Robards could protest.

“That’s confidential Weasley what the hell are you-“

“You’re sure it’s 12?! You have to be certain!” Merlin demanded his voice shrill.

“This one’s number 13 Em’.” Harry advised, his green eyes pinning him in place. “What does that mean for us?”

Merlin raked his hand through his hair, his body shaking as the reality of the situation finally set in. “It means we’re screwed. They’ve succeeded in bringing her back, that’s why they abandoned it. We can’t stop them, it’s too late.”

A cold chill passed the three Aurors.

“What the fuck did they summon exactly?” Ron asked, his voice strained as he watched his friend closely. “The symbols must tell you? I mean you do know what they say don’t you?”

Merlin nodded, his eyes falling back on the circle briefly, the blood wasn’t enough to stop him from being able to see the symbols clear as day. “This circle is to summon a priestess of the triple goddess. The last priestess.”

“Is that supposed to mean anything cause I don’t like fucking riddles thanks.” Robards exclaimed only to be met with Merlin’s piercing glare. It froze the man in his tracks.

“It means that Morgana Pendragon has returned.”

——

“This place is not like anything I’ve seen before.” Morgana remarked as she sat back against her chair as if it were a throne while a small group of wizards groveled before her.

They hadn’t started out groveling, no they had started by bringing her here and using some sort of magic on her. Suddenly she was able to comprehend their words and vice versa. She hadn’t minded that all too much but then they’d had the audacity to make demands of her which was of course their first mistake.

How pathetic.

So what option did she have left but to force them to their knees with magic far more powerful and ancient than they had ever seen.

What foolish little men they were.

Morgana smiled as she watched a few of them fight against their bindings, some looked more like beasts than men. Their beastly leader seemed especially displeased with her and was screaming insults and vulgarities at her as loudly as he could manage.

Her eyes glowed as her magic forced his head to freeze, and his eyes locked on hers. With a snap of her fingers and the whisper of a spell he was unable to pry his mouth open to speak no matter how hard he tried. His muffled screams had the delightful effect of forcing all the other silly little men around him to bite their tongues.

Finally she pointed to one. “Tell me why you’ve revived me?”

Dolohov swallowed, his mind going a mile a minute as he tried to find a way to spin this in his own favor. “My lady, we are your loyal subjects! We have worked tirelessly these many years to return you to the land of the living. We hoped that you, the great champion for all witches and wizards would help us. My lady, we beg of you to help us!”

Behind him the rest of the men began to beg alongside him in earnest.

Morgana raised her hand to silence them.

“How long have I been dead? Are we in Albion? This land looks entirely unfamiliar to me.” She asked with an arch of her brow. Her eyes scanning over the men, their clothes were strangely fashioned, this castle they inhabited was like nothing she had ever seen and no matter where she turned she was met with unfamiliarity.

“W-we are in A-albion my lady but we do not call it by that name anymore. You see it’s been over a m-millennia since your untimely death.” He stuttered, his eyes shutting as he waited with bated breath for Morgana to respond.

“A millennia!?” Morgana screamed, her hands clenching the arms of her chair as a terrifying horror dawned on her. “What about Camelot!?”

Another wizard, this time one of the beastly looking men interjected. “It’s long gone my lady, the kingdom fell to time at-least 1300 years ago.”

Morgana’s very blood froze in her veins, unable to comprehend the magnitude of what he was telling her. How could she? Everything she had ever known was lost. Everything she had worked so hard to gain, to conquer, to fight for was all long gone?

“Then why exactly have you brought me here?” She demanded as her eyes bore into each of the men. Why would she have been summoned if not to rule Camelot and with it all of Albion.

There was silence in the room as she waited for her answer. They had summoned her after all, to do so was foolhardy at best and not even idiots take such risks unless of course they’re desperate.

“Well?” She asked pointedly as she narrowed her gaze at the sniveling men.

“We need your help my lady! We need you to free us from the tyranny of the ministry. We’ve gone to war against them twice already and now we are doomed to live at the mercy of the muggles. We’re forced to hide in fear for our lives for fear that they will kill us all!” Dolohov pleaded.

Morgana’s eyes widened, her mind taking her back to the tyranny of her father’s reign.

“Please my lady, you fought for our freedoms before! We beg you to help us!” One of the other men begged and the others joined in with their pleading.

Morgana fell back against her chair as she regarded the men before her. They looked desperate enough for their pleas to be possible but the witch had learned long ago not to trust anyone but herself.

Her heart clenched at the thought of the many betrayals she had suffered. No, she would not trust them, but that didn’t mean they had to know that.

She smiled, they would be the perfect pawns. Hers to use until she was done with them and then she’d get rid of them.

“Well, consider this your lucky day boys.” Her smile was dangerously cutting.

_____

“M-m-Morgana!? Merlin, please tell me you’re joking!” Ron exclaimed, as all three men stared at the sorcerer in horror.

“No way no fucking way! You’re wrong, it's not possible! She’s been long dead.” Robards shouted. “How the hell would that be possible! You can’t resurrect people from the dead!”

“Maybe she wasn’t dead?” Harry asked, his eyes trained on Merlin waiting for him to lend some type of clarity.

“She was dead.” He replied with a firm gaze as he recalled the memory. “I killed her myself after the battle at Camlann. She’s a priestess of the triple goddess so she can’t die by magic or poison. No mortal blade can pierce her skin. It’s not something one forgets easily.”

If Robards head could explode at that exact moment it would have. “WHAT THE FUCK IS HE TALKING ABOUT POTTER?!” He shouted as he grabbed Harry by the collar and pulled him close so he could look him in the fucking eye.

Harry swallowed, his gaze flickering to Ron and then Merlin. He watched the sorcerer give him a small nod. The jig was up and there was no point hiding it. 

“He’s Merlin. The you know? From the myth? I found him in Avalon.” Harry offered as an explanation as Ron hit his palm to his head in abject horror. Leave it to Harry to deliver the information without an ounce of thought. 

Robards didn’t say a word and somehow that was more frightening. He just nodded once, let go of Harry’s robe and then turned and grabbed Ron by his before pulling him to look him dead in the eye.

“What. the. hell. is your friend talking about?!” He demanded but all Ron could do was flinch and shrug.

“It’s true.” Merlin interjected. He allowed his magic to course through him and suddenly every light in the building went out and then suddenly sparked back to life again. The gold of his eyes froze the head Auror in his tracks. The rest of the Aurors were now running around in a flurry of activity trying to understand what just occurred but Robards eyes were locked on the wizard before him, unwilling to accept what he was hearing and seeing. 

“Sir he really is him. We wouldn’t exactly lie about something like this, especially now! I mean all things considered shouldn’t we just be lucky he’s here?” Ron offered hoping that the head auror would finally move again. He still hadn’t blinked and that couldn’t possibly be a good sign.

Robards turned to look at Ron for a moment, then at Harry before his gaze finally landed on Merlin once more. He put his fingers to his wrist and pinched it until he was sure it would bruise. He was still there. This was not a dream.

“You lot are going to drive me to an early fucking grave! For fucks sake!” He finally exclaimed and Harry and Ron breathed a momentary sigh of relief that he hadn’t had a heart attack.

“Em’ how did you kill her last time?” Harry asked suddenly.

“Have you just been alive this whole fucking time?!” Robards demanded his head still whirling.

Merlin rolled his eyes. “Yes I have, now will you please focus? I know Morgana is back, I can feel her magic all over the damned place and we need a plan.”

“You think she’ll try to kill everyone or something?” Robards asked while suddenly wishing he’d paid any type of attention to his history of magic classes. Then again no one prepared him for the possible resurrection of a long dead dark witch while at Hogwarts or the aurors academy.

“No clue, but if she’s with a bunch of death eaters I can’t exactly imagine there being a positive outcome here.” Merlin explained, still unwilling to accept that he would see her again. On one hand he was dreading seeing her, he couldn’t imagine this going well by any means but on the other hand a part of him, a hopeless pathetic part of him longed to see her once again. He could remember her face but the sound of her voice, the way she laughed, the nuances that made her who she was had been lost to the sands of time as his memory had faded. 

He had often thought that he would give anything to see her again one last time but now that he was faced with the possibility he was entirely torn.

His memory recalled her death suddenly, his mind reminding him of who she had become, what she had done. He had held her in his arms as the light faded from her eyes and she had been just as betrayed as the day he had poisoned her. The day he started her down her terrifying descent into madness and cruelty.

He had killed her once and yet a part of him feared that he would not be able to do so again but as he looked up, his eyes locked with Harry’s. He knew he didn’t want to do this but what choice did he have when he had so much to protect.

“So what do we do?” Harry asked. Ron nodded, both men were standing at attention, their eyes meeting momentarily as though a decision had been made between them. They stood strong as though they were ready to strike. If this would turn into a battle then so be it, they were ready to fight if that's what it would take to protect their friends, their family, and their world.

“We need to find a way to kill her.” Ron stated, his voice unwavering under the threat that loomed over head.

“I thought you said you killed her? Did you forget how or something?” Robards interjected as he finally got up to speed despite being unable to accept everything he was hearing.

“I remember it just fine, thanks.” Merlin clapped back before taking a breath and trying to calm his racing heart. “I ran her through with Excalibur.”

“I thought you said a blade can’t-“ Ron began.

“Excalibur in no mortal blade, it was tempered in the fires of the great dragon and was capable of killing her. Unfortunately, it was laid to rest with Arthur so it’s not exactly an option so we need to think of something else. Shes far more powerful then a regular witch or wizard so even capturing her isn’t something you lot will be able to do alone.” Merlin explained.

“Em … she can’t actually kill you … can she?” Harry asked, suddenly terrified of what this could mean.

“It’s certainly possible, I mean if anyone can find a way to destroy me then its her.” Merlin admitted honestly much to Harry’s horror.

“You can’t fight her-“ Harry began before Merlin interjected. 

“Listen Morgana is powerful but she’s not a violent fool trying to satisfy her bloodlust. We won't be able to kill her so our best bet is me trying to make her see reason.” Merlin offered.

“You really think she’s going to let go of you MURDERING HER?” Ron shouted as he was tempted to shake Merlin out of his own stupidity.

“Maybe if he explains he didn’t have a choice? I mean you must have had a good reason right? I mean how angry at you could she really be?” Harry offered but the way Merlin flinched caused him to recoil. Merlin still hadn’t met his eye even as he began to speak.

“We…There's a lot of bad blood there. I was also responsible for killing her sister which she’s probably more…upset about…and then there was the time I poisoned her….” Merlin noted. The three Aurors paused to look at Merlin expectantly for an explanation.

“I was trying to protect Arthur! And I was young and stupid alright?! I didn’t think that…that she would become what she did!” Merlin argued despite knowing deep down that her anger, her rage, the darkness that had consumed her was a by-product of his own actions. She was a consequence of his own mistakes, he could not blame her for what she became…only himself. 

Robards groaned as he ran his hand through his hair for what felt like the millionth time that morning. “Okay so I doubt that plan of yours is going to work. So what’s the alternative? We make another magical sword? Or can we go collect Excalibur or something?”

“You want to rob King Arthur’s grave!?” Ron shrieked, he was feeling more and more light headed as this conversation continued, the last thing they needed was to be cursed for grave robbing next.

“That won’t work, they were laid to rest in lake Avalon. You can’t just swim into the lake and find them-“ Merlin interjected, hoping to dissuade them from taking an even more dangerous step.

“Sir we have a problem! Some unknown witch is attacking Diagon Ally and she seems to be accompanied by Dolohov, Macnair, Greyback and a group of death eaters!” Auror Miller shouted as she ran up the stairs two at a time. She was panting by the time she reached the top. “S-she says she’s h-here to rule A-albion as our Q-queen?” 

Merlin crossed his arms tightly as he tried to think of a plan. Any plan would do but he needed to think of something.

“I can try and subdue her. If we have magical restriction cuffs I can try and capture her and then we can figure out what to do next.” Merlin offered but Harry shook his head.

“What if she tries to kill you? What do we do then?” Harry demanded.

“It’s our only option, Harry.” Merlin sighed as he saw the fear in Harry’s eyes he sighed and reached for his cheek in the hopes it would calm him. “And if I’m in any real danger I’m sure you’ll find a way to save me. You always do.”

Harry nodded as the other three Aurors watched on.

“Well then, let’s hope all of us live to see tomorrow.” Robards added before they apparated to Diagon Alley.

———

Diagon Alley was in chaos when they arrived. That was to be expected, they were two weeks out from the holidays and the street even at 10 am in the morning was busy with shoppers with many more expected to arrive within the next few hours. As far as terrible timing was concerned this was as bad as it could get. All of the would-be shoppers were entirely unaware of the fact that they were in grave danger the moment they tried to enter the street and there was no way to stop them quickly enough. 

Morgana on the other hand, had decided to create a large throne made of the roots of a tree in the center of the street. The tree itself had appeared seemingly out of nowhere with the use of the witches' magic and it now towered the street, its branches looked ancient and knotted hanging over the throne. Its roots made a raised platform where Morgana could languish on her throne as the death eaters she now commanded caused general chaos. Despite her relaxed posture her eyes watched the death eaters closely while taking in her surroundings with a calculating eye. 

She had warned the idiotic men she would not permit them to kill until she commanded it, after all this trip was for simple reconnaissance as she got the lay of the land. It was curious though, this place, whatever it was, seemed filled with magic. It was everywhere she looked, from the people in the streets to the shops  themselves and their many displays. 

These people were clearly her people but…they did not seem to be persecuted. At least not as far as she could tell.

Magic seemed to be practiced freely here. How curious. 

__

There were aurors everywhere, some trying to pull people out of the streets and usher them home while others tried to subdue the death eaters without much luck. In the distance Merlin could see George at his shop ushering witches and wizards into the safety of the building. His wand drawn and his eyes locked on Morgana ready to attack if needed.

Merlin knew he had to hurry before one of his friends was embroiled in a battle. He would protect them, he had to. 

The moment Merlin laid eyes on Morgana he made to run towards her but Harry’s hand on his arm pulled him back.

“Promise me you won’t die. Promise me you won’t let her kill you!” Harry begged, he was unable to help himself at that moment. He knew Merlin like the back of his hand, he knew he’d sacrifice himself in a heartbeat. It may have been selfish but he didn’t care, he couldn’t lose Merlin. He couldn’t watch him die.

Tears came to Merlin’s eyes as he nodded and pulled Harry close and hugged him tight. “I love you so very much Harry.”

“I love you too.” Harry said as he hugged him tight and prayed that this not be the last time.

Merlin pulled back and hugged Ron next. “Give her hell.” He whispered.

Merlin nodded and then dove into the crowd towards Morgana.

Robards grabbed Harry suddenly before he could chase after him. “You said you found him in Avalon didn’t you?!”

Harry nodded his attention clearly still on Merlin. “Yeah so what?”

“Go get the fucking sword you idiot! She looks bat shit crazy and we need a fucking way to fucking stop her!” Robards yelled as he finally got through Harry’s thick skull.

“I can’t exactly- it’ll take too long and- oh my god I have an idea!” Harry shouted.

“I don’t give a shit just go!” Robards yelled before running into action himself. Harry nodded and ran into an alley between two stores, his hand reaching for his amulet.

He closed his eyes to call for her and when he opened them she was there before him.

“My lord, I was expecting you. It is time but it seems you’re alone, we still need another.” Death noted as she looked at Harry and around him as though there should be someone else there.

“Amaya we don’t have time for riddles. Morgana is back and she’s going to try and kill Merlin we need to get Excalibur!” Harry begged but death's eyes were trained past him on the street beyond.

“Not until he arrives. You will not be able to take this journey alone my lord.” She answered cryptically. Just as Harry considered shaking her until she made sense he heard his name.

“Potter, what the hell are you doing back here!” Draco shouted as he ran into the ally after having chased him moments earlier.

He froze when he saw the woman in front of Harry. “Who the hell-“

“Draco Lucius Malfoy. I have been waiting for you. There is not much time to waste so we must hurry.” She explained with a smile. “Take my hand, it is time you return to Avalon my lord.” She said to Harry.

“Lord? Avalon? What the fuck-“ Draco shouted but Harry took her hand without second thought before his eyes locked onto Draco’s.

“Let’s go.” He stated. Draco swallowed and looked between them in confusion but the look in Harry’s eyes stopped him from protesting. Whatever the man was about to do, Draco wasn’t about to let him do it alone. He took the strange woman’s hand and was spirited away by death herself.

Chapter Text

Merlin pushed his way through the crowd, his wand drawn with Ron at his side as they made their way towards Morgana’s throne. Ron ran out in front of him, hoping he could keep Morgana from noticing Merlin in the crowd. Unfortunately, Greyback spotted him almost immediately and Ron didn't hesitate to meet him spell for spell as they dueled while Merlin ran past him. 

A shiver ran down Merlin’s spine and he looked up to see her eyes locked onto him. Their eyes met and they both froze. Not a word was spoken, nor was any move made; they just stopped as though time itself had stopped them. 

Morgana's eyes narrowed as the pain of her long gone past coursed through her. He didn’t look the same, his clothing was strange, his hair unfamiliar, he didn’t look like himself in many ways. But it was him. 

She could never forget those eyes, the ones she would look to in the chaos of Camelot to remind herself she was not alone. Back when she could be a girl and him just a boy, before they became what they were today. The same eyes she’d spent her final moments staring into hoping to find a reason or an answer after suffering what felt like yet another betrayal. 

They were the same eyes, he was the same boy he had always been. And yet the set of his shoulders, the tilt of his lips and even the look in those clear blue eyes told her that he wasn’t the same. She had always thought she had known how to read his face well, but what she saw as he looked back at her made little sense. 

As Merlin gazed up at her, it was as though he was relieved to see her. 

She forced her heart to harden, she could not trust him, she knew better than that. That stupid girl she had once been was long dead and the universe had been kind enough to give her one final opportunity to seek her vengeance. The triple goddess had finally rewarded her for her millennia of patient penance in the emptiness of space and time. She would not waste this opportunity doing something as foolish as letting herself get caught up in his manipulations.  

She stood up and raised her hand just as he raised his wand and their magic collided with such force that every witch and wizard in the vicinity froze as they watched, unable to look away. 

The following battle was ruthless, Morgana waged war against the sorcer with spell after spell and attack after attack. Merlin did nothing but defend against them as he made his way up onto the platform, his conscious unwilling to attack her depite the fury with which she tried to destroy him.

“Please Morgana! We don't need to do this! We don't need to keep fighting, I’m begging you!” Merlin shouted as he deflected another of her attacks. She was panting under the force of the magic she was expending to battle him but was unwilling to stop. 

She glared back at him, her hair blowing in the frigid winter winds behind her. “I am no fool Emrys I will not let you deceive me! Not Again!” She screamed in return before raising her hand and whispering another spell. 

Merlin shielded himself from it as he tried to hold her off, out of the corner of his eyes he could see Ron struggling to battle three wizards at once. He turned and whispered a spell under his breath, his magic throwing two of them towards Gringotts. 

The split second of distraction was all Morgana needed to try and kill him. Yet, as Merlin turned back to look at her he was not hurt. 

Only when their eyes met once more did Morgana attack him, this time conjuring a dozen swords to fly towards his head.  

Merlin hurried to deflect them, the force of his magic causing them to scatter and fall on the ground between them. Morgana grabbed one of the fallen sword in one hand, she raised it to point at Merlin. 

“What game is it that you’re playing Emrys? Do you think me a fool to fall for your trickery? The fates have brought us together for a reason after all! And what reason might that be then to finally end your reign of terror?!” Morgana snarled.

“Terror?! What terror Morgana?! I know not what those men have told you but you have been gone from this world for 1500 hundred years! Look around you, open your eyes for gods sake and see what has become of our people! They live, they thrive! They can live a good and free life, free to do their magic without fear! What exactly is it that you wish for my lady? To rule? Or to destory?!” Merlin argued as he pointed at their surroundings. 

Morgana seethed, the rage in her chest unquenched as he attacked Merlin again and again and again, the magic lashing out to attack him over and over as she screamed at him to die. 

“It is your death I want Emrys! It is time for you to die for your sins!” She screamed as she attacked him again, all the while growing more and more frustrated. Why the hell was he not fighting back? 

Why wont he fight her!? Why wouldn’t he just show his true colours so that she could finally destory him once and for all? 

Morgana froze as he did it again. He looked away, his attention diverted once again as he looked back into the crowd. Was he truly stupid enough to leave her another opening? No. No he wasn’t. It had to be a trap. 

Merlin’s mind reeled as he saw Hermione join the fight occurring behind him before he turned his attention back to Morgana once more. He had given her an opening and she still hadn’t taken it. Maybe… just maybe there was still hope. 

She attacked him the second their eyes met, this time when Merlin deflected he allowed his spell to fail at the last moment and let her magic hit him. He screamed as he fell to his knees but he forced his eyes open to meet hers. She did not take her eyes off him as he writhed and screamed in pain. She didn’t smile as he expected or laugh. She did not seem to take joy in it as he feared she might. 

As the effect of the spell faded he fell to the ground, the roots of the tree doing little to break his fall. He forced himself to sit up as he waited for her to attack again but she didn’t. Instead she waited as he slowly forced himself to stand. From behind him he heard Hermione’s voice scream his name but he paid it no mind, his eyes remaining trained on Morgana. Around them the snow began to fall gently in the air, uncaring of the battle that was being waged on the ground. 

Hermione and Ron were trying to get to him but every time they got close another one of the death eaters would attack them. 

Finally Merlin stood firm on his feet, his wand still in hand, as he waited for Morgana to attack him once more. 

“How is it that you live? Tell me Emrys, you must know how you and I have found ourselves here after all this time?” Morgana queried as she stood back waiting for an answer, an explanation or at least an attack. 

Instead Merlin shrugged, the exasperated grin on his face ill-fitting as he laughed. She had known the sound of his laughter so well once and this was not his laughter… no, this was unnatural. 

“Your guess is as good as mine Morgana!” He shouted as his hands raised as though he hadn’t a clue what to tell her. “I am here because I am alive even after all this time and yet I do not know for what purpose.” Merlin flinched as the pain bled through to his voice. 

“I do not believe you!” She snapped back as she attacked him again. This time the roots of the tree lashed out against him, attacking him one after the other like the tentacles of an octopus while she continued to fire one spell after another at him. 

Merlin screamed as one of the roots slammed down against his back catching him off guard, throwing him down onto the ground before he turned to imobalize the entire tree by freezing it in a hold of ice. 

“WHY WONT YOU ATTACK ME!” She screamed as she cast another spell to blast Merlin with ball after ball of fire. Merlin shielded himself from one after another before finally letting the last one collide with his chest. 

“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” She demanded, screaming in frustration. Merlin cried out, his hand holding his chest as he tried to breathe through the pain. Every time he sustained an attack he was sure he could see a look of concern cross her features and for that split second he didn’t mind bearing the torturous pain of her attacks. 

He gasped and coughed as he pushed himself up onto one knee before he finally looked back at her. He smiled, he couldn’t help it. “It is good…to see you again…my lady.”

Tears flooded her eyes as her face mutated into one of disgust. To think that he would play with her emotions was too cruel for her to fathom. To think that the bumbling fool of a boy she had once known and cared for was capable of such deceit was hard for her to stomach. 

“Do not lie to me Emrys.” She ordered though it sounded less like a threat and more like a plea.

Merlins smile fell as a softness fell over his eyes, she hated when others would look at her with pity. She would not be pitied by him. Never by him. 

She whispered another spell and the swords at her feet flew back at him, his eyes flashed gold as he deflected them but one still got past him, cutting into the flesh of his left arm as it grazed past. He shouted out in pain as he reached for the wound, putting pressure on it instinctively but doing nothing to heal the injury. 

“I have no reason to lie to you Morgana. Look around. Everything we have known and loved, everyone we ever knew is long gone. They have been gone a long long time. Can you truly blame me for being happy at the sight of an old friend?” He asked kindly, the way he used to when he would offer her flowers to cheer her up after a nightmare. 

“We. are. not. FRIENDS. YOU HAVE POISONED ME, YOU HAVE TAKEN FROM ME EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER LOVED, YOU STOLE EVERYTHING FROM ME AND THEN TOOK MY LIFE. HOW DARE YOU?” The witch demanded as she used her magic to attack him again and again. 

Tears fell from Merlin’s eyes as her very pain seemed to radiate throughout the air. As she screamed, the betrayal fresh on her mind just as it was his despite all the time that had passed between them. How could she ever trust him? How could he ever expect her too in the face of all of his own sins. 

He did not bother to wipe away the tears as he forced himself to stand back up and look back at her with determination. He was not the same boy he had once been, he could bear the brunt of her anger now… that would be his penance. 

He prayed that whatever happen next, that Harry was not there to witness this. 

“I do not blame you for your hatred Morgana. I can not. What I did to you was… You have to believe me that I never wanted for it to happen that way!” He begged, the tears still coming to his eyes as his own guilt tore away at him. 

“And yet it did.” She retorted before attacking him once again. 

Merlin continued to deflect her attacks once again but this time, rather than letting one hit him he left her another opening. If she wanted to try and kill him then so be it, he would not fight to stop her. 

This time when Morgana saw the opening an unexplainable fury took over her, she was sick and fucking tired of being played with like a silly toy. She didn’t care what trap he set, it did not matter. She raised one hand to the heavens and her other to Merlin as she screamed one final spell to end this once and for all. The spell she cast hit Merlin directly and just as she hoped the spell pulled Merlins magic from his body rendering him defenseless. 

He screamed in agony as the very magic that made him was ripped from his body and funneled into the heavens, the ray of light it created blinding as the witches and wizards around them were helpless but to stare. Their bodies frozen in shock at seeing Merlins magic paint the skys in rays of light. 

Hermione shook herself from her wonder as she shielded her eyes with a spell and ran towards Merlin as fast as her legs could carry her. She screamed the words of her spell as her magic deflected Morgana’s away from Merlin. He crumbled to the ground, his head slamming back against the icy roots beneath him. He cried out in pain, his mind dazed and his vision white from the force of the impact. He turned just in time to see Hermione run up onto the platform and towards Morgana. His eyes flashed gold with the little remaining magic he had and pushed her back into the crowd towards Ron. 

He wouldn’t let her get hurt, no…this was his cross to bear alone. 

Morgana stood back unable to comprehend what she had just witnessed. He had let her hit him with her spell. He hadn’t even tried to fight back. He had welcomed it wholeheartedly. 

She watched as he fought to regain consciousness, his body twisting and turning until he could see her before collapsing once more. She didn’t know what to do, she expected him to fight, to battle her with every fiber of his being. She expected him to be the ruthless monster she wished him to be. 

Merlin pushed himself up on his knees, his breathing haggard, his mind dazed. He tried to breathe, to regain his bearings but he was beginning to wonder if there was even a point in trying. He smiled as he looked at the confused wonder on Morgana's face. She almost looked like she cared about him. 

He had always been a gambling man and the concern on her face was worth betting on. 

He thought of Arthur and begged that if he was wrong that the fates would finally re-unite them. 

“MORGANA IF MY LIFE IS WHAT YOU WANT THEN YOU CAN HAVE IT.” He shouted as loud as he could. 

Morgana glared, her eyes not moving from the sorcerers figure, trying to predict what he was up to this time.   

Merlin gazed sadly back at her before he continued. “I know, I am responsible for all the pain that you have suffered. I know that what I did to you was wrong. I should have trusted you, I should have helped you as you came into your power. I was your friend and yet I was unable to protect you. I failed you my lady.” Merlin raised his hands before closing them behind his back in clear surrender. 

Morgana shook her head unwilling to believe what he was doing, what he was saying. 

“I was young and inexperienced, I was desperate to protect Arthur and prove myself. I made many mistakes. There was so much happening and I wanted to protect us all but I never knew what to do and I made many mistakes hoping that all would work out and with the best of intentions. But I give you my word Morgana, I am truly sorry for what happened to you. And if the only way I can right this wrong and give you peace is to die? Then so be it my life is yours.” Merlin had spent so much time wishing he had the opportunity to speak to Morgana one last time that the words came naturally to him. 

He smiled up at her one last time, his eyes tracing the contours of her face before finally closing his eyes. He dropped his head forward, the movement making the dizziness in his head worse. He waited to be executed. He opened his eyes to look at her shadow. She lifted her sword and began to move towards him. He smiled and closed his eyes hoping against all hope that he was right and she would not go through with it. 

As he felt her come to a stop before him he thought about the off chance that he was wrong. He thought of Arthur and hoped that if he was wrong, that he would at least be seeing him soon. 

—— Earlier that day ——

Draco fell back as they appeared in Avalon, his eyes looking around everywhere he could as he tried to wrap his head around the fact that he was even here. 

“What the hell are we doing here Potter?!” He exclaimed as he looked back at the wizards and the strange woman. “And who is she?!”

“Draco meet Death, death Draco. Okay so any idea on how we get the sword out of the lake?” Harry asked like he was having a casual conversation about the weather. 

“D-d-d-death!?” Draco was looking between them like they had each grown six new heads before his eyes. 

“You will be collecting a lot more than a sword my lord… I think it is about time for the once and future king to rise again.” Death raised a brow, the smile on her face as secretive as that of the Mona Lisa’s. 

Harry froze his eyes darting between Death and the lake rapidly. “You mean…”

Death smiled softly. “This is a quest for the master of death my lord.” She raised her palm and within it sat the resurrection stone he had thought was lost. 

“I need to bring him back to life?!” Harry couldn’t help but to think this was a bit beyond his pay grade but with the way Death looked expectantly at him he doubted now was the time to start arguing about fate. 

“You’re the master of death?!” Draco shouted. “Wait what am I doing here? Am I going with him?” 

Death smiled and shook her head. She raised her other hand and a giant rope appeared in her hand. “No Draco you will be his life line. My lord you must take this stone and swim to the bottom of the lake. King Arthur slumbers between the veil of the living and the dead and you alone will be able to pass. You must find him and rouse him from his slumber. When you do, give him the stone and make sure he holds onto it until he is safely out of the lake. During your journey you must hold onto this rope, so long as you hold onto it you will find your way back. But if you let go even for a second you will be lost beyond the veil or worse in the fae realm.”

Harry swallowed before nodding and taking the stone in hand. “Don’t drop the rope. Got it. Anything else?” 

Draco was whipping his head back and forth between them still unable to comprehend that this was actually happening. 

Death handed the rope to Draco before pulling a small pouch on a necklace from her pocket. She opened it and waited expectantly. Harry nodded and dropped the stone in the pouch. “Put it around your neck my magic will allow you to breath under water so long as you’re touching the rope. Once you have the king here you can call for me. Now hurry we don’t have much time.” 

Harry looked back at Draco, the fear obvious in his stormy grey eyes. He walked over to wizard and kissed the blonde gently before he turned back to Death. “Let’s do this.”

With a wave of her hand a shimmering layer of magic covered Harry and the rope. “Remember that time is of the essence.”

Harry nodded he took his end of the rope and wrapped it around his wrist before tying it tight and gripping it his palm for good measure. He looked to see Draco clutching the other end tightly. 

“I’ll be back before you know it.” He said before turning back to the lake and running full force towards in before jumping in head first. 
 

Draco’s eyes welled up with tears as he clutched the rope in his hand. Death laid a gentle hand on his shoulder “This is his fate. All we can do is trust in him.” 

Draco nodded, his eyes trained on the surface of the lake. 

——

Harry couldn’t believe his eyes as he swam deeper and deeper into the lake. There was no animals within the body of water as far as he could see. Not a single fish or reptile, just the gentle sway of kelp. But there at the bottom of the lake was a castle. The same castle he remembered seeing in the painting Merlin showed him of Camelot. 

He made his way towards it, swimming as fast as his body would carry him, his hand still gripping the rope. He swam towards the castle and pushed his way to the door, forcing it to open just as his hand burned suddenly. He looked down to see that it was his ring! Merlin was hurt and he needed to hurry. 

He hurled the entirety of his body weight against the door until finally it relented. He forced his way into the door expecting it to flood with water but instead as he pushed into the hallway the lakes water seemed to stop outside the doors. 

“Do not worry the water will not enter this place.” Harry spun around in horror to see a young woman staring back at him adorned in a beautiful purple gown. As he looked closely at her it was obvious that she was an apparition. 

“W-who are you?!” He asked suddenly. 

“My name is Freya, I am the lady of the lake.” She explained kindly, a gentle smile on her face. 

“Ah… do all lakes have ladies or just this one?” He asked without thinking but the girl just laughed, the sound as delicate as wind chimes. 

“Have you come to wake him?” She asked gently. 

“I- we have to hurry Merlin is in danger.” Harry remembered, his eyes looking around as though Arthur would appear just around the corner.

Freya’s eyes widened, she nodded as she led the way through the halls of the castle. Harry looked around curiously, catching a glimpse of the armoury first, then the throne room and finally after they made their way up the stairs and down a hallway they reached their destination. 

Freya opened the door to the kings  bedchamber and there he was laying in his bed sound asleep. 

He looked just like he had in Merlin’s drawings, his armour and cape perfectly in place, his hands resting on his sternum holding Excalibur. 

“How do I wake him?” Harry asked Freya suddenly but she shook her head. 

“I do not know. I am but a spirit, I can only watch over him.” 

Harry stared at his ring, it was still burning from the injury Merlin sustained, meaning he hadn’t healed it… whatever was happening at Diagon Alley could not be good. 

He turned towards Arthur with fire in his eyes as he walked over to the king, grabbed him by his breast place and began shaking him.  “WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP DAMN IT WE NEED YOU TO GET UP! KING ARTHUR WAKE UP!” 

He was shaking him with the full force of his body much to the shocked horror on Freya’s face. Despite his effort the man continued to sleep peacefully. 

Harry gasped as his ring burned hot
again.  He stoped to stare at it and suddenly a terrifying idea dawned on Harry. What if he couldn’t do it? What if he failed Merlin? What would he do then?  

No. Fuck that, he would wake this man up no matter what it took. 

Harry looked back at him with determination before reaching for his shoulders this time. 

“DAMN IT WAKE UP WE NEED TO SAVE HIM. MERLIN IS GOING TO DIE IF YOU DON’T WAKE UP!” He screamed in his face over and over again as he continued to shake him. 

_____

Arthur was wrapped in the warm embrace of peace. He was here, he was safe and warm. He was happy. 

How could he not be when his dearly loved ones were there with him. 

And yet something felt wrong. 

No not wrong. All was right here. It was all right here. But it wasn’t. 

It couldn’t be. 

Something was missing. 

It felt like he was forgetting something. Something that was on the back of his mind always waiting for him, calling to him. 

Something that was him and not him all at once. 

He was missing something. 

He knew he was missing something. 

Like an itch he just could not scratch but was always there. 

But in the floating peace of the afterlife it was impossible to worry about such a thing. 

Arthur could feel something rousing him from his slumber. It felt so distant, so far away. He knew words were spoken and yet he could not force his mind to understand them. 

Then through the fog, clear as a bell he heard it.

Merlin. 

The name rang through his mind over and over and over again, his heart responded to it instinctively. 

Merlin. Merlin. Merlin. 

It was so familiar and yet he could not place it. 

Why did it bother him so? 

Why did it bother him when he had everything.

But he didn’t have everything. 

No, something was missing. 

Suddenly he heard the screaming of an unknown voice cutting through the fog of his slumber. “MERLIN NEEDS YOU DAMN IT NOW WAKE UP!” 

Merlin. Merlin was missing. 

Merlin was missing. 

Merlin was waiting for him. 

Merlin needed him. 

And so he opened his eyes. 

_____

“Is there a reason why you’re shaking me?” Arthur asks before even opening his eyes. Harry froze and then dropped him like a hot potato. 

“Holy shit it worked.” He couldn’t believe it. 

Arthur raised a brow, confused. He looked around his bed chamber, at a loss for how he had gotten here. Last he remembered he was in a forest far from the citadel. 

“Merlin?!” He looked towards the anti-chamber and shouted out as though waiting for him to suddenly pop up. 

“He’s in danger we need to hurry!” Harry shouted. 

Arthur rose from the bed immediately only to drop his sword on the ground in his haste. 

“I do not hear warning bells? Is he within the citadel?” He asked as he began to look around. “GUARDS?” He called as he picked up his sword but to his confusion no one answered.

Harry swore to himself, the man had no idea where he was. 

“My lord you are not in Camelot.” Freya began much to Harry’s relief. 

“Of course we are this is my bed chamber-“ he argued defensively. 

“Actually we’re at the bottom of a lake.” Harry interjected. 

Arthur looked at him like he’d grown another head. 

“That’s not possible! I mean are you mad or something?!” He demanded. 

Harry shrugged like he hadn’t just been insulted before replying sarcastically. “I wish.” 

Arthur was about to probe further when the boy walked to the curtains and pulled them back. The kings jaw dropped. Sure enough all that could be seen through the window was the depths of a lake. 

“Where the hell am I? Who are you people?! I demand you return me to Camelot this instant!” Arthur exclaimed looking back and forth between the man and the woman. 

Harry sighed knowing that they did not have time for this. 

“First of all I’m Harry Potter and I’m here to wake you up. Now listen, I’m probably not the right person to tell you this but Camelot is gone-“

“What the hell do you mean by that?! I know I heard you say Merlin’s name now where is he?!” Arthur demanded, suddenly terrified that something had happen to him. 

“In danger, Morgana is trying to kill him-“ Harry explained much to Arthur’s horror. 

“That’s not possible I watched her die!” Arthur shouted, this had to be a trick of some sort. 

“Yeah well you were dead too and now here we are! Listen it’s been 1500 years since you’ve died-“

“1500?! Hundreds no thousands of years? No that can’t be. But you said Merlin and Morgana it doesn’t-“ Arthur was getting more confused by the moment. 

Harry dragged a hand through his hair his ring still warm to the touch. 

“It’s the truth. You died, Merlin put you to rest at the bottom of lake Avalon and he’s been waiting for you to return for the last millennia. Camelot fell over a thousand years ago and no longer exists. Morgana was also dead but some dark wizards summoned her from the grave. She and Merlin are now fighting and if we don’t stop them she’ll kill- AHHH” Harry screamed as he clutched the ring on his hand the burning catching him off guard. 

“Are you alright?!” Freya asked as he waved his hand to lessen the sting. 

“Ring tells me when Merlin’s injured- AHHH“ Harry screamed looking down at the ring. “DAMN IT MERLIN WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?”

Arthur looked on in horror, unable to comprehend that this was really happening but seeing Harry shouting at the ring worried him. If Morgana was truly attacking Merlin she wouldn’t stop until he is dead, he was sure of it. 

Harry looked back at the king with a fire in his eyes “We need to hurry so either you come help me or I’m taking your sword and killing Morgana myself!” He threatened before marching out the room. He didn’t even look back to see if Arthur was following but the sound of his heavy footsteps said enough. 

They reached the front gate before long and Arthur gasped seeing the lake stopped just outside the door. 

Harry pulled the pouch holding the stone off his neck and handed it to Arthur. “Do not take that off or lose it under any circumstances.” Arthur nodded putting it on and trapping it beneath his chest plate. As he looked up Harry was handing him the rope. 

“Hold onto the rope and no matter what you do don’t let go till we’re out of the lake. You let go you’ll probably die again. Got it?” 

Arthur nodded taking the rope and winding it around his wrist. 

“I wish you luck on your journey.” Freya offered. Harry nodded thanking her for her help before jumping into the water. 

They swam up to the surface as fast as physically possible, the rope helping to pull them to the surface. Just as they reached the top Harry’s hand burned once again, the pain was so sudden that he lost control of his hand, dropping the rope. 

Arthur breached the surface and suddenly began looking around, he saw a man on the shore waving him over but no Harry. He looked down just in time to see him sinking into the lake his hand outstretched and reaching for him.  

Arthur swore as he grabbed the rope placing it within his teeth before diving after the boy. 

The moment he caught his hand he took the rope from his mouth to tug it and the man at the other end helped to pull them from the lake. 

Between the armour and the weight of the water it took a moment to drag Harry onto the shores of the lake, but by then the boy had inhaled water and didn’t seem to be breathing. 

Arthur turned the boy over ready to try and pull the water from his lungs when the blonde man pushed him out of the way screaming words he realized he did not understand. 

He sat back and watched him pull what seemed to be a stick from his unusual cloathing and point it at the boy. Arthur recoiled with shock at the use of magic but to Arthur’s relief the boy started to move and spit up the water he ingested. The boy waved the stick again and suddenly they were all dry of water. 

Arthur watched on as Harry got his bearings, he was speaking but somehow Arthur was now unable to understand what he was saying. Arthur was about to speak to try and ask them if they could understand him when much to his surprise the blond boy pulled Harry into a kiss. 

Arthur’s eyes grew wide as saucers as he looked back and forth between the men, considered whether he’d somehow misgendered them. He waited a moment for them to split apart but by the look of it that wasn’t happening any time soon. Eventually he felt the need to cough and interrupt them as they seemed consumed in their passions. 

They looked back at him in horror as he spoke. They then looked at him and each-other in confusion before Harry grabbed hold of what seemed to be a necklace. 

Suddenly another woman appeared, Arthur jumped back, surprised that she seemingly appeared from nowhere. 

“It is good to see you again your majesty.” She said to him with a bow in words he actually understood. 

“Have we met before? I apologize if I do not recognize you.” Arthur asked wearily. 

The woman smiled and upon looking at her it was obvious she was not a normal woman. “I am Death my king. I am here to help you save Emrys. We do not have much time-“

“Take me to him! We need to hurry, is Morgana truly alive?” He asked suddenly but Death nodded. 

“She has returned, and now poses a great risk to Albion and the world at large. You must stop her from killing Emrys and continuing on the path of darkness.” She explained as Arthur agreed knowing he’d do whatever it took without hesitation. 

“I can’t seem to understand anyone-“ Arthur began but Death held out her hand and he felt the shiver of magic pass over him.  “What did you-“

“Consider it a gift. With this magic you will be able to speak and understand all human languages. Use it well.” She explained before holding out her arms. “Take my arm we don’t have much time so you will need to hurry.” 

All three men did so without hesitation. 

Chapter Text

They re-appeared in the same alley they had left from and as Harry heard the shouting from the fight he ran out into the streets with Arthur and Draco following close behind. 

Harry and Arthur froze in shock at the back of the crowd when they heard Merlin shout for everyone to hear.

“MORGANA IF MY LIFE IS WHAT YOU WANT THEN YOU CAN HAVE IT.”

“THE HELL SHE CAN!” Arthur shouted as he ran head first into the crowd, his sword drawn as he tried to push through towards the platform. 

“MOVE DAMN IT!” Harry yelled as he tried to force his way through the chaos without much luck. 

Finally he raised his hand, screaming for everyone to get out of the way as his eyes shone gold and the force of his magic wedged between the panicking witches and wizards and made a path through the crowd. 

Arthur didn’t waste a second as he ran through the crowd, his eyes not straying from Merlin the moment he became visible. He watched in horror as Merlin put his hands behind his back in surrender. He could see he was speaking but the words were unclear until he drew closer.  

“-But I give you my word Morgana I am truly sorry for what happened to you. And if the only way I can right this wrong and give you peace is to die? Then so be it my life is yours.”   

Arthur forced himself to go as fast as possible. From his left he saw two men try to intercept him but before he could cut them down Harry and Draco ran out in front of him to battle them with magic. 

Arthur didn’t stop running as he hoped the others would handle them while he made his way to Morgana. 

Neither she nor Merlin were paying any attention to the crowd, their focus solely on each other as Morgana picked up her sword and walked towards Merlin. 

“If you wish to die Emrys who am I to deny you.” Morgan stated, her eyes frozen on the man kneeling at her feet. 

She had dreamed of bringing him to his knees before her so many times and yet now that she had him where she wanted him her victory felt hollow. Nevertheless, she would not deny the opportunity the goddess had granted her. She thought of Mordred and Morgause and all the pain she had suffered throughout her life. 

She lifted her sword and willed herself to drop it with the full force of her strength, tears welling up in her eyes as she thought of the boy she had once known Merlin to be. 

She closed her eyes as she let the sword fall but the clang of steel against steel forced her to recoil. Her eyes widened in shock as she froze, there before her very eyes was Arthur Pendragon himself. 

“Arthur?” She said without conscious thought but he just pushed her forward, his sword against hers forcing her back. 

“I will not let you kill him Morgana.” 

The statement caused rage to flood her, how dare he intervene. How dare he live when he had taken everything from her. 

“You won’t be able to stop me Arthur.” She seethed. 

He practically growled as he raised his sword and charged towards her. 

——

Merlin fell back on his ass, his vision blurry, his mind dazed unable to understand what had happen as he heard the sound of clashing steel. 

He looked up to see the back of a man he had only dreamed of for centuries. A man he would recognize anywhere. 

“Arthur.” He whispered the name and then watched in horror as he ran forward to battle Morgana. 

Just as he tried to push himself to his feet with every intention of jumping between them Harry’s magic pulled him off of the platform. 

He didn’t have a second to think, his mind sluggish and struggling to keep up with all that was happening. Harry pulled him into his arms suddenly but he cried out in pain at the pressure. 

“Sorry sorry shit I’m so fucking glad you’re okay!” Harry was shouting a mile a minute before grabbing him by his shoulders “What the hell were you thinking! You promised me-“ Merlin covered his lips before he could continue his eyes flickering back and forth between the sword fight and Harry. 

“She wasn’t going to do it!” He whispered. 

“Are you delirious, she tried to chop your fucking head off!” Harry argued, ready to slap the stupidity out of Merlin but the boy froze as he heard Arthur shout. 

“Cease this madness Morgana, I do not wish to watch you die again!” Arthur shouted only to have Morgana charge at him again. He fought her tooth and nail, she had always been fast on her feet and she knew how to out-maneuver him but he was stronger and his conditioning was as seamless as ever. 

“NOT UNTIL I HAVE MY REVENGE!” She screamed as she attacked him ruthlessly, her rage fuelling her actions and making her blind to strategy. 

“BUT AT WHAT COST SISTER?” Arthur begged and their swords clashed again. “Look around!” 

CLASH  

“Everything we have ever known is gone!” He shouted has he charged at her once again. 

CLASH

“Camelot is gone!” 

CLASH 

“Our people are long dead and gone!” 

CLASH 

“All that’s left of our father has probably long since turned to dust!” He shouted but that only made her angrier. 

“You do not know all that he has done!” She screamed and she attacked him again and again and again, frustrated that he was blocking each and every blow. 

“So you plan to kill him?! Will that make everything right in the world?! Will that change a damn thing after all this time?! Why won’t you accept that there is another way?!” Arthur fought unwilling to compromise and unable to understand why Morgana couldn’t see reason. 

“Do not think for a second that I will trust you again, not even for a moment Arthur-“ Morgana began only to freeze as Arthur laughed. 

“TRUST ME? When have you ever trusted me Morgana?! When have you ever just trusted me enough to let me help you?!” Arthur shouted, the pain in his voice clear for all to see. 

“You would have me and my people destroyed!” She yelled back as she rose her sword to bring it down on him again. 

“You don’t know that at all!” Arthur shouted as his sword met hers. 

The resulting duel was vicious, Arthur fought with every fibre of his being, unwilling to let Morgana get an edge on him for even a second. 

He could hear Merlin shouting for them to stop this and put down their swords. His cries growing more and more desperate as time went on but they wouldn’t look at him. Not at the cost of giving the other an opening. 

Arthur and Morgana were both panting as they pulled back momentarily. 

“Morgana for once in your life think about what it is that you are doing! There is nothing to be gained from this and everything to be lost!” Arthur pleaded as he tried to get through to the Morgana he had once known and loved. 

“I HAVE ALREADY LOST EVERYTHING BECAUSE OF HIM! I WILL NOT REST UNTIL HE IS DEAD!” She screamed as she once again raised her sword but froze at the sound of Merlin’s voice. 

“THEN TAKE ME DAMN IT! PLEASE MORGANA THIS IS BETWEEN US NOT ARTHUR!” He shouted as loud as his voice could carry. 

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Harry shouted before turning to the crazed witch that was now watching them. “HE DOESN’T MEAN THAT!” He shouted back. 

“YES I DO!” Merlin shouted before trying the climb back up onto the platform but Ron and Harry grabbed him before he could. 

Morgana raised her sword and made to walk towards Merlin but Arthur put his sword to her neck before she could take a single step. 

Arthur seethed with rage the moment Morgana’s eyes fell on Merlin. 

“You heard him Arthur he wishes to die. It’s best I put him out of his misery.” Morgana said before turning to stare pointedly at Arthur. 

The knight flipped his sword in hand and pointed the tip of the blade at Morgana’s jugular as he moved to stand between the witch and Merlin. “His life is not his to bargain with Morgana and you know it.” 

“Fine, I’ll kill you first.”

Merlin screamed as loud as his voice allowed as he begged and pleaded for them to stop. He thrashed violently against Ron and Harry, pleading with them to let him go but they wouldn’t budge. 

Harry turned to Ron, a look of determination smouldering in their eyes. They would not let Merlin walk to his doom. Not today. 

Arthur sighed. “So be it Morgana. You have already succeeded in killing me once through deceit and betrayal. At least this time I hope you will adhere to the knights code on which we both were raised.” 

Arthur’s sword did not move but he raised his other hand to his mouth and pulled his gauntlet in hand. 

“NO! SIRE PLEASE I BEG OF YOU! PLEASE DON’T THROW IT! PLEASE!” Merlin begged and screamed, his eyes filling with tears as pure terror coursed through him. 

He couldn’t watch him die, he couldn’t watch him die. Not again. Please not again. 

Arthur did not flinch at the sound of his cries though the pain in his eyes was clear for Morgana to see. 

“You have a choice to make Morgana. If you lift this gauntlet we will duel to the death by the knights law. No magic, no tricks. Or you agree to cease with this madness.” Arthur warned. 

“You’re the one who is mad if you think I will trust you to let me live-“ Morgana argued but Arthur paid it no mind. 

“Your desperation for vengeance has already robbed us both of our lives once sister. Do not make the same mistake again and for once in your life trust me. Swear your fealty to me and I will protect you-“ Arthur pleaded.  

“I DO NOT NEED YOUR PROTECTION, I NEED YOUR LIFE!” She seethed. 

“PLEASE MORGANA IF ITS ME YOU WANT JUST TAKE ME! BUT PLEASE DON’T DO THIS!” Merlin begged and pleaded but to no avail. 

Arthur threw the gauntlet at Morgana’s feet but her eyes were fixed on Merlin.

“You have your choice Morgana. Either pick up the gauntlet or I’ll run you through here and now.” Arthur’s voice didn’t waiver once as he watched his sister mull over her options. 

“If you wish to delay the inevitable Arthur who am I to stop you.” She said as she bent down to pick up the gauntlet. 

Merlin’s cries could be heard through out Diagon Alley as he begged them not to do this. 

“We shall meet here four candle marks past high noon.” Arthur stated. 

Morgana nodded and with the flourish of her magic she was gone in a flash of smoke. 

Arthur waited a moment, staring at the place she had just inhabited before finally sheathing his sword now that the danger had passed momentarily. 

Merlin forced his way past Harry and Ron the second their grip relaxed so he could climb up the platform to run to Arthur. His injuries be damned. 

“What the bloody hell was that!?” Merlin shouted the second he met Arthur’s eyes.  “Why would you throw her the gauntlet!? Why would you be so stupid! Don’t you understand that she’s going to try and kill you?!” He slammed his palm against Arthur’s chest as the adrenaline coursed through his veins. 

“Merlin-“ Arthur’s eyes were wide as he watched the sorcerer shout at him like a man possessed. 

“You can’t do this Arthur! You can’t! She’s going to kill you damn it!” The sorcerer continued to shout uncaring of the fact that the remaining Aurors, witches and wizards were all watching with rapt attention. 

“Merlin-“

“I told you not to do it! I begged and I begged and you never listen! You can’t fight her-“

“She’s already picked up the gauntlet-“ Arthur rationalized, his eyes watching Merlin closely, unperturbed by his demands. Instead he couldn’t help but catalogue the man’s appearance. His clothing, his hair and then his visible injuries. He thanked every god and goddess in existence that he arrived in the nick of time. 

“WHO CARES ABOUT THE BLOODY GAUNTLET! PLEASE SIRE DON’T DO THIS!” He begged, the fear in his eyes freezing Arthur where he stood. He’d always known Merlin to worry but never like this. 

“Merlin listen to me-“ he began but Merlin suddenly crumbled to his knees before him, his head bowed as though he didn’t have an ounce of energy left. “MERLIN! What the hell are you doing?! Get up!” He shouted but the boy shook his head viciously as he mumbled something under his breath. 

“Oh for the love of-“ Arthur looked at the people swarming all around in the aftermath of the chaos, many still watching them. He knelt down quickly to try and better hear Merlin but his words were like a knife to the chest. 

“Not again- can’t watch him die again. Not again. Not again. I’ll be alone again. Not again.” He was crying softly to himself as the panic finally hit him like a wrecking ball, uncaring of the tears cascading down his face as he wept. 

Arthur had sustained all sorts of injuries throughout his life but those words cut deeper than any blade. As he looked at their surroundings the weight of a thousand years fell over him and he was forced to face his new reality. 

Merlin had been alone… here…. for longer than he could even comprehend. 

He reached out to the boy, his hand falling on the back of Merlin’s neck. “Merlin?” 

His head rose at the call of his name, his eyes shining with tears. Arthur gazed gently down at him. “I know I have no right to ask anything of you after all this time. But I would have hoped you hadn’t lost faith in me-“

“Never. Not even for a moment.” The answer came without pause as Merlin’s hand reached for his forearm. “You will always be my lord and my King Arthur.” 

Merlin looked back at him with so much admiration and loyalty that it made Arthur feel unbalanced. He never considered himself worthy of the loyalty Merlin had shown to him but as those bright blue eyes looked back at him Arthur felt invincible. With Merlin by his side he felt like there wasn’t an enemy he couldn’t vanquish. He fell to his knees before the boy, his hand still heavy against his neck. 

“Then trust me with this. I will take care of everything.” He vowed as much to himself as he was Merlin. 

“I can’t watch you die Arthur-“ Merlin begged as his eyes filled with fresh tears and Arthur pulled the poor boy to his chest to let him cry against him. 

Arthur wrapped his arms around the sorcerer as he recalled his final moments in life. He had so desperately wished that day that he was strong enough then to embrace Merlin one last time. It was his only regret as he had died in Merlin’s arms. 

He swore he would not let him go again. 

Merlin continued to sob, unable to truly control himself as he held onto Arthur for the first time in centuries.

Arthur pulled him even closer as his body shook under the weight of his cries. Arthur moved to tuck his head against his shoulder, his hand gliding up his nape and to his head so he could keep him close. 

Arthur pulled back his hand suddenly, it was covered in blood.  

“MERLIN YOUR HEAD IS BLEEDING!” Arthur shouted as he pulled the boy away from him. On closer inspection the sorcerer was also struggling to breathe. 

“It’s fine-“ Merlin protested as he wiped away the tears. 

“The hell it is!” Arthur shouted before promptly grabbing Merlin by the arm and hoisting him to his feet. 

“He’s injured we need a physician!” Arthur yelled to Harry who was standing at the edge of the platform. A woman next to him waved them over as Harry ran off in the opposite direction, chasing one of the men who Arthur recalled had attacked them earlier. 

“Bring him here! Hurry!” She shouted as she too waved a stick and suddenly a tent appeared before her. 

Arthur didn’t hesitate to walk Merlin off the platform but they had to move slowly. Merlin was struggling to walk, the dizziness getting to him all of a sudden.  

Arthur caught him just before he accidentally slipped off the platform before lifting him up in his arms and jumping off the trees roots. He herded Merlin into the tent and onto a cot that was already within before he could lose his balance again. 

“You’re a witch-“ Arthur noted casually as he stared at the woman who was closely followed by the blonde he’d met earlier. 

The woman walked up to him and raised her hand. “I’m Hermione Granger. That’s Draco Malfoy.” He glanced at Merlin who was clearly un-phased by her presence before he shook her hand without second thought. If Merlin trusted them so could he. 

“I’m Arthur Pendragon. Can you help him he’s in need of a physician-“ Arthur asked when Merlin suddenly sat up on the bed. Before Hermione could reprimand him Arthur reached over and pushed him back
down onto the bed. 

“Yeah well lucky for you we’re the best you can get.” Draco drawled as he walked over to Merlin with his wand lifted. 

Merlin made to protest but Arthur beat him to it.

“What is that and what do you plan to do with it?” Arthur asked suddenly concerned for Merlin’s wellbeing.  

Draco rolled his eyes but before he could retort Hermione interjected. 

“It’s a wand. We use it to magnify our magic which we’ll need in order to heal him.” Hermione explained but Merlin once again sat up to protest. 

Arthur didn’t even look at him as he pushed him back down on the bed much to Draco’s amusement. He shot Merlin a raised eyebrow but Merlin said nothing to the blonde as he blushed with embarrassment. 

“We need to do a diagnostic spell first to find out what’s wrong with him and then we can start healing the injuries.” Draco added.

“But you’ll be able to heal him?” He confirmed as he looked between the physicians.  

“Not completely, it’ll take time for his injuries to heal and with his magic gone-“ Hermione added. 

“What happen to his magic?!” Arthur demanded. 

“Morgana ripped most of it from me with a spell.” Merlin interjected before Hermione could answer. 

“You mean you let her.” Hermione remarked pointedly, her own anger obvious on her face as she glared at her friend. 

“You did WHAT?” If looks could kill Arthur’s anger would probably have made Merlin’s head explode. 

To his credit Merlin hadn’t thought that he’d have to justify his actions to Arthur of all people when he had decided to try and play chicken with Morgana. 

“I thought it was a good idea!” He argued immediately, unable to help himself despite the fact that his ears were now ringing. Clearly shouting was not a good idea. 

“Yes well you’re an idiot!” Arthur shot back before turning to the shocked and amused faces of the physicians. “Is there a way to restore his magic?” 

Merlin sat up to interject but Arthur pushed him down onto the bed again before he got the chance. 

Hermione looked back and forth between them before answering. “There’s a potion but it won’t do much. He’s lost so much it’ll take time for him to restore it. That also means his injuries will take longer to heal.” Hermione explained. 

Arthur nodded. “Please do what ever you can to help him.” 

“You don’t have to ask, he’s our friend.” Draco huffed as he held up his wand ready to start trying to heal him. 

“I still owe you a great deal for your assistance. If there is anything I can do to-“

Merlin sat up once again to interrupt him and Arthur had finally had enough. 

“Oh for the love of- What!? What is it Merlin?! What is so important that you feel the need to interrupt me every 12 seconds when I am trying to speak to your physicians!?” He erupted as he spun on his heel to focus on the sorcerer, his arms crossed as he waited for an explanation, his expression thunderous. 

Merlin froze under Arthur’s gaze, even after all this time he couldn’t help but freeze when pinned down by those eyes. “We don’t have time for this! Morgana will be here before long and we need a plan-“

Arthur looked up to the heavens praying for patience before he did something insane like ringing Merlin’s neck himself out of sheer annoyance and frustration. 

“Plan? You want a plan?” Arthur asked calmly as he waited to see Merlin nod cautiously. “Okay how’s this for a bloody plan either you let these physicians stop your head from bleeding or I don’t care how little time we have, I will carve out some time to re-teach you manners!” He practically growled his last words as his frustrations finally boiled over. It was bad enough that he’d let himself get so badly injured but now this?

“Yes sire.” Merlin replied obediently for once in his life. He swallowed as he looked up at the hard set of Arthur’s jaw and the sheer rage in his eyes. He had always hated making Arthur angry. Annoying him was one thing but angering him was another and a long slumbering part of him remembered just how terribly he hated it when Arthur was upset with him. 

Hermione and Draco exchanged a look unsure of how to proceed when the tent burst open with a ruffled looking Harry running in. 

“Please tell me that he’s okay-“ he practically demanded as he waltzed over to the bed and stopped. “Why aren’t you healing him?”

“Merlin-“ Hermione began to explain but Harry’s head exploded before he could stop to think. 

“Oh for fucks sake seriously Em!? First you nearly get yourself killed and now you don’t want treatment?!” He demanded when Merlin put up his hands in surrender. Harry didn’t even let him get a word in before he barrelled along. “Oh don’t give me that shit I brought King Arthur back from the fucking dead to save your ass and you’re fighting us on this shit again?!” 

“Harry I wasn’t and I’m fine-“ Merlin began when Ron shouted for Harry from outside the tent. “What’s going on out there-“ just for Ron to call for him again. 

Harry looked back and forth between Ron’s voice and Merlin. 

“God damn it! Fuck! I swear if you’re not getting healed by the time I get back I’m killing you myself!” He shouted as he stormed out of the tent in a flurry. 

Arthur couldn’t help but to chuckle at the shocked expression on Merlin’s face. The look of betrayal he shot him in response only serving to amuse him more. 

Draco and Hermione jumped into action immediately, running one spell after another as they worked to catalogue all his injuries before they made a game plan to heal him. 

A enchanted pen and parchment scribbled each of their findings much to Arthur’s utter fascination as he tracked its movements with his eyes. 

Arthur stood back as he watched the physicians work, half heartedly listening to their conversation as he took stock of their surroundings. Arthur watched the way Hermione spoke about the injuries and the enchantments she could recall Morgana casting, the way that Draco used magic so expertly. Even earlier during the battle he’d seen everyone using a myriad of different types of magic without a second thought. 

It was obvious that they were free to use magic freely and yet this society was clearly thriving. He thought back to his father’s lectures about magic’s corrupting influence momentarily but then there was Merlin. He was watching him the way he always was. When he noticed Arthur’s gaze turn to him he smiled up at him and Arthur couldn’t help but think his father was a damn fool for believing such drivel. 

Draco cleared his throat, pulling their attention away from one another. The blonde smirked as his eyes met Merlin’s and the sorcerer couldn’t help but blush at being caught staring. 

“The good news is you’re somehow still conscious. As it stands you’ve got two brain bleeds on top of swelling in your frontal lobe. You’ve also got a collapsed lung, 4 broken ribs, the cut on your arm has torn through the muscle and your magical reserves are dangerously low on top of all the soft tissue injuries from Madame Crazy throwing you around like a ragdoll.” Draco listed out before glaring at the sorcerer pointedly. “Do you want to explain to me how this happens? I mean it’s bad enough that you’ve been hiding the fact that you’re Merlin himself but I’d have expected you’d have the common sense by now to not let yourself be treated like a ruddy punching bag!” 

Hermione watched Merlin closely as he flinched at Draco’s lecture but all things considered it was well deserved. He turned to her, planning to answer their searching looks when the look of rage on Arthur’s face distracted him. 

“Arthur?” He probed gently. 

Arthur was doing everything in his power to not hunt Morgana down and run her through with his sword. “I’ll kill her.” 

“You can’t-“ Merlin protested. 

“Really? Cause the sword on my waist says otherwise Merlin. To think that she’d do this to you-“ Arthur was shaking his head still unable to comprehend why she would hurt  Merlin like this. 

“Arthur she wasn’t going to kill me!” Merlin argued. “She hesitated, she had the opening multiple times and yet she didn’t kill me!” 

Arthur stared intently at Merlin for a moment before resting his fingers on his chin, his mind thinking back to what he’d seen.

If she was lost to her own madness then he didn’t doubt that Merlin would have killed her. How could he when he remembered her death all too clearly. 

He also knew he could trust Merlin’s judgment especially when he seemed as sure of something as he currently did. 

He thought back to the fight and he was sure when he intercepted her sword that there were tears in her eyes. They had even been closed as she cast her sword down. Now that he thought about it her sword was easy to deflect and he knew that meant the force she’d used wasn’t strong enough to actually sever Merlin’s head from his body. 

“You gave her multiple openings?!” Draco demanded and Merlin at-least had the decency to look ashamed. 

“He also let her throw a ball of fire at his chest which is probably what caused the collapsed lung and rib fractures.” Hermione noted as she reviewed the list of injuries. She looked up to see Arthur looking pointedly at Merlin waiting for an explanation. 

“She looked worried about me when it hit me?” He offered halfheartedly as Arthur pinched the bridged of his nose. 

“You were always mentally deficient Merlin but this is ridiculous even for you.” Arthur complained as he waited expectantly. 

Merlin felt properly chastised with Arthur’s probing gaze watching him far too closely. He had forgotten how powerful that gaze had been, how he always felt vulnerable and laid bare before him in a way that was difficult to explain. It was worse when he looked as disappointed as he currently did. 

“Sorry.” He mumbled finally. Arthur sighed and shook his head before seeing a chair in the back of the tent. He grabbed it and took a seat and leaned back to watch the physicians work.

Draco and Hermione weren’t wasting even a moment, there wasn’t a second where they weren’t casting spell after spell to try and jump start the healing process for each of the injuries. 

Merlin tried not to react as they fixed and set some of the more painful cuts and bones. He gasped as he felt Draco working on his head injuries, the spells making him feel dizzy and light headed. He thought closing his eyes might help but every time he did a part of him would panic that Arthur wasn’t truly there. That he was gone again. 

He’d tried to keep them open after that but it was easier said than done. 

“Em’ we need to re-inflate your lung and heal the damage but this will hurt.” Hermione noted clinically as Draco walked over to Merlin with a mouth guard. 

“Bite down on this and do you need us the tie you down or can you-“

“I’ll hold him.” Arthur offered immediately as he walked up towards Merlin’s head. 

Merlin looked between Hermione and Draco unsure of what to do but Arthur, never being a patient man when it came to Merlin, took the mouthguard from Draco’s hand and held it to Merlin. He waited expectantly for a moment until Merlin took the guard and put it in his mouth obediently. 

Draco and Hermione shared a look and did a terrible job of hiding their obvious amusement and curiosity. After all Merlin was well known for being headstrong and stubborn at the best of times. 

Arthur lay his arm across Merlin’s shoulders, just above his torso and then waited. 

Hermione and Draco began to preform the spells, trying their best to maintain their steady spell work despite Merlin screaming an writhing underneath them. 

Arthur’s other hand moved to the top of Merlin head as he tried to keep his focus from the pain. “Merlin just breath, we’ve got you.” 

Merlin nodded, his eyes gazing up at Arthur as he waited for the pain to dissipate.

Finally, they all breathed a sigh of relief once the job was done. Merlin was panting and sweating as he removed the mouthguard and tried to breathe through the pain. 

Hermione enchanted a cloth to remove the sweat from Merlin’s face but Arthur caught it mid flight to ring it out before gently smoothing it over the sorcerers brow himself. 

Draco and Hermione shared another look and pretended not to watch as Arthur gently wiped Merlin’s forehead, then his cheeks to gently clear away the tears before dragging it down his neck to remove the sweat there. 

“Alright there Merlin?” He asked softly, noticing that Merlin was still watching his face. 

“I still can’t believe you’re really here.” The words came from his lips before he could stop them. 

Arthur smiled. “And here I thought you’d have enjoyed being rid of me.” The pain that flashed across Merlin’s face gave him pause. “Lucky for you I’m not going anywhere.” 

The relief on the sorcerer face was obvious and not for the first time today Arthur couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. 

He moved back as Hermione shooed him out of her space so she could keep working. So instead, he sat back and watched as they kept working until finally Hermione crossed her arms, pleased with her work. 

“Alright Merlin you’re all patched up, I’ve sent for your potions which should help you feel a bit better but you need to be careful. No heavy physical activities, no running around, no working and absolutely no magic until your levels have evened out.” Hermione was pinning him with the look she often used to discipline her children.

“Basically try not to be your usually idiotic self for at least the next month.” Draco piped in as he began to clear away all the mess and spare tools. 

“Now what’s the plan?” Hermione asked expectantly as she looked between the two men. “You do have one don’t you?”

Arthur raised a brow before glancing at Merlin. 

“I’d like to know the answer to that as well. My lord?” Merlin asked cheekily and Arthur’s eyes narrowed as he watched Merlin. 

“You do realize you’re not speaking and just staring at each other don’t you?” Draco asked with genuine perplexity. 

“Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.” Hermione joked under her breath garnering a glare from Draco and a laugh from Merlin. 

Hermione smiled as she walked over to the sorcerer and pulled him in for a long hug. “Don’t worry me like that again.” She whispered as he pulled her in and hugged her tight. 

“I really didn’t think she was going to kill me Hermione, I mean you saw her-“ Merlin began, knowing exactly what thoughts were spiralling in the witches head. She was never this quiet unless she was thinking about something. 

She sighed and sat down across from Merlin on the bed. “I know Em’ and I understand why, I mean- I saw her hesitate too-“ 

“I knew you would! I just wanted to take the chance. I didn’t want to regret this.” Merlin explained. 

Hermione sighed, she couldn’t blame him for his reasoning. “I just don’t like the idea of  you getting hurt in the balance, you know that.”

Merlin nodded, he couldn’t help but feel guilty having put them through this all over again but what choice did he have? It was the only way to get through to Morgana and that wasn’t a chance he could pass up. 

The tent opened again as Ron hurried inside. “How’s everyone holding up in here?” He asked as he made his way in, his appearance disheveled after the days events. 

“I’m alive!” Merlin joked with both thumbs up. 

“Not funny!” Ron retorted as he made a beeline for the king. “Hello I’m Ron Weasley, and it is an honour to meet you sir.” He greeted as he vigorously shook his hand. Hermione covered her eyes unable to watch her husband fangirl over the king. 

Draco couldn’t help but goad her on. “Hey you’re the one who married him.” But Hermione just smacked him as Merlin tried to hide his laughter. 

Arthur on the other hand seemed quite enthused to meet Ron and happily shook his hand. 

“Arthur Pendragon, it’s nice to meet you too. Thank you for your help today, to all of you I owe my deepest gratitude.” Arthur said with his warmest smile. 

Merlin sat back and watched as he charmed his friends without batting an eye. Evidently the sorcerer had also forgotten just how charismatic his king could be.  

“Ahh it’s no problem really, Merlin’s one of our own after all.” Ron actually blushed before walking over to Merlin to pull him into a hug. “Holding up alright?” 

“As best as I can, I feel like I’ve been hit in the head with a bludger.” Merlin complained as Ron took a seat next to him on the bed. 

“Well you play stupid games and you’ll win stupid prizes mate.” Ron joked before eyeing Merlin. “And I thought we agreed no more blood?”

Merlin looked properly chastised then, he couldn’t help it, he hated disappointing his friends. “This was different, I don’t think she was actually going to kill me.”

“Yeah Harry mentioned that, George’s head nearly exploded when he heard-“ Ron said with a sigh. 

“George is mad at me too?! Ugh I’m screwed.” Merlin said with a sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Who is this George person?” Arthur asked, curious as to why Merlin would worry about upsetting him. He hadn’t even seen him worry like this when Uther would get upset with him. 

“He’s Ron’s older brother. He looks a lot like Ron except taller and somehow even more protective.” Merlin joked as Ron rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah and he’s mental that one, lucky for you he got sent home with the rest of the civilians and I sent Harry to cool off and go pick up your potions.” Ron added and the way Merlin’s eyes lit up made the redhead  smile. 

“Oh my god I love you, I do not have it in me to face them both head on just yet.” Merlin admitted with a soft smile. Ron smiled back at him glad that he was finally acting like himself again. 

“You can’t blame them for being upset, but you’ll have to face them eventually though I’d be more concerned about Molly.” Hermione interjected as Merlin groaned and Ron snickered. 

“Yup mums going to want your head on a platter tomorrow.” Ron joked as Merlin groaned again. There was no way George wouldn’t fill his parents in on what had happen. 

The tent opened once again and this time Harry waltzed in with the potions in hand. 

“Alright I don’t want to hear a peep about the potions, so drink up!” He demanded the second he walked up to the cot. 

Draco rolled his eyes before taking the bag containing the potions to take a look. “Let’s make sure you didn’t get the wrong ones first Potter.” 

Harry rolled his eyes before walking over to Merlin. 

The sorcerer smiled while raising his hand as far up as he could but was still unable to reach his cheek. Harry sat down on the bed and took his hand to rest it on his cheek himself. 

“I’m going to be okay Harry I promise.” Merlin said before the wizard could get a word in. 

“I thought I was going to lose you.” Harry replied, as he finally let the tension drop from his body. Merlin smiled back at him and shook his head. 

“You didn’t because you saved me.” Merlin reminded gently. “And I’m so proud of you, you know that? You’re always saving me right in the nick of time.” 

Harry’s eyes watered as he pulled Merlin into a hug. “It’s hard to be mad at you when you say shit like that.” 

“That was the point.” Merlin joked, as he ran a gentle hand through Harry’s hair and thanked the gods that the boy was safe.  Harry chuckled as he pulled back before turning his gaze to Arthur who’d been quietly observing everything that was going on.

“So your majesty how’s … coming back to life?” Harry asked only for Draco to smack him upside the head. “Oi what was that for.” 

“Move your crowding my patient.” The blonde ordered, ignoring the outburst entirely but Harry grumbled and stood up all the same and walked over to Arthur. 

“So what’s the plan for your sister? My offer still stands, I’m more than happy to run her through with the sword.” Harry offered. Merlin nearly choked on his potion. 

“Harry you can’t kill her, we’ll take care of Morgana.” The sorcerer interjected before drowning his first potion. 

“There is no we here Merlin, you’ve done your part I’ll take care of the rest.” Arthur assured as his eyes met Merlin’s. 

“You don’t actually believe this whole she wasn’t trying to kill him business do you?” Ron asked, watching Arthur critically. 

“I mean she tried to chop off his head, that usually leads to death.” Draco added as he prompted Merlin to take his second potion. 

“The force of her swing wasn’t actually strong enough to decapitate him.” Arthur offered much to the obvious shock, horror and confusion of everyone in the room. Arthur stopped as he looked at everyones faces before turning to Merlin. “Was it something I said?”

“Most people these days don’t have a lot of experience chopping off people’s heads.” Merlin offered without batting an eye as he grimaced from the taste of the potion. 

“Ahhh well Morgana does, I mean if she had wanted to chop your head off it wouldn’t have been hard for her. She also had her eyes closed and I’m sure I saw a tear in her eye when I intercepted her blade.” Arthur remembered it all so clearly and he couldn’t shake the feeling he’d seen regret on her face. 

“I was right!” Merlin gloated only to freeze under Arthur’s glare. 

“That does not give you the right to bargain with your life again Merlin-“ Arthur’s tone left little room for argument, Merlin knew that but who was he if he didn’t challenge Arthur every chance he got. 

“But sire it worked! I was making her see reason-“ Arthurs rage came on faster than anyone expected. 

“Enough! You will not do it again and I will take care of this myself and there’s nothing further to discuss. Do you understand me Merlin?” 

Merlin didn’t care if he was huffing and pouting like a child, he was not going to agree. 

“Merlin?” Arthur asked again, his tone firm enough to cause a shiver down his spine as his challenging gaze met Arthur’s. 

They locked eyes a moment, Arthur’s unwavering as he waited for Merlin to fold. Merlin held out for a moment then another before finally relenting. “Yes sire.” 

Merlin had always had the uncanny ability of making any title sound like an insult and that clearly hadn’t changed at all. Arthur just shook his head without so much as bothering to respond, he was used to Merlin’s sass after all. “Hurry up and drink your last potion.” 

Much to everyone’s surprise Merlin did so without further complaint. 

“I can’t believe that actually worked.” Ron interjected before his brain caught up with him. 

Harry snickered like the brat he was despite Merlin’s glare. “Yeah clearly we just need his majesty over here to convince his stubborn ass to behave.” Harry joked. 

“I will turn you into a toad Harry-“ Merlin argued. 

“With what magic?” Draco interjected. 

“I’d rather know what’s going on outside.” Hermione asked, her eyes looking to Harry and Ron. 

“Well we’ve managed to get the civilians out, floos and apparition points are closed off for the time being so the aurors, healers and ministry staff are all that are left.” Ron explained. 

“And Skeeter is also holding vigil outside cause this is the ‘story of the millennia’” Harry added with obvious disgust. 

“I vote to turn her into a toad first.” Merlin offered not that anyone was paying him any attention.  

“At least now we don’t have to worry about casualties. What about the death eaters?” Hermione asked. 

“Rounded the whole lot up. Robards is interrogating them himself and with any luck he won’t be back till the duel begins.”  Ron advised. 

“When does it begin exactly? I don’t know what the hell a candle-mark even is.” Harry asked looking between Arthur and Merlin. 

“Do you not use candles to watch time?” Arthur asked turning to Merlin. 

“Not in centuries and it’s an hour and 20 minutes past noon Harry.” Merlin advised. 

Ron pulled out his pocket watch to check for himself. “We’ve got about 20 minutes, how about we leave you two to get some rest?”

Merlin smiled and nodded, he wouldn’t ask but he desperately needed a moment to get his bearings. 

Once they were gone it was finally just Arthur and Merlin. 

Chapter Text

“Your friends are an interesting bunch.” Arthur said once they were alone. He took his chair and moved it to be closer to Merlin so he could watch over him. 

“They’re good people and they mean well.” Merlin offered, unsure of what to say. He’d imagined seeing Arthur again a million times over but now that he was here in front of him he hadn’t a clue what to do. 

Arthur looked around, his eyes moving over the inside of the tent and then back to Merlin. “What is this place exactly? It does not seem to be anything like the Albion I remember.”

Merlin smiled gently and nodded wistfully. “A lot has changed since then, even I have trouble keeping up with all of it these days. This place is called Diagon Alley, it is a hidden marketplace for witches and wizards in the city of London.”

Arthur nodded even though he struggled to truly appreciate what it all meant. “Why is it hidden? Your kind aren’t still persecuted are they?” 

Merlin smiled at his concern, it warmed his heart to think that the king cared about him and his people. “No no, we decided a long time ago that it was best we live separately from the non-magic folks. If they know of our existence they come to fear us so we live within our own society in secret.” 

Arthur leaned back as he considered the proposition. A part of him didn’t like the idea of anyone having to hide and live in secrecy but even he had to admit it solved a great problem that he had struggled with throughout his reign. He couldn’t count how many times he tried to legalize magic only to be met with enormous pushback. When it came to power of any kind, those who did not have it would always come to fear it. 

“And they don’t bother you? At all?” Arthur asked curiously but Merlin just smiled and shook his head before flinching at the ache in his head. 

“Are you alright?” Arthur rushed to ask, his worry obvious but Merlin waved off his concern. 

“They do not believe we exist. They believe magic to be the thing of fairytales and we work very hard to ensure they’re unaware of us.” Merlin explained. “This way we can live peacefully, we have our own way of life, our own schools to educate our children, our own government to oversee us all. It is not perfect but it is safer this way.” 

Arthur nodded as he considered the idea and he had to admit it was a great improvement compared to the persecution’s and slaughters he had witnessed during his time. 

“Has it really been 1500 years? Since I’ve been gone?” Arthur asked softly, the realization of all that was lost finally settled over him. 

Merlin nodded, his eyes distant as he confirmed what Harry had told him. His mind taking him to all the time in between this moment and that fateful day. The fear that had reared its ugly head earlier still sat with the sorcerer but all he could do was hope that somehow things would be different this time around. 

“How is it that you… that you look the way you do?” Arthur wasn’t willing to ask how he was still alive, he didn’t dare to when he was just thankful that he was. 

“Still unfortunately ugly sire?” He joked as Arthur rolled his eyes. 

“Well you could always look worse. I mean I once saw you sleeping in a pile of dung-“ Arthur joked causing Merlin to smile again. He’d give anything to keep that silly smile on his face. 

“Very funny. My magic allows me to control my appearance and age, I prefer to stay younger after all aging has its limitations.” Merlin explained as Arthur nodded along. 

“I suppose that makes some sense. Do you reside in this place? Your friend Harry mentioned Camelot… he said it was gone.” Arthur asked gently but the way Merlin’s vision clouded with pain forced him to pause. “Merlin?” 

The sorcerer broke from his sudden melancholy and shrugged. “It was so long ago. I … we don’t have time to-“ 

Arthur nodded, he was right after all. This was a conversation that could wait until there wasn’t a looming threat. 

“But I live here- well not here here. Harry has a home in London where we live-“ Merlin began to explain. 

“Ahh that would explain your closeness.” Arthur pointed out. “He seems interesting to say the least, though his wake up call leaves much to be desired. It was almost as bad as yours.” 

Merlin laughed, he couldn’t help it, Harry was a lot of things but patient or gentle were not on that list. “You haven’t seen anything yet, that man is a force of nature.” 

“You care a great deal for him don’t you?” Arthur knew he didn’t need to ask the question. He had seen the way he had held him, how hard he worked to lessen his concern. Merlin smiled and nodded, he couldn’t help it and he wouldn’t hide just how deeply he cared for his friends. 

“He’s a good man. He helped me at a time when I needed it the most simply out of the goodness of his heart and I have come to love him dearly. He’s like a little brother to me. I think you will come to like him a great deal.” Merlin admitted but Arthur laughed. 

“I think I already do. He’d have made a fine knight.” Arthur admitted, it took a strong character to look Arthur Pendragon in the eye and try to order him around. More importantly his loyalty towards Merlin was more than enough to make Arthur like him. 

“He is, well he and Ron are as close to knights as our world gets.” Merlin explained. 

“And what about you? I always thought you’d make a fair knight if your weren’t so damn clumsy.” Arthur joked making Merlin roll his eyes. 

“No thanks. I’m a physician the same way I always was. I like helping people not hurting them.” He admitted softly. 

Arthur sighed as he nodded. “It never was in your nature was it? To think that you had to do so much of it because of me-“ It had greatly bothered Arthur just how much had been hidden from him, not just because he was lied to but because it meant Merlin had put himself into great danger and he’d been entirely unaware. 

“I’d do it again in a heartbeat.” Merlin admitted without wavering for even a second.

Arthur watched him closely for moment before he smiled gently back at him. “I’ve never thought myself deserving of your loyalty-“ 

“You are Arthur. I believe in you, I always have.” Merlin couldn’t help but to wear his heart on his sleeve and in that moment he wanted, no needed Arthur to know that he never once wavered. “You will succeed today, if anyone can get through to Morgana it is you.”  

“That’s funny, I distinctly remember a certain someone begging me not to fight her?” Arthur teased as Merlin glared at him. 

“Yes well it’s not like I can talk you out of it now that you’ve thrown the ruddy gauntlet. Which I still think was a stupid decision, why would you give her the opportunity to try and kill you?!” Merlin lectured much to Arthur’s amusement. He should have been annoyed by it, he had always hated the mere idea of someone questioning his judgment but Merlin was always the exception to his rules wasn’t he. 

“I see your worrying hasn’t changed in the slightest.” Arthur joked garnering another glare. God how he enjoyed riling Merlin up, his face would get all red and he’d get that annoyed look in his eyes. Something about it  made him feel far less out of place than he had only moments ago. 

“Yes well when you have an ass for a king-“

“Oi!”

“It can’t be helped can it?” Merlin looked far too proud of himself at his own joke.

Arthur smiled. How could he not smile at that cheeky grin?

———

Morgana had spent the better part of the past hour stewing. 

She had returned back to the place those useless men had originally taken her, but this time alone. 

The house was entirely empty or so she had thought until she had heard soft crying coming from somewhere within the house. 

Much to her horror she had come across a holding cell with a prisoner. A young witch  who called herself Adeline Gibbins. 

She’d released the girl immediately, as the poor witch had begged and pleaded with her not to hurt her. Morgana had to assure her that she was safe but she couldn’t understand for the life of her why those people would have locked up one of their own kind. 

When she asked, the poor girl had then told her that her parents we’re non-magic folks and the people who had summoned her to this world planned to use her to take over the world, murder those they didn’t deem to have pure blood and then subjugate the non-magic people. 

Morgana couldn’t quite believe it but the poor girl had seemed so honest and shaken that she had to be telling the truth. 

She had asked Morgana to let her return to her family with tears in her eyes as she had watched her with fear. She’d hatred seeing that fear. 

She healed her injuries before she had let her go free. The girl was so thankful, and it was obvious that she had believed herself doomed. The poor thing had been covered with cuts and bruises, all signs indicating that she had undergone ruthless torture at the hands of those men. 

It was unsettling… 

Even after all this time it was obvious that people intended to use and manipulate her for their own gains and while she hadn’t trusted those men they had still managed to mislead her. 

She thought back to what Merlin had said to her during their fight. He said their people were free. Safe to practice their magic and live in peace. 

Peace seemed like such a foreign concept all of a sudden. 

Could there really be peace in this world? And what about those men who clearly meant to unravel whatever peace there was. She expected people to use cruel methods against those who had wronged them somehow. But not against their own kind. 

More importantly there was the fact that Merlin had been telling the truth. 

She paced up and down the main room of the now empty house as she played the fight out in her mind. 

Merlin had been relieved to see her. Merlin had not attacked her, not even once. Moreover, he was ready to lay down his life if that was what it would take to repent for his own sins. 

She had been so sure that it was all a trick, that he’d attack her the second she made her final attack. 

But no such attack had come. If Arthur had not arrived, she would have been able to kill him. 

He would have let her. 

But now what was she to do? What choice did she have but to continue to seek her revenge?

_____

“Arthur she’ll be here before long. Are you sure we shouldn’t just try to capture her?” Merlin offered as he adjusted Arthur’s armour. Truth be told he wasn’t really adjusting anything he just needed something to keep him busy as the time for the duel approached. 

Arthur sighed, he’d been asked the same thing 7 different times at this point. “I’m sure Merlin. The last thing we should do is try to mislead her. If she choses to put down her sword that’s a choice she alone must make.” 

“But what if she uses magic against you-“

“She would not break the knights code-“ Arthur argued. 

“I know you want to believe that but-“

“But nothing Merlin. If I am wrong then so be it.” Arthur finished, unwilling to continue the conversation. He looked outside to see the position of the sun, it was time. 

As he marched out of the tent Merlin’s hand pulled him back to stop him. 

“Merlin-“ he didn’t finish the sentence as he felt the tingle of magic against his skin. “What the hell was that?!”

Merlin looked down at his feet, embarrassed. “In case she uses magic the spell will protect you-“

“I swore to her that there would be no magic-“ Arthur argued, immediately annoyed by Merlin’s interference. 

“Arthur I swear it will only protect you against magic. It won’t interfere with your duel I swear it!” 

Arthur sighed as he looked at Merlin, he knew he should be angrier with him but as Merlin looked up at him with those big eyes filled with worry he found his own tongue to be tied. 

“No more magic. You know what your physicians said earlier Merlin.” 

Merlin smiled and nodded so happily that Arthur couldn’t even hold his actions against him. A voice in the back of his head that sounded suspiciously like his father told him he was growing too soft but damn it all to hell. He’d already died once with a lifetimes worth of things unsaid between them he wasn’t about to make that mistake again. 

“I’ll get her back Merlin.” He assured him and Merlin nodded with tears in his eyes. 

“I know you will sire.” Merlin agreed before finally making their way outside. 

Arthur walked out to the platform and removed his cape, handing it to Merlin before climbing up onto the platform. He drew his sword and placed it before him, his hands firm on its hilt as he waited. 

All Merlin could do was stand at the edge of the platform as he clutched the cape in his hands hoping against all hope that he wouldn’t have to watch someone he loved die before his eyes. 

He was taken out of his thoughts by Harry’s arm around his shoulder. He couldn’t help but to lean into him for comfort.

“You have to trust him Em’. Thats all we can do.” 

Merlin nodded, shivering under the cold winter winds and his own anxieties. Ron, Hermione and Draco had flanked on either side of him and all they could do was stand back and hope for the best. 

——

Morgana appeared in a puff of smoke the same way she had left. 

This time however she was dressed as a knight, her chainmail black in comparison to the silver she had once worn and her hair braided making her look more like the Morgana they had once known and loved. 

“We don’t have to do this Morgana.” Arthur said the moment she met his eyes. “We don’t have to fight to the death.”

The witch glared back at him and drew her sword ready to do exactly what she was here to do. Win and destroy him once and for all. She would not be swayed by his falsities. 

“It is our fate Arthur. It is foolhardy to fight it.” She had sounded so resigned to it, probably because she was and had been for a very long time. 

“But by whose design? Is this who you truly wish to be? I do not blame you for harbouring the hatred that you do but who is it that you’re fighting me or our father?” Arthur demanded as he looked his sister in the eye and asked the question that was eating away at him. 

“Draw your sword Arthur!” Morgana seethed at the mere mention of the man. How dare he call that monster her father. “And don’t you dare call that man my father!”

Arthur sighed as he took his position. They  walked to each other and then walked three steps back as Merlin counted them down. 

Around the platform the remaining aurors, healers, ministry staff and press stood in wonder at what they were about to witness. 

After all there wasn’t a witch or wizard in their world that hadn’t grown up knowing of the old stories. To think that they’d be witness to a battle between King Arthur and Morgana Le Fey was beyond comprehension. This was the thing of legends and yet they all waited with bated breath terrified of what this could mean. 

Ron watched the different people in attendance closely, the way Shacklebolt stood at attention, his wand in hand incase Morgana turned on them. The way that Robards and the Aurors were looking back and forth between Morgana and Merlin. The way that the healers were whispering to each other, probably still reeling from the revelation that their newest recruit was Merlin himself. 

The tension in the air could be cut with a knife and as their swords clashed once more, the sound echoing throughout the emptied street. 

Morgana did everything she could to out maneuver Arthur, every time he would charge she would twist and turn ensuring that his hits could not land. Beating Arthur with pure strength was next to impossible but no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t seem to find an opening. 

She pulled back panting, unwilling to give up and while his breathing was laboured. Their duel was not effecting him the way it was her. 

“Sister this is not who you are! You are kind and compassionate, you’re smart enough to know that this will not end well for you!” 

She sneared back at him. “You know nothing about me Arthur Pendragon. That girl is long gone-“ She shouted as she attacked him again but he pushed her back without difficulty. 

“What that girl wanted was to live in a world where she didn’t have to watch people be put to death for being who they are! Look around Morgana! Everything that you so desperately wanted for your people has already come to pass! They are free!” 

Morgana attacked him with all the power in her, as she landed a barrage of attacks but Arthur deflected them expertly. Her strategy was sloppy, she was letting her emotions get in the way of her tactical judgment and as she grew more desperate the tides of the duel began to turn. 

“Morgana do not let the memory of Uther ruin the one chance you have at a future the way he has already ruined our past!” Arthur begged as he pushed Morgana back, it took her less then a second to catch her own footing before she attacked him again. This time hoping that he’d be unable to match her speed. 

“You know nothing about me Arthur!” She screamed as she attacked him again. 

Merlin couldn’t help but to clutch Arthur’s cape in his arms as he cried, not just for himself and Morgana but the pain he could see on Arthur’s face. 

“DAMN IT MORGANA YES I DO!” He shouted back as their swords clashed again. “YOU’RE MY SISTER!”

CLASH

“You’re the same girl who once nursed a baby bird who fell out of its nest back to health for months on end!” 

CLASH 

“I know because I was the one who held you as you cried all night when it finally flew away! Damn it I swore to you I’d never leave you the same way didn’t I?!” There were tears in his eyes as he thought back to their childhood. “You begged me to promise that I’d never abandon you and I gave you my word!” 

Morgana attacked again unwilling to stop long enough to think but Arthur was relentless. 

“You’re the same girl who’d sneak past the guards to bring me food when father would lock me in the dungeons for days on end!” Arthur shouted as their swords clashed. 

CLASH


“The same girl who would bandage my wounds in the dead of night so father wouldn’t find out!”

CLASH

There were tears in Morgana’s eyes but she fought through them just the same.

“You’re the same girl that threw herself on top of me so he couldn’t hit me again after I displeased him as a child!” The pain in Arthur’s voice was to much to bear. Merlin felt Harry pull him into his chest as he sobbed unable to watch the people he loved  hurt one another. 

“You’re the sister who saved me from becoming the monster that he wanted me to be!”  Arthur screamed as they clashed swords again and again and again until they were both panting. 

“You’re my sister Morgana!” Arthur shouted as tears finally fell down Morgana’s cheeks. 

“Not his daughter, not his ward but MY SISTER!” Arthur took his opening the second he saw it as he maneuvered for Morgana’s sword to fall from her hand at the exact moment he swiped her legs out from under her. 

She fell on her back, the fall knocking the wind out of her long enough for Arthur to put his sword to her neck. 

She opened her eyes to look up at him but the sight of him froze her. He was crying with tears cascading down his cheeks as he begged. 

“I do not wish to watch you die again sister. Lay down your arms and yield!” Arthur pleaded, uncaring of who may be watching. No one mattered at that moment except him and Morgana and he’d do anything to have her back. 

“We are doomed to destroy each other Arthur. That is our fate-“

“Do you think I care about such nonsense!? We have already destroyed each other sister! We have waged wars against each other, so much has been lost, so much blood has been spilled already. How much more needs to be lost for you to understand that you can make a different choice?!” 

“It cannot be- you will not let it be!”

“DAMN IT MORGANA WHEN HAVE YOU EVER KNOWN ME TO BEG?! I am begging you sister! Even my pride means nothing if I can finally get you to see reason!”

Morgana didn’t know what to do. Her hands tremored under the weight of his request while her heart pulled her in two directions but in her mind she knew that it was pointless to fight further. 

“Please My Lady I beg of you to see reason!” She heard Merlin yell off in the distance, her eyes found his in the crowd, his blue eyes were wet with tears. 

“Please Morgana. I have asked so little of you in this life, if there was ever a time in your life that you loved me I beg you to yield!” Arthur begged and fresh tears flooded Morgana’s eyes. 

She waited a moment, a part of her, the angry and vicious part of her was telling her to just let him kill her and have his victory but as she thought back to the empty darkness of her afterlife she found she couldn’t let her self die. 

“Please Morgana!” Arthur begged once more and as the tears fell from his face it struck her that in all the time she had known him he had never been so distraught. 

She looked back at Merlin again, his eyes pleading even from such a distance. Those same eyes she still knew how to read like the back of her hand. She looked back at Arthur and finally nodded. 

“I yield brother.” 

Arthur pulled the sword from her neck immediately before standing back. Morgana pushed herself to her feet, not meeting his gaze as she picked up her sword before walking to him, she mounted the sword into the platform before kneeling in front of Arthur as all his other knights had before her. 

Around them everyone stood in hushed silence, afraid that the smallest of sounds would somehow tip the scales. 

“I Morgana Pendragon, of the house of Pendragon, do swear my honour, my fealty, my loyalty and my life to my lord and king…Arthur Pendragon.” 

Arthur nodded as Morgana looked up at him waiting for her to continue. 

“I swear from this day forward to use this sword and this magic to protect you, to fight under your banner and in your name.” 

She waited for him but he stood watching her, waiting for her to continue. She looked to her right to see Merlin, Arthur’s cape still clutched in his arms, tears in his eye as he smiled and nodded for her to continue. 

“And I swear so long as I live, no harm will come to you or to Merlin by my hand.” 

Arthur nodded finally as he raised his sword to touch it to each of her shoulders. 

“You may rise Lady Morgana.” 

Before Morgana could fully stand up Arthur pulled her into his arms as he had so desperately wished he could for longer then he could remember. 

It was like a damn had finally broken as she let her brother pull her into a tight embrace while she wept into his shoulder. A millennia of heart ache and pain finally washing over her as she cried into him the way she had when she was just a child. 

Arthur didn’t let her go once, he would never let her go again. He swore on his sword and his life that he would always protect her. He whispered to her that he would not fail her again, never again. 

He hadn’t even realized Merlin had climbed up onto the platform but he was at his side almost immediately. 

“My lady I am so sorry for everything I have done I swear to you-“ the sorcerer apologized but Morgana couldn’t stop the tears as she pulled Merlin into her arms. 

“Promise me you won’t hurt me. Swear to me that you won’t I-“ she begged, his eyes clouded with tears as he nodded.