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Henry

Henry loved his life in New York, he really did. The brownstone he had bought was a dream. The youth shelter was blossoming beautifully and Henry himself was settling in nicely. Pez was around more and supported Henry like he always had while the blonde man even made some new friends along the way. The fact that there was an ocean between him, Philip, and his grandmother was another plus in his books.

And of course, New York meant Alex.

Alex.

His gorgeous, selfless, sweet, and absolute menace of a boyfriend. It’s been just over a year since Alex chased his idiotic ass to Kensington Palace and told Henry to fucking have him and yet Henry still struggled to believe this really was his life now. And that Alexander Claremont-Diaz decided to not only give him the time of day but also somehow along the way chose to love him unapologetically.

Despite their excitement to finally be on the same continent for longer than just 72 hours, both of them made the very grown-up decision to not move in with each other immediately. Henry did buy the brownstone for the purpose of them living together but despite their honeymoon phase, they knew there was time and space for the living together part. But right now, they needed to experience the relationship part first. Gone were the clandestine meetings, exchanged for date nights, sleepovers, handholding, mapping out each other’s body, and learning the other’s little things that made them them.

Of course, they had gotten to know each other over the course of the year, in between the lines of their countless emails, and in the whisper-soft quietness of their late-night calls; but having Alex at the tips of his fingers all day every day felt like getting to know him all over again. And they were basking in it. Especially Alex. The more Henry learned about Alex, the more he fell in love with he curly-haired man and his concealed but inherently deep-seated romantic self.

Henry knew he got to see a side of Alex not many people, if any, had the privilege of meeting and he was forever grateful and deeply humbled by it. It was nerve-wrecking and exciting, but most importantly nice, to figure out how to love Alex openly now that he didn’t have to hide his feelings that were never really concealed to begin with. Being back in the early stages of dating opened a whole new world for Henry. A world that had been locked behind royal duties and directives placed by the palace. It was thrilling. Especially knowing that he now was allowed to take up this space and find out what it meant to be Henry Fox after he had to stay in the shadow of Prince Henry for all his life. And knowing that Alex exhilarated in giving him this space and welcoming every step Henry made with open arms, filled him with so much love.

Ever since he made the move to the States five months ago, he also had started to discover more things about himself. Before Alex, this would have terrified him to no end and  - who was he kidding  - he wouldn’t have dared to go this route but he slowly started to take a fancy into this journey. Of course, it was still scary but at this point in time he had a real support system that was there in case he fell through. Of course, he always had Bea and Pez, but his sister had her own demons following her and his best friend deserved to live his own life from time to time, so having new people that still offered the same warmth and love just in different colours was helping Henry in a way he never thought he would be privy to.

When, along with Alex, June and Nora stumbled into his life, he never expected to gain two more older sisters but that was exactly how it felt. June had taken Henry under her wing after she had yelled at him a bit for being a fucking idiot (which he rightfully deserved) and now claimed he was her favourite. Henry knew it was mainly because she got to analyse Pride and Prejudice or Sense and Sensibility with him as often as she liked whereas Nora had banned the topic from their flat. (Henry was pleased as punch to have this little thing with June because it felt like she really was his friend and not only his boyfriend’s sister - not to mention her excellent views of English Literature.)

Nora on the other hand was slowly becoming his most favourite person which might had come as a shock to everyone and especially to Alex but Nora got him in a way no one else did. She understood his handling of his grief and was able to pull him out of a funk even before he knew he was heading into one. She had a way with him and his dark moods that not even Pez had perfected and she did not take any of Henry’s bullshit answers for face value but grilled him until he finally spilled what was going on. (Alex was adorably jealous of her magic ways as he called them and Henry rolled his eyes fondly at his pout whenever the topic came up. As if he wasn’t the sole reason for any of Henry’s smiles; as if he wasn’t the reason Henry wanted to learn how to handle his dark moods in a better healthier way; as if he wasn’t Henry’s whole entire world.) Also, Nora introduced him to the world of video games and he recently found he was thoroughly enjoying them quite a bit himself.

So yeah, Henry loved his little life in New York, he loved his friends, he loved his house, and he of course loved his Alex. But still. Something wasn’t quite right. And that something was slowly pushing its way to the forefront of his mind. Slowly but surely. And it was making him feel quite helpless if he was being honest to himself. (Henry was still working on the whole being-honest-to-himself part finding it quite difficult after years of denying himself everything he wanted but his therapist Marjorie was a major help  - and yes, Alex, it was a funny pun indeed - Henry chuckled despite himself.)

Of course, he was aware that he did not have to fight his mind on his own. He knew he was allowed to ask for help but Henry has never been particularly good at asking for help. Not since his dad…a sharp little sting replaced the usually dull ache for a second and Henry took a harsh breath willing the thought away.

Not now. Not when he was on his own and no one, and in particular not Alex, was here to hinder his feelings from spiralling. He ignored the little voice in his head that was whispering how his feelings had started to spiral in the past few weeks anyway but he was steadfastly not going down this road.

Henry sighed and dragged an icy cold hand over his tired face, realising with a start that he had completely zoned out for God knows how long. He spared a glance at the little alarm clock that was ticking softly on the heavy oak desk behind his laptop.

9:23pm.

Christ, where had his thoughts been for the past hour and half? He had just sat here and stared into nothingness. Well, that was mildly concerning. Thank God, no one was here to call him out for it. He knew Alex would sit him down with a steaming cup of camomile tea - I read that it’s the most soothing one for when your thoughts are frazzled, Hen. I will not give you Yorkshire tea when you need to settle down. - and proceed to hold him until Henry’s shoulders dropped and lost some of their tension. Until Henry was ready to spill what was bothering him.

But he couldn’t. Not right now. Not at the moment. Not in the next few weeks. Because you see, his boyfriend was a just a little over a month away from his finals and said boyfriend was stressed out of his mind already and if Henry and June didn’t drag his ass out of NYU’s law library at least three times a week, he would have probably moved in there by now. However, this also meant that Henry would not go and add more stress on Alex’s shoulders as long as it wasn’t something life-threatening or possibly internationally relevant. Lord knows his boy had enough on his plate and tried to outsmart his own brain. Even if he really didn’t need to stress himself out like this.

According to Oscar and June this was his default mode whenever it came to academia or something were he thought he had to prove his worth to others. Ever since they were thrusted into the damage control and started to build this tentative friendship that soon blossomed into white hot heat and eventually into all-consuming love, the prince had tried to unravel these deep-seated beliefs and insecurities in his boyfriend’s brilliant, brilliant mind.

Looking at the state Alex had been in for the better part of the past few weeks now, he hadn’t been as successful as he had hoped. Although Oscar had explained that Henry was the first and only one who had ever been able to fight the fog that surrounded Alex when he was in his bubble. And while this admission soothed Henry’s sorrows to a certain point, he still felt useless when he saw the dark circles that has reappeared on Alex’s beautiful brown skin and the way his curls had lost their shine with all the exasperated running-through they had to endure.

So, it was safe to say Henry was not adding to Alex’s stress if he could help it. Especially, with something so unbelievably insignificant as…

“Baby?” His favourite deep and slightly Texan rumble pulled him out of his thoughts that had started to wander again.

With a small start, he swivelled his chair around and was met with his boyfriend, dressed in soft looking chinos and an oversized navy NYU jumper that was softening the harsh edges of his obvious exhaustion.

“Alex? What are you doing here, love? I wasn’t expecting to see you tonight.” He asked with a rough voice before clearing his throat after a long day of not uttering a word.

The brown-eyed man raised his brow challengingly and crossed his arms. “Well, if it’s so inconvenient for me to be here, I can leave and look for cuddles somewhere else. I’m sure Cameron from International Law will be all too happy to offer some warmth,” he said with a playful glint in his tired eyes.

Henry gaped at him for a second before jumping up from his chair and taking three long steps right into Alex personal space. “Oh, Cameron can shove it.”

“Oh, can he now?” Alex whispered while opening his harms and offering Henry the space to step closer. Which the blonde man immediately did.

“Yes, he can. Unfortunately, you are not available for any proffered arms other than mine,” he growled softly making Alex’s eyes sparkle.

“Is that so?”

“It is,” Henry answered before cradling his boyfriend’s cheeks gently and pressing his lips hotly against Alex’s waiting mouth. His boyfriend opened up beautifully for him, granting entrance for Henry’s tongue which Henry accepted gratefully.

Alex’s hands dropped the leather bag he was still clutching and instead searched for leverage on Henry’s waist, drawing the older boy closer until they were pressed completely against each other.

Just then Henry realised exactly how long it has been since he last had the privilege of being kissed by Alex. Of being touched by him. Held by him. Of even seeing him. The past four days were so busy for the brunette boy with meetings, classes, and study groups that there simply was no time for anything else and Henry had begged him to just sleep when he had the chance.

A sudden wave of hot, burning need was rushing through Henry’s body when he registered that he finally had the opportunity for exactly that. To kiss, to touch, to hold. And lord, it was time.

Pressing himself impossibly closer to Alex’s smaller frame, he was elated to feel Alex mirroring his own hard-on that was straining against the zip of his jeans.

“Oh, it looks like someone’s missed me,” Alex chuckled playfully before tightening his grasp on Henry’s waist and rutted against him.

Henry swallowed his answering whimper and looked down into warm, soothing brown. “Yes, darling. I missed you,” he whispered and stroked Alex’s jaw gently. The other searched his eyes for a second, the heat between them paused momentarily, exchanged for whisper-soft longing as he said, “I missed you too, sweetheart. Couldn’t wait till tomorrow to see you that’s why I decided to change trains last minute and hopped on the one to you. Needed to hold you tonight.”

Another whimper bubbled up inside Henry’s chest, one that he absolutely couldn’t suppress even if he wanted to. He pressed his face into Alex’s neck and breathed in his comforting leather and cinnamon scent, his body relaxing for a second as the all-encompassing feeling of home invaded his senses. Henry wouldn’t mind staying in this moment forever.

 As a warm, soft hand started exploring the skin underneath Henry’s knit jumper and a long, long finger teased the sensitive skin around his hip bone, he sighed softly and pressed himself closer to his love.

“Please,” he whispered, his face still hidden in Alex’s neck before he started trailing butterfly kisses up and down the younger man’s throat.

“What do you need, baby?” Alex asked while opening the button on Henry’s jeans, letting them fall to the ground without another thought.

Henry shuddered at the roughness in his boyfriend’s voice and his stomach lurched in excitement.

“Wanna taste you,” he mumbled, a sudden need to please filling him, the need to prove to himself that he was not spiralling, that everything was fine, at least as long as he had Alex here in his arms.

Without another word he pressed the brunette against the wall next to the door and fell to his knees as gracefully as he could. Henry glanced up to gather Alex’s reaction as he was met with dark, lust-filled eyes that were lit up with a hunger which made Henry shiver pleasantly.

“Go on then, sweetheart,” Alex purred and Henry stopped thinking all together, letting himself be guided by pleasure. He leaned forward and nuzzled Alex’s clothed bulge softly, already getting impossibly harder by the faint smell of musk he could make out through the dark denim. Encouraged by Alex’s moan, Henry popped open the button of Alex’s jeans to pull down the offending fabric. In one swift motion he ripped off the grey briefs underneath. When he leaned forward to brush a kiss against Alex’s tip and pushed up the other’s jumper, the whole thing felt dirty, rushed, and perfect. Something about having Alex half naked between himself and a wall was reminding him of times when they only had dirty, rushed, and not so perfect, but it was the start of their history and despite everything else going on, Wimbledon was still something he had fond memories of.

His kisses quickly turned into kitten licks that had Alex’s legs tremble slightly, the urge to fuck Henry’s mouth obvious in the way his thigh muscles were tensing slightly. An eager moan left Henry’s mouth before he took Alex in his warm mouth, suckling the head gently before sinking down as far as he could.

“Jesus, fuck,” Alex swore under his breath, his hands finding their way into Henry’s hair, a gentle grip to let him know he’s there. Henry hummed appreciatively and doubled his efforts, his own erection pulsing hot in his underwear.

It didn’t take long for Alex to pant heavily, his broken profanities interrupted by a steady stream of moans. Henry knew his boy was close, he reached up and tapped his hip gently in three quick successions, their sign to let the other know it was fine to let go.

Alex groaned deeply and tightened his hold on Henry’s blonde hair and finally let go of the tension he held in his thighs.

“Fuck, baby, so good, always so good, my best boy,” he murmured making Henry blush a deep cherry red.

It only took him three, four thrusts as he fucked into Henry’s warm heat for him to spill and come with an exhausted sigh down the older boy’s throat. When he was spent, Henry pulled off and kissed the tip again before pulling his briefs up, making Alex chuckle slightly.

“C’mere, sweetheart.” With a gentle grip on his arms, Alex pulled Henry back up and pulled him close to his body.

Alex reached for Henry’s boxer shorts while nibbling softly on his neck, “lemme return the favour, gorgeous.”

“No need,” Henry replied, a soft blush illuminating his cheeks.

Alex pulled back with a small frown. “Wha-“ He began but his frown was exchanged for a wicked smile. “Oh. Someone really was eager,” he teased with a laugh.

“Oh, shut up will you?” Henry pinched his nipples with a small pout. “It’s been a minute alright.”

At that Alex’s face fell. “I’m sorry, baby. I know I’ve been terribly busy lately-“

Henry pushed a finger against Alex’s plush lips. “I am gonna stop you right there. What we’re not gonna do is apologise for stuff that does not need apologising. You are in exam prep, you have important things to do, your schedule is giving me heartburn just thinking about it - which says a lot  -, and I promise you my dick won’t fall off because it has to take the back burner for a few days.”

Alex stared at him for a second; still not entirely used to Henry when he let go of his princely behaviour to take the explicit lane that Alex himself frequented more often than not. (New York, Nora, and of course Alex himself had taught Henry a thing or two since moving here and while it was still challenging and not his comfort zone, it did feel quite freeing to do so from time to time.)

His boyfriend studied him for a moment and Henry made sure his eyes were conveying his message. When Alex found what he was looking for, his own brown eyes softened again and he dragged Henry into another hug.

With his face hiding in Henry’s shoulder, he murmured. “I love you so much, thanks for not being a dick about all of this and I’m very sorry to your dick, it is a very nice-“

“Alright, you absolute demon, that’s quite enough out of you,” Henry interrupted him with a fond eyeroll, rubbing Alex’s back gently, “I think it is bedtime for you, mister.”

Alex chuckled and pressed another kiss to the skin of Henry’s neck. “Haven’t slept in a real bed for like three days, so that’s sweet, and on top of that you will be in said bed? Even sweeter, baby.”

Henry sighed and closed his eyes, he hated when Alex played his stress down and tried to joke about it because he knew it stemmed from a place of insecurities and years of stating he was fine when he wasn’t, at least not really.

“Yeah, let’s get you to bed. David has missed you too.”

Alex looked up and smiled tiredly. “Oh, yes puppy time!” He pulled back and looked down at their bodies, his smile turning into a laugh.

Henry followed his gaze and couldn’t stop his own giggles. Both of them were still standing with their trousers halfway down their legs, Henry’s boxers hung low, and Alex’s briefs askew at best. They were in a right state.

“Yes, it it definitely bedtime, c’mon love,” Henry said and walked over to his laptop to save the document he was working - or rather trying to work - on before shutting it down. He closed the blinds and turned off the lights, the room now only bathed in the soft glow of the hallway lights.

When he was done, he grabbed Alex’s hand and guided him up the stairs towards his bedroom where they made quick work of their night-time routine before he pushed his boyfriend into bed and kissing his forehead. “I’ll go let David out again and make some tea. I won’t be a moment, alright? You want anything, darling?”

“I’m good, thanks baby. Now bring me my puppy,” he answered with a yawn, making grabby hands at Henry. The older boy shook his head fondly and made his way downstairs towards the kitchen where David was already waiting in front of the back door.

“Hello, old boy. Sorry, I forgot the time there. You’re not mad at me, are you?” He cooed softly while unlocking the door. David just pressed himself to Henry’s leg for a second before running out on to the patio and down into the garden.

Henry pulled an old light blue cardigan over his pj’s before following his dog down onto the cold gras. October was coming to an end and the weather really was starting to turn. Autumn was in full swing with the first tentative seconds of winter bleeding in. Henry had always loved autumn, especially the ones in the Scottish countryside, but nothing could have prepared him for autumn in New York. There was something magical about the way the leaves changed and everything was just so colourful while getting ready for winter amidst the hustle and bustle of the city.

Henry breathed in deeply and let the cool night air enter his lungs while David was running around him. For something quicker than a heartbeat he missed the quiet calm of their family home in Scotland or the eeriness of the lake house in Texas with how lively and bustling Brooklyn was even in the dead of the night. For as much as he loved New York, he was longing for some tranquility from time to time.

Henry wrapped his arms around his middle, trying to fight off the chill while following David with his eyes. The night sky above him was vast and dark, yet not really. Light pollution made it impossible to see anything other than murky black. His chest squeezed painfully.

And wasn’t that the whole problem? A glance up to the sky wasn’t the same anymore, wasn’t what it used to be. Didn’t bring him the relief and comfort it once did. And it hurt. And he hated himself for letting such a small detail have such a huge impact on himself. But the sky was dark.

Empty.

Just a black canvas of nothingness.

Nothing.

No stars.

No Orion.

No Dad.

Henry took a shuttering breath and closed his eyes from the onslaught of emotions that threatened to overcome him. He was fine. He did not need a constellation in the sky to feel close to his dad.

Except he kind of did. And looking at the empty darkness over the brownstone reminded him of how far away his dad really was. How long he had to go through life without him. How he would never be able to witness the happiness Henry has found in Alex. How Henry had fought for a life away from the crown. How he had made a life for himself. How Henry was finally allowed to be his true self.

Looking for Orion had always been his way of connecting with his dad.

When his dad was still with him, he used to take him outside in the middle of the night - without his mother’s knowledge of course - and he would bring Henry down to the pond at the edge of their home or the wide field behind their summer house in Scotland and teach him all about constellations, their placements, and their meanings.

“Do you have a favourite?” A tiny Henry of about seven years old asked Arthur in his memory. “A favourite? Why thank you for this excellent question, Hen! I do indeed and it is the coolest one in my humble opinion. Let me introduce you to Orion!” Arthur crouched down next to Henry and positioned him in a way that he was able to see a new picture in the sky. “Turn your head slightly to the left, darling. And now up a bit, and right there it is. Orion.” Henry searched the night sky with his myriad of twinkling stars, feeling small and seen, trying to make out where his dad was pointing. “Can you see this big, bright star there?” His dad asked him softly and Henry followed his hand that was pointing to a bright and pretty spot in the sky. He hummed in awe. “See, that is Orion’s Belt and going out from there you can make out the whole constellation. The name ‘Orion’ comes from Greek mythology. In Greek mythology, Orion was a mighty hunter known for his incredible strength and skill. He was often depicted as a giant, holding a cub and wearing a lion’s skin. The constellation of Orion is said to represent this legendary figure.” His dad explained, helping Henry to understand the picture.

“Oh wow,” the young boy breathed, in awe of the story behind the little lights. “Told you it was cool,” his dad winked at him and hugged him close against the chilly air of the night. “What does it mean?” Henry asked, by now familiar with his dad’s star teachings. “Another excellent question, my boy. You are full of them, aren’t you?” Arthur tickled Henry’s side gently, making his son giggle. “Well for the Ancient Greek, looking up to the Orion’s Belt meant remembering the strength of the huntsman Orion and they were drawing from that strength to inspire their own pursuits and for the ancient Egyptians it was associated with rebirth and eternal life meaning that no one leaves the world for good even if you cannot see them anymore. And most importantly Orion has also been used by stargazers and sailors to navigate their journey and offered them guidance and clarity on where to go in your life.” Henry listened attentively to his dad’s words and decided then and there to keep them in his heart. “You’re right dad, Orion is the coolest!” Arthur’s answering smile was one of Henry’s most cherished memories he had of his dad.

A few years after that, in a cold hospital room, in an even colder London, with his dad hooked up on a myriad of machines, Arthur pulled a taller, quiet, and scared Henry into his side. “Remember what I told you, bud. Whenever you need me, whenever you miss me, whenever you want to talk to me, just look for Orion and I will be with you no matter when and where. Always keep in mind that it will guide you and offer you clarity on uncertainties in your life. If you follow your heart, you’ll be on the right path. And I will be there with you, every step of the way. I’ll be your Orion, the one that never really leaves even if you can’t see it. You got this, Hen, I believe in you.” Another tear fell down Henry’s pale face as he searched the sunken eyes of his father. He knew the end was near. He knew he needed to say goodbye and reassure his dad that he would be fine. But how was he supposed to be fine without the most important person in the world? It was impossible. Living seemed impossible. “Henry, sweetheart, promise me. If you ever feel lost, just look for Orion and I won’t be far. You can face your fears, overcome every challenge life throws at you, and make strong decisions in your life. And I will be with you, I promise.” “Me too, Dad,” he whispered brokenly before hiding his face in his father’s neck…

“Henry?” A deep voice pulled him out of his thoughts. With a start he wiped away the tears that had started running down his cheeks in steady streams before turning around looking for the source of the voice.

When he looked towards the house, he was met with the sight of a disheveled Alex standing in the open patio door, his curls wild and the knitted blanket from the window seat draped around him. He glanced at Henry with tired eyes that were filled with worry.

Shit, how long did he stay out here?

“Baby, is everything alright? You’ve been gone for over half an hour and it’s bloody freezing outside, did something happen?”

Henry cleared his throat and hoped to God Alex couldn’t make out his tear-stained face from the small distance between them. “No, no I’m fine, I’m sorry, love, I just got side-tracked and the air was nice.” Henry said with a small shrug, hoping Alex would not ask further questions. His heart was in a fragile state and all he wanted to do was fall into Alex’s arms and have a good cry about it. But he couldn’t bother Alex with this. Not right now.

“Promise your bed is much nicer than this cold, especially since I am in it, and I would love to cuddle my gorgeous, gorgeous boyfriend and share some warmth,” Alex replied with a small smile that didn’t reach his eyes. Henry could kick himself.

“The boyfriend would like that very much. Let me just lock up everything and I’ll be right behind you.” At Alex’s raised eyebrow, Henry chuckled softly and crossed his fingers, “Promise.”

“Fine. But if you’re not snuggled up on my chest in about four minutes, I will drag your perfect lil ass up to bed myself,” Alex replied with a wink before disappearing back into the darkness of the house.

Henry took a deep breath and chastised himself for his behaviour. He couldn’t be so careless and worry Alex. Not while he was prepping for his very first finals of law school. His boyfriend was stressed enough as it is, he would rather end himself than add to the ever-growing mountain on Alex’s shoulders. Especially with something stupid as stars, a voice that sounded distinctly like Philip sneered in his head. He rubbed a rough hand over his face and looked around for David, just to realise the Beagle must have followed Alex inside because he was the only one still occupying their small garden space.

Get a grip, Fox.

A cool burst of air let Henry shiver in his thin pyjamas and only then did he realise that Alex was right. It was bloodyfreezing. He quickly crossed his arms and made his way back into the brownstone, looking the doors and turning off the lights - the sudden need to be as close to Alex as possible consuming him completely.

Not more than a minute later, Henry entered their - no, not yet - his bedroom and was met with the sight of Alex curled up in his side gently scratching David’s belly who was lying next to him. His heart seized with love.

“Is there some space for me left or do y’all want some privacy?” He drawled with a smile.

“This was the worst attempt at a Texan drawl in like ever. Atrocious. Thank God, you’re cute. Now, get in here.” Alex whined before pressing a kiss to David’s ear and positioned him on the end of the bed. “Love you, old man. Sleep well,” he whispered and Henry really wanted to marry the hell out of this incredible human being. He couldn’t wait for next spring when…

“Hen, darling. I love you but if you’re not in bed in the next ten seconds I might start yelling at you a little bit, softly and with love of course, but yelling nonetheless.”

Henry blushed and shook his head with a small deprecating smile. “Alright, alright. ‘m sorry, dear.” He pulled off his cardigan and walked over to his side of the bed before crawling into the soft dark grey sheets as Alex turned off his bedside lamp. (He would forever be thanking Petz for talking him into getting these ridiculously expensive high threat count sheets even if his best friend never had to know.)

As soon as his back hit the mattress, he was pulled into a strong, warm body that fitted the empty shape in his heart perfectly. When he settled down with his back to Alex’s chest, his racing thoughts came to a gentle stop, letting him take the first real breath in what felt like hours. He sighed content and pulled his boyfriend’s arm tighter around his waist.

Alex’s answer came in form of a gentle kiss below his ear before he nuzzled his face into Henry’s neck. “Now we’re talking,” he mumbled, his own real Texan drawl always so much deeper when he was tired. Henry could feel Alex’s smile against his skin. He hummed in response.

“Good night, darling,” he said into the darkness but was met with nothing more than a soft puff of air against his shoulder.

He closed his eyes, hoping sleep would come quick, despite the missing shine of the stars.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

Henry was slowly pulled back to consciousness by a hand drawing mindless shapes on the skin of his lower back where his sleep shirt had ridden up. He kept his eyes closed for a moment longer, enjoying the gentle ministrations of Alex’s fingers while reacquainting himself with his surroundings.

Sometime during the night, they must have shifted because Henry no longer was the little spoon. He was now lying on Alex’s chest, his head resting right over his boyfriend’s heart where it was beating soft and steady. He pressed a small smile into the warm, brown skin breathing in Alex’s leather and cinnamon scent that somewhere along the lines has become the definition of home.

The blonde man shifted slightly, his hips moving against the strong muscle of Alex’s thighs while sparks erupted all over his body. A small moan escaped his lips. An answering chuckle could be heard from over his head.

“Well, good morning baby,” Alex said with a rasp, his morning voice still deliciously shot.

“Mhh, good morning my love,” Henry answered pressing himself closer to the body beneath him. Alex groaned in response and bucked his hips up just once before placing his hand on Henry’s lower back stopping his movement.

Henry frowned before opening his eyes. He blinked against the bright morning light that was coming in through the large bay window by his side of the bed. He lifted his head slightly to take a glimpse at Alex’s face and he was met with tired eyes behind askew glasses, unruly curls, and a tense set of lips. The light bubbly excitement he had felt upon waking flew out of the window.

“What’s wrong?” Henry asked trying to sit up but he realised the hand that was not lying on his back was holding up a textbook over Henry’s head. Alex had clearly been studying while Henry had used his body like a mattress, his deadweight probably not helping his boy to concentrate on whatever he was reading.

Alex put down the heavy book with a sigh and placed it next to his opened MacBook, his iPad laying right next to it lighting up with incoming emails. “As much as I would love to continue where this is going, I am afraid that I don’t have the time to satisfy your needs right now,” his boyfriend winced apologetically and the worry in Henry’s stomach doubled.

Henry rolled off of his boyfriend and slowly sat himself on his side of the mattress looking at Alex in worry realising exactly how stressed he looked. The brunette man ruffled his curls with another sigh and tried to grab Henry’s hand but couldn’t quite reach.

“Alex, why are you still in bed when you clearly have stuff to do? You could’ve just woken me up or pushed me off.”

“As if I’d just push you away,” Alex huffed trying to make a joke out of it. But Henry had become quite efficient in reading his love, meaning he knew Alex was about a minute away from jumping out of his skin and he hated himself a little bit for hindering Alex from doing what he needed to do.

Henry shuffled closer, careful not to disarrange the books and papers strewn on the bed. Softly, he placed a hand on Alex’s cheek and ran a finger under his eyes wishing to wipe off the dark circles marring his gorgeous skin.

“My darling, honesty game: what’s currently on your mind?” Henry asked, hinting at the game Jack and Ellie did in Kiss her once for me, their current read in their little book club Nora had brought into life - and Henry’s newest obsession.

Alex gave him a look and sighed. “So, there might be a chance that I am currently supposed to be somewhere else?” He asked sheepish.

Henry’s eyes grew wide. “What?”

“There might have been a mock trial study group an hour ago and a now there’s a comp law one starting in 30.”

“Alexander.”

“What? You were sleeping so peacefully I couldn’t bring myself to leave,” Alex whined. “And besides! I’ve already been studying for four hours so it’s not too bad that I missed the study groups!”

Henry’s eyes grew large as saucers. “You let me sleep on you while you’ve been working for four hours? What on earth, Alex!” A heavy stone burned a hole in Henry’s stomach feeling guilty for keeping Alex from working, his stress levels must be through the roof. Christ.

Alex shrugged a small blush highlighting his cheeks. “Your weight helped me concentrate.”

Another flash of pain in his stomach. He knew his love was stressed out of his mind but he hadn’t grasped how much he was struggling and the guilt of not being there for Alex because he was dealing with something so silly threatened to drown him.

“Oh darling, c’mere.” He pulled Alex into his side, kissing his temple softly. “While I absolutely adore to be your weighted blanket, it probably is not the most practical or comfortable for your back to be studying in bed for so many hours. Especially since you shoulder has been bothering you again lately,” Henry murmured quietly while playing with the soft brown locks, smoothing them down.

Alex hid his face in Henry’s neck, huffing slightly in defeat. “You might be right about that.”

“That’s because I’m right about most things, dear.”

“Alright, smart ass. Can’t come from your lineage tho,” Alex shot back, the air getting lighter already.

“That, I cannot argue with. So now tell me, what’s on your to-do list for the day? Can’t have you miss more very important lawyer-to-be things because I decided to be a lazy bum and sleep until 10, Christ, I can’t believe I slept that long. Pez must be wondering where the hell I am,” Henry realised with a start.

“Don’t worry, I texted him that you’d be out of office today and he replied with three eggplant emojis, so you should be fine,” Alex snickered. Henry pinched his nipple in retaliation, rolling his eyes fondly. Pez and Alex’s friendship really was something else. Not to mention that Henry was elated that his two favourite people on earth were getting along like a house on fire.

“Well, there is obviously no time for any eggplant action,” Alex interrupted with a sad whine, “let’s go back to my original question: what’s on your to-do today?”

“Well, after the two study groups, Raf wanted to meet up for lunch and help me with a few questions I had for international law, and then i’ve got a lecture - the only one for today luckily - and after that I’m supposed to meet Hunter, Aria, and Louis to discuss our strategies for the oral exam in law and communications, and then I need to go the library and get another textbook my professor recommended for the exam in civil law.”

Henry blinked at him for a second trying to stomach what Alex had planned for one single day.

“But don’t worry!” Alex added upon seeing the shocked look on Henry’s face, “it really sounds more than it actually is. You know that Raf and I will most likely chat more about Dad’s new campaign and the study group this afternoon is much more of a coffee date with friends than studying, I promise.”

“Love, you don’t have to justify yourself or any of your plans to me. I know how important all of this is to you and I know that you want to succeed, I know you will. But please, for the love of Christ, don’t run yourself dry before your finals week even starts. We all know how smart and amazing you are and you will do brilliantly in all of your exams but this can only happen if you are in a state to actually take this exams.”

Alex stared at him for a second before crashing his lips against Henry’s, kissing him within an inch of himself. Henry’s system was kickstarted into motion as he felt Alex’s hands cradling his neck and he kissed back, licking into Alex’s warm mouth. They kissed for several long moments, enjoying having the other close before Henry bit Alex’s lip softly, stopping him before they could lose themselves fully.

“You have lots of stuff to do and very little of it has kissing involved,” Henry mumbled against Alex’s lips. The other groaned loudly and rolled his head back.

“You’re right, again.”

Henry chuckled at the defeated tone in his voice hoping the guilt and sorrows were hidden from his lover’s eyes. “C’mon, love, time to get ready. You really don’t want to leave Mr Luna waiting, do you?”

Another groan. “No, of course not. What have you planned today? Anything exciting?” Alex asked while getting up from the bed slowly and starting to shuffle his books and stuff around to pack it up in his leather bag.

“Well, I was supposed to go to the shelter today because Pez wanted to pick out the decorations for the Halloween party but that plan obviously fell through. So now I’m probably just gonna take David out for a walk, get some groceries, and see if I can catch Bea for a call,” Henry trailed off hoping Alex was too distracted to notice his mood.

Of course he wasn’t that lucky. His boyfriend just knew him too bloody well.

“I mean why not use you day off and get some writing done? I’m ready to read that manuscript soon baby,” Alex laughed while getting out something to wear.

Henry swallowed. Don’t alarm him. “Yeah, sure -“

Before he could say anything else, Alex looked at his phone and cursed loudly. “Shit. How is it so late already, right, right, right shower.”

Without another word the curly-haired man rushed into the en-suite and jumped into the shower, their conversation already forgotten. Sometimes Henry was glad for the jumbled mess his boyfriend’s mind was.

He pulled himself out of bed as well, grabbed his fluffy peach coloured robe to fight off the autumn chill and went downstairs to feed David. The beagle was already waiting at his bowl and whined softly when he noticed Henry.

“Sorry, munchkin. I know it’s late today. You’ll get an extra hour in the dog park, now how does that sound?”

After filling David’s bowl, he started to make Alex some coffee and fix himself a strong cup of tea. English Breakfast it was today.

A few moments later, a whirlwind of Texas sun, wet curls, and profanities entered the kitchen and came to a stop in front of Henry.

“Bab-“

“Here.” Henry offered him the to-go cup with the little bee kind, bee beautiful, bee proud sticker in the colours of the bi-flag that he got Alex for his first day of uni.

“Sweetheart, my fucking life saver. I love you so much, God. I gotta run but how about dinner tonight? I’m feeling pasta and I want you to open up that wine June brought from their trip to Montreal, yeah? Let’s make it a date?” He panted while putting on his shoes and balancing the coffee on top of his laptop bag.

Henry chuckled lightly. “Sounds good, I’ll get the stuff we need. Text me when you’re done at the library and I’ll get the food ready. I have a new recipe I wanna try.”

“Ace! Can’t wait, see you later. Bye, love you,” he rushed out before pressing a quick kiss to Henry’s lips before bending down to David and kissing his little head, “see you tonight, pumpkin, love you!”

“Yeah, yeah we love you too. Go.” Henry laughed and pushing him towards the front door where he could make out Cash and another PPO called Zac talking to each other.

“Take Cash with you please, your mum’s congress speech is tomorrow and I’m antsy,” Henry added and made Alex stop in his tracks.

“Wait, what?” Oh bugger.

“Nothing, I’ll text Cash to give you the info. But I promise you didn’t miss anything important I just want to know he’s with you.”

“Yeah, good. Okay. See you, baby.”

“See you tonight. Love you,” Henry answered but Alex was already rushing down the stairs, Cash following him without a fuss.

Henry closed the front door after nodding at Zac in greeting and walked back into the open living room. Whenever Alex left, the space felt too big and too quiet for Henry’s liking. He loved the house he had picked and what they had started to make of it but even though it was a joined effort to pick out the furniture, it was still mostly Henry in here. And he desperately wanted it to be AlexandHenry but Alex was still living in a small flat downtown, closer to uni. It felt like the sensible decision after they were outed like that and Henry had to deal with the backlash of the Crown while the British population got another stark reminder of the huge web of lies the monarchy is built on. He had to learn how to be his true self in plain daylight before he could offer Alex his all. They first had to learn how to date properly before they could live together. Five months after moving in, Henry thought it was stupid.

He didn’t want just dating, he wanted waking up together in the morning, cooking dinner together at night, watching silly romcoms and reality shows, buying art for their walls, and picking out which family picture goes in which frame. He wanted their couch cushions to absorb the lovely leather and cinnamon scent that Alex carried around wherever he he went and a joined planner on their kitchen walls. He didn’t want a brownstone; he wanted a family home. Ultimately, he wanted two matching rings on their left hands and the pitter-patter sound of tiny feet over the hardwood floors. Henry wanted so much it scared him sometimes.

After learning how to share is internalised fears and anxieties and getting slowly - very slowly - better at communication, he now knew Alex’s own wishes weren’t all that different but the urge to do good and to help people with his law degree was too important and too big to just pass up, so Henry was more than happy to take a step back and let Alex do his thing first. He was waiting at home with open arms, love, and support because the world deserved to see the bright and burning force of Alexander Claremont-Diaz. Henry wouldn’t deny the world to see and feel Alex’s brilliance, he wasn’t that selfish. He had Alex to himself most of the time, he could share him from time to time.

Still, he was a selfish bastard when it came to Alex and he craved more and more. Always more. And he felt it more and more now that Alex was gone more often than not, always busy, always running around. Henry was feeling the size of the house more and more. And all this unoccupied room left an eternity of space for his thoughts, worries, and the darkness to creep in. He tried to occupy his mind with the shelters and the youth foundation and it worked to a certain extent but his heart was set on his book, something he had been working on for months at this point and at first the words came easy. The moment he had crossed the American boarder for good and felt his grandmother’s grip loosen its strength, his thoughts were overflowing with ideas, motivation, and excitement.

As the months flew by in a flurry of moving, decorating, and dating, he lost his focus, however, and now the space was turning into a semblance of loneliness and he didn’t know how to get back to his work.

Back in time, when life was simpler, he would find his dad in the evening after a long day of him being brilliant on set and Arthur would immediately know when something was troubling the younger Henry’s mind. His dad would sit him down and listen to him and his ideas that got stuck somewhere and he wasn’t able to make his stories work to a point where he couldn’t help himself but ball his tiny fists in annoyance and let frustrated tears fill his eyes. But his dad always had the right words, the soft voice, and the familiar warmth that helped Henry detangle his thoughts and bring him back on the right track. His dad was the bright light in the darkness that guided Henry through his life.

Until he was gone.

The young prince had thrived off of his father’s light and without it he thought he would be lost forever but Orion’s million little stars were the smallest relief to Henry’s broken heart. With every year Orion’s importance in Henry’s life grew and he felt like his dad was still guiding him from wherever he was.

Soon he was thriving off of Orion’s light.

Until he met a light brighter, more brilliant and beautiful, stronger, warmer, and more soothing than anything he had ever felt. Alex.

Soon Orion’s guidance was supported by Alex’s love and fierce protection and Henry knew he had found his home. He thrived off of Alex’s light and his dad was there with him whenever he was looking for Orion.

Henry let himself fall into the net of love and protection and didn’t realise that things were changing. Alex’s light was needed somewhere else. Orion’s light was hidden by the big city. His dad was further away than he was in years. And Henry was lost again.

But he couldn’t let Alex know about his stupid, selfish, and embarrassing problems because his light was needed somewhere else. Because he needed to focus on his dream so his light could help other people just like it helped Henry. He couldn’t be the reason Alex’s light was unavailable for others. Or worse, dimmed. 

But with Alex being needed somewhere else and the absence of Orion’s - his dad’s - guidance it became increasingly difficult to organise his mind and stay on track.

Henry desperately wanted to fill the growing emptiness inside himself with words, stories, and love to give Alex the space to grow, blossom, and succeed. He could never live with himself knowing he disrupted Alex’s dreams and hindered him from being the best version of himself, no.

He had to work through this patch himself. He did it before. Back in Kensington, when his mum was gone and his dad gone so much further, when Philip was completely brainwashed by their grandmother, and Bea was fighting her own demons. And he knew he could do it again.

Somehow.

Chapter Text

Alex

Two weeks later

Alex rubbed a harsh hand over his face and groaned quietly to himself. It’s been another long day of sitting in the library, studying for what felt like literal years, while coordinating his last group projects and study groups before finals would start in two weeks. But it’s been an even longer day of missing Henry. Alex couldn’t even remember the last time he had been able to enjoy an evening with his boy, much less a whole day and night.

Thing was Alex loved his life. He loved their life. After the ups and downs of the past year, the brunette man was more than than ready to settle down into a routine, into a simpler life, into a life that was not ruled by two bloody countries, and essentially into each other but of course life had other plans.

After Alex had made the split decision to turn away from his path into political power, he took his LSATs and enrolled in NYU law while Henry was…hiding in his tower. However, he hadn’t thought he had a real chance at ever getting in. Theoretically, Alex knew he was smart and capable of standing his ground in an argument. (For real, his speech after storming Kensington would have stunned any court in the world into silence.)

But he didn’t know whether he was good enough. His mind often told him he wasn’t which, honestly, was quite the problem but his family and especially his parents always had other problems to solve, new elections to win, and fights to fight to ever realize the doubts that was cementing in Alex’s mind. Ever since his childhood he had to fight these thoughts alone. And yes, that made him stronger and more stubborn – sure – but sometimes it would be nice to not be strong and stubborn on his own.

When Henry came along, for a second, he had the strength and support from someone to fall into and Henry made sure Alex understood that he was in fact good enough and the younger man slowly started to believe his lover. He started to understand that his mind was sometimes playing tricks on him and that he was indeed smart and good and enough. For a second, he believed he could achieve anything he wanted. But then Henry vanished into the night and left Alex wondering what had happened. His doubts came creeping back and he desperately wanted to prove to himself, to Henry, and to anyone else that he could do it on his own. So, he went and took the LSATs.

And, miraculously, he got in. And even more miraculously, Henry came back to him. (Or rather, Alex went and told his obtuse fucking asshole to fucking have him and he listened, thankfully.)

Henry, after he had a whole ass breakdown over Alex going through this process all alone, made sure Alex understood he was indeed good enough. “See. You made it. This was all you. And I’m so so proud of you, my darling. Look at you, making my life already so good. And now you’re going to make so many other people’s lives infinitely better. You are everything.”

Anyways, he was losing track of his thoughts.

Where was he?

Oh right. Their lives changing drastically.

So, after Henry had made the move to the states and was finally in Alex’s time zone for more than just three hours on end, and Alex had been accepted into the law programme at NYU and transferred from poli sci, they had to find their footing not only with the press and the whole world breathing down their necks but also with each other.

Essentially, neither of them knew how to be a couple. So far, all they had were rushed meetings that were more about getting each other naked than learning how to navigate a relationship. Mostly because neither of them even entertained any thoughts of having the other in this capacity.

But again, life had other plans and Alex would never ever change them for anything else. Because he finally had Henry. And Henry had him. And it was good. It’s been months at this point but sometimes Alex still stopped in his tracks and just admired the fact that Henry really was his boyfriend now. Holy shit.

And despite their infatuation with each other, or as Nora would call it obsession, Alex and Henry at least still had an ounce of reason within themselves and they made a very grown-up decision here if Alex said so himself. Even if Henry didn’t really see it as a necessary at the beginning, Alex had a very lengthy talk with his Dad, who is a pro in failed relationships, and Oscar made Alex realize that it was crucial to love Henry but also give him space to himself. Something he never had in his gilded cage that was Kensington Palace. And even less with the name Mountchristen-Windsor bearing down on Henry’s shoulders and hindering him from blossoming freely and beautifully.

So, in order to grant Henry the space to get reacquainted with himself, discover himself, and ultimately learn to be Henry Fox instead of Prince Henry, they had decided it was important for Henry to spend the first few months in New York on his own. Alex was, of course, never more than a phone call away but he knew it was integral for their future that Henry learned how to not be a prince before he was fully giving himself to Alex. Henry deserved to be his own person for a bit even if Alex wanted nothing more than to make him his. All of him.

With this decision in mind, Alex had rented a small studio apartment close to campus for the time being, thinking it would offer him the chance to get a bit of that freedom to really experience the whole student thing, something he was held back from by living in the White House for the first few years of his higher education.

And well, what can he say? In the beginning, this seemed like a smart idea and the best way for them to date each other for real while both of them adjusted to their new life.

Turns out, they were wrong. So wrong. At least when it came to what their hearts wanted.

Nowadays, it felt like the world’s most stupid idea. Mainly because living in separate apartments on two different sides of a bloody metropolis meant that you saw each other almost as little as when you lived an ocean apart.

And the thing was, Alex knew this was his fault to an extend because his schedule was cruel on the best of days. In the beginning, he managed fine with juggling his lectures, seminars, and various study groups while also making sure the two of them spent enough time with each other. (But who is he kidding? There is never enough time with Henry to satisfy Alex. Or vice versa.)

In the past few weeks though, ever since his finals started to get closer, Alex’s stress levels rose while his free time slipped away into nothingness. He would never willingly study in bed when a beautiful boy was cuddled up on his chest, snuffling cutely, and keeping his body warm. But then again, he could never willingly miss out on cuddles with Henry either. Not now that he finally had him in the same city, on the same continent, in the same time zone, on the tips of his fingers. They had missed out on so much in the first months of their relationship, when Henry still forced himself to believe that Alex could never love him back, when Alex was trying to make Henry understand that he really did.

Now that they were secure in their relationship and settled right into it, now that Henry seemed to understand he was allowed to fall into Alex whenever he wanted or needed to, and Henry taught him that Alex didn’t need to be strong all the time, that he was allowed to be soft and delicate whenever he need to let go, Alex needed him as close as possible. Not only to make up for lost time but also for his own goddamn sanity.

Lately, this had become increasingly difficult, due to Alex’s less than ideal schedule. So, Alex had to make some sacrifices. And if it meant missing out on sleep to study or call off another study group to stay close to his baby, so be it. Alex was dealing fine. He got this. At least he had thought so. But something was wrong with Henry and it became increasingly obvious to the younger man.

It all had begun about a month ago when Alex noticed that his boyfriend was talking less and less about his work which he usually was so passionate about. His daily summaries of what happened at the shelter remained but had gotten shorter and more to the point even if Alex tried to deepen the conversation. But what concerned Alex even more was the fact that Henry stopped talking about his manuscript – the thing that had been his lifeline for years now and what he had finally been able to give his full attention to once he moved to New York. Over the summer, when he was just settling into the brownstone and discussed wall paints with Oscar and looked for the right living room rug with June that would fit their dark blue velvet sofa perfectly, Henry had been up at all times, sitting at his desk in their office on the second floor that overlooked the backyard and typed his little heart away.

And his boy was glowing with happiness and the excitement of doing something that made him genuinely proud of himself. Something that was just for himself. Something that would not be tied to the name Mountchristen-Windsor. No, this would only belong to Henry Fox and no one else. And Alex loved watching him bloom and prosper and finally be the person he always wanted to be while adding his voice to the long list of people who had talked about the history of their community and it was genuinely good. Until it wasn’t.

Alex wished he had noticed it sooner but with his studies, their current living situation, and his ever-growing pile of work, the brunette man hadn’t seen the signs. Oh, he wished he had seen the signs. Because one day a week ago he was slammed with the realisation that Henry was not fine. That something was off. That his blooming flower was retracting himself from the light, withdrawing slowly from what made him happy, proud, and alive. And Alex had sworn to himself he would do his best to never let this happen again.

Of course, Henry’s dark days hadn’t miraculously vanished after he moved to America, but they had become significantly less in number with the freedom he had finally gained and the love and support of a family he had found after having been neglected for years.

And no, this was not Henry’s depression weighing him down or his mind telling him lies and playing tricks on him. That, Alex could deal with. After Alex had learned that Henry’s brilliant, brilliant mind sometimes turned against him and hurt him in a way no one else could, he had done everything in his power to figure out how to help his love. He had learned how to support him, take care of him, hold him together when Henry couldn’t do it himself. He had found a way to love him right. Because it was true what he had said to Bea all those months ago: Alex loved Henry on purpose. It was not some silly infatuation that went away after he had gotten a piece of the beautiful blonde man, no, it was the real deal back then and it had grown to be so much more now. He loved Henry with all that, becauseof all that, and it would never change.

But this was something else. Whatever this was. Where his dark days left Henry withdrawn and with the air of hopelessness, the fear of being a burden, and his mind telling him he wasn’t good enough, that he was too much, and not someone that deserved to be loved, this was something inherently different. To Alex it felt as Henry was locking himself away. Putting up walls around him to hide something beneath them, something he didn’t want Alex – or anyone for that matter – to find out.

Not only did he stop talking about his work and his writing, but Alex also noticed the few times he had managed to stay over that his boyfriend had seemingly returned to old habits and started to sleep less and less. It was safe to say, Henry’s behaviour worried him and Alex hated that his schedule had prevented him from noticing the state his boy was in earlier.

Just a few days ago, Henry had been crying in the garden in the middle of the night and instead of talking to Alex, confiding in him and sharing his sorrows, he had tried to hide his tears. But even the muted moonlight and the darkness of their backyard couldn’t conceal the wet streaks that were highlighting the dark circles under his eyes, no matter how quickly and discrete Henry had wiped them away.

“But why?” Alex mumbled to himself, his voice shot after hours of not using it but still ringing through the quiet air of the study room he had occupied in the library.

He had subtly tried to coax anything out of Henry but instead of opening up, the other had changed the direction of their conversation, or stopped their conversations with something decidedly different every single time for the past few weeks. And Alex was getting more and more worried. Because after their first few months together and Henry learning that he was indeed loved by Alex, the older boy had started to work on his communication skills and Alex had done his best to show him that he could always come to him with everything that was on his mind. Lately, this hadn’t happened anymore.

And Alex was starting to lose his mind. Not only over his impending finals but also over what was going on with the love of his fucking life. He knew he had been pretty much working himself raw the past few weeks but he still had shown Henry that he was his number one priority, right?

He cursed under his breathe before throwing his stuff into his leather messenger bag and storming out of the study room, making his way out of the library into the setting afternoon sun. He glanced around, quickly realising it was indeed almost dark, the early winter evenings really fucking with his head. When he pulled his phone out and he saw the time his breath stocked for a second. How the fuck was it already close to 5??? His last lecture ended at 10 this morning and he went to the library right after…he had been completely immersed in his work for almost seven hours?? When did this happen, bloody Christ.

He turned off Do not Disturb and watched the messages popping up in a steady stream. There are several from June and Nora in their group chat talking about their Sunday brunch date, one from Bea to check in, a few random emojis from Pez, and a link to a recipe from his father. And only one simple love you ♥︎ from Henry. Nothing else. No questions of when Alex will be home, if he might join him for dinner, if he could go to the shops and buy some milk because they ran out this morning or that he couldn’t wait to see him.

Alex felt dread settle in his stomach like a hot, heavy stone.

He swiped away the messages and opened up his contacts, pressing on irl chaos demon and putting the phone to his ear while starting to make his way to the subway station. (He knew he was supposed to let Cash know when he was done for the day to pick him up but he was stressed and needed to move, so sue him. No one would attack him in the middle of the day.)

He fiddled with the strap of his bag impatiently, waiting for the call to connect. Just on the last ring, it was finally picked up and Alex didn’t leave room for any greetings.

“Is Henry mad at me?”

“Hello to you too, Alejandro, it’s nice to hear from you. I’m doing good, thanks for asking.” Nora’s flat answer came through the receiver in a dry voice.

Alex sighed and pinched his nose with his free hand. “Yes, hi Nora. Glad you’re doing well, I’m alright, can we now come back to my problem?” He whined into the receiver.

He could make out an answering sigh on the other side of the call and a muffled, “it’s Alex, no don’t worry babe, he’s just being Alex.”

“Hey!” Alex complained, “I am having a real crisis here! Stop making fun of me!”

“Well, what’s that supposed crisis about then?” Nora relented.

“Henry only texted me he loved me today,” he whined.

“Is he serious?” He could hear June in the background, surely rolling his eyes at him.

“I repeat, stop making fun of me,” he said, this time more serious and Nora seemed to notice he was not just being dramatic for the hell of it.

“Alright, what’s this really about?”

“I don’t know that’s why I need your help!”

“Maybe start at the beginning then? Why on earth do you think Henry is mad at you because he only texted you that he loves you? ‘m sorry, babes, but this doesn’t make a lot of sense to me and I’m me.”

“I know how this sounds but look, he has been acting weird the lately and usually he reaches out to me throughout the day even when I’m in my study bubble, but he still fills my phone with random texts, thoughts he had, things David did, or stuff he wants to remind me of. Just him texting once and nothing else is so strange and I’m getting real concerned over here,” he rambled while getting closer to the entrance to the subway. He checked his watch and saw that it was already close to 6 at this point and he hoped he could make it to the brownstone in less than 40 minutes with how busy the city was at this hour of the day.

“Maybe he was busy himself? Didn’t Pez say there were prepping for some sort of event with this ace author who offered to do a reading of her newly published YA novel? You know how he gets when he’s focusing on something that is important to him, he puts his whole heart in it and maybe the day just got away from him, same as it always does for you.” Nora said in a soothing tone.

“Oh damn, I forgot about that,” Alex mumbled, quietly chastising himself for not remembering something that was arguably really important to his boyfriend. “Is he mad about that? Has he said anything to you? Please Nora, help a guy out here?”

“Alex, breathe, of course he’s not mad at you? And no, I’m not just saying this for the sake of it. Even if he did not say anything to me, I know he is not mad at you. Henry just knows how much you currently have on your mind, and knowing him, he just decided to take a step back and let you do your thing so you can ace your finals and not stress about anything else. I promise you, your loyal little lap dog of a boyfriend would not get angry at you for not remembering something this small. I haven’t talked to him today either, so I bet he really is just busy. But I’m sure, he’d be more than happy to be able to fall asleep in your arms tonight, so why don’t you stop stressing over what ifs and get your pretty little ass to Brooklyn, so he can show you how much he loves you,” Nora chuckled.

“Nora, what did we say about talking about my baby brother’s sex life?” An outraged screech from June interrupted Nora’s monologue.

Alex laughed despite himself and took a deep breath, no point in panicking now. “Yeah, I’m on my way to him now. I just hoped he might have said something to you. He’s not been quite himself lately, and I’m worried about him.”

“No, babes. He hasn’t said anything to me. He seemed a bit more quiet than usual when we met for coffee on Tuesday but when I asked he just said he was feeling a bit under the weather. Maybe he’s just stressed about work but doesn’t want to bother anyone, you know how he gets. But let me know if he’s acting weird for the next few days and I’ll make sure to corner his skinny white ass and make him spill what’s going on. Promise,” his best friend answered with a seriousness to her voice. (Sometimes Alex really envied how close Henry and Nora had become over the past few months, other times, like now, he was fucking glad, Henry had another person to pull him out of his head and tell him to stop trying to work through his pain alone and share it from time to time. When Alex told him in an email to give himself away sometimes he hadn’t yet known Henry would get the chance to do it with a newly found family but, damn, it was fucking nice to know Alex’s family stepped up.)

“Babe, I love you but your obsession with my brother and his boyfriend’s behinds is slightly disturbing,” June cried in the back.

“Well, what can I say? They’re nice asses,” Nora drawled making June groan out loud.

“I would agree with that,” Alex mused, feeling slightly better after having Nora confirm that Henry was fine just as he was arriving at the entrance to the subway. “Right, I’m about to lose signal but thank you for telling me that. As soon as I’m done with these goddamn finals I will take him somewhere nice for a few days so he can relax. Pez won’t mind if I steal him for a bit, right? Maybe a change of scenery and some other weather will do him good.”

“Sounds like a great plan, Alejandro. Give the boy some inspo for his book and yourself a lil break,” Nora agreed with a snicker and Alex rolled his eyes fondly.

“Alright, I’m hanging up now, weirdo. Love you. Also, tell June I love her, bye!”

“We love you too, bye.” And with that the line went dead.

He pulled his phone away from his ear and felt lighter than he had all day. The lingering stress from his impending finals was still looming in the back of his mind but the thought of seeing his boy soon was making the stress take a backseat.

Before walking down to the subway, Alex switched to his text chain with Henry and typed a quick message.

Alex (6:07pm)

just about to hop on the subway

gonna be home in like 30 🌚

cant wait to see you !!

love you, too 💕

With that he rushed down the stairs to catch the next train, put in his headphones in, and opened Spotify to the Taylor Swift playlist Henry and June had curated for him to prepare for the concert he was being dragged to next year. (Don’t tell these two menaces that he started to really enjoy her music – especially Red and 1989 were really speaking to him, so he might cry thinking of seeing her live, sue him.)

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

Half an hour later, Alex arrived at the brownstone and nodded his head at the secret service agent standing guard in the entry way that separated their living space and the apartment in the basement in which Henry’s PPOs and the secret service agents from the White House took residency.

There wasn’t any light coming from within their apartment which had Alex stop in his tracks. He turned back to the agent, what was his name? Jake? Jeremy? John? Christ, Alex really needed these finals to be over.

“Is Henry in?” He asked with a small frown on his face.

The agent nodded his head once, “yeah, His Royal Highness has spent the day at home, he only left to take your dog for a walk at about 3:30pm, sir,” he answered without a single ounce of emotion in his voice. Yeah, Alex didn’t particularly like this guy, maybe that’s why he never learned his name and it wasn’t the stress after all.

He was about to thank the agent for the information when he registered what he had actually said. Henry had been home all day? He hadn’t been at the shelter? But Nora said he and Pez needed to prepare that event she mentioned…the hot ball of dread in his stomach was lighting itself up once again.

“Thank you for letting me know,” Alex said absentmindedly, “you can take the rest of the night off. I’ll stay here and Cash will take over shortly. Please let the PPO on call know that Henry won’t be alone tonight.”

“Noted, sir. Good night.”

“Have a good one,” he said while already rushing through the door into the dark hallway behind their apartment door.

The brunette man locked the door as he put down his messenger bag and took off his shoes before walking further into their downstairs living space. Everything was completely dark. Not a sound to be heard. Not even David’s claws clacking on the dark hardwood floors. If Alex didn’t know better, he would swear that the house was empty.

“Hen?” He called into the eerie quietness but no answer could be heard. Well, if this isn’t concerning.

Alex wandered through the open living space into the beautiful white kitchen, Henry had painted with June and Ellen, after his mum and sister decided they needed some bonding time with their future in law. The younger man smiled softly at the surprise in Henry’s eyes when Alex’s mother – the literal president of the United States of America – stood in his kitchen at 9 o’clock on a Saturday morning telling him to get his pasty butt into some overalls because this kitchen needed some light. Even more surprising to his boy was that a mom was actually acting like one and helped her family with simple things such as life. Alex knew that Henry had charmed Ellen right from the beginning but watching her take him under his wing and deciding that, yes, this British boy fits perfectly into my Texan family and I will treat him as my own, was the day Alex realized they made it. (Watching June do the same making Henry understand that he now had two big sisters who loved and supported him but also kicked his ass if necessary was also quite a beautiful thing to witness.)

Anyway, his mind was all over the place and he probably needed like 12 hours of sleep instead of the six cups of coffee he had today but that was neither here nor there.

His path brought him to the small backyard door next to the kitchen, thinking that Henry might be outside with David. But when he tried the handle it was locked.

Strange. Where was Henry?

Alex turned around and left the kitchen for the staircase that would bring him up to the second and third floor of the brownstone. He was contemplating whether Henry was already in bed but when the younger man stepped on the second-floor landing, he could make out the softest noise from the office. He furrowed his brows because there wasn’t any light coming from the room but when he stepped closer and pushed the door open, his heart seized in his chest.

There in the middle of the room on the thick cream coloured carpet, that covered most of the wooden floor, was Henry surrounded by pillows and blankets, wearing one of his old cardigans and staring at his notebook. The blonde man was laying on his stomach, feet in the air, with David curled up against his left hip. Several books, notepads, random sheets of paper, and a dictionary were surrounding Alex’s beloved boys. Neither of them noticed Alex standing in the doorway and any other time he would be offended if the soft light from the fairy lights and various candles wouldn’t show that David was sleeping deeply and Henry must have been listening to music given the headphones that were sitting on his head. The blonde man was scribbling furiously into his notebook, the pressure of his pen so hard it almost ripped the thick paper apart.

Alex watched him for a few moments, noticing the furrowed brows and tense set of shoulders. This was obviously not just a little writing fun. No, this was something that weighed heavily on his boyfriend’s shoulders. Was this what has been bothering Henry lately?

Obviously, Alex wasn’t the only one who needed to relax. A burst of energy filled his body as he turned around and walked back down to the kitchen, mind set on making his boy smile. Some good, comforting food would make Henry’s frown smooth out, and a little wine would loosen up those harsh-edged shoulders.

After looking into their pantry and opening different cupboards and the fridge, the younger man was assessing his options, trying to decide what would be the best meal for that night. In the end, he settled on spaghetti with meatballs and a homemade marinara sauce, knowing his boy was secretly very fond of Italian cuisine. (Especially since that one long weekend, Alex had taken him on a surprise trip to Venice and they tried really hard to enjoy the beauty of the city but ended up enjoying each other’s beauty so much more. Also, eating spaghetti butt naked in the middle of the night on their private balcony, changed their relationship to Italian food fundamentally.)

He put on some music over the Bluetooth speaker and got to work, quietly singing along to some Mexican band he and Pez had found a few weeks back when they had met up because Henry was busy with Nora and June, doing one of their “girls’ nights” to which neither of them had access. Ever since Nora and June had taken Henry into their girls’ group, Pez and Alex had decided to not spend these nights moping and alone but meet up, make dinner, and get obnoxiously drunk. And well, Alex loved it. Pez had quickly become one of his most favourite people in the world and to have created such a bond with the person that single-handedly loved and protected Henry for years was incredibly important to him.

Soon, the living space was filled with the hearty, comforting notes of the meatballs and the bubbling tomato sauce, making the kitchen feel even homier and Alex felt himself relax at the slow work and the knowledge that he was making something to enjoy with his boy.

Alex was just about to put the spaghetti into the boiling water, when two strong, pale arms circled his waist and pulled him into an equally strong chest. Henry leaned down and nuzzled his face into Alex’s neck, leaving a soft kiss there and making Alex close his eyes with a soft sigh. Oh, how he needed this easy intimacy. He could feel his stressed muscles finally losing the tension that has been living there for the past few days. Ever since he last saw Henry really. God, how he loved when Henry’s larger body completely encompassed him and shielded him from the world. Nothing could hurt him like that.

The quiet moment was broken when the boiling water suddenly started to bubble over and a soft shriek left Alex’s mouth as it hit his hand that was still hovering over the pot.

“Careful, darling,” Henry mumbled before turning Alex in his arms and brought some space between them and the oven, pulling the smaller man into his chest once more, “can’t cause any damage to those beautiful hands now, can we?” The other continued while cradling Alex’s hand in his and kissed the tender spot where the water had landed. Alex closed his eyes and swayed closer to his boyfriend, only now realizing how much he had missed Henry, his voice, and his touch.

“Well, I have you to kiss it all better, so I’m good. Splendid coincidence that I am here, isn’t it?” Alex murmured with a raised eyebrow, a smirk quirking up the corner of his mouth.

Henry rolled his eyes fondly and pressed another, longer kiss to Alex’s hand before he let his mouth travel up up up. A small kiss to his wrist, another pressed to the sharp edge of his elbow, and a series of little pecks over his shoulder to Henry’s favourite spot to hide, Alex’s neck. With a little nip there, Henry’s mouth travelled further up the brunette’s neck and Alex felt his knees were about to give up on him. A soft yet electric flutter was erasing the heavy stone of stress and worry in his stomach and Alex tilted his head to the other side, giving Henry more access to his skin. When Henry got to the edge of Alex’s jaw, he stopped for a second before biting down gently eliciting a small moan out of the smaller man. Again, he didn’t linger for long, instead moving up and finally finding Alex’s waiting lips, pressing his own incredibly soft ones against them in a gentle yet deep kiss.

Alex’s eyes fluttered closed as he leaned into the embrace and kissed his boy back, a soft sigh escaping his lips when he felt himself relax for the first time in at least four days.

The kiss was unhurried and soft, just a trade of love and affection, to show the other that you are there. To Alex, it felt like coming home. And, oh how he had missed this.

Every sense of time had left the brunette boy’s body, his mind blissfully quiet in Henry’s arms when a sudden whine from David pulled him back to the present. Alex opened his eyes and looked up into Henry’s blue ones, his blond brows furrowed and questioning. Suddenly, Alex registered the burned smell coming from behind him as he swiftly turned around and watched as the carefully prepared meatballs have practically turned to ash.

“Oh, dios mío! Fuck, fuck, fuck” Alex cursed and rushed over to the stove, taking the pan away and turning off the heat. With an angry huff, Alex pushed the pan into the kitchen sink, the stone back in his stomach. “Well, looks like we won’t be eating these anymore,” Alex sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat, his plan to surprise Henry dissolving into thin air, “I’m sorry, baby.”

Henry chuckled lightly and moved behind Alex’s back. “Oh, I can see that.” Alex turned around again, throwing him an angry look which made something small flit over Henry’s face but was a second later replaced by another laugh. Huh? Before Alex could investigate this further, his boyfriend continued, “what are you doing here anyway?”

Alex gave him a look. “What do you mean, what am I doing here? What does this look like to you? Knitting?”

Henry licked his lip, obviously trying to supress a smile in the eye of Alex’s frustration but he was failing miserably. “Didn’t know you could knit spaghetti,” he teased.

“The day you found your humor, was the day I found hell,” Alex sighed, his own little smile threatening to break through. This little fucker always knew how to pull him out of his head before he even moved an inch.

As he pulled Alex back into his arms, the blonde man was laughing softly, pressing his mouth to the side of Alex’s head leaving another small kiss in its wake.

“Shhh. You and I both know that’s a lie,” Henry whispered into his messy curls, rubbing his back softly with a gentle hand. “But really, what are you doing here? Last we spoke yesterday, you told me you would be staying in your flat for the week because you had too many back to back meetings along with your normal courses and the commute from Brooklyn would take too long. And, I hate to break it to you but this is Brooklyn, dearest.”

Alex rolled his eyes. “Haha, really funny. I’m not senile. You are one to talk, old man. I have yet to reach your age,” he huffed while starting to play with a button of Henry’s cardigan. The thing was, Henry was right. He had said that he wouldn’t have time to make the whole journey to Brooklyn and back for a few days because his days have been packed to the brim and he sometimes didn’t even know whether he could make time to fucking breathe. But. But along with being worried about Henry and the need to check up on him, he also needed to see his love. He needed the ocean blue eyes that twinkled with love and adoration, he needed the soothing touch of gentle fingertips that were just slightly rough from years of playing the piano, he needed the scent of clean linen and freshly cut grass that soothed the frantic beat of his heart, he needed the embrace of strong arms that made the world for once just quiet. And he had longed for this, especially the past few days. So, all of this combined had led him to go homeinstead of his flat in the city.

“Alex? Are you alright, darling?” Henry asked with the air of worry surrounding him after Alex must have missed what he had said to him.

“Yeah, of course. Just tired. It’s been a long day,” Alex replied, looking up into soft baby blues, “and before you can say anything. I know. I could be asleep by now if I had stayed in the city but I wanted to surprise you.”

Henry looked at him for a moment without saying anything before a swallowed and a small smile appeared on his gorgeous face. “Well, it is a nice surprise. Of course it is. I thought I had to go back to writing risqué emails and staring longingly out of the window instead of holding you in my arms.” He mused, tapping his finger on his jaw.

“I repeat then, splendid coincidence that I am here, isn’t it?” Henry chuckled and hummed in agreement.

“So, what were you making that almost burned my house down?” Henry asked and looked over to the stove.

Alex gasped mock affronted and hit the other’s chest softly. “Hey! Who came in here and assaulted me with kisses that had me losing all sense of time and place? This is your fault, mister! I wanted to make sure you had a tummy full of good food and now we can eat plain spaghetti. Unbelievable!”

Henry giggled at Alex’s outraged tone and walked over to sauce that was still bubbling on the stove. He took a spoon and tried some of it, a pleased smile on his face when the tangy sweet flavour of tomato hit his tongue. “The sauce is still very much fine, love. We can just have the pasta without the meatballs, I am more than fine with it. Thank you for coming all this way to feed me even though you have much more important things to do,” he said with sigh.

“My absolute pleasure. I know you and I know you probably had lived off of peanut butter and jelly toast and three gallons of tea for the past three days because America has ruined your taste buds even more than merry old England ever could,” Alex huffed while stepping over to the pot with water that had burned him earlier and started to cook the spaghetti.

“I won’t deny or admit to anything,” Henry shrugged but the small blush on his cheeks told Alex everything he needed to know.

“Christ, the US has ruined you.”

“Yeah, and the First Son was a great role model for it,” the other winked making Alex swallow an embarrassing moan.

“He sure did. Now let me get this finished so I can do my American duty and ruin you some more.” Henry’s answering moan made him giggle into the bubbling marinara sauce.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

After dinner, Henry offered to do the dishes while Alex took a quick shower to get the stale library smell off himself. He made quick work of cleaning himself and only threw on some sweat shorts and a shirt that Henry left on the loveseat in the corner of the bedroom, hoping their night would end on a much sweeter and decidedly less clothed note than the past few days had.

When he came back down to their living space, he found Henry still standing at the kitchen island where the sink was, although he seemed to be done with the dishes. His boyfriend was gripping the marble countertop tightly and even though he was facing the living room, he hadn’t noticed Alex yet. Henry’s eyes were closed and he had a greyish hue to his usually pale and soft complexion. The worry he had felt earlier was making its way back into Alex’s consciousness and he so badly wanted to take whatever was wearing down on his boy off of his shoulders. He had hoped that the surprise dinner and a few hours of just them would loosen the tense edges of Henry’s shoulders but there was something he was hiding from Alex, that much was clear. Alex just couldn’t figure out what the hell that was.

As much as he wished he could just march up there and demand an explanation he had come to learn that this was the safest way that Henry would clam up and stop talking entirely. In the months of being with Henry he had also learned that it was his best bet to just offer quiet support and let Henry come to him when he was ready to share. His boy had gotten better with communicating his feelings and sorrows but sometimes the old princely mask would move back into place and force him to hide his emotions to save the face of people who did not fucking deserve him or his loyalty.

Anyways right now was not the time to think about his beloved in-laws. He had much more important things to tend to.

Namely, his beautiful baby.

“You need help with that?” He asked softly letting Henry know he was back. The other opened his eyes quickly and rubbed a quick hand over his face as he tried to school it into something nonchalant but was failing miserably. Alex’s heart clenched painfully, a determination to take Henry’s mind off things growing in his mind.

“No, thank you, darling. I’m done. Was just getting some water going for a cuppa, it’s getting quite chilly at night now,” Henry answered with a small shrug.

“I know something far better to warm you up than a cup of tea,” Alex murmured, walking over to his boyfriend.

“Is that so?”

“Hmm, in fact it is.” The brunette man hummed before pulling him close with a gentle grip to his soft waist, kissing him with purpose.

Each time he got to kiss Henry, Alex believed this must be the last time the touch of their lips would take his breath away. Each time he was sure it would be the last one to stand out against the thousands of kisses they had shared before, blurring together in a haze of bitten lips, warm tongues, and gentle teeth. Each time he was proven wrong.

This one was no less memorable than each and every single one that Alex had locked in his memory. It was just as good as the small pecks Henry pressed onto his lips before one of them had to leave, or as the ones that were interrupted by giggles, their smiles so wide it didn’t even count as a real kiss, or as the hot lust-filled ones that were more teeth than anything else in the heat of the moment, or the desperate ones after they hadn’t seen each other in weeks, or as the reassuring ones, just to show that the other is here. No, this one was just as special and Alex locked it safely in his memory, where the others had found a home.

Alex was brought back to the present when Henry slid his long fingers into his curls with a small, desperate sound. He grinned against Henry’s lips as his own hands travelled over the width of Henry’s back to the hem of the old cardigan, his fingers tugging Henry’s shirt up and slipping under, stroking the warm skin just above the waistband of his worn joggers.

As his fingers were painting mindless patterns on Henry’s skin, Alex felt his boyfriend go pliant in his arms. After months of taking care of Henry, Alex knew this was a safe sign that he wanted to hand over the power, prying himself open for Alex to take what he wanted while trusting Alex to take care of him. Even without explicitly saying it, he knew that Henry wanted him to take the reins, to cover him entirely, to love him completely, to quiet his mind. And Alex was all too happy to comply.

When the need for air became too much, Alex’s mouth began to travel down the other’s jaw and found its favourite spot right below Henry’s left ear that always elicited the moist delicious and sweet sounds from his boy. At first, he just nibbled gently on the smooth skin until he could feel the goosebumps erupt all over Henry’s body and immediately started to suck hard. Henry’s low moan was replaced by a deep whimper, Henry’s body practically melting against Alex. With a secure hand around Henry’s waist and a supporting one beneath his bum, Alex hoisted Henry up and made his way over to the staircase.

“Think you can walk, baby?” He panted into Henry’s ear where the other was kissing messily along his jaw.

“Mh,” the blonde man hummed as Alex put him back down softly. Henry turned around, blindly grabbing for Alex’s hand, and dragging him up the stairs.

When they reached their bedroom, Alex pulled Henry back into his arms and kissed him soundly, eliciting another soft whine from his boy. He walked Henry backwards until his knees hit the edge of the bed, licking into his mouth once more before pushing him onto the mattress. Alex smiled down at him, a hand gently skimming through the soft blond strands he loved so much.

“All good, mi amor?” Alex asked and Henry’s blue eyes lit up with the term of endearment, one of his most beloved ones. Henry nodded and leaned back on the bed, steadying himself with his hands behind him. He cocked his head to the side and smiled sweetly at Alex, turning the hot passion from their kisses into something much softer, more safe and secure. We’re making love, a voice that sounded like Henry supplied helpfully in his brain.

Before Alex could say more, Henry spread his legs invitingly making space for the brunette man, to which he crowded close immediately. He threw his own shirt over his head and quickly slipped out of his shorts before he got his hands back on his boy, undressing him with quick, sure movements that had Henry moan in anticipation. As soon as both of them were naked, Alex moved onto the bed, hovering over Henry, blanketing him with his whole body. Henry’s answering groan was appreciative and needy as his legs came up to wrap around Alex’s waist.

With the push of Henry’s strong legs, their hard cocks moved against each other, making both men hiss brokenly.

“Fuck baby, I missed you,” Alex panted into Henry’s ear, grinding down harder. Henry’s hips thrusted up in a similar fashion, his tip already wet and leaking making the harsh thrusts so much smoother.

“Alex, please,” Henry whispered needily.

“What do you want, sweet angel?”

“I’m… please, your tongue?” Henry asked with wide eyes… and how could Alex deny him anything?

“Turn around for me. On your hands and knees,” he demanded softly, making the other mewl. Henry nodded eagerly and almost pushed Alex off himself. “Easy there, baby. We’re in no rush.” The younger boy chuckled fondly.

Just a moment later, Alex grabbed one of their fuzzy throw pillows and gently placed it underneath Henry’s hips in case he couldn’t hold himself any longer and positioned his own body behind, taking in the view in front of him with an eager moan of his own.

“Perfect,” he breathed as he softly grabbed Henry’s hips, letting his hands wander over the swell of his bum, making the other boy whine softly. “Are you ready, baby?”

Henry’s moan was answer enough for Alex to spread his cheeks apart and blow some air onto the fluttering hole. The moan turned into a high-pitched whimper as the cold air hit Henry’s most intimate spot. Alex smiled to himself. This version of Henry was one of his favourites. All for him. Just for him.

Without another warning, Alex pressed his lips to Henry’s flesh.

“Oh.” A whisper-soft gasp could be heard from above when Alex kissed around Henry’s entrance, getting him all slick and wet, preparing him for Alex’s tongue and fingers. Just the first touch of Alex’s tongue had his boy shaking on their bed, vibrating out of his skin with the anticipation of what was about to happen.

Alex started to work in earnest, the sounds from above spurring him on. His own sounds were positively obscene as he licked, sucked, and kissed at Henry’s sensitive skin like a starving man, having explored Henry’s body well enough by now to know exactly where he needed to reach to turn him into putty under his mouth. He sneaked a hand between his face and Henry’s ass, massaging behind his balls which sent a tremble all over his gorgeous body.

The longer he kept up his ministrations, the more Henry started trashing in the sheets. Alex knew Henry was getting close quickly, the need for release and an empty mind outweighing the wish to prolong this as much as possible.

On a particularly harsh tremble, Alex’s tongue finally breached the muscle and Henry stopped for a breathless second, his body still and tense before Alex fucked his tongue in and out deliberately, the movement bringing Henry back to reality.

“Oh, fuck fuck fuck,” the blonde man gasped, his hands desperately searching for something to hold onto. Alex complied happily and reached his hand out, taking Henry’s shaking one in his. The other immediately grasped onto it and held on tightly. “So good, my love. So, fucking good, don’t stop, please don’t stop, right there mh mh yes right there!” Henry panted brokenly.

Alex’s own hips had started to grind down on the mattress, desperately trying to relieve some of the pressure in his groin but to no avail. His body was taut like a bow, every muscle waiting for sweet, sweet release. But Henry needed to let go first. Which seemed to be any moment now.

Henry’s moans were getting louder as his hips started to move involuntarily, pressing against Alex’s face with a force that made him grin to himself. Henry loved this so much; he was positively losing his mind whenever Alex ate him out and Alex was living for it. This was exactly what he had wanted for tonight, for Henry to completely stop thinking and just enjoy.

Doubling his efforts earned him a loud high-pitched moan from his boy and Henry jerked so hard Alex felt like he was a second away from drowning. Not a bad way to go.

His own moans were getting harder to control and he ground down on the mattress hard, willing himself to keep level-headed.

“So close, darling, I’m so close, God fuck you are so good,” Henry whimpered his praise making a warm blush erupt on Alex’s cheeks. “I just need, I-“

Alex lifted his head for a second, taking a much needed breathe. “What do you need, sweetheart?”

“Finger, please.”

“Your wish is my command,” Alex replied and added two fingers at once before diving back in with his tongue. His fingers slid in without much resistance, Henry’s hole stretched and loose from Alex’s incessant tongue.

Henry cursed loudly and his hips jerked messily, aiming to find that sweet, sweet spot deep in himself. Alex snickered, purposefully avoiding his prostate to get a rise out of his boy.

“Alexander. You little shit.” Henry wheezed between laboured breaths. “C’mon.” With that Henry freed his hand from Alex’s grip and reached behind until it found Alex’s messy curls. He grabbed a few strands and pulled hard, making Alex see bloody stars. Alex stopped breathing for a second, the sharp pain delicious and welcomed.

“Bossy,” he whispered before thrusting his finger in once more, harder and deeper. The second he found Henry’s prostate, his boy went still for a breath of a moment before his own thrusts came back with more force than before.

Henry’s moans got louder and less controlled, his hips stuttering and the hand in Alex’s curls tightening. “I’m so close, Alex.”

“Let go, baby.” And with that Henry’s whole body tensed up one last time before he came with a soft, breathy laugh, making a mess of the pillow beneath him.

With a last kiss to Henry’s fluttering hole, Alex pulled himself back up and moved over Henry’s relaxed body, his boy still trying to catch his breath. He covered Henry, his own hard length pressing into the back of Henry’s thigh. He turned his head until he found Henry’s cheek, pressing a loving kiss there, his boy smiling exhausted.

“Let me return the favour,” Henry mumbled with a heavy tongue and even heavier eyes. He was a second away from passing out.

“It’s fine, mi amor. That was all about you. You’ll get your chance next time, I promise.” He whispered while nuzzling Henry’s shoulder gently.

“Fuck my thighs then,” Henry said airily making Alex choke on his breath. “Henry Fox. You cannot just say these things. Do you want me to have a heart attack?”

“No, just a nice orgasm,” he murmured.

“Dios mio,” Alex spluttered again. “Alright.” He grabbed the lube from the bedside table, adding to the wetness on Henry’s thighs. “This is gonna be a little cold, baby, ‘m sorry.”

A moment later, Henry’s hand found Alex’s thigh and he gently tapped it, spurring him on. He started to grind down, slow at first but his movements turned quick and desperate soon. The hot tension in his body lighting up once again. His hips jerked harshly making Henry’s body move along with him. Henry moaned weakly, his hand still a hot presence on his thigh. Alex’s own moans were getting louder, his thrusts uncontrollable and harder.

“Fuck, baby your thighs are a fucking sin. God, you feel incredible. Shit, I love you so much.” He panted into Henry’s ear. “I’m so close, Christ.”

Henry turned his head, offering his lips for a rough kiss despite the awkward angle. It was more teeth than anything. It was perfect.

“Come for me, my love. Mark me up. Show me I’m yours.” And with that Alex’s orgasm washed over him like a goddamn tidal wave, adding to the mess on Henry’s body.

When he came down from his high, he crashed right into Henry’s body, his own exhaustion hitting him out of nowhere. Right, he hadn’t properly slept in like a week.

“Fuck, sweetheart, that was perfect.” He said with another kiss to Henry’s overheated cheek.

“You are perfect, love you so much” Henry mumbled, now on the brink of sleep.

Alex’s heart seized in his chest. “I love you too, gorgeous. Go to sleep, baby. I’ll clean you up.”

With a soft hum, his boyfriend fell asleep. Alex smiled down at him and pressed another soft kiss into his sweaty hair before slowly getting up. He walked into the ensuite to get a washcloth to clean up the worst of the mess. He would hate it for Henry to finally get a good sleep and then wake up all dirty and disgusting.

After he quickly wiped Henry and himself down, he stumbled back over to their bed feeling the grasps of sleep taking a hold of him.

Henry had rolled himself into a small ball to fight off the chill in the now cooling room in the time it took Alex to clean himself up. As soon as he settled down, Henry subconsciously relaxed his body and made space for Alex to fit right behind him. The brunette man smiled softly while scooting closer and fitting his chest to Henry’s broad back. He put his arm around Henry’s waist and pulled him as close as possible into his body. A small content sigh escaped his boyfriend’s lips. His own stressed and hard muscles finally relaxing with the feel of Henry in front of him, his clean, grassy smell in his nose, and the soft sandy strands brushing against his face.

With a last kiss pressed into Henry’s hair, Alex finally passed out.

What felt like just minutes later, but must have been a few hours at least, Alex came back to consciousness because the chill in the room was making him tremble unpleasantly. He opened his eyes, expecting to see Henry’s sleeping form somewhere on his side of the bed since he wasn’t pressed to Alex anymore but was met with an empty mattress. In his half alert state, he pushed his arm out feeling for Henry’s warmth but there was no trace of to be found on the cold mattress. Henry hadn’t been there in quite some time.

The brunette boy lifted his head off his pillow and tried to focus his eyes, gaining sight in the darkness of their room. When he let his eyes wander through the moonlit room, he furrowed his brow because he couldn’t see Henry. The bathroom light was off too, meaning that he wasn’t in there either.

He sat up slowly, ready to get out of bed to look for his boyfriend when his eyes landed on the bay window on the other side of the room. There, on the cushioned bench that was built into the alcove and which both loved dearly, Henry was curled up into a small ball, his head turned towards the window.

Alex’s brows furrowed in confusion, trying to figure out whether Henry fell asleep there. Just then, the other moved his hand and rubbed his eyes, swallowing harshly. Was he crying? Concern bloomed in Alex’s chest. He didn’t understand how they went from their blissed-out sleep, to Henry sitting on the other end of the room, obviously crying and upset about something. What was going on? Alex’s sleep addled brain was struggling to come up a possible explanation and his body was just so damn tired he didn’t know how to articulate his worry.

“Hen?” He whispered making the other boy jump. “Why are you awake, baby? Is something wrong?” Alex made to get up from the bed and take his boy into his arms but Henry waved him off. Alex halted in his tracks, the worry settling deep in his bones once again.

“It’s nothing darling, go back to sleep.” Henry replied in a soft, withdrawn tone that made Alex’s heart clench painfully. Despite him not being able to see Henry’s face in the dark room, he knew the other was lying and Alex just didn’t understand why.

“Are you sure? It’s late, come back to bed, sweetheart,” Alex mumbled, sleep quietly making its way back into his body.

“I’ll be there in a second, just gonna grab a glass of water. I promise, just sleep you need it,” Henry answered in a small voice.

Alex tried to argue but his eyes started to droop and he could feel Henry’s pointed stare on him. “Fine, but hurry, ‘m cold.”

Henry hummed softly and Alex laid back down. He glanced back at his boy, hoping he would just get some water from the bathroom sink and return to his side but the other had turned back around to the bay window his mind obviously not here in their bedroom.

Again, he wished he could see Henry’s face but something told him his boy needed a moment to himself, so he decided to grant him that. Tomorrow. He could ask him tomorrow. They could talk about this tomorrow. He needed a clear mind for this anyway.

Before Alex drifted off once more, a whisper of a memory tickled his brain. A thought, an important one, was trying to grasp his attention and get him to focus. He tried to collect his thoughts and make sure he hadn’t missed anything major, but it was so hard when his mind was a jumbled mess, foggy with stress and the lack of sleep. He really, really tried. But the exhaustion won as Alex closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

Alex wished he could say that the bliss he had felt the previous night followed him into the next day but come morning he was back to being stressed out of his mind.

It all began with him not having set his alarm due to their activities and oversleeping terribly which made him so fucking late that he almost missed his first class of the day. Usually, this wouldn’t be the end of the world but his prof from international law was not his biggest fan to put it lightly, so being late a few weeks before his finals could potentially be the end of the world. (Mind you, this man was stuck in the last century and hated Alex not only on the principle that he wasn’t heterosexual but also dating the monarchy of the enemy. Big sigh.) So yeah, he couldn’t be late or miss a class because he needed to pass this exam and never see this asshole again more than he needed air.

So, when Henry’s alarm went off – something Alex usually only heard when he was leaving late and had time for a lengthy shower – and he was still in bed, this time lying half on top of Henry, his face hidden in the sleep warm skin of his neck, he needed a second to realize what the hell was happening.

As Henry had turned off the incessant ringing, Alex sat up and tried to locate his own phone that was also completely dead since he forgot to plug it in for charging the previous night. He swallowed harshly and tried to sort his racing thoughts. No alarm and no phone battery. Great.

He felt his panic rise when Henry put a soft hand on the small of his back. “Breathe, love. It’s fine you can still make it on time. Cash can take you, so you don’t have to take the tube. Go get yourself ready, I’ll go down and make you some coffee and something to eat in the car. You have everything you need here since you brought your bag with you last night and I got you a new portable charger that you can bring so you’ll have your phone charged in no time at all.” His boyfriend had crowded close to his back and murmured softly into his ear, easing the harsh edges of his nerves.

“Yeah,” he replied in a small voice.

“Off you go,” Henry said and pushed him towards the end of the bed before getting up himself.

After the quickest shower of his life, he had rushed down and was met with a Henry that was once again staring quietly out of the window, lost in his thoughts.

“Baby, you’re alright?” He said while grabbing his coffee and the sandwich Henry had prepared for him. Fuck, he so badly wished he had more time and actually sit Henry down and pry until this stubborn lil fruitcake would tell him what was up.

“You have to leave, Alex. I already called Cash, he’s waiting out in the car,” Henry said and Alex cursed internally knowing he shouldn’t leave but had to. 

“I’ll call you after my class alright, baby?” He said hoping to convey that they needed to talk and not only see each other to get between the sheets.

“Go, Alex,” Henry pressed and Alex knew a dismissal when he saw one. He stepped close to his boyfriend, and pressed a soft kiss to Henry’s lips hoping to show him it was okay to come to him and share what was going on in his mind but Henry did not respond as much as he would have liked.

A loud honk from outside reminded Alex of how late he really was and Henry pecked his cheek once before pushing him towards the front door. “Go.” He said again and Alex just nodded, grabbed the bag he had discarded there yesterday and rushed out of the door.

Now a few hours later, after he had managed to step into the lecture hall, only two minutes too late while everyone was still settling in, he was pacing the small living room of his downtown apartment. He had to come here quickly to grab some books he needed for class and meetings this afternoon. As soon as he had entered the eerie quietness of this flat, that never even began to feel like home but only served as a solution to a logistic issue, his mind was going haywire.

He was staring out of the window trying to sort out his thoughts, something he had been trying to do for what felt like an eternity but he just couldn't figure out what happened to Henry.

Usually, he was confident in the knowledge that he could tell when Henry was struggling with something but right now his mind was drawing blank.

He needed to talk to someone. Maybe Henry had confided in someone else because Alex had been so absent the past few weeks. His stomach turned unpleasantly. Had he given Henry the impression that he didn’t have time for him? Dios mio. This was not what he had wanted at all.

Alex pulled out his phone, contemplating who Henry was most likely to go to.

June and Nora were out of the question since he had talked to them yesterday and they didn’t hint at anything. Nora even said Henry seemed fine when she last saw him.

Next, he thought of Bea but when he pulled out his phone and opened their chat he was reminded that she was currently somewhere in Thailand backpacking with a bunch of friends and absolutely no phone service whatsoever…so, she was not an option either.

He rubbed his eyebrow and knew he had only one other option and he hated to go behind Henry’s back like this because this one person was the first one Henry let in his life on his own volition and had decided that this person would be the first to love him no matter what he shared with them. And Alex knew this person knew Henry better than he knew himself.

But desperate times called for desperate measures. And Alex was desperate. He needed to find the reason why his boy was acting so weird lately. If it was something serious and Alex didn’t learn about until it was possibly too late, he would never forgive himself.

He switched chats to the one he knew could help him.

Alex (1:09pm)

hey p!

are you free today by any chance?

need ur wisdom 🙈

percylicious 🍬 (1:11pm)

I am always free for you my gorgeous darling.

Are you downtown?

If yes, I would propose some good old Pretzel Bites at CP.

I fancy myself some deliciously fake cheese sauce.

Alex (1:12pm)

yeah, ‘m in the city

meet you at our usual spot in 20?

percylicious 🍬 (1:15pm)

Splendid!

See you soon, babes❤️🔥

A relieved sigh escaped Alex’s lips as soon as he had the confirmation that he would get to talk about Henry with someone who loved him almost as much as Alex himself did.

He quickly changed and got his stuff ready for his afternoon classes before he rushed out of the apartment, making his way towards Central Park.

Twenty minutes later, Alex was waiting anxiously for a certain someone that was not only called like a brand of sweets but also dressed just as colourful. Cash was waiting on the corner of the street, making sure nothing was out of the ordinary while also giving Alex the air of privacy. Even their security had caught on that something was up with Prince Henry. Just a moment after Alex arrived a head of cotton candy pink hair dressed in a coat with a bright green and blue pattern came into view making his racing heart calm down a bit.

Hopefully, they would find a solution now.

When Pez came into reach, he opened his arms and Alex gratefully accepted the hug and the peck on the cheek, typical Pez.

“Good afternoon, my dear Alexander. How are we on this fine Wednesday?” Pez said with a squeeze to his shoulders.

“I’m fine, what about you?”

“Oh, I cannot complain. Though I wish our lovely Henry would accompany me at the shelter now and then because holiday prep is in full swing, and I could use his magic hands at decorating. You know, I know how to decorate myself but Christmas trees have never been my forte.” He mused while linking their elbows and directing Alex into the park.

When the brunette man registered what his best friend just said he stopped in his tracks again. “Wait what did you just say?”

Pez threw him a glance. “Just that Henry hasn’t been to the shelter in like two weeks. He called in sick…but why do you look like as if this was the first time you were hearing of this?”

Alex swallowed harshly. What the fuck was going on? “Because it is.”

Pez pulled him along to a bench and forced him to sit down. His hands were shaking slightly.

“Alexander, what is going on?”

“I have no idea, Pez. That’s why I called you.”

“So, I gather, Henry is not actually sick at home with the flu and you have been there to check up on him despite your schedule so I should not be worried and make the long journey out to Brooklyn for him?”

Alex sighed heavily, running a hand through his curls, messing them up. “No. I just saw him this morning and he certainly did not have the flu. Pez, why the fuck is he lying? This is so unlike him.”

“Honey, you need to give me a run-down of everything that happened in the past few weeks.”

And Alex did exactly that. At least the parts he could talk about because quite frankly he hadn’t seen much of his boy for weeks now. Not nearly as much as he would have wanted in any case.

Pez kept quiet during his recount except for humming softly and shaking his head now and then. So unlike him, he was concerned too.

When Alex finished, they sat in silence for a moment, Percy obviously trying to sort out his thoughts just as Alex had been doing for the better part of two weeks now.

“Mh, I think I know what this is about and I’m absolutely not surprised about it or the fact that he didn’t talk to anyone not June, not Nora, not me, and least of all you.” Pez mused with a small frown on his forehead.

“What do you mean? Pez, I swear to God, I have a million things going through my head, I am running on two hours of sleep, three red bulls a day, and several hundred pages of textbook knowledge. I think my blood is black coffee with a sprinkle of cinnamon at this point and I just need to know that the love of my life is not about to fall apart when I cannot give him the time he bloody deserves. Why won’t he just talk to me? We can find a solution for everything. We always have even when we were living on different sides of the world.” Alex urged, his voice rising slightly, his breath laboured.

Percy looked at him. “And that is just it, isn’t it?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Alex said with a huff. He rubbed his stinging eyes roughly.

“Look dear, if you just take a step back and view the situation from Henry’s perspective it won’t come as a surprise to you why he has been acting so off lately. You just said it yourself. You’ve been stressed out of your mind with school the past few weeks and you studied so much you literally worked yourself dry. You had so much on your mind that you fell back into old patterns of not sleeping and you didn’t have much time to spend at home with Henry at all. The both of you only had a few moments together where you could just exist, there was no time for deep talk.” Pez started with a soft voice.

“Way to make me feel less guilty, thanks man.” Alex said in a small voice, his eyes glued to the sandy floor beneath the bench.

“Right, and now put yourself into Henry’s shoes.”

Alex glanced back up, his mind trying to follow where Percy was going with this.

“Whatever he’s struggling with, he didn’t want to put it on top of your own sorrows,” Pez added gently, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Alex furrowed his brows. “But he knows he can always come to me no matter what. I would’ve dropped everything if he had asked me to help him, support him, or just be with him.”

“You know this is not how Henry’s mind works. He would have felt guilty to take you away from your work, from your passion Alexander. My best bet is that he tried to work through this himself but couldn’t find a way that was really helping and that is how he started to fell into a slump. You know how he gets; he doesn’t want to be a burden. It’s one of his biggest fears after years of neglect and living in this godforsaken family. And so he decided to just shut everyone out before he burdened anyone or got hurt in the process of looking for help. He didn’t have much luck in the family department before you all came along, as you know.”

“Fuck.”

Of course this was it. Before he and Henry had gotten closer and eventually into a relationship and Henry found a new family in Alex and his family, his memories of family were tainted at best. Especially ever since his dad had passed away and he lost his mum along the way, everything changed for the worse. From Henry’s recounts Alex knew that the older boy had to work through his own grief and sadness with Bea dealing with her own demons and Phillip becoming the marionette of the queen. No one had time for Henry or his struggles and he would never demand someone make time for him. That was not like Henry and so it really should have come as no surprise to Alex that this time wasn’t any different.

What’s the saying? Old habits die hard.

So, of course his boy had not wanted to put any extra pressure on Alex in this stressful time and tried to find a way to deal with it on his own. God, Alex wanted to whack him with all the love and affection he had in his heart for this stupid, stupid, tender boy.

Suddenly, it was so obvious why Henry didn’t want to talk about it.

Alex’s subconscious had felt that Henry was dipping into one of his moods but his mind was so damn occupied with law school and finals that he didn’t really read the signs before the fall came too close.

Thinking about how exhausted and distant Henry had looked this morning before Alex had rushed off to campus, he realised last night must have been just another one in a subsequent line of sleepless nights for the older boy. Finally knowing there was something that he kept hidden from Alex because he feared to be a burden pulled at his heartstrings until it felt like his heart was dissolving completely.

“Fuck, Pez. He must be so hurt and I haven’t been there to help him.” Alex cursed.

“Don’t blame yourself, strumpet. You have so much on your plate at the moment and Henry knows that too. I would bet my gorgeous ruby ring on him not saying anything to not take your focus off of your work. He may act incredibly stupid sometimes but he’s doing it out of the goodness of his heart,” Pez shook his head fondly.

Alex chuckled in response. “Yeah, that sounds like Henry. God, his family really messed him up. He has been doing so well over the summer that I almost forgot how much emotional damage and lasting baggage these people have given him. He used to tell me stories of how it was not a fairy tale to grow up a prince but that his dad always made sure to fill the house with love and safety, guiding Henry to not become –“

And then he remembered a conversation they had somewhere in a nameless hotel in the middle of the night, shadowed by the knowledge of how their time was running out fast.

In the eerie safety of the soft moonlight, Henry had held him, covered his shoulders with his broad and strong body, and made butterflies erupt in Alex’s chest while drawing mindless patterns on his naked stomach. After leaving a constellation of kisses on Alex’s bare shoulder, the prince started telling him more about his past, something the brunette boy soaked up greedily even if he hadn’t understood why that was back then.

His words were nothing more than a whisper but to Alex they couldn’t have been louder. Whenever Henry offered a piece of himself, Alex wanted to wrap it up and keep it safe in his heart – after all the prince was important enough to take these measures.

“When I was little, my dad used to tell me stories all the time. Bea and Philip were always much more outgoing than me and, frankly, I never had a lot of friends. So oftentimes I stayed at home when both of them were off playing with cousins or the school mates, grandmother approved of. I never really minded being left behind because it meant I got more time with my dad. Back then I believed my dad was my best friend because he was the coolest person I knew… like he had all those books and he was always reading one script or another and even though I didn’t understand what it meant to be an actor yet, I knew my dad left a legacy for generations to come. And when he would tell me his stories, made up ones, real ones, or the ones he read for his work, I knew I wanted to tell stories too. I guess deep down I also wanted to create something that would be a real fucking legacy to leave but I was far too young to really grasp the idea. However, my dad must have seen this light in me and he wanted to shake it up, make it grow bigger, and turn into a flame of passion for literature that still burns bright to this day. But he also knew it was kind of impossible for someone in our family to pursue their real dreams. So, my dad started teaching me about the stars. Because in his words ‘never stop reaching for the stars, because that is where you’ll find the essence of your dreams.’”

At this the prince stopped for a second, breathing shakily and obviously trying to compose himself.

“That’s beautiful, Henry. Your dad sounds amazing.” Alex replied in an equally soft tone, grabbing one of Henry’s hands, and pressing a sweet kiss to it.

“Yeah, he is my favourite person and not a day goes by where I don’t miss him infinitely. You know along with the stories, he also taught me about the different constellations and their meanings. He used to let me ask all those random questions and he never once told me off for wanting to know more. He always encouraged me to ask for things I wanted to know but even more so for things that I needed. Especially, when I got older and started to struggle with my mental health and started to understand my sexuality – even though I never got to tell my dad about either – he always brought me back to the stars and reminded me that they would forever be there for me. And this way he himself would never be much further away.”

“Was this why you were looking for Orion when I found you under the Linden tree?” Alex whispered, hoping he wasn’t overstepping, feared Henry would retreat back into his carefully crafted armour.

The warm breath of a hum hit the back of Alex’s neck and the younger boy relaxed slightly.

“Yeah, when I was about seven, my dad showed me Orion for the very first time and we both decided it was the coolest constellation of them all,” Henry chuckled softly, the vibration feeling nice against Alex’s back. Alex started drawing small circles on the back of the other’s hand.

“Not only was the story pretty cool, but also the meaning, God Alex, the meaning of these silly little stars a million light years away was what made it the most important one to this day. It has been used by stargazers and sailors to navigate their journey and offered them guidance and clarity on where to go in their life. My dad made sure I understood that these stars were older than time itself and that they would always be there for me even if he wasn’t anymore. So, whenever I need guidance, whenever I miss him or want to talk to him, I go look for Orion because then he’d be just a heartbeat away. Before he passed, he promised me he would always be my Orion and that is how I learned to live with the cold emptiness in my heart.”

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I can’t even begin to imagine what this must feel like. But I’m so glad you both had this, just the two of you. It’s a beautiful memory. Thank you for sharing this with me.”

Another sweet kiss was pressed to his shoulder.

“Thank you for listening. I tried to make my peace with it, dad made me promise I’d keep going. I mean, it’s still hard and it will always be hard but as long as I have Orion I can do it, dad made sure I’d keep this in my heart. But without it? Full disclosure, without it I’d be lost.”

Alex gasped when his mind finally connected the confusing fragments, as he began to grasp why Henry had been turning back to old habits.

He looked over to Pez who had been silently watching him for several minutes now. “Where have you just gone to?” The other man said with a raised eyebrow.

“Pray tell my dear Percy, has Henry said anything about his book lately?”

Pez scratched his chin in thought, not even questioning Alex’s random question, bless him.

“Mh, now that you mention it. It’s been a while since he spoke about it. The last time I recall must have been sometime in September, I think?”

“I figured.”

“Why?”

“And what happens in September and gets worse for the rest of the year?”

His best friend threw him a strange look. “The weather?”

“Well yeah but not that.”

“By all means, Alexander, please enlighten me because now I am in the position of not knowing whatever you might be talking about.”

“It’s simple really, we just don’t have much light these days,” Alex said with a shrug. “And what comes with less light? Right, more darkness.”

“I see,” Pez replied, his face showing a small hint of recognition.

“And what does Henry gravitate to when it’s dark and he is stressed and lonely?”

“Oh.” Pez’s eyes turned soft and sad when he understood where Alex was going with this.

“And what does New York decidedly not offer with its light pollution and the never-ending mass of people, buildings, and noise?”

“The quiet solitude and vastness of the night sky,” the other offered gently.

“Correct.”

The heavy stone of anxiety and guilt was still big and burning but with the knowledge of why Henry was struggling helped him settle his mind and focus on a way to help his boy.

His beautiful, caring, stubborn asshole of a boyfriend that constantly thought he was too much when, in fact, Alex was certain he could never get enough of Henry Fox. Alex knew he would spend the rest of his life making sure Henry was aware of this. But right now, he needed to give Henry the one thing New York couldn’t give him and even if Alex wasn’t able to fulfil Henry’s biggest wish, he could at least try his hardest to give him something to hold.

The thing is, Alex could never live with himself knowing that Henry was unable to find Orion. He never wanted to see how Henry’s eyes clouded over with sadness and the numbing realisation of how far away his dad really was, his disappointment tangible in the quiet air of the night.

Alex wanted to give Henry everything he could. But this he was unable to do. He couldn’t give Henry Arthur back and it cut deep. Alex wanted nothing more than for Henry to feel close to his dad, no matter how many years had gone by since Henry had to say goodbye to the most important person in his life. He would do anything in his power to make sure that Henry wouldn’t have to face another loss in his life even if it was just bloody stars they were talking about. No, he would give Henry the whole damn sky if it kept his eyes from losing the shimmer of warmth and happiness that lit up the baby blue from within.

“I think I have a plan,” Alex said with a smile spreading on his face.

“Excellent news, strumpet. If I can be of assistance in any shape or form, please let me know, yeah?”

“Of course. But I think I got this. All I’m asking is for Henry to get a few more days off, I think it’s about time my baby gets some fresh southern air,” Alex said with a hopeful glint in his eyes.

Pez laughed and patted his shoulder. “I guess we are going to make a Christmas tree decoration contest after all.”

“Thank you, Pez. I owe you!”

“Nonsense, dearest. But you can pay me back in pretzel bites. I think I deserve them after solving the riddle that is Henry Fox’s very smart but very silly brain.”

“You absolutely do, Mr. Okonjo. C’mon, I have a bit more time before my next class and pretzel bites sound fucking ace,” Alex answered while standing up, pulling his friend with him.

Fuck, he finally had a plan.

Time to show Henry exactly how silly his brain can be. And how much Alex actually loved him.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

After a few more days and nights of cramming in everything he needed to study while also planning the surprise he had for Henry, come Saturday, his plan was finally ready to be set in motion.

It was barely 7 in the morning (which should be a crime on the weekend but since it is the love of his life they were talking about, Alex could make amends) but the brunette boy hoped Henry did not have any plans later on Alex might have forgotten about.

When he unlocked the front door and was met with Shaan’s warm brown eyes, he relaxed slightly. If Henry were out, Shaan would definitely have the morning off.

“Good morning, Shaan! Just the man I wanted to see. Is everything prepared?” Alex exclaimed upon seeing him.

“Yes. We are ready to set off. I let the royal family know that Henry won’t be available for the coming week. Plane sets off in roughly two hours and I took the liberty to call your father and ask him for the contacts of the people who stock up the house, so you’ll be fully stocked for the time you’ll be there.”

“Shaan, I could kiss you! I was just going to the shops once we’re there but this is amazing. Honestly best equerry in the world. You deserve a raise, lemme talk to Henry about that,” Alex squealed.

“As my wife once so beautifully said ‘touch me and die’ but you are welcome. I too want him to get better. It’s been a tough few weeks.”

“I agree.”

“But Alex, you both need this. So, please take the time for yourself too.”

“Thanks, Shaan, I will. But just getting out of the city and be with him will help. It’s always been like that.” Shaan nodded and the corners of his lips lift in a small smile. Alex smiled back before making his way into the flat.

Just like the last time he came home, the downstairs was eerily quiet, no music or TV playing, no teapot boiling, no piano tinkering. But again, it was still quite early.

This time, however, it didn’t scare Alex quite as much because he had a plan and a plan was almost as good as a list to settle his racing mind.

Alex threw his shoes off and quickly walked up the stairs, first checking the office and the book corner on the landing which both were quiet and empty. He couldn’t hear the shower running so it was safe to say that his boy was still in their bedroom. Possibly still sleeping. Hopefully.  

The door was ajar slightly, the warm light of their bedside lamps was lighting up the hallway softly. Since it was still quite dark out, this meant Henry was awake already. Or probably, still. Alex closed his eyes and took a deep calming breathe. He so badly hoped this week away will help his boy. He needed him to be happy and settled again.

When he walked in, he was met with Henry lying on Alex’s side of the bed, a worn copy of Pride and Prejudice in his hands, absolutely absorbed into his favourite book. Alex’s heart thudded painfully; Henry really needed the comfort.

Time to give him what he deserves.

Alex opened the door wide and walked in with a sunny smile, startling Henry.

“Good morning, baby!” He exclaimed while walking over to their closet and pulling out a suitcase and duffle bags out of the storage.

“Alex? What’s going on? Are you alright?” Henry asked, an air of worry clouding his voice.

Alex snickered to himself. His boy never worked well with surprises; he couldn’t wait to see his face when he realized what was going on.

“Darling?” The brunette boy heard movement behind him where he was grabbing clothes for Henry and himself (yes most of his stuff was here and not at his actual flat, sue him, this was home). “What are you doing?”

“I’m taking you on an adventure,” Alex said matter of factly, not offering any further explanation.

“Right now?” Henry asked bewildered.

“Right now.” He confirmed.

“Why?”

“Why not?” Oh, he was enjoying this far too much. He loved nothing more than riling up his little prince and making him lose some of his royal composure.

“Why not? Are you serious? Where are we going? Why are you packing so much stuff?” He could feel Henry’s incredulous stare burning a hole into his dark blue Georgetown sweatshirt. The grin on his face grew.

“We’ll be gone for a few days,” Alex relented, not wanting his boyfriend to panic.

“A few- what? Alex, are you alright?”

“I am more than fine. Why wouldn’t I?”

Henry walked over to him and stopped him in his packing, two hands on his shoulders turning him towards the taller boy. He was still in his pyjamas, soft plaid bottoms and one of Alex’s black NYC law hoodies. Alex loved him.

“What about your finals? You can’t just leave for days right before your exams? How long are we even talking? Where are we going? You should be here and study. What about your classes and your study groups – and I,” Henry’s breathing picked up and all Alex wanted was to wrap him up in is arms. So, that is exactly what he was doing. He dropped the shirts he had just grabbed and put his arms around his boy, wrapping them around his waist and pulling him into his body.

“Baby, you and I both know that something is going on with you and I think a few days out of the city will help you recentre yourself. I know you think my mind is completely focused on these finals but you cannot fool me. I know something is up even if you try your hardest to convince me otherwise. And I love you for this but frankly, you’re an idiot.”

Henry’s body had tensed for a second before he gasped. “Hey!”

“You are. Because how is it that even after two years you still don’t know that you are my priority. And yes, those exams are important but there is nothing more important than you are. So, do you trust me?”

Henry took a trembling breath. “Of course I trust you. What a stupid question. I just couldn’t live with myself if I made you lose your focus. I couldn’t live with myself if you lost precious study time because of me and my stupid needs. And well, taking me out of town for days on end is exactly that.”

Alex tutted offended. “Hey, that’s my boyfriend you’re calling stupid here! That is so not on. Baby, your needs are never stupid, and I don’t want to hear you dismissing them just like that. And honestly these exams will come either way and me taking you away doesn’t mean I cannot have a look at my notes. So, let me do this for you. I promise I can afford to spend a few days to surprise my boyfriend without endangering my whole tuition. My study groups will be fine without me and to be honest I am absolutely not mad about not seeing Jeff and Andrew for a whole week.”

Alex cradled Henry’s jaw gently and pressed a sweet kiss on his nose that made the other chuckle lightly.

“I guess more arguing, won’t get me anywhere, will it?” The blonde man sighed.

Alex snickered. “Absolutely not. See you can be smart if you want to.”

“Fine,” Henry sighed again and turned his head to press a kiss against the palm of Alex’s hand.

“Splendid!”

“At least, let me do the packing. It’s atrocious how bad you still are at it despite having family overseas and travelling between states for years now.”

“I would be offended now but actually you’re right and we have places to be so please do the honours. I’ll get us some snacks for the trip and get David’s stuff ready. He’s going to auntie June and auntie Nora for the time being.”

Henry looked at him softly before he pulled him in and kissed him. When he pulled back, he brushed a wayward curl away from Alex’s face and pressed his forehead against his.

“I love so much, do you know that?”

“I know.” Alex’s breathed softly and pecked Henry’s lips again before pulling back. “But we don’t have time for taking this any further because as I said we have places to be.”

“Fine. Are you at least telling me where we’re going?”

“Nope,” Alex winked at him making Henry groan. “That’s all part of the surprise. You don’t need to know anything until we’re there. Please, don’t stress your pretty little head.”

Henry threw him a look. “Have you met me?”

Alex let out a small laugh. “I promise you will love it once we’re there.” He was interrupted by an incoming text on his phone. He took it out of his back pocket and glanced at the message seeing it was Cash telling him they would set off in thirty minutes.

“Right baby, car will be here in 30. Get yourself ready. I’ll make sure everything is off and wait for Nora to pick up David. Get yourself ready sweetheart, but don’t worry about clothes we’ll be travelling for most of the day, so make it comfy. I’ll see you in a mo.” Alex said and pressed another quick peck to Henry’s cheek, not letting the blonde man ask more questions and making him spill the beans after all.

The brunette man rushed downstairs and put together David’s food, his favourite toys, and his leash, so he was good to go. After that he made himself a coffee in his to-go cup and boiled water for Henry’s tea while preparing a tote bag with some Jaffa Cakes for his boy and some soft baked chocolate chip cookies for himself. He also grabbed some strawberries and grapes, knowing they would probably get something to eat at the airport but wanting to have something on hand nonetheless.

Just as he was done, Henry came down carrying their luggage, dressed in soft black leggings and an oversized grey hoodie that neither of them knew who it had belonged to before. He was a sight to behold and Alex would have loved to drag him back up to their bedroom and take those sinfully tight leggings right back off. But alas, they had to leave in like ten minutes.

“You’re good to go, baby?” Alex asked? Henry hummed a yes when he saw the two to-go cups and his eyes lit up. He was about to say something when the front door opened and a distinct female voice yelled.

“Good morning assholes, I’m here to pick up my nephew at the ass crack of dawn so you can go be naughty in another state!”

“Nora!” Henry called outraged and walked over to her.

“What? I’m right, aren’t I? Also good for you, y’all need to let off some steam.” She looked pointedly at both of them.

Alex walked over to her and hugged her quickly whispering a thank you in her ear to which she just patted his back softly. He had a lengthy discussion over the phone with Nora after Percy must have hinted at something as she demanded to know what he had planned. Of course, she and June were more than happy to take David and water Henry’s beloved plants, so their boy could enjoy Alex’s surprise with no guilt of leaving his children at home.

As soon as he let Nora go, Henry was there and took her in his arms murmuring something intelligible into her ear. She laughed and squeezed his shoulders, whispering something back.

Alex glanced at his phone and saw another text from Cash, telling him he’s waiting outside.

“All right you two, we really gotta go. Nora, you can stay and take your time, just lock up behind you because the PPOs will be gone too. Hen, baby, we have to leave or we will have a very displeased Cash on our hands.”

At that Henry chuckled softly. “We wouldn’t want that. Let me just say goodbye to David real quick.” He added before rushing out of the kitchen to find their dog.

Nora looked at him again with a knowing smile on her face. “I have to say you two are so sickeningly sweet most of the time that it really is disgusting but this might be one of the most romantic things you ever pulled for him and, I mean, you stormed a fucking castle. He’s gonna be so happy. And you both deserve this break.”

Alex looked at his best friend and felt tears welling up in his eyes. “Thank you, N. And thank you for helping me, I love you.”

“I love you too, loser. Now get out of my sight, I’m ready to have some auntie time with my favourite.” Alex laughed and wiped away the tears before Henry saw and made a big deal out of it. Nothing, literally nothing will stop them from boarding this plane.

“Darling? I think Cash is about to jump out of this car, we might want to go.” Henry called from the front door.

“Shit! Yeah, let’s go. Bye, Nora. Tell June I love her too.”

“Yeah, yeah, will do. Now leave or Henry might find a way to convince Cash to stay here so you can keep studying.” She said while pushing him towards the front door. “Be safe. Come back soon. Love you both, do nothing I wouldn’t to either. Yadda yadda ya.”

Without another word Alex grabbed the door handle and opened up the heavy wood, pushing Henry gently outside once it was open wide enough.

After putting their luggage into the trunk, both men clambered into the backseat of the black van and Alex shot Cash a sunny smile. The other rolled his eyes but threw a glance to Henry who was staring out of the window – his mind seemingly somewhere else once again. Over the last few months Cash and Amy had gotten really protective over Henry and they wanted to keep him safe and sound just as much as Alex – if not even more. At the moment, Amy was in DC to cover for an agent on maternity leave and Alex’s mom had requested her specifically. But the point still stands. Cash looked back to Alex and a question clouded his eyes. The younger boy nodded in response and Cash sighed softly.

Without another word, he started the engine and pulled away from the curb.

Alex looked over to Henry and put his hand on the other’s thigh, his open palm up, inviting Henry to lace their hands together. He felt Henry’s underlying anxiety clear as day, the other boy clearly still hesitant to leave and worried about their destination and scared to take Alex away from his studies.

Despite his worries, the blonde-haired man immediately opened up his tensely clasped hands and intertwined his with Alex’s bigger one. Alex would never get over the fact that Henry was so much bigger than himself but his hands were so delicate and soft – in fact, he was obsessed with Henry’s dainty details you only really found when you looked close enough. And damn Alex loved to look and learn.

“So, are you going to –“ Henry started and Alex shushed him with a shake of his head.

“Nuhuu, you don’t need to lose breathe over this question, I am not going to tell you where we’re going. All you need to know is that we’re going by plane, the rest is none of your business at this point.” Henry threw him an exasperated look but kept quiet. Instead of arguing, he started to play with Alex’s fingers.

The rest of the drive was quiet and Henry didn’t even raise a brow when they were immediately escorted to the private air strip where Pez’s plane was waiting. Bless him, at least he knew how to pick his battles.

As soon as Cash stopped the car, Alex jumped out and walked to Henry’s side, opening the door for him with a little bow.

Henry sighed but a small blush painted his cheeks a beautiful dusty pink. He had a little thing for Alex treating him like a princess.

“C’mon baby, the plane is waiting.” Alex said, offering him his hand and pulling him out of the car. Cash handed the keys over to another PPO and got their luggage out of the trunk before getting on the plane.

Henry and Alex followed him quietly.

“Who’s coming with us?” Henry asked when they settled down in their seats, Henry at the window because he liked to be as close to the sky as possible. Of course, Alex let him.

“Only Cash. I’ve given Shaan a few days off, thought he could take the time and go to DC, visit Zahra.”

Henry’s eyes softened. “I love you.”

Yeah, his boy really was a sucker for romantic gestures even if it wasn’t between themselves.

“Love you too, baby. Now, how about you’ll take a little nap? We’re gonna be in the air for a few hours and you’ll need your energy for tonight,” Alex said with a wink. Henry raised his eyebrows and subconsciously licked his lips.

The brunette man snorted and gently hit his boyfriend’s chest. “Get your mind out of the gutter, dios mio. I am not talking about sex.”

“Whatever you say, sweetheart.” Henry answered with a twinkle in his eyes. Oh, it was good to see him already loosen up a bit. Taking him away from the city was already paying off. Alex was elated.  

He leaned over and pressed a kiss to Henry’s cheek, softly cupping the other and pulling his head onto his own shoulder. “Sleep.”

“Bossy.”

“You love it.” Alex laughed and started to play with the soft sandy strands.

Henry hummed in response and dutifully closed his eyes. A few minutes later, he was out like a light. Just as Alex had thought, his boy probably hadn’t slept at all the night before.

A small sigh escaped his lips and he turned his head to press a loving kiss into Henry’s hair, inhaling the fresh, grassy smell of his boy and trying to relax himself. He hadn’t let himself relax and steer too far away from focus for the better part of two months now and even during his Thanksgiving break he had mostly used his time out of class to study for his classes. So, right now? Right now was the first time he could fully focus on the situation at hand, on himself, and of course Henry.

He tried to loosen up his tense muscles and tell his brain to shut the fuck up for the next few days because as much as Henry needed this time off, Alex probably needed it more, if he was completely honest to himself. He closed his eyes and with the gentle hum of the plane and Henry’s soft puffs of air that hit Alex’s collarbone, the younger man fell asleep too.

 ⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

A short few hours later, Alex was brought back to consciousness by a hand on his shoulder, Cash slowly shaking him awake.

“Alex? We’re about to land. You should wake your boy up and get ready for take down,” the agent said softly.

“Thanks, man,” Alex replied and rubbed his eyes, waking himself up. He turned his head and was met with a tufts of sand coloured hair and Henry’s face completely hidden in Alex’s neck. He smiled down at his boy for a second before lifting his hand and softly stroking along Henry’s pronounced cheek bones and his jaw.

“Henry, my love? It’s time to wake up,” he whispered gently, his finger moving back and forth over his cheek.

Just a moment later, the other boy’s lashes fluttered before he opened his eyes slowly. Sleepy soft blue found Alex’s chocolate brown and a soft smile played on Henry’s sinful lips.

“Welcome back, angel. Sorry, to interrupt your little slumber party, but we’re about to land and we should get ready for that,” Alex murmured with a smile of his own.

Henry looked at him with a puzzled expression. “We’re landing already? It felt like it’s been ten minutes since we took off." He sat himself up, unfortunately taking away his sleepy warmth from Alex’s side, and rubbed his eyes.

“Nope, we slept for a solid four and half hours,” Alex replied absentmindedly, tracing his boyfriend’s beautiful features with his eyes.

“Four hours? Alex have you taken me to Texas?” Henry asked with a little gasp.

Alex snapped his mouth shut and chastised himself for letting the secret slip in the last possible second. “I might.”

Henry gave him an incredulous look. “Alexander, we declined coming to family Thanksgiving and had your mum give us the silent treatment for a full two weeks because we stayed in New York because we decided you needed the break to study, just for you to bring us here on a whim even closer to your exams? She’s going to be so angry, oh lord.” He put his head in his hands and sighed heavily.

Alex snickered which earned him another unimpressed look.

“Don’t worry baby. It has all been cleared with my mom. She made me promise to spend all of Christmas with them this year for this and since we planned to do that anyway it was an easy trade. And look, when the President of the United States expects you at her Christmas party not even the royal family of Britain can say anything against it. So, no Sandringham for you this year. Isn’t that gorgeous?” Alex said in a very bad imitation of an English accent making his boy break out into laughter.

“Oh, of course. The Mountchristen-Windsors couldn’t possibly risk another international scandal. So, thank you for getting me out of this,” Henry said with a solemn expression and a serious nod.

“No need to thank me, baby. I’ll always be your knight in shining armour,” Alex exclaimed seriously.

They shared a look and broke into a fit of giggles. Henry’s building worries once again eliminated.

“Also, I’m serious mom understood why we didn’t come and she is more than understanding of why we have come here now.” Alex said soothingly.

“Well. That is a relief. So, tell me. Why are we h-“

“I am sorry to interrupt, Mr. Claremont-Diaz, Your Royal Highness,” the flight attendant said with an apologetic look, “but we’re landing in two minutes, I have to ask you to put your seatbelts on and put stay seated correctly.”

“No worries, Janet. Thanks for letting us know,” Alex said with a sunny smile before she walked away again.

He turned back to Henry. “I am still not telling you why we’re here. Just wait a few more hours and I promise you will know. Just go with the flow, baby. C’mon, indulge me,” Alex said with a wink. Henry sighed but nodded. “Perfect.”

Not long after, they were back in another car, driving down the highway in the warm afternoon sun of Texas. Henry had been quiet for the past thirty minutes and Alex knew he was still trying to figure out why they were here but Alex knew when to let him ponder over his thoughts and when to intervene. Right now, his boy was calm and relaxed, there was no need to say anything. Henry would never guess why there were here anyway.

Two hours later, Cash parked the Jeep in front of Oscar’s lake house, the sun reflecting on the water softly, making it shimmer. The house itself stood there sturdy, warm, and homey as ever and Alex felt his nerves settle, the stress loosen its tight grip around his body, and a smile break out on his lips.

It had been far too long since they last were here. It was back in summer during the 4^th of July weekend with the whole family and the super six finally reunited. Back then Henry was terrified of being back here, the memories of what happened the year before still fresh in their minds as the blonde boy had never forgiven himself for abandoning Alex like this, even if Alex did a long time ago. The note still lived in his wallet to this day. A reminder that they found a way through the wall. That they won.

After that weekend and Alex showing Henry exactly how he had forgiven him, Henry wanted to stay a few days longer, replacing the bad memories with good ones. Now, it was one of their favourite places in the world.

Henry stepped over to him with their luggage in hand. Cash turned towards the house next door which has become the official place for the PPOs and secret service agents to stay while they were here. He saluted them before disappearing into the dark house.

“Now it’s just us,” Alex sighed happily.

“We’re alone?”

“We are. Just Cash is here but I told him it was basically paid vacation because I am planning to enjoy some much-needed time alone with my boyfriend.”

“Oh,” Henry breathed his eyes fluttering close.

Alex smiled and nudged him gently. “C’mon, let’s get you in and settled. Shaan stocked us up and I for one could use some pancakes with strawberries right about now.”

Henry opened his eyes, a soft look and fond smile lighting up his face. “You really planned all of this, didn’t you?”

“Of course, I did. Just the best for my baby. So, in we go. I promised a gorgeous blonde man with mesmerizing blue eyes that I would still get some studying done while he was lounging next to me on the sun bed enjoying the warm rays of the late fall sun.”

“Oh, did you now?” Henry said with a raised eyebrow.

“I sure did. So, chop chop.” Alex laughed while grabbing Henry’s elbow and dragging him into the direction of the house, opening up the front door, and taking them into the warmth of their family lake house.

A few hours later, after Alex had made them a stack of deliciously fluffy pancakes and a little fun with leftover whipped cream ended in both of them needing a thorough shower badly, they had changed into lighter clothes and settled down on the large sun bed on the wooden deck behind the house that faced the lake.

They had lounged there for a few hours, Henry with a novel Nora had recommended to him and Alex with his laptop and law books he had brought from home. He had been serious when he said that taking Henry away from the city wouldn’t stop him from studying and Henry had relaxed visibly when he saw that it was the truth. That being said, Alex himself felt considerably less stressed here, even if the exams came either way, just being away from the looming presence of NYU helped him settle his mind and focus. Of course, the notion of being home home and having Henry by his side were already balm to his stressed soul.

Henry had been so absorbed in the book that he hadn’t noticed that the sun was already setting, something Alex was desperately awaiting. As soon as the beautiful light blue of the Texan sky started to turn orangey pink and darkened to a beautiful indigo, the last step of Alex’s plan and the actual surprise for his boy could finally take place.

Alex had finished studying an hour ago and just had cuddled up next to Henry and burrowed close to the taller man. Henry hadn’t even lifted his eyes from the pages but just adjusted himself to give Alex the space to crawl as close as possible.

He really wished he could take a nap right here, close to Henry and stealing his warmth, but he had a plan to follow and he would not fuck this up.

He turned his head to the side and pressed his lips to Henry’s neck, leaving a kiss there.

“How does dinner sound, mi amor?” He asked softly, his breath making goosebumps erupt on the delicate skin of Henry’s neck.

Henry put the bookmark (a picture of Alex and David playing at the beach – which cute) into his book and closed it gently.

“First pancakes and an unlimited supply of Jaffa Cakes and sour Skittles and now you want to cook me dinner? To what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Other than being amazing, beautiful, caring, selfless, loyal, hot as hell, and my best friend? Oh, just that I love you,” Alex said with a small smile.

Henry’s cheeks turned a pretty cherry red which Alex just had to press a kiss to. “Oh, stop it,” Henry slapped his arm gently but his eyes turned soft and shiny at the affection Alex was so easily showing him. Alex was obsessed with this look.

“Why would I? My boyfriend deserves to hear this so let me tell him.”

Henry chuckled wetly and cupped Alex’s face in his hands. “You are all of these things and so much more. You’re strong and resilient, ambitious, honest, determined, and so, so loving. Sometimes I don’t know how I deserve you but I thank the heavens you decided to love me.”

Alex took a shuddering breath and tried to blink away the tears that have started to form. Henry’s thumb gently wiped them away before they could fall as the taller man pressed his forehead against Alex’s.

“Damn, I didn’t intend to cry before dinner? You absolute asshole, stop being so fucking cute,” Alex grumbled with a laugh.

“Did you plan to cry after dinner or why the set timeframe?” Henry mumbled into the space between them.

“I repeat myself; you asshole.”

“Well, you started it you absolute demon, so stop putting the blame on me. You were cute first.”

The younger man gasped mock offended, giving Henry a little shove that had him landing on his back. Alex followed him down and positioned himself over his boyfriend. Hovering over him, only held up by his arms on either side of Henry’s shoulders, he looked down at Henry who was staring up at him with a little spark in his eyes. The soft affection from a second ago was battling against a dark hunger, that was ready to come back from earlier.

Alex cocked his head and smiled down at him before leaning in and pressing his mouth onto his boy’s waiting lips.

Henry responded to the kiss beautifully, opening up, giving Alex the space to slide his tongue into the wet heat of his mouth. His little sighs soon turned into needy moans with Alex deepening the kiss and pressing his hips down into Henry’s. His own body bucked up into Alex’s touch, his dick already starting to get hard.

Alex hummed into Henry’s mouth, flicking his tongue just as Henry liked, and rolling his hips faster, the desperation getting the better of him. Damn, he had a plan. The reason for why they were here in the first place.

With this in mind, Alex pulled away with one last kiss to Henry’s pretty swollen lips. The other whined pathetically, trying to chase Alex’s.

Alex tutted and tweaked Henry’s nipple playfully.

“Why did you stop?” Henry grumbled with a pout, his eyes still blown black and shiny with want.

“As I said, dinner,” Alex answered.

“Who needs dinner when I can just eat you?” Henry said while licking his lips.

Alex groaned and threw a desperate look towards the darkening sky. “I swear to God, who let you out of your cage? This is not very princely of you.”

“I’m just saying that we could save you a lot of work if you let me do the work. I for one would love to get to my sweet treat right away.”

“Who’s the menace now,” Alex whined and pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes. Refocusing himself. The plan, Alex, the plan. He gives Henry a look to which his boyfriend just blew him a little kiss. Alex rolled his eyes fondly and leaned back in to kiss the stupid grin off of Henry’s face.

“Do you want to take this inside?” Henry whispered seductively into the space between them.

Alex pulled away and got up from the sunbed, turning back around and offering his hand to Henry. The other smiled and let himself be pulled up as well. By now the sun had completely disappeared on the horizon, the sky now a beautiful mix of indigo, purples and the softest pinks. Not a cloud in sight. Perfect. Alex smiled to himself.

“C’mon then, baby.” Alex said with a nod towards the house.

Once they were inside, Henry was about to make a beeline for the stairs but Alex stopped him by the hand he was still holding.

“Again. Why did you stop?” Henry asked exasperated.

“Well, I never disclosed where I was going once we’d be inside. And I am going to the kitchen to make you dinner. Just as I promised. You can do whatever you want to, sweetheart.” Alex said poking out his tongue.

Henry’s smile from a second before turned into a pout, a small whine escaping his lips. “Mean.” He crossed his arms and looked longingly towards the stairs that would bring them to their bedroom.

“Later, my love. Let me take care of this first and after I will take care of you. Promise,” Alex said while pulling the taller boy back in his arms for another hug. Henry grumbled softly but burrowed close to Alex’s body, wrapping his arms around him.

As they stood there, holding each other close for a moment, Henry’s stomach grumbled softly making Alex chuckle loudly. Henry pressed his face into his boyfriend’s neck embarrassed and shook his head slightly.

“See, baby. Even your stomach agrees with me. And what is that saying? Always listen to your gut. So, dinner is gonna happen if you like it or not,” Alex said into Henry’s hair, swaying them from side to side for a moment.

“Fine,” Henry sighed dramatically, “but let it be known, all of this is happening against my will.”

“Oh, I’m sure, mi amor. You will absolutely despise everything I’m gonna make for you,” Alex said with a serious nod. With another kiss pressed to Henry’s cheek he pulled away from him and walked over to the kitchen.

He grabbed his phone from the kitchen island and connected it to the speaker system downstairs. As the first notes of their highly curated shared playlist filled the room, Alex started to pull out the ingredients he needed for their dinner. He wiggled his hips slightly which made Henry laugh somewhere behind him. Just a second later, the taller boy hooked his chin over Alex’s shoulder to see what he was doing.

“Can I help, dear?”

“You can sit here and look pretty. Let me take care of you tonight, alright?” Alex felt Henry’s body going slack behind him as a soft mewl escaped his lips. This was exactly the reaction he had wanted.

“Sounds nice,” he whispered.

“Go sit over there, wanna keep you close but the oil is gonna be hot in a second,” Alex replied as he started to peel and cut an onion.

Henry hummed and hopped up on the counter, watching Alex intently. “What are you making?”

“Your favourite. Shredded beef quesadillas with guac and salsa verde.”

“Oh, perfect,” the blonde man breathed. And well, both of them knew that Alex didn’t have any time to really cook in the past few months, their dinners oftentimes existing of a quick thrown together pasta dish or more often than not take out. So, him making one of his favourite Mexican dishes that Henry fell in love with after trying it for the first time when Oscar came to visit and cooked for them, showed the older boy that this evening really was about him.

They fell into comfortable silence with Alex humming softly along to the music that was playing in the back. While Alex was busy making the salsa and got the avocados ready, Henry suddenly walked out of the room. The brunette boy threw a worried glance after him but when he heard the soft cling of bottles, he knew what his boy was doing.

Just a moment later, he returned with two bottles of wine in his hands. “Do we think rosé or white? Red is definitely too heavy for this even if the weather would fit the mood. But I cannot decide between these two. Oscar’s wine collection never fails to amaze me. Christ, this man really has taste,” Henry gushed excited. God, he was adorable.

“I think white. I had this one before with my dad. It was really good. And it will go nicely with dinner.”

Henry hummed in agreement, turning back around and walking off again. When he came back, he got them both a glass of wine and started setting the table.

Alex felt how his boyfriend was slowly relaxing more and more, the stress and anxiety that had him in an iron grasp these past few weeks finally starting to loose its grip. Of course, the problem wasn’t solved with a nice dinner and some cuddling in the sun but it had laid out the ground work for Alex’s plan he had created so carefully. He couldn’t wait to show Henry exactly what the reason for their trip was.

When the food was done and devoured by the couple and after Henry had let out the most scandalous and frankly obscene noises while eating, his boyfriend demanded to clean up the kitchen because Alex, you are the one who has been working your ass off these past few months you deserve an evening to relax too. So let me.

Alex had given in, knowing that Henry took great pleasure in taking care of Alex too. And anyways Alex hated doing the dishes. So, a win for both of them.

The brunette boy topped up both of their wine glasses again, before walking over to the fireplace and starting a fire. Staying here during the colder months and being able to make a fire was one of his favourite things. While he loved coming here during the summer and waste the day away at the lake and end it with music, a campfire, and s’mores, the warmth and comfort of a fire in the fireplace was one of the best things ever.

He stared into the flames, thinking about the past few weeks and everything that’s been going on. Of course, the approaching exams were always in the back of his mind and he was worried about passing them but in the grand scheme of things he knew nothing bad would happen if he failed. He might not be happy and he definitely would blame himself but realistically he knew he could just retake them and it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Not that his brain was pleased with this thought but with the amount of faith Henry had in him, could he really say with certainty that he was going to fail?

His thoughts were interrupted as two strong arms circled around his waist in a gentle grip and a soft kiss was placed on his shoulder. “What are you thinking so hard about?”

“Huh? Nothing.”

“I called you three times and you didn’t hear me, dear,” Henry mumbled nosing along his jaw.

Damn.

“You’re worrying about your exams, aren’t you.” Henry said. It wasn’t a question.

Damn. Why did he knew Alex so well?

“Just need them to be over at this point. I can’t wait for Christmas break when I don’t have to think about any of this for two weeks straight.”

Alex could feel Henry take a shuddering breath behind him but before his boyfriend could start apologizing for things that were not in his hands at all, he turned around in the o of Henry’s arms and cupped his cheeks with soft force.

“And before you even start, don’t. None of this is your fault. And coming here was not a bad idea. In fact, I got much more studying done here in a day than the past four days in the city. In fact, I was just thinking how I haven’t felt this relaxed in solid months and I can focus a lot better. So, really this was such a good idea and I am giving myself a pat on the shoulder for this.”

Henry looked at him, still the smallest hint of uncertainty shimmering in his gorgeous blue eyes. Alex stroked his cheek carefully, letting him process and offer a steady presence to really believe him.

“Why were you calling me, baby? Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

“Just wanted to know whether I could interest you in some dessert?” Henry squeezed his hips with a little smile.

Alex cocked his head as a smirk appeared on his face. He let a hand wander down to Henry’s chest and from there down to his bum. “Oh, I would absolutely love some dessert. Would you be interested in helping me lose some of that focus from earlier?”

Henry’s pupils went dark, the passion from before dinner reappearing in a heartbeat. God, he was insatiable sometimes. Alex absolutely loved it.

“I am very much interested, yes.” The blonde man breathed before crashing his lips onto Alex’s. He tasted of the sweet notes of the wine they had for dinner and something so distinctly Henry that made Alex groan in pleasure. Henry’s tongue slipped into his mouth as his smaller hands began to travel all over his body, towards the hem of his shirt to swiftly pull it up and off of his torso.

Not a second later, he started to untie the sweatpants that were already sitting dangerously low on Alex’s hips, pulling them down along with his underwear.

“Eager, are we?” Alex laughed into the kiss while slowly starting to undress the taller man too.

“For you? Always.” Henry mumbled before kissing down Alex’s neck, leaving bites and little marks in his wake. Alex moaned softly, his dick already swollen and heavy. He moved his hips into Henry’s eliciting a delicious moan from him. The grip on Henry’s ass tightened bringing them closer together as the desperation lit them up from within. Both of them were panting heavily, their kiss nothing more than a hungry clash of teeth with the harsh movements of their lower bodies.

Henry broke the kiss and nosed his way down to Alex’s neck hiding his burning face there, licking and biting every piece of exposed skin he could find. The ministrations had Alex nearly lose his mind, his moans getting loader as he finally pulled down Henry’s sweatpants, getting his hands on the bare flesh of his arse.

“Fuck, baby.” He rasped, his hips bucking up, their bulges meeting in a desperate grind.

Henry just whined in response, moving away from Alex’s neck to his chest, taking one of his nipples into his mouth getting it nice and wet while pinching the other between his fingers.

“Dios mio. Fuck,” Alex moaned his own hand travelling between their bodies and taking both of their dicks in his hand, squeezing softly.

“Alex, Christ.”

“What do you want, baby?” Alex whispered.

“Fuck me, please, need you, please please,” Henry babbled in response, his hips moving faster against Alex’s hand.

“Let me take you to bed, my love.”

“No.”

Alex pulled away a bit to look at Henry. “No?”

“Want it…here,” Henry said a small blush painting his cheeks.

Alex’s brain came to a screeching halt. “Here?”

“Been thinking about this forever,” Henry continued while following Alex’s happy trail with a finger, teasing his base and cocking his head when his hand brushed his erection, “and for once, we’re finally alone here. So, yes, here.”

“Fuck, yes. Lie down, sweetheart.”

Henry’s eyes have possibly gotten even darker as he gracefully threw off the rest of his clothes before laying down on the cream-coloured fuzzy rug that laid in front of the fireplace.

Alex cursed under his breath at the view that was offered to him. A naked Henry lying down on a soft cloud in all his glory while the gentle glow of the fire illuminated his skin beautifully. “Gorgeous.” He breathed before kicking off his sweatpants and boxers and kneeling in between the v of Henry’s legs. He moved to hover over his boy, taking his already leaking dick in his hands, stroking him gently.

A breathy moan escaped Henry’s lips as his eyes closed in pleasure. “More, please. Alex, darling, I need you, fuck me, please.”

And who was Alex to deny Henry such a wish? He put his fingers to Henry’s lips and murmured, “open up, angel.”

Henry complied and Alex slid his fingers in Henry’s hot mouth, getting them as slick as possible without any lube in reach. When he deemed them wet enough he pulled his hand back gently moving it down to Henry’s most intimate parts and gently tapping his ass to give him the space to open him up.

When his spit slick finger traced Henry’s rim, he could feel it was still loose and slightly puffy from his tongue earlier, which would make this whole thing a lot easier. Alex smiled down onto Henry whose eyes fluttered open again. “There you are, mi amor,” he whispered before leaning down to capture the other’s lips in a deep, sinful kiss again.

When he pulled back it took everything in him not to groan painfully. He was so hard, and Henry looked positively delectable with the blush high on his cheeks, the hooded eyes, and his beautiful swollen lips.

He held eye contact with Henry as he prepped him, watching out for his expressions, and listening to the soft moans and whimpers spilling from his boyfriend’s lips. Alex could feel him panting against him and it worked him up more and more.

A short few minutes later, Henry cupped Alex’s face, a desperate look in his eyes. “I’m ready, love.” He rasped and licked his lips before pulling Alex’s head down in another heated kiss.

“How’d you wanna do this, baby?” Alex breathed heavily as he pulled away, his dick straining against Henry’s thigh.

Henry stared at him for a moment before he murmured in a low voice, “wanna ride you.”

Alex closed his eyes and suppressed an embarrassing moan, trying desperately not to come on the spot. “Feel free to do so.”

Without another word, Henry switched their positions, as he kneeled over Alex, his thighs bracketing the other’s hips. “We have no condoms here, baby.” Alex said with a frown.

“No. Wanna feel you,” Henry mumbled almost inaudibly, his mind already slipping into a hazy state of pleasure.

“Yeah, of course. C’mere.” Alex beckoned him closer with his hands settling on Henry’s waist. They held eye contact as Henry reached behind himself and was sinking down on Alex’s waiting erection. Both of them groaned at the feeling, after weeks of missing out on being close and intimate like this. It was almost too much. Too overwhelming. It was everything.

Henry’s eyes fluttered close as he started to move his hips, rocking against him in gentle figure eights at first but the pleasure became too much too quick. He threw his head back in a broken moan, his long neck straining with the force he was moving his body, bouncing on Alex’s dick like was born to do so. Soon though, he was losing his posture, his movements turning sloppy as he began to chase his release.

“Fucking hell, baby. You feel so fucking good, so tight for me, Jesus Christ, I’m so honoured to get to have you like this. You’re everything. So beautiful, so gorgeous, and you belong to me. All of you. I get to call you mine,” Alex babbled unconsciously. His mind all over the place as the pleasure was building inside him.

Alex thrusted his hips up to meet Henry’s movements, his hands like vices on Henry’s waist. Henry moaned loudly at the added pressure on his prostate, Alex pulsing deep inside him to a point where speaking seemed impossible.

“Touch me, please,” he breathed in a broken voice, his head thrown back, the glow of the fire reflecting the sweat on his chest. Alex was hypnotised. “Need more, need you, please.”

At Henry’s plea, Alex got an arm around his waist and rolled them over again to get Henry back under him. He grabbed the taller man’s wrists and pressed them into the soft rug above his head while leaning down to kiss him once more. Distracting Henry with the kiss, Alex slid back into his tight heat and began to thrust his hips in a brutal pace. He felt Henry’s body tighten around him in response, his mewls and whimpers getting louder by the second. The moment he found Henry’s prostate again, Henry started trashing on the soft rug. His hands, that were still obediently held above his head, grappled for something to hold onto as a litany of curses and praises spilled out of his mouth.

The sounds Henry made would forever be burned into the back of Alex’s mind and he loved every second of it.

“God, Alex, fuck, yes, right there, please, give me all you got. You are so good. So good to me. You are everything. Thank you for loving me. Right there oh my god,” the blonde man rambled, his eyes screwed shut in pleasure.

Alex knew Henry was close, could tell the signs with his eyes closed, so in tune with his lover. Still, it would never fail to make him tear up with emotion at experiencing the absolute wonder that was Henry falling to pieces in the safety of Alex’s arms. To see how his boy start to unravel beneath him, to see him let go of all the troubles his mind and life sent his way, to just be. Alex would never take this for granted. And he was honoured to be able to give Henry this. This all-encompassing pleasure, this unconditional love, this safe space. It was fucking beautiful. It was everything.

Alex felt himself getting close to the edge but he needed Henry to let go first. It was an almost primal need to have his boy come first. For him to find this calm after the waves of pleasure, to find the release he so badly needed. He picked up his pace again, nailing Henry’s prostate again as he reached between their bodies and stroked Henry in time with his thrusts. The other’s moans turned even more desperate and Alex knew it was time.

“Fuck, baby, always so perfect for me. Come on, let go, come for me, beautiful,” he moaned, his own orgasm on the brink.

At Alex’s words, Henry let out a broken mewl as his body went taut for a moment before he fell apart and came with a breathy laugh on his cherry lips. Alex felt every shivering moment of it and followed Henry’s release just a second later.

After the fog of pleasure had cleared a bit Alex pulled out gently, not wanting to hurt Henry. His eyes found Henry’s blue ones again as they shared a soft smile. Alex’s heart fluttered when he realized that after weeks of increasingly dark circles and small but stressed frowns, Henry smiled at him sleepily but nonetheless genuinely.

“That was perfect. Thank you,” Henry murmured as he lifted his hand and stroked Alex’s hair with tender fingers.

“The pleasure was all mine,” he poked his tongue out, making Henry chuckle softly.

He leaned in and kissed Henry’s lips gently before moving over to his cheeks, his nose, and his forehead. There he stayed for a second and just enjoyed the closeness for another moment before pulling back and starting to get up. Henry looked at him sleepily.

“Let me just get something to wipe you down with and put some more wood in the fire so it won’t go out. We can stay here and cuddle for a bit if you want.” As if he read his mind, Henry nodded happily and laid back down.

A minute later, Alex was back next to him, cleaning the worst of their mess before taking his boy back into his arms. Henry curled into his side, his head over Alex’s heart, his favourite place. The brunette man began to draw random patterns on his lover’s back as he pressed a kiss into his messy hair.

“I love you,” Alex whispered into the comfortable silence.

Already on the brink of sleep, Henry turned his head and pressed his lips against Alex’s skin as he mumbled a quiet, “I love you too.”

The warmth of the fire and the safety of their touch added to the exhaustion of their shared orgasm as both of them fell asleep.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

A few hours later, Alex woke up to Henry holding him from behind, covering his shoulders and his back, shielding him from the world even in his sleep. A strong arm holding him securely around his waist while the other had become Alex’s pillow. The smaller man smiled to himself, the warm and fuzzy feeling of being loved and protected lighting up his body from the tips of his hair down to his toes.

He couldn’t wait to reciprocate this feeling with the grand finale of his little scheme. Alex lifted his head to look out of the large windows that faced the lake and was elated to see that it was in fact a clear night, no cloud in sight whatsoever. Excellent.

Henry was still sleeping peacefully behind him, warm puffs of air hitting his shoulder and if this wasn’t so important he would have loved to lie back down and go right back to sleep.

Instead, he turned around and fitted himself to Henry’s front, chest to chest, his face towards his boyfriend. He loved watching the other sleep because whenever Henry was able to sleep in Alex’s arms or hold Alex during the night he was able to settle down completely. Same for Alex, honestly. But there was something so calming and beautiful to watch the love of his life all serene and safe, his heartbeat calm and quiet. Alex lived for these moments, especially after the months of anxiety, stress, and uncertainty from the beginning of the year.

Too bad he had to disturb him but Alex was sure, he would be forgiven in no time at all.

He lifted his hand up to Henry’s hair and began to play with the soft sandy strands. Henry snuffled in his sleep as he chased the feeling of Alex’s fingers slightly.

Alex moved his hand down to Henry’s cheek, softly stroking his thumb back and forth below his eyes. “Henry? My love, it’s time to wake up.” He whispered into the quiet air surrounding them, the fire having burned out long ago.

Henry furrowed his brows and tried to burrow closer to Alex but the other chuckled softly and moved to sit up. “C’mon, baby, I need you to wake up.”

“Why?” Henry breathed almost unconsciously.

“Open your pretty eyes for me, sweetheart. I’ll explain in a second.”

The older boy grumbled softly, his first real sleep in weeks interrupted by the only person that offered him said sleep. Still, a moment later he obediently opened his eyes and found Alex’s brown ones.

“Is something wrong?” He asked sleepily rubbing his eyes before sitting up too. “You wanna go to bed? Now that I’m awake I realize it is indeed a floor we are lying on.”

Alex chuckled. “No, that’s not it.”

“What is it then?” Henry looked at him in confusion.

“I need to show you something.”

“What do you mean you need to show me something? It’s the middle of the night, Alex.”

Alex poked his tongue out while standing up from the floor and looking for his sweatpants. “I am aware that it is night-time, thank you very much. But this is exactly why I need to show you this now. C’mon, baby, indulge me.”

“Where exactly would I have to go in this hypothetical scenario? I’m sleepy, Alexander.”

“We have to go outside.” Alex just replied while pulling on his clothes. (If he stole the hoodie Henry was wearing earlier it was no one’s business but his own.)

“First you tire me out like this and now you force me to go out into the cold? It’s not summer, and I will not go skinny dipping with you, you menace.” Henry exclaimed resolutely. Not a minute later, he pulled himself up and grabbed his clothes. When he looked at Alex and found his hoodie on his boyfriend, a small smile lit up his face.

“I promise, it’s worth it, sweetheart.” Henry just gave him an exasperated look.

Alex loved how clueless his boy was. All of this made the whole surprise even better.

When Henry was dressed, Alex offered him his hand and guided him to the patio doors and out into the night air.

Outside, everything was quiet and tranquil, the lake lapping gently against the landing. The moon bathed their surroundings into a soft, magical light without hindering the stars to twinkle beautifully in the black sky. Perfect.

Alex pulled Henry along to the landing, the perfect spot for what he needed. An unobstructed view of the stars.

Out here, the air was much colder than anticipated and he could feel Henry shiver next to him.

“Stay here for a sec, I’ll be right back.” Alex pressed a quick kiss to Henry’s cheek before rushing back into the house. In there, he grabbed a fuzzy blanket from the sofa and the bottle of wine they hadn’t quite finished before devouring each other. Back outside, he placed everything on the patio table and quietly went into the shed that was usually used to store their volleyball stuff and the things they needed for the boat. Right now, it also held something very important that would hopefully make Henry feel whole again.

Alex grabbed the little bag and the other things from inside to make his way back down to where Henry was staring into the dark water, his mind a million miles away.

“Watcha’ thinking about, sweetheart?” Alex called out softly, making his reappearance known.

Henry flinched slightly as he came back to reality and Alex had a good idea where his thoughts had run off to. He hoped he could give them some peace with everything he had planned.

The blonde man cleared his throat gently and kept his eyes steadily on the water below them. “Nothing. I’m just tired because some cretin decided to fuck my brains out and then proceeded to not let me sleep and recover in peace,” he tried to joke but Alex knew him well enough by now to know that his mind tried to put the puzzle pieces together without any luck.

“Don’t act like this was some hardship for you,” Alex laughed while draping the blanket over Henry’s shivering shoulders. “Here, baby. That should help you stay warm. I also brought the wine in case you want some.”

“Thank you, love.” Henry answered and tucked the blanket closer around himself. He threw a curious glance over his shoulder to Alex who had set down the other stuff to wrap his arms around Henry from behind. Alex nuzzled Henry’s neck for a second, breathing in the clean and grassy smell he loved so much.

Henry leaned into the embrace and breathed deeply, relaxing into Alex’s secure hold.

They stayed like this for several minutes, enjoying each other’s warmth and the closeness between them, still exhilarated by being out in the open like this despite it being the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere. Still, Alex would never take these moments for granted. And he knew that Henry didn’t either.

“Alex?” Henry asked into the quiet night sometime later.

“Mh?”

“So, what am I supposed to be looking at exactly?”

Showtime.

“Not at…for.” Alex whispered in his ear.

Henry tried to turn his head, most likely furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

“I have no idea what you mean by that.” Henry said flatly.

Alex chuckled and squeezed Henry’s waist soothingly. “You, my dear, are looking for Orion.”

There was a beat of silence where the world stopped for a second. A second in which Henry undoubtedly tried to make sense of Alex’s words.

And then Henry suddenly pulled away and swirled around to stare at Alex with large, disbelieving eyes.

“Alex, what?” He said in a painfully small voice, wringing his hands together. Alex stepped close to him and grasped his hands pulling them apart, intertwining them with his own instead. “What are you doing?”

The brunette man brought their intertwined hands up to his face and pressed several kisses to Henry’s smaller hands. “What does it look like to you? ‘m being here for you, mi amor.”

“I don’t understand.” Henry closed his eyes and swallowed harshly.

“I know you’ve been struggling these past few weeks and I also know you’ve been trying to hide it from me – yes, don’t even try to deny it. But baby, I know you and as much as you want to keep your hurt away from me, you won’t be able to. And I don’t want you to. I appreciate your thoughtfulness so much and admire your will to stand back so I can focus on my exams but, darling, these are just that. Tests. As I said before, if I failed them, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. What would be the end of my world, would be you losing yourself in your hurt and not letting anybody help you. Because I know you and I know you can be a stubborn fucking bastard especially if you don’t want to burden anyone around you, but baby, please, please listen to me,” Alex interrupted himself to take a breath as a shudder ran over Henry’s entire body.

“Open those pretty eyes for me, please?” Alex nudged him and waited for Henry to comply. When the other finally looked at him again, Alex was met with stunned blue eyes and a blush heating up Henry’s cheeks at being called out. But Alex was not done yet. Far from it. He wouldn’t stop until Henry got it into his beautiful, stubborn, little head.

Alex let go of Henry’s hands and crowded impossibly closer, cupping his face softly.

“Are you listening?”

Henry hummed and nuzzled his cheek into Alex’s warm hands. His silent way of agreeing.

“Good job, baby. Now as I was saying, you are not a burden. Not to me, not to our friends, not to our family. I know you’ve been let to believe that you are not to talk about your feelings but we have established months ago that this is utter bullshit. And I also know that you know this. But Henry. It doesn’t mean that this suddenly changes just because I have something on my plate. I am here for you no matter what, alright? I love you unconditionally and on purpose. I love you without any expectations. And I chose to love you every day. Even if I’m in the literal trenches of studying and school, you are my priority,” he whispered into the space between them, moving his hands down to Henry’s neck and making himself taller to press his forehead against Henry’s.

Henry took a deep shaky breath as he let the words sink in.

“You wanna tell me what has been going on that pretty head of yours? I’m quite certain I know what this is all about but I would like to hear it from you.”

Henry screwed his eyes shut again and tried to hide himself away but Alex was having none of it. He pulled his head away and directed Henry’s face to his neck, offering him a hiding place. The taller man settled there gratefully and pressed a small kiss to Alex’s skin.

“It’s stupid, really.” He tried to wave off the whole topic.

“Henry Fox don’t even try, I’m so serious,” Alex mumbled into his ear.

“Fine.” Henry sighed and cleared his throat. “Like can I preface, that I am in love with the brownstone and the life we are building in New York?”

Alex smiled sadly into the darkness. Bingo. “Yes, of course. I would never doubt that. Go on, baby.”

And with that the wall Henry had started to build up again started to crumble. As he stood there in the middle of a winter night under the Texas sky, held securely in the circle of Alex’s arms, everything he had been trying to hide inside himself came pouring out.

Henry talked and talked and talked and Alex soaked every little detail up greedily, absolutely elated that his boy had finally decided to share his pain and let Alex carry some of it.

The more Henry talked, the more his body relaxed, and even as Alex’s neck became wet from warm tears he didn’t pull back. No, he pulled his baby impossibly closer, pressed soft kisses into his hair and hummed whenever he deemed it appropriate.

When Henry’s voice finally faded into nothingness, and his whole body was curled into Alex, the smaller man turned his head and pressed another long kiss to Henry’s temple. “Thank you for telling me, mi amor,” he whispered there.

“Thank you for listening. I know it probably doesn’t make any sense and I’m sorry if I hurt you, that was never my intention…”

At that, Alex did pull away and again forced Henry to face him by placing firm hands on his jaw. “Do not everapologize for your feelings, alright? It might not make much sense to anyone else but to you it very much does, so who could judge you for feeling this way? I might never understand the pain and loss you are feeling and I won’t pretend to do so because it’s just something so vast and unimaginable that someone who hasn’t experienced it cannot fathom it but, Henry, it’s your pain and it is real. And you are allowed to feel it in whatever way you need to. But first and foremost, I am so glad you let me in, that you let me know what you are feeling, because now I can carry it with you. I can try and take some of it and relief you of this weight. We are a team, aren’t we?”

Henry choked on something between a laugh and a sob as he nodded his head once which told Alex he was finally starting to get through to him.

Alex wiped away the steady stream of tears that were falling down Henry’s cheeks and taking another deep breath to calm his own emotions that were threatening to bubble over.

“You called me resilient earlier, but sweetheart, you are the resilient one. After all you had to endure, you still protected your beautiful soul and didn’t let them take away your light. Even if it’s dimmed from time to time and you might struggle to find it yourself, you have never given them the power to destroy it fully. This on its own is already evidence of your strength and resilience. And for the moments in which you struggle to hold onto it yourself, I am right by your side to help you keep your glow. Because Henry, you shine brighter than the brightest star and even if you might forget this sometimes, there are people in your life who never ever let you forget it. … And I know you feel like you’re losing your dad all over again but even if you might not see the stars, they are always by your side. Day and night. They never leave you. Just like your dad has never really left you. Just like I will never ever leave you. We are always there, right here in your heart. And even if I am not able to fill all the spaces in there, I can sure try to love you to the best of my ability.”

Somewhere along the lines of his monologue Alex had joined Henry’s tears with his own, overwhelmed by the emotions that were rolling off his boyfriend in waves.

“Oh.” Henry breathed, his expression a picture of disbelief, revelation, love, and utter astonishment as he registered what Alex had said.

Alex chuckled softly and pulled Henry’s head down to press another kiss to his forehead, one to his cheeks, one to his nose, several along his jaw, until he finally found the pillowy softness of Henry’s lips. Both of them sighed quietly at the soft pressure, revelling in each other and their love. The brunette man knew he needed to give Henry a few moments to let everything settle, the chance of overwhelming him in such a vulnerable state quite high. He just kept him close, let him process, and offer a steady presence just as he had promised earlier.

A short few minutes, or maybe hours who the fuck knew, later Henry pulled away from the kiss and wrapped his own arms around Alex, hugging the smaller boy tightly to his own body.

“Thank you, darling. I- I don’t really, I- Goodness, I-“

Alex just shook his head and smiled softly at his boy. “You don’t have to say anything right now, least of all thank me. I know, baby. And it was my pleasure, but now let’s look at some stars, shall we?”

Henry’s eyes began to shimmer hopefully. “Can we?”

“Of course we can, sole purpose for this trip was to give you an undisturbed piece of sky to go get yourself some guidance and be close to your dad, so that is exactly what we’re doing. And this position is actually the best one to find Orion on the whole property. I looked it up.”

With this, Alex grasped Henry’s hips and turned him around to face the water, the moon now behind them, casting soft hazy light onto the scenery in front of them. On the first glance the sky was just a blanket of inky black but when you looked closer a tapestry of a billion little stars appeared right in front of their eyes.

“Oh.” Henry breathed again, speechless at the beauty that laid in front of them. Alex was just as stunned. He had spent a large part of his life here but he had never realized how incredible the stars were down here. Texas, baby,he thought to himself. New York surely had its perks but it would never get close to all of this. (If he was picturing a house similar to this with a white picket fence and the squeals of bright baby laughter right here in Austin with a ring on his finger and the matching one on Henry’s hand, no one had to know but himself.)

“You still know where to look, baby?”

Henry looked over to him shortly before his eyes wandered back towards the stars. “Yeah. Dad made sure I always had my fixed points where I could start and go from there. He used to travel a lot when I was young and sometimes I was allowed to join him on one of his adventures and for cases like this he taught me these. He said it was important so I’d be able to find him wherever I might end up in this world. It always worked until New York.”

Alex felt a small pang in his chest at the dejected tone in Henry’s voice.

“That’s what we are here for. Forget New York for a second, mi amor, just focus on the here and now. Also, truth to be told, I read up on how to find Orion, watched videos, and tried myself but I absolutely have not been successful so I’m hoping you can help me out here, your majesty.”

Finally, there was a little chuckle falling from Henry’s rose button lips as he reached out and grasped Alex’s hand in his own.

“It is quite easy once you have managed to find your fixing points, Dad always said we should start here,” Henry said while pointing towards a certain direction before diving into a thorough explanation of how to find Orion.

With each passing second Henry became more and more elated, the dark heavy curtain of pain and sorrow lifting itself with doing something that reminded him of his father.

“Oh, Alex. Look, here it is,” Henry gasped before a smile lit up his beautiful features. He tucked Alex closer to himself and grabbed his arm to guide him towards the stars, to guide him where he was supposed to look.

In a soft, gentle whisper Henry explained the different parts of Orion, what they meant, and how they came to be. Alex was entranced by the gentle rumble, his heart filled to the brim with the knowledge Henry just shared something precious between his dad and himself, giving it to Alex, making him part of it, sharing this integral piece, Alex hadn’t known was missing until now.

“It’s beautiful, Hen,” Alex murmured when the other came to a halt, their eyes still trained on the twinkling stars.

“Wish I could show you closer, Orion’s belt has the most beautiful colours when you get a closer look,” Henry replied bashfully.

“Oh, we can.” Alex looked over to him and smiled.

Henry frowned. “How?”

“You might want to look inside the black bag next to you,” the brunette boy nodded towards the black lump on the floor.

Henry bent down and opened the bag, gasping in legit shock when he realized what he was looking at.

“Alex. What am I looking at here?” He didn’t dare to hope.

“Oh this? I think you know exactly what this is, baby.”

“How did my old telescope get here?”

Alex kneeled beside Henry and put a gentle hand on the small of his back where he was hunched over and tracing a shaking hand over the metal object.

“I might’ve taken the liberty of calling Catherine and had her sent it over from Scotland, luckily she was just up there for some business and stayed at your house.”

Henry stared at him with wide eyes. “You called my mum and she willingly got into dad’s stuff to ship this across the ocean?”

Alex nudged him. “Told you, we have your back. All of us. And yes, even your mum, she didn’t hesitate to do this for you. You know, she’s not been in my best books but she was so happy to help. She and Bea made sure it got here safely. There actually are perks to being royal, namely shipping something per express via the royal mail,” he joked, wanting to lift the heavy air around them.

“Oh,” Henry breathed once more, clearly at a loss for words.

“C’mon then, put it up, gotta show me these pretty colours now that you gushed about them.”

“Yeah, yes, sure.” Henry got up and started to assemble the telescope with trembling fingers. “I haven’t seen this in years. I didn’t think we even kept it. Was quite sure that Philipp got rid of it actually.”

If this idiot of prince wasn’t in bloody England right now, Alex might’ve gone over there and slapped his stupid face. Each new thing he learned about this asshole was a reason to like him less.

“I’m glad he didn’t.” He said instead of what he really wanted to voice out loud.

“So am I… Right, let me just adjust the lenses. Get ready to be amazed. It’s one of my favourite things.”

A few moments later, Henry was done and took his first real look through it, his breath hitching once more when he finally got to do what he had always done with his father.

“See? And you didn’t want to come with me. Would’ve missed a chance to see your dad,” Alex teased softly while checking his shoulder, making Henry laugh wetly. The other pulled his head away from the lens and shrugged his shoulders while another tear fell down his cheek.

Alex proceeded to wipe them away, feeling his heart flutter at the smile that was making its way onto Henry’s face. The brunette boy knew these were, in fact, happy tears.

“C’mere, darling,” Henry beckoned him over to the telescope, “you must see this. It’ll blow your mind.”

Alex bent down a little to look through the lens and was met with one of the most beautiful sights he had ever laid eyes on. Not quite as beautiful as the man beside him in all his glory but a close second definitely.

“Oh, wow.” He breathed; Henry was right it really was spectacular.

His boyfriend just hummed in agreement.

When Alex lifted his head back up, he was immediately pulled into his favourite place on earth, namely Henry’s arms.

The taller man pressed his face into Alex’s unruly curls, swaying them slightly on the spot.

“Alex,” he began, his voice small and choked up once more, “I -I wish I could put into words how much all of this means to me. I know you said I don’t have to thank you and I agree, just saying thanks wouldn’t suffice to explain to you what you have done for me here.” He trailed off, letting his eyes sweep over the lake, over the night sky, back to Alex’s face before pressing his forehead against Alex’s to gather his thoughts. Alex gave him the space to do so.

“And I know that I am by far not the easiest person to be around and even when I try to pull myself back to give you the space you deserve and need for your studies, for your passion, for your light, you still put me first. I never thought I would even come close to experiencing something so vast and pure and real for myself but you Alexander Claremont-Diaz keep teaching me better. Every single day I am lucky enough to be loved by you and I am once again realizing how incredibly rare it is to be loved like this, but I get to have this, thanks to you. I am the luckiest bastard on this planet and you make me so incredibly happy. I know you don’t expect any thanks for this but let me just say this. Thank you for letting me share this part of my history with you, thank you for turning it into another piece of our history, and thank you for letting me have something so precious of my past become interlaced with my beloved present. I think I told you this before but before my dad passed, he made me promise that I would look for Orion if I ever felt lost. And for a moment, Orion was not in my reach when I needed it the most but you brought it back to me. My dad always said that if I followed my heart, I’d be on the right path no matter what difficulties life threw my way. And what can I say? My dad was right. A year ago, I followed my heart and decided to give into this devilishly handsome, curly-haired, loud-mouthed American who had quickly become the love of my life and I have never once been on a path that had felt more right. You are my right path, Alex and if I didn’t knew it before, I certainly do now. How could I not when you go to all these lengths just to let me look at some stars?”

Henry interrupted himself, put some distance between them, and shook his head in quiet disbelief. “Even after you stormed a bloody castle for me, this is somehow the most romantic thing you could have done for me. And I really don’t have enough words to thank you for this but … thank you for bringing me a piece of my dad back. He would have loved you so much, and I so deeply wish you two could have met. But given the circumstances I feel like this is as close as it gets and for me this makes all of this even more special. So, so special. You have no idea, my love. I’m just – thank you.”

Alex looked up into the sea blue he loved so much and was overcome with a million different emotions but the relief that he was able to give Henry this, that his plan worked, that the soft, happy glimmer was back in Henry’s eyes was everything to him.

“Stop being so bloody cute, we both have cried enough tonight,” he tried to lighten the mood but failed miserably as another tear rolled down his own face. Traitor.

Henry laughed softly and lifted his hand to gently stroke Alex’s wet cheek. “Thank you, darling.”

“It was my pleasure, Hen. All I wanted was for you to give me a real smile again.”

“Mission accomplished,” Henry whispered softly, a bashful smile lighting up his face.

“Mission accomplished.” Alex declared with a nod, nuzzling Henry’s hand. “So, what would you say to a cup of hot chocolate, some more blankets, and the both of us spending some more time with your dad?”

“Can I get marshmallows on top?”

Alex laughed loudly at that, the fondness and love for his boy threatening to overcome him. “Of course, baby. You can have all the marshmallows you want.”

Henry’s smile became impossibly wider as he clapped his hands excitedly. “Oh good. You know dad and me used to steal these tiny pink marshmallows out of the kitchen pantry late at night when mum was asleep and we ate them while we were looking for new constellations. She never found out but she was always complaining about having to restock. I think she quietly accused Philip but none of us ever came clean to her,” he snickered.

“Well then we should honour your little scheme with having extra marshmallows and whipped cream on top,” Alex said matter of factly, nodding his head resolutely.

And if they stayed out there on the little landing for the rest of the night, wrapped up in fuzzy blankets and each other while watching the stars, with Henry teaching Alex some of his favourite constellations while his dad watched over them, it was no one’s business but their own.

The End.