Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Eijirou would like to argue that one of the worst feelings in the world is getting into an argument with someone and having no idea what you did wrong.

Not in a narcissistic way, of course. He knew he was prone to his own mistakes and shortcomings. He knew he valued things that some people might hate, like hanging out with his friends, or grabbing dinner with his moms, or working out at the gym he /worked/ at on his days off.

He knew those were things that drove his girlfriend up the wall, and truly he tried to mitigate the damage done when he did those things. She was okay with him seeing his moms every other week. She was cool with Eijirou hanging out with the squad, so long as she was coming with to make sure she knew who he was hanging out with. And the gym thing? Well, he just used his hour-long lunch break to get some reps in.

And all of those things were discussed and agreed upon, even though Eijirou had no rules for his girlfriend, Hana, to follow in return.

So truly he didn’t understand why she dumped him. Again. Because it’s sort of a recurring thing at this point. They’re on and then they’re off. They fight and then they fuck. Hana will say the cruelest words and then come back a week later telling him he made it all up, or he took it to heart when it was just useless blabbering out of anger.

He didn’t understand, and it’s been like this for over a year now. Eijirou can’t think of a month out of this year that he hadn’t gotten in trouble and been dumped, only to get whiplash as Hana comes back a week later saying she’ll stay if he tries harder to keep her.

It’s probably not healthy. He should probably call it quits, but he can’t. He doesn’t want to give up on a relationship that took so much stress to make work.

So, instead of wallowing in self pity, like he usually does when Hana called him a loser with absolutely no good qualities, he decided he’d try and make things right himself.

She wanted him to try harder, to show her he really truly wanted her in his life, so what better way to show that then buy her some flowers, and clean up his apartment to make a beautiful dinner for the two of them to share?

“Those are no good,” a voice arose from his side.

Flowers probably deserve some sort of condolence for being a gift that idiots buy when they can’t make their girlfriends happy. They’re beautiful little things, sitting in his calloused, thick hands. Part of him knew they’d be treated poorly by Hana, because nothing was ever really good enough for her. But he had to at least try.

Eijirou sat crouched at a flower shop today, digging through the various buckets of flowers to find the ones that went together nicely for a bouquet.

Honestly he was doing a shit job.

He flicked his eyes over to the side to find a young girl, probably not more than five years old, standing there watching him. She was adorable, like most five year olds, but she had a look to her that told Eijirou she probably had parents that really, really cared about her. The girl’s hair was wound tightly in little braids starting at the top of her head and then splitting off into pig tails of fluffy blonde hair. Her eyes were a piercing red that watched him intently, almost like she truly knew more about this than Eijirou.

Not like it was hard. Eijirou had roses mixed with a bunch of blue flowers, all cluttered together like a train wreck in his hands.

“No good?” He raised a brow, smiling at the young child.

The little girl put her tiny hands in the front pockets of the adorable pink apron she wore before exclaiming, “No good! Horrible idea!”

He laughed earnestly, though a part of him felt a bit let down to know that he couldn’t even pick out flowers correctly. According to Hana he couldn’t do anything right. Maybe these flowers would only make her angrier.

“And why’s that?” Eijirou raised his brows at her.

“You’re supposed to put little flowers around the big ones, like these,” she pulled some small white flowers from a water bucket off to the side.

She really did know a thing or two. Eijirou peered off to the side while the little girl grabbed the flowers from his hand. Where was her mother? Surely she didn’t work here, and surely someone wouldn’t let their daughter wander off alone to a flower shop.

When he looked down, the little girl had made a bouquet that somehow looked nicer than Eijirou’s.

“Huh, it does look prettier that way doesn’t it?” He grinned before grabbing the bundle of flowers.

She smiled, looking up at him once again with those gorgeous red irises. They were so similar to his own, yet there were small flecks of golden orange, making them a little brighter. She was so small, hardly making it to his own shoulders despite the fact that Eijirou was crouched on the ground.

“What’s your name?” The redhead asked. If she was lost, he would never forgive himself for ignoring her.

The little girl seemed to struggle a moment internally, like she trusted Eijirou enough to tell him what her name was, but also remembered the stranger danger rule that everyone preached to their children.

“‘Sumi? You out there?”

A rough, gravely, and somewhat out of breath voice called from the doorway of the flower section. Inside there were house plants, and outside there sat outdoor plants and fruit trees.

“By the baby’s breath!” Katsumi yelled back.

Eijirou had about half a second to connect the dots before the owner of the voice was stumbling in, having pots stacked in each arm all the way up to his face. Eijirou could only make out a tuft of blonde hair and the baggy jeans the other man sported.

“I told you that’s too far out of my sight, you can’t play back here—“

The blonde’s lecture was cut short as a few of the potted plants in his hands started to slide off to the side, obviously not balanced safely and probably causing the man to exert more strength than necessary.

Eijirou was on his feet in seconds, grabbing the pots frantically to keep them from falling. He set each of them off to a table at his side, and as the stack dwindled he came face to face with what he could only describe as—

“Beautiful.”

The words left his mouth before he even realized it, before he even had time to process what that meant and why he’d said it. It had come so easily. Like a knee jerk reaction, like it was second nature to human beings to call this man beautiful.

Those same golden, red eyes that the little girl held were mirrored in the man in front of him, though the man’s were much thinner and more delicate. His skin was soft with faint speckles of freckles from working in the hot sun all day, Eijirou assumed. He was shorter than Eijirou, probably reaching his bottom lip, but what he lacked in height he made up for in toned arms and lean muscles.

“Thank you,” the blonde nodded once a good amount of the pots were taken off his arms and he was able to set the rest down.

Eijirou held his breath, hoping to whatever god was above that he wouldn’t get punched in the face for randomly calling a dude he just met beautiful.

That was normal right? Surely a man can point out another man’s beauty in a totally friendly, bro sort of way. His sweaty hands and clenched jaw told another story though. One Eijirou didn’t have time to dissect at the moment.

An awkward bout of silence passed, before the blonde grabbed the little girl—his sister Eijirou assumed— and pulled her behind him.

Oh fuck. He looked like a creep!

“Oh, no, I wasn’t,” Eijirou put his hands up, a cold sweat running down his spine at the implication. “Like, I was just, /we/ were just.”

One of his hands flailed as he tried and failed to explain that he wasn’t a creep, just a really shitty boyfriend who had no talent and needed help from the dude’s little sister to make a simple bouquet that would hopefully make his girlfriend view him as worthy.

His finger brushed against a pot filled with purple flowers that trailed up a vine— orchids he thinks— and accidentally knocked it halfway off the shelf. He grabbed it frantically, steadying it before he could embarrass himself even more.

For a moment Eijirou really debated leaving the store entirely and basically moving countries.

But then the other man laughed and shook his head. Obviously not impressed with the stupidity.

Even his huff of laughter was perfect. How did guys like him exist? Surely he was what every girl wanted in a man. Maybe when the guy’s little sister wasn’t around he could ask.

“She was helping me with the flower choice. She said these would look nicer,” Eijirou admitted with his head hung low.

The blonde nodded, suddenly interested in the conversation. His brows raised as he took up the flowers from his little sister.

“Good choice ‘Sooms,” the man pulled the flowers closer to his face to inspect them.

‘Sumi? ‘Sooms? We’re they nicknames? The little girl's name was ‘Sumi? This man was strange, a totally different person than the usual people Eijirou encountered around this town.

And yet somehow despite the fact that Eijirou hadn’t even met him, he felt entirely invested in this strange man with cute nicknames for his sister, and beautiful flowers surrounding him.

Eijirou couldn’t help but watch him like an extinct creature reintroduced to the public for the first time. He was admiring him, in a totally normal, straight person sort of way.

In a way that other men often looked at each other and thought ‘wow, how did someone end up so beautifully perfect while I look like a crawled out of a garbage can and just barely brushed my hair for my shift at work’. Totally normal.

“Is it for someone?”

“Uh, my girlfriend. Well, ex-girl friend. We’re broken up right now, but I think we’ll get back together,” he stumbled over each word, suddenly pulled from the captivation the other man lured him towards. “I think.”

“Sounds stressful,” the man offered, though he didn’t seem entirely too interested. He probably asked everyone that question.

“Nah it’s fine. We always do this,” Eijirou shrugged.

That earned him some attention, in the form of an off put face from the blonde, “Right.”

Then he took the blue flowers out of the middle and tried to insert a purplish blue flower.

“Switch these out for these.”

“Wait! Those are cool, I want those,” Eijirou halted the other man’s movement.

“Bluebells? These signify humility.”

“Signify? Flowers don’t have a meaning, you pick ‘em and put them in a vase,” Eijirou crunched his nose in confusion.

He really just needed to get the flowers, go home, make dinner for his girlfriend and then forget about the weird creeping feeling in his chest that this guy gave him.

“Okay,” the blonde shrugged, once again seeming like he couldn’t care less. He handed them back to his little sister, who took them with a practiced hand. “‘Sooms go ask Uncle Deku to tie these.”

Eijirou felt a smile crawl to his lips against his will. What a cute nickname. The blonde man seemed to have many for his little sister, and Eijirou found that despite his rather harsh demeanor the man’s love for the little girl brought out a certain fondness others might’ve missed at a glance.

When the girl left, it was just the two of them. Even the blonde’s aura eluded to such a higher level of maturity, or rather wisdom that Eijirou couldn’t seem to find in his life. Like the blonde was more experienced in living than him.

“Good luck with your ex,” was all the blonde said, before tending to the flowers off to the side.

—

They didn’t work.

Well he wouldn’t say that the flowers were necessarily at fault for the giant fight that happened when his girlfriend got home, but the broken vase on the floor definitely wasn’t a win.

It’s been all but three days.

Three days since he sat in this shop for a good forty five minutes, analyzing each flower, trying to make something wonderful for his girlfriend to come home to.

But she hadn’t come home that night, or the next. When she did finally arrive home, demanding they get back together, Eijirou obeyed and gave her the flowers. For a moment she was happy, for a moment he thought he’d finally done something right. She’d smiled so brightly once they were in her hands.

The problem was what she said after, and how Eijirou reacted to it.

“Hello again,” he announced upon entering the flower room of the shop.

His eyes immediately fell to the little blonde girl, ‘Sumi, if he remembered correctly. She was still in her adorable little pink apron, though today her parents tied it up in a poof of blonde at the top of her head, with tiny star charms and clips at the base. She was watering the outdoor flowers with a small, toy watering can that had been filled, probably by her older brother.

He pretended the goosebumps on his arm arose from the outdoor fan nearby, not because of the mere thought of ‘Sumi’s older brother.

“Hello!” She smiled excitedly when she saw him, running up to him like they’d been friends for a while.

Eijirou was grateful she existed. As pathetic as it was, after the fight with Hana, it felt good to know he meant something to someone, even if it was just a little girl from a flower shop.

“If I didn’t know any better I’d say you work here,” he teased.

He hoped she couldn’t see the puffiness of his eyes, or the way his hair hadn’t been maintained lately and instead sat in a low ponytail exposing his roots that needed major attention.

Eijirou picked up a bundle of what he remembered as baby’s breath, and a bundle of tulips. Then he cuddled with the stems until they were all tangled together as a bouquet.

“What do you think?”

‘Sumi scrunched her nose, “I think you should ask for help.”

As if on cue, her older brother walked inside the flower room. He had dirt all over his apron, shovels in the front pockets, and flower petals tangled in his thick blonde locks of hair.

“Back so soon?” The man raised his brows upon seeing Eijirou.

“Maybe bluebells weren’t the right choice,” he sighed.

If you asked, Eijirou wouldn’t be able to explain why he got that shaky feeling in his fingers when the other man entered the room. He was one of those people who silently demanded the attention of everyone nearby, whether he realized it or not. Eijirou had never been one of those people. He’d never even been able to demand the attention of his girlfriend.

Maybe that’s why she slept with someone else.

“Hm, are you sure it’s the flowers' fault?” The man scrunched his nose, eerily similar to his little sister.

When Eijirou really looked closely, there was absolutely nothing separating the two's appearance, aside from the man’s eyes being much more slender. If he got closer, Eijirou could see the chiseled cheekbones that the little girl obviously lacked. If he squinted he could see the tiny dip in the man’s nose that ‘Sumi would surely develop when she grew older.

Was he close? Eijirou felt like maybe he was too close.

“Any suggestions?” Eijirou cleared his throat, leaning back a fraction to lean against a table of flowers.

The man swung his head towards him with a daring grin, “Oh you're ready for those now?”

And holy shit, he was definitely too close. Had it not been for the height difference, their noses would’ve brushed against each other. Instead he could only feel the man’s breath against his chin.

He nodded breathlessly, begging his face to stop heating up.

The blonde hummed in response, snatching the horrible attempt of a bouquet from Eijirou’s hands and picking it apart. It was relatively silent from a moment, only the sounds of ‘Sumi watering the small pots towards the front of the room, and the green haired man in the house plant section talking to another customer.

“What’d you do?”

The question came quietly, almost like the man knew he was pushing it to ask, though there was still some sort of concern in his voice that told Eijirou he was genuine.

Fuck, what /did/ he do? Why did he deserve this? Why, after everything? After catering to her every need, after pushing away friends and hardly visiting his mothers. After everything he’d sacrificed, what did he do to deserve this?

“When we were on a break she met this other guy and they,” Eijirou chanced a glance at ‘Sumi, making sure she couldn’t hear. “Shared a night together. I was really upset and she got angry that I was upset.”

At that, the blonde dropped his arms, letting the flowers hit the tops of his thighs gently.

“So you’re getting her flowers to win her back?” He asked.

His face looked disappointed. Eijirou hated that. Despite hardly knowing the other man, there was a piece of him that didn’t want to be the one to make him look so unamused.

“No, the flowers are an apology for getting angry,” he admitted.

When he said it out loud, he understood the blonde's confused face.

“Getting angry because she slept with another man in the week that you two were apart?”

Eijirou didn’t have it in him to answer.

Because he knew it was wrong. He knew Hana shouldn’t have slept with someone else after they broke up, if her end goal was to get back together with Eijirou. He also knew that if Eijirou had done that, if he had slept with a girl while they were on a break, he would’ve gotten ripped to shreds by Hana.

“Doesn’t seem fair to you,” the blonde pulled him back to reality.

It’s the first time their eyes have locked. The first time the intense, all knowing scarlet has met Eijirou soft, docile ruby.

“It’s fine. I’m fine.”

He lied. Of course. It’s what he did best. He lied to everyone about Hana. They were awful together and awful apart, and somehow Eijirou had grown comfortable in that vicious cycle. He’d grown used to it.

Until now. Until she slept with another man and demanded Eijirou ignore how hurt he felt. If he thought about it too much, he thought he’d cry again, and he really didn’t feel like crying in front of the literal Angel standing in front of him.

Said Angel must’ve noticed, because instead of asking what the hell was wrong with Eijirou, he let it go.

“So, flowers that say ‘I’m sorry for being upset that it took you four days to get over me’?”

“I guess so,” the redhead shrugged his shoulders.

“You’re in luck! I have just the thing.”

The man’s sarcasm should’ve probably annoyed him, but instead Eijirou found himself laughing.

Maybe it was the beautiful flowers, or the precious little girl and her tiny watering pot, or the friendly green haired man that greeted him when he walked in. Maybe those were the reasons his heart had suddenly started to beat at a normal rate after hours of playing dead at his apartment. Maybe that’s why his lungs finally filled with air after barely working last night. Maybe that’s why his puffy eyes were starting to calm down and for the first time in the last couple days he didn’t feel like sobbing violently.

He followed the blonde towards the front of the store, where he’d spend another twenty bucks on flowers for someone that constantly hurt him.

Eijirou knew it wasn’t really any of those things. Maybe, partially it was all of those reasons.

But he didn’t have it in him to address the real reason, which stood in front of him confident, a little cocky, secure in his place behind the counter.

“You okay?” The blonde asked, not looking up from the register as he rang up the total.

“Ah, yeah, you know. Things are just hard,” he swallowed thickly.

After this, he’d have to go home.

He didn’t live with Hana but she had stayed the night last night after they agreed they’d work on things /again/. Eijirou couldn’t help but dread it. Going home felt heavy, and dark. It felt like crawling back to a grave.

Would it be so bad to stay here? Where he didn’t have to demand attention from the man in front of him? Where he could silently exist, maybe rest his head, or listen to the man’s little sister talk about flowers? Would it be so bad if he chose to stay where he could breathe?

“Hard and bad are two different things.”

Eijirou frowned in confusion, “What?”

“Nothing, I just,” the blonde shook his head, and for a moment Eijirou swore he saw a feeling of apprehension across the man’s features.

“I hope you’re smart enough to know that hard and bad aren’t the same thing. Something could be really hard, like growing plants, but that doesn’t make it bad. Forgiving your girlfriend isn’t that hard, but forgiving her for cheating is bad.”

“You think so?” Eijirou tilted his head.

It’s the first time in a while he’d heard someone actually side with him. He’d stopped telling his mothers what his relationship was truly like after the first few months. His friends never had anything good to say to begin with, but they didn’t give advice, they just judged or reminded Eijirou of how much they hated Hana.

“Sometimes you just need to know when to bail, don’t you think,” the blonde shrugged his shoulders.

There was something there. Something tangled within those words that Eijirou wasn’t close enough to decipher. Something that eluded to the idea that maybe the blonde wasn’t actually as perfect as he seemed. Maybe he’d experienced his own personal hell.

I don’t know who I am without her,” Eijirou admitted.

“I don’t think any of us really know who we are until we’re forced into a mold.”

Was he fitting in a mold? Had he pushed himself into a box, trying to fit a standard for Hana?

“‘Sumi, give him his flowers,” the blonde handed off his bouquet to the little girl that had joined him.

“Thank you, ‘Sumi,” he nodded, though his head felt too full of new information to really move at all. “And thank you, uh?”

“Bakugou,” the blonde— Bakugou— supplied.

Eijirou smiled, “Thanks Bakugou.”

—

Hey! It's you!”

The little girl's voice was becoming quite familiar to Eijirou at this point.

He smiled, trying to hide the genuine excitement he felt upon entering the flower shop.

“It is me!”

“Who are you?” ‘Sumi put her hands on her hips and raised a brow.

Today she wore her hair down, bangs clipped on either side of her forehead with bunnies on each one.

He laughed at the way her mannerism mimicked her older brothers. “I’m Kirishima Eijirou, who are you again?”

“You know me, I’m ‘Sumi,” she giggled. “Are you buying flowers again?”

“Unfortunately I am,” Eijirou nodded.

He really didn’t have to buy flowers. He and Hana had gotten in a fight, sure, but he could’ve gone without the flowers for this one.

Part of him assumed that once again, it’s manly to buy your girlfriend flowers after a fight.

Another part of him, a larger part of him, wanted to come back and see the shop owners.

“Did the other ones go bad,” ‘Sumi asked as she guided Eijirou back to the flower section.

“Yeah, something like that.”

It was practiced footwork at this point. He hadn’t been here in about a week, but Eijirou could remember exactly where the baby’s breath was and he probably didn’t need help from ‘Sumi or Bakugou to wrap a bouquet.

Coming here was a breath of fresh air that had little to do with the copious amounts of plants, and more to do with the wonderful blonde man currently standing in the middle of the flower room. Eijirou wouldn’t exactly call them the best of friends, or honestly friends at all.

But it felt so /good/ to be around Bakugou. He was visiting in the same way he’d visit Denki at the coffee shop, or Mina at the record store she managed. He was just popping in to say hello.

He’s not sure why he had to keep convincing himself of that.

“It's becoming alarming that you're here talking to my daughter again,” Bakugou put a hand on his hip, way too casual for the bomb he just dropped on Eijirou.

“Daughter?” He raised his brows.

“Fucking obviously,” Bakugou frowned before motioning over to ‘Sumi, his /daughter/.

Eijirou had many, many questions but his brain was way too slow to comprehend.

“I thought she was your little sister!”

“Nope, she’s my offspring,” Bakugou generously supplied.

“Y-You’re pretty young to be a dad,” Eijirou pointed out.

He had assumed that the two of them were about the same age, but now he was beginning to question that. If Bakugou had a five year old then he had to be old, right?

“And you’re pretty young to be in a loveless relationship,” Bakugou clapped back.

“Mean.”

“Right back at you.”

Eijirou shook his head, “That wasn’t my intention, I was just surprised! You’re so young. You can’t be more than twenty four, right?”

“I’ll be twenty four in April,” the man nodded.

He was currently tending to a new shelf that had been pressed against the wall of the already cluttered area. Eijirou noted that once again, there was no embarrassment, or shame in the others' voice as he admitted that he was quite young to have a five year old.

Eijirou liked that about Bakugou. He was who he was, and if someone didn’t like or agree with it then that was their problem.

“And I’m five!” Katsumi exclaimed.

Bakugou and Eijirou exchanged a glance for a moment before chuckling softly at Sumi's obliviousness.

The blonde pointed to the other room, “‘Sooms, grab one of the pothos on the bottom shelf.”

Eijirou tried to stay chill about it. The man had a kid and that was fine. Eijirou didn’t really care about that, he really liked ‘Sumi.

“So then, do you have a wife?” He felt himself ask before he could stop himself.

“Nah.”

“Girlfriend?”

“No, Shitty Hair, I have no one. It’s just me and my kid.”

Eijirou wasn’t sure why a rush of relief flooded his system upon hearing that. Was he really that pathetic that he wanted Bakugou to suffer romantically just because he was?

“Sorry,” Eijirou said. “What happened?”

“None of your business,” Bakugou muttered, not glancing at him as he twisted a dead leaf off of his plant.

“Come on man. I’m just now finding out you’re an actual human being and not a specimen sent down from a deity,” he sighed dramatically.

“Very funny, Red,” Bakugou gave him an unimpressed look.

“It’s not funny, it’s unfair! You’re perfect.”

“Shut the fuck up,” he glared, but Eijirou could see the tell tale signs of a blush on the blonde’s cheeks.

He’s not sure why that sent a thrill up his spine either.

“Fine.”

Bakugou grabbed a few flowers and started to twist them together into a bouquet that Eijirou forgot he was purchasing.

“So how are you?” The man asked quietly.

“We’re better, I guess. She’s still mad,” Eijirou shrugged.

“That’s not what I asked. I asked how /you/ are,” the blonde hissed.

“I’m,” Eijirou started but then pursed his lips. No one has asked him that before.

“I'm still really upset, but I’m trying to forgive her.”

“Why?” Bakugou shook his head.

“I don’t know. Because it’s what she wants me to do.”

Bakugou let out a sign as he grabbed the paper liners for the bouquet. “You know, most people would say they’re trying to forgive their lover because they love them. Don’t you think it means something that wasn’t the first place your head went?”

And, well, Eijirou hadn’t really thought of it like that.

But honestly there hasn’t been love in their relationship in a while. Love was something Eijirou had to constantly beg for, or earn. It was something he only got when he bought Hana expensive jewelry, or made grand gestures.

“How’re you so full of wisdom?” He asked, trying his best to change the topic.

“Some people actually call it common sense,” the blonde walked away.

“Mean,” he mumbled before following. “I just want to make her happy.”

“At the expense of your own happiness,” Bakugou added as he walked behind the counter.

“I am happy,” Eijirou lied.

At that the blonde said nothing. He raised his brows, like he was thinking about saying something, but then he started ringing up the total. Eijirou had silently grown to hate the sound of the cash register. The ding of the buttons was a warning that it was almost time for Eijirou to leave the shop. If he stayed any longer it would just be weird.

And he really doesn’t want Bakugou to think he is weird, or annoying, or anything less.

“I know what you’re thinking,” he said suddenly.

“Try me,” the blonde set the bouquet down.

Eijirou pretended not to clam up at the sudden devotion of the other man’s attention. He probably shouldn’t be surprised that someone is actually paying attention to him, but a year with his girlfriend proved that undivided attention was something he’d have to earn through unnecessary standards.

“You think that I should just give up. I should know that this shit is over because she’s stopped trying.”

“I wasn’t thinking that,” Bakugou shook his head.

Oh. Eijirou felt his face start to heat up. Maybe it wasn’t Bakugou that was thinking it. Maybe it was Eijirou.

“I was thinking you don’t deserve to not know who you are.”

Eijirou raised his brows.

Bakugou was talking about the other day, when Eijirou had told him he didn’t know who he was without Hana.

It was so raw, so unscripted. Eijirou felt himself grow shocked at the sheer kindness of the statement itself.

Bakugou cared about him as a person. Not a customer. He cared that Eijirou felt lost.

It made his heart lurch in his chest. He swallowed quickly before licking his lips. Eijirou didn’t know how to respond to that. What do you say back to that? How do you respond to someone that’s telling you that you deserve more?

“Gonna tip?” Bakugou broke his train of thought, shoving a plastic container his way.

“You guys work for commissions?” Eijirou raised a brow.

The blonde twisted the jar to show the paper taped against it.

‘College fund’

“Nah, but I’m trying to send ‘Sumi to university. Help out a single parent,” Bakugou smiled as he handed Eijirou his flowers.

“She’s five,” Eijirou laughed.

He was already grabbing his wallet.

It was strange, the way he already cared about ‘Sumi so much despite the fact that they’d only just met a few weeks ago.

“Gotta start somewhere,” Bakugou shrugged.

“Oh and,” the blonde turned around, reaching for a bundle of flowers. “Here.”

“I didn’t order these,” Eijirou frowned, looking down at the beautiful bouquet.

He shoved a bill into the college fund before picking them up and examining them.

“I know,” Bakugou nodded, only furthering Eijirou confusion. “You buy a lot of flowers, but it doesn’t sound like you’re getting shit in return.”

Holy shit. Eijirou was about to stop functioning. He could already feel how red his face was.

“They’re for me? From you?”

“And ‘Sooms,” Bakugou motioned towards his daughter.

Bakugou gave him flowers.

Bakugou wanted to give him flowers.

“How did you know I’d be coming in today,” he sputtered out a response.

The blonde bit back a smile, obviously trying not to laugh at the blushing mess Eijirou had become.

“Lucky guess.”

They’re just flowers. It shouldn’t mean anything.

But it does. It really really does, because not even Hana has cared enough to put together flowers for him.

“What sort of flower are they?” He swallowed, trying to be normal about this.

“These are azaleas,” Bakugou explained.

“What do they mean?”

“I thought you said that flowers held no meaning,” the blonde raised his brow, obviously teasing Eijirou.

“That was before I met a really smart guy at a flower shop,” Eijirou laughed.

“A /beautiful/ flower shop according to you,” Bakugou scrunched his nose once again.

Eijirou thought he might spontaneously combust.

Bakugou had heard him say beautiful the other day. Thank fuck he thought he was talking about the flowers and not Bakugou’s, very pretty, face.

“Ah, so you did hear that?” Eijirou sighed, trying to play it off.

“I did. I’m glad you think my flowers are beautiful.”

“Yeah yeah,” Eijirou shook his head, trying to change the subject before he’d have to admit that he wasn’t talking about the Flowers that day. “So? What do the azaleas mean?”

“You’ll have to pick up a book and find out I guess,” Bakugou closed his eyes and shook his head.

This guy was such a tease. Eijirou probably looked like such an idiot. A blushing idiot.

“Thank you,” he rolled his eyes despite the giant smile plastered to his face.

Eijirou can’t remember the last time he’d smiled so big.

When he left there was a twinge in his chest. A feeling of some sort of weight lifted off his shoulders, and a stammering in his heart he hadn’t felt in over a year. It was new, something he had no name for. Eijirou wanted to chalk it up to the fact that he’s made a new friend that enjoys his presence, but part of him also knew it was a bit more than that.

Maybe a bit of a crush.

He’d never had a crush on a man before, and was never one to seek out men for relationships. But there was something about Bakugou. Something about the way he looked at him, like he mattered, like he was worth something. Something in the way he spoke to Eijirou like he was a person that deserved to speak. Bakugou cared about him silently, yet Eijirou didn’t have to guess whether or not he did.

They’d only just met a week or two ago, and now Eijirou was walking home with flowers.

When he arrived home he opened his laptop, feeling giddy like a high schooler. Bakugou had said to read a book, but Eijirou couldn’t possibly wait any longer. He typed in the name of the flower, and googled the meaning behind them.

And then he read it over and over. Again and again. Making sure he got each word right. Validating the way his heart broke and rebuilt over and over again. Letting each word sink into his heart and mend together all of the broken pieces.

‘Azalea: Take care of yourself for me’

Chapter Text

Going out was fine. Eijirou didn’t have a problem with grabbing a few drinks after work with good friends, and he definitely wouldn’t complain when Hana had actually allowed him to go out with the squad. With her supervision that is.

The problem was that after the squad had all said their goodbyes at around midnight, Hana insisted they stay out and bar hop. She knew Eijirou had a five am shift at the gym with a woman recovering from a car accident. She knew how important it was for Eijirou to be at her physical therapy appointment.

And yet, she lashed out at him when he asked to go home for the night. It was the same as always. Harsh words and bold claims that Eijirou never treated her right, or gave her what she needed. Somehow, she even managed to bring up the fact that she wasn’t physically fulfilled with him.

So he was at the flower shop again.

Though part of him really didn’t see a reason to come here. What was the point of always doing the manly thing when his girlfriend constantly tore him apart and made him feel awful for purely existing. He knew he wasn’t perfect, and he wasn’t claiming to be. But the constant degradation was becoming a little too draining, a little too painful.

It’s just starting to feel like it’s not worth it anymore.

“Hi, welcome in!”

Eijirou turned his head to the voice a little too excitedly.

But it wasn’t Bakugou.

“Hey,” he nodded to the green haired man that had greeted him.

He’d seen the other man quietly mumbling about in the background of the shop the past few visits, but hadn’t properly met the guy yet.

“Can I help you find anything?” The man smiled. He was shorter than Bakugou, and his hair was much curlier and a deep green.

“No, uh,” Eijirou’s eyes shifted around the shop. “Bakugou and ‘Sumi aren’t working today?”

He hadn’t gone to the shop to see katsuki, he was supposed to be getting flowers for Hana. Yet, he felt a bit disappointed that the other man wasn’t here.

“‘Sumi has school, Kacchan has a later shift.” the green haired man explained. “He just went to drop her off. He should be back in a little while. They just left.”

“Kacchan?” Eijirou furrowed his brow.

This guy must’ve been close to Bakugou to be calling him a nickname. Were they dating? It was fine if they were, Eijirou half expected the blonde to lean more towards men, but it left a rotting feeling in his stomach for some reason.

He wasn’t homophobic, his mothers were lesbian, Sero and Todoroki have dated for years and they’re two of his best friends.

Yet his chest lurched at the implication that Bakugou already had someone else.

“I’m Midoriya. Are the two of you friends?” The man—Midoriya asked.

“No, not really. Maybe?” Eijirou shifted on his feet.

Why did he feel like this? Why was he so disheartened suddenly? He was just getting flowers.

“Sounds like Kacchan.”

Against his will he frowned. Maybe it was jealousy. Maybe he was annoyed that this man somehow got close to the mystery that was Bakugou. He had him familiarized, he’d figured him out.

And Eijirou was just some dude the blonde knew from work.

“Well I’m gonna go,” he faked a smile.

“Okay, see you next time,” Midoriya waved him off kindly.

—

The following week felt like a punishment, not seeing Bakugou at all. He was busy with work, and a painful relationship, and he just hadn’t had a second to walk into the flower shop.

Today he’d gotten called into work early, only to find out his seven am trainee canceled. He had about an hour to kill, which gave him a good amount of time to grab breakfast, or at least a coffee and maybe pop into the flower shop.

At least, that was the original plan.

But when he walked up to the doors of the flower shop, completely by chance, Bakugou and ‘Sumi walked out the front door next to the shop.

“Bakugou!” He shouted, probably a bit too excited.

The blonde turned around with a grumpy glare.

His daughter however, sprinted happily towards him, backpack flopping every which way in her haste.

“Kiri!”

“Hey ‘Sooms,” he bent down to give her a hug.

It had been too long since he’d last heard his sweet ‘Sumi’s voice. She was an instant boost of serotonin. Kirishima had always liked kids, and always wanted some in the future. But ‘Sumi set the bar extremely high for any other child that would come into his life.

“What are you doing here so early?” She smiled happily.

If he was honest, he would say he was here because he hadn’t seen Bakugou or ‘Sumi in almost a week and he missed them. There was something so refreshing about walking into the flower shop and seeing the two of them there, smiling, existing, happy to see Eijirou no matter how much Bakugou acted like he didn’t care.

But he couldn’t be honest and say all that without sounding like a total weirdo, so instead he pointed out the gym just down the road, “I work just down the street.”

It wasn’t a lie, he really did work there, but that wasn’t why he was at the flower shop today. Bakugou seemed to be thinking the same thing as he looked at the gym and then back at Kirishima’s hand on the front door of the flower shop.

“M-My azaleas are dying,” he added after a moment.

He was desperate for something, any excuse to keep talking to the blonde who seemed to be in a hurry. The flowers were dying, yeah, and it was a problem for sure because the petals were getting all over the table in the kitchen, but what was Bakugou supposed to do about that?

Bakugou nodded slowly. He looked sleepy. His hair was messy and he was wearing a wrinkled pair of sweatpants with a baggy shirt, like he’d just rolled out of bed.

“You’re azaleas are dying,” he said again, obviously unsure of what it was Eijirou needed.

“Yes,” he nodded.

An awkward bout of silence passed between them. Fuck, fuck, fuck. What else could he say? Man, maybe he should just walk away and never return.

The blonde let out an annoyed huff when Eijirou didn’t further explain, “Okay if you’re going to be this slow this early in the morning you're gonna have to walk with us.”

“I’m going to school!” ‘Sumi grinned excitedly.

Eijirou nodded. He wouldn’t complain if it meant he could soak up a little extra time with Katsuki.

The man had become a staple in his week. It felt wrong not to see him, or talk to him at least once.

“So, yeah, my flowers are wilting and dying,” Eijirou sped up a bit faster so he could walk side by side with Bakugou and his daughter.

“Okay? What do you want me to do about it?” The blonde shook his head.

Grumpy. Maybe this was one of those, miss your alarms and now you're late to taking your daughter to school days.

“I want to save them. They’re dying,” Eijirou explained.

They were a gift. A nice gift that Bakugou had given to him because he had been thinking of him. Because he wanted Eijirou to take care of himself. Because he cared about him.

And when they died, that meant Bakugou’s hidden request to take care of himself would be rescinded.

“Well they aren’t rooted plants, Kirishima,” the blonde rubbed at his tired eyes, like this conversation was shedding time off his life span.

‘Sumi’s tiny hand reached up to link their hands together until she held one of Eijirou’s and one of her fathers. Eijirou smiled softly at the little girl.

“They don’t grow. Flowers that are cut die,” ‘Sumi told him.

He knew that. Kind of. Well he knew flowers had roots and needed or they’d die, and he knew they needed sunlight. But he didn’t know that bouquets just died. Why on earth would Bakugou give him flowers that just died?

“Oh my god don’t pout,” Bakugou laughed teasingly.

Eijirou shook his head, realizing he was indeed pouting over his dead azaleas.

“I’m not.” He was.

And Bakugou could tell. His face heated up, and he scrunched his nose before turning away. Bakugou just laughed once again, shaking his head. Eijirou thought he could probably die happily knowing he made Bakugou laugh.

“Kiri, you should come to school with me,” ‘Sumi tugged on his hand.

Today Bakugou had pulled the top half of her hair into two little Pom poms on either side of her head and let the bottom half do its thing. Her hair was fluffy like her fathers yet longer.

“I wish I could, that would be so much fun. But I have to work,” he smiled at the girl.

“Where do you work?” She asked.

“I work at a big gym. I help people who want to get muscles, and people who want to heal from an injury.”

Bakugou hummed noncommittally off to the side, “A gym rat?”

“I guess? I manage a group of personal trainers and teach classes on how to train people. I also do one on one physical therapy sessions and of course I train a few customers.”

Their conversations dwindled until the three of them walked in a sleepy silence. Bakugou very obviously hadn’t slept well, if not noticeable in the dark circles then it was definitely noticeable with the way he yawned three times in the past ten minutes.

Being a parent must be hard. Being a single parent must be harder.

“So, how’s your girlfriend?”

There’s probably something to be said over the fact that the first emotion Eijirou felt upon thinking of Hana was dread. They have so much history together. A year is a long time. That’s why it’s so much harder to admit that things are bad right now, and that maybe Hana isn’t what he needs anymore.

Obviously he felt bad about it. They were dating, they loved each other at one point, and maybe Hana still loved him. But lately Eijirou hasn’t been happy. He’s felt nothing but sorrow.

And it’s the last thing he wants to talk about.

“I feel like I only ever talk about myself with you,” Eijirou faked a smile and swung ‘Sumi’s arm in his hand. “What about you?”

“What about me?” Bakugou huffed.

“You’re one giant question mark to me.”

He hated that Bakugou assumed he didn’t care about him. He hated that Bakugou thought it was ridiculous to ask about himself.

It made Eijirou wonder if someone had once told him his identity didn’t matter. Surely someone like Bakugou had so much to offer. He was interesting just by looking at him.

But somehow Eijirou could tell Bakugou didn’t believe that.

“I’m a dad to a five year old and I own the flower shop.”

“Yeah, but that’s not all there is to know about you,” Eijirou laughed.

But the blonde just shrugged his shoulders. Eijirou could practically feel the metaphorical walls the man kept on call raise up as Eijirou approached them.

“Pretty much,” Katsuki sighed.

The rest of the walk was relatively quiet unless Katsuki had to switch into dad mode with ‘Sumi and act like a red fire hydrant was the coolest thing in the world, or explain why two plus two equals four, or why the earth was round and how the ocean didn’t spill off the planet.

When they got to the school, and ‘Sumi walked confidently inside to greet her teacher, Eijirou couldn’t help but feel a tiny twist in his heart. He didn’t want her to leave.

“It’s sort of sad watching her leave,” he admitted.

“Yeah, it never gets easier,” Katsuki kicked at the dirt in the ground with the toe of his converse. “But she needs to make friends and socialize, so this is a good thing.”

It seemed rehearsed, like maybe someone had drilled this into a younger Bakugou’s mind when he begrudgingly signed ‘Sumi up for schooling.

Sometimes Eijirou wished he’d known the blonde when his daughter was younger. He wondered if Bakugou was a stressed first time parent, or a confident one. He wondered if the man had it all together when he was handed a baby at eighteen or if he freaked.

He wondered what happened to make Bakugou do it all alone.

“Why’d you pick the name ‘Sumi? It’s cute but I’ve never heard of it before.”

“That’s a nickname dumbass,” Bakugou snickered.

“What?! I’ve been calling her ‘Sumi for almost a month,” Eijirou screamed.

The blonde shoved him with a grin before they walked away from the school building.

“That’s your own damn fault.”

Eijirou followed quickly, not really sure where they were going, but in no real hurry to get back to work.

“Her name is Katsumi,” the shorter man explained. “I named her after me.”

“Your name is Katsumi?” Eijirou teased.

“My name is Katsuki, idiot,” the other man rolled his eyes and shoved him again.

He’d be lying if he said his heart didn’t skip a beat each time their bodies pressed against each other, or Katsuki’s hair brushed against his chin, or he could smell the soft cashmere vanilla of his cologne.

“Hn, pretty,” Eijirou nodded.

“I guess. A bit conceited of me to name her after myself, but I was eighteen and stupid.”

“I don’t think it’s stupid. I think it’s really cute actually.”

This was foreign territory. They hardly got into when his daughter was born. It seemed like a sensitive subject to discuss over flowers at the shop.

“Was it hard?” Eijirou asked softly. “Being handed a baby at eighteen and realizing you were supposed to be a dad now.”

Another bout of contemplative silence passed over the two of them. It wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable, but more so a moment of processing. Everything Katsuki told him was well thought out, practiced. He was secretive about his personal life, which Eijirou respected.

But somehow it brought an air of worry to him as well. What made Katsuki so guarded? Was he hurting?

“It was what it was.”

Eijirou nodded. Once again, a vague answer which could only lead Eijirou to bad thoughts. He knew what it was like to be hurt by someone. He didn’t wish it on Katsuki.

“What happened to her mother,” he asked softly.

He hoped it didn’t come off as prying, because honestly that’s not what he wants to do. Eijirou doesn’t need to know what happened to Katsumi's mother. He’s not dying for the thrill of the other man’s drama.

But he wanted to help if he could. Or perhaps, take some of the weight off of Katsuki’s shoulders and hold onto it for a while.

“Katsumi doesn’t have a mother,” the blonde shook his head.

It was such a blatant lie, but Eijirou didn’t want to press any further. Obviously there was someone involved with him, in order to create Katsumi, but the blonde wasn’t ready to talk about her, and Eijirou would respect that.

Something terrible must’ve happened.

“Can I ask you a question?” He changed the subject.

Katsuki sighed, “You always do.”

“Are you and the guy from the flower shop, like, a thing?”

At that the blonde let out a surprised scream, freezing in the middle of the sidewalk like Eijirou had just called him a slur.

“Ew! Deku?! Fucking ew! Why would you ever put that image into my mind!”

Eijirou sputtered, putting his hands up in surrender, “He called you Kacchan the other day.”

The blonde's face contorted into disgust, “He’s like a brother to me. A horribly annoying, muttering, overbearing brother that you’re forced to hang out with!”

“Okay now you’re getting dramatic,” Eijirou chuckled.

Katsuki shook his head angrily, pointing his finger at him accusingly, “No, you just insinuated that I fuck Deku.”

They were slowly drawing attention from onlookers. They probably looked crazy, screaming at each other at seven in the morning. He half wondered if it looked like a lovers quarrel.

Eijirou grabbed the blonde's finger and pulled them both forwards, giggling when the blonde stumbled into his chest momentarily, “No, I asked if you two had a thing.”

The smaller man tried to pull his hand out of his grip, “No! And when the hell did you see Deku?”

“What?”

The blonde escaped his grasp with a celebratory smirk, “You said Deku called me Kacchan the other day. Why were you with him?”

“I went to the shop earlier this week,” Eijirou shrugged his shoulders. He didn’t mention that he left as soon as he noticed Katsuki wasn’t there because honestly he isn’t entirely sure what to make of that yet.

“For what?” The blonde raised a brow.

“Flowers.”

“Well, /no/, I’m not fucking Deku. I would rather pull out each individual tooth in my mouth before doing that.”

He rolled his eyes at the other man. There was truly nobody else quite like Katsuki in this world.

“Jesus you’re intense,” Eijirou laughed. “So then you’re single?”

“I don’t date.”

He’s not sure why this pulled his attention so much. Eijirou guessed it was because Katsuki seemed like a guy everyone wanted a chance with. He found it incredibly hard to believe that Katsuki wouldn’t date at all. He was social, sort of, in a cute angry cat sort of way.

“Why?” He asked in a more serious tone.

Maybe Eijirou was crazy, but he could feel like the prior goofy mood turned into something a little more cynical at the question. The blonde shook his head and shrugged his shoulders, seemingly growing agitated, like maybe this was a conversation he had over and over again.

Or maybe it wasn’t. Maybe that’s what was causing his discomfort.

Maybe there was something more. Some sort of information that Eijirou was missing.

“Because I have a five year old who needs me more than some guy needs to get his dick wet.”

He reeled back a bit at that.

What a terrible way to look at relationships.

“It’s not all about sex you know,” Eijirou tried, putting a smile on his face to try and lift the mood.

But even he felt a bit crushed for reasons he couldn’t explain.

Eijirou loved love. He loved being in love, he loved loving. He was what his moms would call a hopeless romantic. Perhaps that’s why he’d always gotten himself into bad relationships.

And he’s not sure why his heart ached when Katsuki said what he did. Maybe it was because he felt bad for the man. Like he was missing out on a wonderful experience.

“With men it is,” Katsuki muttered.

There was so much tension in those words that Eijirou could tell something must’ve happened to make him that cynical.

“With /bad/ men maybe,” he said softly, turning to face the blonde as they continued their trek home.

Katsuki met his eyes for a moment, and Eijirou swore he could see something in them. Something akin to relief with a heavy hint of stress as well. Like the blonde was thankful Eijirou had figured it out without him having to dig into it, but also nervous that at some point Eijirou would ask for more details.

He let out a heavy sigh and turned away, “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Why do you care anyways?”

Eijirou didn’t have an answer for that.

Honestly he was still trying to figure that out himself. He cared about Katsuki in a way that he’d never cared about someone. They only met a few weeks ago and somehow the blonde is at the top of his list. He wanted Katsuki to be happy. In fact Eijirou craved it for the other man.

But he wished for all of his friends happiness.

The difference is, Eijirou wished to be a part of Katsuki’s happiness as well. He doesn’t know how, and hadn’t quite processed what that entirely meant, but he knew he wanted that.

“I don’t know, you’re so good at giving advice, I assumed you must’ve had experience,” Eijirou said instead.

It’s not like he could outright say that.

Subconsciously he knows what that means. The fact that he can’t say how he truly feels towards the blonde probably meant more than he’d let himself believe.

It’s probably for the best that he did, because somehow it seemed Eijirou had upset Katsuki with the question and effectively tightened the bar wire wound cautiously around the blonde’s heart.

“I don’t want to talk about this,” he said quietly.

And when he said it Eijirou could’ve sworn it sounded more like the smaller man was begging, which was something Eijirou never wanted Katsuki to have to do with him.

—

Eijirou wasn’t entirely sure where he was going. His eyes were spilling so many tears, and his chest was heaving so hard that he honestly couldn’t think about anything else other than getting out of that apartment.

He clutched the picnic basket in his hand tightly, not caring when the food inside jostled every which way, or the basket scraped the walls of the stores he passed.

Everyone had a breaking point. Eijirou was notorious for being one of the most patient people on the planet but even he had a breaking point.

And he thinks tonight might’ve been just that.

He let out another sob as he swung open a door, and frantically pushed himself inside the shop.

“Hey— Eijirou! Hey, what’s wrong,” the voice was familiar, but his brain was moving on autopilot. He didn’t even entirely know what his plan of action was, he just knew he wanted to leave Hana’s house.

“She’s so fucking mean,” he choked out.

Before he could say anything else, two strong hands grabbed his shoulders to steady him. After blinking a few times, he could make out Katsuki’s very concerned face.

He’d gone to the flower shop.

He’d gone to Katsuki.

“Who? Who is so fucking mean? What happened?” The blonde asked desperately.

At that moment, Eijirou felt robbed.

Because Katsuki was looking at him with so much concern, so much worry despite the fact that Eijirou just barged in on a random Thursday afternoon. His hands held him up even though all he really wanted to do was sit on the ground and cry. Katsuki held him there, worried about him, asking what was wrong and what happened.

And Hana, his girlfriend, the one who’s supposed to worry about him, the one who was supposed to love him more than anything else had just torn him to shreds over a picnic date.

“My girlfriend,” he sobbed, squeezing his eyes shut.

He’s sure his face looked hideous. He hated when he cried. Hated how he looked so pathetic.

But he couldn’t help it after what just happened.

Eijirou had planned an entire picnic date. He’d made his own food all morning, bought an expensive fruity drink he knew Hana liked, found a special lake area next to the city’s famous butterfly preserve, and gotten a blanket from his mothers for the picnic.

And Hana had absolutely hated the idea.

“Come here,” Katsuki said softly, so soft that Eijirou almost questioned if it was actually the blonde man he’d known for a little over a month.

The smaller man reached up and wrapped his arms around Eijirou’s shoulders, pulling him down and resting his face in the crook of his neck. He was sure he was getting tears and snot all over the blondes shirt.

God he was pathetic. Acting like a child in front of a man who actually had a child.

But he couldn’t pull away. Even if he wanted to.

Katsuki smelt sweet, like vanilla and flowers, probably because he worked in a flower shop. His shoulders were strong as Eijirou cried into them, and his hand ran through Eijirou’s hair like he was the most delicate thing on the planet.

They stood there for what felt like an hour, but probably only lasted a couple of minutes.

Eijirou can’t remember the last time someone held him like this to comfort him. Hana certainly didn’t seem to focus on making him feel good about anything.

“What happened?” Katsuki’s voice buzzed against Eijirou’s cheek which he leaned against the man’s shoulder.

Luckily the shop was empty, and Midoriya was nowhere to be seen. Katsuki seemed to be the only one here right now. Thank god, because it probably looked a bit obscure to see Eijirou’s hulking frame leaned down against Katsuki’s much smaller one.

He squeezed his eyes shut as he recalled the events that just took place.

‘This is going to be so miserable. You know when we split I fucked a guy who took me to the /city/ afterwards. Maybe I should’ve stayed with him.’

That’s what she said to him.

That’s what his /girlfriend/ had said after throwing a tantrum about the date idea. She thought it was stupid, and too hot, and there’d be too many bugs. She hated the idea.

And that would’ve been fine. He had understood that she wasn’t an outdoorsy person and had offered to take her out to dinner and just forget about the picnic.

But then she said that.

She said she should’ve stayed with the man she slept with when the two of them were separated for a week.

“I was trying to do something nice. I made a homemade picnic and tried to take her out, but she didn’t like it. She just got mad at me for not taking her to a restaurant,” he mumbled against the blonde's shoulder.

Eijirou wished he could stay here, hidden in the other man’s shoulder for the rest of his life. He wished he could shrink down and hide here.

Katsuki rubbed his back, soothing him in a way Eijirou never expected.

“Im sorry, thats fucking annoying,” he sighed, shaking his head in disappointment.

“What made you come here?” Katsuki asked, wiping the tears from Eijirou’s face.

He didn’t have an answer.

Why did he come here? In his haste to get away from pain, why did he run to Katsuki?

They weren’t friends like this. They didn’t hang out. He bought flowers for his girlfriend from Katsuki and then left. That was all.

So why’d he come here?

Katsuki ran his hands down Eijirou’s shoulders and arms until they reached his hands. He gave them a firm squeeze, but his lips sat pursed. Eijirou wondered what he was thinking? Did he make him uncomfortable?

“Here, I’m on lunch until ‘Sumi gets home from school. Come with me,” the blonde said as he pulled Eijirou towards the back of the shop where a door sat.

When he opened the door it led to a wooden staircase which they followed until they were on a rooftop.

Eijirou reeled back at the setting in front of him. “This is amazing.”

The rooftop of the flower shop was a garden. There were large hedges hiding the windows from onlookers on the outside, tangled vines crawling up large trees which left shaded areas on soft grass and beautiful stone walkways. Flowers danced at his feet in different colors, a small fountain off to the side trickled into his ear drums.

Katsuki continued to walk to the center of the garden, turning around only to agree with Eijirou.

“Yeah, the earth is pretty fucking crazy.”

So nonchalant, as if this wasn’t a fucking oasis. A safe haven. Maybe even heaven.

“Did you do all this?” Eijirou followed him deeper into the fortress, clutching his picnic basket tightly so he didn’t hit any of the beautiful plants nearby.

“Got nothing better to do,” the blonde shrugged.

“Holy shit,” was all Eijirou could say.

If the other man’s goal was to distract Eijirou from his prior heartache then his mission was accomplished. It was like all of the tension in his shoulders dispersed the deeper he got. The only thing that snapped him out of his daze was the blonde himself, as he pulled the basket out of his hands and grabbed the picnic blanket out.

Eijirou bit his lip, waiting for the judgment to come. He borrowed the picnic blanket from his moms, who said they’d used it on their first date, but to a normal eye it just looked like a tattered quilt. Not only that, but the food was probably subpar. He was no chef, but he knew how to make sandwiches and lemonade, and could cut fruit.

Katsuki took all of it out, laying the quilt down on the grass and then started to organize the food.

“Well let’s eat,” he glanced up at Eijirou expectantly.

“Huh?” He stared down awkwardly.

“Come on, don’t let the lunch go to waste just because you’re girlfriend is a fucking bitch,” Katsuki unraveled the sandwich from its paper wrapping.

He wanted to eat with him. Eijirou didn’t know what to make of that. He didn’t say anything about the quilt or food like Hana had. Katsuki didn’t really say anything at all.

“Don’t say that,” Eijirou mumbled as he dropped to his knees.

Hana was mean, but he wouldn’t call her a bitch. It wasn’t manly.

“Why? She made you cry. You came to me hyperventilating,” Katsuki frowned before taking a giant bite out of the sandwich.

Eijirou shrugged awkwardly before unwrapping his own food. “I don’t know. She’s my girlfriend. I think.”

Honestly he wasn’t sure at this point. He felt like a failure, a total let down. Hana was unhappy with him, and honestly he was unhappy with himself.

Because none of this felt worth it anymore. He was /sad/ with Hana. He spent more time crying than anything.

He was upset that he wasn’t man enough to hang in there or tough it out.

Katsuki sighed and Eijirou pretended he wasn’t terrified of disappointing yet another person.

“Can I say something that might be totally weird,” the blonde asked, staring down at his food.

“Of course,” Eijirou nodded.

The man bit the inside of his lips and stared at him for a long time, once again thinking calculatedly. Everything Katsuki said was well thought out. He was so unlike Eijirou, who said exactly what he was thinking when he thought it.

“Would you let someone treat Katsumi the way your girlfriend treats you?”

Eijirou’s eyes widened.

He hadn’t realized it would be that sort of question.

“No. God, no, I couldn’t stomach that,” he said immediately, because it was the truth.

The mere thought made his heart spiral. ‘Sumi was such a sweetheart, but beyond that she was Katsuki’s child. And he knew that if someone hurt ‘Sumi they would be hurting Katsuki too.

“And why’s that,” the blonde asked.

“I-I dunno,” he lied.

Of course he knew why, but like hell would he admit that to Katsuki.

“I know you know. Tell me why.”

Fuck, he read him like a book.

How do you tell someone you care about their child so much because it’s an extension of them? He can’t possibly tell Katsuki that with how easily the blonde folds under the pressure of revealing any part of himself.

“She’s yours,” he gestured towards Katsuki, as if he didn’t already know Katsumi was indeed his child.

Katsuki let out a chuckle in response before Eijirou continued.

“She’s the tiny little human that you worked so hard to give a good life to. I wouldn’t be able to stomach someone coming in and undoing all of the confidence, or happiness, or experiences you’ve given her. I wouldn’t want to see her so broken down and I wouldn’t want to see the grief it would put you through either.”

The wind accompanied by the trickle of water from the fountain nearby was the only sound to fill the silence. Katsuki stared at him the same way he always did, like there was so much he wanted to say but couldn’t. Like he was calculating, thinking critically about what all of this meant.

“Okay,” the blonde swallowed the bite in his mouth, and brushed his hands off on the picnic blanket.

Then he crawled over to Eijirou until they were close, so close, too close.

And then his hands were cupping either side of his face, and— oh god his hands were soft yet calloused— and he smelt so sweet when he was this close.

“What are you doing?” Eijirou asked breathlessly.

He wasn’t sure what outcome he wanted. His heart was racing, his mouth was dry, and yet he was leaning in, craving it, whatever /it/ was. His eyes bore straight into his own. Those wonderful scarlets are full of so much emotion, so much experience, so much life that Eijirou had never even gotten a chance to live half of.

“Eijirou, /you/ are somebody’s baby. Some mother held you dear, and raised you up to be a wonderful human being. And right now, you’re letting someone come in and fuck up everything your mom worked so hard to instill in you,” Katsuki smiled, like what he was saying was the easiest concept to ever grasp.

And maybe it was. Maybe Eijirou was an idiot for not connecting those dots. His face heated up, and suddenly his limbs were made of jelly.

He called him Eijirou.

The redhead didn’t know his own name could sound so perfect on someone else’s tongue.

He wanted to focus on the fact that Katsuki was right. That his mother did work so hard to bring him up to be happy, and kind, and respectful.

Yet all Eijirou could do was stare at the person in front of him, with his breath caught in his throat, and his shoulders tense and unmoving.

Katsuki was a sight for sore eyes up close, and he’d soak this feeling— the feeling of being the center of the blonde’s attention— for the rest of his life.

“You can’t stomach seeing Katsumi go through it, but you’re totally fine with going through it?”

Yes, Eijirou wanted to say but his mouth can’t seem to form words. He didn’t know why he stayed with Hana other than the fact that they’d grown used to each other. There was familiarity between them, and the promise of somewhat intimate human interaction when they were together.

“I guess I’ve been trying to make it work for so long that it just became a new normal for me,” he shook his head in admission.

At that Katsuki sat back on his heels, dropping his hands from Eijirou’s face. It immediately felt cold without his skin on Eijirou’s own. He missed it already.

“I get that.”

Eijirou frowned, “You do?”

For a moment the man looked like he’d been caught. Like for a second, just a tiny, millisecond, Eijirou had infiltrated Katsuki's well guarded heart and taken a peek inside. The blonde’s gaze shifted to the side as he brought a hand up to his ear to fidget with the earring there, probably hiding the anxiety that came with opening up.

Eijirou hated that, but he could only express it through gritted teeth. Who made him feel like he had to do that? To hide his emotions?

“You’re the one always assuming I have experience in this shit. Don’t act shocked now,” he mumbled.

That brought on a whole new set of emotions Eijirou wasn’t ready to process.

Because it was different when it was Katsuki.

Knowing that Katsuki had been hurt in the past made him want to find whatever person did it and kick their teeth in.

He wondered who it was that cut Katsuki open and tore everything out of him until he was as closed off as he is today. The description was violent, but that’s the only way Eijirou could imagine it. Someone like Katsuki didn’t get broken down by words like Eijirou did. People like Katsuki got their hearts torn out, against their will.

Somehow he knew Katsuki had been hurt pretty badly before. He can see it in the way that he looks at his own child, with so much love yet so much fear that the world will do to her what it’s done with him.

There’s nothing more he wanted to do than ask, but he’s slowly realizing that’s not how Katsuki is. He isn’t the type to share anything about himself, and he certainly isn’t the type to over share, or lay himself out for others to poke and prod at.

Unfortunately this conversation had nothing to do with the blonde, and Katsuki would make sure it stayed that way regardless of Eijirou’s curiosity.

“I don’t think I know what to do with myself if I’m not fighting tooth and nail for love,” Eijirou sighed.

One day, he promised himself. One day Katsuki would be comfortable enough to open up to him, Eijirou would make sure of it.

“Take a break from it and see how it feels to just, fucking I don’t know, exist,” the blonde shrugged. “I’m no good at the love shit either. I’ve taken a five year break.”

“Really?” He felt like a broken record with the way he kept asking Katsuki to repeat himself.

But he just can’t fathom it. Sure, Katsuki was human but how did this happen? How could someone hurt Katsuki?

Eijirou couldn’t explain why he felt so protective over Katsuki.

“Yeah. Fuck that. Focus on something else. Something that doesn’t cause so much Fuckin heart ache. Something that feels easy,” Katsuki picked at the sandwich.

“Like what?”

“Like, I don’t know, eating this sandwich,” the blonde threw his hands forwards at the food on his plate.

When his eyes flicked up at Eijirou’s they both couldn’t help but laugh.

“Shit, sorry. I’m no better than you,” Katsuki ran his fingers through his soft blonde locks and Eijirou could only stare in awe at the way hair could grow so perfectly from someone’s scalp.

The redhead shook his head as he laughed.

How strange. Feeling emotions normally was so… strange. Eijirou knows it shouldn’t be. He should be able to feel things normally, but ever since his relationship with Hana, he had gotten so used to keeping everything at bay.

Laughing, crying, being angry, being scared, being /hurt/. It had all been pushed down, told to simmer and fester until it ate him up inside.

But sitting here with Katsuki, on a cheap blanket and a poor excuse of a picnic, in the beautiful garden Katsuki had created. The wonderful oasis encapsulating Eijirou’s existence.

He felt like he could just exist.

He could laugh, he could cry. Eijirou could vent and Katsuki would listen. And maybe that’s the bare minimum. Maybe Eijirou had just gotten so used to half living that now any emotion fully felt seemed like a landmark.

Or perhaps he was in love with Katsuki Bakugou.

His brain comes to a screeching halt after that thought.

“I brought ‘Sumi back!”

The man with the green hair— Deku, Katsuki’s childhood best friend or possible enemy. Eijirou wasn’t entirely sure yet—opened the door to the garden and in scampered the sweetest human being he’d laid eyes on.

Katsuki raised a hand to his mouth, shouting, “I’m on lunch.”

Once ‘Sumi saw the visitor in the garden she gasped loudly, an excited look plastered on her face as she sprinted over to the two of them.

“Kiri! Kiri, you’re here!” She screamed as she lunged into Eijirou’s arms, wrapping her arms tightly around his muscular frame. Her tiny hands barely touched when wrapped around his shoulders.

Somehow seeing Katsumi now, after the realization that Katsuki had somehow been burned in his past, made Eijirou protective. Like ‘Sumi was a piece of katsuki’s peace that needed to be protected in this lifetime.

“Daddy, look,” the little girl pulled her arms from Eijirou’s neck and held out the small plant in her hands.

It was only a small sprout, with a bit of dirt at the bottom of a cut up egg carton, but she held it with so much pride.

“A bean sprout,” Katsuki raised his brows, showing off those gorgeous scarlet eyes once again. “Show Kiri.”

Eijirou feigned the same interest Katsuki had as well, raising his brows, smiling wide despite the fact that he’d been crying an hour ago.

“Wow, how cool. It’s small.”

“It’s sprouting. It still needs time to grow. My teacher says they’ll grow big and tall!” She explained, letting her father pull her backpack off and dig through the papers she had shoved inside.

“Are you excited? I’m excited,” Katsuki smiled.

Eijirou bit his lip as he watched. Katsuki would /never/ talk like this in front of anyone else. All kind excitement and lack of curse words. He sounded like Eijirou’s friend Mina.

“Me too! Can we plant it in the garden,” the little girl asked with a smile.

He isn’t sure why, but there’s a tug in his heart at the little girl's question. Like the familiar pinch of fear entered his chest as the little girl asked for something she would be denied. Surely Katsuki wouldn’t let ‘Sumi put her plant in his fucking oasis. He’d deny the girl of a space in his wonderful world, and tell her that her tiny little bean sprout wasn’t enough for the garden.

But he didn’t.

“It’ll need a pot first. Find a spare pot to plant it in and we’ll leave it here,” Katsuki nodded.

Why’d he expect otherwise?

Had things really gotten so bad in his life that he assumed any request to be denied, any idea to be shot down?

The two stood, leaving Eijirou with his sudden epiphany and his soggy sandwich.

He didn’t get to think about it for too long though, because all too soon Katsuki was back with a shovel and a bag of fertilizer.

“Here ya go,” he grunted, dropping the bag in front of him.

“What?” Eijirou stared up at him.

“Go help.”

“What?” He repeated.

“Go help my daughter plant her god damn bean sprout,” Katsuki pointed towards the thick plants and hedges of the garden. Ah, there’s the familiar sarcasm and curse words Eijirou had missed.

He stared at the shovel being handed to him before shaking his hands, “I don’t know how! What if I mess it up!”

“You find a pot, pour some dirt, and shove it in,” Katsuki laughed, as if it was simple.

But it wasn’t. What if he tore the roots, or broke the pot, or dropped it, or over-watered it? What if he ruined everything?

Would Katsuki get angry at him? Would Katsumi cry? Would they yell at him and kick him out of the garden? His hands were getting sweaty just from the thought.

“I’m gonna mess it up,” he croaked.

Could he be more pathetic? Scared to plant a bean sprout? Fuck, Hana really left a mark on him.

The blonde must’ve noticed the unnecessary stress climbing through his brain. He bent down, crouching in front of Eijirou.

“If you mess up, it’s okay. We’ll just fix it,” Katsuki nodded.

And it was in that same gentle voice he used on Katsumi sometimes. That same, gravelly, soothing tone he used when he really wanted the words to stick. Like Eijirou was something he wanted to protect from this world as well.

Gods, he loved him.

How’d this happen? How’d Eijirou let it happen?

It wasn’t slow, it happened fast. He met Katsuki and fell. His heart was scraped up off the floor by warm, calloused hands and treated so tenderly, given attention, by Katsuki.

But Katsuki didn’t do relationships. He showed absolutely zero interest in them, in fact he showed negative interest in them. He hated the very idea of it and shot it down immediately.

In an attempt to flee from the sudden revelation he stood from his spot quickly and left Katsuki to instead find his daughter.

“I want this one,” the little girl pointed at a speckled pot.

It was blue, and heavy, with white flakes baked in.

“Let’s do it,” Eijirou nodded.

He tried his best to plant ur, though he can confidently say he’d never planted something in his life. He didn’t particularly enjoy dirt. Eijirou pressed the tiny bean sprout in, smiling when ‘Sumi crouched down and watched with those same dazzling scarlet eyes.

“Not too hard. It’s my baby bean sprout,” she raised her brows when he gave a rather aggressive press into the dirt.

He couldn’t help but let out a huff at the deja vu.

Like Katsuki had said moments ago, Eijirou was his mothers baby, Katsumi was Katsuki’s baby, and the bean sprout was ‘Sumi’s baby.

Even this bean sprout was someone’s treasure and deserved to be treated kindly.

Why’d he let Hana treat him less than his mothers’ treasure?

Eijirou swallowed thickly but smiled at the little girl as she leaned against his thick shoulder.

“Looks perfect, we’ll put it near the window so it’ll get sun,” Katsuki’s voice looked above him. When Eijirou turned the man was leaning over the two of them.

“What’s it gonna do?” ‘Sumi asked.

“Well it’s a bean sprout, so eventually beans will grow,” Katsuki explained.

“Beans? That's not cool at all,” the little girl scrunched her nose.

Eijirou expected laughter, but instead heard Katsuki click his tongue.

“Hey, don’t be mean. Everyone has a purpose, and this guy’s is to make beans for people to eat. One day you’ll find a purpose, and you won’t want people to be mean if they don’t like it.”

He couldn’t help but wonder what else that meant. Surely it didn’t only apply to bean sprouts. Eijirou wondered if someone had done that to Katsuki in the past and this was his way of making sure it didn’t happen to Katsumi in the future.

Eijirou stared up at him, watching the way the sun fanned over his skin. How did someone like Katsuki exist, and how was Eijirou lucky enough to breathe the same air?

And what did it mean that Eijirou was allowed to exist here, next to Katsuki when he’s made it so clear he doesn’t want extra company.

They were friends, and they could only be friends, because the blonde had no interest in being in a relationship. Even if Eijirou broke things off with Hana, that didn’t mean he’d have even the slightest chance with Bakugou.

Did he want to be with Bakugou?

“Sorry bean sprout,” Katsumi cooed softly down at the pot.

So precious. ‘Sumi was so precious.

“Hey, are you hungry?” Katsuki asked, pointing back to the picnic blanket. “Kiri brought lunch.”

‘Sumi squinted at the two of them, “Were you two playing together before I got here?”

Eijirou was sure his face turned about ten shades redder. Katsuki laughed awkwardly. She was so innocent, and probably didn’t realize what her words implied. Her father cleared his throat.

“Katsumi, adults don’t play remember? We’re eating.”

The little girl hummed in response before running off to the food.

Eijirou got to his feet himself, watching as Katsuki took the pot off to the side of the garden, near the glass windows. The two of them walked back in a comfortable silence he hadn’t known existed until now.

But even in the comfort he couldn’t help but think this had to be a burden. Comforting Eijirou, spending time with Eijirou when Katsuki probably had his own set of issues. The blonde was a father for god's sake, his last thought was probably Eijirou.

“Sorry about today,” he felt himself mumbling.

The blonde gave him a puzzled look, “What?”

“I feel pathetic. I basically spilled all of my issues onto you today.”

But again, the man just gave him a confused look. Like he couldn’t disagree with Eijirou more.

“You’re allowed to talk about shit that hurts you, idiot.”

He wondered how many times Katsuki had to say it to himself to believe it was true. His mother always said fake it until you make it, but this was really hard. Eijirou felt so low all of the time, like he was trying to live up to an invisible standard that haunted him even when Hana wasn’t around.

But when he was with Katsuki, that standard disappeared. Everything disappeared until all he really felt was the unfiltered emotions he’d been so used to numbing.

Surely that must be what made everyone fall in love with Bakugou Katsuki.

Chapter Text

“You guys broke up again?!” Denki shouted.

Eijirou leaned back with a groan.

Today was one of those lucky days where almost everyone in their friend group was off and they could all hang out.

“Denki! Don’t be rude,” Sero shoved the blonde from his spot on the couch playfully.

“Dude she's insane! Last month she got mad at him for using a fork at a ramen restaurant! A fork!” Denki argued.

Today they’d gathered at Denki’s house to nurse Eijirou through his newest break up. After so many, you’d think the word break up would lose all meaning at this point.

But this one was different.

Because this time Eijirou was the one to call it off.

After his picnic with Katsuki, and the silent realization that he had feelings for the man, he understood that he’d outgrown Hana and there was really no saving the relationship anymore. If he had feelings for someone else, even though they were one sided, the manly thing to do was to break up.

It was ugly and there was a lot of screaming and denial on Hana’s part, but Eijirou was about ninety percent positive it was over.

“I’ve been buying her flowers as apologies though and uh—“

“Kiri, you’ve got to be kidding. You have nothing to apologize for!” Denki interrupted.

Mina shoved him again, earning a laugh from all four of them. Denki meant well. He was extremely overprotective of all of them, and he made sure that all of them knew that.

“That’s not the point,” Kirishima rolled his eyes with a smile.

“The owner there is super sweet, kinda serious but also spontaneous. Keeps me on my toes,” he explained.

Mina’s jaw dropped, “What?”

“You’re interested in someone else?” Sero raised his brows.

Eijirou shrugged his shoulders, “I-I mean, I don’t know.”

“You’re interested in someone else!” Denki threw his hands up in the air. “Does she treat you right? Please tell me she’s sweet—“

“Guys come on,” he groaned. He probably should’ve mentioned the fact that it was one sided earlier.

“They’ve got a lot on their plate. They have a five year old and—“

“How old is this chick?” Mina interrupted.

He felt his breath catch in his throat for a moment as he reminded himself that he didn’t tell them Katsuki was a man.

They wouldn’t care if he was gay, but he never really came out or anything. He didn’t even know he was gay until Katsuki.

“Kir?” Sero waved a hand in his face.

“It’s actually a guy. He’s our age.”

The brunette leaned back in surprise, “I didn’t know you were gay.”

“I didn’t know I was either. But I don’t know, there’s just something about him,” Eijirou shrugged.

Denki gave him a knowing smirk before nudging him in the arm, “You’ve got a crush~”

“Maybe. I don’t think it’ll go anywhere though. He’s not into dating much. He’s super focused on his daughter, and I wouldn’t want to do anything that would jeopardize my relationship with any of them.”

Honestly this is probably the most confusing time of his life. He’d broken up with his girlfriend for a man that didn’t want to date. Part of him was content with just staying friends with Katsuki, for the sake of Katsumi. Anything to keep the other man near.

“If he’s our age then he must’ve had his daughter pretty young. He’s divorced?” Mina asked suddenly.

“No, I don’t think so. I think there’s more to it, but he’s super secretive. It’s probably a sore topic.”

That was still a very gray area of their friendship. Eijirou was sure he hadn’t exactly earned the special amount of trust necessary to go into detail about what happened in Katsuki's life to make him so closed off or secretive. He supposed that that’s why he was doing all of this. Breaking up with Hana, being honest about his sexuality, telling his friends about Bakugou. He wanted to be someone to the other man.

“Does Hana know?” Sero asked awkwardly.

The squad hated her, there was no doubting that, but they put up with her for Eijirou’s sake. He was sure they were more than ready to be completely done with Hana for good.

But it was complicated.

They’d broken up, and when he left she said they weren’t broken up.

As far as he was concerned, they were done.

“No, and I don’t really know where I stand with her either.”

“So then this guy is just, what? A crush?” Denki asked.

And maybe that’s all Katsuki really would ever be for Eijirou. A crush that didn’t like him back. A crush that taught him how to live without fear. A crush that helped him take the steps to leave a toxic relationship.

Eijirou shook his head, “I don’t know.”

“Well let’s invite them to hang out,” Mina offered.

They were supposed to hang out all day today, though Eijirou isn’t sure Katsuki would be up for that at all. He and ‘Sumi had a much different life than they. Katsuki actually had to parent a child all day while the squad stuffed their face with chips and soda, and played video games until their heads ached.

“He would hate that,” Eijirou decided.

Denki jumped up and down from his spot next to Eijirou on the couch.

“No he wouldn’t! Come on, he can bring his daughter too. I have to give him my blessing.”

“It’s not like that!” Eijirou shook his head with a laugh.

The blonde groaned in annoyance, “Fine, fine. God you’re no fun. I still want to meet them!”

Eijirou let out a sigh before pulling out his phone, “I can try, but I can’t imagine he’d say yes.”

—

Katsuki didn’t know why on earth he would ever say yes to hanging out with people his age. Other twenty three year olds did not vibe with twenty three year old single parents. That’s like the oldest known fact in the book of single parents.

He’s fucking nervous to say the least. Meeting new people means getting to know each other, which usually means asking questions, which ultimately leads to answering questions.

And well, Katsuki lived a very questionable life to other people.

They’d ask about Katsumi, which he could handle. In fact, his daughter is his favorite topic. He could go on and on for days about how amazing she is. But people are often nosy. They’ll want to know about her other parent, and when Katsuki says she doesn’t have one they’ll want to know what happened.

They’ll want to know where she came from.

It makes his chest lock up in a disgusting way.

Katsuki wasn’t ashamed of himself for getting pregnant at eighteen, but he knew that other people looked at him like he was a freak. Like it was wrong to be a transgender man and have a baby. It’s hard enough for some people to understand teen pregnancy, but adding on the fact that he’s a man made it ten times harder to even begin to explain.

He doesn’t want to explain. He doesn’t want anyone to make him feel bad about his choices or who he and Katsumi are. He loved his daughter and that was all that mattered.

Even so, his heart beat a thousand beats per second as they arrived at the front door of Eijirou’s friend’s place. They were just hanging out. Simply playing video games and eating junk food. They had requested to meet Katsumi, so it wasn’t a burden.

He wasn’t a burden for being here, he told himself. They asked both of them to come.

The door swung open before he could even knock, which honestly was probably a good thing because half of him was ready to turn around and run home.

“Kiri!” Katsumi squealed excitedly, reaching out for him.

The redhead wore his hair down today, bangs wispy and falling perfectly to frame his chiseled face. He pulled Katsumi from Katsuki's arms like it was a practiced skill. Like it was no big deal, something he did everyday.

“Ah, Sooms! I’m so happy you're here,” he smiled as he sat the girl on his hip. When he turned to Katsuki he gave him a warm grin.

“Hey,” Eijirou said softly.

“Hi,” Katsuki nodded nervously.

His stomach felt sick. What if these people didn’t like him? What if that meant Eijirou wouldn’t like him? What if all of these people have some sort of negative impact on Katsumi?

“Come meet everyone,” Eijirou grabbed his hand and pulled him inside. He led him inside to a living room where a few other men sat playing video games and yelling a little too loudly about a blue shell.

“Guys, katsuki’s here,” Eijirou announced.

Katsuki cringed at the introduction. Fuck what should he say? What if they knew him from high school? What if they think he’s just some old geyser with a child?

The girl of the group turned around from her spot on the couch and smiled excitedly at Katsuki. Her hair was a vibrant pink, and she had those long nails that looked sharp enough to poke her eye out.

“Oh my god, aren’t you the cutest thing!”

At first Katsuki assumed she was talking to his daughter, but after their eyes stayed locked onto each other he realized that she was actually talking about him. What the fuck was he supposed to say to that?

The other guys paused the game to introduce themselves as well.

Sero was the dude with the black hair, and arguably the most comforting person in the room other than Eijirou. He worked at the same gym as Kirishima and his boyfriend was a nursing major named Todoroki. He wouldn’t be here tonight to meet Katsuki and Katsumi.

He couldn’t help but laugh at the way the man made it sound like meeting them was some grand event.

Kaminari was a ball of energy that had even ‘Sumi visibly overwhelmed at first. He worked nearby, though half way through him talking Katsuki noticed his daughter's eyes glued to the bowl of Cheetos on the table. Man, video games and junk food. This was like high school Katsuki’s guilty pleasure.

He took his daughter from Kirishima’s hands and sat both of them down by the coffee table as he continued to listen to the group talk about whatever interesting topic they seemed to have.

Mina couldn’t find any other lesbians in the city, Denki couldn’t decide if he wanted to date this girl from the record store down the road or the guy he met at a nightclub a few weeks ago.

And not one of them tried to pry into Katsuki's personal information at all. They asked if he was gay, but Katsuki argued that that was pretty obvious. And yeah, they asked if Katsumi was born when he was eighteen and what that was like, but it was all manageable and not overbearing.

He felt really good actually. They all seemed to enjoy Katsumi’s presence as well.

When the door to Denki’s house opened again however, the mood instantly fell.

After a moment of clicking heels sounding down the hallway, a woman with dark hair and pale blue eyes entered the room.

“H-Hana? What are you doing here?” Eijirou shook his head.

This was Hana?

“You always invite me to group hangouts,” the girl huffed as she joined the group in the living room.

So Eijirou hadn’t broken up with her then? One glance around the room showed an equal amount of confusion on his friends' faces.

“Whatever Hana,” he muttered before turning back towards the TV, much less excited than before.

Katsuki watched her walk in from his spot on the floor. He leaned against the couch, holding Sooms in his lap while the others finished a round of what looked to be a racing game.

“And who are you,” the woman, Hana, asked.

Eijirou rolled his eyes behind her and moved to sit on the couch behind Katsuki. She seemed to hate that, and sat right next to him as well, practically sitting in his lap.

He leaned forward, not wanting to get a knee to the back of his head as she nudged closer to Kirishima. To her boyfriend.

“Bakugou,” he nodded.

“And how do you know Eijirou,” she demanded.

Katsuki shrugged his shoulders and looked at the other man. His face remained angry, despite the fact that he was faking a smile. Katsuki could tell he was uncomfortable.

“We’re friends,” he shrugged.

“I don’t remember you two being friends,” Hana shook her head.

At that he couldn’t help but laugh. At first he really did think she was joking, but when she didn’t laugh he cleared his throat and asked, “Do you know every single one of his friends.”

“Yes.”

He let out another breathless laugh. God she was awful. Just as bad as Eijirou had described.

So why was she here? Why did Eijirou invite her? Were they back together?

“What’s so funny,” the woman asked, growing annoyed at Katsuki’s existence.

He wasn’t sure why, he wasn’t really doing anything.

“Okay Hana, you’ve met,” Denki nodded, trying to lighten the awkwardness.

“I like your hair,” Sumi smiled at the woman.

A collective Aw resounded through the room and Katsuki couldn’t help but feel proud of how kind his daughter was. She probably didn’t realize this woman was a terrible person to Eijirou, but Katsuki wasn’t going to correct her. He valued her innocence.

“You brought your kid to a hang out with a bunch of twenty year olds,” Hana scoffed.

She leaned closer to Eijirou, who sat completely still, unmoving. Katsuki couldn’t explain why his chest hurt watching them together.

“We invited her too,” Mina interrupted.

At that Hana seemed to deflate at least for a moment. Maybe she finally found a shred of humanity and realized she was being too harsh.

“You’re mom did a good job on your hair as well,” Hana nodded.

And it would’ve been fine if they left it there. Katsuki didn’t care if she knew that he was the one who did her hair or not. But of course ‘Sumi wanted to.

“Daddy did it. I don’t have a mom.”

“Alright Bakugou, it’s time,” Kaminari cut off the conversation.

“For what?” He silently nodded his head in thank you.

He wondered how much these people knew about him. Surely only as much as he’s told Eijirou, which only amounted to him being a single, young, father.

“To test your greatness,” the electric blonde knelt to the ground and handed him two controllers. “Mario Kart.”

“Never played,” Katsuki shook his head.

“Time to learn then,” was the other man’s response.

He looked at the controllers awkwardly, “I don’t even know how the controllers work.”

“You can learn,” Sero added as he grabbed his own set of controllers.

“But there’s fucking two,” Katsuki exclaimed.

He didn’t want to embarrass himself in front of Eijirou’s friends. Katsuki hadn’t picked up a video game since he was pregnant.

“Denki it’s fine,” Kirishima shook his head with a sly, teasing grin. “it’s obvious Bakugou is scared of losing, so don’t pressure him.”

“What?” Katsuki’s jaw dropped.

“Don’t worry about it Bakugou, I know you don’t like to lose so.”

Oh this fucker was going down.

He picked ‘Sumi up and placed her in the squishy chair with Mina, who took her happily.

“Watch my child,” he smiled before locking in.

—

“He bodied you Denks,” Eijirou cackled after Katsuki won the third round of Mario kart.

Denki made a sound akin to a dying cat before throwing his controllers on the couch and sadly stuffing his face with potato chips.

“Here,” Katsuki chuckled, handing the controllers back to Denki.

“Nah man, keep playing, this is amazing,” Sero laughed as he watched Katsuki’s win streak replay on the screen.

This was somehow a lot more fun than Katsuki had assumed it would be. Things with Eijirou’s friends were really easy. He didn’t have to put on a big act, or try to fit into a specific category. They were all really strange in their own ways and it made Katsuki feel like he fit right in.

“Or you could watch your child that you literally brought to this party,” a snappy voice said behind him.

“Hana,” Eijirou groaned.

Eijirou seemed to be having a really hard time with her, which didn’t really make sense to Katsuki. Why would he invite Hana in the first place? He shouldn’t care, but he had to know. We’re they back together now?

“What? It’s bad enough that you brought a child to a party in the first place, and now you’re making poor Mina watch her?” Hana gestured between Katsuki and Mina.

“It’s fine, I don’t mind at all,” Mina shook her head immediately.

Maybe she didn’t care. Maybe Mina really enjoyed Katsumi’s presence like he’d originally thought.

But now that Hana said it, his brain regressed five years and he was back in a room full of people, completely alone. Completely unwanted. A complete waste of space, air, time, sex, love, money, schooling.

“Why’re you being mean to daddy?” Katsumi asked innocently.

Katsuki cringed, knowing that the question wouldn’t be received well considering how childish Hana was.

“I’m not!” The woman shouted, growing annoyed at the situation.

“Hey,” Katsuki said calmly. “don’t yell at my kid. We don’t even know you.”

If it weren’t for the fact that his daughter was here, he would’ve yelled at Hana and told her off. He would’ve done so much damage that she left the house crying. But he didn’t want to yell in front of Katsumi. That would only stress her out and make her fearful of everyone in the room.

His daughter's eyes were so wide, and all Katsuki could do was watch the dread in her face sink in, and the new found feeling of being someone else’s burden latched onto her innocent brain.

Fuck, this was exactly what he didn’t want for his daughter.

For the world to beat her down, for someone to make her feel insignificant.

He didn’t want Katsumi to ever feel how he felt.

“Exactly, So why’re you here?” Hana hissed.

Why the fuck /was/ he here? He didn’t have to be. He /shouldn’t/ be. Katsuki was the adult. He was the parent.

He was supposed to protect his daughter from the yelling, the fighting, the degrading.

So why on earth was he here?

It certainly wasn’t for Eijirou.

One glance at him told Katsuki that, as the man sat next to Hana and said absolutely nothing. He supposed the redhead didn’t owe him that. Nobody here owed him anything.

Katsuki wasn’t worth all the extra work.

“Hana, why’re you here? Nobody even invited you,” Mina raised her voice, and damn that girl could yell.

He should say something, anything to make this stop.

Katsumi didn’t have to live in a world like this, where people argued and yelled at her for existing.

“Because I’m Eijirou’s girlfriend,” she laughed. Like everyone else in the room was fucking stupid for asking that. He should do something.

But he’s so fucking weak. So fucking stupid. The words won’t even come out of his throat, because they’re all yelling and somehow Katsuki was caught in the middle, and it’s all his fault once again.

“Daddy,” Katsumi said with big, worried eyes.

She was scared. She wasn’t used to this. All of the yelling and arguing. Katsumi grew up in a house of quietness, of peace and acceptance, and communication. Katsuki had made sure of it.

He needed to get her out of here. They should’ve never even been here. He’s supposed to be her father, not a twenty three year old dude playing video games and hanging out with friends. You can’t have both.

Mina and Hana were still going at it, and maybe if Katsumi wasn’t here Katsuki would applaud Mina for having a petty little dig for every snarky remark Hana threw.

But above all of this he’s Katsumi’s safety net, and if she’s scared then he needed to get the fuck out of here. He’d apologize to Eijirou later.

“We’re gonna head out.”

“No, Bakugou, don’t,” Sero furrowed his brow.

Pathetically enough Katsuki felt a bit of pride in knowing that someone actually wanted him to stay. That he was still capable of being cool and having friends like every other person his age.

“It’s all good. We’ve got to go to bed by 8,” he lied.

Katsumi looked at him with teary eyes, like she didn’t want to leave. This was one of those moments where he had to be a dad and make shitty decisions that might make his daughter cry. Even if she wanted to stay, they couldn’t. Not when some bitch was yelling at his daughter.

Not when Eijirou was perfectly fine with Hana staying.

It shouldn’t matter. They’re hardly even friends, yet Katsuki felt a growing sense of frustration over the fact that Eijirou let her come back so easily and treat his friends so poorly.

He isn’t sure why he expected Eijirou to have a little more fight in him. Katsuki wasn’t sure why he expected more.

“I wanna stay with auntie Mina,” Katsumi’s bottom lip wobbled.

He’d question where the name Auntie Mina came from later.

“The adults have to have their adult time too,” he wiped a stray tear as it felt from her precious little eye.

It probably was time for bed anyways. Katsumi was a good sleeper, but sometimes she got fussy before bed. She hated missing out on stuff. It was probably good they were leaving before she threw a fit and made everyone awkward and unsure of what to do.

“Here I’ll walk you two out,” Eijirou offered.

He picked up the potted plant and followed Katsuki to the front door. Katsuki didn’t wait for him. He didn’t need Eijirou. He didn’t need anyone’s help.

“Pretty sure he doesn’t need help finding his car,” Hana yelled, solidifying Katsuki’s already growing guilt for pulling Eijirou away from his group hang out.

He walked quickly to his car and sat Katsumi in her car seat. She wasn’t crying anymore, which Katsuki was grateful for. Instead she was blinking sleepily. Hopefully she’d fall asleep in the backseat.

“Katsuki,” Eijirou called out to him, grass crunching as he skipped the sidewalk to catch up with them.

“It’s cool, we’ve got bed time seriously,” Katsuki called, finishing the buckle on the car seat and shutting the door softly.

“Don’t leave,” Eijirou begged.

“She seemed angry,” he changed the subject.

He really didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t want Eijirou to know that his feelings were hurt, or that it really bothered him that Hana was there, because honestly Katsuki doesn’t understand what that means himself.

“Probably.”

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow morning then?”

“Katsuki let me explain,” Eijirou sighed.

He seemed frustrated. Katsuki made him feel that way.

All of this was such a let down.

But Katsuki isn’t even sure what he was expecting out of this. He supposed he wanted things to be different than they were five years ago. He expected people to be different.

It’s not different though. It’s not different, because Eijirou is still with Hana.

And the fact that Katsuki felt jealous of Hana was enough of a reason to leave.

“You don’t owe me an explanation. I have to do what’s right for Sooms. She doesn’t need to be in a room with a bunch of adults yelling at each other.”

It was true. He didn’t have time to be jealous, or date for that matter. He shouldn’t even have these stupid feelings. Katsuki didn’t even realize he had them for Eijirou until now.

“I know, I know. I didn’t know she was coming I swear,” Eijirou closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair.

Katsuki hated that he was part of the other man’s stress. That’s what he always fucking did. He became people's problem. His mother, his father, his best friend, his ex, Eijirou.

He couldn't become Katsumi’s problem too.

“I don’t care if she’s here. She’s your girlfriend,” Katsuki shook his head. He forced himself to believe that to be true.

It’s easier that way.

“She’s not.”

At that, Kirishima seemed really angry, like he was tired of this too.

That was Katsuki’s hint to leave. He opened his car door, ignoring the way the redhead politely opened it for him and made sure he got into the car safely.

“Okay. Well, I need to put my daughter to bed so, I’ll see you around Kirishima,” he said, probably a bit too quickly before he yanked the car door shut, stripping it from the other man’s fingers.

He couldn’t do this again. He wouldn’t do this in front of Katsumi. Katsuki wouldn’t lose focus on what really mattered. He’d promised himself that.

With a glance through the rear view mirror, he watched Katsumi sleep soundly in her seat.

This was what mattered, he told himself.

Even though it felt like a piece of his heart was standing on the curb, watching him start his car and leave.

—

Katsumi went down for bed as soon as she was changed into her pjs. It left the house completely silent by nine o’clock. Katsuki had decided to turn on the tv and forget about everything that just happened until he fell asleep.

But then there was a soft knock on his front door. Strange. People usually didn’t fuck with them in general, considering their house is hidden above the flower shop, behind the rooftop garden. People definitely didn’t visit at nine pm. He held his breath as he opened the door.

“Hi!” Eijirou smiled excitedly at the door, only stopping when Katsuki flinched and looked back towards his sleeping child’s bedroom. He must’ve realized how loud his was, because soon he whispered, “Sorry, hi.”

“What are you doing here,” Katsuki shook his head in confusion.

Usually when Katsuki disengaged with another person, that person would let out a sigh of relief and move on with their life. They’d be happy to no longer have to worry about their pregnant— well not pregnant anymore— friend.

He’d had enough practice with this feeling of being left behind back in high school. When word got around that he was pregnant, he lost everyone. Nobody wanted to be friends with a trans dude to begin with, it was too complicated in their eyes, but with the added pregnancy, people went running for the hills.

He was completely isolated from everyone, and those who tried to stay and support him were glad when he dropped out of high school and off of the face of the planet for the next year and a half.

So he’s used to it. He’s used to walking away from stuff he wanted, used to being let down by people, used to taking one for the team and leaving.

He’s not used to people coming back for him.

And he’s not used to the flutter in his chest upon seeing a person's face either.

“Ice cream,” Eijirou held up a giant bag filled with pint sized containers of different ice cream flavors.

Katsuki chanced a glance at the clock on the wall, “It’s nine o’clock at night.”

But the redhead just shrugged his shoulders,“Ice cream knows no limits.”

And well, as much as he wanted to argue that there definitely were limits to ice cream, Katsuki was too tired and drained from tonight to really care. As long as Eijirou was quiet and didn’t wake Katsumi, he entertained whatever this strange idea was.

He moved aside and let Eijirou in, watching as the man quietly took off his shoes and found his way to the living room. The taller man was still in his clothes from the hang out, like maybe he’d come straight from there and only stopped to get ice cream from the store.

When all of the ice cream was set out on the coffee table, and the redhead was situated on the couch, Katsuki awkwardly joined him. He didn’t know what to say, so instead he just stared down at the coffee table.

What the fuck was he supposed to say? He thought for sure that after tonight Eijirou would realize that Katsuki was only ever going to be a waste of his twenties.

“I wanted to apologize for tonight,” the redhead admitted.

Katsuki eyed him peculiarly. That’s never happened before. Then again, every guy Katsuki has ever had the displeasure of hanging out with had been a conceited, narcissistic asshole.

“You don’t owe me one,” he shook his head.

He reached for one of the ice cream containers and inspected its flavor. Mint chocolate chip.

Eijirou hadn’t touched anything yet, still trying to apologize for tonight.

“I do. I didn’t think Hana would be there, and I didn’t expect her to be so mean to ‘Sooms. I’m really sorry. I would never intentionally put either of you in a situation like that, and I should’ve stood up for you two.”

Katsuki scoffed, “I can stand up for us just fine.”

“Yeah, but you shouldn’t have had to.”

God please, just stop. Stop saying stuff that made it harder to forget about him. Eventually Eijirou would leave Katsuki, and all he would have is their memories.

And Katsuki really wanted some of the memories to be bad. At least then it wouldn’t hurt so much to miss him.

“So you brought apology ice cream,” Katsuki asked.

The redhead shrugged, “I didn’t know what you liked, but knowing you, you’ll let me know what’s good and bad. I bought seven different flavors to try.”

Katsuki bit his bottom lip. He doesn’t even know how to accept an apology. He’d never gotten one before, except for his parents after Katsumi was born and they stopped giving him the cold shoulder.

“I’m watching Netflix,” he said instead, hoping Eijirou would read between the lines.

He must have, because after a moment of contemplative silence the redhead furrowed his brow, “Why aren’t you angry with me?”

“I'm not angry,” Katsuki sighed. “I'm a little upset with myself, but not angry.”

“Yourself? Why? You didn’t do anything,” the bigger man asked, deeming now an acceptable time to grab another pint of ice cream and pry it open.

When Katsuki turned to see what flavor he had, Eijirou held it out so that he could take the first scoop. It was chocolate peanut butter.

It was almost enough to distract him from all of the awful memories tonight brought up. Tonight felt like he failed as a father. Tonight he let someone make his kid feel like she wasn’t important. Like she didn’t matter.

When he chanced a glance at those deep ruby eyes, Eijirou wasn’t looking at him expectantly. It wasn’t like Katsuki had to say anything at all. He didn’t have to tell the other man anything, and he could see that communicated through the other’s eyes.

But that’s the reason he felt like he could tell him a little bit of his back story. It was only fair to Eijirou, for being so patient with all of Katsuki’s shit.

“I used to have a boyfriend that treated me like his heaviest burden.”

It felt like even telling the other man that much was a burden of itself.

He’d never been good at this. At talking about the shit that pains him, talking about his past and how fucked it all got.

That’s why he cared so much about raising Katsumi to be open and honest with herself. All of his pain, all of his suffering from staying quiet, he wouldn’t dare pass that onto Katsumi. She would be honest when something hurt, honest when someone hurt her.

She would be nothing like Katsuki, and that would be fine, better even.

“And I promised myself when Katsumi was born that I’d never let someone make her feel like I felt,” he smiled sadly.

He’d be lying if he said it didn’t feel good to get some of it— even just the surface level bullshit— off of his chest. His past weighed so heavy on him. It haunted him. Even though he would never make it someone else’s problem, it felt good to tear off a piece of his dread and set it down with Eijirou for a second.

In a minute he’d clean up his mess and close himself back up. He’d pretend he never said anything and go back to being silent.

He’d listen to Eijirou’s girl problems and give him advice so that he would never feel an inch of the miles of pain Katsuki walked on.

“I’m really sorry,” Eijirou looked at the ground, like he was truly ashamed of himself.

It wasn’t his fault. He’s not the one with a kid that needs raising. He’s not the one who had to bring a five year old to an adult social setting because he’s a single parent and only has two friends who were both busy.

“It’s okay, I shouldn’t have gone,” Katsuki admitted.

And he shouldn’t have.

He wasn’t sure why he wanted to go in the first place. Maybe to be supportive of Eijirou.

“No, you had every right to be there, and so did Sooms. Hana wasn’t even invited, she just showed up,” the redhead denied.

But Eijirou still let her stay.

Katsuki didn’t know what to make of the redhead, and his on and off relationship. It was confusing, and toxic. It reminded Katsuki of something he’d promised himself he’d stay far away from.

He didn’t want to date. He couldn’t. Katsuki had a child to worry about, and his daughter didn’t deserve the instability of people coming in and out of her life just because Katsuki wasn’t good enough to hold a normal relationship.

The man could already tell he wouldn’t be nearly enough for Eijirou, even if he tried really fucking hard.

Maybe Eijirou was messy, but Katsuki was a goddamn wildfire of problems. He was a whole separate bomb waiting to detonate.

“I’m really sorry Katsuki. I really care about our friendship and I want Katsumi to feel safe around me. I hope I didn’t lose either of your trust tonight.”

The blonde shakes his head with pursed lips.

It’s so strange, the way Eijirou gives him respect like this.

A flash of a memory crawls through his brain. Back when he was eighteen, head bowed, barely pregnant and begging a man he thought he loved to please just listen, just look at him, just stop yelling.

“I give it an 8.5,” he said suddenly, referring to the icecream in his hands. Anything to not bring up those awful memories again.

He would never ever let something like that happen to him again.

“Yeah? I give it a zero, I hate mint chocolate chip. It’s all yours,” Eijirou scrunched his nose at the ice cream.

But part of him did wonder, if he’d given himself to Eijirou would things have been different? If he’d been smart enough, or seen a little more self worth in himself at eighteen maybe he wouldn’t be so skeptical of the world and what it had to offer himself and his daughter.

Then again, Eijirou doesn’t know anything about Katsuki.

He doesn’t know about the horrible depression that came with pregnancy, or the body dysphoria that never did quite leave.

Fuck, the man didn’t even know he was trans, or that he was the one that held Katsumi. He even asked about the /woman/ that helped conceive his daughter.

If he knew, really knew, would he still stay? Would Eijirou still look at him like this wonderful person with so much wisdom and maturity. Or would he see Katsuki for what he really was. Lost, hurt, depressed.

It was terrifying to let people truly see you.

“Sorry if tonight was childish,” Eijirou said after a moment of silence.

“Kirishima, why do you keep apologizing to me?” Katsuki scolded.

“I don’t know.”

In some ways Katsuki thinks he might’ve jumped into the redheads life because he noticed the signs and wanted to cut the line before it was too late. It was obvious that Eijirou dated someone mentally abusive, but he wasn’t as far gone as Katsuki. He could still be shown his self worth. He could be saved.

“Did I say tonight was childish?” The redhead shook his head. “Did I act like I didn’t have fun?” He shook his head again.

“I had a lot of fun, Ei,” Katsuki let out a sigh. “I haven’t played video games and eaten junk food since I was seventeen. Your friends were annoyingly nice, and super supportive of me having a daughter. Zero complaints.”

And he really did have fun. For a moment it was nice to be a twenty three year old again. To hang out with people his age and be normal.

“Do you miss it?” Kirishima asked, scooping from a new container of chocolate ice cream.

Katsuki squinted at him in confusion.

“Before Katsumi. Do you ever miss it?” Eijirou clarified.

And Katsuki felt his fucking stomach drop all the way down to his feet.

“You want me to throw you out of my house?” He snapped.

Eijirou immediately put his hands up, holding his spoon in his mouth with wide eyes like he realized he just said something super rude.

When he pulled the spoon from his mouth he continued, “No that’s not what I meant, obviously I know she’s everything to you, but eighteen is so young. How’d you manage?”

And it was sweet that Eijirou cared enough to ask. After years of constant questioning, Katsuki would say those questions were the ones he didn’t mind as much. They were much easier to answer than ‘how did you get pregnant if you’re a man’ or ‘where is your baby’s father’ or ‘does this mean you are detransitioning’.

But still, it’s difficult to answer without giving too much information.

“I just did it, I don’t know.”

He took another scoop of ice cream, this one cherry, and stuffed his face with it so he didn’t have to talk more.

If he talked more, surely he’d scare Eijirou away. Right now, Katsuki was a man, eating ice cream, while his daughter slept. He wasn’t the disappointment of his parents' lives, or the high school dropout, or the teen pregnancy story, or the trans person that everyone looked at with confusion.

“What happened to her mom?” Eijirou asked softly. He probably didn’t mean anything by it, he was probably just curious. He’d said it so sweetly, like maybe he thought Katsuki's spouse was dead.

But goddamn. Mom, mom, mom. Fucking hell, is it really so wrong? What he did, was it really so unheard of?

Was his ex right? Was he disgusting for wanting this? Was he going back on so much progress in his transition? Was Katsuki going against his six year old self who wanted nothing more than to be a boy and be respected like one?

“She doesn’t have one.”

“So she just manifested into thin air?” The redhead joked.

Katsuki wished he wouldn’t.

“Her manifestation is none of your concern,” he teased back, though nothing hurt more than to pretend you weren’t hurting.

But Kirishima couldn’t know.

He was sick of losing people over decisions he was happy to make. People didn’t understand why he chose to have Katsumi, and because they didn’t understand they ostracized him, they distanced themselves, they thought he was weird.

Katsuki couldn’t handle that again.

In the silence of the house, he heard a creak, or maybe a footstep, or maybe the sound of the air conditioning kicking on. It sounded all too familiar of the days Katsumi would wake up and crawl into Katsuki's bed.

Fuck, if she was awake and saw this ice cream she’d definitely want some. Then she wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep.

“Hold on, shut up,” he muttered, holding a hand up.

“I haven’t said anything—“

“Shh!” He grabbed the remote that controlled the lights and turned off the overhead.

“What? The lights? Really?” Eijirou scolded.

Katsuki shoved the other man’s shoulder to silence him.

“I thought I heard Katsumi.”

“So you’re hiding?! You’re her dad!” Eijirou whispered before shoving him back.

Katsuki shoved back again, before sarcastically shouting in a hushed voice, “Oh really? I forgot about that!”

After that the shoving became more of a wrestling match where both of them were pushing each other back and forth for a solid minute in a half. Katsuki let out an annoyed growl when Eijirou stifled a laugh.

“I don’t want her to know you’re here, or that we’re eating ice cream because then she won’t be able to go back to sleep. She likes you and ice cream too much.”

“You’re evil,” Eijirou whispered as he gasped.

“It’s what’s good for her,” he whispered, pointing his finger at the other man despite the fact that it was pitch black in the room. “Being a parent means making hard decisions or whatever the fuck.”

Eijirou giggled at the crudeness, when in return had Katsuki smiling, because fuck you. The redhead’s giggle was one of the cutest sounds in the world even when he was laughing /at/ Katsuki.

“Hold on, I’ll be right back,” he whispered as he silently stood.

He would check her room and make sure she was still asleep. It would take all but two minutes. The blonde stepped over what he assumed was Eijirou’s body. It was dark in the living room, and he could hardly make out the furniture that had been in the same place for five years. With Eijirou’s added body, it made for a very intense game of twister in the dark.

“Kats—“

Eijirou didn’t get to finish his sentence, because somehow in a matter of second Katsuki tripped on the leg of the coffee table, dropped his spoon on the hardwood floors, and fell on top of Eijirou. They were a mess of tangled limbs in the small space between the couch and the coffee table, in the middle of a very dark living room.

“Fuck I am so sorry,” Katsuki fumbled with his body, trying and failing multiple times to get off of the poor man below him.

Thank god Eijirou was bigger than him or he’d have crushed him. He blushed at the fact that his body was hardly big enough to actually do any substantial damage towards the redhead.

“I don’t think she’s awake,” Eijirou concluded with a breathless chuckle.

At that Katsuki couldn’t help but drop his head against Eijirou’s chin and let out a quiet, choked out laugh. God he was such an idiot. Leave it to Katsuki to fall on top of the guy he promised himself he wouldn’t fall for.

“God you have the best laugh,” the redhead wheezed out in between the quiet laughter of his own.

Katsuki didn’t understand what he’d done to be treated so kindly by Eijirou. He didn’t do anything to deserve to be spoken to so softly. If anything he was a burden, making the other man hide in the dark because his daughter was awake, and then fucking falling on top of him like a bean bag.

And yet, Eijirou brushed his thumb against Katsuki's jaw line, and moved his body ever so slightly to make their position feel less tense.

And his mouth was so close, breath so warm, scent so overwhelming and Eijirou inched closer and closer in the darkness until his lips brushed against Katsuki’s.

It takes him a whole minute to process the fact that they’re kissing, and they shouldn’t be, but gods it felt so /right/.

To be held in arms that wanted him, to /know/ that those hands were holding him because they wanted to and not because they felt guilty. To not always be the one initiating ever intimate touch. To be wanted and to know that it’s wanted.

Even though everything in Katsuki's brain is screaming at him to stop, to not let things go this far, to remember what happened five years ago.

He’s nothing but water in the other’s much larger hands.

Eijirou smelt like expensive cologne, and strawberry shampoo. His lips were just as soft as Katsuki had guiltily imagined and with every kiss he felt himself wishing to dive deeper and deeper until he was drowning in Eijirou.

“Kirishima,” he whispered against the other man’s lips.

The redhead’s hands were slowly making their way under his shirt, and those calloused pads of his fingers were gently climbing up his back as the kiss deepened.

Katsuki squirmed at the touch. He couldn’t know. Eijirou couldn’t know what sat beneath his clothes. He couldn’t let the other man see him for what he truly was.

He didn’t know what he’d do if Eijirou reeled back in disgust.

“Eijirou.”

The man slowly pulled away, though it was too dark in the room to really see him.

“You have a girlfriend.”

The other man shook his head, “We’re not together right now.”

“Yeah, not /right now/,” Katsuki scoffed.

Because that was truly what this was. They weren’t together right now, so Katsuki was convenient. It couldn’t possibly be any other reason.

“Not ever. We’re done,” Eijirou said firmly.

Katsuki wanted to say he didn’t believe him, because truthfully he didn’t. How could he when they were so off and on? One minute they were broken up then the next he was back at the flower shop to buy her flowers. It was a constant stab in his chest each time he saw Eijirou now.

He was at the flower shop, happy to see Katsuki, but that’s not why he was there. Eijirou was there to buy his girlfriend flowers, trying to convince her to give him another chance.

And Katsuki wasn’t a side piece. He wasn’t built for that lifestyle.

“I’m not interested in fooling around casually.”

He had a child in his life. He couldn’t do casual.

“I’m not asking you for all that,” the redhead smiled softly. “I just want to be close to you.”

So he didn’t want more from katsuki.

He just wanted this, right now. Eijirou just wanted to kiss, just wanted to feel someone else’s breath against his own. This wouldn’t turn into casual sex, or a friends with benefits situation. That’s not what Eijirou wanted. He just wanted to kiss.

And Katsuki could do that. He wanted to do that. He could handle that.

“I want to be close to you too,” he admitted.

And then their lips were back on each other, just as slow as before, like the redhead wanted to savor this moment. Katsuki couldn’t understand why. Why would anyone want to do this with him?

He was used, damaged, already experienced in every area of this.

Yet Eijirou kissed him like it was his first time, and he wanted to be gentle. Katsuki could memorize each point of his teeth, he could feel each burning touch of the other man’s hands against his back.

Deep somewhere in the back of his mind, Katsuki half wondered if he’d let Eijirou save his life, or if he’d let himself continue to drown.

But that’s not what this was. This was kissing, and only kissing. There was no other connection between them.

“Daddy? Are you in here?” A voice squeaked in the dark living room.

In seconds Katsuki was shoving himself off of the other man, practically falling off of his body and banging his shoulder against the damn coffee table in the process.

The lights flicked on, and only then could Katsuki see just how disheveled Eijirou looked from a kiss alone. His cheeks were a deep red, lips swollen and glossy, and one sneak at the other's pants had Katsuki squeezing his eyes shut and turning to find the source of his daughter's voice.

“You two are having a slumber party without me?!” She shouted from his spot at the light switch.

“No, no, no! He was just leaving!” Katsuki raised his hands and shook them profusely.

The last thing he needed was for Katsumi to tell his parents, or fucking Deku that he had a sleep over with a man.

“There’s ice cream everywhere,” Katsumi gasped in betrayal. “You guys got ice cream.”

Eijirou sat up, seeming to have adjusted his awkward tent situation. Thank fucking god.

“Katsumi, we were just testing it to see if you’d like it. You wouldn’t like these flavors trust me.”

He was so good with her. He knew exactly what to say to a five year old. Katsuki could help but be grateful that the other man was doing the bare minimum of acting like his daughter was a human being who deserved to be acknowledged.

“Right, exactly,” Katsuki nodded, darting his eyes back and forth from Eijirou to his daughter. “Eijirou was just leaving actually. Tell him goodnight.”

The redhead took the hint and stood up. His face was still red, flushed from kissing— holy fuck, Katsuki can’t believe he just kissed a man for the first time in five fucking years. How the fuck did Eijirou Kirishima break this dry spell?

“Yes, so true. Goodnight Sooms,” the other man nodded.

He closed the lids on the ice creams and left them on the coffee table because he was a kind, thoughtful bastard and probably knew that Katsumi would want ice cream tomorrow.

Katsuki stood as well. The other man bent down to give ‘Sumi a hug goodnight, and then followed Katsuki to the door.

He hoped this didn’t make Eijirou hate him. He hoped the red head wouldn’t turn into the man of his past, who thought his daughter did nothing but get in the way of his life goals. He prayed this wasn’t the last he’d see of Eijirou despite not quite understanding what all of this meant, or if it meant anything at all.

But when Eijirou turned around, he was smiling.

He was smiling, genuinely, and maybe chuckling a bit at the situation.

He didn’t look angry at all.

“Bye Kats,” he said softly.

Katsuki let out a shaky laugh of his own, feeling the way he should’ve felt all those years ago, when he actually was a teenager. His own face was heating up at the mere fact that he’d just kissed this man, and while his brain had a million terrible thoughts running through it, his heart was doing a little dance in his chest.

“Bye Ei.”

Chapter Text

Eijirou isn’t sure how in his two years of dating Hana, he’s just now realizing that he had the right to open his door and tell her to get out. Tonight is the night he uses that right. Or at least, he’s trying to.

Honestly he doesn’t know why the fuck she’s here, considering he broke up with her two weeks ago, and reiterated their break up after she was a total jerk to Katsuki and Katsumi. They were not together, they hadn’t been together for over two weeks.

But it seemed that he was the only one who knew that. Because somehow Hana waltzed into his apartment, and declared that they were going to an expensive ass restaurant tonight to make up. Eijirou of course reminded her that they broke up, and that he truly meant it this time.

And that’s how he ended up asking her to leave for the forth time tonight, after a screaming match that would surely get him a noise complaint.

“Are you fucking stupid?” Hana shouted at him. “I’m not leaving no matter how many times you open the damn door so just give it a rest.”

Eijirou closed the door, probably a bit too aggressively, “You can yell at me all you want but you had no right to raise your voice at Katsumi.”

Currently the argument was pertaining to Katsuki and Katsumi. He’d told her he didn’t want to be with someone who was so cruel to children, and so openly rude to one of his friends.

Hana of course did not like that accusation.

She let out an exasperated sigh before running her hands through her short black hair, “Oh my god you’re seriously upset about that? She was talking about shit she knew nothing about—“

“She’s a five year old, and you were being cruel to her father, of course she’d say something,” Eijirou interrupted quickly.

Even just talking about Katsuki and ‘Sumi in front of Hana felt wrong.

Especially since they kissed a week ago after the get together. He and Hana were broken up, he didn’t owe her an explanation, and he sure as hell didn’t have to tell her that the two of them kissed. But an immense feeling of guilt for /Katsuki/ passed through him at the fact that he was the focal point of this argument. They should be left out of all of this. It had nothing to do with them.

“Why the fuck do you even care? She’s just some kid!” Hana stomped her foot in annoyance.

“She’s—“

But Eijirou stopped himself short.

Surely telling Hana that Katsumi was the most special girl in the world to him because she was Katsuki’s daughter wouldn’t help anything. It would only tangle the two of them deeper into his and Hana’s toxic relationship. He didn’t need Katsuki or his daughter to be subject to this sort of abuse.

“What?” Hana pried, raising her brows with a smirk.

It seemed as if she already knew the answer. She was manipulative like that. Always asking questions she knew the answer to just to plot her next verbal assault.

She scoffed at Eijirou’s silence, obviously growing infuriated over the fact that he wouldn’t tell her what Katsumi actually meant to her. He found it insane that he had to justify his discomfort with her yelling at a five year old in the first place.

Hana walked forward until she was up in Eijirou’s face, “You’re even more pathetic than I imagined Eijirou. Playing house with another goddamn man. You think he gives a shit about you? You’re just a convenient babysitter. He’ll use you up and get bored.”

Eijirou shook his head, “You don’t know anything about him.”

“Yeah, but I know a whole lot about you. Trust me, he’ll get bored and go find someone fulfilling.”

He visibly winced at the woman’s words. God she always knew exactly what to say to break him. She was always the cut that bled, the knife in his back, the punch to the gut. She always broke him down when he found himself feeling in control of himself.

How did they ever work? How did he ever get stuck with such a horrible, abusive girlfriend. His mothers didn’t raise him this way.

He walked back to his front door and swung it open, “We’re done. Don’t call me, or text me, or try to get back together with me after this. I’m done.”

This time, opening the door seemed to work. This time Hana picked up her purse and flipped her hair back in frustration. This time she left with anger on her tongue, and words that he wouldn’t be able to forgive.

“He will never see you as anything more than a quick fuck.”

But this time was going to be the very last time he’d ever let her hurt him like this.

“Get out.”

—

Katsuki hadn’t seen Eijirou in a while. A solid two weeks had passed without so much as a wave through the shop windows from the redhead. It was strange, but nothing Katsuki wasn’t already used to. They texted back and forth, but there was a lack of the usual chaotic energy coming from the man.

He half wondered if it had to do with the kiss they shared, or if Eijirou regretted it. That thought alone was enough to have him completely voiding any thought of Eijirou at all.

The doorbell of the shop chimed, and Katsuki embarrassingly flicked his head to the door in hopes to see his favorite customer. God was he wrong.

“Hana,” he said, more out of surprise than confusion.

He hadn’t seen Hana in two weeks. The party with Eijirou’s friends had been the last time he’d seen her, and after Eijirou texted him last week saying they were broken up again, Katsuki thought that would be the last he’d seen of her.

Maybe they got back together again and this was some weird switch of roles here.

“Bakugou,” the brunette smirked. “So this is the flower shop.”

She looked around, lingering near the entrances and the windows. She hardly even looked at the flowers. Katsuki took a glance back at Deku who sat behind the counter with an equally confused face.

“Are you here for flowers?” Katsuki asked awkwardly.

Beyond the very obvious fact that he kissed Eijirou a few weeks ago, there was something about this situation that made Katsuki feel a bit uneasy, or untrusting. He was glad Katsumi was at school.

“Just browsing,” she shrugged her shoulders.

Katsuki nodded his head and followed her into the bouquet section. There weren’t any customers at the moment, which gave him enough of an excuse to lurk near her and see what she was doing here.

“Eijirou and I had a crazy night, figured I’d take a walk to cool off,” she laughed.

Ah, so she came to brag. Again, Katsuki just nodded his head with pursed lips. He had a sneaking suspicion that Hana would somehow convince Eijirou to get back together with her.

He’d been telling himself that all along to stop himself from getting his feelings hurt, yet somehow they’re still a bit bruised. Eijirou didn’t even tell him.

“Do you own this place?” She asked.

“Uh, yeah, for a little less than five years.”

“You know, it’s sort of funny. All of these flowers look so familiar. I think Eijirou has probably bought me one of each at this point,” she explained, though she really wasn’t looking at the flowers. She was looking at the walls. “Are you the one giving them to him?”

Katsuki wasn’t sure if he should admit that Eijirou was here often. He wasn’t sure if Eijirou had said something to Hana about the kiss, and she wanted to get the information for herself to see how she could manipulate him.

“I sell them, yeah.”

“So then you know that we fight a lot, don’t you?” She grinned, though it wasn’t in her eyes.

She was guiding him somewhere, morphing the conversation to get him to go where she needed him to be in order to get her way.

“That’s none of my business,” Katsuki shook he head.

“Good.”

He let out an awkward breath. Was that all? She just wanted to know if he knew they fought? Katsuki fixed his apron as she walked past him, heading back into the front of the store where the houseplants sat. Katsuki went to follow, but just as he started walking through the entryway of the main room Hana spun around on her heel, causing them to be face to face for a moment.

“Because he will always come crawling back to me. Even if he thinks he’s found someone else, he’ll always choose me.”

Oh.

/Oh/.

She was threatening him right now. She saw Katsuki as a threat to her for some reason. That’s why she came here, that’s why she was bragging about Eijirou.

“Okay,” he nodded his head.

Honestly, if Hana wanted to beef with Katsuki, that was her problem. One of the cool perks about being a dad is that he literally does not have time for stupid high school drama. So if Hana wanted to threaten him, or try to scare him then it’s whatever.

“On second thought, I would like a bouquet, go make me one,” she flicked her hands away. Literally shooing Katsuki towards the flower section again.

One looked at Deku rolling his own eyes and had Katsuki letting out a huff and heading towards the flowers. They’d dealt with a lot of bitchy women, so this was nothing.

He picked the bouquet out carefully.

Geraniums for stupidity, foxgloves for insincerity, and orange lilies for hatred, was the perfect bouquet for Hana in his eyes. He bundled them up quickly before heading back over to her.

“Here you go,” he raised his brows.

She seemed to be growing frustrated that there was really no power struggle between the two of them. She was probably hoping he’d lash out and give Eijirou a reason to hate him.

But Katsuki had been dragged through the fucking mud for the past five years. It was pretty difficult to get him to crumble now.

She swiped the flowers out of his hands aggressively, causing a few of the petals to fall to the ground.

“Stay away from him.”

“What?”

“Stay away from Eijirou.”

Katsuki reeled back at the bold claim. He didn’t know what to say once again, because he knew that whatever he did would probably only get Eijirou in more trouble.

“He’s an adult, he can decide for himself who he chooses to be around,” he settled on.

That wasn’t too harsh. It was honest at least. Someone had to tell her that Eijirou was his own person with his own thoughts and opinions on shit.

Maybe this was why Eijirou hadn’t been as active in their texts, or why he hadn’t been to the shop lately. Maybe he was dealing with Hana’s fucked up bullshit.

“Okay,” she nodded.

But it didn’t seem okay. It actually seemed to push her over the edge of whatever piece of sanity she had left.

“Do you think he’ll choose to be around you once he finds out you're transgender?”

Katsuki froze.

His eyes grew wide, stomach literally falling out of his ass. His hands went clammy, mouth dry, and suddenly he was back in a classroom and everyone was whispering about him, and what was between his legs and who was in his fucking womb—

“Or how about when he finds out you’re the idiot that got pregnant with Katsumi? Do you think any normal person wants to be around someone like that?”

His mouth was wide open but he couldn’t get a sound out. The fact that his daughter's name was even in her mouth was enough to make him feel like throwing up. He actually might throw up.

If Eijirou knew he was transgender he’d cut him off, and then Katsuki would have to explain to a crying five year old why Eiji doesn’t want to see her and more, and he’d be the reason his daughter had such a lonely existence /again/. Just like when she was born and nobody showed up to meet her, just like her first birthday spent alone, her first word going unnoticed to others. He’d fail her, he’d fail Eijirou, he’d fail everyone—

“Get out,” Deku was at his side before he could do anything, though he isn’t sure if he could even if he wanted to right now.

“Excuse me?” Hana laughed, finally satisfied in the response she’d received.

She thrived off of this shit. This was what Hana did, she scared people. She probably scared Eijirou.

“You heard me. Get out,” Deku shouted.

She left with a satisfied grin and a slam of the front doors, throwing the bouquet in the trash as she left.

“She’s gonna tell him,” Katsuki turned to look at his childhood best friend.

Deku grabbed his arms to stop Katsuki from moving, “No she’s not—“

Katsuki shrugged him off, looking frantically for his phone, because holy fuck he needed to call Eijirou and tell him he was trans before Hana did. Fuck, maybe he shouldn’t call, maybe he should go tell him in person right now? Was that where Hana was headed now? Was she going to tell Eijirou right now?

“She’s gonna fucking tell him and I’ll lose everyone again—“

“Kacchan!” Deku stopped him again.

“I have to go tell him,” he shouted.

“Who?” Deku shook his head in confusion.

“I have to tell Eijirou before she does,” he frantically grabbed the keys to his house and the flower shop.

How did she even know? Did someone tell her? Did he not pass? He’d worked so hard to gain muscle and stand up straight to look taller and—

Deku stood in front of the doors, stopping Katsuki from leaving the store.

“No, you don’t. Don’t let her force you to come out. Kirishima is a good guy. If he finds out it’s not going to be the end of the world,” he said softly.

Fuck, Deku was sort of right. He hated that. His hands were shaking, adrenaline running high. He’s never in his life felt like this before. Like something that was his was being ripped right out of his hands. Hana was taking Eijirou away. He’d never want to be around him after this.

“Kacchan, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Deku let out a sad sigh when he saw that what he was saying had little effect in soothing the blonde's anxiety. “Having a baby isn’t a crime, and Katsumi is wonderful. Kirishima wouldn’t hate you over something like this.”

Deku always knew what to say to comfort Katsuki. He knew exactly how to calm him down. But not right now. Not after Hana just exposed his deepest secret and flaunted it in his face.

“He will,” Katsuki croaked, reaching for the front door.

But Deku grabbed his hand and shook his head.

“Don’t go to Kirishima right now. Wait it out for a bit, okay? Think about what you really want to do.”

—

Let it be known that Katsuki did wait. He waited a week. A whole fucking seven days of worry, and dread, and fear, all while having to be a father to a five year old. It was the worst week of his life. Eijirou texted him every so often, sending memes, or stupid cat pictures, or asking when they could hang out next.

And every time he texted, Katsuki was sure it would be the last one. He was constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for Eijirou to go radio silent and drop off the face of his earth, waiting for Hana to tell his biggest secret.

But nothing ever happened, and somehow that made it worse.

Every Saturday, Camie insisted on taking Katsumi for a slumber party. She said that Katsumi needed girl time or whatever the fuck and explicitly stated that dads were not invited. Usually that was fine, Katsuki would tend to the plants at work and then have an evening to himself. He’d clean the house, order a pizza, and watch some movies.

Tonight was different though. Tonight he truly wished for the distraction of a five year old running rampant through his house.

Instead it was fucking silent, and all he could do was think about Eijirou or if he knew or if he cared. He was constantly checking his phone, constantly pacing around the house. It didn’t help that it was fucking raining outside and he could take a walk to clear his mind.

After the millionth drop of his guts in his stomach at the thought of what Hana said, Katsuki had truly had enough. This was his fucking life, he didn’t need to listen to Deku and stay home, and he sure as hell wouldn’t allow Hana to air his dirty laundry.

He picked up his house key, vaguely remembering the directions Eijirou had given him on how to get to his apartment from the flower shop, and stepped out into the pouring rain.

If Hana wanted the satisfaction of outing Katsuki to Eijirou, he’d make sure she couldn’t get it.

He’d do it first.

—

Perhaps coming over unannounced, in the middle of a really big rain storm wasn't his smartest move. What with the fact that his clothes were soaked by the time he got to Eijirou’s door, and his hair was so wet that it no longer poofed and instead dropped into his eyes.

But this was time sensitive.

When Eijirou opened the door he let out a surprised gasp, “Oh my god come in, it’s pouring!”

He yanked Katsuki inside before he could protest, which honestly he might’ve if the other man wasn't as fast. He was about to tell Eijirou something that a lot of cisgender men crinkled their noses in disgust upon hearing, and part of him wasn’t ready for that. Fuck he should’ve turned around and went home.

“What’s up man? This is super unexpected,” Eijirou half laughed as he shut the door.

“Sorry.”

He entered the apartment, with much less confidence than he’d had when he left his house. Somewhere during his ten minute walk to Eijirou’s apartment, that feeling of dread crept in and choked him out.

Because what would he do once he told Eijirou he was trans? What would he do once the man got grossed out and asked him to leave? What would he tell Katsumi when Eijirou stopped showing up?

“It’s okay, I’m happy to see you.”

But there was no going back now. He’d made it all the way here in the pouring rain.

“Have you talked to Hana recently?” He asked shakily.

What if he already knew? What if he’s known this whole time and Katsuki had just walked right into the trap? What if this was where Eijirou called him gross and said they shouldn’t be friends anymore?

“No, we broke up. She’s blocked on everything and she hasn’t come by my place.”

Katsuki nodded his head. He wasn’t sure if that made things better or worse. Now it just meant that he’d have to tell Eijirou, and watch as his initial, genuine reactions play out.

“She came to the shop the other day,” he mentioned.

Eijirou stiffened, face growing angry, “What? What did she say?”

Katsuki shook his head. He didn’t want to talk about that. It would only make Eijirou feel bad.

“I have to tell you something,” he said instead, cringing at how nervous his voice sounded.

Eijirou must’ve picked up on the seriousness of the situation, because soon he was walking towards the couch and beckoning Katsuki to follow.

“Okay, come sit down,” he said softly.

But Katsuki stayed out by the door, “No, I’d rather not.”

This way if things went bad, like they did in high school, he could turn around and run. He could walk out into the rain and cry his eyes out.

“Katsuki are you okay? What happened? Tell me what she did?” Eijirou asked.

There was so much concern in his voice, so much worry. Katsuki wasn’t sure he deserved that much care. He was keeping a dirty secret, and the only reason he was even telling Eijirou was because he felt forced to. Once he told Eijirou the truth everything would go south. He’d probably ruin the redhead’s day.

“I just— She’s going to tell you something about me. Something personal, like really fucking personal,” he explained quickly, breathing becoming more frantic as he continued.

Eijirou threw his hands up in the air, urging Katsuki to stop.

“Woah, woah, woah—“

But he continued anyways, thinking maybe if he could say it quickly it would hurt less. Or maybe Eijirou wouldn’t be able to fully process it and wouldn’t become violent when he found out Katsuki was a fucking liar.

“And I want you to hear it from me first before she tells you, so—“

“Katsuki stop!” Eijirou yelped.

He wasn’t sure when Eijirou left the living room and came back to the entrance of the apartment where Katsuki stood. Katsuki doesn’t remember seeing him move at all, too focused on the impending doom.

But Eijirou was there, right in front of him, holding both of Katsuki’s wrist like it was the only way to get the blonde's attention and get him to stop talking.

“Stop, don’t say anything more.”

Katsuki bit his lip. His heart was racing, jaw clenched tightly, face burning an awful shade of red, and all he could think of was how badly he didn’t want to do this right now.

He didn’t want Eijirou to know yet. He still wanted time with him. To be friends, to kiss again, to have picnics with Sumi. Whatever. He wanted more of it.

“Whatever it is I don’t want to know,” Eijirou told him breathlessly, as if Katsuki had physically stressed him out earlier. Then, as if he’d heard the way the sentence came out, he backtracked a bit. “I mean, I /do/ want to know at some point, but I want it to be on your terms.”

On his terms?

Katsuki let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. These were his terms. He was doing this right now because he wanted to. Because he needed to. Because if he didn’t Hana would, and then he’d have zero say in the reason he’d hidden it to begin with.

Eijirou continued, eyes wide as he spoke, “I don’t want you to tell me just because you feel forced to, or like you're in a race against my crazy ex girlfriend.”

“But she’ll tell you,” Katsuki felt his bottom lip wobble and he bit it to stop the stupid fucking emotion building in his chest.

Maybe he didn’t want to tell Eijirou yet. Maybe somewhere down the line of their friendship he’d tell the other man. When he was ready. On his own accord.

But Hana still knew, and he wasn’t stupid enough to believe that she wouldn’t go to extreme lengths to tell Eijirou if she really wanted to fuck with Katsuki.

“How? I have her blocked on everything and I changed the locks on the apartment. She won’t say shit to me,” Eijirou shook his head.

He removed his hands from Katsuki's wrist, and the blonde had to physically stop himself from trying to grab Eijirou again. Just to feel the man’s skin on his own. Just to convince himself that Eijirou wasn’t going to leave him, despite the fact that Katsuki was in his apartment.

“What if she finds you and tells you and then you…” His voice trailed off.

Katsuki knew it wasn’t fair to assume Eijirou would react poorly, but it’s all he’s ever known. Nobody in high school knew he was trans until he was pregnant. The father had told one of his friends, who spread the nasty rumor all throughout the school. People would look at him like he was some alien, some strange specimen that only existed in films.

His friends all drifted off, one by one. They’d make a new excuse, give a half assed reason as to why they never invited Bakugou out anymore, or why they couldn’t walk with him in the halls anymore.

Eventually he really only had Camie and Deku. Camie didn’t give a fuck because she was Camie and she loved everyone regardless. Deku had been his friend since he was four, before he’d transitioned, and had never cared.

“I won’t listen. I’ll put my fingers in my ears and scream until she leaves,” Eijirou snapped him out of the treacherous memories in his brain.

Katsuki couldn’t help but chuckle at the resolution, “That’s stupid.”

Eijirou huffed out a laugh of his own, “I tend to act stupid when you’re around.”

And just like that the mood felt lighter again. At least enough for the two of them to let out a sigh of relief.

“Are you okay?” The taller man asked, putting a hand on Katsuki's drenched shoulder.

His body was freezing, clothes soaking wet from rain, fingers shaking from the chill of the air conditioning hitting his wet skin. It didn’t help that the topic of discussion happened to be the most traumatizing experience of his life. He couldn’t help but shake a little as everything from five years ago came back ten times stronger.

Katsuki wondered if Eijirou was upset that he wasn’t ready to tell him whatever it was he was hiding. For all Eijirou knew, Katsuki could be hiding the fact that he was a serial killer, or something.

“It’s not that I don’t want to tell you personal stuff about me, it’s just,” he tried to explain, but he couldn’t get the words out.

Because it’s not about trust. It’s not that he doesn’t trust Eijirou, or want to tell him important stuff eventually.

“Hard?” The redhead supplied. Katsuki nodded his head silently. “I get it. Sometimes I get so scared to speak that it feels like my tongue is tied in a knot, and my stomach is full of bugs.”

He grabbed Katsuki's hand then, and the blonde had to pretend the touch didn’t feel like fire on his fingertips. Katsuki let him lead the two of them into the living room, back to the couch.

“Me too,” Katsuki admitted quietly.

“Yeah?” Eijirou raised a brow, sitting down.

“Yeah,” he confirmed. He sat down on the couch as well, despite the fact that his body was soaking wet.

Eijirou turned his head to the side, like Katsuki had said something unexpected, “I didn’t take you for someone who really got scared of anything.”

He couldn’t stop the half laugh that bubbled from his lips at the admission. Katsuki was always scared of everything. He lived a life full of fear. Fear of love, fear of failure, fear of letting down his daughter, fear of getting close to people only to have them leave.

But Eijirou didn’t know that. Eijirou only knew what Katsuki could tell him, and it sort of hit Katsuki then that maybe he hadn’t been a very good friend so far to Eijirou. He let the other man share personal parts of his life, only to shut him out entirely when it came to his own life.

“When Katsumi was born I ran away. Just me and her. I took her here, about four hours away from my hometown.”

He was scared then. Probably the most scared he’d ever been in his life. His parents had shunned him for getting pregnant, and he’d lost contact with Deku and Camie.

“Why?” Eijirou frowned.

“I just couldn’t face anyone again, you know? My parents were so angry at me, and I lost all of my friends. Nobody wanted to be friends with a father at eighteen.”

Katsuki had never told anyone about his parents and how they basically disowned him until Katsumi was two. They’ve since made up, and apologized, so he typically doesn’t dwell on it.

But it felt so easy to tell Eijirou. He didn’t raise his voice, or talk shit about his parents. He didn’t judge Katsuki for running away, or stage his opinion on what Katsuki should’ve done but ultimately didn’t do.

He just listened.

“What about her mom?” The redhead asked softly.

So he really didn’t know. Hana really hadn’t told him yet.

Now would be a good time to add that part of his history into the shit show of his life story.

But he can’t. He can’t handle the look of resentment that would overtake Eijirou’s face. He /can’t/.

“She doesn’t have one. It’s just been me and her,” he picked at a loose thread on his sweatpants.

At this point he’s sure Eijirou thought that Katsuki had a wife, or perhaps a girlfriend that had passed away, or wanted nothing to do with him and ‘Sumi. He isn’t entirely sure how he felt about that. Part of him was relieved, because at least that meant Eijirou really didn’t know about him.

But another part of him, the part of him that was eighteen, and went to the hospital all by himself, the part of him that remembered being handed the prettiest baby in the world and knowing that he’d created her, felt invalidated. They were talking about a woman that didn’t exist, someone else got the credit for what he’d done. For his proudest moment.

“What about Midoriya? You said the two of you were like brothers right? And he works with you.”

“I didn’t tell him anything,” Katsuki admitted, eyes downcast to hide the shame of how shitty and selfish he’d been when he was eighteen. “I had to drop out a month before graduation, and then I vanished. We didn’t reconnect until Katsumi was maybe a year old.”

Eijirou nodded his head, taking it all in. Not once did his eyes leave katsuki’s and he was grateful for it. Eijirou’s ruby irises calmed his shredding, burning scarlets.

“Why?” The redhead asked again.

Katsuki swallowed thickly. He wished he knew. He just felt like he had to get out. Out of that town, out of his parents' disappointed gazes, out of Deku and Camie’s overbearing worry. He just had to go, and have his baby and get used to how things would be for the rest of his life, without the added pressure of everyone else’s pity and disappointment.

“I guess I just felt like I disappointed everyone. And it’s really hard to look people in the eye once you’ve done that,” he admitted.

It was quiet for a while. Katsuki assumed it was because he’d unloaded a whole boatload of trauma onto someone who’s never even experienced having a child or picking up their life and flipping it upside down.

But as the time passed, it seemed like Eijirou was actually waiting. Like he wanted to make sure Katsuki got it all out. Like he was truly trying to help Katsuki process all of his baggage. He was holding onto it for him.

“You’re the greatest person I know,” Eijirou said after a while.

He put his hands on either of Katsuki's soaking knees and gave them a light squeeze of reassurance. Like he truly meant it, and everything Katsuki had just told him didn’t change that.

“Thanks I guess,” Katsuki shrugged his shoulders.

He doesn’t believe it, or course. How could he after everything he’s done. There’s nothing great about a kid going against his parents wishes and cutting off his only two friends that ever cared about him. There’s nothing amazing about the fact that he took Katsumi away from her grandparents and her aunt and uncle for the early years of her life, just because he was selfish.

He let out a shaky sigh, “There’s more shit, but it’s really fucking hard to talk about.”

Even saying that brings this immense sense of guilt about what a shitty fucking person he truly was. Eijirou was sitting here on a Saturday night, getting his couch soaked by some dude who decided to run inside and dump trauma on him.

And he can’t even tell him he’s trans. He can’t even get the truth out or muster up the courage to elude it. The words just won’t come out. God he’s the fucking worst.

“I get it,” Eijirou softly strokes one of Katsuki’s legs. “When you’re ready I’ll be listening, to you and you only.”

He was promising Katsuki he wouldn’t listen to anything Hana would say. Reminding him that when Katsuki was ready to share that intimate information he’d be ready to listen.

“Thank you,” Katsuki nodded.

He didn’t stop Eijirou when he started to wipe the wet strands of Katsuki's blonde hair off of his face. He didn’t stop him when he moved closer and leaned his head against Katsuki's shoulder either. Eijirou was definitely getting his clothes soaked too with the way he leaned against Katsuki.

“Where’s my ‘Sumi Sooms tonight?” Eijirou asked.

Katsuki smiled at the way his nickname for his daughter rubbed off on Eijirou too.

“Aunt Camie’s. They have a sleepover every Saturday night for girl talk. I’m not invited.”

They shared a laugh at that.

After a moment where the only sound was the water dripping from Katsuki's body onto the hardwood floors, Eijirou placed his chin on Katsuki's shoulder, and stared at his face.

When the blonde turned to meet his gaze, Katsuki was reminded of the very fact that they kissed. He was close enough to count each of Eijirou’s lashes if he wanted to. Close enough to feel the warmth of the other man’s skin against his freezing cold skin. Close enough to kiss him if he leaned in.

“Do you want to shower? Maybe borrow some clothes?” Eijirou asked, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

Katsuki could already feel that scrambled feeling in his stomach again. Because he shouldn’t. He should go home and sleep in his bed alone. Hana was threatening him. She wanted him to stay away and this was the very opposite of that.

But he nodded his head anyway and followed Eijirou to his bathroom.

Eijirou turned the shower on, and gathered a spare change of clothes for Katsuki to put on when he was done. After thanking him, he locked the door, and only once he was absolutely sure the other man left did he take off all of his clothes.

He stared at himself in the mirror for a long time. Long enough that the mirror started to fog and he could hardly make out the scars on his chest, and the scar on his lower stomach. The scars that reminded everyone he wasn’t what he said he was.

The shower water was warm, and there was a scent of Eijirou as soon as he stepped in. His body wash smelt of bourbon, and his shampoo was a soft honey. It was like he was fully encapsulated in the other man.

There were no watermelon bath bubbles, or strawberry tear free shampoo on the edge of the bathtub. There were no tiny scribbles of ‘I love you daddy’ or ‘I love you more ‘Sumi’ on the tiled walls from shower safe crayons. Nor were there piles of rubber ducks of dolls with wet hair setting at the corners of the bathtub.

Because there isn’t supposed to be, he has to remind himself. Katsuki had to keep reminding himself of that every time Eijirou did something nice like this.

Eijirou didn’t want to be anyone’s father. Eijirou was a normal twenty three year old, looking for something fun, something casual. He couldn’t handle all of Katsuki, and his baggage, and his daughter.

“Feel a little better?” The redhead asked once Katsuki stepped into his bedroom.

The clothes were ridiculously huge on Katsuki, to the point that the drawstring of the sweats had to be fully tightened and the shirt might as well be considered long sleeved. Eijirou had changed into pajamas too, though his fit much nicer. His vibrant red hair fanned out on the pillow.

Suddenly being here made Katsuki feel extremely guilty. Wearing Eijirou’s clothes, using his shampoo, dumping all of his pain and suffering onto him for no reason at all.

It wasn’t casual of Katsuki.

“I’m fine.”

He sat on the other end of the bed, watching as Eijirou scrolled aimlessly through social media. Every once in a while Katsuki would spot someone he knew, like Sero, or Denki. For a moment their worlds weren’t so catastrophically different, and Katsuki wondered if in another life he could sit with Eijirou and do nothing more than scroll through Instagram in their pajamas.

After a while the redhead dropped the phone on his chest and let it slide down onto the bed. Then he stared up at Katsuki.

“I’m really sorry that Hana was mean to you today.”

The blonde shook his head. Honestly, it wasn’t the fact that Hana was mean that made him upset. He’d dealt with assholes his entire life. What really bothered him was what she was trying to do to his relationship with Eijirou. Whatever that even was.

“I’m used to it,” he shook his head.

“Well you shouldn’t be. You didn’t deserve that,” Eijirou frowned, sliding one of his arms over to touch Katsuki.

His arm just barely reached Katsuki at his spot on the edge of the bed. He should move closer. There was nothing more he wanted than to be touched by the other man, in anyway the other was willing to give.

“Neither do you,” Katsuki stated the obvious fact that Eijirou so often forgot.

The redhead slid over a fraction of the bed so his hand could trail down Katsuki’s back softly. So softly. Katsuki had half a mind to wonder if he’d still do that once he knew.

Part of him thinks that maybe Eijirou would be okay with it. But the logical part of himself usually reminds him that he’d thought the same thing of his boyfriend in high school. That was a heartbreak he couldn’t even begin to relive. Even through memories.

“I know that now. You showed me that,” Eijirou smiled softly.

Katsuki hummed in response, letting his eyes trail over the man that Eijirou was. All broad muscles, and tanned skin. Soft faced and kind hearted. He couldn’t help but lean down, contorting his body until his legs were folded off to the side and he sat to the side of Eijirou’s right hip.

Even up close there wasn’t a single thing Katsuki could point out as flawed. Eijirou was beautiful. He was everything Katsuki was not, and somehow Eijirou still thought Katsuki was amazing. He didn’t understand it.

Eijirou raised a hand to cup Katsuki’s face, pulling him down the rest of the way to softly place a kiss on the man’s lips. His lips were warm as they pressed against Katsuki’s and he leaned in deeper to make sure he never forgot them.

Kissing Eijirou would probably never get old. Even when Katsuki became an inevitable fling of the other man’s crazy twenties, he would probably always remain Katsuki’s unwavering dream.

When his tongue teased Katsuki's bottom lip, he parted them willingly and groaned at the feeling of Eijirou’s tongue against his own. Their skin was hot, breath just as humid as the air in the shower earlier. Katsuki was sure if there was a mirror nearby it might be fogged.

He didn’t move from his spot, leaned over Eijirou, even when the man tried to pull him closer. Eijirou didn’t seem to mind though. He didn’t push, or shove. Didn’t tell Katsuki what to do with his body when. He let Katsuki take the lead and followed suit.

It probably wasn’t fair, and maybe a bit odd, the way Katsuki was almost scared of the other man’s touch. But insecurity far outweighed his desire in this moment, and it made sure to keep his body at bay.

“Let me take care of you,” Katsuki murmured against Eijirou’s lips.

He ran his hands down to feel the bulge in the redheads pants, earning a sharp breath from the man below him. When he turned back Eijirou nodded his head in response, face flushed with what Katsuki could only assume was a bit of embarrassment.

The smaller man settled between Eijirou’s legs, pulling down the waist band of his sweats and boxers in one go.

Fuck he was huge.

The blonde took his time inching down the other man’s length, getting used to the feeling again. Eijirou ran his fingers through his hair, pulling a groan from his throat as the man’s cock was pressed deeper into his throat.

Katsuki didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. It was probably a really, /really/ bad idea with everything going on.

But he didn’t fucking care.

Because maybe next week Hana would be back, and Katsuki would have to pretend that that was okay.

Maybe next week Eijirou would find out Katsuki was trans, and he’d cut him out of his life just like everyone else.

Maybe he'd lose the redhead because of Katsuki’s own resentment towards casual, sexually explicit affairs.

So like hell was he stopping now.

He let Eijirou take the lead, tugging on his hair every so often, building a steady pace as he all but fucked into Katsuki’s eager mouth. Drool dropped from his lips and landed on the tan expanses of Eijirou’s hips. Katsuki’s fingers dug into the tops of the bigger man’s thighs. His entire body was caged in by the other man’s muscular legs. He fit like he belonged there, like Katsuki was meant to be right between the redhead’s legs forever.

He’d take as much as possible. He’d risk it all if it meant one night. One night where he could completely indulge, one night where it didn’t matter that he had a daughter. One night where he could crawl into Eijirou’s bones and sink into his skin.

“Fuck, Katsuki I’m close,” Eijirou said shakily.

His hand trembled at its spot in Katsuki's hair, gripping a little tighter when he felt his orgasm approaching. Katsuki hummed in response, hollowing out his cheeks and sucking down harder.

This could be bad. So, so bad, but maybe Katsuki wanted to find out just how bad it could be. Maybe for once he just wanted to be a selfish twenty three year old. It could be the total wrong thing to do right now and he honest to god wouldn’t care.

Because it was Eijirou, and his face was contorted up in a look of absolute ecstasy as Katsuki swallowed him down, and his fingers were wound gently in his blonde hair like it mattered— like Katsuki was meant to be treated gently.

When the redhead came it was with Katsuki's name on his lips, and his dick buried deep in the back of the blonde's throat. He swallowed every drop of cum, pulling off slowly as Eijirou’s sensitive body shook in overstimulation.

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever witnessed in my life,” the redhead panted as he ran his fingers through Katsuki’s hair.

Nobody had ever in his life called him hot. When he was in high school, his boyfriend at the time had absolutely nothing nice to say about his body, and now he was older and a father, and well fathers typically didn’t get called hot on the daily.

Part of him felt like crying, and another part of him felt like laughing because something as simple as being validated sexually was enough to have him tearing up.

But he didn’t do either of those things, because this was all casual. And he really didn’t want to scare Eijirou away by reading too much into it.

Instead Katsuki crawled above the other man and kissed him again. Eijirou made a sound at first, likely not too happy with the taste in the blonde's mouth, but after a moment he was wrapping those calloused hands around Katsuki’s waist and squeezing gently.

“What about you?” The redhead murmured against his lips.

And fuck, he was wet. If he had an ounce less of self control he’d be on the other man’s cock in seconds.

But Eijirou didn’t know the truth about his body, and Katsuki was fine with keeping it that way. Anything to keep the other man around longer.

“I’m fine,” Katsuki bit the man’s bottom lip and pulled teasingly.

It was selfish, so selfish to stay here and hide himself from the man who’s done nothing but treat him with kindness.

Eijirou turned them so they were on their sides, and Katsuki silently gave a bit of distance between them. The last thing he needed was for the other man to notice Katsuki wasn’t hard himself. He didn’t want to have to explain that he couldn’t get hard because he didn’t have a stupid dick, because he was trans.

“Are you sure?” Eijirou’s voice was soft as a hand traveled down the dip of his waist.

No, he wasn’t sure. He wasn’t sure if anything anymore. Part of him wanted to just do it. Just shred off his clothes and show Eijirou the truth.

But he’s scared.

He’s scared of what’ll happen once Katsuki’s clothes come off, and he’s not what the redhead expected. He’s terrified of what his body will look like below someone as perfect as Eijirou.

Katsuki couldnt risk it, he couldn’t lose Eijirou, even if he’d only ever have him for just this one night. If this was all he’d get, then he’d manage. At least he’d be able to stay friends with the other man and watch as he found happiness with someone else from the sidelines.

“Shut up and kiss me more.”

He should feel content, or at least satisfied that he finally stepped out of his comfort zone and blew off some steam. This was the first time since Katsumi was born that Katsuki had even felt the slightest urge to do something sexual. It almost feels like his first time all over again. This probably should’ve been a happier moment. He’d finally done casual. Finally did what other people his age did without shame. A random hookup.

But all Katsuki could think was that he lied. He was a liar under his clothes, and someone else knew that. He was keeping something from Eijirou, lying to him in his own bed. He felt dirty, and unworthy, and disgusting. He felt everything he felt when he was in high school, and it wasn’t Eijirou’s fault. Eijirou was the one that made him feel special.

It was himself.

Katsuki didn’t deserve to hold someone like Eijirou. Not when he kept so many secrets from the other man.

About his body.

About his life.

About his feelings for Eijirou.

—

Eijirou woke up the next morning to a slew of curse words, followed by a resounding thud on the hardwood floor of his bedroom.

He sat up in the bed, squinting his eyes in the early morning light.

“Did you just fall?”

“No,” Katsuki denied a little too quickly. He stood up from his spot on the ground, the spot he definitely didn’t fall at, and continued the tedious task of shoving on his shoe. “A little. I gotta go I overslept.”

“Where are you going?” Eijirou rolled out of bed.

He was leaving so soon? Especially after the night the two of them shared, both emotionally and sexually.

But then again, Katsuki only viewed this as something casual right? He’d said he’d never done casual before, but that’s what this was.

“I have to run home and grab my car so I can pick up ‘Sumi from Camie’s place. I was supposed to be there twenty minutes ago,” the blonde explained as he shoved his other shoe on.

“Let me drive you,” Eijirou wiped the sleeve from his eyes and tugged his shirt back on. He must’ve taken it off when they fell asleep.

“What? No, go back to sleep, it's my kid, my responsibility.”

“It’ll be faster if I drive you,” he shooed the other out the door.

—

Camie lived in a nice part of the suburbs, about ten minutes out of the city where Katsuki and Eijirou lived. It was only about a fifteen minute drive from Eijirou’s place, which only made them a little over a half hour late.

“Sorry we’re late,” Katsuki sighed as his friend opened the door.

“No worries she slept in anyways,” the woman smiled. Then she peered behind Katsuki to Eijirou. “Who’s this?”

“I’m Kirishima Eijirou,” he introduced himself.“You’re Camie, right? I’ve heard a lot about you.”

For a second the woman stood there absolutely stunned. She looked at Eijirou, then Katsuki, then back at Eijirou again. Mouth slightly open, eyes wide, like Eijirou might be a figment of her imagination.

“Did you go on a date last night?” Camie squealed.

Katsuki put a hand up and closed his eyes in annoyance, “No, that’s not what this is.”

Eijirou pretended the instant denial didn’t hurt his feelings.

That’s how things went he supposed. Katsuki didn’t want to date anyone. He didn’t want to get serious with anyone and he’d made that clear from the moment they’d met.

He just didn’t realize how much it would hurt to be casual.

And he didn’t realize how badly he wanted to be more until he was up close with /more/. Making out with Katsuki, having vulnerable conversations, literally sleeping together, and fooling around. He wanted all of it all at once.

But he knew it was selfish to ask Katsuki for more. Especially after everything the man had shared with him last night. It’s only been five years since Katsumi was thrown into the blondes life. Katsuki was probably just starting to find his footing in the world again.

“Daddy!”

That familiar voice filled the hall as Katsumi sprinted down. She jumped straight into her fathers arms, backpack flailing about as she did.

“Soomsooms,” Katsuki cooed in that special, fatherly voice he only used when he talked to his daughter. “Did you have fun?”

It was strange, the way Katsuki’s soft voice made his heart fill to the brim. Somehow Eijirou had gotten used to the switch between his usual gruff, gravelly voice, and his soothing one he used only for Katsumi. It was like he got to take a peek into the other man’s world. One that only few people were allowed to see.

“Yeah, we made cookies,” Sumi smiled brightly, motioning to the box of cookies Camie grabbed from the table inside.

Katsuki feigned a surprised gasp, “For me?”

“Yeah, they’ve got orange frosting because it’s your favorite,” his daughter nodded excitedly.

Eijirou felt his chest swell as he watched the interaction.

How could anyone ever look at Katsuki and Katsumi and choose to walk away.

Last night he’d told him everyone left him. All of his friends, his parents, from the sounds of it even Camie and Deku gave him space when he vanished. Eijirou can’t imagine not seeing these two in his life.

“Thank you,” Katsuki hummed before pressing a kiss to the girls temple.

He doesn’t know how Katsuki got up every morning and still acted like such a wonderful father everyday. After everything he’d told Eijirou last night, Eijirou can’t even begin to understand how much courage it must take to keep going.

And somehow, there’s more. Katsuki had told him last night that there was more than what he was telling, but that it was hard to talk about.

How could anything be worse than all of his friends leaving him, and the mother of Katsumi wanting nothing to do with them, and his parents basically shutting him out at eighteen?

“Eiji,” the little girl gasped in her fathers arms upon seeing him standing behind them.

She reached her tiny little fingers out to him, wanting nothing more than to hug him. It physically made his chest ache. Such a sweet little girl, with so much love to give, and she chose to share some of it with Eijirou.

“Hi ‘Sumi,” he smiled softly as she settled into his arms.

She squeezed his neck tightly, with all of her strength, making sure he knew just how happy she was to see him. He wondered if she knew the feeling was mutual. He wondered how he could possibly tell a five year old he’d met only months ago that she was the most important little girl in his world.

And how did such an amazing child rise out of all of this mess? Katsuki was truly amazing. A good father, a good role model. He was one of the good ones as his mothers would say. He did such a good job being his daughter's protector.

But who protected him? And not in a way that supports the notion that Katsuki Bakugou needed protection, but in the idea that everyone is deserving of someone who can take care of them when they’re down. Eijirou had a feeling that deep down Katsuki might need that.

But he’s not so sure Katsuki would let him be that, no matter how bad Eijirou wanted to be. He was so quiet in his pain. You’d never even know he was suffering so much.

“I’m hungry,” Sumi said, matter of factly.

“You didn’t feed my child?” Katsuki glared at Camie.

“She just woke up, I got her dressed and brushed her teeth!”

“You wanna get breakfast,” Eijirou raised his brows.

The little girl gasped, “Yeah! With you Eiji! Can we daddy?”

Katsuki pulled the little girl's backpacks around one of his shoulders and took the box of cookies from Camie, ignoring the knowing look the woman gave the both of them.

It didn't hit Eijirou until now that Katsuki was still engulfed in his clothing. He found that he liked him like that. All bundled up in Eijirou. It was like he could inadvertently tell the world that Katsuki was his without actually having to say it and risk getting caught by the blonde himself.

The blonde sighed, before smiling softly at the wall of all things.

“I guess that’s fine.”

Chapter Text

Every month, Katsuki’s shop asks for donations. People can bring in old pots, dead plants, plants they no longer want, watering cans, soil bags. Basically anything they want. And every month he spends one work day with Deku, sorting through a bunch of shit, wondering why he even interacts with the community.

This month was no different, except for the fact that Eijirou had come to visit.

Which is fine. Really, it’s fine.

It’s not like every time Eijirou talked Katsuki stared at his mouth and remembered last week, when he’d kissed him. It’s not like every time the man got too close he remembered going down on him in the soft bedroom light. It’s not like every time Eijirou smiled softly, Katsuki was reminded of how well the other man accepted his past, or at least the small details he’d allowed himself to share.

It’s totally fine. Katsuki was fine.

Except maybe it wasn’t all that fine. Because now katsuki was officially in a little too deep. His heart jumped any time Eijirou so much as reached for a pot and those strong arms brushed past. His stomach scrambled when he smelt the man’s cologne, his jaw tightened when he watched him be so kind to his daughter, his brain screamed when he was nice to Deku.

So yeah, katsuki’s in a little too deep with a guy who wants to keep things casual.

“Daddy, ask him,” Katsumi tugged at his pant leg.

“I will,” he shooed her away.

But the little girl persisted, “Do it now!”

“Okay Katsumi,” he raised a brow in warning.

He hated when he had to be a dad and scold her. Luckily she skittered away at the first signs of her father getting serious with her.

Eijirou gave him a confused look before laughing. He and Deku were picking dead leaves off of a plant that was basically completely dead, save for a single vine that somehow persevered.

“Do you want to come to Katsumi’s recital?” He sighed.

Eijirou gasped excitedly, “Yes! When?”

“It’s on Saturday, at my school,” Katsumi jumped up and down.

The redhead smiled at his daughter softly, “I wouldn’t miss it for the world!”

Katsumi did her little happy dance, before picking up her toy watering can and wandering off to the outdoor plants. Once Katsuki was sure his daughter was still in his line of sight he turned to look at Eijirou.

“You don’t have to go.”

“Are you kidding? I’d love to see her dance. I’m gonna record it,” the redhead smiled.

He didn’t really know how to feel about it.

Other than that this was scary.

Katsuki had always promised himself he wouldn’t let a guy into his life when Katsumi was still so young and needed her father.

But somehow Eijirou had sneaked himself into both Katsuki and his daughter’s lives.

And he didn’t know what to do to stop it.

“Hey, do you want to go out tonight?”

Other than what he always did when things got too close for comfort.

Which was to create distance.

“Can’t,” Katsuki shook his head.

“Why not?” The redhead pouted as he wiped his hands off on his shirt.

He grabbed his backpack, obviously getting ready to head to work for the day. He’d only come to help in the morning, which Katsuki had told him he didn’t have to. Of course Eijirou did though. He was kind like that.

“Gotta watch ‘Sooms.”

And Katsuki was a monster.

A man who lied, who pushed, who ruined good things.

“‘Sooms can come. We can grab dinner,” Eijirou tried.

But Katsuki just bit the inside of his lip and shook his head, “It’s a no tonight.”

“Fine,” Eijirou sighed. He didn’t seem all too let down by Katsuki’s rejection. “I’ll see you Saturday though right?”

“Right,” Katsuki nodded. “For Katsumi.”

Eijirou left, and Katsuki continued walking to the rack of dead plants he needed to revive.

“What was that all about?” Deku raised a brow.

Katsuki gave him a look, as if to say he had no idea what Deku was talking about. But truthfully he did. He always knew what Deku was talking about, and annoyingly enough Deku was always one step ahead of Katsuki's self-destructive plans.

“Katsumi is going to our place tonight, we just talked about it not even thirty minutes ago,” the man rolled his eyes.

“Drop it Deku,” Katsuki took a pot from the storage rack and grabbed a bag of soil before dropping it a bit too hard on the work table.

“You’re doing it again,” Deku said, as if he’d just found out a hidden mystery.

This was no mystery at all. This was what Katsuki did every time anybody got too close to him.

He pushed.

“I’m not doing shit,” Katsuki shook his head.

Because this time it was different. This time he was pushing early, creating distance early on in their relationship so Eijirou would lose interest early, and leave early.

And then nobody would get hurt.

“No. You are. You’re closing up again, and this guy’s actually /good/.”

“Fucking drop it,” he hissed at Deku as he scooped some soil into a pot.

Deku handed him a hand held shovel as he continued, “I can’t! There’s obviously something there so what is it? Why’re you punishing yourself?”

Katsuki slammed his hands down on the table in frustration. He let out a shaky breath before glaring at his best friend.

He fucking hated when Deku did this. He /always/ did this. Always begged Katsuki to make better choices, always tried to steer him in a direction he didn’t want to go in.

But Katsuki knew what he was doing. He always knew what he was doing.

The minute they handed him a baby girl in the hospital he knew his life was merely an extension of hers. His choices all directly affected Katsumi’s whole life, even if it was a small fraction of his own. Where he bought groceries, what baby formula he used, how he dressed and how he dressed her, how present he was in a moment. It all affected his daughter.

That meant Eijirou did too.

And he could already tell that Katsumi is getting too close to him. Close enough that her heart will break once Eijirou realizes Katsuki was a bad idea and leaves.

“I can’t break Katsumi’s heart. I /can’t/,” he cringed at the mere thought.

“I already failed her by having her so young, and not being prepared or giving her a mother, or a proper family.”

He swallowed thickly. There’s so much he’d have done differently. For starters, if it had been possible, he would’ve started his family later in life when he had more money, and more of a clue what the fuck he was doing with his own. He would’ve given Katsumi another dad, and would've shown her what a healthy relationship with her grandparents looked like.

But he can’t change what he’s already done. So he has to protect what peace he can bring to his daughter, which means she needs some stability in her life.

“I can’t fail her again, by having a man come into her life and then leave her. She never needs to know how that feels.

Because Katsuki knew all too well how it feels to be forgotten. He knows what it feels like to be tossed to the side, like unwanted garbage and then completely forgotten about. He remembered begging his boyfriend to stay, to love him, to help him raise Katsumi. He remembered pleading with his parents to talk to him, to help him figure out how he was going to have a baby in nine months. He remembered all of his friends vanishing from his life, and pushing Camie and Deku away too because he didn’t know what else to do if he wasn’t running from the fear of being hurt.

And Katsumi will never know that pain if he can help it.

Deku looked at him with sad eyes, like he was disappointed that things still hadn’t changed, that Katsuki still hadn’t changed.

But this shit doesn’t heal overnight. Camie and Deku may have re-entered his life, and his parents might’ve apologized and tried to get on board for Katsumi, but he still remembers. He’s still scared that someone else will walk into his life and rock that boat, until Katsumi falls in too and they’re both drowning.

“You haven’t failed her Kacchan, she’s such a happy kid. That child is so in love with the life you’ve given her, how could you ever say you’re a failure.”

He shook his head. When Deku came back all Katsuki did was cry about this. About not being a good dad, about not having it together, about being lonely and not knowing what to do. He was tired of the same conversations with the man.

Especially when it had to do with his love life.

“It’s not like that for him. I’m just the dude with the daughter that he flirts with when nobodies looking,” he picked the shovel up and started to scoop through the dirt again, just to give his hands something to do.

Anything to not think about the fact that he isn’t more to Eijirou. Anything to ignore the fact that he /wanted/ to be more with Eijirou.

“Which is fine. I can handle that. Katsumi however, doesn't deserve that. She deserves consistency in her life for once, so I can’t.”

He picked up the dilapidated pothos plant that was donated to the shop, and pressed it into the soil.

“Kacchan,” Deku put his hand on the rim of the pot, trying to gain his attention. “I don’t think that’s true. He comes here everyday to see you and your daughter. That feels like more than flirting for the thrill of it.”

The blonde shook his head. Even if it was, it was only a matter of time before it all fell apart. Eijirou still didn’t know he was trans, but eventually he’d find out and probably hate him. Eventually it would all become too much for him and he’d back off like everyone else.

“And it kind of seems like it’s more than that for you too,” Deku mumbled.

“It’s not,” he snapped.

“Not everyone is out to screw you over—“

“He doesn’t /know/,” he raised his voice, but quickly remembered where he was. He turned to see if any customers noticed before lowering his tone.

“He doesn’t know about any of it. About me, or ‘Sooms, or anything. And I’m perfectly fine with keeping him there. He doesn’t need to know about my shitshow.”

“Because you’re scared he’ll leave once he finds out?” Deku supplied.

Katsuki glared daggers at him. He already knew the answer, but Katsuki wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of saying it.

Deku fucking pissed him off.

In some ways maybe he was jealous. Deku had done it all right and lived a pretty good life now. Other than the fact that he moved away from his hometown to chase after his loser best friend who ran away from home.

He had a girlfriend who was kind, a nice apartment in the city, and a dog. His life was easy. Bad things didn’t happen to him.

Well, except for Katsuki. Katsuki was his bad thing. Katsuki abandoned him and gave no signs as to where he went. Deku had to search for him for two years until he finally figured out where he was.

And somehow he still cared about Katsuki. Why? Why can’t he just let Katsuki let him go? Why does he torture himself?

Deku sighed before placing a hand over Katsuki's. Katsuki pulled it away immediately because he knew he’d fucking tear up if they had this conversation again.

But Deku said it anyway.

“One day, someone will look at you with so much love and acceptance, and they won’t even care if you’re cis or trans or somewhere in between. They’ll just understand that that’s a part of you and your story.”

Katsuki squeezed his eyes shut, trying and failing to ignore his best friend.

“I really hope when you find that person you’re not stupid enough to let it go,” Deku told him.

—

Eijirou, true to his word, showed up at Katsumi's performance right on time, and with a trail of idiots tagging along behind him. He’d brought Mina, Denki, Sero and Sero’a boyfriend Todoroki and they sat directly behind Katsuki, Camie, Deku and his parents who’d drive the four hours to watch Katsumi.

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t surprised that Eijirou showed up. It felt so silly, inviting him to his daughter's dance recital. He probably had more important shit going on in his life than Katsuki’s daughter dancing on a Saturday night.

But he did show up, and he did record the whole dance, and he did scream for Katsumi when she did her little solo, and his idiot squad cheered along with Eijirou.

And Katsuki would also be lying if he said he didn’t tear up just a little bit when he saw his daughter dancing on stage in her tiny little ballet slippers and white tutu. Because that was his tiny human that he made, and he swore to god she’d just been learning how to crawl last week, and saying her first word yesterday.

When her recital ended the parents were ushered outside to wait for their children and Katsuki had the awkward delight of introducing his new friends to his parents.

“Katsuki, who are these people?” His mother asked with a raised brow.

“Oh, uh, these are my—“ Katsuki pointed to them, but then got shy. Are they his friends? They’re Eijirou’s friends, they’re probably only here because Eijirou made them come.

“People,” he said awkwardly.

Mina let out a laugh, before pulling him into a hug, “God forbid he calls us his friends.”

“I’m Kirishima Eijirou,” extended a hand for Katsuki's mother to shake. “Me and Katsuki are good friends.”

“Good friends?” The man’s father raised his eyebrows before looking over towards his wife worriedly.

The women let out a sigh before eyeing Eijirou up and down, “Katsuki’s last ‘good friend’ made him a father—“

“Mom,” Katsuki groaned in embarrassment.

Eijirou faked a friendly smile, while his brain quickly tried to understand what that meant. Obviously he understood that Katsuki’s past girlfriend got pregnant and then handed Katsumi off to him.

But why on earth did she say that in front of everyone. Was it cruel? Or was she just a brutally honest person? Was she joking? Or was this some way of shaming Katsuki? He couldn’t make it out really. Part of him truly believed that katsiki’s mom might just be really overprotective of him. It was obvious she loved him by the way she asked if he was eating, or taking care of himself as well. But there was some sort of underlying discomfort for the both of them that he picked up on right away.

Growing pains, he thought. Maybe it was hard for Katsuki's mother to live with her choices, and Katsuki’s choices. Maybe it was hard to see Katsuki living the life he chose, when she’d been a mother who had different dreams for him.

He wasn’t sure. Eijirou knew their relationship was strained, but this brought a new level of confusion to it.

“Daddy, Daddy,” a familiar little voice pulled everyone’s attention.

Katsumi sprinted to Katsuki, dressed in her white tutu and tight hair bun. She jumped into his arms like that’s what they were made for, and her father wasted no time picking her up and attacking her with kisses.

“Sumi Sooms,” the blonde cooed his usual nickname for his daughter. “You killed it.”

“I killed it,” she squealed.

Soon their friends crowded Sumi and Katsuki. They congratulated her for her performance, complimented her outfit, ogled at her adorableness, and commemorated Katsuki’s ability to somehow tame his daughter's spiky hair.

And all Eijirou could do was feel proud.

He was proud of Katsumi of course, for getting up on a big stage and dancing in front of a bunch of people. Eijirou wasn’t sure he could do that even if he tried.

But really he was proud of Katsuki. Proud of the man standing in a sea of other parents, because Eijirou knew that Katsuki was the best one. He held his daughter like he was made for it, and spoke to her so softly, so lovingly, protecting her from the rash reality lingering all around them. One day she’d know. She’d learn that her grandparents were cruel to Katsuki and were perhaps so overbearing that he felt he had no other choice but to run. One day she’d experience heart break, or sadness.

One day Katsumi would see that her father tried so hard to keep her world peaceful.

And Eijirou couldn’t help but fall more and more in love with Katsuki as he stood there with him.

At the first sight of a yawn coming from the little girl, Katsuki shooed away their friends and handed her to his father. He gave his mother something that looked to be like a child size travel back, which caused Eijirou to eye him peculiarly.

“Sooms isn’t going home with you?” Eijirou frowned.

He was sort of hoping to take Katsumi to dinner to celebrate her first recital.

“Ah, no,” Katsuki shook his head with a dejected smile. “Since my parents took the four hour drive down they’re going to take Katsumi back to my home town for a few days.”

He didn’t sound particularly upset by the fact that his daughter was going away with his parents for the weekend, but still Eijirou could feel that Katsuki wasn’t excited about it. He would probably never say it, but somehow they’d spent enough time together for Eijirou to notice every feeling the other man was having.

And right now it sort of looked like the man’s baseline feeling of fear. The same fear, or rather worry he always had etched into his face. As if he was silently begging the world to give Katsumi a safe drive, or a good stay with her grandparents. Or perhaps he was silently begging his parents to do it right this time. To make sure Katsumi was treated wonderfully despite how messy things had gotten when she came about.

“You’re not going with?” He asked the blonde gently.

Gently, because he understood to a certain extent. When Katsuki had laid a heavy piece of his heart out for Eijirou a week ago, he’d made sure it wasn’t in bad taste. He’d made sure to remember every detail, every piece that hurt Katsuki to admit.

The blonde shook his head quietly. Eijirou could tell that it was taking the blonde a lot of strength to handle this maturely.

“Nah, it’s too hard.”

Eijirou didn’t know much about Katsuki’s parents, other than the fact that they cut their ties with him when Katsumi was born and they didn’t reconcile for an entire year. He could only assume that brought a lot of pain. Pain that couldn’t be fixed in the five years it’s been, but could be mitigated in order to give his daughter grandparents.

And Katsuki was usually sacrificial like that. He’d do whatever he had to do to make his daughter comfortable and happy, even if it brought him so much pain.

The blonde was quick to change the subject as their friends started to gather back towards the two of them.

“Thanks for coming out. You guys truly made her— our night. It’s usually just me and her so…”

He shrugged his shoulders, awkwardly trying to end the conversation. It was obvious he truly was grateful, but Katsuki did this thing where he clammed up the minute things got too hard to talk about. Eijirou had expected him to close up at the mere thanks, so the fact that he actually admitted he was usually riding solo for events was a step closer towards him accepting Eijirou’s friends as at least some form of support if not friends.

Denki gave a sly grin before wrapping his arms around Katsuki, ever the boundary stepper, “You love us.”

Katsuki shoved at the man’s face, and made a grossed out sound when Kaminari clung onto him harder, “I actually hope you die.”

The group shared a laugh at the display.

“What are you going to do now?” Mina asked. Her arm was casually wrapped around Camie’s own, and Eijirou had so many questions about that.

Katsuki shrugged his shoulders, “Go home.”

Eijirou couldn’t explain why that felt so wrong to hear. Katsuki was going home alone after an event for his own daughter. He would spend the night all by himself while everyone around him went out to celebrate.

“Dude, come out with us! We’re bar crawling,” Sero cheered.

“We can have you back by your early bedtime,” Todoroki added knowingly.

But Katsuki just shook his head, and pursed his lips.

“Nah, don’t waste your twenties on me, go have fun.”

And Eijirou fucking hated that.

He hated that he knew Katsuki didn’t want to be alone, but in some warped ways believed that he had to be alone. He wasn’t a waste of anyone’s twenties, especially when Katsuki himself was twenty three years old. So why did he feel like he was? Who told him he was a waste, a burden? Who made Katsuki feel so insignificant?

Eijirou wanted to believe that he was projecting. He was with Hana, and she was abusive as shit. But part of him knew it wasn’t projection. Because as much as Hana beat him down, and made him forget who he was inside, Eijirou never thought of himself as a burden to his friends, or the people who cared about him. That was deeply rooted, that came from something that was way worse than what Hana had put him through.

That was a pain Katsuki hadn’t mentioned yet. One that Eijirou would have to eventually carefully excavate from the man’s tightly guarded heart.

“Bye Ei,” the blonde nodded.

He wanted to kiss him, but he couldn’t. Eijirou didn’t know where the blonde stood with all of that, and he wanted to be respectful in front of Katsuki's parents and daughter.

So instead he leaned down and hugged the blonde. The man was stiff, but hugged back.

“I’ll call you okay,” Eijirou promised.

“You don’t have to call me, have a fun night,” Katsuki waved him off.

But somehow Eijirou knew his night wouldn’t be fun.

Not when the person he truly wanted to be with was sitting at home, by himself. Not when Katsuki truly believed he was a waste of someone’s Saturday night.

—

Eijirou lasted one bar in the bar crawl tonight. He ordered a club soda, and a pizza, and for the entire thirty minutes that he sat there all he did was think about how badly he wanted to be with katsuki.

Which was how he ended up ringing Katsuki's doorbell, with a pizza box in his other hand and rain pouring down on his perfectly gelled hair.

“Wanna hang out?” He asked when the blonde opened the door.

Katsuki gave him a confused look for a moment before his eyes d liked towards the box.

“Is that pizza?”

“If it is, will you say yes?”

The blonde moved aside, putting his hand out to welcome Eijirou inside.

“Did something happen with your friends?” The blonde asked as he followed Eijirou to the couch.

A movie was playing on the tv, leading Eijirou to believe that Katsuki had been watching movies all alone tonight.

“No, nothing happened,” he smiled as he sat down on the couch.

Katsuki crossed his arms at his chest, Standing at the entryway, “Then why’re you here?”

“Why not?” Eijirou shrugged, but when Katsuki gave him a look he sighed. “You seemed kinda sad to see Sooms go. I didn’t want you to be lonely.”

The blonde shook his head, “I’m not lonely. I’m a grown man.”

“Grown men get lonely too,” Eijirou supplied.

Katsuki scowled at the response.

“Fine, you're not lonely. Now quite pouting at the door, I walked through the rain for this,” Eijirou rolled his eyes and beckoned the man to join him at the couch.

They are in relative silence, only talking when Eijirou had a question about the movie or when Katsuki wanted to complain about the actors doing a shit job.

Eijirou ran his fingers through his hair, picking at the bits that still had gel in it.

“I hate this weather,” he sighed, mainly because he probably looked god awful next to the beautiful man next to him.

“I like it,” Katsuki shrugged, taking the last piece of pizza from the box.

“Why’s that? The rain is miserable,” Eijirou huffed.

The blonde shrugged his shoulders as he swallowed his bite, “It was raining when Katsumi was born.“

He set the pizza down and brushed the crumbs off his hands before he continued.

“The week before had been this horrible, humid, stuffy weather. It was miserable, especially for a pregnant person. But then, the day she was born it rained. It was like the world was saying fucking /finally/. Like the sky was taking its first breath after holding it in anticipation for nine months.”

There was seldom a time where Katsuki talked so openly about before Katsumi was born, so Eijirou didn’t say anything. He didn’t want to interrupt the blonde or say the wrong thing and have him close up again.

“And then, when I got to go home the air was cool, and the weather was calm. it wasn’t sticky, or uncomfortably, or wrong. It was like shit was finally making sense.”

“Were you always working here?” He asked.

“No,” Katsuki shook his head. “I was a waiter for the entire forty weeks. I saved every fucking penny so that I could move away from my home town. I bought the shop from an elderly couple who couldn’t take care of the plants anymore. They moved home to family and they gave me a good deal on the condo above because of my situation.”

“Must’ve been expensive. This place is super nice,” Eijirou complimented.

But Katsuki shrugged,“It’s a little big for the two of us.”

“Has it always just been the two of you?” Eijirou pried just a bit.

The one gray area with Katsuki was the mother of his child. It just didn’t make sense that someone would have a baby and then ditch it. It didn’t make sense that someone could love Katsuki and then leave him either.

“Yeah,” Katsuki nodded. “When she was two Deku and Camie hunted me down and crashed in the guest room for a month. Then they found apartments nearby and demanded to be a part of Sumi’s life.”

“I’m glad you had them.”

“Could’ve had them sooner if I wasn’t a fuckin idiot.”

Had something terrible happened? Did Katsuki do something to make her leave? Did she do something to make /him/ leave with their baby?

“Can I ask why you never talk about her biological mom?” Eijirou asked softly.

Katsuki stiffened, “She doesn’t have one.”

He could already see the other man’s walls rising up, so he spoke quickly, trying to explain why he was curious.

“But, you talk about a pregnant person, and how you were there the whole nine months, working your ass off for Katsumi. You talk about leaving the hospital with her too.”

When Katsuki didn’t say anything he let out a sigh. Did she hurt him? Was there something he was missing?

“She doesn’t have a mother,” Katsuki said again.

Eijirou nodded. It’s not that it’s any of his business. He doesn’t need to know in order to be a part of kastuki’s life. But it seemed bad. It was something bad enough that Katsuki refused her existence.

“When I was eighteen I dated this guy. A few months in, I— /We/— were stupid and didn’t use protection,” Katsuki explained with guarded shoulders and a tight jaw.

Eijirou furrowed his brow as he took that information in, slowly processing what he was saying and what that meant. There was a guy, and the two of them didn’t use protection. But they’re both dudes, so what did that really matter?

“And I got pregnant.”

At that his brain seemed to have gone radio static for a moment. He got pregnant. Katsuki got pregnant. With Katsumi.

“You’re trans?” He asked calmly.

The blonde stared at him for a long time. Long enough that Eijirou could see his eyes grow glassy and his bottom lip tremble. Long enough to see that Katsuki was shaking, and his fingers were digging into the skin on his palms so hard they might bleed.

Long enough for Eijirou to know the answer.

He was trans. More importantly he’s the one who carried Katsumi for nine months, and birthed her and Eijirou had totally fucking hurt him by assuming there was a women in this equation.

“Katsuki, why didn’t you say anything?” He ran his fingers through his hair.

Obviously he didn’t care if Katsuki was trans. He wasn’t a fucking dickhead who cared about shit like that. It was Katsuki's body, and he deserved to be comfortable in it.

But he really fucking cared that this whole time he’s been asking Katsuki about a woman, and wondering how on earth Katsumi was conceived when it was literally none of his business in the first place. God maybe he was a dickhead. Holy shit, yeah, he was a grade A fucking asshole.

“It’s not really something you just throw out in casual conversations,” Katsuki raised his shoulders.

He looked sick, and if Eijirou wasn’t panicking over the fact that he had probably been the worst friend to him for the past few months he might’ve asked if Katsuki needed a bowl to throw up in or something.

“Yeah, but I’ve been the worst person ever to you!” He threw his hands out.

Katsuki looked at him in confusion, “What?”

Eijirou ran his hands down his face. Fuck maybe he was going to be sick. Maybe he needed the bowl to throw up in.

How could he do this to Katsuki? He should’ve been more aware. He shouldn’t have ever asked in the first place.

“I kept bringing up a woman. I kept asking where Katsumi’s mother was, that’s so fucked. You should’ve corrected me right away, why didn’t you correct me right away?”

“I mean I told you she didn’t have a mom,” Katsuki offered uncomfortably.

“Fuck, you did. God,” he leaned forward and pressed his hands to his face. “Fuck. I’m sorry.”

Katsuki probably hated him. He can count at least three times that he’s asked Katsuki what happened to Katsumi's mother, thinking he was being a good friend by offering his support to the other man. The whole time he was just hurting Katsuki. Asking about a woman that didn’t exist. Taking away from the fact that it was actually Katsuki who was brave enough to have a baby. He was a terrible person.

“Are you freaked out?” Katsuki asked quietly.

“No— just,” Eijirou turned to look at the other man earnestly. “I’m so sorry. I feel like I’ve totally been invalidating you and your gender identity for the last few months.”

Katsuki’s eyes were wide, like he was shocked at the outcome of this conversation.

“No, it’s okay. I really didn’t want you to know,” Katsuki admitted.

“Why not?” Eijirou shook his head in genuine confusion.

That should be the biggest bragging right in the world. If Eijirou birthed a child as perfect as Katsumi he’d literally never shut up about it.

“/Because/,” Katsuki shook his head before looking off to the side nervously.

And then it all clicked. The story started lining up. He remembered Katsuki coming to him on a rainy night two weeks ago. He remembered him begging Eijirou to listen to what he had to say. He remembered that Hana had known information that she wanted to tell Eijirou, to hurt Katsuki.

He remembered telling Katsuki he’d be here to listen to him when he felt comfortable enough to talk about whatever difficult subject it was.

It was this. Katsuki was coming out to him.

His chest ached, his heart fucking burned.

Because this was the hard thing. This was the thing Katsuki was terrified to tell Eijirou.

“When people find out they usually look at me like I’m disgusting,” Katsuki admitted quietly.

So quiet that Eijirou wanted to scream.

Who had done this to him? Who had made Katsuki believe that this part of him was disgusting.

His hand immediately went to Katsuki's and he squeezed it tightly.

“You are not disgusting, you’re amazing,” he told the blonde firmly.

Katsuki let out a wet laugh, though he didn’t really sound amused. He sounded dejected, he sounded distant. He sounded like he didn’t believe Eijirou at all.

“Why do you keep saying that?” The blonde asked.

“What?” Eijirou shook his head.

“That I’m amazing or whatever the fuck.”

Because I love you, he wanted to say.

But he couldn’t. Not when Katsuki was already stressed, and scared to come out. Not when he’d finally mustered the courage to tell this to Eijirou. He wasn’t going to add any more stress to this situation for Katsuki, because he understood that even though he himself knew that being trans wouldn’t change anything, he knew Katsuki didn’t seem to think so.

He knew he had to prove himself to be a safe person that Katsuki could exist next to, the same way Katsuki had done for him all those months ago.

“Because you /are/,” Eijirou squeezed the blonde's hand tighter.

Katsuki swallowed thickly, staring at the way their hands were linked together. He knew there was no immediate fix to this. Eijirou knew that no matter what he said, even if he told Katsuki that being trans was okay, or that he accepted him in whatever gender he was comfortable with, it wouldn’t fix his fears overnight.

He knew that he just had to be there for Katsuki. He just had to sit here and listen, and answer his concerns. Eijirou just had to continue to be here, unwavering.

“Thanks, I guess,” the blonde shrugged his shoulders. “Does this change shit?”

“Why would it change anything,” Eijirou asked softly.

“It usually does,” Katsuki mumbled.

His hands no longer shook, and that sickly look on his face had dimmed to just a look of discomfort.

And all Eijirou could do was shriek internally and wonder what monster on earth had beat Katsuki down this bad. So bad that he was ashamed of the part of him that brought him Katsumi, ashamed of the parts of him that made him who he was.

“Not for me,” he pulled at the blonde's hand until it was at his lips and then pressed a soft kiss to the back of it. “I don’t look at you any different man.”

It was quiet for a long time after that. He assumed Katsuki was trying to fit all of his thoughts back together, or trying to calm himself down from the worked up state he was in. He hadn’t cried, which Eijirou wasn’t sure on whether or not that was a good thing or not. Sometimes crying really helped. Sometimes it got everything out of your system and helped you think a little clearer.

He wondered how many times Katsuki broke down. He wondered if the blonde even allowed himself to break. Katsuki was so good with Katsumi. The man sacrificed everything for her, even his own well being. Sometimes Eijirou wondered if he neglected his own aches just so Katsumi could have a good life.

“So he isn’t involved at all?” Eijirou found himself asking after a while.

He sort of already knew the answer. Katsuki had always said it’s just him and Katsumi.

“Hasn’t been since the day he found out,” Katsuki shook his head. Eyes downcast as he spoke. “I don’t think he saw me as a long term thing to begin with. I was just a way to get his dick wet.”

Eijirou bit the inside of his lip as he recalled a conversation they had a long time ago. When he’d asked Katsuki why he didn’t date, Katsuki had told him that all men cared about was getting their dicks wet.

And Eijirou had told him that only bad men thought that.

“That’s not what you are, Kats,” he promised.

“Yeah,” the blonde smiled, blinking a few times like he was willing away tears. Eijirou squeezed his hand tighter.

If the blonde did cry, he truly wouldn’t blame him, though Eijirou can lie he’d hate to see Katsuki cry. It actually might kill him to see his favorite person reduced to tears over something so horrible.

“He really hated me. Probably only fucked me out of boredom.”

Eijirou shook his head in disappointment. Not at Katsuki, he could never be disappointed in Katsuki.

But he really hated the universe for letting this happen. For preforming so many miracles everyday, and somehow letting Katsuki slip through the cracks and get dragged through the fucking mud. He was disappointed in the man that had made him feel like something to only be fucked and then thrown away. He was disappointed in his parents all over again because now he knew they abandoned Katsuki when he was /pregnant/, which is even more stressful and terrifying for an eighteen year old. He was disappointed in himself for not watching his own mouth, for not thinking just a little bit harder about what he said and what that could imply.

“He wanted to date a man, a real man, and I wasn’t enough of one to make him feel validated in his sexuality I guess. We were always a secret. It wasn’t one of those things where we went on dates or whatever.”

Katsuki brushed it off so easily, even though each word felt like a knife through Eijirou’s chest. How could this man do this? How could anyone do this to someone else?

“Please tell me you dumped this asshole,” Eijirou gritted his teeth.

Katsuki laughed sadly, “No, I didn’t. I should’ve but I didn’t. I actually begged him to stay with me, and he did for a while.”

The blonde stared down at their interlocked hands, stretching his fingers out just to see if Eijirou wanted to let go. When the redhead didn’t move his hand away, Katsuki continued, “And then a few months later, when Katsumi came around I begged for him to stay again.”

Eijirou stated the obvious, “But he didn’t.”

Katsuki shook his head, meeting Eijirou’s gaze.

“He told me that if I was a real man this would’ve never happened. Said if I was a real man he could’ve really loved me,” at that Katsuki seemed to close up for a moment. Like maybe that was the most tender spot of all. The fact that he was unlovable because of something he couldn’t change.

The blonde let out a big sigh, “It was a really bad fight. Pretty much deterred me from dating for the rest of my life.”

Eijirou pursed his lips. Now he understood better than anyone else. Now he knew exactly why all of this was so hard. Now the fear in Katsuki’s eyes held so much more meaning.

“I wouldn’t want Katsumi around someone like that anyways. I’m sort of glad it’s just me,” Katsuki added.

It was like he was trying to comfort Eijirou. Even after everything he just told him, Katsuki wanted to make sure /Eijirou/ wasn’t upset. Why did he do that? Why did he always worry more about the people around him than himself?

Eijirou tugged on the blonde's hand, hinting at him to come close. Katsuki leaned forward until both of their foreheads knocked together.

“He should’ve never said that shit to you. He should’ve been respectful enough to use protection and prevent the shit /he/ didn’t want.”

Their eyes were centimeters apart, deep ruby staring straight into those tired dazzling scarlets. Eijirou had to make sure he knew that though. He had to make sure Katsuki knew he wasn’t at fault here.

The blonde closed his eyes and hummed, and somehow after all of this he found a reason to smile softly. How could he be smiling after what he’d just said. After basically explaining how a man took his heart and tore it to shreds at eighteen years old.

“Maybe,” Katsuki admitted. “But I’m really glad he didn’t. It was really shitty but having Katsumi has been my greatest accomplishment in life.”

And that made sense.

Katsumi was the bright spot in all of this darkness. She was the one good thing that came out of all of that pain. That was why Katsuki was protective of her. That was why every day he was attentive and loving, but still gave her space to exist and be her own person.

“I think you might be the most amazing person I know,” Eijirou whispered softly.

Katsuki huffed before meeting the other man’s gaze again, “So I’ve heard.”

The both moved apart just enough to slide into a hug. He’s not really sure who initiated it, but it was necessary on both ends.

When they pulled away Eijirou asked, “Would it make you dysphoric to talk about it?”

“What? My pregnancy?” Katsuki gave him an awkward look. “What is there to ask?”

And there was so much he wanted— no, /needed/ to know. Like who took care of him, who made sure he got to his appointments? Who took care of him when he got morning sickness, who held him at night and told him everything would be okay when it didn’t feel like it could be?

Who held his hand in that delivery room when got to welcome his daughter into the world?

There were so many questions Eijirou had.

But he could tell that Katsuki wasn’t ready for that yet. He could keep talking about it. Not after he’d just laid everything out for Eijirou to greedily consume. That’s not what Katsuki needed at this exact moment. He didn’t need Eijirou to mow every painful detail.

He needed to be comforted.

And so Eijirou did the one thing he was always good at with Katsuki, and acted like a total dumbass.

“Is it true you get weird food cravings? And did you buy one of those weird pregnancy pillows that look like a human shaped out of cushion? And also did that shit hurt, like, so fucking bad or were you able to handle it like you do with everything else and make it look easy?”

The blonde gave him an incredulous look before he started laughing hard.

“Why’re you laughing! These questions are important!” Eijirou smiled.

But the laugh was exactly what he’d wanted to pull from Katsuki. Exactly what he knew Katsuki really needed right now.

“You’re such a fucking weirdo,” Katsuki choked out between his laughter.

Eijirou shoved him, causing Katsuki to shove back and once again they were back in that familiar tango they tended to dance.

“You're changing the subject! Oh my god I’m right! You totally had a human shaped pillow!” He gasped.

Katsuki cackled, “You’re a freak—“

His voice cut off when Eijirou used his own body weight to his advantage and squished the smaller man into the couch. Katsuki’s laugh turned high pitched as his body was squished.

“Did you have to stop sleeping on your stomach? I fucking love sleeping on my stomach. It’s like the comfiest way to sleep, especially if you kick one leg out of the blanket—“

“Shut up Eijirou!” Katsuki practically cried out in laughter.

And Eijirou couldn’t help but laugh along with him, because seeing the blonde like this— happy, laughing, smiling so hard his eyes were wrinkling in the corner— made Eijirou the happiest man alive.

He was beautiful. A sight for sore Eijirou with that perfect smile. His stomach jumped with each laugh despite the fact that he was squished under Eijirou. It was proof. Proof that Katsuki lived. He was alive, he lived through all of this hardship and came out laughing.

Eijirou couldn’t stop himself from pressing his lips against the blondes softly. At first the man gasped, but soon he melted into the tender kiss.

When he pulled away, Katsuki was staring at him with a blank expression.

“You kissed me.”

Eijirou ran a hand down the side of Katsuki's cheek before murmuring, “You look so beautiful when you’re happy. I couldn’t help it.”

Katsuki bit back a grin, stifling a blush before saying, “Kimchi.”

“What?” Eijirou raised a brow.

“I always craved kimchi. Kimchi rice, kimchi ramen, kimchi stew, kimchi dumplings. I’d eat it straight out of the jar.”

“Spicy,” Eijirou propped himself up with an elbow, still laying on top of Katsuki's tiny body.

“I loved spicy food. I didn’t have a weird ass human shaped cushion, and yeah I had to stop sleeping on my stomach,” the man explained.

Eijirou hadn’t really expected any answers to his questions. If anything he’d only asked them to get Katsuki laughing. They were real questions, but he would have googled them.

“And no, I didn’t make it look easy. I was really scared.”

Eijirou hummed at the admission of the last one. That hurt to know. That made him wish he could go back in time and meet Katsuki earlier on.

“I wish I could’ve been there to make it less scary,” he admitted.

And maybe that was strange. Maybe he shouldn’t have said that when they hadn’t put a name to what they were to each other. Maybe he was overstepping or pushing a boundary.

But then Katsuki smiled sadly and said, “Me too.”

He fell back into a kiss before he could think better of it. This one was much less soft. He moved faster, hungry for more of Katsuki. The blonde followed suit, pressing his tongue into Eijirou’s mouth and wrapping his arms around his shoulders. A hand was in his hair and a leg was wrapped around his side.

Eijirou’s own hand trailed down the blonde stomach, just barely reaching the man’s waist band when a hand stopped him.

“Eijirou, I can’t,” Katsuki said, breathlessly. “I’m sorry.”

“No, /no/, I’m sorry,” he sat up, moving off of the blonde quickly. “I don’t want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. I should’ve asked.”

They both sat up, not knowing what to say to the other. Eijirou felt like a total dick. Why did he think that was a good idea? After everything Katsuki had just shared, the other man probably wasn’t ready for something like that yet.

Katsuki’s fingers twisted as he nervously fidgeted in his spot next to Eijirou.

“I haven’t had sex with anyone since before Katsumi was born,” he admitted quietly.

“It’s okay,” Eijirou promised. “We don’t have to do anything that you don’t like. I’m totally fine with just watching a movie and hanging out.”

He grabbed the remote off the coffee table and handed it over to Katsuki with a smile. He wasn’t trying to use Katsuki. He wasn’t trying to do anything Katsuki didn’t want to do.

An awkward silence filled the living room as the two of them stared at the screen. Neither of them were really watching. Eijirou was cursing himself for overstepping, and Katsuki was deep in thought on his side of the couch. He couldn’t tell what the other man was thinking about.

“Eijirou,” the blonde was staring down at his lap, biting the inside of his cheek.

He waited patiently for the blonde to speak again.

“I like kissing you.”

And who was he to deny Katsuki of that?

His lips were back on Katsuki’s in seconds, swallowing up the tiny moan that fell from the blonde's lips.

He’d kiss Katsuki every second of every minute of every hour of every day if he could. He’d run his tongue through his mouth just to lure that beautiful moan out from hiding. He’d do just about anything to feel the man’s breath against his face, or smell the sweet scent of his cologne in such close proximity.

And again as he kissed the beautiful man below him Eijirou can only think how?

How could someone look at Katsuki and leave? How could someone decide he was anything other than the most wonderful person to ever exist?

How could someone hurt Katsuki?

It wasn’t just one person, it was everyone. It was his friends, his boyfriend, his family. Everyone broke him down until Katsuki had no choice but to leave. To run away and start this new life for himself.

Eijirou’s hands gripped the smaller man’s waist, and against his better judgment he ground his hips downwards. The blonde let out a shaky breath against his lips, as his erection pressed between the damp fabric between Katsuki's legs.

The smaller man’s face was flushed and with each roll of Eijirou’s hip, the other man’s bucked upwards. Yet he was still so timid in this. Still so scared to ask for what he wanted. He could see it in the way the blonde tried to squeeze his legs around Eijirou's waist, pulling him deeper between his legs with every slide of their hips.

“What do you want?” Eijirou murmured against Katsuki's lips.

The blonde panted when Eijirou trailed kisses down his neck, sucking the skin there until it was purple.

“I wanna do more,” Katsuki admitted.

His face was a gorgeous shade of red, lips pursed, legs spread to accommodate Eijirou. He was perfect. He was beautiful, but still so secretly scared. Eijirou wished he could somehow seep out the rest of the fear in his face. The fear he held so close to his heart at all times.

And now Eijirou knows why. Now he was one of the few people in Katsuki’s life that was trusted with everything. With his pain, his fears, his past, his inexperience and experience all at once.

“Okay,” he said softly against the bruised skin at the junction of Katsuki’s neck and shoulder. He kissed it softly. “I’ll take care of you.”

At first one of his hands tried to snake its way under Katsuki’s shirt, but the blonde immediately stopped him. He assumed there was a reason for that but didn’t press on it right now. Instead he trailed that safe hand down the hem of the blonde’s sweatpants and boxers, until his fingers just barely dipped into the hot, wet heat he’d been searching for.

He stroked the other man’s clit gently, dipping his fingers into his already slick hole and pulling them out just enough to slide over the bud and stroke it between his two fingers. The bigger man leaned back to Katsuki's spit soaked lips, kissing him hungrily, eagerly and maybe too passionately for whatever this was supposed to be between the two of them.

Katsuki whined against Eijirou’s lips, seemingly unsure of what to do with the pleasure as it rolled through him.

Eijirou wondered if anyone had ever treated him like this. He wondered if anyone ever even tried to make Katsuki feel good before.

Surely not. Surely if anyone had ever taken their fingers and just slightly pressed them inside Katsuki’s soaking hole, only to trail them out and massage at his clit once again, they wouldn’t have been able to stop. Surely when they pulled back from kissing those soft pink lips, they’d catch that gorgeous moan of overstimulation despite the fact that they’d just barely begun—That Katsuki was only at the very beginning of his pleasure— and they’d crave that feeling again and again.

Eijirou can’t imagine anyone feeling any other type of way. Because all he wanted to do was make Katsuki cum right now. All he could do was watch the man’s slim brows curl up in pleasure when he pressed his two fingers back inside and created a steady rhythm.

He should lean back in to kiss Katsuki. Their chests were pressed against each other, pinning Katsuki to the leather couch below him with the weight of his body as he watched each stroke of the blonde’s clit make his face contort into pleasure.

Katsuki was watching as Eijirou fingered him, and only grimaced once at the wet sounds that came from his dripping cunt before replacing it with a breathy moan. Eijirou groaned at just how wet he was. He couldn’t stop himself from yanking at the sweats still around Katsuki's waist, limiting his arms movement. The blonde lifted his waist, allowing Eijirou to pull off both his pants and underwear, and drop them somewhere on the floor.

He could practically feel the heat radiating off of the other man’s dripping pussy, and couldn’t stop himself from watching his finger disappear in the prettiest hole he’d ever seen. Eijirou was achingly hard, dick straining in his own pants as he fingered the other man.

“Eijirou,” Katsuki squeezed his eyes shut in embarrassment, clenching his teeth and turning to the side.

“What? What’s wrong?” He slowed his movement in fear of taking things too far.

But Katsuki whined at the sudden stop and squeezed his legs together despite the fact that Eijirou’s hand was still there.

“Why’re you staring?” He mumbled through teary eyes.

Eijirou reeled back at the question.

Did he think he was judging? Did his last partner stare at him in a bad way?

“Because you’re the prettiest man I’ve ever fucking seen,” he said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Because it was, it should be. Katsuki should honestly be the cockiest motherfucker on earth with a body like this. He wanted to memorize every minuscule detail of Katsuki's face when he was like this. When his guard was finally let down and he gave in to letting himself have something, even if it was only sexual pleasure.

“Hey,” Eijirou said when the blonde didn’t look at him. Katsuki opened his eyes to glare, though it looked more like a pout.

“You’ve got to know that you’re the most gorgeous person I’ve ever seen.”

And he meant it. He truly, truly meant it.

But he could tell that Katsuki still didn’t believe him. He could tell that the man was nothing more than ashamed of himself. As if he was giving himself to Eijirou apologetically.

He had half a mind to wonder where the blonde’s ex boyfriend lived so he could tear his door down and knock his teeth out of his face for making Katsuki feel like his body was something he had to hate.

Eijirou sat up with a new found objective. If Katsuki couldn’t see just how gorgeous he was he’d just have to prove it to him. Slowly, of course, and only by katsuki’s means.

He gathered between the blonde's legs, all but falling off the couch until Katsuki's legs were thrown over either of his shoulders. Then he pressed a kiss into the fat of the man’s thigh, and sucked hard at the skin there. Katsuki’s breath hitched, and as if on instinct his hand came to pull down his shirt.

Eijirou eyed the blonde, watching his face grow impossibly redder as Eijirou got closer to the spot between his legs.

“Can I please eat you out,” he breathed out as he pressed a finger back inside the man’s tight hole.

Katsuki sat up on one of his elbows. His face was apprehensive, nervous, overwhelmed, and still so fearful. Eijirou stroked his blonde’s inner thigh gently, pressing a kiss against his throbbing clit. He could feel Katsuki's legs tense at the feeling.

“What if you don’t like it,” the blonde mumbled, looking off to the side.

“I don’t think that’s possible,” Eijirou shook his head, squeezing the lovely fat of the man’s thigh once again.

He wouldn’t do anything Katsuki wasn’t ready for. The fact that he was even allowed to do this with him when he’d explicitly stated that he hadn’t done anything sexual in five years was enough for him.

But he wanted Katsuki to feel good, and he wanted to be the reason he felt good too. He wanted Katsuki to know just how perfect his body was, just how /loved/ his body was.

“Let me show you how good you deserve to be treated,” he whispered against the other’s soaked sex. “I’ll show you how you’re supposed to be worshiped.”

Katsuki bit his lip before nodding his head silently.

And that was all Eijirou needed before diving back into those slick, wet folds. His tongue pressed deep into the blonde, earning a surprised yelp. Katsuki’s fingers immediately went to his hair, pulling his bangs from his face before fisting the rest. It hardly helped to keep strands of hair from falling and getting wet from slick and drool.

He dragged his tongue up through the folds, before wrapping his lips around the man’s member and sucking it. His fingers went back to pressing inside the blonde, crooking his fingers just slightly and moving them a bit harder. The change had Katsuki crying out in pleasure, arching his back as the bigger man sucked at his clit. His tongue ran circles around the sensitive bud, and he groaned at the way the man’s legs started to tremble.

“Eijirou, please,” Katsuki whined, though he wasn’t begging for anything in particular.

He looked gorgeous like this, skin damp with sweat, shirt wrinkled and rising to show the soft skin beneath. Eijirou raked his eyes down the soft line of abs. They weren’t as toned as his own, but they were lean and showed years of dedication to staying fit.

Eijirou set a steady rhythm with his fingers, while his tongue lapped at Katsuki's clit at just the right spot to make his toes curl and his eyes squeeze shut in growing pleasure.

His free hand took the opportunity to run down the soft expanses of skin on the other man’s stomach, only stopping when he felt a barely noticeable scar near Katsuki’s waist line. That had the blonde snapping his eyes open quickly, and his breath hitched as they made eye contact.

This was what Katsuki had been hiding below his shirt. Or perhaps it was just one of the many parts of himself that someone else made him feel shame for. It was a tiny scar, which Eijirou could only assume was from when his daughter was born. A c-section scar, healed over after five years, but those scars never truly go away.

Why would Katsuki be embarrassed of something that was so obviously supposed to be worn as a badge of honor. It was proof that he was the creator of such a wonderful child. Eijirou placed small kisses up to the scar, eyes not once leaving Katsuki’s. It was a silent thank you, a quiet acknowledgement. One that told Katsuki he sees it, but it doesn’t change anything. If anything it only made Eijirou fall in love with the blonde more. Way more than he probably should, more than he was allowed if all of this was seemingly casual to Katsuki. It sure didn’t feel that way anymore.

He kissed down the line of the scar softly, gratefully, and watched as Katsuki's lips turned up into a small, barely there smile. It’s the first time the underlying emotion of fear had left his face for happiness to take its place, if only for a moment before pleasure took over once again and he was letting out a low groan as Eijirou went back to abusing his clit.

His chin was covered in drool and slick, dribbling down to soak the couch, and the smaller man’s thighs, and his fingers which slipped against his thighs every time Katsuki tried to close them.

Eijirou spread his legs wider, and Katsuki all but shrieked at the new position. He was close, so close, Eijirou could feel it as his thighs trembled and closed on his face. Not that he was complaining. He’d die here if Katsuki let him.

His tongue ran up his folds, swirling around the man’s clit, not letting up even when Katsuki’s fist was pulling at his hair, trying to pull him off of his throbbing pussy.

The blonde’s moans turned into whines, pants, loose cries. His hips bucked into Eijirou’s mouth, only to try and pull away once again, until a torturous pattern was created where the blonde couldn’t escape the overstimulation. Not that Eijirou would let him escape with the way his arms were clamped around his hips as he refused to give the blonde a break.

He was close, seconds away from orgasming, and the redhead was determined to be the one to take him there. The blonde was falling apart, arching his back, crying his name, squeezing his shaking legs tightly around the redheads face until he was coming, and suddenly everything was wet and /fuck/ Katsuki was squirting. Eijirou groaned against the man’s leaking pussy, wetting his hair, his face, his shirt, the leather of the couch.

He didn’t let up on the man’s clit, despite the sobs coming from the other. Katsuki’s hand tried so hard to push him away, to stop the assault of his clit through his orgasm, but Eijirou refused to move from the other man’s cunt. He could drown in it, he could do this for the rest of his life.

Katsuki fell back with a gasp, limbs twitching, body trembling, “I-I’m sorry—“

“You’re so fucking hot,” Eijirou groaned before crawling up and locking their lips together.

Like hell would he let Katsuki apologize for the sexiest orgasm Eijirou had ever seen.

He suddenly became aware of just how hard he was himself, his aching dick begged to be touched, but in his devotion to getting Katsuki off he completely neglected it. There was a soaked spot on his jeans from where he'd already started leaking precum.

Katsuki must’ve become aware of it around the same time, because despite the fact that he could hardly muster anything more than sloppy kisses, his hand snaked down the waistband of Eijirou’s jeans and started to stroke his length.

At this point the redhead was so sensitive that it took an embarrassingly small amount of time to get him panting into Katsuki’s open mouth. Katsuki’s hands were soft despite years of working in the garden, and his grasp was wet from his own pussy making every movement slippery.

Eijirou came in his pants with a choked gasp against Katsuki's lips. The blonde swallowed it up, mouth catching each strangled gasp, legs wrapped around Eijirou tightly as their chests pressed up against each other.

Cum dropped from his hand when he pulled it from the bigger man’s pants, and there were audible drops from the couch to the hardwood floor as various fluids dropped off of their bodies and the soaked leather couch. Eijirou’s cum slipped from the blonde's fingers, and collected against the pale, damp skin of his stomach. If Eijirou wasn’t so fucking exhausted his lick it off of him until he was clean.

But all he could manage right now was dropping down onto the blonde's chest and earning a grunt in response. For a moment they sat in total silence, panting for air, coming down from their respective highs. Katsuki’s arms were lazily thrown over Eijirou’s shoulders, while Eijirou’s body blanketed him.

Under the quiet cover of darkness, there was nothing stopping Eijirou from relishing in the fact that he was in Katsuki’s arms. There was nothing to stop him from the immense feeling of adoration he had for the other man. He loved him. He really, truly loved him more than he’d ever loved anyone.

This went beyond any other relationship he’d ever had, and they aren’t even dating. They don’t even share these feelings. Nothing here is reciprocal save for the fact that they both want each other to feel good.

But Eijirou swore he could feel something more, and maybe that was the hopeless romantic in him, always wanting love, always craving it. But he swore he could feel Katsuki’s heart, could feel the way the other man cared for Eijirou in the way that he stroked his hair and held him near his heart. He’d never felt like that before. Like he didn’t have to question someone’s love for him. But he swore he could feel it with Katsuki.

He opened his mouth to say it, to finally just admit it and have it out in the open, but was cut off by the blonde.

“We need to clean up,” he said with a hazy grin.

Eijirou hummed in response, but didn’t move from his spot on the other man’s chest. Katsuki nudged him again and he groaned.

“Come on lazy ass.”

He begrudgingly got to his feet and followed Katsuki to the bathroom. The blonde turned on the shower and grabbed a spare towel from the linens closet. He was still naked from the waist down, but his shirt was baggy and hid the very pretty parts of him that Eijirou had just gotten well acquainted with.

When he flicked his eyes up to the mirror, Katsuki was staring back at him. God he was wrecked. Hair haphazardly pointing every which way, hickies bruised down a line on his neck, lips swollen and skin a blotchy red. He was gorgeous. The blonde mumbled something about getting an extra change of clothes for him, before leaving the bathroom with a blush on his face.

Eijirou got in the shower quickly, and scrubbed the feeling of sex off of his skin. Katsuki’s body wash was sweet like caramel, and his hair wash was a light sandalwood. When he peered down, he couldn’t help but huff out a fond laugh at the bubble bath pressed into the corner of the tub. There was strawberry, tear free shampoo, and a cup holding waterproof shower crayons. As he looked closer, he found little writings on the wall. Conversations between Katsuki and ‘Sumi. Little ‘I love you’s etched into the tile with green and purple crayons. If he could, he’d write something too. If Katsuki would let him, he’d tell both him and his daughter just how much he loved the both of them.

But he knew that wasn’t what Katsuki wanted. The blonde didn’t want to date. He didn’t want anything serious. So he didn’t pick up the crayon. He didn’t touch Katsumi's things. He just washed his body and got out. Katsuki had placed a pair of sweats and a baggy shirt on the counter, which Eijirou surprisingly fit into. Perhaps these were used when Katsuki was a little bit bigger. Before Katsumi, or rather during Katsumi.

When he left the shower, the blonde was nowhere to be seen, probably taking a shower of his own, so Eijirou cleaned up the couch and the floor. Katsuki arrived later, with wet hair and warm skin, and helped Eijirou clean up as well.

“Now what?” The blonde asked once the living room was back to normal.

Eijirou stood awkwardly, because he was thinking the same thing. Should he stay, or should he go? They weren’t dating, he hadn’t even been invited into Katsuki's room before. They couldn’t cuddle, or anything.

“What do you want to do?” He found himself asking.

If Katsuki wanted to sleep he’d leave. If he didn’t want Eijirou here he’d respect that and go home.

“Want to watch a movie?” The blonde asked, motioning towards the tv.

He was stalling, and maybe Eijirou was delusional, or maybe that meant that Katsuki didn’t want him to leave.

So he silently nodded his head, and when Katsuki sat on the couch, he curled into his side. He let Katsuki throw a blanket over both of them, and smiled when the blonde leaned his head on Eijirou’s shoulder. They cuddled up on the couch, watching some action filled movie as their own bones grew weak and full of exhaustion.

And when they both started to drift off to sleep, neither of them made any effort to move, or wake the other up.

Chapter Text

Eijirou would like to say that Hana was no longer a part of his life. In fact there was nothing that he wished for more in the world than for her to leave him alone.

But sadly that wasn’t true.

It has been months since he very clearly told her that they were done and he wouldn’t be returning to her. He’d blocked her number, requested the locks to be changed on his apartment, blocked her on social media, and she still bothered him.

This time she’d called Mina over and over again, pestering her to give the phone to Eijirou despite the fact that Mina was not with Eijirou. Mina had called this morning to tell him that it scared her, effectively making Eijirou feel like human garbage for letting Hana’s toxicity bleed into his friend's life.

And Hana calling Mina nonstop would be bad enough.

But that wasn’t what made everything so fucking unbearable. It was only a small sliver of Hana’s insanity. Because this week she called Mina nonstop, but last week she called Sero and Todoroki, and a few weeks before she’d threatened to tell Katsuki’s secret to Eijirou, and then she’d called his mothers asking for him, and the gym was starting to her calls from her too.

She was starting to freak everyone out around Eijirou, and honestly it made him feel like a terrible person. He was the one who let her into their lives. He was the reason all of his friends were scared to answer unknown callers.

That being said, he woke up late today after barely getting any sleep, and had no time to stop by the flower shop and say hello to his favorite people in the world, which only soured his mood that much more.

When he was at work, he could block out all of his thoughts. He led two lifting classes, a trainer class, and had two private consults before nine in the morning, which kept him sane.

But now he had a break before his next class, and all he could do was sit around and think about how he could receive a call from Hana at any given moment on the gym’s phone.

He was so lost in his thoughts, that he didn’t even notice the tiny little body in front of him until they were jumping up and down and waving their hands in his face.

“Eiji,” Sumi cheered happily at him.

The little girl was wearing a green pair of overalls with a yellow shirt underneath, and a pair of dirty orange converse. Her hair was down today, which Katsuki hardly ever did. When it was down like this, she looked a lot like Katsuki. It was longer, maybe reaching her shoulders, but it poofed up a lot like her dads did.

“Sumi? What are you doing here,” he smiled.

She was always the light in his shitty situations. Somehow, seeing Katsuki’s daughter always made him happy. It also made him a bit jealous that Katsuki got to hang out with her all the time.

“I came to see you,” she smiled, sticking her hands in the pockets of her overalls.

“Where’s dad,” he asked with a worried face.

He wasn’t sure when it became normal for him to refer to Katsuki as simply dad, and not katsumi’s dad, or her father. But it came easy, like it was just another name used for Katsuki. When he was younger he always thought it would be so strange to be called dad. Somehow now it didn’t bother him to call Katsuki dad when speaking to Katsumi.

Sometimes, when his mind wandered, he wondered if Katsumi would ever get to call him her father too.

But that was his wishful thinking. Eijirou always did this, always planned a life out that had hardly even begun. He jumped off the deep end rather quickly with love. It was more fun to swim in but it also made it easier to drown.

“He’s not over here,” Sumi shrugged her shoulders like it wasn’t a big deal.

But it was a big deal. She couldn’t come here alone and as much as he loved the fact that she came to visit him, the adult in him knew he had to teach her why it wasn’t okay.

“Wha— Katsumi you can’t just leave the shop alone and come here! Something bad could happen to you. You’re way too young to be wandering off on your own like that!”

He sounded like a parent, like an actual adult. When did he become someone responsible? Someone who’s first thought was to teach Katsumi the right way to do things instead of having fun and welcoming her visit. He supposed this is what Katsuki had meant when he said he had to be the parent and make tough choices sometimes.

The little girl pushed her lip out in a pout, seemingly frustrated at Eijirou’s scolding. Then she pointed off towards the front desk.

“Daddy’s right over there,” she grumbled.

And sure enough, Katsuki was standing there watching him with a smirk on his face, obviously observing the entire scene that just played out. Sero was standing behind the counter, snickering along with him. He’d kill the brunette for not warning him. So much for being a wingman.

He scooped the pouting child up and held her on his hip as he joined the two of them.

“Lecturing my kid?” Katsuki raised a brow as he leaned against the counter.

“I thought she left the shop alone, my heart dropped out of my ass,” Eijirou could feel his face burning.

Was it weird of him? The way he felt the need to parent Katsumi? The way he wanted to protect her more than anything in the world? No longer was she just a little buddy of his, but an extension of the person he loved so much. Katsuki didn’t seem to mind. He just smiled and laughed it off.

“Anyways, are you working out?” He cleared his head. Those aren’t the thoughts he should be thinking right now.

“Nah,” the blonde scrunched his nose, staring off into the endless machines in the gym. He turned back to face Eijirou as he admitted, “You looked sad when you passed the shop this morning. Thought I’d check in.”

He didn’t know what to make of the fact that Katsuki looked for him in the mornings. He also didn’t know what to make of the fact that Katsuki was able to know how he felt just by the look on his face.

The blonde dug around in the wallet, grabbing a piece of paper from inside and showing it off,

“And show you this.”

Eijirou let out a gasp at the picture in the other man’s hands. He set the squirming little girl down, and soon she was running off to follower Sero back towards the yoga mats.

Things have been different since the night they shared together last week. There hadn’t been any more of it. No kissing, or hugging, or giving each other head. But still, things were different. Lighter. It was like a load was taken off Katsuki's shoulders that night after he’d came out to him.
He was obviously a lot more comfortable and open with Eijirou.

Comfortable enough to do things like this, and show Eijirou a picture he probably wouldn’t have months ago. Pinched between his fingers was a small photo of both Katsuki and Katsumi. The little girl couldn’t have been a year old yet, what with the chubby cheeks and only the first couple of bottom teeth growing in.

Katsuki looked young too. Probably barely even nineteen. He looked tired, with dark circles under his young eyes, and messy hair. But beyond that he looked happy.

“Oh my god I need it,” Eijirou reached over the counter to grab the photo but Katsuki pulled it away. “Please!”

The blonde laughed, “Take a picture of it. It’s mine.”

Eijirou pulled his phone out as he spoke, one million percent taking a picture because part of him was somehow jealous he missed out on this part of Katsuki's life. The part where he was getting used to having a teeny Katsumi running around his house. The sleepless nights, the new experiences, the healing, and growing up despite still being a kid.

“You look so different! So young! You have chubby cheeks!”

“Baby fat, probably both mine and hers. I’m like nineteen here? I think?” Katsuki smiled fondly at the memory before tucking the picture back into his wallet, hidden away from the rest of the world.

Eijirou couldn’t help but feel special for being one of the few people who got to see these small monuments in his favorite peoples’ lives. He wanted more of it. He wanted all of it.

And the closer he got to the idea of truly being with Katsuki, and being something more to Katsumi, the more he craved it. He wanted Katsuki so bad. His heart, his body, his brain, his soul. Sumi was just an added bonus. A person created from the person he was in love with; therefore he loved the girl just as much.

He really wanted this.

“What are your plans tonight?” He asked suddenly.

Katsuki leaned on the counter, eyes locked on his daughter who was learning a yoga pose with Sero and a few other regular customers.

“Well it’s Saturday so Aunt Camie has Sooms until nine.”

“Let’s go out,” Eijirou asked.

It made his hands sweaty, and his heart face a bit, because this was new. They hadn’t put a name on anything they’d been doing. It was a casual affair of /amazing/ make outs and indescribable bouts of pleasure. But it wasn’t only that. It was long, deep conversations that gave their friendship stronger meaning.

And asking Katsuki out on a date could make or break the foundation of their friendship.

The man raised his brows in interest, flicking his eyes away from his daughter and back to Eijirou, “Where?”

“Wherever you want,” the redhead smiled nervously.

Katsuki bit his bottom lip, “Are you asking me on a date?”

He didn’t sound angry, though Eijirou knew he was pushing it. He knew Katsuki didn’t date, and knew that Katsuki wanted to focus on parenting his child more than his own love life.

But fuck, the fact that he was so invested in the other man made not being with him so hard.

“That depends on if you think it’s totally crazy or not,” Eijirou leaned against the counter so he was eye level with the other man.

The blonde pursed his lips, but it was obvious he was trying to bite back a flustered grin as he fidgeted with the sleeve of his flannel and stared at his shoes.

“It’s not. But I was working a night shift.”

It’s not. He’s not crazy.

Katsuki liked him.

At least enough to think it wouldn’t be crazy to go out on a date. Eijirou felt like pins and needles were pushing through the skin of his hands, and his chest was a bundle of nerves. He almost couldn’t believe it, almost wanted to ask if he’d heard that right.

Katsuki wanted to go on a date with him.

“Close early?” Eijirou asked before his brain could catch up with him.

What an insane thing to ask for.

“For a date with you?” Katsuki raised a brow.

“It’ll be the best date you’ve ever been on,” he promised.

Katsuki laughed, “It’ll be the only date I’ve ever been on, dumbass.”

He felt his heart pinch as he was reminded of the other man’s past, but only for a small moment. Because nothing could ruin this moment for him. Katsuki liked him back. Katsuki wanted something more with him, and yeah this was only one date, but it was /something/.

“Oh my god now we have to go,” he smiled softly. “We can bring Sooms if Camie drops her off earlier than expected.”

If Katsuki would let him, he'd make it the best first date he’d ever been on. He’d do just about anything if the blonde would let him.

Eijirou had never felt this way about a person before. No longer was he in love out of pressure from kids in high school, or in love out of fear of being hurt by Hana.

He was just /in love/. He was in love with every breath he took, every step he walked, every blink, every movement. Eijirou loved him like it was inherent, like he was meant to.

And Katsuki was giving him a chance.

Sumi started to run back from her exercise with the yoga group, yelling about a tree pose she’d just learned, and effectively cutting off their conversation.

But not before Katsuki slid a hand across the counter and squeezed Eijirou’s fist that he hadn’t known he’d been clenching in the first place.

“Fine, text me.”

—

The fact that he was going on a date with Katsuki tonight meant he had to do everything in his power to put an end to Hana’s manipulative bullshit. Not only because he didn’t want anything to come close to messing up his chances with Katsuki, but also because Hana had been freaking out his friends, and honestly scaring Eijirou more than he’d like to admit.

Denying calls and blocking her number hadn’t been enough to get her to leave him alone, and today he’d finally stand up to her and do what he should’ve done a long time ago.

He’d agreed to meet with her, though Hana assumed they were going to ‘talk’ which was usually code for getting back together. Eijirou wasn’t going to fall into that trap again. Not this time. Not when he had so much to lose.

Katsuki was at the forefront of his mind, the only thing he thought about as he climbed the stairs to Hana’s apartment. When she opened the door, he felt his skin grow bumpy as a shiver chased down his spine.

Somehow, he was different than he’d been a few months ago. He was stronger than the man he remembered being when he was here. He no longer felt the need to cower when he walked inside, and there was no apology on his tongue.

Eijirou knew it was because of Katsuki.

Because someone else had taught him how to exist and without having to beg someone for forgiveness. No longer was his chest filled with the anxiety of wondering if he was walking too loud, or dressed too stupid, or if he looked at her the wrong way, or did something wrong.

“You need to stop,” he said immediately. He didn’t wait to walk all the way inside. Instead he stayed right by the front door firmly.

Hana looked at him with a face he’d grown too used to. Raise brows, feigned shock with underlying anger over the fact that this conversation wasn’t guided by her own manipulation.

“What are you talking about,” he she laughed.

But Eijirou wasn’t scared of her. He couldn’t be. He wasn’t her slave, and he didn’t owe her any sort of explanation. She knew exactly what he meant. She knew the calling was indecent, and the harsh voicemails were abusive. She knew, and perhaps that’s what made Eijirou’s hands tremble as he spoke.

“We broke up months ago. Stop calling the gym, or my friends, stop pestering Mina, and showing up at Bakugou’s shop.”

“Tch, so he’s still in the picture?” The woman threw her hands up, as if Katsuki had somehow been the thing to end their relationship.

As if Eijirou had been in the wrong, as if he’d seeked Katsuki out to cheat on Hana or something. Even talking about Katsuki to Hana felt wrong. She didn’t deserve to know about such a wonderful person.

“Yes, and you’re not. Leave us alone,” he said firmly.

His keys jingled with the force of his clenched fist. Eijirou had never been one to stand his ground. Embarrassingly, he usually took the beating and moved on. If this had happened at a different time, before he’d met Katsuki, he might’ve allowed her to call him and his friends over and over again until he was forced to come back to her.

But Katsuki had changed him. Or maybe not. Maybe he had only reminded him of who he was, of the fact that he was a treasure to certain people, and he deserved to be treated like a human being.

“So what, you’re just in love with that freak now?” Hana shouted. He could see the tears forming in her eyes, and even now he felt bad. He hated making her cry, he was /scared/ of making her cry, because that’s usually when their fights got ugly.

“He’s not a freak,” he hissed before he could think better of it. He wanted to be calm and collected for this, and wanted to remain strong, but he couldn’t.

Not when he had been trusted with Katsuki’s deepest secrets, and hidden truths. He’d never let someone speak ill of Katsuki.

“He’s using you, Eijirou. What? You babysit his kid while he gets fucked up? You’re not actually his boyfriend, you’re just someone dumb enough to get attached to his kid. He's using you.”

Eijirou shook his head, cringing at the mischaracterization of the other man, “No he’s not! I’m going on a date with him tonight! The only person that’s ever used me is you.”

Hana reeled back at the statement. Her face was red, and angry, but Eijirou didn’t cower. He wouldn’t. He was worthy of his existence, and he was allowed to speak. She wouldn’t take what Katsuki had shown him away.

When the woman had nothing to say Eijirou let out an exasperated sigh. Just being in this apartment made him feel drained. She didn’t know Katsuki, and if she did she’d never accuse him of using Eijirou.

“Whatever,” he grit his teeth. He didn’t want to waste anymore energy on this. “I don’t have to prove someone’s intentions with me to you. Just leave us alone.”

And he didn’t wait for a response. He didn’t stop when she screamed at him, or called him slurs for choosing a man, or when she slammed her door and followed him down the steps. He didn’t cry when he got in the car, didn’t get angry as he drove away, or scared when his phone lit up with another call from Hana.

Because he knew that he wasn’t taking a step backwards, or making a mistake. This was honestly the most sure he’d ever felt about anything in his entire life.

Maybe he wasn’t taking any steps at all. He wasn’t walking that treacherous line he’d grown so accustomed to. Wasn’t getting beat down by everyone around him or told to fit into a certain mood he wasn’t made for.

Maybe he was falling. Jumping off the original path, not because he had to but because he felt like it.

He was falling.

And he knew Katsuki would be there to catch him on the way down.

—

When Eijirou was in high school, his first date was to the movies with a girl who insisted on making out for the entire film and ended with his first ever (mediocre) handjob from someone other than himself. Another date he’d taken a girl to a museum, where she’d gotten bored and told him she wasn’t interested about an hour into the tour. One date had been to a carnival where they hooked up in a grimey bathroom instead of enjoying the actual festivities. One had been to the mall, where the girl met another guy and ditched him on the spot. When he met Hana, they didn’t go on dates, they just hooked up repeatedly and got together out of convenience.

But with Katsuki, Eijirou thinks he understands why people enjoyed going out on dates so often.

Because for once Eijirou actually felt respected, if that made any sense at all. When Katsuki drove his car to pick him up for dinner, he’d opened the car door for Eijirou, and held a hand on his thigh the whole drive there. They’d gone to dinner, and Katsuki had somehow noticed that Eijirou wanted dessert and ordered exactly what he’d wanted. Then when the bill came, Eijirou shoved it away and paid it.

It was strange, different, and not at all what he’d been expecting, because for all of the years Eijirou had spent dating, he’d only ever been stepped all over and heartbroken by the end of it. Past lovers had only ever let him down or taken advantage of him.

But Katsuki hadn’t. Once again, the blonde wasn’t just teaching him how love worked, but how much he deserved to be loved.

Eijirou could feel it with every gesture, and even when there wasn’t a gesture, he could feel the love radiating in Katsuki’s eyes for him. He couldn’t explain how he knew, he just knew that he did. He knew that Katsuki loved him too.

For the first time in his life he didn’t question if he was important to someone. He just knew it.

By the time they finished dinner it was already past nine and Katsuki had to pick up Katsumi and bring her home for bed. He’d apologized over and over, but Eijirou didn’t mind one bit. In fact, he’d somehow felt like thanking Katsuki for allowing him to join their tiny little family for the night, and wondered if one day it wouldn’t only be for a night.

Katsuki had insisted Eijirou join him back at their house for a movie once he put Katsumi to bed, which seemed unlikely with the way the little girl was currently sprinting to the front door of the flower shop, full of energy as she ran inside.

The two men shared a laugh for a moment as they followed her.

“How’d she get inside? I locked it,” Katsuki frowned after a second.

At first it seemed lighthearted.

But as they got closer, Eijirou felt a growing sense of uneasiness, or rather like something wasn’t right. Katsuki must’ve felt it too, because soon the two of them were walking faster towards the shop his daughter had slipped inside until they could see the lock.

Eijirou let out a gasp, “The locks are broken.”

And at the same time a shrill scream ripped through the silent night.

“Daddy!”

Katsuki threw the door open and Eijirou followed quickly to find that the flower shop had been completely destroyed. He felt the air punch out of his lungs, and his throat close up at the damage. House plants were ripped to shreds, bouquets were smashed into the concrete floors until the petals flattened, fruit trees were snapped and the fruits were stepped on. Glass pots shattered, vases obliterated.

The tip jar labeled ‘college fund’ was missing from its spot on the counter.

Someone had robbed them. In the time the two of them went out— no, in the time that Eijirou had made Katsuki close the shop to go out with him— someone had come to their flower shop and destroyed everything Katsuki had worked so hard on.

This was all his fault.

He should say something, should apologize, but Eijirou can’t even get the words out. All he can do is stand in the middle of what was once considered a beautiful hidden gem, and look at the mess he’d helped create.

Katsuki had completely neglected the obvious destruction and picked up his daughter quickly. He bounced her on his hip, patting her back and shushing her as she sobbed into the crook of his neck.

“The shop! The plants, daddy. Someone killed our plants!”

Sumi crying was something Eijirou had never, ever wanted to see. She was such a happy little girl. It didn’t feel right to see her so heartbroken.

It was all his fault.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Katsuki soothed her, pressing her tiny forehead under his chin to hide her eyes from this mess.

Eijirou had expected Katsuki to be crying too. After all, this was his everything. He’d moved out here five years ago and saved this shop from dying. His baby had grown up with these plants, /Katsuki/ had grown up with them too. But his face was completely blank, too far gone into parent mode to process his own feelings right now.

This was the part of parenthood Eijirou was scared of. The part that wasn’t all smiles and giggles. The part where an adorable little girl was terrified, and sobbing, and begging her dad to fix something he couldn’t fix.

Katsuki was good at it. Too good at it. So good that he neglected himself.

It was all his fault.

Katsuki glanced over at him in between whispering comforting words in his daughter's ear and mouthed, “Call the police for me.”

That was probably the only thing he’d done for the entire rest of the night that could be considered even remotely helpful. He’d called the police, and Camie, and they’d both rushed over. Camie took Katsumi upstairs to the condo and put her to bed, while Katsuki talked to the police for a long time.

And Eijirou just stood there. He didn’t do anything. He couldn’t do anything. Not just because he couldn’t stop something that had already happened, but also because Katsuki wouldn’t let him.

The blonde refused to be touched or hugged, refused to talk about it when the police looked for fingerprints, refused to even meet Eijirou’s eyes. He was sure it was because Katsuki was trying to keep it together while his world was falling apart, but it still sucked.

He still felt utterly useless.

But then, when the police went into the office to pull the security camera footage of tonight, Katsuki squeezed his arm and mumbled out a small, “Thank you.”

Part of Eijirou wanted to ask him what he was thanking him for, but he knew better than to do it right now. He could see the stress in the bags of Katsuki's eyes and the worry in his brow. Now wasn’t the time to get insecure and ask why Katsuki wouldn’t let him help.

“Is there anything I can do?” He asked instead.

But Katsuki just bit the inside of his lip and shook his head, “They’re gonna check our surveillance cameras. I’m sure that’ll give us some answers.”

When he said it his voice cracked against his will, causing him to clear his throat and look away for a moment. Eijirou ran a hand up the other man’s arm.

“Are you okay?” He asked softly.

“Yeah, Katsumi was just shaken up.”

But Eijirou wasn’t asking about Katsumi.

Yeah, he cared about the little girl as if she was an extension of his own heart, but he asked if Katsuki was okay. He hated that the blonde felt like his emotions weren’t just as important as his daughters.

Eijirou opened his mouth to talk, but stopped when Katsuki frantically checked all of his pockets.

“Shit! My wallet. I left it at your place. I need it,” he said.

“I’ll grab it. I’ll be back okay?” Eijirou started to walk towards the door, only stopping when he saw Katsuki’s face crumble in his peripheral vision.

He looked like he was about to cry, which was something Eijirou had never seen before. Not once had Katsuki broken down in front of him, but like hell would he leave the man to do it alone.

“Hey, you’re sure you’re okay?” He asked once more.

But Katsuki faked a grin, similar to what he did for his daughter, and told Eijirou to go.

—

It took every ounce of willpower Eijirou had within himself to leave Katsuki alone at the flower shop with all of the police crowding him. He tried to tell himself that this was important, that the blonde needed his wallet, but even so he still sprinted to his apartment, and up the stairs until he was practically gasping for air.

He swung the door open not caring that he must’ve left it unlocked as he dashed to the living room, but stumbled to a screeching halt when he noticed keys that weren’t his.

And a purse on the couch.

And dirt tracked in on his carpet.

And the college fund from the flower shop sitting on the coffee table.

His breath daughter in his throat and his heart began to race as his eyes trailed towards his ex-girlfriend sitting on his couch, looking at him expectantly, like she hadn’t just broken into his apartment.

Part of him was ready to fucking pounce. He wanted to grab Hana by the hair and drag her out of his apartment to the police station. He wanted to scream at her and say horrible things. Another part of him wanted to break down and fucking sobbing.

Because Hana had broken into Katsuki’s flower shop and destroyed everything.

And it really, truly was all Eijirou’s fault.

He let this happen. He made Hana angry and she retaliated.

Now he has to think calculatedly. Now he had to be careful with every word he spoke.

“Hana,” he let out a shaky breath. “Why do you have her college fund?”

“Did you think you could just cheat on me and I’d be fine with it? This is your fault,” he spat angrily.

Eijirou couldn’t stop the tear that rolled down his face. For Katsuki, for Katsumi, for the fucking flower shop, for Katsumi’s college fund, for /everything/ he’d just ruined.

“Cheat on you— Hana we’re done! We’ve been done for months,” he yelled back.

His voice was desperate, /he/ was desperate, because for the past few months he’d been saying this over and over again and he still could escape her. Even when he tried to be strong, even when he told himself he was free from her manipulation, she still had power over him.
Hana still knew exactly how to hurt Eijirou.

He let out a strangled sob. Katsuki would never forgive this. He’d hate Eijirou forever when he found out.

“How could you do this!? You broke into his shop and destroyed everything!”

Hana was on her feet quickly, trying to grab his hands even after he swiped them out of her hold.

“Because I love you!”

He backed away from the woman as she got closer and closer, “No you don’t. You never have!”

Eijirou ran a hand through his hair, choking on his own sob as he tried to stabilize himself. He couldn’t freak out yet. Katsuki was still at the flower shop looking for answers, and Eijirou had answers.

“Oh my god, I have to call the police,” he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

At that Hana seemed to finally piece together the fact that she’d committed an actual crime in her blind rage, and if Eijirou called the cops she’d end up in jail.

She grabbed his arm and pulled, “What? Don’t call the police. This is your fault! If you hadn’t been with that waste of space I wouldn’t have done this—“

Eijirou yanked his arm free, “Don’t fucking talk about him.”

“Eijirou!”

He lifted the phone to his ear, letting it ring for only a moment before a hand was flying straight into the left side of his face and the phone was flying off to the side. It stung, and his own hand went to cup it immediately.

She’d hit him.

His eyes were wide as the pain bloomed in the side of his face, but that didn’t stop him from running over to where his phone had slid.

Hana’s eyes followed him and soon they were both running towards it.

“Baby, wait, I didn’t mean to do that. Please don’t—“

But Eijirou was much faster. He grabbed the phone quickly, and locked himself in the bathroom.

—

The police came quickly, and took Hana away with little need to ask for Eijirou’s side of the story. It was pretty obvious that Hana had broken into his house and the flower shop, from the mud on her shoes and hands, and the overall insanity in her eyes when they arrived.

He didn’t mention that she’d hit him. He probably should’ve, but at the time he only had one objective in mind, and that was to get to Katsuki and tell him what happened before the police told him.

When he arrived at the flower shop, the police had already left, which sent a terrible feeling to his stomach. Eijirou ran up the stairs to the condos above, knocking on the door frantically. He hadn’t thought about what he’d say, he just knew that if he didn’t say anything Katsuki would despise him.

When the door opened, Katsuki looked tired, and angry.

And dejected. Like he’d completely stepped away. Like he was back to being closed off.

Like Eijirou had already lost him.

“Katsuki, I need to talk to you,” he pressed his hands together tightly, looking like a pathetic man begging.

“It was Hana,” Katsuki scoffed, looking down at the floor.

Eijirou nodded his head, feeling his heart jump out of his chest because Katsuki already fucking knew. He knew that Hana had done this, and that she’d done it because she was angry at Eijirou.

He knew this was all Eijirou’s fault.

“I know, she was at my apartment, I just called the police.”

At that Katsuki looked up at him with a deep scowl, “Why was she at your apartment?”

Eijirou reeled back at the power of the other man’s gaze. He’d never seen the blonde that angry before.

“I-I don’t know,” he felt himself stutter.

His eyes were filled with tears again.

He knew he had to say something, /anything/ to clear this all up. To fix this.

To make Katsuki look at him like he loved him again.

“I thought you changed the locks,” the blonde said through gritted teeth.

“I did but—“

“How did she even know we were out tonight?” Katsuki yelled.

Eijirou felt his own face contort at the other man’s voice. He’d never been on the bad side of Katsuki.

“What?” He swallowed down his own sob.

It was so obvious now that they were done.

That Katsuki was done with him.

That he was too much drama and baggage, and he didn’t want that anymore.

Eijirou had one chance to do this right, to prove to Katsuki that he could be a man worthy of being in his and his daughter’s lives.

“We’re usually open, but you convinced me to close. How’d she know we went out together tonight?” Katsuki hissed.

He looked so angry.

But beyond that he looked so far away from Eijirou. Shoulders broad, body protective of what was inside, of /who/ was inside. Eijirou had become someone Katsuki was scared to allow near his daughter.

And he couldn’t even blame Katsuki, because he was the goddamn reason all of this was happening.

“I told her,” Eijirou admitted as a sob escaped his mouth. “But it’s not what you think—“

“You said you blocked her number,” Katsuki interrupted him again.

“I /did/,” Eijirou answered immediately.

“So then you were with her,” Katsuki snapped back.

It was all happening so fast, and he could find an in for himself to say that all of this was a mess and it wasn’t how he wanted any of this to go. Eijirou hadn’t planned for any of this.

He’d thought he was doing the right thing. He thought that ending things with Hana would only help the two of them.

Eijirou squeezed his eyes shut tight, “Yes, I went to her house but not because we’re together—“

“Get out.”

His own eyes widened as Katsuki pointed his finger in the opposite direction of himself.

Eijirou had never felt so much dread in his life. It felt like someone had sliced open his stomach and yanked out all of his organs at once only to throw them on the ground. His chest ached, heart hammering in his chest as his brain repeatedly reminded him that he’s lost him.

He’s lost /them/.

“Katsuki please, let me explain,” he tried to grab the other man’s hand, but Katsuki pulled it back.

Eijirou knew better than to try and reach out for it again. He wouldn’t do what Hana had just done to him. He wouldn’t scare Katsuki.

“That’s not necessary. Get out of my house,”the blonde shook his head.

It was like Eijirou was staring at a whole different person. After all of this time spent memorizing the other man’s outline, dissecting Katsuki’s heartache and promising himself he wouldn’t become it, creating bonds with his daughter and imagining himself one day becoming her father.

Katsuki looked at him with a cold expression. Like they barely knew each other.

“I’m not with her! We’re not together,” he begged the other man to understand.

And he knew he looked like a mess. He knew his face was probably so red that Katsuki couldn’t see the spot Hana had just hit him. He knew tears and snot were falling down his face and staining the nice shirt he’d worn for their date. He knew his legs were bending and he was about to fall to the ground and beg the other man.

But he couldn’t stop it.

Because he’d lost everything tonight.

And it was all his fault.

“/Get out/.”

Katsuki’s tone was a warning. Dangerous, lethal. Two words he’d never thought to use when describing their conversation. Eijirou was no longer a safe space for Katsuki.

He was something Katsuki wanted to protect Katsumi from.

He was something Katsuki wanted to protect /himself/ from.

“Katsuki, I would never do anything to hurt you, you have to believe me. I didn’t know she would do this,” he croaked through a contorted face as he tried to will his tears away.

“Eijirou,” the blonde looked at him with those gorgeous scarlet eyes. Those same gorgeous eyes he’d grown so used to.

They still held fear, only this time it wasn’t fear for the world and the way it exiled him. It wasn’t fear for how people would treat her daughter as she grew into her own person. It wasn’t fear for what people thought of Katsuki's body, or his choice to carry his own baby.

It wasn’t any of that.

His eyes held fear because of Eijirou.

“If you don’t get the fuck out of my house, I’m going to call the police,” the blonde growled out through a face laced with pain.

There was nothing there anymore. No more trust, no more love, no more safety.

He’d put them in danger, and he knew Katsuki would do whatever he had to do to protect his daughter from any danger that came their way. Even if that meant losing Eijirou.

“Stay the hell away from me and my daughter.”

Chapter Text

The night was spent much like any other night, save for the little girl crawling into his bed sobbing from another nightmare, and the fact that Camie refused to leave and slept next to him. They have a guest room, but Deku and Ochako showed later into the night and insisted upon staying as well.

Katsuki knew they were worried. His best friends always were.

But honestly he can hardly feel anything at all. He’d hardly processed any of what happened tonight. Things had been going so well, so perfect with Eijirou.

And then he found out Eijirou had been meeting up with Hana.

He wanted to say everything he’d done was for the safety of Katsumi. That the way he drew out a new boundary was entirely emotionally charged because the shop he’d grown since Katsumi was born had been demolished by the woman Eijirou brought into their life.

But it has nothing to do with the shop, and only a fraction to do with Katsumi. Yes, of course he’s keeping his daughter and his damn shop safe, but that’s not why he cut Eijirou off and he knew that.

He was doing it so Eijirou couldn’t do it first. He was pushing the other man away before he could hurt Katsuki again. It should’ve been obvious, Katsuki shouldn’t have been such a fucking dumbass. He was baggage. He was the one with the baby, and the stressful life.

Of course Eijirou would go back to something familiar, something easier.

It just would’ve been nice to have been given a heads up. A two week warning so that when their unceremonious split did occur, Katsuki wouldn’t be laying in his bed with a hole in his chest, wondering what he could’ve done to make Eijirou choose him.

Like he said, he didn’t have time to worry about it.

He’d put Katsumi to bed three times tonight. Three times she’d crawled between him and Camie, with teary eyes and fearful gasps of air because she’d had another nightmare that whoever destroyed the shop came to their house and destroyed that too. His daughter was scared of a home invasion, scared someone would hurt her, scared she wasn’t safe, all at the age of five years old.

All because Katsuki just had to start dating.

God he was a fucking failure of a father. The one thing he’d always committed to was raising Katsumi, and the one time he slipped, the one time he tried to be selfish, he’d gotten the worst punishment.

He truly was just an extension of his daughter's life. He wasn’t meant to fall in love, or take risks, or date. Tonight was the universe's brutal reminder of that.

It’s five in the morning, and he’s half of himself. Somehow, unconsciously, he’d given the other half to Eijirou. He was the best in his life and he’d lost him, and that was it. That was the end. He got to experience him, in all of his kindness, all of his love, all of his sweet innocence and earnestness.

And then he left. He chose the easy path, with Hana. Katsuki was a job to Eijirou. Not something he really wanted but rather something he felt he had to do out of the goodness of his heart. He made Katsuki feel secure, and dare he say confident, and then he hurried back to something easier. Someone with less bullshit.

He stroked his daughters hair, rocking back and forth quietly so as to not wake Camie who was fast asleep next to him. Katsuki hadn’t laid down once tonight. Instead he sat up and cradled his daughter, lulling her back to sleep every few hours.

He couldn’t even mourn this. Couldn’t even cry. His daughter needed him to be okay. He needed to be the strong one right now, even though every piece of him was breaking. It should be easy to do this, to numb himself to everything going on around him. To not address the shit going on. But somehow Eijirou was like a hammer to his ribcage. The man had shown Katsuki how to let his guard down, only to be the one to hurt him most.

The door to his room quietly creaked open, and a mess of green curled poked inside. Deku quietly squinted in the dark.

“Can’t sleep?”

Katsuki shook his head. He’d just gotten Katsumi back down, and didn’t want to risk speaking and waking her up.

“Let’s go downstairs.”

—

After he was positive Katsumi would stay asleep, he quietly made his way down the stairs with Deku and to the destroyed remains of the flower shop. They worked quietly, mulling around the shop because there was really nothing to do with how devastating this robbery had been.

The only thing left unbroken was a wobbly shelf holding a large amount of plants that Katsuki had deemed too heavy to move on his own that morning. He took to peeling off the mangled limbs of the house plants off the concrete floors, and tossing them in a bag.

He could feel Deku’s eyes on him as he worked. He was worried, Deku always was.

But Katsuki seldom cried about the shit he constantly went through, and he wouldn’t start now. Especially in front of Deku. In all of the years of their friendship, Katsuki can only think of three times he’d cried in front of the other man; Once when he was six and he told Deku he wasn’t a girl, once when he eighteen and found out he was pregnant, and once again when Katsumi was one year old and had a fever that sent her to the emergency room.

“Do you want me to call Eijirou?” Deku said after a while.

And Katsuki could only grit his teeth, because Deku understood. He knew how much the redhead had meant to Katsuki, because he showed it. Katsuki let the world know that Eijirou was his person, his special flower shop visitor, his daughter's favorite friend, /Katsuki’s/ favorite friend.

“No.”

His voice was cold. Cold enough for Deku to straighten his back from where he’d been bending to gather the broken bouquet rack. Katsuki didn’t meet his concerned gaze, because he knew his friend would only make this into a big deal. And it wasn’t a big deal. Katsuki had already known going into this that Eijirou would never want to be with him like that. Getting with Katsuki meant becoming a father to a child that wasn’t Eijirou’s, and loving a man so full of baggage he can’t even talk about.

Offhandedly, he mentions, “We’re done.”

It curdled his insides to admit out loud, even though it was Katsuki's decision to begin with. Eijirou had put his daughter in danger, and couldn’t decide if he wanted them or not.

“You broke things off with him? Why? You two were perfect together!” Deku’s eyes practically popped out of his skull. He dropped the bag of dead flowers at his side and got closer to the blonde.

Katsuki continued to throw away leaves and torn vines, shaking his head, “He couldn’t make up his damn mind.”

The green haired man threw his hands up in the air, “What are you talking about? He seemed pretty dead set on you.”

This was why he didn’t want to tell shitty fucking Deku. He swore the man acted more like a concerned parent than his actual parents.

Katsuki let out an annoyed huff before he looked at the other man, motioning around to the shop like it was obvious. It was. It should’ve been. Hana did this, and Deku knew that.

“His girlfriend did this shit. He was with her the other day,” he tried not to get frustrated.

But getting angry was his default. When he felt like crying, or screaming, or falling on the ground and just fucking dying, he numbed himself to anger.

“Doing what?” Deku frowned in obvious confusion.

“Who fucking knows,” Katsuki shook his head as he aggressively threw a once beautiful monstera plant into the garbage bin.

There was no saving the poor thing, just like there was no saving the budding relationship that might’ve happened between him and the redhead.

Katsuki had hoped that Deku would drop it after that, much like he usually did when he pitied him. But he didn’t drop it at all. In fact, to the blonde's surprise, Deku actually started to yell.

“You didn’t even ask? What if he was ending things with her for good? What if—“

“The what if’s don’t matter. This shit was never going to fucking work anyways,” Katsuki yelled back.

Deku raked his fingers through his curls angrily before throwing his hands out, and snapping, “What the hell are you talking about? Did he say that?”

“No—“

“So you’re backing out? Again? You’re ruining something good again,” the man concluded on his own.

And Katsuki wanted to hit him. Just from the look on the other man’s face, he could tell Deku was disappointed. He was no stranger to disappointing people. He disappointed his parents, his friends, his ex boyfriend, his fucking teachers. Katsuki had disappointed everyone.

That was why he left. Deku was the one who wanted to find him. Deku is the one who needed to chase after him.

So he doesn’t get to be disappointed. Not when he’s the one who chose to come back to katsuki’s fucking shit show.

“It was ruined when it started,” he yelled at the other man.

Eijirou had been going back and forth between Katsuki and Hana since the day they met. Katsuki was a convenient distraction from Hana when she was being an abusive partner, and when she wasn’t he was buying her flowers from Katsuki’s shop. That’s all this was. Eijirou never wanted something serious with him to begin with.

“He loved you, you idiot, what on earth are you saying?!” Deku matched his pitch.

“I let him see me and he backed out!” Katsuki raised his voice even louder, as if that gave him any leverage in this situation.

He was obviously weaker than Izuku. Nothing would ever put him out on top. Deku was married, happy, and born in the right body. Katsuki was just his messy friend. The guy who couldn’t get his life together.

But he wasn’t Deku’s problem to fix. He wasn’t anyone’s thing to fix.

“I let him see me Izuku, and I promised myself I would never let someone see me like that after Katsumi’s bio dad left us,” Katsuki felt his eyes start to sting and his own voice wavering at the admission.

It’s the first he’d ever talked about it. First he’d thought about it too. He’d been so worried about Katsumi, and making sure the girl was eating at dinner and sleeping between her nightmares that he hadn’t even admitted to himself why he was so fucking heartbroken over this.

But it’s so painfully obvious.

Eijirou had taken Katsuki's tattered and bruised heart and held it softly in his hands, only to turn around and squeeze it until it was nothing but bloody mush. He’d gotten Katsuki's full trust, and broken it. He’d fooled Katsuki.

And it hurt worse than any pain he’d ever felt in his miserable life because he really, really wanted it to work this time.

“So, please, /please/, stop talking about how I’m not letting myself be happy. You have no idea what it’s like to give yourself away only to be given it back again.”

He was sure he sounded pathetic, begging the other man to stop helping him. To just let him be sad and miserable.

But it got Deku to shut up. He still looked angry, which was new, but at least he wasn’t yelling. Katsuki was sure Deku had reached his breaking point with him.

“Kirishima wasn’t giving it back,” Deku said quietly.

Katsuki scoffed, “You’re right, he was just using it.”

The other man let out a slow, angry release of air through his nose. Like he was holding back. Like there was so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to yell about, but was trying not to. Katsuki was so sick of it. He was so tired of people caring about him and then hurting him. Maybe he was a selfish man, always playing the victim, but he was fucking tired.

“Kacchan, you’re going to live a very sad, lonely, hurtful life if you keep pushing people who care about you away like this,” Deku said calmly.

Katsuki clicked his tongue before walking behind the counter, in front of the only standing shelf of plants. The cash register had been broken too. He’d never be able to pay for Sumi’s college.

His life was a joke. A horrible, miserable, lonely joke. He didn’t need Deku to tell him that again.

“I already knew that,” he snapped.

And in that split second he knew he’d pushed too hard. He knew as soon as Deku kicked a stray water pail that Bakugou had finally broken the other man’s peace.

“Well I guess you know everything, right? Nothing is ever right unless you think of it first huh?” Deku hissed.

Katsuki stared at him with wide eyes. The other man was pissed. Their fights never got like this. He’d never made Deku so upset that he would actually match Katsuki’s harsh demeanor.

“Get pregnant in high school, don’t tell your best friend, vanish the week before graduation—“

“Deku, stop it,” he leaned back in disgust.

Why was he bringing this up right now? They never talked about him leaving. They never fully addressed Katsuki running away, or how he never told Deku about the baby. It was always something Katsuki was too scared to talk about. It was too hard to admit that he’d fucked up so terribly by not reaching out to Izuku.

“Have your baby, hide her from your friends, your family,” Deku continued, voice growing louder and full of venom with each word.

“Stop it!” Katsuki shouted.

“You don’t realize the shit you do or say, or how it hurts anyone other than yourself!” Deku yelled over him, pouting his finger in the blonde's face.

“Fuck you,” Katsuki shoved the other man hard enough to send him stumbling back on his feet. “You don’t think I regret it? You think I don’t lay awake at night destroying myself over the fact that I shut you and everyone else out of my life?”

Leaving Deku was arguably the hardest part of running away. Realizing he would be eighteen, a single parent, homeless, /and/ he’d lose Deku. It was the hardest decision he’d ever had to make.

But he’d done it for Deku. He’d left so the other man wouldn’t worry, wouldn’t skip graduation, wouldn’t stop enjoying his life just because Katsuki had fucked up his own.

Deku shot him a glare, and only then could Katsuki see the tears streaming down the man’s face.

“If you really regretted it, you’d stop this shit with Kirishima. You’d be honest about how you feel and you’d stop fucking pushing.”

He didn’t want to talk about this. Eijirou wanted Hana, not Katsuki. The past few months had all just been some joke that Katsuki hadn’t caught onto.

“Just—go. Leave, I want you to leave,” Katsuki pointed at the door.

Deku let out a tired laugh despite the tears on his face.

“Yep. Just keep fucking pushing until you and Katsumi have nothing left.”

As the man walked to the door Katsuki felt his face heat up, and his own eyes filled with tears. Because Deku was right. He’s never been able to give his daughter the life she deserved.

He watched as Deku walked out of the door, and maybe out of his entire life this time. When the door slammed, it sent the shop shaking.

The last thing Katsuki heard was the sound of the giant, wobbly, wooden shelf behind him snapping and the sound of everything breaking on his body as he fell to the floor with it. The heavy glass pots shattered on his back, on his skull. Ceramics spilled against his skin until the weight of the shelf crushed him into the concrete floor of his destroyed shop.

His consciousness didn’t last long.

He vaguely heard Deku screaming, and felt the shelf shifting. He hardly felt the way his arm was bent the wrong way, or how his forehead was sliced open. The sheer weight of the shelf was enough to knock the air out of his lungs and send him hurtling towards unconsciousness.

—

Eijirou woke up to the sound of his phone chiming before the sun had risen. Blindly, he reached out for his phone, knocking various things off of his nightstand in the process. One look at his clock reassured him that he hadn’t overslept and it was just past five in the morning. He squinted at the caller in confusion before answering.

“Hey Midoriya—“

“Kacchan is hurt,” the other man sobbed.

He was out of his bed in a heartbeat, tripping as his foot got caught in the sheet, practically breaking both ankles as he ran to his closet.

“What?! What do you mean hurt? Where is he?” Eijirou wasted no time in yanking off his sleep pants for a change of sweats and a clean shirt.

“He’s been taken to the emergency room, I had to call emergency services,” Midoriya said frantically on the other side of the phone.

“What happened? Where is Katsumi,” Eijirou begged.

“Katsumi’s with me, we’re headed to the hospital. She’s okay,” the other man sniffed.

Eijirou grabbed his keys off the table and tugged on the first pair of shoes he could find.

“I’m on my way.”

—

It didn’t hit Eijirou that he was driving straight towards the man that just told him to stay away from him and his daughter until he was walking into the hospital waiting room.

He didn’t have much time to really dwell on it either, because the first thing he saw when he walked inside had him forgetting all logic and jumping straight to what felt more like instinct than anything else.

“Eiji,” the little girl he’d grown so used to seeing everyday stood in the middle of the hospital room like a lost child.

Deku was on the phone, while Camie seemed to be trying to get more information from the poor nurse at the front desk.

But Katsumi. His sweet little Katsumi came running to him with big tears rolling down her face and patchy red skin from crying. Her little arms reached up for him, and Eijirou wasted no time in pulling her up into his arms. He hugged her tightly as she cried, tiny hands gripping onto his shirt like she needed him right now. Her father was missing, and she probably had no idea what was happening.

“Katsumi,” he said softly, mimicking the movements he’d seen her father do when he was trying to get her to stop crying.

He ran his fingers through her hair and swayed back and forth, pressing kisses on the top of her head every once in a while as she cried in his arms. Eijirou had never done this before. He’d never been in the position to care for a child that relied on him so heavily. Part of him felt proud to know that Katsumi trusted him enough to have this meltdown.

“My daddy. They won’t let me see my daddy,” she sobbed out.

He clutched her tighter, heart aching at the way her innocence betrayed her. She didn’t understand why they were at the hospital, or what was happening. Katsumi was just caught in the crossfire of whatever led to this outcome.

“He’s okay sweetheart.”

He doesn’t know that. Eijirou doesn’t have a clue as to what happened at all.

But he knew that Katsuki would want someone to comfort his daughter right now. He knew that the last thing the man had ever wanted in the world was for his daughter to be crying all alone in a scary place like the hospital.

As he continued to soothe the little girl her sobs became small hiccups, and then sniffles until eventually she had tired herself out and fallen asleep in his arms. It wasn’t until then that Deku hung up the phone and joined the two of them.

“What happened,” he asked softly as to not wake the little girl.

“We got into an argument while we were cleaning up the shop, and I,” Deku gritted his teeth as his eyes filled with tears again. “I slammed the door and the back shelf collapsed on him. He was unconscious when I ran back inside.”

Eijirou felt his stomach lurch. The back shelf was huge, and heavy from what he remembered. It housed the plants that Katsuki was nursing back to life, but had been wobbly for months.

If that fell on the other man, then that meant he was hurt pretty badly.

“Did she see?” He asked, motioning towards the sleeping girl in his arms.

Deku wiped his face, “No. She was asleep.”

“Have there been any updates,” he asked when he saw Camie walking back from the front desk.

“They’re taking him for an MRI. They stitched up the bloody parts. I don’t know the extent of his injuries,” she explained in a tired voice. “All we can do is wait.”

Deku nodded his head and soon the two of them were sitting on either side of Eijirou.

“Mitsuki and Masaru will be here soon,” Deku mentioned to him.

Strangely, they didn’t seem angry at him at all, even though they should be. The shop is destroyed because of him. Katsuki is hurt because of his crazy ex-girlfriend. They should be yanking the little girl from his hands and sending him away right now.

But instead they sat with him, and updated him. They let him be a part of this, they wanted him to be a part of this.

The silence stretched on for a good long while, and dread ate at Eijirou’s stomach when not a single update was provided. Katsuki was tough, but a fucking shelf could hurt anybody, and with head injuries you could hardly predict the outcome. What would happen if Katsuki never woke up? What would happen if Eijirou didn’t get to fix all of this? What would he do without Katsuki?

What would happen to Katsumi if she lost her father.

He shook his head. Fuck that, he’s not thinking about that. Nope, absolutely not.

“Kiri? Why’re you here?” A voice pulled him from his thoughts and when he looked up he found Todoroki standing in front of him in his scrubs.

He’d almost forgotten the other man was working at this hospital as he studied nursing.

“Where is Bakugou?” The man asked when he noticed the little girl in his arms.

“He’s hurt,” Eijirou said plainly because he still had no fucking clue what was happening to the other man.

Todoroki’s eyes widened, “I’ll find out what's going on. Call our friends.”

—

Emergency surgery for his arm, concussion, stitches in his hairline and left cheek, and a sprained back. Those were katsuki’s injuries according to Todoroki. He’d be in emergency surgery for his arm for quite a bit of time.

About an hour in, the squad showed up along with Katsuki’s parents. Eijirou hadn’t moved from his spot in his chair, too worried about Katsumi to function for himself. He wondered if that’s what Katsuki thought every second of his life. If every decision he made was only made after carefully thinking about how it would affect Katsumi first.

“Midoriya it’s not your fault,” Kaminari patted the other man’s back.

Eijirou had a sneaking suspicion that whatever the fight between Midoriya and Katsuki was about was really, really ugly. Judging by the man’s face, he’d say some things were said that they both probably needed to apologize for. Eijirou wished Katsuki were here right now so that he could be comforted too. He was sure whatever happened had hurt the blonde, even though he hid his pain.

“I’m the reason the shelf fell, of course it’s my fault.”

Deku had his hands pressed through his hair and his elbows on his knees as he cried for maybe the third time in the past hour.

“The shelf was already unstable. There’s no way a door slamming could’ve caused it to fall,” Eijirou sighed. “It was probably Hana’s doing. I’m sorry.”

At that, everyone went silent. They were all still testing to digest what happened tonight. Nobody had expected Hana to be that fucking insane, or to end up in jail.

“He’ll be okay. They said nothing was life threatening, it's just,” Deku continued, squeezing his eyes shut tightly. “So many people have hurt him, I never thought I’d be one of them.”

Kaminari gave him an apathetic look before grabbing his shoulder, “Bro, please let me buy you a coffee or something.”

The other man guiltily accepted Kaminari’s offer and Eijirou silently thanked his friend for getting Midoriya away. He liked the man, but the constant crying only made Eijirou feel worse about the situation and reminded him that all of this was happening because of Eijirou.

Sero and Mina went to check in with Todoroki again, while Kami took Midoriya and Bakugou’s parents to the cafe.

“She fell asleep fast,” Camie smiled softly. The woman ran her fingers through Katsumi’s hair as she slept.

“She feels safe with you.”

Eijirou didn’t know what to say to that. He swallowed thickly and smiled instead.

Today would probably be the last time he’d ever get to take care of Katsumi. After today, Katsuki would keep the little girl away, and he’d have every right to do so. she wasn’t Eijirou’s daughter even though he truly wished she was. She wasn’t anything to him and he wasn’t anything to her. Katsuki didn’t want them to be. Katsuki was scared of Eijirou.

“You know it’s not your fault too, right?” Camie asked when he didn’t respond.

Eijirou smiled as he swallowed down his emotions, “I’m not sure Katsuki would agree.”

“Katsuki knows,” she assured him. “He knows it's not your fault.”

He nodded silently, not really trusting what Camie was saying. Katsuki seemed pretty dead set on keeping Eijirou away from him because of this. He was going to call the police if he didn’t leave yesterday. Katsuki definitely thought he had somehow helped Hana commit this crime. Otherwise, why would Katsuki have cut him off the way he did?

“You know, when Katsumi came around he ran away. He changed his phone number, deleted his social media, even changed his email address.”

Eijirou nodded, “Yeah he told me.”

He wasn’t sure why she was telling him all this, but felt the need to listen regardless. Camie was somewhat of an enigma to him. She and Katsuki were so close, but she was the exact opposite of him. She was always goofing off, always so unserious and goofy like all of Eijirou’s friends. But she cared so deeply about him, in a way that bordered more than friends but not quite romantic. Platonic soulmates, Eijirou assumed.

“Did he ever tell you why?” The woman asked.

At first he thought she was asking to find the answer for herself, but after a moment it was clear that Camie already knew the answer. He thought about it anyway.

Katsuki had said he left because he couldn’t face anyone. He said it was too hard, because nobody wanted to be friends with a pregnant high schooler.

But Eijirou knew that wasn’t true. Especially now that he knew Midoriya and Camie well enough, he knew that the two of them would never turn their backs on him, even if people looked at them as outcasts.

“No, I guess I don’t know why,” he answered.

Camie hummed before stretching her legs out in front of her, leaning back in her chair as she prepared herself to speak. Shit like this was hard to talk about. He could see it in her face. Like he said before Camie wasn’t a very serious person.

But for the first time since he’d met Camie, she seemed to have worry in her brow. A furrow he’d never once thought would manifest on her usually mellow brow. She chewed on her bottom lip, like this conversation wasn’t spur of the moment, but rather something she’d been holding onto for years. Like maybe she’s always wanted to get this out, for herself, for Katsuki, for anyone who would listen. But something, or more likely someone always stopped her. Katsuki, always brushing off her worries, always taking every senseless beating life offered him, always rolling with the punches because there wasn’t any other option.

“He thought I’d leave him,” she spoke softly, though Eijirou could see her bottom lip quiver.

This pained her. Maybe it was the fact that she hadn’t proved herself as someone who would stay for Katsuki. Maybe it was because despite the fact that she had proven herself as someone who would stay, Katsuki had left anyway.

“He thought I would look at him and his baby and leave him. Can you believe that?” She laughed this time, though he saw resentment in her eyes.

Camie probably bit her tongue on so many occasions, watching Katsuki fall apart and build himself back up, just to be dragged down again.

Eijirou inherently understood. He didn’t have to live through everything Katsuki went through like Camie or Deku, but even hearing the admissions fall from Katsuki’s lips made him sick.

A stray tear fell from her own face and Eijirou gave her a look of sympathy. She wiped it quickly before shrugging her shoulders, playing it off like her own heart wasn’t split in two by Katsuki as well.

It all made sense now.

Katsuki pushed.

He pushed and pushed until nobody could hurt him. He shoved people away so they had no chance of getting into his orbit and somehow breaking him down. Even people who had good intentions were cut out.

“Anyways,” Camie smiled. Eijirou could tell it was forced. “You scared him. He got close to you and he thought you’d leave too, so he started to push you away.”

Katsuki pushed him away. Eijirou scared him, so he tried to cut him off. Eijirou slowly pieced the words together like an intricate puzzle that he so badly wanted to solve.

Did this mean Katsuki really didn’t hate him? Did he do this because he was scared to want more with him? He felt his heart drop. It was all so fucking confusing.

But he didn’t want to give up. Not without telling Katsuki what his intentions were. Not until the man knew how much he loved him, how he’d choose Katsuki over and over again, how nothing in this world could make him abandon him.

“You’ll fix this, right?” Camie asked knowingly.

Eijirou nodded, “I’ll fix it.”

—

Somehow Katsuki is eighteen.

He swears he’d been older before.

But right now he’s eighteen again, and his boyfriend is yelling at him and he’s crying. He’s crying so hard, so painfully that he fears he might throw up all over the pregnancy test in his hands.

“I’m done! I told you I didn’t want to fucking be with you because of this, but you just had to get pregnant!”

The man screamed at him like Katsuki was the one who was supposed to wear a condom. He screamed at him like he wasn’t pregnant with his child. He screamed at Katsuki like he was a fucking monster.

And yet, Katsuki begged. Why? Why was he begging? Stop begging, they’ll be better off without this guy.

“Please Takeshi, please don’t leave me. I need help, I can’t have it by myself. I love you—“

“No!” The other man snapped at him.

He grabbed Katsuki's arm violently, yanking him off of his bed and practically dragging him down the staircase of his parents house before shoving him out the door.

“I want nothing to do with that disgusting thing,” he’d said.

And then Katsuki was all alone, tears running down his face, chest hollow with the feeling of being unwanted, heart broken to smithereens.

Somehow he walked into the kitchen of his parents but he can’t remember driving there. He still can’t recall if he’s actually eighteen or not, but at the moment he is, and there’s a noticeable swell in his stomach.

And his parents are so disappointed.

“What happened to college Katsuki? You said you’d become a lawyer! You can’t be a father and a lawyer!” His mother had never looked as angry as she did on this day.

They’d just found out he was pregnant. He’d kept it a secret for three months, and chalked up his mood swings and morning sickness to the breakup with his boyfriend.

“I’ll go to college after the baby. There’s nothing wrong with taking a few years off,” he reasons with them.

His father pressed his eyes to the palms of his hands as he let out a disappointed sigh.

“I really think it’s best you get rid of it, Katsuki,” he’d told him.

Katsuki felt his eyes swell with tears. How could they say that to him? How could the father of his child, and his own parents tell him to get rid of his child?

“I don’t want to,” he croaked.

He’d grown attached to the baby the minute he found out it existed. There was no way he was getting an abortion. Even if people didn’t understand him, even if he had to give up everything, it was his baby. He wanted to have his baby.

“Then you can’t stay here,” his mother snapped, slamming her hand against the table and sending the silverware jumping.

“What?”

“If you want to be an adult so badly then you’d better learn how to do it on your own. This is your baby, your responsibility. Not ours.”

He’s eighteen right now, but somehow he finds himself thinking he’d never do this to his daughter. The daughter he doesn’t even know yet.

Katsuki’s tears drip from his face as his parents abandon him, and he can’t tell if the sickness in his gut is from the feeling of being pushed away or from the baby that everyone wants him to get rid of. He cried and cried in that house until he was just about ready to have his baby.

And then when he looks down at his shirt, he’s in a fucking hospital gown, and there’s a teeny little person crying in his arms, and she’s gross and squishy and sort of looks like a gremlin.

But he’s so proud. Because that’s his Katsumi.

He’s so entirely alone in the hospital room. It’s only him and a few nurses who cleaned off the wailing gremlin before handing her to him. His mother and father disowned him for her. His fair weather friends turned their backs on him because of her. His whole life was put on an indefinite hold for her.

And yet, he loved her like nothing else in this world. There’s no regret in his chest, no resentment in his head, no heavy feeling in his lungs. He loved Katsumi in a way he didn’t even think was possible.

When he turned his head, there’s someone else there. Someone who has always been so proud of him despite his shortcomings. Someone who he’d wished he’d really met when he was eighteen. Someone who should’ve been Katsumi's biological father.

Eijirou is there, with him, looking at the tiny baby like she’s the greatest thing in the world. He’s not shouting at him, or shoving him away in disgust. Eijirou loves him, and Katsuki doesn’t have to beg.

He’s here with him, and their new born baby.

But Eijirou isn’t eighteen. Eijirou is the twenty three year old man he’d met a few months ago at his flower shop.

And Katsuki isn’t eighteen either.

He’s twenty three, and his baby is a five year old, and all of this happened so long ago—

He gasps for air and light suddenly floods his vision. It’s too bright, and his headaches immediately at the sight. There’s a steady beep from a monitor next to him, and his eyes flood with tears as he blinks awake.

He’s dreaming.

After blinking a few more times, Katsuki realizes he’s back in the hospital.

Was he alone? Did anybody care that he was here? Why was he here anyways?

“Katsuki,” a voice asked softly off to his side.

Someone was here?

Katsuki turned his face to look off to the side, wincing at the pain in his back and cheek. It takes him a moment to get all of the pieces in his brain sick in order. It takes him even longer to understand that Eijirou is here, and Katsuki isn’t eighteen at all and hasn’t been for five years. Katsuki and Eijirou were fighting. The shop was destroyed. His daughter was terrified.

Katsuki was supposed to be alone.

“You’re here,” he felt himself saying, because he still felt a little floaty and couldn't quite get a grip on why Eijirou was here.

Why? Why is he here?

He’d gotten what he wanted. Katsuki let him off easy, he’d given Eijirou an out. Eijirou should be at home with Hana, with the normal twenty three year old girl he belonged with. There was no reason he had to be here.

“Of course I’m here,” Eijirou softly ran a hand down his thigh below the blanket.

He was here. Eijirou was here. His brain felt groggy, and he couldn’t seem to wrap his head around the fact that Eijirou was sitting in this horribly bright hospital room with him right now.

Katsuki wasn’t alone in the hospital again. He wasn’t having a baby this time, and he didn’t have to hold a random nurse's hand. Eijirou was here now.

Even after Katsuki had pushed him away, after he’d ruined all of their progress, he was /here/.

“Is this another dream,” he felt himself ask.

His back hurt, his head ached, the side of his face felt numb and packed with gauze, and his knuckles felt raw and cracked when he moved his fingers.

It couldn’t be a dream this time, not with how terribly everything hurt. He doesn’t remember what really happened, or why he’s here now, but he knows something happened.

Eijirou let out a soft huff of air, “No, you’re awake.”

His hand was holding his leg so softly, so tenderly.

Would he have done this if things had been different. If this was five years ago, and Katsuki was having Katsumi. Would Eijirou have touched him so kindly, and made him believe that he wasn’t a nasty excuse of a man. Would Eijirou have yelled at the nurses who’d given him a strange look when he said he was here for his scheduled c-section.

It doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter. Because that was five years ago, and Katsuki did it all alone, and Eijirou wasn’t /his/. He didn’t belong to Katsuki. Katsuki sent him away.

Katsuki let him choose Hana.

Eijirou would stay with Hana, and he’d become a distant memory of what failure looked like.

He felt his face contort, biting his lower lip as he violently tried to hold back his tears. But he couldn’t. He was weak, and maybe he could blame it on the fact that his whole body fucking ached, but he knew it wasn’t that. No, it wasn’t his physical injuries that caused the terrible sob that ripped through him.

It was the man in front of him.

Katsuki’s soul was mourning the loss of Eijirou. Grieving the fact that Eijirou had chosen someone else and that he’d allowed him to do so. Katsuki had no redeemable qualities that would make the man stay.

He was never able to make anyone stay. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that when he pushed Eijirou backed away. He should be so fucking gutted over the fact that Eijirou was with Hana, fooling Katsuki into thinking he was actually someone’s first choice for once.

It shouldn’t bother him.

But it really does.

It really, really, hurt him.

Because Katsuki was right back where he started. He was alone, unwanted, unneeded. He was a toy to be played with and thrown away once someone got bored. He meant nothing to Eijirou and had no redeemable qualities to convince the other man he could mean something eventually.

“Don’t leave me,” he cried through clenched teeth.

And he shouldn’t say it. He should do this to Eijirou. The other man shouldn’t have to sit there and listen to Katsuki pathetically plead for him to choose Katsuki over someone else. Anyone else would be easier, better even. Eijirou deserved better. He deserved to start a life the correct way, without a partner who already had a baby and screwed up his life and relationship at the young age of eighteen.

He deserved someone who wasn’t selfish enough to drag him down into his self deprecating pit of despair.

Eijirou’s eyes widened as Katsuki let out a sob, and he rolled his chair closer so he could gather all of the blonde up in his arms as he cried heavily.

“Katsuki,” his voice was so full of concern, so scared of whatever caused his sudden tantrum.

Katsuki shouldn’t be crying. He was acting like a child, throwing a fit because Eijirou was seeing his girlfriend while he simultaneously opened Katsuki up and healed his broken parts.

But the only thing Katsuki has ever known is to beg. Beg for love, beg for support, beg for forgiveness, beg for someone to look at him and choose him and continue to choose him.

And so if he had to he’d do it, if he had to beg for Eijirou to choose him over Hana he’d get down on his hands and knees and plead like the pathetic high schooler he used to be. He do anything for the other man to stay, and it’s fucking embarrassing and degrading, but he doesn’t know what else he can do.

“Please, please choose me,” Katsuki felt his lungs empty out as the other man took him into his arms in a bone crushing hug.

He was crying louder than he’d ever let himself cry. Katsuki can’t remember a time he’d ever cried in front of someone other than Deku. He’d spent so many nights crying himself to sleep when he was pregnant, and even more after he’d had his baby and realized his body would never be what he wanted it to be. Katsuki had cried so much in his daughter's first year of life that eventually all of the pain he had to go through felt like a dull ache. He’d ignored the heartache long enough for it to become something he no longer processed and only built up inside of himself.

“What?” Eijirou asked, because he didn’t understand.

How could he? Katsuki was never honest with how he felt about Eijirou. He never made an effort to be more than a casual fuck, and that’s all the other man saw him as.

But even so, in his fit of desperation all he could do was plead. The image of Eijirou with anyone else was too much to bear. Eijirou with a woman, Eijirou with a man, Eijirou raising a child that wasn’t Katsumi, Eijirou laying in a bed that Katsuki couldn’t share. He hated it. It made his chest ache so hard he could hardly breath, and the sons that tore through his throat felt like blades against his vocal cords.

“Choose me over her, please. I’ll do anything, so please choose me and Katsumi. Please,” he gripped Eijirou’s shirt tightly despite the fact that hours ago he had been ready to let him go.

He’d told himself he had to be ready. He had to do what was right for Katsumi.

But what about him? What about what felt right for /Katsuki/?

Eijirou’s body tensed when his sobs became wails. He couldn’t help it. He couldnt stop crying. It all just hurt, and he didn’t know how to make it go away. Katsuki didn’t know how to be an adult, he wasn’t even ready to be an adult.

“Don’t go,” Katsuki cried, ignoring the way his own voice echoed through the hospital room. “Please don’t go.”

Eijirou hugged him so tight that a sharp shooting pain jolted through his back, but even so it didn’t stop the sobs that echoed through his room and probably into the halls.

“I’m right here,” the redhead promised, and when Katsuki didn’t stop he pressed his fingers into his messy blonde hair. “I’m here, I’m here.”

Katsuki knew that. He can feel the other man here.

But he can feel the confines of every single thing he’d held in for the past five years snapping and breaking, and he’s pouring out onto this linoleum floor for everyone to see.

He’s finally reached his breaking point, and for once he doesn’t care that Katsumi is right outside of the room. He doesn’t care that he can see his parents with a sickly look on their faces through the crack in the door, as they finally realize that their son can’t handle all of this on his own and he needed someone, /anyone/ to fucking care about him. He didn’t care that he sounded like a pussy, or that he was begging for a fucking man and setting a bad example for his daughter.

Because this was his /life/. His fucking life that /did/ exist contrary to everyone, even his own, belief that he was merely an extension of his daughter.

In a minute he’d swallow it. He’d take all of this hurt and cram it back into a box uncomfortably. He’d suck it all back up and be a father, because having his baby was his choice, and he had to be responsible for the decisions he’d made.

But just this once, in Eijirou’s arms, he let himself break. He let himself cry, practically wailing into the other man’s shoulder, staining his shirt with tears and snot and god knows what else.

He let himself cry for the shop, and for the fear it put in his daughter. For the college savings he pretended he didn’t count each night that were stolen away. He cried for the plants that had grown with Katsumi, the flowers that had bloomed when Camie and Deku found him again, the potted plants that had been crushed and mangled and ruined.

And then he let himself mourn his graduation, and his broken bond with his friends and his parents. He cried for being shoved away in disgusted when he held that pregnancy test out for his boyfriend to see, and then he sobbed again when he saw himself at seventeen kneeling at the foot of his boyfriends bed as he begged for him to stay despite him not being what he’d originally wanted.

He sobbed and sobbed and sobbed, until his lungs ached and his chest burned.

And Eijirou stayed.

Even though Katsuki was sure he’d shove away and tell him to get over it, even though every fiber in Katsuki’s being believed that Eijirou would much rather be with Hana, a normal twenty three year old that did have all this baggage.

Eijirou cradled his head with his hand, pressing his face into the crook of his neck as he cried, holding all the broken pieces of Katsuki together as he begged to fall apart.

He could feel the bigger man’s fingers as they tangled in his hair, holding him close as his warm breath whispered against Katsuki’s ear.

“I’ll always choose you, Katsuki. There’s no competition there. It’ll always be you for me.”

But that couldn’t be true. Not after everything.

He’d chosen Hana. He’d gone back to Hana after Eijirou realized how fucking awful being with Katsuki was. Eijirou has made a fool of Katsuki, he’d been seeing the woman this entire time and only doing all of this with Katsuki because he’d felt bad or something.

“You lied,” Katsuki sobbed.

“I didn’t, you have to know that I didn’t lie to you. Me and her have been done ever since that night months ago,” Eijirou’s voice was firm and held no room for opposition.

But he could only shake his head as he cried, because he didn’t /believe/ Eijirou anymore.

He was pathetic. Sobbing yet again over a man that didn’t want him. Begging another man to stay for him when he was at his goddamn lowest, because Katsuki knew who he was. He knew that nobody wanted him and if there was even a sliver of interest in him he had to fucking plead for it.

But Katsuki couldn’t do this anymore.

It was all too much, all at once. People told him this made him stronger. Everyone, from regulars at the flower shop, to his closest friends. They all told him that all of this shit he’d gone through— having the baby at eighteen, living on his own, losing his own parents because they wanted him to abort the pregnancy, being too scared to reconnect with his best friends, starting up the flower shop on his own, going through this pain of losing Eijirou, and now this fucking horrible gash on his face and pain in his back— They said this would make him stronger.

But who the fuck was he fooling.

Katsuki didn’t need to be stronger. He was still just a fucking kid. All of this shit didn’t make him a better person, or a stronger man, or a smarter parent. It had only made him wish it had.

The redhead didn’t stop explaining himself, though Katsuki wasn’t sure why. He didn’t owe Katsuki an explanation. They were never truly together, they hadn’t promised each other to be anything more than a casual fling.

But he held Katsuki so tenderly, arms holding in tight to his chest like he really mattered, like maybe Katsuki really did have it all wrong.

“She wouldn’t stop calling me on my cell, at work, on our friends phones. She wouldn’t leave me alone. So I agreed to meet with her, only to tell her that—“

The man’s words came to a screeching halt but his hold didn’t loosen on Katsuki one bit, if anything he squeezed tighter. Against his better judgment Katsuki turned his head a fraction, waiting for Eijirou to continue. He was hopeless. Waiting for a reason, a valid excuse for why Eijirou had crushed his heart.

He hated that he was waiting. He hated that he wanted an excuse from Eijirou. He hated that even after all of this danger he still loved Eijirou.

Soon deep ruby eyes were turning to look into his own. They were so close, practically breathing each other's air as Eijirou pulled back to look at him.

The man took a deep breath, preparing himself from something Katsuki wasn’t sure of.

“That I /love/ you. That I want to be with /you/ Katsuki, and that she had to stop this.”

Katsuki heard himself suck in a breath before he realized he was doing it. For a moment his entire body tensed, and everything paused. For a second, he was completely frozen.

Because, yeah, he’s heard I love you before. Camie told him it after every phone call, and Deku wrote in Christmas and birthday cards. When he was younger his parents would say they loved him when he was dropped off at school.

But it’s never felt like this.

It’s never taken the breath out of his lungs and snapped every bone out of place back into its correct spot. It never sucked the rot out of his blood stream, or tore the pain from his wounds. It’s never been said to him with so much devotion in the givers eyes.

He’s never heard an ‘I love you’ that gave no room for questioning.

Until now.

Until Eijirou held his trembling frame in his arms, and took the weight of all of his baggage and held it while Katsuki felt weak. Until he looked Katsuki in the eyes, after everything Eijirou knew, after everything he’d witnessed and learned and chose to love him despite it.

Katsuki didn’t know what to say, or how to respond to it. Nobody has ever given him an I love you that he’d ever truly believed.

Eijirou must’ve noticed, because he used Katsuki’s shellshocked state as an in. He grabbed the blondes battered and bruised hands into his own, calloused, warm ones and squeezed tightly.

“I had no idea she’d do this to you, and I’m so sorry for putting you and your daughter in danger. That’s the one thing in the world I never wanted to do.”

Now that he really looked at Eijirou, the man didn’t look much better himself. His eyes held bags that rivaled katsuki’s, his hair probably hadn’t been brushed the last twenty four hours, clothes disheveled like he’d rolled out of bed, face pale, lips cracked.

Part of Katsuki hoped that maybe he looked that way because he really did feel awful about what happened, but he was quick to shoo that selfish wish out of the way. It’s not fair to push his stress onto the other man. His mess was his own, not something that should bleed into Eijirou’s life.

But the man made it hard to stop the bleeding. Every internal wound from his past was torn open by Eijirou and inspected closely, like he truly cared, like he wanted to know it all despite the mess. Every scar on his heart was peeled off and replaced with a patch of Eijirou’s soul, until they were both sharing pieces of each other and there was no telling what belonged to who anymore.

“I know what happened is unforgivable, but please let me be selfish. Please forgive me Katsuki,” Eijirou begged.

And he could see those terrible tears filling the redhead eyes once again. Just like they had the night Katsuki pushed away. Deku’s hurtful, but truthful, words clouded his brain once again, reminding him that all he ever did was hurt those around him by pushing away.

He pushed and pushed until everyone around him was hurting, until nobody wanted to put up with it. Until the people he cared about cried.

Eijirou would only ever be reduced to tears over him. That’s what Katsuki was used to, that’s what he was good at. Building walls so people couldn’t get inside and hurt him.

And he really didn’t want to hurt Eijirou anymore.

Through gritted teeth he shook his head, letting go of the metaphorical rope he’s held onto so tightly.

“It’s too hard.”

A tear rolled down Eijirou’s wonderfully tanned skin. He looked so tired. He looked like he deserved better than this.

“What do you mean?”

Katsuki’s bottom lip trembled but he bit it hard enough to bleed. As much as he loved the man in front of him, this would only be pin on both accounts. He could never give Eijirou what the other man needed. Katsuki was so fucked up, and he had a child to raise on top of his own baggage. It’s not fair to throw all of that on someone as kind, and giving as Eijirou.

He’d only ruin him.

“I have a daughter Eijirou. A whole ass kid to take care of. I can’t give you what you need.”

At that the redhead shrugged his shoulders before mumbling, “Just because somethings hard doesn’t mean it’s bad, right? Didn’t you tell me that?”

Katsuki had told the other man that, though when he’d said it he didn’t exactly imply that those rules carried over to his own world.

“It’s not the same,” the blonde shook his head.

“Why?”

Because it’s /me/, Katsuki wanted to say. Because everything that has to do with me is bad. Because Katsuki doesn’t know how to let someone be good to him, and he doesn’t know how to let someone tough out his hardships with him without being scared of what they’ll do after.

But he knew if he actually said that Eijirou would deny all of those statements.

In the silence that followed, Katsuki took a moment to wipe the snot dripping down his mouth disgustingly on the hospital gown he was in. Eijirou didn’t grimace, or say anything at all as he grabbed a box of tissues at his side and set them in Katsuki's lap.

Even the smallest gesture of giving him tissues had the blonde choking up again.

Because he really didn’t want to let go of something so good.

But he was so scared to hold on any longer.

Maybe Eijirou was telling the truth about Hana. Maybe he didn’t have feelings for her and had only been seeing her to tell her they were over.

But that didn’t mean he’d stay interested in Katsuki forever. That didn’t mean he wanted to be a part of his daughter's life for the rest of his own. That didn’t promise that Eijirou’s attention wouldn’t fall on another much more beautiful, sane person and he’d leave Katsuki and Katsumi and take their only light with him.

“All I want is for you and Katsumi to be happy,” Eijirou murmured softly.

Katsuki squeezed his eyes shut, “Don’t say that—“

“Why?”

He brought his hands up to his face a bit too forcefully, begging himself to stop fucking feeling, to stop crying and stop hoping. To just become numb again so he could move on and raise his baby without any more bumps in the road.

“Don’t say shit you don’t fucking mean—“

Eijirou grabbed his clenched hand once more, “I mean it.”

But god Katsuki wished he didn’t.

Meaning it was so much scarier than being lied to.

Believing it was so much more terrifying than feigning ignorance.

“You and Katsumi have been the greatest thing that has ever happened to me,” the redhead admitted.

And his eyes held so much honesty, so much pure intention that Katsuki could only sit there and watch in amazement over the sheer fact that someone had somehow grown to love /him/.

“I’m not trying to distract you from parenting her, or trying to steal her spotlight. I know she’s everything to you. But you’re everything to me, and I want you to be happy, Katsuki.”

Eijirou pried his fingers open to lace their hands together. His thumb ran soothing strokes along Katsuki's scuffed, shaking knuckles as he continued.

“I want to be the one that sleeps next to you every night, and watches movies with you after Sooms falls asleep. I want to kiss you, and hug you, and make love to you, and remind you of how fucking amazing you are every day.”

Katsuki felt his face heat up at the unashamed admissions.

How did this happen? How had Eijirou of all people chosen to fall in love with a loser like Katsuki?

“And I want to write I love you on the shower walls without having to question if I’m allowed to do it,” Eijirou demanded.

At that Katsuki let out a broken laugh that might’ve sounded more like crying. Eijirou took the break in the tension to press soft kissing to the back of Katsuki's hands.

He was always so gentle. Always comforting Katsuki even when his own heart was probably breaking. Katsuki was selfish for this. He was always so, so selfish in life. Always looking at how things affected him, and only him. Making decisions that hurt other people instead of letting them make their own decisions.

It’s what he’d done to Deku and Camie, when he’d ran away. He’d wanted to give them an out, to let them know they didn’t have to be friends with the weird pregnant guy from high school. But that wasn’t what they’d wanted. They’d wanted to stay and support him.

He was always making decisions for other people, without considering what they wanted.

That’s what he was doing to Eijirou too. Pushing him away without actually listening to why the other man said he wanted to.

Eijirou smiled softly when Katsuki's eyes met his, “And one day, when you and Sumi are ready, /I/ want to be a part of her life too. Whether I’m her dad, or just your boyfriend, or whatever. I want it. I want all of it.”

He swallowed thickly.

Bold claims scared him. Eijirou could say it forwards and backwards and he’d still be scared that the other man was lying. How could someone look at him and his situation and possibly want to stay? How could he look at a child that wasn’t his own and choose to raise it?

How could Eijirou possibly love Katsuki when he was nothing more than a goddam liability?

“How?” He felt himself asking, though the question probably made little sense to what Eijirou had said.

Katsuki honestly wasn’t entirely sure what he meant by it either. But like always, Eijirou knew what Katsuki was thinking just by looking at him.

“Before we met, I used to think love was something I had to fight tooth and nail for. I thought it was something I had to suffer in order to keep. But then you showed up on a random Tuesday afternoon, and you reminded me that love was easy— that loving /you/ was easy. You made me feel like I could just exist next to you.”

And he could hear the way the other man choked on his own emotions as he said each thought out sentence. He could see the way Eijirou put his heart into everything he was saying, and he could feel how heavy the weight of his words were.

Katsuki didn’t realize he’d done any of that. He hadn’t been trying to make Eijirou fall in love with him. He just wanted Eijirou to take care of himself.

“I don’t want to lose that,” Eijirou mumbled with a heartbroken smile.

Like he was terrified that he already had lost that. It was a completely ludicrous thought in katsuki’s eyes, because there hadn’t been a day in his own life since the two of them met that Katsuki hadn’t fucking loved Eijirou. It wasn’t slow, it happened fast, dangerously fast.

Katsuki had thought about how horrible it would feel to lose Eijirou before he even had the man.

Gods, losing someone like Eijirou would kill him.

It went beyond the basics of being attractive, and interesting. This wasn’t a crush. Katsuki was irrevocably, unconditionally in love with this man. Eijirou loved his daughter, he wanted to be his daughter's father, he wanted to make love to him, wanted to wake up next to him, wanted all of what life had to offer with /Katsuki/.

And he was throwing all of it away in fear of what might happen. It hardly made any sense, but it was what he’d done. His whole life he’d been running away.

But now he’s so tired of running.

Now all he wanted to do was sit here with Eijirou for a while. He wanted to soak up all his goodness, and wanted to make Eijirou believe that he deserved to simply exist. Katsuki wanted to give the redhead the love he’d never experienced himself. He wanted to be the one to turn Eijirou’s tears into smiles, and make his insecurities vanish.

He wanted to love, and be loved by someone who truly felt the same.

Even if it hurts. Even if it was some terrible mistake that left him heartbroken and miserable. He wanted to be selfish. He wanted Eijirou.

“Katsuki,” the redhead peered up at him through wet lashes, leaning a bit closer as he begged. “Please let me try. I know it’s risky, but please risk it for me.”

He let out a shaky breath of his own. It was a risk. Katsuki would risk his daughter getting attached to a man that would leave, he’d risk getting himself attached too. He’d risk the empty side of his bed feeling even more empty if Eijirou left. He’d risk his own heart all for the other man.

But it was a risk he had to take. A price he’d have to pay, or he’d never get a taste of it. He could have Eijirou. He could lose Eijirou. But maybe it was better to have had the other man and lost him than to have never had him in the first place.

Maybe it was time to stop being scared. Maybe it was time to stop running away.

And maybe that would be really hard, but he was sure if Eijirou was by his side it wouldn’t be so bad.

Katsuki wouldn’t know until he tried.

His eyes flicked up to those soft ruby eyes and he leaned forward just enough to slot their mouths together. Eijirou lips tasted like home. They felt like home too. The kiss was soft, only a slow drag of his lips across Eijirou’s own before their noses were nuzzling together, and their forehead pressed against one another.

He doesn’t know what he’s doing. This could be a terrible mistake. This could be bad, this could send his life into fucking shambles.

But if Eijirou was a mistake then he’d be katsuki’s favorite mistake he’d ever made. He’d be the one thing in Katsuki's life that he was allowed to be selfish about. And maybe he’d be wrong. Maybe Katsuki would crash and burn and everyone would end up telling him they’d told him so, and he’d once again be the fuck up they all knew he was.

He really wouldn't know unless he risked it all.

And if there was one thing Katsuki knew, it’s that Eijirou was a risk— perhaps the only risk— he’d ever be willing to take.

“I’m gonna take it,” he said through a sore throat.

Eijirou furrowed his brow in confusion.

Katsuki pressed against the other man’s forehead again, closing his eyes as he gathered up his courage.

“If you’re the risk, I’m gonna take it.”

Chapter Text

Happy endings don’t come overnight, and magical fairy tale endings aren't anything more than words on the pages of Sumi’s books.

In other words, the night at the hospital where Katsuki broke down into a million tiny pieces in the redhead’s hands and begged for him to be the one Eijirou loved most, was not the end of their story.

Honestly he wasn’t even sure if it was the true beginning of their story together.

Once Katsuki was released from the hospital, his parents took him home and stayed with him for about a week. Eijirou didn’t blame them of course. After seeing Katsuki hit rock bottom at the hospital, he wanted nothing more than to spend every waking second with him.

He could imagine the blonde's parents felt really guilty. For not noticing, for not doing things differently, for not being even half the parent Katsuki became.

Eijirou didn’t get to see him for that first week. It was almost like he was stolen away from him somehow. His back injury was serious, his brain injury was serious, the stitches on his hairline and cheek were serious too. He understood why his parents wanted to be there for him. /He/ wanted to be there for him.

But they didn’t deserve that from Katsuki. They didn’t deserve his second chances. Eijirou can’t help but feel overprotective over that. Especially after the hospital visit, and the way he had to cradle the man that deserved the world in his arms and promise him he was worth more than he believed.

Katsuki’s parents had hurt him, and it was so hard for Eijirou to let go of that after being the one to somehow hold those broken pieces back together.

He lasted about a week without seeing Katsuki and Sumi. It’s not like he was banned from the shop, but it felt strange to insert himself where he wasn’t really needed. His parents were more than capable of caring for Katsuki and Katsumi.

Eijirou couldn’t stop himself from coming anyway.

He was going to avoid the shop, knowing it was closed down for the time being, and just head straight up to the house.

But he stopped in his tracks when he heard muffled shouting coming from the shop. At first his heart was hammering in his chest, and he thought that maybe something awful was happening again.

However, once he got closer, he found that what was being said was far worse damage than what Hana had done.

“Katsuki you can’t keep holding this against us,” Mitsuki’s voice hissed. Eijirou internally cringed. He didn’t want to eves-dropping, but he couldn’t pull himself away. “We were first time parents, what else were we supposed to do?”

“So was I!” Katsuki’s voice was tired, and seemingly hoarse as he snapped back at his mother.

Eijirou felt his own throat burn. They were talking about the past, about /their/ past. The hardest thing Katsuki had opened up to him about.

“I was a parent too. It was my first time being a father too, and you sent me away! I had nobody!”

His mother cursed, and a thud resounded as Eijirou assumed she slammed her hand on the counter of the shop. He wondered if he should come in, or if he should leave. Eijirou wanted to say that none of this was his business.

But it is. Because it’s Katsuki. It’s the hurt the man carried with him every single day. The pain that made Katsuki who he was today. The horrible loss that the blonde could only talk about in the night when his heart was achy and vulnerable.

“We thought we were making the right choice,” she laughed desperately, like maybe she’d said this before and she was frustrated that Katsuki still didn’t understand.

“And how’d that work out for you?” Katsuki shouted.

Eijirou can imagine how angry his face was. In fact, he’s suffered first hand the angry face of Katsuki Bakugou. It isn’t just the usual anger, laced with annoyance about a shitty customer or. It isn’t the angry face he made when Hana was cruel to him, or the frustration Eijirou had caught glimpses of when Katsuki saw how small the tips were that day.

No, this anger stems from grief, and Eijirou knew it because he’d seen it the night the two of them fell apart. When Hana had destroyed everything and Katsuki built up his walls again.

Mitsuki’s voice was harsh. It was so unlike Eijirou’s own mothers’ soothing tones that he raised his brows in disbelief.

“Obviously not well because you still had the damn thing and here we are, dropping everything in our lives to take care of both of you!”

“Mitsuki.”

A third voice, Katsuki’s father chimed in.

Eijirou clenched his jaw. He should go. He didn’t want to hear all of this without Katsuki wanting him to. All this was doing was allowing Eijirou to see how truly broken the blonde's relationship was with his parents. All this did was make him hate the other man’s parents, when Eijirou knew Katsuki would hate, because even after everything that’s happened, even after Mitsuki just called Katsuki's daughter a ‘thing’, Katsuki still wanted a relationship with his parents.

“I want you to go.” Katsuki’s voice was raspy, and Eijirou’s heart was aching to be inside there with him.

“Katsuki, Mitsuki, let’s all just calm down,” Masaru said.

“No, you need to go.”

The blonde’s mother continued, anger laced in her tone until she sounded frantic. Like she was a broken record that she wouldn’t change because she couldn’t possibly think she could be wrong about the situation.

“You always do this Katsuki. Just keep pushing until there’s no one left for your daughter right?”

Eijirou squeezed his eyes shut, trying to ignore what was going on inside. It wasn’t his business. This was private.

“Stop acting like you know what’s best for my kid. You couldn’t even keep your own. I was suffocating in that goddamn house!”

Mitsuki’s anger was something Eijirou just couldn’t fathom hearing. He wasn’t sure how Katsuki could stand up against it. Her words held little sympathy, little love, little care for the fact that what’s done is done.

“Oh you poor thing. Poor Katsuki with a full ride to college and a bright future where you’d never have to worry about money. Poor Katsuki who’s mom and dad didn’t want him to ruin his life by getting pregnant at eighteen—“

Eijirou couldn’t stomach it anymore. Not when he’d spent the past six months in love with Katsuki, and his wonderful world, and gorgeous daughter, and perfect heart. Not when Katsuki taught him what it meant to be loved and showed him exactly how it felt to be wanted. Not when someone was talking about Katsumi like she was anything less than a wonderful gift placed in the man’s womb six years ago.

He couldn’t sit there and hear her berate Katsuki anymore. Eijirou swung the door open quickly, and immediately his eyes found katsuki’s.

The blonde was crying. It’s the first time he’d seen him since the hospital, and still his red eyes are stormy and lost, and hurting so badly.

Eijirou darted across the broken down flower shop. It seems as if they might’ve been cleaning up the mess, might’ve been getting along before this fight. But it didn’t matter anymore. They’d made the love of his life cry and feel shame for something Eijirou knew was not wrong.

He got in front of the blonde who stood painfully small behind him.

“I think you should go.”

Mitsuki gave him an incredulous, condescending look, “Oh please, you’ve hardly been a part of his life. You get no say in how we react after what he’s done to this family—“

“He had a /baby/,” Eijirou felt himself say breathlessly, exclaiming it as if it was the only way the two parents would understand.

“Katsumi isn’t a crime to this family. She’s not what caused Katsuki to go. It’s the people who call his daughter a thing and care more about how she affected their public image than how happy she made their son.”

Because that’s truly what this was. Eijirou wasn’t an idiot. He knew that the problem here wasn’t that Katsuki got pregnant at eighteen, or that he went on to have the baby, or that he was transgender and people disagreed with his overall being. The problem was his parents. The parents that were embarrassed of him and chose to leave him instead of help him. The parents whose greed took over their minds and couldn’t stand the fact that Katsuki was happy not working a back breaking office job that paid double his usual salary.

He turned back to look at Katsuki, checking to make sure he wasn’t overstepping.

But the blonde was just staring at him with wide teary eyes, too stunned to say anything at all.

Mitsuki’s eyes were full of tears too, and Eijirou almost felt bad because part of him knew that both sides of this argument were trying to fix it. But it was so hard to fix something so broken. Mitsuki and Masaru lived a life of money, and public standing. They lived in mansions and expensive cars. They raised Katsuki on horseback riding lessons and cotillion.

But Katsuki wasn’t that and neither was Sumi. They were messy paintings and art from local shops. They were going on picnics and playing in the rain, and running around the upstairs garden when the fireflies were out.

It was two different worlds that would never mend back together, and it was painful to watch it fall apart. As a mother, Mitsuki probably suffered the most. It must hurt to watch your child distance themselves, and be too stuck in your own ways to even know how to fix it.

The blonde woman stormed off upstairs, leaving Eijirou, Katsuki and Masaru in silence.

“We wanted to fix this,” Katsuki’s father sighed. He seemed dejected from it all, like maybe the pain and became so unbearable that he’d permanently made peace with this years ago.

Katsuki sighed shakily, “You can’t.”

Eijirou flinched at his lover's own words. He flinched again when the man’s father agreed.

“I know, I’ll pack our things and we will go.”

He wasn’t sure what was worse, the painful fighting words Katsuki’s mother had spewed as she desperately tried to get Katsuki to come back to her way of living, or the quiet blunt understanding Katsuki’s father had that this will never work out and Katsuki would never forgive them.

Masaru followed his wife upstairs to the house leaving Katsuki and Eijirou alone in the shattered remnants of the once beautiful flower shop.

He turned to look entirely at the smaller man, who stared up at him with big wide eyes. Katsuki looked young somehow, with bandages all over his face and eyes so hurt they seemed helpless. This was a hurt that some people never had to live through, let alone at such a young age.

Eijirou didn’t know what to say. He didn’t have anything to say. It’s not his place to speak ill of Katsuki's family. Deep down he knew that wasn’t what Katsuki wanted anyways.

So instead he just held him there. He wrapped his arms around the shaking man, squeezing tightly when he started to cry again. He swayed them quietly, and let Katsuki mourn the people who continuously walked out of his life because of who he’d become.

—

After that Katsuki’s parents stayed true to their words and left which Eijirou wasn’t sure how to feel about. Because that meant it was just Katsuki left in that house to take care of Katsumi and himself.

He started visiting more frequently after that. Eijirou would pick Katsumi up from school and join her for an afternoon snack. Sometimes after work he’d come with groceries and help Katsuki cook dinner since his arm was in a cast. Sometimes while Katsuki slept away his concussion, he hung out with Sumi and they’d play with her stuffed animals, or watch a movie, or paint their nails.

It was strange to say Eijirou slipped into their life perfectly.

Except for the fact that he and Katsuki hadn’t really talked about what this was to either of them. He didn’t know what the blonde wanted out of Eijirou. He wasn’t sure how fast was too fast and how slow was too slow.

It’s been two and a half weeks since the blonde had left the hospital and confessed that he wanted more with Eijirou.

But right now they were stuck in some sort of weird limbo between wanting more and actually getting to /be/ more to each other.

Today Katsuki was cleared for his concussion and the stitches on his forehead dissolved completely. All that was left was his broken arm and the deeper gash on his cheek that still needed some healing.

After putting Katsumi to bed, Eijirou offered to watch a movie to celebrate the fact that Katsuki could finally stare at the screen for extended periods of time again. They hardly got half way through it before they’d fallen asleep on the couch.

“Ei,” the redhead squeezed his tired eyes, growing conscious of the fact that he’d fallen asleep sitting straight up on the couch. “Ei, we fell asleep.”

When he opened his eyes, Katsuki was blinking at him with tired eyes as well.

“I’m going to bed,” the blonde announced.

“Okay,” Eijirou leaned forward a bit, wiping the sleep from his eyes before standing up as well. “I should probably go then, right?”

These past two weeks have felt odd. Not seeing Katsuki after they poured their hearts out, hanging out like awkward teenage boys, hardly even touching each other because they don’t know what’s too much or what's too little. It almost feels like they’re back where they started. Like it’s back to how they were when their feelings manifested, but they hadn’t claimed them.

It was hard to navigate.

But the last thing Eijirou wanted to do was stress Katsuki out or make him do something he wasn’t ready to do. Even though he wanted nothing more than to stay here and take are of his two favorite blondes, he knew that it was probably important to give the other man space as well.

He cared about this relationship with Katsuki. More than he’d ever cared about any other one he’d been in. So things didn’t have to move fast.

When Eijirou had stood up, he’d expected Katsuki to walk him to the front door. To say goodbye to him, or at least guide him out.

But the blonde just stood there, staring at him longingly, like there was something more he wanted to say but couldn’t.

“What’s wrong?” Eijirou asked, placing a hand on the other arm.

Katsukis arms were crossed, his healthy one holding the blue plaster of his cast as he folded in on himself awkwardly. Somehow, he looked nervous.

“I don’t,” the blonde stared but then bit his lip as he thought about it. Eijirou gave his arm another firm squeeze to show that he was here to help if he could.

“I haven’t been with anyone in six years.”

The confession came out with cherry red cheeks and an embarrassed sigh as the blonde looked off to the side.

Eijirou cocked his head to the side, obviously not expecting that to be the thing the blonde was having trouble admitting. Why was Katsuki bringing that up right now, when Eijirou was just about to head home?

“I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing,” the blonde ran a hand over his flushed face, care to avoid his stitches.

Was he being… bashful? Eijirou felt his face curl up into a grin in utter confusion. The blonde couldn’t even ask for whatever it was he wanted from the man that literally ate him out over a month again. When he huffed out a quiet laugh Katsuki shot him a glare, crossing his arms further if possible.

“I want you to stay,” the blonde’s shoulders raised in awkward defense.

His eyes held something Eijirou hadn’t quite seen before. Almost like nervousness, mixed with confusion and a slight innocence. And then it sort of hits him all at once, softly like a wave tumbling over the shore.

Katsuki’s never done /this/ before. Them. He’s never had a boyfriend, or even a hook up. He’s never let someone into his home and asked them to stay. He’s probably never trusted someone enough to let them sleep under the same roof as his beloved daughter.

This was him trying to not push. Trying to take the next step on blind footing because he wanted to be with Eijirou.

“Okay,” the redhead smiled softly. “I can stay if you want.”

“But not for sex,” Katsuki added hesitantly.

Eijirou let both of his hands slide from the blonde's shoulders to rest at the sides of his waist. He pulled the smaller man closer until he was leaning into him.

“Do you think that’s all I want from you?”

“No, just,” Katsuki shook his head before letting out a frustrated sigh. “Fuck, I’m bad at this.”

“You want me to sleepover. /Just/ sleep over,” Eijirou reiterated for the blonde, making sure he was still understanding the other man as he stumbled over his words.

He wondered if the blonde thought he didn’t want to stay the night with Katsuki, just to sleep. If anything, it only makes Eijirou’s chest flutter, and his limbs feel light. He’s never in his life had someone look at him and say they want him to stay just because. All of his partners had always been sexually motivated. The basis of his last relationship started because of a hook up that turned into more hook ups until they lived together.

So this is nice. This is /good/. This is what Eijirou assumed was what people meant when they talked about love. It was not the equal exchange of sex between two people but instead the growing chemistry between them.

Katsuki wanted him here, just to /be here/. Just to have his presence near his own.

“I-I mean, we don’t have to just sleep,” the blonde's jaw is clenched, and his lips immediately purse after speaking, like even he realizes how it sounds.

He sounds /young/ once again. Because he is. Katsuki, despite losing his parents at a young age, and becoming one at an age most people aren’t even finished with high school at. Despite owning his own shop, and taking care of a five year old every day. He’s young and he hasn’t gotten a chance to be selfish, and be in a relationship, or ask for what he needs without feeling like a nuisance.

“I’m just not ready for sex yet,” Katsuki added awkwardly.

They both share a tired laugh. After a day full of walking to and from school, preparing breakfasts and lunches and dinners, going to work, healing from injuries, playing in the garden upstairs, putting a five year old to bed and staying up to finish a movie it’s safe to say sex is the last thing on both of their minds.

“Okay,” Eijirou nods in understanding. He had already assumed that about Katsuki. All of this was new, and different for both of them.

The blonde stared at him, like he was anticipating something more, something bad, before adding, “Sorry.”

Eijirou wanted to say that no, the blonde shouldn’t be sorry for telling the other man what he needed. He wanted to remind Katsuki that he isn’t the man that Katsuki trusted in high school to keep him safe. He’s not someone from the past that would wound him and then vanish.

But some things are better left unsaid. And he was sure Katsuki knew all of those things without him having to lecture him.

Instead he leaned down to kiss the man’s soft lips. Katsuki sighed softly on impact, warm breath fanning over Eijirou’s upper lip and he leaned deeper into the kiss. He wrapped his arms around the blonde's waist, letting the other use his uninjured arm to pull himself up on his toes and hang onto the fabric of Eijirou’s hoodie.

They slowly started to walk, not once breaking this kiss. Eijirou had no idea where they were going. It was hard to think of anything other than the soft tongue grazing against his bottom lip, or the way their noses nuzzled tenderly against each other with each soft motion. The kiss was soft, delicate, tender. It was something Eijirou had never felt in his life. Something he’d spend the rest of his life craving most likely.

“My room,” Katsuki supplied as he took calculated steps backwards until they reached the door just past the living room and guest room.

He’s never been in Katsuki’s room. Very early on in their friendship, it seemed as if his bedroom was off limits, like maybe it was a safe spot for Katsuki that he didn’t usually allow others to be in. Any time Eijirou came over the man shut his bedroom door, and even now when Eijirou was visiting to check in on Katsuki, the blonde would always come out of his bedroom even when he was in pain and wanted to lay down.

He knew he should say that it’s just a room. Just an area with a bed, and some warm toned lamps. A plush white comforter, a delicate green dresser off to the side.

But it was more than that. It was Katsuki. It was his sweet warm scent on the sheets, his glasses folded neatly on the nightstand, the lotion Eijirou smelt on his skin each day accompanying it. It was the precious photos placed in the room; one of Katsuki and Katsumi when they were both unbelievably young, one of Deku and Katsuki when he was even younger, and a family photo from before Katsumi.

The back of Katsuki’s legs hit the bed and then they’re both falling to the bed. Katsuki clung to him as they leaned into the sheets, bodies tangling, lips devouring one another.

Eijirou’s hand cupped the injured side of Katsuki's face, where the wooden shelves had their hardest impact and left a large scrape against a porcelain cheek. His thumb gently grazed it, only stopping when Katsuki flinched at the touch.

“Does it hurt?” The redhead murmured.

“I’ve been through worse,” he whispered back.

Eijirou pressed a soft kiss against the skin, avoiding the spot where the stitches still remained. A piece of him still felt deep regret for partially being the reason the scar was there in the first place. He knew Katsuki would only tell him the opposite though, so he didn’t bring it up.

Instead he pressed his forehead deep into the crook of the other man’s neck. Katsuki pulled the soft blanket over them before wrapping his healthy arm around the bigger man.

“Eijirou,” the blonde said quietly. He raised his eyes to meet those beautiful scarlets.

“I love you.”

And in the quiet of the night, he smiled softly, and the tightness he hadn’t realized was in his chest disappeared.

“I love you too.”

—

Eijirou found himself staying over a lot more after that night.

It’s been three weeks, and Eijirou can count on one hand the amount of nights he’s spent at his own apartment and not at Katsuki’s place. He couldn’t stop himself. It was like his body craved a home that his brain knew wasn’t truly his. They were still new to their relationship, still in the early giddy stages of kisses and blushed, and heated make out sessions in bed late at night.

But then there were nights spent like this, when Katsuki was finishing up the kitchen after a lengthy recipe was made for dinner. Eijirou could still hear the soft clatter of the dishes through the walls of the house. He was freshly showered, hair still wet against the pillow he currently laid on. The house is cold, but currently he’s bundled under a soft pink blanket, sharing a tiny pillow with his sweet Sumi as she fights off sleep.

Never in his life did Eijirou expect to love a human being the way he loved Katsuki.

Eijirou isn’t used to it. He’s not used to coming home to two people who are excited to see him. He’s not used to being with someone who views him as an equal and not someone dated out of pity. Eijirou wasn’t used to the soft touches the blonde gave him while they cooked together, or the eager kisses he received each night.

And Eijirou sure as hell wasn’t prepared to fall in love with /Katsumi/ the way he had.

In his twenty three years of being alive, Eijirou never thought of himself as someone who was ready for children. He couldn’t even take care of himself, how could he ever be mature enough to care for another tiny life.

But somehow he did. Somehow Sumi turned into not just a part of Katsuki, but a fragment of Eijirou’s own heart. It’s only been three weeks, but as far as Eijirou was concerned, that little girl was his. She fell into place with his life in an unexpected way.

Now that Katsuki’s sprained back was healed, Eijirou was demoted from his duty of walking Katsumi to and from school, which he begrudgingly accepted even though it was one of the highlights of his day.

It just meant he had to soak up more moments like the one he was currently in.

Night took over the day, the sky turning a dark blue outside of Katsumi's window. Her room was somewhat of a sanctuary. A palace for a beautiful little girl to rest her head. A safe haven from the outside world.

Another example of what a wonderful father Katsuki had been to his daughter.

Her room was full of wonderful warm tones, and hanging plants. Tiny fairy lights danced across the walls, soft silk partially covering the window next to her bed, held off to the side by a hook so that Katsumi could peer into the garden.

The little girl's window was inside the upstairs garden, safely hidden inside the rose bushes. She could still see the wondrous plants, and beautiful fireflies that floated by every so often.

The ceiling fan hummed quietly as the two of them laid in her bed, whispering quietly to one another to ensure they wouldn’t break the invisible barrier of safety and peace.

“Eiji,” the little girl murmured through sleepy scarlet eyes. “When is the shop gonna be all better?”

She was tucked in for the night, surrounded by her favorite stuffies and warmed up by her plush pink comforter. Eijirou had just read her a bedtime story, and now got to indulge in his favorite part of the night. The time in which Katsumi was balancing between sleepiness and staying awake. Any minute she’d fall asleep, but until then, Eijirou and her would share a pillow and talk about anything that came to mind.

He ran his fingers through her wispy blonde hair. It was getting longer. Eijirou felt pride in the fact that he’s known her long enough to remember when her hair was short.

“I don’t know.”

“Is the person that broke into the shop going to break into our house too,” the little girl whispered.

“No,” Eijirou smiled sadly. No matter how many times people told him this wasn’t his fault, there was a horrible guilt that filled his chest when he heard questions like this coming from Sumi.

This must be the same guilt Katsuki had been trying so hard to stay away from his entire life.

“You’re safe here. You’ve got your dad to protect you.”

“But who will protect daddy?” The girl blinked sleepily.

“Me,” he answered honestly.

And he meant it. Maybe he was subpar at it. Maybe he wasn’t much of a protector at all, and it was actually Katsuki who protected him. But he wanted to be someone the two of them could rely on. He wanted Katsumi to trust that her father was in good hands, especially now that they were together.

Sumi hummed, eyes falling shut against her will. He twisted his finger loosely around a lock of soft blonde, twirling it into a curl and memorizing every tiny feature of his little girl's face.

“Then I’ll protect you,” she decided.

Eijirou snorted, “Oh yeah?”

She opened one eye, “Mhm! That’s how family works. I’ve got your back, and you’ve got mine.”

He couldn’t help but smile at that. It sounded like such a Katsuki thing to say.

Eijirou imagined how many nights Katsuki spent right here, telling Katsumi the same thing. He wondered how many times Katsuki had to beg for his parents to believe the same thing.

“Dad taught you that didn’t he?”

The little girl nodded before curling her body closer to Eijirou’s hand, silently requesting for a hand to run through her hair again. He wasted no time in doing so. It felt like second nature now, to care for this little girl like she was truly his own.

“Eiji, can you keep a secret?” She asked after a beat of silence.

“Always.”

She let out a big yawn, slipping further from the wonderful safe haven into sleep.

“I think daddy has a crush on you,” she mumbled.

Eijirou laughed, feeling his own face heat up a bit.

“Sooms, can you keep a secret?”

“Always,” she mimicked.

“I think I have a crush on your dad too.”

At some point he must’ve drifted off along with his daughter, because after a suspiciously long blink Eijirou felt himself being softly shaken away. The room was darker, night fully engulfing the room. The only light came from the soft string lights twisted around the frame of the bed, and the ones that dangled near the window.

“You wanna go to the bedroom?”

It was Katsuki's voice, so soft, so soothing, like honey melting down Eijirou’s bones and soothing every ache he’d ever felt. Every heart break, every insecurity, every pain in his chest or soreness in his muscles was momentarily subdued when that thick, soft voice was whispering in his ear. Just hearing that voice alone reminded Eijirou that he was something to the other person. No longer just a thing to keep around, but a person Katsuki cared deeply for.

Only he got to hear Katsuki like this. Only he got to be on the receiving end of such sweetness.

He curled into the bed with a groggy, “nuh uh.”

His forehead rested against Sumi’s soft blonde hair and she shifted just slightly in her sleep at the noise. Eijirou didn’t want to leave her. He loved her. Sometimes he wished he’d met her sooner, when she was just a little baby. But that wasn’t possible.

Eijirou could only soak up his time with her now and hope that one day both her and Katsuki would accept him into their lives, however they wished. Eijirou would do anything.

Katsuki let out a sleepy laugh before flicking off the fairy lights. He pulled the blanket up around Sumi’s shoulders and placed her stuffy under her arm. He brushed her hair back and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead as he whispered sweet words to his daughters forehead.

The blonde must’ve assumed that Eijirou had fallen back asleep too, because soon he was throwing another, larger blanket on top of Eijirou’s body and tucking him in as well. Katsuki brushed the hair from Eijirou’s face as well before softly stroking his cheek. He treated him so kindly, so gently, in a way that nobody else would ever get to see other than him.

He pressed a soft kiss against Eijirou’s lips, letting the bigger man be consumed by his drowsiness.

But not before leaning down to the redhead’s ear and whisper softly,

“Thank you, for choosing us.”

Chapter Text

It was safe to say that things were going really well. Katsuki can’t help but wonder how one person could walk into his life and quite literally change everything, even some of the most devastating ideologies that Katsuki had come to terms with about himself.

He never thought he’d be happy like he was.

Katsuki didn’t think he deserved it.

But here he was, with only a week left until his cast came off, sending his boyfriend off from their house, watching him hold his daughter's tiny hand as he walked her to school. Katsuki told him it wasn’t necessary to take Sumi to school every morning, but Eijirou insisted.

It was strange, the way he shared his daughter with the other man now. Ever since Sumi was born Katsuki had assumed he’d be doing this all on his own, and part of him thought he’d be more possessive about it. He thought he’d care more that another man was in the picture now. As if he was taking Katsuki's rightful place as father.

But it wasn’t like that, and that jealousy he expected never came. Instead, a strange sense of pride washed over Katsuki every time he saw Eijirou inserting himself into his daughter's life. Taking her to school bright and early before work, coming home in time to play in the gardens before dinner, brushing her hair and teeth after a shower, cuddling up for movies, reading bedtime stories.

Eijirou loved his daughter. He loved Katsumi like he was his own and Katsumi loved him right back.

And somehow it was as if a huge void had just been filled. Of course Katsuki was content with just Katsumi. He always knew he wanted a child of his own. Someone to protect, someone to care for, someone to love.

He just never expected to want a person like Eijirou in his life too. Love was dangerous. Love was painful. Love was something Katsuki was convinced he’d never get simply for his obscure existence.

But Eijirou was worth all the pain in the world if it meant he could spend every second with him. Even just living with him, though they never discussed permanent arrangements, felt healing. Eijirou called his home a safe haven, but Katsuki was pretty sure the safety was only introduced when the big redhead stumbled inside.

With the way everything was beginning to click into place, and the strange new feeling of change resting heavy on Katsuki's heart, he knew he had to reach out to Izuku. Years ago, when he’d given birth, he’d kept it all a secret, and it inevitably led to their fall out, which ended up putting Katsuki in the hospital.

He was tired of hiding his life from the people he cared about, and Katsuki knew it was all entirely self-inflicted. He also knew Izuku had every right to yell at him, and storm out that day. Katsuki knew he had made selfish choices that ended up hurting Izuku in the long run.

So he knew he had to make this right. He wanted to make it right again. He wanted Izuku in his life. Katsuki didn’t want to keep pushing out the few people he had that cared.

With the shop closed and absolutely nothing to do except watch his latest propagules grow, Katsuki stood from his spot on the couch with new found strength. He’d make this right today.

It’s been almost six weeks since he’s seen Izuku. The two of them had gone radio silent after their fight and the hospital visit. Both of them were in the wrong, and both of them said she they probably shouldn’t have.

But now there was Eijirou. Now Katsuki had fixed things with the person he loved. Now he’d opened himself up to someone and all he wanted to do was say ‘look Izuku! I finally figured it out. Aren’t you proud?’

The blonde swung open his door with the intent to match down to his car and drive over to Deku’s place, but found himself glued to his spot at the sight in front of him.

“Hey,” he said dumbly, unable to find the words he’d been scripting in his head for the past month.

Deku was standing at his door, seeming to be just about to knock. Had they been thinking the same thing? Or was Deku here to tell him he was done with Katsuki, and from now on the blonde would have to figure all his shit out on his own. Was he going to yell at Katsuki? Was Katsuki going to yell at him?

He didn’t know. The two of them met when they were both in diapers, yet Katsuki felt like a total stranger as he stood from Deku. Like the green haired man in front of him was the same man he’d known all his life, but somehow Katsuki was different. Somehow he’d changed and become someone unrecognizable to himself and Deku.

The freckled man seemed exhausted. His skin pale, his eyes heavy with bags, his hair tangled like maybe he’d been tossing and turning, thinking about the same thing that’s been plaguing Katsuki's mind as well.

Katsuki’s heart physically dropped at the thought. He hurt Deku in so many ways. Teasing him when they were younger, leaving when he got pregnant without a trace, pushing Deku away each time he got a little too close, each time he read the blonde a little too well.

It wasn’t fair to him. Katsuki had hurt him over and over.

“Kacchan I,” the man started to speak frantically but Katsuki stopped him before he could get a chance.

Because this time it’s different. This time Katsuki wouldn’t pretend to be annoyed when the green haired man pried his way into his life. This time he wouldn’t get upset when Deku showed concern for him. He would make the poor man beg for something that Katsuki was willing to give all along.

He let out a shaky breath, unsure where the sudden onslaught of emotion came from.

“I’m sorry.”

Deku’s eyes widened, and Katsuki could already see the confusion settling into his eyes.

“/You’re/ sorry? I’m the one who caused this, what are you apologizing for?” He motioned towards Katsuki's body.

But the pain had already left him. It’s been almost six weeks since the accident. Katsuki’s stitches from the wood slicing his skin are gone. The horrible pain in his back subsided. The concussion healed correctly and next Sunday he’d get his cast removed.

That pain had vanished, and Katsuki had forgiven the other man almost as soon as it had happened. He knew it was just a stupid fucking mistake, and it wasn’t really the blondes place to give him a hard time.

Katsuki is the one who left open wounds on Izuku for years. He’s the one who had a baby and vanished, he's the one who pushed and pushed. He’s the one who stabbed the knife right through his best friend's chest and twisted it with the anchor.

And yeah, he’s gonna go ahead and give himself some fucking grace here, because it’s difficult to have a whole ass child when your not prepared and it’s even harder when you’ve just reached the legal adult age.

But it’s time for him to fix this. It’s time to show Izuku he’s changed, and that he wanted the other man in his life.

He reaches for the green haired man’s hand, earning a look of out right bewilderment from him. It’s out of character for Katsuki, but he wants to make this stick. He can only hope that grabbing his best friends hand and squeezing it tightly can make up for all the years of giving his daughter warm baths while Katsuki closed down the shop, or making sure Katsumi finished her bottle while Katsuki showered, or when he held katsuki’s crying form and told him he was doing great and he’s be a wonderful parent.

“I should’ve asked if you wanted to be a part of Katsumi’s life instead of assuming,” he breathed out. “I should’ve never taken that away from you.”

As he spoke he watched those green irises he’d grown up with flood with tears he’d probably been holding in for five years.

“I’m sorry Izuku,” Katsuki squeezed his hand again before letting go.

The other man’s bottom lip quivered before shrugging it off, eyes flicking to the side to avoid any tears falling.

“You did what you had to do.”

Katsuki sighed before leaning against his doorframe, “Yeah, but it wasn’t fair to assume you’d be shitty like my parents were. I think after they disowned me I was scared you would do the same and I—“

He stopped himself as he truly thought about it. It’s difficult to talk about. It’s difficult to truly be honest about how he’d felt back then.

“I guess I couldn’t handle you hating me,” he squeezed his eyes shut, a rare smile gracing his features because it all sounds so silly now.

“I could never hate you. Especially not for Sooms,” Deku told him honestly.

And he knew this. Katsukis knew it since the day Deku turned up on his doorstep and begged to be let inside. He knew it when he watched Deku become the first person to ever meet his daughter, and feed his daughter. He knew it. He knows Izuku.

They’re quiet for a moment, both staring at each other with so much familiarity, with so much comfort that Katsuki can’t really help himself. He reaches his arms out just as Izuku does the same and for the first time in years the two of them are hugging. Like, actually hugging, not wrestling or arguing or suffocating the other with an arm.

“I’m sorry for what I said,” Deku mumbled into his shoulder.

“S’okay. I deserved it,” Katsuki said.

“No,” Deku shook his head and hugged him a little tighter. “You don’t deserve a lot of the stuff that’s happened.”

Katsuki felt his own breath hitch for only a moment before blowing it out. It’s nice to hear sometimes. He used to wonder what he’d done that made him so unloveable to people. He used to worry that one day Katsumi would grow up and grow to unlove him as well. He used to toss and turn at night wondering what he could’ve done to make Sumi’s biological dad stay, or make his parents love him the way they were supposed to.

But now it feels like it’s time to just let that shit go. He’s ready to move past it now. Katsuki was ready for change.

When Deku pulled back from their hug he asked, “Auntie left?”

He’d probably noticed the quietness of the house behind Katsuki.

“Yep. Not without letting me know I ruined my own life of course,” Katsuki laughed.

“Right, yeah, that sounds about right,” Deku laughed along with him, knowing Mitsuki all too well.

“But Kirishima is here,” the green haired man gave a knowing grin with a raised brow.

Katsuki pursed his lips before turning around to see what gave it away. Sure enough the man’s damn Nike shoes were strewn about the entryway.

“Mhm,” he nodded with closed eyes, trying to hide the very obvious smile growing on his lips.

But he couldn’t help it, because never in his life did he think he’d feel fond over something as stupid as shoes haphazardly placed at the front of his house.

“M’trying not to push,” he admitted, gesturing to his best friend. That’s what the whole fight was about.

Deku smiled softly, and Katsuki pretended not to preen at the way his friend looked at him with /pride/ in his eyes.

“Love you,” the green haired man teased, as if it wasn’t obvious. As if it wasn’t already a given at this point.

Katsuki rolled his eyes and beckoned the other man inside, “I know. Help me move the shitty planters downstairs.”

—

“And you're sure you're okay with this?” Katsuki asked with hands on his hips and a stressed look on his face.

Eijirou laughed tiredly as he set down one of the probably hundreds of plants Katsuki had brought over.

His cast was finally off his arm, which meant he had one full week to get shit done before the shop would reopen. While he was healing the past six weeks, he’d spent time cutting off propagules of leaves from his personal garden upstairs and the many plants he kept around his house.

Now the propagules had grown roots and could be planted, and since Katsuki was no longer rendered useless he was making sure to plant as many as possible. The quicker the propagated plants were put into soil the faster they’d grown and the faster he could propagate more and repopulate his shop. Everything had been destroyed and he’d had to start from scratch.

Both his and Dekus house was filled to the brim. The outdoor plants sat ready to grow on Katsuki's rooftop garden, and Dekus balcony while the indoor plants practically took over the whole house. He could hardly see Sumi past the growing elephant ears this morning as she left the house for school.

“Katsuki they’re plants, of course I’m okay with this,” Eijirou smiled as he placed another potted pothos on his window sill.

They hardly ever went to Eijirou’s apartment. The other man preferred sleeping over at Katsuki's place and waking up early to take his daughter to school. Katsuki wouldn’t complain, he loved to watch that relationship grow and bloom into something he’d never knew Katsumi wanted.

It also meant there was free real estate for his plants to move into the practically vacant apartment under Eijirou’s name.

“Do they look like they’re growing?” He asked as he squinted at the tiny leaves of a monstera plant.

Eijirou slipped his arms around Katsuki's waist from behind, pressing a kiss into his cheek, “You know it takes time.”

“I need the damn things to grow,” Katsuki grumbled.

He felt a little guilty, being so harsh on his plants. Usually he was a lot kinder to them.

But fuck, he was so stressed about the reopening. His shop catered to wedding venues who needed lovely bouquets, hotels that wanted fresh, beautiful plants for their lobbies and gardens, and gay people who loved plants.

He did /not/ want to disappoint his local gay people with shitty plants.

“Relax babe,” Eijirou squeezed him tighter. “The reopening isn’t for a whole week.”

Katsuki sighed. Eijirou was right. He was always right. But still, this was Katsuki's livelihood and he wanted to be successful. He wanted people to know that he would always get back up when he was knocked down, even if the only way he could show it was through fucking flowers.

“I know, it’s just all I can think about.”

But it wasn’t just that. This place held so much sentimental value. Sumi took her first steps there, and learned her first word right by the outdoor plants display. She spent most of her childhood at the shop, playing with the flowers, greeting customers who’d grown attached to her over the years, making friends with the children who came with their parents, meeting puppies who walked past the shop entrance daily.

It was her life. It was what Katsuki had given her, and he couldn’t fuck that up for his daughter.

“Focus on something else,” Eijirou whispered in his ear.

Katsuki felt his body shutter. His body was warm and an overwhelming presence against Katsuki. His hair smelt of fresh strawberries, having just showered after his morning shift at the gym. His cologne made Katsuki's knees weak.

“Like what,” Katsuki murmured, knowing all too well where this was headed.

“Me, duh,” Eijirou grinned.

That was all it took for Katsuki to turn around and rise onto his toes to meet Eijirou in a gentle kiss. They did this a lot now. Heated kisses, gentle caresses, the occasional head that had katsuki’s toes curling and throat growing hoarse from moaning.

Eijirou was always so gentle with him. Almost too gentle. Like he was afraid Katsuki would break.

“I’m not gonna break,” Katsuki tried, leaning back with a smirk.

Eijirou raised a brow, lips swollen from the kiss.

Katsuki bit his bottom lip, “It’s okay to be rough, I can handle it.”

As if pulling a secret trigger the redhead's big hands found a place on his thighs and gave them a tight squeeze and he pulled him up into his arms. Katsuki only has a millisecond to realize he’d been sat on the countertops before Eijirou’s lips found his again, this time deeper, dirtier with his tongue slipping past his lips hungrily. Katsuki moaned against his own accord, leaning into those warm lips for more, more, more.

His arms slung around Eijirou’s neck, practically lifting himself off the counter as his smaller frame reached up for him.

They’d done shit like this before. In fact in the past month and half that they’ve been on this special sweet spot of being in love, Katsuki probably made up for all the sexual experiences he’d lost after getting pregnant at eighteen.

But they hadn’t gone all the way yet. It’s one of those things Katsuki was sure he couldn’t exactly be prepared for until he was actually doing it. He shouldn’t be scared, he’s been through childbirth for god sake, but part of him is.

He’s scared that Eijirou will take one look at him and change his mind. Scared that the other man suddenly forgot that he doesn’t exactly have a dick down there, and he’s got top scars that Eijirou hadn’t seen yet.

It shouldn’t be something he’s scared of, especially when Eijirou’s hand is currently slipping down the front of his jeans and toting with the sensitive bud between his legs.

Katsuki lets out a shaky sigh when those thick fingers dip inside his slicked up hole. God no matter how many times Eijirou fingered him he’d never get used to the way the man’s hand fully engulfed his pussy.

His finger swirled around his sensitive clit, not stopping when Katsuki tried closing his legs, or when they flew back up and began shaking from the pleasure.

“You’re fucking gorgeous like this,” the redhead murmured against his lips. Katsuki panted against that pretty mouth of his, eye brows pinched as Eijirou refused to let up on his clit.

One hand held his thigh firmly as the other went back and forth between teasingly dipping his fingers inside of Katsuki's tight, wet heat and stroking his throbbing clit with slippery fingers.

Katsuki had no choice but to spread his legs and let the other man indulge. Eijirou seemed to get off on getting him off, if the face he made when Katsuki groaned and gripped the counter was any indication.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum Ei,” he moaned as the man picked up the pace, curling his fingers ever so slightly for that perfect fucking—

Eijirou stopped suddenly, and Katsuki practically cried at the loss of sensation. He was so close. His body was throbbing at the loss.

But then Eijirou pressed him down so his back was to the cold counter top, and yanked the blonde’s jeans off swiftly before leaning over and slipping his tongue inside of Katsuki's dripping cunt. Katsuki screamed at the sudden pleasure, propping himself up on his elbow while his other hand grabbed a fist full of red hair and pressed down to chase that feeling.

Eijirou was eating him out like a starving man. The lewd squelching of the other man’s thick fingers joining his tongue were hardly heard over the whines leaving Katsuki's throat each time the other man’s tongue grazed his clit.

When the pleasure became almost unbearable he tried squeezing his legs shut once again, but that same goddamn hand pulled his thigh open and—fuck Katsuki hated how turned on he was by the power imbalance at the moment— Eijirou’s lips wrapped around katsuki’s clit, sucking it messily until the blonde dropped his head back.

He came loud, with trembling legs and flushed skin against the cold countertops. Eijirou’s fingers fucked him through each wave of orgasmic pleasure and his tongue lapped up the slick pouring out of him, only stopping when the blonde began to whine at the overstimulation.

Eijirou leaned his much larger frame on top of Katsuki's, relishing the sight of Katsuki panting on his counter, half naked. He pressed a kiss to the exposed skin on Katsuki's hip softly.

Then, he lifted the blonde’s shirt just a bit to kiss that same spot he always kissed. That same scar where he’d had a c-section. Katsuki felt a lump grow in his throat at the display. How had he possibly gotten so lucky?

And would that change when Eijirou saw him? When he really truly saw him, bare and on display for only the redhead to pick apart? Would he be okay with the part of Katsuki he’d never quite been okay with himself?

“You okay? Thought you could handle this stuff?” Eijirou kissed the inside of the blonde's thigh, sucking at the skin softly.

Slowly, Katsuki sat himself up. He must’ve looked a bit apprehensive, or maybe nervous, because soon Eijirou was standing up straight. His mouth still glistened from what they’d been doing, and any other time Katsuki might laugh at his stupid Eijirou looked trying to be serious with slick all over his mouth.

But now his stomach was all jumbled, and his heart was beating out of his chest.

Because now Eijirou had given him something to lose. This feeling, one of being totally accepting and loved for exactly how he is. What if that went away? What if they had sex and Eijirou realized this wasn’t what he’d had in mind? What if Katsuki wasn't what he wanted and there was nothing he could do to change it because that's just who he /was/.

Normally this would be the time to push. This would be the time that Katsuki got off the counter and pulled on his pants hastily and fucking ran out the door without so much as a goodbye. This would be the time he told Eijirou Nevermind, told him it was too much, told him Katsuki wasn’t able to handle all of this.

Because he was really, /really/ scared of losing Eijirou.

He stared up at the other man, admiring the way his face had somehow become home. The way Katsuki remembered exactly how sharp the corner of his jaw was and exactly how the skin on his cheeks felt. The slightly darker hue of Eijirou’s eyes compared to Katsumi's, the way his bangs sometimes tumbled into his face and Katsuki would have to push them back behind his ear.

“I had top surgery,” he felt himself say suddenly, almost too sudden if he was being honest.

Eijirou let out a surprised chuckle, “I know.” And when Katsuki raised his brows at that the redhead corrected himself with a raised hand, “Well I mean I didn’t know for sure but I had a feeling.”

Katsuki nodded his head before instinctively folding his arms to cover his chest.

“So it’s gonna be different,” he told his boyfriend. “When we have sex.”

At that Eijirou’s eyes softened and the tension in his shoulders dispersed.

“Kats—“

“It’s stupid, I know—“

Eijirou cupped his face with both of his hands to stop him from rambling, “it’s not stupid.”

He nodded his head at the others response, unsure of what to say next. He tried to give a convincing smile, but Eijirou wasn’t buying it. The redhead let out a sigh before leaning in closely.

“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” he whispered quietly. “A couple scars aren’t going to change that.”

And Katsuki could only nod his head again, this time swallowing down that same lump that had been forming. He brought his hand up to squeeze the others which still sat cupping his face. Eijirou pulled him in close to press another kiss to his lips.

It could be true. The other man could be telling the whole truth. But Eijirou has only had experience with cisgender /women/. He’s been with people who were born in the right bodies to begin with, so who’s to say he won’t undress Katsuki and then feel an unintentional wave of disgust when he finally sees what—

“Hey,” Eijirou breaks off his self-deprecating spiral.

Katsuki let out an embarrassed huff at how well his boyfriend can read him at this point.

“Sorry, I’m not fucking good at this shit,” he pressed his hands into his eyes. “I just don’t want to scare you off right when we’re about to fuck because I’m not what you expected.”

Eijirou gave him a look filled with so much sadness he actually felt like pulling on his pants and leaving. He wasn't sure if the other man was pitying him, or if Katsuki had actually hurt his feelings for having such a shallow assumption about the other man.

But he couldn’t help it. He was /scared/. If Eijirou left him, it would kill him. If someone else left him again because of who he was, Katsuki might not recover as well as he did when he was eighteen.

The problem was, Katsuki was ready. He wanted to do this, he wanted to have sex with Eijirou and let the redhead into his life entirely. But If he did that and Eijirou recoiled, or ran for the fucking hills, he’s not sure he could bounce back from that.

“Sorry,” he said quickly as he watched the redhead process what he’d just said to him. He seemed to be turning a few ideas over in his head as Katsuki rambled on. “I’m just scared.”

Eijirou’s eyes met his slowly, “Show me.”

He reeled back, “What?”

“You’re scared I’ll back out if I see your top scars for the first time when we have sex right? So show me now,” the redhead explained.

And yeah, it made sense. It made perfect sense if Katsuki was being honest. But /fuck/ if that didn’t sounded ten times worse than just not showing Eijirou at all. Somehow, his top scars made him more insecure than the fact that he didn’t have a dick.

“I,” he starts and then trails off because his mind is already mentally preparing itself for the break up that’ll follow once he shrugged his shirt off.

“Only if you want to,” Eijirou added, as if the mother fucker couldn’t get any more perfect than he already was.

Katsuki was at a loss for words. All of this was new territory for him. The last time he had sex he was eighteen and he’d already come to terms with the fact that the dude he was fucking was disgusted by him. He can’t even begin to conceptualize sex with someone who loves you. He doesn’t even know how to show Eijirou his body without being uncomfortably shy and embarrassingly naive for a twenty five year old.

“I do, I just,” he looked around the kitchen, suddenly feeling insanely insecure. If someone walked in he’d die. He was already half naked, sitting on Eijirou’s counter top. What the fuck would he do once he was naked in front of Eijirou. Who the fuck did shit like that? …probably normal twenty four year olds. But Katsuki wasn’t normal. Or at least, he was made to believe that everything about him was inherently wrong.

His thoughts were once again swept out from under him when Eijirou practically swiped him off the counter. Katsuki made an embarrassing squeak at the sudden transition but wrapped his legs around the other man swiftly to keep himself from falling.

He was carrying him into Eijirou’s bedroom and before he knew it, Eijirou was sitting on the edge of his bed, with Katsuki settled in his lap. His fingers ran soothing circles against the soft fat of Katsuki's thigh, calming him, reassuring him. His heart couldn’t help but melt at the feeling.

Eijirou really did care for him. This wasn’t just a way to get into katsuki’s pants, or get a quick lay. No, Eijirou truly, truly loved him and he could feel it. The man’s hands gathered at his waist, sitting there softly, perfectly, like his hands were made to fit katsuki’s hips.

“The second you feel uncomfortable just punch me in the face,” Eijirou said softly.

Katsuki couldn’t help but laugh, which he was almost positive that Eijirou had intended to pull that reaction. Only the redhead could make him smile or laugh when he wanted nothing more than to run away and not deal with this shit.

“I’m not gonna do that,” Katsuki smiled.

“How else would I know then?”

He gave a playful slap to the redheads shoulder, “Uh, I could just fucking tell you I’m uncomfortable like a normal human being?”

Eijirou raised a knowing brow, “/would/ you?”

“Okay, maybe I will punch you in the face,” Katsuki huffed, annoyed that Eijirou could read him so well, because honestly Katsuki probably wouldn’t say anything and would push through with a bitter feeling in his chest.

“Alright, alright,” Eijirou closed his eyes and grabbed the hand pushing at his shoulder.

He pulled the blonde in for a soft kiss, pushing his body impossibly closer until there was little room for Katsuki to whip his shirt off. Fuck, is that what he’s supposed to do? Is he supposed to throw his shirt off all at once for the redhead to see him like a poorly sculpted art project?

His body was stiff through the kiss, and Eijirou surely noticed because just as slowly as he had kissed the blonde, he started to trail down Katsuki's jaw and to the soft skin of his neck. It sent goosebumps down the blonde's spine and against his better judgment he ground down into Eijirou’s lap.

The redhead's eyes were half lidded when he pulled back. It's enough to look up at Katsuki and ask, “Can I help?”

He nodded his head before he could think any better of it. Honestly, Katsuki was absolutely lost. He’s never done anything like this before. He’s never wanted to do anything like this at all. It was scary, and usually when Katsuki felt like that he would run away.

Eijirou’s hands were careful as they unbuttoned his short sleeved button down. His lips found the crook of Katsuki's neck once again, breathing hot against his skin, lips feather light, just barely sucking the tender skin there.

When there were only two buttons left to undo, the shirt fell from his shoulders and on instinct Katsuki curled in on himself. Eijirou pulled back, eyes not once leaving Katsuki's.

“Do you want to stop?”

He was bare. He was out in the open, on full display and that was fucking terrifying. But Eijirou was holding him so softly, so closely, like he was water in the other man’s hand.

“No,” he whispered.

Because he didn’t, because he wanted this, because he was ready to be happy with Eijirou, with Katsumi, with himself. He can’t feel it yet, but he was so fucking ready. He just had to trust that what Eijirou said was true. That he did love him, that he already accepted him for what he was, that there was no possibility of the other man leaving.

He felt the redhead's hands undo the final buttons of his shirt and then it was off.

And Eijirou was staring at him intently. Katsuki couldn’t help but watch him look. He felt like his nerves were actually buzzing, like his heart might fucking explode from how hard it was beating in his chest.

His thick fingers slid from their spot as his waist to his chest. Those calloused hands gently stroked past each scar, each messy looping line seeming to sooth with each touch. Patient with those jagged grooves, of the relics Katsuki can’t remove, of the deepest most intimate parts of himself that nobody, not a single soul had ever seen before.

Not his parents after the surgery, not Deku when they went to the community pool on weekends, not Katsumi when she was just a newborn and needed to rest on her fathers chest as he gave her first bath. Nobody, not a single soul had ever touched him like this. Nobody had ever looked at him and said they wanted more.

He sat and waited, in the gentle hood of the other man’s lap. Katsuki waited for the disgust to take place on his face. He waited for Eijirou to shake his head and apologize. Waited for him to say he actually couldn’t do this with him.

But it never came. Not once. Not when his fingers brushed against the healed scars, not when Eijirou leaned down to press a kiss against his collarbone and then lower, and lower, and lower. He nipped and sucked at the skin there, only stopping when he could see it grow red and probably leave a hickey later.

And then he looked up at Katsuki with those gorgeous ruby red eyes. His face was flushed, lips still wet from kissing, a smile on his face as he spoke.

“Katsuki you’re out of your goddamn mind if you actually believe you aren’t the sexiest man alive.”

He couldn’t stop the stuttering breath that left his lips as he rushed out the words, “I don’t believe you.”

It was a practiced response, one he couldn’t quite shake yet. He wanted to believe Eijirou but he didn’t. How could he when his whole life he was made to feel as if he was made incorrectly and deserved to feel ashamed.

In seconds he was spun around the lay flat on his back, against the plush comforter of Eijirou’s bed. He propped himself up on his elbows and watched as the redhead trailed kisses all the way down his neck, his chest, the scar left from katsumi, until his hot breath was all over katsuki’s already leaking cunt.

“Then I’m gonna have to make you believe me,” Eijirou murmured, before slipping his tongue inside of Katsuki for the second time.

—

The evening air blew briskly into the house, slightly causing the curtains to curl and curve into the living room where Katsuki and his daughter sat. The tv played softly in the background, some show about a girl who gets a magical, angry cat that looks somewhat like a dog keeping Katsuki more entertained than Sumi.

She was currently working on a project for school. An about me poster to put around the classroom, hopefully to ‘cultivate an inclusive diverse classroom’ her teacher has said in the letter sent home requesting parents help. They needed pictures of Katsumi's family, which led to him digging through the closet to find as many pictures as he could from the past five years.

The front door clicked open, and Katsuki didn’t have to guess who it was coming inside. Eijirou’s arms were wrapped around him soon after, and a kiss was pressed to his cheek.

“Brought some friends, hope that’s okay,” he smiled. He smelt like soap from the gym, and the cologne that always sent Katsuki's mind to dirty places.

“Uncle Denki! Uncle Sero! Aunt Meens!” Sumi cheered, dropping her glue stick and running to the three of them.

“Hi Sumi Sooms,” Mina scooped her into a hug and drowned her in kisses.

Katsuki couldn’t help but smile at that. There were people who wanted Katsumi in their lives. Sero and Denki came in with arms full of plants they’d been taking care of for the blonde while he was healing. They didn’t kill them, surprisingly, and they grew wonderfully.

“What’s this?” Eijirou sat on the couch, pointing at the purple poster paper that was covered with more glitter glue than actual pictures.

Katsuki and Sumi got a little carried away decorating.

“Kindergarten homework,” Katsuki explained and he moved closer to his boyfriend. Making room for his friends to join them on the couch as well. “It’s an ‘about me poster’ to build classroom culture I guess.”

Sumi stole Eijirou’s attention, tugging at his hand to show him her choices.

“Here’s grandma and grandpa, and daddy, and uncle Deku and aunt Camie,” she pulled each picture she planned to use out of the stack of supplies they were using and Eijirou listened intently as she explained.

“Get the rubric out of your backpack,” he shooed his daughter away when his boyfriend was covered in the photos.

Sumi whined, “The teacher said we don’t /have/ to follow it.”

“I want a good grade, go get it,” Katsuki waved off to his daughter's bedroom.

His friends had taken to look at all of the other photos strewn about the couch and coffee table, and Katsuki had to pretend he wasn’t insanely nervous for them to see what the past five years of his life looked like. In Katsumi's eyes it was a happy time, being alive with her father in the shop and in their house. But Katsuki had been going through probably the worst depression of his life for the first two years of Sumi's life and it’s so obvious from the pictures he’d taken during that time.

“Oh my god, some of these are insane. She’s so young here,” Mina cheered when she held up a photo of Katsuki holding his daughter.

That photo was taken by Camie, when they’d finally reconnected. It’s one of the first photos Katsuki had that wasn’t just self taken, and he truly cherished it. Sumi was about one and a half, hair still a puffy mess that was too short to do anything with. He still remembers dressing her that day, and he still remembered feeling like such a failure of a father despite the giant smile plastered on Katsumi’s face.

Because he truly did isolate them both for so long, and Katsuki subconsciously knew that ever since the day she was born. It haunted him. You could see it in each picture.

“Yeah, she’s like a day old there,” Kaminari cooed as he picked up another photo.

It was a hospital photo this time. The only one he had because while he was being handed a fucking baby and realizing for the rest of his life he’d be a father, one of the nurses knew he’d want this moment captured one day. She’d taken his phone and snapped a few candids, which Katsuki had been eternally grateful for.

“What landed you in the hospital that close to her being born? Did you miss the birth?” Sero asked in confusion as he too looked at the picture.

He’s eighteen, and you can tell. The baby fat is still evident on his own face, as well as the little baby he’d literally just birthed. You can see the fear in his eyes, but also a sense of proud fondness in the smile on his face. Katsuki remembered that like it was yesterday.

When he was so fucking alone, so goddamn empty inside. The hospital room had a singular nurse there to help him when his newborn cried, since his parents had disowned him and he’d moved three hours away from his best friends.

Looking at that photo made his heart ache for the boy there. So young, still figuring out life and being handed a baby girl that would change everything. And he was doing it all alone.

Eijirou saw the inner turmoil on Katsuki's face and gave his thigh a soft squeeze.

That’s right. He’s not alone anymore. Even now when he’s looking at this photo, he’s reminded that he’s an entirely different person now. He has /people/ now. People who love him enough to stowaway plants in their apartments until they're up to their ears in green. People who come over to his home and kiss his daughter on the cheek because they’re so happy to see her. People who look at him and know that he’s not wrong, that he’s not dirty, or disgusting.

He’s not who he used to be.

Because to be loved is to be changed. To be loved is to grow and learn and love back just as much.

He looked over at the three of them. The three people Eijirou introduced him to almost a year ago. The three people who helped him through so much without even realizing it. Katsuki trusted them. He really really did.

And he knew that if he wanted them to be a part of katsumi’s life they deserved to be a part of katsuki’s too.

“Im trans so,” he told them carefully, clutching the bottle of glitter glue in his hands.

In some ways it was like a giant hammer was slamming into his chest. But more than that, there was a sense of weight being lifted from his shoulders. Like his soul was finally able to rest in the safety of those around him.

“Kinda fuckin needed me there for the whole child birthing thing.”

Eijirou squeezed his thigh tighter, as if to remind him that it was okay. That Eijirou was here and he wouldn’t be going anywhere. Perhaps Eijirou knew how his friends would react and that’s why he didn’t feel the need to say anything at all.

“Well you just get cooler and cooler,” Kaminari raised his brows in obvious shock.

But there was nothing malicious there. There wasn’t any resentment, and they didn’t look at him any different at all.

They’d accepted him entirely.

“Seriously,” Mina nodded as she picked up another picture. As if Katsuki admitting this wasn’t the crime he’d been taught to believe it was.

Sero, the observant friend of their group, smiled at Katsuki as he said, “Thank you for telling us.”

“Why?” Katsuki asked in genuine confusion.

“Well, because that’s something really personal. You trust us with that information, so I’m thanking you,” Sero said genuinely.

And Katsuki sat there for a moment in genuine shock. His friends gave him a look of similar confusion too, slowly piecing together just how important this moment truly was for katsuki. He didn’t open up much to them. They didn’t know half of what he’d been through.

Yet they still treated him so kindly.

“Mhm,” he nodded his head, afraid of what he’d do if he started to speak, because he just might cry honestly. Words can’t describe the relief he’d just felt from those few simple words.

After a beat of knowing silence, tiny footsteps came running back in, and Katsuki blinked away the emotion from his eyes, and readied his glitter glue instead.

—

The day of the grand opening started as any other Saturday started, and somehow it served as a sort of introduction to Katsuki's new life that was only just beginning.

He rolled out of bed like he’d done every morning, only this time he had to untangle himself from strong arms and a muscular chest. He started on breakfast, only now instead of making one adult serving and one child size serving, he was making two adult servings and one child sized serving. This time, when breakfast was ready he didn’t have to pause everything to wake up his daughter and get her ready for the day, because Eijirou had already stirred her away and taken her to brush her teeth and pull her hair back into his favorite style of fluffy pigtails.

And when breakfast was done and he got ready for work downstairs, he wasn’t met with a horribly deafening silence, but rather a slew of compliments about just how wonderfully beautiful he was. Somehow, Katsuki was truly starting to believe it too.

The shop looked somewhat the same, though Katsuki and Deku made some changes that should’ve been done long ago.

They’d finally hung the string lights Katsuki had kept in the closet for a good year, and they recruited Eijirou’s help in hanging some plants from the ceiling. The shelf that had broken bones was obviously removed and a new one took its place, reassuringly screwed into the wall maniacally by Deku.

By the time the open sign was turned on, a flood of people had entered. Some were familiar, some were brand new. People had been waiting for his store to open back up, much to Katsuki's surprise. By lunch his sales had skyrocketed. It was almost too good to be true, the way that almost everything fell back into place. Eijirou and Sero took some time off work to visit and see how things were going. Todoroki came by during his lunch in his scrubs, offering both Deku, Katsuki and Sumi a fresh sandwich from the shop a few doors down. Mina and Camie purchased new plants for their apartments, and Denki hung around almost the entire day to make sure Katsumi was safe.

It was strange to be supported this way.

By the end of the day, they were up in sales. Deku counted the till as their friends chatted about the shop. Eijirou walked behind Katsuki to hug him tightly with one of his free arms. It was something that became a new normal. Something Katsuki never knew he missed until he didn’t have it all day long.

He raised a brow at the other arm Eijirou had hidden behind his back.

“I have something for you,” he smiled.

Katsuki gave him a scolding glance, “You didn’t have to get me anything you’ve helped enough.”

“Yeah, but the squad and I really wanted to give this to you. Honestly I should’ve given it to you a long time ago,” Eijirou murmured softly, keeping his voice low enough that only the two of them could hear.

When he pulled the hidden hand out from behind his back, a familiar plastic container was placed on Katsuki’s hands.

The college fund.

The container Katsuki had sat on the counter every day, hoping to get some sort of tip for Sumi to one day be sent off to college.

Eijirou had found it and returned it. Not only was it back in his hands, but it was filled with more money than he’d remembered it having. There were still a bunch of coins and scrunched up bills. But then there was more. A lot more. Bigger bills and extra coins.

“We donated a little bit to the funds as well,” the redhead added with a smile.

“Thank you,” Katsuki breathed out. He felt his throat start to sting and his hands begin to tremble.

There wasn’t nearly enough to put Sumi through college or anything. Maybe pay for the first semester of her classes her freshman year. But it wasn’t about that. It was the fact that Eijirou even had the college fund jar in the first place. It was the fact that the other man knew how important it was to Katsuki, and wanted to return it safely to him.

Eijirou shrugged it off, “It’s nothing. It shouldn’t have been stolen in the first place I—“

Katsuki set the college fund to the side and pulled the man down into a deep kiss. Eijirou stumbled forwards a bit at the spontaneity, but then leaned in deeper as well. Katsuki could already feel the tears that trickled down his face. He was so full of gratitude. For this, for the life Eijirou helped him create, for the love Eijirou had for his daughter and the love Eijirou helped Katsuki instill in himself.

He pulled back, just enough for the other man to look him in the eyes, “Thank you Eijirou. Thank you so much for everything.”

A tiny gasp was heard a few feet away, and soon Katsumi was running up to them in concern.

“Daddy’s crying! Daddy, why're you crying?!”

Eijirou pulled Katsuki into a hug, hiding his tears in the crook of his neck and shielding his eyes from the little girl.

“Tears of joy Sumi Sooms! The shop is back open!” Eijirou cheered.

Katsuki couldn’t help but laugh.

It was so much more than that.

—

As time went on, the seasons changed, the weather changed, the shop grew.

Katsuki changed. Eijirou changed.

Katsuki was more open about things. When things were difficult he’d speak on them. He was honest about how he felt about sex. How sex was something that scared him because of how it took his life and flipped it upside down. How there was still a bit of trauma around intercourse that had absolutely nothing to do with Eijirou and everything to do with the fear of getting pregnant again and not being prepared for that. Eijirou understood. Of course he always understood, and waited for Katsuki to be ready. There was no rush on it. No demand. He wanted Katsuki to have sex with him when they were ready, and was fine with all of the other things they did besides penetrative sex.

About a year into their relationship they finally did have sex. It was everything a movie couldn’t capture. It was gentle and tender. There were tears from both parties, and praise on both ends. It was as if everything was finally snapping together, like the two of them were truly linked together for good now. They were connected, souls intertwined, hearts melted into one.

Eijirou had become a dad.

As months dragged on, the lease to his apartment he’d been renting had ended and Eijirou decided not to renew it. He’d already been living with Katsuki anyways, and the blonde had excitedly agreed to moving in together. Somewhere in those days of living together, sleeping together, waking up together and eating together, Eijirou had become a father to Katsumi.

It wasn’t really discussed. They didn’t demand that Sumi start calling him her father because they lived together and that's how these things went. There was no pressure on Katsumi at all.

She’d decided it for herself.

No monumental moment, or grand decision announced to the general public. She just started calling him dad. Casually, like it rolled off her tongue just as it did for Katsuki. He was her other father. He was now a piece of her life that would never be taken away. Eijirou would be lying if he said he didn’t tear up the first time she called him her father in front of their friends.

Their friends came over once a week for dinner, Camie and Mina got together, Deku got married to his girlfriend, Todoroki graduated grad school and became a doctor.

But Katsuki truly won the greatest gift of all in the end.

Katsuki Bakugou found his happiness again in the form of Eijirou Kirishima and Katsumi.

Sorry—

Katsuki /Kirishima/, found his happiness again in the form of Eijirou and Katsumi Kirishima.