Archive of Our Own ^beta

Zim glanced down at Dib, who was sleeping on  his chest. He gently nudged him. Dib let out a “hm?”. “Hey there sleepy. I just wanted you to know that I’m about to leave.” Zim said, “Okay. Stay safe out there!” Dib replied, gently nuzzling Zim’s neck, letting out siren chirping noises despite not being in siren form.

“Alright. Bye, my Fishboy.” Zim smiled, intertwining its antennae with Dib’s scythe.

“Bye Spaceboy. Don’t do anything illegal. And make sure Gir doesn’t do stupid shit.” Dib advised, then giving it a kiss.

“Don’t worry, Dib-fish. I’ll make sure to not blow up people’s houses!!” Zim assured, then crawling out of bed and getting ready to leave the house. 

•••

Zim was on his way back home from getting some of his snacks. Gir munched on some chips, specifically those weird ones it liked. 

“Want one master?” It asked, offering one of the chips to Zim. “No Gir. I’m good.” Zim insisted, “Come on Master! Please??” Gir begged, “No.” Zim said before the voot’s computer began blaring a “crash landing” warning.

Zim and Gir let out screams as they fell onto the rocky surface, the voot soon it the ground with a bang.

“What the hell Gir?!” Zim snapped as he stepped out of the voot, angrily glancing at his sir unit. “Sorry Master…” Gir apologized with a frown.

Zim kicked at a spot on the rocky ground, wishing it wasn’t tangled up in this mess.

“Nothing but a dirty, revolting and rocky planet.” Zim commented with a grumble as Gir wandered off.

Zim stood there for a moment, until it heard Gir shout for it. “Master!!” Gir shouted, “What?!” Zim questioned in annoyed tone. “Look!!” Gir said, dragging xem by the hand.

“What is this?!” Zim gasped at the sight, beautiful floral vegetation?!

Vines, flowers, trees and greenery?!

Beautiful flowers,vines, and greenery surrounded xem.

“Maybe this place isn’t that bad.” Xe remarked, soon noticing a pond of greenish-yellow liquid right in front of xem. Zim glanced down at it, then spitting into it out of boredom.

Soon, the pond began to bubble. Zim glanced down at it in confusion, raising his eyebrow. “Huh?” He remarked, until something strange emerged from the pond.

Zim gasped, an Irken smeet???

“Papa!” The smeet smiled, “Pinch me Gir.” Zim demanded, turning to face Gir. Gir pinched him, Zim let out a yelp.

I’m a papa now?? Zim thought out of disbelief.

“Thank irk I’m NOT in rest mode.” Zim remarked, then noticing a swarm of single celled aliens rise from the strange liquid.

Zim grasped its smeet, “No one harms the offspring of Zim!! NO ONE.” Zim proclaimed, snatching its newly created smeet from the blob of single celled aliens.

“Welp. I guess I’m a parent now.” Zim said as xe held the small smeet in his hands.

“Papa!” The smeet squeaked, Zim couldn’t help but smile. 

The smeet let out babbles as the two headed back to the voot, “IMA BIG BROTHA NOW!!!” Gir smiled, holding the smeet, then attempting to eat them.

“DO NOT EAT THEM GIR!” Zim shouted, snatching xyr smeet away from xyr robot as the two climbed back inside.

Zim wrapped his smeet in Dib’s hoodie, allowing them curl up on his lap and fall asleep .

•••

Dib jolted up from his sleep, being awoken by the sound of someone knocking on his door.

He groggily sat up, “Who is it?” He asked lethargically. “It’s just me, son.” Professor Membrane said.

“Come in.” Dib grumbled, then taking a sip from the glass of water bedside their bed. 

Professor Membrane walked inside, “I just came in here to tell you that Skool’s closed down for renovations. It won’t be back open until next semester. Early summer break for you!” Professor said.

Dib spat out  their water, “Wow. That’s crazy.” They remarked. Professor Membrane nodded in agreement.

“Anyway, me and Clembrane have got to go get ready for that important business trip-“ Professor Membrane said, then leaving the room.

“Wow.. early summer break…” Dib remarked, shocked.

•••

Zim made it back to Earth, landing the voot inside the rooftop before hopping off the roof and onto the walkway. 

Zim kicked down the front door, waking up Dib, who had been mumbling about ghosts in his sleep. While in siren form.

Dib had went for a swim earlier, and somehow managed to get back home.

Dib was dazed and confused at first, putting on his glasses.

“YOU’RE A FATHER NOW DIIIIB!!!” Zim proclaimed, placing the smeet beside them. “WHAT-“ Dib replied, “How the fuck did we have a baby?! We’ve never- you know! And- “ Dib tried to say before they were interrupted by Zim.

“Zim didn’t “have” the smeet.” Zim clarified, “Then. Whose child did you steal?!” Dib asked.

“Zim stole no smeet!” Zim began, “I created them out of my dna. By accident. After spitting into some weird pond.” Zim finished. 

“Oh. I was a bit worried there for a moment.” Dib mumbled, then picking up the smeet.

“Do they have a name?” Dib asked, “Yes! It is Zim! Zim jr!” Zim smiled, “Zim. There’s no way I’m calling the baby that… how about something different. Like Seven! We could call them Sev for short.” Dib proposed.

Zim stood there, gathering his thoughts.

“You know.. that is actually a nice name. Their name is Seven now!” Zim smiled, then taking a seat on the couch beside Dib. 

Dib placed Seven on the sofa.

“That’s your Dad. He’s stinky.” Zim purred, “Dada!” Seven babbled, crawling towards Dib. Dib couldn’t help but feel their heart melt at the sight, picking the smeet up and placing them on their chest and letting out purrs.

Dib gently stroked them as he held them in his arms, Zim flattened his antennae, his spooch melting at the sight.

Skoodge was in the basement, working on a lego set. He was adding some small pieces until he heard Zim and Dib shouting upstairs. “Huh?” He questioned, going upstairs to see what all the commotion was about. 

Skoodge rushed upstairs, only to see Dib cuddling a irken smeet to their chest, gently kissing the top of its head and Zim smiling at them. 

Zim noticed Skoodge before Skoodge could say anything. “Hi Skoodge!!! You’re an uncle now!!” Zim smiled, “Where did you get the smeet from?” Skoodge asked, “I accidentally made them out of my dna when I was exploring this nearby planet.” Zim explained.

“Aw. Such a cute little guy.” Skoodge smiled, “May I hold them?” He asked, “Sure.” Dib said, handing Seven to Skoodge.

“Uncle Skoodgey!” Seven squeaked, “Yes!” Skoodge smiled, hugging the smeet. 

“We should probably make a disguise for them.” Zim suggested, Dib and Skoodge nodded in agreement. “I KNOW!!!!” Gir smiled, whipping out a scene wig from out of nowhere.

Zim examined it, “Yeah this should work.” Zim confirmed, Skoodge handed Seven to Zim.

“Hold still now.” Zim said, putting the black and blue scene wig on Seven. 

“Aw. Such a fashionable smeet!” Skoodge remarked, “Yep. Just like Zim.” Dib smiled.

“How about we go show the Dib-sister and Tak-smell, eh?” Zim said, “Sounds good. As soon as I get dry.” Dib grumbled.

•••

Zim, Skoodge and Dib walked out of Zim’s base, and made their way to the Membrane house.

Zim held Seven in his arms, Dib, Gir and Skoodge followed. 

Gaz, and Tak sat on the couch, Professor Membrane stood in the kitchen.

Zim opened the front door, “Hello Earth stinky’s!! Me and the Dib have someone we’d like you to meet!” Zim proclaimed, Dib standing by him with a smile.

Zim held up Seven Lion King style, “Everyone, meet me and Dib’s smeet, Seven. Or otherwise, Sev!” Zim announced as Sev let out a squeak. Professor Membrane spat out his coffee.

“YOU GUYS-“ He shouted before being interrupted by Dib, “Dad. It’s fine. Zim created Seven out of his dna by accident. We don’t do that kind of stuff. We know not too. I don’t even think Zim knows about that stuff if I’m being honest.” Dib interjected. 

“Oh- thank god.” Professor Membrane sighed of relief, “Wow. I never thought Zim and Dib of all people would ever become parents.” Tak remarked, Dib snatched Seven from Zim’s hands, showing them to Gaz and Tak.

Gaz’s expression softened at the sight of the smeet, “Uh- hi I’m your aunt Gaz. And that’s your aunt Tak.” She said, trying to hide her softness, carefully taking the smeet out of Dib’s hands.

Seven let out a purr as Gaz scratched their chin, the two had to stop themselves from letting out an “aw”.

“I think they like you, Gaz.” Tak commented, “I think they do too.” Gaz agreed, handing Seven back to Dib.

“No teaching them swear words, ‘Kay?” Dib directed, giving Gaz a death stare, “‘Kay.” Gaz replied.

Professor Membrane glanced at Zim and Dib. “You understand that children are a big responsibility, right?” He said, Zim and Dib nodded in agreement.

“Yeah. We know.” Dib replied, “If you need help, feel free to call me.” Professor Membrane said, “Thanks Dad.” Dib replied.

“May I hold them?” Professor Membrane asked, “Sure.” Dib answered with a smile, handing Seven to Professor Membrane.

“Grandad!” Seven squeaked, “Yes.” Professor Membrane smiled, petting Seven’s head.

Clembrane then came zooming into the room

“What’s goin’ on in here?” He asked, Dib glanced at him, “Hey Dad. You’re a grandpa now.” Dib smiled, Professor Membrane then handing Seven to Clembrane.

“You’re just a cute baby.” He cooed, tickling Seven’s stomach, then handing them back to Dib.

“Well anyway, I’ve got to get going. See you! No partying!” Professor Membrane declared, taking his bags, Clembrane following him.

“Welp. What should we do now?” Zim asked, turning to face the others.

“Let’s go find Keef and Tenn.” Skoodge suggested, “And get Sev something to wear so they aren’t walking around naked.” Dib adds, glancing at Seven who playfully biting his fingers.

“I think I have something that Seven can wear.” Dib smiled, taking Seven upstairs to his room. 

Dib placed Seven on their bed, grabbing a shirt from their closet. “This was mine, but now, I want you to have it.” Dib smiled, handing Seven their old frowning face shirt.

Dib carefully put on the shirt, “There.” He smiled, holding Seven up in the air. Dib then grabbed something else, one of his old baby blankets, it had different kinds of moths on it. “And this too.” He purred, wrapping Seven in the blanket before taking them back downstairs.

Dib held a bundled up Seven in his arms as he walked downstairs, “Now we can go.” Dib said, “Alright then.” Zim replied, the group heading out the door.

Dib had Seven glued to his chest, “Wow. They’re adjusting to being a parent quite nicely.” Tak remarked, “Yeah. I guess they learned how to care for children when we used to play with dolls.” Gaz figured.

“I remember that  I basically had to beg him to play with me.” Gaz recalled, memories soon rushing back.

“Please play with me!!” 

“No. Go play on your own.”

“Pleeease big brother??”

“Ugg. Fine.” 

“Wow.” Was all Tak said. 

Soon, the group arrived at the local ice cream shop. “Oh! Hi guys!” Tenn greeted, noticing the rest of the group, Keef just waved. 

“Hi Tenn.” Zim greeted, sitting down at the table, Dib still having Seven close to their chest. 

Tenn couldn’t believe her eyes, “Is that a smeet?” It asked, purr’s eyes widening in curiosity. 

“Mhm.” Dib smiled softly, pulling Seven away from his chest and showing them to Tenn.

Keef and Tenn started gushing, “Where did you eat them from?” Keef asked, “Zim stole them.” Tak joked, “No i didn’t!” Zim snapped, “I created them out of my dna at some weird pond on this weird planet.” Zim explained.

“Wow!” Keef gasped, Zim nodded in agreement, soon getting up to order some ice cream.

Zim soon came back with some ice cream, placing it on the table. Seven’s eyes widened cutely. “I got this one for them.” Zim smiled, Dib then grabbed the spoon and started to feed Seven. 

Seven started munching on the strawberries, savoring the flavor. “Oh god.” Dib remarked, “Hopefully you don’t get unhealthy obsession with strawberries.” He said. 

“Hey!” Zim scoffed, pretending to be offended.

The group then started chitchatting about random things, meanwhile Dib still held Seven close, letting out little purrs.

“You know. We should get Dib a baby carrier or something like that.” Keef said, “Yeah!” Skoodge agreed.

“I think I have one I used to use for my dolls somewhere.” Gaz chimed in. “Nah. I’ll just make one myself. With a blanket.” Dib said.

“I’m surprised at how quickly you adjusted to being a Dad.” Tak commented, “Me too. But then again, I’ve always kind of liked the idea of being a parent. Like adopting a kid. Not carrying a child. That makes me extremely uncomfortable.” Dib replied, nearly vomiting at the sheer thought of that. 

“What should we do after this? I mean skool’s out so we don’t have to worry about that.” Tenn asked, “Maybe go on a chaotic road trip.” Zim joked.

“You know, that does sound kind of nice actually. Just all of us on some crazy road trip.” Tenn replied. “Well then, how about we do it? It’s not like my Dad’s home. And Keef’s family is still on that business trip.” Dib proposed.

“Yeah!!” Keef chimed in.

The group got up from their seats, leaving the ice cream shop and heading to their homes and bases to pack.

•••

Zim sat on Dib’s bed as he watched them pack, Dib was throwing a bunch of things into their suitcase as Zim held Seven.

“Dib. Why are you packing so much??” Zim asked, “I just like being prepared. Plus I’ve got to make sure Seven has plenty of things.” Dib answered. 

Zim got a message for everyone in the group chat, telling it that they were ready to go. 

“Hurry up Dib-thing!” Zim nagged, “Alright! I’m done.” Dib replied, zipping up their suitcase.

Soon, Dib and Zim headed out the door, Seven cuddled up against Zim.

Off we go! 

Zim climbed into the front seat of the voot, Dib had Seven held close to his chest, he also carried a bag for Seven as well. 

“I’m driving Dibby.” Zim proclaimed, “Don’t drive like manic like you did the other day. Like no speeding down that highway and shit. Pay attention to speed limits and traffic lights.” Dib advised.

“It’s fine. I know what I’m doing. I was only doing that stuff because we had to get away, and quick.” Zim insisted.

Zim had made a chair for Dib out of a lawn chair, blankets and pillows.

“Sorry that it’s kind of bad- I should really figure out how to add another seat in here. I hope this is fine though.” Zim said.

“It’ll work.” Dib replied with a smile.

Zim inserted his Millionaires cd, skipping to his favorite track on the album, Take Your Shirt Off.

Zim began to drive as its Millionaire’s cd blasted through the voot as Seven danced along to Take Your Shirt Off and Zim horribly sang along to the lyrics. 

“Take Your Shirt Off!!! And spin it around!!!” Zim sang horribly as it  drove, Dib then yanked his shirt off. Zim glanced at him in confusion. “Why did you take your shirt off?” It asked, “Because you were singing that song.” Dib replied, cuddling a now tired Seven close. 

Dib placed their coat on top of Seven like a blanket, Dib then stretched out and reclined 

their chair, getting ready to take a nice nap.

“You going to bed, Fishboy?” Zim asked with a smile, “Yeah. I’m tired.” Dib replied, then pulling the blanket over themself and cuddling Seven tight.

“Alright then, good night, Dib-love.” Zim purred affectionately, leaning over to give Dib a kiss, Dib returned the favor. He then fell asleep in a matter of minutes.

••• 

Gaz and Tak sat in the voot trailer, “I can’t believe Zim and Dib actually have a baby.” Gaz remarked as she sipped her grape juice, Tak nodded in agreement. “Me neither. Hopefully they’ll be okay- Smeets are a very large responsibility.” Tak commented.

“I think they’ll be fine though. I mean. It looks like Dib’s already taken his role as a parent very seriously.” Tak assured, “Yeah. But what about Zim?? Not sure if he’s the kind of person I’d leave a baby with.” Gaz questioned. “I think it might be fine. As long as he doesn’t accidentally harm the smeet or do something stupid. I don’t think Dib would let that happen though.” Tak replied.

Skoodge glanced at the two, “Don’t worry guys. I don’t Zim would harm its own smeet.” He assured, Keef nodded in agreement.

“I bet Dib’s going to be over protective of Sev.” Gaz began, “I can just see them getting mad at someone for wanting to hold them. And yelling at them like” she continued on, “GiVE mE mY bAbY!!!” Gaz jeered in an awful impression of her sibling.

Tak started rolling on the floor, “That was the worst Dib impression I’ve ever heard in my life.” She giggled, Gaz nodded in agreement. 

“I mean. I wouldn’t really blame them for being over protective, they were kidnapped…” Skoodge remarked, “True.” Gaz acknowledged, sipping her juice again.

•••

Zim zoomed through the galaxy, he had found the perfect place to eat. 

“Psst. Dibby.” Zim nagged, “Hm?” Dib grumbled, “We’re going to stop and get some food.” 

“Zim… Why are we in space??” Dib asked, “So it’s easier to reach that “Paris” place you wanted to go to.” Zim answered, “I never said I wanted to go to Paris??” Dib said, very confused. 

“Well anyway. We’re stopping at a space bar- I hope that’s fine.” Zim said, “A bar?? Zim we can’t legally drink yet! We’re only 13!” Dib pointed out, “It’s fine Dib!!! In space you only have to be at least 13 to go into a bar!” Zim assured, “Wow.” Dib remarked, Holy fuck alien culture is fucked up. He thought to himself as Zim parked the voot. 

“Also. It’s your turn to drive, Fishboy.” Zim smirked cheekily, “Oh shut it you.” Dib laughed with an affectionate eye-roll, then pressing his lips against Zim’s. 

Soon, Zim and the others stepped out of the voot and its trailer. Zim was holding Seven, in its arms.

Zim peeked it’s eyes through the windows, Seven glanced up at it, it could see a variety of alien silhouettes inside, Zim stared for a moment, but not long enough to bring attention to xyrself.

Xe could make out a Vortian silhouette and a human one. 

A Vortian?? A human?? Xe couldn’t believe xyr eyes.

Zim glanced down at his smeet, “Ready to go in there with Pap?” He asked, receiving a chirp from Seven in response.

Zim stalked along the premises in a cat like manner, waiting for the perfect time to walk in.

Meanwhile, the customers sat inside, sipping their drinks and munching on their food.

One of the employees was wiping down a table after a customer left, they couldn’t help but feel a sense of unease in the air as they wiped down the table though, as if something bad was about to happen. 

The bar tenders were serving drinks, the janitor was sweeping the floors, and the customers were consuming their food and drinks. Such as space burgers, milkshakes and cocktails. Each one having originated from different planets, such Meekrob, Vort, Blorch etc. 

But then, a mysterious, shadowy figure barged into the bat wing doors of the bar like a cowboy entering a saloon in an old Wild West film. 

Everyone froze in shock, stopping what they were doing and staring at the mysterious figure with flabbergasted expressions.

“No… it can’t be!” One alien exclaimed as gasps of shock arose from the customers. 

One of the bartenders from behind the bar nearly fainted at the sight.

Among them, Mr Dwinky, Mooshy, Spoopty and others could be seen. Even Mr Elliot was there. 

Mr Dwinky nearly spat out his manhattan, Mr Elliot stopped eating his space nachos, and Mooshy and Spoopty nearly spat out their space cola’s.

“Invader Zim!” One customer shouted, flabbergasted.

“I-Invader Zim?? I thought he was dead?” One customer questioned. 

“Yes! It is I! Invader Zim!! I am alive and well!” Zim proclaimed as he walked inside, his boots making loud noises as they hit the creaky floorboards. Dib followed behind, walking like a normal person. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, but he was wearing a pair of ripped up black skinny jeans and had his trench coat wrapped around his waist.

They had walked towards the bar. 

“Dib?? What happened to your chest??” Mr Dwinky asked, noticing the two scars on it. “Top surgery.” Dib answered, “How did you get top surgery? Aren’t you a bit too young to get that?” Mr Dwinky asked, “Well.. when you have an alien boyfriend a lot of things are possible.” Dib answered with a smile, making a silly face. 

“Alien boyfriend?? Are you and Zim dating??” Mr Dwinky questioned, “Yes!” Zim smirked, “We even have a smeet, or as you humans say, a baby.  I accidentally created them out of my dna on this weird ass planet.” Zim adds, finishing his sentence, holding Seven. 

Zim then walked to the bar, holding Seven, who was squirming and took a seat. Seven placed in his lap. 

Lard Nar stood behind at the bar, staring at Zim. “Aren’t you too young to drink? I don’t think an 11 year old should be drinking.” He said, “I’m 13. I can legally drink.” Zim said, getting ready to take a seat.

Dib soon joined him, soon followed by Gaz Tak and everyone else. “Mr Elliot?? What are you doing here??” Gaz questioned, “Gaz! Nice to see you!” Mr Elliot greeted, “We were just here for a drink.” He adds. “Nice. I’m just here stopping for something to eat.” Gaz said, then walking towards the bar, Tak and Mimi following suit.

“I’ll take a starry night martini please.” Zim said, Dib scanned the menu for something without alcohol. “Uh.. I’ll just get a hot chocolate or something. With extra marshmallows and whipped cream.” Dib smiled.

“Would you like anything to eat?” Lard Nar asked, “Yeah uh… I’ll get a Meekrob style croissant. With extra chocolate.” Dib smiled, “I’ll eat some stew.” Zim said.

Soon, the two’s food and drinks arrived. Zim and Dib ate, enjoying their food.

“Since when were you guys dating?” Lard Nar questioned, “Since a year ago. It all started after I had to help them with their math homework. And then we became friends… and then it escalated into… something more.” Zim explained, “Wow… that’s crazy. Good for you though.” Lard Nar said. 

“Yeah he’s the best siren ever.” Zim beamed, “Siren? As in those Urthinoid creatures that live in water?” Lard Nar questioned, “Yeah. You just gotta splash him with salt water. Then he becomes one.” Zim answered with an explanation.

“He’s a very cute and handsome  siren.” It adds, Dib blushed a shade of crimson. Lard Nar noticed a irken smeet in Zim’s lap. “Zim, where did you the smeet?” Lard Nar questioned, “Oh. They’re my smeet.” Zim answered. Lard Nar had a shocked look on his face. “Don’t worry. I accidentally created them out of my dna on this weird planet.” Zim clarified.

“They’re one of the best things that ever happened to me” It smiled, “Awe. That’s nice.” Lard Nar smiled back, earning a nod in agreement from Zim in response.

One of customers glanced at the group, “What ever happened to the Tallest? I heard that Irk’s been in shambles ever since that Florpus hole sucked them and the Massive inside.” They asked, “Were not sure. They’re probably dead though. How some people still think they might be alive.” Tenn answered.

“Honestly good. Fuck those bitches.” Zim chimed in, earning confused and shocked glances from almost everyone  in the room, except Lard Nar. “They lied to me for 3 years of my life and treated me like a joke. I was too stupid and naïve to see it at first, but it’s all clear as day to me now.” Xe said. “Yeah I second that.” Lard Nar chimed in.

Zim and Dib glanced at each other, Anyways, thanks for the food.” Zim smiled, leaving some cash as xe and the others leaving the bar and going back to the voot.

Lard Nar and the others stood there in shock, “I still can’t believe the infamous Invader Zim and his human boyfriend came here.” one of customers said. “Me too. That was crazy.” One replied in agreement.

“This is certainly something I’m not going to forget.” Lard Nar remarked, placing the cash in the cash register and wiping down the bar.

Zim and Dib zoomed around, Dib holding Seven close.

Dib was surfing the map, noticing an Ugly-Mart location nearby. 

“Hey Zim. How about we make a stop at Ugly-Mart?” Dib suggested. 

“Oh! Sounds good.” Zim smiled, letting the others know about the stop.

The group got out of the vehicle and started walking to the entrance of Ugly-Mart after parking.

Dib immediately headed towards baby section to get stuff for Seven, like the stuff you usually need for a baby, like diapers, pacifiers and all that jazz.

“Where are you going, Dibby?” Zim asked, “To get stuff for Sev.” Dib smiled, Zim then walked away and looked around, hoping it would help take his mind off what he was thinking about.

Tak and Gaz went to the video game section, Tenn was looking around in the clothes, and Keef and Skoodge were looking in the art supply department.

Gir and Mimi had went to the snack section.

Zim just walked around in the frozen food section, knowing that he probably couldn’t eat most of the things in there. He frowned as he looked at the boxes of those frozen soup dumplings Dib loved so much.

It saw the three varieties of them you buy, Pork, Chicken and Beef. A soy sauce packet included in each box. 

Zim grabbed a box of waffles for itself, as it was one of the few foods it could eat without vomiting or having an allergic reaction. It walked around some more. 

Eventually, Zim somehow found itself in the baby food section, where all the bottles, baby formula and disgusting, revolting looking baby food was kept.

Zim let out a sigh as it glanced at the shelf of baby food right in front of xem. Reminding xem of xyr smeet.

He stared at the shelf of gross looking baby food, with flavors like “Turkey and Gravy”, “Chicken Pot Pie” and “Mac and Cheese”, which made his stomach churn. 

I can’t take this anymore. Zim thought as he soon walked away, not knowing where he was headed next.

Thoughts raced through its mind like swimming sailfish. 

What if I treat them like how  they  treated me? 

•••

Gir and Mimi lurked in the cookie section, Gir was gushing over all the different types of cookies they were selling. 

“Can’t wait to buy all of these!!!” Gir smiled, “Me too. Then we can eat them while watching godawful movies!!” Mimi chimed in. 

“Let’s go find the popcorn now!” Gir said, “Alright, sounds good.” Mimi replied as the two walked to the second snack section, where the popcorn was located.

Gir glanced at Mimi, “Which kind of we get?” It asked, “Hm… movie theater butter.” Mimi answered.

“Okie dokie!” Gir grinned, throwing the box of popcorn into the mini shopping cart.

“Let’s go to the bargain bin now!” Mimi suggested, receiving an okie dokie from Gir in response. 

Gir and Mimi ran to the bargain bin, Mimi dove into the endless sea of DVD’s. “Hey Gir! Look! They have Alligators on a Train! And Beetleguts!” Mimi smiled, holding up the DVD’s in her paws.

“YIPPEE!!!” Gir shouted, diving into the bin of DVD’s.

•••

Dib and Seven walked around in the baby food section, “Hopefully we can find something you can eat.” Dib said as he glanced down at Seven, who was inside a makeshift baby carrier he had made out of random flannel he had found lying around.

Dib searched through the baby food on the shelves, nearly gagging at some of options, “Who the hell is feeding this shit to their child?!” They remarked in disgust at the sight of “Turkey and Gravy” and “Mac and Cheese” baby food.

“I don’t you can eat that- you probably have a meat allergy like Zim does. Plus, it looks disgusting. I wouldn’t make you eat that anyway.” Dib said as they glanced down at Seven.

Dib then moved onto the fruit and vegetable baby food, “Oh god. Not the beets.” Dib remarked at the sight of beet flavored baby food, “Bring the beat in.” Gaz chimed in, Dib flinching. “Oh my god Gaz you scared me.” Dib laughed, “Yeah sorry. Me and Tak found vampire piggy merch. Sorry I just wanted to tell you.” Gaz said. “Okay, cool.” Dib said before turning their attention back to the baby food section.

Gaz started walking away, going back to where Tak was standing, “What was Dib doing?” She asked, “They were looking at baby food. I nearly vomited   at some of flavors they had in there.” Gaz answered.

“Ew.” Tak remarked, her and Gaz heading back to the video game section, “I swear to god. Baby food always looks so fucking disgusting. Why would you feed this to your child?!” Gaz commented as her and Tak walked back, Tak nodded in agreement. “Yeah. Like why do they have to look so revolting?!” Tak replied as the two finally made it back.

Dib was still looking around in the baby stuff, nearly vomiting at the disgusting ass baby food flavors.

Dib picked out a few, some that actually looked decent or even good.

Like Strawberry Banana, and Pears for example.

“How about we go look at something else?” He said, looking down at Seven after placing the baby food in the small shopping basket he was carrying. Seven just let out a chirp of approval in response.

Dib and Seven headed to the baby clothes section. Dib began looking around, however, a specific shirt caught his eye.

On the rack, was a funny onesie that said “My Dad’s are Crazy. And I’m Not Afraid to Use Them.” Dib immediately snatched it off the rack. “Yeah. We’re buying this.” He said, placing inside the basket.

Dib then found some cute miniature converse for Seven to wear, which he knew he had to buy immediately.

Dib also grabbed Seven a pair of socks as well. 

Zim was walking around, until he found Dib going crazy in the baby section. He felt a little uneasy at the sight of all the baby stuff, and Seven. “Hey Zimmy.” Dib purred after noticing Zim, “Hi Dib-fish.” Zim replied, trying to act as if everything was fine.

“I found stuff for them.” Dib smiled, showing Zim a few things they had found. “Oh- nice.” Zim replied nervously as he glanced down at the onesie Dib had showed him.

“I think we should get ready to go.” Zim said, Dib nodded in agreement.

Soon, the two noticed Keef and Skoodge, walking around with art supplies in their arms.

“Hi guys!” Keef greeted, holding a box of colorful pens in his hands. “Hi Keef. You’re not going to believe the amount of disgusting looking baby food I saw.” Dib replied, “Oh god- Did you see the “Mac and Cheese” flavored one?” Keef questioned, “Yes. Unfortunately.” Dib answered with a frown. 

“Ew.” Skoodge gagged, Zim felt a sense of unease at the baby talk. However, thankfully Tak, Gaz and Tenn arrived.

Tenn was wearing a dress they were definitely wearing before they walked into the store, as the group headed to the check out.

Gir and Mimi came back with smore making supplies and popcorn, some movies, along with some other snacks. 

“Why did you get stuff for s’mores?” Keef questioned, “Gir thought we could go to a camp site at the beach or something. In the woods.” Mimi answered.

“Well then, I’ll start looking at camp sites on the map then.” Dib proclaimed, Skoodge handing him a map.

“That’s why I brought a guitar. To subject everyone to my god awful singing!!!” Gaz smiled, “I don’t think it’s god awful. I think it’s quite beautiful, in fact.” Tak replied, Gaz beginning to blush in response.

Zim began scanning the items, feeling a sense of an unease at all the baby stuff, but was relieved when Gir handed it all of the snacks and such. 

Once all the items were bagged, Zim placed them in the shopping cart.

“Now, time to go find a camp site.” Zim declared as the group headed back to the voot, Dib busy tickling Seven’s stomach as Zim put all of the items in the floorboards.

“It’s your turn to drive, Dibby.” Zim said, “I know.” Dib replied, slightly annoyed, knowing that they had to do that. 

“I also brought some music we can listen to.” Zim said, wiping a brunt cd. “I put a lot of Nirvana songs on this one.” He smirked, “Dude. What’s up with the constant smirking???” Dib questioned, raising an eyebrow, Zim not answering their question.

The two climbed into the voot, “Do you want to hold Sev?” Dib asked, “I mean. They are our smeet.” He adds.

Our smeet… that had hit him hard. He wasn’t just a stupid kid anymore. He was a parent. A person with tasks and responsibilities.

Zim went quiet, feeling knots form in his alien stomach at the mention of “our smeet.” 

“N-no thanks..” Zim replied nervously, giving a fake smile, pretending to be completely fine, not wanting to concern Dib. “Okay then?” Dib replied awkwardly, slightly noticing Zim’s strange behavior. 

Seven was seated in Dib’s lap as he drove, he glanced over at Zim. “Am I doing this right?” They questioned, “Yes, Dibby.” Zim assured. 

“I wanna help!” Seven squeaked, “Sorry Sev, i don’t think your Pap would be happy if i let you drive.” Dib apologized, Seven frowned.

Zim just stared out the window as Dib drove, practically drowning in the suffocating sea known as its thoughts. 

It wanted to cry. But knew that, it couldn’t. At least, not now. Not with Dib or Seven around.

The three sat in the voot in silence, eerie silence. 

Normally, Zim would’ve been blabbing about HDTL or something, but xe wasn’t.

Dib glanced over at Zim, “Hey, Spaceboy. You okay? You’ve been quiet.” He asked. 

“Oh! Yeah! I’m fine!” Zim insisted, lying. “Okay then?” Dib replied, unconvinced, turning his attention back to driving.

Dib stared at the map in his lap. 

“Skoodge thinks that he found a nice camp site stay at, so we’ll be staying there.” They said, “Okay.” Zim replied quietly.

Soon, the group arrived at the campsite, Dib went to the front and got a site, and got some other stuff while he was at it.

“Uh guys… we don’t have sleeping bags- or tents.” Tak realized. 

“Don’t worry! I brought tents and sleeping bags!” Keef assured as he got out of the voot’s trailer, dragging out tents and sleeping bags.

“Damn. You were really prepared for this-“ Dib remarked, “Yep! I like being prepared!” Keef smiled.

“I brought a sleeping bag too. It’s my Dad’s. I stole it. Just in case. I only brought one though-“ Dib said.

“I didn’t bring one.” Zim chimed in, “I have a blanket though.” He adds. 

Dib glanced over at him, “We can share one if you want.” Dib offered, Zim didn’t say anything in response, too consumed in its own thoughts.

The group set up camp, Keef started a fire, and whipped out some leftover brisket that he had in a container. 

“What is that?” Dib questioned, raising his eyebrow, “Brisket.” Keef answered, placing the container on their chair.

Everyone gathered around the fire, “I brought something.” Gaz said, whipping out her acoustic guitar, “I know a song we can play!” Keef smiled, happily eating leftover brisket.

“Okay then.” Gaz replied, “Anything you have in mind?” She asked, Keef nodded, whispering in her ear.

“This is a great song!” Keef smiled, Skoodge whipped out a kazoo from his pocket.

“1, 2, 3, 4!” 

Gaz then started playing the riff of It Smells Like Teen Spirt by Nirvana, and Skoodge began playing his kazoo.

However, Keef didn’t start singing the lyrics to the song, rather some of his own.

“Load up on herbs, bring your kids, it’s fun to eat and to drink beer.” Keef began, singing.

Tenn began snickering, Dib spat out some of the Arizona green tea he was drinking.

“He’s overweight, and loves his food. I know her recipe.” Keef continued, receiving confused looks from everyone in response.

“Brisket! Brisket! Brisket! Brisket!” Keef continued, Tenn, Tak and Gaz joining him, laughing their asses off in the process.

Gir and Mimi started smacking frying pants together, singing along too. Dib joined in too, Zim just awkwardly sat there for a minute, before deciding to join in as well.

Once the song was finished, Zim whipped out a ukulele from out of nowhere. “Zim can play the guitar too!” Zim smiled.

Dib spat out his Arizona green tea. “That’s a fucking a ukulele-“ He wheezed, “Shut it, Fishboy.” Zim purred affectionately, gently kissing Dib’s cheek. 

“Where the hell did you even get that??” Dib asked, “I stole it that one time your scary sister and Tak-stink dragged us to that “Instrument Center” place. That same place where you played Lemon Demon on that old, DISGUSTING piano.” Zim explained.

“Wow.” Gaz remarked, Tak rolled mew eyes after Zim referred to mew as “Tak-stink”.

Zim then started playing the riff to Blink 182’s I Miss You.

Tak, Gaz and Skoodge immediately knew what song he was playing, “It’s going to be awful, I just know it.” Gaz whispered with a snicker, Tak just snickered back.

Gaz started wheezing at Zim’s awful singing, Dib shot a death stare at her in response, she then stopped.

Zim turned to face Dib as it sang “We can live like Jack and Sally.” Line. 

Once Zim had finished singing the song, Gaz started roasting hot dogs over the fire, and Dib started making s’mores.

“Hey babe, want one?” Dib offered as a s’more was stuffed in his mouth. Offering a s’more to Zim. “Sure.” Zim smiled, snatching the gooey, sweet smelling s’more from Dib’s hand. Zim savored the flavor. “You like that, hm?” Dib smiled, Zim nodded, smiling back.

Seven also ate one, sharing it with Gir and Mimi, getting chocolate and marshmallows everywhere.

Dib turned to face their sister. 

“You should play a song for us, Gaz.” Dib said, “No.” Gaz replied, “Come on. You’re a siren. That’s what we’re supposed to do.” Dib replied back. “Ug. Fine.” Gaz grumbled, trying to figure out what song to play. 

After some thinking, she finally found the one. 

“Uh… I guess I’ll play this one.” She said, as she started strumming. 

Tak immediately knew what song it was, Where Did You Sleep Last Night? (Or otherwise, In The Pines) from Nirvana’s MTV Unplugged album.

Tak admired Gaz with hearts fluttering in her eyes as she watched her beloved siren sing, something she usually only did around her.

It was there thing.

“That was wonderful, Gazzy.” Tak smiled, using her personal pet name for the siren once she had finished. “Thank you.” Gaz replied softly, a tone she only used when talking to Tak. 

Skoodge glanced down at his watch and looked at the time, “I think we should head to bed.” He commented, showing the time.

“Yeah. I am feeling sluggish.” Tak admitted, the others nodding in agreement.

The group split up and headed to their respective tents. 

Dib set up their sleeping bag, noticing how messy Seven’s shirt was. “Let’s get you a new shirt to wear-“ They remarked at the sight, rummaging through their suitcase until he found one.

Dib carefully changed Seven into fresh, clean clothes. “There, that’s much better.” He smiled, then putting some socks on Seven’s feet to make sure they wouldn’t get cold. 

Dib then prepared some dinner for them, he was feeding Seven as Zim took his shirt off, getting ready for bed.

“Hey Dib-fish. I’m gonna go piss. I’ll be right back.” Zim said, “I did not need that information.” Dib remarked as he was almost finished feeding Seven some dinner. 

Soon, Zim came back, taking off his wig and eye contacts.

Dib noticed that Zim was sleeping on the floor of the tent, with just a blanket over him. 

“Zim?” Dib questioned, “Do you want to sleep with me instead?” They offered, lifting up a piece of their ridiculously large sleeping bag, Seven curled in a ball like a kitten.

“Sure..” Zim replied, reluctantly crawling inside of the sleeping bag with Dib, not sure if it was even deserving of it, given how it hadn’t really helped Dib with Seven that much.

Zim cuddled up beside Dib, Dib quickly wrapping their arms around it. 

“This reminds me of that one time we went camping not long before x-mas and how cold I was.” Zim grumbled as it buried its head into Dib’s bare chest, Seven smushed between them. 

“Oh yeah I remember that. You were freezing. You were so cold that you snuggled against my shirt for warmth. It was honestly really cute-“ Dib blushed, thinking back to that time.

Zim crawled into the sleeping bag with Dib, freezing its ass off. Dib was wearing that one, ridiculously large Lemon Demon shirt that was way too big for him that he liked wearing to bed, and Zim was wearing a tank top. 

Zim snuggled up close to Dib, “it’s so cold.” Xe stammered as xe smashed xyr face into Dib’s chest. Dib wrapped his arms around Zim, “Hey Dibby… can I ask you something- I’m sorry if it sounds weird.” Zim began, “Oh? Uh.. sure I guess?” Dib replied, “Can I snuggle against your shirt” Zim asked, “I understand if you’re not comfortable with that.” He adds.

Dib went silent for a moment, thinking. “Sure I guess. Just don’t talk about my chest please…” They finally said, allowing Zim to snuggle against their shirt.

Zim wrapped his arms around Dib. “Holy shit you weren’t kidding when you said you were cold!” Dib flinched, “Oh… you’re so warm and snuggly…” Zim purred, “Thanks.” Was all Dib said before cuddling Zim tight.

“Goodnight, love bug.” Dib purred softly, “Goodnight, my handsome Fishboy.” Zim purred back, Dib feeling a sense of euphoria after being called handsome.

“Yeah. And then on X-mas Eve Tak threw punch at you during the Christmas party at my aunt’s house.” Dib wheezed, “THAT’S NOT FUNNY!” Zim snapped out embarrassment, flattening xyr antennae, magenta colored blush appearing on xyr face.

Dib giggled some more, Zim let out an offended scoff. “You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed.” Dib laughed, “Oh shut it, Fishboy!” Zim spat, still blushing, shutting Dib up with a kiss. 

Zim was anxious about Seven being so close to xem, xe almost wanted to gently push them away, but knew that xe couldn’t.

Zim quivered nervously as Dib slept and as Seven snugged close to him, Dib having his arms wrapped around the two of them.

Zim almost wanted to leave, but couldn’t. He was to warm and cozy, his head buried into Dib’s neck, and Seven smushed between the two of them, purring and nuzzling the two.

Zim was a little taken aback, Seven continued to do the same thing, meanwhile Dib was mumbling about raw salmon in his sleep, and getting drool all over Zim.

I need to get away from this…

Zim carefully crawled out of the sleeping bag and quietly walked outside. 

You’re a bad father. He thought to himself as he walked to the bathroom, its eyes feeling puffy. 

Dib noticed Zim was gone, he went to go look for it.

“Stay here, ‘kay?” He said, glancing down at Seven who he’d just accidentally awoken. “Okay!” Seven replied, soon curling up into a ball to get some sleep.

Dib walked to the bathroom, only wearing his pajama pants and his coat which he had lazily thrown over. 

“Zim??” Dib questioned, peering his head into the bathroom.

Zim wiped its tears away, trying to hide the fact it was just crying. “Hi Dibby!” It said, sniffling.

Dib noticed Zim’s puffy eyes and ruined eyeliner. “Were you… crying?” He asked, staring into his boyfriend’s eyes. 

“N-no! Zim does not cry!” Zim denied out of embarrassment, but Dib could see right through xyr bullshit. 

Dib pulled Zim close, wiping the tears off xyr face. “Please tell me what’s wrong.” He begged, a frown appearing on his face. “F-fine.” Zim stammered.

“I-I’m scared.” It admitted, Dib looked a little surprised, “I-I’m afraid of treating Sev like how my Tallest treated me!” Zim finally said, tearing up. It’s throat beginning to ache from so much crying.

“Zim… I-“ Dib uttered, I should’ve known… I should’ve noticed…

He was trying to find the right words to say, “You see… My Dad didn’t exactly treat me the best when I was younger. He wasn’t exactly that involved. Even if he’s definitely a much better parent than he was before. But… we have each other and our weird family. We can both care for Sev.” Dib assured, gently stroking a trembling Zim. 

“Thank you Dibby.. I’ve just been so anxious.. I keep having nightmares about accidentally hurting them or saying something wrong.. making the same mistakes my Tallest did! Treating them like they treated me!” Zim croaked as smudged black eyeliner rolled down its cheeks. 

“I’m sorry about how you were treated. You didn’t deserve that.” They apologized, “Please don’t apologize Dibby.” Zim insisted, “It’s not your fault.” Xe adds. “I know but.. kind of having an idea of what happened on Irk and based off the little things that you’ve told me about Irken society. It sounds like hell. I can’t help but feel terrible.” Dib said.”

“It was.. I’m honestly glad I got out of that place.. I was far too stupid to see them for who they really were.” Zim sniffled, letting out a grunt towards the end. 

“You weren’t stupid Zim, you were just young and didn’t know!” Dib assured, “Thanks Dib-love. I can always count on you.” Zim sniffled, “You’re welcome.” Dib smiled, “If you ever need someone to talk too, I’ll always be there.” They assured, helping Zim off the bathroom floor.

Zim then looked in the bathroom mirror, noticing how xyr eyeliner was messed up, “Ah shit.” Zim remarked, “Here, let me help you clean that.” Dib offered, handing Zim a soft tissue. “Thanks, Dib-fish.” Zim purred affectionately, “You’re welcome, Spaceboy.” Dib said, whipping the mess off of Zim’s face. 

Zim and Dib headed out of the bathroom and outside, the sun was on the horizon, “Do you want me to help you put your eyeliner on when we get inside?” Dib asked, “Sure.” Zim answered.

The two got inside their tent, Seven was still asleep, Dib was preparing their food. 

“Let me help you with that.” Zim said, helping Dib prepare Seven’s food. “I’ll feed them!” Zim proclaimed, getting Seven ready to eat. 

Zim fed Seven some food, “Aw.. I think they like that one.” Dib smiled, “Yeah. It’s not disgusting and actually looks appetizing. Unlike those other revolting flavors in that baby food aisle!” Zim gagged.

Zim carefully (and, anxiously.) fed Seven their food. “Good job Zim.” Dib smiled, giving Zim a pat on the back.

“Can you help me put my eyeliner on?” Zim asked, “Sure thing, pretty boy.” Dib smiled, Zim blushed after being called a pretty boy. 

“Hold still.” Dib said, carefully shaking up the bottle of liquid eyeliner before applying it to Zim’s face. 

Dib made sure it was thick kind of eyeliner that Zim liked. The classic scemo eyeliner. 

“Thanks.” Zim purred, then giving Dib a kiss, Dib returned the gesture.

Dib got Seven dressed, putting on the socks and shoes they had bought for them. “Aw. You’re such a cute baby.” Dib purred, cuddling Seven close.

“Come on Dibby. Let’s go wake up your horrifying sister and Tak-stink.” Zim said, “Alright then.” Dib replied, carrying Seven and their things.

“Hey! Dib-sister! Tak-stink!!!” Zim yelled, Tak let out a groan, “Thanks a lot for rudely awakening us.” Tak grumbled sleepily and sarcastically, antennae flattened.

She was wearing an oversized Bratmobile shirt and pajama pants. 

“We gotta get on the road, you know.” Zim nagged.

“You know. I would beat the shit out of you right now but I genuinely don’t have the energy to do so.” Tak deadpanned then closing the tent door, Zim let out a giggle in a response.

Tak gently nudged Gaz, “Hey sleepyhead.” She smiled affectionately, Gaz let out a sleepy groan before getting out of the sleeping bag that her and Tak had shared. 

Tak grabbed some Arizona green teas to drink, the two sat in the tent in silence, drinking tea in peace. 

“This would probably be better warm… sorry I didn’t warm it up first-“ Tak remarked, “You’re fine, don’t worry about it tic-tak.” Gaz assured, then taking a loud and dramatic sip of her drink.

Gaz then whipped out her makeup pallet, “I can do that for you if you want.” Tak offered, “Thanks.” Gaz smiled slightly.

Tak gently applied Gaz’s favorite purple eyeshadow and her eyeliner, “Thank you, now it’s my turn.” Gaz declared happily, applying Tak’s favorite shade of blue and some eyeliner.

Soon, Keef, Skoodge and Tenn awoke. 

Tak, Gaz and the others got ready to go.

“So, where are we headed to next?” Gaz asked, “Georgia, as Keef requested.” Zim answered. “That should be fun! I heard they have good peaches.” Tak smiled, “Yeah! And sweet tea!” Skoodge chimed in.

“Yeah. Skoodge became a sweet tea addicted because of Keef!” Tenn joked, “I mean- you’re not exactly wrong- it is addictive.” Skoodge admitted sheepishly.

“Well, I guess we better get going then!” Dib said, getting the voot ready to go, “Mhm.” Zim agreed.

Soon, Zim set up a video communication device so he could communicate with the others, it also got nice and cozy, “I’ll drive!” Dib declared, handing Seven to Zim. 

“I’m gonna play some music.” Zim smirked, “Okay then.” Dib replied as Zim inserted his burnt cd, which definitely didn’t have illegally downloaded music from Mapster.com 

Soon, Dib could hear the sound of Vampire Money by My Chemical Romance being blasted through the voot’s speakers.

And, to be honest, he was really enjoying it. 

Dib had heard some My Chemical Romance songs as, Gaz would typically blast Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge on repeat, but he wouldn’t normally pay attention.

Well, until Zim wouldn’t shut up about lore on the band and their albums that is. Zim wouldn’t shut up about the Demolition Lovers and Pepe and such, which made Dib become intrigued.

Zim and Dib sang along to the lyrics of Vampire Money as the two zoomed through the sky, the others joining in. 

Zim was captivated by Dib’s singing, “Oh Fishboy, you have such a beautiful voice.” It remarked sweetly. “Thank you.” Dib smiled.

After about an hour and 20 minutes, Zim’s cd ended. It carefully took it out and put it back in its case. “My turn.” Dib declared, whipping out their playlist using their flip phone.

It had mostly Lemon Demon, Cavetown, The Front Bottoms and other Midwest emo bands, with other stuff thrown in there as well.

“Are we there yet?” Keef asked as Father by The Front Bottoms blasted from Dib’s flip phone. 

“Nope.” Dib answered, “But we’re getting close!” He smiled. 

Dib noticed the amount of Waffle Cottage’s, Dollar Sergeants, and Wiggly Piggly’s.

“WHY ARE THERE WAFFLE COTTAGES EVERYWHERE?!” Zim questioned, “You’ll be seeing those a lot in this region!” Keef smiled, “Holy shit Keef. You weren’t kidding when you said that Waffle Cottage’s were everywhere down here.” Dib remarked. 

“You know, why don’t we stop there for some brunch?” Tenn suggested, “WAFFLES!!!” Gir shouted, “Yeah. I could use a snack.” Dib chimed in, before looking for a parking spot.

Dib parked the voot before getting out. 

Zim put on his disguise, along with Seven’s as him and the others got out. 

“Hey guys. I’m going to warn you that some crazy stuff might happen in here- Waffle Cottage kind of has a reputation for that-“ Keef warned, “Got it.” Dib replied.

The group walked inside, taking a seat at a large booth, surfing the menu.

Gir and Mimi got some waffles to share, Dib got the hash brown combo meal, Skoodge got some chocolate chip waffles, Keef got the eggs, bacon and waffle combo meal. Gaz and Tak got the blueberry waffle combo meal, and Zim got strawberry waffles, with extra strawberries and whipped cream on top. 

Zim and Dib shared their food with Seven, who was very much enjoying the waffles and hash browns. “Aw.. they like hash browns!” Zim smiled as it watched Seven devoured the hash brown Dib had given them. Dib just smiled back at Zim in response.

Everyone continued to eat, until they were interrupted by two employees fighting that is, everyone dropped their forks and stopped eating, overhearing the fight.

They all awkwardly sat in silence for a few.

“Damn Keef. You weren’t kidding.” Dib remarked, breaking the awkward silence. Keef nodded.

“Let’s get out of here-“ Skoodge suggested, the others nodding in agreement before Dib left a payment on the table before him and the others left.

••

The group had arrived in Georgia, stopping by Peach World and getting some peaches and peach flavored things for good measure. Like peach flavored soft serve. 

Dib shared his peach soft serve with Seven, Seven savoring the flavor every time.

The night was on the horizon, the sky was beginning to turn to hues of pink and orange. 

However, Dib’s body began to feel unpleasantly dry.

Fuck. They thought, realizing their body was craving salt water. 

They craved the salty water of the sea, he could already imagine the smell of the waves and sea breeze.

“Hey Zim… I think I need salt water. My body feels dry…” Dib said as he held Seven in his arms. 

“Alright then Fishboy!” Zim replied, “Hey guys. I think we’re going to have to take an emergency beach stop.” Zim said, “YES PLEASE. MY BODY FEELS DRY AS FUCK!” Gaz complained.

Soon, Zim managed to locate a nice spot on a secluded beach, parking the voot there.

The sun was now beginning to sink below the horizon, making way for starry night. 

Dib ripped his shirt off as he stepped onto the sand, thankful it wasn’t scolding hot. 

Keef began to set up camp as Dib and Gaz ran to the waves as fast as their legs could carry them. 

Skoodge, Keef and Tenn were setting up a fire.

Soon, the sirens emerged from the waves, Zim admired Dib’s tail as it swished around in the water, as the moonlight made Dib’s beautiful emerald green and light green scales shimmer. 

Love fluttered in his eyes as he glanced up at Zim, who had gotten down to their level. 

Dib leaned forward, placing a kiss on Zim’s lips. 

Zim smiled afterwards, “Wanna go cuddle by the fire?” Xe asked, Dib nodded, “in a moment. I wanna stay here a bit longer.” He said, Zim nodded in response.

After putting on her bathing suit, Tak joined Gaz in the water, “Wow. The water feels nice.” She commented, “Dude. How are you not getting an allergic reaction from that??” Dib questioned, “I built a resistance to water, unlike Zim.” She answered as she floated around sea otter style with Gaz. 

“Wanna go cuddle by the fire now, Dibby?” Zim asked, “Sure.” Dib answered, allowing Zim to pick him up and carry him.

“My handsome Fishboy.” Zim purred as held a drenched, soaking wet Dib in xyr arms, Dib began to blush softly. 

Once the two had arrived by the fire, Zim let out a yelp. “MY SPINE!” Xe complained, “I thought you would’ve been used to holding him by now- you’ve been picking him up like that for a year or something at this point-“ Skoodge remarked, “Here’s some painkiller!” Keef said, handing a bottle of it to Zim. “Thanks Keef.” Zim replied.

Tenn then gave Zim a drink, Zim thanked her, Tenn then joined them by the fire with Seven.

“Here’s Sev.” Tenn said, handing Seven to Zim and Dib. “Thanks for watching them!” Dib thanked, “It was no problem, really!” Tenn smiled, fiddling with their perm. 

Dib had Seven glued to their chest as Zim had them wrapped up in a towel, Dib had Seven bundled up in their trench coat.

Gir and Mimi were aggressively eating s’mores, ripping them apart in a game of tug-o-war. 

Skoodge let out a giggle as he walked past them, fetching some extra marshmallows as Zim, Tenn and Dib made references to Mean Girls.

“This is my Dib. He is too bisexual and biromantic to function.” Zim referenced, Tenn nearly falling off its seat.

“TOO BISEXUAL TO FUNCTION-“ purr wheezed, spitting out the space cola she had been drinking. 

“I mean. You’re not wrong.” Dib admitted.

Gir and Mimi soon joined them, roasting marshmallows, “I’m so fetch!” Gir smiled with a scoff, “I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK!” Mimi quoted, “Here you go!” Gir replied, handing Mimi a pink shirt.

Mimi rose her eyebrow at it, wondering where the hell it’d had gotten that shirt. 

It probably stole it from Ugly-Mart or something. She figured.

Gaz and Tak floated on their backs like sea otters as they watched the stars glimmer above, not caring about whatever Zim and Dib were doing. 

Tak figured they were doing something stupid, meanwhile Gaz jokingly figured they were busy making out or something. 

“This is the life.” Gaz smiled calmly as she held Tak’s hand sea otter style. “Mhm.” Tak agreed with a smile as her and Gaz sipped some green tea.

“You know. I wonder how Zim and Dib are going to balance school and a baby.” Gaz wondered, “Yeah. Me too. I wonder how they’ll balance taking care of Sev and exams.” Tak replied.

“You know. We could always help them if they need it. We can be Sev’s cool wine aunts.” Gaz suggested.

“Hm… cool wine aunt? I like that.” Tak giggled, “Mhm. We could take them to Hot Topic after school.” Gaz grinned, “Baby bat taken literally.” Tak replied with a chuckle.

The two got out of the water, heading over to the fire and taking a seat, eating some s’mores and dinner. 

“Hey. Dibby. Wanna sleep under the stars tonight?” Zim asked.

“Sure.” Dib answered with a smile. 

Dib got nice and cozy under the blankets with Zim and Seven breaking out his laptop. 

“Whatcha doin’?” Zim asked, “Calling Agent Sasquatch.” Dib answered, receiving a thumbs up in approval from Zim.

He logged onto discord, calling his friend Agent Sasquatch.

Soon, he saw the familiar face of Agent Sasquatch. Brown curling hair and eyes, and the lumber jack hat. “Hi Moth! Hi Zim!” He greeted. 

“Hey man. Sorry I didn’t get back to you sooner- my life’s been a bit crazy. Uh. Basically I became a Dad and have been busy with that.” Dib explained.

Agent Sasquatch spat out his drink. “How did you become a parent???” he asked. Dib picked up Seven, “Uh… well… my boyfriend went on some weird planet and accidentally cloned himself pretty much.” Dib explained, Zim smiling in the background. 

Dib held Seven up, “Their name is Seven, but we call them Seven or Sevvy for short.” Dib grinned, holding Seven in his hands. 

Agent Sasquatch let out an aw.

“Wow! Hope parenthood goes well for you!” Agent Sasquatch said, “Thanks man. I really appreciate it.” Dib smiled, “No problem! Anyway, I have to go- I think my mom’s calling me.” Agent Sasquatch said, Dib gave him a thumbs up in response. 

Agent Sasquatch then ended the call.

Dib then put their laptop away, noticing how Zim pulled out his, he was updating his fic, What Lurks Below the Salty Sea Foam.

“I can’t believe this is the second to last update-“ it said as it typed out the author’s note. 

A/N 

HI BITCHEZ XD!!! Sorry this chapter is kind of late! I became a Papa recently- I accidentally cloned myself and now I have a baby-

So uh- if I start updating less that’s why!!!

Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter!! Can’t wait to finally see Momo’s reaction to Nino’s siren form!!! And other shit happening!! XP! I made this one extra angsty! >:3

Tak had mew laptop open, she was scrolling through her emails, then seeing how mew current favorite fanfic had just been updated.

What Lurks Below the Salty Sea Foam by Lik_A_Stick on Fanfiction.com.

It was mew favorite author in the Haunted Dolls That Lurk fandom, and the author wrote fanfics of mew favorite pairing, Fluttering Ravens, or otherwise Nino/Raven. 

She let out a squeak of excitement, Gaz glanced up from her Gameslave, and glanced at Tak in confusion. “My favorite fic was updated!” Tak smiled, “Nice. I’ll read it with you!” Gaz proclaimed. 

Tak and Gaz started reading the chapter, everything seemed fine at first, until the chapter took an angsty turn.

By the end, Tak was on the verge of tears, and began banging her fingers against her keyboard.

THIS CHAPTER FUCKED ME UP SO BAD OMG!!! I WAS NEARLY CRYING BY THE END OF IT OMG!!  MOMO WTF?! YOU’RE SUCH A GOOD WRITER OMG!! She typed before posting the comment. 

Zim meanwhile was snuggling with Dib, when he received a notification about a comment that its beloved mutual, Kit._.Kat._.Krumbz had left. 

KitKat had recently changed her user name, from KitKat_Sausage to Kit._.Kat._.Krumbz. 

“YES!!! I HAVE SUCCEEDED!!!” Zim cheered upon reading the comment, soon typing out a response.

Dib couldn’t help but giggle before them and Zim went to bed, “Night Fishboy.” Zim purred, kissing xyr boyfriend goodnight, “Good night, bed bug.” Dib purred back, returning the gesture.

The two looked down at Seven, who was in between them, “Good night Sev.” They said in unison before falling sleep. 

“Dibby. What the hell is this??” Zim questioned as the song played, “Some weird song Sasquatch sent me.” Dib answered.

“Weird.” Zim commented, sipping his monster energy drink.

“What musical should we see?” Tenn asked, glaring at the two with big eyes through the video screen.

“Hm… that’s a good question… maybe that one musical about garagemen in space?” Dib jokingly suggested.

Tenn flicked their antennae in confusion, a gasp escaped Keef’s mouth. “YOU KNOW ABOUT VIA GALACTIA!-“ Keef gasped, “Yes!” Dib smiled.

“What the hell is a “Via Galactia” Zim asked, “It was this obscure musical from the early 1970s about garbage men in space. It only ran for 7 performances.” Dib answered.

“Weird.” Zim remarked, “How about let’s go see that “Little Shop Of Horrors” one that Keef never shuts up about?” Zim suggested.

“Nah. I’m kind of getting sick of that one-“ Keef frowned, “Maybe Wicked instead” he suggested.

“Yeah. That sounds good.” Everyone agreed in unison.

Soon, they had arrived in New York, getting ready to head to Broadway Road to go see Wicked.

Zim was wearing some fancy ass sparkly pink suit, the same one he saved Dib from Devon in. With a bunch of kandi bracelets and a kandi bag. All of which he made himself.

Dib was wearing some old suit he had gotten from a thrift store, he had repaired it using fabric patches.

Gaz and Tak were wearing gothic dress, Tenn was wearing a black dress with colorful paint splatters and a hot pink blazer, and Keef was wearing a baby blue suit. Skoodge was just wearing some out of season Christmas pajamas.

“Skoodge. Why are you wearing Christmas pajamas???? It’s April.” Dib questioned, “I dunno-“ Skoodge answered. 

Dib had dressed up Seven in a cute little fancy suit.

Soon, the group showed up at the theater, heading inside to get tickets.

“8 tickets for Wicked please.”

“That’ll be 24 bucks.” 

Dib handed the ticket seller the cash before him and the others headed to the auditorium, OH MY IRK!! SHE’S GREEN! JUST LIKE ME!” Zim squealed in excitement as he held the pamphlet in his hands, receiving weird looks from pedestrians standing in the room.

“Yeah! Her name is Elphaba!” Keef smiled, “That’s a weird name.” Zim commented, “Says the guy who’s literally named Zim.” Tak remarked.

“Shut it Tak. You have a “weird” name too. Actually, almost all of us have “weird” names…. Well. Except for Keef.” Dib replied. 

“Nah. I’d consider mine weird because of the way it’s spelled. My Dad is bad at spelling.” Keef began, “It’s spelled K-E-E-F instead of K-E-I-T-H” Keef spelled out. 

Dib spat out their drink, “Wait what? I didn’t know that.” They said before taking a seat.

Soon enough, the show began. Zim was very invested, his eyes glued to the stage the entire time. The others were enjoying themselves quite a bit.

Once the show was over, the group left and headed outside, and walked around a bit.

“Should we head to Coney Island before we go back home?” Dib asked, “You mean the restaurant? I thought that was only a Detroit and Michigan thing?” Keef questioned, “Nah. I mean the actual place.” Dib clarified, “Sure. Why not. I’ve just got to figure out the navigation and stuff.” Zim answered.

Soon enough, Zim had figured out the navigation and the group headed to Coney Island, having the time of their lives.

The group got some more hot dogs before they left for the trip home, eating hot dogs on the way back.

“We’re returning from our trip in our favorite piece of shit! Zooming through stop signs! We’re all gonna die!” Everyone jokingly sang in unison as they headed home.

Some hours later, the group had arrived back i Detroit, driving back home.

Professor Membrane and Clembrane were standing in the front lawn, “Where the hell did you go?! We were worried sick!” Professor Membrane demanded.

“We went on a road trip.” Dib answered as he dragged his suitcase behind him, “Oh. Well you’ve got to tell us next time. We were very close to calling the cops.” Professor Membrane scolded, “Yes Dad.” Dib grumbled with a nod as he headed inside.

Dib and Zim headed upstairs with Seven, unpacking.

Dib glanced at Zim, “Hey. Can we talk for a second?” He asked, Zim responded with a nod.

“How are we going to care for Seven when we start school again? How are we going to balance our studies and taking care of Seven?”

“We’ll figure something out, I just know it. We always do.”

And that’s a promise 

Zim then glancing up Dib and Seven reassuringly, with a smile. 

Ten Years Later:

Dib was now 23, but he acted more like a grumpy old man in his 50’s than a 23 year old. Well, that’s what most people would think. If you actually knew him, you’d know that he’s actually just a nice guy, just one who’s been through a lot. 

They had gotten married to Zim at the young age of 18, something the two had been dreaming about since they had gotten together at the young age of 12.  

The two could still remember that chaotic wedding they had, with Gir as the DJ, Mimi as the priest, Seven as the flower child, dancing to Vampire Money by My Chemical Romance of all songs. The gothic suit Dib wore, and that goofy white and black wedding dress Zim made himself. How they recreated the Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge album cover. It was a day they definitely wouldn’t forget. 

And, Dib was still their stinky goth boy self. (Okay, maybe not necessarily stinky, he actually smelled like New Spice Ocean Reef Deodorant but you get the idea.)

Zim was also now 23, and actually acted like someone his age. He was still his sassy and flamboyant self, and still always teasing Dib, (out of affection, of course.). He was still his scene king self, and never outgrew its alt phase, just like Dib and the others. You still could find it blasting the likes of S3rl, Millionaires, Blink 182, My Chemical Romance, also Kesha and similar stuff.

Dib achieved their dream of becoming a paranormal investigator. Now owning an institution of their own, for paranormal studies. Despite being a paranormal being themself. 

And, they were still a member of The Swollen Eyeballs after all these years.

Zim was Dib’s sidekick when it came to paranormal investigation. As well, he didn’t want a career in fast food. Not after the hell he had been through on the planet known as Foodcourtia. 

Dib and Zim had been nicknamed, “The in real life Ghostbusters of Detroit” by some locals and others, not knowing that the two were also paranormal beings themselves. A siren and an alien. 

And well… Dib was also now known as “The Fishman of Detroit.” An unknown someone had seen him swimming when he was 17, and a creepy looking photo of him in his siren form was leaked, and even made it onto an episode of his favorite show, Mysterious Mysteries. 

Which was somehow still airing after all these years. No one knowing of his true identity. Well. Other than Zim, Gaz and the others, along with Dib’s close friend, Agent Sasquatch, of course.

Dib still remembered how he felt after seeing that particular episode.

Dib lied on the couch, a sleepy Seven curled up on his chest. “Sleepy, hm?” He remarked affectionately, stroking the adorable smeet’s back. Seven let out a groan as they nuzzled Dib’s chest.

He was so glad to be finally be done with all those stupid exams.

Dib glanced over at the TV, popcorn in hand, Zim seated beside him as the episode of Mysterious Mysteries began.

The narrator began, as an image of a strange looking, fish like creature with a hair scythe on the top of its head, and with razor sharp teeth. 

Dib spat out his poop cola at the sight, “Holy shit! That’s me!” He gasped, shocked and horrified, “You’ve got to be more careful, Dibby!” Zim scolded. 

Dib had become a local legend among Detroiters. They weren’t exactly sure how to feel about that if they were being honest. 

On one hand, it was kind of cool. But on the other, it was also kind of a bad thing. What if someone found out their true identity?

Oh and, what happened to Seven you may ask? Well, Seven was now 10 years old. And had a sir unit, disguised as a tortoiseshell pointed cat, Murk. 

Raising Seven (or now, just “Sev”) at a young age was difficult for Zim and Dib, but they managed to find a way to balance the wonders and horrors of their teenage years, while also taking care of a alien baby.

They still did all the typical things that teenagers did. While still taking good care of Sev.

As teens, Sev would stay at Dib’s one day of the week, while staying at Zim’s the next, and on the weekends, Dib would either stay at Zim’s or Zim would stay at Dib’s. 

They could still go out to Jessica and Letty’s house parties (which, they had been invited to for some strange reason), while still taking very good care of their beloved smeet, with some help from Clembrane and Professor Membrane, and sometimes Gaz and Tak. 

Sev was now very into astronomy, marine biology and cryptozoology thanks to their parents, but also liked other things as well. Such as animation and filmmaking, thanks to their uncle Keef. And baking, thanks to their ancle Tenn, and uncle Skoodge. 

They were also obsessed with a show that one of Keef’s animator friends made, Cryptid Cove. Which was a show about different types of Cryptids that lived in a cove. And was something Dib and Zim enjoyed watching with them. 

Sev didn’t have too many friends, but had one who stood by their side at all times. A kid by the name of Danielle (or just Dani) Fraser. The two always did everything together, like hanging out at the mall, just like Zim, Dib and the others when they were kids. Or chilling at the park. 

Gaz and Tak had gotten married, and now made games together, and had their own indie game company. Space Hogz Inc.

The two did  programming and graphics together. 

They had just recently released a new game, about a siren meeting an alien, and them falling in love. Just like how they had 11 years ago. The game was very well received among many, critics raving about the well depicted body horror, almost as if the creators had experienced it for themselves.

And, they made music on the side, specifically Riot Grrrl music. Their band’s name was Average Human Love Pig. Inspired by the likes of Bikini Kill and Tak’s favorite band, Bratmobile.

And, they also now had a smeet of their own. Kriska, or otherwise just Ska, who was four, almost five. And was a human and Irken hybrid. Tak and Gaz had created her in Tak’s lab after realizing they wanted to be parents after spending so much time with Sev.

So, they used their dna to create Ska, who nicknamed xyrself after the punk sub genre, Ska Punk. Which, their uncle Skoodge had introduced to her. And was their favorite.

They were the opposite of Sev, rather than loud, they were quiet and typically had her nose stuck in a book. But, like her mom, Gaz, still had some anger issues. And definitely isn’t someone you want to see mad. 

And, xe also had a sir unit, disguised as a tuxedo cat, Lilith. Lilith got along nicely with Sev’s sir unit, Murk.

And, Murk and Lilith basically saw Gir and Mimi as their parental figures, which Gir and Mimi happily took the role of.

Despite being so different, Sev and Ska still got along. Even if Zim and Tak didn’t get super well.

Which, made Ska sad. Considering Zim was xyr favorite uncle (even if that’s something they refuse to admit), and that Tak was her mum. 

And for Keef, Skoodge and Tenn? Well, Keef was now a well respected animator and cartoonist despite the disapproval and disappointment from both his parents. As, they wanted him to go into medical school. However, despite his parents not being supportive of him, Meef was. He supported his sibling every chance he got.

And, he went to medical school instead. 

Keef meanwhile, saved up their money for years and managed to get into a well respected art school. Earning a degree in art and animation.

Keef then came up with a concept for a show, about a big group of friends and their crazy adventures together. Based off their own childhood, constantly hanging around Zim and the others. 

Keef then pitched his show to two networks, Animation Network and Dimeloden. Dimeloden didn’t pick up the show, but Animation Network did. The show was called, “Ada and Friendz” and was a musical, featuring music written by Keef, Gaz and Tak, along with some show runners. 

And occasionally Zim as well, who even voiced one of supporting characters on the show, the old grumpy teacher who was done with life. Mr Slinky, who was based off Keef and the other’s former teacher, Ms Bitters.  And it had just been picked up for a second season. 

Keef’s parents immediately felt bad for disapproving of Keef’s decision after they found out about the show being picked up, realizing where they messed up.

Oh? And for Tenn and Skoodge? Well, the two had become interested in baking and cooking, and went to culinary school.

Once the two had finished culinary school, the two had opened a bakery of their own like the good friends they are. T&S Bakery. They sold goods such as cookies, bagels, cakes and all that jazz. You can find pretty much anything you’re looking for there when it comes to sweets, or savory pastries. They’ve got it!

And, now Dib sat at his desk, sipping his coffee and cuddling Zim, who was seated in his lap. Zim let out loud, content purrs. And so did they. “My pretty boy.” Dib remarked, soft and affectionate. Zim started to blush. 

Sev came running to Dib’s office, throwing their backpack to the floor.

“Hi Dad! Hi Pap!” Sev greeted, running up to their parents. 

Zim snatched them and squeezed them tight, “My smeet.” Zim cooed, planting kisses all over their face. “Pap!” Sev whined out of embarrassment. Zim then let go, “How was school today?” Dib asked, “Great! We learned more about multiplying and dividing!” Sev answered.

“Nice! If you ever need help with that, ask your Pap. I can’t do math for shit-“ Dib frowned, “Yep. He’s so bad at math that when we were kids, I had to help him with his  algebra homework because our old teacher, Ms Bitters made me. And well, I’m thankful for that. Because, if it weren’t for that math tutoring, me and your Dad probably wouldn’t be together today.” Zim said, glancing up at Dib affectionately.

“Huh? Why wouldn’t you have gotten together otherwise?” Sev asked, “Well, you see Sev. Me and your Pap wanted each other dead when we were kids. We hated each other with a burning passion.” Dib began, “But, after Ms Bitters made us do math tutoring together, we began to get to know each other and became fast friends.” Dib continued, “Which escalated into the romance you know today!” Dib finished with a smile. 

“Wow. Aunt Gaz wasn’t kidding.” Sev remarked, Dib glanced at them in confusion. “So you really did wanted to do an autopsy on Pap?” Sev questioned, “Yeah. When I was a stupid 11 year old, that is.” Dib answered. 

“Yeah. And what makes that so funny is that I ended up doing an autopsy on him first.” Zim wheezed, “Okay- it wasn’t an autopsy. It was actually your Dad’s top surgery but close enough.” Zim snickered.

“Wait, Dad wasn’t bitten by a shark??” Sev gasped, “No?” Zim blinked in confusion, just as confused as Sev was. “I may or may not have told them that my chest scars were from a shark attack-“ Dib admitted awkwardly.

“You mean- Pap did your top surgery?” Sev questioned, Dib answered with a nod. “Yeah- he did it as an early birthday present two weeks before I turned 13. I was joking when I said I was bitten by a shark- I genuinely didn’t think you’d take it seriously.” Dib apologized.

“Welp. Time to tell Dani that you weren’t actually bitten by a shark.” Sev remarked, being freed from Zim’s grip and walking to grab their flip phone, which they had received as a gift from Zim. 

“Seriously Dibby.” Zim remarked, “It was a joke okay! I didn’t think they would actually take it seriously!” Dib replied, Zim just dramatically rolled its eyes.

Sev went downstairs to the break room and was on the phone with Dani, meanwhile Zim and Dib were doing some research. 

One of Dib’s employees came in to tell him something, she quietly came into Dib’s office, “Hey Mr. M. I just came here to tell you-“ she stopped in her tracks. 

She noticed her boss, whom she referred to as Mr. M sitting in his chair, with his weird husband Zim. 

Dib soon noticed her, “Oh- sorry. What did you want to tell me?” They asked, “I just wanted to tell you about a reported ghost haunting near Hiddleford Manor. That’s all.” She said, carefully placing the file on Dib’s desk.

“Thanks, me and Zim will go investigate it in a moment.” Dib said, their employee nodding before leaving the room. 

Zim and Dib got out of their chair, Dib called Gaz to let her know that Sev would have to stay over at her and Tak’s house for a bit, which was fine with her.

Sev sat at the table with Ska, who was reading a book, Sev knew not to bother them as they munched on their apple slices that their aunt Tak had just cut for them.

“Hey mum, I have a question.” Ska asked quietly, in her faint British accent. “Yes, dear?” Tak questioned, “Is it true that uncle Dib and uncle Zim used to hate each other? Sev was telling me about it.” xe asked.

“Yep. They weren’t lying. Your uncle’s wanted each other dead when they were children.” Tak began, “Why?” Ska questioned, “Well darling, uncle Zim was trying to conquer Earth. He thought it was his secret mission, but in actuality, the tallest sent him to Earth because they hated him and didn’t want to deal with it. So, they sent it to a place they knew nothing about.” Tak explained. 

“Yeah, but why did they hate each other?” Ska asked, “Uncle Dib hated uncle Zim because he was trying to destroy the planet. And uncle Zim hated uncle Dib because he got in the way of its mission.” Tak informed.

“Yeah, but how did they fall in love? And who are the Tallest?” Ska questioned.

“Your uncle’s fell in love because of their algebra math homework. I wish I was joking.” Tak answered, “and, the Tallest were the leaders on Irk back when me and uncle Zim were kids. They were assholes.”  She adds.

“Wow. How you and mom fall in love?” Ska asked, even more curious now. 

“Well, before hand we tolerated each other, before I came to your mom, I was only there to get my ship back… but then it escalated into us hanging out. And we became fast friends. And later on caught feelings for each other and had our first date at Bloaty’s.” Tak explained.

“Is that why mom likes that place so much?” Ska questioned, “Maybe?? But probably also because she grew up eating there.” Tak answered, placing a glass of cold juice on the table. 

“Hey Aunt Tak. How come deodorant for girls always have names like “Green Tea Diabetes” or like “Strawberry Sunset” but then deodorant for men always have names like “Untamed Gorilla” and “Bear Armpits?” Sev asked.

Tak wheezed, “No idea” she answered with a laugh, putting some things away.

Once Ska and Sev were finished eating, they watched some television before they both headed to bed.

Some hours later, Zim and Dib came back to get Sev.

Dib walked inside Gaz and Tak’s house, and was greeted by Gaz. “Hey. Sev’s sleeping upstairs in the guest room.” She said, Dib thanked her before they both headed upstairs.

There they saw a snoozing Sev, Dib carefully picked them up and held them in their arms, “Aren’t they just precious?” Zim whispered lovingly, receiving a shh in response from Dib, as they didn’t want to awake Sev.

Soon, the two drove back home with Sev in the backseat, gently placing them in their bed, tucking them in and giving them a kiss goodnight before quietly leaving the room.

Zim and Dib headed to their to get dressed, Dib put on his huge night shirt and socks, and Zim put on his fancy nightgown and took his wig and contacts off.

Dib climbed into bed, patting the area on his chest as an invention for Zim to join him. “Come here Spaceboy.” They smiled softly, Zim soon joining them in bed, snuggle up on their chest.

Zim wrapped its arms around Dib, Dib returned the gesture as the two turned on their sides, Zim burying its head into the crook of Dib’s neck.

“Goodnight, Bed Bug.”

“Goodnight, Dib-fish.”

The two then exchanged I love you’s and a kiss before drifting off to sleep.

A Year Later:

Sev came home from school, they were now able to walk home from school alone now that they were 11.

 

Sev walked inside, throwing their backpack on the floor, strangely, their aunt Gaz was sitting on the couch, same with aunt Tak, ancle Tenn, uncle Skoodge and uncle Keef.

 

“What’s going on?” They asked, “Go upstairs, you’ll see.” Gaz said, Sev raised their eyebrow but went upstairs.

 

They went to their parent’s room, only to see their parents lying in bed. Their Pap was lying in bed undisguised, and their Dad was in siren form.

 

“Is this what aunt Gaz wanted me to see?” Sev questioned, not understanding.

 

“No.. but we have a little surprise.” Zim smiled, Dib uncurled his tail, revealing a small baby siren and irken hybrid, kind of like Ska.

 

“Well Sev, this is your little sister!” Dib smiled nervously, not sure how Sev would feel about such a sudden change.

 

Sev wandered closer, “Where did you get her from?” They asked, “We created her in the laboratory. Just like how your aunts created Ska.” Dib answered, “Kind of like how smeets were created back on Irk.” Zim adds.

 

“Does she have a name?” Sev asked, “Yes! She does!” Zim smiled, “It’s… Zim Jr.” Dib sighed, “Seriously.” Sev said, wishing their Dad was joking, “Your Pap insisted. It was not my idea. I wanted to name her Delilah actually… so we just made that her middle name.” Dib replied.

 

“That’s what I wanted to name you. But your Dad wouldn’t let me.” Zim said, “Well. I’m glad you let him name me.” Sev replied.

 

“Would you like to hold her?” Dib asked, “Sure.” Sev answered with a smile, gently picking up the baby.

 

“Be careful. She’s very fragile.” Dib advised, Sev nodded.

 

Sev gently held their newborn little sister in their arms, she let out purrs, “Aw. I think she likes you, Sev.” Dib smiled, Sev laidback in bed with their parents, snuggling up towards Dib.

 

Dib pulled both his kids close, “My babies.” He purred, “I’m 11, Dad.” Sev retorted, “You’ll always be my baby, whether you like it or not.” Dib smiled softly.

 

The four cuddled for good bit, before they headed downstairs and let the others meet the new addition.

 

It’d been a few years since Zim Jr was born, (Well actually, created. But close enough.) and, she had decided that she didn’t really like her name, and wanted to change it.

 

She was about 6, and Sev was 16, almost 17.

 

She glanced up at her older sibling, “Hey Sev. Can I tell you something?” She asked, “Yeah. Go ahead.” Sev said, “I don’t like my name. I want to change it to something else.” She admitted, “Okay then. Anything you had in mind?” They asked, “I like Vela… it means Sail in Italian.. and it’s also the name of a star constellation.” She answered.

 

“Alright then, Vela.” Sev smiled, Vela felt a sense of joy at her chosen name being used, “How about we tell Dad and Pap? I’m sure they’ll be nice about it.” Sev suggested, receiving a nod in approval from Vela in response.

 

Vela and Sev walked to the living room, where their parents were sitting, “Hey kids. What’s up?” Zim asked, “So like. Zim Jr doesn’t like her name and wanted to change it to Vela.” Sev answered, “Okay then. That’s fine.” Dib smiled, Zim nodded in agreement.

 

“See. I told you that was a stupid name.” Dib said as they faced Zim. “You know how bad Pap is at names. I mean… He named Minimoose, Minimoose.” Vela said with an eye roll.

 

“Yep.” Sev agreed, “You’ve got to get better at names, Zim.” Was all Dib said before they got off the couch to get a drink from the fridge.

 

Many More Years Later: 

Zim was an old man now, he was in his late 60s. Dib had died a few months ago of old age.

He was heartbroken at his beloved lover’s death. His world was in shambles, the one thing its universe revolved around was gone.

It had become depressed without its Dib-fish.

Zim sat on the sand, staring at it with a frown.

“Oh Dib-thing… I miss you so much.” Zim frowned as a tear rolled down its cheek.

Dib lurked in the water, he was now a ghost siren, his scales now glowed in the dark, with shades of green bioluminescence. 

His body now shimmered with shades of blue. 

He would still get legs when on land though, becoming the ordinary ghost. 

Dib frowned, perhaps I should surprise xem… I hate seeing xem like this… They decided, floating out of the water and floating toward the land.

They floated toward Zim, curling their tail around their beloved Irken.

“Hey.” He said, trying to get Zim’s attention, unsure if it would even work. Zim’s antennae perked up, xe glanced beside xem, seeing a familiar face, with a familiar smile.

Dib’s. 

Zim began to tear up, but not due to pain or sorrow, rather, of joy. “D-Dib-thing? Is that you?” He questioned with a stammer, not believing his eyes. “Of course it’s me, love bug.” Dib purred, his eyes filled with love.

“Oh get over here, Fishboy!” Zim cried joyfully, the two wrapping their arms around each other, Dib felt cold to the touch, “Damn Fishboy. You’re cold.” Zim remarked with a giggle, “Yeah- Sorry Spaceboy. Ghosts are like that-“ Dib giggled back. 

The two giggled just like they did when they young for a good while, Dib stared into Zim’s eyes, “Would you like a kiss?” He asked, eyes filled with love. “Oh yes please, Dib-love!” Zim replied. 

Dib gently kissed Zim, Zim returned the gesture, “Do you… want to go home with me?” Zim asked, “Yes please.” Dib answered, kissing his husband once more.

Zim now walked home, no longer alone, now with its beloved Fishboy beside him.

Not longer after, Zim joined Dib as a ghost. The two now haunted Detroit’s Salty Crab Sands beach, guiding children away from unsafe water, Dib basically becoming the local ghost lifeguard.

The two were now known as Fishman’s Ghost / Dib, the former Cryptid Hunter Ghost. And Zim was now known as The Ghost Alien Of Salty Crab / Zim, The Other Former Cryptid Hunter Ghost. 

And, the two were perfectly content with it. Now spending their days, wandering the city of Detroit, together. Same with the others as well.

The End, Farewell and Goodnight