Archive of Our Own ^beta

1. 

“We should get married!” Pac blurted out, breaking the relative silence of Fit’s living room.  The two were watching reruns of some trashy reality show as they ate take out on the stained second-hand couch Fit had found in the alley out behind the apartment building when he moved in.

Fit sputtered, “What!?” almost spitting out the rice in his mouth.

Pac turned to face him, “No, you said that you get a big bonus for having a spouse right?  I’m sure you could use the money.”  He gestured around him, at the water damaged walls and cracked concrete around them, “Maybe you could move out of this shitty apartment you’ve been in since college.”

“Hey!” Fit scowled, “It's not that bad, may I remind you of that apartment you and Mike were in when I met you?  I thought you two were going to die of diseases or something.”

Pac rolled his eyes, “There was only one family of rats in the actual apartment, and we got them all their shots!  And we just got out of prison, so finding a place was kind of hard-”

“Don't use the felon card on me, and please don’t defend the ratinhos right now-”

“Still sad we couldn’t take them with us when we moved out-” Pac cut himself off, “No think about it Fit!  It's a win-win situation,”

Fit raised an eyebrow, “Really?  What’s in it for you?”

“You getting a higher salary isn’t the only benefit that comes with marriage, Fit.  I could really use your health insurance.  With Mike leaving to go to school, I can’t use his plan anymore.”

Fit frowned, “I didn’t know that health insurance was something that was an issue for you-”

Pac just waved him off, “No no, don’t worry about it, I knew I’d figure it out, and this could be a solution.  I want a cut of the bonus money too though.”  Pac grinned.

Fit thought on it for a few seconds.  He’d been hesitant at first, but having the extra couple hundred dollars a month could be a big deal, and if it would save Pac from being uninsured -something that Fit hadn’t realized was a looming issue- Fit figured it would probably be worth it. 

“Okay, I’m down, we split my bonus fifty-fifty, you get in on my health insurance, and we get married.”

Pac grinned, extending a hand, “Sounds like a deal fiance.”

Fit smiled back, taking Pac’s hand in his own and giving it a firm shake.

For all intents and purposes, the actual marriage part hadn’t been all that hard to achieve.  A few forms printed out from the courthouse’s website, an appointment booked over the phone, and Fit and Pac were standing in front of a judge in a courthouse, slipping cheap rings they’d bought from a pawn shop down the street from Pac’s apartment over each other's fingers.  They recited the vows at the judge’s prompting, sweaty palms clutched together.

Fit was almost worried that someone would figure them out.  Someone would stand up and point at Fit, shouting that he wasn’t really in love with Pac, and they were doing several levels of marriage fraud.

No one said anything though, and Fit figured they’d made it this far.

“I now pronounce you married, you may kiss your husband.”  The judge didn’t even look up from the papers on his desk, signing on one line and stamping another.

Fit froze.  He kind of forgot about the kissing part of weddings.  He looked at Pac, eyes widening as he saw the man moving forward.  He tried to ignore the sniggering from Phil behind him as he stiffened.  Pac let go of one of Fit’s hands, gently cupping his cheek as he pressed a soft peck to his lips.  Fit pulled himself out of his stupor in time to kiss back at the very end, bringing his now empty hand up to rest against Pac’s waist as the other pulled back.

“Congratulations, on your union, here’s your paperwork, you should receive an official marriage license in the mail at the address you put on the form in about two weeks.”

Fit nodded, still reeling a little from having to kiss Pac unexpectedly, thankful for the other man for grabbing the papers from the judge.

“Thank you sir!”  Pac tugged Fit out of the room, hands still clasped, Phil following the two out.  As soon as they were back out in the sunshine Pac turned to Fit, finally letting go of his hand.  The cool air against his sweaty palm sent a chill up his spine, “I’ll see you later, I have to be at work in like half an hour, bye marido!”  He started walking backwards, waving as he went, “Bye Phil!”

Fit watched him turn around the building before facing Phil, the blond man wearing an amused smirk, the corners of his lips twitching.

Fit huffed, “What?”

“Nothing,” Phil shook his head, still smiling, “that was just really fucking gay y’know?”

“Phillll,” Fit dragged out his name, “you know that it's just for the money,”  the two started to make their way down the street to where Fit was parked, “If I’d known you were going to be an asshole about it I would have asked Charlie to be a witness or something.”

Phil just shook his head again, “No, no, don’t worry about me.  Just teasing.”  He bumped his hip into Fits, “So… you have any plans with your new husband tonight?”

“Phil,” Fit just groaned out again, dragging his hand down his face as he did so, noticing the metal of his new ring brushing the skin as he did so.

2. 

Telling people hadn’t even been that hard either.  With the exception of their closest friends -who knew the truth about their bonus money-health insurance scheme- everyone else in Fit’s life was safely under the impression that he and Pac had been together for a little while, and had gotten married.  Fit was happy to let them believe the reason nobody had ever heard about it was because Fit kept his personal life very private.

(He was of the opinion that his private life was nobody’s fucking business.)

At work things didn’t change much.  He got a few congratulations after he submitted the paperwork to Human Resources, the gossip obviously spreading quickly through the office, but other than the fact that the deposits into his bank account every two weeks were a bit more substantial, and he was transferring part of it to Pac, nothing about his actual job changed.  He still felt chained to the goddamned cubicle, typing away at finance spreadsheets for hours, slaving away at the desk from nine to five.

He was lucky that he’d mentioned Pac before, because that had done a lot to sell the story to his coworkers.  The first day, he’d heard ‘I didn’t realize you and Pac were together,’ from people who didn’t know the Brazilian and those that did.  Even Roier, whose husband had been roommates with Pac just after they got out of prison, bought it.  He had to thank the guy though, his boasting about his pay raise after getting married to Cellbit had been what swung this plan into action in the first place.

All in all, the first year of their marriage went by pretty smoothly.  Fit was saving up for a new place, and (with heavy coaxing from Fit) Pac had been convinced to see a new prosthetist, and he had a new leg ordered, currently in the process of being manufactured for him, and mostly covered by Fit’s insurance, with the leftover costs being more than made up for with his cut of the marriage bonus money.

“Hey marido, I have the food!”  The door to Fit’s apartment slammed as Fit pulled out the plates from the cabinet.

“In the kitchen!” He called, setting the plates on the counter and placing a pair of chopsticks next to each of them.  He grabbed two beers from the fridge as Pac came into the room, setting the bag of takeout on the counter, pulling out the containers.

“I got curry and drunken noodles!” He set the two dishes on the counter along with the container with rice.

“Oh nice,” Fit sat down on one of the barstools as he popped the top off of the beer bottles one at a time, setting one in front of Pac, and taking a swig of his own.  He used one of the big spoons he’d set out to scoop some rice and curry onto his plate while Pac plated himself some of the drunken noodles, then they switched.

They were fairly quiet the first few minutes they ate, both eager to dig into the Thai food after a long day at work for both of them, but eventually Pac spoke up.

“How was work today?”

Fit shrugged, picking up a bell pepper and some rice with his chopsticks, “Oh y’know, just the usual, boring paperwork and spreadsheets.  I do have some fofoca though.”

“Oooo,” Pac grinned, turning to face Fit more, “you know I love some good fofoca Fit.” He scooped some rice and curry into his mouth and motioned for Fit to continue.

“Alright,” Fit said, pausing to take another bite and chew, “So, you remember how Roier was coparenting with Jaiden before he and Cellbit got married?”  Pac nodded, keeping quiet so Fit could continue, “Well, turns out the kid, who’s named Bobby, got suspended from school for pranking the staff toilets.”

“No way,” Pac giggled, “how did they know it was him?”

Fit shrugged, taking another sip of beer, “I’m not sure, all I know though is that a teacher was covered in glitter, and the bathroom is closed for cleaning for a week.”

“How old is this kid?”

“He’s in first grade so like six or something, I have no clue how he pulled it off,” Fit replied.

Pac shook his head as he chewed, “Wow, well, if he’s spending any time with Cellbit, he must’ve had his genius rub off on him.”

Fit smiled, “I guess so.  Apparently he had an accomplice, but I’m not sure how old that kid was too.”  He took another bite of the noodles and turned to face Pac as well, “Do you have any fofoca from work, mister scientist man?”

Pac just shook his head, “I’ve told you Fit, I just help with the paperwork, you know I’m not an actual scientist, you need to have a degree for that.”  Pac straightened, “That’s actually kind of what the news I have is about though.  My boss had me talk with him today, he said the notes I’ve been leaving with files are really helpful, and that he thinks I should be working a higher position than I am.  He said the company has a program where they pay for their employees to go to college, it's usually used for their scientists who already have a degree to go to grad school, but he said they’re willing to pay for me to get an engineering degree if I want to, and I’ll come back as an entry level engineer, which already makes a ton more money than I’m making now.”

Fit’s eyes widened, “Pac oh my god!  That’s an amazing opportunity.  Do you think you’re going to do it?”  Fit knew how hard of a time Pac had had over the years trying to get a job without a college degree and with his felony record.  He and Mike had gone to prison when they were 20 and 18 respectively, and it was almost five years later that they’d been released.  They’d tried their best to get back to a normal life, with Pac starting working immediately to support the two of them, while Mike enrolled in classes at the community college, working part time while he was in school, before transferring to a university almost a year ago.  Mike was doing fairly well in bouncing back, but Pac had to struggle through more than a few hurdles in the past few years.

Pac was silent for several moments before answering, “I’m not sure Fit.  I really want to, becoming an engineer would be my dream, and I can really see myself working with this company for a long time, the work they’re doing on prosthetics is really amazing.”

“I can sense a ‘but’ there though.”

Pac sighed, “Yeah.  But, while I am in school, I’d switch to a part time position.  I have enough to make rent and pay for everything now, but I don’t know if I would with a lower salary.  And I hardly have anything saved too, I just spent so much money on a new leg, so I don’t know if I’d even be able to do it.”  Pac took another bite, thinking as he chewed, “I told him I’d think about it.  I wouldn’t start classes until the fall anyways, and it’s only May, so I have some time.”

Fit nodded as he listened, “Look, man, it sounds like this is something you really want to do, you’re just being held back by money stuff.  I say take the opportunity, you know you’re going to regret it if you don’t.  If the money for rent and stuff really becomes an issue, I’m more than happy to help. I have a bit saved up for a new apartment, but keeping you in yours is a bigger priority.”

Pac sighed again, “Are you sure?  I wouldn’t want you to spend that money you’ve been saving so long on me.”

“Nah,” Fit shook his head, “don’t worry about that.  We’re husbands remember, what’s mine is yours.”  He grinned.  Fit wasn’t sure what possessed him to reach over, but he did, fingers squeezing around Pac’s hand on the countertop.  Fit wore his ring in his right hand because of his prosthesis, so the glint of their wedding bands shone together in the soft lighting of the kitchen as he squeezed.  “Anything you need Pac, I’ve got you.”

“You’re too good to me Fit,”  Pac flipped his hand so he could lace his fingers with Pac’s.

Fit shook his head, “Nah, it’s what friends are for.”

They sat in silence for a few beats before Fit pulled away to grab his chopsticks again, and Pac spoke up, “No, it’s what husbands are for.”

The two started laughing, and Fit couldn’t help but feel hopeful for the future to come.

3. 

It was hard to say when the usual friendly, brief touches -a side hug, a clap on the back, a fist bump- had evolved to lingering contact between Pac and Fit.

Fit was never one for physical affection.  Maybe it was the way he grew up, but he’d never had much desire to express his  feelings or affection  through physical contact.  It had always felt so forced, sure a hug or two here or there was nice, but when it came to more than that it felt so awkward.  Even with old partners it felt off.  Cuddling was almost suffocating at times, and he’d never understood the people that said they could kiss someone for hours.  A few pecks was alright, but making out with the few women he’d dated in college had always felt like a chore at best, and mildly gross at worst.

With Pac though it was easy.  Maybe it was the fact that they’d known each other for so long before they’d started to be more physically affectionate that made it easier.  Either way, at some point, lingering hugs when they left each other’s apartments became normal.  It was little more than an afterthought to squeeze close to the Brazilian when they sat on the couch together.  Fit didn’t feel like he had to stay conscious of every part of his body when they watched a movie together, bodies leaning into each other.

That was where they were now, pressed close to each other to share a blanket as A New Hope played on the TV.  The popcorn had long been eaten, and while Fit would say that he enjoyed Star Wars, especially the original trilogy, he’d had a frustrating day at work, his boss seemingly mad at every little thing everybody did, and he was drained.  As the characters on screen fought their way out of a trash compactor, Fit felt his head drooping down to rest on Pac’s shoulder.

The other man shifted a little, and Fit shot back up, muttering a soft “Sorry,” as he did so.

“No, no,” Pac said softly, gently pulling Fit’s head back down, “just moving to make it more comfortable.”

“Oh,” Fit nodded, letting himself relax, “thanks.”

The movie went on for another few minutes and Fit felt his eyes drooping more and more, his blinks getting longer.  He let out a loud yawn and tried to blink his eyes back open.

“You can sleep if you want to, I’m sure you’re tired.” Pac offered, “You can stay the night, I’m sure you’re too tired to catch the bus home.”

Fit nodded, “Oh, yeah, thank you.”  He yawned again, shifting to take off his prosthesis and set it on the coffee table, settling back into Pac’s shoulder to get comfortable.

It was warm, under the blanket and pressed up against someone else, but it was nice, giving Fit a soft sense of comfort as he relaxed a little more.

Pac wrapped an arm around Fit’s shoulder, pulling them down so they were more horizontal on the couch, Fit practically laying on top of Pac’s chest, his head pillowed on the other man’s shoulder.

“Boa noite, sleep well marido,” Pac dropped a small peck to the top of Fit’s head.

If Fit had been a little more awake, maybe the gesture would have surprised him, but half asleep and warm, Fit just returned the affection, pressing his lips to the junction of Pac’s shoulder and neck that was exposed by the collar of his shirt before settling back into his chest.

“Boa noite Pac.”

4. 

“What do you think about having kids?”  Pac asked, breaking the silence between them as he spotted Fit’s bench press. 

Fit finished his last two reps before speaking as he sat back up, “What do you mean?  I’ve never really thought about it.” Fit smirked, “You aren’t pregnant are you Pac?  I can’t believe you would be disloyal to your husband like this,” he joked.

Pac just rolled his eyes, moving around to take Fit’s place on the bench, “No Fit, I’m not pregnant, I just was curious.  Cellbit and Roier just adopted a son, remember?  I was wondering if you’ve ever thought about if you want kids or not.”

Fit shrugged, “I don’t know.  I’ve never thought about it, I’ve never really been in a position where kids were something that might accidentally happen y’know.”  He thought about it for a bit as Pac did his reps.  Fit helped him place the bar back on the rack as he spoke up again, “I don’t know if I’d be a good dad, it’s not like I had the best examples of what great parents look like.”

Pac hummed as he and Fit swapped places again, “I think you’d be a great dad Fit!  You care a lot, and you’re a way better cook than I am, so you already have that one covered.”

“If you say so Pac,” Fit lied back on the bench.

“I’ve always loved kids,” Pac started as Fit pulled the bar up for his first rep, “maybe it was growing up in the orphanage, but I think I’d really like being a dad.”  He shrugged, “There’s a lot of kids out there who need a dad.”  The conversation about kids ended with their workout as Fit finished his last set and got up.  

The two walked over to their belongings, Pac taking a long drink of water before handing the bottle off to Fit to take his own drink.  

The next time the topic of kids came up, Fit was driving Pac back home, having taken the other man to pick up some books from the library to help study for his finals.

“I didn’t know there was an adoption center here.”

Fit turned to see where Pac was pointing out of the window, a small sign on the building at the corner they were stopped at reading “Oak Street Adoption Center.”  Fit just hummed, “Huh, I don’t realize either.”

“I want to adopt kids someday, give them the family I never had.”

The two were quiet as the light turned green, and the car pulled away from the center. 

It was two more blocks before Fit finally spoke again, “We could adopt a kid.”

Pac spun around to look at Fit, “What!”

“What do you mean?  We’re already married, I’m sure it’s not that difficult to adopt a child.”

Pac was quiet for a moment, “I thought you didn’t want kids?”

Fit shrugged, “It’s not that I don’t want them, I’m just worried I’m going to fuck it up.  If I did it with you, well theres no way you’d let me fuck it up.”

“You’d be a good dad Fit.  I don’t think you’d need me to tell you what to do.”

It was a whirlwind from there.  Turns out there was more to adopting a kid than either Fit or Pac thought.  Apparently it was considered best for the couple to be living together, which Fit supposed made sense. 

It was a strangely easy decision to make.  With Fit desperate to get out of his apartment, and Pac feeling the strain of rent on his pocket each month even more now that he’d started school again, it made sense to find an apartment together, even before factoring in the adoption thing.

They’d lucked out too, a three bedroom apartment in the slightly nicer area of the city, only a block away from a bus stop Fit could take to work, and a 4 minute walk from a train station Pac could take to classes and his work.

Somehow things were falling into place, and around a year since the first conversation Pac and Fit had had about kids, a social worker was coming to do a house inspection and interview.

It wasn’t until the social worker was on their way though that it really hit Fit what they were doing.

He and his best friend, who he happened to have married nearly three years earlier for monetary reasons, were going to adopt a child together.  As friends.

And they had to make sure this social worker thought they were the picture of marital stability, and mentally ready to take care of a child.  While pretending to be in love.  Easy right?

The doorbell rang and Pac opened it, greeting the social worker with a smile, “Hi, I’m Pac, you must be Lauren.”

The woman nodded, shaking Pac’s offered hand, “Yes, it’s nice to meet you,” she turned to Fit, who was standing slightly behind Pac, “You must be his husband, Fit was it?”

Fit nodded, extending an arm to shake, “Yes, Fit, nice to meet you,”

After being invited in, the social worker went around the apartment, checking outlets and anything that could pose a danger to kids.  She was thorough, spending extra time in what was set to be the kid’s bedroom.

Fit had almost slipped up at one point, when Lauren had asked about the sleeping arrangements.  Fit had forgotten that in order to play the role of the happily married couple, they were sharing a room, but luckily Pac had caught him before he could blow their cover, commenting that Pac’s room, the master bedroom, was where they slept, while Fit’s room was the spare bedroom-slash-office.  The lie worked pretty well, as Fit’s room was less decorated, and had a computer in it.

After a few questions about their experience with children and what had made them want to adopt (both of which had heartstring tugging answers from Pac, and answers that attempted to seem in support of his husband from Fit) Lauren was leaving, telling them that she would email them with information soon, seeing as their inspection and interview went well.

As soon as the door shut behind her, Fit had an armful of Pac, the Brazilian giggling into Fit’s ear.

“Fitche, oh my god,” He pulled back and planted a big kiss on Fit’s cheek, “We’re going to adopt a kid!  We’re going to be dads!” He pulled back to spin around the living room.

Fit couldn’t help but join in laughing, Pac’s excitement contagious, “Hell yeah we are!  And we’re going to be the best goddamn dads ever!”

Pac giggled again, rushing forward to squeeze Fit into another hug, “Do you think so?”

Fit nodded, pressing a quick kiss to Pac’s hair, “I know we are Pac, you especially, there’s no way this kid doesn’t love you.”

Pac sighed, relaxing into Fit’s arms, “Thank you,” he breathed out, “you’re too good to me Fit.”

“Do you think he’s going to like me?”  Pac chattered nervously in the passenger’s seat of the car.

Fit rolled his eyes affectionately, “Pac, I don’t see how he couldn’t like you, the email we got said he loves machines, and he wants to be an engineer when he grows up.  I don’t think you could find a better kid to get along with if you tried.”

“You really think so?” Pac asked.

“I know so,” Fit replied, “Just relax, we’re almost there.”

They were on their way to the adoption agency they’d passed almost a year earlier, to meet with a boy named Ramón who was eight.

Pac had been adamant that he didn’t care who they were matched with.  He didn’t care how old they were, or how long they’d been waiting to be adopted, or even if they’d had problems.  He and Mike had been problem kids when they were in the orphanage, and Pac wanted to make sure that even the kids like him could have a family.

That’s how they’d gotten paired with Ramón.  According to the emails they’d gotten, he’d been in the system for about three years, since his dad abandoned him when he was almost five.  Pac teared up when he’d read his file, and hearing about what the boy had gone through in his young life had filled Fit with an anger on his behalf that he hadn’t felt in a long time.

Fit tried to keep a brave face despite his nerves as they pulled into the parking lot, trying to act as a grounding force for Pac.

Fit parked, and they were walking into the adoption center.  Pac grabbed Fit’s hand as they talked to the man behind the front desk, and Fit gave it a squeeze, trying to comfort his friend.

They checked in at the front desk, and then they were led through a door, into a playroom, where there was a small, brown-haired boy wearing a backpack playing with legos by the window.

Pac was the first one to walk over, sitting down across the table and waving, “Hi I’m Pac!  I don’t know if you’ve heard about me, but it’s nice to meet you.”  He held out a hand to shake, which Ramón took cautiously.

“I’m Ramón.”

Pac smiled, “Hi Ramón!  I’m glad to meet you”, he turned his body slightly to point at Fit, who walked over to stand behind his friend, waving, “This is Fit, we’re going to be taking care of you if that’s something you’d be okay with.”

Ramón glanced at the adoption center worker who stood by the door, then between Pac and Fit, seemingly trying to judge their sincerity, “Like, take me home with you?”

Fit nodded, “We’ve already got a room set up for you back at our apartment.”

He looked up at them with a small smile, grabbing a small stuffed animal from the floor, “Okay,” Ramon reached out a hand to grab Pac’s, clutching the stuffed toy to his chest.

5. 

It was family movie night when Pac got the call from Cellbit, something that had become a routine for Friday nights in the few months since they adopted Ramón.

He’d slipped out of the room quietly, leaving Fit and Ramón to continue watching Nemo together.  It hadn’t seemed like anything out of the ordinary, Pac got calls from Cellbit all the time, and though this one was a bit late at night, Fit knew Cellbit didn’t have the most regular sleep schedule. 

After a few minutes though, Pac came back into the living room with a concerned look on his face, crutch under one arm because he’d already taken his leg off for the night.  He motioned for Fit to follow him back to the kitchen.

When Fit entered the room, Pac was worrying his lip between his teeth, “What happened?”

Pac sighed sharply, “Cellbit has apparently been working on a missing person’s case, a seven year old who just stopped showing up to school.  The parent never filed a report, but teachers got concerned and called the police, who got Cellbit involved.  They found the kid, but because it’s so late they need a place for him to stay the night, and he asked if we could take him for the night, because we’re still licensed as foster parents from when we adopted Ramón.”

Fit nodded as he listened, “Of course we can take him, are they not able to find anyone?”

“Yeah,” Pac nodded, “They said it’s really late and they can’t find anyone to take him on short notice.  You’re okay with us taking him?”

“Yes, of course!”

“Okay, just wanted to check before I said yes.” Pac typed quickly on his phone, likely messaging Cellbit back an affirmative.  He looked up, “We should go tell Ramón right?”

Fit nodded, and the two headed back to the living room, Fit grabbing the remote and pausing the movie.

“Hey Ramón, we want to talk with you for a second,” Pac said as he sat down on the couch.

Fit noticed the look of panic that briefly passed over Ramón’s face, and rushed to reassure him, “Don’t worry, nothing is wrong, we just wanted to let you know that someone is going to be staying with us for the night.”

Fit turned to Pac for the other man to continue, “His name is Richarlyson and he’s seven, he needs a place to stay for a bit, before he is moved to a foster home.”

Ramón nodded, “He’s in foster care?”

“He will be, it's just short notice right now, and because me and Fit have a license to be foster parents, we’re able to take care of him for the night.”

“Okay, do you know what he likes?” Ramón asked, and Pac shook his head.

“I’m not sure, but I’m sure he’d love to tell you.”

Ramón smiled, “Okay!  Wait- where is he going to sleep?”

Pac and Fit looked at each other, before Fit spoke up, “He can take my bed and I’ll sleep on the couch, I don’t want him sleeping on a couch.”

Pac nodded, “Okay, but I could take the couch if you want, you can sleep in my bed.”

Fit shook his head, going to protest before Ramón spoke up, “You could just share Pac’s bed, it's huge!”

Fit turned to Pac, shrugging, “I’m okay with it if you are,”

“Yeah,” Pac nodded, face appearing to turn pink in the dim light of the living room, “that will work,”

“I’ll go change the sheets on my bed then,” Fit stood up, pressing play on the movie again before heading to the hall closet.  

It was a whirlwind of forty-five minutes before there was a knock at the door, Fit changing the sheets on his bed, moving his work computer, his bag, and some clothes into Pac’s bedroom, while Pac and Ramón gathered some of the boy’s stuffed animals to put on the bed, and got out clean towels for the bathroom.

Pac, who had just finished putting his leg back on, rushed to answer the door, Fit and Ramón following close behind.

When he threw open the door, Cellbit was standing there along with a slightly frazzled man who was holding hands with a small boy.  The boy had close cropped dark curly hair that looked to be covered in dirt.  The dirt was similarly smeared down his clothes and skin.  When Fit’s gaze lowered to the boy’s legs, he noticed a prosthesis on the boy’s right leg.

Pac crouched down immediately, getting on Richarlyson’s level, “Hi, I’m Pac, you must be Richarlyson.”

The boy nodded, “Yeah,”

“This is Fit, and our son Ramón, it’s nice to meet you,” Fit and Ramón both waved, and the three people waiting in the hallway stepped into the room.

The man who was with Cellbit spoke up, “Could I speak to one of you?”

Pac nodded, shooting Fit a look and gesturing with his head to Richarlyson, “Yeah, come with me.”  He led the social worker towards the back of the apartment, while Fit took Ramón and Richarlyson to the kitchen.

“So, are you hungry for anything, we have some snacks in the cabinet, or I can heat you up some leftovers from our dinner earlier?”

Richarlyson nodded, “What leftovers?”

Fit opened the fridge, pulling out a tupperware, “It’s pasta with red sauce and some chicken.”  When the boy nodded, Fit placed the container in the microwave, heating it up.  Once it was done, he led Richarlyson, who was already talking with Ramón, to the dining room table, setting the pasta down with a fork, “Don’t worry about finishing all of it, eat as much as you want, and if you’re still hungry after, we can get some snacks out.”

He stepped back, catching Cellbit’s eye.

“I’m going to head out now, it looks like you have everything covered,” the other man said, and Fit nodded.

“Of course, head home and get some rest man, we’ll talk with you soon.”  Cellbit nodded and waved as he left the apartment, shutting the door behind him.

After a few minutes, Pac came out with the social worker, who also left, and came over to talk with Fit.

“He said he’ll call tomorrow with information about where they’re going to place Richarlyson, and I said we’re all set for tonight.”

Fit nodded, “Sounds good.  I got him some food, and we should try and get him to take a shower or something before he goes to sleep.”

“Good idea.  I’ll get my stool from my shower and bring it into the hall bathroom.”

Fit nodded, and Pac retreated back down the hall again.  He zoned out for a few moments, returning when Ramon tugged on his shirt.

“Fit, Fit, Richas is done.”

Fit turned to the younger boy who was still sitting at the table, the empty tupperware set in front of him.

Fit walked over, grabbing the dish and fork, and bringing them over to the sink, “You still hungry bud?”

“No,” came from the other side of the room, and Fit walked back over after setting the dishes in the sink.

“Okay, do you think you want to take a shower before you head to bed?”

Richarlyson looked down at his clothes as he got up from his chair, “Yeah, but I don’t have any clean clothes to change into.”

“Oh, well you can borrow some of Ramón’s, they might be a little bit big, but I’m sure he has something that fits.”

Ramón nodded, “Yeah, come, you can pick something out,” the older boy reached out for Richarlyson’s hand, tugging the younger towards his room.

“Bring him to the bathroom when you’re done Ramón!” Fit called after them.

“Okay!” Ramón replied.

“So this is the stool I use when I shower.  It makes it so I don’t have to sit on the edge or hop around.”

Richarlyson nodded, watching with wide eyed awe that had been painted clear across his face since he saw that Pac also had a prosthetic leg.

“And here is a pair of crutches, they should be small enough for you,” He held them up to Richarlyson’s sides, “yeah, that looks good enough for the short term- you can use these so you don’t have to put your leg back on after you shower and you’re all wet.”

Richarlyson nodded, “Yeah, that’s really annoying.”

Pac set the crutches against the wall within reach of the shower.

“Okay, your towel is here, and your pajamas are here, do you need help with anything or do you want to do it by yourself?”

“I can do it by myself,”

Pac nodded, grabbing Fit’s arm and pushing him towards the door, “Alright then, we’ll be in the living room when you’re done, take as long as you need!” He shut the door behind them.

It was another hour before both of the kids were in bed, and Fit and Pac were able to get ready for sleep themselves.

“I forgot what the first night with a kid is like, it's a lot.” Fit remarked, pulling off his prosthesis as Pac came out of the bathroom from changing.  Fit had already changed into his pajamas, and was sitting on Pac’s bed.

Pac sat down on the bed, facing away from Fit as set his own crutch near the bed, next to his leg, then scooted his way onto the bed, “Yeah, we got through it pretty well, we can switch the laundry over in the morning so his clothes are clean when he leaves.”

Fit nodded, “Sounds good,” and leaned over to shut off the lamp on his side of the bed, “Boa noite husband.”

“Good night, meu bem,” Pac turned off his own light and the two settled into the bed together.  It was a little odd, sleeping in a bed with another person.  While Ramón wasn’t wrong in saying that Pac’s bed was large, he and Pac were still close enough that Fit could feel the heat of his body behind him.  Thinking about it, the last time Fit had slept in a bed with another person was when he was with his last girlfriend, over five years earlier.  He remembers she was particularly clingy, and he'd always wake up sweaty from the body heat of her grabbing onto him in the night.  They hadn’t lasted very long anyways, her getting annoyed at Fit’s lack of affection, but it wasn’t Fit’s fault that she seemed to want to kiss him all the time, something that Fit wasn’t the biggest fan of.

Fit pushed the thoughts away, relaxing into the pillow as he tried to get rest for what was sure to be an eventful day tomorrow.

+ 1

What was supposed to be a night with Richarlyson turned into two days, then three, then a week as they failed to find someone who was able to take care of a seven year old amputee with arising mental health issues caused by his parents.

At the two week point, Fit and Pac sat down with Ramón while Richarlyson was at his first therapy appointment, and decided together to take Richarlyson in as long term foster parents.

And it had worked out, Fit and Pac were certainly qualified to deal with the issues that came with being an amputee, and had been able to help Richas with the whole process of ordering a new prosthesis.

That wasn’t to say it had been easy though, in the six months since they had started fostering him it had been a whirlwind, getting him enrolled in school, managing having a new kid suddenly right as Pac was moving to a full time position as an engineer after graduating college.

Fit barely had time to work out most days, and had definitely been neglecting his friendships other than Pac, so when Phil asked if he was down for coffee one morning he thankfully had off, he eagerly accepted.

“Hey mate!  Glad to see you again, I feel like it’s been ages.”  Phil said, sitting down across from Fit, coffee in hand.

Fit nodded, taking a sip from his own coffee before responding, “It really has.”  Save for school drop off and pickup, Fit and Phil had barely talked since Richas became a more permanent presence in their house.

“Yup, you’re too busy being a dad and living out domestic bliss,”

Fit raised an eyebrow, “Domestic bliss?  I’ve been getting a traumatized foster kid situated in our house and used to his new routine of physical therapy and therapy therapy and school.”

Phil raised his hands in surrender, “Woah!  No need to get so defensive man, it sounds like you two are doing just fine, finally confessed your love for him have you?”

“What!”  Fit let out a loud laugh, “Are you joking?  I’m not in love with Pac, we’re just roommates you know,”

Phil raised an eyebrow, “Roommates who are married.”

“For the monetary benefits and health insurance,”

“And have two kids together?”

“Pac wanted to be a dad!  And it's way easier to adopt kids as a couple.  And we didn’t even mean to foster Richas, he just needed a home and we were a good option.”

“You sleep in the same bed.”

“Well I had my own room until Richas started living with us, I didn’t want to make Ramón switch his bedroom situation so soon after fixing it up in the first place.”

“Fit, you share a bed .”

“Like I said, it used to be Pac’s bed, and I had to move in so Richas could have mine.”

“You could have bought another bed Fit.”

Fit threw his hand up, “I don’t know what you want from me, is my platonic marriage not normal enough for you?”

Phil scoffed, “Please, I’ve seen the way you look at each other, there is nothing platonic about that.  And you call each other little pet names, like a couple.”

“They aren’t pet names, I just call him my husband, as like, a joke,”

“He calls you something in Portuguese though,” Phil leaned back in his chair, sipping his coffee.

“Yeah, marido, which means husband.”

Phil shook his head, “No, he says something else too, like mi something”

“Meu bem,” Fit said automatically, hearing the affectionate nickname almost as much as his name these days, “it uh, it means like ‘my dear’ I think?  Not quite sure.”

Phil gave Fit an unimpressed look, “That’s literally a pet name.  And I have definitely heard him call you ‘amor’ Fit, and even I know what that means.”

Fit rolled his eyes, “I don’t know what you’re trying to say here Phil.”

Phil just shook his head again, “I’m saying you’re in gay love with your husband Fit.”

Fit scoffed, “There’s no way, I’m straight.”

Phil burst out laughing before seeing the look on Fit’s face and quickly sobering, “Oh you’re serious, um, wow, I thought you knew, but I guess not.  Wow.”

“Thought I knew what?”

“That you’re gay.”

Fit’s eyes widened, “What?  Phil, you know I’ve only dated women in the past, you know that, you met them.”

“Yeah,” Phil squinted, “but every time you talked about your old girlfriends, you sounded borderline disgusted to show any romantic affection to them, or have them show you any.  I thought you were aromantic for a while, but then Pac happened, and you’re fucking whipped for that man.”

Fit was quiet for a few moments, trying to think.  Phil’s statement had left his mind completely blank, trying to wrap itself around what the blond man had said.  “I- uh-” he tried to say something but no words came out.

Luckily Phil noticed his state, and changed the subject to Chayenne’s latest culinary feat.  Phil liked to tease, but he wasn’t an asshole.

Somehow, Fit wasn’t able to stop thinking about what Phil said.

He wasn’t gay, was he?

He knew the whole married to a man thing was pretty telling, but he and Pac had never gotten married for romantic reasons, just financial benefit.  It would have been one thing if it stayed like that, but Fit had to admit, it had definitely gone beyond that.  Co-parenting, living together, sharing a bed.

He hadn’t realized that last one was a little strange for platonic friends until he thought about it, especially when the two were more often than not waking up wrapped around each other, faces squished into shoulders, chests, necks.  He’d always brushed it off as a consequence of the cooling temperatures drawing them together but now?  Now he wasn’t so sure.

He didn’t realize how romantic some of the things he and Pac did were until somebody pointed it out.

When he came home from coffee, Pac had greeted him with an, “Oi marido!  Welcome back,” from the kitchen.

When Fit joined him in the kitchen to help with dinner, he’d wrapped an arm around Pac’s shoulders, the Brazilian leaning up to plant a kiss on his cheek before refocusing on the pan in front of him.  Without thinking about it, Fit had dropped a kiss of his own onto the side of Pac’s head before letting go, moving to finish chopping the vegetables that were half diced on the cutting board.

And it kept happening.  Gestures of affection that were easy, second nature for the two became more difficult to ignore.  A kiss on the cheek, a hand caressing down an arm, a brush of a palm down a spine, just to say hi.

In the three days since Fit went for coffee with Phil, he had kissed Pac -whether on the forehead, cheek, hair- eight times.  Pac had kissed him fifteen times.  Not that Fit was counting or anything.

It took three days (and fifteen kisses from Pac) for Fit to realize Phil was right.

Fit might be a little bit gay.

The way he felt around Pac was like nothing he had felt before.  It was nothing like the easy affection he felt for his friends, Phil, Tubbo, or the protective love he felt for Ramón and Richas even if the latter had only been in his care for a few months.

It was a mix of those, but it was also more, it was easy, and warm, but it was also too-much, overwhelming and all consuming, and it was eating at Fit’s brain with every day that passed.

Fit finally decided to do something about it on Thursday, four days after he’d seen Phil.  It was that weird period of the day, where Fit and Pac had just returned from work, but were completely alone at home, Richas at physical therapy and Ramón at robotics club at school.  

Somehow it felt like too important of a thing to say on a random Thursday.  Pac deserved something special, a nice dinner, some flowers, maybe a couple candles and a romantic song in the bathroom.  He deserved something as special as him.

But Fit didn’t think he’d be able to stay sane long enough to plan something like that.  He needed Pac to know how he felt as soon as possible.  The hour without kids in the house seemed to be the perfect opportunity.

Fit walked in the door from work, approaching Pac where he sat on the couch, reading something on his laptop, leg propped against the coffee table.  He shut the lid as he noticed Fit waking into the room.

“Minha vida!  Hi!”  He sat up straighter, patting the couch next to him for Fit to sit.

Fit slipped off his shoes, setting his bag down next to them and taking a seat on the couch.  

“I have something I need to tell you,” Fit said, looking at Pac.  The Brazilian’s eyebrows furrowed, worry passing over his face and Fit rushed to reassure him, “Nothing bad I promise, just something I haven’t been able to get out of my head you know?”

Fit opened his mouth to continue, but he found the words stuck in his throat.  He stood up, starting to pace back and forth between the couch and the TV.

“Fit?  Are you sure it isn’t something bad?”

“No, no,” Fit shook his head, “I- I just have to figure out the right words to say.”

Fit looked up, staring into Pac’s eyes, admiring the shine in his dark irises, the pools of brown holding tiny universes Fit could get lost in for millennia.

He decided to keep it simple, to the point, “I love you Pac,”

Pac’s face brightened, and he smiled as he said, “Awe, meu bem!  I love you too!”

That was not the answer he was expecting.  Fit shook his head, “No, no I- I’m in love with you Pac, I- eu te amo.”  He said the phrase in Portuguese, hoping that maybe Pac would understand what he meant.  Pac’s eyebrows furrowed, and he got a very perplexed look on his face.

“I- uh, was that not a given?  I- I thought we were in love?”

It was Fit’s turn to be confused now, “Huh?  I, I mean, I think I’ve been in love with you for a long time, but I only just realized a few days ago.”

Pac sat up straighter, and Fit was getting worried, “A few days ago!  Fitche, I’ve been in love with you since you encouraged me to go to university.”

Fit’s eyes widened, no longer concerned about Pac returning his feelings, “Pac, that’s- that was like four years ago.”

Pac nodded, “I think I started thinking we were together together  around the time we first talked about kids.”

“I- I had no idea.”  Fit sat back on the couch, “I was having a bit of a crisis the past few days, realizing all the stuff we do that’s romantic, and I guess what you’ve been doing has been romantic the whole time.”

Pac nodded, “I can’t believe you didn’t know, we share a bed Fit!”

“Well we didn’t the first year we lived together, how did that not ring any alarm bells.”

Pac shrugged, “I just thought you were nervous about physical touch, you’ve always been a big fan of personal space.”

Fit shrugged, he supposed that was true.  Fit couldn’t help but realize how shitty the past few years must’ve been for Pac though, “Wait I was such an asshole, I was the worst husband Pac!  You thought we were together and I didn’t even kiss you, or take you on dates, anything like that!”

Pac smiled, “We go on dates, what do you think our Thai food dinners are?  We go to the movies just the two of us a bunch too.  And we kiss on the cheek all the time, sure it got a little odd after the first year or so, but I thought you were just shy with affection.  You always blush at the smallest things, Fitche!”

Fit shook his head, “No I don’t, what are you talking about?” 

Pac leaned forward, teasing smirk on his face as he gently grabbed Fit’s chin in his hands, turning Fit’s face to look at him, “I don’t know Fitche, you’re looking pretty red to me.”  He leaned in closed, pressing a long kiss to Fit’s cheek.  Fit was sure the skin there was burning hot under Pac’s lips.

Fit couldn’t help but wonder what Pac’s lips would feel against his own.  Pac pulled back, though still close enough that Fit could feel the puff of the other’s breath against his skin.  Pac slid his hand around to cradle Fit’s jaw, and the American let his gaze drop to Pac’s lips, “Can- can I kiss you?”  The question came out a lot more breathless than he expected, but Pac was still nodding rapidly in response.

“Yes, yes, amor, Fitche, marido, you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for you to kiss me.”

Fit smiled, bringing his own hand up to tangle in Pac’s hair, leaning in closer until their lips touched.

It wasn’t really fireworks like everyone said; if Fit had to describe it, he would say it was like warmth, honey-golden sunsets and the feeling of coming home after a long day.  Kissing Pac was comfort, and kissing Pac was home.  Pac’s thumb caressed Fit’s cheek, and he might have died right there.  Fit ran his hand through Pac’s hair, fingernails scratching slightly at his scalp in the way he knew his husband liked, reveling in the soft hum he let out, the noise vibrating against their joined lips.

It could have been minutes or hours before they pulled back, lazy smiles across their lips, eyes half lidded, and cheeks dusted with pink.  They weren’t apart for very long though.  Fit wasn’t sure who leaned in again, but suddenly they were kissing again through smiles that felt like they were going to burst, five years of marriage, five years of big complicated feelings finally, finally getting to be heard.

They pulled back again, foreheads resting against each other as they just breathed.  Fit scratched along Pac’s scalp again, and Pac continued to gently rub his thumb back and forth along Fit’s cheek.

Fit finally opened his eyes, only to be met with dark brown ones full of joy.  He giggled, leaning forward to press a quick peck to Pac’s lips.  Pac giggled too, and they kissed between laughs for a few minutes more before Pac leaned against the back of the couch, head tilting sideways.

“Meu deus we’re idiots aren’t we.”

Fit laughed, loud and happy, leaning further into Pac to press his face into the junction of his shoulder and neck, pressing a soft kiss there as he whispered, “Eu te amo Pac.  Darling.”

He felt Pac place a kiss against his head, “Eu te amo também minha vida.”

Fit smiled, relaxing further into Pac’s embrace before he remembered their kids that they probably needed to pick up soon.

He pulled back, looking at his watch, eyes widening.  Ramón’s robotics club was over in twenty minutes, and Richas’ PT was over in thirty-five.  

Pac saw Fit’s panic and looked at his own watch, eyes widening as well.  He shot up, wobbling a bit as he reached for his prosthesis and liner, running a hand through his hair, “You get Ramón, and I’ll get Richas?”

Fit nodded, standing as well, “Sounds good.”  He walked over to slide on his shoes, grabbing his wallet, house keys, and phone from the table, shoving them into his pockets as he headed to the door.

“Fit wait!”

Fit turned to Pac, who was slipping a shoe over the foot of his prosthesis.  Pac stood, walking the few steps towards him, cupping his face gently between his hands and giving him a quick peck on his lips.  It reminded him of the soft kiss they’d shared at their wedding, a kiss Fit hadn’t thought about in a long time.  Fit smiled, feeling his cheeks heat up, “Okay, let's go get the kids, we’ll talk more tonight right?”

Fit nodded, bringing his flesh hand down to intertwine his fingers with Pac’s and they left the house, walking down to the train station to pick up their sons.