Work Text:
Garak could've said many things about deep space nine, a good portion of them negative, but a profound positive was the near total soundproofing of his quarters. He had total peace and quiet. People rarely buzzed his quarters, especially if they knew it was his. He was undisturbed nearly all of the time.
But, one night when he should've been in bed, Garak was reading a book on his couch, unaware of the time, simply enjoying the novel. The writer was quite descriptive, so much that Garak could see the setting in his mind, could see every feature of the character the story was currently focusing on.
At first, he didn't even register it. Sound had ceased to phase him, because there wasn't supposed to be any sound. But Garak found himself startled, and he looked up from his book. He heard it; a door chime.
At this hour? Outside of his quarters? He was intrigued.
He set his book down on his coffee table, staring up at the door. "Come in."
The doors slowly hissed open, some of the station's cooler air instantly rushing in, but that didn't matter as much as the man who awkwardly stepped through the doors.
Bashir's face was a mix of emotions, his eyes shining, even in the somewhat dim lights of his quarters. When he met Garak's eye, he noticed his hesitant hands, trying to find a comfortable way to rest them at his sides, and he saw an ever so slight tremble in his lip.
"I'm.. I'm sorry, it's late, I shouldn't be bothering you like this." Julian immediately apologized, his head hanging while his cheeks heated up.
"I told you to come in, did I not?" Garak reminded him, more and more intrigued by the second.
"Well, um.. you didn't know who it was." Julian pointed out, but Garak just shook his head.
"You seem to think a stranger would be more welcome than you. I assure you, my dear doctor, you didn't disturb me. Please, come in."
Julian hesitated for a moment, but Garak's welcoming smile beckoned him closer. He slowly walked further into the room, towards Garak's couch. He eyed the young man the whole way, trying to determine what was the matter. Obviously, there was something. He settled down on the other end of the couch, leaving an empty cushion between him and Garak.
Garak inched a little closer to him, closely watching how he reacted. He seemed to welcome the closeness, but was frozen in place. Garak suspected it was something to do with his earlier comment - he felt like he was a bother, like he was intruding.
"How much do you know about me, Garak?" Julian quietly asked, his eyes trailing around his quarters.
"More than you realize." Garak answered, as truthfully as he could.
"How much do you know about my- my parents?" He tried to keep his tone neutral, but Garak could hear the quiver in his voice.
So that was why he was upset. Memories, maybe, or they had contacted him. Garak couldn't think of a good answer, so he simply reached over and gently put his hand on top of Julian's. "Would you like to talk about it?" He offered, quite genuinely.
"No.. er, maybe, I.. I'm sorry. Really sorry. I should just go." He tried to get up, but Garak wouldn't let him. He tugged him back down by the arm, rougher than he intended to. He then realized it wasn't such a good idea when he noticed that the shininess in Julian's eyes had finally broken into tears.
"I'm terribly sorry, dear.. did I hurt you?" He asked, turning all his attention toward Julian.
"No.." he softly said, his voice near a whisper. "You didn't." Julian refused to look him in the eye, but Garak could see the tears streaming down his face.
Garak gently put his arm around Julian's shoulders, not pulling or pushing, and he allowed the young man to fall further into him, until his head rested on his stomach and his body was curled up around his thighs. He was quietly crying, unable to speak, so Garak just smoothed a hand through his hair, silently assuring him that he was safe.
"You can stay here tonight, if you want to. I'd be delighted to have you." Garak meant it - it wasn't a big deal, especially because Julian had slept in his bed before. But usually, that had only been after they had collapsed into eachother, messy and exhausted from their preferred evening activities. He knew Julian's body very intimately and could pick him apart piece by piece, if the occasion called for it.
Garak wasn't good in these types of situations, as most of his training was in effective torture, rather than comfort. Julian didn't seem to mind simply resting there in his lap, comforted by the weight of his hands, although Garak couldn't imagine why. It was nice to have his young man resting on him, even so.
"My parents always told me.. not to overstay my welcome. Like I was a burden to anyone else. Like I was going to.. ruin somebody's day if I asked them for help." Julian shook his head, tears dripping down his face. "They complain about everything. They make everything about themselves. They hardly care for me, they're disappointed in me because I didn't.. I didn't follow what they wanted, and I just.." his voice was starting to break, his breathing erratic and shaky. "I just want them to be proud of me. Or to.. to care for once. To think of me instead of their own selfish disappointment.." he couldn't speak, after that, quietly gasping for breath while he cried.
"Doctor.." Garak cupped his cheek in hand, tenderly wiping his tears away with his thumb. "I'm very proud of you. You've made a wonderful career for yourself here, with wonderful people who are proud to call you their friend. You do wonderful things every single day, and you are loved."
Julian sobbed, so Garak allowed him to wipe his tears on his pant leg. He rolled over, but Garak was too big to put his arms around, so he simply grabbed hold of his arm and held on. Garak could see the red in his eyes, how they were swollen from crying, tears streaming down his cheeks. He was still upset, but he was slowly calming down, coming back to reason.
"May I kiss you, dear?" Garak asked, sensing that Julian needed some kind of reassurance, something to grasp on to. He nodded in response, so Garak helped him sit up, maneuvering him to straddle his lap with his hands bracing himself on his sides. He slowly brought Julian in, guiding his trembling lips into the kiss, being sweet and patient with him.
He gradually stopped shaking and simply let himself lean on Garak's chest, melting into his lips, letting the older man's hands guide and caress him. He felt safe there, as silly as the idea of being safe in the arms of a Cardassian spy was. Garak cared for him. He was loved.
"Can we, um.. can we go to bed? Is that okay?" Julian pulled back to ask, still a little apprehensive about being a bother.
"Of course, my dear doctor. Are you alright?" Garak gently touched Julian's face, stroking his thumb across his pretty cheek.
"I.. I think so, yes." He answered, closing his eyes into Garak's touch. "Thank you."
Garak put his hand on Julian's chest and gave him a gentle push back towards the floor. He would've picked Julian up and carried him, but he couldn't get up with the young man straddling his lap like that. Julian stood up, and when Garak stood up, too, he grabbed his hand and held on. It wasn't terribly often that Julian was so physically affectionate, but Garak welcomed it, if it would help him.
"You're so good to me, Garak.. is there something I can do to be good to you?" Julian had the slightest smirk on his face when he said the words, but his eyes were still swollen, his cheeks still tear stained. Garak squeezed his hand.
"Tomorrow, doctor. I believe it would be in your best interest to take a sick day."
Julian softly smiled, allowing Garak to lead him to his bedroom. He couldn't think of a response, so he kissed Garak on the corner of his lip, just a little sloppily. "I trust you."
Garak snickered, bringing Julian in closer to him. "Foolish mistake, my dear."