Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“She’s stabilizing. Vitals are green.”

“Is she awake?”

“She might be conscious soon.”

Ow.

Consciousness was greeted with pain and suffering.

Agony was so persistent it blocked out all other sensation. It was overwhelming. making it impossible to even try to think. It was unbearable, infecting her muscles, tugging at her joints, drilling into her bones. It smothered her like an evil blanket, far too tight and too heavy and too warm to be comfortable beneath. But it was the worst in her head. It felt like her brain was being forced against her skull, pressing against the back of her eyes, squeezing it against the inside of her skull. It was like a balloon so full of air it might pop. It was pure agony.

Ow.

Himiko Toga let out a wheezing rasp of a whimper, barely stirring as she woke. She moved to rub her eyes, but her arms caught on something hard, clattering against her wrists and making her wince in pain. Her body already felt like it was falling apart- it didn’t need any external help.

She tried to take a deep breath, but even her lungs were working against her, hardly able to do anything more than take short, painful gasps of fresh air. The air itself was painful, chilly and thick, it filled her lungs and seemed to tear its way through. It dug itself into her lungs and almost refused to leave until halfway through her exhale.

Himiko was forced to do nothing but lie and wait. Heartbeat after heartbeat. Breath after breath. She wanted to cry, but she didn’t have the energy for it. She wanted to adjust herself in bed, but moving was an impossible task. Minutes felt like hours as she waited for the world to cut her a break.

The pain didn’t exactly start to fade, but she was slowly becoming aware of other sensations. At first they were only added to the vague, oppressive ache tugging at her body, but after what felt like hours she slowly became able to identify them. There was an odd weight against her face, pressing against her mouth and nose. It was warm and sort of humid- an odd contrast from the cool, thick air she was breathing. There was a constant, low buzzing sound that seemed to come from the sky itself, interrupted every other second by an obnoxious, loud, steady beeping coming from somewhere behind her. There was a soreness in her arms, with a familiar tightness of her skin that felt pinchy and punitive. She could feel a thin sheen of sweat against her skin. And even worse, there was an itch behind her ear she could already tell would be impossible to scratch.

Time ticked by, with its only indication being the continuous beep coming from behind her. She had to regain herself. She had to fight. She couldn’t just slip away like this, lost to whatever sleepy darkness was itching to reclaim her. She started with her name. Himiko Toga. 被身子 渡我. She’d memorized the characters years ago, often filling the blank spaces around them with flowers or birds or kitten ears. The pen strokes were ingrained in her muscle memory as deeply as her route home from school. Her name was Himiko Toga. And she was alive.

Slowly, she gathered the energy to open her eyes just a crack. She was immediately blinded by bright, white fluorescent lights and was forced to close them again, whining weakly at the discourteous assault. They were the culprit behind the buzzing that was aggravating her migraine, bathing the room she was in with their sanitized, oppressive white light.

More time passed before she tried again, light pouring through her lashes so aggressively she thought she could feel it. She didn't run from it this time, instead letting the light overwhelm her as much as the rest of the pain in her body. It took minutes to adjust, and even then she could only open her eyes so far before they began to sting. She tried to use her hands to create some shade, but her wrists could hardly even clear her shoulders before clanging against the same cool metal a second time. Himiko blinked a few times, forcing her eyes to adjust to the world around her. Dark shapes slowly solidified into sanitized looking furniture- all an unnatural white in the bright light of the room. 

“She’s awake! She’s awake!”

The world took its time coming into focus, clearly in less of a rush than she was in. With it, were two faces she hadn’t exactly expected to see.

Ochako-chan, and Izuku-kun.

They were standing at the side of her bed, with Izuku resting a comforting hand on Ochako’s shoulder. He was looking expectantly down into Himiko’s pale gold eyes with an excited expression on his face. He was sporting an odd haircut, with the dark green hair on the left side of his head shorter than the rest. He was also covered in a few scars Himiko couldn’t remember him having- and she’d made a point of committing his scars to memory.

Ochako was… different. She looked like she hadn’t slept in days. She looked exhausted, and even worse… those wide brown eyes Himiko had seen in her dreams could only meet her own gaze for a second before they were cast down on the floor.

Was this a dream? Could she be in so much pain during a dream? Could electronic beeping be so annoying in a dream?

Himiko reached out to the two, hoping beyond hope they’d take her hand. Ochako’s eyes quickly darted from the floor, to Himiko’s hand, then to her gaze finally. She started to reach out before… she pulled her hand back. Like a child that’d been told they had to wait until after dinner for a cookie. Like someone who’d been scolded. Or worse, someone who hadn’t meant to reach out at all.

Instead, Izuku was the one who reached for her hand. Ever the optimist, ever the charmer, ever the most honest person Himiko had ever known. Himiko was desperate for someone to take her hand. Anyone. But that eager darkness was already tugging her back down. It had its hold on her and was whispering sweet nothings in her ear that nothing- not even Izuku’s excitable looking face- could silence.

Nothing except for that damn beeping. That was speeding up.

“Her heart rate!”

“She’s crashing!”

“Toga-san!”

Himiko Toga was in a lot of pain, and very, very sleepy. Her consciousness slipped from her grasp like blood through her fingers before Izuku ever had the chance to take her hand…

Himiko had never been a fan of hospitals. The constant, loud beeping, the acrid scents, the poking and prodding. Plus, she’d never had the most pleasant experiences around blood until… well… Not to mention most of her Quirk Counseling sessions had taken place in a hospital setting as well, and the association of those places with the disapproving scowl of the psychiatrists and panicked rejection from her parents was fairly strong. She avoided hospitals as often as she could, and hadn’t been to one in… years? Certainly not since before she’d run away from home.

Not before she’d decided to live life in a way that made her happy.

She opened her eyes, first one, then the other. Things felt… odd. Like they weren’t doing their job right. She closed them, and tried again. Her left eye seemed normal! Her right… the world came in dim and blurry, like peering through a dirty window during a rainstorm. Even focusing on the tile ceiling above her was challenging, but she fought to do it anyway. The room around her was spinning, and she could hear the not so faint frantic chatter from nearby doctors. She didn’t care about any of that…

How had she ended up in a hospital?

She tried to take a deep breath, but her lungs ached as she did so. That was when she noticed the mask against her face. The soft weight and humid warmth she’d felt before had been the oxygen mask secured against her, feeding her cool breaths of air and fogged up a little as she breathed out. She turned her head slightly and finally understood the sore tightness in her arms had been because of the half dozen IV drips in her. The annoying beeping had been coming from her heart monitor. The clanging she felt whenever she moved her arms were the metal handcuffs chaining her to the hospital bed.

Handcuffs?

A small dam seemed to burst, and memories started to flood into her mind. The war. The battle. The way she’d dragged Izuku with her as she’d been pushed through a warp gate. She’d been desperate to confess her love to him, hoping beyond hope that he’d accept her feelings and maybe even go on a date? She remembered how nervous he’d looked when he’d asked for clarification, as if no one had ever confessed to him before. She remembered how disappointed she’d felt when he’d declined… Was it really that silly for a girl to hope the boy she had a crush on might return her feelings?

Himiko remembered how even Ochako had rejected her. She remembered how they’d fought in some home she’d hid away in. She remembered how the younger girl had promised that she’d stop her. And she remembered the way she’d dug her knife into Ochako’s stomach. She remembered the blood- so much blood. She’d wanted to hurt Ochako so badly. Why did she get to live a normal life, with the cutest boy on the planet, while Himiko got nothing but rejection at every turn? Her parents, her friends, her crushes… 

She’d hated everything about the heroes. But… that wasn’t entirely the truth.

Not at all. She held strong feelings for them both, but they weren’t entirely hatred. In fact… they hadn’t been hatred at all. But thinking about all of that now was exhausting. She couldn’t dwell on it- not when there was a swarm of bees in her head and a hand squeezing her heart.

Could she even be sure most of those memories were real? Or had it all been a dream? Or had some been a dream and she’d never be able to sort through what’d actually happened without help?

She tried to sit up, but the moment she began to move her headache throbbed with a vengeance, bringing her back down to the thin mattress. Her head was spinning, her throat was dry, and she felt the intense need to barf even though she was positive there was nothing in her stomach. She was kind of stuck for the time being, anyway.

She let her eyes wander around the room. Izuku and Ochako were sitting on the far side of the room. Izuku looked like he’d just woken up from a nap, while Ochako looked like she still hadn’t even tried to sleep. The moment her pale gold gaze met Ochako’s soft brown, the heroine looked down at the floor, incapable of meeting her eyes any longer. Himiko frowned and continued to look around the room instead. Round, sanitized looking furniture. Medical equipment she’d never cared to learn the names of. Behind a glass wall sat a girl, roughly her age with odd pink hair and yellow eyes. She was speaking in English with another girl who was clearly a foreigner. This one had long blonde hair, blue eyes and glasses. Finally, there was an old lady that Himiko somewhat recognized as the elderly hero, Recovery Girl.

Her mind was slow and foggy, but she was gradually able to piece together more and more of her current situation. She must’ve survived her fight with Ochako. Looking down at the younger girl, covered in blood, Himiko had decided that she’d give up her own life for the life of someone she loved. She’d give Ochako a second chance, after the younger girl had pushed herself to the brink of death to extend a hand to her. She’d sacrificed herself with a blood transfusion, fully expecting to die in Ochako’s place. Instead… she’d survived. And now she was here…

But why? Why was she here at all? Who had gone through the trouble of keeping her alive? And for what reason?

Himiko took a breath to speak and immediately fell into a coughing fit. Her throat was dry and her voice had hardly been more than a rasp. Each cough was incredibly weak, and it felt like the only fluid in her mouth was the blood she could taste at the back of her throat. She tried to reach to cover her mouth, but her wrists caught on the handcuffs again.

Right.

Izuku was the first to move, quickly walking to the sink, grabbing a cup and turning the water on. Ochako was right behind him, opening a drawer and grabbing a bright pink plastic straw before putting it in the cup. Himiko could just barely make out a whispered she’s okay shared between the two. They were quick to Himiko’s side and Izuku gently removed her mask before offering her a sip.

“Take your time, Toga-san,” Izuku said. It was hard for Himiko to read his tone as anything but pity- especially with that san honorific. It made her skin itch. She didn’t need his pity. That’s not what she’d ever wanted from anyone. Especially not from him. She narrowed her eyes at him for a few moments, trying her best to discern what he was thinking. There was something so honest about him. Something so charming and hopeful about him. It was impossible to honestly believe he had any ill intention. After a few moments, she took a small breath before taking a sip of the offered water. Even at room temperature, it burned her throat. It felt as if her entire mouth and throat were dehydrated. Another sip and she had to pull away to cough. She could taste even more blood at the back of her throat.

“Uraraka-san and I are glad you’re okay. We were really worried about you,” he said as he pulled the styrofoam cup away from her lips and readjusted the mask on her face to let her breathe properly again. His voice was soft and gentle despite how excited he sounded. Almost like he knew she’d had a headache. He was so kind and patient. Impossibly sweet. 

It felt unreal. Undeserved.

It took Himiko a few tries and several choked, wheezing gasps to finally get her words out.

“What… happened to Jin-kun,” Himiko hissed. Her head was spinning and her throat was hoarse, but she forced herself to speak. She had to know. Maybe- maybe he might still be…

“Twice,” Izuku asked, a bit of the excited tone he always had leaving his voice as he spoke. His shoulders dropped a bit, and his lips fell into a small frown. “He… The clones disappeared, Toga-san… He… he’s gone.” He seemed… genuinely sad about that. Even if it hadn’t exactly been his fault that Jin had been murdered. Still, it hurt to hear that she hadn’t been able to save her friend. Someone she’d cared about so deeply. Someone who had risked his life for her… He was gone. Gone forever now that she’d used up his blood. Still, she’d at least already had the time to grieve for him. It’d been weeks since Hawks had betrayed them. Speaking of that supposed hero…

“And Dabi-kun?” Her memory was a little hazy, but she was positive she’d seen a blast. An explosion. A wave of light and heat that she’d been sure had been Dabi’s final hurrah. She’d hoped he’d been able to live as he’d pleased.

“... he… he died not long after the battle,” Izuku answered, seeming to take another blow as he responded. Again, Himiko was positive he wasn’t directly responsible. She couldn’t be sure who Dabi had been fighting before his death- that day had been so chaotic- but she was sure Izuku must’ve been far away from that fight. And much closer to… Well, there was one more person she had to ask about, and she was almost positive that he’d be responsible this time.

“... and Tomura-kun?”

Izuku took a long time to answer, but his body language told Himiko everything she needed to know. His shoulders slumped, his head hung, his eyes could hardly meet hers anymore. Ochako reached out, placing a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. Wasn’t that nice.

“... I’m sorry,” he finally answered, a few tears running down his face as he met her gaze again.

Himiko looked to Ochako, hoping for her to say something more, but the younger woman still couldn’t take her eyes off the polished floor. She seemed even guiltier than Izuku looked. Himiko signaled for another sip of water, hoping to overcome the itchy dryness at the back of her throat. Izuku was quick to comply, removing her mask and letting her take a few sips before putting her mask back on for her.

“So… you killed us all… Why am I here?”

“No. Mr. Compress and Spinner are still alive! We… we tried to save everyone we could, Toga-san. I promise.” Himiko believed him. She really, truly did. Something about him gave off the impression that he was an awful liar, if he ever did lie about anything. That only made the fate of her friends hurt even worse. She hadn’t been able to save Jin. Dabi had blown himself up. And Tomura hadn’t gotten the chance to tear down the society that had failed them all so deeply. They’d lost, but losing wasn’t what was so heartbreaking. It was never having the chance to change what they’d needed to change…

They’d failed…

She looked up at the tile ceiling again, blinking a few times to try to get her eyes to focus. Her left eye was still dim and blurry, hardly even able to make out the tiling that she could see clearly with her right eye. Oh well. She thought about what that might mean. About what Spinner or Mr. Compress were doing right now. About what Dabi or Jin or Tomura or Magne might say right now. Himiko took another breath, gathering herself to speak again. Her mouth was slowly getting used to the taste of blood, and her tongue and throat didn’t hurt as much anymore.

“I asked Tomura-kun once… if he’d destroy everything.” Just getting that far pushed her into another coughing fit. Izuku offered her another sip of water, but she pushed his hand away, glaring at him and daring him to move before she was done speaking again. “He promised me… I’d get to keep what I wanted… He promised he’d let you two live… and you heroes let my friends die instead…”

That… wasn’t entirely the truth. Tomura had promised to leave some exceptions to what he’d destroy. But he hadn’t exactly agreed that those exceptions would be the same heroes who stood against them. Still, Himiko was positive that he wouldn’t go back on his promise after everything. He’d known how she felt about Izuku since she’d met him at their little summer camp, and she wouldn’t have let Ochako die after their fight… And it’s not like Tomura was here to say otherwise.

“I’m sorry, Toga-san… I couldn’t save him,” Izuku admitted, a few more tears welling up in his eyes. He was so… pretty when he cried. So… delicious. There was something about him that made Himiko want to sink her teeth into his throat and take a nice, big sip. The beeping of her heart monitor made her thoughts maybe a little louder than she intended.

Izuku was sorry for not having been able to save her friends. Tomura would’ve scoffed at him. Called him weak and naive. But he wasn’t here right now. And maybe Tomura wasn’t always right?

Tomura-kun, Magne, Jin-kun, Dabi-kun…

She’d lost a lot of friends.

None of that hurt as much as what was happening right now. Not Izuku’s sadness- no, that was sweet. It was Ochako. The girl refused to even look at her. Those soft brown eyes were trained on Himiko’s bedsheets, but never met her gaze. Why couldn’t she look at her?

Did something happen during their fight?

Himiko remembered stabbing her. Sinking her favorite knife into Ochako’s stomach and watching the blood pour out of her. There’d been so much blood. It stained her clothes and ran down her pale skin and colored it in beautiful shades of red while that same color drained from her face. Those rosy cheeks had become so pale as the younger girl had reached out to her.

They’d talked about romance. About how easily Himiko fell in love. About what love meant to her. About… other things… Had Ochako really tried so hard to save her? To convince her that she was worth saving? Had she… had she really called her cute?

No… that must’ve all been a dream. Himiko had been told her entire life that she was crazy for the way she expressed her emotions. That she was weird, or creepy, or wrong. There was no way Ochako had called her cute. There was no way Ochako had expressed any acceptance like that towards her… That’d all been a dream. Ochako had confessed her love for Izuku to her, after all. She remembered that somewhat clearly. And the way the younger girl seemed to reach for him right now, seemed to hang on his every word… She’d certainly gathered the courage to confess to him after their fight. He’d accepted her love without a second thought. Himiko could be happy for them at least.

Himiko tried to speak, but she fell into another coughing fit. No taste of blood this time, but it still hurt. It exhausted her as well, taking energy out of her she didn’t have to spare. She could feel the greedy claws of that exhausting darkness tugging at her again, desperate for her to return to its embrace. She knew she wouldn’t be able to fight it off for long, but… She had to know. She looked to Ochako, desperate for the girl to return her gaze. Desperate to not feel so alone. Why couldn’t she reach out to her now the way she had before?

“Ochako-chan? … Do you hate me?” She needed to know. She had to know for sure. Her whole life, everyone around her had looked at her the same way Ochako was looking at her now- unable to meet her gaze. Looking anywhere but her eyes. Everyone was always afraid of her. Angry with her. Wanting her to be different. Certainly Ochako felt the same way as all the rest of them, didn’t she?

“How could I possibly hate you, Toga-chan… You saved my life…” Those brown eyes met Himiko’s pale gold, and Himiko thought the world had stopped. Those were the same watery, brown eyes that’d chased her down. That’d begged to be heard. That’d confessed to her to help her feel normal. Maybe… maybe it had all happened?

She almost couldn’t hear the erratic beeping of the heart monitor this time.

“She’s crashing again!”

The world faded quickly, but the last thing Himiko could see were the faces of the two heroes beside her. They looked more worried than her parents ever had…

How strange?

Chapter Text

Himiko had no idea how to keep track of time. Had it been a day since she’d woken up for the first time? A week? She couldn’t be entirely sure. Holding onto consciousness felt like holding onto smoke, and she’d wake up and pass out at odd intervals which were completely unrelated to the sunlight streaming into the room. The bars on the window stood out and made dark, contrasting shadows on the white linoleum floor. Whenever the thin curtains were open, she could make out some bare tree branches just outside her window, but not much else.

Sometimes the pink haired girl or the blonde girl or Recovery Girl or some combination of the three would be behind the glass wall. Whatever they were saying was muffled by the glass, but it was obvious the two younger girls were close friends as they ran whatever medical test they needed to. Why were they even there? They couldn’t have been doctors- they were practically her age. Himiko was positive they must’ve had something to do with her condition, but she couldn’t be sure what.

Sometimes Izuku or Ochako would be there… She was less frustrated about that.

Himiko woke up and passed out about a dozen times, barely holding onto consciousness for a few minutes each time, but a little longer than the time before. Another three cycles passed before she was able to focus on reading the calendar on the far wall of the room. November 5th. 

Five months. She’d been in a coma for five months. At least, that was what one of the nurses had told her. Himiko was a shapeshifter- a liar by nature. She was good at telling when other people were lying or otherwise trying to deceive her. The nurses certainly weren’t being entirely truthful- that much she could easily tell. Unfortunately, she couldn’t be sure what it was they were lying about.

Instead, she focused on her health. She was weak- incredibly so. Sitting up on her own was difficult and swallowing was a chore. Himiko had always been agile and flexible and exceptionally coordinated, but now even the thought of standing made her dizzy. But she was slowly getting stronger every day. The sandpaper scratchiness in her throat was fading and her sharp, pounding headache was subsiding.

Her vision was…

“The vision loss in your right eye must’ve been caused by the coma. We can run some further tests but… it’s likely you won't regain vision in that eye,” Recovery Girl explained, looking up from her notes to see if Himiko would respond. She didn’t. Himiko hadn’t responded to anyone in days since she’d been able to stay awake longer than a few minutes at a time. She wasn’t ready to speak just yet. Especially not when the big question had yet to be answered.

Why was she still alive?

She’d been part of the League of Villains. A terrorist group that’d almost taken control of Japan. A terrorist group that had their sights focused on setting global society ablaze as a whole. Himiko had personally killed hundreds of people. And not all of them had been as a League member. No, she had a history far longer than that, unlike most of the other members of the League.

Why would anyone go through the trouble of keeping her alive- it wasn’t as if the Japanese government was shy about capital punishment. Had they gone through all the trouble to revive her just to put her to death?

She’d get her answer soon enough. One way or the other.

Izuku and Ochako visited every single day. Izuku came by three times a day for meals. He stayed behind the glass wall, relieving either of the two girls or Recovery Girl for their own break. He’d eat his own breakfast, lunch and dinner,  offering comforting smiles and excited thumbs up when Himiko took bites of her own food- usually just okayu with the occasional vegetables. He looked like some kind of exotic aquarium fish, stuck behind the glass in his own little world. There was a burning desire in her chest to join him, but she knew even if she could walk, the handcuffs wouldn’t let her get far. Plus… after the way he’d rejected her… He wouldn’t even want to eat a crepe with her, would he?

Ochako… She only came around when she thought Himiko was asleep. One, two, three in the morning. She’d creep in and take the same seat Izuku would sit in. Himiko could see that Ochako hadn’t been getting much sleep herself. The dark circles under her eyes and her occasional nodding off just to shake herself awake a few moments later didn’t need a rocket scientist to understand. Himiko would pretend to sleep, and Ochako would sit and watch with her hand pressed against the glass for hours until finally getting up to leave as quietly as she’d come some time before dawn. Himiko would sneak glances through barely closed eyes, hoping Ochako would do anything to explain herself. Unlike Izuku, Ochako made Himiko feel like she was the fish trapped behind glass. Unable to understand the person on the other side. It felt awful.

About a week passed before Himiko felt strong enough to try standing on her own. She’d been forced to use a bedpan this entire time, and if she could control one thing about her current situation, it was going to be when and how she used the bathroom.

She spent a day just moving her legs. Getting used to them, like they’d belong to someone else. Well, more than that- her legs often were someone else’s, and even then they were easier to move than they were now. She wiggled her toes, feeling just a little grossed out by how long her nails had grown. She bent her knees, each individual muscle in her thighs and calves creaking as if they’d forgotten how to do their jobs. She stretched her legs up and out and back, forcing them to cooperate. She’d worked up a sweat by the time she’d realized the heart monitor had been beeping a faster rhythm than normal.

“At least you’re smarter than most of my student patients. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve picked someone up off the floor because they’d tried standing up right away instead of even stretching. Your friend Midoriya-kun was a particularly stubborn patient.” Recovery Girl always made small talk whenever she visited, even though she knew Himiko wouldn’t respond. She seemed kind in a way Himiko wasn’t familiar with. Her smile reached the wrinkles in her eyes and it felt warm. This time she’d come with a warm, wet towel for Himiko to wash herself with, some more okayu, a bottle of water and a cookie.

“You don’t have to talk, but you need to eat. You weren’t supposed to be doing physical therapy for another week, but I can already see you’re about as stubborn as any hero student. You need calories in you before you try and stand up or you’re gonna pass out under your own weight.” Himiko wasn’t used to being worried over. Not her parents, not her teachers, not whatever friends she’d made before the League… Jin-kun had worried over her once or twice, but he’d known more than anyone that she could take care of herself, and she often took care of him in turn. Recovery Girl was doing more than she’d ever seen any other doctor do. It just didn’t make sense, and after days of this woman treating her like this with no explanation, Himiko finally snapped.

“Why?”

“Why? Feeling talkative today, huh?” Recovery Girl asked with a small chuckle. Her smile widened even more as she reached Himiko’s hospital bed and checked the readings on the machines still attached to the girl.

Himiko hadn’t meant for the question to come out loud like that. Her rough, raspy, gravely voice had even startled her. But she’d needed to know why Recovery Girl was acting like this. It felt like the eerie politeness All For One used whenever he needed one of the League for something. And she wouldn’t make the mistake of trusting someone like that potato faced jerk ever again.

“You haven’t been on your feet in half a year and-”

“No! Why are you nice,” she hissed, clutching at her hip where she normally kept her knives. It was the fastest way to get information out of someone, and if she just had one blade on her…

“I’m a hero, a doctor, and a grandmother, child. If it’s anyone’s job to make sure you’re okay, it’s mine,” she explained, fussing with the remote to the bed to bring Himiko to a seated position so she could eat properly. She hadn’t even flinched as Himiko had reached for her side. Whether because Recovery Girl knew there was nothing there for Himiko to grab, or because the older woman was confident that the villain wouldn’t have used it even if she’d had one, Himiko couldn’t tell. Himiko thought about those words for a while, clutching tight to the chopsticks that’d come with her food. She stared into Recovery Girl’s eyes, wishing she’d say anything else. She’d known heroes. She’d known doctors. Heck, she’d even known grandmothers. Not a single one of those people had tried to help her when she’d needed it most.

Well… not entirely true… Uravity had tried to help…

But she’d been different.

Himiko placed the chopsticks back on the tray and turned in her bed, pulling the thin sheets up over her head to block out anything else the woman had to say. Recovery Girl was lying. She had to be. There was no way she wasn’t. Himiko’s entire life, heroes and doctors and grandparents had gone out of their way to hurt her. She didn’t believe Recovery Girl’s kindness for even a moment. No one could willingly treat her like this while knowing all the pain and suffering she’d caused for most of her life.

“Stubborn child,” Recovery Girl sighed, placing the remote on Himiko’s bed beside the food tray before walking out of the hospital room. She made it to the door before looking over her shoulder back at her patient. “You’ll have to accept someone’s help eventually. Just do yourself a favor and be more careful with the people you trust than you have been.”

Himiko huffed and waved her off, resuming her self-imposed vow of silence. The old woman was wrong. She didn’t have to accept anyone’s help. Ever.

She waited until a few minutes after the door had shut behind Recovery Girl before turning back around. She could at least enjoy the cookie the old woman had left. She loved manju cookies.

Two weeks passed before she was finally able to stand under her own power. She wasn’t sure how far she could walk considering the handcuffs, but just walking in place without losing her breath after a few moments was enough of a hurdle leapt.

She had to find a way out of here.

Whatever reason the heroes had for keeping her alive, it couldn’t have been good. Especially with the way everyone had been lying to her. She had to find a way to escape. And she had nothing but time to formulate a plan. She watched as guards made their rounds, as Recovery Girl and the two students poured over her health paperwork behind the glass wall. She even kept track of when Izuku and Ochako were most likely to arrive. Himiko had been a villain for years before she’d joined the League, and she’d been good at it. Villains didn’t just happen to evade the hero society they lived in, they had to get good at surviving. That meant escaping just as much as it meant not getting caught.

She planned her escape for Thursday.

Ochako came a bit earlier than usual that night- around one in the morning. Himiko watched her rest for a bit, taking in her soft brown hair and sleepy face. Would she care if this was the last time she’d ever see Himiko? Would she miss her? Himiko wished she could tell Ochako what she was doing. Maybe even leave a note. Tell her thank you for caring. But she had no pen. No paper. And she couldn’t leave a message that someone else would see and track her down with.

Instead, she watched as Ochako’s brown eyes opened as she shook herself awake again. This time, Himiko didn’t pretend to be asleep. Pale gold eyes met brown for the first time in a while. That moment seemed to stretch on forever. So long, Himiko could hear her heart rate on the monitor speed up just a bit. Ochako leaned forward, like she was getting ready to say something.

Anything!

But then she looked away, wiped a tear from her eye, got up from her chair, and walked away.

Goodbye.

Recovery Girl went away early on Thursdays. That left only the two girls around Himiko’s age behind the glass wall. She’d come to learn their names after all this time- Mei and Melissa. They were clearly in love and it was obvious to everyone but themselves. Himiko thought it was quite funny watching them interact when they were on their own- the blonde tiptoeing around her words, while the pink haired girl seemed to blurt out the first thing on her mind just to catch herself the moment something too forward had left her mouth. They were currently working on some metal cube, with Mei using her goggles, entirely focused on the little device, while Melissa seemed to be lost in what the other girl was doing.

Himiko really didn’t want to have to kill them, but she would if she needed to. Fortunately, it seemed the blonde girl was Quirkless and the pink haired girl only had some sort of vision related Quirk- nothing that was all that dangerous it’d warrant their deaths. Himiko would easily be able to knock them both out and escape without kicking the hornet’s nest of killing hero students.

She’d have to do it around 4:30pm. Izuku usually came at 3:10, ate his lunch, talked at her for a bit, then left before 5pm. Usually Himiko didn’t talk to him, but… maybe she’d say just one thing this time. Maybe… just this once…

Himiko held her breath as 3:10 came… and went. No Izuku. 3:20. 3:30… 3:50…

If only she’d known the last time she’d ever see Izuku-kun was last night…

“No time to waste.”

Himiko was only handcuffed on one wrist. It was adjusted once a day at random intervals, but the night before she’d made sure to tense her muscles as one of the hero teachers- Hound Dog- put it back on her. If she squeezed her hand into a tight enough fist, she could just barely slip her way out-

“I wouldn’t recommend doing that right now!” Himiko hissed as she heard Mei’s sing-song voice coming from the intercom next to her bed. How had she been found out? The girl was so focused on the little hunk of metal in front of her!

“You can try tomorrow, but I think it’s really important for you to stay put for what’s happening today,” she offered, not even looking up from her little device. Melissa seemed to snap out of her trance watching Mei work, and panicked just a little. 

“Mei, please don’t encourage the patient to break out,” Melissa said worriedly, resting a hand on her friend’s shoulder.

“Or not! I won’t stop you from escaping but I will call in a teacher to help. I think Cementoss is around right now? Your odds against him are probably pretty low, don’t you think?” Mei still hadn’t even looked up from whatever it was she was doing.

“What’s happening today,” Himiko shouted, her voice still rough and gravely from disuse.

“If you wait another seven minutes you’ll find out for yourself. It was Midoriya’s idea by the way. He wasn’t not coming today, he was just getting everything ready for you,” Mei explained, finally looking Himiko in the eyes as she mentioned Izuku’s name. That gave Himiko some pause. Seven minutes, and she’d get to see Izuku-kun? And he’d planned something special just for her? She knew she could trust him, but… was it worth it?

Himiko glared at Mei before settling back in her bed.

Seven minutes had never stretched on for so long.

It took six before there was a knock at her door, and Izuku’s green hair poked into the room.

“Hello, Toga-san. I, um…  brought some clothes for you.” Izuku took a few steps into the room before setting down a clear bag on Himiko’s bed. Himiko instantly recognized the contents as the UA gym uniform. She’d pieced together over the past week that she was near the school- considering how often Izuku and Ochako came to visit, and how most of the guards happened to be teachers, it was sort of obvious- but the uniform was an odd option to hand her. If she escaped, she wouldn’t even need to pretend to be someone else to get around unnoticed. It seemed so obvious it felt deliberate.

Himiko had so many questions, but she still needed to escape. Even if Izuku was trustworthy, he just… didn’t understand.

“You can say no, but… we made arrangements for you to have company today. You… haven’t been talking to us… And I understand that. But… maybe you’ll talk to someone else? I wanted to try to arrange to give you all some privacy but… I guess you could all just pretend like I’m not here?” Izuku trailed off with a small, nervous smile on his face. He pushed the clear bag a little closer to Himiko, urging her to put the uniform on before leaving the room.

She could trust Izuku. She believed that much. But anyone else? Whoever had cleared this with him? Whoever it was he was trying to make her speak to? Unlikely. Still… her escape attempt was thwarted anyway. Might as well see what it was he’d planned.

It took Himiko a few minutes to get dressed out of her hospital clothes and into the uniform. Mei entered the room from her seat behind the glass wall for just a moment to help her with the sweater, undoing her handcuffs and helping Himiko’s arm through the sleeve.

“Told you. Glad you decided to stay. I won’t handcuff you back until after your company leaves. You deserve a good reunion.” Mei took the handcuffs with her back behind the glass wall before giving Himiko a thumbs up. As if she thought they were friends. Himiko glared at the girl for a few moments, trying to understand what was wrong with her before there was a knock at her door again.

Izuku cracked the door open just a little and poked his head in, eyes closed as if he was making sure Himiko actually was decent before looking.

“Are you dressed?” What a silly question. What a silly boy.

Himiko sighed and rolled her eyes. She’d never understood what everyone’s problem with nudity was. It was all so silly to her. But… if it made Izuku more comfortable…

“Yes,” she sighed, arms crossed over her chest.

“Okay! Good. Like I said, I have to stay in the room with you all, and there’s security outside as well but… I hope this goes well.” Izuku opened the door fully, and Himiko’s breath caught in her chest as she realized who was behind him.

“Spinner-kun?! Mr. Compress?!” She could hardly even believe it. Was this real? Her friends… here? Why had they-

“Hey, hey, hey what kind of sick plot is this?!” Spinner had been pushing Mr. Compress in a wheelchair as they’d entered the room, but his eyes narrowed and he immediately started growing in size as he caught sight of Himiko. He grabbed Izuku and slammed his back against the wall, frothing at the mouth as he shouted at the boy.

“You kill our friend and then pretend she’s alive? Is that what you heroes do now?!” Spinner had grown so large his shoulders were pressed up against the ceiling. His hands were the size of Izuku’s entire torso, but they were trembling as they held him up, clearly filled with more frustration than anger. Izuku had gotten bloodied from the blow, a cut on the back of his head and a gash on his forehead from where some rubble had sliced him left him leaking blood all over the floor. But despite how rough Spinner was treating him, he wasn’t fighting back. Not even struggling against how hard he was pinned against the wall.

Himiko was enraptured by the way his blood streaked down his face, coloring his cheeks and trailing down his jawline before dripping onto Spinner’s hand. Head wounds always bled so pretty. But… Himiko was distracted from Izuku and the blood for just a moment as one of Spinner’s words registered with her.

“Kill? I’m here, Spinner-kun. I didn’t die-”

“LIAR!” The giant lizard man pinned Izuku to the wall with one hand before turning to Himiko with an accusatory gaze and point. “I saw the body! I was at the hospital! Toga Himiko died during the war! I cried over her! Whose Quirk is doing this? Skeptic? That bimbo rookie from Shiketsu? I swear I’ll kill you-”

“Spinner, relax.” Mr. Compress’ voice was labored and so quiet that Spinner had hardly heard it, but he’d stopped pressing Izuku against the wall the moment he’d watched the older man wheel himself towards Himiko. “The best tricks always require some misdirection… And I highly doubt our little Toga-san here would be a good distraction if she weren’t real.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you without your mask, old man,” Himiko mumbled, looking curiously into his brown eyes.

“Not often, no. We didn’t speak all that much while the League was still active. I apologize for that- I should’ve tried harder to make sure you were safe… But tell me something, Toga-san… You told us a story once about your best friend in middle school. You told us something about her that only you would know. Do you remember?”

Himiko’s face darkened as she recognized what Mr. Compress was talking about. It’d been so long ago, but she still remembered it clearly. She knew Mr. Compress just wanted to make sure it really was her, but she’d rather not repeat that story in front of Izuku. It’d been personal!

“Yeah… she went on the news and said I had a repulsive look on my face…” Himiko looked to Izuku, wishing he could just stop listening. She had to tell the rest of the story- anyone could’ve watched that news story and heard what that girl had said.

“I killed her… drank her blood… and killed her family. It was the first time I’d ever used my Quirk.” Himiko wasn’t exactly proud of that- she hadn’t wanted to become that girl. But she hadn’t known she could do that before that day. It’d been her first time shapeshifting. Hell, she hadn’t even really wanted to kill her. She’d just wanted to scare her a little! Why had she said that about her?! Weren’t they supposed to have been friends!? Himiko would’ve never said anything like that about her!

“It’s her, Spinner. It’s Toga-san.”

Spinner was at her side in moments, shrinking so fast that he was his normal size before Izuku had even hit the ground. He quickly rested a hand on Himiko’s shoulder, tears in his eyes as he clung to her. “Toga? You… How?”

“I… was in a coma? That’s what I was told-”

“Toga-san… I think we’ve all been deceived. Might our hero explain what’s going on?” Mr. Compress looked to Izuku, but before the green haired boy could even dust himself off, Mei had left her safe place behind the glass wall. She was still holding onto the weird metal cube she’d been working on. Melissa looked so distraught, but followed her friend out behind the wall as well, gripping tightly onto Mei’s wrist.

“I can explain! And show off our new baby,” Mei said happily, letting the metal cube she’d been working on drop to the ground. A bright light emitted from it when it finally settled, displaying a holographic computer screen.

“No deception! Toga Himiko did die that day. Her blood pressure crashed, and she had no pulse! She was clinically dead for almost an hour before her body was retrieved and brought to Jakku Hospital, where she was declared DOA.” The holographic computer screen displayed footage and pictures of her body. How… lifeless she’d been. Her face had already gone pale, and it was obvious she wasn’t just asleep.

“Getting your body back up and running was easy. A blood transfusion and some life support machines got oxygen through your body before it suffered any irreparable damage! Well… mostly. I’m still not sure how we can fix your eye… But, thanks to-”

“Hatsume-san,” Izuku hissed, his eyes pleading with his friend as he reminded her. Izuku was desperate to protect the person who’d helped revive Toga, and he didn’t need anyone knowing what that person’s Quirk was capable of.

“... right! Thanks to our super secret weapon that I can’t talk about, we were able to fix the damage to your brain! You woke up three days after we fixed you.”

“Super secret weapon,” Mr. Compress repeated, raising an eyebrow at Mei.

“That I can’t talk about! Yup! But it worked! You’re all welcome,” Mei said proudly.

The room grew quiet as it became obvious the hero students weren’t going to explain any further. Both Spinner and Mr. Compress looked to Himiko, waiting for her to say something. Anything. How did she feel about what’d happened to her? How did she feel about having died?

“So… I died,” Himiko asked, turning her eyes from the holographic screen to Izuku. It was almost too impossible to believe. She’d died? Izuku wouldn’t lie to her. He’d tell her the truth.

“... yes. You did… You sacrificed yourself to save Uraraka-san… You’re a hero.” Izuku’s voice wavered as he spoke. Not out of insincerity, but out of gratitude. He’d seen the death toll after the war. While none of his classmates had died, a lot of heroes had during the battle. Each death weighed on his heart- if only he’d been better, or faster or stronger… But he couldn’t imagine losing Ochako. He just…

“Thank you,” he mumbled. Himiko watched as a few tears trickled down his face and mixed with the blood that was already painting his face. Again, he just looked so pretty. Still, not even Izuku’s pretty, teary, bloody face could distract Himiko from the burning in her heart. She just had to know.

“Why,” she asked, eyes narrowed as she held Izuku’s gaze. She needed to know he wasn’t lying when he answered.

“Why? I don’t understand,” Izuku said worriedly, taking a couple of steps towards the bed. Spinner took a step forward himself, practically daring the boy to take another step closer.

“Why… Why am I alive,” she shouted the last word, her voice cracking as she did. She’d been so loud even her friends had flinched at the sound of her voice. There were tears in her own eyes now, her hands clenched so tight her nails were digging into her palms and tearing through skin. She was so frustrated. So angry! She’d sacrificed herself for Ochako-chan! She’d lived and died exactly as she’d wanted to! Why did they take that from her? And for what?!

“You weren’t there! You had no right! I made my choice and you-”

“It wasn’t Midoriya-kun’s fault.”

Everyone in the room turned to the door. Ochako was standing in the doorway, just in front of a panicked looking Cementoss. Himiko couldn’t tell how long they’d been standing there, but Cementoss had likely arrived just a few moments after Spinner’s outburst. Ochako…

“Mei! We’re needed in the other room,” Melissa said quickly.

“Other room? This is the only- My baby!” Melissa had begun tugging Mei back behind the glass wall the moment the other girl had started speaking, almost psychic in her prediction that Mei wouldn’t understand what it was she’d really been telling her. As the two girls headed for the door, the little metal cube chirped excitedly before jumping towards Mei’s extended hand. Mei caught her baby as gently as one would an actual baby before allowing Melissa to finish escorting her behind the glass wall and out the back door.

Ochako took a few moments to speak, gently closing the door behind her to lock the worried looking Cementoss out behind herself.

“It was me, Toga… I… I’m sorry,” she mumbled, tears welling from her eyes as she tried to get her words out. Izuku was at her side in a moment, but stopped just short of taking her hand. Like he was waiting for her to reach out. Himiko was positive Ochako would take his hand, desperate for any kind of support. She knew she’d reach out if she were ever crying like that. Who wouldn’t reach out for their boyfriend at a time like this? Instead, Ochako ignored his hand and took another step forward. She wiped her eyes and tried again.

“I… I know you said you’d lived the way you wanted. I know you’d died the way you’d wanted. I… I just… couldn’t… I couldn’t let you die!” Ochako was begging Himiko to understand. She needed her to get it. After the conversation they’d had… she couldn’t just let Himiko die.

“You couldn’t let me die,” Himiko repeated, her eyes narrowing as she begged Ochako for an answer. This didn’t make any sense. Himiko knew there was no reason for the police to order the doctors revive her in the first place if she’d really been dead. She knew-

“I… Hatsume and I… You can’t blame Hatsume… It was my idea. I… I needed you to be okay, so I… I took your body… I…”

“You revived her? Without any authority oversight,” Mr. Compress asked curiously, a small smile on his face as he understood what Ochako was saying without words. “Certainly a risky performance.”

“I never asked for that,” Himiko hissed, tears welling up in her own eyes. She felt betrayed. Like Ochako had gone to such great lengths just to hurt her all over again. She’d decided! Ochako had no right!  

“I’m a hero, Toga! I- I couldn’t-”

“Spinner… Mr. Compress…” Himiko’s voice was soft, but filled with anger. She didn’t take her eyes off Ochako, but only spoke again when the two villains turned to her.

“Yes, Toga-san,” Mr. Compress asked curiously. He looked to Spinner and back to Himiko, beyond curious as to his friend’s reaction to all this information. She’d survived! How could she be so upset about having survived?

“Where’ve you two been for these months?”

“Tartarus,” Spinner answered hollowly. The realization dawning on him just as it had Mr. Compress. All too quickly they both understood exactly why Himiko had been so frustrated to have been revived. Exactly why she would’ve rather stayed dead.

“So you saved me… Just to throw me in Tartarus?” It wasn’t exactly a question. It was an accusation. Himiko’s eyes narrowed at the two, her hands shaking as she spoke.

Izuku was silent. He couldn’t tell a lie if he tried. Ochako… she opened her mouth to speak once… twice…

“... I… You can still-”

“Thanks a ton, Uravity.” Himiko said her hero name like a swear. All the frustration she’d had for the past month since she’d first woken up bubbling forward in just one word.

Ochako’s shoulders fell, her head hanging low. Tears streamed down her face as the weight of her decisions came crashing down on her and her worst fears were confirmed. Himiko wasn’t grateful.

She’d made a mistake.

Chapter Text

The trial lasted almost two weeks.

Evidence and talking, and talking, and so much talking.

And some crying. Himiko really disliked the crying. Especially when a lot of it had felt so… forced.

She had two lawyers representing her, and as far as she could tell, they’d done their best. Unfortunately for her, there wasn’t much defense someone could bring up to justify Toga Himiko’s actions. Exactly what the trial was for, she wasn’t entirely sure- she’d done all of those things after all. What could possibly warrant debate? What could they possibly plead not guilty to? All she really cared about was what came after, and what she could do at the present to make the time that passed bearable. Each day felt far too long- hours and hours of talking from witnesses- yet her sentencing date came so quickly, it made her head spin. She’d only just managed to get her hair cut the day before for the first time since her coma. She was sitting in her wheelchair, fixing it up in the courthouse’s bathroom. It took some work- doing things with only one eye was kind of a chore. At least she’d been given a pretty, power blue eyepatch from one of her lawyers for the occasion- it matched the powder blue ribbons she had in her hair. She wheeled herself out of the bathroom and was immediately met with shocked stares from her lawyers.

“Toga-san, you can’t have your hair in the buns,” Shirakawa hissed worriedly. She’d planned everything out, from the outfit Himiko would wear to her hairstyle. While Himiko had happily accepted the clothes, she’d put her hair up in the same buns she’d always worn instead of leaving it down as her lawyer had recommended.

“We need the judge to think-”

“I’m wearing my hair the way I like,” Himiko said flatly.

“Toga-san… You realize if they sentenced you to death, you won’t live to see your nineteenth birthday, correct?” That was her second lawyer- Higuruma. He was an older man with dark hair and deep eyes who always looked tired. He’d been almost like a detective during the trial- finding out tiny facts and details that shifted at least some of the responsibility of Himiko’s worst crimes towards Tenko, or Touya, or even Jin, but again, there wasn't much one could say to clear Toga Himiko of her charges. “They’ll expedite your execution date. You won’t be able to-”

“I’m wearing my hair the way I like,” she repeated, leaving no room for argument. Both of her lawyers looked at each other, sighed, and nodded. They’d both worked on difficult cases before, and understood why Himiko was acting out, and what it was she needed. Some kind of agency. Some kind of control. Her life was currently in the hands of an unsympathetic judge who’d spent the past two weeks hearing the worst of her crimes. She could wear her hair however she needed to feel in control.

Shirakawa pushed Himiko’s wheelchair into the courtroom, bringing the young woman through the packed hall to her spot on the bench. A hush came over the room as the dozens of people on the prosecution side glared at Himiko. There were people she thought she recognized as heroes, and some she couldn’t recognize at all. Not that it mattered to her- she didn’t care about any of them. They’d all already judged her before hearing a word of the trial. Their opinions didn’t matter to her. Instead, she kept her eyes on the defense’s side. There were only a handful of people there- it wasn’t as if she had many friends or family that’d sit in her defense… Mr. Compress and Spinner-kun were there at least! Handcuffed and surrounded by their escort of a few heroes that perfectly matched their Quirks should they try to escape, but there. Himiko caught both of their gazes, and gave a small wave to Mr. Compress who’d done the same.

Then her eyes met those of Ochako and Izuku. Soft brown and bright green. Honestly, she thought that both of them would’ve stopped coming by now. Both Izuku and Ochako had heard nearly every gruesome detail of most of the crimes she’d ever committed in her life. Surely they couldn’t stand looking at her? Yet, here they were. Himiko couldn’t look at them for long, but if this was the last time she’d ever see them…

They were seated in front of a few other heroes- friends who were with them for moral support. Himiko recognized Ryukyu and Tsu sitting behind Ochako, and All Might and that loud boy Dynamight sitting behind Izuku. Sitting to Ochako’s left were Mei, Melissa, and a bored looking blue-haired girl wearing what Himiko recognized was a Seiai Academy uniform. She’d always thought their uniforms were kinda cute…

“We’re here today to sentence Toga Himiko-jukeisha. Among the dozens of crimes she’s convicted of are charges of terrorism, treason, almost a hundred individual aggravated murders, multiple assaults with a deadly weapon, unlicensed use of her Quirk, impersonation of licensed heroes, kidnapping, false imprisonment, torture, and many, many more. She was also a lieutenant of the Paranormal Liberation front- the same group responsible for the massacre of Jaku City, which led to the deaths of over eleven thousand civilians. Finally, she’s responsible for the biggest disruption to the hero’s plans during the final war- removing hero Deku from the battle against Shigaraki Tomura and nearly guaranteeing the defeat and deaths of over a dozen heroes that’d put their lives on the line to stop his carnage.” The judge was an old, rough looking man with gray hair and sunken eyes. Himiko had never learned his name, nor did she care to. He read from the list of crimes like it was a shopping list, and Himiko really did feel odd at how long the list had become. Still, she was positive that if that paper held every crime she’d ever committed, it’d be quite a bit longer.

“While Toga Himiko-jukeisha was a minor at the time she committed these crimes, this court has come to the conclusion that due to the sheer severity and magnitude of her crimes, capital punishment will remain a viable option for her sentencing.” Himiko knew in her heart that the fact they’d even pushed to include the death penalty as a potential punishment for her sentencing despite her having been a minor meant that they were certainly going to use it.

They’d already given the game away.

“Unlike her League comrades- Iguchi Suichi-jukeisha and Sako Atsuhiro-jukeisha- she has a history of violent crimes that reaches back long before she’d ever become involved with the League. This life of violent crime wasn’t just a one time thing for Toga Himiko-jukeisha. She’s been a career criminal from the age of thirteen. She’s got a rap sheet longer than most villains three times her age.” Himiko huffed and adjusted her eyepatch, wishing he’d just get on with it. She was positive this man just liked hearing the sound of his own voice.

“We’ll be hearing from… four people? Are these names correct?” The judge narrowed his eyes as he read the names off the paper in front of him to himself. Himiko couldn’t decipher the look on his face, all she could really tell was that his reaction to the first two names was much different from his reaction to the second two. He set the paper down and looked to both Shirakawa and Higaruma as if they’d told some bad joke that hadn’t landed well.

“Yes, sir,” her lawyers responded, standing up from their seats to respond to him as cordially as they could.

“All names we’ve submitted are correct, and unless they’ve decided of their own accord to not speak today, will be speaking on our client’s behalf,” Higaruma confirmed.

“Okay… We’ll be hearing from four people on Toga Himiko’s behalf as to why she deserves the court’s leniency,” the judge sighed, rifling through his set of papers one last time before leaning back in his chair. He looked like he’d already made up his mind, but that’s not what really stood out to Himiko. Four? Four names? That didn’t sound right. Himiko wasn’t sure who on earth would’ve decided to fight on her behalf. It didn’t make sense.

“First, we’ll be hearing from Iguchi Suichi-jukeisha- villain name: Spinner.” The moment the judge said his name, a loud muttering came over the courtroom, as if someone had kicked a beehive. No one could believe that the League of Villain member was speaking on Himiko’s behalf- well, more like they couldn’t believe he was allowed to. Most of them had probably been hoping he’d been given the death penalty himself for his own actions during the Jaku battle and his attack on the hospital, however he’d managed to skate by with just life in prison as his actions with the League had been his first and only offenses of his life. Higuruma and Shirakawa had done a great job defending him.

Himiko turned to look at Spinner, eyes wide in quiet confusion as he was escorted towards the witness stand. Spinner nodded to her as he passed, handcuffed and shackled and escorted by Gang Orca, Miruko and Tentacole. For just a moment, Himiko thought how proud Spinner must feel. He required a contingent of heroes that included two of Japan’s Top 10, as well as a powerful UA Hero Student just to keep him in check. She’d remembered how he’d lamented once or twice about how out of place he’d felt among the League. About how he was weak- too weak to be of any help to their cause. He wasn’t weak anymore. No one would ever try to tease him for being a Heteromorph again.

Tentacole handed Spinner a few papers and gently patted him on the shoulder before taking a few steps back from the witness stand, and Spinner nodded appreciatively before clearing his throat. Himiko couldn’t help but be a little curious about that. Had those two known each other or something? She’d remembered seeing the hero student during her first meeting with Izuku-kun, and he hadn’t been particularly pleasant to interact with…

“Stain gave his life fighting All For One alongside his idol- All Might.” Spinner’s voice was rough and gravely, and he spoke kind of slowly as he read from the paper in front of him. The Body Bulk Quirk All For One had given him hadn’t exactly agreed with his body and made it difficult for him to think or speak very articulately. Probably exactly what All For One had wanted from his other attack dog, Gigantomachia. “He sacrificed himself to preserve this hero society, because he believed that it was worth saving. But more than that… he believed in All Might and Deku. Two heroes who truly embodied what it means to be a hero.”

“When I first met Toga-chan, she’d told me that she loved Stain. That she wanted to be just like him. At first, I’d thought she’d been inspired by him in the same way I had been. That she’d been… disillusioned with hero society and wanted to change it, just like I did.” Himiko thought back to the day she’d met Spinner. They had bonded over their love of Stain. She’d even pointed out how Spinner’s outfit was almost an exact replica of the Hero Killer’s, and he’d gone on a bit of a ramble on how he’d paid careful attention to every little detail of Stain’s outfit to make something so similar. She remembered thinking to herself that Spinner must be in love with Stain the same way she was if he was willing to dress like him. The only difference was that she could drink his blood and actually become him…

“To a lot of you, that probably sounds damning. Just another reason why Toga-chan doesn’t deserve any kindness or leniency. But to me… to people who’ve been on the receiving end of a broken system our entire lives… I used to think only other Heteromorphs could understand what that discrimination felt like. How oppressive and crushing it felt to be hated for just existing. But Toga-chan understood. She understands. And that's why she’s here today, at the mercy of Japan’s justice.” He’d said the final word like a swear, glaring at some of the heroes in the crowd. People he considered unworthy of the title. He only stopped glaring when his eyes met Deku’s. There were some worthy heroes out there as well, he had to admit.

“Toga-chan hated false idols and unworthy heroes as much as Stain did. We were kindred spirits, in that way. We wanted to make the world better. She wanted to make the world better. And now she finds herself in a courtroom fighting for her life for something that anyone fortunate enough to get a hero license or have been born on I-Island would be applauded for?” Spinner hissed and pounded the desk in front of himself in frustration. Himiko wished she could reach out to him and hug him. He always did let his emotions get the better of him. She could see some of the heroes that’d been tasked to watch him shift in their seats, as if they were getting ready for him to try to attack or escape. Instead, Spinner cleared his throat and set the crumpled papers in his hands down on the desk in front of himself.

“Himiko-chan doesn’t deserve to die. And if this court has a heart at all, it’d agree with me,” he said with a huff. His pink eyes locked onto Himiko’s gold, and he hissed again, a deep, reptilian sound coming from deep in his chest.

“Thank you.” Whether the gratitude was aimed at the court for hearing what he had to say, or at Himiko for being one of the first people to really understand why he did what he did, the audience couldn’t be sure. Himiko watched Spinner as he was led away from the stand. She wanted to rush over and hug him, and thank him for being so sweet and maybe tease him for having been such a sap, but… well, what she wanted to do really didn’t matter when she was a convicted criminal, did it?

Instead, she mulled over what he’d said. “She finds herself in a courtroom fighting for her life for something that anyone fortunate enough to get a hero license would be applauded for.” She technically had earned a hero license. A provisional one, at least.

“Utsushimi-san. Please-”

“Uh, can we just use Camie? Utsushimi-san’s actually that totes beautiful lady in the crowd right now. Hi, mom! Sorry guys- she’s not single!” Camie had excitedly waved over to her mom and dad, a playful smirk tugging at her pouty lips. The crowd had chuckled at the young woman’s casual demeanor, almost forgetting how serious the trial they were attending was. Even the judge had cracked a smile for the first time before banging his gavel a couple of times to get everyone to settle down.

“... right. Well, Camie… can you tell us what happened to you when you were attacked by Toga Himiko?” The prosecutor was a tall, lanky woman with bright purple hair that went by Watanabe-san. She looked… somewhat familiar to Himiko, from her purple hair to her blue sclera, but she couldn’t quite place the resemblance. Either way, Watanabe-san didn’t look like she laughed all that much either.

“Um… barely a skosh,” Camie said with a shrug, looking into the crowd for a moment. Her eyes caught Himiko’s for the briefest of seconds before they snapped back to Watanabe’s. “I like, barely remember a lick from that whole shebang. One sec I was headed back to my crib from school- totes mindin’ my own b- and then the next thing I know I’m wakin’ up tied up in my closet. And like, not in the fun way!” That had earned another small, nervous laugh from some of the people in the crowd. Himiko had cocked her head as she listened to Camie speak. She hadn’t really known Camie, but she’d studied the hero student enough to have been able to be a convincing double of her for an entire day. She’d targeted Camie almost specifically because of how personable, playful and outgoing she was. But something had itched the back of Himiko’s mind about the way Camie was speaking. She’d been almost positive that the other woman was lying. However, she couldn’t have been sure about what.

“My mom cut me out when she got home from work and we went and got ice cream with my dad after reporting it to the cops. It was like, NBD, y’know?” Camie had shrugged again before leaning back in her chair as if she were sitting through a somewhat boring math lecture.

“Is there anything else you remember, Utsushimi-san?” Watanabe had only seemed a little frustrated. As if Camie had been a child that’d refused to cooperate with basic instructions. She’d seemed to be giving Camie another chance to answer, as if she hadn’t believed her. Her tone had rang in Himiko’s ears. It’d been the tone of someone asking a question they already knew the answer to. The tone of a liar.

“I um… I was mostly catching z’s the whole time. I swear it deadass wasn’t anything super serious-”

“I’d like to turn the court’s attention to subject C1. Utsushimi-san, can you tell us if you recognize the voice speaking in these audio logs?” Watanabe had held up a tape recorder and showed everyone in the courtroom before pressing play.

“You’ve gotta like… promise me that I won’t ever have to do this again, alright, Doc?” That had definitely been Camie’s voice coming from the recorder. It was wavering, and her usual gyaru slang seemed like a fake accent she had to remember to use. “Like, it feels totes cringe reliving this and I… Alright.” Watanabe had paused the recorder before she’d looked to Camie for confirmation.

“Yeah… That’s me I guess,” Camie had mumbled, arms crossed over her chest as she answered Watanabe’s question. For the first time since she’d taken the stand, she’d looked uncomfortable, and her gaze went from her parents to the green-haired UA Hero Student and the purple-haired Shiketsu hero student that was currently at Mr. Compress’ side. Then to one of the Shiketsu hero students in the crowd- one large, muscular boy with short black hair.

“These audio logs have been compiled from the therapy sessions with your psychiatrist,” Watanabe had explained before turning away from Camie and towards the crowd. She hadn’t really seemed to care that most of them were there, but was instead looking to Camie’s parents. “The psychiatrist that was recommended after Shiketsu High’s diligent and watchful guidance counselor noticed Utsushimi-san exhibiting symptoms of trauma after her incident with Toga Himiko.” Camie’s mother had looked down at her feet, her shoulders falling in a moment of grief. Camie’s father had rested a hand on his wife’s thigh, doing his best to console her. He’d felt just as guilty for his part in what’d happened to his daughter.

“Do you remember what you said during these meetings, Utsushimi-san,” Watanabe had asked before turning back to Camie with a curious look on her face. Like she’d had a fish on the end of her line and was waiting for it to tire before reeling it in.

“Sis, ya gotta call me Camie,” she’d responded. Camie’s wide smile didn’t look as convincing this time. “And like I said on the syllabus, those convos are ancient history. Trust, talking with the shrinks worked like a charm ‘cuz I barely remember-”

“I like, don’t even remember how she snatched me up.” Camie’s voice was quiet coming from the recorder, but still audible considering the hush of the audience. Her voice traveled far through the large courtroom. “I just woke up gagged and tied up in my closet. Tight. Y’know, ya gotta have enough slack in the ropes to slip two fingers under for it to be comfy and not cut off your circulation, but I didn’t even have that.” Camie let out a forced chuckle through the recording, and Himiko couldn’t tell what was sadder. How poorly Recorded Camie was pretending to keep it together, or how poorly Current Camie was pretending.

“It’s okay, Camie… You’re okay.” A male voice followed after Camie’s, sounding comforting as he spoke to her.

“Let the record show that at this moment in the transcript, Utsushimi-san’s psychiatrist- Dr. Iwata- noted that she’d reached for her wrists and scratched at her skin for a few moments until he stopped her,” Watanabe had paused the recording, catching a few people by surprise. It’d almost been like she’d rehearsed the entire thing. “Utsu… Camie? Can you show everyone your wrists?”

“Wha? Oh, nah, I’d rather eat unwashed ass-”

“Camie? You’re safe here. You understand that, right,” Watanabe had said, trying to mimic Dr. Iwata’s calming, sincere tone. Himiko didn’t think she did a really good job. “You don’t have to pretend here. Just speak freely.”

“Yeah, nah, I get that, I just-”

“Your wrists, please,” Watanabe repeated so sternly it barely sounded like a request.

Camie had hesitated for a few moments and looked at the two hero students next to Mr. Compress again before sighing and rolling up her sleeves. Then she’d removed a watch, and about a dozen bracelets before her skin underneath was finally revealed. There was a two inch wide patch of skin on both of her wrists that was raw and scabbed, as if she’d been picking at it for days.

“How did you get these injuries, Camie,” Watanabe had asked. Himiko could tell the prosecutor already knew the answer. To be honest, it wasn’t hard to guess what’d caused them.

“I don’t wanna talk about that… Can I say no?” It’d almost been as if Camie had forgotten her playful gyaru slang altogether. Her voice was small, and she looked downright vulnerable as she all but pleaded with the older woman. Watanabe had seemed to take a moment. Maybe she thought she shouldn’t press this any further? Then the older woman had looked back into the crowd and seen Mr. and Mrs. Utsushimi looked absolutely devastated. The teen had kept these feelings from everyone around her- even her parents.

Watanabe had sighed and pressed play on the recorder again.

“It’s like… hard for me to catch my beauty sleep sometimes, y’know,” Recorded Camie explained. She sounded more agitated this time- clearly some length of time after the previous recording. “Barely, like, a few hours at a time… I still can’t sleep more than three or four nights a week… I like, have nightmares every night, doc… Sometimes I wake up and I can still feel the ropes digging into my wrists-”

“You’re stimming again, Camie. Please… your wrists are already raw,” Dr. Iwata said worriedly. The tape cut short again, and Watanabe had looked at the crowd with a somber look on her face.

“Camie, you’ve been scratching your own wrists raw… Would you say this is in any way linked to your traumatic experience at the hands of Toga Himiko,” Watanabe had asked pointedly. It didn’t exactly take a genius to link the two issues, and the crowd didn’t really need the answer.

“... if you wanna phrase it like that… sure, I guess,” Camie had mumbled, her eyes locked on the wood desk in front of her as she refused to look into the crowd, fearful of seeing guilt on her family’s and friend’s faces. Himiko could see that Camie’s entire demeanor had changed while she was listening to her own story. Her face was pale and she’d seemed so much smaller than she’d looked when she’d first sat down.

“Were you scared when you were at Toga Himiko’s mercy? Did she do anything to ease your worries that you’d survive her capturing you,” Watanabe had asked, her eyes narrowing as she glared at Himiko. The thought that the woman looked so familiar had crossed her mind again, but for the first time since the trial had started, Himiko was interested in what one of the witnesses had to say. She really hadn’t scared Camie that badly… Had she?

“I… I don’t know, I-”

“I didn’t wake up all that often… or for long. She must’ve drugged me… But every time I did… It was when she was pressing her knife against my skin. She’d slit my arms or my thighs… Fill up a new vial with my blood. I didn’t know what for- I thought she was crazy- until she… I watched her turn into me and pretend to be me… She looked through my phone and watched vids I’d taken with friends and then she’d repeat back phrases I’d said in them until she got them right. Like she was auditioning for a movie… It was the spookiest shit I’ve ever seen in my fucking life…”

“It’s okay, Camie… take your time. No one’s going to hurt you,” her doctor said, doing his best to comfort her. It was obvious that even her psychiatrist’s gentle voice wasn’t enough to keep Camie from breaking down for long.

“Doc… The whole time I… I wasn’t even scared for me. I was terrified for my ‘rents and my squad… I thought she’d use my body to merc them.” There was another long pause as Recorded Camie fought back her tears.

“I’d heard about her in the news and I remembered that story about her from years ago. She’d gone to a school in Saitama and we’d all been told to be on the lookout for weeks- couldn’t even go home alone and had to get picked up by a parent. I remember my mom and pop being a little teed off about that… but that was years ago…” Camie’s voice over the recording finally broke, and she could be heard sobbing for a few moments before the recording stopped. The current Camie had started crying some time before the pause button had been pressed. The entire time she’d been bound, gagged and cut- tortured by all means, she’d only ever worried about those closest to her. Himiko was positive that Stain would call someone like that a true hero…

Watanabe had skipped a few minutes through the recording, not needing the entire audience to hear Camie crying. They’d already understood how she’d felt. Now they needed to worst part of the story.

“She didn’t feed me the entire time… Only gave me water when she remembered… I had’ta drink through the gag… She was worried I’d scream I guess… I couldn’t tell her I just didn’t want her to hurt my fam…” Recorded Camie was crying even harder now, and it felt so foreign to Himiko. Crying for one’s family? Out of fear for them? Camie’s family had seemed so unimportant at the time- a nuisance she’d have to avoid to keep the charade up long enough for her plan to work and get to meet Izuku-kun again. In fact, she’d only kidnapped Camie to take her blood because she’d be attending the same Hero Provisional Licensing exam that Izuku-kun would be at. It didn’t even have to be Camie- although the woman’s good looks and shapely body were definitely a plus for distracting Izuku-kun. It could’ve been anyone. It hadn’t been personal.

“I pissed myself, doc…” Camie’s voice was weak. Pathetic. Wavering and quiet and barely able to be understood through the tears. But she was still speaking. Too weak to try to relive the story at a later time, too strong to stop. “I was tied up for days… I pissed on my fave boots. I’ve bleached and scrubbed my closet twice a week for months… Every Sunday and Tuesday- the day she’d kidnapped me and the day my mom found me… but I swear I can still smell it.” Another sobbing fit from Recorded Camie had forced Current Camie to wipe tears from her eyes. The young woman had finally been forced to look up from the spot on the table she’d been staring at only to sob even harder when she noticed her parents were crying. She’d never meant for them to hear this.

“I’m sorry,” she mouthed, but that only broke the Utsushimis down further. They’d had no idea that their daughter had still been suffering so much since the incident. Himiko had looked at Camie and felt an odd kinship with the woman despite their astronomical differences. Utsushimi Camie had a Glamour Quirk- one that let people see only what she wanted her to see. A liar, just like Himiko was… except far, far different. Maybe they could’ve been friends?

Maybe…

“It wasn’t even fifty hours. I was headed home around seven, then the entire day of the Licensing Exam… I trained so hard for that damn test, doc, I swear. I would’ve earned my License, you’ve gotta believe me-”

“I believe you, Camie. You don’t have anything to prove,” Dr. Iwata affirmed.

“Yeah… I… my mom got home around eight the next day… I was too scared to scream… I thought it was her. I’d thought that Toga had somehow captured my mom using my body and she’d used her Quirk to turn into her. I thought she was testing me, to see if I’d scream for help. My mom only came looking for me because she’d tried calling and my phone was dead. She only found me in the closet because of the smell…” Not a single noise could be heard throughout the courtroom other than the Utsushimi’s crying. Watanabe had sighed as she skipped a few minutes forward in the recording.

“The worst part? I dunno… it hurts. Seiji literally had no idea that she wasn’t even me… Neither did Inasa, but I can’t even blame him- he’s a grade under me and we didn’t even share classes. Setsu had her own test that day at a different facility- how could I possibly blame her for not coming over? But not even my parents… Dad was at work and mom probably thought I’d fallen asleep early the night before my exam… But if she’d just checked maybe she would’ve noticed? Maybe Toga would’ve killed her if she had? I can only blame myself for getting caught and I… I don’t know… I… I’d been missing for so long and I… I’m sorry.” Another minute passed before Camie’s voice returned. This time, her voice wasn’t wavering anymore. She wasn’t crying anymore.

“Doc… I’d never been so scared in my life… For my fam, my friends… I hate her… I fucking hate her.”  

“Is that still true, Camie? Do you hate Toga Himiko,” Watanabe had asked, pausing the recording for just a moment as she asked her question. Her finger had been resting on the play button, like she’d already known the answer and knew she was going to have to interrupt Camie.

“I… I… It’s like, whatever. It happened.” Camie’s playful attitude had melted away long ago. It was far past believable anymore, but she was still trying. “You can ask all my friends now- Seiji, Setsu and Inasa are right there! It doesn’t even bother me anymore-”

“I’ve gotta fake it ‘till I make it. I can’t let anyone know how screwed up I am behind this biz… Camie isn’t a traumatized victim who needs friends to walk her home because she’s too afraid she’ll get snatched again! Camie doesn’t have panic attacks while using the bathroom because of the scent of piss! Camie is supposed to be a hero! I can’t let them know… I can’t let anyone know… I have to pretend… I’m pretty good at it now, don’tcha think? Didja see the way I helped out against that Potato Faced Talkin’ Nutsack All For One?” Watanabe had finally put the tape recorder down and set it aside, resting a hand on the desk in front of Camie.

“Camie, do you think Toga Himiko feels sorry for what she’s done to you? Do you think she cares even the slightest that she’s traumatized you in this way,” Watanabe had asked, her dark eyes narrowed as she mentioned Himiko’s name.

“I… I dunno, I-”

“I think you do. I think you’re fully aware that Toga Himiko is a remorseless monster who is willing to traumatize a young woman like yourself- an innocent bystander in her supposed quest for a better world- just to… speak to a boy? Was that it? All of this just to speak with Midoriya Izuku for a few minutes,” Watanabe had asked in disgust. The crowd began to murmur again, and even Izuku looked uncomfortable at the implication. Himiko really had traumatized Camie just for a chance to speak to him. Her mind wandered for just a moment. Would she do it again if she had the chance?

… probably… But maybe not to someone like Camie next time.

“You’re safe here. Say what you’ve always wanted to say to her,” Watanabe had offered, taking a few steps to her right so Camie had a clear line of sight to see Himiko. It took Camie a long time to get her words together, but when she finally did, Himiko could tell the taller woman wasn’t lying.

“... I fucking hate what you did to me you psycho bitch.”

A lot of people had told Himiko that they hated her over the years. None had ever said it with that amount of righteous fury.

Chapter Text

“Next, we’ll be hearing from Sako Atsuhiro-jukeisha- villain name: Mr. Compress,” the judge sighed, rolling his eyes as he read the name aloud. Himiko wondered if the judge seemed a little more frustrated at this name than he had with reading Spinner’s. She watched as the green-haired hero student wheeled Mr. Compress towards the stand. Himiko had learned about a day after Camie’s testimony that the woman’s hero name was Lizardy. Apparently she had a Quirk that let her split her body up into dozens of pieces. A pretty natural counter to Mr. Compress’ close quarters fighting style where he either turned his Quirk on a person’s entire body to capture them or on just a part of their body to maim them. She and Meatball- a hero student with another Quirk that was a solid counter to Mr. Compress’ stood behind him as he took the stand. Snipe and a few other long range heroes kept their eye on him from the crowd, very much on duty compared to the other heroes who were sitting down. Apparently the heroes thought he was the more dangerous League member out of those who were left.

“Hello, everyone. Thank you all for taking the time out to hear the words of a convicted felon. I suppose I was horribly wrong when I believed the people of Japan were lacking in compassion towards those they felt were undeserving. I promise, I’ll be brief with my petition to the courts, and I hope by the end of what I have to say you will all prove me wrong yet again, and give both myself and Toga-san much to think about in Tartarus.” Himiko almost smirked as she listened to Mr. Compress speak. He was always an entertainer. Always so funny. Where Spinner’s speech had been more raw and emotional, she was positive Mr. Compress’ would be a little better put together. A little more efficient at tugging on heartstrings and getting her out of the death penalty. Unfortunately, she was already certain that everyone- including the judge- had already made up their minds a long time ago. Maybe before the trial had even started. Before she’d even joined the League. Mr. Compress’ performance might just be falling on long-deafened ears.

“I met Toga-san the same way we had all met one another at the League. Shigaraki had gathered like-minded individuals from across Japan, and promised us that we could work towards the common goal of a better life. A more decent life. I’d joined for my own reasons- an attempt to retrace the steps of my grandfather’s grandfather- the Peerless Thief- and return a sense of decency to the neediest of Japan. I’ve since come to learn to regret my actions, however Toga-san… she had a reason I could only describe as altruistic.” Himiko hadn’t seen him without his mask all that often. She’d had no idea his brown eyes were so expressive. There’d been a time where she’d thought he might’ve been ugly under the mask, but now she understood clearly. He was simply too good a performer. His face pulled the crowd in- made his job so easy! Too easy! He’d worn the mask to make things even. But now he was pulling out all the stops, and maybe- for just a moment- she thought he might be able to get her a chance.

“She never revealed too much about herself. She never asked for pity or special treatment despite her age- she was the youngest of us, after all. No, all she ever asked for was a chance to be herself, and to love freely. You must understand, I’m a bit of a romantic, and I sympathized with her goals. But then I heard about what’d led to her joining us…” Mr. Compress looked away for a moment, wiping a tear from his eye with his prosthetic arm. He really could’ve been an actor- he could’ve had his name in lights. He could’ve even made it to Hollywood! Maybe as one of those television magicians? Instead, he’d tried to do what he’d thought was right. And that’d led him here…

“You all have already heard about how Toga-san was a victim of the horrific, brutal Quirk Counseling system. She’d been denied her very right to express herself as an individual throughout her entire life. She wasn’t just fighting back against a broken system. She was fighting an existential battle the likes of which most of us couldn’t ever appreciate. I watched her fight that very battle against the rogue reporter- Kizuki Chitose-san.” Himiko shivered as he brought up that name. She couldn’t help but glare at Watanabe, who was sitting in her seat at the prosecution’s desk looking rather unimpressed with what Mr. Compress had to say about the late reporter.

“This court has convicted Toga Himiko of a litany of crimes, but what this court has failed to acknowledge is that she is also a victim. A victim of her own Quirk, a victim of failed parenting, a victim of a disgusting Quirk Counseling system that had villainized her long before she’d ever even joined the League.” His voice cracked at that, and he went quiet for a few moments. Himiko curiously tilted her head at that display of emotion. She was very good at telling when people were lying. It was odd to not be able to tell if Mr. Compress was. Surely this speech was just an elaborate performance, wasn’t it?

“This court previously ruled that I was deserving of its mercy. I’m currently serving my time at Tartarus, and I’m grateful to the people of Japan for giving me a chance to reflect on the error of my ways. If- somehow- the words of this poor villain haven’t yet moved you, then I have but one meager request.” Himiko’s eyes narrowed as she watched Atsuhiro use his cane and rise to his feet. He looked so fragile like this. Not the snarky, cocky old man she’d known. Lizardy took a half-step forward, trying to help him up, but the man stood on his own. His suit hung loosely off his injured side, and the entire courtroom could tell how painful it must be for him to stand like this. He’d maimed himself during the Jaku raid, and had scooped out so much flesh and bone from his body it was a miracle he was still alive. Just a testament to how the heroes really had done their best to keep everyone they’d captured alive.

“I’d gladly lay down my life in exchange for Toga Himiko. I-”

“No!” Himiko tried to stand, but her legs were still too shaky to stand so quickly. There was desperation on her face as she realized what Mr. Compress was doing. He was trying to trade! Was that even allowed?! Could he really-

“Toga-san, sit down,” Shirakawa hissed, placing her hand on Himiko’s shoulder and forcing her to stay in her seat.

Atsuhiro had paused for just a moment as Himiko had called out, a small, sorry smile on his face. He knew Himiko wouldn’t have wanted this, but for all his pomp and circumstance, he felt it was his absolute duty to do everything he could to keep Himiko alive. She deserved someone to fight for her, even if it was just a villain. He continued on the moment her lawyers had gotten a hold of her. “Unlike Himiko-chan, I’m a grown man with an injury that’ll certainly shorten my life a decade or two. If anyone deserves to pay for their crimes with their life, it’s me. I beg of you, citizens of Japan, if you won’t spare Toga Himiko’s life for her, do it for me, with my own,” he said, bowing as low as he could.

“It’s the right thing to do. I hope the people of Japan can believe in the sincerity of my words.” Himiko wanted to scream and shout and fight as Mr. Compress was wheeled past her, back towards the audience and into the defense’s side of the crowd. Why had he done that? Why had he offered his own life? His actions weren’t hers! He’d been captured before the final battle! No way he could take responsibility for the actions she’d made! It wasn’t fair!

Himiko was forced to sit and seethe as the judge called for a break. There were a lot of breaks during a trial, she’d come to realize. She took the time to think about Mr. Compress’ words. He’d brought up her parents. Failed parenting, he’d called it. Was that even true? Had they failed her? Or would she have always turned out this way? She tried so hard to pretend they didn’t even exist, but it was impossible not to see their faces in the crowd on the prosecution’s side after what they’d said just a few days ago.

“We tried our best with Himiko. We… we really did.” Toga Fuku’s mascara had been running as she spoke at the witness stand. Her shoulders had been shaking from the moment she’d sat down at the bench, practically sobbing before the first question had even been asked of her. Himiko’s eyes had widened as she’d met her mother’s pale gold gaze for the first time in years. Half a decade. Longer. This had to have been some kind of sick joke. Himiko had even stopped by to visit her old family home, and her parents had been long gone. How were they here now? Why were they here now?

She’d never expected to see them again in her life…

“I wish I could tell you where we went wrong so no one ever has to go through this again… She ruined our family,” Toga Arata had explained, his voice steady and deep without a hint of remorse for the things he was saying about his own flesh and blood. Her father’s choppy, blond hair was thinning and graying, but it was obvious where Himiko had gotten her own locks from. Looking at him had made her own hair feel foreign.

“Tell us about your daughter, Toga-san,” Watanabe had said, her voice far softer and gentler than Himiko had heard it before up till then. Like she’d deemed the Toga parents more deserving of kindness than any witness she’d examined so far. It had made Himiko feel sick.

“She has always been like this. From the time she was a child, she… she was wretched ,” Fuku had sobbed while wiping tears from her eyes and blubbering and wailing through her testimony.

“She’d killed a baby bird and was sucking its blood… It was horrible,” Arata had explained, not casting a single glance towards his daughter sitting just a few feet in front of him. It had been the first time he’d seen her in years, but as far as he’d been concerned, she’d been dead to him. He’d lost Himiko long before she’d ever attacked her first victim.

“We tried everything. We spoke to her, we tried normal counseling, we tried Quirk Counseling, we even put her in after-school programs to try to fix her,” Fuku had been shouting in desperation, her voice cracking as she’d tried to explain to the world how much she’d done to avoid this very outcome. How much she’d wanted to be a good mother to her daughter. How much she’d wanted her daughter to be normal.

“What about your daughter do you feel was broken, Toga-san,” Watanabe had asked, resting a consoling hand on the older woman’s. She’d been trying to coax the most emotional reaction possible from Fuku, clearly playing into the guilt she felt for having birthed Himiko. The guilt she felt from having brought such a dangerous person into the world.

“Everything! She’s a monster,” Fuku had shouted while slamming her hands down in frustration. Himiko had been called a monster so many times she’d lost count. She’d been called a monster so many times, she’d thought she’d become numb to it long before she’d ever joined the League. But those same emotions she’d felt the first time she’d ever been called it bubbled to the surface all over again. It’d felt… different… coming from her mother of all people.

“We gave her everything she needed, and all we ever wanted in return was for her to be a normal little girl. Play with dolls, talk about boys, ask for a kitten or a pony or something… Instead, everything was about blood. Her obsession with blood. It was disgusting… It became the only time she ever smiled. I loathed it. I hated it. I hated seeing my own daughter happy,” Arata had explained, his orange eyes dark and filled with disgust as he discussed his own daughter.

“We fled years ago. We… We knew she was going to grow up to hurt someone eventually. She already had! We just wanted a normal daughter and instead… That’s why we’re here today. We wanted to make things right. If our testimony can help put her away for good… where she couldn’t hurt anyone else ever again…. We failed as parents… I’m so, so sorry… I’ve blamed myself every day for years. We must’ve done something wrong for her to come out so terrible.” Fuku had seemed inconsolable. As if she were the one on trial for her own crimes. Himiko couldn’t even bring herself to feel frustrated with her mother. She’d just seemed so pathetic.

“Was there ever a time where you thought the counseling had worked? Where you thought Himiko might become the child you’d always wanted,” Watanabe had asked, her tone already demanding a specific sort of answer.

“... no… No. Before she’d even started school… I don’t think Himiko ever would’ve been a normal girl,” Arata had explained, turning his gaze to Himiko for the first time since he’d taken the stand. Himiko had felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up. People had looked at her with hatred before, but Arata’s was palpable. It was consuming.

“I spent so much of my life trying to make her normal… I don’t think she… If she could’ve been normal, she would be,” Fuku had answered the same question with even more tears in her eyes. “We’ve been too terrified to have another child. We… I lost my daughter almost five years ago now. I couldn’t lose another child to whatever sickness is inside of her.”

“The prosecution rests, Your Honor,” Watanabe had said. She’d rested a hand on Fuku’s shoulder before she’d walked back to her seat.

“I always hated you.” Himiko had said, her voice reached everyone in the courtroom. She’d glared at the woman that’d birthed her with hatred dripping like venom from her lips. Her words had cut sharper than any knife she’d ever aimed at a person before.

“Toga-san, stop-”

“You and dad. I’ve always hated you two. I hope you live the rest of your lives knowing that,” Himiko had spat, glaring at Fuku with over a decade’s worth of anger and rage.

“And I hope we get to see the end of yours, you monster,” Arata had spat back, standing up from his seat and shouting at Himiko in return.

“Order! Order!”

The day had ended early after that- the judge had said it’d be better for everyone to reconvene the next day before running off to the bathroom. Himiko had felt nothing but contempt seeing her mom back on the stand again. Apparently her lawyers had decided to cross-examine her. Why? What could she possibly say that’d be worth hearing? Let alone be helpful to her case? And why just her mom? Himiko would’ve guessed that if they would speak to anyone it’d be her father- he was willing to admit that he hated her. Fuku had just seemed so… pathetic.

“Toga-san, I’m incredibly sorry to have you here today. I’m sure you did everything you could as a parent,” Shirakawa had said. She’d sounded just as sorry as Watanabe had. Whose side was she on?

“Do you have a child, Shirakawa-sama,” Fuku had asked. She’d already had tears in her eyes, as if she’d thought crying would make whatever she had to say more believable.

“I do. A daughter and a young son- his Quirk might be manifesting any day now,” Shirakawa had explained, looking incredibly sorrowful and sympathetic towards Fuku.

“Just imagine one of those children turning out to be a monster. Imagine if your son’s Quirk turns him into… It was horrible,” Fuku had said, shaking her head in grief.

“I’m sure it was absolutely awful for your family. I… do have some questions, if you’re okay with answering for the court. I’m hoping these questions will show just how hard you’d tried as a mother- some people listening might not be parents themselves, you know?” Himiko had narrowed her eyes at Shirakawa. Could no one else see she was lying? About what… she wasn’t sure. She wasn’t sure about a lot these days. But she was sure Shirakawa was lying.

“Of course. I’ll answer anything to help,” Fuku had said, sitting up straight in her chair like a child getting ready to take a test.

“Good. Well, when did you learn what Himiko-san’s Quirk was,” Shirakawa had asked. Himiko had raised an eyebrow at that question. Her parents had never known-

“Oh… Um, well, around the time she’d turned five she began to develop this obsession with blood-”

“Right, right. Her cravings for blood… Toga-san, might I ask what your Quirk is?” Another odd question. What did that have to do with anything?

“Oh, I… I have a Transformation Quirk. My skin can become incredibly malleable- almost liquid? And after a few seconds it can hold its shape, sort of like wet clay,” Fuku had explained. Himiko had curiously looked at her mother at that answer. She couldn’t remember seeing the woman ever use her Quirk. She’d never realized how similar their Quirks were until then.

“And your husband’s?”

“He has an Emitter Quirk. Blood manipulation. If he can touch it, he can move small amounts. The hospital he works at petitioned for him to receive a provisional license to use it in the medical field. It’d cost a fortune, but it was worth it,” Fuku had explained. She hadn’t been curious in the slightest about where this line of questioning was headed. As far as she’d been concerned, she’d won Shirakawa over and was being given another opportunity to explain just how severely her life had been disrupted by her daughter’s monstrous behavior.

“Ah! Okay. So you two assumed that her proclivity for blood was Quirk related and brought her into Quirk Counseling-”

“No! No, we… we were urged to bring her in,” Fuku had corrected.

“What do you mean by that,” Shirakawa had asked curiously.

“Well, we… She’d started saying all these abnormal things about blood, so we brought her to a children’s psychiatrist who’d immediately recommended Quirk counseling,” Fuku had explained. Himiko had been trying hard not to fall into those memories as her mother recounted them. They weren’t pleasant.

“And they discovered her Quirk was blood-induced shapeshifting?”

“Uh… they weren’t exactly sure.” Fuku had remembered how frustrating those years had been. Entirely unsure why her daughter had been acting like this. The psychiatrists couldn’t answer, the Quirk Counselors had seemed stumped… 

“I’m not sure I understand. Can you explain to everyone what this process was?” Shirakawa had seemed genuinely curious. It had made sense- if her kid was close to five, his Quirk might manifest at any time. Quirk Counseling wasn’t something that was often discussed, even in parenting circles. It was taboo to ever even need it- as if it would reflect poorly on one’s personal record if they’d been born with a Quirk they couldn’t immediately control.

“Well… the psychiatrist had recommended Quirk Counseling. So we brought her in, and they’d run tests on her,” Fuku had explained.

“What sorts of tests? Please, I’m sure lots of parents watching this trial might wonder when the right time to bring their child into Quirk Counseling would be, and what the process looks like,” Shirakawa had practically begged Fuku to provide as many details as she could.

“Um… They’d… expose her to all sorts of things to see if her body had some sort of reaction to any of them… From what the doctors told us, Emitter Quirks are somewhat difficult to pin down because they often have a trigger that could be difficult to find.” Himiko had clenched her fists so tight her nails had torn through her skin. Difficult to find. Had they just given her some blood… Maybe all of this could’ve been avoided? Had they just let her drink… Maybe they would’ve figured it out on her first visit?

“Expose her how?”

“Well… sometimes they’d put an object in front of her, or… other times they’d do other things-”

“Like what, Toga-san? Please, be clear,” Shirakawa had encouraged.

“Well… once or twice they’d… They hit her a few times… and see if that would cause a reaction. Sometimes Transformation Quirks activate with some trauma, or Emitter Quirks will need some sort of stockpiled catalyst.” Fuku had repeated the explanation the Counselors had given her, trying to sound as professional as possible.

“So they’d hit your daughter with different objects? What else did they do to get a reaction?” Why had Shirakawa’s tone been so nice while saying things like that?

“They… Well sometimes it was necessary to scare her or stress her out- sometimes a Quirk will activate if someone is under extreme stress. Sometimes we were instructed to make sure she didn’t eat for a few days before the testing, in case that was some sort of trigger. Or to put her in… I guess… predicaments to see if her Quirk would activate at all if she felt she was unsafe.” Fuku had sounded as if she were trying her best to make what she was saying less horrific. Himiko hadn’t thought she’d been doing a good job.

“How old was she at the time,” Shirakawa had asked somberly.

“We’d started going in December, so… five months after her fifth birthday.”

“How often did you take her there?”

“Twice a week,” Fuku had said desperately, still trying to convince the entire world that she’d done everything she could as a mother. “Most families that need this service only bring their kids in once a week, but we were desperate to find out what was wrong with her!”

“How long did you bring her into Quirk Counseling?”

“Until she’d run away… for almost eight years?”

“And did they ever discover that her Quirk was blood-induced shapeshifting?” Shirakawa’s voice had taken on a slightly different tone with that question. Almost accusatory. The realization had hit Himiko like a truck. Shirakawa wasn’t lying- not really! She was-

“No! No they never knew! We didn’t know, which is why were so shocked-”

“Yes, yes, your family was incredibly shocked, we understand! We sympathize with that. However, forgive me, I have to ask. As a mother, when should I bring my son to be abused by Quirk Counselors?” Himiko’s face had lit up at that. She’d almost smiled. In fact, she was sure she had.

“Abused?!” Fuku had practically spat the accusation back at Shirakawa. “I- Himiko wasn’t being abused! They were helping her! We were helping her!”

“Right, apologies. They were helpfully hitting your daughter and helpfully putting her in dangerous situations twice a week, and helpfully starving her. All to discover her Quirk- a task they’d failed at for eight years. Toga-san, did your daughter ever protest going to the Quirk Counselors? Did she look happy when you’d bring her there,” Shirakawa had asked, looking to the audience now as if everyone already knew the answer.

“I- I… No, she… She protested every time. Sometimes we’d have to drag her into the car and child-lock the doors so she wouldn’t… She wasn’t being abused! Of course she wouldn’t want to go, but what child likes going to the doctor,” Fuku had thrown her hands in the air, as if Shirakawa wasn’t understanding something so simple.

“Toga-san, I bring my children to the doctors for vaccinations and check-ups. When they’re sick, they get medicine and bedrest. When they get a needle, they get a lollipop or a sticker or ice cream so they’re willing to go back. Did your daughter ever get a sticker after Quirk Counseling? Did you ever take her to get some ice cream?”

“I… What kind of question? … I-”

“Toga-san, you told us yesterday that you’d fled the prefecture the moment you’d heard Himiko had attacked someone for the first time. Yesterday your husband told us that he’d grown to hate to see his daughter smile. You also told us that you don’t think she would’ve ever been normal. Tell us, Toga-san… did you ever love your daughter,” Shirakawa had asked, turning back from the audience to look into Fuku’s pale gold eyes. She saw so much of the older woman’s daughter in them.

“Excuse me?! What kind of question is that?!” Fuku had stood up, absolutely disgusted by the question.

“A sincere one, Toga-san. Did you ever love your daughter Himiko? Did you ever try to support her, or offer her a hand when she was experiencing these cravings for blood? Or were you more concerned with how her cravings would affect how everyone would perceive you?” Himiko had felt like her heart had stopped beating. Shirakawa had asked a question that’d kept Himiko up nearly every night of her life. Ever since the first time she’d gone to Quirk Counseling, she’d asked herself that question over and over and over again, sobbing and crying and angrily stabbing whatever pillow or dirt floor she was sleeping on.

Did her mother ever love her?

“How could anyone be expected to love a monster like that? I wanted a normal little girl, and all she’d wanted was blood! Of course I couldn’t love her,” Fuku had shouted, glaring at Shirakawa as if she’d asked the stupidest question of her life.

Of course she didn’t love her daughter. She’d ruined everything.

The audience… didn’t seem as disgusted with Shirakawa as Fuku was. Most of them had seemed shocked. Mortified. Unable to process what they’d just heard Toga Fuku scream for the whole world to hear.

“W-wait… That’s not what I meant! I-”

“... the defense rests, Your Honor,” Shirakawa had sighed, her shoulders slumped down low. She’d gotten her answer- the answer she’d suspected all along. But it’d still been hard to hear. Hard for everyone to hear. Shirakawa had walked back to the defense's table, and Higuruma had placed a comforting hand on his protege’s shoulder.

Himiko pulled herself out of those memories as the judge reentered the courtroom and sat back down in his seat. He shuffled through his papers for a few moments before sighing. He looked frustrated- more so than he’d looked when reading Spinner’s or Mr. Compress’ names on that paper. Himiko wondered who’s name could make him so upset.

“We’ll now be hearing from… Midoriya Izuku-san Pro Hero Deku.”

Chapter Text

Izuku-kun?! Himiko turned quickly and watched as Izuku rose from his seat in the defense’s crowd. She’d been curious as to why he was wearing his hero costume for the first time today since the trial had started- he’d been wearing a normal suit every day before! Now it made sense. It wasn’t just Midoriya Izuku speaking. It was Deku as well. He was using his authority as a pro hero to try to help. Himiko’s heart swelled at that thought. A hero trying to help? If only it weren’t too late…

She watched as he whispered to All Might for a few moments, getting a reassuring thumbs up and smile from the older hero. Dynamight grumbled something as well before also giving him a thumbs up. A few whispered words from Ochako earned him a nod, and he quickly left the defense’s audience and headed for the stand. He looked so cute in his costume, the fabric hugging the muscles he’d worked so hard to carve into his body. Himiko sighed, knowing full well she’d probably never get the chance to speak with him like she had during the summer camp raid or during the final battle again. Oh well.

“Good afternoon, everyone. I um… Sorry. I’ve never been very good at public speaking,” Izuku explained, rubbing the back of his neck with a nervous smile on his face. He looked so pretty like that, and the scars on his face only made him all the more irresistible for Himiko.

“I’m sure you’re all wondering why I’m here, and speaking on Toga Himiko’s behalf. I… I understand a lot of you aren’t happy with me being here,” that earned a loud grumble of agreement from everyone in the audience. Heroes, civilians, victims. No one was happy to see Deku of all people standing up for the serial killer, terrorist, blood obsessed monster. It forced them to think that maybe they were wrong in wanting Himiko put to death. And who wanted that? “But please, let me explain.”

“Heroes… No, sorry. We… We heroes fight against bad guys every day,” he started. Somehow Izuku still found it difficult to remember to call himself a hero. That he was just as much a hero as the people he’d looked up to his entire life. More of a hero than even All Might himself- the public’s words, not his. “It’s our job, and all of us happily continue to do it despite the danger. We fought as hard as we could to take down the League of Villains. But something we all promised we’d never do- not unless it was the only way to save others- was to take lives. We… We pride ourselves on being more than the villains. On not stooping to their level. We’ve got dozens of rules to make sure that we exhaust every option possible before it ever even has to come to that.”

“Two hundred and twenty-nine heroes died at the hands of the League. That takes into account Stain’s activities, the raid against the Paranormal Liberation Front, the dozens of heroes that were murdered during and after the jailbreakings, the Final Battle against All For One’s army, and America’s number one hero Star and Stripe.” Izuku paused for a long moment, letting his respect for the deaths sit with the crowd.

“I mourn their loss. I mourn them every day. Heroes like Majestic, Native, Master Driller, Crust, and… Midnight… I often feel if I’d just been a bit stronger… A bit more like All Might…” Izuku’s voice wavered for a moment, and he looked to the crowd to see All Might urging him on. All Might and Dynamight and Ochako. Even the heroes on the prosecution’s side weren’t against him. They were just against Himiko.

“I want to take a look at the villain’s losses as well. Hawks killed Bubaigawara Jin.” The attention turned- for just a moment- to Japan’s former #2 hero. He was dressed in a burgundy suit, and sitting on the defense’s side next to Lady Nagant. He looked so different without his wings. Himiko had seen him there every day of her trial, and it always made her anger boil. She’d stopped just short of killing him during her Sad Man’s Death Parade, the Double that had slashed at him melting into goo before it could do any real damage.

Keigo Takami shrugged, diffusing the attention that was on him as nonchalantly as he always did. It made Himiko even more upset. Why was he even on this side of the audience? He’d killed Jin-kun! She didn’t want him here!

“My oldest friend, Kacchan- Dynamight… he was forced to kill All For One.” The attention shifted to Dynamight for a moment-

“THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS LOOKING AT! DEKU’S SPEAKING, EYES FORWARD,” Dynamight shouted, getting everyone’s eyes back on Deku as if they were a bunch of students who’d been distracted during class.

“Todoroki Touya died a couple of weeks after the battle from self-inflicted injuries. I… I killed Shim- … Shigaraki Tomura.” Izuku swallowed, fighting back tears at the admission. He still felt guilty for what he’d done. He still felt that if he’d just fought a little harder, he could’ve saved the young boy that All For One had corrupted.

If only…

“But Toga-san… she killed herself. She sacrificed herself to save the life of my friend- Uraraka Ochako--san. Pro Hero: Uravity. And I’m forever in her debt for that,” Izuku said, his eyes turning from the crowd to Himiko with such gratitude it felt foreign to her. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had been grateful for something she’d done.

“She’s here today because she’s been given the chance to face justice for her crimes thanks to the efforts of Uraraka-san and Hatsume-san.” Izuku had said Mei’s name, but his eyes were locked on Ochako’s. He only had eyes for her, and he was lost in those wide, watery brown pools for a long while before he continued to speak. He looked at her so much differently than how he’d looked at Himiko just a moment earlier. He looked at her differently than he looked at anyone else. Himiko was certain that they were in love, it was impossible that they weren’t.

“Two people who risked everything because they felt it was the right thing to do. Who felt that all life was sacred, regardless of whose life it was. Uraraka-san and Hatsume-san are true heroes. They… they did something that even I couldn’t do. They saved Toga Himiko… We can’t let that display of sincere heroism be in vain!” There was a murmur in the crowd. Lots of people clearly didn’t agree with what Izuku was saying, but it was hard to deny his words. It was even harder to say he was wrong considering everything that he had personally sacrificed during the final battle. The entire world had watched his arms get taken by Shigaraki’s Quirk. They’d watched him give it his all, broken and bloodied. A hero student doing more than any hero in history… Even All Might.

“Not only should we not assign Toga-san the death penalty for Uraraka-san, and Hatsume-san, and all the heroes that sacrificed their lives for what they thought was right… We should do this for Toga-san. We should do this because out of all of the villains who’d fought that day, she was the only one who’d stopped of her own accord! Iguchi Suichi fought until he couldn’t fight any longer! Todoroki Touya fought until he’d all but killed himself! Shigaraki…” Izuku cleared his throat, and recollected himself.

“Toga Himiko stopped on her own. She called off her Sad Man’s Legion. She put down her weapons and in doing so saved dozens of hero’s lives. She’d turned the tide of the battle towards the villains all on her own, and by her own will, she turned it back towards the heroes. Her actions gave us a chance to stop Shigaraki Tomura. Her actions gave us a chance to save the world that we otherwise wouldn’t have had. Without her relenting, we never would’ve won that day.” Again, even more heroes seemed frustrated by Izuku’s words. Not because he was lying, but because they all knew how true they were. They’d all been there during the battle. They’d known how impossible the odds had been. So many of them had been absolutely overwhelmed by Himiko’s Sad Man’s Death Parade.

“Toga-san proved to the entire world that she has a heart that day. That she’s just as human as the rest of us. She gave her life to save Uraraka-san… Toga Himiko is my hero… I hope you can all take that into account and offer her some leniency with whatever sentencing you deliver. Thank you for listening.” Izuku wiped a couple of tears from his eyes before standing and bowing towards the crowd and then the judge. Always so polite and cordial. Always so grateful. Himiko watched as Izuku walked back to his seat next to Ochako and All Might. Watching him made her heart hurt all over again. He’d rejected her feelings…

Himiko couldn’t remember a time where she wasn’t in love with Izuku Midoriya. He was so strong and kind and selfless, and so, so pretty. Even Stain had recognized him as a true hero. Being in love with him just felt right. Well… okay, maybe she could remember a time before that. But only because she’d been silly and in love with someone else…

Himiko had felt like she’d seen a ghost. He hadn’t been in the audience earlier- or at least, she hadn’t noticed him? There was a deep scar stretching across his cheek that split his upper lip in two. His skin was sickly pale- as if he didn’t go out much, or get much sun. Still, Himiko could’ve recognized him anywhere.

“My name is S-Saito So-Soma… I… I went to middle school with Toga Himiko.” Soma’s gray eyes had been wide with fear, and he couldn’t help but stutter even as he said his own name. He’d practically been shuddering in his seat and his eyes would snap to Himiko’s every other second, as if he were terrified she’d lunge towards him at any moment and finish what she’d started.

“Are you okay, Saito-san,” Watanabe had asked, taking a small step to her right and blocking Soma’s view of Himiko with her body. “You look a little nervous.” 

“I-I am, ma’am, s-sorry,” he’d stuttered.

“Why are you nervous, Saito-san,” she’d asked, making a show of stepping out of the way so Soma was forced to look at Himiko again. He’d practically flinched as she did so, showing the crowd just how terrified he was of the younger woman.

“I… I’m s-sorry. I haven’t seen T-Toga since… since s-she…” He could hardly even get the words out, as if just mentioning it would've made it happen all over again. 

“Please, tell the court what happened to you,” Watanabe had encouraged.

“R-Right… well… I was fourteen. I… I’d gotten into a f-fight at school. Someone in my class had called Toga-san a freak, and I told him that he was wrong. That he was being mean and cruel. I… I told him to take it back. I… I hit him.” The memories of that day haunted both his dreams and his waking hours, and he could recall every moment as if it’d happened yesterday.

“So you defended Toga Himiko? You protected her from one of your own classmates,” Watanabe had asked, getting the crowd pulled into Soma’s story. Himiko couldn't help but feel frustrated. Everyone already knew how this story ended. Everyone already knew what she’d done.

“I… yes,” Soma had said, his head down as he'd answered. It'd sounded as if he'd regretted ever being kind to her. To be honest, he likely did.

“And what happened next, Saito-san?”

“I… I was walking back to class a few hours later…” Soma had looked at Himiko and swallowed before closing his wide, gray eyes, taking a deep breath, and starting again.

“Toga was waiting for me a few feet outside the classroom. Like… like she’d been planning the entire thing. She asked me if I was okay. I told her yeah, I was fine. That Hamada had been rude to her and that she didn’t deserve that. I… She told me she loved me. I kinda just… laughed. I’d never been confessed to or anything before and… I told her I didn’t really know her, but we could hang out after class if she wanted.” Soma had gone quiet for a few moments, seemingly overwhelmed by his memories.

“Then… she whispered something. I almost hadn’t heard it, and what I’d thought I’d heard… It didn’t make sense. I asked her to repeat it- I got closer because her voice was so low! She… she’d asked for my blood!” Soma had seemed to be panicking as he relived the memories. They’d seemed particularly traumatic to him.

“I hadn’t even noticed she’d had it in her hand until… Until she… She attacked me!”

“How did she attack you, Saito-san,” Watanabe had asked, looking back at the crowd. Himiko could barely even pretend to be interested in this at all. She’d already heard what the news had said about her. No one had ever cared to hear her side of the story. Why she’d done it… Did it even matter?

“She sliced me across the chest! With a boxcutter! Not just once but… She… she kept slicing, and slicing, and slicing! I tried to shout. To run away. But… I was so shocked. I didn’t know why she was attacking me! I was nice to her,” Soma had been shouting as he retold the story. His voice had been cracking with frustration.

“What happened next?”

“I… I fell to the floor. I was in so much pain. And… the doctors said I would’ve bled out if I hadn’t… If I hadn’t gotten to the hospital in time. I needed a blood transfusion- seven units of blood, and over a thousand stitches across my body…”

“Saito-san… Can you show the court your injuries? Can you show the court what Toga Himiko did to you that day? What you have to live with for every day of your life,” Watanabe had asked. But just like with Camie, it hadn’t exactly sounded like a request.

I… Yeah… Okay,” Soma had mumbled. He’d stood up and unbuttoned and removed his suit jacket. Then untied his tie. Finally, he’d unbuttoned his undershirt. The entire courtroom seemed to gasp as they looked at the patchwork of scars that lined Soma’s torso and arms. They were deep and stood out against his pale skin. Ugly reminders of what his kindness had cost him. Tears filled Soma’s eyes as everyone looked at him in horror. It was a feeling he’d never get used to.

“You can get dressed now, son,” Watanabe had said, unable to look at Soma’s scars herself any longer. The crowd had waited for Soma to get his clothes back on before beginning again.

“Saito-san, did Toga Himiko at any point realize she’d hurt you? That she was going to kill you? Did she try to get help for you after she’d attacked you,” Watanabe had asked, turning her back to Soma now as she locked eyes with Himiko. Himiko was too busy watching Soma. Something felt… incredibly different about him. And not just his age…

Himiko looked back to Izuku. She’d noticed from the moment Soma had taken the stand, that Izuku had been somewhat uncomfortable in his seat. They could’ve been brothers, really. They looked so much alike. But… not at all, either. It was hard to explain, but the difference between Izuku and Soma was like night and day. Same sky, same horizon, but so, so different.

“No… No she was…” Soma’s voice had been a whisper, not at all audible in the courtroom.

“Louder, please, Saito-san. The world deserves to know this.”

“She was drinking my blood. She’d gotten a straw and had it in my wounds and was drinking my blood.” Soma had taken a few minutes after that to catch his breath. As if the story still sounded foreign to him. As if he still couldn’t believe that it’d happened at all, let alone to him.

“I passed out… One of the students that’d found me told me that she’d had a horrific look on her face. That she was crying but like… happy. That… she looked so excited! I would’ve died that day… Toga Himiko would’ve killed me if no one had been in the hallway on their way to the bathroom.” He’d turned his wide gray eyes onto Himiko, and the realization struck her like a lightning bolt. When she’d last seen Saito, she’d thought he was attractive. Cute. Sweet. Now? Even with his scars… She didn’t feel a thing for him.

“You have your chance right now, Saito-san. It’s been years since she’d hurt you. What would you like to say to her,” Watanabe had asked pointedly.

“I… I just want to ask why. Why did you attack me? I have these scars on my face and chest and stomach and arms, and I have to live my entire life… I just wanna know why…”

Himiko had felt like a deer in the headlights. Years ago, she’d had some reason. Something about love and blood and wanting to be him… Now? She didn’t feel any of those things. She had no idea why she’d done that.

The judge called for a lunch break. It’d been kinda sudden- there was only one person left to speak, and Himiko was positive that the judge would just want to listen to whoever it was, make his decision and leave. Instead, he quickly got up and walked out of the courtroom, giving some of the audience time to get some lunch. Others chose to use the half hour to talk and mumble and glare at Himiko. She could tell most of the people in the crowd still wanted her dead, but a few of them seemed to be less angry. As if they’d changed their minds just listening to Deku. It probably wouldn’t be enough- the judge still had to be convinced, after all, but it was nice that Izuku-kun’s words had reached at least a few people.

That left Himiko wondering who’d be the final speaker on her behalf. The fact that they’d let Spinner-kun and Mr. Compress speak already seemed unbelievable. The fact that Izuku-kun had wanted to speak on her behalf was… touching. But who was last? Who did Higuruma and Shirakawa think would really seal the deal on getting Himiko a lesser sentence? Himiko looked at each person sitting on the defense’s side of the crowd. Definitely not Dynamight. She doubted Tsu-chan or Ryukyu would speak for her. That left… All Might? He would definitely be a strong voice speaking on her behalf. But… he didn’t know her. It couldn’t be Lady Nagant. Or Hawks. Or any of the few faces she didn’t immediately recognize. That only left…

No…

The thought of Ochako speaking for her… it was impossible. Not after the trial. Not after how devastated she’d looked…

Some members of the crowd had already been shouting in anger and frustration as the next witness had taken the witness stand. From the moment Himiko had heard his name she’d been creeped out all over again, exactly the way she’d been when she’d first met him. He didn’t have the same contingent of heroes that Spinner or Mr. Compress had had- just a single officer- but that didn’t make him any less creepy or dangerous.

The judge had to bang his gavel to get everyone to quiet down.

“Proceed, Watanabe-san,” the judge had demanded.

“Thank you, Your Honor. Please, explain what happened that day,” Watanabe had started before glaring over her shoulder as Shirakawa stood up in her seat.

“Are we seriously doing this? Objection! This witness isn’t credible in the slightest. Hanabata Koku has already been convicted of being one of the lead lieutenants of the Meta Liberation Army, as well as the Paranormal Liberation Front!” Shirakawa’s voice had been loud and clear as it resounded through the courtroom, and for the first time she’d even had the crowd on her side. Everyone had already seemed angry and frustrated at seeing Hanabata brought to the witness stand. Maybe they could get any testimony he might give thrown out completely. Maybe they could even turn any testimony he might give away from Himiko and onto him instead?

“And I’ve already been serving out my sentence, Shirakawa-sama. I’ve no incentive to lie in my testimony concerning Toga Himiko’s actions,” Hanabata had said with a smug smirk on his greasy, slimy face. Himiko got the ick from nearly every politician she’d ever met- a bunch of liars, yet, somehow not even good at it. They made her skin crawl.

“As the witness has stated, he’s already been tried, convicted, and sentenced for his own crimes,” Watanabe had explained, glaring at Hanabata for having interrupted her. Clearly she hadn’t been particularly happy about having the man as a witness, but she had to put up with it. “There is no plea bargain or possibility of a reduced sentence in exchange for whatever testimony he gives today. And having a Paranormal Liberation Front insider speak might shed some light on the actions of our defendant. ”

“I’ll allow it,” the judge had said with a shrug.

Shirakawa looked at Higuruma expectantly, but the man stayed quiet. His eyes had narrowed at Watanabe as he’d examined her for a few moments. He’d given Himiko the odd impression that he’d figured something out. Like a lightbulb had flickered above his head. Whatever it was, he wasn’t giving it away.

“Thank you, Your Honor. I do believe that this courtroom deserves to hear about one of the lesser known instances of Toga Himiko-”

“Hanabata, just answer my questions,” Watanabe had hissed. She clearly had far less tolerance for this witness than any of the others she’d talked to previously. Himiko had wondered why she’d even agreed to this in the first place.

“Of course, of course,” Hanabata had said apologetically, putting his hands up with that same weasley grin that could never be wiped off his face for long.

“What happened in Deika City?”

“You see, it was Yotsubashi-san’s idea. After Chisaki’s Hassaikai fell and the Yakuza boss was incarcerated, Yotsubashi believed it’d be a good idea to reach out to Shigaraki’s League for some sort of a partnership. We weren’t Yakuza thugs. We were a movement with pride, and an ideal to live in a world where Quirks could be used freely, without the need for licensing.” His tone had been large and grandiose, but it was falling on deaf ears. Most people in the crowd were strongly for the current society where people were only allowed to use Quirks if they were licensed to do so. The horror stories of how society had nearly collapsed before were still told to frighten naughty children. No one in the crowd was willing to hear any debate on the issue, especially not from one of the men that’d led the Paranormal Liberation Front and their attack against modern Japan.

“Kizuki-san… the poor woman… She’d taken a liking to Toga-chan’s story long before they’d had the chance to meet. The whole country had heard about her attack on poor Saito-kun, but Kizuki-san knew there must be more behind such a story. She was a reporter at heart, you understand?” Again, no one had really seemed interested in the sensationalization of his story. Himiko doubted he’d catch on.

“She was passionate, and perhaps a little desperate to hear about how Toga-chan’s Quirk Counseling hadn’t predicted such a severe mental break in their patient- maybe they’d even caused it? You all must understand, Kizuki-san truly did believe that poor Toga-chan was worth the story. Worth the questions. Worth so much to our movement. She was the living embodiment of the horrors of our current system. Of what happens when that system chews up a young, wayward soul and spits them out without regard for their own mental wellbeing.” Himiko had glared at the man, trying to understand why he was saying any of this. How could he possibly be trying to make that woman sound sympathetic? She’d been a crazy-

“And what happened to Chizuki-san,” Watanabe had asked, her voice wavering for a moment before she caught herself. That’d rang in Himiko’s ears, but she was too focused on Hanabata and his slimy, greasy, weasley face.

“Oh… well, I suppose it might be preferable to the court for you all to watch what happened next. Words alone can’t express how… awful the monster before you all truly is,” he’d said with a small chuckle. He wasn’t even good at hiding how remorseless he was.

“How did you come into possession of this piece of evidence, Hanabata,” Watanabe had asked, trying to keep him focused on her questions.

“Kizuki-san’s closest ally was Miyami Hana- a woman with a Quirk that had blessed her with incredibly steady hands. She could’ve been an amazing surgeon if she’d ever been allowed to use her Quirk without the licensing that’s gatekept behind money and privilege. In fact, she had been training to be a surgeon in secret in Deika City.” He’d still been trying to sell his politics. The worst part about it? It was exactly how Himiko felt. She’d always wished she’d lived in a world that didn’t hate her. It was why she’d joined the League. She just knew that that sales pitch coming from Hanabata would only sink the chances of the entire cause.

“She had a passion for photography and film, so she worked alongside Kizuki-san to cover any story worth telling… She… well, she was recording until her final moments,” he’d sighed, sitting back in his seat with his arms crossed over his chest. Again, not even good at pretending to appear sad about the deaths of Hana or Kizuki.

“The evidence uncovered in Deika City will be disturbing to most viewers. However I encourage you all to watch closely,” Watanabe had warned, pointing the remote and everyone’s attention towards the television screen in the courtroom.

The footage had started with an explosion, recorded from a few feet behind Chitose Kizuki- the woman better known as Curious. The explosion barely seemed powerful enough to harm, but the blue-skinned woman was instantly blasted high into the sky, as if some other force had propelled her like a baseball.

Then the camera panned to Himiko, except-

“No…” Ochako’s voice had barely been a whisper, but it’d still been audible over the hush that’d taken the crowd. Everyone watched as the brown haired, brown eyed, Uraraka Ochako rushed through dozens of stunned people, lifting them all up and into the air with a flick of her wrist. The camera was incredibly steady as it followed Ochako’s path, a testament to Miyami’s Quirk. The final person to be touched by the rogue hero student was the camerawoman herself, who began to flail and panic as she cleared the rooftops of the nearest buildings.

Ochako’s eyes were full of tears as she watched over a dozen people float high in the sky with the use of her Quirk. The camera quickly focused on the Ochako on the street down below. Half of her face had melted off, revealing half of Himiko’s feral smile underneath. Her lips were moving, but it was impossible to hear exactly what she’d said from over a hundred feet in the air.

Then… Then Himiko-Ochako pressed her fingertips together.

Ochako watched just long enough to notice that Hana never took the camera’s focus away from Chitose as they fell. Instead, the younger woman had desperately reached out to her as they plummeted. It was over in a second, with the cracked camera lens focused on Chitose’s broken body on the ground below.

Ochako ran. She’d gotten up from her seat and had run out of the courtroom as quickly as she could, unable to watch any further. She felt horrible. Violated. As if it’d been her fault that all of those people had died. It’d been her Quirk, after all. She’d never meant to use it to hurt others, but Himiko had used it… Perverted it… Used it to take lives instead of save them.

Himiko had told her once that she’d done this, but Ochako hadn’t believed her. At the time she’d chalked it up to the crazy rambling of a villain. Surely Himiko had just been trying to goad some kind of reaction out of her? To make her falter during their fight? The murders had never even been reported. No bodies had ever been found at Deika City. But seeing it now… It was undeniable.

For a moment, Ochako had wished she’d never learned about the Deika City homicides. Then a wave of guilt had washed over her for feeling that way- not knowing about the homicides didn’t absolve her of her part in them. Whatever part she had played… She ran out of the courtroom as fast as she could without even casting a glance over her shoulder back at either Izuku or Himiko. Maybe if she had she’d have noticed that she hadn’t been the only one crying. Izuku’s bright green eyes were already filled with tears, but… for the first time since the proceedings had started… So were Himiko’s.

There wasn’t a chance in hell Ochako would speak for Himiko… Not after that…

Chapter Text

The day after Hanabata’s testimony, Shirakawa, Higuruma, Watanabe and Himiko had all gathered in the judge’s office. Higuruma had had a small smirk on his face- the first emotion other than tired Himiko had ever been able to read on him.

“When were you planning on telling Judge Nagase, Watanabe-san,” Higuruma had asked, his dark eyes narrowed as he looked the prosecutor up and down. He’d had this air about him like someone who’d just solved a case. Like someone who had finally connected all of the pieces.

“What are you talking about old man,” Watanabe had hissed, arms crossed over her chest as she waited for the defense lawyer to explain himself. “No eleventh hour motion is going to dismiss the fact that your client is a murderous-”

“We did some digging last night,” Shirakawa had interrupted with a smirk. “It was difficult to find these specific records. I imagine you paid a pretty penny to bury your name change-”

“I’m married, of course I’ve had a name change!”

“Your first name change, Kizuki-san,” Higuruma had said hollowly. The prosecutor had hissed, practically ready to snap at the man.

“How dare you-”

“She should’ve never taken this case, Your Honor. There’s no way we can proceed under these circumstances! She has a personal vendetta against Toga Himiko, and she should’ve recused herself-”

“Nonsense! What prosecutor could you possibly find that hasn’t been affected by the League of Villains in some way? The machinations of All For One span centuries! The results of the Jaku raid leveled an entire city. The jailbreakings, All For One’s rampage, Shigaraki’s efforts, the final battle itself! I’m lucky enough to only have lost an estranged sister. If I’m not impartial enough to take this case, then you’re not impartial enough to act as Toga Himiko’s defense! Higuruma, you lost an uncle during the destruction of Jaku, did you not? And Shirakawa, isn’t your cousin one of the UA Class 1B hero students?” Watanabe had clearly done her own research, and had been expecting this exact line of attack.

“You can’t possibly be comparing a cousin by marriage and an uncle Higuruma hasn’t seen in decades to your own older sister,” Shirakawa had laughed incredulously. “A sister that you grew up with! A sister that-”

“A sister that ruined our family with her pursuit of these deranged stories! Her ridiculous support for the Hearts and Mind party- terrorists! I haven’t even seen Chitose in a decade! In fact, I was happy when I’d heard she’d passed. I’m not doing this for her! I’m doing this for Japan! Something you two wouldn’t understand,” Watanabe had hissed, fists clenched as if she were ready to solve this issue with the defense attorneys the old fashioned way.

“Your Honor, the correct path forward would be a mistrial, with different prosecution,” Higuruma had urged.

“As if a different prosecutor could make half the case I’ve presented-”

“Enough,” the judge had sighed, leaning back in his seat and staring up at the ceiling. This had clearly caught him by surprise, and it’d taken him a few minutes to think things over. Himiko could see in his eyes that he really was reconsidering everything. Himiko hadn’t been sure what a mistrial meant. Would the case be thrown out? Would they have to do it all over again? Did she even want that? Would Camie or Saito or her parents even be able to speak again? Would she be able to be convicted of some of her worst crimes without their testimony?

The judge’s brown eyes closed and he’d taken a deep, steadying breath. Himiko knew instantly what he’d decided. It’d been written all over his face.

“Watanabe-san, you should’ve recused yourself. That much is obvious-”

“Your Honor!”

“However there’s no argument here that she’s done anything unfitting of her position. She does also have a point that it’d be a chore to find anyone who wasn’t affected by the League’s actions… My family cat has only recently returned after disappearing during the Jaku evacuation. Should I recuse myself as well?” The judge shrugged and sighed again, the weight of the world seemingly on his shoulders.

“We’re not going to deny Toga Himiko’s victims justice based on Watanabe-san’s… shortsightedness. The case must proceed,” he’d sighed, his voice had been loud and clear. He wasn’t going to change his mind.

“Judge Nagase!”

“Your Honor!”

“Enough, Higuruma-san. Shirakawa-san. You’ve done your job. You’ve both defended Toga Himiko better than anyone could’ve ever thought possible. Neither of you should feel disappointment for your actions. However, we must move forward.”

How much more obvious did it have to be that the death penalty was already on the horizon?

The judge returned after a half hour. It was pretty obvious by the way he walked into the courtroom that he just wanted to go home. There wasn’t much left to say, but at least Himiko could see who the final person speaking on her behalf was. Maybe it’d be Rock Lock? She’d heard that he’d let Lady Nagant help during the war! Or maybe-

“Shirakawa-san… Higuruma-san… It looks as if your final speaker isn’t here,” Judge Nagase said, his voice somber as he looked towards the defense attorneys.

“Yes, well… As we said earlier, their speech was completely discretionary,” Higuruma sighed, adjusting his tie as he spoke. That made sense. Even as a part of the League, Himiko had only made six friends. Four were dead, and the two left alive had already talked. No way anyone else would be willing to speak on her behalf. No way at all.

People hated her. Japan hated her. They hated Toga Himiko. Sometimes it felt like she was born to be hated. Her parents, the boy she’d liked, the doctors around her… Everyone in the world had all hated Toga-

“Sorry!” The courtroom doors slammed open, and Himiko snapped out of her depressive spiral. She looked over her shoulder and her heart seemed to freeze as she realized who was running into the courtroom.

“I’m here! I would like to speak for Toga-san!” Uraraka Ochako was walking as quickly as she could without running while in the black courtroom outfit she was wearing. Himiko had thought she’d looked pretty, if not a little boring in the black skirt and blazer. The pink undershirt and headband she was wearing at least made her look more like Ochako than just anyone else in the courtroom. 

“Uravity, it’s not necessary if you-”

“I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK, PLEASE!” Ochako shouted even louder, rudeness be damned. She skidded to a stop a few inches in front of Himiko’s seat. She took a half-step back and reached out for Himiko to take her hand. Himiko was terrified. Was this a joke? Some kind of game? Was this-

“Manju cookies,” Ochako explained with a small smile, opening her hands so Himiko could see what she’d been offering her. “From the lunch area… I’m not sure, but I think you liked these the most? You always ate them whenever I brought them while you were recovering. I didn’t want to take any before everyone had grabbed their fill…”

Himiko nodded, absolutely speechless as she took the cookies.

She loved manju cookies.

“Okay. Apologies. The last person to speak on Toga Himiko-jukeisha’s behalf will be Uraraka Ochako- Pro hero: Uravity.” Judge Nagase seemed worried. Like he didn’t think Ochako should do this. Everyone already knew what happened during the battle. Everyone had seen how near death Ochako had been. Speaking up on Himiko’s behalf seemed… 

Izuku watched proudly as Ochako walked with confidence towards the witness stand. She reminded him so much of that time she’d stood up for him. Begged the people of Japan to reconsider letting him inside UA’s walls. To let the school continue being his home. His hero academy. It almost brought tears to his eyes all over again.

“No crying, Young Midoriya,” All Might said with a small, knowing grin. Dynamight gently elbowed his friend, forcing Deku to sit up straight and choke back the tears that were threatening to fall. Tsu offered him a tissue that he took gratefully. Himiko couldn’t help but think how nice it was to have such caring friends.

Ochako sat at the witness stand and took a deep breath to calm her nerves. She’d never been super excited about public speaking herself, but this had to be perfect. Himiko’s life depended on it.

“I’m sorry I’m late.” That got a small chuckle out of the crowd, but Himiko tilted her head at those words. She remembered the last time Ochako had said them to her. During the final battle, when she’d apologized for not reaching out sooner. She’d said it with that same tone of voice… Did that mean something? Or was Himiko reading too much into-

“Thank you, Judge Nagase, for giving me a chance to speak. And thank you Higuruma-sensei and Shirakawa-sensei, you two have done a fantastic job supporting Toga-san. Watanabe-sensei as well, you’ve done a great job fighting for justice- I can see how important it is to you.” The prosecutor huffed before acknowledging Ochako’s thanks with a nod. She could already tell where this speech would be going, and the young woman’s kindness would suck the entire crowd into her words. “And thank you everyone in the audience for coming. Heroes, witnesses, victims… I… I know we all want to see justice done today.”

“I, um… I’m not as good a speaker as Deku-kun is. But, I’d like to… maybe…” Ochako took a breath, cleared her throat, and started again.

“My parents were poor… My father worked in construction, and there were days where they’d both look so exhausted… Days they couldn’t pretend to smile… Even when I was little, I wanted to try to help them… To protect the smiles of those important to me. If you asked them about it now, they’d say they were sorry that I ever felt the need to protect them- they’re my parents. But I think because they were my parents, I would’ve felt the need to protect them no matter what…” Ochako’s eyes met the gaze of her mother and father in the crowd. They were in the row behind All Might and Ryukyu, sitting next to Izuku’s mom Inko and providing silent support for their children who’d grown up so much over the past year.

“At first, I’d only wanted to be a hero because I thought my Quirk could help them make money.” Ochako laughed at that, lost in the memory of the time she’d told this story to her friends. “Selfish… I know. But I wanted to see them smile more, so I did everything I could to get my license. I studied hard, I got good grades, and when the time came, I applied to UA the first chance I could.”

“I would’ve failed the entrance exam. There was a giant robot- kind of a roadblock that everyone else just avoided… I wouldn’t have been able to get out of the way in time. I… Deku-kun saved me…” Her eyes met Izuku’s and her voice caught in her chest for a moment. She’d never told him this next part, and her cheeks reddened just a bit as she recounted the memory. “I tried to give him all of my points. I begged UA to give him even half my points after I heard he hadn’t made a single point during the entrance exam. I thought he’d failed for sure! But… Well, it’s really hard to deny how hard Deku-kun works towards a goal when he sets his mind to it. Even UA had to give him enough rescue points to pass after watching him on the field.”

“Every day at school I saw the people around me trying as hard as they could to get stronger. Strong enough to save everyone they could. I’m… honored to have such amazing friends. Such amazing heroes… I don’t think my life would be the same without any one of them.” Tears welled up in the corners of Ochako’s eyes as she spoke about her friends. She really, truly did believe that they’d changed her life.

“I… I don’t count myself among them. I don’t think I’m a hero. Can I tell you guys why?” The whole audience was already wrapped up in Ochako’s speech. She could’ve told them anything, and they’d be all but forced to agree.

“I met Toga Himiko during the summer camp raid. She’d attacked me and Tsu-chan with a knife. I was terrified of her! She was smiling so wide, and she looked so happy to be trying to hurt us, I… I don’t know. Half the forest was on fire, the other half was covered in toxic gas. We knew there were villains around that wanted to kill us, and… and then Toga-san was trying to hurt us. It was one of the scariest nights of my life… I was so scared of her…” Himiko remembered that night like it was yesterday. It was the night she’d first met Izuku. The night she’d first met Ochako and Tsu-chan. Had she really been so scary? She’d only been trying to get some blood…

“I think a real hero would’ve reached out to her that night. A real hero would’ve swallowed their fear and tried to talk to her. Toga-san? Do you remember what you told me then? About having a crush on someone? About being in love? … You were right. Kinda… I do wanna be more like the people I love. But… maybe not the same way you do… But I’d love for you to tell me about it some time.” Ochako’s eyes were locked on Himiko’s and she was positive her heart had stopped. Ochako had captured her very soul and she couldn’t look away. Yes, she did remember their conversation. She’d always remember it. And maybe Ochako was right- maybe she didn’t understand exactly how Himiko felt about love and romance… But she was willing to listen.

“The second time I ever met Toga Himiko was during the Jaku battle. She’d tricked me, and cornered me in a house. She’d… she’d wanted to talk to me again. She had a question to ask, and I called her stupid… No, no I said her question was stupid. She’d asked me what I’d intended to do to her. I… I wasn’t sure why she was asking that at the time, but… I learned a little later… She’d just lost a friend… She needed to know… That heroes were better.” Himiko shed a couple of tears at that. Ochako was right. That had been part of why she’d run off to find her. She’d been dying to know after Hawks had killed Jin. Did the hero not see her friend as a person? Did Ochako not see her as a person? It felt… odd… to realize now just how much Ochako had understood her. 

“I’d pushed her away… Again. What kind of hero does that? Push someone away who’s practically begging for help? I failed a second time… I… I guess I still have a lot to learn about being a hero. I hope classes start back up at UA soon,” Ochako chuckled to herself, rubbing a few tears from her eyes with the back of her hand.

“The day of the final battle… I finally gathered the courage to talk to her. To explain that… I was wrong to reject her so strongly. That I’d failed as a hero, and that I needed a second chance- or, I guess, a third chance to make things right between us.” There were a few more tears in Ochako’s eyes now, but she didn’t bother to try to hide them. 

“I saw you crying, Himiko… I only found you because I was able to follow your tears. Your doubles weren’t crying, but you were… Isn’t that funny?” Each time Ochako spoke to Himiko directly, she could feel her entire body shudder. Like it was a physical force that warmed her from within every time. Himiko lifted her eyepatch, wiping her own eyes with the back of her hand for a few moments before Shirakawa offered her a tissue.

“Zero Gravity isn’t a power meant to be used to hurt others… It’s a power meant to rescue people in need! So I reached out to her… I reached out because I’d never seen someone in such desperate need of a friend. And at the end… When she had the chance to do what she’d wanted to do her whole life… Instead she stopped and chose to save me… Doesn’t that make us friends now? In some small way? Doesn’t that mean something?” Ochako’s voice cracked as it rose during that last sentence. She took another deep breath, doing her best to keep her nerves under control. She couldn’t ruin this speech, and there was still more yet to say.

“I can’t pretend to accept every part of her… I don’t understand how she can hurt others so easily. I don’t understand why she feels the way she does about blood. I don’t understand why she wants to become someone she loves so desperately, when who she is is just as worthy of love…”

Himiko wasn’t someone who cried often. She cried an entire lifetime’s worth of tears in the years after she’d run away from home, and she’d long thought they’d all dried up since. But hearing Ochako’s words… just as worthy of love… Himiko sobbed, crying into her napkin as Ochako continued her speech. She honestly wasn’t sure if she’d ever believed that about herself. All she could really be sure of was that Ochako wasn’t lying.

“But I can’t pretend I didn’t see her smile either. I can’t pretend that there isn’t someone worth learning about in Himiko… If I only had the chance to know her… I did get to learn a few things about her, during our fight. The first thing she told me about herself was that she falls in love easily. What kind of villain falls in love with the people they’re meant to hurt? She’s not a very good villain at all…” That teased a small chuckle out of Ochako. No, not a very good villain at all.

“She was told her whole life not to smile! I can’t imagine how hard a life she must’ve lived… Being told that even expressing joy was wrong at every turn…” Ochako couldn’t help but glance for just a moment at the Togas. It was hard to not be frustrated with them, but this wasn’t about blame. This couldn’t be about blame. It had to be about moving forward. “And it’s a shame, because she’s got such a beautiful smile… I can’t think of a smile I want to protect more right now than hers…” This was too much. Far too much. Himiko couldn’t believe that someone like Ochako was saying all of these things about her. Yes, Spinner and Mr. Compress and Izuku had all been incredibly kind in their speeches, but Ochako’s words were so much more intimate… How could she not be lying? How could she honestly mean these things?

“I won’t drop anyone… no matter how dangerous or cruel or sad they might be, I won’t leave them to hit rock bottom on their own. My Quirk is meant to rescue people in need! Himiko Toga is in need! Isn’t she deserving of my help!?” Ochako’s voice cracked again and she took another breath to steady herself.  “I’ve told her once that she was the cutest girl in the whole world… I don’t think she remembers… She kinda died a few minutes after it and was in a coma for a few months after that. ”

“I’m a terrible hero, and I’ve got a lot to learn. I have a crush on a boy but I don’t know how to tell him… And I think Himiko- my rival in romance- has a beautiful smile… I… guess I’m kind of weird, aren’t I? Sorry… Sorry, I… The last time I spoke to a big crowd like this, I had a megaphone and I was fighting for the life of someone I cared about. I’m doing it again, and I don’t think it’s any easier this time. I don’t think I’m any better at it. But I need to say, from the bottom of my heart, Toga Himiko is my hero. She gave me a third chance to reach out and help her- a chance I really didn’t deserve. She saved my life. Please… Please give Himiko the chance to smile freely… Thank you.” Ochako wiped a couple of tears from her eyes, before looking to the rest of the crowd. A few people had tears in their eyes. A few people seemed frustrated or upset. A few looked even more uncomfortable than they had when Judge Nagase had first read her name out loud. Ochako couldn’t be sure if her words had moved anyone. All she could do was hope. She took a deep breath and returned to her seat on the defense’s side of the audience.

It was time for Judge Nagase to make his decision.

The older man sighed heavily and sat back in his seat for a long while. He’d listened to dozens of witnesses over the court proceedings. Most had been witnesses of Himiko’s worst actions. But… he had listened to four people who truly seemed to care for the young woman. Half of them he could’ve easily disregarded- just two more terrorists. Two more murderers. But Izuku? Ochako? No… he had to listen to one more person.

“Higuruma-san. Shirakawa-san. I… have one request of the defense,” he said, sitting back up in his seat and leaning forward. The entire crowd seemed to hold their breath as the man spoke.

“Yes, Your Honor,” Higuruma said curiously, raising an eyebrow at the judge.

“I’d like to hear from your client. I’d like to hear from Toga Himiko-jukeisha.”

“Uh, Your Honor… I don’t think-”

“We haven’t discussed this with her,” Shirakawa said quickly. Maybe they could buy another day before the judge sentenced her if they could agree they needed a few hours to coach Himiko on what to say.

“Precisely why I’d like to hear from her right now. If she’s willing to speak, of course,” Judge Nagase said. His tone was fairly clear. Either she could speak now, or the judge would deliver his sentencing today.

“Yes… Yes, of course, Your Honor,” Shirakawa said, clearing her throat before standing from her seat. “Our client, Toga Himiko-san would be-”

“Toga-san. Listen carefully,” Higuruma whispered, doing his best to seem lowkey as he spoke under Shirakawa’s speech to the judge. He kept his eyes focused on the judge, but leaned just a little closer to his client to make sure she could hear every word.

“You are to say thank you. Thank everyone for the time they’ve dedicated to showing up to hear your friends speak for you. Show remorse. Apologize for your actions. Say you’re willing to spend all your time in Tartarus to repay Japan for the damage you caused and the people you’ve hurt,” he explained, doing her best to speak as clearly and urgently as he could. Himiko would only have one shot at this.

“Our client, Toga Himiko-san, has had a lot of time to think over the past couple of weeks,” Shirakawa said loudly, doing her best to stall for time. Himiko almost chuckled at that. These two worked well with each other. “She’s expressed to us a sincere belief that-”

“Toga-san… Your life is in your hands now. You have to make the world believe that you’re sorry for your actions-”

“Shirakawa-san. If your client isn’t ready to speak, that’s fine. I can just make my decision-”

“Your Honor! Our client is just getting her wits to speak now. We apologize for taking a few moments to extend our gratitude to the courts.” Higuruma explained, straightening Himiko’s eyepatch before signaling for Shirakawa to take her to the witness stand.

“I’m sure Higuruma-san already gave you pointers. All I can say is… believe what you say. And say what you believe,” Shirakawa whispered. She wheeled the younger woman up to the witness stand, fussed with her dress a little, and took a step back. This was Himiko’s show now.

Himiko looked out on the crowd and fidgeted a bit with her eyepatch. She still wasn’t used to wearing it, and it felt a little itchy after having it on for so long today. She took a few moments to reflect on what Higuruma and Shirakawa had told her. Thank everyone, apologize, be grateful, say what she believed… How could she possibly think up a speech that hit all of those points on the spot? Her heart sank as she realized something for the first time since the trial had begun.

She didn’t want to die.

“Toga-jukeisha… Is there anything at all you’d like to say to the people of Japan? Anything you’d like to express to the world before I deliver my verdict?” Himiko frowned as she looked at… they’d called him Judge Nagase? She doubted she’d remember his name by tomorrow. She honestly didn’t care about how he felt about her. All that really mattered was…

She looked into the crowd. She locked eyes with Izuku and Ochako. Two people who she’d tried to hurt. Tried to stab and bloody and drink their blood. Two people who she desperately wanted to become. To embody. To fade away into them.

Was that really so bad?

Himiko leaned forward and took a deep breath before clearing her throat.

“H-hello… Japan. Everyone here… I, um… Thanks for… coming to my sentencing I guess…”

There was a look of panic in her lawyers’ eyes. She sounded unsure. Insincere. This wouldn’t work if it wasn’t from the heart! Shirakawa rested a hand on her chest, desperately trying to signal to Himiko that she needed to change course.

Himiko narrowed her eyes and sighed. She’d apologize to her lawyers later. Right now… She had something that she had to get off her chest. Something from the heart.

“You guys are jerks.” The courtroom gasped at that. Her lawyers crumbled.

“Not the people I’ve hurt. I get why you guys are here. I understand that at least. But everyone else… All you heroes in the prosecution’s audience… Why did you come here,” Himiko’s accusatory tone wasn’t exactly doing wonders to endear the public to her plight. “Just to see me sentenced to death? Was that worth taking time out of your busy schedule of helping people?”

“I hurt people. I did. I’ve already been found guilty of… a lot of crimes,” she mumbled, looking at the judge’s desk and seeing the long list of crimes she’d been convicted of. She’d only been acquitted of a couple, but the long list could easily stand on its own. “I… I’m not sure I’d take it all back if I could. But so have all of you- either directly, or by being awful at your jobs.”

“Dabi-kun killed a ton of people because he couldn’t live in a world where his dad was being praised every day for being the #2 hero- Endeavor- while also being the abusive father he’d known his whole life! Who holds him responsible for beating his wife or neglecting his children?” Himiko remembered all of the stories Dabi had told her about his life at the Todoroki household. She couldn’t believe that such things were taking place in the home of a hero. It sounded horrific.

“Spinner-kun hurt a lot of people because he was tired of people being racist towards him- shouldn’t it be a hero’s job to help people like him? Shouldn’t people like Miruko or Gang Orca be fighting against the same thing?!” Himiko knew what it felt like to be hated, but she couldn’t begin to imagine the type of hate that Heteromorphs got. Why were people like Miruko and Gang Orca so cold towards people like Spinner? Weren’t they all in the same boat?! Couldn’t they relate to why Spinner had felt the desperation for change?!

“Magne got disrespected every day of her life and fired from seventeen different jobs while Tiger gets to be a big, strong, respected hero! If Magne had a little more money- money from the jobs that kept firing her- she would’ve been able to afford all the surgery she needed! Would she have been respected then?!” Himiko had been close with Magne before Overhaul had killed her. She still resented the man for her friend’s murder. The only other woman in the League. They’d done each other’s hair and nails on at least a few of the cold winter nights they’d spent in that warehouse. Himiko could remember how happy Magne had been with the League. The one place she’d ever been respected.

“Tomura-kun- oh, I bet it’d be so easy for you guys to just write him off as a murderer and never think about him again,” Himiko snarled, wishing that she could take on the whole world for her friends. “But Izuku-kun knew better! He knows that Tomura-kun was more than that! His father was a mean, petty man that abused him just as much as Endeavor had Dabi-kun! And when he couldn’t control his Quirk- when he was just a little kid on the street- no one was there for him! No one offered to help a child!”

“Jin-kun…” Himiko’s voice caught in her throat as she mentioned Jin. She wiped some tears from her eyes before feeling fire burning in her throat. “Jin-kun needed help more than anyone. He was a little crazy, sure, but instead of doctors, he got a sword in his back,” Himiko spat, eyes narrowing at Hawks in the crowd.

“Where were you guys! Where were any of you!? Too busy with your sponsorships or recording lines for commercials? Too busy working in rich neighborhoods where you could get more money? Too busy fighting to help?!” She knew she was shouting, but she just couldn’t stop herself.

“Watanabe was using Hanabata as a witness?! Was I supposed to feel bad for killing her sister when she’d been trying to murder me!? Oh, but you guys don’t care about that, poor Kizuki-san, another victim of the evil Toga Himiko. I NEVER WANTED TO FIGHT HER! But where were any of you heroes when I was running for my life and she was using her own followers as bombs to hurt me?! Where were you heroes when I was moments away from having my neck snapped!? NOWHERE! The only person there for me was Jin-kun! And you killed him for it!” Himiko knew that all this resentment had always been bubbling inside of her, but she’d never expected for it all to come out now. She couldn’t stop herself.

“I didn’t care about her! She made me kill her! If you asked me if I’d do it all again, the answer would be yes! And the only thing I’d feel bad about would be using Ochako-chan to do it!” Himiko watched as Watanabe-san flinched, fists clenched tight as she talked about the older woman’s dead sister. Clearly she wasn’t as okay with it as she’d led on.

“Ochako-chan said she doesn’t think she’s a hero? She’s more of a hero than most of the professionals in this room. All you guys know is how to punch other people when they’re having the worst days of their lives. When they’ve already snapped. But where’re the heroes when someone is begging for help? Where’re the heroes to help before someone’s snapped?” Himiko could see exactly how uncomfortable she was making all of the heroes in the crowd. Well… not all. Some heroes seemed to be hanging on her every word. Rock Lock and Lady Nagant and Froppy and… All Might? Wasn’t that weird?

“I saw the footage of the fight. It wasn’t just heroes that saved the day. Not just one but three villains helped Deku when he was in danger of losing. Lady Nagant- she’s a murderer too, isn’t she? She almost killed herself stopping Tomura-kun from destroying your Coffin in the Sky. Great name by the way- you guys already planned on killing him?” Izuku didn’t look away either. Just like his mentor, he seemed to be entranced by what Himiko was saying.

“And Gentle Criminal and La Brava? They both got a second chance. Don’t they all prove that second chances work?! Don’t they prove that Jin-kun didn’t have to die?!” Himiko’s voice finally broke. She was frustrated. Anger. Tired. But more than anything, she missed her friend. He’d deserved better.

Would he think the same?

“... thank you… Thank you Izuku-kun, and Ochako-chan. And Spinner-kun and Mr. Compress, too. I… I’m glad I had the chance to meet you all. I think you’re the only people in the world who actually understand me. But… I don’t think Japan cares enough about me to give me a second chance. I hope you guys remember me…” Himiko pulled away from the microphone and looked around the crowd.

No one seemed happy about her little speech. Her lawyers looked defeated. Most of the heroes on the prosecution’s side had gone from looking a little moved after Ochako’s speech to pissed at having been called ineffective. Spinner and Mr. Compress looked so worried, like they were watching a baby getting ready to stick a fork in an outlet and couldn’t stop it. Izuku and Ochako looked panicked, as if they both already knew what Himiko’s testimony would lead to. The only person who looked even remotely happy was Watanabe, the tiniest smirk on her face.

Oh well.

Judge Nagase took a breath to speak, but he was almost immediately interrupted by All Might. Everyone in the courtroom turned to watch the man as he stood up from his seat. Suddenly this wasn’t Judge Nagase’s courtroom any longer. It was All Might’s.

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!” That laugh sounded odd coming from him in this small, weak, fragile form. It was big and loud and boisterous. But it belonged to All Might all the same.

“Bravo, Toga-san. Not as elegant as it could’ve been discussed, but certainly described far more wisely than I could hope anyone your age would’ve put it. I take full responsibility for the failure of heroes everywhere.” Somehow he seemed even larger than life at the moment. Even without the muscles and the bulk and the imposing stature, he seemed to fill the room on his very aura. His voice seemed to come with a soundtrack of trumpets.

“I’ve entrusted that very goal to the heroes of tomorrow. But thank you for pointing out my failures. I apologize from the bottom of my heart for not being there for you when you needed help the most. For you and all your friends.” All Might walked forward, pushing past the waist-high swinging double-doors and past the defense counsel's table. He was just a couple of steps from the witness stand when he got down on his hands and knees and bowed to Himiko, pressing his forehead against the courtroom floor.

“I made a career of being a hero while proclaiming I am here! Young Toga, this new generation of heroes still has much to learn, but I can promise you one thing. We will be there!”

The whole courtroom was holding its breath. In shock, disbelief, anger… Who knows what else. The whole world had just watched All Might get on his hands and knees and apologize to Toga Himiko! What did that mean?

Higuruma frantically waved at Himiko, snapping her out of her thoughts. All Might was still on his hands and knees. Still waiting for his apology to be acknowledged. Himiko had never felt about All Might the way tons of students at her school had felt. She’d never understood all of the pomp and fanfare. Until now.

“Th- thank you,” she mumbled. Only then did All Might rise to his feet, bow once more, and make his way back to his seat in the audience.

Judge Nagase sighed and sat back in his seat. “I think we’ve heard enough.”

Chapter Text

“We’ve heard from everyone who wished to speak on behalf of Toga Himiko. Two former members of the League of Villains, and two of our greatest heroes… It’s difficult to put into words how frustrating it is to have that sort of polarized defense… It’d be easy to discount Iguchi-jukeisha’s or Sako-jukeisha’s testimony as whining for the defense of a fellow villain. Discounting Midoriya-san’s or Uraraka-san’s testimony is quite honestly, impossible .” The judge sighed, stroking his beard for a few moments as he thought of what to say next.

“We have an age of majority in this country to protect minors from overly severe consequences. We as a society recognize that young people need to have the chance to make mistakes, learn and grow in ways that we expect adults to already understand better… Toga Himiko-jukeisha fought to tear down this very society.” Normally whenever someone had made a big speech like this, Himiko had tuned them out. Drifted into her thoughts. She was entirely indifferent to whatever monologue these people had prepared. But she couldn’t turn her attention away from what Judge Nagase was saying.

“Terrorism… sedition… dozens of murders… These crimes cannot be treated lightly. And they come with mandatory death sentences attached to them. Toga Himiko-jukeisha was seventeen at the time she committed these acts. Surely she had an understanding that her actions were wrong? She was the same age as Deku-san and Uravity-san are today. Surely we can’t use age as an excuse when such upstanding citizens were younger than her when they’d fought against her.” Himiko’s attention turned for just a moment towards her lawyers. They both seemed to be holding their breath. They were both so invested in her sentencing. She’d never even asked them why.

“Toga Himiko-jukeisha has been called many things during this trial,” Judge Nagase continued, reading from one of the papers in front of him. “A psycho. A victim. A killer. A friend. A monster. It’s my job as a judge to see past all of these superlatives and do what’s best for the people of Japan.” He took a deep breath and set down his papers. He looked up at the ceiling, as if asking the gods themselves for help to make his decision. It was… odd to see him look so conflicted.

“In all my years as a judge, I’ve never met anyone less deserving of leniency. I’ve never met anyone so dedicated to chaos and destruction, with such a wanton disregard for the lives of those they’ve hurt.” Ah. Himiko let out a small breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. There it is.

“I believe- and forgive me for saying this, you two, I know you children have done far more than anyone else in the name of defending Japan- I believe that you two are wrong.” Ochako and Izuku looked down at the accusation. Like they’d been reprimanded by the judge. “You’re both young and naive, incredibly blind to the horrors of the world around you. Incredibly blind to the depravity of the woman before us all today. You’ve won the day! Despite your loss, you’ve won. Your jobs are over. Now is the time to show the world what the consequences are to such action. To such selfishness!”

“Toga Himiko-jukeisha, if it were up to me, I’d have you put down like a rabid dog,” Judge Nagase insisted, speaking to Himiko directly. “If it were up to me, I’d show the world what happens to a monster when it lashes out against decent people. I truly do believe that doing so would be as heroic an act an old man like myself could ever achieve. Making sure that you could never harm another soul. Ridding the world of something so vile. I’d expedite your execution date to today. I’d make it public. I’d have it broadcast across the world so the Americans can know that we pursued justice for Star and Stripe’s murder as far as our laws would allow.”

“I’ve sent to prison rapists and murderers and all sorts of villainous scum over my life, Toga Himiko- jukeisha,” he spat the honorific like a swear. Like if it had been up to him he’d create his own honorific to use for her. One far more fitting for someone with her criminal record. “I’ve even condemned one villain to death based on the evidence against her. I think you and you alone are the most dangerous and least deserving person I’ve ever had sit before me.”

“However…” Judge Nagase took another deep breath, looking to the ceiling again as he sorted out his next words. “I’m an old man. Seventy-nine as of this March, with eighty fast approaching… I learned just before this trial began that I’ve developed cancer. Prostate cancer. As far as I understand, it's caught early. However, my wife and children made me promise that this would be my final trial before I retire. They’ve already planned a family vacation to Okinawa.”

“Time moves on. Japan moves on. It’s been months since All For One was defeated, and while there’s an immeasurable amount of damage yet to be repaired since the battle, the world is already beginning to move on. All Might made a… rather moving statement a few minutes ago. It’s our turn now to pass the torch onto a new generation. It’s my turn to leave something behind for those that come after me. I intend to leave behind a new, prosperous Japan, where hopefully monsters like Toga Himiko are a thing of the past. Where the mistakes of the past are no longer repeated.”

“Toga Himiko… However long the rest of your life might be, I hope you think of the people you’ve hurt,” he looked directly at Himiko again, holding her gaze. “I hope you think of the lives you’ve stolen. But most importantly, I hope you think of the heroes who sat here today and begged for your life in front of the entire world. I hope you remember their faces and their words for all your days to come. Heroes Deku and Uravity… They truly did save Japan… Monsters and all.” Judge Nagase sighed one last time before gathering his wits to give his final sentencing.

“Toga Himiko-jukeisha will serve out her time in Tartarus prison. Considering the numerous consecutive life sentences against her, she’ll be spending every day of the rest of her life behind bars without the possibility for parole. She will never again be a free woman. For the rest of her life, she’ll serve as an example to future villains of what happens to such selfish, horrific individuals. And hopefully the world will never have to deal with another Toga Himiko-jukeisha.” Judge Nagase sighed, banged his gavel, and rose to his feet before leaving the courtroom.

Himiko was positive this was some sort of joke. That the judge would return in just a moment to say actually, death penalty! There was no way that she’d just been saved. Not after that trial. Not after that build-up!

Himiko watched as the courtroom around her reacted to the news. Higuruma and Shirakawa hugged, as if they’d just won the hardest case of their lives. They probably had. People towards the back of the audience began to file out, some in a huff, others with a shrug. Camie wiped a few tears from her eyes and walked out being held by her parents, just a few steps behind Soma. Spinner, Mr. Compress and Koku were escorted out of the courtroom with their contingent of heroes towards a different exit where they couldn’t endanger anyone should they try to escape. Both Spinner and Mr. Compress gave Himiko a kind wave as they exited the courtroom, while Koku looked back with the same greasy smile he always had.

More and more people filed out. Hawks and Lady Nagant. Dozens of witnesses and hero after hero after hero. The audience courtroom was almost empty in just a few minutes, with only a few people remaining behind.

Himiko looked back and noticed Arata and Fuku were both staring at her in shock. They couldn’t believe their daughter had been spared the death penalty. They couldn’t believe that even after their testimony that she was judged to continue living. This had to be some kind of sick joke! Himiko turned her head and kept looking forward, refusing to meet their gaze again.

“Come on, Fuku,” Arata mumbled, gently taking his wife’s hand in his own. He wanted to leave. To go home. There was nothing left for either of them in this courtroom.

“Himiko…? Himiko, I-”

“Fuku, please-”

“Himiko! Listen to me! Please!” Fuku was desperate to get her daughter to hear her. To even acknowledge her. “I did the right thing, Himiko. Admit it, right now!”

Himiko kept her eyes focused on the empty judge’s desk. She took a deep breath and did her best to tune out her mother’s incessant-

“I was a great mother to you! I gave you everything you needed! Tell them the truth, Himiko!” Fuku was shouting now, standing up and grabbing the back of the bench in front of her as she called out to her daughter.

“This is all your fault! You’ve got your lawyers fooled, but I know what you are,” Fuku shouted, practically shaking as she demanded her daughter’s attention.

“I hope you rot in Tartarus! I hope they do to you even half of what you’ve done to us! You’ve ruined us! You RUINED THIS FAMILY-”

“Toga-san. Please, let’s go. You’ve put her away. You’ve fixed your mistake,” Watanabe said comfortingly. She escorted the Togas out of the courtroom, leaving behind their only child.

Himiko didn’t turn around until a minute or so after she’d heard the doors close behind them. Only then was she able to take a breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. Surely that would be the last time she’d ever see Fuku and Arata Toga.

Himiko finally turned to look behind herself. Ochako, Izuku were still there. Waiting for her. They were waiting alongside their mentors- Ryukyu and All Might- and their friends Dynamight and Tsu.

“Come on! We’re gonna be late,” Katsuki mumbled, elbowing All Might and resting a hand on Tsu’s shoulder. “Hey, you! Brainiacs! I’ve got a math question for you to solve. How many do we subtract from ten until there’s just three left,” Katsuki asked loudly, getting the attention of Mei, Melissa and that strange blue-haired girl from Seiai that was with them.

“Oh, that’s seven- hey!” Saiko and Melissa both took one of Mei’s hands and followed Katsuki as he escorted All Might and Tsu out of the courtroom. Ryukyu whispered a quick word to Ochako before following behind them, leaving Himiko alone with Izuku and Ochako. Probably for the last time.

“I um… I hope that was okay,” Izuku said, his gaze turning from Ochako to Himiko and back again.

“I know you said you… I know. But I…” Ochako couldn’t even get her words out. Himiko hadn’t asked for them to fight for her. The last time they’d talked, she’d made it clear that she wasn’t happy that they’d revived her. That Himiko had lived and died the way she’d wanted.

“Why did you do that,” Himiko asked, nervously wringing her hands. She understood why they’d spoken on her behalf, but… there was one thing that was bothering her. One thing that twisted her stomach in knots.

“You deserve a second chance, Toga-san. I… I think we both-”

“No, not that,” she mumbled, interrupting Izuku. She already knew that he believed that. That wasn’t what bothered her so much.

“Why did you guys… Why did you lie for me,” Himiko asked, narrowing her eyes at the two heroes. As long as she’d known Ochako and Izuku, she never would’ve expected the two to lie. Especially not so convincingly that even she was unable to tell if they’d lied.

“Lie? About what, Toga-san,” Izuku asked curiously, tilting his head at the question. Himiko knew deep in her heart that Izuku couldn’t lie even if he wanted to. He was just too good. And she was positive the same was true of Ochako.

“About me being a hero. I’m not a hero,” Himiko hissed, tears welling up in her eyes.

“Toga-san. You… you misunderstood. He called you his hero… I called you my hero. Neither of those were lies, Toga-san…” Ochako rested a hand on Himiko’s, rich brown meeting pale gold and truly seeing the woman that that gaze belonged to.

“Guys… It’s time,” Higuruma said softly, nodding towards the courtroom officers that’d gathered behind him to take Himiko off to Tartarus. They were accompanied by Red Riot, Real Steel, and Vlad King- a trio of heroes that perfectly countered Himiko’s specific skill set.

“We’ll visit once you get settled in. We’ll stop by every day so that-”

“Visiting hours are only Mondays at Tartarus,” one of the cops said flatly, handcuffing Himiko to her wheelchair to ensure she couldn’t try to escape.

“Every week then! We’ll be there as often as we can,” Izuku said, raising his voice as Himiko’s guards took her away. Eijirou did his best to walk as slowly as he could, giving Izuku, Ochako and Himiko as much time to speak as possible. It was the manly thing to do.

“You won’t be alone, Toga-san! I promise! We’ll send books! And supplies,” Izuku called out as they neared the far wall of the courtroom.

“I’ll send all the manju cookies you can eat,” Ochako shouted, desperate for Himiko to understand.

They’ll be there for her.

Himiko couldn’t help the small smirk on her lips as she was wheeled out of the courtroom. She almost believed All Might’s words. We will be there.

Better late than never?

Himiko fidgeted with her eyepatch as she was loaded into the police van. It wasn’t until they’d started driving that she realized that Shirakawa and Higuruma were still with her. Was that normally what happened? Did lawyers usually join their clients all the way to the prison they were gonna be locked up in?

There was a second, more pressing question itching at the back of Himiko’s mind. One that she’d had ever since she’d been assigned these two lawyers to her case. She’d expected any lawyer forced to represent her to hate her. To be angry with the fact their legal duties extended to her. Instead, Shirakawa and Higuruma had seemed cordial and had done a great job defending her. They’d gotta at least a few of her crimes thrown out because of a lack of evidence. Not enough to matter, but still… Not to mention everything from the money spent on her haircut to the outfit she was wearing had been paid for by them.

Why had they done all of this?

“Hey… Can I ask you two something,” Himiko asked, fidgeting a bit with her handcuffs

Both of her lawyers turned to watch her, curious as to whatever question Himiko might have. She hadn’t asked much of them since her case had started. It was odd that she’d have a question now, after her sentencing.

“Why did you guys take my case,” she asked, her eyes glancing from Higuruma’s deep black gaze and Shirakawa’s soft purple. For the first time since Himiko had known him, Higuruma chuckled to himself. A smile reached his lips that wasn’t his usual smirk. Shirakawa gently nudged him, trying to get him to be serious.

“I… I guess we should’ve explained this to you when we took your case,” Shirakawa sighed, leaning back in her seat and resting her head against the wall of the van. “I was hoping we could use your case as a… springboard, I suppose. In an attempt to reform the Quirk Counseling system.”

“... I don’t understand,” Himiko asked, looking between both of her lawyers for some clarification. Higuruma sighed and opened his jacket pocket, pulling out a single cigarette. Himiko had always suspected he’d smoked. He didn’t light it, and instead just kept it between his lips as Shirakawa rolled her eyes.

“Well, our plan was to try to link the catalyst for… well, most of the things you’ve done, to your abuse at the hands of your Quirk Counselors. if we could prove some link between Quirk Counseling and your acting out then… I was hoping we could maybe work on reforming the system,” Shirakawa explained, twirling her long purple hair around a finger as she spoke. She seemed so different out of a courtroom.

“... reform?” Again, Himiko wasn’t entirely sure what Shirakawa was talking about. Why would anyone want to reform the Quirk Counseling system? Why would anyone want to? Anyone who’d ever had firsthand experience with the system would almost universally want to avoid it at all turns once they’d graduated from it.

“Yes. I… When I was younger, my Quirk was incredibly powerful and difficult to control. I… got into a lot of trouble. As it manifested, I had terrible urges that led to me hurting a few people… I was sent to Quirk Counseling, where I met Higuruma,” Shirakawa explained, seeming to fidget more and more with her hair as she spoke. Even the heroes in the van seemed interested in what she was saying, with Vlad gently nudging Real Steel as he lost focus on maintaining his Quirk for a moment and his metallic skin changed back to normal.

“... what’s your Quirk,” Himiko asked.

“My Quirk is Body Transformation. I can change the shape of someone’s body… When it manifested, I developed powerful urges to change people… sometimes without using my Quirk,” she explained, feeling more and more uncomfortable as she discussed her early life. Shirakawa nudged Higuruma, desperate to get the attention off of herself.

“My Quirk is Dream Walking. I’d wandered into some politician’s dream and stolen his credit card number when I was 12,” Higuruma said with a shrug.

“So you guys… just wanted to use me to reform the Quirk Counseling system,” Himiko asked, frustration seeping into her voice.

“No, not use your case. We sincerely wanted to help- we’re both against the death penalty on principle. But we also wanted to build a platform with your case to demand a chance to begin looking into Quirk Counseling as a whole. Toga-san, when Higuruma-san began Quirk Counseling, the rate of service was one in 3300. When I started, it was one in 3250. Do you remember the number they gave you when you went?”

“... one in 3000.” Himiko remembered the number like it was her own birthday. The counselors had beaten it into her head, to remind her how abnormal she was. How most people didn’t need this service. How needing it at all made her wrong. It sent a shiver down her spine. Did that mean that even more people were going to Quirk Counseling than they had when she’d started?

“It’s currently one in 2800. That number is growing, Toga-san. My own daughter was recommended for Quirk Counseling at the age of seven- she’s got a similar Quirk to my own. And my son… his Quirk might manifest any day now.” Shirakawa seemed genuinely nervous. It was fair. If she’d had to go to Quirk Counseling and her daughter had had to go to counseling for a similar Quirk, then it was almost guaranteed that her son would be recommended for the service. And if she didn’t take him…

“You brought your daughter in,” Himiko asked, her eyes narrowing at the older woman. She honestly couldn’t believe ever bringing her own child into Quirk Counseling. Even at gunpoint, she’d rather die than bring her own flesh and blood to those people. They were the real monsters.

“Only for one session. I… I couldn’t watch what they’d done to her. I pulled her out twenty minutes into her session and she never went back. And I am not taking my son to those people,” Shirakawa hissed, gritting her teeth in frustration as she banged on the wall of the van. It was clear she cared about this. Clear that she was serious about trying to change the Quirk Counseling system. But there was one thing Himiko couldn’t believe.

“And you guys think you can reform the Quirk Counseling system? To make it better?” It sounded like a joke. There was no reforming those people. There was no amount of training those doctors could participate in that would make them Not Monsters. They were who they were, and they’d never change.

“Yes! Think about it, Toga-san. We could work together. We could advocate for you! We could show the world what goes on behind those walls. And when we do, there’s no way people will think it’s okay! The Quirk Counseling system only exists because most people don’t know how bad it is. Most people never have to interact with it. But you… we could change everything,” Shirakawa explained excitedly. She was passionate about this. She cared. But she was wrong.  

“... you guys are stupid,” Himiko mumbled, rolling her eyes at the older woman. “You think people would care even if they knew? They’d say we deserved it. That I deserve it… You heard what the judge said about me… No one cares about us.”

“Toga-san! That’s not true-”

“We’ll be at Tartarus in three minutes. You guys need to say your goodbyes.” The voice of the officer driving the van was loud and clear over the intercom. They were at Tartarus. It was time.

“Himiko, please-”

“The Quirk Counseling system should be destroyed. Those people should be in Tartarus even more than I should be,” Himiko’s voice was strong and clear in the confined van. “Tomura-kun once promised me that he’d tear down the entire system for me once he gained power. If you guys really cared, you’d do your best to tear it down yourselves.”

“Toga-san. You can’t-”

“Take our card. In case you ever want to speak,” Higuruma said sincerely, handing Himiko his card. Himiko took it, but she couldn’t imagine ever calling these people. They were both wrong. No way she’d ever agree to anything that didn’t result in tearing the Quirk Counseling system to the ground.
At least the number was easy to remember. (054)-054-0544.

“We’re here,” the officer said, pulling the van to a stop. Real Steel grabbed Himiko’s wheelchair and began to push her out of the van. Out into the sunlight. Himiko wished she could shield her good eye from the glaring sun, but she didn’t have the freedom to even do that with her handcuffs. Instead, she was forced to wait until her vision adjusted. The Tartarus campus filled her gaze. The prison had clearly been rebuilt recently. The first building to be rebuilt after the heroes won the war. A place to keep all of those villains they’d captured. A place to return to the status quo. 

It was huge, imposing, bleak…

The officers moved her out of the comfy wheelchair Shirakawa and Higuruma had bought for her, and into one provided by the prison. It was much less comfortable. The wheels were hard to turn, the seat was thin and uncomfortable to sit in, and the frame was hard yet wobbly, digging into her back. She was finally wheeled into the facility, where her guards were changed. She left behind the heroes that had escorted her and they were replaced with stern, indifferent looking prison guards. They stripped her, patted her down, and gave her five minutes to shower in cold water before handing her her new uniform.

Prisoner number 24601.

The uniform was rough and itchy, and felt as if it’d been ironed until it could stand on its own. The very threads seemed to scratch at her skin. She tried her best to get comfortable as wheeled into her cell. Only once she was inside her cell did the guards unlock her handcuffs before slamming the door behind her.

“Dinner’s at five.” Then they were gone.

Himiko looked around her cell. It was barely lit by a window smaller than her head. The overhead lights were dim and buzzed loudly, flickering every few seconds as if they themselves weren’t sure if they should be on. The walls were bleached white. There was a dull, green mat on the floor that stopped a few inches short of the sink and toilet. There was a futon and some sheets. A small desk with two unsharpened pencils. And a bookshelf with no books in it. In total, the room was about 70 square feet.

Himiko sighed and wheeled herself over to the sink. Her skin was still wet, and she was uncomfortable in the uniform she was wearing. She hadn’t been allowed to hold onto the towel. Instead, she did her best to dry herself with a few squares of toilet paper and wring her hair out in the sink. They’d even taken her hair ties. The memory of her fighting to keep her buns earlier today felt silly now. They’d even taken that from her. Even the powder blue eyepatch her lawyers had bought her was missing, and she doubted she’d ever see it again.

Himiko took a few minutes to properly dry herself before wheeling herself to her bed. She took a deep breath and forced herself to stand. Her legs were still shaky, and she doubted she’d be able to walk far at all, but at least she could stand.

She tipped her weight forward and let herself fall onto the futon. The sheets were rough and itchy. She bunched them up and pushed them against the wall, not wanting them against her skin. She rested her head on her pillow. It was thin, hard and cold.

Himiko watched the sky outside her cell for the next few hours. She watched the sky darken from bright blue to a deep, deep black, interrupted only by the odd flash of a searchlight every few minutes. Only when she could see a few stars in the sky did she realize the guards must’ve forgotten her lunch…

This was her cell. This was where she’d live out the rest of her life.

It was less of a home to her than the dank, grimey warehouse she’d lived in with the League. At least back then she’d had her friends.

She missed Dabi. She missed Magne. She missed Tomura. She missed Spinner. She missed Mr. Compress.

She missed Jin…

Himiko sobbed into her pillow until she fell asleep.

Chapter Text

“Wake up, inmate!”

Himiko whined as she was forced from her fitful sleep, and slowly opened her eyes. She was exhausted. She felt like she’d hardly even gotten any sleep at all. She pushed herself into a seated position in her bed and looked out the window. The sun had barely cleared the horizon, and most of the sky was still super dark, with the last few morning stars still twinkling in the weak sunlight. Clearly only a few minutes since sunrise.

Himiko hated waking up early. She’d never been an early riser, and usually had trouble waking up before 10am. If it was sunrise… it likely wasn’t even 7am yet. She tried to go back to sleep- to shut her eyes for just a few minutes, but the buzzing fluorescent lights and metallic clang of metal doors opening and closing made that impossible.

Himiko pushed herself to the edge of her bed, resting her feet on the cold floor for a few moments. She pushed herself to her feet, and while she was a little wobbly, at least she could stand. She kept herself upright for as long as she could. Recovery Girl had warned her that pushing herself wasn’t a good idea, but she had to get her legs back. The seconds ticked by and she got more and more unsteady. After only two minutes, she’d worked up a sweat and was forced back to the bed to sit. Her legs felt like jelly, but they were getting stronger each day. Soon she-

“Inmate! Morning check!” Himiko narrowed her eyes as she watched three prison guards enter her cell. One woman and two men. One of the men- the shorter one- stayed by the door while the other two walked in. Both of these guards had an antagonistic look on their face, as if they were hoping she’d do something wrong. Something worth punishing her over.

“Check the chair,” the woman said, nudging her companion to inspect Himiko’s wheelchair. What could possibly be in a wheelchair they’d given her less than 24 hours ago? Himiko watched as he inspected every inch of it. The seat, the handles, the tires… What were they expecting?

“Chair’s clear,” the man said, pushing it out of his way as he went to inspect the sink and toilet.

“Off the bed, inmate.” The woman walked towards Himiko and she could sense the hostility pouring off of her. As if she were begging Himiko to defy her. Normally Himiko would be happy to test someone like this. But normally she was also armed with her favorite knife…

“I need my wheelchair,” Himiko explained as she pointed at it. It’d rolled a few feet away towards the door. She maybe could’ve reached it a few minutes ago before she’d tried to stand, but now… 

“No, inmate, you need to get off the bed. I’m not asking.” The guard sneered, hands tightening on the handle of her baton. Himiko narrowed her eyes at the taller woman. The order was obvious. Himiko pushed herself off the bed and instantly fell to her knees. She started to crawl on hands and knees towards her wheelchair, but only made it a few steps before her thighs failed her. She crawled the rest of the way on her belly to get to her wheelchair, her teeth chattering as she dragged her body along the cold floor. When she’d finally made it, she realized she had a new problem. She couldn’t really climb into her wheelchair without help.

Himiko looked back over her shoulder, half expecting someone to come to assist her. Instead, the male guard was rifling through her pillowcases and sheets, while the female guard was sitting comfortably on the edge of her bed, as if she were waiting to watch the show. Himiko turned to look at the guard that was standing outside of her cell. None of these guards were offering any help?

“Hey… aren’t we being a little hard on this one,” the guard standing outside asked, looking incredibly uncomfortable but still making no move to help.

“Oh, yeah? You think we’re being a little hard on Toga Himiko,”   the woman asked pointedly, saying Himiko’s name like a slur. The guard outside flinched at the revelation and immediately rolled his eyes at the young woman laying on the floor.

Himiko didn’t have any help here.

Himiko sighed and braced herself for the exertion to come. She reached up and struggled to pull herself into the wheelchair. At first she tried from the front, reaching up and grabbing the arm of the chair in an attempt to lift herself up into the seat. Unfortunately, with the wheels pointing directly at her, any applied weight only brought the chair closer towards herself and pressed the flimsy metal frame into her body. After a few attempts, she tried to turn the chair around so it was facing perpendicular to herself. She tried again from this new angle, but all she managed was to nearly tip the chair over onto herself.

Himiko hissed and grit her teeth. Ever since she’d been healthy enough to leave her hospital bed, she’d had help. Recovery Girl or Mei or Melissa or her lawyers. She hadn’t even realized how grateful she should’ve been to them until now. She just didn’t have the strength to pull herself into the chair…

Himiko pushed the wheelchair against the wall before trying again. Maybe if she could just get some leverage, she could climb in? Maybe if she could put most of her weight against the wall, she could shimmy her way up? She tried to evenly brace her weight between the wall and the chair and struggled as much as she could, her arms shaking as she fought to pull herself up into her wheelchair. The exertion was already getting to her, her muscles burning and sweat beading on her forehead. She tried again, and again, and again, and was quickly running out of breath. Her stomach was growling as well, as the last thing she’d eaten had been Ochako’s manju cookies before she’d been sentenced. That’d felt like a lifetime ago.

Surely the guards had somewhere else to be soon? Surely they’d have to help her eventually if not just to get on with the day?

No… Himiko could tell they were enjoying themselves. She could tell they thought this was exactly what she deserved. They’d wait here and watch her struggle for hours without a care in the world. And if she grew too tired, and couldn’t pull herself into the chair… Well, it wasn’t as if the guards were above threatening violence. She doubted they’d be above acting on it. 

Himiko took a moment to recover before pushing her wheelchair closer to her desk. This time she tried bracing her back against the desk and her left arm against the wall as she pulled herself into her chair with her right. Hand over hand, she managed to slowly pull herself up off the floor. She forced her legs to bear at least some of her weight as they began to straighten out beneath her. She was quickly losing her breath, sweat dripping down her back and her head was spinning as she fought to pull herself into the seat. It took every last ounce of her strength to pull herself into the seat of the wheelchair where she finally curled up and pulled her legs in. She’d made it.

She grit her teeth to keep herself from whining. She didn’t want to give the guards the satisfaction of knowing how much pain she was in. How weak she felt after just getting into her wheelchair. She’d deny them as much as she could for as long as she could.

It took a few more moments before she’d caught her breath and was finally able to sit upright in her chair. Now that she was facing the window, she had to cover her eyes from the blinding sunlight- well, at least cover her left eye. The sun was definitely a lot higher in the sky than it had been when she’d gotten out of bed. How long had it been…

“You’re late for breakfast, inmate. We’ve got your uniform, but if it takes you as long as it took you to get in the chair to put that on, you’re gonna be late for the showers too.” The guard threw a fresh set of clothes at her, and Himiko did her best to get it on quickly. The bra was loose and uncomfortable, but at least it was softer than the uniform shirt. The underwear were thin and itchy, but she didn’t have much of a choice. The socks were still damp from the wash. The uniform itself was gray and starched and ironed so much it was rough against her skin, and she could feel practically every itchy thread that made up the material. It certainly wasn’t Best Jeanist approved. Once she’d finally gotten it on properly, she felt a thin piece of fabric in her pocket. She reached inside and found a black eyepatch. Not the powder blue one she’d been given by her lawyers, but… at least she’d been given one.

“It’s already seven thirty. Might as well get this one to her job training,” the man said before nodding towards the door. Himiko frowned as the guards grabbed her wheelchair and immediately started pushing her out of her cell. She felt gross, clammy and sweaty. She was late for breakfast, late for the showers, and she hadn’t even had the chance to brush her teeth.

Great first day.

Himiko paid close attention to the path they were taking. She committed every turn of the hallway to memory just in case she ever needed the information. Tartarus was a bleak, depressing maze of concrete and metal, filled with the worst kinds of villains. She’d heard horror stories her entire life about how bad this prison was. It was partially why she’d run away the moment she’d realized how badly she’d hurt Saito. Unfortunately, she’d had no idea how much worse Tartarus was than the stories themselves.

Himiko flinched away from the light as she was wheeled out into a large courtyard. It took a few moments for her eye to adjust, and when it finally did, the first thing to catch her attention was the giant electric hum coming from the sky. Her hair seemed to stand on end a bit, and she could tell this must be some kind of technology designed to keep people inside. Or stop people from coming in? Or both.

She was wheeled to a small station with four seats in front of as many computers. No one else was there yet, but she had the feeling she wasn’t exactly meant to wait for them, even if she was unsure of what to do.

“You’re going to be doing translation work. If you want to be able to afford your lunch by 12, you’d better have at least twenty pages typed up. The stack of papers on your left are what you’re translating. Too many errors and it’ll come out of your paycheck.” The guard hit the button on Himiko’s computer, powering it on, and then went to take a seat at one of the tables at the outskirts of the courtyard, giving them a good view of the inmates in the middle.

… translating? She flipped through some of the pages she’d have to work on. It was all in English. She hadn’t sat in on an English class in years. She’d only had about two years of classes before she’d skipped school altogether, and she hadn’t exactly learned much. Or been that good at it…

Her eyes scanned over each letter. There were some she recognized! J s were little fish hooks. “Knife” started with k s even though they started with an n sound. H for Himiko. T for Toga. If she worked hard, she could maybe sound out a word or two. But she didn’t know what those words meant. There was no way she’d be able to do this. Even after a few minutes just trying to read the first page, she still had no idea what kind of paper she was translating!

She wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she looked up from her work and noticed a couple familiar faces being wheeled towards her.

“Mr. Compress!” Himiko’s face lit up as she locked eyes with her friend.

“Call anyone by their pretend -name again and you’re going in solitary,” the guard growled, practically begging Himiko to make the mistake again.

“Apologies, Hasegawa-sama! Toga-chan doesn’t even know my family name! Please, don’t be upset with her, I’m the career criminal, after all.” The guard hissed and rolled his eyes as he wheeled Mr. Comp- Atsuhiro Sako- to the table beside Himiko. Kaina Tsutsumi was wheeled to the table directly across from her so they were facing each other. The fourth desk was left empty. The guard lingered for about a minute longer than he needed to before heading to join Himiko’s guard at the tables.

“I’d hoped you’d get paired with us, Toga-san. There isn’t much work for a disabled criminal to do, but they certainly get creative when assigning work to a criminal they don’t like,” Atsuhiro sighed, booting up his computer and quickly getting to work as Kaina started on her own with barely more than a nod of acknowledgement.

“... why are you here,” Himiko asked confusedly, eyeing Kaina and the dozens of raw, barely healed wounds that trailed along the older woman’s skin. “Didn’t you help kill Tomura-kun?”

“No good deed goes unpunished,” Kaina said with a shrug, not missing a beat as she typed out another sentence onto her computer.

“Toga-san, it’s best if you get to work. You’d be surprised how long twenty-five pages takes to translate,” Atsuhiro explained as the occasional metallic click of the fingers of his left hand typing on the keyboard peppered his words. Himiko’s shoulders fell as she listened to Atsuhiro’s words. Twenty-five?

“I… Can’t read this,” Himiko mumbled, pointing to her stack of papers. “I can’t read English.”

“Oh come on,” Kaina hissed, rolling her eyes in frustration. “Then you need to ask for a different job-”

“Tsutsumi-san! Please, it’s her first day… Please. I don’t want to give the guards an opportunity to look for a less pleasant job for her,” Atsuhiro’s tone was always exactly what he needed it to be to get the response he wanted.

“How do you expect her to type up her share of the work then,” Kaina asked pointedly, her fingers already moving faster over her keyboard.

“Toga-san? Can you type quickly if I dictate,” he asked hopefully, reaching over to grab her stack of papers.

“I… I can try,” Himiko mumbled. She didn’t have much experience typing on a keyboard either. She’d only had a cheap flip-phone when she was younger, and she wasn’t exactly walking into libraries as a fugitive to learn how to type on a computer.

“You only need to focus on your twenty-five pages to afford your lunch. I’ve enough money saved up to afford my own meal today,” he explained, eyeing the first page to see what kind of piece they’d be translating.

“But I don’t want you-”

“It’s a wilderness survival guide! How interesting,” Atsuhiro said, cutting off her protests. “Mushrooms can be used for more than just a meal. Many wild-grown mushrooms may serve medicinal purposes. Toga-san, are you writing this down?”

Himiko felt so uncomfortable using her friend like this. She was certain Atsuhiro would get in trouble with the guards if he didn’t get his work done. Let alone not being able to make enough money to eat lunch… She steeled herself and started typing as quickly as she could. Hopefully if she worked hard, she’d be able to get fifty pages typed up before lunch?

Himiko quickly learned that typing felt… unnatural. She’d had a phone in middle school, but she hadn’t had many friends to text at all. She also hadn’t had much time to work on a computer. She did her best to keep up with Atushiro’s dictation, but nearly an entire minute would pass in between him reading out a sentence and Himiko finishing transcribing it. She’d never memorized a keyboard and had to find each individual character one at a time before typing it in. And doing all this while recently blinded in one eye… And hungry… And uncomfortably sweaty and clammy… Still, Atsuhiro was as patient as could be with her.

The entire time, Kaina was flying through her own work. She managed to finish about one page every other minute, and was too focused on her own work to even bother looking up from her keyboard at the two people in front of her. Himiko tried to think of how long the older woman had been in Tartarus. She was in her late thirties now. The whole Lady Nagant incident had been… over a decade ago? A bit longer? Kaina had spent at least the past eleven years in Tartarus. Maybe longer? And at least she had a chance at parole after her recent heroism.

Was time even real in a place like Tartarus?

“It’s nearly exercise time, Toga-san. I wouldn’t blame you for taking it and stretching your legs, but we should probably use the time to work on the translation,” Atsuhiro explained, looking up from the papers with a worried look on his face.

“Yeah, okay,” Himiko agreed, gently massaging her temples as she spoke. She could feel a headache coming on- whether from the lack of food, or from staring at the computer screen for the past two hours, she wasn’t sure. Still… she had to finish. She couldn’t let Atsuhiro down, and she wasn’t sure if she could go much longer without eating.

“Piece of advice for you, Toga-san.” Kaina’s voice cut through their chatter for a moment, and Himiko quickly turned her pale gold gaze onto Kaina’s purple. “Don’t let them catch you out of your wheelchair until you’re ready to be treated like the other inmates.”

A whistle sounded just as Kaina finished speaking, and two of the guards quickly got up from their seats and walked over to the desks.

“10am. Exercise break,” one explained stiffly.

“If it’s all the same to you, Hasegawa-sama, Toga-chan and I are going to forgo our exercise time and keep working. More time for you to enjoy your poker game, I’m sure,” Atsuhiro said with a big smirk, gesturing over to the table the guards had been sitting at. Himiko hadn’t even noticed the playing cards there, but clearly Atsuhiro had an eye for people trying to hide things.

“Whatever. You know there’s no paid overtime.” The guards wheeled Kaina away, bringing her over to someone wearing a set of nurse’s scrubs. Physical therapy for her injuries? Himiko didn’t have time to wonder about it. She was only twelve pages in, and there were only two hours before lunchtime.

“Be sure to wrap the tourniquet three inches above the wound. A thick, sturdy stick may be used as a windlass to tighten the bandage around the injured limb.” Atsuhiro read slowly- just a few words at a time- timing the clicks of Himiko’s fingers to the cadence of his next few words. It was slow going, and the throbbing pain snaking its way through her head definitely wasn’t helping. Still, she had to power through.

“Have a sip of water,” Atsuhiro offered, handing Himiko a small, turquoise marble.

“... aren’t you thirsty,” Himiko asked, a pang of guilt causing her to pause despite her thirst. It was only her first day here and she was already imposing so much. If Atsuhiro had taken the time to hide away some water, he’d certainly have done it for himself.  

“I had breakfast this morning, Toga-san. Please, don’t worry about me,” Atsuhiro said sincerely, pushing the marble so it rolled across the desk and stopped in front of Himiko. “Just place it in your mouth and I’ll release my Quirk. No need for the guards to be any wiser.”

“Be quick about it. The guards see you using your Quirk, we're all in trouble,” Kaina hissed, taking just enough time away from her typing to glare at Himiko over her computer screen.

Himiko nodded and quickly slipped the tiny marble between her lips. With the quietest snap of his fingers, Atsuhiro released his Quirk and the marble expanded into a mouthful of water. Not a lot, but enough to wet her throat.

“How long have you been here, Compress,” Himiko asked as she typed out another sentence.

“Sako, in front of the guards, Himiko,” Atsuhiro reminded her. “Almost nine months now? Why do you ask?”

“You’re… already really good at this. How did you manage it?”

“Oh… well, it’s not really as terrible as it feels your first few days here. The work isn’t very hard, three square meals a day… You have the option to buy better sheets for yourself as well, I remember those original bedsheets being pretty awful.”

Himiko frowned as she listened to Atsuhiro speak. Again, he wasn’t lying. She doubted he’d ever really lie to her. But he was also carefully selecting his words. He was doing his best to keep her spirits up. Himiko knew he remembered just how upset she’d been upon hearing Ochako’s and Izuku’s explanation on why she’d been revived, and he was probably worried she wasn’t entirely invested in continuing on with her life if she’d be forced to spend the rest of it here. He would’ve been right a few weeks ago. Back when she’d first woken up. Now? … she was honestly terrified of dying, even if she knew she had nothing to live for.

“Are you okay, Toga-san,” Atsuhiro asked worriedly, resting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

“... I’ll be fine,” she sighed, pushing some of her hair out of her face. “Read me the next line.”

Atsuhiro watched his friend for a few moments. He was a liar himself. A master of sleight of hand, and distraction. He knew Himiko wasn’t okay. Unfortunately, they had work to do. And Himiko’s position wouldn’t be made any better by not getting her work done. “Garlic and honeysuckle can be used as antiseptics in place of pharmaceutics.”

They’d typed another three pages in before Kaina returned from her exercise. Himiko winced as she realized she wasn’t even halfway done if she wanted to make sure Atsuhiro ate lunch. But with only an hour and a half left, she wasn’t even sure if she’d finish in time to afford her own lunch. Watching Kaina blitz through her own work only made Himiko feel even worse about her situation. The older woman had typed up as many pages as Himiko and Atsuhiro had struggled through for the entire exercise break in just a couple of minutes.

Each second seemed to take an eternity to tick by, yet each second passed was another second lost to catch up on her work. Himiko was desperate to finish her work. If she could just afford a meal, the next few hours might not be so bad. The only thing on her mind was the taste of those manju cookies. The last thing she’d eaten before them had been a small breakfast provided by her lawyers. If Ochako hadn’t given her those cookies…

“It is especially important to prioritize an iron-rich diet after a significant injury or blood loss. Red meat, liver, nuts and fish are such foods to favor.” Himiko’s stomach growled as Atsuhiro listed the foods. Between the focus on food and injuries and blood she was positive the guards had selected this piece for her to translate just to mess with her. Just to make it more difficult for her to focus…

“Just a few more pages to go, Toga-san,” Atsuhiro said encouragingly. Himiko looked at the page count and then the time. He was lying. There was a half hour left before lunch and she was only twenty pages into her translation. There was no way she’d manage to get Atsuhiro’s portion of the work done, and at this rate she doubted she’d even be able to finish her own work!

“If you type the rest you can finish before lunch and eat your own meal,” Himiko offered. She knew she was only slowing him down. She couldn’t repay him for his kindness- not if she couldn’t even work well enough to afford her own meal with help!

“Nonsense, Toga-chan. You can finish and enjoy a delicious lunch. Please, don’t distract yourself on my account. We’re almost done,” he said encouragingly. Himiko hated relying on someone else like this, but she didn’t have much of a choice. As her eyes went from Atsuhiro’s expressive brown and back towards her computer screen she was positive they’d met Kaina’s dark purple eyes for just a moment. Had she really looked up from her work? Himiko didn’t have time to consider it.

Himiko went back to typing. Her hands felt like they were cramping as she tried her best to pluck out each character. Her stomach was twisting itself in knots. Her ears were ringing and her head was pounding. Her skin still felt clammy and disgusting. She could barely even make out the characters themselves with her good eye. こ,か,そ,さ... they were all blending together. She could feel herself slowing down despite how hard she was pushing herself. She had to have Atsuhiro repeat a sentence or two as she desperately tried to catch up to his dictation. The gentle slap of another sheet of paper hitting the desk was like a metronome ticking each minute away as Kaina finished another page of her own work.

If she could just-

The whistle sounded all too quickly, and made Himiko’s heart sink. The alarm for lunchtime sounded loud and clear throughout their small courtyard. It was twelve pm.

“Lunchtime, inmates!” The guards came to check on their work.

Atsuhiro: 3 pages.

Himiko: 23 pages.

Kaina: 80 pages.

“Shame. Looks like you two aren’t eating lunch today,” Hasegawa said with a shrug.

“Oh, that’s a shame, really. I truly apologize for not getting my work done on time,” Atsuhiro said apologetically, leaning forward into a bow as much as he could in his chair. He was doing his best to look as small and desperate as possible. Even Himiko felt a twinge of pity for the act. “However, I’d like to use some of the money saved in my account to purchase two meals, please.”

“No meals for inmates that don’t do their work. I’ll be taking inmate 656698 to the cafeteria. You two better keep working or else you won’t be able to afford your dinner either.” Himiko watched as Kaina was wheeled out of the courtyard. She felt horrible. Not only would she be going another few hours without eating, she’d distracted Atsuhiro from his own work and cost him his lunch too! Her stomach growled again, and she felt so exhausted she could barely keep sitting straight. This was too much!

“I can’t do this,” she mumbled. Her voice was so low Atsuhiro had barely heard what she’d said, but he understood perfectly what she’d meant.

“Here, have another mouthful of water, Toga-san. Just let me type up your next few pages. Dinner is only a couple hours away, and the guards will most likely let us get snacks during our 2:30 break.” Atsuhiro had already rolled another marble towards her and was already taking her keyboard as he spoke, doing his best to type up her remaining few pages. He had to make sure she could eat at least once today. Her condition would only worsen if she didn’t!

Himiko groaned and bit back a couple of tears as she rested her head in her hands. There was no way she was going to be able to survive like this. No way she’d be able to do this every day for the rest of her life. Maybe she would’ve been better off if she’d just stayed dead? At least things would be easier! She stared at the tiny turquoise marble, asking herself if it was even worth taking. If the small bit of relief was even worth the enduring pain.

“I’m sure Spinner-san would like to see you tomorrow.” Atsuhiro’s eyes didn’t leave the screen for a moment as he typed up his next few sentences. Himiko opened her eyes for a brief moment to look at him. What did he mean by that?

“He’s likely in the cafeteria right now. Probably eating the steamed cod. I’m sure he’ll be excited to see you tomorrow during our lunch hour.” He was trying to give her hope. Trying to remind her that there was always tomorrow. But did that really matter when tomorrow she’d still be in Tartarus? Still be woken up by cruel guards far earlier than she’d care to be, still only have fifteen minutes to shower, still have to struggle just to earn lunch?

Himiko had never once regretted stopping her Sad Man’s Legion. Ochako had made her feel more seen than anyone had ever made her feel in her entire life. Still… some small part of her wished that she’d at least been able to tear Tartarus down to the ground during the fight.

If only…

Himiko hid the marble as Kaina was wheeled back into the courtyard. She had a tray of food with her, laying on her lap. Himiko wondered why on earth Kaina would’ve asked to eat her lunch in the courtyard in front of the computer instead of in the cafeteria. Was this just to get a headstart on writing more? Did it even matter how much they wrote if there wasn’t any paid overtime? How much did meals even cost anyway?

Himiko watched as the woman was wheeled up to her desk. The guard shrugged and walked back towards his poker game. He clearly wasn’t at all invested in any of this, and only agreed to this for the chance to continue his game with the other guards. Kaina set her food on the desk about halfway between herself and Himiko. Himiko couldn’t tear her eyes away from the steamed cod and rice. It looked flavorless and unseasoned, but at least it was food! And it smelled amazing as well.

This wasn’t fair. This wasn’t fair! How cruel could Kaina be? Shouldn’t they be on the same side?! They’d both killed people for what they thought was right! Or did Kaina think she was better than her because she’d been a hero? Himiko grit her teeth, her worst thoughts getting the better of her for just a moment before Kaina cleared her throat.

The older woman looked to Atsuhiro, then to the plate of food, then finally to Himiko. Then she repeated the motion. Barely more than a movement of her eyes. Not at all enough to catch the attention of the guards.

“Understood, Tsutsumi-san. Thank you,” Atsuhiro said gratefully, a small smile on his face as he gathered what Kaina was saying. Himiko looked at them both, confused by the entire exchange until Atsuhiro leaned forward with his right hand and used his Quirk to turn a chunk of food into a tiny marble. He rolled it across the desk to let it join its twin on Himiko’s section.

Himiko looked at Kaina curiously. Was she really… forgoing her own lunch for her? The older woman was already typing up her next set of pages, not bothering to watch them for even a moment. The tiny act of kindness was beneath even a few moments’ recognition.

Himiko placed the small marble in her mouth and savored the taste of the steamed fish. She followed it up with the sip of water Atsuhiro had handed her earlier. Maybe the small break was what she needed? If she could just get through the next twenty-five pages, she could at least repay Atsuhiro back for the lunch she’d taken from him. She just needed a few minutes to take a few deep breaths, brace herself, and power through.

Himiko had powered through the past few years of her life. From the moment she’d run away, she’d been alone. She’d had to steal to survive, often camping out in an abandoned warehouse or quiet rooftop or alleyway during cold nights. She’d survived years of a cruel, uncaring Japan. She could survive today. And at least this time, she wasn’t alone.

63 pages by 5pm! Himiko had had to skip her 2:30pm break, but she was genuinely proud of herself for what she’d managed to accomplish. It’d been hard work, but with food in her stomach and a bit of a push from Atushiro and Kaina, she’d gotten it done. It’d take time, but she knew within a week or two she’d learn where all of the characters were on the keyboard, and would be that much faster at her translation job. She’d be able to pay back Atsuhiro and Kaina for all the help they’d given her!

Tomorrow would be better. She was sure of it.

She waved to Atsuhiro and Kaina both as they were wheeled in opposite directions on the way to their cells. Himiko would eventually learn where their cells were, and maybe they’d even be able to talk during their breaks? The future didn’t feel as bleak as it had just a couple of hours ago. As long as she wasn’t alone, things could only look up.

Himiko cocked her head as the guard pushing her made a left. This… wasn’t the way to her cell. Or the way to the showers. She was certain she’d memorized the exact path on their way out. Was the guard taking her in a different direction for some reason? Himiko did her best to map out this new path, just in case she needed the information. She doubted the guards would be dumb enough to show her more of the facility than she needed to see, but… well, she wasn’t exactly in a position to turn up a chance at escaping either.

Himiko narrowed her eyes as they came upon their destination. The medical ward. Why was she here? For her eye, maybe? No, certainly if it was possible to fix her eye, those genius girls at UA would’ve done it faster than any Tartarus doctor. Physical therapy for her legs, maybe? Possibly.

She was wheeled into a room that immediately gave her the creeps. The guard grunted before closing the door behind himself. A shiver ran down her spine as she looked around the room, but she couldn’t place why. It didn’t exactly feel like a doctor’s office. There was a wide open space in the middle of the room, as well as the usual bed and desk but… It was just so familiar. Himiko looked around the room and felt her heart beating faster as she looked around. Something was wrong. This wasn’t the kind of hospital room she’d stayed at at UA. This was… different. Off.  

A couple of minutes passed before she heard a knock on the door. It opened ever so slowly, but the moment she’d locked eyes with the person opening it, she’d wished she’d never seen them. She wished she’d never woken up on that UA hospital bed. She wished she’d never even been born.

“Oh? Isn’t this a most delicious treat! Himi-chan? Is that you?!”

Himiko’s blood ran ice cold as the man closed the door behind himself. The one good thing about running away from home was that she’d been certain she’d never have to see this man ever again. Now? This must’ve been some kind of joke.

He was tall- about 6’3”- but he’d been so much taller in her memories. He had ghostly pale skin, spiky black hair, and a fanged smile that made him look like a predator. Some of his hair had gone gray at the roots, and his skin had earned itself a few wrinkles in the years since she’d last seen him, but there was no doubt that this was the same man. Doctor Ishida. Her old Quirk Counselor.

“I saw your name on the ledger a few hours ago and had absolutely deluded myself into believing I’d be meeting with a different Toga Himiko today! I couldn’t believe I’d get the chance to see you after so long! How’s my favorite patient doing, hmm?”

Himiko tried to run. She tried to move her feet, but she could barely feel anything besides the pins and needles feeling she got after sitting down for too long. She’d give anything to be able to run. To hide! She’d been face to face with All For One with less fear in her heart than she felt locking eyes with this man.

“Oh, where are my manners! You were so young when we last knew each other, I’m sure you barely remember me. I’m Dr. Ishida! I’m Tartarus’ Quirk Counselor! And I’m here to help our facility get a solid grasp of your Quirk to ensure you won’t be a danger to anyone. I won’t let you slip through my fingers again, Himi-chan.”

“I heard from your parents that you’ve been a naughty girl this week, Himi-chan. What’d that poor baby bird ever do to you,” Dr. Ishida cooed curiously.

“I didn’t hurt it! I didn’t,” Himiko had begged for someone to believe her. She’d been good! And it didn’t even matter- she was still being punished, even though she hadn’t done what they’d accused her of! How was that fair?

“Aw, sweetheart. I believe you, I believe you… Unfortunately, sometimes it’s easier to admit to things, even if we didn’t do them,” the doctor sighed, gently tracing his gloved fingers along the metallic restraints that held Himiko’s tiny wrists in place. The little girl was crying, absolutely inconsolable at not being believed. The restraints felt like a punishment, and she knew full well that being at the Quirk Counseling facility meant another few hours being at the mercy of Dr. Ishida’s curiosity. She’d sworn a dozen times that she hadn’t killed that bird, and it hadn’t meant a thing.

“Good news, I think we have a new lead on your Quirk. A new idea on what makes you such an interesting little nut to crack. Did you like that little birdie, Himi-chan?”

“I… yes,” Himiko answered desperately, trying to turn her head to catch the doctor’s eyes. She hated being confined in this chair. It never led to anything good.

“Did you like that little birdie more and less than you like blood,” Dr. Ishida asked curiously, moving from Himiko’s wrists to her head and securing a few straps to keep the girl’s head in place for the experiment. When she was finally properly secured, he looked to the observation window and locked eyes with Fuku Toga on the other side of the glass. He always asked if the mother had any protests or questions about his methods. He was a professional, after all. The last thing he wanted was to do anything Toga-san thought inappropriate. Fuku bowed low, giving the doctor all of the permission he needed to proceed with the exam.

“I… I don’t know… It was just so cute,” Himiko explained, a few tears welling up in her eyes as she fought to explain herself. Her parents had never even given her a chance. Even when she’d pleaded for them to believe her, they’d called her a liar. A monster. Her mother had been almost smug then entire car ride to the Quirk Counseling Center.

“Did its death make you happy, Himi-chan,” Dr. Ishida asked curiously, walking behind Himiko and gathering the supplies he’d prepared for this session. He was positive that this time they’d find out her Quirk for sure. He had to crack this case. It was a compulsion he just couldn’t break, and the longer he went without solving it, the more tantalizing the solution became.

“No! I… I didn’t want it to die,” Himiko pleaded, tears streaming down her cheeks. How could she explain that when all her parents had seen was a monster? How could she explain that she’d never wanted to kill anyone?

Dr. Ishida wiped Himiko’s tears away with a napkin, humming softly to himself as he watched the young girl struggle in her restraints. He believed her. She had no reason to lie- not in this situation. But that only made the case more interesting for him.

“I’ve got a little chick here, Himi-chan. Her name is Sally! She just hatched two weeks ago! Isn’t she fluffy? Do you want to say hi to her?” Dr. Ishida showed the tiny yellow chick off to Himiko, and the little bird peeped as it was carried through the air.

“... Sally,” Himiko repeated, watching the curious little bird. She looked so adorable, all covered in her yellow downy fuzz. She was really fluffy.

“Yeah! Now, Sally’s gonna go into this glass box right here,” the doctor explained, humming to himself as he lifted the lid and gently placed the tiny bird in the glass box that’d been set up in front of Himiko. The box was a perfect cube, with sides about two feet wide. There were two metal sheets on either side of the box, but beside that there was nothing particularly interesting about it. “Isn’t Sally cute?”

“Mhmm…”

“Are you feeling alright, Himi-chan,” Dr. Ishida asked, resting a hand on Himiko’s shoulder. The contact made the young girl shudder, but she couldn’t even move away from the Doctor despite how uncomfortable she made her.

“Yes,” Himiko answered reluctantly.

“Good. Do you want to feed Sally some treats when you’re done with your testing today,” r. Ishida asked curiously.

“... yes.”

“Great! We can start now!” Dr. Ishida pressed a button on the table the box was set on, and Himiko watched as the two metal sheets began to slowly move towards each other.

“Wha- what’s happening,” Himiko asked confusedly. What kind of test was this? Why why was there a cute little chick-

“Oh! Well, Sally’s in danger, Himi-chan! If you don’t help her, she’ll be crushed to death. Won’t that be awful?”

“Wait! Wait, please! Don’t hurt her,” Himiko shouted, struggling against her restraints.

“I’m not hurting her, Himi-chan. You are. You could save her, can’t you? Maybe you could speak to her and tell her how to escape? Or maybe you could stop the walls from closing in on her telekinetically? Or maybe you could control the little bird and make her open the door? I’m sure you’ll think of something, won’t you, Himi-chan?”

“Please! No! Don’t hurt her!” Himiko begged and pleaded with the doctor, but she knew all too well he wasn’t going to help her or Sally. Himiko struggled even more against her restraints, desperately trying to free herself to save the poor little bird.

She watched as centimeter by centimeter, the walls began to close in on the little chick. Sally had wandered over to the left side of the box, and was pecking at the floor. She didn’t have a clue of her impending fate. She didn’t have a clue that Himiko was the only person in the world who could save her. Sally finally picked her head up as she was bumped by the wall. There was still about a foot of space between both walls, but it was shrinking by the second. The little chick walked from the left side of the box to the right and only paused for a moment as Himiko pleaded for the little chick’s life.

“I’ll be good! PLEASE! Please don’t hurt her,” Himiko begged, her face red as tears and snot dripped from her eyes and nose. “I’ll do anything-”

“But you won’t save her yourself, will you, Himi-chan? You won’t use your Quirk for her? Come on sweetie, a Transformation Quirk could get you out of these restraints. An Emitter Quirk could free Sally! I know you have it in you.” Dr. Ishida’s tone was candy-sweet and sickeningly upsetting. He scribbled on his little notepad as he watched Himiko beg and plead and struggle. The young girl had dug the metal restraints into her wrists, drawing blood as she fought against them. Her desperation was obvious, but her Quirk still hadn’t revealed itself to him. He had to know what the young girl was hiding. He had to know what kind of stubborn Quirk could lead to such antisocial behavior!

“Sally!” Himiko screamed the little chick’s name as the walls pressed against the bird’s sides. The little bird pecked at the metal sheets, trying to get the machine to let it go, but the cold steel was unyielding. Sally began to panic as the walls pressed up against her little body, her tiny claws scratching at the metal, her wings flapping desperately in her attempt to escape the mounting pressure.

“I PROMISE! PLEASE!” Himiko already knew begging was useless. She’d begged every day for months for the testing to stop. For a reprieve from the constant doctor’s visits. Yet twice a week, like clockwork, she was back under the ever watchful eye of the good doctor. Himiko couldn’t look away as the tiny bird peeped again. The walls were barely an inch apart. Himiko could hear as its tiny bones snapped under the pressure. She’d already screamed herself hoarse, and she could barely rasp out a desperate apology as the walls slammed shut around Sally, the two week old chick. The last she saw of the poor bird was a few drops of blood splatter on the side of the glass wall.

Himiko hung her head in defeat. Salty tears ran down her cheeks. She’d tried so desperately to save Sally. The poor chick hadn’t done anything to anyone! It wasn’t fair!

Dr. Ishida was frustrated for different reasons. He’d been certain that this test would yield results. Still… there was merit in repetition.

“It’s okay, Himi-chan. There’s always second chances! One must be patient when it comes to the youth! Here’s another friend for you. His name is Raymond!”

“Truly, how could anyone have suspected a Hybrid Quirk like yours?” Dr. Ishida’s voice snapped Himiko out of her traumatic memories.

“Transformation and Emitter? That Quirk Singularity Theory seems to rear its head more often than it ever had before,” Dr. Ishida sighed, tucking a lock of Himiko’s hair behind her ear. “If only I’d suspected earlier… I might’ve saved you. I might’ve been able to warn your parents that they’d birthed such a strange little girl. Would you have cared, Himi-chan? Would you have even wanted a better life? Or were you always destined to be an inmate here?”

Himiko didn’t answer. She knew better. Speaking to this man… answering his questions… Never went well for her.

“I get you all to myself now, don’t I? And now no ethics board will be upset with me if I use more… intrusive methods to crack this nut. No, no. I get to fix my mistake. I get to make sure something like you never happens again, don’t I?”

Himiko closed her eyes. It was the only thing she could do. The only way to escape this place. The only way she’d get through the next hour.

Chapter Text

“Toga-san!” Spinner wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly the moment he noticed she was being pushed into the cafeteria. He’d genuinely been more worried during her trial than he’d been during his own, and because of his status as a prisoner, he hadn’t been allowed to even talk to her to check in and see if she was doing okay. At least now they could speak freely… Mostly. Thankfully it took less than a minute for the guards to get tired of personally escorting Atsuhiro and Himiko and take their positions with the rest of the guards in the cafeteria. They weren’t exactly ecstatic to spend so much time among the prisoners to begin with, even if it was for the health of any of them.

“It’s okay, Spinner,” Himiko said quietly, gently ruffling his hair until he pulled away. She was genuinely happy to see him, if not a little reserved after… “I’m okay.” She did her best to smile, but it’d been obvious to everyone she’d talked to today- even Kaina- that something had happened since they’d last seen her. Atsuhiro had tried to ask her if everything was alright, but Himiko hadn’t responded and had instead doubled down on finishing her work as quickly as she could. Spinner looked at Atsuhiro worriedly, but only received a small shake of his head in response. Whatever had happened, Himiko wasn’t going to talk about it.

“What’s for lunch today,” Himiko asked curiously, trying to move the conversation along as she wheeled herself into the line. The last thing she wanted was her friends worrying about her. She’d already imposed on them enough and it was only her second day at Tartarus. She had another… long, long time to go.

“Chicken katsu. I’m pretty sure Tobita-san’s cooking, so it’s bound to be pretty tasty,” Spinner explained, grabbing a tray for her as he spoke. He hadn’t been here as long as Atsuhiro had, but he’d already learned how to take joy in the small pleasantries Tartarus had to offer. It was the only way to stop oneself from going crazy in the monotony of it all.

“... Gentle Criminal,” Himiko asked confusedly as she turned her gold gaze back to Spinner. She was positive she’d seen the man at her trial- oddly enough, on her side of the courtroom. But she wasn’t sure why he’d be at Tartarus of all places. He hadn’t even been in Tartarus after his initial arrest! And he’d helped the heroes during the war. He’d stopped an entire jailbreaking and hundreds of inmates that’d been locked up in Mizuku prison with him. He’d caught UA’s Coffin in the Sky and prevented it from hitting the ocean and freeing Tomura! As far as she knew, he’d never even taken a life, and the worst he’d ever done was embarrass some heroes that’d tried their hardest to capture him. Hadn’t his heroism earned him his freedom?

“Just Tobita-san here, Toga-san. No villain names, remember,” Atsuhiro said, gently patting Himiko on the shoulder to remind her of the rule. He knew the guards wouldn’t be so kind if they heard her using their villain names.

“No villain names. No Quirks. No escape attempts,” Spinner hissed, placing a bowl of food on each of his friend’s plates before serving himself.

“After the war Tartarus started looking to America and implementing some of their prison policies in an attempt to ensure a jailbreaking never happens again,” Atsuhiro explained, gratefully taking the tray Spinner had prepared for him. “Apparently those are the most important rules they have in their prisons.”

“Also explains why the guards are so aggressive. Less heroes. More corrections officers. Half of these guys don’t even speak Japanese.” Spinner pushed his friends along the line, keeping them at a steady pace to get their food. Himiko was going to ask a question when she realized her friend had stood up straighter, eyes narrowed as if he were ready to fight.

“Why the hell is he coming over here,” he hissed, taking a step forward to put himself between his friends and the approaching threat. Himiko searched the crowd to see who it was he was talking about. She felt so naked without a knife by her side. She locked eyes with a familiar face almost immediately. Mustard?

“Well if it isn’t Toga-san! Looks like the gang’s finally all made it to Tartarus!” He spoke like they were friends. Like they knew each other. Truth be told, he’d been captured so quickly, Himiko had barely even gotten the chance to learn his actual name. “Well, everyone who’s still alive.”

“... who are you again?” Himiko kept her voice flat and monotone. She knew Mustard was trying to get under her skin almost immediately. She doubted she’d be rewarded for taking the bait.

“Haha! Oh so very funny! I guess I can’t blame you for not recognizing me, that hideous eyepatch must really get in the way,” he said smugly. “Well you’re gonna get to know me a lot better now that you’re finally in here with the rest of us. I’m sure Moonfish wouldn’t mind seeing you again either.” The boy sneered at her, trying his best to intimidate her with the not-so-implied threat.

“Get back to Imasuji-san before I send you back to him in a box,” Spinner hissed, taking a step towards the other villain. He wasn’t at all intimidated by the high-schooler, and he was positive he wouldn’t need any of his new Quirks to put the boy in his place. Mustard was about as intimidating as the average high-schooler with his Quirk. That’s to say: not at all.

“Whoa, whoa! Relax, big guy! We’re all on the same team, aren’t we? Or, we should’ve been, at least,” Mustard said with a sarcastic grin. Still, he took a step back, and then another, his eyes locked on Himiko before making his way back to the other side of the cafeteria.

“He’s been doubly annoying ever since he started hanging out with Imasuji-san’s crowd,” Spinner sighed, returning to his position behind Himiko and Atsuhiro and pushing them along the rest of the line.

“Apparently he’s under the assumption we abandoned him during the Training Camp Raid. As if it were our fault he got captured by a couple of amateur students,” Atushiro sighed, collecting his drink before allowing Spinner to direct them towards a table. “Impudent little brat, that one. No surprise he was captured during our first real attack on UA.”

“Mus… Imasuji’s here too? And Haken,” Himiko asked curiously. After what’d happened to Twice, she’d kind of just assumed heroes didn’t mind killing the villains they deemed out of control or dangerous. Muscular easily fit that description- he’d already made a name for himself jailbreaking thousands of other villains just a few months ago during the war. Moonfish definitely fit that description, but for… different reasons.

“Indeed. Imasuji-san’s as violent as always. The only reason he hasn’t gone out of his way to attack either of us yet is his own recognition of mutually assured destruction. Spinner’s a formidable opponent these days, and Imasuji-san’s unsure if he’d win that fight,” Atsuhiro explained. He lifted his tray as he was wheeled up to the table and began to eat his chicken katsu. Himiko doubted that was the entirety of the explanation. Muscular was never above a fight, even if he thought he’d lose. Backing down just because he was unsure if he could beat Spinner in a fight? That sounded… off.

“Haken-san is locked in the basement level with the other… unwell prisoners. No one’s really seen him, but every couple of weeks there’s some disturbance that comes from down there,” Spinner explained. “He’s not sane enough to care about the consequences using his Quirk.”

“What happens if someone gets caught using their Quirk,” Himiko asked, taking a bite of her own food. She doubted the explanation would be good but she at least needed to know the stakes. Just in case. She’d be in Tartarus for a long time, after all.

“Solitary confinement. One month minimum,” Spinner responded with a gruff tone. “You don’t want to end up in solitary. The guards tend to forget proper feeding times. You can’t work so they drain your account paying for your food, and you usually leave solitary in debt you need to pay back before you can get regular meals again. Plus… the American guards feel a little too at home with solitary prisoners.” Spinner left that part of his explanation as vague as possible. He didn’t need to explain any further. Himiko could let her imagination fill in the blanks.

“So they won’t attack us on their own,” Himiko pressed, looking into the crowd at where Mustard had disappeared. She hadn’t seen Muscular at all since she’d arrived- he wasn’t exactly easy to miss either- and she decided that was for the best… for now.

“For now. But it’s not as if Imasuji-san’s well well known for his impulse control. And with Sando-san antagonizing us, it’s only a matter of time before something snaps,” Atsuhiro sighed. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. For now, we just need to focus on our translations. Himiko, I purchased a keyboard at the commissary yesterday so you can practice typing while in your cell! It should be delivered to your cell before our shift is over.”

“Oh, they have her doing translations? That’s perfect! They’ve had us mixing concrete and making bricks and it’s frustrating work,” Spinner said with a huff.

Tartarus wasn’t perfect. People who wanted to start fights for no reason. The constant threat of solitary confinement hanging over her head. Tedious working conditions and long hours. But at least she had friends. A lifetime in Tartarus- at the very least- wouldn’t be lonely.

The days seemed to all blend together fairly quickly, with the only variation between them being whatever Himiko was translating for her job, and whatever meals were on a given day. Wake-up at 6:45am. 15 minute shower. Breakfast. Work from 8am to 10am. Skip exercise to focus on translation work. Work from 10am to 12pm. Lunch. Work from 1pm to 2:30pm. Skip break to focus on translation work. Work from 2:30pm to 4:40pm. Dinner at 5pm. Free time from 6pm to 9pm. Locked in your cell at 9pm sharp to do it all over again the next day. It was monotonous and depressing, but at least she had Atsuhiro and Spinner to keep her company and make the days less unbearable.

She’d arrived at Tartarus on a Tuesday. She was somewhat certain Dr. Ishida had said something about weekly sessions, so she had no reason to look forward to the days passing by. That was… until Monday.

Himiko, Atsuhiro and Spinner were in Atsuhiro’s fairly comforting cell after their work day. His cell was furnished with a small computer, an entire bookshelf full of books, and fairly comfortable bed sheets. The small comforts of his room gave Himiko some hope that maybe spending the rest of her life in Tartarus wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.

“You’re learning that keyboard pretty quickly, Toga-san! It won’t be long now before you’re typing without even looking at the keys,” Atsuhiro said encouragingly, watching as Himiko typed out a small passage from a book she’d been working on. It’d been less than a week and she was already improving.

“Yeah, but… I’m only a burden to you unless I can read English on my own,” Himiko mumbled, still feeling pretty frustrated as she readjusted her eyepatch on her face. Atsuhiro had at least managed to find a way to split his own work and still help Himiko, but it was obvious that he’d be able to get so much more done if he hadn’t been spending so much time helping her. He’d be able to afford so many more amenities in his cell if he’d just give up helping her. He’d be able to actually rest during his breaks instead of using the time to catch up on his own work. It wasn’t fair to him, and it made Himiko feel gross. She wasn’t above doing what she needed to get what she needed from people, but usually those people weren’t her friends.

“Dear, there’s no need to concern yourself about such trivialities. When you’re ready I’ll give you my dictionaries so you can start learning. I’m sure you’re already familiar with the English alphabet. Their words are-”

“Inmate 24601! You have visitors.” A guard had appeared outside of Atsuhiro’s cell, arms crossed as if he’d rather be doing anything else than this.

“... visitors?” Himiko didn’t believe him. This felt like a set-up to some sort of trap. Who would want to visit her?

“Let me get you back in your chair,” Spinner offered, standing up from his own seat and helping Himiko off the bed and into her chair. The feeling in her legs was returning, but they still had to pretend she couldn’t walk or else the guards were likely to throw her into physical labor before she was ready.

“We’ll see you in the morning, Toga-san,” Atsuhiro called out as she was wheeled away by the guards.

Himiko made sure to pay attention to the path they were taking as she was wheeled towards the visitor’s wing. She imagined that whatever visitor wing existed would be closer to the edge of the Tartarus campus, so civilians wouldn’t have to travel too far into the facility. It’d likely be well protected, to shield innocent civilians in case of a jailbreak. It was also likely to have the fewest guards, as only the best behaved inmates were likely to even be allowed to meet with visitors in the first place. If there were ever a chance to escape…

She made sure to keep her expression neutral even as all of those thoughts swirled through her mind. She didn’t need the guards getting suspicious of her. Still, she’d never been through this section of Tartarus, and by the look of it, it wasn’t frequently used.

“Things are looking better every day out there. I know you said you wanted to give it time, but it’s been almost a year. The food here can’t be that good,” a man said with a playful chuckle. Himiko narrowed her eyes as she realized who was talking. Keigo Takami- Hawks- was sitting with his feet up on the table as he spoke with Kaina Tsutsumi. The older woman turned to lock eyes with Himiko for a moment before turning back to Keigo.

“There’s something else I need to do before I can leave,” she said vaguely as she smacked Keigo’s feet off the table. They seemed close, but Himiko couldn’t imagine how. Hawks wasn’t much older than herself- he’d made waves by being the youngest hero to make the #2 spot on the leaderboard, after all. Meanwhile Lady Nagant’s scandal had happened long ago- so long Himiko wasn’t sure if she’d even been born when it’d happened. She’d just kind of grown up in a time where Lady Nagant’s betrayal was the hot thing to talk about. How could these two ex heroes possibly know each other?

Himiko pushed the thoughts from her head as she was pushed beyond Kaina and Keigo. She had not just one, but two visitors! Pale gold met warm, rich brown and deep, vibrant green. Her heart started racing as she realized who’d come to see her. She honestly hadn’t even believed them.

“Hi, Toga-san.” Izuku’s soft smile lit up his face as he called out to her before the prison guard had even wheeled her to the table properly. Somehow even the depressive bleakness of Tartarus hadn’t dulled his cheerful spirit.

“... what… What are you two doing here,” Himiko asked confusedly as she looked at the two heroes. She’d honestly thought they’d forgotten about her. Abandoned her. Found literally anything better to do than worry about the supervillain criminal murderer they’d helped put away. But they hadn’t kept their promise! They hadn’t sent a single letter. They hadn’t visited. They hadn’t gotten her out of here! They hadn’t-

“We came to visit. We promised we’d be over every week, remember,” Izuku explained. He wasn’t sure how to read Himiko’s expression. Was she upset that they’d come to visit her? Was she frustrated? Or was she having trouble adjusting to life in Tartarus?

It hadn’t even been a full week yet. The realization hit Himiko like a bag of bricks.

“We haven’t received any letters back from you… We each sent one every day. A couple packages too. Did you like the cookies? I made them myself,” Ochako asked, her warm, brown eyes glancing over Himiko to see if she was okay. Himiko opened her mouth to speak, but she could hardly even believe what she was hearing from the heroine.

Himiko looked from brown to green and back again, an ache in her heart growing that she hadn’t even known had been there in the first place. She missed Ochako and Izuku. And she’d honestly believed they’d forgotten about her.

“I… thought you guys stopped caring,” she said sincerely, looking down at her lap as she fought back a couple tears. She hated looking so weak in front of these two. They’d gone through so much trouble to help her. They’d gone through even more trouble to visit her today. And how could she even begin to repay them for their kindness?

“Wh- what? No! We- we sent manju cookies,” Ochako stuttered, desperate for Himiko to understand. Himiko met Ochako’s gaze again, and she could see the younger woman had dark circles behind her eyes. She still looked tired. Like she wasn’t getting very much sleep. Himiko couldn’t be sure why. Ochako had never looked like that the few times they’d met before the war. What’d been keeping her up so late into the night these days?

“W-we sent books! And letters! D- didn’t you-”

“There’s a delay on the letters you send. It’s to prevent inmates from coordinating with people on the outside,” Kaina explained, her voice carrying across the room to the table they were sitting at.

“Five days. Packages take a week. I can talk to the warden for you and get correspondence between the three of you expedited. Just don’t send anything dangerous,” Keigo explained, holding a toothpick between his lips as he spoke. Himiko felt her skin itch as Hawks offered to help her. She’d been so close to gutting him during the final battle. For Jin! Now he was trying to help her?

“Oh… well, then the first letters we sent should be getting to you tonight? Maybe you’ll see them later,” Izuku said hopefully. His smile didn’t falter for even a moment. How he could be so optimistic, Himiko couldn’t be sure. It was just something else that made him so attractive to her. She had to shake those thoughts out of her head. He’d already turned her down. There was no way he’d offer to date a Tartarus inmate. Plus… Ochako was likely days away from winning his heart if she hadn’t already. There was no way Izuku hadn’t understood what Ochako had said during her speech at Himiko’s trial. She’d basically confessed to him in front of the entire world! She’d won fair and square.

“... yeah… maybe…” Himiko took a deep breath, calming her nerves as she did so. Whatever she’d thought of them before, Ochako and Izuku were here now. It hadn’t even been a week since they’d last seen her. For Himiko… it’d felt like months. A few moments passed before Himiko could swallow her emotions and think of something to say. Now that Ochako and Izuku were here she just wanted to hear about anything that was happening outside of Tartarus’ bleak campus.

“What’s… what’s life like out there for you? Are you… How are your classes going? You guys should almost be done with your second year, right?” If there was one thing Himiko missed while being on the run her entire life, it was school itself. Not necessarily the students or the teachers- she didn’t care much for them- but the smell of chalk and erasers and old books was… comforting. Remembering everyone’s excitement during spirit week also made her heart ache, and she even missed those brisk spring and summer days her school had set aside for marathons and sports tournaments. It was part of why her villain “costume” had always just been her old school uniform. To remind herself of what she hadn’t been able to have because she’d been deemed too different to have a normal life.

“Oh! Um… all the hero schools agreed to taking a year break while we help rebuild. UA, Shiketsu, Ketsubutsu… classes won’t start up officially until April,” Izuku explained, nervously rubbing the back of his neck as he spoke. “So technically we’re still first years.”

“... that… doesn’t seem fair,” Himiko said confusedly.

“Oh, it’s not that bad. It gives us time to catch our breath after the war, and we can help the prospective students get ready for their first year too! I don’t think anyone minds graduating late as long as it means we can help people who need it.”

That made Himiko frustrated. Almost angry. Did Izuku and the rest of his friends really not care about their own lives? Was being a hero so necessarily sacrificial? Did they constantly have to lay down at the feet of society and beg for more? What was their breaking point? Did they even have one? Is that what made them heroes? The masochistic desperation for less from the people who owed them everything?

“What about you, Toga-san? I hope Tartarus hasn’t been too harsh.” That was Ochako, her voice soft and sweet like warm honey. Unfortunately the question felt like ice water on a cold day.

Himiko had never been the kind of person to just respond with a fake I’m fine when asked if she was okay- especially if she wasn’t okay. But what would telling the truth even accomplish here? She was lucky enough to even be alive. Judge What’s-his-face had wanted to execute her right after the trial. She could still remember his words like scars on her heart. And Ochako and Izuku were already sacrificing so much in order to rebuild the country that she’d helped to break. They’d both nearly sacrificed their lives…

“I… I’m fine,” Himiko said with a small shrug. What did it matter that she could hardly afford her meals every day? What did it matter that the guards dictated everything from the time she ate and showered to the food she ate? What did it matter that she had a meeting with Dr. Ishida tomorrow, and that thought alone was enough to nearly send her spiraling into a panic attack? She should be grateful she was alive! Grateful to Ochako and Izuku and those three genius girls for bringing her back.

She should be grateful.

So why did she feel so awful?

“Are you sure? We can help make you more comfortable here! We can-”

“I said I’m fine, Ochako-chan,” Himiko said flatly. Her golden eyes held Ochako’s brown, practically daring the younger woman to push any further. She didn’t want to talk about Tartarus. She didn’t want to talk about her life. She didn’t really have one anymore. She just wanted to hear about Izuku and Ochako. They were the ones actually doing anything.

“W-Well, if there’s anything else you’d like us to send, just send us a letter and we’ll get right on it,” Izuku replied, desperate to do anything to help.

“... thanks,” Himiko sighed, resting her chin in her arms. She felt so… odd. She was here talking with some of the people she loved most in the whole world. Ochako and Izuku… they were both in Tartarus for her! But as exciting as that was, all she could think of was how temporary this was. And how permanent a life sentence was. Is this all she had to look forward to for the rest of her life? Nine hours a day of work, just to be capped off with meeting friends once a week?

It was likely more than she deserved.

“... Toga-san?”

Himiko’s eyes glanced up to meet Ochako’s again. They were wavering, as was her voice.

“Yeah,” Himiko answered, her head cocked to the side in curiosity. She wasn’t crazy about seeing Ochako on the verge of tears like this, but she wasn’t even sure why the younger woman was so close to crying anyway.

“Do… do you still wish that we hadn’t… That I hadn’t…” She could hardly even get the words out. How could she ask this? What if the answer was what she’d been fearing most. What if she’d heard the answer that was the reason behind the tired dark circles behind her eyes?

“... I don’t want to die again, Ochako-chan…”

The guards wheeled Himiko to her cell at the end of their two hour visiting period. Normally visitors could only come see an inmate once a month, and Himiko was in a special class of inmates that technically couldn’t be allowed to see anyone outside of a once per month religious visit. Izuku and Ochako were able to bend the rules as much as they could only because they were the heroes that saved Japan, and thanks to Hawks they were going to bend the rules even more to get their letters to her a bit faster. Even with all the rule-bending in the world though, she was still just an inmate in Tartarus.

Himiko didn’t have it in her to plot the course back to her cell. Her head was too full of sad and frustrating thoughts. Too busy counting down the minutes before she’d get the chance to see Ochako and Izuku again for their next two hour conversation. Too busy thinking about what those young heroes might get up to on their own now that the League of Villains had been disbanded and they weren’t being thrust into life or death situations every month anymore.

Her eyes narrowed as she realized there were a couple of guards stationed outside of her cell, and she could distinctly hear the sound of someone rummaging around. The guards did checks every morning, but this kind of surprise check seemed off. Targeted. Even more confusing, the guards all seemed to be snacking loudly on something.

“Inmate’s back, guys,” one of the guards said gruffly, wiping her face of a few crumbs as she called out the guards currently in her cell. Two more guards left her cell, wiping crumbs off their own faces before walking away with the rest of their group. Himiko looked into her cell and could see it’d been left a mess. They hadn’t taken a moment to put things back in order. Everything was out of place, except for two boxes on her desk that hadn’t been there this morning. She looked over her shoulder as she was wheeled into her cell, hoping- however foolishly- that the guards pushing her would at least try to help her clean the cell. There was no way she’d be able to easily navigate the mess the other guards had left behind without help!

The guards wheeling her locked the door to her cell and joined their peers without even meeting her gaze.

Oh well.

It took Himiko a few minutes to fix the room well enough for her to even make her way to her desk. The few clothes she had were strewn around the place, her bedsheets were on the floor, and the one book she’d managed to buy was lying facedown on the floor. It was hard picking things up from her wheelchair, but she managed. She put everything back in its place before she made her way to the desk to see what had been left for her.

She inspected the boxes closely. One was addressed from Atsuhiro and had a big TARTARUS SUPPLIES logo stamped on it. It was the computer keyboard he’d said he’d bought her! She had nothing to plug it into, and computers were likely incredibly expensive, but at least she could practice typing.

The second box had been forcibly opened, and carelessly resealed. Himiko frowned as she opened it, letting its contents spill out onto her desk. First came two letters- one from Ochako, and the other from Izuku. Himiko excitedly tore open the resealed envelopes, excited to see what they’d wanted to tell her. Maybe things could be a little more bearable if she at least had some correspondence with Ochako and Izuku! Her heart sank as she looked over the letters. Most of the pages had been highlighted with a black marker, blocking out almost everything except for a few odd sentences that made no sense out of context. A red pen had scribbled a note on the backs of them.

Redacted on behalf of Tartarus Corrections.

Even her letters were scrutinized by the officers at Tartarus.

The second pile was a box of manju cookies, torn open and left empty with nothing but a few familiar looking crumbs at the bottom of the box.

Himiko chewed her lip, forcing herself to choke back her tears. She knew she’d failed at that when she realized the letters she was holding were collecting wet spots. It wasn’t fair! She was already here trying to repay her debt to society! Did Tartarus as an institution gain ANYTHING from making her life a living hell?

She hated Tartarus.

Chapter Text

“I’ve poured over all of the recordings and notes I’d taken of our previous sessions. I’ve read every document the government has ever collected on you and your Quirk. I’ve even looked over your grade school essays just in case there was anything important there. Not a single person ever suspected such a unique and dangerous Quirk from you.” Dr. Ishida flipped through a few papers as he rambled to himself. Himiko hissed, wishing she had a knife or scalpel or anything to protect herself from the doctor with. She felt like a cornered cat, knowing she was minutes away from whatever tests he had planned for the day.

“A shame, really. Your Quirk could be incredibly useful… You could’ve been a hero. Or a doctor, even. And instead we’ve allowed you to waste away… What a pity,” Dr. Ishida clicked his tongue as he scanned over the sheaf of papers one last time before setting them down and looking over Himiko. His gaze was even more uncomfortable than the casually cheerful tone he took during his work. It made the hair on the back of Himiko’s neck stand on end.

Himiko had been escorted into the medical wing just ten minutes ago and strapped down to the observation table with heavy metal and leather restraints by three armed guards. She’d screamed, shouted, bit and fought the entire time, desperately trying to escape her captors. It’d felt like being a child all over again, being forced to see Dr. Ishida. It was a situation she was not nostalgic for. It was just too much. She yanked and gnawed at her restraints, but she’d never be able to escape unless someone let her out.

“I wonder what amateur wrote down that you were incapable of using the Quirks of the people you transform into. I never would’ve cleared this to enter a patient’s file without rigorous testing to the contrary. Some people just aren’t diligent these days. They don’t take their jobs seriously,” Dr. Ishida sighed, resting his weight on the table Himiko was strapped to as he spoke.

“I see you’ve used Uraraka-san’s Zero Gravity as well as Bubaigawara-san’s Double. Care to elaborate if you’ve ever used anyone else’s Quirk,” Dr. Ishida asked, but his question was met only with more hissing and gnawing at her restraints.

“I understand you insist on struggling, Himi-chan, but I promise this’ll be over a lot quicker if you cooperate. Not that that’s ever stopped you from struggling before,” Dr. Ishida sighed again as he took her vitals. Temperature, blood oxygen, blood pressure. Himiko struggled against her restraints like a caged animal desperate to escape. She hated him touching her. She hated him even looking at her. And she didn’t believe a word he said. She’d heard it all before. He’d do anything to further his experiments- he was a madman .

“First we need to verify your Quirk since it’s never been legally verified… Formalities, you understand,” Dr. Ishida explained, raising a couple vials of blood to his face. “It used to be so much more difficult to conduct these tests. We had to rely on the patient cooperating. It was nearly impossible to tell if they were hiding some aspect of their Quirk, or just unaware of it. These days, we have experimental technology designed to forcibly activate Quirks. Modeled off All For One’s stolen garish tendril Quirk, actually. I legally have to explain to you that if you don’t cooperate, we must use the equipment. I doubt that’ll convince you to be cooperative, will it Himi-chan?” Himiko slammed her arm against her wrist bindings, making them thunk loudly against the cold metal binding them to the table. There was nothing he could promise her that would make her cooperate. She’d kill him the moment she had the chance to- of that, she was certain.

“Of course, of course,” Dr. Ishida sighed before cleaning a strip around Himiko’s forearm with an alcohol wipe. Then he wrapped a band around her forearm and tightened it with a buckle before pressing a button on the device. It beeped loudly as it came to life but then did nothing.

“Your Quirk requires a catalyst. Not uncommon for Emitter Quirks, but I loathe to categorize you as just an Emitter Quirk. We might need to start accepting hybrid categorizations soon.” He spoke loudly and clearly, as if he were talking to Himiko, but she knew his words weren’t for her. There was nothing to respond to. She didn’t care to talk to him.

“First we’ll activate the Quirk Band to see if you’ve got any blood left in your system, or if there’s another catalyst besides blood. One final warning, Himi-chan. I’ve heard the Quirk Band is rather uncomfortable. Are you sure you’d rather not cooperate with me?”

Himiko narrowed her eyes and spit at him, the glob landing on his chest and soiling his labocat.. 

“People truly don’t change, do they, Himi-chan,” he said with a sigh. This hadn’t been the first time she’d spit at him. Remembering the last time almost made him nostalgic. Dr. Ishida conjured a remote from his smock pocket. Clearly it was to the Quirk Band. The band beeped as he clicked the remote, and Himiko screamed as what felt like three metal spikes pierced her flesh and muscle. Then the aching came. As if she’d run a marathon without stretching. She was familiar with the sensation- it always came whenever she tried to use her Quirk without any blood, or if she held a transformation too long and her body was nearly out of its catalyst. But this time it felt worse. It burned. Her muscles felt like they’d been pushed to their limit. Himiko grit her teeth and waited for it to be over.

“Patient exhibits baseline vitals. No physical change detected. Exactly what’d stumped previous Quirk Counselors for years,” Dr. Ishida was talking aloud, likely to whatever recorder he was using for the session.

“Unlike true Quirkless individuals- the rarity they are- she’s exhibiting typical reactions of patients that require catalysts. A good comparison would be… hm, in my nostalgia I’m remembering Shinsou-san. Yes, very similar.” Himiko thrashed against her bindings, fists clenched so tightly her nails were breaking the skin of her palm.

“For use as a catalyst, I’ve four samples I’d like the patient to ingest to knock out a few different hypotheses. Patient has a long and storied history of non-cooperation, and currently is trying to assault me, so we’ll be going ahead with the force-feeding along with the Quirk Band.” Before Himiko could even register what he’d said to close her mouth, he’d forced a gag between her teeth. She screamed and shouted and attempted to bite his fingers, but he was well acquainted with his patient. She’d tried this all before, and where she’d gotten rusty fighting him off after all these years, he’d only refined his craft.

“Sorry, Himi-chan. I promise I’ll try and do this quickly so you can get back to your parent- oh! Excuse me. Look at me falling into old habits. Back to your cell, apologies.” Himiko really didn’t hear what she was saying over her own muffled screaming. It was only cut off as he forced a tube down her throat. All of this was so familiar to her. They’d done things like this twice a week for years while they were trying to discover her Quirk. She’d kept the memories of these incidents buried so deep she’d thought she’d forgotten them, but now…

“We’ve restrained the patient and are delivering increasingly powerful ten second long electric shocks at 60 second intervals. This should rule out any strength amplification Quirks- those can be difficult to diagnose in female patients without proper incentive,” Dr. Ishida had explained, mostly to the nurse that was accompanying him, but her mother was within earshot.

“Is her screaming… normal,” Fuku Toga had asked, watching her daughter’s face contort in agony on the other side of the bulletproof glass barrier. The doctor had explained that it was for everyone’s safety- just in case Himiko had an explosive reaction to discovering a strength based Quirk.

“Well, she is in a fair amount of pain at the moment. And it’ll only ramp up during the test. But don’t worry, Toga-san, I promise we’ll get to the bottom of your daughter’s Quirk,” Dr. Ishida had explained. Himiko had been six years old when she watched her mother lock eyes with her, press her hand to the glass, and look away from her daughter.

“I sure do hope you solve this puzzle soon. She’ll never be respected if she keeps acting like this!”

“Interesting, very interesting! The first sample was saliva disguised as blood. After the patient ingested and the Quirk Band was used, the patient exhibited no signs of her Quirk working. I’ll be scheduling more tests with different body fluids- tears and sweat come to mind, let’s avoid anything too unpleasant. However I believe it’s safe to say blood is the only catalyst to Toga-san’s Quirk.” Dr. Ishida’s large, upturned fangs were unsettling as Himiko watched him talk to himself. He looked like a monster. A monster she’d had nightmares about for years. In fact, he still haunted her worst dreams. Every once in a while she’d wake up from a fitful sleep covered in sweat, the memory of those protruding fangs sharp in her mind.

“Next we’re going to be performing a rather interesting experiment. This next sample was collected from a woman in the third trimester of pregnancy. Normally I’d refrain from performing a test like this considering the likely outcomes- ethical concerns for this one are significantly high- however I was encouraged to ensure we determine the full extent of Toga Himiko’s Quirk. I’ll be feeding it to the patient now.”

“We’ve had to change school districts again! Whatever her Quirk is, it’s making her sick, Dr. Ishida. She’s not normal,” Fuku had sobbed. It’d been years since she’d started bringing her daughter in twice a week for treatment. The doctors didn’t seem any closer to discovering the girl’s Quirk. It’d stumped over a dozen specialists so far.

“Of course, of course, Toga-san. I can imagine this is incredibly frustrating for your entire family. Fortunately as her thirteenth birthday draws closer we’ll legally be able to try a wider variety of tests on her-”

“Why can’t you just try them now,” Fuku had interrupted, bouncing back and forth between crying and lashing out in anger while Himiko tried to distract herself. If she bit down on her finger just hard enough to draw some blood, she could have a small taste and it’d heal before her mother even realized what she was doing.

“My daughter is not well-”

“Toga-san, we all want little Himi-chan to get the help she needs, but performing these tests on someone so young isn’t advisable! Her thirteenth birthday is just in a couple of months. Once she’s of age we can begin the new batch of tests right away.”

Himiko sobbed as she felt the familiar feeling of the warm goo pour from her pores, melting away the shape of the person she’d been forced to become and returning her body back to her own. The change had been awful- her Quirk working outside of her own control. She’d never been forced to use her Quirk the way All For One had forced Magne or Kurogiri, but she doubted that’d it’d felt so… disturbing.

She choked back tears. In all the years she’d been on the run, she’d never taken the blood of someone pregnant. The experience hadn’t been pleasant.

“Patient has returned to normal. No abnormalities detected. Thankfully she only presented as pregnant and no signs of a fetus were detected. As a quick note, I still can’t believe that her Quirk extends to even the clothing the donor was wearing at the time. I’ll have to try some more experiments to see how far that aspect of the Quirk stretches,” Dr. Ishida spoke as if Himiko couldn’t hear him planning the next experiments. Himiko shuddered as he spoke, realizing how close she’d come to… She pushed the thought away.

“Next two samples come from the same donor. The first sample was collected before the patient underwent a double mastectomy for sex reassignment surgery. I’ve heard he’s quite happy with the results. The second sample was taken directly after the surgery. This experiment is twofold- the first test is to determine if the patient’s Quirk can recreate tissue that no longer exists in the current donor as long as the blood was drawn previous to the surgery. The second is to determine if the patient’s Quirk can replicate injuries such as surgical amputations.” Dr. Ishida readied both vials, humming to himself as he did so.

“Himi-chan, I’ve heard you’ve got no real issue using your Quirk on men, but I chose someone with similar anatomy to yours to make this experience a bit less uncomfortable for you. I don’t expect gratitude, but I do hope you’ll be more cooperative during our next session,” he explained as he fed her the first vial.

Himiko glared at him as that phrase about gratitude sounded incredibly familiar.

“We’ve ruled out amplification type Quirks, control type Quirks, dozens of classes of heteromorph type Quirks… This is a tough nut to crack-”

“You people aren’t trying hard enough! I heard that there’s an entire class of Quirks you guys aren’t allowed to test for yet,” Fuku had accused, arms crossed over her chest while Himiko pretended to be working on homework. She tried to shrink down, as small as she could. The less either her mother or Dr. Ishida noticed her, the less likely they were to try another test on her today.

“Toga-san… I’m not sure of what you’re asking-”

“There’re Deviant Quirks! I’ve heard of them! Quirks that people commit despicable acts with! X rated Quirks that-”

“Toga-san. Your daughter has just turned thirteen years of age. I will not test for such Quirks until she’s at least seventeen! Even if she does possess one of those Quirks, it’s not in her best interest to recognize it until she’s old enough to make those decisions on her own! Please, Toga-san. She’s just a child-”

“If you don’t start testing I’ll take her to someone who will.” Fuku had narrowed her eyes at the man, waiting to be given exactly what she wanted. Himiko had remembered not exactly understanding what it was her mother had been demanding, but knew that her mother was someone who always got what it was she wanted.

“No one will risk their license for that, Toga-san,” Dr. Ishida said, calling her bluff with a roll of his own eyes. He wasn’t going to be intimidated by anyone.

“However- not that I expect any gratitude- what I will do for you and Himi-chan is I’ll start looking into such Quirks,” he sighed begrudgingly, casting a quick glance to Himiko before returning his gaze back to Fuku. “I’ve only had to test for them about three times in my whole career, and on much older patients than Himiko is now. If you insist, I will do some research to see if there are any less invasive ways to test for these Quirks.”

“The patient’s Quirk is incredible. I’ve never seen a Transformation Quirk with such a specific catalyst or an Emitter Quirk with such a profound effect on the user’s body. Both tests were positive- the patient displayed breast tissue with the first vial and injuries congruent with the double mastectomy with the second vial. Incredible how her Quirk has a temporal factor to it. I’d love to run some more tests if she were more cooperative. Himi-chan, think about it. I could get you out of your cell for a few hours a week. It could be nice.”

Himiko glared at the man, making it clear if she had some Quirk akin to Dabi’s Blueflame that he’d be as much of a crisp as her deceased friend. No amount of bribing would change her mind.

“Okay, okay. Only one experiment left, Himi-chan. This donor experienced a traumatic injury to one of her kidneys a year before the blood was drawn. You replicated surgical amputations. I’d just like to see if you’d replicate injuries to vital organs.”

“She keeps injuring herself! Over and over again! She’s desperate for blood! It’s disgusting,” Arata Toga had shouted, slamming his fists on Dr. Ishida’s desk. He never came to these doctor’s appointments himself, but he’d been called in to specifically attend this one. He was beyond furious. They’d been testing for years. Something had to give.

“Dr. Toga, you of all people should understand her urges aren’t necessarily violent-”

“How dare you?! Never in my life have I needed Quirk Counseling because of my Quirk! I’ve never felt the urge to drink blood! My daughter is broken and you’re not even bothering to try to fix her,” he shouted even louder.

“Dr. Toga. Please, let’s just conduct this one test. Just a small bit of blood, and we’ll see if she can move it. Her Quirk might be incredibly similar to your own-”

“MY QUIRK DOESN’T MAKE ME A FREAK,” he’d roared. Himiko remembered not even being upset by that. She’d heard her father call her worse. Freak was at least nicer than some of the other things he’d called her…

Dr. Ishida did his best not to react to Arata’s outburst as he prepared the vial of donated blood. He reached for Himiko’s hand, and Himiko winced at the offer. She really didn’t want to take it. She hated these sorts of experiments. But… if there was blood involved… If she really had the chance to feel some blood between her fingers… She reached out and let the doctor take her hand.

“Himi-chan, we’re just going to pour a bit on your hand and you’re going to do your best to move it or manipulate it in some way. Please, do your best,” Dr. Ishida had urged before pouring a couple of drops of the liquid into Himiko’s palm.

Himiko watched, stunned as the blood hit her palm. It was still warm- still fresh! Himikko hadn’t even realized she’d been holding her breath in anticipation, but the second she breathed in she got a whiff of it that was so overwhelming yet not enough at all. It smelled like rust as it beaded at the center of her palm. It was… beautiful.

“I didn’t bring her here for you to indulge her disgusting cravings,” Arata hissed, his hands clenched as he watched his daughter be stunned by the blood in her palm. It disgusted him to his core to see her act like this over something like blood. It wasn’t what he’d hoped for when he’d had a daughter. 

“I am as much of a medical professional as you are, Dr. Toga. You have to give these things time. If her Quirk is even remotely similar to- Himi-chan no!” Dr. Ishida had grabbed Himiko’s wrist just as the young girl had tried to bring the blood to her mouth. Himiko screamed and cried and thrashed against the man’s hold on her, desperate for just a taste! If she could just lick the blood off her palm-

“This is the last time we bring her here, you fraud,” Arata hissed, grabbing his daughter and plunging his own finger into the blood. With some strain he gathered up every drop of blood and removed it from Himiko’s hand. Not a molecule of the red liquid remained, but Himiko still desperately tried to lick at her palm the moment it’d been released, hoping that she could taste even the essence of the blood that’d been there. There were tears in her eyes as she’d come so close just to be denied again.

“Dr. Toga-”

“Himiko. Let’s go,” Arata hissed, pulling his daughter out of the room before she could take too long to respond on her own. Himiko had looked back for just a moment, genuinely upset she hadn’t had the chance to taste the blood, but grateful that her father had seemed serious about never having to come here again. She’d never have to see Dr. Ishida again. She’d never have to deal with these tests or anything like that…

That’d been less than a week before she’d attacked Saito…

“No damage detected. Your body can replicate the symptoms of a pregnancy as well as surgical amputations, but it can’t actually damage your own organs. That makes sense, but how interesting,” Dr. Ishida mused to himself.

“Okay, Himi-chan. Thank you for this session. You’ve really provided a ton of insight into how fascinating your Quirk is. I’m already thinking about what we could accomplish with next week’s session! Please, try to be a little more cooperative when we next meet. I’ll put in a good word for you tonight and you should get enough money for a fun treat in your commissary for tomorrow. Sound fair?”

The only fun treat Himiko could imagine wanting was a scalpel she could drive into this man’s throat.

“Your typing is improving quickly, Toga-san. You’re hardly looking at the keyboard anymore,” Atsuhiro said encouragingly, gently patting Himiko on the shoulder. “You’ve been practicing with that keyboard I bought you, haven't you? Great work!”

“Or she’s just not ancient, old man,” Spinner said with a small chuckle, playfully nudging Atsuhiro with his shoulder. “You know us younger generations are quick to pick up typing.”

“Age or not, Toga-san still deserves the praise she’s earned,” Atsuhiro sighed, playfully waving off Spinner’s commentary.

“Thank you,” Himiko said softly, a small smirk on her face as she slurped up some more noodles. Her friends being here at least made living in Tartarus slightly more bearable.

“Speaking of being ancient, any reason we have guests today,” Spinner asked, finally turning his attention to Kaina and Danjuro- Lady Nagant and Gentle Criminal.

“That’s not very polite,” Danjuro said flatly, raising a bushy eyebrow at Spinner for his comment. Himiko had never really known the man- she’d only watched his videos from time to time whenever she was close enough to a tv to watch the news- but after just a couple of days of getting to know him it was easy to understand the man was as kindhearted and gentle as his villain name suggested. Tomura probably would’ve hated him.

“Forgive him, all those extra Quirks haven’t exactly helped his interpersonal skills. I’m sure you understand,” Mr. Compress said quickly, hoping to smooth over Spinner’s jab. He was the only one of the remaining League of Villains to remember the kind of respect Lady Nagant used to draw during her hero days. She’d been a rising star set to easily take the Top 10 before her controversy, and was likely incredibly dangerous, even in a wheelchair.

“Sure…” Kaina focused on her own meal, not raising her purple eyes for even a moment to entertain the conversation any further. She wasn’t exactly social even though she never split off from the group whenever they went to lunch. Himiko thought that was odd, and had been curious as to why someone like Kaina Tsutsumi would still be in Tartarus, let alone hanging out with former League of Villains members. She would’ve asked her outright had it not been for the loud voice coming from the middle of the usually quiet cafeteria.

“What’s happening over there,” Atsuhiro asked curiously, lifting his gaze from his food to find the culprit.

“Come on, Rappa-san. Think about it. You could use all those muscles for some good!” Mustard was making a point to be heard, his voice carrying even louder as people began to quiet their own conversations to listen in on what he was saying. Everyone’s eyes were glued to the two men, interested in seeing what this mouthy teenager was doing as he tried to goad a Hassaikai member.

“You, me and Imasuji-san! Just a couple of pals! Don’t make me have to tell him you said no. I don’t think he’d be very happy about that-”

“Threaten me again punk and I’ll remind you who the muscle in your little group is,” Kendo said flatly, his face blank even while his eyes were obscured by his unruly hair. He didn’t even sit up from his seat at his table or put down his chopsticks. He wasn’t intimidated by Mustard in the slightest, and was refusing to allow the teen to get under his skin.

Still, from the way everyone was bristling watching the exchange, Himiko could guess that whatever politics were at play here, Kendo likely couldn’t sit back without acting for long. Especially with the way Mustard kept bringing up Muscular’s name.

 “Listen, lughead! There’s no need to get that dense brain of yours in a tizzy! You’re fully aware that you’re not strong enough to fight Imasuji-san so why don’t you just stop trying to be tough and-”

The backhand was loud enough to be heard across the entire cafeteria. Kendo had backhand slapped Mustard across the face, sending the teen to his knees before returning to his food just as quickly. Mustard hardly caught himself before he hit the floor completely, and even on his knees he was still clearly reeling from the blow. He covered his mouth in pain, but that didn’t stop the blood that quickly poured between his fingers and left a small puddle on the floor. Whoever hadn’t been watching the exchange was suddenly very invested now.

“Bastard,” Mustard hissed, spitting more blood onto the floor as he swore. Himiko couldn’t help but chuckle at his misfortune. She’d always thought Mustard had such a punchable face, and his actions had never exactly helped him out.

“GUARD! QUIRK USE ON THE FLOOR,” Mustard shouted, pointing at Kendo as the man continued to enjoy his rice bowl. The high-schooler made a point of quickly smearing his own blood on his face, making the attack look far worse than it’d actually been. From a simple cut lip and nosebleed to a blood mess all over his mouth and cheeks. Two of the guards were quick to the scene, jogging over with their batons ready.

“We’ve told you this before, yakuza. Assaulting a fellow inmate earns yourself a punishment. Quirk use gets you solitary,” one of the guards said, doing his best to sound intimidating. The guard was about 6’3” and likely used to believing his size would always serve to intimidate others. Unfortunately Kendo was a giant of a man who wasn’t at all intimidated even while sitting down.

“Go away. I’m eating my mapo tofu,” Kendo said flatly, not looking up from his meal as the guard brought the baton down on his shoulder as hard as he could.

“Hey… Hey this isn’t right.” Himiko started wheeling herself towards the scene before Kaina and Atsuhiro quickly grabbed the handles of her chair.

“What are you doing, Toga-san. You don’t want to get involved with that,” Atsuhiro said quickly.

“Interfering with the guards is only going to get you in as much trouble as he’s in,” Kaina explained.

Himiko didn’t listen to either of them, pushing down on her wheels hard enough to wrench her wheelchair free of her friends’ grasp. She had to stop what was happening to Kendo. It wasn’t fair to punish him for something Mustard had started!

“Hey! Hey!” Himiko shouted as she neared the guards. They were both beating Kendo as hard as they could, breaking skin and causing the man to groan in pain, but he just kept eating. As if defying the guards was his only purpose. As if defying the guards gave him purpose.

“He didn’t use his Quirk,” Himiko shouted as she got even nearer, desperately tugging at the shirt of one of the guards. She needed to catch their attention to make them stop!

“Rappa didn’t use his Quirk! Sando’s just whining!” Himiko kept tugging at the guards until one finally turned around, eyes red with fury. He whacked Himiko across the jaw with a baton, sending the young woman rolling a few feet back in her wheelchair from the force of the blow. She’d been hit so hard she was seeing stars and hearing a loud ringing in her ears. Her senses only returned to her in time to hear Spinner, Atsuhiro and Danjuro desperately pleading with the guard who was still trying to hit her.

“She’s new! She doesn’t understand-”

“Please forgive my youthful compatriot, sometimes she acts without thinking. Her body just moves all on its own, you understand?”

They were practically using their bodies as shields between the guard and Himiko, but that wasn’t enough to protect her entirely. The guard raised his baton, ready to strike Himiko across the face again. Himiko flinched away, but just as the guard’s arm hit the highest point of the arc of his swing, Rappa grabbed the man’s arm and snapped it as easily as he would cheap chopsticks. The guard howled in pain, swearing in English as he held his limp and broken arm.

“I’m done with my meal,” Kendo said flatly. About a dozen more guards flooded into the cafeteria, angrily beating the man with their batons and forcing him to his knees. Kendo was clearly in pain, but even as blood trickled down his face from a wound he’d gotten on his eyebrow, he didn’t let out a sound of pain. He refused to give the guards the satisfaction. Instead, he kept his intense yellow gaze on Himiko, an odd look on his face as he was forced to lay on the ground and handcuffed behind his back.

It took the guards about five minutes to escort him out of the cafeteria, and the entire time, Kendo had kept his gaze on Himiko. She’d been forced to watch every moment of it, unable to look away as they continued to beat him.

Only when Rappa had finally been escorted out of the lunchroom and the commotion died down a little did Mustard wipe his own face, a big, twisted grin tugging at his lips. He glared at his fellow inmates in front of him- Gentle Criminal, Mr. Compress, Spinner and Himiko- in disgust.

“You guys care so much about that meathead? Pfft! It’d do you all well enough to stay out of business that doesn’t concern you,” he spat, his brown eyes narrowing as he glared at Himiko hardest of all.

“And you,” he hissed, pointing an accusatory finger at her. Spinner and Danjuro instantly moved between them, while Himiko felt a couple of hands on the back of her wheelchair that she knew must be Atsuhiro.

“I heard you had visitors last week, Himiko. And not just any visitors either. Pro Heroes Deku and Uravity,” the entire cafeteria went quiet at that. It was pretty likely most of the villains here had only gotten caught because of either of those two heroes. Or any of their classmates or heroes affiliated with them. Deku and Uravity had made huge names for themselves in the months since the war, not to mention the war itself.

“You think those two heroes care about you? They locked you up in Tartarus! Locked you up with the rest of us! It’s been almost a year and they still haven’t even come for Tobita-san or Tsutsumi-san. It’s about time all of you learn what side of the bars you’re on. You’re here for the rest of your lives,” Mustard hissed, doing his best to put on the air of someone in control. Someone with some amount of authority. The act made Himiko take him even less seriously.

“Don’t get in my way again,” he huffed, pushing past Danjuro on his way out of the cafeteria. It wasn’t until the quiet chatter in the cafeteria had started up again before Spinner and Danjuro wheeled their friends back to the table they’d been eating at.

“Kid’s crazy,” Spinner hissed, shaking his reptilian head in frustration.

“True, but he’s only going to get more obnoxious,” Atushiro sighed, trying to calculate the best options available to them. He was always trying to resolve a conflict before it’d even started.

“That was stupid,” Kaina said flatly the moment Himiko and the others were close enough to hear her. “You could’ve gotten yourself and everyone else hurt. For Rappa-san? Why did you do that?”

“... sorry… I… my body just… moved on its own,” Himiko explained, unable to meet anyone’s eyes. She was so upset with herself that she’d failed to help Kendo and put her friends in danger that she missed the slight glance Danjuro and Kaina paid one another.

Chapter Text

“You’re picking up English incredibly quickly, Toga-san. Are you sure you only ever got Bs in the subject,” Atsuhiro asked, playfully ruffling Himiko’s hair. Himiko waved her arms at him like a sister angry at her older brother before fixing her hair. It’d taken her so long to find a style she liked without any hair ties, and she still wasn't sure if she even liked what she was able to do with it now.

“I’m telling you, Sako. She could’ve been one of those gyaru girls that always drop one or two English words a sentence,” Spinner chuckled as he wheeled his two friends towards Atsuhiro’s cell. They’d just finished their shifts, and were glad to have at least a couple of hours to themselves. They spent as much time as they could in Atsuhiro’s comfy cell- even Kaina and Danjuro had come over once or twice. Atsuhiro was happy to host, and his friends were happy to give him the attention an entertainer of his caliber deserved.

“Ah, yes! With the makeup and the amazing hair? I’m always in awe of how high-schoolers always manage to find a fun way to express themselves,” Atsuhiro said sincerely. Any way he could praise Himiko, he’d take. He was just explaining to Spinner just how far Himiko had come in her English proficiency. It’d only been a couple of weeks since she’d been at Tartarus and she’d grown so comfortable with her keyboard she was typing without even looking, and she was quickly getting familiar with the English alphabet.

“I just hope they let me stick with it after I get out of the wheelchair,” Himiko mumbled. She knew this was the kind of work they only gave to people who were physically disabled, and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could pretend her legs weren’t getting stronger. Just this morning she’d been able to walk to her toilet just fine without needing to hold onto something along the way. Truth be told, she was honestly worried about the kind of work they’d give her if she were able. Spinner and Danjuro refused to talk about it, and all Kaina did was emphasize how imperative it was for Himiko to keep pretending. Atsuhiro and Spinner paused for a moment, catching each other’s eye. Just from their look alone, she knew it wasn’t very likely.

“Well, with your eyepatch posing as a continuing disability, they might be more inclined to keep you working the translation booths if you prove exceptionally valuable,” Atsuhiro explained. He was trying to give her hope. Even here in this bleak prison, they had to make every tiny glimmer of it count. Himiko decided to hold onto it for today.

The trio was about halfway to Atsuhiro’s cell when all hell broke loose. Prison alarms began blaring- piercingly loud sirens that echoed painfully in the cramped hallways and bright flashing lights that made it nearly impossible to keep your eyes open. Himiko covered her ears, flinching at the pounding noise.

“What IS that,” Himiko screamed, trying to be heard over the sirens. Every day at Tartarus was practically the same. The food hardly changed, their uniforms hardly changed. The only reasons to mark the days for Himiko were to see how much longer before her next meeting with Izuku and Ochako, and her next meeting with Dr. Ishida. These blaring alarms were devastatingly new.

“Someone’s escaped from solitary,” Spinner shouted back. He was already pushing them as quickly as he could through the narrow hallways, desperate to get back to Atsuhiro’s cell and out of trouble.

Himiko narrowed her eyes at that. Someone escaped solitary? Not even the Tartarus campus? Just solitary? How could that possibly warrant so many alarms? She watched as almost a dozen guards ran down an intersecting hallway, not even stopping for a moment to bother with them. They were all armed and clad in riot gear. Whoever it was that’d escaped… They were clearly dangerous.

“We’ve gotta get back to your cell before they start the lockdown,” Spinner hissed, turning down another hallway. He was doing his best to keep his friends at a consistent pace, but pushing two wheelchairs down narrow hallways wasn’t exactly easy.

“Lockdown? You don’t think it’s…” Atsuhiro didn’t finish his sentence, not wanting to worry Himiko. Unfortunately, she’d already put the pieces together herself. She couldn’t imagine there were very many prisoners in Tartarus after the war that’d warrant such an alarm. All For One, Dabi, and Shigaraki were already dead, after all.

“It’s Haken, isn’t it?”

Spinner didn’t answer, too focused on getting his friends to safety. They were just a few hallways away from Atsuhiro’s cell. If they could just make it there in time, they could avoid-

Spinner came to a halt so fast Himiko nearly slid out of her chair. They’d rounded one final corner before arriving at a scene that felt like it’d been scripted in a horror movie. They watched, slack-jawed, as someone clad in a black straightjacket stood over the body of eight guards and nearly a dozen prisoners. He was shuddering and chattering to himself in excitement, his teeth slicing through flesh and bone as he dismembered the bodies in front of him.

Definitely Haken.

The flashing lights cast eerie shadows on Moonfish’s shuddering form. The blaring sirens drowned out his moans of pleasure as blood poured from his mouth and down the blades of his teeth. It was the kind of sight that anyone would see and claim they’d witnessed a monster. Himiko watched as over a dozen sharp blades pierced through the bodies in front of him again, slicing through meat and viscera like it was nothing. It was terrifying, sure, but between the troughs of the alarms, Himiko thought she could hear Haken saying something. Repeating it over and over again.

Spinner was far less interested in whatever Haken was saying and slowly began wheeling his friends back out of the hallway. If they could just stay quiet… if Haken could be so engrossed in his macabre meal that he didn’t notice them…

Pushing two wheelchairs down a cramped hallway wasn’t the easiest task. Spinner accidentally scraped the metal hub of Atsuhiro’s chair against the wall, causing it to squeak and groan in protest.

The reaction was immediate- before he’d even turned around, Haken had sent a dozen bladed teeth shooting out at the trio. His attack speed was blindingly fast, and Himiko was hardly able to track the teeth with her eyes. She braced herself against the incoming pain of those blades, gritting her teeth and clenching her fists. If she weren’t confined to the wheelchair, she might’ve been able to hide. Blend into her surroundings. It was a skill she’d gotten so good at she was able to do it even while hiding in plain sight. Staying just inside someone’s blind-spot long enough to strike. As it was, she couldn’t avoid the blades- not on her own.

Spinner jumped over his friends, putting himself between them and the deranged man. Blood spurted from dozens of deep wounds as large, red plates erupted from his skin and covered them like tiles on a floor. Himiko could hear his bones creaking as he grew large enough to block the entire hallway. He roared in pain- not from the blades he’d deflected, but from the sheer overwhelming ache the Quirks All For One had given him caused him.

“Haken! It’s us! It’s the League! Please,” Atsuhiro shouted, desperately trying to make himself heard over the blaring sirens. He knew the man wouldn’t be able to see them through the thick leather strap that covered his eyes as part of the straightjacket uniform Death Row inmates wore, but maybe if he could just listen to them? Maybe if he recognized them he might pause his bloodthirsty attack?

Haken groaned again as he shot out another couple of blades, desperate to impale his prey on them. The blades crashed loudly against Spinner’s scales, some breaking off entirely while others left deep gouges in his Scalemail. Moonfish’s teeth blades were incredibly sharp, but Spinner’s Scalemail was keeping him safe… for now.

“RUN!” Spinner’s voice was deep and desperate. Himiko knew how hard it was for Spinner to think clearly when he was using his other Quirks like this. They took so much blood away from his head that his brain was practically starving for oxygen. He’d described it as a thick fog that addled weighed down every thought, making them nearly impossible to process. Still, the one thing he knew to say was for his friends to get to safety.

“Toga-san! Let’s go,” Atsuhiro shouted, tugging on the young woman’s wheelchair and trying to snap her back to the present. They had to leave. There was no way Spinner would be able to protect them and himself while fighting Moonfish in these cramped hallways.

“We can’t leave him,” Himiko shouted desperately. They had to be able to do something! Spinner was their friend and he was putting his life on the line for them!

“We’ll get guards,” Atsuhiro shouted, tugging on Himiko’s chair again and practically pulling her wheelchair along with him. He only let go when he felt Himiko try to turn herself around to follow him on her own. Himiko felt awful leaving Spinner like this, but maybe with the help of some guards he might be safer than if he’d just been with her? They had to get some guards.

Himiko cast a last glance over her shoulder as she sped behind Atsuhiro, watching as Spinner grabbed a handful of the bladed teeth in his hand and snapped them in his palm. The blades left more gouges in his armor, but Spinner kept fighting through the pain while Haken tried to extend even more blades past him and towards the other two. Spinner was giving it everything he had, and it still hardly looked like enough. Could Haken get in a lucky blow? Did Spinner’s Scalemail defend against attacks to his eyes or other weak points? He’d lost to that Octopus boy from UA. The one Himiko had called creepy not so long ago. Was there a chance Haken might be able to kill their friend?

The hallways felt abnormally long. Like they were stuck in miles and miles of catacombs. They passed dozens of cells, locked with their prisoners taking refuge inside. Haken was clearly enough of a threat that most people would’ve rather just be out of the way. Atsuhiro seemed just as desperate as Himiko was as he searched for some guards that could help them. It felt like an eternity just to make it down the end of one hallway and round a corner, the entire structure seemingly built to feel like a maze on purpose to hinder escapees.

Himiko couldn’t have been sure if it’d been three or thirty minutes before they finally came across a group of about a half-dozen armed guards.

“What are you two doing outside of your cells! There’s a lockdown,” one of the guards shouted, removing his baton from his holster. He instantly saw them as a threat. It didn’t matter how desperate or bloody they looked. It didn’t matter that they were both in wheelchairs. They were villains and that’s all those guards would’ve ever seen.

“It’s Haken-san! He’s escaped! Iguchi-san’s holding him off! You must help him,” Atsuhiro insisted, pointing back down the hallway they’d come from. He didn’t even fear for his own safety as he wheeled towards them, not hesitating for a moment as he tried to direct the guards towards his friend.

“Haken? Fucking Moonfish,” one of the guards said in English. Clearly one of the American guards that’d been drafted from overseas. Even he was aware of how destructive and deadly Haken’s Quirk was, and the other guards didn’t look particularly excited about the situation either.

“What are we supposed to do about him,” another guard asked incredulously. “He’s already killed over three dozen guards in previous attempts.” They all kept muttering among themselves. This was almost the exact opposite of what Himiko had hoped for. Shouldn’t these guards be rushing in to help Spinner? Wouldn’t that make the most sense? If Spinner was helping wouldn’t they be much safer than if they tried to take him on if Spinner died during the fight? Were all these guards really such cowards?

“... you said Iguchi’s holding him off,” one of the guards asked again, pointing at Atsuhiro.

“Yes, he’s just around the corner! If you guys move you might be able to-”

“What if we just let them kill each other?”

Himiko felt her blood turn to ice. They weren’t just cowards. They were evil.

“... that’s a good idea,” one of the guards commented, nodding her head as if the first guard had had the greatest idea of a lifetime.

“You can’t do that,” Himiko said, her voice not even audible to Atsuhiro over the sounds of the sirens.

“Haken-jukeisha’s already on Death Row and Iguchi-jukeisha’s a freak. No one will miss either of them,” another guard explained, shrugging as if it were the obvious choice.

“You guys have to stop them,” Himiko shouted louder, her voice echoing in the hallway. She was desperate to get the guards to see reason. To help! Weren’t their lives still on the line?

“You wanna go stop them? Be my guest,” another guard said, pointing down the hallway Atsuhiro and Himiko had come from with his baton.

Himiko narrowed her eyes at all seven of the guards in front of her. Not a single one of them cared about her friend. Cared about her. They were just here to make their lives harder. They were worse than the League had been. She’d never felt so validated about having wanted to tear this stupid system down around her. Maybe she shouldn’t have stopped her Sad Man’s Legion. Maybe she’d thrown away her chance to make a change when she’d saved Ochako? Maybe… maybe she’d been right all along?

Himiko turned her chair around and moved as fast as she could back towards Spinner. She didn’t have time to think about what she should’ve done. If she could save Spinner now, she had to try.

“TOGA-SAN! TOGA-SAN, STOP!” Atsuhiro reached out for the back of her chair, but she was already too far away by the time he’d managed to turn around enough in his wheelchair.

Himiko pushed herself faster and faster. Back towards her friend who was risking his life to keep her safe. She didn’t care about the consequences, Spinner’s life was more valuable to her, and she might be the only person who could help save him. He’d already been bleeding before they’d left him behind. If she could just get a bit of that blood… She was positive she’d be able to use his Quirks to help. Spinner was such a close friend. If she was able to copy Jin’s Quirk then she’d certainly be able to copy his. And if fighting Haken alone was too much for Spinner, maybe together…

Himiko turned the corner as quickly as she could and skidded to a stop as she realized she was already too late.

Haken was resting against a far wall, most of his teeth broken or ripped out of his mouth. His straightjacket was torn and bloody, but still wrapped tightly around his arms and head. He was barely conscious, but still very much alive, muttering to himself as blood poured from his removed teeth.

Spinner…

Spinner was in much worse shape. He was laying face-down on the floor in a pool of his own blood. About a dozen of Haken’s blades were piercing his Scalemail along with dozens of deep, ugly gouges from where Haken’s teeth had only barely lost the battle against Spinner’s armor. One tooth was even lodged in his torso and sticking out of his back, having completely pierced through his body.

“Spinner!” Himiko moved closer to him, desperate to see if her friend was okay. He was still under the effects of his Body Bulk Quirk- so large that from shoulder to shoulder he was practically taking up the entire hallway. She couldn’t move any closer with her chair…

Himiko didn’t hesitate to slide out of her wheelchair, and crawled the rest of the way towards her friend. She scraped herself on his Scalemail and nearly cut herself on some of Haken’s broken teeth, but she didn’t care. She had to make her way up Spinner’s broken and bloody body towards his head. Her friend had risked his life for her…

Once she reached his face she desperately tried to get him to acknowledge her, gently tapping his face and moving his head to get him to open his eyes. The Scalemail was painful to the touch, rough and jagged, but she didn’t care.

“Spinner… Spinner, please,” Himiko begged. She didn’t have any of her equipment. None of her needles or her blood transfer machine or even her mask. She doubted she’d even be able to pierce his Scalemail to find an artery and give him her blood if she had her equipment. Even if she used her Quirk, there was no way for her to get her blood back into Spinner.

She still had to try!

Himiko cupped her hands and scooped up as much blood into her palms as she could. She could see her own reflection in Spinner’s dark, red blood. She could see her own eye looking back at her- the other covered with that black, itchy eyepatch Tartarus had given her. It was a face she barely even recognized. For just a fleeting moment, she hated the way she’d styled her hair, wishing she had some hair-ties…

She brought her hands to her mouth, ready to take a sip just as Spinner rested a finger on her wrist. He was so large, a single finger was nearly the size of her entire arm.

“No… No Quirk,” Spinner mumbled, his voice wheezing and breathy as he tried to force himself to speak. His eyes were glassy and unfocused. Blood was pouring from his mouth. Himiko could see how hard he was fighting. How he had to force each breath into his lungs.

“Spinner,” Himiko whispered, her eyes tearing up. She felt so helpless. What could she possibly do to help her friend?

“Hey! Get back!” Himiko hadn’t even heard the guards arrive. She shouted and thrashed as they dragged her away from Spinner. The guards didn’t care for a moment as they scraped her legs on the prison floor as they dragged her, only seeing her as just as much of a threat as Haken had been. They threw her into her chair, not even making sure she was seated properly before moving back to Spinner and Haken.

“Holy shit, these two did a number on each other,” she heard the American guard say, moving one of Haken’s blades with his foot.

“Looks like Haken won. Spinner’s basically meat,” another guard said, crouching down to get a better look at the man. She didn’t seem concerned at all for his well-being.

“You owe me twenty dollars. What’s that in Yen, Yamaguchi,” the American guard asked, playfully nudging his friend.

They didn’t care. If it hadn’t been obvious before, it was glaringly so now. They didn’t care about her or Spinner or anyone. Why even take this job unless you were some kind of sadist? Himiko grit her teeth, doing her best not to scream as she fought to pull herself properly into her wheelchair. She was so covered in blood she could hardly find purchase until Atushiro finally arrived and held it steady for her. She was so angry, but more than that, she was worried. She was worried for her friend.

“... is he gonna be okay,” Himiko asked, tears welling in her eyes.

“... he’s strong, Toga-san…”

That wasn’t an answer.

“Toga-san, is everything alright?”

“Hm?” The question snapped Himiko back to the present. She’d been zoning out, worried about Spinner. Wondering if he was okay. She hadn’t heard anything about him in the days since the incident, and she doubted any of the guards would be willing to tell her if she asked. She was in the dark, as were Atsuhiro and the rest of her little group. She was so worried about him, she couldn’t even focus on what Ochako and Izuku had been trying to tell her for the past few minutes

“Are they… Are the guards here treating you kindly,” Ochako asked, keeping her voice low to make sure the guards couldn’t hear her. Himiko looked over Ochako’s soft, round face. Usually the young woman always looked determined and so full of energy, but ever since she’d come back from the dead, Ochako just looked so tired. Like she’d barely been getting any sleep. Himiko wanted to ask why, but she was just so distracted thinking about Spinner.

“I… yea, it’s fine here” Himiko mumbled as she cast a glance down at the floor. She was honestly just glad the two heroes couldn’t see the scrapes and bruises on her legs from when she’d been dragged just a couple of days ago thanks to her pants. She doubted her lie would be very convincing if they could.

“Toga-san… If something’s wrong-”

“Tell me more about UA. You guys are still rebuilding,” Himiko asked, cutting off Izuku before he pushed any further. She just… didn’t have it in her to try to build any hope. If Izuku offered to help, she knew she’d just get hurt again somewhere down the line. That was how Tartarus worked. There was never any winning. Just a path towards less suffering that involved keeping one’s head as low as possible.

“Oh? Yes, we… Have you been getting our letters,” Ochako asked, a bit of energy entering her voice as she cocked her head and looked at Himiko. She seemed genuinely puzzled at the question, and Himiko realized she might’ve backed herself into a corner.

“... I…” Was there even a point in telling them? Every single letter they’d sent had been redacted. Every single one. Blacked out so she was unable to read more than a few phrases that made no sense out of context. And not a single package they’d sent had gotten to her without its contents being pilfered by the guards with nothing but the scent of manju cookies to clue her in to what she might’ve lost out on.

“Toga-san, please… We can help if you tell us,” Izuku insisted. He seemed so genuine. So sincere. So desperate for Himiko to reach out to him. Even now, all he wanted to do was help. Himiko really didn’t feel like she deserved it. She looked down at the tiled floor, wishing she could feel grass under her toes again. Just another thing she’d miss for the rest of her life while living in Tartarus.

“... Spinner was hurt the other day… They won’t tell me if he’s okay,” Himiko sighed, resting her head in her hands as she finally explained the issue. Why she’d been able to focus on the conversation they’d been having.

“And your letters… I can’t read them. They’re all backed out,” she admitted, fidgeting with her hands as she spoke. She wanted to believe that Izuku and Ochako could do something about it all. They were heroes after all, weren’t they? Couldn’t they… who knew?

“Blacked out? Like… redacted,” Izuku asked for clarification. He couldn’t imagine anything he’d said in his letters needing to be redacted. It just didn’t make any sense!

“I’ll go speak to the Warden,” Ochako said, her voice flat and even, as if she were trying not to show an ounce of emotion. She got up from her seat at the table and made her way towards the visitor’s room exit.

“Uraraka-san-”

“Wait here,” Ochako said sternly, turning back for just a moment as she spoke to Izuku. Izuku stopped in his tracks, having been in the process of getting up from his own chair before sitting back down. Ochako finally stormed out of the room, not even looking over her shoulder as she slammed the door behind herself.

Himiko watched with her eyes wide as the heroine stormed out of the visitor’s room. She couldn’t remember ever seeing Ochako so… stern? Forceful?

It was kinda hot…

“She um… She’s been having kind of a difficult time,” Izuku explained, a hint of worry in his voice. Himiko could see how much Izuku cared for Ochako shining back in those pretty green eyes of his. He was always so expressive… It was part of why she liked to see him covered in blood. He was just so… handsome…

Himiko couldn’t believe she was in a room alone with Izuku Midoriya, even if it was just the visitor’s room of a prison. She’d thought about a moment like this every night for almost an entire year while she fell deeper and deeper in love with him. She felt like she’d been falling off a cliff ever since she’d first seen him in that forest, bloody and broken and still so determined. It was love at first sight, and he was still pulling at her heartstrings.

And now they were finally alone, and he just wanted to talk about Ochako… Why couldn’t he ever see her the way he saw his classmate? Was she really so… undeserving? The urge to drink Ochako’s sweet, delicious blood flooded her mind. It was so powerful. If Izuku wouldn’t think of Himiko Toga so fondly, surely he’d think of his girlfriend, Ochako Uraraka positively? And if she could just be Ochako Uraraka…

That line of thought managed to give Himiko a bit of a headache. There was a memory that was fuzzy to her. Something she wasn’t quite sure about. She remembered every aspect of her life up to the day she’d died. But some of the details of that day seemed blurry. As if she were watching them from the other side of a rainy car window. She’d watched as much video of the war as she could find, but there were some things that’d never been recorded. She had to ask, now that she had him alone, without Ochako.

“... Izuku…?” Her voice was soft. Meek. She wouldn’t have recognized it if it hadn’t come from her own mouth.

“Yes, Toga-san?” Izuku leaned forward, practically desperate to be told that she needed help. Was this how good heroes were supposed to behave? Ready to drop anything to help at a moment’s notice? Stain had clearly seen something in Izuku Midoriya. Himiko couldn’t help but feel like her feelings towards this boy were validated any time he acted like this.

“I… My memory of the fight is… kind of fuzzy,” she admitted, taking off the itchy black eyepatch and holding it between her fingers. “I remember telling you how I felt… about you…?”

“... yes. You did,” Izuku admitted, his face turning red at the cheeks as Himiko brought up their conversation that day.

“And I remember feeling… disappointed… But… I don’t remember what you said.” The admission was frustrating. She remembered the emotional toll more than the words he’d said. She’d remembered feeling so resigned she was finally ready to tear the whole world down. But somehow despite how strong those feelings had been, she’d stopped herself just inches from her goal for Ochako. What’d happened to make her do something like that?

“I… I made a mistake and said something that made you upset without thinking,” Izuku admitted. Himiko’s heart fluttered like a dying butterfly at that. How could he still be so concerned for her emotions? Would Ochako mind that? 

“Can you remind me… Please?”

“You… You said…” Izuku fidgeted a little with the white gloves of his hero costume. As if what she’d admitted that day was just too vulnerable for him to repeat. He took a deep breath and tried again. “You said that you had feelings for me… ever since the summer camp…”

“Yea,” Himiko sighed, remembering that night like it was yesterday.

“You looked so cool…” Himiko watched Izuku’s face change a little. As if he were uncomfortable with that thought. Was he really uncomfortable with Himiko expressing any admiration for him? Could he really be so… cruel?

“You said you wanted to be me… And that you wanted to suck my blood…?” That was more of a question. As if he hadn’t been sure what he’d meant when she’d said it. Himiko nodded, not remembering those exact words, but knowing that would’ve been a part of any confession she’d ever make to someone.

“You said you wanted me to be your… boyfriend…?” He said that as if he really couldn’t believe it. Himiko’s heart sunk even further at that. Was it really so hard to believe? Was he disgusted by that admission? Himiko honestly couldn’t read Izuku. She was used to reading people who were trying to be deceptive, but the boy was just so honest…

“You explained that… you wanted to become the same as me,” he continued. That all sounded about right. She still honestly felt that way about him. And about Ochako. She really, truly did love them both. The desire to become them was overwhelming.

“I… told you that I know what that feels like. That I idolized All Might and wanted to be just like him…”

Himiko cocked her head at that. Why would Izuku Midoriya ever want to be like someone else? He was already so… amazing. Did he love All Might the way she loved him? No… no that didn’t seem right. There was a different emotion there. Something more confusing.

“I… Toga-san… Why do you… feel this way for me,” Izuku asked sincerely, snapping Himiko out of her own thoughts before she could dive too deep. “I… I’ve never had anyone…”

“It’s not very nice to make a girl explain that sort of thing,” Himiko mumbled, her face red as she touched the tips of her fingers together. She might be murdering terrorist scum to Japan, but she was still just an eighteen year old girl…

“Sorry! Sorry, I just… I’m trying to understand,” Izuku explained, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. He might be the world’s greatest hero and a symbol of peace that’s surpassed All Might’s legacy, but he was still just a seventeen year old boy.

“Why me?”

“Well… At the time, I guess I thought it was important that you looked like my first crush,” Himiko explained, thinking back to her feelings that night. He really did look so much like Saito. They could’ve been brothers.

“Saito-san? From the trial,” Izuku asked.

“Yeah… him…” Thinking about him now really bothered Himiko. There was just something off about everything. She couldn’t find those same feelings for Saito that she’d had for him at the time. She had no idea why she’d done what she’d done. It was… odd. Maybe it’d all just been a mistake? One single mistake that’d led to her entire life crashing down around her? If only she’d gotten the chance to meet Izuku earlier…

“But… I don’t care about that now,” she admitted, blushing a little harder as she tried to diffuse the situation. The last thing she wanted was for her current to crush to feel like she was still in love with her past crush. Even if that’d been her first…

“You’re… a lot prettier than I thought he was at the time. He’d been really nice to me so I fell in love with him but… My feelings for you are so much stronger,” she admitted, barely able to meet Izuku’s bright green eyes. She felt like she didn’t deserve to look into them like this. Like she’d drown in those pretty green pools if she gazed into them for too long.

“Toga-san… I made a mistake that day,” Izuku sighed, adjusting and readjusting his gloves.

“A… A mistake?” Himiko could feel her heart stop at that. What did he mean? What was he about to say?

“I… Well, I was desperate… And fighting and distracted,” Izuku explained, doing his best to remember his own feelings that day. The Vestiges in his head had been so loud, it was hard to distinguish his own thoughts from those that the past 7 users had been having at the time.

“And honestly very, very shocked,” Izuku admitted, finally losing interest in his gloves and meeting Himiko’s pale gold eyes again. “I… I’ve never had anyone confess to me before…”

Himiko narrowed her eyes at him. Seconds ticked by as she waited for him to correct himself. Seconds turned to a minute… Then two…

“... what are you talking about,” Himiko finally pressed.

“About fighting? I was-”

“No, not about that,” Himiko interrupted. Was Izuku really this… dense? She’d known him to be incredibly quick-witted and intelligent. Was that… only during a fight?

“No one’s ever confessed to you before,” she pressed, trying to get him to answer a direct question before he misunderstood her again.

“No, never… That was the first and only time in my life,” Izuku confessed, feeling pretty embarrassed by the way the conversation had developed.

“... I don’t believe you,” Himiko said flatly.

“I’m sorry? I promise I’m not lying-”

“No, no… I believe you, I just…” Of course Himiko believed him. She doubted there was anything Izuku could say that she wouldn’t believe. He just exuded such a fair, kind, honest aura about him.

“Never mind… keep talking,” she pressed, trying to get him back on track.

“Well…  I… I told you something because I was unfocused and distracted. I realized… after your trial… I never really got a chance to know you… or ask anything of you… We haven’t really met that often-”

“Four times, actually,” Himiko said quickly. She could remember every conversation she had with Izuku Midoriya except for the one she’d had during the war. She played those conversations in her mind over and over and over again. She clung to them as some of the only bright spots in a fairly unfair life.

“... right,” Izuku mumbled, the discomfort coming back in spades. He genuinely wasn’t used to being the object of someone’s affection. He had no idea how to respond.

“Well… you’d never told me that you’d had feelings for me before-”

“I thought I was being clear,” Himiko mumbled, again, far too embarrassed to look him in the eye again. It felt like he wanted her to be so direct. So forward. Could he really expect her to do something like that? She’d already gathered so much nerve to ask him herself! She’d already done so much against the way these things traditionally happened. Could he really expect her to do everything herself?

“... I’m not very good at this sort of thing,” Izuku sighed, hanging his head in frustration. He kind of felt like a lot of this was his own fault. If only he were better at understanding people and their intentions… “Which is why what I said upset you so much-”

“What did you say,” Himiko pressed. The question had been on her mind for so long. She had to know.

“I said… I said that you shouldn’t want to hurt the people you care about,” Izuku admitted, holding her gaze as he spoke.

“... oh… yeah… that makes sense…” The feelings came back ten-fold. She felt let down all over again. You shouldn’t want to hurt the people you care about. She couldn’t even remember how many times she’d heard that during her life. Usually alongside Why can’t you just be normal? Izuku really was just like her parents. Just like Ochako. Just like-

“I didn’t think… I didn’t realize that… you…” Izuku was still desperately trying to wrangle his thoughts into something coherent. “Your history-”

“I don’t need you pity,” Himiko hissed, biting back tears. That was the last thing she wanted from him. She wanted him to love her the way she loved him. The way he obviously loved Ochako. She didn’t want pity.

“No! No, that’s not it. I don’t pity you, Toga-san,” Izuku said, placing his hand on the table in front of her to get her attention. Himiko’s eyes drifted from his white glove back to his bright emerald gaze. She couldn’t be mad at him for long when he looked at her like that.

“I… just… I wanted to say I’m sorry. For not realizing sooner what that meant to you. Maybe… Maybe we could’ve talked if I’d known? Maybe… we could’ve been friends?”

The dying butterfly fluttered just a little more pathetically in her chest. The most bittersweet flavor filled her mouth at his words. She wanted to cry in anger and frustration and happiness all at once. How could he just… say something like that?

Let alone mean it?

“... I’ve never been someone to believe in the friendzone, but this still kinda hurts to hear, Izuku,” Himiko muttered, rubbing her eyes on the back of her sleeve. Izuku Midoriya was in love with Ochako Uraraka. That much was clear even to people who’d only spent a few moments around the two. He could only ever see Himiko Toga as a friend. But… couldn’t that be nice, at least? Even if it wasn’t exactly what Himiko was desperate for?

“I’m sorry. I’m doing this wrong,” Izuku sighed. He could see he was hurting Himiko by the way she was wiping her tears away. He wasn’t very good at this, but he needed to try to comfort her. And the best way to do that had to be to understand her.

“Can I ask you something,” Izuku asked, gently resting his hand on Himiko’s.

There goes that damn butterfly again. Himiko wished it’d just die already. Her heart seemed to hammer in her chest, and she could hear her pulse in her ears. He was holding her hand! Izuku Midoriya was holding her hand!

“Sure?”

“You told me that for you… Loving someone is the same as becoming them… Why?”

Himiko didn’t think that if anyone else had answered that question that she wouldn’t have just slit their throat. It was just… too loaded. Too frustrating. Why didn’t people understand? Was it really such a hard concept to grasp? With Izuku, at least, she knew the question was genuine. Honest. A sincere attempt at getting to know her.

“... imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, isn’t it,” she asked, pulling her hand away from his grasp. It was a little too overwhelming considering how vulnerable she was being forced to be at the moment.

“I… I love you. I really love you. And Ochako, too. So if I became you… maybe… Maybe you’d love me too?” It was less of a question than a statement. She already knew the answer. Of course Izuku would love her if she were Ochako. He was in love with Ochako.

A few moments passed as Izuku thought about what she’d said. Something didn’t sit right with him about Himiko’s admission. Something that he’d heard before…

“Uraraka-san said something when she was testifying for you,” Izuku started, doing his best to piece together his thoughts.

“I don’t think I understood it at the time, but I think I get it a little more now… Toga-san… Why do you want to become someone else for them to love you? Why not… Why not just be yourself?”

Ochako had said something similar on that podium. It rang in Himiko’s ears every night. It haunted her like a poltergeist she couldn’t get away from. “I don’t understand why she wants to become someone she loves so desperately, when who she is is just as worthy of love…”

Ochako had said it like she’d meant it. Like she’d believed it. Himiko had replayed that moment over and over again in her mind, and not for a moment could she even begin to convince herself that Ochako might’ve been lying. Just like Izuku, she exuded such a kind, caring, compassionate aura that the thought of saying something that wasn’t true was downright impossible.

But… Ochako was wrong. She might not’ve been lying, but she was certainly wrong. And Himiko finally had an answer for that question that’d kept her up at night ever since she’d heard it. And for Izuku now too.

“Because. I’m a freak… I’m not normal.” She forced a smile as she said it, even as tears welled up in her eyes. It was such an obvious answer. It was the albatross that’d been around her neck since she was a child. Her parents knew it. Her teachers new it. Her doctors knew it. The kids at her school knew it. It’d taken her eighteen long years to figure it out, and now, thanks to Tartarus, she was willing to accept it.

“Toga-san, that’s not-”

“I figured it out.” Ochako pushed open the door to the visitor room, a fire burning in her wide, brown eyes. She didn’t seem as tired as she had been when she’d first left the room, but she still looked exhausted. Himiko wished she’d get some sleep.

“They’ve been redacting our letters, Deku-kun. They said the information we were giving her wasn’t safe,” Ochako explained with a huff. Neither of the two could ever remember a time where she looked so frustrated.

“Not safe? We’ve just been talking about school and hero work,” Izuku said inredulously. It didn’t make sense how a letter about how something funny Mina had said that day or how uncomfortable Katsuki had looked when a group of girls had asked to take his picture could be something so dangerous it was worth redacting from a letter!

“Maybe… Maybe we can ask All Might if he can speak to Tsukauchi-san and see if we could pull some strings? Toga-san’s already paying her debt to society, she shouldn’t have to be left without any connections to the outside world,” he said frustratedly.

Himiko had to try her best not to cry again. Ochako and Izuku were fighting so hard for her. They were willing to move mountains if it meant she could get a letter. Where had these kinds of heroes been when she’d needed them most?

“That’s a good idea. We should-”

“Hey, you two. Your time’s up, kids. Toga-jukeisha’s got to get back to her cell.” A guard walked over to the table they’d been using, pointing at the clock on the wall to show the heroes the time.

“I… I guess I used up all of our time,” Ochako mumbled, looking down in frustration. As if she’d had something important she’d wanted to say today and missed her opportunity.

“We… we can talk next week,” Himiko offered. She needed to know that they’d be coming back. That for once someone wouldn’t abandon her. 

“Yeah. And we’ll talk to All Might today and… hopefully our letters can get through to you,” Izuku confirmed. Himiko watched as his hand seemed to reach out for Ochako’s almost without him realizing it. But then it fell back to his side.

Maybe… Maybe they really weren’t dating?

Could they really be so in love with each other and not be dating yet? Was that even possible?

“Iguchi-san’s okay! He’s in the hospital wing! But I think they’re going to send him to solitary when he recovers? That’s all I was able to learn,” Ochako said, trying to get out as much as she could as Himiko was wheeled away.

“One more thing! Did you at least like the manju cookies I sent,” Ochako asked, hoping to get at least one more answer.

“... yea…” Himiko didn’t think telling the truth would change much in this situation. Especially not when the guard pushing her was one of the guards that’d taken a liking to the manju cookies.

“That’s good. I… I hope we can see you again next week,” Ochako said, a bit of energy seeping back into her eyes as the door closed behind Himiko.

“Me too…”

Himiko had gone back to the line to buy herself a bottle of water. She’d gotten pretty thirsty after the most recent translation job had her working on a passage about water filtration. She heard him walking towards her before she saw him, and tried to move away before he reached her. Unfortunately, Tartarus was her own form of hell.

“Oh, well if it isn’t Tartarus Royalty,” Sando said grandly, doing his best to make a big show yet again. Himiko didn’t care to entertain it.

“What do you want, Sando,” she grumbled, grabbing a straw before turning to move back towards her table with Atsuhiro. Kaina and Danjuro weren’t there now- they’d gone… somewhere? Himiko honestly wasn’t sure what those two did when they were alone together. And she wasn’t sure that she wanted to know.

“What do I want? I just want to know how you managed to piss off every guard in this place and the Warden,” Sando said smugly, arms crossed over his chest as if he were having a great time getting under Himiko’s skin.

“Say what you mean or leave me alone, please,” Himiko groaned, not in the mood for boy’s crap.

“You think that people are happy about you bringing Deku and Uravity around all the time? Making them get you favors,” Sando said pointedly. Himko normally wouldn’t have engaged, but the accusation stung like a dulled knife.

“I… I didn’t ask them-”

“Of course you did. You’re pathetic, Toga-san,” Sando said pointedly, grabbing a handle to Himiko’s chair and forcing her to turn to look at him.

“You guilted them and they bent the rules for you. You can’t honestly believe they care about you to do that on their own,” Sando taunted, a big, annoying grin splitting his punchable face.

“Is it so hard for you to believe because you’ve no one to care for you,” Atsuhiro said as he came between them. He had an even larger grin on his lips, more than happy to interrupt Sando from whatever it was he was doing to bother Himiko.

“I’d watch your mouth if I were you, entertainer. Spinner’s not here to protect you, is he? One wrong word and I can make sure Muscular takes your other arm,” Sando threatened, his voice trying to take on a more sinister tone. Himiko just couldn’t take him seriously after being in All For One’s presence just a few months ago.

“Why are you here, Sando? I’d rather gouge my good eye out than listen to you whine any longer,” Himiko grumbled, taking a sip of her water to do her best to show just how uninterested she was in this conversation.

“I’m just here to ask for some help. Get your friends to let us send letters like you’re allowed to, and Muscular and I will be grateful,” Sando explained, leaning on the handle to Himiko’s chair. The demand pissed Himiko off. How had he heard about any of this? It’d been less than twelve hours since Ochako and Izuku had left for the week, how had anyone come to find out about that conversation? Plus, it wasn’t as if the two heroes had even managed to secure their promise that they’d be able to mail things to her safely anyway! They still had to talk to All Might! Who knew what the retired hero would be able to do?

“And if I say no?”

“Then you might get your wish about osing your other eye,” the boy threatened.

“Get out of here. I’m not helping you. No one’s intimidated by you, Sando,” Himiko said, pushing on her wheels as hard as she could to pull her chair out from under Sando’s weight. The boy nearly slipped before he caught himself, his brown eyes glaring daggers at Himiko and Atushiro as they moved away from him.

“No? You should be. Next time I might not be so understanding.”

Chapter Text

Himiko thrashed and bit and kicked and screamed as three guards fought to secure her to the hospital bed. They tugged at the restraints until they were tight enough to bite into her wrists and ankles. She knew they’d leave bruises that’d last at least a few days, but she didn’t care. It’d become a routine that she’d rather die than repeat. Every time she had to do this felt like she was being emotionally, mentally, spiritually eviscerated. And glaring into Dr. Ishida’s eyes provided no comfort at all once the guards had finally decided her restraints were on tight enough.

“That’s enough, guards, thank you,” Dr. Ishida said, waving them away. He always acted so dismissive of them, as if he didn’t understand how much she’d like to plunge one of his own scalpels into his chest if it weren’t for the fact that they were restraining her.

“She’s going to hurt you if you keep being so complacent,” one of the guards warned him, tightening the restraint on Himiko’s ankle one last notch just to prove a point.

“Nonsense, nonsense. Himi-chan was a model patient during our previous session. Please, I’ll call you if I need assistance,” he responded, urging them out the door. The guards cast one last look back at Himiko- as if they were hopeful she’d somehow escape her restraints just so they could have an excuse to hurt her some more- before walking away. Dr. Ishida waited until they were appropriately out of earshot before locking the door behind them. He took a deep breath to prepare himself and began speaking.

“Himi-chan. I hope you had a good week. I have to start off our session today with an apology. I thought I made it clear to the guards last Tuesday that they were to put some extra money in your commissary. It seems they weren’t exactly clear on what I meant by that. I’ll be heading down to the office myself tonight and ensuring you’re compensated appropriately for our last session.” He was obviously trying to get on her good side. Himiko had been thinking about it ever since last week. There must be some reason why he was pretending to be so kind to her. Even though it was a thin veneer of sugar over something so putrid, rancid and rotten. He must be trying to get something from her. But what… Himiko couldn’t be sure. He was already performing these experiments on her at his leisure. What else could a man like Dr. Ishida want from her? Either way, she didn’t care what he had to say. There was nothing this doctor could do for her that she’d care to listen to.

“I also hear that you have friends outside of Tartarus that are sending gifts! And that you’re unfortunately not receiving them as intended.” Himiko glared at him again. She wasn’t sure how he’d know something like that, but she didn’t care to find out. Whatever he knew, he wasn’t going to help her. At least, not without her giving something up to him. She’d rather die.

The man grabbed a small ceramic jar from his countertop and brought it to Himiko. She had no idea what was in it, and she really didn’t care to know-

“Manju cookies?”

Himiko froze, glaring at the man as he showed her the contents of the jar. She could see the flaky, baked dough. She could smell the bean paste, still warm in the center. Had Dr. Ishida made these for her? Every cell in her body wanted to be free of these restraints. She had to hurt him! She had to kill him. To slash and rip and tear until he was bleeding out on the floor. She couldn’t remember ever hating someone as much as she hated this man. How dare he-

“How interesting,” he mused, setting the jar back down on the desk as he spoke to himself.

“I used to have your mother make them and bring them with her to our sessions when you were a child. I’d give them to you as treats whenever you complied with a test or procedure. I thought it’d be beneficial for you to associate something tasty and home-baked with our sessions. It worked well with some of my younger patients. It seems you still have a taste for them.” He spoke wistfully, as if he were nostalgic for those sessions. As if he had fond memories of them.

Sally probably didn’t have any fond memories…

Himiko didn’t answer. She wished she had her knife or a scalpel or anything. She hated the idea that he was getting some kind of twisted, sick satisfaction from this. She hated the idea that something she liked was being associated with what she’d been through at the hands of this man. That anything good had come from those Quirk Counseling sessions. She liked manju cookies because they were tasty! Not because of whatever trick Dr. Ishida had been playing on her as a child.

“Would you like to try to cooperate today,” Dr. Ishida asked, setting a couple of the cookies on the desk so they were within Himiko’s sight, like a reminder of what she’d earn if she complied. Himiko didn’t respond. For what it was worth, the cookies did look delicious. But her hatred for Dr. Ishida was far more principled than her love of manju cookies. At least… a little more principled…

“Today I’m interested in the conditions under which you can use the Quirks of blood you drink,” he explained, reading off his clipboard and flipping through a few pages as he spoke. “I find it incredibly interesting how you’re usually unable to use Quirks from people you have no connection with. But you are able to use the Quirks of those you do share a connection with. Why do you think that is, Himi-chan?”

That was a question that caught her off guard. She’d only managed to use Zero Gravity because she’d been about to die. And when she’d tried to use Double, it hadn’t worked entirely… She’d… never really thought about it. It’d been such a recent development- December 22nd when she’d first used Zero Gravity (not a date she’d ever forget no matter how fuzzy some of her other memories felt). The war had been June 6th. Less than six months to even think about what this new aspect of her Quirk meant. If it even meant anything at all to begin with.

Did she care what Dr. Ishida thought it meant?

“Unfortunately, I didn’t have very many options to pull from for this experiment,” Dr. Ishida explained, a small frown providing barely an ounce of satisfaction to Himiko as she got to see him experience any amount of inconvenience.

“I had the opportunity to reach out to your parents to acquire some of their blood. Certainly you’ve a strong connection with them?”

Himiko’s pulse raced, and she tried to tug at her restraints again. No way. No way. She couldn’t be forced into the body of her parents! That was fr to cruel-

“Of course… I opted against that choice. I’ve no intention of forcing you to shapeshift into your parents,” Dr. Ishida explained quickly, instantly noticing just how distressed Himiko had seemed the moment he’d stated the possibility. “Himi-chan, you must understand, I’ve only ever had your best interest at heart. I understand your relationship with your parents is… I suppose strained is an understatement.”

Himiko took a couple deep breaths to steady herself. She supposed she ought to be grateful for that. Dr. Ishida’s sense of compassion- no matter how lacking she thought it might be- at least stopped him from crossing that severe of a line.

“Only a little bit of child torture,” she thought to herself.

“Another option was Todoroki Touya. I’m surprised there was any blood left in his body after the fight with his brother and father, but much bloodwork was done on him before his eventual passing.”

Himiko narrowed her eyes at Dr. Ishida. Dabi had never let her have any of his blood. She had turned into Spinner and Mr. Compress once or twice during her time with the League. But most of the League members had declined when she’d asked. Big Sis Magne didn’t feel comfortable seeing her own body in that way- understandable. Jin-kun… well, that was just a bad idea. Tomura had given a firm no. Goto had looked like he’d want to use her as a sparring partner if she’d even tried. Asking Haken hadn’t gone well. And Sando… ew. But maybe… maybe… if she could get a drop of Dabi’s blood…

Escaping really wouldn’t be so hard with a Quirk like his…

“I opted against that as well. I thought it might be… unfair of me to force you to shapeshift into a late friend. Doubly so considering how much pain he was in towards the end of his life. It wouldn’t exactly be fair to force you into such a ruined body,” Dr. Ishida sighed, resting his clipboard down on the counter in front of him.

“Iguchi Shuichi is of course another option, however I can’t give you his blood considering he’s currently recovering from his own injuries.” Dr. Ishida crossed his arms over his chest, looking at Himiko like she had the answer to his unasked question.

“Your only two successful Quirk applications have been Uraraka Ochako and Bubaigawara Jin. What an odd pair there. A close friend whose Quirk you couldn’t fully take advantage of, and someone you’ve hardly ever spent very much time around whose Quirk you used quite masterfully. Could the trigger here really be emotional closeness? Surely you couldn’t be close to a hero student like Uraraka-san when you’ve hardly ever talked.” Dr. Ishida was talking out loud again. Trying to answer the question all on his own, but still looking to Himiko as if she’d help him. What was so hard to believe that she was close to Ochako? Why couldn’t she have been close with her? She’d been in love with Ochako, and the hero girl had broken her heart.

What did Dr. Ishida know about romance anyway?

“We’re left with only two options. Sako Atsuhiro and Midoriya Izuku.” Himiko’s heart started to hammer in her chest again. Would Dr. Ishida really let her have a taste of Izuku’s blood again? She’d only had a drop once before. Barely enough to have been transformed longer than a couple of minutes. The thought of being in Izuku’s body again. The cut, lean muscle, the soft freckles and wide eyes.

One For All.

“Realistically, Sako-san’s the only viable option,” Dr. Ishida sighed, producing a vial of blood from his pocket. Himiko’s hopes crashed faster than a jet in a nosedive. Of course he wouldn’t let her have a sip of Izuku’s blood. She felt stupid for even getting her hopes up.

“Have you ever used his Quirk, Himi-chan,” he asked curiously, looking up from his clipboard as he asked her directly.

Himiko didn’t answer, instead clenching her fists even tighter. If she could just get out of these restraints…

“Himi-chan,” Dr. Ishida sighed leaning against the counter in front of him. “Please understand… the more you cooperate the more information on your Quirk I can gather and the faster our session can be over for the day. The less sessions we’d have to have in general! Your Quirk has the potential to save lives, Himi-chan. You could help people, even behind these walls!”

There it was. He wanted to use her. To use her Quirk. This was all about him. It always had been! It really would be so satisfying to tear his throat out with her teeth…

“Alright,” Dr. Ishida sighed after nearly a minute had passed without any answer from Himiko. “Sako-san it is.”

She struggled against him every step of the way. The gag, the Quirk Band, the nonstop talking as he dictated his notes for his voice recorder to hear. Unfortunately, Dr. Ishida was good at his job, and very used to dealing with struggling, unwilling patients. She hated how powerless she felt. How impossible it was to stop what was happening to her. It felt like she was a young child all over again, forced to do whatever this psychopath of a doctor wanted while her mother watched over them. Not once did the woman who was supposed to love her ever try to stop what this monster was doing. No matter how much she screamed or shouted or cried or begged, they were there twice a week every week rain or shine.

“Himi-chan, you’re going to hurt yourself if you continue to struggle like this,” Dr. Ishida sighed, catching his breath after having exerted himself trying to control his thrashing patient. This could all be going so much faster if she’d just calm down.

“You know, I honestly don’t believe I’ve ever done anything to warrant you acting out so vehemently,” he mused before adjusting the Quirk Band on her wrist. He had to do their preliminary checks. Any blood already in her system? No. Any other triggers? No.

Perfect.

“I apologize in advance, I imagine it must be uncomfortable to be forced into the body of a friend. Hopefully we can get this done quickly and get you back in your own body.” Himiko was normally very good at telling when someone was lying, but when it came to this man… She just couldn’t tell. Was his concern fake? Forced? Did it matter? She hated him regardless. There wasn’t anything in the world Dr. Ishida could do that’d make her like him. That’d make her comfortable around this man. She’d make his life hell until her final breath if she could.

“I’ll be using as small of a sample of blood as possible. Again, the less time you’re out of your body the better, wouldn’t you agree?” Himiko bit down on the gag as hard as she could, trying to bite through it so she could bite him next. Unfortunately, his equipment was just as sturdy as it’d always been. She was forced to do nothing but watch through narrowed eyes as he prepared the vial of blood, swirling it around. Himiko would’ve winced if she could move at all in her restraints. She had no idea when the blood had been extracted from her friend, but it clearly wasn’t fresh. It’d likely been in some sort of cold storage for… days? It was probably disgusting. Sure, she’d tasted blood that’d been stored for even longer, but it wasn’t exactly her favorite flavor in the world. Warm, fresh blood? That was what she craved. Not this… frozen tv dinner.

Dr. Ishida poured the few dozen drops of blood from the vial into the gag. It hit her tongue almost instantly, and she was forced to swallow it almost immediately. At least the taste didn’t linger for long. When it was obvious she wasn’t going to use her Quirk on her own, Dr. Ishida sighed again and hit the button. That same uncomfortable, hot, tingling feeling forced its way down her spine. She wanted to barf as she felt her body expel the goo through her pores that normally felt so calming. Now, it only made her skin crawl.

She felt every change her body forced upon her. It wasn’t the usual pleasant, warm buzz that followed with the usual shapeshifting. It was hot, uncomfortable, and squeamish. Her bones stretched and thickened, her muscles grew and shifted. Thankfully, it was over fairly quickly, and she was glaring at Dr. Ishida through Atsuhiro’s tired looking brown eyes within just a couple of seconds.

“Positive response, as expected. I’m handing the patient a small rubber ball,” he explained as he narrated exactly what he was doing. He placed a red rubber ball in Himiko’s right hand. That’s when a thought occurred to her. If she could just touch the table she was tied to, she might be able to use Mr. Compress’ Quirk to-

“Activating the Quirk Band now.” Himiko winced as the spikes drove themselves through her flesh. They were painful and the source of that same uncomfortable, hot sensation she’d been feeling all over her body. But once it’d stopped, she realized she was still holding on to the same rubber ball. Not the small, glassy marbles she’d come to recognize from her friend’s Quirk.

“Negative response? Fascinating. I’m truly at a loss.” Dr. Ishida hit the Quirk Band button one more time, making Himiko wince in pain, but nothing changed. She couldn’t use her friend’s Quirk. But… why not? She… she didn’t exactly love Atsuhiro the way she’d loved Izuku or Ochako or Stain or Jin, but she thought she was close to him. She considered him a friend! One of her only friends. One of her closest… Why couldn’t she use his Quirk?

“Even in failure, knowledge can be gathered,” Dr. Ishida sighed, removing the rubber ball from her hand. “There must be some specific catalyst for that aspect of your Quirk we’re unfamiliar with. Hopefully it doesn’t take another eight years before we find out what it is,” Dr. Ishida said with a small chuckle. He moved to remove Himiko’s gag when a thought occurred to her. Even in failure, we learn new things. The doctor had placed the rubber ball in her right hand. But what she hadn’t noticed was that she couldn’t exactly feel her entire left arm. It was…

Prosthetic?

Mostly.

Himiko took the opportunity the moment it presented itself. The doctor had moved in close and was removing her gag. For just a moment she stopped struggling, letting Dr. Ishida think that she was finally beginning to cooperate.

Perfect

Himiko yanked hard, and what was left of Atsuhiro’s left arm slid from the metal prosthetic. She quickly used the arm to wrap around Dr. Ishida, forcing the man close to her in a desperate hug.

“Himi-chan, let go,” Dr. Ishida shouted, desperately trying to pull himself away. His patient might not have a Quirk to harm him with, but with the strength of a grown man and desperation of a teenage girl, Himiko was more than capable of hurting him. Himiko growled as she sank her teeth into his shoulder, desperately trying to tear a chunk of flesh from him. If she could just-

The punch came so fast she hadn’t even registered it. If she’d been in her own body, she might’ve been able to take it without flinching, but Atsuhiro’s body registered the pain differently from her own. In a way she wasn’t used to. She was forced to let him go, and he quickly pulled far enough away she couldn’t reach him again.

“God dammit,” Dr. Ishida hissed, checking himself out in a mirror he kept by his desk. She watched as he opened up his shirt, revealing the shallow bite marks she’d left in his flesh. He was bleeding, but she hadn’t been able to cause as much damage as she’d wanted to. If only she’d had her own teeth, she would’ve been able to bite and rip and tear until he was-

“You know, Toga-san- not that I’m your therapist or anything,” the man hissed, the usual cheery tone in his voice had completely melted away. This wasn’t the Dr. Ishida she was used to. This… this was different. More raw. It was unsettling.

“But there might be a reason why it’s taken so long for you to realize you can copy the Quirks of those you’re close to, don’t you think? Might it be because it’s impossible for anyone to get close to you? Might it be because you’re so quick to harm the people around you? Young Saito-san? Midoriya and Uraraka-san? Your own parents? Maybe if you weren’t such a mon-” the doctor closed his eyes and took a deep breath, steadying himself before he spoke again. As if he’d been moments away from saying something even worse than what he’d already said.

“The patient can copy prosthetic limbs and the surgical amputations associated with them,” he spoke clearly into his recorder, doing his best to ignore his own frustration.

“Unfortunately Sako-san and Iguchi-san were the only two people I could think of with a positive relationship to Toga-san. I’ve one more experiment cleared for next week. I expect a similar level of resistance with the next experiment.”

The doctor shut off his recorder and grabbed a bottle of peroxide before pouring it onto his wounds. Some gauze and medical tape made it look like the bite had never even happened. He narrowed his eyes at Himiko, took a deep breath, called for the guards and left the room.

Himiko suspected he wouldn’t be so cheerful during their next meeting.

At least she could smile a little more until then.

Himiko borrowed a pencil and a few sheets of paper from Atsuhiro’s cell before quickly making her way back to her own. She was carrying around a couple of empty envelopes and a small shipping box as well. Her heart was racing, and she was fairly excited. It was Wednesday. Wednesday, December 20th. And at the rate her letters were arriving at UA, whatever she’d write would usually get there in about three days. But adding in the weekend and holiday weirdness, she’d do this a bit early to make sure it arrived in time.

Merry Christmas, Izuku-kun and Ochako-chan.

It felt… silly. Writing a letter like this when she’d likely see them on Christmas Day. But… well, there were some things she wasn’t sure she’d be able to work up the nerve to say to them face to face. Especially not after her last conversation with Izuku.

I’ve never written a letter to anyone before. I’m excited that my first one is to you two.

Himiko paused for a few moments and read back what she’d already written. Her handwriting wasn’t as pretty as she’d like it to be no matter how long or how careful she tried to be. She imagined girls who practiced writing every day in a classroom had cute, swirly handwriting that they compared to their friends and probably teased or complimented each other over. She never had that growing up- at least, not for long. Looking at the letters Izuku and Ochako had written to her, she could see the differences immediately. Izuku’s handwriting was neat, but small and scribbly. Like he was trying to pack in as much information as quickly as possible. She could imagine that he was the kind of person who took a ton of notes in class on any tiny detail he thought might be important. Ochako’s handwriting was round and soft, the sharp angles of most of her kanji sanded down, as if she were worried they’d hurt someone. Himiko imagined that everyone would ask for Ochako’s notes if they’d been absent from class that day because they were so easy to read. Himiko kept all of their letters under her pillow, but she was quickly running out of room. The idea of Ochako and Izuku both taking time out of their day to write up a letter and mail it to her made her feel… 

Hopeful.

I’ve read all your letters. I hope you guys are being careful while you’re rebuilding. You both put others before yourselves so much it’s kinda scary. Please make sure to get enough rest. I heard you won’t grow if you neglect that.

Himiko tapped her pencil against her desk. There was so much she wanted to say. So much she wanted to tell them both! But she was nervous. Worried. After her last conversation with Izuku, she wasn’t sure what the right way to talk to them was. She’d been so certain they’d been dating for months- probably since the moment the war was over? But to find out just a couple of days ago that they still weren’t dating… It was so confusing. THEY were so confusing!

She was looking forward to their next meeting- maybe she could ask Ochako what was going on directly? Maybe it’d make more sense coming from a woman- boys were pretty annoyingly dense about these sorts of things. But days in Tartarus seemed to both drag on forever and slip through her fingers and waiting five more might just kill her.

Thank you both for caring about me. The letters make me feel like I’m not trapped here. The guards bring them right to my cell while I’m at work. And the cookies are very tasty.

A lie, of course. She hadn’t gotten the chance to eat a single one since she’d been in Tartarus. But they didn’t need to know that. She’d already burdened them with enough of her problems, the last thing she wanted was for them to get into another confrontation with staff on her behalf. She just liked knowing that they cared enough to even try to send gifts, even if she never received them.

She tapped her pencil against the desk to a different rhythm this time as she tried to think of what to say next. She honestly wasn’t sure what she could say to them. What was even worth writing? Her life was… They didn’t need to know how bad Tartarus was. But… she did have a life before prison. Maybe she could tell them about it? She looked out her window and saw a light dusting of snow on the compound outside. Christmas really was just right around the corner. That reminded her…

I know you guys are probably super busy, but you should go see the Christmas lights in Enoshima! I always made sure to go at least once a year. And I heard most of the area didn’t get too badly damaged during the war. I’d really like it if you two could go and take pictures there for me!

She couldn’t help but giggle a little at that. Sure, she was in love with Ochako and Izuku. But if she couldn’t have them, they should have each other. And maybe if she gave them the idea to go to the Christmas lighting… It was such a romantic place to be. The few times she’d been there, she imagined someone holding her hand and showing her all the beautiful lights and pinning her against a tree and making out with her until her mind went fuzzy and she could hardly breathe…

If Izuku and Ochako hadn’t asked each other out yet, there was no way they’d be able to resist the romantic charm of Himiko’s subtle manipulation and Enoshima’s Christmas lights. Maybe they’d even live out her own fantasy, and she’d get all the credit for them finally getting together.

I hope to see you both soon! Love you!

Himiko read over her letter a couple of times before quickly erasing the last two words. She’d written them down without thinking, but confessing that again… She had to stay focused! Her goal couldn’t be to be with them any more. She was trapped in Tartarus for the rest of her life, and they were so clearly in love with each other. At the very least, her new goal had to be to help them realize their feelings for each other. She folded up the letter and slid it into an envelope. She kept it unsealed though- just in case. Sealing an envelope felt so final! And she still had one more to write.

Happy birthday Ochako!

Ochako’s birthday was in exactly one week. Even though Ochako had never exactly told Himiko when her birthday was, she’d still managed to find and commit the date to memory. She might’ve done a lot of… “research” on Izuku and Ochako when they had first met. Could anyone really blame her?

This is the first birthday we’re friends! The first birthday I’ve been able to wish you a happy one. So soon after Christmas too! I hope you get tons of gifts.

She thought about that for a moment. Ochako and Izuku had been with her during her eighteenth birthday just a couple months ago. She hadn’t even been alive for it. Or… maybe just unconscious? She still wasn’t sure about whatever it was that they were purposefully keeping secret.

“Our super secret weapon that I can’t talk about,” Mei had said. Something to do with her health? Her coming back to life? She’d been thinking about it during the long hours of the night when her sheets felt a little too scratchy to fall asleep quickly. Did they really have the power to just bring someone back from the dead?

Maybe she’d never find out…

At least, she hoped that Izuku and Ochako had been kind to her while she’d been unconscious. Maybe they’d stayed up late watching her sleep? Maybe they’d tried talking to her like they do in the movies? Had they been desperate for whatever they’d been doing to work? Had they stayed up late nights, hoping they could cheat death? She could never be sure, but… they’d given her the best gift of all, even if it’d come a couple months late.

She was alive!

Most people didn’t get to say that after they’d died.

Speaking of gifts, I got you something. I hope you like it.

When she was with the League she’d managed to get Atsuhiro, Magne, and Dabi gifts for their birthdays. Some metal polish in late September for Atsuhiro’s prosthetic, a beauty supplies care package for Big Sis Magne in early October, and some fancy hot chocolate mix for Dabi in mid-January. Sure, she’d stolen them all from big box stores, but they hadn’t exactly been very liquid considering their cash situation at the time. She loved her friends, and they deserved gifts! And she liked giving them. That’s why she was so excited about this letter.

She would’ve loved to have been able to afford gifts for them for Christmas and Ochako’s birthday, but even skipping a meal every day for almost two weeks barely got her enough money for just the one. It’d have to be enough. It wasn’t much, but hopefully Ochako and Izuku would be happy that she was thinking of them too?

I’m sorry I was a little weird with the keychain Izuku got you when we met before. I… wasn’t thinking very clearly that day.

She remembered how excited she’d been when she’d snatched that little All Might keychain. It’d been given to Ochako by Izuku! It even smelled like him a little… She’d been so excited, so desperate to run away with it…

Maybe she’d been more than a little weird?

So I got us matching Ryukyu keychains! I know you work with her agency. She’s a pretty cool hero, I guess. A ton of the guys in here have been caught by her, and that usually means she does a good job doing her job instead of taking all those annoying advertising deals. I hope you like it.

Himiko reached into her drawer and pulled out the little Ryukyu keychains she’d bought at the commissary. They were kept in stock to humiliate the inmates. As a taunting reminder of the hero that probably arrested them in the first place. Himiko was probably one of the first people to ever buy one- let alone two- judging by the shocked look on the prison clerk’s face.

I hope you have a good day on your birthday. I’ve always wanted to go to an aquarium and see the fish there. If it’s not too much trouble, would you mind taking some pictures? You should maybe get Izuku to hold the camera.

Himiko imagined Ochako asking Izuku to go to the aquarium. She imagined how much fun they might have looking at all of the different kinds of fish and weird little sea animals. Urchins and crabs and sea stars… Maybe they’d make out by the jellyfish?

Happy birthday. I hope 17 treats you well. Love you!

She had to erase those last two words again! She felt so silly. The words came so easily!

Normal people didn’t say “I love you” to just anyone.

Himiko took a deep breath, steadied her thoughts, reread her letters and finally sealed both envelopes. She packaged Ochako’s keychain and scribbled the addresses as well as she could. Almost everyone in Japan knew the address to UA by heart anyway.

Only when she was finished did she take off her eyepatch and rub at her eye with the back of her hand. She’d gotten used to the uncomfortable sensation that came with reading with just her one good eye, but she’d never had to write before. It’d given her a bit of a headache.

Oh well.

Whatever secret weapon they had must not be so good if it couldn’t have fixed her eye while bringing her back. The thought made her chuckle, even if she was a little nervous and curious and anxious at the idea that the heroes had some way to potentially bring people back to the dead. Was necromancy legal if heroes did it?

She set the package and letters on her desk and wheeled herself back to her bed. She’d bring them to the mail room first thing in the morning.

First Aid Field Guide.

Himiko flipped through the book, seeing if she could recognize a few words from the text at first glance. So far she’d translated about nine different books, but never something like this. There were a ton of words she didn’t understand. Tourniquet. Compression. Dorsal. Epidermis.

She’d memorized her keyboard. She’d learned the English alphabet in just a couple of weeks. She was even able to understand a few basic words and phrases after looking them up a couple dozen times. But this?

How could she be expected to translate a medical textbook?

“Toga-san? What’s that? First Aid Field Guide? That looks complex, give it here,” Atsuhiro offered, realizing instantly what she’d been given and knowing it was beyond her skill and moving to give her the YA fiction book he’d been translating. No way she’d be able to work on translating this sort of text and get the allotted number of pages in time. Between looking words up and struggling with English grammar, she’d be lucky to get fifteen pages in before the lunch hour.

But after a few weeks of doing this, Himiko had been able to get a good idea of her friend’s own skill at translating. He’d been doing this since Tartarus was rebuilt some time in July. Barely half a year. In that time, he’d been working on story books and autobiographies and even a history book. But never a medical guide. This was out of his league too.

“No. No, it’s okay. I can do this,” Himiko said, opening up to the first page. Thankfully the book wasn’t too large- only about a hundred or so pages. If she missed lunch, then so be it, but she’d get this done without inconveniencing her friend any further. It wasn’t his fault she’d been given this book to translate.

“Toga-san, that’s a very complex book-”

“That I will translate on my own,” she replied firmly. She wasn’t a child. And as grateful as she was to Atsuhiro for making her life in Tartarus easier, she couldn’t expect him to constantly disadvantage himself on her behalf. She’d be here for the rest of her life! She had to take responsibility at some point…

Himiko opened up the book and got to work, refusing to allow Atsuhiro to distract her any longer. The man looked desperately to Kaina, as if he was hoping the older woman would be able to talk some sense into her on his behalf. Instead Kaina only shrugged, mouthed the word stubborn, and got back to her own work. She knew better than anyone what Himiko was feeling- she’d been in the same position herself twenty odd years ago. Except she didn’t have the kinds of friends Himiko had now, and a ton more enemies as a top 30 hero turned prisoner.

Himiko had to use the skills she’d developed over the past couple of weeks, and improve on her own. She’d learned how to quickly search up a new word in the online dictionary, and was just barely beginning to understand the weird backwards grammar rules of the English language. She’d have to make it work.

Thankfully the formatting of the book to make it easier to find important information meant that the pages weren’t packed full of information like some of the other books she’d translated. The first page started out as just a bulleted list.

The American Red Cross CPR guidelines recommend 100 to 120 chest compressions per minute, 30 at a time. Remember these five points:

• Hand position: Two hands centered on the chest

• Body position: Shoulders directly over hands; elbows locked

• Compression depth: At least 2 inches

• Rate of compressions: 100 to 120 per minute

• Allow chest to return to normal position after each compression

120 beats per minute? Himiko tried to think about what that might mean, but there really wasn’t anything to compare it to. She thought about that for a few moments before being met with a list that instantly addressed her questions on the next page.

To help you keep the right rhythm we’ve created a list of 10 songs with the correct tempo to guide your compressions. Remember, the most important step before performing CPR is to call 911. Check out the playlist and be prepared to make a life-saving difference!

70 Songs To Save Lives

“Stayin’ Alive” – Bee Gees

“Dancing Queen” – ABBA

“I Will Survive” – Gloria Gaynor

“MMMBop” – Hanson

“Cecilia” – Simon & Garfunkel

“Sweet Home Alabama” – Lynyrd Skynyrd

“Another One Bites the Dust” – Queen

“Achy Breaky Heart” – Billy Ray Cyrus

“Girls Just Want to Have Fun” – Cyndi Lauper

“Manic Monday” – The Bangles

It was all American music, of course. But one song title did stand out to her. Dancin’ Queen! It was a song she remembered fondly- one that she’d even learned most of the lyrics to as a child even if she hardly understood most of the words. A nostalgic smile tugged at her lips as she thought about how silly it was that one of her favorite childhood songs could be used to help people. She remembered the beat and imagined performing chest compressions to it. At least the information was memorable, even if she wasn’t very likely to use it.

How To Set A Broken Limb. Bug Bites And How To Identify Them! 5 Signs of Hypothermia.

Before she knew it, it was lunch time. Seventeen pages. She hadn’t been able to get in her allotted number of pages. But honestly, she didn’t mind.

“I can buy your lunch again-”

“No! I’m fine. I just want to finish this book, okay,” Himiko insisted, trying to get her friend to understand. She didn’t care that she couldn’t have her lunch. She honestly didn’t mind. She’d been skipping a meal a day for weeks anyway- usually either breakfast or dinner, but she didn’t mind using her one skip of the day on lunch. She wasn’t starving like she’d been on her first day here. Sure, her stomach might start growling before dinner time, but she could power through. Plus skipping a meal was a great way to start saving money. Maybe she could buy some nice furnishings for her own cell? Or even start being able to pay back Atsuhiro for all the stuff he’d given her since she’d first arrived.

The older man looked concerned and worried, but he sighed and gently rested a hand on Himiko’s shoulder. As much as he wanted to protect her, she was her own person.

“Call a guard and tell them to bring you to the cafeteria if you change your mind,” he offered. Himiko nodded once before returning to her work.

How To Stop Someone From Bleeding Out.

Himiko narrowed her eyes as she looked over the section. She might not know most English words at first glance, but she knew what blood meant. She’d recognize that word in almost any language…

Call or your local emergency number if the wound is deep or you're not sure how serious it is. Don't move the injured person except if needed to avoid further injury.

Himiko scoffed at that. Who wouldn’t know to call an emergency line? If someone was injured and bleeding the obvious answer would be to call for help. It’s not like this was some dystopian hellscape and an ambulance cost money or something.

Wouldn’t that be silly?

Before checking for the source of the wound, put on disposable gloves and other personal protective equipment if you have them.

Himiko rolled her eyes at that. Of course, most people would need protective equipment, but that’s what made her different. Blood wasn’t dangerous for her. While most people had good reason to be worried about other people’s blood, to Himiko, it was all delicious… mostly.

Remove any clothing or debris from the wound. Look for the source of the bleeding. There could be more than one injury. Remove any obvious debris but don't try to clean the wound. Don't remove large or deeply embedded objects, and don't probe the wound.

Some of the words were new and difficult, but she could understand what was being said with context. Clothing. Source. Obvious. Debris. She was looking up nearly every other word, but she was understanding what she was typing. Not only that, she was kind of having fun. Just something about the medical field guide was holding her attention more than anything she’d translated so far.

Stop the bleeding. Cover the wound with sterile gauze or a clean cloth. Press on it firmly with the palm of your hand until bleeding stops. But don't press on an eye injury or embedded object. Don't press on a head wound if you suspect a skull fracture.

This part made Himiko a little uncomfortable. She’d gotten so good with her knives, she knew almost exactly how to make a wound that bled as much as possible. But one thing she’d hardly ever let anyone know- she also knew how to stop them from bleeding. She knew exactly how to sew them up. To seal off the delicious blood from the outside world. It was a trick she’d picked up accidentally, learning how to patch up her school uniform when she was living on the street. Flesh wasn’t very much different from fabric in that way…

Himiko sighed and she thought about the dozens of times she’d injured people throughout her life. Stabbing clean through Rock Lock’s hand when the heroes had raided the Shie Hassaikai. Maiming dozens of heroes during the Jaku raid after she’d watched Jin die. Slicing Tsu’s tongue the night of the Vanguard Action Squad invasion. She’d made so many people bleed in her life. It’d been so fun! But…

Would she think that if she weren’t a monster?

She took a deep breath and pushed those thoughts down below the surface. What she might think of herself if she weren’t a monster was irrelevant. She was a monster. She’d accepted that just a few days ago. And she still had more work to do on this passage.

Wrap the wound with a thick bandage or clean cloth and tape. Lift the wound above heart level if possible.

Right. That was why she normally liked stabbing below the chest, below the heart. Those wounds tended to bleed a lot. Or the ones to the face or head. So many hundreds of little blood vessels were working hard there too. Normally in a fight she only had time to make one or two slashes before someone fought back. The more blood she got on the blade of her knife, the longer she’d be able to transform into someone! Even just an extra minute or two bought her tons of time to surprise anyone else she’d have to fight.

Or be someone she loved! If only she’d gotten more than a drop of Izuku’s blood…

Help the injured person lie down. If possible, place the person on a rug or blanket to prevent loss of body heat. Elevate the feet if you notice signs of shock, such as weakness, clammy skin or a rapid pulse. Calmly reassure the injured person.

What would sound reassuring to someone who was bleeding out? You’ll be okay? That sounded kind of silly, didn’t it-

“To be honest, the only thing I don’t want to lose right now is you.”

The thought had slammed into her consciousness like a truck. Except, it didn’t exactly feel like a normal thought. More like… a memory? A spot on her left arm itched. Like she’d been stabbed by the tiniest knife in the world. Or… a needle?

“So I’ll follow my heart. And live my truth.”

Her heart was hammering in her chest. She was scared. Terrified. But determined. All of these emotions were flooding back to her, but she couldn’t remember from where. Why? What was happening-

“I’ll give you my blood. Every last drop.”

She clutched at her chest. It felt hard to breathe. Hard to think. What was happening? When had she ever said something like that? Who had she ever said anything like that to? Why would she ever-

“Let me close up your wounds.”

She remembered the motions perfectly. Just like the patches on her sweater. In and out, up and through and down and through. She was sewing something- someone-

“You know what, Ochako? I think you’re pretty weird.”

Her heart stopped at that. She… hadn’t been able to remember… not clearly. None of the emotions. None of the words. The memories had felt like they’d happened to someone else. Like she’d heard someone else tell a story about something they’d experienced. But now? They all came flooding back. Tears welled up in her eyes and a crushing weight around her chest made it impossible to breathe.

“I’m gonna live my life the way I want to.”

Yes… yes those exact words. She remembered those perfectly. She could remember just how cold she’d felt as she'd said that. Like there was a freezer in her chest that was turning her into an ice cube from the inside out. She shivered and shuddered, her heart hammering in her chest as she remembered watching the flow of blood begin to slow as it ran from her own arm into Ochako’s. She’d given so much blood, her body was fighting for every drop that remained.

But that wouldn’t save Ochako. She had to give it all…

“I’m sorry I stabbed you. And I’m sorry I yelled at you.”

The tears started falling down her face. She couldn’t stop sobbing, but she could hardly even take a breath in to cry out as she did so. She couldn’t make a sound. It felt as if her entire body had seized up on her.

“I’m the girl with the cutest smile in the whole world. A completely normal girl…”

Were those the last thoughts she’d had before she’d… died? All thanks to Ochako? Himiko had been trying to reassure her, but somehow Ochako had been the reassurance. The determination Himiko had needed before making that oh so final decision.

One of her hands went from clutching at her chest to stifling a gasp. She could remember exactly what it’d felt like to fade away. She could remember-

“Toga-san? Are you alright,” Atsuhiro said worriedly, having turned around at just that moment and realized the state Himiko was in.

“Is everything okay,” Kaina asked, leaning in and trying to rest a hand on Himiko’s shoulder.

They wouldn’t understand.

“I… need to go to the bathroom.” She wheeled herself away from her desk as quickly as she could. She needed some water. Some air.

She needed to gather her thoughts…

“How has the manual labor been treating you, Tobita-san,” Atsuhiro asked, doing his best to strike up a conversation. Without Spinner, their little group was down to just four members, but sometimes it was hard to feel like they were all together. Kaina and Danjuro sat with them, but they weren’t really a part of them. They were usually quiet. Reserved. Whispering off on their own about things Himiko honestly couldn’t bring herself to care about. Himiko figured they’d be let out on parole any day now- it made no sense for them to still be in Tartarus after all this time when Tomura would’ve destroyed the heroes without their help in the first place! Still, Kaina at least seemed friendly, and Danjuro reminded her a bit of Kurogiri.

“I don’t mind it at all, Sako-san. I suppose I wish that Quirk use was allowed so I could practice more and get the job done faster, however I can’t exactly complain,” Danjuro explained before taking another sip of his tea.

“That said, the work isn’t for the faint of heart, and I’m rather comfortable with you guys doing your translation work.” Himiko munched on her peach slices as she considered that. Everyone seemed to be warning her against whatever manual labor Tartarus asked of its able-bodied prisoners. Yet… no one seemed to talk about what that labor was. She toyed around with that thought in her mind before Atsuhiro snapped her out of it.

“And Toga-san? You’ve been awfully quiet today as well,” Atsuhiro pointed out. It felt… odd to have someone care so much about her. Not that the League had never cared about her before, but… Atsuhiro felt like an older brother sometimes.

“M’fine,” Himiko said flatly, eating her own rice bowl. She didn’t quite have it in her to pretend she was fine after everything that’d happened this week. And honestly, she was kind of just looking forward to the mentally taxing task of her translation work. It kept her mind off her situation. Off Tartarus. And at the very least, she was learning English at a pretty good pace.

Atsuhiro opened his mouth to speak again before Kaina interrupted him. 

“Is that Imasuji-san,” Kaina hissed, her eyes narrowed as she watched the crowd. She normally spotted things far before anyone else, and she was naturally correct about Muscular. The giant man had gotten up from his seat at a table on the far side of the cafeteria and had been walking towards the group.

“He’s coming straight for us. Toga-san, I think he’s looking at you,” Atsuhiro warned, sitting up straighter in his chair and rolling up the sleeve of his right arm.

Himiko watched as Muscular cleared the rest of the distance towards their table in just a few steps. He didn’t even look at any of her friends, instead training his one eye on her.

“You. Toga. Come with me.” His voice was deep and raspy and full of that same murderous intent he always had. As if the only thing stopping him from killing everyone around him was that it wouldn’t be very much fun.

“Excuse me, Toga-san’s enjoying a meal with us,” Atsuhiro responded, doing his best to get Muscular’s attention off of his friend. Himiko even noticed a quick nod shared between Danjuro and Kaina, with the man quickly pressing his hands against the table, as if he were getting ready to use his Quirk too.

“It’s okay, guys,” Himiko said quickly, resting her hand on Kaina’s shoulder. The last thing she wanted was her friends getting worked up and potentially falling into trouble on her behalf. Besides, she wasn’t afraid of Muscular. He was just a blockheaded moron. That’s why he’d gotten captured so quickly during the Vanguard Action Squad’s first mission.

“Toga-san,” Atsuhiro whispered, quickly grabbing Himiko’s wrist. Again, it was so odd to have someone worry so much about her. She honestly wasn’t very used to it. Himiko gently reached up and ruffled Atsuhiro’s hair.

“I’ll be fine,” she promised before wheeling herself towards Muscular. He led her out of the cafeteria and away from her friends. She knew someone like Kaina might call her foolish for that, but she truly wasn’t worried.

Muscular walked down a couple of hallways until they were near what Himiko knew to be a supply closet. Himiko's mind was racing as he fished in his pocket for a key and unlocked the door. How did Goto have a key? Let alone one to a supply closet? And why would he show her that he had it? With such a small gesture, he’d shown her just how dangerous he really was. He had a connection with the Tartarus guards- of that, Himiko was certain. Connections that weren’t afraid of either of them getting caught. Connections that kept Muscular and his contact safe. She narrowed her eyes at him as he waited for her, but went in anyway. Again, the ex-hero probably would’ve called her foolish or said she had a death wish.

Muscular closed the door behind him before, standing up straighter than he’d been before. The man was pretty tall- 6’6”- but again, Himiko wasn’t intimidated by someone who probably struggled to read at a third grade level no matter how dangerous he was. She waited until he’d cracked his knuckles before finally prompting him.

“I do still want to finish my lunch,” Himiko said, hoping that he’d get the point and hurry up.

“You said no to Mustard?” Thankfully he’d never been the type of guy to mince words. All he cared about was fighting and killing, and if he wasn’t doing either of those things, he was thinking about ways to do those things. How that related to Sando, Himiko wasn’t sure.

“Yes? Is that why you’re bothering me,” Himiko asked with a huff, adjusting the itchy eyepatch she’d been forced to wear at Tartarus. Looking at Muscular made her a little self-conscious about her own bad eye.

“No,” he said flatly, but a small smirk worked at his lips, like he took pleasure in knowing Himiko hadn’t immediately figured out what all of this was about.

“Then what is it? We’re not exactly friends, Imasuji.” She was already getting frustrated. Tired. Exhausted with dealing with this man. It wasn’t any secret that her group wasn’t fond of him and Mustard. They’d only been together as part of the Vanguard Action Squad because they’d had similar goals and Tomura had been there to keep them on task. Now? They were definitely better off not speaking to one another.

“You’re friends with Deku and Uravity.” It wasn’t a question. The words hung in the air like a threat. All things considered, he could very much kill Himiko. He could use his Quirk and do it in a heartbeat. He could likely do it without his Quirk as well. She’d put up a fight, but… 

“Yes. I am,” she answered pointedly. She refused to be afraid or intimidated or bullied by him. She was friends with Izuku and Ochako. At least… she hoped they thought of her as a friend. They probably wouldn’t come by once a week if they didn’t think they were.

“I’m going to kill them.” He said it as if he’d already decided. As if he already had the power to do it. As if it’d be easy. Himiko flinched at the words, betraying her powerlessness in her position with Muscular for the first time since she’d decided to follow him. How could he be so certain? Normally she’d assume he was letting his ego get the better of him, but after seeing him pull out those keys…

“I’m going to hurt them. I’m going to break them. And then, I’m going to kill them. I don’t care if you tell them- I want you to tell them. But I’m going to do it. I’m going to make it slow, painful, and I’m going to enjoy every second of it.” He was finally back to the Muscular Himiko was used to. Hotheaded, worked up, excited. Even just talking about killing like this got him all riled up.

It was pretty gross.

“What the hell is his problem,” Himiko thought to herself.

“Okay? Have fun I guess,” she said with a shrug. As confident as Muscular was that he could kill Izuku and Ochako, he had already tried to kill Izuku. Twice. And he’d failed horrendously both times. He’d failed back during the summer when Izuku was struggling to use his Quirk without hurting himself, and he’d failed just a few months ago even worse when Izuku had basically used him as practice. What made him think he’d be able to hurt the boy that’d taken down Shigaraki? And it wasn’t as if Ochako was easy to hurt either.

Muscular grinned in his cringey, unsettling way and opened the door, letting Himiko out. She made her way back to her friends, not even casting a glance back over her shoulder at the man behind her. She wasn’t interested in whatever grudge he had on Ochako and Izuku. And her rice was getting cold.

Chapter Text

Himiko had to know. She had to find out. What the hell did Muscular think he could do that would hurt Izuku and Ochako? The thought had been on her mind nearly every minute of every day since her conversation with the murderer. He’d said it all with such confidence… Both heroes had some of the most powerful Quirks of their generation. They’d played such enormous parts in the war all on their own. And that was only when they were on their own- they were even more powerful when they were surrounded by their dozens of friends and fellow hero students- they’d taken down Nine without any real heroes around! No way Muscular really thought that he’d be able to harm them…

Right?

She had to find out what his deal was. And thankfully she had just the skills to help.

Sneaking around in a wheelchair wasn’t very easy. The wheels squeaked if she tried to move too quickly, and it wasn’t as if staying out of sight the way she was normally able to during a fight was really an option. At least… not without a lot more practice. Normally that trick she’d picked up worked best in chaotic environments- situations where things were constantly moving, where she could run and jump around and close in on her targets without standing out among a dozen other things that were moving all on their own. Staying in a target’s blindspot just long enough there wouldn’t be enough time for them to react when she closed in for the kill.

But if she didn’t need to close in, maybe there was a chance she could do it somewhere quiet. Somewhere they’d already have their guard down. Somewhere that already had a bunch of conventional hiding spots…

Getting into the men’s bathroom was pretty easy. Atsuhiro didn’t even ask why she needed the blood. Instead, he only warned her about getting caught.

“Quirk use will get you a month in solitary. You do not want to go to solitary, Toga-san,” he’d reminded her, resting a hand on her shoulder as he offered her the tiny vile of blood she’d asked for. She understood why he was so worried for her. She’d heard stories about the way people returned from solitary… changed. Wrong. Whatever happened there, she doubted anyone who hadn’t ended up there wanted to know, and no one who had ever wanted to talk about it. She just hoped Spinner was doing alright.

If only there was some way to check up on him…

For now, she had a mystery to solve, and it was worth risking whatever solitary confinement might have in store for her if it meant keeping Izuku and Ochako safe.

The bathrooms didn’t even have wheelchair accessible stalls. Himiko had to make due with one of the normal ones, but thankfully they were just wide enough to work. With some effort, she was able to sit her wheelchair on the toilet seat so she could hide her wheels from anyone who might take a quick glance down below the doors to make sure they were alone. She’d timed her entry perfectly- having entered the nearest bathroom to the cafeteria just a few minutes before Goto had gotten up from his table himself. She held her breath as she waited, knowing that if anyone even suspected someone else was in the bathroom and opened the door to her stall, she and Atsuhiro were as good as dead.

“We don’t need him.” That was Goto’s raspy growl. His steps echoed in the quiet bathroom, the top of his head visible over the top of the doorframe of the stalls, reminding Himiko just how much of a giant the man was. The realization that he wouldn’t even need to use his Quirk to hurt her made her blood boil.

She might be getting that death sentence after all.

She held her breath, hoping to quiet any sound that might alert the men to her presence. She didn’t move, she hardly even blinked. So many lives were on the line. Izuku’s, Ochako’s, Atsuhiro’s… her own…

“You’re right, but the plan would go much better with him.” The voice that responded to Goto was deep, but more cordial. More level-headed. He didn’t speak like a villain. But there was something… vaguely familiar to his voice. She listened as the man stopped just a couple feet in front of her stall, raising his voice just a bit as Goto walked over to the far end of the bathroom by the urinals.

“We could use Rappa-san as a distraction and set him up to take full responsibility for our escape. He’d put up enough of a fight that the round-up crew would be entirely focused on him during the scuffle. You trust that, don’t you,” the responding voice explained. Clearly whatever plan they were discussing had been considered between them for a long while.

“... I just want to kill that guy,” Goto growled. Himiko couldn’t help herself but roll her eyes. Goto was a murderer, through and through, with no other desires but killing for killing’s sake. It made her sick. She’d at least had reasons for killing most of the people she’d killed. Taking a life had almost always been personal for her. But Goto? He was certainly more of a monster than she was… right?

“And you’ll get your chance, Imasuji-san! You know there’re forums online asking about who would win in a fight between you two. I’m sure you’d love to show them all the answer- we could even take bets and make a load of money on the event- but it must wait for the right time,” the other voice explained. Himiko closed her eyes and racked her mind, desperately trying to put a face to the voice. Who in the world could possibly be talking to Goto like this? Who could be convincing enough to keep that psychopath on a leash long enough for him to be useful? The voice was so familiar, but she just couldn’t place it. As if it were someone she’d heard talk before- maybe even recently, but never cared to listen to.

“Fine. What about the product,” Goto asked. Himiko could hear the man unzip his pants before the sound of splashing echoed through the bathroom. Gross.

“They’re still secure, of course. Although I hate having to be the one to watch them. They’re unnerving,” the voice groaned, a hint of emotion coloring his voice beyond the sleazy, fake-compromising tone he’d been using in an attempt to be persuasive.

“Make sure you can control them. I don’t want that bird thing killing Deku. That’s my kill,” Goto said roughly.

“As the Warden’s explained, they’re all voice activated. They won’t act without a command made by a specific voice, and Sludge copied that UA kid’s voice changer during their encounter in the war. We’ll all be out of here in less than an hour,” the mysterious man said nonchalantly.

Product? Bird thing? Voice activated? Himiko had never seen the USJ Nomu for herself before, but she’d heard about the creature’s bird-like appearance. She knew firsthand just how creepy the genetically engineered weapons were. And she knew exactly how they were tuned to work off a specific person’s voice to take their orders. Did these people have access to the surviving Nomu?

“We’re out of here by next month,” Goto asked. Himiko could hear the sound of a zipper going off, and then Goto walked away from the urinal. … without flushing.

“Sooner. Rappa-san will be released early, and once he’s been out a day or so we’ll strike. The plan works better with him. The guards will have a hard time slipping any Quick-Canceling Cuffs on him after we’ve worked him up with the Ideo Trigger. They’ll be so busy dealing with him they won’t know we’re gone until it’s far too late.” Definitely a plan these two had been working on for a while, but one truth stood out to Himiko more than any other. She couldn’t believe Goto had contributed much to it at all. Trigger? Nomu? Voice changers? No way he’d have been able to think of all of these different variables- the man worked out every muscle but his brain. No, whoever this mysterious person was was clearly the mastermind.

“You have those spare cuffs for me,” Goto asked, his voice more eager than it’d been so far.

“Not yet, the guard needs a little more persuading, but it won’t take long now. He’ll make the drop soon. It won't be too difficult to convince Deku or Uravity to put them on themselves if you kill a couple hostages. Your little plan is crude but workable,” the mysterious man said with a sharp, sleazy laugh. As if he weren’t really laughing at anything funny, just trying to make Goto feel good.

“Perfect. We’re done before Setsubun, then?”

“You’d have probably splashed around in Deku and Uravity’s blood by then,” the mysterious man said, still stroking Goto’s ego.

“That’s what I like to hear.” The two men shared a final grunt before they left the bathroom one at a time- the mystery man first, then Goto about three minutes later. No one would know what they were planning, or how well connected any plan that involved the Warden might be.

The worst part? They hadn’t washed their hands.

“Fuck,” Himiko thought to herself, finally taking a breath she’d been holding for what’d felt like minutes. Everyone she cared about was in trouble.

“I need to talk to you two,” Himiko hissed, wheeling into Danjuro’s cell as quickly as she could. Normally she’d spend her evenings with Atsuhiro in his cell, but she couldn’t waste any more time than she already had. Her friends were in trouble!

“Toga-san?” Both Danjuro and Kaina quickly pulled away from whatever conversation they’d been having, as if they’d been caught doing something they weren’t supposed to have been doing. Himiko didn’t care- they clearly had some kind of connection: an ex-hero turned murderous pariah trying to find redemption, and a failed hero prospect trying to live up to his potential. Whatever reason these two had for pretending like they weren’t talking at least twice a day, Himiko didn’t care to indulge them. This was far more important.

“What’s wrong,” Kaina asked worriedly, maneuvering her wheelchair to give Himiko a little more space between herself and Danjuro.

“Izuku-kun and Ochako-chan are in danger! You two have to help,” Himiko explained, her voice wavering in desperation.

“What are you- What are you talking about,” Kaina asked, already far too confused by Himiko’s words. She couldn’t imagine the absolute force of nature it would take to endanger those two heroes. Especially Izuku- she’d learned first-hand how impossible threatening him was.

“It’s Muscular! And Mustard. And- and someone else! When he wanted to speak yesterday, he showed me he had keys,” Himiko explained, trying to connect the dots. She knew Kaina still spoke to Hawks. And Danjuro clearly had connections with the police. If anyone could help get the word out to Izuku and Ochako, it’d be them.

“Toga-san, quiet with the villain names,” Kaina urged, reminding the younger woman about Tartarus’ policy. The last thing she wanted was for a guard to hear them speaking and come in doling out punishments. 

“Keys? What sort of keys,” Danjuro asked, trying to follow Himiko along with her story. He could tell the young woman was anxious, but he also found it difficult to believe anyone was threatening UA’s most powerful heroes.

“The ones he showed me! They were to a supply closet! He has keys!” Himiko was so anxious she couldn’t help but wave her arms as she spoke, trying to get as much information out to these two as she could. The fact that Muscular had keys obviously meant someone with authority within the prison gave them to him. That would be the red flag leading to the rest of his plan to escape.

“Toga-san, he does janitorial work as his labor compensation. It makes sense he’d have keys to most of the supply closets around the prison,” Kaina explained, her voice pointedly quiet as she tried to remind Himiko of her own volume.

“W- that’s not the important part,” she said quickly. She’d never once noticed Goto doing any janitorial work, but fine, maybe there was an explanation for the keys. There was still much, much more evidence. “Listen, I heard them speaking! They’re partnering with some Sludge Villain-”

“Odei-san,” Danjuro interjected, cocking his head as Himiko brought the man up. He’d had the misfortune of coming across the man once or twice. His Quirk was extremely hard to challenge.

“I don’t care about his name! They used him to copy some hero’s voice changer! I think they’re going to use it to control the Nomu-”

“Toga-san quiet,” Kaina hissed, slamming her hand down on the arm of her wheelchair.

“You can’t discuss those things,” Danjuro explained. Himiko watched confusedly as he reached his hand out, as if he were about to use his Quirk, but she couldn’t imagine why he’d be doing that, and as nothing in the room changed, she quickly tried to continue explaining her story.

“But they-”

“Toga-san, those… things don’t exist any more. Hasn’t Sako-san told you? They were deemed too dangerous and were… liquidated,” Kaina explained, her eyes trained past Himiko’s head to the door of the cell, making sure no one was passing by as they were discussing such dangerous topics. If any of the guards heard them discussing Nomu or escape plans, they’d likely be sent to solitary themselves.

“Also torture for the host bodies,” Danjuro added, sharing a small nod with the older woman, as if they were having their own conversation Himiko wasn’t in on.

“They’re… they’re all gone,” Himiko asked, positive that didn’t make any sense. Sure, Goto and the mysterious voice hadn’t discussed the Nomu by name, but she’d been positive she’d pieced together exactly what they’d been talking about. What other creepy, voice activated, bird-like thing could they have involved in their plan?

“Yes, Toga-san. All of them,” Kaina said sternly, resting a hand on Himiko’s shoulder. She was clearly trying to comfort her, but that only made the younger woman feel worse.

“That… but Muscular said-”

“He’s lying, Toga-san,” Kaina interrupted, doing her best to try to calm Himiko’s nerves. The younger woman had arrived desperate and frantic, and Kaina was just trying her best to get her to settle down before she got herself into trouble. “He was probably just trying to get a rise out of you-”

“They didn’t know I was listening! He’d already threatened me a couple of days ago, he wouldn’t need to give me the details later-”

“You were spying on Imasuji-san? Toga-san, that’s not very wise,” Danjuro said worriedly, his blue, deep-set eyes so expressive as he spoke to her.

“GUYS! Please… you guys have to believe me. They said they were going to use the Nomu-”

“Toga-san, keep it down,” Kaina repeated again, desperately trying to warn the younger woman about the things she was saying.

“WHY DON’T YOU GUYS BELIEVE ME,” Himiko shouted in frustration! As loud as she’d been, she was positive her voice should’ve echoed in the hallway outside, but it’d been strangely muffled as if there’d been a thick closed door in the way. She didn’t have time to think about that though. She didn’t care. Why wouldn’t these two wannabe heroes listen to her when there was a need for heroism to happen! What good were they if they wouldn’t even listen to her to try to help?

“Toga-san, you’re… you’re not making very much sense,” Danjuro sighed, doing his best to still maintain his gentlemanly demeanour while disagreeing with Himiko. “Odei-san’s been restricted to a more secure section of Tartarus for people with Quirks that are more difficult to contain. Last I heard he was in a waterproof bubble and only allowed out under direct supervision for an hour a day. It’s the only way to restrain someone with his sort of anatomy.”

“And those creatures were all destroyed after the war,” Kaina said, her tone leaving no room for doubt or argument. “There weren’t that many of them left to begin with, and the ones that survived the war used to be kept restrained in the high-security cells here in Tartarus, and we all watched as they were removed.”

Himiko was forced to stop and think. Maybe she was wrong about some of her assumptions. Maybe she’d misheard or misunderstood some bits of their plan. But she knew she’d understood the foundation of what Goto and the mysterious coconspirator had been discussing. They were planning to escape. They were planning to hurt Ochako and Izuku! She couldn’t let that happen! If she could just restart…

“Okay, listen, please. I was spying on Muscular. He came into the bathroom with someone else-”

“Who,” Kaina asked, trying to get as much information out of Himiko as she could.

“I don’t know! The voice was familiar but I couldn’t see them-”

“You were in the men’s bathroom,” Danjuro asked with a raised eyebrow.

“After he’d threatened to kill Izuku-kun and Ochako-chan,” Himiko continued, desperate to describe what’d happened as well as she could. “I spied on him and heard him talking. They said they’d be ready to break out as soon as Kendo was out of solitary. They said they’d be able to get Kendo out early with help from the Warden!”

“Himiko,” Kaina hissed, her eyes narrowing as she interrupted the younger woman again. “You cannot go around accusing the Warden of conspiring with convicts.”

“Well he’s going to get away with it if you don’t,” Himiko fired back. “He’d have access to Kendo! He’d have access to- what’s his name, Odei? He’d be able to get out without anyone knowing! They said they had Trigger and were going to use it on Kendo to distract the guards from their escape! He’d even be able to get them the Quirk-Canceling Cuffs they said they were going to use on Izuku-kun and Ochako-chan!”

Danjuro and Kaina glanced at each other, quietly sharing something between themselves that Himiko was starting to really get annoyed she wasn’t in on.

“They said they’d be out before the year is over! That they’d have already killed Izuku-kun and Ochako-chan by Setsubun! They said they’d be able to force them to put the cuffs on themselves if they took hostages. They said they’d be able to rile up Kendo with the Trigger so he’d take the blame while they escaped. They also said they had access to some creepy, voice activated bird thing that I thought was the USJ Nomu. Guys, please. You have to believe me!” There were tears in Himiko’s eyes as she fought to get the last of her words out. Maybe Deku and Uravity were amazing heroes that could move mountains with their Quirks and effort. But they could still be manipulated. They could still be hurt. If anyone knew that much about those two, it was Himiko Toga.

“Toga-san… do you have any evidence of this besides a conversation you heard,” Danjuro asked, his voice soft in an attempt to be kind. Instead, it only served to make Himiko feel like her heart had dropped down out of her chest.

“I… Why can’t that be enough,” Himiko begged, desperate for them to understand. Practically begging them to do something to help. Surely these two wouldn’t want any harm to befall Deku and Uravity. They couldn’t just stand by and do nothing… Could they?

“Do you know how they’re getting their hands on Trigger? Do you know how the Warden is involved in their escape? Do you know how and through which exit they’re planning their escape? Do you have any evidence they’ve even been talking to Odei-san? Do you have any idea how difficult it’d be for even the Warden to make a pair of Quirk-Canceling Cuffs disappear? That technology is incredibly new, only employed here in Tartarus, and heavily monitored.” Kaina was searching Himiko’s golden eyes for any answer. Any idea that she had more to go on than just an overheard conversation.

“I… I don’t…”

“Imasuji-san and Sando-san would be foolish to attack UA,” Danjuro sighed, doing his best to put Himiko’s anxieties at ease. “It’s still the most fortified place in Japan- maybe the world- after the war. Even if Imasuji-san managed to find a way to escape Tartarus, attacking UA would be a one-way ticket right back here.”

“Not to mention freeing Odei-san would be far more work than it’d be worth. And the Nomu are completely off the board. There’s no need to concern yourself about them,” Kaina responded, her eyes flicking between Danjuro and Himiko. There was a tiny trill to her voice that Himiko recognized. The lightest of falters that not many people would’ve picked up on. Kaina was lying! But Himiko couldn’t be sure exactly about what- Odei? The Nomu? And why would she lie about either of those things?

“If you had any evidence at all that Imasuji-san was planning this, we’d at least be able to bring it up to what remains of the Hero Commission, but… just off the word of one person…” Danjuro let the implication hang on its own.

“I… So you two aren’t going to do anything at all,” Himiko asked, her fists clenching in her lap. She was so frustrated. So angry! She’d thought Kaina and Danjuro were beginning to become friends, but… Tomura or Spinner or Magne or Atsuhiro or Jin or Dabi would’ve listened to her! They would’ve believed her! They would’ve moved mountains to make sure they had her back! But instead, these two- the only two people in the world who could’ve done something about what she’d brought to them- didn’t believe her at all.