Archive of Our Own ^beta

Four clown masked heisters entered the bank at Adventure Bay and their de facto leader, Dallas fired a warning shot into the ceiling.

"This is a robbery. Everybody stay the fuck down and no one will get hurt. We're after the bank's money in order to liberate the wealth stolen from the people of this town so stay down, shut up, keep your hands away from your phones, and we'll be out of here in five minutes as long as our fucking drill works." Dallas threatened as Hoxton and Chains ziptied the bank tellers. Wolf came in from the back, killed the sole security guard at this bank and answered his pager. Easiest stealth ever.

Meanwhile in the 2nd floor offices, Mr. Porter was with his grandson Alex and they were setting up a new savings account because Alex made a lot of money at his lemonade stand. After hearing the gunshot, Mr. Porter barricaded the door with the bank office guy's desk and called Ryder.

Ryder answered his Pup Pad and greeted his friend.

"Hi, Mr. Porter." said Ryder with a smile.

"Ryder, I'm at Adventure Bay Bank and it's being robbed. I heard a gunshot and shouting. Please get here fast." whispered Mr. Porter as he hid in the corner with Alex and the bank guy.

Ryder was dumbfounded for a split second. He never had to deal with actual crime during his time as the leader of the Paw Patrol. But he quickly snapped out of it and immediately called the dogs to the Lookout.

"Paw Patrol to the Lookout and get there fast, this is our biggest emergency yet." announced Ryder with urgency.

The pups got to their base within a minute because they were all just playing outside in the backyard and took the elevator up and did that thing where they change the order they line up and their clothes like they do in every episode.

"Paw Patrol reporting for duty, Ryder sir." said Chase the police German Shepard.

"Pups, the bank is being robbed by the Payday Gang." said Ryder.

"What?" "Oh no!" some of the dogs uttered at the same time.

"As you can see, the brief camera footage shows the infamous robber code named 'Dallas'." said Ryder as the security footage showed Dallas shooting down the camera as it lost signal.

"That's terrible. I've heard some nasty things about the Payday Gang." said Chase.

"I know and that's why we have to get them all into custody." replied Ryder.

"Time for a ruff-ruff rescue." said Marshall the firefighter dalmatian.

"Chase. I'll need you to get your pup gun ready incase this goes south. You can't negotiate with these people so you're going to have to use force. Marshall, the Payday Gang is known for using fire as a weapon to incinerate police officers. If they decide to use fire, I need you to quickly extinguish it. Skye. Their most common method for getaway is via helicopter. If they use it, I need you to blast it out of the sky if all else fails and they get away. Zuma. Same thing but that's in the scenario where they use a boat. Rubble. I need you to block all roads in Adventure Bay so they can't get away on foot or with their van. Rocky. I need you to go into the recycling collection and gather materials for chemical weapons if the Payday Gang kills all civilians. I don't care if it's a warcrime, those motherfuckers are going down. PAW PATROL IS ON A MOTHERFUCKING ROLE." ordered Ryder.

"WOOF WOOF WOOF." said all the dogs.

The narrator started singing:

"PAW PATROL, go go go go go go go go, paw patrol, go go go go go go go. Whenever there's a problem around adventure bay, Ryder and his team of pups will always save the day."

"Didn't I tell you to shut the fuck up?" said Chains.

"You're the one in over your heads here, the Paw Patrol will save us." said the guy.

Suddenly a sniper shot Chains and he was downed. Hoxton used Inspire Aced to instantly bring him back up.

"Shit! I didn't see a red laser." said Chains as he inspected his LMG.

"Because there wasn't one. That must mean they called Zeal." said Hoxton.

"AW FUCK!!! DEATH SENTENCE." screamed Wolf.

"Calm down. The drill is almost done and it hasn't jammed yet." and right as Dallas said that, the drill did infact jam. "Fuck."

Chase rappelled down the side of the building and swung into the window with his mouth biting the rope. There were two miniguns attached to his police dog shirt and he took aim at Dallas.

"Yippee kai yay, stupid redneck."

The guns fired but Dallas was running a suit Anarchist build so he used his two seconds of invincibility to get into cover. He then threw a moltov at the dog.

Chase was briefly set on fire but Marshall followed him into the building and put the fire out before Chase could be burned to death. Luckily his police dog shirt protected him from any major burns. Marshall then woofed "Flamethrower" causing his attached water cannon to be replaced with his flamethrower. He set Dallas, Wolf, and Hoxton on fire, causing them to get downed. To deal with Chains, Ryder barged in with akimbo pistols through the front door and shot him many times. But Chains was running a Stoic build so he drank from his flask to nullify the damage while he fired back at Ryder, leaving him barely alive.

"PUT YOUR HANDS UP! KNEEL! CUFFS ON!"

Ryder complied with all three commands and was taken hostage by Chains.

"Now you're gonna work with us, you stupid fucking pig."

Chains persuasion techniques were not resisted and Ryder became a Joker. He then shot at Chase and Marshall.

"RYDER, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" asked Chase, wondering how his leader could betray the Paw Patrol.

Chains then revived Wolf, Dallas, and Hoxton as the drill finished drilling the vault. Each member of the Payday Gang bagged and carried one bundle of gold bars each as they walked out the bank.

"Sorry I have to do this Ryder." Chase then opened fire with his miniguns on Ryder for many long seconds as Jokers for some reason are insanely tanky if you bring the right skills.

"Chase, don't kill him." said Marshall.

"But they used some sort of technique or gadget to make him want to kill us. It's the only way."

"They took *cough* me as their Joker. I have no control over my actions. Those clowns forced me to kill you both." said Ryder.

"NOOOOOOO!!!!" Marshall tackled Chase before Ryder could die but that caused Ryder to shoot Marshall in the head, killing him.

"GRRRRR!!!" Chase was now pissed, not at Ryder but the Payday Gang. He swapped to his rocket launchers and fired them at Ryder, blowing him to pieces with two rocket blasts. "Sorry, Ryder."

Once the gang made it to the beach, they noticed that Twitch the getaway driver was decapitated by Zuma's hovercraft propeller. A few seconds before the gang arrived, Twitch was waiting as Zuma drove up to him and launched a buoy at his neck, then he reeled him in and quickly made a 180 with an unguarded blade, killing the getaway driver.

"Bain, Twitch is dead, a dog on a hovercraft killed him." said Dallas.

Zuma used his mouth to take the pin off of a grenade and then lugged it over to the boat, destroying it.

"And now the boat has been destroyed."

"Aw shit, I'll have Bile get over there in 3 minutes. But first you gotta kill the helicopter dog. Sorry guys, I thought the Paw Patrol would be pushovers." replied Bain.

As Zuma was making his getaway, Hoxton sniped him, blowing his head off. But then Skye flew over them launched a missile towards them, downing all members of the gang except Wolf. Before Skye could fire another missile he only had time to pick up Dallas using Inspire Aced. The duo ran away and Dallas opened fire with his assault rifle trying to hit the back propeller of Skye's helicopter but Hoxton managed to snipe it, causing Skye to go down and blow up. Since Hoxton was running the Messiah skill, he got himself back up and then helped up Chains.

After the gang regrouped at the center of the beach, Rubble was driving a big rig and attempted to run over the Payday Gang. Wolf used his shotgun to pop one of the tires and it caused the truck to lose control and flip on its side. Wolf then ran to the cabin of the truck and blasted Rubble dead. But it was a trap as the truck was rigged to blow but luckily, Bain has figured it out.

"GET AWAY FROM THE TRUCK, GANG!!!"

The four clowns sprinted away from the truck towards City Hall as it exploded and unleashed chemical weapons. But before the gang could make it away from the road, Chase pulled up with his police cruiser and sprayed Agent Orange towards Chains. But thank our lord, Jesus Christ and the Gage Ass Pack that Chains was running suit Stoic so the 5% dodge kicked in and he was unaffected.

"OOH-RAH!!!" said Chains as he found a Gage pack on the sidewalk.

Dallas switched to semi-auto on his gun and tried to kill Chase with accurate shots as he drove away but he missed.

The helicopter arrived in the area in front of city hall but before the gang could enter, Rocky showed up in a last ditch effort to finish the gang for good. He was wearing a full hazmat suit and was about to unleash... eh, who cares? All members of the gang ran into the white circle so the heist was over.

"Aww yeah, back to level 100. I can go up another infamy rank." said Dallas in the heist end screen after all the money and experience was tallied up.

For the card drop, no one got anything good though.