Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Closing his eyes shut, he hears the final shot echo around his ears, banging against every crevice of his brain. Jimmy promised him a good ending, to make it seem like he was the hero in this story. Hero . What a joke, not even taking responsibility for his own actions

Reminds me of someone

Curly takes a deep, agonizing breath through his torn air-ways, before looking around the cryopod. There wasn’t much he could do, having to suffer just sitting here while the air around him slowly freezes, trapping him for a while if anyone even finds him. He chuckles at the thought, like anyone would even care to search for them considering the fact Pony-express let them all go before the crash. Inconsiderate bastards.

Breathing is getting harder, his nostrils burning as he keeps trying to take deep breaths. He thinks about his late crew members, how he wished he was able to do more for them, that he should’ve done more for them. He could have stopped Jimmy, he could have stopped the Tulpar from hitting the meteor if he was just faster. He should’ve taken Anya’s words more seriously, but no he pushed her away, all because Jimmy was his best friend.

What. A. Joke.

He hopes whoever was watching them is having a good laugh at their suffering. That whatever game God made them play was satisfactory enough to end his own suffering. The air around him is freezing now, the last remaining bits of his arms and legs are losing feeling. As he takes his body into account he realizes he can’t feel much left, which might be a blessing in disguise, Curly doesn’t know. He hopes this is fast, prays no one finds him just so he can be with his crew ‘til the end. He didn’t want it to end this way.

As the cryopod almost completely freezes the captains’ body over, a singular oval tear drips down his face, following every hollow and chunk of skin that was torn or burned on impact. As the last of his consciousness slips from his grasp, he feels the singular tear freeze upon his face. He could only produce the one tear, after everything he had witnessed, after everything he had to endure , he could only shed one singular fucking tear.

What.

A.

Cruel.

Joke.

Blood-curdling screams.

That’s the first thing he hears as he comes to. It’s echoing around the room, ringing in his ears, yet all he can do is scream. He doesn’t know why, maybe Anya hasn’t given him his painkillers yet? Or is she looking for Jimmy. Probably for the best, he didn’t want to bother her any more than he had to. He doesn’t understand how she could still look at him with kind, soft eyes after everything Jimmy convinced the crew that he did, forcing his responsibilities upon Curly when he could do nothing to defend himself. Almost like Anya. He didn’t want to think anymore.

His vocal chords ache as the scream tears through his being, shaking his very core. He tries stopping, for Anyas’ sake, he doesn’t want to stress her out anymore, but he can’t stop. Why can’t he stop? He turns to his side, as much as he could without his limbs to assist him, and ends up screaming his voice raw, going until he eventually vomits whatever was last in his stomach. He gags hard, the last bits of vomit fighting to escape his throat until he’s able to swallow it back. He faintly registers there are tears streaming down his face and the dull sounds of voices around him.

Suddenly, he feels someone push him back on to his back, pinning him down to the uncomfortable springs they call a bed. Looking up to his attacker, he sees red . Thrashing around, trying to push the hands holding him down away he starts screaming again, his throat scraping raw as he screams and screams. He feels blood pooling in his mouth as he pushes and pushes, desperately trying to move away from Jimmy the same guy that had attacked his crew is coming for him yet again.

He doesn’t know how this is possible, Jimmy killed himself, why is he back here torturing him again. It doesn’t matter, he needs to- “Get away from me!” Curly sobs out, not realizing he can finally speak again after so long of being forced to be silent. “Get away!”

He feels the hands being pulled away from him as his eyes fall shut, the fight leaving his weak body. He hears scuffling of shoes scraping against the metal floors around the room and a door closing behind them.

He curls around himself, arms wrapping around his frame, feeling like a little kid again searching for the comfort of his mother. For everything to be okay again, to have late nights with Anya, to joke around and entertain Daisuke, to listen to Swasea’s complaints. He just wants it to be normal again. His body shakes as his sobs racks through his body.

He hears the door open again, but instead of the harsh thumping footsteps, he strains to hear the quieter timid ones. Opening his eyes again he glances up and sees sweet Anya coming to take care of him. Again, she’s taking care of you again you’re the fucking captain pull yourself together.  

He sniffles as he makes eye contact with the nurse, and he doesn’t know what she sees in his eyes, but she kneels over him and heaves his body into her embrace. It’s like the water works restart again as sobs resurface from within him and he starts sobbing incoherent words into her coveralls. 

“I’m sorry Anya, I am so fucking sorry .” He cries into her arms over, and over again seeking forgiveness in her eyes,

“Curly, it’s okay. What are you apologizing for?” She softly questions, not quite grasping his apologies as there’s nothing wrong.

Nothing wrong..

Nothing wrong?

He jolts out of her embrace again, looking at his body seeing both arms and legs intact, no bloody bandages covering his gaping wounds, no dirty hospital gown covering his destroyed body. He looks at Anya, seeing her pure face still soft and full of life, no blood covering her chin or spilling from her lifeless eyes. She looks exactly like the night they sat under the projector and talked about the dead pixel haunting the corner of the moon. She looks normal again. Like herself again.

He looks into her eyes, seeing how confused she looked at his state of mind as he was just okay a few hours beforehand. Her hands still rest on his forearms, rubbing soft circles into his skin.

“Are you okay, Captain?” She questions softly, speaking as if he were some cowering animal running from their attacker.

“I-I don't know…” He mutters before heaving out a heavy sigh.

He looks at her, before leaning into her once more. Her arms wrap around him again, moving to press circles into his back instead, quietly humming a quiet tune as he sighs once more.

“I don't know, Anya.” 

Chapter Text

Swirling around his eyelids, he can still faintly hear the screams among his crew, each of them succumbing to their untimely demise from a member they thought they could trust. He feels haunted from his past, their past but how could it be theirs if the rest of them doesn’t even know what had occurred within their walls?

He lays against Anya, savoring the soft beats of her heart against his ear. He missed these moments, when they were alone deep in the night, Anya would curl up next to him for comfort and tell him all about her day, different stories from before the crash, before they even stepped foot onto the Tulpar. When his wounds still burned and scorched his body, he had dealt with it as best he could just so he could hear Anya talk. He didn’t want to make her feel worse than she already did, with him relying on her so deeply.

His bandages hurt…

He’s hurting again.

After a while, he feels someone gently shaking him back to consciousness. Anya separates herself from the Captain to get a good look at him. His breathing is soft but he’s not quite asleep yet. Looking up at the nurse, he sees how concerned she looks at him and yet all he can do is avoid the questions she might have. He pushes himself upright and brushes off his uniform, fixing and pressing down any creases he sees.

“Thank you Anya. I’m sorry for bothering you so late at night.” Curly murmurs, feeling terrible for waking her abruptly.

“It’s okay Curly, you know I have to be ready for anything at any time.” She chuckles weakly, trying to lighten the mood just a bit.

It doesn’t work.

Curly goes back to looking around, avoiding direct eye contact with the woman in front of him, knowing she can sense things even he can’t among the crew. He sniffs one last time, clearing any remaining tears before looking at Anya again, albeit not direct eye contact.

“You can head back to sleep, Love. Thank you for your help.” Curly dismisses the nurse, trying to have time to himself to think about the weird circumstances clouding his mind.

Anya looks around nervously, taking a quick glance at the fluids on the floor before looking back at her captain. Looking closely at him, she can tell he isn’t well. Curly looks paler than he usually does, almost as if he has seen a ghost. He has yet to blink, staring off in the distance like he has skeletons locked in his closet deep inside. He looks scared and confused, she can't just leave him here by himself.

“Respectfully Curly, I will not leave you here alone. Not without someone at least by your side.” Anya states softly, reaching to rest her hand against Curly’s arm.

He flinches at the touch, before sighing in defeat.

“Okay, can we just…leave the room?” He asks quietly, not quite liking the fact he gave in so easily.

Anya nods her agreement, looking at the vomit one last time making a mental note to have one of the boys clean up the mess. She stands, quickly reaching out a hand to steady Curly as he rises. He wobbles for a bit, as if he doesn’t remember how to work his own body, before slowly gaining balance. He hobbles out of his room, Anya following close behind to make sure the Captain didn’t fall at any point. He leads her to the common area, the deep blue light illuminating the area around them. 

He looks at the table occupying the dining space and shivers with disgust and fear, wanting to get as far away from the area as possible. Catching Curly in such a state, Anya reaches over and gently guides him to the couches. Settling down, they both sit in silence for a few looming seconds before the inevitable question pops up.

“Curly…what happened?” Anya mutters, looking at the screen before them.

Curly heaves out his hundredth sigh that night, or at least it feels like his hundredth, and he casts a quick glance at Anya.

“I had a…nightmare.” He covers lamely, “There isn’t any worry anymore, I promise.” He whispers into the cold dead air around the two of them. He glances at the woman next to him, feeling a sense of deja vu as he asks, “You doing okay?”

She looks over again at him, into his eyes and he can feel before he hears the words she utters, “Yeah, can’t sleep. So if you think about it, you really didn’t wake me.” She chuckles weakly.

Suddenly, Curly had the realization that this night was the night they did talk under the screen, this night was two days before the crash. The night Anya confesses what Jimmy did to her. He feels rather than hears himself chuckle as he responds, “I know how that is. I just toss and turn, or stare at the ceiling all night.”

Everything sounds muted around him, he doesn’t register any of the conversation as he knows exactly how this plays out. He died in the cryopod, he had to, otherwise this whole situation wouldn’t make sense. Did that same God not have enough fun messing with him? With his crew? Were they making them all suffer again? Or could he change their fate? He had to, he had to change how he did things for the nurse in front of him, talking about the dead pixel in the corner of the screen, for the intern that looks up to him as captain, for his engineer taking the burden of everything that surrounds them on the Tulpar. He has to change their outcome for his crew and he will not rest until they are safe.

They have to be safe.

Tuning back into the conversation, he notices Anya looking at the night sky again.

“Hey,” she turns to look at him again, “Why do you think Pony Express put a lock on the medical room door but not in the sleeping quarters?”

He looks into her eyes, deep within she is tired, he can see it in the creases along her face, in the way she’s not quite looking into his eyes. How did he not notice this? The signs were right in front of him but he chose to ignore his hurting nurse for his best friend - ex-best friend? Traitor sounds better..but does he believe it even now? - and he will not do it again.

“Hmm…I suppose for the same reason they put a lock on the cockpit, for safety .”

He promises quietly that he will do anything he could this time around to keep his crew safe .

They sat there for a while, both watching the moonlight screen. Curly was desperately trying to find the dead pixel haunting the corner of the screen, like it could be the solution to his problems. He has two days, two days , to prevent anything bad happening to his crew.

Two days before the crash

…And he has to make every second count.

Chapter Text

It was getting harder to act normal. He had to figure this out, how he was able to rewind time to save his crew. If it was even him who rewinded time or if there truly was some kind of deity looking over their shoulders and pulling the strings to their game. He has to find some kind of answers.

He looks over at the woman next to him, notices as she is struggling to keep her head upright. He lets out a heavy sigh before pushing himself up with unsteady limbs. His body doesn’t feel like his own anymore.

“Let's get you to sleep, Anya.” He states quietly, the time of night settling deep into his bones.

“I’m okay, Curly.” She tries waving away his helping hand, before bringing the same hand to try, and fails, to cover up her deep yawn. “I can get to bed myself.”

Curly chuckles as she gets up from the couch, “I don’t doubt it, but like you had accompanied me here, let me bring you over. For my sake, please Anya.” Curly insists, but he doesn’t want to over step.

She looks up at Curly, seeing in his eyes that he’s still wary about something deep in his mind. Pondering for a moment on whether she should or not, she heaves out a quiet breath before agreeing. Curly smiles a little, and goes to lead the way.

It’s silent around the ship, the quiet mechanical whirring of engines and gears echo along the hallway. The near silent thumps of Anya’s shoes follow behind his more heavy ones as he leads her through the long winding hallways. As they pass each room, they can hear various different sounds coming through the thin doors. The only quiet room they pass is Daisuke’s.

Finally reaching Anya’s, Curly steps to the side and motions to her.

“Your room, Miss.” Curly says in an over dramatic way, going as far to bow a little.

He hears Anya stifle a chuckle as he looks up through his bangs, covering the mischievous gleam in his eyes.

“Why, thank you, good sir.” Anya follows suit, doing a small curtsy as she reaches to open her door.

Curly lets out one last chuckle..

“...Anya?”

She looks back to his eyes, gleaming happiness just a moment before, now dull with unspoken words.

“Yes, Curly?”

There’s a beat of silence, the air turning a little darker between the two souls.

“I won’t let him hurt you again.”

…

“Thank you, Curly.”

…

The door shuts with a thud , hiding the single tear that had escaped her control.

Curly straightens ups, brushing off his coveralls before heading back to his room for the night. He’s deep in thought, again wondering how this is even happening. What spell were they under that they’re alive again? Did he even die? Or is he in that deep comatose state and he’s dreaming of everything that’s happening right now? He doesn’t know and it scares him.

He wasn’t paying attention as he walked in his room and bumped into someone. Jumping a little, he plasters a smile on his face and goes to address the person.

“Hey, sorry I wasn’t paying attention. Do you need-” He was chuckling at his own actions before looking up and meeting the eyes of the intruder.

“Are you doing okay now?” Jimmy asks, standing in the doorway of his room, walking out like he owned the place, like he didn’t just step foot into his sacred place.

Was this how Anya felt?

Jimmy stared at him, waiting for a response as Curly just sat there, his eyes devoid of emotions.

“I’m fine, Anya took care of it.” He mumbled, not giving any additional information.

“Can you leave, please?”

Jimmy looked a little surprised that his best friend was shutting him away.

“Curly, I want to talk with you. What’s on your mind? Why were you screaming at me to get away? I want answers.” Jimmy turned insistent, turning his gaze to track Curly’s movements. Curly brushed past Jimmy into his room, taking a quick glance to make sure nothing was out of place and noticed his… mess was cleaned.

“I don’t want to talk right now, Jim. Please leave.” Curly dismissed, looking everywhere but at Jimmy.

“Curly, what happ-”

“Jimmy, you are dismissed!” Curly commanded, pulling out his captain card.

Jimmy jolted, taken aback as Curly has never once used that tone against him. They always spoke to each other as equals, with Curly being the captain and Jimmy the co-pilot, they were equals. Why is he talking down to him now?

“...Okay, Captain.” Jimmy said the title with disdain before moving to leave the room.

Curly casts one last glance at the man before looking away.

He could only listen as the faint footsteps left his ears.

He can’t move, why can’t he move anymore? What’s happening?

He tries to call out for anyone , why isn’t anyone answering him? What is happening ? He cries and calls, all that will spill out of his mouth are mumbles, he can’t quite pronounce his words anymore, they won’t string together like they should.

Where is everyone?

He finally takes in his surroundings. He’s back in the medbay, bandages strewn around the room like someone was looking for something important. He looks at his state and finally realizes how much pain he is in.

Screams erupt from his mouth again, as his eyes fight to shed tears over his circumstances. His body is deformed, he doesn’t remember anything, why did he look like this…this abomination ? His legs and arms are cut from his body, nubs covered in bandages, each limb cut uneven from each other like there was a rush to amputate whatever his attacker could reach. Why does he look like this?

What happened?

He doesn’t remember anything, the last thing being Anya revealing she had broken the news about her unwanted pregnancy and Jimmy storming away to some place unknown to anyone on the ship. He remembers red lights flashing around the ship and running to the cockpit, but after that? He doesn’t know .

All he hears are his screams, bouncing off the walls and back to him like they are taunting him of his current state. He squirms around the gurney, pain erupting from his movement, but he can’t stop. What had happened to him?

He feels his own blood start oozing out of various wounds around his back, bleeding into the sheets below him and staining anything it could reach. He feels whatever nerves he has left shoot electricity after electricity of pain into his system and that’s all he can focus on anymore.

All he can focus on.

The world goes black as an unknown figure looms over him, wet droplets falling on to his body as all he can hear is muffled apologies being sent his way.

Chapter Text

Curly wakes with a jump, shooting up from his cot before looking around his surroundings. He had almost thought, once he fell asleep he would be back in the cryopod, back surrounded by his dead crew. Back to being the only one alive . Was he even alive? Or was he just living? He’s not sure, he didn’t feel alive. He still doesn’t feel real right now.

A dream wraps around his mind, as he remembers it suddenly. Back to what he looked like before, back from the beginning of the crash, when his body was in agony everyday, where he had not a drop of respect, where he had to rely on anyone just to take care of him, the time he was most vulnerable to everyone around him… and he was the only one left behind.

…He needs to move on.

Moving out of bed, he quickly takes account of his body. All four limbs, check, still have skin, check, luscious hair…check . He chuckles a little at his own thoughts before brushing said ‘luscious’ hair with his fingers, wanting to look a little presentable when he walks out to his crew. They’re gonna have questions . He doesn’t know how he’s going to answer them.

He looks around once more, making sure to leave nothing behind before heading out to the lounge where he can hear the others.

Upon entering the place, he can quickly hear Daisuke nagging Swansea about something, Anya is sitting on the couches in the corner, and… He’s by the counter. Curly goes to Anya first.

She’s looking down at some medical book when he approaches her.

“Hey, Anya.” Curly smiles at her, taking a seat next to the Nurse as she sets her book down to the side.

“Hey Curly.” She smiles politely, “Did you sleep well?”

Curly huffs out a small laugh,

“Well enough…” The wisps of his dream still haunt the edges of his mind, the constant reminder that he has to do better for his crew this time around. 

Anya notices the distant look that clouds her Captain's mind, but she knows that moment of vulnerability was not for her to breach. Not after the events from last night.

A small silence embraces the two of them, each in their own states of mind, both broken in different ways.

“Captain?” Anya mumbles hesitantly, her question weighing heavy in her mind.

“Yes love?” Curly asks delicately, sensing her own moment of vulnerability.

She’s silent again, running circles in her own thoughts. He tries remembering what happened the day before the crash, the last conversation he had with his nurse. As he’s racking his brain trying to remember, he hears her take a sharp intake of breath, before she mumbles a quick “Nevermind.” and stands abruptly. Shocked at her sudden movements, all he can do is watch her scurry away as he looks at the reason she ran.

He makes direct contact with the man before him, his ragged facial features intruding into Curly’s space.

“Jimmy.” Curly says curtly, giving a small nod as he braces himself for his questions.

“Are you done running from me like a bitch?” Jimmy spits at him, like venom coated his tongue and he was merely spreading it to the closest person next to him.

Curly takes a deep breath, counting one, two, three before releasing.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Jim.”

“Cut the shit, you know exactly what I’m talking about.” Jimmy butted in, not letting Curly respond to anything.

“Since last night you won’t even look me in the eyes. What are you doing, man? Every day for the last coupl’a months you would come speak to me about anything, now first thing in the morning you’re coming over to talk to Anya?” He spits her name like it was just dirt under his shoes.

“Just a couple of days ago you wouldn’t even pay attention to that- that whore unless you needed her to grab something for you. Unless you needed some typa medical attention and even then it was just a loada shit just so she can act like she’s doing something important to the rest of the crew.” He sneers at him.

Curly averts his gaze again, not giving Jimmy the satisfaction of even looking in his eyes. He looks around the room, trying to find an escape, noticing none of his other crew members were in the room with them. Good he doesn’t need them to witness this either.

Tuning back in, he cuts Jimmy off abruptly, “Jimmy as your superior you need to stand down and listen to me .” Curly commands. HIs rage, from his past mistakes and ignorance steps forward into the light as he stands his ground against Jimmy.

“For too long I’ve been letting you get away with things I shouldn’t have, turned a blind eye when you toed the line of insubordination. You talk down the rest of the crew to be fearful of you, you talk down Anya with no valid reasons, just because you can! I don’t have any obligation to tell you what’s going on in my head, that is not your job!” Heavy breathing comes from the Captain as the ship settles into silence, the whole galaxy turns quiet as if it were leaning in with bated breath awaiting Jimmy’s answer.

The two men stare into eachothers eyes, trying to intimidate the other to stand down. A moment, two, passes by before one averts his eyes.

“If that’s what you really think, then so be it Captain. ” Jimmy hisses, before turning away and leaving the lounge.

Curly releases the breath he was holding, this wasn’t how the day started in his past life. The day before the crash, they were all laughing without a care in the world, the only bump in the road being when Anya…hid…

A sharp gasp escapes Curly.

The gun .

Chapter Text

Curly doesn’t remember where she put it.

He ran to the medical room, tearing apart the room, desperately trying to remember where she hid it. The last time she had it, she tried figuring out the code, pleading - begging - Curly to tell her the numbers. In the end, she drank the mouthwash and took a handful of his painkillers..

He couldn’t help her then, but he has to try now.

He bursts out the doors of the room, slamming into one of the walls as he sprints to the cockpit. Where was it? Where was it, where was it-

The door opens, time slowing down as it reveals the woman kneeling besides his seat, her arms cradling her stomach. He rushes towards her, moving to kneel in front of her before reaching out. The nurse flinches heavily before he can make contact, causing him to retract his prior movements.

“For fuck’s sake! Where is it?” His mouth moves automatically, the same feeling of deja vu encompasses him like it did the night they chatted in front of the moonlit screen. He knows how this conversation goes, recited it word by word when all he could do was lay in the damn cot, writhing in pain. The day she told him she was pregnant. The day he promised he would take care of it.

But he didn’t do shit . 

He distinctly hears himself say to the hurting woman before him that she never got her own psych evals, that she should have come to him if she was feeling stressed. He remembers the words that stalled his heart for a beat or two as it falls from her mouth again ,

“What would you have done?”

He couldn’t stop the words that fell from his mouth.

“Anything.” He makes brief eye contact with his nurse, “ Anything. ” he had promised.

“You, the crew, are all my responsibility. I told you so over and over, yeah?” He uttered, giving reassurance to her.

Anya looks up again, before looking down at her stomach, “I’m not going to hurt myself. You know the gun is in a safety case I can’t open.” She says, her arms tightening around herself, “But I hid the case itself.”

He feels himself about to respond before he pauses. He looks at the woman before him, how she’s hurting, she’s scared. He can only imagine how it feels to be the only woman surrounded by men. How she has no one but herself to look out for her, how she needs to rely on her male captain for support and he has failed her. He needs to make it right this time, for her, for his crew.

She notices his pause, glancing up to her captain as she sees his gaze fall to her arms.

“You’re pregnant.”

A sharp intake of breath is the only sound that engulfs the cockpit, everything else falling silent as the two stare at each other.

The only thing she can do is stare at him with her sad oval eyes, tears welling up as everything comes crashing down around her. She nods once, twice, before tear after tear is spilling out for only the two of them to witness.

He reaches out once again, and this time she crashes into his arms, hands clutching her captain's coveralls as all she can do is cry. The scene is reminiscent of the night he woke up screaming, clutching onto her like she was his lifeline, and in a way she was .

He rubs her back, letting Anya let out all that she needs to, promising silently to be there to support her fully this time. To take responsibility for the man that hurt her. Through his stewing, he can hear her weakly ask, “How did you know?”

“You’re my nurse, there was no one around to take care of you, to protect you. You’re scared and I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything to help you, to make you feel safe on this ship. I’m sorry it came down to this, Love.” Curly answers, slightly avoiding the question as it weighs heavy in his chest.

The two lay there as a fragile silence settles over them, like a blanket trying to contain the warmth from the moment.

“The gun is in the compartment under the cot.” She whispers to him, like it’s a secret only the two can share. He nods before uttering,

“...I will fix this.”

The last of the tension in the woman’s body bleeds out from her, the rest of her weight crashing into him.

“Thank you, Curly.”

After the nurse collected herself, Curly and Anya made their way back to the lounge, both leaning on the other to keep themselves upright. As they entered the door, they saw the rest of the crew sitting around the table.

“Took you long enough.” Swansea’s gruff voice cuts off any remaining conversation the others were engaging in.

“Hey, Captain!” Daisuke grins, waving enthusiastically, “We were just wondering where you and Anya-” Daisuke looked between the two of them. Anya’s face was still flushed with tears, her eyes slightly puffy as she rubbed her face, while Curly’s coveralls were slightly damp from said tears.

“Oh my god, Anya are you okay?” Daisuke immediately gets up, rushing to the woman checking over her, “What happened?”

Anya looks at Curly before looking at the younger man before her, “Nothing Daisuke, just not feeling the best right now.” She tried to smile reassuringly.

They hear a scoff coming from the dining table, Jimmy with his arm crossed watching the scene unfold in front of him. “There’s no way you guys are falling for the ‘I’m just so sad’ act, she’s fine, and if she isn’t then I guess she’s gonna have to suck it up.”

Curly feels Anya lean more into him, trying to hide behind his figure. His hands start shaking as he tries to keep himself level headed, not wanting to blow his head in front of his crew.

“Jimmy, how many times do I need to tell you to stand the fuck down!” Curly raises his voice, his gaze unblinking as he stares Jimmy down.

The room falls quiet, everyone watching the two pilots, awaiting the next move. It’s silent enough to hear a pin drop, silent enough to hear the whirring mechanisms of the ship around them. It feels crushing, it is deafening .

Jimmy suddenly pushes himself up, marching his way to Curly. Immediately, Curly moves Anya to Daisuke, ushering the two of them behind him again as he moves to meet Jimmy in the middle.

“And what the fuck are you going to do about it if I don’t?” Jimmy taunts, shoving his index finger into Curly’s chest.

“How about you fuck around and find out.” Curly replies.

The two stand toe to toe, the air thick around them as their unsteady breathing fills the space between them. Jimmy moves first, shoving Curly to the floor as he quickly gets on top of him. He’s hitting, punching , the man under him. His anger and jealousy spills out in every punch he lands. Arms raised in front of him to protect what he can, Curly struggles to get leverage against the man pinning him down.

“How does it FUCKING feel, Captain?” Jimmy yells, “How does it feel to be the one beaten by life’s bad choices? Cause every fucking time I’m around you this is how it feels!”

Curly manages to grab one of his punches, halting to movement before it could land. Quickly, while Jimmy is stunned, He lifts his hips to unbalance the man on him. Jimmy sways to the side, unguarded as Curly slams his fist into his rib. Curling over himself, Curly’s able to shove the man off completely. Moving swiftly, he stands and looks at the other members.

Anya was cowering against Daisuke, the boy’s arms wrapped around her to comfort the woman from the scene as silent tears ran from her eyes again. Looking at the older man, he sees Swansea had moved from sitting to standing, eyes catching Curly’s line of sight.

Before Curly can say anything to reassure his crew, Jimmy is standing in front of him again. The man charges toward the Captain, trying to wrestle him down again. Instead of taking the man down, Curly was able to grapple the man running towards him. He lifts him over his shoulder, throwing him like he was a sack of potatoes. Jimmy starts thrashing against the man, pounding his fists against his back.

“Jimmy, calm the fuck down.” Curly grunts, moving to the couches. “Daisuke, get-” he huffs in pain, “Get Anya to medical.”

He sees the boy nod at the direction he was given, ushering Anya out from the lounge and into the safety of the medical room.

Making it to the couches, he throws Jimmy down, pinning him to the couch as he yells “Swansea, grab the rope from my locker!” He hears the man quickly leave the room.

Jimmy is still moving around, desperately trying to gain the upper hand again. Curly leans down to Jimmy’s ear, breath curling around as he says, “I know what you did to her , I know what you would do if I don’t take responsibility right now, I KNOW what you truly think of me.”

Jimmy slowly stops struggling, the words settling in his head. He looks at Curly, his gaze unfriendly, as he starts hysterically laughing. “I should have KNOWN !” He cackles, “I should have known that BITCH would go opening her fucking mouth!” He yells.

His words reverberate around the room as everything settles. His laughter goes on longer and longer before all the fight leaves his body. He slumps into the couch, arms pinned behind his back with the Captain kneeling on him. His knees press heavily into his spine, any movement uncomfortable as the result causes the sharp pain to dig deeper into him. His laughter trails off, before they’re encompassed with silence again.

Curly feels the man below him take a deep breath, “You know, I’ve always envied you.” He chuckles, “The oh so great Captain, everybody talks so highly of you like you know what you’re doing. When in reality we both know you don’t .” He whispers, a secret shared between the two of them.

“You don’t know what you’re doing, but you can’t let your little facade fall even a little bit in case you cause havoc in the ship.” Jimmy spits, his eye straining to make eye contact with his superior. “I don’t know how you can handle all this control, all the responsibilities piled on your shoulders.”

Curly looks down at the man, sees all the fight leave his eyes, the regret slowly pooling in after it. All he sees is a broken man who doesn’t think he has a future, so he ruined it before he even had the chance to embrace it.

Curly sighs.

Is this the right thing to do?

He stays perched on top of the man, waiting for his mechanic to return with the rope.

…this has to be the right thing.

Otherwise, he doesn’t know what else he could do to change their fate.