Chapter Text
Jamie stood dumbfounded as Claire twirled freely back towards the throng of the dance floor, her curvaceous hips swaying seductively to the beat of the music and her curls bouncing back and forth as if in tune.
His head was whirling. The silly besom thinks I am with Laoghaire. How on earth could she ever think that? His brows creased in confusion, and he absent mindedly scraped his hand across his chin, deep in thought.
Now that he thought of it, Laoghaire has been like a limpet since Claire had arrived back in Scotland. If he was being totally honest with himself, she was a constant even before Claire arrived, she would hang around him like an overpowering smell. Upon reflection, she seemed to be everywhere he was. The realization hit him that it was a very fair assumption for Claire to make, he huffed deeply in frustration, what a blind idiot he had been. However, he still had no idea if that was why she suddenly went cold on him all those years ago. Well at least one thing was clear, there was one thing he could put Claire straight on. He straightened his shoulders and took a deep breath, no time like the present and he had to act before it was too late.
He skirted around the side of the dance floor frantically searching for her, he laughed to himself as the sound of boots thundering on the wooden floor almost drowned out the band. He observed the joyful chaos, a vibrant sea of clan tartans, couples with hands clasped, breathless, pink cheeked and eyes wide with happiness despite being thrown around like rag dolls.
He eventually came across Ellen and Nettie, who had downed more whisky than they ought to on an empty stomach. The pair of them were propped up at the bar giggling and snickering like naughty schoolgirls. It warmed Jamie’s heart to see his mother happy, it was time for him to be happy too, and he felt lighter than he had in months, but first he had to find Claire.
“Ma, have you seen Claire?” he asked in earnest.
Ellen immediately tried to appear more sober than she was, by trying to straighten herself up but failing drastically.
“No shon I have not. Nettie, have you seen Claire?” She slurred and glanced at her friend.
Nettie made no attempt to hide her drunken state. “Oh aye, I saw her running out the back with my Gordon. What a beautiful couple they make.” Nettie was giddy with joy.
Jamie looked crestfallen and his mother’s heart ached for him. “Come on shon, let’s have a wee dram.” She took hold of his arm and motioned him to the bar.
“You’re okay Ma, I think I will call it a night. You two enjoy yourself.” Jamie gave her a fake smile, but he felt undeterred.
As he walked away, Ellen turned to Nettie.
“You don’t think this has backfired and Claire and Gordon are developing feelings for each other do you Nettie?” asked Ellen with a concerned look on her face.
Nettie guffawed loudly “What? Ellen, we don’t call him gay Gordon for nothing!! He would be more interested in Jamie than Claire!”
Ellen shrieked with joy and clinked her glass against Nettie’s. “Oh, I am verra glad to hear that, Nettie!”
Jamie decided to look outside, the air was nippy, and it felt damp, the smell of woodsmoke was lingering in the air. It felt invigorating so he filled his lungs with it in appreciation. His mind was clearer than it had been in months, and he was filled with quiet determination. The grounds were lit by moonlight and a couple of spotlights which had been brought in especially for the occasion so that revellers would not lose their way on the path and end up in the bushes, as had happened in previous years.
To the side, Jamie spotted a loan figure sitting on a bench and instinctively he knew it was Claire. He took off his thick jacket and walked over to her, gently draping the jacket over her shoulders.
“You will catch your death of cold Sassenach.” He chided her.
“Oh, I am made of tough stuff, don’t worry about me.” She moved over ask she spoke in a silent invitation to join her.
“Have you had a nice night Sassenach?”
“Yes, I suppose so.” She admitted.
“Can I ask you a question?” He probed; it was now or never.
“Of course, you don’t have to ask permission.” She looked at him quizzically smiling.
“What gave you the impression that I was with Laoghaire? I am not and I never have been.”
Claire’s eyes flew open in surprise. “What?”
“Nope. Never have been and never will.” He turned fully to face her.
“Whatever gave you the notion Claire?”
Claire dropped her head into her hands.
“Stupid, stupid, stupid. Oh for fucks sake Claire!” She started thumping the heel of her hand into her forehead.
Jamie gently took hold of her hand and gently placed it on his knee.
“Sassanach, stop it, you’ll do some damage to that pretty face of yours. Now, tell me where you got the notion that I was seeing Laoghaire.”
She looked up at him, her large amber eyes were swimming with tears.
“Uncle Lamb.” She whispered.
“Uncle Lamb? What in gods earth did the man say?”
“He said that just after I left, you sat with him and told him that you were in love. That it was like a bolt from the blue. He said that she was the one for you. He fully expected you to say it was me but then Laoghaire walked over as you were talking to him, and you gazed at her as if she had hung the moon. Uncle Lamb said it was undeniable.”
Despite the cold autumnal air, Jamie felt hot. “What!!! I was talking about you Sassenach, I was about to ask for his permission to formally court you when he stood up and walked away. I don’t even recall Laoghaire being there because I believe I was only thinking about you, no-one else, I give you my word.”
Jamie took a deep breath to compose himself.
“And this is why you cut me off? Because you thought I was in love with her? Christ Claire, how could you think so little of me? How could you even contemplate that I would do such a thing to you? You really are the most pig headed righteous little besom that I have ever met. You bloody infuriate me woman!”
He stood up and paced around the bench as Claire sat gently sobbing.
“I am so sorry Jamie, forgive me. I should have had it out with you, I should have called or asked someone at least. Lamb was so sure. Thinking back, that was probably at the start of his confusion. I let my stubborn pride get in the way of everything. I have been such a fool.”
Jamie sat back down and draped his arm around her shoulders and drew her closer to him. She melted into his side and groaned appreciatively.
“So, you forgive me?” she asked meekly.
“Aye Claire, forgiven, for anything that you have ever done and anything that you will ever do. There is nothing that I won’t forgive you for Sassenach.”
“Why?” she asked.
“Why what?” he replied.
“Why do you forgive me for anything I will ever do?”
“Because I love you Claire. I have loved you for as long as I can remember. I have been lost without you. I have been running from pillar to post trying to find something to ease the ache in my heart since I lost you. Nothing can fill it, only you.”
Claire took his face in her hands and gently pulled him into a sweet kiss.