Chapter 1: Never a dull day
Chapter Text
Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
There is never a dull day at SI
> DIS girl is on fire @hannah.mortic
RIT!?!?! Like there’s the experiments gone wrong, Dr. Nero and his hidey corner, the shines to Dr Banner, the slutty capt. America calendars in all the labs of floor 17, the always brok-
>> DIS girl is on fire @hannah.mortic
-en coffee machines on floor 27, the bimonthly karaoke in room 56, the rotten jello in the corner of lab 5, the daily sighs from security cause someone broke/lost/disintegrated their ba-
>>> DIS girl is on fire @hannah.mortic
-dges, tomato collector, the glow in the dark stars, lab 14, the shines to the mystery kid, the sleep deprived college interns, the Lost n Found keys box, the shines to Pepper Potts
>>>> 🏠PROLONGED EYE CONTACT @jerimy.chittick
Omfg I forgot about all the shrines💀
> stuck in daisy era🌼 @kk.ontheway
????? wtf goes on at si?????
>> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
Too much. TOO G#DD@MN MUCH.
>>> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
It’s okay, you can swear :)
— —
Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
To answer anyone’s questions, there was a experiment involving ink that destroy half of my ENTIRE YEAR’s research
-> quote
Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
There is never a dull day at SI
> Emeric H. @emeric.vanthuis
Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry that was under my supervision but the intern working with me had assured me that the measurements had been checked!
>> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
Wait, Emeric??? You have twitter????
>>> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
Also it’s okay, I had thankfully just had them digitally scanned but I was just about to go through and check mistakes :(
>>>> Emeric H. @emeric.vanthuis
Still I apologise! I’m willing to pay any damages or compensation that is needed!
> NinjaGO🌪️@colesasshole
dam shiiiii. tings rlly be going down @ si
— —
Interns official @stark.industry.intern
As always, we here at Stark Industry are very proper of the interns in our intern program. You may find more information about their work here -> www.stark.industry.org/interns
> Emeric H. @emeric.vanthuis
Very proud of the interns for the summer and break! We hope to see you all return for proper jobs in the future!
>> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
emeric im inlove with you.
>>> Emeric H. @emeric.vanthuis
Peter is that you? I’m so glad for such high praise!
> girls for girls @ahana.das
xoxo snd my luv to whoevr spnt 300+ wrds gushing ovr my project<33333
>> FUCK OFF, IM भारतीय @anjali.das
RIGHT!?!?! I want to kiss the pr department rn
>>> बेरोजगारी इंजीनियर @ansh.das
The whole department or my coworker you crush on?
>>>> FUCK OFF, IM भारतीय @anjali.das
FUCK OFF ANSH!!!!!
> LEEDing investigator @needleleedne
@peanut.packaging SNEAK ME INTO YOUR JOB PLSPLSPLSPLSPLSPLSPLS
>> PBPackage @peanut.packaging
sadly against code :(
— —
GARDEN JARGON @k.v.n
@h.t.o just saved your cakes, you should thank me.
> Harry Osborn DUPEE @h.t.o
wtf Kelly. y u @ me on my work acc???
>> GARDEN JARGON @k.v.n
You blocked me cause i spammed you too much. remember??
> MILK CARTON @maddynotcrazy
WAIT- (they don’t love u like i love u) this ain’t your main?? YOU LIED??
>> GARDEN JARGON @k.v.n
yeesh, yeah. si intern do have a different work acc :/. n i forgot my pw for my old main
— —
P.B.P right foot @p.b.p.stan
being on si intern twt is fucking wild. 1 min its all business n projects nx its like ‘whoops, jimmy mcfuckass blew up his desk n is on paid lve’
> ⛈️stuck in suffering era @penelope.ariti
It’s worse when you work here.
>> ⛈️stuck in suffering era @penelope.ariti
y did @//p.b.p.work get a fan acc bfre literally emeric or dr.nero or even dr. emma???
>>> ⛈️stuck in suffering era @penelope.ariti
OH SHIT ITS MYSTERY KID @si.interns.offwork!!!
— —
Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
@p.b.p.work YOU!!!
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
Jaydin???? Kyle???? Fen??? Lizzy???
>> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
Im low-key just spitting out people who’d just random angrily @ me
>> 失业工程师 @fen.lisha
PARKER ARE YOU MYSTERY KID??? AKA THE MYSTERIOUS BOY WONDER THAT WE HAVE SHRINES FOR??? AKA PROJECT FIXER GALORE??
>>> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
whoops.
— —
Pardonnez mon français @margot.peters
Pardon my French, but it really is never a fucking dull moment here :)
> Pardonnez mon français @margot.peters
Aka someone set up a shrine in one of the stalls. WHAT THE FUCK.
>> i failed spanish🌹 @ximena.flores
Nahhhhh @tony.stark deal with this shiii 💀💀
>>> i failed english🌹 @elizabeth.flowers
flower girl nooooooooo
> sloppy 🟠 joe’sssss @sandwhichmarker
ima crash out😭😭😭 wtf is wrong w de si interns 😭
>> sloppy 🟠 joe’sssss @sandwhichmarker
im scared.
>>> Haro? @kofi.mandela
We are too 😃
Chapter 2: It’s either sleep or work
Summary:
Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o
y tf do scientists act like they can only choose sleep or work
Notes:
HOW THE HELL HAS IT BEEN A MONTH ALREADY!?!!?!?! Y’alll🫠 I’m so sorry but this is gunna have really really slow updates until the summer.
I’ve been so fucking tired lately cause of school that when I have time, I’m just sleeping. BUT!! I had a free after my drama exam + ideas so WHAM!! Update!!
Plus all those lovely lovely comments have been wonderful to feed my motivation :]
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o
y tf do scientists act like they can only choose sleep or work
> Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o
and WHY the fuck is it tarantulas
> the ONLY girl @spacegirlllllll
Mr. Fake Harry 🥺 c-can we pwebeians pwease have s-some information?
>> Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o
They made the spider enclosure into a fucking news station.
>>> GARDON JARGON @k.v.n
NAH💀 they anny him 2 mch dat he fix his grammerrr
— —
Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
100k retweets + y’all get Spider-man to come help us and we release the spider news station clips
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
200k and ill release the bts + workers being scared by Hunter & friends
>> i failed english🌹 @elizabeth.flowers
why did only the name get proper punctuation????
> I am the monster rawr rawr @dinonugii
@tony.stark please please please please please please please id litdrerallym gife my firsedt boorn for the insfrns
>> space girl show me the stars @stargirllllll
@tony.stark pls it b so fny!!!!
— —
ME WANT MORE EPIC⛈️ @penelope.ariti
Holy shit.
> Epic reference? @glowwingheaven
penelope. penelope you can’t just comment that moments after the tweet got 300k+ and then dip
>> the ONLY girl @spacegirlllllll
Penelope, we’re waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting~
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
PENELOPE DONT FALL FOR IT!!!! SAY NOTHING!!!
>> Ky’s corner! @bipolartolar
pls…. we are starving…. give us food…
— —
Weige made me cry. @alb1n0c4t
SI intern: tweets something cryptic
the whole superhero fandom: OMG!1!1!1!1!1!! That’s a (insert superhero) reference!!!
> Spidey’s left foot @sp1pderw1fe
BUT THIS TIME IS PROBABLY IS!!!!! ESPECIALLY RIGHT AFTER THE SPIDER NEWSTATION TWEET!?!
>> YellowIvy @justa_normie
Jen…… no…
> Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
man. we hope to cause more chaos :)
-Jaydin
— —
THAT DAM GAY PJO FAN @pj0.pls
being w/ SI.I fandosm, is like a well that never dries
> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
I guess that makes me wet. Let me call my boyfriend-
>> 失业工程师 @fen.lisha
Kyle noooooooo :[
> nostalgia’s a bitch @jaydin.b.Lejues
guess that makes me wet, let me call my girlfriend
>> 失业工程师 @fen.lisha
Jaydin not you too :(((
— —
Pardonnez mon français @margot.peters
Happy black history month to Kofi and Kofi only.
> Look in the mirror? @kofi.mandela
Thank you???
>> i failed spanish🌹 @ximena.flores
This fels racist??? smh
> if only you were mineX2 @xoxo.k1tkat
uh….margot what brought this on??
>> Pardonnez mon français @margot.peters
Kofi’s little shits for kids
>>> Look in the mirror? @kofi.mandela
If you wanna my lover you gotta get with my friends(kids). make it last forever, friendship(family) never ends!
>>>> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
WHEN DID YOU GUYS START DATING!?!?!
>>>>> Pardonnez mon français @margot.peters
a month ago.
— —
girls for girls @ahana.das
I was told I have to ask y’all to support the spider news station
> बेरोजगारी इंजीनियर @ansh.das
THAT’s why you’re ignoring my text????
>> FUCK OFF, IM भारतीय @anjali.das
no it’s cause they got a new crush~
>>> girls for girls @ahana.das
YOU’RE NOT ANY BETTER SO STFU!!
>>>> FUCK OFF, IM भारतीय @anjali.das
keep yourself safe :)
> thank you Beyoncé @k3ntucky-st4t3
Ana no😭😭
>> girls for girls @ahana.das
Im revoking your nickname privileges.
— —
Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
Us: *does a silly*
The internet: *burns*
> Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
I mean it was already burning but y’know!
- Kyle
Notes:
can you tell I haven’t been getting enough sleep? Cause I can.
Chapter 3: Book of revelations
Summary:
gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
Today. My bf met my fam. Here’s a list of how we told them we’s dating :)
Notes:
GANG???? I’m back. Wow. Life been crazy. Uh. Ao3 author curse really been killing me😭🙏. Had a slight scare with parents having a fight that looked like (maybe) divorce(ITS NOT!!!), had exams, went kayaking and got caught in the middle of a large lake cause I tried to switch partners but the new partner got stuck in the docks for a bit (my arm went numb for the whole day after😰) and now I’ve got a week and half of school left!!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
Today. My bf met my fam. Here’s a list of how we told them we’s dating :)
> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
- “We’re Christmas cardinals!”
- “Basically Spock and Kirk.”
- “We’re roommates!”
- “We’re bed tanglers :)”
- “(Me) is my favorite wrestling buddy!”
- “I’m a flight risk and (me) is my parol officer!”
>> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
AND HE FUCKITN SAID THESE THINGS TO MY AOUNTS ANF EVEN MY *GRANDMUHER* & *GRANDFSTHER*
>> Banned from kitchen :( @hannah.mortic
Kyle. KYLE. tell Adam i love him<3(/p)
>> what the helliante @kofi.mandela
I think I’m going to steal some of these for my “coming out to my(38) parents(59&62) as not actually a straight as, straight forward, straight girl”
>>> what the helliante @kofi.mandela
They’ll be more mad about the “not a straight a+ student”
— —
🏠JULES NOOOOOO @jerimy.chittick
I need to shame some people.
> 🏠JULES NOOOOOO @jerimy.chittick
@hannah.mortic & @jamsey.kennith fucking left the country, didn’t tell anyone, got reported missing and-
>> 🏠JULES NOOOOOO @jerimy.chittick
-then texts the group chat ‘id never go down that easy’
>> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
Cause I’d never go down that easy.
>>> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
And we were visiting our muma for her 80th birthday :)
— —
Emeric H. @emeric.vanthuis
I am pleased to announce that I support the Spider News Station! I believe we should support our interns in their every inderver!
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
emeric im inlove with you.
> Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
Emeric we’re in love with you.
> Interns official @stark.industry.intern
Emeric we love you.
— —
🚦New life series?? @add.to.them
New twitter, whose this!!!
> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. GUYS. Oh my goddddddd
>> i failed spanish🌹 @ximena.flores
Ew. You’re salivating irritates me because I can tell that there is something not right with you. You are not a man. I cannot believe it.
>>> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
That’s a lot of words to call me gay :/ insult me like a normal homophobe or I’m blocking you
>>>> i failed spanish🌹 @ximena.flores
gay.
>>>>> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
jk! I’m still blocking you :)
>> i failed english🌹 @elizabeth.flowers
Gay bitch.
— —
Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
Okay okay okay!!! We’ve got your dms!!! We knowwwww!!! So please let us show you our wonderful creation!!!
-Kyle
> Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
[video description: the video opens with a tarantula sat in a cardboard container made to look like a new station. There is a small sign that says the name “Hunter Huntsman”. The camera zooms out and sitting in front of the Spider New Station is Spider-man. There are a few strange noises made, to which Spider-man nods.
“I’m so grateful to be here today, Hunter.” Spider-man says, indicating that he is speaking to the spider. “Oh! Right! Hunter said he is very happy to be the centre of attention and that I’m here!”
Video ends]
>> Interns off duty @si.interns.offwork
Watch the whole video on our YouTube channel: SI interns offline >:3
-Jaydin
> sarahs.digi @sarahs.digi
HOY SHRR!!!
> 🌟Spencer🌟 @jumped_out_ed
WE DID BOYS!
> june @thisisphinn
i can finally die….
— —
There are others ways to score @kofi.mandela
Yes I helped them record it.
Yes I helped them edit it.
No I will not give you bloopers.
> The children yearn for the mines @minecraftbookshelf
Kofi. Wa u wan for it Kofi?
>> There are others ways to score @kofi.mandela
I am SO glad you asked :) so my Amazon wish list is my bio >v<!!! Buy like four things and I’m post the bloopers comp :)
>>> Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o.
Torture them Kofi.
— —
Not Ana @user_3757328
Throwaway account so they don’t hunt me down
> Not Ana @user_3757328
Turns out there was a a secret spy in the interns again :/ so now SM had to stop mid films, beat the guy up(I think Jaydin was drooling??)
>> Not Ana @user_3757328
and said “I guess I should become an intern to replace him :D”
>>> Not Ana @user_3757328
btw. Jaydin wasn’t the only one. I counted like 4 gay awakenings and 3 straight girlies thirsting.
>> Not Ana @user_3757328
Anyway, he’s ours now :)
— —
¡~Sunday~! @jaydin.b.Lejues
Which one of you fuckers did it?
> FUCK OFF, IM भारतीय @anjali.das
Ana.
> बेरोजगारी इंजीनियर @ansh.das
Ana.
> girls for girls @ahana.das
No fucking loyalty.
>> GARDEN JARGON @k.v.n
Dn’t wry grlie. yna. hairy abndn me as wll :/
— —
STOP SINGING TO ME @penelope.ariti
please please please please please please please please please please stop singing ~Penelope~ Penelope~ to me. I get it. please.
> 失业工程师 @fen.lisha
Got it. Kill everyone that does
>> STOP SINGING TO ME @penelope.ariti
FEN NO-
Notes:
Might do a more Peter focus chapter soon 😁
Chapter 4: Bad little guys
Summary:
> 失业工程师 @fēn.lisha
PENELOPE PLEASE STOP HANGING OUT WITH MY BROTHER> 失业工程师 @fēn.lisha
PENELOPE I AM CATCHING STRAYS
Notes:
My bad!!! I genuinely have had this chapter ready for like two weeks😭🙏 I just keep forgetting to upload it.
Today’s jokes are brought to you by LánLán teaching my Chinese curse words because, in his words, “It’s funny because your voice makes it sound like a little child cursing”. And also Baby+Baby for ruining my confidence by making me feel old.
Thanks blue rose and Conception
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Penelope? Like cantaloupe? @penelope.ariti
頂你個肺<3
> At least I’d be a cowboy.. @k.v.n
Pen. Penelope. PLZ tll me u dnt knwo wat ur sying😭🙏💔🥀
> girls NEED girls @ahana.das
I swear if this was fēn….
> 失业工程师 @fēn.lisha
PENELOPE PLEASE STOP HANGING OUT WITH MY BROTHER</3
>> 失业工程师 @fēn.lisha
PENELOPE I AM CATCHING STRAYS
>>> Penelope? Like cantaloupe? @penelope.ariti
食父囝
>>>> 失业工程师 @fēn.lisha
im going to kill LánLán
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
@fēn.lisha hook me up? Either way works ;)
>> ANTI Penis Parker @fēn.lisha
Fuck off Parker. You’re not touching my sweet, innocent little brother.
— —
Just Jay @jay.moretits
I’ve decided I’m just Jay now, alright? She/they for the win??
> DIS girl is under water @hannah.mortic
Ja-son? More like Ja-daughter<3
>> Just Jay @jay.moretits
im telling mom your transphobic.
>>> DIS girl is under water @hannah.mortic
FUCK YOU JAY
> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
Proud of you Jay!!!
>> Bitch u thought @jamsey.kennith
Kys Hannah.
— —
I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
Work crush? More like work CRUSHED.
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
Because my project got crushed.
> Dr Emmie @emma.lorestone
Please stop encouraging stupid behaviour, and perhaps, your projects will be fine.
>> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
Too much effort, thanks :/
— —
बेरोजगारी इंजीनियर @ansh.das
Might change my url…. Send suggestions!!!
> Penelope? Like cantaloupe? @penelope.ariti
頂你個肺<3333
>> बेरोजगारी इंजीनियर @ansh.das
Penny plz.
>>> Penelope? Like cantaloupe? @penelope.ariti
my bad, gang. LánLán is a bad influence
> girls NEED girls @ahana.das
Least fav
>> बेरोजगारी इंजीनियर @ansh.das
Telling mom you and JJ broke up 🤭
— —
Jet 2 Holiday @kofi.mandela
Why is Fēn still in the interns twitter if they aren’t an intern anymore?
> ANTI penis Parker @fēn.lisha
Cuz I can
> i failed spanish🌹 @ximena.flores
Cause he can
> i failed english🌹 @elizabeth.flowers
Because he can
> GIMME ROBUX FOR DANDY’S PLZ @jaydin.b.Lejues
Cuz he can
> gay hedgehogs 💙🖤❤️ @k.c.m.
Just cuz he can
> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
I still think I should be let in :/
— —
Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o.
w-wat if… i become REAL harry osborn??
> Harry.. STYLES?! @hosborn
PLEASE 🙏 I’m so tired of school, work, etc. take my place❤️
>> I’m workin’ @p.b.p.work
Imagine + L + ratio
>>> Harry.. STYLES?! @hosborn
:( Peber…
>> Fake Harry Osborn @h.t.o.
FUCK no. /pos
— —
🏠just tears. Thanks. @jerimy.chittick
Logging on twitter for my once a month check in, logging off because I’m scared.
> Litith Home @notlitithhome
oh to be jerimy chittick who has to will power not to use social media</3
> cqrolive @strqwberryyy
U poor, poor, pathetic soul
> GOOP @goopbuni
Ur life must b sad..
> ImaCollectoYourHeart @p1per_mcqueen
Can’t tell if I hate you or love you 😋
— —
🏠just tears. Thanks. @jerimy.chittick
Reason #1 on why twitter fucking sucks.
> quote tweet
cqrolive @strqwberryyy
U poor, poor, pathetic soul
> FUCK OFF, IM भारतीय @anjali.das
You poor, poor, pathetic soul
>> 🏠just tears. Thanks. @jerimy.chittick
Jali :( I thought you loved me?
>>> i failed spanish🌹 @ximena.flores
You don’t deserve her.
> 🦇🩸Avid x Scott? When? @crimsonl0v3
Wowza. Dat’s lowk emberrassing
>> 🏠just tears. Thanks. @jerimy.chittick
WHY IS EVERYONE FUCKING BULLYING ME???
— —
Quitting my job. Sigh @h.t.o.
do a tour, kid comes up, plays “Jet 2 Holiday”, surprise we know it because “we’re old enough to be his grandparents. Actually you are my grandfather now”
> Quitting my job @h.t.o.
IM ON A CRUTCH FOR 2 WEEKS AND THOS IS THE THANKS I GET?!4?$
> MOST favourite @ansh.das
Your my grandpa<3
>> Quitting my job. Sigh @h.t.o.
i have your mother number.
>>> MOST favourite @ansh.das
Yeah. Cuz she’s your dahghter
>>>> Quitting my job. Sigh @h.t.o.
im sending her your tweets.
> At least I’d be a cowboy.. @k.v.n
m grndfthr >:( thy cnt stl u frm m!!!
>> Quitting my job. Sigh @h.t.o.
Ok.
Notes:
If I made any character mistakes for curse words im killing myself. Thanks.
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ToManyFandomsOrKinaFS on Chapter 2 Fri 28 Feb 2025 01:15AM UTC
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glowwingheaven on Chapter 2 Fri 28 Feb 2025 12:30AM UTC
Last Edited Fri 28 Feb 2025 12:33AM UTC
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