Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I want to join you.” Robin said, his voice shaky. He didn’t look up at Kon. Or as he was better known by the public, Kryptonite. Superman’s greatest enemy and a villain to the world.

Tim’s best friend.

“You what?” Kon asked, surprised, and Tim sighed, finally making eye contact.

“I want to join Anti-Justice.”

Before he even had time to react, Kon had scooped Tim up and grinned as bright as the sun, making his breath hitch. He couldn’t remember anyone ever being this happy to have him around. Even Dick.

“Dude! The others are gonna be so freaking excited!” He beamed, ruffling Tim’s hair and messing it up. “What made you finally change your mind?”

He thought back to Bruce’s dead body and took calming breaths. He managed a small smile up at his friend. “There’s nothing for me there anymore.” He said sadly. Kon frowned and pulled him into another half hug.

“Don’t worry, man. You’ve already got your own room at the mountain and everything. We’ve been waiting for you for forever , you know? You have a place with us. Forever.”

Tim couldn’t help leaning into the touch and relaxing. His friends, evil or not, wanted him. They had a place for him when he had no other. Carved it out specifically for him, which contrasted to everywhere else where he had to bend and twist himself to fit. He sighed and surrendered himself over to this new life.

Maybe it would end up better for him.

“Kids! I’m home!” Kon called in a cheery voice, stalking into the mountain like he owned the place. He technically did, Tim supposed. 

A blur of black and yellow crashed into his friend at the speed of light, stabilizing into someone Tim recognized. “Kon!” He chirped, before noticing Tim looking a little awkward. His eyes went comically wide and he gasped dramatically, moving to give Tim a handful of speedster. “Robbie!”

Tim rolled his eyes at the nickname but threaded his fingers through Bart’s hair anyway. Kon had given the annoying term to him way back when they first met, and it rubbed off on the whole team. Now they call him all sorts of things that sometimes he wonders what they even have to do with his name.  He doesn’t mind it much anymore; it's almost amusing, even. But still acts annoyed for them.

“Hey, baby flash.” He said fondly, a smile twitching at his lips. Bart grinned up at him and Kon’s warm hand ruffled his hair. 

“Bart, no costumes inside.”

Bart groaned, sticking his tongue out in annoyance. “Okay, okay, mom.” He grumbled. In a flash, he was changed into a too big shirt and some shorts. “Better?”

“Is that my shirt?” Kon squawked. Bart ignored him, grabbing Tim by the hand and dragging him deeper into the cave. Kon sighed and followed, hands in his pockets.

“C’mon! The girls are in the kitchen ‘cuz Cissie’s cooking lunch. Are you hungry? I am.” He rambled. Tim nodded along when asked a question because he honestly only got half the information, but allowed himself to be dragged along. 

In the kitchen Burning Star and Scarlet arrow were both in casual clothes, talking brightly about what seemed to be random chatter. The smell of food filled Tim’s nose and he was suddenly hit with how hungry he was.

Leaving Gotham that morning wasn’t a last minute decision, not by a long shot. He had everything perfectly planned to make the transition of his absence as seamless as possible for the others. Made sure everything was covered, every case was closed. Decided on the day he was going to call for Kon weeks in advance.

But he still had managed to forget breakfast that morning.

Cissie turned away from the stove and noticed the boys. Her eyes lit up when they met Tim’s, and Cassie turned around as well. “Robbie-boy! Hey!” She beamed. “What’cha doing here? Finally joining us?”

“Uh, yeah.” Tim said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped, but it quickly turned back to joy. 

“That’s great!” She said brightly, jumping up to pull him into a tight hug. “Welcome to the team, wonder!” 

“Yeah, welcome!” Cissie added, her smile genuine. Tim waved back and muttered a thanks to both of them, head getting fuzzy with nerves. Kon bumped their shoulders together and Tim felt himself relaxing, somehow. His heart rate evened back out and he offered a grateful smile. 

He’d thought a lot about leaving before actually doing it. Even before Batman died.

He’d met the group of teenage villain misfits early into his career as Robin. Back when the job was more work than play; he’d trained his ass off to get to that point and it wasn’t as fun as Dick and Jason made it look. That didn’t mean Tim was going to give up, of course not. Batman needed him–who knows what would have happened to him and Gotham. That didn’t make it less wearing, though.

Meeting a group of villains his age who matched his level and added a pleasant chaos to his life that made the days different and the days a little brighter. It gave him something to look forward to. They would bicker and compliment each other and Tim usually ended up covering for them. Then they’d go out as civilians and do random kid stuff and Tim had never felt more accepted. 

They had to grow up, though, eventually. There wasn’t time to be kids anymore. They still found time to hang out on rooftops together and talk and help each other out. Tim covered their tracks still, occasionally. Not that there was anything too bad to cover up.

Nobody on the Anti-Justice killed. 

Kon mainly just annoyed and inconvenienced Superman. Messed up Metropolis, helped out villains, and helped out the others with whatever they needed. Bart mainly just did what the group needed. He was attached to them, and as far as Tim learned, didn’t have any motives outside of being attached to Kon. He came from the future without any ties to his family, so the team became their family. 

Cassie lost her mom as Wondergirl. Tim knew her a little back then, but being so busy with Robin training made him a bit isolated from the rest of the hero community. Her and Arrowette joined Kon and Bart, forming their own team. The girls are more against the Justice League, having their own personal problems with the members. They do what they can to hurt them. 

And Tim knew he wouldn’t be able to kill. Ra’s Al Ghul tried to convince him a few times, when he got to low points. But he always managed to push through. Turning to the other side wasn’t going to change that. Luckily, he knew his friends, his knew team, would support that. Agree with that. Help with whatever he needed.

The feeling was nice.

“Here. Bats gotta eat too.” Cissie said insistently, setting a plate of food at the counter and guiding Tim to sit in the chair in front of it. Tim didn’t argue; he was starving after all. And the food was really, really good. Tim hummed in delight and didn’t blink an eye when Bart wriggled up into his lap, or when Cassie sat next to him, or when Kon ruffled his hair.

“Thank you.” He said genuinely. “All of you.”

“Of course.” Cissie said warmly.

“We’re just glad to have you here, Rob.” Cassie grinned, elbowing him. Tim winced internally and rolled his eyes externally. 

“Not Rob anymore. I don’t know who I am.” He mumbled, trying not to sound bitter. He took another bite of food to avoid speaking again. More arms wrapped around him and he felt warmth from all sides, squeezing him just barely too tight. 

“That’s okay.” Cissie said softly, squeezing his hand. “We can figure it out together.”

Chapter Text

Tim couldn’t sleep.

That wasn’t an abnormal thing; he didn’t sleep much at the manor, or his apartment. So it wasn’t like he was expecting to suddenly sleep better in a different environment. That didn’t make it suck any less, though.

There was just too much on his mind constantly. Cases, the family, emergencies in Gotham. Silence made it all rise to the surface in a way that never failed to overwhelm him.

He ended up just wandering the halls of the mountain, drawing a mental map in his head of the layout. His footsteps were quiet, but the echo still settled him slightly.

“Hey, man.” Kon’s voice said casually. The warm red t-shirt he was wearing was the first thing that caught Tim’s attention. It was so different from his costume, Tim couldn’t help but stare a little longer than necessary. “Couldn’t sleep?”

“Nah.” Tim shrugged, looking away and instead down the empty hallway. “Decided to explore a bit.”

Kon hummed before heading down the hall Tim was looking at, gesturing for him to follow. “C’mon. Let’s try something else.”

They ended up in the kitchen, Tim sitting in a barstool with a cup of tea in his hands. “I don’t know if I should be surprised or not that you guys keep my favorite tea.”

“Cissie likes it too!” Kon defended, cheeks a little red, but Tim could see the barely hidden smile. “But we did technically start keeping it when you told us you liked it.” He admitted. Tim couldn’t keep the smile off his own face at that, bumping their shoulders together.

“You guys are a bunch of saps.”

“Oh, whatever.” Kon huffed, pulling Tim into a proper hug. He smelled like tea and wind and kevlar. It was what he had learned to associate his friend with. It never failed to make Tim feel safe, strangely enough. “You love it, don’t lie.”

And yeah, Tim did love it. He could feel his heart warming at the knowledge that his friends paid attention to him that much, and cared enough to keep the things he liked around.

The bats were detectives, and they didn’t pay that much attention to him.

Sure, they did some things. Alfred kept this same tea in the cabinet in the manor’s kitchen. Bruce knew what kinds of cases made Tim uncomfortable and avoided assigning them to him. Dick always seemed to know when he needed a hug. 

He didn’t get many hugs anymore. Not that he blamed Dick, of course. He had a lot on his plate, and was under a lot of pressure. He didn’t have time to analyze all of Tim’s moods and help him through them all the time

And while he used to get along with Jason, they didn’t hang out anymore. 

The warmth and family he once had with the Waynes was gone now, replaced by a cold, empty feeling. The feeling was all too familiar, reflecting the relationship he shared with his parents. And now, a part of him wondered if the same would happen with his friends.

If they fell apart at his touch, ruined by Tim, he’d never forgive himself. But it also seemed all too likely.

But the other part of him craved this family. Wanted to be surrounded by these people who cared about him, loved him, were there for him. He wanted to be with the ones his heart longed for. It was selfish of him, really.

“Red looks good on you.” Tim found himself saying, definitely not trying to distract his thoughts with a new subject or anything. Kon didn’t seem to notice though, beaming proudly.

“Thanks! I prefer it, actually, instead of green. Really dislike green, actually. Doesn’t suit me. But Red’s too Superman and not enough Kryptonite, y’know? So green it is.”

Tim hummed. “That sucks.”

“It does.” Kon sighs, but shrugs it off. “Nothing I can do though, I guess. Unfortunately you guys are the only ones who get the privilege of seeing me at my best.” 

He clicked his tongue and did finger guns, winking at Tim. It startled a laugh out of him, which Kon seemed pleased at. He looked into Tim’s empty cup and hummed.

“C’mon, Wonder.” He said, placing the mug in the sink. Tim huffed.

“Is that nickname gonna stick forever?”

“Yup.” The kryptonian grinned, throwing an arm around his friend and leading him out of the kitchen. But instead of bringing Tim back to the room he was given, Kon knocked on a random door. He didn’t wait for permission to walk in, dropping Tim on the bed. He made an exasperated noise of surprise, but was quickly attacked by a warm, tiny body.

“Bart.” He complained, but was ignored. So ignored, in fact, that Kon pretended not to see him mouthing for help, choosing to lie on top of him. The weight wasn’t crushing or anything–it was more of a pleasantly heavy blanket. Tim liked the warmth, if he was being honest. Not that he told them, of course.

But he figured they knew anyway.

Adjusting to a new place had never been easy. 

Sure, he did it all the time. Boarding schools, the manor, apartments. He knew how to keep himself calm; how to quickly and cleanly force his body to adjust. It was part of being a vigilante.

But that didn’t make it easy. 

His sleep schedule was all out of order. Which wasn’t out of the ordinary, but still annoying. He actually did like being in the sun, no matter what his pale skin and habit of staying inside may suggest.

The weather in Happy Harbor was wildly different from Gotham. A big jump that may not have been a bad thing, necessarily, but was still hard to get used to. Clear air was nice but odd for someone raised in the smog that was supposedly safe to breath.

And people. So many people. 

Where Tim had grown up with silence and solitude in the house, there was now noise and chaos and people. He thought the manor, which rarely had everyone in it and was always busy in the vigilante way, was considered a busy household. That was laughable.

Everyone ate meals together. Talked about everything. Never went on missions alone, had sleepovers in the living room. Watched movies and tv shows they’d loudly talk about and play music they’d sing along to, usually off key.

Tim was never pressured to join any of their activities, of course, but it was still an odd experience.

Sometimes he climbed into secret hiding places to relax and get some quiet. But then he’d find himself missing them and crawl out. If he didn’t come out soon enough, Kon would locate him with superhearing or TTK and they’d all coo at him, calling him a variety of bird names.

Speaking of names.

Tim had no idea what his undercover name should be. 

He’d already designed a new suit, all black and made more for stealth than style. Had it made, it was hanging in his closet at the moment. But he refused to try it on without a name. He never realized how good he had it, the name coming with the suit. Now, nothing sounded good enough. It wasn’t perfect, it wasn’t him.

It sucked, honestly.

So he stuck to computer stuff for the time being. Covering tracks, designing them all new suits, upgrading things at the mountain. Looking through the Justice League’s files both about the mountain and to see what they were doing. It all kept him comfortably busy.

Busy was good. It meant less overthinking, dreamless nights, and less time feeling alone. Not that feeling alone was really a problem anymore.

It was kind of nice to have company while he worked. It almost reminded him of how he and Bruce would sit together in the cave, silent for hours. Later in Tim’s career he felt comfortable enough to crawl into Bruce’s lap and they’d share the computer screen. The memories of gloved hands running through his hair, warm and comfortable, still found their way into his dreams sometimes.

Kon’s hand felt eerily similar, at times. And sometimes when Cissie spoke he thought it was Dick. Or at a glance, Cassie training in the gym reminded him of Jason.

Not that they were those people. Because they weren’t.

Kon was loud and bright and grinned too much to be Batman. Cissie’s hair was too blonde to be mistaken with Dick’s pretty raven. Seeing Cassie fly would fix any confusion in Tim’s brain real quick. And Bart adored Tim far too much to remind Tim of Damian when their size was taken out of the equation.

It hurt, sometimes, the way his brain automatically looked for his old family in his new one. The way sometimes he missed that family more than he wanted to be here. That even despite those feelings, he knew he could never go back. That there was nothing there for him, but everything here. But that knowledge wasn’t enough to make the hurt go away.

Tim really, really hated new places.

Chapter Text

Strangely enough, Tim never thought of himself as lonely. 

Not when he was little, raised by nannies and admiring his parents as if they were untouchable. Maybe they were, really. It could have been that he just didn’t know what loneliness was. The emotion was never explained to him. He never knew he was supposed to get more attention and company than he did.

But his parents loved him, and at the end of the day that was enough. They brought him presents and called him all the time and told him how good he did in school. They were kind to him and how was he supposed to know he needed more? All he knew was what he had.

When he was old enough to go to a boarding school, he felt even less lonely. There were people everywhere, and he found himself making friends easily enough. Sure, they came and went easily, but he figured that was normal. 

And starting out as Robin, he figured Batman was as cold to the other Robins when they started as he was to Tim. They had to focus on the mission, after all. So he knew nothing about affection in the capes. 

But then, over time, Batman became Bruce or B and the manor became his second home. He got hugs from Dick and Bruce ruffled his hair and for once, Tim knew affection. He understood what was so great about touch, beginning to crave the warmth from other people. 

But he didn’t let himself feel upset when he didn’t get it. Didn’t want to get attached to something so fragile and easy to lose. One wrong move, and it could lead to getting fired from Robin and no more warmth. It would never be as easy to live without it as before, but he’d survive. 

As time went on, the family grew. Tim got less attention from Bruce and Dick, but it made sense. He understood. He wouldn’t be selfish. That didn’t take the ache away, though, the craving to curl up with them once again. 

But he had Cass now! And Steph was cool and a good girlfriend and it was nice having more people on your side on patrol.

He didn’t let it affect his work. He numbed himself back to the familiar cold and forced himself back into the person who didn’t need it. Difficult, but possible. And he felt more dedicated to the mission with all the time he’d spent as Robin. So there was no way he was going to mess it up now.

He felt useful, at least. 

It was okay that his parents died because he had Robin to occupy his mind. Did he dream of hearing his mother’s voice again? Feeling his dad’s hand squeeze his shoulder? Knowing that if he really needed them, they’d come home for him? That if he really tried, he could have saved them?

Yeah, maybe. But it was okay. He was fine. Totally fine. He really couldn’t complain, because he still had the manor, still had his family.  

Until things weren't okay anymore.

They went downhill, at first. Higher crime rates, so everyone became busier and got less sleep and bickered more. Then Bruce’s biological child popped into Gotham with a history of killing and an eye for Robin. The manor became tense and unsafe. He and Steph fought a lot. Nobody had time for anything leisurely. He spent more and more time alone.

Bruce dying was just the final straw that broke the dam. Everyone got sent into a spiral. Damian needed Robin and Dick needed space and everyone needed less of Tim Drake. 

No longer was the manor a sanctuary from loneliness and a bubble of safety, but a prickly shell of what it once was. The walls creaked with loneliness and echoes of past laughter. It only served as a reminder of what Tim lost.

He knew there was no longer a place for Tim Drake there. And that was okay. He had a place somewhere else.

A group of villain kids who’d formed a team and invited him to join numerous times. They didn’t force anything, but brought it up often; both jokingly and seriously.

They’d sneak into Gotham as civilians to hang out, and if Tim was on a mission outside the gloomy city they were there to pester him. Never hurt him, though. The opposite, actually. 

Over and over again, they made sure he knew they were there. They’d catch him if he fell off a building and find a way to help him study with a test in the same week. Took him to the beach (they insisted he didn’t get enough sunlight in Gotham) and let him ramble on about anything and everything, even the nerdy stuff. 

From the moment Robin caught them taking down a building in Metropolis, (it was empty, being reconstructed from the last time a villian destroyed it) and they grinned at him with childlike pride, a bond clicked.

Traumatized teenagers (though Tim wasn’t really traumatized, come on now) running around in suits trying to do good for themselves. Desperate for connection, for companions that would take the brokenness in them and still stay. Treat them with familiarity and acceptance and fill the void of loneliness that came from this life

Did Tim accept this bond at first? Of course not! How could he be friends with goofy, reckless teenage villains? He never even considered it to be an option. But they still managed to worm their way into Tim’s life and stay there. Make an imprint so hard he could hardly remember how he got on without them. 

The connection ran so deep it buried itself in his bones and felt like he’d break without it. 

When it came to leaving his life as Tim Drake to move into what used to be Mount Justice, (they always just called it “the mountain,” since they couldn’t agree on a new name) Tim felt weird. Not good, or bad, but maybe just uncomfortable. He had never been the biggest fan of change, even when it was for the better.

He carefully let go of all his responsibilities in both lives until there was nothing left for him, and he was free. Giving away patrol routes, dropping out of high school his senior year, assigning his unfinished cases to someone else. Then erasing himself from all the systems and…leaving. Abandoning Gotham with a note that said not to look for him. That was it.

It was easier than he thought it would be, though, at the end of the day. It felt like he was fifteen again, leaving his parent’s house to live in the warmth of Wayne Manor, with Dick and Bruce and Alfred. Trading in the empty shell of a broken household for a loving family. 

As guilty as he wished he could be, he had no regrets. 

His friends loved him. They were bright, warm, and showed their love for each other through everything they did.

While the love he got in Wayne Manor was a huge improvement from before, it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t the same as Bart’s hugs, or Cassie’s hands running through his hair. It wasn’t Kon’s smile of Cissie’s baked goods. It wasn’t the feeling of ending the day in the same bed as everyone, feeling loved and cared for. He didn’t just feel useful, he felt valuable. 

So what if his life wasn’t ideal up to this point? He wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Not if it meant he got to end up here with his family.

Chapter Text

“Pain on a scale of one to ten?”

“Like a one.”

“Tim.

“I’m serious!” He laughed, pushing himself up into a sitting position. He was easily able to ignore the stinging on his back. “I’ve been through a lot worse, Cis. How’s it look?”

She hummed, face proud as she admired her work. “Prretty damn good.”

“Dude, it looks great!” Kon grinned, helping him stand. Not that he needed the help, but he wasn’t one to not take Kon’s hand. Bart was practically vibrating beside him, and Greta was admiring with wonder in her eyes. Unable to keep a smile off his face, Tim led his team to the nearest bathroom to use the mirror. He turned around and his breath hitched. 

Big beautiful, inky black wings covered his back. A part of him almost thought they were too pretty to be attached to someone like him. But the other part of him puffed up with pride. 

“I love them.” He breathed, despite intending to speak with more confidence. The wonder in his voice was easily heard by his friends, judging by the way Kon and Cissie high fived. “They’re perfect, Cissie. Thank you.”

She grinned and leaned into the arm Kon threw around her. “No problem. You think Cass will be impressed?”

“Definitely.” Kon said. Tim hummed in agreement.

“They’re very pretty.” Greta said, her soft voice full of wonder. “I’ve never seen anything like them before.”

“Yeah, most people don’t like having such large visible tattoos.” Tim said, preening in the mirror for a few minutes more before putting on a shirt and diving into getting his new suit made.

One year.

It’s been one year since Tim switched sides. Since he joined his friends and felt his heart melt back into the mushiness of having a family. He liked it. The clearer air, the people around him, having a clear purpose. He couldn’t think of anything better, really.

A group of villain kids who’d formed a team and invited him numerous times. They didn’t force him, of course, but brought it up often.

They’d sneak into Gotham as civilians and made sure if Tim had a mission outside of the gloomy city, they were there to pester him. Over and over, they made sure he knew that if he was in trouble, they’d be there. Whether it was falling off of a building or studying for a test, they’d find a way to be there.

From the moment he caught them destroying a building in Metropolis, and they grinned at him with a childlike pride, a bond clicked into place. Traumatized teenagers running around trying to do goof for themselves. Desperate for connection, for companions who would take the brokenness in them and still stay. Treat them with acceptance and familiarity and fill the void of loneliness that came with this life.

Did Tim accept the bond at first? Of course not! How could he be friends with reckless teenage villains? It wasn’t exactly planned. But they still managed to worm their way into Tim’s life and stay there. Make an imprint so hard he can hardly remember how he lived without them before. The connection ran so deep it buried itself in his bones and held him together when he was breaking.

When it came to leaving his life as Tim Drake, to move into what used to be Mount Justice, it was easier than he thought.

Sure, it was strange to let go of all his responsibilities, in both identities. Giving away his patrol routes, dropping out of school, leaving his unsolved cases for someone else. Dropping out of all the systems and left Gotham with a scribbled note that said “Don’t look for me.”

It felt like he was fifteen again, leaving his parents’ house to live in the warmth of Wayne manor. Trading the empty shell of a broken household for a loving family. Leaving his parents no more than a fond memory in his head to fully engage in the love he’d found in Bruce, Alfred and Dick.

Even now, he had no regrets.

His friends loved him. They were bright, warm, and showed their love for each other through everything they did

Tim never went through the day without feeling cared for. He never feared backup wouldn’t come for him. He didn’t just feel useful, he felt valuable. 

So what if his life wasn’t ideal up to this point? He wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Not if it meant he’d end up here, with his family.

At this point, missions were more for the thrill than anything. Tim couldn’t help the way he enjoyed them.

Going out in his new suit, inky wings on display, it was freedom. The others made him wait until the tattoo had fully healed before going out with his back exposed, but the payoff was worth it. Everyone went on the mission together, just to celebrate.

What a mistake that was.

At the end of the day, the Anti-Justice weren’t on the list of most threatening villains.

They didn’t kill, didn’t do things too terrible. They were more chaotic teenaged inconveniences. They weren’t a worldwide threat. So Tim didn’t really think the Justice League would come after them. Which was stupid, looking back on it. Always be prepared, always have the worst case scenario planned out, was what Bruce always told him. 

Tim had gotten a lot more lax. Less tense, less prepared. So he wasn’t prepared when they were swarmed, outnumbered, attacked. He couldn’t get them out. He failed.

Waking up in a med bay was not what Tim expected. The solitude, sure, but a medical room? No. He was thinking more along the lines of a cell, or a white room with no visible doors.

But where he was wan’t what concerned him. It was where his friends were. Specifically, that they weren’t with him. 

Head pounding, he slid out of the cold bed and was thankful he was still in his uniform. And a touch to his cheek told him his domino was still in place. Strange, but he wasn’t going to say he wasn’t grateful. He explored the room without a doubt that there were cameras watching, so he kept his actions innocent enough. But really, nobody in the Justice League expected a former Robin to stay still in confinement. 

When the door opened, he braced himself. You have no emotional connection to these people. He reminded himself. Focus on finding the others. 

That was a little hard when the big bad Batman walked in, and Tim had to force himself not to react. It’s not Bruce. It’s not

“Tim.” Dick had said softly. Because it wasn’t Bruce. It was Dick, who was shorter, and leaner, and whose voice was unmistakable. It was harder to tell in the Batman suit, but Tim could tell.

“Where is my team?” He asked coldly.

“Contained.” Dick dismissed. Tim may not have expected him to be overly nice and accommodating, but the short Batman response still stunned him a bit.”They’re fine, baby bird. You don’t have to protect them anymore. You’re home.” 

“What?” Tim croaked, barely even hearing what Dick was saying. “No, I’m not home, Dick.”

“I know we’re not in Gotham yet. But you’ll feel better when we get inside the manor. Alfred misses you so much, y’know? And you don’t have to be a hero anymore, okay? I’m sorry you were pressured into it, that you felt like you had to run away to quit. I don’t care who you are, I just want you home!”

Dick was rambling. His shoulders were hiked up to his ears, his hands in front of him–moving too much to be compared to Bruce. He was scared. Tim knew he was. But a part of him didn’t give a shit.

That’s a lie. Tim cared a lot. He always would, he figured.

“Gotham isn’t my home anymore, Dick.” Tim finally said, angry but quiet. “My home is with my friends. The ones you took. If you really want me to be home, you’ll take me to them.”

Dick finally stopped bouncing, finally managed to still himself back into Batman. They aren’t under my supervision.” He said calmly. “Despite what you may think, this wasn’t my big plan to get to you. The Justice League captured you all earlier. I just vouched for you. Got you under my own supervision and insisted they manipulated you into being a rogue.”

“That’s not–!” Tim started angrily, but Batman held up a hand with a flat stare.

“You think I believe you to be easily manipulated? Of course not. I just said what I needed to in order to get you out of their possession. You’re the only with someone outside of that stupid group with someone that cares about you. The only one with an adult willing to bail you out when you’re in hot water. Shouldn’t that be worth something?”

Sounding exasperated now, Dick yanked the cowl down to look Tim in the eyes. It shouldn’t have made Tim as relaxed as it did. But seeing his big brother, nothing more, nothing less, than Dick Grayson, was never anything less than a comfort. Even when he saw the bags under Dick’s eyes, the messy hair, the desperate look on his face.

“I want to see my friends.” Tim repeated firmly. 

Dick deflated. Pulled up his wrist computer and typed at a rapid speed only bats and speedsters could have. “Stubborn as ever, aren’t you baby bird?” He huffed, a hint of amusement behind the exhaustion. “If I can even still call you that.”

Tim hesitated, hating the unsteady feeling in his chest. “You can.” He heard himself say. “Blackbird is my current alias. So it still…makes sense.”

The small but genuine smile on Dick’s face made Tim’s cheeks heat up with embarrassment. “That explains the tattoos, then. They look good. Suit you.”

“Thanks. Scarlet did them. She’s surprisingly good at it. Well, not surprisingly. But. You know what I mean.” Dick nodded. They slipped into a silence, as comfortable as it was uncomfortable. “It does mean something.” He added softly. He didn’t look Dick in the eye. “That you’re bailing me out.”

The faint smile on his brother’s face was worth the words. “Floor negative three, two lefts. Ninth door on the right. Passcode is Black Canary’s birthday–why do we still let Green Arrow set the passwords?”

“Aren’t you gonna get into trouble for this? Surely there’s cameras in here.”

“Like I’d let anyone in the Justice League watch over me having a conversation with my little brother.” Dick scoffed with a dismissive wave. “I disabled everything before coming in. You’re smart, Tim. Completely capable of taking me by surprise and hacking the JLA systems.” He winked, and Tim heard the door click.

He didn’t waist a single second more.

Thank you. He wanted to say. And I’m sorry I left you. And I’m sorry I’m doing it again. I’m sorry I have a new family. Thank you for accepting me anyway. Thank you for helping me go against what I know you want.

He didn’t say any of that, though. He went down three floors, turned left twice, and entered Black Canary’s birthday into the ninth door on the right. The click of it opening was more relieving than anything he’d felt in a while. 

That relief was quickly stripped away when he saw Cissie first, looking a bit beaten up. Not too bad, thankfully. The logical part of his brain knew she was okay and barely roughed up. But his subconscious still buzzed with worry.

“I’m fine.” She was quick to assure, standing up and brushing herself off. Each of them were standing in clear rooms, close to what Tim assumed he’d be in, rather than a med bay. “That door code won’t let you put a code in if you aren’t in the system, which is why I’m not out yet. The others have inhibitor collars on.”

Tim nodded, refusing to show the pleasant surprise in his chest. Dick had done more than he thought; as always. Tim unlocked her door, then each of the others’ not stopping until they were all unlocked. Cissie rushed into Cassie’s cell when it was unlocked, while Kon hurried over to Bart. The speedster seemed to be the worst off, from what Tim assumed was exhaustion, but nobody looked seriously hurt. Thankfully. 

Tim’s thumbprint was suspiciously able to unlock everyone’s collars, which he quickly removed. Once gone, Kon scooped him up into a hug, his face pressed into Tim’s neck. “I couldn’t hear your heartbeat.” He muttered, soft against Tim’s skin.

“I’m right here, buddy.” Tim reassured him, rubbing his back. “I’m good. Safe. Not a scratch on me.”

“Don’t ever do that again.” He said, and then he leaned down to press his lips to Tim’s, warm and perfect. Tim sort of lost where he was for a few moments until Cassie broke them out of it.

“Dudes!” She hissed, exasperated. Which. Fair.

“Speedster starving over here! Stop making out.” Bart grumbled. Tim winced sympathetically. Kon scooped him and Bart up before speeding off, Cassie holding Cissie behind them. They landed safely in the kitchen of the mountain, where Bart immediately raided the pantry. Tim made a note that they’d have to get groceries earlier than usual. He didn’t mind.

Chapter Text

“I don’t like it.”

“I know you don’t.” Tim sighed, not pausing his task of stocking his utility belt. “But I promise, I’ll be fine. There’s nothing they can do to me I won’t see coming. Gotham is perfectly safe for me.

The kryptonian huffed from his place floating a few feet off the ground, legs and arms both crossed. “We agreed on no solo missions!”

“Gotham’’s different.” 

Kon scoffed. “Hardly. Just because it’s your hometown doesn’t mean you need to go alone.”

“You know Batman’s rule about metas. He’ll sniff you out before I can even get to the docks!” 

“Then take Cis!”

“Fine, I’ll take Cissie! Happy?” 

“Yes!” Kon shouted back, his anger causing him to drop back onto the ground with an “oof!” He scrambled back up and stormed out of the room. Tim glared at the doorway for a moment before turning back to his belt. He didn’t understand why his boyfriend didn’t get it. 

Sure, going back to his former home would be tough; mainly because Batman–the real one–had returned to Gotham a few months ago.How, Tim wasn’t sure. He’d had theories, both before and after Bruce returned. But he had no idea what and wasn’t true.

Despite that, they all knew a former Robin was the only one of them who could get in and out without detection. Even with all the training he made his team do, nobody was as slippery as a bat.

Which was exactly how he managed to get to Gotham without any other teammates.

Being in Gotham again made him shiver. 

Not just from the cold, though that was a factor. He was so used to the warmth of early fall everywhere else, he’d forgotten that Gotham was cold almost year round.

The familiarity of his home town was the main reason for his discomfort. Nothing seemed to have changed, not that he was surprised. A part of him wanted to run across the rooftops like he was thirteen again. He ignored that urge and headed straight for the docks. 

Waiting for the shipment to come in was as easy as it was difficult, for the same reason. Robin training.

Tim was made to sit still. For photography, skateboards, staring at cases and waiting oh so patiently for someone to pay attention to him. For the nights he lied still in bed, or sat in the passenger seat of the Batmobile watching the city blur by. 

The memories made him restless, so he was relieved when the ship pulled up to the docks.

Quick as a bird, he ran through the darkness and slipped onto the ship. Security in Gotham really was an issue.

He blended in with the night like the bat he once adored. The job was done in under ten minutes, crates sinking to the bottom of the murk Gotham citizens called water. It was the leaving that became a problem.

“Robin.” A low voice growled. It should have been terrifying. Should have taken him by surprise, made him feel uncomfortable and called out. He should have ran the second the voice hit his ears.

Tim felt warm.

He didn’t mean to. But the undertones of relief and familiarity in Batman’s voice made something in Tim relax. The safety he used to feel inside the manor thrummed through his veins and gave him the irrational urge to hug him. To feel his hand cup the back of his head, stroking through his hair like he used to. To feel the soft rumble in Batman’s chest that meant fondness.

Batman would let him, Tim knew that for sure. He’d hold Tim close, and press a kiss to his forehead and make sure the chill in his bones went away.

He’d reached out for Tim, when he first came back. Reached out, searched a hundred places, tried to interrogate his friends. It was too late, though. Tim liked where he was. He liked the life he’d built. He made sure he couldn’t be found.

Tim was good at being invisible. Even to people who loved him.

“Batman.” He said cooly, shifting his weight. Defensive. Ready to bolt at a moments notice, like he was trained to do by the same man standing in front of. He probably should have left already, to be honest. It was idiotic that he didn’t. He couldn’t help it. “”That’s not my name anymore.”

The Dark Knight hesitated. “You’ll always be Robin to me.”

“I’m not a kid anymore.” Tim argued, trying not to tense up. Not to let his voice wobble childishly. “I turned eighteen while you were gone.”

“I know.” Bruce whispered. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for that, Robin. I wish more than anything that I could have been there for you. For all of you.”

“You weren’t.”

Usually Tim was good at staying calm. He had a good handle on his emotions, knew how to keep them under control. But now he felt like a ticking time bomb, just waiting for the timer to go off. He didn’t realize how much he had building up until he was ready to explode.

“I moved past Robin. Past Gotham. Past being a hero. I like this. I like my life now. And you don’t get to pop back in now to try convincing me to stop!”

He didn’t even have time to catch his breath before he was pulled into a hug. The armor should have made him cold, but Tim felt so much warmer in his arms. The wind no longer his his face from where it was buried in his father’s chest, and the Gotham chill seemed to lessen. He found his hands fisted in Batman’s cape, and he relaxed. He allowed himself ten seconds. Ten seconds of warmth, of safety, to miss and remember the life he had before. Then he pushed him away and pulled back.

“My name is Blackbird.” He said firmly, voice cold. Both of their attentions were then caught as a noise nearby. A rogue that needed to be taken down, his mind helpfully supplied.

Batman shifted his weight and looked back at Tim. “For old time’s sake?” He asked. The playfulness in his tone took Tim by surprise. He hadn’t heard it in so long. It was a tone reserved for his Robins. They were the only ones able to detect it, after all.

Tim huffed, amused. “Why not?”

“Tim. Timbo. Timmy Tam.” Someone was calling. Maybe. Was he dreaming it? Warm arms wrapped around him though, and those were definitely real. Real and familiar. He leaned into the touch, pressing his face into a shoulder, or something. One of the hands moved to his hair and he melted. He hoped they would keep doing that.

“Robin, get up.” A rumbly voice said. 

“That’s not his name anymore, asshole!” 

“Blackbird, you with us?”

“At least his heart rate is normal.” Someone said, and that voice caught his attention more than  the others. He turned towards it, despite his eyes still being closed. They laughed. “Well, was.”

Very rudely, one of his eyes was pushed open and a very bright light shined into it. His head split with pain and he cried out, squeezing his eyes shut and jerking in whoever was holding him’s grip. He was then yanked away from them, into the cold, and voices erupted into chaos around him. Wind hit his face and back, chilling him to the bone. 

“–think he has a concussion–”

“I don’t care! You have no right to–”

“Kon, grab Tim. He looks like he’s about to panic. Or fall over. Or both. Probably both, to be completely honest.”

Warmth once again surrounded him, more secure and strong than before. A noise may have escaped his throat, but he honestly didn’t know. Everything was fuzzy in his head.

“Shh, I got you, birdie. We’re going home soon, I promise.” The warmth said, much closer than the other voices.

“Take him home to what medical care?” Someone snapped. “He’s going to the cave where he can be treated properly. Especially if he has a concussion.”

“If he wanted to go to the cave with you guys he would have.”

“It doesn't matter.” The deep voice from before said. “He needs help. If you all want what’s best for him, you’ll let him get the help he needs.”

Another silence, before someone spoke again. “Fine. But we’re going with you.”

“Fine.”

Only about forty percent of that made it into Tim’s brain, but he wasn’t too worried about it. Forty percent is a decent amount. Good job Tim. Hopefully the other sixty percent was important.

Yeah.

Waking up this time was a lot more painful than before. 

His head pounded, his throat was raw, and his eyes felt like they were glued together. 

If he was still Robin, he’d guess he’d just woken up from a fight with someone really annoying, like Bane or Scarecrow or Riddler on a bad day. But he wasn’t Robin anymore. He didn’t live in Gotham, so what the hell happened to him?

He analyzed his surroundings without opening his eyes. The air was cold, but a blanket was draped over him. His suit was still on. He was disgustingly drenched in sweat, his front especially, where a small body was pressed up against him. Their hair was tickling his neck. SIlence.

Finally, Tim allowed his eyes to open. The lighting was dim, but he could see well enough. At least, he could see blonde hair in front of him.

“Cass, he’s awake.” Kon said behind him, a hand ruffling Tim’s sweat slicked hair. He grimaced, but Cassie whipped around and beamed, with Cissie pushing past her to get closer.

“This is what I get for giving you space!” SHe said, exasperated and irritated. “Really, this is the last time we let you go on a solo mission!”

“Yeah, seriously babe. When all the sudden I heard you screaming it scared the hell out of me.” Kon grumbled. Feeling a bit guilty, Tim forced his pounding head to turn and look at the kryptonian.

“Sorry. I really didn’t mean to worry you guys.”

“Well you did.” Bart huffed into his neck. Tim accepted the light smack to his chest without protest.

“Tim! You’re awake!”

Dick’s face was honestly not what he expected to see. He’s ashamed to admit he didn’t realize he was in the batcave until a bat arrived. Some detective he is. And past Robin, he supposes. But apart from that, the lack of a domino mask on Dick’s face is what surprises him more than his presence. He hadn’t seen Dick without it in a long time.

“He is, which means we’re leaving.” Cassie said coldly, helping Bart out of the bed while Kon gently guided Tim into sitting up. “He doesn’t have a concussion, and he’s awake now. We’re leaving.”

“But–” Dick started, before Tim held up a hand to stop him.

“No buts. We had this conversation last time. Gotham isn’t my home anymore.”

Dick frowned, but he didn’t look angry. Mostly just disappointed. Tim’s heart twisted. “At least say bye to B before you go. I’ll go get him.”

“No need.” Batman said from the doorway, voice cold as usual. Cowl still on, of course. Maybe Dick took his domino off as a spite thing. Who knows. Everyone else in the room frowned.

“Batman’s right. There is no need.” Tim said cooly, pushing himself out of the bed. Kon’s help was unneeded, but he accepted it anyway to make his boyfriend feel better. “We’re leaving.”

“Tim.” Brude tried, a bit softer.

“No. No more convincing. Not from you, Dick, or anyone else in Gotham. And especially not anyone in the Justice League. I don’t fit into this box anymore. And I never will again. I’m done, do you understand that?”

Out of breath from the exertion, he leaned into the arm Cissie threw around him. 

“Okay.” Bruce said. Calm. Laced with a tone of gentleness, understanding, almost. “I hear you, son. I won’t say anything else about it. 

Even now, as angry as he was, he couldn’t deny being Bruce’s son. Couldn’t let go of the weight it held. He just shook his head and let Kon lift him up, so they could fly back home.

Kon’s arms meant safety. They meant kryptonian-exclusive heat and a steady heartbeat against his ear and TTK protecting him from the wind. They meant he was going home.

“I was thinking about retiring.” Kon said casually the next morning. They all stared in surprise.

Kon was the first of them on this team. The first to live in the mountain, the one to come up with the name. The teammate who brought them all together, pettiness and anger at Superman fueling him.

“Not that any of you have to follow.” He quickly clarified, a sheepish grin on his face. He seemed a bit nervous, but it was clear his decision was made. “And I’m not going off to play superhero. Just, y’know. Settling down. Maybe Hawaii or something.”

They all exchanged glances, a bit speechless. As usual, Bart was the first to recover.

“Of course I’m with you, K.” He grinned, punching Kon’s shoulder. “I’m here because you’re here. I go where you go. Besides, the ocean rocks.”

“I could probably do with a little less danger.” Cissie admitted. She walked over to pull Kon into a side hug. “Hawaii sounds fun.”

“It does.” Cassie agreed, messing up Kon’s hair. He grimaced but didn’t pull away. “I could get behind settling down with my girlfriend.”

They all then looked to Tim.

Tim, who hadn’t put down his domino mask since he was thirteen, who’d known martial arts since he was kid, who always focused on the mission.

Tim, who believed he’d never put down this life, unless he died, because the world would always need him.

It shouldn’t have even been a question. He shouldn’t have hesitated. He joined this team for his friends. If he didn’t go along, he’d have nobody. He wanted to stay with them. So why was he hesitating? Why was it so hard to smile and nod and go to Hawaii?

“I know this is a big change.” Cassie said gently, moving to place a hand on Tim’s shoulder. “We can take it slow. We can go somewhere else. We can stay in the mountain and just stop working.”

“You don’t have to stop to stay with us.” Cissie added, also now standing by his side. Bart was hugging him in a blink, and soon the warmth of Kon pressed against his back. 

“Bat, hero, villain, civilian. We love you no matter what.” Cassie said warmly. Kon kissed his hair.

“What are you thinking about, Tim?”

“I’m thinking–” His voice cracked. He tried again. “I’m thinking I’ve been a vigilante for way too long.”

Chapter Text

The day was bright. Sunny. The air warm. Sand hadn’t always been his favorite. It was messy, and unstable under his feet. Now though, it feels good in between his toes.

Up ahead, Bart and Kon were already playing in the ocean. Splashing and laughing loud enough to hear. Cassie and Cissie were setting up their resting spot nearby, assembling everything together with ease. Working in sync as they’ve always been able to.

Tim was still getting used to being “retired.”

His internal clock made it impossible to sleep through the night, much to Kon’s annoyance, and he couldn’t get up at a decent hour either. He had no expectations, but relaxing had proven to be a near impossible task.

He’d started working at some computer repair place in town, just to have something to do. He also went to a clay class on Wednesdays with Kon, just because. His own looke like lumps while Kon’s were identical to the instructors, but he was cheating. So really, he was better at it. He went to the skatepark with Bart and took photos of everything on a camera he bought.

Getting to be a civilian again was nicer than he remembered. He didn’t realize how much he missed the casualness until he got occasional compliments and everyone in clay class knew his name. 

They got a dog. A big, white, fluffy stray mutt Kon decided to call “Wolf” because he thought it was funny. He was ugly and friendly and active and the perfect addition to their chaotic household. He loved the beach and the walks Kon took him on each morning and playing fetch in the ocean.

Tim thinks he loves the beach just as much as Wolf does.

Not just because the sand feels nice under his feet, or because the sun' s warmth is amazing on his face, or even because the ocean is always the perfect temperature. 

Not just because the teal water glimmers beautifully, or the stars shine brighter than they ever did in Gotham, or because he enjoyed how Kon looked in a swimsuit. 

No, it was because everyone loved the beach. His friends were always laughing, they sung off-key around the bonfire, Kon’s lips tasted salty against his.

He always ended up falling asleep because the beach had worn him out, and the sun made him sleepy.

The occasional bird that fluttered by, was swift enough to remind him of being Robin. When Bruce Wayne’s face flashed on TV. The dreams of his murky hometown. They connected him to where he came from.

Maybe one day, he’d reach back out. Reconnect. Invite them to visit.

But for now, Tim was going to enjoy his day at the beach with his family.