Chapter Text
“Seriously?! In what world would I ever be going out with an empty headed model like you ?” Luka scoffed, arms crossed. “This must be a universe where I got brain damage from all of Mom’s loud music.”
“That’s…kinda…. harsh , isn’t it?” Adrien asked, trying to smile.
“Yeah, well, the truth can do that,” Luka huffed, head shaking. “Honestly, I seriously doubt you’re even telling the truth. I bet you’re just lying to confuse me.”
“ Babe , really, I have proo-Agh!!”
“ Don’t -!!” Luka snarled, reeling a hand back and viciously smacking the blonde across his face and leaving a very prominent red handprint on Adrien’s cheek. “Call me ‘Babe’!!”
“...Lovers quarrel?” Marinette asked, boarding the Liberty. She had come to sit in on a Kitty Section practice, only to find Adrien sitting and watching Luka, with Luka bemoaning something or other as he paced.
To Marinette, it seemed like Luka might’ve been in the middle of redying his hair, as his usual cyan underlights were instead an orange-y yellow.
“ Hardly ,” Luka said firmly. He sighed, arms uncrossing and scratching the back of his head with a twitching brow. “An Akuma got me, and teleported me here of all places. Now I’m stuck.”
“Oh, no! We should get Ladybug and Chat-” Marinette began, immediately worried.
“Don’t bother,” Luka snorted. “There’s nothing they could really do. The akuma that sent me here isn’t here , so the ladybugs’ that fix everything won’t fix me . I have to wait for my version of those two to come to collect me, and I don’t doubt that’ll be soon .”
“Do you…think they will?” Marinette asked.
“Of course they will!” Luka said, arms crossing and looking sharply at Marinette, insulted with the implication that they wouldn’t come for him. “I know Chat Noir will! He’ll know I’m missing or replaced with some other Luka. He knows me.”
“Okay,” Marinette said, hands held up in surrender. “So, where’s our Luka?”
The current Luka sighed, shoulders lowering. “Gone. Seems the Akuma swapped us entirely, so more than likely, he’s in my universe.”
“And… this?” She asked, gesturing vaguely to Adrien, still rubbing his bright red cheek.
“He’s being a dumbass,” Luka said simply. “Dumbasses get smacked where I’m from.”
“Well, here, that’s called first degree assault,” Marinette informed him. “So like…probably don’t?”
“If he’s acting like a dumbass, I’m going to treat him like a dumbass,” Luka returned staunchly, absolutely unswayed, making his exit and heading towards the stairs that led to his (?) bedroom. “Deal with him yourself, I’m out of patience for his nonsense.”
“That looks like it hurt…here,” Marinette said, reaching into her purse and offering him a first-aid ice pack and hankie.
“Thanks. Also how do you fit everything in that tiny little purse?” Adrien asked, cracking the ice pack and holding it to his very sore cheek.
“Secret hammer space purse,” Marinette shrugged. “Every girl has one. Are you okay?”
“Yeah, he didn’t loosen a tooth or anything.” The blonde paused, his lips twitching slightly, leaning a bit closer to Marinette. “...I’m not used to him being angry,” Adrien whispered to Marinette, a smile on his face even with the haranguing the other had been giving him. “Isn’t he kinda…cute?”
Luka’s head shot straight towards Adrien from the stairs, somehow having heard him despite his whisper, eye twitching and cheeks inflating. “Who are you calling cute ?!” He snarled, immediately making a run towards the blonde and judo-kicking him right in the head. “You dumbass !!!”
Marinette was startled at the violent reaction, and more so startled when Adrien dodged the hit, leaning back and evading all of Luka’s next strikes, Luka getting angrier and angrier every swing, until Adrien was at the edge of the boat and Luka managed to punch him overboard.
That seemed enough to satisfy him, as he stormed off with a firm frown, grumbling all the way to his bedroom.
Adrien swam his way back to the front, crossing to get onto the boat again. “Cute, right?!”
“...Yeah, cute like a mountain lion.” Marinette said dryly. “I’m gonna tell the group chat that practice is cancelled because of Akuma Shenanigans.”
-
“Hey, Lulu. Whatcha got there?” Juleka asked as her blonde brother boarded the boat once more, though this time laden down with a couple bags, and a large canvas.
“Art,” He said simply, setting down the bags. “Since I’m stuck here for a little while, I figure I might as well make use of the time. In my world, there’s a mural competition going on, so I’ll just get in some practice. Working on a larger scale than just a page, y’know?”
“Interesting,” Juleka hummed, watching her brother setting up. It seemed very much like her mother getting ready for a performance, how he set things out, including snacks near his canvas, setting up near the stern of the ship and setting aside some of the lived in junk that dotted the Liberty. “Good luck!”
“I don’t need luck, I’ve got all the skill I need,” Luka insisted, taking out his notebook and starting to flip. When he decided on a sketch to paint, he put on his big headphones, and locked in.
-
“I’m just saying, I bet I could make this Luka fall for me just as much as my normal Luka.” Adrien insisted the next day during a class break.
“Isn’t this like… basically cheating, though?” Alya questioned.
“It’s not,” Adrien insisted. “Because Luka and I have a list .”
“A list?” Marinette asked. “What kind of list?”
“A hall pass list,” Adrien said, going through his phone for the picture and showing it to his friends. “A list of people we’re allowed to kiss if the opportunity arrives! We’re both allowed three.”
Adrien’s List:
- All Alter Versions of Luka
- Prince Ali
- Tom Dupain
Luka’s List:
- All Alter Versions of Adrien
- Felix Fathom
- Sabine Cheng
“Hey! My parents ?!” Marinette blanched.
“I have Daddy Issues, you know this,” Adrien snorted, taking his phone back.
“Oh yeah, your Mom is like, wicked hot,” Nino nodded in agreement.
“I feel like Mr.Dupain would treat me right,” Alya hummed.
Marinette’s horrified look turned from the blonde to her friends. “Not you guys, too!”
“You’re an attractive girl!” Adrien reminded her. “Of course that also means your parents are hot!”
“Who's hot?” Juleka asked as she approached the group with Rose, noticing Marinette’s disgusted expression.
“Marinette’s parents,” Alya, Nino and Adrien all answered.
“Mrs.Cheng is adorable ,” Rose nodded in absolute agreement. “Mr.Dupain isn’t all that bad either.”
“I mean, I’d never kiss a guy but like. If Mr.Dupain asked I’d at least consider it,” Juleka snorted.
“I’m gone. I’m leaving. I need to scrub out my brain,” Marientte announced, hands over her ears and still looking mildly nauseous.
Adrien turned to the goth girl. “I’m glad you’re here, I have some questions about Luka.”
Juleka shrugged. “Sure, shoot.”
“What’s he like at home?”
“Uhm…normal?” The girl shrugged. “Like, he’s more of a pen and paper artist than a musician, he paints with acrylics, I guess, but he’s not violent or anything around me and Mom.”
“A pen and paper artist and painter…I can work with it!” Adrien said, head lifting and looking around, spotting a redhead in the distance. “Oh! Nathaniel, got a second?! I need some recommendations!”
-
“Do you seriously think you can bribe me into liking you?” Luka asked, deadpan and unamused, shoving the plastic bag loaded with art supplies into Adrien’s chest. “Go away, you vapid little rich boy. You’re Juleka’s guest but that doesn’t mean I have to fake being friendly with you.”
Adrien, for a moment, looked crestfallen. “I-I just…Luka, we don’t know how long you’re going to be here, and all, so I just-”
“And don’t fake being concerned!” Luka commanded, pointing at Adrien’s face. “You’re so goddamn fake, it irritates me!”
“I-I’m not-”
“Liar!” Luka huffed, walking around the blonde, taking a green scrunchie from off his wrist to tie up his hair and leave the Liberty. “Whatever. Screw off you goddamn mannequin, I have better things to do than to suffer being around you.”
“Uh…dude, I don’t think you’re gonna get anywhere with-” Nino tried to tell his friend.
But the blonde had his hands over his face, his cheeks flushing pink with the wildest grin across his face. “H-he’s…he’s so cute, Ninooo~! I’m gonna die~!”
“It’s probably wise to just leave well enough alone,” Marinette said, a hand on Nino’s shoulder.
Nino just sighed, and left his friend to his fanboying, listening but wondering what exactly was so charming about being assaulted and insulted.
-
Luka had taken off his cable knit sweater, standing now only in a black tank top, his hair pulled back with his favorite Chat Noir themed scrunchy. He had his bowl of cherries right next to his bottle of iced water and his cleaning cup, smears of paint all over his palette as he worked.
Chat had been watching for the last hour or so from across the street as Luka painted, a feeling of deep longing keeping him firmly grounded to the rooftop as the boy who so resembled his boyfriend painted his heart out.
As downright adorable as an Angry Luka was…he did of course still miss getting his kisses in.
After a while, he couldn’t stand just sitting around! He had to at least compliment his work!
If he got a kick to the head for his efforts, at least he could quickly escape…
Chat launched himself from the roof, landing on the edge of the Liberty. “Nya? Put down your guitar for a paintbrush, Luka?” Chat asked, sounding curious and catching Luka’s attention.
Chat expected an attack.
He didn’t get one.
“Ah…Chat, I’m sorry,” Luka apologized. “I’m…probably not the same Luka you know,” he professed, setting aside his palette and brush to greet the hero with a smile. “But I’m really glad you like it!”
“Hm?” Chat asked, head tilting, taking a pace forward. Luka’s face was getting redder as he neared. “You’re just as beautiful as I remember, though?”
“T-that’s-!” Luka sputtered, red up to his ears, taking a couple steps back. “I-I mean-!”
Chat took a few more steps closer, getting well into Luka’s personal bubble. This was interesting, this was new ! Not even his original Luka had ever gotten this worked up when he was flirting! “Are you alright, Rockstar?”
Luka made a high pitched noise in his throat, a muffle squeak, sweating profusely, trying (and failing) to gather himself.
Having Chat Noir so close was nerve wracking, and him being so familiar?! What had this worlds’ version of Luka been like to get his intimate attention?! Having the cute feline hero so close was agony on poor Luka’s heart.
Then, hearing Chat calling him ‘Rockstar’-!!!
Luka was not long for this world.
“Looks like you’re gonna fain- Luka!”
The taller boy fell like a sack of potatoes, swirls in his eyes and foam falling out of his mouth, his face almost glowing red.
-
“Well now I just feel bad for interrupting,” Chat said after dragging the larger boy to a deck chair, getting a good look of Luka’s painting up close.
The scene was of Paris. Chat Noir perched on a rooftop in the foreground (though wearing a slightly different outfit, which had to be the version of Chat Noir that this Luka knew from memory), sitting on a ledge with one leg stretched out and the other curled towards his chest, awash with the warm golden hue of City of Lights in the background, the Eiffel Tower like a glowing fang out of the earth. The night sky was very clearly inspired by Van Geoff, as it was a swirly mix of blues and yellows behind the tower depicted.
It had a very otherworldly feel to it, as the sky was in that beautiful abstract sort of unrealism, while the foreground, and Chat, was seemingly more realistic, though his painted face was as yet unfinished as Luka seemingly sketched and erased and resketched his face over and over again, going by the eraser streaks anyway.
And, comparatively smaller in the background, was Ladybug swinging in the air.
Chat was the focus of this piece, and he had to admit, he rather liked it.
He saw Luka’s phone on the table where he’d gathered his art supplies, taking it up and taking a good…two dozen or so selfies from various angles, left, right, center, above and below.
‘There! That oughta help him with the face,’ Chat concluded, putting the phone back and continuing on his patrol happily.
-
‘I’ve been blessed!!’ Luka thought giddily, swiping through the pictures as he paced the Liberty. Chat had taken so many , and they were all gorgeous !
Of course they were, because it was Chat Noir and Chat Noir was the most beautiful thing that had ever walked the earth!!
He fell to his knees on the deck, flopping onto his back and kicking his legs, stomping on the floor. “He’s. So. Fucking cute !!” He squeaked, a wide grin across his face as he covered his eyes with his palms, phone on his chest.
Juleka just watched her very Un-Chill brother squealing like a teenage girl rolling on the floor.
-
“Whoa!” Marinette gasped. “Where did you get that?! It’s adorable !”
Juleka set the lid of her lunch box aside. “It’s Luka.” She said as Marinette took a couple pictures of her food. “He insists on making me lunch everyday and they’re always so cutesy .”
“Cute is an understatement !” Adrien said, taking a couple pictures for himself.
It was a cat themed chicken burger, with a bun that had edible markers on it making it look like a cartoon tiger, complete with little hotdog sections carved out to make ears on top and pinned there with little paw print food picks. Next to the burger was a garden salad with the soft boiled, golden eggs shaped like flowers with purposefully placed sesame seeds in the golden middles like on a sunflower.
“Apparently, this version of Luka just really likes ‘cute’ things,” Juleka said, taking the burger and eating its face first.
“ I’m cute!” Adrien insisted. “Why doesn’t he like me?!”
His friends just patted his back in sympathy as he languished, wishing his Luka was home…
-
Adrien sat on the bench, head bowed between his knees as he panted. Today’s fencing practice was not going his way, and it was clear to all involved that Adrien was off kilter, which led to many of them going straight for the throat (metaphorically speaking).
Trustfund kids were brutal .
It had been three total days without any hugs or kisses from his dear boyfriend, and it certainly didn’t help that he hadn’t eaten most of his lunch! His home chef knew he hated mushrooms, but they were out sick and the replacement hadn’t been given the memo.
Which left Adrien lonely, and more than a little hungry.
“Hey.” A foot kicked Adrien’s.
Adrien looked up, blinking when he saw the unusually sullen look on Luka’s face. “Ah, hi-” He saw Luka’s hand lift, and he flinched. “Pleasedon’thitme-eh?”
“Shut up , I’m not going to hit you,” Luka’s tongue clicked, annoyed, hand lowering again. “I was going to give you food, but if you’re going to be a jerk about it, I won’t bother!”
“Wait! Waitwaitwait!” Adrien said quickly. “I’m sorry, Luka! Forget I said anything!”
Luka huffed, and dropped the wrapped bag into Adrien’s lap. “Don’t think this means anything special , Agreste.” he insisted. “I did end up using some of the supplies you left on the ship, so this is just repayment!”
“Ah…? Thank you, Luka!” Adrien said, stars in his eyes.
Luka sat next to him on the bench, arms crossed. “Just eat, dumbass.”
“...So…you’re just gonna sit there while I eat…?” Adrien asked, perhaps a bit awkwardly.
“That’s my lunch box you’re using, so I have to if I want it back.” Luka insisted. “And don’t try to eat fast. I don’t want you blaming my cooking when you get a stomach ache later.”
Adrien just shrugged, and opened up the lunch box eagerly.
It wasn’t as cute as Juleka’s, but it was still beautiful for something Adrien was meant to eat. It was a slice of thick cut toast with the fillings inside the bread itself, making a firm seal around the edge so nothing would fall out. Filled with lettuce, tomato, a fried egg and crispy bacon on one half, and what seemed to be an egg salad with shredded lettuce on the other half. Also in the box was a handful of carrots cut into matchsticks, some sliced cucumbers and cherry tomatoes, with another section of the box holding something Adrien wasn’t really familiar with. Tiny golden balls, covered with white sesame seeds.
Adrien went for the sandwich immediately, taking the egg salad one, and biting into it with a happy hum. The bread was soft on the inside but perfectly toasted on the outside, so it wasn’t like biting into pillow fluff, and the egg salad was delicious! Along with the crisp shredded lettuce, Adrien was in culinary heaven!
It was gone far too soon, but he had a second sandwich!
He bit into it, and the fresh and still warm fried egg inside broke, it smeared the yolk within the sandwich and on his cheek as he took another hearty bite.
“You eat like a little kid,” Luka snorted, using the hankie he’d wrapped the box in, wiping Adrien’s cheek from the yolk.
Adrien swallowed, smiling at the small amount of contact, eyes closing and leaning into Luka’s hand slightly. “Sorry, it’s hard to control myself when the food’s this delicious, y’know?” His eyes opened, and he grinned. “You’re a great cook!”
“Hmph!” Luka’s eyes widened, and he swiftly looked away, though Adrien could still see his bright red ear. “S-shut up…I know you’ve had better, rich boy.”
“I’ve had expensive -er,” Adrien agreed, popping a sliced cucumber into his mouth. “But you’re still way up there.”
“Stop talking, keep eating.” Luka insisted, shoulders tensing slightly, still not looking at Adrien.
Adrien really hoped he hadn’t spoken out of turn…So, he did as commanded, finishing his last sandwich and the veggies Luka had so kindly cut up for him.
Food consumed, Adrien was feeling mightily better when he went back out to practice, and Luka left with his lunch box…
-
[A few days later]
“Chat! Chat Noir!”
Chat paused, stopping when he heard his name being called. Down bellow was an ever familiar face- one Luka Couffaine, though the yellower version who wore oversized cream coloured cable-knit sweaters and had an orangey-blonde dye job rather than cyan, which was pulled back with what he now realized was a Chat Noir themed scrunchy, black paw prints on green silk.
He descended. “N’yello~! Luka, you’re looking particularly adorable today. You alright after that drop?”
“Oh, yes, I’m fine. Thank you, for not just leaving me on the floor…” Luka said, blushing pink but keeping a noticeable distance between them so as to avoid another fainting spell. “I-I just, I have this kind of mild…condition. I just kinda drop when my heart is….erm…”
“When your heart isssss….?” Chat asked, grinning and leaning on his silvered staff.
Luka sputtered slightly. “You’re…. literally impossible for me to talk to,” he complained, hands covering his face again. He took a slight, steadying breath, then took out a paper-wrapped frame from the messenger bag he was wearing, holding it out in offering with a blushy face. It was smaller than the big main one Chat had seen. “I…I made you something. It’s not like…perfect, or anything, but I figure I should thank you for helping me with my side profile work and all.”
“Awe, Luka! Thank you!” Chat grinned, gingerly taking the wrapped gift.
“Just…just don’t make a big deal or anything,” Luka insisted, arms crossing. “I had to practice for my big mural and I didn’t want to waste the canvas. I’m basically just giving you my warm up so don’t say anything if it sucks, alright?”
Chat snickered, still so unbearably charmed by his sourness. “I’m sure it’s great, Luka-” He was about to rip into the paper to see what he’d been given, but the moment he began, Luka exploded.
“Wait!” Luka barked, looking horrified. “Y-you’re not allowed to open it until you’re home alone!” He said suddenly, and Chat blinked, his back straightening slightly with the sudden intensity and volume.
Chat blinked, and the horror on Luka’s face deepened. He coughed slightly, his cheeks deepening in colour. “The paint-” He tried, looking away. “I’m not giving you my art to ruin it, Chat. Even if it was just practice art it’s still art, y’know.”
Chat smiled, putting the painting under an arm. “Thank you, Luka. I can’t wait to see it!”
Luka was still looking away. “I’ll…I’ll let you go, now. I-I have things to do!”
“Of course! See ya around, Rockstar~!” Chat bade, leaping off with a grin.
Luka turned on his heel, spinning a few times and fanning his bright red face, trying to avoid another fainting spell before he continued on his way…
-
The painting was a beautiful amalgamation of all the selfies Chat Noir had taken, each one framed by beautiful sunflowers that were actually 3D, made by painstakingly layering paint onto the canvas then solidified with resin. It was amazing and beautiful .
Adrien hung it above his bed.
-
“Hey, Adrien.” Juleka said as she entered the room, handing the blonde a box wrapped in a simple cartoon moon-and-star patterned cloth. “Luka said I’m supposed to give this to you.”
Adrien blinked, taking it. “Thanks…?”
He pulled open the cloth, opening the two-tiered lunch box and finding two cat-shaped rice balls one covered in nori, with pieces cut out specifically to look like the cats’ face and ears so it looked like a black cat and one left entirely white with a winky face made of Nori, both of them resting on a lettuce leaf along with a garden salad. In the second box beneath it was rolled omelettes with a sliced fried chicken patty.
“I…it’s so cute…I can’t eat something so cute…” Adrien sputtered, head bowing slightly.
“Hey, look, a note,” Nino noticed, plucking the piece of paper from the box as Adrien carefully put everything away. “...I’m only doing this because I used up the rest of the art supplies. You’re a massive jerk for making me cook for you.” He read, perturbed.
“...Adrien, I can’t tell if this guy likes you or not.” Alya said, eyebrow raised.
“I don’t eitherrrr.” Adrien sighed, face to his desk and bento now carefully stowed away in his desk where it wouldn’t possibly spill. “It’s constant whiplash!”
Marinette just lightly pat her friends’ head, languishing once more and somehow for the exact same and entirely different reasons.
-
Luka was making his family dinner, it was a nice, thick beef stew.
He’d pack up the leftovers for lunch later on; something simple. He’d make a cheese, lettuce and omelette sandwich to go with it, one with brown bread and one white, and use his bunny cookie cutter to make little holes in them, and swap out the bunnies so there was a brown bunny on the white bread sandwich and a brown bunny on the white bread sandwich!
Why was Luka cooking for Adrien?
He owed that jerk for all those high end art supplies! That was it, that was all! And they were all so expensive , Luka would probably be cooking for him for a while! It wasn’t because Adrien had complimented his cooking and ate it all so cutely!
‘Adrien doesn’t like mushrooms, so I won’t bother with them,’ Luka thought, crossing the item off the recipe he was following.
-
On the days Adrien was fencing, Luka would hand deliver his boxed lunches himself, and sit idly by as Adrien ate between rounds.
“Bento…” Kagami noted, seeing Adrien’s lunch one day. It was omurice, basically an omelette balloon with its insides soft and tender, served over rice with a beef demi glace on top and a smiley face made with mayo on top, and served with a salad in its second layer.
Luka stiffened when she spoke, one leg crossed over the other and looking away from the two fencers.
“Hm?” Adrien asked, spoon still in his mouth. “Pardon?”
Kagami’s enigmatic gaze tilted from Adrien to Luka. “Are you practicing to be his househusband, Luka?” She asked curiously.
Adrien inhaled slightly. “Kagami, he’s not-” He tried to say. He’d entirely forgotten that Kagami was out of the loop on the whole Luka-swap situation!
And, predictably, Luka exploded. “A househusband?! For him ?!” He roared, absolutely incensed. “He wishes !”
“...I mean, kinda-” Adrien tried.
“You- shut up, dumbass!” Luka stammered, punching the top of Adrien’s head.
“Tsuntsun,” Kagami hummed, staring at the boy. “I assume there’s a deredere somewhere in there?”
Luka’s tongue clicked. “You might seem calmer but you’re just as irritating as that anime obsessed loser Kagami that I know!” he snarled, hand lunging towards Adrien’s lap and collecting the half-eaten bento.
“Wait, no, I wasn’t-” Adrien gasped as his meal was snatched out from under his nose. “It’s so tasty…”
“I’m surprised your hair isn’t in twin tails,” Kagami noted as the boy hurriedly packed up. “I bet you have a cute apron to cook in and a bunch of food picks in your kitchen. Did you agonize over whether you should use the heart-shaped ones?”
“Y-you don’t know anything about me!” Luka hissed, turning his back and stomping out. “Loser!”
“Kagami, why…?” Adrien asked, actually still holding the spoon he’d been eating with that Luka had forgotten.
“Marinette told me about the situation yesterday,” Kagami said serenely.
“And you decided to push his buttons because of that?” Adrien asked. “How did you know exactly what to say to piss him off?”
“He’s a tsundere,” Kagami said. “While I’m not exactly well versed in anime tropes, it’s a common enough archetype. Did you notice he didn’t attempt to hit me when he was angry?”
“Well. Yeah, I doubt he’d actually try to hit a girl,” Adrien said.
“I’m in my full gear without my sabre,” Kagami reminded him. “If he wanted to hit me without injuring me, he would’ve. Point being, he didn’t because he doesn’t like me.”
“Huh?”
“As an archetype, tsundere’s aren’t honest with their feelings. They get overwhelmed by them, so they lash out at the object of their affection. I’m willing to bet that you’re the only one he’s ever violent with.”
Adrien considered it. Near so far as he could tell, that was true. But he was clearly quite more interested in Chat Noir…
“What does it mean if a tsundere faints around someone?” Adrien asked.
“They’re in love,” Kagami said simply.
Adrien hummed, thinking. This was still Luka…even if he wasn’t exactly a musician, more than likely he still had Luka’s unique heart song ability and either wasn’t aware of it or it wasn’t as honed as it usually was. He wondered if perhaps Luka could still sense Chat in Adrien and vice versa, but was coping with them both differently…
Adrien stood. “Tell the coach I left early.” He said, heading towards the locker room to change. “Make up something.”
Kagami just hummed in acknowledgement as he left.
-
Luka had agonized over the choice of food pick.
Only because the only clean ones were the heart ones, though!
He arrived at The Liberty, his anger lessened but his embarrassment growing. He’d gone and shouted in front of an entire room of absolute strangers !
It was mortifying.
And now he had a half eaten packed lunch in hand he worked really hard on! Not because he cared, no! Because he was a craftsmen and took pride in what he made!
‘I’m not all that hungry…but I’ll probably just eat it and have a light dinner…’ Luka thought as he boarded the Liberty.
As he stepped on deck, though, the ship shifted slightly. “Hey,” Chat greeted, landing on the top deck, taking a seat on the edge. “How’s it going? Wanted to check in, see if you’re doing alright.”
“Chat-!” Luka’s expression immediately lightened, but he dimmed his enthusiasm for a moment, still smiling but with less explosive excitement upon seeing the hero. “Ah…it’s been…a not-so-good day, honestly, but seeing you has already made it so much better!”
“That’s what this cat-about-town is here for!” Chat hummed, striking a self-aggrandizing pose.
Luka snickered, and Adrien could feel his heart throb within Chat’s chest. It’d been so long since he’d heard him laugh …
“Uhm… say …” Luka said, fidgeting slightly. “Are you hungry at all?”
“Absolutely starving,” Chat smiled.
“I have some leftovers from lunch, if you’d be okay with it…” Luka offered shyly.
“Sure!” Chat chirped. “Lay it on me.”
He got to finish his boxed lunch.
-
“What’s it like on your end?” Chat asked curiously, sitting at the Couffaine’s dining table as he ate, Luka already starting on preparing dinner, his back to Chat as he cut up veggies. “I mean, I’ve seen you beating in Adrien Agreste’s head in, but from what I recall this worlds’ version of you two are together.”
“Adrien,” Luka scoffed. “He’s…in my world, he’s… frustrating .”
“Claws in,” Chat whispered, and was thankfully unheard and unnoticed as he detransformed right there at the table, listening to Luka’s rant.
“He’s a certified genius and top athlete, he plays rugby for godsake and he's jacked as hell, but he’s so accident prone with no actual skills, he might as well be certified stupid .” Luka continued. “The guy’s a literal chess grandmaster, top of every class he’s ever taken, universities are lining up around the block to try get him to go to their school, but he’s taken up cleaning duties for his classroom way more than he’s scheduled to because the people who were supposed to do it said ‘their grandma died’ or some other dumb excuse. Newsflash, Geek, his ‘grandma’ died five times just this semester! He has no backbone, and he takes it all with the dumbest smile on his face. I once asked him what his greatest goal was, and you know what he said?!”
Adrien thought for a moment. He wondered what he’d say if he was asked such a question by this version of Luka. “‘I want to be happy?’”
“ Exactly! ” Luka said, exasperated. “‘I want to be happy’?! Of course everyone wants to be happy, but that wasn’t what I asked! And then he has the nerve to just smile at me with that big dumb look on his face! Like he’s amused I don’t understand, like he was mocking me. What’s to understand?! And what’s with that as a goal?! Is being a total doormat gonna make him happy? Is coasting through life with his natural talent gonna make him happy?! He has like… no ambition!”
“如果有来生, 我还是会选择和你一起报税, 开洗衣店。”
“Huh? I didn’t know you spoke-” Luka turned, and dropped the spoon he was holding when he saw the blonde at his table, inhaling sharply.
“In another life, I’d really like to do taxes and laundry with you,” Adrien translated. “It’s a line from a movie you really like. Well, my other you. I never really understood it, but I think I get it now.”
“Wha- How-?!” Luka stammered as Adrien rose up from the table, leaving the empty lunch box where it was.
“Luka, the smile I gave you in your world wasn’t mocking,” Adrien promised. “He likes you, in just the same way I like you, because he’s seen how you are with the real version of him, with Chat Noir. He doesn’t like acting fake anymore than you do, and the fact you can tell it’s fake is probably why he fell in love with you.” He approached, pinning the other to the edge of the counter, which was mildly hilarious because Luka still towered over him in height. “His ambition is to be happy, with you .”
“I…I…” Luka’s eyes were almost spinning out of his head, his breathing hard, backed up as far as he could get on the counter without sitting on it, trying very hard not to touch any inch of the blonde that had him cornered.
Then, his eyes rolled back into his head, and he dropped. Luka’s legs fell out from under him and he almost took Adrien out as well.
“Shi- Claws out!” he gasped, catching the other with his Miraculous-enhanced strength as quickly as he could before he could smash his head on anything on the way down.
Chat Noir carried Luka’s dead-weight to his bedroom, putting him down gently, then returning to the kitchen to quickly and safely stow away what Luka had been working on for dinner, taking a moment to quickly wash and rinse the bento box he’d used before he left.
-
[The next day]
“You didn’t even wash the box right, you should’ve used soap so you just wasted our water. Guess I shouldn’t have expected a guy who’s probably never washed a dish before in his life to know what to do, though. Dumbass.” Nino read the little pink, heart-shaped post-it note that had come with Adrien’s boxed lunch. “Dude, you seriously just need to back off of this guy. I think this Luka genuinely hates you.” He said imploringly. “He probably poisoned that food!”
“Tastiest poison I ever had,” Adrien snorted, entirely undeterred as he used the food pick, red with a little heart shape on one end, to stab and eat a sliced strawberry Luka had cut up for him, before digging into the main dish of the lunch.
-
Adrien was all smiles as he exited Francois Dupont that afternoon. He was planning on going to bother Luka a little that evening as Chat Noir, see how he’d be acting now that he knew.
However, someone was coming right for him at a running start, speeding past the gates and towards Adrien just as he was about to leave the central courtyard of the school. A very familiar blonde that Adrien saw everyday in the mirror, though dressed with black, thick rimmed glasses, wearing tan khaki shorts, argyle knee socks, oxford leather shoes and an oversized jumper, with a big broad bandage over his cheek.
“Feli-?” Adrien blinked.
“You broke my Luka!!” He shouted, launching himself at Adrien like a rocket, his shoulder landing perfectly in Adrien’s gut to knock the wind out of him.
Adrien swore he blacked out for a moment, and when he could see again he was staring up at the sky with an identical face, full of rage, staring down at him with a fist raised. “What did you do to my Luka?!”
“And who the hell are you calling ‘yours’?!”
That identical face was suddenly caved in as a familiar shoe slammed into him, launching him sideways and away from Adrien.
And there stood Luka in his light wash jeans and cream cable knit sweater, hands on his hips and looking quite unimpressed with the blonde, putting the arch of his heel against Adrien’s head. “What the hell did I do to make you say I’m ‘broken’?!”
“Y…you said…” the other coughed, flat on his front as Luka lightly rocked his head on the floor with his foot. “M-my…nam-”
Luka’s brow twitched. “Because I called you ‘Adrien’ instead of ‘Dumbass’?! You- DUMBASS!!”
Luka lifted his leg, and slammed it down right where the blondes’ head was, as he quickly rolled out of the way before the hit landed.
The bespectacled blonde huffed, eyes wide when he realized the danger he’d only just barely squirmed out of. But his shocked expression melted into absolute joy, leaping from where he sat, launching himself to latch around Luka’s waist. “Much better! I’ve missed you!”
“The feeling is not mutual!” Luka grunted, smacking Adrien’s head with his knuckles. The blonde was seemingly not at all bothered by the strikes, smiling still.
“Dude, you alright?!” Nino asked, alarmed. Adrien (the original Adrien) had not yet peeled himself off the floor, wheezily groaning as he held his stomach.
“Oh, shit. I didn’t mention this geek does rugby, too?” Luka asked, attention caught when reminded of the injured blonde and looking worried.
“N…no…I don’t think that came up…” Adrien gasped, curled up on the floor.
“Luka!” Adrien (The Glasses-wearing one) called, letting go and getting in between him and his alternate universe self. “Luka, Luka, Luka! It’s been so dull at home without you, the guy you were replaced with was totally boring! I swear, it was rainy and grey the entire time you were gone!”
“Tch. Knowing you, it was probably perfectly sunny and you were just bored without someone to harass,” Luka scoffed, arms crossing as he looked down at the blonde, immensely unimpressed. “Did you bring their version of me here?”
“Mmhm!” Adrien nodded, stars in his eyes. “He’s back on the boat! So we can go home, no problem.”
Luka huffed. “Good. Let’s go then. I want to go home.”
“Of course! Just need…” Adrien’s head swiveled. He spotted a door with a glass window. “There! One moment!” He ran to it, starting to write on the glass with some kind of wax crayon.
Luka went to help the other (original) Adrien up with Nino. “I left a gift for you on the boat, it’s wrapped and on the easel,” He said, dusting off Adrien’s shoulder. "You know the rules, don't open it until you're home."
“I…” Adrien coughed, still very out of breath from the hit. “I can see why you…were so hard to start out…That guy can probably tank a hit.”
“And yet he’s still everyone’s favorite whipping boy,” Luka sighed. “Frustrating, get it?”
Adrien would have laughed if he’d had the breath to.
“Lukaaaa~!” Adrien called from the door, which was now open and glowing a pale rainbow spectrum, the markings he’d made on the door itself shining. “It’s done! Let's go home!”
Luka took a second to scuff Adrien’s hair, probably the gentlest contact he’d had with him the entire time he’d been there, and went to the door, walking with Adrien a hop, skip and a step behind.
When the door closed again, the markings burned off, and the inside was once more the empty science classroom.
“N-Nino…” Adrien wheezed as Nino lifted his shirt slightly, getting a good look at the massive bruise that spanned from Adrien’s nipple down to his waist, with a noticeable pattern that showed his ribs beneath the purpling. “I need your help, I gotta-”
“You’re not making it to the Liberty like this, dude.” Nino said simply, Adrien’s arm slung around his shoulder. “That guy might’ve done some actual damage. You’re going to the hospital.”
“But Lukaaaa~!” Adrien whined as Nino led him down the stairs where Nathalie was waiting, then shocked into action when she saw how short Adrien’s breath was, unable to get a true lungful because of how much his chest hurt drawing breath.
Nino helped him into the car and Nathalie shot off straight to the nearest emergency room.