Chapter Text
Olivia was up, dressed and ready to leave for work before Cassidy’s alarm had even gone off. She woke him, though, all the same.
“Liv baby,” He said, propping himself up on his elbows as Olivia flitted around the room, “Where are you going?”
“Work,” she said matter of factly “I shouldn’t really waste anymore days off by just sitting in bed”
Brian climbed out of bed and walked to her, touching her arms gently “You have earned the time off”
“I want this case over with Brian. I want to put the man who did all of this behind bars”
“And he is behind bars and Cragen is gonna solve it all, Olivia what is this really about?”
She swallowed, she didn’t wanna tell him that seeing Elliot yesterday had set off a new kind of drive in her. Didn’t wanna make him regret telling him to come over. But it had helped, she felt like all the dust had fallen, like a snake shedding skin, she was clear. She could carry on.
Albeit she couldn’t sleep in the dark anymore, and noises made her jump. A lot of things were still wrong but she felt better. Much better. She could do more good at work than just laying here in bed.
And she wanted to see Elliot.
He had promised to come back to her today and she believed him but she craved the chance to work with him again. She worked so much better with Elliot Stabler. So she had texted him, told him she was coming to work today and he didn’t so much as question it. He just promised to pick her up.
“nothing”
“it’s not nothing.” Brian snapped and then seemed to think better of it “It’s not nothing Liv, you suddenly just fine? Like that?”
“I don’t know what you want me to say to you” Olivia replied, looking at him with a slight glare
“I want you to talk to me!” He replied “Talk to me Olivia! Tell me something that’ll help you. I mean you were here with him for what? six hours? and you’re suddenly back and thriving, why is it you can’t talk to me”
“Oh Brian this isn’t a competition”
“Sure feels like one! Pretty boy-”
“Stop calling him that”
“Pretty boy Stabler comes back into the country and you suddenly seem like he’s the messiah. The prodigal son returns”
“Oh stop it!!” Olivia shouted “Stop it! This jealousy is beneath you!”
“Is it? He left you Olivia!”
“He came back”
“And he’s gonna leave again! He has a wife! and kids! What did you think that he would suddenly run back to you and leave his wife? If he didn’t leave her 12 years ago for you Olivia what makes you think he is going to do it now? He won’t”
“He’s my friend. My best friend”
“And I’m your boyfriend. Well I’m supposed to be Olivia but I don’t know anymore. I don’t know”
“What are you saying”
The door went, cutting into their shouting and Brian stormed out of the room before she had a chance to even give him a heads up.
Seeing Elliot standing there set Brian off again. “You have got to be kidding me!”
Elliot gave a smirk, slightly confused but he was usually quite good with making things up on the fly “Good morning to you too”
“You’re with her on this?” Brian asked “her going back to work”
“I think Olivia is a big girl and can make her own decisions”
“Yeah fuck you”
“Brian!” Olivia snapped “Stop it”
“I can’t do this right now”
Brian stepped back, letting Olivia go past “I can’t keep doing this”
He headed back to the bedroom without another word.
She should have cared more about this. Should have been upset about her boyfriend's reaction, but there was Elliot and the noise of the rest of the world faded into nothing.
“Hi” She smiled
“Hey, Did I do something wrong here?”
“No.” Olivia promised, “It’s just him over reacting, as usual. Don’t worry…Let me just grab my stuff”
“okay”
Olivia grabbed her purse and her badge, sorting out what she needed before following Elliot out the door.
Elliot drove them to the precinct “You know, he has a point, Liv.” Elliot finally said “It’s not been very long and I don’t think anyone would mind if you took some more time..”
“No, No I want to be doing something. I wanna see Lewis”
Elliot almost slammed the breaks “What?!”
“What? I wanna see him”
Elliot chuckled cautious “Why?”
“Because. I wanna finish this. I want him charged and locked away on death row and far, far away from here”
“Okay, okay, easy tiger. You can’t rush this. They are gonna charge him. He is being done for the murders of the women before you, assault of a police officer, attempted murder, kidnapping. I mean Liv the list goes on and on”
“Elliot,”
“Olivia, please, relax. We are sorting it. Cragen is sorting it”
“I wanna work”
“I know”
“I can’t be at home anymore. I have to do something.”
“And that’s fine Liv, you can. But you’ll have to deal with Lewis again at the trial and it would just be easier for you to just do something else right now”
She leant back in the seat and nodded, watching the window outside. Elliot put the radio on and it felt like old times. When they would drive to a suspect's house and do an interview. Or they would get lunch together and eat chinese in the car. Stake outs had been her favourite. Long hours with just him, watching. Waiting. He would put on music and they would just sit. She would often sleep, pulling her chair right the way back and curling into a ball under her jacket.
This felt like that. Like just another ride along.
She almost nodded off when they parked outside the precinct. Olivia hesitated before getting out of the car and Elliot waited for her to go first before following her into the building.
“You okay?” He asked in the elevator.
“Don’t start fussing again”
“Alright alright”
But he couldn’t keep his eyes off her. It felt just like the old days to him too. He looked her up and down. She had on a casual plain black pants suit, her hair loose and wavy.
She looked so beautiful, so strong and…God how he had missed her.
It didn’t mean anything, he told himself, when he stretched out his fingers, letting them brush against her hand as they stood together. Olivia twitched but her fingers flexed and suddenly her pinkie finger was looped around his.
Elliot smiled at the warmth of that touch. It did of course mean more than he would ever let on, He had other obligations and no matter how good that touch felt. Nothing would ever come of it.
but he’d be lying if he said it didn’t feel good. so good.
She walked into work like nothing had happened, like she had simply recovered from the flu. She hugged her way around the room and let her co-workers make a fuss. No one questioned the fact she was with Elliot, but he did clock a look from the new girl, Amanda. She looked between them and her eyes lit up in a way that made him nervous. Like she was about to poke a bear, or in this case, a traumatised Olivia.
Olivia saw it too, and wasn’t surprised when Amanda caught her arm while Cragen was talking to the men and carefully tip-toed them aside, lowering her voice for just her. She wasn’t surprised, she wasn’t used to having a girl best friend, but Amanda was the closest she got. She was grateful for a lighter subject than the ones that had been in her head for weeks now.
“So that’s your ex partner?” Amanda said, her voice thick with appreciation.
“Yeah. Stabler”
“mmm, Isn’t he a tall glass of something sweet”
“A married glass” Olivia pointed out, her voice sadder than she meant it to be.
Amanda’s eyes flicked back, shocked “Married? Damn you don’t strike me as the type”
“Type?”
“You know…To get it on with a married guy, like come on. I’m sure that rack room has seen some-”
“Amanda!” Olivia scolded “It was never like that”
“You cannot be serious”
“You look at him like he’s a snack in a basket”
“I do not”
“Really? could’ve fooled me. And he’s pretty smitten with you too”
“Rollins, he’s married” she reminded him, reminded herself. Olivia looked over and caught Elliot watching her, smiling as their gazes met. God she had to remind herself. Remind herself he was married and he wasn’t staying. It would only be a matter of time before he would leave again. Home to his wife and baby, away from her once more.
“Does he know that?”
“Stop it!”
Amanda threw up her hands in defeat, “Okay, okay, but you could’ve fooled me. Personally I’d get a hotel room and just f-”
“Liv?”
The girls looked over and saw where Elliot waited. Hands in his pockets, a small blush on his cheeks that told them that he had heard at least the end of the conversation.
“Cragen wants us to um..Give statements to 1pp”
Olivia looked at the ground “Now?”
“In a few, we can grab a coffee and then Tucker-”
He saw Olivia stiffen at his name “I don’t wanna talk to Tucker”
“I know but we-”
“Elliot, I don’t wanna talk to him”
“I know that, you think I do? Tucker is gonna throw every letter in my jacket out at me and some. Trust me liv, if anyone is in trouble here it’s gonna be me”
She shifted on her feet and looked at the floor
“It's five minutes, Liv,” Elliot replied, his voice soft. It was a tone she knew he saved only for her. It was like caramel, soft and warm. It was a comfort. One she had missed.
“Okay” She said willingly, finally, as she lost herself in his eyes, and as she watched him smile, Olivia realised that her feelings for him had never quite vanished in the time he had been gone.
She was, completely, unwillingly and recklessly, in love with Elliot stabler.