Chief Companion Chronicles (CCC)

don't be mad. i’m crack fic-ing way too close to the sun now…
but pls, indulge me just a little longer (not rly ready to say goodbye to this yet. and well, i'm a huge trilogy believer, so this is the last hurrah)
+ no need to check out the earlier parts of the series, but it does explain the way... they talk... and yep. though suspension of disbelief works too!
+ a bit of dark humor plz

Chapter 1: The Best Man

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Robby: Can someone explain this; Someone from night shift saw it; Not mad just curious; Everyone
Princess: oh no
Perlah: DON’T
Princess: TOO LATE
Perlah: No; Putragis ka; Princess!!
?: Putragis ka
Princess: IJBOL; ok so WHO DIDNT THROW THEIR COPY OUT
Robby: So it was u @princess
Princess: i disagree to agree; who snitched from night shift???; did they send those photos to you?
Robby: I dont know
Princess: ah so it’s dr. Abbot
Robby: Wait he knows abt it?
Princess: you ratted us out huh? @Jesse
Jesse: I swear I’ve never seen that in my entire life
Princess: @Donnie !! i knew it
Donnie: Ok no; Just no
Perlah: Liar; That’s your copy isn’t it @Cassie; I know it's yours
Cassie: oh so now its like a witch hunt? cool we were just friends like an hour ago; @Mateo grab ur torch buddy, youre next
Mateo: I would just like to say; In my defense; Thats definitely not mine
Mateo: Mine had colors lol
Robby: SO ALL OF U KNEW ABOUT THIS
Samira: chill 😭 NOT ME
?: I didn’t; And @Samira why is that GIF so long
Samira: LMFAO IKR?? its a whole movie
Yolanda: Never seen it, Dr. Robby
Heather: What’s the paper about?; Why is it such a big deal?
Robby: It says who is ur ER stuationship; They said it has questions and OUR names and pictures in it
?: What the hell
Yolanda: Lol
Robby: Whats a situationship
Samira: like dating! but make it emotionally confusing without the labels
Heather: Ah so it’s like one of those magazine quizzes; Pick A, B, or C, and cry at the result
Samira: SOMEONE SEND IT CLEARER
Princess: ok let’s just send it, everyone answer; @everyone
Robby: I dont have the full copy
Cassie: time to shine @Mateo; send the softcopy
?: Not to sound so clueless but; Why him
Princess: IJBOL; he’s our chief editor
Yolanda: Oh wow; You had roles?
Princess: of course, we’re not amateurs💁‍♀️; Dr. Mckay’s the insider. Perlah’s lookout (a bad one). I did the questioning; we had already disposed of those four exclusive copies; but apparently, one wasn't; @cassie ehem
Perlah: You're the one who basically confessed to everything!
Princess: past is past girl move on that's minutes ago
Cassie: come on, thats not MY copy
Princess: before you all get all moral about it; we didnt even get to make that many patients take it; and we did this on breaks
?: What do u mean by that; Patients took that quiz?
Princess: they knew it was a JOKE; we also chose the ones who have chill vibes; dw we're picky
Perlah: For legal reasons; All the information written in that quiz has nothing to do with me
Princess: coward❗❗
Heather: This is sounding less like a harmless fun quiz and more like a crime
Robby: Where r the questions
Mateo: Sry Dr. Robby I had to pull it up
Mateo: U all ready?
Mateo: Heres the first page
Mateo: Second

Princess: send ur answers, ill tell you the results
Victoria: A B B B E C D B B A
Samira: oh! so we’re really sending it; C C C B E A C C C C
Trinity: E E B E D E E E D E
Yolanda: E E C A B E E E E E
Mel: C C D D D D C D D C
Dennis: C A A E A A A A A A
Princess: everyone done?
Heather: B A A B A A A A B A
Robby: Ah u did it?
Heather: Why? Is someone scared?
Robby: A B B B B B D B B B
Dana: If i get anyone other than Heather, rig it; B B C B A B B A E D
?: Not answering; I can already tell who’s who
Dana: K chicken
?: FINE; A D A D A D A D A D
Victoria: Lol just curious, are we in it?
Perlah: Not yet; This was pre-you; Just the ones before you
Samira: HUH; SO I'M in it????
Princess: i mean u already answered; just a tiny tiny risk of being called narcissist if u end up choosing urself AHSAHSHAH
Trinity: Wait; Wdym "yet"?
Princess: the questions with u guys are still under quality check
Cassie: oh i thought mateo was abt to print them
Mateo: Yea; It's like my number 1 priority; Especially since Princess doesnt ask me abt it every 6 seconds
Princess: ohkayyy relax drama queen
Mel: Does it include me too? 😊
Princess: yes sweetheart
Mel: Yay! Thanks!
?: Can we hit pause on that for a sec; Just in case someone pulls a surprise and changed their surname
Yolanda: Oh god; Dont fucking propose on a group chat; Lame as hell
Trinity: 😭
Princess: IJBOL
Samira
Dana: Yes dont
?: IM NOT; I DID NOT
Princess: plot twist: the results page doesn't even include ur surnames
Robby: Oh so Frank proposed for nothing then
?: NO; I DIDNT PROPOSE
?: Where are the results..
Princess: so ur ER situationships are:
Mateo: And for transparency
Samira: ok first of all; thats like the most forced meaning of DILF ever lmfao; and thanks❤️ mine's so sweet
?: "Mr. Maybe-Soon-To-Be-Divorced" ???
Princess: hey AGAIN; we did that before their first day
Mateo
?: Knows her anatomy?; We all know our anatomy
Yolanda: Oho finally I can use this
?: ??
Robby: Rolls up sleeves dangerously; How can i make it safe

Robby: Whats this I hear from Jack that u chose him as ur best man?; @Feank
?: What
Jack: Whoops sorry, Dr. L; I mean Dr. Langdon; I thought Dr. R knew
Robby: Stop calling us that; And to think i had to hear all of this from Dr. A of all people; U chose him? Over me?
Jack: It's a profound honor to have been chosen as your best man.; Thank you, Dr. Langdon; Franklin, if I may.
?: Huh; Nope
Jack: Francis? Francisco?; Franck?; Frangelico
?: Frank's just fine, Dr. Abbot
Jack: Oh, come on. We're way past that now!; Just call me Best Man Jack now 👍
John: Yo why am I in this chat
Robby: Apparently youre backup best man if Jack said no
John: Woah; Best news I've heard all week; I humbly accept; When is the wedding
?: NOPE; No duties. No best man. This is like theoretical wedding prep
?: I just asked Dr. Abbot to be my witness IF it ever happens; To be present during the ceremony
Robby: Y them?; What do they hav that I dont?
?: Honestly?; A night shift and zero morning commitments
John: Hey; What a low bar; But true I respect it 😼
Robby: I couldve taken PTO
?: Not even a real WEDDING YET; I'm still preparing for the proposal; I'm just trying to be ready in case my future wife suddenly yells "Let's get married right now!"
Robby: And Y would Mel yell that
?: JUST IN CASE
Jack: Healthy mindset. Proud of you, Frankie boy 👍
?: FRANK
Robby: Look U two arent even close
Jack: We can easily fix that; We're on a 1st name basis now.
Robby: And let me guess; Mel picked her sister as maid of honor
?: Obviously; As her WITNESS
Robby: Y? Youre not having a church wedding?
?: Well we kind of talked about it, Mel and I just want it really private. No big fuss; She's not into the whole walk-down-the-aisle thing
Jack: Understandable.
?: But she said she might be open to it someday; Her presence alone would be enough anyway; Why'd you ask?
Robby: I dont know; I just had this vision of walking u down the aisle
John: Oh; Damn; that's kinda sweet
?: That's interesting; And unexpected; I kind of teared up a little
Jack: @Robby You sweet talker you; You once told me your dream was walking Dr. Mohan down the aisle.
?: Nah...; Now you're just trying to walk everyone down the aisle
John: Wow; He's just basically 🧚Aisle Fairy🧚 at this point; Kinda greedy
?: Hold up Dr. Shen; Don't call him greedy; But yeah you're kinda greedy @Robby
John: With all due respect; He's out here collecting aisle walks like; "You get an aisle walk! 🫵 You get an aisle walk too! 👆 Hey, you! 👉 Want an aisle walk?"
Robby: IJBOL
Robby: I mean if Mel wants me to walk her down the aisle too; If Im available; And if she insists; Sure
?: Wowwwwww
John: Wait; Just to clarify, theres no actual wedding planned?; No date? No wedding dress? No bouquet?
?: YES
John: Oh ok; I say let the two fight. Behind the hospital. 7 AM. No weapons 🙅🚫; Winner gets the title; Deal?
Jack: Deal
Robby: ?
?: NO DEAL!
Robby: U will regret this Frank; U will all regret this
John: Oh man; Come on. Me too?; I dont like having regrets 😞
Jack: Frankie will regret what?; Having a loyal, charming, punctual best man?
?: Oh wow; This must be hell
Jack: No no, it’s not. Don’t worry, I’ll protect you.; It’s the best man’s duty to keep the groom safe from harm
Robby: We all know u will; So what are u gonna say when they ask u to give the best man’s speech?; Whats Frank's favorite food?; Do u even know his best time on the track? What about in a marathon?
Jack: Wait; Is this graded
?: Ah; I knew I shouldve just asked my mom; Even my ex-wife would’ve reacted more normally than… whatever this was

Robby: This is what ure missing; u-shouldve-chosen-me-FINALCOPY-FINAL.pptx
?: Oh come on; Is that the powerpoint Santos was working on earlier
Robby: Yeah did it in 5 mins; She practically jumped out of her chair when I asked who is ready to piss off Dr Langdon
?: Why am I not surprised

John: So; Is the fight happening today; I think I'll be late
?: NO FIGHT HAPPENING, DR. SHEN
John: Ok tomorrow then?; I'll sleep for now
?: No fight happening EVER
John: I think you say no a lot, Dr. Langdon; What happened to yes
?: Yes and I are taking a break; It needed space; I needed quiet
John: Fine you're funny; Hope you have a quiet shift
?: Excuse me????
Robby: With what Ive sent, Frank's already regretting it anyway; Im the best best man
?: No best man. No wedding
Robby: Oh sorry; Didnt know u guys broke up; U were just flirting earlier
?: Jesus; We're still TOGETHER; Just meant we're not getting married yet
?: Cant do this again; I think we're running in circles
Jack: Not backing down without a fight.; I did my powerpoint all by myself, by the way
Robby: Yeah, right; Show it; If its in black & beige, thats Samira's template
Jack: Best template ever, FYI.
Robby: Calm down; Its just a template
?: Come onnn; Stop bothering those poor overworked souls
Jack: I only borrowed it in exchange for a research article; And I did the typing 👍; jack-best-man.pptx

John: Uh; Ok I just saw these messages; Now I feel like I have to give my own reason too
?: Christ; You really really don't have to, Dr Shen; Not necessary at all
John: Too late; Dont worry I promise I made it myself
John: why-me.pptx

Notes:

ok for princess' excel sheet: who is ur situationship (and BEST best man? lol)

Chapter 2: CCC (New!)

Notes:

click for the "shortest" yap ever since this is the last ch (unless?)

+ mel/frank, my first m/f kids (both older than me), you’ll always have a special place in my heart. like have u seen that bags edit. yeah, that.
+ to those who said they’re not into mel/frank and still read this: oho, you had me double-checking my tags. so... skeptics? here for fun? or trying to maximize our joint slay 💅 no pressure tho lol
+ just omg thank you. laughs, smiles, eye-rolls, i'll take it 💖
+ tried not to repeat a GIF, hope I pulled it off! - do not count abbot's!!! that's the exception
+ happy pride month!! dr. samira (the beautiful loml) and i are doing great! tnx for asking :)
+ kingdon week!!! so many good food. ty beautiful people<3
+ so, that's it. see you when i see you. excited for the mel/frank or king/langdon s2! again, ily all!

did you know:

- you can scroll the phone lockscreen up and down!?
- bonus: click / hover the fic title for a sneaky surprise! maybe save it for the end - but hey, if you’re excited, dive right in 😼 i’m excited to show you too!

hehe enjoyyy

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Monday, July 6

6:34

Coconut Mall (From "Mario Kart Wii")

Arcade Player

─●────────

◁◁‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ▶︎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ▷▷

Snoozing 0:30 remaining now

LIFE360now

Melissa arrived at PTMC Hospital

Local Quilt Guild[email protected]6:25 AM

Re: Orange Quilt Search with M & B embroidered • We understand this is important to you. While we may have similar patchwork blankets, we’re not sure it’s the exact one. We can connect you with a collector who might have leads.

Mel 💜5:13 AM

And finally!! I woke up earlier than you and texted first. I win this time. My first time! 🥳

Mel 💜5:10 AM

Good morning. Hope we both have an "orange" day today. Make the most of your day off! See you, will probably miss you!

new pitt gc - day shift5:00 AM

Princess guess who just finished the final draft of the new quiz IJBOL

Robby Did u even sleep

best man - gc4:39 AM

Jack sent an attachment

John Nah thats too much. Im taking my name out of the running

Robby - Work4:35 AM

Y do u keep delaying ur proposal anyway? Waiting for stars to align?

To-Do List:

Today 9:00 AM - Kids' day :)

Today 4:00 PM - Drop-off

Today 4:30 PM - Find Missing Quilt!

Today 7:00 PM - Pick up Dinner (Food) & Full Course (Mel)

Today 9:00 PM - Play Mario Kart w/ Becs & Mel

Today 9:30 PM - Pretend to lose (w/o them noticing this time)

Today 11:59 PM - Answer mood tracker / Mel will kill me

Language Drops4:30 AM

Drops...Drops who? Drop into the app and complete your daily 5-mins of Tagalog!

🚪 Outside is calling4:00 AM

Get out there for a walk, run, or ride. Open the app to record.

Yolanda - Work12:06 AM

Be serious. Don’t be that guy, Frank M. Langdon. Do you want to be that guy?

Frank's Mood Tracker

Remember to answer at the END of your day! :)

O - Perfect; G - Eh not good/not bad; B - Sad/Bad

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Mel 💜: Good morning. Hope we both have an "orange" day today. Make the most of your day off! See you, will probably miss you!
Mel 💜: And finally!! I woke up earlier than you and texted first. I win this time. My first time! 🥳
Frank: Good morning, pretty doctor; Miss you already 😔; Have u arrived at the hospital?
Mel 💜: Yes, here already!
Frank: Already an orange day, since youre happy you "won" this time; And that youre safe
Mel 💜: You always do this 🥲; I told you to answer at the end of the day. And never base it on what and how I feel.
Frank: But I told you, I think everydays an orange day either way. I mean I have you 🌚
Mel 💜: 🌝
Mel 💜: Liar. You're just too lazy to open the sheet at night.; Your mood tracker is so unreliable.
Frank: Idk why u want me to have one; tho its fun coloring something to check if im always mad or nah
Mel 💜: You only mark the day blue when you’re pissed off at something.; But right? I told you it's fun 🙂
Frank: Remember when you colored ur day orange because a man named Salad gave you a flower?
Mel 💜: The patient older than all of us?; A grandpa named Caesar.; 🙂
Frank: WELL; And please, Mel. Stop with that emoji
Mel 💜: Haha! I knew it, you hate it; But admit you like using spreadsheets now because of me.
Frank: And someone threatened me to use it
Mel 💜: Threatened you with a "great" time?
Frank: Will never tell...
Mel 💜: You do, I can feel your smile all over the way here.; By the way, what time are you picking up the kids?
Frank: Abby said 9 onwards is fine
Mel 💜: I see. Oh yeah, she told me last time to remind you to stop making them eat ice cream for breakfast.
Mel 💜: Hope you have a great time with them.; Sucks our days off didn’t match this time. Just send them my hugs and kisses; 🧡🧡
Frank: Will do. Send some my way too?
Mel 💜: Oh no. Looks like I’ll be clocking in soon, honeybunch.
Mel 💜: Before I forget, you kept playing the same song last night. And now it’s stuck in my head.; The worst part? Since it’s just instrumental, I can’t even sing it to get it out 👎
Frank: This one?; Sorry lol I needed it to stay awake while waiting for you
Mel 💜: Alright, forgiven. Just get ready to lose in Mario Kart later, sugar plum!
Frank: Hey hey, pumpkin sweetie pie; Dont talk to urself like that, cuppycake
Mel 💜: So arrogant, gumdrop.; I hate you, snoogums-boogums
Frank: Nah you dont, the apple of my eye; 😏; Jesus we memorized it at last; Remember when Tanner judged us for not knowing all the words?
Mel 💜: Yes. It still haunts me. He looked at us like this: 😳🤨🤢; By the way, Dr. Garcia told me to tell you to answer her texts or she'll "kill" you
Mel 💜: Don't worry, she didn’t seem serious!
Frank: I bet she was. But she wont do it; See u at home later, Mel; 🧡
Mel 💜: See you at home, Frank 😘

Yolanda: Yo, Ken. Don't answer yet. Let me talk
Yolanda: So I was on a date, or what I thought was a date; We were at a restaurant. I reserved a table!; I even asked them to bring out a secret cake halfway through; Like some dumbass romcom teen
Yolanda: I thought it was THE DAY!; We've been hanging out for months; She held my hand at the movies, called me "my person" at brunch, borrowed my hoodie and never gave it back
Yolanda: I mean, I did buy her those green little creatures she likes; I've got boxes of them right now; LOOK AT THIS CUTE LITTLE ONE with her little glasses and little laptoppp
Yolanda: So fuck yeah, I assumed we're together; Apparently I was starring in a one-person play called DELUSION
Yolanda: Then came the confession, or the attempt; The 3 words
Yolanda: Like you're any better? Didn't you tell me you said "I love you" while choking on water cause you thought you're dying and didn't want to go out with regrets?; So don't come at me with your emotionally mature relationship 🙄🙄
Yolanda: Anyway, the waiter goes "Hey you guys look good 😁"; She goes "OH NO nonono WE'RE NOT TOGETHER"; I was like huh... what the fuck huh; The waiter didn't even say "you look good TOGETHER"; He just said we looked good!!; "THANK YOU" was the only answer he needed
Yolanda: Then came the cake. THE STUPID CAKE where I had them write "I love you" on the plate in chsocolate sauce; cocolate; SHIT U GET IT
Yolanda: Before she sees it, I made a choice... The only choice; I SMASHED THAT CAKE; WITH MY HAND; Before you say anything. No, it wasnt rational; It's a panic induced reflex powered by shame and lactose; Then I told her "Ah sorry I'm lactose intolerant"
Yolanda: You're laughing aren't you? Fuck you, Frank Manuel Langdon; What is it anyway? Marco? Miguel? Mark? Mateo? Wait I think we already have a Mateo
Yolanda: Like look at her. My everything; She's so beautiful
Yolanda: NO; YOU KNOW WHAT, DON'T LOOK AT HER; YOU DONT EVEN DESERVE TO!!
Yolanda: Well, everything's fine. I'm fine ha ha; Just wanted to tell you all of that myself before the CCTV footage drops
Yolanda: Also side note: If you propose to your girlfriend, I will press charges; Just after pride month, hello?; Read the room!!!
Yolanda: You can have like... December; Or something; Ok so why aren't you answering
Yolanda: Oh right. You have a life, you and your sweet pretty girlfriend; Must be fuckig nice; But I'm serious, I'll sue you if you do it; I'm kidding but am I
Yolanda: Be serious. Don’t be that guy, Frank M. Langdon. Do you want to be that guy?
Frank: Jesus Christ, Yoyo; You were really out here fighting demons huh; Damn
Frank: That sounded brutal; Also sorry I knocked out early last night; Meanwhile ure out there living a tragedy due to a cake; And for some reason, you also ended up getting mad AT ME
Frank: Anyway you keep telling me not to propose; Like last June, I couldnt propose since it's pride month; Then last May, you told me its National Bike Month and if I'm not literally biking while proposing, I should just forget it; April... National Poetry Month? You implied if I wasnt a poet, I should just sit that one out
Frank: But I mean I know I'm no better, I used all those excuses
Frank: Btw, I really don’t even know where u got that M thing from
Frank: Seriously, Yoyo, you good now?
Yolanda: Fuck you, ER Ken. And you're not even here in the ER today? 🙄; And hey; Thanks for finally waking up from your heteronormative sleep; Must be nice to fall asleep next to someone who loves you back
Yolanda: Ok that sounds bitter but still true; And I don't need your pity; Why'd you ask if i'm ok? Do you miss me
Yolanda: Anyway, we're already fine; We kissed and made up like minutes ago; Our zodiac signs match. The stars had no choice; I just forgot to unsend all the messages here
Yolanda: But thanks for checking in, albeit LATE; Don't make it a habit though
Frank: Ok ok I messed up; If I could rewind the stars and rewrite that moment, I would have stayed awake
Frank: Eyes bloodshot, phone in hand, refreshing, waiting for your texts every minute
Frank: You deserved someone who would have been there to gasp in real time; I failed you I failed the cake
Yolanda: Oh god stfu
Frank: Yoyo; To make it up to you, Im going to offer you the most coveted position; U ready?
Frank: Yolanda Garcia; Do u wanna be my best man
Yolanda: FML; 🖕🖕🖕

Robby: Anyway look at this, arent I the best BEST MAN?; Look at that
Frank: MICHAEL; ROBINAVITCH; Wtf isthat
Frank: That photo looks like WE'RE the ones getting married; Like Im seconds away from saying I do and youre about to dip me in a slow dance; I mean love that our outfits match tho
Frank: But the caption below?? Hello?; Made it sound like ure the one getting married and Im the best man
Frank: ALSO WHY DID YOU MAKE ME SO SMALL; I want a re-edit; Make me tall, make me radiant, do better Robby
Robby: U ask for too much Frank; Look, Jake was the one who did all of that; Heres how I did it
Robby
Robby: Y do u keep delaying ur proposal anyway? Waiting for stars to align?
Frank: I told u; Im looking for a childhood quilt that Mel misses deeply; I made it my sign or like the signal
Robby: I get it; I also like waiting for the right time
Frank: Bro I mean; Do you even still have time
Robby: U calling me old?
Frank: You called yourself old. All by urself
Robby: U know what; I dont even want to be ur best man anymore
Frank: OH NO; How could I ever live; I was even about to tell you that I chose you
Robby: I knew youd choose me; Im ur BFF
Robby: And im a good dancer
Frank: Now where did u learn that? Samira?? Ur patients?; Whatever; Dana told me to stop asking
Frank: But hey; IF youre my bff; I'm your.....?
Robby: Best something; Best resident; Best acquaintance; Best with a space friend
Frank: 🖕

Jack: If there are even any doubts that I would not protect you, Franco; Allow me to obliterate them with this video of me training
John: Did anyone actually doubt 😺
Jack: See, Francis? I can make sure you're safe if someone tries to tackle you on the aisle. I won’t let anyone get close to you.; Wait, it's still sending
Jack: Anyway. I hope, Francesco, that you take this moment to deeply reflect...; To ponder...; To marinate in your indecision...; For your choice isn't just a decision.; It's a destiny, Franklin.
John: Nah thats too much. Im taking my name out of the running
?: Uh...; WHY WOULD ANYONE TACKLE ME ON THE AISLE; And there is NO AISLE
?: And... no need to make up names. It's just Frank
John: I think its good to be ready for anything, Dr. Langdon; I mean I dont have any reason to tackle u; But I can tackle u, u know 😺
?: No no, I honestly don't know; Do you plan on tackling me, Dr. Shen??
John: Nah
?: Wow; Thank God for that...
John: I mean dont thank Him yet; Still to early to know; too*
?: ? Help
Jack: I got you
?: Jesus; I think im slowly losing my mind
?: And pls stop punching that poor guy

Frank: ccc-mel-proposal-draft.docx; Pls tell me what u think. Be honest 🙏🙏
Heather: Wow Frank; It's good. It's so Mel and so you; I mean, I’d probably want to get proposed to with something a little less sappy (maybe skywriting or a flash mob?); But Mel? Mel would absolutely love this
Frank: Thanks, Heather. Appreciate it
Heather: You’re such a sappy guy; Makes me wonder how you managed to fumble your first marriage if you’re this sweet and thoughtful 😏
Frank: OKAYYYY 👏👏 pack it up
Heather: 😂; But thanks for trusting me with that. It’s really beautiful, Frank; Wishing you both so much happiness
Frank: Thanks again
Heather: How’s the search for the quilt, btw?
Frank: Still going!; Someone emailed me. But they more or less just said they dont have it
Heather: You mentioned it's orange right? I noticed the lamp lava Mel looks at on her phone is orange; I guess the color calms her
Frank: Yeah. It does. But she's looking at it today? Is she ok? Did something happen?
Heather: No, not today, lover boy. I just happened to notice it back then lol; Calm down ✋
Frank: Ok ok; But its rly tough finding an old quilt with such unique embroidery, I'm not giving up tho
Frank: The one Dana suggested texted me yesterday to help look, wish me luck
Heather: No need! You’ll find it! 💪; It’s been a year, right? Universe rewards the hard workers
Frank: Oh, so you’re feeling sweet today, huh?; Robby behaving himself?
Heather: Whatever
Frank: Lol; Love ya, H
Heather: Sappy guy!!; Kidding; Love ya bud x

Mel's Quilt Recovery Log

	Shop / Seller	Source / Clue	Notes / My Findings	Status / Date
1	Mel mentioned the quilt in passing, something about maybe putting it in a donation box by mistake during the move	"Orange patchwork quilt... purple flowers... lines weaving in every orange color... M&B stitched at the bottom"	She looks like she loved that quilt. I’ll find it for her	Mentioned it on our first date Sep 13, 2024
2	~~Cozy Cottage Vintage~~	A blog post from 2020	Beautiful orange quilt but no initials. Suggested estate sales nearby	Visited Sep 15, 2024 - No match
3	~~Antique & Flea Market~~	Guy from hospital parking lot who was wearing a knitted scarf	Several patchwork blankets, no "M & B" embroidery. Vendor said similar quilt sold last summer (not 100% sure)	Visited Oct 1, 2024 - No match
4	Estate Auction House	Grandmother who was hospitalized for a broken hip	Quilt with leaves embroidery sold recently. Left contact info, no reply yet.	Contacted Oct 20, 2024 - Pending
5	~~Handmade Heirloom~~	Etsy Lead: Seller from Ohio	Not available (I mean, I'm sure it's not even the same. Still not bad to try)	Contacted Nov 14, 2024 - No match
6	~~Charity Shop~~	Bulletin board post-it	Stack of old quilts, no markings. Seller said it didn’t look familiar, but they have a lot and promised to keep an eye out	Follow-up scheduled Nov 28, 2024 - No match
7	~~Antique Vendor~~	Woman at church rummage sale	Faded patchwork quilt with embroidered initials. Weren’t sure if it's orange to begin with. Scheduled for a closer inspection soon	Inspection done Dec 9, 2024 - No match
8	Flea Market Vendor #15	Napkin sketch from Dana	No quilts currently but checks weekly. Left phone number	Monitoring Dec 17, 2024
9	Online Marketplace	Late-night Reddit thread	Secondhand quilt listed. Messaged sellers to ask about initials. Monitoring new listings daily	Monitoring Jan 8, 2025
10	~~Patch & Past - Vintage Finds~~	Clue scribbled by the patient	Old quilts, no initials. Owner gave lead to local collector	Contacted Jan 30, 2025 - Never replied
11	~~East End Flea Market~~	Word of mouth from Princess	Patchwork blankets, none with "M&B"	Visited Feb 5, 2025 - No match
12	~~Second Stitch Finds~~	Tip from old patient's granddaughter	Patchwork quilts without embroidery. Suggested checking quilt guild (Wtf is that)	Visited Feb 16, 2025 - No match
13	~~The Cozy Curio~~	Quilt guild (they're pretty nice people)	The group makes quilts by hand and kindly invited me to join. Politely declined	Visited Mar 11, 2025 - No match
14	Local Quilt Guild	Another group of quilters	Discovered they're a separate quilting group. Learned that quilt competitions exist	Follow-up Apr 14, 2025 - Pending
15	~~Just Another Flea Market (That's the name)~~	Someone from night shift	None. Will I ever find it?	Visited May 20, 2025 - No match
16	~~FruitfulFabrics~~	Online forum lead	No orange patterns, no embroidery	Contacted June 13, 2025 - No match
17	~~Donation bin by the grocery lot~~	I was just there	Well. I tried	Visited June 27, 2025 - No match
18	FLEA MARKET VENDOR #15 (Dana)	Texted again	Said they found an orange quilt with "M&B". In bad condition. Will go and buy immediately.	Pending (Hopefully a match)

Princess: guess who just finished the final draft of the new quiz IJBOL
Robby: Did u even sleep
Princess: let's not ask questions we don't want the answer to; so; already asked the ones who are already here for their answers
Princess: @Frank; since you're the only one who isnt here... for fairness, here, answer this too; @mateo
Mateo
Mateo
Princess: you only have 5 mins!!!!
Frank: Im being timed??
Princess: yeah, so i can send the results already COME ON COMEONCOMEON; dont overanalyze it, i know u will look for the ones with Dr. K

Frank: C B B B A D B B B C
Princess: okayyyyyy so ur ER situationships are:
Mateo: @Princess; Dr. Shamsi almost saw the printed one earlier, my heart dropped; I'm not doing any of these anymore
Mateo: I'm serious. This is my last one
Princess: yas deaaar; we heard u the first time earlier

Frank: Finally with the kids; Out of the blue, they said they miss “the sweet and pretty girl with the braid"
Frank: I wish that means me, but I'm pretty sure they meant you, Mel; Well, they even kept yelling "Mel! Mel!" afterwards
Mel 💜: Aww, seriously? That’s so sweet!; Tell them I said hi and that I’ve been thinking about them!!
Frank: Got you
Frank: Ate breakfast; And THEN... 😅; They got the fruit flavor, so thats healthy right
Mel 💜: Uh 😄
Mel 💜: Wait. Does that mean no more ice cream tonight?
Frank: Mel, there’s always room for ice cream 🍦🍦
Mel 💜: Haha; Of course there is
Mel 💜: Ate lunch?; I took a quick one but had to stop. Had a patient I needed to resuscitate; We saved her, thankfully. I'll tell you more about it later?
Frank: Of course, you can tell me everything about it later; And yes, we alr ate
Frank: We also went for a little road trip. No complaints so far 😊
Mel 💜: Good job, Papa Frank! 👏
Frank: Papa Frank, huh?
Mel 💜: Oh! Sorry 😂 One of the patients kept calling for her dad "Papa, Papa!"; It was the cutest thing!
Frank: Bet it was 😊
Frank: Dropping them off soon; They made me pinky promise to bring you next time; So if you still want me to keep my pinky finger safe...; that means you absolutely have to be there
Mel 💜: Oh no, that sounds a little like pinky finger blackmail; Sorry, I think I'll have to report this to HR... or maybe just trade you a thumb instead? 👍
Frank: How about ur ring finger?
Mel 💜: Well, I might need it though. 🤔; But since you're the one who asked, I could always let you borrow it sometime?
Frank: Deal
Mel 💜: Hey Dana, here’s what I have so far. Do you think it needs changes? It feels a bit confusing. I’m not sure he’ll get it, and honestly, I’m a little lost myself. I feel like he’d have to read my mind to get it. 🥲; unfinished-frank.xlsx
Mel 💜: Shit; You didn't see that, right?; I mean you must be driving right now
Frank: Sorry baby, you named it Unfinished Frank and said it "needs changes" and "not sure he'll get it"; I can't not open it
Mel 💜: I knew it.; Fine. You can look at it. Just don't answer it yet, okay? It's really not done.
Frank: It's all good, no problem; Whatever you need
Frank: Are you making a crossword puzzle?
Mel 💜: I figured you like them; I tried making a customized one for you, but it's kind of difficult
Frank: I don't like to do this just over a text; And I know I'll see you later. But just know I love you more and more each day, yeah?
Mel 💜: Same here. But more 🙂; Dr. Collins saw your text and she shouted "Aha! Sappy guy!"
Frank: Tell her to stop snooping and hovering over others' phones
Mel 💜: She said she learned this from you. Haha
Frank: Ah; She kinda got me there; I'll pick you up later, okay? Stay safe, Mel
Mel 💜: Can't wait! You too.

Unfinished Frank's Crossword Puzzle

I THINK IT'S TOO CONFUSING. REVISE?!

A	B	C	D	E	F	G	H	I	J	K	L	M	N	O	P	Q	R
0
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

	DOWN	ACROSS
(first: # horizontal - 2nd: letter vertical)	1-E. The person spoken to (12th) 3-D. Citrus fruits or color (6th) 3-I. Sad feelings or color (9th) 3-L. Reflective surface (1st) 3-Q. Honest, direct, open, and the love of my life (15th) 6-G. Refers to self (14th) 8-B. Preposition indicating direction (2nd)	1-D. Belonging to me (3rd) 3-C. Spiritual essence (4th) 4-G. Expresses future tense or a document (11th) 4-N. To wed (13th) 5-D. Connects words (8th) 6-I. All things; You to me (10th) 7-D. Leafy vegetables or color (7th) 8-B. Definite article (5th)

DOWN

ACROSS

(first: # horizontal - 2nd: letter vertical)

1-E. The person spoken to (12th)

3-D. Citrus fruits or color (6th)

3-I. Sad feelings or color (9th)

3-L. Reflective surface (1st)

3-Q. Honest, direct, open, and the love of my life (15th)

6-G. Refers to self (14th)

8-B. Preposition indicating direction (2nd)

1-D. Belonging to me (3rd)

3-C. Spiritual essence (4th)

4-G. Expresses future tense or a document (11th)

4-N. To wed (13th)

5-D. Connects words (8th)

6-I. All things; You to me (10th)

7-D. Leafy vegetables or color (7th)

8-B. Definite article (5th)

Jack: Hello.; Why are people texting me about a fire? 🔥
?: THERE'S A FIRE?; AT THE ER??
Robby: Theres no fire
Jack: Don't lie to me. I know there is.
Robby: Ok a small one; But its fine
?: FIRE???
Robby: Im just kidding; No fire
Jack: You already there? @John; Is there a fire?
John: Lol yea there is; All chill tho
?: Chill???
Robby: Stop panicking, its nothing; We r all ok

Cassie: so i can't keep telling this story over and over again; but i know everyone will ask, i'm just gonna say it here; @everyone; yes. frank ran in, holding a bouquet, killed the smallest fire i've ever seen with that same bouquet 💐
Princess: woah; rare dr langdon W
Cassie: can someone inform Whitaker his air fryer is now dead and gone??
Cassie: we think "something" is still living here inside the hospital; it must've been chewing on the air fryer wiring which caused the fire
Trinity: No, Dr. McKay; Whitaker doesn't live there anymore
Robby: ?
Robby: What do u mean by that; Dr Trinity; Santos
Robby: Dr Santos; @Trinity; I saw ur message; Didanyone else see it
Trinity: Idk what u mean
Robby: About Whitaker; Doesnt live where anymore?
Trinity: Live where; ?
Robby: ???
Trinity: ?
Yolanda: ??; I didn't see anything
Trinity: Same 👍
Robby: ?
Cassie: anyways... for some reason, im the one holding the bouquet now; brb
Perlah: He swore in Tagalog; @Princess; Get out of here, it's funny
Princess: aha!!!; i knew it. told you i noticed he was trying to listen in on our convos last time
Cassie: @everyone this is not an emergency; but everyone who's available, please get out; get the fuck out of here RIGHT NOW
Dana: You ok, Cass?
Princess: she's fine she's fine; we just think he's going to go on one knee soon
Samira: omfg??????
Yolanda: He's doing it now?; Wow I’m going to sue the fuck out of you @Frank; On my way
Trinity: Can someone stop him?; We're alr like 10 mins away
John: @Trinity I can tackle him?
Jack: DO NOT TACKLE THE GROOM @John
John: Ok bet
Samira: I CANT; PLS CAN SOMEONE TAKE A VDIEO
Dana: @Robby come out right now; Can someone grab Robby?
Robby: Y; The fire's out
Dana: There r so many petals on the ground; Frank's gonna do it
Dana: Can u just go outside; Nownow now
Robby: Huh hes gonna propose now outside the hospital?; Y now?
Robby: Surely he could wait to reserve a restaurant; Theres such a thing as perfect timing
Heather: I'll grab him @Dana; So he found the quilt huh
Perlah: Ah 😂 so that's a quilt they're holding; I thought it's like a baby making blanket
Princess: PAUSE; is he also crying????
Samira: HE IS? AND IM NOT THERE TO SEE IT???
Princess: he's doing a big speech right now, like how he can't wait a minute longer; how there are so many unsure days, unsure things in life; ....like a fire
Robby: The smallest fire; From an air fryer; I told him not to panic
Heather: Mike please; Let's just go outside
Robby: Ok; Already walking towards u
Princess: oh it's happening!!!!!!!!!!; to those who have patients right now, sucks to be u ig
Samira: someone take a videoooooo; PLEASEEEE
Princess: dr samira, ur shift is already up like 50 mins ago.....; clock out NOW
Samira
Parker: Just arrived; Thanks guys for the context
John: POV: you show up early for night shift expecting peace and iced coffee instead the toilet won’t flush then the break room smells like someone deep-fried their soul in an air fryer and set it on fire. like who even brings an air fryer to a hospital? they called it a “small fire” yeah right like nearly torching the room's just a light snack
John: then you spot rose petals like someone tried to be romantic but gave up halfway. you follow the trail outside where it’s drizzling and coworkers are cheering like they won the lottery but nope, just a parking lot proposal in soggy scrubs
John: now you’re also soaking wet clutching now-warm iced coffee wondering who picked the parking lot for this but hey those are the people you almost had to be best man for so you zip it and head back inside. but inside, you feel like this:
Emery: Ah; Ok; Been waiting so long to drop that one, huh?
Mateo
Parker: Right?; YEAHHHH let's wake that up; I once told him that too
John: There are many types of POVs
Emery: ...; Yeah no; We just finished the 1v100 debate, please let's NOT do another one
Samira: sorry to interrupt; did anyone get the video of the proposal
Yolanda: Not me; Sorry
Trinity: Already done when we got back
Princess: i got a scuffed photo 😭 it all happened too fast; sorryyyy dr mohan
Robby: I tried to get one, but its just pitch black; Idk why
Heather: Yeah you must've covered the camera with your hands. Again
Samira: NOOOOOOOOOOO
Jack: Didn’t get to see it either.; But congrats, Franklin and Melody. Proud of you two. You two make a great couple!
Samira: franklin and melody...
Jack: Also, I think there was also another proposal in the PTMC forum. I guess we’ll just have to live with this:; Case: Counterpart-Compass (CCC) ptmc.com
Samira: wait........ that's THEIR usernames, right?; can someone pls confirm
Yolanda: Yes, confirmed
Cassie: yup thats them
Samira: OMG not now sweetie!!! mommy's reading a ccc proposal
?: How did u see it so fast? @Jack It just got posted
Jack
?: You have ur own GIF??
Jack: By the way, you think Gloria's gonna ask us about this online post again? @Robby; Theres no way it traces back to us, right?
John: She’s gonna be pissed when she finds out about the fire anyway lol
Robby: Small fire
John: Right; 👍
Robby: Honestly I think its worth it for the people I will walk down the aisle; Ill just tell Gloria that its me who wrote it again
Jack: I don't know about that one, brother.; I don’t think you want Gloria thinking you proposed to someone on the forum. But maybe that's just me?
Robby: IJBOL
?: You totally just imagined yourself walking Gloria down the aisle, didnt you @Robby
John: 🧚 Aisle Fairy 🧚
Robby

  Forums > Subforum > Sub-Subforum

PTMC - Consults, Conundrums & Curious Cases (CC&CC)

RatchetSassy

Mon, 22:30

Case: Counterpart-Compass (CCC)

For the sake of clarity, this case study is not for formal submission and should be approached with a blend of earnestness, humor, and cosmic wonder. Any literal conclusions are warmly encouraged.

Chief Complaint: Subject reports a persistent and growing obsession with a certain human being, characterized by an uncontrollable urge to smile like a goofball, random daydreaming episodes starring the other person as co-lead, and an alarming increase in heart rate whenever proximity occurs.

Side effects include spontaneous laughter and smiles, sudden bouts of courage to ask big questions, and occasional attempts at poetic declarations.

Draft ICD-10 Codes (NOT open for validation):

CCC.01 - Compass Alignment Phase (Mild): "That moment the internal compass locks onto the one."
CCC.02 - Shared Course Calibration (Moderate): "Intentional syncing of hearts, dreams, and snack preferences."
CCC.03 - Joint Navigation Readiness (Severe): "Readiness to map a lifelong journey together."
CCC.89 - Other Specified Cosmic Bonds: (e.g., perfectly timed shared glances, synchronized smiles, unspoken understanding)
CCC.99 - Unspecified but Undeniable Connection: "Still marveling at how stars conspired to bring you here."

History of Present Illness:

Approximately [X months/years] ago, the subject encountered their Counterpart: a burst of sunlight in a sky that had long been gray. Initial signs were subtle: lingering glances, laughter that caught in the throat, and a deepening comfort in shared quiet moments. Over time, these small moments became deliberate choices and regular habits: long talks, mutual care rituals, and dreaming aloud about futures together.

This has deepened into a stable state of mutual alignment, marked by a sense of direction that feels both personal and shared.

Exhibits (not subject to critique):

Exhibit A: The Smile That Rerouted Plans (CCC.01)

A single smile recalibrates the internal compass toward the soul's reflection.

Exhibit B: Midnight Compass Adjustments (CCC.02)

Late-night conversations filled with laughter, hopes, and the occasional debate over snack choices or what to order for dinner.

Exhibit C: The Hydration Phenomenon (CCC.02)

Thoughtful offers of water, symbolizing care, attentiveness, and quiet devotion.

Exhibit D: The Language of Starry Silences (CCC.89)

Comfortable, shared silences that speak louder than words ever could.

Exhibit E: Drawing the Shared Sky (CCC.03)

Sketches and plans of a future drawn with hope, love, and a willingness to embrace the unknown.

Assessment:

The subject demonstrates a healthy and heartfelt progression through the stages of becoming each other’s Counterpart-Compass. Intentional emotional choices and meaningful shared moments reveal a deepening connection, indicating a steady movement toward a lifelong commitment built on mutual understanding and care.

Differential Diagnosis:

None. This connection is definitive and unique to the subject and their soulmate.

Plan:

1. Launch Proposal Protocol: Drop the big question with equal parts confidence and charm. Bonus points for not crying or tripping over your words.

2. Start Honest Talks: Talk openly about dreams, fears, and what kind of takeout you'll order when life gets messy. No topic is off-limits, including who steals the blanket.

3. Create Daily Rituals: Build little habits that say, "I'm here" - including stealing fries, making coffee, or sharing ridiculous videos at 1 A.M.

4. Keep Emotional Check-ins: Make sure feelings don't turn into silent sulks. Communicate like adults (or at least like well-meaning toddlers).

5. Celebrate Wins: Whether it’s surviving a "blue" day or remembering an anniversary without a calendar alert, treat every milestone like it deserves confetti. And maybe cake. Or ice cream.

6. Trust the Compass: Maintain faith in internal guidance even when external factors cause uncertainty.

Prognosis:

Promising and full of potential, with the kind of unfolding that can't always be predicted but feels just right. Likely to bring moments of quiet joy, unexpected laughter, and a steady deepening of something truly meaningful. With care and curiosity, the path ahead looks beautifully open.

Formal Proposal:

Somewhere between every shared glance, every quiet laugh, and every small steady choice, I realized I wasn’t just falling for someone. I had found my counterpart.

You're the person who makes sense of things when life doesn’t. You bring clarity without needing to fix, comfort without needing to say a word, and joy without needing to try. You didn’t just arrive, you aligned. Like some unseen part of me always knew you were coming.

You’ve become my compass. Not because I was lost, but because everything started pointing to you. You ground me and inspire me, sometimes in the same breath. I never expected love to feel like direction. But with you, it’s less about where we’re going and more about who I get to walk beside.

And together, we’ve built something bigger than just us. Something real that’s hard to put into words. We're a scattered but perfect trail of shared moments that have become our story. Some bright, some quiet, some hilariously strange. This isn’t about one perfect moment when the stars lined up. It’s about choosing every day to keep finding that light together.

So here I am, with a heart full of certainty and a slightly sweaty hand, asking the only question that feels big enough for what you mean to me:

Will you marry me?

P.S. I solved it. 🧡 I'd say I read your mind, but that might ruin the mystery.

A	B	C	D	E	F	G	H	I	J	K	L	M	N	O	P	Q	R
0
1			M	Y
2				O
3		S	O	U	L			B			M					F
4			R			W	I	L	L		I		M	A	R	R	Y
5			A	N	D			U			R					A
6			N			M		E	V	E	R	Y	T	H	I	N	G
7			G	R	E	E	N	S			O					K
8	T	H	E								R
9	O		S
10

ClassyBougie

23:11

Yes.

And you asked first… but I was this close to asking anyway! Guess great minds really do think alike 🙂💫

Text with Creator's Style turned off ^{[ Click this if hover effect is disabled ]}

Notes:

no one tell ppp & sss, but this might be my fav child. ugh, favoritism. i think i just gave all my mel/franktussy here (i didn't use that right)
& mentioning kindred spirits while i've insisted all these past days, as i was writing this, that they’re each other’s counterparts (oh man, #semantics)
thought i’d go bald figuring things out, but thanks for the wishes - they really helped! call me anon, admin, whatever works. thanks <3

resources + code that i tweaked a lot (click to see!):

- phonescreen
- forum skin
- group chats/messages with imessage skin
- hover text
- quilt log, mood tracker, crossword puzzles using ms excel
- got other gifs from twt itself, but also from here
- edited ppts&quizzes on canva
- free to use images from unsplash
- clips from IG reels of the actors
- smiski photo from my irl bestie (her current obsession)

Series this work belongs to:

← Previous Work Part 3 of the triple-letter files Next Work →

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Comments

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starberrybear on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 07:21PM UTC

THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I WAS IJBOLING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT LIKE A MANIAC UR SO TALENTED!! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LIVE THIS SERIES THE WAY YOU WRITE THEM I LOVE UR KINGDON UR AMAZING I HOPE U KEEP DOING THESE AS LING AS YOU WANT TO BC I CAN GUARUNTEE THAT WE WE WILL ALWAYS ENJOY AND READ THEM

Last Edited Tue 27 May 2025 07:33PM UTC

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:51PM UTC
  
  "ijboling in the middle of the night like a maniac" none of these words are in the bible. ok maybe middle or night or maniac, ok maybe they ARE in the bible. never read it, cannot confirm. ily
  
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griffenly on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 07:27PM UTC

GOD this is so fucking funny never quit these

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:52PM UTC
  
  tysm i love ur works pls im genuinely in awe of you
  
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2. 1. griffenly on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:26PM UTC
    
    so kind !! your ability to write humor in such a creative form like this makes me awestruck !!
    
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northrndwnpr on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 07:29PM UTC

just laughed so loud someone came into my room to check i'm okay, robby saying IJBOL will get me every time without fail, and 'you once implied i was your best friend' jdbfljwekbfjlwehfb
(Dr. L situationship, Abbot best man btw)

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:53PM UTC
  
  omg rightttt the "you once implied i was your best friend" was the main reason i started the ppt. so this is awesome to me tyty
  
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thefiercestcalm on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 07:54PM UTC

This is the funniest shit I have ever read, amazing. Incredible, iconic. 😆

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:56PM UTC
  
  thank youuuuu <3
  
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dammitjoanne on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 07:56PM UTC

this one was really hard to not laugh out loud in the middle of the street cause ROBBY WALKING FRANK DOWN THE AISLE????? only missing an powerpoint slide of them walking down the isle on robby's presentation

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:55PM UTC
  
  reading it in the middle of the street?! hello THE CARS ao3 user dammitjoanne (my my ok u caught me, i added that aisle joke last minute grr i will be back with a vengeance) lol tysm!!
  
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elles on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:00PM UTC

GOD YOURE MY FAVORITE FUCKING PERSON EVER THE STEAMER THING KILLEF ME

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:59PM UTC
  
  me personally i'll choose robby as best man just for the steamer lmao tysm ily
  
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Mollywog on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:03PM UTC

CRYING

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1. Mollywog on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:04PM UTC
  
  And a part 2 too?!?
  
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2. 1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 09:59PM UTC
    
    indeed! part 2 soon!!! (pray 4 me as i drown in html)
    
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yoonpjm on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:19PM UTC

“i have known both love and loss” 💀💀💀

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:00PM UTC
  
  the voices inside my head debated so long if i can add that. i guess we know who won 😭
  
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bookinsomnia on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:19PM UTC

I’m dyyyinnng 😂😂😂😂 this is soooo funny, I nearly started crying when Princess’s ringing endorsement of Robby was just “he is one of the men.” Omg, the nurses in your story are the real MVPs, having to put up with all the maladjusted doctors, but doing it with humor and style. Can’t wait for part 2!!

Last Edited Tue 27 May 2025 08:29PM UTC

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:03PM UTC
  
  michael "robby" robinavitch, one of the men ever ❤️ heehee thank you so much again for reading !! always grateful
  
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antluhrs on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:20PM UTC

IJBOL
i took the quiz and did not get nearly enough of the same letter to have a situationship :( heartbroken

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:04PM UTC
  
  that means you deserve the label, ao3 user antluhrs. situationships fear you, chin up <3
  
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Ace-Achilles (AceAstro) on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:30PM UTC

Oh wow I’m about to cry laughing!!!!
‘Red bull in one hand, ego in the other’ I cannot believe how amazing this is?
Will take the quiz and report back but I hope it’s Samira I am in love with her <3

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:20PM UTC
  
  hello pls report back, it's been like... 3 working days!! (im kidding, no pressure) tyty
  
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Musing_and_Music on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 08:45PM UTC

Once again I admire your commitment to the bit!
CDDAEABBCC, I got Samira! But I've got Frank, Robby, and Collins just behind!
I love how some of the crew's answers are just so obvious! And Frank's that spell Dad several times 😂
The best man/witness convo is so good as well! I'd personally choose Jack 😊

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:21PM UTC
  
  thank you so much!!!! and yay someone noticed the ADADADA <3 (samira situationship... my dream)
  
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134340inthestars on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:02PM UTC

Was having a miserable day. Cackled into my pillow. Life is good again 🙏🏻

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sat 31 May 2025 10:23PM UTC
  
  very glad that i made u laugh :") hope ur days get better
  
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La_Cazadora on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:06PM UTC

❤️❤️❤️

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sun 01 Jun 2025 07:48PM UTC
  
  💕
  
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crazykittycat on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:10PM UTC

😂😂😂 this was hilarious hahahaha love this!

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sun 01 Jun 2025 07:49PM UTC
  
  thank u!!!! :)
  
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penguin_purple on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:11PM UTC

every time I think you can’t outdo yourself, you do. this was so fucking funny

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sun 01 Jun 2025 07:51PM UTC
  
  ahhh thank you, hope i live up to it until the end!!
  
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sawdustdiamonds on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:16PM UTC

IJBOL you are my favorite comedian!! thank you so much for this part 3 update

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Sun 01 Jun 2025 07:54PM UTC
  
  your catholic langdon is one of my favorites so this is high praise to me thank u so much
  
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naupaka on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:28PM UTC

I am absolutely perishing of laughter, and of course I got Langdon as my situationshop, tho Robby was a close second.
I never thought of PowerPoints like this in a fanfic but I am 1000% on board, thank you for broadening my horizons.

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Wed 04 Jun 2025 03:26PM UTC
  
  langdon and robby as situationships... i'm gonna save you. and yay!! thank you so much :)
  
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2. 1. naupaka on Chapter 1 Wed 04 Jun 2025 10:05PM UTC
    
    if there is one thing I need rescuing from it is DEFINITELY my taste in men. :'D
    
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melwrites (madandimpossible) on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:40PM UTC

i’m crying tbis is the funniest fhckjng thing i’ve ever read in my life. i thought the first in the series was great but this third one sent me INTO ORBIT
John as the diversity hire is SO FUNNY

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Wed 04 Jun 2025 03:27PM UTC
  
  into orbit? nooo i'm going to find a way to get u back here soon.. lol tyty!!
  
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MakingSweetLoveWith_aGhost on Chapter 1 Tue 27 May 2025 09:59PM UTC

Omg I can't BREATHE EEVEE THIS IS AMAZING!!!!
crackfics and textfics are literally my favorites and this one is so FUNNY
LET THE PITT CREW BE SILLYYYYYYY
♥️♥️♥️♥️

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1. Anonymous Creator on Chapter 1 Wed 04 Jun 2025 03:28PM UTC
  
  silly pitt crew!! ...and then we woke up? lmao thank u so much!
  
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