Chapter Text
Evan was very irritated. He had been patient with Barty clinging to him all day, even though he felt miserable because it wasn’t real. He had dealt with Sirius Black being an asshole. He had ignored Regulus’ comment of him being “so done”. And he had even endured weird looks in the halls.
But while he was strolling around with Barty for a second time after their nap to get him even more tired, he had found his sister. And his mood went downhill.
Don’t get him wrong, he loved Pandora, but she was way too honest sometimes, and she knew him too well. It was something he usually loved about her, though, not that day.
“Cas told me about this ” she said pointing at Barty “It’s cute”
“It’s a nightmare”
“Looks like your biggest dream. Though dreams get bittersweet when you realize you’re just dreaming, don’t they?” Of course she could see right through him.
“More bitter than sweet. Yes”
“Good thing about dreams, is that they can always inspire you to at least make some part come true”
Evan peeped at Barty who was beefing with a few fairies that were flying “too close” to Evan (according to Barty). He was too entertained to pay attention to his conversation with Pandora.
“Dora, we would never work out” he whispered “and you know why”
His sister smiled at him, it wasn’t quite a pity smile but it did seem a bit sad.
“Oh, Evy ” she said. Perhaps it had been that annoying nickname what started it all. Perhaps it had been the truth that followed “You can't know that for sure, and you will never know. Unless you overcome your fear”
After that, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. And oh how that annoyed him.
Besides, as if he hadn’t had enough, there was now a gryffindor in his dorm, because it turns out his best friend had kept his relationship a secret from everyone.
So, yes. He was very irritated.
But then, Barty handed him a page from his book where he had been drawing.
“I drew this for you” he said.
Evan took the drawing. Potter poorly stifled a laugh behind him. It was two stick boys holding hands, both of them had heart eyes, one had a B over his head and the other one an E, in between them was a plus symbol. Ah, and there was a big heart drawn around them. It was the ugliest drawing of a heart that Evan had ever seen, it was crooked and disproportionate. Maybe even a five-year-old could’ve done better.
Barty looked so proud though.
“Do you like it?”
Evan didn’t notice when he started smiling, but his lips were already curled upwards when he tried to.
“Yes, B” he replied “I love it”
After a while, Evan had managed to convince Barty to take a shower and get on his pyjamas. Barty always took long showers, so after quickly showering himself, Evan hoped to get some free time before Barty clinged to him again.
He flopped on Regulus’ bed where he and Potter were playing chess. Or more like Potter was playing with all his wits and Regulus was just gazing at him, moving pieces without actually paying attention to the game.
“Oi, drink, Reggie” Potter said to Regulus.
“Why are you making him drink so much water?” Evan asked “This is like his seventh glass since you got here”
“Remus came up with the theory that maybe if he drinks a lot of water, the potion will get out of his system sooner than expected. If it works he could be fine in the early morning”
“Why didn’t he come up with that theory when I went to ask?”
Potter shrugged.
“Sorry, mate” he looked over the board and his eyes lit up “Oh! Checkmate!”
Regulus clapped for him happily.
“Congrats, love!”
Potter smiled.
“Thank you, sweetheart. Rosier, are you witnessing this? It’s the first and probably the last time I win a match against Regulus”
“Can you even call that a match?”
“Shhh, it was a match” Potter said. Regulus even nodded. Who is so done now? Evan felt like asking “And I won! Rosier, write that down”
“Evan! Darling!” Barty called. When or why did he pick that pet name? “I missed you!”
Evan got up before Barty could throw himself over him. Instead the boy took his hand and he took the opportunity to lead the way.
“Let’s get you to bed, so you can go to sleep, okay?”
“But I’m not tired”
“Yes you are. Come on, you’re very tired” Evan said. Barty walked to his bed reluctantly.
“You should go to sleep as well, love” Potter said to Regulus.
“Will you stay with me?”
“No, he won’t” Evan said before Potter could answer.
“I’m sorry, Reggie, you heard him”
“I don’t care what Evan says” Regulus whispered, as if Evan couldn’t hear him clear as day “Stay with me”
“I can’t, love. I’ll stay here until you fall asleep”
“No!”
“Yes. I’ll see you in the morning, I promise”
“Jamieeee” Regulus cried.
“Let’s get you to sleep, love”
“And let’s get your voices down” Evan said, stuffing Barty under the covers. The faster he could get Barty to sleep, the better.
Before he could get away, Barty grabbed his hand, anchoring him.
“Don’t leave yet, darling” he asked.
“Barty–” he started protesting but Barty yanked his arm so he ended up almost sitting on the edge of the bed. Evan sighed, there was no escaping it so he settled in, sitting near the headboard with a grunt.
He was reminded that his hand was still Barty’s hostage when the latter slowly moved it towards his lips and kissed Evan’s knuckles. He looked down to find dark eyes looking up to him with so much adoration that made him want to throw up (in the best way possible).
“You’re so pretty” Barty said.
Evan felt a knot in his stomach. He gave him a soft smile before freeing his hand and running his fingers through Barty’s hair.
“It’s like you are a magical being or something, Ev. I could stare at you forever”
“You should stop talking, B”
“I just don’t get how you could be this beautiful” Barty sighed “You’re perfect”
Evan huffed.
“You know I’m not”
“You’re perfect for me ”
“Barty stop. You don’t mean it, and you’ll regret saying that in the morning”
“No. I’ve always found you beautiful”
Evan’s heart skipped a beat. He couldn’t take it anymore, he needed to get Barty asleep as soon as possible or he could actually have a stroke. He took a deep breath to ground himself. Everything coming from Barty’s mouth was rubbish, just the potion’s effects.
“Shhh. Sleep, would you?”
Without waiting for an answer, Evan ran his pinky from Barty’s temple to the tip of his nose, it was Pandora’s way of getting his little brother Felix to sleep. He repeated the motion multiple times, unsure if it would work with Barty, but after a few minutes his body started relaxing and his eyes closed. He soon fell asleep.
Evan waited a bit before getting up. He didn’t feel like sleeping yet, so he passed by Potter and Regulus who were cuddling, sharing whispers and he walked to the common room.
Since it was late, the common room was alone and in complete silence. He landed on a couch near the fireplace and closed his eyes. The overwhelming feeling of love rushed in, and so did the fear of rejection.
He breathed in and out, hearing the sounds of the Black Lake around him. He tried to focus on that instead of what Barty had said before.
I’ve always found you beautiful.
Even if it were true, Barty was, what many would describe, as a heartthrob. He probably found half the school beautiful, Evan wasn’t special.
He didn’t know how much time he had spent there, just breathing in and out until Potter stepped in startling him.
“Oh, didn’t mean to scare you”
“It’s fine” Evan said.
“Er… are you okay?”
“I’m fine”
Potter didn’t seem to believe him, but he shrugged.
“Okay, um, Regulus fell asleep, I don’t think he’ll wake up anytime soon but if he does, could you take care of him?”
Evan nodded.
“You’re a good boyfriend, huh…” he said “Didn’t see that coming”
Potter chuckled.
“Uh… thanks? I think”
Evan didn’t feel like being alone again yet, so he signaled for Potter to sit beside him.
“So… what are you two going to do now?”
Potter sat down.
“Well, it depends on Regulus, he’s the one with a complicated family. I trust my friends not to say anything, and I suppose we could trust you. Besides, I think only very few saw us”
Evan sighed.
“A few is enough for the Black household to know”
Potter shrugged.
“It’s not like he wants to stay there, anyway”
“And what are you going to do? Take him in?”
“Of course!”
Ah yes. Evan forgot he was talking to James Potter, of course he would take him in.
“Won’t your parents disagree?”
Potter shook his head.
“I’ve been telling them about Reg for a year, they’ll love to meet him. And we have plenty of room for him, if he wants to go home with me he will be welcomed”
Oh Regulus Black, that lucky prat. Evan smiled
“It’s good to know that. You two do make a good couple, I guess”
“Thanks, Rosier. If you allow me to say it without killing me…” he said “I think you and Crouch would also make a good couple”
Evan couldn’t help it, so he chuckled, which seemed to surprise Potter.
“We’re not like that, though”
“The potion never lies” Potter said.
“Didn’t you forget which potion you gave him”
“I’m not sure, but something tells me it was the pink one”
Evan sighed.
“So, from your outsider perspective, do you actually think Barty could be in love with me?”
“I do think so, but you’re not focusing on what is actually important” Potter said. Evan just stared at him until he talked again “It doesn’t matter if Barty’s in love with you”
“What? What do you even mean?”
Potter rolled his eyes as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Yeah, he definitely was under the Regulus Black influence.
“What matters is that you are in love with him. Or am I wrong?”
Evan stared at him, thinking how he could answer that question, denying it would be a waste of time, but he wasn’t willing to answer with the truth. At the end he settled for another question.
“Why would that matter?”
“You should tell him” Potter said, ignoring his question.
“What?!” Evan almost jumped from his seat “No! No, I won’t”
“There’s a fifty percent chance Crouch has a crush on you, according to the potions”
“And a fifty percent chance he doesn’t” Evan replied.
“So? Don’t you like gambling?”
“No!”
Potter sighed “Rosier…” he said, then shook his head, deciding they were now on a first name basis “Evan, I may not be the wisest person in Hogwarts, but I always say that if you want something to happen then you have to act”
Evan took a deep breath.
“You don’t get it. Even if it were mutual we would never work”
“You’d make a great couple”
“No, James. We wouldn't”
“Aren't you good friends?”
“Yes but–”
“Do you fight often?” James interrupted him.
“No, it’s–”
“Then, I don’t see the problem”
Evan scratched the back of his neck.
“Look its–” he stopped, then shrugged “I don’t know, mate it’s complicated”
“Love often is. It doesn’t mean you should just give up on loving” James said, because of course he would say something like that. It was the most impactful thing someone had ever told Evan. And it had been said by James Fucking Potter.
“Listen, It’s…” Evan sighed. What in Salazar’s name. Was he really about to confess all his secrets to James? Life could be so unexpected sometimes “You know how Barty has this, er… reputation ?”
James slowly nodded.
“Does it… bother you?”
Evan shook his head.
“And you know how there’s people who don’t really enjoy sex?”
“Ace people” James said.
“Yeah, well, someone who doesn’t really enjoy sex and someone who really enjoys it… together, as in, a relationship… it would be a disaster, wouldn’t it?”
James blinked. He seemed to be connecting the dots. Evan could see the moment it all clicked to him.
“You’re–”
Evan nodded.
“Oh” James said.
“See? We wouldn’t work”
James took a moment, he frowned and then he shook his head.
“Look, I am, in no way, Crouch’s friend. But, I think you are underestimating him. If he loves you, Evan, if he really does, he won’t care”
“What if he does care?”
“I don't think you will lose his friendship, even if it’s not mutual, even if you two give it a try and it doesn’t work out. You are mature enough to get past it”
Evan didn’t reply. His heart was beating faster than before. The feelings of hope and fear battling in his mind.
“You have nothing to lose” James said “and you will never know what could happen unless you act. Don't be afraid”
He sighed. Resting his head on the couch.
“I think you would get along with my sister Pandora very well”
James smiled at him and squeezed his arm before standing up.
“I’ll get going”
Evan stood up too.
“You know what? You can stay”
“What? Wait– really?”
Evan nodded and started walking to his dorm. James followed him in.
“Thanks, mate” he whispered before heading to Regulus’ bed.
Evan walked straight to his bed and tucked himself in. He had had a long day, so he just wanted to stop thinking and fall asleep. He yawned and changed his position to his side when he heard light footsteps.
Barty’s figure soon appeared in his eyesight and sneaked into his bed.
“I’m cold” he said, tangling his legs with Evan’s.
And, to be fair, it was a cold night, so instead of protesting he covered themselves and let Barty grab his hand.
“Goodnight” Evan whispered, before falling asleep.