How are my beautiful wives this fine morning?
Yosuuf the Beautiful
Do you mean Samantha and Egeria?
I mean all four of you. I’m lonely. Einar and I miss you. 🥺
Yosuuf the Beautiful
I just saw you ten minutes ago.
And you were delightful.
Einar, My Beloved Host
He means he enjoyed having sex with you.
Samantha the Lovely
Oh, we know what he meant. I wasn’t even there, and I know what he meant.
My dear Samantha, you were missing this morning.
Yosuuf the Beautiful
Yes. We woke up cold.
Samantha the Beautiful
And you had to warm up by having sex?
Of course.
Yosuuf the Lovely
Very cold. 😜
Sam the Lovely
Egeria and I wanted to see Thor’s speech.
Egeria the Gorgeous
Which you four should be watching as well.
😬
Garshaw the Ravishing
It was not my fault. My host needed sex.
Egeria the Gorgeous
No blaming Yosuuf. 🙂
Now come join us, and after the speech the six of us can have fun.
🥰
Garshaw
😍
Why was Thor offended by the mention of replicators? It was just a Star Trek joke.
Sam?
Where did you go?
Martouf (suggested name)
Hello, this is Martouf. Samantha is busy with her new mates right now. I’m sure that she will reply when she can.
What is so important that she can’t answer me?
And who are you?!
Martouf (suggested name)
As I told you, I am Martouf, and your sister is having sexual relations with her husbands and wives.
YOU DON’T TELL A GUY THAT HIS SISTER IS HAVING SEX!!!!
Martouf (suggested name)
I apologize for offending you.
Wait a minute.
Okay, I got your name in my contacts. Now…
What do you mean by husbands and wives. I thought she had one husband and one wife.
Martouf
It may be best if she explained herself.
No. I want to know now.
Martouf has left the conversation.
You can do that?! 😳
It seems I accidentally shared too much information with Samantha’s brother.
Malek 🌹
What did you do?
I shared that she had multiple husbands and wives.
Aldwin 🪷
😂 That’s one way to break the ice.
I have broken no ice, my dear husband.
Aldwin 🪷
It means you broke the news.
Malek 🌹
How does news break?
Gete 🌺
My dear symbiote means that now that Martouf has brought the issue up, Samantha will have to explain herself.
I did not know it was still a secret.
Gete 🌺
She will understand.
Mark
How many husbands and wives do you have?
Hello Mark. I saw the conversation.
Mark
Explain.
Do you remember Per’sus?
Mark
The husband of yours that eye-glowed in public, causing the public knowledge of aliens? Yes, I know of him.
However, I thought he was a human, not a creepy alien that looks human.
Mark
What is that?
That is the real Per’sus. He is serpentine, eight and a fourth inches long, and yes, those are fins.
Mark
But he looked human.
The human is named Einar. He is Per’sus’ host. They are like Trill from Star Trek. The difference is, they keep their individual minds.
Mark
So which one is in control?
They take turns, and my wives are the same way. Yosuuf is a host. I’ll tell you the name of the symbiote when we meet in person.
Mark
Maybe I don’t want to see my secret hiding sister.
My Symbiote
Hello Mister Mark Carter. How was your day? I, unfortunately, cannot share my name with you on this device. However, I look forward to meeting you.
Mark
What makes you think that we are going to meet?
My Symbiote
I live inside your sister’s head.
Mark
Of course, you do. 🙄
My Symbiote
Have you bought tickets to see Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith?
Mark
What?!?
Why do you ask?
My Symbiote
We are going to Earth to watch in a private theater. Since Samantha has told us that you enjoy the movies, I thought you and your family might want to join us.
Mark
Let me see if I understand this correctly.
ALIENS like Star Wars?!
My Symbiote
Yes.
Mark
I may have to reevaluate my opinion of you all.
Are we also going to watch with them, dear husbands?
Martouf, My Love
Samantha has invited us. It would be rude not to accept.
I’ll bring candy.
Malek, My Beloved
They will have candy at the theater.
Are you absolutely, positively sure with no doubt?
Malek, My Beloved
Maybe we should ask Jacob.
Jacob Carter has been invited.
Jacob Carter has joined the conversation.
The theater will have candy, correct? 🍭🍫🍬
Jacob Carter
Yes, and nachos and hot dogs and popcorn.
Lantash, My Love
I am more concerned about the possibility of being harassed for having husbands.
Malek, My Beloved
That is a possibility?
Jacob Carter
We’re aliens. You holding hands and sharing a few kisses will barely be noticed.
Malek, My Beloved
You are not an alien.
Jacob Carter
With Selmak in my head, I might as well be.
I have known people for decades who are suddenly asking if I was even born on Earth.
Malek, My Beloved
That is paranoia.
Jacob Carter
Unfortunately.
Sam
We are nearly at the front of the line. Any changes to the order?
We could always use more popcorn.
Teal’c
You do not need more popcorn.
Are you cutting off my popcorn?
Teal’c
Indeed.
Alright.
I don’t know who is going to take you to the next Jell-O wrestling event then.
Thor
I will take him.
Thor, you traitor!
Thor
☝️
😊
Sam
😄 Sir, I’ll get you popcorn.
Cool. Thanks. By the way, where did the three-man-three-snake marriage go?
Jacob
Aldwin said that he and Gete needed to burn calories.
Sam
That they do. Aldwin ordered nachos, popcorn, chocolate, sour belts, and ice cream.
Burning calories?
Daniel
Jack, really?
What?
Oh
Really, don’t they know better?
Lantash, Malek, Aldwin, get your snake butts back here. This is a public place.
Malek, Amb’s 🐍
Relax. We are finished.
It’s illegal.
Gete, Aldwin’s 🧑🏼
That is what made it fun.
Per’sus, talk sense to your people.
Gete, Aldwin’s 🧑🏼
That would make him a huge hypocrite. 🤣
Per’sus, Einar’s 🐍
I admit nothing.
Sam?!
Sam
You read his text. We admit nothing.
Alright.
That was fun.
So now that I’m on a more secure phone… If I understand right, Egeria is Selmak’s mother?
Dad
Yes, she is referred as her queen.
What’s the difference?
Dad
Queen’s fertilize their own eggs, so technically she is Selmak’s mother and father.
Also it’s a species thing.
And Per’sus was married to Egeria before?
Dad
For over nine hundred years.
Then is Sam even truly in the relationship, or did she blend into it?
Sam’s 🪱 Husband
That question is offensive. I have deeply loved every one of Egeria’s hosts.
Except the one who passed before I was born. I never had a chance to know her, but I truly respect and care for her as well.
Dad
Also they were dating – behind my back! – before we discovered that Egeria had survived.
Sam’s 🪱 Wife
😊
Dad
Oh, don’t you even start with me.
Cordesh
Garshaw, please, do not provoke him. We don’t need another council meeting to start with a twenty minute lecture from Jacob.
Dad
I’ll do it too. You know I will.
Never mind. My kids never had so much fun at the theater, but Dad, did you have to buy them that much candy and popcorn?
Dad
I only bought them two boxes of candy.
That’s not what I saw.
Thor
You are incorrect, Mark Carter. Selmak bought the rest.
Selmak
I wanted them to like me. 🥺
You are alien with glowing eyes and a reverberated voice. You are officially the cool grandma.
Selmak
🥹
My mother-in-law will not be pleased.
Thor
I enjoyed the vanilla root beer.
I thought you said the flavor didn’t align with your taste buds.
Thor
I enjoyed the bubbles.
Fair enough, but forget that. What did you all think about the movie?
Thor
It was an interesting examination into the human mind.
Sam’s 🪱 Husband
I didn’t like Order 66.
That was quite alarming, but they had to explain the disappearance of the Jedi.
Sam’s 👱🏻♂️ Husband
Such an attack brings up bad memories for them.
Oh.
Sam’s 🪱 Wife
Well, we do know that Palpatine was eventually defeated.
Sam’s 👩🏻 Wife
He was defeated. The Goa’uld will fall as well.
Sam’s 🪱 Husband
🥲
Teal’c
Indeed.
So are we good?
Mark
We will be.
That’s enough for now.
Mark
Do they treat you right? The husbands. The wives. The snake in your head.
Yeah. We are still figuring out the details, but remember Martouf? He’s helped me a lot in navigating a large polyamorous relationship.
Mark
So long as you are happy. 😃
Thank you.
Egeria
Oh, my dear mates. The pool is grown. The water is warm. It is time to make little ones.
Einar
This will be the most worthy reason that I have spilled seed.
Yosuuf
That is not particularly romantic, my lovely husband, but I understand your excitement. I would contribute if I could.
Per’sus
Our wonderful Egeria can use blood. It is how she extracted the code of life from my third host.
The pain is minimal – nonexistent if she uses her pheromones. Lydos found he didn’t like the pheromones, though other previous hosts did enjoy them. A small portion of the usual dose acts as a strong aphrodisiac.
Egeria
Oh, my sweet Lydos. He tried it once, but he immediately did not enjoy the feeling of being compromised. We cuddled that night instead.
Per’sus
He enjoyed the cuddles. 😃
Egeria
It is up to you. Samantha is curious. However, Yosuuf, I honestly don’t know how much they would affect you. Per’sus is much more susceptible to them than Garshaw. Because of that, I am always careful with the dosage.
Yosuuf
Garshaw and I both agree to the pheromones. She is particularly curious, and I would be honored if you used my code of life.
Einar
I also consent to the pheromones, and you know Per’sus agrees. Let us enjoy the night and make 🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱🪱.
😂❤️💕😘
How many new grandchildren do I have?
Sammy
Dad, it doesn’t work like that.
You will not deny me my grandchildren!
Egeria, Selmak’s Queen
Twenty
Sam
Dad?
Martouf
Your father has become still, and he is simply standing there with what is quite the happiest expression that I have ever seen.
I have more grandchildren!
Thor
Congratulations. 👽
Malek
I’m not the youngest Tok’ra anymore!
Jack
Malek, are you yelling?
Sam
You should see him in person. I’ve never seen him so happy. He’s bouncing on his feet.
Jack
Malek?!
Mark
What? How am I suddenly an uncle? Why didn’t anyone say anything when I saw you all.
They were conceived and born today. You are a new uncle to twenty children.
Mark
😳
Sam, are you okay?!
Sam
I am fine, Mark. Just tired.
Mark
Your mates are helping? I’ll yell at them if they aren’t. I don’t care if they are aliens.
Garshaw and Yosuuf are being very helpful.
Sam
Yosuuf made me an iron-rich protein drink that tastes like vanilla ice cream.
Yosuuf
Martouf helped.
Mark
What about your husbands? 😠
Sam
Well, Per’sus won’t let me take two steps without trying to help me walk, and I have learned that Einar fears childbirth.
Per’sus
His mother died giving birth to him.
Sam
So they are being too helpful.
Per’sus
We are not.
Sam
Let me walk across the room then.
Per’sus
You nearly tripped when I let go of you.
Egeria, Selmak’s Queen
Don’t worry, Mark. He is always like this the first time a new wife gives birth.
Also, he’s a little high on my pheromones right now. That always makes him extra protective.
Garshaw
He’s not the only one. However, I can fight it. I have to let them affect us. Yosuuf is quite enjoying the feeling though. 😄
After Yosuuf finally got Per’sus to stop fussing over their now sleeping wives, he laid down next to Sam.
Yosuuf laid down on the other side, propping herself up on her elbow to see Per’sus. She smiled as she watched him hold Sam’s hand, staring at her face with love and worry.
He noticed her watching, then reached for Yosuuf.
She laughed, keeping it soft so not to wake Sam or Egeria. She took his hand. “I’m not jealous, love. I was just admiring your smile.”
“My smile.”
“For over a hundred years, we have known each other, but it wasn’t until recently that I saw you truly smile.”
He smiled.
“That’s the one.” She relaxed, still holding his hand as she enjoyed Sam’s warmth.
~+~+~.
Per’sus later rushed to Sam in a panic. “What are you doing?!”
Sam laughed. “Relax. They’re just going to watch the waves.”
“But sea water hurts us.”
“And they’re safe in their tank. You Tok’ra have an irrational fear of the ocean. Yes, it’s dangerous to you as a symbiote, but not in your host. When was the last time you touched sea water with your host?”
“We never have,” Garshaw admitted as Per’sus frowned.
“Precisely. It wouldn’t hurt you, but you deny your hosts.”
“I would never deny my hosts anything,” Per’sus argued.
Sam kissed him. “Because they love you, they would never ask for what you fear.”
He frowned.
“I’m giving my children a chance to see the ocean’s beauty. I don’t want them to fear it.” She retreated.
“I think she is right,” Egeria said.
Per’sus’ frown finally relaxed.
Garshaw laughed and brought the tank closer to the water. The larvae were safe within. Then she took Per’sus’ hand while Sam leaned against him.
“They are safe.” Per’sus reassured himself.
“Yeah.” Sam smiled.
“I admit, I fear it as well,” Garshaw said, “but there is no need for it, not to the degree that we hold. My dear, Per’sus, it is truly best if our fears are not passed down. The larvae are safe, and look, they are happy.”
Per’sus smiled.
