Work Text:
--
It started as every important event in my life seems to. With fists and a trip to a medic. Which... really should be a testament to how fucked my life is, now that I think about it. But... well.... that's really better for a conversation with my therapist. When someone's being paid to listen, not when I'm sitting backstage at a concert I paid to attend. We do therapy thoughts when the money is being paid for that, not during fun money time.
Sighing I try to squint at my surroundings, everything's just a blurry image, but the paramedic was quite clear that I was not to put my glasses on until he was finished disinfecting and wrapping the cut on my forehead. "Hey! Are you okay?" I hear called off from someone to my left, my head turning slightly further to try to locate at least the silhouette of the person talking. There's a sucked in breath and a muttered, "Shit." as a few people step closer.
"That bad, huh?" I ask, annoyed at myself for sounding annoyed.
"No. No No." Someone quickly says, and there's some waved hands.
"I mean... kinda." Another says.
"Did that happen here?" Another asks.
I shake my head, hissing a little, "No. On the way here. A guy thought a skirt was an open fucking invitation. I educated him otherwise."
"You're not wearing a skirt..." The first man offers.
I snort, "Thank you for letting me know." I roll my eyes, "I wasn't, but another woman was. I wasn't gonna just let him bully her. She was barely 5' 2". He was easily my height. Told him that if he wanted to be a creep he could learn how to deal with someone his own size."
"Where is he?" The man asks, voice dropping a bit. I'm able to tell that he's looking around at least a little from here.
"Oh, he was in much worse shape than me. If I pick a fight, they aren't getting back up. I think the cops have him, though." I shrug, "I asked the paramedic on site to take me here instead. I wasn't missing this concert. Drove 3 hours to get here. No way in hell I'm letting a messed up face stop me from enjoying tonight." The first man chuckles a little, and my eyes are on him in a minute. A glare on my face even if I can't see him, "Something funny?"
He lifts his hands, "Nope. Just impressed by the dedication."
"Of course I'm dedicated. I keep missing the fucking tour dates. Took 3 fucking tours for me to actually check early enough for dates to get tickets. I'm not missing this. I'm just hoping they're able to get me out there in time. I know I'll probably miss the opener, but as long as I don't miss One Ok Rock's songs I'll still be happy." I stare at him, watching as the other 3 person shapes back up a little, "What about you? Aren't you excited for the concert?"
He chuckles again at me, "Something like that." He steps closer and I'm able to start making out a bit of his face.
"Oh..." I say, the breath knocked out of me.
"Oh?" He asks, seeming to be expecting something from me.
"You're pretty handsome. That's all." I say and he laughs a little louder, and I'm pretty sure he's smiling. At least I think he is, if I squint at least, "Sorry." I offer. "I'm supposed to be saying things out loud according to my therapist. Embracing the boldness and adventure of life." I make sure to put air quotes around the ending.
"I don't mind. Just wasn't expecting that to be what you'd say." He says, arms crossing.
"What were you expecting?" I ask, my head tilting.
I'm sure he was about to answer, but my head is quickly grabbed, "I told you not move." The paramedic is back again.
I huff, "I didn't. I'm sitting right were you put me."
"You literally just moved your head." He argues.
"You never told me I couldn't. You said don't move. You didn't say my head." I push back.
"You had you face shoved into a brick wall and your forehead gashed open by a window sill." He says, and I'm sure he's got that awful raised brow thing going on. He reexamines my face, "This is going to need stitches. We really should be at the hospital."
"Can't you just do it? I don't have time for the hospital." I argue.
The paramedic sighs, though it also sounds like a groan, "I can, but I'm not going to be able to numb this. You're gonna have to sit there and try not to flinch as we stitch this back up."
I huff turning to look at the guy next to me. I reach out a hand towards him, "You mind holding my hand during this. Pretty sure it's gonna hurt like a bitch." The guy jolts back a bit, and I pull my hand back towards my chest just a little, "You don't have to." I mutter.
My hand is grabbed, and I turn to look towards him as he sits next to me. "Stay like that. This is a better angle." The paramedic says, before turning to the guy. There's a pause, and I almost turn to look at him, "Just keep her busy if you're willing."
The man turns to stare at me, offering a smile and a squeeze to my hand. I give him an answering smile and squeeze, his face coming into a little more clarity, "Oh..." I whisper again, "Not just handsome. You're gorgeous." I laugh to myself at his surprised face, "Honestly it's so not fair. All the hot guys seem to be at this concert, but they've all got equally stunning partners standing right next to them." I stare him down, noticing his shocked expression, "You don't have a partner, do you?" I ask, hissing as the needle pierces my skin. I grip the hand in front of me tighter.
My other hand is also grabbed, and I give him a tight smile, "No I don't." He offers, with no further explanation.
"Fuck. That hurts." I say, fighting the wince. "And that's surprising. I'd think women would be throwing themselves at you. Probably some men too."
He laughs, though it sounds a little flat, "They do. But I want a genuine connection. Not just someone after me for..." He trails off.
"Your looks?" I offer and he only nods, "I can understand that. Genuine's hard to find these days." Another needle poke has me grip his hands tighter, noticing how he winces, "Sorry..." I mutter.
He shrugs, "Not like I really need my hands tonight anyways." he gives me a big smile.
I laugh, "Well that's one way to look at a concert. What's you favorite song of theirs?"
He seems to stiffen, "Uh... there's too many to choose from. What about you?"
I huff, "A none answer then. Are you even really a fan? You just want to steal my answers to impress me, is that it? Cause you'll have to try harder than that." I tease him, feeling the need to be just a little flirty.
He laughs again, "Caught me."
I laugh with him, "Knew it. But to actually answer you question. It's hard to choose. And it kinda really depends on my mood. Because there's different songs for different times of my life, you know?"
He nods, eyes a little wide, "Yeah I can get that." I squeeze his hands harder through another wince. "Why don't you tell me some of your favorites then? Keep your mind off things."
"Well... I love the classics, obviously. Stand Out Fit In got me through high school and the awkward years of just not feeling right in my own body. Renegades got me through all the times I was talked down to in my life. The number of people that treated me like I'm lesser just because of my age. It really is a rebellion anthem, and I'd listen to it a lot during college when I'd question why I was forcing my way through a major full of people that hated me taking up the space. Same with We Are. Especially during the times that my brain and parents just got way to fucking loud." I pause, feeling a little self-conscious trauma dumping to a stranger, but in for a penny in for a pound I guess, "I really resonated with the current album, though. Dystopia was amazing. Same with Delusional. Those two are probably the only reason I'm still sane after this election cycle. Tropical therapy is just... I can't even really describe it. It's like a calming sensation for all my anxiety. Uh... Tiny Pieces and The Pilot are the two I listen to when I need to bawl my eyes out. More Pilot now. They're just... the two ends of a healing journey. And they helped a lot with moving on from the abusive ex I had in high school. It's... it's a reminder that I'm okay as me, and that even the broken and scratched pieces of myself, are still... me." I whisper as I feel tears at the corner of my eyes, both from the pain of the stitches and the reminder of the weeks of listening to those songs on repeat, "And now Pilot is the song I play for myself when I need to remember to forgive my younger self. You just... get so angry with yourself for getting taken advantage of by something so obvious, but I know my anger is misplaced and I wouldn't be me without her, you know? So like... I'm just working on being the kind of person I think could have saved her."
I look at him, seeing his eyes widen, "Wow..."
I laugh it off, my own chuckling a little wet, "Yeah...it's a lot. Sorry."
"No no... don't be sorry." He says back. "That's what music is supposed to do."
"Yeah... They do a great job of it." I offer, "Though right now my absolute favorite song of theirs's has to be +Matter. Like I think I played it easily 20 times on the way here."
He laughs, "Really? Twenty times? Isn't that bit excessive?"
"Absolutely not." I growl at him, "It's like that got sunshine to condense into a song. I literally could chase away depression with that song. It's... ugh. I can't even describe it because I know I wouldn't do it justice. You don't even understand how I absolutely LOST it at work when the set list for this tour dropped and that was the encore. Like. It's just..." I groan again.
There's a laugh, and he opens his mouth to speak again, but the paramedic cuts him off, he's apparently really good at that. "And you're done. Bandaged and everything. Feel free to put the glasses back on."
"Thanks." I offer, trying to squint around to see where my frames got placed.
One of the hands lets go of mine, coming back with a set of familiar lenses, "Here."
I smile at him, grabbing the glasses and looking down to help my single free hand shove them on my face, "Thanks. Didn't you or your friends need to be seen too?" I ask, squeezing the hand still in mine as I look up at him. I can feel my jaw drop as I finally catch a look at who's been sitting next to me.
Taka gives me a smile, head tilting as he laughs, "Nope, we just live backstage until it's our turn out there." He continues to laugh at my shocked expression, "I was wondering at your boldness, but I guess the lack of sight explains it now."
"Oh my god... I've been rambling at you about your own songs." I mutter, just a little horrified.
"It was kinda cute though." He offers.
"Oh my god... I said you weren't a TRUE fan..." I panic, staring at him.
"Which was honestly really funny. I don't think anyone's ever accused me of that before." He's still smiling at me, and I can feel my face flush.
"Oh my god... "I whisper scream to myself. Ready to melt into the ground.
"I still don't get how you didn't put two and two together from the beginning."
"Well excuse me for not wanting to assume that four Asian men with long hair were the band I was coming to see." I snark at him, before remembering where I am and smacking a hand against my own chest. Though it doesn't help that it's the same hand that's still holding his. "I'm so sorry..." I start.
He cuts me off with a loud laugh, "So you're first instinct really is to fight." He looks down, seeming to realize where his hand now is and stares for a bit.
"Hey." I huff, pulling his gaze back to my face, "Eyes up here buddy. You might be an international rockstar, but that won't stop me from dropping you to the ground."
He laughs again, "Well good to know that you're an equal opportunity fighter."
I flush, before cracking my normal joke, "These hands are rated E, for everyone."
He smirks, eyes darkening just a little, "And what about the rest of you?"
I squeak at the question, face bright red now. "I uh..."
"Cat got your tongue? Where'd all the fight go?" He pushes eyes on my face as he smiles.
I shake my head, "You can't just say things like that. Especially when you don't actually mean it."
The hand on my chest shifts, and I'm ready to argue with him, but stop as it moves my chin up, "One. I can say whatever I want. It's my concert. Two. I don't say things I don't mean. So I'll ask again, what about the rest of you?" He raises a brow at me as he leans in a little more.
"I..." I start, pausing to try to figure out what I'm even trying to say. Part of me wants to give right in to whatever this man is suggesting. But another part pushes forward, "I don't just give parts of myself away to anyone anymore. I'm an all or nothing kinda person. Fall hard, fall fast. So yes, the rest of me is available, and very much interested. But only if you want everything not a piece of me. I just... I don't do hook ups. Not even for you."
He stares at me, eyes searching just a little. He nods, leaning back, and I feel ready to kick myself for passing up and opportunity anyone else would have sold a left kidney to be given. "I can respect that." Taka mutters as he glances down. He looks back up at me, "Would you let me have time to explore if I want it all?"
My head tilts of it's volition, "Why?" I ask, not being able to stop the question from flowing out of my mouth.
"Because I've liked the preview so far and I think I could really like the rest of the book too. Maybe even enough to become a main character." He says with a smile, like it's not the most earth shattering thing I've heard.
--
Getting brought back stage after a concert was a new experience. Especially as I try to get my legs to not give out under the adrenaline crash. The staff member keeps giving me side glances, but I try to ignore it, knowing I must be sight with the bandaged face. I'm directed into a dressing room, spotting the four men who'd just walked off the stage. They all turn to look at me as the door closes, and my brain just short circuits. Suddenly I'm bowing to them, and as I stand up Taka gives me a raised brow while he tries to hide his laugh. My eyes zero in on it, "What?!" I huff at him, standing up and crossing my arms, "I panicked, okay? And my brain just went on autopilot."
Taka moves closer to me with a snort, "And autopilot was a... bow? That's not really an American thing."
I huff again at him, "I have a lot of Korean friends, okay? Bowing's a big thing for them." He laughs again and I reach out and smack his shoulder, not even thinking about it, "I told you. I panicked." I look towards him, a small smile on my face, that drops when I see him stare at his shoulder, "Oh my god. I'm so sorry. I didn't even think." I start to panic again.
There’re snorts from around the room, and I turn to see Tomoya trying to hide a laugh. Ryota is shaking his head, and Toru is smirking at us, "I see it now." Toru mutters at us, turning to look at Ryota.
The bassist nods his head, "Yep. Taka's type all the way."
"I mean... I knew that from before the show. With how they were interacting in medical. Just wasn't expecting him to actually bring her back." Tomoya adds with another laugh.
I can feel my face flush and am ready to turn away, still wanting to apologize to Taka. Instead, when I look at the singer, he's glaring down the rest of his members, "Cut it out." He growls at them, his hand reaching out to grab onto my wrist. "You're gonna scare her away." I'd swear he's even pouting right now as I let him drag me a little closer.
I smile at Taka, "I don't scare that easily." I mutter as I give his hand a pat where it's wrapped around my upper arm.
At the same time a voice calls across the room. "I thought we had agreed no hook ups in the back stage area?" Ryota asks, staring down Taka who flushes a little.
I turn towards him ready to bite back, but Taka beats me to it, "Not a hook up." He glances at me in his peripheral and I can't help but smile softly at him. As I look back towards the other side of the room, though, I can't help but feel a little self conscious at the way the others are staring at us with expressions of barely contained disbelief. I can feel myself shuffle just a little, more unwilling to face this than the original biting and sarcastic remarks. Taka pulls me towards one of the corners of the room, sitting us down into one of the chairs so that I'm faced away from the other three. He gives me a warm smile, leaning forward in the chair and bracing his hands against his knees, "So what were your plans for the rest of the night?" I stare at him, not stopping myself from taking in the tattooed arms, now that he'd swapped into a tank top.
I manage to pull my eyes away to look back up at him, eyes wide as he gives me a smug smile, that also has a teasing edge as he raises a single brow my way. I shake my head a little, trying to get myself to focus again, "I didn't really have anything major planned. It's 3 hours home. I've got work in...." I glance down at my watch, "Uh... 6 hours. Ish. So it was a late night car ride with the windows down and screaming along to lyrics as I try to avoid the cops." I again find myself absolutely lost on why these words are just falling out of my mouth. Like oversharing just became my new favorite hobby.
Taka laughs, leaning back, "And we're on that playlist?"
I huff, leaning back and crossing my arms, watching as his eyes trace my own sleeve of tattoos, "Obviously. I was probably gonna be playing the entire set list at least another two times. Best way to keep the energy flowing. Especially since I'm not likely to sleep tonight."
Here his eyes widen a bit, "Not sleep?"
"No use. Your mind gets way to excited. Way to energized. Trying to sleep is just going to make work even worse tomorrow. So, it was a 3 monster energies and anime kinda night until I could reasonably log on to get work done. Then leaving early to pass out." I overshare.... again.
"That doesn't seem the healthiest..." He offers, head tilting as he stares at me, expression unreadable for me.
I shrug, "College instincts still left over mixed with ADHD. Covid really did a number on my ability to regulate... well.... anything. So I just kinda go with it."
He stares me down now, brows a little furrowed, "You keep mentioning college. How old are you actually?"
"28." His eyes widen a little, "I know. not really college aged anymore. But Covid hit right as I was supposed to be graduating. No graduation really makes it hard for my brain to understand that we've moved past that chapter in my life." He still looks concerned, "What?"
"Do you know how old I am?" He asks.
I wave it off, "Older than me, obviously. You said it was a 20-year anniversary of the band this year. So you've gotten be some amount older."
"I'm 37." Taka responds, still staring at me. I just shrug again, " That's a 9-year age gap. Doesn't that bother you?"
"If I was younger, maybe, but we're in more comparable chapters in our lives. It's also not like you knew me when I was a kid. Besides, I tend to prefer older men, so not really an issue on my end." There's a snort somewhere behind me, and I have to fight myself from turning around to glare, though Taka seems to have no problem shooting a glare over my shoulder, "Does it bother you? I mean, I'd get it if it does, but I also think you could probably really lean into the Sugar Daddy rumors that would happen." There's more laughter behind me as Taka stares back at me wide eyed. "What?" I ask with a little laugh, "You can't tell me that's instantly where they'd go if anything happened between us. It's either that or I'm a gold-digging whore. Which like... could be funny to deal with. It's been a while since someone had the nerve to call me a whore to my face." I stare off a little thoughtful.
"You... that..." He starts, but doesn't actual finish a sentence.
I flush a bit, my words catching up to me again after the fact, "Sorry. Sorry. I should really think before I just say anything. And I didn't mean to push anything. Or imply..."
He cuts me off, leaning forward again as a hand grips mine, a smile back on his face as he takes in my flushed expression. There's some words spoken behind us, but I'm fairly certain they're speaking in Japanese now. Taka glares over my shoulder again, snapping back with something also in Japanese. He looks back to me, "Any way I can convince you to stay here for the night? Maybe have some more private conversations." He stresses the word private as he glances over my shoulder again.
I tilt my head, "I didn't bring a computer, so I wouldn't be able to get to work on time if I stayed. I'm also not too keen on trying to make that drive when tired in the morning. Cause I'd have to leave at like, 3 or 4 am."
"What about calling out?" Taka offers.
I shake my head, "Nope. This was a really last minute decision for me. I wouldn't get approved for PTO, and I can't leave my interns alone. It's only their 3rd week."
Taka huffs, my hand staying in his, "Where do you live from here? Is it on the way to our next tour stop?"
"Um... what's you're next tour stop?" He pulls out his phone, pulling up a map and showing where they're traveling next. I then point to where I'm located on the map.
He stares at it, "Hmm... that's not terrible."
I shake my head, "I wouldn't be able to take you to Canada. I can't risk crossing back over the border right now."
He looks at me, "I wasn't going to suggest that you take me there. I was just wondering if we'd be in the path the van would be taking anyways. And you're not too far away from it." He gives my hand a squeeze before letting go and standing up.
"Where are you going?" I ask, moving to stand up with him.
He places a hand on my shoulder, pushing me to stay, "To go try to convince our manger that I've not lost my mind."
--
I'm not sure how we got to here. Taka sitting in the front seat of my car wrapped in my black windbreaker. He's loosened up the hood just a little, and smiles over the mask at me. I just shake my head, "You're gonna give your poor manager a heart attack."
Taka just shrugs, "He's used to it. We're a rock band." He looks down at himself, "Good call on the mask and jacket though."
I just shake my head, plugging in my phone and putting in my address. I pull up spotify, adding a bunch of songs to my queue before turning to him, "You can be in charge of the music after those all play. And no, you don't get to judge me for playing your own songs in my car."
He laughs, "No intention of judging."
"Oh." I mutter, before holding up the phone. I lock it and then show him my passcode, "So you can get in to mess around with the music."
Taka stares, and I try my best not to flush, "You're giving me your phone passcode. Just like that?"
I shrug, starting to pull the car out of the parking garage, "Why not? It's not like I have anything to hide. Besides, trust and honesty are really important to me. I know it can be hard for people, so I always try to offer reciprocal trust when it's given."
"But you don't really know me."
"You don't really know me either." I quip back, glancing at him before looking back at the road, "Yet you still got in a car with me. So consider this my own offer."
He opens and closes his mouth a couple times before looking back at the phone. We get to the on ramp to the highway and I give him a little smirk, "Did I ever mention that I was on a racing team in college?" His eyes widen as I laugh. The windows go down, the music goes up, and we're speeding down the highway.
--
I groan, feeling the hand around my waist tighten as we're lead through some of the back hallways of the stadium, "I can't believe you're doing this. I told you it was fine. You're supposed to be preparing for the international portion of your tour."
Taka smirks at me, "As if I was going to miss out on this. You already made me miss the last concert you attended."
I huff at him, giving a little shove to his shoulder, "We'd only been talking for two weeks. You were finishing up the North America part of your tour. I didn't think you'd make a big deal about it. Besides, I thought you hated Kpop."
He frowns at me, "I wasn't going to make a big deal about it until I saw the outfit photo. And I don't hate Kpop, I just don't like when our band gets looped into the same category."
I shrug my shoulders, "I can get that." Then my eyes narrow as I stare him down, "What's wrong with my outfits?"
We're directed into a room and we both give the staff member a slight bow of our heads. Taka wraps both arms around my waist, holding me out in front of him, "Absolutely nothing's wrong with your outfits. They're gorgeous. I just prefer when they're for me."
I laugh at his pout, pulling him towards the couch in the room. We sit next to each other, and I make sure to throw my legs over his lap. I pull one of his hands to rest on my bare thigh before leaning in until our foreheads are barely touching, "These outfits are for me, Taka. Not anyone else, but I'm glad you enjoy them."
He grumbles, hand clenching slightly on my thigh, "Well you're wearing them to another group's concert? How am I not supposed to get a little possessive?"
I laugh, leaning back over and pressing a kiss to his cheek, "By all means. Be possessive. You won't see me complaining." He wraps his arms around my waist and I sigh, "But was this really all necessary? I didn't need any of this. I was perfectly happy with my seats up in the nose bleeds."
He turns my head, pressing a kiss to my lips, "Of course it was necessary. You may not have needed it, but I could get it for you. I'm intent on spoiling you, love." He says, though his eyes widen at the term of endearment that falls out.
As he flushes and starts to sputter, I lean forward to press my own kiss to his lips, "Love you too." I whisper, knowing how important it is to validate each other's feelings. Especially with this still being less than 3 months old.
"I..." He whispers, staring at me, "You... you do?" His eyes unsure.
I nod, "Of course I do. Apparently I need to do a better job of showing it if you're so unsure."
I open my mouth to continue, but am cut off when the door opens and shuts. Taka and I push back from each other a little, turning to stare at the door wide eyed at being caught in our own little world. I'm at least a little relieved to see that the eight men across from us look equally as flustered. Quite a few of them shuffling around where they stand. I watch as Hongjoong calls them all to attention, doing a traditional Ateez greeting. I can't help but smile at seeing it, feeling the adrenaline start to course through my system. I stand ready to say high, but my smile falls a little as they still seem a little nervous. I glance back towards Taka, only to see him manspreading across the couch as he glares at the group across from us. I give him a little shove, redirecting his gaze to me as he gives me a single raised brown. I cross my arms, answering with my own raised brows, "Cut it out."
He huffs, standing up next to me and wrapping an arm tight around my waist again. I roll my eyes, leaning down a little to press a kiss to his cheek. We turn back towards the eight men, "It's... it's nice to meet you. Some of us are big fans of yours." Hongjoong says.
The others nod, "I thought our manager was playing a joke when he said you were here to see us." Mingi offers up, though he looks a little unsteady.
I turn to look at Taka, who gives them another raised brow. I give him a nudge with my elbow, "You promised to play nice." I whine towards him.
He sniffs, "I promised no such thing." I glare at him and he huffs, "But fine. It's nice to meet to all too."
We move back towards one of the couches. The eight of them sit across from us, and Yunho asks when the silence extends for a bit, "So um... what made you come to one of our shows?" They all keep their eyes on Taka, though I can see the glances in my direction.
Taka pulls my legs back up over his lap. One arm moving around my back. His other hand hooks a thumb towards me, "Her." is the only thing he offers before spreading his hand over my bare thigh.
I can see all the eyes turn towards me and I flush, "Um... big fan. Thank you for meeting with us."
I watch as they exchange a couple glances, some of them eyeing me up a bit more. Taka's hand tightens a bit more on my thigh, "You're her favorite Kpop group. When she said she was coming to this concert, I thought I'd tag along."
"So you haven't listened to us?" Wooyoung asks, looking a little lost.
Taka turns to look at me, brows a little furrowed, "You have." I offer to him, "The song you liked in the hotel."
"Oh?" He says, "That was really good. Didn't even realize it was a kpop group."
I turn the look at the rest of the group, "Guerilla. That's what I was playing for him."
They all nod, though there's still some confusion. I try to move my legs off Taka's lap, feeling a little uncomfortable with the weird vibes happening. His hand holds firm though, and his gaze moves from staring them down to looking at me. He pulls me closer, leaning our heads together to press a kiss to my lips. He pulls back, smirking at my flushed face as his gaze darts back to the other side of the room. I glance over and spot a few knowing looks, even a few raised hands.
"Oh." I mutter, as my mind finally connects the dots. I look back at Taka, giving him a light smack to the chest, "I can't believe you. Is that why you did this? Wanting to lay a claim in front of them?" I laugh incredulously at the absolute absurdity.
He just raises a brow at me, "It worked."
I laugh again, "Taka, love, they didn't even know who I was." I stress. "They were excited to meet you." I shake my head.
He pulls me closer, "Doesn't matter if they knew who you were or not. Just needed to make sure they knew you were mine."
I laugh again, "I'm sure they don't even care, Taka."
"Actually." San speaks up, "She's an Atiny. We're pretty possessive of our fans."
Taka growls at him, and I'm stuck turning to look at them with my mouth slightly open. There's nods amongst the members, "Hongjoong Hyung even told Atinys not to go looking at other idols." Wooyoung adds in, though I notice the faint lift at the corner of his mouth.
I just shake my head, now I'm glad my legs are keeping Taka on the couch with me. I place a hand to his chest, "First off. Taka is not an idol, he is a rockstar. Don't make that mistake again. Second, Hongjoong's exact wording was for Atiny not to go looking at other oppas. Every single one of you is younger than me, completely negating that point. Third, if you think I'm going to let a man tell me what to do, you can ask Taka here exactly how we met each other. Maybe it'll save you a trip to the hospital." I sniff, turning back to Taka and placing hands on either side of his face, "And I've only got eyes for you. I'm choosing you Taka. To fight for, to love until you no longer want me, and probably long after then too. I'm yours, love. No matter who's concerts I go to or what music I listen to."
His eyes are wide, before his face shifts into something absolutely lovesick. "Love you.", he whispers as he presses a kiss to my lips again.
We turn back to the others in the room, and I roll my eyes at the smirks, "Oh har har. Really funny."
"So what's this about a hospital?" Wooyoung asks.
I give him a hard stare, "Oh bite me." I yelp as I feel a set of teeth on my arm. I turn to stare at Taka who pulls back and gives me a smug smile, "You asshole! Did you just bite me?"
He sticks his tongue out at me, "The only one biting you is me."
I just stare at him, ignoring the laughs around us, "I can't believe you just bit me." I glare at him, "Especially after you already turned me down earlier." I ignore the chokes next to us as I stare him down.
He tilts his head, "I'm seeing the advantage of it now."
"No you're feeling possessive, now." He opens his mouth and I shake my head, "And no, I'm not letting you mark me up now. That was a one time offer. Maybe next time you'll take it seriously." I huff, crossing my arms and pouting at him as he laughs.
--
The video call connects and my screen fills with Taka's face. He gives me a wide smile, "Hello Love." There’re some calls of hello behind him, and I couple people calling out my name. I watch as he rolls his eyes, standing up and walking across the room.
A door shuts and I can feel my face flushing, "I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were with others. I can let you go."
He shakes his head, "Nothing to worry about. How was your day?"
"It was good." I say, hesitant to start talking too much, "I'm serious, Taka. I don't want to pull you away from something important. I can talk with you later. It's no big deal."
He frowns at me, "Love. It is a big deal. You're the important thing. I left the room because I wanted to make sure I could give you all the attention you deserve."
My flush deepens, mind trying to come to terms with someone actually putting me first, "I mean... I was just going to talk about my day. Pretty boring stuff."
Taka's frown turns into a sad smile, "Absolutely nothing boring about that." I watch as he settles down into a chair, making a whole show out of it. I realize once he's staring at me again, he's trying to drive home that he has no plan of leaving. "Why don't you tell me about your day? You mentioned the other day that work was sending you to a... jail? For an inspection? Did that go well?"
I can feel the tears itch at the back of my eyes as I start to go into details about my day. Feeling seen for the first time as someone actually listens to me. I can feel myself stiffen multiple times as someone comes in to try to grab him. But it's an instant relief when he simply waves them back off, actively ignoring them. His eyes completely focused on me and smile encouraging me to keep going.
--
"Thank you Boston!" Toru yells, and I smile from the wings. One of the stage crew having insisted that I move up here during the encore. I'm happy they did, the entire experience bringing back the concert we experienced 2 years ago. I can even feel my chest tighten a little as they finish up the photos on stage.
They all start to move towards the other side of the stage before pausing. I find myself confused as Taka grabs the mic, "Hello Boston. I know that was supposed to be our last song, but I have one more thing I'd like to do if you're willing to indulge me. And for this to be successful, I'd like everyone who can to take pictures, live stream, video tape, whatever you need to do to help document this moment."
There's screams throughout the theater. The house lights go back down and multiple members of the crew step out onto the stage to clear the fan art. I watch, brows furrowed as Toru and Ryota are given their instruments. Tomoya also moves around the stage to sit back at the drum set. I try to glance back at the staff member with me, but he shakes his head, pointing back towards the stage, "I'd stay focused there."
I look back, watching Taka's side profile. He's got a huge smile on his face, "It's been 2 years since we last performed here. I still can't believe it. That night changed a lot in my life." I find myself gasping as my mind tries to connect the dots. No. He couldn't be doing this here. "So with that same mindset, I thought why not move into the next chapter of my life in the same place where it started." He's all smiles and I watch him glance towards me, giving a small wink. He refocuses on the crowd, "It all started with a medical room last time, and holding someone's hand. Then I made one of the most reckless decisions in my life of following that person home. From there, a lot of it became history."
There's a shove to my back as Taka extends a hand towards me, "Go." Is whispered by the same stage hand.
"Love." Taka calls, and I can hear multiple gasps throughout the theater. I'm not sure how my legs keep me upright as I move out onto stage. My skin flushing as I try to ignore all the stares. His smile turns soft, like the one I've seen a thousand times over voice chats or while we sit together late at night, cuddling and laughing at a random show on the tv when we'd visit each other. I find myself answering with the same smile that would grace my face during those moments. He holds a hand out to me and I take it, giving him a tight squeeze when I feel the slight trembling. I want to give him strength, knowing how hard this can be for him sometimes. We'd talked endlessly about panic attacks and triggers for the two of us. I can still remember crying with him as we held each other one night, just a little to lost in a bottle of wine after a long month. And as much as my eyes want to shift towards the rest of the crowd, I keep them focused right on him. Refusing to let him go as he leads me to stand up on the center elevated stage dedicated to him for singing.
"Taka." I whisper, knowing he can't here me, but loving the way his smile just turns absolutely love sick when he reads my lips.
"You have given me so much over these past two years. Everything I could have asked for. Supporting me every way you could and loving me even with how broken I am." I shake my head, but he cuts me off, "No matter how much you try to deny it. I've fall in love with our late nights. With our screaming car rides. With the way you fan girl over kpop groups. And the way you argue with the actors when we watch shows. I fallen so madly in love with every piece of you, and the fact our brokenness makes each other whole. Which is why..." He pauses, getting down onto one knee, and I can hear the deafening screams coming from the crowd as my right hand flies up to cover my mouth, "I'm hoping you'll make me the happiest man alive and say yes to being mine forever. Will you marry me?" He pulls out a ring box I hadn't even seen him grab, holding it open to me.
I feel the tears in the corner of my eyes, my head nodding, "Yes. Yes!" I yell and start to laugh as he slides the ring home. He stands up and I find myself wrapping my arms around him, pressing kisses to his face before I stop myself, remembering how against PDA he is. I get ready to start apologizing, but he pulls me back to him, pressing a deep kiss to my lips. He leans his forehead against mine, smiling.
We pull back from each other and Taka goes to display me to the crowd, "I'd like to introduce you to my fiancé." I can feel myself flushing again at the amount of cameras going off an people screaming. I step back a bit, and Taka lets me, keeping my hand held in his as I step down off the platform. He gives me another smile before turning back to the crowd, "Now, we're going to play one more song. It's my fiancé's favorite from that concert 2 years ago." I hear the crowd start to scream as the opening melody of the song starts to play.
Taka smiles at me, noticing my eyes going wide as he lifts the mic back to his face and starts to sing to me.
Life can be heavy
Time can be scary
Days around the sun
Battles to be won
If love is war
Come crash into my vacant arms
Embrace, explore
We're supernova racing
He moves towards me, the two of us jumping around as I sing the chorus along with him, though I make sure to avoid getting anywhere near the actual mic. I make sure to point towards him during the line "you matter to me." wanting to make sure there's nothing lost during translation
Do I matter to you? Do I matter to you?
Do I matter to you-ooh-ooh?
You matter to me, you matter to me
You matter and we all matter
Do I matter to you? Do I matter to you?
Do I matter to you-ooh-ooh?
You matter to me, you matter to me
You matter and we all matter
Should we be sharing
All that we carry?
I know songs have been sung
But change is yet to come
If love is war
Come crash into my vacant arms
The space we ignore
Is the answer to our fading
Do I matter to you? Do I matter to you?
Do I matter to you-ooh-ooh?
You matter to me, you matter to me
You matter and we all matter
Do I matter to you? Do I matter to you?
Do I matter to you-ooh-ooh?
You matter to me, you matter to me
You matter and we all matter
Left to right, will you take
Will you take my hand?
He reaches a hand out to me, and I grab it. Holding on as he sings towards me.
Hold it tight, feel the waste
As our atoms collide
He pulls me back towards the center of the stage as we start to get ready to jump around for the last chorus again
Do you sing, do you sing when you look within?
Is it faith, is it hate pulling you back in?
Do you wanna believe there's a war to win?
Do you wanna believe? You matter to me
Do I matter to you?
Do I matter to you-ooh-ooh?
You matter to me, you matter to me
You matter and we all matter
Do I matter to you? Do I matter to you?
Do I matter to you-ooh-ooh?
You matter to me, you matter to me
You matter and we all matter
Do you sing, do you sing when you look within?
Is it faith, is it hate pulling you back in?
Do you wanna believe there's a war to win?
Do you wanna believe? You matter to me
+Matter by One Ok Rock
I smile at him as he wraps his arms around me. I press another kiss to his lips, feeling the crowd cheer. Taka lifts the mic one last time, "Thank you everyone and have a wonderful rest of your night." He moves so only one of his arms is wrapped around my waist as he helps usher me off stage. He doesn't let go, even as numerous other people come up to congratulate us.
When we end up back at his hotel room for the night, I smile at him, curling up into his side, "Thank you."
He just laughs, "You deserved to be shown off."
I glance up at him, "Still. Thank you. It was an amazing proposal. I couldn't have asked for anything better." I lean up, kissing him again, "I love you."
He smiles, "Love you too."
--
I wake up the next morning to Taka laughing. Groaning, I go to throw a pillow at him, but he deflects it, "You're gonna want to see this." He calls, before shoving a phone in my face.
It seems that twitter has been blowing up, but the post he's directing me to is a photo I know all to well. It's the two of us surrounded by the 8 members of Ateez. Taka is glaring at Wooyoung who tried to get a little too close to me for his liking. I'm laughing at the two of them. I check who posted it, my eyes widening as I see it's the official Ateez account, "Congrats on your engagement. So excited we got to meet you and the misses two years ago. Take good care of our Atiny!"
I glance up at Taka, "They can't be serious."
Taka just shrugs, "They probably just wanted to make sure everyone knew they knew about us first." He leans down to kiss me, but mutters, "They're wrong though, your mine, not theirs, and I've got the ring to prove it."