Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“STAY CALM, DON’T PANIC!”

The simultaneous shrieking sounds of alarms going off felt subdued and slow in Stanley’s ears. The scientists barely had time to scream as they focused on saving what could be saved, tucking their research papers on their beings, securing them as if they were their precious children. Their indistinct cries and hurried steps mingled with the monotonous AI voice that announced the breach in the security.

“Captain Snyder,” a soldier deplored. He looked at his captain with a neutral expression, but his tone betrayed a slight sense of apprehension.

“Hurry! You know where to go,” Stanley replied.

“But—”

Explosions roared, followed by crashing sounds. With a quake, the heavy metal doors revealed a huge hole, letting clouds of smoke wander in. A series of heavy footsteps thundered on the floor alongside the sharp whistle of gunshots. Stanley estimated their number and their weapons, and snickered darkly.

He turned his attention to the soldier and said, “That’s an order. Take them,” Stanley motioned with his head at the panicking and screaming scientists. “Keep them safe.”

The soldier tightened his grip on his rifle and beckoned his fellow soldiers over to guide the scientists before saluting his captain and going without turning back.

Stanley grinned. After putting his cigarette out with his shoe, he grabbed a table near him, flipped it sideways, and used it as a cover. He cocked his gun and aimed at the moving shadows meters from where he was. The firing exchange ensued, bullets raining down on him without a pause.

Stains of crimson muddied his vision, but his shots were perfect, precise, not a shot wasted. Some of the enemy’s bullets grazed him here and there and probably hit him on the shoulder, but it was no big deal. He believed he still had the whole thing in control. With the time he had bought, he quietly inferred that his soldiers had already gotten the scientists to the safety point.

After a moment of silence, he walked over the corpses of their mysterious assailants and noted their appearances. Five armed men clad in black tactical gear. They wore odd-looking masks that covered their faces entirely. Stanley thought that whoever designed those masks either possessed a poor sense of fashion or just couldn’t be bothered enough to care, for they just sucked that bad. The gray masks were smooth and shiny with fur surrounding their edges; their shape resembled an eerily smiling ape. A bold black zigzag line ran across them.

Stanley looked more closely at the odd lines. “Were they supposed to look like petrification marks?” he thought.

He stored his gun in his holster and picked up some of the intruders’ rifles on the ground. How he wished he could go grab his personal sniper rifle, too, while he was at it, but there was simply no time for that.

He must go to his side.

He carefully suppressed his breath as he surveyed his surroundings. Aside from the mysterious attackers, lay an unmoving woman in a white coat. He crouched down and felt for her pulse. Stanley bit his lip. She was already gone, most likely caught up in the explosion earlier. He recognized this young intern who came to the science facility a few weeks back. He thought she wasn’t that remarkable, so he didn’t really bother remembering her name, but the cups of coffee she kindly offered to him while he waited for Xeno weren’t half bad.

Stanley positioned the young intern’s body so she lay horizontally. He brushed his palm through her lids to close her shocked eyes. This way, she would look like she was only sleeping after a long shift at work.

---

The facility entered its lockdown state. The blaring sirens and red flashes continued to fill the surroundings. The smell of blood, Stanley wasn’t unfamiliar with. It wasn’t even an exaggeration to say he was long used to it. Mixed with the scent of gunpowder and burning metal, he could almost let his mind wander to the past, when he was deployed abroad by the military. Not the fondest memories he had, but it grounded him and helped steady his feet.

However, the closer he drew to his destination, the heavier the air felt, and the more he tried to convince himself to stay calm, the more he could feel his anxiety growing. Several people wearing white coats—or now red, splayed over the long hallways like a river of red, flowing in the opposite direction of his trek. He found it harder to lift his legs with each step, and if he dared stop walking, he thought the river could fully wash him away and lead him far deeper to drown.

His gaze would rest upon each of the faces in the river with trepidation.

He was usually pretty confident in his intuition, but just for now, he hoped it was wrong.

Cautiously, he quickened his pace to the innermost part of the facility, shooting at some attackers along his way. His heart almost dropped when he reached the entrance of the lab.

“Why are you still here?!”

Chrome looked at him with dazed, red-rimmed eyes. “Stanley? Oh, that’s goo—” Coughing, he threw himself at the soldier and vomited some blood. Stanley scrunched his brows but said nothing. He supported him with his right hand while the other pressed hard on the hole in his stomach. “As long as we… still have someone on our side, we can win, just like before,” the scientist continued.

Stanley almost shook the man in spite of himself. “What happened? Why haven’t you evacuated?!”

“Senku…” Chrome inhaled a deep breath, and after a minute, finally exhaled. His voice cracked as he continued, “Senku told me they were an army of ‘an-teez’? No idea what that means, but anyways.... They’re after Why-Man and the time machine.”

Stanley observed the young scientist and leaned him against the wall, sitting. They both knew he wasn’t going to last long. “Where are Senku and Xeno?”

Chrome smiled bitterly, and Stanley now truly felt his heart drop. Chrome pointed toward the inner part of the lab. Before running toward it, Stanley’s gaze lingered on the dying scientist. “I’ll save everyone,” he said firmly.

“As long as we have the petri-device, we can revive anyone,” Stanley thought more to comfort himself than to rationalize their current state. The situation was under control—it better had to.

Chrome didn’t reply or perhaps no longer had the ability to do so, but his eyes glistened as they reflected hope. He gave Stanley a light tap on the chest, and not a minute after, he stopped breathing.

Stanley stood up and ran in the direction Chrome pointed.

___

Senku was dead.

Stanley didn’t have to check his pulse and breathing to know. Three shots in the head. It was an instant death. He lay swimming in his own pool of blood with his eyes closed. He had his left hand clutching his mantle, around the area where he drew E = mc².

Stanley’s breath hitched. He himself couldn’t name what he was feeling at the moment. Anger and confusion bubbled up inside him as he stared at the dead scientist. How dare they kill the brat, and how dare that same brat die from shots fired by a bunch of nobodies when he had clearly escaped death from him before? Stanley tried to wrap his mind around the situation, but to no avail. He sucked in cold breath and pressed his thumb and fingers on his blood shot eyes.

He circled the cold body as he looked for something else. On his way, he saw several fallen and broken petrified bodies of attackers five meters from Senku. He could imagine how the whole scene unfolded and tried to replay it in his mind. And just like he guessed, near Senku’s feet was a broken capsule. Stanley picked it up. The container was there, but the Medusa device itself was missing. Where could it possibly be? He once again stared at Senku on the floor. Would Ishigami Senku go down without an arduous fight against all odds despite his infamous bad luck?

So, he bent near his body and thought deeply.

After a while, he pried open Senku’s hand, which clenched Einstein’s equation. If there was something the scientist would 10 billion percent put his high hopes on, it would without a doubt fall on just one thing: science. True enough, Stanley found something. He tilted his head in confusion while he stared at the small piece of diamond in his hand. It was so small that he could have missed it if its spark hadn’t blinded him for a moment. He quickly wiped the blood off it with his sleeve and secured it in his pocket, hoping it wouldn’t get lost.

Stanley’s sharp senses warned him of someone’s presence. He steadied his aim and shot without hesitation. The attacker’s body collapsed and hit the ground with a loud thud. Following that, he proceeded to go to the laboratory’s left wing, where the incomplete time machine was situated.

From his conversation earlier with Chrome and from what he saw of the merciless handling of their leading scientist, their enemies were a bunch of fools who abhorred science to their core and were against any technological advancement in their new world. Their abominable masks made his deduction evident enough. Stanley scoffed at how ironic they seemed by using guns and grenades to realize their cause and wondered if they themselves could see through their hypocrisy. But on second thought, if he saw them come to ambush them with sticks and stones, he would have definitely laughed at their faces. However, if that were the case, he would at least give them an A+ for creativity and consistency.

He didn’t know how they managed to revive these types of people in the first place, but figured it was now useless to dwell on that. He had already concluded that they had a mole on their side, for they knew exactly where and when they would be vulnerable and when he was away from Xeno’s side. Stanley bit his lip until it bled on the thought.

Their enemies were the type that Xeno would hate so much that he would be able to speak unspeakable things regardless of whether they were elegant or not. He was certain Xeno would want to wipe their existence on Earth without any hint of hesitation. Of course, he would be willing to help him with that; it reminded him of the good old days.

Xeno.

He couldn’t see the man anywhere. He tried to keep his mind busy while he marched through the laboratory, but it didn’t help with his thumping heart. He tried calling his number, but was only met with the scientist's pre-recorded voicemail message: “You’ve reached Dr. X. I would love to answer, but I would love prioritizing the laws of physics more. However, if your IQ level is higher or equal to mine, then go ahead and state your business after the beep.”

Stanley almost jolted as he was brought back to reality with a scurrying sound. He reached his destination and beheld the huge machine in front of him. He held his ground, for he knew his ears didn’t betray him. Then, he heard a glass shatter behind the time machine. Not a second after, a single gunshot was fired at him. With the sweet, familiar sound, Stanley evaded it with little to no effort.

Careful of making any sounds with his steps, he walked closer to his adversary. The shadow was caught unawares of the soldier and immediately drew his revolver, pointing it a little bit upward (for he was sitting down on the floor) to aim at Stanley’s chest.

Stanley gripped the man’s revolver barrel. “Xeno, it’s me.”

The man started at the call of his name, his fierce expression visibly softening. He slowly lowered his gun, and his stiff body went mushy. Stanley crouched beside him and pulled the man to his chest. Xeno took a deep, rough breath in, grounding himself with the soldier’s tobacco scent. He embraced Stanley tightly as he could, as if someone or something would part them if he didn’t hold hard enough. Stanley wouldn’t let anyone dare, though, for he returned the gesture almost equally.

“Stan, you’re here.”

“Yeah, I’m here.”

After a while, Xeno himself hesitantly parted from their embrace and stared at Stanley’s face. He cupped his man’s cheek and said, “You look scary, Stan. Your eyes are red. Your lips are also bleeding.”

“Are they?” Stanley replied. He wasn’t aware of them until now.

Xeno nodded. “You’re also bleeding here.” He lightly placed his other hand on Stanley’s shoulder, and the man shuddered with his cold touch.

“It’s no big deal,” the soldier said. “More importantly, you—” Stanley looked at Xeno, and his heart ached a million times over.

Xeno looked paper pale that the bags under his eyes appeared darker than usual. His lips were uncharacteristically purple. They looked so cold and lonely that Stanley couldn’t help but lean in and share his heat with them. He pressed his lips tenderly on the other’s. Soon enough, Xeno’s lips glowed with some red color, albeit with the blood that he forgot he had on his lips. It stained Xeno’s lips and trickled down his chin. His gaze followed down upon it until it stopped on his bare neck. Stanley winced at the sight. It could be his primal instinct that went active at their current situation, but the thought to chomp down on the white skin was strong. However, the better part of his brain yelled at him alarmingly.

Not in a million years could anyone convince Xeno to wear his collars loosely. It was only now that he noticed that the scientist wasn’t wearing his iconic white lab coat. Anxiously but with an obvious sense of urgency, he unbuttoned the scientist’s shirt. He practically growled when he saw the other’s chest wrapped with something hastily put together. The dark and shiny material clung firmly around his chest along with a cloth he couldn’t discern the original color of because of the absurd amount of blood. The blood continuously dripped down his chest to his stomach, wetting even his pants. “WHAT IS THIS?!”

“I had no choice,” Xeno replied coolly. “Desperate times call for desperate measures. It doesn’t look elegant, but duct tape was the only thing I had on hand.”

Stanley stood up, starting Xeno up. “Tell me where you keep your first aid kit and medicine.”

Xeno chuckled at his words, but not to mock him. “It’s no use. The bullet pierced through the hilar region of my lungs. It’s a miracle I’m still alive, and even more so, able to speak. I’m running on full adrenaline earlier.”

“Xeno...”

Xeno looked at his lover with a soft expression. “Don’t look at me like that, Stan. Come, help me get up, and let’s get to business, shall we?”

Stanley supported Xeno with his arms. The latter could feel the rough breathing of the other; if one looked at them from afar, they might mistake Stanley to be the one with lung complications.

“We can still use that petrifying device,” Stanley said and paused. “And revive those who couldn’t make it, right?”

How Xeno wished Stanley could see how pitiful he looked right now. He didn’t have the courage to shatter his hopes and tell him ‘no,’ but he didn’t have a choice. Instead of directly telling him the answer, he asked another question. “You mean this?” Xeno said as he fished a broken mineral from his pocket.

“Is that--?”

“Yes, it’s Why-Man. Senku threw it in my direction in his last breath, but it fell into the hands of one of those apes instead, and he broke it after they couldn’t use it properly. Hah! They’re literal apes who know nothing. Well, going back… As you know, without the vacuum capsule, Why-Man is just a piece of rock who couldn’t harm anyone without a command, so they broke it quite easily. I skidded through a horde of them to collect it.” Xeno smiled bitterly. “But a bullet hit me, how pathetic.”

Stanley massaged Xeno’s hand.

“I thought I could still fix it, but I noticed it lacked the most important thing. Its diamond battery is missing. It might have dropped when--”

“Wait!” Stanley’s eyes lit up, and he immediately felt through his pockets. Xeno watched him flop like a fish with an unamused expression. “This, right? I knew that brat won’t go down without a fight.”

Xeno removed his gloves and seized the diamond. “Elegant, Stan! As expected of my ultimate knight! Did Senku take precautions in case it fell into those apes? That explains why they couldn’t use it.”

Before Stanley could sigh a breath of relief, however, they heard the alarms go off once more, the siren echoed painfully in their ears. Stanley entered a defensive stance and brought Xeno behind himself. Footsteps reverberated on the tiled floor, and they both tightened their expressions. Just how many of them are there?

“How many minutes would you need to fix that?” Stanley asked.

“Give me 15—no, 10 minutes! Keep them at least 3 meters away from the time machine.”

“Roger that.”

Behind the time machine, Stanley readied his weapon and began a 1 vs 50 fight, and Xeno picked his fight with time. His breathing was growing laborious, and his vision was beginning to dim. He shook his head to concentrate.

___

“How’s it?!” Stanley asked.

Xeno didn’t reply. eight minutes had already passed. He managed to fix the Medusa a minute ago, but it wouldn’t respond to him at all. Why? Where could the error lie? What could he have overlooked? Xeno crossed his fingers in an ‘X’ in front of him and began to analyze.

10 minutes had passed.

“Xeno!”

Stanley found it hard to hold on. While the huge time machine shielded them from most bullets, some strays still hit his body, blotting his clothes with dark red. It was fortunate that their enemies didn’t seem to want to damage the time machine so much, as they could just use grenades if they wanted. He threw the rifle he was holding and replaced it with Xeno’s revolver. He was running out of ammunition and weapons.

“Stan.”

“Are you done?”

“It’s not going to work.”

Stanley threw him a quick glance. The scientist looked even paler than before. He was heaving deeply, his eyes lost all light.

“Why-Man won’t ever come back.”

Stanley’s eyes contracted.

Xeno continued, “The promise back then was made between Why-Man and Senku alone. You must know it since you were a witness with Kohaku, Stan. With Senku dead, the promise Why-Man had with humanity is also broken.”

“Well, Shit.”

“Yeah, shit it is.”

Xeno almost fell on the ground, but he tried to steady himself. Dizziness enveloped him, yet he stood still. Walking beside the time machine, he stepped on a certain mechanism on the ground, and a huge red button presented itself in front of him. Stanley eyed the scene, dividing his attention between their enemies and the mysterious button.

Xeno looked at the strong yet tired back of Stanley. He closed his eyes and asked, “Stan, do you trust me?”

“Yes, I do,” Stanley declared without a moment of hesitation.

Xeno pressed the button, and everything went pitch dark. Xeno used the darkness to disorient their enemies as more alarms went off. Meanwhile, Stanley closed his eyes to get used to the dark. He felt Xeno’s cold hands lead him somewhere. He could hear gunshots, but the confused apes were too cautious to come near them. When he opened his adjusted eyes, he saw Xeno push him. He barely had time to process what was happening when he fell on his back, but didn’t get hurt. Instead, he saw himself inside a cockpit, the glass enclosure already closing, trapping him inside.

“XENO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

“DO YOU TRUST ME OR NOT?!” Xeno repeated.

“Yes, but—”

“Then listen to me carefully. I’m going to send you back in the past.”

Stanley slowly blinked. He looked at Xeno through the glass. He couldn’t quite see his face, but he could feel the resolute tone in his weak and quivering voice. He kept his mouth shut and gulped.

“To be more precise, I will send your consciousness to your past self. I want to tell you more about how this works, but to my dismay, we are truly short on time.”

Stanley giggled despite their current predicament. “Yeah, man, keep it short.” He clutched his fist to his chest and lowered his head.

Xeno sighed. “Before, we received a message from the future, but realized it was all a sham caused by Why-Man. However, because of that, the progress of this project had been smooth as ever, and transporting and acquiring resources suddenly became too easy for us.”

Stanley listened without interrupting the scientist, but thought it would be nice to do a better job of hurrying up.

“The original time machine is supposed to be erected on the surface of the moon, but that is still a process in the making. What we see here right now is merely a prototype for the actual machine. What I want to do seems quite far-fetched, but this is a situation I’m willing to gamble with science as my ace.  As the time machine was originally created to work with Why-Man into account, it’s supposed to work similarly. I extracted the diamond earlier and used it as the main catalyst. However, this doesn’t mean it’s complete, the energy required for a single instance is a far cry from what we have in our hands, so instead of having your whole body travel, it would only be your mind that is going back.”

Stanley tried to absorb the information. “So, basically a time leap, yeah?”

“Yes.”

“Alright, tell me what I need to do.”

Xeno coughed before he answered. “I will send you back around when we were both 20 years old or later. I would already be working for NASA by that time, so we would have all the resources we would need. I’ll try to make it so that it would be before the petrification to make things less difficult. Although it might be a little bit inconvenient for you because you were serving the military at that time but I don’t doubt your abilities. Go find me and let me help you make a time machine, and no, not exactly like this one, but a machine that could send messages to the future.” Xeno paused to breathe. I don’t want to risk other external factors meddling with the message if we use Morse code. So, send the message directly to my smartphone and warn me of the attack months or--- no, with the percentage error, even days before it happens would suffice. I’m certain that I could make safety measures afterward to salvage this—whatever this is.”

“Wait, Xeno. If that’s the plan, isn’t it better to have you go back in time instead of me? Since you already know how to make the machine.”

“That sounds logical, Stan.”

“Then, why?”

The lights began to flicker again. But instead of reds, the lights were green and came from inside the cockpit; it reminded him of the green light of that particular day. Stanley’s eyes immediately looked for Xeno, and there, he saw him staring at him through the window. He was wearing headphones, which explained why he could hear him crystal clear despite being separated by the thick metal and glass. His lips were stained with blood, and he leaned on the nearest support he could reach. He entered a coughing fit and fell on his knees.

“XENO!”

Xeno spat some blood and tried to stand up. He stared at Stanley with a smile that Stanley could barely understand the meaning of. “Unfortunately, for this time machine to work, someone had to operate and input the calculations on the spot from the outside. Since you can’t do that, the role would, of course, fall on me. Besides,” Xeno said. “Let’s not ignore the elephant in the room, I’m dying.”

“…”

Unbothered by the silence, Xeno took a small notebook from his pocket and tore a piece from it. He showed it to Stanley. “Take a good look—these are the schematics for the time machine.”

“Alright,” Stanley managed to say, but his voice obviously cracked.

“Memorize it or just remember it as much as you can. Show it to the past version of me, and he’ll be sure to help you.”

Stanley nodded as he stared at the piece of paper. He could barely see it from the heat that was starting to flow from his eyes, but for Xeno’s sake, he forced them from coming out and wiped the blurry vision with his palm. “Got it.”

“Since this so-called time leap will be a first, I can’t guarantee how safe it'll be. It might affect your cognition, but don’t worry, I’ll minimize the risks through my calculations. Just to be safe, I’ll set the limit for two months. Within these two months, complete your mission. After the time runs out, your mind will be sent back to the present, or for you, to the future. Stan, are you listening?”

“Hmn.”

“Good,” Xeno replied. “Also... be careful what you say to the past version of me. The less you reveal about the future, the better. Every choice you make risks creating a new branch. As someone who believes in the many-worlds theory, I know we might already be in a split reality...but I’m not ready to abandon this one, not like this. If we want to steer this timeline toward the outcome we’re hoping for, we have to avoid introducing too many—"

“Yeah, got it, Xeno. Don’t speak anymore,” Stanley said. He couldn’t hear it, but he knew the laboratory was now filled with the sounds of gunshots.

“Stanley Snyder.”

“Yeah?”

Xeno coughed out a mouthful of blood before he could say anything. “Go meet me in the past and do what you must do. Can you do that?”

Stanley slightly hit the glass that kept them apart with his fist. He raised his head and locked eyes with his lover. “Yes, I can,” he replied.

With that, Xeno turned his back on him and focused his attention on the various levers and buttons on the time machine. Meanwhile, Stanley lit a cigarette in his mouth (surprisingly, Xeno didn’t say anything about it). The scientist gave him further instructions as he also did his calculations. After completing everything, he heard Xeno start the countdown, starting from 10.

10. 9. 8. 7. 6...

The first five seconds flew by quickly, neither of them didn’t even noticed it. They even managed to throw an inside joke within the passing. They both laughed and smiled, but Stanley's eyes hurt so badly.

5

Stanley gritted his teeth. He focused his attention in front of him, refusing to turn his head to the scientist as he closed his eyes.

4

A bullet buried itself in Xeno.

3

And another one.

2

And another.

1

“See you later, Xeno,” Stanley said as his consciousness drifted off.

Chapter Text

This so-called time leap was entirely different from the sci-fi movies and tearjerker anime Stanley watched during his teens. They make it seem like everything seemed to warp at once, and ‘Voila! Teleported back from the past or to the future!’ The characters would probably feel dizzy at first, but the next moment, they were walking as if they just didn’t quite literally propel themselves into a black hole… or a wormhole. Stanley’s first time travel experience, however, felt sickening.

Stanley Snyder was a proud soldier who was unknown to seasickness or motion sickness, but his current state introduced him to both in the front row in a VIP seat. His mind continuously drifted between consciousness and unconsciousness every now and then. He held onto the metal support on his sides, but they weren’t enough to prevent his body from shooting forward. He closed his eyes to alleviate the pain and dizziness the whole thing caused, but when he tried to open his eyes for the experience, he saw pure shocking white instead of black. The harsh light shone and enveloped him, and he thought he had gone blind.

His perception of time was also distorted, for he swore it had been at least five minutes since the time machine successfully finished its countdown. But at the same time, he felt like it was just a few seconds ago. It was as if he were high, drunk, and sleepy all at the same time. Honestly, it was just that amazing, but not really because it was agonizing.

If he could describe it, it was as if his head were his feet and his feet were his head. Then, his hands would be nonexistent because they were dead numb. Instead, his stomach felt like it had grown into a person of its own, with how it kept churning and turning inside him as if begging to be let out of his thick abs. In short, he almost wanted to die.

So, it was no wonder that when he felt his consciousness finally settle, he faceplanted directly to the ground. His forehead burned, and he hissed in pain. The plastic bag he was suddenly carrying was thrown to the side, its contents proudly broadcasting themselves beside him.

On a breezy summer night, Stanley Snyder found himself sprawled out on the empty streets with the bent lamppost as his only confidant. The way it flickered intermittently made it seem like it was laughing at him, and it annoyed him terribly. Fortunately for the lamppost, he was currently indisposed, or else, it would now lie horizontally alongside him.

“Ugh.”

Well, at least the time travel was successful? He guessed it was safe to assume so. He could slowly but surely feel himself sobering up. He should be happy about it, but some people just don’t process things that easily. If Xeno or Senku were here instead of him, they would surely celebrate another win for humanity for successfully unlocking the mysteries behind time travel. He imagined they would gush over the fact that they were the first ones to get the novel and grand experience. However, he wasn’t Senku or Xeno. He was Stanley, who felt conflicted at his current situation.

He let himself lie on his stomach. He didn’t care if a few passersby looked at him weird, for he didn’t really have the privilege to care. Let them think he was a drunkard who fell in love with a cockroach on the ground and dived in for its kiss for all he cared. That was beyond the point.

Yes, he could feel the throbbing on his bleeding forehead, could smell the earthy and pungent smell of asphalt on his face, could hear the mosquitoes whispering profanities in his ears, could taste the faint flavor of tobacco on his tongue, and most of all, could see how pathetic and miserable he must look right now. However, the thing was, it still didn’t feel right, like wearing clothes that didn’t quite fit him. In the end, Stanley dismissed it with a simple conjecture that his mind was likely merging with his current body, and therefore, still in the process of adjusting. After all, his head hurt so bad he almost wanted to vomit.

After what felt like forever, Stanley was forced to turn his body so he could breathe properly. The sky was dull and bleak. How boring, he thought. He could make out five or six stars with the naked eye, and they definitely paled in comparison to the night sky he and Xeno saw on the first night after they were de-petrified.

He raised a hand to the sky. Unlike the underwhelming stars above, the moon alone remained beautiful. He tried reaching out to it, but his arms were too short. The moon stared at him from above with a condescending attitude, either mocking his current state or reproaching him for ending up in his current state. He was certain that if he focused his mind on it enough, he could even hear its cold voice. He imagined the exasperated tone it would use and the amusement it could rouse in him.

Stanley laughed—the full moon seemed out of his reach. He had set foot on it in the past, or in his case, right now, in the future, so he knew how far it was from Earth. The space travel from Earth to the moon took a few days, he remembered. Tonight, however, it looked particularly far, so far that it could almost make him cry. So, he cried.

Hot liquid wetted his cheeks, and his throat complained of a pain that wanted to be let out. It had been a while since he last cried, so he wasn’t quite sure if he should close or open his mouth to relish in the full crying session. He settled with the quiet sobs; he didn’t want to risk other people interrupting him. For now, he wanted to be alone with the moon. He stared at it with his red-rimmed eyes. And the moon offered him its white light as a comfort, and despite its piercing gaze, it warmed his heart, knowing that even though it seemed so far, it was still there.

Stanley almost choked at his own tears when somebody clasped his raised hand.

“What are you doing, Stan? I thought you went out to buy some ice cream?”

Pitch-black eyes peered down at him, blocking the moon’s light from above. “Goodness, Stan, you’re bleeding. Are you crying? Does your forehead hurt that badly? Are you a kid?” the man said and questioned without a pause, scrunching his thick eyebrows in concern and reproach.

Stanley stared at Xeno for a while before he began to wipe his tears with his other hand and realized that his forehead was wet too. He pulled his shirt and began wiping his whole face. Now, not only was his face ruined, but his shirt was too.

He answered, “I was crying cuz the moon’s so damn faaaar.”

Xeno was obviously taken aback by how his hand tightened around Stanley’s. “Well, that’s true. To be exact, it’s 384,399 kilometers away from Earth on average.”

Stanley let an unamused “hm.”

Xeno didn’t let go of Stanley’s hand. He whipped his head upward and stared at the same moon that made his best friend cry. “Oh, I reckon tonight might be the lunar apogee. Ever heard of it, Stan? It’s the period when the moon reaches its farthest point from Earth. Hold on, let me figure it out,” Xeno said as he also raised a hand above, hooking the moon with his thumb at the angle. He continued, “Hm, you’re right, it’s far. I estimate that it’s approximately 405,491 kilometers away from Earth right now.”

Stanley would let out a boisterous laugh if not for the dryness of his throat. He coughed, and Xeno shifted his gaze from the moon to him. “But with science, that distance is nothing. In just a few years, more countries other than the US and Russia will soon successfully land on the moon,” he said softly.

“Yeah, sure.”

“Right?” Xeno huffed slightly. “So, Stan, you don’t have to cry over that.” The moonlight kissed Xeno’s silver hair, and from Stanley’s perspective, he looked blinding. He squinted his poor, strained eyes from the sight. They still felt hot from before, but that was just an excuse. He knew they were hot for a different reason.

He smiled. “You’re so right. Just realized that now, actually.” His voice came out strained and rough.

“That is—?”

“That the moon’s closer than I thought.”

___

Stanley observed the nostalgic room. He called himself lucky for being nursed by the owner of the bed he was currently sitting on. Beside the bed rested a computer loading some letters and numbers that were beyond his understanding, and on its side, huge shelves stood menacingly. The books were neatly arranged in it, but some of them were just scattered open on the carpeted floor. Aside from the books, the floor also seemed to house several science tools and equipment varying from a huge telescope near the window to the world’s smallest screw and screwdriver.

Despite the mess, the room itself smelled nice. And he wasn’t being weird about it. The air in Xeno’s room smelled like disinfectant, a very clean scent. But it wasn’t the type that one could smell in general hospitals or sickbays. It didn’t elicit dread. There was something homey about it. He would give up smoking (only in this room, of course) just to preserve the precious scent.

Lost in those thoughts, Stanley swayed his legs back and forth. After a while, it ultimately hit the leg of the person standing in front of him.

“Can you, like, stop that?” Xeno complained as he plastered the huge adhesive bandage on Stanley’s forehead. “Honestly, just stop moving altogether. This is almost done.” As he plastered the last one, Xeno observed his work for a while, and seeing it perfect as it should be, he couldn’t help but flick it nicely with all the strength his thumb and finger could muster; it’s a little payback for kicking his leg. Stanley obviously didn’t appreciate that and groaned in response. He sharply leaned his body backward and ended up lying on the bed with his hands over his forehead.

“Please stop exaggerating. You’re not a kid,” Xeno said.

“Oh, yeah? You try kissing the ground next time.”

Pretending to think, Xeno put a hand on his chin and replied, “I think I’ll pass.”

“Yep, cuz you obviously prefer kissing and smacking your huge forehead to your keyboard after long nights of overworking.” Stanley shot the hardworking computer a glance.

Xeno eyed him darkly. His offended stare could make anyone shiver from its coldness. However, the young scientist didn’t look threatening to Stanley at all. Instead, it even fueled him to tease him further. “Am I wrong?” he asked. After contemplating, he added, “Or would you prefer kissing me instead?”

It was just for a while, but Stanley saw the shift from coldness to heat in the scientist’s eyes. Xeno avoided eye contact and laid his gaze upon the ceiling. “Can you ever be serious? I don’t want to hear anything from a man who tripped over nothing,” he said. Ignoring the last part of his question, he answered, “For your information, that only happened thrice, Stan. Contrary to your expectations, I’m not that fond of smacking my face to the keyboard.”

“Heh, that so?

Stanley grinned as he looked at Xeno. The scientist was wearing a classic white lab coat draped over a black turtleneck that hugged his body in a perfect fit. His trousers, also black but less pigmented, reached just below his waist and were tightened by a thick leather belt. His youthful appearance was nice to see. His eyes sparkled with great aspirations yet to be realized. They influenced him to feel excited with them. Aside from appearing younger, Xeno’s features didn’t change much, aside from the absence of a conspicuous ‘X’ mark on his cute little forehead. Last but not least, his pompadour, while it hadn’t reached its fullest potential and final evolution yet, still looked proud and plumpy as ever.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” the object of his carried away staring inquired with judging eyes.

Stanley gulped slowly. His eyes darted all over the room, but in the end, still ended up on Xeno.

His hands itched more than his bandaged forehead. They longed to touch him, pleaded to hold him. He wanted to cage his cheeks with his palms so they would never know what cold felt like. He was desperate to bring their faces together, so he could feel their hot breaths intermingling with each other. He could also grab his waist and draw it closer to his chest, so his weight could settle on his body and cushion him from when Fate threw him into an undesirable situation. Finally, he could intertwine their fingers together and glue them nicely. That way, he could never be far from his reach again.

Stanley promised he could listen to this person’s heartbeat forever if the other kindly allowed him, making it the only genre of music he could ever bear to listen to. His eyes, too, followed each of his movements, and if possible, he wanted to etch them deeply to his memory so he could replay them in his head whenever, like from the tendency of his lips to curve slightly to the right whenever he opens his mouth, to the animated way his brows could speak for themselves every time they express their thoughts without uttering a single word. He would even freely let that pair of voids entrap him in their snare if that was what it took to make them stay their gaze on him a little bit longer.

Stanley swore he could abide by them as if they were laws and he, a good citizen. No, he was confident that he would do them as if they were natural to him as breathing.

Yet, he pushed those desires close to his heart but far from Xeno’s.

From the moment he settled his thoughts earlier, he already knew—this young version of Xeno wasn’t yet aware of his feelings. He double-checked the date on his phone earlier, so he knew. In this timeline, they were still best friends who cared deeply and trusted each other like no other, but were yet to give their deep relationship a name. His heart ached with disappointment, but his brain panicked more than ever. There was a slight miscalculation in the past he traveled back to.

Xeno said his consciousness would go back to the time when they were 20 years old at most, in late 2013 or 2014 at least. Stanley had already prepared himself to wake up to the sight of the old and stark barracks he was so familiar with. He had already thought of ten different ways he could escape and come back to their hometown in Houston to drag the young NASA scientist and demand that he make him a time machine. Wild? Yes, but it was highly possible with Xeno’s library of knowledge and solid financial and resource support from his workplace. Never in his imagination could he have thought that the scientist would find him instead, under the moonlight, lying pathetically and crying over the moon.

However, the Xeno he faced right now was a broke 18-year-old student finishing his PhD. In this period, Xeno Houston Wingfield hadn’t yet been formally accepted to NASA, and Stanley Snyder hadn’t yet been enlisted in the military.

Stanley thought deeply.

He accepted the situation. There was no use crying over the spilled beans. 20 years old or 18 years old, Xeno was still Xeno. He should be thankful enough that he wasn’t sent back to when they were children, still learning to walk or talk. He wouldn’t feel so against it, he thought seriously, for he could see little Xeno again.

Stanley’s mind was already spiraling on how to smuggle materials for the time machine and how to approach the situation appropriately when Xeno threw a pillow at his face.

“Are you seriously ignoring me right now, Stan?!”

Stanley looked at the bellowing scientist; he was already retreating to the door, marching with unnecessarily heavy steps. He could hear his grumpy complaints as he disappeared from his vision. It was a cute sight (for Stanley at least). Xeno shut the door with a loud ‘bang.’  And Stanley chuckled at that.

Once silence submerged the room, Stanley rubbed his temples. His head hurt so badly. Then, he settled his attention on the pillow Xeno threw at him. He realized it wasn’t exactly a pillow but a rocket plushie, the one his friend always kept close to him and hugged whenever he slept on the very bed he was on.

He placed the rocket upright on his chest and played with it like it was being launched into the sky. With his hands, the rocket slowly lifted. When it was at its highest point, however, the rocket toppled over due to some unknown malfunctions that Stanley momentarily decided. The rocket failed to launch fully and began crashing down on his face. He closed his eyes and pressed it softly to his lips, and raised it over his head.

He observed it and saw the faint red kiss mark that stained the rocket. It was faint, like a mere smudge. He hugged it tightly and closed his eyes again. His head still hurt, and he felt jetlagged. And so he slept.

___

It was raining blood. In the science facility. Along the hallways. Inside the laboratory. There was blood everywhere. It splattered all over his face. It stung his eyes. The river of blood began to flow and rise to his knees, taunting him to lose his balance. He persevered to anchor his feet on the floor. He stood still and put all his strength into his legs, hoping the rain of blood would soon stop and the river would then recede.

Despite his tired and aching leg, he refused to be down. Not when he saw the young intern, Chrome, and Senku get washed by the river of blood near his side. He tried to grab their unmoving bodies and get them to safety. He had two shoulders. He could carry the two scientists on them while he hooked his arm around the intern’s body. Stanley inhaled. He shook his head to get rid of the blood that blocked his sight. He was carrying three people, and his muscles tightened at their weight. Soon, his legs started trembling. He thought he was used to it, but the weight of three bodies—or lives—was heavy.

At the sight of another body, everything came crashing down. The body ended up floating in front of him. Xeno’s face was pale. His cold body hit his knees. The slight force made his strength falter. He wobbled as he tried to steady himself, and the three bodies he held fell back into the heavy pool of red. He panicked. The blood flowed harshly against him and washed them away from him. He looked back and tried to reach them, but they were already meters away from his sight. Then, he desperately pulled Xeno’s body up before he ended up in the same fate. But alas! His legs finally gave up. Both of them got swallowed into the river, and suddenly they were in the sea.

Stanley hugged the pliant body of his lover and called his name. He yelled into his ears to wake up and do whatever science stuff he had to do to get them out of their plight. Xeno didn’t respond. Stanley found it suffocating. The longer he kept holding on, the harder he found it to breathe.

The sea of blood roared with a huge upcoming wave. Stanley looked at it with an empty stare. He closed his eyes as he brought the Xeno’s body closer to him, as if he could spare him from that horror.

Then, a warm hand reached out to Stanley’s face. The hand tenderly caressed his cheek, and for some reason, brought a mysteriously dry towel closer to wipe his wet face and eyes. He forced his eyes open and saw Xeno smiling at him. “It’s okay,” Xeno repeated unremittingly into his ears. “No, it’s not,” Stanley thought. But he wanted to believe in Xeno’s words.

“I’m here, Stan. It’s okay,” Xeno reassured.

Stanley nodded. He clasped Xeno’s hand that was on his cheek and kissed it deeply as the massive wave came and swallowed them whole.

Then, Stanley woke up, one foot jolting up.

Disoriented, he rubbed his eyes a few times before looking around. It was still dark but not too dark. There was some blue light emitted somewhere. He looked at his side and found the computer screen looking busy as ever. It seemed to him that it was done loading the letters and numbers earlier, but new ones were being inputted as of the moment. Clacking his life away with quick keyboard smashes, Xeno stared at the screen with an impenetrable focus. Stanley stared at Xeno but didn’t call his attention. He shifted his body to a more comfortable position and used the click and clack sound of the keyboard as his white noise to sleep again.

It took him several minutes to feel drowsy, but when it came, it came heavily. He almost didn’t notice the dip in the area beside him on the bed. Stanley slept peacefully after that.

___

The next time Stanley woke up again, he realized it was already noon. His head and body ached from sleeping for too long. He groaned. After staring at the ceiling for who knew how long, he rose from bed and yawned for the sake of yawning. His gaze fell on the Xeno’s computer, and he felt great for it because it could now finally take a break. He patted the monitor and dashed toward the door.

His feet carried him to the living room. He could smell the aroma of a newly brewed coffee and a whiff of toasted bread and butter. His stomach grumbled. But instead of food, Stanley looked for something or someone else. Xeno’s parents were barely at home, so it was obvious it wasn’t them that he looked for. His eyes surveyed his surroundings, and true enough, he saw his childhood friend pacing back and forth in the kitchen, stuffing his cheeks with pieces of toast and downing them with coffee in a single gulp. After finishing his business, he passed in front of Stanley and grabbed his bag from a chair near him.

“Mornin’, ” Stanley called out.

Xeno didn’t turn his head to him, but he replied. “Good afternoon, Stan.”

“Going somewhere?”

“Hm. I have to go to the university’s lab. The professor just called me earlier and updated me on the project we’re working on. We’re finally seeing some elegant reaction after trying for so long, so I can’t miss this.” Xeno might look like a walking zombie, but his eyes dictated otherwise. They were full of vitality.

Stanley thought for a while. “Can I tell you something more interesting and elegant?”

Xeno faced him impatiently. “Can it wait?”

“No.”

“Make it quick, then.”

Stanley inhaled and then exhaled. “What if I told you I’m a time traveler?” he said. Xeno’s brows expressed their disappointment as they knitted disapprovingly. Before they complained more, Stanley added hurriedly, “I’m not lying. I can prove it.”

Xeno opened his mouth, then closed it again. After opening it once more to utter a syllable Stanley couldn’t make out, Xeno’s phone rang. “I’m sorry, Stan but I really have to go. Let’s talk about it later?”

And off he went. He darted swiftly to the front door, banging it loudly.

Stanley sighed. He settled himself in the kitchen, made himself some coffee, and lit a cigarette. He took a long drag and relaxed his mind from countless dizzying thoughts.

He spent that whole afternoon waiting for Xeno, concocting his plan on how to convince the young scientist to believe him.

Chapter Text

Stanley stood patiently, staring at the engravings of the wooden front door. At some point, he got tired of standing still and decided to place a chair a few feet from the door to sit down on. He smoked while he waited. He could feel it in his bones; every cigarette extinguished was equivalent to the time burned, wasted.

He had already done whatever he could. He brought himself to exercise, but the hard-drilled routine was too tough for his current body. A little more and his body would spasm uncontrollably. Not that he was surprised—he hadn’t yet experienced the hellish training in this timeline. Frustration bubbling up and leading him nowhere, he rested for a while, then took a quick shower.

Next, he decided to explore the Wingfield’s garage. Most of Xeno’s inventions were stored there, so he figured he could find something interesting. After minutes of rummaging about, he found several guns hidden not-so-covertly under a large, dark piece of cloth.

He grabbed a few that met his standard and cleaned them mechanically before trying them out. His shooting range consisted of the medium-sized garage and several empty glass bottles as targets. He realized then that while his mind clearly remembered the practiced skill, his body refused to keep up. He hit all the bottles, but not with the accuracy and efficiency he so wanted.

He heaved a dissatisfied sigh. He quietly considered the training he ought to do in keeping his mind and body in synch, lest he grow overly conscious and affect his self-esteem.

Stanley grew agitated at the silence gnawing at him. The sun had set for quite a while now. He stared at the door, and the door stared back at him. He propped his right leg over his left thigh, and then his left leg over his right thigh. He inhaled and exhaled. This cycle endured for what Stanley could only describe as painful.

After his seventh cigarette, heavy but steady footsteps could finally be heard from behind the door. The stick was put out on the ashtray lying near his foot on the floor.

The door swung open, and Xeno appeared in his sight. Stanley wondered why he was feeling so nervous. It wasn’t as if he would ask his best friend out (that would be in a few months from now, exactly a day before he left for the military). He remembered how Xeno almost threw him out of the window for asking him out when he had to leave so soon.

His best friend accepted to be his boyfriend, of course, but reminded him almost every day of how he had messed up, for when they would call, Xeno would always tantalize him with something he knew they both wanted, and it never failed in vexing Stanley that he couldn’t just drop everything down and rush over to his lover’s side.

Reflecting, Stanley thought it was stupid. He told Xeno his feelings because he thought it would benefit him. If he got rejected, he could simply move on and distract himself with the military. if his feelings were returned, Xeno would be his motivation to rise through the ranks to finally be worthy of him and assist him with whatever he needed or wanted. Never in his wildest imagination would his plan come back to bite him and make his suffering 10 times more agonizing.

“You’re trying to achieve what exactly?” Xeno’s voice called out from reality.

Stanley looked at the tired appearance of Xeno in the doorway. From the scientist’s perspective, he must have looked like a video game’s final boss sitting on his throne, waiting for the proud and gallant warrior to appear and take a chance on slaying him.

The moment Xeno entered, he instantly wanted to exit. Not because of the ominous final boss sitting opposite him, but rather, because of the toxic smell the said final boss produced. His face scrunched up in disgust, and he coughed a series of strained coughs whose only purpose was to guilt and reprimand the person in front of him. He pinched his nose with a pure sense of irritation.

“Just how much did you smoke?” Xeno asked. “Can you not feel your lungs dying?”

“Not really,” Stanley said flatly as he pretended not to hear the first question. “Welcome back. Anyways, let’s talk, Xeno.”

Xeno looked at him in disbelief. “Can I not enter my house and take a rest first? I’m honestly not feeling well right now, Stan.” Xeno took notice of the familiar shirt on Stanley’s body and frowned deeply. It clung a little bit too tightly to the part of his chest, and the rocket ship print on it looked like it was about to blow up. “Why are you even here? Don’t tell me you spent the whole day waiting for me?”

Stanley didn’t utter a word, but his brows answered the question.

Xeno’s shoulder slumped. Compared to the pair of galaxy eyes he showed this morning, his face displayed weariness and a barely concealed annoyance. Stanley’s heart felt heavy. He wanted to take Xeno to the shower and tuck him to bed. However, if he did, he knew he wouldn’t get another opportunity to convince him, and that was the least of what he wanted.

The best thing about going back in time was that one would have knowledge of the events. While he couldn’t remember everything vividly, he knew of one time when Xeno called him late at night. When he answered him, he heard nothing but Xeno’s breathing and occasional hm’s or ugh’s to his worried questionings. Stanley stayed on the line for another half an hour yapping about his day before ending the call after ensuring that the other man’s breathing had evened out.

He visited Xeno the following day to find out what that was about and found him holed up in his room, refusing to get out. The recluse wouldn’t talk to him at all, and the only way he could reach out to him was through the deep evening calls Xeno himself initiated, where the scientist would stay silent and listen to Stanley’s voice. ‘How annoying that was,’ Stanley thought to himself, but felt pleased over the fact that it was he alone who Xeno let take a peek inside his usually steeled heart.

Later, he came to know that the project he had been working hard on failed to give the results he desired. Usually, Xeno wouldn’t find that devastating, as he would discuss with him the elegance of trial and error. It just so happened that, at that time, the old professor he admired expected so much of him, and was more excited about his progress than Xeno ever was. The false alarm the professor gave this morning might have added to the disappointment Xeno had with the failure and with letting his favorite professor down.

Three days later, he recovered like nothing had happened and bounced back with a renewed strength, and Stanley thought everything was just a crazy fever dream.

Stanley was sure that if he didn’t stop Xeno from entering his room right now, his best friend might just turn himself into a spiritual hermit.

“You told me earlier that we’d talk,” Stanley began. He stood up, snatched his friend’s bag, and gently put it away in the corner. Then, he placed his hands over his shoulders and peeled the white coat off his body. Being careful of creasing it, Stanley hung it on the nearby coat rack. Following that, he looked at Xeno with a toothy grin. “So, let’s talk?” he continued.

Xeno gaped at Stanley’s actions. He shook his head and brought a hand to his forehead as he said, “Is this about you being a time traveler? Did you finally lose it after hitting your head last night? I have no time for jokes.”

The scientist received a deep frown in response. Stanley replied, “Neither do I. Let me have a say.”

Xeno sighed. “I can spare you a few minutes. But if at any point, I decide it’s absurd, I’m going to need you out of my house.”

“Yeah, sure, sure, go kick me out. But in return, listen to me and don’t interrupt,” Stanley voiced. He grabbed Xeno’s arm and brought him to sit on the chair facing the front door. Xeno complied. He leaned his back and heard a crack, but neither he nor Stanley commented on it. He let out a convenient ‘ahem’ and crossed his legs, putting his folded arms over his chest.

Xeno raised a brow. “So?”

Stanley positioned himself in front of him. He felt like presenting a topic in front of his teacher or a magician showing a trick in an audience; both were quite different, yes, but equally as nerve-wrecking. Hanging from the same coat rack as before, he produced a white cloth and shook it off before turning one side over for Xeno to see.

Xeno gasped. He squinted his eyes and scrutinized the cloth with diligence. “Is that… my parents’ blanket cover?”

Stanley cackled. “Yeah.”

“Stan!!”

“I couldn’t find anything to write on, okay? How did you even notice? Anyways, that’s not the point. I told you, don’t interrupt me. Look at this, here,” Stanley said as he spread his arms wider to reveal the writings on it, covering him with it.

Xeno forced the words of admonishment from coming out of his mouth as he glued his gaze on the blanket. His lips parted, and his pupils contracted. He almost stood up to study the whole thing, but before he could do so, Stanley folded the blanket in two.

Xeno’s face was red with irritation. “Stan, please don’t do this to me.”

“Wait, a moment, darling,” Stanley said absent-mindedly. Xeno jolted. Then, Stanley fished his phone out from the pocket of his jeans and checked something on it. “About time,” he said.

Xeno thought he must’ve heard wrong and leaned back in his chair. “What’s it?” he asked with concern.

As if someone other than Stanley heard him, a knock sounded from outside. Stanley half opened the door like he was the owner of the house. He started whispering with someone from the outside, and half a minute later, Xeno saw him give the person some money and offered some quick thanks.

“McDonalds’,” Stanley said. He lifted two bags he got from the deliveryman in front of Xeno’s face and handed them to him. “Burgers,” he mouthed with a smile that reached his eyes.

Xeno cautiously received it. One bag was hot and the other was cold. He put the cold one down on the floor and placed the hot bag on his lap. He looked at its contents. An awful number of burgers and fries revealed themselves to him. He took one burger from it and looked at Stanley, who was, for some reason, now inserting the corners of the blanket into the edges of the door so it stayed stuck on it.

“That’s not very elegant, is it?” Xeno commented as he gestured for Stanley to get the burger in his hand.

“Who cares?” Stanley said as he successfully plastered the cloth on the door. He grabbed the burger from Xeno’s hand, removed its wrapper, and put it in his mouth. Xeno pulled another cheeseburger from the bag and followed Stanley’s example.

After swallowing the food in his mouth, Xeno replied, “Oh, please. Of course I care.”

Stanley finished his meal in three massive bites. Xeno passed him his drink, and Stanley also downed that in a single gulp. “Okay, but going back, do I still have your attention, doc?”

“Not a doctor yet,” Xeno retorted while munching.

Stanley smiled. Whenever he raised an arm, he would see Xeno gawk at his abs, which peeked slightly behind the shirt he randomly grabbed from Xeno’s drawer, but of course, he wasn’t going to mention that. Right now, however, Xeno’s full attention was on the blanket. He stuffed his mouth with fries as he studied the things written on it, and Stanley struggled not to act upon the impulsive thought of pinching those adorable cheeks.  

“Yeah, whatever. So, whatcha think? Isn’t this enough proof I’m a time traveler?”

Xeno blinked slowly. “It’s terrible, Stan. I give you a C at most.”

‘Hey, that’s not a fail!’ Stanley thought, but was brought back almost immediately. “What do you mean?!”

Xeno stood up with his half-eaten burger in his hand. He placed the bag on the chair and slowly walked toward the blanket, his shoulders brushing Stanley’s as he did so. “This is supposed to be the schematics for a time machine, right?”

Stanley nodded.

"But from here--” Xeno said as he pointed at a lower left part of the blanket and traced through the lower right part. He continued, “--until here, are all incorrect.”

Stanley swallowed his saliva. He drew what he could remember from what Xeno showed him before he dived back in time. He didn’t have photographic memory but was pretty confident in his memorization skills. It wasn’t his fault (maybe it was) that his vision was so damn blurry with something hot when eyeing the schematics. His pride refused to reveal that information to the Xeno beside him, so he remained quiet and unmoving. However, Xeno must’ve seen his silence as him being unyielding because he wore an unsettled expression while he waited for Stanley to say a word.

“I get the theory, though,” Xeno expressed as he broke the silence. “Moreover, this time machine appears to be a device to transport tiny objects? Rather than people through the spacetime.”

“Messages, actually,” Stanley corrected.

Xeno shot him a dubious glance and began mumbling to himself while he looked at the diagram. He then finished his burger with small but quick bites, throwing the wrapper on the floor without care. He reached out for his bag that Stanley discarded on the side and took out a Sharpie from it. Still mumbling, Xeno started scribbling corrections and added his long-ass equations on the blanket.

Stanley knew the scientist had entered his own world, and nothing could now reach him. So, he sat on the chair and munched on the leftover fries Xeno couldn’t finish.

Persuading Xeno was pretty simple; he considered himself an expert in that regard. Flattery was no good. It would make you get under Xeno’s skin and cause him to spit sarcastic remarks so hurtful that you wish you had never been born. Threatening him was equally as bad, if not worse. He would simply turn the tables on you while genuinely praising you for even having the guts to threaten him in the first place.

On the contrary, riling him up was a good strategy. Stanley used the approach before when he wanted him to upgrade his rifle, and Xeno refused. After provoking him by saying he probably didn’t know how to do it, Xeno showed him the next day the most gorgeous gun he had ever seen. However, with Xeno’s current dampened mood, he eliminated it from his choice. Then, there was a method he rarely used but was highly effective—just begging. Well, that would definitely work, but rather not use it because it was reserved for other things.

Stanley put another fry in his mouth. The scientist was now kneeling with his face so near the floor. He filled the white cloth with nothing but an unstoppable force of science. The white blanket looked to him like a poor canvas vandalized with various graffiti and random scribbles. He chuckled at the sight of it.

There was a foolproof way Stanley devised to make Xeno do something he wanted. It consisted of three simple steps.

Firstly, feed his curiosity. Scientists are curious beings who thrive in their natural habitat, which is the unknown. The more mysterious the case was, the more Xeno would tend to try to understand it. Setting the trap and piquing Xeno’s interest wasn’t too difficult. He just had to present him with logical but vague information, and things would unfold naturally. Better so, tempt him by not revealing so much, so he would let himself fall into it like a moth drawn to the fire.

Secondly, feed his stomach, preferably with hamburgers. Nobody likes a hungry, grumpy scientist. Stanley could cook if he tried, but the fridge was empty, and he didn’t want to risk going out and disrupting the timeline, just in case. Fortunately, good old McDonald’s did its part and seemed to satisfy Xeno’s cravings, so Stanley was glad he thought of it. Once the scientist’s mood improved, he could almost win his mind over.

The first two steps were already done. And so far, things were tilting toward his advantage. To ensure his victory, he just had to do the last step, and he could call himself a winner.

“Xeno, are you convinced yet?” Stanley asked.

The busy scientist didn’t pay him any heed.

“Xeno.”

“Shut up, Stan. I’m trying to figure things out.”

Stanley rose from the chair with the bag of fries in his hand and crouched beside Xeno, who couldn’t be bothered to talk with him. He propped his chin on his hand and eyed the young scientist. “Need some help?” he asked.

“Not really. Just be quiet.”

Stanley rolled his eyes. He continued eating the fries, chewing them loudly. Xeno whipped his head in his direction, “I told you to be quie—” and a fry was put into his mouth. His brows scrunched, but he chewed it silently and continued scribbling.

“If you’re truly a time traveler, you must’ve used a different machine to come into this timeline, a machine that transports one’s consciousness to the past or future,” Xeno finally said.

“Yep, a huge one,” Stanley replied as he picked another fry to put in Xeno’s mouth.

Xeno accepted the fry. “So, does that mean you’re Stanley from the future?”

“That’s what I’ve been telling you since this morning, Man.”

Xeno looked at Stanley with curious eyes, spilling the stars with them as they scrutinized him. Stanley felt himself getting sucked into them. “Then, tell me, what year are you from, kind time traveler?” Xeno’s voice sounded half-serious and half-teasing.

Stanley's voice didn’t falter as he replied, “The Stanley you’re talking to right now is 31 years old.”

The scientist entered a deep state of thinking. “I could guess the time machine you used is a technology that is still beyond this era, no? There’s no way that it was created just several years from now. Did we perhaps manage to travel a thousand years later?” Xeno asked.

Stanley’s smile didn’t betray any emotions as Xeno observed him.

“Or maybe, a certain cutting-edge device was invented or discovered to make it possible. Am I correct?”

Stanley didn’t reply. His smile deepened, however.

Xeno huffed at the lack of response. He stared at the white blanket that looked almost black now. Stanley could almost hear the gears in Xeno’s head turn as he was lost in thought. He looked calm for someone who had just unlocked the greatest discovery of the century, almost as if he didn’t believe what was told to him.

Stanley knew skepticism filled Xeno’s mind, but asked anyway: “So, are you fully convinced now, Xeno?”

“No, I’m not,” he answered expectedly.

“What can I do for you to believe me?”

“Many things just don’t add up,” Xeno began. "How do I know you didn’t hit your head so hard you’re confabulating and seeing false memories?"

Stanley burst out laughing. “How could I have any memories of that thing?” Stanley pointed at the abused blanket. “Surely, you know how that’s beyond what I know, even for me.”

“Well, I admit, while the diagram was full of painful errors on your part, it still wonderfully depicted the theory and concepts that could just make time travel plausible. However…” Xeno felt the words stuck in his throat. “Please give me a moment, Stan.”

Stanley waited.

“When did you even come back in this timeline? This morning?” Xeno suddenly asked.

“Last night. I fell to my face after settling my consciousness in this body.”

Xeno looked at the bandaged forehead of Stanley. It didn’t look elegant compared to last night. He guessed Stanley did it by himself after he took a shower.

“How did the time travel affect your body?”

“Felt nauseous as hell,” Stanley replied. “After that, my body felt like it wasn’t mine. It was better this afternoon, though. My head still throbs, but it’s tolerable.”

“Who sent you here?”

“You, the future Xeno.”

Xeno’s eyes widened. Then, continued, “I doubt I’ll send you without any countermeasure. Did my future self say anything about that?”

Stanley thought for a bit. “He said he set a time limit of two months. After two months, I’ll be sent back to my timeline.”

“I see.”

 Stanley looked at the conflicted expression pasted on Xeno’s face. “Surely, you believe me now, stubborn brat?”

“What did you just call me, Stan?” Xeno asked, baffled. “You might be older now, but don’t forget we’ll always be the same age! I’m not even fully convinced yet!”

Stanley put the bag of fries on the floor. He drew closer to Xeno and whispered, “Yeah, and I’m about to make you now.”

“What?”

Stanley grabbed Xeno’s head and pulled it closer to his face. Xeno’s body went stiff as he shut his eyes tightly. He pushed Stanley’s chest with his hands, but his arms barely put any force, like they had just been put between them merely as a decoration. Stanley enclosed him against the door, the blanket offering his body any semblance of softness.

Xeno opened his eyes. His hazy gaze reflected Stanley’s face, which looked particularly heated yet calculating. “Xeno,” Stanley murmured. “Push me if you don’t like this.” Xeno’s arms that separated them tensed, yet they gradually began to fall to his side. However, Stanley caught and wrapped them around his shoulders. With silent understanding, Xeno put some weight on his arms, permitting the other to bend closer.

Stanley grinned. He could feel their breaths close to each other now. He loved how Xeno's hot and heavy breaths kept brushing onto his face. It tickled his nose and his ears, teasing him with the alluring sensation they didn’t know they brought. Stanley closed his eyes and slowly but surely pressed their lips together.

Lastly, feed his desire…

Chapter Text

Stanley’s lips left and met Xeno’s in a ragged interval. He reveled in the sounds he made the man produce, from the sticky whines, shy moans, and rough breaths. The man didn’t know how to reciprocate yet, but his reactions compensated for it. It was exciting. It was entertaining. It was lovable.

He supported Xeno’s head with one hand while the other began wandering beneath his shirt. The scientist squirmed at the sudden contact, a rough, hot feeling chaffing his almost pristine skin.

“Sta—Stan!”

He instinctively grabbed Stanley’s hand.

Stanley opened his eyes. Xeno’s haggard appearance made something inside him swell and ache. He paused for a while and took a deep breath. That was risky, he thought to himself.

He halted on feeling the man up and intertwined their fingers, then dove for another kiss. He deepened it, finding the right momentum again until Xeno forgot how to breathe. From Stanley’s estimate, the man’s brain short-circuited at least three times already, for he couldn’t muster enough strength to even speak or move anymore.

However, each time Stanley’s tongue tried to enter his mouth, Xeno clenched his teeth together, like it would kill him if something managed to intrude inside. With another failed attempt, Stanley let a low, irritated groan.

Immediately after, he caressed Xeno’s cheek. Once he got the other’s attention, he pleaded with his beautiful amber eyes.

Xeno’s body started up, and Stanley joyfully took that chance.

“Hmnn—” 

Stanley tasted Xeno with his tongue. It slid slyly through his mouth until it introduced itself with Xeno’s tongue. He felt proud of making the inexperienced scientist, at its touch, seem to melt with pleasure. His heart lifted with pride. Xeno’s heavy breaths were pained and ecstatic, a thing he found contradictory, but at the same time, perfectly sound in his ears.

Sweetness spread on Stanley’s tongue like honey. It slowly filled his whole mouth and was almost overflowing. It was pleasant—addicting, even. That was why it took him some time to register the rusty aftertaste of it in his buds.

Blood dropped from his mouth, the pain finally manifesting itself in a brilliant, delayed manner. He pulled himself from the biting scientist and brought a hand to cover his own mouth, his brows furrowing deeply.

“Damn it, Xeno.”

Xeno took slow but deep breaths, supporting his body against the door in a daze. Warm glaze settled on his eyes, while sweat covered his flushed face. He held his chest tightly. “You… you’re insane,” he whispered. Scarlet dripped from his lips, and some even splattered on his shirt.

Stanley sucked the blood on his tongue and panicked a little bit when he couldn’t stop the bleeding, it trickled on his chin. He stared at Xeno with complaint. “Well, always have been.” His words sounded unclear and dragged out with the sharp pain. He hissed as he continued, “Thanks for the compliment.”

Xeno awoke from his stupor and hastily pulled a handkerchief from his pocket. He grabbed Stanley’s chin and forced him to open his mouth. Shortly after, he firmly pressed the cloth down on his tongue. He applied pressure to it, just enough so his friend wouldn’t wince in pain. Stanley raised his face to make it easier for both of them and closed his eyes.

For a few minutes, nobody talked. Only their gradually settling breaths served them any signs of life. Neither of them would apologize, and they were both aware of it. After another full minute, Xeno lifted the handkerchief. Stanley rolled his eyes open and stared at Xeno inquisitively.

“The bleeding seemed to stop for now, but try not to move it too much. No tobacco for you until it fully heals—we can’t risk it getting an infection. Go rinse your mouth with saltwater,” Xeno said cooly as he folded the red-stained cloth.

Stanley’s eyes darkened at the sudden mention of ‘no tobacco.’ Still, he replied, “Awlright.”  Then, he asked, “Dew you believ me now?”

Xeno formed a fist with the handkerchief in his hand. He lowered his head and forced himself to stand up.

In order to convince the scientist, the last step involved feeding Xeno’s desires to erase his doubts. He knew about the so-called greed his man had and chose to use it against him. So, he opted to show him a demonstration, something that he, the future Stanley, could do, but the past Stanley couldn’t. He tested his physical abilities the whole afternoon to present Xeno exactly just that, but with his younger body failing him, he had no choice but to go for a different mode.

Stanley didn’t forget Xeno’s warning about not changing the events in the timeline too much. He remembered how Xeno mentioned ‘Be careful what you say.’ However, nothing was ever mentioned about his actions, right? Naturally, actions could reveal things like words, but unlike words, they were more flexible and vaguer. So, he knew that no matter what he did, so long as he acted as himself (within a reasonable extent), it wouldn’t change a damn thing about what he and Xeno had.

He might sound like a man with a convenient excuse to kiss his lover, but could he blame himself for being an opportunist?

If he could borrow the scientist’s logic, so long as he gravitated toward Xeno with open arms, Xeno would inevitably draw Stanley in like a magnet. Such was the law of attraction. Q.E.D.

After steadying himself up, Xeno replied, “Yes, I do. There’s no way the Stanley I know would have the experience you demonstrated. He fooled around a lot… but not in that way.” His voice was clear, but it couldn’t deceive Stanley’s ears, as it heard the shakiness it tried so hard to conceal.

Xeno quickly averted his gaze. Stanley finally realized something that had bothered him for quite a while now. His eyes settled on Xeno’s pants, particularly on the bulge they hid. Xeno saw him staring and turned his back on him, bolting straight toward the bathroom.

___

“I still have some questions,” Xeno said.

Stanley, who was sitting on the couch while playing with his phone, turned his head toward his best friend. Xeno just got out of the shower. He was wearing a dark purple silk pajama. He had a towel resting on his shoulder and was using it to dry his hair; without his usual hairstyle, it reached just to his shoulders. It made him look even younger and made the current frown he was wearing less intimidating.

“Hm?” Stanley expressed, amused.

“What do you want me to do?”

“Time machine,” Stanley said, and pointed a finger at him. He saved his words as much as he could, as his tongue reminded him to, painfully so.

“And if I refuse?”

“Please?” Stanley looked at him with those puppy eyes once more, trying something out.

Xeno felt a chill down his spine. His expression darkened. “Please, stop that,” he said, defeated.

Stanley laughed. “You’ll do it. Your brain’s too curious for it. I bet you’re itchin’ to build it right now.”

Xeno coughed a fake cough. “Fine, let’s say, I make it. What message will you send? Where and to whom will you send it?”

Stanley locked his eyes with Xeno. He didn’t avert his gaze while he thought of a proper reply. “Can’t say,” Stanley simply said as he made a gesture of zipping his mouth.

He braced himself for Xeno’s infuriated reaction. But different from his expectation, the scientist just nodded. “Fair enough. You can’t risk creating new branches if you want to go back to your timeline. How elegant, Stan.”

Stanley was taken aback. His chest tightened, but it felt nice.

“But,” Xeno continued. “I can draw several inferences. Firstly, considering the time limit provided by the future version of me and… all the things you did earlier to prove your point, I can say that the matter is important and urgent to you. Secondly, since you said it was the future me that sent you here, I’m almost sure it will also be me whom you intend to send the message. Oh, that means we will still be close to each other in the future? How fascinating. Thirdly—”

“Xeno, stop!” Stanley stood and firmly held Xeno’s shoulder, and shook him back and forth.

“What is it?”

“You think and talk too much. Not good.”

Xeno, seeming to realize it only now, smiled. “Oh, my apologies, Stan. Don’t worry, as long as you don’t deny or affirm anything, they’ll simply remain as guesses.”

Stanley shrugged.

“But can you answer just one question?”

“Depends.”

Xeno parted his lips. “Do you and I—” He forced himself to cut his own words. After a moment, he opened his mouth again, but words failed to escape it. Stanley raised his eyebrows. After a while, Xeno finally asked, “Do you want to make this successful?”

Question marks began to appear on Stanley’s face. “Duh,” he replied.

“Of course, you do!” Xeno exclaimed. Regaining his calm, he looked at Stanley with those familiar sparkling eyes. He said, “So, I want you to state how the time travel experience went as accurately as possible. Trust me, this is necessary to make the time machine. How fast did the whole thing feel like? What did you see while you were on the machine? How did it---”

And Stanley Snyder found himself answering Xeno’s never-ending questions the whole night, unable to retort that the questions thrown were clearly not just one.

___

The next morning, Stanley went home. He had to pack clothes and remind his mother that he would be staying over the Wingfield’s for a while. He could simply send her a message, but he was sure Xeno would hate to have all his clothes stretched out before he grew into them.

His house was walking distance from Xeno’s. It was also a lot smaller, but their yard was more spacious, with trees and various bushes surrounding it. By the time he reached it, he hopped over the fence and landed on the cobblestone pavement that led to the small patio near the main entrance. However, instead of following the path, he tiptoed his way around it and directed himself to the side door. He turned the knob with the slightest click he could make.

The door led him to the kitchen. He moved stealthily and pretended not to see the several stacks of dishes relaxing in the sink. He walked toward his room that was just upstairs, but before he could even get a glimpse of the stairway, a voice sounded:

“Is that you, Stanley?”

Stanley glanced up and saw his mother with a scrunched-up expression. She looked no different from the one in Stanley’s memories. She was a beautiful lady in her forties. Her features mirrored his own—a beautiful face with long eyelashes and short blonde hair. Her emerald eyes were also eye-catching on their own; they made her face softer compared to his.

“Yep,” he answered. “I thought you were still sleeping.”

Her mother scoffed. “It’s 8 am. It’s not early. You think you were being sneaky? Why are you talking like that?”

“Bit my tongue,” Stanley said as he put his tongue out.

“Ugh. How are you so careless?” She scratched her head then continued, “Were you at Xeno’s place, again?”

“Yeah. Actually, I’d be staying at his house for a while. I came back to get some clothes.”

“Eh, I see.”

There was a hint of silent understanding in his mother’s words. Stanley and his mother shared an okay-ish relationship. While he didn’t come out to his parents, her mother certainly knew. Sometimes, she pretended not to notice the lipstick he kept in his room, or when he would come home late wearing one (although he did wipe the lipstick off his lips this morning in case the old man was home). Every time he would mention Xeno’s name, she would scowl imperceptibly.

In short, Stanley’s mother wasn’t accepting of his identity but rather, just tolerating it. She hid her disdain through mocking smiles and a fake voice of concern. His old man, on the other hand, he didn’t have to think of; he was dead in his mind.

He averted his gaze from his mother before passing by her side and marching toward his room.

“Stanley,” she called.

Stanley stopped his steps.

“You only have a few months before the semester begins. You should start thinking about your career if you want to go to college.”

Right. There it was. The reason Stanley didn’t want to bump into anyone in his house was because of the issue. At this point, young Stanley had already steeled his resolve to enlist. Although he wasn’t doing it for them, it brought him great indignation about how his parents would react. His old man would be happy, and her mother would finally be relieved. Meanwhile, Xeno would be the only one who would truly feel anything for him. The only person who would be against it. The only one who would miss him.

“Yeah, I know,” Stanley replied.

___

The basement in Xeno’s house functioned as the young scientist’s lab. It was dimly lit inside when Stanley entered. The air smelled of various chemicals he couldn’t identify. He narrowed his eyes to the appliance Xeno showed him, and shifted his eyes to it and then to Xeno, and then to it, then to Xeno.

“What’s this?” Stanley said. He pointed to the appliance.

“Time machine,” Xeno deadpanned.

“Uh.”

“I’m serious, though.”

Xeno was still in his pajamas, but was wearing a lab coat to cover them. When he went out earlier, Xeno was still in bed. Stanley was just out for an hour, and now his best friend was spouting nonsense to him about their most serious project.

“But that’s a microwave,” Stanley said.

“Yes, Stan.”

“How’s that a time machine?”

“Microwave ovens generate high-frequency electromagnetic radiation. And most operate at a frequency of 2.45 GHz.”

“OK.”

“Microwaves are ideal for replicating certain quantum behaviors. The magnetron inside a microwave produces a concentrated EM field that can simulate the boundary conditions found near a rotating black hole, also known as a Kerr black hole.” Xeno rolled his eyes as if what he just said was simply common sense.

“Hm, I see,” Stanley said as he blinked slowly.

“According to the theory of the future version of me, cellphone emissions could amplify the waves, creating a sort of these mini black holes. We could make use of them as our pathway through the spacetime, warping them.”

“Ah, got it.”

“No, you don’t get it at all,” Xeno sighed. He rubbed his temples as he circled around the microwave.

Stanley watched him walk back and forth. He said, “So, basically, this microwave will be the main part of the time machine, yes? I doubt that’s gonna be all. What else do we need?”

“A stabilizer, a field stabilizer.”

“And that is?”

“The Large Hadron Collider.”

“…”

“LHC is the world's largest and highest-energy particle accelerator. It’s situated at CERN near Geneva, Switzerland… Actually, if we have it in our hands, I doubt we’ll even need the microwave.  We could just modify it and generate mini black holes through that thing.”

Stanley tilted his head slightly to his right and crossed his arms on his chest. He thought for a while. He considered smuggling illegal chemicals or even materials for the sake of this mission. Surely, it would have been easier if he or Xeno had the connections they would have in a few years to have access to what they needed, but they unfortunately didn’t have them right now, just yet. The Large Hadron Collider never really crossed his mind until now, but he was desperate to have it, even if he had to make everyone his enemy for this accelerator.

“Calm down, Stan. Your face…” Xeno looked at Stanley.

“My bad.”

Xeno sighed again. “Instead of thinking about it now, it’s easier to think of an alternative. For now, let’s begin adjusting the microwave so it connects to your smartphone. Give it to me,” Xeno said as he extended a palm to Stanley. “We’ll begin it today.”

Stanley handed his phone to Xeno. “Right.”

Stanley must admit—he did miss helping Xeno with his science projects. Xeno did everything that was technical, while he did everything that required manual labor. Just like in the past, the scientist instructed him on what to do, like which wire to cut or which one should be connected to which. Just like the good ol’ days, he found the process tedious yet enjoyable.

By the time the sun hid itself from anyone’s sight, the two had already moved to the kitchen to grab some food. They were too absorbed with the project that they forgot to eat, only drinking several cups of coffee to replenish their energy. It was only when Xeno’s stomach complained with a loud grumble like a loud animal did they realized that they still hadn’t had any meal the whole day.

After finishing their three-in-one breakfast, lunch, and dinner, Stanley grabbed a cigarette from somewhere. Seeing him, Xeno’s glare drilled holes in him.

“Gimme a break, Man. It’s been a whole day. I can’t take it.”

“Stan, did you forget about your tongue or what?”

“It’s fine.”

“You’re insufferable.”

“Sure am.”

Days passed identically like the previous ones. They worked with the time machine most of the time. However, when Xeno had some business to attend, Stanley would train his body. It became a routine for him to jog kilometers early in the morning, but aside from that, he would also work on some military drills and practice shooting when he could. In a way, they gave him a sense of purpose when things were progressing slowly.

Nightmares sometimes also plagued his sleep. The bad dreams would always be different, but they all ended with the conclusion: Xeno dying. At first, they would only be limited to the lab where he was shot to his end, but they soon transformed into scenes he hadn’t seen before.

One time, he dreamed of Xeno getting hit by a speeding car while he just stood still watching the whole thing happen. The next day, he witnessed his best friend’s body get crushed by falling beams from the construction site they passed by. Then, the day after that, Xeno met his demise by a knife, stabbed accidentally by a young and amateur robber who Stanley couldn’t even remember the face of.

Every single time, he would stand helpless, having no power to prevent the deaths. And every single time, Xeno’s last words to him would always be: “It’s going to be fine,” as if to comfort him. His warm hands wouldn’t fail to caress him while doing so. Just how pathetic did he look from his friend’s perspective that he needed to be comforted while he himself was dying? Stanley held his chest and inhaled deeply. He wiped the beads of sweat that formed on his temples and finally exhaled.

If alternate realities really did exist, like Xeno had surmised, would each of them end in Xeno dying? And would he always be useless? Stanley knew these nightmares were simply nonsense his mind had designed because of the circumstances, but he still couldn’t stop the anxiety from growing. And he became consciously aware of how pathetic he was from knowing it could grow to something he wouldn’t be able to control.

“Stan!” Xeno suddenly called. He just got home from his university, and his cheeks were still flushed from seeming to rush his way home.

“What’s up?”

“I finally realized what we need. It’s been two weeks, and oh, how blind we were! I had this annoying talk with someone on my program earlier. He kept on babbling about a TV series I honestly couldn’t care about.”

“Oh, yeah?” Stanley said. “How does that connect to whatever we need?”

“Well, he showed me a video he took from his phone of the scene he was talking about. I didn’t pay attention to it, of course, but I realized something.”

“Yeah?”

“I realized most households nowadays use LEDs instead of CRT displays.”

Stanley nodded. His house also had an LED television. “Okay?”

“Can you see, Stan? CRT displays use cathode ray tubes to project electrons onto a phosphor screen. They create a very specific kind of field—a constant, low-frequency, highly reactive to interference.”

Stanley’s pupils contracted.

“A field stabilizer!” they both chirped.

___

It took Stanley no more than five minutes to move the Wingfield’s CRT television from the living room to Xeno’s lab basement. Xeno’s parents were barely home, and Xeno lacked interest in media except news, so he doubted whether the TV led a fulfilling life at all. However, he felt relieved that he didn’t have to complete his secret plan to raid CERN for their LHC after all.

“You sure about sacrificing this thing?” Stanley said.

Xeno gave him a surprised look. “What do you mean, Stan? Being used to help scientific innovation is the greatest honor that could’ve happened to it. I’m sure our microwave and television are both pleased to sacrifice themselves in the name of science.”

“I dunno, Man. Last time I checked, appliances can’t consent. Also, replace the microwave and TV with humans, and I’m afraid you’d still be saying the same thing.”

Xeno laughed a forced laugh. “Well, that… I doubt that. Anyways, let’s start this, shall we? Lend me a hand, Stan?”

“ ‘Right.”

The two worked with their hands without stopping. Several more days passed when Xeno stopped giving Stanley instructions. He hummed in satisfaction as he held the phone in his hand. He looked at Stanley with a smile that looked both ominous and cheerful.

“Does that complete it?” Stanley asked. He gulped as he eyed their creation—the time machine that was said to be able to send a message into the future. It took them three weeks to make. And it definitely didn’t look the way he imagined it to be. It was a lot cruder than he expected, but he couldn’t complain.

“It would be great if it were. Science is full of trial and error. You know that,” Xeno said. He handed the phone that was connected to the microwave to Stanley. “That’s why we have to test it. Go write the message, I won’t look, I promise.”

Stanley nodded. He quickly typed some words, then erased them before typing again. After a moment, he expressed to Xeno that he was done.

“Can I be the one who inputs the date on the microwave on how many years forward it should be sent to?” Stanley said.

Xeno wore a neutral expression. “Sure,” he replied. “I’ll tell you how to do it.”

After following Xeno’s words, Stanley looked at the text he wrote. It was a message of a disaster that was to come, a clear warning in red lights. He looked at Xeno for confirmation.

Xeno nodded, and Stanley pressed ‘send.’

His heart raced uncontrollably in his chest. He felt heat on his hand as a loud sound boomed in his ears. Time seemed to move in slow motion as his thoughts wandered off to the ambush in the science facility. The sound of the explosions and the smell of something burning called out to him.

His body went stiff. He couldn’t move a muscle. He knew he had to move, yet his body refused to listen, as if he was super-glued to the cold tiled floor he was standing on. Past and future seemed to warp into a singular timeline. His mind went white blank.

Then, he felt someone push him.

Ah, a déjà vu.

Xeno threw his body at him and embraced him, pushing them to the side. They both rolled off to the corner. Xeno shielded their fall, and he bumped his head on the wall. He yelped in pain, and his hold tightened around Stanley’s body.

Stanley quickly sat up to check their surroundings. The time machine failed. It exploded into numerous pieces, with some still burning on the floor.

“Ah, it failed after all. Still, I didn’t expect that it would explode. That is unfortunate, but this is also part of the process,” Xeno said as he sat up.

“Part of the process—?” Stanley stammered to say.

Xeno wasn’t bleeding, but the accident earlier had probably injured his head (the bump wasn’t a light one). The scientist had a bright smile plastered on his face that Stanley found unbelievably annoying. He squeezed Xeno’s shoulders and pinned him against the wall.

“WHY DID YOU HAVE TO PUT YOURSELF IN DANGER?! YOU KNOW THAT I COULD HAVE JUST HANDLED THAT JUST FINE!”

“But Stan, you—”

“SHUT UP! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO RECKLESS?!”

Xeno went silent.

“You could’ve d—could’ve ended up in something worse… Honestly, you…” Stanley couldn’t remember the last time he raised his voice to Xeno. His own voice made him dizzy, and he hated every word he spat. He knew there was no point in yelling at his friend. He knew he couldn’t avoid the explosion in time if Xeno hadn’t intervened. He knew and yet…

“You’ll be the end of me,” he thought.

Xeno turned his head to the side, avoiding eye contact. “Let go, Stan, you’re hurting me.”

“My bad,” Stanley said as he let go. “I overreacted.”

“I don’t mind,” Xeno said. Something with his tone pierced Stanley’s heart.

After a while, Xeno stood up. “I’ll go get the fire extinguisher,” he said as he disappeared from Stanley’s sight, not even bothering to look back.

Stanley regretted his actions.

Chapter Text

Xeno considered Stanley one of the most elegant people he had ever met. He didn’t even have to say anything about his oh-so-perfect appearance, but his personality was quite pleasant as well, at least for him.

He had a stoic personality through and through. Practical and efficient. These all made him daunting to approach, but at the same time, it was through the cool and indifferent exterior and straightforward attitude that many felt the natural need to get close to him. Wherever he was, people would surely flock over. Xeno would express spite for these people only if he felt different. Unfortunately, a mysterious gravitational pull would always lead him to the man, and all of a sudden, the two of them were no more than a few inches apart.

Xeno would often wonder why this friend of his liked being around him. Stanley’s words toward him would always come off sarcastic and exasperated, like he was long tired of him. Yet, his assistance with his science projects would be offered before he could even ask for it; his short yet kind reassurances would never fail to make him feel better during the most unpleasant days; and his willingness to tether himself to him despite being painfully aware of his unlovable tendencies remained the only constant.

What a fascinating man his childhood friend was! He was on par with quantum mechanics. The more he tried to figure him out, the more mysterious and interesting he became. Xeno was a bit embarrassed to admit it, but even after many years of friendship, he was still trying to comprehend the singularity called Stanley Snyder. He couldn’t help but observe him as if he were some rare specimen, because, really, he couldn’t get enough of him.

So, obviously, Stanley never ceased to surprise him as well. For instance, he found it both hilarious and concerning how his best friend ended up tripping over nothing, and even more so, crying because, according to him, the moon was too far. It definitely wasn’t elegant, but it was an interesting sight to behold.

Later, he brought him home and tended to his wound as friends would normally do for each other. Aside from his bolder teasing, nothing seemed amiss. However, the man took him off guard with his inexplicable gaze. He felt him staring at his soul like he had seen everything that had to be seen of him. Beyond the layers of clothing he wore, he felt naked under the man’s scrutiny. It sent shivers down his whole being, and that terrified him terribly.

“Are you seriously ignoring me right now, Stan?!” He exclaimed. With feigned irritation, he backed away with cold sweat running down his neck.

Xeno wondered what that was.

After taking the time to calm his nerves down, he went back to check on his friend. He sighed in relief when he saw him sleeping. That was good. He didn’t want to bring anything up about what just happened. He simply concluded that, perhaps, too much caffeine in his body made him more restless than usual.

But then, he heard his own name.

“Are you awake, Stan?” he asked as he walked toward the side of the bed.

Stanley’s eyebrows were knitted tightly on his sweat-covered face. His lips trembled at the utterance of his name, and it caused a sharp jab to Xeno’s chest. The pain grew heavier on his lungs as it reached his stomach, making it churn.

Xeno thought it was wrong to see someone so strong, vulnerable in his presence. However, what he was feeling didn’t stem from disappointment or pity. It was something deeper, something more consuming he couldn’t name.

His friend’s pained expression magnetically brought Xeno’s hand to touch his face. He sat next to him and began caressing his cheek. Then, his other hand took a clean towel to wipe the sweat from his handsome face.

“It’s okay,” he found himself whispering to his ears.

“Xeno—”

“I’m here, Stan. It’s okay.”

He repeated his words like a mantra, like a prayer in someone’s ears.

Seeming to have his meaning across, Stanley’s breathing soon became slower and less difficult. He waited a moment before withdrawing his hand, but Stanley grabbed it and placed it close to his lips.

The cold and soft touch tickled his sensitive skin, and Xeno’s heart almost stopped beating for a few seconds. He peered at his friend. When he saw that he wasn’t awake, he sighed a breath of relief.

“I swear, surprise me one more time, and I’ll go into full cardiac arrest,” Xeno thought.

Promptly, Stanley jolted his feet and let a loud grunt.

Xeno stumbled on the floor. He crawled himself to the computer and seated himself in front of it. With practiced hands, he opened a window and began typing random calculations he could think of. He heard Stanley stir a few times but hoped the purposely loud typing sounds he made drowned the sound of his equally loud thumping heart.

After who knows how many hours of working, he yawned deeply and, with no other space to position himself, slept beside his best friend.

___

“So, are you fully convinced now, Xeno?” the ‘time traveler’ said as he faced him.

“No, I’m not,” he replied.

There were far too many loopholes in the information Stanley provided. His scientist brain was currently divided into two parts: one was passionate about learning whether the time machine could be built, and the other half was providing him with logical arguments on why time travel was impossible.

The gears kept turning.

He could feel his brain overworking the same way he could feel the unfamiliar sensation take control of his lips.

He was stunned, frozen. Was Stanley giving him mouth-to-mouth? Why? He looked at Stanley’s expression, akin to hunger. Then, he realized.

Stanley was kissing him.

How could something pleasurable be so painful? His head hurt from the lack of oxygen in his brain. He wondered how Stanley was fine. Then, he figured out he could breathe through his nose. He tried to follow the man’s lead and soon got it right.

However, the rough touch on his chest almost made his whole body jerk up. Soon after, his stomach collected unbearable weight and heat. He hadn’t yet adjusted his body to the sudden rise in his body’s temperature when Stanley started fighting with his tongue. He showed an interesting expression, one that Xeno hadn’t seen on the man's face before.

With that, how could he possibly resist? Stanley’s tongue wrapped around his own like his hands around his body.

Feeling his erection growing, he almost wanted to bury himself somewhere hidden. In panic, he caught the naughty tongue with his teeth and bit it as hard as he could. Their kiss broke, a thin crimson thread connecting their mouths.

Stanley’s blood tasted metallic, but it had a sweet aftertaste. It wasn’t so bad, he thought.

___

Xeno decided to trust the future Stanley in front of him for now, not because of ‘that’ incident, but because of the data presented to him. He wanted to get into the science of the time machine. His heart raced in excitement just at the thought of it. If he could get the honor of being bestowed the knowledge of the future version of himself, he had better not mess it up.

He looked at the time traveler. Future Stanley wasn’t that different from the Stanley he knew. But unlike him, this Stanley seemed a little bit too touchy. He never minded the other’s invasion of his personal space. They grew up together, so getting close to each other was nothing new.

To convince him, future Stanley proved his point by demonstrating an unfamiliar yet passionate kiss. It was only for that, nothing more, but something tingled him.

“But can you answer just one question?” Xeno asked.

“Depends.”

“Do you and I—” he paused. It was too early to assume anything, and misunderstandings could lead to nothing but a waste of time. It was illogical. He changed his question. “Do you want to make this successful?”

He hid the strange feeling on his chest just well enough so it could peek behind his heart.

____

“Shall I sleep on the couch?” Stanley asked.

Since they would be working on the microwave time machine, it would be convenient to have Stanley stay at his house for the whole course of building it. Familiarity aside, he was still a guest, so having him sleep on the couch didn’t sit well with him. They always shared a bed whenever he came over, so it wouldn’t be strange to do the same now, unless the time traveler wanted to sleep on his parents’ bed, which didn’t have a blanket cover for some specific reasons.

“My bed’s big enough for us,” he replied after careful consideration.

“Then,” Stanley hummed. “I’ll get the inside!” he said as he jumped on Xeno’s bed, occupying the part that was against the wall.

Xeno couldn’t believe his eyes. “What are you, a child? I doubt that you’re really 31 years old.”

He heard Stanley click his tongue. “Age doesn’t have anythin’ to do with it. I bet’cha want this side, too. Won’t let you have it, sorry,” Stanley said with a mocking grin.

“Whatever, Stan.” Xeno didn’t want to admit but Stanley was right. He grumbled his way into bed and lay beside his friend. “Good night, Stan.”

“Night, Xeno.”

After several minutes, Xeno was staring at the darkness.

1.2.3. He counted.

Something kept Xeno at the deepest of nights. It started him awake at midnight and caused him so much distress. Sometimes, he would wake from the nonstop turning movements on his side. Oftentimes, he would wake at the call of his own name.

Stanley’s panicked voice was always loud and scratchy in his ears. It was the type where one could hear the desperation behind it even without seeing its owner. Turning his head, he would see the miserable appearance of his best friend, his eyelashes quivering so slightly.

The strange thing about Stanley’s situation was that no matter how hard Xeno tried to get him out of the nightmares, he just wouldn’t wake up. He tried shaking him, screaming in his ears, and even slapping him across his face. However, they only seemed to make the dreams worse, so he stopped the futile efforts. Soon, he found that reassuring him with his words and calming him with his touch worked better.

The morning when they both would wake up, Stanley wouldn’t say anything about it, so Xeno wouldn’t bother to mention it either.  

One time, Xeno had been aroused by Stanley's thrashing his limbs around. The guy hit his neck, and Xeno took everything he had not to croak like a squished frog in the dead of night. He forced himself to sit up and turn his attention to his fear-stricken friend. Unlike usual, he called Xeno’s name not in agitation but in something else entirely.

“Xeno…”

Xeno’s brows contorted in displeasure, his lips pursed in a thin line. Stanley’s voice was quiet and low, a little bit raspy from smoking religiously, but the intensity it brought to him was heavier than any sound he had heard. It reverberated into his eardrums and lingered inside his ears far longer than necessary; it was an unpleasant feeling. Xeno propped his body with his arm and drew closer to his friend.

“I’m here,” he whispered. He brought a hand close to Stanley’s face and cupped his cheek like any other night. “I’m here, Stan.”

Stanley tried to lean his face closer to his palm as he held it with his own. “Don’t go,” Xeno heard Stanley say.

It was a plea.

Xeno let a low chuckle. He found himself laughing abnormally at the situation. He clenched his teeth not to let a sound out, but he could hear the inward laughs himself. He wasn’t so aware of which they were directed at, but his heart beat relentlessly among them. He didn’t know if his chest tightened with either worry or fascination. All he knew was that he had Stanley within his grasp, at his mercy.

He looked at Stanley’s face once more. His long lashes brushed his palm, and he could feel them tremble. He lifted his other hand and positioned Stanley’s arm beneath his head. He lay down facing Stanley as he used the man’s arm as a pillow. He stared at him intently with his pitch-black pupils, seeming to take everything he could discern from his friend in the dark.

“What happened to you, Stan?”

“What happened to ‘me’?”

Xeno continued caressing his friend’s face until he calmed down. At the sound of the other’s heartbeat relaxing, he raised his own arm from Stanley’s cheek and threw it around his shoulder. He embraced Stanley and buried his face in the crook of his neck. Taking his scent, Xeno found it comfortable, almost too comfortable for his liking, that he felt guilty over it.

“What is the future me to you?”

____

Xeno finally figured out the last thing they need to complete their time machine. It took him one annoying person talking about a TV series he had no interest in, but he finally realized that they needed a CRT television to act as the machine’s field stabilizer. Running along the sidewalk, he visualized the project mentally as he rushed home to deliver the news to the time traveler at his home.

During the days they worked on the project, Xeno noticed another thing aside from the nightmares that bothered him. Future Stanley was a heavy smoker—a walking smoke machine. Xeno found it difficult to digest how Stanley, who had a certified sweet tooth, could handle the bitter taste of nicotine.

Stanley picked up the habit of smoking after trying his dad’s cigarettes one time. Much to his aversion to them, Xeno couldn’t stop his childhood friend from falling completely into the vice. Stanley managed to keep it a secret at first, but when Xeno started catching a whiff of the tobacco from Stanley’s clothes, it was already too late. The man was already addicted beyond salvation.

“Please refrain from releasing toxic fumes when we’re working.”

Stanley raised a brow. “Shouldn’t it be fine? We’re only waitin’ for the calculations to load anyway,” the man said after releasing those annoying toxic fumes.

Xeno glared at him. “Stan.” He was far too irritated to have his warnings on smoking fall into deaf ears like usual.

“Woah,” Stanley said. He took one last drag before putting the stick out with his shoe. “There,” he expressed as he raised both his hands in the air.

“Well, isn’t that better, Stan?” Xeno nodded in satisfaction. “Now the air’s more bearable to breathe.”

“It’s less bearable for me.”

“Nonsense,” Xeno huffed. He folded his arms to his chest and leaned against the table. “It worries me--” he lowered his head and stared at the floor. Then, after a while, he raised it again and looked directly at his childhood friend. “--to know that you’re still smoking even after 13 years…”

Stanley let a small ‘hmn.’ He closed their distance and assured, “Don’t worry. I’d be fine.”

“Would you be really?”

Stanley nodded.

“Liar,” Xeno thought, but chose not to express. Instead, he heaved a heavy sigh and said, “Of course.”

The computer near the microwave produced a beeping sound indicating that the calculations were finished. Xeno confirmed the news with Stanley and handed him the phone. After typing his message, he helped the man input the number of years he intended to send the message to.

Stanley looked at him with inquiring eyes. Xeno’s heart was beating loudly. If the message was sent, he wondered if the Stanley in front of him would return to the past. Perhaps that was the best-case scenario.  He thought of the time paradox surrounding the whole ordeal. He worried for his best friend and wouldn’t wish for his distraught. So, to have the project end in success was all they could both wish for. Yet, there was a great disturbance in his chest. It was a mixture of excitement and dread, stirred marvelously by an iron stick of anxiety.

Still, he steadied his breath. He looked at Stanley and nodded. Immediately after, Stanley pressed the send icon on his phone.

All they had to do now was to wait.

Light was faster than sound, but Xeno heard it first before he saw it. At the sound of the explosion, he got his feet off the ground and into the air.

He was just a few inches away from Stanley. He focused all his body weight on the stunned man as he jumped at him.

The whole thing was just a split second, but he had thought of several things mid-air. He thought of the failed time machine, the troublesome mess they had to clean afterward, and the reason for the so terrified expression Stanley was wearing while he threw himself at him.

The two were hurled to the side, barely avoiding the explosion, and rolled a few times before Xeno hit his head against the wall. He felt his skull ring, but was more concerned about the time machine. It was unsurprising to fail at first, so he wasn’t hurt about it (his head hurt far more). Instead, he unexpectedly felt at ease. He looked at Stanley with the same face that reflected that feeling. Stanley, however, didn’t feel the same way.

“SHUT UP! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO RECKLESS?!”

The pain in his head soon made itself more known to him as Stanley pinned him against the wall. Xeno could feel his blood boiling and evaporating into anger. His face flushed red, wanting to sound out how wronged he felt. He even blew hot air out and glared at his friend. The moment his gaze touched Stanley’s face, however, he was rendered silent.

All the pain and anger he felt in his head seemed incomparable compared to the person facing him.

“You could’ve d—could’ve ended up in something worse… Honestly, you…”

It pricked Xeno’s heart with tiny, little stabs to be treated as if he were some fragile being that could break at any moment. He wanted to say to Stanley that he was the one who seemed to break at any moment right now. Consequently, it caused him confusion to feel as if he were someone held dearly to someone’s heart, but at the same time, to be looked at as if he were someone else entirely—it hurt.

Returning the drowning gaze of those misty amber eyes made him feel sick. “Let go, Stan, you’re hurting me.”

“My bad,” Stanley said as he let go. “I overreacted.”

“I don’t mind,” he replied. His voice came colder than he intended it to be. And guilt soon overtook him.

Xeno looked at Stanley when he didn’t hear him reply. The man had his head down. He couldn’t see his expression. Meanwhile, his hands were thrown to the floor, which made Xeno want to hold them; the tiled floor was cold, after all. However, he stopped himself from the urge.

 “I’ll go get the fire extinguisher,” he said after a while. He just remembered the time machine the moment he spoke those words, but since it passed his thoughts, he reckoned it would be wonderful to get into it.

___

Xeno clinically cleaned the mess in the lab, took a quick shower, and applied a cold compress to the swelling that formed on his head. He did all those without batting an eye at Stanley, who placed himself lying languidly on the coach, puffing smoke like there was no tomorrow. Even as they ate their dinner, only the munching and the clacking sounds of utensils against their plates accompanied the awful scene.

The silent concerto halted when Stanley stood and went out for another smoke. Xeno grimaced as he forced himself to finish his meal.

He intended to avoid Stanley for as long as he could.

But…

But when the two of them practically lived together, his probability of success was closer to zero. Never mind bumping into each other in the rooms, they literally slept next to each other.  

So, that night, Xeno couldn’t sleep. Oddly or not oddly enough, it wasn’t because of the usual reason. He had his eyes open dryly at the sight of air in the darkness. He sighed twice; first, at the weight of the bags under his eyes; and second, at the weight of the gaze that gave appraise.

Under the blanket they shared, he refused to face him. But even with his back turned, he could still feel the drilling stare directed at him.

“You’re still upset,” Stanley suddenly said.

Xeno almost turned around. “No, I was never upset, Stan.”

“Sure. Then, why’re you turnin’ your back on me?”

“Because I just felt like it. Who cares which direction I face when sleeping?”

“You usually like sleeping facing this side, though.”

Xeno paused all his thoughts for a bit and slowly turned around. “What do you mean?” he asked, facing Stanley now. “Was he awake all this time, after all?”

Stanley let a small “Oh,” and pursed his lips. Xeno raised a brow at him and waited for an answer, sweat forming on his palms. “Sometimes, I would wake up in the middle of the night and see you sleeping,” he then said monotonously.

“You’re lying,” Xeno said with utmost confidence. “But you’re right that I prefer facing this side. How did you know?”

“Guessed it.”

“Your intuition is amazing as always,” Xeno replied with an unamused tone, facing his back to Stanley once more.

“Hey—” The blond hurriedly grabbed Xeno’s jaw with his hand, squishing his cheeks with it. He forced him to turn to his direction, and unsurprisingly, Xeno struggled to fight his friend off with little to no effect. “Don’t turn your back on me,” Stanley said.

“Stan! What are you doing?!” Xeno pushed Stanley with his right hand, and his left struggled to remove the other’s hand from his face.

“Don’t turn your back on me,” Stanley repeated.

“…” Xeno stopped moving. After a short while, he said, “Remove your hand from my face, and I’ll consider it.”

Stanley hesitantly slid his hand down Xeno’s face, falling on his neck. Its slight touch lingered there for a bit without putting any of its weight, until it finally retracted itself in a slow, dragged-out manner. “M’kay,” he said.

Xeno felt his neck itch a little, but he thought he only imagined it. Still, he couldn’t help but run his own fingers over it and rub it slightly. The imagined itchiness dissipated, but it was replaced with a burning sensation. He cleared his throat a few times in hopes it would disappear.

“You good?”

Xeno looked at his friend in the dark. He could make out his worried face. “I’m fine,” he replied. He lay on his back and went back to staring at the dry air in the darkness. “There, I’m no longer turning my back on you. Satisfied?”

Stanley scoffed. “Well, I guess it’s better than before. Now, go sleep.”

“Can’t.”

“Why?”

“The time machine failed, and I’m thinking of the possible reasons for it. It took approximately 2 seconds and 14 milliseconds of coherent noise before the explosion occurred. Meaning, the problem doesn’t lie in calculations. The field just collapsed too early.”

“So, the TV that won’t work after all?”

“No, it should,” Xeno said as he placed a hand on his forehead. “We’ve got to think it over. Something must’ve slipped past us, something small…” He massaged his temples, his veins throbbing.

“Don’t think about it right now. There’s still time. You need sleep, I need sleep.” Stanley said in a low voice.

Xeno closed his eyes. “Doesn’t it frustrate you, though?”

“Not reall—well, a bit, I guess?”

Silence, then Xeno replied, “I don’t believe you, Stan. This frustrates you quite a lot.”

“What makes you say so?”

Xeno turned his head to face his friend beside him. He gave him a wry smile. Repeating Stanley’s words earlier, he said, “Sometimes, I would wake up in the middle of the night and see you sleeping.”

He heard the man release a sharp exhale that disturbed even the atmosphere. His amber eyes seemed to glow in the dark, and even felt like the light in them could penetrate through one’s bones. It elicited danger that could make one feel like a deer in the headlights. Xeno gulped down his own saliva, making his mouth dry. He added, “I won’t ask questions.”

The blond seemed to ease a bit, but his chuckle came out a bit forced. “You can, though.”

“Will you provide me the answers I seek?”

Stanley nodded, his glowing eyes fixed on him. “If it’s ‘you,’ it’s fine.”

“Then, I won’t ask,” Xeno whispered.

Stanley didn’t reply. But now, it was his turn to turn his back on Xeno. He shifted his position and faced the wall as silently as he could. Xeno stared at his friend’s broad shoulders and blinked a few times. He hesitated but gradually managed to draw a hand to run across them. He did the action for a long time before finally bringing himself closer and leaning his forehead against Stanley’s back.

He embraced Stanley, and Stanley let himself be embraced by him.

Xeno’s arms wrapped around Stanley’s waist as if he were his rocket plushie, albeit larger and stiffer. They stayed like that for as long as they could remember and eventually dozed off.

Stanley's nightmares didn’t visit him that night, and Xeno’s sleep continued uninterrupted.

Chapter Text

The air in the lab basement reeked of bitter coffee and burnt solder.  A huge whiteboard stood on the side, displaying numerous crossed-out diagrams—a huge contrast to the proud formulas several weeks ago.

Xeno hunched over the microwave and uttered muffled words underneath the palm that held his own mouth. His eyes swiftly darted between the ‘time machine’ and the whiteboard, making the thick bags under them appear spasming on their own.

Near him, Stanley burned his nth cigarette. After finishing the final stick, he quickly leaned against the wall and folded his arms like they were some weights on his body. He did so firmly that it seemed as if he didn’t, he’d end up pacing back and forth like ocean waves during a storm.

“You changed the modulator,” Stanley finally said after an unimaginable amount of silence.

“Yes,” Xeno replied steadily.

“And it didn’t work.”

“--again,” Xeno added.

The blond scratched his head and laughed. “I see. That’s too bad.”

Xeno brushed the surface of the microwave with his fingers and turned his body to his friend, making his white coat swirl dramatically behind him.

“Don’t make that face,” Stanley said. He inched closer and placed a thumb between the scientist’s brows. “Makes you look like an angry chihuahua.”

Xeno slapped Stanley’s hand away and scoffed. “Shut up, Stan.”

His gaze shifted to the floor. Xeno didn’t know when days started to blur into weeks, and it had already been a month since their first attempt at the time machine. Since then, they had started working from scratch, replacing the parts of the microwave they used with new ones, modifying the tiniest inconsistencies in the diagram, and triple-checking the calculations Xeno knew were flawless.

However, the only result they would get to see was the little to no reaction of the microwave heating up, barely comparable to their first attempt when they were so close, if only it hadn’t exploded.

Xeno looked at Stanley once more. He smiled wryly. “I must look pathetic?”

“No.” Stanley struggled to find the next words. Xeno saw how his Adam’s apple bobbed without any sound coming out. “There’s still time…”

Xeno shook his head. They had wasted a whole month. No matter where one looked at it, that was an utter debacle on his part. A week ago, he had finally landed an internship at NASA—a dream he had yearned for years, finally unfolding in front of his eyes. Yet, instead of celebrating, he felt the need to force himself not to throw tables around for each failure they experienced with the project.

He felt unhappy at the fact that he couldn’t help but feel unhappy.

He hadn’t told Stanley about the news directly, but he reckoned that the man must’ve known about it already. That filled him with a bit of unease. With every movement he decided to make, it seemed to him that Stanley would already know how to adjust himself to complement them. And with every word he decided to spout, it seemed to him that Stanley would already know how to respond to them. That, in itself, was normal. The man was from the future, after all.

However, each time Stanley would look at him with those eyes that begged not to tear his gaze on them, doubts would begin to rise at an alarming rate.

Aside from their first failed attempt at the time machine, that particular day marked a certain change in their relationship. Xeno wasn’t conscious of it at first, but he gradually came to realize that best friends probably don’t cuddle each other to sleep every night. At first, he justified that he was only helping Stanley with his night problems. Stanley wouldn’t be visited by his recurring nightmares so long as they stayed in that position.

But as weeks continued to pass uneventfully, he noticed how his friend’s touch seemed to grow hotter each night. No-- perhaps his touch had always been that hot, but his skin only welcomed their heat just now. And it reached the point where pretending not to notice it would only brand him as blind.

To make the matter worse, Xeno seemed not to hate the feeling. Instead, he longed to be burned by it if possible.

He convinced himself that this future version of Stanley landed in front of him by a mere chance. He didn’t know whether he should consider himself to be lucky for that, since there was no guarantee that this Stanley was ‘his’ Stanley. Every huge decision splits reality. He couldn’t be too sure whether the current reality they were experiencing had already branched off to a different one. All he could do for now was to follow the time traveler’s request to make the time machine and wait until he received his message (he had guessed the message was directed to him) to find out. If he could successfully build it, that is.

“You’ve been here for too long,” Xeno said absent-mindedly.

“Still have a week.”

“Only a week.”

Stanley smirked. “Gonna miss me?”

Xeno raised a brow and showed a gentle smile, surprising even himself. “Perhaps, I will. You’re less agreeable than my Stan because of how much you smoke, but I must admit you’re stronger and more efficient with manual labor compared to him.”

“Your Stan?” Stanley asked, ignoring how Xeno had just explained how he saw him as his free manual laborer. His brows wrinkled as he said, “Aren’t I him? Just older.”

“Not really.”

“How so?” Stanley’s voice was serious.

“You said it yourself before.”

Stanley waited for his explanation.

“According to what you explained before, you ‘time leapt.’ You had your consciousness travel back in time. You slipped between timelines, between probabilities. Don’t you understand? You didn't choose me, Stan. You landed in this world out of convenience. Entropy rolled its dice and handed you this version without asking if you like it.” Xeno’s heart raced quickly, the same way his mouth ran itself off without pausing. He felt the air becoming denser, but he couldn’t stop himself from talking as if something inside him broke and spilled its contents. “I always wondered why out of all the timelines you could transport yourself into, why is it that you chose the time when we were 18. Then, when I received that Email from NASA, everything made sense.”

Stanley frowned. He took a step back and observed his friend’s expression. Shortly after, his expression changed to a neutral one, and then he opened his mouth. “What did you find out? Tell me. I won’t deny nor affirm it as per our previous discussion.”

“I could deduce three things,” Xeno said as he raised three fingers. “Firstly, you didn’t intend to slide into this timeline. It would be far better for you to go when I was already a scientist at NASA to get all the resources and connections you would need for the time machine. Which brings me to my second conjecture: the time machine you used to get here wasn’t exactly completed, so you veered slightly off course. That’s how you ended up here--with ‘me,’ not the version you were expecting. That, or the calculations were inaccurate. But I trust the future version of myself, so I believe it was more of the former.”

Stanley’s face didn’t betray any emotions. He stood there still like a statue, his hands on his sides. “What’s the third one?”

Xeno thought for a while. Then he said, “I don’t have a solid basis for the third one yet, so I won’t tell you about it.”

“Don’t gimme that shit. Spill it. I told you, I’m not gonna reply or react to it.”

Xeno sighed. “Fine,” he said. “….Lastly, you’re most likely projecting your emotions to another version of me onto this one,” he said as he spread his arms widely.

Xeno saw Stanley’s eyes widen in shock and tasted the bitter taste of disappointment. “I see I hit the mark?”

Stanley closed his eyes and began rummaging in his pants for some poison sticks. Xeno recognized this habit whenever his friend felt disturbed. Unable to fish anything out, Stanley sighed—almost a groan—to stir the pressure that settled in the air.

“No comment,” Stanley said. 

Xeno’s chest tightened. He expected the reply miles away. Stanley was a loyal man and would always be. That wouldn’t change even if he were from a different timeline; he knew he wouldn’t break his word. He should feel relieved because the man kept his promise. However, he still held onto the hope that he would deny it.

“But,” Stanley said. Xeno lowered his arms and listened. “Whatever I feel right now, know that they’ll never change.”

Xeno felt his eyes twitch. “Right now? Even this ‘now’ isn’t constant. The feelings you harbor right now don’t necessarily have to apply to this world. They’re merely reflections of a probability made possible due to the countless branching of universes.”

Stanley let a cold snort, looking offended. “Well, doctor, with all due respect, how dare you. You don’t actually believe that, do you?”

Xeno didn’t deny the title. He was already a doctor at this point. “Oh, yes, I do. The Everett interpretation—”

“Shut up. That’s not what I mean.” Stanley’s words were sharp, just like his gaze on him. Xeno wondered if the lack of cigarettes in his mouth made him more irritable than usual. “I mean—” Stanley scratched his head, then continued, “How ‘bout you? What do you feel right now? How are they different from before ‘the me right now’ came crashing down into your life?”

Stanley’s words made Xeno pause for a bit. “I don’t understand how any of that is relevant,” he replied.

“I’ll answer for you-- they didn’t change one bit.”

“…”

“Unlike you, I don’t need any scientific basis--those are always beyond me. I simply follow my intuition. It hadn’t failed me once before, so I doubt it’ll fail me in any of the parallel universes you speak of.”

“That’s illogical, Stan. It still doesn’t prove anything.” Xeno had his head lowered. He clenched his hands into fists as he felt Stanley’s hands clutch his wrists.

“Yeah, it does,” Stanley said matter-of-factly. “My intuition always screams at me to go to you… to be with you.”

Xeno locked eyes with Stanley. As he had thought, he was already looking at him with those eyes he couldn’t bear to look at, but at the same time, couldn’t stomach to ignore.

The abyss met the light of the scorching sun. Instead of the abyss enveloping the sun, the two, with a mysterious force of magnetism, absorbed each other and became a phenomenon called the midnight sun.

“That--”

Xeno let Stanley pry his clenched fists with his fingers, coaxing them to let them in. Once opened, he placed his palms on Xeno’s own before intertwining their long fingers together.

“I’ll always be drawn to you,” Stanley said softly.

Xeno’s heart almost jumped out. He also felt the same, but his reply came out indifferent. “No,” he returned.

“Bet.”

Xeno chuckled for a short while. He relaxed his expression and returned to his usual poker face. He tilted his head slightly to his side and said, “But Stan…”

Stanley mirrored his action and tilted his head too. “Hm?”

“You might not be mine.”

Stanley’s hands squeezed him tightly. He gulped and asked, “Don’t you trust me?”

“I do,” Xeno said without hesitation. “But this is different.”

“No, it’s not.”

Xeno’s face reddened in disbelief. “Are you even listening to me? The version of me—”

Without any warning, Stanley pulled Xeno’s hand to him, and their heads almost hit each other. Stanley pressed their foreheads against each other and peered down at Xeno’s pitch-black eyes intensely.

In a low voice, he declared, “My soul will follow you even to the depths of hell.”

Xeno pursed his lips tightly and forced himself not to smirk. He shivered in excitement as his worries temporarily dissipated into thin air. He cared not for them at the moment, and focused solely upon the face of the man whose lips had just uttered something that sounded more of a threat than a confession.

“Can you even do that?”

“I can.”

___

Xeno hadn’t thought about how silence could be so deafening until now. He could block any noise whenever he was working in the lab, so he didn’t pay much attention to his surroundings when he was inside it. In most cases, the low but consistent hums of the machines made him feel at ease, helping him keep track of time. Right now, though, he wished they would buzz louder, so he could turn his attention to them instead of focusing all his brain power on forcing the zapping sensation down his spine.

Stanley hadn’t said a word since the declaration he made, just a silent display of devotion with his calloused hands. Both of them were down on the floor. Xeno had his knees bent, pants half undone. His thighs could feel the fabric of the white coat he refused to peel off his body, while Stanley sat across from him, leaning against the cold, hard wall. He brought an arm to press one of Xeno’s thighs down and another to touch his nape.

Xeno didn’t flinch or pull away. Then, they shared a quick kiss—as if testing the waters—before going for another one. And another. And another.

At one point, their teeth clashed against each other, but their momentum didn’t deter as they both closed their eyes in synch and repositioned their heads to dive for a deep, longer, hungrier kiss.

Stanley’s hand on the back of his neck slowly slid around his waist and pulled him closer. He unbuttoned Xeno’s shirt and stopped at his necktie. Hands on bare skin, it was exactly how Xeno thought it would be. He could get used to getting burned if it always felt like this, he thought.

Xeno’s breathing became irregular and gradually heavier. He had already gotten the hang of someone intruding on the inside of his mouth, and his fast-learner self soon grasped the skill of returning it. He caressed the back of the blond’s head gently, while his tongue traced along the other’s upper teeth before meeting his tongue midway. He relished in delight a little bit when he felt the uneven texture on Stanley’s tongue, and took pride in being the one able to leave that hidden scar.

Feeling the heat inside his stomach grow, Xeno climbed onto Stanley’s lap and pressed their bodies together, his hands wandering on the other’s bulging pants. Stanley didn’t let the scientist waste his precious energy and gently swat his hand away to unbuckle his own belt and finally reveal his proud, erect cock.

“What now, Doctor?” Stanley asked with a dark smile plastered on his face.

Xeno stopped moving and then adjusted his position. He gulped and pretended not to lose his cool upon the marvelous (and elegant) sight, but the sweat that quickly formed on his temples despite the low temperature of the lab relayed otherwise. He steadied himself as he took a quick, sharp exhale and put on an act that the great shudder he just felt came from the dry air they both shared.

He slid his underwear down, his rock-hard freed from the thin, restrictive fabric. Once their hips aligned, he tilted his chin up. “Aren’t you the expert?” he asked, provoking.

“Hah.” Stanley sounded amused. “Of course, Darling”

“Hurry up,” Xeno said sharply. He could feel his painful erection, and his voice came out more authoritative and demanding than desperate and needy.

Stanley automatically stiffened. “Roger that,” he replied.

Xeno’s cock twitched under the touch of Stanley’s rough palms. Their cocks touched briefly. Then, one second, they ground roughly against each other. Heat soon started building up as they both gasped breathlessly at each other’s faces.

It was unbelievable how Xeno didn’t recognize his own voice. It felt unfamiliar, like a distant ringing on the other side of the room when Stanley’s fingers slid so smoothly.  His hands felt good—too good, his head spun. He yanked Stanley’s shirt and held onto it desperately. His nails dug into the other’s back as he rocked harder on top of him.

He hated how his body shook uncontrollably. He hated how Stanley could look so used to what they were doing. And he hated how, despite all that, his body still craved the need for his messy touch.

Their cocks slid together, trapped between their stomachs. Aching and leaking, the friction elicited electrifying flares inside his stomach. His grip tightened around Stanley’s shoulder.

Stanley paused for a moment. He caught Xeno’s hand over his shoulder and brought it in front of them. He drew the other’s hand to their pulsing shafts that were begging for release.

Xeno tried moving them together, starting slow and unprecise. Stanley’s body arched up, and he met Xeno’s ears. He whispered, “That’s right, Xeno.” He brought his fingers to guide the young doctor and swiped his thumb along his tip.

The pressure was dizzying, almost unbearable.

“Yes. Shit… yes, just like that,” Stanley hissed. “Now, more.”

Stanley’s voice was deep and ragged. It confused his brain but filled his heart with pure ecstasy. Knowing he made Stanley hard stroked his ego more than it should, giving him confidence to roughen each thrust along with his unreserved gasps.

While he did so, Stanley moved, slick with sweat, to keep filling him with heated kisses, trailing along his chest.  Xeno became slightly conscious of how red lipstick stains must’ve blotched his pale skin. These stains left an indescribable feeling that heat bubbled up inside him and dried his throat and lungs. He moaned loudly in spite of himself.

Sweat covered Xeno’s flushed face. “Oh, I hate this.”

“Bullshit,” Stanley voiced out in a hushed voice. “No, you don’t.”

“Yeah, I don’t.”

At some point, Xeno managed to get into the rhythm right, and at some point, their grinding grew even rougher and faster, hotter and slicker. Hands everywhere, clawing each other’s backs. They looked at each other’s faces with the same drunken expression.

“Stan, ah.”

Stanley panted. “Yes… Darling?”

“Kiss me.”

Xeno could feel his release coming soon. His lips tried to meet up with Stanley's, but dizziness overruled his desire. Left with no other choice, he buried his heavy head in the crook of Stanley’s neck.

As his whole body spasmed, and his hips jerked up, Stanley held him in place.

Xeno threw his head back, forced his voice down, and as he came, he threw his head again, now forward, and bit down the side of Stanley’s neck, unrestrained.

Stanley gasped. “Xeno, fuck—"

The pain caught him off guard, and soon after, his climax shot out, accompanied by his own loud, pained, shivering howl.

He leaned languidly against the wall, sticky and aching. “Xeno…”

Xeno lay on his body pliantly, but still got his teeth clenched down his neck, like a stubborn mosquito that refused to go down. Stanley hissed in pain. Cold liquid other than their cum stained his body.

They stayed like that for a long while, too tired to move or talk.

“Is there a possibility you’re a mosquito in alternate universes?” Stanley suddenly asked.

Xeno released Stanley’s neck as he heard his friend’s remark. The familiar sweet flavor on his tongue remained like an exquisite spice before getting washed down by his saliva. He turned his body and lay his head on his friend’s firm chest. He closed his eyes and replied, “Don’t you mean a vampire? Have some shame comparing me to some inelegant creature.”

Stanley felt the area where the ‘vampire’ had just bitten and flinched a bit as blood actually flowed out of it. He put some pressure on it with his shirt and sighed deeply. “Well, I apologize then, Sir Vamp. I hope my blood suited your most distinguished palate,” he said sarcastically.

“It’s so-so,” Xeno huffed. Then he added, “Does it hurt?”

“Guess.”

 Xeno couldn’t see Stanley’s face from his position, but he could practically see him rolling his eyes at him. He let a series of fake ahem’s before saying in a low voice, “I’m sorry.”

Stanley bent his head to him, “Hm? What’s it?”

Xeno glared at him without meaning to. “I said I’m sorr—”

Their lips pressed together in harmony. It was a soft and chaste kiss. It tickled Xeno’s soul. The precious sensation left him as soon as Stanley lifted his head. “There,” Stanley said. He tried to chase after the after-image of the moment, turning his head with great effort, but his friend was already looking at him with his most innocent smile.

He stayed still and savored that expression. Right now, he was facing and looking at only Stanley.

“What are you thinking?” Stanley asked.

“I think I got it, Stan.”

“What?”

“The CRT was supposed to create a stabilizing blanket around the EM field, but the screen was facing the wrong direction. So, the residual field projected forward, interfering with the signal,” Xeno explained. “In short, we created a vortex of interference. If we changed the orientation of the TV, rotated it to the right direction, and added a slight delay just when the field is stable…” He looked at Stanley.

Stanley looked at him with great amazement in his eyes. He brought Xeno close and embraced him tightly.

Chapter Text

“How about this? M-362x? Sounds powerful, it could fry atoms into oblivion... Oh, god. Xeno, you wouldn’t believe this--”

“Stan, I swear if this is another spinning disco microwave…”

Stanley pressed the bright button on the microwave, which he was eyeing, and looked at Xeno with expectant eyes.

Xeno’s ears perked up as they picked up such a familiar melody. “Goodness, it sings?” he asked with a bit of surprise. The tacky galaxy-themed microwave was playing the tune of ‘Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star,' an octave higher.

“Man, we should get it. Maybe it’ll stabilize the frequency of that EM field.”

Xeno gave him an exasperated huff. “You mean it’ll interfere with the signal, right? Come on, let’s get the usual and get out of here,” the man said as he sauntered off the electronic aisle. Stanley ran up to him and blocked his way.

“But Xeno, imagine the possibilities.”

“What possibilities?”

“Imagine waiting for your food to heat up in this while serenading you with Radiohead or My Chemical Romance. Isn’t that sick as hell?”

Xeno stopped in his tracks. He lowered his head, supporting it with his hand, and seemed to actually consider it for a bit. “That… is an interesting proposition.”

“So--?”

“But no,” Xeno said flatly. “We are not using a musical microwave for the time machine.”

Stanley’s expression dampened as he clicked his tongue. “Tsk.”

Xeno smiled. He brought his hand to his chin and said seriously, “Next time or sometime in the future… I could program a normal microwave for you so you could watch your burrito spin while it hums ‘Welcome to the Black Parade’ to you.

“Nice,” Stanley expressed as he gave him a thumbs-up and started whistling the song.

They only had a week—six days to be precise—to finish the time machine. Xeno managed to figure out what was wrong with it thanks to some unconventional (or absurd) means, but the important thing was that they would finally be able to get it right.

Stanley wasn’t a bit worried. He placed his trust in Xeno, similar to how he would expect to see the sun every morning. It was absolute. Sometimes, he could see the hints of doubt cloud Xeno’s eyes, but ever since the scientist spilled his emotions so outwardly that one moment, he served only to reassure him that nothing would change between them, whether it was now or in the future.

In the man’s defense, Xeno’s worry was well-founded. Even the Xeno of the future mentioned something along the lines of living in a split reality already. He was a man of logic, after all. However, from Stanley’s perspective, such worries never occupied his thoughts nor did they ever cross his mind, for he was certain every version of Stanley Snyder would end up finding Xeno Houston Wingfield and latch himself to him without any second thoughts.

It only made Stanley’s heart feel heavy, knowing that Xeno carried the thought of him not being his, and yet still proceeded to help with the time machine.

A voice suddenly resounded. “Shoot your shot and save more! Get your shopping discount now!”

Stanley whipped his head to the saleslady. Then, he heard Xeno exhale under his breath: “A game for a discount? How delightfully capitalist.”

Amused Stanley grabbed Xeno, who was pushing their cart of a microwave oven, and led him in the direction of the pretty woman, who was hyping the promo up. “Hit the targets within three attempts and get 20% off, it says.”

“We’re short on time. Let’s pay up, so we can work on the time machine already.”

“Aren’t we broke cuz we’re buying so many microwaves? Leave this to me.”

Stanley’s feet carried them to the mini shooting range near the customer service area. The blond held a bright neon green plastic gun and entered a solid stance to aim at the moving targets of cardboard shaped like monkeys.

Stanley slowly narrowed his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Xeno asked.

Stanley didn’t reply. He couldn’t exactly say he had some personal vendetta against apes or anything that resembled apes. So, he shook his head along with the unsavory thoughts and confidently lifted the gun. “Nothing,” he replied.

The scientist formed an “X” with his fingers. “No humidity in here. Wind is also irrelevant in the present conditions. Angle your gun 12 degrees higher to take advantage of—"

 “Shhh, I got this, darling.”

Before Xeno could reply, Stanley had already fired the first shot, and the second and third came after successively. The first hit the farthest target, the second followed to hit the one in the middle, and then the third shot knocked the nearest monkey.

He lowered the plastic gun and exhaled with great satisfaction. The shots he fired were a bit personal, but he felt great! Eyes fixed on Xeno, he winked at him as he said, “Told ya.”

The man who was in charge of checking the targets couldn’t help but blow an amazed whistle before he could confirm to his colleague the feat the blond just achieved. The same saleslady from before blinked slowly as she seemed to find it hard to process the information relayed to her, but was quick to respond when she noticed Xeno staring at her blankly.

“Congratulations! You’re the first customer to hit all the targets within three shots!” She handed Stanley a piece of paper and said, “Please show this to the cashier when you pay to claim your discount. Thank you for playing!”

Stanley could see her big, bright smile, but thought it was funny how her perfectly painted eyebrows twitched and twisted at the words she didn’t expect to let go for at least the whole duration of the game promo. After grabbing his prize, he turned to Xeno and started waving it at his face.

Every time Xeno tried to grab it, Stanley lifted it above his head like he was playing with a house cat, provoking its playful yet animalistic instinct. His friend’s scowling face was what he got in return.

After several tries, Xeno finally managed to snatch the paper. He secured it in his pocket, then pushed their cart, leaving Stanley alone in the shooting range.

Stanley chased after him. “Hey, I think I deserve something for that, right?”

“I was just about to praise your elegant execution, but you just have to be a bitch about it.”

Stanley snickered heartily. “Sorry, can’t help it. You were cute—Hey, why are you walking fast? But seriously, I’m great, right?”

Once they reached the long queue to the cashier, Xeno slowed his steps. He turned to Stanley’s direction and whispered, “You were cool.”

Stanley felt his heart full. There was a different giddy feeling that surged in his chest compared to the usual ones he experienced with Xeno in the future. Would it be creepy to say he felt like he just experienced falling in love with his childhood friend the second time around? He had known the man almost his whole life, but he made him feel like a teenager in love in their honeymoon phase. Even he was grossed out by his own sentimental thoughts.

However, knowing he had to go soon made him feel melancholic. He looked at the young scientist beside him. Dark bags were visible under his eyes, but those onyxes still glimmered with great expectations like an endless pit of hope. Not yet tainted by society, not yet filled with questionable ambitions. He, at the same time, (the present him in this timeline), hadn’t yet tasted the bitterness of war, hadn’t yet realized how heavy human lives could weigh.

How great would it be… for things to remain like this for eternity…

“Xeno,” Stanley called. He fiddled with the pack of cigarettes in his hand as an attempt to stop himself from bringing a stick to his lips inside the restaurant.

He and Xeno were supposed to head home after getting their hands on the microwave, but Xeno’s parents called him to say that they were home for once. If he and Xeno went home now, they would surely be interrogated about the missing appliances in their house. Their heads ached at the thought of it and couldn’t afford to spend their precious time explaining—or rather, concocting excuses that could satisfy them, if there were any.

So, they chose to abandon coming to Xeno’s house altogether until his parents were gone. In the meantime, they decided to stop by a nearby Mexican restaurant for lunch with the money they just saved from the discount.

“What is it?” Xeno replied without looking at Stanley. He continuously replied to his parents’ texts of inquiry from the time they received their food until they finished eating it.

“Supposing you only have a week to live, how would you spend your remaining time?”

Xeno brought his phone down to the table. He looked at his friend sitting across from him. “Where did that come from? Oh, never mind. I believe I know what is on your mind.” He took a quick sip from the glass of cold water near him. Then he said, “First, your question is vague. Help me understand it. Why would I only have a week to live? Do I have a certain type of illness incurable with present medical technology? Did NASA monitor an incoming asteroid hitting the Earth at an unbelievable speed? Did the American government order the extermination of people with bright minds? Or perhaps it is all of the above? If that were the case, I’m confident I could survive them all.”

Stanley couldn’t control a smile forming on his face.

“Firstly, I would build an underground science organization and lead a group of elegant scientists to put their minds at work—with all of them in one place, I doubt my supposed illness would stand a chance. Then, I would develop an asteroid-deflecting technology and erase the threat to humanity’s survival. Conversely, if the government is involved, I could simply create a protective haven for the bright minds, safeguarding them and me from the asteroid and annihilating the other useless people outside.” Xeno painted a dark grin on his face. “It’s called killing two birds with one stone.”

Stanley snorted. His smile reached his ears. “You’re always eager to start a science rebellion.”

Xeno nodded. “Only if it is necessary, of course.” He brought the glass of water to his lips once more and drank the remaining liquid as if it were some exquisite wine. After putting it down, he started tracing his slender fingers around its rim with a mysterious daze in his eyes. He was quiet for a while, then he opened his mouth, “But even if after that, the end was still inevitable… I suppose I would just stop outsmarting it.”

Stanley blinked, surprised.

“I would catalog every unsaid theory I never published. I would entrust it to… let’s say… a protégé—taking one wouldn’t be so bad.” Xeno nodded as if convincing himself. “If they possess a brain that could rival mine, they could continue the search for answers I couldn’t unveil. Then,” he paused, then fixed his gaze on his friend’s amber eyes. “I would spend my remaining time with those whom I truly care about--talking and eating with them just like what we are doing right now. And if the conditions may be so kind as to allow it, we could also go stargazing; I believe it has been a while since the last time we did it.”

As Xeno’s human side seeped out, Stanley held his breath and closed his eyes.

“Since we were twelve.”

“Yes… yes. You’re right, Stan.”

Stanley leaned his back against his chair. “Stargazing while countless asteroids rain down on us sure does sound romantic.”

“Well, everything I said is only hypothetical. Don’t take it seriously.” The scientist tore his eye contact with his friend and focused on the condensation on his glass, finding it suddenly so interesting. “How about you?” he asked. He cleared his throat twice. “How could you remain calm when facing the dangers of warfare?”

Silence broke out.

Stanley stopped fiddling with the pack of cigarettes in his hand and stretched his arms exaggeratedly. He couldn’t let Xeno know about that fact yet, for it could change the future they had, so he remained quiet and unbending.

He tried not to make it obvious. He even made sure to do his military exercise whenever Xeno wasn’t at home, but the scientist’s deduction skills were apparently just that good, and he didn’t know whether he should feel amazed or horrified… On second thought, he was sure he felt both.

“Why the random question?” he asked.

“I thought we were throwing hypothetical questions at each other?” The scientist explained, “You were always a good marksman, so I didn’t think much about it. But your posture, your gait, your stern expression that inadvertently peeks out, the unfounded confidence you exude… tell me a story I haven’t had the opportunity to know yet.”

“…”

As the blocks of ice in Xeno’s glass slowly melted, they created a crisp clinking sound that soothed Stanley’s anxiety. Brain empty, he shrugged his shoulders and said, “If someone were thrown into a war, they’d need to adapt. Naturally, I’d learn how to calculate risks in seconds and accept damn well that sometimes, survival doesn’t mean comin’ out unscathed.”

Stanley’s answer was sincere. He had experienced it and learned about it the hard way.

He softened his tone. “But what would really make everything bearable is when something, or someone, would remind me to keep holdin’ on. That’d keep me goin’.”

Xeno stared at him with widened eyes.

“Hypothetically speaking, anyway,” Stanley immediately added.

“Hypothetically, of course.” Xeno smiled bitterly and reverted to his grim expression from earlier. “I swear, Stanley Snyder, if I learned you made a huge decision without consulting me first, I’m going to throw you out the window.”

Stanley's laugh, which started boisterously, eventually devolved into nervous giggles paired with cold sweat on his back.

___

Four days had passed since Stanley felt the warm sunlight on his skin. His system craved for nicotine, while his body screamed for sleep. Abusing his body to the bone wasn’t unknown to him, but he was only learning now how completely different working on a science project he was directly involved in was. He felt the sudden heavy pressure on his back and the stress that started building up with every second that passed.

“Now, put the regulator in place just like before—”

Stanley let Xeno’s voice guide him through the completion of the time machine. Once done, he wiped the sweat on his forehead with his shirt and sighed heavily. “This gotta be one of the few experiences in my life where I had to exercise the most patience,” Stanley said. “Even more with my sniper job,” he thought.

“That means you haven’t lived enough yet,” Xeno retorted. “The beauty of science reveals itself not in the result, but—”

“—in the process. Yep, yep. Been there, don’t yap anymore.”

Xeno lowered his head and exhaled. “Well, then. Lo and behold!” He extended his arms to his side as they both marveled at their creation.

Compared to their previous attempts, the appearance of the time machine improved overall, thanks to the scientist who valued aesthetics the same way he valued logic.

The microwave stood in the middle of it all, raised on a black customized steel rack, which Stanley remembered putting his effort into designing. Throughout their project, Stanley pitched some of his ideas, and Xeno carefully considered the non-outrageous ones before obliging. Stanley couldn’t hide the overflowing gratification he felt whenever Xeno accepted his suggestions.

Behind it, a huge CRT television flickered softly, facing the microwave, to ensure its glass was tuned as a quantum field stabilizer. The whole thing was put together by a combination of thin and thick cables connected to Xeno’s repurposed laptop that showed a custom interface that acted as the machine’s main control panel. On the microwave cover, an iconic small “X” mark indicated Xeno’s initial.

“Damn, I’m gettin’ teary-eyed. Can I name it?”

Xeno shook his head. “I already named it.”

“What?”

Xeno pointed at the label that mysteriously appeared on the side of the oven, “SX – Temporal Quantum Channel.”

“What does ‘SX’ stand for?” Stanley asked.

Xeno slid his arms down on his back and glanced at the ceiling. His lips twitched before he slowly turned his head to the side, hiding whatever expression he was wearing. “It stands for Spacetime eXchange. The machine sends messages through the exchange of phonewave signals through the spacetime. It’s elegant and straight to the point.”

Stanley hummed. “But that’s boring. I was thinking of ‘Timey McKiney’ or ‘Quantum Tunnel, QT (cutie)’ for short.

Xeno turns to him, his expression scrunched up, horrified. “Stan, we have to do something with your atrocious naming sense.”

----

Stanley vividly remembered how their previous attempts to relay messages in the future went. The first ended with him almost getting caught up in an explosion with Xeno, and the succeeding ones barely had anything notable to mention.

His heart raced loudly. He typed the message, which he had already memorized, on the phone, which read:

“Security breach: 05/19/57xx, approx. 16:10. Unknown armed unit enters via West Corridor. Evacuation protocol advised. Prepare in advance. -S”

He held back his breath and released it only once Xeno patted him by the shoulder.

“Are you ready?” Xeno asked.

Stanley nodded his head slowly. If the message was sent successfully, his mission here would be over. He stared at the screen of the phone, his hands hovering over the send button. “But before anything else--” he said as he opened his arms wide. “Can we?”

“Hmp. I suppose we can,” Xeno replied while smiling. The scientist erased the distance they had and softly rested his head on his friend’s shoulder. Stanley brought him in a warm embrace, inhaling Xeno’s scent that he realized was more addictive to him than nicotine.

“Once I send this message, will I be directly transported to my own timeline?”

“In theory, yes, you should be.”

“OK. Got it.”

Xeno raised his head, and Stanley gratefully accepted the invitation. Their lips met each other, melting into each other’s warmth. They closed their eyes and felt the moment that seemed to slow down at the mercy of Time. Once they separated, they stared at each other’s eyes with knowing glances. “Have a nice trip,” Xeno said.

Stanley smiled and sent the message.

His mind went black.

___

Xeno was sitting by the dinner table. He silently ate the burned egg he had cooked earlier as he busily went through various academic journals on his laptop. His eyes scanned through the paragraph he was trying to read for the fifth time. He had been staring at it for the last ten minutes. He rubbed his eyes with his fingers in annoyance.

He looked around the kitchen and found it eerie how quiet and dark it was. The silence that he was so used to before sounded unfamiliar right now, bringing a heavy air of foreboding. He checked the time on his laptop. Just in time. He closed it and stood up, brushing the lint from his white coat as he did so. He also checked for any wrinkles on his clothes. Once he deemed everything good, he placed the dishes in the sink and walked off.

It had been two months since the future Stanley landed in his life. And it had been exactly a week since they finished the time machine. After that, things moved on, and he began his internship at NASA Johnson Space Center. So far, things had been going well. He had some seniors and colleagues he didn’t click with, but he rationalized that it must be the price of getting to his dream job at an early age. Oh, the woes of intelligent people!

He grabbed his bag from the table and turned to the door. As if remembering something, he suddenly looked back.

“I’ll be back,” he said.

Through the dimly lighted room, his words were directed at the man sitting silently on the couch. He had his head down and blew out poisonous gas straight from his lungs.

The blond slowly lifted his head. Devoid of light, his eyes looked at him blankly. He didn’t say anything, but he slightly nodded and then continued to puff smoke down his throat.

It had been two months since the future Stanley landed in his life. And it had been exactly a week since the message failed to send.

Chapter Text

Stanley’s feelings for Xeno came with unconditional loyalty. It assented to the Natural Order—like how guns go off with loud bangs, how deep cuts extract a pain that stings, or how evil ends up in sin.

Sure, he would carry his sins as well. He already made the proud declaration to follow him through hell. Once they fell to it, he would just walk beside him and be his friend. He had always been, anyway.

If Xeno told him to help with his science world domination or fly to the moon and become a hero, he would. In fact, he managed to fulfill those already.

If Xeno told him to go back in time and change the future, he would, as well.

Yet, he felt it in the breath of his lungs—the suffocating and dizzying scent of poison. It enveloped him whole, along with darkness that seemed to whisper something into his ears. He exhaled at once, pushing the incense-smoke from his stiff face. The murmurs didn’t halt, however. He tried to block them with his wandering thoughts.

They had been separated several times before. Their jobs rarely allowed them time to spare for themselves, much less for each other. He persevered, though, through the face of danger, at the cold doorstep of death. All he could do was anchor his trifling existence to his huge, overwhelming one, and hope for the best. What mattered most was that by the end of it all, he would go home to his side where he knew he belonged.

Similarly, he had unhesitatingly laid his life down for him once; apparently, there is no greater love than this. Let his life be a leverage as long as he gains freedom. Yes, lock his statue away. Don’t even let him see light anymore because nothing other than him could ever make his sacrifice worth it, not even the kind and comforting kiss of the sun against his chilled bones and chipped soul.

“I’m back—” a voice announced. “—for a while now.”

Stanley slowly raised his head. Oh, how blinding Xeno looked. It was a mystery that he hadn’t noticed him approach until now. He squinted and turned his head away from him despite the desire to see more. He let a rough groan, one that he didn’t expect to come out of himself. His mouth was dry.

Xeno looked at him, worried but mostly upset. “So, you wouldn’t spare me any of your words, nor look at me anymore, is that it?” He walked closer and pinched Stanley’s chin to make him look at him. “When was the last time you even took a shower? You look terrible. Even the scuttling squirrels I saw hiding behind the trash bins this morning looked better than this.”

Hearing no response, the scientist pursed his lips. His expression darkened, erased of any traces of concern. “Stan, you fool,” he said as he turned away.

Stanley could only watch as Xeno’s steps grew softer and softer and disappeared from his sight. He leaned back on the couch and lit a cigarette.

He didn’t choose to mope around like this either. He recalled that day when he pressed ‘send’ on his phone, his mind only thought of completing his mission. He waited for his consciousness to float like before, closing his eyes to prepare for the nausea that was about to hit, but nothing happened.

He waited. Waited. For a long time. But nothing happened.

When he opened his eyes. Xeno looked at him, aghast. Stanley stood where he was, frozen for who knew how long.

Following that, Xeno busied himself with the last two days, refusing to eat, sleep, or even take a shower. He tinkered away with his chafed palms, with his pure desperation.

“It’s okay, Stan. We’ll get your message sent…”

Stanley observed his childhood friend’s face. He wore an expression that he thought Xeno didn’t suit at all. A great scientist like him should have a wide smile on his lips and sparkles in his pair of dark gemstone eyes, and not an expression that reeked of helplessness.

“…”

“Don’t worry. We’re going to complete this. I promise you…”

However, Xeno wasn’t able to fulfill that promise. The time machine didn’t react to anything they tried to send while time continued to pass, waiting for no one.

Stanley stared at the clock. Just a few minutes before the date became exactly two months since he jumped back in time. “Xeno, just stop,” he said.

Xeno, who was dislodging the parts of the microwave, shook his head. “No, we still have three minutes. Let me reorganize the data mentally and try to replace the disassembled parts. Then, we can try again.”

Out of habit, Stanley pushed a cigarette into his mouth. He took a drag and then said, “It’s over.”

“NO!”

“Yes.”

Xeno stopped his toiling hands and turned to him. “No…”

The time limit was two months. Within those two months, we would be sent back automatically to his timeline. His heart beat fast in his chest, and he almost thought he was having a panic attack.

The sound of the clock’s second hand was threatening to him. It was heavy and dangerous. It was fast yet steady. It was gentle yet merciless.

Then, three minutes passed.

But once more, nothing happened.

It was perhaps during that time that Stanley knew he might not be able to return.

Stanley finished his cigarette and looked at the ceiling. The voices he was hearing were once again awakened, growing louder every minute. He heaved a deep sigh and closed his weary eyes.

Stanley failed his mission. That fact was clear as day. However, here was what the voices in his head—that oddly sounded like his own voice—whispered:

“If you can’t go back, then so be it. Xeno is still here, isn’t he? You would still be living with him, anyway. You weren’t able to save him in the future, but you still can in this present timeline.”

Stanley frowned. “Wouldn’t that be betraying Xeno? And everyone?”

“How so? You already know how the future went, don’t you? Then, just follow it. In fact, wouldn’t this be a great opportunity to relive your life with him?”

He nodded. He wasn’t opposed to the idea. Still, he asked, “What if that ended up changing the future?”

“But that’s the goal, isn’t it? Change the future and save everyone. Not only that, but because you have knowledge of the future, you could make decisions advantageous to your position. You're free to do whatever you want.”

Stanley paused and thought deeply. “What if I ended up destroying the future instead?”

The voice went silent for a bit. Then, when it sounded again, it changed entirely. In a deep voice he was so fond of, it whispered, “You, my ultimate knight? You might think your mission failed the moment you failed to send the message, but aren’t you still here for a reason?”

“That…” He couldn’t find the right words to reply. The voice didn’t provide him with a basis for its words, yet they resonated deeply with him. They were words he wanted to hear.

“Will you stay here with ‘me’?

Stanley opened his eyes. “Yes. I will,” he replied as if it was it were laid down by, again, the Natural Order.

___

Xeno threw himself onto his bed. He lay on his stomach and felt the empty side of it. Remembering who used to lie down on it made him sit down and throw punches at it.

Ever since Stanley’s two months were up, the blond stopped sleeping beside him, choosing not to part with the couch instead. When the man realized he might not be able to return to his timeline, he suddenly grew distant and cold, growing taciturn as days continued to pass.

Xeno could understand Stanley’s depressive state. Who wouldn’t? A mere glance at his appearance could reveal so much. He might not know the whole deal about the message (that he tried so much not to think about lest he figure it out and change the future), but he felt the overwhelming pressure his friend tried to bear. Letting all of it be released at once would have felt so excruciating. Xeno hated seeing Stanley like that. He would provide comfort whenever he could and assured him that he would find the error in their project so that he could return to his original timeline.

However, the man seemed to have convinced himself that he would be trapped in this timeline forever. And that pissed Xeno off. Not because Stanley didn’t believe he could fix the machine, but because he seemed to have given up on everything.

Stanley, in his memory, wasn’t the type of man who would cower in despair. He was a brave and elegant soul who might tumble here and there but would eventually get things right. That was the kind of man Stanley Snyder was.

Xeno tightened his expression. He must convince his childhood friend to continue working on the time machine.

He was persuaded by him before, and now it was his turn. Surely, it would only take them one serious talk, right?

___

On his day off, Xeno hurriedly went to change out of his pajamas and looked for Stanley. Surprisingly, he couldn’t find him on the coach he usually hated getting out of. His eyes surveyed the living room.

Xeno panicked.

He ran to the kitchen, to the lab, to the bathroom, but he was nowhere to be seen. As he put on his shoes to look for him outside, the door burst open, and there, the person he was searching for stared at him with a surprised expression.

“Are you goin’ somewhere?”

“Stan! Where have you been?!”

“Relax, man. Just bought some cigs. It’s been a while since I last went outside.”

Xeno tried to calm his heart, which was still wracked by panic. He didn’t notice it immediately, but Stanley cleaned himself up from his pitiful appearance, his clothes new and his face clean. The blond entered the house and closed the door with his usual nonchalance.

“What’s up?”

“What caused the change?” Xeno pushed aside how things were left since they last talked, but he couldn’t shake off the awkwardness his voice produced and hoped his friend didn’t notice, or if he did, he hoped he wouldn’t mention it.

“Nothin’. I was just awakened by your words last time. I looked like shit, and I realized I needed to touch grass.”

Xeno looked at Stanley dubiously. He looked gorgeous. His blonde hair grew long out of neglect, but it oddly accentuated his face’s feminine side. His lips were painted with an unusual light pink, relaxing his otherwise sharp features. His eyes, especially, were so mesmerizing. They peeked behind his unnecessarily long lashes and gave Stanley an uncharacteristically bright look that made him shiver. Xeno had to gulp to wake himself from their hypnotic spell.

“Stan, I have something to tell you,” Xeno began. The quicker they could sort things out, the better.

“Really? Perfect. Me as well,” Stanley said with a smile.

“Oh? Then… you may go first,” Xeno replied.

Stanley put his hands behind him and began circling Xeno with light taps of his feet. Xeno followed his gaze and thought of whatever shenanigans the blond would surprise him with. So, he put his guard up and folded his arms on his chest. Stanley’s actions reminded him of a documentary he watched as a kid about how tiger sharks use the same tactic to get a firm estimate of their prey and to know which angle they should strike it best.

Then, Stanley came to an abrupt stop. Xeno forced himself not to jolt when the blond grabbed one of his hands.

“I’ve decided to stay here,” said Stanley after planting a soft kiss on the back of his palm.

Xeno’s face darkened.

Stanley said his words as if they were some sacred vow. It made him quiver.

Normally, he would find them poetic, romantic, even. Yeah, truth be told, he would totally be into that. However, the meaning behind them implied something that got under his skin, and he was lost for words to describe the overwhelming feelings he was contemplating how to show.

Mistaking his silence for not understanding, Stanley added, “I’m aware of how you’re still working on the time machine behind my back, on top of your work at NASA. Stop workin’ on it—you’ll just waste your time. I’m fine here, as long as I have you.”

The scientist was silent for a while. He whispered something in a low voice that Stanley couldn’t catch well enough.

“Don’t…d…me.”

From Stanley’s perspective, Xeno had his head lowered with the hand he was holding clenched in a fist. Stanley massaged and rubbed his friend’s knuckle. “What’s wrong, Xeno?”

Xeno brushed his hand away. “I SAID DON’T FUCK WITH ME!”

Without even a second after that, he opened his fist and threw it in a full swing.

The sound of palm hitting against the face almost echoed throughout the room, highlighting how silence pervaded the space shared by the two of them.

Stanley revealed an expression that stated how confused he was, for how blank it appeared. He slowly brought a hand to his stinging red cheek.

The same hand that he kissed so tenderly ended up slapping him.

“ARE YOU GIVING UP?”

Stanley looked at him with an ugly expression. “I’m not giving anything up!” he expressed. “I just saw a different perspective on this problem, and came up with a different solution that will lead to the same result,” he said, evidently tailoring his words to satisfy Xeno’s scientific disposition.

“I’m disappointed in you, Stan,” Xeno said in one breath. The tone he used dictated that he meant his words.

Stanley flinched at the words. He glared at his childhood friend. He felt dizzy. As he steadied himself, he snorted coldly. “You’ve got no damn right to say that to me…”

“Oh, really? I didn’t know I needed your approval for whatever I feel about you,” Xeno replied. Instead of stepping backward, Xeno stepped forward; a slight movement would make their faces touch each other. He continued, “Then, I apologize. I thought human beings are entitled to their own feelings, but it seems like I’m in the wrong.”

Stanley sighed. “Xeno, shut your mouth and calm down. I, staying here, is the optimal course of action. I may not be able to explain everything right now, but in the future, you’ll see how this is for your sake as well. Listen to me--”

“No, I won’t,” Xeno interrupted. “Let me repeat—I’m disappointed in you.”

Something in Stanley snapped. Perhaps it was his thinning patience or his last remaining sanity, but something in him indeed snapped in a way that made him grab Xeno’s shoulder and almost push him violently, so he could stop the man from spilling words that would stab him further from the inside.

“WHAT DO YOU EVEN KNOW?!” he exclaimed.

He didn’t just support his crazy science dictatorship, fly a rocket ship to the moon to slay their enemy, and go back in time to try saving everyone just to hear those words.

He complained about Xeno’s unbelievable plans every so often, but never went against any of his words. Hell, he had never even failed to say “I can” to his mostly unreasonable requests. So, he, of all people, had no right to tell him off, say to his face he was disappointed in him, or make him feel like he had failed as a human being.

“YOU KNOW NOTHING!” Stanley’s eyes stung, bloodshot. “YOU KNOW NOTHING OF THE THINGS I HAD TO GO THROUGH FOR YOU!”

“YOU’RE RIGHT!” Xeno’s voice cracked. “AND I COULDN’T CARE LESS FOR THEM!”

Stanley took a sharp breath in. “HOW DARE YOU?!”

Xeno lowered his head. “You claimed you’d gone through things for me. But Stan, as you just said, I know nothing about them… You didn’t do them for the ‘me’ right now. You did them for a future I don’t know of, one of which we have no guarantee that we can both reach. Thus, I have nothing to do with them.”

“You’re cruel,” Stanley said with a forced laugh.

Xeno shook his head. “No, you are.”

Stanley raised a brow.

“I would like it better if you get angry at me, yell at me for not getting that time machine to work on time,” Xeno said while trembling in spite of himself.

Stanley was taken aback. Beads of tears flowed out from Xeno’s eyes to his cheeks. Stanley’s heart ached at the sight of it. Felt like bleeding.

“COME ON, SHOUT AT ME!” Xeno yelled. “WHY WOULDN’T YOU SAY IT BACK? SAY YOU’RE DISAPPOINTED IN ME TOO!”

“No,” Stanley replied. He tightened his grip on Xeno’s shoulders. “That’s not it…”

Xeno laughed hysterically. “That’s what I thought,” he replied. “You would rather talk of giving up upon the convenient excuse of saying it’s for my sake.” His eyes, which continued to gleam with tears, stared at him coldly.

Stanley let go of Xeno’s shoulders and smiled bitterly. “Why must you always be against me?”

Against his nicotine addiction. Against him having the final say in their silly arguments. Against him staying and saving him from his imminent death.

Soon, hot liquid also came out of Stanley’s eyes. The two of them sobbed quietly, blurring their vision so badly to even see how their bodies both itched to comfort each other.

___

 Days continued to pass slowly. In a blink of the eye, they turned into a week and many more.

Stanley went back to his house and never visited Xeno again after their ‘that’. Xeno wondered if this was how their reality would branch off, and this timeline would be one where he and Stanley drifted apart. He sighed at the thought, but could only sigh more because of how much he hated it.

He still held hope in his heart, but how about Stanley? When he last saw him, he saw how cynical his expression was, refusing to talk to him or even say goodbye.

Later, Xeno found out from Stanley’s mother that he enlisted in the military when they bumped into each other in the grocery store.

“What?” Xeno blinked several times successively.

Mrs. Snyder beamed with delight. “That’s right! I thought he already told you about it.”

“No…” Xeno steadied himself. “Is he--?”

Mrs. Snyder seemed surprised, but soon after, a wide smile appeared on her elegant face. She eyed him, and with a knowing but mocking tone, she said, “He’d be going in a week. Yes, it’s sad to be separated, but you’re both adults now. You have to pursue your respective careers and focus on living your own lives now.”

Xeno's mind shut down completely. After Mrs. Snyder said her perfunctory ‘see you later,’ Xeno let his body go on autopilot to carry out his shopping for him.

His mind drifted aimlessly.

___

A series of annoying thuds woke Stanley from his sleep. He frowned at the realization that he was awake, for it had been a while since he had had a good sleep. His nightmares came back, unfortunately. And within this rare time when he was sleeping peacefully, some mysterious sounds roused him—how very annoying.

Must be the wind, he thought. He stirred on his bed and forced his eyes shut. Yet, the sounds didn’t stop. In fact, they only grew louder and more incessant. He sat up and growled to find where the sounds came from.

He turned his head. He was stunned speechless.

A pair of pitch-black eyes stared at him.

From the window.

“How did he even get here? Did he jump off the fence? Wait, isn’t this the second floor? How is he doing it?” He wondered. The image of Xeno jumping off the fence in his elegant (or inelegant) manner was too funny not to imagine. Similarly, figuring out how he could reach his window was equally entertaining.

“More importantly, why is he here?”

Stanley thought for a bit. He wanted to open the window and let Xeno in, just like how Xeno wholeheartedly accepted him with his open arms before. However, with their current state, he doubted if that was still going to happen.

Then, Xeno craned his neck and stuck his forehead to his window. Stanley squinted and realized that Xeno was relaying a message to him in Morse code.

…i….o…t

“Idiot”

“…”

Stanley had a sudden burst of energy and forgot about being sleep-deprived as he got out of bed, slid some house slippers on, grabbed a cigarette from the nightstand, and then burst the window open.

“Whaddya say?!” Stanley exclaimed.

“What took you so long? Are you still dreaming?” Xeno brought a palm to his cheek, and Stanley flinched instinctively. Fortunately, his friend only did a few light taps on his cheek and did nothing more. “There, there. You’re awake now,” he said.

Stanley leaned his arms on the windowsill. Xeno was standing on an industrial steel ladder he had no idea where he got it from. He wore a huge-ass backpack, and contrary to his usual clothes, he was wearing a lightweight jacket and shorts, layered with some leggings underneath—how interesting.

“Stop your ogling and move. Let’s go.”

“Where to?”

Xeno offered him his hand and signaled with his head to look above.

Stanley’s mind seemed to buffer at first, but after a while, he reached Xeno’s hand and let himself be escorted down the ladder to what he called in his mind the ‘stairway to hell.’

“Supposing you only have a week to live, how would you spend your remaining time?”

Stanley remembered asking that question to Xeno. He also remembered his answer to it. How strange that it had only been a few weeks since then, but it already felt like a distant memory in his mind.

He watched Xeno set up his jet-black telescope, which looked so expensive that he enthusiastically volunteered to become a human stand for the flashlight instead of helping set it up. He was even secretly grateful that his friend didn’t let him carry his bag for him when he offered earlier. He was confident he didn’t have the money to recompense for it if he ever broke it.

After locking the telescope into its place, Xeno looked at the watch around his wrist. “12:43. We’re a bit late, but this will do.”

Stanley turned the flashlight off. They were in the middle of nowhere, the same place where they first met each other when they were eleven, when they were trying out that whole damn rail gun. Xeno led him here out of nowhere, and now, he was here again, now, staring at the night sky.

“Oh, it’s a moonless night,” he thought.

“Stan, come here.”

Stanley woke up from his stupor. It was the first time Xeno called his name since they last met. He wished he could shut his heart up from beating too loudly. He couldn’t understand how a single syllable could affect him so much.

“Hm?”

Xeno took a step back from the telescope and gestured. Stanley leaned his face into the eyepiece.

“What can you say?” Xeno asked with a bit of smugness.

Stanley must have forgotten to take a breath, for when he did, he took a very deep and very long one. “Man, ‘tis sick.”

“You could react more, you know?” Xeno said.

“You asked me and I answered. What’s sick is sick.” Stanley laughed, but his head didn’t move from the telescope. “Please help me know what I’m seeing, doc.”

Xeno’s tone livened up. “I’m glad you asked. The brightest one you’re seeing right now is the good old Vega. I said old, but actually, its age is only about one-tenth of the sun's, which is 4.6 billion years old. It’s part of the northern constellation of Lyra. It’s the brightest one.”

“Whoa...”

“You don’t sound impressed.”

That wasn’t true. Stanley was truly impressed. He did manage to witness the wonder of outer space as an astronaut, but seeing the stars from Earth gave him a different feeling of wonder. It was only now that he understood the lyrics of the famous nursery rhyme with his heart.

“I swear I am,” Stanley said as he chuckled. “Just messing with you.”

Xeno gave him an exasperated ‘hmp.’ Then, he said, “The stars are millions or even billions of light years away from us. Thus, the light you see from them right now is actually from how they were in the past. They have traveled great distances to reach us today and surely… in the future too.”

Stanley tore his face away from the telescope. He looked at Xeno.

Xeno wasn’t looking at him. He was looking at the stars above.

So, Stanley also looked above.

The stars were bright even without the help of Xeno’s telescope. He saw them scattered across the night sky, stretched out from all directions, reminding him how small he was.

“How inspiring,” he said.

Xeno nodded. Finally, he stared at his friend and said, “They are, and they aren’t even aware of it.”

“How could stars be self-aware? Aren’t they literally just huge balls of gas? And here I thought you wouldn’t make any errors in science.”

“I don’t mean it in a literal sense, Stan,” Xeno sighed, but then smiled. “Stars, Stan. Stars.”

“Hmn.”

Comfortable silence came upon them. They sat on the blanket Xeno brought and gazed at the stars without saying a word, letting the breeze cool their sticky and sweaty faces.

“By the way,” Stanley said. “I’ll be joining the military.”

Xeno slowly turned his head to him. “I know, you jackass.”

Stanley laughed.

The scientist sighed, his eyes filled with worry. “Is it really necessary?”

“Yep,” Stanley replied. To ensure the future he yearned for came to fruition, he would undergo all the things he had done so before; it was a must, no matter if he decided to stay or continue working on the time machine.

“I see,” Xeno said quietly. He stared at Stanley for a long time but didn’t say anything.

Still, Stanley knew what the gaze meant. He lay on his back and used his arms as a pillow. “Fine, let’s work on that time—”

A loud buzzing noise came from Xeno’s phone. Stanley waited for him to turn it off. Because who calls people at 2 a.m.?

But once Xeno turned his screen on, he stood up at once and went stiff.

Stanley sat up and looked at him with a face of concern. “What’s it?”

Xeno passed him his phone to read.

“Message received and verified—I trust you. Elegant work as always. I’ll see you on the other side. – Dr. X”

Chapter Text

Running with indoor slippers wasn’t exactly a good idea, Stanley noted to himself as he felt them slipping off his feet as he sprinted. At one point, he removed and held them with his hand while the other carried Xeno’s backpack over his shoulder. At one point, he forgot where he was running to and what he and Xeno were supposed to be arguing about. And at one point, he let himself be free with the cool wind brushing his handsome face.

“Be careful with the telescope!” Xeno yelled far behind him. The scientist was clutching his chest as he chased after him. His face, dripping wet with sweat. Poor him. He was wheezing for dear life.

“You good there? Want me to carry you?” Stanley looked back at him.

“My goodness-- Stan. Let me catch… my breath first.”

“No, we have to hurry!” Stanley laughed but still slowed his pace. He wore his slippers back and held out his free hand to him.

Xeno, a bit hesitant, reached and grabbed it. Stanley couldn’t hide his smile. He thought to himself that this was how they were supposed to be—one and connected.

Nothing was sure yet. They still hadn’t confirmed anything from the message. However, what he was feeling was akin to that of a child throwing a tantrum who finally had his mother give in to get what he wanted. Yes, he would still be crying on the outside, but on the inside, he grew excited at the feeling of almost obtaining what he wanted.

Hand in hand, the two of them run-walked across the street with their sweat-filled faces and haggard appearances, with only the stars above as the witness to their testament of peace.

“This is why I told you we should use my babe,” Stanley said.

“No, I’d rather walk kilometers than hear you rev that loud thing up.”

“And see how that brought us here.”

“Shut up, Stan.”

Xeno explained earlier that his smartphone was linked to the microwave to monitor the phonewave activity. It was necessary to take notes on signal changes whenever they attempted to send messages.

“SX must’ve worked the moment we finished aligning the CRT’s position with the microwave. Since we also added a slight delay to the transmission to match the activation of the EM field, we must’ve missed the weak signal it emitted and thought it didn’t send,” Xeno explained while catching his precious breath.

As they took a turn onto their street, Stanley also turned his head to him. “Then, why did the reply take so long? Why haven’t I returned to my timeline yet?”

“That’s what we're about to find out.”

Xeno took his keys out and pushed the door open without his usual care. They both scrambled through the house to reach the lab basement.

The low whirring sound of the machine first welcomed Stanley’s sharp senses. The time machine or SX (to Xeno’s insistence to call it that) still looked the same as when they first completed it, but the surroundings indicated quite the mess that ensued while he was absent, with some metal scraps, various tools, and pieces of paper lying about the floor.

The light inside the microwave flashed on and off, making Xeno make his way to it and step on the various things on the floor. Stanley would like to comment on the lab’s pitiful state if not for the guilt that swelled from his chest coming up to his throat.

“Stan.”  

“What’s up?” Stanley replied as he moved closer.

Stanley’s phone, which was connected to the phone, revealed the same message Xeno received earlier. Stanley’s eyes scrutinized each letter. It was only now that he could truly revel in its existence and the message it conveyed. He stared at it for a long time before asking Xeno his questions.

“Why’s this blinkin’?” Stanley pointed at the microwave.

Xeno took a deep breath. “It’s still picking up signals. However, I don’t think any more messages will appear. It’s just the phonewave residue from before. These types of waves seem to move at a very slow interval, which explains the late reply.”

Stanley nodded. “Then, why am I still here? How can I go back?”

Xeno’s movements looked agitated as his hands continued to inspect the microwave, but his expression was calm. He stopped and faced Stanley. “I still have some questions for you, but I’m afraid of asking them lest it affect the future. However, if you choose to answer them, I might just be able to provide you with answers to your questions.”

“Hmm…” Honestly speaking, he had no idea which information could change the future for the worse. The other side was most likely working on their enemies since receiving his warning, but they didn’t have any guarantee that his actions at the moment could offset everything they had strenuously set up. Still, when he opened his mouth, the words that came out were as sincere as they could be.

“Hit me with them.”

“Are you sure about this, Stan?”

“Yeah, I want to know if I can go back or not.”

“Alright then,” Xeno said. He smiled. “Regarding the content of the message you sent, is it classified information that could impact the whole world… or is it more of a personal one?”

“A mix of both, but more of the latter. It’s important to me. It’s a message of warning...”

Xeno nodded. He took notice of how Stanley seemed to cut his words at the end, but paid no heed. “Then, if it’s a message of warning directed to me, then I assume I will be entangled in a very dangerous incident. Why is it then that you have to go this far back in time?”

Stanley looked at him blankly.

“I mean… I know you didn’t intend to go this far back; you wanted to go back around when we had established ourselves as adults. However, if the situation in the future required you to save me, why not just send you days—no, even hours before the ‘unfortunate’ incident occurred?”

“That—” Stanley tried to recall his memories. Xeno didn’t explain anything about it. The scientist seemed desperate to make a sacrifice if it meant he could send Stanley back in the past. Was it possible that the simple solution slipped his mind due to the fact that he was literally dying and couldn’t think straight?

Xeno observed his friend's reaction before continuing to his next question. “Is the time machine you used to leap through time originally meant for you to use?”

“No. We were short on time, and someone had to be sent back as soon as possible,” Stanley replied mechanically. The previous question still trapped his mind.

“Really?!” Xeno’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Why?”

Xeno tried to put on a calm expression. He shook his head. “No… nothing.” Then, he formed an “X” with his fingers in front of his face and explained, “If what you say is accurate, then it’s not that the future version of myself didn’t think of what I suggested. It’s more like he couldn’t do it.”

Stanley crossed his arms on his chest and tilted his head, urging him to continue.

“I might not have complete knowledge about the time machine you used, but I know that certain variables are necessary for the process. For example, the traveler’s physical mass and mental strength, as well as environmental compatibility, are all taken into consideration. If the time machine wasn’t made for you to use, then adjusting all of those would take time, especially if it was already designed to go back to a specific point in the past.”

“Oh,” Stanley could only mutter.

The time machine was originally for that science brat, Senku. Stanley might not be aware of everything, but Xeno expressed before how he wanted to help that protégé of his reunite with his father.

The current timeline aligned with the time when Ishigami Byakuya was still alive and well, before his first mission in space.

Xeno interrupted his thoughts. “So… This might be embarrassing to admit, but…” Stanley stared at Xeno’s complicated expression. “Instead of prioritizing altering the point where you should land, the future version of myself most likely focused on ensuring your safety by adjusting the machine to accommodate and be synchronized with your body and mental capacity… and was left with no time to calculate time accuracy.”

“So, that was it…” Stanley said.

Seconds after, a burst of laughter echoed throughout the room.

“What’s so funny?!”

“Dude, you’re seriously so stupid,” Stanley said as he wiped a tear. “Seriously, what the fuck. That’s adorably so stupid of you.”

How stupid of him, too, to not realize it.

“Stop saying stupid, you stupid Sta-- Ahem. Putting that aside, we could apply the same logic to the two months you were given.”

It took a while for Stanley to calm down, and that earned him a well-deserved smack on the head. “Hey, stop that, Xeno—hehe.” Stanley cleared his throat and asked, “So that means--?”

Xeno glared at him, but his expression softened as he answered. “It means that the two-month period was just an approximation, whether by error or lack of time to calculate. Don’t worry, you’ll be sent back as long as no new variables present themselves.”

___

Two days later, Stanley was once again staring at a familiar front door as he sat on a chair and waited for Xeno. The scientist worried about his body and had him stay in his house for the time being, at least before he got deployed.

If at one point, he wasn’t returned to his timeline before his service in the military, Xeno insisted he delay it. He mentioned that his memories wouldn’t carry on his past self. He compared it to a paused game wherein his consciousness will resume exactly from the moment he leapt through time. If that happened, Xeno must be there for him to provide him with some plausible explanation. Stanley agreed with that as well.

However, with his current situation of just being kept at home without anything particular to do, he wondered if Xeno just intended for him to be his house dog, waiting for his owner to come home.

“I’m back,” Xeno said as he opened the door.

“Took you long enough,” Stanley said, still sitting on the chair.

“This feels like a déjà vu.”

Stanley chuckled. “Yeah, that’s true.” He eyed his friend. “Are you drunk?”

The scientist with the unusually crooked necktie closed the door behind him and walked to him. He began tousling Stanley’s hair while he himself was hiccupping. “Just tipsy,” he replied.

Stanley grabbed Xeno’s waist and rested his face against his stomach. He savored the feeling of the scientist's touch on his head. “Why? Did something happen?” he asked, muffled.

Xeno stared down at him. “No,” he replied in a drawl. “Stan, look at me.”

“M’kay.” Stanley replied as he lifted his face to meet his. “What’s up, doc?”

“I have a request. hic. Can you do it?”

“Of course I can. Tell me.”

Xeno smiled. “Please destroy SX.”

___

Xeno dazed into nothingness. He could hear the distant sound of banging metals, almost explosive and thundering in his ears. He shuddered at each hit, like he was the one who received them.

He sipped some water from the glass Stanley offered him and bent his head to look at his fidgeting hand on his lap. How very unlikely for him to feel nervous. He drank some more until he felt full, until the sound stopped reverberating in his ears.

After a few minutes, Stanley appeared in the kitchen with him.

“I’m done,” the blond announced.

“Really?” he replied. “Well done, Stan. I appreciate it.”

“You good?”

“Yes. I sobered up several minutes ago.”

The time machine had served its purpose. It brought him quite the heartache to part with it. However, for the future that he had no way of knowing but was important to Stanley, it had to be done.

For it, he drowned himself in a little bit of alcohol.

He figured he would feel gloomy for the following days, but that was all about it.

Stanley hugged him from behind and let himself feel a little bit of comfort for the loss. However, once he realized how he would, once more, have to go through the same pain soon, he grew downcast and inconsolable for the rest of the evening, making Stanley have no choice but to lull him to sleep.

___

Stanley rolled his eyes open. He wasn’t plagued by nightmares this time, but a different kind of feeling stirred in his chest, making it hard to breathe. Thankfully, he wasn’t alone; he had Xeno by his side. They were holding each other in a tight embrace to sleep, like always.

It had been five days since they received the reply to his message.

And he thought it was a little bit too sad to part this way.

“Xeno,” he called out with great difficulty. “Wake up.”

Xeno slowly parted his lids as he rubbed them. He was used to getting roused in the middle of the night. In a grainy voice, he asked, “What happened?”

“I think I’m being brought back.”

“Wha—” Xeno quickly tried to get out of bed, but Stanley gripped his wrist.

“Just stay… here.”

“I will,” Xeno replied. “But let go of me for a second, I have to do something.”

He reluctantly let go. And he heard Xeno almost trip his way to turn the lights on. After that, he went back to lie on the bed beside him.

Stanley couldn’t hold back his chuckle despite feeling short of breath. “What the hell was that?”

The scientist began to move his body so he was on top of him. “I wanted to see your face,” he admitted, unabashed.

Stanley couldn’t decide whether the hotness on his cheeks was brought by Xeno’s effortless suaveness or the fact that his consciousness was about to be sprang to the future. He couldn’t find the exact words on how to reply, or rather, he was robbed of his ability to. He massaged the back of Xeno’s head and began running his fingers through the threads of his silver hair as his face drew closer.

Xeno, on top of him, felt natural, similar to how their lips found familiarity with each other. They had both tasted each other before and were now doing it once more with their mouths opening and closing in sweet succession.

Stanley saw Xeno staring at him deeply; his gaze fixed on his face, having difficulty trying not to blink. When their lips parted for a while, Stanley inhaled deeply.

“I finally made you breathless,” Xeno said.

“Oh, please, you always do, darling,” Stanley replied fondly.

Xeno’s pitch-black eyes froze Stanley in his position. He looked at him with his adorably furrowed brows and a small frown on his face.

“Don’t look at me with those eyes. We’ll see each other soon.”

At those words, Xeno finally blinked. “I don’t know, 13 years seems long, Stan.”

Right, this Xeno didn’t know of the petrification. It would take them more than a decade, more than a millennium, really, to meet again, but that didn’t matter—they would meet again, that was all that mattered.

As his mind wandered, his brain felt like splitting in half. He winced in pain, and Xeno quickly massaged his head to alleviate it. “It seems like this is a goodbye, real one this time,” Stanley said.

Xeno’s frown grew deeper. Yet, he didn’t utter a word. Instead, he forced a smile.

A smile that ended up looking bitter.

Stanley took hold of Xeno’s back on top of him and embraced him even tighter. “Please take care of this good ol’ me. I’m kind of stupid, so it’d help if you’d stay by my side.”

Xeno laughed. “Sure. I’ll be your nagging housewife. That’s a promise, Stan.”

“Then, that’s good,” Stanley said, then paused. He could feel his consciousness drifting. After half a minute, he continued, “I’ll go now.”

“See you in the future, Stan.”

Stanley nodded. “Yeah, see you, Xeno.”

For one last time, they let their lips meet. Their hearts beat against each other, as their skins went sticky with each other’s sweat. They intertwined their fingers and deepened the whole experience.

The last thing Stanley felt was Xeno’s uneven breath against his face, his sweet lips on his own, and the hot tears that fell from his sorrowful eyes to his cold cheeks.

___

The entire thing felt the same as when he first experienced it. He felt the world swinging back and forth and right and left. He tried to keep his consciousness awake and even began counting to help him keep track of time, courtesy of Senku.

It was odd how his thoughts were on that young scientist right now. Perhaps it was because he could somewhat determine that he was hearing his voice in his ears. After mentally counting to 593 seconds, he swore he could distinctly hear Senku’s voice more clearly now.

“His vitals seem steady.”

Stanley flew his eyes open.

A pair of blood-colored eyes, serious but not menacing, stared down at him. “Good morning, Stanley. Can you hear me?”

The monitor beeped and registered his vitals. He was only disoriented for a bit and realized where exactly he was, from the padded bed that he was lying on, the glaring lighting that burned his eyes, and the IV line inserted into his arm.

He didn’t feel any of his limbs and doubted if he could even move any of the muscles around his face. His throat felt dry, and his vision was shaky. With great difficulty, he slowly nodded his head.

“You’re in the medical ward of the science facility. It’s been exactly three weeks since you fell unconscious,” Senku quickly filled him in.

Suddenly, another voice squeaked in. “This is bad!”

Chrome appeared behind Senku and was looking at him as if he had just seen a ghost. “Does this mean the time travel was a success?” he asked his fellow scientist.

Senku replied after cackling. “You’re 10 billion percent correct!”

Chrome looked at Stanley once more. “You’re baaad,” he directed to him. After a while, as if realizing something, he said, “I’ll go get Xeno!”

With that, the youth dashed out of the room with a quick swoosh.

Stanley blinked slowly. His chest was filled with something heavy, but this time, it wasn’t a bad feeling.

They lived. He saved them.

The young scientist, he was left with eyed him suspiciously. Uncannily similar to his mentor, he gave him a mocking huff and then remarked, “Are you getting sappy? Man, age’s really getting into you, huh?”

It was a mystery how Stanley, despite the fact that he couldn’t feel his limbs, still somehow managed to raise a middle finger at him. It was spasming so hard, but at least the negative sentiment went through.

Just at that moment, the door burst open. Stanley saw Xeno enter the ward with a stern expression. His expression alone sent shivers down his spine. With it, he was instantly reminded that he had to put his middle finger down, so he did.

Senku laughed once more. “Hehe, if you’re readily able to throw hands at me, then you’re good. I’ll call Luna to check on you later.” He smiled, then said, “Congratulations on being the first man to travel back in time.” He turned his back on him.

Stanley gave him an annoyed groan, and wow, he sounded like a dying frog. He convinced himself it was because of his recovering condition and not because of his smoking habits. Speaking of which, he looked at Xeno…He badly needed a smoke.

“For now, I’ll leave the two of you to it,” Senku suddenly said as he exited the room, patting Xeno’s shoulder as he passed by him. The younger scientist whispered something into his ear, but Stanley didn’t manage to catch it.

“…”

“So,” Xeno began. He walked and stood beside his bed. He was quiet for a bit, but both his actions and words, even the expression he wore, were all clinical. “You must be feeling disoriented with all of this, Stan. So, let me explain. Three weeks ago, Rachel came up to me with the most horrified expression and told me that you suddenly collapsed at your station—oh, you might not know her, but Ms. Rachel is an aspiring young intern who—”

“I know her,” Stanley interrupted. His voice cracked so badly that he suddenly felt embarrassed for no reason. He cleared his throat and then continued, “She offers me okay-ish coffee whenever I wait for you to finish your work.”

Xeno poured him a glass of water from the bedside table and helped him sit down to drink it carefully. After setting it aside, Stanley continued, “How is she?”

“She’s doing fine,” Xeno replied coolly, devoid of any emotion.

“I’m glad to hear that.” Stanley couldn’t help but smile. Now, he knew what her name was. He continued to eye Xeno up.

“So, to continue,” Xeno said. “We brought you to the hospital to be checked, but doctors found nothing wrong. You were confined there for a few days before I grew impatient and took things into my own hands. I brought you here and decided to monitor your condition myself. Your brainwaves were consistent. I also found no brainstem dysfunction. Yet, you still wouldn’t wake up.”

Stanley listened intently, not interrupting him once. It seemed like only a few minutes had passed since he last saw him. Yet, he missed this nerd dearly.

“Then, I received that mysterious message.” Xeno wore an indescribable expression. “It was a mystery, honestly. I know it wasn’t logical, but I had a strong inclination to believe in it. It was then that I immediately managed to connect the dots to it with your strange sleeping beauty condition.”

Xeno exhaled deeply for a reason other than catching his breath. He continued, “We followed your warning and eventually managed to catch those apes by surprise. You wouldn’t believe it, Stan. Do you remember those scientists who opposed our initial plan to create the time machine? They were behind the whole thing. They hired mercenaries and created and smuggled weapons and equipment, funded by none other than the money they carefully stole from our institution.”

Xeno’s neutral expression eventually broke. Veins popped from his temple, and the lines of ‘X’ on his forehead seemed to grow larger and darker along with his grim expression. “Those brainless apes. They so declare their opposition to the creation of the time machine, and yet once they saw how much progress we had achieved, they changed their minds and lusted to take credit for it.”

The scientist showed him a warped smile. “Well, too bad they lost the desire to do so anymore.”

Stanley didn’t let those words pass by his ears. The moment Xeno entered the room, he already took notice of it, but he just didn’t say anything.

Splatters of red painted the hem of his white coat. There were also some dried brown stains on his silver hair. The claws he usually wore were nowhere to be seen. Usually, Xeno took them off whenever he had to do something that required physical effort and less meticulous work. Whatever he did, however, Stanley need not ask him anymore.

Stanley knew. He could only offer silent condolences to the insolent fools who dared mess with them. Of course, their kingdom of science wouldn’t let the man kill anyone (they’re too soft for that). However, if asked who could think of using Why-man’s revival power to invent advanced torture methods beyond human imagination, it was without a doubt, only Xeno, as long as it was scientifically possible, of course.

The said scientist went back to his usual neutral expression. He continued, “Then, you might be wondering how I manage to reply to your message. That is, of course, due to the fact that I created another machine tha—”

Stanley frowned. There was a far too important thing they had to address.

“Xeno,” he called out with his dying throat.

The scientist flinched and then froze. He didn’t talk for a full minute. “What is it, Stan?” he asked with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“Drop that,” he replied.

“Whatever do you mean?”

“Ever since you entered this damn room, you’ve never looked at me directly in the eyes.”

“…”

“Xeno, look at me.”

Xeno’s smile dwindled. His lips seemed to tremble against his will, so when he saw Stanley looking at them, he automatically sealed them with his hand. He took a deep breath and looked at the cool lights on the ceiling.

For a moment, he didn’t know what else to do.

After a while, he began rubbing the area between his brows and, with a labored sigh, slowly lowered his head to meet Stanley’s intense, scrutinizing gaze.

Once the two locked eyes, everything crumbled. The scientist caught himself jumping into his arms, which they both knew were stretched out only for him.

Oh, what a wonderful feeling it was… to feel the initial need to calm yourself down before bursting into a mess you have so tried not to be. And what an honor to witness that kind of saccharine vulnerability, seeing it so closely that you could not even discern if it was even real.

Who cared if Xeno smelled like blood that used to cause him nightmares? The greatest nightmare of it all was not having the man in his arms.

Stanley’s body felt weak. He could barely get the energy to sit up, and now Xeno’s weight on his arms felt too much. He fell back on his back with Xeno on his chest and let a sharp cry that bordered between hurt and glee.

“You should’ve done this first, dumbass,” he expressed. “Who welcomes their lover back with a long-ass explanation of what did or did not happen? You yapped too much; you almost shattered my heart here and then.”

“Shut your mouth,” Xeno replied, sniffling. He lifted his face and wiped the little drops of tears he shed. He said, “Welcome back, Stan.”

Stanley couldn’t help but laugh at the words. It was here and now that he truly felt at home, so he verbalized it:

“I’m home, Xeno.”

Stanley once more tried to rise, “You know…” Xeno helped Stanley up as he also sat on the side of the bed.  Stanley continued, “I just realized what SX actually stands for…”

Xeno pretended to look at the side, a mannerism he always did whenever he was embarrassed, to hide his expression, although even without seeing it, Stanley knew how his lover looked. In a tone that ended up sounding like a mock, Xeno commented, “It only took you 5700+ years.”

“You’re so right, doc. It’s all thanks to you and your inability to be honest.”

Xeno gave him an offended look, a look that said, ‘You, of all people, are saying that to me?’ He said, “I don’t want to hear that from you, Stan. You’re incorrigible—I can’t believe you sent that. You tactless brute.”

Stanley smiled while soft giggles slipped past his lips. He chuckled uncontrollably. After calming himself down, he asked seriously, “So, what’s your reply?”

Xeno cleared his throat and looked at him with the softest gaze Stanley had ever seen him make. He stood from the bed and faced him properly. His flushed cheeks were obvious, but his expression, solemn.

“Okay,” Xeno simply said.

“Sweet,” Stanley replied giddily. “Let’s pick the rings tomorrow.”

“No,” Xeno firmly said. “I can just make them today, so we can hold the thing tomorrow.”

They both laughed.

They raised their hand in the air and pressed them together. After feeling the heat they emitted on each other’s palms, they intertwined their fingers and held each other tightly. Stanley craned his neck, and Xeno leaned in, connecting a kiss that lasted more than a millennium.

For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health…

To love and to cherish…

Till death do us part.

If Xeno asked him to see him in the past and future, he would. In fact, he already did once. He did send a message that saved and changed their lives forever—the message that he recalled telling Xeno that it was important to him:

Security breach: 05/19/57xx, approx. 16:10. Unknown armed unit enters via West Corridor. Evacuation protocol advised. Prioritize survival.

 

P.S.

 

Once I get back, let’s get married. -S