Chapter Text
Letters
Do you know what is going on.
B.
Bee,
We're going to have a wedding!
Dora
Are we not stopping them?
B.
Bee,
Don't even try.
I promise this is a good thing, there is nothing to worry about. You know me, I wouldn't stand for it if I thought it would end up blowing in their faces.
Dora
Aren't you going to do something.
B.
Barty,
I don't meddle. It's their business.
Evan
Liar. What about that girl Dorcas likes.
B.
Barty,
What about her? Why should I care.
Evan
If Dorcas likes girls and I know for sure Reg is into blokes...
B.
Barty,
Well, that's just not any of our business, is it?
Pandora says that she'll skin you alive if you try to intervene and that you need to stop sending out owls every five minutes, the poor thing looks famished.
I'd listen to her, personally, it might try to attack you.
Evan.
What the hell are you doing. Regulus? If you were desperate you only had to ask.
B.
Bartemius,
You came squealing to me when you kissed him in third year, don't even try it. Are you jealous, is that it?
Forever sorry to have stolen your dream husband,
Dorcas
We don't talk about that.
B.
Your future wife is the worst woman on earth and I think you could do better, if you really wanted to get married.
B.
Barty,
We're not doing that again, I'm not desperate enough to give you another chance.
Horrified and deeply offended that you even offered,
R.A.B.
I see my future and it's in Azkaban for murder. Do with that what you will.
B.
Bartemius,
You're cordially invited to keep your mouth shut and your summer free of other commitments. Regulus and I will be married in August and you'll be on your best behaviour.
Quit whining and start practicing,
D.M&R.A.B
Pandora,
Dorcas and I will be married in August, I trust you'll find a way to be there, despite your family's possible protests?
D.M&R.A.B.
P.S. Dorcas wants to inform you that she's winning. I strongly disagree with that statement.
Evan,
It's official we will see you and your sister in August. The announcement will be published soon but Reg says you might want to hint something so that they won't plan their trip to France around that time
D.M&R.A.B
Is it just me or is this sickening.
B.
Barty,
Terrifying, more like. They've merged into one, evil being that's twice as powerful as they were before. Now you really do need to stop meddling before they make you mysteriously disappear.
Evan
Evan,
I really think this is going to be a disaster.
B.
Barty,
It's going to be theirs, though, which is far better than the Black family's usual brand of disaster.
If it all ends up going for the worst, we'll still be there but at least let them try.
Evan