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Late 9:31 Dragon. Vigil's Keep, near Amaranthine.
A group of Grey Wardens have just returned from the latest of the newest series of unspeakable horrors - the slaughter of a trio of broodmothers whose death was likely a mercy to the women they once were, and several new insect-like darkspawn with human-like faces that someone had referred to as 'The Children'.
*It was too damned much for Ole Oghren.*
"I've followed the Warden-Commander all the way from the bowels of the lost Thaigs all the way to killin' a sodding archdemon, but those damn darkspawn bugs. Sakes alive, that stuff's driving me NOT to drink, heh."
Such a statement, had it been meant sincerely, would have been of great relief to both Seneschal Varen and to Mistress Woolsey, each of whom had a hand in the Keep's finances, and both of whom had seen the bill from the merchants for Oghren's alcohol supply. Emphasis on *Oghren's*. While other dwarves had occasionally joined him for a drink or two - and Warden Surana could hold her liquor better than most elves Oghren had heard of - most was drunk by one man.
Who, as he was swearing off drinking, still had ale in hand while talking to Nathaniel Howe - one of the Grey Wardens' newest recruits and, in Oghren's mind, the only member of the family worth a nug's arse.
Oghren had tried to hit on Nathaniel's sister, Delilah - nearly earning a blade to the throat before the Warden-Commander, seemingly the only woman on Thedas willing to put up with Oghren, stayed his hand. Nathaniel, as he seemed more and more willing to do, listened attentively to Surana and after a short growl had lowered his dagger.
Knowing he'd nearly set the man off only to now be sharing a drink with him had made Oghren almost feel like he was back in Orzammar. In the good times, before...
Oghren took another large drink as Nathaniel continued babbling on and on about darkspawn this and legacy that, and some druffalo dung about duty and honour. "Are they waterin' down the ale? Blast it, need to get onto Gabi about that. Heh, get onto...wait, dammit Oghren. Not her. Never her."
Despite his willingness to try to bed nearly every woman in Thedas, and even with the two occasionally joking loudly about it - usually over more ale or some of Gabi's special 'cider' (the surfacers had made alcohol from fruit from trees. Will the wonders never cease?!)...despite it all, Gabi was always Oghren's one and only line in the Stone when it came to hitting on women.
For one, Oghren reasoned, she was an elf who was only a hand taller than a dwarf. For another...
The turning feeling crept in Oghren's stomach again. How in all the Ancestors was she the only one who ever caused this to happen. This shit hurt to think about. But...she says it's important to do it.
"When all of Orzammar refused to believe me, about Branka. She listened. Hell,, she went halfway into the damned Deep Roads to find her. And when she was stark raving bonkers, she put her out of her misery. And when everyone else wanted Ol' Oghren cast out...she refused. She...shit, she called me a friend."
Oghren looked towards Nathaniel. There was something else. Oghren had hit on the Howe boy's sister, but..."I've seen the way he looks at her, at the Warden, at Gabi. Shit, he's good for her. Doesn't just take her mind off of Alistair and what happened with the Archdemon...them two, they're good for each other. Real good. I've...I've never had that."
Through Oghren's reluctant introspection and through the haze of the drink, Oghren caught something Nathaniel actually said.
"Look, I know you and I shall never be the best of friends, and should you ever hit on my sister again I WILL slit your throat, dwarf....but back there, in Kal-Hirol, your blade saved my Gabi's life several times over, and for whatever reason she seems fond of you. I am willing to put past...hostilities...aside if you are."
Only having heard the last few sentences of whatever Nathaniel had told him, he'd heard the last bit well enough. "Sure, sure pal. Any friend of the Warden-Commander's is a friend of mine. Besides that, I've seen you two around each other. Bet you two are planning your *own* expedition to the Deep Roads later on tonight, am I right?"
Oghren regretted the words as soon as he said it - and moments later had the chance to regret it from the floor as Nathaniel punched the dwarf square in the jaw.
"Do not speak of her in that way again, Oghren. She's your friend, hell, she might be your only friend in all the land. And she is the only person I have ever truly cared for. If you value your skin, do not talk of her in that manner in my sight ever again dwarf."
As Nathaniel stormed away red-faced and Oghren continued to lay on the floor of the Keep's main standing room and library, the twisting feeling came back once more. "He was offering a hand in friendship, you sodding arse, and you made sex jokes about him and your only blasted friend. What the hell is wrong with...with me?"
It had been too much for Felsi, too. "Especially once the Little Nugget showed up...huh...fitting I wound up on the floor too."
Felsi could put up with the insults - and give them right back. And the names.
But Oghren's drinking had led to their child dropped on the floor - nearly hurt, twice over. The second time had been the last straw...not just for her, but for Oghren himself. He'd stormed out, baby still crying, after shouting that his time with the Warden was the only good thing he'd ever done.
"Something's broken in me."
Oghren's time introspecting was cut short as the Warden-Commander stormed back into the keep. For an elven woman, the way that Warden-Commander Surana could storm imposingly into a room when mad would made even the most grizzled veterans of the Warrior Caste soil their armor.
"Say it to my fucking face, Oghren."
Oghren, still on the ground but now trying to pick himself up, asked her to repeat the question.
"Say to me what you just said to Nate."
"Ah, Nate is it. Knew you two were getting friendly, heh."
"What did you say about me and him to him."
"Look, Warden...Gabi...it wasn't anything personal. I was just joking about you and him 'exploring the Deep Roads', if you catch my drift."
The Wardens' fists unclenched. "Look, I can take banter and joking - Maker knows I'm the one that set you and Felsi back up - when it's just you and me. You know how Nathaniel is. Things are different now. And when you said that kind of stuff around Alistair...usually Morrigan was around to distract him with something else to be mad about."
"Gabi."
"What, Oghren?"
"Why do I do this shit? Your guy, he was literally trying to offer a hand of friendship to me. All I had to soddin do was say 'yes', and instead I made a joke about you two and got laid out for it. All I blastin' DO is push people away and then drink til I forget about it. Why?"
A look of concern showed up on her face. Oghren had managed to chain together the words "got" and "laid" together without so much as a snicker, this MUST be serious.
"Do you REALLY want to know, Oghren?"
"Gloves off, Warden. Warrior Caste, I can take it."
"You're the most insecure man I have ever met. You got put together with Branka even though you loved Felsi, so you took it out on everyone. But then she and your WHOLE HOUSE all abandoned you, so you freaked out. Orzammar didn't care enough about you to look for her, but she didn't care enough about you to stay. Oh, and once she was two thaigs away she started sleeping with another woman. THEN..."
The twisting feeling returned as Gabi continued to lay into Oghren's countless faults. If it had been anyone else, he'd have either spit in the face or gotten his axe - but this was the only reason he wasn't still drinking in that sodding Tavern in Orzammar wondering why no one was searching for Branka. The builder of every good thing he'd ever had in his life that he'd shat away.
"She's right. Great Stone-sense, for an elf. But...how in the dirt do I fix this...hmm, maybe listen, for one."
As he rejoined Warden Surana's lecture, she finished chastising him for chasing the groundskeeper, Samuel, around the Keep while wearing only his smallclothes. "Samuel was an elf in service of Rendon Howe, Oghren. That man's been through horrors untold and he was still distressed by you."
"And even after everything, he still cares about your new boyfriend like he's his own son."
"He...wait, what did you just say?"
"Samuel. Sorry about chasin' him. I remember getting a good sprint in but not any of that other stuff...but yeah. That ol' elf looks after Nathaniel like the fella bore him himself somehow. Get the feeling that your guy was probably the one human here - maybe his sister too - who was kind right back to him. Saw them two, Samuel and your fella, talking about you the other night. They were-"
"Please Oghren, don't."
"Nah, Gabi, this isn't my usual mess. Your guy was asking the old man about if there was anything he oughta know, about dating an elf. Cultural stuff, anything he should know that he wouldn't know being a sheltered rich human kid who wasn't raised to see y'all how he oughta but always tried to anyway. Said he wanted to 'get it right'. They got real quiet, when they saw me, but I knew they were trying to talk about important stuff so I just excused myself, high-tailed it on out of there."
For a moment, the Warden wore an expression of delight. That Nathaniel had cared enough about her to ask someone he clearly trusted and cherished as one of his only friends outside the ranks of the Wardens. About her. For her. To 'get it right'. Even Oghren could tell that it had affected her. Moments later though, her face bore new concern. A new question.
"Why did you leave Felsi?"
"You're changing the subject, Warden. Known ya too long to buy that. You're scared because the last guy you loved died fighting the soddin' archdemon, now we're here with all THESE horrors. And you love 'im, I can see it on your face. Did just now, too. Nathaniel, I mean. You loved Alistair too, don't get me wrong, but the only time I ever saw the look you and Nathaniel are givin' each other was one time, the way that Ol' King Aeducan gave HIS wife - Bhelen and them's ma."
"You're changing the subject too, Oghren. Why did you leave Felsi?"
"Because the little nugget deserves a better pops than me. I'm a drunk, even by dwarf standards, and I'm a shit parent. Couldn't even hold the little tyke without dropping him like a greased up nug. Felsi, the kid, they deserve better."
"So then be better, you sodding arse." Gabi lightly slugged Oghren in the shoulder, laughing as she flipped back the generally dwarven epithet back at him. "Don't just run away the second it gets scary."
"Usually if you call a warrior caste dwarf a coward you wind up the bad side of a blade for it...but you're right. Y'know, you're alright for an elf, but you never really figured out how to use 'sodding' right. Tell you what, tell your guy I'm actually sorry for once - and I'll prove it to him, too - and I'll tell ya how to REALLY get the words right."
"It's a deal. You're right, by the way. I do love him...Nathaniel. I wasn't sure my heart would ever be the same, after Alistair. Honestly, it's not the same. I wouldn've have bet, not in a million years, Oghren, that I'd fall in love with the son of Arl Rendon Howe, but he's not his father's son."
A voice came up from behind them. Nathaniel. "Thank the Maker for small mercies. For the record, Gabi, know I love you too. That said, Oghren - my father had about a thousand chances to do right by me, and he managed to bungle all but around three of them. Eventually he gave up entirely and put as many miles between me and him - so that he didn't have to even TRY to be better. It's part of how I wound up in the Free Marches. You say you want to improve? You want to show me what Gabi sees in you, dwarf? Tell your wife and your son you're sorry, and never stop trying to be better. If you keep trying to be a better father, then you'll have exceeded mine and that is how you shall earn my respect."
Oghren thought about it for a minute. He glanced at the cask behind them...and quietly, almost to himself, dismissed it. "You two...you're good together. Wish I could be a tenth the person either of you two are. All I can do is be a better Oghren, though. Sod it, might as well at least try. Want the little nugget to think his daddy's a great hero and someone who should be looked up to. And it's like I said, Felsi deserves better. Maybe I can't be it but I'm in her life no matter what, I should at least try to raise the old average, so to speak. Think I'll send her a message, if y'all will help. Wanna get this right."
Before Gabi could volunteer, it was Nathaniel who first offered. "I know fully well the pain and perils of a father absent in both presence and in heart. Change must come within you, but if you truly mean what you say about trying to be a better man for your son - perhaps I might yet come to see what my love sees in you as a friend."