Chapter Text
October, 10th,
Sometimes the grief is overwhelming. Some days it’s harder to stay in one piece, but no matter what I can feel the sting in the back of my throat.
I miss him, and it has never been harder to admit.
It has been 280 days since Yuuji died.
He didn’t die physically— no, that would have been preferred. He died when his purpose was torn away from him; when his grandfather’s life slipped through his fingers in one final wheeze. Now, nine months later, he sits listless. Like a spectator of his own body. No matter how much time has passed he can only turn the memory of warm skin slowly turning cold over in his head again and again.
His grandfather was a gruff man, all sharp edges and churlish attitudes. He didn’t like to talk much, but when he did he meant it. He prioritized Yuuji’s social and academic health above all else, often encouraging him to seek out friends and keep up in his studies. Even when he was in and out of the hospital he would still urge Yuuji to concern himself strictly with school — a habit that hurt his feelings more often than not — and not worry about an old man. That blasé outlook on himself used to comfort Yuuji, back when he was still young, but as he got older it got more and more distressing. The steadiness turned to discomfort. At the time, he didn’t have the words to describe how uncomfortable his grandfather’s disregard of his own life made him. So, Yuuji would lash out, screaming his lungs out with fierce determination that ultimately changed nothing. Frustration would boil under his skin, staining his cheeks a bright red and giving him a migraine. Tears slid down his cheeks but nothing changed.
Now, he lays here, shivering and sweating in his bed as the final moments of his grandfather’s life play over and over and over again. Inescapable images are burned into his eyelids. He raises his shaking hands to rub at his eyes. The nightmares have been getting more and more common as his first year of University descends upon him. Tired and weary eyes trail up to the ceiling of his shitty apartment, where the water stains are countless.
The cold of an early fall night creeps into his sheets, nipping at him. Yuuji blinks rapidly, trying to will away the images of weathered skin and near-visible bones from his memory. He has an early lecture tomorrow, meaning he needs to get sleep. He can’t afford to let his grades slip so early on in the semester. Try as he might, sleep evades him. The uncomfortable pillow beneath his head and blankets that itchy, which he can normally ignore, are unbearable tonight. Everything feels extra sensitive and overwhelming. The light sting of his eyes (which he will attribute to lack of sleep, despite everything saying otherwise) turns into a tossing and turning. Discomfort pricks at every point in his body, but he feels so restless.
After about 30 minutes of trying to find a comfortable position to sleep in he gives up. The clock on his nightstand reads a grim ‘ 3:30 AM’ . He’ll have to be up in less than 4 hours. Not ideal at all. Sluggishly, Yuuji pulls his heavy body up into a half sitting position. It feels like a thousand weights are attached to every part of his body. Nothing is left unscathed, but the restlessness trumps the exhaustion still desperately clinging to him and attempting to drag him to bed.
He makes his way to the small kitchen slowly, using the walls to guide his way instead of turning a light on (and nearly tripping on his backpack he forgot he left on the floor). Blindly, he feels around for his cabinets until he finds the one with the cups in it. If he hopes enough, maybe drinking some water might coerce him back to sleep. The TV he forgot to turn off before he went to bed plays softly in the background from its position in the middle of the living room. Early morning news if Yuuji had to guess.
His eyes ache again, a sting in the corners that isn’t ignorable. Watching the news was a ritual he had with Wasuke, something they would do every morning before he was permanently hospitalized. Yuuji’s shaking hands reach down to the cup of water, pushing it further up the counter as he battles a wave of grief that sticks in his throat.
Ever since… Wasuke’s passing, Yuuji has kept tight and hyper-specific rituals. Slowly, he phased out things that he used to do with his grandfather, telling himself that it was for the best. It felt like the hole inside of him got bigger every time he skipped something that was integral to him, but it kept him safe . The likelihood of breaking out in tears lessened if—
‘Breaking news!
We interrupt your morning with an update on the search for a missing hiker. Authorities received a call from family members of twenty-seven year old ‘Matthew Scott’, after he failed to return to his apartment on Monday morning.’
The reporter’s urgent voice tore Yuuji out of the spiral he was locked in. Hastily he wiped his eyes and swallowed the pressure that built up in his throat while making his way to the TV. In a way, he was grateful for the distraction even as his fingers swiped around for the power button. That died quickly once he noticed the headlines.
“ FIVE FOUND DEAD — LINKED TO UPTICK IN BODIES FOUND IN REGION”
What the fuck is that supposed to mean??
With his attention thoroughly diverted, he looked to the TV with rapt attention. There had always been a presence of missing hikers near the mountains — hell, half his childhood was filled with urban legends and stern warnings to never go out in the woods alone — but this increase was ridiculous. In September alone there were two new bodies from counties a couple miles out found on the trails.
‘ —The search was concluded Friday afternoon when a tourist stumbled across a ravaged torso, which was later identified as Mr. Scott. The rest of the body has not been recovered. It was found about 50 miles away from the last known sighting of Mr. Scott. Leading theories include an animal attack, although no official statement has been released by the coroner’s office.
This marks the fifth body fou—”
Shock rocks through Yuuji’s body. Wildlife has always been a very real concern, but something about this feels stranger than the previous years. Malicious even, since without fail each body was ripped to absolute shreds, and few identifying features were left intact. One unfortunate woman was found ripped in two, with her top half hanging out of a tree and the other part a gory mess in the bushes.
The news transitions to a more menial topic. The whiplash reminds him why he was sitting in front of the TV in the first place. A quick tap of his fingers cuts the newswoman off and turns the screen dark. On trembling legs he stumbles blindly back to his small room, tripping over himself in his increased exhaustion. Sleep does not claim him, but unease does.
***
“—uuji”
“Wa…up!....uji!”
“Yuuji! Wake the fuck up!”
A hand grasps his shoulder and shakes him violently out of his restless slumber. Panicked, he looks around before his momentary fear turns to weariness. Standing in front of his desk is Kugisaki, with a manicured hand placed firmly on her hip. Annoyance warps her face as she stares him down with little patience.
“Dumbass,” she enunciates with a flick of her fingers against his forehead, “you’re fuckin’ lucky I covered for your ass. You know how Prof gets.”
Yuuji’s face involuntarily scrunches up at the insane rules set by Professor Getou. Other poor souls stuck in his class call him a hellspawn for a reason.
“Thank you. I’d rather not deal with that mess today.”
She snorts and grabs her bag from the seat next to him, slinging it over her shoulder while looking back expectantly at him. A groan leaves his lips as he heaves himself up. The exhaustion from last night is bone-deep now, weighing down on everything. A steadying hand is planted on the desk while he carefully moves his textbooks and laptop into his old messenger bag. His sluggishness must be apparent because Nobara’s perpetually irritated face loosens up and a soft concern peeks through.
She reaches a hand out on his arm to keep him upright, asking quietly, “Are you okay?”
The bottom of his lip quivers, as unknown emotions surge in his chest before he locks it down. Something on his face must have shown though, because she only looks more worried. She stares at him for a moment before dragging him out of the classroom and down the hall to the cafeteria. Whispering under her breath, she keeps charging forward. It’s only when they finally stop that he can get a half-hearted defense out.
“I’m fine ‘Bara, I just didn’t sleep well last night and it’s been a while since I’ve had some free time.”
Nobara doesn’t look convinced, but the relief Yuuji feels when she lets the topic go, instead of pushing as she usually does, is tremendous. Once she has something in her sights, it’s rare for her to let it go without a fight.
The chatter of the other students is soothing to his tense mind, keeping him sane while Nobara looks at him scrutinizingly.
“Okay, I’ll take your word for it, but we are hanging out next week. This isn’t up for discussion,” she demands, finally letting go of him.
“Uhm… so, about that—,” he starts.
“You’re not being for real,”
“ — I’m actually sorta, house sitting for someone next week,” he finishes, ignoring her interruption and cringing from the blankness of her expression.
“Who? Where? Why are you just now telling me this?”
Yuuji knows it was better to just confess, but she wasn't going to be pleased. They have been friends since middle school, and she witnessed the downward spiral Wasuke left him in.
“Family friend. I don’t know him super well but he knew my–, my grandfather and reached out to me. Something, something I was a last option. It’s up… in the mountains,” he trails off, watching her face like a hawk. Although unlikely, he hopes it’s just enough information to satisfy.
“Up in the mountains? Elaborate.” Unamused. Okay definitely not off to a great start.
Fuck.
“About an hour or two away from here, heading… south,”
“In murder country! Are you suicidal? ” she hisses, face contorted into an unpleasant expression. Not as pissed as he was predicting but definitely not good. He sits down at one of the nearby tables, with Nobara hot on his heels. His bag gets placed down at his feet as he leans closer to her.
“No!! Well– I mean technically it is ‘murder’ country, but I'll be okay. Plus, it’s just 5 days up there watching a house. There’s a fence and everything. You know I can handle myself just fine.”
A solid defense, or at least he likes to delude himself that it is.
“That doesn't solve shit! If a murderer wants to get you, you’re a prime target,” she says behind clenched teeth.
He considers it, wanting to say “who cares if someone kills me” but that is quite possibly the worst response he is capable of forming.
“I’m intimidating as fuck, and I wont be defenseless either! Also– it’s been confirmed an animal attack, you act like there’s a serial killer running around in the hills.”
Another deadpan stare.
“Do you hear yourself?” she asks, with a complete and utterly baffled tone.
“Yeah, you’re right, my bad,” he concedes instantly. To be fair, few people thought the number of missing people was entirely due to wild animals.
She glares at him while muttering under her breath. Her light brown hair is pulled behind her face today, showing off her ear piercings.
“Whatever, we’re hanging out this weekend and you’re calling me everyday you’re up there. If you do something stupid I will personally kill you myself.”
Evidently done with this conversation, she gets up and heads to get lunch. A smile creeps up his face while he watches her leave. Despite her flippantness, he knows that she genuinely cares for him. It’s something that makes his chest feel warm.
Once she returns with food in hand, Yuuji makes a move to get up but is stopped.
“Nuh uh, you sit back down,” she says, not focused on him as she carefully navigates two trays down onto the table, “I know you. If I left you to your own devices you’d probably not eat or something, so I made the decision for you.”
Her matter-of-factness annoys him, but guilt replaces that feeling quickly. He’s been trying to keep his issues under tight control but it seems he failed at that. Just another thing he’s screwed up.
Awkwardly, he slides the offered tray closer to him, flicking his eyes away while thanking Nobara. Under her watchful eye, he picks at the sandwich under his fingertips. He doesn’t have an appetite, but he can’t remember the last time he ate something.
Conversation from that point on flows smoothly, going from topic to topic. At one point they are quite fiercely debating who is the hottest U.S president. The absurdity is something he can hardly take seriously but he doubles down at every turn. He’s in the middle of a passionate spiel about why JFK was not the hottest when Nobara suddenly stops paying attention to him.
Her eyes have drifted over his shoulder and behind him. Despite her relaxed posture, with her hand cradling her head, she has an alertness to her that is unusual. Concern washes over him, and he straightens up.
“...Are you… okay?” he asks, trailing off mid sentence.
Almost as if she was in a trance, her eyes snap back to him suddenly. Something akin to unease lingers in them.
“Yeah, I’m okay,” she affirms, tapping her painted nails against the table slowly. “I guess I just got distracted.”
Quickly, he looks over his shoulder, but nothing stands out to him. Students rush in and out of classes, some even stopping and sitting down at benches. Nothing auditory stands out either, the only thing he can hear is the rumble of people.
“Who were you looking at?” Subtlety was never his forte, but he has enough tact to lower his voice.
She raises a brow, “Who said I was looking at anyone?”
He doesn’t verbally respond, instead rolling his eyes at her attempted deflection and plopping his head on the table. He never likes to push his friends on things, not unless it’s serious.
“Keep your secrets then,” Yuuji sniffs, eyeing her from where he's laying his head against the table.
“Awww, don’t be like that buttercup.” A grin tugs at the side of her lips, playfulness infecting her expression before it drops again. He furrows his eyebrows, lifting his head and once again looking around. Still nothing out of the ordinary. Opening his mouth he makes the move to say something but is cut off again.
“I… uhm. Do you know that Fushiguro guy? The one in our calc 2 class?”
Fushiguro….? Quickly he digs through his memory, trying to match the name with a face. It takes him a moment but the image of dark hair and an indifferent look comes to mind. It’s fuzzy to him. The man is rarely in class, and is even harder to spot outside of it.
The nervousness radiating off of Nobara is unusual though, he’s never seen her not confident. A million scenarios run through his head, but he ignores them and focuses on answering her.
“Sorta? Is everything fine? Did he do something weird?”
“No! Nothing like that, he just… really creeps me out. Like, everytime he walks into a room I feel like I can’t have my back to him,” she says in a hushed tone.
It wasn’t as bad as he was thinking, but still troubling. He’s never noticed something like that, but oftentimes he’s not fully aware of things happening.
“Actually, he’s allegedly chill. The people who have had him for group projects say he’s neutral and does his part. It’s more just his vibe . I feel so uncomfortable, and I’m not the only one,” she finishes, her gaze alternating between him and over his shoulder.
“Not the only one?” he questions, unsure what to ask about first.
“Yeah. He’s a second year, or something like that. He actually lives up in those spooky old mountains, and has always lived up there— but he’s just weird. Even his mannerisms are strange. No one knows anything about him, and he was never— ” she cuts herself off, huffing and still tapping her fingers against the table, but now it’s more frantic. “....How do you not know this?”
“Bara’ I’m from the mountains too. I didn’t play with the other kids either.”
“But you aren’t like him. Plus you went to the local high school at least,” she emphasizes. Discomfort rolls in his stomach, while he momentarily tunes out what she was saying. The words feel oddly exclusionary, but he knows that isn’t Nobara’s intention.
“ —Anyway, he just rubs me the wrong way. Like when you talk to him he just stares you down and—”
“Wait, have you talked to him before?” he interjects, accidentally cutting her off.
She pulls back, and mumbling a ‘yes’ so quietly he has to strain to hear it over the chatter of the cafeteria.
“What? When?”
She looks back over his shoulder, fixating on Fushiguro and lowering her voice even more. It’s near impossible to hear what she has to say now.
“I was walking late at night near campus like 3 weeks ago —don't ask why it’s not important— and I saw him walking out of the fucking woods like a crazy person. I figured he was just, like, enjoying the scenery or something, but I was still weary. Somehow he saw me and just fucking stared. It was creepy but the look in his eyes was worse . It was half-feral or something.”
Half-feral…? Nobara can be dramatic, but the way she keeps checking, almost as if she's afraid of him overhearing is out of character. There’s a nervousness present that sets Yuuji on edge too.
“...That is really strange actually.”
His thoughts race. He never really thinks about his classmates, as messed up as that sounded. He’s just floating through life as best as he can. Intrigue tugs at him however, the description making him want to know what Fushiguro was doing that night. His memories are fuzzy, and it’s hard to determine if he’s ever heard other stuff floating around about him or if Nobara was sitting on this for a while. Cautiously he looks over his shoulder, checking to see if Fushiguro was still there. Sure enough, the other man stands there staring at his phone. The cafeteria is a lot quieter, and there’s some kids trying (and failing) to stare discreetly. A pang of sympathy echoes in his heart. It’s not like Fushiguro asked to be stared at like he was some zoo animal. Especially by the entire school population.
Abruptly, Fushiguro’s eyes lock onto Yuuji’s, breaking him out of his blatant, and unintentional gawking. The look in them is blank, just like the rest of his expression. They have a stare down for a few moments before he looks away and walks out of the building, leaving Yuuji to gaze at the place he once stood at. It felt like he was being tested and judged, and he’s not sure he passed.
A strange man indeed.
***
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS PERSON?
MISSING PERSON
Name: Julia Moore
Age: 21
Sex: Female
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Blonde
Height: 5’2
Weight: 110 lbs
LAST SEEN: SEPT. 30TH, WEARING BLUE JEANS, RED JACKET, LARGE WIDE-BRIMMED HAT, AND HIKING BOOTS. HEADING TOWARD PEAKS TRAIL.
IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION PLEASE CONTACT: +1 (XXX)-XXX-XXXX
***
October, 24th,
The feeling of hopelessness gets worse every day I remain alive. I wake up, wondering what the point of it all is. I just want my friends to stay safe, but that feels like a further away goal with every body found.
Something is out in those woods. I don’t know what, but I hope I never find out.
The rest of the week goes by relatively uneventfully and before he knows it, it’s the Friday before his house-sitting week.
Yuuji hasn’t seen Fushiguro since. A part of him wants to seek him out, to find him again, but he ignores it.
The routine he’s been stuck in continues, nothing changes.
Nothing changes.
Fridays are the days he has no overlapping classes with any friends. It’s a mixed experience, sometimes the loneliness is crushing, and other times it's manageable. Today is manageable. A vague sense of anticipation flows through him, making him more distracted during the time he is supposed to be focusing. The homework he’s supposed to be doing after class has been lying, half blank and neglected while he stares out the window of the library. Music plays softly through headphones while it storms outside.
The rain pitters and patters, hardly audible but its presence is still comforting in a way. It’s just distracting enough that he doesn’t have to be left with his thoughts. His phone chimes from where it is face down on the table, bringing his scattered attention back to the task he’s supposed to be doing. He debates on not answering, but ultimately checks it.
JUNPEI
Can't make it. I'm visiting my mom over the weekend. Maybe next time?
Disappointment swells but he pushes it back down. It feels like they have grown apart in the recent months, and it worries him. He managed to convince himself for a while that it was all in his head but the anxiety is reaching a boiling point. They have been friends since high school, and the idea of losing someone that close makes him fidget in his seat.
ME
Okay ! Drop it in the gc so we can plan another time :)
Yuuji flips his phone back over, feeling rejection surge through him. Deep down he doesn’t want to see Junpei’s reaction, or lack thereof. He makes a mental note to block out some time to visit Junpei’s mother with him. They used to be super close, and the Yoshino’s kept him sane in those first couple of weeks after his grandpa died. Something must be wrong, if Junpei has been so apathetic recently. His legs involuntarily bounces while he gets lost in his worry.
SLAM!!
A sudden noise jolts him out of his thoughts violently. He whips his head to the source, but finds absolutely nothing out of the ordinary. Just a book that seemingly has fallen off of a shelf. It’s a little odd but he brushes it off. Without hesitation, he gets up from the chair he has been perched on for the last three hours. The vertebrae in his spine pops when he arches his back to stretch. The feeling of popping joints makes him sigh, since he often forgets to take breaks when working (not that he was working much today). Leisurely, he makes his way to the aisle and bends down to retrieve the fallen book. It’s a… neurobiology textbook of some sort? He isn’t sure, but it definitely isn't supposed to be in this section.
“Excuse me,” a smooth, deep voice calls from behind him.
Jumping, he turns around, clutching the book tightly in his hands. Fushiguro stands there, a polite distance away and looking bored with the interaction already. A shiver unwillingly runs down his spine. Now that it has been pointed out to him, Fushiguro does have a strange vibe…
“Are you using that book? If you’re not, I would like to have it,” he says, never shifting his voice from monotone. Sharp green eyes stare at him with palpable disinterest
The lack of inflection in his voice is stark, and very peculiar. The hair partially covering his eyes makes it harder to discern his mood or guess what he was looking at.
Yuuji glances down at the book in his possession. Was Fushiguro studying neurobiology? Interesting.
“Uhm, yeah man. It’s all yours,” he says, handing the book off to the other man. The distance between them is weird, just being a little too far to be having a conversation. He has to lean forward slightly to even hand it to him! Awkwardness washes over Yuuji when their fingers brush against each other momentarily.
Still looking unamused, Fushiguro nods and quietly tells him “thank you” before turning on his heel and walking off, disappearing amongst the rows and rows of shelves.
Unease settles around him, adding to the dreary weather outside. Nothing about that interaction was particularly peculiar, but it left him feeling anxious. Everything about that man is shrouded in mystery it seems. All of his staring has rewarded him with something though, considering he noticed a small scar on the right of Fushiguro’s lip. It was etched into the skin cleanly, but jagged in pattern.
Slowly, he makes his way back to the table he was sitting at, but with a bit more caution in his steps. It seems silly but it feels like there is something else that was meant to happen. He looks out the window, suddenly aware of just how hard it is storming outside.
The rain is unrelenting.
***
“So, you’re telling me that you talked to him? ” Nobara asks, whipping her head up and away from the nail polish she was carefully applying to his nails, “And you’re still alive?”
Yuuji rolls his eyes, gently slapping her arm at her theatrics, “Yeah, last time I checked he didn’t kill me.”
She caps the bottle, finished with both his hands. The color this time was a deep purple, so dark it was nearly black. They had been yapping together as part of their sleepover ritual, when the topic had shifted to the topic of weird classmates. One thing led to another and he (intentionally) brought up Fushiguro. He considers what to say next as he admires the glossy shine of fresh nail polish.
“Actually, I will say, you were right–”
“I'm always right,” she interrupts without a beat.
She’s still fiddling with the bottles and arranging them in a neat circle on her desk. Her room is clean and tidy. Pretty, frilled curtains hung up, matching the light blue of her walls. A mountain of stuffed animals is piled on her bed, which is slowly consuming him in their mass. The one time he asked to move them out of their careful arrangement he got pencils chucked at him. His bags for tomorrow are sitting inconspicuously in the corner, after Nobara cajoled him into staying until he had to leave.
“– about the weird feeling he puts off. Fusiguro, I mean,” he continues, clarifying who he was speaking about.
She freezes momentarily, looking up at him from where she was diligently doing her task. There’s a look on her face, one he can’t place. She twists the corners of her mouth in contemplation, almost as if she has something more to say, but just hums.
“Yeah.”
The conversation fades off from there, like it was suffocated out of the room. They each go about separate tasks, while ignoring the elephant in the room until it fades away. Later, when they are both curled up on Nobara’s bed, Yuuji tries (and fails) to beat a video game. The ‘YOU ARE DEAD’ screen pops up once again, marking his 10th consecutive try. Idly, he picks at his pants while he waits to respawn.
“Y’know, you suck ass at this game,” Nobara pipes up from where she is laying on his shoulder. Her phone drops from her hands, while she blows air on the side of his face, “...Junpei is better.”
The reminder is a sore one. Yuuji still feels the disappointment curling around him from Junpei’s earlier dismissal. Deep inside him he fears that it’s because Junpei doesn’t want to see him .
“...Yeah he is, isn’t he?” he mumbles around a mouth full of ash. Bitterness is surely clinging to his tone, he wasn’t fast enough to catch it.
They sit in silence for a moment, each wrapped up in their own worlds. The still quietness is only broken when Nobara utters, “I’m sorry.”
He snorts, “It’s not your fault, why are you apologizing?”
“Cause I know he means a lot to you, and whatever is going on sucks. Even though I started being friends with him soon after you, I don’t think we ever formed that deep bond you had .”
Silence descends on them once more. It’s never unbearably awkward — no, they’ve known each other too long for that. But a lot of weight is wrapped up in those few moments. There’s the care that Yuuji feels so starved of. Sitting right in reach at the cost of his tears. The tears that refuse to drop, because somewhere along the way he lost that vulnerability.
“Hey, do you wanna watch that new movie? The one that came out last month?” he says around a mouthful of something that tastes like betrayal.
Movies were a thing he and Junpei did almost exclusively. If he hopes enough, maybe they can both pretend like it’s a piss-poor attempt at a deflection and not as heavy as it truly is. He knows Nobara isn’t stupid, she knows.
Her eyes force contact with him.
“...We can watch a movie, but not that one. You need to get a better taste in movies,” she sniffs at him, not breaking eye-contact until he does.
Ah. A compromise. As frustrating as the thought is, he understands why she did that. He’s never made a good decision while upset, and it's doubtful he would start now. Sitting on it would be a good idea.
“Human Earthworm isn’t a bad movie! Watch yourself with the slander, ma’am,” he grouses, injecting as much offense as he can into his tone.
“How’d you know I was talking about that godforsaken franchise? Hmm?” she raises one eyebrow, staring at him out of the corner of her eyes.
“Cause you’re a mean, terrible, no-good friend who doesn’t support my hobbies”
She grabs the remote, having powered down the gaming console while he was thinking of a retort worthy enough. She flicks through a few buttons before handing the remote to Yuuji.
“Uh huh, whatever you say.”
***
MISSING PERSON(S)
2 WOMEN HAVE BEEN REPORTED MISSING. LATE LAST SATURDAY THEIR CAMP WAS FOUND INTACT. WHEREABOUTS UNKNOWN. $10,000 REWARD
- 21 YR. BRWN HAIR, BRWN EYES. 110 LBS
- 19 YR BLK HAIR, GRN EYES. ~120 LBS
CONTACT THE LOCAL SHERIFF IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION . CALL 911 IF YOU SEE THEM.
***
This morning is a cold one; the chill of late fall is unrelenting in its bite.
Yuuji’s coffee is sitting in the cupholder, cold, neglected after the first few sips. Under normal circumstances, it would have been consumed quickly, but today he feels off.
Perhaps it’s lingering emotions from last night, or something new.
Tall trees rush past as he speeds down the highway. Occasionally he manages to glimpse the sprawling mountains over the dense forest that surrounds him. Despite his relative proximity to the mountains, he's still got a two hour drive till he reaches the house. Truthfully, he wouldn’t be taking Haruto up on this offer if it wasn’t for the money. Not because he was cold-hearted —no, it was the opposite— it was because the wound was still too fresh. He doesn’t want to see the sympathetic gazes, or the pitiful looks. All of it made him so uncomfortable but he knew better than to ever voice that. He didn’t want pity . He just wanted people to keep going on like it never happened (because that would be better than facing what he’d lost).
His restless fingers tap against the steering wheel, as his thoughts start to race. His grandpa wasn’t a friendly man, to the point of outright avoiding others. Yuuji didn’t go to in-person school until Wasuke was too sick to justify staying out of town, and some of that avoidance definitely rubbed off onto him. Somehow though, Haruto and his wife managed to stick around and were frequent visitors in his young childhood home. At some point, the visits stopped, but he never figured out why. They only resurfaced at his grandpa’s funeral, when they wished him condolences and let him mourn in peace. A wave of despair hits him suddenly, coming on so quick he didn’t have time to brace for it.
Ohmygodhe’sreallygone–
He takes a deep breath to banish the thoughts; tightening his hold on his steering wheel. It would do no good to get distracted while driving. He should save that for later, when it was safe to let himself drown in the misery he’s been hiding.
Autopilot kicks in as he navigates through tight rock slopes. He’s never been this way before, but it’s easy enough to drive down a highway with no sharp turns. Every couple of miles there is a break in the trees, where he can see gorgeous meadows and clearings. Signs are posted up around the edges of the road, warning of rockfalls and deer crossing. The steady hum of the engine keeps him grounded, even if the larger and larger rock walls on the sides of him start to make him claustrophobic. The sights and cool mountain air makes him miss the old house they used to live in, before they moved into the town. No matter how far he ran, it seemed like his grandpa's property would never end. There was never a shortage of places for him to explore.
A million intrusive scenarios play behind his eyes. The rocks slamming down onto his car, a deer jumping across the road and killing them both, a negligent driver veering into his side of the road and forcing his car to tumble down the cliffside.
All of it should have been terrifying, but none of it was.
Discomfort pricked up his neck, dispelling the foggy calm that descended over him. He didn’t even notice the moment the thoughts started sounding appealing until he was already thinking ‘ that wouldn’t be so bad.’
Maybe Nobara was right, it was getting worse.
For the next two hours, until he sees the off-ramp, he is hypervigilant over his own thoughts, filtering all of them to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. God, he is such a fucking mess, and he can’t see an end in sight. His hands tighten against the wheel, while he tries to collect himself a bit.
By the time the turn-off for the house comes into sight, his coffee is too far gone to salvage. It’s watered down beyond belief, and room temperature. Mentally noting to throw it away, he keeps going. Eventually he turns down the road that leads to a long, winding driveway. Lush greenery surrounds the paved road, with huge oak tree branches reaching across its width. Once the house comes into view, Yuuji curses. The house is fucking big. It’s set on a small hill, and sprawls down the sides. The roof is mostly flat, but slanted up and down. Big windows are placed on the front, but the sun’s glare is preventing him from seeing inside.
His precise memory of Haruto is shaky at best, most of it fading into the background of the warm muddled memories of childhood, but damn , he sure didn’t remember a house of that size. It makes him wonder what even drew Haruto to his grandpa. The house he grew up in was modest, with exactly two rooms. They were nowhere near rich, and most of the charm came from the things they chose to decorate with. Knick-knacks and other trinkets they made or bought on their rare excursions to town.
That familiar discomfort comes back; he doesn’t want to talk to Haruto at all. Yuuji has absolutely nothing against the man, in fact it was a grounding to know someone from his childhood was still around, but it didn't make it any easier. Mercifully, he won't have to talk to him. The instructions and keys were left for him, and he had another list saved in his text logs with Haruto. Apparently he isn’t that worried about someone breaking in.
Once Yuuji pulls up, he takes the keys out of the ignition and grabs his phone from where it's laying on the passenger’s seat. A few notifications pop up while he disconnects the aux cord and stops the music. They are mainly from Nobara, checking to see if he made it safely, and one from Haruto, who was once again thanking him. He types up a response hastily and steps out of the car to walk up the stairs.
The rickety wooden steps creak under his weight but he pays them no mind. Instead he hunts for the plant pot that the keys are tucked away in. The porch is roomy, with a rocking chair placed in the corner and a bench facing outward. After some rustling, he fishes the keys out and unlocks the heavy red wooden door. With a slight push it opens and reveals a very spacious foyer. It’s decorated nicely, with some flairs of opulence.
Three large dogs swarm him, whining and brushing up against him. One was white with long fur, another was black with equally long hair, and the last was a sort of speckled black and white short-hair. Akito, Darling, and Chiriko. He manages to remember their names off the top of his head.
“Hi buddies, what’s up?” he asks, letting them get acclimated to his scent and demeanor.
They sniff at his fingers while he takes in the rest of the house. There is no upstairs, and the foyer opens to a decent living room and a hallway that leads to the bedrooms and study. He was told that he would be staying in a guest room —which he guessed was somewhere down said hallway— and that he was free to set up in it. He only brought two bags, both of which could sling over his shoulders in one trip. It was a good thing he had decent muscle, or else the sheer weight would be overwhelming.
They lose interest quickly, which should be more concerning than it is. It’s good for him since they didn’t attack him, but now he worries that they would be a little too friendly to prospective burglars. All three of them watch him from their spots on the couch, as he walks down the hallway to look for his room. He tries a few doors, only to realize that they’re locked. The one that isn’t is his room. There is a small piece of paper on his nightstand with the WI-FI password on it. He scans the room and finds it mostly bare, with a bed and some blankets on it shoved up against a wall. A wall-to-wall shelf full of books sits flush against the other side.
There is something so uncomfortable about being in someone else’s space, especially if it’s someone you don’t know well at all.
Once he sets his bags down into his temporary room, he’s left to the silence of the big house. It’s nerve wracking but also comforting in a way. He’s used to silence, after all, he lives in an apartment by himself and has had visitors exactly once (when Nobara brought over “ housewarming” gifts even though the apartment was absolute shit). The unsettling part came from how much space there was. Unlike his apartment, the amount of openness meant a lot more potential hiding places. That familiar loneliness flairs up, and he’s already longing for the comfort of someone's presence. Anyone. The dogs were helpful, but they wouldn’t be able to replace human contact for him.
Yuuji walks into the living room, where a neat checklist is taped to a wall. There’s not a lot of upkeep that’s required; most of it consisted of keeping plants watered, making sure it looked like someone was home for a week, and taking care of the dogs. Easy shit.
Every morning he would need to go out in the backyard, which was fairly well maintained — to the point Yuuji wondered if there was a gardener — and check up on the small flower garden. After that he needs to feed and walk the dogs. There are a few more basic upkeep tasks, but a large majority of his day is going to be completely free. Normally he would have classes, and his part-time job to fill the space, but his job is closed for the month for renovations on its building (meaning he’s been out of work for a while). All he has now is the pre-assigned homework. He won’t be driving back down for his classes, since none of them require in-person attendance (and the one that did got cancelled), because his car is a piece of shit that probably shouldn’t be driven for everyone's general safety.
He goes outside first, intending on checking on the plants that would be in his care. Even though he’s never put that much thought into flowers and gardens, it looks truly beautiful. Small little butterflies bounce around from flower to flower, while the noon sun makes everything vibrant. There’s a big old tree that covers a decent portion of the yard in shadow, and an elaborate bird bath under it. A sun-bleached sign is posted on a gate connected to the fence. Curiously, he walks over and checks it out.
‘Trail Entrance’
Interesting. This is probably where he’s supposed to walk the dogs. It’s not like the house is located in a small suburban neighborhood, so he can’t just walk them down the street. For a brief moment, Nobara’s voice rings in his ears; reminding him that it probably isn’t safe, but no new bodies have been recovered in some time, and he wouldn’t wander that far. He could bring some sort of bear mace with him as well. It’s still roughly two hours off from where the first bodies were discovered too.
After some time, he's thoroughly inspected every bit of the backyard, and he turns around and walks back into the house. But he can’t shake the unsettling feeling that tingles up the nape of his neck, like someone is watching him from those shadowy trees.
When he looks back nothing is there.
***
Oct, 28th,
It feels weird here. I don’t know why. The day I got here I felt uneasy, but today is even worse. It’s like I was being watched all day. I might’ve been hallucinating but I feel like even the dogs were on edge.
It’s only been a single day since he’s arrived and he wants out. Akito and Darling were currently outside rolling in the grass while Chiriko was laying on the rug in the living room. For the last hour or so he’s been sitting in the living room and doing some assignments. Nobara’s been spam texting him all evening, ranging from making sure he was okay and absolutely bombarding him with the newest drama. Apparently, a well known and huge friend group imploded on itself because the members were all talking shit about each other.
He keeps checking his and Junpei’s chat, but the only thing that greets him is his last message to him. Yuuji taps his fingers against the table, drawing the attention of Chiriko but he ignores it. There is bitterness that lingers in his mind as he stares down at his phone. Normally they would be chatting a lot more, but it’s been so quiet on Junpei’s end. The only time he gets a response is when he reaches out first, and only after a day or two has passed. Hell, even tracking down Junpei is getting harder. It’s near impossible to find him outside of class.
It’s frustrating as all hell.
A pitiful whine knocks him out of his thoughts, bringing him back to attention when the heavy paw of Chiriko lays on his leg. He whines and walks over to the sliding glass door, plopping down on his haunches and staring at him. The pleading stare he is given has him getting up and opening the door. He stares outside for a moment, taking in the giant trees that border the backyard before deciding to go outside again.
It’s just about twilight now, and the sunlight is just about gone. He can barely see from the light being blocked by the trees, but the gate still draws his attention. The light from his phone is just enough to light his path as he stumbles his way down to the gate. He thinks about it for a little bit, but ultimately decides it will be fine to walk down the tail. He can take the dogs down the path with him and carry some bear spray. He even texted Haruto and got the ‘okay’ for it, if he could get it open. All three of the dogs follow him as he gets closer and closer, yipping and wagging their tails. The gate itself is sturdy, and after a little tugging, it wedges free from the ground. There’s a bit of creaking and cracking once it swings open but he decides to ignore that. It probably won’t shatter into a million pieces. Hopefully.
.
..
…
….
The next day is uneventful for the most part, lots of the same repetitive actions that he’s been numbly performing for the past few days.
Just two more days and he’ll be back at his home, even if it’s lonely.
Yuuji gets up from his chair he was sitting in while he waited for the dogs to finish eating. Darling comes over and sniffs at his hands in hope of a second dinner, but leaves him alone quickly when she can’t smell anything.
“Aw, don’t be upset Darling,” he says, walking over to the front door and grabbing all of their leashes, “I’m sure a long walk will fix it.”
That gets them excited, all of them charging him and even slobbering on his jeans in their sheer happiness. One by one he leashes them up and double checks he has waste bags. Darling wastes no time, and takes charge in pulling him down a small hill to the gate. She sits impatiently and whines at him while the two others sniff at some nearby flower beds.
Once it’s opened, it’s like a race started. They all pull at their leashes and investigate any little thing they come across. It was endearing to see them super excited but his hands ache from the way the leashes are wrapped around them. The more they pull, the tighter it gets. It gets to a point where he starts to jog alongside them as they tear through the dusty trail.
A few trail information plaques pass by them, signifying that they joined the official path— and that they were no longer on the little trail leading to the house. He can’t figure out specifically which one this is, but he stops to look at all of the info plaques. A few are about the different fauna (specifically deer and birds) and others about common flora found in the area.
The gentle breeze shakes through the leaves of the trees, making a pleasant crashing sound he can’t help but relax to. Oh how he missed the fresh mountain air.
He’s in the middle of wrangling Akito and attempting to read another sign when the hairs on the back of his neck raise. It’s a disgusting feeling that only intensifies when he looks around. No matter how long he stares in a direction, he can’t pinpoint a specific reason to why he feels scared. His heart speeds up, and he looks to the dogs. They’re sniffing at a dirt pile and completely at ease. It douses the panic that was building quickly, because if they aren’t freaking out then he shouldn’t either. Still, he decides to cut the walk short and go back home. It’s getting super dark anyway and he forgot to bring his high-power flashlight.
The feeling of being watched never leaves him though, even as he locks up the backdoor.
***
“Yeah, nah, that’s an absolutely wild thing to see first thing in the morning,” Yuuji says, listening with rapt interest at the absolutely insane story Nobara is regaling him with.
“I know! Like, I get being tipsy but going skinny dipping in the pool is unhinged. It wasn’t even a private pool, it was the community one,” she grouses, her voice a high pitch warped from the speakers of his phone.
He had gotten (a little) paranoid after that walk, and it doesn’t help that he can’t get rid of the idea that something is watching him. It’s a bit silly, now that he’s calmed down and talked it out with Nobara.
“Oh– and don’t think you’re off the hook. What the hell were you doing on a trail? ”
Truth be told, he is surprised she didn’t grill him about that earlier. Her worry for him must’ve outweighed her annoyance.
“I had to, the dogs needed to be walked,” he says, raising his hands up as if she could see him. He leaves out the whole part about him being curious, she could probably do without that little fact.
“Uh huh, sure. Didn’t you say there’s a huge driveway? You couldn’t have walked them down that and not into the serial killer woods?”
“Hey! They need their enrichment, new smells are important to them.”
“Weak-ass excuse,” she comments dryly. He can imagine her rolling her eyes at him like she always does. She claims it’s because he’s annoying but something tells him otherwise.
They talk for a while longer — even though it’s mostly Nobara carrying the conversation while Yuuji does more schoolwork. Every once in a while he breaks her stream of consciousness off and asks a question, which she answers before launching back into her tangent.
“Speaking of, we won’t be spending Halloween together this year. That’s so dogshit.”
The sudden pivot of topic brings him back to the present. It’s a startling reminder that Halloween is tomorrow. Since the first year of Highschool, Junpei, Nobara, and him would all spend Halloween together. Even when one person was pissed at the other. It’s ironic that the first person to break this tradition would be him.
“Do you think Junpei will show up?” he asks, a bit of insecurity creeping into his voice. It’s silly, but he doesn’t want to be left out, especially if Junpei is going to be there. He can’t help but yearn for their little friend group to be connected again no matter how pissed he is at Junpei.
“...Probably not, I wouldn’t count on it. We can stream some horror movies though, make it a whole binge,” she answers, skipping over Junpei as fast as possible.
“Yeah we can do horror movies tomorrow, what time are you thinking?”
“I got a night class, but I’ll be back and showered by 11pm. We can do it then, just don’t fall asleep before that.”
11 is later than his usual bedtime, but he’ll definitely be awake. Especially since he isn't attending classes. He can hole up in his room and stream stuff until they pass out.
“Yeah, that works. ”
***
Darling is laying across his lap when Akito starts whining at the door to be let out. Of course, it’s when Yuuji just gets comfortable that he has to get up. Fuck it, it was about time to take them for another walk anyway.
“Akito, here,” he commands, rolling Darling off of him and lazily rising to his feet.
He knows they’re listening when he can hear their nails click and clack against the hardwood flooring as they follow him to the front door. He swipes the leashes that he left on a side table up and hooks them up carefully. It’s a normally quick process that’s made long as he tries to keep them still enough to grab their collars.
The gate is giving him more trouble today than yesterday, but a few firm shoulder slams has it swinging wide open, kicking up dust in its wake. Now there is an unfortunate amount of dirt sticking to his pink hair.
Akito surprisingly doesn’t pull or antagonize his siblings into pulling, so he’s able to walk slowly and enjoy the added sunlight he has for their little adventure. They pass by many familiar sights from yesterday; thick tree trunks, creeping vines, and thickly wooded bushes are all admired on their path. At some point they get far enough to see a huge fallen tree just a few paces away from the trail. Since it’s so close, and within sight of the very clear path, he feels safe enough to go investigate it. It’s heavily covered in a thick green moss that’s soft to the touch. A few ferns and grasses border it, and a few grow on top of it in areas that have patches of dirt. There are a few mushrooms within grabbing distance of the dogs, but he makes sure to carefully place himself between the potential snacks and their line of vision. He snaps some pictures of it but continues down the trail. It isn’t a super long one, and with the head-start of more light, they might make it most of the way there.
Twenty or so minutes pass peacefully. For the first time in a long time, he actually feels like a burden has been lifted off his shoulders. It’s like all the stress and trepidation from the last ten months has washed away, and he can finally take a deep breath. All Yuuji focuses on are the animals under his care, and the fresh air he gets to feel on his face. A strong pine and earthy smell assaults his nose, but in a way he welcomes. If he could, he would bottle the smell up and keep it forever.
Off to the side of the trail is a little (well worn) dirt path. A few thick roots stick out of the ground but it’s walkable. He only notices it when Akito suddenly swerves and pulls on his leash, insistent to go down the path. A sign, partially overgrown with ivy and well worn, has ‘Stellar pond’ engraved on it.
‘?’
Curiosity takes the better of him and he ends up treading down that little path, pushing through brush and grown-out branches that are face level. He will absolutely need to take a long shower when he gets back to the house. The dogs might even need a bath, if the increasingly softer ground is anything to go by.
The pond is large, spanning a decent portion of land. Weeping willow trees grow along the south and west shorelines. Their leaves and branches partially dip into the water. Lots of reeds and duckweed litter the surface of the water, with an occasional water lily thrown in. A few patches of cattails line the southern shore.
It’s scenic, and quiet. The silence is broken by the occasional duck quack or frog croak, but it remains tranquil. Yuuji sits down on a nearby log, pulling his phone out while trying to keep Darling from running off. He snaps a few pictures — attempting to take good angles like Nobara directed him to in the past — and sets his phone down beside him. Unfortunately, absolute chaos ensues when Darling sees a squirrel and takes off like a bullet, yanking him and nearly sending him sprawling across the dirt.
“No! Down!”
He doesn’t listen to him, and the other dogs join in, pulling and barking at a squirrel that has long since fled. It’s not easy controlling three fully grown huge dogs, but Yuuji is stronger than most.
Tightening his hold on their leashes, he yanks all three of them back and firmly tells them to heel. They all decide to listen for the first time in their doggy lives.
He sighs, walking along after them while they start sniffing along the pond bank. They aren’t allowed off-leash for their safety and the safety of other animals, so he has to walk along with them. At least he’s going to get his steps in.
More time passes, and eventually they all make their way back to the log they started at. Yuuji turns around to get a good look at the beautiful pond. The glare created from the sunlight hitting the surface of the water makes him squint his eyes to make out details. A few hefty ducks float around in the water, pushing their heads underwater in search of food. There’s a good hour or two until it’ll be dark, but he will need to start heading back soon.
He clicks, gaining the dog’s attention again as they make their way back to the trail. After half an hour (getting distracted by pretty flowers on the way back) they make it back to the house. It’s only an hour after that, that Yuuji makes the horrible realization that he doesn’t have his phone.
Fuck , fuck, fuck, fuckfuckfuck.
Taking a deep breath, Yuuji does a sweep of the house, hoping that it just got lost in the chaos, but it turns up nothing. No matter how many places he checks, his phone isn’t anywhere. A mild haze of panic hits him. If he loses his phone he’s isolated, and he’ll miss his call with Nobara. Frantically, he racks his brain for where he could have left his phone —before it hits him. He left it on that log. After he got distracted with the dogs, he never picked it back up.
There is still time to go get it. If he hurries he can be back before 7pm. Akito bumps his legs with his nose, making him realize he was white knuckling the granite countertop. Yuuji looks down, considering his situation for a moment. They would be fine by themselves for an hour or so, and there is still some daylight to guide his way back. The forest is extremely disorienting at night, even if he was following a trail, there’s still the risk of being guided off or accidentally injuring yourself. He bites his lip, drawing a bit of blood. It’s really important he has his phone, but it's also not the smartest to go out this late.
Ultimately his phone wins out. Cursing, he cracks his knuckles, letting out some stress now that he has a semi coherent plan put together. He would go back and re-trace his steps, and if he can’t find it he would have to pray that Nobara wouldn’t make a missing persons’ report. Or that Haruto gets home fast enough tomorrow to lend him his phone.
After double checking that the dogs are okay, he sets back out, going over the trail with a careful eye. He doesn't find shit until he gets back to the pond, where (just as he predicted) his phone lies on that godforsaken log. A mixture of relief and deep annoyance floods him. He is no longer in trouble of being stranded, but now he needs to bust his ass to get back before it gets dark.
The sweet glow of sunset is ending, leaving a lot of the light he used to guide himself to fade along with the day’s warmth. Fall’s bitter cold is starting to set in.
He just hopes he can make it back.
***
He failed.
It’s so fucking dark now, the light of his phone is barely enough to see the ground in front of him. The moon looms so ominously over the treeline. The sounds of the forest keep him distracted from the fact he’s alone. An owl calls in the distance, and the leaves gently rustle in the trees from the breeze. It’s peaceful despite it all. He’s only maybe 10 minutes away from the house. Unfortunately, he is stuck walking back because there’s not enough light to avoid possible injury if he goes any faster. There’s no cell service out here, so if he breaks a leg he is fucked.
A hare darts out of the bushes, completely startling him out of the lull he had unknowingly fallen into. It scares the shit out of him, making him yelp out an embarrassing squawk. The hare is back into the bushes as fast as it jumps out, leaving Yuuji to clutch at his racing heart.
Asshole, you didn't have to do that.
Sighing, he continues on, rubbing over his heart and glaring at the place the hare disappeared in. There’s some more rustling behind him but he ignores it. It’s just the sounds of the forest.
He somehow manages to successfully fall back into that relaxed state, until something once again picks at his senses. It starts out gradual, a little twinge of discomfort he attributes to nothing other than being outside late at night. But that discomfort travels up his neck, oh so slowly, until he keeps looking over his shoulder. It starts coy, just a glance to make sure there suddenly isn't a huge hulking man behind him or anything — but before he knows it, he’s paused in the middle of the walkway (phone still in hand) staring at an oppressive darkness. He strains his eyes, trying to make anything out, but there’s nothing. Even when he flashes his light to see better.
The birds have stopped singing, and the forest is eerily quiet. An animal (he is fairly certain is a fox) screams eerily in the distance. Silence doesn’t mean there’s a predator for sure, but it sure isn’t a good sign when he is vulnerable. Forcing himself to stay calm, he returns to walking. If he’s quickened his pace that’s between him and God.
Yuuji has only gone another hundred feet when he hears the crisp snap of a stick right-fucking-behind-him.
Whipping around quickly, he shines his phone’s flashlight. Squinting, he keeps combing over the path and surrounding trees. Normally, it would just be noise– nothing to be explicitly concerned about but everything has him on high alert. It’s probably just another stupid little hare that ran across the path while he wasn’t looking, but checking would sooth him.
And he’s right. There is nothing. For all of three seconds until he notices the eyes in the foliage . It is a miss-it-if-you-blink sorta thing, but he catches it. A red glint that reflects from the bright light. He locks up, heart dropping as he catches the rest of it. A large, sleek body is crouched down. It’s barely lighter than its surroundings, but from the parts he can see its absolutely fucking huge.
The feeling of discomfort makes a hell of a lot more sense now. He’s probably been stalked for a lot longer than he knows.
Heart thumping in his ears, he straightens his posture. The animal is big and curious (if he had to guess), but a few loud noises should scare it off. Just as he is about to open his mouth it moves. Slowly, it slinks out of the foliage. Its gait is strange— reminiscent of a person trying to crawl. Yuuji’s mouth drops open. That’s not a cougar, nor a bear. The head of the animal drops down, rows upon rows of teeth slowly peel back from a ragged muzzle. Ears are pointed directly to him, and those red, red eyes never leave him. It’s got the body of a wolf, but it’s so much bigger than any he's heard of before. His eyes are level with its shoulder blades, while it’s standing a good thirty feet away from him.
A growl comes from the chest of that thing . It’s so low and sinister it shakes him to his very bones. Slowly, Yuuji raises his hands up and takes a step back. It tilts its head, in a way that's puppy-like if it weren't for the disgusting cracking that comes as it moves its thick neck. A huge paw the size of his face extends, and mimics the step he took. That’s when he notices that one of the back legs must be wounded, because it drags along with a terrible scraping sound and is angled unnaturally.
All thoughts of scaring it off fly out the window. It’s wounded and he’s easy prey. Yuuji’s thoughts race, trying and failing to come up with a solution. So, he does something stupid— he turns and runs.
He used to find catharsis in running, and the adrenaline high that could be obtained. It was something he used to do to outrun his frustrations, as corny as that was. Whenever he was stressed, it would be his go-to. He had faith in his ability to sprint, in fact it was a highlight in school for him. But now it feels like too little too late.
Thundering footsteps echo behind him, rapidly gaining the distance he put between them. The rhythm of claws hitting the ground is discordant and out of sync, like the violent strike of the wrong beat. An angry, blood-curdling howl followed by the cracking of wood rings out into the open air. Instinctively, he tosses a look over his shoulder.
The animal? Wolf? Is currently doubled over something. It is nearly impossible to make any details out and he refuses to waste a single second. Impossibly, he hopes that he can make it. Or that the wolf will lose interest in him.
That fleeting hope is killed when he can hear squelching. It is sickening, and doesn’t mix well with the adrenaline coursing through his veins. Bile rises in his throat, singeing the back of it. He almost throws up, but he swallows it down. There is no time.
And he’s reminded of that fact, when the chase resumes. He’s created some space between them but within seconds repulsively hot breath trickles down his neck. In a moment that feels like an eternity, Yuuji is pushed to the ground, knocking the breath out of him. He can barely reach his left hand out before teeth rip into his shoulder. For a second, everything is numb, but once his brain catches up with the rest of his body he screams. Bloodcurdling and frightening. The strong bones are crushed instantly under the weight of those mighty, cruel jaws. The pain is so intense he can’t move. All function of his body seems to have slipped between his fingers.
The wolf clenches its jaw tighter, curling its lips back and pulling its head back. Yuuji’s body is flipped over, leaving his stomach exposed to the air. Cold dread strikes him, and he tries to protect his stomach. One arm won’t work, but he manages to dig his fingers into the eye of the beast and pull his legs toward his chest. Warm clear fluid mixed with blood drips down his hand and arm from the wolf’s eye. He screams, part pain, part anger. All the fear that’s built up has changed to rage.
It doesn’t react to having an eye injured. In fact, it’s not reacting to anything. Now, up close he can see it fully, in all its wretched glory. Its eyes are cloudy, with pupils blown wide. Saliva foams and bubbles at the wolf’s lips, dripping and drooling everywhere. Its fur is darkened from some sort of fluid, and it’s missing an ear. He reaches for a nearby rock, but is stopped from grabbing it fully by a paw with claws the size of his hand raking down his torso. Slowly.
Yuuji gasps, throwing his head back and cringing. The shock of it renders him unable to scream. Blood rises around the curved claws, and when it pulls its paw back, chunks of intestine come out with it.
Terror wraps around his throat, choking the breath out of him. He wheezes, shocked. There is a special type of disbelief that comes when you're dying.
The wolf lowers its head, growling and snarling as it starts lapping up the blood rapidly pouring out of him. The pressure from its tongue is like salt in the wound. He finds his voice again, and a scream is ripped from the depths of his throat.
He tries to rip its head from his abdomen, but it’s like moving a lead weight. No matter how much he scratches and digs, he can’t get free.
It stops, and for a moment Yuuji thinks it lost interest, until it starts convulsing violently. He starts wiggling, attempting to dislodge it while it's off-balance, but it just makes it more pissed. One giant paw slams down on his non-injured shoulder, claws carving new wounds. Still convulsing and twitching, the beast opens its jaws, hotly breathing over Yuuji’s face. Coughing and choking, something warm and thick starts to drip out of its mouth. The substance spatters all over, some even getting into his mouth before he shuts it.
It tastes like blood.
Confusion clears his mind from the haze of survival instinct for a moment. There’s a calculation to this, it’s not just mindless hunger. Or maybe the pain is finally frying his nerves.
The other leg presses down on his injured shoulder, forcefully shoving its long claws into the bitemarks. The motion is so fast he doesn’t have time to control his reaction and keep his mouth closed.
More of that blood substance is poured into his mouth, coating it in a foul metallic taste. Yuuji tries to spit it out but another hard press on his shoulder makes him swallow it. He nearly chokes on the disgusting liquid.
Yuuji’s consciousness becomes weak, every breath he takes is like a burden on his lungs. His vision narrows, and everything becomes so blurry. His ears ring incessantly, and sound fades in and out. Sensation starts to cut off, replaced by a feeling of burning .
The wolf is looking at him now, through those cloudy eyes, with nothing less than hatred. For a moment they make prolonged eye-contact. He breaks it first, nausea hitting him like a truck. It is almost like every nerve in his body is malfunctioning— probably because it is.
Contrary to popular belief, his life isn’t flashing before his eyes, it's more like a tidal wave of grief mixing, and bleeding slowly into him, tinging everything with a nonphysical pain. He doesn’t want to die like this— isolated from everyone and everything. He doesn’t want to die in the exact way his grandpa begged him not to. But it seems yet again he’s fucked up, and this time he won’t be able to make it back.
Tears prick at his eyes, from pain and further worsening his eyesight. Nobara won’t hear what happened to him, she won’t know. She’ll be worried for him, until they find his body (if there is anything left of it). He was so close to the house too, just a measly 1000 feet away from the backdoor.
As he finally drifts off, he can’t help but let his head thump down on the ground and stare at the moon. A faint crunching is audible, but he can’t feel any physical pain anymore; all that’s left is a bland acceptance.
His final thought as he gazes up is, ‘ I’m so sorry Nobara.’