Chapter Text
Restless rummaging through backpacks and chair-shifting were common during the last 10 minutes of the school day.
Hyun-tak, too, slowly packed away his pencil case. He was in a hurry, desperate to flee as quickly as possible, maybe check if Seongje had messaged him.
After all, two days had passed with no trace of him following that intense kiss. Hyun-tak wasn’t sure what exactly he’d expected from Seongje after what happened, but certainly not radio silence.
They were supposed to agree to pretend it never happened, because Hyun-tak still couldn’t process the fact that he’d kissed a boy for the second time.
The worst part was that Gotak actually got hard afterward. Dammit, he didn’t know why- but he hoped it was just a normal reaction.
“Hyoman, collect all the homework notebooks now! If anyone’s notebook is missing during checking, they lose a point!”
Five minutes until dismissal, and the teacher started barking orders. Hyun-tak wasn’t entirely sure, but she’d also mentioned something about classroom cleaning.
“Are you stupid? Hand over your notebook.”
Hyoman, the broad-shouldered ape, stood in front of him, glaring down at Gotak with a pissed-off, disdainful look as he chewed his gum like a cow. In his hand was a near-full stack of crumpled, dirty notebooks.
Hyun-tak flinched, glancing down at his desk where his fist was practically crushing the pencil case.
Huh? Didn’t I pack this already?
“Hurry up.”
Hyoman was growing impatient, despite having no right to demand anything.
Without speaking, Hyun-tak tossed the case into his backpack, then dug around for the homework notebook- which was nowhere to be found.
“Fuck,” Hyun-tak muttered under his breath.
Hyoman laughed at him, and as if that wasn’t pathetic and humiliating enough, he turned away to collect the remaining notebooks.
Hyun-tak ruffled his hair and grunted loudly, trying to keep his composure.
“Hey, Hyoman, who gave you the right to laugh, dead last in the entire grade?” Baku yelled from the back, having seen everything.
Hyoman’s face flushed, but he refused to back down, throwing a punch into the air like he was ready to swing at Baku.
“Yo, this bastard’s got guts,” Baku laughed, mocking him while looking around.
“What’s all the commotion back there?” shouted the teacher, draining her coffee.
Rinnnnngggg
Finally, that was all Hyun-tak could process in his head. School’s out, time to bounce.
“Gotak, where are you going?” Juntae called after the boy who was already halfway out the door.
Hyun-tak turned around, giving his friends a questioning look, as if he hadn’t just tried to bolt without a goodbye.
“We have cleanup duty,” Baku muttered, smacking a notebook onto Suho’s unconscious head.
Hyun-tak’s eyebrows dipped, letting out a hesitant
“Ah.”
“Technically, it’s you and Suho, but he’s asleep, so we’re helping,” Sieun half-whispered from the side,
dropping his overly neat backpack- always carried so upright, loudly next to Suho’s desk.
Suho snored, startling awake at the noise, a weird sound escaping as he belched.
Everyone agreed to clean up together, sweeping aside the day’s accumulated trash- a chaotic mix of candy wrappers, crumpled papers and dirt.
“Ew!” Juntae yelled upon discovering a still-soft piece of gum under Hyoman’s chair.
“Yaya, wait!” Baku shouted, an idea striking him.
He rushed to the table next to Juntae and grabbed the gross, wet gum.
“You’re such a crazy bastard,” Suho bellowed, watching from his seat, while Sieun wordlessly swept past him.
“Zap!” Baku exclaimed as he glued the notebooks together under Baku’s desk.
Juntae shook his head in disbelief, and Sieun’s face twisted in disappointment.
Suddenly, Suho- now scrolling through his phone, let out a shout.
"Hey, come here,"
but no one moved. In fact, everyone kept cleaning because they were all busy except for the lazy sack sleeping on his pink-colored apricot plush toy.
"Hyoman posted something cringe in his story,"
now Baku turned and asked, "What?"
"Look for yourself,"
Baku rolled his eyes, and Sieun, who was now cleaning the windows, hesitated too.
Still, they all gathered around Suho's desk including Hyun-tak.
On KakaoTalk, in Hyoman's story, there was a posted picture. It showed Hyoman himself with teary eyes and a pouting face, behind him a sterile hospital room and a patient lying on a bed, his face badly disfigured.
The caption read, "My brother, get well soon."
"He had such big balls earlier, and now he's crying," Baku laughed.
Juntae nudged him with his shoulder and gave him a "read the room" look.
Suho scrolled further down, where a longer text in the comments caught his eye. Amid overly dramatic condolence messages with hundreds of emojis, someone had written what happened.
"I heard Geum Seongje beat him up. Dudes passed out but is conscious now."
"Yeah, his knee is completely mangled. That guy is insane, seriously messed up,"
someone replied.
Below were comments mocking the guy and Hyoman while idolizing Seongje.
When Hyun-tak reached the comment about the knee, his breath hitched. It couldn’t have anything to do with him, could it?
Suho shook his head, Sieun now looked angry too, while Baku dramatically paced the classroom muttering, "I’ll kill that crazy bastard."
"Hey, scroll down," Hyun-tak ordered.
Suho obeyed and scrolled down a bit, where a particular comment stood out: "He almost broke his left knee, heard he whispered some name while beating him up. Kinda badass if u ask me lol. “
Hyun-tak's breath stopped completely for a minute, like a clock whose hands had ceased to function. He coughed lightly, his knee trembling beneath his loose jeans. His heart skipped a beat, nearly leaping out of his chest.
Was this a warning? Was Seongje angry about what Hyun-tak had done that night?
“This is insane, man. Does this guy have a thing for knees?” Suho asked, shaking his head.
But Hyun-tak didn’t respond anymore. He slipped away under all the stunned exclamations and chatter.
He needed to find Seongje, that damn psycho.
He finally checked his phone but found no trace of Seongje- no calls, no messages.
Hyun-tak didn’t even know what to say if he ran into him. And how was he supposed to find him? Where was Seongje hanging out, anyway?
One thing he knew for sure: he absolutely wasn’t going home now.
Sooner or later, his friends would show up at his place looking for him and settle into his room again.
So, he decided to head to the basketball court and sink a few shots, clear his head, and maybe calm down.
Frustratingly, he didn’t make every basket. Some barely went in; others rolled around the rim before falling out.
Still, he managed to release some of the built-up tension. His arms trembled slightly, and he couldn’t shake the strange sensation in his right knee.
Phantom pain? The “accident” had been almost four months ago.
He decided to take a short break and sat down on a bench.
KakaoTalk, then? He opened the archived app, which he used occasionally, and searched for Hyoman which was easier to find than ever.
Suho must have been on KakaoTalk a lot, how else would he have stumbled upon Hyoman’s account?
After the hospital photo, there were no new posts, as if Hyoman had vanished into thin air. It seemed he was mourning someone who was still alive.
Still, no one could deny it was deeply unsettling, even if it was that weirdo’s friend.
Hyun-tak scrolled through the comments again and came across more recent ones. The usual, repetitive remarks mixed with well-wishes for recovery.
Was it because of him, or just Seongje’s unpredictable nature? Probably the latter. Still, Hyun-tak felt somewhat guilty.
His heart felt heavier than usual, the sight of the boy left him with an uneasy feeling. So disfigured, swollen, and covered in bruises.
Gotak sighed and put his phone aside.
One thing he realized was that Seongje was human. He too had feelings, reactions, and emotions.
This attack wasn’t just another one of Seongje's sadistic fantasies but a reaction.
Did he feel something for Hyun-tak?
It could never be love, or anything intimate, but Hyun-tak must have been something in Seongje's eyes.
Why was everything so complicated between them?
That evening, Hyun-tak came home late, only to find his mother awake again in the living room, watching a rom-com. A warm giggle or shocked sob escaped her now and then.
Hyun-tak greeted her and sat down beside her.
Just then, an emotional scene was playing- the couple's in-laws were taking care of the newborn baby while the parents gazed at the starry sky. Typical cheesy rom-com stuff.
"Hyun-tak, someday when you have kids, it'll be just like this,"
She stroked his head and twirled his hair around.
Hyun-tak gave her a warm smile, with more hidden behind it.
Saturday 12:00 PM
"Gotak, you lazy bastard, wake up," buzzed an annoying voice over him.
Hyun-tak's eyes slowly opened. In front of him stood Baku and Juntae holding a photo album.
"Hey, Juntae, check this out!" Baku exclaimed excitedly.
Hyun-tak, who had no idea what was going on, grabbed a pillow and threw it over his head, pressing it down so hard he nearly suffocated. "Get lost," he mumbled under the pillow.
ding ding ding.
Now Juntae held an alarm clock right under the pillow, next to Hyun-tak's ear.
"Fuck, fine, I'm getting dressed."
Hyun-tak looked at himself in the mirror and wondered just what the hell these two were doing at his place so early, why he'd slept so long, and why he looked the way he did right now.
Hair combed, teeth brushed, and some random clothes thrown on- the combination was a matter of taste. At least the colors matched, since Hyun-tak owned almost no colorful clothes except for blue ones.
When he entered the kitchen, he smelled mandarins and other fruits. Through the wall, he heard overdramatic noises.
He stuffed his mouth with mandarins, crushed them, and walked into the living room.
There, on the floor by the small dining table, Baku, Juntae, and his mother were gathered, flipping through a baby photo album.
"You know, just yesterday we watched such a wonderful movie. Imagine Hyun-tak's future kids," Hyun-tak's mother cooed proudly.
"Ya Gotak, there you are, you baby boy," Baku laughed while turning the pages.
"Awww," Juntae murmured.
Hyun-tak, visibly confused, leaned against the living room doorframe as if half-asleep.
He forced a light laugh and glared at his mother, who returned a guilty look.
"I’ll have to do this with your future girlfriend too," she teased.
Oh, not this again. If she wanted him to have a girlfriend so badly, why didn’t she just find one for him?
Besides, Hyun-tak had way bigger worries than a girlfriend, he had a whole other fiesta going on.
He was questioning his feelings for Seongje. A boy.
"Maybe I should show your new friend some too," she muttered to herself.
Big mistake.
"Huh? Tak-ah, you have friends besides us? How could you?" Juntae whined.
"Are you replacing us?" Baku asked sarcastically.
Hyun-tak sighed and shook his head. "No, it's fine."
"He doesn’t talk much, but back then, every guy wanted to look like him."
She rambled on as if daydreaming.
"Mom, enough," Hyun-tak muttered under his breath.
Hyun-tak rolled his eyes while the others started giving skeptical looks.
"You don’t know him."
"What was his name again? Ge-"
"What are you guys even doing here?" Hyun-tak interrupted her, although he felt terrible about it.
Things couldn’t get any worse, they were there to
ask why he had run off after cleaning duty and why he had been acting so strangely.
Somehow, they still managed to make their way into Hyun-tak's room.
Baku cleared his throat slightly and then asked the dumbest question possible:
"You got a girlfriend?"
Not this bullshit now.
"Nah, man, I’d tell you guys if I did, just so you’d shut up,"
Baku was perched on the bed, as always, overdressed- a vest over a red hoodie, black sweats. Juntae had squeezed himself into tight jeans and a snug shirt sitting on Gotaks chair, while Hyun-tak remained standing, as if he was about to kick them both out any second.
"But you’re always glued to your phone…Suho said so too!" Juntae added.
Silence followed, but Baku broke it.
"Hey, why don’t we go on a double date?"
That was out of the question.
"And what about me???" whined Juntae.
Baku shrugged and laughed at him.
Since Hyun-tak was certain these attention-starved kids weren’t leaving his room, at least not without him- he suggested they play ping pong.
And just like that, they stood in front of a ping pong hall.
Baku had picked the first one Google suggested; they had to take a half-hour bus ride and navigate through some shady underground alleys to get there.
Inside, groups of teenage boys and girls were gathered- some drinking (alcohol, to be specific), others aiming darts. The large space was filled with loud chatter, arguments, and chaos.
"Okay, isn’t there something like this near us but, like, normal?"
"What the hell did you even type into Google?" Hyun-tak asked.
But Baku didn’t respond. Instead, his eyes were fixed on a crowd of people, a specific group.
Among them was Seongje, leaning against a wall next to a large half-open window decorated with LED lights and half-hidden by blinds.
He stood there smoking a cigarette, occasionally speaking, but he didn’t notice- or ignored Baku’s sharp stare.
"Guys."
Juntae and Gotak, slightly confused, followed his gaze.
Hyun-tak recognized the person instantly- Seongje. He looked right back as if he had eyes only for him. Then his gaze shifted oddly… and he turned back to the crowd, as if Gotak were just some boring zoo animal.
"Why was he looking at you like that?" Juntae asked nervously.
"No idea," Hyun-tak muttered under his breath.
Is he ignoring me?
Hyun-tak clenched his fists and took confident steps forward, but Baku stopped him.
"Hey, I thought we weren’t fighting anymore?" Baku said with a serious look.
But Gotak didn’t want to fight- or did he?
"Let’s just go," Juntae suggested.
"Nah." Shrugged Baku confident.
Hyun-tak was equally determined not to leave. Without answering, he walked to the bar and ordered three drinks.
Now they sat side by side on three barstools, tense and annoyed.
"What’s that bastard doing here?"
They glanced over occasionally- at least Juntae did. Updating the others on what Seongje was doing, who he was talking to, or where he was heading.
Suddenly, Juntae tapped Hyun-tak’s shoulder urgently and whispered, "Hey, he’s coming over."
Seongje stopped right beside Hyun-tak, as if there wasn’t plenty of space at the bar, and ordered a glass of soju.
The abrupt closeness sent chills down Hyun-tak's spine, his heart pounded of fear and something else he couldn't place.
Why was he so close? Scrap that, why was his body reacting weirdly to this punk?
Seongje smelled like some sweet, unrecognizable drink, aftershave, and a mix of cigarettes.
Hyun-tak's eyes wandered "subtly," taking in Seongje’s appearance with a sidelong glance.
Black shorts, a red-and-black fleece jacket zipped up to the neck. His hair was neatly combed.
"What the hell are you doing here, bastard?" Baku snapped irritably.
But Seongje ignored him and started laughing, then glanced at Juntae and Baku as if Hyun-tak wasn’t even there. His jacket brushed against Hyun-tak's arm as he leaned forward. The touch sent goosebumps down his spine.
„Isn’t Sieun with you guys? “ A short smirk, then just: "Too bad."
"Stay away from Sieun," Baku growled, nearly standing up but held back by Juntae.
Really, that should've been Hyun-tak's line, and he should've been the one to stand up, but he was slowly losing his mind.
When he noticed and snapped out of his daze, he muttered.
"Fuck off." as he stared down at his hands clutching the glass. No courage to meet Seongje’s eyes- yet he’d still said it.
„Okay“
Only the scent remained; cigarettes mixed with lavender- as Seongje clicked his tongue and walked away.
A finger-shaped mark formed on Hyun-tak’s neck- before leaving, Seongje had gripped the bite scar he himself had inflicted.
"You alright, Hyun-tak?" Baku asked once they’d cooled down a bit.
"Yeah, go ahead. I’ll hit the bathroom first."
He’d lost track again of how much he had drunk. Typical. He always overdid it once a glass was in his hand.
Those drinks had to go now, so he joined the line for the urinals, those typical open stalls without doors or proper toilets.
Hyun-tak was there long enough to call it an understatement if you described it as "a while."
The same thought gnawed at him “where was Sieun?” It pissed him off that Seongje had only asked about him.
His left ear picked up someone entering, heavy footsteps growing closer.
Everything there was exposed…
Yet the guy in question stopped right next to Hyun-tak, unzipped his fly, and got to business.
The same scent hit Hyun-tak’s nose. He didn’t want to acknowledge it, but something about it was familiar, almost soothing- and that infuriated him.
He already knew who stood there. Still, his gaze flicked down against his will, taking in Seongje’s side, and immediately he cursed himself.
Gotak zipped up and headed to the sink. The two sections were divided by doors, but as soon as Hyun-tak reached for the knob, a heavy hand pressed against it.
Behind it, Seongje reappeared.
Neither looked at the other while washing their hands- except Hyun-tak, who tracked him through the mirror’s reflection the whole time.
Though Seongje stayed silent, pretending to be a ghost, he stayed close to Gotak, even positioning himself right alongside him at the sink.
"The hell you starin’ at?"
Fuck. His staring had been caught.
"Why the fuck are you following me everywhere?" Hyun-tak fired back.
"Coincidence," Seongje smirked, drying his hands. As he passed, he stopped directly behind Hyun-tak.
"Why’d you beat that guy up?"
Hyun-tak wasn’t sure if this was smart; he knew Seongje wanted him to finally bring it up. But he wouldn’t play the game Seongje’s way- living like this, without communication outright, was driving him slowly insane.
"He kinda looked like you," Seongje laughed sarcastically.
"You’re always thinking about me, huh? Can’t get me out of your head?" It sounded more like a statement than a question.
Suddenly, Seongje clamped a hand around Hyun-tak’s throat and slammed him into the wall. He choked him, not enough to be lethal, just enough to assert dominance.
Hyun-tak gasped sharply, the grip on his neck hurt while the bite marks were being stretched.
"I hate you, Seongje."
"I wanna kill you," Seongje snarled.
"You’re always chasing me, fucking want things from me, then bounce once you get them!" Hyun-tak half-shouted.
"You liked me taking control. Otherwise, you would’ve pushed me off earlier."
The choking tightened. Seongje grinned, yet his expression burned with fury.
He leaned in- so close they nearly kissed.
This time, though, Hyun-tak shoved him back, hard enough that Seongje crashed into the opposite wall.
Without another word, Hyun-tak turned and stormed out, the door slamming shut behind him.
The walk home was tense, silent. Juntae, Baku, and Hyun-tak sat stewing in their foul moods, each looking into other directions.