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the room was deadly silent
“You heared the board. Get out.”
He tried to argue against everyone, but their stares, their attitudes and Sculleys face made his heart sink like never before. He felt a chest pain that he only felt when a product didnt go well with the public.
“Fine.” He obliged. He got all of his things, with a shaky but sure grip. His eyes were trembling with an unexplainable anger he wasnt used to experiencing. He felt anger in alot of ways, mostly aggressive. But this pathetic, depressive anger only hit him in extreme situations. He wasnt becoming weak, was he?
As he approached the door, he turned around to stare back at sculley and moved his lips “Dont come begging me to come back, ok?”
And with that, Steve Jobs is no longer associated with the Apple company.
He walked over to his car, with softer movements he opened the front seat and closed it back once he placed both of his feet inside of the car. Once he was completely excluded from the outside world, he did nothing but place his head on the horn. His head felt heavier than usual, his thoughts were bringing it down, he thought. His eyes were ever barely this wet. Hes not used to it and he doesnt like it.
He tightened the grip on the steering wheel to make his knuckles hurt
i deserve this i deserve this i deserve this i deserve this i
Deep breaths. Thats what he said to himself as he slowly raised his head and started the car
He drove straight home. No stops, no food, nothing. Straight home, alone. In silence.
The second he stepped in, he took his shoes and socks off, placed them near the door and walked in the main room. He tried looking for things to calm him down but every single thing caused him such a big nauseating anger that he ended up just. Crumbling.
The anger was too much. He started violently ripping away the skin from his lower lip with his upper teeth as tears started slowly pouring down his cheeks. He could barely see. His vision blurred, his breathing unstable, his body weak. He fell to his knees, hugging his stomach. He wasnt crying because he was sad, no. He was mad. Mad at sculley, furious at his ex so-called “loyal” employees, mad at wozniak and. Mad at himself.
He shouldve known, he shouldnt have let himself be so vulnerable about all of them. He shouldnt have let them get under his skin. He shouldve been perfect, he shouldve managed everything perfectly. Yet here he was. Sad. Alone. Pathetic. Noone to hold him but himself.
As he sobbed himself away, he layed on the cold, hard, rigid floor. Almost lifeless. No hiccups, just tears. Tears constantly travelling from his eyes down to his chin. His thoughts were all hiding away. He had so many things on his mind that none of them managed to make sense or connect in one way or another.
Where did he go from there? What was he even gonna do? His life work, dreams and hopes all thrown away because of some stupid cunts who he even considered worthy enough to work under him. Disappointing
He wanted to act, he wanted to destroy, but his body couldnt. His body refused to get off the floor.
It refused to drink water, to eat, or do anything so he just. Fell asleep. Right then and there. Fully dressed, on the hard, cold floor. He felt like he didnt have anything to humanize him anyway so why not just, stop caring all together.
in the meantime, Someone was watching him; not directly, but he read the news paper and instantly knew what he had to do.
“THEY FIRED HIM?????”
“YEAH DUDE Isnt it crazy? Hes finally gone. Were gonna be more than fine after this one.” Paul joked, but once he turned to bill, he could immediately tell how stressed he was
The other man was biting his fingernails out of fear, rocking in his chair to relieve stress. He didnt realize it when he did it, his strange behaviour often pointed out by his friends or colleagues, tho.
“Uh.. You…. Ok?”
“I need to check up on him now”
“What.”
“i NEED. To check up on him. NOW.”
“wh— uh. WHY???”
Bill immediately jumped from his seat, rushing to get his coat to get ready and run outside. “You dont understand, man. That guy is not dangerous to others unstable but accidentally dangerous to himself. Theres two possible scenarios; One, hes…. hes fucking meditating, two hes destroyed his entire house and is plotting revenge somehow”
“I need to see if hes ok”
This was serious for him. Steve could put himself in serious danger, not to mention how extremely explosive he is to himself when hes mad at others. Usually, bill helps him calm down but since no calls were recieved the entire night, he was worried. Why? Dont worry about it.
as he fastly grabbed all of his things, he rushed himself to the door, but before he could leave, he let the other man speak
“Since when were you so good at analysing the all-mighty steve jobs?”
“Since today. Bye” with a stiff response, in a matter of under a second he was gone.
He almost tripped on the way to the car because of how in a rush he was. He ended up speeding again but managed to get away with it. THATS how serious it was
He arrived at steves place, parked like shit (if you can even CONSIDER IT parking) and ran out of the car. As he walked towards the front door he started digging in his pockets filled with random stuff for the pair of keys that Steve gave him a few months prior.
He manages to find them, struggles to open the door at first until he slams it open
“STEVE” he yelled “IM HERE TO— wh”
He notices steve body sticking out of the main room from the entrance, from his prospective, He looked like hed seen much better days
“STEVE? Oh my—“ He threw everything he had that could make him uncomfortable on the ground; jacket, shoes, anything and rushed himself, falling multiple times and hitting his knees, bruising them a little.
He managed to get to the other mans body in a fraction of a second. He could already feel his tears coming up. He started shaking him aggressively, “Dude please this isnt funny” desperately trying to get him to do Anything. Anything that could make him come back. He needs Steve alive he needs him alive he—
…
He saw steve slowly open his eyes. He stared at the ceiling for a second, before moving his gaze towards Bill. He raised his hand and moved it to grab the other mans shirt, clinging onto him
“b…bill???” his soft, damaged and trembling mouth spoke. “Billllllll………” He puts his other hand on the mans chest and slowly pulls closer, shutting his eyelids as he layed in gates’ arms
Bill stared at him, shocked at what he had just witnessed. He sighed with relief and placed a hand behind job’s back. He decided it was best if he picked him up and put him to sleep maybe somewhere that isnt the floor.
He placed him on the nearest bed and covered him up with a small bedsheet. He had no idea how to do this but hey, he felt like he was doing a good job for the first time.
Bill went back to the main room to see if he had to fix anything, then he noticed it. Apparently, shortly after steve’s crying fit, he managed to crawl from where he was to the fridge, get 5 whole beers, go back in the old spot and started chugging down as much as he could. He finished 4 of them, the 5th one was drooling beer on the floor. Bill rolled his eyes in disgust but decided to clean it up anyways
Once he was done, he softly walked back to steve, staring at him from afar the. finally sitting next to him in bed. He placed both of his hands on it to hold himself better, one was near jobs face
“billlll….” steve reached out with his hand for gates touch and grabbed the closest hand to hIs face. He held onto it dearly, like it was a treasure.
“Oh uh— Yes, steve?”
“they fired me. They left me to rot.” He said, dramatically. Acting it out like he was there, like the scenario was replaying constantly in his life. How rveryone stared at him, the looks, the hate. He wasnt used to caring so much about what others thought of him but, now that it came from the only place he truly felt free to express himself, it kinda hurt.
Bill looked at him for a second then looked away, adjusting himself on the bed to get a better look at the man. He couldnt find the words to tell him everything was gonna be okay, if it even was gonna be ok in the first place.
“You shouldnt think about that right now. You should rest for a bit. We can talk about this in the morning.” he said as he got his other hand, the one that wasnt holding the trembling hand of the other, and slowly moved steves long brown hair behind his ear as to not cover his face.
As the words echoed in the room, his eyelids slowly opened enough for bill to see that steve was still awake. He stared at a blank point as he tightened his grip around bills hand. “Are you gonna leave me too”
Again, Bill couldnt get any words out of his mouth, he didnt know how to respond. They were still commercial enemies by the public, their relationship could severely damage both of their companies. He was scared of what the public was gonna say if they, somehow, find out about all of this.
He couldnt help but look at his so-called “enemy” and admire him. Even in such a delicate mess he managed to be a beautiful person. Yeah sure he had his flaws like being annoying, extremely irrational, easily irritated, impatient and many more but, the very few times he saw him in a vulnerable state he realized how beautiful he truly was.
“Do you want me to stay the night.” completely dodging the question
“Please” his voice trembled
…
Bill sighed, he knew he couldnt get away from this so he just decided to let himself go this time. He took his glasses off and placed them on the bedside table, he then laid down next to jobs, he didnt tell him to move away, but the other gave him some space. Steve wasnt the usual silent type, so all of this silence between them was making bill feel bad.
Steves brain was foggy, he felt something weighing him down. Maybe it was all the hatered he felt for himself that night, maybe the alcohol was hitting him extra hard that night. Maybe he just needed an excuse to justify all the hatred he was feeling towards himself. He couldnt feel anything.
Once bill laid down next to him, steve held onto him and refused to let go, burying his face in the other man’s chest, in a search of comfort.
Bill could feel his grip on his back, he was holding like he was holding on for dear life. He didnt like staying there looking at him and doing nothing. He moved his hand from his cheek to steves hair, slowly caressing his head.
after some slight hesitation, he leaned in and hugged him back, with a grip not as strong as steve’s but tight enough to pull him closer, making the two basically face eachother. Only then, steve let himself be fully weak and softened the grip. His eyes closed and his face went from a worried and stressed expression to a soft and relaxed one.
Bills hand brushing his hair and the comforting silence helped him calm down, even if slightly. He could finally sleep slightly peacefully; and thats what he did. Few moments passed and bill could feel himself slip away too so he decided to embrace it and they both fell into eachothers arms.
The morning arrived, the curtains were slightly closed, which caused a ray of sunshine to shine directly on bill’s closed eyes. He squinted them and proceeded to drag his hands up and down on his face. His eyelids were heavy but he managed to slowly lift himself up from bed, grab his glasses and look around.
he went to reach for steve but when he realized no one was there, his heart sunk. He started panicking.
He immediately ran in the main room; “STEVE WHERE— Oh.” the stress in his eyes dissapeared once he saw steve cooking breakfast for the two. He was mumbling a songs under his breath that bill could Not make out for the love of him.
“Oh. Morning Bill, did ya sleep well?” He said, moving and talking like everything that just happened the night prior had never happened. He was smiling, his hair was perfect like usual and his demeanour was overall extremely unusual for someone who had 4 and a half bottles of beer the night prior.
“I, uh, slept well. I guess.” Bill raised his eyebrow, he felt kinda worried at this sudden switch
“Hey uh. Steve?”
“Yeah whats up”
“How come are you acting all…Happy?.. I mean not that its a bad thing ofcourse just.. you switched up very fast.”
Silence filled the room, steve was, ofcourse, not facing bill. Why would he need to face him? Its a useless thing to do. Facing his problems was much harder than just ignoring them, so why not do that with confrontation too.
“I dont know what youre talking about.” From an happy and playful tone, he immediately went cold. His words were sharp and honestly hard to not stress over, especially for someone who worried too much about everything like bill.
He knew what steve was doing tho, and didnt allow any of it one bit. “I know what youre trying to do and its not gonna work with me, Steve.” He slowly walked up to him, giving him personal space as always. He didnt want to rush him. His expression went immediately to a serious one. He was upset, but he was moreso worried about him.
Steve smashed his fist on the counter and started breathing aggressively, causing bill to jump back slightly. The mask he put up was already cracking and he didnt even notice. “I don’t need your charity work, Gates. You act like you can read me but you cant. You dont know who i truly am.”
“Then who are you? Tell me.”
Steves breathing morfed into a tired, fake laugh. “Im the aggressive one, im the one that screams, yells and punishes others unless he gets his way. Thats what happens when you let Steve jobs be himself around others”
bill scoffed “So?”
he tightened his grip on the counter and slowly turned his head to face bill
“So.?”
“Yeah, So??? Yeah sure youre a piece of shit most of the time—“ “HaHa.” steve interrupted bill, laughing sarcastically, offended by him.
“Let me finish.”
“—but, if you manage to work on yourself a little more, people will stop ‘despising you’ or whatever the hell you think theyre doing and youll see that everything will change.”
Steve untightened his grip from the counter and turned around, still refusing to look at bill in the eyes. He was finally accepting confrontation.
“Fine.”
Bill smiled at him, even if slightly he knew that steve would notice it.
Steves eyes moved to check on bill and when he saw that stupid smile of his, his cheeks lit on fire. He wasnt used to this type of affection and he surely wasnt used to giving it out either, he only gave away romantic affection to people when he didnt mean it.
Suddently, smoke started appearing behind Steve, like his flustered face was producing smoke but…
“Hey dude” Bill raised his eyebrows
“What”
“Your food is on fire”
Steve turned around and realized how badly the food ended up. “FUCK”
they recovered what they could from the remaining food and ate what was left.
Bill looked at steve and chuckled. “The good news is that the parts that we saved taste good!”
“fuck you man”